#gods it's like fucking whack-a-mole
Text
listen I know Heathens/Asatruar/Lokeans have to deal with all the Marvel stuff and sure that's annoying but tbh they get it light compared to what Hellenics have to go through every time some new media involving ancient Greece comes out
#gods it's like fucking whack-a-mole#every time something relating to ancient Greece comes out we get shat on#BLAH BLAH BLAH THE WOKE MEDIA IS TURNING ANCIENT HEROES/KINGS GAY#BY THE WAY YOU LIKE TALKING ABOUT THESE FIGURES? DID YOU KNOW THEY'RE NOT REAL YOU FUCKING IDIOT?#modern-day Greeks weren't even allowed to worship their gods until 2006#and it took until 2017 until it became a recognized religion#AS people in Greece were fighting for their own religious freedom Rick Riordan was going off publicly about how weird and crazy they were#WHILE PROFITING OFF OF THAT VERY RELIGION IN HIS BOOK SERIES#while he's since apologized on twitter his website STILL makes sure to point out that the Theoi are inferior to G-d
0 notes
Text
i cant believe im sick again this is ridiculous
#i was just starting to feel better after a week in bed#spent 2 days traveling#and bam#coming down with something again#what am i even wearing a mask for#god fuck me#honestly idk how many more setbacks i can handle#ever since i broke my shoulder#idk it feels like#ive just been treading water#trying to catch up#but im not getting anywhere#its just one curveball after another#like playing whack a mole#always putting out fires#<- and atruggling to find the right metaphor lmfaoo#and beyond that zero chance to focus on the important thing (writing this fucking thesis)#i dont even have anything to look forward to#thats the problem innit#right now my life sucks#and yet i am on the comfortable side of things#once i graduate there's only gonna be money problems and debt and a housing crisis and not being able to do what is right for me and pain a#nd suffering#the fucking bureaucracy#god i hate this country#its not something to look forward to#it feels like im waiting for my execution tbh#so yeah#no wonder im doing my utmost to sabotage myself#tbd
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
My thoughts on episode 5 of PJO: spoilers (less points but more info on those points because OMGS)
-Annabeth knowing Percy is still alive when even Grover HIS PROTECTER wasn’t sure
-THE HUG! THE HUG! It wasn’t some awkward oh we have to hug in this scene thing like Leah went for that hug. Gripping his shirt, closed eyes, relieved sigh and all
- The fates were so cool to see. It was funny seeing just three old ladies in the mix of all the other people
- Percy being in shock the entire first part of the quest and now finally asking the important questions and feeling a tad overwhelmed. Such a realistic, delayed reaction to everything to has happened
- Ares. Not what I imagined, but bought into him eventually. It was a cool take on his character
- Not their heads popping up from behind that cement thing like whack-a-moles. Especially Annabeth
- Persassy and Sassabeth were not having it with Ares’ shit. Sassabeth came out of the gate swinging
- Grover staying behind????
- Oh my gods my percabeth heart was filled to the brim. I was on the edge of my seat for their every line to each other. I was INVESTED
- Annabeth hasn’t seen a single movie?? But why does that fit her character so well??? Post credit scene of episode 8 her and Percy movie date please?????
- WHAT IS LOVE BABY DONT HURT ME
- Not Percy using his powers for the FIRST TIME to save Annabeth’s life
- My girl is slaying with her braids and her tears. Love it
- “You’re better that this than me. You know it.”
- SHE. FUCKING. SAID. THE. THING. Where were you when Annabeth said Seaweed Brain for the first time? I was on my couch, crying and screaming and audibly gasping. Almost choked on my own spit (yes that information was necessary)
- He sacrificed himself for her again
- “I’m not leaving the Underworld without your mom” “I was gonna say come free me after the quest” Forgot the exact quotes but omg they know each other so well already
- Annabeth has come so far already. She sees the twisted, manipulative ways of the gods and unseats of accepting it and continuing it and ignoring it, she actively tries to put an end to it. Her friend isn’t “that way.” She is wise enough to know that she once was that way but wants to change. She is the best character not because she is perfect, but because she sees, acknowledges, and accepts her flaws and actively seeks to better herself. Every award to Leah im serious
- “Thanks for the emotional abuse and cheeseburgers” me to my parents 🫣
There’s so much more I want to expand on and point out and talk about but im probably just gonna make separate mini posts. Guys this episode was EVERYTHING
#percy jackson#percy and annabeth#percy jackon and the olympians#annabeth chase#percabetn#pjo series#pjo tv show#percy pjo#pjo fandom#percabeth#pjoverse#pjotv#pjo#pjo disney+#pjo spoilers#annabeth percy jackson#percy series
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
A Little Death Do Us Part
VANISHED from fandom to work on this thing. as usual it ballooned 🙃 warnings: necromancy, character death (hence the necromancy), dubcon (on account of the necromancy)
My entry for @bigbangharringrove with art I adore by LucaDoodleDoo who also served as cheerleader when I fell behind and suffered from near fatal narrative maximalism. Here's the first chapter, or read on AO3 💛 (3 chapters up, rest day by day)
Billy had been dead for four days when Steve finally made a breakthrough, muffled cracks as bones restitched and the crushed chest cavity filled, the rasp of rusted lungs expanding with breath. He waited, held his own breath like that would encourage another from the sorry test subject lying inert on the table.
The chest deflated, but only a little—his heart leapt as it rose again, an easier inhale, and Steve would have sobbed, except he had no air, could only manage an anguished choke. It wasn’t anguished, though, just pure exhausted relief, hope, after three nights without sleep, using every trick in the book to keep going, keep trying, not give up.
An ear twitched, then—the tail, the tip curling absent-mindedly.
Within minutes, Mews sat on his haunches, staring at Steve fixedly, even more fixedly than normal, before he’d been hit by that truck, but other than that, he seemed—fine? Fine! Even the sickly-sweet eau de rot was dissipating, ginger fur shedding the greasy dullness of decay.
So it took every ounce of self-control not to go haring off to the basement crypt and work his magic there, on the true intended recipient of his tireless trial and error.
Gods in hell, so many errors. And such a trial. One attempt had backfired so spectacularly that Mews had almost decomposed too far for restoration, crumbling before his eyes as Steve scrambled for the counter spell. Another had awoken the cat but hadn’t healed him, and also imbued him with a ravenous hunger for human flesh. The scratches that crosshatched Steve’s every limb had only just begun to scab under the bandages. He’d had to go for the bat that time, beating at the mangy monster like he was trying to win whack-a-mole at the fair, then gulped down every leftover antidote to zombie infection in the medicine cabinet he could find.
He'd been steadily working his way through the moldy copy of Untethered Netherworld: New Necromancies—several editions out of date, banned in every state but New Jersey—and he was running out of both spells and time. Reanimation for more nefarious purposes—raising undead armies and whatnot—had more wiggle room, but true revivification had to be performed within a week of the victim’s death, and the sooner the better.
He didn’t want a shell of Billy, something better off dead. He wanted Billy. Needed him back.
For that, he had to be patient, thorough; do this right. Follow the checklist. Consulting the items hastily scribbled on the back of a takeout menu, he frowned.
Responds when called.
Well, fuck. Did cats ever respond when called? Mews certainly hadn’t—and Steve still wasn’t sure whether that was due to aloof mulishness or because he maintained some preferred moniker that they weren’t privy to.
Nothing for it but to try, though.
“Mews?”
