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imagineaworlds · 3 years

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I Love You (Part Forty-Three) -- Aaron Hotchner

Written By: @desperately-bisexual

Request: None.

Warnings: Cursing. Kidnapping, death, torture, panic attack, PTSD-- everything Criminal Minds.

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Greenaway!Reader

Word Count: 20,827

Timeline: Season 6 Episode 17 + 18. Three months after part forty-two.

I was… miserable. I felt like this big bubble that was waddling and bumping into everything, and I was entirely useless when it came to cases. Since the Appalachian Trail case, Hotch and I had decided that I would stay out of the field once I started to show; but now that I was bubble-size pregnant, he told me that it was either I stayed in the office with Garcia or I went home and rested in bed. Those were my only two options. There was no getting on the jet with the team, no wandering to the grocery store on a random Sunday, no escaping to get lunch with someone. Nothing. If I didn’t have food in the office, Anderson had to go get it for me. Poor guy.

But, honestly, I wasn’t even fighting Hotch on it anymore. I knew that I wasn’t going to be any help out in the field considering my feet hurt if I was standing for too long. I couldn’t imagine the next three months—at least. JJ and I were talking one day, and she told me to save my strength, because the cliché nine months was more like ten months, if my doctors knew what they were doing. Ugh. I just wanted this part to be over with. I hated feeling stagnant and useless. I liked going out into the field, working on the profiles, chasing the Unsubs, saving the victims. That was my life. And now I had to put that all aside for about another three months or so. It was worth it, though. Every single day that I was miserable was still worth it because it meant that before we would know it, we would have our baby in our arms. I could live with being bored and sick all the time just for that.

Hotch pitied me somewhat, however, and he really sucked at hiding it. He knew that I wanted a child, and he knew that I was excited—just as he was—but he also knew that I was itching to get back to work. Our deal was for my own benefit, but it was probably going to kill me before anything else. I needed the field. So fucking bad. He knew it, Morgan knew it, Emily knew it— Everyone knew it.

So, Hotch and I decided to host a dinner party one Friday night. He liked cooking sometimes, and he hadn’t gotten the chance to do so in a very long time, so I was fine with the idea of having people over, though it was draining at times. I called Emily to see if she wanted to come over for the dinner with Morgan and Rossi, since they were the only ones available on the team. Spencer was headed to some Russian film showing, JJ was busy with Will and the kids, and Garcia had a date.

But when we invited Emily, she was almost hostile towards us. I mean, she never, ever brushed us off; but even then, this was so cold and offensive. I had never heard her like that before. When we called her, I greeted her warmly, but I was met with an inconsiderate: “Hi.” And that was it! As I explained that we were having a family dinner with our friends, she then said: “I really don’t have time for that shit, Y/N. I’ll see you at work.” And then she hung up on me. I scoffed while turning to Aaron, trying to decide if he had any answers or not. He didn’t.

At dinner, I brought it up to see if anyone else knew anything. There had to be a reason that Emily would snap at me like that, right? Come on, she would have never in a million years done that to me—or anyone else on the team. Even if she were busy, she would have been overwhelmingly kind and apologetic about not being able to come to dinner. Something was off.

“She was probably in the middle of something and just forgot to call back to apologize,” Morgan offered behind a mouthful of steak.

I shook my head. That wasn’t it. She specifically said she didn’t have time for my call and for dinner— or really any distraction. There was no hint to her calling back later. There was something else that we were missing, and if we didn’t figure it out soon, I was genuinely going to confront her about it. The thing with Emily Prentiss, however, was that she enjoyed her secrets, and she enjoyed playing her cards close to her chest. Prying hardly ever worked with her, but maybe if I tried just this one, and if it was really all that bad, she’d confide in me. I mean, back after New York when I was upset about JJ and Morgan doubting me and Hotch, Emily was the only person I could confide in, too. Maybe this one time I could be that for her.

“She has her bad days, too, Y/N; you can’t take it personally,” Rossi said.

But I was taking it personally. They hadn’t heard her voice, the way it was gruff, demanding, and angry. Yeah, it sounded like her mind was elsewhere, but that gave her no right to talk to me, her friend, like that. We weren’t the closest. I would be the first to admit that Emily Prentiss and I weren’t exactly sisters forever, but I still loved her dearly, and she loved me equally. We looked after each other. And ever since Hawai’i, when the team found out that I was pregnant, she was over the moon excited to meet my child. She couldn’t stop talking about it. All this time, I thought that Morgan and Garcia were going to be the aunt and uncle who would spoil them a ridiculous amount, but now I was starting to worry that it was actually going to be Emily doing all of the spoiling. That was concerning. But I still loved it. I loved that she was as excited as Hotch, Morgan, and I were. I was excited that I would get to see her, my friend, holding my baby.

“Give it a few days, baby,” Hotch said before downing a spoonful of mashed potatoes. “If she hasn’t cheered up by then, you could talk to her—or, if you want, I’ll talk to her, and make it seem like it’s in an official capacity so that she doesn’t feel attacked.”

I rolled my eyes. That wasn’t going to solve anything. She wasn’t snapping at Hotch, she was snapping at me. The more we discussed it, the more upset I got. I eventually pushed my plateful of food away from me and set my hands over my stomach as I reclined back. The boys didn’t notice how I had fallen silent as they finished up their meals, then Rossi offered to clean up the dishes while Hotch and Morgan worked together to plate up the brownies Hotch made that afternoon with some ice cream. Then, throughout dessert, they talked about sports. I shook my head and took my leave early to go lay down before it got too late.

----

In the morning, mine and Hotch’s alarms went off simultaneously. I groaned and rolled over to turn it off. As I struggled to push myself upright, I saw that Hotch was already awake and dressed, taking a few steps back over to his bedside table in order to turn off his alarm. Somewhat forgetting about what happened yesterday, I smiled at him. He smiled back shortly.

As I slid out from under the covers, Hotch hurried over to hold his arms out to make sure I wouldn’t fall over or hurt myself or something. I laughed at him while playfully shooing his hands away, then leaning up and in to kiss him delicately. He kissed me back until we couldn’t breathe.

“Good morning, Agent Hotchner,” I whispered against his lips.

He tangled his fingers in my already messy hair. “Good morning, Agent Hotchner.” He kissed my jawline until I threw my head back to give him clearer access to my neck. It wasn’t a sexual act. I mean, normally it was, and it had a tendency to get us both riled up; but the way he was only barely leaving kissed against me compared to nibbling until he left a noticeable hickey was enough to just let me relax and fall in love with him again and again. “Are you feeling any better?”

“Kinda.”

“Good…” He ran his hands over my arms until my shoulders relaxed, then he hugged me so that he could rub my back until my spine relaxed, and then he lastly trailed back to my stomach until my whole body felt at ease, and the only thought I had was about how much I loved him. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

After another minute or so, Hotch pulled away from me entirely so that he could kiss my lips one more time before heading back into the bathroom to gel back his hair. Feeling practically rejuvenated for the day, I wandered—or more like waddled—my way to our closet so that I could pick out my clothes. A whole new wardrobe was laid out in front of me. Some clothes, like the sweatshirt Elle bought for me years ago, were already so oversized that I could still fit into them. Everything else, however, had to be packed away in boxes for the time being in order to make room for my maternity clothes. I sighed. I missed my old work clothes. I missed hiding in Hotch’s college shirts. I missed debating what outfit looked professional enough for the office, but was also logistically smart if we had to go into the field with a snap of our fingers. Now, it was just a matter of what was comfortable.

Since Hotch pulled me out of the field a few months ago, the Bureau had officially benched me, too, because I was too much of a liability to be out and about, working on cases. I just wasn’t physically fit to go out chasing bad guys. So, six months pregnant me had to stay behind with Penelope Garcia in her lair of all things Smart. If I showed up in her office with even a single hint of black, she kicked me out until I went to go find something with color on it. She hated blandness. She hated that I liked blandness—especially right now since I just couldn’t fucking fit into anything else. But she was adamant about keeping her office a bright and lively place, so there was one weekend where she dragged me out to the mall to help me find more “Penelope-looking clothes”. However, the purpose of that day spiraled fairly fast. I had gone there for some clothes, meanwhile Garcia had gotten sidetracked and started buying every toy imaginable for the baby.

While I squinted a judgement at her in the checkout line, she got all defensive and said, “You and Hotch are just going to be too busy once my godchild pops out, you won’t have any time to go looking for toys. So, really, I’m doing you all a favor.”

No one had told her that we hadn’t decided on godparents yet. Honestly, I just didn’t know how, and I think Hotch was genuinely terrified of breaking that news to her. So, we decided to keep it on the downlow.

I grabbed the first thing I found in my closet, brought it back out to the bedroom, threw it on the bed, then started changing. Hotch came out of the bathroom to grab his gun from the safe in his bedside table. We had been working on baby proofing the house over the past couple of days. I mean, we always had safes in our drawers for our guns because we still had Jack, a six year old kid, running around. But now we had an extra lock on our bedroom door, we had those stupid plastic gates everywhere to make sure that the baby couldn’t go falling down the steps or something once they started crawling, and we put shitty child locks on the drawers. I really fucking hated it. It felt like we were turning our house into a baby prison. But Hotch insisted that it was the best thing to do, and it was inevitably going to keep the baby safe, so what did I know. At this point, my job was just to sit back and relax while Hotch panicked about everything because I simply did not have the time and energy to be as worried as he was. If it were up to me, I would have just put the crib in our room and called it a day. At least, until they were old enough to move into the nursery.

Still, I didn’t think all of these extra precautions were necessary when the plan was that I would be staying at home for at least three months after the baby was born—way longer than JJ stayed out of the office. Once I was back at work, Jessica offered to spend more time around the house since her job allowed her to do so; but we didn’t think that was necessarily fair to dump on her, so we were debating on whether or not to get a nanny. But that was so far in the future. The point was, our child was going to be watched like a hawk at all times. There wouldn’t be a single chance for anything bad to happen. However, I understood that Hotch was just trying to do what he did best, and that was protecting us. If he felt it was necessary—or even if it just put his mind at ease in a placebo-effect kind of way, I was willing to let him turn our house into a baby prison for the next few years.

Oh, gosh… The next few years…

“Baby,” Hotch spoke louder, like he had been trying to catch my attention before. I snapped out of my train of thought to look at him. “You okay?” he asked, furrowing his brows. I nodded. “You sure?”

“Yeah. I was just lost in thought.”

I moved faster to get dressed. When I was done, I grabbed my gun from my drawer, too, holstering it on my hip, then I went to the bathroom to do my hair, wash my face, and brush my teeth. By the time I was gone, Hotch had woken Jack up and gotten him half-way ready for school. All Jack did these days was wake up, change into new clothes—which Hotch practically had to force him to do—and, if we were lucky, he would brush his hair. The rest of it was just shrugging off our questions. I was starting to worry that it was him acting out because we were a little focused on the baby, when Jack was normally used to getting all of our attention. We knew that this was possible. Older kids who could comprehend that they weren’t going to be an only child now had a tendency to act out like this because they felt like their parents were neglecting them. But I would never do that to Jack. I was trying my damn hardest to spend time with him and make sure he knew that he was still loved and that having a baby brother or sister wasn’t going to change that. He didn’t seem to believe me, though.

“Hey, bud, come on—” Hotch pleaded down the hall. He groaned in annoyance. “Jack. Please. Work with me here.” I heard him slap his hands against his sides like he had thrown his arms up in surrender, then was choosing to walk away from the conversation while worked up and frustrated. I snuck into the hall to see Hotch storming out of Jack’s room. He looked at me as he headed for the stairs. “You can try.” He started stomping downstairs.

I cocked a brow and slowly tiptoed down to Jack’s room, peeking in to see him dressed, but he was cuddled up with Red, our favorite toy dinosaur, on his bed. He was turned towards the wall so that I couldn’t see his face, but I could still tell by his body language that he was sad… He was trying to make it seem like he was mad about something, but he was just… sad…

“Jack?” I cooed, stepping into his room.

“Go away.”

I stopped. “Do you really want me to?”

Sincerely, if he wanted me to go away, I would have. I knew that this was all hard for him, and I knew that letting him feel his emotions was valid—and teaching him that was important. I wouldn’t always leave him alone like that, but sometimes it was better not to pry. If I were really the problem, and if he really wanted me to leave, it would have done more harm than good if I had stayed.

“No,” he whispered regretfully.

I continued approaching him, making my way to the bed until I was sitting on the edge. “What’s going on, little man?”

“Nothing.”

“That’s not true. What happened with Dad?”

“I told him that I didn’t want to go to school, and he got mad.”

“Why don’t you want to go to school?” I asked. Jack didn’t respond. “Huh?” I egged him on while brushing his hair back with my fingers. “Do you want a hug first?”

He nodded, and within an instant, he spun around and sat up, catching my neck in a tight embrace. I wrapped my arms around his torso and held him close. “I just don’t want to go today,” he cried into my shoulder. “Just one day.” He squeezed me tighter until his little arms were straining. “Why did he have to get mad?”

“Because he just wants what’s best for you, bud. He knows that school is good for you. All your friends, your teachers you love, art class, which you love, too. Don’t you want to see Mr. Feechi and show him your cool, new drawing?”

Jack nodded against me.

“Yeah. See? He knows you love it. So, I think he just got confused as to why you don’t want to go. I’m confused why you don’t want to go. Sometimes it’s just hard for him to sit down and talk with people when he gets stressed about a whole bunch of things at once.” I petted his hair and kissed his cheek. “But he still loves you. And I’m sorry he yelled at you. I’ll talk to him about it. But do you want to talk to me about school? About what’s really bothering you?”

“I don’t know… I don’t know why…”

“That’s okay. But it’s not a good enough reason to not go to school.” It was valid if he was sick, or if he needed a mental health day, even. But not going just because he didn’t want to, and not going because he didn’t know why… That wasn’t enough to keep him at home, which would keep me at home, too. “I’m sorry, little man.”

He sniffled and pulled away from me. “Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“You’ll always love me, right?”

I pouted and let out a choked sob as I tried to smile and stay positive for him. How could he ask me something like that? There was nothing he could ever say or do that would make me stop loving him, and there was no way Hotch would ever let me stop loving him in the first place. I loved Jack like he was my own. No. He was my own. He was my son, and he always would be. For the last three years, I got the gift of watching him grow, and his birth parents were kind enough to let me help raise him, too. I’d be forever grateful for that. Since I met Jack all those years ago, he had been my little man. No matter how big he got, he would always be my little man, and that was just a fact and a part of loving him as fervently as I did. He was my son… He was one of the loves of my life.

“Jack,” I brushed his hair back, “I will never, ever stop loving you.” I poked Red’s side. “You and Red are the brightest parts of my day. Whenever I’m scared while off working with Dad, I think about you and Red, and I think about how much I love you, and I know that I’ll be okay. If I ever stopped loving you, I wouldn’t feel okay and safe anymore.”

He moved to hug me again, this time with enough force that sent me back somewhat, making me giggle while catching him. “I love you, too,” he whispered.

After staying like that for a few moments longer, I patted his side and lifted him up onto his feet on the floor so that he could grab his things for school before making our way downstairs. Jack scurried over to his desk without a word. He started shoving everything he needed into the biggest pocket, not at all concerned with organization. How he was mine and Hotch’s kid, I’d never understand. But it certainly brought a smile to my face.

Once we dropped Jack off at school, I fiddled with my fingers as we pulled out of the parking lot in order to head to work. I was beginning to wonder if I made a mistake sending him to school today. Maybe he really just needed the one day. No. One day would turn into two days, and then three, and so on. I couldn’t do that. It wouldn’t’ve been fair to him or me.

“You can’t yell at him like that, Aaron,” I said. He nodded. “You’re going to have to apologize to him tonight.” He nodded again.

Funnily enough, he was never this quiet around me. Usually, Hotch was a very reserved person who didn’t like talking to people unless he had to—and he definitely never opened up to anyone. But I was the exception. He could always talk to me, and he always made sure to be open with me. Therefore, I knew something was off.

I grabbed his right hand from the steering wheel, brought it to my lips, and gently kissed his knuckles. “Baby…” He hummed a questioning tone back to me in response. “What’s going on?”

He sighed as the car slowed at a red light. “I’m worried about Emily, too. I just didn’t know how to tell anyone because it’s my job to worry about you guys, and it’s my responsibility to keep things professional and not pry too far into people’s—”

“Hotch,” I stopped him before he could keep rambling, “it’s okay to be worried about your friend. I’ll talk to her today to figure this all out once and for all.” I kissed his knuckles again. “She’s probably okay.” I turned his hand over and kissed his palm. “I love you.”

He curled his fingers until he was holding my chin. He squeezed as we both smiled. “I love you, too.”

“I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you.”

“You’re silly sometimes,” he teased.

“Only for you, my love.” I kissed his palm roughly before releasing him and turning back to watch the world pass by as we kept driving.

----

When we arrived on the sixth floor of the Quantico building, I meandered over to my desk in the bullpen, slumping and sighing as I did so. There was a picture of Jack sitting prominently on my desk, one that I had kept there since I moved in with him and Aaron a couple years ago, and I updated the photo every so often whenever it would become outdated. Jack was growing so fast. A few months ago, even, he would have never asked me a question like he brought forward that morning. He used to know that I would love him endlessly and unconditionally. Where did I go wrong? This had to be about the baby, right? I mean, he was probably getting worried that Hotch and I might love him less or something like that because we were going to have a baby—and maybe he was old enough now to assume that I would just love our baby more because they would be my own flesh and blood. But that wasn’t true.

Morgan cocked a brow at me from his desk. “Peanut, you okay?”

I nodded and leaned forward to put my computer passcode in. As the system started up, I saw the picture of me, Jack, Hotch, and Jessica together at the park the day Hotch proposed to me. The night before, we promised Jack that we would go on a bike ride together. So, after Hotch proposed to me just after we woke up, and… other things happened… we got up, showered, called Jessica to ask if she wanted to come with us, and the four of us made our way to the park where we biked around for about an hour or so before Jack decided he wanted to play soccer with Hotch. Around lunch time, as Hotch fell onto his back on the grass, and Jack landed on top of him, both of them laughing, I told Jessica what happened. She immediately brightened. She got all giddy and said, “Finally!” before throwing her arms around me. Then, she insisted that we take a family photo. She waved down a random jogger and practically shoved her phone into his hands while she called for Hotch and Jack to come over. We posed, but it was still chaotic. Jack was jumping on his dad for a piggyback ride, and I was trying my best to make sure that neither of them got hurt in the process. It was cute. We were all smiling—laughing, in fact—and it was absolutely genuine. There was nothing forced about the love we all shared for each other. There was nothing fake. I didn’t hate Jack. That photo was a reminder to myself that no matter what he thought of me, or no matter how much he could grow to hate me for one reason or another, I would never stop loving him. As I promised.

“What’s wrong?” Morgan continued to pry.

“Nothing.”

“Mhm. Sure. Try again.”

I rolled my eyes at him since I knew that this meant that he wasn’t going to let it go now. “Jack was having a bad morning, and he asked me if I’ll always love him. It’s just thrown my whole day off balance.”

“I’m about to make it even worse,” JJ said while passing our desks with a stack of case files in her arms.

The entire bullpen—excluding Emily, who seemed to be running late—groaned as we pushed ourselves to our feet and started meandering over to the roundtable room. After last night, I was expecting to talk to Emily before this would happen. I wanted… I wanted to just sort out if I was the problem or not. If I was, I wanted to know how I could mend things between us; and if it wasn’t about me, then what was it about, and how could I help? But, no. She wasn’t there, which was also incredibly unlike her. All of us happened to be late at one point or another. It was inevitable. However, there wasn’t a single day where Emily Prentiss showed up late or called in sick. No matter what was going on in her life, she was always there. Always. So, I was starting to grow even more concerned about her, which I’m sure everyone noticed as we sat down, because I could feel the color draining from my face as I took the seat facing both doors and the windows, just so that I could see her whenever she would come in.

In the meantime, JJ started circling the table while handing out the case files to each of us. When she arrived in front of the monitor once more, she began explaining the case as we knew all of the details to be, while simultaneously clicking the remote in her hand to show the slideshow that had photos from the crime scene—or, in this case, crime scenes.

Late last night, while everyone in D.C. was asleep, two homes were set on fire, killing the families inside. The only connection was the time. The fires took place within the same hour, but that was all. The homes were nowhere near each other—in fact, they were on complete opposite sides of the city. The oddest part, as Morgan noted, was that no one was reporting on this story, which was concerning considering the news ate up and spit out family tragedies like these all the time as if it were fun for them. Two identical fires in one night should have been like chumming the water for them. But nope. That was what caught JJ’s attention in the first place.

First, a couple and their son were found dead in the master bedroom of their home, all three shot through the forehead by the gun that happened to belong to the father. But, then, how did the fire start? Why did the fire start? If it was a murder/suicide, the odds that a house fire would catch shortly after was, at the very least, odd.

Then, the second couple all the way across town, were found dead in their living room after the house exploded due to a suspected gas leak. Still odd. Gas leaks purposefully smell like rotten eggs. If the family was up and doing something with fire—likely cooking—then how did the gas leak go unnoticed? Why didn’t an alarm go off? The report from the fire department in front of me indicated that there was a burglary, fire, and gas alarm in the house. They would have been notified before they could even smell the rotten eggs.

“What are the connections?” I inquired after falling short of noticing one in the files.

JJ shrugged. “There’s only one, and it’s… Well, it’s loose.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means that the only connection between the families comes from the mothers—”

Just then, Emily came running into the boardroom in a rush. Her head was down, but I could see how frazzled she was. She started setting her things down frantically before pausing when she noticed how we were all watching her. “Sorry I’m late,” she apologized while taking her seat.

“Are you okay?” Hotch interrogated.

She shrugged, entirely disregarding his worry. “Yeah. JJ, as you were.”

What the fuck? That wasn’t like her at all. First, she didn’t tease us as she came into the room; then, when asked if everything was alright considering she was late for the first time since joining the team; and then she was formal with JJ. What happened to the Emily Prentiss who cuddled with Jennifer Jareau on the bed at my bachelorette party? What happened to the Emily Prentiss who would try to hide what was really going on with her by teasing me or Morgan—or even Spencer, someone she saw as her little brother. It was all so strange. Her behavior was only making me worry more, and now I could see it on Hotch, Morgan, and Rossi’s faces. Hotch clasped our hands together under the table. That was how bad it was. We had never, ever touched during a roundtable meeting.

“Um…” JJ hesitated, eyeing Emily carefully just like the rest of us. “We were discussing the two crime scenes—”

“I’ll get caught up later. Just keep going.”

JJ scoffed. “Okay.” She rolled her eyes and turned back to the screen. “The only connection comes from the mothers, both of whom were born and raised in Europe.”

“That’s the only connection?” Hotch questioned warily. “That’s not much.”

“It’s all there is.”

Hotch sighed. “Okay… Rossi and Reid, you’ll take the first house. Morgan and Prentiss, head to the second. The rest of us will stay here and start looking through the files again and the families’ histories to see if we can find any other connection. There has to be something.” He released my hand, picked up his things from the table, stood, then quickly and quietly left the room.

Everyone started following his lead. Garcia and JJ immediately scurried off to Garcia’s office. Rossi and Reid turned for the back door that led to the ramp next to the break room, while Morgan and Emily moved for the front door that led to the bullpen. Before she could escape, however, I stepped just in front of her path, and threw my hands up in surrender so that she couldn’t get mad at me. She sighed and rolled her eyes. Wow. Was I really that bad? Whatever it was that was clearly going on in her life, was it really so bad that she had to take it out on me, the one person who had enough love for her to straight up confront her about what was going on instead of hiding like Hotch and Rossi were in their offices.

“Em, what’s going on with you?” I questioned sincerely. She didn’t say or do anything. “Can we talk somewhere privately?”

“I’m busy. Maybe later.” She pushed past me, barely brushing my shoulder like she still had enough decency to not actually harm me.

Fucking ridiculous. This was all so out of character for her, and she wasn’t letting anyone in to help her. Honestly, it was beginning to get on my nerves. Whenever I was in her shoes, something was going wrong in my life and I was bottling it up and taking out my frustrations on everyone else, Emily was the one person who could knock some sense into me. At least, that was what she had done after JJ pissed me off in New York. She looked me in the eye and said, “Screw them, Y/N. You don’t need anyone’s opinion but your own and Hotch’s.” Where was that Emily? That was the very same Prentiss that I knew and loved, and was going to be— No. That thought was for another time.

Garcia and JJ came back in, this time carrying laptops and stacks of files almost as tall as them. I hated desk duty. Absolutely fucking despised it. Hotch knew that I didn’t like being benched, he knew that it was hard for me to just sit around and do nothing while the team was out there getting a good look at the crime scenes and risking their lives. I should have been out there with them. I should have been by Morgan’s side, ready to jump in front of him if I had to; or I should have been with Emily so that I could get a read on what was really wrong with her. Honestly, at that point, I was even willing to go with Rossi and Reid, the two people on the team I hardly worked with. But, no. I had to be holed up all day in the office, and it was draining.

I had to grin and bear it, however, by taking a stack of files for myself and start flipping through all of them. Normally, I would be out there in the field, giving Reid a chance to stay back to read a mile a minute. I wished that were the case still. Between the three of us, it was going to take until at least lunch time to get through all of this information. Reid would have finished all of them on his own in, like, ten minutes— maximum.

Everything about the two families involved with these incidents were just as the cops and JJ described: Ordinary. They were all healthy, fit, and happy. There was no financial stress. No therapy bills or doctors visits outside of yearly physical checkups. Even their schedules were ordinary. Both parents went to work while the children went to school. However, the children went to different schools—one private and one public—and one was succeeding while the other was practically failing.

Their lives were as perfect as could be, which was in fact the one thing that was most suspicious.

“Hold on…” Garcia mumbled under her breath as she started typing on her loud keyboard faster. “Woah, woah, woah.”

“What is it?” I asked.

She pushed her seat back, grabbed her chair, then started speed walking out of the room. JJ and I shared a curious look. After a moment, I decided to chase after her. She was headed straight towards Hotch’s office, but he was actually coming out in order to meet us in the boardroom to see if we had come up with anything.

“So, something happened,” Garcia began as we approached Hotch on the balcony. He kept walking, so we followed. “No one’s talking about this. Still. Except for one guy who I caught attempting to post the article, but then it was pulled almost immediately—not before I could catch it, though.” She sounded so proud of herself.

“What do you want from me, Garcia?” he asked.

“With your permission, sir, I would like to track him down to see why it was that he pulled the article as soon as he posted it. Something’s fishy about all of this. Someone should have reported on this by now. Actually, there should have been a whole media blow up—pardon the pun—by now. I think he might know something about why there’s been complete radio silence on this.”

“Do it.”

“I’ll go to help you question him,” I offered. Garcia was tech savvy and extremely snippy and sassy, but she didn’t know how to profile. She could give us our in with this guy, but I could actually get information out of him. Garcia seemed to agree. She nodded and looked to Hotch hopefully, as did I.

“You can track him down and question him yourself, Garcia,” he said, half paying attention as he unpacked his papers to set them out on the table.

“Hotch—” I tried arguing. “That’s not fair—”

“Here and the house. Remember? That was the deal. It could be just the house, if you’re not careful.”

The whole room fell silent. Tension hung in the air as Hotch and I stared each other down. Just a few months ago, I promised Hotch that when the time would come, I would pull myself out of the field, and I wouldn’t throw a fit about it. I did that. But it wouldn’t hurt to drive down to the local newspaper to ask a journalist a few questions. This was a little too much. The deal was that I could go to the office, as long as I didn’t go into the field. Staying in town wasn’t “going into the field”. He had to budge on this. Right?

“No,” he finally said sternly.

I sighed and sat down, keeping my eyes away from him as everyone cautiously started moving back towards conversing about the case. That was incredibly embarrassing. For years, Hotch and I didn’t show affection at work, we didn’t argue like an old married couple, and we certainly didn’t bring up our deals or agreements in front of everyone. We didn’t discuss the fact that we made rules to not touch in front of people, or say “I love you” when the others were around. We didn’t talk about how we promised to never lie to each other. And we certainly didn’t talk about how we made a deal that I would only stay at the house or at the office. No one knew that. Since that day at the Park Rangers’ office, that had been our secret deal, and I wanted it to fucking stay that way; yet Hotch had the audacity to bring it up in front of the entire team. Not only was I frustrated about the situation he had stuck me in, but I was also frustrated with my husband now.

“I, um,” Morgan cleared his throat uncomfortably. “I think I might have something here.” He handed the file he had been looking through over to Hotch. “Both of the mothers coached their sons’ soccer teams out on the Hill. They probably met that way.”

Reid shuffled from Gideon’s couch in the corner to the table we were all sitting around. “I found another connection, too. It’s in their phone records. Both moms, who happened to be from Europe and coached their sons’ soccer teams on the Hill, as Morgan mentioned, called the same number multiple times.”

“Give it to me,” Garcia said. After Reid read the phone number aloud, Garcia started digging through the identity of whoever it was that owned that number. “Byron Delaney—He’s British.” She stopped typing immediately.

Hotch looked at Morgan. “Go.”

Morgan got up and raced to the bullpen to tell Emily where they were headed and who it was they were visiting. Within the next minute or so, Hotch’s phone started ringing, causing him to sigh under his breath, collect his things again, and leave to take the call out in his office. The rest of us settled in our seats and started looking for a way to contact that reporter Garcia had talked about. I even decided to spend some time reaching out to newspapers as an “anonymous source” looking to give them an inside scoop on the story just to see if anyone would bite. Nothing. Everyone got back to me in the next thirty minutes or so just to tell me that the story wasn’t interesting enough for them to pursue. That was utter bullshit. Something was seriously wrong with this case, and the only one who could give us any answers was the reporter Garcia was hunting down.

“Where are Hotch and Rossi going?” JJ asked, looking through the windows of the roundtable room to see the two of them hauling ass out of the office.

We all shrugged.

Two minutes later, Hotch was calling Garcia to let her know what was going on. “Emily and Morgan were shot at by the Unsubs.”

“What?!” I exclaimed. How could he not tell us that immediately? “Are they alright?”

“They’re fine. They found Byron’s body. Dave and I are headed there now to case the scene with them. We’ll call with what we know later.” He hung up before I could argue with him, which he knew I would.

The worry was starting to fuck with my head and my body. A headache was brewing, meanwhile my stomach was starting to ache to the point I felt like I was going to throw up. At first, I tried ignoring it. I closed my eyes to stop the headache and to focus on my breathing, but that didn’t work. So, I tried rocking back and forth gently. However, it only seemed to get worse the longer we sat there in silence, worrying about Morgan and Emily.

“Fuck…” I cursed under my breath. “Not now, baby… Come on, just give me a few more hours.”

“Y/N?” Reid questioned me from across the table. I glanced up at him through my lashes to see that he was watching me hold my stomach, rocking back and forth lightly, trying to control my breathing. “What is it?”

“The baby’s just kicking. That’s all.”

He narrowed his eyes at me and closed the file in front of him. “You look like you’re in pain.”

I searched his eyes. There was no way in hell he was going to give this up, but if I told him the truth, he would tell Hotch, and then that would just cause more problems than was necessary. “I’m fine.” I saw that Garcia was also eyeing me suspiciously now. “Please, just don’t tell Hotch. I swear, it’s nothing. I’m just not feeling well.”

“We’re supposed to tell Hotch if anything—”

“No. Please.”

Garcia was slowly tapping on her keyboard, trying not to draw my attention. Her sloth-like pace was exactly what caught my eye, though. “Sorry…” she apologized quietly. “I had to.”

I sighed and threw my papers on the table. “I’ll get my things.”

“Why?” Reid asked.

“Hotch’s gonna make me go home.” I stood. “Fuck—” I grabbed onto the table for balance. “Shit…” My stomach ached like I was being stabbed. I let out a shaky breath. “Okay, fine… Someone get Anderson to drive me home.”

Reid stood and raced out of the boardroom to go find Anderson while I slowly made my way down to my desk to get my things. I collected my purse and threw my phone and badge in it. Within the next minute or so, Anderson approached, letting me know that Reid had tracked him down to take me home. I thanked him quickly. The stomach aches had passed, but I knew that they would inevitably return. If I was heading home, I wasn’t coming back. At least not today.

On our way out, I beckoned Garcia over quickly to tell her that even though I was going home, I wanted constant updates, and if there were any new developments, I wanted her to video call me with everything. She agreed. While she was practically pushing me towards the elevator, she said that she would put me on calls with the team, send me texts with small details, video call me for dozens of other things. Since I was going home because they let up the game to Hotch, it was the least they could do.

In the car, Anderson played the radio and we talked about his girlfriend. Her name was Angelica. They met shortly after the Fisher King case when he began attending group therapy to help him cope with the guilt he felt for what happened to Elle. I interrupted to tell him that none of it was his fault. While he sent me a short smile and thanked me for the personal reassurance, I could tell that he still wasn’t convinced; but it didn’t matter. Talking about Angelica made his whole face brighten. He was grinning ear to ear, his eyes sparkling in the sun as he focused on the road, and he was tapping his fingers against the steering wheel in time with the beat of the music. I smiled to myself. It was so odd that I had been working with people like him—people in the broader spectrum of the BAU—for years, and yet I hardly knew anything about them. Sometimes I would consider Anderson a friend, but it was just… It was different being friends with him compared to being friends with Morgan and Emily. I knew practically everything about Morgan, and I knew as much as Emily was willing to tell me, but I didn’t know much about Anderson. It felt wrong. Somehow, it irked me that I could be working in the same office as him for so long, and yet I never stopped to ask him how his day was going, or if he was seeing anyone, or if he was okay since everything happened with Elle.

“Do you ever wish you could see her again?” Anderson inquired. I didn’t understand what he was asking. “Elle.”

Oh. I couldn’t tell him that I had seen her somewhat recently, or that I didn’t care if I saw her again or not, as shitty as it sounded. Since she first left, all I wanted was to see her again and get answers from her. Only, when I did see her again, she felt like an entirely different person, and I didn’t get a single real answer out of her. So, no. I didn’t wish that I could ever see her again, but Anderson didn’t need to know that.

“Sometimes,” I answered, then I turned to stare out the window silently.

By the time he dropped me off at my house, my phone was ringing with a FaceTime from Garcia. Anderson was already driving around the corner down the block when I answered while simultaneously digging out my house keys. As I unlocked the door, I saw Penelope’s face on the screen.

“What do you have for me, lovely?” I asked.

“We have a name—a potential suspect,” Garcia said.

“What does that mean?”

“His name’s Ian Doyle, and we think that he might be operating on a list of people who took him down seven years ago.”

“Why?”

“Because all but three of the people on that list are dead.”

I stopped in my tracks as I entered the house. “Who are the other three?”

“We don’t know. The CIA and Interpol are giving Hotch a hard time confirming identities. They only just told us that our victims matched the team of profilers that had taken Doyle down. I don’t know when we’ll get the name of the other three agents.”

“Hotch will get the names. I know he will.” I set my things down and wandered to get a TUMS and Motrin for my stomach and headache. “Call me when you know more.”

“Of course, my love. Get some sleep. You look pale.” She kissed the pads of her index and middle fingers, then pressed them to her camera before hanging up on me.

I set my phone down on the counter so that I could pour out one pill from the TUMS bottle and the Motrin bottle. When I had them resting in my palm, I turned to grab a glass from the cupboard and fill it with water. When I was finished with the Motrin, I carried the water and my phone with me upstairs as I began chewing on the big TUMS pill that was slowly dissolving in my mouth. By the time I landed in bed, the pill was gone, and I was already falling asleep. Just a few minutes. I would wake up soon...

----

As my eyes fluttered open, I could see that the sun was setting over the houses in the neighborhood. I jolted upright and checked the time. Shit. Shit, shit, shit. I slept for three hours. Fuck. I reached to grab my phone to see that there were no calls or texts from anyone on the team. I didn’t understand. I had been MIA for three hours. How had Garcia not checked up on me? How did Hotch not call to see if I was feeling alright? What the fuck was he really going on? I tried calling Hotch, but it went to voicemail. My face fell.

That was when I heard something clatter in the dining room. I jumped in my own skin, the sound echoing throughout the house sending me back to that day when I was taken in Hawai’i. Hotch wasn’t picking up the phone, and now it sounded like someone was in the house. Maybe it was just Hotch? Maybe he picked up Jack from soccer early, and they were downstairs setting up dinner? Yeah. Maybe. I could only know for sure by making my way downstairs slowly, holding onto the railing to make sure I didn’t lose my footing. My heat was still hurting, but the baby had calmed down, so my stomach wasn’t aching and cramping anymore. Thankfully.

