#i dont know how many more heartbreaks over what could have been i can go through
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save me
save me ferrari imola upgrades
save me ....
#charles leclerc#ferrari#f1#formula 1#formula one#txt#i dont know how many more heartbreaks over what could have been i can go through#chinese gp 2024
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♡ ALICE X GN! READER ♡
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚Alice x Gn!Bubbly!Reader˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
SUMMARY: Alice spared your life and is slowly getting used to you <3 (can be seen as platonic or romantic)
(I LOVE HER SM; also I am aware that this doesn't scream “BUBBLY READER” but it is how all met so of course you aren't going to be bubbly when you are about to die)
DIALOG DETAILS:
None today. . . Editing is a pain in my ass maybe next time!!!
Warnings: Angsty-ish (Mostly on Alice’s part), Fluff(at the end), Blood (Reader got a small cut on their cheek), Mentions of Claire's death (In the 3rd person part), I sort of project myself into Alice in her POV, Enemies to ??? (IMK IF I MISSED ANYTHING!!!!!!)
This fic is based on the song: ‘ARE WE STILL FREINDS’ by Tyler the Creator and ‘Red Tears’ by The Johns
ENJOY!!
You had failed your Math test and were running from Miss Circle when you saw a door that said ‘EXIT’. . . Without thinking you entered the room and were led into a dark room. . .
This wasn’t the exit, it was Alice’s room, you hear low growling from a dark corner. Then suddenly a raspy feminine voice begins to say “What are you doing here, in my room” You felt a chill run up your spine, you felt frozen, couldn’t speak or move. . . Is this how you die? You haven't lived life…Haven't had a first love, Gotten a scholarship, Gone to college, Felt Heartbreak, or even had your first kiss. . . Is this how you will die?
The voice spoke again with a much more aggressive tone “I said. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE”. This time she didn’t wait for a response instead a large razor-sharp spike sprouted from the ground, knocking you over, and you felt blood trickle down your left cheek….
Your life flashed in front of your eyes.There Alice was in front of you, in all her terrifying glory….There are rumors that she tears people apart limb from limb and eats them, or that she is such a monster that even the devil himself fears her, there's many rumors…What isn't helping her case is what she did to Claire, the poor girl was torn apart and some of her organs were gone…That only made everyone think “This is Alice’s world, we are only living in it” and it was true this isn't our world or our life…Life is carefree but with Alice’s presence known, Life is anything but carefree….
Her claws protracted and she stared with glowing red eyes… you were terrified, all you could do was sit there and accept it, you closed your eyes expecting to be slashed by Alice’s claws, but Alice didn't kill you, instead, she stared down at you with sympathy in her eyes. “Get up” She helps you up, you're still terrified..but thankful, thankful for the fact she spared your life… “why did you spare me?” your voice was shaky and quiet, nothing like your usual self…
(ALICE’S POV)
I dont know why I spared them, the fear in their eyes, the fact that they didn't fight back…its probably just pity, but their face, the terror, the utter fear of dying young…I dont know why I spared them, it should have been easy for me to kill them but their face made me think of the past when I was sweet, but this cruel world turned me bitter….I see my reflection in their eyes, I just could have killed such an innocent soul as theirs, in cold blood…I can’t, I just can’t…
“I- I dont know why…I just couldn’t” I looked into their eyes, and all I could see was fear but an underlining of gratitude…Looking into their eyes was like looking into a mirror showing the same soul different body…I brush a stray strand of hair out of their face, I reach into my pocket for a bandaid and put it on their cut…”There much better, are you okay?” they were still shaking and still terrified but they responded regardless
“I am fine, just a little shaken up”“I think it's best you rest for a bit” I try to make my voice sound soothing even though I haven’t had human interaction in a while…After sitting them down, I sit next to them…I dont know why but I wanted to get to know them… “What's your name?” they responded hesitantly but I can't blame them for that, their attacker was trying to know them…It's weird, but regardless they responded. “My name is [Name]...”
(YOUR POV) It felt weird to see Alice so nice and calm, she noticed I was shaking still, and she suddenly pulled me into a hug…It's unexpected but not unwelcomed, she smelled nice like rose petals and jasmine tea. I started to calm down, she patted my hair softly….I started to fall asleep which Alice quickly noticed because of the sudden weight change…. “Goodnight, [name]. . .Sweet Dreams”
(RAHHHHHHHHHH I LOBE THIS!!!)
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Ok hi wow I was supposed to ask for some sunoo hcs (as your bf) but like..I have a bnd req now too !! I was wondering if you could write smth for woonhak where he confesses to yn, right? and then yn rejects him bc of some issues she has w herself idk…but dont get me wrong she does like him! so now what is woonhak left to do ? (ofc they still end up together < 33) (like maybe it could be a mini smau..if you could but it could also just be a nice little fic or smth) this is what i was thinking abt when i saw the heartbreak girl fic you were working on 😭 i wonder what woonhak would feel after that rejection yk? how would it affect his seemingly happy and cheery personality ? (also im so sorry if this is long atp im rambling but if youre too busy a few sunoo hcs would be just fine)
REJECT ME SO I CAN MOVE ON
rejecting your best friend woonhak was quite literally one of the most difficult and complicated thing in your life. you loved him, but there were so many personal obstacles in the way.
PAIRING kim woonhak x fem!reader
WC 0.7k
TAGS adults dni. friends to lovers. slight angst. fluff. reader needs to fix herself but woonhak comes to the resue. readers problems aren't specifically mentioned.
OMI NOTE oh my goshness i'm so sorry this request is very long overdue, i've been so busy. i hope this is okay though lovey.
after he told you those special words, confessing his undying love to you and how much he cared, you didn’t know what to say. woonhak was your best friend in the entire solar system. even alien marshians couldn’t have a relationship as close as what the two of you have.
which is why it was even harder to let him down like this. it was impossible for you to give him the love he deserved when you had so much shit going on in your head. the situation made tears sting your eyes, as you had to watch his loving face drop to an unreadable expression.
this was a roadblock in your friendship, because even after you tried to get things to go back to normal, he couldn’t face you quite the same.
you figured it was about time to have a conversation with him about what has been bothering you, but it makes you sick to even think about. because even if you told him, he might not understand.
it made you feel even more selfish when jaehyun had to ask you what happened between you guys, and why woonhak hasn’t come out of his room for some time. how his normally bright and cheery demeanor was suddenly cold and distant.
this made you realize that you had to talk to him about things. to clear it up and make it right. you were sick and tired of letting him believe you weren’t also madly in love with him.
taesan snuck you into their dorms late at night, there was a soft glow from the cracks of woonhak’s door that shown down the hall. you thanked him profusely before making your way to his room and knocking on the door.
“jaehyun leave the food at the door.” he groaned out.
“woon it’s me, y/n. let me in please?” you found yourself almost begging, hoping he’d open for you.
a short silence was interrupted by the sound of footsteps and the doorknob unlocking. you opened the door and followed in behind him. he looked tired, his eye bags more prominent and hair just slightly messier. if the thought of him ruining himself over your rejection broke your heart, this sight shattered it.
“do you need something? it’s kinda late you usually don’t come over until the day.” he mumbles.
“we need to talk about this. talk about us..”
“there’s nothing wrong with us y/n, we’re best friends remember?” he tried to reassure you.
“that’s the problem woon, i hate seeing you like this knowing that you have feelings for me and–”
“it’s over y/n, just let it go.” he interrupts, falling backwards into the comfort of his bed. you lay next to him and stare up at the ceiling.
“i hate seeing you know you have feelings for me and i like you too, but there’s so much shit going on in my life that i don’t think you deserve to deal with that.” you exhale, feeling a weight be lifted off of your shoulders. theres a dip in the mattress when woonhak quickly gets up to lean on his arm.
“wait you like me back?”
“i might’ve loved you for longer than you’ve loved me, woon. it killed me to reject you but i knew i had to.”
“y/n.. you know how much i care about you, i’d do anything to help you.” his gaze softened at your eyes visibly starting to tear up.
“it’s so hard woon, i can’t do it by myself but you already have so much on your plate.” you sniff, wiping your eyes with your sleeve.
“you mean the most to me y/n. even if we stayed friends, i wouldn’t be able to see you hurting like this and not break my back trying to help you.” you giggled at his comment.
he took his hand to wipe the tears that fell from your face, you whispered a small ‘thank you.’
