#guys this is my least favorite in the trilogy & it still makes me cry
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Six eulogizing Jamie in Wreck of the Titan when he thinks he’s lost him again by saying “now he’s gone, gone on a journey to the undiscovered country. Without me.”
like. i do think he comes to terms with it a little fast (but I can’t really complain about that, because they get reunited again so soon afterward that he has to accept that he’s ‘dead’ quickly if we’re going to get to hear him mourning him at all - and there’s plenty of opportunities elsewhere in the trilogy to hear the Doctor stubbornly in denial/holding out hope about Jamie’s fate/s) but also - also. huh. im like, still struggling to find the right way to word this because like. That’s gotta be it, right? that’s gotta be the best & most succinct way of putting the Doctor’s feelings on not only losing his companions but death itself too, when you think about it.
Obviously the character doesn’t believe in any kind of religion we would recognize, but while they spend all their lives adventuring through the universe and constantly - no matter how old & experienced they become - stumbling across new and unknown people and places, there’s one place they haven’t gotten to see, but where all of the friends they’ve brought along on their adventures eventually wind up. And of course I think his horribly pained “without me” is a wish to be with Jamie specifically - it very clearly is one in context, since Six is explaining how this particular outing was meant to be a treat for Jamie, who doesn’t remember him at all, because he wanted to recapture “the good old days” when they traveled together on all their adventures - but it also reflects & emphasizes the fact that because Jamie’s gone, they’re both left to their travels, each one as alone as the other.
And the poem he quotes next (Walter Scott’s “Hie Away”) seals it for certain:
“Hie to haunts right seldom seen, lovely, lonesome, cool, and green, over bank and over brae, hie away, hie away” - The Doctor evidently envisions Jamie, virtually immediately, as being in a better place (and there’s even something vaguely encouraging, hopeful, aspirational about it, given the imperative nature of the verb hie) - clearly living on in some way, somewhere, some when - but also, crucially, lonely, and on an adventure where the Doctor can’t reach him and join him on.
The way he talks about it, death doesn’t seem to be about an ending to Jamie’s life at all, but rather the separation between the two of them - and in the Doctor’s eyes, that’s just as worthy of mourning all on its own, despite how very accustomed he must be to parting ways with companions in all different kinds of situations by the time he’s in this 6th regeneration.
(idk, even outside the obvious doctor/jamie of it all, I feel like that says a lot about the character’s perspective on both death and goodbyes in general)
#sixth doctor#jamie mccrimmon#wreck of the titan#big finish#guys this is my least favorite in the trilogy & it still makes me cry#look this has been in my drafts for a long time#i initially intended to relisten to the whole set (+ the companion chronicle) together -#to see if revisiting it in context gave me anything more to say about it#but it's just on my mind today & I don't have time to fully relisten so im just gonna ask the rest of you to think of it now as is#sorry#though i do love how literary they made even the dialogue in the land of fiction stories#so much to think about and pick apart
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My Unorganized Thoughts About Pokémon Scarlet and Violet DLC: Part 3
MOCHI MAYHEM
M̸̤͇̓͂̓͐̓̄̑̆̽͗ơ̸̡̧̧̛͉̻͈̮̹̥̤̠̤̿͌͆̏̅̐̒͋̽̄̉͜͜͝c̸̙̗̱͋́͋͌̾̀́͐̾͋̓̾͜h̶̢̩͈͕̮́̔̎į̸̢͓͎͕͕̱̆̉͗͜͜͝ ̸̼͔̑̈́̎̐̔͒͘m̸͈̜̠͕͙̱̣͕͐́̉͌͑̽́̑̐͊́̀̕o̶̧̢͉̪̦̊̈́̄́͐̉͐̐̚̕̚͠͠c̷̢͍̫͈̥͚̯̱̈́̿̀̏ḫ̷͊̿̊̄̌i̸̲̝̯̗̪̺̻̘̇̍̂̀͂̀͒͛̌̔̈́̕͜
T̸̘̽̈̐̈H̸̗̗̗̀̍Ë̶̥̰̯̥́ ̸͇̮̂̋̀̓S̵̊͘͜T̴͈̹̏̄̊̉Ȍ̴̬̬͖̄R̶̟̬͈̻̍̆͐̆Y̶̟̍̍͒͋
Probably my least favorite out of the trilogy.
Which is weird considering how much I love the possession trope and my boi Pecharunt.
But the way they just did it felt like a giant middle finger to me and everyone else who even remotely liked the Toxic Chain Kieran Theory.
First off, Kieran does not get possessed, in fact, he's the only one to NOT get possessed. Ironic.
Second, what the characters do when they're possessed... well... you've probably seen it by now
They do the fucking chicken dance while screaming "Mochi".
Which.... yeah. It's stupid, it's embarrassing, and I do not like it.
And yeah I can see why some people might enjoy it, but I just don't.
Oh but it gets worse (or better, depending how you feel about this)
So with the whole town under Pecharunt's control (and them doing the stupid dance) the player and Kieran go to stop this mayhem and get people back to normal. Boom, the end.
So, why don't I like it?
It's just... embarrassing. Gamefreak has hyped up Pecharunt and made them out to be a legitimate threat.
It could've been cool with Pecharunt slowly spreading its control to both people and Pokémon and wanted world domination.
We could've have an actual evil Pokémon in a main series game instead of an evil team! Pokémon are sentient, they're intelligent, they know the difference between right and wrong.
But, we didn't get that. In fact, this meme I made perfectly sums up how I feel
Point is, they hyped up Pecharunt out to be this puppet master, this shady manipulator, this evil Pokémon who desires control over people and Pokémon, but also gives them what they want. It stole Ogerpon's masks and killed her trainer for crying out loud!
Oh, which reminds me!
T̷͍͊̉̇͛H̷̩͂̒Ẻ̶̱͇͖ ̸̖̤̠̻͛Ṵ̵̱̊̑̑Ǹ̸͎̺̋̈̕T̶̟͒͌̀͝O̴̞͉͍̰̓͊L̸̦͗́̈́̕D̴̼͍͜͝ ̷̀ͅS̸̰̬͓̙͆̋͝T̸̛̯́̈͝Ỏ̴̲̠͠R̷̘̻̕Y̷̢̐ ̴̛̜̼͋́̓Ŏ̸̭̙͓̍̔̿F̶̢̫̦̄̔ ̸̨͙̘̇̀P̵̩̬̄͂̈̕Ē̴͓̟̘͓̓͘C̶͔̽͐̔H̶͖̜̓̎̉A̸̲̹͓̭͊̓̇̽R̸͖̔̓̈́U̷̘̖̫͐̂̅̏N̶͍̰̋̕T̸̢̿
If Mochi Mayhem was Gamefreak giving us the middle finger for liking the Toxic Chain Kieran Theory, then this is them curb stomping us to the ground.
If you had ANY more hope that Pecharunt was this manipulative evil gremlin, then it's better for you to just give up that hope so you don't end up crushed.
So, in this YouTube video we learn that Pecharunt was raised by an old couple and since Pecharunt wanted more love, it gave the old couple its mochi and it made them greedy. The couple then tasked Pecharunt to steal Ogerpon's masks and bring them back.
See guys? Pecharunt was told to get the masks by the old couple! The old couples greed were responsible for this!
They really couldn't have Pecharunt be evil by itself, they had to pin the blame on the old couple. And yeah, Pecharunt was greedy, it wanted more love. But STILL
And yes, I'm aware that the old couple is a reference to the Japanse story of Momotaro, but this shit SHOULDVE BEEN EXPLAINED IN-GAME
I should not have to go watch a YouTube video to figure out its basic motivation!
I even thought of an idea where if someone could take Pecharunt to the crystal pool they could see the old couple again. It would not only explain Pecharunt's motivations, and give Pecharunt some closure.
Ṱ̷̢͕̘̥̓̕H̶̤̽̈̂̈́̿͘E̶͉͎͇̮̼̭̟͒͒̆͑̅̄̀̚͠ ̷͇͉̭̝̘̹͖̼͇̙̹̲̺̦͌̐̌̏͂̌͛̄͌̾̃̕M̷̨̨̧͎̫̪̜̭̯̺̬̥͔̲͒̓̒̊͆̈́͌͗̐Ǔ̶̡̖̜̖̏̆̏́̎̋̈̓͑̕̚S̵̨̨͔̠̖͐͆̄͜Į̶̧̡̛̜̲̘̘̙̠̠͇̮̳̐͐͗́̀͗̐́̐̏̀̐͝C̸̪̖̜͖̱̜̰̻͚̟͍̮̋̇̏̀̀͋̐̂̒̾ͅͅ
I've said it before, and I'll say it again: The music is a banger. I like how Pecharunt's theme is similar to the Loyal 3, it's about the few connections the game ever makes.
S̷̡̛̤̞̟̥̮̆͒̀̉̔̋̂̀͂͘̕͘U̶̪̰̯̞̲̟͖̭͖͓̺͚͇͋͛̈́̂M̴̨̨̧̛̟̖̖͙̞͙̀̄̄́̅́͗̓̏͘̚͠M̸̦̯̦̱͎͙̲̞̌̆́̍͘A̶̡̛̜̙̘͙͍̪͐̿̎̑͐́͐̾̍ͅR̷̢̩̘͇̳̭̺͍͙̮̬͉̱̰͐͜Ỳ̷̧̨̮̱͓̺͎͛̌
Is it finally over? Can I see the sunlight again?
Jokes aside, I'm ready to get this done with.
So yeah, Mochi Mayhem.... it wasn't the best in my opinion. It just felt too silly, and didn't take the whole possession thing seriously. I didn't really feel anything about canon Pecharunt other than a mild inconvenience.
I know some like Mochi Mayhem and that's fine! It's okay for people to like how things went!
I just feel a bit disappointed. But I suppose that's the danger with fan theories, it gets your expectations too high.
Nothing was really explained. I'm not expecting them to spoonfeed the audience, but I wish there was more things that were explained!
The Untold Story of Pecharunt, The Loyal 3 and Pecharunt's connection, what brought the Loyal 3 back, these are things that should've been explained in the game.
Gamefreak, if you're going to have some red herrings in a story, there needs to be some foreshadowing to help cancel it out. When all of the evidence points to Kieran getting possessed/influenced and Pecharunt being a legitimate and intimidating threat, you can't expect us to NOT be disappointed.
I guess the only positive I can say (besides the music) is the interactions between the Area Zero gang and the Kitakami siblings was fun. I enjoyed that.
But yeah, those are my thoughts.
Plot: 3/10
Characters: 5/10
Music: 100/10
Pokemon Lore: -2/10
Overall: 3/10 (I'm being generous here)
#pokemon#pecharunt#pokemon kieran#mochi mayhem#pokemon dlc#ari rambles#dokutaro#kieran pokemon#rival kieran#mochi mayhem spoilers#mochi mayhem review
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May the 4th (Star Wars Day) Special Post
Happy May the 4th, everyone! Although I don’t post too much about Star Wars, believe me when I say that Star Wars is one of my favorite movie franchises out there, and The Clone Wars is one of my favorite TV shows of all time. So, in order to celebrate Star Wars Day, I decided to be positive and say at least three nice things about every live-action, theatrically released Star Wars movie, including Solo and Rogue One. So, let’s begin.
The Phantom Menace
Call me crazy, but I actually like the political stuff. Maybe that’s because I like political science and history, but I honestly don’t mind the Senate scenes at all. I think that, for a film trilogy that takes place when the Jedi were still around and working in tandem with the soon-to-fall Republic, political scenes were needed to worldbuild and set the setting.
Duel of the Fates. Need I say more? One of the best musical scores and duels in all of Star Wars--maybe even movies in general.
The podracing was very well done, in my opinion. If you ask me, it still looks convincing by today’s standards, and is suitably thrilling, and Jake Lloyd’s acting was pretty decent in the podracing sequence.
Attack of the Clones
The scene where Anakin’s mom dies and he slaughters the Tusken Raiders is very well done. And it’s excellent (and more violent and chilling) in the novelization. (In fact, I would fully recommend reading the prequel novelizations, they are excellent).
Across the Stars is a beautiful love score that communicates the love that Anakin and Padme have for each other, as well as their very tragic fate.
There’s a really good deleted scene where Anakin and Padme visit Padme’s family that I wish they had kept in the movie. It’s very cute, fleshes out the relationship between Anakin and Padme, and I really like how Padme’s family interacts with Anakin.
Revenge of the Sith
Palpatine is incredibly entertaining in this movie. You can tell Ian had a blast playing him.
The scene where Padme tells Anakin that she’s pregnant and his reaction to the news is perfectly written and acted. Hayden does such a good job with his line delivery and facial expressions--you can tell the emotions he’s going through as he’s reacting to the news that he’s going to be a father so, so well.
This movie does not hold back on the emotional trauma. When I first saw RotS, I cried incredibly hard, and I think the scene that really started the waterworks was the scene where the score “Padme’s Ruminations” play, where she and Anakin are looking out their respective windows during sunset, right before Anakin makes the choice that will change the course of galactic history forever: going to interfere with Palpatine’s arrest. There’s no dialogue in the scene, save a brief voice-over of Palpatine, and when Anakin starts to cry in that scene, so do I. The music is chilling, and, once again, Hayden’s acting is excellent. He doesn’t have to say anything for you to know what emotions he’s feeling.
Solo
Donald Glover KILLS it as Lando. Stole the show.
It’s a small background detail, but I really like the Imperial propaganda posters/videos/holograms you can see in public transit places. It definitely adds to the overall immersion and worldbuilding of this point in the galaxy’s history.
Okay I kind of liked the way that Han got his last name. Unpopular opinions, but I think it was funny. Love how some random guy created the last name of one of the most influential people/heroes in the galaxy.
Rogue One
The music? Super underrated. The score “Your Father Would Be Proud” makes me very emotional and suits the scene very well.
K-2SO is the best droid in the franchise. Yes, he is better than C-3PO and R2. You cannot convince me otherwise.
Like, Revenge of the Sith, this movie does NOT hold back. It straight up kills all of the main characters, and shows that just because you do something heroic doesn’t mean that you’re going to get a happy ending. And it shows that you don’t have to be a space wizard, politician, or part of some important lineage in order to make a difference within the universe.
Bonus one because this is one of my favorites: The hallway scene with Darth Vader. Enough said.
A New Hope
I mean…this is literally the movie that started it all? Without this movie, we would have no Star Wars.
Han, Luke, and Leia play off each other better than any other main characters in the franchise. I love their back and forth as they’re escaping the Death Star.
I really love the meeting scene with all of the commanders, moffs, important people, etc. are talking about the rebels, the Force, etc. I think that scene perfectly establishes the character and organization of the Empire, and it’s interesting, since it shows that Vader respects Tarkin, even though he could easily kill him. (I really love how The Clone Wars built on this.)
The Empire Strikes Back
This is one of my favorite movies of all time. It’s hard to pinpoint specific things that I like, because, like, everything is borderline perfect.
It has one of the greatest plot twists in all of cinema history. Like, sure, Vader being Luke’s father is common knowledge now, but when it first came out? Nope. I would have loved to be in the cinema, watching that scene for the first time, and getting my mind blown.
The duel between Luke and Vader is so underrated, in my opinion. Like, sure, it’s not as flashy as some of the duels in the prequels, but the stakes are high, and I love how Luke and Vader utilize their surroundings to fight. (Doesn’t beat Darth Maul using a hallway to fight in TCW, though). It’s probably my third favorite duel in the franchise.
Bonus because I love this move: it shows that Leia is Force Sensitive. Her using the Force in the sequels did not come out of nowhere.
Return of the Jedi
The celebration music is SO GOOD. One of my favorite Star Wars tracks of all time. It’s one of the few times a Star Wars movie has a definitive happy ending, and it’s so satisfying seeing the characters celebrate and have fun together, having won a war that was going on for over two decades.
Again, call me crazy, but I love seeing Hayden’s Anakin as a force ghost. That tied the prequels and original trilogy together wonderfully.
The scenes in the throne room of the second Death Star is some of the best scenes in Star Wars. There’s real drama, danger, and other powerful emotions. The Emperor really shows how evil he is here.
The Force Awakens
Finn is such an interesting character, and is perfectly used in this movie. Humanizing a stormtrooper, who, previous to this movie, had been nothing but blaster fodder that the heroes easily and effortlessly gun down was a cool concept.
Hux is at his best here. That speech? Perfectly acted by Domhall Gleeson.
Honestly, I’m glad that they made the main character female. Like, say what you want about the sequels or Rey’s abilities, but, even if her character wasn’t written perfectly (well--it was written perfectly, which is a bit of an issue lol), it was good to have a female Jedi in a live-action movie. Some people say “well, the prequels had female Jedi.” Yes, but those Jedi were on screen for such a short amount of time that you could literally blink and miss them. “Clone Wars had female Jedi.” Yes, they did, and Ahsoka is one of my favorite Star Wars characters of all time. However, a lot of people who go and watch Star Wars in the movies don’t go out and watch side TV shows or read the comics/books. And if you ask me, you shouldn’t have to search side material if you’re just a casual Star Wars fan to find female representation. I am genuinely glad for all of the women who are Star Wars fans who only choose to see the movies (and that doesn’t make them any less fans than people who watch the shows and read the books/comics) who felt empowered seeing a main character who was a female Jedi.
The Last Jedi
Kylo Ren is written excellently here. His inner conflict is SO. WELL. ACTED. By Adam Driver. That man carried the sequels.
Rey, too, is at her best. In this movie, she fails. She struggles to get through to Luke, and she fails to turn Kylo to the light, and she loses the fight against Snoke. But she grows, and in this movie, she’s very compelling.
I love Luke and Kylo’s fight. Not only is it well choreographed, but the dialogue between the two of them is top-notch, too.
Rise of Skywalker
Honestly? I really like the back and forth dialogue between Poe, Finn, and Rey. Those actors have really good chemistry.
