ok 2 things

1) if i see ANY marisha hater say anything about being happy, it is ON SIGHT. dont try me demons.

2) Idk i disagree w everyones takes about raise dead/revivify/resurrection etc not working or bringing back a 20 year old laudna? like i think its clear either way that the spell will work- it would be hostile to players to not allow that, in a way matt just... doesnt seem to be. furthermore like... i didn't like the kingsley thing w/ molly and while i know its not 1:1 comparison I just do not want laudna to be a similar case at all. I want her to remember her friends, I want her to come back /as she was/. like it feels almost antithetical to her character for her to come back """fixed""" and without any connection or love for the people around her.

i think the reason why people don’t like mai for zuko is because zuko is already a very grumpy, angry, pessimistic person and so is mai soo they reasoning is that he needs somebody with a more opposite and optimistic, personality like jin and katara who are more nice and caring than mai idk cause zuko does cheer up a little at the end aand katara is more supporting at the end at least oor that’s what people say idk what do you think? why does zuko chooses mai and not jin or katara? and what do you think of the people who “knows whats best for z ??

Anon, I'm gonna be honest here: the people that genuinely dislike Mai with any kind of bias affecting their judgement are very rare. Anyone who tells you the overwhelming hate she gets, both as Zuko's girlfriend and as her own character, are not 99% the result of zutarians being bitter that she "stole Katara's man" are either lying to you or were lied to.

Mai, alongside Ty Lee, is one of the most chill antagonists of the show. Zuko was far grumpier and MUCH more furious than she ever was. Hell, her main deal is that she is always too chill because she was taught to repress her emotions and not voice her opinions.

THIS is why she is Zuko's true opposite, the yin to his yang. When he is letting his emotions cloud his judgement, she's the voice of reason. And in turn, when she's getting too distant, he makes get out of her shell and connect. They've had their issues, sure, but by the end of the show they were all pretty much fixed.

Also, I would NOT call Zuko a pessimistic character. He has low points and moments of panic, but that boy kept himself mostly sane during three years of exile by holding onto to hope that, maybe, just maybe, this supposedly dead enemy of his nation that had been seen in 100 years was not actually dead, thus his mission wasn't pointless, and he'd have a way home. Just look at how over-confident Zuko is battle and at how many life threatening situations he got himself into because he acted without a plan, assuming that everything would turn out alright somehow. That boy is an optimist. A grumpy, moody, reckless optimist, but still.

Again, that's the kind of situation where he and Mai would ballance each other out. She likes the thrill of these adventures as much he does, but she will NOT act without thinking. Hell, she won't even put up with stuff that is not dangerous but that she considers beaneath her (see her refusing to follow orders in "The Drill").

This is thing that really bothers me about shipping, not just in this fandom: people forget that no one wants to date their clone, but no one wants to date their COMPLETE opposite either. You need common ground.

Katara and Zuko have the same temperament - proud, strong-willed, stubborn, wearing their hearts in their sleeves, and willing to get VERY mean when pissed off (never forget the "The stars look beautiful tonight. Too bad you can't see them, Toph!"). Then being a couple would just BEGGING for them to have some very ugly fights. As for their differences? Like I've said a million times before, their goals in life are so different they wouldn't even live in the same country. How could a romance between EVER work?

Ty Lee's temperament would be a good ballance for Zuko's, but the most common ground they have is they hang out with the same two girls and maaaaybe Zuko believes in auras too since he basically demanded Mai to defend herself when Ty Lee insulted her aura (this is totally not me letting my headcanon of Zuko taking that stuff 100% serious and writting down everything Ty Lee says on the topic cloud my judgement). Other than that, we see that Zuko clearly wants to be Fire Lord, and while Ty Lee just wanted to go back to the circus or travel around with her new friends. We barely get any interaction between them, so acting like there's evidence for her to be his perfect match is quite the stretch.

Same for Jin. They got along well enough on their date, but that was just for short bit of an episode, not even the entire episode itself. That's too little to claim she could be "the one" for him.

With Mai meanwhile, we had a ton of episodes, in which we got to see their relationship's ups and downs, and see that they managed to bounce back from some pretty serious conflicts and still clearly adore each other after it all.

As for Zuko choosing her over any other girl, it's simple. He likes her. He likes her dry/sarcastic humor, how badass she is, how much she enjoys physical affection, how she doesn't put with any bullshit fro anyone (including himself), how she was bold enough to basically tell him, Azula and Ty Lee to fuck off, how pretty she is when she hates the world (unbelievably iconic line) etc.

Mai is Zuko's type of girl, she likes him back, and they are compatible, and thus they ended up together. It's not rocket science.

.

Deadass did i go thru the stages of grief with someone

I cried & cried, scary depressed, cried cried cried

Said if they come back ill make a major change at their whim

Now im just furious & angry at them

Idk the order but fuck im pissed rn

Have i not suffered enough, how much do they want, so many tears, such despair, desire for death

Did i gaslight myself expecting things to go back to normal or am i being gaslit now that things inevitably will?

To me its all gone like i thought this in the first 2 parts but now Im being told noooo she doesn’t hate u

Even tho im blocked

Granted my friend had good advice, “just wait, until they miss you”

Which is ironic cause that was my advice lol she was like bitch u don’t remember what u told me? So she’s right how did i forget my own advice to her

Also i only fucked up cause my homie told me to hit her up, i swore not to, but was wrong but, he was 1 of 2 people who paid the price for my bullshit like he hated me for the same reason so i believed him

NOW EVERYONE INCLUDING HIM IS LIKE WHY DID U BELIEVE ME

Im like;_;💧💧💧💧 WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO!?!?!?!!!? U said reach out…now im blocked… idk what to do！

My friend said “why do you care she doesn’t fuck u?” But its never been about that

Idc were pretend girlfriends , i was just happy yk, so what we don’t kiss, & i always knew our sexual chemistry wasn’t gonna work

Now he says “my mistake” but were worse than before

It was just, fun, we pretended, we had so much fun

Our emotional connection eclipsed that everything sexual, it was just real connection

Then to just throw me away, so, quickly

& lose all my friends over this

Yeah i was belligerently drunk

OH AS IF MY HOMIE HER FUCKING EX WASNT THAT WAY SOOOOOOOOOOO MANY TIMES

But me I was so bad i ought to be cast aside?

When he does its fine

Everyone cares when i do it

oh lawd abandon her

My whole ass friend group disappeared ive been ostracized, when members of the group acted the same & WORSE i have cleaned up shit on my floor for these people ive nearly been kicked out of my house for these people

If my obscene blackout mistake where im begging & crying not to be abandoned which frankly, idk what to make of

Was the best to leave me forcibly? They took me with them & it only got worse

I begged & begged not to be alone even though people were with me?

Just tears & tears right? Endless fucking tears’ when

WHEN does it end, the tears, the pain

You would think by now im used to it right?

Why

Why does it hurt so bad ?

The autumn, THAT AUTUMN such disregard of me

To be cast away that many

How dare spring unjustly devour me like autumn

Have I not had not had enough

Is the the truth to love no one

Disregard my nature MY FUCKING PASSION just for once, in my, flash in the pan life, ….idk when ill die, im not passing, im a target, why not just fucking feel something forreal

Just, feel something, please, a moment of warmth with someone, its worth a life time, please, forget everything, just feel something in a moment with a human, simply a moment of warmth

You tell me a more validating existence of ur life than a moment with someone you love, just, show love

Otherwise she regardless can play girlfriends forever & hurt me like my exes

In the end

Its cause im not fucking passing so who tf cares

COUNT THEM AMONG THE MANY

Id say when will i be loved but truthfully

I love her more than my partner

I feel sick over such greed, im too ugly for who i covet & i feel too ugly for who i have

Simultaneously just a disgusting non passing piece of filth

The brick doesn’t know love in her face even though shhes been there

Pathetic

i can't be the only one who wants izuku to get fucking pissed at his situation, at all might, start questioning what the fuck is going on with OFA.

because if you're going to trust a fifteen year old with something like OFA and bind them to the life of a symbol, you do not get to withhold information. deku was not told he'd be dealing with an enemy like AFO when he got the quirk, nor was he told that basically its whole point was not fighting some vague concept of evil, but fighting a very tangible very dangerous villain. he wasn't told that up until all might, inheriting this power was guaranteed suicide, and even after all might you only have a vague chance of survival. to be offered such a life altering "gift", Izuku should have been warned of everything. from the start. and if not then then from the very moment izuku started seeing vestiges, or at least when AFO resurfaced. WHY IN GOD'S NAME WOULD YOU HIDE ANY, ANY BIT OF INFORMATION ON A QUIRK THAT IMPORTANT?????

no because, if you look at it cynically, All Might took this kid who had nothing and who looked up to him as effective god. He took this kid who he knew had no sense of no self-care or self-preservation. This extremely reckless kid who he saw putting his life at risk three times (sludge v1, hanging on to AM as he jumped, sludge v Katsuki) within 24 hours. He picked this kid who he knew would give everything (because Izuku had "nothing", and therefore nothing to lose) and "gifted" him with a ticking time bomb. Of course Izuku is willing to break himself if it means using OFA to max potential. So much of his self-worth is based on OFA. He's said time and time again he isn't sure if he deserves it, that it's a borrowed power. If you've taken this kid and given him everything practically overnight, of course he'll go to self-destructive lengths to prove himself worthy of it. Who'd want to go back to being nothing after all?

And this is a logical conclusion. Someone like Izuku, someone like All Might probably used to be in his youth and still kind of is, they're perfect to be put on this kind suicide mission. They're a perfect vessel. Sure they're heroic and brave and selfless, but most importantly they're willing to die for the cause. OFA the quirk knows this. Literally two seconds after Katsuki sacrifices himself telling Deku not to do shit alone, Deku renders said sacrifice useless by doing exactly what Katsuki warned him not to😭 And the quirk and vestiges encourage him. They don't give a shit about repercussions and Deku's chronic pain or possible arm paralysis. They just want to beat AFO. You go son you break those arms 🤠

Doesn't it all feel a little bit exploitative?

Look at it like this. A kid is born with no power. This kid wants to be great, but the world says he can't. He meets his hero, and the hero says he can't either. Then the kid acts heroic, but reckless. The hero sees an opening. This kid is good and doesn't care one bit about his well-being? Jackpot! He offers the kid a deal. Great power, an extraordinary gift at surface layer. But one with so many more hidden strings attached that hurt and break and haunt the kid, that he was never warned about or taught how to deal with. But he can always give it to someone else! Can he, really? Can he go back to being nothing? With a personality like his, well nope. And that's why you pick the overly selfless reckless ones. The ones that will feel indebted to you to a ridiculous degree.

Isn't it like dare I say... like a deal with the devil?

As we progress more and more into the lore of AFO and OFA, I can really see why Katsuki's started to view it as a cursed power. And with how wildly different from expectations (at least mine) + far more nuanced the Todofam drama has revealed itself to be compared to what it seemed upon first intro, I'm inclined to believe there's more to the OFA story than clean cut, young bro good guy vs mean big bro oppression.

TL;DR - All Might is the metaphorical devil jr who gave Izuku a passed down deal, and neither he nor broccoli boy read the fine print.

Bakugo’s ghost sent me this ask 💀

Lol but seriously, these are all excellent points and I’ve been sitting on this ask until I had time to answer it because you’re absolutely goddamn right

This shit is explotive af, and I’ve got a suspicion as to why

I don’t think Deku was a random choice, there’s a layer of fate/mystic woven into the bnha world that gets over looked.

Sir had insane fortune telling abilities that were never once wrong about anything except when it came to the 2 OFA users fates. Deku even specifically says he’ll smash any fate in his way, and I think on some level he knows he can because he has a different destiny.

The vestiges break him from Shinsos hold, meaning the can have some level of control over Dekus body. You think AM noticed every time something like that happened? AM didn’t even notice Bakugo internalizing all the blame for his retirement even after watching his mom force him to apologize for it??

“I keep forgetting that your still a child” AM, sir, this is the third time you’ve admitted out loud that you were just gonna let Bakugo suffer his own fate 💀 please stop indicting yourself and at least pretend you care about Bakugo outside his relationship to Deku jfc

Also what are the chances you get nine random holders and none of them turn out to be corrupt or at least too self serving to die for the cause??? Slimmer than the pages bnha is printed on.

There’s something pulling some strings here, and I think it’s the true power of First users quirk.

What would be the point of transferring a quirk if that’s it’s only power?

What would be the point of this quirk being essentially password locked?

What would be the point of this quirk being able to forced on to someone?

There’ wouldn’t be any.

But what if that’s not what the quirk is?

What if the quirk is actually passing something along, and that’s why it’s dna based, it’s the transfer of an integral part of them.

Something that would change a person if forced on them but would possibly eradicate someone if stolen. Something like a souls desire? That could be a dangerous thing to give to someone else especially if it’s something they didn’t want, now they suddenly have to?

Then you give this quirk a strength enhancing quirk?

Now it’s got some juice, how much stronger did it get? Can it sense others with a similar goal, can it make its host gravitate towards those people?

Is the firsts quirk purposely finding exploitable heros, like Nana AM and Deku. All people who were/are willing to give up everything for the cause. How much of the first is in there, how much sentient power does this quirk have?

We know that Nana gave up her family, her child, for the cause. AM never bothered cultivating a family and pushed away Sir and anyone else who is anti him dying, and now we’re seeing Deku do the same.

Deku who had no friends to begin with, a dad who’s out of the picture, and an already slightly strained relationship with his mom?

Is this quirk capable of learning? Does it know that having people you care about slows you down from sacrificing yourself?

Does this quirk compound with the other users goals make the drive stronger each time?

Idk but there’s a glimmer of hope that Deku isn’t doomed to be a glorified meat puppet, and it exists in the form of Kacchan.

No one else had someone so deeply rooted to them, who could fight right along side them. Bakugo is an outlier in this story, almost the exact opposite kind of hero OFA wants, his connection to Deku breaks the cycle.

Deku would never give up on Katsuki, and even if he tried Endeavor will start coughing up ice cubes before Bakugo lets him. He couldn’t leave Deku alone when he was convinced he hated him, there’s no way he’d do it now.

Dekus story will be different from the other users that’s for sure.

I'm sorry about your presentation, idk if your still doing hcs but can you do one where Reggie is julies older brother by 1 or 2 years and Julie in love with Luke and Luke likes her as well but neither will do anything because of Reggie. If not its ok. ☺

I brought up an idea similar to this a while back! But let’s rework it. 

In this scenario, let’s say that the Molinas and the Peters' have known each other for a long while, ever since Julie and Reggie were kids. They’ve pretty much grown up together. 

And then they get older and a lot of shit happens. Julie’s mom dies. And Reggie’s parents finally get a divorce. 

As the two families are healing and trying to move on, eventually Ray and Reggie’s mom sorta just clicked. 

And years later, they ended up getting married- officially making Reggie Julie’s brother. 

They move into the Molina’s house and they transition to one big family so seamlessly that Julie often forgets that Reggie isn’t her brother in the biological sense. He’s always been an older figure to her, always looking out for her and Carlos. 

She’s so used to having him around. And even used to having Reggie’s friends around growing up. 

They all met when they were in middle school, but Julie hasn’t seen them much over the years, only seeing them during special occasions or whenever she would go to the Peters’ from time to time. 

She remembers Alex, the shy blonde one who does his best to keep the peace when everyone got too rowdy. 

And then Bobby, who is just hitting his stride in his sullen, moody teenager phase. Still nice though. 

And Luke, the wild one. The guy was all long haired, energetic, and sporting some gnarly braces the last time she saw him. 

She hears a knock at the door the night Reggie and his mom had moved in. Julie opens it and it’s the boys: Alex, Bobby, and- woah. 

“Julie?” Luke smiles, his long hair cut to a still shaggy ‘do, braces gone, and now ripped, telling by how he’s proudly wearing his Nirvana cutoffs, “No way! Long time no see,” 

“Y-yeah,” Julie instantly wishes that she wasn’t wearing her dinosaur slippers at the moment. She leads them all inside, telling them to make themselves at home while they wait for Reggie to come down. 

Julie hurries off to her room, red in the face, internally freaking out about the idea of a cute guy coming over to her house on a regular basis. 

A cute guy she cannot get involved with... imagine how Reggie would react... 

The guys note the dreamlike expression on Luke’s face as he watched Julie go up the stairs. Once she’s gone, Luke whirls around, “Has she always been like that?” 

“Squirrely?” 

“No...” Luke drops his voice down to a whisper, “I mean, has she always been that cute?” 

Alex and Bobby shoots this idea down real quick, “Woah! No no no! Off-limits! She's off-limits, Luke!” 

“How come?” 

