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scalingsvt8thusiast · 23 days

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Skin-Deep chapter 12

summary: The one where you fall for Seungcheol amongst all the protests and insecurities. The one where you don't know that he's fallen for you too.

a/n: Enjoy! :)

Ensconced in a velvet armchair, you sat surrounded by your friends who were howling with laughter.

“They said what?” Yunjin said in between tears, clutching her stomach from the pain of laughing too hard.

“I cannot FATHOM anyone saying that to you,” Shuhua cried, wiping the tears from her eyes, trying her best not to smudge her mascara.

“God, what is up with her ceiling?” Somi laughed, imagining a bunch of naked people on the ceiling, “New money people, I can never understand.”

“Talk about bad taste, who the fuck puts stained glass in their dining room?” Jihyo added, sipping on her tea.

You had just finished relaying the drama from the past month to your friends whilst jewellery shopping at your favourite store. The five of you sat facing one another with a bucket load of jewellery spread out on a coffee table in the middle. The shop assistants constantly bringing out all of their best jewellery for each of you to inspect.

“You should have slapped her!” Shuhua commented, mimicking a slapping motion in the air. “I know I would have! Insulting my bestie like that.”

Shuhua was your most outspoken friend. Her father was renowned as the Grocery King of Taiwan, owning almost all of the supermarkets and groceries store in the country. She always made sure to send out boxes of the best fruits and vegetables to her best friends. Their mothers appreciating the present more than any of their daughters.

“And his father! ‘You need a right girl by your side’.” Jihyo mimicked, “Go back to the 70s, old man! No one wants you here!”

Jihyo, who was extremely appaled by backwards thinking, was the daughter of the Gold Kingdom. Her family held monopoly over the trade of gold globally. Jihyo was regularly decked out in gold, but she didn’t mind shopping for other sorts of jewellery.

“How does your son’s choice of girlfriend affect your company’s survivability?” Somi said, rolling her eyes, “does he know nothing about business?”

Somi, your ever business savvy friend, had just returned from completing her MBA. This was to prepare her to inherit her mother’s massive cosmetics empire. In fact all the makeup on your face right now was a gift from Somi.

“I literally just looked up their company while you were talking. They’re worth what? 20 bil?” Yunjin turned her phone to show you a report. “And they’re so bloody arrogant!”

Yunjin, who was more interested in people’s net worths, hailed from a family who ran the world's most successful banking co-operation. This grants her access to all the secretive reports of various companies and high net worth individuals around the world.

Where Seungcheol had Joshua and Jeonghan, you had Shuhua, Jihyo, Somi and Yunjin.

The five of you had been friends since you were children, your parents all knew each other so naturally you grew up together. Majority of your youth was spent flying all over the world for shopping trips and holidays together. The only reason you separated was because you wanted to experience life without your parent’s money for once. You’d regularly keep up with them while you were at uni but it wasn’t the same as seeing them face to face. You missed the support your girlfriends gave you after being surrounded by boys for months.

“Guys, it’s honestly fine.” You said, holding your hand up to the light, inspecting the massive diamond around your finger. “I’ve left and I’m not looking back. That part of my life is over.”

“Which part of your life is over?” A voice sounded from behind you.

“Vernon!” Your friends chorused.

Your brother, waltzed up to the table. Giving each one of your friends a wave.

“Oh, you’re here early.” You said, placing the ring back on the table. Large stones attracted unwanted attention, not your taste.

“Yea, we should probably leave now, you know how mom and dad get when we’re late.” Vernon said, motioning to the door.

You sent your friend’s an apologetic smile, “Sorry guys, let’s continue another day?”

A wave of goodbyes came from your friends as you and your brother left the shop, his Mclaren Senna parked at the main doors.

Once you were comfortably seated in the car, you began running through your activities for the night.

“After dinner, are we going over to Gyu’s place?” You said, your freshly manicured nails tapping against your phone.

“Yea, it’s just going to be the few of us I think.” Vernon answered, driving carefully around a crowd who was snapping photos of his car.

“How long do you think dinner with mom and dad will be?” You questioned, still replying to messages on your phone.

“Probably like 2 hours tops? We might be a lil’ late to Gyu’s place.” Vernon replied, “Gosh, sis, your nails are giving me a headache.”

You turn to your brother with an evil grin. You reached your hand out and grabbed his arm, digging your nails into his skin.

Vernon yelped. “HEY! I’m driving!”

“That’s what you get for being annoying,” You say with a smirk before continuing to tap on your phone.

Vernon’s eye twitched the entire ride home.

You hopped out of the car and skipped up the steps of the front porch. Vernon trailing behind you with hands in his pockets.

“Young sir, young madam.” The maid had come out to greet the two of you, bowing as you passed her. “Dinner is ready.”

“Thanks!” You called out over your shoulder and made your way to the dining room.

This bungalow was your parent’s most recent acquisition. It had gone on the market quite recently, some Duke who had fallen from grace was looking to make a pretty penny so he sold it to your mom. She had been eyeing the property for awhile now, claiming that she thought about you immediately when she saw the massive walk-in closet in the main bedroom. It was added to the list of properties you were set to inherit when you were older.

In the dining room, your parents sat next to each other at a sensibly sized round table.

“Hi mommy,” You say as you gave her a side hug. Your mother gave you a kiss on your cheek before continuing to read her magazine.

“Hi daddy,” Doing the same to your father who was immersed in his newspaper.

“Mom, dad.” Vernon greeted with a nod.

“Oh finally the two of you are back, we’ve been waiting forever.” Your mother said, putting away her magazine as she peered at her children from the top of her reading glasses.

“Your mom’s just hangry.” Your dad flashed you a mischievous smile, ignoring his wife’s warning glare.

The maid entered with a trolley of food, proceeding to lay it out on the lazy susan. You much prefer these sort of meals than all those pretentious fine dining restaurants. Food was meant to be simple and identifiable, some people clearly did not understand that.

Dinner was filled with idle chatter, you father was talking about the new venture he was thinking of in Thailand while your mom updated her children on the coming events they had to attend.

“Aunty and Uncle Yoon are coming to town to visit.” Your mother announced. “I expect both of you to make yourselves available.”

“Sure mom,” you and Vernon chorused.

“I think they’re bringing their son eh?” Your dad said in between mouthfuls of rice. “Maybe you two could show him around.”

And that is how you found yourself face to face with the one and only Yoon Jeonghan.

“Y/N my dear!” Mrs Yoon gushed, holding your hands, “Every time we see you, you get prettier and prettier!”

“This is Jeonghan, my son. I don’t think the three of you have met.” Mr Yoon said, gesturing to Jeonghan who was currently giving you a shit-eating grin.

“Y/n!” Jeonghan cried, giving you a hug.

“Hannie!” You quickly returned his hug, you weren’t expecting to see Jeonghan at all. “This is my brother, Vernon.”

Vernon politely shook Jeonghan’s hand, exchanging quick greetings.

“Oh? Have you met y/n?” Mrs Yoon asked her son.

“Yes, we met at uni.” Jeonghan said, giving his mom a reassuring smile.

“Ok, we’ll leave you kids alone now!” Your mom said, giving your arm a squeeze.

“Unless you guys want to sit through a meeting with us?” Your dad offered.

The three of your faces contorted into a look of disgust.

“I think we’ll pass.” Vernon said, scrunching up his face.

Jeonghan waited until his parents disappeared from the room before giving you an excited look.

“So this is where you were the whole time!” He chirped. “I thought you had been kidnapped when you fell off the face of the earth like that.”

Vernon narrowed his eyes at Jeonghan, “Is this the guy you were telling me about?”

You shook your head, “No, this is his friend.”

“Ah,” Vernon crossed his arms, giving Jeonghan a disapproving look. “Guilty by association.”

Jeonghan chuckled nervously, “I promise I’m harmless.”

Vernon continued to eye the older man suspiciously.

“I’m sorry for disappearing like that, Hannie.” You sighed. “Trust me if I had it my way I would have said good bye first.”

“Hey, it’s fine.” Jeonghan waved a hand, dismissing your apology. “If that happened to me, I would leave too.”

“Did you guys hear about what happened?” You asked, wondering if Seungcheol was the type to gossip.

“Not in the way you’re thinking.” Jeonghan quickly replied, as if reading your mind. "Shua had to pay some people to find out.”

“Oh,” You paused, “Why didn’t you just ask Seungcheol?”

“I-,” Jeonghan paused, glancing wearily in the direction of your parents. “Let’s not talk about it here. There’s a lot I need to update you on.”

