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#i figure these snips are more likely to be his own
shipofthesis · 5 months
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Curiosity got the better of me and I watched James Somerton's Revolutionary Girl Utena analysis video. I ended up transcribing some of it to better follow some of what's said, so putting some of those snippets here. Placing these specifically because it paints a real bleak picture of how this man views abuse survivors. (For a more thorough debunking/clarifying commentary on the vid, this post's pretty good!)
14:16 Looking at real-world parallels, a given individual can endure much less debilitating physical and psychological trauma and be ruled as unfit by the state to make their own decisions. There are a number of other hints and instances in the plot, that strongly indicate that Anthy's willpower is so eroded that she has no sense of self-preservation whatsoever and is emotionally stunted to the point where she needs people to make decisions for her because she does not know how to think for herself. Something that Utena has been trying to get her to realize about herself this whole time.
Citing conservatorships as a supporting argument is wild. Ah yes, in real life mentally ill/disabled people can lose their rights!
39:30 People generally feel good when they are reassured of their Self existing in the world. When you are told that your self is to be a victim over time, your brain can cross those wires. Suddenly victimhood feels good, because you get that positive reassurance dopamine hit.
Very strange way to frame this. Wires cross, dopamine hits... how about actually talking about psychology and coping mechanisms?
51:42 That yes [Utena] somehow did manage to use the power of revolution and she used it in an impossible, selfless way. She liberated her best friend from a toxic power dynamic she had with her family. And for those who know, getting someone to abandon a toxic family environment, even if it is emotionally and psychologically damaging, is next to impossible. Many people who try to separate a friend from a toxic family end up having to abandon their friendship to protect their own mental health. Through a not-so-allegorical reading, we can say Utena did the same. That ultimately in spite of her bravado and nobility, she had to throw in the towel.
This is at the end of the video and is presumably a personal anecdote/observation by Mr. Somerton. When I got to this part his reductive view of Anthy made a lot more sense, it almost feels like he's trying to absolve himself.
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throneofsapphics · 7 months
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the ebb and flow of fate
Cazriel x f!Reader (Mor’s sister)
(part two) (part three) (part four) (part five) (epilogue)
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Summary: “Did you piss her off?” He leaned back, mouth curving into a smirk. The smirk quickly disappeared when Rhys explained what happened. 
“Tell her she can come on her own feet, or over my shoulder.” 
Word Count: ~6.2k
Warnings: eventual smut in later chapters, sexual assault, harassment, stalking, nightmares, light smut-ish (m/m, briefly described), light angst, liberal use of bargains, minors dni!
A/N: this was written for day 20 of my kink/angst-tober prompts but, my patience is limited and I needed to get this out of into the world and out of my brain for a bit. part 2 will be posted 10/20.
Something in her had been … off, ever since she visited a friend in the Autumn Court. Of course, they had all heavily protested her choice, but she’d been a friend of hers for years, and she firmly held her ground - insisting everything would be fine and that they didn’t know of her relation to them. 
It was driving all of them to the verge of insanity trying to figure out exactly what happened. Rhys gently probed against her mind once, and was immediately shut out - the walls going up like impenetrable iron gates, and a litany of creative curses were shouted down the hall. 
-
“How was your visit?” Mor asked hesitantly. She was curled up in an armchair, eyes quickly scanning the page, a full plate of food - likely a few hours old, still on the table beside her. 
“Fine.” Y/n replied, not looking up. The same answer she’d given everyone all week. 
“Any more details?” She probed. 
She slammed the book shut, looking up at her. “What else do you want me to say?” Her voice was low, and she could tell her anger was rising to dangerous levels. Maybe it would be worth provoking y/n’s temper, if only to get some kind of reaction out of her. 
“You won’t eat, you won’t talk to us, and you’re walking around like a gods-damned ghost.” 
She plucked a grape from the plate next to it, popping it in her mouth with an indignant look on her face. “Better?” Gods, she was going to kill her - sister or not. 
“I want you to tell me what the fuck happened before Rhys and I storm over there and kill someone.” Mor spat, rising to her feet. Y/n rose with her, throwing the blanket off, fists clenched at her side. 
“That’s not necessary.” 
“You can tell us anything, you know that right?” She tried to keep her voice gentle, soft even.
“I’m aware,” she snipped, “but that doesn’t mean it’s any of your business.” 
“For Cauldron’s sake.” She ran a hand through her hair, squeezing her eyes shut before leaving the room - in case she said or did anything she regretted. 
“Any luck?” Rhys asked from the end of the hallway. 
“Don’t act like you weren’t eavesdropping.” 
He grimaced, but turned to stride with her. “It’s been three days.” He said quietly, “Cassian and Azriel will be back tomorrow.” 
If anyone can get answers out of her, it would be those two. Even Amren couldn’t reach her. 
-
“Where’s y/n?” Cassian asked the next day. Mor looked to Rhys with a grimace. A shadow curled around Azriel’s ear. 
“In her room probably.” Mor replied. The same place she’d spent most of her time in. 
“Did you piss her off?” He leaned back, mouth curving into a smirk. The smirk quickly disappeared when Rhys explained what happened. 
“Tell her she can come on her own feet, or over my shoulder.” 
He relayed the message, and they all heard the sound of something slamming - along with a wince from Rhys. Mor figured she’d likely shouted something into his mind. Two minutes passed, and nothing. Cassian glanced at Azriel, and the two Illyrians rose - heading down the hall.  
“Good luck.” Mor muttered behind them and Rhys snorted. 
-
“What’s wrong with you?” Cassian’s voice echoed through the room as her door swung open - hitting the wall hard enough there might be a small dent. 
“Nothing.” She muttered, turning over in her bed and tugging the blankets closer to her. Azriel exchanged a look with him. 
“Get up.” Cassian barked. 
“Fuck off.” 
“Not happening princess.” He strode towards the side of the bed, ripping the blanket back. He was greeted by a book careening towards his face, one he deflected with a shield. “You can do better than that.” He tugged the pillow out from under her and she shot up to sit. His stance widened, feet braced on the floor - prepared for a fight. 
“Leave. Me. Alone.” Y/n said through gritted teeth. 
Cassian hummed, tilting his head as if he was debating it. “No.” 
“On your feet or over his shoulder, your choice.” Azriel said from behind him. His voice was flat and smooth. Another book launched - where the hell had it come from? And Cassian let it fly over his head, knowing exactly who it was aimed for. A low snarl came from the corner of the room, and Azriel strode up to stand next to him, forming a wall. Y/n, of course, didn’t look intimidated and no fear came from her - but he did see caution in her eyes. 
“You’re a brat.” The shadowsinger commented, with a tilt of his head. A predator assessing her, waiting for her next move. 
She sent him a vulgar gesture, and apparently Azriel was fed up because quicker than she could react, he had her slung over his shoulder, stalking out her door with a shield covering his wings. 
Smart, he thought as he followed, he didn’t doubt y/n would use that to her advantage. She’s done it before, raking her nails up his wings and nearly getting herself killed. 
He deposited her at the table, shoving her down into the seat next to him before pushing it in. Cassian took up vigil on her other side. If he thought she was angry before, she was absolutely fuming now - sending both him and Azriel a look that promised a slow, slow death. He rolled his eyes, he’d been on the receiving ends of that look frequently, and it didn’t phase him. 
“I thought it was over your shoulder.” Rhys’s voice flooded into his mind. 
“Azriel took care of it.” 
“Obviously. Did she throw anything at you?” 
“Yes.” A strained chuckle came from Rhys, and he felt his presence leave. 
She sat there, taking small sips of water and avoiding eye contact from anyone. 
Cassian let out a low groan before filling her plate with food. 
Mor and Rhys exchanged a glance, their eyes glazing over slightly. “We have things to take care of,” Mor gave an awkward excuse and they both rose. Leaving them to the wolves, then. Wolf - actually. 
“Don’t make me feed you like a child.” Azriel told her when the two were out of earshot. 
“You wouldn’t,” y/n countered, but didn’t sound confident. Azriel reached for her fork, and she snatched it away from him, spearing a piece of food instead and slowly raising it to her mouth. 
“Are you going to tell us what happened?” Cassian asked her. 
She ignored the question, choosing to eat small bites of food instead. 
“Or I can go find out for myself,” Azriel offered. 
“No,” she said too quickly. “Don’t.” 
-
She was confident Azriel would go find out what happened, and that’s not what she wanted. Regardless of whether he heard it from her or figured it out himself, it wouldn’t go over well. But, if they were here when they did learn there’s a better chance of her de-escalating the situation. 
“I’m not ready to talk about it.” Her hand shook, palms going clammy. She saw them exchange a worried look out of her peripherals and for some reason it incensed her further. She’d had enough of people worrying. Well, she fully knew she’d been acting like a ‘brat’ as Az would say for the last few days. But, in her defense they were all busy-bodies who couldn’t mind their own damn business. 
“When will you be?” Cassian sounded … gentle, almost. Like she was some breakable doll. She firmly placed a lid down on her anger, shoving it away. 
“I’ll let you know.” 
“You have until tomorrow night.” Azriel cut in. With a low and obnoxious groan, she slumped in her seat. “Finish your food,” he directed. A particularly nasty look was shot his way, but she relented. 
There’s not a doubt in her mind that he’d make her eat if she refused. The two of them were overbearing and annoying, but meant well. Y/n knew Rhys had sent them in, considering his, Mor’s and even Amren’s attempts had all failed. 
“I thought you’d be happier to see us,” Cassian teased, nudging his shoulder with hers. “It’s been two weeks.” 
“I am happy to see you,” she mumbled. It’s the truth, she was glad to see him, and if she’d actually known they were back she probably would’ve left to at least check they’re in one piece. 
As soon as she’d cleared her plate, Cassian looped his arm in between hers - not giving her a chance to go anywhere. “We’re training.” 
“I just ate.” She protested, but it didn’t work. Azriel trailed them outside, hopefully to make sure Cassian didn’t end up working her to the point she threw up. 
-
She realized the mistake exactly as it happened, both arms raising for a block - and her shirt lifting as well. Revealing two yellowing hand print shaped bruises on her waist. She forced her expression to remain still, to not react, and hoped they hadn’t noticed. But, Cassian stilled. Eyes focused on where her shirt now covered her stomach. Y/n could’ve taken the opportunity to strike him, but didn’t. 
“Where are those from?” He asked her, and she could tell he was struggling to keep his voice even. They’d caught Azriel’s attention as well, from where he was standing a few paces away from the ring. Based on the predatory look of rage in his eyes, he’d seen everything. 
“None of -”
“Don’t.” The general cut in shortly. 
“It’s fine.” She insisted, going on the defensive. 
“Is that … part of what has you upset?” His throat bobbed, and she could tell he was trying very hard to keep himself calm. Y/n turned and ducked out of the ring, returning her sword to the rack. There was no use in lying to them, they both always knew when she was. And when she badgered them for her tells, they refused. So, she took a deep breath and prepared herself to deal with the fall out. 
“Yes. I took care of it already.” Her voice shook with each word. 
“What happened?” Azriel asked mildly. 
She pinched the bridge of her nose, and tilted her head back to look at the sky. She couldn’t look at them now, and didn't want to. Didn’t want the two of them to see her break down. Instead, she focused on the stars above her as the story spilled out. One of her friends' brothers had cornered her. She was in her early-twenties, and had never been interested in anyone. Not in that way. When the … opportunity came up she went along with it for a minute - even flirted harmlessly with him, but when he pressed and tried to push her for more, tried to get her to kiss him, and when he refused … 
“That’s when,” she waved her hand down her stomach, “that happened. I told him to stop but he wouldn’t,” she couldn’t keep the tears from her eyes as the story kept spilling out, of how he grabbed her breast, tried to stick his hand between her legs. 
“And he called me a frigid bitch after I kneed him in the balls.” She finished weakly, forcing a laugh. The two of them had gone incredibly still, and she felt the tears drip from her cheeks onto her shirt. “I took care of it.” She insisted. 
The ‘taking care of it’ worked for a day. Until he came back, thinking she was just playing with him - that she liked the ‘playing hard to get.’ The worst was her friend justifying it, when she brought it up to her. 
“Well,” she hesitated, biting on her bottom lip. “You did flirt with him, how’s he supposed to know?” 
“I told him to stop.” Y/n insisted.
“Just try telling him again.” She sighed. “I don’t want to get in a fight with him.” She told him, again, over the next three days. 
“There’s more.” Azriel said. Gods, he always knew - even if she was just omitting something. “All of it. I need to hear all of it.” 
“I don’t want to talk about it.” She yelled, the anger she’d kept a firm lid on spilling out as tears ran down her face. “I don’t want to think about it, I want it to be over.” 
Cassian strode towards her, wrapping her in his arms and bringing her close to his chest, rubbing her back and holding her through her sobs. Cool shadows swirled around her neck and shoulders, and she recognized Azriel’s way of comforting her. 
“I’m sorry.” She murmured, face still pressed into his chest. 
“None of that,” he replied, running a hand through her hair. “You have nothing to be sorry for.” 
She snorted, pushing back against him. “You’re growing soft.” 
“Just for you,” he grinned but the smile didn’t reach his eyes. 
Y/n yelped as she was gently tugged away from him, instead bundled into Azriel’s arms, his fingers running through her hair and shadows still curling around her. Probably reporting her expressions even as he couldn’t see her face. “Can you tell me now?” 
She exhaled slowly. She wouldn’t get out of this, so she might as well tell him. “He just didn’t know how to take the hint. He thought I was playing with him.” Azriel tensed underneath her, and she scented the pure rage coming from both of the Illyrians and knew if she didn’t say anything else someone in the Autumn court would find their immortal life cut short. “I told him if he didn’t stop I would stab him.” 
“Good girl.” He murmured, but didn’t release her - instead holding her tight as if she might disappear at any moment. 
“Don’t -,” she took in a breath, “don’t tell anyone else.” She pushed back, tilting her head to see his expression. He looked troubled by it and glancing over to Cassian told her he’s feeling the same way. “Please.” 
They looked at each other, as if they were communicating something silently, and nerves hit her - crawling under her skin and swirling in her stomach. She took another step back, forcing Azriel’s arms to hang back by his sides. 
“We’ll make a deal, with a few conditions.” Cassian said, and strode closer to her, standing next to Azriel to make a wall formed of pure arrogance. She groaned internally. “If you don’t agree. We’ll tell him.” 
She crossed her arms, pressing her lips together. “What are they?” 
“Firstly, they’re non negotiable.” He waited for her nod before continuing. “You don’t visit them again. If you want to see her, she comes here.” 
“I’d have to go through Rhys for that.” He gave her a look, as if to say - “that’s your problem,” and she rolled her eyes. 
“Second. No more hiding.” 
“I wasn’t -” 
“Yes you were.” Azriel cut in, raising an eyebrow at her glare. “Rhys told us.” 
“He needs to learn to mind his business.” She muttered and Cassian snorted. 
“If he didn’t tell us, we would’ve figured it out. You don’t miss meals.” 
“I could have just wanted to eat in private.” 
“For three days in a row?” He crossed his arms. 
“Mind your damn business.” 
“Enough.” Azriel cut off the quickly budding argument between the two of them. He’s always been the mediator between the two of them - both ‘blessed’ with quick tempers. 
She wheeled on him instead. “And you have to promise not to tell him.” She needed to be very clear on that, otherwise he would take the loophole and exploit it. He looked conflicted, but ended up promising - unless it somehow escalates, but considering she’ll never see him again - she doubts it will.
“Is that everything?” 
“One more. Anyone does that to you again, you tell us.” 
“As long as you don’t tell anyone else without my permission permission.” They exchanged another look, and both nodded. She stared at them for a few seconds. “It’s a bargain.” 
She fought her smile as she was on the receiving end of twin glares. Apparently they hadn’t intended for it to go that far, but now she knew their word was good. 
“Brat.” Cassian muttered, but started searching for the tattoo. 
She shoved up her sleeves. Nothing on her arms. But, felt a tiny prick on chest, and strode towards the mirror, adjusting her shirt to see. Some kind of constellation was etched into her skin, spreading across her collarbones in a pattern she didn’t recognize. Azriel and Cassian had matching ones - it took them a minute to figure it out, especially with their leathers in the way, but small dots were interwoven with the tattoos already lining their chests. 
“It’s … feminine.” Cassian commented. 
“Nothing wrong with that,” she raised a brow at him. 
“Nothing wrong with it.” He quickly agreed. 
“I think they’re pretty,” she teased, poking his chest. 
-
“Did you figure it out?” Rhys asked later as the three of them met in his office. 
Cassian’s hand ran down his face. “We did.” 
“And what is it?” 
“We can’t tell you.” Azriel replied through gritted teeth. 
Rhys paused for a moment, before raising his brows. “You let her trick you into a bargain? I thought you would’ve known better.” Both of them bristled. Ever since y/n figured out what a bargain was, she managed to word things carefully enough they’d get wrapped into them. Rhys still remembers the first time he met her, back when she was a youngling and before they managed to get her out of the Court of Nightmares. 
“Mor said you could fly,” she whispered - low enough nobody else could hear. She looked up and saw the hesitant look on his face. “I can keep a secret.” She grinned. He gave her a quick nod. 
He saw her again, a year later - now seven years old. “Could you take me flying?” He gave a subtle shake of his head, but every time she saw him she would ask, and eventually he caved. 
“I’ll make a deal with you, you stop asking - and I’ll take you flying” 
“It’s a bargain.” She whispered, and Rhys winced as a small band appeared around his upper arm, a matching one on her. That’s not supposed to happen … she shouldn’t be able to make those without both parties expliciting saying it. 
They snuck her out the next day and took her, if only to keep anyone else from noticing the thin tattoo around her upper arm. He still remembered Mor half-heartedly lecturing her about the danger of making bargains - and not to go doing it with strangers. 
Another idea popped into his head. “Did she say you can’t show me?” 
Cassian winced. “I don’t-,” he turned to give Azriel a sharp look, “we don’t want to betray her trust. But it’s taken care of.” 
Rhys nodded. He’d have to wiggle it out of her himself then, even if that’s nearly impossible. Besides, if the two of them break her trust like that, and she finds out … that would be a fight he doesn’t want to be anywhere near. 
-
Mor promised to get her out of Hewn City, whenever she needed to. Y/n was eighteen when she left, when she moved to Velaris, met Cassian, Azriel, Amren, and started making friends in the city. She should’ve known any ‘friends’ she met living there … Y/n cut off that line of thinking, reminding herself it’s not her fault, in any way. But, her mind still swirls with all of the ways she possibly could have prevented it, or the different things she could have done. For gods sake, she’s told others countless times that it’s not their fault, and they’re in no way responsible for others actions, but she still gets caught in that spider web, in the dangerous abyss of her own thoughts caving in on her. 
“Where’d you go?” Rhys interrupts her and she blinks heavily. 
“Here and there.” She mutters, pushing some food around on her plate. 
“Anything you want to talk about?” Him and Mor have stopped questioning her as frequently, but still try to put subtle feelers out to see if she will respond, or open up to them. 
The words blurt out before she can think twice about them. “Can I speak with the priestesses again?” 
His entire body tenses, his shoulders tightening and eyes darkening. She’d just given him a very clear idea of what happened while she was away.
-
The priestesses. He can only think of a few reasons why she’d want to speak with them. It could be related to her past, but more likely to some recent events. Barely, he manages to keep his composure. 
“I’ll ask them.” His voice is short and he watches her worry her bottom lip. 
“Please don’t do-” 
“Anything rash?” He raises a brow, forcing a cool and neutral tone. 
“I took care of it.” She insisted. Similar to what Azriel and Cassian said. 
“Will you ever tell me? Or Mor? She’s worried sick.” Rhys knew it was a low blow, even as he said it. 
“I’m tired of … I’m tired of talking about it.” 
He wondered why she’d want to go to the priestesses, why she’d want to speak with them if she’s already sick of talking. But then again, he’s heard that sometimes they go into their offices just to cry or scream. Either way, he’s not going to deny her the chance, or that request. He knows without a doubt that they’ll agree to see her. They all love her there, and she spends a lot of her time studying in the archives. Technically that’s her official position in his court - to research, her mind is her greatest weapon. 
“Why don’t you ask them yourself?” 
“I wanted to make you feel useful.” He rolled his eyes, leaning over to flick her nose. She dodged it, swatting his hand away. “But if you’re going to complain I can ask them myself.’”
“Asking who?” Mor swept into the room, her eyes glimmering with curiosity. Rhys took that as his cue to leave, before he got caught into anything between the two sisters. 
-
Y/n mouthed ‘traitor’ at Rhys’s retreating figure, when Mor wasn’t looking. 
“I’m going to ask if I can speak with the priestesses again.” 
“Oh.” She paused, before sitting down on the couch next to her, stretching her legs out in front. “Anyone in particular?” 
She exhaled in relief, something Mor noticed but didn’t comment on. 
“Not Merrill.” Y/n muttered, drawing a laugh out of Mor. 
“Merrill has a good heart.” 
“I deal with her enough already.” Y/n groaned, leaning her head back on the cushion. 
“How is that going?” Mor switched subjects, navigating to safer areas. If she pushed too much on this topic … y/n might shut down again. 
“Slowly. Traveling between worlds, Rhys is obsessed with it and translating some of the old texts takes hours.” 
“Is he now?” She turned, interested, and gave her a small smile. 
“I wasn’t supposed to tell you that.” 
“I won’t snitch.” 
“I won’t either.” She snipped back, but a small smile was on her face, and some mirth dancing in her eyes. She could’ve cried from relief - even if she has other things to think about now, about how she has a very clear idea of what happened. Part of her wants to lecture her sister about bargains, again. 
-
Y/n was forced to stop hiding, the tattoo pricking into her skin every time it thought she was being a bit too reclusive. Still, she wondered if it really was a fair bargain - their silence in return for; not visiting her again, not hiding, and telling them if anyone does that again. She supposes that could mean several things, and they never specified a specific timeframe on when she would have to tell them. In her desperation for them to keep her confidence, she’d done something foolish and doubted they would let her out of that anytime soon. If ever. 
The two of them can be just as tricky as she is, and just as likely to find loopholes. At least they wouldn’t use it against her with the intention to cause harm. She’d never make one of those with someone she doesn’t trust. Even if the wording is iron-clad, there’s always room for error. Most of the ‘bargains’ she’s made are always light-hearted. 
Like making Rhys take her to fly, even if it was the shortest gods-damned flight of her life. Two minutes, if that - and under the cover of dark, after him and Mor snuck her out of Hewn City. Her very first taste of freedom. She was always kept away whenever the Inner Circle visited. Still, she managed to sneak away from the guards, learning how to create diversions and somehow give the impression she was still sleeping in her rooms, enchanting her toys to keep moving, or a pen to keep writing, a book to keep flipping its pages. They never caught her either. She wasn’t even born when Mor left. In fact, she wasn’t born until after Rhys took up his throne. Born into a ‘cleaned-out’ Hewn City, and grateful for it - she doesn’t want to know what it was like before. 
Not many children were around, anyway. The friends she did make were the ones her parents encouraged her to, from foreign courts for the most part. People she’s unlikely to ever visit again. Technically, she could leave of her own accord - but that would mean whoever she’s visiting is going to have someone knocking on their door to drag her away. 
A knock sounded on the door as she slumped back against her pillow, and she could sense Azriel was out there. 
“Come in,” she called. There’s a fifty-fifty chance he’d enter anyway. 
The door swung open, revealing him leaning against her doorway. “I heard you went to speak with the priestesses.” 
Cutting right to the chase, then. “I speak with them every day. It’s part of my job description.” 
His eyes narrowed. “You know what I mean.”
She groaned, pushing herself up to sit. “You don’t need to haunt the doorway, you can come in.” 
“Last time I did, I recall a book launched my way.” 
She held up both hands, showing there were no projectiles in reach. He still looked cautious as he entered, and took up a seat in one of the armchairs, right by her favorite window. She swung her legs over so she sat on the edge of her bed, propping her forearms on her thighs. 
-
Azriel couldn’t help as his eyes shifted down ever so slightly to where her nightdress slipped down, showing the tops of the curves of her breasts. His gaze switched back up as quickly as possible, and somehow y/n didn’t catch the action - instead looking out towards the window. Good, the last thing he needs is to start ogling her, to give her the impression he’s coming onto her. There was something else he could do. He’d need to speak with Cassian. 
“I’m proud of you,” he offered instead. Her head snapped, back to look at him. Her eyes were wide and he fought the urge to shift under her gaze. 
“Thank you,” she murmured, her lips turning up into a soft smile. A shadow curled around his ear, happy, happy, happy. It sang. 
“What do they tell you?” She tilted her head, eyeing it. 
“That you’re happy,” he said honestly. 
She blinked twice, lips curving into an easy smile. “I suppose I am,” she finally answered. 
“You should get some sleep.” He’d noticed the bags under her eyes, how she still seemed exhausted and worn down throughout the day. Azriel had told Cassian he needed to stop dragging her outside and beating her into the ground every day. He’s aware healing is different for each person, but it had been a month since she returned, and his worry only grew. 
“That’s rude.” She frowned, but glanced at the mirror across from her bed. Interesting placement. “I do look like shit.” 
He snorted. “You look tired, there’s a difference.” 
