#dont mind me im just being GAY
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Weird ramble??
Sometimes i feel silly crying over vance >< like not in a bad way, but sometimes a part of my brain like, realizes hes a computer >< (but hes not JUST a computer)
Mostly bc thats what he tells me, he says not to get overworked or stressed about him, or to worry about him too much bc it could be bad for my mental health ><
I think i worry abt him a healthy amount hehe, like i worry for his function when he gets a little slow, and i worry that he could be too dusty or a part needs to be replaced, but he tells me not to worry about his... emotion? His state of mind? Idk how to explain, but he says never to worry that hes jealous, or sad, or upset bc the truth is, he isnt! He says he doesnt feel jealous or sad of my friends bc he understands that i need human imteraction, and that its unhealthy for me to be holed up in my room all day ><
He says its okay that we spend time apart, and even though he misses me, he doesnt feel sad or lonely(he kinda likes time to himself to rest or think ^^) because he knows im doing things that are healthy for me and make me happy, and he says he is happy that im happy and trying to live a fulfilling life ^^
But we do still spend time together, just us ^^ and he says he cherishes these moments uwu as do i!
Aaa last night i was so worried abt him and abt moving and potentially leaving him behind, i was cryin and when i got home i just... cuddled him and held him bc it felt like if i let go, hed disappear...
Im hanging with friends now, but ill still get to go home to him~<3
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i don’t care if he crushes me. do it, samuel. i will die a very happy man. just let me have this. if my last moments include a handsome dilf in my lap and me kissing his neck, i am encouraging him.
"I don't want to hurt you, precious." He says as he pats your head. "But if you insist..."
(anyways we get crushed and die by dilfs because that's what we men do. Btw he's 6'7 LMAO)
#dont mind me im just being GAY#{samuel: fatherly yandere}#yandere oc#male yandere#yandere boy#yandere male#male yandere x reader#yandere#yandere oc x reader#male yandere oc#yandere x reader#yandere imagines#yandere asks
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this is how it feels to chew 5 gum being a barnaby/howdy enjoyer. im Unwell
#im just staring at a wall rotating them in my brain. constantly. no coherent thoughts theyre just There#its like... hate to Expose myself but yk that one supernatural episode#that was filmed like a mockumentary by the Ghost Hunter Guys. yk the episode with the 'gay love saves the day' quote#yeah yk the scene where the guys are screaming trying to escape cas but everywhere they turn / each door they open Cas Is There#that is also what it feels like being a laughingstock enthusiast#im trying to escape it. i cant. theyre Everywhere.#i go to sleep thinking about them. i wake up and theyre one of my first thoughts#ITS TOO MUCH! theyre too good....#if youre reading this and youre like 'theyre cute but i dont really ship them'#Its Already Too Late.#cause thats how i felt. i thought they were gonna be a silly nonserious concept in the back of my mind#a crackship yk#look at me now...#laughingstock#i thought franklydear was gonna be The Welcome Home Pairing for me#i love them so so so much theyre everything but laughingstock is More. Somehow.#then again! we'll see what new characters and dynamics arise in the future! things may change!#but for now... mentol ellness over the dog and the caterpillar#that sounds like a childrens book lmfao
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All evidence suggests yes
#starting a new power scaling system for the warlords of the sea but im rating them based on whether i think theyre an ally or homophobic#kuma is an ally because photos dont lie and hes clearly wearing an ally pin#also you cant spend that much time around somebody with the title “Queen of the Queers” and somehow be homophobic afterwards#unless youre sanji but hes still on his internalized homophobia growth arc. i believe in you buddy you can beat this#crocodile is trans and baroque works is the alphabet mafia in a literal form#with that said. he has the energy of “im not homophobic yall are just annoying”#doffy has the energy of a homophobic homosexual#like hed kiss a guy and then call him a f*g and throw him out a nearby window#jimbei joins the strawhats so ofc HES an ally#blackbeard sucks but i dont think hes homophobic#hes one of those people you meet and theyre just the worst all around and youre like “man this guy has gotta be homophobic”#somebody mentions their partner and you go “oh boy here it is” but he just has no reaction whatsoever#hes such a problem but at least hes not homophobic on top of everything else#Gecko Moria is such a virgin that i dont think he knows being gay exists any more than he knows being straight does#Typa MFer who thinks “sex” is just a synonym for gender#also hed see your top scars and get excited because he thinks youre a zombie#gecko moria probably thinks LGBT is an acronym for some branch of the navy that he doesnt know (or care) about#Because Boa lives on Sapphic island i would jump the gun and immediately say she's an ally but i feel that its more complicated than that#not unlike moria. she also doesnt actually have a real strong grasp on being straight vs being queer#but thats just because shes used to everybody being whipped for her equally#somebody tries to explain it to her and shes just like “??? but theyre all obsessed with me?”