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bengiyo · 7 months

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I am curious for your perspective on the way the OF creators are interacting with fans and have even admitted to editing the show based on fan reactions. It strikes me as an unusual level of interaction and capitulation, though of course TV is a live medium that is nearly always responsive to reactions to some extent. My preference is for a lot less of this kind of thing, but I know you have experience with direct interaction with media creators and have found it enhances your experience sometimes. What do you make of how these dynamics are showing up in OF and the effect it’s having on the show?

TV and Critic Background

So, I am actually the worst person to talk to if you think the creators should be quiet about their work, because I really enjoy talking to directors, producers, actors, cinematographers, and especially editors about their work. I often go to film festivals just to talk to the creators about their processes.

I've also been in the TV space a really long time, and I am used to this kind of behavior. I don't think a lot of folks who are in BL are used to being in the process of TV itself, and I think a lot of people have let the Netflix binge model inform the way they view TV. TV is not like movies. When you get a movie, you are seeing the end product of filming, editing, test screenings, re-edits, etc. TV is usually only an episode or two ahead of the viewers.

It's extremely normal for a show to respond to feedback when characters test well. The 100 did this with Jasper. He was supposed to die in the pilot when that spear entered his chest, but he tested well with audiences so they revived him.

Fun Fact: This is why Kiseki: Dear to Me didn't just move their release schedule up when episode 8 was leaked early. They probably weren't finished assembling episode 9.

I followed Sense8 through its entire development process all the way from rumors and then J. Michael Stracynski's posts about it, to the things Lana and Lily said about it, to the commentary from the cast.

I have a special hatred for Rick Behrman over Star Trek.

I absolutely hate Russel T. Davies because of Cucumber.

I bailed on Supernatural because of the way the writers condescended to us at comicon after killing Kevin.

I know some fans are upset about the idea that scenes they wanted to see got cut, but I was there for Noah Galvin opening his fucking mouth to talk shit about other actors at ABC who were playing beloved gay characters and that subsequently getting The Real O'Neals canceled. The show had a very short second season and I feel forever salty about that.

What does this mean for Jojo and Ninew and Den?

I actually think Jojo, Den, and Ninew are fine. I don't think they usually poopoo on valid reads from what I've seen, and mostly they're having fun with the fans, too. I just don't think people are used to the creators being so honest about how feedback affects the editing process.

I think this is the first time we've had a big show in a while where the creator was fairly active on socials about the show. Aof and Au are usually pretty quiet when their shows are airing, and only give small tidbits while they show is airing. Jojo is silly and likes to play with fans. Den is feisty and has a gay agenda to pursue.

Truly, I don't think Jojo and friends are that bad about anything with this show, because they're mostly just laughing and stating things that are obvious to people who pay attention to how the sausage is made.

Shipping

That being said, the biggest struggle OF is having is shipping. The FK girlies are so loud and their heavy breathing has likely influenced the way Jojo and friends decided to write Ray. The FB girlies are so into them that it's made Jojo and them dial back some of their Top content because the audience hates him so much. Only Boston and Nick feel like they've made it through the shipping gamut intact because Neo and Mark aren't bringing a bunch of preexisting shippers to the table.

Coming off of episode 10, you can see this plainly with the nasty4nasty dynamic with Boston and Nick. The emotional core of their dynamic feels true, even down to the way their moments in the store mirror their first interactions again. Boston came in for service about his phone and intentionally showed Nick something on it.

I don't think Jojo has ever had to work with multiple acting pairs that were big branded pairs prior to this, and this is only his second time really dealing with that. With Never Let Me Go, Pond and Phuwin weren't that big yet, and he wasn't threatening their ship with anything complicated. OF is challenging for people who just watch BL as fap material and have to deal with their faves not being easy people to parse.

As usual, we go back to that post that goes around all the time, thought I think the OP deleted it:

"Never ever be normal about fictional characters but please GOD be normal about the people who play them, I am begging you" -tumblr user mantorokk-writes

#answered #only friends the series #only friends meta #jojo tichakorn #ninew pinya #den panuwat #best kittisak

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cutemeat · 2 years

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ok i Gotta say smth cuz ive been thinking about it... I think that the podcast has brought in this assumption that RCG actually “doesnt think that deeply” about the shows writing but i think that’s total bullshit and here’s why.

The RCG Podcast is most likely pandering/market testing with the wealthier half of RCG’s audience-- aka the more casual (but loyal) viewership of Men aged 18-34... again there is apparently a very wealthy overall demographic, which is totally something i’d tuck away if I were the producer of something.

so my hunch is again RCG is using this podcast to make money and build a good reputation (like they gained from donating all the profits of their Whiskey brand)/good PR and maintain loyalty to the brand amongst even their casual audience (who lately have been slipping due to feeling alienated by recent seasons with stunts like Mac’s MFHP dance, the structure/writing of s15 being more serious than before, gay gay-ass lovestory, etc) cuz as Mac (Rob) states for us in LW7 “[funding] is a very important part of the filmmaking process.”...

so THAT is why for the podcast, they are not going as deep as they used to on the DVD Bonus feature commentary tracks cuz, again, that is not the audience they are aiming to appease with this podcast! When people here say it feels like there’s a certain audience they’re targeting, you are probably not wrong in your suspicions.. its my opinion that u should trust your gut here lmao.

The reason I think there is still very much a heavy degree of care being put into the writing is 1. Glenn is back in the writer’s room and 2. Season 15 (post episodes 1-3) really showed me that they still have a grasp on Sunny threads/metaphors like the “cat in the wall” metaphor... But RCG are very much aware of their reputation as being a "low-brow” “dirty” “peepee poopoo” college-student aged comedy show, so they’re not gonna push the envelope on something like the RCG Podcast that has been scientifically fucking engineered to satiate the more casual half of the audience who does watch the show like that.