I stumbled to a halt when I saw Jessica and Jack sitting at the dining room table, eating spaghetti and garlic bread. She had a glass of water and wine, meanwhile Jack was chugging down a large glass of chocolate milk that he ended up refilling with the jug next to him once he was out. I smiled. Chocolate milk was his “thing” right now. For the longest time, it was mac and cheese—and, of course, he would never pass up the chance to have a bowl of it, but it was “chocolate milk this” and “chocolate milk that” nowadays. Eventually, Hotch and I were going to have to trick him out of it. If it became an unhealthy obsession, I’d find one way or another to get him to start drinking iced tea or something like his dad.

Jessica looked up to see me standing in the doorway. “Hey! You’re up.” I smiled and nodded. “Did you sleep well?”

“Yeah…” I searched the table with my eyes, trying to piece together how long she had been with Jack. “How did you…” I chuckled to myself.

“Aaron called to tell me you weren’t feeling well, so I came over to watch Jack.” She picked up her glass of wine. “I would’ve warned you, but I saw that you were sleeping and I didn’t want to wake you.”

“It’s all good.” I walked over to the table before kissing the top of Jack’s head. “How was school, little man?”

“Boring,” he answered behind a full mouth of spaghetti noodles.

At least it wasn’t bad, and at least he wasn’t sending any signal that he didn’t want to go back tomorrow. If he would have still been as upset as he was that morning, I would have considered letting him stay home tomorrow. Tomorrow… I realized that I didn’t even know where I would be tomorrow given the fact that I had already missed so much of the case. I was feeling a thousand times better already, but Hotch probably wasn’t going to accept that, and I really wasn’t looking to pick a fight with him about it again, and I wasn’t willing to hear Morgan, Rossi, or Emily take his side on the matter.

“Did you show Mr. Feechi your art?”

“I forgot.”

I chuckled and kissed the top of his head again. Forgetting to show his art to his teacher probably meant that he was caught up in a million other things like schoolwork or friends, and either option was ideal to me, so I was content with that answer, truth be told. At least he looked and sounded better now. Compared to this morning, he was acting like my little man again as I knew him, the slurping spaghetti noodles really bringing the whole thing together. I smiled to myself.

“I’m gonna check in with the team,” I said to Jessica. “I’ll be back in a bit.”

She shrugged and nodded understandingly. “Take your time.”

As I headed back upstairs to the bedroom, I sighed and wiped my palms over my face in an attempt to wake myself up. I hadn’t meant to fall asleep earlier. Considering I gave Garcia so much shit earlier for snitching on me, and I begged her to stay in touch because of it, the least I could have done was stay awake in order to receive her calls. Then again, I was feeling much better now that I was well rested. Give and take, I suppose.

I grabbed my phone from my bedside table and dialed Garcia’s number. The call rang a worrisome amount of times before going to voicemail. That was unusual… I cocked a brow at my phone as I dialed Hotch’s number this time around. Garcia normally picked up because she was sitting at her desk—or at least she had one of her many phones on her to alert her that someone was calling. Why hadn’t she answered?

And then I heard Hotch pick up. I let out a relieved sigh and let my palm rest over my stomach. “Hey,” I said.

“Hey,” he responded, sounding a little out of breath and extremely preoccupied.

“Is everything okay? Garcia didn’t—”

“We’re fine, baby. We’re just about to give the profile, so we’re all running around right now. Can I call you back later when we’re done?”

I hesitated. “Yeah…” I looked over my shoulder to glance at his side of the bed which was uncomfortably empty. “Are you coming home tonight?”

“Probably not.”

“Oh…”

Hotch stopped and sighed heavily. “I’m so sorry, baby. I know that this isn’t what you want. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. Just be safe. Call me after the profile and catch me up.”

“I will. I love you, Y/N.”

I smiled against my phone. “I love you, too.”

He hung up on me before anything else could be said.

----

Jack tried staying up with me as long as he could. After Jessica had left for the night, the two of us crashed on the couch to watch a movie, but he ended up spending more time focusing on my stomach than anything else. He found it fascinating. I mean, he was a kid, so he didn’t necessarily understand what was happening, but he knew that his baby brother or sister was in there. When I told him that the baby was kicking, Jack started freaking out. He thought I was dying. I laughed at him and told him that it was alright while placing his hand over my stomach so that he could feel it. “Ew,” was his response as he snatched his hand away. I chuckled again and explained that it was natural. “I still hate it,” he said, scurrying to the other side of the couch. At least his fascination with poking my stomach was gone now.

By the time the movie reached the credits, Jack was asleep and snoring. We had been waiting to see if Hotch would show up or call, but there was no word. So, I leaned over, and I combed Jack’s hair with my fingers while kissing his temple until he slowly stirred awake. I whispered that it was time to go to bed. Since I couldn’t carry him, tired, little Jack had to roll off the couch, then lazily stomp across the house in front of me as we ever so slowly made our way upstairs one step at a time. Jack crashed onto his bed and fell back to sleep immediately.

I smiled and leaned down to kiss his forehead. “Night, my little man.”

“Night…” he whispered, then rolled over to face the wall.

As I left his room, I closed the door quietly behind me to make sure that there weren’t any creaks, and that the sound of the doorknob wouldn’t wake him up. When the coast was clear, I let out a deep breath. That was when my phone started ringing. I jumped slightly at the sudden noise that shook the house, and probably woke Jack up.

I cursed under my breath while hurrying down to mine and Hotch’s room while answering the phone. The call was from Hotch. Finally. “Hey, babe.”

“Hey,” he responded with a hint of worry.

I froze and cocked a brow. What was wrong? Something was definitely fucking wrong, and he couldn’t lie his way out of it in order to make sure I wouldn’t come back in. Whatever it was, if it was bad enough, I would go back in. So, help me, if he wasn’t okay, I was going to race there, honking the horn at every goddamn car in my way.

“What is it?”

“Have you seen Emily?”

“No. Why?”

“It’s nothing,” he insisted quickly. “I’ll call you back—”

“No. Aaron Christopher Hotchner, you tell me what’s going on right fucking now, or so help me.”

He sighed heavily. He was still reluctant to admit whatever it was, but I wasn’t going to back down. He promised that he would call after the profile, yet he didn’t, and now he was calling to ask if I knew where Emily was, which meant that the team didn’t, which meant that something horrible— “She’s the last person on Ian Doyle’s list.”

“What? And you let her out of your sight? Aaron!”

“It wasn’t our fault. We didn’t know, Y/N. We think she ran in order to protect all of us, because she thinks she can handle this on her own.”

“Of course she does. She’s always been like that. She’s been acting so fucking weird, Hotch,” I said, hiding my face in my hand, “we should’ve talked to her sooner. Fuck…”

“Y/N, please, if you start panicking, it could be bad for the baby—”

“I’m coming back in.” I knew that argument was going to come about. I knew the second I heard his voice that something was bad enough that he needed to call me, and if it got to that point, I should just come in.

Hotch sounded angry when saying, “No.”

“Emily’s our family. I’m coming in to help find her. And Doyle.”

“Y/N, no.”

“Yes. I’m already on my way, Hotch. I’ll be okay. I’ll bring medication, a go-bag, and I’ll sleep on the couch in your office if I need more rest. But I’m not abandoning Emily. She’s our family.”

“That’s exactly why she left in the first place. Y/N, she left a gift in the drawer of her desk with her phone and badge. It’s addressed to you.”

I stopped in my tracks. “What?”

“There’s a letter attached to it, too.”

“What does it say?”

“I haven’t opened either of them.”

“Open them,” I demanded. “They might be something important!”

“I need to have the bomb squad check it first,” he answered quietly, and almost regretfully. I cocked a brow. What the fuck did that mean? “Doyle’s getting desperate. It could be part of his plan. If I open it now, it might—”

“Okay. Fine. Just… I’ll do it when I get there…” I grabbed a go-bag from the closet and started shoving clothes, medication, toiletries, etc. in there without a single care in the world. “We have to bring her back, Aaron,” I whispered almost helplessly, almost as if the message wasn’t really for him but for me and my conscience. “We have to.”

“I know.” He sounded just as helpless as I was.

I stayed on the phone with him the entire time as I texted Jessica to let her know what was happening, and then I got in my car that was parked in the garage in case we ever needed it for situations like this. My hands were shaking against the wheel as I drove. How could Emily do this? How could she just run instead of staying with us and trusting that we could help her? I didn’t understand how she could possibly think that she was better off on her own than with her family. I didn’t understand why she felt like she couldn’t come to me. Ian Doyle was why she had been pushing me away. All this time, she knew that he was coming after her, and instead of utilizing us, she abandoned us. As angry as I wanted to be, I was just anxious. I was worried sick. If I hadn’t been concerned earlier about Morgan and Emily, I didn’t know what to call this. I hadn’t felt this way since Hotch was all alone as he went to go face off against Foyet and I had to count the seconds until we could get there to give him back up.

When I got to the office, Hotch was waiting at the front door for me, the phone pressed to his ear because he stayed on the call with me all the way until I was standing just in front of him. I crashed my face into his chest. I didn’t care that we had our rules about being intimate at work, or that Cody, the Director, was walking past us as I did so. I didn’t care. The only thing that could calm me down again was being in my husband’s arms, feeling the way his abs under his shirt flexed against my torso, and how his long arms could hold me close while his hot breath floated over the top of my head.

“I still haven’t opened them,” he whispered to me, “but the bomb squad cleared them, and a tox report on the envelope came back negative.

I took his hand in mine, letting him take my go-bag in his other hand so that I wouldn’t have to carry it. We walked together inside. Security was different at night. We usually knew the team working the front desk during the day since we would welcome them every morning when we would come in for work, but we hardly ever saw the night team. I mean, if we were still at the office at night, that meant that we were there until the sun came up, just as the morning security team was coming in. But not this time around. Everything felt so foreign with Emily gone in the wind, and the different, unwelcoming faces at the front desk and standing at the metal detectors didn’t help.

When we made it up to the sixth floor, I could see the team standing up in the roundtable room, working together to tape photos and maps up on the walls to organize all of their evidence and get a new perspective on everything. Hotch led me the opposite direction, though. He led me straight to his office where he dropped my go-bag on the couch, then walked over to his desk where the box and letter were sitting, just as he promised. He didn’t touch them. He just turned to face me while gesturing towards them.

“Do you want me to stay?” he inquired. I shook my head. If it was addressed to me, I wanted to see it all for myself first, and then I would take it to the team if need be. “Okay.” As he started walking out, he wrapped his right arm around my hips before kissing my cheek lightly. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” I croaked.

He left before anything else could be said or he could change his mind about leaving me alone for this part. His hand drifted off my waist, my fingers trying to tangle with his all the way until he was out of reach. My hand fell to my side. When it was just me in the room, I turned back to the box and the letter. I swallowed hard. I didn’t want to know what was in there. I didn’t want to know what it was that Emily could have possibly left for me now. I didn’t want this to be the last thing I would ever get from her.

I slowly moved to sit down in one of the chairs in front of Hotch’s desk. After staring at the packaging for a moment, I decided to take the box in my hands and start carefully tearing at the wrapping. As the box opened, I saw what it was that she had left for me. A choked back sob escaped me. I smiled as I lifted it out of the box and held it close to my chest. Emily’s favorite animal was a koala. We always joked that if we had left her in charge of putting together the nursery, she would have ended up decorating the whole place with koalas. Never in a million years, however, did I anticipate that she would do this.

I squeezed the stuffed animal koala bear against my chest as tight as I could, as if I were giving it a Superman hug. After everything, the last thing she wanted to do—the last thing she wanted to give us before leaving—was a goddamn stuffed koala bear. I was going to give her so much shit when I would see her again. She could have given us anything. Scotch for Hotch, cigars for Rossi, a book for Reid, something with butterflies for JJ, something small and adorable for Penelope’s desk; but, nope. She chose to leave this for me. Why?

I leaned forward to grab the letter and pull it out of the envelope. It was her handwriting, alright. Ian Doyle couldn’t have forged anything like it, that was for sure, though Reid would probably still want to verify it himself at some point.

“Y/N, if you’re reading this, then you know by now that I’ve left. You know that I had to run in order to protect all of you. You also know that I would never do this unless I thought it was absolutely crucial. Doyle is coming after me. He’s been threatening the team and your family for three months, and I couldn’t tell you because he was going to kill you, and I just can’t let anyone die because of me. I can’t let you lose your family because of me. I know that there’s a chance that I won’t make it… That Doyle will win, and I’ll never get a chance to meet your son or daughter. If that’s the case, then I want them to have this and to know that it came from me. I want them to know that I love them, even if I didn’t get to hold them in my arms. I want them to know that I left in order to save them, and to save their family because they deserve to grow up with a mom, a dad, a brother, and a group of aunts and uncles that love them more than anything. I want you to know that I love you. Joining this team was the greatest gift of my life, but getting to know you and work with you in the field every day is my greatest blessing. You’ve come so far. You’ve grown, learned, suffered, and succeeded. I don’t know anyone like you, and I doubt that I’ll ever meet anyone else like you. You’re special, Y/N. Your son or daughter is going to be special, too; I just know it. More than anything in the world, I wish I could be there to tell you that it’s all going to be alright, but I really don’t know if that’s true. I want to meet your child, and I’m so ready to see the amazing person they grow up to be because they have the most amazing parents. Things just don’t turn out how we expect sometimes. Life gets in the way. Love and suffering gets in the way. I know me asking you and the team to not come looking for me is futile, but I hope that you understand that if you do come looking for me, I can’t guarantee everyone’s safety, so for that very reason, I’m going to ask that none of you follow me. This is my battle to fight. On my own. No one else needs to get hurt because of things I did in my past. I love you, Y/N. I love Hotch. I love Jack. I love your baby. I’m sorry. Emily.”

I folded the paper slowly before setting it down on the desk in front of me. Just when my hands were free, I immediately hid my face in my palms as I started to sob. That wasn’t fair of her. She didn’t get to do this to me. She didn’t get to just run away and say goodbye, never giving me the chance to say goodbye, too.

The team was going to want answers.

So, I wiped as many tears away as I could manage while putting the stuffed koala back in the box and hiding it under Hotch’s desk before grabbing the letter then heading out of his office. As the door closed behind me, I let out a shaky breath. Anderson, Gina, and a few secretaries were mulling about in the bullpen, completely unaware of what was happening. The team was going to take it hard; I knew that. But the rest of them in the office were going to have a hard time with it, too. I didn’t want to have to tell any of them. I didn’t want to have to face the truth.

I took one brave step towards the roundtable room, trying my best not to draw attention to myself. And then I took another. Every time I let out a breath and moved one step closer, I felt the task become easier. I still dreaded it, but at least it was a mindless endeavor now as I moved across the balcony.

As I walked into the boardroom, I saw all of the pictures and maps that the team had been taping up as Hotch was leading me to his office only a few minutes ago. I was so naïve then. I didn’t know the contents of the box or the letter, and I didn’t know what it was that they had all been hanging up and inspecting for the sake of the case. There were photos of Emily everywhere, but she looked so different. Her hair was brown instead of black, it was curly instead of straight, and she had soft bangs instead of harsh and dramatic ones— and her hair was just… longer. She didn’t look like the Emily I had known for the past three years. Then again, I was slowly starting to learn that I didn’t know her at all, and that the Emily I knew and loved was simply a facade, just as she was in those pictures hanging on the wall. She was smiling in those pictures while holding Doyle’s hand. In others, she was smiling against his lips, their fingers tangled in each other’s hair. I shook my head. She was a stranger to us. All this time, we trusted and loved her, and yet we didn’t really know anything about her. She was going to have to explain a lot when she would get back.

I was broken out of my trance when I heard the team arguing about whether or not what Emily had done undercover was moral or not. She sold Doyle weapons. She slept with him. From the looks of it, she even fell in love with him. Was that a part of the plan, or was that who Emily really was?

“It doesn’t make any sense,” Reid insisted with a hint of a whine buried behind his words. “We’re her family. We could have helped her…”

I threw the letter on the table. “Doyle’s been killing families. She ran so that he wouldn’t come after us. She’s leading him away.” Everyone glanced over at me, their faces falling as they saw how red and teary eyes I was, and how I was melted down to sniffles and quiet sobs now.

Reid stretched across the table to pick up the letter. Boy genius could have read the letter in its entirety in less than two seconds, if my math was correct, yet he kept hesitating on every other word, forcing him to practically start over every time his eyes fogged up too far with tears or he lost his train of thought.

“She doesn’t want us to go after her…” he croaked. “How could she ask that of us?”

“Because it’s too dangerous,” Hotch said.

“Her messes are our messes, though. That’s part of being a family,” I whispered. I looked around at all of them. “We have to help her.” Morgan’s gaze fell to the ground. “Derek, please… You know we have to.”

“Morgan, in the morning, you and Rossi will head to Prentiss’ apartment to see if you can find anything to tell us where she went,” Hotch continued as calmly as he could. “In the meantime, let’s get Y/N caught up to speed.”

I sent him a quick look that asked if he was really going to let me pursue this, if he was actually going to let me into the field for this. He nodded. My whole body relaxed in response, a behavioral way to thank him for knowing what I needed and giving in without starting an argument.

Everyone sat down and settled. Hotch cleared his throat. “This is personal. And I know that we’re not supposed to ever let it get personal, so… If it’s ever too much for any of you, it’s okay to take a step back.” No one seemed to be listening to him. All of us just wanted to dive straight into it so that we could catch up to Emily as fast as possible. Hotch caught the hint. “Okay.” He gestured to JJ to give him the clicker for the TV, and once she did, he began speaking. “My friend from… Well, from higher places, gave me this information about Lauren Reynolds. She was apart of a secret group working under Interpole, the CIA, and a dozen other organizations where they profiled terrorists around the world. Their last target was Ian Doyle.” He put a picture of Doyle up on the board. It was the first time I had ever seen this man’s face straight on compared to just his cheek as he was hugging or kissing Emily in any one of the photos up on the walls. “Emily had gone undercover as an arms dealer named Lauren Reynolds. Her mission was to get close enough to Doyle in order to build a stronger profile. Her undercover work, along with the entire team’s profile is what finally took him down. Jeremy Wolff was Doyle’s first victim in this spree.” He pulled up a photo of Jeremy. “He was murdered while on a morning run. His fiancé, Tsia Mosely was the victim Morgan and Prentiss found last night.”

“That was Em’s trigger to leave,” Garcia gasped.

“Clyde Easter was the leader of the profiling task force. He had come to D.C. a couple of days ago with Tsia, but after her murder last night, he ran. My friends in those higher places have already put him on the TSA’s watch list.”

“How close did Prentiss and Doyle get, though?” Rossi scoffed while looking at one of the pictures of them kissing passionately.

I shook my head and looked down.

Hotch didn’t seem to want to talk about it either. So, he instead opted to say, “Doyle fell madly in love with her. That was how they ultimately took him down.”

“Does he know that?” JJ asked.

“I would assume so.”

“That’s why he’s leaving her for last…” I whispered while running my hands over my stomach to ignore the stomachache that was slowly but surely returning.

Morgan stormed out of the room, deciding that he didn’t want to sit around long enough to hear all of this while also doing nothing. If anything, he was probably headed to go to Emily’s apartment already. Rossi stood, too, just when he put the pieces together. We all sighed and fell quiet, considering just how bad things were getting, and the fact that they could get much worse soon if we weren’t faster.

----

After Morgan and Rossi came back, they met with us in the roundtable room to discuss what it was that they had found at Emily’s apartment. Yesterday, while I was at home resting and they found Tsia’s body, Emily threw up outside, then asked Morgan to drive her home so that she could change clothes. What Morgan failed to recognize at the time was that she was packing up a go-bag so that she could leave when the time was right. But she left her safe open. Not that it was a mistake or that she was being careless, but because she knew that we were going to try to follow after her, and she was only giving us what she wanted us to know. She had tried to flush the golden necklace in Rossi’s hand, but he had spotted it just before they decided to head back to the office.

It was a Gimmel ring— a Gaelic-made wedding ring where the husband and wife’s rings would be worn separately during the engagement, then, for the wedding, they would be molded together to represent their unity. The one hanging from the chain in Rossi’s hand was already molded together. He handed it to me so that I could inspect it further. Immediately, I took to the detail of the different Gaelic marking on both rings, and how they certainly meant something in Gaelic—something only Spencer Reid himself could translate, so I passed the necklace to him. He examined it closely, too. While he was busy, I crossed my arms over my chest, shrugged, and asked what this had to do with anything. Certainly, it was just her parents’ old wedding rings, or perhaps her grandparents’. Emily was never married prior. We would have known if she were ever married.

“Ian was—” Rossi began.

“Shit—” Reid threw the necklace on the table angrily before I could get an answer from someone. We all turned to face him. He gestured to the rings, “They have Ian and Emily’s names on them.”

“As I was saying,” Rossi continued cautiously, “Doyle was part of the Irish Mob… The running theory Morgan and I had on the way over here was that it belonged to Doyle. We didn’t know that Emily was… Well, we didn’t realize… I…” He chuckled to himself and how outrageous the situation was. Did we really not know anything about her?

“Doyle ran his operations out of Boston,” Morgan said quietly from the corner. He was sitting down, unlike the rest of us, and he was staring at the closed Ian Doyle file Hotch had gotten from his friends in “higher places”. When we all turned to him, that was his cue to continue. “That was where he and Emily met.” He looked at me. “It’s important to both of them. If he’s not in D.C. anymore, which I doubt he is, he probably scurried back to what he knows, which is Boston. And since Emily wasn’t going to let him bring the fight to us, she probably ran to take the fight to him.” He slid the file away from himself like he didn’t want to stare at it any longer.

“As usual, my slice of chocolate cake is correct,” Garcia said, turning into the boardroom with a laptop in her hands, racing over to the table as if she could hear what we were talking about from across the office. “TSA just got a hit on one of Clyde Easter’s covers. He’s on his way to Boston.”

My jaw fell slightly in shock. “He probably had the same thought we did. He knows Emily just as well as we do, but he knows Doyle better. He knew that they were likely in Boston.”

“It confirms Morgan’s theory,” Hotch agreed. “Garcia, have him detained the second he gets off that plane. We’ll interrogate him when we get there.”

“Yes, sir,” she said.

“And, you’re coming with us.”

She looked up at him suddenly, uncertainty written all over her face. “Okay. Yeah. Sure.”

As she began contacting TSA again, we all headed to grab our go-bags and get ready to head for the jet. Hotch and I headed to his office. He had some extra clothes stored away in a drawer, so he carefully grabbed them to make sure they would stay folded, then slid them into his bag. I sat down at his desk to look at Emily’s gift again. The box was just staring at me. It was as if it were saying to me: “She’s already dead. You’re too late. There’s nothing you can do.” I sniffled and wiped my face clean with my palms. Hotch, from where he was standing opposite me, took notice of my behavior, yet he didn’t say anything, probably because he didn’t know what to say. If anything, he was just as panicked as I was, as frustrated as Morgan, as desperate as Reid and JJ; he just showed it differently.

On the jet, however, that was another story. Everyone sat down for takeoff, and Hotch held my hand the entire time. Even though I wasn’t scared of flying on the jet anymore, there were times when there were personal stakes involved when he needed to hold me and rub his thumb over my knuckles, and even kiss my cheek once. I melted into his touch. I turned to face him, both of us relaxing with our eyes closed, and I kissed him gently.

Once we were in the air, he tugged at my hand. “I have something to give you.” He pulled me to my feet and led me past the team, then, when there was some remnants of privacy, he handed me a piece of paper.

“What’s this?” I inquired.

“A list of Emily’s phone numbers.”

I looked up at him. “Why?”

“Most of those are unlisted, and only a select few of us know about them, but I figure that if she’ll pick up for anyone right now, it might be you, considering she left the gift for you.”

“You want me to call all of these?” The list was probably nine to ten different phone numbers. How the hell did Emily have so many different phones?

Hotch nodded. “Just try.” He squeezed my shoulder reassuringly before leaving to take a seat with the team again.

I sighed and headed towards the back of the jet. “Whatever you say, boss.”

After stepping into the small bathroom, I turned and locked the door, then I slowly sat down on the toilet seat while turning the list over in my hands so that I could start dialing. The phone didn’t even ring once. There was an immediate dial tone, followed by a voice telling me that the phone number was disconnected by the owner. I sighed and began dialing the next number. Same thing. The first four were all disconnected lines, but by the fifth one, I finally got to her voicemail before a robotic voice told me that the inbox was full. I cursed under my breath. Was that how the next four numbers were going to be, too? There was probably no point to this in the first place. Emily didn’t want us to follow her, therefore she wasn’t going to let us contact her in any way, and I should have known better.

When I reached the last phone number, I entirely anticipated that it wouldn’t work. To my surprise, however, the voicemail came and ended, but there was no robotic voice. There was a single dial tone signaling me to start speaking, so I decided to just… go for it.

“Hey. It’s, um… It’s me. I don’t know if you’re safe, so I’ll keep it brief, but… Hotch said I should try calling all of your numbers to see if I happen to hear back from you. I don’t know why I’ve been sitting on the toilet in the jet for an hour doing all of this when I know you’re not going to pick up, but I just… I had to try. This is the only number that has room left for a voicemail. I don’t even know if you’ll ever hear this, but if you are… Emily… It’s time to come home. Please. I can’t do this without you—I don’t know how to do this without you. I read your letter, and I haven’t been able to stop crying and worrying about you since then. You’re not allowed to die, Emily Prentiss. Do you hear me? I don’t care what it takes, you’re not allowed to leave us. You’re not allowed to just write a goodbye letter and then make it seem like it’s okay that you might not get to meet my baby. You don’t get to say goodbye. Not like that. You don’t get to leave and make me regret not loving you and appreciating you more. Shit…” I sniffled. “I took your love and friendship for granted, Emily, and I’m so sorry. I had all the time in the world to look at you and tell you that I appreciate everything you’ve done for me and Hotch. You’re our family, Em. You always have been and you always will be. You’re one of the greatest friends I’ve ever had, and the worst part is that I couldn’t recognize or admit it until you were gone, and I can’t say it to your face. So, I just need you to come home. I need you to survive all of this bullshit. Because you deserve to meet my baby and give them the koala bear. They deserve to fall asleep in your arms. I deserve the chance to get to look at you and say: ‘I love you, Emily Prentiss. You’re one of my best friends. Thank you.’ Morgan, Reid, Garcia, Hotch, JJ, and Rossi… We’re all waiting to see you again. We love you.”

The call beeped, signaling that I had taken too long to record my message, so it was just sending what I had already said, and that was it. I sighed and turned off my phone.

When we landed in Boston, Hotch’s phone immediately started ringing. We were all stepping off the plane when Hotch answered and stopped in his tracks on the runway. We stopped, too, to gauge just how bad the news was. Then, he hung up. He looked at us and told us that Boston P.D. just responded to a call at a local bar where there was a shooting. They had confirmed that Emily was involved.

At the precinct, we were immediately set up with a monitor so that we could watch the video to confirm whether or not it was really our Emily Prentiss. The security camera outside of the bar was set up at an awkward angle, so all we could really see was a group of men climbing into two separate black SUVS. Out of nowhere, gunfire rained onto the side of the second car, and that was when we saw Emily stepping into the frame of the camera, a MAC-10 in her hands, and a flashbang being thrown into the broken window of the car. But when she approached the car, something seemed wrong.

Suddenly, Ian Doyle revealed himself from the shadows, his gun raised at her; and before Emily could do anything, he fired.

“Oh, my—” I jumped as the gunshots rang. I stumbled back and caught my footing on a nearby desk.

She was killing me with worry at this point. Every time something bad happened to our team, it built this knot in the pit of my stomach that made me want to puke or just completely fall to my knees and give up because worrying about them—my family—was sometimes too unbearable to handle. Worrying about Hotch, Morgan, and Emily specifically were the worst moments. When Hotch was in danger, it was like I couldn’t move or breathe. When Morgan was in danger—like when he stole the ambulance in New York, I felt like my legs would give out at any second and the only thing that could put me back together was knowing that he, my best friend in the entire world, was alright. And he was. Him and Hotch were always okay. No matter how much pain they put me through, at least I could say that they were okay and they were still with me. Hotch was still by my side. Morgan was still there to tease me every chance he got. Yet, this time, with Emily in the hot seat now, it felt like things weren’t going to be okay. That knot in my stomach was twisting in ways worse than ever before—and maybe it was because the stress was putting pressure on the baby, or maybe it was the fact that I never had to worry about her like this before… or maybe it was the fact that I didn’t realize that I cared for her this much until something terrible happened that I wasn’t sure was going to end with rainbows and unicorns. This didn’t feel right. There was something about my worry for her this time around that made me feel like something horrible was going to happen. And when I heard those gunshots echo through the security footage, I thought that was it. Before I saw Doyle pry open her shirt, I was convinced that it was over. I thought for sure as I jumped out of my own skin that I was never going to see her again.

“She’s alive,” JJ said, “that’s the good news.” She sighed heavily. “She’s alive.”

“Only because Doyle wants to toy with her,” Rossi said.

“Once he’s felt he’s made his point of revenge, he’ll kill her,” Hotch added.

“It gives us time to find her, though.” I turned back around to face the team. “We’re going to have to talk to Clyde Easter. He’s the only way we can stop hitting these walls in the case like complete fucking idiots.” Everyone seemed shocked at my anger. “Sorry,” I apologized quietly.

“You’re right.” Hotch crossed his arms over his chest and started drawing his thumb around his lips while thinking. “You want the honors of talking to him?” he asked me. I nodded eagerly. “Okay. Garcia, keep trying to track their path from the bar. See if you can narrow down where it is they took her. It’s probably somewhere remote. Definitely not in the center of the city.”

“Why not?” she asked.

“Because he’ll want to hear her scream,” Morgan answered blatantly.

No one said anything.

Before I could let his depressing words continue to seep into my mind and heart, I started walking towards the mirror room. Hotch silently followed me. When we reached the door, he skipped a few steps so that he could beat me to it and hold it open for me. I thanked him with a smile.

“I’ll go in first just to loosen him up a bit. Until then, you stay back here.” Hotch grabbed the doorhandle to the interrogation room, then stepped in.

Clyde immediately pushed himself to his seat. “What is this?! I demand to talk to the British Consulate!”

“Calm down.”

“You can’t keep me here. You would know that if you would let me speak with—”

“The British Consulate. Yeah, I know.” He turned the file in his hands over. “Clyde Easter, I’m Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner—”

“Oh, my god,” Easter groaned. “What the hell are you doing in here with me, then?! Shouldn’t you be out there, looking for her?”

Hotch ignored him by opening up the file. “October of 2006. ‘In closing, I have never worked with an agent finer than Agent Prentiss. Her skill at analyzing and predicting terrorist behavior is unparalleled.’ Signed, name redacted.” Hotch threw the file on the table. “Do you want to know what it was that I read when I was given her file in October of 2006? I’ll never forget it because it was the best recommendation I had ever read. ‘In closing, I have never worked with an agent finger than Agent Prentiss. Her skill at analyzing data and predicting the behaviors of potential serial killers is unparalleled.’ Signed, name redacted. I never knew who it was that wrote that recommendation, and I never found out how it was that a small-time data analyst agent got moved from a desk job to being a profiler for the BAU. That was why it impressed me. I can remember staring at it for hours while asking myself, what was it that Cody and Strauss saw in this girl that was so different from the rest of my team that she got special permission to join the unit? I didn’t clear her. In fact, I was told that she was cleared to be on my team, and that was the end of it. But now I know how it happened. The recommendation came from you, it went to Interpol and the CIA, who then sent it to Cody as it was, and he saw an opportunity to steal away a brilliant agent from Europe and utilize her within his greatest unit at the Bureau, so he took it. You used all the right buzzwords with him, which was how Emily was transferred. But her work with your unit was confidential, so you had to write a second recommendation that used my buzzwords in order to get me off your scent.”

“Okay. And?”

“It takes a true sociopath to betray his team and the cause he held dear for self-preservation.”

“So, then, you don’t believe any of your team is capable of that kind of betrayal?”

“I know they aren’t.”

Easter chuckled. “Sure.”

“My point is, if you help us save Agent Prentiss, I might be willing to make a deal with you. Otherwise, you’ll end up in Guantanamo Bay. That’s not what you want. Is it?”

Easter didn’t say anything. Hotch had to know that his threat was entirely empty, right? I mean, we only suspected that Clyde Easter was the one who sold out his team to Doyle, but we had no way to prove it; and by the looks of it, Easter knew that. This tactic wasn’t going to work on him.

“She said you were the best,” Clyde finally said. “I’m unimpressed, however. As I’ve already said, I cannot help you.”

Hotch sighed and took his leave, reentering the mirror room to send me a look that told me that it was finally my turn. So, that was all apart of the plan. He knew that he wasn’t going to get in with Easter that way, but it would get him worked up enough that I could find a way in. I nodded and switched places with him, heading into the interrogation room.

“Hello, I’m Agent—”

“Great,” Easter threw his hands up, “another agent. Like I told the other guy, I won’t speak to any of you. I want to speak to the British Consulate first!”

I rolled my eyes and continued, “I’m Agent Hotchner.” That surely got his attention, as I knew it would. “We need your help saving Emily.”

“Like I told the other Agent Hotchner, there’s nothing I can do for you.”

I searched his eyes for a moment, reading the sparkle there that was pleading for answers and to know that Emily was safe. He cared for her just as much as we did. We were all panicked and racing around to rescue her from Doyle, yet Easter knew he couldn’t, and that was killing him slower than potentially anything Doyle had planned for him. I could use that. Unfortunately, it was my only way in with him; and by catching that slight bit of empathy hidden behind that thick skin of his, I could poke that button now to gain his favor.

So, I used the only thing I could think of. Even Hotch didn’t know this yet, but he was standing in the mirror room, so he was about to find out. “I never got the chance to tell her that she’s going to be the godmother of my child.” Easter’s attention snapped to me. “I need your help giving me that chance.”

Suddenly, as if on cue, Hotch burst into the room. “Did you know that Jeremy sold the list to Doyle?”

I cocked a brow while glancing between the two men in the room. “What?”

“I had my suspicions,” Easter answered. Any bit of rapport I had just built with him was washed away by Hotch’s interruption. Great.

“We need your team’s original profile of Ian Doyle so that we can save Emily’s life,” Hotch said.

“I can’t do that—”

“We need to know who he is as a terrorist in order to profile him as a torturer and serial killer.”

“I can’t do that,” he repeated, this time with his voice fluctuating to tell us that there was more to be said, “without making a deal first.” I rolled my eyes. “You have to kill Ian Doyle yourself. Even if it means killing him without cause.”

“No.”

“You must. If you don’t kill him, then he’s going to keep going after her.”

“I said, no. We don’t kill people without reason.”

“Then, you must do whatever it takes to keep Emily alive. If you think he’s a danger to her, then you must kill him. Protect her at all costs, Agent Hotchner.”

Hotch hesitated for a moment. “Okay.”

The door opened again. JJ was standing in the entryway, still holding onto the doorknob, leaning into the room as she said, “The British Consulate just arrived.”

“Tell them—” Hotch began.

Easter cut him off, “Tell them that their assistance is not required. I’m now consulting with the BAU on a case. That is… if Agent Hotchner agrees to the rest of my terms.” We all looked at him blankly. “Privately.”

The room was silent for a moment as we all stayed still, watching each other intently, waiting for someone to say something. There was no way Hotch was going to agree to that. Easter could ask for anything, and with how desperate we were, Hotch would probably give in, and we all knew it—Easter most of all. At least together we could become a voice of reason for one another. Alone, we were weak. Together, we were unbreakable and perfect. Working together every single day then being able to go home with a still healthy and loving relationship proved that much to everyone who ever doubted us, including JJ, who was still standing at the door.

“Go catch up with the team,” Hotch ordered me quietly.

“Hotch—”

“Go.”

“Aaron, this is a bad—”

“Go,” he ordered more demandingly, his eyes staring into mine with a look that Dominated me into submission. “Go.”