The three of you found yourselves having tea at the Mariott. You had called up Mingyu beforehand, who insisted on coming as well, to secure a table.

“Mingyu’s on his way?” Jeonghan said, excited that he finally got to see his friends in their natural habitat.

“Yup, there he is now.” Your eyes darted to your best friend who jogged into the restaurant.

“Have you started?” Mingyu said breathlessly, “Tell me you guys haven’t started.”

“No, bro, sit down.” Vernon gestured to the chair before making a face. “You’re sweaty as fuck.”

“Gym.” Mingyu replied still clad in gym clothes, he wiped the sweat off his forehead before sitting down.

“Alright, now that we’re all here,” Jeonghan began, leaning forward, “you should know, Cheol hasn’t been himself these days.”

He recounted all the events that happened, starting from the day you and Seungcheol broke up and all the way to them confronting him at his apartment.

You didn’t know how to feel. Part of you was happy that Seungcheol was just as upset as you, part of you was sad because you knew things between you and him would never go back to normal. Was he considering getting back together with you? Did you want to get back together with him?

“It’s great he’s suffering and all. But that doesn’t give him the right to be an asshole.” Mingyu voiced out. His eyed the table of sweets in front of him as if he was strategising for war.

“Why didn’t he talk to y/n first before disappearing and breaking up with her?” Mingyu continued with a look of contempt.

“Because he’s an idiot.” Jeonghan replied, in between mouthfuls of pastries. “Not an excuse, I know.”

“I think you two should have a proper conversation,” Vernon sipped on his tea.

“Well obviously not you,” He gestured to his sister, “I mean like he should have a conversation with you.”

“Yeah, well.” You shrugged, “I want to talk to him, but he’s clearly intent on keeping me out of his life so-”

“When we told him about well, you.” Jeonghan gestured to you and his surroundings, “He looked really relieved.”

You placed a Madeleine into your mouth and looked out the window, lost in thought. In the background you could hear Mingyu arguing with Vernon and Jeonghan.

Mingyu rolled his eyes, “Honestly, I don’t trust Seungcheol on this. If you ask him to choose between y/n and his family, who would he choose? My money is on his family.”

“Actually, I think it would be y/n.” Jeonghan said with conviction. “You should have seen him. It was like armageddon had arrived on the choi family home.”

“I don’t know the guy, but I think he would choose you, sis.” Vernon said, nodding vigorously.

a/n2: I'm actually quite unsatisfied with quality of my writing. but i hope you all enjoyed it all the same.

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sapphos-ode · 10 months

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Little Cat

Part 9

Larissa Weems part 8 | part 10 | ao3

As promised, here’s the first part of the Harvest Festival! Enjoy <3 I didn’t write this in one sitting last night instead of getting sleep so it’s a little jumpy, soz

TW: there is a panic attack and I do describe it so please be careful if that would trigger you or if you’re sensitive to it. Please take care of yourself x

The last two days of the school week sees you feeling a little low - but you do a good job at hiding it, enough for your students and colleagues not to notice. The cause isn't anything that's happened in your life, more so the happenings of other peoples’. Although the facade works on most people, Alice sees through it and like any good friend she’s waltzed into your quarters unannounced. You pay her no mind, not taking your eyes off of the tv - today you had settled on an old Disney Princess classic, ‘Snow White and the Seven Dwarves’ to be specific. You’re also halfway through a tub of ice cream, no bowl in sight, just the carton and a trusty teaspoon.

“It’s time for a therapy sesh! Turn that shit off,” Alice declares as she lets the door slam behind her.

You acquiesce and mute the film. She makes a beeline for your cutlery drawer grabbing a dessert spoon before jumping onto the couch next to you, worming her way under the blanket with you.

“Get that big ass spoon away from me and my ice cream,” you growl, giving her a healthy amount of side eye even though you allow her to dig into the ice cream with you.

“There’s nothing wrong with my spoon,”

You let out a half hearted chuckle before resting your head on her shoulder.

“I’m alright. Just soaked in too many emotions this week is all,”

“That’s good to hear but still, talk,”

You glance up at her, an appreciative look in your eyes. You had done a Bachelors with honours in English literature at university alongside a PGDE allowing you to go straight into teaching after graduating. You’re not sure how you secured the post at Nevermore but you did and it was the best thing to happen to you. Your friendship with Alice was a lifeline you didn’t realise you needed, she was only a year your senior but that llittle bit more life experience she had was invaluable. The friendship wasn’t one sided however. You helped her just as much as she helped you. She was less intune with her emotions than you, and when she struggled to name what she was feeling you'd be there to help her figure it out - there were perks to being an empath.

You take a deep inhale, “There’s not much to talk about, a few students are feeling… down, depressed, you name it, and I’ve kinda just absorbed it all,” you poke at the ice cream with your spoon, “also it reminded me of my mum, she was very against me moving here. She wanted me to teach at a local highschool in my hometown.”

You look up at Alice and she nods, silently telling you to continue on.

“I was really excited when I was invited to interview here, and then to actually hear back and be told I was offered the job? Couldn’t have been happier… but when I told my mum she just felt nothing. Bit of a bummer right? Anger would’ve been better than her apathy.” You let out a hollow bark of a laugh, “She could have at least pretended to be happy about it, think that’s why I’m feeling more down than usual,”

Alice nods along to your words, stealing another spoonful of ice cream before speaking, “She’ll come round to it, she’ll just be anxious about you being so far away, you are from Cali after all,”

“True, I have quite literally moved to the other side of the country, but I went to uni a few states over, and she wasn’t like that…” you pause for a moment, “it’s whatever though, besides, I’m going to the Harvest Festival with Larissa tomorrow. Oh!!! I forgot to tell you! I’m so sor- Owww!”

You tear yourself away from her to nurse your arm from where Alice had slapped you. With a mouth full of ice cream she had resorted to giving you a dirty glare.

“I’m sorry!” you whined, “I meant to tell you… promise,” you fall back onto her shoulder.

“I’ll forgive you if you tell me the details, did you ask her?”

“No, she asked me, she was so nervous it was adorable,”

“Y’know, for how much you fawn over her for her confidence and stuff, you call her cute quite a lot, I wouldn’t use that word to describe her, personally.”

“But she is, what would you say instead then?”

“Hot.”

“That’s so true,”

“I think there’s two Principal Weems though, you always talk about this woman who’s so… so Bambi like around you!”

“She hardly talked to me until like recently,”

“Really? She scares me to be honest, she’s so sure of herself and she knows she’s got everyone at her beck and call,”

“Exactly why she’s so hot! But seriously, she only ever talked to me about work, and even then she always kept it super short, like even for a professional conversation…”

“I think she likes you, that’s the only explanation. Why else would someone not talk to you then suddenly act all docile?”

“You’re more delusional than I am,” you scoff.

You turn the volume up a little to ease the quiet. The pair of you watch the movie, making good progress on the ice cream. You have another tub in the freezer which you know you’ll have to bring out eventually.

“I only really feel more negative emotions from people, but when Larissa asked me to the festival… I don’t know what I felt from her, but it was like a warm emotion? The closest I could describe it as is love but that would be so out of context for the situation.” you speak over the twelve dwarve’s song from when they’re digging around the mine.

“You do feel happier emotions though, right?”

“Yeah, but usually only when they’re really strong.”

“Hmm, that is odd.”

“Yeah, just remembered that the now,” you leave the conversation at that. Not having the energy to dissect what it could mean.

It was well into the night, you and Alice had watched several movies, and now you were watching ‘The Notebook’. You sniffle a little as a few tears drop onto Alice’s t-shirt.

“Are you crying?”

“No!”

Alice ended up staying over at yours, as you talk about your deepest fears, it reminds you of the sleepovers you’d have as a teenager. When you were spilling your soul out to people you thought would never leave your life.

You’re thankful for Alice not leaving you with your own thoughts.

You stand at your floor length mirror, scrutinising your outfit, you had spent the day organising lessons for the following week and before you knew it, it was time to leave for the Harvest Festival. You finally decide that your clothes would do before tossing on a jacket and scarf, it was getting so cold these days.

“Why did I fuss so much? Don’t even see them under this coat,” you mutter before grabbing your keys and heading to Larissa’s office.

You’re a little early to meet Larissa but you were restless, you hadn’t seen her since she had so clumsily asked you to join her, apart from organising times. You knock on the door and wait for her to call you in, her saccharine voice is heard clearly even through the heavy doors. That woman’s power would be the end of you.

“Hey, you ready?,” you say as you poke your head through the threshold before fully entering the room.