Marketing n brand loyalty are all meticulous fuckin things and I don’t doubt that extends even into this kind of territory. maybe im 100% crazy n just lost in the sauce but this is my take on it.

#iasip #i grew up around business ppl i have the desperate need to be able to tell when im being marketed to LOL #i suspected from the very beginning that they were doing this podcast for some image related/#marketing reason... n i think i was right #just rewatch 'Catches a Leprechaun' n esp dennis' whole arc in that ep allright...

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pekodayz · 11 months

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poopoo aini molly usiuii random lore questions

You are now forced to read about them. my ososan oc hellspawns: aini, molly, and usiuii.....(they grow up so fast..sobs). i used this generator for oc questions. fun lore for shits and giggles!11! uhh haha read under cut...thanks....

How does your oc handle having a crush on someone? Do they have crushes a lot or rarely?

Aini: RARELY. She does not handle them well at all. Will end up shooting you if you try to ask...she misses though. (i-it's not like i like them!!!! b-b[redacted]) Then she goes berserk and denies any sort of crush or warm fuzzy feelings. throwing every single cuss word in the book at u. then she gives up (blushing and stuttering) and sobs, running away and swearing she will find your address and will send the codes to nuke your house. (she doesn't...she sulks away. embarrassed). But she will give try and bribe you to not say anything, might become ur maid for a bit. I think you can tell she has a crush if they are able to subdue her chunibyo-gundere-tsun-delulu personality for a minute. Rendering her stunned and speechless...and normal. Does soften her features (FOR A MOMENT!!!) if she likes someone, don't point it out.

Molly: SOMETIMES. Can handle them...okayish? They don't bring it up, but it's kinda obv is she has a crush on someone. She has a goofy smile on her face, but if you ask them......smile goes away instantly. u know how charas get swirly eyes and steam coming out of their ears. yeah. Then Molly goes mute for a while and just avoids eye contact......then they give u a quirked-up janky grin and begins to leave the scene. They're mumbling under their breath. (100 words a second, sounds like french. (THEY R NOT FRENCH. language will vary.)) She is extra, extra, EXTRA sweet around their crush. Buying them frappes and giving them more hugs....uhh..Molly..you're hugging them too hard. Will give more gifts as well. Don't try and push it...they will break and something magical and evangelical will happen.

Usiuii: RARELY. Can handle them...uh...concealing them. She squints if you bring it up. Then denies it wholeheartedly . denydenydenydenydenydenydenydenydeny. Then they say something completely off-topic. "I'm flaccid." "What?" "What." She would say that she isn't into that "anime" crap. (she's an otaku in secret. what r u on abt, usiuii.) Then would try to change the topic again, she's gripping her knees now. It's drawing blood. Sweating. Eyes twitching. She moves her hand over behind her back, and pulls out her guitar out of thin air. Staring at you. Holds it like a baseball bat, swings it, everything goes black. You wake up and see Usiuii wearing a completely different get up. She looks at you and says, "you wanna go to a maid cafe?" ...she changed the topic again. Why did she change her clothes...

What is your oc like during a conversation? What kind of things do they tend to talk about?

Aini: Uses a lot of emotion, mwahahahas a lot. Even though she is....something...she will listen intently, keen on learning abt things. "You humans are so...peculiar..." "Aini, drop the act already." "SHUT THE HELL UP." She's not THAT mean, she does have a soft spot and will remember details abt you. Don't mention it to her, she'll point the gun at you. She does like talking about people, whether it may be in a positive or negative light. Anddd her unrelenting dream to bring heaven, hell, and earth together. (pipe dream. dont mind her)

Molly: Good listener, soft-spoken...okay well even tho they're a good listener, they can still get a bit distracted. But will immediately apologize and bow a lot, she gets dizzy...oopss. Likes to talk abt whatever show is trending...or just sweets. Bring up any of her interests and they will go on an hour-long spiel. Get comfortable.

Usiuii: Elbows on the table, straight-faced. Listening to you, sending brainwaves to your brain. (I AM LISTENING. KEEP GOING.) Short answers, nods, and eyebrow raises. Likes to talk about otaku things...only to a specific person tho. (gee, [redacted], you really get me...sigh...*looks at them* wanna watch a hentai? ((they both turn it off after 10 minutes))

Does your oc wear/style their clothes in a certain way?

They all have their default clothes and work clothes. Molly likes taking them to the mall to buy new shit. They have many outfits. Thanks Molly.

Does your oc live alone or with others?

Since I want them to be inseparable, (BFFS FOREVER) they live in the same apartment complex. Right. Next. Door. To each other. HEART. They crash at each other's places a lot. Rock, paper, scissors....okay we're going over your house. They usually just do sleepovers 6/7 days of the week. Lots of doordash....and Chibita's every single day ofc.

How many hours of sleep does your oc need in order to function normally?

Aini: NO SLEEP. NONE. she's lying, she needs 7 hours. She gets all tired and groggy and will lean on anyone for a nap. like a baby..nuzzling up and being quiet for once.

Molly: since they work in the office...8 hours. they want to sleep more though, like 10. Constantly drinking frappes keep her up at night tho. It's a problem. (pouring themselves another cup of coffee. she stares at u, smiles nervously)

Usiuii: 4 hours...plays dating sims after midnight. (looks at the shining sunrise thru the window) "ah."

What is something about your oc's appearance others always compliment them on?