The cat blinked, swished his tail.
Good enough, Steve figured, checking it off.
2. Reacts expectedly to stimuli.
Didn’t exactly have a toy mouse handy, but after rooting around in the junk drawer, he dug up one of those keychain laser pointers. Aimed it at the floor in front of the table, and… skittered it around.
Mews launched from his perch, paws extended—pounced on the zigzagging red and kept pouncing.
Another check.
3. Craves appropriate sustenance.
What did cats even eat, aside from… cat food, which he’d neglected to restock. Tuna? Saucer of milk? Cartoons all seemed to think so.
“Stay here,” he said, though Mews had never been the kind of cat that talked. Locking the workroom behind him, he set off for the kitchen. Pantry had to have at least one can of Chicken of the Sea.
.💀.
The thing was—Steve should’ve known Billy was possessed. Should’ve been able to tell right away. He’d slept next to that… thing at least two nights and hadn’t noticed. How hadn’t he noticed?
He’d kissed him and really been kissing it—wrote off the delayed response, a pause before the returning press, as simple distraction. Held him but really held it, and attributed the strange stiffness to stress, stroked the broad back until he slept—or seemed to.
Because while Steve slept, Billy had been a marionette wreaking havoc, his hijacker attacking at random, opportunistic, installing its brethren on behalf of its master.
On the third morning, the day before he died, when Steve had been watching coffee drip into the pot, the shatter of ceramic spun him round, disoriented. And Billy, eyes streaming, so blue, burning blue—he’d shoved his waiting mug off the center island, was gripping the counter, teeth gritted with effort.
“Go,” he’d grunted between clenched jaws. “Go.” His hand gripped the other mug—Steve’s—and his voice sharpened, urgent. “Run.”
Steve barely dodged it, the mug cracking into the cabinet by his head with far more force than humanly possible, and his childhood training had kicked in. For once, it paid to have been born to parents whose vigilance bordered on paranoid, always on guard against rival families, enemy estates.
He grabbed a kitchen knife, threw every chair in its way, and bolted for the door, slashing behind him as he fumbled with the locks. And ran. Because he trusted Billy with his life, implicitly, knew when a command was the kind performed without question—the tone, the bluntness, the context. It was how they’d survived as an unaffiliated pair, all these years.
But that also meant precious few allies to turn to in times of need. Billy’s sister wasn’t his first choice, but she lived closest, and fleeing on foot put proximity at a premium. To her credit, she’d tried—Steve didn’t fault her for her role in the outcome—Max had just placed her trust in the wrong people. In people that prioritized killing the thing in Billy, rather than saving Billy himself.
Of course, it didn’t help that Billy had been of the same mind.
Now that he’d found a means to bring him back, Steve could admit another reason he hadn’t closed his eyes longer than a blink since the moment Billy went slack: to avoid the endless replay projected behind his lids—of Billy standing between the girl and the monster, a conglomerate creature of melded prey, raw matter drained of humanity, remade into an ever-growing puppet of destruction.
He'd wrested control once more, like he had in the kitchen, long enough to speak the words to unmake the abomination—words he alone could know, unbeknownst to the puppeteer, as the son of a witch infamous for having contracted with a god of death so powerful none could speak its name and live. None could hear its name and live. And none knew it, save two, for a while. And then one.
And then none.
Billy spoke it. Steve saw his lips shape unfamiliar words. For the sake of the girl.
.💀.
A checkmark next to every item on the list—that’s what broke him, finally. Not the most dignified position, kneeling over a litterbox, scooping sandy nuggets into a trash bin while fighting tears of joy, suppressing hysterical, ecstatic laughter, but—Mews was a cat, just a normal cat again, to all appearances, which meant—
He could have Billy back. Had proven wrong every tutor who’d dismissed Steve’s lackluster abilities as beyond the help of instruction. Sufficiently motivated, he’d managed every spell he tried—so it wasn’t his fault he didn’t fully know what each spell would do. This was on his teachers for slouching on the job, handwaving him through his studies to collect a paycheck.
Closing the lid of the bin, Steve stood to wash his hands and swayed, so light-headed he would have toppled were it not for a steadying arm flung to the wall. He breathed slow, eyes closed—opened, and the room had stilled its spinning.
Even so—he needed sleep. If he attempted the most important magics of his life and fucked it up from fatigue, he’d endure the rest of his days tormented by curdling regret.
“Bed, Mews,” he called, out of habit.
They’d held out a week, after Dustin had entrusted them with Mews’ care while he was apprenticing with the bigwigs at Know Where Corporation for the summer. Mewsy prefers sleeping with a buddy, Dustin instructed, among a litany of other highly specific edicts. Well, I prefer fucking my husband without witnesses, Steve had replied, just to see him pull a face, and Billy had chirped, faux-innocent, Unless the price is right. Or unless plied with endless mournful meows and wide, shining, plaintive eyes, apparently, because in no time they had a mound of fur curled at their feet from dusk till dawn.
Despite his exhaustion, despite the comforting warmth of Mews that bled through the covers, despite the meditation exercise to clear his mind, Steve couldn’t drift off for hours, couldn’t stop the steady leak of tears that oozed from the corner of closed lids to his unwashed hair.
Because Billy’s side of the bed was an echoing void at his side, an emptiness cold and loud as an arctic gale. Now and then he nudged Mews with a foot just to hear him snuffle, like an anxious mother checking her silent newborn still breathed.
Think of a wonderful thought, he heard—Billy’s voice, hushed and fond. And like he always did, Steve huffed, “Okay, Peter,” and finally sank into memories that didn’t stab at him the way they had for days.
Tomorrow, he reminded himself, and relaxed. By this time tomorrow, Billy would be whole and hale and back in his arms. He’d kiss him and hold him. Tell him he loved him.
Tomorrow.
Chapter 2
#harringrove bigbang#harringrove#this first chapter features#necromancy#magical abuse of a cat#angst#referenced character death#mild body horror#WAY MORE tags for other chapters on ao3
63 notes
·
View notes
Text
IT'S MIGHTY NEIN DAY LET'S GOOOO
god, the SET, the COSTUMES, travis in full half-orc makeup — fucking gorgeous. but I do have the sneaking feeling that Matt is dressed as young Ludinus.......
The time: seven years after the peace treaty that ended the War of Ash and Light, immediately after the ignition of the Malleus Key. The level: 20. The setting: the Encanter's Rest, Blightshore, where Caleb and Beauregard have landed.
In the midst of this, Caleb has a terrifying realization: if his own collar has been disenchanted, what others have been, too? But Beau's priority is to get to Yasha, who was with Caduceus, and Caleb teleports them there with a chipped piece of gravestone.
The Blooming Grove is healthier than they've ever seen it, and the curse of the Savalirwood has been driven away slightly. Caduceus' hair is a vibrant pink again.
"We made it to the Malleus Key like we planned, but nothing ended as we planned. Da'leth brought down a champion of the Matron, into the heart of the dig site, and he did something — our vision went white, we woke up in a different part of the world —" "Long story short, everything's fucked. I think we need to rally the troupe."
Next stop: the deck of the Nein Heroez, docked in Nicodranas.
Fjord update: his level 20 multiclass is warlock 14/paladin 6, and holy fuck his new art—
Stone's Throw has acquired multiple new ships, including the Rumblecusp Express and the Sapphire of the Sea.
As they travel through Nicodranas toward Veth, they catch wind of something having spooked sea-beasts into the streets.
