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#i am most certainly not irl

cynicalmusings · 2 years

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Dark, Steel and Bug (/pos)

also fck yeah Pokémon cool

it seems that my random thoughts are quite the popular occurrence… in that case, get ready for me to spam this blog with more incoherent rambles about cyno /j

#on another note… why do y’all think i’m cool </3 #i am most certainly not irl #wait actually no you guys don’t need to know that #yes. i am cool. effortlessly so.#a master of cool one might say #coolest person alive #as you can clearly see by my running of a self-indulgent x reader fanfiction blog. very cool indeed.#sent: akireon #r answers

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gaymcr · 2 years

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shipcourse posting on here because i make it very clear on here i dont want anti-rpf ppl following me. but anyway. an anti just told me i couldnt ship frerard because theyre both "grown ass men with a dick and balls" LIKE UM.

1) calling gerard a man is. honestly you say that with much more confidence than warranted

2) GROWN ASS MEN WITH DICK AND BALLS CAN BE GAY CAROL!!!!!!! GAY PEOPLE ARENT SOMETHING THAT ONLY EXIST IN FUCKING FANFICTION LAND!!!!! WE ARENT EXCLUSIVELY A THING WHEN YOU WANT TO JACK OFF TO YOUR UWU ANIME BOYS YOU FUCKING MORON. YEAH, THEYRE GROWN ASS "MEN" (IF YOU COULD EVEN CALL GERARD THAT AND FRANKLY I WOULDNT) YEAH THEY HAVE DICK AND BALLS. SO WHAT? SO WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO PROVE WITH THAT YOU CISHETERONORMATIVE PIECE OF SHIT

jesus fucking christ i hate antis

#anti anti #(not proship. i have my problems with proshippers. but i am most certainly anti anti)#purity culture #pro rpf #pro irl shipping #antis dni #and im fucking serious about that

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txmxkis · 4 months

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can't take my eyes off you

pairing. kuroo tetsurou x gn!reader

genre. fluff

wc. 1236........

warnings. HIGHLY self indulgent as usual, basically self ship coded but hopefully still entertaining and relatable, reader has confidence/self worth issues, sappy af, almost certainly has grammar mistakes

a/n. based on me hating being photographed irl. also why is writing so fun but so scary. TENSES ARE SO HARD

“tetsurou. if you take one more goddamn picture of me, i swear i’ll—"

the sound of his phone camera capturing a picture cuts you off mid sentence, followed immediately by your huff of frustration.

"you'll what, hmm? you don't scare me."

he flashed you a big cheesy grin, all the while still pointing the camera at you. you scowl at him, ready to risk it all and attempt a lunge at his phone in order to stop this madness.

you hated having your picture taken and he knew it, but for some reason he chose to ignore that fact, as if possessed by the need to piss you off. he could be really good at that when he wanted to be.

as soon as you initiated your plan of attack, your hand getting tantalizingly close to the offending device, he pulled it just out of reach. hopelessly, you flopped back onto the bed, groaning in frustration.

“why do you hate me."

“now now. would my camera roll be full of someone i hate?"

“if you were planning to kill me, yea. besides, i dont think having hideous pictures of me is exactly helping your argument.”

he just rolled his eyes in response.

you heard the shutter sound once more while your defenses were down. the last straw.

before he had time to react, you grabbed the nearest blanket and covered your head with it, holding on tightly so that he couldn't expose you to humiliation all over again. you probably had a better chance of ruining his plans by hiding than by trying to overpower him anyway.

“hey! get back here!"

his attempts to uncover you were met with shrieks of protest and a tightened clutch on the blanket. not to mention a few wild jabs of your limbs into the air, which if he hadn't so skillfully dodged, might have hurt just a little.

“fine. time for me to look through these and admire the fruits of my labor."

you cringed at the thought of how the pictures looked. how you looked. most of them were probably blurry anyways because of the thrashing that you were doing to escape the lense, thank god.

maybe you could persuade him to get rid of them. maybe you could sneak into his phone later and delete them yourself. maybe—

“you're beautiful, you know."

all thoughts of treachery came to a screeching halt. after sitting there with your mouth open in shock for a good few seconds, you shook your head, moving the blanket with it.

“nuh uh."

“yuh huh."

“nope."

“without doubt."

his tone of finality made you want to scream your throat sore, but instead you lay there quietly, silently disagreeing with him again.

it was relatively quiet for far too long after that, with quiet cackles drifting over from the other side of the bed being the only sound you could hear from underneath your shield. presumably brought on by pictures that were extra stupid. not to mention revolting.

your thoughts were spiralling right along with your mood now, eyes almost welling up with tears, but you stubbornly pushed them back. it seemed ridiculous to get this worked up over something that wasn't necessarily that serious. kuroo was just trying to be playful and you knew that. it was hard not to feel this way, though, especially when it came to something that was such a big insecurity.

he sighed loudly, snapping you out of your head momentarily.

“can you please come out from under there? i swear the camera's not open. i put the phone down and everything.”

“liar."

“am not! i just wanna see your pretty face with my own eyes now."

you grumbled a weak protest before relenting.

“fine. but i swear if you—"

“would you just hurry up already."

“oh my god, alright."

you slowly pulled the blanket from your face, and you could see that he was telling the truth. for now at least. he was lying there right next to you, already staring, as if straight into your soul. god, you wanted to shrivel up and disappear immediately.

“it's rude to stare, you know."

“don’t care."

you felt so awkward and exposed, and the only thought in your mind now was getting out of this conversation.

you started to try and untangle yourself from the blankets and get up out of the bed, only to feel your own arm being pulled out from under you. falling back next to kuroo, you covered your face and made a noise of frustration.

the first thing you saw after pulling your hands from your face again were those amber eyes still fixed on you, a slight grin on that smackable face.

“ummmm, hello? can I leave?"

he shrugged.

“you can do whatever you want."

you tried to sit up and leave again, only to be pulled right back down next to him a second time.

“i- what's happening right now?”

“good question. i changed my mind, you don't get to leave anymore.”

you masked your face with a deadpan expression, only because you were desperately trying to avoid giving him the satisfaction of seeing you crack a smile.

“are you serious right now?"

“as the plague."

at that, you couldn't help but snort.

“and why is it that you're trapping me here?"

“i decided that you have to lie here and listen to me tell you why you're amazing."

“yea, sure, whatever you say."

“i really can make you a list if you want. although i think it would take less time to make a list of reasons why i don't like you."

“i pick that one."

“ha! nice try. hmm, now let's see... you're endlessly stubborn. quiet and standoffish with most people.”

you raised an eyebrow. maybe this wouldn't be so difficult after all.

“though still kind to everyone who deserves it. alluring. determined. passionate even when it's hard. you care so much that it's scary sometimes. ”

you avoided eye contact. okay. at this point you were starting to feel far too exposed again.

"you try way too hard to keep people at arm's length, but if they're lucky enough to be loved by you, they're taken care of whenever, wherever. you're smart, even if you don't think it's true. stunning as well as irresistible.”

when he said that, he caressed your cheek while you basically became one with the mattress.

“and so independent that it feels like you don't need me around sometimes. but also soft and gentle and giving.”

his voice had dropped almost to a whisper when he spoke those last words. at this point, your face was nearly burning off. you were almost sure that he could feel the heat radiating from you.

“okay, okay—"

“and, oh yea, did i mention beautiful? enough to be my wallpaper."

he picked up his phone and flashed it at you, a slightly blurry picture from not twenty minutes before illuminating the screen. you could tell he was proud of himself from the smug grin stretched across his face.

“you're an ass."

“come onnnnn, you love me, admit it.“

right then, your chest swelled with affection for him, so much that it felt like you could suffocate. still, you paused just long enough for him to start acting offended, before smiling softly and speaking quietly.

“yea, i really do. thank you, tetsurou.”

thank you for reading! <3 — txmxkis

#kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo tetsurou x reader #kuroo fluff #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu fluff #hq fluff #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu drabbles #haikyuu scenarios #hq imagines #hq drabbles #hq scenarios #what up its ya boy with more self indulgent as fuck writing #i just want him to love me into loving myself yk #anyways happy valentine's day!!!#screams and runs away #[☂] — rini writes!

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ophelia-writes-fics · 6 months

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i like when you get mad (i guess i'm pretty glad that you're alone) [kilgrave x reader - 18+]

You're a dancer at a club, and your shift just took a weird turn.

Tags (please read!): fem!reader, degradation, some mild praise, spanking, oral sex, face-fucking, cum swallowing, penetration, choking, erotic asphyxiation, unsafe/unprotected sex, face slapping, clit slapping, masochism (reader), sadism (kilgrave), humiliation, biting, scratching, bruising, some minor blood, threats, condescension, painplay, pain kink, minor bondage, edging, orgasm delay, orgasm denial, multiple orgasms, mind control, mention of voyeurism/exhibitionism, slight dacryphilia, overstimulation, hair pulling, posessiveness

Word count: ~7.7k

CWs/TWs:

super dubious consent (reader likes him and consents to everything/is into the things they're doing without being compelled to, but some orders are given that can't be resisted and it's not pre-negotiated, so proceed with caution)

un-negotiated kink and unsafe choking/breathplay (i know you guys know but please don't choke anyone like this and please ask for consent in general but especially with kinks)

it's kilgrave. he's a walking red flag.

i'm not condoning anything irl, but this is fiction and i'm a kinky bitch, so i'm sexualizing this absolute maniac and i am having a lot of fun doing it lmao

You were leaning against the bar, scanning the crowd as you took your first shot of the shift. It was Friday night, with most of the crowd being well-dressed men who looked like they’d just finished with a long day of work, which meant you’d be going home with enough tips to pay your rent early.

The most eager members of the crowd were seated near the stage, where your friend had them utterly captivated with an elaborate pole routine, so you began to search the back of the house for customers who might want something more private. A group of college girls already drunk off Red Bull and vodka, cheering and shouting compliments at the dancers with the kind of unbridled joy and solidarity that only drunk girls can summon…a man who’d clearly been dragged there by his friends, his eyes glued to his phone, his blush visible even in the dimly lit club…a bouncer pulling a particularly belligerent customer towards the door…

There. On the other side of the room was a tall, sharp-featured man in a dark purple suit, sitting alone, looking thoroughly bored with the performance onstage, glancing over at you every now and again with what appeared to be a look of interest. Perfect.

You quickly ran a hand through your hair, took a deep breath, and plastered on your most winningly seductive smile before strolling towards him with as much ease as you could muster in six-inch stilettos.

“Hello there, love,” you purred, leaning forward against the table he was seated at. “Is there anything I can do for you tonight?”

You thought you’d gotten every possible response to that question before. You’d seen everything from polite rejection to aggressive groping to desperate requests for friendship or conversation, but what you’d never experienced and certainly weren’t expecting was a glance up and down your body followed by a discontented sigh and a slight frown, then a “Fine. You’ll do.”

You opened your mouth to tell the stranger off, but before you could, he held up a finger to silence you, then leaned in closer.

“Take me to your most secluded room. Don’t ask any questions, don’t stop to talk to anyone. Go.”

Your head immediately began to spin. Your brain felt cloudy, as if someone had swept every thought from your mind and replaced them with a thick, impenetrable fog. Before you could try to shake the feeling away, your body was already moving, walking briskly towards the back of the club, seemingly completely independently of your own will. Get to a private room echoed over and over, clouding all the other thoughts that you were desperately trying to muster. You felt wrong, like a puppet with your limbs being jerked around by some unseen controller, no free will of your own to be found. No, not a puppet, your mind vaguely registered. A doll.

You heard one of your friends calling you, asking something or maybe just saying hello, but when you tried to turn your head to respond, don’t stop to talk to anyone pierced your skull like a shard of ice, ringing in your ears like an intrusive thought. You didn’t stop walking even for a second. You didn’t even look at your friend. Something was very, very wrong.

Your stomach was in knots by the time you got to an empty room, your heart racing against your ribcage like a trapped bird against a windowpane. You leaned against the wall, trying desperately to steady yourself as the strange man followed you inside.

“Lock the door,” he ordered with a dismissive wave of his hand. The door was closed and bolted shut before you even realized you’d moved.

You tried to say, or even think What did you do to me? But the same cold, cloudy pain overtook your head. Don’t ask questions. You shut your eyes tightly and clenched your fist as your body swayed, shaken by the unfamiliar sensation, feeling your breath grow shallow with panic. When your vision refocused, you stared at the stranger, who was tossing his suit jacket aside, reclined lazily on the couch like he hadn’t a care in the world. He fixed you with an annoyed look.

“God, don’t grimace like that. The least you could do is give me a smile.”

Your face rearranged itself into the same winning, seductively charming smile you’d had on earlier, but you could tell that your eyes weren’t engaged. He didn’t seem to mind, though. In fact, he didn’t seem to have noticed your fear at all, grinning back at you like the devil himself.

“That’s more like it. Now, kneel for me. Arms by your sides, hands in your lap, chin up. There you are.” His smile widened as he watched your body automatically follow his orders.

He stood up and began to pace in a slow circle around you. You felt his dark eyes piercing you, evaluating you, examining your body for any minor flaw or imperfection, even though your vision remained fixed straight ahead and your smile remained in place. The carpet dug into your knees, your stiletto heels stabbing the backs of your thighs. But still, you knelt, unmoving and obedient as he stroked your hair like you were a well-behaved pet.

It felt good, you thought, feeling a knot in your stomach form at the realization. He was incredibly handsome, with fingers as long and slender as the rest of him. You might have invited him back here on your own even if he hadn’t performed what you were growing more and more sure of was mind control. The thought made your blood run cold, but at the same time, you could still feel how red your face was under his gaze.

Your pulse quickened as he moved back around to face you, still with that same analytical stare. His eyes lingered on your chest as he bent down slightly, moving his hand to caress the side of your face. His thumb brushed your lower lip, still frozen in place from where he had ordered you to smile.

“Open your mouth,” he said, and you obeyed, with another rush of arousal immediately followed by shame. He pressed his finger against your tongue, eyebrows raising as you moaned at the touch.

He pressed harder, still keeping his hand firmly on your jaw. “You like this, don’t you? Tell me the truth, don’t hold back.” His voice was low, his tone vaguely threatening in a way you couldn’t quite place.

You nodded, mouth still agape. Your face flushed at the eagerness of your response, the embarrassment at finding pleasure in being controlled so thoroughly sinking deeper and deeper into you. You’d never felt anything like it, and the adrenaline from the initial terror of being manipulated was quickly turning into an aphrodisiac when combined with your attraction to him.

He scoffed - a short, mocking laugh. “My god,” he grinned, straightening up. “Then you can consider yourself a very, very lucky girl.” The swell of pride in your chest wasn’t at all hindered by the way his tone darkened; you couldn’t even tell if you were genuinely delighted at having impressed him or if you were just following his orders and “considering yourself lucky.” From the way your brain clouded over and the way your cunt tightened onto nothing, it might have been both. You groaned slightly at the feeling, then quickly bit down on your lip to try and suppress the sound.

If he noticed, he gave no outward expression. Instead, he reclined back onto the couch, his legs falling open slightly, and he beckoned you forward with a wave of his hand.

“Come here. You can kneel at my feet where you belong.” The way he said it was so light, so casual that you could tell he wasn’t trying to be dominant or turn you on. He just genuinely believed it. God, the ego on him. Still, you started to climb to your feet to walk over.

However, before you could even stand all the way up, he raised a hand to stop you. “Ah-ah-ah. No, none of that. You can crawl. You look ridiculous walking around in those shoes anyway.”

You collapsed back to your knees, cringing slightly at the bruises you knew you would have tomorrow as you crawled towards him.

“Good girl, so you do know your place,” he said, his tone taking on a thick layer of condescension as he patted your head. “Tell me, how often do you sleep with your clients here?” He barely even looked at you as he asked, staring off into the distance as if you were boring him.