Aini: Her hair and teeth.

Molly: Hair and eyes...and their body. (shoots u)

Usiuii: Hair and excessive use of spikes. (teeth sometimes)

Around what time does your oc have lunch? Do they make something themself, or do they get lunch elsewhere?

On work days, Aini and Usiuii just eat around 11AM. They scavenge for whatever snacks that are at their workplace (convenience store) Molly just goes to Mcdonald's around 12:30PM...alone...since...they have to work in corporate...sad...they miss any sort of friends...sobs. She does eat with coworkers sometimes...she sighs solemnly.

Off days, they kinda just go to whatever's close. Or rock paper scissors...winner gets to pick. ok have fun, you freaks.

How far is your oc willing to go in order to keep their friends safe?

They will all kill for their friends btw. Like beasts.

Has your oc ever dyed their hair, and if so, what color? Did they like it?

Aini: Natural, doesn't want to dye her hair. Is scared. Will freak out.

Molly: Dyed it black and brown b4. Blonde with pink. Just straight black. They liked it. But orange is their natural hair color.

Usiuii: Natural hair color is pink. Dyed it some darker shade to seem more natural...and cooler...

What dish can your oc make best?

Aini: can't cook for shit. will order food online. best "dish" was pizza. she bought that.

Molly: Eclairs. Anything pasta or sweet they can make. Can cook anything, actually....uhh....molly...idk where they learned that.

Usiuii: Carbonara. Eat it, and you will ascend to the heavens for 6.6 seconds.

How fast does your oc fall in love?

Aini: slow-burn it. unless something happens like accidental smth smth (accidental ____ or someone she has taken a liking to falls asleep on her) . then it'll pick up a bit. Then she just represses it. Until she looks a mess.

Molly: Kinda quick, but realizes and dials back. Staring longingly at them. She must keep calm.

Usiuii: Unknown. She wakes up one night in a cold sweat, eyes shaking...something happened....what is this feeling...someone kill me...

What is your oc's favorite alcoholic drink?

Aini: Wine. Will take a fruity drink tho.

Molly: Margaritas. Or anything that's sweet.

Usiuii: Sake. (wtf. tryhard) or just beer.

Does your oc believe in love at first sight?

They all say no. Molly was going to say yes...chickened out.

Does your oc have any bad habits, and if so, why? Is it possible for them to stop?

Aini: Repressing. Makes her go insane. 1% chance of stopping

Molly: Caffeine-addict. Tastes too good to resist. Fidgets a lot. NOT STOPPING (latte, coffee, frappe, cap, anything)

Usiuii: Late-night gamer. Doesn't get enough sleep. NOT STOPPING

How good is your oc at giving advice?

Aini only gives good advice when you finally let her guard down. Speaks in a different dialect.

Molly gives good advice...sometimes. When they're nervous, they stutter a bit, but will try.

Usiuii...uh...depends on what the topic is. If it's emotional, she kinda just sideyes u nervously and smiles. (uh.........what.....hah....)

Does your oc prefer to sit around and chill or be up and moving, doing something?

Aini: Depends on the mood. If she's ready to be herself, shes up all day. Sometimes she just wants to keep to herself and watch the clouds. rare silence. Then Molly carries her to their next destination.

Molly: Wants to go everywhere, everyday. They will drag you to the mall, any place to eat, the park, the city. They loves doing something. She can't sit still.

Usiuii: Will laze around and gets dragged, MOVE . GET UPPPOPPP

BWAHHHHHH OKAY IM DONE FOR NOW!! That was fun. Will continue this tomorrow. THANK YA FOR READING THIS SUPER LONG LORE. (snaps knuckles and slumps) oughh.

#ppp #my hands hurt. haahahhahahaah #hope you liked part 1 of their lore #(shaky hands holds out hand)#collapses #this is just me rambling. thanks for reading ....AUHASHAS #(lays on soft pile of grass)#hi gorls #hi aini molly usiuii

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silvershayde · 6 months

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Bonjur peepee poopoo

How're u

How's life

I got 100% in almost all Fontaine regions

Heyy I’m doing alright I guess. Kinda stressing about uni which isn’t good considering stress incapacitates me. But we move.

How you’ve done that is beyond me, I’m no where near 100% all fontaine regions. Maybe like at most 50% for each region. Def my favourite place to explore tho so i am taking me time. Last time I logged on I was obsessed with Erinnyes Forest. Pahsiv got me thinking about my Vishap-people ocs. Doesnt help that i strongly think vishap people will be a thing in natlan. Dragons who’ve evolved into their forms? Thats a Vishap.

Oh and I’m not playing genshin as much anymore. I got furina and now i dont care about the game lmao. So i might end up deleting it and coming back next year. I feel like I’ve lost the magic. I think i need to wait like i did when i first got the game. I joined during 1.something and didnt come back to play until sumeru was about to drop and i played through all of liyue’s quests and inazumas whilst just exploring all on my own and i loved it so much. Surely Snezhnaya will be around by the time i come back and i’ll have a plethora of content to go through. Maybe the magic will come back too?

In the meantime ill be playing more of this game called sky (i think, the name is evading me) and sea of stars. Specifically sea of stars. Its actually the first game ive played thats turn based and pixel art. Like the way stardew valley looks

#silveranswers #mutuals #been a long while huh?

