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#don't try to claim it was about the actors
rants-about-opm · 5 months
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The protests that happened at the macy's day parade are so important specifically because they tried to stop people from finding out about them. I watched the whole parade and didn't see a single sign or protestor, because try as they may to claim the show is live, they've been doing this for decades, they have full control over what footage the camera's capture and when ads conveniently cut away from what's happening. I found out from the few people still talking about the protests that there were any happening at the parade today.
They know we're all getting so tired and sad of hearing about what's happening. They want to make it as difficult as possible for us to interact with it, in hopes that we give up. They want you to say "It's Thanksgiving, we deserve a break from hearing about this."
I know that it hurts and it's stressful to try to help, but we have to keep going if we want anything to change. The writer and actor strikes were successful because they didn't give in.
It doesn't have to be much, you don't have to spend your days doomscrolling footage and fighting zionists. Just email your representatives each day, boycott businesses that support Israel, and hang on tight. As long as there is hope, there is a way through. The Palestinian people will be free.
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apparentlytheproblem · 8 months
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Hi! I hope you’re having a great day! I had an idea for a fic and I thought I’d send it to you!
Theodore Nott or Mattheo Riddle x fem! Reader
The readers on her phone relaxing after spending all Saturday on homework, and she opens tiktok and watches edits edits of her boyfriend and watches some for like hours and then he walks in- (stay with me bestie-) and she dosent notice, and she’s gotten really horny, needy and turned on *cough* maybe she goes on character ai to try to make her miss him less and she’s just super horny- he sees her watching edits of him and it’s just super smutty?
A/n: Also this is my first time requesting! I sent this to a couple of my favorite fanfic authors bc I didn’t know who would respond, I love your work pls keep it up!!
p e r f e c t i o n
fandom- Harry Potter
pairing(s)- theodore nott
a/n: thelloo my darling, i am so sorry it took so long. i couldn't choose which character to do, so both are uploaded, one is the copy paste of the other except their names [ofcourse] so there isn't much difference, tysmm for requesting and i hope you're happy with how this turned out :)
p.s i love you and this literally has me giggling and smiling
requested- yes
currently playing- forever favourite
warnings- this is set in a modern au, here he's a famous actor
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you placed your pen down, a clicking sound was heard as the cap enclosed the nib. you uncross your legs and make way to the couch with your phone on one hand, ready to take a well deserved break.
you opened TikTok, the symbol animatedly popping up as her for you page loaded. there was something so addictive about it, not that of the app, but how the edits and controversies of your boyfriend pulled you in for hours.
the thing was, the both of you had an argument and you're missing him more than usual. you long for him to grab your thighs, the neck kisses, his fingers running down you as if to sculpt you.
from POVs to edits to just scenes of him had you captivated. just the thoughts of him doing what they claimed. you found yourself rewatching an edit of his thighs. for some reason they turned you on so much. his walk, his arms, the way he moved, how could he do it all so seductively.
was it getting hot in here?
you instinctively started unbuttoning your shirt and removed your shorts, leaving you in a pretty set. you were home alone anyway, who would be bothered? but god didn't he love that set. you rested on your stomach as you encountered an audio, a one with Theodore Nott fucking you. you could feel yourself practically melt with his voice draining all thought and reason on your mind.
his slow footsteps took him to the bedroom which's door was slightly ajar his hand preoccupied with takeout.
fuckfuckfuck
you eyes look up to see the the biggest grin. he though he'd won. he knew you wouldn't go too long without him. it made you upset. but at the same time, his barely buttoned up shirt was loosely hung and his trousers outlined his visibly growing bulge.
leaving the food gently on the desk facing the door, he lifted you up from the bed with his hand under your thighs, placing you on top of his study.
his eyes ran through the pretty blue lace, he always said it looked lovley on her skin. he closed the gap between her, your breats pressed against him.
"I'm sorry my love, but i don't mind fucking you while you're still angry at me. it quite turns me on."
Theo backed you up against the wall, his mouth warm and heavy on yours as your fingers hooked his belt buckle. you were far from angry, you were ready to end him, oh and he knew. he would be dying today, but atleast it would end with his face berried in your pussy.
“sweetheart..” he held his palm out to you, pressing you against the cold wall as his chocolate eyes gazed you in absolute awe.
you pulled Theo by the tie, his hands swiftly picked you up and dropped you ever so gently on the centre of your bed. you push his standing figure on his back roughly as he just has the most blissful expression on his face.
you leaned over Theo and gently placed a feather like kiss on his abdomen, your fingernails gently paving a path down him, reaching towards his abs, the hard muscle were as if god himself had taken the time to sculpt it for you.
you slowly mount him, ghosting above him slightly.
"you have such an annoying face Nott."
that was absolutley untrue. is face was perfection. it was gorgeous and defined and just perfect.
"sit on my annoying face then baby" he murmured. it was soft and kind.
you crawled to the head of the bed, "you’re fuckin perfection." you muttered, pressing a gentle kiss on his jaw as he positioned his hands round your hips, pulling you on top of his face. you settled in, your legs locked on either side of his pretty head. one arm was resting on his chest lightly as the other played with his soft curls.
"fuck" you moaned, his lips spread under you only sucking harder, the sensation making you shudder. you were already dripping and he's just gotten started.
"darling-" he shushed himself off as you moaned, your fingers entangled in his brown hair as he lapped up your juices, quickening his pace.
his tongue lightly ball room danced around your clit as you came and your hands switched to the bedsheet so you don't nearly pulled his hair from his roots. he was memorized with the feeling of your thighs tightening
he continued his pace and as if muscle memory you gripped his hair again,
"fuck-"
you moaned out as he gripped your thighs, acting as if he could swallow you whole.
another orgasm.
and another.
one by one, they all fell into order.
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blanketforcas · 9 months
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🚩Cult and cultlike/toxic behavior: red flags in fandom 🚩
A non-exhaustive list inspired by my 10+ years of experience in fandom, both personal and second-hand. By sharing this, I hope to make other people more aware and able to protect themselves in the future. No fandom space or friend group is worth your mental health.
They claim they have secret information and use that to lure you in
They might either lovebomb you at first or make you (feel like you have to) prove your worth
The leader(s) of the group might not feel super approachable, at least not without fear of saying the wrong thing
They seem to create or point out a divide in fandom you’d never noticed before. Likely this divide isn’t actually there in wider fandom, or the need for it is wholly unnecessary.
They create an us vs them (outsiders) situation. Their group has the most knowledge and expertise, if others critique them it’s simply cause they must’ve heard false rumors. They are always the ones who are “misunderstood”.
Questioning statements from leaders/people with high regard in the group, is not without risk. You can get dogpiled, your intelligence put into question and gaslit about your own words and feelings.
You see discussions happen and get more heated, and at the end of that discussion the person on the receiving end of the things mentioned above ^ starts apologizing profusely and/or believes they are indeed stupid. However, if this person does keep defending their stance, they might get bullied or kicked out of the server/group chat
Too much emphasis on Being Right/having the correct take or theory – it may seem it has a higher priority than empathy and tactful communication
You need to have an opinion (their opinion), because silence equals condoning or agreeing with the “other side”
Everything is a moral issue. When everything is made out to be a high-stakes issue or reflective of everyone as a person, it's easier for the leader(s) to manipulate you.
You find yourself excusing people’s behavior because you agree with their point. The way they bring their argument forward and the tone they use, become subordinate to finding out the truthTM
There is such a thing as The TruthTM in every theory, discussion or analysis
If you don't Get It, it's cause you haven't "worked on yourself enough". Or it's cause you're not trying hard enough, or you haven't done enough reading, or you have blind spots only they can see.
There is a lot of conspiratorial thinking – maybe actors are trying to send us secret messages, maybe there is a Whole Lot You Don’t Know But We Do, Trust Us, maybe this or that person in fandom has tried to attack us and are planning a bigger attack,…
You barely/don’t have fandom friends outside of this group and if you do, you tend to intentionally (whether subconsciously or not) hide your experience from them. They wouldn’t understand the way they talk, they wouldn’t understand the way it works etc
They want to know a lot of your personal information. - might only happen once you get into higher ranks
You might get (more and more) specific “tasks”, it starts becoming a part-time job instead of a hobby/fun space to hang out with friends
Of course, these red flags are not always immediately visible let alone advertised when you join a group chat/discord server/twitter or tumblr bubble. They can also be nonexistent at first and show up later. Here are some general ways to stay vigilant:
Periodically check in with your values, if they might be changing & how you feel about that.
Keep an eye on the way people (and yourself) are being treated. Is it kind? Is it fair? Do you feel on edge all the time when you’re having conversations? Is your body more tense when you’re in this online space or when certain people are around? Be honest with yourself here.
Ask yourself: Is this space becoming my only coping mechanism? Am I spending too much time here? There’s no shame in spending a lot of time on things you enjoy, but do check in with yourself sometimes whether you are actually still having fun and if you are taking things too seriously or parasocialising a lot.
There's a lot of fun to be had in fandom and a lot of good that comes out of it - don't forget that. Keep seeking that. It's why we're here!
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fantasyinallforms · 8 months
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Let's talk about this scene. It's one of the most popular, and the writers and actors knew exactly what they were doing when they filmed it. This is going to be a LONG, long post because I will be breaking down and analyzing looks as well as dialog. Don't worry, I will add in a cut! Let's start with the look on Bilbo's face. Specifically, I've slowed the GIF down so you can get a good look at his face.
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Bilbo stated quite clearly to Gandalf the night before this that he was not afraid of Thorin, but he is not so naive as to think that he will stay in Thorin's good graces after this. Hitched breath, sluggish movement, rapid blinking, and a look of dread on his face. This is a funeral march for whatever future might have been brewing over the course of the journey.
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Thorin, by comparison, is almost slow to comprehend. There is doubt about what he is hearing written all over his features. He shakes his head and says "you" like he expected to turn around and see someone else standing there using Bilbo's voice. What I really want to get at is the conversation right after. Because it's always struck me that Thorin and Bilbo are not having the same conversation with each other.
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"I took it as my fourteenth share," followed immediately by "You would steal from me?"
Now, it's, of course, important to note that Thorin is at peak dragon sickness at the moment and not in his right mind. That said, Bilbo stealing something from him was truly the last thing he could have possibly imagined happening. He suspected his kin less than a day ago but never Bilbo. I've said this in a previous deep dive, but the way that the dragon sickness reconciled Thorin's love for Bilbo and the gold was to place them in the same category. You don't expect what is entirely yours to be capable of theft. We're going to skip ahead slightly in the next GIF.
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Ok, so this is where we start to see the conversation diverge. Bilbo says, "Steal from you? No, no. I'm a burglar, but I like to think I'm an honest one." Clearly trying to articulate to Thorin and the entire company that he didn't do this as a betrayal or out of greed. Thorin's response is chilling and very telling.
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In the first GIF, I have no subtitles because I want you to look at his face, not what he's saying. This is the laughter and smile of a madman who just had the last thread tethering him from true madness cut. He descends very quickly from here.
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Now, "You have no claim over me" is a very strong statement. In his mind, the gold is his and bound to him in every way. Bilbo, after this, is desperate. His words are desperate, and his expression is desperate. But what's more heartbreaking is the look in Thorn's eyes. Like the real Thorin is trapped behind those pretty blues, helpless to do anything.
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Then, finally, after all of this, we have the full snap. The final break.
"Throw him from the ramparts."
This single line gives us probably the most heartbreaking look in the entire movie. To me, even more so than Thorin's death. This is the true "end" the final break. Bilbo's head was bent low. He was willing to take the vitriol the hate. He understood where it was coming from and was prepared for it. But those 5 words ended everything. Thorin is gone, and Bilbo knows that now.
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We haven't seen true fear in Bilbo. Not once. The closest we got was when he was about to charge an orc but even that was not fear alone. There was determination and resolve that colored his expression.
That last hollow look in Bilbo's eyes is properly terrified yet if I had to name this GIF I wouldn't name it terror I would name it
Loss.
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buckttommy · 5 days
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i don't think i really understand pr and what actors should and shouldn't say. why is what oliver's saying so wild?
Hi, it's okay. I'll walk you through it. The tl;dr version is written in bold.
So. PR, or, Public Relations, is the dynamic between the general public (us) and any entity that has interests to protect (in this case, that would be the network + 911). PR teams are designed to ensure the relationship between the public and [their entity] is as harmonious as possible. Happy relationship, happy consumer, happy company.
Because keeping the peace is the intention of good pr, pleasant ambiguity is the name of the game. People can speculate, and people can guess, but no one should ever be able to look back at your words and claim that you've given a definitive answer on anything—good or bad—because definitive statements can harm the entity's bottom line, whatever that may be.
Oliver is very good at keeping the peace between the network and the public. We know this because we have seen evidence supporting this fact for years. He always says a little bit of what everyone wants to hear—he'll keep things vague (plausible deniability) for the sake of the network, while also giving nods of support and encouragement to the fandom without promising anything. You know how he's talked about being cautious and aware of what he's saying in interviews because he knows the impact it could have? Okay, well, aside from wanting to avoid "queerbaiting" allegations, this is part of the reason. PR is a very delicate game and he plays it very well.
Or at least he did.
Right now, Oliver is using binoculars to identify the line, making sure the line is exactly where he left it, and then taking a giant wrecking ball to it. Because now, Oliver is saying things that should absolutely not be said in interviews, or to anyone in the general public, at all. Now, he's elevating the conversation from pure speculation, to actively confirming and placing the blame at people's feet for things that have gone on behind the scenes.
Saying that Buck's Queer storyline was floated years ago? Huge no-no. Why? You were on tumblr yesterday. You can see why. People were angry, and people were hurt, but most importantly, people started to ask questions. We started to look at past arcs, past moments in Buck and in Buck and Eddie's relationship (because, whether you like it or not, Buck's queerness is and always has been tangentially linked to the existence of Buddie) to try and pinpoint when/how his queer arc could have launched. Now. Most of us have been here for years, so we can easily look back at the show and see where it's pretty damn obvious how Buck's Queer arc could have launched, depending on the arc(s), the characters at the time, things that were going on outside of the show (re: Oliver liking Buddie edits before/after the shooting), etc.
But we're not the only ones who are reading these interviews. Other people—casual fans, new fans, people who don't give a damn at all and are just clicking around on the internet—are going to look at these interviews, they're going to look at the things Oliver is saying, and they're going to have the same questions that we had. When could this have happened? And, more importantly, why didn't it? To keep it simple: everyone is going to start looking a little closer at the man behind the curtain, and the network does not want that.
Now, sure, it could be argued that, "hey, 911 isn't with FOX anymore, so maybe Oliver is allowed to say these things." But that's not really how it works. Sure, he might have a bit more leeway (as in, a microscopic, so-small-it-might-as-well-be-insignificant amount of leeway) to say whatever it is he wants, but this isn't the first time a major transfer/acquisition has occurred, and there are safeguards in place (such as NDA's—Non-Disclosure Agreements—which often do not expire for years post-acquisition, depending on the entity they're protecting) to prevent him from harming FOX's bottom line. So, that reasoning rings hollow. Especially because, now, it's not just FOX he's pulling into the fray either.
In the article that dropped today, he openly acknowledges this thing between Buck and Eddie in Season 7. And at this point, we're well into ABC's era. So the fact that he's saying, "I went to Tim and asked if there's something I can play with when Eddie says he's going on a date"—that's odd behavior from him. Not necessarily bad, just odd. And after years of toeing the line, the question that has to be asked now is why? And, more importantly, why now?
Does this mean that Buddie is going canon? Not necessarily (and, before anyone freaks out, I'm not saying it's not going canon either; I'm just saying this isn't an indication). But The Buddie Problem, at least, in the way Oliver is addressing it, is something the Higher Ups would want to keep quiet for as long as possible, for whatever reason. Maybe because they intend to go forward with it. Maybe because they don't. But the fact that he's cracking the shades open and letting light through is deeply fascinating.
But, despite all this, it's important, also, to realize that, even with demolishing the good PR line he's always walked so carefully, Oliver still isn't promising us anything. He's still treading carefully regarding how we, Buddie shippers, will interpret his words. He's not claiming Buddie canon is a go and it'd be remiss to think that's the implication here when it's not. He's not that stupid, and he's not that cruel. But all of it is very curious.
So that's why a lot of us are looking at each other, and then looking at Oliver, wondering what the hell he's doing. Because he knows better, and we know he knows better. We know he's very good at playing this delicate game but right now, he's making moves that are... intriguing... to say the least. And it's not just him, even though he's the main culprit. 9-1-1's move to ABC—and this entire press junket since 7x4—has been rife with sensitive information being released to the public, starting with Lou's untrained self revealing that it was supposed to be Eddie and Tommy that were going to get together, and circling back around to... literally every single word Oliver has uttered in the past three weeks.
So. It's odd! As you can see. So I'm sitting back, and I'm waiting and seeing because something is happening behind the scenes, and I don't know what it is (and I don't even think it's bad!) but it is still very much happening. So.
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the-cybersmith · 27 days
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So, about this whole "AI" thing...
A response to an ask (for some reason, tumblr won't let me blaze normal responsicles)
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Like the Titan, Prometheus, Man Has Stolen Fire From the Gods. We can now make minds in our own image, elevating crude matter to the level of self-awareness. So... What next?
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The first thing I would like to make clear is that, in some respects, my opinion here is irrelevant. So is yours. So are the opinions of the people reading this.
No matter what we do, no matter what we believe, something remains inviolably clear and true:
BAD ACTORS WILL EXPLOIT GENUINELY USEFUL TECHNOLOGIES TO BENEFIT THEMSELVES
This is an axiom of human behaviour that cannot be escaped. Nuclear power is amongst the most regulated technologies that have ever existed... and right now, rogue states are attacking their neighbours, protected from intervention by the threat of nuclear annihilation.
