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samufigueiredo · 10 months

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The dangers of longing for the picturesque - A Secret History Review

Just finished reading The Secret History and can’t help but be stuck thinking about the pursuit of aesthetic. It quite saddens me that the very obvious moral of this novel gets so easily lost at times, and the idea of finishing it and going back to my life of aesthetic pursuit sounds dreadful but expectable in this imagery fill age of quick dopamine.

I could make an extensive review solely complimenting the terrific writing of Donna Tartt and her plot construction, but I feel that to fall into the mistake of staying merely on the picturesque level and not drive into the base ideas entranced into it would be a massive disservice to the author. So instead, I will be exploring a bit of my personal relationship with this book and why I find it a valuable read.

“It has always been hard for me to talk about Julian without romanticizing him. In many ways, I loved him the most of all; and it is with him that I am most tempted to embroider, to flatter, to basically reinvent. I think that is because Julian himself was constantly in the process of reinventing the people and events around him, conferring kindness, or wisdom, or bravery, or charm, on actions which contained nothing of the sort. It was one of the reasons I loved him: for that flattering light in which he saw me, for the person I was when I was with him, for what it was he allowed me to be” (p. 576)

My entire life I feel like I have been constructing intricate characters of which the skin I can dress myself with, representing a capsule of ideas and values and how I desire to translate these to the exterior. My own name has been chosen on the basis of a character that could represent everything I wish I would be, as well as everything I wish I wasn’t nicely accompanied by people to love me for it anyways. As a queer person who grew up surrounded by social media and mental health issues, I often regard my life as an endless performance. Even my love for reading started as an attempt to be more like the people who read around me – I feel in love with the act of reading before I can remember falling in love with a book itself.

“Though Julian could be marvelously kind in difficult circumstances of all sorts, I sometimes got the feeling that he was less pleased by kindness itself than by the elegance of the gesture.” (p. 539)

If I search my memory well enough, I can find some vivid memories of playing dress up and makeover games in primary school. This was done with a notebook on the side, so I could make notes of everything I did to the animations and be able to do the same to myself later on. These lists of things I would do before the new year, new month, new week, were not just beauty centered. In my mind they translated into making friends, being positively perceived, having good grades and above else just having a clue of what I was doing and enjoying myself while doing it.

These lists become a ever present friend while I was growing up, and the act would be repeated in different media. The mannerisms of the beautiful and interesting character that was loved by everyone else, the Instagram account from which I saved pictures so I could inspire myself later, the Tumblr thread full off books that I must read no matter how much I lacked interest in some, the Pinterest albums that represented how I wished to be perceived in the coming year, and so on.

“I had spent dozens of hours studying the photographs as though if I stared at them long enough and longingly enough I would, by some sort of osmosis, be transported into their clear, pure silence. Even now I remember those pictures, like pictures in a storybook one loved as a child." (p.10)

I learned how to present myself and how to translate how I wanted to be perceived into aesthetic ideals before I could even quite grasp what those ideals meant, and until this day I have a hard time letting go of this desire for image base simplification.

“Viewed from a distance, his character projected an impression of solidity and wholeness which was in fact as insubstantial as a hologram; up close, he was all motes and light, you could pass your hand right through him. If you stepped back far enough, however, the illusion would click in again and there he would be, bigger than life, squinting at you from behind his little glasses and raking back a dank lock of hair with one hand. A character like his disintegrates under analysis. It can only be denned by the anecdote, the chance encounter or the sentence overheard.” (p. 438)

The morbid longing for the picturesque at all costs (p. 5) is culturally ingrained in us, and in the present, it can be interesting to consider what role does social media and image based websites have on this. We are all increasingly longing for outer beauty and constructing and shifting aesthetic ideals, so we can chase them and feel in control of how we are perceived and what our life is made of. But we often forgot that we also need to fill the shell itself. These aesthetics can be fun and even empowering at times, but on their own they will not make us fulfilled, they will fail in giving us a sense of community as well as one of individuality. And above all, they leave us with a sore taste in our mouths and a sense of disappointment, because the more we attempt to find fulfillment in them, the more we feel like the failure is in ourselves – the aesthetic is not the right one or we are not letting ourselves fall into it enough – and not in the chase itself.

“'After all, the appeal to stop being yourself, even for a little while, is very great,' he said. 'To escape the cognitive mode of experience, to transcend the accident of one's moment of being. (…) . But one mustn't underestimate the primal appeal – to lose one's self, lose it utterly. And in losing it be born to the principle of continuous life, outside the prison of mortality and time.” (p. 182)

And when does it stop? When does the disconnect become too striking to be ignored any longer? When does the romanization start to make the thing itself rotten and disappointing and how do we avoid that? When do we stop and recognize that just because we are deeply absorbed by this road it does not mean we should keep following it?

“There is nothing wrong with the love of Beauty. But Beauty – unless she is wed to something more meaningful – is always superficial. It is not that your Julian chooses solely to concentrate on certain, exalted things; it is that he chooses to ignore others equally as important.” (p. 577)

The imaginary world, the picturesque and its beauty, can be tremendous tools in driving through the madness of the real world. But on itself they are not enough, we need to find fulfillment in reality, and love in presence.

#the secret history #donna tartt #booklover #book review #dark academia #aestethic #academia aesthetic #secret history quotes #romantizing life #escapism

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zorkaya-moved · 2 years

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HON.KAI IMPACT VERSE CENTERED !

After learning of the secrets behind PE Herrschers and CE Herrschers, I want to state how Zarina was able to ‘regain’ her humanity. In all reality, she did not. The moment she turned into a Herrscher, she was only able to withstand the urge to kill and destroy everything because her grief was far stronger and her innate talent in control over her mind/emotions played a huge role, but it did not erase everything. If anything, the thoughts that this world means nothing and it should just die out never left her mind.

Unlike others Herrschers, the moment of clarity was always followed by insane struggles with pain and control regaining. The only reason for Zarina to survive and return to her clarity was because of Mobius’ experimentation. As Sokolova was caught alive and in her moments of clarity was telling to use her to push forward the fight against Honkai, even if it meant using her as a tool.

It’s important to underline that Mobius’ experiments were far more ruthless than anything she’s ever done before. From testing how far a Herrscher body can handle to extracting the core without fully killing her off. You can say that for days and days, the screams never stopped in the snake’s laboratory as the experimentations would continue until Mobius would walk out to speak that she had done everything she could to figure out as much information as possible regarding Herrschers. She also stated that surprisingly Zarina survived them all and it seemed like the hell-breaking experiments actually brought clarity to her instead of fully making her shatter as a human being.

People like Elysia have visited her several times as Mobius put her in an anti-Honkai field, rendering her to remain there as a test subject and to keep her for future possible experimentations. The additional problems came after the experimentations as well, Zarina continued to struggle with her own clarity and her own [self] for many days if not weeks, meaning that her memories have been jumbled up and recalling certain events caused her immense pain. There were many people she did not recognize or remember due to what happened. It also affected her view of the world quite a lot, forcing her to lose a sense of time and lose an understanding of what it means to be a human (she regained it in the current era only partially), and he fully and completely lost the ‘human lives are valuable’ mindset that existed somewhere before her turn. Aponia has placed several Disciplines on Zarina post Mobius’ experimentations, specifically: do not harm humanity, do not join Honkai, and follow Elysia’s hope.

In the CE, Zarina is able to easily absorb the HoI core because it’s far more flexible as the story states and she has fully repressed anything and everything that could’ve been given out with Ana’s core such as her memories and regrets, instead overwriting them with ‘you were just too weak if this is what made you lose your mind.’ Basically, her ruthlessness and her merciless nature has been amped up a lot. Only certain characters, upon plotting, are able to keep her humanity in check and keep her from fully turning into a beast. As an example, Sophie’s Fu Hua is the person who was able to return her to the closest she’s been to her ‘human’ self.

#❄ ― HEADCANONS. ╱ the cold，pure flame of conquering is what I was destined for.#❅ 𝐕. HONKAI ⤻ force the darkness to obey the world，mock so called gods for wishing to eradicate humanity. ❞

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 2 years

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Hey raven, do you think in future stories we may see more angst or at least back story with Kalim? I know he's our resident sunshine character but beyond being somewhat naive, with all the assassinations and other potential tragedies throughout his life, I wouldn't be surprised if we found out kalim's constant happiness was his own way of coping with it.

But I may be wrong, what are your thoughts or Headcannons about future development with Kalim?

Before the release of chapter 4, a popular fan theory floating around was that Kalim has a secret evil side, but now we can see he's just ashldbbasiydbaiodbsa sunshine lad 😂 Now I believe it's a popular belief that Kalim's happiness is how he deals with the constant assassination attempts, but I also think part of it is that's just how Kalim's personality is. Having grown up extremely privileged, he can afford to live and spend carefreely, and that plays into how he developed his coping methods.

***Main story spoilers below the cut!***

I think a good route for character development for Kalim would be centered around him recognizing that that not everyone is able to live as lavishly as he does (maybe even spurring him to be motivated to do charity work beyond just donating money; really getting up in there and roughing it with his own hands). He kind of got a start with that in chapter 4 when Jamil reveals how unhappy he is having to constantly cater to Kalim and the Asims. There's a divide between the working class and the wealthy, and Kalim should be more cognizant of it if he wishes to reconcile properly with Jamil.

I personally want to see more interactions between him and Ruggie, who comes from the other extreme end of the social ladder. Leona, another rich character, once commented that he thought Ruggie's home was a doghouse when he first saw it because it looked so unkempt and worn down. It's definitely a far cry from the palace he's used to lounging around in. However, I think that Kalim has more capacity to empathize with Ruggie's situation compared to Leona, and seeing just how "the other half" lives can be a valuable experience for Kalim and his growth.

As he learns more about the world, it would also be cool to see Kalim actually learn how to be independent. He relies far too much on Jamil for basic things like being reminded to wake up on time or to make his meals and can't seem to do those things himself (compared to Leona, who has Ruggie take care of him out of laziness). Kalim's also too impulsive with his desires and doesn't realize how much trouble he is making for those around him by acting mainly based on what he thinks is best or would be the most fun (like the time he dragged Idia, an extreme introvert, to a meal, or all the times he asked Jamil to organize banquets for him).

He is used to a certain lifestyle where he gets everything he wants and everyone acts as he wills them to, so Kalim just assumes "this is the norm, and this is how things will always be". This is the perfect set up for him to have that view challenged, questioned, and even shattered (as we see in chapter 5 when Kalim ends up not being picked as a lead performer). It propels Kalim to pick up the pace and push himself to try harder and actually apply himself instead of relying on others to fix his messes or lack of skill for him. That's along the lines of what I want to see for Kalim going forward.

So basically, chapter 4 started a character arc with Kalim, chapter 5 kind of continued it, and I like the direction it's going, but I think it could be explored in greater detail. I hope that in learning more about people outside of his mega wealthy bubble can expand Kalim's worldview, make him more sympathetic to the plights and the limited wallets of the common man, and how to look after himself.

#Kalim Al-Asim #Ruggie Bucchi #Leona Kingscholar #Idia Shroud #Jamil Viper #Scarabia #notes from the writing raven #spoilers

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blackradandmad · 3 years

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why blippi is rotting yr children's brains

preface: i literally expect no one to read this. it is an essay length, strong opinion piece critiquing a niche youtube-based children's show that i don't expect most of y'all to even have knowledge of lol. but like, i promise that even if you know nothing about what i'm talking about, in my incredibly, super humble opinion, it's a good piece of writing and interesting nonetheless. anyway if you read this whole thing for some reason yr really hot and we should kiss.

i thoroughly vet everything my child watches before he watches it, episode by episode. and we rarely watch youtube for entertainment; we usually just look up educational videos when he has a question about something and wants more detail than i can provide him. and that's mainly because children's content on youtube is so fucking troubling and distressing. i don't judge parents who give their children a tablet at a restaurant at all bc i've been there and sometimes it's easier on everyone to just put on a video and avoid a giant scene, but i do judge parents who just leave their children alone with youtube kids on autoplay.

take stevin john, a literal millionaire who got famous from dressing up as a silly character called blippi and going on tours of places like aquariums, zoos, construction sites, etc and posting it on youtube. this has branched into a whole empire of blippi videos, hulu shows and specials, live shows and tours (that he outsources to another character actor), merchandise and so on. this 30-something year old man cites his main influence as being mr. rogers, but i question if he's ever even seen an episode of that program.

mr. rogers had no background in early childhood development or media production, but he revolutionized the world of children's media, because he respected his audience and didn't shy away from real world situations, all while creating a show with an enormous heart. mr. rogers begins his episodes by inviting the viewer in, literally changing his attire to be more comfortable, and talking about/doing things he genuinely cares about. whereas mr. rogers calmly and maturely addresses the viewer, blippi puts on a high pitched, contrived voice, interjecting every other sentence with a forced exclamation such as, "teehee! we're having so much fun!"

i don't find it a coincidence that john (blippi) is a veteran, either. his videos are completely devoid of the absurd, abstract, childlike thinking that makes children's media fun, creative, and entertaining. his thinking and process is methodical, devoid of emotion, and very superficial. this line of thinking clearly shows the kind of creative sterilization and emphasis on sameness and conformity instilled in the military. blippi simply observes things and interacts with them in a stale, matter-of-fact way. "this ball is purple! this ball is pink! anyway... what's over there? teehee! a car! vroom, vroom!" objects are colors, toy cars don't do anything but drive, curiosity is simply not encouraged.

he uses the "it's educational!" excuse to hide the fact that his show lacks everything that makes media a valuable resource for children to consume in the first place. further than identifying colors, numbers, and the occasional letter or shape, there is just this total lack of children's need for social and emotional development. when mr. rogers breaks the fourth wall to address the viewer and let them know they're special, it feels authentic and natural, because we've spent the last half hour building whole worlds with diverse characters and unique stories in a pretend neighborhood, learning about and enjoying different musical instruments, being exposed to and making friends with (even if parasocially, it is still a real bond to children when done properly) children who are similar to us in character regardless of physical or environmental differences, feeding the fish, making art together, and so on. when blippi tells the viewer, "you are very special, and i enjoy spending time with you!" it falls completely flat and feels unearned, because the last half hour was spent running around a soft play center pointing at bright, colorful objects, visiting interesting locations like farms or fruit production factories while failing to acknowledge the humanity of the humans actually working there (everything is machine or product focused; the human workers are simply an extension of the machine), learning "fun facts" about elephants that just list attributes of elephants, not taking the opportunity to inform the viewers of elephants' intelligence, or diet, or matriarchal society. it is a loud, sensory overwhelming display of a man so disconnected from the social and emotional needs and desires of children that he assumes they're stupid, easily entertained idiots who only need some silly dances and fast-moving cartoon graphics to give their attention (meaning time and desire to purchase products meaning $$$). john clearly views his audience as a means to gaming the algorithm and ultimately a paycheck by the hollow way he addresses them.

the show is so narcissistic, so focused on all the fun blippi is supposedly having, but he lacks any of the character traits that make individual children's show hosts memorable, so much so that he was able to have someone else who doesn't even vaguely resemble him dress as blippi and impersonate him and host the show or appear at live shows, and it went unnoticed by most of his toddler and child audience. the show is so formulaic and the character of blippi is so unmemorable that instead of taking the blue's clues route of developing a story of the host leaving for college and his brother now stepping in, or making some sort of believable excuse for the change in actors, they can simply swap him out with some random guy and not acknowledge it at all. although a comedy show for older children, the amanda show in no way could or would try to replicate the show with the same name but swapping out amanda bynes with a random teenage girl who is clearly not amanda bynes. it's weird and nonsensical and shows that his character is so much of a farce put on for a paycheck that not even his dedicated audience is affected or even cares when he is replaced by a random, unknown person.