“Never,” you replied immediately.

“Never?” He raised his eyebrows, sparing you a quick, scrutinizing glance. “Then what exactly do you do in little rooms like these?”

“Private stripteases. Lap dances. I let some touch me if they pay me enough,” you answered truthfully, realizing only after you’d spoken that he hadn’t ordered you to do so. You prayed silently that your answer was good enough. A voice in the back of your head questioned why you were so desperate for his approval, but it was quickly overcome by another wave of lust.

Despite the work you did, it had been far, far too long since you’d been fucked, especially by a man as pretty as the one seated in front of you. And as much as you hated to admit it even to yourself, whatever power he had was one that you desperately wanted him to use on you. You’d never been so scared or so turned on in your life, and your deep masochistic streak was begging for more.

The man snapped his thin fingers an inch away from your face, snapping you out of your thoughts. You blinked hard, realizing you hadn’t heard a single thing he said since you answered his last question.

“Hey,” he reprimanded sharply, punctuated with a hard slap to the side of your face. “Snap out of it. God, what’s the point of sitting around here with you if you’re not even going to listen?”

“No, wait, I’m sorry, I just—“

He cut you off with a disgusted roll of his eyes. “Don’t grovel. If you’re sorry, find a way to make it up to me.”

You swallowed hard, nodding your head, mind racing. Your eyes flicked down to his lap, then back up to his face.

“May I…well…I mean, would you like me to…” you stammered, mentally kicking yourself for how timid you sounded.

“What? Spit it out,” he snapped.

“Can I please suck your dick, please?” The request was out of your mouth before you even had time to process it.

He laughed again, the same sharp mocking laugh he’d given you earlier, fixing you with a self-satisfied smile. “Oh, you really are desperate, aren’t you? Fine. Hurry up and start. Make it good.”

Of course, you followed his orders. The ice-cold feeling that came with trying to resist felt entirely foreign to you now, and the brain fog that set over you whenever he gave a command barely had time to take hold before you obeyed.

You started slowly, gently licking the tip of his dick before gradually working your way down, letting your mouth adjust to the length, pressing your tongue against him as you gently bobbed your head.

While you were still struggling to take even half of his dick in your mouth, he roughly grabbed your hair, and without warning, shoved your head down to the base of his cock.

You choked hard, tears immediately streaming down your face, but you couldn’t get even a second of relief with the way he held you firmly in place. You took a deep breath in through your nose, but the air was immediately knocked from your lungs as he pulled your head back, then shoved you back down, thrusting forcefully into the back of your throat. You gave a stifled cry and frantically grasped at his leg, trying to get leverage to break away, but you felt him slap your hand away before pinning it against the couch cushion.

“You can take it. You want to impress me, don’t you? Stop struggling and let me fuck your throat.”

Your body went limp, all reflexes to break away and gasp for air vanishing in an instant. You could feel yourself choking, your face dripping with spit and tears, but you didn’t care. Both his hands were twisted in your hair, pulling hard, shoving your mouth onto his cock over and over again like you were a toy. You moaned desperately, half from pain and half from delirious pleasure. After what felt like ages, he ripped you away, forcing you to look into his dark eyes.

“Put some fucking effort into it,” he hissed, releasing your hair from his wrenching grasp. “Show me why I shouldn’t get rid of you right now.”

You immediately set to work, taking as much of him as you could in your mouth and stroking what you couldn’t take with your right hand. You didn’t know what “getting rid of you” would entail. You didn’t doubt for a second that he could kill you. You felt briefly concerned that this didn’t turn you off in the slightest before your thoughts were pulled back to the task at hand.

You sucked hard, running your tongue against the most sensitive places you knew of, gently teasing him, just enough to hopefully make him feel as desperate as you did. Your efforts were immediately rewarded with a low moan that became an almost feral growl, feeling him thrust upward involuntarily. You doubled down, relishing in every sound you could draw from him.

He exhaled sharply when you pulled back, wrapping your lips around the tip of his cock and flicking your tongue, tasting the pre-cum that dripped from him. He reached out, hand tangling in your hair again, but not quite as hard as before.

“Right there,” he sighed, holding your head in place, eyes shut tightly. “Fuck, there you go, right there, just like that, harder…oh, god, what a good fucking girl you are…” As you felt him get closer and closer, listening to the way he moaned for you, you felt yourself grow hot all over, more and more desperate to feel him let go, to cum down your throat.

You whined sharply, pushing even further, your body aching all over with unfulfilled desire. You took every single inch of him, swallowing hard around his cock, pressing your nose to his stomach, ignoring the way your throat tightened and instead focusing on how badly you wanted him, how terribly you wanted to impress him…

Your efforts paid off immediately when he forcibly pinned you where you were, grabbing your hair as he came with a rough, broken shout, his cum hitting the back of your throat.

After what felt like ages, you felt him collapse backward against the couch cushions. You pulled away, quickly swallowing the mouthful you’d accumulated, then opening your mouth and sticking out your tongue to show him how well you’d taken it.

He softly laughed, peering at you with a slightly unfocused look before closing his eyes again, still on cloud nine, chest rising and falling quickly as the overwhelming pleasure slowly subsided.

You leaned your head against his inner thigh, gazing up at him with a lovestruck stare. He looked so vulnerable like this, open and overwhelmed with all the sensations flooding him, a slight smile on his lips.

A man with all the power in the world, everything he could ever want only a few words away, everyone wrapped around his little finger, and yet here he was, your head between his legs, absolutely radiant in the afterglow of his orgasm. You couldn’t stop yourself from smiling.

He really is cute, you thought, even if he is terrifying. You examined his face carefully, taking in every detail — his sharp cheekbones, his thin nose, his dark eyelashes, the soft pink of his lips, the curve of his jawline and neck. There was something almost delicate about him, hidden by how deeply intimidating he was, and you hadn’t noticed it until now. He was just…well, he was just so pretty. There was just no other word for it, even now (or maybe especially now) that his sophisticated appearance was ruffled. His hair, once perfectly combed, was messy, a few dark strands falling into his eyes. His pristine suit was wrinkled, jacket long discarded, his tie partially undone, his shirtsleeves hastily rolled up, his belt and pants unfastened, and to top it all off, his gorgeous cock resting against his stomach, still half-hard. He was a fucking vision. You could have stared at him for ages.

You gently tapped his leg to get his attention. “You know, I don’t actually think I caught your name,” you said, batting your eyelashes a bit. Your smile faded when you were met with a cold silence. He shook his head, straightening up and brushing his hair back into place.

“You don’t need to know my name,” he snapped, all the bliss from a moment ago having vanished as he pushed you aside, readjusting his clothes.

You sat back, thoroughly dejected. You had thought you’d done well. You wanted to make him feel good, and you had, but it wasn’t enough. You shouldn’t have felt like this about one of your clients, but you’d never met anyone else like him, and you wanted more.

Your heart sped up as he reached for his jacket. Gathering his things meant he would leave, and an impulse deep inside you was yelling at you to do something. This wasn’t a job anymore, you needed him. He’d gotten you in the palm of his hand, desperate and wanting, and now that you had done what he wanted, he was acting like you were invisible. You weren’t going to let things go that easily.

You pulled yourself up onto the couch, ignoring the ache in your knees and the pain on the backs of your thighs where your high heels had dug into your skin. Before he could react, you climbed onto his lap, facing him, arms around his shoulders. You’d never broken your “no kissing clients” rule, but that rule was the furthest thing from your mind as you leaned in for a kiss, pressing your lips firmly against his.

With your eyes closed tightly, you barely even realized he had shoved you away until you landed on your back against the leather of the couch. Your eyes snapped open, finding the man standing before you, with a look on his face that was a mix of anger and bewilderment and something else you couldn’t quite place. He opened his mouth as if preparing to ask you something, but he closed it again, turning away from you. You bit your lip as he paced slowly, his hand over his eyes. Had you read the situation wrong? Was he ashamed that he’d come back here with you? Did he not like being kissed? Had you come on too strong? Was it over the line?

Your heart skipped a beat as he stopped, focusing fully on you. You felt cornered, like a prey animal about to be devoured. He looked angry, vengeful, his already dark eyes completely devoid of light as he approached you.

“Strip, then bend over the couch, facing the wall. Now.”

Chills ran down your spine as you quickly undressed. You hadn’t been wearing much before, but naked, you felt completely exposed under his cold glare. You reluctantly turned away, the brain fog coming back like a tidal wave in response to your slight resistance, and you bent over, just like he’d told you to do. You could feel yourself shaking, terrified at the idea of what he would do to you, but with a hint of anticipation that kept you from falling off the edge into panic.

You closed your eyes tightly and tried to ground yourself in the brief moments of silence, waiting for whatever would come next, but they shot open as soon as you felt the sharp, unmistakable shock of his belt whipping you across the backs of your thighs at full force.

You cried out involuntarily, from shock and from the stinging, nearly unbearable pain. You hadn’t even had time to compose yourself when the second hit came, the pain intensifying as he struck the same place even harder. Your skin burned and you felt your eyes well up with tears, but you could feel the heat of arousal inside you growing, your masochistic side alight with pleasure. You wanted more.

“Fuck!” you gasped as he landed a series of quick, searing lashes across your thighs and ass. Your nails dug into the couch as you bit your lip, trying to stifle a scream as the metal buckle whipped into your skin. Your head spun. It stung, so badly you could barely take it, but it felt fucking incredible, endorphins and adrenaline coursing through your body, making every sensation electric as he kept going, relentlessly striking you over and over again.

You were granted a temporary reprieve when he leaned in close to your ear, running his fingernails down your back, hard enough that you knew there would be marks tomorrow.

“Don’t even think about holding back,” he hissed, his lips brushing against your ear as he spoke. “I want everyone outside this room to hear you scream for mercy, and I want everyone to know you’re not going to get it.”

Immediately he resumed his punishment, the sound of the belt hitting you again and again echoing off the walls. Your body instinctively followed his orders and you felt yourself cry out involuntarily, a broken sound halfway between a gasp and a yell. You barely even registered it as your own voice.

Thwack.

A particularly brutal hit made you cry out, arching your back in a desperate attempt to ease the pain.

“Fuck, please…” you begged, feeling like you were on the verge of fainting.

“‘Please’ what?”

Thwack.

The ice cold feeling shot through your brain like a lightning strike. Beg for mercy. Scream for it. You desperately wanted to, but at the same time…

“Harder, fuck, please, harder!”

The words were out of your mouth before you even realized you’d spoken them. Immediately, the room fell silent. You gasped for air, still reeling from the searing pain and the frigid ache of trying to resist him.

He took hold of your hair without warning, yanking your head around to look at him.

“Repeat that,” he snapped.

“I— I want it harder,” you panted, trying to force your blurred vision to focus.

A long, tense pause.

“You like this.” It wasn’t a question.

“Yes, god, yes.”

“Of fucking course you do.”

He grabbed you, turning you around forcefully so that you were facing him, then without warning, his hands were wrapped around your neck, so tightly that you couldn’t even take a moment to breathe in, your windpipe fully constricted.

“I bet you like this too, don’t you?” he muttered through gritted teeth.

You nodded desperately, as best you could with your neck being held firmly in place.

“Listen to me,” he growled. “You live and die by my orders. You have no other purpose but to please me, do you understand? Just look at you. I could do anything to you and you would love it. You get off on being whipped, you get off on being choked half to death…I could beat you senseless and you would cum from it.”

You moaned in ecstasy, but it came out as barely a whimper. You could feel your heartbeat in your temples, your vision going dark around the edges as his fingers dug into your neck.

“I’m going to do whatever I want to you. That’s all you’re good for. Do you understand?”

You tried to answer, but you couldn’t move. Your head was pounding, your throat feeling like it was about to be crushed. You saw stars, multicolored lights popping in and out of your vision. The darkness around the edges was rapidly expanding, bleeding further and further into your line of sight until you couldn’t see at all.

At the last possible moment, before you could feel yourself slip over the edge into unconsciousness, he let go, dropping your limp body and watching you gasp for air, coughing and retching as you struggled to breathe in after being deprived of oxygen for so long.

“Pathetic,” he scoffed, glaring down at you like you were nothing more than dust.

You lowered your head, thoroughly humiliated, pressing your forehead against your knees as you gulped in mouthful after mouthful of oxygen, mind racing. He could have killed you. He could have choked you to death without a second thought and you wouldn’t have been able to stop him, you told yourself, but still, in the deepest parts of your mind, the danger thrilled you.

You needed him to touch you, to hurt you, to ruin you. You wanted him to do whatever he wanted to you, and the thought made your stomach ache with terror as much as it turned you on.

He caressed your hair in a way that would have almost seemed tender if he hadn’t just strangled you half to death. You looked up slightly, and he tilted your chin up so you were face to face. He moved your head slightly to one side, then the other, examining you carefully, and smiled with a sick satisfaction.

“You’ll have bruises on your neck for a week,” he praised with a slap to your cheek. You moaned softly at the impact, closing your eyes to enjoy the feeling.

He bent down, picking you up ever so slightly to rearrange your body in the position he wanted, laying you down and spreading your legs. You could see from your position how hard he was. Your pain had turned him on as much as it had done to you.

You stared up at him as he admired his work, stroking his cock as he gazed at the bruises and welts and scratches he’d left on your skin.

“Come here,” you pleaded, your voice still raw and hoarse from being choked, spreading your legs further.

He was immediately on top of you, his thin hips pressed against yours, hands wrapped tightly around your wrists. “Don’t you dare give me orders,” he spat, but despite the venom behind it, you could tell from the way his hips rubbed against you that he was as desperate as you were. You felt his cock brush against your clit as he bit down hard on your neck, surely adding yet another bruise to the collection you’d accumulated.

You bit your lip, wanting him to just stop teasing, to hurry up and fuck your brains out, but as you were considering whether or not to try and resist his don’t give orders command, you felt the tip of his dick press against your entrance. You’d known it was big, your aching throat was doing an excellent job at reminding you of that, but you still couldn’t stifle a gasp at the feeling. It was just a whole different experience like this.

The beautiful man above you gave you a look that sent chills down your spine.

“You want it,” he whispered, leaning in so close he could have kissed you.

You nodded eagerly, fixing him with a pleading gaze. You hadn’t needed the command in the slightest.

“Beg.”

“Please…” you whined, your nails digging into your palms as you clenched your hands into fists, struggling to keep still. “Please, please…”

“Not good enough. Beg harder.” You had no idea how he managed to sound thoroughly indifferent, even while he was this hard.

Your already racing heartbeat quickened. “Please, I’m begging you, fuck me, take me, ruin me, do anything you want to me, I —fuck— I need it, I need it so badly, please, I’ll do anything…”

That same sadistic, terrifying little smile crept across his face. “Anything?”

“Yes, anything, just please, god, fuck me!”

“That’s what I like to hear,” he murmured, before roughly thrusting into you, as deep as he could possibly get, without giving you so much as a second to adjust.

You couldn’t even try to hold back a scream, and he had the nerve to laugh in your face as he slapped his hand over your mouth.

“Oh, careful, don’t shout like that! They’ll think I’m doing something horrible to you in here,” he grinned, punctuating his words with hard, deep strokes that hit every sensitive spot inside you. “It sounds like you’re in absolute agony. But we both know better than that, don’t we?”

He picked up the pace, throwing one of your legs over his shoulder to fuck you deeper than you’d thought possible.

“You know, I really thought that you’d put up a little more of a fight,” he continued, almost nonchalant despite the grin on his face and the vicious pounding he was giving your sensitive cunt. “I thought I’d have to order you to get off on the pain, or that I’d have to bash your pretty head against the wall to get you to listen. But I got lucky, didn’t I? I just happened to come across the most disgusting, most depraved little whore in the city, so eager and willing to listen, to take whatever I give you.”