I do appreciate Palpatine quoting Revenge of the Sith, since Disney likes to pretend the prequels don’t exist.
The movie is very fast-paced and makes for a very energetic viewing experience
Well. That’s it. Happy May the 4th once more!
#star wars#may the 4th be with you#star wars movies#star wars prequels#star wars original trilogy#star wars sequels#star wars prequel trilogy#star wars sequel trilogy#the phantom menace#attack of the clones#revenge of the sith#solo#rogue one#a new hope#the empire strikes back#return of the jedi#the force awakens#the last jedi#the rise of skywalker
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Third person POV
“Heyyy, I’m starving! What’s for dinner?” Toga whined, kicking her legs in frustration
“Dunno. Our cook isn’t here if you haven’t noticed moron” Dabi spoke with a scoff. “Hey! No need to be so rude, Dabi! You should know better than to insult a psychopath, especially when they are hungry!” Dabi doesn’t seem intimidated by this. He just replies with “Whatever.”
Rapid footsteps are heard as a tween enters the room with excitement, holding a Switch. “Shig Shig! The last new tracks dropped on Mario kart and there’s new characters! Let’s play! You promised I could if I did extra chores so I leaked pictures of Midnight’s awkward years online! She’s pissed, it’s hilarious! So, can we play?” The girl, Koboshi asked
“Hey hey, let’s do that! We can all play and whoever wins gets to pick a movie we all have to watch!” Toga perks up
“Any movie? Does that mean I can finally get you all to watch Twilight? *As a joke! Because I don’t like it or anything!* Twice is on board. “Oh yay! That sounds fun! Now I can finally beat someone other than Shigaraki!” Koboshi grinned
Somehow, they got everyone to agree to play. Two people go at a time and race four tracks. The winner moves onto the next round and it continues until a winner is decided in the finals. The first matchups are Iggy(Spinner) vs Bowser(Dabi), Blue Shy guy(Compress) vs Gold Mario(Shigaraki), Pink gold Peach(Toga) vs Waluigi(Twice) and Kamek(Koboshi) vs Wendy(Magne). They all race, with the four moving on being Spinner, Shigaraki, Twice and Koboshi. With that, the semi final round starts, with Iggy vs Kamek and Waluigi vs Gold Mario
“Come on, Shig! Put some more effort into it, this is embarrassing! Losing to Twice. I wanna race you in the finals and I really don’t want to have to watch Twilight tonight!” Koboshi cringes at the thought
“I am putting effort into it! Twice is just getting lucky, that’s all! I should’ve picked better wheels damn it!” Shigaraki scratches at his neck, something he does fairly often, especially when he’s irritated or stressed
“Well suck it up! This is the final track and it’s.. Mushroom Gorge! Lucky. I love that one. And I got all the boring tracks” Koboshi said with a grumble
“Let’s go Waluigi! *We should’ve picked Wario!*” Twice debates with himself. The race starts as they struggle to stay on the road as they decided to race on 200cc. Things are looking promising for Shigaraki who passes Twice and knocks him into 8th place
“Here it is! Final lap!” Everyone is hyped up now, watching Twice and Shigaraki race neck in neck
“Come on come on! Ah fuck! I knew I shouldn’t have taken the left path” Shigaraki curses out loud
“So long, loser! It’s my time now! *Don’t gloat before crossing the line moron!*” Twice had a point as he rounds the final corner, gets hit by a red shell and then hits into a Goomba. “What?! What?!” Wario passes Twice, the character laughing as he does so and it’s too late. He passes the final line, making first
“Why?! Fuck you Wario! *Waluigi is better anyway!*” Twice finishes 2nd and Shigaraki 4th.
“And the racer moving onto the finals is… Waluigi! Congrats!” Magne cheered. Twice gasps in shock and then begins acting like he won a beauty pageant, crying and thanking random people
“Too bad, Shig! But you know, you are handling it better than…” Koboshi can’t even finish as she witnesses him turn the red joycon to dust. “Not again..” Spinner gets up from his spot and goes over to the entertainment center, pulling a new joycon out of a box labeled “In case of rage.”
“Well then, it’s you and me Twice! Now let’s get started so I can pull out the movie we will all be watching. Which will of course be my favorite movie out of the Star Wars trilogy, Attack of the clones!” Everyone groans upon hearing that. “What? You rather watch fucking Twilight? At least Jar Jar binks shows more emotions than Bella!”
“Whatever! Just start racing and decide the winner already so I know how long of a nap I can take” Dabi still shows no interest or anything
“Ok ok! Imma pick Kamek again and… uh oh,” Koboshi breathes in through her teeth as she sees the error sign now covering the TV screen
“What happened?” Toga asked
“The Switch crashed. It’s been doing that lately. Probably because somebody keeps throwing it in rage,” Koboshi turns to Shigaraki. “Well it’s either that or dusting. Which would you prefer?” Is what he answers, shrugging his shoulders
“Well what do we do now? Perhaps we could watch both Twilight and—“ “NO!” Mr. Compress’ idea is quickly shut down
“Maybe we can race on another console? *Or better idea..*”
Kurogiri warps into the bar, setting down containers of take out food. “Master Shigaraki? Dinner is here” He calls out but is met with silence. “Master Shigaraki? Young Koboshi? Hello?” He can practically hear his voice echoing through the building
Then he hears it, a loud screeching and zooming noise. It’s coming from outside. He goes to the tinted window and is met with the sight of some of the members lined up on the sidewalk and watching two familiar people race in clearly stolen vehicles. He hears muffled talking. “Best idea ever! I thought you were gonna suggest GTA but I love this a lot more! Who needs a drivers license when you have experience in simulator racing?” The two cars go speeding off again, hitting trash and such along the way
“I need a stiff drink.”
#my hero academia#boko no hero academia#league of villains#LOV#villains#original character#fan character#Mario kart#one shot#still suck at tags and writing
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Dancing In and Above the Starlight
summary: There is nothing to do but dance the night away.
a/n: Since I am depresso expresso today here is some fluff!
warnings: Depression, heights, suicidal ideation
You curl your body into the sheets, limbs escaping the gnawing cold. Your eyes are wide open. You watch as glittering snow falls away. There’s a press of static in your mind. Maybe your brain is finally short-circuiting. You really should have been asleep an hour or two or five ago. Even if you check the clock now, it won’t make any sense. On some level, you are lucid. You recognize the characters on your taped together alarm clock. The red characters on its screen… you recognize them as numbers and letters. Your head feels like it’s full of cotton.
You shift again. You hit replay on the voice mail.
Kon’s voice comes over the speaker, a light warm sound cutting through the viscous atmosphere of the apartment. “Hey, babe! Could you grab like 20 cheeseburgers on your way home? It’s- Uuuuuuh… It’s for science. Yeah, totally-”
You replay it again.
“Hey, babe!”
And again.
“Hey, babe!”
And again.
Kon’s voice always managed to soothe you, smoothing out your fraying nerves even on the bad days. But today was one of the bad days you never tell him about. The kind that kept your limbs locked together.
You really should just call Kon at this point.
You don’t.
You don’t want him to see you like this. You don’t want to talk to him about these bad days. The days when you have to shuck off the quick wit and unbridled confidence. You don’t want to tell him about how you want to open your chest, peel it back bone by bone until the thing rolling and shifting in your chest escapes. You can’t bear to tell him about how on these days red is your favorite color or how good it would be to step out of your skin. You will never tell him about your feverish need to feel the wind as you fall from a great height.
Waking up like this feels like waking up in a coffin with your hands bound. There is a shriek caught in your throat between your lungs and throat. It sits there sharp and unreachable. You feel so small.
You shift, looking into the soft glow of your screen. You type Kon’s number. It’s easy. You don’t think too much about it. At least not until the dial tone.
You sniffle brushing away the tears as if he could see.
The dial tone keeps ringing.
He hates you.
You massage your throat. You test out your voice. It comes out a mockery of itself. It’s scraggly and unpleasant.
The dial tone keeps ringing.
He hates you.
You brush away the tears again. They won’t stop. They streak down like fat rivulets of syrup down your face.
The dial tone keeps ringing.
He hates you.
You hang up. You’re shaking and sniffling and you can’t stop crying. Your body is caught between existing and not. There isn’t enough of your mind there for you to feel substantial.
Once your nerves settle and your body reforms into something tangible, you pull on a sweater. Your feet touch the floor. It’s cold like you expect but the solidness of the feeling makes you jump back. You look at the clock. It still makes no sense.
You slink out to the balcony. You wrap your arms around yourself, phone burning in your pocket.
You lean you over the railing, head in your arms, eyes fluttering closed as you drink up the scenery. You can hear the honking of car horns and the flutter of wings. The city below you was alive. A living creature with flowing blood and a beating heart.
Living was what happened to other people. For you, there was no room for it. Not when you are filled with everything else. It was just a skill you never quite got a hold of. You think this as the wind whistles past your face.
You open your eyes a fraction then shut them again mimicking the shuttering of a camera. Behind your eyelids, you can see the glittering lights of the city.
Your phone rings. You flinch. Maybe it’s your boss. Or a coworker. Or…
You fish it out of your pajama pants. You debate on whether to answer it or just let the phone fall.
From this height, your phone would be obliterated. Completely. You balance it carefully between your fingers. If it falls, you’ll have an excuse to ignore your boss. But you’ll have to pay for a new one and more importantly, you won’t be able to listen to Kon’s voice mails. You make an exasperated noise and decide to answer.
“Hey sugar,” comes the smooth cream of Kon’s voice. It kind of reminds you of freshly made custard. You smother the catch of your breath by pressing your mouth into your sleeve. “Babe, you ok?”
Of course, he heard.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” you breathe, voice sounding frighteningly robotic.
“Liar.”
“Prove it.”
You can hear the playful hum in Kon’s voice. “I can make you sing all kinds of tunes, hun,” Kon teases. You can just picture him winking. “I’ll make you talk, doll.”
“Hilarious, Kent, ” You bite out, fighting down a blush.
“Seriously, Sugar, what’s up?”
You hate the concern in his voice. No, no. You don’t. You love your boyfriend. You just- You just hate that you made him worry. “I- I’m just a bit down, Kon. I promise I’ll be better tomorrow.” You run your hand through your hair and you bury your face further into your arms. “I promise.”
“Babe, tilt your face up.” You sigh, shaking your head but thankful for the change in subject. You tilt your head, keeping your eyes closed. “Kon, wha-” You feel the press of warm lips against yours. They’re chapped ever so slightly and you can smell the scent of leather and popcorn on the wind. Kon smiles against your lips, mischief tugging at his them. Slowly, you open your eyes and you’re greeted by the column of his throat. It takes the span of a few seconds to realize that Kon is hanging upside down, limbs angled like he’s Spiderman hanging from his we b. Your eyes widen in surprise and Kon laughs, realigning himself to face you properly.
“Lemme guess, you guys watched the original Spiderman trilogy?”
“You know us so well.”
“I just know that there's only one of you that owns a flat screen the size of my wall and that bastard is a nerd.”
“Don’t call Tim a nerd. That’s extremely rude.”
“He deserves all the rudeness I have to give after last week’s… what’s the word?”
“Fun?”
“Fun?” you snort. “If you find being thrown by a supervillain fun, then yeah.”
“I just call that kinky.”
“I’m going to hang up.”
Click.
Ring.
Click.
“YOU ACTUALLY HUNG UP.”
“I stick to my word.”
“Lil’ shit.”
“I’m your little shit.”
Kon kisses your nose. “Ain’t that the truth.”
“Did you need anything, Kon?” He hums floating away from you drawing out the silence. You are going to smack him. Probably not but you like to think you can stay mad at him long enough to follow through with the threat.
“I want to show you something,” he says, extending a gloved hand towards you. “It’ll be good. Promise.”
You stand on the balcony railing, feet feather-light. You hold on, gripping the wall tightly. Your eyes do not wander down even as a rush of wind blows the hair out on your face. Your blood is thumping in your ears.
“Trust me?” The words weigh too heavy sending you into a dizzying vertigo. He can’t ask that of you. He just can’t. You almost slip. You don’t know whether you would fall forward or backward. You take a breath, long and deep.
“Kon, do I seem like the kind of person who would just stand on a balcony railing just for anyone?”
“Dunno, babe, you’re quite the Romantic.”
You blow out a breath, shaking hands steadfast on the wall. The drop is dizzyingly long from this angle. The length of it feels mind-boggling and uncertain.
“C’mon, gorgeous,” he coaxes, voice honeyed iced tea. The taste floods your mouth mixing with the bitter doubt clambering your throat.
He reaches his hand out, grey eyes alight with sincerity. You swallow even when your mouth is bone dry. You take his hand, feet peeling away from the metal as you let Kon’s powers take hold of you. Your skin tingles, gooseflesh prickling here and there. It tickles and it’s almost enough to distract you from the hundreds of feet of empty air beneath your feet.
You’re light, insubstantial. Your breath ceases. Your body braces for gravity to take hold. Your eyes screw shut, lips brushing against Kon’s neck as you breathe in his familiar scent. A scream is burning in your throat until you feel Kon’s hands firmly on your waist, his chin resting on your hair.
“Don’t let me fall,” you breathe, wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders.
Kon gently cups your face. “Wouldn’t dream of it, gorgeous,” he winks, “I have better ways to make you scream.”
You laugh, pressing your lips against his, your laughter passing as vibrations between your lips.
“Are you gonna open your eyes yet, gorgeous?”
“Nope!”
“Not even for lil’ ole me?”
“Why would you pull that on me you manipulative shit?”
“Because I love you?”
“You are the definition of ‘you’re lucky you’re cute’ ”
“No, I think I’m lucky cus you’re cute.” You open your mouth to protest but the syllable die on your tongue.
Above you is a tapestry of stars extending beyond eternity. Below your bare feet is a sea of lights, incandescent in its vividness. The wind in your chest rises. Wonder and awe and miracles swimming in your veins as you go through vertigo for the second time that day. It was like the first time you saw the racing roll of a jet. A marvel. Pure wonder plucked from the abstract and made solid.
Your breath catches as you take everything in. The world is so wonderful. Your grip on Kon loosens as you maneuver your body so you could see it all. Your mouth whispers something that is lost in the wind.
“What do you think, sugar?” Kon asks, grip on you firm. He won’t let you fall. You are slack jawed and speechless. Eyes wide as you stare back into his, all the lights above and below you making his glitter in a barrage of colors. He pulls you close, one arm wrapped around. A gloved hand brushes a tear away from your face. He kisses your forehead, all softness and warmth. He doesn’t beg you to stop crying or tell you that it’s all going to be ok. He just lets you be. Your head bows, forehead pressed against his shirt. You let the tears fall towards the bustling city.
Kon rests his chin on your head and you feel the rumble in his chest before you even hear the tune. “Fly me to the moon~” he sings into your hair as he holds you close, his hands sliding to your waist,“let me play among the stars~” You sniffle, resting your head on his. You smile against his shoulder. You feel a giggle tugging on your lips as you two sway in rhythm with his singing.
“”Let me see what spring is like on, A-Jupiter and Mars~”
“You are so fucking cheesy,” you laugh, sore and bright and genuine.
"Still your favorite cheese ball though," he chuckles. You do not argue. You simply press a kiss to his jaw and watch the twinkling lights around you.
"Fly me to the me to the moooon~" This time you sing along, careful not to step on Kon's toes. He presses his forehead against yours as you both sing off key and sway haphazardly in the wind.
You sing and dance in and above the starlight.
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Thanks fir reading!!! Happy New Years. I will edit more later.
Tag list: @batarella, @anothertimdrakestan, @lucy-roo, @multifandomgirl-us, @idkmanicantenglish,@birdy-bat-writes, @boosyboo9206, @americasmarauders , @l-horizon11, @arestorationofbalance , @cloudie-skay, @wunderstell @hyp-oh-critical
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Loki ranting
Okay. I had this thought in my head of like just compiling links of all the Loki shit I've posted/reblogged so far so that when I get into a conversation about the show and how it fucking disgusted me, I can just be like "here. here's this masterlist post, go read all this shit. This is my entire argument, and not only mine, but a lot of stuff posted by people far more intelligent and level-headed and eloquent than I am, whom I happen to agree with." Because the alternative is constantly getting fired up all over again, and that is exhausting.
BUT! I'm stupid and don't know how tumblr works. Apparently I can't just be like "give me all the Loki-tagged shit I've got" I can only search all the Loki-tagged shit on all of tumblr. And I'm not scrolling back through all of my posts. I talk too fucking much for that shit 😂
So, I'll try to remember all of my grievances with how the MCU has treated Loki, and all of the excellent posts made by other, equally upset fans, and put it all together here under this nice, neat little cut for everyone else's sanity and scrolling convenience...
For people who actually read my shit fairly regularly - bless you, you crazy, patient people. I love you! - this is going to be a lot of repetition of shit you've already read. Probably at least twice. I'm passionate and I have a terrible memory lol. Sorry.
Anyway, first, for those who don't know me and haven't been following my explosions of rage for the past couple of months, some quick background: I do not read comic books, so Loki's Marvel comic canon means nothing to me. I know almost nothing about it. The reason I'm so in love with the character in the MCU is because I am an eclectic witch and the deity I've actively loved and worshiped the longest in my life (literally for as long as I can remember) is Loki. So when he was mentioned in The Mask, I squeed. When they named Matt Damon's character after him in Dogma, I cheered.
When Thor came out in 2011, I just about died from happiness. I was hungry for any representation of this underappreciated god, no matter what it was. I didn't even bitch about how underpowered he was, because at least he was there. But I'm getting slightly ahead of myself.
I can hear anyone reading this going "Why Loki? Isn't he, like, evil? Like basically the Norse version of The Devil?" Because I heard all this shit irl all the fucking time. And no. So let me give you a quick rundown of who Loki actually is.