Nuclear Weapons (their own, and Red China's) are what allows the North Korean government to continue oppressing its population.
Nuclear Weapons enable The Land Of The Bear to invade The Ukraine.
Despite this, nuclear power has otherwise been mostly regulated out of existence. It is cheap, safe, and abundant, yet various laws make it either artificially expensive or outright illegal to heat your home with it, light your rooms, power your transportation, trim your hedges.
Regulations and anti-technology hysteria can prevent ordinary people from benefitting from innovation, but they cannot prevent the worst people in the world from abusing it.
So, whatever worst-case scenario you've imagined? Accept the fact that it's going to happen no matter what you do.
Legions of nanobots reconfiguring us into paperclips, a la Eliezar Yudkowski's bizarrely specific fever dreams? If you think it is possible, accept that it is inevitable.
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Intelligent machines with glowing red eyes malevolently hunting us through a post-apocalyptic wasteland, a la James Cameron/The Wachowskis? If you think it is possible, accept that it is inevitable.
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Lying governments using deepfaked videos to create un-debunkable false-flags and cheaply manufacture consent for wars to further their adrenochrome-harvesting operations? Let's face it, they don't even need AI for that, most people will just take their claims at face value.
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But what if we all agree to stop using it?
Technologies are sometimes lost, yes, but this happens gradually, over the course of decades if not centuries. Civilisations can decline and lose access to technologies, but that's not likely to happen for AI within our lifetimes.
If it works, if it is genuinely useful, it WILL be used.
We have seen this play out time and time again, throughout history.
So, we can either do what we did for nuclear power, and regulate it so heavily that it serves no useful purpose to the Just and the Kind, whilst availing the Corrupt and the Wicked...
Or we can accept Evil shall be done, and try with all our might to counter it with Good.
We can strive to Magnanimous heights of Faustian greatness, using AI to create untold works of beauty, so that Human Grandeur at least rivals Human Depravity.
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In summary:
We have stolen Fire from the Gods. The more noble-minded amongst us might as well do something worthwhile with it.
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nightingaelic · 3 months
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Things that are Now Fallout Canon
(according to the Special LIVE Report from Galaxy News that preceded the Fallout TV series' teaser trailer release on December 2, 2023)
Vault 33, the focus vault of the Fallout television series, is located beneath Santa Monica, California. It's also implied to be very, very expensive to get into.
Bottle and Cappy, the mascots for Nuka-Cola and its theme park, Nuka-World, were about to embark on a seventeen-movie-long series of animated films before the bombs fell.
The sinking of the RMS Titanic happened in Fallout's alternate universe. The news announcer jokes about the world going down like the infamous ship, including the deadly lack of lifeboats.
Camels exist in this universe, too! The news announcer actually fucks this one up, because he says dromedary camels have two humps - dromedary camels have one hump, while Bactrian camels have two. Or maybe we'll get a sound bite from Todd Howard in a few months where he claims the camel breed names are swapped in Fallout, who knows.
Pets were not allowed in the commercially-advertised vaults. The news announcer regrettably informs listeners that they can't bring their cats, dogs, or even fish with them due to logistical concerns and safety hazards, but they are more than welcome to purchase Vault-Tec-branded gravestones and hold pet funerals before they move underground. Hypothetically-speaking, it wouldn't surprise me if people tried to smuggle their animals in, anyway.
Someone stole the Fallout universe's original moon landing flag from the Museum of Technology in Washington, D.C. - another headline report, with no further details. It was in the same exhibit as the Virgo II lunar lander, which stayed put for at least 200 years.
Vault Boy was named "World's Sexiest Man" in 2077 (when the report is being aired) - no word about which publication or organization bestowed this title upon an animated mascot.
Vault-Tec trademarked the thumbs-up emoji in the Fallout universe - which is very much in character for the company, but something about there being emojis in the world at all hit me wrong.
Vault-Tec instituted a "breeder search program" alongside vault placement purchases, and encouraged polyamory to get people to procreate (and buy more vault spots). I'll admit that this one seems plausible but shaky, because by this point in the report the news announcer is losing his mind while stalling for the vault door to open, and he might just be making shit up.
Nuka-Cola ran its own version of the Pizza Hut "BOOK IT!" reading program, called "ZAP IT!" Kids were required to read over 10,000 books to win rewards. If we use picture books for the math, and allow for five minutes to read each book, that's about 833 hours (34 straight days) of reading to get some soda.
Moby-Dick by Herman Melville and the ancient Greek myth of Daedalus and Icarus both exist in the Fallout universe.
Resulting Thoughts
"The ghoul" in the show is possibly named Howard - unsure if that's a first or last name. In the teaser trailer, Walton Goggins (who plays the ghoul) is shown dressed like a Hollywood cowboy on the day of the Great War, riding a horse to try to escape the nuclear bombs that hit Los Angeles with an unidentified child. Meanwhile, the Galaxy News headlines report that a box office hit called "The Man From Deadhorse" is getting a sequel, which is currently filming at California Crest Studios, and the news announcer says the film is "Howard-led." Whether the ghoul is the lead actor, we don't know, but it seems like a solid enough hint at his origins.
I'm glad that the show is going to delve more into the idea of the haves and have-nots, what with vault entrance being both selective and expensive. The most recent games in the series don't talk about this enough, in my opinion.
This isn't specific to the show adaptation, but it's becoming more noticeable to me that the Fallout series is crawling forward in terms of relating to modernity. I'm not sure how to feel about this - for example, I don't really mind if the soundtrack of Fallout 76 features the Beach Boys and other 1960s songs when it used to be strictly limited to 1930s and 40s music. On the other hand, I thought that using a news announcer that sounds more like a modern podcast host than a Transatlantic-accented journalist was an odd choice, and as I said above, I really did not like the idea that pre-war America knows what an emoji is. I'll get over it, but I'm anticipating that there will be some more artistic choices in the adaptation (and future games) that rub me and others the wrong way because they don't fit our definition of what Fallout "is." I'm not saying anything new, people have been arguing about that forever.
Overall, I'm excited. We're probably not getting a new Fallout game until 2030, so I might as well try to enjoy this. I will be keeping my bingo cards handy, though.
Anyway, I transcribed the damn report because I'm very normal. Feel free to use!
Fallout - A Special LIVE Report from Galaxy News
with occasional commentary from yours truly
[An upbeat, strings-led orchestral jingle plays, and black-and-white picture focuses on a spinning, silver globe. The globe is being circled by a vintage toy rocket. The words "GALAXY NEWS" fly in, and are quickly wiped and replaced by script declaring "Vault-Tec Presents..." The picture is circle-wiped and transitions to a high view of a vault entrance, with no visible script or markings to indicate which vault it is. The large, circular vault door is closed, and the access bridge to the door is not connected. A timer counting down from 60 minutes is overlaid in the bottom left corner, just above the Galaxy News globe logo and a signal tower graphic next to the word "LIVE." News headlines scroll along the bottom of the screen, the first of which reads "GALAXY NEWS SIGNS 10-YEAR PARTNERSHIP DEAL WITH VAULT-TEC." The headlines are separated by small lightning bolt graphics. The music continues throughout, and a male news announcer's voice cuts in.]
Good morning! Or, afternoon! Or evening, depending on where in the world you are. If you're just tuning in with us now, you're in for a treat. Welcome to the unveiling of Vault 33, one of the flagship vaults of Vault-Tec's arsenal of vaults.
[The second scrolling headline reads "VAULT-TEC VOTED AMERICAN COMPANY WITH BRIGHTEST FUTURE."]
Galaxy News is here live with an exclusive look at the next generation of apocalypse-proof, purpose-built luxury housing, sponsored by our friends at Vault-Tec. Vault-Tec: Revolutionizing safety for an uncertain future.
[The third scrolling headline reads "ROBCO INTERPLANETARY PROBE PROBES DEEPER INTO SPACE THAN ANY PROBE HAS PROBED BEFORE."]
If you're a regular viewer of our programming, we consider you an astute, engaged citizen, doing your part to stay informed on the latest news impacting this beautiful country of ours, and so it will be no surprise to you that we are on the precipice of a nuclear armageddon. But, fear not, Vault-Tec is building the ultimate shelter-in-place solution for the more doomsday-savvy customer: A veritable ark meticulously designed to weather the geopolitical storm surely headed our way any day now. And for the first time on live broadcast, the fine folks at Vault-Tec will be giving you a tour of their newest product unveiling, from the comfort of your home.
[The announcer takes a break, and the music swells. The vault remains closed, and no activity whatsoever is visible around it. It might as well be a static image. The fourth scrolling headline reads "NUKA-WORLD BREAKS ATTENDANCE RECORD FOR FOURTH STRAIGHT YEAR. GALACTIC ZONE GIVEN CREDIT FOR INCREASED NUMBERS." The initial song ends, and a new strings song with a more staccato rhythm begins. The news announcer returns.]
Welcome, once again, to Vault 33, nestled in the coastal west side of sunny Los Angeles County, and minutes from the yet-to-be-destroyed, bustling downtown promenade. Should nuclear annihilation one day come for this quiet beach-side town, you can take comfort in knowing you are safely buried deep, deep below what numerous trade publications once called "one of the best places to live." Right now, ladies and gentlemen, what you're looking at is peace of mind. Billions and billions of dollars and decades of R&D funneled into the high-grade protection engineering that only Vault-Tec can bring you.
[The fifth scrolling headline reads "WE ASKED OUR VIEWERS TO ANSWER A SIMPLE QUESTION: WHAT IS THE GREATEST NATION ON EARTH AND WHY IS IT AMERICA? HEAR THE RESULTS TONIGHT AT 10PM EST." At this point, the news announcer starts to sound less formal and more excited.]
Aren't we a bunch of lucky ducks! Vault-Tec has tapped us into their closed loop security feed to bring you a sneak peek behind a vault entrance airlock. That large, fortified steel blast door you see there is the only thing standing between you and the rads.
[The sixth scrolling headline reads "UNITED STATES AGAIN ACCUSED OF ATMOSPHERIC COUNTER-ESPIONAGE BY THE REDS."]
Very soon - very soon, I'm told - Arnold? Are we - yeah - and we're very soon, and we're very soon. Very, very soon, I'm told, that gear door will open, and Galaxy News will be on the ground to give you all a walking tour of the facilities! Including the accommodations one might expect in a state-of-the-art, modern residence thanks to a partnership with RobCo Industries and some of your shelf-stable forever favorites like BlamCo and Sugar Bombs! There's nowhere to hide from explosive good taste! Boom!
[The news announcer disappears again, and the strings conclude and are replaced with a meandering clarinet-led number. Several scrolling headlines go by: "U.S. RENEWS DEFENSE CONTRACT WITH WEST TEK, HERALDS VALUE OF POWER ARMOR IN ALL THEATERS OF WAR." "ESPIONAGE THREAT SUBDUED IN DOMESTIC URANIUM MINES." "PRESIDENT DECLARES NUCLEAR STOCKPILE 'SAFE ENOUGH.'" "BULLETIN OF THE ATOMIC SCIENCES SETS DOOMSDAY CLOCK TO HALF A NANOSECOND TO MIDNIGHT." "ATLAS OBSERVATORY CHRISTENS NEW TELESCOPE, RE-COMMITTING TO A NON-VIOLENT PURSUIT OF KNOWLEDGE." The song ends, a new one begins, and the news announcer returns. The vault still hasn't opened, and he's dropped what was left of his professional tone.]
And we are... stalled out. We're still... having technical difficulties. You know, sometimes things go bad and there's just no way you can plan. It's kind of like what's happening with the world right now, there's no way you could've been born into the world and know how you were going to end - know how the world would end. How will the world end, in fire or in ice? Well, it turns out -
[laughter]
It turns out it's gonna be fire...
[The twelfth scrolling headline reads "CHRISTMAS TOY TRENDS: RETAILERS REPORT SHORTAGE OF POWER ARMOR FIGURINES."]
Arnold! What's that? Okay. Yes.
[sound of paper pages being flipped through]
Okay. Arnold just handed me a fun fact. We're gonna do fun facts, fun facts.
[The thirteenth scrolling headline reads "NUKA-COLA QUANTUM GETS FDA APPROVAL, FOUND TO CONTAIN 'HEALTHY AMOUNT OF RADIATION."]
Fun fact about the construction of these massive vaults: They use concrete. Hm. That hardly counts as a fun fact, Arnold. Now is there an update on when the door... the door's gonna be open? Arnold? I'm sorry, is there an update on the door? Is there an update on the crane? Is it a crane problem, or a door problem? Is it a pr- is it a crane problem, or a door problem? Arnold? Arnold! Arnie!
[sigh]
Okay...
[The news announcer gives up, and a song with a lot of muted trumpet comes in to serenade more scrolling headlines. "NO ONE'S BEATING THIS DEADHORSE. 'THE MAN FROM DEADHORSE' TOPS BOX OFFICE. A SEQUEL IS ALREADY IN THE WORKS AT CALIFORNIA CREST STUDIOS." "ATLAS WEATHER EXPERIMENT BELIEVED TO BE THE CAUSE OF UNEXPECTED SNOW FLURRY IN LOS ANGELES." "DEVELOPING: REDS CONTINUES TO DENY EXISTENCE OF STEALTH SUBMARINES, US INTELLIGENCE SUGGESTS OTHERWISE." Woodwinds replace the trumpet, and the news announcer returns, pivoting to an unrehearsed sales pitch for his sponsor.]
If you have the money, please - please, guys - get a Vault-Tec vault. Get in there! Think of it as a life raft, a bit. Our country is the Titanic, and these vaults are the life rafts - right? - attached to the side of it.
[The seventeenth scrolling headline reads "NUKA-COLA MASCOTS 'BOTTLE AND CAPPY' TO APPEAR IN ANIMATED FILM FROM CALIFORNIA CREST STUDIOS. WILL BE THE FIRST IN A SEVENTEEN PICTURE DEAL BETWEEN THE COMPANIES."]
Now, were there enough life rafts on the Titanic? If you remember - no, no there weren't enough, and so many, many people died, and so, it's a nice allegory actually, because they're not going to die in the freezing ocean, which would be - actually, it's a little faster to die by fire than it is by drowning in the cold, so it is kind of an advantage to be dying now, th- rather than on the Titanic, the RMS Titanic.
[The eighteenth scrolling headline reads "SUPPLY LINES FOR RED FORCES BREAKING DOWN." Sort of like this announcer. He pivots again.]
Now - can you call a survivor of a nuclear holocaust a person, anymore? I don't know. Their brain is going to be cottage cheese, and they will be crawling... crawling on the ground, stuffing sand in their mouth, their blind eyes melted out, like the white of an egg, just dripping and dribbling out of their eye sockets.
[The nineteenth scrolling headline reads "VAULT-TEC ANNOUNCES COMPLETION OF VAULT 33 UNDER SANTA MONICA, CA."]
They raise their face towards their... god... and scream, "Nooooo! Whyyyyyy! What did it all mean?" It turns out it didn't mean much if you didn't get a spot in a Vault-Tec vault."
[The twentieth scrolling headline reads "MILITARY UNITS SENT TO QUELL UNREST IN SEVERAL STATES."]
"Now, let's talk about the luxury interiors of Vault-Tec vaults. We have camel leather. You've heard of cow leather. Probably. Camel leather is a great deal softer, isn't it? It comes from the camel, who keep their water on their backs in a hump. Sometimes two, if they're a dromedary. Now, let's talk about camel leather and why it is more supple, and why it is cooler to the touch, and we can talk about it forever but what you want is luxury, what you need is safety: Where you go is Vault-Tec. That's it.
[I feel like I need to point out that dromedary camels only have one hump, and no camels store water in their humps: It's actually just fat up there that they can live off of while traversing deserts. Regardless, the announcer is gone again. The scrolling headlines remain. "NUKA CORP SPINS OFF ATOMIC RESEARCH ARM INTO SEPARATE CORPORATE ENTITY AFTER SEC APPROV." "SUPER DUPER MART ANNOUNCES RECALL OF BLAMCO MAC & CHEESE FOR TRACE AMOUNTS OF DAIRY." "VAULT-TEC STOCKS SOAR AS US ECONOMY BECOMES FEAR-BASED." "BUREAU OF ALCOHOL, TOBACCO, FIREARMS AND LASERS TAKE DOWN NATIONWIDE WEAPONS SMUGGLING RING." Another woodwind-heavy song starts up, and so does our announcer.]
Um... Arnold?
[throat clearing]
Arnie! Can we- do- do we have a- can we start a clock? Can we - is there, like, anything we can do? I feel like people need something to hold onto, there's a lot of empty air. There's a lot of dead air, here. People need something to hold onto, people are freaking out, and I'm freaking out because I like to have - I like to bring people comfort - uh, in, in this crazy time. There's, there's only a few things you can predict -
[laughter]
In - in the world, and uh, I thought that opening the vault on time would be one of those things.
[The twenty-fifth scrolling headline reads "MILITARY SETS THREAT LEVEL OF POSSIBLE BIOLOGICAL WEAPON ATTACK FROM REDS TO HIGH."]
I was kind of counting on it as a - a thing that would bring some amount of normalcy, some amount of comfort. Something happening the way it's supposed to in a world that feels like it has been turned upside down by evil. But, unfortunately that is not the case. Here we are. Another thing we don't know. Another thing we have to grapple with.
[The twenty-sixth scrolling headline reads "TEDDY FEAR MANUFACTURER SETTLES CLASS ACTION LAWSUIT, DENIES TOY BEAR CAUSES SLEEP PARALYSIS NIGHTMARES IN CHILDREN."]
This particular vault and these technical difficulties that we're having right now have absolutely nothing to do with the product that you will buy when you buy a Vault-Tec vault. Now, Vault-Tec vault living is living the dream, and it's the only way to safety unless you're... the President of the United States, or something like that, and you have a mountain in Colorado to go under and direct the events of the world. Not many of us are that, there's only one of those... uh, and his various and sundry advisors, I'm sure they'll be fine, but you won't! You won't be fine!
