i was on NPR talking about Autism shit two weeks ago, and i have the book sales figures from that week and that national media appearance had.... absolutely zero relationship to sales. on the typical week these days, 1,400 to 1,500 copies of Unmasking Autism will sell. The week that I was on NPR there was a slight dip; only about 1,300 books were sold.

i have done a lot of press for my books. For Laziness Does Not Exist I did easily a 100 damn podcasts and radio shows and newspapers and excerpts in magazines. none of it corresponded to a noticeable bump in sales. the biggest "get" my publicist found for my latest book was the Glennon Doyle show, a booking she and her team celebrated and then spent months clamboring excitedly for... it, too, had no obvious relationship to sales.

Unmasking Autism became a bestseller because some other guy made a tiktok about it, and then a bunch of tiktokkers made videos about it too. all on their own. without any prodding from me, or any relationship to me. it was completely organic, passionate, and sincere, and rooted in the book's true merits and usefulness to other people, and that's why it inspired lots of sales. and continues to more than a year and a half later. all the press I did for Unmasking Autism prior to the release of that tiktok did relatively far less. NPR, Goop, the LA Times, Lit Hub, Jacobin, Huffpo, the New York Times, the Financial Times, MSNBC, Business Insider. Didn't matter. at least not much. so why do i bother?

publishers really ride your ass trying to make you give lots of interviews and show up for lots of events but it's all based on the worship of traditional media and magical thinking that it will somehow convert listeners into buyers. and that's just not how it works. the truth is 95% of books never sell more than 5,000 copies, and most people don't buy books or read them. i love reading but i dont think this is itself some terrible loss, as most books are padded-out commodities made for sale more than a work of true artistic passion or scholarly merit, and sometimes listening to a 90 minute interview with an author tells you the bulk of what you need to know.

it's freeing to know that the effort i put into getting my books out into the world have almost zero relationship to the books' success. marketing just does not work. it's a relief. unmasking autism did fabulously because it's actually both good and useful. laziness has had a long life span because it speaks to real problems in people's lives and gives them a message they are desperate to hear. but no amount of thirsty ass online shilling will make somebody realize that and it's maddening to try. you just gotta focus on doing good work, work that you enjoy making or need to make and that you feel good about, let things flop if theyre gonna flop, and keep on living your life.

which is all good news because i really do hate a lot of these fucking interviews. how can i stomach being on npr or in the atlantic or whatever these days given how complicit nearly all major media outlets are in justifying this genocide. like who fuckin cares about them, who wants their approval. who needs it. it's of no value

Rewatched My Stand-In eps 2 and 3 tonight, and I'm definitely newly fascinated with Ming POV/Ming's internal concept of what was happening between him and Joe that entire time. I forgot just how much we got of Ming's home life and family in episode 2, and my brain is abuzz trying to connect all the dots. His relationship with May is so interesting. She clocks that he and Joe are together on Christmas, and is immediately careful to conceal it not just from their parents but from Tong. May and Ming have this "us against the world" vibe where they protect and cover for each other, going back to May giving herself pneumonia saving Ming from drowning. I absolutely believe there's more going on in their family than mom pressuring Ming to marry women any time he goes home - I actually suspect things about his family are being obscured for future painful reveals - but May is a safe space for him. Until Tong is added into the picture, and Ming has to flee the country for four years to get away from his big feelings. It's just kind of bonkers to me that he had this intense, safe and presumably very grounding relationship with his sister, but made his obsession with a random movie star the centerpiece of his world instead. Why did he imprint on Tong? Is it really just Joe's sexy back muscles that drew him in? Did he think if he could land a famous movie star his parents would accept him being with a man? Was it subconscious self-sabotage of his only safe relationship lol? I genuinely have no idea!! What I am stuck on though is when he told May he was working through something, and would tell her when he was ready, but he promised he'd get through it. On rewatch, it seems very obvious that what he's talking about is the torch he's carrying for Tong, so to me that's a reveal that he's deliberately trying to move on with Joe - not using him as a sex doll replacement, but throwing himself into something real. (What's messy obviously is that Ming started this for the proxyfucking, but I think overhearing Joe confess his love for Ming to Sol is when Ming started making a determined effort to choose Joe.) There's also his reaction to Joe's Christmas gift where the watch becomes a metaphor for Joe himself (vs. Tong): Ming doesn't need the "top" one, why can't he want the "normal" one?