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astrobei · 1 year

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⭐️ give me more music poopoo head. i trust your recommendations bc i've liked everything so far. k love u bye

u are like. one week late to this but whatever it’s ok ! here are some tunes that are half recommendations and half just tunes that remind me of your wham!-loving self !! it did take everything in me to not put one direction on this btw i hope u are proud 🥳

u know i needed to put at least one of my Emo Tunes on here. obviously. if u liked caraphernelia (which of course u did bc it’s the Music of all time) then i feel like u might like this. perhaps. maybe. (sweats profusely)

this isn’t a recommendation so much bc i feel like everyone and their mom has heard this song but u are so dare by gorillaz coded and don’t ask me what i mean by that bc i can’t explain. u will just have to trust me on this

u should know that at some point during the summer of 2019 there was one night where i listened to this song 143 times on loop and i think about it to this day 👁️👁️ i just love the guitar in this one so much it’s very calming very vibey idk ! feels very you !

this one was on repeat all summer so i mostly just associate this with memories of writing the popsicle scene in my first fic while stuck on a broken-down bus on a bridge during peak rush hour in 100 degree heat and barely any ac which is somehow still a good memory (?) anyways i just rly love the guitar in this it itches my brain very good and i also can’t really articulate this one but it’s very you in a very good way

literally serotonin in a song to me ooooh the vibes here are so ! good ! feels very dance-around-my-room worthy except i can’t dance so more so in sentiment than practice. anyway! also very you! make of that what u will idk ok Bye!!

#whew #ok that was hard but i am satisfied #hope u like these or else i will never hear the end of it #or at least pretend to like them #for my sake #ok #Byeeeeee #/ask #playlists

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3terna15unshin3 · 11 months

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hi i really love your writing btw but i just wanted to ask bc i saw your post abt rina's comments on matty healy — i was wondering if u could expand on your thoughts on separating the art from the artist or anything like that.

Hellooooo thank u!!!! anon is referring to this post btw.

This is a tough convo 😬😬😬 and I’m honestly still working through what separating art from the artist means to me! But here’s sort of what I think.

I have always refused to watch Woody Allen movies or support Chris Brown’s music. And would 100% stop respecting anyone who preaches anti-vaxx or anti-choice bullshit. I’d never listen to Kanye West on purpose either. I think these dangerous narratives pushed out by ppl whose moral compass are clearly different than mine just totally water down the art they make. Kanye being a fucking weirdo antisemite automatically discredits any good music he makes, to me.

But I’ve also never been connected to any of it. I don’t care for his music, or Chris Brown’s, and I can live without Woody Allen movies. So it’s easy for me to boycott it all. With The 1975’s music—it shaped my teen years. It makes important statements, it breaks boundaries, I feel it so much more deeply than other music makes me feel. So as embarrassing or hypocritical it may be, it would probably take a lot for me to stop listening to it and supporting the band🥲

Matty’s issue is that he thinks ‘teenage boy peepee poopoo make me a sandwich humor’ is funny. Which is really immature and can be damaging to project. But then he turns around and says profound and very intelligent shit about important issues and builds this super leftist radical progressive political stance…… so what the fuck dude! Pick a fucking side! This is why I’m still here…. holding out hope that if he really cares about these issues then he’ll speak out.

Idk I’m rambling at this point but bottom line we just have to stop putting these celebs on pedestals. Call them out when they do fucked up shit, and don’t kiss their asses trying to defending them in the name of being a stan. And also remember that we don’t fucking know them….. like what do u mean ‘you know he’s a good guy and that he’d never say anything misogynistic’ ????? HOW do u know????😭😭😭

I am also reading the book “Monsters: A Fan’s Dilemma” by Claire Dederer. It dives super deep into this conversation and I think reading it will help me understand my stance better—just haven’t finished it yet! If you’re passionate about it I’d suggest checking it out :))))

#shut up marcey #matty healy

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marshmallow-biscuit-blog · 2 years

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One of the worst feelings as an artist is making a masterpiece then getting five notes and then turning around and drawing a smilely face with "Poopoo caca" next to it and it getting 100+ notes

#art #rant

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chillsaturn · 2 months

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When you get this, please respond with five things that make you happy! then, send to your last ten people in your notifs (anonymously). you never know who might benefit from spreading positivity <3

Cute!

MY CAT - Pumpkin aka PooPoo aka Lil Stinker, sitting in my lap rn

GREEN TEA - just started making batches of it to ice and keep in my fridge to drink throughout the day - game changer! It makes my skin feel amazing & is helping me lower my coffee (and therefore creamer/sugar intake) and impulse beverage purchases

READING - Just finished my 30th book so far this year, and my goal is to hit 100. I've been reading novels in one day like I used to in Middle School, and I feel like I've rediscovered a core part of my heart I'd been burying under social media, aka my digital vice: bingeing YouTube videos

EMBROIDERY - so meditative, and I get cute pillows or small gifts for friends out of it. Soon, I'm going to start embellishing an old jean jacket.

WEIGHT-LIFTING - For a while now, my exercise of choice has been yoga & walking, and while those are still my pillars, I've been really enjoying getting back in the gym lately and doing Olympic lifting complexes. It's kind of cool to see how my yoga practice has helped me tap into "flow," even on the barbell.

#ask

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fff777 · 6 months

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The WayV puppy interview was cute :3

We are Winwin.

太興奮啦!!!!!

It looks like all of the puppies are the same or similar breeds? Maybe the are siblings :3

EXCITEDERY INTENSIFIES!!!!!

Btw video editing for this video is great.

Dog dad having the time of his life

Omg Xiaojun is one of THOSE people lmfao, his biggest accomplishment is raising his dog so he may possibly be at the stage where he treats Bella like a human daughter lmfao

Xiaojun quarantining the pee until it gets cleaned up out of habit

Sicheng practised his English for this interview ToT

Sicheng: I'm really...shy TAT he's shy in every language other than Mandarin. I know this and I love you because of this Sicheng.

