Not enough Halstarion out there with an unashamed breeding kink 😳

Time to be the change I want see in world 😩

Hey. Hey what if the reason Jeramie is so obsessed with "reading between the lines" is because with the mask on for most of his life (which is already a LOT of life) his vision was obscured so he wasn't able to see most of the expressions people make and how they move and act and stuff like that, so he had to read between the lines of what people were saying to him to infer what they were doing. Every pause for breath and change in tone had to be taken into account. So for the longest time "reading between the lines" was the only way for him to understand people

when the french planned parenthood (le planning familial) released a series of posters, including this wonderful illustration of a pregnant trans man with the words 'at the planning, we know men can get pregnant too' drawn by transmasculine artist laurier the fox, both him and the org received several waves of sexist and transphobic harassment from terfs and the far right, misgendering him, questioning his reproductive rights, and seeking to enforce traditional gender roles. i know we've been hearing a lot about anti-trans moral panics in the uk and us, but it's sadly happening here too, and the leader of the majority group in parliament even received terfs and voiced her support for them so. yeah.

anyway, a few weeks later, a collective op-ed was published in response to the attacks, signed by feminist activists, celebrities, political leaders and laurier the fox himself. while i was grateful that they chose not to stay silent and made their opposition to transphobia clear, it felt like they didn't understand how this latest moral panic was specifically anti-transmasc, and...it made me kind of sad. don't get me wrong— this did more good than harm, and in a sense, it was meant to address the general transphobia from the last years, but the whole op-ed only mentioning women after bigots had a moral panic over the inclusion of trans men in discussions of reproductive health made me lose it a little

idk i have thoughts about the finale but atm im not sure how to word them beyond hmm? (my tags are full of spoilers so don’t read them if you haven’t seen the finale yet)

me when traumatised fictional sadboy:

wHY must transphobia exist. im going to explode

well besties it would seem that we’re having another strong-armed lady here in my character roster because i just remembered that sanne’s an archer. with a traditional bow, as she famously refuses rifles/guns/crossbows (seriously she considers is beneath her to use a crossbow and will get insanely offended if you even suggest it lmao girl’s got a whole lotta pride)

i don’t know why it took so long for my head to connect the dots but come join the ranks sanne. man she and braham look even more striking now ;-;

...

Well

Mental health took a nosedive just in time for the show

ahahahahaa

....

Needless to say imma need some fluff so gonna take a short break from the angst to do some soft doodles for myself if I can shake my braincage enough.

*wallowing on couch* "hhh I feel terrible this is worst case scenario my anxiety is spiking like none other rn"

*gets up and moves around* "wait no actually I'm completely fine lol"

No because there's size kink and then there's Soobin size kink... you know? He's got NO BUSINESS being that tall and hands and legs and– and– hhhhhhhh

STOP BECAUSE HE’S SO BIG BUT SO GENTLE aside from when he’s got beomgyu on a hit list AND HE LITERALLY WOULDN’T EVEN HAVE TO DO ANYTHING EXTRA TO SEND YOU RIGHT OVER THE EDGE BECAUSE HE’S JUST SO ??? BIG ???

EVERYTHING about him is bigger than you… he could still be so gentle but it would all feel like so much. one finger is enough to bring tears to your eyes. one caress to your throat and you’re seeing stars. size training to help you fit his massive cock into your poor little pussy.. he’s barely even done anything yet and you’re already falling apart on him, big broad bunny and his little pillow princess so dumb on his cock 🤧

soft sex where he’s got you wrapped up in his arms and if someone were to walk in they wouldn’t even see that there was a second person there, because his broad frame covers yours completely as he hovers over you, pulling you close and fucking you so deep. whispering how good you’re taking him and how he’s so proud of you… kisses to your temple and soft, breathless moans in your ear as he feels the way your warm walls suck him in.

and ofc don’t even talk to me about the more passionate sex that has your tongue lolling and eyes rolling just from his pace alone. bouncing you effortlessly up and down on his cock as you’re too fucked out to do anything but moan his name. holding your hips up off the bed in missionary as he thrusts into you, his eyes fixated on the bulge in your tummy and knowing that he’s the one putting it there. fingering you into oblivion as he studies every expression your face makes, and he’s practically drooling while he watches and feels the way your pussy clenches around his long, slender fingers as he pounds them into your cunt just right.

i’ve mentioned this before when they joked about it in their live but soobin’s slaps are no joke and he doesn’t even realize it.. i can imagine his shock when he’s got you ass up, not even fully inside you yet as he gives you a simple spank and you instantly cum right then and there. he didn’t even think he hit you that hard, but you’re gasping and spasming around him just from one spank from his huge ass hand and he’s literally just. the surprised pikachu meme. baby doesn’t know his own strength.. his own size..