The first time I was watching this, I assumed that Ming just has no internal awareness of how important Joe is to him, he just feels pure need and acts very very normal when his emotional support stand-in is ripped away. I assumed Ming believes he's in love with Tong and thinks he's just passing some time with Joe. It doesn't help that every time Joe presses him on anything emotional Ming shuts him down or outright negs him lolllll

But like for example, in the scene where they're shopping together and Joe gets excited about the couple mugs, first Ming snaps "What makes you think we're a couple?", then he tries to mitigate his slip by playing it off: "after living with me, you'll realize you don't want me as a boyfriend." His kneejerk impulse to shut Joe down and say cruel things is imo a defense mechanism, a really maladaptive one that helps convince Joe later on that there was never any love there, but I'm starting to think it's triggered in response to actually wanting the intimacy and primacy that Joe is pushing for, and being terrified of that.

It would make so much sense for somebody who is terrified of needing anybody else, of being vulnerable or feeling anything real, to decide they're in love with a complete asshole movie star who uses their family for money and them personally for favors, and shape their life around that. Especially now that I understand how young Ming was when he first fixated on Tong (17ish??), I just feel like that entire imprinting is your classic teenager-who-is-not-ready-to-be-in-a-real-relationship parasocial spiral. I used to do it with male celebrities too!!! (I am a lesbian. lmfaooo)

It's interesting because while there's something conceptually romantic about the back Ming first got obsessed with being Joe's all along, it ultimately doesn't really matter to me WHO the onscreen person that he fixated upon was. What matters is how ill-equipped Ming has proven to handle real feelings for a real person in front of him, and the journey he has from here to learn how to human. I can't wait. P.S. Other thing I forgot happened in episode 2: - Ming made drunk!Joe sleep on the floor of Joe's own home - BEFORE Ming moved in or had any claim to the space - AFTER Ming told Sol he would take "really really good care of Joe" as a way of trying to claim Joe in front of the competition His journey to human is going to be a loooooooooooooooooong one, methinks... 😈

hi !! could i maybe get some rex splode x gnc trans male reader stuff, if you’re cool with that !! maybe smth abt the reader getting misgendered for wearing clothes they feel more comfortable with and rex stepping in to defend them :o thank you sm !!

Rex Sloan/Rex splode x ftm reader

Headcanons

Rex wasn’t the best guy up until getting shot in the second season, but that wouldn’t matter if you guys were dating, except for the fact that he would apologize to you and try his hardest to be a better boyfriend.

He might have misgendered you on accident the very first time you guys met, but when you corrected him that didn’t happen again. He might have been a dick sometimes, but he isn’t a bigot.

I like to think Rex is secretly into fashion at a low level, since he’s into stuff like decorating. So, he would be excited to help you plan your outfits.

Since he is a government experiment, he wouldn’t have that deeply ingrained image of gender either, so he wouldn’t care too much about you, your gender, or your way of expressing yourself.

In the beginning he wouldn’t be into wearing anything feminine himself though, since he’s quite insecure and unsure about himself and the image he puts off. But that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t support you.

His insecurity would have crossed over to how people treat you though. Since disrespecting you is also disrespecting him, but also because he loves you and doesn’t want you getting mistreated.

This leads to him getting into fights, both verbal and physical, since how dare they treat you like that? Who the fuck do they think they are? They can taste his damn explosions if they’re gonna keep that shit up.

In the beginning his acts of defending you can be quite a lot, since he takes peoples comments more personal that you do. To the point where he might even get snippy with people who do it on accident even if they correct themselves immediately after being informed.

But after getting shot in the head and rethinking a lot about himself, Rex would become better at dealing with himself, his emotions and his reactions.

This not only leads to him being a better boyfriend in general, but also not reacting so quick to violence and anger if somebody says the wrong thing or looks at you wrong. He still keeps a sharp eye on people though, especially when you are dressing the ways you prefer.

Where in the past Rex would make a loud scene, after the bullet he would be more lowkey. And by that, I mean, pull the person to the side or just quietly tell them that if they don’t stop nobody would be able to find the pieces of their body after he blew them up.

Of course he doesn’t always end up using threats of death, but that’s mainly because he knows you wouldn’t like it. to Rex, being transphobic on purpose deserves it, but since it wouldn’t be what you and others wanted, he would keep it as a last defense. Or at least wait for no one else to be around.

He makes sure to check up on you afterwards too. Rex would try to be subtle, but he isn’t really the most subtle guy. So, when he’s trying to see if your okay and affirm your gender, he says something like “you know you’re the most handsome guy I know, right?”

After understanding himself better, he might even get the interest in trying to wear different things. At this point I can’t imagine him wearing it in public, but when he’s alone or together with you, he might put on a few different things to see how he feels.