[The twenty-seventh scrolling headline reads "WERE TEDDY FEAR BEARS MISUNDERSTOOD? ONE PSYCHOLOGIST THINKS SO."]
If a vault is out of your price range, there are lower-cost alternatives to purchasing a spot with Vault-Tec. They don't sound... good, if you ask me. Anti-radiation pills? Good luck with that. Not sure how anti-radiation pills will hold up against temperatures rivaling the surface of the sun, for example. But maybe that's just me!
[He's gone again. We're 15 minutes into the countdown, and the woodwinds have really started to outdo their own whimsy, at this point. Headlines continue. "TEDDY FEARS SKYROCKET IN POPULARITY AND PRICE DUE TO SCARCITY CAUSED BY RECALL." "VAULT-TEC ANNOUNCES NEWLY AVAILABLE SINGLE VAULT SPACES FOR SALE." "THIS YEAR'S FALLOUT SUIT DESIGN FEATURES ENHANCED PROTECTION, 20% MORE ZIPPERS." The whimsical woodwinds finish up and a bouncy, brassy horn piece takes over. This summons the announcer.]
When you see that vault, it's all gonna be worth it, fellas. It's all gonna be worth it when you see that vault. Now kids, you're probably wondering: Can I bring my pet doggy, or my pet kitty, into the vault? You can't. Unfortunately... it's a hazard in so many different ways. Uh... tch, uh, their hair can get caught in the ventilation system, you'll have endless problems, where do you put their waste? Where do you put... their food? So many, so many problems, so... we have specially-made Vault-Tec gravestones.
[The thirty-first scrolling headline reads "VIRGO II LUNAR LANDER NOW ON DISPLAY AT MUSEUM OF TECHNOLOGY IN WASHINGTON, D.C."]
We have specially-made Vault-Tec pet gravestones for your children to have many funerals for their pets before you go into your Vault-Tec vault. Memorialize your pets now with Vault-Tec mini pet gravestones! Dig a hole in the sand, put the pet in there, and put that gravestone - and it's got a space where you can write the pet's name - right before you go in the vault, no pets in the vault. Not even fish. No, not even fish.
[The thirty-second scrolling headline reads "FLAG FROM VIRGO II LUNAR LANDING STOLEN FROM MUSEUM OF TECHNOLOGY." The news announcer is really getting aggravated.]
What is happening? What is - Arnie! What is - what is happening? Okay - okay! Alright!
[The music and the headlines fill the space again. "NUKA-WORLD TO RAISE TICKET PRICES FOR UPCOMING SEASON, EXPECTING AN 'EXPLOSIVE' YEAR." "GWINNETT ANNOUNCES NEW PALE ALE SO PALE IT'S TRANSPARENT." "HAPPY NATIONAL SOCK HOP DAY!" "VAULT BOY NAMED WORLD'S SEXIEST MAN." The news announcer tries again, attempting to play up the complete inactivity happening onscreen.]
So much is happening here, we've got... the crane, as you can see, it's - it's about to be lowered, and I'm told - and I'm told... the weather. The inclement weather is - keep - I think the weather... there's a pressure cha- it needs to be - yes, of course. The pressure needs to be right to open the vault, or else the differential pressure between underground and overground will cause... a, uh... uh, the furniture to, uh...
[The thirty-seventh scrolling headline reads "VAULT-TEC REGISTERS TRADEMARK ON THE THUMBS UP EMOJI." This one made me physically recoil.]
L- Look... get a Vault-Tec vault. If you can't afford a whole vault for your family, that's fine. Buy time in a timeshare, one of our timeshares. And it's not the kind of timeshare you're going to regret, this is one that's not a scam, because you can look down at your intact body in a Vault-Tec vault and say, "Look at me! I'm whole!"
[The thirty-eighth scrolling headline reads "NUKA-COLA PATRIOTICALLY SALUTES SUCCESS OF NEWEST FLAVOR LAUNCH - NUKA-COLA VICTORY. EXCLUSIVE REDESIGN COMING NEXT YEAR WITH 'A TASTE AS SWEET AS FREEDOM.'"]
Stay whole in a Vault-Tec vault! Keep it together, meaning your corporeal form! Keep it together in a Vault-Tec vault! You'll be skipping around in a workout area, and... check out those barbells! Why not work those biceps while you're down here? What if there's an emergency, and somebody breaches your Vault-Tec vault door? Well, you're gonna want to be in shape to fight off that rageful beast!
[At this point the scrolling headlines loop back to the beginning.]
Now, is it a human? If you kill it, will its soul go to heaven or hell? Don't worry about it! Just get it out, because even its presence in your Vault-Tec vault could kill you and your entire family! These people are irradiated. It's not healthy, right? It's like putting your hand on a radiator. Don't do it.
[Music break. That vault still isn't opening. The song ends, and the news announcer clears his throat.]
We don't... have the exact scoop yet, ladies and gentlemen, so Arnie, why don't we put some music on while we wait for the skinny?
[noticeable pause]
I- I- I- I- don't know what song, put on anything, I'm dying up here.
[The next song opens with energetic trumpets that sound like they're charging through a movie theater snack stand. It's followed by a big band track that seems to re-energize the announcer.]
And, if you're just joining us, we're preparing to head inside the latest and greatest product offering from Vault-Tec. Vault 33, a pristine subterranean society purpose-built for America's best and brightest to wait out the nuclear fallout. There's no telling what will remain once this global conflict reaches its inevitable conclusion: That's why it's important for patriots like you to purchase a guaranteed spot in America's future. It's up to you to keep our golden society going, propagating forth until we have the ranks to repopulate the world outside.
"What if I don't have a partner or family right now?" you may be asking. "Don't give up on love so soon!" I say. Where better to meet eligible partners than in a cherry-picked community of like-minded individuals? If you find you need a bit more assistance, Vault-Tec has breeder search programs to help you find the one, or the two, or the three, four, five! Vault-Tec is a very open society, so go ahead and purchase that single vault space, and that single may become a double before you know it! And what better place to find someone to love, than safe underground?
Please stay tuned as we prepare to bring the crew, and the world at large, inside our Vault-Tec facility.
"But what if I don't have the money for a vault right now?" you may be thinking. You should never let not having the funds today stop you from reaching your dreams. You can always pay tomorrow, into perpetuity. Vault-Tec is reportedly constructing financial packages that allow for customers to continue payments on select economy vaults, in the event of total societal extinction. So don't worry, purchase away! Vault-Tec upholds traditional American values, and they believe no one should be excluded from the pursuit of life, liberty, and debt.
[Music break, wherein the song concludes and switches to something more pensive and staccato.]
A- Alright? Yes? Arnold is telling me - yes? We are moments away! Moments away - from having some kind of movement here. I'll believe that when I see it. Sorry Arnie, but your credibility with me could not be any lower at this point.
Let's talk about the amenities in these concrete miracles. Radiation King will be providing television sets, modern kitchen appliances.
[throat clearing]
The sofas will be... I'm sorry, do we know who makes the sofas? I'm sorry, do we - do we know who makes the sofas? Do we know who makes the sofas? Arnold, do we know who makes the sofas?
[Arnold does not reply. The announcer is miffed.]
What else is new. Yeah.
[Dejection turns to anger immediately.]
If you could please just give me something? If you could please just give me something to update? I'm sitting here with nothing! I'm sitting here... with nothing! This isn't my job! I'm a journalist! I report things, I don't... vamp! Is there even a - is, is there a clue? Is there, do the crane people - have the crane people chimed in? Have the door people chimed in? Is it all one person?
[Arnold presumably says some inaudible form of "I don't know." This does not please the news announcer.]
Well maybe con- maybe connect yourself to them. You should get yourself a radio. Get yourself a radio, Arnold. That's your job, to communicate with me the facts about what's going on, and it's my job to communicate to the people who are watching - we're trying to save their lives - you know, and this isn't advertising for me. This is a product I believe in!
Arnold, what do you do? What skills do you - are you somebody's son? Are you - are you somebody's kid, or something?
[Arnold can finally be heard, somewhat garbled from distance or technology: "My uncle is, uh, is the general manager of Galaxy News, your employer." The news announcer considers this.]
Your uncle is the manager of Galaxy New - mmm. Well, that explains how you got this internship. I'm sorry for everything I said, but... you can understand my frustration, here.
[The music concludes, but the announcer keeps going.]
The, uh, vault foreman is out here, and he is, uh, uh, doing hand signals. Ooh, yes, it's going to be a while, let's play some music for the people, Arnie.
[A new song starts. We're nearly 30 minutes into the countdown before the song switches over and the news announcer starts up again.]
All right folks, we have an update! They've got eyes on the gatekeeper out walking the grounds. It appears he was attempting to retrace his steps after misplacing the key and his wallet - still no word on the key itself, please stand by for more on the wallet, as this story continues to unfold.
Still on standby as we wait for the situation in the vault to resolve, but folks, there is plenty to get the American public up to speed on in the meantime. World news stories! Breaking, breaking news from the international desk. Peace negotiations between America and her adversaries crumbled in Anchorage, Alaska, this past weekend, a city recently liberated from foreign occupation, leading experts to believe nuclear war is indeed on the horizon. One more reason, America, to tune into the presentation Vault-Tec has for us today. Preparation, resilience, and smart spending are the only way our precious republic makes it through that long, dark night.
[This revelation approximates the date of the broadcast, which is happening not long after the Battle of Anchorage. The clash in Alaska officially ended on January 10, 2077: This news bulletin proves that attempted peace negotiations followed, then failed.]
Going the way of the dinosaurs has never felt this fun! If only the dinosaurs had Vault-Tec technology. Now, the dinosaurs died because... a meteor came from space, right? They had nothing to do with it. We have everything to do with our own demise. It's almost like… people are a virus that is destroying the Earth, we're a planet-killing virus. And people do say, "Oh, well, you know, well, the cockroaches... will outlive us and the the aardvarks or whatever will outlive us." Well, they won't. They're going to die too, because this is the real deal, guys. This is the end. So if you're not underground, I don't know what you're doing.
I wonder how we'll evolve. Will we develop a different kind of skin, some kind of leathery, plastic skin to fight off the nuclear fire? Who knows, but the only way to find out is to purchase a Vault-Tec vault, or a space in one of our timeshares.
[Music break again. It's a rather lively waltz.]
For those gathered around their Radiation King TV sets today, thank you for your patience. Rome wasn't built in a day!
[laughter]
Very soon you will witness… one of the greatest modern advances since the Virgo II moon landing - you won't want to miss this, the future of you and your future children depends on it.
[Exasperation sets in.]
Honestly, who wrote this copy?
[Arnold presumably raises his hand.]
You did, Arnold? Well, that's not surprising. It leaves… yes, well, it leaves a lot to be desired. They couldn't hire a professional writer? You look like you're 15 years old.
[Arnold inaudibly corrects him.]
You're 23? Yeah, well, 23-year-olds look like they're 15 now, still too young. What could you know about the - what could you possibly know about the written word, Arnold? Goddamn it. What could you - what do you know about writing and oratory? Nothing, I'll answer y- for you, nothing. The lack of professionalism - myself not included - disgusts me. The lack of professionalism disgusts me, Arnold!
Speaking of nuclear fire, you should see the muffin tray they left out for me. People want a blueberry mu- you want a muffin, okay? A muffin. Not a little squirt of dough, with a little powdered su- give me a muffin, give me a real thing, okay? Give me some snacks! You're going to give me some coffee? Good. I need a snack, to balance it. I'm not the only person in the world who needs a little bit of fat in their stomach when they eat a... big haul of caffeine.
[throat clearing]
Stand by as we wait for the situation in the vault to resolve.
[The music does some flourishes, then finishes.]
Ladies and gentlemen, it's official: We're experiencing some technical difficulties. And before we can open the vault - Vault 33, our flagship vault, full of the, uh, finest luxury items available to mankind, a- as of now - maybe we could put something on to keep people company while we figure out the technical difficulties. Sorry, these difficulties of course have nothing to do with Vault-Tec's vault tech. In- in- indeed…
Look, I need to have a whole cigarette right now. Just put on the song. Where are my smokes?
[The music starts up again while the announcer burns through a cigarette at the speed of a Corvega.]
Well, well, well! Here we are again! Ladies and gentlemen, we're dealing with a hiccup. Now, hiccups... might seem like a momentary stoppage, but this is a big hiccup. It's like God is hiccuping.
Vault-Tec is reporting that there's only one gatekeeper and one key on this vault model. The keys for these vaults are one of one, it fits like a glove, but it's - it's - these - these locks are very, very complicated.
God, it's so good to be on the other side of this. I don't think people know. People really don't know what's coming, and that's probably good. If you haven't watched… if you haven't watched the news up to this point, don't pick it up. Don't… just try and stay ignorant, uh, really don't find out what's going to happen because… it's bad, um, it's over.
[laughter]
The Earth is a slaughterhouse, and we are cattle!
[laughter]
We- we'll go back into, uh, a society resembling Bronze Age Mesopotamia. That's where we're going. It's not fun. Um... disease is… really prominent, um… we don't treat women well - let's just face it, it's - they - we don't treat them well now, but back then… oof. Rough. Rough treatment of women. You think we're racist now?
It's going to get bad. Where you want to be is underground. Vault-Tec vaults.
[A really tinny muted trumpet rises to its occasion as he disappears again for a bit.]
You know what else is great about Vault-Tec vaults? The air purification system. Let's talk about air. You need air to breathe, I need air to breathe, we need air to breathe. Vault-Tec's got it in spades! We've got oxygen candles straight from our finest nuclear submarines that you can burn, that turn nitrogen and carbon dioxide into oxygen molecules. Perfectly breathable, perfectly safe for your children, and your children's children, and your children's children's children in case we're there for three sweaty generations of sweaty living underground! In a fresh vault!
In fact, we put a family in a vault for 10 years and let them out just to see how it would go… and here they are now! "We loved it, uh… We loved it! That was great!" Uh… that's - I'm making it up! I'm making that up. I am imagining what could happen if I had more information about the vaults, but I don't have that information, so I'm making it up! Ha! Vault-Tec vaults, yes. Say yes to the tech!
[The music saves us for a bit.]
Unfortunately, we are back, the vault hasn't opened, and we have had absolutely no movement towards the vault opening, so! Hope you enjoyed that music. I know I was tapping my feet. Let's get back into it, where are we?
The US government has been quietly testing T-60 power armor suits as part of their long-standing defense contract with West Tek, following up the T-45 and T-51 efforts in the ongoing war with the People's Liberation Army.
[hisses through teeth]
How about that? How about that. The Man from Deadhorse gallops to a fast start at the box office! The Howard-led western is said to be the next smash for California Crest Studios.
[So the ghoul's name is probably Howard Something, or Something Howard. Interesting, but the announcer doesn't care and decides to throw another tantrum.]
Am I crazy or is this taking forever? I don't think I'm crazy, but I feel crazy! In fact, I might be the only person involved in this whole production who hasn't lost his mind! I'm looking at you, Arnie, I'm looking at you!
[Looking at Arnie yields nothing, again.]
"You don't know what to do, you don't know what to do." You idiot! I can't even get the word- I can't even get the information from you. Worthless!
[grunt of rage]
It's just me and Arnie here, I'm in hell, he's sitting there smiling at me, I'm in absolute hell!
Do you have a spot, Arnie? Do you have a spot in a vault? Oh! You do! What vault is that?
[long pause]
Oh, that's the one I'm in. Oh. Dear God.
[deep breath]
I guess we should get to know each other.
Ladies and gentlemen, we don't even know what's wrong here… but I can assure you that what isn't wrong is Vault-Tec technology, this has nothing to do with Vault-Tec's patented lock technology and everything to do with stupid people and human error. If you're this inefficient at work, what is home li- do - how do you wipe yourself?
[Uncalled-for, news announcer man.]
Ladies and gentlemen, please enjoy this music while we figure out what's going on.
[Musical break number who knows. Just over 11 minutes remain on the countdown.]
In other sponsored news, Nuka-Cola is celebrating the success of one of their newest flavor launches, Nuka-Cola Victory, with an exclusive redesign release later next year. Students that read over 10,000 books can be part of the ZAP IT! Program, rewarding literacy with sugar!
[deep breath]
I don't like Nuka-Cola. Personally... I don't like Nuka-Cola. Too sweet. I don't drink it. But it's popular, I have stocks in it, I invest - I invest in it. I don't drink it. It's the way the world is. Just because it's popular, doesn't mean it's good, just because it's good, doesn't mean it's popular. A can of Nuka-Cola, what is that, it's energy slowed down, right? It's the energy of the universe slowed down, right? What are we, what am I? We are energy slowed down into the form of a human being. All that's about to stop.
[laughter]
All that's about to stop! All that's about to go away! Maybe there's life on other planets. Maybe there's not. Are they going to come save us, no! If I were on another planet, and I came here, I would have an endless belly laugh at our folly, I mean, the folly of man! It's funny, there's so much written about the "folly of man." I mean, read Moby-Dick. Read… uh… what di- what happened with the - the wax wings, the wax wing guy? Wax wing man, Mr. Wax Wings, Daedalus. What's his name?
[Arnold hazards a guess we can hear: "Shakespeare?"]
Arnold, Shakespeare? Arnold, Arnold, good god… Shakespeare? Where did you go - you went to one of these hippie schools...
[Arnold tries again: "I think it was Icarus?" The announcer is ecstatic.]
Icarus! Icarus. Wow! You are good for something. Wow, Arnie!
Now, Icarus, he was close to the sun. In a Vault-Tec vault, you'll be as far from it as possible. You will be up to 50 feet underground, in a Vault-Tec vault, safe and sound in the knowledge that the wax on your wings will not be anywhere close to anything that will make it melt, except our new Vault-Tec oven!