Loki is a Trickster God. He's often referred to as the God of Mischief. He is not and never was evil, simply chaotic and hedonistic. Loki Laufeyjarson was the son of Laufey (that's mama; they changed her to a man for some reason in the movie) and Fárbauti. Right from the start, from his name, we get a sign of how Loki goes against traditional norms of the time, because in Norse culture, families were patrilineal, and surnames were "son/daughter of father" (which would have made him Loki Fárbautitason), not the mother. But Loki's surname is matrilineal. Feminist icon woo! lol
Though he's a Jotunn, Loki is counted among the Gods (Aesir) in Norse tradition. Depending on his mood, he is alternately helpful or disruptive to the other Gods. I'm not gonna sit and teach a whole text class on him lol but I'll use my favorite example of Misunderstood Loki - the conception of Sleipnir!
So, get this shit. This is also part of why I DO NOT follow Odin and never fucking will (a very small part, but still part of the reason). So, the other Norse Gods are petty motherfuckers, and they wanted some shit built but didn't want to pay the dude doing the building. So they were like "okay, if you can get it done in X amount of time, we'll pay you, but if you can't manage it NO MATTER WHAT, this whole thing is free." And they made sure he had NO help, nothing but him, his materials, and his Very Good Horsey. And this guy and his horse were fucking BAMFs. So it was looking like he was definitely gonna get it done in time, and Odin was like "nah, fuck that shit. I'm cheap." and so he sent Loki to distract the work horse. Loki transformed into a mare and lured the horse away, got fucked, got pregnant, gave birth to the 8-legged (for some reason) horse Sleipnir. Odin rides Loki's son into battle. Um. Kay.
So Loki helped Odin be a petty mf, and Odin got himself a new pet out of the deal.
Oh, also, because he's smart af and a shapeshifter and a master magician and genderfluid, Loki "fails" to fit the super fucking toxic and narrow Norse/Aesir view of "a real man". He prefers intelligence and manipulation to solve problems rather than violence, he's not afraid to behave like a clown if it gets shit done, and that grosses the Aesir out, so they constantly ridicule him for being "less than a man".
Loki is the God of the outcast and the misunderstood. The marginalized people from all walks of life. He is the God of the LGBT community. In modern terms, he's pansexual, polyamorous (married to Sigyn and they are deeply in love, but boy gets around and I've never seen any indication that Sigyn gives a shit) and genderfluid.
Okay. Focus, Ali. This is part of why I usually post multiple rants instead of one big long one XD The longer I ramble, the more I get sidetracked and forget the original point.
So. Loki's awesome, and being a Trickster, is powerful as all fucking hell. There's not much he can't do.
And now we come to Thor (the movie, not the deity). Loki's there! 24-year-old Ali is spazzing! All is right with the world!
Oh lord, they've actually done him justice?! Amazing! He's complex and nuanced and emotional, just like the real Loki! I loved this movie. Loved. It. The climactic thing with trying to blow up Jotunheim never really made much sense to me until someone made an excellent point the other day about Loki being raised in a racist society that was racist against his own race, he just didn't know it yet, poor child. Baby Thor was never corrected when he pledged to commit mass genocide, so Baby Loki probably absorbed the lesson then that Jotunns=evil and killing them all will win his father's love. Anyway, 2011 Loki was a beautiful, heartbreaking portrayal of the God I've loved all my life and spent 24 years longing to see depicted on the big screen.
Then The Avengers happened. And I saw another Loki very close to Norse mythology - mainly, how he's treated. In the beginning of the movie, he's sick, exhausted, and in pain. He can hardly stand, he stumbles and needs help when he walks. He was very obviously tortured, and the sickly blue light of the scepter's control is in his eyes. That gets less and less pronounced as the movie goes on, showing Loki working his way free of it, but in the beginning, he's a mess. Because he was tortured and used by Thanos. Marvel directly confirmed this, and that he was under the scepter's/Mind Stone's control. Loki's actions are not his own in The Avengers. He's under both threat and Thanos' direct control. The movie actually shows The Other directly threatening him to keep him on task, because this is not Loki's plan. It is not what he wants. He's being used and villainized... Just like in real life. It hurt to see this done to him, but the accuracy was too beautiful to ignore.
Thor: The Dark World comes out. I've heard people complain that this movie is the weak link in the Thor trilogy. I disagree. I think that's Ragnarok, for a bunch of reasons, but we'll get there. (And for the record, I loved Ragnarok, too. It was a funny movie. Infinity War and the Disney+ series are the only portrayals of Loki in the MCU that I truly fucking hated.) Anyway, good, fun movie. Had its faults, as all movies do, but it still followed Loki's real-life arc in a way. How? By having Loki dragged back to Asgard in chains and imprisoned underground. Again, not super happy that this happened to my love, and having to see it on screen was painful, but at least in the MCU he's not chained to a rock with venom dripping on his face for eternity, so there's that. (poor Sigyn. how tired do her arms get, holding up that bowl? best wife ever, amirite?)
In TDW, we're shown Loki's love for Frigga, who favored him and taught him magic as a child. We see his bravado; his attempts to mask his true feelings, especially grief. We see him slowly coming back to himself after the events of The Avengers, and slowly mending his relationship with his brother. He accepts that Odin will likely never love him, but Thor just might, because they were close when they were young. "I didn't do it for him." No, no my sweet, you did it for your brother, and a little out of guilt for what happened to your mother.
At the end, Loki fakes his death and escapes, taking the throne, and I have mixed feelings about this. Not the writer's choices here; I love that completely! A natural progression in Loki's story. But my joy is tainted by how closely they're following the Eddas now. Because Loki's escape from his prison heralds the beginning of Ragnarok. And Loki will die in Ragnarok. I don't want to see that play out in front of my face. I won't be able to handle the grief (spoiler alert! IW broke me. I almost walked out of the theater. Loki's death was legitimately fucking traumatic for me. I don't even care how pathetic that is. That grief was real, it was intense, and I still shake and cry when I think about it.)
Marvel announces that Thor 3 will be called Ragnarok. The internet treats this as a shocking revelation. I roll my eyes and mumble "duh" to myself and move on XD
Then they say Ragnarok will be a buddy comedy. I throw up a little in my mouth and no longer want to live on this planet. If they're going to make something called Ragnarok, could they at least treat it with even a fraction of the respect they've shown these characters thusfar? Jfc. I mean, I'll see it anyway, because I'm a whore for Tom Hiddleston lol. But come on, people!
I hated that they made Hel the long-lost older sister and Fenrir her fucking pet/attack dog. Those are my favorites of Loki's children! Hel is such an incredible badass that the early Christians named their dimension of eternal torture after her! They were terrified of her, to the point of naming the place that terrified them most after her. That's awesome! And Fenrir's just the best. I love wolves. Those two details, and Odin's retcon of "we're not Gods! ...lol, except your sister. she's totally a Goddess. and def gonna kill literally everything, so... good luck! byyyeeeee" pissed me off royally.
The rest was great. I genuinely liked this movie. Still do. And they finally used The Immigrant Song! That was pretty cool. If they'd thrown in Bring the Hammer Down and Thunderstruck, I might've called this movie perfect. XD
I wasn't totally in love with their portrayal of Loki in Ragnarok. Yes, the falling for 30 minutes line was funny, as was "I have to get off this planet" and "YES! That's how it feels!" And "Get Help" was funny as hell. But also, like... There is no way Loki would have been the dumb one in that first encounter with Hela. Also, he can teleport and project copies of himself and shit, so... He would not have been that desperate to go straight back to Asgard and bring her right along with them. Loki's not stupid. But whatever. Movie's gotta movie.
What I did love was seeing the slow mending of his relationship with Thor continuing, and the badass fighting on the bridge. I also loved that, like Real Loki, Movie Loki helped when help was needed, was quick and clever, and while he was carrying out the main plan, he was also planning ahead and grabbing the Tesseract. Yes, that drew Thanos right to them, but that's a whole other thing. Loki never would have left that thing on Asgard to be destroyed or lost.
And now Infinity War. Hooooly fucking shit. You know what? No. I'm not going into this. He was killed, years of character growth were erased forever, my heart fucking shattered. The end.
Endgame. IW hurt me so bad I didn't see Endgame until this year. I actually watched Civil War first (for context: I had actively avoided all Cap movies until this year because I fucking hate Steve Rogers. I find him insufferable. Did not realize what I was denying myself until I watched CW and finally saw the charms of Bucky. When he appeared in IW, I was so lost. XD I was like "...who dis? Murder Jesus?" also I just... didn't care. I was numb by then from crying through most of the movie over Loki)
So, anyway. Endgame. Loki picks up the Tesseract in alternate 2012, escapes, fans go "yay! he didn't actually die!" I go "yes he fucking did. Five years of his life, gone. Five years of growth and change, erased. Loki is dead. This will not be the same."
I was more right than I could have predicted. Now we come to the point of this rant. Sorry it took so long, but you were warned lol.
The Loki series makes me so angry I actually get sick to my stomach. It was fucking TRASH. When I praised Marvel for following Norse mythology so faithfully earlier? Yeah. I DID NOT MEAN TREAT HIM THE WAY THE OTHER GODS DID. I did not mean paint him as a pitiful clown, a joke, a caricature of who he truly was, with his pain and suffering played for LAUGHS.
This is supposed to be 2012 Loki, newly freed from Thanos' control. The Loki we saw in the beginning of TDW - snarky, exhausted, nihilistic. The Loki who rolled his eyes and said "get on with it" expecting to be killed.
The bumbling clown flipping on a dime from posturing to calling himself weak is not 2012 Loki. That is not ANY Loki. That is Tom Hiddleston in a black wig doing what he's told by a shitty writer who had no fucking idea what he was doing and was salty about his (bad) original script (for something totally fucking unrelated) getting killed.
In Episode 1, Loki is mocked, imprisoned, stripped against his will, tormented, belittled, and given a flippant summary of all the trauma Actual MCU Loki suffered that this one skipped out on, with no context, no acknowledgement of the trauma he's already lived quite fucking recently, and with the narrative twisted to not only erase all the abuse he's suffered, but to make it all his fault. And this is supposed to make him want to help these people?
And worse, IT FUCKING WORKS. WHAT?! I CAN'T- FUCKING WHAT?! Remember when I said LOKI IS NOT FUCKING STUPID?! So why is he STUPID?
Episode 2, he's a child. Mentally, this Loki is a fucking child. Now we've erased all the growth and development of his entire adult life. He's dopey, impatient, impulsive, desperate for a pat on the back and actually shows it. Yes, abused and neglected children crave the positive attention we never received, and we often grow up to be a bit emotionally stunted. But not all of us, and not Loki. Not as we've seen him EVER in the rest of the MCU. Playful and a bit callous at times? Absolutely! But not a big dumb fucking puppy.
Episode 3, a ray of hope, despite Sylvie! (I hate Sylvie) Loki casually admits he's pan/bi; labels never come up, but he admits to being with both men and women! He sings! Not really relevant to whether I approve of his portrayal or not lol but Tom has a beautiful voice, Norwegian ("Asgardian" lol) is a gorgeous, entrancing language, and I could watch that one bit on loop for eternity and never get bored. And then, finally, we see a glimpse - a glimpse - of Loki's power! He stops a falling building and pushes it right back up! Are we finally getting to see what he can really do? Will the next episode bring us Loki in all his glory?
Nope. 4 and 5 we see him mocked and pushed around and utterly irrelevant. Again. We see tiny reflections of what he could maybe theoretically do in other random Loki variants, but the "main" (lawl. main. it was the Sylvie and Mobius show. Loki was never the main anything.) Loki? Nothing. He wears his heart on his sleeve for no reason, bonds with the man who imprisoned, taunted, and gaslit him, is killed, and continues to be a moron and a joke. Always the clown. Always the dumb one. The one with the bad ideas. The inferior Loki.
Don't even get me started on that finale. I can't. This already took so much out of me. Fuck Marvel. Fuck this fucking show. I just... I'm done.
#loki#loki spoilers#loki series#loki negativity#loki hate#thor 2011#the dark world#ragnarok#the avengers#infinity war#endgame#fuck sylvie#fuck marvel#fuck disney#this show sucked#ragepost#rant#long post#ali is angry
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Hey, I was wondering if you have a book rec
!!
Okay so in full disclosure, I have a really hard time reading books. My brain sometime around six years ago just decided that wasn't its style anymore, so I don't read a TON. A lot of these aren’t going to be recent releases. However, here are a bunch of books I would absolutely recommend checking out! I tried to include a variety of genres but I have uh.....five bookshelves in my apartment so if you're looking for more of a certain genre let me know!
Theatre:
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead - Tom Stoppard
Waiting for Godot - Samuel Beckett
These are my two favorite plays - they're both absurdist, humorous, and have some fun things to say. They’re both by old white guys but like....I love both Tom Stoppard and Samuel Beckett DEEPLY and they have all of my love and respect.
Non-Fiction/Educational:
Why are all the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria by Beverly Daniel Tatum - this is considered a 'classic' on the psychology of racism, and was particularly helpful for me as a white person in arming myself against 'reverse racism' thoughts and in dissembling my own prejudices. This is mostly a rec for other white folks, but Tatum also addresses 'having the courage to sit at the black table' as a way of claiming your own identity outside of the stereotypes the dominant society expects of you.
Daring Greatly by Brene Brown - Okay listen I just really REALLY love Brene Brown, she is a therapist most famous for her TED talk about Vulnerability and this is just...listen I really like to read this book when I am sad and feel like shit because it makes me feel strong. I reread this book at least once a year.
Imagined Communities by Benendict Anderson - This is an absolutely fascinating read on the rise of nationalism. It’s a bit dry and wordy, but the ideas and use of history as propaganda, spinning the story of a nation to pit it against or on the same side as other nations, and the ways in which these tactics shaped cultural history is just!!!! Amazing.
Gay New York by George Chauncey - This is just one of the most informative and interesting reads of queer history in New York that I’ve ever come across. It’s one of the ‘must reads’ of queer history and has so many interesting tidbits that I have to recommend it. It’s a bit old(published in 1994) but I still find it relevant and interesting to read.
Personal Fiction/Autobiographical Fiction
White Girls by Hilton Als - I went to a reading of this book when it first came out. It was so much fun and so eye-opening for me as a baby queer in NYC that I bought the book there. I wanna be really clear that Als does not pull punches and a lot of people don’t quite like it, but I love Als’ style of writing. The stories and essays in this book are amazing and funny and heartbreaking and informative of queer experience - particularly black queer experience - that I always feel like...honored? to experience through writing? This is one of those ‘you’re gonna suffer but you’re gonna be happy about it’ reads - it can be hard to face because of how very hard the pills are to swallow but like....gosh I just love this book and it’s interesting and hilarious and great.
Confessions of an Economic Hitman by John Perkins - this is my tin hat favorite. It hits....ugh. This is one of those books that came out and like every government agency freaked the fuck out over it. It’s an interesting look into the quote-unquote dark underbelly of capitalism; how and why countries manipulate each other through economic policies. Super interesting read with a nice style of prose.
The Know-It-All: One Man's Humble Quest to become the Smartest Person in the World by A.J. Jacobs Okay so full disclosure I have not finished reading this, but I’m far enough through to rec it. This book chronicles the author’s attempt to read the entire Encyclopedia Brittanica from front to back, and it is just as kooky and hilarious as it sounds. I am very incredibly and deeply offended this author stole both my schtick and my initials, thereby preventing me from doing this exact thing. I read through the phone book in its entirety when I was three. I had it in me. Anyway, this is basically the author just listing weird interesting facts he’s read about and connecting them to his daily life, but it’s a fun read, and you learn a lot of totally useless facts, which is absolutely my jam.
When Skatboards Will Be Free by Saïd Sayrafiezadeh - HI I LOVE THIS BOOK. I’ve read it maybe three times over. It’s so fun and interesting. You may notice that a lot of the books I rec are very absurdist in their humor, and this is no exception. This book is full of the dry wit and just weird goddamn shit you could only expect from the child of a revolution that never came. You want to read a book about someone who Went Through Shit? Read this book. It’s funny and heartbreaking and just. AHHHH. Seriously I cannot recommend this enough.
Hyperbole and a Half by Allie Brosch - FIGHT ME ON THIS. I love this book.....so much. Yes it’s technically a comic book but the stories are so INTERESTING and hilarious and full of exactly the dry absurdist humor I eat the fuck up. Also! Allie Brosch recently released a sequel of sorts called Solutions and Other Problems that I recommend without even reading it.
Poetry
Pansy by Andrea Gibson - IF YOU ARE NOT READING THE POETRY OF ANDREA GIBSON WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING WITH YOUR LIFE. I cried seven times reading this book. There are only like 14 poems. Please please read this to break your own queer heart :)
Bloodsport by Yves Olade - This is a tiny book full of absolutely devastating poetry. Most of it has to do with the grief of relationships, but like....gosh I love all of Olade’s stuff. (Also!! This is available as a pay-what-you-wish pdf!!)
Bright Dead Things by Ada Limón - This book focuses a lot on the author’s experiences of loss, and knowing that loss is going to happen. I’m completely devastated every time I read this.
Science Fiction/Fantasy
The Bartimeaus Sequence by Jonathan Stroud - So what if I am a dumb millennial I love this series. It’s another dry and deadpan humor, with weird additions and Stroud’s use of footnotes to absolutely crack me the fuck up means I gotta rec this. I just gotta. Four(I think?) books following the deeply unlikeable Nathaniel and his Djinn Bartimaeus, who just wants to eat humans and have a deeply enjoyable enemies to lovers plotline with his arch rival.
The Magic's Price Trilogy by Mercedes Lackey - Okay I know I’ve recced this before. I will rec it again. This was the very first series I ever read that featured a gay protagonist and I was. Devastated? Reformed? I latched onto Vanyel Ashkevron and I am never letting this depressed emo boy go. Try me, I bite. Seriously, this book was released in the 80s and yet it is still relevant, I still cry - god i LOVE this series SO MUCH. And, MERCEDES LACKEY actually invented unbury your gays, sorry I make the rule on that one. :) Also there are magic talking horses??????? Seriously please read this series I love it so much.