“She’s Reggie’s sister,” 

“Step-sister,” 

“Still,” Bobby cuts in, “You know Reggie. He takes the brother role very seriously. He won’t let you stand a foot away from her if he heard what you just said.” 

“If who heard what?” Reggie says, coming down the stairs. 

“Nothing!” They all exclaim, and Luke silently thanks the boys for not ratting him out and invoking Reggie’s wrath. 

He does know how Reggie can get when it comes to Julie. He’s already so protective of her. So he’s not going to try and do anything to piss him off. 

And besides, he just finds her cute. It’s not like anything’s gonna come from it. 

Wrong. 

Luke and Julie are hardcore pining for each other the more time the boys spend over at the house. 

And they’re over a lot. 

Julie would come into the garage, now a studio space for the boys’ band, and watches them practice. 

Somehow Luke finds a way to gravitate towards her. Always standing beside her, ready to show a song he’s been working on or just ask how she’s doing. 

And Julie would find an excuse to hang around the boys, whether offering to help with songwriting or help clean up the equipment. One time, she hands Luke his guitar and their hands met. They both blush but quickly part before Reggie could see what transpired. 

They sneak little casual touches here and there, both to gauge if the other person reciprocates their feelings and to hide whatever was going on between them from Reggie. 

This all coming from the fear of Reggie flipping out on them. 

Apparently when the boys bring up Nick from Julie’s class, joking about the way he was starry-eyed when dancing with Julie (secretly trying to get a rise out of Luke), Reggie immediately asks Julie about a thousand questions: 

“Who is he? What does he do?” 

“Do? He’s a student. In my grade...” 

“Oh. No job? So he’s a deadbeat, huh? Doesn’t sound like a suitable match,” 

“What are you going on about?”

“Does he like the Star Wars Prequels? Yes or No? There is a right answer” 

“What does this have to do with anything, Reggie?”

“I need to know if he’s good enough for you!” 

Reggie starts watching Nick like a hawk at school, going out of his way to intimidate the junior (well as much as he could. he’s still pretty much a puppy and super non-threatening). 

It’s getting ridiculous. 

So Julie goes to talk to Luke, to try and nip this in the bud before Reggie notices their weird behavior. She manages to play off needing help to get something in the laundry room to get him alone without suspicion. 

“Look, we can’t do this anymore... whatever this is,” 

Luke nods, “Agreed. Reggie’s my best friend.” 

“And he’s my brother,” 

“I don’t want to do something that would upset him,” 

“Me neither. Glad we’re on the same page,” 

“Right. Same page. So just friends. Deal?” she sticks her hand out. 

He shakes it, “Deal,” 

They lock eyes, appreciating how the other one looks under the warm dimmed light. 

It takes only about .5 seconds for them to crash their lips onto each other’s, igniting a full on make out session. And by the time they finished, they realize their mistake. 

Uh oh. 

They can’t go back after this. 

Now they really have something to hide from Reggie. 

They sneak around the house, whenever they could. 

Luke would make up an excuse to grab water or go to the bathroom in the middle of rehearsal, just to sneak up to Julie’s room to grab a quick kiss and maybe a small tickle fight just so he could hear that laugh he loves so much. 

And Julie would join the boys at the dinner table, sitting next to him and discreetly slipping cue love notes into his pocket that she knows would make him blush and smile all goofily later (and if they turn into potential song lyrics? Well that's for them to know).

Alex warns Luke the next day, “I think he’s catching on. Be more careful,” 

They spend more time together now that Julie starts writing songs for the band. Her and Luke would huddle over the piano, scribbling the night away, always sitting dangerously close to each other.

Once, Reggie observes them quietly from the couch with an unreadable expression on bis face.

“We are careful,” 

Bobby raises an eyebrow at him, “Really? You tried to pass off the hickeys on Julie’s neck as rashes.” 

“And Reggie bought it, remember? He went out and got ointment for her and everything,” 

“He’s not stupid, Luke. You better do something about this. Fast,” 

Luke sighs, “You’re right.” 

Later that night, Luke pulls Julie into the upstairs bathroom, the one between her room and Reggie’s, to talk. 

“Jules, as much I want to keep doing this... I can’t stand lying to Reggie,” 

“Me too,” she says, “So, let’s just tell him. I don’t like hiding you.” 

“But we need to plan it out. We can’t just spring it on him,” 

“Catch him in a good mood hopefully, and we’ll tell him together,” 

“Sounds like a plan, boss,” 

“Love it when you call me boss,” Julie smiles, angling her head up to kiss him. 

Just then, the door connecting to Reggie’s room bursts open and the said bassist enters in his bathrobe. His eyes grow wide at the sight of them tangled up in each other. 

“What is going on here?” 

The couple breaks apart. Julie and Luke jump to opposite sides of the bathroom, hands up in surrender. 

“You didn’t lock the doors?” Julie hisses at Luke

“Was not my main priority!” Then Luke steps forward in an attempt to calm Reggie down, “Hey, Reg, pal, um, what you just saw-” 

“You guys were kissing in here?” he yells. 

Julie and Luke lower their heads, “...yeah,” 

Reggie sighs, throwing his hands up in the air, “Unbelievable!”

“Reggie, we’re sorry-” 

“In the bathroom, really? Can’t you guys do this in the laundry room like you usually do? My toothbrush is here, come on!”  

Wait. What?

Did they hear him correctly? 

“You knew?!” Julie all but screamed at her brother. 

“Duh. You’re not really subtle,” 

Luke splutters, “B-But Nick-” 

“Found out real quick that he’s not the one I should be worried about,”

“And the... the, well..?”  Julie gestures lamely at her neck, “Why did you get me ointment?” 

Reggie smirks, “Just to mess with you.” 

“So... you’re not mad?”

“Nah. Like I said. I need to make sure whatever guy you end up with, Jules, is good enough for you. And, well, I’ve known Luke almost all my life. And I trust him. Honestly, there’s no other guy I could think of that could be a better match for you.” 

Luke’s hand rests on his shoulder, “You mean that, Reg?” 

“Of course. I’m happy for you guys. But uh...” he sticks his thumb towards the door, “Could you like skip on out of here. I did come to the bathroom for a reason.” 

“Oh, right,” 

“Your Tia’s chicken went right through me-” 

“Ok, Reggie! We’re leaving!” 

“But one more thing,” 

Luke and Julie stop in the doorway leading to the hallway. 

“If you think I’m bad,” Reggie shakes his head, “Try breaking the news to Carlos,” 

Luke pales, “Oh no,”

“’Oh no’ is right,” 

The couple spins around to find Carlos in the hallway, arms crossed, staring them down, “Care to explain why you two were in the bathroom?”

“Well, uh, um, we were-” Luke turns to Julie, but the girl is nowhere to be found, having already yeeted to her room to escape an overprotective Carlos. 

Luke throws a pleading look at Reggie, “A little help here, buddy?”  

Meanwhile, Carlos is unamused, carrying so much tension in his small body that it has Luke gulping nervously. 

“Nope you’re on your own,” he winks, “Make sure to tell him about the ‘rash’ while you’re at it.”

And with a laugh, the bathroom door closes. 

“I can explain...” 

Ok all I wanted was to laugh about John getting curb stomped but the Ayo tag is a fucking nightmare like wow

Disclaimer I have shit memory so if I say something that doesn’t add up fact wise let me know. But I’m pissed off so here we go-

(FYI all of your opinions should be kept to yourself, so don’t comment if you fail to read my entire post so thanks)

I know this has been discussed, but there are things that have been left out of the argument, or hasn’t even been considered when it comes to the big I speak no I see no I hear no evil scene y’all making it out to be of Ayo disarming Bucky. So gather around here’s the part where you hear me out without scrolling off regardless of your stance on the situation, because I’m here for all opinions afterwards.

First off I can’t even understand why this is controversial at all considering the history that led to this moment. Oh wait I lied it’s literally because either you have your head to far up Bucky’s ass or because he’s a man or because he’s white, or because *ding ding ding * all of the above. And now you’re mad because how dare this black bitch have the nerve-the audacity to do that to poor little old Bucky (now insert the part where you either scroll off, or put your two unwanted cents in before I finish). And this is where you all want to use the empty ass belief that ThE aRm Is A gIfT, or empty ass excuse tHaT’s HiS aRm. Also someone else pointed out well if they didn’t trust him than they shouldn’t have given it to him in the first place. Which yes all are true, but also not at the same time. *Gasp* yes somethings can not be one or other, because ✨ grey area ✨.

Now I don’t know what world you’re living in where you think a gift can not be taken back, and I use the term gift loosely because you can’t even call it that honestly. Because in reality the whole reason he has the arm in the first place is because he needed a new one for infinity war like duh, why have crap heap that’s easily damageable when they can make an indestructible one, to live or not to live like it’s not a hard choice. Then he disappeared for five years so it would be kinda difficult to get an arm back that doesn’t exist anymore. But by the time everyone came back I think an arm was at the bottom of their to do list, or not to mention the fact well it’s already been made, and you probably don’t know how to properly function without both arms yet and can’t afford a normal one yourself so why not just keep it instead of wasting all the time, effort, and resources of making it, but idk I guess that’s a stretch. But since people likes using the gift excuse guess what, a gift is just something you couldn’t afford to do yourself so someone else was kind enough to do it for you (^^^), but in every other since of the word it really belongs to them not you. So let’s give an example shall we, now your parent(s) gave you something you wanted (shit someone else may have bought it for you) but you fucked around and got in trouble and now you’re grounded. Now depending on your parent(s) you’ll either get your ass beat or your shit will get confiscated, or both if you fuck up enough. Now do you think you have any right to say what they can or can’t do? -Yeah I didn’t think so and if you thought otherwise well here comes round two of another ass whopping or the first one if you’re lucky. Or on rare occasions some (white) kids don’t get physically disciplined, but you’re still going to pay the price regardless.

So same situation (yes I know I can’t compare an amputees arm to an object, but I only say that because Bucky is more than that, more than just a arm) but also very much not because in Bucky’s and Ayo’s situation it is much-MUCH worse obviously, but apparently it’s not obvious considering that there’s a debate in the first place. Or in other words you think Bucky’s feelings-FEELINGS are more important then Ayo’s and Wakanda the truth. Which is you’re lucky that it was only his feelings that got hurt, because she (and Yama) could have killed him and everyone else in that room easily so let’s all thank Ayo (and Yama) for her kindness and mercy first and foremost, also for not taking back both the arm and the shield completely. Because that arm and shield is Wakandan property ok so let’s get that straight, so she had every right to take it if she wanted to-whenever or wherever (which also falls into the part where the Dora does has jurisdiction there, and almost anywhere else since most likely every country wants or have vibranium now, and because Wakanda could literally flatten the whole world so yeah they’re going to have a legal pass because who’s gonna want to fuck with them) but she didn’t key word didn’t which should’ve been a clue they would never take the arm or shield back because he is disabled considering even after what Bucky (& John) did.

Not only is it the property of Wakanda but it’s from the only place that was willing, and did help Bucky in every way a person could be helped literally saving this man physically, mentally, and emotionally- like please. Specifically the royal family themselves firsthand which need I remind you is related to the former King that was killed by the man that Bucky escaped from prison without discussing it with them first. That same King, family, and country that Ayo is from, loves, and is to serve and protect. That she will-IS sacrificing and dedicates her life to...she failed them all-failed herself when T’Chaka was murdered like bruh- like that should speak for it self like that is the ultimate betrayal like he literally spat in their fucking face, especially Ayo’s considering she’s the one who gave Bucky back his mind, his freedom and after all that after everything they did for him they still didn’t trust him, and betrayed him by not telling him he had a fail safe in his arm?! Yeah-no big sike, anyone with a brain knows prosthetics because here’s the real kicker ITS NOT HIS ARM thus it’s O M G...removable. Yes you read that correctly r-e-m-o-v-a-b-l-e. Now put that together with the fact that Ayo is highly skilled and an overall badass I don’t think it would be that hard for her to fucking figure out how to dislocate it with a few pressure points considering that’s literally the whole point of striking a pressure point (if he still had his arm then that hit would’ve stopped it from working, but since it’s fake that mf popped right off). Pressure points are used to disable someone, thus Ayo disabling a disabled by disarming his arm to deescalate the situation go figure. It wasn’t a fail safe it’s just skill and common sense that everyone failed to have in the moment and used as a last resort because oh no Bucky’s face, like boo fucking hoo he did it to himself by breaking their trust first, and defending that bitch. Instead of him waiting for the Dora to have Zemo in custody first, what did Bucky do instead? He had the fucking audacity (and that’s how you use the word) to use that same arm against Ayo, against Wakanda. That speaks volumes considering out of respect as a friend or whatever close bond they have (because they definitely have a connection after what they went through together) Ayo still gave him a warning, and time to do what he had to do before they came for Zemo’s ass. Let it be known she didn’t have to do that at all because her loyalty is to and should be to her country first but in those eight hours it wasn’t, it was in the trust of their friendship so therefore she literally was endangering her well being by giving Bucky just that courtesy, and I don’t think you all consider her position in that predicament and thanks to Bucky she could’ve gotten her status revoked, thrown in jail, or worse killed for disobeying orders because let’s not forget Chadwick unfortunately has passed away, and thus it’s a fact that T’Challa is no longer in charge since Marvel will respect that with tampering with his character, so I don’t want to hear she would’ve been just fine because we’ve seen how the royal counsel has a big say on what goes and doesn’t go considering they did not give a single fuck about their own next of kin, Erik who has every right as them, but would have easily killed him just because he was an ‘outsider’ if T’Challa didn’t speak up for him (I mean they abandoned him while leaving him to fend for himself, killed his father and covered it up so wouldn’t put it past them). So if you think when Ayo fucked up again about retrieving Zemo because she trusted, and helped this outsider over her own kind she definitely would’ve been considered a traitor and be punished for her actions.

Can you imagine the hurt, and betrayal they felt? No apparently not, because it’s all about how he’s disabled and how could she take his arm (like uh she literally left it, and the shield for them to keep, and it’s not like he would’ve died without it to begin with unlike Bucky who was willing to sacrifice Ayo’s entire livelihood) when the fact that disabled people say constantly for others to stop putting their disabilities before them, and how they’re just as capable as everyone else. “They are a someone with a disability, not someone who is disabled,” which is absolutely true, because they’re more than that but everyone seems to forget that all of sudden when Ayo detaches Bucky’s arm (I wonder why) and all of sudden he doesn’t have control of his own body like what- he literally used his entire body nonbrainwashed to stab them in the back like miss me with that bs. Him spending five seconds without his arm doesn’t compare especially since they forgave him without even at least an apology at that.

Detaching his arm was a warning that he needed to learn, because they were letting him know, and I emphasize that that arm does not belong to him so how he dare try to use it against the people who gave it to him after they fed, housed, and freed him when no one else could, or would when he’s done nothing in return while as a repayment was being a fucking ingrate. All the while facing no consequences, not even the need for a fucking bandaid *mic drop*.