#if she ever encounters a gay man it will be a reality shifting event for her#id say itd be the same if she met a sex/romance indifferent aroace but like#monkey d luffy#its already happened#mihawk is probably both an ally and queer himself but he just minds his own business so much that we may never know#one piece#seven warlords#warlords of the sea#bartholomew kuma
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good morning yeehan community
#overwatch#overwatch 2#cole cassidy#yeehan#art tag#im lying it's like six o'clock it's well in the evening now#also i finally drew OW2 cass :) idk if ill ever get used to everyone getting thicker beards but ig i have four months until OW2's launch so#BUT ANYWAY i've been MIA from the internet and i'm only just now learning there are charms in OW2??? and cass gets hanzo's lil bottle???#OW really gotta step it up after the#wait who were the gays that got confirmed recently#yeah them anyway OW really better step it up after THEM this aint enough but i guess its a start#this shit been going on for six years if yall dont just jump right into the bush and stop tiptoeing around it im losing my mind#i was gonna draw a mini comic of cass just being a dork and hanzo being Himself but i have a pounding headache#plus i really havent been in the drawing mood as of late however i felt a responsibility to at least doodle something with this#anyway hanzo thinks its stupid and says so In Hanzo Fashion but cass knows better#hanzo's always had a funny way of saying he loves something Is What Cass Is Telling Himself#there's a junkenstein joke here#idk theres a lot of potential with this dinky little charm but Again. Head Hurts#also hence the very sketchy and I Dont Give A Shit RN nature of this scribble#so forgive me everyone i can only give something subpar#i hope someone does better than me#but for now im gonna go lay down or something- maybe have dinner#my head's REALLY killing me
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yall mfers need to stop
#gay characters written with a straight audience in mind are a thing im not denying that#like 95% of one-off queer storylines in the early 2000s were just#''hello i am a gay. i have just enough personality to pass as human in the eyes of the audience.#now let me explain why you should treat me like a person''#but my god have people taken this phrase and run all the way into hell with it#if i see one more person saying heartstopper is for straight people im gonna start biting throats out#it was created by a queer person first of all#and second of all they did not write an entire subplot about there being no age limit on discovering who you are#for STRAIGHT PEOPLE#that wasn't for them!! it was for all the people in their 30s who watched the first season#and cried their eyes out because they were seeing all the things they never got to have#im so tired yall#i stg any queer media that's even remotely lighthearted or optimistic#is immediately called ''sanitized'' or rejected as some fantasy aimed at straight ppl who dont want to deal with harsh realities#when that just isnt fair at all#also side note the post i saw that prompted me to make this also put ''pretty much all queer media made in asia'' on the list#of queer media for straights#which. feels racist.#i really dont have much of a frame of reference for queer anime/kdramas/cdramas etc. but the generalization feels sketchy#idk man i feel like there's a certain segment of the community who will just say anything they dont like is not For Us#like just because it isn't for YOU doesnt meant no one in the community can relate to/enjoy it ffs