The hand that wasn’t keeping you quiet brushed against a sensitive spot on your inner thigh and you all but melted, whimpering with pleasure underneath him as he fucked you harder.

“Oh, that’s it, let me hear you moan,” he said, throwing his head back with a growl, pulling his hand away from your mouth. “You don’t care who hears, do you? I bet you like it. I bet you love knowing that all your little friends and all your clients are hearing you get your pretty cunt ruined by a complete stranger, don’t you? You like them knowing that I hit you and choked you and you still let me fuck you like this. You just love that everyone knows that you get off on me hurting you, that everyone knows you’re just a desperate slut for pain.” He punctuated the last word with a hard, backhanded slap across your face.

You nodded frantically, moaning your assent, hands grasping at his arms, holding on for dear life as he completely wrecked you. You felt him grin as he leaned in to bite your neck, his tongue darting over your sensitive skin as he did so.

Your hand wandered, finding its way to his dark hair, and you couldn’t stop yourself from running your fingers through it, pulling ever so slightly, not wanting to risk his wrath again but unable to resist the temptation. Your eyes widened with surprise when he gasped and moaned, his teeth temporarily leaving your neck before he recovered and bit you again, much harder, this time on a sensitive spot just below your jaw that made you cry out. When he was satisfied with the mark he’d left, he broke away.

“You know what would be fun?” he teased, his tone menacing as he roughly grabbed your breast. You shook your head, unable to take your eyes off him. “I’d just love to see what it would be like if you weren’t such an easy little slut.” He paused, running his hand up your body, admiring the marks he’d left with a self-satisfied look.

“Put up a fight for me. That way, I can show you exactly how filthy whores like you deserve to be treated.” He sat up, his fingers clutching your hips so hard that you knew they’d leave even more bruises on your already aching body, never once faltering in his steady pace.

You flew into action immediately, frantically trying to push him away, trying to kick hard enough to get him off of you, despite the fact that your body was still aching for more. He laughed, a quick cruel sound, almost surprised by how readily you threw yourself into the role of his struggling victim, but he grabbed your wrists and pinned them down above your head without missing a beat, leaving you even more helpless than you already were.

You moaned, feeling the way his dick throbbed inside you when you struggled harder, trying in vain to remove yourself from his grasp. Fucking sadist. You thrashed harder, your body still reflexively following his orders, but to no avail; he had you completely pinned in place.

Almost without realizing you were doing so, you jerked your head upward, biting the exposed skin between his neck and shoulder and digging your teeth in hard, barely even noticing how fiercely you had latched onto him until you tasted blood.

“Fuck!” he shouted, letting go of your wrists, hands immediately moving to grab your shoulders. You let go with a sharp inhale the moment you realized what you’d done, horrified at your own actions. He roughly shoved you down, forcing your mouth away, still fucking you harder than you thought possible.

“God, I should fucking kill you for that, I really, really should,” he growled. He turned his head slightly to look at the bite you’d left, scowling when he saw the blood beginning to seep into the collar of his shirt. He let go of one of your shoulders to grab your chin, forcing you to stare at the damage you’d caused.

“Look at what you did,” he spat through gritted teeth, with a wild, almost manic look in his eyes. “You think you have the right to do that? The right to defile me like that after I’ve taken such good care of you? Answer me.”

You bit your tongue, wanting to point out that ‘taking good care of you’ had involved beating you black and blue with a belt, choking you half to death with his dick, and then strangling you until you were nearly unconscious. Sure, you’d enjoyed all of it, but still.

“Answer me,” he repeated, harsher this time. “Or I swear to god I’ll kill you.”

“You told me to fight back!” The words spilled out of your mouth before you could stop yourself, pettiness entering your voice despite the murderous look in his eyes that made it very clear he had been expecting you to beg for forgiveness.

He stopped moving completely. He was still all the way inside you, and you could barely stop yourself from grinding your hips against him to try and get yourself off, but you didn’t dare move. The hand that had been gripping your jaw released, moving upward to pat your cheek gently.

“I did tell you to fight back, didn’t I?” He was mocking you, his tone sickly sweet and condescending, like you were a particularly petulant child that he was trying to discipline. Against your better judgment, or maybe just to see what he’d do about it, you nodded.

Before you could even realize what was happening, you were in terrible pain, a pain that knocked the air out of your lungs, your eyes immediately streaming with tears from the impact.

It took you a moment to process that he had just punched you in the face as hard as he possibly could.

You instinctively doubled over, curling into a ball, body and mind reeling from the blow. Your ears were ringing, your vision clouded over. It felt like your brain had been shaken vigorously inside your skull, nausea welling up inside you at the sensation, all of it so severe you were afraid you might faint.

In your dazed state, you could barely absorb what he was saying to you, only catching snippets here and there: “...didn’t fucking tell you to ruin my shirt…going to show you…disgusting girls like you…”

You felt something being wrapped around your wrists as he manhandled you so that your arms were above your head. He’d bound you up with his tie, you realized, feeling the delicate silk against your aching skin. You opened your eyes as you felt his hands on your ankles, roughly pulling you so that you were lying with your legs spread for him. There was, you observed as your vision refocused, a decent bit of blood on the collar and shoulder of his shirt, a stain that you were positive would never come out. What a shame. Probably a designer shirt, too. Must have been expensive.

You were shocked back into reality by him throwing your legs over his shoulders, bending you in half, once again filling your cunt with a hard thrust. Despite the pain still throbbing behind your eyes, which was slowly receding, you were still so, so desperate for him. You’d been close when he’d stopped, and in your hypersensitive state, you could feel your pleasure building rapidly, and before long you were writhing in his arms.

“Please, don’t stop, please,” you begged, barely even processing the words that were coming out of your own mouth. “I’m so close, I need it, please, please, I need to cum, don’t stop…”

“No,” he snapped, giving you a furious glare. “Didn’t you hear what I said? You don’t get to cum. I wouldn’t have let you cum even before you bit me like a rabid animal. What makes you think you deserve it now?” His last word broke off with an involuntary groan, his pace growing erratic in a way that told you he was close to a second orgasm. He inhaled sharply, collecting himself before doubling down. “Don’t cum. No matter how close you get, hold it. Do you hear me? Do. Not. Cum.”

Despite his orders, you felt your muscles begin to tighten, your pleasure mounting in a way that normally would have sent you over the edge, but nothing happened. You physically couldn’t cum. The feeling just kept building and building, far past what you thought was your breaking point, never stopping, overwhelming you to near-madness and never giving you a moment’s relief, and you bit your lip to stifle a scream.

“Oh, don’t try to act all pitiful now,” he growled, punctuating it with a hard slap to your already oversensitive clit that made you cry out. “You know damn well that you earned this. And if you ever try to bite me like that again, I’ll make this permanent, do you hear me?”

Your eyes flew open, widening in terror. He couldn’t do that. Could he?

The look on his face told you that he absolutely could.

“Oh, it’d wear off eventually,” he purred, leaning in closer as if he were about to kiss you, his fingers just barely teasing your clit, his delicate touch unbearable in your hypersensitive state. “But I could tell you not to cum, over and over and over again, and you’d have no choice not to obey. I could keep you this close for days, weeks, months, maybe years if I wanted to, and drag you around with me like a needy little pet. I could order you to follow me around, to never leave my side. I could put you on a leash. I could parade you naked all over town, let everyone see how badly you want me, even with bruises and cuts all over you.” The thought sent a painful jolt of arousal through you, your legs shaking as you tried desperately to keep yourself from moaning at the idea. He grinned at you, making it very, very clear that you were doing a terrible job at hiding it.

“Oh, of course that turns you on. Fucking depraved, aren’t you? Are you like this for everyone you meet, or do you just want me that badly?”

You couldn’t form a concrete thought, let alone focus hard enough to give him an answer, but you knew his monstrous ego would love it if you could. You just wanted him that badly.

His hand wrapped around your neck, not quite enough to choke you but hard enough so that you felt the marks from when he had. “God, who would have thought that this would be so fun? Beating and fucking a pathetic little thing like you, I barely had to order you to do a thing,” he teased, panting as he fucked you faster. “I’m going to cum inside you, and you’re going to like it. Beg for it. Do it. Now.”

“Please,” You gasped for air, voice coming out as a choked whisper. You were in agony, every inch of your body burning with pain and anticipation and need for an orgasm that kept building and just wouldn’t happen. Burning hot tears were streaming down your face; you couldn’t stop them even if you wanted to. “Please, do it, cum inside me, I don’t care what happens, I need it, just…”

Your pleading broke off into a desperate wail as he brushed a strand of hair out of your face. Even the gentle motion, combined with every other sensation you were feeling, was absolute torture, too much for you to bear. He grinned as you pulled away, trying to escape any more stimulation.

“Oh, god, you look so damned pathetic…oh, god, fine, do it, cum for me, I want to see you break, just do it now--” His voice cracked, his hands desperately clutching at your hair as he came inside you with a desperate moan, feeling you tighten around him, burying his face in the crook of your neck.

Your body went completely rigid at his command and you came hard, the feeling so intense that it felt like your skin was burning all over. You were vaguely aware that you were thanking him, over and over, unable to control the words coming out of your mouth. He silenced you with a forceful kiss, the first one he’d given you all night, and you melted into his touch, thoroughly overwhelmed.

You felt his hips twitch, still riding out the last of his orgasm as you deliriously wrapped yourself around him, clinging on for dear life, moaning with ecstasy.

Finally, he broke away from the kiss, and your body fell limp, overstimulated past your breaking point, so much so that you vaguely wondered how you were still conscious. Your legs dropped from where he had propped them on his shoulders and you lay there, trembling like a leaf, feeling the warmth of his cum inside you.

When you finally collected yourself enough to see straight, you worked your wrists out of the now-loose binding of his tie, then raised your head to look at the man still lying on top of you. His head had dropped onto your chest, his eyes closed. He looked so still and gentle that you wondered if he was asleep.

You reached down, stroking his hair gently with shaking hands, remembering how much he’d liked it before. You wanted to have this little moment of vulnerability with him before he went all cold and ruthless again. He sighed, pressing himself further into your bare chest and wrapping his arms around you. You couldn’t hold back a smile as pride swelled inside you. You felt like you’d tamed some kind of monster, and really, you thought to yourself, you had. You could practically feel the bliss radiating off of him along with the warmth of his skin against yours.

You leaned your head back, staring at the ceiling as you gathered yourself. You were sore all over. Your muscles burned from how tight they’d been for so long, your throat ached when you swallowed, and you still had a pounding headache from the punch to your face and the way he’d choked you. Your body had already begun to bruise, but you couldn’t stop smiling.

“It’s Kilgrave.”

You looked up, vision still slightly clouded with pleasure. “Hmm?” His face was turned away, expression hidden.

“My name. Kilgrave.”

You grinned harder. You’d won.

“It’s pretty,” you giggled, giving his hair a playful ruffle.

He quickly smacked your hand away, sitting up and pulling out of you with a scoff. Ah. There he was.

“Shut up. Don’t even think about it.”

“What?”

“You know what,” he snapped, reaching for his jacket. “Don’t play innocent now, especially not when you look like that.”

You glanced down at your body. He had absolutely wrecked you, but your smile never faded as you looked back at him.

He rolled his eyes, but there was no venom behind it, or at least none that you could detect. “Filthy little thing,” he muttered, re-buttoning his shirt.

You sat up, stretching your sore muscles as he composed himself quickly. You were amazed at how he could go from looking absolutely delirious with pleasure one moment to looking like this the next, all put together and polished as if he hadn’t just fucked you into oblivion.

“And where are you off to?” you said, glancing around the room, trying to find where he had tossed your clothes after you’d taken them off.

“You don’t need to know that.” He walked quickly towards the door, but paused as he realized that you were still looking at him. He sighed with frustration, but still turned around to look back at you.

“I’ll be back next week, if I decide you’re good enough for me to use again. In the meantime, don’t even think about opening your legs for anyone else, do you understand? I don’t want you catching anything and giving it to me.” His tone was bitter, but you could still sense something almost fond behind his words. “Now, once I leave, you’ll wait five minutes, then go out there and put on the best show of your life for all those sad desperate men out there, with my cum dripping down your thighs. Understand?”

Ah, you realized. Not fondness. Possessiveness. Even better. You nodded, barely managing to suppress another proud grin. He gave you what you assumed was supposed to be a contemptful look before turning again to leave, but he might as well have given you a kiss on the forehead with how good it made you feel.

“Bye, Kilgrave,” you called as he left, giving him a playful wave.

He looked back. He didn’t answer, but the facade slipped for just a moment as he blew you a quick kiss, and then he was gone, grinning like a man who had all the power in the world as he closed the door behind him.

A/N: this is the first part of a series! if there's enough interest, i'll post the next parts :) Like, rb, and/or follow if you enjoyed, and thank you so much for reading!

#jessica jones #kilgrave x reader #kilgrave #kilgrave x reader smut #kilgrave smut #smut #minors dni #my fic

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therhythmafterthesummer · 2 years

Text

Runaway Princess (M) ~Bang Chan

Pairing: RoyalKnight!Chan x Princess!Reader Themes: Angst, Smut, Fluff, Strangers to Lovers, AU - Mediaeval Setting Warnings: mentions and depictions of domestic abuse (unrelated to Chan), graphic depictions of intercourse (smut warnings under the cut). hope i didn’t miss anything Word Count: ~16k | AO3 Summary: Your best friend has sent her most trusted knight to help you escape your abusive home, an intriguing man with many facets you can’t wait to uncover.

Author’s Note: this piece started as just the mountain scene… but before i knew i wanted to expand more on it, blacked out, and suddenly it was twice as long. anyway, if you’re reading this, hope you enjoy! know that feedback is always appreciated.

Due to all the abovementioned warnings, this story is intended for an adult audience only. Minors please do not interact.

Smut Warnings: dirty talk? i guess, fingering (F.Rec), handjob, oral (M.Rec, F.Rec only implied), dry humping, nipple play (F.Rec), cumshot, unprotected penetration (there’s an unspoken notion that pulling out prevents pregnancy, this is all purely fictional, please protect yourselves irl!).

Disclaimer: the story represented in this work does not represent Stray Kids in any way; anything described in this story and all actions performed by the characters are purely fictional, this was created just for good fun.

“Who are you?!”

Finding yourself being pulled into a stable at dawn was not something you expected to happen today when you decided to go on a walk, much less finding the person that had pulled you into said stable to be a man you didn’t know.

“I’m sorry for the… Well, the unconventional method to get you to meet me”, the man gave you an apologetic smile, and a short bow of his head. “My name’s Chan, Your Highness. I am a knight of Queen Naeel’s guard. Her Majesty sent me here”.

Your eyes widened at the mention of Naeel’s name, your guard lowering just slightly. Now that the initial fight or flight feeling wore off, you took your time to analyse the man in front of you. Chan was… A handsome young man. He was certainly built like a knight as far as you could tell, very broad, his stance ready for any sudden movement you could make.

You scanned his face for a moment, trying to find any semblance of a lie in his expression. A mess of brown curls on his head, warm brown eyes, a big nose, plump lips, and a scar going from his right eyebrow to the middle of his cheek were all the details you could focus on, his attire that of someone who had indeed prepared for a handful of months travelling from one realm to the other. Interesting… Definitely a handsome young man, but no semblance of lies just yet.

“How do I know you’re telling the truth?”

“I have this as proof”, Chan reached for his pocket, taking out what looked to be a piece of cord and handing it over to you. “Her Majesty said that would be enough…” He sounded sceptical, and you couldn’t blame him. The thing was composed of several different colours of ribbons tied together, the fabric worn down and the colours washed out from years and years of use, a single star charm tied to the middle. You knew he was telling the truth as soon as you saw it, since you kept an exact copy but with a sun charm around your ankle.

