#i am actually anxious | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

notdelusionalatall · 5 months

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uncanny-tranny · 5 months

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This might seem like an "old man yells at cloud" situation, but it's just wild growing up and being told how dangerous distracted driving is - how, at highway speeds, you can traverse the length of a football field (100 yards, 91 meters) in a matter of seconds - how one split second sending a text while driving could result in a potential fatal crash, and then getting on the road as a driver and being surrounded by billboards. Their entire purpose is to catch one's attention, so they're lining major roads, which tend to be highways. How is it that you're told how important it is to never be distracted while driving, but still being advertised to?

At best, this type of advertising is an eyesore to pedestrians and motorists and a general waste of electricity to light it, and at worst, it is an active danger considering they are there to advertise and therefore, must catch people's attention.

I'm not even against advertising in theory, but this particular mode bothers me so much and I hate how pervasive it is - especially in large cities or highways.

#politics #i don't know much about são paulo banning marketing billboards but on paper i want that here in the USA #as a motorist it at best just makes me more anxious driving in those larger cities because i want to FOCUS ON THE ROAD #and passing 5000 billboards per mile isn't helping actually!#i've gotten good at filtering that out of my FOV but it's still fucking exhausting lol #i especially hate those modern electric billboards. despise them actually #i am aware that advertising is a critical aspect to business management in some cases...#...but it shouldn't risk the safety of the populous for you to advertise to them and i see things like billboards as risking safety...#...i feel similarly about online advertising in that so much of it risks internet user's safety...#...such as flashing ads online which risk triggering epileptic seizures in light/photo-sensitive folks #distracted driving (texting): NO >:( || distracted driving (being advertised to): YAYYYY :D #i've been driving on my own for a few years now and i've been thinking about this for ENTIRELY too long

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aresonist · 9 months

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(/p) shout out to lovely by twenty one pilots

#my art #mcyt #gtws #hermitcraft #goodtimeswithscar #grian #life series #i am so anxious to post this one actually bc ik it will be taken as shipping but it is what it is #desert duo #all rab songs are somewhat conencted to life series desert boys but im not sharing all that #this might become a series atp

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taio-kyo · 22 days

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Ultrakill brainrot doodles because tomorrow is my bday and I'm allowed to indulge :]

S-0 scares me.

#normally i get awfully anxious about making fanart but. this actually didnt make me panic #which is GREAT #anyway here come the tags #ultrakill #v1 ultrakill #kitr ultrakill #something wicked ultrakill #ferryv2 #ferryman ultrakill #v2 ultrakill #that should be everyone.#i am not tagging the filth sorry filth nation they had to be killed for the general atmosphere of the drawing #im gonna go to bed goodnite everyone #also v models are small. to me. i hope you agree.

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realbeefman · 8 months

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stacy is sooo interesting because she's in love with house but knows that they will never ever be able to have a healthy, stable, sane relationship because they're too similar so. she finds house-lite instead and marries him and. essentially moves on with her life! and is successful in this because she's a moderately well-adjusted person!

wilson, in contrast, never manages to escape the inevitable, in spite of his best efforts to find a house-lite of his very own, because he's an absolute fucking freak and ends up glued to house to the bitter. bitter end

#yeah im too sleepy to revise this. UNFILTERED posting wooahh #some may b shocked but i do actually read thru most of my posts several times to make sure i didnt accidentally write mein kampfe 2 #recently ive come to the realization that i am in fact not an incredibly chill person #and that the constant paranoia and fear in which i live my life is actually PROBABLY a symptom of severe anxiety #like damn. ive always known that im pretty prone to depression but ive preetty much always been aware of that #my mom is a chronic depressive so i know the symptoms i know the signs i have a pretty good arsenal of healthy coping mechanisms #UNFORTUNATELY mommy's mental health problems did not help her not abuse me as a child #so i ended up being a terribly anxious kid who was constantly being screamed at and told i was overreacting (because i was. because i had #a severe anxiety problem that was making me react irrationally.) to everything all the time #which is you know. it is VERY difficult to deal with a mental health problem when you arent aware you have a problem!#its incredible how much. better. my life has gotten since i figured this out and started actively trying to work out what triggers it #and being able to like. realize 'oookay. there is an Issue here and it needs to be overcome'#instead of just beating on myself constantly for not being able to do things without feeling sick or getting breathing problems!#anyways. trauma dumping in tags is over now!#house md #hilson #greg house #james wilson #stacy warner

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inkovert · 3 months

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I don't make the rules but - if you don't get excited at the thought of going back and re-reading the story you wrote then you're writing the wrong story.