Fire Bringer & The Sight by David Clement-Davies - This is another series that was absolutely formative in my baby lexicon. These are books about magical animals and their inner societal workings and both books address the ideas of good, evil, darkness, compassion and good will, and destiny. I am obsessed with these books, they are some of the most interesting of the genre I’ve read, and so incredibly intricately written. LOVE these books.
Vampire Earth Series by E. E. Knight - The Witcher before it was cool. Sort of but like...there are schools of Cat, Bear, etc and it has COOL VAMPIRES I LOVE THSI SERIES. Basically, earth has been taken over by a race of alien ‘Vampires’ and follows a human involved in the resistance. The writing in this series is...wow. It’s so intricate and interesting and involved. I own the whole series because I love it so much, including the after-series hardback novels. I’m so messy and I love it.
Kindred by Octavia Butler - You know how people are like ‘YOU SHOULD READ OCTAVIA BUTLER!!’ ? You should absolutely do that. This novel is mindblowing and interesting and the pace and narrative are so so so interesting. Heartbreaking, god, horrific. Butler is an amazing writer and this novel, while my personal favorite, is not by any means the only of her books I would recommend. STORIES. STORIES!!!!!!!
Fiction
The Ballad of Barnabas Pierkiel: A Novel by Magdalena Zyzak - This book is so fucking good. It’s imaginative, funny, intelligent....it’s honestly one of the best fiction novels I’ve ever read. Again, dry, absurdist humor, this book sort of reminds me of Terry Pratchett’s style of writing.
The Call of the Wild by Jack London - This is a classic, a true classic. The social commentary of this book is so so good, London’s style flows and, personally, as a dog and animal expert, the anthropomorphisation of Buck and his fellow animals is just so well done. I love this book, it’s quite an easy read, and I reread it at least once a year.
Rolling the R's by R. Zamora Linmark - Okay. Okay okay!!!!!! I gotta take a deep breath about this one. This book is. Yuh. This is a bit younger leaning than the other fictions, focusing almost entirely on high school level characters, however the experiences and commentary is just so so good. Focusing on a diverse group of characters growing up in Hawaii in the 1970′s, this book addresses the intersectionalities of gender, sexuality, race, immigration, education, and how we define who we are. I’m obsessed.
A Separate Peace by John Knowles - A heartbreaking novel about war, innocence, adolescence, and how we hide from our truths. It’s...so good, this book hurts me a LOT okay. The prose is phenomenal, the story is poignant, and it feels like I’m ripping my own heart out with a fishhook every time I finish it.
The Toss of a Lemon by Padma Viswanathan - This is one of those books I half recommend because it’s so good, and half because of the deep wealth of knowledge it presents the reader. The author’s use of her own culture is just....goddddddddd. Intricate and interesting and so delicately included in the narrative that you can feel the love the author has for it. It’s a long read and it took me almost a month to get through reading every day, but god. It’s so soft and amazingly written I both wanted to read it all at once and take my time with it. This is another one that deals with the duality of humanity and how we connect with one another. Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!
P.S. Your Cat Is Dead by James Kirkwood Jr. - I love this book I love this book I LOVE THIS BOOK. It’s fucking hilarious, entertaining, I literally laughed out loud at every single chapter. Hilarious and poignant and surprisingly deep, this book literally follows the journey of a man in which literally everything that could go wrong does. It’s fucking hilarious.
I hope that helped and gave you some new books!!! <3
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TROS Reaction 12-20-19. AKA my 6 page long dissertation about why I really disliked TROS.
I didn’t think it would be this bad. I truly thought there would be some gleaming moments of redeemability, but no. It’s one...giant...shit-show. What a horrible blow to the end of not only the sequel trilogy and these characters but to everything that came before. It really takes skill to mess up this badly.
A little something nice though, was the guy I sat next to. Really nice (and cute too ^-^ ) and he offered me some of his candy (Buncha Crunch! My favorite!) before the film started and then throughout the film because he said, “Well this is consolation for having to sit next to me.” Aw I couldn’t have asked for a better seat partner, I didn’t even know him! And then when the film ended he knew I didn’t take it well and I cried and shook through many moments and he offered the rest of his candy and I said, “Thanks, I think I need it.” I asked him what he thought overall and he said, “C-3P0 was pretty funny.” I said, “Yeah I agree. I actually knew everything that happened before I saw it, and I thought it was a mess.” He chuckled and said, “Me too, but I didn’t want to say anything in case you liked it.” I said, “Oh, no, I didn’t really like it. But I gotta be honest, Ben Solo didn’t deserve to die. That’s just my opinion.” I think he was surprised by that but didn’t disagree. He just kinda nodded or something and then we said goodbye and he left with his buddies, who also seemed pretty unenthused by the whole movie. Hopefully I gave him something to think about with my comment, but he was really nice and I’m glad he sat next to me.
Pessimism aside for now, I’ll start by listing the things I liked. I gotta be honest, there’s not much here.
Reylo is canon! But, in my opinion, it was handled pretty badly. Ben’s death is only the start of the problems for it, but more on that later.
C-3P0 is funny I guess. Yes he is annoying sometimes like usual, but not more so than other times.
D-O is freaking adorable. Out of everything good I’ve listed I have no qualms with this one. His manner is cute, his speaking is very funny, and his actions are just precious.
Babu Frik is very cute too, just perfect! Lovely little puppet! Don’t know why he was shoehorned in at the end battle but whatever. We never saw him again.
Maz is a puppet now? Okay, cool. Wish that would’ve been the case since the beginning. You had the technology JJ.
The music is good, when it’s given its own time to shine and be noticed. I feel like I barely noticed it was there because sound effects just drowned it out. Really wasted, but still good nonetheless.
Leia’s death and how it affected Ben. Wow. This was the first moment I truly cried. This was handled very well by Adam Driver, and then Maz saying “Goodbye, Princess.” Ouch, that got me.
Ben talking to the memory of his father! This is something I did not know was in the movie and boy am I glad I wasn’t spoiled for it! THIS is where the really hard tears and sobbing came. I was literally shaking and shivering trying to keep it in so as not to disturb everyone else. This. Part. Was. Perfect. Ben looks at him like he wants to say “I love you,” and Han says out loud “I know.” *crazy screaming and crying* Out of all the things they got wrong for Ben in this film, THIS they got right!
Ben Solo is the Solo boy we always wanted. Running in with a t-shirt, gun slinging, blasting opponents without even looking. THIS is a true son of Solo! But of course they give him no lines except “Ow.” THAT was a bad idea.
And that’s it. Yes those are the only things I even remotely liked, but I have to be honest, each one of these has some kind of problem attached to it which sours the real enjoyment.
On to what I disliked. Strap in lads, this is going to be a long ride.
1. The pacing. OH. MY. GOSH. SLOW. THE. FUCK. DOWN. For fucks sake I couldn’t even process what the hell was happening before we were on to the next thing! This was the biggest problem with the movie, BY FAR. Yes I know the story is terrible, we’ll get to that, but the pacing just completely took me out of the movie. I couldn’t feel invested in anything because it was all in one ear and out the other like ten-fold!
And this is part of the issue I have with how Reylo was handled. It. Felt. So. Rushed. And. Unfinished. There weren’t enough scenes with them and the scenes we did get were so fast and then over with that it felt like no progress was being made at all! It felt, for lack of a better word, unearned. And I know, that’s not really the case since they’ve had plenty of build-up in the last 2 films, but there wasn’t enough time with them spent NOT fighting and hating each other and opposing each other. Yes, I know, Kylo kept trying to get Rey to take his hand, but it doesn’t feel genuine because even Kylo feels out of character, and Rey too, big time. Now this isn’t the actor’s faults, they did what they could with the shitty story they were given, so I put all this blame at JJ’s desk.
In any case the overall film pacing was too fast, too much, too soon, too many things onscreen, too many things happening at once, not enough character, not enough motivation, not enough letting scenes breathe and just play out naturally. Everything felt forced for the sake of the “plot.” Oh we gotta get this thing, and then that thing, to get this thing, so we can defeat these guys! LET. US. BREATHE.
2. The story. My gosh, they couldn’t have picked a worse storyline to follow. Everything truly felt like it was written by a fanboy who wanted to retcon everything in TLJ, even down to the dialogue. Everyone keeps saying to Rey “You’re a Palpatine.” But it sounds SO strange, like nobody says things like this. I get it, it’s a space fantasy, they talk weird mumbo jumbo but it just sounds like a fanboy ghost wrote this. Like we gotta have everyone know now she’s a Palpatine! You’re a Palpatine! You’re a Palpatine! Palpatine heir! All bow down to the Palpatine! Give me a break.
3. Yeah, let’s talk about Palps. The old raisin himself. You know, I never really liked ROTS, but Palps was always a great thing about it. He was sinister, diabolical, he had a plan and knew what to do with it. But this Palps. *le heavy sigh* What a waste this was. For one thing, the lightning effects that lights up his face is really annoying, even for someone who doesn’t get seizures, I can’t even imagine what it’s like for those who do, I’m so sorry. And like, he has this whole legion of Sith followers? The fuck? Where the hell were these guys before? I’m sure they existed BEFORE the last Sith Lord died, right?
I digress. I have a question though: why does he want Rey so much? Why didn’t he try to get his son to take over? Wouldn’t that have been easier? Also, WHO DID HE FUCK TO GET A SON?? HOW DID HIS SON GET AWAY FROM HIM?? WHY DID HIS SON APPARENTLY TURN TO THE LIGHT?? THERE’S TOO MANY QUESTIONS HERE AND NO GOOD EXPLANATIONS. AND NO DISNEY, I DON’T WANT A 10-PART COMIC ON THIS. GO FUCK YOURSELVES.
The only interesting thing about Palps in this film is that his face gets melted off like a Raiders of the Lost Ark knock-off. He better not be coming back. Ever again.
4. And hey, while we’re on the subject, let’s talk about Rey’s parents. So apparently they’re both good people. *le sigh* But what kind of good people leave their daughter alone on a harsh and unforgiving planet with a blubber guy? And don’t tell me they didn’t know he was an abusive asshole, they LIVED on Jakku, they HAD to have known him, ESPECIALLY if they truly were junk traders, they would have DEALT with him. Oh, and apparently the “I’ll come back for you sweetheart, I promise” line is changed up a bit and given to her father after all. No. Screw that. That line was meant for Ben, I don’t care how petty this sounds, this is terrible. So yeah, fuck Rey’s parents, I don’t care how “good” you try to make their intentions, they’re badly shoehorned in and they screw up anyway. Next.
5. Ben’s story and his fate. So yeah, obviously I hate that Ben died, but more than that I hate how his story was handled here. It was so rushed, it didn’t feel as natural as it should have. It needed time to BREATHE. A lot of time! And I feel like they really shafted Kylo/Ben’s story off to the side to give more time to the hereby named GoldenTrio. (You know who I mean...we’ll get to them.) It really seemed like JJ didn’t even care about Ben’s fate anymore, and just kind of put it in as an afterthought. His death scene? Not even given a fucking minute to process because WE GOT TO PARTAY. All in all, his whole story is so terribly sad that I don’t even know if I can watch TFA or TLJ anymore, knowing how it ends.
6. The GoldenTrio. Oh for fucks sake, JJ, you should have killed Poe off when you had the chance, because now the story is all about THEM. Boom! They’re literally front and center in the movie. I don’t even think Reylo gets as much screen time as them. I mean really, Ben’s death scene and Rey’s grieving gets 1.5 minutes, tops. GoldenTrio reunion and threesome hugging? 5 fucking minutes of nothing but them hugging. I’m not even exaggerating. (Okay maybe I am, but it’s given more focus and time to “breathe” than Ben Solo’s fucking death. I’m getting a headache remembering it.)
Hey, remember in ESB and ROTJ where the trio got split up and had their own story lines and own purposes to fulfill without each other hanging around (apart from Han and Leia because their story lines are interconnected)? Yeah, I miss that too.
Also, Rey keeps wandering off being “pulled” to something, and every...single...time, Finn is like “Rey, wait! Poe we gotta get her! rEy CoMe BaCk!!” This happens at least 5 times, pretty consecutively too. It gets old real fast. Boy do I miss the days of TLJ where people got to be away from each other to discover new things without interference.
Which leads me to another point: They tried to shove FinnRey in here while shitting on FinnRose quite literally. What. A. Slap. To. The. Face. This is horrible treatment, and I hope Kelly will never do another interview for Lucasfilm again. She doesn’t deserve this.
7. The Ending™. Wow. What a way to show that your characters haven’t progressed at all by showing them in the same environment that they started in. Let’s do an overview: Rey starts out alone on a desert planet and meets a droid that isn’t hers. Rey ends up alone on a desert planet with a droid that still isn’t hers. PROGRESSION 101!! *slaps forehead* I mean, don’t even get me started on the fact that Ben isn’t there with her and that literally one half of her soul is gone (how is she not in agony right now??), but then to add more salt to the wound she’s just like “oh yeah I must be the rightful successor to the Skywalker name, even tho I’m a Palps...makes sense to me!” Fuck off. You don’t deserve that title after hating Luke for not doing what you wanted him to do and for hating Ben for most of this movie too.
Can we also acknowledge that this is THE ABSOLUTE WORST POSSIBLE WAY TO END A 40 YEAR SAGA AND FAMILY LEGACY? So, Palps had a kid who had a kid. This kid is then deemed a-okay by the family that was affected most by Palps and they welcome her like the sunshine child she is, yet shun their own offspring for being damaged goods because he was being manipulated by said Palps. Okay, it’s official now, everyone’s an asshole...except Ben. He seemed to be the only one to understand his faults and right his wrongs and not be an idiot. Then the kid who was abused and manipulated is killed because “reasons” or “problematic” or whatever and the offspring of Palps lives while the family that Palps manipulated is ultimately gone forever because it’s last descendant wanted to save the offspring of Palps out of the goodness of his heart. Now the offspring of Palps doesn’t even give a flipping thank you and steals their name. wHaT a SaTiSfYiNg EnDiNg!!! Someone gag me.
8. Luke’s X-Wing being raised out of the water and it’s in perfect working condition. What. The. Fuck. I don’t know if you guys realize this, but this completely undermines Luke’s arc in TLJ. That X-Wing was sunk and dead to show that he had no desire to return to the outside world. He was staying on the island. For good. And he buried that thing in water to make sure he couldn’t use it ever again, but it was still visible to him to remind him of his conviction if ever he questioned it. But no. That thing is a-okay and ready to fly. No need for parts, there’s no rust or any sea salt corrosion, ready to go skipper! This was just added for easy call-backs to ESB but boy this had absolutely 0 weight to it. I literally yawned or looked at my watch around this part thinking “oh my gosh isn’t it over yet?” Pretty much sums up my entire experience.
9. Rose got shafted to appease the fanboys. This one needs no further explanation or analysis, it just sucks and has no real reason to exist.
10. Luke was barely in it and offered not that great advice. Poor Mark. His performance really peaked with TLJ and never went back up.
11. Rey is suddenly the Avatar now? You can now talk to all previous Jedi’s who existed? What buffoonery is this? Oh, but Ben doesn’t get a single. fucking. word. from Anakin, the man he looked up to. I’m so tired right now. What’s left?
12. The message changed from “it doesn’t matter if you’re a nobody, you’re a somebody to me” to “you’re a somebody with a bad bloodline, but that doesn’t define you (except when it totally does)”. That sort of message would be fine if it had been the message since TFA, but it wasn’t. The message since TFA was “I’m a nobody, but I can become a somebody regardless of my lineage or my childhood.” Why change the message in the 11th hour? To appease fanboys. Literally anything that makes no sense in this movie can be attributed to fanboys. There’s so much contradiction and hypocrisy in this film from both the narrative and the characters that it’s insulting.
13. Hux was utterly shafted too. What a waste of a well built up and conniving little bastard who in the end gets shot for shock value and laughs. It’s like what TLJ did but way worse because he’s actually killed. Hux as the spy? Just no.
14. Jannah was kind of wasted too, not enough screen time. I get her and Finn kind of bonding over being ex-stormtroopers, but it’s not really delved into. Also the whole “nature vs. machinery” thing kinda briefly shows up at the big battle and feels unearned too, because there was nothing before in this movie or others to suggest there was a war between the two.
15. Poe is treated more as the heir to Leia than Ben is. Poe gets to fly the falcon and gets to wreck it up (dishonoring who it belonged to before), gets to be by Leia’s deathbed, etc. Not earned at all.
16. The pointlessness of random cameos or thrown in references. Not a single person in my theater noticed John Williams as the bartender, nobody pointed out or said anything about any reference from previous movies, it was silent.
17. What the hell was even the point of the whole “Dark Rey” vision? Oh, she shows her scary pointy teeth ala Bilbo style. No thank you.
18. Why the hell does it feel like these characters aren’t the characters from TFA and TLJ? They feel so different and it’s noticeable.
19. Finn is Force sensitive. Literally tacked on like nobody wouldn’t notice. We noticed JJ. We notice everything.
20. Rey and Kylo/Ben fighting for way too much of the film and their interactions. Not enough caring or understanding, not enough longing looks, it feels like their romance was almost cut from the film entirely.
21. Oh yeah, Rey floating at the beginning? Looked stupid as hell. And the “Be with me” line? I thought maybe, just maybe, she meant Ben, but no. She’s trying to reach “her past selves” like the fucking Avatar and she’s even floating rocks around like Aang did. Ugh.
22. Anything else? Oh yeah, this movie sucks completely and wholly...FOR NOT GIVING ONE FUCKING LINE OF DIALOGUE TO BEN SOLO AFTER HE HAD BEEN REDEEMED. HOW HEARTLESS CAN YOU BE THAT YOU LET HIM DIE WITHOUT SAYING ONE FINAL THING?!?! DAMN J.J. YOU’RE STUPID.