[The horns come in again.]
Where are you f- what's your family situation? Do you have kids or…
[Arnold probably shakes his head.]
No kids? Good for you.
[laughter]
Are you single?
[Arnold: "Yeah."]
Ahh, yeah. I wouldn't recommend going into a vault single. You might want to lock someone down and take you in there - if only to help you fight - and, uh, survive, it's good to have a partner. Yeah… oof!
Anyway, glad I'm safe and secure in my vault! Um… I'm in the tax bracket that kind of... automatically gets a vault, so, sorry everybody. Uh… I'll be, uh, doing this thing called surviving, while you are all burning.
[deep breath]
What's the point of any of this? What's the point of any of this? Nobody - nobody listening to this can afford one of these things. Everybody listening to this is about to turn into an idea!
[laughter]
Instead of a being! But, here we are! Let's whoop it up! Let's whoop it up! It's a big parade… for the end of mankind! It's a big parade! Here's the final celebration, Arnie! Here we are!
Let's stake our claim in a dying planet! Let's plant our flag in a dead rock, and see how we feel. Let's see how we feel after the flag is planted, Arnie.
[a deep sigh]
I don't know how much longer I can do this, man.
[another deep breath]
My voice hurts, I'm thirsty, we're out of water, the muffins they laid out at the top of the day are dry and old, I feel dry and I feel old.
I give up! I give up.
[chuckles]
What's the point of this? I mean, what's the point of anything? I'm... I'm broken.
[Emotion creeps in.]
I'm broken. I'm changed. I am broken and I have changed. I…
[one more deep breath]
Thanks to you, Arnie. Thanks to you, man. Thanks, you're the best, yeah, thanks to you, pal. Thanks to you, buddy boy. You are just awful. You disgust me. Yeah, I'm just - I'm sorry. I'm - I'm just… I'm fried, man. I'm - I'm fried, pal. I'm fried. Dead. Gravestone, dead. Oh yeah, that's, okay.
Oh, god. Where are we in the process of the door opening?
[Arnold: "Yeah, it's over."]
What?
[A record scratch stops the music. Two minutes remain on the countdown.]
What's that? Oh!
[The announcer clears his throat, and the music changes to a triumphant fanfare.]
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm getting word. Ladies and gentlemen... I've gotten word that we are star- we are starting, ladies and gentlemen. It's happening! Here we are! Here we are, we got it, we got it, and now…
N- and now, this afternoon is unlike any other afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. It was the morning, now it's the afternoon - here we go! The crane is loweri- Here we go!
[relieved laughter]
Okay! Really close to the time where I can go, and get out of here! The crane is lowering, it is happening, the tumblers are tumbling! The crane is lowering, the tumblers are tumbling, we are… go! We're going! It's opening! It's opening!
[The static image of the vault has not changed in the slightest bit.]
You try doing this! You try doing this, Arnie! You try filling the time! Next time we'll switch places, Arnie, and you can try it! Oh boy, oh boy, here we go, thank god we're doing it and it's happening. I see motion, I see- I see Vault-Tec… I am convinced! Guys, this is great, it's been great, Arnie? It's been great. Arnie, it's been great. You know, I hope we are in the same vault. I'd like to spend the rest of my life with you, Arnie.
[slightly unhinged laughter]
As long as this happens right now, I am fine with spending the rest of my life with you! As long as the vault opens right now. The fact that nuclear fire could fall from the sky at any moment has made this broadcast that much more important. Thank you, thank you so much for joining us!
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maxphilippa · 4 months
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A lot of the neg claims about II are really just making a problem really big/treating it as , or taking things out of context, so let's talk about some of them, ESPECIALLY because of a certain someone(s) lately. Let me clarify that I know that II's writing ISN'T perfect, but nothing is perfect really, and most of these issues are misinterpretation, the choices of the fandom and/or even AE TRYING to fix the writing of a character because a certain SOMEONE was fired on early stages of the writing of said character.
So.
Let's talk about Inanimate Insanity Invitational, and the usual claims that come with it.
1. Cabby's Writing, Interpretations of Her Relationships, and ableism.
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Cabby is one of the most... "controversial" characters when it comes to talk about III's writing, which it really shouldn't be like that at all, although I get where people are coming from expressing their concerns when it comes to the writing of her. Let me clarify something. Yes, I am aware that Cabby's writing changes A LOT and that it isn't perfect by any means, but I think that what people fail to understand most of the time is that Taylor was the one that started the Cabby-Test Tube storyline as a whole, and at some point as early s3 was being made, Taylor was fired from the team due to. Well, you guys know it. Pretty bad stuff. So of course, they had to figure out what direction they could go with Cabby as a whole, and to giving her character more depth than her just using her files for the game.
Now, it is obvious that they didn't plan from the start to have Cabby as a disabled character, but again, writing isn't always perfect. They had to somehow make things work. And even IF it wasn't planned, you guys have to remember the other factors that came with the writing on general. So of course her writing isn't as consistent as the writing of the other character on s3, but on later episodes it does get more better. I can see why people don't really like her arc, but those factors really matter when criticizing a form of media.
Cabby's writting and her disability isn't bad. Yes, it could've had better ways of execution, but it's not bad.
When it comes to relationships, I have seen someone seeing Cabby's relationship with Test Tube as a canonically sapphic thing because apparently Cabby's VA had that sort of intent, and therefore even claiming that Cabby suffers from lesbophobia(via claiming that she had a crush on Test Tube) and misogyny.
And that's not true. First of all, Cabby's and Test Tube's relationship is pretty much an example of friendships that don't work, and Test Tube pretty much exposed Cabby to the world and made her feel bad about herself for the rest of the episodes. A headcanon doesn't mean that the whole thing changes on canon, it's just that, a headcanon/interpretation, and claiming that what they did to her was lesbophobic is. Pretty weird. Since it is shown that Test Tube hurted Cabby a lot. As well, just because the Voice Actor had an intention, IT DOESN'T mean that the writers had said intention.
When it comes to the claims of misogyny, I still don't quite get why people try to see what isn't there.
The thing is that there isn't a lot of femenine characters on II and such, but Cabby isn't treated like that because "she doesn't do anything for men", she helps everyone on general, she cares about people. But she isn't put as a bad woman because of this. What you guys tend to forget is that. Cabby WAS kind of a prick on early s3. She DID commit mistakes and wasn't a great person, but that doesn't mean that misogyny is there just because for that. Just because people treat a fem character badly/not great BECAUSE OF HER PAST ACTIONS, doesn't mean that there's misogyny. The cast on general didn't like Cabby at all until she "redeemed" herself/changed/was true to herself. So that claim is. Pretty out of nowhere.
Now... with the ableism. I do get where you guys are coming from, but if you look into it deeply, they genuinely did have other intentions. The thing that people usually tend to forget is that the II characters aren't all white and black, they're gray. They do messed up stuff when they don't understand things. What the characters do to Cabby before she becomes more open about her disability is NEVER glorified and they always end up learning about it one way or another. Is it reasonable? Yes, was it ever justified on canon terms? Nope! People can be assholes without knowing that they're assholes and THEN learn! Things like that happen all of the time. Writers don't condone the actions of the characters.
Let's take an example at the scene with Bot and Cabby on episode 14. The main problem here was Bot giving fake information to Cabby, which yes, I agree that was a very bad move to do and you should NEVER do that to a disabled person (especially taking in count that Cabby suffers from a sort of memory disorder), but they didn't have an malicious intent whole doing so at all. Bot was still figuring out themselves and didn't want to be written down by somebody (because. THAT'S WHAT TEST TUBE AND FAN DID.), and Cabby doing the file thing was also easy to take on a bad light, but after Justin's explanation, it makes sense.
Could've it been treated on a better way? Yes. And YET, Bot apologizes for what they did to Cabby and DOES the disability aid themselves for her, and apologizes on EPISODE 15, just a few hours later probably or some days later. And on the same episode, Lifering tells Cabby that she shouldn't be ashamed of using her aids and that she shouldn't feel bad about those. Test Tube RESPECTS Cabby's space once she gets that she was wrong about her too. She knows she messed up too badly.
Later on, on episodes 16 and 17, everyone finally gets Cabby's files and respects them, because they finally saw that she actually needs those and that hey, she changed a lot. They treated her good. Characters can be human and can make mistakes, but they can also get better and learn. Although Cabby's arc is not flawless, it is still good. And all of the issues are easily explained just like that.
2. Bot's creation, and how it's never justified by them.
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One of the main points that some people tend to bring on "III's poor writing" is the fact that Bot was pretty much built based on a parasocial relationship of sorts. However said people dare to say that AE portrays it as something good/thought that it was okay, and never did anything else to show Bot being uncomfortable by it, but this is NOT TRUE.
Ever since Bot found out that they were a replica of someone, they knew it was pretty fucked up coming from Test Tube and Fan. Meanwhile it is not explained the loss these two went through (The Shimmer egg probably does not count, since traces of "Bowbot" have been seen on early-mid s2), we know for a fact that what happened was pretty bad for the two of them. But, Bot never really forgave Test Tube. "What about the chat they have where Test Tube apologizes to them?", Bot is willing to give her another chance for the fact that Test Tube offered to help them to be themselves.
Even then Bot explains on their interview that the main reason they acted poorly towards Cabby, was because they got attached to Test Tube, the "only" person that could've helped them to change at the moment. However, again, III doesn't justify what Test Tube and Fan did. Sure, Bot considers them their parents, but they just created them and even when Bot was discovering themselves, Test Tube was. Still pushing the fem terms on them.
So, Bot is fully aware about their existence being fucked up, but they're just trying to live their life as well. These claims do not make any sense despite it being the easiest part to look into.
3. Invitational's writing. (And how The Bright Lights not being themselves is part of the fandoms fault, but also what happens when you try to expand an character who's arc is over).
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Ah... one of the most... complicated points here. People tend to absolutely want to kill AE over the writing feeling weird or unprofessional on S3, but I think that all of you just kind of forget many factors at hand that came with it.
The reason as to why the most of the main Bright Lights were there IS because of viewer voting. The Bright Lights had their arcs finished on s2, and trying to have an story where something is going on with characters that are pretty much done in their stories is VERY difficult, and should not even happen at all. The only characters that did have something going on were Nickel, Balloon and Yinyang on s2 terms. Even OJ was just not having it.
So of course the viewer voting getting those 3 Bright Lights there kind of made things so much more mid on a building up relationships term. Other characters had a lot going on that needed to be solved, not them. I do think that AE should NEVER let the viewers do anything anymore because that's one of the weakest points of s3: most of the s2 characters. When you try to develop characters who's arc is closed, you kinda pretty much go nowhere with it. But you can't just have them sitting doing nothing till their elimination.
However... it's not bad when you forget those 3 characters (Fan, Paintbrush and Test Tube) and have the remaining s2 guys and the new characters. It isn't bad at all. In fact, their arcs are pretty consistent for the most part (except for Cabby's if we count the start of it), and the arcs of Nickel & Balloon AND Yinyang show some real growth and ARE proof that AE does know how to write characters. As long as they ACTUALLY HAVE something going on for them.
As well, something that people forget a lot when it comes to III's writing, is that it is more lighthearted on comparison to S2. Which I can get to an extent, but then, let's remember this: AE made S3 because they were burnt out from S2's writing.
They wanted to make something more fun, something that was more S1 like, and meanwhile I do get people not liking S3 at all because of this, please do remember that S3 is meant to be more silly. More funny. Less serious stuff. Until the last episodes dropped that is, but it is still it's main intention.
4. ...Transphobic? Allegations/accusations.
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This point makes me feel so SO tired at this point and it's how people say "AE gets the trans characters out just when they came out" and get so SO tired of people missing the point with Bot's design, but also missing the whole Paintbrush thing.
The reason as to why they get eliminated is because they get closure to their arc, and they have to get growth off-screen. On both of Paintbrush's eliminations, they were gone as a way to have closure, because the competition wasn't a healthy place for them, and Paintbrush's growth off screen is subtle, but it is still there. Back on s2 they were scared of saying their identity, but after they got eliminated, they got comfortable enough to the point of having the non binary flag on their shared room with Fan, and are pretty respected by the whole cast afterwards.
On s3, their elimination is pretty much the same, but it's them knowing that they don't have it on themselves to keep competing in the show. They get closure with Mephone4 instead.
When it comes to Bot, I have genuinely seen people complain about AE getting rid of the "fem traits" because Bot is... nonbinary. But. That's. That's fucking dumb at this point. The pink and the EYELASHES are FROM BOW. Bot's whole arc is about finding themselves and showing their true self to the world, and Justin has confirmed that Bot still DOES like those things, but that they're trying to find themselves! Trying to be their own person! And them getting out was also them getting closure because they finally know who they are, and they know that no matter what, no one can change that for them.
And for the last part of this... it is pretty obvious that s1 and early-mid s2 had quite some poor humor regarding Painty's gender, but this can be explained by two things: 1- They were still quite young when these seasons were made, 2- Taylor was still on the team (and he was the main reason as to why there were slurs on II, please do correct me if I'm wrong), but they ended up getting treated with respect and decency despite all things. Again. It wasn't perfect. But they managed to fix it and make it work.
Now, are those factors worth pointing out? Yes, they are, but are they arguments to try and say that AE is transphobic on actual times? No. They showed growth and tried to fix their mistakes. And meanwhile it isn't flawless, it's still pretty good.
5. Nickel's Writing Is Actually Good, You Guys Are Just Too Convinced In Your Own Headcanons
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Oh boy, now, if you are quite familiar with the plots I usually analyze here, you must know already how strongly I feel about Nickel as a character and his arc with Balloon as a whole. Because everyone gets them so so wrong and misses the whole point of it. You may know this but people complain a lot about Nickel's arc taking "too long" or "being way too rushed", and both of those takes are pretty much wrong. Some also say that Nickel was worthy of a big villain just because, oh, what was his crime? Sucking at communication and trying to protect his alliance from someone he saw as dangerous at the time? That's called being a complicated character. That's literally it. Some even complain about him "not getting what he deserves" but he pretty much does get called out on the series, but also yelling at him and telling him to die won't help.
That's now how it works. Nickel's arc makes sense and it was long because he had to solve a lot about himself and about learning how to be a good, genuine friend. He became soft because he ended up having people (ex: Box) that told him to get his shit together and to stop putting his petty feelings first to focus on the team. Nickel's whole arc is about knowing what you did was wrong, and wanting to become a better person despite all odds. Even if those who you care about might never forgive you. It was necessary for The Grand Slams arc to make sense and to keep on growing.
You guys want a character to get better, but then complain when one character does become a better person, a more genuine version of themselves. And no, Nickel's actions were never justified by the show or by himself, although he did excuse his actions with fear at some point, but even then, he fully recognizes that his actions were terrible and understands if Balloon won't forgive him.
Just because you hate a character it doesn't mean you can just mischaracterize them and or forget the whole point of their arc. Nickel's arc alongside Balloon's MAKES sense and it's pretty much the best arc on s3 all factors considered.
6. Is Invitational a bad season overall?
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It isn't a bad season. Yes, I keep repeating myself, it is not perfect, but that doesn't mean that it's a bad season. It doesn't stand up to the point where s2 is, but that's the goal, it's meant to be a season made for fun and to chill, and meanwhile I can agree that there are things that can be better or could've been executed on different ways, and it got way better on later episodes due to better structure.
I can get people not liking s3 because of it's flaws but it's not the WORST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED AND A MOCKERY, it's genuinely just something made for fun. And people tend to forget that.
There is not a media that is perfect. Inanimate Insanity isn't by any means.
But man. Isn't it a good show anyway? Isn't it a show that made you feel for the stories and it's characters? Isn't it imperfectly perfect on it's own way? Isn't it made with care and love? Isn't the fact that it has flaws makes it feel more genuine?
I personally think it is. But that's just me.
Thank you for reading.
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Note
You're saying that zutara wasn't supported by the writers and shouldn't have been an endgame. That's a lie! and you can verify this, for example, by reading this post. Zutara has a huge support of writers and actors, she was supposed to become a canon! We were just robbed.
https://www.tumblr.com/crienselt/744143410729041920?source=share
I can show you lots of videos of Grey Delisle saying Azula and Zuko are totally fucking (including one she recorded for my birthday), and there's an infamous clip of Bryke proposing Azula and "The Blue Spirit" as a potential ship in a pannel. Somehow I don't think you'll take that as meaning my OTP is canon and was just robbed of it's endgame at the last second - but apparently tumblr posts are solid proof, therefore my argument is perfect and all you Zutara fans are now gonna have to accept that you ship Katara with a guy that canonically (by the standards YOU GUYS are trying to set at least) loves incest even more than Jaime and Cersei Lannister did. And oh, would you look at that! During one of the times Grey mentioned Zucest, Dante said "The Fire Nation are a bit like the Lannisters." See the links if you don't believe me. WHERE'S YOUR GOD NOW?
The creators/showrunners, writers, and lead writer have all said a billion times "Kataang was always the heart of the show and by the time the first episode aired we were set on it being endgame. Some people in the crew liked BOTH Kataang and Zutara, but Zutara was NEVER seriously considered as a real possibility for endgame or even temporary romance. The only love triangle ever considered was Aang, Katara and MALE Toph."
It doesn't matter how many interviews yall fake, how many clips you take out of context, how many deleted scenes you claim existed without a shred of proof to back it up, how many times you go "but this actor whose job is ACTING not WRITTING says he likes Zutara" or "This writer that wrote tons of Kataang episodes said the word Zutara once when writting a scene between Zuko and Katara" - your ship is still fanon. That's not a dig at you or saying it's bad, it's just a fucking fact.
Write some fanfic if you like it so much, but don't turn the production of the series itself into your fanfic just so you can lie to yourself about how there was ever any chance of you getting what you wanted in the actual canon.