You are your first and most important reader.

#the way I got into my bed one night and was awake and anxious at 2 AM and decided to open my story on my phone and read it from ch 1 #I was having a blast and didn't want to tear myself away to go to sleep #also been daydreaming about the scenes in this chapter I'm currently writing that may or may not make its way into the actual story #but every day or so I begrudgingly write a few hundred words to get it on paper #and I go back and reread it voraciously until I get to the point where I left off and am like WHERE IS THE REST #so yeah #what is the point of putting words to paper if not to finally indulge in the pleasure of reading and enjoying the scenes we daydream about?

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lonicera-edulis · 1 year

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More wips.

#I am too worried to sit and spend time on finishing art actually :(#I don't know why it feels so anxious to sit and draw for too long now #wips #damn why I can't draw Arwen help #can't finish that rivendell piece

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ind1c0lite · 10 months

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(Basic context is that AU of Duel Desinties where the phantom impersonates Phoenix to get him found guilty of Clay's murder, I talk more under the cut abt it jkhlj)

-Basically meant to be a parallel to turnabout trump, cause if you can have ONE boss get found guilty of murder, why not a second one?

-OK basically: everything in DD happens normally until like- a day before clays murder, Phoenix gets yoinked by the phantom somehow (he is still alive, just being held captive), Phantom is still Fulbright, but they've decided to be silly goofy (target Phoenix and get him found guilty of murder, escape police custody and then murder phoenix and make it seem like Phoenix accidentally died while on the run, thats why they didn't kill phoenix right away unlike the real Fulbright) there is an imposter amo-

-I dont have the logistics as to how this affects solving Metis's murder, and how it effects what evidence is used n whatnot and turnabout for tomorrow as a whole, so im just going nuts HGJKHLJ

-Originally I was actually imagining this taking place during turnabout for tomorrow and I wanted that case to be apollo v klavier instead of phoenix and edgeworth and thats why klav is in here instead of Simon (I decided that Simon got badly injured and couldn't stand in court for the retrial, so klavier was asked to step in)

-The courtroom bombing still happens the same way it does normally, but Apollo decides to take up the case again instead of taking a leave, instead of like, you know, healing from the traumatic event that just happened, turnabout countdown still happens as well

-Apollo and Athena do not find out about the phantom's existence until well after this trial, so they have no idea that Phoenix could've possibly been replaced, though simon, after hearing about the trial, might be suspicious about whether or not that was the real Phoenix

-The Phantom had been not only keeping an eye on Simon for a while, but was also stalking Phoenix and Edgeworth after they both started looking into UR-1, so they were able to impersonate phoenix so well that not even his own daughter thought that anything was up (though while Trucy did find him a *little* bit off, but she figured that it might've been the bombing that caused him to act ever so slightly weird, so she didn't pay much mind to it until she heard about his confession in court and realized it might've been because he possibly, ya know, killed someone)

-it's pretty much just switching Athena being framed for murder with Phoenix, and instead of the trial ending on a cliffhanger, it continues on (probably with Klavier insisting on it) ending with soloman being found innocent and Phoenix being declared guilty

-There's a couple days inbetween the end of the cosmic turnabout and the start of turnabout for tomorrow, so Athena, Apollo and Trucy all get a little bit to process the fact that "oh god my boss/my dad killed someone" (simons execution date is pushed back a bit in this au) and they probably get to talk with Klavier and eventually a lil bit with Simon after he gets out

-Im not sure how it all winds down in turnabout for tomorrow (Phoenix escaping and being at large is basically the perfect cover for the phantom to resume being fulbright for that trial) but they do eventually realize that the phoenix who confessed wasn't the real one and now there's a search on going to find out where the real one is being held captive, hes fineeee just ready to take a week long nap and a good vacation (along with every other waa member)

-I dont have anything else to add on rn but if you want to add something or just throw in a scenario feel free to!! this idea has been bouncing around my head for like a month now and Im very happy to finally show yall it