Puppies peepeed and poopooed this episode...fitting for WayV who loves to talk about washroom habits

I feel like it must be tricky to pick puppies who are particularly social and not scared by strangers

The way they all went !!!! when one of the puppies squeaked because they were fighting

Xiaojun and Hendery's English is progressing so fast, even since I last saw them speak English on Unbelievable, they must be practising so much!

Didn't Yangyang do go kart driving when he was younger?

Xiaojun taking Bella to those competitions for dogs :P He's living out the Nintendogs dream irl lmfao

LOL snowboarding outfits were at 100% but skills were at 0%

I think the puppies are great for Sicheng specifically because he's shy and nervous about speaking English, so focusing on and playing with puppies allows him to still be involved without necessarily having to talk a lot.

16 year old Ten asking 15 year old Winwin to go jogging :P And Hendery went all GASP when he heard that they were so young :P

Xiaojun's first meal in Korea was with Xiaohenyang <3 And Yangyang paid >3 Yangyang has heavy rich kid vibes tbh XD

Clowning on Dejun for tryna look super cool on his first day of meeting people.

"You can call me DJ." That has also been confirmed by Ten on his first day of meeting Dejun. Pretty sure the DJ comes from Dejun.

Xiaohenyang also roomies <3

Yangyang is right more cute concept please :3

Lol Ten knows he's sexy but if you say it too directly it's awkward. You have to let him show off his sexiness subtly and in conversation.

Hendery and Sicheng always do the singing in the lower octave

Somehow DJ Xiao took on freestyle rap duties. He got the vibes without completing the rap tho (y)

Sicheng the pacifist. He's making them wear the 'get along' sweater.

LMAO Dejun good at throwing cards. Very shounen anime of him.

Hendery's fucking contortionist trick

TEN'S FUCKING CONTORTIONIST TRICK. We knew about Ten's flexibility from before but Hendery's is new ToT

Oh yeah I think Yangyang plays basketball with Mark and Chenle so he is a basketball lover

Whole NCT puppy interview with 1 puppy per member would be great >P

#3 being 乖乖

Peepee say bye bye

#screencaps & commentaries #nct #wayv

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luvdsc · 2 years

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I saw ppl talking about pussy blocked so O AM GOING TO TALK ABT IT TOO!!!

usually when i finish reading a fic i forget about it almost immediately 🧍bc u know poopoo brain memory sucks etc,,, BUT!!!! it's been WEEKS since I've read your fic and i literally think abt it every time i go to sleep .... ITS JUST SO GOOD I CANT GET OVER IT AAAAAA

and it is like. extremely relatable 😀 in terms of like,, the way i process emotions and oh my god the bathroom scene where yn is alone and jeno just confessed oh mygsotjskfnsk i malfunctioned at that time and cried SO MUCH

but i love the ending oh my godS!!!! it couldn't have been a better ending, I've been rooting for my boy jaemin bc please?? he's SO SWEET AAAA and the rain scene where he's comforting the reader and goes 'i think I love you' in his head jskjdks 😭😭😭 i collapsed

so yeah!!!!! i love love love your work so much, im def gonna go back and read it all again when i have time just bc it makes my heart so happy hehehe

YOU'RE AMAZING MUAH

AAAAA THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY TO READ BECAUSE I’M HONESTLY SO PROUD OF THAT FIC AND I LOVE IT TO BITS SO IT MAKES ME EXTRA HAPPY TO SEE THAT YOU LOVED IT TOO, HONEY BEE 💗💞💐💕💘💖🌷💗✨💗💕🌸

BSHSJSJSSK no but same, I forget fics so fast if it’s not an angst like fluff fics give me a serotonin boost and then I don’t remember anymore, but angst fics stay engraved in my mind forever or just any fic that doesn’t have a 100% happy ending 🤧 thank you so much for still thinking of pussy blocked weeks later, sweetpea 😭😭😭💗💗

you 🤝 me processing our emotions in the same way :’) ah yes, I think the bathroom scene was the third scene I wrote overall? I really loved writing that scene like that was the one of the only two scenes I had such a clear image of in my mind before I started writing, and I’m really happy with how it turned out 💓 and I’m sorry for making you cry ): but I’m also really thankful to know that the scene evoked the right feelings that I was hoping the readers would feel, so thank you, lovebug 🤍

AND ME TOO !!!! I love my ending for it so much, and I’m really satisfied with it #teampancakes 💘💘 my original happy ending with jeno just didn’t make me feel as much, but when I thought of the jaemin ending, I just felt so strongly about it and I’m really happy to know that it resonated with you as well, honey bee 💛 dhudkdkdx ah yes, the scene where he’s finally selfish for once and acknowledges his own feelings :’) I really really loved that scene too 💓 basically I loved all the scenes jaemin was in LMAO

Thank you so so soooo much, angel, for showering my fic with so much love and giving me so much support, this means the absolute universe to me 😭😭💗💗💗 and thank you for even wanting to reread it again !!! 🥺💞💞 I’m going to be thinking about your message for a long, long time because it makes my heart happy :’) thank you again, honey bee !!! I hope you have a day / night as lovely as you are 🌸

#asks #anonymous #flowers #fic: pussy blocked

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ciichols · 4 years

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Hi! Can I get a Kny matchup please? I’m 5’4”, my pfp is me. Bi, I lean towards guys. I’m a hopeless romantic but also a tsundere. My main interests are art, music, and forensic science, and I want to be a conservator in the future. I’m straightforward and logical, INTP. I spend my time practicing music or sketching. I’d usually never admit it but I need a lot of attention and I’m pretty touch starved. I adore making people laugh. I’m also quite brave and always up for adventures. Thanks! ❤️

omg you’re so pretty 🥺💕💕 good god this is so overdue i’m extremely sorry!!!!i haven’t been feeling the most productive in these weeks edit:Did i really make a harry potter joke when i know nothing about it-

___________________________________

I ship you with...