And that’s it. Kudos if you read the whole thing. I ramble a lot.
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𝒮𝓉𝑒𝓅 𝒷𝓎 𝒮𝓉𝑒𝓅 𝒯𝒽𝓇𝑜𝓊𝑔𝒽 𝐹𝑒𝒶𝓇
part one of an obi wan kenobi x senator!reader trilogy
summary: You save Obi Wan using the force, both of you are shook. You then strike a deal.
a/n: Surprise bitches it’s two days early!! This was based on this ask from a long-ass time ago and was reeeeally fun to write. There were a a lot of different routes I could’ve taken with the story, but I’m happy with where it went. Hope you guys are, too.
wordcount: 2071 (WHEW)
warnings: mild violence, semblance of a panic attack
taglist: @karasong @kaminobiwan @snips-n-skyguy0501 @captain-skytrash(let me know if you’d like to be tagged in this work, future Obi Wan works, or overall!)
The moment was brief, and yet it changed everything.
Your eyes had begun to burn from staring at the quivering blaster shot. The only sound was the deep reverberations of the force and your heavy, shaking breath. The man whom you’d risked your life for scrambled up, taking out the figure behind the gun before carefully stepping over to you.
He held up his hands in the cautious way one does when approaching a frightened animal. “Senator, you can let go,” he whispered, and it was as if those were the only words holding you together.
Your exhale came out as more of a sob. The blaster shot resumed its path, leaving a scorch mark in the Coruscanti marble floor of your quarters. The only thing keeping you from crumbling into panic was Obi Wan’s hands gripping your upper arms. You thought you felt him soothingly tracing small circles into your shoulder and you shook your head slightly to better focus on the situation at hand.
“Where did they come from, t-the assassin?” you spluttered as Obi Wan approached the body. He knelt by the body and glanced at the window, a look of suspicion painted on his face.
“I don’t recognize him. Must be working on his own, but we can’t be sure. I’ll meet with the council.” he said. A lump was forming in your throat as you chewed your lip, unable to tear your eyes away from the new lifeless decoration on the ground. Footsteps tapped across the marble closer to you. Obi Wan appeared in your tear-blurred vision, brows knit in concern. You had trouble meeting his eyes. You felt ashamed for showing weakness and fear of death in front of such a practiced and skilled warrior. Not only that, but a handsome warrior you’d grown fond of over the past months you’d been on Coruscant.
“Senator?” The world snapped back into your brain. After taking a deep breath into your aching lungs, you met his gaze. “The council will make sure that you’re safe. I will make sure that you’re safe,” he half-whispered. You nodded, staying silent out of the fear that your voice might crack and then the lid would be lifted off your terror.
You didn’t want someone so strong to see you so pathetically weak.
Obi Wan straightened as a few clones entered. “Increase security measures around her room. Don’t miss a corner, window, or ,” he ordered. As the clones exited, Obi Wan trailed behind, but not before sparing you one last reassuring look. A smile managed its way onto your face and you jutted your chin out to show an illusion of bravery. Although, as soon as the pair of doors closed, your knees buckled and you hit the floor harshly.
This was never part of your plan. You’d come from a struggling planet, Nuca, in hopes of providing resources and protection for your people, who had been struggling with invasive Seperatist forces for many moons. It had taken a year for you to gain any kind of respect from many fellow senators simply because you came from a world that wasn’t nearly as gaudy as the rest of them. Homesickness had simmered in you during the first month. Coruscant bore no semblance to Nuca’s tropical forests and low-lying volcanoes dusted with brilliant wildflowers. Instead, you were cornered by far too many shades of beige. You’d tried to grow a few of Nuca’s native plants in your quarters, but the change of climate caused them to wilt and crumble.
You hoped it wasn’t an omen.
Now your world had been thrown off-kilter. The Force was never something you’d concerned yourself with. You’d always believed it was meant for the Jedi and the Sith, a weapon wielded only by a chosen group. Senatorial duties had taken up so much of your day-to-day life that the Force and its influence almost never reached you. The only thing that exposed you to the mysteries of the Force was the Jedi Order. You’d become interested in one of their members recently. More specifically, it was the one that had touched your shoulder and looked at you with borderline-ardent affection just moments earlier.
Obi Wan had strolled onto your path just a few months ago. You’d been on more diplomatic off-world missions recently, which meant you were often flanked by a Jedi, but you definitely weren’t bothered. You weren’t bothered when you were accompanied by Obi Wan, at least. Missions and high-stress visits became less stressful in his presence. His clever humor and sarcasm almost caused a break in your composure numerous times, but you weren’t angry. Upon arriving, you’d usually be nervous, but his calm demeanor helped you take a deep breath and negotiate. His presence helped you find your footing.
Sometimes he would come dangerously close to catching you staring at him. Whether it was talking to a member of the council or standing in a LAAT/i, you couldn’t help but focus on him in all his mystery. He was commanding yet gentle, always making sure that you were comfortable although letting you handle tense conversations. Perhaps that’s what drew you to him: his trust in your abilities to negotiate. It was high, silent praise coming from ‘The Negotiator.’
Your head fell back as you stared wordlessly at the ceiling. There wasn’t time to reminisce, to hide away from your discovery. For now, it would have to be set aside. You had a meeting to get to. Even if an entire squadron of clones had to drag you out for your own safety, you had to at least show up. It was common courtesy.
After a year as a senator in the Galactic Republic, you’d learned to keep your chin up in the winding hallways of the senate building. Despite the blood pounding in your head and the sweat on your palms, the mask of determination on your face remained intact.
Once you entered the sunlit meeting room, the chatter of the other senators fell quiet. You set your jaw and locked eyes with a fellow senator, one whom you held a tremendous amount of respect for: Padmé Amidala.
“Senators, good afternoon. It seems the party has already begun without me. Please, continue,” you said, attempting to ease the tension. You really just wanted to move on from the earlier incident. It seemed that your colleagues didn’t share your eagerness, however.
Padmé uttered your name softly before she stood, giving you a pitying look. “Take the rest of the day. After the attempt on your life, you’re not in the mindset to focus on diplomacy.” She looked around at her fellow senators. “No one would.”
Her resolve nearly angered you. She was one of the strongest people you’d ever met, and somehow it still shocked you when she would stand her ground. “Senator Amidala, I’m perfectly alright. I am uninjured and ready to resume my duties,” you declared, breaking her gaze and sitting in your chair. You made sure to keep your back straight. Any sign of weakness after an assassination attempt would mean an immediate exile to your quarters, likely for the rest of the week.
Luckily, she backed off, lowering into her seat and squaring her shoulders. The room’s tension sank back into nothingness and you exhaled quietly.
As the meeting inched along past the two hour mark, you became lost in your own thoughts. Thoughts of your home ricocheted in your mind until suddenly, the sound of breaking glass lurched you back into the room. Every pair of eyes in the room locked on you as you felt your heart struggling to slip past your ribs. Then you noticed that you were no longer sitting, your hands in fists on the tabletop. You hesitated, though, when you glimpsed confusion in the gazes of your colleagues.
On the far end of the table, one of the newer senators had dropped whatever cocktail glass they were sipping from. You furiously blinked away incoming tears, shaking your head.
It sounded exactly like the window just a few hours ago. You could’ve sworn…
“Excuse me for a moment,” you mumbled, nearly knocking your chair to the floor as you stumbled out of the room. Your ears rang as the hallway blurred in front of your eyes. Someone could help, you knew that. All you needed to do was find that person. That task was becoming more difficult by the second, especially because you had no idea where the person or their quarters were located.
With no clue what your body was reacting to, you swallowed and straightened to the best of your ability. Salvation finally offered you a merciful hand when you turned the corner.
Your favorite Jedi was a ways in front of you, practically gliding down the hallway, and beamed upon spotting you. His pace quickened, however, when his eyes flit over your exhausted frame. At last, it felt like the world gave you permission to let go. You slumped against the wall, deflated.
Obi Wan’s hands on your arms were enough to coax your gaze to his concerned expression. The sound of your name falling from his lips felt like it was worlds away. Something wet on your cheek pulled you partially out of your daze. You were crying. The tear vanished soon after its presence was known, a calloused thumb brushing it away.
Before you knew it, he was leading you through the hallways, a hand on the small of your back. Other figures strolling through the halls stared at the Jedi half-carrying a senator. Once you arrived at your quarters, he helped you sit on a simple chair by your desk with a surprising amount of gentleness. The wood was rough under your fists while he sat beside you.
“You’re safe, no one is going to hurt you here,” Obi Wan whispered. You managed to nod and take another deep breath.
“Someone broke a glass and I thought...it sounded just like-” you babbled. Obi Wan nodded, having put the pieces together. “I hate this,” you mumbled. “I don’t want to feel so weak. It feels like I’m not in control, that my life isn’t in my own hands. And now I find out that I can use the Force. Maker, it has been a long day.” The hand you were dragging down your face was plucked away and grasped by Obi Wan. A blush crept over your cheeks as you peered over at him. He avoided your eyes, focused instead on his hand encasing yours.
“The universe is never going to be safe for people like you,” he said. When you raised a brow and waited for him to elaborate, he sighed and finally locked eyes with you. “You’re trying to make things better for your people. There are always going to be people who want to snuff out the light you’ve brought here, to the Republic.” His soft smile lit what felt like a million candles in your chest.
“I represent Nuca in everything I do, in everything that the public and my colleagues see. I’ve been here for a blink of an eye compared to other senators. If I slip up even once, it could spell disaster. I can’t afford to be seen as a coward, even if I am.” More tears were forming in your eyes. Everything that you’ve worked for was crumbling around you. You could feel your heart start to pound again.
“I don’t see a coward. You’re struggling, yes, but being frightened does not make you a coward,” Obi Wan firmly declared. You smiled at him. It wasn’t faked this time, you truly valued his opinion. He took a shaky breath. “If I taught you how to use the Force...would you think more highly of yourself?”
You blinked. He wanted to teach you? “General Kenobi, I doubt you have time to-”
“Midnight tonight in the training arena at the temple,” he blurted, a grin quickly forming on his bearded face. You couldn’t help but smile at his eagerness. Perhaps he was right. Additionally, you’d get to spend some time with him. You’d come to realize that he was quite easy on the eyes, to say the least.
“Alright,” you agreed. His boots softly tapped on the marble floor as he traipsed to the exit. He gave you the same smile as he did the last time he left, and slipped out.
#Obi Wan Kenobi x reader#Star Wars x reader#star wars#obi wan#Obi Wan kenobi#fanfiction#Star Wars fanfiction#the clone wars#tcw fanfiction#tcw fanfic#Obi Wan Kenobi fanfiction
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Star Wars 101
Masterlist
Gender: Female
Pairing: Peter Parker x reader
Warning: None
Reader has never seen a single one of Peter's favorite movies.
A/N- I really need to stop making new series lol, I swear this is the last new one for a while, at least until I finish some other ones.
Hope you like it!!!
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"In case I don't see you... good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight!"
Peter watched you intently as you stared, wide eyes glued to each and every movement on the screen, even sniffling a bit when the credits began to roll. Really? The Truman Show was making you tear up?
"[Y/N], really?," he snickered lightly, wiping one of your cheeks and then showing you the wetness on his finger. He gave a teasing smile as he moved to take the DVD out. "I understood when you cried during the Titanic, but this is just The Truman Show."
"Don't judge me!," you scolded, cheeks quickly becoming red with embarrassment. "It was frickin' sad! The dude's been stuck in a tv show his whole life and he didn't even know it! That's freaky!"
"It's a Jim Carrey movie," Peter laughed. "How can you cry at a Jim Carrey movie?"
You rolled your eyes and turned away, trying to hide your growing grin. Who was Peter Parker to judge you on how you react to movies anyway? At least this was just a movie. Peter got flustered with everything in real life!
"-And a movie as crappy as this particular Jim Carrey movie too!," he smirked.
You turned around with a loud, overdramatic gasp. "What was that, Parker? Did you just call one of my favorite movies CRAPPY?!"
Peter turned from the DVD player with a small, innocent smile and nodded his head vigorously before sprinting away as he predicted that you would chase after him.
He was right.
"How dare you!," you yelled, quickly jumping into action. "Jim Carrey may be a bit of an overacter, but he's still AWESOME!!"
You were high on adrenaline, running after him with all you had, but it didn't take you long for you to realize that chasing Peter in his own house was a bad idea. It was his home. He knew it like the back of his hand. And you, however, did not.
You bumped into every other corner. The more you ran the more bruises you were probably getting. Until finally after hitting your hip on the kitchen counter, frustrated, you squeezed your eyes shut tight and yelled out, "YOU DON'T HEAR ME JUDGING YOUR CRAPPY STAR WARS MOVIES!!!"
You hadn't seen where he came from or how he got you, but in an instant, Peter was smack dab in your face. "What did you just say?"
Quickly coming to a stop, the corners of your mouth twitched upwards, knowing you'd just hit a nerve. "I said, you don't hear me judging your crappy star wars movies."
He stared, stunned, for a second. ".. you did not just say that," he whispered, more to himself than to you. He turned towards you. "You did not just call one of the best franchises in the universe crappy."
You turned away with a smirk before he gently grabbed you by your arm and whirled you back around. "[Y/N]. Star Wars is ICONIC!"
You rolled your eyes with a light giggle and turned to walk away before you were whirled around again. His eyes looked right into yours, his face holding an extremely serious expression, which of course was nothing but hilarious to you. "Dude, I'm NOT letting you leave this kitchen before you give me a valid reason why Star Wars is bad to you."
You sighed loudly. So he's holding you hostage now, is he? Well, two could play at that game. "Not until you tell me why The Truman Show was so bad," you shot back.
Unfortunately for you, Peter was ready with his reasons.
You stared, dumbfounded as he read them off. "Predictable. Took too long to get where it was trying to go. When it finally got there, it didn't give an actual satisfying ending! Did Sylvia find him after that or not?! And what point was the movie trying to make about the world anyway? That really wasn't clear. Also, I couldn't tell whether some parts were funny or them just trying too hard to be serious. Should I go on?"
"N-no no, you're good," you chirped, your voice cracking a bit. "Didn't know you were such a harsh critic, Pete."
"And your reasons?," Peter asked with a shit-eating grin. He knew you didn't have any.
You scrunched your eyebrows together and stared up to the ceiling. "Umm," you mumbled before you blurted out. "It just seems like classic NERD crap, honestly okay?!?!?!"
Peter dramatically threw his hand to his chest, as if he'd been stabbed. "Ah, you hurt me, babe. How could you?"
You rolled your eyes. "Can we just go back to watching movies, Pete?! My hip frickin' hurts." You shifted slightly while rubbing the your hip with your hand, trying to relieve the pain. Peter noticed and immediately the previous topic of conversation was dropped.
"A-are you okay?! C'mon, let's go sit down.."
You breathed a breath of relief. Thankfully, a dumbass situation stopped due to Peter's relentless helpfulness and need to be a gentleman.
-
An hour later and you were watching Mean Girls now, something both you and Peter could agree on, especially after he'd told you he'd never seen it before.
And how could he have never seen Mean Girls? It was ICONIC!
"Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen. It's NOT going to happen..."
"I don't like this Regina character," Peter mumbled as he reached for more popcorn.
"You wouldn't," you chuckled softly.
Peter Parker was a sap and an overall nice guy. Regina George was probably not a character that he would be caught fanboying over.
"I mean," he started again, squinting his eyes at the character on the screen. "Villain characters are supposed to be BADASS. She's just rude."
You threw your head back and laughed, ruffling his hair. "Only you would think that way, Pete."
"And this Cady character," he continued. "She can't honestly think she's doing all of this and is still a good person. How is she a proper protagonist?"
You rolled your eyes and smiled. You hadn't noticed until actually watching a few movies with Peter how much of a movie critic he was. And he took it seriously. "Okay, that's enough rotten tomatoes for one movie, Pete."
Peter shrugged, rolled his eyes, and laid back on the couch. "I'm just calling it like I see it."
He kept quiet after that, just giving grunts, hums, and muttering things at choice times.
When your favorite part came along, Regina getting hit by the bus, you bit your lip with a smile. "Oooh, wait for it," you said lightly slapping Peter's shoulder excitedly. "She's gonna get it."
"So don't act all innocent! You can take that fake apology and shove it right up your hairy-"
Just as the part you were waiting for came, Peter paused the tv.
Quickly, you turned to him, eyes wide. "What'd you do that for?!?! She was gonna get smashed!"
He turned towards you, narrowing his eyes slightly. "So you've never watched Star Wars before?"
You turned to face him. "What?"
"What you said earlier... You said that it seems like nerdy crap," he explained, piecing it all together. " Seems! Meaning that you don't know for a fact meaning that you haven't watched it!"
"Are we seriously still on that,?!" you teased, your smile widening. This whole thing was beyond frivolous to you.
"Well yeah, because it's one of the greatest series ever!"
"It's predictable!"
"It is known for one of the biggest reveals in cinematic HISTORY!"
"What, the 'I-am-your-father' scene? Yeah, totally predictable."
Peter's jaw completely dropped. "Wha- how?!"
"Y'know Vader in German means father, right?," you snickered. "His name is literally Darth father." You picked up a soda, shaking your head slightly. "But yeah, if you must know... I haven't seen Star Wars."
Peter stopped responding. He just stood up and stepped away silently.
"Are you seriously mad over this?," you yelled out, watching him with a frown. "It's just a movie..."
Was he brooding right now? Over something as dumb as Star Wars? Well, you certainly weren't gonna be the person to go after him.
You whipped your head back to the screen in front of you and unpaused the movie, waiting for your friend to come back to sit next to you. It was official, Peter Parker was a nerd bitch.
As the movie went on, eventually you'd forgotten that Peter was even gone.
"The limit does not exist!"