You hadn’t really been in Larissa’s office much, the first few weeks she had called you in every now and then to make sure you were settling in okay. The room was overwhelming, as was most of Nevermore. The ceiling was outrageously high, and Larissa always had that fireplace roaring with flames. The room was cast in a darker light but still illuminated enough that you weren’t squinting to see. You look around in awe, taking in the taxidermies bear, and the mirrors on the ceilings. Odd placement but you think nothing of it. Eventually your sights are turned to Larissa, framed by the rich red velvet curtains and grand window. She sat at her desk, laptop open, a heart meltingly tender smile on her lips as she looked at you through her lashes, head downturned just a touch.

“Never been more ready,” she purrs as she rounds her desk and grabs her coat before sauntering over to you. Her eyes never leaving you.

She stops very close to you, so close you can smell her perfume, it was the same earthy citrus scent from last week. And just like it had back then, it had your head spinning.

“I’ll spare you and let you drive this time,”

“You’re too kind to me,” she humours you.

You shake your head at her before placing a hand on the small of her back and usher her to the door. Larissa’s heart flutters at the action.

With childlike wonder you soak in the carnival, you loved them and hadn’t had many chances to go to them when you were younger. As you stand in awe at the entrance, flocks of people walking around you, Larissa is too busy looking at you with the same amazement. Studying your profile and committing it to memory, she notices a faint white scar on the corner of your jaw and she wants to know how you got it.

“Shall we?” An angelic voice cuts you free from your thoughts as you look to Larissa.

A little embarrassed at yourself you nod before you feel your stomach cry out. Your cheeks redden as you smile at her apologetically.

“Can we get food first?”

You watch Larissa eat, her eyes closed as she relishes the first bite. You can’t help but stare at her, she was so adorable and this felt very domestic.

“You know, I never thought you’d be the kind to enjoy a greasy burger,”

Larissa pauses mid chew, eyes a little wide in confusion. Her cheeks puffed out like a hamster.

“You just seem like you have a fancy palate, you know, like you enjoy those niche foods that are so exclusive and coveted but actually taste like ass,” you continue, leaning your chin on one hand. The other fiddling with the edge of the table as you pick at the worn down wood that was fraying with age.

Larissa swallows her mouthful slowly before speaking, “And what exactly does that mean?”

“Nothing, just one of my observations,” your tone is lighthearted.

“Just one of?” Larissa is intrigued now.

“Mhmm,” you don’t elaborate further as you tuck into your own burger.

Your eyes blow wide as you stare her down. This was a good burger, she was right. As you had perused the food stalls Larissa had talked your ear off about this particular vendor, raving on and on about how she waited for each Festival for it. She gave you a smug smile.

With a loud thwack you finally land the third arrow into the bullseye, turns out you were a natural at archery despite never having touched a bow and arrow before now. Well, that may be an exaggeration, this was your fourth attempt at the stall, with Larissa encouraging you from a safe distance behind. Your competitive streak and ego not allowing you to give up until you had won the game. You also had a certain blonde woman to impress. Stakes were high.

You were beaming with joy as you whispered to the man, pointing out what prize you wanted. As he goes to pull it down for you, you look over your shoulder to see Larissa talking to one of the art teachers who had been passing by. With her distracted you were able to thank the man and hide the stuffed toy behind your back. You wait patiently by her side for the conversation to finish.

“Pray tell what your trophy is,” she turns to you, with a proud look in her eyes. Your heart swells and you want her to look at you like that more often.

“More yours than it is mine.” You procure a white stuffed cat and hold it out to her. It’s of a larger size.

The Principal smiles in disbelief as she takes it from your hands, “For me?”

“Why else do you think I kept at that rigged game for so long!” You llink your arm in hers as you wander off into the crowds. Larissa allows herself to be led along as she studies the plush, it was eerily similar to her form as a cat. A horrible feeling forms in her stomach, did you know? Surely not? She decides it's just a coincidence and tucks it into her other arm, allowing herself to feel flattered you had given her a gift. She’d cherish it.

“Have you- ”

“There’s Principal Weems!” Just as you’re about to ask Larissa something, Marilyn has called over, with Alice in tow. She’s waving over at you from another stall.

You and Larissa stop as the duo walks over.

“Perfect!” Marilyn says as she notices you with the Principal, she must not have seen you over all the people. “I finally found someone willing to go through the haunted house with me, but the carts seat four people and I don’t fancy screaming with strangers, and, well, there’s two of you! Come on! The queues not long,” The botany teacher doesn't give you room to argue before she's pulling you, and Larissa who’s still got her arm linked with yours.

You look at Alice who just shrugs, seemingly unbothered by everything, then you look up at Larissa who's started to converse with Marilyn.

You squeeze your eyes shut and take a few controlled breaths.

The redhead was right, the queue moved quickly, too quickly. Before you can protest, you’re shoved into the seat with Larissa. You just sit stock still as she comments about how they’ve really outdone themselves with the models this year. You don’t really register what she's saying.Faintly you can hear Alice and Marilyn talking about their favourite rides.

With a juddering move, the cart starts to advance as it takes you through a cheap black curtain. Your hands are clammy and you're visibly trembling in your seat. You’re shrouded in darkness before a light flashes on to reveal an unnervingly realistic skeleton drop from the ceiling right next to you. You can’t conceal the scream as you jerk away from it, bumping into Larissa. Her hands find purchase on your hips as she steadies you, chuckling at you. The skeleton bounces up and down on its elastic string as if it's mocking you. No one else screamed and now you feel oh so silly.

Larissa moves a hand up to your shoulder and it has the opposite effect than she had intended, You shoot away from her, yelling again.

“Babes, save your energy, rides just started,” Alice laughs.

You look at her weakly before you settle back down.

For the first minute or so you manage to contain yourself but the ride ups the ante and it's an onslaught of jumpscares and horrifyingly accurate props paired with the most wretched heart stopping music.

What takes the cake is when the models begin to interact, a mummified hand snaps out from the side to grab onto Marilyn’s shoulder, to which she laughs. She laughs.

It becomes too much, as more and more horror elements start leering into you, you begin to feel a horrible tightness in your chest, phantom hands clawing at your neck, wrapping around slowly. The music is too loud, the dim lighting is somehow too bright and you can hear everyone's breathing. Your clothes seem to be scratching against your skin despite feeling absolutely fine moments ago. A witch’s cackle sounds as cheap sparks are set off all around you. You flinch. Then a fog machine is set into motion, obscuring your sight as steam hisses. The world begins to rock as a cold sweat prickles all over your body.

With a sickening suddenness a grotesque, hyper-realistic cadaver drops down just ahead. A mechanic whirring is heard. It launches towards the cart. Hitting the front before it rises. You shriek in pure unadulterated terror, tearing up your throat as you launch yourself into Larissa’s lap, hiding your face with her shoulder. Your body trembles as she instinctively wraps her arms around you. Your breathing is erratic and she can even feel your heart thrashing against her chest. Your grip on her jacket is iron tight, your knuckles white. You feel stiff and unresponsive to the soothing circles she's rubbing against your back.

A series of plastic spiders suspended on string descend down, drawing the cart and brushing against everyone. Faintly you hear Marilyn and Alice giggle at it. But you tense, and the sensation of the spikey legs sets you over the edge. You press yourself even further into Larissa, as you choke back sobs. Over the music, they can't be heard, but Larissa can feel you jerk with each cry that forces itself out of you.

At this point Alice has caught on, she leans forward and looks between you and Larissa, a pointed look of concern on her face. But Larissa just quietly tells her she has it under control and for Alice to just enjoy the remainder of the ride.

Another cheap shock value scare, and just the noise has you screeching and curling into yourself more.

“Atikah?” She whispers softly into your ear, one hand stroking through your hair, her other arm now wrapped firmly around your waist. But it does little in grounding you.

You only whimper in response.

She feels guilty for not realising you were genuinely terrified.

After what feels like an eternity you finally break through another black curtain back into the outside world. The cart stops with a few groans, Alice and Marilyn watch you as Larissa tries to coax you off of her.

“Atikah, it’s over now,”

You move back marginally, letting the noises of the other rides filter back in, it still sounds overwhelming but the eerie music is no longer present.

Larissa eyes the other two, both varying degrees of worried, before leaning in close so she can't be heard, “You’re safe now, I promise,” her warm breath ghosts over your ear.

You take a shuddering breath and extricate yourself from Larissa’s lap, keeping your head down so your hair covers your face. The blonde still keeps a hand on your back as she watches you try calm yourself down with great effort.