"I'm sorry, the place is a mess, the world has been turned upside down—" "Wait, something happened here too? What's wrong?" "I have a teenager!"
They sit down to have a conversation, alongside Yeza.
"Uh... Cerberus Assembly, global fuckery, the moon is not where it's supposed to be, Trent may not be imprisoned anymore — and we're getting the Nein back together to deal with it."
Jester update: she took flash recall as her 19th level feat.
Jester attempts to scry on Trent and it doesn't work. They immediately assume that he's broken out and has an amulet, but it could still be that the entire prison is warded against scrying.
"Caleb, do you need an amulet so he can't look in on you?" "Let him come." that's what we call character development!
The Nein, in true Nein fashion, decide to tackle the immediate problem first, rather than trying to push the moon back into space when they don't really know anything about it. Trent joined with Ludinus is far more dangerous than Ludinus on his own, so they'll take down Trent first and play whack-a-mole with the rest of the Assembly later.
Veth isn't sure if she should go with them, but Luc slams his door open — "mom, don't be a coward! You do this every time! You have to be an adventurer for everyone, that's our calling! You can ground me all you want, but I learned it from you!"
Caleb cuts in. "Young man, you do not take your mother's love for granted. Do you understand me?"
They start to leave, but Veth doesn't want to. Caleb draws the circle to the Cobalt Soul archive in Rexxentrum, he steps through, the last to go — and Luc, rogue 5/wizard 3, dashes through at the last second!!
The way the entirety of the Mighty Nein turns on Luc the second they realize he's there and are so protective of him is fucking adorable. Beau challenges him to hit her with a spell, but ol' uncle Caleb counters it and puts him in a wall of force. "We are dealing with people who could kill you with a blink. You are not ready. You are talented, and I'm proud of you, but you're not ready." Luc is out here using Sam's 22 charisma to convince everyone — including Caduecus — to let him stay. Caleb agrees, too, on one condition: that Luc will stay under his eye at every moment, and that he reserves the right to teleport Luc back home the second it becomes too dangerous.
On the upside, it appears that the teleportation circles in the Cobalt Soul are still working.
Since the solstice, the Cobalt Soul has closed its archive doors. They discovered that the master vault has had its wards interfered with and has actually been infiltrated and trapped from within — with Yudala Fon meeting with the king, they ask the Nein to investigate.
Caleb update: Fortune's Favor is his second-level spell mastery choice.
The hallway to the vault leads to a massive adamantine door covered in runes — though it would usually glow blue upon approach, the runes are cold and lifeless. It creaks open without issue.
Inside is a storage room filled with various chained crates, tomes, display cases, and other such things.
In the middle of the floor is a toothy mouth. "Welcome, Bren. You are nothing if not reliable. It feels good to be free — have had so much time to ponder. I can now see how solitude forged you, I now know the greatness that can come from endless quiet and conjecture. At the edges of my mind, many seek me in silence. I wonder If any partnership would meet my standards. I have much to thank you for, my exemplary pupil. It is only fitting you have now taught me, and I return renewed. I must confirm my theories, for they keep many secrets beneath this library. You are welcome to learn what I have, Bren." The magic mouth spell vanishes.
At the far end of the room is a figure, crouched — Aggy, a dwarvish monk (way of the drunken fist, presumably), level 5, played by Wembly Arena's announcer Daniel! The monk was sent into the archive ahead of them, but got caught in some kind of explosion. "Without being too rude, who the living fuck are you?"
Beau update: She got promoted to High Monk!
Fjord uses see invisibility, revealing a handle on the wall that was previously hidden. Aggy goes and headbutts it, inadvertently turning the lever and opening a secret door in the wall.
Through this new door, another mouth appears. "We have all done terrible things, Bren, and we all must be punished for them. I still pay the price, and so too shall he. The Shadowhand must step into his own might. I will tell the Bright Queen of his betrayal, and in this, he shall be made free to follow your path of pain. Only in suffering are we made paragon, and I will make you better; you will be my proudest achievement."
The passage leads to a series of terraced platforms that then lead to a room covered in lockboxes. Each is hidden with invisibility, and protected by various wards.
Aggy, brazenly running down the passageway and sticking his hand on one of the lockboxes, gets instantly killed by a disintegrate.
One of the lockboxes is slightly ajar, and no longer has a trap on it; the inside is empty except for a piece of paper, and another magic mouth appears. "To bleed is to scab, to break is to mend stronger, to hurt is to learn; but recklessness will only leave you dead and forgotten. I was called here to take of its blessing and release one of its forgotten nightmares; arrogance thinks it can use me, but I am the master here. I am he who feeds on ambition, he who drinks of promise and leaves nothing unearned." He tells Caleb to meet him at the ruins of his childhood home — "dinner will be waiting."
Beau comforts Caleb in the way that she does. "You've worked really hard to overcome this. You are above this." "You are right. I don't care that he taunts me. But he doesn't need to be breathing anymore."
With at nat20 plus true seeing, Beau can see the name of what each lockbox contains. The two that were ajar read "adrenus sap," a rare unholy ichor distilled for use in abyssal rituals to bind servants of the abyss or undeath to their domains, or to ensnare such creatures; and "afterimentahl," an arcane binding stone used to capture powerful beings for study, syphoning, or experimentation. The ones known typically contain an entity from the Calamity or before, but the process of creating them has been lost.
back from break and so ready to watch them finally kill this motherfucker—
They put up the tower to sleep for the night, and cast a heroes' feast preemptively.
Caleb uses wish to cast simulacrum on himself to create a copy. He then gives Luc his luck stone, re-attunes his ring of evasion, and casts mind blank on himself before going to bed.
And with a night's rest, Caleb can prepare another 9th level spell or can keep wish — he didn't even have to roll for it because he duplicated a spell! 20th level wizards are a hell of a thing.
With potions drank, fog clouds created, and a heroes' feast had, the Nein plus Luc teleport to Blumenthal.
As they approach, Caleb feels the ghost of his grief, but he has come to terms with it. The house that stands here looks exactly like his childhood home. "I have done what I have needed to do in this world. If I don't walk from this, I need you to get that boy to safety."
Inside, there is laughter — Una's, followed by Leofric's, mingled with Trent's. Caleb walks in, followed by Jester and Fjord. With divine sense, Fjord reads both Una and Leofric as undead. Caleb's simulacrum is polymorphed into a sabertooth to protect Luc. The rest flank the house and watch through the windows.
Breakfast is set at the table. There are seven empty chairs.
"Mother, don't you think it's strange, you haven't changed one iota?" "Not at all. He has given us a second chance." With an insight check, Caleb sees them for what they are: just bodies, reanimated.
Jester leans, says "I'm sorry" to Caleb — and casts turn undead. Both parents fail their saves, fall back. Trent's face falls. "Wery well, then. Perhaps the lesson should start with me." The entire house explodes, but their preparation reduces the damage significantly, and before them is Trent Ikithon, floating up in the air — and where Una and Leofric were are two ghoulish corpses.
time for initiative and combat updates!
Trent's spell save DC is 22. That's just about on-par for a 20th-level wizard with money; a 22 INT plus a robe of the archmagi gets him there, and an arcane grimoire can compensate for no robe or a 20 INT.
Trent can use 2 legendary actions to cast a spell.
Caleb Prime: *downed* Caleb 2: immediately turns into a fucking t-rex
Luc casts see invisibility and reveals that Trent's avatar is an illusory duplicate, and the real Trent is crouched behind a tree like a little fucking creep.