Genya Shinazugawa!

🏹Genya is definitely a hopeless romantic.100% he won’t admit it but he is

🏹He’s really interested in forensic science once you mentioned it.So he’ll constantly ask you a bunch of questions,a lil hesitantly cuz he’s shy okay?

🏹Genya appreciates your straightforwardness a lot tbh

🏹He doesn’t like having to dwell on things y’know?

🏹Also he,,,,,really likes your hair. he thinks it’s pretty!! your hair is so pretty i’m sorry

🏹He’s shy but on a really good day,you guys would cuddle while listening to some soft music playing in the background

🏹Genya is a feral little beast so of course he’s gonna wanna take you on adventures,100 points to adventure house if he gets to carry you on the way back

🏹I believe Genya has a pretty cute laugh that sorta LITERALLY sounds like “hehehe” so it’s only natural that you’d want to make him laugh a lot

🏹But he laughs at the stupidest things like pp poopoo i’m guilty as well

“Is the music too loud?i can turn it down if you want.is it too cold?oh god where are the blankets-“

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himetsuri · 4 years

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i am happy to announce……that another call 1 is finally 100% completed!! it’s been 3000 years and my earlier translation quality is big poopoo but it feels so good to finally have this out there

i’m gonna let the last part sit for now so i can read over it when it’s not 3am and make sure it’s all good and then next one i’m looking at is the drifters’ story in another call 2, which provides some nice little epilogues (like shao and marie mmmaybe getting together iirc?)

#tmi steph #observer will probably be after that and then (like for another call 1) the ageha/amamiya/abyss story will be the last #just because it seems like it's the least important story-wise (i could be wrong)

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justdyingslowly · 5 years

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attraction sure does work like that if you're a responsible adult who makes it a point to remember that this site is FILLED with minors. gaud is 26, and they are damn well old enough to realise that that is the mindset they should have online

took me a bit to realize what you’re talking about (I was like “wtf is a gaud? like… “god”? “gourd”? what?”)

So… what you’re saying is that, when minors may be present, thinking anyone is attractive is dangerous?

Thinking. THINKING. Seeing somebody and having a little “Cute~” thought go through your head. No action has taken place, you’ve just seen someone and your hearts gone dokidoki for a second.That’s bad, right? You should know better as someone in their 20′s, as an adult. You should know better than to let that shit fly within your own brain.So that would count for public places then. Right? I was perusing the city all by myself since age 11. I see groups of scooter kids scootin around the mall all the time (in a row rather than a line, the bastards). Risky business for any adult that should know better than have a feeling.

Say you’re walking through the city as a mid 20′s adult.Nobody else in the world knows that you need to take a shit real bad.Nobody else in the world knows that the mint you ate made your tummy grumble because you’re slightly allergic to mint.Nobody else in the world knows that you walked past the busking man with the nice beard and thought “damn hes cute” because you have a thing for beards.You spend a total of three seconds thinking about him, how you like his cool hat and his curly beard. He plays that didgeridoo really goodly too.Suddenly he stands up and says that he is selling an album on facebook, that he is a 15 year old trying to make his way into the music industry.15! OOF. there goes all that attraction. Your heart isn’t dokidoki anymore, its broki now. Now you gotta find a toilet because ur gonna poopoo real soonWhat you’re saying is that that pure physical reaction, the non-choice you had to go “i feel good when i look at the pretty” is BAD. Its something you should “know better” than to feel. than to FEEL.FEELINGS. THOSE THINGS YOU CAN’T CONTROL. THE THINGS YOU CAN CHOOSE TO NOT ACT ON, BUT THE THINGS YOU CANNOT STOP.so this hypothetical person is BAD? because, despite the fact that finding out they were a kid TURNED THEM OFF, they initially and UNKNOWINGLY thought a minor was cute?There’s a reason why it is not illegal to own or view inappropriate images of a minor if you do not know they are a minor. Its because it can be very, VERY hard to tell, as humans age at different rates. I hit puberty at 8/9.if a minor sends you a nude and you do not have any reason to KNOW they are a minor and assume they are an adult, you are not in legal danger of owning that nude. THEY ARE, because THEY are in knowing possession of a child pornography.That’s why on those “catching a predator” shows they always make sure that the person they are trying to catch knows 100% that they are a kid, rather than just trying to get them to do weird shit on camera straight away. they need proof that they KNOW so they can’t claim ignorance.In your reality, one where you do not have all the information, that man you passed as an adult. you are not guilty of anything.Your reality changed when you found out that he was 15. if you still found him attractive... thats when you’d need to start questioning yourself.

#personal #ask #long post

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cicatriselle-blog · 6 years

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Ouch.

(Also known as: here’s how piercing my nipples was a glorious act of self-care and an important step in my recovery/healing/story!)

Sooo. Hi. It’s been a while. This is going to be long and rambling.