Wordlessly you leave the cart and walk off to the side just out of view.

The remaining trio all exchange glances, and Alice is the first to leave, hopping over Marilyn. The other two hot on her heels.

By the time Alice had reached you, you had found a picnic bench and sat staring into the neighbouring forest, counting in your head as you took measured breaths. The tingling feeling in your hands had started to subside but you still shake.

“Hey,”

You don’t tear your gaze away from the trees. Barely registering Alice sitting next to you.

“What happened back there?” She noticed your eyes looking a little red and raw.

Your voice is weak and hoarse as you muster up the strength to speak, “Just, got too much in there, I think,”

Before Alice can reply Marilyn is heard from not too far away, “I’m so sorry Miss. Karnstein! I didn’t know- ”

“It’s fine.” You take a deep breath and wipe the dried tears off of your face, “I’m sorry for ruining it,” you laugh halfheartedly. Giving her a smile, or as much of a smile as you can.

“Don’t be ridiculous, are you okay now?” The English accent that graces your ears helps greatly as you finally begin to feel human again.

You nod slowly, still not making eye contact. It’s one catastrophe after another for you, now that you’ve regained yourself, you’re embarrassed.

“It was fun- ” you start.

“Bitch not for you,”

Alice shirks away at the look the Principal sends her.

You laugh, it's an airy laugh but it’s genuine and it dispels the tension, soon Marilyn’s joining you.

Alice hugs you tight, “I think Principal Weems has got it from here, we’ll leave you be,”

“Yeah, we’ll get out of your hair, enjoy the rest of your date,” Marilyn chirps before heading into the crowd, dragging Alice with her but not before she can send a shit eating grin your way.

You and Larissa are left in shock, both of your faces a delicious red, a charged silence between you. Neither of you look at eachother.

“Our what?” Larissa mutters into the air, head reeling at Marilyn’s cast away comment.

You don't respond immediately. Both of you had heard the botany teacher loud and clear.

“Is it… is it okay if we just sit here a little longer?” you ask meekly, peering up at her.

“We can stay here as long as you need, darling,” Larissa takes a seat next to you.

“Thank you.” You rest your head on her shoulder.

You’re not sure how long you sit with the blonde, at some point her arm has found its way around your body again. Another tether helping you banish the last of the nerves. She’s busy admiring the stars. As best she can with the light pollution. To you, the stars have nothing against Larissa.

Fireworks bloom in the sky, you can see their reflection in Larissa’s eyes. In that moment you sit up and press a kiss to the very corner of Larissa’s mouth.

AN - I have never cried at a film… I’ve almost cried. But I did cry at the notebook when I watched it aged 15. Also sorry for the downer in this chapter, but I thought it’d be fun to have our dear reader cling to Larissa 🤭

taglist - @weemssapphic @h-doodles @blessmysouljessisonaroll @eveymay @lvinhs @enchantressb @a-queen-and-her-throne

(pls lmk if I forgot to tag you and I’ll have you tagged in future updates, or if you’d like removed)

#larissa weems #larissa weems x reader

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dromexa · 10 months

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so i went to the ladies races day with the work girls yesterday, and while they were in the bathroom i started talking to this woman whose name i have completely forgotten cause honestly i’m still drunk now

now with ladies race days most of the women are dressed up to the absolute nines and this woman was serving absolute cunt, absolutely goregous which is probably how i started this conversation with her in the first place. she was really nice and we started chatting, she introduced me to her boyfriend (who i immedieatly told ‘you best treat her right you’re a lucky man’ lmao) anyway then the conversation has steered to ‘what do you do on a normal day when we’re not all dressed like we’re attending the yorkshire equivelent of the met gala’, and she said to me

‘you will never guess what i do for a living’

now, i’m not typically a serious person. i like to joke and laugh, and most of the time when someone says to me ‘you’ll never guess what happened’ i say things like; you’ve bought a farm and are going to adopt a bunch of dogs a la 101 dalmations, etc. but sometimes i take that question very seriously (like one time in third year of uni a friend of a friend at a party, who was a foreign student, said ‘you’ll never guess which country i’m from’ because literally nobody had ever guessed it in three years, and everyone said ‘nah she’ll never get it its impossible’ and after much consideration i said ‘vietnam’ bang on the money and got so many fucking free drinks that night good times)

so yesterday, i’m hammered already from the three bottles of presecco we drank in the hour long taxi ride to get here, so i’m very much in the ‘no filter’ stage, and not feeling particularly serious. i think the best answer to give right now is ‘scientist’ cause, hey, wouldn’t it be cool if there was a fucking particle physicist or some shit at the damn ladies race day.

but the bset part!!! SHE FUCKING WAS A SCIENTIST

not a particle physist, she works with chemical toxins or something BUT OH MY FUCKING GOD HER FACE IT UP and it made me SO FUCKING HAPPY CAUSE HOW MANY TIMES ALREADY HAVE PEOPLE BEEN SHOCKED THAT THIS GORGEOUS WOMAN IS A GOD FUCKING DAMN SCIENTIST, AND IS PROBABLY SMARTER THAN YOU?!?!

and not only that, but I was the one who said it! SHE WAS SO HAPPY THAT SOMEONE LOOKED AT HER AND THOUGHT ‘yeah she’s definitely a scientist’ !!!!!!!!!!idk it was just this genuine moment of human connection and even though i may never see her again, she is my bestie and i hope that she and her boyfriend and their three year old kid have a good happy life <3

#personal

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stateswscarlet · 6 months

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Hello Scarlet. I read all your twitter threads and watched Edward's videos and his series. Thank you so much for helping me understand law. At first I couldn't understand how would I surrender because in theory this seemed difficult i.e to enjoy imagination and not look at 3D. Then one day I decided to just do it for fun. First I changed the weather. Truly felt it to be done. The weather changed the very next hour or so. Then I decided that my bestie would go to UK for studies. She had no money, she'd cry everyday to me and I wanted nothing but best for her. To study abroad is her dream. I decided she's already in UK and she's studying in her desired uni. I would fullfill myself imagination and would tell her to have faith and tell her I have faith that she'll go to console her. The circumstances were too difficult because of her opposing siblings and zero funds.(she's orphan and we live with elders in my country) . Literally a week later she gave me good news that money came out of nowhere and she got her visa (it's difficult to get visa when you're from a certain notorious third world country lmao) and ticket and all this happened so fast. Literally one week ago she was crying that she may never go uk and now she's going in just two days?? I was relieved kinda surprised but something in me told me it already happened so I wasn't like jumping with happiness as I thought I would. Truth is it is way easier to apply than to read. In theory it seemed difficult like how I fullfill myself in imagination and not look at 3d but when I actually applied, it was way way way easier. Zero effort at all. Whenever I would think of her, I'd remind myself she's already in UK and imagined her messaging me. And felt it done. I now know what this "feel it to be done/true" actually means. It was as if I'm freed from the desire. So thank you so much for your work. Thank you! And I advise everyone to just put the phone down and apply it and take your advice of "surrender to imagination" because now I understand what you meant. Thank you for helping me understand this.

I hope I sent this to right place, I don't know how this Tumblr thing works.

love this! thank you for sharing!

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legobatman08 · 11 months

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listen the fuck up, i think (HOPE) all of yall are antifa on here, but for WHATEVER REASON, the only time y'all care about fascism is when it happens in countries you know a lot about. I'm tired of the only political shit discussed being America or some fucking western European country.

there's a very prominent neo-nazi party in georgia (WHICH MY CLASSMATE IS A PART OF????), with extreme conservative and puritan views. see the armbands and the flag in the back? that's the georgian neo-nazi symbol. don't ask me why the faces are blurred, my source for this is the nazi classmate himself, and he blurred it.

brief summary of how this sorry excuse of an organization formed: they broke into a nightclub because "DANCING IS SINFUL", destroyed the club obviously, beat up everyone who was there (girls, guys, university students, bartenders, EVERYONE). where was the police, you may ask? one of them was drunk and JOINED these shitheads, the rest showed up hours later for "unrelated reasons" and pretended none of it happened. you'll see that cops doing jack shit will become a reoccurring theme in this post. this all branches from the extreme upholding of "orthodox christian values" - they're doing all this in "God's name", AND THE CHURCH SUPPORTS IT. obviously, fascism in Georgia existed even before these fucking cunts, but they're growing stronger and recruiting more people these days.

