#finishing art I've abandoned for a year | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hunnylagoon · 4 months

Text

Right Where You Left Me

Pt 4: The Sweetest Thing to Ever Scare You (Finale)

Ellie Williams x reader

I remember when I first saw you. I remember looking into your warm almond eyes and feeling butterflies in my stomach. But soon, when I looked into your eyes, I no longer felt the same warmth that I once knew. It felt as though you had killed all of the butterflies inside my stomach but yet, I still loved you.

Premise: You and Ellie are childhood best friends until you drift apart. Funny thing about soulmates is they tend to find their way back to each other. You and Ellie try to end the tireless war between you.

Warnings: Angst / drinking / violence / not really religious mentions in this one

Part one here!

Part two here!

Part three over here!

Guys I thought I posted this two days ago but I actually just saved it to drafts. Sorry for being an idiot lmao

I think that I have unlearned how to love.

That’s not even a word but there is no other way to tell you that I have turned myself cold.

Without partying to distract me and religion to fill in gaps of emptiness, I isolate myself and begin to write once again. I'm almost certain that my body has been telling me to write, that I need to pour myself into art as opposed to a girl I was friends with a million years ago.

I figure that I need to create rather than destroy but it might take me a while to do so.

The morning after I abandoned my faith on the church floor, I had woken up and expected Ellie to be gone, however, she was wide awake and playing subway surfers on her phone. Her hair is messy and her eyes are half-lidded.

She turns to look at me when she feels the shuffling of the bedsheets; despite her doing nothing more than smile at me it is like an understanding passed between us, war is over.

Almost.

It's like I've forgotten how to be soft, I can't manage to get the words out that I need to, and the thought of it alone makes me cringe. "Breakfast?" I ask, unsure of what else to say.

Ellie passes on it and I awkwardly excuse myself, saying that I got called in to take a brunch shift at work. Of course, this is not true. What I do is get into my car and drive and drive until I get mad at myself for burning gas.

The war between Ellie and I had ended but it didn't register in my head, I almost fell in love with it. Without the constant arguing and passive aggressiveness, there was nothing to put a wall between us and I wasn't ready to be vulnerable again.

So I begin to feed Ellie the ugliest parts of me; I show her everything I'm sure she will hate but she doesn't, she's patient and shows me the kindness I have been looking everywhere for. Still, I am cold to her, I don't know what else to do.

I try to push her away all over again but this time, she doesn't let me. Ellie comes into my room when I'm studying to sit on my bed so that she can be in proximity to me. Sometimes she'll ask me if I want to go for a walk or a late-night gas station run, all of the things we used to do.

When I'm angry at her, she lets it happen, she won't escalate the fight all she does is apologize and does what she can to fix it. Everything feels like it's in order again, Joel even starts to send me little text messages to check in on me and sends me Facebook memes that make him think of me.

As of now, we are setting up for Dina's twenty-first birthday. The living room, typically a space for casual gatherings and movie nights, had undergone a transformation. Vibrant streamers adorned the walls, and an array of balloons in assorted hues scattered themselves along the floor "Are balloons too childish?" Abby asks as she walks out of her bedroom.

"They better not be after I just spent half an hour doing all of these," Cat answers, giving her a scornful glare.

"They look great, Cat," I smile and give her a thumbs-up from where I am in the kitchen dumping bags of chips into bowls. "Should I make a veggie platter?"

Cat furrows her eyebrows "If you can finish it by yourself, sure."

"Cat, we aren't children, adults eat vegetables," Abby takes a seat on the couch behind Cat, investigating the hard work she's put into making the living room look nice for just one night "Isn't it weird that Dina is organizing her own surprise party?"

I shrug, placing a wooden cutting board down on the kitchen counter "I don't blame her, I don't think we've always been one hundred percent reliable, me specifically."

"But it's not a surprise if she knows about it."

"So?" Cat asks.

"So why are we calling it a surprise party if it isn't a surprise?"

"Why not?"

"Well, why can't we just call it a party?"

"I don't think it matters," I cut in, I begin to peel carrots and slice them up into quarters. Ellie comes out of her bedroom, she took a nap after completing her physics presentation, her hair in a messy bun, and she's in her typical pyjama uniform of sweats and a hoodie. "Hey, Ellie," I smile at her.

She rubs some sleep away from her green eyes "Hey," Ellie walks over to the kitchen island where I slice and chop vegetables and sits right in front of me. Even half asleep she looks like a statue of marble carved by a skilled hand.

Abby raises an eyebrow, asking 'When did you guys become friends?' without saying it and then it hits me like the plane in Lost. Ellie still hasn't told anyone about our history, our sixteen years of friendship is invisible to the eyes of those who think they know us well.

I'm broken from my thoughts when Abby speaks up "When are you picking up the cake?"

My heart drops "I'm not?"

Cat and Abby cast one another side glances while Ellie snatches a cucumber off my cutting board "Dina was handing out duties and you said you would take care of the cake."

I freeze, unsure of what to say "Nuh-uh." I shake my head like a child denying blame for breaking her mother's favourite dish.

"Yuh-huh," Cat shoots back. "How could you forget that?"

My mind fumbles for an excuse and somehow I land on "I forgot because I went temporarily insane from Lyme disease," What am I saying? "I got Lyme disease because I go camping in secret," I don't camp "And I never told you guys that I go camping because I'm deeply ashamed of it."

Now everyone looks perpetually confused, Ellie included "What are you talking about?" Abby asks, her eyebrows furrowed.

"Okay-well," I place my knife flat on the counter by the wooden cutting board, ignoring the odd spiel I just went on "I'm going to drive to-

"You dropped your car off for a suspension repair yesterday," Abby reminds me.

"Ellie is going to drive me to get a cake," I correct myself "I will be back to finish making my veggie plate." I quickly rinse my hands before grabbing Ellie's keys from the little jewelry dish on the island and yank the sleeve of her hoodie to pull her along.

Ellie doesn't say anything, she slips into some Crocs and we walk outside to her car. "Where are we headed?"

"Uh, hang on," In Ellie's passenger seat, I go on Google Maps to look up the closest bakeries that are still open at this hour, there are two, one a couple of streets away and the other one is across town and closing in twenty minutes. "Infectious Confections," I wrinkle my nose "That's a weird fucking name."

While Ellie tries to make conversation in the car I only speak when giving her directions to the bakery. She knows something is up and I can tell by the way she keeps glancing at me. I just can't manage to get it out of my head that she's still keeping me a secret.

She pulls up to the bakery and I get out before she even turns her car off, she pulls the keys out of the ignition and trails behind me through the doors.

The bakery itself was rustic and clean, there were two display cases and tills one of the displays held danishes, croissants, cookies, scones and whatever those little swirly flakey things are called. The other display had a big chalk menu above it that read 'Cakery' Though what was in the display case was very sparse.

"Hi," I walk up to the till, putting on the friendly smile and customer service voice that I usually only use at work. "This is pretty short notice but I was wondering if you had any cakes left or if I could get one made for today?"

The guy behind the counter is a scrawny teenager who looks like he has had a long enough day of dealing with annoying customers "We close in half an hour, there's not enough time to bake and decorate a cake." He explains it like he's said this to a million people, he's bored of the same phrases that his manager has scripted out for him.

"Any shot that someone didn't pick up their cake?" I ask, fingers crossed in the hope that he says yes.

"Let me talk to my manager," His voice drags on, and he turns around and disappears through a commercial kitchen door. I wait patiently, hands balled together in front of me as I rock back and forth on my heels. A minute or two later he comes back holding a bright blue cake with pink detailing of bows and mustaches, there's text on it that reads 'It's a...' gender reveal cake. "This is all we have left, they cancelled last minute.

I look back at Ellie to get her opinion, her eyebrows are furrowed slightly "Maybe we good just get some of those cupcakes and smush them together and smear the icing so it looks like a cake."