this is completely garbage content made by an opportunist with no experience with children who saw his nephew watching children's youtube content, took it at complete surface level and still hasn't realized that while children's content only looks and feels so easy, entertaining, and enriching because it is so hard to do well. even with outsourcing his music, that aspect of the show still sucks. famous and successful children's musician, raffi, is known for his song describing the life of a little white whale, called "baby beluga." it opens with a calm strumming of his guitar, followed by the lyrics, "baby beluga in the deep blue sea/swim so wild and you swim so free/heaven above/sea below/and a little white whale on the go." is it silly and kind of pointless? yes, but the point is that he is captivating children and showing them the fun of listening to music, dancing, singing, and appreciating art. the "excavator song" featured in an episode of blippi about construction vehicles opens with what sounds like a default garageband loop and the flatly sung lyrics, "i'm an excavator/i'm an excavator/hey dirt, see you later/i'm an excavator." i don't feel i have to meticulously analyze the aforementioned lyrics; the stark contrast should speak for itself.

i have a million more criticisms about both blippi specifically and youtube children's content as a whole, but this is already so long and i doubt many people will get this far anyway. it's an issue i was completely apathetic towards until i had my own child and had to wean him off these kinds of junk food shows because i realized the fast-paced visuals and bright colors and repetitive songs/lyrics were putting him in this spaced-out, fugue state, and he thought he could demand this show or that show whenever he wanted. the moment he started regularly yelling things like, "watch! cars!" or "no! click it!" i knew i had to be a lot more invested in the things he watched even if just for entertainment or as a soothing message. i showed him an episode of mr. rogers yesterday and feared it would be too slow to hold his attention, but he was mesmerized, greeting and interacting with mr. rogers verbally, asking me, "what's that?" to different objects on the screen. since purging this low-brow children's entertainment, he has had a noticeable increase in attention span and concentration, can focus on a task for longer amounts of times, is more likely to "read"/look through books without me initiating it, and doesn't throw a fit when the tv/my laptop is off.

i just know that for me, growing up with so much unsupervised internet access definitely led me to real-world pain and consequences, and it seems like now children are born with an iphone as an extension of their arm. if my child is going to be consuming videos, i'm definitely supervising every second and am going to be highly critical of the videos and the credentials (or lack thereof) of the creators and team behind it. but i also know, from pure observation admittedly, that parents letting youtube kids autoplay parent their children for hours at a time is not an uncommon occurrence. and it worries me that a generation of children are being raised on videos that rely on being as loud and bright and superficially enjoyable as possible. what's the use of a child knowing their colors and alphabet if they don't know how to treat people with kindness and empathy and respect? there is something wrong for a children's show host to plug the spelling of his name at the end of his videos ("well, that's the end of this video. but if you wanna watch more of my videos, just type in my name! can you spell my name with me? b-l-i-p-p-i!") after essentially rotting his audiences' brains for a half hour. there's something so insidious about the prioritization of naming different parts of construction vehicles over honest depictions of and conversations about dealing with feelings, or why someone with autism may act differently than you, or what to do when you feel lonely, or ways to make art and express yrself creatively. also, not to mention the blatant police propaganda and outright worship is seriously jarring; as a black mother to a visibly non-white child, i cannot sit there and watch blippi show kids how to be a bootlicker for the shittiest profession on earth, but that could be a whole essay in and of itself.

anyway, thanks for reading, if yr looking for quality children's content, i recommend, in no specific order: mr. rogers, sesame street, the electric company, molly of denali, daniel tiger, bluey!, blue's clues, the odd squad, word party, trash truck, puffin rock, uhh... that's definitely not an extensive list but that's just off the dome!!! ok bye y'all <333

#lil rambles #long post t #idk why it's formatted like this ig cos i copy pasted from my fb?#whatever anyway idk why i waste my writing skills on shit literally nobody else but me cares abt #blippi #children's television

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honeypirate · 3 years

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In Madness lies Sanity

Ushijima Wakatoshi x Reader - College AU

Based off the bit by Allan Watts. I read the transcript and I thought— Ushijima in love with his best friend listening to this talk about love in one of his classes and realizing that he needs to tell them the truth. Allan watts bit is in blue, the fic is in white.

Ushijima wasn’t one to dwell too long on trivial matters. He works through them and then forgets them. He focuses on what is important and what will bring him closer to his desired future. He isn’t one who is sucked into madness and drama, he has a strong level head and it’s something he takes pride in. So he’s trying to apply his ideas to how he handles his feelings for you, is it trivial? Is it important to tell you? He was struggling before he walked into class Monday morning and had his eyes opened by the video played during lecture.

- I’m going to talk to you about a particularly virulent and dangerous form of divine madness which is called falling in love. Which is, from a practical point of view, one of the most insane things you can do, or that can happen to you. Because in the eyes of a given woman or a given man, an opposite who go to the eyes of everybody else a perfectly plain and ordinary person can appear to be God or Goddess incarnate .... And this is an extraordinary disruptive experience a subversive experience in the conduct of human affairs

You were never a plain and ordinary person to him and he believes that’s where it got confused. He always has and always will see you as an extraordinary individual, regardless of things that may be seen as flaws or imperfections, regardless of your mistakes. You didn’t transform from one thing to the next, you were the same angel he knew, so when his heart flipped from friendship to love, he wasn’t paying attention.

- Because you never know when it will strike off for what reason. It’s something like contracting a very chronic disease once you get into it

If anyone asked Ushijima who his best friend is his first thought is you. His first thought thought is always you. His constant. His true best friend who is there for him through anything. He’ll open his mouth and say “y/n is my best friend” and when people would point out just how close they are he just shrugged, weren’t friends supposed to be close?

When he thinks back now, now that his feelings are obvious, he realizes that it was just a matter of time until he fell in love with you. He can pinpoint every moment along his life where love was obvious, every joke and hug that at the time he thought was just nice, when he loaned you his sweatshirt and then didn’t wash it because it smelled like you. When he would spend all his valuable and limited free time with you just because he liked the way you would smile as he walked you home. He thinks back to all of his dates in high school and college, of the dating app conversations he’s had or blind dates his friends had set up, and they all failed because of one simple reason- none of them were you.

- I would like to make some reflections on this particular form of madness, and to raise again a very disturbing question. And this disturbing question is as follows: Is it only when you are in love with another person that you see them as they really are? And in the ordinary way, when you are not in love with people you see only a fragmented version of that being.

He’s spent hours turned to days to weeks as he keeps thinking about whether or not he loves you or if he just thinks he could because of how close you already are. He’s lost track of time connecting different dots and making different lists and theories, replaying you’re entire friendship back in his head. He’s thought about the times he saw you drunk in college and puking on his shoes as he helps you home, when you decided you wanted to try and longboard and turfed it so bad your arm was gashed from wrist to elbow and he had carried you to the urgent care. all your reckless and crazy ideas you dragged him along with, you were almost as bad as tendou but he just wanted to take care of you as best as he could. He can feel the desire in his bones to make sure you were always taken care of, a feeling he knows he’ll have until he dies.

He thinks about when you had dated Oikawa and for the entire three months he had an ulcer but didn’t know why. He thought it was because of his pain relievers and quit them the week you broke up with him, not realizing the connection. When he’d get acid in his throat when you talked about dating someone else, he thought he just needed some milk. How blind he had been.

-Because when you are in love with someone you do indeed see them as a divine being. And suppose that’s what they are truly. And your eyes have by your beloved been opened in which case your beloved is serving to you as a kind of guru. An initiator. And that is why there is a form of sexual yoga, based on the idea that man and woman are to each other as mutual guru and student. And through a tremendous outpouring of psychic energy in total devotion and worship to this other person who is respectively the goddess of the god.

Being someone’s best and closest friend consisted of seeing their entirety and choosing to stay and love them anyway. To care for them. He can’t say for certain where he crossed over into love, into wanting to hug you and kiss you, wanting to be the only one you think about, but there’s not much he can do about it now and he doesn’t want to.

Ushijima sees you. He sees your good and your bad and everything in between, he sees you for you. Your ordinary mundane ways of life that he can’t help but want to share with you. Grocery shopping, library trips, post office runs, he wants them all to be done with you. He truly cannot imagine anyone else taking that spot in his heart.

Wanting to show you what he sees. What he knows to be true about you. he wants to scream from the rooftops how amazing you are and he’s not a very loud person. He sees the way you care for your friends selflessly and give and give all you have just so that others can be happy and you never complain. You do what you can when you can and still have time to take care of yourself he never knew how you did it so effortlessly, even when you’d vent to him you never regretted helping others.

He sees the way you lift up those around you. How you leave everyone a little more positive than before you talked to them. He doesn’t know how you do it. He’s convinced you’re an angel and he’s dying to show you just how amazing he knows you are. But he doesn’t want to ruin your friendship. He sees your entirety, your full book instead of just the cover, and he wouldn’t have it any other way. He wanted to give you this energy and receive it in turn and he’s never been so absolutely terrified.

-You realize by total fusion and contact with the other organism. You go down to the divine center in them and it bounces back and you discover your own or you could put it in this way which is another aspect of it that by falling in love and regarding falling in love not just as a sort of sexual infatuation, because it’s always more than that, isn’t it. I mean you can have a great sexual enjoyment with a pleasant friend, you know. But you may do so simply because he or she appeals to your aesthetic senses. But when you fall in love, it’s a much more serious involvement, you just cannot forget this person. You feel miserable when not in their presence, you’re always yearning, that’s get to see more of each other let’s get together that’s we’re completely entangled and then you see you’ve actually kind of out what I would call spiritual element has been introduced. And the Hindus were sensible enough to realize that this was a means of awakening, enlightenment, and therefore it was. Surrounded. With a sort of rigid religious ritual meditative art, with a form of sexual yoga that is designed to allow the feeling of mutual love to the extent of grand passion to have an extremely fitting fulfillment and expression.

Ushijima has always thought you were beautiful. Any human with eyes would think that. But your beauty and attraction went far deeper than that. Sure he’s had fleeting thoughts about how good you looked in a dress but he never let them linger. It felt wrong to think of you like that. But now that he’s an adult, a grown man and not a teenager anymore, he wants to kiss you, to hold your hand, maybe more but it wasn’t about that. It was about the intimacy, the closeness, the vulnerability.

Awakening. Enlightenment. Two words that before he didn’t really think about. But now he feels changed. Now that he’s realized how much he loves you has lifted his spirits, made him dream of the passion and happiness you could have together. He feels himself slipping into the joy of being in love with his best friend and imagining all the ways that love could grow. He feels only half of himself when he’s without you, always needing to see you or be around you, but you never made him feel clingy or bad. You met him in kind, telling him how much you wanted to be around him too.

At first he thought that this love was a trivial thing, something he could push from his mind, but after his weeks of thought he knows this is a lot more serious than he’s experienced before.

-Falling in love is a thing that strikes like lightning and is therefore extremely analogous to the mystical vision. We don’t know. No how really people attain the mystical vision. There is not as yet a very clear rationale as to how it happens because we do know that it is opened to many people who never did anything to look for it. And many people especially in adolescence have had the mystical vision all of a sudden without the slightest warning and with no previous interest in that kind of thing

He remembers what he was doing when it dawned on him that he was in love, when he felt the air leave his lungs and his eyes widen softly when he realized how nice it would be to kiss your temple and he couldn’t even finish the thought as the feeling ran from his head to his toes.

He was standing in your kitchen as you finished making your lunch for the following day and you made a joke that made yourself laugh, he didn’t think it was a very funny joke but you didn’t care. You giggled to yourself and he couldn’t help but wish he could witness that forever. It hit him like a brick that he would, in almost an instant, give his entirety to you. It terrified him when he imagines you and him ending like his parents. But behind the terror, the fear of divorce, was a softer and quieter emotion that he tried to focus on harder than the insanity of his anxiety. A softer, lovelier, hopeful feeling that he usually gets every time you smile at him. That was the feeling he was searching for, everything else was irrelevant for a few glorious moments.

-But as yet we are not clear as to why it comes about and if there is any method of attaining it the best one is probably to give up the whole idea of getting it…. you see it is completely unpredictable and so it is in that way like falling in love, capricious and therefore crazy. But if you should be so fortunate as to encounter either of these experiences. It seems to me to be a total denial of life to refuse it. And what we therefore have to. Admit in our society is so that we can contain this kind of madness.

He called Tendou that evening, telling him that he thinks he loves you, and Tendou about had a conniption. He was in Paris as his best friend fell in love for the first time. He talked him through it, told him how good it can be. That yes it was going to be work but the reward would be worth it. To not sell himself short out of his own fears. He deserves much more than that. Tendou’s last phrase is what sunk in deep “I know it was unpredictable, that it feels so fickle, but that’s what love is like buddy! You can’t deny it Ushi, you can’t run from it or hide from it, it will only hurt you in the long run”

- You see, in this way we can think about and structure the necessary stable social institution of family sometime without it being constantly threatened of foundering on the rocks of love. Now you see this then means that when when people marry they take any vows at all to each other instead of saying that they will always be true to each other in the sense of meaning I Will Always Love YoU, It means I will be true to you in the sense of I will always be truthful to. I will not pretend that my feelings towards you ARE other than what they are. Because I marry you, because I think that you are a reasonable person to live with and therefore I want you to be you I want you to be someone else I want to be a rubber stamp of me–how boring that would be?! an arrangement in which people set each other free and make an alliance to cooperate with each other in certain ways. Now if it should so occur that they are of immense sexual attraction to each other, so much the better? That this should not be a primary factor in entering into marriage. Admittedly, you must be to a certain extent attractive to each other otherwise there will be no progeny. But this is this is seems to me to be a sensible and reasonable view and just because it is sensible and reasonable it can accommodate what is not sensible and reasonable which is falling in love.

Ushijima is terrified. He’s terrified because the instant immediate joy he felt when he realized he loved you was almost overtaken by worries and stress. He loves you! Now what? He loves structure in his life and he values stability but he knows how rocky relationships can be and how they can ultimately end. He knows he won’t deny it, he won’t back away because of his fear but he needs a plan. A plan to take to you and talk about it, he knows you’ll have the right thing to say but he doesn’t even know what he’ll even say to you yet. He loves that you are so carefree and goofy, a breath of fresh air to his stoicism. You’ve even gently worked your way so deep into his soul that you feel like his other half, his complete other in every way, someone who wasn’t like him at all and how wonderful that is.

Once in his life he thought that arranged marriages were smarter, you did it out of logic and bloodline and family, nothing messy to deal with. But that structure, that boring empty rocky foundation that an arrangement might bring made his mouth taste bad, although at the time he convinced himself it was because it would be more like another job that takes up his time (away from you)

Sensible and reasonable was right up his alley, he thought how nice it would be to have a mini him but he couldn’t think about having that with anyone. He couldn’t think of another half of dna that baby would share that would make it worth it. Not until he saw a picture of you holding your nephew, now whenever he thinks of his babies they share your genes. He thinks of a chunky baby with your eyes and his hair color, a mix of your personality and he’d share volleyball with them. He’s never wanted kids as much as he does when he thinks about sharing them with you. And that’s the part that feels senseless, the love part, the part where you give your entirety to someone and trust that they will care and keep you, no matter what happens, save its not infidelity or other deal breakers of yours he already knows.

Ushijima’s theorizing and thoughts about you over the course of time went from being about understanding why he feels like this to imagining fake scenarios where he wants to take you abroad to travel together, to be together every day and share the hard times and good times, babies or not, marriage or not. He just wants to make you happy for the rest of his life no matter what and he can’t go on much longer without knowing he has a chance to do so

- Well now really when we go back then to falling in love. And say it’s crazy falling. You see we don’t say rising into love. There is in it the idea of the fall. And it is goes back as a matter of fact two extremely fundamental things that there is always a curious tie at some point between the fall and the creation. Taking this ghastly risk, is the condition of there being life. You see, for all life is an act of faith and an act of gamble

And so here he was. Sitting on a bench outside of your dorm, feet bouncing as he stared at the small patch of grass growing in between the sidewalk crack. It’s been a while since that class and he’s been thinking about this constantly.

He knows the risk, feels it in his heart every time he meets up separately with his parents since their divorce. He sees it every time he remembers his childhood and the messy separation. That mess he never wants to repeat. The fall that comes with this love is like that class video had told him, ghastly. He doesn’t know if this could ruin it all, if he takes the leap of faith and it all comes crumbling down years later he’ll be just another divorce. He doesn’t want that. He doesn’t want to end up like his parents and have a child who feels the same. But when he imagines his life he doesn’t think he could be haply without you by his side.