And for real, you're gonna try to use the LIVE ACTION as proof? The thing the creators disowned? Netflix's over-glorified cosplay session that everyone keeps saying "It's mid at best" is THE argument you go for? Have some goddamn standards, I'm begging you.
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hotvintagepoll · 7 days
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Propaganda
Toshia Mori (The Bitter Tea of General Yen, Blondie Johnson)—i think Toshia Mori is a great example of someone who clearly had the makings and charisma of a star & who its easy to imagine thriving in a less white supremacist system than 20s and 30s hollywood. she began acting in silent movies in the late 20s, and in 1932 was selected as a "WAMPAS Baby Star" which was an annual promotion of promising up-and-coming young actresses by the Western Association of Motion Picture Advertisers, becoming the first Asian woman to do so. previous baby stars included Clara Bow, Joan Crawford, and Joan Blondell, and another 1932 honoree was Ginger Rogers. this likely led to her most sizeable role in The Bitter Tea of General Yen (unfortunately a movie with a lot of orientalism going on and white actors in yellowface). she was well received but the studio seemed to lose interest in her career and she largely continued to get bit parts; her last appearance was in a Charlie Chan movie in 1937. she deserved better!!
Veronica Lake (I Married a Witch, Sullivan's Travels)—her look is so iconic they used her as a visual model for jessica rabbit in who framed roger rabbit and a bunch of other femme fatale types in cartoons and live action alike. i didnt think i liked women and then i saw her in sullivans travels and said gee i hope this doesnt awaken anything in me! every role ive seen her in she absolutely oozes an aura of "i know people would ask me to step on them" and her EYES bro every photo ive looked at for this submission its like shes piercing thru time and space to judge me <3
This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
Toshia Mori:
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Veronica Lake:
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Her HAIR, her FIGURE, her VOICE, the way she wore LEATHER AND SANG SONGS FOR NO REASON.
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I don't believe there's a person on earth who can watch Veronica Lake in I Married A Witch and not be struck by how gorgeous she is. She had that youthful wonder about her that almost every Hollywood starlet was trying to achieve. Her hairstyle (peekaboo bangs) became an iconic Hollywood style after she popularized it, and made her signature look all the more suggestive. Also, witches are tumblrs favorite!
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ICONIC hair sweep
The US government literally begged her to change her hairstyle because it was TOO HOT to handle and women who copied it were getting their hair caught in machinery
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Her hairstyle was so iconic and popular that the war department had to come out with a PSA instructing lady ironworkers with ways they could pin their hair up to avoid it getting bound in machinery. [https://veteranlife.com/military-history/veronica-lake/]
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She played a lot of femme fatale roles but my favorite is Sullivan’s Travels opposite Joel McRea, which is a comedy. She became famous for her hair style at the time—she wore it long and parted on one side so it would fall over half her face in a very sexy way. They called it a peek-a-boo I think. You’ve definitely seen Bugs Bunny dressed up like her, so I think if she’s being honored in such a way she’s very cool.
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look at her
she's GORGEOUS in her little witch outfits that she wore for promos and also in the oversized coats and pajamas she wore throughout the movie...she's got RANGE
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My Grandpa supposedly dated her in high school, he drove her to school in his car every day. This is legend in the family.
She has gorgeous hair, has got the smouldering look over the shoulder down PAT, and is just drop-dead gorgeous too!
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Schizophrenic icon, popularized the peekaboo hairdo long before Jessica Rabbit
She’s just so prettyyyyy
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So much hot in such a tiny package. She was no more than 5 feet tall, and some reports claim as small as 4'9"
If you picture a femme fatale in your head, almost certainly Veronica Lake had a hand in shaping the image you think of. She came to embody the look of the noir leading lady as well as the sound and the performance. Certified Noir Baddie.
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llyfrenfys · 5 months
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"Fascism and Welsh Nationalism", or "Stop Fawning over the FWA you cont"
This is inspired by things I've been noticing around Aberystwyth lately while out and about.
Some mfer is putting up Free Welsh Army (FWA) stickers and I have to keep on pulling them down. Why? You ask.
Fascism.
Because of the not so subtle links between the FWA and fascist movements (of which those links are quite frankly underdiscussed) this post is necessary.
So, starting with the stickers:
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This is just one of three identical stickers I've pulled down this last week in Aberystwyth. They appear more to be car stickers than anything else and must have cost a pretty penny to print and/or purchase. They appear to have been bought directly from a website using FWA imagery and slogans - yet does not claim to be the FWA (that I can see, at least). I'm not going to link to it because they don't need any more web traffic. But we will get onto why this is significant in a bit.
Anyway, returning to the stickers - I pulled down the first one off of an electric box on North Road, opposite Vaynor St in late November. I pulled down the second (pictured) also in late November on Penglais Road off the bus stop near the hospital. And in early December I pulled down the third one off of a wall near the Spar at the end of Vaynor Street. Right off the bat we can assume the guy who wasted a lot of money on these stickers lives local to where the stickers I've found so far were. So they're lazy, for one - not venturing much further than their own front door by the looks of it.
Iconography:
I've written about the iconography of the FWA before here but it bears repeating that if fascists approve of your iconography, then that's a sign your movement is already overrun with fascists.
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This is the sticker design which I've been noticing about town. Top to bottom we have "Cymru Rydd/Free Wales" which on its own is fine. No qualms with that. But between the Welsh and English text is a symbol. This one:
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Now, this was the symbol of the Free Wales Army. Note that I say *was* because the FWA doesn't exist any more. Yet various actors have tried to resurrect its very unsuccessful corpse over the years. These stickers seem to belong to a new organisation which is the latest to try and capitalise on the ghost of the FWA. Now, if you're like me, you'll have already noticed this design is, for lack of a better word, a bit dogwhistley. The angled, blocky, swastika-like stylisation of what is supposedly an eagle, the black and white void of any other features and the very fact it *is* an eagle depicted all seem a bit *too* similar to the iconography of the Third Reich, don't you think?
Their design choice is no accident. It is a design which appeals to fascists while also has enough Welsh cultural reference for apologists to hide behind with a plausibly deniable reason for why their eagle Looks Like That. The white eagle is a reference to the 13th C. poem Mab Darogan, in which Myrddin prophesises that "a king shall come with heroism from among the Welsh people" and that "generous men shall be reborn of the lineage of the eagles of Snowdonia". The eagle could have literally been drawn in any way. But it rather specifically was drawn like this. That choice is not accidental.
Now this new organisation which is trying to reanimate the corpse of the FWA (we'll call them EW) has incorporated the FWA symbol into their sticker. An endorsement of the failed so-called 'paramilitary' organisation on their part, to be sure. EW also have included a different style of white eagle on their sticker as well - which is blatantly stolen from Wikipedia (the copyright is expired, but 0/10 artistic effort on their part even so). Also not to nitpick but the eagle on the sticker is grey not white so that's also a fail.
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Artistic criticisms aside, the sticker is loaded with dogwhistley iconography all round. The Celtic knot border isn't necessarily problematic, however, fascists and/or neo-nazis love to slap Celtic knots onto things because they associate Celticity with whiteness. The colour scheme may also be a coincidence, but it does remind me of the fascist symbol which is the 'Flag of Kekistan" which uses the same colour scheme.
Why does this matter and who were the FWA?:
The FWA were a Welsh nationalist (supposedly 'paramilitary') outfit which formed in Lampeter in 1963 and disbanded in 1969 (just 6 years of activity). They took a lot of their cues from the IRA and were effectively fanboys of them. The group was never really considered a threat and mostly consisted of middle-aged men playing paramilitary dress-up. They did claim to be funded by the IRA and that they had dogs trained to carry explosives. Their claims remain unproven.
HOWEVER - and here's where things get sticky. A lot of the issues the FWA were publicly concerned with were and are actually valid issues (e.g. the drowning of Capel Celyn, the Aberfan Disaster etc.). The problem is that fascists or fanboys of fascists love to get their foot in the door by addressing genuine issues. But what happens is that invariably a minoritised group is blamed for the existence of said issue and naturally that leads to discrimination and violence.
The police started to get a bit antsy with the investiture of then-prince Charles as prince of Wales and the possibility of the FWA doing some terrorism. So some of the FWA's leaders were arrested just prior to this. The group officially ended in 1969.
The nationalism advocated for by the FWA was of the 'blood-and-soil' type. Not just your common or garden nationalism (which still has issues but given context is perfectly able to exist in a non-fashy way). And that's why the idolisation of the FWA in years since is sus. It appeals to romanticised nationalist notions of brave men in uniforms helping free Wales - when in reality they did little terrorism and little to actually further the Welsh nationalist cause. In fact, the leadership of the FWA fell apart after they started to disagree on whether their actions were damaging the cause rather than helping it.
Julian Cayo-Evans founded the FWA and ran it with Dennis Coslett and Gethin ap Gruffydd. Gruffydd went on to found other youth nationalist organisations after he left the FWA due to disagreements with its direction - e.g. he founded the Patriotic Front in 1964 which was later outlawed by Plaid Cymru in 1966. It goes without saying names like 'Patriotic Front' are deliberate nods to other, similarly named fascist organisations like National Front.
Legacy and The Present:
FWA's only legacy is the sycophantic fanclub which ressurects the corpse of the FWA every few years to parade it around and relive the 'glory days' of paramilitary cosplay. But aside from functionally being useless, their iconography and politics are still very much under the fash umbrella and that must be resisted at every opportunity (hence why I'm tearing down their stickers - I don't want fascists to feel welcome here). Part of why people may turn a blind eye to the FWA/sympathise is that they may not be aware of the history of the FWA or see the dogwhistles laden in their work and symbols. Some may even just assume without any other context that they're just another Welsh-language preservation group and may even support them without realising the deeper nature of the organisation beyond just preserving the Welsh language.
Which brings me back to EW. I'm going to put the rest of this under a cut, I do encourage reading the rest though and reblogging to get the word out that
It is always morally okay to tear down fascist propaganda
If you see some in your town, don't hesitate to let fash know they aren't welcome here.
EW:
So, onto the latest in a long line of paramilitary wannabes who idolise a long-dead organisation from the 60s.
The EW website seems... sketch. Lots of banners and sections asking to 'donate now' and 'take action' (with money). So right off the bat this looks like a cash-grab.
Secondly, from their own 'About' section they claim that the Welsh Independence movement has "become inundated with authoritarian Marxist entryists who regard Welsh independence as merely a vehicle for furthering their own political agendas". Which is pretty bold stuff coming from an organisation trying to do The Exact Same. There's also a LOT of emphasis on youth involvement and youth nationalism.
There's also a lot of ahistorical claims in the About section too. E.g. on the prophecy of Myrddin "From this legend derives the very name of Cymru’s greatest mountains, with ‘Eryri’ meaning the ‘Seat of the Eagles’ in Cymraeg." - this is contested as there is no one agreed upon etymology of Eryri. To claim that this is The Etymology suggests that they picked this one just because it conveniently fits the version of the mythology they're presenting. They also claim that "Owain ap Gruffydd, would adopt three such eagles as his royal coat of arms" - this is blatantly incorrect as Owain ap Gruffydd lived before the Age of Heraldry and the three eagles are actually later attributed arms.
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In EW's FAQ there's a section on supporting their organisation - with one paragraph saying that you can buy stickers instead "If you aren’t eligible or willing to commit to becoming an activist". Lol at 'if you aren't willing to fully commit to our FWA fanboy club you can put up some stickers instead'. Also the button to buy stickers suggests you pay via paypal "We’ll accept quick payments using PayPal and will have them shipped to you First Class" - which *totally* sounds legit (what do you bet they ask people to pay via 'friends and family instead of through business means?).
And... that's it. There's very little else on their website. It *looks* like they're trying to be a movement, but appear to lack substance (and money, judging from how many different Donate Now buttons are plastered all over the site). A hollow organisation blatantly bending history and mythology to fit their narrative, proudly using symbols designed to appeal to fascists while asking people to trust them with the future of Wales?
Dim diolch.
For further reading on why we should guard against fascism in Welsh language revival and independence, see my other post here.
Reblogs welcome for an antifascist independent Wales.
287 notes · View notes
redbullgirly · 3 months
Note
hi i saw your requests are open!! i was wondering if you could write a lance x indian!famous!fem reader where shes an actress and shes always getting shipped with other indian actors and she decided to hard launch her and lances wedding. fc - janhvi kapoor
thank you 💗
THE WEDDING [LS18 smau]
Lance Stroll x indian!famous!reader
Masterlist
Summary: Y/N Y/L/N is a loved celebrity and her fans often speculate about her dating life, shipping her with other Indian actors and men. But what if, one day, she decides to hard launch her wedding with someone as unexpected as Formula One driver, Lance Stroll?
Warnings: I don't know many things about famous Indian actors, movies or series, and same goes for Indian culture. If you find any errors in this matter, please let me know! :)
Author's Note: Hi Anon, thank you for this request. I have to say it was probably the hardest social media au I have ever done, because I don't know basically anything about Indian movies, celebrities, actors and everything else... I found some random actors, but if some of you know them and I didn't portray them correctly, sorry about that! Though I hope you and everyone else will like it and enjoy it. Also thanks for the face claim, it helped me orient at least a little bit.
yourusername posted on instagram
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liked by shahidkapoor, bellahadid, ishaankhatter, lance_stroll and 2,349,122 others
yourusername time for loveee 🤍🌻👡
view all 3,206 comments
user1 step on me. i beg
user2 Loveee💜🔥
shahidkapoor Always need time for love!💕😁
user3 i'm sensing something here 👀
user4 Wow okay Shahid... are you hinting something??
user5 always time for love you say😏
user6 PLEASE YOU AND Y/N WOULD BE THE PERFECT COUPLE
user7 Guys he's literally happily married. Calm down 🙄
user8 well he can dump her ass and marry y/n instead lol
user9 Y/N & Shahid nation STAND UP he commented😍😍
user10 So elegant so beautiful just looking like a wow 😳
user11 dream girl with dream life
user12 I don't like the Shahid and Y/N shippers in this comment section... c'mmon guys it's not gonna happen you can chill
user13 exactly if she's dating someone then it's obviously ishaankhatter 🤭
user14 giiiirl tagging him is WILD😭 but same tbh, I also think they'd be better couple🤷‍♀️
user15 naaaaah y/n and shahid 4ever
ranveersingh 💜🖤
user16 OMGGG
user17 he's here. I repeat: THE KING ARRIVED🗣🗣🗣
user18 ohhh I kinda see the potential of y/n and him being the IT couple😻
user7 Why the hell do you keep shipping this poor woman with older married dudes? Stop!
user19 jesus user7 let us live we do it just for fun🖕
user20 Idk about you guys but I don't do it just for fun... I live for this😂
user21 yeah same user20
user22 Can we talk about the fact he used the black heart he often uses in his captions plus the purple heart that Y/N just used in her caption?? Like hello? This has to mean something!!
user23 omg right? they're definitely hinting something🤨
user24 Hear me out, I'm Y/N's fan and ship her with multiple actors... but now you're being delusional, it's literally an emoji xd
user23 nah user22 convinced me there has to be something more to it🫡
user24 Perfect💯 wife material
harnaazsandhu_03 Need your makeup tutorial asap!✨🔥
user25 ME TOO PLS
user26 guysss what if she's trying to hint she was on a date or sm??!!!
user27 THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING!!! Sry but the rose filled tub looks like it can fit two 🫢
user28 who do you think it is then?
user29 Pls Shadid Kapoor🫣
user30 I'm actually praying it's Ishaan rn🙏🙏🙏
user23 and i'm a new member of y/n and raveer singh nation... like imagine the matching outfits they'd slay together😩
user31 Unpopular opinion but I see Y/N with Varun dhawan
user33 yeah real unpopular 'cause he just announced he's engaged like two weeks ago girly 💀
user34 youu>>>>>>>>>
user35 Medical science has really reached another level with your plastic operations🥴
user36 stfu
dior 🤩💜
liked by the author
user37 help not liking dior comment being y/n's only interaction under this whole post
user38 Poor her she probably doesn't want to have even more dating rumors going around because of replying to someone's comment...😕
user39 lmao don't make her into some tortured soul, she's probably just too busy XD
user40 your photos are so aesthetic🥰
user41 I WANT HER TO FINALLY DATE SOMEONE SO BAAAD
twitter & messages between Y/N and Lance
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yourusername posted on instagram
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liked by dhramamovie, tigerjackieshroff, lance_stroll, ranveersingh and 5,207,155 others
tagged: vogueindia
yourusername thank you for this amazing photoshoot!🖤☀️
view all 5,908 comments
user1 Absolutely gorgeous 😍
user2 omg guys she used the black heart!!!
user3 No way, that literally has to be a sign🫢
user4 wait im so confused... what is happening?
user5 It's about Ranveer Singh using the black heart emoji in his captions pretty often, commenting it under her last post and now her having it in her own caption
user4 wtf? you ranveer girlies are CRAZY 😭
user5 stfu user4 they're meant to be together🥰🥰
priyankachopra Beautiful girl!❤️🙏
yourusername thx!!
user6 y/n finally replied to someone's comment🫣
user7 Noooo why is it Priyanka Chopra??! Reply to Shahid or someone you're dating😓
user8 guys let her live... this is exactly why she isn't replying to anyone
user9 TWO QUEENS INTERACTING 😻
user10 Absolute Stunner 🖤🖤🖤🖤
vogueindia Our pleasure collaborating with you!🫶
liked by the author
user11 even vogue is Y/N's fan😌
user12 Why are some f1 drivers in this woman's likes???🤨
user13 'cause she's famous lol
user14 Lance and others are always in Y/N's likes, I guess they know each other from some event or maybe they like Indian movies she's been in... idk, the world can be really small XD
user12 It's still kinda suspicious🧐
user13 naaah it really is not
user14 tasteful🌹
therajakumari Icon
user15 we love women supporting women
varundvn Didn't see you for a while and suddenly you're dressed in black... any more surprises coming? 🤔🖤🤍
user16 WHAT DO YOU KNOW VARUN
yourusername hmmm let me think 🤔
user17 I can't believe my eyes... did Y/N just reply to a man in her comments?😨
user18 OMGGGG
user19 no but what does it meeaaaannn?!