“let me take you on a date. maybe we can forget about all these hard things together? and even if things get more difficult i’m right here with you.”
“thank you.. i’m sorry i made things so hard for you. you look like shit.” you joke between stuffy nosed laughs.
“don’t forget you made me look like shit, how was i ever supposed to stop loving you?” he pouts.
“trick question, you were never supposed to stop. because i love you too.”
“i didn’t want to make an effort to try the impossible anyways.” woonhak smiled at you, fixing the hair that clung to the wet patches on your face before kissing your tears away, “let’s feel better together, yeah?”
© 2023 minkkumaz, all rights reserved
support your writers by reblogging + giving feedback! it is greatly encouraged and appreciated. thank you! → why feedback + reblogging is so important. ~
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#⋆｡˚ my works#boynextdoor#boynextdoor fluff#boynextdoor fanfic#boynextdoor imagines#boynextdoor woonhak#woonhak#kim woonhak#woonhak fluff#woonhak x reader#kim woonhak fluff#woonhak angst#kim woonhak angst#kim woonhak x reader#boynextdoor drabbles#boynextdoor scenarios#boynextdoor x reader
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dramatic rant, incoming.
whatever. OKAY. WHAT. EVER. /lh
hoky shit. listen to me- listen.... nobody is gonna be able. to take bkdk away from me, okay? NO. ONE! do you know how many times i got bullied for saying i ship bakudeku, bullied by my friends? and now its the most potentially, most heart throbbing, heartbreaking, most cinamtic fucking pair i have ever witnessed? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
no no, listen. listen. i have gone through countless ships, praying that they would be canon, because i saw how much potential they could have. how everything tied in so lovingly like a placed present under a box with a stick holding it up. a ruse. a obvious trap. but i fell for it. every. time.
and youre saying that after years of torment by people from antis to friends to peers, i was RIGHT? I WAS FUCKING RIGHT? i dont even give a FUCK if its romantic or not. i was right. bakugou and izuku are intertwined with eachother in a way that its artistically crafted and i was RIGHT. fuck YOU. youre telling me izuku "i will kill for kacchan" midoriya and katsuki "i would die for izuku" bakugou arent closer than just friends, i will laugh in your face. i am crazed, okay? i will LAUGH and keel over on the ground and wheeze until i cant breathe anymore.
it was so obvious from the get go. like honestly, it was. how izuku kept calling katsuki "kacchan" even though they hadnt been close friends in a long, long time. even dudebros cant even come up with an excuse. how can you excuse something like that? like seriously? if izuku really did hate bakugou why give him a fond nickname instead of a scathing "bakugou" everytime they interacted like the dudebros believed? and why did bakugou ALLOW it?
izuku imitating bakugou,
like this, a more obvious example. if izuku hated bakugou SO much, then why. WHY. HUH?
and this was early in to the show and manga. where bakugou hadnt apologized yet, and the tension between them was fucking awful.
now that we know izuku thinks highly towards kacchan, admires him, thinks kacchan is his shining light, his image of victory. we can piece it together. bit by bit. and it becomes clearer, and everybody who was talking crap and sending out death threats look like complete idiots. idiots.
so sorry for wanting to brag, but my bumbling adhd ass gets genuinely hurt when a friend comments that my ship sucks. and its been a long time coming letting all this out.
#smalltalk#rant#long post#mha#i wrote this post like so long ago i was filled with bitterness#my hero academia#bkdk#dkbk
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Part 6 really cements the theory for me. Instead of beomgyu liking her this entire time and oc actually being the on friendzoning, i think its more like he caught feelings on top of the strong love and care he already has for oc. i dont think he can top ocs love for him but he definitely loves her imo definitely (reasonably) stronger than what yeonjuns giving oc. also this whole never being satisfied with yeonjun makes me feel uneasy for him, a relationship like this would make anyone feel like shit and its clear he knows she still has feelings (i guess because shes starting to choose him over beomgyu he didnt drill her more about it during the breakfast scene?) . idk any sane person who would get into a relationship with someone clearly in love with someone else, which also makes me wonder his motives? like is he doing this just for the experience lol or does he genuinely like her enough to think this might work? i dont know its confusing to me, or maybe im taking this too seriously and i have to put on my fanfiction glasses 😂
As much as id love for gyu and oc to be together, because im just the biggest sucker for toxicity and a best friends to lovers storyline, phew this really proved to me how ingenious an ending like that would be. It just doesnt make sense no matter how many trials I run in my head of them being in a healthy, happy relationship. Everything leads to them losing their friendship if they started going out romantically which is so so heartbreaking to me 😭😭 I dont exactly know what made this click for me this specific chapter but god, is there even going to be a guy for her 🥲? And even if its Yeonjun, itll be a sad ending for even the yj supporters. Even if she learns to love him, i feel like youd allude to her having some part of her heart still loving gyu 😭
yeah yeonjun seems to be getting the short end of the stick isn't he? but maybe he really does hope she'd choose him? he's not pushing much right now because they've only been going out for a few weeks but who knows how he'll act later on? or maybe it really isn't that deep 😂 i did say that i'm in my wattpad era with this fic so don't expect deepness from me lmao
they could end up together at the end of the fic and break up later 😂😂😂😂 though it feels like they're gonna lose their friendship either way...
oc is so obsessed with gyu right now but you have to remember she lives with the guy. she sees him all the time even if in this chapter she says she hardly sees him, she still lives with him. who's to say in the future if she distances herself from him she won't move on?
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apocalypse byler part 10: senior prom scenario!
mike and will occupy the empty auditorium, seeing all the abandoned decorations that scatter the place. streamers are on the floor, balloons are deflated and the sign that says ‘HH SENIOR PROM’ is old and tattered, its one side hanging from the other.
the two boys take a minute walking around, to process the tragic image of a school event that never came to be. will picks up a lone decoration and tries to attach it to the wall with a somber smile on his face. mike on the other hand, looks at the display of empty tables and strokes his hand through the fabric.
‘i wonder how theyre doing.’
‘who?’ mike asks.
’the people. they were supposed to have their prom.’
‘yeah?’
‘so im just wondering how they are right now. so many memories could have been made. they were probably so excited, and it was stolen away, just like that. they didnt know any better either.’ will says, rubbing his fingers together inspecting specks of dust. ‘they must have been so confused… scared.’
‘its not your fault. we’re going to take everything back the way it was.’ mike says in an instant, as if he knew what will was gonna say. will looks back at mike, then to the streamers, and nods slowly.
‘yeah…you’re right. sorry.’
mike stares at will for a while until he clears his throat. ‘you ever had dances back in cali?’
will smiles, shrugging. ‘yeah, one time. it was a smaller event but it was fun.’
mike smiles back, but it quickly fades. ‘did you..manage to meet anyone?’ mike asks.
will chuckles, smirking at mike. ‘well fortunately for you…no. i had some girls who asked me, but i said no.’
mike crosses his arms and looks down with a grumpy look. ‘if it were you 4 years ago, youd be dancing with girls all night.’
will blushes. ‘you’re exaggerating. it was only 2 girls, anyway.’
mike walks to will with a teasing grin on his face. ‘Will the Heartbreaker.’ has a nice ring to it.’ will giggles, punching mike gently on his stomach. ‘i am not.’
’good,’ mike say softly behind will, making the other boy turn around. mike then wraps his arms around will’s waist and pulls him close, making him gasp. ‘i only want you breaking my heart.’
will’s smile drops. ‘..i dont want to break your heart at all.’
’i don’t mind if you did. especially how much of a dumbass i was, i kinda deserve it.’ mike says it jokingly, but will’s kicked puppy dog expression stays the same, making mike’s humerous demeanor drop immediately.
will looks into mike’s eyes, putting both of his hands on his cheek. ‘stop saying that. all you deserve is the best.’ he retorts.
’well… good thing i already have the best.’ mike says with the biggest shit eating grin as their faces draw closer, their foreheads touching.
‘god, you’re such a dork.’ will whispers, looking down. he moves his hands from mike’s cheeks to around his neck, pulling mike closer than he already was. ‘i dont think i can handle you during an actual prom date.’