Queen Naeel and you had been friends for years. When you met, you were both tiny little princesses, your parents had taken you both to a grand ball in the realm that separated yours, a friendship that bloomed through correspondence and even more meet-ups as you grew up. You had not known platonic love until you got close to her, and to this day she was probably one of the few reasons why you were still breathing in the first place.

“Why… Why are you here?” You eyed Chan carefully, your fist closing over the friendship anklet, shaking slightly in your tight hold.

“Her Majesty said–and please forgive me, Your Highness, these were her exact words–that she couldn’t let you continue living with your bitch-ass father”, Chan grimaced slightly, and you couldn’t help but chuckle–yeah, that definitely sounded like her. “She read your last letter and got worried, so she sent me to help you escape”.

You father… He was the king of your realm, a powerful man who had only ever known greed and lust. He resented your existence, it was something he never let you forget, he would remind you at any chance he got how your birth brought the death of ‘the only woman he had ever loved’–something you doubted was true, as that man had proven time and time again that he was incapable of feeling any form of love.

As you grew up, your father kept showing more and more distaste towards you. You were just like any other girl, rowdy, adventurous, with a thirst for knowledge that could hardly be quenched by the numerous volumes in the royal library. ‘You should be focusing on embroidery and all those things princesses do, not on riding those damn horses and getting all dirty in the royal gardens’ the worst part was that you did like those things, too. You loved embroidery and needlework, and you doubted other princesses didn’t enjoy riding horses or climbing trees, there was no way you were any different from any other girl out there.

Your suspicions were confirmed the first time you finally met other princesses, the exposure to other girls your age finally cementing in you the fact that your father simply hated you. It didn’t matter what you said or did, he would hate you regardless, so you stopped fighting him altogether, opting to keep your mouth shut when he spit his hateful words at you–it was a lost fight before it even started, after all.

By the time you were fifteen he had already remarried, his new wife birthing a son shortly after, finally displacing you from the picture completely. ‘Who wants a rude, daft princess when I finally have a prince of my own?’ you heard him tell one of his advisors once, you wouldn’t lie, the words stung, they hurt, and you spent days holed up in your room crying–not like anyone cared much about it anyway, if anything, only your maids showed concern when you eventually had stopped eating. Your father, his council members, your step-mother, none of them really cared about you.

A sigh passed your lips as you looked at the anklet in your hand. “Do you even have a plan, or did my dear friend send you here on a whim?” Your friend could be very… Spontaneous, to put it simply. Some would even say she was a bit eccentric, but regardless of her odd ways, she had a strong sense of morality. If she believed something was wrong she would act immediately, ‘let’s just do it! We can always figure out the details later!’ She would often say, which, judging by the sheepish smile on Chan’s lips, was probably exactly what she had told him before sending him here.

“I’ve been trying to come up with something, but… It’s my first time in your kingdom, to be honest, so I don’t know my way around that well”, Chan simply shrugged. “Based on what Her Majesty has told me about you, though, I was hoping we could figure something out together, Your Highness”.

You figured it wouldn’t be hard to leave, considering your presence was hardly ever noticed in the castle anyway. So, after informing Chan of an inn he could stay at for the next few days, you two began to plot your escape. You would have to travel for months, so your baggage had to be kept at a minimum, clothes only as necessary, money, a few toiletries you refused to let go of, and the odd knick-knack with sentimental value were the only things you thought you might need. Chan seemed to agree with you, but he stressed the importance of the right clothes to take with you, no dresses or gowns, only garments that wouldn’t obstruct your mobility, and thick coats were a must since you were going to cross snowy mountains.

Throughout the next handful of days you set on the task to gather your supplies as inconspicuously as you could, getting them out of the castle in small batches to not attract suspicions. The thick coats were the first ones to go since they were the heaviest, you brought them to the inn Chan was staying at for safe keeping, and the rest soon followed, until five days later you were able to bundle everything neatly so you could strategically place it on your horse after–a suggestion Chan gave you alleging that ‘it’ll be easier for her if you distribute the weight’, which made sense to you.

On your last day in your father’s castle, you gathered as many jewels as you could, as well as any gold and silver coins you had stashed away for safe-keeping throughout the years. Deep down, you had always had the idea of escaping, so you had saved up, even if you hardly ever entertained the idea. You never had the guts to go through with it because you knew you wouldn’t have been able to make it on your own. Now, though, your best friend and her trusted knight had given you the support you needed, so you took it, finally releasing yourself from your father’s abusive grasp.

You wouldn’t lie, your first week was hard. You hadn’t realised how privileged you were. Sure, you had been emotionally and physically abused for years, but you’d always had food and shelter and comfort… The first night you had to camp out you could hardly get any sleep, the floor was uneven, and the noises of the night scared you. ‘Don’t worry, princess… I got you. I won’t let anything happen to you’ Chan had gently offered when he saw your panicked expression after a particularly loud noise. And, in a way, that did comfort you a bit.

Chan… Chan was gentle, he was proper, and so well mannered… At least, he was when he talked to you. As the days went by, you’d catch glimpses of his other facets, particularly when he thought you weren’t close enough to hear, and it intrigued you. When you two went to any tavern to get some sustenance, and you’d separate from him for one reason or another, you could hear him talk with the attendant, or with another customer, and it was as if he was a completely different person–or rather, a different version of himself. Looser, cheekier, and with a mouth that would put any sailor to shame–all that gone and replaced with his stoic, responsible, and sensible side as soon as you came close and he noticed your presence. It was fascinating, really. And you would lie if you said your curiosity hadn’t been piqued.

You started to notice Chan loosen up around two weeks into your journey. His stance around you relaxed, he’d joke more, tease more, and it gave you a very diluted taste of that Chan you had secretly seen–and heard–talking with anyone other than you. You tried your best to make him feel comfortable around you, but you also tried your best to press his buttons, to get him to react to you, to annoy him a bit.

You quickly found out that Chan liked to lead, to be in control, and oftentimes–in situations that weren’t that serious–you enjoyed defying him, you enjoyed seeing the way his jaw clenched and his gaze shifted, almost, almost as if he wanted to put you in your place, but as soon as you saw that shift in him, you relented, hearing the shaky intake of breath and seeing the whiplash of his own emotions reflected in his eyes.

“How far are we?” You asked out of curiosity as you absentmindedly pushed the bright embers with a stick.

“I’d say… We probably have a bit more than a month and a half to go, Your Highness”, Chan simply looked at the bonfire, at how you pushed the burning pieces around. “Why? Are you not enjoying the super comfortable soil at night, princess?” There was a glint of a teasing tone in his voice, that bit of sarcasm that intrigued you, that piqued your interest, and it made you snort, such an un-princess-like reaction that you knew your father would’ve punished you for as soon as he heard it.

“I’ll take the forest’s soil every night if it means being away from that goddamned castle”, you commented, taking the stick out of the fire and waving it in the air to put out the small flame that had clung to it. “Oddly enough, sleeping on the ground feels more comfortable than being trapped within those walls”.

You could feel Chan’s eyes burning on your side profile, almost as if he was pondering while he scrutinised your face. There was usually distance between you and Chan, both physically and metaphorically, but tonight, as you sat thigh against thigh by the bonfire trying to keep yourselves warm, you could almost, almost feel how those reservations of his were diminishing slowly, but steadily.

“Your Highness, if I may… Why did Her Majesty send me to get you? What was happening in there with your father?” Chan surprised you when he asked such a personal question, and it was almost as if he could infer what happened, but he wanted to be certain of it, why he wanted to know, though, you weren’t sure. “You know how Queen Naeel can be, she didn’t give me any details other than what I told you when we met…”

Your eyes were fixed on the dancing flames in front of you as you took in a deep breath. “My father… My father is a man that doesn’t know love. He claims he does, but he doesn’t. He blames me for my mother’s death, says that, had I not been growing in her, she wouldn’t have died trying to bring me into this world. Stupid, isn’t it? Blame me, who didn’t ask to be brought here in the first place, while he himself put me in there. He’s just mad she died not giving him a son”.

It was as if a dam broke, words falling out of your mouth endlessly with no way to stop them. You told him everything that had happened to you–maybe in too much detail, you’d admit. You told him how your father treated you–or rather, mistreated you–how you were ignored, treated as a lesser being in your own home, how you couldn’t simply be you, you couldn’t exist. Food was kept from you when you spoke out of line, you were confined to your chambers when you didn’t behave as you were expected to, those workers that came too close to you would be discharged as soon as your father found out, and whenever you did anything your father deemed unworthy, not princess-like, not to his standards, he’d hit you. With a stick, with an iron rod, with his hands, with whatever he could reach at the time.

Chan listened intently to every single word that left your mouth, and you hadn’t even realised you were crying until you felt his hand holding yours, the soft caress of his thumb on your knuckles easing the trembles you didn’t even know were coursing through you.

“I’m… I’m sorry, princess”, was all he said as he held your hand.

“There’s no need for that”, you hiccuped as you used your sleeve to wipe some of the tears on your face. “The only one that should be sorry is him… And even then, I’m not sure I would ever be able to forgive him”.

“You don’t really have to, princess”, Chan offered, his tone gentle. “There are things in this world that can’t be forgiven. The notion that we must forgive to heal our wounds is… Is not for everyone. Not in my opinion, at least”.

“I think that’s a fair opinion to have”, you moved your gaze from where it was fixed on your joined hands so you could look him in the eyes. Chan was already looking at you, the light of the bonfire had his brown eyes almost sparkling, and you couldn’t help but feel your breath catching in your throat under his heavy gaze. Using every bit of royal tricks you had, you put up your walls, trying to appear more collected than you were when you finally spoke again. “Have you done it before?”

Chan blinked slightly, almost as if your question had startled him. “Done what, Your Highness?”

“Heal without forgiving”, your eyes jumped around his face, taking in his features, his lips, his nose, his eyes, his scar… Had he been sitting this close the entire time? You could practically count every individual eyelash, and if you were completely honest with yourself, it was quickening your heartbeat more than you would like to admit.

“I have”, Chan replied simply, his eyes seemed to be also taking in your features for a moment, until he finally let go of your hand, bringing it instead to his face, pointing to his scar. “Both physically and emotionally”.

You wanted to inquire more, to learn the story behind the scar on his face, but before you could, Chan stood up from the ground, huffing an ‘anyway, you should sleep, Your Highness’, effectively ending the conversation.

Something shifted between you two that night. You had expected Chan to treat you differently, perhaps trying to act sympathetic around you, or trying to act as if he were walking on eggshells when he talked to you after you told him what had happened to you, what had been done to you. Instead, he just opened up more, showing you more of that other side of him–not fully, but just… More. And it dawned on you then that at that moment, Chan started to see you, to really see you. As a person, as a woman, not some entity, some mindless princess living the perfect royal life. He’d joke even more, tease you even more, and he’d play along when you defied him, and it was fun.

‘Be careful, princess’, he’d tell you when you got a bit too close to the edge, when you had pressed his buttons a bit too much. ‘Or what? What are you going to do about it?’ you’d taunt him, and sometimes, you’d catch his eyes moving around your face, resting on your lips for a fraction of a second, before they snapped back up and simply diverted the conversation. ‘I might have to leave you right here on your own, Your Highness’, he’d tell you with a teasing smile on his lips. You knew it was all talk, so you would always scoff at the comment.

It was odd, really, considering you hadn’t known each other for long. But Chan truly made you feel safe, made you feel comfortable, and in a way, you hoped he felt that way around you, too, all things considered. Somehow, it was as if there was something lingering between you two, when you talked, when you stood close, you felt almost as if there were sparks flying around, a tension that would build the longer you spent time together, a tension that was not uncomfortable by any means, it was just… There, as if you both were just holding your breath, expectant, and it truly, truly intrigued you.

“We’re going further up the mountains tomorrow, princess”, Chan commented as you two sat on the stools of the inn’s tavern, watching as the attendant took the empty plates in front of you. “I heard from a lad just a while ago that it’s snowing heavily…”

Your eyes lit up, your whole body perking up as you snapped your head in his direction, looking at him. “Really?”

Chan blinked slightly, confused. “Yes? That’s not… It’s not something good for us, Your Highness”, he finished off with a laugh, taking another sip of his drink.

“Oh, it isn’t?” Your shoulders slumped slightly, feeling bummed out now. “I’ve just never seen snow before”.

Chan looked slightly surprised. “Never ever?”

“Never. It doesn’t snow where I’m from”.

Chan just hummed, thoughtful. “Guess we might need to get a few more supplies, princess”.

You rolled your eyes in annoyance, not because of the comment itself but because Chan kept on calling you ‘princess’ or ‘Your Highness’, and now, it was really starting to annoy you. “It’s been over a month already, Chan. Stop referring to me by title…”

Chan simply chuckled, taking a long sip of his ale and licking his lips clean right after. “You are a princess, Your Highness. I must address you as such. I’m only a Knight, after all”.

You hated the way he said that, as if he thought of himself as being below you–although you did want him below you sometimes, just in a more improper way. “I’m asking you not to, though. Isn’t that enough for you?”

Chan looked at you for a moment, then back to his drink. “This feels like a trap question…”

“Come on, if our roles were reversed, would you want me to continue calling you prince? Your Highness? Or would you want me to be comfortable around you? To be myself?” The question was pointed, and when Chan stared into your eyes right as you asked it, you could see something in them, an emotion you couldn’t quite decipher.

“Princess…” It was his warning tone, the tone that he started to use when you were almost pressing his buttons too much. “I am myself around you”.

You scoffed. “Please, not even you believe that”, you couldn’t help the sarcastic laugh at that, taking a sip of your drink.

“I am! At least, a more… Proper version of myself, I guess”, he admitted. “The me who’s a knight. A knight of Queen Naeel’s Guard, and as such, I must address royalty appropriately. Come on, let’s go buy a few blankets, princess”, Chan added as he stood up from his seat, gulping the rest of his drink in one go.

You hated that he continuously put that space between you two, because you didn’t want it there, because, by the time you had finally made it to the snowy mountains, you were burning up from the inside out, and you wanted nothing more than for him to let go of those inhibitions.

“It’s cold”, you dumbly commented as you both seeked shelter in the mountains, the snow under your horses’ hooves crunching with every step they took.

You weren’t that used to such low temperatures. not because you had any particular heating system in your father’s castle, but because your realm was of a much warmer climate all year round, so much so it was considered as if there were only two seasons there, rainy and drought, with constant warm temperatures.

“You don’t say, princess” Chan snorted, pulling on the bridle gently to stop his horse. “I think this place will do. The horses need to rest and it’s getting dark”.

It was an almost cave on the side of the mountain, big enough to fit you two and your two horses with some room to spare. It wasn’t completely closed off so it wouldn’t provide as much insulation as you would’ve liked, but you had to make do.

Chan looked for a place to tie the equines securely so they wouldn’t run away during the night, all while you set camp. You’d learn how to actually do these things on this journey, a skill that you were now grateful to have. Had you made your escape without Chan, you would’ve surely died the first night out there, unable to set a safe space for yourself. You could still remember the first time you tried to start a fire with the two pieces of flint, you had given up after the twentieth time, and Chan had offered you an encouraging ‘it’s all about practice, princess. You’ll get there eventually’. And you got there, the fire in front of you starting with a single flick of the two stones together proof of that.

“We’re only two weeks away from Queen Naeel’s realm”, Chan commented once you had had supper, extending his hands towards the bonfire. “It’ll be much easier to move once we’re there, probably three weeks in total for us to reach the castle”.

You simply hummed in response, scooting closer to the fire. “I can’t wait to see her, I really, really miss her”.

“You two are really good friends, aren’t you? For Her Majesty to do something like this…”

“We are”, you could feel your teeth starting to chatter slightly, so you tried to wrap the blanket you had brought with you tighter around your body. “I love her deeply. And after this, I don’t think I’d ever be able to repay her”.

Chan chuckled softly. “Her Majesty wouldn’t expect you to repay her, Your Highness. But if you’re close, I’m sure you know”.