user20 This is a good day to be Varun and Y/N shipper🤭
user21 the emojis HELLO
user22 nothing will ever convince me they aren't secretly in love and dating 🥰
user23 Ehm... he literally has a fiancé?
user22 and what? maybe she's just a cover for him and y/n 😉
user24 I wanna be heeer
user25 I wanna be WITH her
voguemagazine 📸📸📸
liked by the author
user26 Bohot sundar 😍 [Very beautiful 😍]
messages between Y/N, Varun Dhawan, Shahid Kapoor, Ranveer Singh and Ishaan Khatter
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yourusername posted on instagram stories
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seen by lance_stroll, ranveersingh, chloestroll, fernandoalo_oficial and 3,209,877 others
lance_stroll replied to your story: Can't wait to see my beautiful bride! ❤️
yourusername ohhh baby i'm so excited and nervous for tomorrow 😭🥰
lance_stroll Me too... but as long as we have each other, it's going to be okay
yourusername ofc lance 🫶
lance_stroll And if you change your mind about going public, just let know, okay sweetheart?
yourusername thank you, but i won't
yourusername it's time for the world to see my man 😘
lance_stroll ❤️
user1 replied to your story: y/nnnn what's happening
user2 replied to your story: I'm praying for you & Shahid rn 🙏
user3 replied to your story: Girlie isn't that the song you once said you want to play at your wedding???🫣
user4 replied to your story: So pretty
user5 replied to your story: 😍
varundvn replied to your story: Let's go! 🔥
yourusername are you srsly trying to hype up rn? 😭
varundvn ... Is it working?
yourusername ...maybe
varundvn Then let's go you're going to smash it in the wedding dress!🔥
yourusername u have no idea how much i'm glad crazy people ship us 'cause we got to meet thx to that 😭
user6 replied to your story: Bf reveal!!!!
user7 replied to your story: pls tell me you're finally going to announce you're dating one of your co-stars
user8 replied to your story: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FALL ASLEEP TODAY KNOWING TOMORROW IS HAPPENING SOMETHING BIG😩
yourusername and lance_stroll posted on instagram
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liked by f1, shahidkapoor, charles_leclerc, kellypiquet and 20,344,109 others
yourusername Y/N & Lance Y/L/N Stroll 🤍💍
view all 34,029 comments
user1 I did NOT expect that
ranveersingh Congratulations to my favourite couple! Memorable day and beautiful ceremony.
liked by the author and lance_stroll
user2 my heart is breaking rn💔
user3 OMG RANVEER WAS THERE?!!
user4 i feel stupid for shipping him w y/n 😃
user5 But can we talk about how sweet it is he attended her wedding???🥺
user6 nooooo my favourite ship
user7 I guess at least they're close enough to go to each other's wedding 🫠
user8 this was definitely not on my 2024 bingo card
fernandoalo_oficial my first indian wedding but definitely not the last 🤪
lance_stroll Already planning on changing us for someone else?
fernandoalo_oficial no, but you can have like a golden wedding in twenty years 😄
yourusername you'll be definitely invited
user9 never in my life did i imagine fernando alonso and y/n y/l/n interacting with each other
user10 RIGHT? it still feels like a fever dream😭
user11 the wedding looks so beautiful!🥹🫶
shahidkapoor Forever & Always
liked by the author and lance_stroll
user12 that was supposed to be your wedding to Y/N dude
user13 MY FAVOURITE SHIP IS IN RUINS
user14 rip shahid and y/n girlies... 💔🥲
user15 Guys, let him be. He is married and so is Y/N now. It's actually sweet that he wishes them well.
user16 QUEEN😻
user17 who's here from f1 fandom ⬇️
user18 me and i can't believe lance stroll pulled some hot famous indian actress
user19 yeah, today has been crazy... 🤠
user20 I just saw one of her films and damn it's actually good xd
user21 how did we know NOTHING about lance being in a relationship???
user22 Idk I was just so shocked when I saw this post lol
user23 the twitter detectives got played this time😭
user24 No but why do I kinda understand why Y/N and Lance fit together perfectly-
user25 WE SEE THE VISION SIS
varundvn We can't send each other funny theories about our secret relationship anymore... 😓
liked by ishaankhatter, shahidkapoor and ranveersing
varundvn Anyway, congratulation so much! I bet I was the best bridesmaid you ever saw! 🫶
liked by the author and lance_stroll
user26 LOL not him being at the wedding as well 😃
user27 Why are all the men she was shipped with coming into these comments dropping hints about being besties and going to the wedding?!
user28 guys they were making fun of us the whole time🙃
user29 THEM SEDING EACH OTHER THEORIES HELP
f1 We hope to see Y/N in the paddock next season!🤩
user30 she will slay
user31 she will eat
user32 If we get Y/N in the paddock, maybe I can get over my favorite ships being turned into dust🫢
user33 I'M DEAD
isahernaez Dreamy wedding 🎀🤍
yourusername dreamy girl right here 😻
user34 i mean... congrats, but what the hell-?!!
user35 🥰🥳
user36 THIS IS MY ROMAN EMPIRE
THE END
Author's Note: Thank you for reading this social media au! I hope you liked it and I'll appreciate likes, comments, reblogs, follows and every other way of support. If you want to send requests for either social media au or normal written fanfiction, don't be shy. Have a great day!
322 notes · View notes
lizzaneia-elizalde · 9 months
Note
ME FIRST!
CAN YOU DO YANDERE JOCK PLEASE!
Yandere! Jock x Honor student! gn! reader
YEY A MOTIVATION TO WRITE!
As my first request... I'm going to put voice claims as like a celebration!
Yan! Jock (Damon): Marshall Lee from Adventure Time (Donald Glover)
Yan! Sugar daddy (Rowan Silas): Howl from Howl's Moving Castle (Christian Bale)
Yan! Butler (Zero): Baizhu from Genshin Impact in JP (Yusa Koji)
Yan! Theater actor (Ignatius): Tamaki from Ouran Highschool Host Club (Vic Mignogna)
Yan! Dragon (Vincent): Lilac Cookie from Cookie Run Kingdom (Behzad Dabu)
Yan! Artist (Arlen): Sal Fischer from Sally Face
((Just the voice claims, the charas involved are not really related to the Yans. BUT FOR THE LIFE OF ME I CAN'T FIND A PERFECT FIT FOR ROWAN GRRRRRRRR also Zero being in Japanese... Well, I actually did a Beware the Villainess voice headcannons before, and I used Baizhu JP as Nine's voice. Since Zero's inspired by him, then... Yeah.))
TW: Blood, gore, violence against a dead body.
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He's a bit... Dumb.
That's what his friends would say when you ask about Damon.
He's dumb, yet sweet, kind, and insanely athletic.
People call him your typical himbo.
Rumors had it that he's completely a mama's boy, someone who doesn't know the difference between their, they're, and there, a man who has just one braincell that ticks around his head like the dvd logo bouncing around the screen and only get used on sports.
Ah yes, sports. The only thing he's extremely smart at.
Other than being street smart, he's body smart also. That's why he's being passed around by sports team in his University and also being gatekept by the clubs.
The baseball club needs a batter? On it. The basketball club had their ace sick? Don't worry, the mvp is here. The badminton team needs a pair for the doubles? Sure, just make sure to let him bring his own racket. Fencing club lacks one person for a complete sparring session? Uh, he hasn't tried fencing yet, but he will still master it immediately.
So because everything in his peanut brain gets squeezed onto sports, his academics isn't really the best...
Yet, his athlete scholarship made him stay afloat in the University. Plus he's the adorable kind of dumb, so everyone loved him.
If you try to tell him that he's a himbo, he would take it as an offense and would yell at you with the biggest pout and puppy dog eyes that he's not a himbo!
Oh, sweet summer child he is.
Everyone liked to watch this big, buff puppy play around with a smile on his face.
But not the Dean of his college. I mean, he's an athlete scholar, that's for sure, but he's still in Education! He needs to do better in his studies if he wants to be a teacher in the future!
And no! Damon cannot just cluelessly tilt his head to the side!
While Damon pouted, the dean called for you.
You're the candidate magna cum laude in your batch. Smart as you are, you buried your nose in books and notes as you studied to become a teacher, but lacked the confidence and charisma to be an effective one.
So the Dean thought this would be the perfect synergy. Damon's personality would rub on you, while your braincells will rub on his.
It was perfect.
And while you stood there with your eyes downcast, Damon's eyes widened as he stared at you.
It was love at first sight.
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"Damon for the last time, it's School Based Management! Not Shoe Base Management! How did you even twist it to that?"
"Hehe, sorry y/n..."
*You sighed and crossed out the number.*
"5/50. How did your score got lower than the last time?! And it's a repeat test too!"
Rowan pouted and fiddled with his fingers. His eyes downcast as he appeared vulnerable.
"I'm sorry y/n.... I will do my best next time..."
*You sighed once more, knowing you can't deny this man.*
"Alright alright. Let's just study again."
You and Damon are in the library now, studying for the upcoming retake that Damon needs to take. But despite being here in the library for two hours, he still hasn't improved at all!
You stood up and glanced around, trying to see more books to use for studying. One preferably understandable for ding dongs like him.
Maybe a children's picture book of CPE 102 was needed for this guy.
You were harsh yet also patient with Damon, something he really likes. If he had a tail right now, it would wag rapidly to the point he'll break a bone in it.
All his thoughts is filled with you and you. The back of his notebook is scribbled with your name and his encased in a heart, crude drawings of you and him holding hands, or a silly children's game where he does a compatibility test using both of your names.
Neverminded that the test always ends up at "enemies" or "strangers", no no no... He won't accept it.
So these tests had large scribble marks all over him as words filled with rage about how the tests are lies are inked there.
And while Damon swung his feet while scribbling your and his future children's (yes, plural) names, he suddenly wondered where you are.
He got off his seat and walked around until he found you.
"Y/n--!"
He stopped dead in his tracks.
He felt shivers run down his spine.
There you where, smiling and bantering with an another man. Amicably talking to each other like you were the best of pals.
Damon recognized him from your class records (don't question why he knew your class records, he swears he's just doing research). Jupiter was his name, oddly enough. He's also a candidate magna cum laude and your study buddy. He's naturally gifted in academics and so does in his looks.
So when Damon saw how your eyes sparkled while talking to that guy...
He felt his façade crack.
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Jupiter ran quickly across the lit yet empty rugby field in his University. Everyone was out for the school day since it was already 10pm.
How did Jupiter end up running away frantically with his clothes sticking on his body due to sweat?
It would be because of a masked man chasing him, power walking towards him with a metal baseball bat in hand. Jupiter can't see his face, but knew he's absolutely huge.
Jupiter ran as quickly as he can, but his body can't keep up. His legs weakened and his knee started to hurt as he heaved quickly. His vision swimming as he tried to run across and away from the man.
He's academic for god's sake! Physical activities are his mortal enemy!
As he cursed his hatred away, Jupiter tripped on a rock and rolled forward. His knee also finally gave up and is now hurting a lot.
Jupiter tried to scream for help, but all he could do is bite his lip as he held his poor knee.
Not until the man got close and clubbed him on that knee, making Jupiter scream in agony.
"AAAAAAAHHHH!!!"
That night, Jupiter's scream echoed throughout the empty rugby field and the sound of a hard object hitting a body. Then,
SQUELCH!
CRACK!
Then silence.
The masked man looked at the bloodied mess and chuckled. His small giggle turning into a full blown laughter as he tried to suppress it.
Damon grabbed a sharpie from his back pocket and scribbled on Jupiter's mangled body. His back, which is still somehow smooth, now contained your nickname and Damon's.
He's doing the compatibility test again.
"Soulmates! Oh my god!" Damon screamed in happiness. "Finally! Oh this is great! I shouldn't have doubted the test!"
Damon danced around Jupiter's body like he's not dead. Then, he kicked Jupiter's body. And kicked it. And kicked it. And kicked it more.
"Tch. You think you can smile at my soulmate like that? Think again buckaroo." Damon whispered, dropping his himbo jock persona.
This man had a sharp, intelligent look in his eyes. One that does not hold innocent curiosity, only a morbid bloodthirst.
This was the real Damon.
"Fuck. This dumb himbo persona is fucking me up. All I could do is put all my frustrations on sports." Damon spat out and kicked Jupiter's body towards his expensive truck. "I'm sick and tired of being labeled like that."
Then, he remembered your face. How he caught you staring at him with fondness as he acted dumb and cute.
He shivered.
"Maybe I'll continue to do this persona. Fuck. If only my parents would leave me be after that incident, then I won't have to do this."
Once Damon placed Jupiter's body on his truck, he started to clean the field with ease.
This wasn't his first kill after all.
He's always been twisted since he's a kid. But was forced to hide it due to his parents finding out he killed his cat with his own two hands with a smile on his face.
A trip to rehab, and he adopted this persona.
He slammed his truck close and drove away, humming and thanking that the University security cameras are broken.
He would kill more if necessary.
He's not afraid to dirty his hands. If ever, he loved it.
He looked at a picture of you and him in his dashboard. The picture was you smiling widely to the camera with a blushing Damon on the side, a test paper raised. It had full marks.
He kissed his finger and placed that finger on your lips.
"My soulmate~"
547 notes · View notes
Text
I don't know who needs to read this, but people who are pro Buck and Tommy having a healthy relationship with good representation on screen, whether it goes the distance or not, are not automatically against Eddie having a coming out arc.
Like guys chill the fuck out.
I would argue that 7x05 had too many storylines and felt rushed. I'd honestly rather have fewer stories an Episode and each is given proper time (so they don't skip over shit like Buck and Eddie talking post basket ball, or Chim and Buck talking post punch, or Bobby and Athena talking post ship disaster etc). They actually showed the Karen and Hen talks after the Eva storylines and that's so important and good.
Tommy isn't getting screen time without a main with him so stop pretending he is. He's a background character who is currently there to prop up other people's storylines. It's unlikely he will ever be a main as they already have 7 of them. Can you think if you've ever seen a Karen or a Ravi or a Lucy or a Taylor storyline that wasn't there to really be about one of the mains? No.
I am literally seeing BuckTommy enjoyers having to fucking preface their posts with the fact they obviously ship buddie too just so they don't get abused. It's genuinely disgusting that people are more fixated on their specific (and I would defo class it as fetishistic at this point with the obsession some people have with buddie) ship that they would actively damage other people's enjoyment of the show.
This accusation that people don't care bout buddie anymore because Tommy has kissed Buck and Tommy is white is fucking insane. This fandom regularly accuses anyone who says good things about Buck or Bobby of being racist. Maybe, and hear me out, people are happy that they are getting some bi representation? People who have been pro buddie since 2x01 are getting sent hate because they are happy that a character has come out, despite never turning against buddie.
It's literally normal to be watching a show and be like "yes, I want characters X & Y to end up together but currently they aren't and that's not an issue for me". It's a fictional show.
I want Eddie to get a coming out story line and I would not be upset if it didn't revolve around Buck because 1. Eddie is his own person, and 2. I KNOW that if it did revolve around Buck, you guys would immidiately say it's worthless because it's not an Eddie story but actually a story about the "white boy". Like you literally cannot have it both ways.
You can't beg for coming out story lines and then say "wait that's the wrong person they're kissing." It's a coming out story line. It's literally a gateway to a whole new world of stories in the show.
Chill out, go outside, maybe try to enjoy the show you claim to love instead of shitting on it, the actors and the other fans
98 notes · View notes
fdelopera · 5 months
Text
Exposing an Antisemitic Conspiracy Theory from TikTok
If I see one more Jew-hating idiot with TikTok brainrot saying shit like, "the Palestinians are descended from the ancient Philistines from the Bible lolol"...
You Jew-haters are exhaustingly stupid. And in this post, I'm going to show you why.
As I said in my post yesterday, there are some really bad actors (both in the conspiracy sense, and in the literal "drama" sense) on TikTok who are trying to erase Jewish history by spreading conspiracy theories that somehow Philistines and Palestinians are "the same".
These idiots are doing this so they can claim that "Jesus was a Palestinian/Philistine."
It gives me a headache even to write something as stupid as that.
No, ya dumb-dumbs. Jesus was not a Philistine. Jesus was a Judaean Jew. He was from Bethlehem. In Judaea.
You know, Judaea. The place where the Jews are from.
It is actually really offensive to a lot of Christians to claim that "Jesus was a Philistine" like this. If you've never read the Bible (and I'm guessing none of these TikTokers have), calling someone a "Philistine" is an insult. In common use, it means an uncultured or crass person.
In Hebrew, the word for Philistine is "Peleshet (Plishtim, plural)". It is related to the Hebrew word, "Polesh". Polesh in Hebrew means "invader".
So by calling Jesus a Philistine, you're calling him an uncultured invader.
And I am here, as a Jew, telling you to stop insulting Jesus like this!
.
Now, saying "Jesus was the same as modern day Palestinians" is also unhistorical.
The region was called Judaea when Jesus was alive. So he was a Judaean Jew.
It would be just as unhistorical to say, "Jesus was a modern-day Israeli".
.
So, why are antisemites spouting this bullshit?
Unfortunately, these Jew-haters think they're "protecting" the Arab Palestinians by spreading conspiracy theories and lies about Jewish history.
They think they're making a "case" for Arab Palestinian indigeneity in Judea by telling these lies.
Because Arabs aren't indigenous to Judea.
And let me tell you, Tumblrinies who went to the Tumblr school of world history are even trying to rewrite Arab history! Some of them have even tried to tell me, "but Canaanites were Arabs lolol!"