Rex always gets embarrassed about it though, especially if you comment about it, even if it’s telling him it looks good. So your best bet is to not mention it until he brings it up himself.

Wrap My Name Across Your Mouth

First off, how dare. HOW DARE. I make a silly fucking bet that if I wrote a kiss scene, A CERTAIN SOMEBODY WOULD WRITE ME A TAMDRAS SCENE. Well they did and it was fucking amazing and now I gotta post this

Summary: Andras helps Tamlin get up in the morning.

Words: less than 1k

“C’mon, Tam…” A voice soothed distantly, muddled and hazy.

Tamlin stirred slowly, the fogginess of sleep heavy on his mind. He was about to fall under again when he felt a calloused, gentle hand lightly shake his bare shoulder. The hand slowed to a stop and the fingers moved to thrum a tune against Tamlin’s skin.

“Wakey-wakey. If I have to get up at the asscrack of dawn then so do you.” The voice sang cheerfully. 

Tamlin turned his head away from the sound with a groan. The hand lifted from his shoulder, giving Tamlin a brief second of hope for peace, but then the hand returned to start slapping the side of his face. 

Without opening his eyes Tamlin lazily started batting the hand away. The hand retaliated with equal force, and a slap fight ensued for much longer than appropriate for the likes of a High Lord. 

“Fine,” The voice finally said, their hand drawing back. “Be like that, then.” Footsteps echoed across the room; the side with the door. 

Tamlin resisted the smile tugging at his mouth, continuing to be stoned-faced. Victory. 

However, quick, loud stomps suddenly thundered, drawing closer to the bed: Like someone getting a running start. 

Tamlin opened his eyes just in time to watch helplessly as Andras, grinning wildly, dived onto the bed and landed on Tamlin, Andras’ elbow burying itself in Tamlin’s gut, knocking the air out of him with a noise akin to a dying goat. 

Andras cackled as Tamlin curled in on himself, writhing in agony. Eventually, Tamlin felt the metal plating of Andras’ uniform press against his back and well-tuned arms wrapped around his waist. “Tam,” Andras let the syllable draw out like a whine. “You have to get up. I can’t face the cruel world without you.” He buried his face between Tamlin’s shoulder blades with a huff. 

“Then perish.” Tamlin knew Andras could hear the smile in his words when the arms at his waist squeezed fondly. 

After a moment of bliss, Andras slowly lifted his head and placed his lips at the base of Tamlin’s neck. “Tam.” He said again, slowly murmuring it into Tamlin’s skin like it was sacred. A prayer. 

Tamlin tried to repress a shiver: an electric, exhilarating warmth that flowed through his veins like liquid gold.

One hand remained at his waist, fingers idly toying with the waistband of Tamlin’s sleepwear, while the other glided up his body and came to rest at the front of his neck. No pressure, just a warm weight. Safe. 

Andras lightly tilted Tamlin’s head and murmured his nickname again. This time, where his neck met his shoulder. “You’re doing a shit job at making me want to leave this bed.” Tamlin mused breathily.

Andras’ head moved upwards, his lips trailing along Tamlin’s skin. “I’m multitasking,” he whispered next to his ear, his breath hot and tickling, before nipping at the shell of it.  

Tamlin cursed. His grip on the sheets tightened, and a sliver of claws peaked out at the tip of his fingers. 

“Careful, Tam,” Andras warned playfully, now leaning over and mouthing the words into Tamlin’s jaw. His hand at Tamlin’s neck moved to cup the other side of his face. “You’ve just replaced those along with the frame.” 

“I wonder whose fault was that in the first place.” Tamlin snapped hotly. Andras made an innocent noise that vaguely resembled an ‘I don’t know’, before suddenly catching Tamlin’s lips in his teeth. Both them tasting a hint of blood. He let his teeth up quickly and tilted both their heads into a kiss. 

Tamlin twisted his body to face Andras directly, yanked his hands away from the sheets, and buried them into other’s dark curls. Claws grazing so carefully along his scalp. “Tam,” Andras’ breathed into his lips before deepening the kiss. His hand tightened around Tamlin’s hip, just barely soft enough to not form a bruise. The other that was still cupped Tamlin’s cheek moved to tuck a blond lock of hair behind his ear. 

Andras tasted like coffee strong enough to kill the Bog, stolen cookies from the kitchens, and euphoria. 

Abruptly, just as quickly as it started, Andras drew his head back and pulled them both into sitting positions. Tamlin followed along like a ragdoll. Hands still tight in Andras’ hair. 