“Oh, I know”, you tried to get as close to the fire as you could, taking special care to not get your blanket on fire. “But still. I won’t be able to repay her, nor you. I’m really grateful”.

“I mean, it was a royal order, so it’s not like I’m making art for art’s sake, princess”, Chan snorted. “But I must say, it isn’t as difficult as I thought it was going to be”.

“Oh? Why? Did you expect a bratty little princess high on her horse? Or did you expect for the journey to be riddled with traps and schemes like in the classic novels they teach at school?”

You heard Chan mumble something, it was hard to hear but you could’ve sworn he had said something along the lines of ‘…a bit of a brat’ but before you could question it he was shaking his head slightly and speaking again. “Honestly, I’m not exactly sure what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn’t this, Your Highness. You’ve made it really easy. You’re fun to talk with, even though you’re a princess and I’m a simple knight, you treat me with real respect when we’re not joking around. I’ve had fun all throughout and, in a way, I’m grateful”.

Oh? So he did enjoy when you pressed his buttons, interesting… You blinked slightly, at his words, a little shocked. After a few seconds, you scoffed, a smile settling on your lips. “How silly. I am the one who’s grateful here”.

“It’s not a competition, princess”, Chan chuckled, standing up from where he was sitting by the bonfire to lay on the blanket you had laid for him on the floor. “You should get some sleep”.

You simply hummed in acknowledgement, but you didn’t move. Truth was, you were freezing. You had also laid a blanket on the floor for you to lay on, but you figured that if you were freezing sitting right here by the fire, you’d die if you laid down on the blanket. So you sat there, as close as you could to the fire, wrapping the blanket over your body as tight as you could.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed–fifteen, twenty minutes?– but you figured Chan was fast asleep already, since he was completely silent. You sat there, debating whether you should go to your other blanket on the floor, maybe pick it up and throw it over your body as well and sit here to try and get some heat from the bonfire. But you couldn’t move, you were just too cold and moving from this spot sounded like the worst idea ever.

Suddenly, you felt hands on your body, holding your upper arms over the blanket you had around your form. You tensed slightly at the unexpected contact, turning your face to find a concerned looking Chan staring at you. “You’re shivering, princess”.

“I’m–I’m really cold”, your whole face felt as if it was about to fall off, and it was truly not pleasant at all.

Chan moved away from you, picking up the blanket on the floor and wrapping it around you. It helped a bit… Emphasis on a bit, as you could still feel your teeth chattering slightly. He noticed, so he moved away again, grabbing his own blanket.

“Don’t you–Don’t you dare”, was all you could muster, seeing as Chan stopped in his tracks with his blanket still in his hand. “You’ll freeze”.

“You clearly need it more than I do, Your Highness. I’m used to this climate, you’re clearly not”, he attempted to wrap his blanket around your form, but you stopped him, a rush of coldness reaching you as your arms left the safety of your cocoon. “Your Highness–”

“Let’s just… Let’s just share, then”, you weren’t thinking much when you said it, you just desperately wanted some warmth, you didn’t think you could withstand this for much longer.

Chan looked apprehensive for a moment, until he finally nodded, guiding you from where you sat by the fire to the blanket he had been laying on previously. As soon as you laid down, he threw all remaining three blankets over your body, finally tucking himself in as well after you gave him a disapproving look when he looked like he was thinking of not doing it.

Soon enough, with the amount of blankets on top of you, and another human body next to you, you started to warm up. Chan wasn’t really that close to you, there was a fair distance, but the blankets provided enough insulation for his body heat to spread over to you, which you couldn’t help but let out a sigh of relief about.

“Better?” Chan asked after a while as he was laying on his left side, turned to you.

“Much”, you were still cold, but not freezing cold, so it was a start. You would surely warm up completely eventually. “Thank you”.

“You’re welcome. Now, sleep”.

You laid there for a while, waiting to warm up further so you could comfortably fall asleep, hearing how Chan’s breathing evened out. Every time you had to sleep in a new setting, it took you a long time to get to sleep, be it for the hard terrain, the changes in temperature, or the noises around you, it always took you a long time, which translated into you tossing and turning more than you probably should with another person sleeping next to you.

At first you laid on your back, then you moved towards Chan, but you couldn’t help your eyes from staying open and focusing on his handsome face, so you laid on your back again, only to turn away from him and lay on your left side. You repeated the motions a few times, your coat coming undone in the process, opening and leaving your front exposed-save for the shirt below it, of course. Thankfully the heap of blankets provided enough warmth that you didn’t really need to close it again.

As you continued to sporadically toss and turn, you couldn’t help but come to the realisation that you were literally sharing your sleeping space with Chan. Somehow, that realisation made you warm up quicker, made you even more restless, which honestly was not what you needed right now. What if you inadvertently pressed yourself to him while you slept? Sure, you were attracted to him but you didn’t want to make him uncomfortable, much less if you didn’t know how he felt about the entire thing. He was still, after all, putting that space between you two.

You continued your almost struggle with yourself, with finding a comfortable position to sleep, until Chan suddenly moved, his arm wrapping around you and his hand holding onto your ribs, effectively stopping your movement. An annoyed huff passed his lips, the heat of his palm just shy away from your breast kick-starting your heartbeat. “Stop moving so much, princess. I’m trying to sleep”, the low tone of his voice so close to your ear sent a shiver down your spine, you just couldn’t help it, and you had to shut your eyes tightly, swearing at yourself for getting yourself in this situation.

Your senses were on high alert, suddenly aware of the lack of space between your bodies, Chan was not fully pressed to you, but one push and he could be… He could very well be flush to your back, the thought now worming into your brain, playing on a maddening loop and why wouldn’t he just move his hand a bit further up…?

“I’m trying to get comfortable”, could he feel your racing heart against his palm as he held you? There was no way he couldn’t, but you were still proud of the evenness in your voice, as if you were not burning from the inside out from your sinful thoughts and the mere feel of his hand on you.

“We’re laying on the ground under a dent on the side of a mountain, Your Highness. Sorry to say, but I don’t think you’ll find any comfort tonight”, Chan let out an amused chuckle, his words coming out as barely a whisper.

“I’m missing the inn we stayed at last night…” You commented absentmindedly. Your mind was too focused on Chan’s hand on your ribs, his hold firm, but gentle, succeeding at keeping you from shuffling too much and Gods why wouldn’t he just move it up?

“Almost two months of travelling and you’ve already let your standards dip this low, huh princess?” Chan shuffled a bit, getting more comfortable, you presume. Was he closer now? You couldn’t tell. There was still a fair bit of space between your bodies, space that the more you felt his warm palm on you the more you wished it didn’t exist.

“Beggars can’t be choosers, isn’t that what they say?” What if you pushed yourself to him? Would he like that? Or would you overstep some boundary if you did? Chan was unmarried, you knew that much, and sometimes you saw the way his eyes looked at you, the way they settled on your lips longer than what was conventionally appropriate, the way he leaned forward just a bit only to step back and smile at you, the way his hands would linger on your skin whenever he had to touch you… Or had you imagined it? “That’s what’s brought us here, cuddled up under these blankets, barely even sheltered by the mountainside”.

“This can hardly be considered cuddling, Your Highness”, there was a glint of amusement in Chan’s words, you could almost hear the smile on his lips as he said it.

Chan’s hand started to move, painfully slow, retreating carefully from your frame so it could go back to lay wherever he had been keeping it before placing it on your body. You couldn’t let that happen, not now that you knew how having the weight of his hold on you felt like. Maybe the cold had effectively killed every single one of your brain cells, all reason slipping from you as your hand shot to his quickly before he got to remove it from you completely, tugging on it–the sudden movement catching Chan off guard, making his chest press against your upper back with the motions.

You heard it.

You heard the way his breath caught in his throat at the contact, and the sound fuelled your impulsive actions, so you placed his hand right back where it was on your ribs, if only a bit further up, almost, almost touching the underside of your breast. “We need to fix that then”, cuddling wasn’t exactly what you had in mind right now, but it was a start.

Chan didn’t move away, he didn’t talk, you doubt he was barely even breathing, at least for a moment. There was silence for a bit, until you heard the shaky inhale, feeling the exhale against your nape right after. “Princess… What are you doing?” His tone was tentative, checking the waters for what might be appropriate to say or not, just like he often did.

“I’m not doing anything”, you couldn’t help the smile that crept onto your lips as you lied through your teeth.

“Bullshit”, you’d truly only ever heard Chan swear when he thought you weren’t close by to hear, and even then he was usually so far away it barely even felt like it was him talking. Now, you had finally heard it clear as day against your ear, and it shouldn’t have affected you, but it did–your thighs pressing a bit closer together to ease a bit of that ache that was steadily building between your legs.

Chan didn’t make any attempts to move, not closer nor away from you. You could feel his chest rise and fall against your back in short spurts, and you knew you had caught his attention with your stunt. Maybe the cold had truly killed your reason. “What if I am doing something, though?” Your voice was barely a whisper, but you could hear a pin drop in the silence that surrounded you, so you knew he was listening.

You heard–and felt–his deep intake of breath, the thumb of the hand you kept pressed to your ribs moving ever so slightly, back and forth, back and forth, slowly, each stroke almost touching the underside of your breast. “I shouldn’t…”

“You don’t sound too convinced”.

“I’m not”, he admitted immediately, almost as if the words had escaped from a place deep within him where they had been contained. “You… You’re a princess, Your Highness”.

“And? I told you my story, my title has brought nothing but despair and desolation to my life. Besides, I’m running away from my land, I wouldn’t be surprised if the King has revoked it already”.

Silence fell between you two, but your positions didn’t change, nor did the movement of Chan’s thumb on you stop. The more the silence stretched out, the more unsure you started to feel, insecurity creeping into every secluded area of your mind.

“Unless you… Unless I’m making you uncomfortable. You can say that, too, if that’s what this is, and I’ll stop”.

Chan chuckled softly behind you, the sound almost incredulous. “I must be a better actor than I thought if you think you are making me uncomfortable”, he went silent for a bit, until his upper body shuffled a bit closer to you, fully pressing his chest to your back as his lips came close to your ear. “The only uncomfortable thing right now, princess, is my traitorous cock straining my pants”.

Your breath hitched in your throat, your thighs further pressing together, an involuntary reaction upon Chan’s confession. Encouraged by his words, you held his hand tighter, dragging it further up so he could finally cup your breast, a shaky exhale passing your lips as his hand groped you as soon as you had placed it there.

“Fuck…” Chan’s lips attached to your neck, leaving kisses and licks wherever he could while his hands grew bolder, dragging to your other breast to provide it with as much attention as the other, gently teasing your nipples over your shirt. “Is this why you were tossing and turning so much? Because you were thinking of me touching you like this?”

“I was–Was truly trying to get comfortable…” Any time his lips pressed on your skin, you felt a jolt of excitement spark from the spot and shoot straight down to your core, your clenching thighs doing absolutely nothing to ease the ache that continued to build between your legs. You needed him. You needed Chan to touch you without barriers, you needed to feel as much of his skin on you as you could. “Chan…”

“Fuck”, his hand shot down from your breast to cup you over your trousers, pulling you to him so your rear was flush to his crotch. You couldn’t help the whine that escaped you as you felt him, hard and warm, grinding slowly against you, with his hand still on your mound. “If you keep making those sounds, if you keep saying my name like that… I’ll do something you might regret in the morning”.

You pushed further into him, your bum dragging over his crotch, making him swear under his breath. “Do it”.

His hand moved, slipping past the waistband of your trousers, under your underwear for his fingers to find your slit. “Shit, so wet and I’ve barely even touched you, princess”, coating his fingers in your essence he brought them up to your clit, rubbing teasing circles on your skin, moans catching in your throat as you bit your lower lip to dampen the sounds.

“Chan… A bit–bit softer”.

Chan’s fingers complied, adjusting the pressure of his slow movements on you. “Mmm, like this?”

“Go up a bi–Oh, shit…”

A soft chuckle passed Chan’s lips, raising goosebumps on your nape as he mumbled against your skin. “Swearing, princess? Such a dirty mouth… I wonder what else it can do”.

“You…” Swallowing thickly, you gathered your thoughts, the slow, almost teasing movement of his fingers on your clit making your head spin. “You’d be surprised”

“I’m sure”, his pace picked up, your legs parting enough to give him more space to manoeuvre, holding onto his forearm for dear life as your breathing became more and more laboured. “I’ve been… Been thinking of doing this, princess. Of touching you, kissing you… I know I shouldn’t have, but I was”.

“Been… Been thinking about you, too…” You could feel heat spread on your face the more he worked you up, his lips on your skin aiding the movement of his fingers on building and building and building your impending orgasm. The slow grind of his hips against your rear was maddening, the feel of his hard length on your bum suddenly making you feel empty, the need to have him in you growing exponentially with each swipe of his fingers on your clit.

“Spread your legs further, lay it over my thigh”.

You did as asked, right as Chan pushed his knee between your legs for you to move them further apart and give him more space for his fingers to dip from your clit to your entrance, his ring and middle finger entering you with ease, a shameless moan escaping your mouth at the sudden feeling of fullness. You were sure it wouldn’t be as fulfilling as his cock, but it would do for now.

“Guide me, princess”, Chan whispered against your ear, his tone confident, but slightly urgent, his lips brushing your skin with every syllable. “Tell me how you like to be touched here”.

“Bit more towards the entrance… More… Harder…”

Chan adjusted his fingers to follow your direction, prodding your walls until he finally found the spot you were guiding him to. Your sigh of relief did not go unnoticed, an amused chuckle falling from Chan’s lips as the movement of his fingers inside of you picked up, his palm lightly stimulating your clit. “You’re fucking dripping all over my fingers… You have really been wanting this, haven’t you? Shit, I bet if it weren’t for these many layers of fabric we could hear the wet sounds as my fingers go in and out of you…”

“Shit…” The faster he moved, the more you cursed, your moans and whines becoming more and more frequent. Desperation started to cling to you, your hips rolling to chase his fingers as well as to rub yourself against his crotch, your walls clenching around him the further that familiar knot in your stomach tightened. You needed your release, and you needed it now. “Chan… I need–Want to…”

“Come on, princess. Give it to me. I got you, remember? I got you. Let me hear you come for me…”

Your vision blurred, the knot in your lower belly unravelling as your climax hit you after a few more flicks of his fingers against your walls, letting warmth spread within your body in its wake. You might have moaned out his name as you did, you couldn’t tell, your senses momentarily shut off, completely overcome by the entire feeling.

Chan removed his fingers from your core, his hand dragging out of your underwear spreading the remnants of your release on your skin as it went, sneaking under your shirt and settling on your lower belly, softly kneading your flesh. “I’m fucking ruined, princess”, his lips pressed kisses on your skin between words, making you flush further. “How can I go back to acting normal around you now that I know you can moan so prettily for me?”

You were still panting, your nerve endings still on fire, but that didn’t stop you from turning around, finally coming face to face with Chan. The full moon and the barely lit bonfire provided enough light for you to make out the features of his face, to see his eyes scanning your face intently. “I’m sure we can figure something out”, taking a hold of the collar of his coat you pulled him to you, crashing your lips with his, a surprised yelp escaping Chan’s throat with the action, surprised as if he had not just had his fingers in your cunt, as if he had not just coaxed a mind-numbing orgasm out of you.

As soon as the initial shock passed, he sprung into action, his tongue making its way into your mouth to hungrily push against yours. His hands found purchase on your bum, eagerly groping you as you palmed his crotch, firmly pressing against his length, the action making Chan bite your lower lip with a grunt and his hips buck forward.