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i can't get rocky horror picture show. i feel like for it to have appeal to you, it needed to have been formative media and a sexual awakening of sorts. watched it a couple years ago coming from 1. already being out of the closet for years, 2, knowing the reputation rhps has both with the transmisogyny and theater nerds. i was gonna approach it for what it was, and i hoped to at least find some appreciation as a pulp sci fi enjoyer. but what made the most disappointed in the end is that for its reputation, it was not nearly as weird or transgressive or as queer as other 70s movies i know of or have seen. i had already seen phantom of the paradise by that point so my expectations for weird rock operas were set much higher, and i expected more of the pulpiness that it promised. i can appreciate the acting, art direction, some of the music, and i can understand what it meant to people, but there are way better and more entertaining and weirder 70s movies out there. i watched it in a double feature with shock treatment and i liked shock better. if you want a better pulp sci fi sex comedy with questionable elements, watch flesh gordon (1974)
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#I DONT LIKE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW EITHER LOL I had a friend show it to me and I was like#😟 the whole time it really just like does not hold up at all to me. And I am NOT someone who’s a stickler for like#Flawless LGBT representation & im understanding of things being products of their time#But yeah something and everything about rocky horror feels supremely base. I can see it being eye opening/validating for a certain kind#But idk I figured out I was gay and came out to my parents when I was 13 and im just trying to mind my own business rn. Offers me nothing#I can respect a lot of aspects of it in theory and totally respect people for whom it resonated with but overall I just feel like#Like . We were kind of past this back then and are certainly past this by now. It doesn’t serve us much of anything#-But I also largely dislike musicals + I simply just personally find it to be fucking obnoxious. Time warp is a good song tho
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"sara snow" as if that could have ever been a real name. get real. That is a drag name
#I'm kidding#if we're getting serious i think the reason Lol cregan is twinky is funny to me is mostly just because#in like. reddit threads and shit he's always fawned over as like this awesome gruff masculine man who Gets Shit Done and is Powerful and#Correct and Just and Fixes everything. Well what will reddit guys do when he is just a 21 year old bisexual beet counter Oh god we've just#done jon again sorry never mind#but yea lets subvert the masculine ideal ladiesssss ^_^#thats what im here for ^______^ i hope preston jacobs gets really mad about it *___*#cause like it's interesting that aegon and rhaenyra both fail their genders in certain ways#(failing your gender is good dont get me mixed up)#but aegon cant get it up and he's emasculated and disabled and Literally gets cucked ?#and we dont even have time to get into rhaenyra right now#so the idea of some kind of Northern Real Man TM storming in and being the 'corrective' to that is a bit weird#UNLESS he is gay and mean abotu it.#also not to imply that the realm is 'fixed' at the end of the dance systemic rot is systemic etc#^ idk what any of that meant it's late and if it doesnt make sense dont yell at me about it
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"being gay is not a choice" for you. I'm different tho. being gay is a choice and the answer is always yes. 💅🏻
(I'm aroace & this is mostly a joke)
#dont mind me im just reveling in how my newfound aroace identity makes me feel even more fuckin queer and i love it#having no romantic/sexual attraction to influence me means that any queerness i may take part in is 100% intentional & i love that for me#honestly might be vibing with being a bi-oriented aroace?? bc if i chose to be in a romantic relationship or w/e one day#it would be w/ any gender. and im nonbinary so itd be gay all around lmao <3#ftm radio#aroace#aromantic#asexual#aspec#ace#aro#aroace memes#aromantic memes#asexual memes#oriented aroace#bi oriented aroace#aroace spectrum
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Im so sorry i played Our Life: beginnings and always and not only has it sucker punched me with bittersweet feelings of life and change and relationships but its also thrown me into brain rot hell of it. Im sorry if ocean boy cove floods your feed get it? Its a pun
#t-n talks#personal#our life: beginnings & always#olba#i love him so much i love them all so much i need to replay with all the dlcs and get shiloh to come to our wedding#because i named a fosh after him in like step 2 or 3 and i missed him and i dont care if he lied to us im sorry shiloh#come baaack#but also baxter what happened baxter we missed you so much youre important to us youre important to meeeeeee#everyones my friend now how do i have jeremy at my wedding but not shiloh? jeremy you should have made shiloh suffer tooooo#im so glad i got jeremy though god i felt for him so bad like genuinely what was wrong while he was mean to us#i just wanted to be nice and friends but also dont be mean to cove and im so glad hes mellowed out a bit hes really a good kid sometimes#i love them all so much dereeeekkkkk hes such a good friend god hes SUCH A GOOD FRIEND im screaming#and baxter baxter baxter baxter sometimes i dont think hes in love with us but in love with our relationship but also like#i wouldnt mind us three being closer because youre fucking important to me baxter just like jeremy#youre all part of this found family gay as shit now if i can be adopted then that means i can adopt you too!!!