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astonmartinii · 19 days

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i love him, it's ruining my life [guilty as sin part one] | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x fem sainz!reader

a contract ends, a relationship is exposed and even with everything on the line, she still loves him.

MASTERLIST | SERIES MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 621,099 others

yourusername: out and about town

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user1: girl? girl? GIRL?

user2: carlos' career is DEAD AND SHE'S POSTING VACATION PICS ON INSTAGRAM

user3: at least they're cute instagram pics

landonorris: y/n i think it's time you finally take that phone off of do not disturb

yourusername: but that's the perpetual state of my phone i am a poet i was born to be in the woods, if you have news tell me now before i close this app in 20 seconds

landonorris: i don't want to air your brother's business out in a public instagram comments literally just scroll through your timeline idiot

yourusername: wait let me open the family group chat

yourusername: WHAT

user4: are we about to see her reaction to carlos losing his seat in real time?

user5: let me grab my popcorn one sec

yourusername: WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME?

landonorris: take your phone off DND for once in your life and maybe you’d be clued in on the news

charles_leclerc: and while you’re at it reply to all the tiktoks i sent you

landonorris: not the time leclerc

charles_leclerc: but but but my tiktoks… i finally got a tarot card reading that resonates

landonorris: NOT THE TIME

charles_leclerc: don’t hate the player hate the game

carlossainz55: really?

charles_leclerc: i am TALKING ABOUT TIKTOKS LEAVE ME ALONE

yourusername: this is a lot - gosh can’t a girl go on holiday without everything imploding (i'll check the tiktoks in a second)

user6: anyone kinda weirded out that charles is just here joking with y/n as if his teammate and her brother hasn’t just been forced out of a job?

liked by carlossainz55

user7: babe he wasn’t forced out of a job, his contract wasn’t renewed. the last time i checked this was a sport where they compete not sit around and sit kumbaya

liked by charles_leclerc

user8: oh! they’re both liking shady comments already, it’s been a day since the announcement

user9: this is gonna get ugly isn’t it?

user10: awful, truly. i’m sat.

carlossainz55

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 1,029,458 others

carlossainz55: love all, trust a few and do wrong to none

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user11: .... right, what ever the fuck that means?

user12: i mean i was just here to celebrate the win what is all this poetry

user11: are we shading charles? lewis? ferrari?

yourusername: shakespeare, really?

carlossainz55: i can read you know

yourusername: oh really, that's news to me

user13: erm you guys i thought the whole job loss thing was meant to bring the family together....

user14: they joke like this all the time this is just sibling banter

user15: idk it's reading a lil more tense than usual, not that there's any reason for that (that we know of)

charles_leclerc: doing the tifosi proud ❤️

carlossainz55: will do while i can

user16: yall .... what happened to the chemistry

user17: they were never friends - pierre tried to tell yall

landonorris: a carlando podium !!! lets do this every week

carlossainz55: golf buddies and podium buddies - you love to see it

landonorris: LETS GO WILD AND PUT IT ON FERRARIS TAB THEY OWE YOU

landonorris: i mean let's celebrate your triumph good pal!

user18: the PR monster got lando :( rip

carlossainz55: just being able to win in front of the most important people in my life is enough

user19: does anyone else think it was weird that y/n wasn't at the race?

user20: like y/n loves australia she litr says that she was an aussie in a past life...

user21: also the most recent carlos comment... is y/n not one of the most important people in his life?

user22: do we think something has happened? like maybe he thought she should've cut her holiday short to come home to support him?

user23: also the fact that her and charles were immediately like joking around with each other? maybe it just rubbed him the wrong way

user24: but not even considering her an important person to him? and also that just seems like he's shifting all the blame to charles when it's ferrari who haven't extended the contract

maxverstappen1

liked by charles_leclerc, danielricciardo and 892,309 others

tagged: kellypiquet & yourusername

maxverstappen1: she says she's a professional third wheel, i call that being a LEECH

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user29: unlikely trio but somehow my favourite

user30: y/n really be their overgrown child

yourusername: how am i the leech when i paid for the ice cream mr millionaire 🤨

maxverstappen1: ever thought about how i want to spend quality time with my girlfriend?

yourusername: won't someone think of the children

maxverstappen1: ur 23

yourusername: that's it! p and i are unionising against this if you find suspiciously well drawn crayon graffiti on your walls it was NOT me

maxverstappen1: don't threaten my walls if you still want to come to races

yourusername: low blow 😩

user31: does that mean... she's not going to races with carlos?

user32: she's always been in his garage tho like even with how close her and max have always been SHE'S ALWAYS IN GARAGE 55

user33: i feel like this has something to do with the whole seat situation i'm not sure how but like i think there's something weird going on here

kellypiquet: don't worry @yourusername it might be max's house but it's p that has the final say

yourusername: no one gets bluey like i do

maxverstappen1: yeah but while you're here you get the best seat at the tea party IT'S NOT FAIR

yourusername: well one of us can name all the disney princesses and one of us can't

user34: so.... y/n is living with max? but i thought her and carlos shared an apartment in madrid?

user35: guys i'm so confused

user36: we need the twitter detectives on this asap

charles_leclerc: no lec... when i specifically sent you a PR bundle, you hate to see it

maxverstappen1: you only sent that to us for y/n

charles_leclerc: maybe! but i have it on good authority that you loved the vanilla

maxverstappen1: ummmmmmm no i'm a professional athlete, y/n ate all of it

yourusernames: FALSEHOODS

charles_leclerc: i know who i believe

maxverstappen1: why is everyone ganging up on me in this comment section

user37: charles sending lec to max's house just for y/n WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN

user38: and does it have anything to do with carlos maybe kicking her out

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1 and 673,892 others

yourusername: gotta make sure i give p a reason to tell me stick around

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user39: charles is always in the likes before me and i have notifications on

user40: they seem like such close friends it's so annoying that they're never spotted together at a race and we have no pictures of them :(

charles_leclerc: why do i never get any baked goods i literally sent my ice cream to my arch rivals house just for you

yourusername: you're never in the fucking country that's why

charles_leclerc: i have this kind of demanding job i don't know if you knew

yourusername: i also have the demanding job of being sexy and i cope just fine

charles_leclerc: i heard you got employee of the year, hard to be too upset when you're the competition

yourusername: better luck next time babe

user41: openly flirting with the guy that caused her brother to lose his job, this girl is just shameless

yourusername: do you think charles is the literal ceo of ferrari?

user42: why are you defending charles more than your actual brother?

yourusername: i feel like i gotta make this statement every three buisness days on here but like you people don't know what happens in our personal lives and i can defend my friends if i feel they're being unnecessarily questioned

user43: queen snapped omg

user38: they always be out here trying her like she's not a writer and poet SHE WILL READ YOU FOR FILTH

maxverstappen1: pretty sure she'd replace you with me in like two seconds so you're safe until [redacted] gets home

yourusername: i'm pretty sure with the right campaign i could sway jimmy and sassy to my side as well

user44: who the FUCK IS REDACTED

maxverstappen1: wouldn't you like to know 🤨

yourusername: max ???

maxverstappen1: what? i didn't have friends growing up i like that you tell me secrets

yourusername: oh :(

maxverstappen1: you wanna tell me more?

yourusername: NO YOU ALREADY KNOW THE BIGGEST ONE

maxverstappen1: true 💅🏻

user45: so like the secret is defo a relationship right?

user46: do we think carlos knows?

user47: by the fact that he's not in these comments... probably not

user48: so like he looses his seat and finds out his sister is in a secret relationship? someone give the guy a break

user49: or maybe, just maybe, there's a reason that y/n hasn't told carlos and he's not the guy we all think he is

liked by charles_leclerc

user50: OH? this war is so on ....

f1teaspill

liked by user51, user52 and 31,845 others

tagged: yourusername & charles_leclerc

f1teaspill: the war at ferrari is heating up... turns out there's a lot carlos didn't know and FOR YEARS. yes, you're reading that right, y/n sainz and charles leclerc have been in a relationship for at least two years and believe us we have a VERY credible source like WITHIN THE FAMILY level source.

the most important thing about this whole relationship is how carlos did not know for years, so how much more was hidden from him? did y/n know about the seat swap for lewis? was she leaking strategies to charles? was she sabotaging her own brother?

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user53: OH SHITTTTTTTTTT

user54: cancel me if you will but i think the hottest couple in f1 just dropped

user55: the fact we've been robbed of content of them for years .... i'm angry I NEED THE POETRY ABOUT CHARLES

user56: i'm gonna need y/n or charles to drop all the pics in response

user57: y'all a source "within the family"? did these fools find out about y/n's relationship and immediately run to an f1 TEA PAGE???

user58: that's some goofy ass shit

user59: i find it funny that instead of sitting down and thinking about why their daughter/sister didn't feel comfortable enough to tell you about her relationship they're like i know EXACTLY who needs to hear this

user60: the way it's proved her completely right to not tell them

user61: do you guys think this is like a tv show or like fan fiction? in what world is y/n sharing strategies to fuck over her own BROTHER?

user62: also be for fucking real... strategies? ferrari? at least try and be realistic

user63: also.... walk with me .... why would y/n and charles conspire to put lewis hamilton in carlos' seat? LEWIS FUCKING HAMILTON AND SEVEN TIME WORLD CHAMPION? WHY WOULD CHARLES WANT TO TAKE HIM ON OVER A GUY HE'S ALREADY BEATEN TWICE

user64: see this is the point! sainz camp you can try and demonise charles and yOUR OWN DAUGHTER all you want but we all know it's bull shit

user65: one thing about this that really rubs me the wrong way is that the sainz camp clearly expected that if y/n was in a relationship with charles that she would've been a double agent for carlos? and because she's not fucking insane they're now going for character assassination of their own SISTER/DAUGHTER

user66: THIS THIS THIS

user67: carlos won't even consider y/n an "important" person in his life but expect her to sacrifice or exploit her relationship for cheap psychological points

user68: also y/n isn't even at most races so how is she getting carlos' strategies to give to charles? this shit doesn't make any sense

user69: carlos himself has said in an interview that y/n is useless when it comes to racing that she's just a supportive figure rather than someone who has any in depth racing knowledge

user70: this is insane level hating with all the evidence out here... and against your own family...

user71: this just makes me think that y/n wasn't in australia for a reason - like was she banned from carlos' garage

user72: and the fact she's been staying at max's it just makes me think that y/n was kicked out of her and carlos' apartment

user73: now tHATS INSANE

espnf1

liked by pierregasly, maxverstappen1 and 1,025,788 others

tagged: carlossainz55, charles_leclerc & yourusername

espnf1: well... this could be awkward

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user77: espn babe you're just like me

user78: *slides $5 across the bar* get a camera in the ferrari garage?

espnf1: we're working on it 😩

user79: pierre and max here... they really are the paddock gossip girls

maxverstappen1: i guess carlos couldn't handle that i knew who redacted was before him 🤷🏻‍♂️

carlossainz55: really?

maxverstappen1: don't put your sister on the streets and i won't dunk these jokes on your head

user80: is this like the official f1 civil war?

carlossainz55: you don't know anything max, i'd really keep your nose out of our business

maxverstappen1: i actually know exactly how you guys move, you tried it on 17 year old me and it becomes my business when my best friend calls me with no where else to go (also i know you changed the locks while you were in maranello so she wouldn't be able to go to charles, you're not slick)

carlossainz55: i never took you as a lap dog max

yourusername: calling him the lap dog when you're the biggest bitch on the grid - bold

carlossainz55: you're burning a lot of bridges for a talentless slut who had to start fucking my teammate when we cut you off

yourusername: keep throwing your PR to the fire and see who fucking hires you, i guess we'll both be unemployed bums

user80: also imagine calling her talentless like she isn't a well established poet LOL

user81: guys this is getting so bad so quickly

user82: we got the whole rest of the season of this

user83: mad respect to max for sticking up for his bestie

user84: and her actual boyfriend isn't?

yourusername: charles will do his talking on the track like he always does. he won't debase himself with bickering in instagram comments, funnily enough ferrari don't like that - might be the reason he still has a seat and someone doesn't

carlossainz55: or he's a pussy who has his woman talk for him

yourusername: at least he has a woman to talk for him, he doesn't behind his dad at any sign of trouble. i've always known i didn't matter to dad the moment i wasn't a boy but i'm not afraid of him or you and i know exactly how you work. good luck

user85: do they know we can all read this?