leads me into himbo!servicetop!soobin thoughts 😖 just wants to make you feel so so good and he guesses he’s doing it right from the way you’re moaning and writhing underneath him, so he just keeps going, pounding his fat cock into you the way you seem to always like it, panting and whining and grunting as he holds you in place to keep you from jolting up the bed with every thrust. so big and strong and exerting himself till he’s dizzy just to keep those pretty sounds coming out of your mouth as you cum around him over and over and over again. edges himself, overstimulates himself, he doesn’t care — gives it all to you even though he’s so confused about what it is that gets you off so much. he doesn’t understand how big he is and how delicious it feels to you.. doesn’t know why your body responds so intensely when he manhandles you even just a little.. why you could get yourself off just from licking and sucking on his fingers alone.

speaking of sucking, size training your pussy is one thing, but your mouth? holding your hair gently into a ponytail and watching you with his lip between his teeth as he gives little shallow thrusts to your throat, easing you into it, his poor baby’s mouth already completely stuffed and he’s not even halfway in yet :(( also thinking about you going to bestfriend!soob to ask him if you can practice deepthroating on him because you KNOW he must be massive, so who better to ask than him? and his initial spluttering, red-faced shock eventually turns into his legs spread wide with you between them as he melts into the couch, head tipped back against the top of it and jaw slack as he uses your ponytail to bob your head up and down on his cock, his moaning shamelessly loud, not giving a single fuck how messy it is as everything is covered in spit and drool and pre-cum. his cock is just too big, too much for your little throat, and the both of you are obsessed as you gag on it till you can’t breathe.

hard dom, soft dom, switch, sub, no dynamics at all — IT ALL APPLIES W SOOBIN + SIZE KINK 😩

i repeat. soobin is just. so big in every way that he would barely even have to lift a finger to make you never want another man’s cock again.

so you can only imagine what it must be like with what we know of soobin: that he’s competitive, and he always puts in the work.

If you're easily queasy, especially about bugs, skip this please

I feel like we need more words to describe what goes on inside our heads. Like, I have a bug trap in my room and I frequently think about putting the dead bugs and larvae in my mouth -- but it's not "think about" because that implies that on some level I *want* to do this. People think about buying that expensive thing, I think about starting a tiktok, etc. The thought is awful and disgusting and makes me want to throw up, but it seems like every term we have for describing "this is the image currently in my mind" implies that I want that image to be there.

I just wish there was a succinct term for "this concept is in my head, it is actively distressing and I wish it would leave." I know you could say "I'm having intrusive thoughts about this," but if the person you're talking to isn't read up on the lingo/well versed in psychiatry, they're not gonna know what that means. And I'm not sure if this even counts as intrusive thoughts!!!

I just want to be able to say to my coworker "I'm blargling about bugs in and around my mouth again" so she'd distract me so I don't have to deal with that. The English dictionary has ~500,000 entries and that is not enough. We need more, especially around ourselves.

Shhhhhhoot, actually now I have to add another letter for next week’s round of posts

What about.. aliens and neurodivergents?

Like, they find out about body language, and facial expressions, and sayings, and all of that stuff. And the amount of poisons we drink for fun. And they're weirded out. And the humans don't know how to explain it, because they don't know any other.

Then the aliens meet neurodivergents. And at first they're like, wtf there are humans who don't understand humans? But then they realise, oh wait, these 'weird' humans can explain the 'normal' ones. And they start calling the neurodivergents 'h-w', 'humans weird'. So they talk about neurotypicals. And someone bring up how we poison ourselves for fun. And the neurodivergent is like, "Oh yeah, caffeine doesn't work on me, and I need like a whole wine bottle to get even tipsy and like six sigarettes for the nicotine to work but I had weed once and I got like wicked high instantly" and the alien is like wtf you're h-w you're supposed to be normal by galactic standards???

And say, the Kgrifu ship Hashalaiy has eight humans, which is almost the permitted maximum of ten, and only one of the eight are neurodivergent, and they tend to mask in public, even if the other humans aren't around. They usually turn down human applications but then they get one that states 'h-w, strong by human standards, frequently non-verbal' and they decide yes, let's hire this one, they're h-w, and if they're strong by human standards, they must be wicked-strong by galactic standards.