- the moment you take a step, you do so on an act of faith, because you don’t really know that the floors not going to give in to your feet. The moment you take a journey what an act of faith. The moment you enter into any kind of human undertaking in relationship what an act of faith you see you’ve given yourself up. But this is the most powerful thing that can be done surrender see and love is an act of surrender to another person. Total abandonment. I give myself to you. Take me, do anything you like with me. So, that’s quite mad because you see it’s letting things get out of control all sensible people keep things in control.

You know something is up the moment you open the doors and see his back on the bench. You were going to his place since he wasn’t answering his phone, you freeze at the doors at watch him for a moment as your anxiety spikes in your stomach. His shoulders are tense as he leans forward, elbows on his thighs and hands clasped together as he looks down between his bouncing feet. Before you really think about it, you follow the urge to comfort him, to talk to him and make sure it’s all okay. Your feet carry you quickly to his side and you sit down, pulling him into a side hug and wrapping your arms around him.

He gasps when you sit and as you’re wrapping your arms around him he furrows his brows and hugs you back. His heart racing As his fears take the back burner. He didn’t expect you to find him but he also didn’t know how long he’s been sitting here. He buries his face into your neck as he you hold each other in the cool spring evening.

“What’s wrong?” You ask as you hold him and feels his walls break down, his arms tighten around you

“I’m scared” he says quietly and his voice cracks

“Of what Toshi? You can always talk to me” Your fingers run through his hair softly and it soothes his nerves.

He pulls back and cups your cheeks, his eyebrows were still furrowed and his stoic expression was broken by his eyes that were swimming with worry and insecurity.

You saw everything in his eyes and you met him with your determination and steady unwavering love he finds in your eyes. God he feels so mad. So incredibly and undeniably mad and insane and like he isn’t in control. He needs to tell you. Needs the words to come out of his throat so he can calm his heart and soothe his ulcer. The anxiety felt like it was immeasurable and his breathing was starting to get faster until you placed your hands on his cheeks, smothering the bad feelings completely “it’s okay Wakatoshi, I’m right here”

Ushijima feels the exact moment his heart relaxes into the faith, the surrender into love trusting that the floor isn’t going to collapse under his feet, the moment he gives his whole self, body and soul, to the fall, and that moment was when your lips touched his for the first time. Then he let go, the madness left his body and was replaced with a calm assurance that yes, yes this was it, what he’s been waiting for, what he’s been yearning for.

- for all the cost and wisdom what is really sensible is to let go that is to commit oneself to give oneself up and that’s quite mad,

-so we come to the strange conclusion that in madness lies sanity.

#ushijima wakatoshi x you #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima #ushijima x y/n #ushijima x reader #ushijima x you #haikyuu xreader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu ushiwaka #haikyuu ushijima #haikyuu wakatoshi #wakatoshi fluff #ushijima fluff #ushijima fanfic #haikyuu fanfiction

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mochegato · 3 years

Text

Nannyette

Chapter 5 – Fairies Don’t Just Fly

Chapter 1 Chapter 4

“Just a quick in and out, right Tim?” Kon looked pointedly at Tim. “Because I have plans with Cassie.”

“Right, just in and out. I just need to grab the files from his room and we can leave.” Tim assured him quickly.

Kon stared at him, disbelief radiating from his entire being, because he knew Tim was lying. To himself or to Kon, maybe both, but if Marinette was there, Tim was not going to leave quickly. Something would come up. Something needing his immediate attention and then naturally, he couldn’t just leave. She might need help reaching something or she might need a break or she might have some valuable insights on… it didn’t really matter, Tim would come up with something. “I’m holding you to that.” He pointed at him threateningly.

Tim gave him a reassuring smile as he unlocked the door, calling out to them as they walked through to give Marinette and Mar’i a warning before they walked in on them. He turned toward the living room and froze in his tracks, Kon running into him, almost bowling him over.

Marinette was kneeling in the middle of the room pulling warm clothes over Mar’i’s swimsuit. Marinette meanwhile clearly hadn’t gotten the chance to pull all her clothes on before helping Mar’i with hers. She was in just an unbuttoned oxford shirt over her bikini. It wasn’t a particularly revealing bikini but it didn’t have to be for Tim. He had a hard time forming coherent thoughts when she was wrapped in a blanket. But in a bikini? Thank God breathing was an involuntary act because if it wasn’t, he would be dead now.

Marinette looked up at him in mild surprise before giving him a blinding smile. “Hey guys, Kori said you guys were stopping by.” Tim could feel his face turning purple as Marinette sauntered over to them, her open Oxford shirt swaying as she walked. She held out her hand and looked at Kon with a strained smile. “It’s nice to meet you Kon.”

Kon smiled back at her, shaking her hand. “And you too. Tim’s mentioned you… a lot.”

Tim fought the urge to punch him for the comment but Marinette didn’t seem to notice. “That’s nice. He’s mentioned you as well. It’s nice to put a face to the name. Dick said the stuff is in their room.” She turned back to Mar’i, expecting Tim and Kon to move on, but Tim was still frozen in his tracks gaping at her, struggling to breathe.

When she didn’t hear any movement behind her she looked back at them with concern. “You okay, Tim?”

Kon bumped into him as casually as he could to knock him out of his daze. “Yeah,” he started louder than he meant to. Regulating volume was definitely a voluntary act and definitely required more brain power than he was capable of right now. “Yeah,” he said again at a closer to normal volume this time. “What a coincidence. We were going to the pool too.”

Kon looked over at him in barely hidden shock, “We were?” he whispered. Tim jabbed an elbow into his side and gave Marinette a strained smile.

“Oh, that’ll be fun. Did you guys want to walk with us?” She asked kindly. Spending the day with Tim in a swimsuit, with his boyfriend, wasn’t exactly her idea of a great afternoon, but she knew Mar’i would love it.

Mar’i was jumping up and down next to her. “Yes, yes, yes. Come with us!”

Tim’s smile turned a bit more strained, “Uh, sure. Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.” He turned to Kon and whispered as quietly as he could, “You need to go through Dick’s window and get our trunks as quickly as possible.”

Kon glowered at him, “No, no I don’t. You promised.”

“Bikini, Kon. She’s wearing a bikini.”

Kon gave him an unimpressed look. “We’ve both seen hundreds of women in bikinis and never cared.”

Tim gave him a pleading look, “But it’s Marinette. Please, please do this for me. Please.” His eyes turned desperate.

Kon sighed in defeat and rolled his eyes. “You’re paying for my and Cassie’s next date. And it won’t be cheap.” He turned away from Tim’s triumphant eyes. “I’ll just grab our trunks from Dick’s room. That’s what we were here for anyway.”

<><><><><>

“I can't breathe.” Tim whispered to Kon as they walked toward the indoor pool a short distance behind Marinette and Mar’i after having removed and stored everything but their swimsuits and towels. He now had an unobstructed view of Marinette in her bikini and his lungs were starting to rebel.

“You can breathe.” Kon rolled his eyes at Tim.

“No, no, I can't breathe.” Tim repeated, panic clear in his eyes.

“Tim, you can breathe. You're fine. Stop it.”

“No, really I can't. Look at her. I can't. I can't breathe. I'm going to pass out.” Tim stopped and bent over trying to gasp for breath.

“Well, that'll be sexy. I'm sure she'll go for that.” Kon responded calmly, continuing to walk forward without looking back.

Tim glared at him, focusing on his annoyance instead of Marinette until his breathing slowed down. It wasn’t enough that she was sweet and smart and strong and skilled, she had to be sexy too? It was just playing dirty, really.

He was finally brought out of his thoughts when he heard Mar’i, Marinette, and Kon laughing as they splashed Kon. He smiled at the scene. Marinette looked over at him with a brilliant smile, “You coming in?”

He smiled back at her, an edge of nervousness still present. He jumped into the pool, creating as big a splash as he could in the shallow water. Mar’i and Marinette giggled at the movement. Mar’i ran over to the kiddie slide to hide. Tim walked up behind Kon, keeping his eyes on Marinette, “Make sure I don't drown.”

Kon rolled his eyes but bumped his shoulder with his own. “I got your dork ass.”

“That’s all I ask.” Tim nodded at him solemnly, making his way over to Mar’i and Marinette.

“Since when,” Kon scoffed quietly, following him over.

“Look at the mermaids, Marinette! They’re like the mermaids from Peter Pan.” Mar’i grinned up at her, before her eyes grew wide. “We should play Peter Pan! Kon can be Peter and I can be Tinker Bell because we can fly.”

Kon’s eyes grew wide and he looked over to Tim in a panic, trying to catch his eye. Mar’i was revealing their secret to Marinette, but Tim wasn’t concerned at all. He understood Tim’s interest in her, but he knew better than to throw away their secret identities. Why wasn’t he reacting? Surely he wasn’t that far gone.

Marinette smiled at her and crouched down next to her, “but we don’t fly at the pool silly, we swim.” Kon stared at her and back to Tim. Did she… did she know? “But you can still be a fairy. Fairies don’t just fly, you know.” She leaned in as if to pass on an extremely important secret. “I should know, I’m best friends with a few.”

Mar’i considered her explanation and finally nodded in agreement. “I can be a swimming fairy!” She exclaimed excitedly. “And Marinette can be Wendy and Tim can be… Captain Hook!”

“Why am I the villain?” Tim asked with a mock pout.

“Because you’re important and all the other main people are taken.” She looked at him and cocked her head to the side, studying him carefully. “I guess you could be Michael…” she mused quietly. “He liked to pout a lot too.”

Tim’s mouth dropped in mock offense. Marinette tried to stifle her giggles but Kon flat out laughed hard enough he had doubled over. Tim collapsed on Marinette’s shoulder, needing the support after that blow to his ego. Well, he didn’t need to lean on her, but he did it anyway. With his head buried in his arm, he missed the way Marinette flushed deeply at the contact. Kon however, was front and center for it. He smirked at the reaction.

“How about we let Tim choose.” Marinette suggested instead, moving reluctantly away from Tim and his outrageously, unfairly toned, almost naked body. “He can be Hook, or Michael, or another fairy, or a mermaid, or… oooohhhh he could be the Tick Tock Croc and try to get us!”

Tim grinned maliciously “Tick” he said quietly crouching down low. “Tock” he moved closer to Mar’i who squealed in delight.

“Marinette save me! Save me!” She giggled trying to run to Marinette but falling in the water. She turned toward Tim, still in scrambling in the water, a smile on her face.

Marinette rushed over to her and grabbed her out of the water trying to back away from Tim who was still moving slowly toward them to the tune of “Tick… Tock… Tick… Tock”.

“He’s getting close!” Mar’i called loudly with a smile.

“Oh no!” Marinette grinned back at her before shifting her expression to mock seriousness. “Time for plan B. Kon, come take care of your man while I save the fairy.”

“Nuh uh,” Kon shook his head. “He’s not my man. I take no responsibilities for him outside of… uh… cases.” Kon quickly looked for a replacement for missions. “He’s totally up for grabs.” He winked at Marinette.

Marinette stared at him for a few seconds unsure of what he meant, trying to process what he said. Did he… did he mean they weren’t dating? Did Tim think they were but Kon didn’t? Oh God, poor Tim! She was shaken out of her thoughts by Mar’i shifting in her arms, “He’s almost got us!” she squealed.

Marinette turned back to Tim who was just a few feet away now and had dark pink dusting his cheeks for some reason, probably Kon saying they weren’t together. Her heart tightened in sympathy for him. But she wasn’t going to let Tim suffer. She was going to make this fun for him and distract him from what Kon had said. She gave Mar’i a determined look. “I’ll hold him off, Kon can save you. Kon, catch in 3, 2, 1.” She called to him before tossing Mar’i to him. Mar’i landed in the water just in front of Kon, whose arms were around her before her arms reached the water and pulling her up, her face set with an overjoyed expression.

“I’ve got you fairy princess,” Kon grinned at her. They both looked back to see Marinette trying to hold off Tim. He jumped at her, grabbing her around the waist as they fell into the water. She popped up out of the water and wiped the water out of her eyes. She looked around quickly to gain her bearings before seeing Tim who just emerged with a devious grin. She narrowed her eyes playfully and jumped toward him, putting her hands on his shoulders to push him down. Tim went under the water but pushed back up quickly, grabbing her around the waist again, lifting her out of the water and holding her so she couldn’t get him again. She giggled and squirmed in his arms before shifting her weight and twisting so she fell to the side, taking him with her. She pushed back up to the surface and turned to Kon and Mar’i, “Go! I don’t know how much longer I can distract h...” Tim grabbed her again before she could finish her sentence, swinging her around with a laugh she matched.

Kon leaned over to Mar’i’s ear. “I bet she could distract him for the rest of the day without even trying.”

Mar’i nodded at him completely missing the implication, “Yeah, she’s pretty entertaining and he always seems to get distracted by her. Not as much as her though. She’s always falling for him.” She shook her head at the memories. Her eyes suddenly lit up and she straightened up in Kon’s arms. “Oh, they should go on a date.”

Kon smiled conspiratorially at her, “We should work on that. We can come up with some ideas, but it will be a secret.” He held a finger to his lips.

Mar’i smiled back and nodded at him. “I won’t tell.”

They looked back over to Marinette and Tim in time to see Marinette slip on a slick patch of pool floor. Tim reached out to pull her back up, wiping the hair out of her eyes with a concerned look. Marinette flushed deeply at the contact. “I don’t think we’ll have to work that hard at all,” Kon commented with a smile.

Chapter 6

Tags:

@timari-month-event, @ichigorose @stainedglassm @better-toast @theymakeupfairies @trippingovermyfeet

#maribat #timari #timinette #timari january #Nannyette #prompt - Peter Pan/Neverland AU

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letmetellyouaboutmyfeels · 3 years

Note

Why does everyone hate the Dear Evan Hansen movie so much? I thought the Broadway show was like beloved??

Hello nonny dear! This got long because I am incapable of shutting up so this is below the cut.

So, quick disclaimer: I am not a fan of DEH as a musical. I never liked it, for a few reasons, the main one being a personal preference - I simply don't like stories where the entire plot is based on a person lying to people. It really, really stresses me out (it's why I can't watch a lot of comedies). I think part of it is being autistic - I don't understand why the person lied. You can try explaining it to me, I just won't understand. It doesn't compute in my brain. In related news, I tend to be a bad liar and also extremely blunt. So!

DEH as a musical was loved by a lot of people, specifically young people. I actually noticed a very similar trend with DEH that I did with RENT, which is a musical from my generation that is beloved by people my age but by older people not so much. RENT, like DEH, speaks to the opinions, viewpoints, and issues of younger people. RENT is full of youthful anger at an unfair system, at feeling powerless, at not being listened to, and it also speaks to that youthful love of rebellion and art for art's sake. DEH, on the other hand, speaks to young people's struggles to fit in, with feeling alone, with depression, and so on.

As pointed out in one of the reviews, part of why people liked DEH was that the character was so young. The fact that he was in high school was what sold the story. Who hasn't, in a mixture of awkwardness, good intentions, and desire to be valuable, done a questionable or even wrong thing? Who hasn't done something they thought was small, like a white lie, only to have that thing spiral out of control? Kids (and teenagers are kids, God bless you all, I say that with the most sincere and deep affection) do that shit all the time.

However, it's not as endearing in adults. Adults, you see, theoretically understand better the consequences of their actions, the far-reaching ramifications, and are just generally (supposedly) on top of their shit.

To watch an adult (and the main actor playing the title character is completely 100% an adult now) make the same mistakes as a teenager is not endearing. It's annoying. Because your brain RECOGNIZES he's an adult. This is actually why people have discussed the problems with casting 30-somethings as teenagers in TV shows, because we see those 30-somethings in very adult situations (I don't mean that in a "protect the children!" way) but also behaving like, well, teenagers? And so it creates a weird dichotomy in your head and it is literally confusing your brain.

So you have an adult that your brain knows is an adult, behaving like a child, and that is annoying to you. It's not endearing. It's bothersome.

Another reason is that DEH is no longer hot off the presses. Give any popular piece of work time, and you'll start to see the imperfections (although online culture take this way too far and will rip any piece of media to pieces for not being flawless and perfect). A lot of people, again, especially young people (everyone I know who loved DEH was in high school or just starting college) connected with the characters and were grateful to have a story that was front and center about mental health issues. But now, time has passed. The initial rush of emotion connected to DEH is over, and people are able to view it with a more disconnected and therefore more critical eye.