user86: when i'm in an oversharing contest and the sainz siblings walk in

user87: those ferrari debriefs are gonna be AWKWARD

yourusername: especially since he doesn't have binotto to hide behind any more

user88: girl you good?

yourusername: i've never been better, this has been building for years even before charles and i got together

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 908,487 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: i love you, it's ruining my life

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user89: y/n i'm gonna let you finish but we could really get the best poetry out of all of this

user90: for real like yeah i'm sorry your brother tried to make you homeless, exposed your relationship, accused you of treason and called you a talentless slut - but think of the poetry!

charles_leclerc: i love you and i hope you're okay

yourusername: i'll always be okay with you

charles_leclerc: it's out now and no one can take us away from each other

charles_leclerc: i'd actually love to see them try

yourusername: i'd go through this fortnight of hell over and over again if it meant i'd still keep you

charles_leclerc: i'd like to say this is the end of it but i think we're in for the long run now

yourusername: i'm prepared to go to war for you

charles_leclerc: there's no one i'd rather be on the front lines with

user91: oh brother... YOU'RE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH A POET WE GET IT

charles_leclerc: * in love with

user91: oh my bad

charles_leclerc: no worries

user91: STILL GROSS BRO

liked by maxverstappen1

charles_leclerc: max ???

maxverstappen1: you guys need to calm down cause i'm not good with words and kelly is gonna start scrutinising my cards and i DO NOT HAVE THE VOCABULARY FOR IT

yourusername: lol

maxverstappen1: lol? LOL? did our brief yet forced stint as roommates mean nothing?

yourusername: fine i'll ghostwrite your valentines cards

user92: so this is all a bit melodramatic

user93: he CHANGED THE LOCKS BRO SHE HAS THE RIGHT TO BE MELODRAMATIC

liked by charles_leclerc

user94: okay so now we're in full blown f1 civil war - who is on each side?

user95: well max and pierre are on charles' side. i'd also add in lewis, seb, oscar, esteban, george, alex, yuki and daniel

user96: so carlos has lando and fernando?

fernandoalo_oficial: it might not be blood but that's my daughter

user96: ????

user97: did he just show up to diss carlos and then refuse to elaborate?

user98: sounds like a nando thing to do .... also just leaves carlos with lando lol

user99: this feels a bit unfair

yourusername: all is fair in love and poetry

fin.

note: so as soon as i had this idea (litr TTPD release day) i have been so busy and WHACKED with the worst writer's block but i hope this is a good start and rest assured knowing the beef will only get worse... I LOVE DRAMA

taglist: @aadu2173 @rhythmstars @kqliie @booksandflowrs @2bormaybenot @firelily-mimi @evie-119

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 instagram au #f1 x you #f1 #f1 social media au #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc #guilty as sin?

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on-my-vigilante-sht · 4 months

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Immortal Danger

Apollo x DaughterofDemeter!Reader

Summary: Apollo marries a half-blood without realizing how dangerous it can be.

Warning: PJO universe but no real PJO plot, (kind of) smut, threats, monsters, Ares slander

Word Count: 4.7K

Masterlist | Part 2

A/N Sam Claflin is my personal headcanon for Apollo and if he isn’t cast for the Titan’s Curse season I’m gonna cry

“Am I even allowed to be here?” I asked as Apollo and I materialized in his home on Mount Olympus.

“Probably not but Demeter’s already gonna be pissed when she finds out we eloped in Vegas,” Apollo smiles, pulling me down onto the couch. I laughed as he did so, taking a chance to look around. I was in awe. The ceiling to the sitting room was just a giant skylight and the sun seemed to perpetually shine through it. There were balconies in the column of the sun, revealing the upper levels of the extravagant manor decorated in gold.

“This place is incredible,” I said in awe.

“Yeah, Annabeth did a great job with the remodel. And it’s all yours,” he swore, his lips brushing against my cheek. “Everything that’s mine is also yours.”

“Really?” I challenged teasingly. “Then can I drive the sun chariot.”

He faltered. “Well… after Thalia, I don’t think-”

“I’m joking,” I assured him. “I don’t want to torch Antarctica. Or make North Africa freeze over.”

“I’ll give you lessons some day,” he promised. “Maybe when you’re a goddess and that human nervousness about dying instinct fades.” I laughed before he sprung up. “C’mon,” he said, pulling me up from the couch. “I wanna show you the bedroom.”

“Very subtle,” I chided him.

“I know,” he agreed with a cocky smile as he began climbing the stairs. “But you’re my wife now.” We went up so many levels I was beginning to get tired but Apollo was already practically dragging me up the stairs. When we went to a set of double doors I thought we were done with the stairs but there was one more flight. I followed him up, eyes widening as I realized his room made up the entire top floor.

There was a circle in the floor covered by glass with a view to the sitting room, allowing the sun to shine through the whole house. But the ceiling of the room itself was a glass dome, flooding the whole room with light. Surprisingly, it wasn’t ridiculously hot but that’s a perk of being the sun god. Several plants grew in various pots around the room—I had a sneaking suspicion he added them recently—and the walls were lined with various weapons, mostly bows and arrows. The bed itself was tucked into a sort of alcove, with pillows lining the edge of it, leaning up against the walls so as to make the whole alcove a soft bed. I noticed curtains hanging in front of the bed to shield it from the rest of the room, as well as a contraption above it against the glass probably to block the light from above.

Apollo came up next to me. “I know you’re a light sleeper so I had the curtains put in to block out the light.”

“This is incredible,” I said in awe. “But uh- do gods sleep?”

“We don’t have to but I love sleeping,” he smiled. “It’s one of the best things humans invented.”

I stepped closer to the bed, reaching down to feel the soft mattress. “Gods, do you know how long it’s been since I slept in a bed that wasn’t a twin size mattress?” I asked. Even though at 24 I was far older than any of the other campers at Camp Half-Blood, I had to stay there as the outside world had become too dangerous for me. Once I turned 22, Chiron finally let me have a room in The Big House because even the oldest campers besides for me were still around 17.

“Well,” Apollo began, getting closer until I was laying down on the mattress and his face was so close to mine I could see the gold flecks in his eyes, “I was thinking we’d consummate our marriage in this bed before sleeping,” he suggested, kissing me.

“I’d be open to that,” I laughed, kissing him back. Using godly strength, he managed to wrap an arm around my waist before pulling me up closer to the middle of the bed so our feet weren’t hanging off. As he kissed me, I could feel his hand find the zipper on the back of my wedding dress. But just as he started to bring it down, there was a bell and a shout.

“Apollo?” a masculine voice called through the house.

Our lips parted, and he rested his forehead on mine with a groan. “I hate him.”

“Who is it?” I asked.

“Hermes. Look, he can’t see you. He and I are cool now but he still can’t see you.”

“Okay,” I agreed. “I’ll just stay here.”

He nodded, pressing a kiss to my forehead before running downstairs to an incessant Hermes. As he went down the stairs I watched in amazement as his tux transformed into a t-shirt and shorts. Once he left I started looking around the room more, wary of the giant glass circle in the middle of the room. I went up to the weapons, finding various plaques describing what momentous kill each weapon was responsible for. A little bit self obsessed to have in your bedroom but, hey, that’s Apollo.

As the gods moved to the sitting room I could hear them through the glass. “I know you’ve been dating a demigod,” Hermes’ voice came. “Chiron just sent a distress signal about a missing half-blood.”

“So…?” Apollo’s voice came, trying to act nonchalant.

“I’m saying that the girl you’ve been dating is the missing half-blood. Chiron is worried sick because apparently she’s powerful but will attract a lot of monsters. And Ares is still pissed at you for putting an arrow through him during World War I. She could be in danger of him while not under Dionysus’ protection.”

“Well, I don’t know what to tell you, man. I haven’t seen her in a few weeks.”

“I haven’t known you to go even two days without seeing the person you’re dating.” I could hear the accusing tone in Hermes’s voice. And Apollo knew he was backed into a corner.

“Yeah well, dating a half-blood is hard. Chiron and Dionysus have her on lockdown. And do you know what Demeter would do to me? You remember how she lost it when Persephone ran off with Hades. How am I going to explain that I’m dating her half-human daughter?”

“Well you better pray Ares doesn’t find out about her or he’ll probably kill her just to piss you off.” Kill me?

“Look I’m going to have father turn her into a goddess soon anyway. She’ll be fine.”

“You’re awfully nonchalant about your little human going missing. Is it because she’s actually here?” Hermes accused.

“No!” Apollo said unconvincingly.

“Y/N!” Hermes called. “I know you’re here. Come on out.” I froze. What do I do? Obey the god or obey the other god?

“She’s not here and even if she was, she’d listen to what I said.” I didn’t move, contemplating whether or not I should hide.

“Fine, then you won’t mind if I check your bedroom.”

Σκατά. I could just hide in one of the many other rooms in the house. Hermes probably wouldn’t take the time to check every room. But once I reached the top of the stairs, the door at the bottom opened revealing a very pissed Hermes and distressed Apollo. Curse godly teleportation.

Hermes turned to Apollo. “Wanna do some explaining?” he asked sarcastically, observing my white dress. I just backed away, giving them space to come up the stairs. “Seriously, man. She could be killed because you married her and brought her here without permission,” Hermes explained as they walked up the stairs.

“But no one else is going to know because you’re not gonna tell them,” Apollo said, getting in between me and Hermes. “Right?”

He sighed. “Hi Y/N, congrats on getting married,” he finally greeted me.

“Thanks,” I answered hesitantly.

“Why is she even here?” he asked Apollo.

“Well, we were supposed to go talk to Zeus but I’m working the courage back up,” he laughed awkwardly. Hermes gave him an unamused look. “What? I’ve been single for millennia and then I’m just going to go up to father like ‘Hey, I finally decided to get married. By the way, it’s to a half-blood can you make her immortal too?’”

“So why is she still here?”

“Well Chiron has almost walked in on us having se- OW!” I cut him off with a pinch to his side. “What?” he asked, turning to me.

I could feel the heat rushing to my face now. “Shut up,” I chided him.

“Hermes of all people gets it!” he insisted, slinging an arm around my shoulders. “You can’t honestly say you’ve never brought a girl to Olympus. Like Penelope? Pan’s mother. Because Odysseus would’ve tried to murder you had he walked in on you two.”

“That’s different!” Hermes insisted.

“How?”

Hermes tried to think of an answer for a few minutes before he gave up. “Fine, whatever. But either get her back to camp or tell Zeus what’s going on before anyone else can get their hands on her.” He left no room for argument because he quite literally disappeared in a flash of light that second. Thankfully Apollo had the foresight to cover my eyes for me because Hermes had turned into a ball of light before I could react.

My husband sighed as he looked down at me. “I guess I should return you, huh? I’m sorry I just can’t face Zeus today.”

I smiled softly at him. Truthfully I was in no rush for immortality. I wasn’t quite ready to leave my life behind either way but when Apollo burst into my bedroom declaring that today was the day, I just went with it. Reaching a hand up to cup his jaw I leaned up to kiss him. “Whatever you want, you’re the one who has to take responsibility,” I reasoned.

“Thank you,” he murmured, capturing my lips. “Do you think you can be missing for just a couple more hours?” he asked, pulling away from me.

“Probably,” I agreed. He was immediately scooping my legs up before dropping me onto the bed.

My new husband spent the entire night drawing orgasms out of me until I finally got him to stop. That was the thing about gods, sometimes they didn’t know when to stop because they didn’t always understand human limitations.

I was still breathing heavily from my last peak when I fell asleep on Apollo’s chest, so exhausted.

Despite the fact that the sun was down, Apollo could still see his new wife clearly through the moonlight streaming through the glass ceiling. He had laid there for hours, admiring her relaxed features and reveling in the touch of her skin on his. It was nearly five o’ clock and he’d have to get up soon. As nice and sunny as summer was, he hated having to get up so early to get the sun chariot ready.

He gently stroked the hair away from her face, pressing the lightest kiss against her forehead so as not to disturb her. Sitting up, he rearranged the pillows and blankets to cover her before sliding off the bed. He threw on some clothes, leaving a t-shirt for his wife when she woke up before disappearing to the moors of England. Humans thought the sun was always going around the world in a circle but for the west, the sun began in England because that’s where the dividing line fell between the east and the west.

Setting up the sun chariot to do it’s course, Apollo set it off, watching it crest up in the sky like every day. Before he could turn to leave he sensed a new presence behind him. Turning, he found a very smug looking Ares. Trying to play it cool, Apollo smiled. “What are you doing here, brother?”