’oh you wouldnt, byers. im gonna be the cheesiest goddamn date youll have.’
‘oh yeah?’
’yeah. i have plans.’ mike says smugly.
’you thought about it?’ will presses, with mike nodding. will’s curiosity was getting the best of him, and feels himself getting bold.
‘…what would you prefer our prom date be like?’
with mike’s hands around will’s waist and will’s around his neck, it didnt take long for them to start swaying their bodies together. there was no music, only the sound of their gentle breathing. for both of them, it was more than enough.
‘hmm. let’s see. i’d uh..pick you up from your house…’
’mhmmm?’ will hums, looking at mike with so much love. his mouth starts to hurt from smiling.
’id give you flowers.’ will scoffs and rolls his eyes. mike chuckles and continues.
‘… and a mixtape,’ will looks up at mike once again. ‘..of all the songs that reminded me of you when you were gone.’ the two boys smile at each other.
’and we’d take photos. id hold your hand. our moms would be all over us.’
will laughs in response. ‘we’d never make it to prom at that point.
mike giggles. ‘yeah.’
he notices will bite his lip and avoiding mike’s gaze. ‘whats up?’ he asks.
will loves the way mike wont let him have any thought unspoken.
‘would you want to do that to yourself, though..?’
mike furrows his eyebrows, still not getting at what will’s saying.
’would you want to be seen with me?’
mike stops in his steps, ceasing their swaying motion. will’s gaze was still averted, clearly fearful.
‘i just dont want you to feel uncomfortable. i dont wanna pressure you or feel like you have to be seen with me because-
mike puts his one hand on will’s face and brushes his thumb on his cheek.
‘will. i love being with you. and i want people to see me be with you. and if they have a problem with that?’
mike’s thumb gently lifts will’s chin up, making their eyes meet. ‘’then they can go to hell.’
will stays silent, taken aback by mike’s simple but impactful words. its as if his worries were washed away in an instant. not too long after, his eyes are flooding with tears.
‘…are you sure?’
mike sighs and kisses will’s forehead. ‘yes. when this is all over, i swear to god im taking you to prom. and not just prom, but dates too. we’ll listen to music together. i’ll introduce you properly to my parents. and all the things i said before wont just be a fantasy anymore. we’ll be out in public, where everyone can see us. i dont want to hide anymore, will.’ will’s lips curl up the more he hears mike talk.
mike looks at him with expectant eyes. ‘do you… feel the same way?’
’yeah!…yeah.’ will sniffs. ‘i do. id really like that.’
‘cool!’ mike replies, his voice cracking. the two boys start laughing together.
‘cool.’
mike stops laughing and looks at will in the eyes with a confident smile. ’remember, whatever happens..’
’..we’ll face it together.’
they smooch ❤️❤️❤️
#my take on the prom scenario!!#i just think itll be cute if they talked about it while the worlds gone to shit ❤️❤️#also established relationship byler heehoo#byler#writing#apocalypse byler#also note: HIGHLY inspire from vio*ntine from twdg where violet asked clem to dance 🥹#also did you guys notice the jopper parallel *wiggles eyebrows*
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Tag Game: Eight Shows to Get to Know Me
Tagged by @agent-p-94 Thanks for the tag! 🥰🥰
agent-p-94's post here
In order of nothing with added details no one asked for because I can't do anything without rambling on forever and I could talk about all these shows for literal hours (ask me to please, I'd love to):
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia: My chaotic comfort show. Been watching for years and years and its always good for some stupid laughs at crazy insane horrible people doing the most whack ass shit imaginable. And like so many episodes so like endless watchability.
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency: Watched for the first time in Aug 2020 and while it isn't currently as severe a hyperfixation and obsession as it was when I first watched it, its leveled out to a more stable and steady love and appreciation and like come on, the fandom is great. Ya'll are the best.
In the Flesh: This show is beautiful and heartbreaking and has a permanent place in my heart. I end up rewatching it basically every year just because I just have to. It always makes me cry.
Dead Like Me/Pushing Daisies/Hannibal: I'm just going to combine all three of these Bryan Fuller masterpieces that were all cancelled too soon to be fair. All of them are special in their own way and I adore the unique comedy, the snappy and intelligent dialogue, the irreverent and unique takes on death, and the eccentric and wild characters. (I never finished Wonderfalls, the other main Bryan Fuller show, so its not on the list sorry lol).
The Good Place: Such a good show. I went into it the first watched through (back when it was just the first season out) and had no idea what to expect and it just... I mean if you've seen it you know what the first season puts you through... and what looks like a silly dumb show about dumb bad people in the afterlife becomes this wonderful show about humans learning and growing and changing even after their lives are over. It's about our duty to be kind and understanding to other people, about finding ways to live with the gray parts of morality. A comedy show that talks about ethics and moral philosophy throughout the whole show without it feeling like a big boring slog. And ends in such a beautiful way that makes my heart ache and makes me cry just remembering it.
Community: This show is great. It's hilarious. I love the characters. I love the like theme episodes and dumb comedy and the catch phrases and wacky nonsense. It's just fun and great.
Schitt's Creek: This is a show that's just fun to stick on in the background now that I've rewatched like multiple times and know the whole story. I love seeing the characters grow and learn and get closer to each other. The way that they love each other as a family and end up spreading that love to the town, how they find their places and its just a beautiful, silly, and heartwarming show. (Will never be over the loss of Ted and Alexis. They were so special together.)
Tied for the final place: Parks and Recreation, Merlin, Doctor Who: These are shows that had a major impact on me, but I haven't actually rewatched in a few years. I used to do so many watches of Parks and Rec and I still have a love for the show and Benslie is a true OTP. Merlin is great and I'll rewatch episodes here and there but it can be a bit of a slog getting through entire seasons especially knowing how it all ends (😭). And Doctor Who, I'll say probably was the show that made me end up here (on tumblr). I watched in 2012, freshman year of college not really knowing anything about fandoms or like forum places like this, ended up on Instagram to check out more Doctor Who pics and memes and saw a ton of screenshots of tumblr and then finally gave in to make my own account in 2013. And now it's 10 years later and I'm a disaster. So thanks a lot Doctor Who...
Tagging... uhhhhhhh.... idk @hbdttg @trash-mammall @mowi0205 @definesupposedtobe @lavinialost (but like no pressure just ignore this if you dont wanna) plus anyone else that wants to do it!
#tag game#eight shows#i feel like these are all pretty like current but also the most lastingly impactful shows i like#theres some others ive gotten sporadically obsessed over but like kind of faded out to not being in my brain much#but like i feel like i pretty consistently come back to these ones#and i do love them all#i wish i had a million hours and a million attentions so i could rewatch them all#my brain has been refusing to let me focus on any sort of media content that is not scrolling on my phone#but im pretty sure its becuase work has been a lot recently and i just dont have the energy to focus once i get home#and probably also because my brain knows i need to get my taxes done and im not allowed to do watching things until then#and thats been like.... over a month that ive been intending to come home and finish my taxes and just... havent.#need to do them tomorrow... or i guess today now...
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Diaspro: A Brief Analysis
Time to give my unqualified 2 cents about Diaspro and how she could have been better
Like all my rambles, this is q long and all over the place (even tho i tried to organise it)
Note: This is my personal opinion! If you like her the way she is, ok good
Diaspro is haughty, spoilt but her primary role is as a love rival for Bloom due to her love for Sky.
She tends to be simply a thorn in Sky and Bloom's side in the show. There are very brief moments where her motivations are expanded upon more, but she mostly just wants to get in Bloom's way bc of a common love interest.
She falls into a lot of stereotypical love rival cliches but like many other people, I think she has potential to be an interesting character
While it is implied that she is to marry Sky because of political reasons, I believe she does actually like him romantically. Being a part of royalty is just an additional perk.
The comics also show Diaspro's parents passively pressuring her to marry Sky to be queen, but she's more firm about marrying Sky bc SHE LIKES HIM, and not bc of the kingdom.
(Ik the 'training to be a perfect bride' scene exists, but I think these two ideas are not mutually exclusive. I think she does genuinely like Sky, but is *also* influenced to her parents' propaganda. Both up the stakes and force Diaspro to double down on chasing Sky. I think making her like Sky also gives her more agency as a character)
Ik this is a v common trope, but I like the similarities between Diaspro and Sky. Both are fighting to be with the person they love, but Diaspro is on the losing end here and trying to claw her way back.