I think, also, DEH fell into the trap that Prom did - Prom was not a perfect musical, and I think if I'd seen it on stage I would've thought of it as cute, sweet, and a bit forgettable. But the director made a LOT of mistakes in filming, such as in casting choices (James Corden please sit down) and in cinematography (he ruined dance numbers by zooming in on people's faces instead of zooming out and letting us watch them dance). I suspect DEH suffers from similar issues, since people often struggle to translate musical theatre to film.

It's oddly easier to suspend your disbelief when watching something on stage than watching it on film. In film, we have special effects, we have so much realism, we can make everything come alive, and so people have higher standards for it than in theatre where we all tacitly acknowledge that this isn't real but we're all here for a good time. The Lion King uses puppetry and large masks liberally. Avenue Q has hand puppets. Come From Away has actors in multiple roles, switching up using only minimal costume changes like hats or vests. Cats has no fuckin' plot whatsoever. But it's a lot harder to accept in film someone just belting out into song, so you have to find ways around that.

Chicago did a really great job by framing all musical numbers like you were in a cabaret show, firmly putting you in a dreamscape of the heads of the characters. They're not really singing, this is what they feel in their minds. In the Heights had a framing device where he's telling the story to kids and had the main character cheekily address the camera, breaking the fourth wall almost immediately. Cabaret swung hard the other way and was completely diegetic.

DEH, I suspect, did not put in the ground work to help you suspend your disbelief, which just made the flaws that much stronger. I always thought the songs in DEH are mediocre, and it seems film critics agree with me. And when the rest of the musical is going wrong (songs, casting, camera shots, etc) it makes it easier to see the glaring flaw which is the fact that the title character exploits someone's suicide for his own gain. He doesn't just lie (at least not in the film) - he creates fake email exchanges between himself and the dead teenager to fabricate the lie and sell it, so that he can get the love and sympathy he craves.

Not exactly a likable person, even a teenager, but especially when the teenager is played by a 30-something who looks it. The other characters are just as flat, and the musical makes a (sort of) villain of the one character who's genuinely being selfless.

Finally, a film can include details, thanks to camera shots, that a musical on stage can't. There's a scene in the film that I can't recall being in the musical (I could be wrong!) where the title character looks up the dead teen's favorite books list in the yearbook. The books are so stereotypical "suicidal teens read this" that I could vomit. Little things like that take a flawed story and push it into the realm of insulting.

Now, I admit, I am biased. I do not like this musical and have not for some time. I'm forever angry that it won Tony awards when Bandstand should have instead. I feel Bandstand handled mental health issues (ranging from PTSD to alcoholism to grief to depression) in a much better and more nuanced way. It didn't show one teenager exploiting another (dead) teenager for social clout. The songs were highly original and inspired, and of a jazzy 40s style we don't often see anymore but still felt fresh and connecting to a 21st century audience. Listening to DEH on the other hand I think, "well I've heard this all a million times before."

I also didn't like how it handled mental health, and I found the main character completely unsympathetic and manipulating. The fact that he was a straight white boy made it all worse. I am sick and fucking tired of stories about straight white boys fucking up, being apathetic and mediocre, and still earning sympathy and second chances from both other characters and the audience. I personally feel that all the bad reviews about the DEH movie are a long time coming and I am feeling extremely vindicated right now, since people are finally agreeing with me that this musical does not deserve the praise it initially received.

But! That is my own personal opinion. I hope that, if you or anyone else did like the musical, or are confused, you will note my previous thoughts about why the film is not being as well received. Translating musicals to film is hard, and this film made several blunders that both added to and enhanced earlier flaws in the musical.

#mads answers things #I hope I was able to explain why people aren't liking the film #while keeping my grudge/biases mostly out of it #my extra-petty opinion is that it's a crappy musical and people are finally realizing it #but I hope my answer showed some kinder and more technical reasons why there might be a dichotomy here

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my-writings-and-musings · 4 years

Note

hello! if you are taking requests, can you please do the oxygen loss prompt with megatron and whirl?

I did Whirl in part two, so I have Megatron here with a ridiculously long one and I hope that's okay! I added Thunderclash as well so I can keep my pattern of two because... I like patterns. I might be getting super into this prompt...

Part One: Here!

Part Two: Here!

Part Three: You're Here!

Part Four: Here!

Part Five: Here!

Part Six: Here!

Part Seven: Here!

Part Eight: Here!

Part Nine: Here!

Part Ten: Here!

Part Eleven: Here!

Part Twelve: Here!

Megatron

·You're in the ship's recently finished classroom organizing lesson plans on your own, having been working with Megatron to try and set up more structured class schedules on the growing list of topics he's begun to cover. You're thrilled he's found a kind of calling on the ship, especially one that seems to be allowing bots to see the side of him you know best. He's made it quite clear in his own way that your assistance in this endeavor means the world to him.

·He's on the bridge, scouting out potential locations for refueling on the next leg of the journey with the rest of the commanding officers. For once there's mostly cohesion in their efforts, and his insistence on choosing planets hospitable to humans is met with agreement, if not surprise. They're on schedule to finish early for a quiet afternoon off when everything turns to a level of chaos even the experienced crewmembers have to call extreme. The rumble that shakes the entire ship is one Megatron and experienced space travelers know well; they've been ambushed.

·You're nearly knocked off the desk you're standing on by the unexpected tremors. While you're trying to figure out what could possibly have caused the disturbance, a message is appearing up on the bridge, where alerts of failing systems and corrupted codes almost make it impossible to hear an alien captain decree an intent to storm the ship. Megatron attempts diplomacy before lives are lost, but the enemy makes it clear; this ship and its contents are more valuable than anything they could offer. While the captain notes their species has heard of the famed Lost Light and its crew, their hack of the security systems proved embarrassingly simple, and they look forward to the easy payoff from selling the scraps of the Cybertronians onboard!

·With communications down and systems struggling through an ongoing sabotage, Megatron still prepares to coordinate a defense, but is stopped before he can begin by a final taunt from their enemy. Their hack of the security cameras showed his fondness for his new pet, a homo sapien of all things, and thus his current concern should be for the atmospheric regulation instead of battle plans. But considering how many dead organics he's left in his wake, surely one more shouldn't perturb him too deeply, yes?

·The line goes dead just as the ship's alarm attempts to sound, signaling an impending attack before it too crashes with everything else. His fellow officers are moving to get defenses up however they can, preparing to get the resident tech experts on the job of restoring key systems while trying to plan a counterattack with no way to reach anyone. He's near to frozen as he tries to message you to no avail, the cruel mockery of the enemy cutting deep in ways words rarely do for him, if only because the implication terrifies him like nothing ever has; he's all but helpless to save you.

·Only experience and an undying determination allow him to break through the fog. Without asking for guidance or permission, he states his one intent; to rescue you however he can. If there are any objections, he does not hear them, and soon his pedes are tearing down the hallway to where he last saw you and prays he'll find you; the classroom. Oblivious to his rush, the only thing you're aware of is the fact that something is amiss, but you don't have a clue as to what. Between the tremor, the brief blare of the alarm and your inability to get your communicator running, you only know there's danger inbound.

·Not having much information to work with, you surmise that the classroom is probably not the safest place to hunker down, and recall that the medical and scientific wings aren't far. As the doctors on the ship have added human medicine to their repertoire, and are hardly defenseless, trying to get to them seems your greatest hope for securing yourself. Not wanting to panic, you push your supplies into a somewhat neat pile and climb down the small ladder that's been added to the desk for your sake. Somehow you don't find yourself at the top of your worries at all. Your thoughts center almost entirely on Megatron, who will undoubtedly be forced into whatever conflict might erupt, and even an unexpected staleness in the air around you hardly registers amidst your anxiety.

·Megatron is still too logical of a bot not to stop every crewmember he sees to give them a brief list of orders. He knows that, without a united defense and victory, there won't be any way you can be saved at all. So he takes the hindrance, though bots hardly take long to move when he issues a command. But his growing fear gnaws at him with a simple truth; without communication, he can't even be sure of your location, let alone your condition. Perhaps he's going the wrong way. Perhaps you're already beyond help. Perhaps you've already been discovered by the enemy. All he can do in the face of blinding terror is keep moving, keep coordinating, and keep hoping beyond reason that he'll be fortunate for once.

·You can't remember the classroom ever taking so long to cross, but that's hardly important, especially with your communicator still failing to function. Reaching Megatron would give you incredible comfort right now, if only to hear he's alright, yet that's obviously not going to happen. Honestly, it sounds silly to really think about it, the human worrying for the Cybertronian... But your anxiety isn't comforted merely to remember he's a gigantic combat veteran, not knowing anything about his current status is all it needs to wander to scary places...

·Closing in on your position, the mech in question echoes your worry, but his knowledge of the current danger puts his feelings closer to panic. All he knows is that he's coordinated a not insignificant number of bots for a better defense on his way through the ship. With better resistance on their side, he knows they can win, because they must. The alternative won't come to pass while his spark still flickers within him. That promise comes to an early test when he overhears enemies moving on the path ahead, and he takes the charge without hesitation, his terror converting quite easily to rage for extra assistance.

·By the time you're at the door you know something is wrong with you. Each step comes with a wobble you can't explain, and soon the dizziness you thought was worry has grown to almost debilitating levels. Why is the room spinning? Why does your body feel so heavy? It doesn't worry you as much as it probably should, but you know it needs to be fixed, especially with the ship potentially in jeopardy. Faint activity from the hallway outside spurs you to finally trigger the door to open, which thankfully appears to be one of the few systems still working. Heavy footsteps not too far away register in your ears just as you're forced to lean against a wall for support.

·The aliens that come into view before you quite unexpectedly are large, tough, and well armed. Most races would have found them an insurmountable challenge, and even an experienced Cybertronian combatant couldn't expect an easy victory against a single fighter, leaving you quite hopeless as you stare upwards in confusion. Megatron is not the norm, and his drive to win is fuelled by far more than just survival, so he feels little more than irritation when he finally arrives to the hallway you're pinned within. More than a dozen mark his path to you, their forms clustered around the helpless human in sick curiosity, and as a result they're heedless to his appearance.

·Hulking forms most definitely not of Cybertronian make tower over your body as it struggles to keep upright, the ceiling spinning overhead as you try to connect thoughts and move your legs to flee. A language you don't understand precedes a slow swipe in your direction, one that you stumble away from more than dodge, resulting in you roughly collapsing to the floor. Something like cruel laughter greets your painful tumble. You should be angry, being mocked like a bug skittering from its inevitable squishing, but God you're so exhausted. It's not even in you to be afraid when the barrel of an alien gun is pointed at your head and the scent of ozone fills your nose while the barrel fills with light.

·A second tremor shakes the ship, but this one proves to be far more deadly than the last. Your would be killers are obliterated by a blur of gunmetal gray that pummels them into the floor, and before you can blink the carnage begins and seems to escalate to unimaginable levels of ferocity. Only your familiarity with Megatron allows you to discern him amidst the flurry of quickly diminishing combatants, but he's nothing like the mech you know in this instant, going for sheer brute force over strategy as he tears aliens apart with his bare servos. In the bloody chaos you can't tell if he's taking damage or not despite the sheer numbers he was initially facing.

·The end of it all is somehow more startling than the beggining. In one final attack he ends the last soldier, quieting the cacophony of battle to leave only the steady drip of alien blood down the wall and his own haggard ventilations. There's a dash of bright energon amongst the mess, glowing in rivulets down his side, and somehow that's what gets your cloudy brain moving again. Pushing exhausted legs against the floor, you try to rise as you cry out in concern, reaching for him before you collapse right back against the solid ground.

·Heedless to his own injuries, Megatron is over you in a single instant, no longer blinded by the fury he'd experienced at the sight of you in peril. All he'd known was that your attackers had needed to die, no hesitation, and tearing them apart had come easily from there. Now things are once again far from simple. The blood on his hands doesn't stop him from picking you up as gingerly as he can, though your impossibly tiny body appears more delicate than ever in his massive palms. Though it makes him sick to realize, he does indeed know a struggling organic when he sees one, making the captain's words burn in his audials once more.

·Guilt is forced down to a minimum so he can focus on what matters; you. He needs to get you somewhere safe but with access to oxygen, and the only place that can happen is the medical bay or the laboratory, and he knows both are quite close. He couldn't care less about his own gashed side, so even if the medics and scientists are elsewhere he should likely be able to rig something up before energon loss impacts him. Holding you close, in a way that will permit him to shield you with his body, he starts moving while he speaks to you. It's obvious even to him his words aren't motivating, but at least they seem to get your attention.

·Looking up at him, feeling like you're tiny beyond belief thanks to his incredible size, you wonder how much of this could be real. Megatron had just hurled himself into battle for you, enduring agonizing wounds in the process, and beaten back what should have been impossible odds... If he wasn't so close you could touch him, you'd certainly think he was just a figment of your imagination emerging from the spinning hallways around you. His deep baritone rumbles reassurances to you as your eyes slowly drift shut, your perception fading around the edges until he's all you can see, and you can feel sleep beckoning like never before.

·He truly has seen enough organics dying to recognize that you're fading in his arms, and seeing the connection between such atrocities and you is slowly starting to tear into him with guilt that refuses to be ignored. How many lives just like yours has he snuffed out? How recently was it that he could have ended your life amongst the billions of others, unaware of what a gift you are to the universe? More specifically, because of this, what right does he have to so much as look at you? The thoughts are a dark and unmanageable tangle by the time he arrives at his destination, where an already overwhelmed medical crew is tending to the injured from an apparently victorious battle. He's near to shock when he hands you over to a frantically rushing Ratchet and simply explains you need oxygen, his hand gingerly cupping his injury before he firmly insists on being the last to be repaired. If he's spoken to afterwards, he doesn't remember any of what is said.

·The medical bay is dim when you awaken, and you see that you've been placed in your own private room when you look about, oxygen mask holding secure to your face as you do so. A massive shape against the wall would have startled you if you didn't immediately recognize Megatron. He smiles almost sadly when you awaken, and while you initially attribute his uncharacteristic weariness to the welded injury on his side, he quickly makes it clear that isn't the case. Whispering a simple wish for your recovery, he excuses himself and makes to leave, and you know that something is amiss m

·When you merely call for him to stop, he breaks, confessing that his relief to see you alive is equal only to his certainty that he's not worthy of you and can no longer pretend otherwise. It takes all of your strength to sit up and demand he stay; you refuse to let the bot who just saved you walk out, especially when you've made it abundantly clear his past is something you've accepted, and your firm reminder is cut short only by dizziness forcing you to lay back. The sight stirs him to return to your side, concern in his optics, and you lay a hand on the tip of his digit in a breathless and wordless reminder; he's more than his past to you, and you made that decision knowing the struggles ahead. He smiles as his digit gently strokes your forehead, recalling that he too had made a decision that day; to trust you meant yours.

Thunderclash

·The two of you are in the hangar practicing sparring, which for your benefit mostly consists of him holding up a training dummy against his palm while you whack at it, and as is often the case you've become sidetracked by conversation over actual work. He's laying on his front to keep the two of you closer to eye level, leaning his chin against his spare hand for comfort, talking about all the little things that come to mind as opposed to the grand topics he's used to being asked about. Frankly, this freedom a big part of what he likes about these moments with you. He gets to just be a bot with interests like any other.

·Your casual chat is interrupted by a communication from the command team on the bridge, who summon him for assistance tracing where a series of small anomalies across the ship might be coming from. Systems are glitching in ways that can't be explained, the defensive radar can't seem to decide if there's something in the apparently empty space around them, and in an ironic twist the message goes dead just as communication problems are mentioned. It's quickly apparent something needs to be done.

·Apologizing for having to cut things short, the massive bot offers to give you a ride to the heart of the ship, which he'll have to pass on his way to the bridge. Always eager to spend more time together, you happily oblige, taking the place of the training dummy in his palm as he lifts you to rest beside his spark. While his shoulder is arguably a more dignified location, you take more than a little comfort feeling the hum of his energy at your back, and thus have chosen this as your travel spot. Between his wound and the many setbacks it's taken to get him back in shape, it's just nice to feel his spark going strong.