HUGE SHOUTOUT TO THE PERSON WHO LEFT AN ESSAY ON BELAJO IN THE COMMENT SECTION OF MY UQUIZ. anyways please click readmore if you want to read something that almost brought me to tears. This person is astounding I'm blown away they’re galaxy braining.

anyway so belajo is something that is actually so special to me because we all saw that weird romance plot the writers tried to force on jo and dean right??? we all saw that and felt icky about it??? moving on, we also know bela was a dean mirror. SO okay the reason dean and jo felt so forced and icky and weird I think (besides the actors having NO romantic chemistry) is because jo is a lesbian. LMAO no but fr fr dean always kinda treated jo like a little sister because he had a little brother and it’s the Eldest Daughter Burden Syndrome in him to do so I think. where dean and bela differ is that bela only raised herself, whereas dean helped raise sam, so bela is used to being dangerous and independent etc. without it affecting anyone but herself MEANING where dean tried to baby jo (because she was a girl ((gotta love early spn))? because she was ellen’s kid? because she was new in the hunting world? idk but he felt responsible for her one way or another) bela wouldn’t. SO BASICALLY belajo would be everything deanjo tried to be. both people rough around the edges, self destructive, but where one has too much freedom and a level of confidence that only looks deep from the surface, the other hardly has ANY freedom (or so she thinks because ellen is protective) and confidence that is honestly kind of unfounded for how new she seemed to be at hunting. jo would obviously be game for all of bela’s ridiculous plans and bela wouldn’t patronize jo, rather give her important roles in the plans she makes. my guess is that jo would run into bela on a hunt and they’d butt heads a little bit because O K they’re both stubborn and snarky but they’d end up having to work together and they’d surprise themselves with how good of a team they were making (they wouldn’t say anything at first about it). at the end of the hunt or whatever jo would be the one to give bela her cell number (“incase you find yourself in deep shit again”) and they’d go on with their lives. bela holds onto the number but doesn’t put it in her phone. she doesn’t call either. the next time they see each other it’s another situation where they just happen to be in the same place at the same time. jo is working on a cursed item hunt or something IDFK and bela wants the item to sell or whatever. they’re at some fancy dinner party and bela’s like “you again? can’t get enough, huh?” or something idk sorry I’m literally typing an essay. ANYWAY they work the case exchanging snarky one liners except this one gets intense and it’s one of those Saved At The Last Minute deals. it’s probably bela that goes “guess we make a pretty good team, huh?” and this time they don’t part ways. they get a hotel room together (“I saved your life TWICE! damn right it’s your treat”) and sleep in separate beds it’s all very normal and whatnot because I am a slut for slow burn and it’s ME who is holding YOU captive and making you read my belajo essay so it goes how I say it goes. anyway when they part ways in the morning bela is all blushy and this time it’s Jo with the snarky flirty remarks. bela finally calls jo one day about three weeks later or something (she still doesn’t make jo a contact, and in fact makes a point of fishing her number out of her purse and typing it in her phone every time she needs to call after that) and they work another case together. they work more and more cases together until they literally are just sharing a car looking at each other and going “what’s next?” bela doesn’t tell jo about her demon deal. she almost forgot about it herself, what with the craze of the cases and adrenaline that having a partner in crime comes with. but she doesn’t forget. and she doesn’t say anything either. jo has fully warmed up to bela at this point, all her snarky remarks now tinged with something of adoration. bela’s even met ellen (who took her in immediately, much to jo’s surprise) and ash (who takes a little longer to warm up to her because bela is bela lmao)! jo’s never felt so alive. and it’s not just the adrenaline—it’s bela, who makes her feel like she’s worth something, who she watched shoot out the tires of some guy’s car because she didn’t like the way he was talking to jo (which normally jo would find possessive but something about the way bela did it made her feel safe), who tells jo one night after celebratory drinks that she’s beautiful, and jo’s stomach flips. because when she talks to bela, bela LISTENS. and bela is funny. and smart—UGH SO SMART. and surprisingly handy with a knife. and maybe just a little bit beautiful too. amazing, jo thinks. bela is amazing. and she says so, too, one evening. they’re planning their next move. it’s sticky and convoluted and seemingly impossible until they make a breakthrough. it’s bela that connects the final piece, and she gets that look on her face that says she’s equal parts bewildered and ecstatic. jo says it then—“you’re amazing—“ and it’s the way she says it that makes bela stop in her tracks. the smile melts off her face and she starts shaking her head. she tells jo about the deal then. she has only what like three months left at this point. jo is PISSED. P I S S E D. she leaves bela crying on the bed in the motel room to go for a walk and cool down. it’s pretty intense lmao. she realizes then that she loves her and that’s a terrible terrible terrible feeling. bela is asleep when she gets back to the room. oh god I’ve gotten to the part where it’s only half rendered in my mind but basically blah blah blah jo has ellen and ash and every other hunter she knows looking high and low for ways to save bela. as her time gets shorter and shorter bela gets more and more impulsive and dangerous (“why not? I’m going to hell anyway! I won’t even be around for the consequences :)”) and jo gets more and more frustrated. they have another fight where jo confesses that she can’t lose bela and bela says something along the lines of “you never had me! I was using you the whole time” or something, you know, like a LIAR, and jo tells bela to fuck off, bonus points for an “I hate you,” you know, liKe a LiAr, and she leaves. little does jo know that that would be the last conversation she has with bela before she’s dragged to hell. and of course, it’s jo that finds her in ribbons, a red and white tapestry of blood against the expensive hotel carpet, underneath the chandelier, eyes blown open and limbs splayed out beside her. she was on her way back from the bar, where she walked to with plans to go home with someone else, drink her worries away, etc I guess lmao but she was too nauseous to even go in so she just circled the block a few times before heading back to their room. she opens the door with shaky hands, blinking away the last of her tears, and fully intending to apologize, take it all back, tell her she loved her. instead, well. you know. anyway so OBVIOUSLY bela comes back. idk how but she does she HAS to because I need a happy or bittersweet ending or whatever but yeah I haven’t even placed the next pieces yet. they change each other for the better obviously too. bela allows herself to be vulnerable and heals through some of her trauma and jo grows as a hunter and strategist, and understands more of what it’s like to be protective over someone. even ellen grows to trust jo more on her own especially with bela, who ellen (who is definitely is NOT someone to dote but) grows more and more fond of. it’s found family. it’s hesitant allies to hesitant friends to best friends to widow to awkward I-can’t-believe-you’re-back-I-don’t-know-what’s-allowed to best friends again to LOVERS awwwwwwwwwww

Episode 19 thoughts

- I love the boys vs. girls scenes! The similarly layered conversations that occur are an absolute delite to watch!

- Engin making Serkan PANIC over Eda finding another man! Like he really didn’t think so until at this point! But also, Melo trying to make her eniste really panic!

- Selin really trying to play house with Serkan.... *eye roll*

- Their individual monologues caused me pain. They want each other so bad. To only be each other’s. To only look and smile at each other. And yet, those words only remain in their hearts, unable to find escape into this world, held back by the circumstances they are currently entangled in. As true and bright as the day but hidden in the darkness of the night deep within their hearts.

- AIDAN PLAYING CUPID FOR EDSER? I begged for this and I’m actually receiving it? I’m shook.

- Ferit suspecting Efe? I was taken back by it, didn’t see that coming!

- KIDS IN LOVE, they are literal children in love! Their sarcastic responses give me life!

- The tension at that breakfast table would cause me so much anxiety!

- HE CUT THE BREAD FOR HER OUT OF HABIT....I literally can’t deal with them! They cause me too much pain!

- He’s gonna name that horse Eda. I just know it. And I’m gonna fall to pieces.

- My heart broke for Aidan after listening to the story. Her guilt toward the loss of her elder son was so strong and powerful that it caged her in her home. A mother’s pain is incomparable. It’s understandable how Aidan may have blamed herself for being missing in her son’s life and why she tries to be involved in Serkan’s. She wants to be involved and stay connected with her Serkan in a way she wasn’t able to for his brother. But by sending Serkan away at a young age by himself, she distanced herself from him. It’s not his fault he doesn’t trust anyone because the two people who he was supposed to trust in life abandoned him in trying to deal with their own pain while neglecting his needs. I’m not blaming Aidan/Alptekin because it’s his easy to judge from the outside. It’s such a deep and realistic way that these characters represent the dynamics and struggles of a traumatic event and the aftermath. Serkan’s inability to trust and fear of abandonment is real and justified based on his past. Aidan’s fear of leaving the house is justified due to the circumstances in which Alp died. Alptekin’s strictness toward Serkan can be explained by the fact that he lost his elder son (who he clearly named after himself) due to an illness and he fears he might lose Serkan too. Which also makes me think, did Serkan really have an illness in the past? I means he’s a bit of a hypochondriac but I’m thinking maybe just because of his brothers illness, Serkan got conditioned to thinking and living a certain healthy way to protect himself.

- I’m glad Aidan told Eda this because I think it might make Eda open her eyes a bit more. I’m not expecting Eda to forgive and forget but I think it might explain to her why Serkan is the way he is.

- If you ask me, Serkan was pretty fair in asking Efe to claim his mistake in front of the team. Serkan built and has lead this team to such a great standard and Efe ruined that in minutes. They rightfully deserved an apology. And Engin being pissed and backing up Serkan as the BEST FRIEND HE IS.

- Serkan being honest about his feelings and wanting to improve things with Eda was such a good thing to see. It may have taken him some time to get there but I’m glad that he’s come to terms with the fact that he can’t be without her. More so, he doesn’t want her to be with anyone else. Serkan is hopeful about their relationship and I think that’s the first time since their breakup. He isn’t trying to convince himself or anyone that they are over with completely. And I think what Engin said really resonated with him. If they can overcome the truth, it’s true love. If not, it’s over.

- His seriousness went out the window as soon as he realized the flowers were for Eda, HAHAHAH! He said burn the flowers! He’s such an idiot

- HE REALLY DRAGGED HER FROM THE CHAIR, I’M DEAD! freaking children behavior!

- Serkan is really trying to keep the truth from reaching Eda from anyone but him but everything really seems to be going against him! Let me tell you, my heart broke when Serkan mentioned his fathers mistake taking away Eda from him. He cannot catch a break!

- Aidan burning Alptekin’s clothes was so funny!

- Why is Selin trying to dig! Let my man Serkan handle this!

- Efe doesn’t know.... did I read that scene right?

- He’s gonna record their conversation! EFE, YOU SNAKE!

- SO IT IS THE GRANDMOTHER AMD SHE DID SENT EFE FOR REVENGE. But it seems like she wasn’t sure but sent Efe to investigate. She’s gonna use that recording to kill Serkan’s career! IT IS GOING TO BE NON-STOP DRAMA.

- Eda making Serkan jealous like that was hilarious! She really created a whole jealousy scene with that man!

- Eda and Aidan play off each other so well at this dinner, it’s hilarious! The way they are setting these ladies straight!

- The way his eyes lit up when she said she’s in love with him still! It’s like he can’t actually believe that! Idk but I found it weird how Eda didn’t want to even listen to Serkan as he tried to talk to her. I mean up until now, all she’s wanted is for him to talk and open up and now that he’s spent the whole day trying to do so, she just ignored his calls or runs away when the opportunity is there. It’s so not like Eda! I get that she’s given him chances before and he’s missed them and she probably doesn’t want to waste any more time giving him empty chances but I feel like Eda used to understand Serkan’s tone and words but it’s like... she just doesn’t recognize in his tone how much he really wants to talk to her. It seems like a character downplay to me for Eda.

- I’m not that invested in Ferit/Ceren, but that was cute, mostly because I want Ceren to be happy! But I swear, this whole Selin/Ferit crap ruins everything! My girl Ceren deserves better!

- He loves her so much, he’s just playing along with her! He’s so in love with her!he really just said have fun, but don’t dance with anyone! And THAT CONFESSION. He said everything with his whole chest. And she didn’t hear! They will be the death of me!

- He took the bottle! Lol bruh, you gonna need at least 2 bottles to get over this mess!

- Selin really trying to come on to Serkan while he’s drunk and he just straight up says, I need Eda. How does she not get the message!

- YES CEREN! YOU TELL HIM GIRL! I mean for real, what did he expect! But I will say I appreciate that Ferit was honest and didn’t lead Ceren on any further and just came out with it.

- HE IS SO DRUNK, I LOVE IT! Eda is fascinated by his drunk state, he’s so cute, she can’t help but melt! That was such a cute way of involving the title of the show! And that scene is sooo cute!

- Her carrying him up the stairs and complaining that he’s heavy. Him being wasted out of his mind and saying off the wall stuff. I LIVED FOR THIS SCENE. PURE COMDEY. PURE EDSER. I WANT MORE.

- THE SHOWER SCENE. That’s it? That’s all we get? I’M SOOO PISSED! The trailer made it seem like such a scene and then they give us this? The frack? That is unacceptable! That was such a wasted opportunity! THEY WOULD’VE KILLED THAT SCENE! AND HONESTLY IT WOULD’VE SAVED THE EPISODE! Ughhhhhhhhhh

- AHHHH SHIT! She got her hands on Eda’s family, that’s it. It’s over.

- See what I mean. Somehow, Eda didn’t understand Serkan. Serkan never really had a good way of putting with words but Eda understood and didn’t completely twist it around. I honestly think Eda’s jealousy of Selin really makes her so paranoid that she’s able to twist around to justify her insecurity in regards to Selin. Which I just don’t get. I mean Eda did have that kind of dynamic with Selin but she was never super jealous or anything. She always had a way fighting back against Selin and still being confident. I just can’t seem to understand where all of the sudden, it’s turned into this.

- It’s out. The secret is out. But definitely not how it should have been. It should not have been from Selin. Selin seems remorseful about it but I don’t buy it. And Serkan looks like his whole world just shattered. And bless Eda. She’s about to really go through it. The last scene was sooooo well acted! I loved the tension, the angst, the anger!

- One thing that I really need to see happen is Eda/Serkan working on their communication skills. Because they suck at it. They are both indirect and never really say what they want and mean straight up. Since the beginning both of them expect each other to understand with signs or by indirect words and it was cute at first but now it’s annoying. Like two people in love should be able to tell each other anything and SHOULD tell each other everything as it is, free from judgement. I don’t want an argument and then they make up in one of their houses. I want them to talk out their issues, their perspectives! Because both of them have quite opposite views and beliefs so it’s very important for them to say everything out loud to each other. Otherwise, their chemistry and relationship is just gonna be for a show and not hold real value and show and realistic aspect to it.

Overall: A really good episode even though some parts did feel lagged. So the big explosion (one of them) has happened. Now we wait to see the aftermath. Honestly at first I used to think that I would know how certain characters would react but now I don’t know. It’s not easy to say where they will take the characters or the storyline so we’ll see! Tbh, Hande and Kerem are really carrying this show with their scenes and acting so I would love to see them get justice with their scenes! The show at some parts feels like random and misplaced but it’s still enjoyable! Like there’s no need for all these side character storylines right now, like give Eda/Serkan their full scenes in full cut and let it play out! Once everything is more wrapped up, you can add the side storylines! It’s still an enjoyable and fun show and definitely makes me laugh and keep me on the edge of my seat but there’s just some moments when the magic seems missing!

Can you write more about alpha Sander and him being friends with Senne? 

please write more of the abo au, im obsessed with the whole robbe/sander/britt. Like maybe a moment where robbe feels pushed over the edge? like he cant take anymore that sander doesnt choose him alone?

you could add Sander ending Britt and she for revenge looks for Sander again making Robbe see them making them separate, but then reconsider and come back.

Part 3 or 4, idk

Sander is not a good person. He cares deeply for Robbe, maybe he was impulsive when he bit him, but he doesn’t regret it for one second, Robbe is and will always be the one. The thing is: Sander sometimes likes to make dumb, dumb decisions based on nothing but his instant needs.

He needs to settle down already or to take it easy, but then he’s at a party, and Britt is constantly all over him, waiting for him to do something about it and they’ve been drinking together for a few hours, talking and flirting. And Sander is really not trying, but it’s just natural. Before he can think he’s already falling for the flirting game that Britt taught him to be a master in.

Like always, they end up stumbling their way to the second floor of Senne’s place, Sander touching the wall behind Britt until he finds an unlocked door that he opens and pushes her inside, locking the door behind him, quickly getting rid of his clothes with her help.

-

Robbe is not answering his texts or calls. Sander tries not to worry, but with every minute without an answer, he starts to get even more anxious. Why is it always like this with them?

Things with Britt were different last time. His body is still sore from all the scratching and for how long they went, so many rounds Sander lost count. Sander knows her well and she was very vocal about what she wanted, but that he can’t give her.

Sander doesn’t plan on being a dad any time soon. And when he said it was just goodbye sex, she was pissed. Britt is also really bad at hiding her emotions and Sander knew a thunderstorm was coming his way when he didn’t do as she wanted, but he was determined to stay as far away as possible from Britt from now on. For his sake and for Robbe’s, but it was too late.

Robbe knows about what happened, Sander feels it like it’s his own emotions. This is the worst part about being connected to Robbe: he knows the pain he not so accidentally caused.

He wasn’t planning on telling Robbe, even if it’s hard these days to keep any type of secret between them. Even though they’re in love, Sander doesn’t feel like he needs to tell his every action. Robbe knows how he is, this shouldn’t be a surprise. They’re young and have their entire lives to be together, Robbe is living his life too.

Please, Robbe, just pick up your fucking phone. Please?

Sander sighs, hanging up without being able to reach Robbe again. He almost goes to Britt’s place, asking nicely for her to stay away from Robbe, but there’s no point in that. The damage is already done. Sander knows she went to Robbe to try and ruin what they have.

-

Robbe is at his place, Sander can smell him, almost sure he’s right behind the door, choosing not to open it, but Sander needs to talk to him, so he knocks again, inhaling sharply, not totally comfortable in forcing Robbe to do things he doesn’t want to, but he won’t go home before they talk.

“Robbe, open the door.” He takes his hands off the door when he hears Robbe unlocking it, opening against his will, just because Sander said he had to.

“What are you doing here?”

Sander feels all his insides writhe as he sees Robbe after a few days. His eyes are red and swollen from crying, talking with a choked voice. “Robbe, you know that’s what she wants, that’s why she came here to tell you everything. You’re giving her exactly what she wants!”

