Can’t stop thinking about House pre-infarction.

Like Stacy says he was the same before as he is after but that is so obviously not completely true.

Sure House has always had a disregard for social niceties, always been a genius, always bucked against authorities, but think about the little things we learn about him pre-infarction, and how he behaves while the ketamine treatment is effective.

He played lacrosse in High School. He was a cheerleader in college. He met Wilson at a medical conference. He met Stacy at a Doctors vs Lawyers paintball game. The infarction happened during a game of golf. After the temporarily successful ketamine treatment House goes for miles long runs, skateboards, wears nice suits.

Pre-infarction House was athletic. He cared about his appearance. He was social. He went out and did things and had relationships. Yeah he’s always been a bit of an ass, but he was an ass with a life.

It’s only post-infarction that all of that stops. His relationship ends, he only goes to conferences when forced, he can’t be athletic, he doesn’t want to be social. He can’t be bothered to do more than throw a sport coat on over jeans and a t-shirt.

His addiction aside, all of the above things showcase what a hard time he has coping with having a disability. He doesn’t find new ways to be social, find activities he can do. Instead he isolates himself. He tries to make himself unappealing. He goes to work, and he goes home alone.

The only relationship he manages to maintain is with Wilson, and he even acknowledges that House has changed when he confronts him about his Vicodin addiction. (Yes I know he has brief relationships over the course of the series but none of them can really be compared to his 5 year long, live in relationship with Stacey prior to the infarction, regardless of how one feels about her as a person.)

It just breaks my heart to know that House’s disability took so much from him, and that the resulting depression stops him from trying to seek any type of happiness, and when he does find some he’s convinced it will end.

TLDR: I have a lot of feelings about Gregory House and how his disability changed his life.

House M.D. & Hands

5x24 "Both Sides Now", 4x15 "House's Head", 4x16 "Wilson's Heart", 3x15 "Half Wit", 1x11 "Detox", 1x21 "Three Stories", 5x20 "Simple Explanation", 8x19 "The C Word"

Listen the reason House was so confident about being able to break up Stacy’s marriage is because he’s been able to do it to all of Wilson’s marriages without fail

surprise surprise i am a stacy/cuddy truther

HOUSE, M.D. — 1.21 • Three Stories + bonus:

stacy is sooo interesting because she's in love with house but knows that they will never ever be able to have a healthy, stable, sane relationship because they're too similar so. she finds house-lite instead and marries him and. essentially moves on with her life! and is successful in this because she's a moderately well-adjusted person!

wilson, in contrast, never manages to escape the inevitable, in spite of his best efforts to find a house-lite of his very own, because he's an absolute fucking freak and ends up glued to house to the bitter. bitter end

House | 1x08 "The Mistake"

when stacy asks house if he would cut his leg off to save her life… the broken down, painfully soft and sad way he says “of course i would” like it’s not even a question AGHHHHFHHFJDJDJDKD that man is capable of loving so deeply im eating my couch cushions

Stacy/Cuddy I owe you my life

(Screencap ref below the cut!)

there is this person on archiveofourown that absolutely despises stacy and every house fic ive seen of theirs that mentions stacy headcanons her as abusive which. theyre written really good so i like them. the problem is im having trouble rewatching these episodes because of how much i accepted their work as canon

i will say your name wishb0ne i will say your name!

son of a coma guy, three stories, the c word

GOD the house not feeling like he deserves to live parallel coupled with wilson’s words. OUGHHHHHH. THIS SHOW.

i truly do not believe that there is enough discourse on this site about stacy and how she violated house's autonomy. let me preface this by saying that i do in fact love stacy as a character, however i think what she did was incredibly wrong, especially considering she shows no remorse for what she did.

in one breath, part of me is able to understand why she did what she did. i mean, she saw him go into cardiac arrest once, and she was obviously worried about it happening again while he was in his coma. that being said, house was very clear about what he wanted, and what he wanted was to see if he could heal on his own, but in a medically induced coma so that he didn't have to suffer through the painful parts of the recovery. he very well could have pulled through and lived the rest of his life pain free. but because he gave her the role of his medical proxy, the decision was ultimately up to her under the circumstances that he was physically unable to advocate for himself, and since he was in a coma, that's where the medical decisions were now in her hands. but instead of allowing house to have the chance to heal on his own, she waited until he was physically unable to communicate his needs and wants and immediately signed the consent forms that ultimately crippled him.

i wholeheartedly believe that had stacy actually given him the chance to have his way and something ended up happening to him and then she signed the consent forms, he would have been less bitter when he woke up to find out that she had gone behind his back and essentially abused her position as his medical proxy. she knew what he wanted, completely disregarded it and violated his autonomy. she consistently reminds him that she "saved his life" when he tries to voice how hurt he is by what she did as an attempt to shut him down, but neither of them will ever actually know if she saved his life. he could have pulled through and lived a normal life but she had to go and do what she wanted.

and i think what makes it all worse is that the second stacy had to face the consequences of her own actions during his recovery, she walked away because he was miserable. she created that mess and couldn't even be there to clean it up because she realized that he was nothing more than a burden on her.

again, i'm not going to sit here and say that her call was a bad call. it very well could have saved his life, but it's the fact that she went behind his back and waited until he was unable to advocate for himself that bothers me. it's no wonder he doesn't trust anybody.

coming soon to a tumblr dashboard near you: a house md crack video by yours truly

Feeling unhinged this good evening because Stacy and Wilson are opposites. She knows that 1) House is the love of her life and 2) she Cannot Be With Him because it's too painful and unhealthy. And Wilson. Wilson cannot say or consciously recognize that House is THE love of his life!!! However!!! He will never fucking let House go. He can't admit it but he will be with House forever even though it's SO painful and so unhealthy, he simply cannot make the choice to live without him and so goodbye all I'm going to walk into an event horizon

sometimes I think about House and Stacy too long and I want to claw my brain out. Every single relationship in this show has the same agonizing outcome which is:

Love just isn't enough.

Love wasn't enough for Stacy to stay with House.

Love wasn't enough for House to try their relationship again.

Love wasn't enough to save Amber's life.

Love wasn't enough for Cameron to stay with Chase.

Love wasn't enough for Taub and Rachel to work it out.

Love wasn't enough for Cuddy to stay with House.

Love wasn't enough to save Wilson's life either.

throwback thursday to the very inspired art piece i made while watching house season 2