After a chain lightning, a meteor swarm that did higher-than-average damage, and a massive house explosion, everyone's back to full with a mass heal! So with two clerics in the party with a 9th level each, plus a guaranteed divine intervention that can duplicate a mass heal, these fuckers have a latent health pool of 2800 hit points.
Beau update: Her 19th level feat is mobile.
In an antimagic field, Trent is cowering — "but this is why the intelligent prepare. Omentis, be unleashed." The field doesn't suppress artifacts, and he breaks the afterimentahl against his chest. From where he stands, an orb of pitch darkness grows, and a 40-foot entity made of purplish and black shadow, with four arms and glowing purple orbs begins to stalk toward Blumenthal itself.
Seeing that, Caleb plants one palm, two palms on the ground — and uses shapechange to transform into Gelidon, the Nightmare in Ivory.
KAIJU FIGHT!!
and then, just to top it all off, Luc casts enlarge on the fucking t-rex!
"Arty, if there's ever a time we needed you—" Jester uses gate to pull Artagan out of the feywild and right into this fucking kaiju fight. "Don't worry, Jester, I've got y—oh, what have you brought me into?! Really?!"
An archfey, an ancient dragon, a giant t-rex, and the avatar of an abyssal archfiend tethered to the soul of a 20th-level archmage walk into a bar...
With holy weapon active, Yasha does 168 damage in a turn without a crit.
Its full name is Omentis, Scion of Ruin. Everyone within 60 feet gets hit with its "void hunger," automatically takes necrotic damage at the top of its turn. It also has "aura of oblivion," a beam that emits from its face and deals massive (as in, 150 points on a failed save) force damage. Its AC is 24, and it is considered undead.
With his passive perception, Caleb notices that the crystal that Trent shattered is still visible in its chest.
Luc notices and targets the artifact, which causes the shadow holding the creature together to flicker.
Caduceus uses divine intervention (which automatically succeeds) to cause the creature's shadow to become translucent, so that they can see the artifact clearly within it. In the center, with the crystal at his heart, is the shadowy echo of Trent, hanging like a puppet.
what is it with live shows and nat20s at crucial story moments???
With a nat20 strength check, Beau rips the heart from the creature. All the shadows swirl around it and get pulled back into the egg, and as it reforms, Trent himself gets pulled, screaming, into it — Beau tosses it up, Gelidon catches it and smashes it into the ground.
As the dust settles, the people of Blumenthal gather, and the sun begins to rise.
The heart remains intact, but sealed forever with Trent inside it.
Caleb uses demiplane — which opens into a familiar nine-sided tower — to seal the heart away for..... future use.
They decide that after all this, Luc deserves a party — not least of all to celebrate Fjord and Jester's engagement!
At the end of it all, Caleb uses the tower to cook a feast for all of Blumenthal.
"While this was a singular victory, it is still the beginning of much work to be done."
#critical role#critical role spoilers#critical role liveblog#note watches critrole#mighty nein#critical role c2#critical role c2 spoilers#echoes of the solstice#long post#very long post
68 notes
·
View notes
Note
You know worms are harmless things right? Just there burrowing or something and one day I thought "what if Desmond got turned into a worm?" But! Worm Desmond is small! What can he do to help the Assassin's? And now imagine this! One of his ancestors surrounded by enemies and injured and just when they think it's the end a giant worm the size of a train pops out of the ground and crushes everyone and then the thing is infront of the ancestor and thinks they're gonna die too and then the worm just shrinks down to a typical worm size and just lays there as if nothing happened at all.
It would be cool if Desmond was a Mongolian death worm but I'm fine with anything else
This would be fun because Desmond would see himself as useless and, really, this was the Isus’ cruel joke (maybe even Juno) since he couldn’t do anything with a small wiggly body like his.
Still, he persisted and tried to make his way to his ancestor’s main base of operation, wiggling and eating his way from the place he had woken up in… as a worm. He tried to keep underground to not be seen by both humans and any animals that would like to take a bite of him.
Depending on where he had been transported, he could reunite with his ancestor:
Altaïr: Somewhere in the Kingdom section of the AC1 map. Altaïr had just been on his way to his next mission when he saw crusaders harassing one of the outlying towns that were under Masyaf’s protection. This would still be an arrogant Altaïr and he would call out to them and call them cowards who prey on the weak instead of taking one or two down by surprise first.
Ezio: It would be fun (and angst-y) if Desmond finds Ezio while he’s fleeing from the Borgias after the fall of Monteriggioni. He’s heavily wounded and bleeding and the horse he’s riding on was tired with some of Cesare’s soldiers about to catch up to him.
Ratonhnhaké:ton: Somewhere in the vast frontier. Ratonhnhaké:ton is a hunter so he had been hunting for the homestead when he noticed a group of marching redcoats with what seemed to be ‘prisoners’. He tried to save them but it had been a trap and those prisoners turned out to be redcoats themselves and they managed to hit Ratonhnhaké:ton on the head while he had been trying to protect them.
So Ezio and Ratonhnhaké:ton are in a pinch because of circumstances. Altaïr is in a pitch (which he will adamantly deny) because he’s an arrogant dumbass. So Desmond is panicking because he has no idea how to help, oh god, did this even happen in the past? He meant present! Fuck, time travel tenses are fucking hard.
Focus, Desmond!
In his blind panic, he just charges toward the enemies, hoping to… he has no plan! No hope! Just pure panic and a ‘fuck it, let’s see what I can do once I’m there’.
Then when he’s right on top of the center of the enemies…
He doesn’t know why but he felt his entire body warm up.
Almost too hot but bearable for someone like him.
Then…
He just erupted from the ground with large maw open and just… gobbled the enemy right on top of them while toppling those nearby. Then he quickly returned underground.
And sprang back up to take another enemy.
Like some kind of deadly whack-a-mole… (Whack-a-worm?)
(I know you just wanted him to drop over the enemies but I kinda like the idea of Desmond just straight up eating these poor dudes for some reason. No, there is a reason. I love the Tremors franchise and this ask reminded me of a Graboid. Sorry.)
By the end of it, all the enemies had been swallowed whole and Desmond sprang back up one last time to throw up all of the non-organic matter he had swallowed as well.
Seeing the disgust (and fear) on their ancestors’ face, Desmond let out an almost coo-like sound as he tried to say “yeah, me too, buddy, eeeww” and then poof’ed, he’s his old little worm self once more.
He rolled around the ground and looked up to his ancestor with a “pick me up” like gesture.
When their ancestor just kept staring, Desmond tries a “please?” gesture which he was sure wasn’t really helpful.
But… for some reason… his ancestor picks him up anyway.
Unorganized Notes:
The three can’t explain it but there’s something about the worm that ‘calls’ to them. Like they know that it wasn’t a coincidence that they were saved and spared.
Desmond cannot communicate with his ancestors. Even trying to wrap his worm body in a writing tool proved too hard. Up to you if that changes once they get the Apple.
Altaïr would study Desmond and give him various different ‘food’ to see what he would eat. He records everything in a separate journal with sketches of Desmond. Desmond has made a ‘draw me like one of your French girls’ and a ‘no, no, draw me on this side, this is my good side’ joke so many times even though Altaïr just keeps sighing and gently pushing him to get back to his old pose without understanding why Desmond liked those poses so much whenever he starts sketching him.