#ace attorney #ace attorney dual destinies #apollo justice #athena cykes #klavier gavin #phoenix wright #copycat au #indys art #apollo faints like- 0.5 seconds after the verdict is called which is very understandable #Apollo and Athenas horrible no good very bad court trial #and klavier isn't fairing any better tbh HJGKHL #no one is doing well at all and it gets worse before it gets better hjgkhl #Im both very excited but also TERRIFED posting this #I rarely try to actually write actual serious dialogue for characters cause im not a writer-so im hoping it's like- halfway decent HGJKH #I may be anxious as hell but Im going to be very brave and post this instead of- not doing that HJGKHL #I also tried to push myself a bit with this one so I included more panels to work on and coloured it #I like how it came out though!!#I hope u enjoy <3 #also if something doesn't make sense blame it on the fact that I wrote the caption and these tags at like 2:30 am

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droodlebug · 7 months

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my phone camera is tje bane of my existence anyway wyll and blight. theyre in my brain

#droodles #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #wyll #wyll ravengard #durge #blight #oc #ocs #i am not a writer writing makes me anxious. i rewrote the single sentence there like three times #bc i could not settle on a way i thought wyll would actually phrase that sentiment #my brain is made for pichers not worbs ✌️

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moeblob · 2 days

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Look, I just think it's VERY funny and on brand that I thought of an entire premise of colorful characters for half the cast and immediately drew the only one void of color.

#my characters #i will not bore you all too much in the main post but now its story time in the tags so yeefuckinghaw #noll is a fae and is distinctly the only one that just lacks colors #at first he was like well surely i can wear colorful stuff to make up for my dark hair and eyes !#and then he overhears some of the fae talking about how hes a blemish to the fae and hes like well fuck #guess its time to go all in baby! and decks himself out in all black and jagged clothing #and he tries to play it off as hes an idiot and a lot of the fae actually believe its not ALL an act #like they can tell he thinks about stuff but he normally does it staring into space so they dont care to ask #cause surely it isnt important enough to brood about hes just thinking about stuff #and he really REALLY has a lot of confidence issues and worries that more fae are disturbed by his darkness than let on #but then the other fae that like to hang out with him are like #YOOOOOO THATS OUR LIL VOID! THATS OUR LIL GUY! our lil black spot look at him hes so edgy and cute!#and treat him like a pet cat at times giving him head pats even if he bats their hands away #and the plot premise is that some of the fae are bored and decide they should go play with some humans! give THEM enrichment too!#and noll gets roped into it and The Game is basically go find a human partner and convince them to be an ally #then the fae give the humans cool lil toys (weapons) and are like GO FORTH MY CHAMPION!#so noll keeps like ... not picking anyone to participate because its not just A Game to him #if he can prove victorious in A Game with outside factors such as humans then he can prove hes not #an absolute disappointment to the fae like he has a lot riding on this in his mind #and his friends are just like buddy you cant even play if you dont pick a human you gotta #anyway here is noll and then i have ideas for two other fae and also a veeeery vague idea for two of the humans though not as sure yet #rae if you read all this you should know the cobalt is a fae thanks bye #i am so stressed posting ocs every single time and i am incredibly depressed and anxious #so good lord please let me not just delete all the tags in an hour bc im ashamed

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notdelusionalatall · 2 months

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hellomagicalsouls · 27 days

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i love Patrick Brewer

just the way he looks at David. i mean, damn he looks like he falls in love every time he sees David. his eyes, his face, that man was in love from the moment that David didn't understand a Baseball reference.

PROVE ME WRONG. YOU CANNOT.

Patrick actually sees David for David. Anxious David, Snarky David, Insecure David and he loves him completely all the same.

fuck I love them. Patrick and David people, Patrick and David.

#schitts creek #schitt's creek #david rose #patrick brewer #david x patrick #they are in love #actually true love #i will hear no complaints #no arguments #argue with your mother #patrick brewer is a button #david rose is an anxious bitch #why am i tagging this like fanfics #they see each other #and they grew together and got through things together #and it's late and im emotional about them

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ferahntics · 7 months

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Nana's 1st birthday...