“You? Yeah, she can have it. I’m not willing to waste my life for your love.” Robbe tries to walk away, but Sander holds his hand, keeping him close.

“You know you don’t mean that. I’m yours and you’re mine.” Sander puts his other hand on Robbe’s chest, where he feels the scar he left months and months ago. Not as a threat, but as a reminder that nobody else has this, they’re different.

“Why are you still fucking her then?” Sander sighs loudly, stepping back, still holding Robbe by his fingertips.

“Because! Robbe, we’re so fucking young. Do you really want to spend 50, 60 years just with me? Not knowing anyone else? Not living your youth because you’re stuck with me? You’re even younger, needs to live your life, we’re gonna be together in the end, no matter what.”

Robbe snorts, stepping back, shaking his head. “This is so much bullshit! What kind of thought is that? I don’t want just the end, I want all of it.”

Sander tries to think about what to say, but he just stutters, trying to understand what kind of feeling Robbe brings out of him. He’s never seen Robbe like this, so serious and hurt, and because of him. He never felt like this before, Sander doesn’t even know what this is.

Robbe looks down and Sander’s anxiety starts to get the best of him, making his ears ring. “Is it true that you breeded her?”

“What? No! Of course not!” Robbe is instantly relieved, but not at all happy yet and Sander just wants them to be ok. “We had sex, Robbe, that was it. I used a condom, I’m not that dumb.”

Robbe quietly pulls his hand away, walking to his kitchen in silence.

They’ve been playing this game of push and pull for too long, over a year and they went through some crazy times. Sander’s life changed a lot because of Robbe and their relationship. Anyone before and after Robbe was just fun, just a way to put his energy out, Senne went from a threat to his closest friend, knowing too much about Sander’s feelings for Robbe because, apparently, their smells are constantly mixed nowadays.

Only when he gets to the kitchen that he smells the pasta that Robbe was making, putting spices and cheese inside the pan, stirring a little too quickly. Sander walks carefully to him, resting his forehead against the back of Robbe’s head, pressing his nose against the nape of his neck.

“I’m sorry again. Always.” He whispers, trying to calm his breaths, closing his eyes and just enjoying being this close to Robbe, smelling his every emotion, even the bad ones. Sander will gladly accept all of them.

“I’m tired of your excuses.”

“I know.” Sander thinks that he can’t risk this, to hurt Robbe so much he gives up eventually. “Do you want me to stop? I won’t kiss anyone else, have sex with anyone else but you.”

Robbe stops stirring his pasta, looking over his shoulder after a second. Sander knows he’s offering a promise that’s hard for him to keep, but he’s more than willing to try if that makes Robbe happy.

“Would you?” He raises his eyebrows, turning his body slowly to face Sander, making him step back, already rethinking his words. “Not even flirting with people?”

Sander huffs a laughter, looking into Robbe’s eyes. “If that’s what you want, yes.”

Robbe’s excitement fades away a little bit and he sighs, shaking his head. “It’s not me who needs to want this, Sander.”

Sander steps back, not knowing what else to say or do to make Robbe believe him. “Fuck, Robbe…I know! Just give me something to work with.”

He thinks for a second, meeting Sander’s eyes again as he answers, “Yes. I want that.”

“So consider it done.” Robbe raises his eyebrows, his cheeks slowly turning a soft pink, his inside getting warmer, softer and Sander laughs, quietly coming closer again. Robbe and his feelings have just that much power over him. “Now, we can forget about the rest of the world and maybe eat something?”

August 4: Orphan Black 1x08

Very long, hard, emotionally draining day today. Everything at work pissed me off and I think I... I think I blew things out of proportion in my own head because I was too tired and hadn’t slept enough, anyway. On the other hand, it was also the kind of day where my computer straight up did a random, mandatory restart at, like, 11:30 in the morning when I had 50 programs open was and was right in the middle of a task, which is, like, comically stupid in terms of annoying things that might happen when you’re already pissed off.

But also, my parents unexpectedly adopted two kittens yesterday and I saw the pics in the morning and couldn’t stop thinking of them all day. It’s... kind of a complicated emotional situation so I’m like.. excited and I want to pet the animals, but also... a little sad, a little mixed up about it all.

Anyway I wasn’t going to talk about ANY of that; I watched Orphan Black tonight and was going to write about that.

This was a good episode--there was a lot going on, though, so it’s hard to give one general impression.

The outfits were A++ today. I feel like costuming really outdid themselves. I loved all the sweaters. I love that Sarah is dressing more like Beth now, which is very funny, and I think Cosima and Delphine, though still obnoxious as characters, looked particularly stunning. I loved Cosima’s long sweater! And Delphine’s perfectly proportioned outfit.

Also I can’t believe Cosima went out to get ice cream, in December, in the Midwest (?) wearing nothing but underwear and a long coat. The gall.

I feel like the first time I watched this, I didn’t really like DiAngelo much, but I’ll be honest, she’s growing on me!! I don’t know why. I guess the first time I saw her as a Beth/Sarah antagonist but this time I kinda see her as just a really gung-ho detective/bulldog who likes morgues and... Idk I appreciate her as a character.

I loved that we got so much Alison today. Is she ever not perfect? The arguments about figure skating coaching. How she just stands outside of Chad’s car and stares at him and blinks in this really intense way. “This is the first hit I’ve had since Godspell in college.” “You want me to coach you? You’re in the end zone! Coach me coach me!” The fight in the middle of the street in suburbia. “Bad things have happened to me.” And let us not ever forget I’M A BITCH I’M A LOVER I’M A CHILD I’M A MOTHER. My queen.

I can’t believe Sarah just walks into Mrs. S’s house like “Hey sorry to wake you up, I’m a clone.” But I’m glad Alison got to meet Mrs. S because, not knowing Alison’s mom at all, I feel like Mrs. S is the mom she needs. I also love seeing Mrs. S be a little softer. You can see why she would foster kids.

It’s interesting that most of the clones are in vitro births, not adoptees... I kinda forgot that.

Back to Alison again... I think Aynsley is very interesting. She’s definitely not Alison’s monitor--that is of course Donnie--but because Alison thinks she is, and because there really is some average, normal person drama between them, their feud becomes this perfect mash of genres: the sci fi and the suburban satire. I can’t entirely decide what Aynsley thinks is happening: does she think of herself as Alison’s friend or more her frenemy? Is she trying to undermine Alison or doing it accidentally? I lean toward the actual friend interpretation... she’s a little catty, a little oblivious, a little condescending, and a lot nosy, but she does mean to be helpful. She isn’t trying to hurt Alison by taking over skating, and she doesn’t realize how snobby she sounds when she talks about Alison’s plans to divorce. But her intentions are good. I think. That’s where I’m leaning.

RIP Olivier but not really. No wonder I only remembered the tail.

I know I’ve said it before but I really think the casting of Kira was perfect. She’s so good at being very slightly creepy but also perfectly angelic, and she has this... aura of just... knowing everything, being very aware to an almost psychic degree. Like how she’s not afraid of Helena because she sees the hurt person inside--and perhaps sees the connection to her own mother? I like how they wrote Kira having these very subtle special powers or abilities--not so strong or obvious that they seem out of place for the genre, but just obvious enough to be undeniable. Like the super healing ability she shows in the next ep. I also love how she just walks out with Helena, then talks to her a little, and then just... leaves to walk back home. “Oh, you thought you were kidnapping me? No.”

Well, only two more eps left...!

Kookish Enough? (Kiara x Rafe)

A/N: Okay, so I truly believe in the theory that the anon is mentioning and I literally could not agree more. I mean, just from the short interactions between Rafe and Kie there was definitely a vibe that gave off the impression that something went down between them during Kie’s Kook year. I changed the request just a bit so I hope you don’t mind! I just felt like the changes fit the story better. Also, ngl I don’t really like this much but it was the best I could do tbh.

Pairing: Kie x Rafe, Kie x Pogues (platonic)

Word Count: 3,410

Request: hi! idk if ur still taking requests but one of my favorite fan theories in this fandom is that some shit went down with Kie and Rafe during her kook year, so I was wondering if u could write a fic where maybe they were dating but he pressured her to sleep with him and that’s why their relationship ended? or maybe he just hurt her in some way and then the pogues find out about it like when she apologizes to them after her kook year and what happened between her and Rafe is the reason she stopped talking to the pogues? sorry if this makes no sense. u can make it a ship if u want but I’d love it if it was just the pogues all being friends cause I loved that in comfort. also, u totally don’t have to write this if u don’t want, but I saw that other ask where the anon asked if u could post their ask and just let them know so I would appreciate it if u could do that, haha ok that's all thank u very much :)

Summary: What went down during Kie’s Kook year? Why did she stop talking to the Pogues? And why does Rafe have anything to do with it? The answer is pretty simple: Kiara was trying to be Kookish enough to be accepted.

Warnings: Rafe pressuring Kie into having sex with him

KOOKISH ENOUGH?

Ever since Kiara had become friends with Sarah, she was being teased a lot less by the rest of the Kooks. That did not mean that the teasing stopped. Especially when it came from Rafe Cameron and his group of friends.

See, Kiara had only become friends with Sarah very recently, and she felt as if her whole world changed because of it. Long gone were the hallway tauntings and the lonely lunch periods. Now, these times were occupied by hanging around Kildare’s Kook Princess and her friends, enjoying the feel of popularity and fitting in.

However, Kiara mostly kept this relationship inside of the school walls, as she would spend her free time with her other friends: the Pogues. She didn’t like mixing her two groups of friends (mainly because fights were sure to sprout between them), which left her no choice of hanging out with them separately. 

Rafe, on the other hand, was busy with his own friends. He had never even bothered to tease Kiara during school before, but when she suddenly showed up at his house perched on his sister’s arm, this quickly changed. Kiara was known around school for hanging around Pogues, and when Rafe noticed his sister hanging out with a Kook traitor (in other words, Kie), he knew he had to do something to stop it.

And so began the constant teasing and tormenting from his part. However, no matter how much he would call Kie names, the dark-skinned girl would never budge. She would show no emotion on her face as he would tease her, which ultimately pissed him off. Why was this girl, of all people, the only person that didn’t seem to be bothered by him? Or anyone, for that matter?

Little did the blond know that Kiara actually hated it. She didn’t like feeling under attack, and the boy would usually do just that. This did not mean she would pull away from her friends. She tried to ignore Rafe as much as possible while maintaining her relationships with Sarah and the Pogues, despite all the teasing she would receive. 

Kiara was strong, Rafe would give her that. And this only made her want to turn away more. But, one day after months of teasing from his part, Kiara lashed back at him.

“Hey, Kook traitor,” Rafe had called out to her that afternoon when she was exiting the school building. “Not hanging out with my sister today? Leaving her for the Pogues?”

Kiara only rolled her eyes as she hiked her backpack higher on her shoulder and tried to walk away. Rafe had been having a particularly bad day that afternoon, which made anger boil when Kie didn’t turn around to pay him attention. He latched onto her shoulder, spinning her around. He didn’t expect her to finally talk back to him.

“What do you want, Rafe? Or are you here just to continue bothering me?” she spat out at him. 

“I don’t want much,” Rafe began answering. “Just for you to stop hanging around my sister.”

“What’s it to you?” the girl replied. “It’s none of your business who Sarah hangs out with.”

“It is when she’s hanging around a Kook traitor.”

Kie was used to that term being used against her, so she didn’t even flinch. “So, what? You’re mad because, in your opinion, I’m not Kookish enough?”

Rafe hadn’t managed to nod back and spit out another angry reply as Kie turned around. “Grow up,” she said to him with finality.

Rafe’s blood boiled inside of his veins. How dare she talk to him like that? Who did she think she was?

Whatever Rafe told himself, he couldn’t deny the fact that Kie had slightly turned him on, and that he really wouldn’t mind that she continued to hang around his sister.

******************************************************************************************

When Kiara and Sarah had been best friends for about five months, the Camerons threw a party at their mansion. That weekend, their parents were absent (probably off to the Bahamas or something of that sort) which meant that the whole student body of Kook Academy was squished into their living room. 

Kiara was dressed in a crop top and some shorts, which were both from a well-known designer. She had begun to wear the clothes that her mother would buy her so that she would fit in more with the Kooks she had recently befriended. Maybe, she had thought, that way Rafe would tease her less. However, if you asked her about her change of wardrobe, she would never admit it was because of Rafe bothering her, no. She would lie and say that she had realized how pretty all of the clothes were and that she was just being stubborn before by not wearing them.

Rafe had noticed this change in Kiara. Her clothes were also a little bit more revealing than before, and he couldn’t help but let his eyes wander on her exposed skin. He had started to bother the girl less, but he still hadn’t stopped. This was mainly due to the fact that he had seen her hanging around with the Pogues recently, and although it was jealousy he was feeling, he told himself he was mad at the fact that she was still a Kook traitor.

When they bumped into themselves that night, they were both on the dance floor. Rafe had accidentally bumped into the dark-skinned girl, which caused her to turn around and apologize to him. However, upon realizing who she had crashed with, she swallowed her apologies back, expecting him to let out some stupid remark about how she was a Kook traitor and not good enough to be Sarah’s friends. But Rafe remained silent. He was entranced by how good Kiara looked that night, and he noticed the makeup that surrounded her eyes and how her hair looked extra shiny.

Kiara almost scoffed. “No teasing this time?” she questioned. “Am I finally Kookish enough for you?”

Rafe rolled his eyes and then smiled a little, leaving the girl before him confused. 

“Look, I’m sorry, okay? Can we just forget about everything that happened between us and be friends?”

Kiara crossed her arms across her chest while looking over Rafe’s stance. He seemed sincere. Meanwhile, Rafe did everything he could to not let his eyes flit towards the girl’s chest area.

“Fine,” Kiara finally said. “But only because you’re Sarah’s brother.”

Rafe broke out into a smile and held his hand out for her to shake. When her hand slipped through his, Rafe felt tingles travel up and down the length of his body, so he dragged the girl forward and pulled her into a dance. Kiara giggled as they began to twirl and move to the rhythm of whatever trashy song was sounding through the speakers.

They spent hours and hours on the dance floor, never letting go of each other. Kiara was, admittedly, having a good time with the blond Kook. She was happy she had forgiven him, charmed by his witty humor and good looks. Maybe he wasn’t as bad as she had thought.

All of a sudden the air between them became tense. The eye contact held between them was intense, and Kiara felt Rafe’s large hands pulling her closer to him by her waist. He was staring at Kie’s lips before looking up at her eyes as if asking for permission to kiss her. Kiara’s breathing was rapid and she felt herself grow nervous. Kiara had already had her first kiss before, but Rafe was a senior and a lot more experienced than she was. She worried that if they kissed she wouldn’t be able to live up to his expectations.

Suddenly, Rafe lurched forward and connected their lips. Everything surrounding them seemed to fade away, leaving them and the music and nothing else. Rafe kissed her tenderly, which surprised Kiara as she expected him to be rougher. When they broke apart they opened their eyes and shared a knowing look before smiling a bit. With that, Rafe dragged the girl away to his room.

They made out until the party was over.

*************************************************

Only two weeks after the party, Rafe and Kiara were dating. Secretly because of Sarah, but dating none the less. More than ever before Kiara was spending time at the Cameron mansion, sneaking away from Rafe’s sister to be able to meet him.

The relationship came almost at a perfect time for the pair. See, Rafe’s father was on his back more than ever because he was going to be graduating high school soon, which meant he was going to be getting involved with the family business. On the other hand, Kiara’s parents were happier than ever to see their child being acquainted with the Cameron family and spending less time with her previous friends. 

Their relationship served as a “stress reliever” to both of them. Their secret make-out sessions (which would sometimes escalate a little) and their nights whispering to each other were times they cherished a lot. Kiara would tell him about what she went through before befriending Sarah as Rafe would tell her about his father and his issues with him.

They both became extremely emotionally invested in their relationship. Which wasn’t a bad thing. Well, most of the time it wasn’t a bad thing.

The Pogues noticed how Kiara was spending less and less time with them, and they questioned her about it.

“What’s up with you lately?” John B had asked the last time they took the boat out to the marsh with her.

“What do you mean?” she tried to avoid the topic by raising another question.

“You’ve been avoiding us recently,” Pope explained from where he eyes Kiara over his book. “Is it because of Sarah?”

“Sort of,” the girl said, unsure if she wanted to tell them about why exactly she was seeing the boys less.

“What do you mean ‘sort of’?” JJ inquired from where he was pulling a net full of fish from the water. “Did you get a boyfriend or something?”

Kiara blushed, confirming what the blond boy had said was true. “No way!” Pope exclaimed. “Who is he? Is he a Kook?”

“God, please don’t let it be a Kook,” John B exclaimed jokingly.