An additional layer Diaspro is given is that she is Sky's childhood friend, and thus has a longer history and an assumed closer relationship with him. This is part of Bloom's insecurity in her relationship with Sky, similar to Krystal and Helia.
This is also probably the reason why Sky is being more polite with Diaspro than he needs to be. He holds her in high regard not just because she is from a powerful family, but mostly bc he's doing it out of friendship.
However, this friendship aspect rarely expanded on beyond that in the show. Sky treats Diaspro mostly like an obligation he owes to his parents, rather than having an internal dilemma. Except maybe that scene where he gets very upset that his parents are caring more about political appearances/her parents' influence rather than actually caring about Diaspro in S2.
This is expanded more in comic #31 (spoilers) where Diaspro falls horribly ill/bedridden and the only thing that seems to make her feel better is Sky's company (yes ik dont ask just accept it).
Sky feels a great sense of guilt, as there is word going around that Diaspro's illness is caused by his rejection/heartbreak. While very hesitant, he contemplates marrying her so she can get better. I assume he only considers this due to their close friendship with each other.
(Look, ik this sounds dumb. But in Sky's defense, in the magic world anything is possible. So who knows at this point??)
I feel this friendship element was not used to its full potential in the show. I rly wish there was a montage of Diaspro and Sky hanging out as kids or smth. That could give better insight as to why Diaspro likes him, as compared to "she just likes him" yknow??? She seems like a very firm person who clearly knows what she wants and would not tolerate getting married to someone she disliked/only marrying for a position.
There HAS to be a catalyst as to why Diaspro likes Sky. And I wanna see them be actual childhood friends!!! This background knowledge make readers empathise with Diaspro's emotional pain (beyond that throwaway line where she said she trained her whole life to be his wife) that she got her longtime childhood crush get taken away by some random girl who met him for 2 days.
It would also be interesting for the viewers to get a childhood flashback from both Diaspro's perspective and Sky's perspective just to see the differences in how they perceive their rs up to this point. It would also help viewers empathise with Diaspro more, while also understanding Sky's viewpoint.
Maybe a bit cliche and impossible, but I also want the final conclusion to be Sky fighting Diaspro instead of Bloom. Mostly bc I wanna see the dynamic between them (e.g I think Diaspro would hesitate to physically harm Sky, giving him the chance to win) but also bc this conflict is for these two to resolve, not Bloom.
Both of them have similar objectives but are on opposing sides, and it's up to Sky to be firm and prove his resolve by striking down Diaspro. In her moment of weakness when she falls and loses, he offers her a hand to signal a truce.
Very cliche, I know. But I think its a good way to involve Sky in this issue, instead of him appearing as a bystander while Bloom fights out his issues by herself. I also think it helps make Sky seem like a more likeable chara (even if the forgiveness act is cliche, cliche suits Sky anyway lol)
Diaspro's decision to take Sky's hand can also be different depending on what direction you wanna go for her.
If you want her to get a redemption like me and cleanly resolve the plot, she takes Sky's hand and comes to the understanding that she ultimately wants him to be happy and her doing this only worsens their friendship. She basically moves on gracefully and decides to dedicate herself to her kingdom instead.
(Maybe potential to slot a dubious enchantix transformation here? Idk she sacrifices her own goals and saves Sky from 3 more seasons of turmoil or smth)
If you want her to be a badass bitch and still wanna see her fight it out with Bloom, she takes Sky's hand but takes advantage of his vulnerability to turn him into a crystal statue. The "If I can't have you, no one else can." resolution, if you will.
I personally like the redemption route, but it's up to you. Ik a lot of people really want her to snap and lose it.
But what happens to Diaspro after that? Obviously, if you took the badass bitch route, Sky severs his friendship with her forever, like in S3. I would ideally like for Diaspro to never be seen again after that to show that there are consequences for her actions.
I'm gonna mention Comic #31 (again) that takes an interesting route with her redemption.
Diaspro has been rejected by Sky, after a long period of absence she returns to Magix and she needs books from the Alfea library. Bloom is paranoid about Diaspro attempting to steal back Sky
However, when Diaspro bumps into the winx and the specialists at a cafe, it turns out she's back bc she has decided to dedicate herself to study how to be a good ruler for her kingdom (thus Alfea books). She makes it clear that she has no intention on stealing Sky and Bloom is relieved, inviting her to sit with the rest of her friends. I think this is really sweet, bc I want them to be friends.
However, due to a spell from the Trix, Diaspro falls very ill. Sky often visits her without telling Bloom. This causes Bloom to grow worried and her insecurity resurfaces. Sky mentions to Brandon that there is no cure and the only thing that makes Diaspro feel better is his company. Sky hesitantly contemplates marrying Diaspro to help her illness. Bloom confronts Diaspro at her mansion, but is hesitant to tell her the problem.
Ok this is where the part I like comes in.
Diaspro is perceptive enough to pinpoint Bloom's worries, asking if she is worried that Sky is visiting her. She clarifies that she is not faking her illness, and that Sky only comes here to help her and nothing else. She also states that she does genuinely feel better when Sky is around. Bloom apologises.
Previously when Sky visits her, Diaspro also asks if Bloom knows about him visiting, Sky tells her not to worry about that (its ultimately Sky's own problem, bc he's so dense he decides not to tell Bloom and goes to visit Diaspro in secret, making Bloom worried. Im gonna kill him.)
I like that Diaspro is actively conscious of the way she makes Bloom feel. Obviously in the show she's very aware of Bloom's insecurities and takes advantage of it, but I like the more good-natured twist in this. The fact she also reassures Bloom that she has no ulterior intentions is really nice.
Ok back to the story. Bloom receives a call from Timmy that Sky might be in trouble, his ship has crashed while on a mission and the rest of the specialists are on their way.
Diaspro overhears this and insists on coming. Bloom urges her to rest instead as Diaspro is so weak she can barely stand or walk. However, Diaspro insists on following her, as she wants to help Sky and repay him the favour. Bloom helps hold Diaspro as they hobble out of her house.
Diaspro instantly feels better exiting the house as the Trix's curse is lifted. Bloom and Diaspro then fly to the crash site, use both their powers to visualise where Sky is located, and save him together.
Even though the conclusion of the story implies that Diaspro is back to her old self, I rly like this nice version of Diaspro. I like that she is genuinely concerned for Sky's safety and willing to take great pains to help him. I also think her working together with Bloom to accomplish a shared objective of helping Sky is really cute.
I think this is a viable way to continue Diaspro's relevance in the story, without her being antagonistic. Bc honestly, its kinda annoying that she keeps coming back only bc the showrunners wanna shoehorn another thing to disrupt Sky and Bloom's relationship, and they were lazy to think of anything else. I want Diaspro to have a purpose too!!! I want her to be a character who can learn and grow....
I think this also opens up a potential friendship between Diaspro and Bloom. I am a huge sucker for the dynamic of Diaspro being stubborn and "You can't stop me from going!!!" and Bloom sighing, going "Ok fine..." and then helping her.
Comic #15 also very briefly touches on this, where they get captured by a dragon and have to escape its lair together. They don't really share many moments of friendship there, but Bloom saves Diaspro's life and they have a small talk about their rivalry. (Bloom is more magnanimous in her behaviour towards Diaspro here lol)
Diaspro begrudgingly thanks Bloom for saving her but states that they will return to being enemies when they escape the lair. Once again, might be just me being partial to the "begrudging thank you" trope where they slowly become frenemies after that, but I think that moment was quite cute.
I think having a separate friendship could divorce her from the idea that she's in the show just because of Sky, and make her a less one dimensional character (aka not just Sky's Ex). Having connections and relationships with the rest of the Winx/Specialists could also be good.
As proposed by other people (Rus) , she could also bond with Aisha and Stella given their harsh upbringing as Princesses. Or yknow, maybe she could be with Chimera as a weird pseudo smug older sibling (parent manipulation bonding lol). I'm sure the writers can come up with something, there are so many possibilities.
(Idk where to put this, but her King Liason's outfit in S5 was so cool, idk why they got rid of it? Seeing her lead an army or be a commander for her kingdom when the Winx fight a big bad villain would be so cool.)