Ezio eventually fell unconscious and, when he woke up, he thought it had been a fever dream. Until he sees Desmond had hidden in one of his pouches so that the young woman (who was canonically the model of Mona Lisa according to the Reflection comics btw) wouldn’t see him. Ezio is a bit wary of Desmond because he remembered how Desmond had grown so big all of a sudden but he warms up soon enough when all Desmond did was wrap around his neck and chill while he makes his way to Roma. Desmond has a harder time helping Ezio because the flooring of the streets of Roma means he’s ‘headbutting’ each time he pops up and he does have to throw up the ‘tiles’ or whatever they’re called. Ezio’s recruits usually are wary of him but warm up to him once they see that he’s mostly just harmless if Ezio isn’t fighting. They like to feed him fruits and meat that Ezio starts trying to stop them because Desmond keeps eating them until he bloats up and Ezio feels that it’s bad for Desmond. The moment Leonardo is away from the Borgias, he starts studying Desmond. He had wanted to study Desmond the moment he saw him with Ezio but he couldn’t because of the whole Cesare-as-my-current-art-sugar-daddy situation.
Ratonhnhaké:ton believes Desmond is sentient and a hunter himself so he doesn’t try to coddle him and usually lets him get his own food whenever he goes hunting himself. Desmond doesn’t mind since he can eat dirt anyway but Ratonhnhaké:ton still shares a bit of his hunt with him anyway. Desmond doesn’t understand why though since Ratonhnhaké:ton told him specifically to hunt by himself. Ratonhnhaké:ton doesn’t say it out loud but he always worried that Desmond was not eating as he assumed Desmond is a carnivore that needs to become big to hunt down prey. Nah. Desmond is like most worms, dirt is fine. Ratonhnhaké:ton wasn’t worried about bringing him to the homestead because he trusted his instincts that were telling him Desmond was a friend. He truly believes Desmond is some kind of ‘animal’ that just hasn’t been discovered yet.
All three of them tried to give a name to Desmond and, for some reason, they all come up with the same name even without Desmond’s questionable charade capabilities: Desmond. Altaïr believes the name comes from a dream he once had (Desmond is just “???!!!”), Ezio believes he’s just using a name that had been in his mind a lot since Vatican and Ratonhnhaké:ton is perplexed why he picked such a foreign name but it just seemed right, like he just knew that it was Desmond’s name.
I know some people might be squeamish with worms so I’m going to use the “Keep Reading” function. Below is what the Mongolian Death Worm looks like.
Also, the whole ‘sprout from the ground to devour people’ thing that derailed this ask is because of the Graboid. It’s not an actual worm but it would be fun if Desmond looks like a white Mongolian Death Worm but his big form is more similar to the albino Graboid (which is meant to look more like a Mongolian Death Worm than the usual Graboid):
#desmond as a worm au#desmond as a graboid au#maybe?#sorrryyy#if anything#please try watching the tremors franchise#they’re really fun movies#assassin's creed#desmond miles#ask and answer#altaïr ibn la'ahad#ezio auditore#ratonhnhaké:ton#connor kenway#fic idea: assassin's creed#teecup writes/has a plot
78 notes
·
View notes
Text
I hate having OCD its like fucking whack a mole.
The moment I manage to shut up the guy telling me "Ermmm Actually There's Going To Be A Nuclear War Soon And Everyone Will Die And It's The End Times And You Are A Prophet Of God. Source: Trust Me Bro" several more guys telling me "That Bird Is A Drone Spying On You" or "The Smog Is So Thick You Will Get SUPER Lung Cancer And Die" appear
#my post#ocd tag#actuallyocd#cancer mention#ask to tag#i dont often share my shit ass obsessions but i felt the need to do that rn#vent#i guess#ok to rb though#text post
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sam (begrudgingly) reacts to: Dan and Phil play Poppy Playtime CHAPTER 2!
I fucking hate horror games and I am have a high anxiety day so this is like awful timing BUT HERE GOES NOTHING.
- Not a fan of the runtime because I don't enjoy horror so the longer the worse for me personally so fuck this actually oops
- Babes I am literally shaking and almost crying 4 minutes in this will not be fun lmao (but also I know my anxiety won't go away without dan and phil content so might as well hope they will be funny and cute enough to make me calm down).
- I hate this I want to cry UPDATE: I literally started crying right after this, about 8 minutes into the game, but it got better afterwards.
- The touch when saying 'we have to be brave' was very personal to me. (Someone give me someone to watch this with and hold me please because I am scared)
- The buttplug jokes being the only thing to make me laugh, thank you Phil.
Dan what do you MEAN "tails in" in reference to buttplugs, did you see the unhinged shit we said on tumblr, because oh god please no.
- "What are we going to do now?" "Cry" Phil gets me actually thank you I feel seen.
- The color game is actually calming my anxiety SO much it's hilarious, like it's just logic and following patterns and those things are so calming even when Dan is screaming.
- "For our lesbian audience that has mommy issues this is gonna be a weird episode" YOU DONT SAY DAN YOU DONT SAY
- new lore alert: Phil going to a wrestling party
- Phil lore: he was afraid of the KFC man as a kid
- PINOF MENTION AND CLIP AHAHA, they love doing these references since they uploaded the first react video.
- Dan hiding in his hoodie is adorable, like he just fully went "nope!" and hid haha.
- I think you can see Phil's hand shaking in the whack a mole, like the camera was SO shakey which was either his inability to use a mouse or he was shaking, place your bets.
- Dan playing the mini game after all, Phil is never beating the younger brother stereotype truly.
- When did they film all of these that their heating is still broken?! Makes me think they really did pre-film most of these to have a less stressful time now during december, which good job guys!
- Mommy's voice reminds me of someone else in a tv show but I can't figure out what? Anyone know?
- Their delighted faces at seeing jacksepticeye are adorable, like you could tell they were so happy truly and I love these little easter eggs!
- "Sean you down there?" HOWLING
- They edited so many clips and memes into this (which makes me think they edited it rather than an editor) haha
- Phil just, maybe unconsciously, moving impossibly closer to Dan is a big mood (only I am alone rip).
- Weirdly enough the mini games are the most calming part for me, like there is a clear focus and clear objective of what to do and it's like: here is a problem, solve it and I think that does wonders for me.
- Unsure if I am shaking from anxiety or being cold (also great I have more uni work to do after watching this)
- Yes please sanitize my boobs. What
- I agree Phil, we have gotten a lot of lore (about you)!
- Phil's panicked "geese!" gets me every time because it's so cute.
- "I feel kinda bad" aw ofc you do Phil and ofc you don't Dan, so very in character for both of them honestly.
- "Sometime in 2023, so not much longer" Phil, honey, there are like 20 days left what do you mean?!
This actually wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be, after I had my little cry at the beginning. I was actually quite calm by the end and I think my anxiety actually is less, which I didn't think would happen. The magic of Dan and Phil, see you tomorrow!
#dan and phil#amazingphil#daniel howell#phan#gaymingmas#sam reacts#Dan and Phil play Poppy Playtime CHAPTER 2!
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
"Hey guys, it's 8r19h7 eYE2 here. Welcome to my first boss battle - a woman."
If you ask Bright Eyes - which no one is doing nowadays. Or talk to. So rude. - their ultimate weakness has always been hot women. Now you might be asking "Oh, does that mean you're Bi?" or "What's your body count?" or even "Holy fuck, Bright Eyes! When did you get in the shower with me!?" but that's not important. What you should be asking is what type of women Bright's heart explodes for like a car crash.