SO, WHAT PROMPTED ME TO MAKE THIS POST? these days, they've gotten more physically aggressive. here are some examples:

they asked a random guy in the streets about his opinion on fascism, when he said he doesn't like it (FUCKING OBVIOUSLY), they beat him up (the police did JACK SHIT and pretended that the part security cameras glitched out WHEN THE NAZIS LITERALLY FILMED A VIDEO OF THEM DOING IT)

they killed a dog and kept beating it after death, and they beat up cats in the street (they filmed these as a video too)

they beat up the leader of a governmental organization Girchi, which is the most progressive party we have right now (with anti-governmental, anti-russian, and antifa anarchistic ideologies)

the Girchi leader was supposed to hold a lecture about politics for kids and uni students at a summer camp thing, and the nazis ATTACKED THE CAMPSITE AND THREW STONES AT PEOPLE.

update on the first one: an armed man in civilian clothes entered his HOSPITAL ROOM, some women tried to stop him, TURNS OUT HE WAS A COP, AND NOW THE POLICE IS PRESSING CHARGES FOR "ATTACKING A POLICE OFFICER"??????

1 - They didn't know he was a cop, 2 - they didn't even attack him just tried to stop him from going to the kid's bed because he was a threat, 3 - HOW THE FUCK ELSE WOULD YOU REACT IF A STRANGER WITH A GUN ENTERED YOUR KID'S HOSPITAL ROOM AND TRIED TO GO NEAR HIM?????

anyways, this shit is scary. the nazi party is recruiting minors, like my classmate, so that if they ever get arrested, the minors will have to be released because OBVIOUSLY nobody's gonna HAVE A 14 YEAR OLD ROT IN PRISON. even if they were all adults, as i mentioned, the police don't care, because they're doing this in the name of Christianity. they're posting xenophobic, homophobic, conservative and very christian nazi bullshit so that they can make people believe that they want what's best for people, BECAUSE THEY KNOW THAT THE MAJORITY OF GEORGIA SHARES THOSE IDEOLOGIES. their name is literally "Geo National Unity" TO MAKE IT SEEM LIKE THEY'RE DOING THIS TO "HELP" US. EVEN IF THEIR IDEAS WERE MORALLY CORRECT, WHY THE FUCK AREN'T THEY BEHIND BARS FOR WHAT THEY'RE DOING??

i know I'm not the most coherent source of information, i know this just looks like a stupid rant, but this information isn't accessible in English, which means NOBODY OTHER THAN US GEORGIANS KNOWS WHATS GOING ON. the later this shit stops, the more fascists there'll be in Georgia, because no one wants to put a stop to this. cops are fucking pigs, as always.

I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF THIS. I'M TIRED OF SEEING SWASTIKA GRAFFITI ON WALLS AND SCHOOL DESKS. I'M SICK OF FEELING THREATENED JUST BECAUSE I'M OPENLY ANTI-NAZI AND SOMEWHAT OPENLY QUEER. I'M SICK OF RELIGION BEING AN EXCUSE FOR THESE FUCKING DEGENERATES. NOBODYS DOING ANYTHING ABOUT IT. I'm sorry for getting fucking emotional on a post that's supposed to be informational, but SOMEONE had to fucking say it. progressive people in non-western countries are in fucking hell, because nobody acknowledges any problems in places that doesn't concern them. anyways please fucking reblog this, for awareness and for help and what-fucking-ever. thank you for reading.

#acab #geo national unity #neo nazis #antifa #let me know what other tags i can use for this so people actually fucking see it #georgian politics

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umepnnn · 3 months

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3DOLC x ROE — results.

challenge created by @starliet and @cleostoohot 🖤

sorry (and not sorry) for the long hiatus cuz i'm enjoying life :)

so a few days ago i came across several posts about their challenge and i decided to try it out ! i didn't plan to post or anything so there wasn't a "what i'll be manifesting" post, but the results were so insane i had too make one.

ଓ affirmations i used:

regardless of everything...

nothing can ruin my manifestations

i always manifest within 3 days or less

i have everything i desire

ଓ what i manifested:

always confident and friendly, good at socializing

that's exactly what i did. i feel like a social butterfly at school and it's easier for me to join in convos now. making friends and having small talk just became easier for me. and i don't overthink so much anymore

being more included in my friend groups

i have a group i hang out with at uni for like 4-5 months now but i wasn't rlly active until this challenge LMAO now i'm like so comfortable with everyone and felt more like a part of the group. it also went like this with my other friend groups that i just started hanging out since this year. i actually speak to people individually now woah :)

getting closer with an SP

idk i thought this guy was cute so i just included this and at first the situation was: he's close with my friends but he's not in any of my friend groups so we don't hang much at all. but then after 2-3 days since this challenge, our mutual friend suddenly ADDED HIM into the group out of the blue and we all started going out and he is SUCH A GENTLEMAN to me + he added my socials as well hehe

school is fun, assignments are easy & no stress

literally came to school to chit chat and i'm not stressed at all. i get my work done on time and everything goes so smooth fr. and the best part is my classmates are the sweetest ugh SCHOOL IS FUN (they are the uni friend group i just mentioned up there) and they'd always gather around my seat lol and we'd chat the whole class.

bright smooth clear skin

same skin care routine – skin clearer than ever. no longer uneven dark spots or small little bumps <3 smooth like a baby's bottom :) my mom actually thought i was wearing makeup when i literally just washed my face n removed all the makeup !!

no dark circles

i slept like usual but my dark circles rlly went away since this challenge i'm actually surprised (even tho it should go away cuz it's the law lmao) and usually they'd still show when i have my makeup on but now it's wayyy less noticeable

friends from other countries coming to mine so we could hang out

just went out with one the other day lmao so check ✔️ i guess

everyone cares about me and is very nice to me

yoo my friends were so patient and attentive to me and even the taxi drivers are nice, they'd start convos and not in a creepy way. everyone is so nice for real <333

ଓ what i did:

i just read the list and affirm whenever i can, mostly focused on the 4D and know it's inevitable that they'd manifest <3 cuz it's already mine the moment i think i have it. and honestly the "nothing can ruin my manifestations" line helped me a lot.

other than that i did nothing in the 3D. i never initiated anything. they all just came to me just ✨ like ✨ that ✨

i got most of my desires within 3 days but i still continued affirming after 3 days cuz like why not? it's like i'm doing the challenge again or sum but yes i still get desired results after that.

btw i also listened to quite a few subliminals alongside doing this challenge just because i can xD even for the same desires and like they both manifested but anyways i'll make a separate post on my subliminal results.

[note from a later date //29 jan 2024]

i have been on a hiatus since then until now, because i was busy with a lot of stuff i didn't have much time to learn and post astrology stuff here ~

i am still busy as ever and i don't plan on coming back here anytime soon (mayyyybee idk) but i still come on tumblr quite often cuz i loveee our astrology & manifesting content

and somehow today i checked my draft and saw this whole post here from three years ago i'm like wuhhh totally forgot.

BUT! everything i said is true fr like the "friends from other countries coming to mine so we could hang out" last year literally TEN of my friends came to my place (they're from 4 different countries) and I even went on trips with some of them — mind u i havnt seen most of them in like 2 years at the time

trust me manifesting is sooo easy just think u have it and u have it

thanks for reading and stay healthy stay safe everyone <3 cya

#manifest #spirituality #law of assumption #loa success #loablr #loassumption #loa blog #manifesting

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chaotic-archaeologist · 9 months

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I'll be on my first dig this coming August (whoop whoop). Aside from the general tips (sun cream, good shoes, clothes for the weather), what are some suggestions you have? (Anything from how to deal with 20+ random people from my uni course who I don't know, being a trans man in the UK heat and figuring out how to dress and deciding whether I should actually try to care about hiding my chest/sports bra straps (if I wear tank tops), what to pack for lunch, etc.) Our dig organiser has literally told us nothing except the dates and times we'll be working, so I am going a little bit insane with trying to plan logistics for myself. (Also having a fun time trying to find steel-toed boots and a new rain jacket....) Sorry for the long ask, I hope you have a lovely day!

Hey there, dirtling! Congratulations on going on your first dig! The good news is that I think I've answered all of your questions before, and you can find those posts on my advice master list. But I'll also take the time to go into more detail about some precautions for trans archaeologists.

Passing: listen, I'm a firm believer that passing is not the end all/be all of trans experience. Some people really really want to pass. Some people don't. That's totally fine. However, in certain settings, passing can be a safety issue—particularly if you're going to a country/area which is less LGBTQ+ friendly. The choice on whether to conceal your methods of binding is entirely yours.

In general, I've found archaeologists to be very accepting, but I would consider keeping things on the DL for a week or so while you get a read on the group and then proceed from there. Is it shitty that you have to worry about that? Yes. Is it a precaution that could help keep you safe/minimize uncomfortable interactions? Also yes. Do what feels best to you.