You wasted no time undoing his coat, unbuckling his belt, unbuttoning his trousers, and pulling his zipper down, finally slipping your hand in his underwear to get a feel of him all while you continued to devour his mouth. Chan was warm and heavy in your hand, the sensation making you feel dizzy with all the chaotic thoughts that suddenly started to roam freely in your mind–how he would feel in your mouth, how heavy he would feel on your tongue, how he would stretch your cunt open, how he would fill you up…

“Show me how you like it”, you mumbled against his lips as your fingers wrapped around him, your thumb spreading the fluids spilling from his tip around his head, aiding you to give a couple tentative pumps to his cock.

“Shit… Spit on your hand, princess. Make it feel as if it were your warm, wet cunt on me”.

Chan truly was swearing a lot, you had heard him before, but you weren’t prepared. The contrast of his usual way of addressing you and this had your head spinning. Seeing him and hearing him lose himself enough to let his mouth run freely was immensely gratifying, and you wanted nothing more than to continue to hear him let himself go like this.

So you did as asked, ungracefully spitting on your hand so you could wrap it around him once again. Somewhere in the back of your mind you could remember your father reprimanding you when you were little for spitting– ‘proper ladies do not spit, much less princesses. That’s something only peasants do’. To his standards, proper ladies surely didn’t let knights from other lands finger them on the mountains, yet here you were.

“Tighter”, Chan whispered against your lips, bringing his hand to join yours around his length, helping you tighten your grip around him to his liking. “Fuck, yeah… Just like that”, his hand moved from yours so he could grope your breast instead, while the other pulled the hem of his shirt further up his torso to not get soiled by his fluids. You took advantage of that, placing your free hand on his abdomen to feel his soft skin under your palm, feeling his muscles clenching ever so slightly the more you worked his cock, the more you touched his bare skin.

Removing your hand from his length briefly, you spit on it again to further lubricate him as soon as your hand resumed its motions. His hips bucked, fervently chasing your hand, the movement producing obscene squelching sounds that had Chan grunting against your mouth.

You both had gotten under these blankets however long ago cold as a seal’s bum, it was still snowing out of your makeshift shelter, but the second Chan’s hands had touched your bare body the temperature started to rise. Now, as his hips continued to thrust into your grip and your lips eagerly moved against one another, sweat collected on the back of your neck, the warmth and heat produced by your bodies completely all-consuming.

It was getting harder to breathe, your lips moving from his to attach to his neck instead, pressing kisses there as you tried to get some air into your lungs. “Fuck, you could–you could make me blow like this”, Chan was breathless, his chest heaving the faster you moved your hand around his length, focusing now all your attention on his tip.

“That’s the plan”, Chan had wanted to hear you come earlier, and now you wanted to hear him come for you, too.

Groans and grunts fell from his mouth, albeit slightly muffled as Chan bit his lower lip to dampen the sound. As you continued to lick and kiss his neck you could hear him mumble, something akin to ‘fucking ruined…’ while his hips started to move faster, fucking your hand to chase his own release.

Chan tilted his body slightly, a warning passing his lips as he held his shirt higher and as he tried to create some space between you two and the blankets over you. With a few more pumps of your hand he finally came undone, his release spilling from his tip and landing all over his abs as a drawn out groan fell from his mouth.

“Shit, what a mess…”

“I got you”, you reached your free hand out of the mess of fabric on top of you towards the bag resting above your heads, blindly rummaging its contents until you found the handkerchief you kept in there.

You did your best to clean him up, using the last bit of dry fabric after to wipe your hand while Chan buttoned up his trousers again. It was really warm under the blanket, but you knew that if you removed yourself any further from here you’d freeze in record time, so you stayed put–Chan clearly having a similar thought.

Silence fell for a while between you two, you could see Chan looking at the ceiling of the cave, a hand in his hair softly massaging his scalp and lightly tugging on the strands between his fingers as he seemed to mull something over. The fact that he seemed to be making a conscious effort to not look at you made you feel anxious all of a sudden. Was he regretting what just happened? You didn’t regret it one bit, if anything, this felt like just an appetiser, something to mildly ease your hunger until you could finally stuff yourself full.

“Princess…” His voice startled you, but you turned to look at him regardless, finding him already eyeing you, almost tentatively. “I’m gonna… Gonna kiss you now, yeah?”

He sounded… Nervous? Almost as if he thought you wouldn’t let him. You couldn’t help but scoff at the thought. “Kiss me”.

His lips were on yours before you could even finish saying ‘me’, soft, tired pecks against your lips, his arms pulling you further into him for your head to lay on his arm while one of his legs slotted between yours, keeping you close. “I’m truly, truly ruined”, he mumbled against your lips, his hand coming to hold your hip. “Royally fucked…”

“That’d be two of us, then”, you pressed kisses back on his lips as you spoke, your hand coming to play with the hair on the back of his head as his thumb drew patterns on your hip. “Is this now cuddling enough for your standards?”

A soft chuckle fell from Chan’s lips, giving you another kiss as his hold on you tightened. “Now it is. Before it was just me trying not to rub myself on you the second we got under these blankets”.

Chan pulled back slightly, just enough to look you in the eyes. Sneaking his hand from your hip to your bum, he squeezed your buttcheek, the motion making you hike your leg up his torso, pulling him even closer to you. “Still cold?”

You shook your head, and Chan simply leaned in, pressing a kiss to your lips briefly, accentuating his next words with a tight squeeze to your bum. “You’re not gonna get rid of me now, princess. As soon as we make it to the next inn and I get you on a bed I’m gonna make you all mine”.

You chuckled softly, leaning in to press a loud kiss to his lips. “I’ll hold you to that”.

As Chan held you, softly caressing your back, your bum, your thigh, and with the aftereffects of your orgasm still pumping through your veins, you finally fell asleep.

The next morning you woke up as soon as the first rays of sunlight touched your closed lids. Once you regained your senses enough you could feel warmth all over you, and you realised then that Chan was clinging to your frame, holding you so tightly in his arms you could hardly breathe. You tried to wake him up, gently caressing his back and softly murmuring his name. Your attempts only made him whine, musing a sleepy ‘five more minutes…’ before he nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck.

All you did was chuckle softly, threading your fingers in his hair to massage his scalp, eliciting a satisfied hum against your neck. Just as you had not been prepared for Chan’s unfiltered swearing, you had also not been prepared for this facet of Chan, the clingy, touchy Chan. Even as you broke camp, he remained as close to you as he could, with his hands on you as much as he could, touching you, hugging you, even kissing you. A completely different demeanour from the one he sported when you had gotten into that almost-cave the night before.

And you retaliated, of course. With your own touches, with your own words, with your own mouth, finally able to physically display your feelings. When Chan bent over to pick up the last bundle of blankets so he could strap it up to his horse, you were presented with an opportunity, something you had wanted to do for so long but you hadn’t dared. Now, though, you could. You could indulge, so you did, reaching to him and pinching one of his buttcheeks. Chan stilled for a moment, but he resumed his movements almost immediately after, regarding you with a smirk as he finished his task.

Just as you were about to hop on your horse, you felt his hand on your rear, gripping the flesh tightly as his free hand cupped your cheek, bringing your mouth to his, stealing the air out of your lungs with his heated kiss. All you could do was whine as you brought your hand to his nape to attempt to pull him impossibly closer to you. It was truly exhilarating, feeling Chan’s warmth all over you as he kissed you, his tongue feeding the fire in the pit of your stomach, and his, too, if the hardness you felt against your belly was anything to go by.

Finally, letting go of your buttock, Chan landed a harsh smack on your rear, making you simultaneously gasp and laugh, completely in disbelief. Chan simply shrugged, alleging ‘you get your fun, so it’s only fair I get mine, too’ before he helped you get on your horse, moving to mount his as soon as you were seated.

Once you both left your former campsite behind, and got back on the trail, you couldn’t help but ask, “so, how long until we reach some civilization?”

“Probably a day, or half a day if there are no eventualities”, Chan offered. “Why, princess? Wanna get fucked that badly?” You could practically hear the smirk on his face as he talked, and you couldn’t help but scoff, incredulous. Oh, how you liked this side of Chan, too…

“Oh, I do want to get fucked”, you heard Chan laugh next to you, seemingly also in disbelief at your honesty. “But, I’m asking because I’m truly curious, besides, I figured since you already had your fingers in my cunt, might as well stop being all mysterious and tell me more about yourself on our way there”.

Chan chuckled, but he humoured you regardless. It wasn’t as if Chan hadn’t told you things about himself before, he had told you enough to intrigue you, to want to inquire more on his life, and you had managed to gather a few things here and there just by looking at him, just by the way he did things, said things, or the way he carried himself. So, as you continued your journey, hearing him tell you about his humble up-bringing, about his family, about his knighthood, steadily satisfied some of that curiosity you had towards him.

You learnt that Chan had two younger siblings, and his parents were still alive. His mother worked as a seamstress, while his dad was also a knight in the Queen’s Guard, ‘it was almost a given that I would take the oath as well and follow my father’s steps. And honestly, so far I haven’t regretted it’, he commented as soon as he mentioned his father’s profession.

You learnt that he lived on his own, and that on his ‘hardly existent time off’ as he put it, he enjoyed hanging out with his small group of friends, playing bocce, or going out to eat, or going out for drinks. “I’d say I’m a very simple man, princess. Boring, even”, he added with a chuckle. “But what about you, though? Other than, you know, the thing with your father… What do you do to keep yourself entertained? You’re adept in embroidery, right?”

You had told Chan in passing once when you were camping in the woods that you liked to embroider to keep your mind off of things, you were honestly surprised he remembered such a mundane detail. “I mean, I’m not sure if adept is the word to use, but yes. I’m fairly into needlework in general…”

You told Chan you enjoyed playing draughts, how you used to play it a lot with the maids that got close enough to you, or even with Queen Naeel when you two would meet. “I’d like to try new things though, things that I wasn’t allowed to do. See if I can find anything that brings me joy, I want to have fun…”

Your conversation flowed like this, smoothly, seamlessly. Slowly but surely peeling layers and layers of yourself and showing them to Chan, just as he did the same. It honestly felt almost the same as before, you had never truly been uncomfortable speaking with Chan, on the contrary, he was quite enjoyable to talk to, but now, with no barriers between you both, it all just felt… Easy, soothing.

By the time night fell you had found yourselves in a small town close to the base of the mountain. An excited ‘holy shit, hot springs!’ leaving Chan’s lips as soon as he spotted the many signs, and you couldn’t help the sigh of relief as he said it, the cold was truly not something you could withstand for much longer, so hot springs sounded like heaven at that moment.

As soon as your horses were secured and sheltered, you made your way to the attached inn, finding the attendant with ease for Chan to confidently ask for one room. Taking both of your belongings, he urged you to go to the hot springs, “you must be freezing. I’ll take these up, and we can meet later for supper once we’ve warmed up, yeah?” An offer you gladly took.

The warm water eased the tremors that had started to course through you when the sun was no longer providing any heat as you travelled. A couple of old ladies engaged in conversation with you while you bathed, their presence was comforting in a way, they were nice and provided you with some company as you scrubbed your body clean. But even if they were nice, you did try your best to keep your body underwater, or to always face in their direction, not wanting to attract too much attention to your back.

When you warmed up enough and felt clean enough, you made your way to the tavern area of the inn, ordering some drinks and securing a table by the corner. Chan joined you shortly after, with a towel still draped over his head and a bright smile on his face making his dimples pop and his eyes almost disappear into crescents, and you simply couldn’t help the flutter in your heart at the sight.

The food was surprisingly decent, better than the last few inns you had stayed at throughout your journey. You heard from the attendant that the place was quite popular among travellers, mostly due to the hot springs, and you could understand that completely. You and Chan took your time eating, and even after your food was finished, you stayed there for a while, a relaxed aura settling between you two as you simply enjoyed each other’s company, drinking, talking, flirting…

However, as soon as you made it to your room, as soon as the door closed behind you two, it was almost comical how fast Chan made his move, pinning you to the closest wall he could find as his lips connected with yours, kissing you with force, with want. Gripping your thigh, he hiked it on his hip as one of his legs slotted between yours, his thigh adding just the tiniest bit of pressure against your heat, making you moan and whine against his mouth.

You liked kissing Chan, you truly did, but right now, as your hips rolled to get some stimulation from his thigh between your legs and both your hands and his held and groped anywhere they could on the other’s body, you just couldn’t wait anymore. So you untangled your legs from his and pushed him towards the bed as you continued to kiss.

With one final push on his shoulders, Chan sank, sitting on the edge of the bed for you to climb on his lap and straddle him, cupping his cheeks to pull his mouth to yours once again almost immediately after. He grunted as soon as you lowered yourself fully on his lap, his hands roaming your body, fondling your hips, your thighs, your back… All as you quickly worked the buttons of his shirt, swiftly unbuttoning each one so you could finally get a full feel of him.

“Don’t be alarmed…” Chan mumbled against your lips as soon as you unbuttoned the last button of his shirt.

You pulled back from his lips and looked him in the eyes. Chan looked almost… Apprehensive as you looked back at him. Slowly, you brought your hands into his open shirt, feeling his abs, his pecks, reaching his shoulders. You could feel his heated skin under your fingertips, every dip, every curve, but most importantly, you could feel every raised bump that seemingly didn’t belong there, and as soon as you slid the shirt off of his shoulders and moved your eyes from his to take in the sight of his bare skin, you understood why he had given you a warning, why he asked you to not be alarmed.

Chan was well built, broad, fair skinned, all defined muscles that flexed and relaxed under your touch, but by far the most distinctive feature of his physique, were the numerous scars littering his body. They were everywhere, on his chest, on his arms, his abs, you wouldn’t be surprised if they covered his back and his legs, too. Chan simply looked back at you, expectant as you took in his form. You’d lie if you say you weren’t surprised by the sight; sure, he had a scar on his face, but that paled in comparison now to the amount of scars on his torso. Deep, superficial, keloids, faint marks, it was all an assortment of different textures and shades of his skin tone and there was no way you could just… Not notice them.

Your hands moved, tentatively, slowly, tracing the many different shapes, feeling each of his intakes of breath with your touch. You didn’t know how long you sat there just touching him, but finally, you settled your palms on his pecks, shamelessly feeling him up as your eyes fixed on your hands and you tilted your head slightly to the side. “Chan, you… You’re really handsome”, you emphasised your words with a squeeze on his pecks, which made him huff an incredulous laugh. “I’m not alarmed”, you turned your gaze back up to meet his, looking him right in the eyes. “I’m just… Curious”.

Chan just hummed, his hands moving from your thighs to hold your hips. “I’ve been in a lot of… Altercations. Some related to my knighthood, some… Not so much”.

“Will you ever tell me the stories?” Removing your hands from his chest, you proceeded to unbutton your own shirt, slowly, leisurely flicking every single button open until you could finally shrug it off of you, leaving your torso completely exposed.

“Only if you have a few hours to spare to listen to them”, Chan took in the sight of your bare chest, you could literally see the moment his eyes zeroed in on your breasts, growing impossibly darker. You’d let him have his fun, but there was something more important you wanted to do, or at least, to show him. So you took his hands from where they were fondling your hips, his hold relenting immediately as you brought them to your lower back, pressing his palms against your skin.

“Feel them”, was all you told him, a look of confusion crossed his face briefly, but his hands moved regardless, slowly moving up the expanse of your back, that look of confusion quickly replaced with that of shock, his eyes going wide and his eyebrows rising high in surprise, only to scrunch with concern right after.

How could you be alarmed about something you yourself carried with you every day of your life, too? Chan’s fingertips traced every single dip, every single bump, every single scar on your back, all as he looked deeply into your eyes, all as you got lost in his eyes as well. “My father was a monster, but he wasn’t stupid. He’d only leave his mark where he knew no one else could see, not unless I let them see them, at least”, you offered, shuddering slightly under Chan’s featherlight touch.