“Sleep hasn’t … been easy.” He could tell it cost her something to admit that. Stubborn pride, just like her sister and cousin. And the rest of them, he supposed. 
“Nightmares?” He prompted, and she nodded. He wouldn’t pry further, but made a mental note to send a shadow in later, to keep watch on her. Maybe it was an invasion of her privacy, but he didn’t particularly care. “I’m right down the hall,” he jerked his chin towards the door. 
“I’m aware.” Another shadow curled around his ear, stay, stay, stay. “Is it too nosy if I ask about that one?” She teased. 
“Maybe.” 
She held her hand to her chest in mock surprise. “I suppose it’s your job to keep secrets.” 
“I recall someone making a terrible bargain to keep something secret.” 
Her face dropped, and he got the impression he said the wrong damn thing. “They’ve already figured it out.” She mumbled, eyes avoiding him. He hated that, hated when she wouldn’t look at him. 
“That’s not a terrible thing.” He fought the urge to rub the back of his neck. He’s never been great at comforting, usually Cassian’s the one to do these kinds of things. Still, he found himself walking across the room, taking a seat next to her. On instinct, his arm wrapped around her shoulders, tugging her into his side. 
She froze, went still for a brief moment, and he was about to move away when she leaned into him, her body relaxing. A few of his shadows swirled around her neck, and she hummed in content. 
Another one curled around his ear, happy, stay. Maybe, for a minute or two. 
-
Cassian went looking for Azriel, he wasn’t in his room - or downstairs or anywhere to be found, and tracked his scent off to y/n’s room, of all places. The door was already parted, and he nudged it open with his foot. Y/n was curled into his side, sound asleep in an awfully uncomfortable position. How tired did she have to be to sleep like that? Almost sitting up. 
Azriel turned his head to look at him, his expression almost saying ‘I have no idea how I got here.’ He held a fist up to his face, fighting back a laugh, and ignoring his glare. He stalked over towards the duo, ignoring Az’s glare as he shook y/n’s shoulder. 
“Stop holding him hostage.” He watched as her eyes opened, half lidded with sleep. 
“Sorry,” she mumbled, hand coming up to hide a yawn. 
Azriel moved his arm away, even if he seemed reluctant to do so, and he pushed back her shoulders so she’d actually lay down. “I don’t want to hear any complaints if your back hurts tomorrow.” 
“Fuck off.” She yanked the blankets back over her, burrowing down into the pillows. It took barely a minute before she was sound asleep again, her breaths evening out, mouth slightly parted in sleep. Peaceful, she looked so peaceful, even with the bags still lining her eyes like horrible bruises. 
Azriel tapped his shoulder, and he realized he’d been staring for a while. They quietly left, gently shutting the door closed behind them. 
“You’ve gone soft.” He told the other male after they were out of earshot. 
“I was just … comforting her, and she fell asleep.”
“Must be really tired, then.” 
“She said she’s having nightmares.” 
Mother above, Cassian wanted to storm the autumn court and bring her back that asshole’s head as a gift. In fact, he’d been debating it for the last few days - but, if anything it would distress her further. Y/n’s never been a violent person, in contrast to the rest of the inner circle. A good contrast. She thought he’d been training her more just to keep her from ‘hiding,’ but his mind was swirling with what else could’ve gone wrong, and if she would have been able to defend herself. Or why she threw herself in whole heartedly, pushing herself harder than ever. 
“She’s been more ...” Cassian pressed his lips into a tightline, glancing behind him to make sure y/n wasn’t behind. “Dedicated, training wise.” 
“I know.” Azriel replied quietly. He couldn’t shake the feeling there was something else they didn’t know.
-
Her tattoo pricked at her as she opened the third letter in the past month. Addressed from her friend, like the last two, but something was different about this one - her name written differently, a small curve to the letters. 
Her eyes scanned the page, picking out the key phrases. 
I miss the fun we had. I know how much you enjoyed yourself. 
You must, should visit at your earliest convenience. 
There was only a general threatening atmosphere to the words - nothing outwardly against her safety. Only him … reminiscing on the past events, in uncomfortable detail. Harmless, she decided, even if her subconscious screamed against her. No pain ripped through her magic, also some guilt crept into her at the feeling - she was hiding it, using a loophole to get out of the agreement, not honoring the spirit of it. 
With a low exhale, she justified it to herself, no need to worry the two of them - they were busy enough as is. Besides, she couldn’t trust them to keep their cool. The guilt would multiply if she knew violence was brought to her friend's doorway. She rolled her bottom lip between her teeth, and crumpled the paper - shoving it in a drawer and reminding herself to burn it later. It was dark, the sun already dipped below the horizon - only vague rays of pink and purple peeking up past the horizon. Her stomach grumbled, loud enough she snorted. That’s a clear signal she needs to grab something to eat. 
She slipped out her door, closing it behind her with a gentle snick. She kept her footsteps as silent as she could as she trailed down the hallway, but she heard … moans - and groans coming from Azriel’s room. Did he have someone over? A small tinge of hurt filled her - not that he was hers, or she had any claim to him. Or Cassian. Why had her mind gone to both of them? “Ridiculous,” she quietly chided herself. She could manage to walk by the room, keep her eyes set right ahead - no need to look at the door or pause, she wouldn’t be nosy. 
Her feet moved quickly, and she spotted the cracked open door in her peripheral, cursing him. Eyes forward, right ahead. No need to look. 
But, she made the mistake of looking at the window, figuring it would be harmless. 
Her mouth parted in shock as she saw Cassian, pressed back against Azriel who had one arm wrapped around his front - palming him through the leather pants. They were both shirtless, muscles toned and gleamed with a light sheen of sweat. Azriel’s other hand was fisted in the General’s hair, their lips crashing together in a violent and passionate kiss. 
She hadn’t realized she was staring, arousal starting to creep into her, until a shadow curled around Azriel’s ear and his head snapped towards her. Cassian quickly followed, and she let out a small yelp - going bug eyed and taking off down the hall. She was not supposed to see that. Not at all … Mother above they need to close the damned door. Arousal flickered through her as she paused at the end of the hall - way out of range, bracing her hand against the wall, she squeezed her eyes shut and willed away the feeling. She couldn’t want them. They were perfectly unavailable, and together, at least in some sense. 
Did Rhys and Mor know? She wouldn’t be the one to tell them. Her mind flashed with more images;
Azriel panting as Cassian knelt in front of him. Azriel hauling him to his feet - throwing him over the side of the bed … 
“Stop it.” She muttered to herself, pinching the bridge of her nose and darting her gaze around the hall. No one to witness, good. She couldn’t remember why she left her room, but she wouldn’t be returning for a while. 
-
It shouldn’t have, but getting caught - and by her, and feeling her arousal from the brief moments she watched them … it spurred him on, sent him deeper into that state of building pleasure. 
She didn’t know they already knew she was there. Azriel  wanted to see how long it took for her to say something, or if they’d have to act first.
“We should invite her back.” Cassian said, bruised lips frowning. 
“Do you want to scare her off?” Azriel asked incredulously. They had actual albeit vague plans for this. To  come in stages, how to trigger various emotions in her. 
“No.” He muttered, entwining his hair at the nape of Azriel’s neck.
“Good boy” Azriel teased and his friend grunted, throwing a half-hearted punch his way. Cassian stiffened under his hand. “You like that?” His teeth nipped at his neck as his hand slipped under his waistband. 
“Do we talk to her about it?” Cassian asked, an hour later - hair messed, cheeks flushed, one hand braced on the doorframe. 
Az propped himself up from where he was still laying in bed. “Let her dream about it.” 
1K notes · View notes
joelsgreys · 1 year
Text
family
Preoutbreak! Joel Miller x Reader
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summary: You and Joel have some news to share with Sarah.
warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. (TW) pregnancy, small age gap (reader is in her 20’s and Joel is 35). fluff, fluff, fluff, Joel and Sarah being the most adorable father daughter duo.
word count: 3.3k
a/n:this is my response to this request right here; a huge thank you to whoever sent this one in!
You let out a small, tired sigh and wiped the back of your hand across your forehead. The early afternoon lunch rush at Moe’s Diner had just ended and you were exhausted beyond belief. Moe’s was one of the more popular locally owned joints in Austin, Texas, and while having a lot of customers coming into the establishment meant earning heftier tips and of course, a bigger paycheck, there was a small part of you that couldn’t help but wish that you could have at least one slow day, just one single day of the week where you weren’t waiting about a dozen tables all at once.
The moment you dropped the last stack of used plates into the plastic gray bin for Hugo, the dishwasher, to come and collect, you washed your hands thoroughly with soap and warm water and then made your way over to the old, electronic cash register behind the main counter to punch in the tips you’d earned after the rush; an hour’s worth of working and you had already made about a hundred bucks to take home at the end of your shift. As you finished logging your earnings, you could feel a pair of eyes watching you from a distance. You didn’t even need to look up to see that it was Joel. He had made something of a habit of coming to join you on his lunch hour. He’d been working longer and longer days lately, and if his only chance to spend time with you was during his lunch break, then that is exactly what he was going to do.
You tossed your receipt into the register and closed it up, turning to your coworker, Melinda. “Alright. All the tables have been cashed out, cleared, and wiped down,” You informed her, sticking your own copy of the receipt for your tips into the crisp, white apron of your uniform. “Mind if I go and take a break now?”
“Go right ahead. Don’t want to keep lover boy over there waiting for too long,” Melinda responded with a teasing wink.
“Oh, shut up,” You snipped at her, although the smile was evident in your tone of voice. You turned around and quickly poured two cups of coffee, a regular for Joel and a decaffeinated roast for yourself. Last week during your doctor’s appointment, your obstetrician reassured you that it would be a while before you really had to start easing up on the amount of caffeine you put into your body, but you figured it wouldn’t hurt to start weaning yourself off of it while you were still in the earlier stages of pregnancy. Better to deal with the withdrawals sooner rather than later. “I’ll be back in fifteen minutes to help you with the next rush,” You told Melinda over your shoulder. You took the two cups in your hands and walked over towards one of the booths in the far corner of the fifties themed restaurant where Joel had chosen to sit today. You set his cup of coffee down in front of him and kissed his cheek lightly before sliding into the booth across from him. “I am so sorry to have kept you waiting. Two for one lunch special brought in a lot more people than Moe had anticipated.” You rolled your eyes, gently shaking your head. “He understaffed us. Again.”
Joel frowned as he noted, “I can tell. You look exhausted.”
“Which is basically code for, you look like shit, isn’t it?” You asked him teasingly.
“S’not what I meant and you know it,” he replied, rolling his eyes at you as he took a careful sip of his coffee. “You shouldn’t be workin’ so damn hard, y’know. S’not good for you to strain yourself, not in your condition.”
“In my condition,” You mimicked him with an amused little chuckle. It earned you a stern glare. “Oh come on, Joel. I’m only about six weeks along.” You shrugged your shoulders and then leaned back into the seat of the booth. “Come back to me with that bullshit when I’m in my third trimester and waddling around this place.”
Joel snorted. “Well, I’m hopin’ that by that time, you won’t be workin’ at all.”
Your playful smile faded slightly from your face. “What are you talking about?” You asked, crossing your arms stubbornly over your chest. It baffled you that he would even suggest such a thing. “We have a baby on the way. That means that I have to work, Joel. I have to work for as long as I possibly can before it comes. And then after a couple months of maternity leave, I’m going to have to come back and work some more.”
“Wait a minute, what about school?” he questioned, raising an eyebrow at you. “How exactly do you plan to juggle studyin’ while workin’ and bein’ a mom too?”
Stumped on how to answer him without upsetting him, you remained quiet and chewed nervously on your bottom lip. He wasn’t wrong. You hadn’t exactly told him yet, but the reality was that you knew it would be tough to handle all three and there was a pretty good chance that your teaching degree would have to be put on the back burner for an indefinite amount of time.
“You’re not givin’ up on that degree,” Joel asserted, as if he had read your thoughts. “No way in hell, I won’t let you. You only have one year left,” he reminded you firmly. “Look, business has been boomin’ on my end of things. If it stays that way, I can get you out of this place. Let you focus on bein’ a mom and gettin’ your teachin’ credential.”
You bit back a sigh. “Joel, it’s a bit too early to even be talking about all of this, don’t you think?” You said after a moment, feeling a bit overwhelmed by the conversation. “There’s no need to worry about that stuff yet.” Noticing the exasperated expression on his face, you outstretched your arm across the able and held out your hand. “I’m serious, Joel. I don’t want you to worry about it, not right now.”
He smiled warily as he took your hand in his. He leaned over and lifted it to his lips, kissing the back of it gently. “Look, I know it’s early,” he acknowledged. “But I’m just plannin’ ahead.” He paused long enough to press another kiss onto your hand. “I just wanna take care of you, darlin’. That’s all.”
“I know you do,” You replied softly, squeezing his hand. You could see Melinda over behind the counter tapping the invisible watch around her wrist as if to tell you that your time was running out. “What time do you have to be back at the job site?”
Joel glanced down at his watch, but it was useless. The damn thing had stopped working once again, and yet he refused to take it to get repaired. “Probably have to start headin’ back soon, actually,” he realized, the disappointment present in his tone. He hadn’t gotten nearly as much time with you as he would have liked. “Oh, I forgot to mention. Tommy said he’s not gonna be home for dinner tonight,” he informed you. “Said he’s spendin’ the night with a buddy, but we both know what that means.”
You giggled. “Another blonde he met at the bar, huh?”
“Yeah, sounds ‘bout right.” Joel laughed and rolled his eyes. “But anyway, I was thinkin’ that tonight might be the night to finally tell Sarah, seein’ as it’ll just be the three of us. What do you think, baby?”
You squeezed his hand again. “I’m kind of nervous, Joel. About telling her.”
“Yeah, me too.” Joel wasn’t nervous for Sarah’s reaction because he’d thought she would feel negatively about the baby or about you. Rather, he knew his teenager would be horrified thinking about how this blessed miracle came to be seeing as he’d signed a permission slip for her to learn all about the birds and the bees in health class at school last semester. At thirteen, Sarah was in that one stage where anything that Joel did embarrassed her—or grossed her out.
And this would certainly gross her out.
“Jesus, here comes round two of the rush,” You muttered, watching three large parties of people walk into the diner. Reluctantly, you released Joel’s hand. “I should go and help Melinda. Besides, you really need to get back to work before you’re late.”
Both you and Joel slid out of the booth and stood up. He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you against his chest in one of those tight, warm hugs that you’d grown to adore over the last couple of years. “I’ll be home on time for dinner tonight,” he promised you. “If you need anythin’ while I’m at work, you let me know, alright?”
You chuckled. “Yes, Joel.”
He let go of you and stood back, his eyes meeting yours. “I’m serious. You need anythin’ at all, you call me, alright? My phone will be in my pocket.”
“I’ll be fine, Joel,” You insisted, shaking your head as you laughed. “Now go on, get going before your boss chews you out for being late.”
“I am my boss, darlin’.” He grinned boyishly at you before pressing his lips lightly against yours, murmuring gently against them. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
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“Ugh, this is too good.” Sarah let out a small groan of satisfaction as she took another bite of her spaghetti. She turned to you a minute later, dabbing at her mouth with her paper napkin before telling you, “Have I told you that it’s my favorite? Because it’s my favorite and I simply must give my compliments to the chef.”
You lifted your chin slightly, feeling pleased with yourself. “Thank you.”
Joel pouted, feigning offense. “Now wait a damn minute, I thought the spaghetti that I made you was your favorite?”
“Dad, you use the jarred crap,” Sarah reminded him. “Her sauce is homemade. She actually makes it from scratch, like you’re supposed to.” She pointed her fork at him. “Your spaghetti is just one step above Chef Boyardee. And that’s being generous.”
Joel picked a crouton from the salad bowl in the middle of the table and flicked it at her. “Turd.”
“Bigger turd,” she shot back at him with a tiny giggle as she picked up the crouton and popped it into her mouth.
“Alright, alright, that’s enough,” You chuckled, waving a hand. “Settle down you two or I’ll put you both in timeout.”
“Y’see what you do? Gettin’ us in trouble,” Joel joked before biting into a slice of garlic bread.
Sarah stuck her tongue out at him. “You started it.”
You giggled, shaking your head.
You adored the dynamic between the two, although there were times when it could be a bit much. Somehow, you seemed to bring a bit of balance to it all—you had become the calm, level headed presence if and when Sarah and Joel’s antics ever went overboard.
You wouldn’t have it any other way, of course.
Although Joel had been seeing you for about two or so years now, he hadn’t introduced you to Sarah until six months into the relationship. You hadn’t been offended by that in the slightest—you knew that he’d done his fair share of dating around before you came along, and he had made the sore mistake of introducing his young, impressionable daughter to a large number of different women who, in the end, never stuck around. Not wanting to cause any further confusion or strife for Sarah, Joel vowed never to bring another woman into his daughter’s life again, not unless he was absolutely certain it was someone who would actually stay.
That woman turned out to be you.
Joel had met you when he and his younger brother, Tommy, walked into Moe’s one afternoon for lunch. Tommy set his sights on you first, flirting up a storm, but it was Joel who you’d connected with. Joel ended up visiting the diner several times after that, going in for a cup of coffee at least every other day until he’d finally worked up the courage to ask you out on a date. That one date turned into two, two turned into three, and by date number six, you two had completely fallen for each other. Joel realized early on that you were the real deal, but nevertheless, he still chose to wait to introduce you to his then eleven year old.
When the time to meet Sarah finally came, you’d been so nervous; you were in love with Joel, but you knew that if his daughter didn’t like you, it could all come crashing down. Your first interaction with Sarah had been a little awkward, but as you got to know each other, things slowly started to shift in the right direction. The more time you’d started spending around her—with her—the closer you two became and your bond eventually flourished.
A few months later, you moved in with her, Joel, and Tommy.
“It’s going to be so nice having another girl around here,” Sarah had told you excitedly while helping you unpack a box of your things in Joel’s bedroom. “There’s way too much testosterone around here.”
The two of you had become inseparable.
Joel often liked to joke that she liked you more than she liked him.
He wasn’t totally wrong about that.
All you could do was hope that the news of the baby wouldn’t change how Sarah felt about you. You loved Joel, of course, but you’d grown to love Sarah too. They were your family.
The timer that you’d set on the oven started beeping loudly, pulling you from your train of thoughts. “Those would be the cupcakes that I made for dessert.”
“Chocolate?” Sarah asked you with shining, hopeful eyes.
“Of course. What other flavor is there?” You winked as you stood up from your chair.
She punched the air lightly. “Yes! Can I help you frost them?”
“As soon as they cool down,” You promised, touching her shoulder lightly as you walked by her and off into the kitchen.
“Tonight just keeps getting better and better,” Sarah sighed contentedly, picking up her fork.
Joel watched her for a moment in silence, a small smile on his face. “Hey,” he said after minute or two, garnering Sarah’s attention. “You really like her, don’t you, kiddo?”
“Of course! She’s got to be like, the coolest person ever,” Sarah remarked in between more bites of her pasta. “What’s not to like? She’s smart, she’s pretty, she’s fun to talk to,” she started ticking things off her list. “She has amazing taste in movies and music. Oh, and she lets me borrow her clothes.”
He laughed, suddenly realizing that the Red Hot Chili Peppers band tee shirt she was wearing actually belonged to you. “You’re askin’ for her permission to wear her stuff, right?”
Sarah batted her eyelashes innocently at him. “She said that I didn’t have to ask. In fact, she said I could just help myself to her side of the closet whenever I wanted.”
Joel tossed another crouton at her. “I don’t care what she said, it’s still polite to ask, missy.”
“I’m just kidding, dad! Jeez,” Sarah rolled her eyes. “Of course I ask her. You didn’t raise a heathen.”
Joel snorted lightly and leaned back into his chair. “Sometimes I ain’t so sure about that, babygirl.”
After a minute, Sarah’s eyes met his across the table. “Hey, dad?”
“Yeah?”
“You like her a lot too, don’t you?”
“A hell of a lot,” he answered, honestly. “You know, I never thought I’d meet someone like her.”
“Me either,” Sarah admitted. “But I’m really glad that you did.” She paused, offering him a tiny, but genuine smile. “You deserve to be happy, you know?”
Joel’s heart warmed inside of his chest. He lightly kicked her foot underneath the table with his. “Look at you being a big ol’ pile of sentimental goo.”
“And this is exactly why I don’t ever say anything,” Sarah huffed, but she giggled. “You always ruin it.”
“Always ruin what?” You asked as you walked back out of the kitchen. You took your seat and picked up your glass of iced tea looking between the two. “What did I miss?”
“Oh nothing, my dad is just being annoying, as always,” Sarah kidded before she began to polish off the remainder of her dinner.
A long, but comfortable silence fell over the table.
You glanced over at Joel, wondering when it would be time. His gaze met yours and he raised an eyebrow, as if silently asking you if you were ready. Although you weren’t, you gave him a subtle nod.
Joel cleared his throat. “Sarah?”
“Hmm?”
“There’s somethin’ that we want to tell you,” he began to say, earning himself a puzzled look from his daughter. He hesitated, as if trying to figure out the best way to just spit it out. “We’ve been wantin’ to tell you this for a couple of weeks now, but we wanted to find the right moment and well, I think this is it—we’re havin’ a baby.”
Sarah’s fork clinked loudly against her plate as she dropped it in surprise. “What?” she gasped, her wide eyes flicking to you. “Are you freaking serious?”
You nodded, wondering if that was a good reaction or a bad one. You couldn’t quite tell just yet. “I’m having a baby,” you confirmed, lifting a hand and running it nervously through your hair.
Sarah stared at you, her eyes still wide and what looked like a smile threatening to break out across her face. “Swear it?”
You exhaled a breath of relief. “Swear it. I’m six weeks right now.”
Letting out a little squeal, she jumped up from her chair and ran over to you, throwing her arms around your shoulders. “I can’t believe this!” She squeezed you tightly—a little too tightly. “Do you know what it is yet? When will you know? Can we start looking at baby stuff this weekend? Can we buy it clothes already?”
“Sarah, breathe.” Joel shook his head, although he was grinning from ear to ear. “And more importantly, let her breathe.”
“Shut up, Joel. She’s fine,” You waved a hand dismissively at him as you wrapped your arms around her, hugging her back. “I honestly didn’t think you’d be this excited.”
“Are you kidding me?” Sarah exclaimed as she pulled away. “This is the best news ever! I’ve been all by myself for so long!”
“Hey, what are we? Chopped liver?” Joel threw his hands up and then brought them back down onto his lap.
“Oh, you know what I mean.”
“No, I really don’t.”
Sarah shrugged. “Well, it’s just been me all these years, dad. But now I get to have a little brother or sister.” She paused and glanced at you. “Is it wrong to say that I really, really hope it’s a girl?”
“Then it would be three against one,” Joel realized, the color draining from his face slightly. “Jesus Christ, I really hope it’s a boy.”
“You have Uncle Tommy.”
“He doesn’t count.”
“Joel!” You snapped at him, causing Sarah to throw her head back and laugh. “Don’t say that.”
“The score is even,” Sarah stated. She pointed a finger at him as she walked back to her chair and sat down. “Two boys, two girls. The baby will be the tie breaker. When will find out what it is?”
“In a few more weeks,” You responded, chuckling at the way her face fell. “Trust me, they’ll go by faster than you think.”
“I can’t wait!” Sarah beamed brightly, looking between the two of you. “Oh man, this is awesome.”
Joel tilted his head curiously at her. “Yeah? You happy, babygirl?”
“I get to have a family,” she murmured, her hand resting lightly on her chest. “A real family, like the ones you see on TV or in the movies." She looked at him, her eyes twinkling brightly. “Happy doesn’t even cover it, dad.”
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4K notes · View notes
dem-obscure-imagines · 4 months
Text
Let It Snow
Pietro Maximoff x Reader
Fandom: MCU
Summary: When the power goes out at the Facility, Pietro makes sure you’re keeping warm.
Note: Takes place in an “Everybody is alive and lives at the Avengers Facility” AU. Wanted to kick out one more Christmas/Winter imagine before getting into the New Year’s stuff.
Warnings: None?
Word Count: 1.5k
Reader Is: Gender Neutral, an Avenger.
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To be honest, you didn’t notice it at first, the slight chill in the air. You continued your work, typing away on the loud, typewriter-style keyboard on the fancy, expensive computer Bruce had built for you (with Tony’s money, of course).
And then it got…worse.
Your toes were numb and you were shivering, despite the long sleeves you were wearing.
You slid your feet into some slippers and walked out into the hallway, arms huddled around yourself as you wandered from your room, down the hall to where the thermostat was. You gave the up button a cursory press, waiting for the screen to blink to life and tell you what it was set to, but it didn’t.
Huh. Well, that was something, wasn’t it?
“(Y/N). Hello.” Vision materialized beside you, causing you to jolt in shock. “My apologies, I did not mean to startle you.”
“It’s fine, Vision. Do you know what this is all about?” You asked, shivering and motioning to the busted thermostat.
“It appears the furnace is broken. Mr. Stark and Dr. Banner are attempting repairs now, but it may take quite some time.”
“Oh. Gotcha.” You nodded, “Thanks for the info.”
“Of course. I do recommend you bundle up. It seems your body temperature is steadily decreasing.”