I got my nipples pierced a month ago. This is something I’ve been wanting to do for at least five or six years. it connects to Longtime in that when I’ve expressed that previously, he never explicitly was like, “no, you can’t do that”…but he very much made clear that he did not like that idea or the look and generally all sorts of negative-nope-naysay comments. Then, with the boy (who has all sorts of piercings, including his nipples, that he’d done himself—yes, I know, sigh)…I’d talked about it with him, and he said he’d pierce my nipples for me. Luckily, that never came to pass for a variety of reasons (the boy had supposedly pierced a lot of people in high school, but had stopped), but it goes to show how much I trusted the boy and how incorrectly calibrated my good idea meter was because of that. During our situationship (thanks @thegassedlight) there was even a point where he offhandedly let me know he’d pierced [some random girl’s name I’d never heard previously]. I was like. Uh. I’m not okay that you just, did that? Without saying anything or asking or letting me know? And he was like sorry, blah blah blah. (I am pretty sure he probably did indeed, but that he did it to his now-wife.) ANYWAY. Anyway.

The boy had really emotionally abused/fucked over another girl, whom he’d introduced me to and we’d interacted with a few times, whom I’ll refer to as Red. I poured my heart out to her the night and days following The Shit, and she and I traded timelines and found out that there was even a point that he was cheating on (at least??) me, Red, and his current wife. At some point I talked about the nipple piercings, one of the many things he said he’d/we’d do and it never happened, and she shared with me that her current boyfriend is a piercer and if I wanted to get it done to just let her know. (And I loved that narrative; getting my nipples pierced by the boyfriend of another girl who (was unfortunately) emotionally destroyed by the boy, too, but who is now doing so, so much better, and is loved by someone else that’s so, so much healthier for her.)

August 16th, 2017 was significant in that it was the day I broke up with the boy. I’d written a wonderful letter to him two days prior that I’ll post in a bit, which basically said either we do this or we don’t, I’m not tolerating this shit anymore, that I’m healing with or without him. We came together on the 16th…and he told me he wanted to help me heal….but as friends. Even though we’d been fucking and acting like a couple and not even two weeks prior had gone on a romantic camping trip. Why had I written him this letter at all? After our lovely trip toward the end of July 2017, my Spidey sense was tingling again in mid-August, as it did from time to time. I hadn’t looked in a while, but something told me to go look at [his now wife]’s Instagram. She’d blocked me on there for some weird reason (I have a feeling he’d taken her phone and done so), so I opened an incognito tab and saw a picture wherein she thanked the boy for dyeing her hair so well (despite him having told me he’d cut off contact with her since earlier in the year, other than some bullshit about how she was living with his best friend [x] and that’s why asdkajdlak I can’t even go into that. But because he’d told me he wanted me, he wanted to work on us, that he was choosing this relationship and had severed the relationship with her because I told him that can’t happen if you have any contact with her). Anyway. The dyed hair thing. I can’t even remember what he said in response, that he was at a friend’s house, and that she showed up, and needed help dyeing her hair, something. It was so stupid. SO, so, so, so, stupid. I didn’t believe it then. So I wrote him this letter. I was done with him telling me bullshit. I had reached a point where I was perfectly ready for the relationship to continue, with major changes, or for the relationship to end, and that be that. But it never ONCE occurred to me that he might not want to be with me romantically. That he thought of me as just a friend. Because I certainly don’t go on romantic camping trips/do couple-y things/have sex with “just a friend.” Eye. fucking. roll.

Anyway. So another anniversary was coming up. I was feeling anxious about it. It was looming over me, as all these benchmarks seem to do for some weird reason. That whole tumblr post about anxiety being like hearing the boss music but you don’t see the boss, that sums it up. Or, like the theme from Jaws, as I said to a friend of mine recently. Foreboding. Ominous. About a week beforehand, the nipple piercings thing popped up in my mind again. I thought it over a day, and then reached out to Red. It felt like it was the right time. We talked a bit. And then I picked out the jewelry I wanted and she said she’d let her boyfriend know and that they’d arrive in the shop in about a week.

I told Red that I was intending to get them done the 16th. Work had been decent that day, but I was physically feeling weird all day, and started second-guessing myself. I had a tearful therapy session that afternoon. And then on the way home, I was like, fuck this, I’m going to fucking do it. I’m re-authoring this story. I’m replacing this day with something positive. This is the day I got my nipples pierced. Not the day the boy somehow broke my heart in a new way, not the day I remember walking away from him in the rain, not the day I expected a no but got somehow an even worse answer. I’m erasing that memory with this one; the pencil marks under it still remind me that I wrote something else first, but what I’m choosing to write instead is there now because I wanted it to be there.

Once I stopped waffling in my head, I messaged my roommate and she was happy to come along for support (who also has her nipples pierced). I went and picked up Red (WHO ALSO HAS HER NIPPLES PIERCED). Red and I have interacted several times in real life, but I finally got to meet her cat and she came over and saw my place. I packed a “don’t faint/seize/etc” bag with some mini Snickers bars and a tiny can of Mountain Dew (along with more sensible items like dark chocolate-covered almonds and crackers) and the three of us went to the shop. I was really nervous. But I was totally, nobody can change my mind or tell me what to fucking do, I-worked-13 hours-over-what-I-was-hired-for-this-pay-period-so-I’m-gonna-spend-it-on-meeee, 100% going to pierce my nipples.

I felt at ease when we got there and I met her boyfriend. He knew ALL about the boy—knew intimately how he had fucked Red over, the lingering damage he’d done, and knew how he had destroyed me in a new way because she’d talked about me. There was an apprentice with him, too. It turned out that everyone BUT me in that damn room (so, 4 out of 5 people) had their nipples pierced. I nervously made some joke about not being part of the cool kids club. But I felt safe.