I wave her off "I'll buy it," I say this only because it is 5:41 and with each passing minute I am growing desperate, also I don't want Jesse to be disappointed that I fumbled the cake and ruined his girlfriend's birthday.

Angsty teenager puts the bright blue monstrosity into a cake box and charges me an absurd total for it, I bitterly tap my card on the machine.

As I walk back out to Ellie's car I take a brief moment to look at the sky, it's the same hue as cotton candy and looks as if it had been projected from a watercolour painting, even after I get back into the car and Ellie begins to blast her old dad rock songs, I can't tear my eyes away from it.

After five minutes of silence from my end, Ellie finally asks the question that's been burning into the forefront of her brain "Why are you being weird?"

"Why haven't you told anyone that we met before we moved in together?"

Her dark eyebrows furrow "You haven't told anyone either-

"Yes, I have."

"Who?"

"Yara, Stacy, Kayla, Mitch, Nigel, Carmen, literally everyone from my work," I admit "I just haven't told people who know you personally so it can't make its way back to you because you clearly don't want people to know."

She falls silent, searching her mind for the right words. She clutches the steering wheel tight and looks dead ahead at the car's bumper-to-bumper ahead of us. "I just know how to slip it into conversation."

"I don't think it's that hard, you can just say that we were friends, you don't need to give an intricate play-by-play of everything that happened."

"Why is it important that people know if we're cool again?"

I turn my head to slowly look at her "You are the one who always said 'If we don't have honesty, we have nothing at all'," I point out.

Silence strings between us again, I almost want to throw up.

'We're cool again' Nope, not anymore, we are so very far from cool. Instead of Ellie casting me little glances as she had on the ride there, she ignores my presence almost completely while I glare daggers at her. Was she embarrassed by me? When we went to lunch together why did she lie to Dina about where she was? When she slept in my bed why did Cat ask me if I knew why Ellie came home at eight AM with nothing, not even a key? Did she crawl through my bedroom window to walk around to the front door and pretend she was just getting home?

AND WHY DIDN'T I CALL HER OUT?

She was keeping me a secret and that realization hurt worse than any injury I had ever suffered. She hasn't even told her dead who practically raised me that we lived together.

God, we weren't even anything and she was keeping me under wraps like I was some disgraceful secret that she would get shamed for holding. The very second she approached our house, I got out of her car, she hadn't even stopped it completely but cake in hand, I hopped out of her car door and didn't look back.

I think I've had my fair share of partying.

After that month-long bender I had where I went to clubs every night and replaced food with vodka, I never wanted to even look at another solo cup full of liquor. Instead of drinking, smoking, or doing karaoke, I hide from Ellie.

I hide from her in conversations and sometimes sneak into my bedroom just to get a bit of breathing room from all of the strangers in my house. Wherever Ellie was, I was not. If she was outside, I was inside, if she was in the living room, I was in the kitchen enjoying my veggie platter.

Have you ever been the only sober person around in a group of people? If the answer is no, have you ever babysat a houseful of toddlers? Because it's just about the same thing.

When I'm not hiding from the girl who wriggled her way back into my good graces just to trip herself off the podium, I'm cleaning up, protecting our furniture, holding back hair as girls I've never met sob into the toilet, and stopping the drunk from doing stupid things.

"Hey, buddy," I take my can of hairspray that this frat-adjacent man is holding behind an ignited lighter "I don't think you would look good as a burn victim," His friends moan in disappointment as I do so, they were very excited to see a makeshift flamethrower; I wasn't in the mood to have my house burn down, or have a guy with peach fuzz waste my thirty dollar hair spray.

Thirty dollars?

Note to self for later: Make smarter spending choices (And smarter relationship choices!).

I felt a tap on my shoulder only to turn around and see Dina, she wasn't drunk, just tipsy "Smile!" She holds up a camera to her eye and clicks the shudder button before I even have a chance to react the flash goes off. A large Polaroid begins to print out, Dina snatches it and shakes it until you can see my silhouette, my eyes are wide, my hair flying behind me from the quick turn of my head and I'm holding a can of hairspray angled to look like I'm going to spray the camera with it "Cute!" She smiles, tucking it into her pocket for later "Wait, I want a group picture of the roommates."

Dina takes my hand and pulls me to one of the couches where Ellie and Abby sit with some guy, she shoes him to get up and drags Cat over to replace him, she stands me in between Ellie and Abby and lightly pushes me down to sit wedged between the two.

"Jesse, please do not do me dirty with this picture," She hands the pink Polaroid camera to her boyfriend and quickly ushers herself to the far left of the couch where she bends over to kiss Cat on the cheek for the picture. Ellie and I are stiff and awkward when the flash goes off.

After the picture is taken, Ellue turns to face me just the slightest "Hey, I think we should talk-

"I think it's time for cake!" I push myself off the couch and usher myself to the kitchen.

I pull the cake out of the fridge, looking at what I had done to salvage it; Below the part that said 'It's a...' I wrote '21 year old!' in chocolate pre-made Betty Crocker icing that I had in the fridge for months, it didn't look the best, but it could've been worse.

Dina, of course, cackles when she sees it. To her, it is the funniest thing she's seen all night. I stick the candles in and light it with the light I confiscated from peach fuzz frat boy and push the cake towards Dina after tucking the light back into my pocket, she is illuminated in the glow of iPhone flash all filming her.

"Make a wish!"

Age Sixteen- Grade 11

I think back to how embarrassing it felt to be thoughtful.

How fragile I felt when I would share my feelings and how frail I seem when I do it now. Ellie was always tougher than I was, in rugby, in fights, just in general. That's why I figured she would be taking it better than me when I cut contact, once again I have been proven wrong.

"Conner, can we please just leave?" I pleaded with my then-boyfriend. The night had started fine but after a couple of drinks Ellie and I were becoming increasingly hostile to one another, it wasn't my intention to speak to her but the universe forced my hand when we were shoved into a circle of our friends and made to converse around the bonfire at the beach.

The salty breeze carried the sounds of laughter and the gentle crashing of waves, the scent of roasted marshmallows wafted through the air.

"What, you need your boyfriend's permission or something?" Ellie held a can of berry blast Smirnoff, staring into my soul from the other side of the fire, the sparks glitter through the night like fireflies. Her words don't feel too bad but they don't feel too good either.

I cast her a glare before I looked back to my boyfriend "Please?"

He is getting perpetually annoyed with me he shrugs away from my grasp, "Fuck off, we just got here," He mutters, Conner must think I couldn't hear it. He had already downed three Bud lights and a couple of shots of cheap vodka, now he is nursing another beer in hand.

"Excuse me?" I say, narrowing my eyes. Everyone around the fire pauses their conversation to tune into mine. "Come on," I stand up and try to pull him along so we can have a conversation away from the prying eyes of our friends.

I can't pull the mass of the 6'2 quarterback along with me but he obliges and follows me where I yank him. As I drag him along the rest of the group giggle and makes jokes along the lines of 'Trouble in paradise' but Ellie is the only one who doesn't jump back into mindless conversation, her unnerving eyes are still on me while I chew my boyfriend out by the shoreline.

"Why do I have to leave just because you're feeling a little bummed out?"

I'm almost floored at out someone can lack so much empathy "Because you're my boyfriend?" I can feel myself tensing up.

"Why does that mean you can't get up and leave on your own?" He defends "You begged me to come here and now I just wanna down a couple of beers and hang out with my friends."

"You've already drank like twenty!" I retort.

"It's a fucking party!" Conner says, raising his voice "It's a party and it's summer and you're seriously trying to tell me not to have fun?"

"Fuck!" I shout in frustration "Why don't you ever call me? Why can't you ever let me in?" The argument is quickly escalating "Why didn't you tell me that you kissed Tamar and why haven't you told me that you love me?"

"Because I don't."