I looked away from him and headed out of the interrogation and mirror rooms with JJ, but I didn’t go to catch up with the team as Hotch had intended— hell, I didn’t even stick around JJ’s side long enough to let her see me kick a wall as hard as I could. I had him. I had Easter right where I fucking wanted, and as usual, Hotch came in to muck it up, thinking that he was saving the day; but now he was alone in there, making whatever deal it was with Easter instead of trusting me—his closest ally and coworker, and his wife. It was infuriating. I could have gotten Easter’s help without all of these extra steps and dramatics. Maybe Hotch was just mad that I brought up the fact that I wanted Emily to be our baby’s godmother. I hadn’t told him about that yet, and it was a rude way for me to let him know what I was thinking, I’d be the first to admit, but he had no right storming in there to break the sudden news that it was Jeremy who had sold out his own team. Fucking Jeremy. Did Tsia know? Clearly Emily and Clyde didn’t. But how could Jeremy possibly do that to his own team? It just begged the question that Easter had asked, were we so sure one of us wouldn’t do the same thing if we were desperate? I shook off the thought. There was no way in hell we would betray each other. We were family. We didn’t keep secrets—at least, none of us except for Emily…

“Sweetness,” Morgan cooed, carefully approaching me. I turned to him while huffing. He threw his hands up in surrender once he saw how red my face was from getting angry and taking it out on the defenseless wall. “You okay?”

“No,” I answered blatantly.

He lowered his hands. “Same.”

I sighed and rested my back against the wall. “I don’t hate her, I swear. I’m just…”

“Worried.”

I looked at him. “Yeah.”

“Me, too.”

“Hotch and Easter are making some kind of deal, I guess,” I said, changing subjects quickly because I felt like if I kept talking about her and the way I missed her, I would fall apart.

Morgan nodded. “They’re already done.” As I cocked a curious brow at him, he gestured behind him as if to say: “They’re waiting for us.” I still didn’t understand, though. “Easter’s presenting his team’s original profile to us.”

I immediately pushed myself off the wall, caught my footing, and stormed past Morgan to head to the boardroom where our team was set up. They were all waiting around patiently. Easter and Hotch were at the front of the room, both silent as they caught a glimpse of me and Morgan entering the room. I watched Hotch carefully while I circled the room and sat down in an empty chair. I was trying to get a read on the situation. What was it that he and Easter said to each other? Did he agree to any deal? Was the deal entirely outrageous? Was he ever going to tell me about the deal? Honestly, if it were important—or if he had taken the deal, he would tell me. Like I said a thousand times before, we didn’t keep secrets from each other. I trusted that he would tell me the truth in due time.

Easter cleared his throat as he began reciting the profile for us. Ian Doyle was a terrorist known under the name of Valhalla. Most of his work was spent in the U.S. smuggling weapons for the Irish Mob, but when he met Lauren Reynolds—or as we knew her, Emily Prentiss—he turned his attention towards building his own empire. His first attack was on his own uncle in Ireland. It was a calculated attack to gain power within the family, and it worked, however, it cost twenty-three innocent people their lives, too. After that, Doyle had to stay low while planning his next attack for power, which was going to be on a rival in Germany. That was when the clock started racing for Emily to complete the profile sooner. After a few months of staying undercover with Doyle in the farmlands of Italy, she reported back to her team with the following information: He was a power-assertive psychopath, who was highly controlling and precise, and if something ever went the slightest bit off plan, he lost his shit.

Sounded like someone I knew. I looked over at Hotch quickly.

“He had a son,” Easter continued. “I don’t know anything about him. Name, age, appearance, anything. Emily was very protective of him, claiming that we were there to profile Doyle, not ruin a child’s life. So, we never pried about it; though, in hindsight, perhaps we should have.”

“Doyle’s son isn’t listed in any of the information in these files,” Morgan said.

“His existence was Need-to-Know only. From what I can tell, Doyle didn’t even put his name on his own son’s birth certificate in order to protect him.”

“But he kept him close,” Hotch said, “so, someone had to raise him.”

“I’ll check employee records,” Garcia said, already typing away on her computer. “I got him!” Garcia cheered. “His name is Declan Jones. He settled in Boston eight years ago with his adopted guardian, Louise Jones, Doyle’s housekeeper.”

“Are they still alive?” Hotch interrogated.

“They went missing seven years ago— Oh, my god—” She looked away from her screen after pressing a single key that projected what she saw up on the monitor for the rest of us.

There were dozens of photos of Declan and Louise on the dirty floor of an abandoned warehouse, duct tape on the mouths, ropes on their wrists, tears streaming down their faces. And then there was a gun being pointed at their heads. I shook my head in denial. No. Please. The next few images were of them being executed one by one. I closed my eyes in disappointment, disgust, and distraught.

“Wait…” Reid whispered under his breath, taking a few steps closer to the screen. “Morgan, look at this.” I opened my eyes long enough to see them both squinting at the screen. “Look at the fingernails. Who do we know that chews on them to that extent?”

“Emily,” Morgan answered lightly, as if shock were settling in his stomach.

“I think I found the warehouse where these pictures were taken,” Garcia spoke up. Suddenly, all of our phones dinged with an address.

Hotch examined it for a moment. “Okay. We’ll give it a shot.”

The team scattered to go collect their gear. Meanwhile, Garcia and JJ stayed put. I, on the other hand, had something on my mind. So, I carefully snuck out of the boardroom and tracked down Hotch to a room where they had a stack of FBI bulletproof vests. I stopped around the corner, however, when I heard Hotch getting off the phone with Strauss. Why the hell was he calling Strauss? I didn’t understand.

Within the next few moments, Hotch was getting ahold of a SWAT team to meet them at the location. While I was eavesdropping, I heard him mention that it was a high-risk situation. My heart started racing in my chest, and I felt like I was going to cry or start panicking. It felt like I was going to lose everyone at once, and the worst part was that I couldn’t do anything about the situation to tilt fate one way or another. If it were me out there, I would have jumped in front of any bullet aimed at anyone on the team. But I wasn’t going out there with them. I was being forced to stay back with JJ and Garcia. How was I supposed to trust that Spencer would jump in front of Hotch? He wouldn’t. The scariest part was that, if I lost Hotch or Morgan, as well as Emily, I wouldn’t know what to do. My life felt like it was crumbling into dust in my hands, and every anxious idea I ever had in my life was consuming me in that moment.

“Y/N?” Hotch waved a hand in my face. I snapped out of my trance long enough to look up at him with foggy eyes. “Baby, it’s going to be okay…” he cooed, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me close, our foreheads pressed against each other. “I’m going to have a body cam on so that you can make sure I’m safe the whole time.”

“Please be careful out there,” I whispered.

His breath was hot on my nose as he said. “I will. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

He kissed my lips quickly, yet still passionately, before pulling himself away from me and hurrying out of the room, trading spots with Morgan who needed to grab his vest. My eyes followed him. For a short moment, neither of us said anything, giving me a chance to read his body language. Everything about him was angry. Since we knew for sure that Emily was involved in all of this, Morgan had decided that he was going to be pissed off with her compared to just trying to be understanding and focus on finding her until we could ask her all of our questions.

“Are you going to be okay out there?” I questioned. He nodded while pulling the vest over his head. “Do me a favor, then?” He nodded again. “Watch his back for me since I can’t.”

Morgan looked up at me as he snapped the velcro straps together. “I’ll try.”

I flung my arms around him without warning. He stumbled back before catching me, his arms somewhat embracing me since he didn’t want to squeeze me too hard with my baby bump in the way. I hid my face against the hem of his v-neck. “Thank you.” I let out a sigh. “She’ll be okay.” I knew that had been weighing on his mind, and that was why he was incredibly upset with her. He just cared for her the same way he cared for me and Garcia, and he just couldn’t imagine losing any of us; so, he was taking that anxiety out on all of us using anger… He just needed to hear, “She’s going to be okay,” again, though, and it seemed to help somewhat.

----

Things spiraled quickly and without any warning. Just as SWAT kicked down the door, gunfire was exchanged, causing Hotch, Morgan, Rossi, and Reid to all scatter and find another way into the building. Reid and Morgan went together, but Hotch and Rossi went to the right. They were splitting up. No. Please. Morgan promised that he would watch Hotch’s back for me. I needed them to be together, to make sure that they were both okay, and that they were going to come back to me.

A man stepped out of the door Hotch and Rossi were headed towards. Just as the man raised his weapon at Hotch, I gasped, my hand flying up to cover my mouth in a panic. Rossi shot the man first, though. My shoulders relaxed and I let myself catch my breath. Garcia, on the other hand, had finally decided that enough was enough, and she turned away at the first sight of blood.

Finally, Rossi grabbed ahold of the door before it could slam shut, and Hotch ran in, careful to check every dark corner, every open room, and every locked door. This was the dangerous part. Anyone could have jumped out at any time, catching him off guard, taking him and the chance to say goodbye away from me. Yet, there was no one there. It was like a ghost town until they met up with SWAT again towards the exit of the building where all of the bodies of Doyle’s men were piled up from their failed attempt to fight back.

“We’ve cleared this area,” the SWAT leader told Hotch. “We’re clearing the rest of the building now.”

“We got the right—” Hotch began responding.

“Hotch!” Morgan shouted into the comms. “Prentiss is down!”

My face fell. What the fuck was he talking about? Where was Doyle? How had things spiraled so quickly? The team had only just infiltrated the building, and now there were no eyes on Ian Doyle, and Morgan was claiming that something was wrong with Emily. I refused to believe that she was dead. I didn’t care what he said. There was no way in hell I was going to lose her like this, and there was no way I was never going to see her again. It just wasn’t possible.

Hotch turned on his heels and started dashing in the opposite direction of the exit to go find Morgan in order to see what was really going on. I didn’t believe it. Emily was somewhat of a trickster, though she would never outright admit it. Her and Morgan were devious together, though. I could remember the way she and I used to pick on him for the smallest things, and then the next day, they would team up to prank me as payback. Emily was never the instigator or victim in those cases. She just went with the flow, and she always had the brightest smile on her face. So, I was sure that Hotch was about to turn that corner, and what we were going to see was Emily Prentiss with that bright, toothy grin lighting up her face and the entire room, and Morgan would be laughing behind her at our expense.

“Y/N,” JJ whispered to me, her eyes moving from the monitor to me. I didn’t look at her. “Y/N, you’re hypervent—”

“It’s not true,” I insisted quickly.

Honestly, I hadn’t even realized how lightheaded I was until JJ said something, but that wasn’t going to break my concentration. I was just waiting for Hotch to turn that corner. In just a few moments, all of my suspicions would be confirmed, and I would be able to calm down. I’d be able to breathe, sit down, maybe drink something cold to keep me from puking everywhere.

And then I saw her.

For the briefest moment, I saw her raven hair, and I smiled. For just a single millisecond, I thought that everything was alright, and that we were going to all go home tonight together, and I’d never let her go again. But then Hotch stepped closer. He was hesitant at first, almost like he couldn’t believe what he saw, yet as Morgan’s pleas for help got louder, Hotch ran over to her and grabbed her hand with Morgan. Once he was close enough, I could see the large wooden stake buried in her stomach, right where all of the most vital organs lived.

She was losing consciousness. Her eyes kept fluttering, as if she was fighting her very hardest to keep looking at them. Despite both Morgan and Hotch trying to convince her to keep her eyes open, however, Emily was ultimately starting to slowly close her eyes, her head tilting to the side. A sob left me without warning.

“Hotch…” Emily whispered. She could hardly move, breathe, or speak, yet she was still trying. She was so strong. She always was. She was the strongest person I knew. She could get through this. She could get through anything. “Hotch…”

“I’m right here,” he cooed.

She sighed weakly. “Tell… Tell Y/N I’m sorry… And… I… They didn’t take me for granted…”

“Stop it, Prentiss. You’re going to talk to them yourself,” Morgan insisted.

Her hand was starting to release his, though, and her head was falling back as her eyes couldn’t stay open any long. Hotch shook his head and leaned into her desperately. “Come on, Emily. Stay awake for us. The medics are almost here.” I saw a tear of his land on her collarbone. “Please.” But she wasn’t moving anymore. “Please…”

“No, no, no, no,” Morgan mumbled under his breath as Emily stopped breathing. “No. Emily—” He pressed his palms against her chest to begin performing CPR. “Where are the fucking medics?!”

Just then, as if they realized just how late they were running, a group of medics came storming into the room. Morgan kept pumping Emily’s lungs, but Hotch took a step back to leave the professionals room to help save Emily. I fell into the chair behind me. I couldn’t lose her. Not like this. Not when I was entirely unable to help her or even say goodbye. I wanted to tell her that she had nothing to be sorry for, and that I was the stupid one who did take her for granted, but I loved her so much. I wanted to look at her and tell her that. I wanted it to be with her in that moment, holding her and telling her to keep breathing and blinking because she was going to be the godmother of my child. She had every reason to live now. If for some dumb fucking reason she thought it was okay to let go now in order to spare us some kind of pain, that wasn’t the truth! She had to know that she was going to be a real part of our family now. We needed her here. I needed her here.

Suddenly, she let out a gasp as she woke up. Morgan immediately stumbled back, falling onto his tailbone so that he could be out of the way, too. Within an instant, the medics were sliding her onto a stretcher, then working together to carry her outside, Hotch and Morgan following closely.

“What…” I cleared my throat. “What hospital…”

“St. Bernard’s!” Morgan answered while racing on his toes towards the SUV so that he could drive behind the ambulance.

I pushed myself up to my feet, inviting JJ and Garcia’s stretched out arms that were there to catch me in case I ended up collapsing, which honestly felt entirely possible now. But I tried my best to ignore it.

JJ drove while Garcia and I sat in the back together, holding hands in an attempt to help ease our nerves. We were both shaking like chihuahuas. Honestly, I wasn’t even sure how it was that JJ got us to the hospital safe and sound. If I were driving, I would have crashed before leaving the parking lot of the police station. By the time we were stepping out of the SUV, I thought I was going to pass out due to the nerves, yet JJ still seemed like an unwavering force in the face of disaster. She was set on the path of one thing and one thing only… Finding the team and seeing if Emily was alright. In fact, she seemed more determined than any of the rest of us.

When we found the waiting room, we discovered that the team was sitting around in silence. They had all taken their vests off and thrown them onto a single chair in the corner. Morgan was on his own, staring down at his bloody hands. Meanwhile, Reid and Rossi were together, staring at the wall, both of them entirely lost in thought. And then there was Hotch… He was sitting just ahead of me, his face buried in his hands as his knee bounced like crazy. He had taken off his tie, and the top button of his dress shirt was undone, just as his cufflinks had been undone, too. My face pouted. When he looked up at me, I saw just how distraught he was, and I knew that the only thing that could possibly help make things better was to hold each other close. He seemed to have the same thought because he pushed himself to his feet and held out his arms for me.

“Have you guys heard anything?” I asked as I flung my arms around Hotch.

“Nothing yet.”

“I’m going to talk to the doctors,” JJ said, already walking out of the room.

Hotch let go of me slightly, giving me a chance to turn around to see that Morgan still hadn’t looked up from his hands. I whispered to Hotch that he should sit down and wait for me to come back. He nodded and did as he was told. Without saying anything, I left the waiting room to find a nurse to see if she could give me a cloth and a water bottle in order to wipe all of the blood off of Morgan. When I had what I needed, I returned to the room to see that Garcia was trying to console him already, so I handed the materials to her then went to sit down next to Hotch.

Without hesitating, Hotch took my hand in his, and he hid his face against my bicep. “I can’t do this,” he whispered.

“It’s okay. She’s going to be okay.”

He shook his head, but he didn’t say anything.

A few minutes later, as JJ returned from tracking down the doctors to get an update on how Emily was doing, we all sat up straight to hear the news. Though, nothing technically had to be said. Just from her posture, her puffy, red face, and the way her lip was quivering, I knew that it wasn’t good. Maybe she wouldn’t be able to come back to the FBI? Maybe she wouldn’t be able to walk again? No. I had to stop imaging the worst. JJ just had to tell us. So, we waited for her to gain the courage.

“She never made it off the table,” she finally admitted.

“No,” I shook my head in denial. “No, you’re lying.”

JJ just stared at all of us while blinking away the tears.

I kept shaking my head. “JJ, where is she?”

She didn’t move.

“JJ!” I exclaimed angrily, pushing myself to my feet.

Hotch tried to pull me down. I felt my breath shudder as a choked back sob slowly crept out of my chest. The whole world was crashing down on me. The pain I felt in New York was nothing compared to this. The pain of seeing Haley dead on our bedroom floor was lightyears away from this. This wasn’t real. I was dreaming. Emily wasn’t gone. She probably just got out of surgery and her first thought was to have JJ play some kind of a sick joke on us. Well, ha ha. I wanted to see her now.

Reid stood from his chair and tried to push past JJ, but she caught him in a hug. When I saw them both break down into tears, I finally realized that this was real. This was happening. My knees buckled and I wavered slightly. Hotch jumped up and wrapped his arms around me so that I wouldn’t fall over. I cried out and sobbed as hard as I could. She was supposed to come home. She was supposed to meet my baby.

-------------

criminal minds family: @peggy1999 @gorgeousdarkangel @alex--awesome--22 @oceaneblu @brithedemonspawn @absolutemarveltrash @bshelley322 @rousethemouse @sunshinepower17 @weexinling @pettttyyyc @braty-angel

#Criminal Minds #criminal minds fanfic #Criminal Minds Fanfiction #criminal minds smut #criminal minds imagine #aaron hotchner #Aaron Hotch Hotchner #aaron hotchner fanfic #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner imagine

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blouisparadise · 4 years

Photo

Upon request, here is a rec list of bottom Louis fics where Louis and/or Harry use drugs during the course of the fic. If you support our rec lists and want them to continue being made, please reblog this post and spread the word. Happy reading!

1) Lips Are Like The Galaxy’s Edge | Mature | 2365 words

Harry licks over Louis’ hole slowly, deliberately, and his tongue is like velvet and Louis’ skin is burning at every junction where Harry touches him and it’s all so good he thinks he might cry. He licks a few more times, moaning softly like he’s relishing the taste of Louis and that’s just, well, fuck.

2) Can You Feel The Fever | Explicit | 5113 words

Note: This fic is a sequel to this fic.

Tour has Harry exhausted. Luckily exactly what he needs is waiting for him in his Sacramento dressing room.

3) Read You Like A Book | Explicit | 8089 words

Louis realises Harry can read his mind. He’ll do anything to make Harry admit it. Set during the North American leg of the WWA tour.

4) Put You On Repeat, Play You Everywhere I Go | Explicit | 8290 words

Harry is a college radio show host and Louis is a contemporary dancer attending said college. After a drunk hook-up, naturally a whole bunch of pining, dedicated love songs and make-out sessions on dance studio floors ensue.

5) Keep It Sweet In Your Memory | Explicit | 17039 words

'How'd it go?' Harry pushes them into Niall's room and shuts the door behind him, so Georgia doesn't overhear.

'It was good. We just caught up, mostly... I may have done something a little stupid, though.'

And Niall's eyebrows are in his hairline at that.

'I mean. Okay, so I invited Louis out on Saturday.'

'Saturday? Your--'

'Yes, my bachelor party...' and then Harry has to explain himself, 'I just felt guilty. I think. He was like. Telling me he wanted to hook up.'

'He WHAT!?'

'No. I mean, not with me. Like. He wants to go out and meet people.'

'He'll hate that. He's too much of a romantic.'

'Yeah, well. Whatever his name was messed him up a little, it would seem.'

6) Never Understood What Love Was Really Like (But I Felt It For The First Time Looking In Your Eyes) | Not Rated | 18431 words

The one where Louis meets Harry at 14 and things don’t quite go as planned.

7) Ain’t My Fault | Explicit | 18690 words

Note: This fic has mentions of BH.

AU. Liam posts an ad on the wrong section of Craigslist, Louis is pretty sure they’re gonna get murdered as a result, and Harry’s missing an avocado.

8) Kiwi | Not Rated | 24110 words

AU. Harry plays on Saturday nights at The Motley. Louis bartends on Saturday nights at The Motley.

It’s a thing.

9) Honey, Make This Easy | Explicit | 25483 words

AU; Harry’s sister recently passed away, leaving him with temporary custody of her daughter. Needing help, he hires Louis as a nanny and the boy turns out to be help in more ways than he expected.

10) Can’t Fool Me | Explicit | 30162 words

AU where Louis hates fraternities and would never be into a frat boy. And one of these things is definitely not a lie.

11) Captain Jack | Explicit | 31752 words

Note: Please take note of the tags and warnings on this fic before reading

Louis has been searching for something and Harry is there to give it to him. Drugs, sex, disappointment, and the tangled web they’ve woven that keeps them trapped in the same cycle.

12) Can I Make It Any More Obvious? | Explicit | 35560 words

AU where Louis does ballet and Harry is the epitome of everything Louis’ friends want him to stay away from.

13) Bluebird | Explicit | 39024 words

The 2,789 miles between New York and Los Angeles is a long way to go alone.

14) Another Hazy May | Mature | 41042 words

Louis is a terrible poet and Harry lives in the now and they have six weeks to fall in love but, really, it only takes six seconds. bookshop meets military meets summer romance AU ft. Marlboros, the backstreet boys, and underrated literary devices.

15) Looking Through You | Explicit | 41905 words

Just as Louis and Liam were starting out in the music industry, writing and producing for up and coming artists, a fateful meeting with new pop singer Harry Styles changes everything. Four years later, just as Harry is set to embark on his next world tour, a drunken confession causes a rift between once inseparable friends. As Harry tries to make sense of his feelings for Louis, he begins writing his next album to express them as it may be the only way to break through the walls that Louis has built between them.

16) Tangled Up In You | Explicit | 45152 words

Harry blinks once. And blinks again. And says, his voice dangerous: “Niall, did you get me a mail-order bride?”

Because what the actual fuck. It kind of looks like Niall’s just purchased a person. For Harry.

Niall blinks back at him for a few moments, before throwing his head back and howling with laughter. Harry throws a pillow at him. Hard. “No, what the fuck, Harry.”

“A prostitute then?” Harry also doesn't want a prostitute.

“Of course not!”

“A stripper?”

“No!”

Damn, he’s running out of ideas. He settles for launching another pillow at Niall’s head. Niall bats it away easily, still laughing. “Stop!”

“What did you get me, then?!” Niall must hear the tinge of hysteria in his voice, because he’s pulling himself together, trying to stop himself from laughing.

There’s still a big grin on his face, though, when he says, “I got you a professional cuddler.”

A professional…what. “What?”

17) Apples Always Fall (As I Do For You) | Mature | 54609 words | Sequel

Note: This fic is locked and can only be read by AO3 users.

Louis is staying at his Aunt's farm in a small town in Minnesota for four months. To deal with the boredom that sets in a week into his stay, he starts working at the local apple orchard, owned by twenty six year old Harry Styles.

Louis quickly finds himself falling in love with the orchard, and he finds a family in Harry's friends Niall, Liam, and Zayn.

He also starts to fall in love with Harry.

Falling in love with him turns out to be the easy part.

18) Into The Midnight Sun | Explicit | 63525 words

It’s 1983, Harry embarks on his first world tour and Louis is a budding actor in LA. Life spent apart isn’t easily adjustable, but somehow they make it work.

19) Like Real People Do | Explicit | 64175 words

Louis didn’t ask for a lot of things. He didn’t ask for his entire family to die in a car crash that may or may not have been his fault. He didn’t ask to get powers out of that accident, either, powers that eventually led him into a two-year relationship with a man who was far more than met the eye. But one night, he chose to ask for a replacement to a broken camera from someone he hadn’t spoken to in a year and a half. He did ask for that. And that kind of led to everything else.

20) Liberté | Mature | 64603 words

AU. 1647. “Pretending you don’t have a heart is not the best way to not get it broken. It’s just the easiest.”

21) Pinkies Never Lie | Explicit | 83615 words | Sequel

AU in which Louis hates his job and loves Harry, Harry just wants a distraction, everyone else wants them to get their shit together, and Louis learns the hard way that new beginnings are only possible when something ends.

22) Baby Heaven’s In Your Eyes | Explicit | 120875 words

They couldn’t be more different if they tried. Louis Tomlinson is 17 years old and in his last year of the most prestigious private school in Doncaster. If there’s one thing that completely annoys him, it’s that there is a poor community college right across the street.

Harry Styles is 19 years old, and (once again) in his last year of college. He goes to community college in Doncaster. He never shows up to classes and if he actually bothers to, he’s either high or drunk; sometimes both. His skin is littered with tattoos and if there’s one thing he absolutely hates, it’s the snobby students attending the private school right across from his.

23) Saving Symphony Hall | Mature | 124766 words

Note: This is a sequel to this fic. This fic has been locked and can only be read by AO3 users.

“I think I have an idea,” Louis said. Slowly, and reluctantly, but with a growing sense of the inevitable. “God damnit, I think I have a really good idea.”

“Oh christ, that’s the problem-solving face,” Babs said. “Last time we saw that face, he sold a company.”

“Wait, what?” Zayn asked.

“Right place, right time,” Louis said. “Also, fuck my life,”

“What?” Zayn repeated. Niall patted his hand.

“I usually just roll with whatever Louis is about to do,” he said. “It’s better for us all.”

“That’s the attitude,” said Louis, “I’ll tell you tomorrow. Tonight, I need to do some research. Zayn, give me your number. I’m gonna save our symphony.”

24) I Only Ever Want You | Explicit | 180079 words

Note: This fic is the sequel to this fic.

Louis & Harry and Liam & Zayn begin to have sex in front of each other and a lot of kink-discovery results from that.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

#bottom louis #top harry #drug use #drug tw #larry #fic recs #blp #blp fic recs

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alecmagnuslwb · 3 years

Text

Plus One

Read on AO3

Izzy & Meliorn ~ May 1st, Saratoga Springs, New York

“So?” Alec says tentative and a little nervous. He’s never had to give a wedding speech before and he can guarantee he’ll never give one as important as this. His baby sister will only have one wedding, god willing, and he wants to get it right.

Magnus taps his finger to his lips quietly the setting sun catching in his brown eyes as he leans against the pillar outside of the venue where the reception is being held.

“Pretty good, could be a little shorter though,” he settles on with a serious nod of his head.

“Shorter?” Alec says all nerves gone. “Magnus it’s not even five full minutes, I make it much shorter and it becomes a haiku.”

Magnus perks up with a smirk. “A haiku could be nice!” he says pushing off the pillar and stepping closer to Alec. He reaches out brushing something Alec was unaware of off of his shoulder. “People are here to dance and take advantage of the free bar, not listen to the Gettysburg Address.”

Alec rolls his eyes and brushes Magnus’ hand away. “I’m not making it any shorter, Isabelle will hate it if I keep it too short and if I upset her I’ll get that disappointed head tilt that Meliorn gives when anyone makes her sad, you know how bad that head tilt is.”

“It is very judgmental, makes you feel like you kicked a puppy,” Magnus says before tilting his head towards the entrance. “Come on you better get in there.”

Alec nods shaking out the last of his nerves and following Magnus into the hall beautifully decorated like some sort of magical forest.

The first few hours of the reception are a blur, Alec makes his speech and Magnus raises a glass of champagne at him with a wrap it up gesture that has him barely containing his eye roll while letting out a chuckle that eases any lingering nerves he has about the whole thing. After that he loses track of his friend, being passed around from family member to family member inquiring about his obvious lack of a date and plans for the future.

Eventually he finds himself at the bar finally shaking the grilling of his great aunt about the nice man from church she knows that’ll be perfect for him. Meliorn sidles up next to him flipping their complicated braid over their shoulder.

“Finally shake great aunt Emma’s love connection attempts?” they ask pausing for a moment to order two glasses of wine.

Alec nods taking a sip of his whiskey, “I thought I was going have to physically fight her to leave me alone.”

Meliorn hums in understanding. “Give her till the day after the wedding and she’ll be hounding Isabelle and I about having children, that should lighten the burden on you.”

Alec snorts. “Damn is she going to be more disappointed with that venture than she is with her failed attempts at setting me up with every gay man who so much as smiles at her.”

Meliorn smirks a little as he accepts the two glasses of wine from the bartender and turns out to face the dance floor.

“We’ve been debating whether lying and making her think we might have them or being truthful about our complete lack of ever wanting to procreate is better,” Meliorn says taking a sip from one of the glasses. He looks out at the dance floor watching mesmerized as Isabelle glides across the floor dancing with their little brother Max. Alec smiles, he’ll never stop being so endlessly happy for his little sister finding someone who adores her the way Meliorn does.

“Either way we’ll figure it out together,” Meliorn says finally pulling their gaze away from the dance floor. “Speaking of together,” he says looking over to the right where the singles table sits. “You should go check on your boy.”

Alec looks over and sees Magnus slumped over his head on the table and his fingers gliding along a few too many empty glasses.

Alec turns ready to correct Meliorn on the ‘your boy’ comment, but they’re already gone sliding over to hand the second glass of wine to Isabelle. It’s not the first time since Magnus moved back to New York that Meliorn or a number of others have made such a comment.

He and Magnus aren’t together, not like that. They’re old friends and that’s all. They’d met in college when Magnus had briefly dated Alec’s roommate, in the short tenure of that relationship they became closer than Magnus had with his roommate and from there they’d just stuck, their friends’ groups crossing over and even hooking up like Izzy and Meliorn eventually had.

Their friendship became distant after graduation though Magnus moving to London for work made them more email on your birthday friends than anything else, until nearly six years later he’d made his return to New York. They’ve been pretty tight since then, but more and more lately as all their college friends have paired off and they near thirty people seem to assume he and Magnus are a thing.

He’s not quite sure when the shift occurred for everyone else and why exactly it happened. He’s shaken from his thoughts about it however when he watches Magnus attempt to stand and he practically falls right back into his chair far less graceful than he usually is.

Alec discards his glass and heads for the table arriving just as Magnus attempts to stand again. Magnus stumbles a bit and Alec catches his arm just in time preventing the fall.

“Woah there, maybe it’s time we cut you off,” Alec says as he stabilizes Magnus.

Magnus looks up at Alec confidently. “I’m fine, Alexander,” he says closing his words out with a hiccup at the end.

Alec snorts. “Sure you are,” he says. “Let’s get you to your room.”

Magnus shakes his head furiously and then looks like he instantly regrets it pressing a hand to his forehead.

“Don’t have one,” Magnus says with an overexaggerated sigh.

“You don’t have-,” Alec starts and sighs. He shakes out his arm and looks at his watch. It’s nearing midnight, the reception is already pretty empty, his mom and Luke are some of the only one’s still here dancing with Max to a song he knows for a fact his little brother requested, and he’s fairly certain Isabelle won’t be offended if he takes his leave.

“Just wait here a second,” he says settling Magnus back down into his chair. Magnus salutes him playfully before resting his chin on his hands.

Alec walks over to where Isabelle is tangled together with her partner. Meliorn whispers something in her ear and she giggles into his shoulder. It’s such a beautiful, private moment that he loathes to intrude, but he also knows he’ll never hear the end of it from her if he just leaves without a word.

She waves him off before he can fully explain the situation getting up from her spot on Meliorn’s lap and hugging Alec tightly. He moves back over to the table where he left Magnus, ruffling his little brother’s hair as he passes by him.

Magnus hasn’t moved an inch and for a second Alec wonders if he fell asleep.

“Magnus,” he says startling him upward. He attempts to stand but sways a bit again and Alec puts an arm around his waist stabilizing him. “Come on let’s get you out of here.”

“So handsy,” Magnus says with a chuckle. Alec just huffs out a laugh and tugs him along. The hotel he’s staying in is luckily only next door and aside from stopping Magnus from chasing down a cat they see in the alleyway they make it there without incident.

They’re quiet as they walk into the lobby. Alec looks to the elevator a line of people waiting and sighs pulling Magnus along in the hopes that he can handle the stairs.

“Where are we going?” Magnus asks finally saying something as they start up the steps.

“My room since you didn’t deem to get one,” Alec says moving so Magnus goes up the stairs first that way he can catch him if necessary.

Magnus wiggles his eyebrows with a giggle and Alec just rolls his eyes once again at his drunk friend.

"And why didn't you get a room?" Alec asks as he helps Magnus up the stairs.

"Because I had intentions of catching the bus back tonight," Magnus says with a confident smile right before he stumbles over a step making his recovery look impossibly elegant despite his state. Alec holds his hands out hovering over him just in case, but Magnus keeps going. “Which I still could you know,” he adds on.

Alec shakes his head even though he knows Magnus can’t see him. “No way. It’s late and I am not letting you get on a bus alone and drunk, I already had to speak at a wedding I’m not speaking at your funeral too.”

Magnus snorts as Alec pulls them to a stop on his floor. “You’re not allowed to speak at my funeral, you’ll talk too long,” he says with a bright smile as Alec tugs him along down the hall to his room.

“Still on that, huh?” Alec says as he checks open the door with his shoulder and guides Magnus inside.

Magnus walks directly over to the bed and falls backwards onto it. He groans as he lays an arm across his eyes. “The singles table sucks, I wouldn’t have drunk so much if I wasn’t so heavily reminded of my terminal singlehood all night,” Magnus says with a sigh.

Alec walks over and sits down on the bed beside Magnus he reaches out a hand to pat Magnus on the shoulder the best he can.

“I get it,” he says sympathetically. He does get it, he’s been to his fair share of weddings solo, tonight he just had the luck of being a part of the wedding party instead of being relegated to a table with a bunch of other rejects he doesn’t really know. The older they get the more he realizes that he seems to be one of the only ones not settling down, each new wedding invitation he receives is a reminder that he hasn’t had a relationship go beyond a few dates in years.

Magnus sits up holding his stomach a bit as he does.

“I’m gonna get you some water,” Alec says heading to the bathroom he returns a moment later with a glass and some Tylenol in hand. He holds both out to Magnus and he takes them gratefully.

“Thank you,” he says before downing the whole glass of water and both pills.

Alec just nods and heads back into the bathroom to change into sweatpants and t-shirt discarding his suit. He grabs an extra t-shirt and some running shorts. He leans out the door and tosses them onto the bed beside Magnus startling him from another micro drunk nap it seems.

“You need to sleep,” he says. “Get changed, I’ll take the floor, you take the bed.” The last thing he sees before giving Magnus his privacy is a pout on his face as he looks down at the clothes beside him. He waits a few minutes before heading back out to find Magnus, clothes changed and sitting cross legged on the bed under the covers on one side.

He lifts his head up and smiles at Alec then immediately puts his head back down with a groan.

“You gonna be okay?” Alec asks as he walks over to the bed. Magnus just waves Alec off with a hand not lifting his head back up.

Magnus takes a moment to compose himself as Alec grabs the second pillow. He moves his bare feet and feels satisfied with the feel of the carpet under him as a sufficient place to sleep.

"Alec. Alexander. Alexander Lightwood," Magnus says after a few more beats his head in his hands.

"Are you just saying my name for fun or," Alec says trying not to laugh at Magnus as he struggles with his words lifting his head successfully this time.

"You can't sleep on the floor. You're 7 billion feet tall, you'll never fit," he says gesturing to the room at large.

Alec laughs at that and Magnus glares.

"One I'm literally only like four inches taller than you and two I think the floor has plenty of space," he says tossing the spare pillow down.

"Nope come on," Magnus says tossing aside the covers on the empty side of the bed.

Alec sighs. He knows he's not winning an argument with a drunk Magnus they may not have been bff’s in college but he's seen that determined blurry look in Magnus eyes before and he's lost the battle every single time be it over which drive through place to hit up or how many games of beer pong is too many games of beer pong.

He sighs picking up the pillow off the floor and throwing it and himself down dramatically next to Magnus.

"If you throw up on me I'll never speak to you again," Alec says as he gets comfortable.

Magnus rolls his eyes and settles down as well. "So dramatic," he says as he snuggles into his pillow. "I'll have you know Mr. Lightwood I haven't thrown up for any reason alcohol or otherwise related since 2003."

He reaches a hand across the bed bopping Alec on the nose. Alec scrunches up his face at the action as Magnus giggles, a cute little titter than Alec can't help but smile in response to.

"Vomit free since '03, my friend," he says proudly before promptly and immediately falling asleep.

***

The next morning Alec wakes up with Magnus impossibly sprawled sideways across the bed his legs strewn across Alec’s chest, his head dangerously close to falling off the side of the bed. Alec just shakes his head and slides out from under him heading downstairs to grab some of the continental breakfast for the both of them.

Magnus is awake by the time he gets back, looking impossibly good for someone who’s hungover and slept in their makeup. They eat quietly in companionable silence before Magnus drags himself into the shower.

Alec gets dressed while he’s in there forgoing a shower of his own in favor of getting on the road early so he can avoid any unnecessary traffic.

Eventually Magnus rolls out of the bathroom in the shirt and now wrinkled pants he’d worn to the wedding the night before and pair of sunglasses so large Alec has to laugh.

Magnus holds up a finger to him in warning and snatches the extra coffee Alec had picked up for him off of the tv stand before heading to the door.