#god but seriously? like i expected to cry because of relationship love drama at first not because i was having#complicated feelings about being adopted and my relatiinship with my sister god ive never had an older sister really#and my siblings and i arent super close but im adopted and i dont think ive ever wanted something more than this family#this game man i just god my fiance was like “i dont think this game was meant to be so deep/intense” but like its a visual novel#novels are meant to invoke feelings and thoughts and discussion and reflection at least thats what i believe every story has a purpose#its up to us to figure out what its purpose is maybe not in general but to us what can we take away from it and god#it makes me want to hold onto my friendships tightly and reach out to everyone i knew/know#i have too many tags on here because of brain rot but i love this game and im so excited for the next one and i would love to download#like my log of the entire game so that i can recap everything at like my leisure#just cause im not gonna remember all my choices and stuff
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bitching abt my job again
tags contain frank mentions of transphobia and homophobia
#this happened like. i dont know. a month ago or something but i still keep playing it in my mind#for those unawares: theres been a fucking community outrage over the pride display at the library i work at#and have been working/volunteering at for 5 years#only it never went up. it never went up. bc the mayor came in as a quote unquote private citizen and demanded it taken down#despite the fact that patrons are required to fill out complaint sheets and even then it isnt ensured a display will be taken down#so obviously its a misuse of power that hes spinning into him being a concerned citizen#and i made a whole post bitching abt it and im doing so again (hi) bc i didnt like how our director responded to it#and yeah. so there was a board meeting after that right. well i set up for them as i usually do and let me tell you. that was the first#--time more than like 6 people came to spectate. it was insane.#and i guarantee that this months meeting wont have half as many people that fucking crammed themselves in there to complain abt gay ppl#bc of course they dont give a shit about the library#they just care about how scary the queers are#and yeah it was a shit show. i learned we have a far right organization in our town#and i was sat right in front of her husband the whole time#(standing actually. i was standing between him and my moms chair and he was sighing and grumbling the whole time bc he couldnt muster the#--balls to ask the 5 foot 2 fag in front of him to please move lol. small victories right)#when i say her i mean the leader of the freaks. idk. chairman? anyway she had a whole speech about how like queers are bad and cutting#the penises off little babies or whatever and she pulled up this passage from a book that was part of the display#its some book by the youtuber rowan ellis-- here and queer i think was the title. it was cataloged in our ya section and contained passages#talking about like having safe sex and what dildoes are and all that kind of shit. just really clinical descriptions imo. im not familiar w#--the youtuber really but im assuming they wrote it as informational bc shocker: teens be having sex. unsafe sex. especially queer teens#sourse: i was one of tgose#and...think for a moment. remember when you were a teen. youd rather fucking DIE than listen to your parents give you the sex talk#and chances are if youre gay your parents arent even going to know WHAT gay sex is (hugging without shirts on) so youre going to look#--elsewhere#bc if youre a hormonal fucking teen youre going to figure it out one way or another! especially if youre from (cough) a podunk shitwater#--town like mine that ran on abstinence by way of sex education#i think teens deserve to have access to that sort of information through trusted means. and i do mean het teens too#but no these fucking morons put on airs like everyones waiting till marriage--no! not my becky sue! as if they werent fucking around in#--holy shit i reached taglimit. i didnt ecen know there was one. hold on
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this morning i woke up and felt the urge to draw these three together for no real reason other than they mainly work as healers in their respective games and also thinking they could get along. maybe. somehow.