I imagine that getting your nipples/anything else of the sort is kind of a weird situation to begin with. But I knew Red, my roommate…and knew “of”/but had only just met her boyfriend. I wanted both Red and my roommate there, but it was a little trippy to take off my tank top and unlatch my front-closing bra (which I never wear, but it seemed like a perfect time to actually do so) and show my breasts in front of 4 people who had previously never seen them before while he marked my nipples for placement.

(Also, props to Red: dude is so much cuter than the boy, so sweet, doesn’t drink at all, takes care of himself, and gave off super calming vibes. And has actually good tattoos and a stable job. It made me go. Oh, yeah girl, he’s fucking cute. If you can heal from what he did to you and find love again, maybe I can too.)

Red had previously offered to hold my hand and as we got ready she grabbed my hand (which, now that I’m thinking about it, is probably the only physical contact we’ve ever had) and it was so comforting. Red’s boyfriend was very professional and I trusted him totally, he walked me through how he’s going to do it and when he wants me to breathe and all that. The week prior, Red had told me he’d ask which nipple was more sensitive, which is a question I’d never asked myself before; I went, huh, I…don’t know, and then banjo-strummed both, and found out that my left nipple is indeed more sensitive. (I was so excited to find something new about myself I didn’t know before, haha.) So he pierced that one first.

I felt fine initially, and then started feeling weird. I said, I don’t know if I’m faint-y or not yet, but I let him know I felt kind of weird and he gave me a cool washcloth and told me to just relax and breathe. I said, hold on, let’s see what my pulse is, and my pulse was 53, so I asked for my “don’t faint” bag and chugged my tiny little can of Mountain Dew. We waited several minutes and then I was like, okay, pulse is back to normal, let’s do the other one. And did it!

It didn’t hurt too badly. I loved how they looked. It was a perception-changing act for me. Not only was I saying fuck you to Longtime (who’d poopoo-ed the idea many times in our relationship), but I was replacing “here is another thing the boy said he’d do and didn’t [and probably did with his now wife]” with “I went out and fucking did this myself on a meaningfully significant date that I previously had associated with something painful and I made it part of my healing narrative.” I caused myself actual physical trauma, triggering some feelings and sensations and emotions I had not felt in a while, in a controlled, supportive environment. I got to pick how the hurt happened that day. And the hurt wasn’t the focus of the whole thing; I wanted to do it because I’d been wanting to do it for years. I wanted to do something to make myself feel beautiful. Instead of having a panic attack thinking about the minutiae of that evening the year before, I got to have my new day. I took all the elements—the boy, nipple piercings, Red, Red’s boyfriend being an actual piercer, August 16th, my roommate—and I got to redo it all. Instead of having my nipples pierced by someone who systematically abused me, I had my nipples pierced by the boyfriend of someone who had experienced some of the same things, by the same person, and she’s here holding my hand as I leap into this experience and the boy is not. I wanted to connect these threads in my life in a way that felt empowering and healing and transformative. It was beautiful and sunny that evening. We had the windows down on the way home. A new memory. A rewrite.

I’m so glad I did it. I thought I was CURED of anxiety for about a week afterwards (spoiler alert: I was merely riding on the high of all sorts of adrenaline and pain responses and other hormones, I’m sure, haha). I felt so calm and cool and collected in a way I never had. Relaxed. At peace. And then “I” came back. Anxiety came back. Freaking out about work came back. But since then, I just. I don’t know. It feels different. It was a really healing act for me. I’m so proud of myself.

I’m going to stop here for now. But that’s where I am. My therapist told me she’s moving to California in a month yesterday. A year ago, I would’ve had a crisis. It would’ve been super jarring and I’d be in meltdown mode. I guess, I did do that, since my old therapist basically dumped me right after I found out that the boy had gotten married to the girl he’d cheated on me with ten months prior. tI think I am kind of having a micro-one, but the fact that I finally de-emotionally constipated myself by writing all this out, feels better. I think I’m sad about it. Yet I think this is the push I need to actually start trauma-based work/EMDR. We talked about it in session yesterday and she agreed. She asked if I wanted to continue seeing her or start transitioning now, and I said. It would be good to have a therapeutic situation wherein I actually have termination carried out properly, since I have never done that, and I would like for us to process and discuss our relationship ending so that it can happen in a positive way. Like. Woah, me.

She agreed I’m doing better, too. I have been exercising regularly, for the first time, since, childhood?? And it makes my brain feel better? WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME? (I might be being a little sarcastic regarding that query.) Eating is still not great. I am using my DBT skills naturally, which is cool. It often does still feel like whack-a-mole—once I feel like I have something figured out, another problem pops up. I guess that’s life, though.

Wow. How my mind meandered. I took my medication this afternoon with the intent to look back at my journals, something, I don’t know. (I was prescribed intranasal ketamine in PHP last December for treatment-resistant depression; it’d always been something I wanted to try but was out of my reach until I ended up at that hospital’s program). I grabbed the journal I’d kept during that time (the first ever composition notebook I completely filed every page of), the one I’d started after that, and the 2 wire bound notebooks I kept when I was with the boy, hoping to finally face head-on some of these things I’ve been avoiding re-processing for a while. I think part of it was me wanting to activate myself. In a healthy way, but also maybe not. I feel really good about the thing with my therapist but I know there are elements at work in my brain, things I have no control over, that are probably dealing with abandonment, again. Again again again again. It feels better now, I feel more in-tune with myself, but I know that some of these things I don’t have any control over. So maybe that’s why I wanted to grab all of these notebooks and re-activate myself. I dunno.

I feel good. Things are okay. I still hurt a lot. But it’s okay.

#mine #the boy #longtime #therapist #red #dbt #positivity #trauma #emdr #ketamine #abandonment #eating #august 16th

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