Binding on a dig: binding is going to put you at higher risk for heat exhaustion and heatstroke. This is a serious concern, and you should do everything you can to minimize the danger. You don't have to tell your supervisor why, but I would recommend letting them know you're sensitive to heat and may need to take breaks to cool off. Heatstroke is one of the biggest occupational hazards for archaeologists, and it shouldn't be taken lightly.

You can also set yourself up for success by getting clothes that will help keep you cool (provided you can afford to do so). I have two pairs of REI's Trailmade Pants, which are expensive but totally worth it. They're incredibly comfortable and breathable, and they've held up to repeated wear and tear. (They also come in a lot of different waist/inseam measurements which is handy for trans guys.) But you cal also totally go to a local sporting/outdoor store and find something similar. Do this for shirts too. Find things that are breathable and that won't trap heat.

Figure out how you're going to wash whatever it is you're using to bind. You are going to sweat. You are going to get gross. You do not want the skin irritation that will come from wearing a dirty binder all the time. Again, if you can afford it, look into getting multiples of your preferred binder so you don't have to worry about doing laundry all the time.

Be aware of the physical limitations that come with binding. This is applicable to any kind of physical exertion, excavation included. Make sure you're taking breaks to breathe properly.

Medications: if you're on HRT, make sure that 1) you have the supply you will need, and 2) have a safe place to administer those medications. Depending on the field school, you could be camping or living in some sort of nearby accommodation. If your HRT requires an injection, scope out a sanitary place to do so. If you need your supervisor's help in ensuring privacy while you do your injection, you don't need to tell them what the injection is for (if you don't want to).

Group dynamics: (this has nothing to do with being trans) being tossed into a group of people that you don't know is always intimidating. But remember, everyone is probably feeling the same way, to varying degrees. Go into things with an open mind and find the people you gravitate towards. There's always going to be someone you don't like on a field crew, and there's nothing you can do about it. Just try to keep contact with that person to a minimum.

Keep your trowel sharp and your heart hopeful, -Reid

#he speaks #archaeology #archaeology advice #trans archaeologist

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toomuchracket · 1 year

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I looooove all of your Ross talk🫶🏻 I’m a sucker for best friends to lovers so imagine being best friends since idk maybe 13 and finally once you’re older realizing/telling each other that you have feelings for one another❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹😭😭😭

oh god yeah like maybe it's one of those situations where you live next door to each other your whole lives, so the two of you walk to and from school together every day and become quite close, and then ross drives you when he passes his test. and i really do think it's mostly a platonic love you have for each other at the start - like obviously he's cute and you're cute and you're both sweet and you get on really well, but the penny doesn't really drop for you romantically until you're about eighteen and at a party.

the band (whatever iteration they are at that point) have played, you're all a bit drunk, someone suggests spin the bottle, and you're all like this is a great idea let's do it. and then ross has a go and it lands on you and you're both a bit like "oh dear haha" but you think nothing of it, and then you kiss and it's just an oh moment for you. like, it's a good kiss. you want it to happen again as soon as your lips pull apart. and there's a softness in ross' eyes when he looks at you afterwards that you've never seen, but it gives you butterflies. and he's the same - kissed you and thought "shit, why did i never do this sooner?", then fell head over heels at the way your cheeks went pink and you smiled at him afterwards. but you both know that a relationship isn't ideal right now - the band are seriously working to get a record deal and break into the industry, and you're going off to uni somewhere else in the country - so you just never mention that you like each other. and you stay in touch over the years - you go to the shows that you can when the boys get bigger, which gets harder as you graduate and start working, and ross isn't always home for christmas for very long, so there's some years you don't get a chance to catch up at all. and you both see other people, but never anything serious, and you both get a little rush of butterflies whenever you see the other has posted on social media. and then maybe in like 2018, one of your friends from school gets married, and you're talking to your old friend group online before it - all of the boys are invited and going, and you're so so excited to see all of them, especially ross. and the day comes, you go by yourself because you're not seeing anyone, but you're feeling good. and you've been in the venue for literally less than five seconds when you hear a familiar voice go "oh, there she is!", and you just turn to see ross looking suave and fly and sexy in his suit (and it's 2018, so he's really tanned and his hair is short) and you're internally like "ooooooooh my fucking god". and you run over to him as fast as your heels will allow and just hug him (you kind of lose it at how huge he is because its been so long since you hugged him. like, he's a man now) and you're like "god you look so good how are you?" and ross pulls back and twirls you round and says "i look good? you look amazing. it's so good to see you". and you're both a bit giddy chatting for a bit, before ross takes you to see the other boys and say hi - they're also very excited to see you, and it's good to catch up. and you end up sitting next to ross during the ceremony, and at the meal too, because he also didn't bring a plus one. and you're having such a a good time chatting with ross - it's just like old times, you and your best friend, but you can't get over how fucking sexy he is, so you're deliberately flirting with him just to see what happens. and he plays into it! whispers in your ear that he can't get over how gorgeous you look, absent-mindedly puts his hand on your thigh, drags you up to dance with him to this must be the place by talking heads (his fave song apparently!). and it's not a slow dance per se, but you're holding hands and bopping and you're trying not to think about how familiar and safe you feel with ross (which is NOT helped by the song lyrics AT ALL), and then he hugs you close and you just sway along to the music. and then when he pulls away from you, he has the same look on his face as he did when you kissed him that night all those years ago and then he's like "let's get a drink". and you do - he pays - and then you take your drinks outside. and it's quiet, just the two of you on this loveseat, and ross is like "you're not seeing anyone at the minute, are you?" and you say no and he's like "neither am i. that's good". and then he kisses you! and that's it - the start of you guys being together <3

#mads answers asks #mads muses #fluff asks #ross asks

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tcookies777 · 1 year

Text

Why I did not release TAOL Chapter 42

Hi all, you may be wondering where is Chapter 42 for The Anatomy of Love. Well, I got a funny story to tell y'all with both good news and bad news...

So, as some of you may know, I am a registered nurse with a Bachelors of Science. However, when I first started college, I bounced between Nursing and English because both were my passion. For practicality, I completed my nursing to make that bank 💸💸💸 But last year, on a whim and thanks to the encouragement of friends and family who recognized my passion in the art of literature, I applied to college again to finish my English degree as well.

Well, I honestly didn't think much would come out of it because these were ivy league level schools that I applied to more as just a joke to myself because I didn't think I had what it took to get in (I consider myself a pretty average student).

Turns out your girl got accepted to the number 1 English program in her country!! 🥳🎉🎉 Yep, I'm returning to college to finish my English degree this coming Fall! I'm super excited but super scared because the university is renowned for its world class academia, rigor, and competitiveness but also I'm so ecstatic to be able to pursue my passion like this!

Ok here's where the story really starts.

So I traveled to the university's city to scout the campus, tour around the classrooms and sit in lectures to get a feel of the whole vibe. I also was looking for apartments to rent for the school semester and, well, unfortunately the city is a high crime area so...

As I was in the middle of touring, I ended up facing a robber at gunpoint (that's 'Murica for you). Miraculously, my dumb ass managed to escape unharmed because the idiot had the safety on and I had pepper gel (sadly he was not caught).

BUT! A few days after that, while still touring the city, I ended up facing another robber but this time at knifepoint. This time I suffered some minor injuries and a minced purse 🥹 but thankfully nothing was stolen (except for my phone but I was able to recover it just fine).

So I went to the hospital for some stitches and went on my dandy way.

Then 2 weeks ago - yes, the same weekend I updated Chapter 41 - my friend asked me to go rock climbing with her on Sunday afternoon (literally right after I posted the chapter).

I weight lift regularly at the gym and run a few miles a week, so my dumb ass thought that despite my minor injuries, I would be just fine rock climbing.

Well, my dumb ass severely underestimated just how much rock climbing requires you to engage all the muscles of your body, from your ankles and toes all the way to your wrists and finger tips.

As you probably guessed by now, yes, my dumb ass tore my stitches and at the moment I am still in a world of pain.

Because it's painful to hunch over the computer for long periods of time, I've had to give myself another break. So I want to take the next weeks or so taking my proper rest and completing my rehab so that I'll be in tip top shape to start university (or finish Uni I guess?) when Fall semester starts.

So sorry for the inconvenience! I will do my best to get Chapter 42 out as soon as I feel better!