The answer? Preferably boss-ass bitches that can crush them with a pair of fuck-me-heels with daddy issues of the Frank Ocean level. Google it.
Oh and look! There's one here in Wonderworld! Shoes? Check. A scowl that can only mean the barista got her Starbucks order wrong again? Check. And when she steps away from the shadows, we hit the bonus round.
She's tall and her crown is pure platinum blonde. But like every white woman, she's hard to read but fortunately, Bright Eyes can so they check their text on Whatsapp (boomer apps gave them the hives) for any goddesses that are supposed to be on shift tonight.
Actually, let's go back a bit. Back to this morning when Sam accomplished the impossible and made Bright Eyes go 🕶️outside🌳.
"You know, I was counting down the days when you would finally kill me. I bet sometime this year. Vincent now owes me one of his Lambos. You think he'll be mad if I put some Barbie-friendly decals on it?"
"Bright, I don't mean now. I meant tonight at Wonderworld. Vamps in the Solaire Clan take turns patrolling the area."
Frederick pops into their head like an adorably fat mole. The Bright Eyes in their mind palace (it's actually more of a crack den but whatever) whack it with away because they know the unspoken reason why Sam approached them instead of his Progeny. And why he did so when Frederick was asleep.
But anyway, back to the present!
No hot white women were written in the text. Just a bunch of Vampires who form an anti-Bright Eyes committee™ as soon as they arrive. They ignore Bright for the most part which eventually leads the not-so-Newborn-anymore to the farthest end of Wonderworld where a babe is just chilling beside the vegetation-conquered carousel. Score one for the plants.
And the first thing that escapes from Bright's mouth is, "Good evening. May I inquire if you're a quirked up white woman that can bust it down sexual style so that I can get lost in the sauce?"
The scowl vanishes instantly. Like a father who went out to buy milk.
"Excuse me?"
Giddiness blooms like a weed (you know which ones) in Bright Eyes. She even has a Karen-patent tone! Could this night get any better -
Nevermind. Please wait for Bright's brain to reboot as an impressive set of badonkas-donkas is thrust in their face.
"Are you one of Sam's Progeny?" She didn't ask so much as demands. Like Bright and the world owes her something, everything. They wondered if they started panting because that's seriously hawt.
"I'm what you call a bastard of the magical kind meets with death via Vampiric jumpscare. And that's not a sentence I thought was possible."
Bright has to give blondie some credit; she takes their nonsensical answer in stride and with an eyebrow raised.
"I'll take that as a yes. You fit the rumours at least."
"You heard of me but I don't know who you are. You're hot but... sus. Do I need to eject you?"
"No surprise there. I bet Sammy did everything he could to hide you from me. He thinks he's protecting you, but all he did was made me curious."
"Aww shit, did the clapping of my ass cheeks give me away?"
"...Are you fucking high?"
"Probably. I had a shot of vodka with my honey milk boba tea with extra pudding and 100% sugar before I left. Fuck coffee when you can just meet god, amirite?"
The woman closes her pretty gold-ruby eyes. She exhaled and Bright could literally hear her mentally counting down.
"You're unlike any creature that I ever have the misfortune to come across."
"Uh, correction: you found me. And I still don't know if you're a quirked up white woman that can - "
"Enough. I get it. Are you usually like this when it comes to women?"
"Hey, I thought I would be holding in my rizz 'till the heat death of the universe! So who are you o' beautiful sour cream?"
"Careful, I can't tell whether that's an insult or a compliment."
"Sounds like a you problem, chief."
Apparently, magic does exist because despite the non-stop verbal trainwreck that's coming out of Bright's mouth, the woman's lips nearly twitch a smile.
"You're ballsy and stupid. I like that. The name's Alexis. A pleasure for you to meet."
Yes! Bright made it to Phase 2, bitch!
"They call me Bright Eyes, my IQ is the highest among the Redditors on the 'Am I The Asshole' subpage - "
"That isn't saying much."
" - And welcome to the ruins of Vincent's hopes and dreams."
Now that made Alexis burst out a gut. Seriously, she's clutching her stomach with tears in her eyes. It boosts Bright's confidence as a future stand-up comedian. Their 'flirting?' went well but Bright didn't sense the spark of interest within the older Vampire. Boo.
"Right. I've decided to kidnap you now. How accurately can you predict your... Grandmaker's reaction?"
"As accurate as my opinion on the Internet."
"Wonderful. I hope you like shopping and breaking the fabric of time and space on the highway."
And that, readers, is how Bright Eyes won against Alexis Getty-Solaire without getting Miyazaki'd.
#monotony's rambling#redacted asmr#redacted audio#fanfic#redacted bright eyes#redacted alexis#i have no idea what this is#think i watched too many max0r videos#wrote this shit in half an hour and now i'm gonna pass out
32 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh my god guys. I have not bought concert tickets through Ticketmaster in a fucking age, and I had no idea how bad the user experience has gotten. The Hozier show in Seattle sold out in FIVE MINUTES. It's a 9000 person venue. What the fuck. So I hop onto the pages for Vancouver and Portland.
The queue function is basically useless because the server is overwhelmed and can't get you accurate information quickly enough, which seems to defeat the whole goddamn purpose of having one. And when you actually get in to pick tickets? It's like the worst goddamn game of whack-a-mole because there's an extremely good chance somebody else has clicked on it before you. It's so stressful!
Anyways, the Swifties are right in this one regard and Ticketmaster has to die. When the revolution comes, they're definitely in the top five against the wall.
26 notes
·
View notes
Note
why isn't the keep reading thingy working
"Ten. Do. Not. Move."
Tenebris was helpless as a duck as he sat on the couch, still as a rock. His eyes were teary and wide- well, even wider than usual. On the top of his bunch of unruly blonde curls perched the worst of them, the queen of all insects.
A spider, big as an Oreo and as black as his worst nightmare.
“I’m gonna come over and squish it.” Emcy forced their tone to be calm. They knew dogs could smell your fear, and they weren’t about to test if spiders can too. “Don’t panic. Don’t move. You’re gonna be fine.”
Tenebris whimpered pathetically, his ability to form a coherent sentence long gone. Emcy inched across the living room, their footsteps silenced by the carpet. The spider remained on Tenebris’s head, seemingly unaware of its inevitable end as it advanced across the room, clutching the fearsome weapon known as the paper towel.
“On three.”
The spider was still.
“Two.”
The spider did nothing.
“One- FUCK!”
Quick as lightning, the eight-legged horror jumped off its mountain of golden curls and slipped into the collar of Tenebris’s jacket. Emcy cursed some more and pounced at their boyfriend, yanking him off the couch and stripping off his jacket in one smooth move. Tenebris soon caught on to the situation and screeched like a pterodactyl as he faceplanted onto the carpet, frozen in place as his girlfriend played whack-a-mole with the spider on his back. He felt a particularly hard smack and heard a hoot of triumph.
“See?” Emcy grinned, hoisting him back into a sitting position on the floor. They wadded the dirty tissue up, then threw it carelessly over their shoulder. “It’s dead- mmf!”
Tenebris spun around and crushed them into one of his familiar, too-tight hugs. His face fit perfectly in the crook of their neck. They could feel his breath as he muttered unintelligible phrases into her neck, the faintest shade of stubble tingling at their neck. Ever so grateful, Emcy melted into their boyfriend’s warmth. They sat there cuddled together for god knows how long, two puzzle pieces finally fitted together after a lifetime of searching for the right other half.
