my sexual fantasy as an asexual person is having someone feel comfortable enough to fall asleep in my arms. maybe we're like watching a movie or something late at night and we're both a bit tired and they tighten their grip around me and lean into me a bit more using me like a pillow and then they just !!! fall asleep in my arms and so i cant move because they're asleep and so now i need to sleep while cuddling them

hevans spa night

Exactly.

And it would take place in s3 when Sam’s living with the hudmels. They’re so close while they put on the face masks… Kurt is practically sitting on Sam’s lap and their faces are inches apart (and honestly vice versa. Sam sits on Kurt’s lap too some nights. It’s just whatever the vibe is. Literally golden retriever boyfriend behavior)

For the more edible facemask, like yogurt with honey and tumeric, Sam would take a lil lick of it bc why not, it’s literally just yogurt & Kurt half heartedly “scolds” him only to let Sam feed him a lil bite because if he’s serious… he has thought about doing that multiple times before

Before they’re out about the relationship (bc hello Sam would overthink how Burt would react after graciously giving him a roof to live under), Finn would sometimes barge in and be like “Oh sick! Is this some gay thing I don’t know about… Can i join? Not in the gay way tho” bc he wants to get closer to his brother 🫶 it’s like how Finn secretly enjoys Kurt bringing warm milk every night for “lady talk.” With anyone else, Kurt would’ve loved to fill up Finn, but not when Sam is the person he’s having a spa night with. Literally they were about to share a lil kiss kiss while Kurt was moisturizing Sam’s face, jeez Finn 🙄

.

I keep my room blacked out.

Sunrise feels like a betrayal when you aren't here with me.

Remember how it took a Skill bond with Fitz for the Fool to realise that Fitz actually loved him and hadn't just been humouring him all these years out of pity I'm gonna fucking vomit

hold me

i literally have the bestest friends ever. like of all time

also quite obsessed with karl being as detached from the story as he is. there's nothing that makes him have to be the detective that has to be involved, but he unknowingly dooms himself by agreeing to work with the KYAL cult. every other detective basically deals with elias head on except weissman, who only meets him right before he kills him. like he's right when he says "by my choices" because everything that leads him to being mixed up with the mannix cult is himself. it's the gambling debts and the choice to do the dirty work for an organisation he knows nothing about. he's the only one that doesn't encounter that body doing police work and it's specifically because he's told to cover it up. he gets himself into the mess and eventually fixes it but the fact that esther always dies in the doomed timelines and he's always too late even if he starts wanting to change things ("till this child. esther.") it just makes me very ill

okay im sorry but just imagine being kageyama tobio. your parents are always working late, your sister quit volleyball years ago and now she's off being an adult and having a career, none of your teammates get why you care so much and the only guy who did, because he cared the same amount in the same way, graduated 2 years ago and also hated your guts. your peers have given you a cruel nickname just so they can reinforce how little they like or understand you, you dont have any friends, you have nothing but volleyball actually, your grandfather is dead and you are clinging to the promise he made you when you were a little kid because if you dont you might just go insane. you are so, so incredibly lonely.

and then, THEN, this scrawny 5 foot nothing kid stares you down outside the gymnasium bathrooms and promises to beat you, and he totally sucks at volleyball. like, he. is. terrible. but he can run, and he has good reflexes, he jumps so high he looks like he's flying, and most importantly he runs headfirst into a wall and then says 'we haven't lost yet' like its the most obvious thing in the world when his teammates ask him why he bothered. and you realise this kid is just like you, the same kind of fucked in the head you are. and youre furious, what the hell has this guy been doing for the past 3 years? your grandfather promised you that someone even better would come and find you are here he is, but you beat his team in less than an hour and you're pretty sure you'll never see him again, despite him promising to take you down, because never once in your life has anyone who was supposed to stick around actually do that. you're angry because you didn't have to be so painfully lonely all these years, you could've had someone who kept up with you, but he just wasn't there, because he sucks and you don't but he doesn't have to and that makes it so much worse than you just being a freak who was completely one of a kind.

and then you go back to your team, back to your last middle school tournament, and you play more games. only this time youre pissed. you know that there's someone else like you now, someone who will. not. stop until the ball has hit the floor and you don't get why your teammates won't just be better, try harder, move faster. and then they abandon you too. you thought you were alone before, but now you have absolutely nothing, not even volleyball. and you didn't get into the school your grandfather went to, and the coach you picked your back-up school for is in the hospital, and your plan for the next 3 years is to essentially bide your time until you get scouted into the v-league because you literally do not have anything left and you are doing everything your 15 years old and incredibly depressed self can because you refuse to let go of volleyball, no matter how lonely it makes you, no matter how much it hurts to cling on.

and then, AND THEN. that same scrawny dumbass from that 2-0 match in middle school is there and he still sucks and he's still the same kind of fucked in the head that you are and you won't give him one of your 'royal sets', not after what happened last time, you can't stop being lonely but you can at least try to not get abandoned again. and he says 'forget all that, i'll be here no matter what', and he spikes the damn set. he shuts his freaking eyes and he trusts you and you have just had the rug pulled out from underneath your damn feet because you understand, maybe better than anyone else, being ready to do whatever it takes to win but who the hell just fully puts their faith in someone else like that and maybe, just maybe, this kid was serious when he swore he'd get better and take you down.