Alec smiles, and only laughs a little bit all the way down to his car.

Magnus is quiet for the first hour or so of the drive sipping his coffee slowly and leaning his head against the window. Eventually he pushes the large sunglasses up on his head settling them in his messy, yet somehow still artfully styled hair.

“Thank you for last night,” Magnus says tilting his head to the side to look at Alec.

Alec shakes his head. “Don’t mention it.” He means it, ensuring the safety of his drunk friend isn’t a burden in any way.

“Well still, I didn’t intend to get so sloppy drunk last night and you saved me a lot of embarrassment and I appreciate it,” Magnus says.

“You may have not planned it, but I understand your reasoning. If it weren’t for the fact that I had to give that speech I would have been drinking right alongside you,” Alec says glancing at Magnus quickly with an understanding smile before looking back at the road. “I’ve got way too many of these things to go to this summer and I’m not looking forward to getting sat at the single’s table every time either.”

“I feel like I have like two dozen weddings to attend this summer alone, sadly you won’t be at every one of them to collect my drunk ass though,” Magnus says with a sigh.

“If you strategically plan out your drunkenness, I will be there for,” he pauses thinking in his head about the ones he knows they’ve both been invited to. “Five of them and I’ll make sure you don’t embarrass yourself too much. Well, at least not in front of anyone except me.”

Magnus laughs. “Ugh, from what I recall I wasn’t too bad, I’ve been worse,” he says in his own defense. “Hell, you’ve seen me worse.”

He has. Alec is to this day not a big drinker, but in college he always found himself dragged to some party with an empty red solo cup in his hand safely collecting his sister and friends at the end of the night.

“Like Omega-Phi senior year?” he says with a smirk referencing a specific evening he’ll never forget. Magnus however he knows doesn’t remember much at all, especially not the pants-less karaoke.

“How dare you?” Magnus says with a smile as he slaps Alec lightly on the chest.

“What was the song again, Spice Girls right? Not even one of their good songs too,” Alec teases, Magnus reaches out again smacking him a little harder this time. Alec playfully winces taking a hand off the wheel to rub at his chest as though it hurt.

“Spice Invaders is an underrated hit,” Magnus defends.

“It is called Spice Invaders it is absolutely not an underrated hit,” Alec says with a chuckle eyes on the road from the corner of his eye he sees Magnus roll his eyes.

They settle in quietly for a while after that Magnus looking brighter than he has since before the reception started the night before. They chat lightly for the rest of the drive on and off before Alec pulls up outside of Magnus’ building.

Alec gets out first, getting Magnus’ door for him. He stands gracefully not even needing the sunglasses anymore to block his eyes from the bright sun.

“So, I guess I’ll see you at Helen and Aline’s wedding in a couple weeks?” Alec says as Magnus stretches out his arms.

“Yeah, see you then,” Magnus says with a smile before turning and heading to his front door. Alec rounds his car once again when Magnus’ voice stops him as he opens the door.

“Alec?” he says turning back around the end of his sunglasses between his teeth clearly in thought. “What if we went together?”

“Went to what together?” Alec questions closing his car door and leaning his arms on the roof.

“Helen and Aline’s wedding, and well, all the other one’s too,” Magnus says stepping closer to the car. Alec raises an eyebrow and Magnus quickly adds on. “I mean as friends obviously, but we can mark the little date box on everything and not get stuck at singles tables.”

Alec takes a breath and thinks it’s not the worst idea. They’re close enough to keep each other company and play offense against any nagging relatives or friends that want to enquire on their singleness. Magnus is pretty much the only person outside of Isabelle he’d want to spend that much time with at events he only kind of wants to be at anyways.

“Plus,” Magnus continues on not realizing he’s basically already sold Alec on this idea. He reaches the car again and leans on the passenger side mirroring Alec. “We could split the cost on everything, rooms, travel all of it. Having a friend to get through it all and saving some money wouldn’t be so bad, right?”

Alec smiles with a shake of his head. “That’s a pretty great idea.”

“Really?” Magnus says a smile of his own forming on his face.

“Yeah, it’ll be fun taking on the hells of married people together,” Alec says. “Especially the straight ones.” He adds on with a laugh.

Magnus responds in kind before he rounds the front of the car, Alec does the same until they’re standing right in front of one another.

“So, be my wedding date for the summer?” he says holding out a hand to Alec with a smile.

“Only if you’ll be mine,” Alec replies taking Magnus’ hand with a soft agreeing grasp. And for the first time since each wedding invitation arrived in his mailbox he feels a little bit excited about attending each and every one.

***

Helen & Aline ~ May 15th, Napa Valley, California

Alec tosses his phone back and forth between his hands sitting on the edge of their hotel room bed. He hadn’t been expecting the news his mother just gave him. She’s getting married. It’s not that she and Luke haven’t been obviously in love for years now, but part of Alec thought she’d never take the full plunge again, not after how terrible her marriage to his father had been.

But she’s doing it and she’s not wasting any time already planning for the ceremony in October. More surprisingly she wants Alec to be her man of honor and to make a speech. It’s a big thing, a big thing that makes him even more nervous than speaking at Isabelle’s wedding did in some ways. For Izzy he had to get it right for what will hopefully be the only time, for his mom though this has to better than anything that was said at her first wedding considering how that turned out.

Magnus steps out of the bathroom looking damn good in white pants and a light blue shirt. Alec’s wearing a similar outfit just with a light pink shirt instead, as per requested by the dress code, and he feels like he looks ridiculous. Magnus looking as good as he does makes him feel this to be even more true.

“Everything okay?” Magnus asks nodding to the phone in Alec’s hand.

Alec nods. “Yeah, my, uh, my mom’s getting married,” he says and Magnus smiles. “She wants me to be her man of honor and give a speech and everything.”

“Woah, even after that long drudge at Isabelle’s wedding huh?” Magnus says jokingly.

“Ha, ha,” Alec says dryly with a roll of his eyes and Magnus just keeps that teasing smile as he rolls up the cuffs of his shirt.

“Let’s go we have to hike up like ten miles to get to the ceremony,” Alec says standing and pocketing his phone as he heads to the door.

Magnus follows and tugs the door closed behind him. “You’ll do great,” Magnus says more seriously, completely genuine as he reaches out flicking some invisible fuzz off of Alec’s shoulder.

Alec smiles thankful and holds out his arm for Magnus to take. Magnus doesn’t hesitate.

***

Alec and Magnus come to a stop when they reach the bottom of the hill that leads to the ceremony. Magnus slides his sunglasses down at the same time Alec does and admires the sprawling vineyard. Helen and Aline have gone all out or more likely it’s more Aline’s mother has gone all out. If she’s half as controlling now as she was in college, Alec assumes she did everything down to picking what underwear the brides are wearing.

“Who makes their guests walk a hill?” Magnus questions as a few other guests slip past them making their way up.

Alec shrugs and starts walking, Magnus falling in step right alongside. “You remember how Aline’s mom was in college, I’m sure she thinks this will build character for the guests or something.”

Eventually they make their way to the top of hill and find their seats. With all its sprawling beauty and extravagance the wedding is nothing but classy. Helen and Aline seem more and more in love every time Alec see them and in a way he envies that.

They have to make their way back down the hill for the reception and Alec only half-jokingly suggests that they just roll down. Magnus looks like he almost wants to do it.

For the most part the reception passes by quickly, they drink and catch up with old friends. Magnus even drags Alec out onto the dance floor a few times. It’s the most fun he’s had at a wedding in a while, all because he’s not doing it alone.

Every time the subject of his romantic life comes up Magnus is there to divert the conversation and Alec does the same for him, instead of being constantly reminded they’re single they have each other’s back the whole night.

“What about him?” Magnus says tilting his champagne glass towards the right. Alec’s eyes follow the motion to see a somewhat handsome dark-haired man at the end of the bar.

“I don’t know what about him?” Alec asks taking a sip of his drink.

“As a potential suitor,” Magnus says turning his attention back to Alec. “I figured being a decent wingman through this whole thing would be good compensation for the fact that I’m a bed hog.”

Alec snorts. There’s nothing in this world that would make up for that, that morning Alec had woken up with Magnus half on him and his own body half on the floor. Bed hog is an understatement to what Magnus somehow manages to do in his sleep.

Alec takes another look at the guy and grimaces a bit. “Pass, I try not to date men that look exactly like me,” he says. “Also, potential suitor, you’re such a nerd.”

Magnus flicks him on the shoulder for the nerd comment before taking another quick glance at the man at the other end of the bar.

“You’re right he’s like a less handsome you,” he says before scanning the room. “I’ll keep my eye out though.”

Alec has no interest in finding a potential suitor tonight, so he surprises himself and holds out a hand asking Magnus to dance just to distract.

***

“You know I’d say this was a complete success,” Magnus says later sitting cross legged on the bed while Alec packs for their departure the next morning. Magnus only teased him slightly for insisting to do this now and not wait till morning.

Alec looks up from his bag and smiles. “Yeah I had a lot of fun,” he says. Fun might even be underselling it.

“So,” Magnus says with a bright smile. “When’s our next wedding?”

***

Lydia & Raj ~ June 5th, Gatlinburg, Tennessee

“The gentlemen at the end of the buffet asked me to give you this,” Magnus says when he returns to their table holding out a pink napkin that smells of peonies to him. Alec takes it looking at a name and a few digits written hastily in black ink.

Lydia and Raj’s wedding has been a blast so far, everything here looks like a tricked out floral cabin and it’s perplexed them both to no end. The wedding itself has been the most heterosexual thing in human history, from the color schemes to the seventeen-tiered cake to the crazy scented napkins.

Alec never could have done this without someone else, specifically someone who’s not straight. Lydia has been a family friend since he was a kid, he’d even call her one of his closest friends if he really thought about it, but sometimes she’s so straight it baffles him.

Alec looks up at the buffet and sees the man in question, he’s tall, dark skinned and doesn’t look like Alec which is an improvement over Magnus’ attempt to get him laid at the last wedding. Alec vaguely remembers making some small talk with the man earlier in the night when Magnus had been engrossed in some conversation about art with Raj’s grandmother.

He gives Alec a bright toothy smile and Alec gives him a light one back pocketing the napkin. The guy seemed nice enough and is definitely good looking enough, but Alec doesn’t think he’ll actually utilize it. He isn’t however cruel enough to blatantly reject the man from across the room.

“I’m killing this wingman thing now,” Magnus says with a smile sitting down with a heavy plate of snacks for them to share. Under the plate is another napkin with the start of a number on it as well. Alec slips it out from under the plate and sees the name Abby written in bright red marker.

“Seems like you’re doing alright for yourself too,” he says handing the napkin over to Magnus. Magnus takes it from him with a shrug.

“The buffet was busy what can I say,” he says stuffing the napkin into his pocket carelessly. “Now try one of these little sandwich things, they’re to die for.” Magnus holds out one of the said tiny sandwiches for Alec and he leans over, Magnus popping the bite sized thing right onto his tongue with a smile.

They spend the rest of the night like that chairs close together, laughing and making up outlandish backstories for the stuffy rich people that surround them while snacking on every bit of free food that’s available to them.

“I’ve never seen a man look more like he’s the owner of a diamond encrusted toilet in my life,” Magnus says subtly pointing at a man on the dance floor who’s wearing an insane looking purple suit with a matching rhinestone hat. Alec’s not sure, but he thinks it might be Lydia’s uncle that runs a chain of furniture stores.

“Probably has a second one in gold too,” Alec says. Magnus laughs and looks down at their plate that’s been refilled too many times to count. The party is winding down, most of the guests starting to say their goodbyes and make their way back to whatever flowery cabin themed hotels they’re staying in.

It’s weird, but Alec kind of doesn’t want it to end, it’s something he’s never experienced with a night like this. It speaks volumes to the impact Magnus’ company is having on him.

***

The next morning they don’t even ask if the other had fun, it’s clear on their faces, it’s clear in the way Alec doesn’t even complain when he wakes up with Magnus hogging all the covers and his knee in his side.

This deal of theirs works, and it’s going to keep working for the rest of the summer without a doubt.

Magnus tosses a couple bottles of hotel shampoo into an open bag before he heads for the door his backpack slung over one shoulder. Alec looks around the room checking to make sure they haven’t left anything behind when he catches sight of the napkin from the night before on the nightstand and picks it up looking at the digits for a moment.

Magnus is already at the door back turned, his foot holding it open for Alec to follow. Alec looks at Magnus and then back down at the number. He bites his lip in thought for a moment before he crumples the napkin up and tosses it in the small garbage can by the table near the door.

He leans down to pick up their last bag that’s sitting beside it and catches sight of a second napkin next to his crumpled one. This one is barely folded with digits he doesn’t recognize on it and the last letters of the name Abby visible. He pauses with his fingers wrapped around the handle of the bag and looks up at Magnus who’s still standing in the doorway holding it open for Alec.

He thought that Abby was a sure thing, the woman coming around again later in the evening and asking Magnus to dance. Alec had seen them out there and for a moment thought he might be going back to their hotel room alone. He must have read it all wrong, he’s not quite sure why but he’s oddly pleased about that.

“You coming?” Magnus says turning back to look at Alec with a raised eyebrow.

“Yeah, yeah,” he says covering up his surprise at his find with a light cough and grabs the bag following after Magnus.

He allows himself a small smile all the way down the hall wondering if maybe he wasn’t the only one who had more fun with his wingman than anyone else last night. And that, that’s an interesting development.

***

Maia & Raphael ~ June 12th, The Ridge – Marshall, North Carolina

They spend the week between weddings constantly texting. Magnus is more than a little excited about this one it’s clear. Alec doesn’t know Raphael or Maia, but he’s heard a lot about them.

The flight to Asheville, where they’ll be staying and taking a wedding bus into Marshall for the actual ceremony and reception, is filled with Magnus telling Alec a thousand tales about the shenanigans he and Raphael have gotten up to over the years. Each new story, even if Alec doubts the full truth of some of them, makes Alec a little more excited for to meet him. Raphael is part little brother, part mentee to Magnus and it’s not lost on Alec that he’s delighted to see Raphael has found his match, found someone who doesn’t ask him to change anything about himself.

And his match she is, Alec sees it clearly when he meets the pair instantly getting along with the both of them. He and Raphael have similar grumpy demeanors that bonds them fast and Maia is a fiery soul that reminds Alec of his own sister. He gets Magnus’ love for them immediately and isn’t disappointed in the slightest when the four of them end up spending most of their time together.

They attend the rehearsal dinner for this one, while Maia and Raphael have opted for no wedding party Magnus is unofficially the best man. He gives a speech that night that sounds more eloquent than anything Alec could ever come up with. However, he doesn’t have it in him to not tease Magnus just a bit when he sits back down.

“Could’ve been shorter,” he says into his glass of water looking at Magnus playfully from the corner of his eye.

Magnus nudges him in the ribs lightly, “Shut it.”

The wedding the next night is beautiful. Maia and Raphael say I do just as the sun sets in a ceremony that is a perfect combination of Maia’s heathenism as she called it the night before and Raphael’s devout Catholicism.

Nothing is overly flashy or overdone despite the sprawling beauty of their location. The warm summer night drifts by easy and slow, Alec choosing to keep close to Magnus the whole night in favor of any sort of mingling.

“You two are great together,” Maia says smiling at Magnus and Alec as they chat with her under a sparkle of twinkling white lights.

“Oh we’re not together, together,” Magnus corrects her smiling at Alec quickly almost a little nervously before looking back at Maia. “It’s just like a friend thing, you know single people unite situation.”

“Right,” she says like she knows something they don’t know as her eyes pass between them. She doesn’t get to further on whatever it is she does seem to know though because Raphael finds them with a plate of food in his hands that he holds out to her like a precious diamond.

“Mi corazón,” he says looking at her with eyes so filled to the brim with fondness it seems almost impossible.

If he though Helen and Aline were in love-love these two are on another level entirely.

“Food! Real food,” she exclaims making grabby hands for the plate and digging in immediately. “You’re a saint, Raphael Santiago.” She adds on between bites.

Raphael rolls his eyes fondly wrapping an arm around her waist as she continues to eat. “I bring her one plate of rice and tamales and she’s putting me up for sainthood.”

They chat some more in the short time it takes for Maia to finish her plate of food before they re-enter the fray making their rounds to other friends and family. Magnus gets Alec out on the dance floor a lot as the night moves on.

First it’s a few fast songs that he just follows Magnus’ lead for and then a slow number that he can actually keep up with.

“I really like Raphael and Maia,” Alec says as they sway together, bodies close his hands linked together at the small of Magnus’ back.

Magnus smiles looking all too pleased. “Good, I’m glad,” he says slipping his hands down from behind Alec’s neck and to his shoulders. “They’re two of my favorite people in the world.”

Alec smiles, he can see why and says just as much. They fall back into a companionable silence after that just swaying to the sweet romantic song playing around them. He spots Maia and Raphael to their right not really dancing just holding each other and whispering things that makes the other laugh in each other’s ears.

“God they’re cute,” Magnus says looking at them too and then back at Alec. “I mean we’re cuter obviously,” he adds on quickly. “In a platonic adorable way of course.”

“Of course,” Alec says in agreement his eyes on Magnus. They hold each other’s gazes for a while till their swaying becomes more stagnant, more like they’re just holding onto one another.

“Alec,” Magnus starts and the music switches to something far faster paced, the dance floor getting a little more crowded. They pull back from one another and Alec lifts a hand to rub at the back of his neck, a nervous gesture he rarely does these days.

“I’m gonna go, uh, get another drink,” he says and Magnus opens his mouth to saying something but stops and just nods as Alec walks away.

Alec leans against the bar waiting for the bartender to spot him and runs a hand through his hair. He’s not totally sure what just happened, but he’s pretty sure that had that song gone on a minute longer Alec might have kissed Magnus. A tension has been building between them since Alec saw that crumpled up napkin next to his in the trash in Tennessee.

First the texts got more teasing, then there was the trip here that was filled with such joy and openness. And now, now there’s this lingering between them. They’ve been doing this thing as friends, but this trip has felt different this trip has felt almost like they were a real couple.

It’s a dangerous line to be playing at if Alec’s the only one feeling this way.

“Wanna get out of here for a while?” Magnus says pulling Alec’s head back upright. He raises an eyebrow in question.

“Evidently there’s a pool connected to the little hotel down near where the bus will pick everyone up and some people were gonna head over,” he explains and Alec nods his head. If Magnus wants to get out of here, Alec does too.

The pool is probably the least fabulous thing about this whole space, but that doesn’t deter anyone from jumping in fully clothed. Magnus introduces Alec around to few people that he knows making small talk before he himself hops in. Alec makes camp in a plastic chair at the far end of the pool watching as people slowly pair off one by one drifting down to the bus stop.

His eyes for most of the time stay on Magnus, Magnus who does a few laps and then lifts himself up with strong arms to sit at the edge of the pool chatting with a curly haired woman that Alec can’t remember the name of. She reaches out and brushes her hand across Magnus’ exposed forearm when he says something that makes her laugh and it sparks a twinge of jealousy in Alec’s gut that he’s never experienced before.

Magnus meets his eyes when he slips back down into the water and Alec looks away quickly.

“Alexander,” Magnus says slowly in a way that Alec doesn’t have the ability to ignore. His eyes return to Magnus’ the makeup around them a little smudged from the water and his once spiky hair is completely flat and pushed back away from his face. He looks impossibly good in the artificial lighting around them.

Alec’s always been aware that Magnus was attractive, he has two perfectly functioning eyes after all. But now here in this moment he’s never been more aware of the fact.

“Come on, get in,” he says and Alec shakes his head. A few others are lingering at the other end of the pool, but for the most part it’s just them. Alec’s not even sure what time it is, his phone discarded with Magnus’ dead one behind him.

He stands crouching over beside the edge of the pool with a shake of his head.

“I’m good staying dry,” he says and Magnus lifts up onto his elbows on the edge of the pool pretty brown eyes shining up at Alec.

“Come on, five minutes,” he says with a tilt of his head. “For me,” he adds on sweetly and Alec can’t resist.

“Fine,” he says trying to sound put out, but coming off fonder than intended as he settles down on his butt and takes off his socks and shoes. He slides into the pool next to Magnus and turns to him.

“There, happy?”

Magnus pushes off the wall and swims over till he’s hovering in front of Alec. “Almost,” he says just before he reaches out putting both hands on Alec’s shoulders and pushing him down with all his strength.

He submerges Alec and then swims away with a laugh. Alec pops up from the water shaking his head out like a wet dog and chases after Magnus catching him at the center of the pool by the ankle and pulling him back.

Magnus doesn’t fight it, just lets himself be pulled until they’re face to face again splashing a little more water playfully at Alec’s face.

“Really, Magnus?” he says with a smile splashing back at Magnus a bit.

“Really,” he says with a chuckle swimming around Alec once until he settles back in front of him. Magnus lifts his right hand from the water and pushes back the trusses of wet hair that have fallen in front of Alec’s eyes. His fingers drag through Alec’s dark hair and slowly move down across the shell of his ear and down till it’s settled on Alec’s neck. Magnus’ thumb falls a bit rubbing slowly at his exposed collarbone where Alec’s unbuttoned his shirt, his tie long abandoned.

Alec’s not sure which one of them leans in first or if it’s a simultaneous reaction, but between one heartbeat and the next their lips are a centimeter apart just about to touch when a loud honk breaks them apart.

“The bus,” Alec says as Magnus curses under his breath. They both swim to edge quick grabbing their discarded phones and shoes and making a run for it.

The bus is pulling away just as they reach the sidewalk, just far enough away that no one inside can see them.

Alec holds out his phone and sees the time, it’s just past midnight, he doesn’t know where the time went or how he lost such track of it. Magnus puts a hand on his arm and he is reminded of just why he lost track of it in an instant.

“That was the last one wasn’t it?” he says and Alec nods. Magnus sits down on the curb and slips his shoes back on. “Guess we’re walking.”

Alec sits next to him and does the same before pulling his phone back out and pulling up his GPS. As soon as he gets it connected to their coordinates his phone screen goes black.

He curses and pockets the dead device looking around.

“Follow the lights that’ll take us back into the city,” Magnus says pointing in the direction Alec agrees might be their best bet. “Once we get back to street signs we can figure it out.”

“Yeah, okay,” Alec nods and starts walking. They’re quite all the way till they reach the city limits just walking and enjoying each other’s presence. Or at least he hopes that’s what they’re doing, he hopes this isn’t actually an awkward silence after what had almost happened in the pool and on the dance floor.

The area starts to get a little more familiar as they walk, but Magnus starts to slow down his feet clearly getting tired. Alec can understand why with the heel on his boots being what they are.

“Hey, let’s cut through this graveyard, I’m pretty sure it’ll get us to the hotel faster,” he says coming to a stop in front of the large stone wall of the graveyard. The gate is cracked open and while technically they’re not supposed to enter after hours he’s willing to take the shortcut for Magnus’ feet sake.

“Through a graveyard?” Magnus says a little hesitantly peeking into the gates.

Alec smiles stepping up to Magnus’ side. “What, you scared?” he teases.

Magnus turns his head giving him an offended look. “I’m not scared,” he says assuredly. “Just a little superstitious.”

He leans down using one hand to stabilize himself on Alec’s arm and slips off his first shoe then switches and does the same on the other side.

“Magnus what are you doing?” he asks as Magnus holds his shoes in his hand.

“If we’re cutting through a graveyard, we’re running and holding our breath,” he says holding out his free hand for Alec to take.

“Seriously?”

“Most seriously,” Magnus says wiggling his fingers for Alec to take. Alec huffs out a little laugh and twines their fingers together. They step up to the gate hand in hand pushing it open enough so they can both fit through side by side. Magnus takes a deep breath in, holds it and then they’re off.

The warm summer wind whips around them as they rush through the graveyard, bobbing and weaving around gravestones as they go. Alec has to take a breath when they narrowly dodged a large epitaph and laughs.

Magnus joins in with him just as Alec trips himself up over a small epitaph just barely sticking up from the ground and lands face first into the grass.

“Alexander!” Magnus startles as their hands separate. He falls to his knees at Alec’s side as Alec turns over looking up at the stars and then at something much brighter.

“Ow,” he says when he meets Magnus’ eyes. Magnus giggles falling down into the grass beside him.

“Well so much for getting through quickly huh?” he says between giggles and Alec can’t help but join in. Magnus rolls to his side, pushing up close against Alec. He lifts himself up on an elbow and looks down at Alec still giggling just a bit. He moves one leg to tangle with Alec’s.

It’s not the first time they’ve been this close, they’ve woken up in the same bed numerous times now and they were even closer than this not but an hour ago in the pool. But something about this, about this carefree laughter and silly superstitions feels even more intimate.

Alec lifts himself up just enough for their lips to meet. There’s no hesitation on Magnus’ end, their lips slide together slow and easy until Magnus’ tongue trails along the seam of Alec’s lips. He opens his mouth to Magnus easy and falls back bringing Magnus along with him.

Magnus moves with him like it’s as natural as breathing resituating himself until he’s straddling one of Alec’s thighs. He can feel Magnus growing hard against his leg as they kiss making Alec rut his own hardness up against him.

Alec lets his hands drift to Magnus’ waist untucking his shirt and letting his hands drift up to naked skin. Magnus moves his hands down as well unfastening Alec’s belt. Alec gets with the program working at the buttons on Magnus’ pants as well.

They pull back before either of them go any further a question in both their eyes.

“Can I?” they say at the same time and start laughing. Magnus presses his forehead to Alec’s as they laugh hands still lingering at the edge of his briefs.

“Yes,” Alec says enthusiastically when his laughter settles down. He leans in kissing Magnus fast and hard once before he pulls back again. “Yes.”

***

Alec wakes to the whirring sound of a lawnmower. He peels opens his eyes to see the blinding rising sun. Magnus is cuddled up against his side, his head on Alec’s chest. Alec lifts a hand smiling as he runs a hand through Magnus’ hair. For a moment he forgets where they are until the lawnmower gets far too close to his head.

Alec watches as a graveyard groundskeeper cuts around them like they’re just a part of the grounds and Magnus grumbles.

“Magnus,” Alec says shaking his shoulder gently. “We gotta go Magnus.”

He moves slowly lifting his head up from Alec’s chest and squinting at the sun. He looks beautiful in the morning light, all bleary eyed and sleep warm. Alec doesn’t remember falling asleep here, doesn’t remember much after his mind-blowing orgasm and the look on Magnus’ face as he followed close behind. Evidently though they fell fast asleep not long after that.

He smiles despite the grass stains no doubt on his clothes and the ache in his back from laying half on the corner of hard stone. Magnus sits up, Alec following along as they help each other stand. Magnus reaches out with a chuckle redoing Alec’s belt, thankfully they’d had enough energy the night before to tuck themselves back into their underwear at least not giving the graveyard groundskeeper an eyeful.

They cut the rest of the way through the graveyard, which yes it turns out actually would have been a shortcut to the hotel if they had made it all the way through, hand in hand giving a passing wave to the groundskeeper who barely chances them a glance. It makes Alec wonder just how many times he’s found living people fast asleep here.

They’re in a rush once they get back to the hotel cutting their checkout time close, so close that they don’t have any time to talk. By the time they get on the plane to head back home they’re both still so tired they fall asleep almost instantly.

They share a cab once they land back in New York and Alec helps Magnus gather his bags from the trunk as they both linger outside of his building.

“So,” he says handing Magnus his bag their fingers lingering a touch as he does.

“So,” Magnus says in reply an almost shy smile on his lips.

“We should probably talk,” Alec says with a huff. “Maybe we can get lunch tomorrow?”

“I’d love to, but I have to leave for that business trip,” Magnus says sounding disappointed.

“Right, London and you won’t be back until the day before Hawaii,” Alec says sadly. He’d forgotten about the two-week business trip that will keep Magnus away, it’s why they won’t be flying to Hawaii together for Simon’s wedding.

Magnus nods his head. “We can talk then though right?” he says.

“Of course,” Alec says. Two weeks is a long time for Alec to think about this nonstop, but he can handle it.

Alec hesitates for a moment not sure what to do next, Magnus makes the decision for him leaning up and pressing a light kiss to his lips before turning away with a wave and a goodbye over his shoulder. He gives Alec one last look over his shoulder as he enters his building winking as he goes.

Yeah, it’s gonna be a long two weeks.

***

Simon & Maureen ~ June 26th, Oahu, Hawaii

Alec lands in Hawaii and just like the past two weeks his mind is instantly on Magnus. It should probably be on their old college buddy and his pending nuptials, but frankly he couldn’t care less about Simon right now.

They’ve talked here and there over the past two weeks a few passing texts and funny photos, but they still haven’t really talked about what happened, about what exactly they are now.

They fucked in a graveyard and it’s fine, it’s not weird, it’s not consuming Alec’s every waking moment or anything. It’s not. It’s just consuming about half of his waking moments and yeah, his wet dreams have gotten a lot more specific and star the same gorgeous man now, but whatever it’s still totally not a big deal.

He's totally cool with however this goes down once Magnus arrives in Hawaii and they see each other face to face.

***

He’s too jittery and eager to see Magnus to hang out in their hotel room once he’s settled in. He sits outside of the hotel at one of the little tables for far longer than he should head perking up every time a cab pulls through and being disappointed each time it’s not Magnus.

Eventually at least for a little while he distracts himself with the book he brought down to at least create the illusion of doing something other than eagerly awaiting his dates arrival like a dog waiting for their owner to come home from work.

“Oh my god, Alec Lightwood is that you?” a familiar voice says. Alec looks up pushing his sunglass back up the bridge of his nose to find Magnus hanging halfway out of a cab window.

“Oh my god it really is you,” he says far louder than he needs to pushing open the door. Alec huffs a little laugh and stands making his way over to the cab as Magnus hands a tip to the cabbie who’s pulling his suitcase from the trunk.

Magnus turns his attention. “It’s been what ten years, Cabo right?” Magnus says exaggeratedly as he bounds up to Alec tossing his arms around him in a tight hug.

He pulls back with a smile. “You look so different, the doctors finally figured out what to do about that face huh?” A few other hotel guests eye them questionably at that, but Alec’s focus stays on Magnus.

Alec smiles playing along, “Just like they figured out what to do about that hairline of yours it seems.”

Magnus shimmies his shoulders playfully thanking the cabbie as he sits his bag down beside him.

“It’s a miracle the things they can do with horse manes these days,” he says and the cabbie startles giving them both an odd look before he’s backing away and retreating to the driver’s seat.

“Hi,” Alec says with a smile amused by Magnus’ antics.

“Hi,” he parrots back finally speaking at a socially acceptable level. He looks down at Alec’s hands and snatches the book he’s still holding onto. “Did you bring a book to a Hawaiian vacation?”

Alec shrugs. “I was bored,” he says in his own defense.

“Aww couldn’t have any fun without me?” Magnus says using his free hand to tangle his fingers with Alec’s.

Alec pushes up his sunglasses and smiles. “Something like that.” They stand there for probably longer than two people should smiling at each other and swinging their joined hands between them.

“Be a dear and get my bag,” he says squeezing Alec’s hand once. “You have to show me this beach view we’re paying for.”

Magnus doesn’t drop his hand all the way up to the room only separating himself from him when he catches sight of the big fluffy bed that Alec has yet to touch.

Magnus flops back onto it bouncing a bit as he lands. He spread eagles out moving his arms back and forth like he’s making a snow angel.

“Well this is fancy,” he says smiling as he lifts himself up from the bed. He takes a moment to look out at the view as Alec looks at him before he catches sight of the bouquet of roses and chilled champagne sitting on the table.

“Was this you?” he asks turning back to Alec.

“Complimentary for all the wedding guests, but I’ll happily take credit if it scores me some romantic points,” Alec says just putting it out there. He’s been thinking about this, about Magnus nonstop for two weeks now and even though he’s not sure why it’s happening now he’s okay with this happening. He wants to try this with Magnus, something about them has always clicked and now it just clicks a little more.

Magnus runs his fingers over the petals of one of the roses before stepping over to Alec wrapping his arms around his waist.

“The way you’ve been looking at me since I hung my head out of that cab is earning you more romantic points than this would anyway,” he says. Alec leans down just a little hesitant to place a light kiss to Magnus’ lips.

“About what happened in North Carolina,” Alec starts as he rests his hands on Magnus’ shoulders.

“I don’t regret it,” Magnus says quickly.

“Neither do I.”

“Good, so should we maybe do it again some time? Preferably not in a graveyard,” Magnus says his finger unlinking behind Alec’s back to rub up and down slowly. Alec tenses at that, if Magnus just wants to keep having sex Alec’s not sure he could handle that. As much as he wants Magnus he’s never been good at separating sex and feelings and there’s no way in hell he could do that with Magnus. They’ve become too tangled up in one another lately for that.

Magnus must sense his tension though because he quickly continues on. “And other stuff too, you know like hand holding, cuddling, double date brunches with people we really don’t like and low-lit dinners.”

“So, like a relationship?” Alec says lifting his hands to cup Magnus’ neck.

“Yeah, one of those,” Magnus says leaning in to Alec’s touch. “If you want to try.”

Alec nods his head maybe a little too enthusiastically and Magnus chuckles. “I want to try,” he says before leaning in to kiss Magnus again.

***

They wander around the hotel for a while after they talk Alec’s arm slung over Magnus’ shoulder and Magnus’ hand in one of his back pockets like they’re some sort of teen rom com couple. It’d be cheesy if Alec didn’t like it so much.

Magnus tells him all about being back in London and how it felt odd that it didn’t feel like home anymore, which makes Alec a little sad for Magnus, but happy knowing that it means Magnus is staying put in New York.

Eventually they head down to the hotel bar meeting up with one of Alec’s lacrosse buddies that Magnus had never met when they were all at college together and his fiancé.

“Say what you will about us as people, but a queer couple would never make you travel this damn much for a wedding,” Victor says resting his hand on Elias’ thigh.

“Clearly you weren’t invited to Lorenzo and Andrew’s Canadian dream then,” Alec says with a disgruntled sigh, he’s not looking forward to that one at the summer’s end.

Victor chuckles, “Matter of fact I was not invited to that one, Lorenzo still hasn’t gotten over the fact I shagged his fiancé three full years before they even met.”

“Well, then how’d Alec get invited to that one, he did the same thing?” Elias says twisting the umbrella from his drink between his teeth.

Magnus turns to Alec with glee. “You did what now?”

Alec shakes his head furiously. “I did not! Fuck you very much Elias, I have better taste than your fiancé does, I turned blondie down after he fairly aggressively hit on me ten seconds after Vic dumped him.”

“Damn,” Magnus says with a sigh leaning a little closer to Alec. “We could have caused a real scandal at that one if you had.”

“Okay Alec what the hell? Why did you never bring Magnus around to hang with us in college, he’s my new favorite person,” Victor says with a laugh. Magnus raises his glass in his direction in thanks.

“That’s exactly why. I needed you to be my friend so I could cheat off your math homework to stay on the team and you’d have ditched me to hang out with him without thought,” Alec says pointedly and Victor concedes with a ‘you got me there’ shrug of his shoulders.

They stay at the bar till late drinking out of coconuts and trading stories with Victor and Elias until the other couple decides to call it a night. They head back to their room and get into their pajamas falling into bed together. For a moment they stay on their own sides of the bed just like they always have when sharing a bed, or at least have when they first go to bed how they wake up is between their sleeping selves, until Alec reaches out for Magnus because he can.

Magnus shuffles up close to him until they’re chest to chest and they fall asleep tangled together purposefully for the first time.

***

"How tacky would it be to steal all of these towels?" Alec asks from the bathroom as he ties one around his waist. He’s happy, hasn’t been able to take the smile off his face since he woke up in the morning with his head on Magnus’ chest and his strong arms around him. "Cause they're like heaven sewn into a towel."

"It's only tacky if we get caught,” Magnus says turning away from the mirror where he'd been fixing his hair to face Alec as he steps out of the bathroom still in nothing but the towel.

"Cool, we're definitely stealing them all then," he says and stops when he notices Magnus’ eyes dropping down, lingering, ogling really. That's when it hits him Magnus has never actually seen him without a shirt on. He's had his hands on Alec's dick, but they're graveyard tryst hadn't exactly given them time to get naked anywhere above the waist.

"Sorry, I'm back," Magnus says after a moment shaking his head, pulling his eyes away from the dusting of hair on Alec’s chest and the stark black tattoo over his heart to force himself to look Alec in the eyes. "I support you in all your towel thieving endeavors" he says taking one last look at Alec's chest before turning and walking over to his suitcase rummaging through nothing. Under his breath Alec swears he hears Magnus say a quiet emphatic "damn," and maybe just a little Alec privately gloats about it.