My words fail me. I knew he didn't, I knew that he hardly even liked me. My dad had thought so highly of him, she said he was the type of guy to rescue a baby from a burning building but as I look at him now, I figure that he eats babies.

I almost open my mouth to say something different, almost, but I don't. The rest of my life might have turned out differently if I didn't, I might've been able to salvage the rotting corpse of my relationship with Ellie but I didn't. "Fine," I say, voice calm and quiet "Let's stay."

Before that night I had never really gotten drunk but the second I got back to the bonfire, I was digging through the cooler and shotgunning canned Smirnoff. "Woah," Riley laughs "Someone's finally being a bad influence."

I got myself so shit-faced that when everyone else got up to dance to the music blaring through the Bluetooth speaker, I sat by myself at the shoreline, looking bitterly out towards to ocean while the tides crash at my feet and get sucked back into the ocean. For a moment I think about jumping in and letting my lax body get washed away and sink beneath the surface until I wash up as a water-bloated corpse that some nine-year-old will find when they're beach combing.

My mouth tastes like peroxide and blood, my lungs burn with a red-hot pain. The wind is becoming increasingly harsh and I ignore the hair that is tangled into my golden hoop earrings.

"Wow, you look awful," I don't need to turn around to know who it is.

"Can you just fuck off?" I say "I don't give a shit about you, just leave me alone."

She always had to antagonize me, Ellie went out of her way to stray from the group and bother me. It had something to do with the alcohol in her system. Despite her alleged hatred for me, she takes a seat next to me regardless.

"Fuck, you're so sensitive," She scoffs "I don't know why you're dating him, I'm not even sure why you'd want to fuck him unless you're too lazy to jerk off-

My hands think before my head and I deck Ellie right in the side of her face, getting a solid hit to her cheekbone. My hand flies over my mouth "I'm sorry, I-

Ellie doesn't waste any time in lunging back at me, she pushes me down by my shoulders until my back is in the shallow of the water that moments ago just splashed at my feet and takes a swing. The impact of her punch almost knocks me sober.

I take a sharp inhale, grabbing her elbows and pulling her down to where she was the one on her back and I was the one straddling her. I land one last blow to her nose, I hear a crunch and the panic immediately sends me scrambling to my feet. My eyes go wide at the blood dripping down, her face I turn to run but Ellie is faster, she grabs me by my hair and yanks me down further into the water with her.

"Fucking cunt!" I cry, though my scream is drowned out by the overwhelmingly loud tides crashing on the shore "Get the fuck off me!"

Ellie is better at fighting than I am, I had never been on this side of her before, usually, I had been the one to drag her away from fights but now I am the one who is going to stumble home numb from the devastating pain.

Frankly, I'm fucking scared.

She continues to drag me by my hair until I'm knee-deep in the water with her, she almost throws her entire weight into me, dunking me beneath the surface where her bony hands snake around my neck. My eyes have gone blurry with the salt water, they sting and burn. I can't see anything, all I can do is uselessly thrash beneath her. My hands push against her face, trying to pry her off my body.

Eventually, I manage to claw her face with my fingernails, I dig deep enough that it breaks skin and she recoils just enough for me to knee her in the stomach and let me get out from under her. Just as I try to slip away she reaches for my hair again, but instead of tugging on my hair, she rips out my gold hoop earring. I screech out in agony, hand reaching for where the metal sliced through the lobe of my ear, I shudder in pain; my cries are now jagged and harsh.

This is the exact moment Ellie begins to regret what she's done. "Fuck, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to." Her tone softens and she tries to approach me but I back away from her like a frightened dog.

"Get away from me!" Despite the pain surging in my body, I find the strength in me to hit her again, she staggers back tripping into the water. I hit her so hard that I feel a crack in my knuckle and I yelp out in the immediate shock of pain.

I wasn't sure when the others had noticed this was happening probably because my vision had gone blurry from salt water and adrenaline but before Ellie could hit me again, she was being restrained by Riley and Kennedy while some guy who I had probably had two conversations with dragged my back to shore.

I keel over on my hands and knees and begin to start retching onto the sand. Laila rubs a gentle hand on my back, my hair sticking wet on my forehead. A seagull, disturbed by the commotion, took flight, its wings cutting through the charged air.

Next to the pile of vomit I just heaved, blood drips down from my ear, pooling and then soaking into the sand. My neck swells from what is still the raw sensation of Ellie closing her hands around it.

I look up at Ellie, there is blood that has dripped its way into her mouth, clinging to her white teeth. She has what almost looks like a cat scratch running down her cheek, blood begins to prick and spill from the lacerations.

She stares back at me and we don't say a word but we understand each other clearly, I never want to see you again.

"Let's go," Ellie grabs my arm as Dina begins to slice the cake "We're gonna fix this right now."

"Ellie, there are so many people here," I say in a hushed tone so people can't hear me.

"I don't mean here," She looks at me, face expressionless "Just get in my car."

"Excuse me?" I say, tone accusing "Did you just order me to get in your car?"

"Fuck," She sighs, dropping my wrist to rub her hands down her face "Please can you get in my car so we can work this through."

"There's nothing to work through," I retort "You're embarrassed by me or you still secretly hate me and that's fine, I meant what I said on winter break about the lease, the second it's up, I'm getting the fuck out of here."

"What? No, don't- just," She takes a breath, reevaluating what to say "I have a point to make but I can't make it unless you get in my car."

We stare at each other for a moment, I narrow my eyes and she is still unmoving. Every scenario runs through my head of what could be waiting for me in that car.

"Fine."

I sit silently in her passenger seat, my knees are pulled into my chest and I rest my chin on them. Ellie doesn't say anything either as she drives. I watch each traffic light pass me, every street name to try and make sense of where we are going.

I almost feel like I'm going to suffocate beneath the silence of everything going left unsaid.

When I spot the boardwalk up ahead, I know exactly where she's taking me "Ellie, why are we at the beach?" I give her a side glance "Do I need to take out my earrings?"

Heat rises to her cheeks when I say this, "Not yet," She jokes, getting out of her car and grabbing a tote bag from the back seat, and I follow in tow.

We walk past the boardwalk and onto the sandy beach, I'm already not feeling whatever she's doing; there is sand filling up my Converse and a slight wind chill, I'm really wishing I had a hoodie right now. "Can you tell me what we're doing yet?" I'm hugging myself in an attempt to stay warm "If we're still walking on the beach why couldn't we have just walked on the boardwalk instead? It literally has walk in the name." I'm already going off on one of my tangents.

She still walking ahead of me but she briefly turns around to face me "Can you just stop asking questions for a minute?"

"Okay, whatever," I mutter, trailing behind her still. I can hardly see in the night, the only light to guide us is the moon and the warm ceiling lamps from restaurants along the boardwalk. I can vaguely see Ellie's silhouette, she's outlined by the gentle glow radiating off the moon, I try my best not to stumble over things poking out of the sand that have been lost to sight by darkness.

"Okay," Ellie stops, "Here we are."

"Where are we?" I ask "I can't see shit, I don't know where here is."

Ellie digs around in her pocket for her phone and turns on a flashlight and it reveals a small iron firepit that was cemented into a slab of concrete in the sand. She hands me her phone so I can keep the flash on her and she can see what she's doing.

She pulls out some pages ripped out from her notebook "Can you hand me your lighter?"

My eyebrows furrowed, and I felt around in my pocket wondering if I even had one. I did, it had slipped my mind that I still had the bic lighter that I confiscated from Peach Fuzz. I hand the lighter to her and watch as she tucks the pages beneath logs that were in the firepit before we arrive, they are somewhat charred but still viable.

She flicks the lighter to ignite it and the paper catches immediately. The initial flicker grew into a tentative blaze, licking at the edges of the kindling. The crackling sound echoed through the night.

Once she is sure the fire can survive without her feeding it, she steps away. "Alright, let's have it out."