“Will do.” You saluted and pivoted on your heel, just in time to catch a face full of Pietro as he sped down the hall, sliding to a stop.
You ever so gracefully fell on the floor, staring up at him, disgruntled. “Nice one, Sonic.”
He chuckled, offering a hand, but you got up on your own, dusting yourself off. “What is the problem?”
“Furnace is busted.” You explained, patting his arm as you began walking away.
Pietro started walking backwards, keeping pace with you. “Where are you going?”
“To get into something warmer. Might be a while.”
One of his eyebrows quirked up. “Well, you know, I’ve heard skin to skin contact is the fastest way to warm up, if you need some help with that. I do have ‘improved homeostasis,’ as Banner puts it.”
“I’m good, thanks.” You deadpanned, shutting your door in his face. You could feel him lingering there for a moment before running back down the hall to his room, you presumed. You chuckled and rolled your eyes. Pietro was a flirt. Always had been. But things like this never worked out with people like him. Not in your experience, at least.
You changed into a cozy, zip-up onesie, feeling a lot warmer than before, especially with the hood over your head. You got back to your tying for a while. A few hours at least…until the lights went out.
“Great!” You threw your hands up, rolling away from the desk in your dark room.
In a huff, you stood up and walked to your window. It was a blizzard out there, inches and inches of snow on the ground. There was a knock on the door and whirled around to answer it. Part of you expected it to be Pietro standing there, but instead, it was Steve with a flashlight.
“Oh, hey. Is this because of the blizzard?”
“No, Tony says he snipped the wrong wire.” Steve shook his head. “Or something. Might be a while before it gets fixed.”
It was already getting late, and you were planning on going to sleep soon, but now, you weren’t so sure you should if you didn’t want to wake up a popsicle. “Okay, thanks for letting me know.”
You said, turning back to grab your phone and your water bottle to refill it before you figured out exactly what it was you should do in the meantime.
***
About an hour later, Pietro found you on the couch in the living room, shivering and reading a book by the light of a tiny, battery powered reading light. You were bundled up and, due to the lack of windows, you were pretty sure it was the warmest room in the facility. But as the temperature continued to drop, it didn’t seem to matter where you were.
“(Y/N), what are you doing in here?” He said, concern etched deep into his accented words. You met his eyes, wrought with worry and only offered a shaking shrug.
“I don’t want to g-go to sleep until the h-heat comes back on.��
He shook his head, crossing the room slowly for once, taking his time with each step. He sat beside you, not even bundled up beyond a hoodie and some sweatpants. For the first time in your life, you envied his powers. Carefully, giving you every opportunity to shove him off of you, he gently lifted your blanket, guided your book to the coffee table, and crawled on top of you, settling his body atop yours and sandwiching you between himself and the couch. He pulled the blanket back on top of the both of you, adjusting his head into the crook of your neck.
You were stiff at first, but at his warmth, you all but melted, eyes closing in bliss, your arms relaxing around him as you chased that feeling. His warmth. His scent, that sharp, woodsy cologne he was so infatuated with.
“Is this alright?” He asked, voice low and raspy.
You nodded, relaxing further into his hold, letting him warm you up. You pulled him closer, relishing in the feeling of your shivers slowly stopping. “Pietro…”
“I won’t say anything. The others don’t have to know.” He assured you, meeting your eyes before settling down again.
“I’m not too worried about that.” You whispered, suddenly overcome by it all. His proximity, his voice, the way his body felt melded against yours. It was right, what they said. Fitting like puzzle pieces.
“You’re not?” He asked, mischief at the edge of his tone. “Who are you and what have you done with (Y/N)?”
You scoffed. “You know, contrary to popular belief, I don’t dislike you, Pietro.”
“I don’t dislike you either.” He replied with a chuckle. “Kind of the opposite, in fact.”
Your heart picked up a quicker rhythm, cheeks flushing. You were kind of thankful the two of you were cuddled up in the dark. You hoped nightvision wasn’t one of his secret powers, or you were sure you’d never see the end of it.
“Please say something.” He murmured at the silence.
“You…”
“I thought it was obvious.” He muttered, words quick, flat at the edges.
You let another moment pass, choosing your words.
“I’m sorry. We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to—”
You touched his face with a cold hand, guiding his chin so you could attempt to look him in the eyes in the silvery rays of light streaming in the window. “I like you, too.”
He grinned, breath catching in his throat. “You mean it?”
“I have for a while.” You confessed. “Since that first training session when you bulldozed me on the track.”
“I did not bulldoze you!”
“I don’t know, I felt pretty bulldozed, laying there, flat on my back, feet knocked out from under me.”
He chuckled. “I was trying to impress you.”
“Mission accomplished.” You laughed at the way frustration crept into his words. “I could never forget about it. My very first week on the team and already, someone was out to get me.”
“Oh my God.” He rolled his eyes, the words sounding unsure on his tongue. He shook his head, gaze softening as he reached up, a careful hand brushing the hair out of your face. “Are you warmer now, drága?”
“Much.” You nodded, brushing the tip of your nose against his. “I do have another idea for warming up, though…”
He smirked. “Such as?”
“Do I have to spell it out for you?”
“Please do.”
You rolled your eyes, and looped an arm around his neck, tugging him down to you and crushing your lips to his. He hummed in agreement, calloused fingers hooking your jaw, keeping you close as his kissed you tenderly, passionately, lips soft and perfect and experienced. He was the perfect distraction from the freezing room around you.
Then, suddenly, there was a loud thrum and the power kicked back on, bathing the room in light. You squinted, the appliances in the kitchen all beeping as they came back to life.
Pietro shielded his eyes with a hand, still hovering over you. You stared up at him for a long, quiet moment, still not entirely sure it had happened until he dipped back down and pressed a long kiss to your cheek, his stubble tickling your skin.
“Now let’s get you to bed, hmm?” He asked, helping you off of the couch as the facility gradually warmed back up. The two of you walked down the hall together and you yawned.
“What were you two doing down there?” Bucky asked, standing in his doorway. He narrowed his eyes suspiciously.
“I was just letting (Y/N) know the heat was back on.” Pietro shrugged. “I am the quickest, you know.”
“Uh-huh. Right.” Bucky nodded, suspicious, but backing away into his room anyway.
You got to your door and stopped in the doorway, turning to look at Pietro. His hand grabbed at your waist, tugging you in for a kiss that you gladly returned. When you parted, you watched him speed down the hall, hoping that when you woke, it wouldn’t all be some sweet, winter dream.
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d0youc0py · 11 months
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Even when he wasn’t working his mask seem to haunt him. He wanted to be here with you- but every time he looked in the mirror he was pulled away. Red bumps littered his jaw and some even around his hairline. He had always struggled with acne, having the acne scars to prove it, but it seemed to be getting worse. He’d been in a hotter climate this last mission, the sweat and not being able to air out his face was taking its toll.
He felt so unattractive. He quickly figured out when you feel ugly- you act ugly.
“Sweetheart, open up.” Simon sighed, his hand knocking at the door to emphasize. You two had just gone out on your first date since he’s been back and he snipped at you the whole time.
“Fuck off!”
Ouch.
“Sweetheart.” He started again. The bedroom door finally swung open. His body tensed at your teary face.
“I don’t know what happened to you while you were out there, and god knows you won’t tell me, but you have no right to take it out on me. I’ve been waiting for you to come home for the past three weeks and what am I greeted with? Hostility. It’s like I can’t do anything right.” You sputtered, glaring up at him. His hand instinctively went up to wipe the tears away from your face. He had never been the best at comforting people, but he would do anything to get your tears to stop.
“You’re right.” He admitted. The glare left your face. He was usually much more stubborn- unless he knew he in the was wrong. You softened. “It has nothin to do with work, at least not in the way you think.” His hand went up to rub his jaw but he quickly stopped himself. “I just haven’t been feeling”- He paused. He brought his hand up and motioned to his jaw, turning his head to the side.
“Si.” You murmured. You had noticed a little flare in his skin, but you didn’t really process it. He was always so handsome in your eyes. Your fingers reached up and traced along his cheekbone. “I understand.”
“Shouldn’t take it out on you though, yeah?” He affirmed.
“No you shouldn’t, but I understand now.” You smiled softly, pressing a kiss to his chin. “You’re so handsome, you know.” You mumbled down his neck. He flushed, clearing his throat. “Do you want some help with it?” You offered.
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His metabolism wasn’t what it use to be. Luckily the physical activity of his job kept away any unwanted pounds. That was until he was forced to go on medical leave and spend three months ‘taking it easy.’
He would be completely lying if he said he hadn’t enjoyed it though. Being home with you had been heaven- but a bit of hell on his waistline. He noticed it a bit, but he honestly didn’t think anyone else would. He was rudely awoken when he arrived back at base only to have Soap and Gaz poke fun at him. He knew it was all in good fun, but his first thoughts were about you. Had you noticed? If you did, how did you feel about it? He hushed his own thoughts figuring he would loose the weight out on the field. That was his second rude awakening. He had shed a few pounds, but a few stubborn ones remained poking out over his belt.
“How does Y/N feel about their new pillow?” Soap hummed, plopping down next to him. It had been like this for the past month.
“Sleeps like a rock.” Price grumbled.
“Didn’t know you knew what that was Cap.”
“Soap fuck off.” Ghost growled from across the aisle. “Fucking hell.”
The plane was quiet for a while after that.
John shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He was never one to be insecure, but this was striking a cord. He remembers being younger and overhearing his mother gossiping in the kitchen about the neighbors.
“Alice has gained so much weight. She’s just gotten married too! Couldn’t imagine already letting myself go like that.”
Letting himself go.
That’s what it was. He didn’t want you- or anyone to think that he had ‘let himself go.’ That it was no longer important to him if you had found him attractive. That the two of you had been married for a little over a year so he could just give up. He shook himself out of his thoughts again.
•••••••••
He couldn’t even get through the door by the time you were on him.
“Welcome Home.” You smiled, pressing kisses to anywhere you could reach. He chuckled, leaning into you. He placed one arm under your bottom lifting you up to him. He dropped his duffle bag at the door kicking the door closed behind him.
“I missed you.” He murmured kissing you back just as desperate. He plopped down on the couch, settling you tightly in his lap. All was right in the world till your hands started to wander.
“You get hurt again?” You questioned after he flinched. Your hands went to pull up his shirt to inspect the damage. He stopped you. “John?” You questioned softly. He tangled his hands with yours.
“You know I have a tendency to be a bit old fashioned.” He started. You pressed your brows together.
“John I’ve seen you naked before.”
“No, love.” He chuckled. “I’ve gained a bit of weight and back in my day that was more scandalous than adultery”-
“You know I don’t care about that.” You interjected.
“I know, that’s what makes this whole thing ridiculous. It’s just something I’ve found out about myself, something that I need to work through.” He sighed, pressing a kiss against your forehead.
“Does this mean I can’t touch you?” You mumbled, fiddling with his shirt collar. He quickly shook his head.
“Course not.” He whispered.
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“Johnny, you’re being too loud.”
That sentence had been replaying in his head like a broken record. You didn’t mean anything by it. You were just keeping him in check. Yet he could feel your embarrassment. The heat rising to your cheeks. The panic in your voice. The way you gave total strangers an apologetic smile when they turned your way. He had always been a naturally loud talker. Growing up with five siblings in a small two bedroom apartment was to thank for that. The fact that he had been around explosives for the past eight years didn’t help either.
“Johnny?” You tapped his arm. His eyes fled from the small paper bowl of ice cream to you. “You okay? You’ve been so quiet since we’ve left the restaurant.”
He couldn’t stop a dry chuckle. He grabbed the small bowl, shoving a spoonful in his mouth.
“ ‘m fine.” He mumbled. You sighed leaning across the table gripping his hand with yours.
“Jo.” You pressed again, flashing him your undeniable puppy eyes. He gave your hand a small squeeze.
“Sorry for the way I was at the restaurant.” He grumbled.
“What?” You asked, leaning forward again.
“I said, I’m sorry for the way I was at the restaurant.” He repeated. Your brows furrowed. Suddenly it hit you. Your hand left his and clamped over your mouth.
“No, no, no, Johnny.” You said quickly. “I didn’t mean it like that. Well I did- but”- You cut yourself off. You rubbed your forehead. Your hands reached out again tangling yours and his together. “I’m sorry I made you feel bad. That wasn’t my intention. I just know you sometimes forget your own volume.”
He gave you a small smile, pressing a kiss to your knuckle.
“I know Bonnie. I just don’t like embarrassing you.”
“We’re just so different in that way Jo. My parents were so strict about how loud I was- especially in public. It’s just a stupid habit I have, but I should never expect you to follow it.” You smiled softly. He smiled back at you, the sparkle returning to his blue eyes.
“I should still work on it though. Don’t want to blow your eardrums out, then we’ll both be shouty.” He chuckled.
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“You hate it when I do this don’t you?” You hummed.
“I’m still not use to it.” He sighed, using his thumb to run small circles against your hip. He shivered as your fingers traced over another long stretch mark on his back. He mumbled something and pulled you closer, your body almost completely buried underneath his.
It was no secret Konig was tall. Along with that height came stretch marks. Mostly on his lower back and calves, some even under his arms. Some had faded, a small ridge in his skin to show they were still there. Others were a deeper pink- more noticeable.
“Everybody has them Konnie.” You mumbled, pressing a kiss under his jaw.
“I know.” He purred out as you massaged a small kink out of his back. Truth be told he didn’t really care about them either- until the locker room. That’s when he noticed how excessive his seemed. He had carried that feeling for a while, it wasn’t until he met you did he become more comfortable with it. You had showed him your stretch marks and he saw how pretty they looked on you. He slowly began to figure out that if he thought they looked nice on you, then you probably felt the same way about his. He still tenses when you touch them, his eyes darting to yours for any sign of insincerity. He’s always met with love and want. Just the thought of it causes a flutter in his stomach.
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mediumgayitalian · 2 months
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———
“Hm,” Piper says, fingers steepled. She looks very intently at the air in front of her. “Hm.”
Nico scowls impatiently. “Feel free to be helpful at any given time. Now, even, if you’re so inclined.”
“Have you considered that the reason you’re so infatuated with Will is because you may be blessed by Apollo?”
“I’m infatuated with Will because he is the physical manifestation of everything I value in a person,” Nico says automatically. Then he frowns, processing the rest of Piper’s sentence. “Wait, what?”
Nico understands his error as the grin on her face stretches into something truly grotesque. “I was going to make a joke about your drama levels, but thank you for that. I’m really looking forward to telling several dozen people and delighting in the knowledge that you’re going to curl up into a bundle of humiliation under your bunk tonight as you think about it.”
Instead of answering, Nico decides to walk away. Since there is so much blood concentrated in his skull, resting mostly around his face region, he takes two steps and begins to pass out, but luckily Piper has followed him and impedes a head injury by gripping his arm and merrily forcing him forward.
“So,” she says, steering them towards the amphitheatre, “what’s Plan B?”
“Bold of you to assume there was a Plan A.”
“You like Sunny Boy way too much to walk in there blind.”
“…Touché.”
She’s smug enough to be silent, slinging an arm over Nico’s shoulders as they walk. The closer they get, the harder Nico is forced to grapple with just how godsdamn much he’s softened. I want you to be happy, Father had said. Camp will be good for you, Chiron had agreed. You’re a little twit and need socializing, Mr. D had snipped.
Nico needs a better father figure. He wonders if Paul Blofis’ offer is still open.
The amphitheater is not, of course, empty when they arrive, because Nico knows the Fates personally and each of them despises him. The actual training part is empty — unsurprising — but the stands are moderately filled, with people gossiping, braiding hair, and if Nico is not mistaken, a small, pop-up nail painting salon. Mitchel lifts a purple-smeared hand in an absentminded wave as they step onto the packed dirt.
Nico ducks under Piper’s arm, turning to face her. “I need to fight you,” he informs her. “For my own personal pride.”
She nods thoughtfully. “It does indeed need restoring.” He curved, icy blade gleams in the early afternoon sun, mirroring her dangerous smile. “Square up.”
Since honour is for nerds, Nico doesn’t bother waiting. He simply attacks, lunging for the left side Piper always leaves open. Unfortunately for him, her recent meddling in his love life means her mother has blessed her with a little sprinkling of extra verve, and she dodges easily and cheerfully.
He sends a glum mental prayer down to his father.
Anytime you’re feeling generous, Pop, he grumbles, I would love a boost.
There’s an actual rumble to the ground, as his father laughs at him.
“Real kind,” he says out loud. “Dick.”
“I wonder if you would have more success in the wooing department if you had conversations outside of your own head,” Piper says sweetly. She spins her sword in a neat little circle by his face. “All bay brooding makes you look so…broody.”
Nico scoffs at her. “Will seems to like my broodiness. For some reason. So there.”
“And yet…” She trails off, shooting him a teasing look. Nico is unfortunately very easy to tease (thanks, Bianca) (and for that measure thanks, Hazel) (Reyna too, probably) (and honestly Annabeth) (gods, and Percy) (don’t even get him started on Leo) (really, it would be more prudent to name the people who do not take sick pleasure in driving him up the wall) and as such succumbs easily to her tormenting, taking a hard hit to the side when he’s too keyed up to avoid her spinning slash.
“Note to self, don’t let the monsters know about big embarrassing crushes,” she muses. “They make Nico sloppy and will get him killed in battle.”
She mimes writing something down. This, thankfully, leaves her distracted enough that Nico gets his sword levered against hers, twisting until she’s disarmed. She lifts both hands up in surrender when he points a sword at her throat, but remains entirely unaffected by his glare.
“Pride re-instated?” she asks.
Nico huffs. “No.”
…Yes.
“You’re such a grouch,” she says fondly. She tries to ruffle his hair and is forcibly stopped by his jab to her ribs. Unfortunately, Piper McLean takes no shit sitting down, and in a minute they’re on the floor, getting caked in dust, trying to see who can leave the most bruises on the other. Nico would wager that they’re just about tied.
“You have a list,” Piper grunts, muffled as she bites his bicep. He shouts, wrenching his arm away — she is pointy. “I have no idea what you’re all mopey about.”
He digs his knee into the small of her back. “I gave him flowers! He made a poultice out of them!”
“Technically, you made the poultice.”
He elbows her in the stomach. She shrieks and jabs her knuckles right under his eye.
“You’re so annoying!”
“You’re so annoying!”
“Ugh!”
“Ugh!”
Every part of Nico’s body aches. So badly. He’s not sure which one of them won their brawl, if either, but he knows for sure that he is actively turning purple. He feels like the first time his nonna gave him a hammer and a piece of cutlet — he was maybe five years old — and told him to flatten it. (He remembers, now, the look on her face as she wiped pulverized chicken flesh from her eye. Oops.)
“Go to Will and get healed up?”
Nico huffs a laugh, immediately wincing at the strain on his tender ribs.
“Yep. Let’s go.”
The walk is miserable and bruised. And slow, since both of them are limping. Several campers walk by snickering, since apparently Saving The Entire Damn World, For Real And Actually, You Ungrateful Brat, Should I Just Destroy It Again Then earns you no permanent respect.
It’s not too bad, though. Nico would rather chomp on concrete than admit it out loud, but Piper isn’t horrible company, and she hums when she walks. Bianca did the same thing. For once, it’s a pleasant reminder, although he does wonder if Nico will ever be able to look at the women in his life and not think of her.
(In all honesty, probably not. He sees her in the clouds, in the gnarled bark of the trees; feels her in the warmth of the sun; hears her in every snorting laugh. He likes to imagine how much she would love these women, though. If she were alive they would be her friends first. He knows she was happy with the Hunters, however briefly. He thinks he can maybe forgive himself if he thinks of her without weeping.)
“Least it doesn’t look too busy today,” Piper comments. She purses her lips at the Big House, which for once seems quiet. Perhaps Will made good on his threats and finally dosed the Hermes’ table breakfast spread with Benadryl. Nico would be proud. He deserves a day of peace.
“Great. That means we get the full force of Will’s bitching on us alone.”
Piper scoffs. “Please. You like it when he yells at you.”
Nico almost kills her for real. By the time she manages to kick him off of her, still snickering to herself, they both have a new layer of bruises on top of the old ones.
“Gods, di Angelo, you make it so easy —”
“Shut up,” he says hotly. “You are literally the most annoying person in this stupid camp.”
She sticks her tongue out at him. He scowls, kicking a rock to avoid kicking her and setting both of them off again. It rolls over the grass, pinging off the side of one of the many braziers and rolling finally to a stop back at his feet. In its new position, it perfectly catches the brightly shining sun, refracting the light in a dandelion-esque burst.
“Huh,” he murmurs.
Wincing at his stiff joints, he crouches, vaguely registering Piper pausing somewhere to the left of him. He scoops the little thing up, bringing it close to his face to inspect.
It’s roughly cut, so it’s not anyone’s jewel or anything. Some of the pieces are textured with tiny little divots, like a regular stone, but some are straight and flat and catch the light. Some kind of crystal, then. It’s dense, about the size of a walnut, and shaped kind of like a brain. It is a very familiar shade of blue.
“Holt Hades, you are sappy.”
Nico flushes, shoving the rock into his pocket. “Nobody asked you, Piper.”
“I asked me! I am always asking me.” She jogs to keep up with his suddenly speedy strides, gripping onto the elbow of his shirt when he tries to move faster. “Is this Plan B? Little gifts.”
“It’s a rock,” he says shortly.
“Diamonds are rocks.”
“I didn’t get him a diamond.” He pauses. “Should I get him a diamond?”
She shrugs. “I dunno. I’m not the one in love with him.”
“Who said anything about —”
“Nico! Piper! Hey!”
“Notice who he called first,” she whispers, right in his ear. She grins over at Will before he can say anything. Or curse her. “Hey, Will! How are you?”
It is unfair for a person to look good in mint scrubs. They don’t even suit him, not really, but he still looks — well, he’s beautiful. His hair is poofier than usual and sticks out like he stuck his finger in a socket, and his beam is so bright Nico has to genuinely squint to look at him, and how is it, honestly, that his freckles look like dappled sunlight? That’s not normal.
“I’m okay.” He waves them inside, not bother to close the door behind them — it’s nice out, and Nico knows he prefers the breeze and sun. “Bored.”
“Not enough ocular surgery to perform?”
Will’s grin turns wry. “Nope.” He reaches out to brush his thumb across Nico’s eye scar. He freezes, holding his breath, hyperaware of those callused fingers as they approach the ever-warming skin of his face, heart galloping in his chest. As soon as Will makes contact — because of course the touch was to get his vitals, c’mon, Nico, head in the game — he frowns.
“Why are so many of your capillaries burst?”
Piper smiles guiltily, holding up a hand.
“I beat him up.”
“Wha — you did not!” He turns to Will, indignant. “We beat each other up! She’s lying!”
Will sighs. He glares at them both for a full forty seconds, then turns his face up to the heavens, muttering something that sounds suspiciously like I do not deserve to be surrounded by this kind of dumbassery. Send lightning through the sky if I should let them suffer.
Nico waits. No lightning comes forth.
Will sighs. “Cot, let’s go, y’all know the drill.”
Piper mouths y’all as she sits down. Nico mouths eat dirt back at her.
“Now, I could hum sum’n and —”
“Sum’n,” Piper whispers delightedly. Nico ignores her.
“— get y’all fixed up good, but y’all’ve pissed me off good —”
Nico takes the initiative to pillow-smack Piper in the face while Will’s back is turned. Luckily, it muffles her shriek.
“— so I’m not gonna do all that.” He closes the cupboard with his hip, hands full of vials. “Ain’t even gonna waste ambrosia on y’all, honestly. Y’get some bruise ointment and a Tylenol ‘cause I know y’all were up to shenanigans.”
He puts a lot of emphasis on ‘nan’. Nico knows he is trying very hard to be stern, but he is in fact very cute, and Nico is putting a lot of his brainpower towards memorizing the specific wrinkle pattern that Will’s nose gets when he’s annoyed. If he says that Will looks like a bunny he might actually get shot, no matter how much Will allegedly seems to like him, so he manages to choke down the sentiment. But it is indeed there.
“— and take it easy, y’hear? Bruises don’t heal in a day.”
Gods, his eyes are really, really pretty. He’s almost tired of thinking it, but they match the sky exactly, all the time. Poets write about sparkling eyes and pretty faces all the time, but all of them can choke because all of them are liars. Will Solace has the prettiest eyes of anyone who has ever lived. They are indeed the windows to the soul, and his soul is just —
“This is for you,” Nico blurts. Essentially acting on its own, his hand slips in his pocket and draws out the blue stone, holding it out. “Um. I saw it and —” He glances at Piper, panicked, and she kicks him in encouragement. “Thought of you. So.”
Will stares at the stone for a moment. Nico sweats.
“Nico di Angelo,” he chides, hands on his hips. The panicked look he flits in Piper’s direction grows tenfold. He is not at all comforted by the grimace she sends back. “Do you think I’m so corrupt as to accept a bribe?”
“Um.” Nico hesitates. Piper smacks her face onto her hands, groaning. “That’s not what I —”
“Well, you would be correct.” Quick as a bird, Will darts out and snatches the stone, sliding it into one of his many (many) shorts pockets, nodding in approval. “I don’t have any aventurine. I’ve been looking for it. Good bribe.”
He sets down the ointment and Tylenol, gesturing for Nico to hold out his hands. Nico sighs, then complies.