He gets dressed quickly, he and Magnus moving in each other’s space easily with lingering touches and quick kisses. The wedding is a lovely affair, Simon stumbles over his vows and Maureen doesn’t mind, she just laughs when a particularly hard wind comes through and nearly blows Simon’s yarmulka off his head catching it and pinning it back into his hair softly.

They spend the ceremony like a real couple, which ironically isn’t all that different from the way they were at the last wedding. They do shots with Victor and Elias and Alec gets to taste the tang of lime on Magnus’ lips when they’re done.

They slow dance a little slower and kiss this time though which is nice and when Magnus feeds him hors d'oeuvres he playfully bites at Magnus’ fingertips.

They don’t linger long at the reception both equally as eager to get back to their room and be alone. They don’t waste any time when they get there the door shut firmly behind them without pause. Alec pushes Magnus up against the closed door without hesitation kissing him for all he’s worth and pushing at his jacket.

It doesn’t take long for them to fall into bed both completely naked.

Magnus' reaction to Alec's bare chest pales in comparison to the no doubt slack jawed look Alec is sporting now. Alec's never seen anyone who looks like they were actually cut from marble before, Magnus' chest is like a damn Greek god. He always knew Magnus was fit could tell from the teases of skin he's seen over the years when Magnus would sport something particularly low cut, but the glimpses never could have prepared him for the full view. Alec dated a literal male model for a brief time a few years ago and even he couldn’t hold a candle to every bit of downright gorgeous that Magnus is. If Alec ever had any doubts that he was gay the vision of a naked Magnus straddling his lap makes him 1000% certain.

It's intense, but in the best possible ways. If they're graveyard quickie hadn't left Alec's mind for weeks this, this is going to be imprinted in his mind for the rest of his life. It's just him and Magnus and endless hours on soft sheets. He put his lips on every inch of Magnus' skin committing every pleased sound to memory, runs his hands over every dip and curve making a pathway he hopes to memorize as he goes. He gives it all, puts his whole self into making Magnus feel good. And Magnus, goddamn does Magnus give right back.

All it takes is one full night together and he's pretty sure Magnus has ruined him wholly and completely for any other man.

***

The glow of them being together doesn’t fade away when they get back from Hawaii like Alec feared it might. Dating Magnus in the city is just as good.

They get takeout and watch bad tv together on his couch, they even manage to get drinks with Izzy and Meliorn one night. It’s an easy thing almost like they’ve been double dating for years.

It’s all so easy the transition from friends to couple and for a good long while Alec doesn’t even get in his own head about how easy it’s been.

***

Lorenzo & Andrew ~ July 3rd, The Royal Conservatory of Music – Toronto, Canada

“I’d bet Andrew cheats on him before they hit their second year,” Alec says idly watching the couple as Lorenzo snips at something Andrew says.

“Alexander,” Magnus says chidingly stealing away his glass of champagne and sipping from it. “You can’t say that at their wedding, it’s so cynical.”

“Oh I can and I just did,” he says with a smile stealing his drink back from Magnus.

“Just because they’re,” Magnus pauses looking at them as Lorenzo straightens out Andrew’s tie, Andrew looking increasingly annoyed at Lorenzo’s micromanaging. “Unconventionally happy, doesn’t mean it’s doomed.”

“True,” Alec says sliding his glass back over to Magnus after he takes a drink of his own. “It’s doomed because Andrew has the ability to commit to monogamy the way a shark can commit to giving up living underwater, just ask Victor, and Lorenzo is an overbearing windbag.”

Magnus snorts covering his mouth to hide his obvious laughter. Alec smiles wrapping an arm around Magnus’ waist and pulling him closer to his side. This wedding has been ridiculous, a tacky nightmare of two personalities that clash so much Alec can’t fathom how they lasted this long. If it weren’t for the open bar, the giant complimentary gift basket back at their hotel room and the way Magnus looks in his auburn suit Alec would be questioning why they even made this trip all the way out here.

“You wanna get out of here soon?” Magnus asks discarding their shared glass on a passing ornate tray with a smile.

“Definitely, but I’m gonna steal some more of those shrimps before we go though,” Alec says already heading for the buffet with full intentions to stack a plate as high as he can and feed them to Magnus in bed.

***

Ragnor & Catarina ~ July 17th, San Francisco, California

Alec doesn’t realize he’s nervous about the San Francisco trip until he lands in San Francisco. This isn’t just some wedding of a college friend; this is meeting Magnus’ family. This is Magnus’ hometown; his sister is getting married to one of the friends he met in London that made London feel like home right in his mother’s backyard.

This is more than a wedding; this is Magnus bringing Alec home to meet his family like real boyfriend’s do. This is five days of Magnus showing Alec the places he liked to go to when he was younger, telling him stories about the streets where he used to ride his bike. This is what Alec does every day they spend together in New York when they pass by some place he has a memory, but packed into just five days. Even more so it’s Magnus really showing Alec a piece of him he’s never gotten to see. This is a man who despite his outward life of the party vibe is actually quite closed off saying to Alec here I am please still like what you see.

This is serious, because they are serious now Alec realizes, with each passing day Alec becomes more and more infatuated with his boyfriend. He won’t say he’s in love just yet, but that’s what this is.

“They’re gonna love you,” Magnus says reassuringly as they stand on the front steps of his childhood home.

Alec looks at him and lets out a deep breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding.

“Mom’s gonna love you instantly it’s in her nature and Rag and Cat will hound you but I promise it’s only because they’re tired of hearing me talk about you,” Magnus says squeezing his hand once. “You got this.”

Alec nods his head and takes another deep breath before putting on his best win the boyfriends family over smile. Magnus smiles a happy little smile at him before pushing the front door open and pulling Alec inside.

In an instant there’s a woman turning the corner with a big, bright smile on her face rushing towards Magnus.

“My baby!” she shouts barreling into him and holding him tight. A little too tight it seems judging from struggling, but fond look on Magnus’ face.

“Hi mama,” Magnus says when she finally pulls back. She lifts up a hand and pats him on the face once before running her fingers along his goatee.

“This is new,” she says observing the look. “It suits you.” Magnus smiles pleased.

His mother turns from him and sets her eyes on Alec seriously looking him up and down once, twice before turning back to her son. Magnus looks so much like her and it’s especially clear in the way she looks when she’s in deep thought, sizing up something or someone and forming an opinion. He’s seen that exact look on Magnus’ face a number of times, even on himself when they met for the first-time years ago.

“So tall, and quite handsome,” she says turning back to Magnus with another big smile. She turns away from him and puts her arms around Alec pulling him into a hug. She’s about the same height and build as his mother when she doesn’t wear those sensible heels she’s prone to so Alec’s reaction to hug her back is immediate.

“I’m Nadira. It’s nice to meet you Alec,” she says pulling back from him. “Well I guess meet you again. Drop your bags, come along I’ll get you some tea.”

She grabs Magnus’ hand and gestures for them both to follow her along into the kitchen.

“You remember the first time?” Alec says as he trails along after them. She pulls out two chairs for them to sit in and gently pushes them forward to take a seat as she flits about the kitchen fetching them some tea.

“Of course,” she says as she turns around attempting to juggle three mugs. Alec jumps up to help her and she smiles at him in thanks when he takes two of the mugs, keeping one for himself and handing Magnus the other.

“So, polite,” she says with a smile towards Magnus before she takes her seat. “Anyways, yes I remember you. You were still growing into that handsome face, but just as polite that parent’s weekend at NYU. All of Magnus’ other friends were hooligans, but you called me ma’am and held doors open for me.”

Alec smiles putting his hands around his mug. “I was just doing what any decent person would.”

“Exactly, it made you stand out,” she says. She reaches out laying a hand on one of Magnus’. “Plus you two were so cute together, I’m surprised this,” she says gesturing between them. “Didn’t happen sooner.”

Alec looks at Magnus unsure of what to say. People here and there have been saying as such since they officially got together in Hawaii and Alec to started to wonder about it himself.

Magnus just shrugs. “I guess we happened when we happened,” he says and then the conversation shifts. Magnus and his mom catch up while she asks questions here and there of Alec wanting to get to know him better.

***

“So, do my west coast ways live up to your east coast snobbery?” Magnus teases as he kicks his legs out swinging them back and forth.

They’re sitting on the edge of his and Catarina’s childhood “treehouse” it’s more of a cabin than a treehouse really, but any argument about the semantics of its design died on Alec’s lips when he saw his boyfriend and Cat jump inside both really too tall to fit now but squeezing in anyways. Magnus had just looked so damn carefree and happy that Alec couldn’t stop smiling.

From there they’ve spent two days just exploring the city, Magnus taking Alec to all his favorite spots, showing him the little corners that tourists don’t get to see that he and Cat would spend hours just wasting time away in.

Of course there’s been wedding duties and huge family dinners as well that have felt so easy. Cat and Ragnor have welcomed him in like family just as Magnus’ mother had from moment one.

Alec laughs. “With the food your mother has been feeding me alone, and you can never tell my born and bred New York family this, I would happily convert into a California guy.”

Magnus smiles one of those private bright little smiles he does and wraps his arm around Alec’s leaning his head on his shoulder.

Alec places a kiss on his hair and smiles. Things with Magnus are just so easy, sometimes he wonders if it’s almost too easy.

***

The night before the wedding is a frenzy of decorating the backyard and attempting to the cover it all with tarps in the hopes no raccoons will wreak havoc on their hard work. Magnus is moving nonstop, Alec isn’t even sure what he’s doing half the time, but he watches from the sidelines fondly lending a hand whenever his height is needed.

“Well you’re in love-love with him then aren’t you?” Ragnor says coming up behind Alec and startling him from his post happily just watching Magnus flit about the backyard. He turns to Ragnor stumbling over his words a bit.

“It’s not like, we’re not,” he says and Ragnor just waves him off with a chuckle and an amused shake of his head.

“Sure you’re not,” he says. Alec starts to try and explain, it’s not that he’s not very fond of Magnus and it’s not that maybe he’s there already, but it’s too soon. It’s way too soon to be showing his hand like that, things have gone so smoothly so far he’s certain dropping the L word so quickly would not be the right move.

But he doesn’t really get the chance to say any of that, which is probably for the better, because Catarina calls out for her husband to be across the lawn.

Alec leans back against the railing of the back porch again and finds Magnus once more. He’s crouched down talking to one of the daughters of an old childhood friend of theirs. Magnus says something that makes the little girl giggle before handing her a twisty little bouquet of flowers that he has in hands.

The scene makes Alec smile and just like that he realizes Ragnor is right, but it can’t be that easy can it? Nothing is ever this easy.

He knows he’s distracted the rest of the night thinking about Ragnor’s words and his own realization.

It’s not until they’re alone in Magnus’ room that he finally snaps out of it his attention solely on Magnus when he crawls onto the bed and straddles Alec’s waist. He trails his hands slowly up under Alec’s shirt and leans down placing a light kiss in just the right spot on Alec’s neck.

“Magnus,” Alec says trying to sound put out while turning his head to give Magnus more access to the long line of his neck.

“Alexander,” Magnus says breathy and warm against his neck before pressing another slow sweet kiss there.

“Magnus we can’t have sex in your childhood bedroom,” Alec says looking around the space, he makes eye contact with Magnus’ plush llama and shakes his head. Magnus lifts up his hands still on Alec’s chest.

“Why not?” Magnus pouts and oh, boy Alec is going to have a hard time standing his ground here.

“Because your llama is watching me and your mom is down the hall,” he says sitting up so that he and Magnus are nose to nose. It’s a bad idea because now his resolve is crumbling even more with Magnus’ lips so close to his.

Magnus leans over for a second knocking the llama to the floor.

“One problem solved,” he says with a smile. “As for my mom wells she’s a heavy sleeper, don’t worry I used to sneak out all the time and she never knew. As long as you can stay quiet we can do this, baby.”

Alec scoffs. “Me stay quiet?” he says incredulously. “As if I’m the loud one, I thought for sure you’d end up waking the dead in the graveyard that night.”

Magnus chuckles resting his forearms on Alec’s shoulders. “Okay so we’re both a little rowdy, it’ll be a fun game to play see if we can both stay quiet.”

Alec sighs and feels his resolve completely crumble when Magnus leans in and brushes their noses together.

“Fine, but one loud noise and I’ll leave you wanting,” Alec says flipping them over so that he’s hovering over Magnus.

Magnus hums pleased. “Keep talking like that and this won’t last long.”

Alec rolls his eyes fondly then kisses Magnus all messy tongue and teeth letting himself get lost in it, letting himself drown out the little voice in the back of his head that’s saying he can’t be this happy by accident, that somethings gotta give.

***

Alec promises himself that he’s not going to overthink for the day and somehow he manages to keep that promise. He ties Magnus’ tie for him in the morning and just basks in the closeness of it, he helps Nadira set out food for the reception and sings along when she starts her own little karaoke party.

He lives in the moment for the day, just like he had when things with him and Magnus first started, when he wasn’t overthinking how this happened and what could go wrong.

The wedding is by far the nicest one he’s been too of late because of its simplicity. There’s no flash or fanfare, Cat wears a dress she borrowed from her adoptive mother and looks more beautiful than any bride ever has. Ragnor dresses like a librarian and says vows that Alec can’t believe aren’t prepared. They’re incredibly in love and happy in the backyard where Cat and Magnus used to play and it’s perfect.

“Thanks for coming,” Magnus says while they sway on the deck of the treehouse, some slow 90’s song Alec doesn’t recognize but Magnus had gotten insanely excited about playing in the background. The lights in the yard twinkle in Magnus’ eyes and here in this moment it kind of feels like they’re the only ones here despite being surrounded by dozens of people.

“I know this was probably a lot with the whole family and everything, so thank you,” he says quietly tightening his arms around Alec’s waist.

Alec shakes his head. “You don’t have to thank me, I wanted to be here. With you. This wasn’t a lot, you’re not a lot,” Alec says truthful. Whatever the hell has sparked his sudden brain melt about this being so good and thinking it can’t be this good has nothing to do with Magnus or his family being too much for him to handle.

Magnus smiles at him pleased and a little surprised which makes Alec want to fight anyone that ever told him he was too much to handle.

“Good, that’s good,” Magnus says before laying his head on Alec’s chest. They stay like that for a long while, well after the song has switched to something more upbeat.

***

The five days in San Francisco move by almost too quickly. Before Alec knows it he’s getting another massive bear hug from Nadira and being handed a massive bag of leftovers that he has to load into the car. Leftovers that he knows they will absolutely confiscate at the airport, but he appreciates the thought nonetheless.

He shuts the trunk and leans back on it watching as Magnus says goodbye to his mother and now in this moment he’s back to slipping into his own head.

Alec looks at Magnus and he realizes he’s doing that thing he does. That thing where he questions something good that happened without any rhyme or reason, without him having to put any work in to make it happen. He’s the happiest he’s probably ever been and he’s questioning it, he’s questioning why it’s happened when it’s happened and what will inevitably go wrong.

He doesn’t want to do that with this, but he can’t seem to stop it creeping in.

***

Victor & Elias ~ July 31st, Brooklyn, New York City

“Earth to Alexander,” Magnus says waving his hand in front of Alec’s face. Alec shakes his head, once again overthinking just like he has been on and off since San Francisco. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” Alec says smiling so that Magnus doesn’t worry. Again this is all Alec’s dumb head, Magnus doesn’t need to worry about it. “Of course, ready to go?”

Magnus nods and holds out his hand for Alec to take. Tonight’s not technically a wedding Victor and Elias just didn’t care about the fanfare of it and plan to at some point get down to the courthouse, tonight is just for bringing them presents and drinking on a rooftop.

Magnus talks all the subway ride to the party telling Alec about a guy he works with who made a fool of himself earlier in the day. Alec listens like he always does, but he finds himself drifting.

He continues to drift when they hit the party only halfheartedly putting his energy into conversation with Victor and playful photobooth pictures with his boyfriend. Magnus notices of course giving Alec all these concerned looks as the night goes on.

“Or at least that’s what I heard,” Victor says finishing up on the rumor he’s heard about Lorenzo and Andrew already having problems.

“Well damn, looks like your cynicism was not misplaced,” Magnus says nudging Alec’s shoulder. Alec just hums into his glass in agreement. He doesn’t want his cynicism to be right, because if his cynicism about that was right then what if it’s right about how they’re relationship has been too easy so far. He wants to be wrong about that.

“Okay, what’s up with you?” Magnus asks turning his body to Alec. Alec looks up from where he’d been gazing off into his empty glass to find Victor and Elias gone.

“Nothing,” Alec says pushing back from the table. “You wanna dance?”

Magnus gives him a somewhat incredulous look. “Now I know it’s not nothing you never dance unless I make you, so what’s going on. Don’t think I haven’t noticed you’ve been having these moments where you’re so distracted ever since Cat and Ragnor’s wedding, so tell me what’s going on.”

He takes one of Alec’s hands in a tender hold and Alec says the wrong thing.

“Do you think we happened too easily?” he asks and instantly wants to put the question back inside his mouth.

“What?” Magnus says dropping Alec’s hand.

“I just, fuck,” he says running a hand through his hair. Now that he’s opened his mouth he can’t seem to stop. “Everyone seems to think we should have gotten together ages ago and I just can’t help but wonder why now and then it’s been so easy, so goddamn easy being with you.”

“And that’s a problem?” Magnus says. He sounds angry, not that Alec can blame him for that, but he’s keeping his tone controlled making sure to not draw attention to them.

“Yes, no, I don’t know,” Alec says his hands moving as he talks. “I mean good things don’t just happen and if they do I mean somethings bound to give right.”

Magnus laughs humorlessly stepping back a bit from Alec. “So what we’re doomed because we’re happy?”

Alec shuts his eyes in frustration for a moment trying to collect his thoughts to actually say something right.

“No, that’s not what I mean, I guess I just wonder if this is too good to be true,” he says dropping his arms to his side feeling a little defeated. That’s not what he wanted to say, that’s not how he should have worded it. He’s in love with Magnus and he’s scared that something is going to go wrong because it’s all gone so right so far and he didn’t even have to try to make it that way, that’s what he should say but he can’t seem to get any of that out.

“No I don’t think that, god Alec where is this coming from? All this time you’ve been here with me you haven’t questioned it, you haven’t second guessed it, so why now huh?”

Alec opens his mouth and nothing comes out so Magnus soldiers on.

“I mean do you want this to end is that what you’re saying?” Magnus asks a sad look in his eyes that Alec hates he’s the one responsible for putting there.

“No, that’s not-“ he starts and stutters out uncertain of what to say to fix this. Of course he doesn’t want this to end, that’s the last thing he wants that’s why he can’t stop thinking about losing it. He’s not lost on the irony that he was in his head about this falling apart because it’s been so easy and here he is the one making it fall apart because he can’t get out of his own head.

“Why are you suddenly questioning this Alec?” Magnus almost shouts.

“I-” Alec stutters out frustrated with this argument and with himself for starting it, for not being able to turn off his damn brain just once. Just for this one thing, this one good thing. “I don’t know,” he settles on running a hand through his hair tugging a little too hard at the ends of it.

Magnus huffs and just shakes his head. “Okay, well when you figure it out, give me call,” he says turning to leave. “But don’t wait too long, I know I won’t.” He moves fast turning for the exit before Alec can even get out another word. Before he gets the chance to say something to maybe convince him to stay.

Not that Alec has the words, he’s doing what he always does. He’s blowing up a good thing because he can’t figure out quite how he earned it.

***

Sebastian & Kaelie ~ August 7th, Lakeville, Connecticut

He doesn’t want to be here. He doesn’t want to be anywhere, really. He wants to sit at home and wallow in his sadness and think about all the things he should have said to Magnus and didn’t, about the fact that he hasn’t mustered up the courage to call him because he’s now worried he’ll just keep saying all the wrong things but Isabelle won’t let him. So now he’s watching two people he only kind of knows through family connections get married and he’s doing it all alone.

Despite the fact she quite literally dragged him from bed to be here Alec doesn’t talk to Isabelle the whole day. Every question she asks about Magnus or what happened he brushes off. He huffs his way through the ceremony his arms crossed and a no doubt upset look on his face. When Kaelie’s vows talk about timing and how it’s random sometimes it hits a little too close to home and he just barely refrains from getting up and jumping into the nearby lake.

Everything at this wedding sucks without Magnus so to make up for it the second vows are exchanged Alec is at the bar. It becomes his go to spot ignoring the concerned looks from his sister and ordering drink after drink. He orders a few more when they find their way to their table and he sees the little place setting beside his with Magnus’ name. He crumples up the paper and shoves it into the bottom of a glass of whiskey and still drinks it anyways.

The sun is still high in the sky and Alec is well and truly wasted sipping on his he doesn’t even know what number drink of the day at their little table.

He looks down at his glass determined to refill it and stumbles as he gets up from the table. Izzy is at his side instantly gripping his arm.

“Okay, that’s enough of that for you big brother,” she says taking the half empty glass from his hand. “Let’s get you some water.”

Meliorn stands at his other side and takes his other arm. “Let me take him.”

Alec watches as they have some sort of silent married people conversation with each other, he tries to open his mouth to defend himself, he’s not their child he doesn’t need them to take care of him but the second he starts to Isabelle is covering his mouth with her hand.

He sighs behind her hand and evidently their silent conversation is over. Izzy lets his arm go and nods at her partner.

“Get him some damn mints,” she says before sitting back down at the table. “His breath smells terrible.” Meliorn chuckles dragging Alec off to the side and through the little pathway that leads to a series of benches.

They sit Alec down and sternly tell him not to go anywhere. Alec waits till Meliorn is out of sight and tries to stand an action he regrets instantly when he feels everything start to spin. He barely manages to fall back onto the bench his head in his hands

“Drink this,” Meliorn says holding out a glass of something that smells of vinegar to him. Alec takes a sip and instantly grimaces regretting the day he met Meliorn.

“All of it,” Meliorn chides giving Alec a look that’s very akin to the ones he’s received from Isabelle since childhood when she means business. Alec grumbles a bit but complies downing the whole disgusting glass.

When he’s finished it down to the last drop he must admit he feels better, clearer, even if there’s a putrid taste lingering in his mouth.

“What was that?” he asks wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“A mix of kombucha and some other things, a guaranteed instant sober cocktail I invented,” Meliorn explains taking the empty glass and sitting it on the ground beside them.

“Does it make people instantly sober because they want to be clear headed enough to punch you in face for making them drink something so disgusting?” Alec says still attempting to wipe the taste away.

Meliorn chuckles and gives him that I know more than you do look he gives sometimes. “Sometimes,” he says before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a water bottle and handing it to Alec. He takes it gratefully chugging it down and swishing some around for good measure in the hopes that it can wash the taste away.

“So, shall we talk about what’s going on with you and Magnus?”

Alec shakes his head. “There’s nothing going on with me and Magnus.”

“Yes, that seems to be the exact problem,” Meliorn says brushing their hair over their shoulder. It’s blue now a change from the last time he saw them. “So, what happened? Isabelle and I are very concerned, especially after that little display.

“How did you choose to marry my sister so easily?” he asks evading Meliorn’s question. They hadn’t hesitated when Isabelle had proposed on a whim after six months of dating. Alec can’t even get out of his head enough to make a relationship that could be the most important one he’ll ever have last a whole summer.

“I just did,” Meliorn says magnanimously.

“You just did?” Alec says laughing a little hysterically. “That’s it? God, I wish it was that easy, I wish I could just make a choice and not question it. In my head something doesn’t just happen, you don’t just do it. There’s work and there’s planning and if there’s not then the other shoe is always going to drop eventually.”

He runs a frustrated hand through his hair wishing Meliorn hadn’t sobered him up so easily.

“Alec loving someone sometimes just is, it’s not that there isn’t work you have to put in because there is, but sometimes things just happen and maybe the other shoe, as you say, will drop, but when it does you’re not alone,” Meliorn says. He reaches out a comforting hand resting it on Alec’s shoulder, it’s a rare moment of touch for them aside from when they first met and shook hands.

“And what do you do if you’re the one who dropped the damn shoe?” he says.

Meliorn drops his hand and stands up from the bench. “I hate the metaphor, but you pick it up and tell the person you love you’re a cynical asshole who is very sorry.”

He walks away at that leaving Alec alone on the bench with his lips turned up just a bit in a smile. He thinks about what Meliorn said in his own unique way and with a bottle of water in his hand and the lingering taste of vinegar hell in his mouth he decides to take their advice.

He might not be able to stop being a cynical asshole but at the very least he can tell Magnus what’s been running through his head, how he got scared and questioning because he’s a little messed up when it comes to these things. He doesn’t know if he stands a chance, it’s been a long week of radio silence that Alec himself has caused, but he’s determined to at least try to explain. To find the words that he couldn’t that night when Magnus walked away.

***

Bat & Gretel ~ August 14th, Queens, New York City

Alec technically wasn’t invited to this wedding, he knows that. He was just supposed to be Magnus’ date and that’s it, but that doesn’t mean he can’t hang around outside in a suit with a bouquet of Magnus’ favorite flowers hoping to catch the other man.

He thought about doing this some other way, but calling or texting seemed empty. Showing up without warning at Magnus’ apartment felt like a thing he just wasn’t allowed to do right now, so he decided to be here. Maybe in its own little way it’ll be romantic showing up at a wedding with some flowers since this has become their thing now, since weddings are what got them started in the first place.

Thanks to the fact that all of Magnus’ friends follow him on social media now he knows the wedding is still on and Magnus is still very much going, it’s just a matter of catching him at the door.

He’s spent a week planning what to say, planning exactly how to tell Magnus why he got so in his head and why he blew it all up and vow to do better. He also really needs to tell Magnus he loves him because it feels so stupid that he never did.

He wrings his hands as he waits leaning up against the wall outside of the church he smiles politely at guests who pass him by twisting around every time he hears a car door to see who’s getting out of the next cab.

What seems like hours pass as he waits until finally a cab door opens and Magnus steps out. He looks gorgeous and Alec’s never been so certain of the fact that absence makes the heart grow fonder because god he has never felt so much from just looking at person before. He stands up straightening out his jacket and double checking that the flowers are still intact and that’s when Imasu rounds the cab from the other side.

He doesn’t hold Magnus’ hand or offer his arm, but it’s clear they came here together. Off all the fucking people in the world it had to be Imasu. Magnus could have showed up with the ghost of Stalin and Alec would have been less annoyed.

Alec watches as Imasu looks Magnus up and down, a borderline predatory smirk on his lips. Alec wants to scream, to run and to punch Imasu for this and about a million little things over the years all at the same time. Magnus smiles at something Imasu says and he knows it’s not physically possible, but he feels his heart fall right from his chest.

“Shit,” he says to himself; this was clearly a mistake. He tries to move fast, turning around to find a place to discard the flowers and get lost before Magnus can spot him.

“Alec?” Magnus says and Alec hears his footsteps getting nearer, there’s no making a run for it now.

“Shit,” he whispers to himself again before putting on a brave face and turning. He does his best to keep the flowers behind his back out of sight and out of mind, but Magnus notices them his eyes trailing across the tulips.

“Hey, Magnus,” he says trying to come off casual and missing by a few thousand miles.

“Alec, what are you doing here?” Magnus asks and Alec for the life of him can’t read him. He’s more closed off than even when they first met in college. Alec can’t blame him for that, he’s the reason he’s put back up the wall, but it makes his heart clench.

“I am here to give these flowers to,” he pauses looking around and catching sight of a little girl who’s just about to walk past them. “You, here you go kiddo.”

The little girl smiles up at Alec and takes off with bouquet calling out to her mother excitedly.

“You’re here to give Gretel’s little sister flowers?” Magnus says his arms falling to the side.

“Yup and that’s done so, I should go,” he says with a nod trying desperately to ignore Imasu.

He starts to move, but Magnus shifts just enough blocking his path. “That can’t be the only reason you’re here.” The walls fall a bit at that, Magnus’ eyes looking a little softer at him.

Alec sighs sadly. “It’s not, but the other reason doesn’t matter now I guess.”

“Of course it still-” Magnus starts, but he’s cut off by Alec’s phone ringing. Alec curses under his breath once again and pulls it from his jacket pocket.

“Hey, mom,” he says as he answers it his eyes still locked onto Magnus’ like it’s the last time he’ll get to see them. On the other end his mom is talking fast, way faster than she usually does. So fast that he has to have her repeat what she says three times before he believes it.

He hangs up a few beats later his mom giggling away on the other end.

"I gotta go. My mom is high at a mini golf course and needs me to pick her up," Alec says running a hand through his hair.

"Alexander," Magnus says his arm reaching upward. For moment it’s almost like he was contemplating reaching out to touch.

"I know it sounds like a fake made up excuse to avoid talking but I promise it's real," Alec says with a disappointed chuckle. "All I've wanted to do is talk to you for the past two weeks, to tell you how I felt." He adds on more somberly.

Magnus says his name again, so much emotion that Alec doesn't deserve in the one word. Alec waves him off stepping back just as he spots Imasu hovering just off to the side clearly listening in.

"It's okay you've got a date," he says nodding his head in Imasu's direction. Magnus barely spares his date a glance. "And I've got a high mother. I blew it I get it, it's okay."

He says it quickly not even hiding in his tone of voice how not okay it is for him before he brushes past Magnus and heads for his car parked down the street. For a moment he wonders if he should take one last look back, but he just doesn’t have it in him.

***

Alec slows down outside of the mini golf course double checking the address to be certain he’s got the right spot when he spots his mother running towards his car a few of her friend trailing behind. She pulls open the door before he even has the chance to stop the car fully.

“Hi sweetheart!” she says as she ushers in her friends all giggling their asses off before she rounds to the front hopping in the passenger seat. “Drive!”

“Mom,” he starts and she cuts him off.

“No seriously drive, the manager was not happy with our shenanigans, we are banned and we stole these,” she says with a big bright smile holding up a bag of multicolored golf balls. His eyes go wide before he focuses back on the road. He’s questions her, but his mother is clearly too high to care already rattling off addresses of her friends so that Alec can take them home.

It takes nearly two hours to get everyone settled in which is time his mother uses to finally explain that for a little early bachelorette party she bought some weed from the neighbor kid and decided mini golf was the best way to utilize it.

Soon enough after dropping off the last of her friends and making said friend take all the golf ball contraband but one it’s just him and his mother driving slow as the sun goes down.

“Where is the lovely Magnus tonight?” Maryse asks tossing the bright pink golf ball she kept back and forth between her hands. She’s always asking after him even though she’s only met him once before at Izzy’s wedding. She was smitten with him immediately; a reaction Alec understands wholeheartedly.

“We, uh, we broke up I guess,” Alec says trying not to think about the image of Magnus walking into that wedding with Imasu, fucking Imasu.

“Oh, Alec,” she says sounding sad and pitying.

“It’s fine, I’m fine,” he says quickly squeezing the steering wheel a little too tight. “I overthought it and ruined it, business as usual.”

“Sweetheart, I’m so sorry,” she says sounding even sadder than she did before. She tosses her golf ball into the backseat accidentally and undoes her seat belt crawling over the middle console to follow it.

“Mom!” Alec shouts as she stumbles her way into the back very narrowly missing kicking him in the face.

“I’m good,” she says triumphantly as she lands in the backseat making a little aha sound when she finds her golf ball.

Alec rolls his eyes focusing on the road as she settles in and leans forward her hand on Alec’s shoulder.

“It’s my fault,” she says with a sigh.

Alec squints looking back at her briefly with a raised eyebrow in question.

“Your father and I, we never taught you to accept good things when they come,” she sighs again squeezing Alec’s shoulder in comfort. “We always told you the only way to have good was to earn it, that there was always a catch when something just happened and to question it from every angle.”

“We made you doubt every accomplishment, every win, every little thing that made you happy. We made you skeptical,” she drops her hand from his shoulder in favor of leaning forward to rest her chin on his seat just over his shoulder. “We made you think everything through so much you over thought to the point of distraction; we made you bottle up all your feelings thinking it was for the best. I wish I could undo it; I wish I was a better mother to you all growing up.”

From the corner of his eye he sees her looking out the window a sad look in her eyes.

He doesn’t say anything though, because deep down he knows she’s right and he’s gotten a lot better in recent years at not giving her an out for the way she used to be, for the number that her and his father did on all four of them, him as the oldest in particular.

“I know it’s a hard habit to break, but sometimes things are just good. Sometimes things happen and you don’t have to work hard for them. All that cynicism and overthinking will only lead to a life filled with loneliness and you deserve to never feel lonely.” she says pausing to give him a moment to respond. He stays quiet and she carries on. “I know you’ve been thinking about why now when it comes to you and Magnus after all these years, that you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

Alec freezes at the red light and looks at her a little wide eyed. Damn if he isn’t his mother’s son and she can read him like a book when she’s paying attention.

“But sometimes the shoe doesn’t drop, sometimes good things happen without having to sacrifice, sometimes things take their time and happen at just the right time and you can’t overthink it,” her face transforms and she smiles at him. “Like me and Luke, all these years later and now it happens if it’d overthought it, if I’d questioned every little thing, I wouldn’t be here right now. A few months shy of marrying my dream guy.”

“Yeah, well I think I already blew it with mine,” he says finally responding to her.

“Oh, honey, you’ve only blown it if you don’t fight for it. Don’t think just speak from the heart it’s a lot better than bottling it all up and waiting for a fall,” she kisses Alec on the cheek making him feel like he’s five years old again just as the light turns green and he drives forward. She falls into the backseat laying down.

“Can we get taco bell?” she says suddenly like she hadn’t just poured out some shockingly coherent wisdom for a stoned woman who was just forcefully removed from a mini-golf course.

Alec huffs out a little laugh with a nod of his head, “Yeah, we can get taco bell.”

In the rearview mirror he sees his mother’s fist rise up triumphantly.

***

After their trip to Taco Bell his mother seems satisfied and a little bit more sober so he takes her home leaving her in the capable arms of her fiancé. Luke chuckles at his high wife to be when she offers him one of her quesadillas and salutes Alec in thanks.

He smiles as he watches Luke usher her and her bags of Taco Bell inside carefully before he turns around and heads to his car. He drives home quietly in thought thinking of how happy his mom looked with Luke or how happy he probably looked with Magnus before he obliterated it all.

But he wants to take his mother’s advice, take Meliorn’s advice once again. He wants to fight for it.

Alec parks outside of his lonely little brownstone wondering if it’s too late to call Magnus. To take his mom’s words to heart and just throw it all out there, no overthinking just him with his heart on the line and the hope Magnus would listen.

He gets out his phone as he gets out of his car thumb hovering over Magnus’ name when he hears someone clear their throat. He startles, his phone leaping out of his hand he just barely catches it before it hits the concrete when he finally looks up and there in the dim light of his brownstones stoop is Magnus sitting with his elbows resting on his knees looking far more beautiful than any person has the right to be. He’s still wearing his clothes from the wedding sans the jacket; it highlights his arms even more and Alec can’t help but look them over intently for a beat.

“Magnus?” he questions as he rises back to his full height, phone in hand as he meets Magnus’ eyes.

“Is your mom okay?” Magnus asks as he stretches out his legs.

Alec nods a little numbly, still trying to rattle his brain with the reality that Magnus is here.

“Yeah, got her a Doritos crunch wrap and you would have thought I handed her a bar of gold,” he says with a small smile, chuckling fondly at the memory of the child like glee she’d exhibited when he handed her the bag of food.

Magnus laughs a little, that small beautiful smile he does when he’s happy coming to his lips.

“Good,” he says with a nod. He pauses for a moment chewing on his bottom lip a little nervously. “So what was it you wanted to say to me? Because you didn’t play off bringing flowers to a little girl you’ve never met as being your sole reason for showing up today very well.”

Alec opens his mouth and nothing comes out, of course.

“Come on Alec, I’m not sitting on your doorstep for another mouth gaping silent treatment. You said if you just wanted to tell me how you felt, so tell me,” Magnus says a surety and forcefulness that’s oddly gentle in his voice.

Alec takes a deep breath and finally pockets his phone. He wrings his hands together nervously pinching the skin to ground himself.

“I have this tendency to overthink things,” he says. Magnus snorts at that, the ‘tell me something I don’t know’ clear in the sound. Alec just playfully glares at him before soldiering on. “And that’s exactly what I did that night. How we happened, when, if something could go wrong someday, it doesn’t matter. All that matters is we did happen, that if something did go wrong someday maybe we could face it together and then I just blew it up.”