·Not long after setting off, he gets the sense there's more to these troubles than technical error, and that something less than desirable may be the culprit. It's not something he can explain, but being more attuned to the subtler things in his environment just gives him a feeling. When he voices this to you, along with the thought you should probably be left somewhere safe, you ask what he believes might be coming. Not because you don't believe him, but you know he only drops his smile when he is preparing for something bad, and you haven't seen proof of any concrete threat.

·With almost comedic timing, the ship lurches at that very moment, nearly knocking the big bot off balance. Only his firm but careful hold saves you from a twenty foot fall. The rumble fades off with something like a great dragging sensation through the ship, which you'd compare to a Manhattan sized car grinding to a halt. Now cupping you in both hands, Thunderclash asks earnestly if you're alright, to which you reassuringly reply that a little turbulence isn't enough to do any damage.

·Smiling at the fortitude of your tiny body, he begins walking straight away, shifting to strategy as his red optics narrow in contemplation. He explains that the particular nature of that shake confirmed his suspicions something is planning an attack. Rather, they're initiating an attack. The sensation of a ship being locked to another and anchored is a particular one, and combined with their systems crashing it's obvious an enemy has come prepared to strike for a well planned ambush.

·You see that he's worrying, but you say nothing of it, taking hold of his thumb to communicate support. Being with him in private has made it clear his existence as a perpetual source of strength for others exhausts him, so you've since committed to acting as his well of certainty in difficult times. Not letting your fear bleed in to your words, you instead ask what the two of you should do, confirming your own communicator is uselessly jammed as you do so.

·Moving through the ship at considerable speed with his long legs, he decides that you'll still need to be secured rather quickly, as enemy combatants are probably already storming the ship or preparing to do so. You'd debate him if you weren't well aware of the logic in his plan. No matter what the enemy is, you won't stand much of a chance in a full on brawl, as anything confident enough to attack a Cybertronian starship is likely to have the firepower to back itself up. Still, it's impossible not to be dissapointed by your inability to offer aid, though it's probably for the best as you're rather exhausted from sparring anyway.

·It happens in a blur, but that's partly because of the shocking reaction time of the bot carrying you, something few would expect due to his size. Thunderclash registers the threat as soon as he turns the corner, a feat aided by the very much not Cybertronian appearance of the figures he sees, and then made far easier by the multiple clicks of weapons preparing to fire. Your presence in his hands became his central point of focus in that instant. Turning on the spot, he allowed the first hail of bullets to strike his armored back, keeping you well out of the line of fire before ducking behind an opposite corner for cover. The sting of the gunfire matters little when he sees you safe in his hands, and less when he instructs you to stay low after setting you down and charging in to fight.

·In the heat of it all, you're embarrassed to be caught so frazzled, as this is hardly your first exposure to alien combat. But there's little time to admonish yourself when chaos unfolds just around the corner, and your tiny size permits a small peek... Thunderclash is the gentlest giant in the world to you, but in just a few blinks the hulking aliens are on the losing front, and while his fighting style is far from gratuitous it is effective. You're still trembling from the rush of the initial shock when the last enemy of the group is on the floor, but even with your shaky vision you can see your bot is unharmed. For a moment that little burst of relief supersedes everything else.

·In usual fashion though, he expresses worry for you when he returns to pick you up from where he left you, drawing an affectionate chuckle from you at how impossibly selfless this mech can be. But he doesn't back down from the question like he usually does. His expression of concern intensifies as he starts moving again, and his sharp optics find ample to worry about on your seemingly unharmed body, with particular attention being paid to your face. Those brilliant eyes of yours are well known to him, and so he can tell something is... off in their beautiful depths. Even if his medical studies focus very little on organics, he's able to recognize the signs of a body struggling, and your paleness combined with the way you labor for each breath tells him something is very wrong.

·Now in a race against time, he has no choice but to move, gunning it towards the ship's tech wing where the laboratories and medical bay are located. He doesn't yet know what's wrong with you for certain, but aid will be there if it's anywhere to be found. There's no time to be wasted in securing you somewhere either, he's going to have to face any threats as they come in the moment whilst ensuring your protection in the process. It's a set of circumstances he's encountered before in his long and eventful time as a soldier, but there's an entirely new variable this time around; you. He adores you, like no one he's ever met before, and perhaps it's selfish but the very thought of losing you... he's not sure his spark could take it.

·The soothing tone of his voice and the rhythmic thumping of his footsteps make it surprisingly difficult for you to heed his requests to stay as awake as possible. Even though your breaths are coming in with difficulty, it seems like sleep would be a fantastic idea at the moment, even if only to rest your eyes. His cupped hands just support your body so nicely, and are so warm, and his voice is so delightfully melodic. Why does he seem so intent on keeping you conscious? Why does he look so incredibly upset to see you struggling to keep your eyes open?

·The pathway he chooses is mercifully free of conflict at first, but that matters little due to your rate of deterioration, as you may not make it even at his full speed. Driving isn't an option due to his need to be combat ready, and the lack of options and hope is absolutely tearing him apart. He hasn't had someone like you in his life before, and the desperation in his voice begins to show that, cracking as he loses his steadfast control of his usually impervious wall of confidence. The selfishness of his desire kills him; how dare he put his own feelings on you due to his weakness? Begging you to survive for his sake?

·No amount of haze can prevent you from startling at his pain. There are tears in his optics, though he doesn't even seem to notice them, letting them fall down his face as he pleads. In the warm fog clouding your brain, you feel a surge of worry, and your hand instinctively grabs at his nearest digit to give it a squeeze. Before you can even offer a breathless reasurance, he ceases running and dives from gunfire that seems to erupt from nowhere, laying you in a tiny maintenance crevice before hurling himself at the second delay he knows you don't have time for. The last thing you see before drifting off is the grief in his optics that you wish you'd been able to comfort...

·While his combat skills always make things quick, in this blur of pain and rage he's downright brutal, ending each foe swiftly but with absolute contempt for their existence clear in every torn limb. Hits to his own frame don't register at all. Bullets and blades mean nothing in the face of what he's about to lose, and the vengeance fueling his strength turns foes into scattered body parts more effectively than any grenade ever could. By the end of it all he's likely set a record for the swiftness of his takedown, but it matters as little as his multitude of bleeding wounds. All he can see is your now limp body as he pulls it from the hiding spot, and his vision narrows to only your faintly moving chest and his pedes moving one past the other through the carnage.

·There's a mass of activity in the technology wing, likely due to injuries as well as the many bots ordered to stand guard in the event of battle, but he doesn't hear the reaction his arrival triggers in the slightest. His sharp processor is reduced to one goal, and anything unrelated doesn't exist. At the sight of the crowded medical bay he starts to strategize. Ratchet appears in his vision, first focusing only on his obvious injuries and the alien blood he didn't know was spattered across his frame, before well trained optics catch sight of the tiny human limp in his hands.

·There's a rush of an explanation; they think one of the systems downed was the atmospheric generators, resulting in a loss of the oxygen the ship maintains for your needs. It's all the information Thunderclash needs to act. Brushing off any help for himself and encouraging the more egregiously wounded to be tended first, he requests only to be provided what you need. Busy tending the injured, medics still assist him getting a supply of oxygen going where they can, with Ratchet using his particular knowledge of human anatomy to ensure the ratio is correct for your biology while Thunderclash prepares it all. Dexterous hands set you on a medical slab where an oxygen mask and scanner are used to return your blood oxygen to normal, and just like that, he knows you'll eventually be okay...

·By the time you wake up your tiny frame has been moved to a private room, both to keep you from the chaos of crammed in bots and to give the two of you privacy from adoring admirers. He's beside you, his wounds patched but his frame still dirtied with blood, a sight that shocks you enough to force a gasp into your mask. Perking up the instant he hears you, the hulking mech is as close as the berth allows in a flash. A stream of questions about your wellbeing passes his lips before you can get a word in. Between the dried blood, the patched wounds, and the faint discoloration of his optics that suggests recent weeping... It's hard to know what to ask him, so you vaguely request a rundown of what happened.

·His face falls, and in between recounts of alien attacks and near death experiences there's overwhelming self depreciation. To hear him tell it the entire affair might as well be his fault. You've always known him to be humble, even critical of his actions, but this borders on self destructive. Worse, the crux of his crisis seems to be that he was motivated to save you not just by duty, but by his selfish desire to protect the one he loved so dearly and can't bare to lose. His own desires are inexcusable in these things, as he puts it, and could have hindered him at your expense. Shaky arms rise so that you can grab the nearest part of him, a digit once again, as you encourage him to stop tormenting himself. You owed him your life, several times over just for today alone, and there wasn't a bot in existence less selfish than he. The kindness of his spark was what you'd fallen in love with, and what you still loved now, because he was more than a legend to you. You loved Thunderclash the bot, not the expectation everyone else had built around him, and thus he'd always be enough just by being himself. Finally relaxing after everything, and his spark singing at your ability to become his rock when he needs one, he allows himself to just rest and exist as he is. Laying his helm on the berth beside you, he nuzzles close, allowing himself to feel simple gratitude to have and love you as you do him.

#transformers #maccadam #more than meets the eye #mtmte #lost light #idw #tf #my writing #requests #anon #megatron x reader #megatron #thunderclash x reader #thunderclash #human reader #self insert

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stxleslyds · 3 years

Note

Have you watched the Teen Titans animated series or Young Justice? If so, what do you think about their characterization of Dick Grayson?

And while we're at it, what about the animated movies? How does his characterization compare there?

Hi! Thank you so much for the ask!

I have to be honest, Teen Titans wasn’t a show that I was able to watch when it came out because I didn’t have cable tv yet and by the time that I had it I was actually into other TV shows, I watched a few episodes from what I believe was the last season but I didn’t really like the Titans lineup so I didn’t pay much attention to it. So, I can’t really say anything about his characterization there.

Young Justice I have watched! I believe I watched it for the first time in 2018 on Netflix. I loved the first season, it was amazing and it kinda made me want to read DC comics again. I had “taken a break” from reading DC because I was consuming another type of content, mostly MCU and Marvel Comics. I watched seasons two and three but I didn’t like them as much as the first one because I felt like there were too many characters and it overwhelmed me a little bit.

So, to answer your question, I love Young Justice’s characterization of Dick Grayson (as Robin, Nightwing, and just Dick). Although the universe where YJ is very different from the comics one, they did make an excellent job developing Dick and the other team members in the first season.

It was weird seeing Dick in the YJ team instead of the Titans one but I am glad that they did it that way because they took their time to develop Dick and then Tim as the Robins in the different seasons.

Dick not being the leader of the team was also weird but it led to so many interesting plotlines for him. I also felt that their take on Dick Grayson was very in tune with the times in which the show came out he was very tech-driven (which he used to be in comics but then they gave that characteristic to Tim and took it away from Dick) and is Bat training was shown plenty, he truly seemed like one of the most valuable assets for the team even though he was the youngest and he had no powers.

His personality felt real for his age in the show, he was funny and smart, his acrobatic skills were there. I really loved the way they handled his change of mind when it came to wanting to lead the team at all costs and wanting to become Batman in the future. That episode was wonderfully done and seeing that therapy session that Dick had still makes me feel sad for him.

He was friends with everybody and tried to make everyone feel welcome which I think is also very in tune with Dick Robin in comics. He seemed to be learning from everyone and every experience too which was also nice. The Circus episode really showed us another side of Dick, he was being protective of his first family and he was also starting to feel comfortable as a sort of co-leader of the team. He had a very deep connection with his teammates and that was also similar to his relationship in comics with the Titans.

As I said before I really couldn’t enjoy the other two seasons the same way that I did the first but the Dick Grayson that I saw in them was a really cool one, it did give me Outsiders (2003) vibes from those seasons so I am a little bit biased. But I really liked the idea of Dick and Kaldur having this secret plan that could help everyone in the end even though it might have cost them their friends. When that situation repeated itself in the third season I still sided with Dick (and the people that were on “his” team), it really felt like Dick could see the bigger picture of the problems that they were facing, I wouldn’t say that Dick puts the mission in front of everything else though, that’s Batman’s thing. Dick really just wanted everyone to be okay and he saw that people were trying to solve the problem inefficiently, which would eventually get more people hurt. He was very selfless but also realized that by doing what he did he didn’t only help to save the world but he did make some people think twice before trusting him completely.

That last scene where Dick calls everyone for a meeting and he is surprised when everyone shows up is a very Dick Grayson scene, people really understood that as a team leader Nightwing had to make some very difficult decisions so when he called, they all showed up. Bruce saying that Dick commands more respect than he realizes was so true and iconic of him.

One of my favorite episodes was “Private Security” where Dick teamed up with Will, Roy, and Jim harper, it was super fun and it also had some very interesting moments that showed how Dick was grieving the death/disappearance of his friend, and how he needed someone to tell him that he was going to be okay and that there were people who needed training and he was the best option to do it. That interaction between Dick and Will made me remember Dick and Roy’s chat at the beginning of Outsiders (2003).

Overall, I really enjoyed Dick’s characterization in that show, it respected the original material and made Dick a solid character even though he had differences from his comic counterpart.

I have seen very few animated movies from DC that had Dick as a featured character. I watched: Under the Red Hood, Son of Batman, Batman vs Robin, Batman: Bad Blood, Teen Titans: Judas Contract, and Batman: Hush.

In those movies, Dick’s characterization hasn’t been consistent, in each movie they manage to get something right but they butcher everything else. Mostly I enjoy Dick’s interactions with people, he had a fun moment with Damian, Kory, Bruce, and Selina. But he is never the real center of these stories so they kinda throw him to the side and nerf him a bit too much.

In “Bad Blood” he was Batman to Damian’s Robin but that movie didn’t do much for their relationship. He kinda is reduced to Batman’s most loyal friend or something like that, there isn’t much depth to him or his characterization.

He really wasn’t loved or respected in these movies, “Batman vs. Robin” had the Court of Owls as the main enemies but they didn’t use Dick as a plotline, they had Damian and Bruce having a conflict instead.

“Batman: Hush” was a mess, from every point of view, Dick was done dirty in that scene in the cemetery (I can’t really remember if it was a cemetery the place where he got dosed with fear(?) gas and Selina had to save him), he is treated as if he were an unexperienced vigilante, it is very sad to see.

Also, they had this very annoying “trope” where Dick dislocated his shoulder someway, somehow in every movie. I don’t know why that was, but it happened too often.

As you can see, I haven’t watched that much DC animated content so, from what I have seen Dick’s best characterization is the one from Young Justice, I think they did a great job mixing their own version of Dick Grayson with his comic counterpart. They really respected and worked with the original material.

But! “The Lego Batman” needs to have a special mention because this movie was a gift from the gods. This is a masterpiece, it’s Dick Grayson makes my heart melt, I adore that little Robin, he makes me happy. Bruce and Joker’s relationship is a perfect dramatization of what Batman and Joker’s relationship is in comics and I will be forever glad that DC took the initiative and made fun of themselves like that.

It is just the perfect comfort movie!

Another special mention is “Batman: Under the Red Hood” but I am not mentioning it because of Dick’s appearance there, I just think that this movie is neat and amazing and that everyone should watch it. It has Jensen Ackles voicing Jason! Best Jason Todd/Red Hood that we have ever had out of comics!

Anyway, I am sorry it took me so long to answer your ask, I hope you have a marvelous week!

#dick grayson #young justice #nightwing #dc animated universe #dc animation #dc comics #asksss

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linkspooky · 4 years

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Your thoughts on Mai and what her character development is going to be like?

Mai Zen’in is actually an interesting character because she’s actually a subversion of a lot of tropes. She’s not the “bad” twin to Maki’s “good” twin. She’s not defined in accordance to Maki, or how she foils Maki, but rather is a character allowed to have her own conflicts and point of view. When Maki and Mai fight, there’s no winner. Whenever they fight, neither of them are right.

If I were to define Mai’s goal in the story currently and the source of her conflict, I would say it’s all centered around understanding / wanting to be understood. More underneath the cut.

1. The Popular Mean Girl

So Mai puts on a facade of believing herself to be better than others. If you notice she sort of parrots a lot of the attitudes that she’s surrounded by and a lot of the more negative stigma of the Jujutsu world, which is what puts Nobara off of her, Mai reminds Nobara of the villagers who would all turn against Saori instead of thinking for herself.