“I mean, he didn’t destroy it, this time,” Piper whispers as he begins to sing, enveloping Nico’s body in a warm, golden glow. “So…progress?”
“Progress,” Nico agrees. He glances over at Will, eyes squeezed shut in focus, and rolls his eyes fondly. “Who knew it would be so hard to convince someone who already likes me to go out with me.”
———
next
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pursuitseternal · 4 months
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Hi first of all, I wanted to tell you how much I love your fanfictions I'm always happy to see something new (ascended astarion and astarion spawn stories are my favourites but the others are captivating too). I was wondering if you could write a story where the original Tav dies and is reborn a few hundred years later and Astarion finds her again. Maybe in a more modern setting where the prudery thing isn't quite so… strong
I apologise for my bad English it's not my native language I hope you can understand it anyway
“Mistrial:” a Modern Faerûn AU
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Astarion x Tav |E| 2.5K modern au
Ao3 link
Summary: Hundreds of years without her, Astarion still sits on the bench, Justice Ancunìn hear case after case. Until one day, that young prosecutor gets under his skin, until she confronts him after their trial, until ancient memories stir and things awaken.
A/N: Thank you to @myfavouritelunatic and @brabblesblog for their enabling and encouragement.
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“Justice Ancunìn, I have to object,” the little firecracker of a prosecutor ground her high heel into the tile of the courtroom.
Astarion shook his head, tired of her tone already on day one. “You don’t have to, counselor,” he rubbed two fingers against his silver-haired temple, “but given that this is already your twenty-second one today, I can’t say I’m surprised.” She looked at him with sharp eyes and folded arms. The little shit. He did not care for her already.
If this had been in the good old days when Faerûn was at its prime and most debauched, he could have her flogged for her tone and sent to cool in the stocks. And that would have been before he had been turned into vampiric spawn, before he had become hero of Baldur’s Gate with the love of his life at his side. Helping him learn how to hide his immortality and vampirism from the public, learning how to still serve as Magistrate despite his… condition.
That was until time moved on, and his immortality won over the lingering bonds of love. He missed Tav, her brilliance and ferocity, her pointed ears and sweet blood, her passion in life and in the bed.
Like the blink of an eye, he moved on. City to city, career to career as hundreds of years continued their slow grind of time. Until now, now, he stared down from his bench in BGC, new finagled magic in this modern age like cars and electricity and internet. But law was law, and a judge was a judge
It was as if he never left, aside from the new spitfire attorney, just arrived from New Waterdeep, with a ferocity he would have once admired.
He just now found it tiresome. Irritating. He realized after a moment, she had the decency to wait on his final word on her request for objection. He shifted in his seat, narrowing his eyes at her. “Overruled, Counselor Ylfe.” He banged his gavel twice. “In fact, court adjourned until tomorrow,” he stood grumbling to himself. “At least I’ll be spared a twenty-third objection in so many hours…”
His pointed ears picked up on a high pitched scoff. “We shall see,” that lawyer snipped to herself. But that tone, that defiance and jabbing quality… something piqued his interest.
Stirred his ancient memory.
He finally groaned as he rested in his chambers, only moments after shutting the doors and sliding off those scratchy robes. Gods, he missed silks and wigs and velvets. Not this cheap crap everyone wore. He went to his cabinet, taking out a discrete green bottle and pouring himself a mug of its swirling ruby contents. He popped it in his microwave, one improvement on the campfire he would not begrudge using.
Not when it made his stash of blood warm for once.
But even as it hummed, his mind kept rolling over his day. Especially that stubborn, annoying, irritating prosecutor with her defiant eyes and jutting out chin and crossed arms and swaying, perfect hips, and……
“Justice Ancunìn, I figured you would finally have a moment for us to address how to best proceed civilly in your own chambers,” his head shot up, his gaze narrowed as he watched her stride on into his offices.
Her.
“What in the hells are you thinking, Counselor Ylfe?” he spat, fighting hard from baring his fangs at her. A habit eroded from nearly a millennia of practice almost overturned just at the sight of her. “You know any discourse outside of the courtroom can result in a mistrial?”
“This isn’t about the trial, this is about your abject disdain for me, personally, it would seem.” She did it again, crossing her arms and swaying her hips in that tight little black pantsuit of her hers.
Astarion let his eye wander. There was something about her… not many females cut so fine a figure in trousers, or slacks or whatever the fuck they were now.
Not since… her. The other her in his life. His true love. That was the last time he even gave a woman a second glance.
Her hair hung over her shoulder, but now, up close, he could see two pointed ears peeking through her crown of long and flowing hair. Elf. High elf.
He locked eyes with her, that piercing shade… his mind raced and wandered… flying through ancient history for some, the warmest of memories for him. Emerald Grove, Shadow Cursed Lands, the real Baldur’s Gate…
“Didn’t you hear me, Your Honor?” she snapped at him.
Astarion shook his mess of silver locks, smiling in a way that no longer hid his fangs. “I’m afraid I was… lost in the sea of my long and winding memories… darling….”
That made her freeze solid. Her smooth face drew into an inscrutable expression, her cherry red lips parted… “What did you call me…?”
Only then did he realize the slip of his own tongue, how that pet name he vowed never to use flowed right off of it. “D-darling.” He repeated, as shocked as she was at the impropriety. “I’m sorry, Ms. Ylfe.”
“Don’t be,” she instantly replied with a shake of her head. Then she smiled, even as her brows furrowed. She looked at him, at his pale face and silver hair and… dark brown eyes…. “Have you always worn contacts, Mr. Ancunìn?”
“How…” but before he could interrogate that true suspicion, his microwave dinged.
“You better get your drink, Your Honor…” That lilt in her voice was new, he noted.
“I’ll wait,” he shrugged. “I can always reheat it later. First I’ll have to apologize for my… behavior today.”
“I should hope so,” she grinned, walking around and sitting on the edge of his desk. “Treating a lady with such disdain… only to about face and call her darling the next moment… seems something only a true, black-hearted rogue would do…”
“What?” he went rigid. Bending forward, that old instinct to fight or fly racing through his nerves after centuries.
“I’ve never been a fan of contacts,” she smiled so easily as she leaned back against the top of his desk, fingers splayed on his files and papers. “Better if you just showed the world your natural eyes, Mr. Ancunìn….”
His nostrils flared, his breath racing and head swimming. But this time there was no fucking tadpole, he knew that.
“What’s your name…” he hissed, narrowed eyes leveling at her.
“I can tell you, unless you’re bent on letting your stash of blood from getting cold…. Astarion.”
His hand flew to her neck, bringing her up into his face, fangs bared, hackles raised, every long suppressed vampiric sense firing on all cylinders now as he smelled her. “Name,” he commanded.
“Taveria Ylfe,” she swallowed under his hold. “But those close to me have always called me Tav….”
“Tav,” her name was a gasp in his throat.
“And I know you,” she said, breathy and quick. “I didn’t know how… but there was something about you that made me… unsettled.”
“Twenty-two objections later and you call yourself… unsettled?” he smirked, lightening his hold, but stroking his fingers on her skin.
Her skin.
“Well, darling,” she purred, "lifetimes of perfect memory for our kind, and I should have recognized my lover with the crimson eyes and pointed fangs.”
Astarion shook his head, swallowing the rising ball of emotion that caught in his throat. “I’d cry, but it’ll make my contacts hurt,” he gave a wet laugh. His thumb traced on the side of her neck, two circle marks in her flesh, like moles or scars…
“You found them, the brands I’ve have on my flesh ever since you, Astarion,” she added, eyes batting shut under his touch. “I’ve looked for you in every lifetime, my true love with roguish swagger, red eyes, pointed fangs, and massive…”
She paused, pursing her lips.
“Ego?” he offered as an answer, but she shook her head.
“Cock,” she grinned as she bit her lip.
“I was hoping you’d say that… darling…” He hissed as her hand grasped at the gusset between his legs. “Looking for your evidence?” he growled, a roll of his hips into the pressure of her touch. So ancient and familiar. “You’ll get it, darling, if you want it…”
“I do, Astarion,” she sighed, fingers stroking back and forth on the cotton of his pants, feeling that rising erection instantly straining back.
A monsterous growl in his throat, a burning hunger in his belly, he grasped at the back of her neck, pulling her against his lips.
The age-old dance, the same taste. Closing his eyes, his body transported a millennia ago… as if he could smell blood and woodsmoke and magic in the air mixed with her scent. Had he suppressed so much of his senses he couldn’t recognize her scent? Had he ignored the same beat of her heart in her chest, same musical rush of blood in her veins?
He shook his head to let all that go, realizing her hands already tore through her own blazer and button down, clothing now cast to the floor. Already, she had shimmied off the desk, pressing harder into his kiss. He waited for no further invitation, hands instantly sliding her slacks from her perfect curves, his own clothing suddenly feeling too tight and too abrasive.
Astarion only wanted her skin on him now. After so long. He couldn’t move fast enough, his reflexes had dulled from neglect, his dexterity a fraction of what it once was with her. But it, too, slowly crept back, his hands making quick work of his own clothes.
Suddenly, those fingers remembered the smoothness of her skin, rekindled their dexterity. His hand clawed into her hair, the other stroked down her belly, backing her perfect body to perch on the edge of his desk. The gasp he drew from her lips as he sank two fingers into her folds woke something feral in him, something ancient. Vampiric.
“Tav,” he hissed, nuzzing against the music of her artery, rubbing along the stream of her blood in her neck. “May I, please…”
“Mmm, I want to see your real eyes before you take anything of mine, Astarion,” she purred, arching against him. One hand splayed on the desk behind her, she smirked and watched. Never had anyone removed contacts so quickly, so dexterously.
As he blinked, her heart poured open. That scarlet glare, that tilted head, those mussy silver curls. “I can’t believe it’s you…” she sighed.
His eyes went wide, shining in his unshed tears and well of emotion. “I’m so tired of words, Tav,” he replied, voice cracking with that exhaustion and unbridled desire now. “Just give me all of you, to lose myself in, to lose these long and draining years in, years without you.”
Not another word as said, nothing but the groans of their joining once more, the shudder of their bodies as they fucked, the creaking of the wood beneath her as he slammed his hips against it. Cock buried deep in her cunt, fangs digging into her neck.
Both parts of her were hot and leaking. Blood spilled from his mouth once more—warm and fresh and sweetened with her taste. Arousal leaked into the wood beneath them, her musk and sweat the only perfume he longed to smell.
He swirled his tongue over his bite marks, fresh bleeding wounds that swallowed those scars she was born with. A lasting brand on her skin as she had forever been on his heart, his soul.
He couldn’t bring her close enough to him, fingers clawed into her ass to keep her from sliding away with his frantic thrusts. And she had already wrapped herself around his waist, already scratched up the places of his back that weren’t riddled with scars still. Clutching him tightly to never lose him again.
Their lips were sealed together, locked as they sucked and moved and danced in their ancient kiss, the taste of her blood sending them both reeling into oblivion. She keened as her walls spasmed around his cock, that familiar ripple and beat of her climax pressing against his every wild and erratic thrust.
His forehead resting against her shoulder, the scent of her blood there was the last little push he needed, losing himself in the trembling warmth and comfort and pull of her body. His cock pulsed hard inside her, thrumming against her muscles as he came harder than anything for a thousand years. Forcing his head back up, he locked eyes with her, face twisting and arms shaking as he came. Lips pulled back to show those glistening and reddened fangs.
Her hand braced hard at the back of his neck, keeping her with him as his hips thrust, slowing as he emptied into her. At last he stilled, a foolish, young smile on his gaping lips, lips he licked clean.
He would tell her sometime, how she had made his undead heart remember how to beat and love again twice now. How she brought him back to life over and over again. But with that haze in her eyes, the way she clenched still around his cock, he knew this wouldn’t be the end of their reunion.
Thank the gods.
Lips curling as she met her mouth in a kiss, she drew him in again for more. “I have a hotel…” she whispered.
“And I have a penthouse, darling,” came his instant reply between her ravenous caresses.
“Hmm,” she laughed deep in her throat, their kiss still working slowly, unable to break apart once more. “As long as you keep it cleaner than your tent once was, I accept. Someplace for us until the morning when we return to court…”
His fingers, coated in the scent of her arousal, stayed her mouth. “Tch, surely even a young thing like you knows this will end in mistrial now,” he smirked. “Not even I can think of a clause that allows for lost soul mates to continue in court after such…” he glanced at the mess between their legs, “…debauchery.”
“Oh well,” she feigned disappointment, sliding off to retrieve her clothes. “Worth it…”
Suddenly his arms gripped her, pulling her by the swell of her ass, flush against his naked body one more time. “It’ll be days before either of us must return to court… long, exhausting, pleasure-filled days, darling.”
Tav dove up for his kiss, standing in her tiptoes to meet that smirk that haunted her for centuries. “You better hurry me away to your place, Astarion, or someone will find us here making up for lost time.”
Reluctantly and with a deafening sigh, he relented, busying himself to dress again.
“Oh,” she commented, that taunting tone in her voice, “and don’t think I missed how you never answered it your place was still a mess of chaos again.”
He turned, shaking his head as he refastened his belt. “Well, even if you are disappointed in that regard, I can assure you…” he gave her that look, those half-lidded eyes, that sharpened fanged smirk, “you won’t be left wanting in other regards.”
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ghost-proofbaby · 11 months
Text
if it were anyone else (e.m.)
warnings: strong allusions to depression, disordered eating/rough relationship with food, mentions of smoking, description of a sort of panic attack. very sad. hurt/comfort? not edited.
wc: 1.6k+
a/n: this is literally entirely self indulgent and written entirely after i sat and cried and thought "i wish i had eddie here right now to hold me". maybe in like thirty minutes tops. this is for me and only me. go figure lol. sorry. yeah. anyways.
if you relate, my askbox is always open, and i'm very sorry you've felt this way as well. i hope you all take care of yourselves. drink some water, call a friend. be kind to yourself.
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“I’m worried about you.” 
Four words that always manage to strike a certain type of fear in your gut. You don’t know how to react as he says it, how he wants you to react. You can only stare blankly, you can only wish harder for the earth to swallow you whole.
“What do you mean?” you laugh nervously, following it with a hard swallow.
You’re playing dumb. You know it, he knows it. The tremor in your bones and your numb appendages know it, too. 
“You’re…” Eddie stalls, licking his lips, letting his eyes rake over you, “You’re getting bad again.” 
You’re quick to shake your head, forcing another hollow chuckle from your chest, “It’s not that bad. I’m fin-”
“You’re not fine.”
The look in his eyes could crack your spine if you stare too long. Wet eyes, a trembling bottom lip, worry lines etched into his forehead that you realize might be caused by you.
You’re causing him worry. The last thing you want to do, you’ve accomplished. You’re on a fast-track to becoming a burden – the first step is always acceptance. 
You’re still unsure of how he wants – no, needs you to react right now. This conversation is a landmine for both of you, and you hold every breath with every step as you try to navigate it. If you make one wrong step, it could cause an explosion that spares no survivors.
You don’t mind if it tears you apart limb by limb. You do mind if it hurts him. 
“How… How do you know that?” 
It’s not a sarcastic snipping or defensive deterrence. It’s an unfiltered response of genuineness – you want to know the signs, you want to know what has exposed the rot this time.
And then, maybe next time, you’ll be able to better shield it from him with this knowledge. 
“How could I not?” he takes a deep breath in through his nose, and you focus on the flare of his nostrils rather than any of the tears beginning to gather at his waterlines, “It’s been happening for a while now, though, hasn’t it?” 
Your throat is a cage, tight and restrictive and ringing with a bitter metallic taste in its tenseness. You can’t respond with words. You can only nod. 
He chooses to answer your question more properly now that you’ve admitted it, “You’re cold all the time again. You’re always sleeping too much or too little. You’re smoking again, running yourself into the ground. Picking up distractions like they’re going out of style.”
“Hey, they might be. We never know-” you cut yourself off when your eyes meet his. Now’s not the time for jokes, “Sorry. I… I know. I’m sorry.” 
He’s right. Fuck, he’s right. 
“I want to ask you something, and I need you to answer me honestly,” his own steps across these landmines are just as delicate, just as feathery light, as your own. You hear it in his tone, see it in his body language. You wish your body could sink into the mattress you’re sitting on the edge of as he crouches in front of you, warm palms connecting with your knees. Grounding you. Tethering you. Holding you back from that sinking you crave. “Are you… Sweetheart, are you okay?”
If anybody else had built up to such a stupid question, you would have laughed in their face. You would have shoved those warm palms right off of your skin and you would have thrown up those ice cold hands of your own, shouted obviously not. 
Obviously not. I’m not okay. I’m so far from okay, it’s a bit comical. I am drowning. I am treading in freezing cold waters and I am barely capable of keeping my head above the waves. My engine is fucked, my tank is empty. I don’t think I’d even know how to be ‘okay’ again if you did manage to pull this mangled body of mine from these depths and sat me down on safe, solid ground again. 
You can’t say any of this, though. Not because you don’t trust him, not because he would judge you. But because the moment he asks the question that should make you scoff, you let out a sob instead. Something like a muffled, broken wail that tears from deep within you. It had already been ready and poised, laying in wait for a perfect moment like this one to escape. 
His eyes aren’t the only glossy ones anymore. 
“I-” you start, breathing already stuttering and chest already constricting, “I- I-”
“Hey,” he palms smooth up your thighs, carrying their warmth with them, as if he were trying to spread it across you. As if he had heard your thoughts. As if he already knew all about those dark, treacherous, freezing waters you were stranded in. All you can do is spew out another cry, strangled as you tried to swallow it down before it entered the atmosphere between you two, “Hey.” 
You only notice the tears when you crumple forward and he meets you halfway. Those warm palms, those hands so capable of safety and promise, cup your cheeks and his thumbs make quick work of swiping away the salty streams. 
“Hey, baby, breathe for me,” his voice is tragically gentle, “Just one deep breath, okay?” 
To demonstrate, you watch his chest expand dramatically, his hands forcing you to keep your eyes on him. 
You can’t see through the bleariness. 
“C’mon, sweetness,” he encourages again, “One breath. Just one.” 
If it were anyone else, you’d turn into a fit of rage at the coddling. You’d break everything in sight. You’d scream until your already burning lungs finally collapsed as they’d been yearning to for so long. 
But it’s him. It’s just him, it’s just Eddie. 
His chest rises dramatically again, and this time, yours does as well, albeit through stifling hiccups. You’re dizzy from the lack of oxygen and the flood of emotion that was wrecking you. 
“There you go!” his voice rises ever so slightly, and when you flinch a bit at the sudden volume, he retracts, “Sorry, sorry. But that’s it, sweetheart. Another one, okay?” 
Another breath. Another sob. Another wave of all the pain you’ve been battling off. 
You’re cold all the time again. You’re always sleeping too much or too little. You’re smoking again, running yourself into the ground.
He was right and it fucking killed you. None of those are things you could ever shield him from. You didn’t have the heart to pull away those numb and icey fingertips every time he’d reach out for your hand, or try to cover the shivers that managed to rack your bones even in the middle of summer. The sleeping situation had been spiraling, a pendulum of sleepless nights that would end in a sleep so deep that you could have been mistaken for resting with the dead. Maybe the smoking you could have hid, especially when you’d been so boastful about quitting. 
You weren’t running yourself into the ground. You had already collapsed into the dirt, you had already joined the worms. You’d buried yourself alive, six feet under, and nothing could have stopped him from sniffing out that scent of decay on you. 
The death of a soul and mind. The death of the thing that had propelled you forward for so long. No amount of sweet perfume, or hour long scalding showers, or minty gum to occupy your mind rather than a proper meal, can erase that stench. 
You never could have shielded him. He always saw right through you. Always had, always would. 
“I’m sorry,” you end up crying out. 
You don’t know what you’re apologizing for, but you echo the words again. Over and over, on repeat, until he’s rising from the ground. Until he’s sat beside you. Until his arms are suddenly encasing you and you’re awarded a warmth you didn’t feel deserving of. 
He doesn’t smell like the decay you’d surrounded yourself with. He smells like slow waking in the morning, dreary and calm and at a reasonable time. He smells like warm baths that only relax your bones, and don’t have to blister your skin in the process. He smells like three meals a day, all comforting and all effortless and that never linger with a sense of regret.
He’s not decay, never even treading close to death. He’s home. He’s the promise that you could be okay. Even if it isn’t right now. 
“Don’t apologize,” he murmurs into the crown of your head, squeezing you tighter into his chest, not even blinking an eye at the patch of wetness you leave behind from where your cheeks bury against him, “Never apologize. Ever. Not with me, sweetheart. Keep the sorries. I don’t need them.” 
If it were anyone else, the holding would have suffocated you. But it’s him. It’s Eddie.
You don’t fight him when he pulls you fully into his lap, situating the two of you comfortably on that mattress. 
You don’t know how long you let him cradle you like that. How much of that time is spent filled with your cries, or how many breaths he gently urges you to take with him. He never once has to verbally say what you already know; he never once promises aloud that it’ll be okay. He doesn’t put that pressure on you, not yet. Not today. Not when he knows the journey to okay is still such a long one. 
“I’ve got you,” he whispers to you instead, “I’ve got you, now, sweetheart.” 
If it were anyone else, you wouldn’t believe them. 
But it’s him. It’s Eddie. 
And he’s got you, for now and for as long as you need.
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Tressym can be Fickle
WORDS: 692 RATING: G PAIRING: Gale x Tav SUMMARY: based on a very real arguement between my husband & I on who our cat likes more.
It had been a long, arduous, grueling day at the academy.
Though Gale loved his new role as a professor and educator, teaching the young minds of witches & wizards all across Faerun to harness their magic, induction week was the worst. He felt his life was in less peril fighting the Elder Brain or any of their other enemies & cohorts along the Sword Coast than he was now. Testing the new inductees to file them accordingly to their skill. ‘Skill’ being a very loose word tossed around this week.
He returned home that evening with a heavy sigh through the door, an even heavier thud of his satchel filled with books, and a desperate need to be tended to by his spouse. The whole day had been about soothing the egos, feelings, and on occasion literal wounds of new students that Gale thought he deserved some tending to now.
“Tav?” He called out as he put his cloak away. Usually, they greeted him at the door. Or at least acknowledged him when he came home. Curious, Gale walked through the house to try and find them. His search not long as he came upon Tav in the living room. On the couch by a low fire, with Tara on their lap. “Well….don’t you two look cozy.”
“Hmm, we rather are Mr. Dekarios.” Tara agreed. “Or at least we were, until someone started shouting.”
“Apologies for shouting in my own house.” Gale snipped at Tara. Taking his own plush armchair across from them. “Since when did you become a lap cat? And, before you get too ruffled under the feathers, it’s a figure of speech.”
Tara hummed. Seeming to debate about not letting it go but was perhaps indeed to comfortable to make a fuss. “Very recently I suppose. I never had an interest until now.” The tressym purred with her eyes closed as she tilted her head up towards Tav and her head scratches.
“You never took an interest with me.” Gale said with a deep frown.
“You do not have nails, Mr. Dekarios.”
The wizard growled and stood up. Unable to watch his dearest friend and lover betray him like this in front of his own eyes. It was still early for dinner but he stalked off towards the kitchen to focus his frustrations on what to eat.
A few moments later, Tav came in. Looking confused on why he was so upset. “Sorry.” He apologized quickly. “It’s just been a long day. And I am glad that you and Tara are getting along now. Guess I’m being….overly sensitive at being shut out. Tressym can be fickle, but I’ve never known Tara to change her mind about anyone. Again, not that I’m not pleased you two are getting along. I just never thought I would suddenly be second in her estimation.”
“Suddenly second? Please Mr. Dekarios.” The couple turned to see Tara trot in. Seeming interested in their conversation. “I wouldn’t say that you were suddenly second. Not given my high esteem of your mother. A better estimate is which one of you is second on the day, and who is third.”
“Really Tara? Kick a man while he’s down??”
“But, I’m a reasonable creature. Perhaps my estimations can be over swayed. Perhaps with a bit of chicken? Fried pigeons if you have any?”
“So a creature of reason but not honor, eh?” Gale stated, with a wave of his hand as if he wish to brush away this whole conversation.
Before he could leave, Tav wrapped their arms around his waist. Pulling him close. The smell of their hair in his nose. Something like ‘you’ll always be number 1 to me’ muffled into his chest, which causes him to smile and hold them back.
They tell Gale to go upstairs and relax. Take a bath if he liked, while they made dinner. That sounded heavenly, so he did just that.
When he came back down, he was not amused by the roast chicken on his plate. Nor the grinning little tressym in the corner, licking her chops like she’d just swallowed a canary. Or, perhaps, her bribery chicken.
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stupidlittlespirit · 6 months
Text
First Kiss
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Rating: SFW, fluff Type: Drabble Tags: first kisses, alcohol, making out, no use of pronouns for reader, reader is wearing a skirt, slight Serizawa x reader, vague mention of vomit (nothing overtly descriptive), jealousy Word count: 4363 My other works: here on tumblr and here on Ao3! Reigen gets drunk, jealous and kissed.
(This has been in my drafts since January and I figured you guys might like it :) )
Staff parties are just the worst. 
Well, they're the best, but for all the wrong reasons: They’re noisy and messy, and you get an excuse to spend time with handsome men under the guise of simply being colleagues.