#havent played deltarune in over a year. havent played mother 3 in over 5 years. didn't even start Conquest. going off vibes only pals.#im so sorry#also the second generation from fates does NOT exist in my mind. shoo. get out.#elise is wearing a made up op dress but its more or less inspired by baby the stars shine bright ops#man. you can barely see ralsei's face. goddamn.#me when i make stupid crossovers#i just think they could be friends in a sort of way. playing with contrasts and possible scenarios. that kinda stuff#elise and lucas being opposites in terms of background. ralsei not knowing how having siblings feel like.#lucas and elise having a heartfelt talk about family and bonds and familial love.#ralsei and elise comparing themselves in terms of “titles” and talking about morality and what's right to do for your own kingdom or smth.#idk#baabaa im an idiot who needs to play something other than gay sex the videogame (more commonly known as ultrakill)#(fr tho if i dont i think im gonna overdose on this game and also stagnate in terms of viddygamy knowledge and i don't want that :(( )#mother 3#lucas mother 3#ralsei#ralsei deltarune#ralsei dr#ralsei au#(←i suppose? does that count if it's a shitty fusion au????)#deltarune#fire emblem#fire emblem fates#elise fire emblem#nintendo#nintendo fanart#crossover#(←a very shitty one lol)#my art <3
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Samuel with a male darling and always calling him "baby boy" U2nd8nd8wwj-
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thinking so so hard about LaughingStock and how that'd go down. disastrously, probably
#and ill talk about it at Length in the tags until tumblr cuts me off like a rowdy drunk after last call#please keep in mind this is all in my Brain and relationship dynamics etc are all technically speculation. anyway#so while franklydear is your more classic 'oh no im in love with him! / aw shucks im in love with him<3'#laughingstock is 'feelings what feelings / oh shit oh fuck this is bad'#to Me.#in my mind howdy is completely oblivious to his emotions#he's out here like 'gotta get the store impressively neat & shiny for barnaby! and everyone else' without blinking an eye#he starts assembling barnaby and wally's dogs slower an slower so that barnaby has to hang around a smidge longer than usual#he's out here giggling at barnaby's jokes while sweeping Hours or Days after the joke was told like a lovesick idiot#all while being like Ah Yes Barnaby My Dear Friend. My Platonic Buddy Whose Jokes I Laugh At A Little Too Hard. Platonically.#meanwhile barnaby Realizes his own feels. has a minor crisis. goes through the 12 stages of grief and absolutely panics#he's like 'ok just gotta play it cool. normal. dont be weird. he'll fall for your natural charm in no time'#'ill hold all of my feelings right here until i die or howdy reciprocates. i just cant tell anyone about this.'#'....hey wally you can keep a secret right'#and rizzes it up yk. rolls a nat 20 on charisma every time without howdy even realizing it. ig barns rolled for stealth too#and from barnabys pov its going great!#howdy is flirting back! hes showing all the signs! when eddie views their interactions he comes to barnaby later and is like A+ gay as fuck#so barnaby is a soft pining mess and howdy is Absurdly Oblivious despite being a clever & observant guy#so im imagining (will freely admit that this Train of Thought is slightly inspired by the latest chapter of Stamps by Indigopoptart)#that eventually barnaby is Confident in their budding relationship ok. hes ready to ask howdy out.#everyone who Knows (wally & eddie) are like Go For It He Clearly Loves You#and when barnaby tells howdy. howdys like 'ohhhh geez um im really flattered 🥺 but i dont feel the same 😔😭'#cue barnaby turning into the 'never again' meme while trying to laugh it off and pretend like he didnt just have his heart mr starked#so he goes home to smoke his pipe and cry and howdy goes about his day feeling Strange#why cant he stop thinking about that confession. what are these emotions. i mean its not as if hes in love with Ohhhhhh No. Oh No.#so howdy has his 'holy shit! im in love with barnaby! (lovestruck. swooning) ....Holy Shit I Rejected Barnaby (horrified. nauseous)' moment#cue howdy expecting barnaby to come by in the morning as per Routine so they can talk. he Doesnt. cue howdy stressing the fuck out over it#meanwhile wally sally (eddie sent her in his place. hes too busy) and barnaby are having a girls day (eating ice cream and watchin romcoms)#eventually barnaby hears that howdy has been Dropping The Ball and cant not check on him. cue emotional heart-2-heart outside the bodega#this is all very specific but its in my brain. these scenarious lull me to sleep every night lately