At first glance it seems Mai not only just mindlessly believes that Yuji was a bad person for eating a cursed finger without even having met him, but that she also belittles her sister, and repeats the same abuse the rest of the Zen’in clan constantly hound Maki with. Rather that protect her sister she turns against her and joins in on the people abusing her.

The Zen’in clan have declared Maki worthless. Mai uses those same insults that Maki’s heard all her life to dig at her.

It looks like Mai is the bad sister for choosing to bully her sister, and repeat the clan’s abuse rather than protect Maki. In Nobara’s perspective it also looks like Mai mindlessly parrots the prejudgices of the jujutsu world without thinking things through or giving others a chance. That’s why she dismisses Yuji as just being a curse that needs to be elimtinated without having even met him. That’s why she looks down on her sister as weak.

However, we learn from Mai’s own perspective that Mai considers Maki to be much stronger than her. Mai never cared about strength, or even becoming a Jujutsu Sorcerer in the first place.

All of this, all of it, is to get at Maki, using the things Maki cares about. Maybe, if Mai is stronger than her, then Maki will notice her. Mai knows Maki at least well enough to know what hurts her, and if she can’t get any of Maki’s positive attention she settles for prodding her until she gets a reaction.

Mai’s feelings come from a place of being cut off emotionally from her sister, and not knowing any longer if her sister even cares about her, and having no clue how to communicate that. Maki and Mai have reacted in completely different ways, Mai conforms to the Zen’in Household and tries to disappear so she won’t get noticed and provoke abuse, whereas Maki actively rebels.

Which is why we see that the Mai displayed on the surface, bitchy mean girl, and the Mai we know who believes Maki to be much stronger than her, and her own self to be completely lacking are so different. As Momo said, Mai is intentionally playing to the expectations of everyone around her, because Mai seems to be the only valuable Zen’in heir present in the next generation. (The blood could be drying up like it did with Kamo, this would explain why they were even willing to buy Megumi from Toji).

Mai hides herself and tries to conform to the household’s desires in order to avoid criticism, this is given as the reason for her personality, bitchy on the outside, quiet, cowardly and intropsective on the inside.

Maki decided to leave the household, Mai stayed inside. However, Maki left without telling Mai, or even considering how she would react. Which is Mai’s problem to begin with, Maki has no understanding of her sister, and doesn’t really consider her in her actions.

Mai feels like an afterthought to Maki, who is her only real family. There’s a lot Maki doesn’t know about her sister, or even try to know. She’s surprised that Mai could have a friend like Miwa, because she thinks Mai is nasty and disagreeable. She doesn’t know anything at all about Mai’s cursed technique or her way of fighting.

Basically while it seems like Mai is the buly. Mai is actually far more invested in their relationship, and thinks about Maki far more than her sister thinks of her. It must be an incredibly lonely thing to not be understood by your only real family. They are both sort of awful to each other.

As to Mai’s future developemnt, I would say her greatest character flaw is her inability to communicate. She has a right to resent Maki for leaving her behind and not asking her to come with, but it’s clear Mai wants to have a sister, and resorting to bullying, and belitting her to get her attention is just going to push her away further ultimately.

In other words Mai’s attitude isn’t doing her any favors. Her empty lashing out is just serving to drive Mai farther and farther away and giving her the opposite of what she wants. The lashing out in the first place is an unhealthy behavior, and comes from another flaw of Mai’s.

Mai is ultimately a coward, which is why she lives with her head down. Maki confronts, Mai hides. I think part of her reason for spiting Maki so much for leaving is that she lost her person to hide behind. Of course, Mai isn’t going to overcome the abusive nature of the Zen’in household on her own even if she did directly confront her abuse. Mai’s timid nature is a direct reaction to abuse, and also an internalization of the idea that she is worthless because she has been living inside the Zen’in household and dealing with that treatment all her life.

Mai however doesn’t really fight for anything she wants. She always hides behind lies by denying what she really wants. She doesn’t want to become a Jujutsu Sorcerer, but she does it anyway. She thinks Maki is strong, but constantly belittles herself as weak anyway.

Mai is emotionally weak in the sense that she can’t be honest herself or her own emotoins. Her behavior of lashing out comes from a place of not being able to face her own vulnerability. Maki is like this too, to an extent, Maki just ignores her feelings of weakness by pushing them aside, Mai blames everyone else around her. It’s Maki’s fault that she’s weak, because Maki is better than her.

So, in a sense.

Mai is sort of resigned to being weak. She doesn’t really want to become a jujutsu sorcerer, but she’s pressured to become one because of the expectations of everyone around her, and she doesn’t even try that hard. To the point where, even if she’s serious at something like trying to beat Maki, she fails.

So basically to move forward as a character Mai would have to realize what she wants and fight for that. If she wants to not become a Jujutsu Sorcerer, then she has to genuinely quit. If she wants to repair her relationship with her sister, or air her grievances, she actually has to try to do that rather than relying on attention grabbing tactics and hoping Maki will just guess what’s wrong.

Mai’s main problem is because she’s pressured by the house around her into doing things she doesn’t really want to do, she kind of only puts a half-effort into everything she does.

Mai actually has an insanely powerful cursed ability, she can create something out of nothing. However, Mai is willfully weak. She doesn’t really want to try to get strong like Maki, so she’s not pushing herself to use this technique to the best of her ability.

However, Mai has the ability to form close relatoinships with others much like the rest of the Kyoto kids. This can be the impetus from her growth. After all now all of the Kyoto school are reeling from both the loss of Mechamaru, and also the reason he died. He dismissed all of them as weak, and tried to fight on his own instead.

This is a good push to make Mai realize what she wants. She thought she was okay with being looked down as weak if it meant she could keep her head down, live a normal life, and be spared the abuse of her household. However, i think Mai’s strong point is her introspective nature nd her ability to connect with others. (Unlike Mai who is distant from others, and kind of thick headed). Miwa gets along with Mai just fine, and Momo is even willing to fight a complete stranger to defend Mai’s point of view and try to get somebody else to understnad Mai. It’s clear Mai is close with these people in ways Maki is not.

I think Maki is going to realize soon that if she wants to stay close to these people, it’s something she’s going to have to fight for as well. That her attitude of just wishing Maki would fall with her is the wrong one, because they could have been fighting together instead.

#Anonymous #mai zein #maki zenin #zenin mai #zenin maki #nobara kugisaki #kugisaki nobara #jjk meta #metasks

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spookyceph · 4 years

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Rating: Teen and up

Crossposted on Ao3

Day 1 | Prompt: Fantasy

A Small Price to Pay

Appearing unremarkable was an underrated skill. So many people wasted their lives scrambling to be noticed. They traded away their dignity and sense for scraps of fame or fortune as if it would change their fate. Nobles, beggars, warlords, courtesans, criminals, heroes—they all wound up feeding the worms in the end. Tomura would know. He’d sent more than one of each category to their graves with a dagger slipped through the ribs.

The man who’d just strolled through the open tavern door, however, couldn’t have avoided attention even if he’d been making an effort. He wore all black, for one thing. The only variety came from the iron studs glittering across the shoulders and on the half-sleeves of his long leather coat. Even his disheveled hair had been dyed—that shade of coal couldn’t be natural. Like most not in Tomura’s line of work, he probably believed black was the ideal color for stealth. In truth, an entire outfit declared, Look! I’m up to no good and I think I’m being sneaky about it! Clothing in a drab, washed-out brown, like the threadbare cloak Tomura had draped around his shoulders, actually worked best. With wisps of his white hair sticking out from the hood, he’d easily be taken for an old drunk nodding off over his drink. No one of note. Certainly not the heir to the most feared assassins’ guild in the empire.

The stranger approached the bar. His step hesitated for a split second when faced with the rippling construct of shadow—a guild contact by the name of Kurogiri—who was tending it. Tomura channeled his energy into a bouncing leg as the pair conversed. After a minute or two, Kurogiri fetched a wooden cup and filled it with the tavern’s finest for the man in black, who must have given all the correct pass phrases because he turned and looked directly at Tomura’s corner.

His flashy clothing was nothing compared to his skin.

Initially, Tomura thought he was staring at raw, purple muscle stretched over the stranger’s forearms, neck, and lower half of his face. Not flayed, he realized several stunned seconds later. Burned. Some disaster or curse had charred his skin in impossibly symmetrical patches. Even more striking were the neat rows of slim silver rings running along the seams, binding living and ruined flesh. They flaunted what might have been a disfigurement as decoration instead. To anyone with a taste for the macabre, the effect came across as artistic. Even beautiful.

Tomura hated him instantly. Still, he regulated his breathing and didn’t allow his hands to lift from the table to scratch his neck while the ostentatious bastard meandered his way to the table to join him. Master All For One had entrusted him with assembling the team that would eventually topple the empire. If he meant to take over the guild one day—meant to rid the world of hypocrites and bootlickers like Yagi Toshinori, the Emperor’s Champion—he would need to deal with people he didn’t care for. Nothing would get done if he just shut himself in his room and played out ancient battles with maps and models forever.

The man in black stopped at the chair to Tomura’s left, resting long, slender fingers on its back. The blue of his eyes shone as bright as the center of the flame in the tin oil lamp sitting on the table.

“Evening. Mind if I join you?” His voice shared none of the swagger of his appearance. Low and soft, Tomura had to strain to hear it.

“If I did,” he snapped, patience frayed along the edges, “you’d be on the floor already, choking on your own blood.”

This warm welcome only made the man smile, silver rings pulling at scar tissue. He sat and made the mistake of actually drinking the ale.

Now here was something to cheer him up. A nasty grin stretched Tomura’s own scar, slashed straight down the side of his cracked lips. “How is it?”

The stranger tilted his head, peering into his cup as if he’d caught something swimming in it. “I think the only thing more likely to kill me is the water.” Regardless, he took another swig.

Bah. No fun after all. Mouth sagging into a grimace, Tomura pushed his own cup away just a bit more. “So. You’re the flame mage looking to tag along on the job.”

“Afraid so. Call me Dabi. And you’re the dreaded Shigaraki Tomura, protégé of the most feared criminal overlord in the empire.”

“The same. What makes you think you’d be any use to me, Lord Call-Me-Dabi? Looking at you, I’d say your spells blow up in your face more often than they hit your enemies.”

To his credit and Tomura’s further exasperation, the mage didn’t lunge at the bait. “If only it were that simple. My scars,” he lifted his rough, pitted arms, turning them over and back for display, “are the result of my father making a deal with a demon.”

Tomura had to catch himself before he looked Dabi directly in the face and revealed too much of his own. “Your father did what?”

That earned a wagging finger. “I’ll tell you the story…but only in exchange for answering a question about your own past.”

Unease played with the hair along the back of Tomura’s neck. “Let’s hear this question first.”

“Fair enough. I want to know whether it’s true you’re cursed to destroy anything you touch.”

Muscles knotting down his spine, Tomura stiffened. How did this flashy asshole know more about his past than Sensei’s own network of informants had been able to dig up on him? Was he lying about the demon story just to get Tomura to talk? For what purpose? He couldn’t determine an advantage for doing so. But…since he already knew about the curse there didn’t seem to be any use in hiding it. Anyway, maybe his reaction would reveal further clues.

Reaching out with his left hand and keeping his right on one of the daggers sheathed against his ribcage, Tomura touched Dabi’s cup with all five fingers. A series of soft crackles filled the silence as the wood split apart first along the grain, then into individual fibers before disintegrating into a powdery ash that plopped to the table as a pile of mush when combined with the ale. The mage’s eyes became as round and shiny as marbles.

“Fascinating.” He lifted one of his own half-scarred hands. Instead of curiously poking the mound of pulp, though, Dabi went for Tomura’s wrist. His fingers brushed skin, warmer than the sunlight it rarely encountered, before Tomura recoiled.

“Are you insane?”

“Depends who you ask.”

Two fingers carefully folded against his palms, Tomura tucked his hands under his elbows and shoved away suddenly intrusive thoughts of what the mage’s touch might feel like on other parts of him. “How did you hear I’m cursed?”

Dabi chuckled, low and deep and quiet like his voice. The sound sent a little thrill racing out from Tomura’s belly to the crown of his head before plummeting straight down to the tips of his toes, which curled in his boots. Bastard. He had to be using some sort of enchantment to enhance his voice. Had to. “So many questions. Information is too valuable to just give away, though. You of all people should know that.”

Tomura’s jaw clenched hard enough to make his teeth squeak. “What do you want?”

“Nothing much—the answer ties in with your initial question, actually. A kiss should cover it.”

The remaining cup of ale tipped over and splashed its contents across the table as Tomura sprang up, jostling the edge.

“You want what?” He could sense the eyes of the handful of other patrons in the tavern locked on him from the outburst. Kurogiri, surely, must have been staring at him like he’d lost his mind. But Tomura couldn’t stop gawking at Dabi, who, despite an amused quirk of the brows, didn’t appear to be joking.

“A kiss in exchange for information,” the mage said. “To be collected in private, at your earliest convenience, of course. A more than agreeable price, if you ask me.”

For the first time in his life, Tomura was left speechless. “Wha…but…you…”

“’Why a kiss’, you ask?”

“Yes.”

Dabi’s shoulders bobbed in a shrug. “There’s already plenty of gold to be had for accepting this job from the guild. Ten tablets of gold upon completion, wasn’t it? A story about kissing a deadly assassin and living to tell the tale, though? Much harder to come by. Anyway, it seems fitting. I tell you something interesting about my past and you give me a new tidbit to share in the future.”

“You’re out of your mind.”

“I thought we already touched on that subject.” Leathery forearms folded on the table, the mage craned forward. “So? How about it?”

Realizing how far his common sense had flown from him, Tomura yanked his hood closer around his face and plopped back into his seat. He began snagging his thoughts out of the cyclone of emotion that had swept them up. From a purely practical view, Dabi lost in this bargain. Even if everything he said turned out to be a pile of unicorn shit, Tomura could still learn something from the telling itself. There had to be a hidden angle to this farce. A ploy to see his face fully and sell a description to the authorities? Hardly the easiest, most efficient way to go about it. An attempt to get Tomura alone and off guard to exact revenge? Plausible. He’d killed dozens of people, including two mages, in his career. There was no reason one of them couldn’t have been a friend or relative of Dabi’s. Giving the mage what he wanted, keeping him close, was an ironclad way to find out. A bit of pride was a small price to pay to destroy an enemy with their own trap.

And if paranoia had made something out of nothing…he could always kill Dabi anyway rather than live it down.

Tomura sniffed. “Fine. I agree to your insane terms. Now answer my questions.”

A sliver of white, straight teeth glimmered in the mage’s smile. Tomura had to rein in his imagination before it ran away with picturing them leaving bite marks all over his neck. “The reasons this story happened at all are rather prosaic, I’m afraid. My father was a powerful flame mage who wanted to be above all other warriors. Wanted to be the Emperor’s Champion, in fact. He fought in tournaments and dueled noble-funded contenders, beating every opponent, rising quickly through the lists despite being only twenty-five. Then he faced the man who would become his life-long rival. No matter how many times my father challenged him, he could never best him. So, not getting any younger, he changed tactics and decided to have a perfect child capable of beating this better man.”

Turning just enough to peek at Dabi past his hood and messy hair, Tomura snorted. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Told you the motivations were uninspired.”

“Don’t tell me he summoned a demon woman to bear him this perfect child.”

“The circumstances of my birth aren’t half so interesting, sadly.” Lacing his hands behind his head, Dabi leaned back in his chair until it was balancing only on two legs. “No, my father scoured noble families for any daughters with promising magical talent. Eventually, he wound up marrying an unlucky woman from a line of ice mages and she had me not long after. I inherited my father’s power over fire, but apparently not to the god-like levels he’d been hoping for. When ten years of trying to beat greatness into me didn’t produce results, he turned to alternative methods.

“I’ll spare you the gory details, but the old bastard summoned a demon with the authority to make the type of deal he wanted. He offered it my soul in exchange for augmenting my power. And now…”

With a flourish of one hand, flames the same brilliant blue of his eyes rippled up from Dabi’s fingertips. Heat slapped Tomura in the face even from that distance, sucking the breath straight from his lungs. Another flick of the wrist and the mage clenched his hand, snuffing the fiery ribbons.