It sucked that he left, but still though, you wouldn't rather be anywhere else. Surrounded by popcorn, pretzels, fruit, fruit roll ups, and practically any snack you could think of. Endlessly watching movies on a Saturday morning. Well, technically it was the afternoon now. But you'd lost track of time by about the sixth movie.
However, there was only so much movies could do for you. As time passed on, it started to weigh on you. You'd come there to see Peter, not Mean Girls. But if there was one thing to get on a nerd's nerves, it would be Star Wars wouldn't it?
Ugghhhhh.
After much anticipation, you finally decided to go up to his room and talk to him.
You turned to walk up the stairs and was immediately collided with a big wall.
Well not a wall, Peter.
And not just Peter. Peter with a gigantic box in his arms.
"Sorry it took me so long, didn't mean to leave you waiting. I was just just trying to find this," he said, tapping the cardboard box with his fingers. "So did you finish the movie?"
"Yeah," you said, looking at the box. "What's in it?"
"Guess I'll finish it myself later then..." He pushed past you and sat the box on the couch.
"What's in the box, Peter?," you repeated, trying to get a good look at it.
"Oh nothing," he said dramatically, taking the Mean Girls DVD out of the DVD player. "Just what will soon be the best 25 hours of your life.."
"25 hours?"
Peter smiled. "That's how long the entire Star Wars trilogy is." He picked up the box cutter. "24 hours and 52 mintues actually, if you're doing the original editions of the original trilogy instead of the special edition." He turned back towards you. "You need a movie-cation and I'm gonna give it to you."
"A movie-cation?"
"Movie education, [Y/N]."
You held your head back and laughed. "Oh my God, Pete.."
He was on his knees in front of you in a second. "C'mon!! Please, it's the best. I promise you won't regret it!"
Ugh. This was it. You were gonna do this. Force yourself through 25 (24: 52, but who's counting?) hours of boredom just to please some guy that wasn't even your boyfriend. I mean, he was practically begging you. God help you.
"Fine! Fine.. I'll watch your lame nerd movie."
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@underoosjae @spn-assemble-seven @of-your-eyes-begonia-skies @parkerpeter24, @audreylovespidey706
#avengers#marvel#peter parker x yn#marvel fanfiction#peter parker fanfiction#peter parker fic#peter parker x reader#peter parker x y/n#peter parker#peter parker fluff#peter parker imagine#peter parker oneshot#marvel fandom#marvel x you#marvel x reader
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I’m here to prove that Andrew Garfield’s portrayal of Spider-man/peter parker in The Amazing Spider-Man is objectively the best love action adaptation of the character. In this essay I will....(yes this is really happening)
Edit: 10/20/20- i want to indulge myself in spiderman content but finding non mcu spiderman content is exhausting so imma update this instead
TL;DR
Andrew Garfield is my favorite of the 3 Spider-Man actors. TAS’s Peter is more fun and dynamic than the cookie cutter “shy introverted nerd that has a crush on a girl who’s way out of his league” Peter in Tobey Maguire’s movies. I enjoy Tom Holland’s portrayal of the character, but hate the way Disney has written the movies. I enjoy the characters, plot, and humor of The Amazing Spider-Man far more than the other 2, and i deeply wish we had gotten the third movie with the canon BIder-Man of Andrew’s (and my) dreams.
[DISCLAIMER: I HAVE NOT SEEN THE AMAZING SPIDERMAN 2 OR ANY MCU SPIDERMAN MOVIES OUTSIDE OF CLIPS AND REVIEWS ITS ALSO BEEN A VERY HOT MINUTE SINCE IVE SEEN A TOBEY MAGUIRE MOVIE]
Characterization
Most arguments against Andrew Garfield’s Spidey( AG’s from now on) begin and ends with “he was a good Spider-Man but a bad Peter Parker”. This references an outdated post comparing all three Spidey actors.(Id attach the image here but i dont want the post to be too long(thats a lie this is so long what am i doing with my life)) The post also claims that Tobey played a good Peter and a poor Spidey; and that Tom is good at both “roles”.(Honestly I think it seems silly that this seems obey the “third time’s the charm” rule but thats just me). Most people using this seem to be Tobey stans who have forgotten or ignored the rest of the post funnily enough, but the ones that go further into the WHY AG is a poor Peter are also incorrect. This argument also ignores the idea that there can be more than one version of Peter Parker which is blatantly incorrect. Just look at Into the Spiderverse or the PS4 game; these provide 4(5 if you count the pig) versions of Peter themselves, and that doesnt even include the comics.
Arguments that go further in depth claim that the AS Peter is too cool or well liked by his peer to be a “true” Peter Parker. The evidence for this seems to be that Peter has a skateboard.(which what? didnt realize that having a skateboard would instantly make you cool brb guys). Adding to that i dont really see where people get the idea that Peter is popular or well liked. While looking for complaints i found this qutoe from reddit(theyve since deleted it looks like but i’ll add a link in the notes) “He's angsty, pretty socially awkward, has an aptitude for science, and is kind of an outsider. He gets bullied by Flash and he gets his ass kicked after trying to stand up to Flash. He isn't a "cool" person in any way (until the ending, in which he's best buds with Flash, so I'll give you that). While Maguire is more accurate to the 60s comics where Peter in high school is just a fucking loser with basically no friends, in the ultimate comics, Peter is more of the kid who has a small amount of friends, but isn't popular.”. Honesty i fully agree with this because once again, other versions of a character are allowed to exist. You can dislike one version, but its silly to dislike something for not being exactly like another thing.
Ive also heard that Peter isnt “nerdy enough” in this movie which really doesnt make any sense considering the entire plot happens because Peter was looking into some of his parents’ research. If he wasn't interested in looking further into his father’s work what reason would he have to go to Oscorp where he’s bitten by the spider? Why would he have become Dr. Conner’s assistant? If he wasn’t intelligent how did he develop the web shooters?(something that Tobey!Peter doesn't have to do out of plot convenience might i add).
Another complaint i see is that the quips he uses in the movie(the first one specifically it seems) makes him seem like an asshole. Honestly thats a fair complaint, but i think its a good bit of characterization; espcially if he does get better about it in the second movie like the internet suggests.The Peter in this movie is a rightfully angsty teen; of course he acts a bit of an ass to criminals(also i feel like its important to mention that he’s like that to criminals? its not like hes being a dick for no reason).
Compare this with the Tobey Maguire(TM) movies. Like i said i haven’t seen these in awhile but as far as i’m aware TM’s Peter doesn't really do anything particularly nerdy in the film? I may have forgotten something( ok in the scene before he gets bitten he knows a cool spider fact) but he doesn’t have to invent the web-shooters because they came with his powers and he’s only at Oscorp in the first place because it’s a school field trip that he appears to be taking photos for. This Peter does fit the definition of outcast(friendless and bullied for it), but honestly i just dont like him. He’s weird and something about the character makes me feel like i should be a little grossed out every time he looks at MJ at the beginning of the movie.
I honestly don’t have any complaints for Tom Holland’s(TH’s)Spidey. Tom is a great actor and from what ive seen i enjoy his portrayal of the character.( He made me cry when i character i actively dislike died).
Story
I cant really say much for TAS story. It’s interesting but nothing special really. However, there is one scene that i don’t think i’ve seen anything like since( the closest would probably be the train scene in the original trilogy).
The crane scene. Early in the film Peter saves a boy from a car that has fallen off of a bridge, and at the end of the movie this becomes relevant again when it is uncertain that Peter will be able to get to the lizard to stop him in time.(as Peter is already injured and pretty far from the lizard’s location). The boy’s father is then revealed to be a construction worker who recognizes that Spider-man is going to need help to get to the lizard; he remembers how Spider-Man saved his son and organizes the rest of the construction workers to build a path out of crane arms for SM to swing from. All of them are putting themselves in danger by not evacuating, but SM’s actions in the first act of the film motivate them to do what’s right.
I love this scene primarily because it highlights something that i think is a really important part of Spider-Man’s character; his connection to the people he saves. SM is often shown interacting with and chatting with the people he has saved after the fact. One comic shows Peter accidentally scaring some bullies and then taking the time to ride the bus to school with them to continue their conversation and educate the students on bullying.( There’s definitely more but this is off the top of my head).
Another scene in TAS that i love is shortly before the crane scene when Peter is originally attempting to make his way across the city to stop the lizard, and he is shot down by the police. They manage to unmask him before Peter comes to his senses( he had just been shot and fallen pretty far out of the sky in his defense). From there Peter is able to deal with the police while keeping any of them from getting a good look at his face. The one cop he cant take out happens to be Gwen Stacey’s father who had previously had an argument with Peter about Spider-Man(Peter obviously on SM’s side and Mr. Stacey against SM). Peter turns and allows Captain(?) Stacey to see his face. I believe that this is an example of an unwilling identity reveal done right. i really enjoyed this moment because Peter had just shown that he likely could have gotten out of this encounter with his identity in tact as he had just taken down however many men. This implies that it was an active choice on Peter’s end to trust that Captain Stacey would ultimately do the right thing and allow Peter to go fight the Lizard, rather than a final desperate attempt to get away unscathed. Whether or not this interpretation of the scene is correct or not it still gives the character a bit more agency than some versions have done with their identity reveals.
In Spider-Man 2 Peter starts to lose his powers because he’s having internal conflict about wether or not he should be Spider-Man. Honestly thats kinda neat and i might want to give that a rewatch. As for the one i have seen i don’t have any complaints. I do however prefer the way that Peter was bitten in TAS because it was a result of him poking around where he shouldn’t’ve been rather than him just happening to be standing in the right place for a spider to land on him.
Onto TH’s movies; the way Disney has treated Spidey in the MCU is why TH’s is my least favorite version of the character. I feel like too much of the story revolves around Iron Man; Iron Man made Peter’s suit and equipment, Iron Man introduces Peter to the MCU(via blackmail but thats another rant for another annoyingly long post), its Iron Man that “makes” Spidey in this universe rather than Spidey being self-made. In Homecoming(which remember i havent seen outside of clips so bear with me) most of the conflict is cause directly or indirectly by Tony’s refusal or inabilty to communicate with the teenager he’s meant to be mentoring
For one the entire incident with the ferry could have very easily been avoided had Tony bothered to communicate with Peter enough to tell him that the situation was being taken care of. On top of that at the moive’s climax Peter is shown trying to get in contact with Happy(from what ive picked up isnt he a chauffeur? like idk his deal i just know he’s someone Peter got pawned off onto after Civil War). Peter even goes as far as to somehow hack into Happy’s phone(i think thats what happened it was a weird tech thing that shouldve been a red flag that the call was important though) but instead of listening; Peter is ignored. If this was a different kind of movie Peter literally could have died and itd be the fault of Happy and Tony like..... A large portion of conflict comes from characters being incompetent and not communicating and thats just poor storytelling.
Before this turns too much into an anti mcu rant id also like to say that the way they did Civil War was really dumb considering that Peter defects to Cap’s side in the comics, but whatever.
Also i loathe the way they handled the identity reveal at the end of Far From Home. With MCU movies most people know to expect an end credits scene by now, but typically that scene is not important to understand what’s happening in the films; they just aren’t important. Putting an identity reveal here makes it seem significantly less important than it is. On top of that i dislike their use of J Jonah Jameson for this scene.
JJJ is a character who has been repeatedly shown to have a genuinely good heart. All of his anger comes from a place of love for his city(he even says this hemself in the ps4 game when May writes in to tell him that he needs help). He hates Spider-Man because SM reminds him of the masked man who killed his wife; JJJ has never been able to get past that( and Peter’s antagonism of him definitely doesnt help) However, JJJ has been shown to care for people; he has a son who he often brags about, and one comic shows that JJJ is paying Peter for “amateur” quality photos because he knows that Peter is having a hard time and “just need some help”. JJJ has even learned Peter’s identity before and kept his secret for him(seriously though i cant remember the name of the comic but its defiantly worth the read), and in the original trilogy when Goblin threatens JJJ he claims that he doesn’t know who sends in the photos of Spidey because he does it via email( this is a lie). The MCU will have a very difficult time convincing me that JJJ would ever out a teenager’s identity and put him in danger like that. It goes too far against his character.(this could be hypocritical of me to say considering how i just insisted that multiple versions of a character can exist but whatever ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
This is accidentally turning into an MCU rant but id also like to say that i hate the lack of a TH!Spidey origin movie because it gives you no motivaion for Peter becoming SM or explanation of his powers; most people will know these things but if youre unfamiliar with the character its bound to be confusing(and im a sucker for origin movies)
#long post#spiderman#andrew garfield#The Amazing Spider Man#mcu crit#j jonah jameson#can you tell i care a lot?#cause i do#rant#ramble#this was not proofred#like at all#see theres a typo in that tag!#i would apologize but im not sorry
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Which other tcw Arc`s do u think are not in character (like the Clovis arc)?
Oh dear I think I’ve genuinely made y’all think I hate TCW or something.
Nah, look, it’s. The Clone Wars is one of my favorite cartoons of all time and always will be. The way it expanded the SW universe and the Prequel universe in particular was astounding and its complex ideas and mythology and worldbuilding and additions to the established story were wonderful. I adored the new characters it introduced me to.
MOST of the movie characters? I LOVED what they did with them. They didn’t really alter Obi Wan’s character that much at all besides making him way more of a hoe lol. I’d say my only OOC critique of him in the show is that they lean on him too much as the only moral compass character which means his characterization and motives have a tendency to slide around a bit for different episodes that need him to behave differently to do the “right thing” in that particular circumstance, if that makes sense. There IS one particular arc where I feel Obi Wan acts out of character quite often, but I’m saying right now that that leads into an argument I don’t want to get into so I’m not saying 😇
(Ik I ranted a bit about Pads in the last post too but overall I think she’s pretty alright in TCW too! I like her solo plots and her ones bonding with other characters!!!!)
But anon’s question was if I think any other arcs are OOC like the Clovis arc, I’m gonna say yes solely in regards to Anakin being OPC as for any other characters it’s not that big an issue save for the one unnamed Obi Wan offender. While I think Anakin has some individual moments where he’s OOC peppered throughout the series, I’d say the only two arcs that are particularly guilty offenders besides the Clovis arcs are the Deception arc and the Kadavo arc.
Now, the dichotomy of these two arcs is funny to me because the Kadavo arc is unfortunately my least favorite arc in the entire series while— and now THIS is an unpopular opinion —the Deception arc is one of my favorite arcs in the series because I am so SO here for the Obi Wqn character study it is; I think he’s totally in character for it and I love watching what they do with him in it.
However, where they go right with Obi Wan in this, they drop the ball with Anakin unfortunately. Like Anakin’s plot throughout the arc is.... gah, ok so. Ani boy vowing to hunt down and murder the guy who killed Obi Wan in vengeful rage is in character for him, it is, I get that. But the fact that that Vengeful Silent Broodish Rage is literally the only reaction we get out of Anakin the entire fucking arc???? Nah. NAH.
I’m sorry, but if there is ONE universal constant we’ve seen in the movies, it’s that Anakin Skywalker loses his entire shit if he’s faced with losing someone he cares about. We saw it with Shmi. We saw it with Padmé. We saw how emotional he got before he went into Murder Mode, he was kind of a wreck, he CRIED.
Now, TCW has a number one rule and it is that Anakin Cannot show any “girly” emotions whatsoever, ESPECIALLY none of the Dreaded Tears. So they just skip right over the messy emotions part and just have him be silent and cold and Angry. Full of brutish violent anger. Acceptable emotions for an Alpha Male to have. When OBI WAN died.
And I’m sorry, if your logic for Anakin’s muted reaction is just that he doesn’t care about Obi Wan as much as he does about Shmi or Padmé, I gotta STRONGLY disagree. It doesn’t matter if their relationship is viewed through a romantic lease or not, I will die on the hill that they were one of The Most important people in each other’s whole life and their relationship defines the whole prequel trilogy.
So yeah, no, Deception bugs me because they don’t let Anakin mourn Obi Wan at all, only get angry, like we don’t even get a freaking reaction to his death, we just get him yelling his name when Obes falls and his kinda confused-distressed face when he finds Ahsoka crying over the body (and SHE is allowed to cry..........) and then just a flash forward to his brooding sulk at the funeral.
Now, I’m not asking for much, I’m really not. I don’t need him uncontrollably sobbing at the funeral or anything (they already have Satine for that and no I will NOT rant right now about how taking a female character and bringing her back once briefly just to be a man’s Fragile Weeping Widow and then again to be his Helpless Damsel who you then fridge to make him sad is Not Good Writing I’m already writing a whole-ass spitefic about that 🙃🙃🙃)
But ughhhh they could have let Anakin have just a BIT of softness, of upset for losing his fucking best friend. Like, just save Ahsoka the additional teenage trauma and have Obi Wan die in Anakin’s arms instead, hype up them Qui Gon parallels! Give him just like a single fucking tear, just ONE for a moment! Like what y’all did with Rex, remember? He’s still Manly(TM) for crying!!!!!! Maybe make Satine not be the only overly emotional person at the funeral and then afterwards have her and Anakin have a convo where he accuses her of not caring and we can see how she, unlike Anakin, knows how to let those she loves go.
So gah yeah Deception is OOC for Anakin because he doesn’t get to show emotions, and Kadavo...... ugh, so many other people have written very detailed pieces that summarize basically my exact opinions on why I don’t like the arc, but I think a huge part of that is how they downplay Anakin’s trauma as a past slave in favor of, once again, brash, cocky toxic masculinity.
Anakin the former slave would NOT be so easily comfortable and all jokey jokey with letting the sixteen year old in his care pretend to be sold into slavery and he definitely wouldn’t be cracking jokes about how he makes a better slave master. Like I mentioned before, he would Not be able to keep his cool around the slaver Queen so easily. He wouldn’t. This isn’t even just a question of whether his newfound flirting abilities are valid because I actually think they are so long as he doesn’t feel attraction himself, but the pure rage at her being a slaver who sees him as a sex slave would at Most mean he’d be able to barely be restricting himself from murdering her. He would not be that good at it with her specifically
And tbh I do think this arc has several issues so I don’t even quite know how I’d fix it. I know how I’d fix certain issues, but def not all of them.