But everything changed when the fire nation Tenebris attacked.
Tenebris’s hand left Emcy’s shoulder and reached for their belly, and the battle was on. Laughter soon filled the living room as the couple rolled around the carpet, reaching for each other’s stomachs and armpits and trying their best not to stab each other’s eyes out. After quite a while, Emcy saw an opening and took it, flipping their boyfriend over like an egg and sitting on his back.
“Given up yet?” They teased, running their hands through his hair. Tenebris gave an indignant huff and began to purr into the carpet.
Emcy smirked. “C’mon, let’s go take a shower.”
Tenebris’s head popped up. “Together?”
“Together.” Emcy stood up from his back, expecting him to follow.
Tenebris didn’t respond.
“C’mon Ten, don’t make me drag you!”
Slowly, Tenebris dragged himself to his elbows. His face seemed a lighter blue than usual, shaking as he got to his knees and tried to croak out something.
“Ten? Ten, are you-”
Tenebris coughed once, twice, then hacked out a huge puddle of blood.
“TEN!”
Emcy was kneeling in front of him in an instant, trying to pat him on the back, get him to lie down, to do anything to stop the stream of blood coming out of their boyfriend’s mouth. With one last hack, Tenebris slumped forwards into Emcy’s arms, pale as can be and barely breathing.
Emcy couldn’t stop the flow of gibberish they were spouting as they got Tenebris into a sitting position. They were pretty sure that he wasn’t breathing. “Ten, oh my god, are you okay, oh shut up you’re obviously not, do you need anything? Water? Hot choc-”
Tenebris inhaled with a sudden gasp. Life seemed to flow back into him as his chest began to rise and fall once again, the usual blue flooding back into his face.
“Hot chocolate?” He croaked, sitting up and looking at you like an excited puppy.
Emcy tried their very best not to smack him. They succeeded. Barely.
“Tenebris,” they said, trying to keep their voice flat, “What the hell was that back there again?”
“What?” He didn’t seem a bit like he was messing with you, with a genuinely confused stare and just a bit of disappointment from the fact that he was most likely not going to get hot chocolate.
“Tenebris. You just chucked up a bunch of blood on the carpet. That doesn’t happen every day.”
Your boyfriend looks genuinely lost with this conversation. “Blood?” He sat a bit straighter and looked around. “I didn’t cough up blood- ”
His eyes landed on the rather large patch of blood slowly soaking into the carpet. Poor carpet.
“Tenebris. This isn't funny.” Emcy knew their boyfriend was physically incapable of lying, but they didn't think they'd lost their mind just yet. “You just coughed up a bunch of blood-”
“Has Keith been eating flowers?” Tenebris scooted himself to the edge of the puddle and bent down to the red surface, then sniffed it like a dog. “Yeah. Definitely flowers.”
“What?” They could practically feel the confusion welling up inside them. “Tenebris-”
“No, I’m serious.” Gingerly, he poked a finger into the red puddle and fished out a chunk of red goop, then rubbed it in his hand until the blood came off. He held it up to his nose and gave it a long., hard sniff. “I think it’s a red carnation.”
“Heartache,” Emcy blurted out. They had been helping out in the flower shop for quite a bit now. Keith had to come to their rescue when a guy came in and demanded a bouquet that said fuck you in a passive-aggressive voice, but most of the time, they could hold their own at the counter.
“Why the hell would Keith eat flowers?”
Emcy shrugged. “Beats me.”
“Whatever.” Tenebris scooted over and scooped Emcy into a cuddle. “Can I still have hot chocolate?”
“No.”
“*Sad Tenebris noises*.”
why is the formatting all weird
also can tenten beat the sans fight
Okay, now I'm invested in your story! This was great!
And I dunno what you mean about formatting, it looks fine on my end. And yeah, Tenebris can probably beat the sans fight lol
32 notes
·
View notes
Text
Welp all the doctors on my care team are having a Socratic seminar to see if i should go get another drainage procedure done when I'm through with my maintenance course of antibiotics or if it's not even worth it bc this second new abscess was already almost 4cm big less than 2 months after getting out of the hospital and god knows if another one will just show up when that ones gone
It's like fucking whack a mole in here
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
Personally, Stormblood has always been on the discontent side for me. I was invited to try FFXIV in the last days of Heavensward by an acquiantenance. And was nearly completely uninterested in the experience. I got to maybe level 30 back when Paladin used Flash to gather enmity. And was so use to WoW's whack-a-mole ability system that the GDC felt sluggish and unwieldy. Plus the main story, the strongest point and selling point of any FF game was locked behind grind-a-thon leveling? People's suggestions at the time to even level through from 30 - 40 was to do levequests. And that was...an entire 12 hours I'm not getting back. And it seemed like too my grind for too little story at the time. So I dropped it.
I came back again when Legion was about to hit for WoW and I was kind of burnt out on WoD grinds and felt a brick wall in place of anything of interest. You had to spend TP for Sprint and like...Samurai's AoEs consumed a god awful amount of that so it severely limited them. But hey, at least I had gotten to Heavensward this time and found it...okay? It was overhyped and felt like it under delivered. Sure the questing and flying made it a breath of fresh air compared to grinding pre-patched Post-ARR but man I expected it to come out with chocolate cake and a free house for me to live in for the rest of my life. But it was just a decent little expansion and I pushed through it and its post to the beginning of Stormblood. Where I got my first experience with the frustrating fight with Zenos and got to the beginnings of the Ruby Sea before I just bounced off it once again. And went back to WoW to enjoy the entirety of Legion.
But then BFA happened and god damn was I just...so fucking burnt out on grinding World Quests, Reputation, Dailies, and so forth. That I was like "Fuck it, fine. I will literally Dark Souls this game by bashing my head against the metaphorical brick wall and get through this." So I leveled through the Ruby Sea. Fought Susanoo for the first time and then...and I shit you not, the literal moment I left Susanoo and entired the cutscene after, my graphics card died. Since I was still a poor College student at the time. It took my 3 months or doing odd jobs and getting paid under the table to save up enough for a new one. But I decided if I was going to bang my head against the wall, I better do it proper.
So I created Genixma and bashed my head all the way through the A Realm Reborn thru Stormblood MSQ. This was the dying days of Stormblood, so the Shadowbringers hype train was going. And while it LOOKED cool, I had been burnt by Heavenswards' overhyped expansion before. So I just sort of meandered through the story. And found Stormblood...completely underwhelming. The Yda to Lyse beat felt weird, Zenos did jack shit the entire time, I didn't like Fordola or even know why Yotsuyu was here and then gone. The Azim Steppe felt like Dances with Wolves but like...in the worst way possible. The FUCKING AETHER CURRENT PLACEMENTS IN THE LOCHS (at the time) CAN KISS MY FUCKING ASS! And like, the ending to Zenos and everything was like...it felt like I played A Realm Reborn but condensed to 10 levels of story.
The only good thing I enjoyed about Stormblood is that I didn't have to level two jobs to unlock my advanced job. And Bard felt amazing to play. It literally had its own rhythm. But since the MSQ didn't blow me out of the water. I decided to just engage with the Roleplaying community on Mateus (this was before Realm Travel was a thing, so you just had to make do). Met some cool people, failed at making an active guild, and then Shadowbringers launched. I started shitposting on here, started a personal vendetta against Titania, and actually, Shadowbringers was the first expansion and beat of the story I really enjoyed. But this is about Stormblood and how it hit at a time where I was just burnt out on the MMORPG experience. So, unfortunately, it didn't get a fair shake but honestly, first impressions are important and Stormblood failed to do it.