Anyway, I want better for Diaspro than to be shoved into the same love triangle every season like she's stuck in groundhog day. I'm not sure if S9 will try to be super faithful to the original, but if its a fresh reboot I hope they try harder with Diaspro.
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i think that maybe we could be getting all of the girls and need as soundtracks for a coming out documentary like how we got only the young in miss americana but that could just be me being insane over them and wanting to hear them really badly
Ugh, I would love that !!!!
I'm thinking the film she's been hinting at is a documentary. And like in the bejeweled mv, didn't she hint that 'exile' was ending? I think this means that karlie is on board with coming out publically and that we're going to get lover era this summer for pride month maybe.
I just can't imagine taylor is comfortable being closeted, I can't imagine she would actively choose that life. I wish I could be openly queer but I can't and that choice hurts me inside everyday. I just dont know if I can look at lover era and think she just changed her mind.
I cant listen to midnight rain, the great war, and right where you left me or dear reader and think she wants this life for herself. I think she knows now that she'll have a fandom no matter what and I think she put out folklore and evermore as a strategic move, because well karlie will definitely listen to them especially with Betty being given special attention.
I think karlie hearing Betty inspired her to reach out and let go of the hatchet. I would love to see them have a public and joint project in this regards because I think the documentary would touch on many important aspects like... queerness, mental health, toxic relationships, and even maybe her ED in more depth. But I also know that taylor wants to be more private nowadays but I don't know if she wants to be private about being forcibly closeted though.
I think the amount of anger she has towards her old label is way bigger than just losing her masters and like if I was to view Taylor's life as a novel, I feel like the masters was almost the inciting incident in a way because I think this situation began in 2014 or 2015, way longer than we think it did. And like idk, if I'm listening to her music correctly- it tells us that we should be focused on more than just the masters situation itself. Like the great war and hoax being 2 sides of the same coin to me is just so heartbreaking to me. I don't know what other I can interpret these songs.
I'm of the belief that if taylor didn't want us talking about it (i.e. her SA) she wouldn't sing about it, so that's kind of where I'm judging her boundaries on what she's okay with us talking about her life online. I think she understands we're reading her lyrics closely, so I think she's been more metaphorical and purple prosey with her lyricism on purpose.
And I think those metaphors just really add so much depth to her songs, like Betty being fictional is great and all but betty being a fictionalized version of events based on a real human is even greater. Like, how do you just dismiss the betty and james connection to taylor and karlie so quickly. It's the kind of thing where once you know, you can't unknow.
And idk, the amount of maturity in her recent albums and especially midnights (as a gaylor who can understand every song on that album accurately, I don't understand why people are calling it mid or her worst album or whatever and I realize that the poppy sound really makes people stop thinking) just points to taylor gaining the courage and strength to hold herself accountable + own up to her past mistakes enough to wear she was able to cross that great divide between the two of them in order to get what she wants. She truly is a mastermind, honestly.
Like, I think she wants to be queer because she's been surrounding herself with very political and very queer people left and right since 2017. I think she wants to be the first bisexual woman billionaire musician film director. Like I think she wants to leave a legacy that is more than just music and that's why she's been branching out and being political and just aligning herself with queer women and black people.
She's making a conscious effort to diversify her surroundings and I applaud her for that. I think she's really tired of her old fandom and her old image and she wants to be her true authentic self because she's just been acting very bisexual very loudly all over the place.
I just would love the heartbreak prince as a documentary. And I would love to hear all of the girls and need because I know they're about Joe's support of her and her desire for him which is exactly the kind of bisexual representation the world needs. 😉
But yeah, I just realllllllllllllllly wanna hear those songs anon because I just always want more lover recognition always. A truly unparalleled era.
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I’m here to scream with you about chapter 35 because I read it yesterday after work, I wrote this and then my dumb brain forgot to send it 💀😂 sorry if it is all over the place I read it like at 2 am and wrote this right after almost falling asleep sjksksksks
Omg first of all sibi, you once again made me cry so much, THIS WAS HEARTBREAKING IN SO MANY WAYS 😭 like how do you manage to write emotions so vividly because why does your writing makes me truly feel the emotions your characters are feeling??!! It’s insane! Especially for the latest chapters the PAIN sibi THE ANGST gets bigger and I just SUFFER jskskskskksks like for real you are such an amazing talented writer!
I did see some oc slander in your asks and I just want to tell those anons “come outside, my fists just want to talk ☺️” because WE DONT ACCEPT OC SLANDER IN THIS HOUSE, especially now that she’s going through so much 😔 like pls let her be unhinged for some chapters this woman’s life and reality has been upside down from the moment she stepped into that damn university, her mind has been manipulated, she’s been tortured, she’s been HUNTED DOWN and almost killed by two freaking psychos (I’m sorry Mimi you are good now a whole sweetie) while her boyfriend just watched, she had to be there for Tae in his grieving so he didn’t loose himself, had to watch him killing and distance himself from her for it (just like Tae is doing now for her), she had to see her whole family almost die because of some magical bitches AND had one messing with her brain trying to end her, and now? SHE LOST ONE OF THE LOVES OF HER LIFE, LET HER HAVE HER UNHINGED MOMENT, she HAD to break at some point guys it was just a matter of time and circumstance, it would be the same if the one dying was Kook or Tae or any of the other members of her little family, she fought Yoongi just as hard for Tae in SA now it’s just a different kind of craziness because she has more knowledge I don’t see it as favouritism at all she just wants her family back complete 🥺😭 I truly love how unhinged she’s acting right now because you know what? I GET HER I too would go completely crazy trying to save my loved ones by any means necessary, I do have to say GIRL YOU WILL GET YOUR YOONGI BACK PLEASE DONT KILL YOURSELF IN THE PROCESS 😭 like the part where Tae found her almost dead in the middle of the hallway BROKE me 😭 my poor boy he must have been so terrified when he found her with her heart barely beating 😭😭😭😭 I can help but think about how terrible their grieving would be if they loose her too, like Kookie loosing both his lovers would destroy him completely and Tae loosing once again one of the only people who bring him true happiness goddd why do I do that to myself😭 at that part where she was “dreaming” about Yoongi I was so suspicious because it was like “this dream feels weird why everything is so calm why is he saying that she’s finally there, please tell me she isn’t dying what’s happeninghhshssjsj” and she was indeed dying from exhaustion 💀💀💀💀💀💀 and the part where she’s taking care of Yoongi???? HEARTBREAK if you look for that word in the dictionary that scene appears as an example 😭😭😭😭
And also Tae has been such a supportive boyfriend he’s for real the sweetest bean that also deserves a break, just like her, it broke my heart when he broke and told her that he felt she didn’t fight for him and instead fell in love with Yoongi while he was in prison BECAUSE WE KNOW THATS NOT TRUE like I know he said he didn’t mean it but I do think that maybe at some point in SA he felt that for like one second and then buried it deep inside to never think it again and now resurfaced as an outbursts of emotion, stress and preoccupation for her that he could control, like we all say things we don’t mean when we are under stress especially the emotional kind 😔
And then Namjoon that motherfucker jsksks look as a Joonie biased Army (my wise sweet nature loving man that acts like a little puppy my love) that shit was so disturbingly hot??? I hate youuuu jskskskskjsksksks at some point the little voice in my head was like “you know what I’m a weak bitch for this man let’s get that evil vampire dick and destroy the world girl” jskskksksks but miss oc YOU WILL NOT GET ANYTHING OUT OF HIM BY TORTURING HIM BECAUSE THE PSYCO GETS OFF ON IT HE LOVES IT, you have to hit him where it hurts, his “superior” immortality, threaten him with mortality and he will probably start behaving at least a little bit, the fucker more jail for him Immediately! 🥴
Jiminie baby he’s so sweet 😭😭😭😭😭 trying to make oc feel better by telling her the story with Yoongi 😭😭😭 I love how he’s so straight forward with her and has no qualms in telling her that yeah she’s hurting but at the same time she’s hurting the people that loves her and has to try to be better for them while still looking for a cure, AND THE WAY HE HUGGED KOOK TO COMFORT HIM??!!! BABY IS ALREADY SO PART OF THE FAMILY THEY ARE ON HUGGING TERMS I LOVE THAT FOR MY JIMIM 🥹🥹🥹🥹
And finally, YES to Kookie for being like “yeah no, we are a team in this relationship, I know you need a break and all but we both know that won’t happen unless our Yoongi is back and I miss and want him back too so let’s get some answers with Meredith, fuck the vacations at the beach 😤” THATS MY BABY! YOU GO KOOKIE MY LOVE!