He takes a step closer to Magnus, comforted when Magnus doesn’t even break eye contact.

“The short of it is that sometimes I’m a cynical mess, and I can’t promise I won’t be that sometimes, but I want to try so damn hard to not be for you, for us. And the long of it is I’m in love with you and it scares the hell out of me, not that that’s an excuse for how I acted or how long it took me to say all this to you, but it’s the truth and I just, I get it if I don’t stand a chance here, but considering you’re sitting on my doorstep I’m hoping I’ve got a little bit of one left.”

He runs out of steam at that and waits. The silence is excruciating in a way it’s never been between them as he waits and watches as Magnus twirls the rings on his fingers and thinks. Alec’s not sure if it’s minutes or hours, but eventually Magnus stands straightening out his vest. Slowly he gets closer and closer to Alec until he’s standing right in front of him.

Alec holds his breath.

“You do realize that if I give you another chance you absolutely don’t deserve it right?” he says reaching out a hand to smooth the collar of Alec’s jacket.

Alec nods with a little laugh.

“And you do realize that for at least the next two weddings you’re paying for the hotel all by yourself to make up for your jackassery, right?” he says this time curling his fingers into Alec’s lapels.

Alec nods again.

“Well, in that case you’re forgiven I suppose.”

Alec finally breathes and it’s a good thing too, because before he can even nod again Magnus is pulling him in connecting their lips. As their lips slide together, for the first time in weeks Alec feels happy, just purely happy.

It takes a while, but eventually they part needing to breathe, that silly living human requirement.

Alec’s hands move from Magnus’ hips where they’d landed during the kiss and slide around him pulling him in even closer into his embrace. Magnus tilts his forehead to Alec’s and smiles that small beautiful smile again.

“I’m in love with you too, for the record,” Magnus says after a beat his hands moving up and twining around Alec’s neck.

Alec smiles.

“Also I just brought Imasu to the wedding to make you jealous cause I had an inkling from some vague weirdness Meliorn texted me that you’d show up, he wasn’t actually my date or anything in case you were overthinking that too,” Magnus adds on kissing Alec lightly on the lips once.

He wasn’t actually overthinking that, he’s weirdly proud of the fact, frankly he’d forgotten entirely about Imasu the second he saw Magnus sitting on his front steps.

“Well it worked,” he says honest, even though he hadn’t thought it about since he saw Magnus here, that doesn’t mean he hadn’t seethed all through the drive to get his mother about seeing the two of them together.

“You always did hate him,” Magnus muses twisting his fingers in the hairs at Alec’s nape.

“He’s pretentious,” Alec says defending his dislike of the man, it goes far beyond his attachment to Magnus and all the way back to college. The second Imasu had played three different instruments in front of him just to show off and called a bowl of party snacks charcuterie Alec had not an ounce of patience for the man.

“He’s cultured,” Magnus defends with smirk, absolutely just teasing Alec at this point. It’s nice, it’s a thing he’d missed and craved desperately these last few weeks without him.

“That’s just a polite way of saying pretentious,” Alec with a roll of his eyes. Magnus laughs scrunching up his nose and getting impossibly closer to Alec holding him in a proper hug.

***

Luke & Maryse ~ October 2nd, Atlanta, Georgia

“So?” Alec says with a bright questioning smile turning his head to look Magnus in the eyes.

Magnus runs his fingers along Alec’s shoulder in thought as Alec’s grip on his waist gets a little tighter.

“Bringing up your mother’s ex-husband, your deadbeat father, might not be the best course of action,” Magnus says lifting his other hand up to brush Alec’s bangs to the side. “This is supposed to be a happy occasion.”

Alec rolls his eyes. “It’s a metaphor Magnus, you know about things not always happening the first time around,” he says pointedly making it clear it’s not only about his mother, but about them, about how they ended up here in the right spot close together where they were always meant to be.

“And while I appreciate that, love, I mean isn’t it a bad omen or something bringing it up?” Magnus questions hand now fiddling with the collar of Alec’s shirt.

“If I take out the part where I mention my dad, I have to rework the whole thing, babe,” Alec says reaching up to take Magnus’ hand in his. “The reception starts in like ten minutes I can’t commit a new one to memory in that time.”

“Fine, but if they don’t like it don’t complain to me,” he says squeezing Alec’s fingers once softly.

“Mom loves a metaphor she’ll get it, and Luke owns a bookstore, words, metaphors he’s all about that stuff,” Alec says with a smile, maybe it’s a bit of a risk, but he’s 99 percent certain they’ll like it. “Also, you’re my boyfriend I’m absolutely going to complain to you if they don’t like it whether you want me to or not.”

Magnus huffs out a laugh giving Alec a quick kiss before pulling away.

“Shall we?” he says holding out a hand that Alec immediately takes happily being pulled through the archway to the reception hall.

***

One Year Later

Magnus & Alec ~ City Clerk’s Office, New York City

“Are you sure?” Alec asks once more because he needs to hear it.

“Of course I’m sure,” Magnus says with a smile eyes locked to his. “You’re sure, right? Not doing that thing where you’re going down cynicism lane again?”

“Of course not,” Alec says a little defensively. He’s been working on that little voice on ignoring it and just thinking about the good, about the future they can build together. Not the what ifs or the how’s. “I just figured you’d want to do a whole party or at the minimum make everyone travel a million miles to our wedding since we had to for all of theirs.”

“Oh don’t worry my dear, we’ll have a big party somewhere down the line and make every single one of them attend somewhere far, far away,” Magnus says, he drops one of Alec’s hands and taps his chin in thought. “Like Greece or Aruba.”

“I like the sound of that,” Alec says pulling Magnus’ other hand back to him. He squeezes both of his hands with a bright smile. “So, we’re doing this?”

“We’re doing this,” Magnus says leaning up quickly once for a kiss before turning to the Justice of the Peace. “I know I’m supposed to wait till the end for that, but look at him, it’s hard to resist.”

The Justice of the Peace chuckles as Alec rolls his eyes.

“Magnus,” he says chiding and teasing. Magnus just smiles at him unbothered.

“Shall we proceed?” the Justice of the Peace asks. He’s been very patient since they showed up here with a marriage license and two freshly bought rings cracking jokes the entire time.

They both nod in unison stepping a little closer to one another. It all started at a wedding a year ago, a wedding that he thought might be the most important one he’d ever attend, but he was so, so wrong. This wedding right here, this spur of the moment thing in a courthouse is the most important wedding he’ll ever attend. And just like how Magnus made that one a year ago a little more special, he’s doing the same here when he says I do.

#my fic #malec #magnus bane #alec lightwood #shadowhunters #malec fic

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official-weasley · 3 years

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The Irreplaceable Charlie Weasley: Pt. 4, Ch. 1

PART 4: THE YEAR WHEN EVERYONE HAS A CRUSH Chapter 1 - Not-so-Muggle Charlie

Charlie

When Penny invited us to her house for the Summer and Nova received the letter from her aunt saying I could tag along, I thought this was going to be the best Summer ever. I don't recall the last time I didn't spend it at the Burrow and I was wondering who was taking care of my younger siblings as Bill was in Egypt and I was as far away from whatever Fred and George had in store this Summer as I could possibly be.

Going to Scotland with Nova was one of the best things that have ever happened to me. Not only did we finally have the opportunity to spend time with each other without worrying about homework or exams but like Nova did two years in a row, I witnessed a birth of an Abraxan now too!

She was right when she said that there was a lot of blood and to be perfectly honest as much as I enjoyed being a part of it, I don't think I ever want to see that again. The baby Abraxan was a boy and to make things even more exciting for me, Nova's aunt let me name him.

I think Nova was not as surprised as her aunt was when I named the Abraxan Dragon. She simply laughed it off and said that she had a hunch I might pick a name like that. Her aunt, on the other hand, couldn't wrap her head around why would I name a creature after another creature.

They also introduced me to Angel, who was now fully grown and showed just how much he missed Nova as he bowed to her immediately, wanting to give her a ride. It took me several weeks to achieve the level of trust she had with him and after swearing to her aunt that we will not tell our parents about it, did I get the green light to train him for our first flight.

I know it wouldn't be a complete dream come true as I always dreamt of how it would be like if I flew on a Dragon but I decided to close my eyes while flying and imagine I was doing it anyway. At least I was flying.

As much fun as Scotland was for me, I couldn't say the same for Nova. She was having fun and she was just as happy to spend more time with me as I was, but in the middle of our stay, she got a letter from her dad, saying that they found a new ancient tomb and due to the amount of work and taking care of his interns, he won't be able to see her at all this Summer.

To make matters worse, her mum couldn't get as much time off as she expected she would so they couldn't make arrangements to go and see her dad and Bill in Egypt. I decided to send an owl to my brother, asking him if he could report as much back to me as possible so that Nova would know her dad was alright and I also asked him if he could send us pictures so that Nova would at least get to see her dad that way.

Bill, of course, was having the time of his life. At first, he thought that the internship would be dull, some assistant work for the Curse Breakers, no action and adventure. But just after the first letter he sent home, we found out just how wrong he was. Apparently, Nova's dad was not joking around. After a brief introduction, he took them straight into a tomb and started showing them how they study and translate runes, a proper way to handle any sort of bottles found inside, and what to do in case things go wrong. He was ecstatic and I had a feeling Nova won't stop hearing 'thank you' from him all year round when we return to school.

—

My Summer changed drastically when the time to go to Penny's finally arrived. Their home was rather big but really confusing. It was as if it was a wizard's house but they tried to hide all things magical. They had something called a telly, which along with sound produced moving images, and every night after dinner we all sat in front of it and watched a movement, or something like that, I forgot the name.

We only had a Wireless at home and that was mostly so mum could listen to the news while she was cooking or knitting and for her to listen to her favorite singer Celestina Warbeck to which she sometimes made us dance along with her and sing the chorus of her favorite song, which of course we knew by heart but liked to pretend we didn't as none of us were rather good at singing.

It was normal that with all Nova, Penny, and I had to do around the house, we had to do it without magic as we weren't of age yet, but I couldn't understand why her mother was doing the same. Cooking using spatulas, using a sponge to clean the dishes. She liked to make things harder on herself.

Penny told us it was all because of her dad and I couldn't understand why because he was the most understanding Muggle I have ever got a chance to meet, not that I've met many. He didn't mind when we were telling Penny about Abraxans our first-night having dinner and he even asked me which Dragons am I the most excited to work with when I become a Dragonologist. He didn't seem to mind when Penny's sister broke a vase and their mum used a Repairing Charm on it.

Penny later explained that they were using as little magic as possible to be considerate to her dad's culture. As if I wasn't confused enough, my dad was bugging me, sending me letters every other day asking what new things I have learned about the Muggle world and wrote at least 3 questions each time for me to ask Mr. Haywood.

I didn't want to disturb him so much every single day and I found it rude to ask so many questions even though he didn't seem to mind, so Nova volunteered to help me and write back to my dad here and there.

To make me even more uncomfortable was Penny's little sister Beatrice, who was 10 years old. She was nice and I liked that she wanted me to read to her from my Dragon Species of Great Britain and Ireland book until Penny told me that she wasn't interested in Dragons at all and the only reason she wanted me to read to her was that she had a crush on me!

She sat next to me at breakfast, lunch, and dinner and stared at me when we were watching telly in the evenings. It was quite unsettling and I didn't know what to do as I didn't want to make her sad or something. Nova and Penny, on the other hand, found it highly amusing and were mocking me and making kissy faces every time Beatrice wasn't looking.

And what's even worst is that I didn't mind Penny joking as much as I mind that Nova did. She, out of all people, should know that I don't have time for stuff like that and that I want to focus on my studies as much as I can to get my dream job. And besides, the girl's 10 for Merlin's sake! I don't even feel old enough to have a crush, though mum did tell me once that girls develop faster than boys regarding these things but what do I know.

I am 14 and way too busy to think of that sort of stuff and to top it all off I was starting to behave rather strangely around Nova. I don't know if it was due to the fact that we were spending so much time together but every morning when she came down for breakfast, I felt this sudden rush of excitement in my stomach, and every time she laughed or giggled it made my heart beat faster.

It was getting annoying and I was on the verge of writing to my mum to take me to St Mungo's to do a check-up but I changed my mind as I didn't want to worry her and I was sure that it would get better once we return to school. It was probably just because I was in a different environment and Penny kept giggling at me every time she caught me blush, it had to be that!

Penny started acting strange one morning upon receiving a letter she didn't want to show to either me or Nova. It looked like she was up to something or that she was corresponding with someone. I have noticed on more than one occasion that she was scribbling something, blushing while doing so and every time their family owl brought her a letter, she squealed and rushed to her bedroom to open it.

Nova reckoned she fancied someone and if I knew more about these types of matters I would say she was right. One day when Penny was still sleeping, Nova and I made a plan to intercept her letter to see what was going on but when the owl came and we grabbed her before she could reach Penny and took the letter, we were disappointed when we saw that Tonks was writing to tell that she will be joining us the next day.

Penny, as clever as she was, knew exactly what we were trying to do and was mad at us all day. When Tonks finally arrived the next morning, her parents delaying her visit making her tag along to see some relatives down South, Penny decided to forgive and forget what we did the day prior.

I was relieved when Tonks was just as weirded out about how the Haywoods were running things. She was so nervous when she saw Mrs. Haywood washing the dishes without the use of magic that she almost broke Decree for Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery to do them for her. I was also happy to see that she would rather play a game of Gobstones outside than watch the telly as she said that the people in the box looked rather unnatural to her.

Having Tonks around made me feel better about my heart racing as well, which only confirmed my assumptions that this was all happening because I was spending so much time in a place where I have never been before.

The night before we were supposed to leave to Platform 9 ¾, rather sad that we didn't get to go to Diagon Alley this year as Penny's mum and my mum decided to do the shopping for us, Penny thought it was a good idea if her, Nova, Tonks and I made dinner for the entire family.

At first, we found it exciting, but when Penny brought out a book with Muggle recipes that didn't make any sense at all, even Nova couldn't hide her confusion and tried to avoid doing it.

“You are doing it all wrong.” Chuckled Penny when Tonks was trying to cut the garlic but her method was not called dicing.

Nova wasn't doing that great either as she took the whole 10 minutes to figure out how to turn on the stove using something called a lighter since to both of our shock, they didn't have matches at home.

I burned the onions because apparently, Medium was standing for how strong the fire should be rather than how cooked the onions have to be. Tonks made the mistake to leave a plastic spatula in the boiling water, as she was used to that not causing any problems to the spatulas they had at home, the plastic melted in the water ruining the spaghetti along with it.

In the end, Penny called someone on a bulky looking thing that talked back to you and it fascinated my dad so much I had to send him a picture of it, and 20 minutes later the doorbell rang and a man was standing in front of the Haywood house with 4 pizzas in his hand. Now that was magic if I ever saw some in their house!

The next morning I heard a couple of familiar voices in the kitchen. I rushed down to find my dad talking to Mr. Haywood not finding it rude to ask him everything he could possibly tell him about airplanes. My mum stood up at once when she saw me and gave me a tight hug.

“Charlie, dear I have missed you so much!” She ran her fingers through my hair, narrowing her eyes as I could already see she would want to cut it before I leave for school. I was happy that she wouldn't have the time to do so.

You see, I didn't want to admit it, especially not to Bill, but I was trying to grow out my hair so that it would look as cool as his. He looked so amazing with his hair and now that I was 15 I wanted to do something to hide my freckled face. Something Nova couldn't agree with me upon as she thought the freckles were what made me so cute and I couldn't make the creatures in my stomach settle down when she said that.

“How was your Summer, dear?” My mum woke me up from my daydreaming.

“It was nice, mum. Had a lot of fun with Nova at her aunt's.” I grinned.

“I bet you did.” She winked at me, her fingers still in my hair.

I hated when she did that. Even if I wanted to talk to her about Nova, I couldn't as she was always giggling or winking at me for Merlin knows what reason! One time Nova saw her doing it and she later told me that her mum was doing the exact same thing to her. She told me to try and ignore it, roll my eyes as much as I could, or simply distract her by asking a question on another topic. I was grateful for her advice as it worked 90% of the time.

“Anyways...” I started to say as I rolled my eyes. “I had fun here too. We watched movements every night on the telly. You know the box I told dad about in one of my letters.” Mum nodded.

“And yesterday we attempted to make our very own Muggle dinner,” my dad turned to me at once, listening, “but failed as we didn't follow the instructions properly and had to order pizza.” I ignored my dad's sparkly eyes. He eventually turned his head back and started talking to Mr. Haywood again.

Nova came down the stairs, making me sit upright, my cheeks bright red, something my mum noticed as she brushed my cheek and mumbled something about how I'm finally growing up. What is that even supposed to mean?

She pulled Nova into a tight hug and started telling her about all the things her mum told her to get for her in Diagon Alley, while Nova nodded.

Much to my displeasure, Beatrice appeared, what seemed out of nowhere, on the seat next to me, put her arm on the table, placed her head on it, and started staring at me. I heard my mum giggle as apparently, she knew immediately what was going on, which made me even more uncomfortable.

“Look Nova, you got yourself a little competition.” My mum nudged her, Nova as oblivious as I was to what that meant.

After breakfast, we said goodbye to Mr. and Mrs. Haywood, as my parents took the 4 of us to the station. Bill was already waiting for us there, looking rather disappointed that he had to return to school upon having such an amazing Summer already having his dream job. It was also my younger brother Percy's First Year.

Mum told us to keep an eye on him but we already knew that it won't be necessary as he acts like a Prefect at home already. Perce does love the rules and Bill and I have wondered many times who did he get that from. We all know that mum and dad weren't exactly angels at school either.

While we were waiting for students to board the train, Bill hugged Nova twice, making my stomach turn, and thanking her for what seemed like the millionth time this Summer, he then started to tell us about what he has been doing with Nova's dad.

He told us that they visited more than 4 tombs and that they only had a brief introduction before going straight to work. Bill was really proud when he said that 2 mates left as they couldn't handle fighting a Mummy, which one of the runes in their first tomb awoke. He, of course, took it rather well and he was confident to say that he was Mr. Blackwood's best student. He was also proud to announce that he will stop worrying about his grades so much as he found out he is perfectly qualified and will probably get the job as long as he continues with the grades he has now.

Mum was especially proud of him, not only how well he did on his internship, as apparently Mr. Blackwood sent a letter to my parents saying how well they've raised their son, but also because of Bill's O.W.L.s results. Nova and I couldn't help but chuckle when we found out about his results, knowing full well that he overreacted big time when he had a breakdown last year as he achieved:

O in Ancient Runes

O in Arithmancy

E in Astronomy

O in Care of Magical Creatures (even I was proud of him for that one)

O in Charms

O in Defense Against the Dark Arts

E in Divination

E in Herbology

A in History of Magic

O in Muggle Studies (this made my dad tear up, that's how proud he was of his son)

O in Potions

O in Transfiguration

What he was so worried about still baffled both me and Nova as even Percy was proud of Bill and that was probably the first time he ever said anything positive about any of his family members.

We then said goodbye to my parents and Penny, Nova, Tonks, and I started to search for Tulip while Bill went to his Prefect's meeting. Tulip was sitting in a compartment on her own, telling something to Dennis.

I have never seen her face lit up like that before when she saw us. She couldn't make it to Penny's to join our disastrous cooking so she wanted to know all about our Summer. We told her everything, including how Beatrice is planning to marry me which gave her quite a laugh. I, on the other hand, didn't understand why that needed to be mentioned at all. Afterward, we started discussing our Fourth Year. I couldn't help but drift away in midst of the conversation, just when Tulip said she heard that Zonko's has a new variety of Fanged Frisbee's, to think about Nova and just how much fun we were going to have in this year's Care of Magical Creatures.

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thegreatestofheck · 4 years

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Little Village pt.4＊Outer Banks＊

the first three parts are here on my masterlist!

word count - 2.7k warnings - light swearing and typos (it was way too late to edit this before I published it) synopsis - A doctor’s visit, a baby shower, and an early surprise. tagging - @apoguecalledjj @ijustreallylovethem @deathcompass @lolitstiana @ jxpiter-sxturn a/n - i’m sorry this took so long!! I was focusing on another fic, but now that it’s over updates for this one should be more frequent! I tagged a few people who showed interest, but if you don’t want to be on the taglist, just let me know! Stay safe, stay healthy, stay groovy!

***

“Routledge, how could you not tell me about this?” June’s boss asked, standing above her as she vomited in the staff toilet.

“I’m sorry, David,” June said. Her voice was weak from the vomiting. “I didn’t want to make things harder for you.”

“How far are along are you?” David Merchant asked, leaning up against the wall. June could hear the exhaustion in his voice as he pinched his nose between his fingers. She sat back, wiping her mouth.

“I’m due in a few weeks.”

“What?” He looked down at her stomach, trying to figure out how he hadn’t realized. “How-”

“High waisted jeans are a girl’s best friend, David,” June said. She tried to smile as she pushed herself off the floor. “I need this job, especially now. I’ll work until I can’t walk anymore. I hope you can understand that.”

David didn’t take his eyes away from June’s belly, even as she was standing.

“I understand, but-”

“Thank you, David.”

June didn’t wait to hear what else he had to say before pushing past him and returning to work.

By the time her shift was over, June was in a piss ass mood. Hiding her very pregnant belly at eight months was nearly impossible. Lying through it wasn’t working anymore. More and more people were finding it out. And that made the reality of her situation all the more real.

If the sickness and the cravings and the hormones and the swelling feet and the doctor’s visits didn’t make it feel real enough, people congratulating her as she walked down the street definitely made it feel like her time was running out.

She met John B and Sarah at the doctor’s for another check up. Usually, whenever June came around, Sarah had a large grin on her face, eyes always sparkling. June knew that she was still trying to impress her for John B’s sake and, no matter how many times June told her that she didn’t have anything to prove, Sarah always tried.

But this time, there was no smile on her face. Sarah tried to smile when June walked into the doctor’s office. John B wasn’t around as June sat down.

“What’s wrong?” June asked the girl sitting beside her. Sarah shook her head, her hair brushing against her shoulders.

“Nothing’s wrong, June.”

“Sarah.” June raised her eyebrows. “What’s wrong?”

Sarah sighed and lowered her head.

“I got a letter from Rafe today,” she said, her legs starting to shake. June placed her hand over Sarah’s. “Part of the program, I guess. He apologized and everything, said he was trying to do better. It just....”

When it was clear that Sarah wasn’t going to be able to say anything else, June gave her hand a squeeze.

“I can’t imagine what the last months have been like for you. But I know what it’s like to lose a father,” June said. Sarah glanced up at her, tears in her eyes. “You can always come to me if you need to talk.”

Sarah nodded her head slowly and then let out a laugh.

“You really are everyone’s mom, aren’t you?” She grabbed a tissue and wiped her nose quickly. June felt herself smile.

“I guess you could say that.”

“Ms. June Routledge?” The nurse called from the front. June turned toward Sarah, eyes wide.

“Where’s my brother?” She asked the girl.

“Said he had to go to the bathroom,” Sarah said with a small, nervous shrug. “I’ll come in with you. Don’t worry about it.”

June nodded and then stood, following the nurse toward the back. Sarah followed right behind her.

“You’ve turned down every chance to know the baby’s gender,” the nurse said, flipping through June’s report. “Do you want to know today?”

June shook her head.

“I want it to be a surprise,” she said as she tried to bite back a smile. Sarah sighed dramatically with a roll of her eyes.

“You know that makes planning a baby shower very difficult, right?” she asked, poking June lightly in the ribs. June laughed and swatted her hand away.

“I told you. There doesn’t have to be a baby shower.”

“Nonsense,” the nurse piped in, glancing back with a smile. “Every woman needs a baby shower, especially for her first.”

You found yourself smiling.

“You wanna come?” Sarah asked the nurse.

“You don’t even know me,” she replied, her cheeks turning a light shade of red.

“I’m Sarah. And this is June. What’s your name?”

“Beka.”

“Well, Beka, now we know each other. You wanna come to June’s baby shower?” Sarah tried again. Beka the nurse grinned as they slowed to a stop by the room.

“I’d love to come.”

Beka ran the usual check up stuff before exchanging numbers with Sarah and walking out to get the doctor.

“You are the most sociable person I have ever met,” June said to the girl with a large smile, settling herself into the bed with a heavy sigh. Sarah sat beside her and took her hand in hers.

“Anything for you.”

June’s eyes suddenly welled up with tears. She blamed it on the hormones.

“You are going to be the best aunt,” June said, a few tears running from her eyes. She wiped them away quickly as Sarah let out a teary laugh.

“And you are going to be the best mom.” Sarah leaned forward and pressed a kiss against June’s forehead, just as the doctor came walking into the room with John B on her tail.

“I’m so sorry,” John B said, walking around to the side of June where Sarah was sitting.

“Next time, hold your blatter, Little John,” June teased before turning to the doctor.

“How’s the baby?” the doctor asked, smiling down at June.

“Kicking a lot,” June said, puffing out her cheeks and letting out a heavy breath. “Especially when I’m trying to sleep. Keeps having the hiccups, too.”

The doctor laughed.

“That’s all completely normal.” She pressed her hands gently against June’s belly. “You’ve only got a few weeks left until you’re ready to pop. You ready?”

June’s mouth went dry and she squeezed John B’s hand. She really wasn’t sure. She hadn’t really decided yet if she was ready to be a real mom. She knew full well that she had a wonderful support system surrounding her and she had been practicing nearly her entire life for it. Keeping JJ out of trouble was enough like taking care of a baby, June presumed, but still, something told her in the back of her mind that it wasn’t good enough. She wasn’t good enough.

John B saw his sister’s pain and looked up at the doctor with a smile all his own.

“We’re ready for whatever comes our way,” John B said. The doctor smiled.

“Little Miss June and her baby are lucky to have you guys in her life.”

June let out a small sigh and gave a little smile.

“Yeah, we are.”

***

“I feel fat,” June whined, twirling around in the mirror. Kie grabbed June’s shoulders and turned her around to face her.

“You’re not fat,” Kie said, looking directly into June’s eyes. “You are carrying a literal child in your womb. Yeah? There’s a baby growing inside of you, give yourself a break.”

Tears gathered in June’s eyes as she nodded her head. She hated being so damn emotional all the time, but she couldn’t help it.

“Come on, girls!” Sarah said with a grin on her face as she walked into June’s room. “We’ve got a baby shower to go to.”

June let out an overly dramatic, exasperated sigh, but followed Sarah out of the room. Kie grabbed both of their bags off the ground and jogged after them.

June had never expected this many people to show up at her baby shower. Sarah and Kie were there, obviously. But Wheezie had come, too, along with Mrs. Heyward and Mrs. Carrera. Beka the nurse was there, even June’s doctor. All three of the boys had come, even though they weren’t technically invited. Ms. Lana had showed up, along with a few of the other girls June knew from the cut; Peeler and a few of the others. Seeing them all there made a smile grow on June’s face.

She had never been to a baby shower before, but she was sure that none of them could ever top hers. Kie and Sarah had spared no expenses. There was food and balloons and little games to play and presents. The boys hung out by the food most of the time, JJ munching on whatever he could get his hands on.

June was glad to have all of these people here, even when they were milling about, talking to each other. It was strange, seeing Kooks and Pogues talking to each other like old friends. Ms. Lana talked to the doctor, Kie and Sarah chatted with Peeler. Beka talked to the boys by the food table. Mrs. Carrera and Mrs. Heyward engaged in quiet conversation. Even in the quiet moments, June couldn’t help but smile.

John B sat beside his sister at one point, admiring everything from afar.

“Dad would be proud of you, you know?” He said, taking a sip of water from his cup. June turned to look at her brother, eyebrows raised.

“Are you trying to make me cry right now?”

John B shook his head and let himself laugh.

“No. I just thought you should know.” June cleared her throat to cover the fact that she did, in fact, almost start to cry. “You took care of me most of my life, I know that. Thank you.”

June smiled and reached out to take her little brother’s hand, giving it a tight squeeze.

“I wouldn’t have had it any other way, Little John.”

He leaned over and pressed a quick kiss to her temple before settling back into his seat.

By the time it was all over, June was overwhelmed with gratitude and gifts. But she was exhausted. If she hadn’t been pregnant, June would have been able to sit around a socialize for hours. But with the baby, after a few hours, June could barely keep her eyes open. She dozed off on the car ride home.

The boys helped her carry things into the nursery once they got home. Diapers and baby powder and milk bottles and clothes and shoes and toys and anything else that she could possibly need was set on the floor. By the time everything was inside, all of them were exhausted. Sarah and John B crashed in his room. Pope and Kie passed out on the couch. JJ was out smoking a joint.

June sat on the floor of the nursery, looking at all of the things that she had been given. Since her little village had given the room a make over and gave her the crib, they had scrounged up bookshelves, a changing table, and other places for storage to fill the room. With the bags all over the floor, June knew that she was going to have a field day sorting everything and putting it in its proper place.

Soon, the room would be ready for her little pogue to come into the world, with an entire family already at hand. That thought alone was enough to make tears roll down June’s cheeks. Before she knew it, she was sobbing in the middle of the floor. A hand on her stomach, June tried to wipe her tears away as they fell.

“I love you so much, Baby Pogue,” she said through tears. “And I can’t wait to meet you.”

A quiet cough startled June. She looked over to the door. JJ stood there with an eyebrow raised and a soft smile on his lips. June laughed and wiped away her tears.

“A few weeks feels like too long,” she said as she sniffled.

“Come on, Mamas,” JJ said, walking over to her and putting a hand on her shoulder. “You need some sleep.”

“Okay.” June let him help her to her feet and lead her to her room. “Where are you going to sleep?”

“I’ll crash on the floor,” JJ said, helping her onto her bed. Lazily, June shook her head.

“No, J,” she said, keeping hold of his arm as she winced and rolled under the covers. “God, I feel like a balloon full of rocks.”

“Well, you look hot.”

June scoffed and rolled her eyes.

“Don’t flatter me, Maybank.”

JJ smiled down at her as her eyes started to close. Her grip on his arm never loosened despite her drifting off to sleep.

“My arm is tingling,” she mumbled. JJ let out a quiet laugh. But it was clear to him that she wasn’t letting go until he sat down next to her.

“John B sees this and he’ll kill me, you know,” JJ told her as he lowered himself onto the bed beside her. June, with her eyes closed, gave a sleepy smile.

“Yeah, well, he’ll have to go through me first,” she mumbled. JJ scoffed and gave a small shake of his head. He lay there beside her for a few minutes, trying to contemplate what to say next, but by the time he had the words he wanted to say, June was asleep.

JJ gave her hand a little pat before rolling onto his side, his back facing away from her. It took him a few minutes to fall asleep, but eventually, he did.

***

June let out a heavy sigh as the boat pulled away from the dock. John B and Sarah were going on a date to the mainland. June hated to see them go, even though it was good of them to spend time alone together. For the past nine months, they had both dedicated nearly all of their time to June and the baby. She was grateful for them, endlessly, and she was more than glad that they took the time for each other.

But it left her wondering what she would do all day. She could rearrange everything in the nursery again for the one millionth time. She could got to the Wreck and eat half of the menu while she talked to Kie. Maybe she would head over to Heyward’s, take up Mrs. Heyward on her “free lemonade any time” offer.

Instead, June went to the beach. The waves were high that day, perfect for surfing. If she had been in any other condition than her current one, she would be out there surfing along with everyone else. But, alas, she was shore bound.

Watching was good enough for her though. She laughed when people tumbled into the water with a shout. She clapped when someone surfed a wave successfully, wishing more than anything that it was her. It didn’t take long for June to catch sight of JJ surfing the waves.

John B always said that JJ was the best surfer he knew. And there was good reason for it. JJ was born to surf. Even though June would never in a million years admit that he was better than her, she knew that her little brother was right. Kildare had never seen a better surfer than JJ Maybank.

June felt a sharp pain course through her stomach. It lasted only a few seconds, but it was enough to concern her. Once the wave of pain passed, June let out a deep breath and scowled to herself. She tried to return her attention back to the surfers, but her mind was wandering. An hour or so later, another wave of pain passed through her.

Trying to keep her mind off of it, June looked up and a smile crossed her face. JJ was wandering out of the water, his surfboard under his arm, his hair a mess of sea water and salt. He smiled when he saw her, trotting over.

“What are you doing here, Mamas?” He asked, standing in front of her. June leaned back, pressing her palms into the sand.

“Oh, you know, enjoying the view,” she said with a smile. JJ rolled his eyes and offered her a hand to help her up, but June waved him off. She pushed herself to her feet, taking a little longer than usual to get up.

“I’m sure you’re starved after taking that beating from the ocean,” she said once she was standing upright. “Drive me back to the Chateau and I’ll whip up some grilled cheese, yeah?”

JJ smiled.

“Sounds good to me.”

***

The next sharp pain that June felt was a lot worse than the other ones. And it stopped her right in the middle of making JJ his grilled cheese. As soon as she sucked in a sharp, pained breath, JJ was on his feet and walking over to her.

“Are you okay?” He asked, one hand on her back. June tried to push him back, but then she felt something start to trickle down her leg. Eyes wide, she turned to look at JJ. His breath caught in her throat, waiting for whatever her answer was going to be. “June?”

June swallowed a lump in her throat, pressing her hand against the side of her stomach. She looked over at JJ again, mouth going dry.

“The baby’s coming.”

#outer banks #obx #outer banks imagine #obx imagine #little village #jj maybank #jj obx #john b #john b routledge #john b obx #jj x john b's sister #john b's sister #pope heyward #sarah cameron #kie carrera #pope obx #sarah obx #kie obx

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theonlinemuse · 4 years

Photo

R E B I R T H A N D R E C O L L E C T I O N — [ co-created with @incorrectprodigalsonquotes ] A Brightwell AU

I've got sunshine on a cloudy day When it's cold outside I've got the month of May Well I guess you'd say What can make me feel this way? My girl (my girl, my girl) Talkin' 'bout my girl (my girl)

sofia wylie as young dani powell | levi miller as young malcolm bright

This AU came about when thinking of how small things cause big changes as a result of reading too many Chinese rebirth webnovels. The idea of the rebirth is for a character to live their life for a second time; a little bit like time travel except that the character is reverted back to the age they were at the time. We both liked the idea of Malcolm and Dani growing up together because they definitely would have been friends given the chance. This was also a way to be able to change some things we didn’t like the show did, including not giving Dani enough screen time. It’s very interesting to think about what could’ve changed about the whole story if Dani had grown up with Malcolm. It’s also a chance to give our favourite detective (sorry JT) some much needed backstory. This is a chance to make this not just Malcolm’s story but both Malcolm and Dani’s story.

After being fatally shot during a case, Dani is sent back in time to when she’s five years old and ends up becoming Malcolm’s childhood friend.

Dani didn't even really intend to reach out to Malcolm so early, she had been more interested in connecting with Gil in addition to making sure her father and aunt, Dinah Senior didn’t die early this time around

The first time that Dani met Malcolm after being reborn, there was a public performance for her ballet class in the park that day and it was also Dani's first solo performance

So Malcolm ends up seeing this tiny girl with her curls flying while she dances to “My Girl”

She was wondering how to approach him because he's just so young, but he's not much different than the Bright she got to know as an adult

His eyes are still the same in any lifetime

Malcolm wanted to approach Dani too because he thought her dancing was great and they ended up meeting in the middle

It’s also the day Malcolm tries ice cream truck ice cream for the first time

Dani thinks the way that Malcolm's eyes go wide at his first taste is cute

She tells him that the twist is the best flavour because you get both chocolate and vanilla

She gets hers dipped in chocolate and Malcolm ends up ordering the same thing because he's curious about it

He ends up loving it. He's never had so much sugar in his life and he loves it

Ainsley is attached to Dani from the start and she's clinging to Dani and going “no” when the nanny tries to separate them

And they end up talking for so long that the nanny tells him they have to go in order to be home in time for lunch

And Ainsley is not even close letting go

Malcolm tries to convince her to let go for all of two seconds. "Ains, come on, you have to say bye to Dani." "No!" He just looks at the nanny with a look that says, ‘well, I tried’

Dani just finds the whole thing funny and she even encourages it by hugging Ainsley tighter

Dani's mom, Zipporah is giggling in the background

And that's when Malcolm decides to ask Dani if she wants to have lunch with them. "We have a pretty good cook, plus Ainsley likes you."