#a cookie speaks

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sugaroto · 11 months

Text

Panelele* story time

*Panhellenic exams, aka will define whether I go into uni or not

Day 1: Essay, aka greek

Our theme was feminism and women's rights. I think i did ok? Tho I finished like an hour earlier and then started panicking cause I finished earlier and didn't dare to leave the classroom. I literally checked everything like 15 times and even counted my words on theme Γ and Δ (Γ =literature exercise, Δ=essay) and then I panicked again cause I was -20 words on the essay

A good thing is that the day before I was reading some old essays of mine and I happened to read one I had written about human rights (this was probably the best one I've ever written since I got 25/30) and I remembered 2 paragraphs I had about women and wrote everything on my essay, tho it was a little messier of course but at least I had the ideas ready?

One thing the whole school agreed on is that once we got out we all laughed on [that one guy] (misogynist, racist, homophobic etc kinda guy) that probably failed

Most of us dislike him and once we got out we were like "GUYS. HIM" And then laughed about it. Sorry not sorry. He wants to be a politician, I hope he wont succeed. The country is already bad as it is

Also, a lot of people (online) were commenting on Text 2, cause "I was so glad when I saw feminism was the theme, but once I read text 2 I was dissapointed to see it still misogyny"

Which yeah, I get where they're coming from, the author was like "new feminism is bad and likes victim-culture, classic old feminism is good" and... also the description said something about identity of genders which sounded very queer to me so I thought the author might originally be attacking trans people but the actual text did not mention trans people

Also. None of that matters. Yeah the text was bullshit, was my job to listen to it? No my job was to find what gave away that the author was using comparison on the second paragraph. I literally had to find the words "on the contrary" and "but" (αντιθέτως, όμως) and say why they meant comparison

I was so focused on that that when I noticed something was weird with the text I just went like "Huh... weird ....*circles*ΑΝΤΙΘΈΤΩΣ"

Also, the whole point is to keep it neutral and not be controversial, I could write that all women are witches that should be burn if it was my opinion but if I wrote it reasonably and fair enough it'd still be acceptable

Probably the most controversial in my essay was the mention of "hijab" which I tried to be very neutral about

Day 2: ancient greek

2 parts, γνωστό & άγνωστο aka (known & unknown)

Known: what we have been taught in class, texts from ancient dudes we have to know the meaning about

Unknown: text we've never seen before in our lives but we're supposed to know enough grammar and translate it ourselves and answer questions about grammar

Known: absolute bullshit. Aristotle. Fuck you Aristotle. We were sure we'd have the text about Alexander, but no it had to be Aristotle's town. I didn't know shot I messed up on that part

Unknown: disaster. The text was some dude whining to Socrates cause his son wanted a σοφιστη teacher, the grammar ruined me. I wrote σχε, the right was σχες, I wrote αγενου, the right was αγενους, I wrote ραον/ραδιον, the right was ραδιον/ραον. I was crying two days about it. The whole word is considered wrong. I get nothing for the effort of trying to figure out that έχειν becomes σχε(ς) in β' πρόσωπο προστακτικής αορίστου β or something and also that is a fucking ανώμαλο

Also. They were this close 🤏 to fail me, cancel me before we were even given the exam

Cause, in order to do all that grammar shit, we need to make a draft

So since we had to be in the room for the next 50 minutes or something waiting, I started making a draft of some very basic nouns and verbs bc knowing me I'd forget everything once I was given the exam

And im like "sorry is it OK I wrote with a pencil?"

"YOU WROTE? THIS CAN GET YOU CANCELED ITS CONSIDERED CHEATING" *αντιγραφή as in "copying" as if I have the answers next to me and I'm copying them

And im like "I didn't copy them," I literally just wrote them and birthed the thoughts out of my fucking mind what the fuck is the difference if I do it now or in 30 minutes

And im like should I erase it? It's pencil I'm not cheating I literally JUST ANAPNOH GAMOTO OLOI OI MALAKES EPITORITES SE MENA

And they call some other teachers and I guess who was supposed to be the boss was like "nah keep it who cares its ok"

And then, when I was done with the exam, cause I had shitted my pants cause of that, I started erasing the draft just in case AND THE MOMENT I DID this freaking bitch gets up and goes and talks to the the other teacher while looking at me and then they call the boss again and I hear him whispering "it's ok"(δεν πειράζει)

But I was so sure they would cancel me the moment I got up so I sat there for like 30 minutes in fear that if I got up they'd tell me "sorry you failed cause you erased the draft we let you keep"

Day 3: latin

We're given the exam right?

I start writing

The teacher brings her chair next to my desk and rests her hand on my desk

(THE PAIN OF HAVING TO SEAT ON THE FRONT FUCKING DESK)

Ok... maybe she wants to do her job which is to keep an eye on students. She's not bothering me yet

She grabs my ID card (we were given those in order to participate) and reads it...

Ok...

She lets it down

She grabs my sharpener and looks at it, she lets it down

Why. The. Fuck. Is. She. Touching. My. Things.

She gets bored and starts drumming her fingers on the desk. I give her a death stare( and so does my friend on the other desk) but look back down as soon as she looks back at me

She SPEAKS TO ME "Είναι πολλά τα θέματα;" (does the exam has a lot of parts?)

Considering they almost failed me the other day (different people) and im not allowed to... like have a chit chat- like this is a serious exam there's seriously a police officer outside- I don't know what to do I just shrugged at her

"Ok let me see then" AND SHE GRABS THE EXAM FROM MY HANDS WHILE I WAS FUCKING WRITING TO "SEE" AND IM LIKE "πρέπει να γραψω"(I have to write) and SHES LIKE OH YEAH RIGHT AND GIVES IT BACK

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

I THINK THATS ILLEGAL AND I FELT ASSAULTED

THIS IS LIKE THE MOST IMPORTANT EXAM IN MY LIFE SO FAR AND SHE HAS THE AUDACITY TO BOTHER ME CAUSE SHES BORED

YOU CANT JUST GRAB MY EXAMS LIKE THAT

ALSO IT WAS DEAD SILENCE IN THERE UNTIL I SPOKE "I HAVE TO WRITE" AND PEOPLE LOOKED AT ME BUT THE ONES THAT WERE CLOSE HAD PICKED UP ON THE FACT THAT THERE WAS SOMETHING FUCKING WRONG WITH HER

My friend who I'm together in tutoring class and was sitting on the other side of the classroom was like was that sugar? But she didn't dare to look up or speak bc she understood something was off

WHAT the actual fuck

Do they check the teachers before they bring them in? Wtfwtfwtfwtfwtwtf

I couldn't focus after that

Thankfully Latin is my fave class and the texts we had to translate were easy

But holy fucking shit

And I did do a mistake on the translation cause I wrote "αναδεικνύει" instead of "ανταποκρίνοταν" so I later when I was checking my answers I asked where I had to write the right word bc there was no space so I needed to leave a note and she was like "I don't think we can answer now that everyone has left" (we were only 3 students in the class by then) WELL MAYBE I WOULDN'T HAVE MADE A MISTAKE IF SOMEONE DIDN'T GRAB MY EXAMS WHILE I WAS TRANSLATING

Day 4: History

History is my worst class. The teachers were normal. Nobody tried to fail me before I was given the exams.

I didn't have high hopes for history because I've never gotten a good grade but my tutor believes I was lucky enough cause everything that was on the exam was something I liked and knew(according to her, according to me I hate it all)

The good news is that on the first πηγή* my answer was very big, first time that happens I always fail on my πηγές

Also there was a question about what the first government of Crete did and I had no idea what the first government of Crete even was but I remember there was a list of 12 things that were done in Crete so I just wrote that cause it was the only thing I knew

Turns out that was the right answer, I found it out by pure luck

Also turns out there were 9 things, but in the end I had only found 5 so ok

*πηγή they give us a bunch of texts and we have to write "according to the text and then according to what I know *answers questions*"

Day 5: I still have English on Saturday and idk what will happen. That was a choice exam

#sugarenia school stuff #probably the last time i use that tag🥲?#panhellenic #Panhellenic exams #panelele #panelele 2023 #Panhellenic exams 2023 #πανελληνιες #Πανελελε #πανελλήνιες 2023 #sugarenia talks #sugarenia thoughts