"Like sex?" I scrunch up my nose.

"Oh my god, no, like let's talk this through." She pinches her nose bridge, taking a breath in before exhaling and putting her hand back down "We're gonna recreate the night of the bonfire how it should've been," Ellie reached back into her bag and pulled out two white claws "I snagged these from Dina's party, sorry this was kind of last minute."

I can't help the smile that grows on my face, I take one of the white claws and crack it open "I don't know how authentic this is gonna be if there isn't any canned Smirnoff."

I think back to exactly how that night played out and I take a seat on the sand, facing the crashing dark ocean. I sip my white claw, as expected Ellie takes a seat next to me, just what happened on the actual night.

"Wow," She says "You look really pretty and I'm an idiot for ever saying you looked awful," Ellie looks gorgeous illuminated by the orange light of the fire, and the breeze causes her flyaway hairs to drift in the wind. "I'm an asshole for pretending that I didn't know you, I was scared I would get hurt again and take it to heart like I did last time. I promise the second we get home that I'll come clean."

I don't know if I can deal with this sugary philosophy. She's being so sweet that it's rotting my teeth.

"Ellie," I say gathering my thoughts, it was so hard being honest with my feelings, it felt like I would get hospitalized if I showed any emotion. "I was so in love with you in high school that it killed me, and I was terrified that my parents would throw me out well, they did- but that's why I pushed you away and there isn't a day that goes by where I don't regret it."

The surprise on her face morphs into a soft smile "What about now?" she asks "Do you still love me?"

I shrug, it's honest "I dunno, but I think there's room to try."

She looks from me to the ocean and the way the moonlight glitters off the surface "What happened next?" Ellie toys with the tab of her drink "Did you hit me?"

"Yeah," I say softly, following her gaze out to the waters "But if we're doing the night how it should've been, I'd rather just kiss you."

Ellie turns her head back to look at me. She shoves her white claw into the sand then takes my face into one of her hands and kisses me like it's her job, so tender and carefully like she's afraid I will break beneath pressure.

How weak have I become? My heart is so full of her that I can hardly call it my own.

A/N: Be grateful for this ending because I was very tempted to give you guys an unhappy one. Sorry that I forgot to post this lol, I’m sad this series is over but excited to show you all my next one which may be the angst-iest yet 👀

Thanks for reading!

Tag list: @elliesaturnsoftdrink @elliesaesp @melanie-watermelon @yalaysbee @laundrybag29 @readbydayana @skylerwhitwyo @lmaoo-spiderman @joliettes @kittnii @taylorgracies @sameenatruther @mikellie @belles-hell @fullmachinegirl @eveshyper @whosmica

502 notes · View notes

scifrey · 4 months

Text

NINE-TENTHS

Oh my gosh, the book is now officially out! This is the first original novel I've published since 2018 and I am very excited and very nervous to share it.

☕♥️🐉

➡️ You can read it here. ⬅️

Chapters drop Wednesdays and Saturdays, and if you're worried, the story is already finished and fully uploaded. This is not a WIP that I will abandon later--it's totally complete.

About the book:

Twenty-four is one year too young for a quarter-life crisis, but hey, Colin's always been an overachiever. He's got a degree in Sustainable Tourism, which his family says he's wasting as a barista, an annoying anxiety disorder, and no freaking idea what to do with his life. The only thing going his way is the cute coffee shop regular, a homo draconis named Dav (who, in his humanshape, is a total hottie.) Still, it'd be easier if Dav didn't have a habit of accidentally setting things on fire when he's startled. Like the café kitchen.

When Dav breaks draconic taboo and volunteers as a replacement bean-roaster to apologize for the inferno meet-ugly, sparks really fly. Everything's finally happening for Colin, until he learns that hooking up with Dav means that under dragon law, Colin is absorbed into Dav's hoard.

Possession may be nine-tenths of the law, but becoming his boyfriend's property does not make this whole identity crisis thing easier. Especially now that Colin must navigate politics, paparazzi, and legal questions about his personhood. Colin's still angling for his Happily Ever After, but the growing scrutiny on his relationship with Dav threatens their budding romance. And if he's not careful, Colin's fight for agency may just destroy symbiotic human/dragon relationships worldwide.

Beautiful cover art by @seancefemme

201 notes · View notes

the-fiction-witch · 5 months

Text

Y/n!

Media The Artful Dodgert

Character Jack Dawkins

Couple Jack X Reader

Rating Flirty

Requested : I absolutely love your Jack Dawkins fic, I've just added your Newt fic to my library. You are an absolutely amazing writer.This is also a request for the jack Dawkins fic, as in could you write one where jack is reunited with someone who he knew back in London?? I just think it would be cute and you can do anything you want from there, anything you want haha Thank you for writing xxxx

I sighed finishing up with the ward rolling my sleeves up heading towards the stairwell,

"Jack. Patient. Room four," Hetty said having come chasing after me,

"What about them?"

"She's refusing to let Dr Sneed see her."

I sighed, great last thing I need some little whiner, "Will she let me see her?"

"She says yes."

"Alright," I sighed heading back down and quickly went to room four, "Hello Miss, Dr Dawkins, I heard you refused Dr Sneeds treatment?" I asked taking her paperwork to see what I was actually dealing with, it wasn't much just a mild head injury nothing worth keeping her in over.

"He's a snivelling, Pompous Git" her voice said from the bed,

I admit I chuckled a little, "Well we agree on something."

"What was your name again?"

"Dawkins. Dr Jack Dawkins." I told her setting her paperwork back and actually looking at her, but- I had a heart attack.

She sat with her long tight curls against the headboard of the bed, a bandage for her wound around her head, her skin slightly red where she clearly had not yet gotten use to the sun here, a long violet dress been repaired and fixed a hundred times.

I- I felt like I was in a dream, I could barely beleive my own eyes, I- I was utterly convinced I'd never see her again.

Y/n. She was a London street girl a year or two older then me, abandoned by her family and forced to make her own way, Much as I was. She didn't run with Fagin, the boys and I. She more made her own way but still we crossed paths. We were pickpockets and petty theives breaching only death it if became nessesary. She... Was The Violet Widow. Known though out London. She'd walk the streets as a evening girl but a man who paid her never got to finish, He would be taken home, stripped, tied, and riden until she had reached her desires then she would kill him, steal his clothes, money, watch and sell what she wouldn't keep or give to us boys. She kept herself nicely I must say, and she even married a few older wealther men taking their name for a few weeks before butching them too taking all that remained and being left as a widow. She lived just down the road from us, and any clothes she thought would she'd pass along, even if she couldn't always feed herself she always tried to feed us too.

We of course were freindly and we'd both gotten each other out of jams more times then I dare to think.

And Admittedtly I had spent more nights then I care to remember as a bored excited teenage boy, knoitted with the sheets of her bed, and with her. But she never minded, and she never charged me, and never let any of the other boys near her.

Last I had heard she had been arrested on her most recent husbands murder charge, but that was only a week or two before I was locked up myself.

I had greived for her, beloived her hung for her crimes or... atleast locked away somewhere I would never see her.

Never in my life would I have pictured her, Here in port victoria let alone, here infront of me.

I was... thrilled to see her alive! But also... suspcious.

"Hi, Dodger."

Immediately I shut the door, locked it tight, pulled the windows shut and the blinds drawn leaving us in complete darkness and secrecy. Standing catching my breath at the foot of her bed my hands on my waist,

"Y/n!?"

"Hi,"

"The bloody hell are you doing here?"

"Got into a fight with a card cheat," She sighed adjusting her bandage,

"No- I don't mean the hospital, I mean Australia!"

"On my travels..."

"Travels?" I glared, "I'm getting pretty fucking concerned right now, first Fagin shows up like the bloody ghost of Christmas past, and now you! What Oliver bloody twist gonna show up next week!"