So yeah, thats my experience with the game up until Stormblood. I did not care for it or most of its characters. Especially the second half Ala Mhigo which felt SUPER padded like they were trying to squeeze in as much story as Doma had in like...4 - 3 levels of content. And last, and what fucking annoys me to this day. We go to free Doma from Garlean rule so they can aid us in taking back Ala Mhigo. We free Doma and then fight through Ala Mhigo freeing 99.99% of it. And Doma only shows up, LITERALLY, at the last moment. Not as a hail mary but as aerial support. Like...had it not been for Zenos. We could of probably freed Ala Mhigo in the first 5 levels. And its only because Zenos did NOT give a flying FUCK that we did completely retake Ala Mhigo. In fact, Zenos is a nothing burger of a character in hindsight. Its like he was created specifically so we'd have road block to retaking Ala Mhigo in the first 5 levels and force us to go reclaim Doma instead.
Endwalker story telling analysis and metaphors for the character aside. Zenos literally sat around and did jack shit for 3 expansions total. That combined with Doma showing up at literally the last moment and treated with fanfare when it felt like, "Oh, the kid who was sick this entire group project finally came to school today and will get full credit for 0.1% of the work" kind of feeling.
A Realm Reborn was boring and rough.
Heavensward was overhyped but also kind of a smooth experience.
Stormblood...feels like they should of gone for Ala Mhigo or Doma. Both feels like they were trying to have their cake and eat it.
That was my first reaction to each chunk of the story thus far.
Next week, lets see how many people like Shadowbringers.
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Pacifist
Stranger things reader insert drabble. It us not specific to any character, but reader gets stuck in the upside down with Eddie, Robin, Steve, and Nancy.
“Holy mother of god!” I screamed. Steve continued to bash the freaky mutated bat into the ground. He let go once it was dead and motionless.
“What the hell, Y/n? You could have helped.”Robin claimed, looking between the bats and me.
“What!?” I sort of shrieked out.
“Yeah man, not cool, you could have pitched in,” Steve entered his two cents, checking out his wounds.
“You did kind of just scream and duck,” Eddie pointed out.
“I mean, you did at first do the same. What’s your excuse Munson?” I asked.
“What’s my excuse, what’s your excuse? You flipped a lid and freaked out on us while the demon bats or whatever went all bloodthirsty and shit.”
“I’m a pacifist, for gods sake. I don’t condone or support violence. So what else would I do besides running around like a headless chicken, screeching till all of our ears bleed.”
“You have to be kidding me, a pacifist, really?” Steve questioned, finally looking at me.
“Yes, a pacifist, I don’t believe in violence.”
“I think the creepy crawlers from down here are the exceptions to that, Y/n!” Robin said rushedly.
“What? No! I actively protest against animal testing, why in the world would the fact that those things come from here change any of my beliefs and outlooks on violence?”
“Because these things will kill you!” Steve still didn’t understand my point.
“Hey, everyone! It doesn’t matter anymore. We need to get out of here,” Nancy exclaimed, her point holding lots of validity.
Everyone agreed nodding their heads mumbling ‘yeah’ and ‘let’s do that’. We all turned to the gate, only to find more of those freakish bats squaring us up.
“We can take them”
“Me not included, obviously, but I’m sure all of us could get by without you guys causing too much damage.”
“Y/n!” The group yelled simultaneously.
“Okay, okay. I will try to help without being over the top,” I stated with my hands held up somewhat defensively.
Eddie handed you an oar, “here, just pretend you are playing whack-a-mole.”
“Oh my god, pacifist, I’m a freaking pacifist. I am not a violent person. I have never played whack-a-mole.”
“You’ve never played whack-a-mole?” Steve asked. “You’re missing out, L/n.”
“I swear to god I will make a very offensive monologue directed towards you, Harrington.”
“Or you could just hit him,” Eddie added.
“For fucks sake,” I threw my head back, “I’m a pacifist!”
#stranger things#eddie munson#stranger things season 4#stranger things x reader#stranger things imagine#stranger things s4#upside down#robin buckley#nancy wheeler#steve harrington
61 notes
·
View notes
Note
"oh fuck it's the things Dad was keeping out"
FHASBANEUW PLEASE It sounds like Dialga views these two like one would view a pair of really big, agressive spiders. Like, Dialga could theoretically get the god equivalent of a rolled up newspaper and twack em but they are scuttling toward him quite quickly and its freaking him out - scale anon
They’re like the equivalent of that one video where someone smacks a spider with a newspaper only for all the babies that she was carrying to start crawling everywhere and engulfing the floor in a puddle of spider babeys
(Courtesy of Penicula who is stealing the eldritch bois and turning them into a race for Pathfinder)
Eldritch Entities are a bit worse than just a really big, fast spider that broke into your house- Gods keep them out of their creations because they tend to either a) Usurp the Gods or b) Bend reality to a point the universe is a twisted shell of itself, uninhabitable to anything but the Eldritch entities themselves, or c) Eat and/or just destroy the universe once they’ve completed some sort of goal in it.
But also yes, Arceus has the biggest divine newspaper (Sunday Edition- Extra holy and also Extra thicc) and is getting ready to smack the twin idiots (twidiots?) But they just keep scuttling in and out of the tunnels around Unova like some high-stake game of whack-a-mole
#Seth.isthisshitposting#Seth.anon#Seth.asks#Scale Anon#Demon AU#Monster AU#Demon Submas#Monster Submas
71 notes
·
View notes
Text
11:45 AM
"Ouch! What the fuck was that for?!"
You yelled, looking at Jaemin who just smacked your ass out of nowhere.
There he stood, face contorted into amazement as he stared into his palm.
"Dang," he smirked at you, "you've got such a bomb in there, huh?"
You deadpanned, him continuing his teasing gaze at you.
"Maybe we should play whack-a-mole using those babies and my hands as the hammer."
Moments like this always make you think, 'What's with him?'
"Jaemin, I swear to god-"
"Or maybe." he cut you off, an idiotic expression on his face, yet the smile he directs at you made him look so handsome. (and it's unbelievably ethereal despite his sudden influx of weirdness)
"We could do other activities with it."
His suggestive idea, matched with his wiggling eyebrows allowed you to assess just how much you love this fool.
You smiled, walking towards him and cupping his cheeks before stretching it widely, "Go to Mark for that honey, that man's butt defeats all other butts out there."
#nct dream#nct dream fluff#nct dream angst#nct dream smut#nct dream x reader#nct dream scenarios#nct dream fanfic#nct dream au#nct dream reactions#nct imagines#nct fluff#nct smut#nct fanfic#nct jaemin#nct dream jaemin#na jaemin#nct na jaemin#nct dream na jaemin#jaemin imagines#jaemin fluff#jaemin#jaemin smut#jaemin angst#jaemin scenarios#jaemin x reader#jaemin fanfic#na jaemin imagines#na jaemin smut#na jaemin fluff#nct dream imagines
79 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
astoldbymyeesha
As Told by Myeesha
catladyrph
（ΦωΦ）
bgomtori
my blue spring
spacesaturnarts
Saturn🪐
fanicwonder
💜Believe💜