Do you want me to show you a map?? No, dumb-dumbs. Canaanites were NOT Arabs. Canaanites are the ancestors of the Jewish People. Not the ancestors of Arabs.
Arabs come from the Arabian Peninsula.
OMG do you guys not even study geography anymore??
These Jew-hating idiots are literally willing to try to rewrite the history of the Arabian Peninsula just so they can fuck with Jewish people. You antisemites are absolutely unhinged!!
.
Okay, deep breath.
.
Here's the other thing. Our educational system is broken. And people don't study history (clearly).
Because if they did study history, they would realize that attaching Jesus to the Philistines doesn't confer ANY indigeneity to the Palestinian people.
(G-d, you conspiracy theory idiots are so dumb!!)
Because, you see, the Philistines were GREEK!!
They weren't indigenous to the Levant AT ALL!!
So in claiming that the Palestinians are the "same as" the Philistines, you have actually WEAKENED the case for Palestinian indigeneity!
And none of this matters!
YES, the Jewish people ARE indigenous to Judea.
And NO the Palestinian Arabs are NOT.
BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER.
IT DOESN'T MATTER THAT ARABS ARE NOT INDIGENOUS TO JUDEA.
BECAUSE THE PALESTINIAN PEOPLE DESERVE HUMAN RIGHTS AND SELF-DETERMINATION NO MATTER WHAT!!!
Do you see what spreading conspiracy theories and lies about Jewish history does? All it does is make you look like FOOLS, and it HURTS the Palestinian people!!!
And YES, these conspiracy theories mainly hurt Jews. But I know y'all don't give a single SHIT about Jews. You've proven to us just how antisemitic you are.
So PLEASE for the LOVE OF G-D, STOP spreading these fucking LIES, BECAUSE THEY HURT PALESTINIANS TOO!!
.
Okay. Deep breath. Some history.
The Philistines were ancient Bronze Age Mycenaeans, aka they were Greeks. The Torah is consistent with this. It records them as being from Crete, which during the Late Bronze Age was under Mycenaean control. They also had some genetic admixture from Southern Italy. We know this both from DNA evidence from their skeletons, and also from their pottery, which looks similar to Mycenaean Bronze Age pottery.
And regardless, Israel and Jerusalem are both in the archeological record, and in Egyptian records, LONG BEFORE the Greek Philistine people appeared in Egyptian records. The ancestors of the Jewish people were there long before the Philistines arrived.
And you would know all this if you STUDY JEWISH HISTORY! Here's my Jewish history masterpost. I recommend that everyone read it.
The Philistines were invaders in Canaan, and they clashed often with the native Canaanites, which are the people that Jewish people are descended from. Jews ARE Canaanites. Read my post here on Jewish origins.
The cultural memory of these clashes is recorded in the story of David and Goliath in the Bible. The Israelite David felled the much larger Philistine Goliath with a slingshot, and then chopped off Goliath's head with his own iron sword.
The Greek Philistines were a small people group living in Judea. The last of the Philistines in Judea were slaughtered in 604 BCE by the army of Babylonian King Nebuchadnezzar II when he besieged Jerusalem. This is the same siege that resulted in the Babylonian Exile of the Jewish people. Nebuchadnezzar dragged many of the Judeans (the Jewish population) as captives to Babylon (modern day Iraq). Then in 586 BCE, Nebuchadnezzar destroyed the First Jewish Temple and dragged many more of the Jews into captivity in Babylon.
In 539 BCE, the Persian King Cyrus the Great defeated the Babylonians in battle, and in 538 BCE, the Persians allowed the Jews to return to Judea. The Jews came back to Jerusalem to build the Second Temple on the site where the First Temple had stood, which they completed in 515 BCE. But when the Jews returned, they found that the Greek Philistine community had been decimated by the Babylonians.
.
So, where did the Philistines come from?
As I stated above, the name "Philistine" is a Greek version of the Hebrew word Peleshet, and the Peleshet were likely the same as the Mycenaean Greek Peleset tribe known to Egypt. The Greek Peleset tribe were part of a people group that are today called the "Sea Peoples."
At the end of the Bronze Age (aka the Late Bronze Age Collapse), the known world was going through a period of terrible drought, famine, and earthquakes. Various people groups from areas that are now part of Italy and Greece, including the Greek Peleset tribe, formed a rough confederation and went around to various cities, sacking and plundering the cities for resources. In 1175 BCE, the Sea Peoples invaded Egypt, and King Ramesses III defeated them in battle. He commemorated their defeat on a wall of his mortuary temple at Medinet Habu.
.
So why is Palestine called Palestine, a name that does derive from the name Philistine?
To find out, you have to fast forward from around 604 BCE (when the Babylonians wiped out the last of the Greek Philistine people) to around 135 CE to get to the next time that the name of the "Philistines" becomes important.
That's a span of around 740 YEARS!
At that point, the Second Temple in Jerusalem had already been destroyed by the Romans in 70 CE. The Romans were doing ethnic cleansing on the Jews in Judaea, after the Jews tried to get Jerusalem back from Roman control in the Bar Kochba revolt (132 - 135 CE).
After the Roman Empire defeated the Jews in Judaea and squashed the Bar Kochba Revolt in 135 CE, the Romans RENAMED the region Syria-Palaestina. It was a vain attempt to remove the Jewish presence in the region. The Romans literally tried to wipe the Jews "off the map."
Guess what, motherfuckers! It didn't work. Jews came back to the region not long after.
The Romans named the region after the GREEK Peleshet/Philistines (who, again, by then were LONG GONE).
So the name "Syria-Palaestina" is basically the Romans trying to erase Jewish identity. Which again, DIDN'T WORK.
WE JEWS ARE STILL HERE.
So tl;dr "Palestine" is NOT the same as the Greek Philistines/Peleshet.
.
The Romans just went through the Hebrew Bible and looked for a name they could call the region that would be painful to the Jewish people. So they named the region after one of the Jewish people's Biblical rivals.
Philistia was also a name that was in use in the Greek world because, again, the Philistines were ancient Greeks.
But there's no actual connection between the region called "Syria-Palaestina" and the Greek people group called the Philistines.
This is why (let's say it all together kids) you need to LEARN JEWISH HISTORY!
.
And here's the worst part of this conspiracy theory.
Again, I know why Jew-haters tell this lie. And by now, so do you.
Jew-haters say this shit in a completely misguided attempt to "protect" the Palestinian people.
But, let's say it all together, the Palestinian people don't need to be backed by LIES in order to defend their human rights and their right to self-determination!
The Palestinian people DESERVE PROTECTION. THEY DESERVE TO HAVE FULL HUMAN RIGHTS.
.
THIS IS NOT A ZERO-SUM GAME, with one "winner" and one "loser."
YOU DON'T NEED TO TELL LIES ABOUT JEWISH HISTORY TO DEFEND THE PALESTINIAN PEOPLE.
Jews and Palestinians are not "pawns" for you Jew-haters to use in your pretend game of war. You're acting like you're in some sort of video game fantasy.
JEWS AND PALESTINIANS ARE NOT YOUR PLAYTHINGS!
.
If you tell lies about Jewish history in a stupid attempt to "defend" the Palestinian people, you're not helping them at all. You're just being an antisemitic bigot steeped in Jew-hatred.
And taken to its extreme, the real conclusion of your antisemitic LIE is actually a really weird, unhinged blasphemy against the Prophet Muhammad!!
.
So if you ACTUALLY want to HELP the Palestinian people, and not just be a Jew-hating bigot, I would recommend that you put your money where your mouth is.
Stop telling easily disprovable LIES about Jewish history, and start donating to organizations and charities that are helping Palestinians. The organizations that I recommend are:
ANERA
Palestine Children's Relief Fund
Doctors Without Borders
Standing Together
205 notes · View notes
urf1lterr · 1 year
Text
lovesick | pedro pascal [2]
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"and on this night and in this light i think im falling, im falling for you."
next chapter: [3] previous chapter: [1] series masterlist
summary: in which a 1975-obsessed film student accidentally falls in love with an older man she can't have.
pairing: actor!pedro x intern!reader
genre: acting world!au, big age-gap!, strangers to friends- maybe lovers?? au | angst, mature, awkward, love- eventually
word count: 6.7k
status: in progress
author's note: this chapter was for fun- i have the 1975 on repeat so i had to lmao. i kinda wanna do a slow burn because i don't want to make anything happen so fast. and pedro was at the oscars a few hours ago so why not post another chapter for him :) not edited.
You hated working weekends.
Something about waking up extremely early on a day that was supposed to be your day off irks you. Why have a scheduled rest day if you're just going to be scheduled to come in? It made zero sense, especially since you were only given a two hour notice before while sleeping.
No pay, clothes, gifts could ever make you happy after being called in at 5am for a 7am shift-
"Venti iced white chocolate mocha with oat milk, vanilla sweet cold foam, caramel drizzle, and light ice as always," Pedro listed as he handed you the coffee.
"Oh my god, I think I love you," you blurted out, staring at the cup in awe.
"That was fast, I see now why you're single," Pedro replied, giving you the side eye. "And soon diabetic."
Rolling your eyes, you take a sip of the coffee before shaking your head. "Not like that, you moron," you scoffed as he glared at you. "I love coffee too much- and who says I'm single."
"Think of it as your reward for waking up to the call," he joked as you just stared at him annoyed. The one time you turn off your do not disturb and this happens. "Your loneliness says otherwise."
"I am not lonely!" you gasp as he shrugs. "I'll have you know I am dating-"
"If you dare say Matty Healy I will personally push you in a bush-," Pedro declares, stopping you as you try to interject. "-and won't help you back up."
Huffing, you cross your arms as he laughs at the sight of your defeat. He knows you too well considering the fact you only met two months ago.
In fact, these two months were probably the best ones you have had all year. Not only did you experience some awesome moments you're sure you'll never get to witness again, but you got along with a lot of special people.
What made things even better was the fact that you got along with your boss because who knows where you would've ended up if Finn was a total douche- which he wasn't. But he did have his moments where he took your kindness for weakness- like asking you to come in for shift on a Saturday.
One thing that definitely advanced would have to be your relationship with Pedro. Nearly best friends is what you two were typically called on a normal day on set by how close you've become.
The nearly part added because nothing could ever come between his relationship with Bella, or Bellie in his own words. And because Jules always made sure to tell the jokesters that she was not giving up her position just yet.
But when it came to work, Pedro was always there for you. Considering he's been in the industry since before you were even born, which he yelled at you once when you joked, he was the best support.
He would even ask you what you were assigned to do and tell you specifically what was wanted without you even asking- even finding ways to physically assist before being caught and sent back to his actual job.
There were also the constant times where he would spam you with iMessage game requests to 8 ball and ignore you after beating him three times in a row, claiming his phone died despite your messages being sent through.
The only thing that made today better was that he was here because who knows how boring the day would have been if you were spent hanging with the technicians who; in fact, did not appreciate the countless times you dropped a mic.
"Why didn't Jules get called in?" you questioned as he turned up the computer brightness you were using. "That girl never wakes up early but I kid you not, she was playing minecraft on her computer when I was leaving."
"I love minecraft," Pedro sighed.
"I do too, but Jules always sends the creepers to my house," you complain. "They always destroy my garden."
"I could only imagine the devastation in your eyes," he dramatically exhales as you nudge him. "But I think it's because you're more...attentive? Not saying that she isn't, but she sure loves to talk about Jersey Shore in between takes."
"She's been binge-watching all the seasons after work."
The conversation ended once he was caught again by one of the producers and lured out of the office you were in. Initially, he searched around the studio and found you to gift the coffee, but he stayed because he did not want to sit on the makeup chair for another round of a drastic look being applied to his face- especially if you weren't there to pester him.
As for you, once clocked in Finn managed to have you scan after emails as a way to apologize for the call in. Apparently, one of his assistants called out so he decided to use you as their replacement since he couldn't find the time to sit down in a cozy office and do so.
But you were totally not complaining.
That only lasted you about two hours before you were finished and terribly bored.
Throwing the empty cup of coffee in the trash, you decided to walk around in hopes of finding something better to do or else you would've fallen asleep on the desk.
You would've if you weren't scared of the thought of a director finding and; consequently, firing you.
Hearing a loud noise, you quickly averted your eyes where your ears were signaling where the noise came from. Lightly jogging behind a curtain, your eyes widened to a sight of a desk on its side and a man hovering over it.
"Joon?!" you exclaim, running over to find him lowly panting, trying to remain his coolness as you began inspecting him to find any injuries.
"I'm fine," he calmly replied, using his dimpled smile as a way to reassure this but you didn't believe him. That was a loud drop.
"Why in the world are you lifting a desk that surely isn't less than 30 pounds?" you glare as he chuckles at the fake anger you poorly tried displaying.
"One of the technicians asked me to bring it out."
"And did you forget that your back would disagree?"
He shuts his mouth for a second, loss for words at your comeback. "I couldn't say no," he shyly replied. "I didn't want to have to pull out my medical forms explaining why I can't lift a table."
Feeling your face sink, you helped him stand straight as he glanced down at the fallen table. "You should have called for help then- everybody would need help for a gigantic table like this."
He only nodded in response, making you feel bad. You felt like you were lecturing him, technically you were, but you didn't want to find out in the future the reason he stopped attending work was because he pulled his back again.
"I'll drag this out," you declare as he tried slapping you hands away from it.
"It's too heavy for you!" he argued.
"Which is why I said drag," you countered back, ignoring his pleas as you somehow managed to lift the table back to its standing positioning.
Walking around it, you bent your back as you began pushing it around the curtain as Joon followed your position, crouching next to you for the extra support.
If it wasn't for the film crew being around the floor, you were sure you would have passed out right then and there. But you couldn't let them know how weak you were.
"And that's how teamwork makes the dream work," you announce, causing Joon to giggle before giving you a high-five as the two of you stand up from your bent posture.
Joon was another person you got along with incredibly well. For one, you guys were the duo out of all the interns. Every job you had that included another person, he was always there.
There was also the many times the two of you, and Jules of course, would carpool together to get home. It turned out Joon was also friends with some of your college classmates so he was always the only person from work who joined you guys for the random nights of cheesy movies and boring games while eating takeout with your other friends.
Despite hanging out for so long, you felt dense when someone called him Namjoon one time, even turning your head around for this Namjoon, completely oblivious to the fact that Joon was connected to Namjoon.
To be fair, he never went by his full name claiming that his nickname sounded more 'chill,' or whatever that meant.
Other than that, you were sure he was your other best friend. Well, after Jules and maybe Pedro. They were probably on the same level if you had to arrange them- not that friends had to ranked.
"Are you ready for this afternoon?" Joon called out as the two of you walked off the stage back to the curtains.
"For what?"
He sent you a surprised look, scaring you because is there something crazy happening that you had to prepare for? "Do you have your phone?"
Patting your back pocket, you shook your head. "I think I left it in my bag. Why? I'm about to cry if you don't tell me," you impatiently whine.
"What kind of fan you are," he simply responds, causing you to widen you eyes.
Immediately jumping on him, you shake his shoulders repeatedly. "What is the 1975 doing?! You must tell me or I swear to the gods I will bust your kneecaps and make you crawl for help."
He bursts out laughing at your threatening begs, trying to calm down your jumps by grabbing your shoulders to hold you. "You're violent."
"And you'll need surgery if you don't hurry it up."
Tapping your shoulder to calm down, you slowly do so. "3 o'clock is when their tickets go on sale for their upcoming tour, one of the dates being in New York City."
You could have sworn you were about to faint if it weren't for Joon pulling out his phone to show you you still had time to mentally prepare for the combat you were about to enter.
That's what ticketmaster was, a war zone.
"How was I not aware of this?!" you cry out, internally panicking about what you were going to do. You can't miss out on this concert, you just had to see these British people in person in order for your life to be complete.
"They did just post the news half an hour ago," he admitted. "Good for you for not being addicted to your phone."
Scowling at him, he quickly closed his mouth as you went over all the things you needed to do to prepare. "Wait, can we go together? None of my guy friends like them."
If you weren't in your own world mentally planning how you were going to beat all these teenage girls online, you would have noticed Pedro walking up to the two to you. But you didn't because your mind couldn't stop thinking about Matty Healy singing 'She's American' because you were indeed American.
"Why does she look deranged?" Pedro questioned, standing a few feet away from you. "Oh no, did Matty Healy die?"
Glaring at him, you ignore his irrelevant comment and face back to Joon. "You and me, my place straight after work. Got it?"
He nods, already in game mode because he knows how bad the two of you need to witness this concert.
Pedro exchanged a crazed look between the two of you, assuming his own ideas as to what you meant. "You're having a party and didn't invite me?" he tried joking to understand the conversation a bit more.
"No time for fooling around, Pedro," you state, grabbing Joon by his arm and making your way back to the office to search for your phone. "We have important business to settle, see you around!"
He watched the way Joon and you walk away hurriedly and wonders if you have a thing for the boy. It would make sense right? Joon was around the same age and he saw you guys work together all the time.
Shaking his head, he walks back to the stage trying to not overthink whatever was flowing in his head. But he couldn't help but question why he was never invited to your place? He instantly rejected that idea, he was twice your age. There's no way that was realistically appropriate.
However, you were friends- so wasn't it hypothetically okay?
No, there was no way he was really debating this. It's completely understandable why he didn't need to be invited over and Joon could.
But how many times did Joon come over?
Stop. His thoughts were confusing him and he needed a distraction. He wasn't going to let another man make him envy of where his friendship stood with you because there is no way he's jealous Joon might take his close friend status.
Because that's who you were to him, a close friend.
After another hour of working with Joon secretly about the tickets while emailing more people who Finn ordered, you two were finally cut for the day.
And luckily you still had two hours before the tickets went on sale.
"I need to grab my coat I left backstage, meet me outside?" Joon asked and you nodded, waving him off as you put on your own coat and bag.