That’s for now Sibi I’ll be back later after I read the new chapter!!!!! I’m so excited to know what happens with Meredith!!!!
-Shy Anon
FADJSFJADS I'M SO HAPPY THAT I MANAGE TO MAKE YOU GUYS EXPERIENCE THE EMOTIONS OF THE CHARACTERS AAAAH HEHEHHE 💜💜💜
like pls let her be unhinged for some chapters this woman’s life and reality has been upside down from the moment she stepped into that damn university, her mind has been manipulated, she’s been tortured, she’s been HUNTED DOWN and almost killed by two freaking psychos (I’m sorry Mimi you are good now a whole sweetie) while her boyfriend just watched, she had to be there for Tae in his grieving so he didn’t loose himself, had to watch him killing and distance himself from her for it (just like Tae is doing now for her), she had to see her whole family almost die because of some magical bitches AND had one messing with her brain trying to end her, and now? SHE LOST ONE OF THE LOVES OF HER LIFE, LET HER HAVE HER UNHINGED MOMENT, she HAD to break at some point guys it was just a matter of time and circumstance,
PREACH IT BESTIE FUCKING PREACH IT!!! I love that she's so unhinged rn like yes go off queen, you deserve to have your lil crazy streak 💅🏻💅🏻💅🏻
it would be the same if the one dying was Kook or Tae or any of the other members of her little family, she fought Yoongi just as hard for Tae in SA now it’s just a different kind of craziness because she has more knowledge I don’t see it as favouritism at all she just wants her family back complete 🥺😭
THANK YOU THIS!! like! I remember people hating on her for fighting Yoongi all the time in SA like besties, we were all there when the story evolved lmaoao by now we all should know that she is a mighty stubborn and resiliant fighter when her family is involved fjadsjf
I can help but think about how terrible their grieving would be if they loose her too, like Kookie loosing both his lovers would destroy him completely and Tae loosing once again one of the only people who bring him true happiness goddd why do I do that to myself😭
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PLEAS ENOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOO
I do think that maybe at some point in SA he felt that for like one second and then buried it deep inside to never think it again and now resurfaced as an outbursts of emotion, stress and preoccupation for her that he could control, like we all say things we don’t mean when we are under stress especially the emotional kind 😔
YES THANK YOU I love this analysis so much and I can definitely see this being the reason for his outburst LIKE YES OMFG 😭😭
“you know what I’m a weak bitch for this man let’s get that evil vampire dick and destroy the world girl”
HAHAHHAHAH MOOD HAHAHAHHAH
I love how he’s so straight forward with her and has no qualms in telling her that yeah she’s hurting but at the same time she’s hurting the people that loves her and has to try to be better for them while still looking for a cure,
YES I LOVE THIS SO MUCH ABOUT HIM when I decided to give him a redemption arch, the most important thing for me was that he won't his straightforwardness and "I WILL be rude if I have to" attitude so I'm happy that you like HIM BECAUSE I LOVE HIM TOO :(
And to end it all of *chants* Kookie kookie kookie!!!
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I dont have an ao3 account so id like to drop a comment in your askbox if thats alright. With that being said the change of pov was SO good, keeping us in the dark as to what kazuya's feelings are about all this (tho we can kinda guess thanks to the previous chapters) especially on jin now that they have proper interactions, and its also kinda funny how quiet he is when we're not in his head. All while everything about jin is downright heartbreaking, the scene of him confronting his father over being late is my fav part of his chapter, cant wait for him to eventually realize that kaz isnt either "just closed off and not particularly mean" nor "uncaring and straight up cruel" but a little bit of both. Its also interesting how, from an outside point of view, kaz's self-interested pragmatism could ALMOST be read as kindness, he DID find jun's phone and he DID gave jin his own phone to contact lee. Speaking of, considering how empty that phone is save from messages from lee and jun, i wonder if jin is gonna find the pictures his mother send his father, im glad at least those photos didnt die along with jun and her phone :)
In any case, this fic makes me insane, Im eagerly waiting the next chapter, its really good👍
no problem taking comments in ask form! tho it is easier for me to lose track of them, and i think you can comment as a (named) guest on ao3? unless theyve changed that
but yo i have been thinking about this ask ALL DAY DHFJK, youve picked up on SO MUCH of the little stuff ive been laying down, youre the first person ive seen point out many of these! kazuya's intentions being easily misconstrued from the outside, jin having him HALF pegged, the pictures..... know that i very rarely bring things up without them contributing something, at least when it comes to my writing. legit started beaming and pointing at my phone screen reading parts of this comment - certain parts here will be VERY important, but i wont say which ones ;)
going thru the rest of the comment, ty so so much, writing jin's grief was something i spent a lot of time on, and us knowing kazuya's general thought process up to this point is why i switched when i did. we understand what he's thinking, what JIN thinking about all this? both sides are equally important, so i wanted to get jin's pov as early as i could.
and i agree that its almost funny how silent kazuya can be when we aren't reading his crazy little thoughts sdhfjk. when i write him interacting with people i often have to go "how many times can i have him go quiet before it gets freaking annoying," but im trying to write him a little more reserved! hes doing a lot of observation through much of this fic, he thinkin CONSTANTLY, but im trying to balance his internal and external voices as well as i can. i actually have a joke with my beta thats just "SPEAK, MOTHERFUCKER," cause he employs the silent, impassive deathglare so much 💀
ty SO SO MUCH i was glowing at lunch while reading this, thank you for your support, compliments, and everything else! ♥
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i've been postponing my homestuck read for days now, focusing on other work and stuff. it was only yesterday that i stop doing my little break. here's my thoughts :
-post scratch world are fascinating. everyone is 15 and the parents are now the kids and vice versa. it seems like a mix between alternia and earth! Lusus exists but concentrated on jake's island, i've seen a lot of callbacks to earlier dialogues and certain troll only things like the quadrants being mentioned, and im pretty sure the rival baking empire was headed by the troll empress who found her planet destroyed.
-anyway, the parents?!!?!?! theyre now the kids? how does that work? dirk and roxy did mention their parents are dead so maybe the sburb alpha version of dave and rose just isnt in the picture but man i wanna see i wanna i wanna see. and now everything i know about the alpha kids makes me want to go back and look back on the beta kids interaction with their parents to go Hmmmmmmmmmmm
-that being said it would be extra screwy is the alpha guardians (grown up beta kids) are actually still alive theyre just absent cunts so the alpha kids resent them and believe the real ones are dead. Oh roxy, just wait until you see your child / mother.
-my thoughts on jane crocker : heartbreaking. the AU version of your favorite beta kid is a billionare 😭. to be fair all of them becomes rich kids in this alpha timeline lol. Okay jokes aside, im very concerned for her and use of crocker tech. Im with dirk and roxy on this. She's a pretty pleasant fellow though. Most normal person out of the crew. There is something very sad about them. Like, they dont get to have a semblance of a normal life or even participate in society for reasons related to the game before the game even arrived. Theyre prepped for this one grand adventure only and its more traumatizing than actually fun. if they won, the world still ends.
-roxy is so. she reminds me of my neighbors' kid who bragged about drinking CT (a local very strong alcoholic drink) but a girl genius. im just fascinated in general. a rogue of void? sleepwalking? owns many cats? she would have been a popular wizardposter on tumblr. i can tell her favorite banned wizard council spell is greater baja blast.
-but mostly im interested in the areas she sleepwalked in. im pretty sure i saw dead dreamself terezi or nepeta and karkat with a knight of blood godtier outfit but no eyes, indicating he's dead. and ofc gamzee and equius but he's still alive. wait he's wearing glasses so i have no idea. I thought this is one of those dream bubbles thing but im even more weirded out with dead godtier karkat. is the void is more of a place for abandoned possibilities? or did i just mistook things over here? rose was there but somehow thats to be expected. she's trying to awaken roxy right? what will roxy do with her access to the void? what will she stole from the depths of the abyss?