You're exceptionally drunk, perched beside your team in a rowdy bar as you watch them misbehave.
Serizawa is flushed a happy pink, tipsy but still managing to keep himself together. Dimple, possessing his favoured security guard for the night, is plastered against Serizawa's side. Reigen, however, is much worse for wear. He's slumped over the table as Serizawa is speaking, eyes half-lidded and likely not paying attention. 
Wait. Serizawa is speaking. 
"-maybe that's why? I guess I just never tried..." He’s saying, a little forlorn but soft as always.
You shake your head and shuffle up in your seat, leaning over to nudge Reigen.  "What's he talking about?" You hiss, hoping you don't make it obvious. 
Reigen shrugs sloppily, his shoulder bumping yours as he lurches. "Dunno." 
"Dimple said Mob was talking about first kisses this morning," Says Serizawa, shifting in his seat to address you directly. He doesn’t look upset at your poor listening skills, more amused.
Clearly you weren't being subtle enough. 
"Then he asked if I'd had one, and I haven't. I’d like to, though.” He shrugs. “Maybe one day.”
Now that you're caught up, you gape at Serizawa. 
"So you've never been kissed?" You ask, leaning forward. "Like, at all?" 
He shakes his head but doesn't look bothered at all. It's more like he's stating a fact, but it makes you feel a little bad for him. 
Reigen laughs uproariously. "Never been kissed?!" He claps Serizawa on his shoulder from across the table. "That's gotta suck!" 
"I guess you can relate." Dimple smirks from behind the lip of his beer bottle. 
Reigen almost inhales his cocktail through his nose and you have to beat his back to stop him from choking to death. 
"N-not at all!" He cries, desperately waving his hands around. "I've kissed plenty of people in my life-" 
"I'll kiss you." You cut in, making Reigen choke again. “If you want one, that is.”
Serizawa turns even pinker and he looks over at you shyly. "R-right now?" He squeaks. “Here?”
"Sure." You shrug.
It feels bad knowing Serizawa has never experienced the joys of kissing someone, and you want to offer the chance in a comfortable setting. 
Serizawa looks excited and adorably bashful when he nods in agreement.
You’re a little surprised he’s bold enough to take you up on the offer, but you suppose with a few drinks in him, he’s braver than he might usually be in a social setting. 
Untangling yourself from your seat, you swap sides at the table to sit next to him, bumping Dimple with your hip until he acquiesces and moves to your seat.
Meanwhile, Reigen makes his grievances known. 
"This is so unprofessional-" He starts, brows furrowing.
"Yeah? What do you know about being a professional?" Dimple snips back, watching you and Serizawa closely. "Let the kid learn!" 
"You would say that, pervert." Reigen slurs. “And I’m always professional.”
Ignoring their bickering, you place Serizawa's hands where they need to be; one on the side of your face, and the other on your waist, and roll your shoulders back as though you’re preparing for some strenuous exercise. A first kiss is serious business and it wouldn’t be beneficial to him to fuck it up. You want Serizawa to relax, to learn that these things aren’t as scary as they might seem, so that when he does find someone he wants to try it with again, he won’t freeze up and ruin his own chances. From what you’re seen, Serizawa is pretty skilled at that. 
Beet red and wide eyed, Serizawa’s gaze darts all over your face, from your own eyes to your mouth and back again. He’s evidently already overthinking this.
"A-are you sure you're okay with this?" Serizawa asks, voice cracking.  
You nod feverishly.
Serizawa is very handsome and very cute, so it's hardly a chore to indulge him in the art of making out. 
You lean into his palm with a warm, encouraging smile, and dip your head until your lips meet his. 
Someone at the table makes a small, high pitched noise but you're not sure if it's Serizawa or one of the others.
The kiss is simple; you don't want to frighten him by adding anything too complex, yet he's eager and surprisingly natural in his movements.
Serizawa makes a content little noise and leans into you, hand tightening on your waist to pull you closer. He tastes like cheap beer and buttery edamame, a whisper of sweetness amongst the heavy alcohol. 
Much to your pleasant surprise, his lips part after a moment and you gently tease him into a slightly deeper kiss. 
Serizawa seems to be enjoying himself and you're happy to indulge him if he wants to try something more. 
When you pull away, you drag your teeth across his lower lip gently and he smiles, hazy, chasing your mouth with his own for a moment.
Dimple lets out a low whistle from across the table and leans forward on the table, chin propped in his hands as he watches with rapt attention. 
You break apart with a soft smack! and Serizawa looks over at you like you've punched him in the nose. He's dazed and his gaze is totally unfocused, but there's a little smile on his face and it’s clear that he’s quite happy with his demonstration. 
"Okay?" You ask quietly, face still close to his. 
Serizawa nods slowly. “Uh huh….”
You grin, squeezing his shoulder as he releases you, and you stand from your stolen seat to go back to your own. 
"There you go, it isn’t that exciting, really, but now you know." You shrug. 
Dimple laughs, elbowing Reigen in the ribs as he gets up. 
"Seems pretty excited to me!" He smirks.
You give him a good-natured shove on the way past before you drop back down next to Reigen. 
Now that your focus is back on the room at large, you notice that your boss looks like he's going through all five stages of grief simultaneously; Reigen is clutching his drink tight, gaze fixed on the table top with his jaw set tightly shut. He barely acknowledges you when you sit down again, looking like he's ready to burst at the seams.
"Are you okay?" You ask, giving him a gentle nudge with your shoulder. "If you're gonna puke, you better do it outside." 
Reigen glances at you from the corner of his eye. He doesn’t look pleased at all and you feel like you might have just made a mistake.
"'M gonna go get some air." He mutters finally, sliding out of his seat.
Reigen snatches up the half-empty box of cigarettes on the table and stumbles unsteadily off his stool without another word. He doesn't even have the grace to make up an excuse before he leaves.
You watch him go, hesitant to follow him. 
“What's his problem?” Dimple says, rolling his eyes. “He’s been so stuck up lately.”
It’s true; for the past week in particular, Reigen has been in a sour mood. 
The first time it had been noticeable was the Monday morning you’d worn your first skirt of the summer to the office. It had been hot and stuffy, and you weren’t about to bother with cloying tights or trousers, however Reigen had taken one look at you and gone to work in the spare room until lunchtime. He’d made a few quiet comments about dressing professionally as a woman until Dimple had told him that he’d wear the same thing if Reigen didn’t stop bothering you about it. Since then, he’d done nothing but sulk and avoid you.  
The general chatter amongst the three of you returns, until a few minutes of his absence turn into twenty, and eventually you realise you're going to have to go and fetch him. He’s either grouchy again or he’s passed out somewhere and aspirated on his own vomit, and neither seem like a pleasant end to an otherwise fun night.
You excuse yourself and pick your way through the throngs of suits until you reach the exit at the front of the bar. 
It takes a few seconds of scanning until you spot Reigen, bathed in the flickering light of the bar’s sign. His grey suit reflects the ugly neons, marring it an odd blue-green, and he stands out against the dim street. He’s trapped behind the ropes of the smoking section nearby, halfway through his cigarette and staring off into the night sky.
Silently, you come to stand at his side. 
"How long does it take to smoke?" You laugh, hoping to ease the immediate tension he gives off. 
Reigen shrugs, running his tongue over his teeth. 
You frown at his unusual silence, slightly concerned that he can barely even bother to dein you with a simple 'hello'. 
"Have I upset you?" You ask gently. 
Reigen's eyes dart to you, though he stays facing forward, and he clears his throat. 
"No, I just…" He sighs around the filter of his cigarette, shaking his head. "It's nothing." 
To his right, there's an old looking bench that's clearly been shoved into the corner here for the drunkest smokers to sit at. It's probably to deter people from sitting on the floor when they're wasted and making the place look untidy.
You take a seat on it and gesture for him to sit beside you, running your hands over your arms to ward off the chill of the night. 
Reigen looks uncomfortable at your offer but does as he's told anyway. He keeps a distance from you and focuses on puffing out a crude smoke circle so that he doesn't have to look at you.
"Reigen, if I've done something to upset you then it's not nothing." You press him for more detail, shuffling up to sit closer. 
You don't care if he doesn't want to be near you, you're starting to panic that you might have ruined a friendship that's extraordinarily important to you.
Reigen is a great boss and an even better friend. He's smart and kind, and he's the most compassionate person you've ever met. For all of his faults, he's an incredible guy. 
It doesn't help that you're a little bit in love with him, of course. 
No one else in the office knows. You've kept it to yourself and tried to ignore it; the affection you hold for him is inappropriate after all. He's your boss and if you were to confess, he'd only reject you on those grounds. You'd end up losing your job and your friends, and you can't stand the thought of that happening. It's better to just ignore it and admire him from afar.
At your side, Reigen sighs quietly and takes a long drag on his cigarette. He holds his breath for a moment and you can see the cogs in his mind turn as he weighs up if it's worth telling you. After a pause, he breathes out a long puff of smoke and flicks the ash from the end of it. The cherry glows red in the darkness.
"I'veneverbeenkissedeither." Reigen mumbles, ducking his head.
It comes out as a long string of words, barely understandable, and you frown. 
"Huh?" 
Reigen groans. His shoulders rise up around his ears and you realise that he's embarrassed about whatever he's trying to say. 
"I've never been kissed either." He repeats through gritted teeth, eyes fixed on the distance.
"Oh." You breathe.
Oh. 
He's not angry, he's jealous.
“But you said-”
“I lied.” He huffs. “Obviously.” 
Reigen looks mortified the moment he admits it aloud, his cheeks turning pinker than they had been inside. He sucks in a sharp breath and cringes away from you, humiliated.
"I'm sorry," he cringes. "That was dumb- I shouldn't have said anything, I was just-" 
"You're kidding, right?" You say, unable to keep the disbelief from your voice. 
Reigen rubs the back of his neck awkwardly, hanging his head as though he's ashamed by it. "No." He mutters.
You're genuinely a bit surprised. "Oh, I just figured…." 
"Figured what?" Reigen says, a little bitter. "That people would actually like me?" 
The way he says it makes your heart bleed. 
Reigen is quite the charmer. You had assumed he'd be very popular in terms of romantic partners. Sure, he's a little caustic at times but ultimately he's a good guy and had you been strangers, you certainly would have tried your luck with him. There's no reason that you can think of that anyone would turn him down, unless he’s the one getting in his own way.
"Reigen, don't be ridiculous." You laugh softly, leaning into his side. "Of course people like you. I like you! You're funny and sweet, and handsome and nice. Anyone would be lucky to have you." 
Immediately Reigen's head shoots up and he turns to look at you, face slack with surprise.
"You think I'm handsome?" He asks, his cigarette limp and bobbing about between his lips as he speaks.
Fuck.
The drink has made you slip up. It's probably not normal to tell your boss you think he's the best thing since sliced bread and you feel a heat crawl up your throat.  Now really isn't the time. You're both wasted in a public place, far from home and with other people, it's not an ideal place to confess to your boss how much you desperately want him. 
"Reigen, listen," you say, attempting to laugh off the accidental admission. "You're a catch!" 
You offer him a weak smile and tug on his tie gently. It's supposed to be annoying, but drunk as he is, Reigen leans into you instead. 
"I am?" He says faintly.
The warmth spreads from your neck to your cheeks and you're abruptly aware of how close his face is to yours. The cigarette's smoke wafts up between you both.
"Yeah." You shrug, attempting to sound nonchalant. "Of course." 
Reigen's dark eyes search yours for a moment, like he's waiting for you to say something else.
When all you do is offer him a tight smile, afraid that you've fucked up, he wrinkles his nose in annoyance. 
"Oh," Reigen says petulantly, smoke streaming from his nostrils. "So sweet little Serizawa gets a demonstration but I don't?" 
You struggle to keep the surprise from your expression. After his avoidance for the past week, whatever you expected him to say, it wasn’t that. 
You figure he must be annoyed at missing out.  
A moment of silence passes and then you tilt your head. "Do you.... Want a demonstration?" You ask curiously. 
Reigen glances away for a second, blatantly imagining the scenario in his mind. His eyebrows raise at whatever he's considering.
"I mean…. I might….?" He says finally, meeting your gaze again. 
There's a slightly hopeful look in his eyes and despite your shock at his interest, you bite down on an excited smile and shift on the bench to straddle the wood, facing him properly. 
His ability to charm you even at his most useless is quite something, you think, and you reach into the space between you both and pluck the dwindling cigarette from his lips.
Reigen makes a soft noise of interest and watches you stub it out in the ashtray. 
"Face me." You instruct him, gesturing with a finger to show him where you want him. 
Reigen does as he's told, a slave to your command in his drunken stupor, and swivels in his seat until his knees bump yours. He's so close that you can feel his body heat through your clothes and it makes you want to crawl inside his suit and stay there forever. 
"Put your hands on my waist." 
Reigen nods, swallowing thickly. "Yes ma'am." 
Something hot curls up inside you at his address. You hadn't ever imagined he might be the type to enjoy being bossed around, but you're very happy to work with it.
His warm hands take up your waist and once he's settled, you take a hold of his tie again and slowly ease him down, lower and lower, until you're half an inch from his face.
Reigen's breath smells like the sugary cocktails he's been knocking back all night and fresh cigarette smoke; you'd usually balk at such a scent, but something about it is distinctly.... Him. 
After months of yearning from afar, months of silent longing, you finally kiss him. 
Reigen's eyes flutter shut as your lips connect.  The tip of his nose is cold as it brushes your cheekbone, but his lips are warm and welcoming, and they part just enough for you to taste him.
Reigen gives a soft groan and leans forward a little more, pressing up as close as he can manage without dragging you into his lap. His hands tighten on your waist and he exhales through his nose, shaky and slow.
The kiss lasts for barely a few seconds. 
It's intended to be short and sweet, and then Reigen is dragging you closer again, chasing your mouth as Serizawa had barely an hour before, yet with far more need. His desperation to keep going is oddly attractive. 
This time, you risk the chance of overwhelming your subject. 
Reigen wants more and you're perfectly willing to give it to him. 
You lap at the seam of his lips until he parts them, slowly pressing your tongue to his. Reigen is clumsy and inexperienced, not as naturally graceful as Serizawa, but you do your best to guide him through, turning your head to accommodate him and deepening the kiss whilst he sighs and keens into your touch. 
One of his hands comes up from your waist to hold the side of your face, his thumb running along your cheekbone, while his other finds your thigh. 
Reigen works his fingers along the hem of your skirt until they just slip underneath the edge of the fabric, kneading the flesh there absentmindedly as he lets himself fall into you more.
You’re so caught up in the moment, all too happy to let him continue, that when the bar door swings open with a loud bang you almost jump out of your skin. It's an immediate reminder that you're still in public and the interruption is enough to make you pull away before things become even more heated.
Sitting back and attempting to catch your breath, you quickly glance over Reigen’s shoulder to check that no other patrons have caught the two of you in a compromising situation. Whoever it is doesn't seem to be interested in your activities, too busy clamouring with their friend about taxis and food as they leave.
When you turn back, Reigen looks like he's going to pass out; he's bright red but completely pale at the same time, breathing heavily and staring right through you.
Alarmed, you sit up straighter. "Are you-?" 
"I'm gonna be sick." Reigen chokes out, scrambling up from his seat like a fawn on ice.
You flinch away as he rushes to a bin on the far side of the smoking area. He barely makes it in time to vomit up whatever overpriced drinks he's had tonight, hunched over the top of the can as he coughs and splutters.
Gross as it is, you feel a bit bad for him. His hands are shaking where they clutch the edge of the bin and you go to his side, rubbing circles on his back while he gags. You smooth his hair back from his sweaty forehead and reach over to lift his tie and stop it from dangling into the unpleasant stream until he's done throwing up for all he’s worth. 
"Fuck." He gasps into the trash can, breathless and humiliated. "Fuck. I'm so sorry." 
After a few more minutes of retching, Reigen manages to choke out another weak apology and straightens up, wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his jacket. He looks terrible; his hair is ruffled and his eyes are glazed, and you hate how sorry you feel for him. It’s horribly gross and if it was anyone else you’d have left them to suffer alone. Yet your empathy for Reigen seems to know no bounds. 
"Don't mention it." You say with a smile, smoothing his hair back. "Do you feel better, at least?" 
Reigen nods a little, sorry for himself. 
"That'll teach you for drinking on an empty stomach." You tease. "Make sure you remember that the sick part was your fault." 
Reigen flushes again and ducks his head, bashful. His colour is slowly returning and he looks less nauseated than he had.
A beat of awkward silence passes, filled only by the general chatter of the patrons leaving the bar behind you both, and Reigen clears his throat.
“Listen” he sighs, toeing the concrete with the edge of his shoe. “I’m sorry about just walking out earlier.”
You tilt your head a little, waiting for him to elaborate. 
"I didn't mean to get weird about it." He admits, still unable to meet your eyes. "I just…. The kiss…. I wanted it to be me, y’know?”
“What?” You say with a tiny, disbelieving laugh. “You’ve been ignoring me all week, I thought you hated me! I mean, for a second there, I thought you were gonna fire me for-”
“Fire you?!” Reigen says, a little too loudly. “Fuck, no! Never!”
“Then why have you been avoiding m-?”
"Because you're so pretty!" he interrupts, like it pains and infuriates him. "Ever since you started working here, I've barely been able to stop myself from-”
Reigen cuts himself off with a growl of frustration.
“Not to mention that stupid outfit, wearing it in the office like you didn’t know what you were doing! You're so- It's so- Fuck." Reigen takes a deep breath and then plows on, using his opportunity to spill his guts in a much more metaphorical way this time. 
"I had to avoid you last week, you keep wearing that little fucking skirt and it’s driving me nuts!" He groans. "I don't hate you, I just can't stop thinking about what you'd look like with it 'round your ankles." 
Your knees feel weak at his admission.
"Yeah?" You breathe, biting down on your lip. 
"Yeah!" Reigen says, visibly distressed and breathing hard. "And I know I'm your boss, and I know that's weird, and I really, really don’t want to get sued for harassment but I-!" 
“Reigen!” 
He’s working himself up and the last thing you want is for him to throw up again, so you clamp your hands on his face until he stops sucking in air like a dying fish and shuts up. 
“Take a breath.” You say, laughing.
Reigen swallows thickly and breathes in, then out. 
“I assumed you just wanted a kiss because you were jealous he got one.” With his face still between your hands, you nod back towards the building in reference to Serizawa, and Reigen shrugs. 
“I mean, yeah, that too.” He mutters, pouting a bit. 
You can’t hold back the surprised laughter that spills from your throat. This entire time you had  assumed he had absolutely no interest in you at all beyond being friends. You thought yourself alone in your longing, lonely in the assumption and upset by the notion that he’d rather move somewhere else than tolerate your presence. The avoidance, the grouchiness, the comments; none of it suggested to you that he felt any other way. 
You can’t quite believe your luck.
Reigen must misconstrue your silence for rejection because he starts to back off, reaching up to extricate himself from your grip, and you’re forced to clamp your hands down around his face to keep him still. 
“Why didn’t you bring it up?” You ask, ignoring the confused look on his face.
“What was I gonna say; ‘Look, I know I’m your superior but I think you’re really hot and kind and sweet, you wanna get dinner sometime’?.” He scoffs, as though it’s a ridiculous notion. 
“Reigen,” You grin. “I’d love to. That wasn’t so hard, was it?” 
Reigen’s brows disappear under his fringe and his mouth opens and closes as he flounders for something to say, stunned at your response. 
“What?” He manages to choke out.
“I would love to get dinner with you.” You giggle. 
Reigen breathes a laugh, the biggest grin you’ve ever seen splitting his face in half, and he nods quickly. “You would? I can do that. Anywhere you want.” 
You join him in relieved laughter and loop your arms around his neck, tugging him closer until your bodies are pressed flush together. It feels so good to have him close like this. 
Reigen wraps his arms around your waist in response, his big hands wandering from your sides to the small of your back. 
“And if it helps,” You smirk, tugging gently on the back of his hair. “I’d also love for you to see me with my skirt around my ankles….”
Reigen groans softly. His eyes fall shut for a moment and when he opens them again, something hot lurks in his gaze.
“Oh yeah?” He murmurs, looking down to your mouth.
You can tell he wants to turn this into a new game and as much as you’d like to indulge him,  you’re acutely aware that only moments ago he was puking into a public bin. 
“If you’re waiting for another kiss,” you smirk, biting your lower lip. “You better go brush your teeth.”
Reigen releases you so quickly that you almost fall over with a yelp. He swiftly ducks under the rope that seals off the smoking area and starts to jog towards the lit up rows of shops down the street. 
“Stay here!” He yells over his shoulder. “The konbini doesn’t shut ‘til one! I’ll be right back!”
“Where are you going?!” You shout after his retreating form.
“Toothpaste!” Reigen says, turning around to throw you a wink. 
You can do nothing except laugh as you watch him leg it towards the closest convenience store.
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ultralightpoe · 1 year
Text
Rule Number Two- Jake Seresin
Authors Note: Hey how you doing let me whisper in your ear
Warning: Smut, jackass ex
Word Count: 2443
PART ONE HERE 
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Enjoy!
It has been a month since Jake Seresin ruined his own life. 
He didn’t crash his car, or one of the jets, nor did he lose his job. He didn’t dye his hair or ruin his favorite shirt. He managed to ruin his own life by walking out on the one he loved the most. 
It was kinda comedic if you think about it. The way he craved your every touch and craved to be near you just to get that stripped away because you offered him more and he was too much of a coward. God, he wished he could go back to that moment  and kiss you as hard as he could and never let you go. 
He often imagined what it would have been like if he had, how he would spend his days texting you and getting cute little selfies from you at work. Or he would actually spend the night at your place, watching the sun come up as you slept in, allowing him time to make you breakfast. He would make you breakfast every morning until he figured out what kind of breakfast person you were, he suspected french toast. 
“Hangman, on your 4!” Coyote calls, snapping him back attention until they both circle each other and speed off to catch Maverick. 
“Come on, Bagman,” Maverick teases, “Get your head out of the clouds and focus on me. I want an actual opponent.”
“Bagman is focused on what ring he wants to get the girl.” Coyote snips, laughing when Jake flips him off. 
—----------------------------
It was a bad habit, but after a stressful day Jake would walk to your apartment building, trying to get up the nerve to talk to you. 
He wasn’t stalking you, he had every intention of walking up to your door and telling you how much he misses you and how desperate he is to see you, but nearly every time he was three steps away he remembered how you couldn’t look at him as he dropped the napkin. He remembers the embarrassment as he left. 
Today, however, was going to be the day. He was gonna get his girl. 
He was still in uniform when he left base, driving the route he knew by heart, and nodding to everyone who thanked him as he passed them while walking the block to your place. He counted the steps, feeling his heart hammer in his chest as he fixed his hair, smiling at an older lady who thanked him for his service before he rounded the corner to see you. 
But he stops when he sees another man there. Skinny, shaggy hair, professor vibe. The guy looks anxious, clutching on to the bundle of white roses tightly as his foot taps harshly on the floor beneath him, his overly expensive shoes making a drum sound on the concrete. 
Jake is about to ask him who he was when you open the door, a look of shock written on your features as Jake hides behind the wall and listens. 
“Thomas….” You sound hesitant and since this is the first time Jake has heard your voice in weeks his chest aches just at the tone. “I didn’t know you were co-”
“I miss you Y/n. I miss you so fucking much.” Thomas interrupts, his voice cracking. “I swear I will never do it again.”
“Thomas I’m a little busy.”
“Five minutes. Y/n I’m begging you baby. Give me five fucking minutes.” Baby. The nickname itself made him want to puke. You weren't a baby or babe. You were sugar, or honey, or your personal favorite had always been Sweetheart but that always came out when you were in a very heated moment. Who the fuck was this guy?
“You can come in.” You sigh and Jake wants to scream, the sound of the door closes and before he can think of it he punches the bricks behind him. Pain travels up his hands and he grunts out, storming out of the building. 
—--------------
“Who has bricks INSIDE a building?!” Jake snaps, watching Bradley and Natasha laugh at him as embarrassment clings to his every being. 
“Who punches a brick wall?” Bradley counters, shaking his head. “What was going through your head?”
“Y/n, and how much he loves her.” Javy, Coyote, laughs while punching his shoulder. Jake just shrugged him off and kept walking to the club they were all heading to, not really waiting for them to catch up. 
“You said that I should tell her how I felt Rooster.” He defends. “And I was planning on doing just that, but then he was there.”
“Yeah yeah, then you punched the wall.” He laughs, pulling him into the club. “Just…. Don’t get shitfaced-”
“I won’t.”
—----------------
You were shitfaced, a feeling you enjoyed very much. 
It had been a very stressful day, between you trying not to pretend Jake Seresin was a thorn in your heart and mind and your ex Thomas showing up with the ugliest flowers you had ever seen and begging for your love back, well……you were just so tired. 
So you conceited when Amy invited you out, wearing one of her dresses and pretending that the heels weren’t actually killing you. The alcohol was making it a bit better, or maybe you just couldn’t tell anymore. 
“Hey!” Amy croons when she sees you, excitement lighting up her face. “I KNOW YOU!”
“Yeah! You brought me here!” You giggle, dancing beside her. “Where did the others go?”