#what a year its been with her though wow #went from grumpus central to certified grandma and getting married #I was thinking of actually having her uh... not live. like her going down alongside spectra where neither survive #needless to say that plan got scrapped xDD #she gets to be happy now <3 #also thank you all for liking her I was so anxious coming into the Kirby community #but ya'll have been so nice I just aaaa <333 #am rambling its emotional hours for me #quiver #quiver knight #mine #my art #trying markers and colored pencils and figuring out my scanner bare with me #kirby #kirby oc #fan character #uploading like an hour too early but heck I KNOW I'll forget dfhkjdfh birthday is 24th

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swinging-stars-from-satellites · 2 months

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sigh. pray for me once more I've slipped up in dealing with my sinful thought processes and temptations

#why do I just Not Care if I sin as long as I don't feel guilty #like I Know in my head I should do one thing but it isn't strong enough to actually motivate me to unless I feel guilty and anxious abt it?#I don't get it. I think I just let my Feelings control me too much which is. a major issue in all aspects of my life #anyway. here I am again. confessing and repenting. hopefully I'll do better :/#prayer request

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iraprince · 3 months

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Hiii, i love your stuff and kinda from a distance really look up at you for, in my perception, being able to express yourself without giving a fuck. Thats sick dude, Im so so afraid, of absolutely everything, its nice to think like i might grow into someone less apologetic of my existence. Nice to see people just being yknow

hey, thank you, this is really really nice. the secret that is probably not a secret is that i am also deeply afraid a lot of the time lmao -- but less than i used to be, and in ways that feel less stifling and self-suffocating, if that makes sense.

like, it used to be "i'm scared that if i express myself the way i want to, everyone will find me obnoxious, so let's just sand those edges down to be safe" -- now my fears are more like "now that i'm expressing myself in a way that feels natural and real, i'm afraid that it's all stupid/vapid/not worthwhile or meaningful" (<- specifically abt my art) or "i'm happy that i talk and act the way i want to now, but what if it makes me impossible to befriend," etc etc etc. which still feels bad and puts me in a funk a lot of the time but at least it's a fear that comes After/in reaction to doing stuff, rather than a fear that STOPS me from doing stuff, you know? like, it's evolved into a kind of fear that's less in my way.

anyway. i believe you'll experience something like this, because wanting to grow is the first step of growing. the fact that u hope or wish for something different means you're already on your way. to fewer fucks!! or at least distributing the fucks u give in a way that serves u better

#stuff like accepting that i'm reserved and i'm not very accessible via messages.#or that my online tone isn't very bubbly and it's weird and uncomfortable to force it.#i stop letting fears about that shape my behavior ('i'll look mean or snotty so let's force markers of Friendliness to avoid that!!') -#- and instead act the way i want to and then trade it in for new fears that come After the action.#also a good reminder to give urself is that if ur fear is abt how other ppl perceive u (as 90% of mine is personally)#u really... can't actually control that. and being very very anxious abt it all the time is usually ur brain throwing a tantrum abt not--#--having that control. bc it is understandably very scary that u don't have that control #as much as it sucks + is terrifying the truth is the only thing u can do is ask urself 'am i behaving in a way that i'm proud of'#'am i behaving in a way that's in alignment w my values + what i think is important'#bc if the answer to that is yes and somebody hates u or is deeply offended by ur existence anyway. well. literally not ur problem #but obv being at peace w that is way way easier said than done + requires tons of practice and will take. probably. years. which is fine #i am stuck with myself. i can either contort myself forever trying to be someone everyone will like and find totally nonthreatening and-#inoffensive and in the process exhaust myself totally and never feel safe or natural myself. OR #i can say okay. so i am a kind of prickly guy with stern and drab speech patterns and close to no social energy. and i think i can still be #-sexy and fun this way. and it is up to other ppl to figure out if they can agree w me on that #ANYWAY enough rambling for now. just another one of those things i think abt a lot so i have a lot of ready-made sentences abt it in mind

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napping-sapphic · 5 months

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Honestly so good that I’m too shy to talk to people because I’m like 80% sure my impulsive ass would just ask strangers if they wanted to try to fall in love just to see if we could

#wlw #wlw mood #sapphic #sapphism #lesbian #i spend SO much time wondering if i could actually fall in love with people if i deliberately tried to #because tbh sometimes i think i could #and i just don’t like how complicated it all is #like sometimes i just wanna go hey lets just date and see what happens #skip all the rest of it #but you gotta keep safety first for one #and also i think most people Do Not Want To Do That #idk it’s 4 am #and i feel absolutely AWFUL #and SO antsy right now oh my god #i hate being simultaneously antsy anxious AND tired at once it feels so nasty #so i don’t really know if the tags make sense #the post should i drafted it a while ago #but was like maybe that’s weird and didn’t post it #BUT i keep feeling it soooo #here you go #sorry it’s 4 am im a mess #ignore me #and my tags #idk what i said pls take it as nonsense <3 #im gay and i like sleeping

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