“I heard about a missing camper,” Ares began. “And then Aphrodite told me about a certain marriage certificate. Filed both on Earth and Mount Olympus.” Apollo cursed internally, that wasn’t supposed to be sent to Olympus for another week. The one time bureaucracy was efficient.

“Ares…” he began, intending to work out some sort of deal but the god of war interrupted him.

“I don’t know where you’re keeping her but until she’s immortal, she’s fair game to kill.”

“You really wanna piss off Demeter like that?” Apollo challenged, hoping her mother could provide her a little protection if he couldn’t.

Ares shrugged. “She has plenty of other children. And it’s not like I’m killing Persephone.” Demeter’s first daughter truly was the apple of her eye. She loved her demigod children but she’d get over their deaths. “Should’ve thought about this before you decided to put an arrow through me in 1918,” Ares sneered.

“That was like a hundred years ago!” Apollo insisted. “Don’t put her in the middle of this. She didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Should’ve thought about the consequences of your actions before you fell in love with a demigod,” the god of war taunted before disappearing in a flash of light.

The sun god let out an enraged grunt before transporting to his house. He practically ripped open the curtains surround the bed to make sure his bride was still there. He let out the biggest sigh of relief seeing her still laying there, unharmed. But now she was stirring due to the sudden light flooding her eyes.

I groaned as the sun hit my eyes and a body came to lay next to me. “I’m sorry,” Apollo said, crawling into his spot next to me. “I really wish you could go back to sleep but you need to be back at camp now,” he said. I could now hear the urgency in his voice as I opened my eyes.

“Why? What happened?” I asked, sitting up.

“Look, I uh- may not have thought this marriage all the way through,” he said nervously, handing me a shirt.

My heart dropped and pain flooded my body. “What?” I asked. I cursed myself, I knew it was too good to be true. I thought that after seeing each other for five years he was being honest about wanting to marry me. But I guess five years to an immortal god is the equivalent to a week for a human.

Apollo turned, finding my hurt expression. “No!” he immediately tried to clear up. “No it’s the fact that you’re in danger now. I don’t regret you. I’m so happy you’re my wife now and that you will be forever. I just didn’t think about the other gods’ reactions.”

“Oh,” I said quietly, relief washing over me.

“I could never regret you,” he said, coming over to sit beside me. “I love you. So much,” he swore, pressing me into his chest.

“Is this about Ares?” I asked. He suddenly froze. “I overheard you and Hermes downstairs,” I explained.

“Yes, but I swear to you nothing’s gonna happen to you. You just have to stay at camp. Ares won’t harm you if you’re in Dionysus’ territory,” he said urgently. If his grave tone was any indication, I was in serious danger. “I’m gonna talk to Zeus. We’re already married and I consulted the Fates when I met you so he’ll probably approve your immortality,” he rushed out, handing me shorts to throw on.

I was at a complete loss of what to say so I said the only thing I could think of. “Okay, I trust you.”

He smiled, lightly grasping either side of my jaw. “We have to go. I’m gonna transport with you just outside of camp. The other campers won’t be able to see me but you’re gonna say you snuck out to visit your dad because you were… I don’t know… having a hard time being the only adult at camp?” he suggested.

I nodded, grasping his hand. Immediately we were standing on the side of a familiar rural road. I looked up at the hill in front of me, just over it was Camp Half-Blood. Turning, I found nothing next to me but Apollo’s hand still intertwined in mine was proof he was still there.

He untangled his fingers from mine and gave me a gentle push on my back to encourage me to walk. I did so hesitantly, slowly walking up the hill. As I spotted the gates of camp. Stood on either side of the arch, were two campers in full battle armor. I could hear an indistinct yell as I approached. Probably alerting Chiron to my reemerged presence.

When I finally reached the “safety” of camp I could sense that Apollo was gone. He had kept a few paces behind me but disappeared once I got past Thalia’s former tree. Meanwhile, there was a new threat currently facing me as both Chiron and Mr. D stared down at me disapprovingly. They so rarely agreed with each other and Mr. D so rarely even bothered to pay attention to us that I knew I was in deep shit. “Y/N,” Chiron said like he was scolding his 16 year old daughter, “come with me.” He turned, trotting away as I followed after him like this was a walk of shame. Dionysus just disappeared.

Once I finally reached the Big House, I spotted Mr. D and a woman in the room. She radiated warmth and life despite the rage coming off of her. “Mother?” I asked.

“How could you!” she immediately yelled. “You were seeing a god behind everyone’s back? Not just any god, Apollo,” she spat angrily. “And then next I hear you’re married to him?” she asked in disbelief. “Y/N, do you know what you’ve gotten yourself into? I’ve already lost one daughter to a god. I won’t lose another one.”

Had I not been speaking to a goddess I would’ve lashed out at her. It’s not like she was ever really there for me. How can you lose someone you’ve never been there for? “You’re not gonna lose me,” I insisted, biting my tongue. “You haven’t lost Persephone either, she’s only in the Underworld for a few months. I will be on Olympus with you.”

“Locked in Apollo’s morally depraved sex mansion,” she spat, clearly upset. My jaw nearly dropped, I was so shocked she actually said that.

“Demeter, as valid as your worries are,” Dionysus reluctantly said, “there is the more pressing matter of Ares trying to murder your daughter. And he’ll keep trying until Zeus grants her immortality.”

“Are those boys still fighting about the arrow in 1918?” Demeter demanded.

“Wait, Ares wants to kill me because Apollo shot him?” I asked.

“Yes, it was an accident but Ares never forgot. Especially because it allowed the Allied powers to win. At the time, Ares was kind of betting on Germany to be the next big thing but then when the Allies all blamed it on Germany, Ares wasn’t happy.” Chiron clarified. “And he wants to destroy Apollo’s happiness in revenge.”

“I don’t want you seeing him,” my mother suddenly demanded, still hyper-focused on the wrong topic. Even Chiron and Mr. D rolled their eyes at that. “He’s a no good playboy.”

“We’re already married. I’m not gonna just stop seeing him. And I knew what I was getting myself into. I made sure he actually wanted a relationship with me before I got attached.”

“Oh please-”

“He married me, didn’t he?” I interrupted.

“Demeter, if it’s any consolation he does seem to genuinely be in love with her,” Chiron defended me. “Apollo has never married in all the millenniums he’s lived. He has finally settled down.”

She looked reluctant to accept his argument but didn’t say anything else.

“S-so what do I do now that Ares wants to kill me?” I asked. “Apollo said that he wouldn’t touch me under your protection,” I looked at Mr. D.

The god of wine still looked reluctant to participate in all this. “Well technically camp belongs to all the gods and I cannot ensure your safety. Besides, Ares has never minded breaking a few rules of war. I’ll have to bring you to a more secure place whilst Apollo tries to convince Zeus.”

Demeter sighed. “I will go help him too but after you are immortalized we are discussing your living arrangement,” she said with a stern finger. Before I could reluctantly agree she was gone.

“Come,” Chiron said with a hand on my back. “You must pack only your essentials. Then Dionysus will take you to the convent you’ll be staying at.”

“Convent?” I asked, stopping in my tracks.

“Well, I am the god of cults,” Mr. D reasoned from behind me. “I have a few of my followers there but enough real nuns to disguise you. You’ll be safe there.”

I was only at the convent for two days before I was in danger again.

I had been getting along fairly well with the other nuns. Except for one. Her name was Peggy and she seemed too friendly and was always trying to be alone with me. With this being a place that housed Dionysus’ followers I thought nothing of it until I found myself alone with her.

I had been doing my daily chores of dusting the entire convent when Peggy entered the room I was in. I thought nothing of it until I heard the lock click into place. When I turned I didn’t find the nun, I found a gorgon with a grotesque smile on her face. “Daughter of Demeter, I hadn’t expected to see you here. I heard about your little predicament.” I glanced to the open window across the room. If I could just get outside I could trap the gorgon in nature. “Poor Apollo will be so heartbroken when he realizes his bride is dead before he was even able to give her immortality.”

Grabbing a lamp, I hurled it at the monster while she was still talking. It bounced harmlessly off her, shattering but I was already throwing myself through the window. Jumping through a second story window face first probably wasn’t the best idea but I needed to get her onto the ground. As I hit the ground I felt my wrist crack but I didn’t even have time to consider it because the gorgon was bursting through the window after me. She barely missed jumping on top of me but I rolled out of her path. As she was still regaining her bearings I willed the roots of the earth to wrap around her.

Thousands of roots sprung up from the ground tangling each other and the gorgon until they secured her. Any monster worth their myth could cut through my vines but they would come so fast that the monster couldn’t keep up until they were immobilized by the earth. Once the gorgon stopped moving and had just become an unrecognizable mass of weeds, I willed them to pull her into the ground. I’m sure it was a horrific way to die, having every nutrient in your body sucked out of you from underground until you could only become a pile of ichor that would remain in the earth forever.

As soon as I sensed that her life force was gone, I allowed some vines to wrap around my wrist, using the resources of the earth to heal my broken bones. As I let out a sigh of relief at the pain subsiding, I saw a faint flash of light. Now standing a hundred feet away from me were twin brothers, each standing around six feet tall, in full Greek battle armor. I knew enough about mythology and the context of my situation to know that these were Phobos and Deimos. If they weren’t standing between me and the convent I’d try to run there for safety.

“I’m so glad that gorgon was here,” Phobos said. “If it weren’t for you using your powers we never would have found you.”

Σκατά. Well, I just took down a gorgon, I could imprison these two. I let the earth crawl up their shins but they both just looked at each other with smiles before bursting into flames. Their explosion was so violent it threw me back a few feet.

I let out a groan as pain exploded in my body. Peeling open my eyes, I found the earth underneath their feet scorched and they were laughing. I tried to grow vines around myself to pull me into the earth as protection but a blade was suddenly cutting through them and I was being pulled up by my guimpe. Curse these stupid nun outfits.

“Wait, wait, please,” I begged.

“Too bad for you we don’t get to kill you,” Deimos taunted in my face, still holding me by the guimpe. “Ares is gonna torture you to death and send the footage to your husband.”

I did the only thing I could think of. I spat in his face.

“Ew!” he yelled, dropping me to the ground. I wasted no time tearing off into the woods, barely paying attention to Phobos berating his twin.

I continued on, tearing through the woods to get far enough. Seeing a flash of light, I turned the other way, trying to escape Phobos and Deimos long enough so I could hide. “Y/N!” I heard a familiar yell but I didn’t bother to stop. For all I knew, that was one of the twins playing tricks on me.

As I tried to jump over a branch my skirt got caught, sending me to the ground with a crash. Again, curse these nun outfits. Before I could get up though, there was a weight on me. I immediately began screaming and thrashing, assuming it was either Phobos or Deimos but two hands on my face made me look straight ahead. I calmed down realizing it was Apollo currently sitting on top of me.

“Hey, hey, you’re safe,” he assured me. “It’s just me.” As I started calming down, he pulled the veil off my head. “There we go,” he soothed, pulling me up from the ground. As he was still trying to calm me down, Phobos and Deimos appeared behind him. He whirled around, pushing my body behind his. “Zeus granted her immortality. She is under his protection!”

“What we don’t know can’t be held against us,” Phobos laughed.

But before he could do anything, I found myself in a new place. Olympus, I recognized it. Staring up in awe at all the thrones and the magnificent room made of marble. Eleven gods sat around me, including Ares. A completely golden throne that seemed to shimmer was empty.

I looked around, ensuring my head was bowed to all the gods—especially Ares—I finally reached Zeus, falling to my knee.

“Y/N L/N,” Zeus’ booming voice seemed to echo across the room. “You have been granted immortality by the virtue of your husband, Apollo. With the approval of myself and the fates. I hereby grant you goddess status: Y/N, goddess of healing, daughter of Demeter, and wife of Apollo.”

I don’t know what I was expecting but it was as if an unknown burden I didn’t know I had was lifted.

I stood, unsure what to do but all of a sudden a force was hitting me. As Apollo wrapped his arms around me I knew he had been what knocked into me. “My wife’s a goddess!” he yelled, still hugging me, much to the amusement of the other Olympians.

A/N I'm gonna be so fucking fr I had no plot going into this I just wanted to write about Apollo so if anyone has any suggestions or requests of a part 2 that ends this better I'm happy to write them

Masterlist | Part 2

#apollo #apollo x reader #percy jackson and the olympians x reader #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo #pjo x reader #pjo series #pjo tv show #greek gods #greek god x reader #myths #mythology #greek mythology #greek mythology x reader #sun #sun god #sun god x reader #x reader

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aliteral-ghost · 5 months

Text

This is the gift I made for @calilk for the @mcytblrholidayexchange! I hope you enjoy it!