“Andras?” Tamlin said dazedly, and Andras just stared at him, yellow eyes boring into his. He placed a hand on the middle of Tamlin’s chest and the other underneath his chin. His thumb pulled on the bottom of Tamlin’s bruised lip. 

Slowly. Agonizingly slowly, he leaned in, closed his eyes, opened his mouth, and…

“Get your lazy ass out of bed.” Andras suddenly pushed Tamlin off the mattress, making him tumble onto the floor, dragging the sheets along with him in a messy heap. Tamlin’s back hit the ground with a hard thud. 

Tamlin stared blankly at the ceiling, uncomprehendingly. Andras poked his head like a gopher over the side of the mattress, that same wild grin from before painted on his face. 

“C’mon, Tam,” Andras cooed while Tamlin idly thought of all the ways to fucking strangle him. “The Court doesn’t run itself!”

Andras gracefully pushed himself off the bed, a bounce in his step, and skipped towards the door. He grabbed a hold of the handle, turned his head, and blew a kiss accompanied by a sultry wink.

“I’ll meet you in your office later after training the fresh meat. Until then, My Lord, Tamlin.”

Andras bowed low and slow, closed the door with a slam, and Tamlin swore he heard Andras whistling as he walked away. 

Tamlin was in love. 

Here is something that really pissed me off.

This criminally underrated unsigned artist, who goes by the name Jesse Jo Stark (I posted about her on my page many times - including today) did an interview with SPIN. She said she sent Jack White/TMR her EP's every month for a year. Jack never responded and neither did Third Man Records. She's been doing it independent all these years. She is still with no label.

Despite all this, her streaming numbers are excellent.

The interview in question is this one.

Go to the 31:23 mark to hear what she said about Jack White. She did this interview 9 days ago.

How the hell does Jack/TMR ignore a raw talent like Jesse Jo Stark but quickly gave Olivia Jean a contract? How does TMR continue to release Olivia Jean albums when they don't sell? Her streaming numbers are abysmal. Nobody listens to her music except for a few Jack White fans who think it's cool to listen to her just because she's on the TMR label. That is real life. That is the reality. No one likes this woman. No one cares.

I took a screenshot of Olivia's Spotify page just now. Compare it to Jesse Jo Stark's numbers - who I repeat is unsigned/no label. Jesse's numbers are amazing for somebody who isn't signed or getting pushed by any label. Now look at Olivia, who is signed and pushed by a label. You can't make this up.

I don't even need to repeat the how's and why's Olivia obviously got signed to Jack's label TMR. If you been following me for the past 10 years, I went through all that. Search for it on my page if you're interested.

I hope Jesse continues to release music just the way she's been doing it. She is loved. Her concerts alone prove how people adore her. Some of her shows have sold out. She did a wonderful show in Singapore.

Olivia does dive bars and corner stages at diners. She has never stood on a stage at Singapore, not even with TMR backing. lol

Seriously, fuck them all. Fuck the labels. Fuck Jack and fuck TMR.

And if you think this has been the only time Jack ignored or turned down REAL talent, look at Alabama Shakes.

From Jack:

A long time ago, the Alabama Shakes wanted to be on Third Man Records," White said, "and I told them at that time - whatever it was, 2010 or something - I said, 'You know, you guys are really blowing up. I'd rather you go with a major label, because I don't think we're in a place to where we could really handle and support you on this humongous level that you're about to crack into.' And I wouldn't say that now. I would say, 'Yes, definitely, very much so, we're a good place for you to be and probably better than a major label for a band like Alabama Shakes.'

The regret Jack and TMR must have not signing Alabama Shakes! Good for you. It's what you deserve for not signing them. Brittany Howard is a modern day mix of Janis Joplin and Etta James. You'll sign a useless no talent like Olivia Jean but completely ignore REAL RAW TALENT like Brittany Howard and Jesse Jo Stark.

Now TMR sell Alabama Shakes vinyl's at TMR stores.