Kiara was mad at this statement. So what if Rafe was a Kook? Shouldn’t they just be happy that she’s found someone she liked?

“Actually, it is a Kook,” she said, the tone of her voice showing she was pissed off.

“Wait, really?” John B questioned. “Well, we should have expected that, actually.”

Kiara furrowed her eyebrows. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Oh, you know,” JJ said, his jaw clenching and unclenching repeatedly. “Just that you’ve been blowing us off to hang around all of those Kooks from your preppy school.”

“So what?” Kiara spat out. “I’m sorry I made some other friends that aren’t you guys.”

“That’s not the point, Kie,” Pope said. “It’s cool that you’ve made friends, but you aren’t hanging out with us anymore.”

“That’s a lie! What am I doing right now?”

John B scoffed. “Yeah, and you’re hanging out with us after how long of not doing so?”

Kiara looked down, intertwining her hands. They were sort of right. “Look, I’m sorry, okay? It’s just - I spent so much time hating the academy and now that I have friends it doesn’t suck anymore. And I don’t want it to suck again. So I have to spend time with the Kooks.”

“We know that,” JJ said as he gathered up the fish he had pulled out from the water. “Just hang out with us too.”

That afternoon, Kie promised the boys she would hang out with them more frequently, but she didn’t manage to keep that promise.

When she arrived home, Rafe was waiting for her with a frown on her face. That was when she knew she was going to have to cut off the Pogues.

******************************************************************************

Kiara hadn’t realized how much she relied on the Pogues until she couldn’t contact them. Rafe would get mad each time she did that, and normally she would have stood up for herself and her friends, but she didn’t want her school life to go back to what it had been before Sarah and Rafe. 

She was mad at herself for being weak and for wanting to stay with Rafe. Before that day that Rafe had confronted her about the Pogues, she still talked to them every day via text messages despite not hanging out with them much. But now, she didn’t even talk to them anymore. 

Rafe was demanding. The couple of months they had been together evidenced that. He wanted to spend as much time as he could with Kiara, whether to keep her under his watch or just to be distracted from his own problems she didn’t know. Kiara felt like she was drowning in the waters of Rafe Cameron’s deep eyes, waters that managed to encapture her and lure her into his world of problems. 

Kiara noticed how he began to leave his house at random times while she was hanging around with Sarah. When he would come back, he would seem distracted and unfocused. Almost as if he was not actually in the room. His eyes would travel across his surroundings without stoping on anyone’s faces or without hitching even once. It was almost as if his glazed orbs were looking at a blank canvas and moving over it. Kiara didn’t understand what was wrong with him, but she didn’t want to pressure him into telling her. She knew Rafe would only get mad at that.

However, when it had been going on for too long and it was happening too frequently, Kiara decided enough was enough. Something was wrong with Rafe and she was going to get to the bottom of it. 

When Sarah fell asleep that evening, Kiara stood as quietly as she could from the bed where she lay, removing the covers from her body. She walked down the hallway and opened the door to Rafe’s room without emitting a single noise. She really didn’t want Ward or Rose to realize she was in the bedroom.

It seemed as if Rafe hadn’t heard Kiara stepping inside because when she turned around to look at him, he was hunched over his desk. Kiara noticed a dollar bill rolled up in his hands and he seemed to be holding it close to his nose.

“Rafe,” she startled him, confusion dancing across her eyes. “What are you doing?”

The blond stood from where he was seated and tried to cover Kiara’s view of the desk. But she saw exactly what he was doing.

Kiara couldn’t believe it. Was Rafe that fucked up that he had turned to drugs? Was she not enough comfort for him?

“Hey, what are you doing here?” he questioned the girl who was backing away from him. Rafe saw the slight fear in her eyes, which made him know she had seen what was on his desk.

“What’s wrong, Rafe? Why are you doing d-drugs?”

Kiara was trying to handle the situation, but she didn’t know how to do so. Was she supposed to approach him gently and try to get him clean? Was she supposed to keep her distance from him because of what he was doing? She didn’t know, she didn’t know.

“Babe, I swear it’s nothing.”

“Nothing?” she repeated. Her voice was shaking a little bit, and Rafe tried to take hold of her hands to calm her down. She only flinched away from his touch. “Those are hard drugs, Rafe. What is going on?”

“Kie, please keep your voice down. I pro-”

“Why? So nobody hears that you’re doing drugs? Coke, nonetheless?”

She was completely freaking out. Rafe couldn’t have her freaking out and letting everyone in his house know what he was doing.

“Kie, calm down, okay? Yes, I’m doing drugs, but I swear it was just this one time.”

“Don’t lie! Is this why you’ve been coming back all whacked out at random times during the day?”

Rafe sighed. He rubbed his hands over both of his eyes before tousling his hair a bit. He needed Kie to calm down.

“Okay, I admit I’ve been doing this for a while. But I promise this is the last time-”

“Stop lying, Rafe! We both know this isn’t your last time.”

“No, we don’t know that. Look., I’ll stop doing drugs. But please don’t tell Sarah what I was doing. I don’t want my family to know.”

“I can’t do that, Rafe. You need help.”

“NO, I DON’T!” Rafe suddenly yelled. Kiara pushed her body into the door of the room. “I’m fine, okay? I have my shit together and everything is okay. Okay?”

Kiara only shook her head as tear began to fall from her eyes. “Who are you?” she whispered.

“I’m me, baby. I’m still Rafe,” he tried to convince her. Or was he trying to convince himself?

“No, you’re not. Not the Rafe I knew.”

Kiara turned around to open the door and run away from whoever was standing before her, but he tugged her back by her arm. A yelp escaped past her lips, indicating that Rafe had hurt her. He let go at once, giving the girl before him a pleading look.

“I can’t be with you anymore. I don’t know how to be with you,” she said before opening the door and running away.

That night, they both fell asleep feeling like cowards.

*****************************************************************

Kiara cried for days. It was her first break up, and it was caused by something she would have never expected. 

She tried to be positive around everybody, but they could all tell she was not okay. They didn’t ask her about it though. Not even her friends from school. Not even Sarah.

Kiara spent most of her time locked away in her room. No texts came in. No one called.

After spending the whole week crying, she finally decided enough was enough. And so she pulled her phone out from the drawer she had kept it in during the past hours and sent a couple of texts to Sarah. 

While she waited for a reply, Kiara began to clean herself up. She took a much-needed shower and changed out of her dirty clothes. She brushed her hair and curled it the way Sarah and a couple of other girls from the Kook Academy had taught her. Then she checked her phone, expecting to see Sarah’s reply.

However, the blonde girl had read the messages and not replied. That’s weird, Kiara thought. She must be busy. 

Kiara tried to message some other girls from school to see what they were up to and if any of them were with Sarah, but no one replied.

Deciding to pass some time, Kiara opened the Instagram app on her phone, scrolling through stories and skimming over some posts a couple of people had posted recently. She suddenly stopped when she saw a story of some girls that were dressed to attend a party, and as she read what the image sid above it, tears flooded Kiara’s eyes.

Sarah had celebrated her birthday today. And she hadn’t invited Kiara.

In her rage, Kiara contacted the police claiming to be making a noise complaint. She recited Sarah’s address before hanging up and crying for a short while on the floor of her room.

Once her tears were all gone (and she was extremely dehydrated), the dark-skinned girl stood up and left her house.

The walk to her destination was short, but she was going at the slowest pace possible to avoid getting there. She was nervous as to what they would say, but she was tired of being a coward. She had to suck it up and accept the consequences of her actions. And she would start by apologizing.

Once she reached the Chateau, Kiara wiped her eyes just in case there were any stray tears. She looked towards the dock, where she saw three bodies lounging around. Pope was reading and was holding a flashlight towards his books. JJ was holding a fishing pole while smoking a blunt as he spoke to John B, who was perched on the railing and sipping a beer. 

Kiara breathed in, trying to relax her muscles. She could do this. She had to do this. And with that, she approached the three boys.

Survey #353

“well i’m a creep  /  i’m a weirdo  /  what the hell am i doing here?  /  i don’t belong here”

If you won an all-expenses paid trip to anywhere in the world for a one week vacation, where would you choose to go? For just one week, um... maybe South Africa, actually. Two weeks would probably be more ideal, but I've learned via my friend who worked with the KMP for a year that it's very isolating and you're very disconnected from society (also from the Internet, haha), but regardless, I REALLY wanna see the meerkats. Especially with the heat and all, one week might actually be all right. How often do you get notifications on your favorite social media site? That would be Facebook, and it really depends on how much I share that day. Sometimes I barely touch it, and sometimes I share a billion things and get a few notifications of people reacting. What’s something you’re actively trying to forget/care less about, if anything? Hi, have I told you about my breakup? What was the last encounter you had with a bug? Ugh, the fucking house is having an ant problem. Apparently, it's happened before here this time of year, so a couple times a days I find one on my arm or something and crush it. What is something considered “childish” that you still like or enjoy doing? I'm certain some people would consider RP childish, given it's essentially "make believe," and that's one reason I don't tell people about it. Name a song that you have a strong emotional connection to. Why is that song so important to you? The #1 song would be "Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zeppelin. I've told why before and don't feel like doing it again. Is cannabis legal where you live? Nope, but it should be. How often do you walk your dog, if you have one? I don't have a dog. What is something you'd feel confident enough to give a presentation on? Me? Comfortable giving a presentation? Bitch please. Which CoVid vaccine did you receive, if any? I got Moderna. I wanted Pfizer, but supposedly they're the same thing, just different manufacterors. How do you feel you've made a difference in the world? I don't feel I have. But it's my goal in life to die feeling like I did. Do you eat any candies in a specific order? (ie: M&M's) I fucking read this as "candles" and was really confused. But anyway, yes, but not M&Ms; I only do that with candies that actually have unique tastes depending on color, like Skittles. What is one common childhood illness that you managed not to catch? I never got chickenpox. Is there an heirloom that has been passed down generations of your family? Probably, but I don't know about it. What is the most unique pet that you ever owned, or would like to? Hm. I'd say maybe a Chinese water dragon? People tend to not know what they are; they mistake them for iguanas all the time. Have you ever been in a bad car accident before? A bad one, no, but I've been in one, nevertheless. At the description of what happened though, the cop said we were extremely lucky we weren't flipped over. My mom's driving skill saved us. What is your favorite type of weather to experience? Snow! I like a steady pace of large flakes. Do you know your social security by heart? I don't, actually, but I did at one point. Now, I only know the last four digits. Would you move out your house if you could right now? Yes, even if we just moved here. Mom and I really, really don't like living in the suburbs. We miss being in the middle of nowhere. When is the last time you slept in someone else’s bed? Not since I last visited Sara's. Do you like being called baby? Not really. Like if it's from an s/o, it's all right, it's just really not my favorite. Have you ever slept in the same bed of the opposite sex? Yeah. When shopping at a grocery store, do you return the cart? I openly judge the fuck out of you if you don't. Do you think you would survive in the wilderness if you were abandoned there? I know I couldn't. Not in my shape. If you had a child at the age you’re at now, do you think you’d be a good parent? God, no. Do you eat your Oreos with milk? Yes. I strongly prefer them that way. Do you think French kissing is gross? I mean in concept I think it indisputably is, like even if you brush your tongue, it's still just... gross. But that doesn't mean I'm against it at all or won't do it when I love somebody. It's an "I accept you and your germs" thing, haha. Are you wearing make-up? What brand(s)? No. I pretty much never wear makeup anymore, even to take pictures. The last male you spoke to…is he attractive? That would be my psychiatrist, and I'm not attracted to him, no. He's like another dad to me. Have you ever had mice in your house? Back when we lived in the woods, we would have a minor mouse problem in the winter sometimes. I fucking hated it because my parents used the inhumane traps, save for one. I guess it was an affordability thing, idk. One or two got caught in that one, and I would let them go outside. Do you enjoy working with animals? It depends on what I'm doing. If I'm cleaning up after an animal, NO, because I seriously struggle with stomaching it. I canNOT touch vomit or feces, so that kinda eliminates a lot of options. Because of how physically weak I am along with hyperhidrosis, I also can't really exert myself much, so there ya go, more reasons I can't. I wish I could. Have you ever been in a tornado or hurricane? Plenty of hurricanes. If you're in a competition, are you in it to win it or just for the fun? The fun, experience, and growth. What's your favorite show on Comedy Central? I don't watch it. Which love story would you want your life to turn out like? I don't know, really. Do you usually go to sleep before or after the people you're living with? Before, at least usually. Are you into ripped jeans? Yes, though I don't wear jeans anymore. Have you ever been to any Disney parks? Yeah, Disney World in Florida. Which band has the best name, in your opinion? "Cradle of Filth" sounds pretty damn badass and unholy, I dig it. Do kids often knock on your door on Halloween? This will be our first year in this house during Halloween, so I really don't know if any will? I mean we live in a suitable neighborhood, so idk. Which one of your exes do you feel like you have the most chemistry with? Sara. Do you share the same political views as your parents? Dad, no. Mom, some. Have you ever done any internship? No. What's the last thing you got paid to do? Take pictures for someone. What's something your mother always says? "Drive like everyone else is stupid." It works though, haha. Always expect that someone you see might do something moronic and be prepared. For example, she is very adamant about us looking both ways when a light changes to green versus going immediately, and it's literally saved Mom's and my sister's lives. What's something your dad always says? To reach out to him if we ever need help with anything, and he'll do everything in his power to be there. What's your favorite thing to wear? Loose tank tops with loose-ish pj pants. What's your favorite day of the week? Nowadays, it's Fridays. Snake Discovery and The Dark Den both upload that day, haha. Do you have a favorite coloring book artist? Lisa Frank is the Wholesome Lead Bitch. Have you ever wanted to model? No. Have you ever seen someone have a seizure? Yeah, my sister. What's your favorite car? I am not NEARLY educated enough on cars to answer this. Why did you cry the last time you did? I'm seriously grieving Virginia. Her death has stricken me harder than any other I've experienced, even my own grandmother's. Who was the last person to piss you off? Probably someone on Facebook, but idr. Do you like winter? I love winter. Do you have a favorite flower? Yeah; I really like orchids. Dahlias are also gorgeous, and roses... Would you get a shamrock tattooed to your forehead for $5000? No. As great as that money sounds, tattoos are (relatively) permanent, and that would look pretty stupid imo. Are you very flexible? Not anymore. Who was the last person to tell you you looked nice? Probably Mom. Do you have the right time set on your microwave? Yeah. Do you have any old newspaper articles? Why? No. Do you have a flat screen tv or just a regular box? Flat screen. Do you like Tootsie Rolls? Ugh, no. Do you like Slim Jim’s? Oh fuuuuuuck yeah man. What color is your mousepad? Black. Do you get your eyebrows waxed? I used to, but now I just leave 'em be. Would you date someone that had a different religion from you? It would depend on the religion and the intensity. I could NOT date someone exceptionally religious. A common question: What are you listening to? Caleb Hyles and Halocene's cover of Radiohead's "Creep." Would you ever get a nature tattoo? Well, I want at least a meerkat tattoo, so. I'll probably get a snake somewhere, too. Where do your siblings work, if anywhere? My older sister is a mammographer, and my little sister is a children's social worker. Saving lives, then there's me lmao. Who do you generally talk to the most? Mom and Sara. Have you ever had a crush on someone of the same gender? Yeah, multiple times. Do you enjoy painting? Not really, no. I stress out about messing up. When, where, and why did a needle last pierce your skin? Around a week ago, left shoulder, to get my first Covid vaccine. Is there a person you talk to everyday with? Well, considering I live with my mother... I usually talk to Sara too, but a day sometimes passes where we don't. Does one of your parents ever complain to you about the other parent? Mom does that all the time about Dad. It's no shocker they're divorced. Dad's long since moved on and doesn't talk shit about her. Who was the last person you wished a “Happy Birthday” to? I actually don't remember... Someone on Facebook, I'm sure. Does your best friend have a job? Not right now, she's dealing with some wild health issues where it's much safer that she doesn't. When you move out your house (or if you already have moved out) do you plan on still visiting your parents' house? Well of course. I especially plan on visiting my mother at least once a week, either going to her place for dinner or her coming over to mine for the same. We're way too close for me to not see her. I'll still visit Dad, too. Do you usually take home leftovers if you eat out in a restaurant? It depends on what I had and if I know I'll eat it warmed up. What’s your favorite thing to have for breakfast? Cinnamon rolls. Why did you break your last promise? I barely EVER break promises, but this one I actually forgot I even made. ;_;

Zenith: Chapter 68-71

Chapter 68

Andi remembers how Kalee gave her a tour of her home and bragged about how she’d be ruling the place someday. Andi asks why her and not her brother.