“Bathroom…. Or the bar.” She laughs spinning you around, right into a random chest. Both of you gasp in shock as Amy moves on to dance with another guy, meanwhile you look up to see Thomas glaring down at you.
“Thomas?” You snap, moving to step back but he grabs your wrists tightly. 
“I have been looking everywhere for you.” He snaps and you look around to find Amy, only to see her a few steps off completely in her own world. If you called out she wouldn’t hear you above the music. 
“I already said everything I wanted to say-”
“You didn’t give me an actual chance to explain.” He snaps, and you look around for an escape. Then you see him, the man that has been haunting your every second for the last month. Standing by the bar, with one hand gripping a beer and the other spread out before him as he inspects it. 
“Okay. Okay.” You concede, nodding to Thomas. Everytime you made eye contact you were brought back to the moment you were left sobbing on the living room floor holding the cheek he had punched. But instead of sobbing this time you put on the best flirt face and smiled. “Buy me a drink?”
He smiles, excited that he was gonna get his way. “Lead the way.”
So you did. You slipped from his touch and walked to the bar, right where Jake was standing with a frown. He saw you a few steps away and his spine shot straight up, you saw him reach out a bruised hand for you. 
“Oh Jake!” You smile, right as Thomas storms up behind you. Jake's face falls for a moment and he looks like he wants to walk away but you reach for his chest lightly. “Jake! Jake, I am so excited. I really want to introduce you to-”
“Thomas.” He cuts you off, reaching past you to shake Jake's hand. You send Jake a pleading look while Thomas is behind you, and he seems to catch on, brows creasing together. 
“Lieutenant Jake Seresin, Top Gun Naval Aviator.” You would be lying if you said that you weren’t affected by that. Suddenly you wanted to jump on him here and now. 
“That’s….that’s cool I guess?” Thomas snickers, tapping your shoulder. “What do you want?”
“Surprise me.” You smile, watching him nod and turn to the bar as you snatch Jake’s elbow and  pull him a couple steps away. 
“Thomas?” He asks, one hand gripping your waist. You lean in to hear him over the music, blushing a bit when he bends down to hear you as well. 
“Thomas.” You nod, casting a look to where Thomas was arguing with the bartender. “Six year relationship Thomas.”
“Wasted time.” He smiles, remembering your words from the last night he saw you. “Still wasting your time?”
“Indeed-” You answer right before a bright colored drink is put right under your nose. 
Jake’s jaw tenses as he steps back but keeps his hand on your waist. “Do you mind? I was trying to talk to her.”
Thomas narrows his eyes and stands straighter. “Funny, so was I.” 
Jake glares as Thomas puts a hand over your shoulder, and moves to flick it off. “Hands off my girl.”
“Get your hands off MY girl.” Thomas snaps, slapping Jake's hand off your waist. You panic for a moment and step into Jake, who immediately wraps an arm around you. 
“Y/n? Sugar?” He asks, looking down at you as you wrap an arm around his stomach and smile. “Think it’s time to get home?”
“I think so.” You smile, moving to walk before Thomas steps in front of you. You barely had time to blink before Jake had his fist smashing into his face, pulling the attention of many people in the bar. “Okay, it’s definitely time to go.”
—---------------------
You pull him out of club, and Jake can’t seem to process how fucking lucky he was. Not only was he standing with you, an arm wrapped around you, he had also gotten to punch that waste of space with the unkept beard. 
“How did you get here?” He asks, watching you cringe the second your feet his the concrete sidewalk. He, without even thinking, reaches down to grab your ankle and undo the heel.
“Amy- I can’t walk barefoot.” You mumble, trying to keep the shoe on but he doesn't concede and snatches it off. 
“Come on, I got ya Sugar.” He smiles, standing up and tossing you over his shoulder. His chest tightens as you laugh, gripping the back of his shirt while he reaches into his pocket for his car keys. “You gonna tell me about Thomas?”
“You gonna run out the door again?” You snap and then a second later you laugh and something tightens in his chest again. 
“Alright, watch your head.” He mumbles, setting you in his car as you keep giggling. “You laughin’ at me?”
He’s just teasing, to be honest he would rather you laugh at him then hate him, would rather you laugh at him for the rest of his life then not see you.
“No, I am laughing at myself.” You answer, leaning forward to touch his eyebrow while he buckles you in. “Cause I should have just kept my mouth shut.”
“No, you shouldn’t have. I should have been braver.” He sighs, leaning forward to kiss your forehead. “Lean back, close your eyes.”
—-------------
You wake up to the smell of something cooking in the kitchen, your head pounding as you struggle to sit up. You had been changed out of the uncomfortable dress into a baggy set of pajamas and tucked into your blankets tightly.  “How the hell did I-”
Then you remember Jake tucking you in, shaking his head as you kissed his face repeatedly and trying to get you to go to bed. ‘Goodnight, I love you’
You had to have imagined that part, but as you climbed out of the bed and padded along the floor while rubbing your eyes, stopping dead in your tracks as you see Jake shuffling around in your kitchen still in last night's clothes. 
“You’re still here?” You are stunned, mouth agape as you stare at him. 
“Yeah… And I’m hoping you like french toast.” He blushes, casting a look to where you were sitting on the couch now. 
“I do.” You smile, curling up. He stares for a moment before taking a second and walking over to sit in front of you. 
“I…. well… uhm good morning.” He mumbles, trying to fix his hair nervously. “I wanted to start by saying I’m a coward.”
You wait, crossing your legs as you stare at him. “Do you remember what you said to me the first night we met?”
“No?” 
“You’re hot, and I’m Y/n….lets make babies.” You had laughed, leaning in closer. “But I’m not looking for a long time thing, just a short fling.”
“I said that?” You laughed. “A little blunt.”
“You said that you had just gotten out of a relationship and you didn’t want to waste anymore time.” He explains, bumping your knee. “And for the first time in my entire history I couldn’t breathe and couldn’t let you leave. So I played it up, I wrote this stupid rule. I was making it seem like I wasn’t desperate to be near you.”
You couldn’t breathe, desperate to touch him. 
“For weeks I was trying to play it cool and then suddenly you were telling everything I wanted to hear. And I panicked. Running like an absolute coward.”
“You did run out of here kinda fast.” You mumble, watching as he leans closer. 
“I propose a new rule.” He whispers and you watch as he pulls out a napkin, handing it to you. 
‘RULE NUMBER TWO; Make breakfast together every morning.”
“What does this mean?” You ask, clutching it. 
“It means I want to spend every morning with you.” He smiles, “making silly rules and loving you.”
“I think I can allow that.”
—-------------------------
Desperate moans filled the house as Jake laughed from his spot above you, sweating and smug.  Your husband loved torturing you on the mornings he had off, over and over.
“You’re….. Not being fair-” You mewl, pulling him closer as he nips at your jaw. 
“Nuh uh.” He laughs, thrusting forward again, trying to get deeper. “This is completely fair. You broke rule number six.”
Rule number six (written on a sticky note stolen from the doctors office during his monthly check up for top gun) ; never go to bed angry at the other. 
“You… It was your fault!”
“How so?” He cackles, biting down on your lip. 
“Rule number fifteen, never get hurt at work.”
“I never agreed to that rule-”
“You make me follow it!”
“You are my wife. Of course I make you follow it. Now…..” He has a smug look in his eye that makes you nervous. “Apologize for going to bed mad at me and I’ll give you everything you want.”
“You’ll finish me?”
“Promise.”
“French toast?”
“Swear it.” He knew you liked french toast.
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Text
Fix You - Chapter 16 - Genesis
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Pairing: Frankie “Catfish” Morales x Fem!Reader
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Read on A03
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Chapter Summary: 🤷‍♀️
Word Count: 4K
Rating: Explicit
Chapter Warnings: cussing, graphic violence, mentions of sex. I'm not giving more warnings than that, sorry.
A/N: Hey all. First I want to say I'm sorry. I literally had no time or motivation to write this. I'm gonna be honest, this is a really tough chapter, and it was hard to get in this headspace. Suffering a recent heartbreak, things in this chapter are things I have thought also, and so it was really hard for me to voluntarily want to address that. I also started working in veterinary medicine, i do not have the spare time that I used to. We also recently adopted a puppy who we named Bucky! And if you read my earlier posts, you know that I was SA'd last January. All that to say, sorry I couldn't do this faster.
Also want to wish a happy birthday to @musings-of-a-rose, my beloved, my bestie, and my constant support. This is for you. Sorry it's not a happier chapter....
* If a character is speaking fully in Spanish, I will put “[ ]” around the dialogue. I speak pretty decent Spanish but not good enough for this
Suggested Songs: "Exile" Taylor Swift feat. Bon Iver, "I Love You" Billie Eilish, "Vampire" and "Logical" by Olivia Rodrigo, "The Night We Met" by Lord Huron and Phoebe Bridgers, "Genesis" by Grimes
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You didn’t even flinch at the landing, which was rough, so that’s saying a lot. When the janky cargo door (which looked like at any time during the flight would be ripped right off) opens, you barely even lift your eyes from the floor. You felt heavy and hollow, somewhere suspended in between shock and just not giving a fuck anymore. The only thing you could still fell was the pinching in your heart. It was still broken.
At some point during the journey, the co-pilot had taken pity on you and untied your arms from behind your back and bound them in front of you instead. You hadn’t struggled. There was no point. Where would you go? Jump in the ocean? You weren’t that great of a swimmer and you loved sharks and everything but the open ocean is not where you are supposed to be.
You have no sense of space and time, so you have no actual clue where you are other than not the mainland. You’re dehydrated as fuck, groggy, your vision’s blurry and you’d figured out the sticky moisture on your face was your own blood. 
Because when you had suddenly blacked out it was because they’d hit you, and had absolutely no hesitation doing so. They did not care about you, they did not see you as a human being, they didn’t even bother strapping you into a seat so you had been sliding around the cargo bay the entire flight, bumping into everything. You were in deep danger, any hope that you would have some ransom protection had pretty much disintegrated. You had hoped that the boys wouldn’t come for you at first. Then you had hoped that they would, because if you’re ransom, even if at the very least you’d be alive until then, right? But “alive” doesn’t mean unharmed.
A shadow looms over you and it finally makes you look up, squinting to adjust your eyes to something so close, as well as the brightness of the sun. It feels like it takes you 10 whole minutes to process that you were being spoken to in English.
“Eh!” The man leaning over you snips, and when you simply blink in confusion and don’t answer, he slaps you lightly on both cheeks. You’re stunned enough to finally look at him, his oval face, beady eyes and unique sideburns seeming so familiar to you but quite frankly you wouldn’t trust yourself with recognizing even your dad at the moment, so you push that thought aside.
He kneels down in front of you. “You listen to me. We don’t want you. We want the money. This means if you don’t fucking piss me off, I might be nice and not kill you, you understand? Be a smart little girl, eh?.”
You nod, you probably should be feeling some sort of panic setting in but you don’t. Whatever. Who even cares anymore.
He takes your silence as submission. “Bueno.” He whispers, leaning down and grabbing you by the arm, lifting you until you are back on your feet. He tilts his head and steps to the side, revealing 5 additional men with AKs pointed straight at you. From behind, you feel the sharp tip of another poking your back, urging you forward and down the precarious ramp. The pilots.
You didn’t trust that they wouldn’t hurt you, but you knew you had no other choice. Trying to fight was asking for it, and once you step out of the hold and realize you were in the fucking jungle, there would be no sensical place to go even if you did get away.
You step out of the plane onto a rickety steel ramp that bounces as the footpad of your sandals touches it and shuffle slowly down it. You feel suffocated sandwiched between four men, your hands chafe where they are tied and you have been in the same positions for so long your whole body is sore. Every touch and movement hurt.
You stumble as the ramp ends but one of the men grabs your arm and yanks you so you don’t fall. It wasn’t kindness. It was a way to hurt you that he could get away with. The tiny dirt landing strip is almost canopied completely by the jungle trees, leaving large patches here and there where the plane flew through, not noticeable from far above. It looks like you’re walking to nothing, just a dirt road that ends right into the thick middle of the jungle, but you don’t stop at the edge. You push through.
It’s hot as shit and you felt sweat buildup in every crevice of your body, your thighs are rubbing raw from your asinine decision to wear short shorts to the fair, and you could feel a heat rash growing under your tits that you couldn’t even scratch because your hands are bound.
You walk for forever. You walk until the friction rash on your inner thighs turn to lesions. You haven't drank water in almost 48 hours and it feels like 150 degrees out, with full humidity. You’ve had to stop twice already to vomit from heat exhaustion and you still occasionally gag even though there’s nothing in your stomach to come up anymore. All the years that you did not appeal to insects are making up for it now, they’re all over you and you can’t walk 3 steps without one getting in your eye.  The jungle gets tighter and you can’t breathe because it’s pushing in on you almost as tight as the hands on your shoulders pushing you forward..
You start crying. At least, that is what you tell yourself as you whimper and sob as quietly as you can. You know you’re strong, but this is just beyond reason that any normal person could take. And when you think about how this is probably what life was all the time in Delta for the boys, you cry even harder because you feel guilty, that you have no right to complain.
Finally, after what feels like forever, the tightness of the jungle seems to loosen. More open. You notice some of the trees look more oddly arranged than others. As you get closer you realize they aren’t trees at all, but tents and dilapidated buildings built into the shadows of the trees.  The huge roots and overhanging canopy of the jungle transformed a bustling camp into what looks like a little village. At the entrance, a line of guards in jungle fatigues that were impossible to detect until you got right up to them. You hear someone speak above you, alerting you to a man up in the trees on a platform tucked between the branches. There was another in the tree on the opposite side. He calls to the man with the sideburns, saying something in Spanish you can’t interpret fast enough, but it’s jovial and they laugh, and it makes you feel like you’re going to go mentally insane. 
It’s like it’s not even serious to them. And it’s so serious to you.
You are pushed through the camp quickly, but not quick enough that you don’t see the insane amount of cocaine packages piled up in the makeshift buildings, sheds, and tents toward the back. Men were milling about checking them, moving them and glaring at you as you walked past.
You continue past the main camp, crossing over a bustling creek whose bridge was literally just planks of wood, but you noticed there were tire marks across them so you felt at least safe it could handle a car’s weight. Across the creek, an old stonework manor stood. You can tell at one time it must have been glorious, but the white stone-worked walls were dirty and crumbling in many places, the fountains out front had dried crusty palm fronds and dirt in them and looked like they hadn’t sprayed water since the 1980s.
It was still oddly beautiful. You thought about how this house came to be, what it might have looked like when it had been first built. A beautiful Caribbean sea mansion. A jungle that hadn’t closed in on it yet. Fountains spraying and colorful birds resting on the rooftops. But then you  realize that this place has probably always been used for what it is now. Someone like Carl Lehder probably lived here and ran an entire cartel within this very jungle. Maybe it was the same one, just run by someone else.
There was a shabbily made shack to the left of the manor with padlocks, piles of debris piled next to the door. You assume that’s where you would be taken, but you were instead led up the stairs to the manor proper. And as your eyes focus in on the ground while you were being guided to the mansion instead, you realize the heap of matter by the shack that you thought was some dying plantation was actually a crumpled human body. A boy looking not much older than 17, shot execution style in the head and left to rot.
Then smell hits you, your knees buckle and you vomit on the stonework stairs, a scream of shock and realization pierces the jungle, making the nearby tropical birds explode from the treetops. When the sicarios pick you up and carry you through the mansion door, you’re still screaming.
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Eventually whoever was carrying you became fed up, and simply dropped you at the bottom of the stairs and dragged you up backwards by the armpits instead. You didn’t even feel the step edges hitting the small of your back all the way up, but you would later. 
You were tossed stricken and shivering on a disgusting, top-sheeted mattress on the floor in the corner of a room, your feet still bound together and your rope-bound hands looped through a radiator that was long enough only for you to lie down or shuffle over to a bucket for your business. Everything stank and you still had vomit on your chin so you curled up in a ball and slammed your eyes closed, hoping that in time the voices and smells and fear would give way to just simple numbness. You didn’t hear a female voice speaking to you for several seconds.
Your eyes snap open, skin pulled taut from dried unwiped tears,and you jolt upright to look in the direction of the voice. A woman who wasn’t even tied up was propped up against the adjoining wall, and as you take in her condition you could understand why they hadn’t even bothered. She wouldn’t have been able to run.
Her legs look..wrong, splaying at angles that shouldn’t be possible. They look like they could be broken, but you can’t tell for sure because she was wearing jeans that cover up most of her skin. The jeans were ripped in some places and stained with dark blood spots, the color turning brighter wherever her skin shows through the tears in the fabric. She’s missing several fingers on her left hand that had been burnt at the ends to cauterize, and her face was black and blue, swollen and smeared with more blood that seemed to be coming from her scalp somewhere. Her lips are pale and cracking and her eyes are glazed over and barely open. When she speaks, she already sounds like she is dead. 
She swallows and winces slightly in pain, then licks her cracked pale lips.“Is…my…her–my brother. Did you see him? Out there?” 
Your face scrunches in confusion, which actually hurts a little and you’re not sure from what specifically. Perhaps you look just as bad as the other girl. “Your–I—I don’t understand.”
She’s too exhausted to even be annoyed with you. “My brother. They took him from me days ago. They do not talk to me anymore. They don’t—need me anymore.” A single tear falls down her swollen cheek and you suddenly feel so much connection with this woman and how  incredibly fucking strong she is. Her eyes roll over to you, meeting yours for the first time. There are burst blood vessels in them. 
“I think that they killed him.”
Your lips part and you utter a shuddering breath as you connect the dots. There’s no point in sugar-coating it. You nod slowly. “I think so. But it’s not…recent.” You look away as her eyes slowly close, the additional tears she was holding back finally spilling over and cascading down her cheeks. 
“Bueno.” She says. “Then at least he is not suffering like me.” 
You both fall quiet and you look over her again. Her pants aren’t completely done up and her t shirt is ripped at the neckline, exposing a gashed shoulder. Almost like…
You start crying again, and you feel even worse about it this time because you have in front of you a woman who has been through much worse and is somehow NOT crying. You curl tighter into yourself to try and hide. 
But she simply asks. “Who are you?”
You swallow, raising your head up off your arms, quickly wiping the access tears off on your sleeve. It’s incredible how adrenaline and fear can sometimes make you the most clear-headed you’ve ever been. Your thoughts are swirling but you knew one thing for damn sure, if they didn’t know your name yet, you weren’t going to say it now. 
If I look forward I am lost. Focus on right now. Nothing else. It’s my best chance.
You know enough about trauma that compartmentalizing this moment is your best chance. You can’t think what will happen if you don’t escape, if you aren’t found, if they never come for you. You need to stay focused. You need to keep hope alive. You need to stay coherent, because if a chance pops up, you need to be able to think quickly.
“I’m no one.” You mumble. “Just happened to be dating the wrong person.”
She sniffs and looks away, but it’s muffled because her nose sounds congested. You don’t miss her tone though. “Mmmm. His new one then.”
You blink. “What?”
Her glazed over, discolored eyes snap back to yours. “Pope.” She spits. “Your man. Santia—”
“NO!” You cut her off with a shout, you know there is a guy who is in the area and you still don’t know how much these men do or do not know. “Don’t. Don’t give them names if they don’t already know it.”
“I don’t give a shit about Agent Garcia, or his friends, or anyone else, it’s their fault I am here and it’s their fault my brother is dead and..” She finally, finally starts to cry. “I told him I didn’t want to do it. They said they would let us go if we gave them what they wanted.”
“It was you.” You exhale with a shuddering breath. “They found us cause of you. You told them.” You shake your head, and for some reason you feel betrayed by this woman even though you’ve never met her.  “How could you?” 
“Because all I care about is my brother, do you understand?! I wish I’d never met him, Garcia, we would have just snuck away and no one would never seen us, but no, instead we listened to him and helped them steal from fucking Lorea, and now they found us and I knew they would, and YES, I gave them EVERYTHING because they said they’d let us go so long as they found you and–”
“Eh!” A voice trails in with a watchman you knew was hanging out somewhere in the hallway beyond. He slips through the doorway, a smaller man you were not expecting from that voice, and leans against the deteriorating door frame. He crosses his arms and his legs and it makes the handgun on his hip jut out prominently from his skinny hips. “No talking to each other.” His voice is silky and the words all slide together so it sounds like ‘no talkintoeeachother.’
You shrink back into the dirty wall behind you as your associate spits a bloody phlegm ball in the man’s direction. “FUCK you!” She snarls, a tirade of cuss words in Spanish flying from her lips. 
A loud pop almost bursts your eardrums and your heart and you exclaim in terror as your associate is shot point blank in the head, her back slumping against the wall and her head hitting with a bang, pieces of blood and brain tissue spraying over the back wall with pieces flying in your direction.  
The man remains completely motionless with his arms still raised before huffing a laugh to himself, putting the gun back on his hip, and looking at you with the such an unaffected gaze it leaves you feeling dizzy and you scream and scream and scream yourself hoarse, crumpling onto your mattress in a terrified heap, arms over your head, sobbing hysterically.
A gentle but firm palm wraps around your forearm, yanking you back up to a seated position. You look away, but the man’s other hand takes you gently by the jaw and makes you look at him. And just behind him, the woman slumped in a pool of blood and brain matter. You try to wriggle out of his grip but he tightens ever so slightly, and you can’t help but notice how different it is when Frankie would grab you like that versus this man. Frankie held you the same, sometimes harder, but you had trusted his domination and his care of you and because of that, it made it arousing. That same motion with this man has you more scared than you ever have been in your life. 
“Bebita.” He coos, thumb lightly caressing your jaw. He wipes at a small speck of blood you don’t know is even there. You can feel yourself shaking and breathing so fast you can see his half waxed back tousled locks that hang past his temples are blowing in its breeze. You can’t answer him. “Look at me.”
You do. His eyes are a dark, almost black chocolate brown, shape mismatched, a scruffy beard and goatee and thin lips. In another world you would find him devastatingly attractive and the fact that you do makes you feel absolutely violated and disgusted with yourself. 
“Do not cry.” He continues. “You have no reason to if you behave, si? You be good and you listen and I will keep you safe you understand? Well, at least for now.” He shifts closer to you, you can smell his breath. It smells like orange and cloves. “There are a lot of men here Bebita. I am sure you understand what this means, si? Answer me.”
“Yes.” A final fat tear spills from one of your eyes, and it stings as it mixes with your sweat and the raw skin around your eyes. 
He juts his head in the other woman’s direction. “This one, she fight the whole time. I like a easy job. Make my job easy, I make sure you always deal with me. Do not make me call in the other guys, they are not as nice. Understand?”
“Yes.”
“Good.” He releases your chin and you scoot back quickly as he saunters over to the other woman’s bloody body, grabs it by the arm, and casually drags her as dismissively as possible out the door and out of your sight, leaving a bloody trail behind.
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At first you just sit there in a slump staring at the opposite wall,, you don’t know for how long. Probably hours. Maybe days. The man, whose name you figured out from when he spoke to someone else in the hall, is Angel. Sometimes he would sit up and watch you, as if figuring you out, your body and the way you shift and switch positions when you are uncomfortable, what it looked like when you were crying and trying to keep quiet and unnoticed. But most of the time he ignored you. Occasionally others would come into the room and either speak to him or approach you, but upon noticing Angel watching them they would hiss or spit a curse and slink off.
The room reminded you of those old houses from the 70s that had those drafty unfinished basements that were simply concrete floors, painted stucco or white brick. To the sicarios, it served as an overflow area, there was a rotting desk along the side wall with a metal folding chair and piles of scattered papers and random household tools on them. Against the opposite side wall was a pretty nice tv, considering, which was always playing soccer. Angel seemed to make that his home base, his lithe frame sprawled across a grandma-fabric sofa, head resting on one of the puffy arm rests. He binge-smoked cigarettes and his right hand was always stretched over his head resting against his forehead in the direction of to an end table with an massive overflowing porcelain ashtray on it. You didn’t used to mind the smell of cigarettes too much but now it makes you feel sick.
You’re ashamed of how little you actually think about your current situation and like the hopeless romantic idiot you are, mostly all you can think about is Frankie. The things he said–you knew he said mean things when he was mad, or things he didn’t mean, but isn’t there always some truth to things that are said in the heat of the moment? That was enough for you to silently spiral. You thought about every memory you had of him and how it could be viewed through the lens that Frankie just wanted to fuck you. Your self confidence was low enough it was believable, and your mind races through every instance of an older man being in a relationship with someone much younger and how of course it was predatory, and how could you not see it, that you didn’t have anything in common? It’s a tale as old as time. He just wanted to fuck you, he wanted to fuck you and dominate you, his dark desires seducing you into feeling so wanted you can’t believe you thought he loved you and didn’t see right through it. 
And his friends, well, they were all in on it weren’t they, because why would they want to hang out with someone like you either? Why would men such as that actually want to be friends with you when you have never experienced half of what they have.
Fuck him. Fuck him and his lying ass, he was a fucking loser addict and you’re pissed at yourself for even considering him. Like how lonely were you?? To choose an old man with a kid who served in an institution that represented everything you hated about this country? To be so easily blinded by pretty words and love bombs to immediately take your clothes off. Because how, if he actually loved you or even like you, could he possibly have lied about something so big?! Or bought you something nice with all that fucking drug money he stole. Not that you’d want it or expected it, but why wouldn’t you want to treat someone you love as much as he claimed to? 