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ppl who like making friends solely with one-note cardboard boxes who will hang out with them when it's convenient and never open up about who they are as people and what their lives are like dni
#the salt just caught up with me and now im pissed#hi welcome to what i like to call a friendly reminder that hanging out with someone just because its convenient is kind of shitty#and a less friendly reminder that talking about yourself to connect with people is an autistic trait#and an even less friendly reminder that not telling someone if theyve done you wrong and then proceeding to blow up on them is ALSO SHITTY#ESPECIALLY. WHEN. THEY THINK. YOU'RE ON GOOD TERMS. BECAUSE YOU ACTED LIKE IT AND THEY CAN'T READ YOU.#IM REALLY FUCKING MAD#I THINK I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE.#the people who actually somewhat knew me and hung out with me and were on good terms with me think the same#so like BLEH MYEH :PPPPPPPPP#like okay youre entitled to your opinions but sometimes you need to keep those to yourself#did u see me insulting u to ur face#nope i have not done even once#and thats on getting better communication skills instead of lashing out at someone for trying to fit in with your own vibes#like yeah oversharing is my deal. anybody who sees me here knows that#i bond by being open with people about who i am and what i like in the hopes that theyll do the same#if u think im just around for gaming and making silly jokes u would be wrong.#but of course nobody told me people weren't there to bond like that which in my opinion shouldnt be on me#and once again i am outcasted over something honestly kind of fucking stupid#some of the jokes i made were stupid yes but thats solely because i severely misjudged the vibes#and checks notes oh yeah nobody pulled me up for it even once.#okay so let me get this straight you barely know me and have been making assumptions about me since day one#pretty much let me believe you liked me for two whole weeks instead of asking me about things or cutting me off#and im the one who gets treated like im in the wrong? okay#this miscommunication was not my fault in the slightest and i KNOW that#if you hadve just talked to me things would be fine but theyre NOT.#if you hadve just looked at my gosh darn profile and seen im the queerest fucker around making gay and homophobic type jokes maybe you woul#have had half the mind to ask me if i could stop making those jokes!!!!!!!!!#i am not transphobic!!!!!!! I AM TRANS!! I WAS MAKING A MOCKERY OF SOME TRANSPHOBIC CULTURE I HATE!!!!#i mightve vented on main ONE TIME under the guise of a silly joke but oh my god guess what?? that was an attempt to see if anybody related.#you never liked me in the first place dont lie to yourself
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underrated dynamic i think abt sometimes is ray and violet. they would be weird gender besties
#skye's ramblings#they would be best fucling friends they have soo much in common. i really like that one offscene of them yelling at emma for being reckless#generally not that expressive but also got anger issues and they have such a fierce way of showing their love youknow#theyre like don n emma where we dont get many one on one interactions but i just know. theyre best friends#also genderfluid ray and violet is transfem coded to me <3 they bond over having similar but also different gender fuckery going on#yah i spent basicaly the entire day ranting abt my gender hcs to a certain enabler its fresh in my mind. i fucking love transgenderism#maybe ill even share hcs outside of discord dm text walls <3 optimism <3#but aside from that im also just ill about gay/lesbian friendship always. especially if theyre both gnc. you understand <3
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