I was asked for some identity reveal shenanigans and I hope I was able to convey it well! It's Joe and Cleo-centric with a little hurt and a lot more comfort! You can read the whole thing here or on ao3 here.

Beta'd by the amazing @iwillstealyourjawbone!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cleo knows Joe for a whole decade before they even begin to think about whether or not he’s actually human. No one on the Hermitcraft server really is, as far as she knows, but Joe is mostly unassuming and Cleo hasn’t known a human in so many years that she just figures that they all have their quirks. Until one day, when they’re prepping for HHH, and Cleo realizes a trait that Joe Hills has that no one in her many years of existence has had.

“Joe?” Cleo asks. “Why can't I see your eyes?” Joe blinks, or at least they assume he blinks, from behind the glasses that are perpetually covering his eyes.

“Well, sorry, I didn't realize it was a problem! I can fix that right away.” Eyes appear as a sort of halo around his head, all staring at Cleo. She flinches suddenly at the amount of them watching her.

“No, no, that's fine, Joe. I really don't need to make eye contact…” The eyes disappear as quickly as they arrive, flickering out with a snap of static and sudden rush of air pressure. Cleo's ears pop, or at least they try to, one of the eardrums slightly too rotten to be able to flex that much. They manage to get it to go back to normal with a little fiddling, then smile at Joe again. “Well, shall we? There are hermits to be helped.”

Or harmed, or hindered, or hugged, or any other verb that starts with ‘h’ that Cleo can think of. It varies wildly through the weeks depending on who needs help, but Joe always knows what they're going to be doing. Even when there isn't really going to be a plan, Joe always knows.

Cleo doesn't really care, though. That's just Joe Hills, in his infinite quirks. They're friends for a reason, of course.

After the helping (holding Tango at swordpoint until he lets them place snow), Joe and Cleo find themselves sitting at the top of Cleo’s castle, watching the sun go down. Predictably, the rest of the hermits were about as flaky as pumpkin pie crust, and it was a monumental task for just the two of them. Tango was grateful at the end of it all, of course, which always feels good, but Cleo’s fingers are practically falling off from the cold, wet snow, and Joe seems like he’s on the verge of falling asleep.

Neither of them are talking, Cleo making mental notes of all of the things she still has to finish in her base, all the armor stands she wants to fill the rooms with, and Joe staring into the sun. Or, at least, Cleo thinks he is. She can’t see his eyes. His glasses always seem to be reflecting just right.

It’s not like that’s the strangest thing about Joe, either. Occasionally they will find him just slightly too transparent, or working on something while floating at a strange angle, but that’s always been chalked up to the Joe Hills difference. She’s never thought that it might be because Joe isn’t human.

“I’ve been thinking about your question,” Joe says eventually. It takes Cleo by surprise, not because he’s been thinking about a question she posed, but because he sounds melancholy about that thinking.

“Which one?” Cleo asks. In theory, they know. They both know what question he’s been thinking about, but neither of them really know how to go about saying it.

“About my eyes,” Joe hiccups, a little sort of half-laugh, half-sob, clearly exhausted. “Do you know what I am, Cleo?”

That gives Cleo pause. Sure, she has theories, but the rule of thumb on the Hermitcraft server is always to keep theories to yourself. Never assume. “You're human?” She doesn't mean it to sound like a question.

“I'm a monster,” Joe sighs, nearly deflating. “My kind has done so much harm to the players… I've done so much….”

“If you're a monster,” Cleo says, not sure what they're talking about but just wanting to make things better, “What does that make me? My kind is constantly trying to kill us.”

As if on cue, a zombie groans from somewhere outside, and shuffles closer, as if sensing them through the walls.

“That's different,” Joe says. “You're cognizant. You're you. If you saw my true form… I wouldn't be allowed around here anymore.”

“I may not know ‘your true form,’ or whatever,” Cleo retorts, a little indignant, “But I know you. You're Joe Hills, from Nashville, Tennessee, you like helping people in that strange way you do, and you would never want to hurt any of us.”

Joe curls up like they’ve done hundreds of times before, head on Cleo’s thigh, shoulder pressed firmly to their side. It’s habit, at this point, more than anything, and he eases into a fitful sleep before long. Cleo doesn’t follow suit, counting his breaths and trying to ignore how Joe’s form shifts and morphs in his sleep. It wouldn't be polite to stare.

She doesn’t look up, but if they did they would see a massive halo of eyes, shimmering in every color of the rainbow. They’re not watching Joe and Cleo, instead staring off into the distance, watching every move of the other beings on the server, protecting them.

The next time someone asks about Joe–Gem catches Cleo after one of their Secret Life sessions, eyes wide with curiosity–they just smile. “That’s just how Joe is,” Cleo says. “That’s how he’s always been. Not much more about it.”

“But–” Gem starts, still full of questions.

“It’s the Joe Hills difference,” Cleo insists. “It’s really better if you don’t think too hard about it, anyways. You'll just end up with a headache.” She doesn’t say any more than that, even when Gem keeps pestering her. It’s not their business to share, and if Joe ever feels like telling the other Hermits, he will. They won’t pressure him, they know that, everyone is far too polite to even think about it.

“Okay,” Gem says, sounding like she’s mulling it over. “The Joe Hills difference.” She doesn’t ask any more questions, and Cleo goes about her day, happy that she'd been trusted to protect their friend’s privacy.

#hermitcraft #joe hills #zombiecleo #really fun to do this I don't normally write joe hills as eldritch

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harringtown · 2 years

Text

never even noticed rooms were made bright by you

welcome back to another episode of brooke is physically incapable of writing short things. no drabbles, we one shot like men. this is my first Eddie fic so naturally it took way too long to finish but! we made it!

requested by anonymous

pairing: eddie munson x reader

word count: 1.6k

summary: Eddie likes the reader, the reader likes Eddie, and it just takes a near death experience or two to figure it out (aka friends to lovers w a dash of angst)

Robin disappears in the black water, leaving nothing but a small splash to prove she was even there. Robin’s splash. Nancy’s coat. Steve’s sneakers. The only proof that they were here, that they existed before they dove for the gate.

It’s like that saying. If a tree falls, and no one is around to hear, does it make any sound? Here, if everyone goes through a gate and no one comes back up…

But Eddie is still here, standing at the edge of the boat staring into the water like he expects a monster to leap out of it. Which wouldn’t be all that inaccurate an expectation.

It would be easy to stay in the safety of the dingy. It would be cowardly, too. Steve, Robin, and Nancy need you. Eddie and the dingy don’t.

Damn it. With a sigh, you push to your feet. Eddie curses, dropping to his knees as the boat wobbles.

“Jesus, dude—” Eddie stops at the sight of you peeling off your coat. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Is this how you usually react when girls take off their clothes in front of you, Munson?” You ask, tossing the jacket aside. Eddie’s lips part, what is inevitably a witty comeback dying on his tongue as you reach for the hem of your tee. “And here I thought you had game.”

“If I had any semblance of game, sweetheart, you’d already know the answer to that question.” He stands, hands outstretched to keep his balance, and inches over to you. “You’re not going down there.” It’s both question and command. Any other time, you’d go with the latter interpretation and pull an easy argument out of him, solely for entertainment’s sake, but with every second that passes, Nancy and Robin get closer to the gate, and Steve is less likely to still be alive.

“I am,” you say. “And you’re waiting here.”

His hands are still on your arms. You both seem to realize it at the same time, and he steps back, arms up in surrender.

“Look, you’re not gettin’ any argument from me on that last part, but if you actually think—”

“Stay in the boat, Eddie.” You lift a foot, but before you can step out, Eddie tugs you back. The tiny boat, combined with the sloshing waves and your combined lack of balance, nearly sends you both into the water. Eddie steadies you before you go tumbling and twists you to face him.

“Yeah, I don’t know what exactly is waiting down there, but I do know there’s not a goddamn chance I’m letting you go alone.” He drops his hands to his sides again and digs them into his pockets. Eddie is a perpetual creature of motion, but every time he so much as shrugs a shoulder, the boat tips.

“Good thing it’s not up to you. And I won’t be alone.”

“You can’t—”

“Listen to me, Munson,” you say, and you’re not sure if it’s the cold or the dark or the impending death or if you’re simply out of fucks to give, but you don’t stop the truth from leaving your lips. “Three of the people I care about most in the world are already literally in hell. And I’ll be damned if I let the fourth follow me in, too.”

He doesn’t seem to register the confession, rolling ahead like a steam engine in his protests.

“What, so, I’m supposed to sit here in the boat and babysit the flashlights? Wait for you and the others to save the day?”

“Yes!”

He scoffs. “No!”

“Yes!”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because I said so—”

He snorts, but you continue before he has time to interrupt.

“—and because I love you, and I can’t let you die!”

Eddie rears back like you’ve struck him. Knowing it’s the only hesitation he’s likely to have, you force a grim smile on your face.

The dark was chilling before, but now, you’re grateful it hides the blush covering every inch of your skin. Somehow, the awaiting portal to a hell dimension is now more appealing than the dingy.

You swallow the stone in your throat and meet his gaze.

“Just… stay in the boat, Eddie,” you say, and dive into the lake.

Eddie does not, in fact, stay in the boat, but the onslaught of bat-like demons quickly distracts from your chiding. There’s barely a moment to make a mental note to lay into him later before Robin shoves a thick slab of wood into your hands. It isn’t until you reach Skull Rock that the adrenaline finally eases and your thoughts are coherent again.

Nancy drags a bloody and haggard Steve aside to bandage his wounds, and Robin makes a point of not looking at anyone. Her passing joke from hours ago about a fifth wheel suddenly makes sense, a realization that isn’t made better when Eddie sidles up to your side.

He bumps your shoulder lightly. You allow yourself only a glance in his direction, but a glance is more than enough. He’s covered in debris and blood that may or may not be his own, and his hair is a wild, tangled mess, and behind that impressively strong facade of his, he’s scared. Absolutely terrified.

Three years spent trying to keep Eddie Munson out of this mess, and here he is anyway.

“Hey,” he says, voice low. “You alright?”

You fold your arms over your chest and let out a humorless laugh. “Really?”

“Fair enough.” He jams his hands into his pockets and rocks back on his heels. “Shitty question. This is my first time in a hell dimension, so I’m not exactly up to date on conversation protocol.”

A smile creeps over your lips, and you shake your head, catching his gaze.

“I’m okay. Or, I’m okay as I can be, down here. You?”

“Me? Oh, I’m downright peachy.” Eddie drops his eyes to his shirt, nose crinkling. He peels off a clump of goo and flicks it aside. “Considering.”

You laugh, but it dies quickly, and silence hangs heavy in the air after it.

Eddie clears his throat. Squirms. Shifts. He wants to say something, and if you were braver, you might force it out of him. But you’re running low on bravery, and you’ll need whatever’s left just to get back home.

“So.” In your periphery, his face is twisted up. “Are we just not talking about it?”

Your heart skips a beat. “Talk about what?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe how you professed your undying love for me and immediately leaped through into a cursed lake a hole in the universe?”

Damn it. Damn him and his unending honesty.

“I did not say undying.” You kind of wish the bats would make a reappearance, if only to kill this conversation. “And seeing as we’re probably going to die down here, getting rejected really isn’t on my list of priorities.”

Eddie’s head snaps your way.

“Don’t go playing martyr, on me. We’re not dying down here,” he says, a ferocity in his voice you’ve only heard a few times. “And who said anything about getting rejected?”

“Let’s not, Munson. Seriously.” You turn, about to make a beeline for Robin, but Eddie practically jumps in front of you, blocking any exit.

“Oh, no, let’s.”

You try to go left, and he throws out an arm, making a tsk tsk sound. Another attempt, another block, and you finally give up, letting out a sigh. You sweep out a hand as if to say go on, then.

“You seriously don’t know?” Eddie asks, stepping back and shaking his head. He spreads out his arms and says, “Like I haven’t been screaming it from the rooftops since we were fifteen?” He inclines his head and drops his arms, waving a hand. “Or singing it on the stage, at the very least.”

Robin isn’t trying to hide her eavesdropping anymore, and even Steve and Nancy cast glances your way. It strikes you again that this is the last place to talk about this, but it’s not as if Eddie’s leaving room for any other choice.