he's invincible as long as youre there and so are you as long as you have him. you ask him if he's prepared to go all the way to the world stage to take you on, because you've never set your sights anywhere else, and he tells you he'll match you every step of the way. he picks up your crown, puts it right back on your head and proves to you that he refuses to leave you just like everyone else did, even at your worst. you tossed and he spiked and he said 'i'm here' and he is.

he is, and he never stops being here for you, chasing after you, making you chase after him, even when he's on the other damn side of the planet. and then 6 whole years after you first met him, first played him, first thought that maybe your grandfather would keep his promise to you, you get to play him again and you realise that he is your someone even better, always has been. actually, they all are. and you're not that lonely tyrant you used to be anymore, youre not that sad, abandoned kid hiding behind anger and obsession, you're doing the thing you love surrounded by people who love it in the same fucked in the head way that he and you do, and the man you love is there across the net from you, playing against you, and he's also there on the court next to you, playing with you, and either way he is here.

you got really, really good at volleyball, and somebody even better came and found you.

he's here.

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐳𝐞

𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐲 𝐞𝐱𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲

𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧, 𝐬𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲

you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah

TK/Carlos + Looks

↳ 2.08 Bad Call

THE LITTLE HINT ABOUT XIE LIAN'S PARENTS' DEATH IN THE NEW EPISODE IS MAKING ME WEEP LIKE. WHAT. WHAT

good morning. neuvillette with a dragon!child!reader who, once everything blows over in fontaine, goes to find furina and gives her the biggest hug. they've known her for a very long time. and many times, perhaps she almost, almost cracked to them... but her resolve stood strong every time, and she would backtrack with a laugh and some dramatic flair.

while they can't understand how badly she must have suffered, because they aren't human and their mind is not so fragile, they can at least imagine it. and they can't help but think that maybe she doesn't want to be alone right now; she's been alone for five hundred years. if she wants to be left alone... that's fine, and they know she'll tell them that, but at the very least, as one of her best friends (perhaps her very best one), should they not go check on her?

idk i'm going to play her story quest today probably so i will return with more thoughts!

Kristen Arknights is giving me brainworms this cannot continue

Before Lone Trail, I was really convinced that "ah yeah so she's really evil", like what, she approved and conducted the Diabolic Experiment? She approved the experiment at Site #359 and was probably looking at the giant Hub from her window, presumably while eating popcorns, and when Saria arrived to scream at her "WHAT THE FUCK" Kristen just replied "Oh hey I knew you would solve it"? She also funded Loken's Watertank and collected his data on children experiments after he got arrested??

Any sane person would be calling her an egoist, a betrayer, a seeker, a loner

And yet, she was a pioneer.

Lone Trail dropped and now, I don't even know what to think anymore of this character. Like I don't approve what she has done, but also, I don't hate her. She put me into a state of mind I can't think straight anymore. This dog is TRULY fucked up.

She was obsessed, truly obsessed by her dream. She wanted to achieve what her parents had failed to do. She wanted to honor her family, to prove something to the world. To find the truth. To break the sky.

And she fucking did it. She absolutely did. She achieved it, she had done what nobody has ever done before. Regardless of the methods, regardless of morals and ethics, what she did was HUGE. That night, everyone on Terra looked up at the sky. She made a huge step forward, she revolutioned and changed things. The moment she pierced the starpod, a page in the history of the world had been turned, a new era has started. This event was major. And countless scientists will look up upon her, and for ages, her name will be praised.

And she did at what cost? Everything. Her own life, her friends.

I can't stop thinking about how much she tried to keep Saria away from her. I thought that Kristen was using Saria, that she didn't care about her, but actually it's... Something else. She does care about Saria, but it's Saria who was completely obsessed with Kristen. It's Saria who refused to let go. Of course, Saria devoted her life to protect Kristen, she wanted to stay with her until the very end. Kristen did not wanted it, she wanted Saria to continue to live on. It's her dream, and she's ready to die to achieve it. Not Saria's. Nor Muelsyse's.

I can't stop thinking about how she tried EVERYTHING to stop Saria. She studied her Arts, found ways to supress them, created Power Armors to neutralize them, she showed coldness to Saria to keep her away. But god, Saria was clingy as hell. If Kristen had to get to install a trap door in her spaceship SPECIFICALLY for Saria, that's to say how much Saria did not want to let go.

Saria was ready to die for Kristen, she was ready to stay with her until the very end. But Kristen always had in mind to go alone.

And in the end, she had to show Saria that she deserves to live, to continue, that there's still people who need her. Rhine Lab needs her. Ifrit needs her. Silence needs her. Rhodes Island needs her. She can't join Kristen like that. She can't die yet.

Even if Kristen was obsessed by her dream, she was still able to care enough for Saria and the people around her.

And god fucking damn I'm crying

Kristen is absolutely the best antagonist of all Arknights there's absolutely no way we can't do better, I'm standing on my ground

speedrunning my own fandom experience