-and dirk. wonder what he finally saw at the skies of derse. he's the prince of heart right? the only heart player i know is nepeta and we never really see her powers in action. i cant wait to see whats in store for him. also, he's actually gay? AND A BRONY???? A BRONY??? i mean yea he fucking love puppets but we knew that since act 1. i have no idea how he became friends with everybody like he cares but he's also abrasive as hell to everyone, esp when he likes the guy a LOT. im so sorry for jake.
-jake is a lot more naive than john. which is saying something. and an accomplishment because he's like constantly hunted by literal monsters and death robots. everyday he's fighting demons barehanded but stay silly. i wonder how jade and jake could even get to know each other like, theyre not even in the same timeline.
-and UU. who the fuck are they? is it lord english minions trapping the kids? or what here? They look nice and cheerful but im very skeptical here. couldnt wait to see more of them
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My Reality vs Your Reality
DEMENTIA=HELL
One of the hardest things Ive had to witness over the past few years was my gram battling dementia. Dementia really is a ones own personal hell. Imagine being trapped in your own reality and people telling you that what youre seeing isnt really, making you seem like the crazy one..when really its the brain literally lying to you. For the past few years weve been taking care of my gram and decided to place her in at home hospice care last year, since then her health has declined in the past few months. Imagine seeing someone a few weeks ago being able to walk without assistance and do other things without help and then suddenly no longer being able to do those things with help. Its absolutely heartbreaking and I dont wish what were going through on anybody. Ive never knew how bad dementia could be until I saw my gram have an psychiatric episode last week that lasted for 24hrs. It was so heartbreaking having to explain to her that what she was seeing wasnt real. Dementia is evil. It will literally take someone you love and turn them into a completely different person. The hardest part for me was watching her call a dog that didnt exist to show itself to us to prove that she wasnt crazy, even going as far as petting her comforter like it was a dog. So far gone into her reality and not understanding why we didnt understand her. I cant imagine what that must be like, seeing something and being told it doesnt exist and just being completely confused. The visons and hallucinations continue, no matter how many different meds they try. It really doesnt feel right lying to your loved one that you dont see what they see and that it doesnt exist, so we took a trip into her reality. The dog was found by its owner that came to our door, the cat was let outta the house, the people in the hallway left, the little girl on her bed.....I dunno about that one. Easter was Thanksgiving, its crazy how the brain can trick you into believing things because its literally dying, almost like having a bad trip but without the drugs. We, as a family have come to the difficult decision to put her into a facility, as she now requires 24 hr care and care that we can no longer provide. It doesnt feel right, but I do believe that my gram is her transitioning phase to end of life. They have taken her off of most of her meds now and are only giving what she needs for pain now. Im literally grieving someone who is still alive because of an evil, incurable disease. It doesnt feel right, but we know that we must do whats best for her and her safety. Shes the last remaining grandparent I have and at 93, I think shes lived a pretty damn good life, not to mention how many times shes cheated death, but we can only do that so many times. Death comes for all of us, whether were ready for it or not, I just want her to find peace and not suffer anymore, no more pain.
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hi long time mutual, I know it's probably pretty obvious from my posting, but I finished aa6 a few days ago and I wasn't expecting to come out of it a slightly incoherent mess that keeps trying to rotate all its flaws into something sensible, I would appreciate you sharing some thoughts or opinions on it or recommending good fanfic to read about it (you don't have to, though). Thank you for looking at this 💗
hooooooooooough boy okay SO i saw this ask in my notifs and immediately ran to grab my laptop so i can actually write a response you are in for a RIDE you've activated my unskippable cutscene i could go on and on and on forever about aa6 it is everything to me
first off: what flaws. its like, on par with every other aa game erhghdflhk theyve all got a couple; people just dont like aa5/6 and nitpick it way too much its exhausting ffjgh
second: *slaps roof of khura'in* [SCREECHES]
i have so many headcanons and worldbuilding ideas about khura'in that the game only barely covers/implies/isnt able to show in the limited "only there for half the game" timeframe, not only about the judicial system but also about culture and religion and food and language and climate and--
im gonna put a read more.
Nahyuta Sahdmadhi. bottom text. hi this guy is ourple! and very precious to me hes SO special i am holding him tightly but also what is 🆙 buddy whadda hell.
so the wiki says he's a "childhood friend" of apollo's and lists Dhurke as his "foster father" but also like. he was raised by that man for his formative years. thats his dad. yuty is his brother. very very VERY much so. ga'ran literally refers to them as brothers. yuty says "our father". idk what the wiki isn't seeing theyre brothers and i love their dynamic so much
that being said! their entire dynamic hinges on the fact that neither of them have seen each other since they were aged in the single digits, half a lifetime ago. theyre practically strangers. and that shit is so fascinating to me because you have to realise that theyve changed so much over the last thirteen or so years that theyre practically unrecognisable as the kid the other grew up with. its heartbreaking
see also: how bad do you have to fuck up for all three of your kids to call you by your first name
i am utterly enamoured by how much this game gives you in terms of this family dynamic. Apollo justice can't catch a break. first your sister (not that he knows but he certainly feels like she is) gets fuckin arrested on charges of murder and then you find out the prosecutor for it is your brother. and you're like. oh okay thats weird why's he a prosecutor isnt the DCA what we-- excuse me he what.
look. i think yuty in court is hilarious. he, a monk of a religion that wouldnt have an afterlife or hell simply due to the existence of spirits and channelling. and he spouts all that bullshit and nobody calls him out on it because what are you gonna do? tell the foreigner he's not allowed to talk about his beliefs? apollo, dont be rude he's a guest, athena says. apollo glares across the courtroom, knowing he doesn't believe a single word coming out of his own mouth.
yuty in court also has this subtle difference in demeanour between western and khura'inese courts. he's a little more lax in america i swear on every god out there nobody believes me when i say this but i swear it exists.
despite being highly ranked in the faith, or at least held in higher regard due to his status as both a prosecutor and someone close to the Khura'in royal family; nahyuta also has a lot of respect for the sciences? like. despite the fact that the séance is the only thing needed in khura'inese courts to convict someone, brings ema over to investigate? he's slowly and surely working against the ga'ran regime, but he can't do it openly because of the threat of rayfa's safety.
thing is, inga did in fact love her as his own daughter, so i think she would've been safe in some way, which makes everything else feel all the more meaningless. yuty practically gave up in those last few years, you can tell in the way dhurke spoke of him to apollo and how he wants to save him, dhurke blames himself entirely for how distant yuty ended up from him, and how he got stuck in ga'ran's web
the final case is meant to feel hopeless, it's such a moment, its the first time we see apollo break in the whole trilogy (bar the off-screen yell over the loss of Clay in 5-4) and he barely pulls himself back together.
but apollo has mr wright by his side during that. nahyuta, on the other side of the courtroom, slowly coming to the same realisation, the same breaking point, has nobody. theyre stuck on opposite sides of the courtroom, ga'ran is viewing it as a triumph, the Dragon is finally dead, and his sons cannot reach for each other, they cannot comfort each other in this time.
Nahyuta's line here? the first time he ever refers to his brother in-game by his first name? the broken, quiet, "a...pol....lo"? YEAH. girlies when i say i cracked
im just saying shit ekdxjghk this is getting LONG i have entire essays in my head if you want to hear more i am literally always down to do so i didn't say much abt the american side of things but GOD DAMN the magical turnabout lives rentfree in my braiiim im growing musheroomes thinking about ittttt
If you liked storyteller and want more 6-4 content may i direct you over to my friend @ashe-hallows
Now. fics.
if you want to read abt rayf pollo truce and yuty trying to navigate around being siblings together, and a prank war, please read my friend @echoing-sounds 's work "this means war (a lesson in bonding)"
my friend @amamillalatortilla 's works, notably "call back to reality", a short AU where during 6-5 yuty gets shot (he's fine, prommy)
she's also written plenty more aa6 fics for sicktember !
between us & then, by pinkstar14. i read this as it was being uploaded, like. i'd click a new chapter and see the number go up. this is everything to me its so much i adore it holy shit it makes me turn into the embodiment of the girlbypool.jpg its just. a bad situation getting worse and worse and you dont see the resolution until the games bc its a prequel lord help me
(also shameless plugs of my own aa6 fics below uwu)
give me two damn minutes (and I'll be fine) , my take on the sibling reveal. if you're going to read any of my fics please let it be this one waugh (this is here bc its set 5 years post aa6 btw lol, and references it a couple times)
or try some of my sicktembers!
unyeilding, unwavering, understanding, in which rayfa's sick, yuty's worried, and apollo is far to perceptive about the real reasons underlying it
who'll save you when you fall?, in which yuty faints, and his siblings try to get him to take better care of himself
awake, awake, you children bold, set after the river incident, just some dhurke and datz coparenting
I have some others too, set at various points both during and post game (and including ema!) but these are my personal faves
aaaaaaaaallrighty! im gonna stop here edfgjshgfjdgdfkgh but please i adore aa6 if you ever want to talk about it i'll be very happy to listen !