You would usually hide your marks pretty well, always told your lovers you liked the thrill of getting intimate with clothes on, that it added a sense of obscenity to the entire thing. Truth was, you simply didn’t want to deal with the looks they could give you, or to explain anything to anyone, mostly out of fear of what would happen if you spoke up against your father. Chan already knew, though. He knew what you’d been through and he had shown you his own scars, so there was no point in hiding them, no point when you could see in his eyes no semblance of judgement or disgust towards you, if anything, all you could see was fire, burning brighter the longer he looked at you, the longer he explored and touched you.

In his exploration, his hand found the back of your head, pulling down to crash your lips with his. Chan’s kiss was urgent, loaded, all passion and fire overflowing into you with each grunt, each groan. His hands brought you closer, bare chest against bare chest sharing your warmth as your fingers threaded in that mess of brown curls of his, tugging him impossibly closer to you while your tongues pushed against one another. It was both suffocating and freeing, stealing the air out of your lungs while simultaneously filling you with life.

The second your hips started to move, grinding against his hardened length his grip on your body tightened, his hands roughly palming your thighs, your hips, your rear, anywhere he could reach without breaking the contact of your chest against his, almost as if he wished to continue enjoying that feeling of warmth of your bare skin against one another.

You felt yourself moving, Chan’s hands keeping you firmly in place as he stood up and manoeuvred your bodies so you could lay on the bed with him on top of you, right between your legs. Pulling away from your lips, he rested his weight on his hands, looking down at you just as you looked up at him. He took his time, just scanning the features of your face for a while until his eyes moved, taking in the sight of your bare upper torso, his eyes moving almost frantically as if he didn’t know where to look first. And you let him, mostly because you were also doing the same, taking in his breathtaking features, taking in every bump on his skin.

“I haven’t done this in a while”.

Chan surprised you by saying that. He didn’t look particularly ashamed or bashful or anything, he just looked… Serious. And somehow, it made you chuckle. “Could’ve fooled me”.

“Don’t wanna fool you, though”, a smirk crept onto his lips as he lowered himself on his elbows. His lips found yours, one of his arms sneaking under your neck for you to rest on it as his opposite hand found your thigh, pulling you to him so you could hold onto him. Chan rolled his hips, letting you feel him, hard and warm right at the apex of your thighs, making you moan into his mouth.

Suddenly, Chan moved, rolling to the side and moving your body along for you to now straddle his hips, the motion earning a surprised yelp from your lips. His mouth trailed open mouthed kisses from your lips, to your chin, your neck, your collarbones while his hands roamed your back, all as you shuddered under his touch.

“Good…” you gulped the saliva that had collected in your mouth, feeling as Chan’s lips finally found their way to your breasts, kissing everywhere but where you wanted him most. “Chan…” You didn’t mean to sound that needy, that urging, but that was how your call of his name came out, and honestly, you didn’t care if you sounded desperate, because you were.

“Shh, don’t be so impatient, princess. Let me enjoy you for a bit, there’s no need to hurry”, Chan mumbled against your skin as his hands came to cup your breasts, squishing them together to create the perfect space for him to dive his face into with an appreciative hum, his thumbs coming to graze your nipples, his touch so featherlight it was almost as if he was teasing you, giving you a small taste of what you could feel and it was steadily filling you with anticipation.

A shaky gasp escaped your lips as you felt Chan’s lips suck on the tender skin of one of your breasts, leaving a purple mark right as he gently pinched both of your nipples between his fingers. “Is this okay?” his mouth barely even moved away from your skin as he talked, and you nodded, only for Chan to lightly tweak your nipples, the barely there stimulation sending a shiver down your spine. “Words, darling”.

“Yes…” You gulped, looking down at him right in the eyes as you spoke. “It’s–It’s okay”.

Chan simply hummed, satisfied with your answer. So his lips returned to your breasts, sucking purple roses on the delicate skin all as both of his hands worked in unison to tweak and twist and pinch your sensitive buds, the combined stimulation eliciting quiet moans to spill from your lips. You felt yourself heating up further the longer he spent working your chest, touching you, marking you, and it was right as you were close to begging that you finally felt his tongue, landing tentative swipes against one of your nipples for him to finally suck it into his mouth.

“Oh, that’s good…” your finger’s tangled in Chan’s hair, tugging the strands gently. Chan hummed, sneaking his free hand to your rear, holding one of your buttocks tightly as his mouth and his hand continued to work you up. You hadn’t realised you had started to move until you felt him buck up into you, your hips slowly grinding against his, feeling his hardened length against your core, providing you with that relief you’d been desperate for even with the fabric that still separated your flesh.

Chan’s hand on your rear tightened, almost urging you to move faster, to move harder against the outline of his cock, and the moment you felt his teeth graze the sensitive skin of your nipple you couldn’t help but do just that, moaning from all the different sensations that completely clouded your senses. His mouth on you, his hands on you, his hardness under you, all combined sent sparks of pleasure everywhere within you, kindling that fire in the pit of your stomach, burning brighter with each roll of your hips against him.

Once Chan was satisfied with his work on your nipple, his mouth moved to the other, his hands switching positions to continue with the same treatment as before, one holding your other breast, stimulating your nipple and the other gripping your rear as tight as he could. You knew you were too far gone the moment you looked him in the eyes again, seeing his lustful, almost greedy stare looking back at you with his lips attached to your breast, so your hips sped up, chasing that feeling that was building between your legs the more you ground yourself against his hardness, and before you knew it, you were coming, trembling as heat spread within every crevice of your body, as your mind clouded with only bliss and pleasure and Chan.

“Fuck, fuck, wait…” You mumbled, breathless, firmly tugging on Chan’s hair to get him to detach his mouth from your nipple. “Too much, sensitive…”

Chan chuckled softly, moving his mouth to press kisses on your neck as he removed his hand from your breast, too, moving it to join the other to fully cup your rear. “Enjoyed yourself?” His mouth found the skin behind your ear, pressing a kiss there, only to move along and take your earlobe between his teeth, tugging gently, making you swear under your breath with the action. “Couldn’t even wait, huh? Had to use me as your mount to get off?”

You simply shook your head, taking in deep breaths. “Couldn’t wait”, was all you said, completely shameless. “Not when you looked so good with my tits in your mouth”, your lips were on his in an instant, muffling Chan’s groan as you kissed him, relishing the taste of his tongue on yours and the tightening of his hold on your rear, whether the action was due to the motions of your kiss or the impact of your words, you didn’t know.

Resting your weight on your knees and separating your hips from Chan, your hands trailed down his torso until they found the waistband of his trousers. “Off”, you mumbled against Chan’s mouth, giving him enough space to manoeuvre and remove the offending piece of clothing, his underwear coming off with it, leaving him completely bare for your curious eyes to admire.

Just as you imagined, Chan’s legs were also covered in scars, of many different depths and shades, on his thighs, his shins, his calves, they were everywhere. You shuffled lower on Chan’s body, getting comfortable enough for your fingers to delicately trace each bump of raised skin they could, until finally, you moved your attention to his length, hard, pink, and pretty–especially so as precum pooled around the tip where it laid on his abdomen.

Chan was unmoving, propped on his elbows simply looking at you, the expression on his face somehow both lustful and relaxed as he let you explore him as much as you wanted, however you wanted.

“You’re staring”, there was a glint of amusement in Chan’s tone, highlighted by the smirk on his face and it made you look away from his cock to his face again.

Licking your lips, you regarded him with a smirk of your own. “What? Feeling shy?”

“With that look in your eyes? No, just feeling desired”, he said it so naturally, so unabashedly sure of it, you couldn’t help but chuckle.

The moment your fingers wrapped around his length, you could see his chest rise and fall as he took a deep breath. “Remember what you told me back at the campsite?” Your hand moved, slowly dragging up and down his length, focusing on his tip.

“I told you many things at the campsite, princess”, Chan licked his lips, his eyes jumping back and forth from looking at your hand working his cock and your face as you talked to him.

“You told me something… Something that made my mind wander…” Tightening your grip around him, you moved closer to his length, and you could’ve sworn Chan was holding his breath in anticipation. “Wanted to do this so bad, you have no idea”, with that, you replaced your hand with your mouth, finally, finally getting a taste of him.

A shaky breath and a loud ‘fuck!’ fell from Chan’s lips as soon as you took him into your mouth, as soon as he felt your tongue landing firm swipes against his frenulum and your lips dragging over his tip. You took your time, savouring him, building his pleasure as you kept a rhythm, aiding your movements with a hand on what you couldn’t fit in your mouth.

His jaw went slack, quiet groans and curses spilled freely from his mouth as Chan took in the sight of you working him up. One of his hands reached for you, moving your hair out of your face to keep it from obstructing his view, settling to caress your cheek after, his touch almost tender, a complete contrast to your lewd ministrations.

“Fuck, you do have a dirty mouth…”

You simply hummed around his length in response as you continued to move. With a deep breath, you took him further into your mouth, right to the back of your throat, making Chan close his eyes and throw his head back, biting on his bottom lip to muffle his groans.

Wet, gagging sounds filled the room, joining Chan’s constant swearing and groaning and grunting, and the combination of that along with the feel of him in your mouth had your head spinning, had you all worked up and burning up as your inner walls clenched around nothing.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, you’re so good at this”, you felt Chan’s hands on your head, pulling you off of him as he quickly scrambled to get close to your mouth. “You’re too good at this, don’t wanna blow yet”, was all he said as he crashed his mouth on yours, savouring you, devouring you, all while tugging the waistband of your trousers and your underwear for you to finally take them off. Heat spread all over your face, blushing at his words, at his hands on your back, at his hands on your rear, at his tongue in your mouth.

“I want you…” Your back hit the mattress as Chan mumbled his words between kisses. His middle and ring finger found your dripping core, entering you with ease to rub against that exact spot within your walls that drove you up the wall, that exact spot that you yourself had shown him how to find, making you moan against his lips as he continued to ravish your mouth.

“I need you…” His fingers diligently worked you up, loosened you up, preparing you for him, all as your palm found his length, stroking him leisurely and your fingers tangled in his curls, tugging him even closer to you. It wasn’t enough, though. Not enough closeness, not enough fullness.

“Can I have you, princess? Hmm?” Chan pulled away from your lips, enough to look you in the eyes, to take in every single one of your features, your heavy lids, your slightly agape mouth, the way your brows furrowed as his fingers continued to pleasure you, to stretch you open.

“You have me, Chan…”

You missed his fingers within your walls and the weight of his cock in your hand immediately, the feeling soon replaced with anticipation as Chan took a hold of length and dragged his tip along your folds, coating himself in your essence. Chan looked into your eyes, looking for any signs of you wanting to back out, to stop this now. He clearly found none, if anything, all he got was you rolling your hips, enticing him, tempting him. So he moved, finally stuffing you full of him in one swift motion, eliciting a shared sigh of relief as soon as he was buried snugly within your walls.

You pulled him to you, wrapping your limbs around him and connecting your mouths almost desperately. Chan kept himself propped up on one of his forearms, with his hand holding your head in place and the other hand moving below you to find one of your buttocks, holding you tightly as he started to move. Gone was the Chan that wanted to take his time, to take it slow, the Chan that claimed there was no hurry.

His hips collided with yours repeatedly, his pace steady, relentlessly pounding you to the mattress, his cock hitting just the right spot within your walls to get you moaning for him as soon as he started moving. You felt lightheaded, between his thrusts and his mouth on yours you could barely breathe, but it was hard to register it when all you could think about was how good this felt, how right it felt.

Chan’s lips moved away from your mouth, your moans now filling the room as he left wet, open mouthed kisses from your cheek all the way to your neck, whispering against your skin. “So good, fuck… You feel even better around my cock, shit…”

“Chan, please… Need to… Want to…” You could barely talk, but you tried anyway. You wanted your relief, you wanted to feel it while he was inside of you, you wanted him to feel it while he was inside of you.

The hold of your limbs around him relented, letting Chan pull himself away from your space to rest his weight on his heels. His thumb found your clit, the contact immediately sending that jolt of excitement up and down your spine. With one of your legs over his shoulder and you holding onto the other one to keep you spread open for him, he kept ramming into you, stealing the air out of your lungs with each thrust as his thumb rubbed your clit diligently, building your release and getting so, so, so close…

“You have no idea how much I’ve been wanting to see you like this”, Chan’s thumb sped up, looking you in the eyes as he spoke, panting slightly. “So pretty, just taking my cock so well, aren’t you? Is this what you wanted too, hm?” All you could do in response was frantically nod and continue to roll your hips to meet his thrusts. “Look at you, can’t even talk, fuck…”

You simply shook your head, reaching for his hand on your thigh. “Close…”

“Close?” Chan snapped his hips harder, faster, the movement of his thumb on your clit not stopping. “C’mon, princess. I got you…”

When you came, you came hard, a sob of his name falling from your lips as you held onto Chan’s hand on your thigh for dear life, his groan of appreciation almost going unnoticed as your mind went blank. “Fuck, fuck, princess… Such a good cunt… Feel so good around me, tight, warm, shit…”

Throwing your other leg over his shoulder as well, Chan moved impossibly faster, holding onto your hips tightly, chasing his own high. “So close…” His voice was barely a whisper, completely lost in the feeling of it all as he continued to indulge in your body, in the feel of your walls clenching around him, in the way your tits looked when they bounced with every single one of his movements against you.

Pulling out, Chan held his cock in his hand, wrapping his fingers around it and pumping himself to completion right on top of your lower belly with a groan. You couldn’t help but shiver at the feel of his warm seed on your body, a sensation that you immediately knew would plague your wettest dreams, along with the sounds that ran freely from his mouth.

Chan plopped down next to you, panting, breathless. Much like yourself, just trying to catch your breaths. Closing your eyes you set to enjoy the feelings coursing through your body, the ringing in your ears, the aches and the burns and the warmth, all pure bliss and satisfaction.

When you opened your eyes again and turned your head to the side you found Chan already looking at you, and, as if there had been some pulling force between you two, you found each other once again, your mouths sealed in a slow, passionate kiss.

“So much for taking your time…” You teased him as soon as he pulled away from the kiss, making him laugh.

“Couldn’t resist when you looked so good with my cock in your mouth”, Chan reached for his discarded shirt, using it to wipe the remnants of his climax from your body, dumping it on the floor right after.

Once he laid back down, he pulled you to him, holding you close to enjoy the post-coital bliss as one of his legs slotted between yours.

“We have a problem, princess”, Chan mumbled against your hair.

Your hands traced patterns on his back as you cuddled, feeling the scars there, too. Humming in acknowledgement, you urged him to continue, trying your best to act as if those words hadn’t brought the tiniest drop of concern in your mind.

Chan’s arms held you tighter, humming as well until he finally spoke. “Against my better judgement, against all that is proper, I’m utterly smitten by you. How are you gonna take responsibility for that, huh princess?”

Pulling back from Chan’s chest you looked at him, at the teasing smile on his face coupled with the serious glint in his eyes, and you couldn’t help but chuckle, with a genuine smile on your lips. “I guess you’ll have to court me and find out”.

“You’d like that?” There was a tone of hopefulness in his voice, and it made you giddy. “I told you, I’m a boring man, darling. You’d get tired of me”.

“I’d like that very much”, you pressed a kiss to his lips. “Besides, you’ve already marked me, you’ve got to take responsibility for these, too”, you gestured to your chest, to the numerous purple splotches Chan left behind, a sheepish smile appearing on his face as he looked at them.

Cupping your cheek, Chan looked you in the eyes for a bit, taking you in until finally he leaned in and kissed you again.

That night, even though you were both tired from the long journey, you both spent as much of your energy as you could just exploring each other, enjoying each other, until your bodies couldn’t keep up anymore. By the time the moon was at her highest in the sky you and Chan were already spent, so you simply held onto each other as sleep finally claimed you both.

When you woke up the next day, the light coming from the window was enough for you to infer it was close to midday, and slightly alarmed, you tapped on Chan’s arm that rested around your waist. “Chan… Chan… It’s morning already, we overslept”.