Which is good because Ainsley was glaring at everyone for daring to take her away from Dani

Ainsley gasps when she hears Malcolm invite Dani and turns the puppy dog eyes on Dani and the nanny and clings to Dani even more

Zipporah finds it hilarious because Dani is maybe a foot taller than Ainsley but the toddler is clinging to Dani like a baby koala

Ainsley is practically on Dani's hip. Dani doesn't really mind, but she looks at her mom to see if she can go. Dani knows that it's gonna be a disaster, but she kind of wants to talk to Malcolm more

He’s still weird, but she likes him

When Jessica allowed the nanny to take Malcolm and Ainsley out to the park, she didn't expect them to come home with a ballerina

"Malcolm, who's your little friend? And why is Ainsley clinging to her like a limpet?"

She did think that Dani was precious and was amused at how Dani already seemed so used to Malcolm and Ainsley's antics

Jessica immediately saw that she was a very calm and mature little girl

And Malcolm knows that look in her eyes means that she wants to keep Dani with them too. "She has a mom already, you can't keep her." "Malcolm dear, there are plenty of other ways to keep her around."

Malcolm was pretty attached to Dani despite the age difference. He could tell that she's supposed to be younger than him because of her round cheeks and small hands

It's her eyes that make him think otherwise

Dani called him ‘Bright’ since they were kids because that was she was used to calling him before the rebirth happened and she called him sunshine boy and says that's when he's ‘Bright’

Dani and Malcolm's family end up catching Watkins much earlier

He still kidnaps Malcolm, but here's a twist, he didn't just threaten Jessica and Ainsley, he also threatened Dani's safety. So Dani knows that the camping trip is coming up, but she knows she can't stop it from happening without Martin getting suspicious

So she prepares. She talks to Ainsley about her "imaginary friend" and slips Malcolm a walkie talkie so they can at least stay in contact

She's ready to arm him to the teeth to help get him out of there relatively unscathed. She gets him a collapsible baton that he can easily hide on him.

She plays it off as just some things her dad always has ready for a camping trip (even though they have never been camping)

It's what he uses to knock out Watkins in the end

And she makes him promise that the next weekend, they go to see Tarzan in theatres so that she can kind of reassure herself that he'll come back and she knows that in a couple months, Malcolm will find out about his father and call the police

And then Malcolm accidentally starts talking about Dani to Martin and Watkins because he's saying things like "Me and Dani usually like to go to the movies on Saturdays. She showed me this cool trick of when you buy popcorn and candy and mix it in the popcorn bag so every bite is a surprise. Dani likes the sour lemon lime gummies and M&Ms so we usually get those."

He doesn't realize that talking about Dani is making Martin and Watkins curious about her, he's just a kid talking about his friend

And when Watkins kidnaps Malcolm, he taunts him with; "Once I'm done with your mother and sister, I'm going after your little girlfriend.” And Malcolm just flies into a blind rage, shouting things like getting Watkins arrested if he so much as looks at Dani wrong and, "If you even get close to her, I won’t think twice about calling the police!"

He didn't even want Watkins to know what Dani looked like

Unfortunately, Martin told him in very good detail what she looked like. "Oh, she's this pretty young girl that Malcolm's quite taken with." And when Watkins starts describing Dani in perfect detail, almost as if he's been watching her for some time and Malcolm has never been more terrified

In reality it was Martin, who's amused by Dani most of the time

So Watkins gets caught after the camping trip. He kidnaps Malcolm because Martin didn't go through with killing him and takes Malcolm to the little room under the Whitlys' house

Malcolm escapes similar to how he escapes in the original timeline

Only thanks to Dani preparing in advance that he doesn't need to break his hand this time

Dani gave him a lock pick set disguised as a Swiss Army knife

Malcolm managed to hide it up his sleeve before Watkins kidnapped him

Dani was relieved to hear that Watkins hadn't been able to hurt him because he managed to escape

He managed to find Ainsley and Dani in the living room and told them to find Jessica

Dani managed to call Gil right before Watkins cut the power

Watkins had an axe with him and was aiming for Dani. Cue young Malcolm flying into a rage and knocking him out. Dani and Malcolm shove Watkins in the box together

Gil shows up and is like, "Should I ask how he got in the box?" Dani and Malcolm look at each other and eventually go, "He's not as heavy as he looks"

Gil doesn't say anything because he can tell that Watkins tried to hurt them, particularly Malcolm

Both of them are a little bruised, but they both have fighting spirit

Gil reminds Jessica to get them checked out in the meantime, giving poor Zipporah another heart attack

Poor Ainsley was clinging to Dani and Malcolm the whole time. She doesn't understand why police were showing up at their house or why Dani and Malcolm got hurt

And Jessica fusses over Dani and Malcolm. She even allowed the kids to have breakfast in bed

She has the chef make all their favourites like Dani's cinnamon and brown sugar waffles with strawberries and maple syrup. Malcolm let her convince him to eat some of her strawberries. And then Ainsley wants to be fed strawberries and it leads to the siblings fighting for Dani's attention

It was one of many instances where Malcolm and Ainsley were competing for Dani's attention

Dani forgets that she's been reborn for a little while and just enjoys her friendship with Malcolm until she meets Martin

She makes sure she's never in a room alone with him

Instead she invites Malcolm and eventually Ainsley over for sleepovers

She always hugs Malcolm's arm if Martin enters the room, even if he's just picking something up

Martin can tell that Dani is more than meets the eye, but he still underestimates her

She does impress him by keeping up with Malcolm and sussing out details and she's not happy about it because she doesn't want him to like her

Malcolm is a little amused at Dani treating Martin as if he's her nemesis

He's horrified when he learns the truth and immediately tries protecting her from Martin

He thinks that she'll stop being his friend now like his other friends did

Dani is creeped out by Martin because not only is she meeting pre-arrest sweater vest Martin but he's much taller than her

It's the eyes that creep her out, especially since he reminds her of a sociopathic Mr Rogers with the sweaters, but it's Dani's steady and knowing gaze that starts to unnerve Martin

She wasn't there the night The Surgeon was arrested, but she was there early the next morning. She had her grandma drive her to his house and Dani ends up being the first thing Malcolm sees when he wakes up

She ends up waking him from a night terror much like in the pilot

Jessica was horrified and didn't notice how calm Dani was about it

She was about to pull Malcolm off, but then he wraps his arms around Dani and starts calming down after she sings to him. And Malcolm just slowly wakes up, not realizing what just happened, though he does question why they're in the hallway

He's bewildered over why he's in Dani's arms. Then he sees a scrape on her cheek and reacts in horror

That's the incident that prompt him to seek help earlier than in the original timeline and it's the first time he cries since the arrest

He does go nonverbal for a shorter period of time, but he's more eager to communicate

They both learn sign language so that they can understand each other

If Malcolm doesn't want to talk, that's fine but she's not going to lose her friend and he writes constantly so he's communicating just fine, he's just choosing not to talk at the moment

Jessica thinks this is better than Malcolm shutting everyone out

She also appreciates Dani for sticking with her son when she had no obligation too

After a month, after Dani sleeps over for the tenth time, Malcolm finally talks

It's only one word, "Dani", but it still almost makes Jessica cry

And Malcolm laughs when Dani all but tackles him with a hug

It releases the floodgates and he keeps repeating her name as he buries his face in her hair

Later, Jessica squeezes Dani tight. She keeps stroking her hair and thinking that it's a miracle that Malcolm brought Dani home that day

She makes it clear that while she hopes it will never happen but if Dani ever needed her, she would protect her the way she'd protect her own children

Jessica is even more fond of Dani in the new timeline. She thinks she's adorable and that her friendship with Malcolm is precious. She's always gushing about Dani's maturity and intelligence

Malcolm isn't jealous. It's the first time he and his mother really agree on something

Malcolm and Dani had matching Halloween costumes when they were growing up together

Throughout Dani's childhood, she had dreams where she and Malcolm have odd conversations while dressed as characters from children's books

One dream had her dressed as Alice and trying to get a straight answer out of Mad Hatter!Malcolm. MH!Malcolm tells her that the answer she’s looking for will appear after she finishes her Earl Grey and when she drains her cup, she finds two words painted at the bottom

She can’t remember when the words were, but it shocks her to the point where she doesn’t even realize that Malcolm has practically flipped the overly long table that was between them and he slowly and deliberately walks up to her. She wakes up just as he’s grasped her chin in his hand and tips her face up to look at him

Gil and Jessica have a long standing bet on when Dani and Malcolm will finally get together

Malcolm talked to Dani when he came home to visit from college and told her that he was thinking of applying to Quantico because by the time he told Martin, he had already applied. And he asks what she thinks of it

He shares his fears about being told that he's his father's son and she tells him that Malcolm Whitly is his own person

She gives the idea of changing his last name and he chooses Bright because she calls him that all the time. She said that he was old enough to change his name without anyone's approval

He didn't call himself Bright for her approval but he did it because Dani's the only person he has in his life where he doesn't have to pretend that he's someone he's not

Jessica is a little miffed at the name change at first. She suggested that he take her maiden name, but then Malcolm talks to her about his discussion with Dani and she now thinks it's sweet

Malcolm is the first to realize his feelings for Dani. She comes by to congratulate him and they talk until late at night. Dani ends up falling asleep on his shoulder and Malcolm stares at her as if she'll disappear if he looks away for a second. Dani has him promise not to drop off the face of the earth before she ends up falling asleep and he kisses the top of her head

During his first year in college, he comes back for Christmas with his Walking Dead look.

Dani and Jessica are a little horrified, but Malcolm just wants his hug and he playfully chases Dani

They're both laughing and they nearly fall over when Malcolm has her in a bear hug

Dani's dad, Christophe died when she was sixteen in the original timeline, but he lives in the new one

Christophe and Dani's sister Naomie were riding home from her swimming lessons one afternoon when a truck ran a red light and hit them in the side. Naomie survived, but she was traumatized to the point when she had night terrors for months afterwards

Dani and her oldest sister Mona took turns sleeping with her to take care of her whenever she had one

This time, Dani was with them and helped them avoid the accident in the nick of time, but she didn't come out of it unscathed

Dani got a bad concussion and was unconscious for two days. That was the first time she caught glimpses of the original timeline

Malcolm came running after Jessica called him in hysterics, especially since he had literally been away for a few weeks because his second semester of college had started

He was a mess when he arrived and he practically collapsed in Christophe's arms

He was half-demanding to see Dani and Christophe let it slide because he knew that the demands were coming from grief and worry

Christophe still had to tell Malcolm to calm down and rubbed his back until Malcolm was somewhat calm before he went in and all the while he was sobbing that he can't lose Dani and it was heartbreaking for Christophe to see

That's when he knew (though he always suspected) that Malcolm loved Dani

Jessica, Christophe, and Gil had to force him to eat and for him to go home for an hour to get cleaned up. Jessica makes a comment about Dani would be complaining about his stench and that earns a watery chuckle

He keeps talking to Dani hoping that she's listening. He gets hopeful when he's talking and he feels her squeeze his hand the tiniest bit. "Are you just trying to get me to shut up?"

And even while unconscious, Dani still has a sense of humour because she squeezes his hand again

Malcolm falls asleep in the chair next to her and Christophe is on guard because he knows Malcolm has night terrors too

He's still surprised when Malcolm actually sleeps through the night

He chalks it up to it being the effect that Dani has on him

Dani wakes up eventually and is surprised to see him

Her voice is still croaky from disuse, but she manages to rasp out "Malcolm"

Malcolm almost lunge-hugs her and he presses his forehead against hers and cries tears of relief. "Sorry," He wipes away a tear that fell on her cheek. "You're awake for one second and I get salt water all over you."

She just smiles at him. She looks tired and worn and she's covered in bandages, but he can still feel her breathing under his fingertips

And he always liked her eyes, but he's never been so grateful to see them open. He swears there's no more beautiful sight than in that moment

At one point, Dani falls into a coma and she sees glimpses of the original timeline where she died. She bleeds out in his arms while he's yelling for an ambulance and begging her to stay awake

In the aftermath of everything, Malcolm takes to talking to Dani whenever he's particularly stressed or sad. He talks about her family and Gil and Jessica getting together and how much everyone misses her. And how he wishes he had been selfish about his feelings for her and admitted it when she was still alive

“I’m still mad at you,” he says one day, “for dying. You didn’t have to, you know. If you weren't always looking out for my selfish ass--maybe you'd still be here. You weren't supposed to leave us. You weren't supposed to leave me… I would’ve switched places with you in a heartbeat..."

In the new timeline, Malcolm does think that Dani has some sort of secret with how she came into his life

He looks at her for a second and thinks that her eyes are still the same as they were twenty years ago and he thinks that with all the coincidences and how knowing Dani has been in the last twenty years and realizes there's something going on. But it's not dark like Dr. Whitly's secrets. It's warm, bright, and gives him hope. He's okay with not knowing

Because Dani is not Martin and her eyes are still the same as ever. It's those eyes that make him think that instead of growing up, Dani just grew into who she was all along

#Prodigal Son #Rebirth and Recollection #Dani Powell #Malcolm Bright #Brightwell #ship it #not exactly my best work #my graphics

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101flavoursofweird · 4 years

Note

Secret injuries would be interesting for some good Flora angst

((Thank you for the suggestion and I’m sorry this is late! I already used the ‘Secret Injuries’ prompt for Rook and Bishop whump... so I decided to add this to my new series about Flora— Put Yourself Back In The Narrative. It still contains Flora whump and angst... Flora secretly misses the professor and Luke, but Kat helps her realise that she’s not alone in that regard! This also contains some criticism of Layton’s decisions during the Relics investigation from Flora’s perspective. I hope that’s ok!

Spoilers for the anime and most of the series below! It starts with Flora writing a couple of letters...))

Em,

It's a relief to hear that the agency aren't involved... I still can't believe the professor never mentioned them! After everything you and Uncle have told me, I hope we never cross paths with those vultures. Don't worry— I memorised Grosky's phone number and I made sure Fen and Kitty did too.

Though, at the same time, it's disappointing that we've you've exhausted another lead.

Where will you be investigating next? Is there anyone else who might hold a grudge against the professor? All of the people I can think of are in prison... well, except for one, but he wrote to me insisting he isn't the perpetrator. I'd be more inclined to believe him if he spoke to me in person!

Maybe you could come home and help us track him down? Kitty said she misses her favourite aunt!

And we could make up some better codenames while you're here.

You stay safe too!

Flora

To Our Wise Guardian,

Thank you for searching for our reclusive father and looking after our restless uncle.

I trust Miss Altava with my life. If she believes the agency aren’t to blame, then I believe her. I don't care what she did in the past anymore then I care about Uncle's past. She wants to find the professor just as much as he does.

Please remind Uncle of that, and don't let him burn down any trees. Climate change is a real thing.

If you aren't having any joy with the Azran sites, maybe you should take a break. (It sounds like Uncle needs it!) There’s a park just across the road from us where you could land the Bos airship.

Fen would love to talk to Uncle about this device he's been working on. And Kitty has been begging for some new books...

Until next time,

The Layton Clan

Dear Brenda & Clark,

We're doing alright here, though we'd be lost without Rosa!

Alfendi has been given some extra time to complete his end-of-year project. At Kat's last parents’ evening, her teachers said she can be quiet in class but other than that, they're pleased with her progress.

Yes, Grandma Lucille is home now— we went to visit her and Grandpa Roland the other day. I just received Kuri is still with her family in Japan.

I feel awful for Marina's family... Please tell them that they're welcome here in England as well. I'm sure that wherever they are, Luke will protect Marina with his life.

...Arianna mentioned Tony's wedding. We'll all have to go dress shopping together. Kat's already decided she wants a yellow dress. (You might have some competition, Brenda!) Can Clark help Al choose a suit? He's a nightmare to shop for!

We can't wait to see you both. If you need help with the move, just give us a call.

Love,

Flora, Al & Kat xoxo

Dear Arianna,

Don't worry about the late reply! You should see my desk— there are SO many letters I haven't even opened yet! I wish I really wish Luke was here. He’s so much more organised than I am...

I miss him too—

The ink was smudged from Flora’s tears. She tried to hide it by scribbling out the last line, but there was no saving the letter now. Sniffing, she crumpled the paper into a tight ball and threw it at her bedroom wall. She didn’t bother aiming for the overflowing plastic bin.

What a waste. If Alfendi or Kat had done that, she would have tutted at them. They couldn’t afford to be wasteful, even with the emergency savings their father had left them…

Flora squeezed her black fountain pen (a twenty-first birthday gift from the professor), wishing she could snap it in half.

He had planned for this. He knew he’d be gone for so long and there was a chance he would never return.

Flora hadn’t come to say goodbye to he and Luke the day they set off, but Rosa had.

“What’s the point in searching for the girl’s father, after all these years? Why take the risk? Don’t you love Kat, Professor!?”

Yes, of course he did, but he wanted to solve the mystery behind her family. Solving a puzzle about a bunch of rocks was more important than raising his daughter, apparently. He had adopted Kat and now he was leaving her behind.

Flora huffed out a tearful laugh. She, more than anyone, should have seen it coming. But she had believed (assumed) it would be different with Kat.

The professor had taken Kat in when she was a tiny baby. A baby couldn’t be left home alone or sent to school. Parenting was a full-time job (as Flora was well aware these days).

Luke had laughed when the professor first announced that he would be Kat’s father.

Everyone, Flora included, had expected the majority of responsibility would fall on Rosa. Or, in Rosa’s absence, another eager friend or family member. (Grandma and Grandpa Layton, Uncle Desmond, the Monte d’Or gang…) The babysitting offers came flooding in much faster than when Alfendi was little. A newborn baby was far more appealing than a grief-stricken child.

Flora would have helped look after her siblings even more, had she not been so busy preparing for university.

But, in the professor’s defence, he had refused to take on any new cases and he had reduced his work hours. When he couldn’t escape his office at Gressenheller, he would bring Kat with him.

He had chosen the name ‘Katrielle’. It was an unusual name, but it went well with ‘Alfendi’.

You would think eight-year-old Alfendi would be jealous of all the attention his new sister was receiving. It was quite the opposite. By spending more time with Kat, the professor spent more time with Alfendi; trips to the park, the library, the museum…

Flora would join them whenever she got the chance. Kat was the glue that brought them all together.

The professor had ‘officially’ adopted Katrielle Layton when she turned three. It seemed he had given up on finding her biological father…

And then Luke (Darn him!) had to stick his nose back in to the Relic Stones business.

He had married Marina in secret just so they could move to England without the professor’s knowledge. Consequently, Flora had been kept in the dark too.

That hurt. After all these years, Luke still didn’t trust her.

She could have assisted him with the investigation. She wouldn’t have told the professor…

Luke had shut her out, along with Marina. (Poor Marina…)

Thankfully, Marina had sought out the professor as soon as Luke went missing.

The idiot had gotten himself caught by Don Paolo. (Yes, a similar fate had befallen Flora once… when she was fifteen. Luke was twenty-five, trained in karate and he should have known better!)

After Luke’s rescue, he was dragged back to the Layton household for a family reunion. Flora had given Luke an earful— “YOU DIDN’T INVITE US TO YOUR WEDDING AND THEN YOU ABANDONED YOUR NEW WIFE?!!”—before she hugged him. She had thought that would be the end of the whole Relics fiasco.

She’d thought wrong.

The professor had gotten involved after that. Family outings were pushed aside in favour of the Relics Stones.

At Alfendi’s eighteenth birthday meal, the professor and Luke were trading research notes under the table.

Flora found a house with her girlfriend, Kuri. The professor never once visited them, despite Flora’s many invitations.

The day Luke left for his journey with the professor, Marina had called Flora, crying because she and Luke had fallen out. Flora had gone to comfort her. (That was the last time Flora had any contact with Marina.)

Flora didn’t blame Luke as much as the professor. Luke was a young man fresh out of university— reckless, full of heart and loyal to a fault. He had watched Kat’s birth mother die and now he wanted to scour the world for answers. But, as Arianna had said, the world was so vast…

When Kat was born, Luke had been a student— too young to look after a baby by himself. So, the professor had accepted the role of being Kat’s parent.

The professor couldn’t just adopt a child (three children) and run off ten years later.

Kat wasn’t a puzzle that needed to be solved. She was a little girl.

A girl who never stopped eating sweets, but enjoyed going to the dentist if they would give her a sticker.

A girl who still hoped Santa and the Easter Bunny were real, even if the Tooth Fairy was fiction.

A girl who practiced her dad’s ‘detective’ poses in the mirror.

A girl who didn’t like tea, but still insisted on drinking it.

A girl who could hold a heated debate with her older brother (eight years her senior).

A girl whose family couldn’t afford a dog, so she stopped to pet every stray she met on the street.

A girl who thought people would only befriend her because of her last name. A girl who feared those friends would leave her when they learned of her father’s absence.

A girl who dreamed about her dad every night and woke up in tears.

A girl who was always trying to make her big sister smile…

“Hey, Floor…?” Kat knocked on Flora’s bedroom door, but she didn’t wait for Flora to answer. She burst in to see Flora wiping her eyes. Kat wondered, “What’s for dinner?”

“I, erm… I thought we could have lamb stew,” Flora suggested, standing up from her desk chair.

“Lamb stew? That’s Uncle Luke’s favourite!”

It was actually roast lamb… Flora could feel her eyes burning again. She turned away from Kat and tidied her desk. “I’ll be down in a minute,” she said distractedly.

“I can help you clean up!”

“Don’t worry, Kat—“

“Have you been writing more letters…?”

Flora glanced at Kat. Kat was picking up the ball of paper that had missed the bin— Arianna’s letter. Flora gasped, “Don’t...!”

Kat, ever curious, smoothed out the letter and read it to herself. She frowned when she reached the end.

Flora sighed. “No one was meant to read that…”

Kat carefully placed the letter on Flora’s desk. “I miss him,” Kat mumbled. “And Dad…”

“I know…” Flora touched Kat’s head. “I do, too.” Her words were mainly intended to reassure Kat, but Flora meant it.

She missed them— both of them— so much. No matter how much they had pushed her away, she missed them and she wanted them back.

“That’s okay,” Kat whispered, reaching up to grab Flora’s hand. She tugged Flora out of her bedroom and downstairs to where Alfendi was impatiently setting the table for dinner.

Later, Flora would rewrite her letter to Arianna, signing off with:

…I miss him too. It’s okay if you ever want talk about it. I’ll be here.

Sincerely,

Flora

#professor layton #flora reinhold #Katrielle Layton #hershel layton #luke triton #marina triton #Flora is here to FIGHT FOR MARINA #Rosa grimes #layton mystery journey #LMJ #my writing #angst #my fics #Arianna Barde #answers

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lia-jones · 4 years

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Growing Stronger - Chapter Thirty-Five - The Gift that Keeps on Giving

The sun was setting when we finally left the florist, where we had met with the wedding planner. Miraculously, I managed to not laugh at the mention of peonies, and the afternoon turned out to be quite productive. The flower arrangements we had picked were beautiful, and Victor was in a good mood. The day was going extremely well.

“I can’t believe we just ordered 500 flower arrangements. That’s crazy.” I commented. It was beginning to dawn on me just how big of a wedding I was having.

“Four hundred people.” Victor explained. “Forty-two tables, plus the arrangements on the floor and ceiling. That is for the reception venue alone. Then the wedding venue, decorating the gazebo, the chairs, the bar, the road that leads to the farm, the gates and the wall…”

“Yeah. Four hundred guests. And the media. And God knows who else.” I pouted. All of that still bothered me to some extent, but the recent fight with Victor had really put things in perspective. And the truth was, it didn’t matter how I got married, wearing jeans or a designer dress, in front of an Elvis impersonator or the cream of the crop in Loveland. What mattered was who I was getting married to.

“You were the one that wanted my father to be involved.” Victor complained. “And make no mistake, I know your intentions were good. However, that’s how he does things, it’s all for the public eye. Everything must be grand, whatever he considers a public scandal must be hidden. Even my aunt Terry has to hide her relationship with Susan.”

I was flabbergasted.

“Terry has to hide her what with who!?”

“You never noticed?” Victor frowned at me. “You are usually so in tune with these things.”

“No! Why didn’t you tell me?” My mind was reeling with all the implications of this new information. “We didn’t invite Susan to the wedding! God, how rude was that?”

“I honestly thought you noticed it, Susan is always there.” Victor retorted. “Besides, it’s not really my business to talk about other people’s private lives.”

“I thought she was her assistant! She has some serious Goldman vibes.” I shrugged.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Victor glared at me.

“Oh please, Goldman is your work wife and you know it.” I teased. “You spend more time with him than with me.”

“I’m going to pretend you didn’t just say that.” He scolded, and I laughed. “Do we really need to go home for that flash drive?” He changed the subject. “Couldn’t it wait? We are already running late as it is.”

“It’ll be quick, I promise.” I gave him a reassuring look. “Olive will keep nagging me if I don’t give it to her as soon as possible.”

The apartment was dark when we arrived, and Victor had to fumble for the light switch in the hallway.

“I must tell the housekeeper not to pull all the blinds down.” He commented as he checked if the pet lobster had food. “Where is the flash drive?”

“I think I left it in the living room.” I walked towards the darkness again, but Victor stopped me.

“I don’t like you walking in the dark alone. You may stumble on something and hurt yourself.” He warned. “I’ll go with you.”

Victor held my hand protectively as we walked into the living room. On a normal day, I would have laughed it off, called him an idiot for once, saying that I was perfectly capable of going by myself. Except this time his protective ways were working to my advantage, so I obediently followed him, waiting for him to find the light switch and turn it on. The coming of light was accompanied by a loud roar that echoed through the entire penthouse.

“SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!”

Greatly startled, Victor jumped, quickly and quite forcefully pulling me behind his back, holding my arms tight, his senses high and alert to an impending attack. His heart was beating so hard I could feel it on his back, as he pulled me closer behind him. I placed my hand gently on his shoulder, letting him know everything was alright.

“Surprise, handsome.” I said in a soft tone, and his grip on me slackened, allowing me to move to his front.

I looked at him carefully. Victor was pale, his grey eyes dark, as his pupils enlarged, like a cat ready to jump. It was obvious we gave him the scare of a lifetime.

“Victor, man, don’t pass out, ok?” My brother Joshua came to him, shaking his hand.

Still dumbfounded, Victor was able to return the shake and offer a weak smile, gulping, blinking, trying to recover from the fright. He quickly scanned the room, probably trying to figure out who was there. In our large living room stood my parents, Joshua, Cristina and Ana, Goldman and Diana. I had invited several members of his family, his father included, but only Terry and Mina had shown up.

“What are you all doing here?” He managed to say.

“Celebrating your birth, Hummingbird.” Mina came to him, hugging him. “Happy Birthday.”

“Thank you.” He was able to get himself together, starting to greet everyone. But I could see he was still a bit unsettled with the surprise, emotional even, speaking very little, his arm never leaving my waist.

“Ok, birthday boy.” My mother took Victor by the arm, leading him to the dining area. “We prepared a feast for you. All your favorite dishes, including the Portuguese ones.”

“When did you arrive?” Victor asked, probably still not believing what he was seeing. “You came all this way for my birthday?

“Yes, of course.” My father chimed in. “Besides, I wouldn’t miss a chance to see your cellar.”

“Absolutely.” Victor raised his glass to my father. “I hope Andrea arranged for you all to stay here with us, and not in some hotel.”

“You don’t need to worry about us.” My mother retorted. “We are far too many, there’s the baby, we don’t want to disturb your peace.”

“Nonsense. I insist.” Victor replied as he held Ana, who was playfully pulling his tie, giving him a wide smile. “And my jet will take you back to Portugal anytime you want to. Ana shouldn’t be taking commercial flights, it must be exhausting for her.”

We all sat down to begin our feast, talking and drinking. Eventually, Victor relaxed, a happy smile creeping in, enjoying the presence of everyone. Maybe it was a good thing his family hadn’t shown up, apart from the two people I knew were very important to him. It was clear to me, as I had observed at the engagement party, that affection didn’t run very deep in his family. More than that, there was a strange friction between all the members, and that seemed to affect Victor more than the others. He had been uncomfortable all night, seeking solace in me whenever he could, pretending to belong to a tight family for the sake of appearances, his father only showing up to parade one of us off.

With my family, however, Victor behaved like himself, the Victor I knew and had learned to love. He was extroverted, witty, sweet, and it was blatant that here he felt welcomed and loved. This was the side of him I wanted to see, always. That dreadful night in his father’s mansion, I promised myself I wouldn’t force Victor to forge any kind of relationship with that self-absorbed man, as it brought him more pain than comfort.

After singing Happy Birthday to a very bashful Victor, we ate the amazing chocolate cake Mina insisted on baking and drank some champagne. Joshua rose from his seat to make a toast.

“I’d like to make a toast to Victor, our baby business mogul here.” Victor shook his head chuckling. “May we celebrate many of your birthdays, and may you always take the check.”

Everybody laughed, including Victor. Josh continued.

“Now, if you don’t mind, as your best man and future brother-in-law, I would like to present you your gift.” Josh continued, very formal. “It’s not something you want but it’s definitely something you need. Tonight, my brother, you say goodbye to your life as a singleton. We are having a bachelor party!”

All the men cheered, except for Victor, that shook his head in disapproval.

“Josh, we said no bachelor or bachelorette parties!” I intervened. “It’s not something we enjoy doing.”

“I’m sorry, Andy, you are my sister and I love you, but Diane and I both agree, you two are behaving like an old couple!” Josh argued. “You are staying here with the girls and having some fun. Me and the guys are taking Victor out for drinks and pool and I promise you I will bring him ready for bed.”

“Oh no, Josh, you are not bringing him home drunk.” I already knew my brother, and what he was capable of. I was sure Josh would get Victor completely sloshed. It was like his superpower.

“I’m not coming home drunk.” Victor practically rolled his eyes at him. “When have you ever seen me drunk?”

“Oh no, you don’t know my brother!” I warned him. “He is very compelling when he wants to be! I swear to God, Victor, if you come home stumbling…”

“He won’t be stumbling, I will carry him like the sweet prince he is.” Joshua joked, getting up from his seat. “Come on, guys, let’s get this bachelor party started!”

“I just need a moment, I’ll meet you outside.” Victor got up from his seat and took my hand, taking me to our room. When we got there, he spun in my direction, his hands lovingly resting on my shoulders.

“I mean it, Victor, be careful with my brother. He’s vicious.” I warned again, worried to see Victor so confident. In my eyes, he was a sitting duck. “You should see what he did to Cristina’s dad at his bachelor party.”

“Who do you think you are talking to?” He chuckled. “He’s not going to get me drunk. I promise.” He smiled at me, and I relaxed to see him happy. “Now come here.”

His arm snaked around the small of my back, his other hand holding the back of my head, fingers entwined in my curls. He kissed me softly, gently, lovingly. Loving me. I loved him back.

“Thank you.” He gave me a knowing look.

“I was afraid you were going to hate it.” I confessed.

“It was very thoughtful. I enjoyed it very much.” He pecked me one last time on the lips before turning to leave. “I will return in three hours, and I will show you how much I’ve enjoyed it.” He pointed a playful finger at me. “Sober.”

I returned to the living room, a pitcher of margaritas already waiting for me.

“Here comes the sexy bride!” Diane screamed the moment she saw me. I couldn’t help but chuckle at her enthusiasm.

“Let’s get you served…” My mom filled me a glass. “Diane won’t drink, will you?” She turned to Diane with a knowing smile.

“Diane won’t drink?” I snorted. “Yeah, right.”

Diane smiled, her face bright red.

“Actually, I can’t drink… Not for a little while.” She confessed.

“I knew it.” My mother snapped her fingers in satisfaction. “My radar is never wrong.”

I blinked. The room was suddenly very quiet, everybody staring at me.

“You’re pregnant?” I asked quietly. She nodded.

I know, I’m petty. I know I should be happy for my friend. And the truth was, a part of me was exhilarated for her. There was nothing I wanted more in this world than to hold her child, and spoil her like a good aunt should. I never had this feeling when Cristina announced her pregnancy, or when Ana was born, but then again, I wasn’t starting a life with anyone either.

But my heart sank low, so low I thought I wouldn’t be able to pick it up. Victor surely knew about this and didn’t tell me anything to spare me from the hurt. He probably considered asking Goldman not to tell me until we were married, but figured that was something he couldn’t possibly ask. I wondered if he also felt his heart sink, knowing he wouldn’t have the same joy. I wouldn’t come home with a positive pregnancy test, he wouldn’t post on Moments that we were going to be three. We wouldn’t have doctors appointments and ultrasounds, and weird food cravings, and large hands on a very swollen stomach, or kicks. No gender reveals, no people cooing over a newborn, stating she looked like Victor or me, although we both would know at that point she looked like nobody. I was robbing him of those moments, with a lousy legacy my ex had left me. My heart sank lower.

My introspection lasted barely a second. I put on the happiest face I could muster. Diane deserved it.

“Oh my God, Diane!” I shouted, wrapping my arms around her, pretending the tears I was letting out were happy ones. “Congratulations! I’m so happy for you!” That wasn’t a lie.

Diane immediately started crying.

“Oh Andy, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before, I wasn’t sure if I was going to hurt you, I’m sorry. I’m so happy to see you are happy!” She hugged me again.

“Are you kidding?” I smiled as widely as I could. “It’s wonderful news!”

I beelined into the kitchen, with the excuse of coming back with another jar of margaritas. Well, it was half an excuse. I felt like I needed all the alcohol I could get. Victor would come home completely sloshed, I could do the same. But of course. Dr. Mariana wouldn’t let me. She had to psychomom me.

“Everything alright?” She asked softly from the door.

“Mom, I beg you, not today!” I threw my head back in frustration, as I got some ice from the freezer. “I can be happy for other people, you know! Just because I can’t have kids-”

“That is not what I was asking.” She interrupted me. “How are things between you and Victor?”

Ugh . She noticed something. I did not feel like spilling the beans though. Nothing I could say would make me look good in that particular picture.

“Things have been stressful, as I’m sure it happens to all couples before a wedding. Lots to do, not enough time.” I threw all the excuses I could think of as I threw ingredients into the blender. “Nothing unusual.”

“I see.” She came closer, as if she was ready to play her card. “Is that why you look like you're on the verge of collapsing? I can tell, you know. You’re my daughter.”

And just like that, she had me cornered, showing me that no matter what I said, she would read into it. Fine.

“Please don’t make a big deal out of this, ok?” I looked her in the eyes. “We did have a fight. It wasn’t pretty.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. Are things better now?”

“Yes, we are getting there.” I sighed. “Not what I would want before the wedding, but at least I got to understand what’s bothering him. I think he’s afraid I may leave him.”

“It’s pretty clear to me that Victor, despite his detached, independent stance, can be very insecure sometimes.” My mother offered. “Judging by the absence of his father at his own son’s birthday festivities, I think it’s safe to say that he might have abandonment issues.”

“Victor doesn’t really have a relationship with him. It’s messy.” I shook my head, remembering the time Gregory stormed into Victor’s hospital room, more worried about not getting a call than his own son.

“And still you invited him?” My mother frowned. “Andrea, we do not fabricate a relationship like that. If Victor can’t have a healthy relationship with his father, you have to accept it. It’s his thing, he has his reasons.”

“I know.” I hung my head. “It’s useless anyway, he couldn’t find the time to come to his son's birthday. I bet he didn’t even call.”

“Something tells me from his reaction, Victor’s not used to being the center of attention. At least not in a loving way.” Right to the point, as my mom always was. “Maybe it won’t be easy to get him to fully trust you; he’s probably been let down so many times. But do try and show him, to the best of your ability, that he matters to you. That’s what will make your marriage work. You already have a good dynamic, all you need is to make sure he doesn’t shut down.”

“Right.” I frowned. “How exactly do I do that?”

“The way you’ve been doing it until now. You love him, you show him you are there.” She took my hand lovingly. “That’s all he needs.”

“Right.” I nodded, the pep talk making me feel more grounded. “I will, thank you.”

We resumed our drinking in the living room, bantering about married life and other subjects. Diane had prepared some games to play, but we didn’t care. All girls, including Mina, who wasn’t drinking but was chiming in with wise words now and again, were basking on that moment of female bonding, sharing experiences, and laughter, and love. Who needed strippers? We had friendship.

After a few hours, the doorbell rang. It was Goldman asking for paper towels.

“He threw up all over the upholstery.” He complained. “I’m going to help take him out of the car, I’ll be right back. Get ready to leave, Di.”

My heart froze. I knew it.

“That bad?” I grimaced. I was going to kill Josh. All I needed was a good place to bury the body.

“Completely wasted.” Goldman shook his head. “Let me help them.”

I went to the bedroom, to prepare the bed. I grabbed a pair of his pajamas and clean underwear. I would probably have to give him a shower and put him in bed. How I would do that to a very drunk and very tall Victor, I had no idea.