So yeah agh, Anakin OOC in Deception and Kadavo, other characters are usually p fine. Clone Wars Good Show!!!!
#thanks for asking me i love answering these!#ask#anon#morai musings#sw the clone wars#one (1) hot mess#star wars#the clone wars#anakin skywalker
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secret for a secret (or why jj doesn’t like seeing kie kiss other boys)
word count: 1,779
cw: mentions of racism, homophobia, and abuse
summery: jj doesn’t want to go home. kie wasn’t invited to sarah’s birthday. when the two of them commiserate at john b’s, two major secrets come to life. (this is a sucky description i’m sorry pls just read it.)
ships: like bromance jj x kie?
disclaimer: a lot of this content is based off two of my friends’ experiences at this country club near us. yeet.
*****
John B and his dad were off the island, searching for the Royal Mariner. Which meant that no one was home. And that’s just what JJ needed.
It hurt his lungs to try and inhale as his bike sped down the road, but he’d checked. Nothing was broken. He just needed to sleep off the pain on John B’s pullout coach.
That’s what he always did, but he never told John B why. He always had various excuses to employ about Kooks or bike accidents or a mixture of the two, but today he didn’t need one.
He hopped off his bike and started wheeling it up the walk towards the house. Then, he saw her.
They hadn’t talked since late August, and she’d gone full Kook in the meantime, but he’d recognize Kie anywhere. The last few times he’d seen her at keggers, her hair had been straightened just like all the girls she hung with; now it was up in a high messy bun. She looked like his Kie.
He thought about leaving her there, but his ribs hurt and he could already feel his cheek swelling. It was getting darker by the minute. So, he dropped his bike against the side of the house and headed up to the porch.
Kie flinched when the door hit the frame, but she didn’t look up. JJ planned to just move past her, but he realized that her feet were plainly resting on the mat that hid the spare key.
JJ cleared his throat. Nothing. “Hey,” He said awkwardly.
Finally, she looked up. “JJ.” She didn’t sound surprised: in fact, she said it like it was just a fact. “Are you meeting John B?”
She was so far off the radar that she didn’t even know they were gone. “He’s not home.”
“Then why are you here?”
“Why are you?”
Kie looked back down, and didn’t answer. He could’ve just grabbed the key and left her like that. But once upon a time, Kie was his everything: his best friend, his first kiss, his favorite person. He couldn’t leave her like this, even if she left him.
He settled down across from her. “What’s wrong, Kie?”
She laughed lightly. “No one’s called me that in awhile.” Then she glanced up. “What happened to your face?”
“Topper,” JJ replied smoothly, eyes on hers.
“You’re a good liar, J.”
“Maybe because I’m telling the truth?” She tucked a stray bang behind her hair, and didn’t say anything. JJ had the overwhelming feeling that she wasn’t really there on the porch with her. “Penny for your thoughts?”
“How about a secret for a secret?”
It was an old Pogue game, older than his friendship with her. John B started it and Pope instituted the rules and then Kie made them play it all the time when they first met. That’s how he got to know her. The old her. New Kie was different. And so that’s why he said, “Okay.”
“Who gave you the bruises?”
“My dad.” JJ said it just as he’d named Topper, all cool and collected. His brain felt a bit numb from it.
“Fuck.”
“It’s always him. Almost always.” The look on Kie’s face made him back pedal. He didn’t want her pity, he just wanted to say it. So he lied. “It’s never a big deal, just a slap or something.”
“J, that is a big deal. You need to tell someone—“
“And get put in the foster care on the mainland? Fuck that. At least here I have you guys.” He said it without thinking, because, until recently, “you guys” had included her. Maybe it still did.
“JJ, you deserve to be safe. And happy. With a family that loves you.”
“I am, most of the time.” JJ grinned. “Now, you’re turn.” He slid across the space between them, coming to join her on the couch. As he sat, he forced himself not to wince at the pain in his stomach. Maybe he needed to check again for broken ribs, but he couldn’t with Kie there. He didn’t want to scare her.
“Alright, ask away.”
“Why are you here?”
She glanced at him, then leaned back on the couch. “Sarah’s birthday party is tonight, and I wasn’t invited.”
“That’s it?”
She crossed her arms. “What do you mean, ‘that’s it’?”
“It’s a birthday party, Kie.”
“She’s my best friend.”
“I used to say that about you, you know.”
She frowned, and leaned forward again. Her arms rested on her knees, her eyes studied the floorboards. “Last week was her birthday, technically, so we went to the beach.” Maybe it was the pain in her voice, or the way she exhaled before she said it, but JJ could tell that this right here was the real reason. “It was just the two of us, ya know? It was stormy, so everyone was gone, and we didn’t even bring our boards. We just talked.
“And we got to talking about boys and she kept talking about how she hates them. And how they all suck.”
“Ouch.”
“I said I thought it was annoying that boys always roughhouse each other for no reason. And she tackled me. She was on top of my, kneeling over me. Right up in my face.”
“I’m lost.“
“We kissed.” Her voice was small, scared. JJ stared at her. “I kissed her, I guess. And I realized I wanted to. I really, really wanted to.”
JJ didn’t say anything for a long time. Finally, he said, “So that’s why you won’t go out with me.”
She laughed quietly. “Something like that.”
“God, I told John B it wasn’t me. He’s gonna freak when he finds out.” A look of horror crossed Kie’s face.
“No.”
“In a good way.”
“JJ, you can’t tell him. No one can know.”
“What?”
“If my parents find out... If anyone finds out...”
JJ’s brows furrowed. He didn’t get it. It wasn’t like she had his dad. Hell, her parents were liberal. Her mom had photos from pride marches in her youth. “Kie, your parents won’t care.”
“My dad’s the only black man at the country club, did you know that?” She said suddenly. “I mean, there’s Kelce too, but his parents adopted him. They’re doctors. But my dad owns a restaurant. And my dad’s married to a white girl. We get looks at the club every time we’re there together.”
“Kie.”
“Imagine if everyone knew. Imagine the looks they’d give us then. In their eyes, it’s bad enough I’m not a pretty, smiley blonde. But if they knew I kissed her... If they knew that I’m...”
“Gay.”
She nodded. “They’d riot.”
“But that doesn’t mean you can’t tell your parents.”
“My parents always tell me to be proud of who I am, as if that does anything. If they knew I was pretending to be something I’m not for them?”
JJ realized, suddenly, that Kie was crying. And then he realized that he’d only seen her cry once before, when her grandma died in sixth grade. He awkwardly rested his arm around her.
“Promise me you won’t tell?”
“If you keep my secret, I’ll keep yours.”
“Deal.” She rested against him, her eyes closed just slightly. JJ smiled.
“I have one more condition: you come back to the dark side.”
“Fuck the Kooks,” She whispered lazily.
“Fuck the Kooks.”
They sat like that for awhile, arms wrapped around each other, until the sun had gone down completely and they’d retreated into John B’s house.
As Kie fussed around the kitchen, using the little food they had to produce something of substance, JJ leaned against the counter and stared out the window.
“What if we convince John B you’re into him?”
She looked up from the pot she was currently stirring, which smelled entirely too good to come from the Routledge house.
“I’m sorry?”
“It’s the perfect cover. You like John B but you can’t get with him because rules.”
“Why John B?”
“Because he’s an easy target. Sure, he’d be into it, but it’s not like he’s gonna get attached. Pope’s the best of us. Hell, if he falls for you and you pretend to be into it? Game over. But John B’ll just move on.”
“What about you?”
He flexed his arms. “I will never be tied down, Kie.” She rolled her eyes and looked away from him, so he slid to the counter next to the stove. “And I couldn’t with good conscience pretend I like you.”
“Try this,” She held out her spoon for him, and he took a bite. “So, what are you gonna say to him?”
“We’ll hype him up slowly. Just get comfy, ya know? Act like a girl.”
“What does that even mean?”
“I don’t know, just, like, hug him and stuff. Maybe kiss him on the cheek, ruffle his hair. Isn’t that a thing you guys do?”
She elbowed him. “If I’m supposed to come back to you guys, then you can at least drop the toxic masculinity stuff.” JJ grinned. “What’d you think?” Kiara gestured with the wooden spoon, drawing his attention back to the pot.
“Little hot, but hell of a lot better than anything I’ve ever eaten.”
“Except my dad’s surf and turf special?”
“You don’t eat the surf and turf special, Kie.” Hands raised like a preacher, he paused for dramatic effect. “You experience it.”
“That might just be the worst thing you’ve ever said.” She pulled the pot from the stove, and grabbed two bowls from the cabinet. The way she moved around the kitchen reminded JJ that once upon a time, this was a normal night: Kie would make dinner, Pope would work on homework at the counter, JJ and John B would dance around the kitchen to bad country music. He wanted that back so desperately.
“You think we can do this more often?” He asked, as she spooned the thick liquid out. “Bring back Friday night dinners?”
Kie handed him a small metal spoon and a bowl. “If John B ever gets his ass out grocery shopping, sure.”
“And we’ll watch the full original trilogy?”
“If you agree to a John Hughes movie marathon after that.”
“Heathers, too?”
“Sure.”
Kiara started to eat, but JJ just pushed his around with his spoon for a bit. Finally, he said, “Kie?”
“Mmm hmm?”
“I can still flirt with you, right?”
“Eat your dinner.”
#obx#obx netflix#outerbanks#jj maybank#obx jj#jj outer banks#kiara carrera#kie#kiara outer banks#kiara#obx kiara#sarah cameron#jj x kie#outer banks
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What’s your feelings on godot i do feel sorry for him and i don’t hate him but he was a huge prick to Phoenix
Godot is a rather complex character. I like him as a character in general, however the fandom does seem to misunderstand who he is and what his motives are, even his fans.
When we first meet Godot chronologically, we meet him as the defense lawyer, Diego Armando. Diego is honestly pretty charming, he’s smooth, he’s confident, he’s cool, and I like the way he plays off of Mia. I personally never found the “kitten” nickname sexist nor do I understand why it would even be considered that way. It’s never said once that Diego doesn’t think Mia is lesser for her gender. In fact, in their first conversation during the case, this is said:
Armando:No, no, no… You’ve got it all wrong! Today, YOU’RE the finest! After all, it took an amazing amount of guts to take this case! Imagine… An escaped death row convict for a first client!
If anything, I think the whole kitten thing is probably just his nickname for rookies in general, and not necessarily women. I’ve seen people think it’s his way of flirting with her, and that’s possible too, just not necessarily how I see it. Anyways, at the end of the case, Mia beats herself up because she thinks that she was the reason her client died and Diego gives her this piece of advice:
Armando:Don’t you get it? You can’t cry yet. The only time a lawyer can cry is when it’s all over.
Mia:M-Mr. Armando…
It’s honestly a good piece of advice, and I love how Mia takes inspiration from that quote and uses it towards Phoenix even if it’s said in a different way:
“The toughest of times are when lawyers have to put on their biggest smiles.”
It’s not exactly the same as what Diego said, sure, but it does have the same meaning. In that way at least, you can see the impact he must have left on Mia. Regarding the two’s relationship for a moment, I do think they had just started dating when Diego was poisoned. It does explain why Grossberg calls Diego Mia’s boyfriend, but I digress.
When we meet him in 3-2 and 3-3, it’s obvious he dislikes Phoenix but we don’t know why yet. Honestly, Godot is probably one of my favorite parts of 3-2: he’s mysterious and confident, but he also has some goofy moments like when he refers to himself as a legendary prosecutor because he’s never lost a case but he’s also never won one either. I don’t know that it was intended to be funny but it’s always made me snicker a little. He comes off as being a jerk sure but so did Edgeworth and Franziska, and like them, we learn more about Godot and his motivations later on.
Godot in 3-3 is why I can never agree that T&T has a filler case. For one, in 3-3, you learn about Godot’s inability to see red on white when he fails to notice the ketchup on Maggey’s apron. It’s an extremely subtle moment, but it’s given quite a bit of focus so the player could then assume that that unique feature will be important later on. Godot is still mysterious and a jerk but I love the way that he handles Furio and willingly admits to being the one who summoned him to court. Like Nick said after the fact:
(T… Too cool…)
Not only that, but he does manage to have a somewhat nice moment with Phoenix at the end of the case after throwing coffee at him:
Godot:Well done… Trite. I saved my 17th cup of coffee just for you. Savor it… While you watch your caged prey.
While we don’t learn that much more about Godot than we did in 3-2; what we do learn about him plays a very important role in a case later on. 3-3 isn’t directly involved with the Feys at all, but it does have some importance to the overall plot of the game.
We meet Armando in 3-4 which is the first playable case chronologically in the trilogy’s timeline. Right off the bat, we notice he looks similar to Godot, the two even have a similar suit to each other, just different colors and have a similar hairstyle. I’m not entirely sure how many people guessed that Godot and Diego Armando were the same person right away but I think people might have at least thought the two were related at least (I’ve even seen people think that Godot and Diego were identical twins!). As for me, I kinda had a feeling since the two look alike and have the same love for the hot, bitter lady known as coffee.
Godot is extremely important to 3-5. If it wasn’t for him forming a plan to save Maya with Misty and Iris, Maya would be dead. Thing is, I don’t agree that Godot is entirely to blame for not going to the police and bringing the plot to them or just burning the note the whole way through. If the latter had happened, Pearl would have told Morgan she couldn’t find it and Morgan would definitely suspect that something was going on and possibly even relay the plan to Pearl herself. The former happening is unlikely because of reasons that I will go into a bit deeper. Another problem lies in that Misty also shares some of the blame herself but this post isn’t about her so I won’t go deep into it.
We don’t see Godot until the second investigation period when Dusky Bridge has been rebuilt and Phoenix enters the Inner Temple, desperate to find Maya. It’s there that we learn why Godot hates Phoenix so much. Godot blames Phoenix for the murder of Mia Fey. He states that since Phoenix was there at the time, he should have protected her and by failing to do so, he in a sense, killed her. And because Maya is missing at the time, he goes further and says that Phoenix killed Maya indirectly by failing to protect her when she needed it most.
Personally, I find this conversation to be more Godot venting out his frustrations on Phoenix. Think about it, the guy spent 5 years in a coma because a psycho killer poisoned his coffee. He wakes up and he finds out that his girlfriend was murdered while he was in a coma. He feels mad at himself for not being able to protect Mia and thus sought to protect Maya as a way to make amends. While it seems like a weird conversation and just another example of Godot being a douche during one’s first time going through the case; a replay of the case after finishing it helps shed new light on the conversation the two have.
We also learn more about Godot’s inability to see red on white during that same encounter in greater detail. He says that his eyes are messed up and that mask is the only way he can see. Although it’s not much, it is something.
During the first trial portion of the last trial day, Godot starts acting rather strangely. When he learns that there was writing in red on the stone lantern in the Inner Temple Garden, he starts freaking out. Not only that but he actually helps calm Phoenix down when he freaks out over Dahlia’s suggestion that Maya jumped into the Eagle River from the Inner Temple side, and tells him that would be impossible to do.
Eventually, after Dahlia has been exorcised from Maya’s body, the Judge attempts to hand down his verdict. Godot immediately objects and says that they still don’t know who killed Misty, and the only person who can testify about that is Maya Fey. Some people have called this move callous and insensitive to the state that Maya is in, but it really isn’t. Godot could have simply let the Judge hand his verdict down and get away with his crime. But he doesn’t, he requests that they summon the one person that could incriminate him. Also, he does show a fair bit of empathy towards Maya in this exchange of dialogue towards her before her first testimony:
Godot:Straighten up this moment, young lady!
Maya:Huh…?
Godot:Pick your head up and speak clearly. There’s always time for crying later.
Maya:B-But I…
Godot:Your mother was killed right in front of your eyes! There’s nothing you can do to change that fact.
Maya:…!
Godot:But there’s something you can do… You can finish this. You’ve been watching the whole thing right? You’ve seen the witnesses come out and you’ve seen us squeeze the truth out of them. Now it’s your turn. …Let’s hear your testimony. On the night of the crime… what exactly did you see happen!?
It’s pretty obvious during Maya’s testimony that she’s willing to protect the identity of whoever killed her mother, even to the point that she begs Phoenix not to reveal his identity and even suggests that she thought it was a man for other reasons than the three red glowing lights. We also get to hear about this one cute little story about an interaction between him and Pearl in which he actually comforted her and gave her coffee. That’s pretty sweet…and kinda dangerous.
Still, it’s quite obvious upon cross-examining Maya that Godot is the killer, so why is she covering up for the man who killed her mother to the point that she’d be found guilty otherwise? Godot did save Maya’s life in the process of killing Misty who was channeling Dahlia at the time and would have killed her if Godot hadn’t intervened. Maya is plenty aware of this and it is in character for her to do something like that.
We also learn through Godot’s self-reflection that he knows that he could have killed Pearl instead of Misty that night and that Misty’s murder was out of a fit of rage against the ghost of the woman who ruined his life. He also goes on to say that he’s not really sure that him saving Maya’s life was out of a genuine will to protect her, and even tells her that if he genuinely wanted to help Maya, he should have gone to Phoenix instead. Despite this, Maya genuinely believes that he wanted to save her life and so does Phoenix even despite the way Godot had treated him up to that point.
Godot is an extremely gray character and it’s really interesting to study him as a character, who he is and what his intentions were. I don’t think he truthfully wanted to kill anyone that night in the Inner Temple Garden, all he wanted to do was protect Maya the way he wanted to protect Mia. He was never willing to actually kill anybody and even helped Phoenix catch him in the end. Iris and Misty both played a role in this plan too and made their own share of screw-ups so I don’t understand why people shift so much of the blame for it onto Godot?