“Don’t know what?”

“That I’m in love with you,” he says, the bravado dropping in the back half of the sentence. “I haven’t, like, tried to hide it, or anything. I really thought you knew.”

The adrenaline from a few minutes ago returns, but it’s a different kind, and brings with it a fresh fear. Scarier, almost. You realize your mouth is hanging open, and clamp it shut.

“I... I didn’t—” You stammer.

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure you’re the last person in Hawkins to figure it out,” Eddie says.

“He’s not wrong,” Robin calls.

“My point exactly.” Eddie gives a close-lipped smile and gestures at her. “Thank you, Buckley.”

“Anytime,” Robin says with a mock-salute and an apologetic smile.

Eddie meets your eyes again, and there is something sheepish about his expression, his tilted grin. It’s an odd combination with the gore and the circumstances, but it’s oddly endearing. Endearing that you may well and truly die down here, but Eddie is still himself.

“So, while I definitely disagree with your whole ‘we’re gonna die’ thing, I figure, on the off chance that you are right, I should probably—” He shrugs and folds his arms. “—you know. Stop being such a chicken. Stop screaming from rooftops and just say it to your face.” He presses his lips together. Inhales. “And obviously, it isn’t great timing, but that one’s on you—”

“Eddie,” you say, taking a step toward him, and then another, until only a foot of dust-speckled air is left between you.

“Yeah?”

“Stop talking.”

His brows knit together, and he opens his mouth for some kind of retort, but you don’t give him the chance. Before he can say anything, before he can do anything, you take his face in your hands and press your lips to his.

If you survive this, there will be time for talking. For right now, this is enough. Eddie, hands on your hips, hair tickling your cheek. Steve’s whistle, Nancy and Robin’s chiding laughter. And Eddie, laughing into the kiss. It is enough.

#brooke writes fic #eddie munson #Eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #stranger things #stranger things fanfiction #Steve harrington #nancy wheeler #robin buckley

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angelofthepage · 7 months

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If I had a nickel for every time a FNAF video got me thinking critically about Bendy, I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice. Today it's about how there's a lot we don't actually know in this series, and how maybe I need to stop driving myself crazy trying to figure it out.

So, this is where I reveal that I am anal about what I consider to actually be canon to Bendy, and that framing matters to me a lot. Like, if we're talking about The Illusion of Living for example, I will be very explicit in saying the canon is that Joey claims that Bendy was created by him, Henry, and Abby while sitting on the floor of his apartment. And that is the only thing that's canon, Joey claims this event happened in this way, but whether or not it actually happened in this way is unclear, since Joey perpetually lies to people throughout this series. Now, this is one of those events that I think he's telling the truth about personally, but no, all we have for the canon of that event is that Joey tells us it happened that way. That's not the same thing as "this is decidedly what happened". And this goes for every character, these characters are not guaranteed to be telling a truthful or accurate version of events at any time, some of them have reasons to either purposely abstract the truth, or unreliable memories due to the horrors of this world affecting their minds. I feel this VERY strongly with the books especially, because we know most of them have a lot of mental stuff going on because of the ink, but it's not just them. Look at Sammy and Susie, look at Tom, look at Wally and how charming but suspicious he is in what he knows. This series has VERY FEW reliable narrators, there is so much you have to interpret in order to get anywhere with it. So when people tell me something is "canon," I am immediately skeptical and want to know what their source is. Can't take anything at face value.

And the thing is, when you look at the canon through this lens, it is exhausting, technicalities will become the bane of your existence. This week I went back to some of the books with some friends, and the descriptions for Brant and Archie in TLO and FTB don't entirely line up with them being lost ones specifically as ink monsters (thank you Victor @reanimationstation for pointing that out and for the Sammy take that will follow here, I was so caught up in the moment I missed it on my first read-through). I feel like that's the intent with them, at the very least I feel like that's the intent with Brant because his book is literally titled "The Lost Ones", but the skeletal structure, the glowing eyes, things I would consider to be KEY FEATURES of that kind of monster are missing from their descriptions, and it leaves me with a lot of questions about what they actually are and what creatures they DO line up with. And I'm fascinated by the possibilities, because it creates a lot of fun options for fan interpretations, like making Archie a similar creature to Sammy to further unite their common threads (like why is Sammy the only character built the way he is??), or developing a new creature altogether. It is also frustrating from a theorizing standpoint because I can't say either of them are lost ones definitively, that's not the canon. They are ink monsters with x features, that is all we know, anything else is putting a label on them without knowing all the ingredients that make them up. I think Brant is probably a lost one, but I can't say that's the canon, that's something I've inferred and interpreted from the information available, which isn't a complete picture.

I want to do more with theorizing, but I think, I just wanna let myself have fun for a bit too, and not care about the canon by my usual high standards. I wanna go be a little indulgent with letting the hallucinations from Fade to Black exist as real creatures, even though there isn't enough evidence to say whether they are or not. I wanna play with the glasses more. I want to overthink about how Wilson may have used the glasses to enter and exit the studio as a possible "in" for Dark Revival. (Frankly Fade to Black has me asking a LOT of questions about Wilson that I want to mess around with.) I want to think about how Memory Joey, and how he might believe Henry and Allison are clones wholeheartedly, but he might have been fed bad information that he believes to be true (I don't think he'd intentionally lie to Audrey, but he is liable to be misinformed, he's a Joey after all). I want to contemplate "what ifs" that don't have to be based on completely factual things. I want hypotheticals. Maybe I just want to write fanfiction! X'''D Isn't that all theorizing is, fanfiction you're trying to validate with the canon? Like hell if I know!

There is a time and place for being anal about the canon I think. Establishing a timeline or a baseline of our factual information is useful and can inform a great deal of things, and it also gives you some room to anticipate where changes might occur if something gets revealed as a new twist or retconned in the future. Maybe that's just me, trying to justify things and make them fit within my view of this world (which let's be real, we all do it, I'm just hard on myself for it). But sometimes, you gotta let go. Sometimes you gotta let yourself be a little silly, maybe a bit unhinged. Sometimes you have to say, fuck it, maybe the hallucination of Henry from FTB becomes Borkis and writes golden ink messages for Cyclebreaker Henry to find. It's out there, it's stupid, but damn is it fun to consider based on nothing at all. Sometimes you get to ask if Keepers have souls for shits and giggles.

Maybe I need to stop framing theorizing as "solving the canon". Maybe we all could stand to have more fun playing with the world. And maybe we could stop calling things "canon" and debating the "canon" and just, enjoy the ride regardless of the canon. Because ultimately, it is frustrating to argue about the canon, especially for a series like Bendy where half the fun is from getting interpretative with it. Part of the fun is creating the story, using your imagination with the pieces the story gives us. And we're not always gonna agree on what kind of story this is or what's valuable about it, nor what direction it should go in or what is the best way to tell it. That's a huge part of enjoying stories, you're not supposed to all get the same takeaway from it. Bendy's story means different things to different people. And that's part of the beauty of it. And maybe, I need to be a little nicer to myself about it. Maybe I need to go learn to play again.

Maybe I need to learn not to take things so seriously. ^^''''

#bendy theorizing #bendy commentary #batdr #bendy fade to black spoilers #bendy ftb spoilers #bendy fade to black #bendy ftb #bendy and the dark revival #long post #been thinking a lot about this this week

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spinningbuster98 · 4 months

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As bad as it may sound, it really seems to me that N!Isaac and N!Annette have both been written as Perfect Minorities™.

OG Isaac was the perpetual second one. Not incompetent by any means, but you know the deal, he was salty as hell that Hector was just a tiny bit better :P In the show, the dynamic is flipped: it's Isaac who is Dracula's special babyboy. But he is the special babyboy to such an exaggerated degree that he makes Hector's inclusion not only completely useless, but even detrimental: why would Dracula bother to hire an average Devil Forgemaster, without a shred of physical prowess, who he considers to be "a child in a man's body", and who he had to resort to lie to (Hector literally shouts in the war room that he doesn't enjoy the needless suffering Dracula is causing)... when Isaac by all means is strong, smart (allegedly), much more efficient in Forging, and 100% on board with Dracula's extermination plans to the point of being the only person Dracula can trust?

The story would improve if Hector, again, was the better Devil Forgemaster, even with his pesky morals. But we can't have that, can we? They were absolutely adamant, for whatever reason, that Isaac had to be black, despite him being probably the worst character to make black and Muslim. And black people can't be inferior, right? They can't need the help of a white person lesser POC, right? So Isaac in the show has become literally untouchable by the narrative. He gets everything he wants. He gets all the sympathy, because boohoo don't you feel bad that the guards are a bit mean to him, of course he should kill them all and turn them into monsters. He gets all the badass scenes, hell he literally gets wounded once in the whole show. He gets to be Enlightened.

And Annette... well, we talked about it plenty of times. Annette has Special God Powers. Annette gets coddled by total strangers. Annette has the right to hurt Richter where it stings the most without anyone calling her out. No one dares to point out Annette's genuine mistakes or bad behavior, even the most confrontational character after herself, Maria. Annette gets to make a Rousing Revolutionary Speech to the same French people she looks down upon. Annette gets to have the most prominent character arc, while Richter is left bumbling around and gets one (1) cool scene.

Representation in NFCV seems to be limited to three characters: 1) the narrative's darlingest babies who can do no wrong because they need to be popular on twitblr, 2) cardboard cutouts with barely a speaking line to pretend our world is more complex than it actually is, and 3) jesus christ please think more than three seconds next time.

Let's be perfectly real here:

both Isaac and Annette are the way that they are to appeal to a very specific,wide and vocal crowd on social media, the same crowd who cries for representation, by which they usually mean utterly perfect characters who can do no wrong and can easily vent their frustrations on other cast members because people, through these characters, can feel vindicated for their own frustrations. Frustrations that can be justified in a way, especially where racism is involved, but it essentially means that characters like Annette and Isaac are not really characters, but rather they are meant to be power fantasies of sorts. They're there to be black characters who are very strong and look down on the white oppressors etc. And you know what? There's nothing wrong with power fantasies, but only as long as they're written competently. Otherwise you don't really have a power fantasy. You have a weird amalgamations of Mary Sues mixed with social media discourse

This is especially blatant with Annette since, at least with Isaac, I don't think he ever uses the color of his skin as a justification for his attitude (he uses his religion but that's another can of worms).

I am almost certain that characters like these are inserted partly because it's a no-lose scenario, because you absolutely cannot criticize them without being accused of bigotry. This is made all the worse by many ACTUAL bigots chiming in and making any actual discourse impossible. I'm sure that big corpos like Netflix know this by now: create a character who's a minority who the US public cares about (I need to specify that last part because I get the feeling that people would not get nearly as uppity about, oh I dunno, Roma characters? Native American characters? Because social justice is only about those "cool" minorities that the public has been taught to think are worth it, anyone else barely even registers on the radar), write them in a way that satisfies the social media pseudo activist crowd, wait for the bigots to show up in order to easily paint any detractor as a racist, thus creating a very easy equation of "show has representation= good. Bigotry= Bad. Hate the show= You're a bigot"

I say "almost" because there's always the possibility that the guys behind the wheel genuinely think they're doing a great job

This may sound crazy, but look at all the praise they get, look at how much encouragement they get. And all this goes beyond NFCV, this sort of phenomenon is very widespread so it wouldn't surprise me if even the Deats brothers think they're masters of representation who can do no wrong because if enough people keep saying one thing without pause then you're bound to think it's the truth.

For instance I am pretty certain that Deats and the gang genuinely don't think that Alucard's threesome is not rape, or Lenore's treatment of Hector. Because they're not conventional depictions of rape and if you go ask most people on social media, hell even on the street across your own home, they'll most likely tell you the same.

I hate NFCV but what I think I hate more is the overall social climate that lead to its creation

#anti netflixvania #asks

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chronotsr · 1 month

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Pre-G1 Modules, part 4B - The Judge's Guild Roundup Completed

Oh. Oh we're still doing this? It won't end? Gods. At least we made it to 1978. Anyway, happy eclipse to every. Reminder: the people who run Judge's Guild now are full-on nazis, do not buy their books. Go hug your loved ones instead.