"He what?" She glared,

"What?"

"Fagin! Is here!"

"Yeah. showed up a few weeks back."

"What the hell is he doing here?"

"Got himself arrested, sent down here."

"You believe that do you?"

"What choice have I got?" I sighed, "So what are you doing down here?"

"Traveling, making my way around," She shrugged,

"And you want me to believe that do you?"

"Why would I Iie? I didn't know you were here, or Fagin, and yes I'd be pretty damn surprised Oliver Twist showed up too. It's a weird ass coincidence." She explained,

"Alright," I sighed I did want to see her, I was happy even if I was concerned by this coincidence I couldn't be angry at her, "How's your head?" I asked sitting on her bed a moment to check her over

"Never had any complaints," She giggled

"I'm serious."

"I thought you'd remember."

"Y/n."

"I feel fine Jack" she smiled, "Are you alright?"

I softened a little all these little jokes reminding me that it is still y/n. "As I can be,"

"Made quite the life for yourself down here. I take it... Dodger's gone?"

"Very much so. They hang escaped convicts here so... Dodger is dead. For all intensive purposes." I told her as I got up to finish her paperwork

"Understandable," she nodded "Dr Dawkins," She playfully smiled,

"You still just Y/n?" I smiled,

"Ohh god no uhhhhh... Y/n, Smith, Liswick, Warden, Petrecove, uhhh I'm sure there's a Llyod in there somewhere, I loose track" She said, "But just Y/n."

I smirked a little, "Humm... Still the Violet Widow I take it?"

"I see why you became a doctor, quiet the skills of deduction." she smiled,

"Yeah well I hope you're not here planning to add Dawkins to that lineup,"

"Why? Would it be so bad for... old friends to rekindle old flames now that they're all grown up," She smirked,

"Don't even think about it." I warn her, "The issue there is I know what you do. and I know what you'll do to me on our wedding night."

"True." She smiled "You're letting me go then?"

"Yep, just keep it clean, and stay out of trouble" I told her,

"I uhhh Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"I only ask because it is you Jack, but do you think you could slip a girl a few coins before you send me away? just for an apple and a place to rest my head tonight,"

"You don't have anywhere to go? Or any money?"

"No."

"How'd you get here then?"

"Spent my last few coins on the boat trip here, figured I'd get a job or earn money my usual way, I haven't even all that lucky yet,"

I felt awful, nowing the girl who use to gived me soup and clothes kept me happy and better off then I ever could have been without her, now had to ask me for money just to rest her head, but... I don't get paid, meerly food and accomodation, What little I had was for me and I'd worked my ass numb at the card table to get it, But... I can't say not to her "I... I think I can."

"I'd pay you back," she said,

"Yeah, how?"

she stopped short a moment expecting me to say no and she clearly did not actually having an answer, "How I always used to?"

"Yeah?" I smirked a little

"mhm" she nodded moving her dress and opening her legs

"...Deal" I smirked crawling into bed with her "I've missed you" I smirked pulling her into a kiss feeling the intensity of our time apart

"I missed you too Jack," She smirked

#thomasbrodiesangster #tbs imagine #tbs imagines #tbs smut #thomas brodie sangster smut #thomas sangster imagine #thomas brodie sangster imagine #thomas brodie sangster #tbs #thomas sangster #thearttfuldodger #the artful dodger #theartfuldogger #jackdawkins #jack #jack dawkins

75 notes · View notes

caninemotiff · 4 months

Text

CANINEMOTIFF: A WRITEBLR INTRODUCTION

All wander toward death eventually, but only fools and wayfinders run toward it. (Nine Hells Wip)

This will be a place for me to post snippets and edits about my wips and characters, maybe even links to chapters if I'm feeling bold. I'm a serial procrastinator and daydreamer, so I'm hoping this writeblr will hold me accountable for the wips I've discussed here rather than chasing the rabbit down new wip ideas and abandoning my old ones. My wips are all reworkings of wips I've previously introduced for that reason, as I'm determined to finish something this year.

Anyway I'm glad to be back and I'm excited to see what everyone else has on the table as well!

ABOUT ME

You can call my H.P. King, I'm 24, middle child and I grew up in the mountains but now I live by the sea. I have a preoccupation with dog poetry and art.

ABOUT MY WIPS

intros coming soon!

NINE HELLS WIP

NA Portal Fantasy / Queer / Dark Academia

Taglist: @stormharbors / @ladywithalamp / @wildswrites / @darkgazer / @muddshadow / @ghostschemes / @lockejhaven / @moariin / @myriadwriter

ONE FOR SORROW WIP

YA Modern(ish) Fantasy / Queer / Small Town Gothic

Taglist: @cozyprompts / @writeouswriter / @stuffaboutwriting / @cream-and-tea / @moariin / @myriadwriter / @stormharbors / @ladywithalamp / @philocalizt / @wildswrites / @darkgazer / @muddshadow / @ghostschemes / @lockejhaven / @froggywriter / @nightjarz / @funerals-weddings-and-balls / @5targrrl / @reneesbooks / @serenanymph

SOLDIER, POET, KING WIP

NA Fantasy / Queer / Fairytale Vibes

Taglist: @moariin / @myriadwriter / @borisyvain

BLOOM WIP

NA Dystopian Fantasy / Queer / Hopeful Apocalypse

Taglist: @cream-and-tea / @treesandwords / @cozyprompts / @uppoffringar / @the-orangeauthor / @achilleid / @corpsepng / @moariin / @myriadwriter

THE WANDERING LIBRARY WIP

YA Low Fantasy / Queer / Ghibli Inspired

Taglist: @moariin / @myriadwriter

#writeblr #intro #introduction #writeblr intro #writeblr introduction #one for sorrow wip #nine hells wip #bloom wip #bark bark #ive added the taglists from when these wips were up befofe #but theyre all starting from scratch and are being massively rewrittwn #so just tell me if youre no longer interested :)#the wandering library wip #soldier poet king wip

58 notes · View notes

faislittlewhiteraven · 4 months

Text

Undertale Yellow: An amazing fangame with one glaring thing I hate about it (that I need to rant about or else I'm going to go insane).

As the title says, Undertale Yellow was a game I really enjoyed playing. Lots of fun dialogue and designs, utterly fantastic art and animation (holy hell that Flowey fight! <3 <3 <3), great music and feels, etc. Seriously it deserves a ton of praise, not only as a fully completed fangame that took years of development, but as genuinely amazing prequel to one of my favorite games of all time.

...Unfortunately. Much as I truly enjoyed playing through the majority of the game, when I finished the True Pacifist route I was intensely unhappy with how that went and while the credits scenes and funeral for Cover helped ease some of the worst of it, I cannot help but wonder who the flipping f$%& in the development team thought presenting Clover's suicide as the 'just and happy' ending that all the friend characters accept with barely any argument was a good idea?!

Now to clarify: I went into Undertale Yellow knowing that Clover was going to die and that there were good odds their death was going to be self sacrificial or involve suicide. Undertale Yellow is a prequel to Undertale after all and children being murdered and/or sacrificing themselves for the greater good of lovable monster kind is an established part of the setting.

I came in knowing this game was bound to end tragically. I was excited to see how this game would pull that inevitable tragedy off while exploring the Yellow soul's theme of Justice and staying true to Undertale's established canon.

And all the way right up to the end of the True Pacifist ending I truly thought they'd nailed it: The constant pressure of the monsters suffering and being trapped in the Underground despite their sweet and earnest natures, Dalv's clear issues regarding a human, Starlow's unintentional reinforcement of the 'one sacrifice for the greater good' idea with his trolley problem reenactment, the repeated back to back betrayals from characters who should be friends (the Feisty Five, Starlow, Ceraba) hurting Clover instead, the dull realization in universe for Clover that all their efforts to find the missing human children were all for nothing...