Oh, Androma. Kalee had laughed then, tossing her head back in that glorious, carefree way that made everyone around her want to come closer. You and I both know that a woman can rule better than any man ever could. And I’ll look twice as good doing it, too.

Shinsay, voices muffled as their heads are stuck up each other’s asses: This is definitely, 100%, one whole, bona fide, authentic, organic, home-grown feminism that we just put in our book.

Also ... take a look at that weak-ass description that’s supposed to show us how good and cool Kalee is. When she laughs (in a way that tbh have you ever laughed? be real with me now), people want to ... come closer? 

Wow! That’s like saying ... when I scratch my face, people want to call their mom. When I brush my hair, people may spontaneously feel the need to take a slightly deeper breath.

Talk about low standards. Hey fellas, you ever see someone laugh and just kinda sorta want to approach them but not really? Yeah, that’s the stuff.

Andi thinks about how Kalee would’ve been a better ruler than her dad, who doesn’t even bother coming down to meet his tortured son because that’s how incompetent and evil and heartless he is. I mean, Andi doesn’t know that Valen is the result of rape, but still. Idk if I’m on board with how the book demonizes the hell out of the General but tried to make whatsherface sympathetic. And by “I don’t know if I am” I mean “I’m definitely not what the fuck is wrong with these people.”

Dex tries to make some conversation and Andi says that nobody befriended Kalee, that only super duper special people were CHOSEN by her to become her friends.

I’m ... not sure how this is supposed to be better. In fact, I’d say it’s worse?

“Kalee chose the people she wished to let into her life. I was honored that she allowed me to be assigned to her.”

“Honored?” Dex asked, raising a bruised brow. “Or damned?”

“I’ll let you know after we talk to the general,” Andi said.

I’m gonna fiking piss. “I’ll tell you whether this important life event was honor or damnation, but like, later, after we have this appointment, ok?” Why is this so funny. Have I fully lost my marbles?

Andi foreshadows some escape tunnels that are hidden all around the estate so Dex has a logical way to save them at the end of the book. I’m sure there is a more elegant way of setting that up, but I can’t be bothered to find one, so let’s call it acceptable and move on.

They arrive at their destination and Andi notices that Alfie seems bummed out. She muses that he’s “capable of far more complex thinking than she’d originally guessed,” which, DOY, but ok, and then thinks about how he’s saved her crew and remembered Gilly’s Marketable Space Pet, which implies he has some “understanding of feelings and attachments.”

That hamster wheel do be spinnin’.

The “head Spectre” comes out to meet them and ...

It took everything in her to speak as the truth struck her.

“Dad?”

DUN DUN DUUUN, it’s Andi’s dad! Also, “the truth struck her?” What truth? That it’s your dad? Was that in doubt? Did you really need a moment to connect the dots, to realize this is your dad? Was there a moment where you saw this man, who is your dad, and thought that this wasn’t your dad, only for the truth to strike and OH SHIT THAT’S MY DAD!! WOW HOLD YOUR HORSES EVERYONE I NEED TIME TO PROCESS THAT THIS IS INDEED MY DAD.

Tbh if you strapped knives to a roomba it’d have more charisma and presence as the protagonist than Andi. And let’s be real, more intelligence.

Yet another chapter ends on a pointless cliffhanger only for the scene to continue exactly where it left off!

You’re just full of surprises, Shinsay.

Chapter 69 (nice)

Andi recaps everything that she’s gone through after the Kalee crash up to the fight with the big alien dude who got deus ex machina-d by Alfie and how she nearly kissed Dex, which gets written as extra special, just so she can make this point:

But this...her father, as General Cortas’s head Spectre?

This might actually kill her.

And aside from how generically melodramatic it is, I can’t help but recall this, from chapter 7:

The man in front of her was a victim of her foolishness. Beside her was the man who’d rejected her love.

The two of them, together? It was nearly enough to shatter Andi.

Andi has the same reaction as I do when in a room with multiple men. Except in her case I think it’s supposed to be deep and personal.

Anyway, self-plagiarism aside, Andi thinks about how her dad was always there for her but then one day wasn’t when he didn’t support her on her trial and how conflicted she feels about him, both wanting to demand justice but also wanting comfort. This is actually quite touching and feels very grounded and realistic.

General Cortas rubs it in that Andi’s dad, “Comander Racella”, has been very loyal and hardworking since he was promoted after Andi’s trial. Andi hopes that her father actually hates the general and was forced to work for him as some sort of punishment for what happened with their daughters.

The general says the situation on Adhira has been taken care of, and when Andi asks whether Xen Ptera attacked because of Valen and her crew’s presence on Adhira, the general says that’s classified. For reasons? Idk. Seems pretty obvious to me, or maybe he just doesn’t know?

Dex tries to yap but Cortas flexes his big dick and reminds Dex that he’s a Guardian now, and Dex is too much of a baby to risk his regained status so he shuts up. This is all spelled out for us by Andi’s inner monologue, because we’re idiots.

The general claims the Xen Pteran forces have been wiped out, saying how it’s probably all they had since there’s few able-bodied and willing people to recruit for war after their planet got fucked, and when Andi presses him for why the attack happened now and on Adhira, he says:

“War never really ends, Androma. The desire for revenge is often too strong to forget.”

“War never ends ... But me and my crew totes ended that war just now. They don’t have any more soldiers so this war is over.” Makes sense, sir. 

Cortas says that queen Alara is safe and will be at the Peace Summit, which Andi immediately tells him to cancel because it would be the perfect opportunity for another attack. Cortas replies by saying that Arcardius is impenetrable and that the day the Olen System successfully invades will be the day “stars fall from the sky” which is a very poetic and not at all natural way to say something like this, so it’s there for ... idk dramatic irony? He also reminds her that the Summit is important because it celebrates the peace after the war and the unity between the systems and I’m here like ... for a guy who says war never ends, you sure seem happy to celebrate a war ending and don’t believe one is going on right now. But I guess these characters just exist to spout meaningless yet deep-sounding nonsense at each other.

Dex reminds the general that they’ve done their end of the deal, at which point the general conveniently decides to prolong it out of nowhere and essentially forces Andi and Dex to be Valen’s bodyguards at the Peace Summit by holding Andi’s crew and ship and Dex’s money and status hostage. Thanks for ensuring the main characters are there for the climax, sir! Appreciated!

Dex and Andi leave in a huff.

Chapter 70

We’re in Lira’s POV as she reminisces about her childhood with Lon while he’s recovering from his near-death-experience.

So she sat by [Lon’s] side for endless hours, until the warm clutches of sleep stole her away.

She dreams about flying on an “Adhiran darowak” but then DUN DUN DUUUN Adhira below turns into Xen Ptera and it’s horrible!

“No,” Lira gasped. Her heart began to crack. Fissures spread through it, reaching cold fingers through every valve until Lira felt darkness stealing her away.

So the editor just left that in, huh? Just let Shinsay use the exact same wording in less than 200 words? Must’ve been stolen away by the editing fairy for editing crimes while reading this.

Lira is woken up by Alara, who got here so fucking fast she must be part-Sonic on her father’s side. You’d think a planetary leader would have more to do after a sudden and deadly attack on her home planet, but I guess Adhirans are so chill they’ll just let their leader fuck off to take care of her angsty teenage niece instead.

Lira says that she’ll do anything to make up for bringing Valen to Adhira, to which Alara says that the only thing Lira will do is “follow her heart,” which is sweet of her to say but also really convenient and makes this whole decision easier for her.

I mean, it’s nice that Alara is so supportive, but 1) narratively, it removes the conflict that was introduced only a few chapters ago 2) it makes Alara seem like she’s only there to be the supportive cool aunt and the Good Queen, without any expectations or wants of her own. Like, wasn’t the pressure from Alara something that gave Lira actual conflict? Idk. Seems too easy, is what I’m saying.

Lira didn’t let go of her aunt until the tears dried up. Until they sat down on either side of Lon’s bedside, held his hands and spoke of happier times. The beauty of a family that could come together, broken, and still find a way to become something whole.

You’re one step away from “Ohana means family” over here, Shinsay. Stop spelling shit out. WE. GET. IT. Also, whose narration is this? We’ve mostly stuck to third person limited, so ... is Lira thinking this? Is she thinking this shit while it’s happening? About her own family and situation? What the fuck?

Shinsay couldn’t keep their suspiciously sticky fingers out of their own writing and let it breathe so it comes out looking like God’s mistake.

Anyway, Lon wakes up and Alara tells him what went down on Adhira.

Chapter 71

We’re back with Andi, who just got out of a bath and is bitterly admiring her “private quarters” when she’s interrupted by DUN DUN her dad! He’s been waiting for her!

It’s all very tense. Before they can really start talking, though, we get a flashback. No, really. This whole tense reunion between father and daughter is interrupted by a lengthy flashback brought on by Andi watching her dad and Remembering.

Because Shinsay.

It’s a flashback to Andi in a cell, the day before she was supposed to be executed. Her dad tells her that her mother is "not well” and we find out his name is Oren. As they’re saying their tearful goodbyes, Oren slips Andi a key and tells her “Bay Seven. Tomorrow at dawn.” 

The flashback ends with Andi’s cell standing empty the next morning.

Very cool and all that.

Back in the now, Andi rightfully chews her dad out for being a cowardly little bitch and throwing his teenage daughter under the bus for the sake of status. Something he freely admits to doing. He says he and her mother had to struggle to rebuild their reputation after she ruined it, and that he believes his daughter died with Kalee and that whoever he saved in the cell was already the Bloody Baroness even if she didn’t know it yet. Then he fucks off.

It’s all extremely silly. It would’ve been heartbreaking in any better book, but instead, it just feels like it’s tacked on for the sake of adding even more angst to Androma’s character. In fact, she’s not even upset at this. Instead she just carves some more tallies into her swords, dances some more with the dead, and then sneaks out.

No really, it’s written like a list.

She waited for the tears to come. But they never did.

Instead she sat alone, adding more tallies to her swords. Dancing with the dead inside her head.

Why is this so funny! I think it’s because both the tally-carving and the ghost-dancing is supposed to be these deep and haunted things she does that’s given a fair amount of weight and focus, but then it’s just written out like this like it’s just some generic routine shit she does like brushing her teeth or wiping her ass.

Yup, there she goes, doing her generic angsty shit one after the other. Emotional whiplash glossed over for the sake of moving the plot along. She’s in such a bad mental state that we simply MUST ignore it and move on.

Also, I want to highlight how convenient it is for Shinsay to already have Andi suspect and previously coming to terms with how her parents don’t love her before this confrontation. Like, we see her father save her tearfully, yet Andi has almost no hope that he still loves her. Or, she does, but when it’s squashed, she just ... accepts it? Because hey, she already processed that trauma years before! Makes it easy!

Wouldn’t it make it more impactful if all these years, she’s hoped that she has a home to come back to? That her father’s final act of saving her meant they love her still and want her to come back? And now she finds out that they never even mourned her loss? Wouldn’t that be heart-wrenching? And also add to the idea that Andi wants to return to Arcardia, both because it’s her home planet but also because that’s where her parents are? Instead we’re led to believe Andi wants to return, but when she does, she hates it here, she knows nobody wants her here, and she wants to leave immediately.

I seriously question the inclusion of this subplot and these characters. It adds nothing, changes nothing, and is just there to make Andi more angsty, which she already is, so ... why is this here lmao?

Shinsay really went “let’s squander all our potentially interesting ideas and concepts for the sake of more cheap angst and making our protag a cool emotionless badass who don’t care for no thing.”

Shima please tell me about your galaxy brain human Lucario AU I wanna know how it all pans out

NDASKMADMLASMKSA OMG ANON I am more than happy to share :'D This got really REALLY long, I hope you enjoy a good read lmao

So we have. Lucario. As a human. Possibly named after an actual Pokemon Lucario, idk. He's still Aaron's apprentice—trains under him at the castle to become an aura user. However, human Lucario is like. 15, making his connection to Aaron that much more powerful bc he's pretty much baby and Aaron's in his mid twenties practically raising this kid by himself. Lucario views Aaron as kind of a father/guardian figure? He's still so uptight at this point tho;; and he views Lady Rin as a mother (which. Is. SOFT). Rin and Aaron might be in love, it's hard for Lucario to tell, he doesn't Romance. He just focuses on his aura training. Pssh.

Fast forward to the time of the Big Pokemon War. Aaron realizes the only way to stop the fighting is to go find Mew at the Tree of Beginning. However he knows that this is a huge sacrifice—and knowing how loyal Lucario is to him, Aaron knows he'll follow him and be subjected to the same fate. And Aaron's like—Lucario is just a kid, you know? He still has so much more to experience and live for. So while it fucking breaks his heart to shatter Lucario's trust in him (for the time being) and totally ruin his father figure status, Aaron "betrays" Lucario and traps him inside the staff. It's some crazy magic aura crystal thing that seals something inside of it, whether it be a Pokemon, human, spirit, or whatever else. At this point it's also for Lucario's safety—bc nothing can really touch him while he's in there, and they're in the middle of a war, so yeah it's just really good timing and planning to protect his kid. However Aaron, being the adorable himbo dumbass he is, kinda forgets that this is an aura crystal, and therefore needs aura to "unseal" it essentially, which would set Lucario free. Unfortunately after Aaron goes to the Tree and gives up his life to stop the war (cue Titanic music) there's not really any other aura user around. They're pretty rare, even way back then;; so Lucario falls into a deep slumber, being sealed, and is kept there for about 1000 years.

And then!! Ash fucking Ketchum enters the picture!!

Lucario is suddenly woken because he senses Aaron's aura nearby. Absolutely pissed at Dad for leaving him behind, Lucario escapes from the staff and goes to attack, but stops when he realizes Dad is actually not Dad, it is adorable 14 year-old boy who has a similar aura to Aaron. Cue a very disgruntled teenager running through the palace, totally out of place and confused. Eventually he's stopped by Lady Ilene, who explains what's going on. Naturally Lucario's heartbroken—not only is his master/dad/guardian dead, but so is his mother figure, and everybody else he'd once known in the castle. Bc Ilene looks so similar to Rin, Lucario takes comfort from her. Ilene does her best to console him and asks if he'll do her a favor. He leaps at the chance to make her happy—apparently he's a sucker for getting good Parent Figures to like him—and agrees to go help Ash and co. find Pikachu at the Tree of Beginning.

Instead of Lucario doing the Naruto run ahead of the group (which like. How the fuck is he so fast...) he actually sits in the car in the passenger's seat with Kidd doing the driving for him, bc hell if a human can run for that long and not be totally wiped out afterward (also he just woke up from a 1000 year nap. Yeahhh. Not gonna happen.) Also baby has no idea what the fuck a car even is so he's a bit nervous around it, and Kidd's like "Um yeah no I'm not letting you drive. Just tell me where to go" so Lucario uses his aura to lead her. Things progress p much the same way, with Lucario getting strangely attached to Ash despite not wanting to, at all, but it's hard because Ash is just Perfect and a Good Boy and pretty much gives Lucario the sort of attention he craves. Eventually tho that all comes to a head when Ash brings up his friendship with Pikachu. Lucario's still bitter about Aaron and honestly can't bring himself to trust any of them—and is pissed at himself for having taken a liking to Ash despite that—so that leads into their giant fight in the first step of their enemies to lovers trope. Ha. Even so, he still gets consoled by Max (and is given CHOCOLATE!! Which is the most fucking heavenly thing he's ever tasted), and witnesses Ash unable to sleep bc of his honest worry for Pikachu. Lucario does some Deep Thinking to himself about his relations to the group.

The next day, the group activates the Time Flower that recorded Aaron's entire abandonment of Lucario. Believe it or not being a young kid in training for a war tends to give you a bit of trauma, so Lucario freaks out a little and starts attacking the hollow projections of the enemy Pokemon. Ash manages to calm him down. Lucario collapses and asks why Aaron had abandoned him. What did he do wrong? Why would Aaron turn against the kingdom? Why did Aaron trap him in the staff? He doesn't know shit and it's frustrating. Ash comes up to him and apologizes, and as soon as the waterworks turn on Lucario's like oh nooo. Oh NOOOO. Here's this boy laying his heart out on his sleeve and is so honest and open and sincere that he can't help but feel awful for how he treated him. Lucario immediately forgives Ash and is like "I will now protect you with my life" bc Ash is baby and Lucario realizes for the first time!! He's made an actual friend with somebody that isn't his dad or the queen! And if he's friends with Ash that means he can be friends with Brock and May and Max and Kidd too. The prospect is EXCITING. He can trust these people now, he knows, because they saw what happened and they believed him about Aaron. They're choosing to side with him over the "kingdom's hero" and that honestly means a lot—it's a huge commitment and Lucario's just. Super grateful that he has a group of people backing him up. Lucario promises himself that he'll reunite Ash and Pikachu, bc if he were given the chance he'd reunite with the people he once held dear too. Ash and Pikachu really care about each other and Lucario admires and respects that a lot and he wants to make Ash happy so!! He's like. It is my personal mission to see that we find Pikachu successfully. And Ash is just like :'D !!! And it's that moment when Lucario realizes that he might like Ash a biiit more than he originally thought he did. Huh.