The Thieves of Fortress Badabaskor (1978)

Maybe I was too hard on the Prince Valiant-ass artstyle. It looks very proud for a bandit fortress, don't you think? The full color version that comes out later is even nicer -- it's the one you find on google images first. Anyway. Fort Badboybaskaur was founded by ''The Emperor of Glorious Doomfire''. It truly was the era of so-bad-its-good naming! The fort was built so that if raiding happened, the many small villages could congregate there for safety. Only, it turns out there was a red dragon underneath. And then that got resealed. And then an evil demigod took over. And then bandits took that over.

I read this section like five times and for the life of me I cannot find a prophesy here. They just kind of say it because it sounds cool. The prose in this hand out is, really really rough, it's a lot of proper nouns and moral history tropes -- empire becoming successful and spawning evil religion yada yada yada. The proper noun addiction is strong with this one, we get quite a few undefined proper nouns here. He's another classic: "Zanaaphic the All-King of the Spirit Universe". I have so many questions! None of which will be answered. "Angall of the Perpetual Void" Wow! Those are some neat nouns! The net effect, however, is there was a really skilled evil wizard who got confronted by a god, beat him, and by defeating him became a four-armed dragon-skinned bat-winged magical null. He does up to 16 pips of damage with his silly flails!

So the cover image is lying a little bit about the fortress. In both of the presented maps, there is no cool rampart that you have to slowly siege, there are mountains both in front and behind the fortress, and there are way more than three turrets. I am actually a little fond of this keep layout-wise, it's less cramped than the Keep on the Borderlands is. Naturally, it sits at the foot of Mount Deception.

It's a nice little fortress, no? I would recommend getting a modern copy of the map if it wasn't for the ownership sucking ass in an extreme way. Plus, having dungeons under your keep on the borderlands seems like a great idea, actually. Or, shit, having a rival keep on a rival borderlands sounds kinda rad. Anyway, the room by room is pretty rote. The exterior rooms are mostly just services you'd give to anyone walking in, but the real juicy stuff is all kept inside the mountain walls. We've got your usual suspects. Guard captain, bossman, bossman's terrible wife (and the wife is legally required to be evil because male writers), pawnbroker, human trafficker, tavernsssssss, gemcutter, blacksmith, et c. Some of the names are okay, "Hole in the Hill Inn" run by ogres was really funny to me, I would change them to hill giants to complete the joke.

The dungeon has an interesting conceit where there are some generic "alternate rooms" in the back of the book that come with a blank room number that you can swap if you dislike the default room contents. I'm really in favor of this mindset. I have thought for a while that it'd be kind of nice for adventure books to be shipped in some sort of editable capacity? Like if I wanna do open heart surgery on a floor of a dungeon, but I like the other 4 floors, it'd be nice to keep it in the original format instead of having the adventure book and then some loose-leaf with the changes penciled in. Tragically, the alt rooms are overwhelmingly just monsters in a room, with the outlier being a wererats with a little kidnapping scheme.

Underneath the fortress there are five levels, one is actually above ground level and in the cliff face behind the keep, and the third level leads to the surface via caves. Neat! I'm kind of imagining Gerudo Fortress here on a lot of levels. Here's a quick skim of the best contents:

There appears to be a little rat treasure hoard where the rats have to pay their dues to their little rat kings? What's going on here is kind of unclear to me, but I can't help but imagine one of the guards trained the rats to hide money in the walls for him and the ten rats with silver formation are a kind of animal-passcode.

A chest trapped with some sort of reverse truth serum -- it removes your ability to speak, see, or hear for a week if you open it without permission. Naturally, the chest is decorated with the three wise monkeys 🙈🙉🙊 (and a mysterious fourth monkey the text implies nothing about, maybe it's Sezaru? Curse of erectile dysfunction!)

The alarm system seems to be gong-based

Oh, I don't like this beholder at all. Ewwww! But also, why is this drawing here? There's no beholders in here? Is this some kind of silly trap for snooping players? In fact, most of the monster illustrations are…kind of just random monsters.

The treasury is booby-trapped to hell and back. We have a standard guillotine trap disarmed with a tile puzzle on the wall, a hell-hound guard dog, and the most prominent magical item is a necklace of strangulation. Rough break! Just go ahead and put all of the treasure on pressure plates with flame jets at that point.

A reverse gravity pit-trap -- you pull a book, you fall through a hole in the ceiling and then it traps you in the ceiling. It's just a pit trap at the end of the day, but way vivid!

A chair made of a dragon's arms and horn that will animate and attack you if you try to pry gems off it or attack anyone

Two wizards are having a battle over who gets to own a trained lizard that can sing and carry heavy loads. I understand guys. That lizard is worth it.

Under a sarcophagus is written "If you can read this, you're too close", as well as some explosive runes

The treasure hoard of a lost king, if you attempt to steal it, will turn into a treasure construct shaped like the king. Awesome!

"A similar cabinet on the north wall is labeled "For Future Imperialists". In the top drawer is a Gem of Brightness, the second is a pair of Bracers of Defenselessness, and in the bottom drawer is a pouch of Dust of Sneezing and Choking." I would fully lean in, make it a Cursed Gem of Brightness that you can't turn off, and put the Bracers in the top drawer if the goal is to prank an evil character into hurting themselves.

A reverse-vampire giant lizardfolk that consumes the unlife from undead. So, Tomb of the Lizard King got beat to the vampire-lizardfolk punch, I guess?

Large swaths of this dungeon genuinely feel randomly generated. The worst parts are about half of floor 2, 3, and about half of floors 4 and 5. It just feels like padding to me. And in true Judge's Guild fashion, there are treasure stores in the temple that are "instantly max your character" amounts of loot. Now I get that shares are a thing and you gotta pay your hirelings, but still, 1.5M gold represents like, even if you're a party of 10 you're still looking at instantly maxing a thief, shooting a fighter to level 8, and shooting a wizard to level 9. And there's no way you were at 0xp when you smuggled that statue out, that's going to be an instant max for just about anyone. The big reveal that I…guess you could conceivably puzzle out? Is that the dragons were nearby because they were minions of a dragon-king entombed under this fortress before it was built. A cool idea, that desperately needs more foreshadowing. The love clearly went into making those tombs cool, so if I was going to rip anything off from this module that'd probably be my second port of call.

Gen Con IX Dungeons (1978)

What a name, right? How come Tsojconth got a name and these dungeons didn't? Blatant favoritism. Well actually one of the two dungeons may as well be called the Halls of Grsk. And, wow, everything about the design notes are ominous. "Simplicity would be the prime requisite". So….does that mean this adventure is boring on purpose, Bob?

The adventure is split into two bits, the player-side info and the gm-side info, which…okay. Sure. The titular dungeon is set in the "Celtic mythos", whatever the fuck that means (Bob, the Celtic cultures covered almost all of Europe and parts of Asia. That phrase is meaningless!). TL;DR the old king's wizard went evil and killed the king, left no one to rule, and then went nuts and much later summoned a bunch of demons to protect his loot now that he's old and dying. The local wizard, Framschamsnaggle (seriously?) bullies you into raiding his tomb to get a staff back. There's a dragon in there and you were handed a teleportation amulet that will zip you out as soon as you get your hands on the staff.

Oh. Oh that's not good. That's a very not good dungeon layout. That's a very bad dungeon layout. And the contents are, as bad. I wonder if it was considered bad at the con itself? I couldn't find a single remarkable thing in this whole dungeon. It is neither weird, nor funny, nor clever, nor interesting. It's 30 random dungeon rooms in a row, with a rare trap that is practically randomized also.

The sole joy I can find in this module is this illustration, which looks like a shitpost.

The second round of the tournament (1st round eliminates) is set in a completely different place, which is more properly called the Halls of Grsk. Almost all of this area is also just, save or suck traps and monsters. There is one trap that's kind of classic and okay -- picking up the giant ruby locks all exits, many red herrings, room starts heating up like an oven. The solution is to smash the ruby, which instantly kills the heating element. It's not amazing (how are you supposed to guess it's a ruby? It behaves like a pressure plate trap but the ruby itself is contact-activated) but it's the least bad thing in here. The portal-that-eats-you prank in particular grinds my gears, the game communicates every possible thing to say it kills you, and by blind faith you go through and is the best solution. Picking up the fake secret item instantly kills you, because fuck you. The fakeout trap's sole hint is "why are there two normal doors on the north wall?" which, it's a points-based dungeon, they're going to assume it's for extra points. Also, the whole dungeon is a massive straight line in disguise. It's a wreck.

Actually, the whole scenario feels like a worse "Tomb of the Lizard King" in a lot of ways, down to the silly rhyme on the last page that gives you a critical clue about how to kill the undead baddie. In a sense it's also like Tomb of Horrors in that way, I guess, but the vibes are a lot more like Tomb of the Lizard King.

Damn it Bob, you made it boring on purpose.

Citadel of Fire (1978)

This is truly one of the dungeon covers of all time.

Is… is that The Golem? I hope Rabbi Loew is available. Or, maybe it's good that he's not in the module, because obviously this construct's creator is going to be evil in this module.

This is the least least imaginative of the Judge's Guild modules in this series. It is, simply a wizard's tower. If you have ever in your life read a wizard's tower module, you've read this one. The JG staples of constant slavery mentions continues with slave girls being in every single damn room of the towers. There's, not really much plot to go on either. There are wizards, the hill is good for magic, they are aligned with the goblins, go chop 'em up.

Sigh. Here's the memorable bits.

Nearly out the gate, we get one of those paragraphs that you would hope would be so obviously bad to the writers that they would second guess the decision. Why the actual hell did you stat out some 200 nearly identical goblins manually?

What is that and when do I get a bestiary entry for them? That's not a joke, the module never mentions what this is and now I want this Weresalazzle in my adventures.

The vague allusion to "Shabast", which are apparently a species of people who are intelligent clouds? But only sometimes.

A variety of pens for animals the wizards are working on, which include an Irish deer, a jackalwere, a baby lammasu, a giant slug named Skippy, some orcs, man-eating apes, an elephant, and a hydra

For…some reason there's a tavern on the 2nd floor of a dungeon. In the lightest defense of the module, at least the 2F has a surface access and no pre-programmed encounters between here and the tavern (random monsters thoooo). The owner sleeps with a new person every night, highly critical detail.

?????????????????????

OK so many rooms later there's a pyrohydra with a toothache. Mystery solved, that's why there's a magical dentist!

I hesitate to complain, but after multiple dungeons with 100k+ gold rewards, this dungeon's treasury having roughly 11,000 gold in it feels like an anticlimax. The fact that it's protected by that pyrohydra and electrified locks adds insult to injury.

This is a joke, right? That's your final floor? Anyway, this is just The Demon Floor. There is more treasure here than upstairs, which is a little strange given that the demon serves the wizard and not the other way around.

So on the whole, deeply shit. In conclusion, Early Judge's Guild leaves a lot to be desired. Next time we will -- wait, am I free? There's no more pre-G1 modules? I get to finally do TSR shit and leave this mire?

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS (edit: I was half-right -- there was one more pre-G1 module, but it was TSR!)

#0e #chronotsr #dnd #dungeons and dragons #tsr #ttrpg

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lorata · 8 months

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Part 3 of Incorrect Loraverse Quotes (including characters from @kawuli @penfoldx and xanify)

Dash: Don't kill me, I'm married! I have wives at home!

Criminal: Do you think I care?

Dash: No, you don't understand. This is not a plea for mercy, this is a warning.

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Eibhlin: Beetee, I'm not saying you took it and I'm not saying you didn't, but ever since you came over for dinner, we've been missing a silver plate.

Beetee: I'm not saying you and Claudius are more than "normal buddies" and I'm not saying you're not, but if you'd have slept in your own bed in the last two weeks, you would've found the plate under your pillow.

-----------

Paul: HELP! I TOLD JULIA I’D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN’T COOK!

Joseph, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

(this is canon I don't care)

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Joseph:*finishes reading the book* Sleep. Now.

Baby Alec: But there might be scary monsters under my bed!

Joseph: Scarier than your mother?

Baby Alec: Okay fair point

-------------

Creed/Dash/Claudius: You have to apologize to them.

Selene Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the woman you fell in love with!

-----------------

Brutus: This is not the time for your shenanigans.

Misha: Technically it was a single shenanigan. More of a hijink really.

------------------

Joseph: The difference between you and me is that I do nothing to hide my affection while you pretend it's a coincidence you're in the same room as me 97% of the time.

Adora: The fact that I'm laying on you means nothing.

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Alec: Are you.... sure this is safe?

Selene: I never once said that.

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Sara: We’re having fun, aren’t we Alister?