The cosmic karma of it all.

yuuta exhibits such previously abandoned, recently adopted dog behavior. incredibly anxious all the time, even though nobody’s out to get him or leave him behind. waits for you to return home or from school or from work excitedly, just to see you when you walk through the door. follows you around senselessly, hovering in your space just for the sake of companionship. initiates affection in prodding ways—starts off next to you, then a hand on your thigh, then deems it safe to lay all the way down, then slowly pushes his head into your lap. gets up whenever you need to get up, and resumes his position as soon as you’re ready. brings you gifts as a sign that he’s thinking of you, and maybe because he likes the affection it brings out in you, maybe because he likes the gentle affirming touches of a hand in his hair or a pinch to his cheek. rests his head on your stomach or his chin on your shoulder when he’s sleepy, stays there, immobile, and will not move unless absolutely necessary. sometimes he gets surprised when he hears you calling for him, there’s a moment of disbelief as he thinks ��me? really? you need me?” but it’s very quickly overshadowed by this compulsive need to show up, to please, to do anything for you, which is why he always answers when you call. he doesn’t realize that he has puppygod eyes, especially when he’s excited or confused, but he does and it’s incredible endearing. very reluctant to share your space or attention after a while, considers that to be sacred and he won’t risk being let go or lost again, so as a safety precaution, he keeps himself right by you, waits for you always. 

see I am very disjointed from a lot of nine/ten fandom discourse because I genuinely believe that in a different world where space boy was not to be seen, had an older Rose gone to the hospital and bumped into a certain Doctor Jones by a vending machine or as she was taking Rose’s vitals, she would have instantly hit it off with Martha. and probably flirted with her a little on accident and then on purpose when Martha flirted back

Maybe it's the result of my main fandom for the majority of my life being one where canon just genuinely doesn't exist, where there are so many different canons and literally any sort of interpretation of a single character is correct and can range from a moronic maniac with a chainsaw to a depressed old asshole boss, but

Literally who gives a fuck about canon?

Especially when the character is practically a blank slate or if it's an AU

Like, I'm sorry, but if you're butthurt about a mischaracterisation of a fictional character in an Alternative Universe then I don't think you understand what an AU is

dark will always take up immediate issue with those who mock love or emotion as weak i think. irrational at times? sure, he can agree. sensitive, vulnerable? absolutely; inherently, (as a synonym for sincere,) but the moment someone starts legitimately calling love a weakness or an exposed vein only meant to be punctured and drained from, that's when he starts to get angry. dark, as someone who already bears an inherent callousness and apathy, who knows just how easy it is to be cruel, destructive and belligerent, always admires daisuke for the boy's heart and tender, stubborn emotion. like sugisaki's interview mentions, dark is likely someone who bears continuous witness to and understands just how much intense effort can go into someone doing their best in trying to be kind to others; he thinks that he himself never could, at least not even close to the same way that daisuke steadily tries to maintain. those that would mock or scoff at daisuke's, if not the overall idea of kindness, dark won't hesitate to snap at and call weak, pathetic, or cowardly in return. those who prey on others' feelings and scorn or abuse them aren't proving that kindness is a 'weakness;' they're only fouling good things that could have even otherwise been their own with their own 'malicious crap and garbage.'

i keep looking at posts like "i stopped a binge" "i prevented a binge" and all of them are like. "i waited until the urge went away". buddy. the urge doesn't go away. there's no urge. there's just nothing else to do. i don't have anything else to do. every time i stop eating no matter how long i sit with the feeling or not, i always go for more food because there is genuinely nothing else in my life. nothing is enjoyable anymore. the world sucks. no matter what i force myself to do it's the only positive thing i can ever find.

something’s just not right / there’s hunger in my eyes, but you’re not looking into mine / in the morning light / i wake up next to you, but we’re no longer entwined / i want to love you with a ravenous hunger, tear your flesh into mine / you say you like me, but you’d rather that i listen quiet, keep it all inside / i romanticize a lust for blood and the glint of evil in your eyes / any kind of sign, something to tell me that your heart is burning just like mine / rend me to pieces if that’s what it takes to tell me that i taste divine / there’s something wrong but i just can’t quite place it, leave me on the precipice, i’m fine / something awakening and stirring inside me / i’m gearing up, your pretense in decline / i slice my heart up on a platter and find that you don’t even wanna dine / i gave my soul up, you can eat me raw / diced up and vulnerable, i’m yours to try / you’re glancing to the side, bored, and find that you don’t even wanna dine!!!!

Poppy got invited onto one of Maroon Cartoons sets- somehow... But unfortunately, it's the Roger Rabbit and Baby Herman cartoon set.

Herman: *waking up from a nap and sees Poppy. Immediately chooses violence* "Oh, sorry I'm late, doll, I was waiting for you to make me a sandwich."

Poppy: *glaring harder than she ever has before* "Go back to sleep, and starve."

Once people stop assuming that whichever two random people following each other on Instagram are automatically dating, the world will be a beautiful place.

.

i will never understand centering romance in life i'm sorry

Hey guys. gay rights