It was fantastic. There was a real sense of looming dread for me, seeing all those moments and just knowing in my gut that after the desperate struggle with the agonized and grieving Ceraba, ranting about how monster kind is doomed as it stands, that Clover would start thinking of sacrificing their life for monster kind, especially when their 'sense of Justice' at the start of the game had them willingly jump into a gaping pit they couldn't have possibly have known the height of, for the sake of mission they (according to Flowey) easily abandon when offered a loving home instead. (aka implying not so great things about how much they value their own life)

So. With all that 'hyped for tragedy' in mind, there I am at the True Pacifist ending. I've just spared Ceraba, the friends are all arguing as to how to keep Clover (and possibly any future humans who fall) safe and Clover begins to go into something of a zone out, thinking about all the things they've heard and seen over the course of their adventure.

This is it! I think to myself as I watch it play out. This is where Clover, after everything they've been through, makes the tragic yet understandable mistake of running away from their friends and confronting Asgore just as Flowey kept encouraging them to! Not to fight and bring Asgore to justice but to try talking him down and when they fail that, offering up their life to help and 'save' their friends even as the narrative will (matching Undertale) will make it clear that this is a mistake and only hurts everyone involved, just like every suicide and child murder in Undertale hurts everyone involved until Frisk is able to end the cycle of pain by rejecting the Kill or be Killed premise and setting the monsters free! Wow, I can't believe it, they set it up so well, what a perfect way to tie into Undertale's greater narrative via tragic prequel, I love this eeeeee!

Except of course that's not what happens.

My first hint something is off is when the quotes Clover's 'remembering' in their little bubble start being way too positive for the set up (also there's nothing from the trolley problem section). The second is when the music shifts from quiet to holy and then outright happy.

And third is when Clover snaps out of it and point blank tells their friends they choose to die. Now, I'm getting a little confused and wary at this but alright, this is a pretty long sequence already but I guess we get to have one final hope moment before Clover somehow gets away from their friends to die (maybe Flowey if not Asgore?)-

-and then I am left absolutely flabbergasted as the friends who just spent the last huge chunk of the game trying to protect Clover/getting talked out of killing them because 'its not right' end up agreeing with Clover's decision after a pitiful amount of arguing against it (where the utterly stupid 'there's no other option' reasoning is used as the primary reasoning despite all the other options being very clearly stated just moments ago), before the woman who's entire massive trauma arc that is centered around her accidentally killing her own child out of blind faith for 'the greater good', proceeds to assist Clover with their suicide (who she clearly views as a surrogate child despite her best attempts not to) while the other characters meekly say goodbye, give hugs and leave all while bittersweet but mostly sweet 'great job honey, this sucks but we're proud of you' music plays (also Flowey says stuff but like, its Flowey so frankly he could say anything and it'd be fine. He's not the issue here).

...Wow.

What a screwed up way for that to end. Like, I clearly get the 'idea' that Clover is meant to be noble and good and such but like, really? A fan game of Undertale (where one of the main ending messages was 'Don't kill and don't be killed', where a child's suicidal attempts to free monster kind lead to every major tragedy in the game, and where suicide was repeatedly shown to only make things worse through Asgore and Alphys in numerous neutral endings) is the game that decides having its protagonist's pointless self sacrifice should be honored and treated as a good ending by the narrative?????

How did none of the otherwise clearly brilliant people working on this miss the very bad, no good implications of Clover's friends being talked into letting them kill themselves and having the narrative frame it as anything but the worst end?????

I have many, many questions. And concerns. And...

Look, I do get it. Undertale Yellow is still a fangame. There are going to be weird notes in the tone due to different writers and such, and I should just be happy that the game was finished it at all, and accept that this god awful scene is probably just the result of its creators really, really wanting their beloved characters to go out as kindly (and beautifully drawn/animated) as possible with all the hugs and feels of canon Undertale without taking into account how much the very different context might warp the tone and the characterizations of everyone in the entire scene.

But like. God damn. There is something very off putting about not letting brave kind Martlet refuse to take this as an answer and then finding she actually can't stop it happening (and no her saying that after like two sentences from 'Ceraba who's judgement about the human sucks' doesn't count). About Starlow not recognising he and his posse might've had something to do with why Clover is thinking this. About Ceraba not on some level going 'IF THIS IS YOUR CHOICE THEN WHY DIDN'T YOU LET ME USE YOU TO SAVE KANAKO?!' Edit: Also a totally waste of prequel opportunity not to let Asgore visibly make the worst choices we canonly know he made on screen. Yes, he gets to stab Clover in the Flawed!Pacist route but Clover's trying to shoot him in that one; the fact we don't get to see him stab a 'far too willing to die for their friends and not defending themselves' Clover as the friend trio can do nothing to stop it from happening feels like such a cop out I swear XD

I'm all for 'Clover dies willingly' at the end of the True Pacifist but they way they did it was just... Really ugh in a way I'm finding tricky to word and I'm honestly shocked I haven't seen more people point it out (though admittedly that might be because I haven't really looked around much). ...So yeah. I know its too late to change said ending but really kinda hoping at some point one of the Undertale Yellow team realizes this might be an issue and thinks to add a content warning in the game's opening or something because it could really use one of those. Also that for any future projects they do, they happen to do a little more research into how to avoid accidentally glorify suicide as opposed to having it as a tragedy because damn they did not manage that here whatsoever.

---

ANYWAY, with all that rant finally out of my head some other stuff about Undertale Yellow I be feeling strongly:

Flowey's boss battle and the lead up to it is incredible and without a doubt makes the neutral route the most amazing well crafted route in the game. 10/10 may have already mentioned this in the massive rant above but if so gonna repeat it anyway because it's just that damn good.

Genocide route being a deconstruction of the 'disproportionate revenge is justice' 90s Anti Hero is very cool theme wise but the lack of the lack of stuff like notes in shops saying 'please don't kill my family' and monsters with less screen time getting more fleshed out drags it down a little, as does Clover not actually choking on dust or getting attacked by the human souls or something at the very end. Really do love the Martlet battle flashback moments and Axel's horrifically timed confession scene though.

The general uselessness of the ACT menu in big 'endurance' fights as well as the lack of 'alternative sparing ACTS' makes fights a lot less fun than they could be and I found myself a lot less willing to use them in general as a result despite them being my favorite thing about Undertale. Did still adore what fun stuff was in them though so I think it's just a case of them being a tad too out of focus compared to the bullet hell gameplay (which I'm not that good at) for my tastes.

Pacifist route could've really used some more optional hangouts and/or letters from the main friends. As is, the peak 'hang out' part of the game for me was the nap room I spent maybe two minutes in, and Dalv especially could've benefitted a ton from a bit more presence (I got more interaction from Mo and the rabbit who's tongue was stuck to a pole and I'm not happy about that? If nothing else not getting to see the inside of Martlet's house or help Dalv build his new home feel like lost opportunities).

Personal pet peeve and nothing too serious but not a fan of Asgore not getting the kill on Clover outside of Flawed Pacifist. Makes sense on most routes (glares at T!Pacifist again) given the way the plot is set up and all but given Toby Fox has repeatedly stated Asgore killed all the humans who fell post Chara it just drives me nuts XD (As does the poor Blue Soul getting treated as a killer/evil but like, I can see where people are coming on that one and Undertale Yellow uses that to amp up Chujin's nightmare fuel vibes fantastically so I shall reluctantly congratulate that theory's use there and steel myself for the inevitable 'wait you're using Undertale Yellow lore but Axis didn't kill Integrity?' questions that will be posted on my 'will eventually be posted' Undertale fanfics XDDDD)

Love all the main cast, especially Martlet, and I am way too hyped for the day Undertale Yellow and its main cast get their own fandom tags on AO3.