I returned to the door and opened it, expectant. Starting to get furious. The ding announced the elevator door opening.

And I couldn’t believe my eyes. Victor stepped out, fresh as a daisy, a smug smile on his face, carrying a nearly passed out Josh, with the help of my dad.

“I’m so proud to have you in the family, man.” My brother slurred to Victor, who chuckled. “You are a top-notch guy. I love you, man. I love you so fucking much.”

“You already said that, son. Victor knows.” My father answered with a sigh. “Let’s get you in bed, preferably without waking up your daughter.”

Victor left Josh with Cristina and my dad, taking off his vomit drenched suit jacket with a frown.

“Oh no, there were casualties…” I joked, amused to see Victor immune to my brother’s charms. “You got him drunk instead.” I smiled widely. “Genius.”

“Ye of little faith.” He grabbed me by the waist, kissing me softly on the lips. “What did I tell you?”

“Indeed.” I stroke his cheek softly, going down to his chest. “I see you are worthy of your present.”

“If it involves nudity, I will need a shower first. My jacket wasn’t the only casualty.” Victor frowned again.

“Wait, before you do that, Let me show you your other present.” I beamed at him. “This one does not involve nudity.”

Sitting in our bed, Victor carefully unwrapped his gift.

“It feels like a book.” He said, opening the paper to reveal his gift. It was a customized planner, with a leather cover, words engraved in gold spelling Victor . “A planner?”

“Open it.” I urged. As he skimmed through the pages, he could see several pictures of us, transparent in the background of the pages. “I made one for myself too, want to see?” I got up and took mine out of one of the dressing drawers. “Here. So you know that even if sometimes I may be busy, I will always be thinking of you. And you’ll be thinking of me too.”

“What’s the flash drive stuck in the cover for?” He picked it up, examining it closely.

“I know you like to use your planner on your computer and your phone, so I had it made in digital format too.” I smiled at him, aching for a reaction. “Do you like it?”

“So we did have a flash drive to pick up after all.” He wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer. “Thank you, I love it. You were very thoughtful.” He pecked me on the lips. “Now let me get a shower so we can go to the… second? no, third part of my present.” He smiled.

“Hmmm, how about if I join you and we make it a four-part birthday present?” I started unbuttoning his shirt, and he promptly started pecking my neck.

“Miss Jones…” His voice rumbled in my ear. “I do like the way you think.”

#growingstronger #Growing Pains - Series #mister love queens choice #love and producer #victor x oc #mlqc victor #mlqc li zeyan #mlqc fanfic

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dclaurice · 3 years

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The One Where She Tells The Truth

I was raised in a religious household. Strict Pentecostal. No makeup, no cutting your hair, no wear shirts that didn’t cover your arms, or pants. You had to dress modest, meaning skirts that hit the knee and were shapeless. We went to church every Wednesday, Friday and Sunday, but that isn’t where this story begins.

This truth begins in high school. I grew up with three girls A, S, and D, who also happened to go to the same church. They were everything I wished I was, but also never wanted to be. A was outrageous. She was always in trouble for something and couldn’t keep her mouth shut. I admired her courage to be herself no matter what. S was repressed. Her mom was extremely strict, and barely let her out of her sight, and was always on her about her appearance. Finally, there was D. She was the worst of all. She had a bad attitude and thought she was the shit. She had it worse than anyone. Her Aunt was extremely strict and since this all took place before it was frowned up to “spank” your children. D would get regularly beaten anytime she did something remotely wrong.

These girls were supposedly my best friends. Now before I continue with this story, it’s important for me to tell you that I am adopted. My mother gave me up on two separate occasions. The first time was deliberate and included my brother and sister. The second time, it was more like she had forgotten my existence and just never came back. I tell you this so that you can understand that when I met these girls, I just wanted friends. I wanted someone to like me. I wanted to feel like I belonged and that someone cared, because for the better part of the beginning of my life, in my head, I was worthless and something was wrong me. Otherwise, why would my mother not want me.

Flash forward to high school and we start to notice boys. I say we in a loose sense of the word. At this point in my life, I had had so many bad interactions with foster brothers, I didn’t actually care to deal with boys, but you do what you have to in order to fit in. Each of these girls was boy crazy in their own way, but S really took home the cake. She and I were closer than the other girls. I would spend weekends at her house. Help her with her paper route in the mornings, we would talk about clothes and talk about futures and being able to go shopping anytime we want. She met a boy freshman year and started bringing him to church. Her parents would pick him up and they would all arrive together. It started out really innocent, a few sneaky kisses here and there. Normal teenage stuff. A few months after she met him, she asked if I would sit in the middle of the van, so that they could share the backseat. I didn’t think anything of it, until I looked back and she had covered her lap with his jacket and his right hand was nowhere to be seen.

It didn’t last much longer after that, he got bored with not getting anymore action and he stopped coming around. After that, things seemingly went back to normal. I had just gotten my drivers license, and had been working my first job at Burger king for awhile, so I started picking her up on Saturday’s and going to the mall. One day while shopping, she tells me she needs to run to the bathroom and she will be right back. Twenty minutes passes by and she finally comes back and tells me she met someone coming out of the bathroom and she got held up talking to him. Again no big deal, we continue our day and once done shopping, calls her mom to ask if she can spend the night at my house and come with me to church Sunday morning.

That night around 10:30, she leaves my bedroom and I hear the slider open and someone comes in. I go out to see what is going on and she introduces the person she met at the mall. She’s invited him to my house, without telling me and asks me to stay in my room, while they hang out. This continues on for months, sometimes he comes to my house, sometimes she sneaks out to see him and comes back late in the morning and other times, she just completely ditches me at the mall and I spend hours shopping by myself until she has the courtesy to come back.

It’s not until she ends up pregnant that she realizes she’s in trouble. Not only because, the baby’s dad basically abandoned her, but also because her Mom is going to be pissed. She makes up a story and tries to pass of the pregnancy as not her fault. I won’t repeat what that story is, because I am sure you can all guess. Anyway, life goes on. She has the baby and we attempt to get back to normal life. As normal as life can be when one of you is a teenage mother. We start going back to the mall and about 6 months after the baby is born, the pattern starts again. Another man she has met at the mall, has been invited to my house. Only this time when she ditches me, I am left watching her baby, or taking care of him in my room while she fucks him in the other.

I give you all of this background to tell you two things. During this time all of their mothers/guardians think I am the bad influence. They think that I am the one flirting with boys, they think that I am the trouble maker and basically use me as a scapegoat to believe that their daughters are just the ones getting caught and I am just so good at being sneaky to get caught. And I let them believe it, because it’s better than the alternative. It’s better than sticking up for myself and having these girls hate me, because during that time they loved me. I kept everyone of their dirty little secrets. I never shared a damn thing. When they would talk about sex and the different positions, I would pretend I knew what I was talking about and share my favorite position, even though I had never actually had sex and wouldn’t have sex for the first time until I went away for college.

To this day their parents still believe that I was the bad influence. Even though S has three children with three different men, A has 5 children with different men and D is working on child 6 or 7, I’ve lost count with as many different men. Yet here I am with no kids and living my best life. This is not to say that you can’t do that with kids, because you definitely can. This is just to say that I am the one that was influenced by them. I was the one pressured to be more forward with guys, I was the one pressured to fit in and in this group pressured to fit in meant doing things you may not have always wanted to do.

I write this mostly to finally get it off my chest. To rid myself of the weight of this. This post is therapeutic in a way because for so long I have hated that part of my life. Absolutely loathed the pathetic way I wanted to fit in, but recently have been reminded that I have come a long way. I have done some good things with my life and will continue to do good things. I just have to love myself for who I am now and appreciate what brought me here.

#therapy #thetruthwillsetyoufree #iloveme #blogtherapy

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merrickkingston · 4 years

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Our Forever Starts Now

Merrick: After a few delays, our wedding day was finally here. Kiara was going to marry me and become my “first lady”. Our wedding ceremony would be an intimate family affair. Her aunt Celina was our officiant, and her sister Amelia was escorting her down the aisle. We couldn’t wait to see Miranda toddle down the aisle in her flower girl finery. Baby Jaden was too young to participate, but he’d be there in his Dad’s arms. I had a feeling that Miranda would veer off the aisle and run to him too which would be just fine with us.

I had talked to Kiki about asking Chase to stand up with me until I found out that my childhood friend Damen had returned to the area. He was a couple years older than I was, but we couldn’t have been closer. I still remember when he left to go to college and then medical school on a full scholarship. I was as proud of him as his family was. It had been many years since we’d seen each other, but as soon as we reconnected and I introduced him to my fiancée, I couldn’t see anyone else standing up with me on the most important day of my life so far.

———————-

Kiki: I didn’t think this day would ever come. Staying the night away from Merrick sucked. But I had to admit, having a girls’ night was just what I needed. It was amazing spending the night with Kenzi, Kenzi’s sister Cat, Amelia and the little ones, and my Aunt Celina. We sat around talking, playing with the kids, and just enjoying each other’s company. I know a lot of brides have this whole idea of how their last night as a single woman should go, but honestly? I couldn’t wait to get married.

I stretched as I got out of bed and grinned as I inhaled the scent of breakfast. I slipped my slippers on and giggled as I made my way to the kitchen. The one thing I missed about living with my aunt was her cooking. She made the absolute best breakfast...well her and Merrick.

———————-

Merrick: After dropping off Amelia and the kids at Celina’s house, Chase came over with breakfast. Damen had spent the night to catch up and keep me from going to see Kiki. Both of which I knew I would eventually appreciate. Once we had our fill of the amazing breakfast skillets and hash browns Chase picked up, we took our coffee outside for a few minutes of calm looking out at the lake. Damen noticed the time, “Think you better start getting ready, Mer. We know it takes forever to do that hair of yours.” I thought Chase was going to choke on his coffee to keep from laughing.

After a few minutes of good-natured goofing off, Damen cleared up our dishes while Chase herded me to the shower while he laid out my suit and Damen’s. By the time I was showered and groomed, I was ready to go get married. Damen and Chase were discussing the big reception that everyone in the pack was invited to after our ceremony when I came out. After several whistles and requests for me to spin, they deemed me ready to get married. We headed outside and down to the ceremony site near the water.

———————-

Kiki: Breakfast was just as amazing as I remembered it. Even more so with everyone gathered around the table and eating, talking, and laughing. It was a great way to start this day. Before long everyone was full and sitting in the living room, talking about some of our favorite stories. Some of growing up, some from when we all moved here, just happy times.

When it was 2 hours before the wedding, everyone started ushering me upstairs to get dressed. I laughed as I pretended to drag my feet and made it a point that everyone needed to get ready, not just me. Before long, I was sitting in front of a mirror with Amelia doing my hair and Kenzi tackling my makeup. Once it was all done, I slipped into my dress and couldn’t help but grin. It all came together so perfectly. I couldn’t believe it was me standing in front of the mirror. My eyes teared up, “Oh my gosh!” Kenzi laughed, “Oh no, no crying! You’ll ruin your makeup!” She grabbed a tissue and started dabbing at my eyes to make sure the makeup didn’t get ruined. Then it was everyone else’s turn to get ready so we could go!

———————-

Merrick: When we arrived at the ceremony site, Alexi met us after making sure all the plans for the reception were well in hand. We talked for a few minutes about what a gorgeous day it was and how excited the pack was to celebrate the wedding all together. I hoped that it didn’t overwhelm my bride. All talking stopped when we heard a vehicle in the distance and Chase got a text. The ladies had arrived. Chase gave me a quick hug, then hurried off to get Jaden from Amelia and escort Celina down to the site.

Celina was beaming as she walked over to us on Chase’s arm and then hugged me tightly while he took a seat with his son. I held her as she whispered a few words in my ear that may have choked me up. She let go of me and reached up to caress my cheek with a smile before greeting Alexi and Damen. Once she was in place, Damen and I stood to her side and Alexi started some music on his phone. It played through Bluetooth speakers placed on either side of the rustic curtained arch we were using as an altar of sorts. Then everyone started to smile as Miranda started to toddle towards us in her lovely flower girl dress. As expected, she ran the last few feet to Daddy’s waiting arms. Then it was time for Kenzi. She seemed to float towards us, her eyes only on Alexi. She stopped on the other side of Celina and gave me a thumbs up. That was when my heart skipped a beat. My bride was next.

———————-

Kiki: I was a bundle of nerves. A part of me wanted to race down the aisle to Merrick’s waiting arms, but the other part of me was terrified I was going to face plant it walking up the aisle. I almost jumped when Amelia touched my arm, “Your turn,” she smiled. I grinned and nodded at her, “Am I supposed to be this nervous?” She laughed and told me it was normal. “Good, I was worrying that it was just me.” We both laughed and I hugged her, thanking her for everything that she had done for me and how much it meant to have her with me. Then I shut up before both of us were in tears.

I smoothed my hands down my dress and took my flowers from Amelia. “I’m ready!” She laughed and linked her arm through mine. I took a deep breath as the music started again. When I stepped into view, my eyes went straight to Merrick. He looked so handsome standing up there. I felt like we weren’t moving fast enough. I heard Amelia giggle and tell me to take it easy. I blushed and slowed my steps again. I think I held my breath until Amelia placed my hand in Merrick’s.

————————

Merrick: Once her hand was in mine, I could breathe again. We stood there for a long time simply looking into each other’s eyes. And then Celina cleared her throat and Damen rested his hand on my shoulder. Everyone laughed as we came back to earth and looked towards Celina. Kiki handed Kenzi her bouquet so she could take my other hand. We couldn’t seem to touch each other enough. Holding both hands would have to do for now. We laced our fingers together as Celina started to speak.

“We are gathered here today to witness and celebrate the union of Kiara Sawyer and Merrick Kingston. In the time that they have been together, their love for each other has grown, turning them into the couple you see before you. Now, they are ready to spend the rest of their lives together as husband and wife. A true marriage begins well before the wedding day, and the efforts of marriage continue well beyond the ceremony. A brief moment in time and the stroke of the pen are all that is required to create the legal bond of marriage, but it takes a lifetime of love, commitment, and compromise to make marriage durable and everlasting. Today you declare your commitment to each other before family and friends.”

As Celina’s voice proclaimed our intentions, I squeezed Kiki’s hands. I felt like this day was never going to arrive. Not for me. And then my bride smiled at me. That’s all it took and I was hers.

“Do you, Merrick, take Kiara to be your wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do you part?”

I grinned from ear to ear, “I do,”

“Do you, Kiara, take Merrick to be your Husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do you part?”

I swear I stopped breathing as I waited for her answer.

————————

Kiki: If it wouldn’t be for Merrick’s hands holding on to mine, I would have floated away. I couldn’t put my words into feelings. I was over the moon happy and I knew nothing could bring me down. Not today. When Merrick said I do, I was silently cheering.

I looked at Merrick and smiled, “I do!” I didn’t think Merrick’s smile could get any bigger, but it did.

“By the power vested in me by the State of Montana, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride!” As Merrick dipped me and kissed me, our ears exploded in applause from everyone around us. I slipped my arms around his neck tightly and returned his kiss. We were finally married. I laughed when we came up for air.

“Family and Friends, I present to you for the first time Kiara and Merrick Kingston!”

———————-

Merrick: She was mine and I was hers in front of family and friends for the rest of our days. I felt like my heart grew seven sizes larger as I kissed my wife. My wife! The fact that we were married finally hit me. I couldn’t stop laughing as everyone gathered round hugging us and congratulating us. Alexi gave me a look over Amelia’s shoulder as I hugged my sister-in-law. I winked at him with a grin as the music changed. Our friends started to form a small circle around us. It seemed to confuse my bride.

“Merrick?” I took the bouquet from her hands and handed it to Kenzi. “I know that the reception will be a big party with almost all the pack members present. So I asked Alexi to help me surprise you with our first dance here and now in this intimate circle of love. As Elton John’s voice started to serenade us, I slowly danced with my Tiny Dancer into the future. Our future together.

#rp #wedding

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smkkbert · 4 years

Text

Time for a story - Lost Canary

Beware! This is not a LL/BC fic!

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Drumming her fingers onto the steering wheel nervously, Felicity glanced at the time display of her dashboard. There had been a time in her life when she had never been late. She had always been on time because she had been well-organized and a hundred percent responsible when it came to any agreements. Then she had met Oliver and it had turned her life completely upside-down.

Felicity grinned to herself. Oliver loved to accuse him of infecting him with her babbles from time to time, so she loved teasing him with his infectious tardiness. In reality, it was a little different. Oliver babbled from time to time because he felt so utterly comfortable around her. Felicity couldn’t make it in time anymore because arranging a schedule around raising five kids, enjoying her marriage, leading a multi-billion-dollar cooperation, doing charity and saving the city just wasn’t that easy.

Despite all the changes in her life and her inability to make it in time a lot of times, Felicity wouldn’t want her life to be any other way. Every part of her life, as time consuming as each one was, was incredibly important to her. She couldn’t give up any of that. She would never give up on her children, and she needed Oliver like the air to breathe. Working at QI gave her life as it stimulated her intellect. Using so much of the money on charity made her feel good because she knew she could never spend all this fortune on herself. Making sure that this city was going to be a safer place was what let her sleep peacefully at the night.

She just couldn’t give up on any of those things. If that meant that she had to accept being late a lot of times and arranging her life around this crazy schedule she had put on herself, so be it. She’d do it because it was the life she had chosen and would continue to choose.

Parking the car in a free parking lot in front of Emmy’s dance school, Felicity shot another look at the time. She was already ten minutes late which wasn’t good. She preferred to be late to business meetings or even charity occasions, but never to anything that concerned the kids. They were the most important people, the ones she never wanted to be late for.

As Felicity got out of the car, another car stopped in the parking lot right next to hers. Frowning, she watched Oliver getting out.

“What are you doing here?” she asked. “It’s my turn to pick up Emmy from her ballet lessons. Besides, you were supposed to be in that meeting to talk about some budgeting decisions.”

“The meeting was canceled, so I drove home to change and decided to pick up Emmy, so you didn’t have to stress yourself out,” Oliver explained and pointed his thumb to the back of the car, “Addie decided to come with me.”

Felicity shot a look to the back of Oliver’s car where Addie was sitting in her children’s seat indeed. Through the darkened window panes, Felicity couldn’t see much, but it looked like Addie was wearing some kind of costumes. Feathers were moving on top of her head whenever the toddler moved.

Looking back at Olive, Felicity frowned. “Why didn’t you text me, and why are you five minutes late if you had so much time?”

“I am not late but ten minutes early since the lesson takes fifteen minutes longer today for whatever reason,” Oliver said, “and of course I texted you.”

“I didn’t receive a text,” Felicity said, starting to fish for her keys in her purse, “I mean I checked my phone regularly because there can always be reschedules, but- Oh, there it is!”

Puckering her lips, Felicity read Oliver’s short text.

O: Meeting was canceled. I will pick up Emmy, so don’t stress yourself out. Love you.

Felicity lifted her gaze and smiled at Oliver innocently. Dropping her phone into her purse, she crossed the distance towards her husband and pulled at the lapels of his leather jacket. Their lips met in a gentle kiss.

With all the chaos that seemed to surround them most times, Felicity and Oliver always made sure that they kissed each other when they saw each other again and said their I love yous before they parted ways. They knew better than most people that life was short and it could end anytime, so they couldn’t miss an opportunity to show their feelings to one another.

Their kiss was interrupted ungently when Addie opened the door of the car and hitting it right into Oliver’s back. Groaning slightly, he turned his head back over his shoulder. Addie smiled sweetly and somewhat apologizing and it was enough to make Oliver forget everything.

“Done waiting in the car?”

“Yes,” she replied and hugged Felicity’s legs, “hi, mommy.”

“Hi, Baby,” Felicity replied and tugged at some curly strands of hair came out from under the feather-cap, so Addie lifted her gaze and smiled at her mother, “what are you wearing?”

Felicity could feel Oliver’s eyes on her at the choice of words. He probably remembered as well as she did how he had asked her the same question once upon a time. His voice had been a lot darker though, even filled with a little bit of desire as he might have been a little turned on by her appearance although they hadn’t been dating or anything like that.

A warm shiver ran down the length of Felicity’s spine. What she and Oliver had now had started long before they had gotten married or before she had ambushed him with the decision that they would be together now whether he thought he was ready or not. It had started even before they had had their first date that had exploded before they had had a chance to try their lasagna. It had started in the bunker between catching criminals and forming their team of heroes.

“Tilly and Tally been at daycare.”

“Tilly and Tally have been at daycare?” Felicity asked. “Wow, that must have been excited.”

Addie nodded her head, proving that she was more than happy to have been in daycare today. Although they had Raisa, the Millie and Addie were going to daycare once to trice each week. That way, they had an opportunity to form friendships with other kids their age before they would be sent to kindergarten in a couple of days. Sometimes, like today it seemed, the daycare invited some special guests. Today they had probably invited the two old ladies that always dressed up and played the characters Tilly, the canary, and Tally, the cat, who were best friends.

“And where did you get that very cool costume?”

“From Tilly!” Addie exclaimed. “Everyone got a costume.”

“And now she will never ever take it off again,” Oliver whispered, “ever.”

Felicity exchanged a meaningful gaze with Oliver. Addie wasn’t their first child that had threatened to never ever get out of an outfit again. Last year, Millie had received a pair of pink gumboots with unicorns on them, and she had refused to take them off. She had even worn them in bed.

“Do I look like a canary, mommy?”

“Absolutely,” Felicity agreed, nodding her head, “you look exactly like a canary. If you want an expert’s opinion on that, maybe you should ask Aunt Laurel.”

“Because she’s the Black Canary,” Addie whispered so quietly that nobody but Felicity and Oliver could hear her, “right?”

Felicity nodded her head and winked at her youngest daughter. Since Addie seemed to be excited about that idea, Felicity would text Laurel on their way home. That way Laurel was warned about the visit later today, and she could already figure out a reason why it was important that Addie took off her costume before bed tonight. Maybe the feathers needed some rest or something.

As they went inside the school building now, Addie was walking between her parents. Her right hand was safely tugged into Oliver’s fingers, while Felicity was holding her right hand. Addie enjoyed the safety of being held by her parents like that visibly. She was swaying her arms and her parents�� arms back and forth happily.

The dance class was still going when they arrived. Oliver, Felicity and Addie pushed into the room quickly and sat down on one of the benches for visitors. Emmy discovered them there immediately, waving her hand. When they waved back, she beckoned for Addie to come and join them.

“Can I?” Addie asked, turning her head back to look at her mother. “Please.”

“Sure,” Felicity replied, “just let me take of your shoes and jacket.”

As soon as Felicity had pulled the boots from Addie’s feet and she had slipped out of her jacket, Addie ran to join her sister at the ballet bar. Watching the two of them, Felicity slid close to Oliver and rested her head on his shoulder. Quiet moments like these were her favorite, especially after chaotic days like today.

“I have looked into the data we have gathered about the Triad,” Felicity whispered, not lifting her head from Oliver’s shoulder, “and I think I have narrowed the number of possible next targets down to three. I have put all three of them under surveillance.”

Oliver turned his head to place his lips against the crown of her head. Felicity sighed contently, leaning even more against Oliver’s side. If it wasn’t for him, she was sure that her chaotic and stressful life wouldn’t work as well as it did right now. Somehow, they always managed to accommodate all the different things they had to do.

“Thank you,” Oliver whispered, “between all the meetings you had today, I guess that cost a lot of energy.”

Felicity shrugged her shoulders. “That way, we have tonight all for ourselves.”

At that, Oliver started to listen attentively it seemed. He straightened up a little, tightening his arm around Felicity’s waist at the same time.

“Do you have any suggestions what we could do with our time?”

“Oh, I have a lot of ideas.”

“Really?” Oliver’s hand started drifting down her waist towards her hip. “Like what?”

Felicity angled her head back to look at Oliver. She knew exactly what ideas he had in mind for the night, and she couldn’t say that was disinclined to agree with his plans. If her core was asked, she should probably take Oliver to some dark equipment room and let him take her right here. That was how hot she still was for her husband.

Still, she had different plans for tonight.

“Sleep,” Felicity told him, “I really, really want to sleep.”

Oliver chuckled and pecked her lips. They lingered against hers for a moment, and his fingers brushed against the edge of her jaw. When he pulled back, his eyes were sparkling with amusement.

“Sleep sounds great.”

Felicity nodded her head. “It really does, doesn’t it?”

Chuckling, Oliver leaned in to kiss her once more. Before their lips touched, Ms. Voronov ended the class, thanking all participants for giving their best and applauding their progress. Oliver scrunched up his nose, probably about to complain that the class should have last a minute longer, but Felicity just pecked his lips briefly and got up.

“Mommy!”

Felicity chuckled as she saw Addie trying to imitate the movements she had just learned. She might not look as gracious as her older sister yet, but she could probably join a younger class if she wanted to. So far, Addie had never really shown any interest at ballet. Since she was turning three in less than two months, maybe she was just discovering this hobby for herself.

“You two look great,” Felicity told the kids, “in a couple of years, you can probably dance in Swan Lake.”

“Maybe we can go one down and start with the summer performance.”

Surprised, Felicity turned around to see Mrs. Voronov stepping towards her. The ballet teacher was already in her fifties, but her eyes exuded something very young. There was also a warmth that took away from the strict appearance that was created by her slim figure and the tight bun she had put her hair in.

“Mrs. Voronov, hello,” Felicity said, shaking her hand, “thank you for your class. Emmy loves to be here.”

“I am very glad to hear that.” Mrs. Voronov smiled. “Mrs. Queen, Mayor Queen, I wanted to talk to you about our summer event.”

Oliver stepped right next to Felicity, shaking the ballet teacher’s hand too before he nodded his head for her to tell them what she wanted to say.

“Emmy has got a real talent here,” Mrs. Voronov explained with a look at where Emmy was now trying to teach Addie how to look even more gracious while dancing, “and she is a really compliant student which makes her one of my best in this group.”

Felicity and Oliver exchanged a proud smile. All parents certainly loved to hear that they children were doing great in school or at their hobbies or whatever. It was just a good feeling to know your child had found something they were good at. Every child needed to experience something like that.

“We’ve got a big summer show,” Mrs. Voronov continued, “where my older classes are performing together for one big story. I always invite some of my best younger students to take some smaller roles. We have already started training, but I still have two roles to assign. I would like Emmy to take one of the roles.”

“That sounds great,” Oliver said, “really great actually.”

“Absolutely,” Felicity agreed, “have you already told Emmy?”

“No,” Mrs. Voronov replied, shaking her head, “because I always talk to the parents first. Taking part in this summer show means that Emmy would have to come to additional training lessons, even at the weekends, and she would have to be in Starling the entire August which is when we will perform.”

Oliver and Felicity exchanged a long gaze. Mrs. Voronov’s words proved that there was a lot of work ahead of them. Emmy would need her parents’ support to make it work, and they had to work one more thing into their busy schedules. They wouldn’t be the good parents they were if they let that take away a chance like this.

“I think the only person who can decide this is Emmy,” Oliver said, “so I guess it’s best if we just ask her.”

Felicity nodded her head and looked at where Emmy was still trying to teach Addie. The girls seemed to have so much fun that Felicity honestly considered getting a ballet bar for their playroom. There was so much room there that this might be a great addition. Maybe Millie or Tommy would like to try ballet too.

“Emmy,” she asked, reaching out he hand for Emmy, “come here please.”

Emmy left Addie’s side and quickly ran towards her parents. Felicity pulled her in front of her, so her back was pressed to Felicity’s front. She put her hands to her daughter’s shoulders and looked at her. Emmy angled her head back as much as possible, frowning slightly.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” she asked, frowning slightly. “Am I in trouble?”

“No,” Felicity replied with a chuckle, shaking her head, “there is actually something good happening here because Mrs. Voronov would like you to become a part of her big summer show.”

“Really?” Emmy asked, and her excitement was written all over her face. “But only older kids are allowed to take part.”

“I always have some smaller roles for my younger students,” Mr. Voronov told her, “and I really think you are the right match.”

“That is so cool, I-“

“Before you agree,” Oliver hurried to say and crouched down a little, so his eyes were on one level with Emmy’s, “I want you to think about this carefully. If you agree to this, there is a lot of work ahead of you. You have to be very disciplined, and you cannot just give up. People will count on you to do this, so have to try your best. Can you do that?”

Emmy thought about it carefully, making Felicity smile. Of course Emmy wouldn’t make a rushed decision if Oliver told her to think about it carefully. Emmy might be excited, but she knew what a big decision this was.

“I want to do it,” Emmy said eventually, looking right at Oliver, “and I will always give my best.”

“If that is what you want,” Oliver said and kissed her cheek, “then I already know that you will be great.”

“Thanks, Daddy.”

Felicity squeezed Emmy’s shoulders, making her daughter look at her. She leaned down and kissed Emmy’s lips then. It was all Emmy needed to know that she had both of her parents’ support for this.

“I will send you the training and show plan via email,” Mrs. Voronov said with a smile before she turned to Emmy, “welcome to the team, Emmy.”

“Thank you.”

Mrs. Voronov left them alone to talk to some other parents. While Oliver straightened up, Emmy stepped away from Felicity to turn around and look at both of their parents.

“This really is a big deal,” she said, putting her hands to her hips and taking a deep breath, “a really big deal.”

Oliver nodded his head and put his hand to her shoulder. “You can do this. Mrs. Voronov wouldn’t have chosen you otherwise.”

“I know,” Emmy said, “but I really think I need pizza to get over this shock and celebrate it too. I just really need pizza.”

Oliver turned his head, looking at Felicity with an expression she knew all too well. He blamed her for their daughter’s request for junk food when they all knew that he had probably planned some healthy dinner already. Felicity lifted her hands in a sign of innocence. If Oliver’s facial expression was any indication, he didn’t believe he.

“It wasn’t mom’s idea,” Emmy said, leaning against Oliver’s legs, “I just really want pizza today. Please, daddy, please!”

Felicity rolled her lips into her mouth to bite back her amused laughter. Emmy was really good at coaxing Oliver into doing whatever she wanted. All kids had that talent, and Felicity wasn’t immune of it either. Luckily, Oliver was at the receiving end of Emmy’s angel’s eyes right now though. That she was calling him daddy instead of dad helped to make him crumble instantly. Felicity could see it in Oliver’s eyes.

“Okay, fine,” he said with a groan, “but just today.”

“Thank you, daddy,” Emmy said, “you are the best.”

Again, Oliver just grumbled at that before he turned away. As soon as his back was turned towards them, Felicity held out her flat hand for Emmy. Grinning, Emmy gave her five. They really were a great team when it came to making sure they got their good junk food.

“Now, let’s get Addie and go home to your siblings, so we can take all their orders and-“

When Felicity noticed the expression on Oliver’s face, she stopped. Frowning, she followed his gaze through the dance hall, but there was nothing to be seen there. There was nothing that caught Felicity’s attention or alarmed her in any way.

“What’s wrong?” Felicity asked. “What’s going on?”

“Can you see Addie?”

The question made Felicity’s heart jump up into her throat. She grabbed Emmy’s hand and pulled the girl closer to herself instantly as she was looking around to find her youngest daughter. Between all the little girls that were dressed in their training outfits, it should be easy to find Addie. She significantly smaller than all the other girls, and her yellow costume caught attention easily.

With racing heart, Felicity realized that Addie just wasn’t here. Panic flooded every cell of her body. Her throat felt tight, unable to take in a breath. Her thoughts were spinning, so many ideas of what might have happened already playing out in her head.

Oliver turned around to Felicity, looking at her with what she guessed was supposed to be a comforting or at least a calming gaze. Still, Felicity could see his own turmoil through it because she just knew Oliver like that. She knew that he was just as nervous as she was. Their lives were dangerous, and their kids were more endangered of getting abducted than other kids were. They were rich. Oliver was the mayor. They were vigilantes.

“I will search the rest of the building,” Oliver said, “you go outside and check there.”

Felicity nodded her head. “I will take Emmy with me.”

“Okay.”

They both moved at the same time. While Oliver was running out of the hall and down the hallway, Felicity hurried towards the exit. Her fingers were tightened around Emmy’s hand firmly as she pulled her with her.

“Mom, where’s Addie?” Emmy asked worried, having caught up to the fact that her little sister had been nowhere to be seen. “She was here a minute ago.”

“I know,” Felicity replied, trying to hide her nervousness, “so she is probably somewhere around here. Maybe she lost sight of us and tried to search for us.”

“We will certainly find her.”

“Yes, of course we will.”

Although Felicity tried her best to sound hopeful, she doubted that it was enough to convince Emmy. The little girl was smarter than to ask any more questions though. She knew the situation wasn’t an easy one. After all, Emmy had been abducted before too.

A cold shiver ran down the length of Felicity’s spine as she thought about the two times that Emmy had been abducted. The first time, she had still been in Felicity’s belly, the one place where kids were supposed to be safe. That other time, she had been with Felicity, and still they had been in the hands of criminals.

Felicity had lived through being abducted a couple of times now, but it had never been as bad as the one time that Emmy and Tommy had been taken too. Watching out for your own life was hard. Watching out for your children’s life was something entirely else. Everything was more intense when it was about the kids.

That Addie was nowhere to be found outside didn’t help Felicity to relax the least. There were so many possible threats to their family that number of suspects was almost uncountable. She would have to mobilize every force she could to find Addie if she wasn’t going to show up here magically. She would mobilize the team as well as their friends from Starling City. She would ask Bruce to help and bring everyone with a little experience in this business from Gotham too. She’d ask for Supergirl to come help. Anatoli would have to-

“Mom, your phone!”

Felicity flinched at the loud tone of Emmy’s voice. She had been so deep in thought that it cost her a moment before she realized that Emmy was talking to her and probably had been talking to her for a while.

“What?” Felicity asked.

“Your phone beeped,” Emmy replied, “you got a text.”

Taking Emmy’s hand from her left to her right, Felicity pulled her phone from the pocket of her coat and checked for any new texts. She had indeed received a text by Oliver that made her heart jump up into her throat once more before she opened it.

O: Found her! Come to room 25.

“Daddy found Addie,” Felicity said with a sigh of relief and felt like a burden of several tons was taken off her shoulders, “do you know where room twenty-five is?”

“Of course,” Emmy replied immediately, “come on.”

With just as quick steps as Felicity had hurried outside before, Emmy was taking her back in now. She dragged Felicity through several hallways and some stairs up until Felicity could finally see Oliver.

“Where is she?” she asked when she couldn’t see Addie. “Where is-“

“Here,” Oliver said, beckoning for the two of them to come closer, “you gotta watch this.”

Only once they arrived at Oliver’s side, Felicity dared to let go of Emmy’s hand. She looked at Oliver, still not understanding what got him to be so relaxed already. He nodded his chin towards the glass wall they were standing in front of. Frowning, Felicity turned her head-

And finally got what got Oliver to be so amused.

Addie was standing in the middle of an adult dance class. Everyone, including the instructor, was standing around Addie, watching what she was doing and imitating her movements. When Addie stood there with widened legs, bending her knees and alternating what foot to put her weight on, all of them did the same. When Addie moved her butt in tiny circles, everyone else did too. When Addie tried to do some Yoga position that she must have caught up somewhere, the entire class mimicked her movements.

That Addie was still wearing that yellow costume that was made of so many feathers just added something to the funniness of the picture in front of Felicity. A toddler instructing an adult dance group was funny already, but a toddler in a canary costume instructing an adult dance group was just beyond hilarious.

After those last minutes of shock, the laughter that fell from her lips now felt incredibly good to her. It washed over her and took away all the stressful feelings she had gathered before.

“Addie can train me at home now, so I am really fit for the summer show, or she can offer a class here while I am training,” Emmy said with an amused chuckle, “Addie-Dancing.”

“I am sure people will take kindly to it,” Felicity agreed, “I mean just look at this.”

Addie was doing some weirdly wrenching movements with her arms now. No matter how hard it looked to mimic what she was doing there and how ridiculous it looked, the class managed to do the same.

It was obvious how much Addie enjoyed this, and Felicity couldn’t hold it against her. Just watching her was already a joy.

“Maybe we should do dance classes at home,” Felicity suggested, bumping her hip against Oliver’s playfully, “what do you say?”

It was meant as a joke since Felicity knew that Oliver didn’t like to dance and doing whatever it was that Addie was trying to teach the class inside was probably even more horrifying for him. Looking at Oliver, Felicity could see him considering this though. When it came to the kids, he was doing a lot of things he had never thought he would do after all.

Chuckling, Oliver replied, “Hey, if she is our instructor, I am willing to try.”

* * *

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