And this human, Bridge they call themself, introduces themselves to the other humans. The aliens look on with intrigue. Bridge keeps their eyes on the ground, talks softly, and fidgets with their sleeves. Seven of the other humans look them up and down, frown, and don't give them a second thought. The other h-w, though. Earth, her name is. She looks at them with curiousity, and exitement. When Bridge is done talking, Earth slowly walked towards them. She doesn't make eye-contact, like she usually does. "Autistic?" She asks in a soft voice. Bridge looks up, nods enthusiastically. Earth breaks out in a large grin. "ADHD with a side of OCD, on my side." The aliens don't know what those words mean. Then Bridge's expression changes slightly, and it isn't an expression any of the Kgrifu's know, but Earth immediatly replies verbally by saying "It's Earth."

The aliens observe Earth and Bridge interact the next few weeks. They're almost always around eachother, and barely talk to communicate. When they do talk, it's usually Earth- Bridge has said maybe a total of 20 sentences while around Earth, and usually they only really use one word. Rather than words, they use the 'body language' Earth claimed not to know, a few words from something called 'sign language' (an entire language of hand-movements!), simple noises such as hums, and, suprisingly.. touch. Earth will tap Bridge's right shoulder twice, or Bridge will run their fingers through Earth's hair (humans only have fur in four or five places on their bodies, and the fur on their heads are ridiculously long), and the both of them will recognise this as communication.

One time, ensign Ririfé sees/overhears (pretty much the same thing for xe's species) one of the 'normal' humans, Pietro, xe thinks his name is, look at such a non-verbal conversation with annoyance. Earth hums a specific melody, something best written as 'hmm-hmm-hmm-hhhhhhhh-hmm?', and then Bridge cocks their head to the left. Earth responds by doing a kind of half-shrug with one shoulder and saying "Tomorrow". Bridge thinks for a second before shrugging. Pietro calls out, saying: "Hey! Talk out loud, would ya!" This gets an identifiably 'angry' look from Earth, pointedly directed at Pietro, whereas Bridge, a large, muscular human, basically shrinks into themselves. Earth angles her head towards the door and looks back at Bridge. Without words exchanged, they leave. Pietro looks even more annoyed and goes over to his 'friends' (a human word for a non-biologically related pack consisting of humans (or other, sometimes!) of the general same age). Ririfé rushes to go tell the captain.

Alternatively, the aliens brand neurodivergents as the normal ones, and neurotypicals as the oddballs. The neurotypicals do not know how to handle this. I don't feel like writing a whole story for that right now but if you like the idea you should tell me.

Feel free to add on to this btw!

genuine genuine genuine question- wwwhy do you not like the zonai? (zonau? not sure if thats like. the worlds coolest plural or a translation difference) given your content with more monstery designs i would have thought they'd be up your alley!! however. i have also not played skyward sword (as much as id like to) and i know most of peoples upset with their existence and the totk storyline is because of its conflicts with that plot? i'm very excited to see what you do with your rewrite/botw2!! given their slight presence in faron in botw, it would be cool to see you repurpose the zonai in some way that doesn't conflict with the plot you're going for, something that makes more sense with the cryptic kinda bare minimum we had in botw? sorry if you've explained your stance on the zonai before <3

hhhhhhhh i had ranted alot about it but i hope you are prepared- (also "zonai" is sonau in german but im choosing to write it with a z so people recognize it at least, im pretty sure zonau is also the orignal japanese word for them)

i am fine with their design, in fact, i LIKE their character designs, however i dont like everything else about them.

and no its also not bc it affects skyward sword bc it doesnt affect ANYTHING in skyward sword, bc skyward sword is the VERY FIRST zelda game in the timeline and totk is nowhere near it, totk draws several paralels towards skysw bc its meant a sort of soft reset for this new era but its really just thematic overlap and references bc those are cool (i know alot of people are trying to convince the entire fandom that totk somehow is crammed into the old timeline but trust me its never anywhere near confirmed nor does it make any sense, heres the lil graphic i made last month to clarify how i think its meant to be understood .. quite obviously even -

i dont mean to sound .. mean, but some people read too much into little phrases or references to older titles (like first king of hyrule .. doesnt have to mean the literal firstest of the first ones in all of forgotten history ever, just the first of THIS hyrule for example), and while im not against theories i am very annoyed when people try to say its somehow canon when its NOT)

with that out of the way;

i dont like how they are 'integrated' into botws world, they feel unnatural and shoved in everywhere, they have been everywhere and did everythign better and cooler and no part of (this) hyrule was untouched by them their architecture feels not integrated well either and design wise its rather bland, while the sheikah shrines for example while obviously not natural and very 'techy' they still build a harmonizing contrast while the totk shrines are pretty laughably unfitting compared to them the basically complete disappearance of all sheikah tech related stuff bothers me immensely bc why would you just get rid of it istead of developing it further (i know about purahs towers and think they are just like a worse version of the previous ones; and before this argument comes up again, them destryoing it all -somehow- bc they were afraid of it being taken over again is a dumb excuse bc then they should be even more scared of zonau tech- even MORE unknown and advanced tech literally falling from the sky) you could have done SO MUCH with the ancient shiekah tech it drives me nuts