...Kanako's death was incredibly stupid and avoidable but like, that's kind of what I like about it? I really also wanna know which Amalgamite she became (I'm thinking probably the one that tucks Frisk in to sleep and pats them on the head because of her and Ceraba's little 'going to sleep' game but like, I could see a very heart wrenching case for her being part of So Cold as well).

Anyone reading this who somehow hasn't played Undertale Yellow should really stop reading this and go play the game. It's free, its (one major thematic issue I have moral objections to aside) pretty decently written, and hey, more Undertale stuff to have fun making fanworks with <3

Goddamn has Undertale Yellow kicked my drive to write Undertale fanfic into overload XD Thank you Undertale Yellow team for helping me get all fired up again and sorry about all the grr but dang it, it needed to be said and now that it's out of my system I can throw myself into finding ways to incorporate your settings and characters into fanworks of my own (admittedly the AU elements might make things kinda tricky -Asgore having to kill EVERY human child even more so- but that nifty little detail of early Royal Guard Martlet having and being willing to abuse her access to the Hotland Lab allows me so many ways to have Chujin be a well meaning awful person and I am living for it!) <3 <3 <3

#Undertale Yellow #undertale #fangame #undertale spoilers #undertale yellow spoilers #tw discussion of suicide and suicide related themes #game rants #constructive criticism (well hopefully anyway)#Fais rambles #I have been hesitating over the post now button for twenty minutes now and I really should not be this nervous. I'm not even rude dang it #oh wait I forgot swearing is rude in some places #cw swearing #ut yellow #uty #uty spoilers

60 notes · View notes

stardustincarnate · 9 months

Text

I'm Scared, Hold Me // Yoosung Kim x Reader

FEMALE READER.

SUMMARY: Watching a horror movie sounded like the perfect excuse for cuddling.

WORD COUNT: 1628 words.

GENRE: Fluff.

WARNING: Cringe nicknames. Because people in love do and say cringe stuffs. Also, possible grammatical and typographical errors ahead.

♡ writing commissions | art commissions ♡

A/N: It has been a year or two since I wrote this... ig its about time I post it. I had some obsession with Yoosung back then, hehe.

Yoosung couldn't think straight. He was nervous. He was of course very excited too, even though it wasn't the first time seeing you—but it was his first time watching a movie with you. Unsurprisingly, people like him would feel nervous due to overthinking what's going to happen between you two during the movie. Especially if it were romance... But apparently that wasn't the case. Though he badly wished it was.

You two were going to watch a horror movie. It's not like he had a choice, anyway. When you told him you preferred watching scary movies he felt something drop to his gut. Horror movies?! But.. but how could he get a chance to slip his hands through yours and lock eyes with you during the most romantic part of the movie so that you two could actually do what the protagonists were doing and—oh boy. He didn't want to disappoint you so he just acquiesced.

He was quick to open the door after you had knocked. Flustered with you jumping into his arms, he sort of malfunctioned before he returned the hug. Not too tightly as he didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable.

"I brought extra snacks for us!"

"O-Oh! But Seven already spared us a few Honey Buddha Chips and I've got some more popcorn and my mom also cooked for us.."

"Yoosung, you're forgetting one thing!"

"Oh—right!! Pizza..! How could I?!"

"Not to worry! Your knight in shining armor slash princess has brought two boxes of pizza for her baby!"

"Baby?"

"Are you not letting me come in?"

"Of course not [Y/N]! I mean—come on in!" Yoosung chuckled, nervousness evident on his tone.

Eventually the movie commenced. Initially you two were sitting with a decent space between you in the sofa but somehow before the opening credits had ended, Yoosung had found his way right beside you. And when you rested your head on his shoulder and placed your palm on his chest, he swore he had never been as red as during that day.

It was so romantic, thought he, if you were to minus the horrors currently unfolding on the monitor.

With a heap of other snacks in front of you which Yoosung had apparently forgotten existed as he was busy trying not to freak out during the first few minutes and break his manly side in front of you, you stared intently at the screen while finishing half the box of pizza.

"Oh no! Don't believe him he's just pranking you! And unknowingly putting you in danger!! Don't go in ther—oh no don't be so stupid!"

Yoosung peeled his eyes from the monitor and looked at you, a tad shocked to see you looking at him with a certain smile on your face. He was torn between thinking of it as cute or suspicious...

You giggled. "You know, the main character reminds me a lot of you."

"Eh?! But I'm not that gullible. Am I?"

"Oh, sure, chocolate milk." Yoosung shunned your gaze with his face beet red. "My cutie Yoosung." You continued, poking his cheek. He rubbed his nape and pouted, reluctantly admitting, "I guess I do find myself stumbling on pranks most of the time.. but at least now I know better not to go into an abandoned wing in case Seven tells me another one of his nonsense!"

The moment the protagonist entered the abandoned wing of the building, the door shut behind him with a loud thud. At the same time you two heard the creaking of the door.

And it wasn't part of the movie.

"Who's there?!" Yoosung squeaked and wrapped his arms around you—maybe a little too tightly—and kept on turning his head, albeit too afraid to actually look at the door.

"Yoosung, it's me!"

"Oh, mom..."

"Sorry.. I didn't interrupt anything, did I? I was just wondering if you wanted some drinks."

"Oh.. sure!"

His mother left two more bottles of soda in front of you before leaving. Once you two were alone, Yoosung realized that he didn't stop hugging you. Poor boy panicked and blushed furiously.

"I-I'm sorry [Y/N]! Did I squeeze you too hard? I'm sorry! And it's not like I was scared. Definitely not!! I just wanted to protect you in case there really was a gho—wah!! [Y/N]..!!"

There was a jumpscare. Well—it looked like one to him. Yoosung clung onto you and hid his face on your neck, his hair tickling you which made you giggle and blush furiously. You ruffled his hair and sighed fondly, "Calm down Yoosung. That's just his friend, not the ghost."

"What..?" Very slowly and reluctantly, he looked at the monitor and let out a huge sigh of relief. And just seconds later he was a fumbling mess of blushes and apologies again. "[Y/N] I'm so so sorry! Ahh.. nooo.. That wasn't very manly of me, was it? I promise to do better! It won't happen again!"

Oh, this adorable boy you so deeply loved. Sure. You grinned. But you both knew well that it was a lie, for everytime there was a scene that his brain had identified a 'jumpscare' his body would automatically attach itself into yours and he'd cover his face with his hands. Other than the crunchy munching of those Honey Buddha Chips and the sound from the movie, his squeaks filled the room.

You were having a hard time controlling your laughter. You didn't want to tease him.. Oh, poor boy! You almost took pity on your boyfriend. But to see him like that—in a state you perceived as absolutely adorable, with his hands resting on your shoulder and unintentionally squeezing them while he tried to cower behind you—really, would anyone want that moment to end? Reckon he would just have to forgive you for 'torturing' him by making him watch something that scared him to the bones. And, of course, he would forgive you for this.

Anything for you.

Although you were the one who suggested to watch a horror movie in the first place, you couldn't say that some parts didn't scare you. As it got closer to the climax, you started fidgeting your fingers, which Yoosung soon took notice. Yoosung looked at you, and a tad hesitant, he wrapped his arms around you. The tension ebbed from your body as you allowed yourself to succumb in his warm embrace. It was tentative, his hold, at first. But as moments passed and more horrors frightened the both of you, his touch eventually gave in and turned into something tight, sure, and something that felt like home, right where you belonged.

He wasn't even watching anymore. It had become a turmoil there and your occasional squeaks told him that the scene unfolding wasn't something he'd relish to see. And without heed you placed your hand above his, rubbing gently on that soft skin which caught his attention. He returned the favor and grabbed the opportunity to bring your hand underneath his—that way he could share more of his warmth with you, and that way which also allowed him to weave his fingers through yours, causing an eruption of red on both your cheeks.

"Are you okay [Y/N]?" He whispered. You looked at him—his eyes, his lips—then back to his eyes.