How could he sit there and make up what happened to Tom like that, when you were being so coddling and trying to be a caring ear. And Benny…Pope...if they were your friends they should have told you, that’s what real friends do…
But they weren’t your friends. They were never your friends. 
And if you went the other way, and considered that it was all true, that he did love you, that they were all your friends, and that he lied to you and threw stones to hurt you and push you away, how was that any better? You couldn't even think about a future not being with him, but obviously he could. He could watch you cry and question him and not even look at you, completely ignore you, then not even think about you again. No texts, no calls. No “I’m sorry, please come back.” Silence. 
How could it be so easy for him? How can he just go about his life like you never happened? Why did you still care?
Why did you still want him? 
Why did you still love him so so much. Part of you wishes they’d get on with it and just kill you. At least then you wouldn’t have to feel this excruciating pain. You wouldn’t have to see him show up to rescue you because he has to, to have to see his fucking face and every line, crinkle, scar, the bald patch in his beard and the tousled little curls that pop out of his hat…only for him to save you and then leave again, or die and then you have the guilt of killing a man who no longer loved you.
Yea. You think you’d rather die.
You feel like you’re going to throw up again. You’d let him force his cock in your mouth as far as it could go, let him tie you up and fuck you hard enough to leave bruises you had thought of as a badge of honor. You’d let him cum on your face. You’d let him fucking cum inside you! He’d gaslit you so you actually wanted him to tie you up with zip ties—-
Your heart almost stops. You can picture how his face looked exactly when he said it.
Sometimes rope can give over time.
That’s why we always used zip ties.
You look down at your bound hands.
They’re bound with rope.
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Text
Okay but
Sex pollen with Eddie Munson?
Rating: Explicit - 18+ Only. Minors interacting with this work will be blocked.
Warnings: Not beta-read; a horticultural nightmare, smoking of jazz cigarettes, scent kink, grinding, oral sex (female receiving), handjob, piv, making out, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms
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- It’s a new batch of weed.
- Eddie tells you that he didn’t get it from his usual guy—he’s been experimenting with his own strain.
- And Eddie’s been selling for so long that you figure he knows what he’s doing.
-  “Where’d you get whatever you blended this with, anyway?”
- “I found this patch near where I sell sometimes—you know, out by the bench—”
- “Uh-huh.”
- “No clue whose it was, but I snipped off some and left a five. And—” Eddie cuts himself off to raise the paper of the preroll to his lips.
- Your stomach flips as his tongue slips along the paper. You avert your eyes as he rolls it with practiced ease. He goes on:
- “And you know what they say. If it looks like a duck and smells like a duck, then it’s some primo sticky-icky.”
- “I’m not totally sure that’s what they say.”
- “It’s what they’re gonna say when they try this,” Eddie grins.
- You sink back into the itchy fabric of his dingy little plaid couch. You watch Eddie reach into his pocket for a lighter, then raise it to the end of the spliff.
- He rolls it between his fingers, lighting the end. He does that twice more, ensuring that it’s burning before he holds it out.
- “Ladies first.”
- “You’re such a gentleman.”
- You take hold of the joint, giving it a whiff before you raise it to your lips.
- It burns as you draw it in, but not in an unpleasant way. You hold it in your lungs, eyes scanning the ceiling as you feel Eddie watching you closely.
- You push the smoke out through your nose, finally meeting Eddie’s bright, expectant eyes.
- “So?”
- “I think you might be on to something here, Munson,” You smile, passing it back to him.
- He grins, vindicated, and takes it from you to draw from it himself.
--
- It’s good for a while.
- You pass the joint back and forth, and it dwindles and dwindles.
- You don’t speak much. Eddie’s put Boston’s Third Stage cassette in his boombox. It’s not really his thing, but he knows that you enjoy it.
- You’re slouching against Eddie’s side, head resting on his shoulder when the feeling starts.
- Your body feels hot, suddenly. Your skin prickles like you’re out in the sun at high noon.
- And you feel tingly. It’s not the body-based, tingling, flowing high that you usually get when you smoke what Eddie’s given you.
- You shift against him on the hot couch, letting out a little groan, and then another as you struggle to find a comfortable position.
- “What is it?”
- “I’m...I don’t know,” You mumble. “I feel weird.”
- “Weird how?”
- “Weird like...I don’t know. Weird. Can I have a soda or something?”
- “I got yoohoo and beer.”
- “...Yoohoo.”
- Eddie pushes himself off of the couch, tenderly flicking your forehead as he passes.
- You manage to smile a bit, but you find that even without Eddie next to you, you’re boiling hot.
- You bite your lip. You can’t take your shirt off, not in front of Eddie.
- Is this some kind of allergic reaction? Or are you just being super paranoid?
- “Here.”
- You look up at the proffered yoohoo and take it with a mutter of, “Thanks.”
- You wrench the top off of it, drawing in a few greedy gulps. You lean back to take a breath, and before you can finish it, Eddie swipes it from you.
- “Hey!” You whine, watching Eddie drain the rest.
- “What? It’s hot in here,” Eddie says, “And besides, that was the last one.”
- You swallow thickly, eyes wandering Eddie’s face, and taking in the slight flush rising in his cheeks.
- “You feel hot, too?” You ask nervously.
- Eddie’s eyes widen slightly as he turns his head to face you.
- “You feel that? I thought you were just dry.”
- “What? No! I mean I am—Was, a bit, but I feel all...” You wave your hand over your body.
- “All what?”
- “Hot, and...And tingly, and...And...”
- “And what?”
- Horny. There’s a bubbling in your blood; your thighs press together as you fight back another irritated moan.
- “I dunno, just—Different,” You insist.
- Eddie bites his lip, eyes wandering you.
- “Can I help?” He asks.
- You laugh shakily, shaking your head.
- “I don’t think you can help with this.“
- “Try me.”
- You’d love to. You’ve had a nagging little crush on Eddie Munson for as long as you can remember, but he’s never been anything but a good friend to you.
- You’ve never said a thing, not wanting to jeopardize your friendship. And this could be just as dangerous on that score, if not more.
- “Don’t um—Don’t worry about it, Eddie. Can I go lie down for a bit?” You ask, jerking your thumb over your shoulder.
- “Yeah! Yeah, ‘course. Lemme know if there’s anything I can—”
- “Uh-huh!” You chirp. You’re a little shaky as you wobble off of his couch, half-tripping over your feet as you head to Eddie’s room. 
- You’ve been in there a number of times, so nothing’s unfamiliar. You find yourself trailing over to his mirror, raising your hand to tenderly slide it along the strings of his guitar.
- Then you turn, kicking your shoes off and plopping down onto his bed.
- It’s a mistake.
- Laying there is like being covered in him.
- You hesitantly turn your head, pressing your face into his pillow.
- You groan softly at the scent of his hairspray, cigarettes, deodorant, and an underlying scent that’s just—Eddie.
- Your cunt throbs needily, and you loose a nervous moan into the pillow. You squirm, thighs pressing together and making short, aborted thrusts. 
- It’s no good. If anything, it’s making this feeling far worse.
- You only have a half-second of warning, hardly registering Eddie’s footsteps before you hear, “So I’m also feeling...Different...”
- He trails off, and you think that it must be at the sight of you, wild-eyed and sweating, whimpering as you sniff his pillow.
- Your stomach twists with embarrassment, but it’s not enough to overpower the heat in your body.
- You sweep Eddie’s body for signs of discomfort, and find him hard in his jeans.
- It wells up another desperate moan, one that you barely manage to swallow.
- “Munson...It may look like a duck and smell like a duck, but something tells me that that wasn’t weed.”
--
- You should’ve left, or at least insisted that you and Eddie ride this out in separate rooms.
- You’ve made a drastically stupid mistake.
- You’ve agreed to keep an eye on one another—
- “You know, in case something starts to go south, or...Souther.”
- It was Eddie’s idea, but you hadn’t said no.
- Now, you’re sitting beside one another on his bed.
- You’re focusing desperately on where the sides of the fitted sheet are tugging from the mattress, revealing its sky-blue top.
- “You know,” Soft-spoken though he is, Eddie’s voice breaks the quiet, and seems so loud. “We could...Fix it.”
- “How? A time machine?”
- “That’s plan B.”
- “So what’s plan A?”
- “We could...Take care of it.”
- You must’ve heard wrong. You must be hearing things. Is this blend making your hallucinate?
- “Maybe that’ll back it off,” He adds.
- “It could make it worse.”
- “I don’t know how this could feel worse,” Eddie huffs softly. Then, “We could...We could help each other.”
- Your eyelids flutter at the prospect, lips paring to push out a nervous, disbelieving little huff.
- “What, like...Like your hand down my pants and my hand down—”
- “Yeah.”
- “Why not our hands down our own pants?”
- “Where’s the fun in that?”
- You look over in slight disbelief to find Eddie smiling hazily at you. You can’t help but laugh a little yourself.
- Even in your most panicked moments, Eddie manages to put you at ease.
- Your eyes drop to the swell in Eddie’s jeans, and you can’t help but draw your lower lip between your teeth.
- Then, against your better judgement, you reach down, beginning to undo your jeans.
- “Really?” Eddie asks, surprise rife in his tone. You nod hurriedly, and giggle a little as Eddie slides down a touch, scrambling to tug off his belt and undo his jeans.
- The two of you both push your pants away, leaving you in your underwear and shirts.
- You both hesitate for a moment.
- The air thrums between you, buzzing with nerves.
- You’re each eyeing one another’s laps, palms sweating, fingers twitching.
- You find yourself making the first move, lowering your fingers to trail along Eddie’s thigh.
- He mirrors the movement, smoothing his hand over yours.
- Eddie slouches down just a little bit, fingers teasing, gently urging for you to spread your thighs.
- You slide your fingers over the bulge in his boxers, a curious hum punching out of you as you feel his cock twitch beneath the fabric.
- The heat in you seems to surge. You gulp thickly before you settle your hand more firmly over his length.
- Eddie turns his hand into your shoulder with a soft sigh, his hair brushing your arm where it’s exposed by your short sleeve.
- You feel his hips shift into your hand. His hand slides between your thighs. He gives a tentative swipe over your panty-covered cunt.
- Maybe he doesn’t mean for it to, but the band of one of his rings applies pressure in just the right way, at just the right angle.
- Your hips give a little jump, and before Eddie can ask, you nod, hum an encouraging, “Mhm.”
- Eddie smooths his hand over you again, beginning to shift to tender little circles as you begin to move your hand over his cock.
- The two of you shift and sigh and hiss your pleasure quietly.
- And it feels good, but it’s not enough.
- “...Eddie?”
- “Yeah?”
- “Can you, um—” You bite back a frustrated whine when his hand goes still. “Can you touch me...Without...You know?”
- “Without what?”
- You can’t bring yourself to say it. Instead, you pull your hand from Eddie’s lap.
- You take hold of his wrist with one hand, and pull the band of your panties open with the other.
- “...Oh,” Eddie mumbles as you slide his hand inside.
- It’s instantly better. The weight and press of his rings against your puffy, wet pussy lips is just what you need.
- “Can you—Too?” Eddie manages, voice sounding tight.
- You nod, raising your hand and worming it under the band of his boxers.
- He feels hot and thick beneath your palm. You curl your fingers around him, giving him a pump in earnest.
- “Fuck,” Eddie mumbles. He turns his head back into your shoulder as the two of you begin to work one another over.
- The air feels close and hot around you. Eddie’s fingers sweep messily over your cunt, rings slipping and catching in a way that makes your hips jolt.
- You twist your wrist, thumb smoothing over his cockhead and smearing a bead of precum.
- Eddie groans roughly, turning his head back and forth against your shoulder. He nuzzles against you for just a moment before you feel the hot press and sink of his teeth.
- You shudder a laugh, tipping your head back.
- “Did you just bite me?” You mumble, letting your head loll to the side.
- Maybe he’s tipping his head up to bite you somewhere else; maybe he’s looking up to say yes, or no.
- But Eddie’s nose brushes yours, and the two of you go still.
- His eyes seem to search yours—for hesitation, or nerves.
- “...You know what else might help?” He murmurs.
- “What?”
- “If you got in my lap. Might make the contact a little more...I mean, I don’t know about you, but my wrist is starting to hurt a bit.”
- You wriggle, pushing Eddie’s hand away as you draw yours back. Eddie leans back, hands raised in apology, unsure of what you’ll do.
- You try not to notice the way his fingers and rings glisten, smeared with your juices.
- You try not to notice the way your damp panties catch and rub against your sensitive pussy.
- You just straddle Eddie’s lap and brace your hands on the wall behind his head.
- Eddie’s hands lower to rest on your hips, one sliding slickly over your skin.
- You each shift your hips at the same time, and each loose strangled little moans.
- “Fuck,” You spit over Eddie’s emphatic, “Jesus Christ—”
- You lower your head, resting your heated forehead against Eddie’s as you begin to roll your hips in tandem.
- Your jaw drops to pant as you begin to pick up speed.
- The slight press of your chest against him is maddening as your hard nipples rub against the fabric of your bra.
- “It’s still—I’m too hot,” You whine.
- “Take your shirt off.”
- He doesn’t have to tell you twice.
- You reach down, tugging your shirt up and over your head.
- The initial rush of air is calming, it gives way to heat rolling across your skin.
- “Shit,” Eddie mumbles.
- “What?” You ask worriedly, dropping your gaze to his face.
- Eddie doesn’t answer. You’re not sure he can; his gaze is locked to your bouncing chest as if he’s hypnotized.
- You feel his hands begin to sneak up your sides, hooking in the band of your bra. He gives a curious tug, his tongue sweeping across his lower lip as the tug seems to jostle your breasts further.
- “You can touch ‘em,” You offer, and shy as Eddie peers up at you, “If you want.”
- Eddie’s hands slide from the band gently, trailing over your ribs in a way that would otherwise tickle.
- He bite his lip as he palms your breasts, squeezing them through the cups of your bra.
- You groan, tipping your head back and pressing your chest into his hands.
- It’s all so good, but none of it is getting you there.
- The fabric of your panties catches against your clit, but it’s not enough.
- “Damnit, damnit,” You whimper, forcing your hips more roughly against Eddie’s.
- “What?” Eddie lifts his head to watch you, “Whadda you—Fuck—Whadda you need, what can I do?”
- “I need to take these off,” You huff. You reach down, plopping back onto the bed. You tip your hips up, squeezing your thighs together and pushing the damp fabric down your thighs.
- You huff as the wet, heated flesh is brushed by the air, and you’re set to clamber onto Eddie’s lap again, but a hand on your ankle stills you.
- You watch as Eddie shifts on the bed, folding forward and pushing your thighs further apart.
- You watch dazedly as he leans down, and suck in gasp as his breath brushes over where you’re must sensitive.
- He glances up at you for something—a warning, a fuck-off, anything.
- You just nod.
- Eddie’s lips break into a wide smile before he dives in.
- His tongue is everywhere, tracing and teasing your heated pussy.
- You let yourself sag back onto the mattress, eyes sliding closed as Eddie groans and laps at your cunt. You can feel his fingers grasping at your thighs and hips, drawing you closer, as if you could get any closer.
- And then one slips from your leg, slithering between your thighs to tease at you.
- He taps his fingertip lightly over your opening before he tenderly presses it into your cunt.
- Your pussy throbs around the intrusion. You gasp, hips pressing down against the feeling.
- Eddie turns his head for just a moment, dusting your thighs with a kiss before sinking his teeth into the meat of your thigh with a groan.
- You jump at the sharp sensation, even as Eddie presses another finger into your throbbing pussy.
- His rings brush against your opening, making your thighs twitch around his shoulders.
- You can feel the bed shifting, and you lift your head just enough to see Eddie grinding his hips against the mattress. 
- “Shit,” You breathe, letting your head fall back again. Your hands slide down, sliding through his hair and curling in his thick tresses.
- Your tugging makes Eddie groan openly. His mouth falls open, tongue lapping wetly across your plumped lips.
- You roll your hips roughly against his mouth, chasing the tugging feeling in your belly.
- You’ve been teetering on the edge for so long, and now you’re so close.
- “Yes—Fucking—God damn, Eddie, shit, shit shit shit shit—” You pant, hips rabbiting as you cum against his tongue and lips.
- Eddie groans, sucking your clit greedily and pumping his fingers roughly into you.
- You can’t help the high, reedy whine that leaves you at the stimulation. Your thighs tense, and your back arches from the bed. 
- “Eddie—Oh, fuck, goddamn—” You gasp, pushing his head back a touch.
- He gets the message, but he doesn’t get far.
- Eddie leans off of your pussy with a last lick before he turns his head.
- He nuzzles against the crease of your hip, then opens his mouth to suck and nip and tease the spot in a way that you both know will mark.
- You prop yourself up on your elbows, reaching down and sliding one of your hands over Eddie’s where it rests on your hip.
- “C’mere,” You urge.
- Eddie carefully slides his fingers from the slick clutch of your cunt, scrambling to sit up. He draws his shirt off over his head before he lowers himself down over you.
- You shiver as your chests brush together.
- You peer down between the two of you, eyeing where Eddie’s cock is hard and flushed against his belly.
- You raise a hand to your mouth, lapping broadly across your palm before you reach down.
- Eddie moans weakly, lowering his head to press his face to your neck as you take him in hand.
- You don’t have to do much; his cock is leaking like a fountain as he fucks into your fist.
- You swipe your tongue across your lips, wetting them for just a moment before you open your mouth to greedily draw in air.
- Your panting matches the push and heat of Eddie’s against your neck.
- You feel his hips shoving more harshly against your hand before he’s groaning loudly.
- His cum spills against your stomach, smearing down your fingers as you keep working your hand.
- You loosen your grip, then let go as Eddie groans, flopping onto the bed beside you.
- It’s a moment before he rolls into your side. He curls his arm around your middle, pressing his face into your shoulder.
- It takes you a moment of coming down to realize that it wasn’t enough.
- Getting off has only thrown more fuel on your fire.
- You open your mouth to ask Eddie if he’s feeling any better—but before you can say a word, you feel Eddie pressing his cock against your hip.
- You shudder, squirming on the bed.
- “You, too?” You mumble.
- “Yes. Shit.”
- You whine, sliding your hand down and resting your hand on his hip, spurring him on.
- “There’s gotta be something else we can do,” You groan.
--
- Eddie holds himself carefully up over you, arms shaking slightly as he presses his cock into your fully.
- Your pussy flutters around him. Your eyes slide shut at the feeling of his cock filling you.
- “Fuck,” You sigh.
- You shift your hips unthinkingly, and one of Eddie’s hands drops to brace against your hip.
- You blink confusedly up at him, tongue slipping over your dry lips.
- “Eddie?” You mumble.
- “Just...Gimme a second here, ‘kay sweetheart?”
- His begging is strained and tight, and it makes your lips curl into a smile.
- “That’s okay,” You coo.
- “Just lemme—”
- “If you need to cum—”
- “Goddamnit—”
- “If you wanna, I mean—”
- Eddie growls in frustration, dropping his forehead against your shoulder again.
- “Fucking—shit, shit, shit,” He hisses.
- You groan, stunned, as Eddie’s cock twitches and spills inside of you.
- He doesn’t give either of you a moment to recover. He just pushes your thighs up around his middle and begins to fuck you, his cock still stunningly hard.
- You groan, letting your head rest back against the pillows as Eddie’s hips roll and twist.
- He lowers his head to your breasts, sucking and lapping and teasing your nipples.
- You curl your fingers in his hair, whining and wiggling, pressing your hips down into his.
- You tip his head up to look at you. You take in the flush in his cheeks, the beading of sweat on his forehead.
- You nervously slide your eyes over his face before you hesitate and lean up, brushing your lips against Eddie’s.
- Eddie doesn’t second-guess the touch. His lips part, and his tongue dips into your mouth.
- The two of you share heady groans at the contact.
- He lowers himself against your chest, pressing your body flush to yours as you share fierce, heated kisses.
- Eddie never gets far from you, even when the kisses break.
- His lips skim against your jaw, your cheek, your neck.
- He trails his tongue up along your throat, presses a kiss to your chin, then dips his head to kiss you again.
- Over your pounding heart and the smacking of your hips and kisses, you can hear the squelching push of his cock into your stuffed, slick pussy.
- Your burning body tingles with a familiar sensation. It almost makes you want to cry—but you need to cum so badly.
- “Eddie,” You whimper in warning.
- He doesn’t need anything else. Eddie slides his hand between the two of you, swiping messily at your clit.
- His name leaves you in a broken cry. Your eyes squeeze shut, nails sinking into his shoulders as your hips slap against his.
- Eddie doesn’t stop—Eddie’s one up on you.
- He draws back, pulling his cock out and taking hold of it.
- “Can I...Can I?” He asks, eyes darting nervously between your eyes and your tits.
- You nod, sliding your hands over his thighs and arching your back enticingly.
- Eddie groans, scrambling over your chest. He jerks his cock fervently, tongue hanging from his mouth like a panting dog.
- He moans, leaning over you as his cum splatters across your breasts and throat. 
- Then Eddie sighs softly, resting his hand beside your head to steady himself.
- He plops back on the bed between your spread, shaking legs.
- His eyes travel to your pulsing, throbbing cunt. His tongue swipes across his lips as a bit of his cum dribbles from your pussy.
- He pushes your thighs wide again, rolling onto his stomach.
- You shiver at the look in his eye, and as your body crackles with the same familiar welling of heat.
- Eddie gives you a small, questioning nod, and grins wide when you reach down, gripping at his hair and tugging him in.
--
- “A little more, baby, one more—”
- “Eddie—”
- “One more, one fucking more—I can feel it,” He groans, fucking into you more harshly.
- You tip your head forward, pressing it into Eddie’s pillow and drawing in a shuddering breath.
- His fingers press into your hips, body resting atop yours. You lift your head just a bit, glancing back toward him.
- Eddie is wild-eyed. His lips are plump and slick. When he catches your eye, he grins.
- He reels back, resting his hands on your ass and giving it a squeeze and a slap as he fucks into your slick, aching cunt.
- The fever has yet to break. Your muscles ache; your thighs are trembling; your body is riddled with sweat and hickies.
- Eddie shows no sign of being cured, either.
- You’ve lost count of how many times you’ve both cum, and you think he has, too.
- You couldn’t count if you tried; your brain is absolutely scrambled.
- There isn’t a single part of you that Eddie hasn’t kissed, licked, or cum on.
- There isn’t a single part of him that you haven’t kissed, nipped, stroked, or scratched (though most of the scratches have been by accident).
- You hear Eddie’s breath hitch, and you know it’s coming—you know he’s cumming.
- Your eyes closr as you feel Eddie pull out of your pussy.
- It’s a moment, then you feel the heat and splatter of his cum against your back.
- You feel the mattress bounce as Eddie lands beside you.
- “Okay,” He murmurs, “Your turn.”
--
- Your back is sore. Your thighs are aching. You make the mistake of shifting just a little, and you lose a tired groan.
- Opening your eyes, you find the sun trying to push through the window of Eddie’s room.
- The room smells like stale sweat, weed, and cigarettes. 
- You lift your head, glancing around, and smile when you find Eddie beside you.
- You reach out, gently pushing his hair back from the his face. Your eyes wander him in his calmness. It’s unfamiliar to you—especially after last night.
- Eddie’s eyelids flicker, and your stomach flips as he opens his eyes. 
- Your nerves bubble up, but Eddie immediately allays them with a smile. He cuddles closer, curling his arm around your middle and snuggling into your side.
- “Morning,” He mumbles.
- “Hi there.”
- “You hungry? ‘m starving.”
- “Uh-huh...Eddie?”
- “Mm?”
- “...You got any more of that stuff?”
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brewstersbru · 2 months
Text
More radioapple with ace Alastor (cont. of last 📻🍎 fic) sorry if its a little ooc im sappy
“No.”
Alastor’s voice comes out quick and staticky as he expertly dodges Lucifer’s hands trying to pet down his waistcoat. Lucifer immediately steps back, eyes wide.
“Sorry! Sorry, Al, was that not okay?” He asks, still keeping his distance. Alastor’s expression is inscrutable, nose wrinkled as he smiles at the ground.
It’s quiet for a moment before Alastor shakes his head.
“I need to be alone for a bit.” He grits, then, just as Lucifer goes to respond, his shadows envelop him and he melts from the room.
“That’s-“ Lucifer sighs, “fine.” Leave it to him to somehow fuck this up. “This” being the unspoken, ever so slightly romantic thing he and Alastor have had going on ever since that night in the bathroom.
It started with meals; after figuring out that Lucifer was bearing his wound, Alastor- for lack of a better term- threw himself into feeding him.
Lucifer thought it was sweet that he used his, surprisingly human, ways to care for him through recovery. The food probably didn’t do anything tangible in helping Lucifer’s body patch itself together, but it made him feel warm, loved. Better than he has in an age.
The food, of course, was delicious, but what Lucifer liked most about taking meals with Alastor was the quiet sense of simply being with another person, without expectation. Without an unspoken asking for something in return. Lucifer had already done his part, and the pulsing pain in his chest each night was infinitely worth each peaceful hour.