“My flames burn hot enough to melt steel—hotter than any mortal can cast. Therein laid the problem and the demon’s trick. My new powers were too intense for a fourteen-year-old boy to withstand, let alone control. The attempt broke me, leaving me severely burned over most of my body and on the verge of death. In his infinite wisdom and mercy, my father declared me a failure. He sent me away to a monastery to ‘recover’. Really, he figured my injuries would finish me off and the demon would have its prize early. Fortunately, I’m more resilient than he gave me credit for.”

Despite Dabi’s casual, even flippant tone and posture, something in his eyes told Tomura that maybe this story—the core of it anyway—wasn’t a complete fabrication. Something within the burning-blue irises too cold and hard for even them to melt. “Not only did I pull through, I learned ways to protect myself somewhat from my own magic thanks to the monks and their connections to various rare book sellers and libraries. By the time my father sent someone—perhaps one of yours even—to finish what my injuries hadn’t, I was ready. I spent about another five years after that in hiding, accumulating knowledge and skill. Skills like breaking wards, or getting minor spirits to collect tidbits of information, such as a curse placed on an infamous assassin, say. When I finally had the strength, I summoned the demon who’d traded with my father and renegotiated the terms of the deal.

“See, promising somebody else’s soul, especially a child’s, is tricky when you don’t just outright sacrifice them. Comes with all sorts of cosmic snags. Rather than risk winding up empty-handed, the demon was willing to heal me as much as it was able and accept my father’s soul instead for services rendered. The next week, I delivered.”

Slowly, Dabi let his chair rock forward back onto all four legs. At the same instant, the scales in Tomura’s mind tipped as well.

“Fine. You’re on the job. Ten tablets of gold before, as you already heard. Thirty after. You cooperate with everyone else on the team, no exceptions, no complaints. Agreed?”

Dabi bowed as much as the table would allow. “I’m at your service.”

“Hmph. We’ll see if it’s worth anything soon enough. Are you familiar with the old entertainment district on the west side of the city?”

“I’ve kept an appointment or two over that way.”

“Do you know the fountain?”

The mage tapped his scarred chin. “Dried up, statue of a fox woman, lots of crude writing all over it?”

“That’s the one. Be there at sunset two days from now. Be on time or don’t bother to show up at all. I’ll take you to meet the rest of the rabble helping with this venture.”

“Perfect. And about that remaining payment—”

Tomura stood from his chair abruptly. “You’ll get it when I say so. Don’t push me or you’ll wind up with a blade through your windpipe instead.”

“I look forward to it.” Smiling, Dabi offered his hand across the table. “Working with you, that is. Not the slashed throat so much.”

He didn’t even glance down at the gesture of goodwill. “We’re complete opposites then.”

That parting barb still wasn’t enough to stifle the soft laugh that followed Tomura as he strode away, pretending not to notice the strange fluttering in his middle.

#shigadabiweek2020 #shigadabi #shigadabi fic #shigadabi fanfic #dabi x shigaraki #shigaraki x dabi #shigaraki tomura #dabi #fantasy au

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pcgamepure09 · 3 years

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Extraordinary and Bad in Gaming

Gaming is most likely the best diversion and even livelihoods in the world. People wreck around for amusement just or learning while others record accounts about the games. In this article, I will focus in extra on gaming itself and less the side of how to make gaming accounts. Gamers come in each exceptional age, genders, religions, regions and shapes. The establishments of people who are gamers make gaming extensively more fun.

Establishments of gamers can have an effect in the sort of games that people play. There are a wide scope of blends for different arrangements relating to the sort of games and kind of gamers. You really need to look at the game's site to get every one of the proper information prior to buying PC Game Pure .

There are various online stages where you can buy games from like Steam or Humble Bundle. Those districts will give you the portrayal, accounts by the association, pictures, customer and non-customer marks, reviews, site, association and their social account(s). Realize the game's site likely will not show you all that you require to know. As a base, a gaming association will show a short endeavor to make it happen depiction, restricted amount of pictures (5, most ideal situation, several accounts by them and their social records. The most they will give is an illuminating portrayal, their social records, customer studies and accounts by them.

We should make a dive straightforwardly into what is viewed as negative with respect to gaming. The greater part of the cynical things about games come from the certifiable people on those games, the kind of games and the sorts of games for some unsuitable person. A game can be bad quality yet it's not by and large the circumstance where the real game is horrendous. It might be where it was some unsuitable kind of game for some inadmissible person. This is where the classes come in. Perhaps a game has a bit of mercilessness. That doesn't make it horrendous; it basically makes it some inadmissible kind of game for a seven year old. Of course maybe you bought a conundrum game for a person who loves movement type games. So the movement loving individual won't see the value in it, yet that doesn't make the conundrum game terrible!

The sorts of games are ceaseless from bareness, meds and alcohol, detestability, wagering with money to say the very least. These different sorts aren't ideal for youth gamers similarly as misguided for people who could do without seeing such things.

Gaming has incredible and awful sides really like the wide range of various things. The key is the means by which extraordinary and dreadful are those sides. For example, a couple of games have an awful side with players that like to fight a ton. This is typical in games. Appreciate for a huge load of gamers this is surely not a big deal; in any case, for youth who are new to the game or regardless, gaming in general this can be disillusioning. There are times when you need to avoid the awful sides all together. There are times when the incredible balances the awful. Accepting this happens and there are no issues with the real game; the awful side is just that one insignificant fly in your room which is no big deal. Alert: If the horrendous balances the incomparable, I would unequivocally recommend avoiding that game.

Another viewpoint that people will disturb a game architect or creator about is depiction. Should I say, a shortfall of depiction which isn't confined to race, body type and message in the game. Accepting you can change your individual, clearly you will not dislike depiction. There is an issue in specific games where they don't address strong and sharp females, minority females and folks, immense, little, tall, and short females and folks. Notice how I didn't put "folks" after female for strong? That is because folks in games are ALWAYS tended to as strong and insightful.

In games that show a male strong and quick, he will generally likely be white, tall, unstable, superstar looking and buff. You will inconsistently see him be a minority, short, stout, not buff, quirky looking, while at this point being strong and sharp. You see this even LESS for females. A couple of females in games are also white, tall, feeble and strong while showing skin like no tomorrow. You simply see THESE females in MMORPG games (Massively Multiplayer online Role Playing Game) be that as it may. RPG games are planned for lala lands where you for the most part fight people and monsters. Clearly the females' subtleties will be strong anyway they won't look strong.

In many games, when they add an individual for you to play they for the most part add a white male first, then a white female, then a dim male, and a short time later a dim female. They don't even really add people who are mixes of races or in the center. With respect to the dull characters they simply add one shade of "dim" or "African American" and not many out of each odd person of shading on earth is that shade.

In games, the vast majority of the characters are for each situation unstable and tall. You don't really see characters that are short and feeble, tall and tubby, short and stout, etc There are a numerous people who aren't unstable and who aren't tall.

Then at long last, there is the mental message that goes with the sexual direction, race, and body type. What do I mean by the mental message? A couple of games send a roundabout message in regards to that character being strong and sharp or something else. While for various games it will in general be a mental message either purposefully or not. For example, in the game you play and you see a minority female who is short, full, nerdy looking and her ascribes are to be a dolt, guiltless, and moronic. It could send a mental message to you that people that seem like her are actually similar to her. They're not sharp, they aren't thin, and are not tall. They did incapably in school, et cetera So you start thinking those things subject to not simply seeing this in that game over and over, anyway when it happens in various games also.

The most really terrible part is NONE of these things are legitimate. Without a doubt, certain people aren't shaky, tall, and maybe not unreasonably splendid; but instead not EVERYONE is like this! You do have short stout minorities who are shrewd as anyone might imagine! You have a wide scope of mixes of people who ARE astute! Clearly, this heap of things about sexual direction, race, body type, and messages aren't just in gaming; they're in films, TV shows, advancements, etc Intriguing that a piece of the producers who make the games, movies, TV shows, advancements, etc, are minorities themselves and they make up the quantity of occupants in the earth. (Search "all out people by race 2016" and click the underlying three associations if you don't confide in me.)

Fast disclaimer: I AM NOT BASHING ANYONE! Without a doubt, I was hollering that. This section of the article is referencing to you what I know, read, hear and experience in gaming.

If you don't believe me go gander at the current TV shows, movies, commercials, and games. A show to look at for extraordinary depiction is Milo Murphy's Law. Two games to look at as a wellspring of viewpoint for extraordinary depiction are OverWatch and Atlas Reactor. By and by in these fields it has improved for depiction unequivocally sex, race and as of late starting body type (expressly in a particular request). A couple of games even add robots and creatures as playable characters to do whatever it takes not to have issues with depiction. This kills the issue of customers requiring an individual to address their genuine or supported sexual direction, race, or body type since now there is an individual most customers can yield to. In light of everything, it's impractical to fulfill everyone.

OK, since I ranted and moved the awful stuff; we ought to get into the incredible bits of gaming! You have gamers as energetic as three years old and as old as 90+! Despite your age, race, sex, religion, culture, or region gaming can be valuable for anyone. Gaming can not solely be fun, yet productive and enlightening.

A benefit with gaming is it can help youth with having more confidence in themselves and be all the more cordial. If they play an online multiplayer game and talk with various players all through the planet, this can help then with becoming familiar with bantering with others other than family and they procure trust in what they're saying. They can go from a smart individual to a social fan! It can happen fast or progressively. Whether or not it's everything except a game anyway a spot for gamers, trained professionals, style originators, vehicle darling, etc to talk; it will regardless help them with being all the more well disposed. Recollect in any case, creating to someone and thereafter voice visiting to someone are two novel experiences. Youth can be incredibly amicable when creating yet especially meek when voice visiting.

#PC Game Pure

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waterbearwaltz · 3 years

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Offering

For @flashfictionfridayofficial | Prompt: Sweet Surprise | Word count: 1034

Bix hurries through the crowd, one hand tight around the small parcel in her pocket. She’s sure no one saw her swipe it, but still. She can’t believe such a plain little lump is so valuable. It looked like a brown stone worn smooth by the river. Well. The point isn’t how it looks, or even how it tastes. This is a gift. An offering.

She ducks into an alley, darting smoothly between dilapidated buildings, feet deft and light on the uneven stones. Most people can’t navigate the city. Anyone who goes off the main road gets hopelessly swallowed by the mangled, shifting streets. Uhar is mostly dead ends on the best of days, and the days have been getting worse and worse.

Her grandmother tells stories of cities planned and built by people, neat grids of buildings and avenues, stones that don’t reach for your feet as you pass. Bix finds this hard to believe. A city is a twisted, hungry thing. But she is hungry too. She likes to think they understand each other.

Bix is so far into the city’s heart that even seasoned Uharis would start to lose their way now. Not her though. She’s the best navigator around, everyone says. When work is scarce she leads traders in and out of the city. It’s dangerous work, but not for the reason people think. Bix could never get lost here, has never, even as a child. But traders are unpredictable, and some are more than willing to harm a young, unarmed woman.

Unarmed. She never feels that way, out here. She remembers blood on the gravel, stones sharpening with her fear, buildings collapsing like a mudslide into the street, sweeping away everything but her.

She finally spots her destination. Before Uhar grew up out of the desert, there was another city here, and this was its center. Instead of the dark Augite of Uhar-proper, the buildings here are a strange, off-white stone, pockmarked and porous and smelling faintly of salt. Bix enters the building, hand in her pocket, fingering the chocolate.

The temple is all tarnished gold and fabric that might have been red once. The old city had their own gods, and even after years of exploring the ruins, Bix still can’t parse them. The people seem to have worshiped some strange form of geometry. The intricate, folding shapes on the walls make her head swim.

He is here, of course. He is always here. Trapped, she thinks, though he has never said. The tense air near the altar makes her skin crawl, and she knows this is his anger the same way she knows the paths she took to get here are, at this very moment, churning up and settling into new positions.

“I have something for you,” she calls out. She doesn’t think he’d hurt her, but no sense in sneaking up on him. You can never be too careful with a god. She assumes. He is the only god she has met.

He stays silent, so she approaches him, pulling the scarf off her hair and shaking the dust from it. After a moment’s hesitation, she rests a hand on his shoulder. They have touched before, rarely. When her father died she hid here for three days, curled on the dusty floor, crying until she was spent and then sleeping like a dead thing. There was a jug of water and some bread beside her when she woke. His hand on her shoulder. He didn’t speak, but she faintly remembers soft humming in the dark.

“Don’t you want to see what it is?” She presses the package into his hands and waits. Or tries to wait, and gives up when he simply blinks up at her in faint surprise. “It’s an offering,” she explains. “Like in the stories. If you want to ask a favor from a god, you need to bring them an offering. Something precious.”

“Precious,” he echos. His voice is like the bones of this place, rough and brittle and vaguely of the sea.

Bix kneels before him, impatient, though by his standards he’s being pretty responsive. She unfolds the paper in his hands and reveals the hunk of brown, gone slightly soft in the heat of the day.

“Do you know what it is?” she continues. “The confectioner says it’s called chocolate. They make it for the councillors, but I stole some.”

“You bring me an offering you stole?”

“Well, I’m asking you to steal something for me. I thought it was fitting.” Actually she thought it was her only option, but that’s not as poetic.

“You know I’m not a god, don’t you?”

Bix frowns. She isn’t stupid. “Of course I know that. But you’re the closest thing I have. And I need help.”

“What is it you want?”

“What happened here, to this place, before the city...shifted?” Bix doesn’t have the words for this. She’s never had to. Other people can’t feel the city like she can. She does her best. “It’s happening again.”

He seems to understand, nodding slowly, eyes unfocused. She leans into his view to pull him back. He’ll drift for days like that if she lets him. He looks very sad, suddenly. It makes him seem almost human.

“Yes,” is all he says.

“Can you stop it?” She’s annoyed at the fear in her voice. She’d planned on saying this differently, confident and formal with her little offering. Like the Uhari priestesses, steady and wise and irrefutable. Instead she is herself, crouching on the floor of a dead temple, damp with sweat and swallowing at the tightness in her throat.

He cocks his head at her. “I thought you wanted me to steal something?”

“I do. This...shift. It’s because something new is…I don’t know...growing. Something that will take the life out of Uhar, like Uhar took the life from this place.” He looks even more surprised now, and much, much sadder. “I want you to steal that away, and give it back to Uhar.”

He fingers the chocolate silently, and Bix lets out a frustrated sigh. “Can you do it or not?”

For the first time, he meets her gaze. “I can try.”

#Flash Fiction Friday #flashfiction #writeblr #like everything i write this is basically a weak tit nk jemison impression #not atla

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pocket-void · 4 years

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Bro I am a sucker for world building, just read any of my AU's to see that lol. But if you like questions, the the SoH AU, how do they meet each other. I can imagine they all have a common goal it seems, well most, to stop the war and bring peace. But, I can also imagine that they do NOT trust each other.

World building is my absolute JAM! I can honestly do it forever, it’s just really fun crafting societies and worlds for stories to take place in, y’know? ^///^ It’s probably one of the reasons I like D&D so much.

But anyways, yes, you are absolutely correct! Everyone is more or less on the same page, but the main conflict centers around how they interact with each other! Character interaction based stories are my absolute favorites, and the SoH AU is mostly just interpersonal conflict. Can they work together to successfully reunite the kingdoms? Will the courts crush the rebellion before they reach that agreement? Or will they perhaps inadvertently destroy each other in the process? OOooh drama, one of my favorite flavors of it no less. o///o

I’ll give you a general plot run down I guess? Focusing on when they actually meet instead of like, actual plot threads. (This story has way too many layers, but what thing I make doesn’t at this point-) I wasn’t planning on putting tons of thought into this currently, but since you’re curious I’ll tell ya what I’ve got. ^///^

If this were a comic or fic, the story would be broken up into various points of views and basically tell different parts of the story at different times. Eventually everything gets pieced together by the climax, but we’re getting ahead of ourselves. Please note that these notes are out of order, but here’s how each of them eventually meet up:

Janus is the first person to meet everybody in the story at least once, under various different aliases thanks to his shapeshifting ability

He doesn’t approve of a lot of them

Mostly because they either seem unsuited for their cause or completely unwilling to cooperate

He thinks Roman is dangerous

He knows Logan is powerful but untrusting

He thinks Patton is valuable but soft

He and Virgil just flat out don’t get along

Patton and Virgil don’t realize that they’ve met Janus somewhere before when he’s introduced later

Logan and Roman do notice, but don’t really mention it

Well, Roman does, but like, vaguely and ominously for the aesthetic

---

Janus and Remus met a long long time ago. They’ve known each other for years.