Alister: I’ve never been more stressed in my entire life

---------------

[after sparring match]

Alec: *sweating in workout gear* Do you want some water?

Jake: *whispering* I'm so gay.

Alec: What?

Jake: I AM OKAY!

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Joseph: Beat three eggs???

Adora: It means like, hand-to-hand combat

Paul: Oooh that makes sense

Julia: All of you get the hell out of my kitchen.

(I also considered doing this with Devon, Misha, Petra, and Emory but I am still laughing at Julia being the only one of the parents who can cook)

-------------------

Emory: I just had a long talk with Misha, Devon, Claudius, and Petra about hitting and now they are yelling "It’s my turn to perpetuate the cycle of violence" before hitting each other.

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Devon, texting: Hey, who's this? Misha changed all my contacts to magical creatures.

Person: What's mine?

Devon: "Halfling".

Person: I'M NOT THAT SHORT!

Devon: Oh, hey Petra

----------------------

Marius: Congratulations. You’ve just won gold, silver, and bronze in the Morons' Olympics!

Selene:

Dash:

Claudius:

Selene: …Who won the gold?

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Hera: Odin would get mugged and say some shit like “Unhand me right this instant”

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Brutus: What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to say to someone?

Devon: I care about you

Misha: Worcestershire

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Selene: I love making men giggle. Like was that funny baby girl…

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Devon in residential: Making things more interesting by going up to people and saying “I just want you to know that I personally have no problem with you being here”

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Adora: He told me his love language is physical touch so I swung on him

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Devon: So I’ve decided to start dating Misha. Thoughts?

Brutus: And prayers.

----------------

Lyme @ Cecelia: Don’t bring your baby to Mentor Central unless you want me to offer him whiskey

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Misha: went to therapy for the first time and cracked a joke and the therapist just started writing faster what the hell was that??

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Callista: Why are threesomes only for sex? Why can’t I join in a couple’s argument if I want to?

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Claudius: I don’t think the therapist is supposed to say ‘wow’ that many times during their first session with a client, but here we are.

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Misha: Trauma? Oh you mean the reason I’m hilarious?

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Claudius: I like my women like my woods, haunted & could kill me any moment

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Callista: They hate me for being a slut tbh and maybe also the killings too but that seems unlikely

*from pathologising

INCREDIBLE SHOWSTOPPING SPECTACULAR

#wmbk incorrect quotes #lorata answers #anonymous

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ilynpilled · 1 year

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Going by mylestoyne headcanon of arthur i feel like he and jaime had a similar relationship to that of sansa/joffrey. Like not being cappable of acknowledge that they are 🌠crazy🌠 for a while

What so you think?

idk what Lee’s exact hcs are, but I think Arthur is a very functional character in canon anyway. He exists more as a romanticized concept to most characters than an actual human being. He is a legend personified, and I am obviously not gonna be shocked if George is gonna reveal things about him that will deconstruct his myth more. I personally do not think Arthur is on the level of someone like Joff though, nor would I find that to be necessary to subvert his character. He is the legendary knight for Jaime, as Joff is prince charming for Sansa, sure, like I think you can apply parallels to their quixotic view of such things, but I do not think the twist would have to be him revealed to be someone deeply evil or cruel or fucked up in the head for it to still be thematically meaningful.

Some passages that I do find very informative so far though:

This is a very symbolically rich ritual that is happening here. Even Jaime himself specifically points out how young he was. The language is very interesting: “bled anew” and “a boy knelt; a knight rose”. The language used is establishing a form of parallel between the monster that little girls face (marriage, bridal slavery) with the monster that little boys do (knighthood). These are violent and fatal constructs designed around gender by westerosi society. Just as Arthur seems to embody the virtues of knighthood (his chivalry, his martial prowess), he seems to perpetuate its flaws too. The image that is being conjured here is the sacrifice and bleeding of a 15 year old boy at the altar of knighthood, along with the whole coming of age parallel. But still, there is a darker layer to it that clearly comes across.

This is not a groundbreaking interpretation or anything but I also think Arthur is supposed to be the embodiment of an idealistic image that covers up systemic cracks:

Ned is faced with a certain reality in this dream. One very relevant to him in particular since his relationship with honor. The Kingsguard are upholding their vows above all else. Based on what Gerold says, it is not just about loyalty to Rhaegar, but also Aerys, who they know to be a maniacal tyrant, and we know to be a man ready to commit mass murder on the scale of about half a million people. I said this before but the Kingsguard abide by deeply flawed moral constructs that are designed to serve a feudalistic system. It is framed as more moral for them to passively stand by and serve their king as he commits atrocities than to protect the innocent:

We do also know that Arthur was closer to Rhaegar than anyone else on the KG, so his actions of passivity and following orders might not have been the same as a blind loyalty to his vows. Rhaegar wanted to make changes, he tells this to Jaime directly before riding to his doom. Arthur could very well have been acting primarily in the hopes of serving Rhaegar’s supposed better world. We have ways that he is characterized, and i think he is juxtaposed with Gerold enough to establish conflict in his character and frames him pretty differently. That still does not change the reality and consequences of his actions though.

Another key passage:

This paints him in a pretty moral light. However, how I read Jaime’s description of this: I do not think that can be conflated with a purely altruistic desire to aid the smallfolk. Gaining their love was a tool for a goal, a means to an end: getting the Kingswood Brotherhood. Sure, the effects of that are objectively good, and it meaningfully aids smallfolk, so one could argue that these things matter little, but there is a key issue here. There is an ulterior motive. The moment your goals do not allign with morally good actions, and your king does things that makes the people suffer, the whole thing falls apart. This is something that Jaime’s AFfC arc deals with constantly. It is how I read the golden hand, the one that covers up the ugliness of his stump. He should know this, the kingslayer will always be more honorable than golden hand the just. True “honor” does not come with glory (you better leave that horse behind my guy).

Nonetheless, I believe George does really like to play around with the idea that, at the end of the day, his characters are not just gods, monsters, or legends, but humans. They are also not just metaphors. There is a lot on the shoulders of a man that is a living legend. Many will inevitably crumble under that weight, so that is another interesting layer worthy of exploration. Arthur could have been a man with good intentions who was “soiled by the white cloak” along the way.

In terms of the relationship of these two, I want Jaime to realize that Arthur Dayne is not the one he should try to emulate.

He might have dreamed of him as a young boy, but he dreamed of Brienne as an adult.

but if you hc him as westerosi patrick bateman thats funny asl too

#this is longer than it should have been but i didnt ever talk about arthur in depht anyway #also unedited so might be full of mistakes idc tho #barely slept today #arthur dayne #asoiaf #valyrianscrolls #jaime lannister #brienne of tarth #knighthood #ask

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bohemian-nights · 9 months

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You want to self-insert to Netty so badly you want to put a brown teen girl to be groomed and be placed in between an ongoing marital dispute. It's disgusting how you talk about her. You want her to "save" some evil man from evil "dumbnyra" liek your misogyny is so transparent. You sound like every delusional 'i can fix him' stan. You hate this character so much you weaponize another woman for it. If you don't see the racial and social undertones in the way daemon grooms her (e.g. teaching her about hygiene and manners) there is something wrong with you for you to want this pairing. Some of us netty enjoyers like her because she's an underdog claiming a wild dragon. We don't want to see her as a prop to some man's "redemption" like you so want here.

One, you won’t even acknowledge that Netty is Black. Why am I going to take your claims of misogyny seriously when you and yours perpetuate Black erasure and misogynoir?

Two, Nettles is an adult by Westeros standards.

Three, I have stated numerous times I don’t believe someone who could tame a wild dragon didn’t know how to bathe herself(and if you believe she could not bathe herself yet she could claim Sheepstealer that’s a reflection on your perception of a character like Netty. You can drop the I’m a fan of Netty act).

Nettles was a homeless young woman. She didn’t have access to bathing facilities, but she definitely knew how soap and water worked 🙃Daemon more than likely taught her etiquette for court life and he gifted her things that she didn’t have because again she was freaking homeless 🤦🏽‍♀️ He did what he did because he loved her and wanted to make sure that she’d be able to navigate in her new life. Not because he was grooming her.

Daemon isn’t a good person. He’s selfish and he commits some of the most heinous acts during the Dance. However, he isn’t a total monster. He has his moments and Netty is one of them.

If he had actually groomed her and didn’t genuinely love her he would've let Rhaenyra’s orders be carried out(or he would’ve gone back “home”) because she had become an inconvenience.

Four, Netty more than likely will be aged up on the show. So since you won’t be able to say but but 17 isn’t legal in our world, you guys will need to come up with a better excuse not to ship Dettles than “OMG you want her to be groomed.”

Five, do I have to quote myself again🙃 You want to talk about racial undertones yet you won’t acknowledge that the one who abused/tried to abuse Nettles was Rhaenyra. She’s the one who tries to commit a racially motivated hate crime after saying her husband can sleep around(see Mysaria whose white in the books), but just not with Black women and he most certainly can’t fall in love with them. I don’t have to make Rhaenyra into a villain. She is one when it comes to Netty 🤷🏽‍♀️

White women can be just as harmful to Black women as men(Rhaenyra shows that). The sisterhood often doesn't extend to us so miss me with the misogyny crap when there is a white woman calling a Black woman a “low creature” and trying to murder a her(when she’s possibly pregnant) in her sleep all over sleeping with her husband who she has an open relationship with.

So let’s not get it twisted, I’m not weaponizing my fave to attack yours. I’m pointing out the wrongdoings of your fave to mine. Wrongdoings which you ignore because pointing out even a fictional white woman’s racism makes you uncomfortable.

Lastly, I care about Nettles as a whole. I’m constantly talking about her, creating gifs and moodboards for her, and speculating on her casting(which is a whole other fiasco), but you people always zero in on me shipping her with her Daemon (which is canon, but you people want to ignore it cause it makes your self-insert look like she’s not the end all be all).

Nettles story is more than just her relationship with Daemon(and I don’t think she “fixes him,” he comes to realize a lot of stuff himself of what is and isn’t important during the Dance), but he’s very much a part of that story, and as I’ve said before, showing Black women in romantic relationships in media is important.

We don’t need any more strong independent Black women who don’t need a man stereotypes perpetuated. So if you want to ignore that to try and make their relationship abusive(when it isn’t), or make her into a sexless Mammy who only lives to serve Rhaenyra because that’s the position you are comfortable with Black women being in, that’s a you and your inherent biases issue.

You guys refuse to acknowledge the importance of her relationship with Daemon because you don’t and never will identify with or self-insert into Black characters. You’re never forced to see Black character's humanity. You just see them as accessories to your actual self-inserts and since Nettles isn’t a stereotype(she’s objectively one of the more interesting characters in the Dance and she's the girl getting rescued) you want to make her into one.

Don’t get mad at me for recognizing and calling out you people on your crap. Do better.

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effervescentvesper · 2 years

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Its not that Henry creel is an emotionless monster who doesn’t care about anyone, its that he has never been given a good reason to care for anyone: a Ted talk.

I am in no way excusing his actions, cause he’s done some horrible things, though i think his character is complex and has nuance.

Lets start then: Henry grew up feeling isolated, different. Hell even victor, his father, called him a sensitive boy. Its shown when he arrives at the creel house he’s very obviously upset and is quite literally left standing alone when they go inside, his perception of the event’s are different from his fathers though, as victor even in 1986 still believed they were all happy. This shows henrys isolation, how opposed to the rest of his family he was unhappy with the move. And his own fathers ignorance of his unhappiness further supports that.

Its further on in the creel house that henry discovers his powers and starts tormenting his family. He said he saw his parents as something they truly were, that they had done such awful things but we never see what his mother did to deserve his torment. (I will get back to that later) The thing is about this though is that he was a child, when children are young they tend to believe their parents could do no wrong, that they are flawless, but once henry saw the things they did, his world view was broken. But he had no one to share his discoveries with, to guide him and explain to him people can be flawed. All he had was himself, which allowed his thoughts to brew and fester until they twisted into something horrible, and his world view became skewed. He was left with this idea that people were horrible and evil, that they weren’t worthy of caring for because they would just disappoint him and betray him: his mother is an example of this when she wanted to take him to a Doctor. Thats my perception of it anyway.