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rose-henry · 10 months

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stressed+excited+happy+nervous+restless but mostly excited. it’s been a chaotic few days but I’m ready and at peace with this 7 month journey in front of me. feeling so so privileged to be able to live my life like this and witness whatever I’m about to witness :)

today april made brekkie for us!! challah french toast, maple butter and coffees at 8am 😍 bless her soul for getting up and doing this on the first day on school holidays

then maddy was the best person in the world as usual and helped me organise my life by printing all my important travel documents for me and then helping me pack all my last things and clean my whole room to be the guest room in the house (!) alex came over and we had pesto pasta and finished the packing and cleaning and they made me so calm 🥰

then I had a little mandatory in person exchange pre-departure session at uni until 4:15 (getting ready to leave the house at 6pm to go to the airport) and I had a rapid 30 minutes at home before our last family dinner. I had a breakdown and cried in my room (for one last time) about leaving everything behind for so long but then I realised how lucky I am and I still wouldn’t change my travel plans if I could… I’m content with my plans and there was no need to cry! so silly…

at the airport thien starting calling and texting me and he was stuck in tahiti and there was all this drama so there was a possibility that they wouldn’t let him into the US!!! as if his 24+ hour delay on the trip to LA could get worse. long story short we ended up sitting outside the departure gate, with my parents and april still, all on the phone to thien and researching and helping him. he needed my parents cause they know more than anyone else he knows about USA visas and fuckery. in the end he had to book a return flight (which we hadn’t booked yet) from LA for the end of jan (the date of which we hadn’t decided yet, now it’s decided for us) in tahiti on his layover where he was never supposed to be in the first place. he’s now flying from tahiti to LA and doesn’t know if they’ll actually let him into the country so I’m now just stressed about thien and completely fine for my whole trip. literally fuck america and their government and immigration laws. no one ever move there please.

after all that fuckery I returned to my family and said our proper goodbyes, they felt rushed and not right at all but they had to be done and it’s all okay now. I cried a bit through the security line after leaving them, I kept turning back around as I was walking away to see them and they stayed forever still waving and smiling, until once I turned around and they weren’t there anymore :(

anyway…. after all of that I am finally resting and at peace at gate 7. it’s 8:25pm and boarding is at 8:35! I’m so excited for singapore airport and my ultimate deli sandwich that I made for myself at my last day of work at the market yesterday.

bye melbourne 👋

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potato-jem · 1 year

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hello nero my beloved soulmate!! <33

i’m back and i am already suffering from severe PHD (post holiday depression, i decided it is a thing). my friend left last night and i hate this. it’s so unfair that we live in two different countries and we can’t see each other as much as we would like to. i’ll probably see her soon, i should have another week off in august and we were talking about me visiting her this time so hopefully i’ll be able to go.

anyway, on to the trip!! it was so cool!! i mean the first week we stayed in tuscany, we went around florence and a few other cities around here, and we got tattoos!!! i told you about this already but they are so cute!!! our little irish dinosaurs (they’re irish because we met in ireland <3 they’re named saoirse and niamh).

then for the second week we went to rome!! oh it was so nice!! we found the perfect weather. it was always sunny and warm enough to go around in shorts, but never too hot not to be able to explore. we went for the usual places: the colosseum, the pantheon, the squares and fountains, all that. but also we accidentally found ourselves into the roman forums and they were amazing!! i’d never been in them, only seen them from above, but they are so big, you can see a whole city. but the highlight was ostia antica. it was this archeological site near rome and it’s so quiet because not may people know it. it’s an 84 acres site where you can literally walk into houses and shops and temples and theaters from the roman period. and it’s amazing because usually rome is very protected, like there are fences and barriers everywhere, you can’t get too close to a lot of stuff, but in ostia antica we could literally touch the ruins, walk through them and find our way back in a maze of doors and corridors. it was so cool!!! also that’s where i found the cats!! they were so cute and friendly 🥺

last thing before i close this letter. the food!!! oh the food. we found this little restaurant on the very first night, which was actually so close to the trevi fountain, and it was so cheap and good (very rare combination to find in the middle of rome). they had some of the best spaghetti i’ve ever tried. also we kept going back there in the next days so they recognized us and they were so nice because they offered us appetizers and wine and they always remembered that we liked to order three plates of pasta to share between the two of us. they were so nice!!

i really needed this trip. i needed to be off work for a few weeks and just disconnect from all the drama and stress. and the good food and wine helped a lot with that lol. but seriously i’m so happy, it was an amazing trip and it was so good to see my friend again after so long <3

but enough about me now!! how are you doing nero?? what have you been doing these last two weeks??

also, about our last letter, i am very happy that you are following my orders and planning a very relaxing trip :) you deserve to not even think about uni when you’re on a trip. and it’s gonna be so fun to dance to that kind of music!! can’t wait to hear all about that one!!

and i’m very happy you’re obsessed with me getting tattoos because this is turning into a sickness. i can’t stop now :’)

but here are my other two tatts!!! the little rainbow one is very simple but very personal. i’ve been waiting forever to get it and it looks perfect 🥺 (yayyy you can start booking stuff!!! that means tattoos coming soon!!!)

i’m enclosing a hug and a really big plate of cacio e pepe (a kind of spaghetti with cheese and black pepper) just because one can never have too much pasta <3333

hi cece my beloved soulmate!!!!

i believe phd (post holiday depression) is a thing, i get it every time. it’s sad that your friend has gone home, but think about august!!! that should be so fun!!!

i’ve seen pictures of tuscany and it’s so beautiful!! and yes tattoos!! the fact that they are irish dinosaurs named saoirse and niamh because you met in ireland is the cutest story behind a matching tattoo ever 🥺🥺

oh rome!!!! that weather sounds lovely, i’m glad it was around for the entire trip!! sounds like you got up to quite a lot!! i’m literally imagining you walking around and pointing out these little tourist attractions 🥺 but ostia antica sounds so beautiful. a whole 84 acres to explore and experience the ancient roman life?? i would go crazy in there, especially with all the cats!!

oh the food sounds incredible!!! it’s so amazing you found something good and cheap!!! but those people sound so nice 🥹🥹 i’m glad they also added to such a wonderful break you had! i feel like pasta now…

you definitely needed that trip!! just a refresh is sometimes all you need, and good food and wine are recommended to help relax by doctors actually 😌😌😌 but i’m so happy you got to see your friend after so long and i’m so glad that you enjoyed yourself!!!!

i’ve been doing alright!! i had my trip to sydney and my twice concert, and it was so much more fun than i thought it would be!!! so i took my best friend and a family friend of mine, and my manager from work came too, but we all booked our concert tickets together so it was me and my friends, my manager and her brother and his partner. (don’t even ask me how stressful buying six tickets was)

the japanese place opened up again, and we were staying somewhere even closer to it. we basically walked everywhere, because the train station is in the shopping centre next to the japanese place, and that was only ten minutes away. so i took my friends to eat more ramen than we could see and we shared a bottle of soju (my friends are lightweights and it was VERY funny to watch. i had to finish the bottle off though)

and then we did lots of activities on the tuesday before the concert and we went to that album shop and book shop again and i spent way too much money, cece’s orders 😌😌 i spent so much money in the album shop they gave me a free album and preorder benefit photocards (which are really rare!!) and i had to show my id in the book store because i bought a level one restricted novel (actually banned in my state, but my professors made me too curious), which was quite funny

the twice concert was so fun, literally everyone in the audience were dancing and singing, and i was gay panicking and it was wonderful! each of the members of twice also had a solo performance and they did so well! one of them, momo, had this dance where she HAD A POLE?!?!? AND SHE HAD NEVER POLE DANCED BEFORE?? she was so good, i will save your eardrums by not sending the video i took 😌

anyways, here’s the photo they posted at the end!! we are in the centre and slightly to the right <3 (i’m sure you’ll see me 😂😂)

and then we actually got the chance to go to the harbour bridge and the opera house, which are in the same place, so we didn’t waste too much time there! and then we went to this room of claw machines near the eateries and i managed to win two things!! (one of them i spent way too much money to grab out, but he looked so lonely and i had to get my son out 😭😭) and then we had gelato mochi, which my friend found. so they get a scoop of ice cream and wrap it with mochi! we all got two, because none of us can make a decision and it really was a good end to the trip 🥺

other than that, i am running a little behind on uni, but i decided to use some of my leave and take the week off work. i’m just going to smash out the essays i have due (and overdue) and i’ll probably be able to rest better during the big exam session 😌

i’ve been looking forward to seeing these two and you didn’t disappoint! the rainbow one is adorable and the font for the script on your ribs is beautiful!!! i think i might be addicted to your tattoo addiction 😂 (yay!!! i’m so excited!!)

i really wanted this cacio e pepe, all this talking of food made me hungry! i’m squeezing you back real tight and i’m giving you a bowl of ramen <3333333

#nero attempts to socialise #cece my beloved!!!#<3333333333

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