#ask !#i dont have a consistent ask tag and i cannot for the life of me remember what i've used before#shouting and pointing: the game#echo's unhinged hours#im putting it in there bc i certainly took like. over an hour to answer this#aa6#pollo boy
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i know you already have two other asks in your inbox , so dont worry about taking ur time answering this ! but i dont see a lot of people talking about how , when pouf died , there was a trail of blood to his body like he was dragging himself . he was most likely doing it because the king told him to continue looking for pitou , which just shows how dedicated he was to the king , even though the king was completely going against what he wanted him to be , , he mustve been completely broken after realising the king would be both dying and choosing to die with ( and metaphorically as ) a human but still dragged his body in dirt for him . it could maybe be partly because he genuinely worried about pitou too though
sorry that wasnt much of a question though ;( i just wanna know other people ' s thoughts since i dont hear this part discussed much
OKAY I HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS ON THIS
First though, the ask box doesn't have to just be for asks lmao! I welcome commentary of all kinds, things that spark discussion or even just little thoughts. I'm absolutely loving the community engagement I've been receiving here and I'm gonna encourage yall to give me whatever thoughts you wanna share via my inbox 💌
That being said, let me get the whiplash out of the way and say that I do have a lot of thoughts about Pouf's death, and yeah there's a lot to be said from a narrative perspective but it's the little details that absolutely kill me, like the blood trail you mentioned. I saw someone once bring that up as a sign of how quickly he was dying, that he probably tries to fly first and either couldn't get enough lift or actually fell when his wings started failing, then tried walking, then dragged himself until the very end. It really is a poignant sign of his loyalty and the longer you have to think about it, the more genuinely heartbreaking it gets, realizing that he probably knew he was never going to make it anywhere, that even if he was fully intending to look for Pitou or even try to get to the warehouse to be with Meruem, he wouldn't have enough time to be able to do it. And yet, he tried.
I have a few other facts on this that devastate me but I just realized while writing that that Meruem's memory comes back while he and Pouf (and Welfin) are standing in that crowd of people, and that's also where Pouf died. He was on the ground sobbing and now that I'm really thinking, there's a pretty good chance he may have tried to stand up, and then immediately collapsed, then tried to move forward and carry out the order he'd been given which. man I don't even know what to say, that's just a lot to take in..
The two specific things about his death that upset me most are that 1) he's the only guard to die offscreen, and 2) he's the only one that died alone. Pitou died onscreen in brutal detail (and the anime did in fact exaggerate some scenes; that wasn't one of them. Going back for the manga and realizing Pitou's death scene was practically 1:1 made me feel a little physically ill), and Youpi died in a flashback, but Pouf's death took place entirely offscreen. All we see is the pan over his body. As for the other point, Pitou died fighting and was grateful to have done so, Youpi very nearly did the same with Welfin before the poison overtook him, but Pouf wasn't granted that.
Pouf died alone in the crowd of humans he'd hypnotized, before they all awoke and died with him. Pouf, who hated humanity with a fiery burning passion, who likely tore himself to shreds in his final moments for how things didn't work out, who watched his king literally turn his back on him and walk away from him, died alone. We know what Pitou's last thoughts were, and similar can be said for Youpi (for the most part, anyways), but the same can't be said for Pouf. We get to hear his internal monologue so many times in the arc, and then in the one moment where it would be absolutely crucial, all we're left with is silence.
Truth be told, I didn't feel bad for him at all the first time I finished the CAA; I got very swept up in a lot of the other things happening and, while even then I knew Pouf was my favorite guard, maybe even my favorite character overall (at that point, needless to say now I definitely think he's one of the most characters ever), but seeing him dead didn't even make me sad. I mostly just sat there like wow,, you absolutely wild man, godspeed, what was ANY of that all about,, but the more I rewatched the arc, the more I really felt for him. I don't think I could go through the CAA again and not tear up a little at how solemn an end he gets.
I once saw someone else say that all the guards' deaths were direct contrasts to their entrances, and how with Pouf, it's how he came in so strong and flamboyant and loud, and then went out with a whimper. How everything he does gets more and more extreme and then fizzles out in a moment.
I'm running out of like. coherent responses to make about this, I'm just looking over all this like aughhghh he was loyal until the very end and his loyalty was complex!!! He did bad things because he was absolutely sure that they were the right thing to do!! And in the end, he did in fact have to face consequences!! They were immediate and direct in him seeing Meruem's evolution completely head on (which is something I talk about in another ask that's already been posted) and like. people say he's the worst guard or the least loyal when there's just so much more to him than that. So many people were glad he died which, I totally understand where they're coming from, but his death makes me so genuinely sad. All the guards' deaths do, but Pouf's especially feels so unfair. It's just another thing for the pile, with the pile being things about Pouf I wish other people would think about more 😔
#i just. think about him. i just think about him. truth be told i had those realizations while i was a little tipsy ksjxkx#i was fully expecting to be like heheho pretty pretty man but instead got hit with ''hey wait his death was so unfair actually-''#people dont have to love him but i just wish they would try to understand him 😔#most of the time i think about him im just like oughhghg heart eyes mf'er but sometimes i just (gross sobbing)#also realizing my answer took a slightly different angle than the question whoops; i stand by it anyways 👀#hxh#shaiapouf#asks#text#mod.txt
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CPTSD in characters
So in my last post, I said I identified a lot with Janine. And I do but there are large differences obviously and some of those differences are why I dislike her so much at this point at the end of season 9.
One of those similarities is CPTSD. The heartbreaking part is that by people encouraging her repeating these unhealthy and no longer necessary behaviours + not holding her accountable for her actions Janine which some of you hold so dearly DOES NOT GET BETTER. People do not care about Janine as a person, they care about her contributions. they don’t want to tell her things because it would make THEM uncomfortable.
And the thing with CPTSD, PTSD, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, etc, that people who are experiencing them don’t realize what their doing is wrong, or if they are more aware they physiological can’t control themselves but they know what they are doing is unhealthy. This where people like me with these conditions need to reach out for help because You are at the edge of where you are able to do this on your own. we all need healthy support at some point, part of growing up is know when, where, who and how to ask for it when the time comes. Which some support and acknowledgment Janine could be on the road to a new normal. Notice how I didn’t say normal, because there never was for Janine, her WHOLE life had been traumatic. She will NOT heal completely but she is making the choice to not heal partially which is hurting those around her and herself.
You have to not realize how toxic the situation is but then you realize who have to forge a whole new identity for yourself because you didn’t really have one that was heathy before. Your entire life was trauma and coping mechanism and responses to that trauma, no healthy growth of personality took place.
Everyones LOVES a strong female solider or what they think a strong female solider mindset looks like in a person …until they are responsible for fixing their brokenness after fact.
Relaxing is hard and meditation can be harmful when your traumatized because your just going to be exposed to your own traumatic experiences over and over again in your own head. There is no easy way to healing, nothing will change that. We do not experience life the way so many “normal” people do. But it’s well worth it because the alternatives are so much worse.
SO IF YOU DONT HAVE THIS ABOVE MENTIONED ILLNESS DONT COMMENT BECAUSE I SWEAR IM DONE WITH THE FAKE PEOPLE WHO DONT WANT TO DEAL WITH THEIR OWN ISSUES AT THE EXPENSE OF THE VULNERABLE.
#zombies run#runner five#runner 5#peter lynne#zr#simon lauchlan#zombies run!#janine deluca#sarah smith#evan deaubl#incorrect zombies run quotes#PTSD#cptsdhealing
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