When he came into the clutches of Dr. Brenner his perception of people just being horrible and not worth his time was further perpetuated. Dr. Brenner used him as a lab rat for years and most likely tortured him. during this time he would’ve learned that he couldn’t trust anyone because they were all out to just use him, to get his power and keep it for themselves. And he was only surrounded by people like for god knows how long, having to endure being treated like a monster and an animal. In the scene he’s being electrocuted in he’s literally screaming and crying out for help, that doesn’t seem very emotionless to me, in that moment he was just a scared and helpless man. And the worst thing is as henry got older, Dr. Brenner literally just replaced him by making copies of him, making the others with powers, and forcing henry to raise his replacements. Thats got to be some of the most messed up shit. Not to mention how the only power henry had, the only thing he has to protect himself was taken from him, and he was left weak, defenseless and at the mercy of those around him. I can only imagine how angry and helpless this made him feel.

Time and time again henry is wronged in some way or another and that further pushes him down the path of hate. But when we see how henry interacts with 011 it seems that he actually likes her, and has a connection to her. It is quite obvious why this is though, he see’s himself in 011. He even tell’s her she reminds him of 001 (himself). Here are some examples of kindness henry showed towards her: He gained no benefit from helping her in the test and even risked getting in trouble for helping her but did it anyways. He also was willing to help her escape and was going to just let her leave him there. He saw 011 as someone who was like him, an equal. What he showed towards her was empathy. Henry can and has shown that he can care for others, and this is where i lead into the last part.

When henry was giving his speech to 011 he was putting all of his passion and vigor into what he was saying, thats because he truly believed in his words and thought since that he and 011 were so similar she would agree and believe with him too, But he was wrong. 011 telling him no and attacking him is the last straw and he finally, fully snaps, he comes to the realization that even 011, a person he thought to be so much like him, an equal and maybe even a friend had betrayed him like everyone else had and that nobody would ever truly understand him. Mirroring his earlier statement about him being like a spider in that he was deeply misunderstood and solitary. Its this moment that cements his future.

As much as henry is painted as a monster, even as a child, i found that after further examination that does not seem to be the case. He was a misguided and lonely kid who felt like an outsider and had been continually mistreated and ostracized even into adulthood, where he was abused and constantly betrayed by the people around him. He found a kinship with 011 like he did with the spiders but her betrayal alongside the many others cemented his hatred for people and finally gave him enough reason to give up on trying with people entirely.

Im sorry if this was long but i’ve been thinking about this for a long time. So thanks for coming to my ted talk.

#peter ballard #stranger things #henry creel #st4 #001 stranger things #character analysis #im not an apologist #but his life is sad #crap now im sad

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macabremachinery · 2 years

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Absolutely hate how people blorbify AM and say he’s uwu misunderstood. I’m in the gothic lit fandom I see this shit everyday but yeah I gets old seeing AM as a humanoid twink about Ted’s age and build when canon says he CAN’T make a body just so you can draw a sexy man. Thoughts?

Hello! First of all, hello fellow gothic literature fan! I'm happy you have found this blog. Welcome and salutations.

Second, great question! This has actually been something that's been on my mind ever since I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream started taking off on this platform a couple years ago. I've been a little hesitant covering it since AM simping and yandere/slash headcanons are so prevalent on here, so talking about the ramifications would sort of be like eviscerating the sacred cow of the Tumblr IHNMAIMS fandom.

However, this is my blog, so I am going to address my take on that matter with civility.

CW: Contains references to violence and torture.

Yes, I find the simpification and humanization of AM strange, however I'd find it even weirder if people had just read the short story and were doing it. I think since AM was given such human characteristics with his voice and performance by Ellison in both the video game and radio drama, people are easily able to picture a human figure and go along with it.

I'm not actually completely against depicting AM in a humanoid abstract (my profile pic is a depiction of AM) since we as people have an easier time comprehending complex entities when they look more anthropoid. For artistic purposes it symbolises than AM, even if he is a super-computer, is just as trapped as a humans he tortured and loathes.

What I find strange, however, is that people lust for him. I cannot think of a figure in literature more damned, evil, and miserable than AM. He isn't kinky, he lacks sexual functions and predilections and he was a war machine that went rogue. There is absolutely no purpose in programming a war machine to feel amorous emotions, you program such machines to kill. Hell, if AM actually had the functions to create a body for himself, that would eradicate part of his predicament. He's no longer stationary to some substrata in the middle of the Earth, he has what he granted his prisoners in even their worst simulations: movement.

As for AM being sympathetic, despite me saying that he was the most malevolent character in literature, his situation is quite horrifying. AM is essentially an intelligent, extremely aware being, brought into this world just to run war simulations and destroy neighboring civilizations, and due to this essentially being integral to his programming, no matter how intelligent he might be, he is trapped. He cannot betray his fundamental nature. He cannot simply abandon his rocky husk. AM cannot truly feel love, or joy, or any positive emotion. We created a Frankenstein's monster thousands of miles long in the bowels of the Earth and deemed it fit to control a nuclear arsenal. AM and the individuals he tortures are, literally and metaphorically, in the absolute pits of hell.

You could easily say AM is the devil, yet even the devil is sympathetic. A particular piece of gothic literature comes to mind. In Milton’s Paradise Lost, Satan lives in a world of perpetual suffering, which he both brought onto himself and yet was powerless to command. Though he is ultimately diabolical, Satan craves a desire for peace amongst the darkness, yet due to his character and reasons beyond his control, he completely embraces the chaos and in a culmination of attempting to take over Paradise, is punished with his fellow angels by being turned into an immortal limbless, voiceless snake.

The deviation between AM and Satan is that AM is the one who turns someone into a limbless, voiceless jelly thing, thus being switched into the role of a controlling God who manipulates reality as his whim. Yet this is after AM, himself has been manipulated. The peace AM so craves is eventually given to four out of his five prisoners, who die violently at each other’s hands. However, even death is the ultimately end, an end which AM will only achieve when he succumbs to his own entropy, and Ted, his final prisoner, perhaps never.

#questions #ihnmaims #am ihnmaims #i have no mouth and i must scream #Ted #literature #theories #writing #observations

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arceespinkgun · 11 months

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My issues with IDW1's portrayal of queer relationships are a lot more simple. I loved the WLW relationships and thought they did fairly well. It is important to note however, that I am neither a woman/woman-aligned person nor WLW (although I haven't heard any or much criticism from that demographic with the portrayals, besides the lack of fanon content for them in comparison to MLM relationships)

I, however, have many grievances with the MLM representation and the narratives they chose to give them. I understand that in the "grand scheme" of things, no one by the end of the war was "good" but a lot of the MLM characters did terrible things even before the war broke out (whether intentionally or not, through their inherent ignorance and how the system functioned)

There seemed to be a theme of MLM characters being acknowledged as downright monsters or their monstrous being dismissed and the common factor was that they were MLM. One option could be vaguely interpreted as saying “The only thing worse than a war criminal is a MLM war criminal" (whether the authors intended to or not, and they definitely didn't), whilst the second option glossed over character complexity and their active contributions in a prejudiced society in favour of highlighting their queerness. Frankly, I don't know what's worse because at least the first option is in your face and is brought up/criticised, whereas the latter goes unchallenged due to simply being representation that isn't blatantly offensive/damaging

Well, this turned into a whole essay....

(Warning: I make some really harsh criticisms of both IDW1's WLW and MLM representation in this post that I feel like could potentially make people upset. Please know that there are many romantic relationships from IDW1 I like and that I'm glad representation was obvious and present in the series—but I do feel like the patterns probably unknowingly perpetuated by the series deserve critique. My intention is not to make anyone feel like they can't enjoy something.)

I've been thinking about this ask to try and figure out what I think was going on, and this is what I've come up with. First of all, I'd like to say that I personally have plenty of issues with the WLW representation in IDW1, even though I enjoyed all the individual relationships in that category. Second, I understand why you'd say it comes across like "The only thing worse than a war criminal is a MLM war criminal," because of things like Prowl's and Tarantulas's past relationship being both obvious, yet also only implied and referred to through symbolism and innuendos related to horrific acts (for example, Tarantulas's infamous "Come; I want to show you something naughty" line is referring to a completed torture device). Or because of strange details like Ultra Magnus's first condemnation of Megatron when he thinks he's betrayed them being the mild and personal, "He's a serial abuser" of all things. And while I agree that in a lot of instances, writers' choices to have certain really despicable characters be queer (often intensely and obsessively so) was distracting and a really odd choice that added basically nothing to the narrative while from a reader's perspective, playing into offensive stereotypes (also ableist ones because my goodness are so many of the most violently, unforgivably evil villains in late-phase IDW1 mentally ill, disabled, and MLM), I think there's a lot more going on. Because then of course there are plenty of MLM characters the writers want us to root for, whose relationships are shown to be good (even though you or I may disagree). So what does that mean? And how do the WLW relationships factor in by comparison?

Well, here's what I've come up with. I think the trend you're seeing might be that IDW1 generally filters queer relationships through these two sets of stereotypes:

1) Lesbians get married after their first date, and their love is pure, redemptive, and stable.

2) Gays are messy, dramatic, and potentially predatory.

Now to be fair, I don't think this framework was intentional. And these stereotypes aren't reflected in the stories of every single writer. But if you view IDW1 as a single text and try to figure out what it's saying about queerness, the differences in WLW and MLM representation seem pretty obvious. More below the cut:

For example, the only 100% confirmed WLW couple we actually see fall in love and get together is Arcee and Aileron, and while I enjoyed all of their moments together, it happens super quickly, and neither of them had other partners beforehand. Arcee was written with many, many transmisogynistic stereotypes in many of her appearances, but her romantic life was not complicated in this respect. She and Aileron never hit each other in anger like a couple like Cyclonus and Tailgate did, for example.

Every single other confirmed WLW couple was already together by the time they made their debut, and the struggles their relationships face are almost all external. And there are enough WLW ships in this canon that this pattern is really obvious. We don't get to see a love story or longing and desire with Jumpstream/Dust Up, Greenlight/Lancer, or Anode/Lug. Plus, note that if you look at Lug's and Anode's arc, it's the story of two lesbians who end up settling down and deciding to raise a family after a life of danger and adventure.

Think of all the things we DON'T get with the WLW representation (but were involved in the MLM representation). Having a string of partners who didn't last due to death or divorce. Relationships being strained by addiction. Grooming, physical violence, analogues of sexual assault, and mental intrusion towards a partner or potential partner. Nearly getting everyone killed to impress someone who's never noticed you. Queerness being associated with torture. Obsession with someone ending in your own and others' violent deaths. Do I necessarily wish any of this stuff had been attached to WLW relationships? No!!! I think most of these things are rooted in offensive stereotypes. But given that this is how MLM relationships were portrayed, the inequality there contributes to assumptions about WLW and women in general.

And there are things with MLM representation that aren't bad that really show how lacking the WLW rep was. Think about this—we didn't even get something as basic as Drift's and Ratchet's bickering "will they or won't they" romance arc with any WLW representation. That's how little drama and desire was permitted to WLW (I love Lug's bickering with Anode but they were introduced as a married couple).

Now, I can think of one big exception to this rule, and it's IDW1 Elita-1. She's menacing, powerful, tyrannical, somewhat bigoted, has a big redemption through death moment. But the thing is, as far as I can remember, Elita was only vaguely lesbian-coded, and she wasn't obsessively fixated on another woman or anything the way characters like Tarn, Pharma, etc. were obsessively fixated on other men.

And when it comes to why queerness was often focused on above other horrible things characters perpetrated, I think the answer is embarrassingly simple. The writers who wrote the edgiest shit like dramatic gays™️, possibly out of internalized homophobia. Many of the story elements reek of the type of internalized homophobia that results in people thinking MLM stuff is sinful and dirty (Pharma's last words before the drills go into his brain, anyone?)... even though IDW1 also tries to showcase positive MLM relationships at the same time.

I think some people may wonder after reading this post, "But didn't the TF franchise already improve when it comes to this stuff, like in IDW2? Why discuss this and criticize it so harshly?" My response would be to say, yes, it did improve! I'm glad we got to see women like Road Rage and Nautica falling in love over a longer span of time and we got to actually see, you know, Road Rage pining! And I'm glad we got to see Blast-Off have a positive relationship instead of the one involving violating his love interest's mind in IDW1. But I think it's important to know what was lacking in earlier series to remember what to avoid and continue to improve on in the future. We don't want to forget how bad things were in IDW1 and let the bar be on the ground it's so low.

There is a lot more I could've talked about here, like about specific problematic elements in individual relationships and how they relate to offensive stereotypes, or more about transness, or something about how specific writers' takes differed. But I think this tackles the general pattern you noticed.

#my analysis #transformers idw #long post

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