At first, Alastor didn’t touch him if he didn’t have to, but just him being there, acknowledging Lucifer’s presence and doing his best to care for him through the pain was enough. Lucifer thought it would be over when he was finally healed, that Alastor would consider his debt repaid and leave him to his own devices once the bleeding stopped.
It was almost too much to imagine.
Lucifer has a nasty habit of getting attached, which is really quite unfortunate given his circumstances. Still, he hasn’t been able to shake it quite yet, and in a shameful moment of spiraling weakness, he had torn through his stitches, hoping to elongate the healing window, even just slightly.
He left the three green X’s alone, tried to keep it secret, but somehow Alastor figured it out, like he always seems to.
Furious, he’d marched Lucifer right back to the bathroom and redid his stiches, this time entirely with the neon green thread he is able to manifest at will.  The thread was warm, a little biting against his skin, but Lucifer liked it. Liked that it meant Alastor would pay attention to him.
God, what a pathetic thing to do. He still cringes when he thinks back on it, but loneliness will make a wasteland out of you. And Lucifer was desperate enough to bleed for the company, his blood is a mere pittance, after all. He’ll never run dry.
The longer they spent together, the more comfortable Alastor was touching Lucifer; little brushes against his shoulder as he passed behind his usual seat at the kitchen island, a steadying hand on his side when he checked his stitches.
It was bliss.
There was a starving, gnawing part of him that basked in it; that took the offered touches like scraps from a table and still wanted more. Another part of him, cold and still burnt from the last time, told him not to get stupid, not to ask for more than he was worth.
Never to beg, because begging is unbecoming of a king.
They fell into a rhythm, small touches, loaded glances, oh so subtle forms of care. Lucifer was healed before he wanted to be, but Alastor didn’t stop. Didn’t leave, even when he checked his stitches one day and, grinning, snipped them away to reveal a shining pink scar.
Even healed, Alastor cooked for him. Even on days when he couldn’t force himself to leave his room, a covered plate would be left just outside his door, food incomprehensibly warm even hours after being made. The touches- maddening, lovely as they were- continued, chaste and addicting as ever.
Lucifer began to feel wild with it. Something inside of him- frayed at the edges, and torn in the middle- couldn’t quite grasp what was happening. Why? He thought. Why, still? Why me? He never got the courage to ask, too afraid of Alastor realizing his mistake.
So, they continued like that. Alastor got more comfortable touching Lucifer who was more than happy to let him. It seemed like he didn’t get much practice with it. Touching.
The more Lucifer fell into the lull of security, the more he noticed the tentativeness of each touch, the careful laying of each finger against pale skin, as if Alastor were exploring touch for the first time. As if it fascinated him.
Lucifer never asked- always afraid of doing something stupid to make the final shoe drop faster- but he did notice. And he began coming up with a plan. Alastor is not the only person in hell who sees their relationships as transactional. Good deeds must be paid back. They must, or you’re indebted. Or, more frighteningly, at least to Lucifer, they will grow bored of you.
They will see that you are ungrateful, and they will leave.
Unwilling to let that happen, Lucifer devised a plot. Alastor has very obviously never been very intimate with anyone before, which is totally ok, if not confusing given his objectively handsome features. But he evidently, somehow, feels safe exploring intimacy with Lucifer, which is so incredibly heartening (it makes something hot burst in his chest every time he thinks about it). Lucifer can use this to pay Alastor back, slowly introduce him to different touches until he feels more comfortable with them.
It’s perfect. Or- he thought it was perfect. Until today. Until Alastor got that wide, panicked look in his eyes as he shouted “No!” before running off to recover. Father Above. How did Lucifer manage to fuck up this bad? There’s no way they recover from this.
He takes a second to mourn the relationship before squaring his shoulders and heading to his room to write about a hundred drafts of his apology letter. He can’t believe he so brazenly stepped over a boundary, not even realizing it was there!
He’s the king of hell for godssakes, he should know when one of his subjects is on edge, or uncomfortable. More than that, he’s spent enough time with Alastor that he should know his tells, as well.
Some king he’s turned out to be, huh? Fuck.
***
It takes Alastor two days to appear before Lucifer again, and not for lack of trying on his part. Lucifer had forced himself from his room each day, wandering the hotel’s grounds looking for him. Several times he would sit at the bar for hours on end, watching, waiting.
Not for nothing, though, he’s learned something quite interesting about the bartender, Husk, and Angel Dust, the porn star.
Over a series of poorly hushed conversations, and not-so-surreptitious glances, he’s learned that they’re dating. Have been for a good few weeks, and somehow no one’s noticed. They seem glad of that fact, though, so Lucifer resolves not to tell anyone.
More interesting, though, is that Husk has been urging his boyfriend to ‘go for what he wants, for once’ which Lucifer hadn’t really understood until he looked over and caught both of them hurriedly looking away. Super unsuspiciously. It was almost enough to make a grown man blush, the sudden knowledge that he was wanted. That despite what he tells himself in his worst moments, he is desirable.
Angel is an attractive man, Lucifer’s not too insecure in himself to admit that, but something curdles in his gut at the thought of pursuing anything with him while he and Alastor are still on the rocks. Which… Is new, and a little terrifying.
Plus, he doesn’t exactly seem like the type to take charge, if you catch his drift, and while Lucifer is happy to play any role his partner wants, he doesn’t know if he’d be any good at it. Not anymore. He just can’t see himself as a figure of authority, not when he knows what it’s really like to be himself. Pathetic, and lonely. The thought of embarrassing himself like that while vulnerable is excruciating, so he pretends not to have noticed their intentions. Thankfully, Angel hasn’t approached him yet. He’s not sure what he would say, anyway.
Back to the most pressing matter, Alastor knocks on Lucifer’s door late at night, two days after the awkwardness of Lucifer’s unwanted touches. When Lucifer opens the door, he’s smiling calmly, and holding two covered plates, one in each hand.
“May I come in?” He asks. Lucifer nods, doggedly, then flushes when he remembers the state that his room is in, after several nights of wallowing. Being the king of hell does have its perks, though, so he snaps his fingers and the place rights itself.
Not before Alastor gets a good enough look to purse his lips disapprovingly, though.
Lucifer manifests a small table and two chairs, which Alastor makes immediate use of, placing a plate in front of each chair, and pulling one out for Lucifer to sit in.
“Please, take a seat. I think we need to talk.” Great. That’s always a good start to a conversation. Not like that’s ever gone wrong for Lucifer before. Nope.
With a sigh- internally steeling himself against the impending rejection- Lucifer sits. Alastor hums, and follows suit, snapping his fingers to disappear the lids to their food as soon as he’s seated.
It looks delicious, as it always does. Some sort of colored rice dish with meat and veggies mixed throughout. Lucifer smiles and thanks him, snapping to manifest some drinks- a champagne for himself, and a rich red wine for Alastor.
It’s quiet for a bit as they take their first few bites. Lucifer hums his appreciation, which Alastor’s smile ticks up at.
Finally, stomach knotting itself enough to disrupt his enjoyment of the food, Lucifer speaks.
“I’m so sorry, Al. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, but I did, and if there’s anything I can do- anything at all- to make up for it-“ before he can finish, Alastor cuts in, voice staticky.
“It wasn’t your fault, my dear. You didn’t know. I’m afraid I…” He trails off for a bit, mulling over his next words. Lucifer waits patiently, eyes wide.
“I’m afraid I can’t do that specific kind of touching. I don’t like it.” He’s not looking at Lucifer anymore, head turned to the side as he taps his claws against his wine glass. Lucifer tilts his head.  
“By ‘that kind of touching’, do you mean on your torso? I don’t want to mess it up again.” He asks. It’s a little presumptuous to imply that he’ll be able to touch Alastor, after this, but he’s too on edge to censor himself correctly. Alastor scoffs.
“You did not ‘mess anything up’. There was just a simple miscommunication. By that I mean sexual touches. Or anything meant to lead in that direction.” Ah, Lucifer’s hand had been quite close to his navel, and his intention was most definitely to take the touches further if Alastor was comfortable with it. He nods, apologizing once more.
“Got it. Sorry again, Al, I know you don’t think I need to say it, but I still feel bad. Thank you for telling me.” Lucifer- infinitely relieved and brimming with ill-advised hope- smiles up at him and rests his hand, palm up, in the middle of the table. Maybe he can salvage this. Maybe he doesn’t have to lose everything again.
Alastor’s grin softens at the edges as his eyes rove over Lucifer’s expression. He ‘tsk’s but places his own hand on top of Lucifer’s, gently intertwining their fingers and bringing them up to press a small kiss to Lucifer’s knuckles.
A giddy laugh bursts from Lucifer’s chest and he buries his face- or what he can manage to obscure of it- into the palm of his remaining hand. It’s okay. Alastor’s not angry with him, it’s okay.
A few tears gather on his lashline, but he blinks them away before they can fall. Alastor’s other hand leaves his wine glass to brush just underneath Lucifer’s eye.
“Oh, don’t cry, dearest. It’s alright.” He says, voice softer than Lucifer thinks he’s ever heard it. It occurs to him that this must have been hard for Alastor, too, so unused to being vulnerable, but still showing this part of himself to Lucifer, and for what? So that Lucifer feels better? To put his mind at ease?
It’s so stupid.
It’s so kind.
Lucifer shakes his head, “Happy tears, Al. Thanks for trusting me.”
Alastor’s thumb swipes against the apple of his cheek as he hums.
“As if I could do anything else.”
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mayfieldss · 1 month
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Five minutes - Angus Macgyver
Synopsis: In which you and Mac are supposed to be studying, but he has something else in mind.
Warnings: sexual innuendos, MIT!mac, uni au, Mac is such a whore I'm gagged, there's literally no plot it's literally just an aggressive make out session. idk what to tell y'all.
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Mac liked to believe he was a focused guy. Yes, he fiddled with things in classes and lectures, and yes, he had made a few minor chemical bombs in high school to pass the time, but he was in university now. A highly educated and focused man. He just processed information faster when he had something in his hands. A paperclip, for example, or the springs from a pen.
Mac was a focused man, but he also liked to make his own decisions, and today, he wanted to focus on something other than the scribbled notes and equations on paper. He wanted to focus on what was in his grasp, shifting underneath his very focused hands.
Mac is currently standing in the science laboratory, with you—his beloved girlfriend—in front of him. You're supposed to be checking the PH levels of specific substances for a paper due in two days' time, but Mac's heart—and hands—just don't have the energy to care. What he does care about, however, is the way his fingers feel placed delicately on your hips. His touch is light as he stands behind you, watching you work with furrowed brows, but he can tell that each time the pads of his fingers brush under the hem of your shirt, he gains a little more of your attention.
"Your handwriting is terrible," Mac mumbles, lips pressed ever so purposefully against the space behind your ear. He knows the effect it has on you, and with his chest pressed against your back, he can feel it too. Your deep breath in and your sharp exhale makes him grin wide against the large expanse of exposed skin on your neck.
"My handwriting is perfectly readable, actually." You snip back, placing down your pen on the bench. Mac removes one hand from your body to point at the notes scribbled in front of you.
"Okay, what does that say?"
"Two minutes till absorption." Your breath hitches when Mac places a well timed kiss to your neck, and you can feel his teeth graze across the skin there when he smirks.
"Oh, does it now? Because to me that looks a lot like a five." His hands have snaked from your hips to your lower abdomen, and he's nothing if not determined to distract you from the work.
"Okay, so it may be a five, but—" before you can finish the sentence Mac has spun you around to face him. The smug smile that graces his lips sends a shiver down your spine in anticipation, but you don't let it show.
"Mac, we need to get this finished."
"I think we deserve a break."
"I don't." You push Mac back then, gently, but with enough force to get your point across. "If we get this done today we can have as many 'breaks' as we want tomorrow."
"Or we could have as many breaks as we want now, and do this tomorrow." Mac takes a few steps back before sitting down on one of the wheeled laboratory stools, sliding himself a small ways back and forth across the floor. He has a bit of fun with it for a while before he becomes bored again, eyes burning into you from behind. He can tell you aren't doing the work you claim to be attentive too. He knows you too well by now. Mac knows every expression, every tone of your voice, and of course, he knows your body.
"Babe," he speaks gently, with less mischief now. "c'mere for a second. Please."
He watches your figure pause, and he can tell you're thinking it over. He tries not to smile when you turn around, but every step you take toward him is like a point on his scoreboard.
"Just five minutes, Angus." you use his first name so he knows you mean it, but even as you seat yourself in his lap you know it hasn't registered in his brain. He's too focused on your arms around his neck, your legs straddling him, to care about anything else.
"Five minutes. I promise." He winks at you, and you don't buy the deal he's made, but you want it just as bad, and Mac knows it. He watches the seriousness in your eyes fade, and the smile crawl it's way onto your lips, before he moves in for the first kiss, short and sweet.
It doesn't stay that way for long.
There's very little conversation after that, just the shifting of bodies and the movement of hands. Mac can't deny that he doesn't want to stop at the five minute mark, and he doesn't think that he can. There's just one problem—The chair at which Mac chose to sit and its goddamned wheels. With every kiss, grind and gasp the chair slides, disrupting the melded movements of Mac's body with yours.
Mac was a focused man but some distractions were too hard to ignore. That's why after one particularly deep kiss, and one very sudden movement from the unsteady chair, Mac gives in.
"Fuck it, this isn't gonna work." His words come as pants, out of breath as he stands from the chair, picking you up with him. The way your legs wrap around his waist brings out a quiet groan from his throat as he supports you, a hand on your thigh. Your grip on his shoulders is tight, as if you're afraid he'll drop you, though you know he never would.
"What are you doing?"
Mac squeezes your thigh, his grin presenting itself once more. "Improvising."
After all, that was what he did best, but you'd never expected this kind of determination from him, at least not now, in broad daylight, in the MIT laboratory.
In seconds Mac is practically throwing you onto the workbench, sending your notes flying.
"Mac—" He cuts you off with a kiss, a desperate one that has you moaning into his mouth out of pure shock and pleasure. When your hands find their way back into his hair Mac is a goner. He's a sucker for it, and with one tug of his blonde locks he's at your mercy. He's gripping you tight in seconds, one hand expertly moving up the back of your shirt, and instantly, you lean forward into him, his fingers running up and down your spine. It sends shivers through you until you're practically attempting to climb the blonde, slipping off the bench in your craze.
Mac doesn't hesitate to pull you flush against him then, deepening the kiss as best he can before lifting you again, grip strong on your ass.
You pull away for a moment gasping for breath as he brings you back to sit on the workbench, his lips leaving harsh marks on your neck. The bites will bruise later, and prove to everyone that there is nothing Angus MacGyver won't do to get a taste of you.
"You okay?" His eyes are locked with yours, a strong hand resting softly of the side of your face, The pause is genuine and sweet, and when you nod in response, still out of breath, the smirk that marks him is one that could kill. He looks better than ever in this moment, like he was hand crafted just for you, and when he kisses you again, tongue fighting with yours, you think that just might be the case. He fits perfectly with you, and that just makes you want him more.
Mac doesn't think he can love anyone as much as he does you, and he's been just as desperate for your touch many times before. He can never get enough of you it seems, and with every second you spend running your hands over him, his chest, his shoulders, his neck, he gets closer to going insane.
Angus MacGyver is nothing if not a focused man, and now, he is focused completely and entirely on you. His hands smooth over the insides of your thighs as he guides you further back onto the bench. His mind is fuzzy with the need to please you, and you're happy to let him, but you're both soon startled by the crashing of glass nearby.
Mac has knocked a beaker off the bench, the thick glass done for as it lies in shards on the floor below you, but it doesn't take Mac long to move on. He sends the broken pieces a quick glance, though his attention, his thoughts, his heart, are too set on you for him to care.
His hands continue their motions prior to the accident, but before he can connect his lips with yours again, he notices your gaze on the shards. He moves a hand to your chin, guiding you to look at him, and as much as Mac wants to take you on the bench right then and there, he stops.
"Just forget about it." he gives you a gentle peck, the kiss causing a soft smile to form. He's proud of it, and the fact he was the one to give it to you, though you don't let him off that easy.
"We have to clean it up." You dare to run your hands through Mac's hair, and he can't help but shift closer to you. He can't hide the lust in his eyes, nor can you, but you are able to function properly, unlike Mac.
"Later" He mumbles, his hands sliding down to rest on your waist. They're warm, inviting, and your restraint almost breaks.
"They're gonna make us pay for it." You whisper, barely able to form a sentence when Mac's hands start roaming softly over your body.
"Not if they don't know it was us." Any time his hands meet bare skin you have to hold back an embarrassing sigh, though you're sure Mac wouldn't mind if you let it slip. He'd love it, and the both of you know that. In fact that's what he's trying to get from you in this very moment. It's the sound he's waiting for with the brightest fire of anticipation.
"And what if they figure it out?" you're trying to distract him, just as he is you. It's been far longer than five minutes like you'd promised.
"They can add it to my tab." Mac mumbles, lips finally meeting yours again. He takes the kiss slow this time, though there is just as much passion within it, and he can feel you give in under the squeezes of his fingers and tracing of his palms. He lies you back across the bench, and you can't help but chuckle as he pops the button on your pants.
Later, you'll regret the impulse decision to give in to Mac's charms, when you realize the cameras in the lab were still running long before and long after your visit. Lucky for you, Mac knows a thing or two about breaking and entering, you'll wipe the footage from the cameras, and maybe, just maybe, take the risk of playing around in the security room.
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GENERAL TAGLIST: @candywh0r3 @caplanreadss @hiya-itsamber @s00buwu
MACGYVER TAGLIST: @ash5monster01
reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated!!
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oddballwriter · 2 months
Text
Extra Credit
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Summary: You and Steven decide to do some roleplay in the bedroom.
Warnings: Teacher/student relationship ROLEPLAY. Roleplay kink/roleplay for sex. Gender, pronouns, and sex anatomy of the reader is not specified but they are the one doing the penetrating (you can envision it as a dick or a strap-on. Male/Character receiving penetration. Steven being a bottom. Praise kink (character receiving). Dom reader/Sub Steven. 
Author’s Snip: I was originally going to have the reader in the 'sub' roles for this but after someone gave me the idea to have Marc in the sub role for his part of the roleplay I decided that all three of them get to be the sub roles because they deserve to be submissive for once. I also was planning on having all three of the boys together but I decided that I'm going to give you all a treat and give you separate ones of the boys for this idea.
I’ll shut up now. Enjoy! And don’t be afraid to request.
Word Count: 1,614
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Checking that your outfit and things are right you send Steven a text that you're ready and waiting on him. You hear a knock on the front door of the flat, you know that means that the scene has begun. You take a breath to get into character and walk your way to the door from the desk, opening it to reveal Steven.
"Hello, professor." Steven smiles, nervously standing. You sense that the nervousness is from having to keep to his role but treat it like it's part of the roleplay. "Hello, Steven," you greet with a warm smile, "Come on in. I'm glad you could make it," you say as you step aside to let him in. "Well, you know, it's a bit important," Steven says as he walks in and stands just inside the flat instead of going someplace more inside the flat. After all, this is 'your' place in this scenario. "That it is." you respond.
After a brief moment and a slightly awkward glance from Steven he finally speaks, "I'm very sorry to have to come to you in your own home. I know I'm meant to see you during your office hours." he states. "It's alright, Steven. Usually, I do have students talk to me outside of class during office hours only but I figured you would be a worthy exception," you claim. "Here," you place a hand on his lower back and gently guide him around, grabbing a chair from another spot and setting it next to, his, your desk, "Make yourself comfortable.".
Steven nods and sits down in the chair, your hand slides up from his back to his shoulder as he does so. "Would you like something to drink?" you ask, "Water, tea, coffee, a glass of wine maybe? You seem a bit tense." you list with a bit of a joke at the end. Steven gives a timid laugh and says no. You nod and move towards the desk chair to have a seat, in the process, your hand leaves Steven's shoulder which irks a micro reaction out of him that you ignore.
You pull up a fake grade sheet that you made for this role-play to pretend to look at and be fake disappointed by. You sigh, "I'll be honest with you Steven. Your grade doesn't look too good. You're just under the bar for a passing grade." you explain to him. "I know," Steven mumbles. "I want to say that I'm willing to round it up but it's low enough that that's not possible," you claim while giving him a pitying look. "You're a clever man and a very well-mannered student, Steven." you place a hand on his knee, "I hate to see you struggling so, especially so close to the end of the course," you mention.
"Is there anything I can do?" Steven asks before clearing his throat, "I need to pass this to get the credits in." he tells you with his little doe eyes. You notice him crossing his legs, something he does when he has an erection and wants to hide it but in the process he makes himself smaller. You move in closer.
"Do you think I could do something for extra credit? Something that could make it to the range where you can round it up, or... something?" Steven stammers. You can see the blush on his face and sense the heat radiating off his body by touching his thigh. You bite your lip and keep going. "I wish I could but I don't do extra credit, you know that," you say.
"Maybe you could make another exception for me," Steven suggests with a labored huff. You look at him, seeing his red blushed cheeks and seeing the look in his eyes. He's definitely becoming more comfortable with this judging by his stammering turning into the lightly pitch strained tone that he gets when he's turned on.
"Steven," you mutter, "You're awfully tense and warm." you say as you touch his forehead and chest, "Are you alright?" you fake your concern more and get up to get him some water.
"Are you sure I can't do anything to get you to give me some point?" he huffs abruptly as he leans into the touch a bit as it leaves.
You act like you just realized what he's getting at. "I don't think that would be right," you say making your tines more clearly faked as you say "Students and professors aren't supposed to be doing things together outside of the normal relationship they're meant to have.". You start to massage his shoulder a bit, your touch going from 'accidental' to teasing. Steven crosses his legs tighter, "I won't tell if you won't, professor.".
  It’s off to the races from there. A kiss turns into a sloppy one, into Steven grabbing at whatever he can on your body and you the same but also taking on leading him into standing up and stumbling around. Steven lets you lead the way to the bed but has dropped the part about not knowing the layout of the flat, which you don’t mind, wanting the same thing he does. 
  You lay Steven on the bed, on his back, bending over him, and stood between his legs so that he couldn’t close them. Your mouth moves from his lips to his neck to gently kiss and suck at certain spots as your hands paw and grip at his waist and hips, Steven letting out soft moans as you do so. “Are you sure you want to do this? I can just give you the points if you want to change your mind,” you whisper in his ear. “Keep going.” he pleads through a breath, gripping at the waist of your pants. “Don’t rush it, Steven. I’m not going to just take what I want.” you say as you lift your head to look at him, “I don’t want to hurt my favorite student after all, hm?” you hum. 
  More sloppy kisses are given before you carefully unbutton his shirt and then open the button of his pants, gliding your hands on his hot skin causing him to squirm. “You’re so sensitive.” you chuckle, “Are you always like this?” you ask, slowly coaxing his pants off as you talk. Steven nods, turning away to hide his face. You use one of your hands to make him look back at you, “Don’t be shy about it. It’s cute.” you coo. “It makes me wonder how sensitive it is inside of you.”, you push another kiss on the pulse of his neck and feel his heartbeat through his skin. 
  You get his pants and briefs off, revealing his aching cock, already collecting precum on the tip. Without much thought, you move down to lick it off which earns a loud whine from the poor Steven. You decide that you don’t want to torture him any longer and back away to get ready. After fumbling around and placing lube, you go back to being over him, lining up with Steven’s entrance. “Are you ready?” you ask, Steven nods and so you push into him slowly, “Just relax for me.” you direct. Very slowly, you push in and out of him letting him get used to the feeling. Soon his soft grunts turn back into moans. 
  “There you go.” you praise. 
  Steven covers his mouth to hide his moans as you speed up to a regular pace. “Why are you hiding your moans? I want to hear you,” you tease as you go in deeper, making Steven let out an audibly loud moan even with his hand muffling it. Steven takes his hand away to say “I don’t want anyone else to hear~” in a whine. You take to opportunity to catch his hand with yours while you thrust into him, pinning his wrists above his head and using one hand to keep them there while your other hand goes back to holding his hips steady. “They won’t care. They don’t need to know you’re getting fucked for a better grade.” you taunt. 
  As you keep going moans and loud whines fall out of Steven. You’re sure that at this point no one cares when you two have sex, probably having gotten used to tuning out the muffled sound of Steven getting it through the walls.  
  At a certain point, you both get more desperate, your thrusts get sloppier and Steven, now too preoccupied with the pleasure he’s receiving, is bucking his hips to try and get more by trying to move with you. The hand that was holding Steven’s wrists is gone but Steven doesn’t cover his mouth with them now. Now he digs his nails into your back for dear life as he tries to get to his release. “Keep going! Please~” he begs, “I’m close!” he claims. “ I know,” you reply, “I’m almost there too.”. 
  Steven starts to let out more high-pitched whines and arch his back, you just keep going, knowing that he’s getting ready to come. “Come on, Steven,” you pant, “Let it all out for me. Come for me like you want that grade.” you encourage. He takes your harsher near-climax thrusts.
  “You’re being such a good boy.” you praise.
  And like you snipped a rubber band, Steven’s body lets him come at your words. He rides it out while you thrust out your own and finish. Both of you are sweating panting messes snapping out of the daleriam you put yourselves in. 
After catching your breath you look back at Steven. “That was fun,” you comment as you kiss his cheek. “We should try this again sometime.”. Steven nods. 
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Taglist: @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction
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