Chan simply grumbled, moving his hand to your ribs, right below your breast, tightening his hold on you as he buried his face in your hair and pressed his chest flush to your back. “And? It’s not like we’re camping, doesn’t matter if we sleep in…” He mumbled, clearly only half awake.

You immediately relaxed in his hold, you’d gotten so used to getting moving as soon as your eyes opened that it almost became a part of your routine, but Chan had a point, there was no hurry to move when you were staying at an inn like this. Taking a hold of the hand he had placed on your ribs, you moved it so you could place a kiss on his calloused palm. The action made Chan let out a satisfied sigh, moving as close as he could to you as you clutched his hand to your chest.

“Maybe…” Chan spoke again after a while, mumbling against your shoulder as he started to press kisses on your skin, making goosebumps raise under his touch. “Maybe we could even stay for another day… So we can, you know, recover from the long journey…”

Chan’s hand moved away from where you were holding it against your chest, softly caressing the skin of your abdomen, your belly, your thighs, reaching your bum only for him to squeeze one of your buttocks, making you chuckle. “What do you think, hmm?”

You pressed yourself further into him, feeling him already hard against your rear. “What’s one more day to a two month trip, right?”

“Exactly”.

You moved, and as soon as you were on your back Chan was already on top of you, kissing your neck, your chest, your nipples, your belly… Slowly, leisurely, he left kisses everywhere on your torso as his hands massaged your body, mumbling words of praise against your skin as he went ‘so beautiful, driving me fucking crazy…’ Until he finally found himself between your legs, making you shudder and tremble with his tongue, with his mouth, with his fingers… Certainly one of the best ‘lazy mornings’ you had spent in a long, long time.

You did rest that extra day in the inn, going into the hot springs, eating at the tavern… But admittedly, most of the time you were just in your shared room, all tangled limbs, sharing moans and groans and grunts, sharing your warmth, sharing your stories. And by the time you left the inn, hopped onto your horses, and continued with your journey, you realised that this is what real peace felt like.

After a few weeks, after you saw the first of many banners signalling Queen Naeel’s territory, after many more stays in inns throughout her realm, after many days and nights spent just enjoying Chan’s company, you finally made it to your friend’s home. The second you stepped into her castle you were almost winded by the collision of her body against yours, holding you so tightly against her that you couldn’t help the tears that welled in your eyes.

“You’re here…” Naeel sobbed against your shoulder, only to quickly pull herself away from you to hold you by the shoulders, her eyes frantically scanning the features of your face.

You couldn’t help but giggle, bringing her into a hug again, quiet tears spilling from your eyes as you held her in your arms. “I’m here… All thanks to you, and Chan, of course”.

“Oh, Channie!” Naeel removed herself from your embrace, jumping instead towards Chan who had been standing behind you, looking fondly at the reunion, his expression quickly changing to that of shock as Naeel hugged him tightly, too. “You did well, thank you, thank you”.

“Your… Your Majesty, please”, Chan cleared his throat, awkwardly patting Naeel on the back.

“Ah, right, physical contact, big no, no”, she regarded him with another smile, reaching for your hand to pull you closer to her. “I trust you two had a safe journey?”

“Nothing out of the ordinary, Your Majesty”, you had spent the last few weeks with the unfiltered, carefree Chan, it almost made you laugh to see him back into his Proper Knight mode. “Besides, Her Highness was an excellent companion all throughout”.

“Oh? Was she?” Naeel looked back at you, with a glint of something in her eyes, something insufferable you were surely going to have to deal with as soon as you two were on your own.

Chan just hummed in response, adding a “if that’s all for now, I’ll be taking my leave, Your Majesty. I’m sure you two would like to catch up”.

“Yes, yes. You’re dismissed, Channie. Take a week off, or two, or three, as you see fit, you deserve it”, with a couple of pats on Chan’s shoulders, Naeel pulled herself away from his space, coming instead to your side and slinging an arm over your shoulder, pulling you tight against her side, making you smile.

“Your Majesty”, Chan bowed his head towards Naeel, then turned to you, offering his hand. “Your Highness”, you placed your hand in his, and felt heat creep on your face as he brought it to his face, placing a soft kiss on your knuckles, regarding you with a warm smile and an even warmer look in his eyes. “I’ll see you soon”.

With that, he left, leaving you a blushing mess. A blushing mess as if you had not let him fuck you for days on end.

Naeel quickly took you to the courtyard, her attendants bringing you cakes and biscuits and tea for you to spend the afternoon in a resting area that was clearly just set there for her to relax in. “So, how was the trip?” Bending at the waist, she expertly tied the anklet you had given back to her around her ankle, once again matching with you as you still wore yours religiously.

“Not that bad…” You commented as you chewed the sugary treats. Speaking with your mouth full would’ve surely earned you an angry slap from your father, but he wasn’t here, he was hopefully no longer in your life, so you could be as free as you wanted, knowing that Naeel wouldn’t judge you, if anything, she was just like you. “Compared to, you know, living with my father, it was rather enjoyable I’d say”.

Humming softly, Naeel took a sip of her tea. “And Chan?”

“Chan… Chan’s nice. Really… Really nice”, you took a sip of your tea as well, trying to hide from your friend’s inquiring eyes as she looked at you.

“He is! Just a bit too stoic sometimes”, she chuckled, reaching for a biscuit. “I was hoping he would loosen up a bit with this trip. He’s one of my best knights, but he needs to relax, to detach from work a bit. I hope he managed to distract himself”.

Your mind quickly filled with memories of the nights you and Chan shared, in the mountains, in the inns, in your campsites… You could almost feel the phantom of his touch on your skin, and it was heating you up way too quickly. “I think he… He did loosen up a bit. Or that’s how it seems to me”.

“Mmm”, Naeel gave you an inquisitive look. “You’re quite feisty, and he likes that sort of thing, so I sure hope you gave him a hard time and got him a bit out of his element…”

You stared at your friend, blinking. It dawned on you then, why your friend chose him for the task, why she sent Chan to get you, and your jaw would’ve hit the floor if it hadn’t been attached to your face. She was playing matchmaker. She had not only rescued you, but she was trying to get you laid. “You sent Chan with intent! You sent him specifically on purpose!”

“Of course I did!” Naeel laughed, loudly. “I knew you’d like him, and judging by the way you were looking at him I was right! And I was sure he’d like you, too. Haven’t seen him smile as bright as he did when you guys parted earlier!”

“Naeel, dear…” You couldn’t help but scoff a laugh, utterly baffled. “I love you so, so much. You’re nuts”.

“You know me well, my dear. And I love you, too”, Naeel’s smile couldn’t have been any brighter, and it warmed you up. You truly, truly loved your friend deeply, even if she was a bit nuts. “So, does that mean that you guys got acquainted with one another as I hoped?”

You looked at her for a moment, completely silent, your face going dead serious, which made a look of worry flash on her face. Until you couldn’t stop the smile that crept onto your lips. Slowly, you unbuttoned the first few buttons of your shirt, showing Naeel the purple marks on your chest, the marks that Chan had not let fade since the moment he first pressed his mouth on your chest, the marks he left time and time again, making Naeel gasp and bring her hands to her mouth.

“Oh, wow!” Throwing her head back she laughed again, lightly kicking her feet. “I’m a fucking genius! I should be crowned again, Queen of Matchmaking!”

You couldn’t help but laugh with her, reaching for your cup of tea. “I can’t believe you, Naeel…”

Figuring out the logistics of you staying with Naeel was easy. You didn’t want to live at the castle, it reminded you too much of your old life, and you also didn’t want to be pampered anymore. You wanted a new beginning, a different life to that you had known, so your friend helped you settle, giving you a humble house in the castle town and offering you a job as a royal seamstress within her already established team ‘I’ve seen your work, and I’d love to have you design things for me!’. It was a privilege not many could have, and you were aware of it, so you took the offer. If your friend believed in you and your abilities, why wouldn’t you believe in yourself for the task?

Your new home was cosy, just big enough for one person, with enough space for your few belongings. You thought you’d have a hard time your first night there, but it was surprisingly easy for you to fall asleep there. Almost as if your body knew there was no danger, as if it knew you could finally rest.

For your first few days there you didn’t see Chan. You didn’t know where he lived, and you hadn’t had the time to ask Naeel about it, so you settled for waiting until you could run into him, and although there was a part of you that knew he would come looking for you, there was still a part of you that worried he might’ve decided you were not worth his time anymore. That was, until you heard a knock on your door and you opened it to find the man standing right there at your doorstep, with a small bouquet of flowers in his hand.

“Her Majesty told me where you were staying”, he had a sheepish smile on his face, shyly handing you the bouquet, and you couldn’t help the smile that made its way onto your face as you took it. “I was hoping to… To maybe show you around?”

“I’d like that”, stepping into his space, you leaned in, pressing a soft kiss on his lips as your front door closed behind you.

One of Chan’s hands found your waist, pulling you closer to him with an appreciative hum as the other held the back of your head, angling you a bit so he could deepen the kiss. You didn’t care if anyone saw you, just like he also didn’t seem to care, if anything, he held you in his arms confidently, and it made you chuckle against his lips. “I take it you’re no longer conflicted about your feelings for me?”

Chan simply shook his head, removing his hands from your frame so he could link your arm with his and pull you along to walk down the street. “It’s too late for that, princess”.

“Ah, but you’re still calling me princess?” There was no ill intent in your voice, if anything, only a bit of a teasing tone.

“Of course! You are my princess, after all. Are you not, darling?”

You couldn’t help but laugh, tightening your hold on his arm as you continued to walk with him, following him anywhere he pulled you to. “Then I’ll be your princess, and yours only”.

Chan simply smiled at you, one of those smiles that made his face light up, his dimples pop and his eyes disappear, and as usual, you couldn’t help the flutter of your heart at the sight. You didn’t feel like a princess anymore, not like a real one at least, but the switch from it being a title, a title that had only meant pain in your life, to it being a term of endearment, a term used by Chan and only Chan, helped you cope, and you hoped that, in due time, you could finally fully heal.

Constructive feedback is always welcome :)

#bang chan smut #stray kids smut #stray kids fanfiction #bang chan fanfiction #bang chan fic #bang chan x reader #chan x reader #skz fanfic #skz fanfiction #stray kids fanfic #✨🌙✏#i dont have enough strength to make one of my silly little cover images #maybe one day i'll add one

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absolutebl · 5 months

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This Week in BL - Alan & Jeff Forever!

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Jan 2024 Wk 4

Ongoing Series - Thai

The Sign (Sat YT) ep 10 of 12 - I am a little concerned that this is getting too big for its britches, rather like Phaya’s recently recovered snake… shall we say? Adding in yet another character at this juncture isn’t the best idea. Still, I love how this show makes me cackle laugh with grandmas + Yai and then TENSION.

It’s a wobbly kind of balance but a balancing act is happening nonetheless. It makes the pacing of this show good. It may be all over the place but I'm never bored.

Pit Babe (Fri iQIYI) ep 11 of 14 - No trash talk this week, I was charmed & delighted. Who knew I would actually enjoy this show? Certainly not me. (not much of a...) Trash watch happening here.

Cooking Crush (Sun YT) ep 8 of 12 - I am pretty much skipping most of the 3 chef friends, and all of the side dish action (sorry Neo). And with OffGun apart for most of this ep, it didn’t hold together since they are the glue. Sigh.

Last Twilight (Fri YT) ep 12fin - Okay let’s talk about it.

Mhok should have gone off with someone else. Day treated him like shit and never once apologized. To assume an apology isn’t necessary is to pity Day in the exact way he didn’t want. (On a complete aside, one of my favorite Thai restaurants back in my mispent youth was in Hilo, HI… ah memories) meanwhile the "passing escalators trope" activated in the land of malls (it’s been a while my old friend).

Anygay, I hold that Mohk was not a fault and Day was the one who needed to apologize.

Although they did have one of BL's BEST ever face touch moments.

In conclusion:

The story of a blind man and his caregiver falling in love. Mark is great. JimmySea are spectacular. The support cast is GMMTV-good. And for the first 3/4 this BL was something rather special. But it was let down by its ending (for which I entirely blame the author). In order to like this show you must buy into the premise that Mhok was in the wrong and caused their breakup. If you don’t believe that, you won’t like this BL. Also "fixing a disability = true happiness" is gross messaging. For me, endings counts for a lot and this one was ultimately “happy” but felt like a failure. 7/10 and I was sorely tempted to go as low as a 6/10, so it should count itself lucky

I dithered my darling BLabies... I dithered A LOT over this one. But JimmySea alone held this one up.

GMMTV we gotta talk. You're fielding some of the world's best pairs right now. It's time to get them equally good scripts.

For Him (Thurs iQIYI) ep 9 of 12 - This installment had too much of the side couple in it. Although it was nice to see First/Dream (Twins) again. He's still a cutie, even playing a straight.

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) ep 23 of 24 - I have to say I’m very glad we are on the last installment of the series. Narcissistic hairdresser starts seeing a spirit in a mirror. Turns out to be a friend from his youth who he thought was dead. This one is kinda sweet, and I find the premise interesting. Is the kid actually dead and a spirit? Or is there something else going on? I am intrigued. And I like the actor playing the kid in the mirror. I suspect this will be sad tho.

Time the series (Thai Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - I don’t exactly know what is going on. And frankly I don’t particularly care, either. So far nothing seems to be happening, and I really intensely dislike one half of the main couple. DNF welcome 2024 here we go

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Love For Love's Sake (Korea Weds iQIYI) 1-2 of 8 - based on the Manhwa Love Supremacy Zone by Hwacha (they should have kept the original title). I adore the premise. IRL person has been sent into fictional universe to save a side character from doom. Fantastic. Every fanfic author's dream. Also, I love that our POV was the bad boy in high school so there’s also a redemption arc going on. I adore this kind of isekai (if you wanna call it that). Puppy/cat pairing too!

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - Oh my goodness they too cute. Basically dating. Although only one of them realizes it, and he is such a drama queen. It’s GREAT. Also they are both so damn gay. I love the supportive bestie trying to cope with the girl who has a crush on his gay bff.

Happy Ending (Korea Tues YT) 1 of 3 - Strongberry is back and it’s very them and very atmospheric and cute. I’m enjoying it.

Sahara-sensei to Toki-kun (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 7 of 8 - Japan giveth and Japan taketh away again. Look, I just like the lost love teacher/teacher couple better. I'm assuming they'll have to do a time jump in the final episode to make this one work at all.

I am SO GLAD we have KBLs back on our screens.

It's done

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have any spare time. 2024 is crazy busy for me so far.

The Servant and the Young Master - from Vietnam so I assume it's on YouTube. I never even noticed. Anyone?

Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - Is TRUST Entertainment bringing us the first ever Burmese BL? I don't know if it's really the first, but @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will give it a watch through.

Beside You (Thai ????) - a 3 ep short that's supposed to have aired but I can't find it.

It's Airing But...

[NO INTERNATIONAL] Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube) ep 3 of 12 - yeah Japan put the smack down on our boys. Sadness. You can use a VPN if you like. Read all about it here.

Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… probubly not. I won't be watching this. I disliked Season one and actively hated the follow ups. No thank you.

Playboyy (Thurs Gaga) 14 eps - Dear Playboyy, it's not you, it’s me… I hate you. You’re about as deep (and as palatable) as a shot glass of cum. While I'm sure you’re someone’s kink, you're my weakest link. Goodbye. I DNFed this at ep 5. Frankly I'm impressed with myself for getting that far.

The Whisperer (Sun ????) 10 eps - Ends next week. Thai horror BL that ALSO involves cheating (what joy is mine). I don't think even the perfect single dimple can motivate me to watch. Word is... it's terrible.

7 Days Before Valentine (Weds WeTV) 10 eps - Giving me Luminous Solution vibes. I'm waiting to binge if safe.

Dead Friend Forever (Thai Sat iQIYI) - horror, meh, tell me if it's worth my time?