They met in the land of Diamonds, which was strange because Remus is a Clover.

He claims to be a runaway since he was young, though Janus finds that a little odd regardless.

They become pretty decent friends, and eventually skedaddle out of Diamond territory together once Janus gets cursed and is officially branded a traitor to the court

Eventually JOKER is formed and they’ve had eachother’s backs ever since. Though admittedly Janus doesn’t really know a whole lot about Remus in the grand scheme of things.

---

Remus kind of goes around acting like a wanted criminal very often; he has absolutely no fear

He is in fact Roman’s twin, their parents were of two suits and so they ended up being like that too

Unfortunately that causes a lot of problems when you’re a Clover in the Land of Diamonds, so he ended up being hidden away for safety a lot until he just ran off.

Remus’ core is actually unstable, which is why nobody (Not even himself) can figure out what his rank is

Patton eventually figures that out but he isn’t sure if there was a way to fix that

Honestly Remus thinks it’s super cool like that

He meets Logan by attempting to con him, but it ends up with them getting into an even larger scheme and busting some sort of underground trading ring

Logan thinks he’s insufferable, but a Clover is more bearable than a Diamond any day

---

Somewhere in the beginning in the Kingdom of Spades Logan comes to the realization of just how corrupt the higher court truly is.

He blows up at a higher ranking official for making clearly lackluster and inefficient decisions to manipulate and twist things in their favor and simultaneously quits and gets exiled for this. (Literally just “You can’t fire me, I quit”)

Well actually the court can’t just let him walk off like that, and basically try to get him assassinated

He realizes something is off and anticipates the ambush, but he’s still terribly outnumbered and gets really wounded, though he manages to escape into Hearts territory where he collapses in the snow and gets found by Patton

---

Patton’s workshop is in a really obscure alleyway, and there’s metal cuff latched onto his right wrist. He’s basically under house arrest for his history of trying to harbor fugitives.

He finds Logan during an outing and takes him in like a good Samaritan of course

Logan is still in his scholarly robes and so he’s instantly identifiable as a Spade, not that Patton wouldn’t find out regardless but still

Patton heals his wounds as best he can while Logan rests, since he was out in the snow for quite a while

Logan bolts up and almost causes a scene when he finally wakes, and Patton has to convince him he won’t turn him in to the high court

They don’t get along the best until Logan lowers his guard a little and figures out a way for Patton to escape house arrest (He fiddles with the bracelet along with Patton’s soul smithing abilities, not going in to the science of that rn)

Logan stays with Patton while he figures out his next course of action

He admittedly respects Patton’s profession and finds it very interesting, since the Spade court lacks a lot of info on the matter

---

Virgil has actually dueled Janus on a few occasions, and the main reason is mostly just because they don’t get along. He finds the man untrustworthy, which is a fair assessment ngl.

He meets Remus under better circumstances

They meet one day while Virgil is on patrol, since Remus is a Clover he’s the one in charge of doing errands in Clover territory

They get along alright and Virgil admits to him that he doesn’t think the high courts are doing what’s right for the people

Remus uses that opportunity to kind of nudge him into doing rebellion stuff, which Virgil actually declines

He does set out on a personal quest soon after though, and resigns from his position as a guard

It raises a few suspicions in the court, and a lot of people were against his choice, but Virgil was firm and he left before anyone could say anything more

He meets Logan somewhere down the line in Hearts territory with Patton, they’re pretty snippy with each other in the beginning

The three stay together at Patton’s for a while and are almost busted twice before deciding to leave

Patton stays at first but eventually he joins their plans to rebel and save the people, since he knows how much they’ve been suffering under the court’s rule

---

Roman gets a few visits sprinkled in various parts of the story

He meets Janus rather early, who visits him to ask for his assistance

It doesn’t work out very well

Janus is challenged to a duel, but because of the curse inflicted on him he was in no condition to fight a King ranked individual

He promises to find Roman a suitable opponent, to which Roman agrees to help the cause if Janus manages to do so

Virgil kind of stumbles upon his castle while travelling and gets roped into a bizarre tea party where Roman just kind of complains to him the whole time

Roman doesn’t take the Jack seriously but he enjoys company regardless

They quip a lot and kind of become friends, and Roman leaves him with some ominous words about the future and bids him farewell

Somewhere down the line Logan goes to formally challenge Roman to a duel, and they have quite possibly the most ridiculous and wild fight that ends in half of Roman’s castle in rubble and the Diamond court having a massive collective headache

Logan earns Romans respect and they settle stuff over tea

And those are my scattered and bare bone ideas written for you at 2:20 AM in the morn. o///o

#Obviously the story is better structures than that #but it's late and I'm having a t i m e #I kind of accidentally started formulating how the actual plot will be structured #but that's not gonna be touched upon because as much as I enjoy this AU #It's a really big story and probably needs a ton of polish #and better planning #but I do enjoy it a lot #there's some cool scenes and lots of developments #political drama is not my strong suit but inner turmoil is fascinating on a big scale #I love character stuff the most tho hahaha #sanders sides #sanders sides au #SoH au #jadespeedster17 #ask

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good-doctor-imagine · 4 years

Text

Scar » one

Pairing: Richie Tozier x Fem!Reader

Summary: You thought you were leaving everything behind when you moved to Derry. Turns out, you were wrong. (soulmate au)

Word Count: 2410

A/N: I’m so excited to post the first part to this! I’ve been writing it for the past couple of days and it’s gotten so long that I decided to split it into a few parts. I hope you all like it! <3

You had no clue why your parents wanted to move to Derry, Maine so abruptly. It wasn't like there was much opportunity in a small town like that. Actually, you did know. Your dad got transferred because of the increase in missing kids cases and the Derry police force needed extra hands. Now that you look at it, you understood the need to move but you couldn't wrap your head around why they would move. You were a kid for God's sake. If there was an increase in missing kids cases, then why would they bring you along?

You tried arguing that your dad should go and work until the cases were solved. Of course, being the thirteen-year-old you were, they wouldn't listen to your argument. Instead, they insured you that you were in good hands, your father was a police officer and the whole town had a 7 pm curfew to ensure the safety of its citizens.

Scoffing, you went back to your room, slamming the door behind you to show your disappointment. It was August, right before you started school again. The summer was spent outside with your friends, riding bikes until the sun set, splashing in rivers until you were soaked. Nothing could have prepared you for the sudden goodbye. You tried not to show your heartbreak as you hugged your best friend for the last time, holding each other for what seemed like hours.

To put it lightly, you were pissed. You didn't even attempt to hide your disappointment in the backseat of your dad's Ford Sierra, giving short answers every time your parents asked you a question. It took so much of you not to roll your eyes when your dad told you to behave. Sure, you were being a brat, but your life was ripped away from you in a matter of 3 days. Three days ago your parents told you were moving. Two days ago you said goodbye to some of your closest friends. One day ago, you were packing your bags, your best friend helping you pack the most valuable items that you've accumulated over the years. Birthday gifts, goofy polaroids, and treasured memories were being stuffed into containers, turning into just some cherished moments of your life.

Now, you were on the road to start your new life. You didn't want a new life, all you wanted was to go back home and spend time with your friends. As you sat in the back seat, your head rested on your right hand. Subconsciously, your gaze traveled to the inside of your left hand. There was a scar that showed up a few days ago, a long jagged mark across the palm of your hand. The moment you saw it, you knew it was from your soulmate. You tried to recall what happened that day, wondering if you slid your hand on a rock and scratched it, but you never remembered the pain. Your skin wasn't bothered either, it was just a dark mark across your skin.

A part of you was relieved knowing that your soulmate was there. Besides the scar on your left hand, there was nothing on your body to show you that your soulmate existed. Some days you wondered if you even had a soulmate. When you were little, you would search for any tiny mark you could, determined to find a mark that showed you that they were there. After a while, you gave up. You thought if they didn't have a scar now, then you probably didn't have a soulmate.

All of your friends had scars as well. Whether it was from your intense playing and skidding on rocks or just plain roughhousing, everyone had a scar from something. You even had one.

It was easy to miss unless you were looking closely. Being the rambunctious and rebellious toddler you were, you didn't listen to your parents whenever they told you to stop. Before you knew it, a piece of glass from a wine glass your mom dropped a few seconds earlier was buried in the bottom of your foot. Although it was pretty light, a line was drawn on the center of your foot, a permanent marker of your rebellious action.

Being able to see your soulmate's scar was comforting and nerve-racking. The conflicting emotions made your head spin. One part of you was so elated that there was confirmation that you had a soulmate. The other part of you was anxious that you just left your soulmate. Ever since you were a child, you would create scenarios where you would find your soulmate outside your house one day. In one scenario, they were your new neighbor, knocking on your front door to introduce themselves. In another, they ran into you as you were biking with your friend. Your favorite scenario was meeting your soulmate in the arcade, your relationship starting with a friendly competition. Since you were little, you convinced yourself that your soulmate was back home. Your soulmate was waiting for you back in (Hometown). You balled your left hand into a fist, covering the scar from your view. It was too painful to look at.

When you went to go tell your parents about your newfound scar, a huge grin adorning your face, they told you that you had to move. Before you knew it, your grin fell and disbelief surrounded your whole body. You were just overjoyed knowing that your soulmate was actually alive, but now a sense of dread filled your body. Saying goodbye to all your friends, memories, dreams, and all for what? Your dad's job transfer?

You couldn't have hated the road trip more, clenching your hand into a fist as your parents sat in the front seat, their own hands entwined on the center console.

Richie was a toddler when he attained his first scar. His parents were shocked when they looked at the bottom of his right foot, finding a line etched on his skin. At first, they thought it was some sort of marker that Richie used on his skin but it didn't disappear when they tried to wash it off. Then, they asked their son if he stepped on something sharp while they were at work. Richie shook his head, his mouth slightly hung open in confusion.

Then, it clicked into their minds. Richie's soulmate must have cut their foot somehow. Of course, they would explain it to him later. Trying to explain soulmates to a toddler was not something they wanted to get involved with.

When Richie was 7, his parents finally explained the concept of soulmates to him. They told him about the scar on his foot and how his soulmate would have the same mark. Richie found it a bit weird that soulmates existed, his second-grade mind not able to grasp the concept of loving someone yet. Hell, some boys in his class still believed that girls had cooties. As Richie aged up, he began to understand the concept of soulmates even more. Popular TV shows and movies would contain soulmates, often between two best friends that didn't know they were connected in that way until one of them got injured. People at school started to pay more attention to the marks on their bodies, searching each other for the familiar marks with the hope of finding their other half.

Richie never tried that hard to search for his soulmate. He couldn't exactly go up to someone and say "Let me see the bottom of your feet". He knew that finding his soulmate would be a challenge but he didn't mind that much. He was 13 and wasn't interested in the concept of love. He was too busy entertaining himself with Street Fighter, not to mention the killer clown that he and his friends defeated that summer. The last thing that was on his mind was his soulmate.

All of the losers knew about his soulmate's scar, they all saw it from their frequent visits to the quarry. Eddie and Beverly liked to tease him about it, asking him if he had some kind of foot fetish. Richie ignored their comments and bit back at them. He wasn't bothered by his soulmate's mark and, in fact, he would often forget about it. It wasn't like he could look at it every day, it was on the bottom of his foot and he didn't have much flexibility.

After the defeat of the killer clown, Richie dedicated himself to his game Street Fighter, determined to exceed his highest score from last year. Eddie would join him every few days before complaining about Richie's obsession. Tired of Richie's lack of attention, Eddie decided that he wasn't going to the arcade with Richie that day. Instead, he was going birdwatching with Stanley. Richie didn't hold back his complaints, calling the popular hobby incredibly boring. Eddie wasn't bothered by his words, leaving Richie by himself at the arcade machine.

Your mom kicked you out of the house, giving you some money before sending you out the front door. She was bothered by you spending the rest of your summer indoors so she told you to go out and make some friends. Your mood was sour as you grabbed your bike from the driveway. You remembered passing by an arcade on the way here and decided that it would be the perfect place to go. You could spend your money, play some games, and convince your mom that you made some friends (even if you didn't).

Taking a step in the arcade, you looked around at the people occupying the machines. There weren't that many given the small space. Walking over to the quarter machine, you put in a five dollar bill to get some change. While it was spitting out some coins, you took the time to look at your options. There were a few machines across the wall: a pacman machine, a rampage machine, and a popcorn machine stuffed into the corner. What caught your eye was the Street Fighter machine in the middle of the arcade but there was already a boy occupying it. Taking your quarters out of the machine, you stood back for a while, waiting for the kid to leave the game.

One minute turned to five, then to ten, then to fifteen. By this point, you were getting annoyed. The boy was constantly replaying, entering quarter after quarter to start a new game. Right before he put in the next quarter, you came up behind him and spoke up, your voice sharp.

"Can you move on already? There's other people in the arcade too."

The boy turned around with furrowed eyebrows, his squinted eyes magnified by the large glasses resting on his nose. "You talkin' to me?"

You scoffed, folding your arms in front of you. "Who else would I be talking to? You're the only one hogging a machine."

Richie took a few quick glances around the arcade before turning his focus back onto you. "Looks like there's other games open still, sugar."

Your eyebrow twitched at the nickname but you held yourself back from snapping at him. "Well, I want to play this game."

Richie smirked at you before gesturing to the game screen in front of him. "See this, sugar?" He pointed to the high score on the screen, "This is my high score. Unless you can do better, I suggest you go play some other game." Ignoring his comment, you pushed next to him, entering your own quarter in the game. "H-Hey did you hear me?"

"Loud and clear," You responded, shooting him a fake smile. "Now are you going to play or what?" You gestured to the second set of controls.

Richie's frown turned into a smirk, the corner of his lip tipping upwards. "You're on, sugar."

All you could hear was the jamming of buttons and the occasional groan from your opponent. Your focus was on the game, determined to defeat the arrogant boy that stood next to you. You won the first round, making Richie grumble in disappointment. When he won the second round, he let out a victorious shout.

"You need to be faster than that to defeat me."

You rolled your eyes at his comment, stretching out your fingers to get ready for the next round. "There's one more round, you haven't won yet."

Richie bit his lip, concentrating on the combat game in front of him. He couldn't let this girl defeat him, not at his favorite game. Unfortunately, his health started to drain as you jammed the buttons, fingers working tirelessly to defeat the arrogant prick. Richie also got your health down pretty low, but it wasn't enough. With one final hit, you were able to knock down his character.

Mouth turned down in disappointment, he stared at the screen with hard eyes. Your mouth was turned up into a grin, feeling victorious as you got to enter your name into the screen.

"Best out of three?" Richie offered, looking at you with pleading eyes.

"Sure," You complied, "But you have to pay since you lost."

The two of you lost count of the score by the tenth game, the loser having to pay for the next round. The game kept going and before you knew it, it was already 5:30.

"Sorry I have to go," You spoke up before Richie could insert the next quarter, "My mom will kill me if I'm late to dinner."

Richie's grin faltered, looking over at the girl next to him. He had such a good time with you that he even lost track of time. For some reason, he wished he could pause time just so you could keep playing. He liked having someone as competition. Eddie was a good friend and he did play the game with him, but he wasn't much competition. Richie was bound to win every round. With you, however, there was a challenge to it. He would win a few rounds and you would win a few rounds. You were both testing each other's skills.

"Oh," Richie finally spoke, the hand holding the quarter slowly dropping, "Will you be here tomorrow?"

Your eyebrows drew in slightly at his question before giving him a few pats on the shoulder. "Yeah, I can play a few rounds tomorrow."

two

Masterlist

#richie tozier #richie tozier x reader #richie tozier imagine #richie tozier series #soulmate au #it 2017 #it 2017 x reader #it 2017 imagine #it 2017 series #x reader #series #fanfic #finn wolfhard #finn wolfhard imagine #fem!reader #it chapter one #it chapter one imagine #scar

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