Literally not even 30 seconds after that revelation Regirock attacks and Lucario almost has a fucking aneurysm because he JUST made friends with these people!! And now they're going to get killed if he's not careful! Story of his life. He immediately shifts into Protect Ash Mode™ and hurries everyone to safety. Things are crazy. Lucario has too much of a burden on his shoulders. He's stressed. But Ash is with him and that makes things a little bit better so he focuses on getting them to where they need to go and protecting them along the way. Big job for such a young kid. Whew!!

Traveling through the Tree of Beginning, weird antibodies keep voring people, and it's not fun. At one point Lucario takes the bullet for Kidd, but is mysteriously released (probably bc of his aura and his connection to Aaron, who gave up his life, which gave energy to the tree and to Mew. So there's a connection there. The tree kinda sees Lucario as one of its own.) Finally, finally! Ash and Pikachu are reunited! Lucario can immediately sense how close they are and how much of a bond they have. Seeing someone with so much history with Ash makes Lucario a bit shy around Pikachu, but it’s cool, they warm up to each other eventually!

Right after this, Ash and the others find out that May, Brock and Max were devoured by the antibodies. Lucario barely has any time to grieve for them before the Regis burst in and essentially trap him as Ash and Kidd are attacked by the cells next. Lucario watches in absolute horror as Ash is swallowed up. It’s like Aaron all over again—and this time it’s worse because Ash hadn’t done anything wrong, and Lucario had really come to trust him and admire him as a person. It’s absolutely fucking heartbreaking. He watches in hollow-eyed despair as Pikachu and Ash’s other Pokemon cry over him. Everything sucks. The world is a nightmare. Lucario almost wishes he’d gotten swallowed too. Why is it always him that’s the last one standing, the only one left, the remainder to deal with the carnage and the loss by himself? Then Mew performs its voodoo magic and lo and behold!! Ash and the others are miraculously revived! Lucario is absolutely overjoyed and relieved. It’s then that he realizes he’d be absolutely devastated if he lost Ash for good—even more so than Aaron. At this point he’s kinda come to terms about Aaron’s death, though it still hurts because there’s so many questions left unanswered.

Of course right after this Mew collapses and everything goes to shit again. Great. (Can he get like five seconds to maybe just breathe?? Idk.) At the center of the Tree of Beginning, Lucario finds Aaron’s gloves and things start to click into place. Maybe...the stories were true? Lucario activates the Time Flower there and realizes what Aaron had done, his noble sacrifice, and why he couldn’t bear to get Lucario involved. Lucario breaks down in tears bc he’s so relieved and yet so unbearably sad. Aaron was like his father. Someone who cared for him so immensely and deeply. Aaron urged Lucario to continue on and live his life to the fullest—that’s what he wanted for him, after all. But at this point Lucario isn’t sure if he can. Mew needs saving, after all.

Lucario decides he’ll follow in Aaron’s footsteps and save Mew, no matter how sad it makes him to have to leave his new friends so early. Ash immediately protests, along with Kidd, and Lucario tells them that it’s a risk he has to take, just like Aaron. Mew and the Tree need his power more than ever now, and he can’t just abandon them. He starts to pour all of his aura into Mew, but it’s not enough. Ash puts on Aaron’s gloves and jumps in, deciding to help out. Lucario is grateful but also very panicked because Ash literally just came back to life—he couldn’t bear losing him a second time, especially since he already lost Aaron. Lucario tries to bump him out of the way but Ash absolutely won’t let him!! If they’re going down they’re going down together. Ash tells him that he can’t watch Lucario take on the burden by himself over and over—that he wants to split the weight and make things even. Cue a very emotional tense moment between two boys about to sacrifice their lives together. Neither of them want the other to die, but they don’t really have a choice. Mew absorbs their power and then…

Lucario wakes up.

And he’s alive. Holy fuck!! (There’s no fucking way I’d kill him nope not happening not this time bitches)

Apparently splitting the burden of giving one’s life energy to another with a second person eases the consequences—leaving both Ash and Lucario alive (which makes him realize that if he’d gone with Aaron all those years ago and split the burden, both of them would have lived. But strangely Lucario wouldn’t trade that opportunity for what he has now.) Ash literally jumps on him and hugs him so tight he nearly dies a second time, but it’s fine. It’s a good way to go.

The tree is safe, and so is Mew. Ash rejoins the others, bringing Lucario with him. They all have a merry little reunion, and then head back to the castle together.

At this point, Ilene thanks Lucario for all he’d done—for Ash and co. and for the tree and Mew. She then sets Lucario free—saying he can do whatever he wishes, he can follow any path in life he wants to now! Suddenly there’s a whole world full of possibilities, and that world is there for him to explore. He can practically hear Aaron encouraging him to take a step into the unknown, journey to his heart’s content, make tons of friends, and master his aura. Except Lucario isn’t really sure he wants to take the trip by himself. He bashfully asks Ash if they’d be alright with him joining them. Ash is absolutely fucking ecstatic, of course. He asks Lucario to teach him how to properly use his aura, and Lucario has a big self revelation moment like “The student has become the master” and it’s magical. So we hit off a brand new adventure with Lucario traveling with Ash, Brock, May, and Max, and teaching Ash how to hone his aura! Which gives us more aura Ash moments, which everybody craves! And it’s kinda gay and lovely!!

And that is my rewrite happy ending for Lucario and the Mystery of Mew thank you goodnight ✌️

14. A Shot in the Dark Part 2

Upfront: It has been a long time since I’ve known somebody who got shot (well enough) to have the exact parameters of how the hospital etiquette is, so I’m basically going to tap into the last time, and since that was about a decade ago and also in my hometown, Idk how far off the way that they handle it is. I’ll try to fill in the spaces with how not as close associates have portrayed their experiences with similar crises and maybe pepper in a little imagination for flow of story. But, the main takeaway is that the chapter has a heavy police presence and I know that can be extremely difficult to digest for people.

He had been crying for most of the night. He wasn’t that adverse to crying. Physically, it was a good release for emotions that the brain was trying to process. He did wish that he could stop for longer than fifteen minutes here and there, but there was too much happening in his heart and mind. It had been two hours. The police had talked to him, then he had to wait for detectives, and they were a “good cop, bad cop” team that he would have expected only in a fictional work, and that was fitting, since none of this felt real. 

The way that Grace’s body shivered in his arms, then just… stopped moving. The way that she wasn’t breathing and he was too scared to let go of her wound to try to administer CPR… The way that he was convinced that he was watching the love of his life die in his arms and the fact that she had been in surgery for two hours and nobody but police and detectives would speak to him about anything, yet, nobody would try to contact her family, despite him repeating to them that she was Ambassador Monroe’s daughter…

3:48 am - At least they had contacted Sunetra. Apparently, she was Grace St. Catherine’s listed emergency contact. She and Xander showed up about an hour after Simon had been sitting there, with the police. Whenever they came in, both of them noticed him and he could see that Xander looked equal amounts of confused, angry, and scared. Sunny was less readable, only seeming to be curious, but rushed over to him, while the police tried to intercept her. “What happened?” she asked, over their shoulders. 

Simon stared at her, glanced at Xander, and even though everything in him wanted to say, “You left her to fucking die is what happened!” Instead, he said very softly, “Grace and I were on a date and she got shot…” Sunny had an emotional response. She began to let tears fall from her eyes, though the rest of her was unresponsive as the police gently guided her away, asking that she and Simon don’t talk.

Xander had a look of… realization and resignation. Simon was gonna cover for them again. He and Sunny could stick with the alibi that they would have used if Grace had been found dead in the alley… “Is she dead?” Xander asked, shaking and crying/

“Surgery…” Simon said, feeling… equal parts bad for him but still extremely pissed off. He knew that he cared, he did know that… but they just LEFT her. They left her to die, not knowing that Simon was there for her, to avenge her nor to save her. They had left her to die in an alley and would have just… moved on without her, like they’d done with Heath. He felt his own tears forming again, angry ones this time around and he wiped at them with his sleeve.  She deserved better. 

At least now, he was ready to make his phone call. He just… didn’t want to potentially be arrested if Grace was gonna be alone. Hopefully, somebody would call her parents. She wasn’t close to them, but she loved them a lot, and they deserved to know where she was. She deserved to have them there for her. “Mom…”

“Simon? Baby, it’s 3 am, what in the world is going on?”

He sobbed and said, “Grace was shot..”

He heard the wind leave his mother like she’d just been hit. “Oh my God, Simon. Baby, I am so sorry. Where are you, I’ll come right down!”

“I’m at the hospital. The police want to talk to me. I’m scared that… That they’ll make me leave her here… that they might arrest me.” There was a pause, and he knew that she was trying to process something… “I was just trying to protect her. I killed somebody… He shot her and I…” He couldn’t finish the sentence. It wasn’t even the fact that he had done it, but telling his mother was… harder than he imagined when he mustered up the courage to call her.

“I’m gonna call the lawyer and come down there. What hospital?”

.

 Simon wrote something on her hand. 

It's not the first thing that she noticed. That was the room. A hospital room.  What happened? For a moment, she didn’t even know who she was, much less where exactly she was and why, but her brain read her surroundings as a hospital room, and whatever happened, she felt very fuzzy headed and resolved not to say anything aloud until she could figure out more about what happened and why.

The second thing that she noticed was the badge.

It had a visceral and sobering affect on her. She thought about the ACAB button on her favorite canvas bag and her body felt actual elevated pain at even seeing the symbol - a symbol she hated and did not trust. The badge holder spoke, seeing that she was now awake, she mentally noted, not caring that she couldn’t POSSIBLY look like she was capable of holding a conversation, because she still was trying to figure out what happened. “Miss St. Catherine?”

“Monroe,” she groaned.  Bitch, was that YOUR voice? She wondered, hearing something that sounded gross and pained come out of her and feeling a tremendous strain as the word flowed from her lips, even as her mind told her not to say THAT. Monroe. She hadn’t used that name in years, but… her brain still automatically spat it out when addressed. “Ugh…” she finally remembered more. Monroe. That’s correct. She had parents and her last name, from them had been Monroe. It took her a while to push out her explanation - both energy and concentration that the badge holder allowed her to power through. “I’m the daughter of Gethsemane Monroe… and Ambrose! Ambrose Monroe. Call him… My father… I’m… hurting…”

The third thing that she noticed was her pain. You’d think it would be instant, but her brain spent so much energy trying to formulate words and connect them to thoughts of questions that she hadn’t. But, by God, now she did.

“You’ve gotten medical attention, but we will contact your parents.”

“Cool. They’ll call the family lawyer.”

“You think that you need a lawyer?”

“I  don’t  think that you should talk to me in my condition. Can hardly think, and I’m in pain. I’ve…”  I’ve been shot! THAT’S what happened. She remembered. Her blood pressure spiked at this realization. “Simon!” Her voice was stronger, in her panic and she moved quite violently, only to realize that she was handcuffed to the hospital bed. Both her wrist and her gsw hurt in that moment and she laid down, breathing hard and holding herself with her free hand.

“Simon Laurent?” The badge holder had been unmoved by her sudden jolt, and unphased by her obvious pain. 

“I hope that whatever is in this IV doesn’t make me forget that you’re trying to talk to me in my condition, after the fact that I asked for my lawyer. I hope that they have a lot to say about me being chained to this bed after getting shot.”

The doctor had arrived to check on her and the detective ducked out, with Grace glaring at him. They brought her blood pressure down, gave her more pain medicine and spoke to her about her injuries and procedures. “Am I going to make it?”

“I think so. Good thing that your friend was there.”

“Simon! Is  he okay?” her pulse shot up. 

“Please try to remain calm, Miss St. Catherine. He wasn’t harmed.” She sighed and rested against the pillow.  That wasn’t what I asked…  But,  that was when she noticed it:

“Remember our last date night! XOXO Simon”  The doctor left the room as she stared at the sloppily written message, knowing that even though it looked shaky and/or rushed that it was Simon’s handwriting and he MUST have written it while she was injured… she knew this was an important message.  Our last date night? Like… last date-date, date night or last “date night” date night? No… not our last date. There’s nothing special about that.  He had recently asked her about their “last date night,” so she knew that must have been what he meant.  Remember our last date night! XOXO Simon… 

She knew what she needed to do. She waited, trying to breathe and meditate, silently hoping and wishing that she knew Simon as well as she knew that he knew her. She looked at the clock in the room. 4:14 am.

.

4:58 am, a VERY handsome couple stormed into the hospital and Simon recognized them immediately. Even if he had never seen the photos, Grace was the spitting image of her mother - the woman didn’t even look old enough to have a daughter her age. They could easily pass for sisters, and with a slight variation of her skin tone and hair texture, they had the exact same face, build, and body language. (Though, Grace's body language most likely mimicked her mom's to pass for normalcy) Her father was… clearly rich, because that woman was definitely out of his league and his style was more of a conservative fashion than the clearly purposely fashionable wife, but that was an earlier thought Simon had… not necessarily one he had on this night. 

The man was slamming his finger onto the counter and speaking very sternly to the poor lady at the desk. Whatever was happening wasn’t her fault, but Simon figured the police had been just as shitty with them as they’d been with him the past couple of hours. The woman turned and noticed him. She came over and his mother took his hand and intertwined their fingers, seemingly to give him strength. They weren’t sure WHAT Grace’s mother was going to say.

“You’re Grace’s boyfriend,” she said. Simon… knew that Grace said her mom was English, but hearing that voice come out of “Grace’s face” was a bit shocking at first. He nodded his head. If Grace hadn’t announced that they had broken up, this wasn’t the time to. Maybe she also hadn’t mentioned that she’d rushed off because he was stalking her. “Do you know what happened?” She wondered.

The police were a lot more accommodating with allowing her to talk to him than they had been with Sunny and Xander, who were also in the waiting room, with officers beside them, and had been presumably questioned when they’d been guided to the detectives earlier. Simon glanced at them and he saw that the police were staring at him, waiting for him to finally say something. If he wasn’t going to answer them, he would maybe answer this woman. He squeezed his mother’s hand and let himself tell her. “Somebody attacked Grace. She was shot,” he pointed to where. “She’s been in surgery. They won’t say more. The man that shot her… He was somebody… that she  knew…  from her past, I think,” he said, tilting his head, hoping that Mrs. Monroe would catch what he meant. She stumbled, ever so slightly, letting him know that she indeed did get it. “I killed him,” Simon said. It was more of a proud declaration than anything else. The woman looked… relieved. Simon didn’t know if he was imagining that for his own ego, or if he was simply too disoriented to note things properly. But soon, the doctor approached Grace’s parents and they rushed down the hallway with him.  She’s alive. She’s okay… Simon felt himself take the first relieved breath that he’d had in hours.

.

5:17 am. Outside of her room, she could hear her parents fussing with someone. The other voice wasn’t very familiar, but she ultimately gathered that it was that badge that had been in earlier. He had a hard voice, which, although he was speaking in a low voice, it cut through the wall and sounded very sinister as he told her parents that she couldn’t receive visitors until they figured out what happened in that alley. An accent of “the Queen’s people,” Grace considered it. She wasn’t that great at telling a lot of those accents apart, and found out that people snobbishly point out that their accents are special. Their accents are different. If they had the Queen listed whenever she looked them up online, she just threw it in a bucket. It was an effort on her part NOT to think about linguistics. In fact, she furrowed her brows that she was thinking about it so naturally just from hearing an Australian accent through a door.  Damn it. 

Her father spoke about the constitution, warned the dick that he  knew the law, and her mother insisted that he was incompetent, subhuman, and corrupt. The door opened and the man returned, leaving her parents outside. 

“Miss Monroe, or Miss St. Catherine, or whoever you wish to be called these days. Your parents have been alerted and they want to see you. Your boyfriend is out there, speaking to my partner. If you want to get your side out, I would suggest that you do so now.”

She frowned.  Her side?  Simon wasn’t telling on her. He wouldn’t. She looked at the note on her hand.  This cop is trying to get under your skin, Grace. 

“People sure do seem to die around you a lot. Hopefully, he'll realize that sooner, rather than later." He adjusted her blanket and smirked, his icy blue eyes seemingly having nothing human behind them as he covered up her still cuffed arm. "But, maybe I'm misunderstanding the facts. Maybe it's  not  what it looks like. Maybe you  weren't trying to attack someone when they shot you in self defense, only to be murdered moments later by some poor fool under your spell."