Honestly though, I think that the whole black-white morality lens that people typically view characters through doesn’t really work with characters like Godot. Godot is not a good guy but he’s not a cookie cutter bad guy like some of the culprits in this series seem to be and that’s what makes him so intriguing to me. He’s not my favorite character, but I can see why someone may say he’s their favorite.
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Made a tier list of FNaF media!!! Not counting the activity book or the security survival log because those don’t really add anything, they’re just neat activities or summaries of game info
I explained the choices under the cut, equal parts personal bias and objective opinion, so if you think differently then hey, good on ya!
Going down to up XD
F
The Silver Eyes Graphic Novel: Do I even need to explain this one? Rushed art with countless mistakes, horrid coloring, samey designs, the important scenes come off as bland and even goofy instead of impactful. It’s clear Pinky wasn’t used to drawing humans, the colorist had no idea what they were doing, and no one on the team made a graphic novel before. It’s laughable how bad this was XD
E
The Fourth Closet: Does anyone really know what happened at the end? I... really don’t like what they did with Charlie in this one. I don’t like how William was able to get out of his Springtrap- it was SUPPOSED to trap him, and yet he just... is out of it... I think the whole thing with Baby being like this hot clown girl instead of what she is in Sister Location is very... ... it exists... Tbh I respect the bold direction it took, but I honestly felt it was too much of a stretch and just didn’t work.
D
FNaF AR, Special Delivery: Not bad! The character models and voice acting is where the game shines most. Other than that, there isn’t really much substantial to the game other than some lore with Vanny/Ness and Luis. The gameplay can get frustrating sometimes(I cant collect remnant, read my mail, or even work on my own animatronics without DING DONG SOMEONES HERE every 5 seconds), and all you do is spin in a circle until you get glitchy, look away if they get glitchy, or zap them when they run at you. Some people probably love this game and good on them for that, but I find myself not touching it for weeks at a time.
Freddy In Space 2: GREAT game for charity, great art, great music! ... That’s all it has going for it, though. It was clear that this was a quickly made game designed to be beaten in one sitting, and it did exactly what it needed to do! Other than being amazing how it was for charity, the game doesn’t have that much going for it(except introducing Lolzhax aka BEST ROBO), so overall not bad but also did almost nothing outside of being for the Charity Livestream XD
Fazbear Frights, Into The Pit: Again, not bad! A nice collection of short stories, almost like goofy campfire horror you’d tell to kids... like goosebumps! I felt each story was REALLY lacking in some areas, but I liked the general idea they were going for. That being said, they’re moreso neat scary stories with the name FNaF attached than anything else(except maybe the first of the three). It hints that they have an overarching plot that will be covered in future books, but as of right now, I feel no one’s missing out by not reading them.
C
FNaF 3: A satisfying end to the original trilogy story! Purple Guy gets justice, everything gets tied together with a neat bow, and the first arc in the series comes to an end. Also Springtrap, aka my favorite. This game is riddled with neat 8-bit minigames and bits of lore, but the gameplay itself is where I find it not as good as the S A and B tiers. The new setup with the system reboots are def really interesting, but other than that, each night is just... the same thing but harder. Most other games introduce different characters on different difficulties per night, but since Springtrap is the only deadly one, it’s just... him more aggressive each night and systems failing more often. Makes the gameplay pretty repetitive and frustrating after Night 3 or so.
FNaF 4: The beginning of what I like to call the Afton saga(4, SL, FFPS, UCN)! This is when the lore began to get REALLY good... and also really confusing. Props for it taking such a bold direction by taking place in a child’s bedroom instead of in an office with cameras, its a neat change of pace! That being said, the gameplay can get frustrating and there’s a high learning curve for needing to listen to each sound the anmatronics make. Also lore wise... there really isn’t much! Just mainly focuses on what happened to this poor kid. Also the box still being a loose end... yeah.
The Twisted Ones: I enjoyed this one! It had a very interesting direction that kinda kept me guessing on what was going on, and this is when Scott really started nailing in the foreshadowing for the reveal in TFC. The Twisted animatronics are SO cool, and the introduction of those little alteration chips provided new context to games like 4 and SL! That being said, I don’t remember it being... that memorable? I also didn’t like how Charlie’s and John’s relationship was... so awkward... It was neat, but honestly nothing to really go crazy over, in my opinion.
B
The Silver Eyes: Honestly, I adored this book when I read it back in 2016, before Sister Location happened. At the time I wasn’t trying to connect it to any lore, so it was really great just to see a sort of retelling of the FNaF story. A lot of people complained about how long it was... I might agree if I reread it but tbh it never bothered me before. It was delightfully creepy, yet had a simple plot and wasn’t NEARLY as out there as TTO and TFC. Especially TFC. I felt this book didnt need 2 sequels and would’ve been just fine on its own, but whatcha gonna do. Carlton is forever my fav, and it’s the first time we really learn about Henry AND it was the first time we got a name for our Purple Guy: William Afton!
Sister Location: I like this one for just how bold of a game it was. I’m also including SL’s Custom Night wrapped into this package. Jam packed with lore, our first (main) game with VOICE ACTING, and honestly the humor has no right being as good as it is. I love how this not only expanded on the crying child from 4′s story, but also gives us so much Elizabeth and Michael content. The gameplay has a lot of unbalanced features and feels a little too over the place at times, but I appreciate where it was going with it!
FNaF World: ... This one is pure personal bias. A lot of people don’t like it. I adore it. Honestly I love the cute overworld, I love beating up enemies as my favorite animatronics, I love the horror, nihilism, and lore shoved into this game alongside SO MUCH humor. Update 2 was nothing short of an absolute delight and... wait, no!!! FNaF World had our first voice acting!!! So many endings and nods to other games Scott’s made, a cool scene with Desk Man/Henry and Baby, just... muah. Good content. Also Scott 57 <3
A
Ultimate Custom Night: Name a better way to end the Afton Saga, I’ll wait. It’s so obvious how much time, thought, and care went into this one. I love how the game rewards you with funny cutscenes the higher scores you get, and I just! So much voice acting! I love how each preset- no, each character has their own moves so every time you do a certain mode, you need to learn to manage them all and get a good strategy. I like how it’s way more strategy and skill than the RNG that many previous games had. Also, Scott!!! You managed to put this into the LORE by making it William’s hell, MUAH, couldnt have done it better!!!
FNaF 2: This one might have bias for being the peak of the fandom, but it was one of the greatest times to be in that fandom. Freaking out over the trailers, theories galore, prequel vs sequel, and just... so good. 1 didn’t have much plot, 2 DID. 2 had more mechanics and strategy to it than 1, and gave us over twice as many characters! We finally got a “face” to our killer, Mr. Purple Man, and how could I ever complain about more Phone Guy~? This one also introduced the 8-bit minigames, which became a HUGE staple for the series! Perfect expansion of the first!
Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria Simulator: The PERFECT blend of old and new gameplay. The salvage scenes are intense, the nights had a great balancing mechanic of juggling doing tasks while also avoiding animatronics, multiple endings, and a neat tycoon segment to give the player a breather... but with LORE!!! Midnight Motorist is easily one of the best tracks in the series. Also has a GREAT canonical ending, when(with paired with UCN), ties the plots of 1-6 SO nicely with a neat bow.
S
FNaF 1: Okay. From a personal and gameplay standpoint, I was going to put this much lower. Like B or C. That being said... this has to go in S. Yes, it has the least lore and arguably the worst gameplay(too much RNG for 4/20 mode), but this was the game. I can’t even exaggerate when I say just how much FNaF changed not only the gaming community, but especially the horror and indie communities. So many names got big from this: Markiplier, Dawko, Game Theory, The Living Tombstone, DA Games, SCOTT HIMSELF, just to name a few!!! And to think, this was originally going to be Scott’s last game! FNaF changed gaming HISTORY, and I think that alone makes this title deserving of S.
FNaF VR, Help Wanted: Okay, personal bias time, but I truly think VR deserves this S. Seeing Glitchtrap for the first time incited a panic in me that I hadn’t felt since FNaF 1 and 2. You get FNaF 1-4 in one, all in VR, WONDERFUL character models that you can WATCH MOVE!!! SO many minigames and fun challenges to play, so many neat knickknacks to collect, the Halloween update is FANTASTIC. The introduction of some great characters, such as: Glitchtrap, Vanny, Tape Girl, Dreadbear, Grim Foxy, etc!!! There’s also just- something so nice about being able to see every office and the pizzeria in 3D spaces where you can look around! Just from a gameplay and environment standpoint, this was an AMAZING addition and deserves the S.
... Thanks for listening to me ramble XD If you disagree... then good for you! I won’t fight anyone on this, I’m aware that this is a lot of personal bias. But if you made it this far... thanks for hearing me ramble!!!!
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hey, so i thought maybe you could tell us a little what you're currently interested in? ♥ like, what have you been doing during quarantine, are there any new shows you watched that you enjoyed a lot, did you maybe take up a new hobby or something? :)
Hello!! I did not forget this lovely message, I was just in no state to answer (who’d have thought that recovery from surgery is, y’know, taxing) BUT I’M BACK NOW and ohhhh do you know what you’ve unlocked by asking me this question...?? I cannot give you a comprehensive list but I can tell you a couple of the things that I got into during quarantine, and the things I am currently super passionate about! My memory is, uh, not great but thankfully I do journal and write down things so I am confident I can answer this for you :D (plus I do always love recommending things so - aaa??? Thank you for this ask????)
Putting things under a cut because I physically cannot chill but if tl;dr I want you to take away one thing from this it’s that everyone should read Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir. Thoughts below.
(Also. I would love to go off about my interests more on here but am not sure what... shape that should ideally take? Text posts? IDK pls give me suggestions, help me out?? dfhasjkldf)
Movies
I have not seen many, but I can and will scream about The Old Guard over and over because... it was everything I never knew I needed in an action movie?? I don’t reblog many things about it anymore but I love love LOVED it!!
Also, upon recommendation by one of my friends from India, I have been delving into the world of Bollywood movies and WOW Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara was so fucking good??? idk if it’s on Netflix in every country but it is in mine and I highly recommend it. It’s thoughtful, honest, emotional and shot absolutely gorgeously, and it also has that cheesiness that is just... so good... sometimes you just need the cheese y’know???
(Side note, 2020 was the year I saw Pride and Prejudice (2005) for the first time and I am a changed woman. It is now my ultimate comfort movie. Please see it if you have not, I cannot believe it took me this long. I saw it for the first time on an airplane (in january... a lifetime ago) and have seen it many, many times since.)
TV Shows
So, to everyone’s shock but especially my own, I have not really been into TV lately? I watched The Boys because my brother recommended it (it’s good, but gorey and pulls no punches, the R rating is deserved), and recently started watching Jujutsu Kaisen because my sister recommended it (I haven’t watched a new anime in like a year which is kinda wild to me? But I am enjoying this one - the opening SLAPS and what I’ve seen so far has been fun! Plus I’m watching it with my sister and I like sending her reactions xD),,, and that’s pretty much it for this category?? I am aware there is a LOT of good shit out there I just.. .don’t seem to have the attention span for multiple episodes of a Thing these days. Meh. I’m sure it’ll come back to me eventually ^^
Musical Theater
One of the main reasons I think I haven’t been big into TV is because my Musical Passion is in FULL SWING (haha get it). Probably because the only thing that has remained for me during this quarantine is my singing lessons (and lemme tell you... over skype, that shit is ROUGH but still better than not singing at all) and I have been obsessing over learning new songs and finding shows through recommendations and compilation videos on youtube... So.
Shows I listen to a lot these days include Starry, Anastasia, The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals, Come From Away (I made a post recently specifically about musicals, you should be able to find it under #French speaks) - specific songs in my range that I am currently learning and obsessing over include “Bring on the men” from Jekyll and Hyde, “The Mad Hatter” from Wonderland, “Show Yourself” from Frozen 2 (I liked it ok I DID), and “Go Tonight” from The Mad Ones (this one makes me cry... I’m making my sister duet it with me bc I can’t stop thinking about it).
Also, if you’re interested in hearing me sing things, head over to my instagram where I post covers (and also art)!!
(Musical people, I am curious to hear opinions about Great Comet, and also The Count of Monte Cristo - two shows I’ve been meaning to check out!)
Video Games
Listen. Animal Crossing New Horizons is awesome and I’m glad I have it (...give me Brewster back, Nintendo, or I WILL RIOT), but I have been branching out into other games for the Switch (might as well make this purchase worth it amirite) - current faves include Celeste (which is SO HARD but also SO FUCKING FUN) and Spiritfarer which I specifically bought to play at the hospital bc I knew I was going to be there for a few days, and let me tell you - best decision of 2020. Please watch the trailer if you haven’t heard of it, it’s GORGEOUS and beautiful and emotional and I loved every second of it. Both of these can also be purchased for PC and I think they are definitely worth the investment!!
In other news I’m back on my Stardew Valley bullshit. It’s just so calming.I revisit it a lot lmao
Books
So... I have been reading. A LOT. I read over 70 books this year, which for me is... average tbh? I have had some less productive reading months but overall I have torn through stuff and BOY do I have recommendations if you want them?? For the sake of brevity I will only mention a few here:
Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir “Lesbian necromancers explore a haunted gothic palace in space”. That is all. This was my first five star fiction book of the year and I will never be done screaming about it. There is a dedicated but smallish fandom here on tumblr and it deserves SO MUCH MORE. Please, please please. Everyone should read this damn book. It’s confusing in the beginning but I promise it’s worth it IT’S SO GOOD!! And also the sequel is out and it’s also confusing and SO GOOD!!!
Educated by Tara Westover. This is an autobiography and it’s one of those books that like. Stick in your mind for months after you’ve read it. It’s about how this woman escaped an abusive household that was religiously oppressive and also like... survivalist (prepping for the apocalypse) and avidly believed in conspiracy theories - by educating herself, working her way up to going to Harvard. Nothing I say could do the emotional impact of this book justice - and also just, the perspective this book gave me?? Incredible. Education is the most powerful tool and this woman grabbed it by the hair and did not let go and I was FLOORED. Everyone should read this. I don’t even usually read biographies but DAMN.
The Winternight trilogy by Katherine Arden.(Book 1 is called The Bear and the Nightingale). This is a bit of a slow burn type deal - it’s a retelling of a Russian fairy tale (I think?? Or like a folk... story? Something like that) and it is just. So magical. It’s not fast paced but it works up to FANTASTIC moments, the focus is on family and magic and change and “making your own way” and all three of these books were wonderful. It reminded me of Naomi Novic’s Uprooted and Spinning Silver (both of which I also loved back in 2019 and would highly recommend) and they are PERFECT winter reads if you’re looking for something to get cozy with. I liked book 1 well enough but books 2 and 3 knocked it out of the park. Fantastic. Loved them.
I have many more recs but this will do for now hahah
Music
Gonna keep this brief too - my music taste is all over the place, but here are some songs I have been obsessed with recently!! Beware of genre whiplash though because these are Very Different from one another (and different from the musical theater stuff above)
Factories - Autoheart (that bridge gets me every time, idk why. This is one I could have on repeat for hours and not get tired of it either. Something about it just gets me!!)
History Read - The Altogether (The lyrics!! Tbh the entire Silo album is GREAT, but this one is my fave. Their music is so... mellow, in the best way??)
Weather Man - Valley of Wolves (ok this one is just a banger. I’m a sucker for a good sing-along-able hook (that’s not a word. you get me though right) and this fucking DELIVERS. I also just think “I make these dark skies blue, I make these mountains move, let the rain come down, I’m pushing through.... [pause] ... ‘cause I’m the weather man” is such good execution of a concept?? That PAUSE GETS ME it’s just SO FUN?!?! idk man I like a good upbeat banger and this is that.)
I believe (get over yourself) - Nico Vega (this one is just a callout at myself tbh?? “you’re a fool” I AM and I needed to hear it?? It’s also SO FUN to sing!!! We love a banger.)
Kiss me you animal - Burn the Ballroom (mentioning this mainly because it reminded me, lyrically, of Gideon the Ninth and I need someone to confirm this for me before I go insane?? “everybody knows that home is where your teeth sink, love” - I mean c’mon??? Also it’s a banger. I do like some rock from time to time... and this also has a killer driving bassline. This is super fun to drive to, too!!)
((If we have overlap and anyone wants to exchange playlists with me - I am SO here for it. Always looking for new music!!! I mean it!!))
Youtube
Last and certainly not least... meet my newest hyperfixation!!! I have always loved watching video essays, and booktube videos, and arttube videos - and my current niche of favorite creators is the Polygon video team!! They made videos about video games and board games and anything gaming-related and I just. I’m only peripherally a “gamer(TM)” but I love anything and everything they create. (Also you don’t have to know much about video games to enjoy all of their content!! A lot of it is still accessible to Non-Gamers(TM) or casual gamers!)
BDG is my new favorite creator, the Unraveled series he does on the channel is a work of genius - but I have also started watching their streams and older series and I am enjoying myself SO MUCH! I love boardgames so their series on them, Overboard, is so fun and entertaining (and I already know a bunch of games I want to buy based on seeing the gameplay), and it also made me invested in the other creators - particularly Simone, I would die for Simone?? And Pat? And Jenna? They each have their niche and they work really well together too and their videos are my Main Serotonin Machine in these trying times(TM), thank you for coming to my TED talk.
Also. If you’re already following me here and you are familiar with Polygon things I BEG YOU TO COME AND TALK TO ME ABOUT THEM because I am like, bursting, but I also don’t want to flood my dash with stuff that 99% of my followers are unfamiliar with y’know??
...I think I’m going to leave it at this - it’s already a lot!
But thank you once again for asking and for letting me Go Off about things I am interested in!! I just... I very often wish I could do this more, but I’m not sure how to go about it? Should I just do text posts about things?? Would that be interesting to anyone?? Or is that like, annoying? Should I start a review blog or something? dhfajkldhf I just want to talk about things that excite me, but whenever I’m here I often just stick to reblogging other people’s stuff... help?? What do y’all want to see??
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