"I'm scared, hold me."

Yoosung was more than happy to oblige. He'd become rather bold by then. You closed your eyes as butterflies manifested themselves inside your stomach from the way he brought you sitting on his lap, his arms around your waist and his chin on your shoulder. His fingers found their way to gently comb your hair and bring them forth over your right shoulder, exposing your nape. He thought of doing it—hesitating over and over again until he gathered enough courage which spilled all over his chest, and then he was peppering your nape with the gentlest of pecks, his lips carefully grazing over your then shivering skin, the touch nothing but a lick of the wind, a flicker. The butterflies multiplied, and the heat burned your cheeks, your nape, and your ears.

The pleasant sensation contrasted starkly with the gore afoot on the screen, the turmoils unfolding in the movie. But they were paid with no heed, and in fact had been reduced into but little to no sounds by the remote which Yoosung had taken a hold of with one hand, while the other remained wrapped around your stomach, the warmth of his palm permeating your skin as he made circles with it in a careful, loving manner.

Horror movie long forgotten, you two settled on ensconcing yourselves on one another, laying on the couch, limbs interweaving, fingers interlaced.

Four words, and they were all it took for what he had been surreptitiously dreaming of and what he thought was only possible if you two had settled prior with a romance movie, to happen.

Four words, and a horror movie, and suddenly the idea of the latter wasn't so terrible anymore. Yoosung could live with that, as long as more opportunities of moments like this could present themselves before him.

Moments of you laying on his chest, delightfully humming and tracing patterns on his skin—patterns you could only see. The silence was cozy, brimming with affection. The pizza was only remembered when it was already tepid, and it took longer than it would've had been consumed if you two weren't so entangled with each other, laughing, giggling, and smiling at the sheer fact that you were placed in an intimate, comfortable position.

Yoosung smiled to himself, wishing that perhaps, even at times you aren't scared, even at the most arbitrary moments, he would get the chance to hold you like this.

Close to his heart.

Closer to his soul.

#kim yoosung #yoosung kim #mystic messenger yoosung #mysme yoosung #yoosung x mc #mystic messenger x reader #mysme x reader #yoosung x reader #kim yoosung x reader #mystic messenger #mystic messenger headcanons #fanfic x reader #x reader #anime x reader #fluff #otome game

92 notes · View notes

neontokyoo · 8 months

Text

The Struggles of Single-Parenting

Really quickly just to get things straight because people are wondering, requests ARE closed and may not be open again for a while. However, I'm leaving my inbox open, so feel free to share thirsts, talk with me, or just send me whatever's on your mind right now, whether it be q&a's or just silly ideas. And I'll still continue writing on my own. <3

So, as I said a while ago I've been really busy and my brother was shot, leaving me to fly down to Arizona to pick up my niece and fly back to California. And then when my boyfriend came to Arizona to fly us back (because his mom has flight benefits and helped us save money) he surprised me with a new puppy.

Fortunately, I had a little bit of time to write today while my niece was taking a nap, so here you guys go because I've been kind of dead trying to take care of a two-year-old, and a brand-new puppy while my roommate and boyfriend go to work every day. I think I'll be turning the children's fanfictions into a new series, too (for every character in both MTP and BSD) so be ready for some more chaotic fluff.

And for anyone who follows me on Wattpad and/or AO3, I may be linking the Bella series to Dazai Issues after the book is finished (if I ever finish it).

Unfortunately, this series may or may not come out in order, but I'll sort them out on my master lists the best I can.

Plus the name reveal of my new puppy!

Pairing: Dazai Osamu x Fem!Reader Genre: fluff Summary: You have to try to take care of Bella while Dazai is at work. To make matters worse? You also have to take care of a new puppy, all while being pregnant with your second child. Warnings: None

Eighteen weeks pregnant with your second child, you found yourself in the midst of delightful chaos. Your husband had left for work at the Armed Detective Agency, leaving you to handle your energetic two-year-old daughter, Bella, and a brand-new puppy named Ryuna.

As the morning sun painted your cozy home with warmth, you sighed, watching Bella chase Ryuna around the living room. The energetic giggles of your daughter filled the air, blending with Ryuna's excited yips. Balancing your growing baby bump, you decided it was time for strategic intervention.

"Bella, sweetie," you called with a gentle smile. "How about we read one of your favorite stories?"

Bella's eyes sparkled, and she immediately abandoned her pursuit of Ryuna to hop onto the couch next to you. She handed you a colorful book from the shelf, and you began to read aloud, your voice soothing and comforting. Ryuna settled down, curling up at your feet.

You weren't quite sure why—or how—you convinced Dazai to adopt a dog—considering how much Dazai hates dogs—while you already have enough on your hands with Bella, alone, but seeing how happy the dog made your daughter was enough for you.

Just as you reached the climax of the story, your phone buzzed. It was a message from Dazai: "How are my two favorite girls doing?"

You chuckled, typing a reply while Bella listened with rapt attention to the story. "We're having a lively morning! Bella and Ryuna are quite the duo."

Dazai's response came quickly, filled with his usual charm: "Make sure Ryuna doesn't outshine me!"

After finishing the story, you set Bella up with crayons and paper, encouraging her to draw while you tended to Ryuna's needs. Puppies, like babies, needed constant attention and care. You made sure Ryuna had water and a fresh place to sleep, which turned out to be your second attempt after she'd decided Bella's art supplies were a cozy spot.

During this momentary lull, you took a deep breath and decided to seize the opportunity. You retrieved your phone and started researching ways to prepare Bella for the arrival of her new sibling. As you read through the advice, you couldn't help but feel a mixture of excitement and trepidation about the changes ahead.

Bella's joyful laughter interrupted your thoughts, and you looked up to see her proudly showing you a scribbled masterpiece of stick figures and colorful swirls. With a proud smile, you applauded her effort.

"Mama, look! Art!" she exclaimed, beaming up at you.

"That's amazing, Bella! You're such a talented artist," you praised, feeling a sense of pride welling up within you.

The day passed in a blur of activities – from outdoor playtime in the garden to changing diapers and preparing meals. Your energy seemed to flow from an endless reservoir, fueled by the love you had for your daughter, the anticipation of your new baby, and the deep bond you shared with Dazai.

As the sun began to set, Dazai returned home, wearing his usual rakish grin. Bella's face lit up when she saw her father, and she ran to greet him. Ryuna, too, wagged her tail excitedly, completing the picture of a joyful homecoming.

"Hey there, my lovely ladies," Dazai cooed, scooping Bella into his arms. "Did you have a fun day?"

You joined them, resting a hand on your growing belly. "It was certainly eventful, but we managed just fine."

Dazai leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead. "I knew you could handle it."

As the evening settled in, you all gathered in the living room. Bella snuggled up next to you, Ryuna curled at your feet, and Dazai nestled in beside you. In that moment, surrounded by your growing family, you felt an overwhelming sense of contentment and love. The challenges of the day had only strengthened the bonds between you all.

With Bella in your lap, Dazai wrapped his arms around both of you, his love evident in his gaze. "Our little trio is the best team, don't you think?"

You nodded, a soft smile gracing your lips. "Absolutely. And soon, we'll be a quartet."

Dazai's eyes sparkled with anticipation as he placed a hand on your belly. "I can't wait to meet our newest addition."

As the evening wore on, you cherished these moments – the simple joys of togetherness, love, and the promise of a growing family. With each passing day, you were reminded that no challenge was insurmountable as long as you faced it with the unwavering support of your loved ones by your side.

#bsd fanfic #bsd #bsd x reader #bsd spoilers #bsd dazai #bungou stray dogs #dazai osamu #osamu dazai #dazai bsd #dazai x reader #bungou stray dogs dazai #dazai x y/n #dazai x fem reader #dazai x you #bungo stray dogs #bungo stray dogs x reader #bungou sd #bsd anime

75 notes · View notes