Now, Grace smirked, but she was in enough pain that it could be mistaken for a wince, if Mace wasn't so receptive. "Yes. You ARE wrong."

"Explain it to me. Simon's certainly explaining it to my partner."

.

Sieve: Just explain to me what happened

Simon: Is Grace okay?

Sieve: Whatever you know, it could only help her.

Simon: (Sighs) I've already told the police and I also told you and your partner. That guy shot her and I shot him. He attacked, I reacted.

Sieve: What led up to it?

Simon: It happened really fast.

Sieve: Start from when you first saw him. We’ve got time. 

Simon: Ummm… he seemed to come out of nowhere to me I don't know. 

 Grace: I spotted him throwing the trash out back there and I recognized him. I thought he might not recognize me, but if he did... I... Didn't want Simon to know. (Lowers her eyes to the note on her palm. Clenches her fist.) He doesn't know about my past. I didn't want him to know that I was... Product... And I certainly never expected to run into the man who had turned me into product…

 Sieve: Did she say who this man was?

Simon: No... She... (Taps into Grace's personality. ‘If I were brainstorming the actions of a character like Grace, how would I outline her response to this line of questioning?’) She seemed paranoid. Secretive. I didn't know him, but I had a feeling that she didn't want me to, so I tried to give her space. I gave them too much of it…

 Grace: I tried to get some distance between Simon and I to get a closer look at the guy. It was dark and I didn't know if my past was playing tricks on my mind. It's been almost 15 years now… I didn't really believe myself to be seeing him again, especially in such a random place as this alley.

Mace: But it was him?

Grace:  (nods head)  It was dark. I was walking up on him and I asked him a question about that day. Are you the nice man with the pinky ring in the white limousine? I asked it out loud before I could stop myself or formulate a more tactful way to handle it.

Mace: And then what?

Grace:  (Looks into his eyes) And then he shot me.

 Simon: I don't KNOW what she said. I don't know what happened. It was dark and they were a little ways away from me. From what I COULD figure, he seemed to be trying to kill her. I simply reacted.

Sieve: By emptying your gun into him?

Simon: That's… that's how I practice at the range. I've been practicing a lot. I'm a pretty good shot. I just... Went into my practice mode. He was running, but I imagined the firing range targets when they move forward.

Sieve: He was running towards you?

Simon:  (Pauses)  No.. the other direction.

Sieve: So, you admit that he was running away when you killed him.

Simon: I… never denied that he was running away… AFTER he tried to kill Grace. (Hands shaking in anger and frustration)

Sieve: But, instead of self defense, as you claimed, this sounds like revenge for shooting your girlfriend.

Simon: If you could only be self-aware enough to realize how absurd that is coming from the police. You all shoot people all the time out of fear. Unarmed people who aren't even being violent. This monster shot at us!

Sieve: At her. After she rushed up to him in the dark, in presumably a confrontational manner.

Simon: Why do you presume that?

Sieve: It sounds like your girlfriend rushed upon this man, if it happened so quickly that you can’t form how exactly it did happen. How far away would you say you were from him?

Simon:  (Flares nostrils)  I didn't measure.

Sieve:  (More pensievely than accusatory)  But, in the dark, with him moving in the opposite direction, you were a very precise shot. It was not well lit, he was an unknown distance away. Your girlfriend was probably on the ground by then. All on short notice, and in a random alley behind this man’s job. You hit him with every bullet in your gun. You didn't miss at all, and still had time to apply pressure to the wound and call 911. 

Simon: I’m a quick thinker and I've been practicing.

 Mace: So, the victim…

Grace: Me?

Mace: The murder  victim.

Grace: The attempted murderer.

Mace: Had ties to someone you knew. Someone we spoke about before. Heath Farmer.

Grace:  (Pulse accelerates. Face becomes firm)  I don't believe that.

Mace:  The night that Farmer died, he had been a part of a b&e, two of the culprits escaped. The homeowner didn't get a good look at them, but noted that they were all dressed alike and wearing masks. Some time later, a man was taken from his home, not to be seen again. His wife, who hadn't been on the scene when Farmer died, described the kidnappers in a similar fashion as Farmer had been dressed that night. Same exact clothing that was removed from your person for surgery.

Grace: (Unbothered) Sounds like they were stylish.

Mace: 148. That's what you told the police whenever you were initially arrested for beating a girl almost to death. 

Grace: A gang member who murdered a small child that police failed to protect.

Mace: Heath Farmer once had a number too, and I'm sure that if I were to go through all of your friends, I would find more numbers. More members of your gang. More murderers…

Grace:  I'm  sure that you’ll find that there is no type of evidence to indicate that  I  have murdered anybody, anywhere. The only thing that you have is the word of someone who described an outfit of some people who maybe tapped into a description that her husband gave her when he spoke about work.

Mace: I never mentioned anything about his work.

Grace: You mentioned that the wife’s description matched Heath's death at his murder scene. Either somebody let a civilian on the premises during an investigation, or the woman's husband was on the scene for work, since she was not, as you were happy to inform me. (Bats her eyes)

Mace:  (Glares) You were able to pin numerous murders on so-called stewards, who wore all black clothes masks to cover their identities, and yet, in several disappearances over the past couple of years, we find the symbol associated with your old gang. The one that you got away with acts of violence by being rich and pretending to be crazy. Several of those same kids who were on the streets were there for a year while you were allowed to sit in a room, dance and draw pictures with crayons. Maybe the ringleader felt bad for abandoning them. Maybe these people who are disappearing are doing so because the princess has decided.

Grace: This is inappropriate. The detective.

Mace: Why would you and Farmer have matching outfits and be near people associated with the old Apex in the middle of the night? More than one occasion, and it be exactly the same as what the witness saw when her husband was taken?

Grace: My date with Simon was after practice last night, and Heath must have stopped by that man’s house on his way to  practice that night.

Mace: Practice?

Grace:  (Deadpan)  We have a dance crew.  (Stare at each other)  You can verify it with the Infinity Train Foundation Center. Sometimes we practice there and most of our performances have been there. For the kids.

Mace: You never said that you had practice on the night of his death.  (Smirks)

Grace: I said that we cancelled some plans to hang out with Simon. Those plans were practice that night. My other friends wanted to size him up and Heath didn't make it to the little meet and greet. Maybe he was as unfortunate as me. Maybe he saw somebody that he just couldn’t stand not to address. Maybe that’s why he was killed, as opposed to wounded or apprehended for questioning. Sure would have made your job easier than this plot of yours to give me details of the investigation. You might think that you’re programming me to know stuff that I’m not supposed to know so that later that knowledge can be used against me, but I promise, I’m not as stupid as you think.

Mace:  (Fumes in frustration as Grace stares at him, emotionless)

Grace: Are you on the take? Is that why you’re so passionately trying to pin cold blooded murder on an internationally recognized children’s book series author?

Mace: Maybe it’s him who’s in your pocket. Unfortunate young man who brings joy to children is a good, strong alibi for a murderous former gang member and child prostitute…

Grace: (Spits in his face) 

“Book me for assault for that if you want to, but you don’t have SHIT else on me,” she hissed. “I can’t wait to tell my lawyer what you just said to an injured SURVIVOR of child trafficking, homelessness and the subsequent street violence brought on by aforementioned abuse. I’m a recovery success story, philanthropist, child welfare advocate, and payer of so many taxes… The way that my dad and the DA might as well be fucking each other, they’re so close, and you take my physically and mentally traumatized body, cuff it to a bed while I’m striuggling for my life, and question and accuse me while I’m under medication... I feel like… You should take a look in the mirror and ask yourself, ``Do you want to fight me?” He wiped his face with her blanket, uncuffed her and left the room.

Her parents were speaking with her lawyer whenever he came out. “Going to take Mr. Laurent to the station for more questioning,” he said.

“What?” Mrs. Laurent wondered, walking up with coffee for Mrs. Monroe that she had gone to fetch while waiting for Simon to finish speaking with the other detective. “Simon already told us all that he did what he did in self defense!” 

“Other things have come to light, namely that the murder victim…”

“The assailant who tried to kill my daughter,” Mrs. Monroe corrected, infuriating him as well as her daughter had.

“WAS affiliated with the organisation that disbanded and became known as the street gang that your daughter was part of…”

Mrs. Laurent gasped. “Street gang? What are you talking about?”

“What he’s talking about is something that he has no legal RIGHT to talk about and now you’ve just slandered my daughter to a woman who only knows her after her terribly haunting childhood of being forced into a life of crime.” Mrs. Laurent’s eyes were already red from crying, and now they were simply confused, as well. “Mrs. Laurent… Our legal team already has representatives here on behalf of Grace. I’m more than happy to extend their services to Simon, as well.”

“I don’t know that we can afford something like that…” the woman said. 

Mrs. Monroe doubted that Simon would have a problem with good legal representation, as she definitely already researched his net worth, but it was true that he didn’t have a team like the one that they did. “Don’t be silly. Our children come first, and it's clear that they are under attack right now. Why else would we be even be entertaining the notion that two beloved pillars of the community are somehow orchestrating a conspiracy theory to…” she gave Mace a look, “What were the claims? Killing a child trafficking gang member?” She finally took her coffee from Mrs. Laurent’s shaking hand, blew on it and took a sip, staring at Detective Mace, for dramatic effect.

It burned her tongue, but she didn’t flinch. 

Sieve came from the room that he had been allowed to use in order to speak with Simon and he and Mace touched base, going over the discussions. Simon hugged his mother and Mrs. Monroe stared at the detectives. Her husband approached with the DA on his cell phone to speak with Mace. They watched as he stammered and tried to explain things, then he handed the phone back and punctuated with conversation (pointed at Simon), with, “We’ll be in touch if further questioning comes about. At this moment, no charges will be filed.”

Simon’s eyes smiled and he politely said, “Thank you so much, for everything that you do to keep citizens safe.” Mace knew he was being sarcastic, though there was nothing to prove it and the Monroes had just made it clear that this entire lot would be a unified effort. In fact, the woman was rubbing Simon’s back and talking kindly to him while his mother offered him her coffee cup. Mace left angrily. Sieve seemed less upset, but he always was. 

The police were going to stay around for a while, and Grace was only allowed 3 visitors at a time. First, she saw her parents and the lawyer. Then, she saw Sunny, Xander, and Jalicia had come in too, by then. Then, her mom brought Mrs. Laurent in and the woman was trying to be very strong about having had it sprung on her this morning about Grace’s past and the entire situation with the police and things. Grace was extremely tired by the time that Simon finally got around to coming in. So tired, that she only saw his face, smiled, held his hand and fell to sleep, with him and the clock watching over her. 8:41 am.

15. I Trust Him With My Life

PENN BADGLEY. THIRTY. CISMALE. HE/HIM. ) in texas, WESTLEY THORN is known to most as WEST. they have been riding with the REAPERS for TEN YEARS. they originally from STRATFORD and the ENFORCER is known to be very RECKLESS & VINDICTIVE but the other club members will tell you they are DEVOTED & ECCENTRIC. as the years go by, they’ve gained a lot of respect in the club and around town. they rarely ever drive a car but when they do KILL OR BE KILLED BY NEW YEARS DAY is usually heard blasting. ( A CRUEL AND CROOKED SMILE, BLOODIED KNUCKLES THAT NEVER HEAL, AN UNDYING LONELINESS. ) [ JUNE. 23. GMT+2. SHE/HER. ]

[ VIOLENCE, ABANDONMENT, CRIME, DRUGS && DOUCHEBAGGARY TW ]

basics.

* mostly goes by west, sometimes wes if you’re cute

* biromantic / bisexual

*  undying loyatly to the reapers 

*  currently the enforcer && will die for any of the members 

*  enjoys violence a little too much

*  mostly lives at the clubhouse but owns a shitty apartment that needs to be burned down 

*  incredibly reckless && does not value his life

* will only ever ride his bike, will not ever drive a car && will only be a passenger in one

*  substance abuse ??? possibly 

*   has violent felonies on his criminal record && will do it again

*   loyal to a very dangerous fault  

*   here for a good time not a long time 

about.

✘ abandonment issues would be the primary source when analyzing westley. the typical and tragic tale of a boy who seemed to be strangers with his own blood. his parents, far too focused on their own careers, never seemed to be around. while they provided him with the basic necessities, he was always alone. secluded in his own home left him feeling trapped, seeking attention on his own in all the worst ways.

✘ he didn’t care what it was or how he got it, he needed – no, desperately craved attention from others. most of the time, fist fights seemed to suffice. the adrenaline rush would satisfy him for a short moment, however it always quickly died out.

✘ if it wasn’t fighting, it was crawling his way into others beds, trying to fake some sort of love and affection without ever fully committing himself to anyone. he was selfish, incredibly so, he wanted to be loved and adored only to kick them out the next morning.

✘ somewhere down the line, when he barley managed to graduate high-school, he came into contact with a member of the reapers ( possible connection ). while he always knew of their existence, and in fact envied their group, he never knew anyone from that scene – but as soon as the connection was made joining the reapers easily became his new obsession. he was a simple hang around for the longest time, slowly building up relationships where he could, he moved onto prospect before finally becoming patched in by age twenty.

✘ the reapers was everything he wanted, the family he always longed for with seemingly the same interests and lifestyle that he had grown accustomed to. with this new found family a new sense of loyalty seemed to develop, in fact his loyalty and devotion to the club was undying. he would do anything, no questions asked.

✘ as the years went by, so did west move up in ranks. it was never intentional, he didn’t particularly strive for anything, he just went where he was needed. he moved up from rider to solider, and eventually up to enforcer. west is the type to shoot first and ask questions later. if someone was pointed out to him he would throw the first punch, never needing to know the reason why. he loves his club, scarily so.

✘ while his loyalty is his strong suit, it is also his downfall. west does not know how to let go of a grudge. once you wrong him, or someone he cares for, that’s it. he will find any reason to fuel his grudge, any small detail to validate any sort of vengeance. he cannot forgive and he cannot forget, west is simply not wired that way.

✘ west has the tendency to be incredibly reckless, he will simply do things purely for the thrill of it all. he rarely thinks things through and will act on impulse.

✘ westley tends to sleep around a lot, many of them never becoming anything more. he tells himself he’s fine with that, but in reality he wants something more. he wants genuine love but he can’t seem to allow himself to feel that way about someone else. that’s what he tells himself at least. while he’s had serious relationships, many of them tend to end up in flames. wes cannot hold down a healthy relationship and tends to develop rather toxic behavior and habits. he easily becomes obsessive and paranoid that ruins everything. ( fun fact he’s very much bisexual )

[ CONNECTIONS ]

✘ LOYALTY -- ok so applies to everyone in the club so come and love me bUT also potentially ppl outside of the club too k thnks let him die for u thanks

✘ FIRST LOVE && HEARTBREAK [  open idk  ] – i imagine wes, somehow, fell seriously in love with someone. however, the odds were not in his favour. whether the love was unrequited, or for some reason or the other the two could not be together or their relationship did not last long – west was left devastated. this completely wrecked him and he cannot find it in himself to fully forgive this person (whether or not they actually hurt him is besides the point). he holds a lot of ill feelings towards this person, despite deep down still  having feelings for them. i wanna leave this one open so that we can plot it out !! since he’s bisexual im fine with whomever for this plot tbh

✘ HOOKUPS / GROUPIES [  OPEN  ] – west is a hoe, he has needs, he likes to sleep around && most importantly he needs attention. behind closed doors he will be the most affectionate and loving he can be, but your ass is out of his room come morning. minus a few exceptions here and there

✘ PAST RELATIONSHIPS / EXES  [  OPEN  ] – he has tried many times at relationships and has failed nearly every time. some have ended on good terms, others on bad. again leaving these ones open for plotting!

✘ BEST FRIENDS / RIDE OR DIE  [  OPEN  ] – somehow, west has managed to become genuine friends with someone, someone who can actually stand him for long periods of time. i imagine a lot of his ride or dies to be of course fellow reapers, but i can imagine some civilians as well !!

✘ ENEMIES  [  OPEN  ] – oh, this is a given. he has pissed off a lot of people, and i imagine there is a good amount of people he holds a grudge against. especially from the rival groups this would fit lmao also rival club lets go 

✘ PAST FRIENDS  [  OPEN  ] – before he joined the reapers i imagine he must of left a few people behind in order to pursue his new life.

IM REALLY TIRED AND THIS IS ALL I CAN THINK OF AT THIS TIME BUT PLS !! I AM HERE FOR ALL THE PLOTS OK BYE XXX