i also think it tipped the delicate balance of the kinda medival setting + high tech that botw had set up compeltely over, the zonau tech just .. is so painfully obviously only the way it is to give you little lego parts to glue together (i know its a focus of the game ... or at least the gamePLAY but it could have been done better, again i think they managed the balance perfectly with shiekah tech, its weird and isnt natural but doesnt endanger the believability of it ... the zonau tech just throws that out the window rly ... how cool would it have been if you could built lil guardian walk thingies djknhfkd )

in general they just feel like a complete replacement for the ancient shiekah and are so SO desperately trying to make the zonau the COOLER and BETTER versions of what the shiekah were (you COULD have connected them in a cool way, like there being ancient shiekah labs build in the old zonau mining facilities bc they used zonau tech as basis for their own tech etc)

like instead of building on the set up and potential botw had prepared, they just scrambled to make a 'better' version of botw, like oh no forget THAT ancient civilization we have an EVEN MORE ancient, and EVEN MORE highly developed peoples there that were also everywhere before you but also were never really hinted at- and then repeat botws structure .__.

having an old and forgotten civilization of whom only some withered ruins remain gave botw a much more real feeling, a world with a history that you will never know (you know, bc that makes it intriguing and is just .. a good choice of worldbuilding imo)- and then totk comes along and reveals everything and also nothing, we know too much of them to be intrigued by their mystery and also not enough to actually care about them (also them beign presented as the good perfectly perfectestest kingdom of light that can do no wrong other than underestimate the eeeevil guy while they also had their hands on every part of the land and made all other races be their face and nameless servants just ... thats weird man!! i know its a game, even if its only aimed at kids my god they arent stupid either!! you really present me with that and expect me to take it at face value what argh)

again i think they COULD have been integrated into it, but the way it was done completely threw me off, im not mad about them EXISTING but about how it was DONE in the game

the way they were done robs not just totk but also botw of mystery and intrigue, for example i much rather had them stay a mystery, only ever talked about in some text and some old and almost completely withered ruins left, you never get so see what happened there in the past, you can only guess, but you have to deal with the fallout anyway and thats just ONE possibility, there are so many and it feels like they chose the most boring one every single time

sometimes knowing less is better than knowing half

(maybe i can make it clearer when .. or if i can get to illustrate what could have worked -in my opinion- better .... sorry for ranting again ;__; )

Hhhhhhhh more Hermie thoughts. I think the difference in s2 deaths for me is something like this, as articulate as I can make myself right now. With Terry Jr., there was some expectancy that we’d probably see him again. It had already been set up that the dead will ‘return’ in that they’re very easy to visit with some quick realm hopping. My feelings towards this was that I was unsure if I wanted to be able to see him again because of it being too late for Scary to make up with him properly and never seeing him again would really cement this. I do like that they got a moment together in Hell, and it was necessary to happen in terms of all the Daddy Magic memory collection, but all the same it’s too late for Scary to make things right with Terry in a ‘normal’ way.

With Hermie, I genuinely don’t expect to ever see him again. It’s been set up that permadeath exists. The void. Nothing and nowhere.

Hermie is chronologically two years old. He was created out of a scam, nothing of love. He was dropped into reality as a joke (literally and meta-wise). Nobody has ever loved or cared for him, and that’s only made more known to him the more he learns about his birth parents.

And then here’s Normal. Nobody really knows Hermie, but Normal sees him. Normal may fall victim to the constant oops-Hermie-is-here-we-forgot, but he does his best to make space for him and include Hermie, even if a good chunk of that time is alongside romantic feelings. It’s still recognition.

But in the end, none of that matters. Because Hermie is just an NPC. An NPC that the DM doesn’t even care too much about, despite how interwoven he became with the plot and gets dragged along. He’s important but at the same time he never mattered. In Anthony’s own words from Teen Talk 2-46, Hermie is a free kill because it does nothing to affect the podcast. And he hates Hermie because “he isn’t Paeden.”.

The said the entire next episode is just about the fact that he died. Hermie’s finally getting the attention he so desperately craved but would never receive, but now he’s not here to even see it. And after that? When they’re done being sad about Hermie for one episode? He’ll probably be barely brought up ever again, just like always. Except this time it’s because he no longer exists and never will again.

And that kills me.