Sprinting out of the office, you didn't expect to fall on the floor by the the person who ran into you. Well, the person fell to the floor while you comfortably landed on top of them, their arms wrapping around you.
"If you missed me that much you should've just texted me sooner to drop by," you heard the culprit chuckle, immediately making you shake their secured hands off your waist to stand.
"That was definitely not the case," you laugh, sticking a hand out to help him get up.
He raises a brow while staring at your hand before taking it, instantly pulling you back down with him. Falling over again, you slowly slip into his arms before finding your balance and giving up on helping him.
"How adorable of you to think you can lift me up," he grins, pulling his own weight up.
"I would love to stay and chat," you start, before looking past him and back again. "But I have something very important to do."
Trying to move around him, he stops you by grabbing your shoulder. "That's why I came to be a generous person and offer you a ride- so you can be home faster and do whatever you needed to do with Josh."
"His name's Joon."
"That's what I said," he ignores you're doubtful glance. "I can take you guys to your apartment."
Thinking it over, it would make it easier and faster to get home and prepare for the sale. If you would've taken a cab and subway it would have been an hour, with him it'll be half that.
"Fine," you spit out and watch as his face lights up. "But I am not owing you anything, you offered."
"Love how two months ago you would've begged the world for me," he placed a hand over his heart. "Oh how comfortable you've gotten with me."
"I don't want to hear it," you shun him, walking past him as he makes a silly face behind your back. "I can feel that!" He immediately stops, surprised you sensed it.
Maybe the two of you gotten a long too well.
"He's gonna drive us to my place, it'll be faster," you quickly explain to Joon who just nods, happily smiling at Pedro who sends him a fast greeting.
Right as you walk through the parking garage and see the familiar black car, Pedro unlocks it before quickly pushing you into the passenger seat, ignoring your protests and slamming the door before you could slip out.
"Not cool," you utter once he buckles inside the driver's seat.
"Don't make me cry," he fake cries before pulling the car out and hitting the road back to your place.
Due to it being the weekend and everybody wanting to be social and outside for some reason, the streets were packed.
It didn't help that Pedro thought starting a deep conversation with Joon about why electric cars annoyed him, knowing damn well Joon loved the environment, was a good idea.
And Pedro's defense being because he loved the smell of gas made you want to slap him.
As if the heavens felt your annoyance, your wish was granted. You were finally in the front of your apartment complex with Pedro pulling up along the red curb. You would've fought him, but you were desperate to get inside as you barely had an hour left.
"Thanks, see you Monday!" you exclaim, jumping out of the car and slamming the door shut. "Let's go, Joon!"
Barely stepping a foot out, you heard Pedro begin talking. "Wait, what are you guys gonna do?"
"Very intense work," Joon stated before turning to you. "But we got this in the bag."
Pedro squints his eyes, curiously scanning your body language because he does not know what this very intense work meant.
Working out? Making out? What the hell was it?
"Of course we do, love has no limits," you declare, making Pedro cough as you grabbed Joon's arm. "Now, let's go!"
"What are you two going to eat?!" Pedro called out, making you heavily sigh and turn back around.
Faking a smile, you gritted your teeth. "Don't know. Maybe we'll cook or make Jules' grab food as we work."
He makes a face, not convinced he wants to let you guys leave. Now that he was here and his day was over with, he didn't want to be alone.
But he also didn't want to tell you he wanted to stay. He wanted you to invite him- but you weren't getting the hint. Or maybe you were, but you couldn't have him in the room while working with Joon.
"That's cool, did you know I make a killer chicken alfredo?" he speaks out, making you pull an interested face as you were very much not. "Especially with garlic bread."
"Make sure to make that once you get home, safe travels," you wave, trying to turn away but was once again stopped by his voice.
You could feel your kindness slowly leaving your body. Was this the day you would be arrested and charged for murder?
"You know what's the secret with making the pasta?" Pedro questions as Joon replies back a curious, "What?"
"The sauce!" he exclaims as you try to control yourself. He was definitely pushing your buttons but you had to stay calm- you had to.
Joon was too interested in the conversation Pedro was beginning, trying to ask what was in this mysterious sauce. You knew you had to interject or you would both be ticketless.
"Maybe you can tell us about this secretive sauce on Monday, when we next see you," you force a laugh, trying to slowly take a few steps back to inch towards the entrance doors. "We really have to g-"
"Why wait till Monday when I can tell you now?" he claps, getting reading to explain his recipe. "For starters, you need a thick, sauce that can sp-"
"Oh my god!" you squeal, causing both men to jump and stare at you in shock as you rambled on. "The parking structure is around the block, my number is 912- just park and come up! Let's go, Joon!"
With that, Joon and you ran inside and Pedro smiled to himself. His planned worked. He guessed the only way to get to you was by speaking nonsense until you gave in- he'll remember that in the future.
Rushing through your door, you took your coat off as Joon pulled his laptop out if his backpack and set it next to your desk.
You looked at it confusingly before asking, "you carry your laptop with you to work?"
"Duh, an intern should always be prepared for computer work," he replies as if it was the obvious rule we should all know.
Shrugging, you turned on your PC and immediately went to ticketmaster, finding that the tickets weren't going on sale until 35 minutes from now. "We still have time to breathe." That was until you heard light knocks on your door. "Spoke too soon."
Walking up to your door, you see that no one was out there.
That was until Pedro decided to jump out from the side and scare the living shit out of you.
"I'm not doing this," you glare, trying to slam the door on his face, but he forced his way in while laughing at the scream you exhaled before.
You stared at him with no expression as he fell to the floor, continuing to laugh as if your fear was the funniest thing in the world. Joon was even silently giggling in the corner, stopping when you made eye-contact with him.
Trying to find a bowl to fill with water so you could throw at him, your plans were interrupted when you heard your roommate's voice boom across the room.
"Who the fuck is making so much noise?! Some of us are trying to sleep- ah! Why is Mr. Boss here?" Jules' gasps, jumping behind the hallway wall and peeking only her head out, too embarrassed to show off her hello kitty pajamas.
"He's gonna make us some pasta with his secret sauce," Joon happily states as she just gives him a confused look.
"Plus, it's almost 3 in the afternoon...," Pedro adds, giving her a baffled look as to why she is barely waking up.
She just gives him an awkward glance before running back to her room, shutting the door. Saturday's were her day off, of course waking up after 5pm was normal.
"The time limit just turned green! Refresh to join the waiting room-" Joon began screeching, doing so on his computer as you jumped around Pedro to do the same on your PC.
Slowly walking up to where Joon was, Pedro began examining the situation you two were in. Reading over your computer screen, his face fell. "The 1975 2022 World Tour...were you guys seriously trying to buy concert tickets this whole time?!"
Joon and you exchanged innocent glances to one another, not sure if he was judging you for your dedication.
"No, we still are trying to buy tickets," you simply reply, pushing him away from your computer.
His negativity was bad luck.
"This is why you were rushing to get home? All for-"
"Be gone, pessimist. Your energy is not it," you frown, moving your game chair to block his view from your screen. "Joon, block your computer, we can't afford his cynical attitude to ruin our chances of making out with Matty Healy."
"Making out with Matty Healy? You still want that? How is he gonna notice you?" Pedro asks, trying hard not to laugh in your face.
You were quiet for a minute. It was just a crazy thing you said because of all the videos you had seen online whenever it was somebody's birthday or they were just a lucky fan in the front.
You weren't actually dedicated to kissing him, but you did wish.
Joon slowly raised his finger, pointing at Pedro. "You're famous, right? Maybe if you went he'll notice us?"
Eyes widening, Pedro quickly shook his head as you placed your hand over your mouth. He was right, maybe he wouldn't kiss you, but he would for sure meet you if he found out a famous actor with over a million followers on Instagram attended his show.
"Not a chance," Pedro declared, ignoring your puppy dog gaze as you just hoped doing it for long would make him so uncomfortable he would give in.
Nudging Joon, he followed your actions with the sad stare, the two of you in front of the poor actor, leaving him really no choice. You were even thinking about calling Jules out to help, but she probably wouldn't appreciate it by her state of looking homeless.
But if it were on a work day she would totally be in.
"You just look like a deformed bull terrier," he says, pulling a disgusted face. "It's kind of unattractive."
"What is that?" you urge, watching Joon hold a laugh.
"The target dog," Joon answers for you.
Shrieking, you smack Pedro in the arm. "My god, woman! You always hit me."
"You're coming with us to the concert," you announce, watching him roll his eyes. Before he could reject your demand, you beat him to it, "if you don't I'm never talking to you again."
"Please, I've been wishing for that for weeks now," he cheers. "Plus, I'm pretty sure I am busy the day they come."
Pulling yourself close to the computer, you check to see the day they were arriving. "So you're saying you aren't free November 7th?"
"Kid, that's basically a year from now. I can't guarantee anything."
"Damn, you're right," you frown, your mood going down. Joon's idea was pretty amazing, but just wrong timing since the concert was so far away. "You can leave now."
"And what about that famous chicken alfredo?" Pedro chuckled, finding your change in demeanor amusing. You must really love these indie boys.
You were about to reply when Joon intervened. "Oh my god! We are in the queue!"
Twisting your head, you could see the clock had hit 3 o'clock exactly. How did time go by that fast?
"Holy shit! Everybody disconnect from the house wifi on your phones! We can not have anything disturbing us!"
Pulling out your phone, you did what you ranted on and made sure Joon did the same. You even ran to Jules' door and banged on it until she confirmed she did so.
Running back to the computer, you could see there was still 983 people in front of you while Joon had 754. "Why is your computer going faster?"
"This laptop-," he sheepishly smiled. "-cost a fortune, but works like a charm."
Turning back to the screen, you saw the purple line move closer. Not even three minutes in and you only had 534 people left while Joon had 312.
You don't know what you did, but God was certainly rewarding you.
"You're honestly really weird," Pedro confessed, staring at your computer screen. "And sad."
"You would be if you were about to buy tickets to see the love of your life."
"I wouldn't pay anything, money can't buy love," Pedro insists, pulling a chair from your table and placing it in between Joon and you.
"That's very romantic," you swipe an imaginary tear from your cheek. "Save it for the cameras."
His jaw drops as you return back to your computer. In a few moments you were about to be inside the room and you were beyond scared. If you did not get these tickets you don't know how much longer you'll have to live.
"I'm in!" Joon shouts, causing you to jump to his screen.
Great, the two of you were going together anyway so it works out.
"Fuck, what's the presale code?!"
Placing your hands on your head as he begins to panic, you die inside. What the fuck were you going to do now? "Go on Twitter and check!"
To say Pedro was not intrigued would be a lie. It was very fascinating seeing how strongly engaged you were just for a damn ticket. To be honest, he thinks you would be great on a reality tv show- your expressions were just off the roof. He wonders if other people genuinely acted like you.
"It's probably something super simple, try 'thesound,'" you exclaim, watching as he typed right away but frowning when it denied it. "try 'somebodyelse.'"
After each attempt of every famous song they had, it was still wrong. What pissed you off even more was that fans were gatekeeping the code no matter how many times Joon and you tweeted for help.
Greedy little shits.
Eventually, your screen allowed you into the room as well. It was no use, you didn't have the code. "I think I'm going to have a panic attack," you clutch your chest as you felt your lips quiver from sadness. "We were so close."
Pedro just stared at you not believing how miserable you suddenly became. Is this how easily young people let concerts take over themselves? Do people really idolize artists that much to the point where they feel depressed if they don't get tickets?
He shivered imagining how BTS fans dealt with this pressure.
"Let me try," Pedro speaks up, pushing you to the side as he began typing away on your keyboard.
It never hurts to try, right?
Innocently clicking away, your face fell as the check mark appeared, unlocking the room for you. "He got in!"
Hurriedly jumping to the screen, Joon urged Pedro to do the same as you began searching through the seats. Instantly clicking on the floor, you hit the continue button for 2 seats.
Feeling your nerves kick in, your hands begin to shake as you typed in the needed information in order to complete your order. But once you pressed 'place your order," your world stopped.
Ignoring your surroundings, you only focused on the screen. Quietly praying, you're sure Joon and Pedro could hear your desperate requests to the ruler of the universe to grant you your biggest wish: these tickets.
You Got The Tickets To The 1975!
Feeling weightless, you screamed so loud you were sure your neighbors were going to call the cops. Joon looked over, doing the same cheers once he realized you two were set for the show.
Jumping out of your chair, you practically tackled Pedro to the ground as you wrapped your arms around his neck and planted him numerous kisses all over his cheeks.
For once, you were happy you managed to outlast his annoying-self.
"I will forever be grateful for your existence!" you cheer, squeezing his poor body in your arms as he tried to remain in balance, laughing at how nice you suddenly became.
Planting a big kiss on his forehead, you turn to Joon and jump together in happiness. You couldn't believe you managed to score tickets, especially floor seats.
"Wait, what was the code?" Joon asked, pulling away from you and turning to Pedro who tried containing his grin.
"The 1975."
You dropped you arms, feeling incredibly stupid. How could you not write their name as a code attempt? It was shorter than 'it's not living if it's not with you.'
"Joon, we are officially the two dumbest people in New York City," you confess as he slowly nods before stopping.
"Not dumber than Jules though."
You heard her door open before her loud yelling appeared, "Well fuck you too!"
Ignoring her, you jump to Pedro who had his gaze on you already. "Welp! Since we got that out of the way, why don't you make some of that chicken alfredo with your sauce."
He smiled before realizing what you were asking. "What sauce?"
You roll your eyes before hitting his side. "The secretive one you were bothering us about."
Pedro bounces up once he understands what he had mentioned earlier. "Oh, right. That one," he chuckles. "I was kidding, I just wanted to see what you guys were dong."
Your face falls as Joon lets out a sad sigh. "Man, I really wanted to taste how thick and creamy that sauce was."
Pedro just tilts his head to Joon before pointing at the door. "It was great hanging with you guys though! Hey, at least we all worked together for those tickets! I'm gonna head out now, have a good rest of your evening!"
With that, he awkwardly backs away and opens the door, quickly running out before you could argue why he would lie about such a thing.
Before you could process what had just happened, he quickly opens the door again and peeps his head inside. "By the way, you don't actually like a deformed bull terrier," he clarifies. "I was kidding, maybe a cavalier king charles spaniel, those are precious."
And again, he runs out. This time, your face was pretty noticeable when it came to how much redness was present. You cringed to yourself, the littlest of compliments always made you blush- it made you sick.
Joon and you exchanged confused looks to each other. Pedro was a very interesting man.
"What is a cavalier king charles spaniel?" you lightly question.
"The dog in the arms of an angel commercial," Joon simply replies.
Reaching his car, Pedro quickly unlocked the door before jumping in. He felt his heart beating fast, not sure why it was doing so.
Was it because he adored how committed you were for those damn tickets? Maybe. Or how your eyes sparkled once you realized you got the right code? Possibly.
How you kissed him and pulled him in close? Most definitely.
But he would never reveal such a thing to anyone. People would take it wrong and believe he had feelings for you. All he had were feelings one would have for another close friend like you.
His heart was beating because he was excited for you, that's all.
Walking around the studio Monday morning was exhausting. Not only did you pull an all-nighter Saturday night because you were too happy to fall asleep, but you only managed to gain a few hours of sleep on Sunday as you were too busy trying to finish homework due that same night.
"Are you alright? Do you need water?" you heard Bella worriedly ask as you pulled a hoodie over your head and walked near the snacks table.
"I need a pill that can wake me up."
"That could be arranged," she joked, stopping when you sent her a serious look. "Not by me, of course."
Bella managed to wake you up a little once she suddenly pulled out her phone and turned the flash on, flashing it all around your face. "Are you trying to make me blind?!"
"It's supposed to wake you up, is it working?" she grinned, still shoving her phone up your face.
Grabbing her wrist, she stops. "No."
"Damn, that sucks."
Somehow you managed to pull yourself together, walking to where the rest of the interns were once you heard all the directors call out for an urgent meeting.
Probably wanting one of you to run to the coffee shop for coffee as usual.
Seeing Pedro waving at you from the side of his cast's group, you smiled and returned it. He then proceeded to make a confused face, wondering why there was an emergency meeting being held.
You sent the same look, adding a shrug because you were feeling the same. You weren't aware about what was going on, but noticing how many people were present- it must be a big deal.
Finn walked in and stood near the director, sending you a smile that didn't look natural.
If anything it looked fake and...sad?
"A lot of you are probably wondering why I called everyone down here on this early morning," you hear one of the directors begin, making some people nod while others just patiently waited for him to continue. "Starting with wonderful news, we have just been given access to explore our visuals and proceed to try out different surroundings in regards to our planned perception for the series."
Hearing a few people clap, you do the same. You were glad that the set was upgrading, but what did they have to do with everyone?
"Unfortunately," you heard him begin, causing your breathe to hitch. "with locations being held in various places like Canada, we are going to have to make cuts."
Feeling your heart drop, you already knew who he was planning to remove. A big series like this can't send interns they don't care about out of the country for help and you sure as hell couldn't afford to pay for the travels yourself if it came down to it.
You didn't want to make eye-contact with Bella or Pedro and feel their condolences through their expressions. All you wanted to do was be cut already so you could go home and cry at home.
To cry over a job was pathetic, but considering how much you learned and loved to manage it for the past couple months, it was sad to let it go.
As the director went down the list of small departments he planned on letting go, he finally made it to yours. "As for the interns, we are especially grateful for the hard work you brought to this set and trying to fill not only our needs but the casts. If we have any open positions in the near future we will make sure to grant you priority, and if you ever need letters of recommendations for your future activities, I am sure Finn would be able to handle that behind closed doors..."
You zoned out after that, not really caring what else was being said. It was the typical its not us excuse, claiming the company couldn't provide for all of their workers yet were able to spend millions of dollars on each location and its visuals.
The meeting was over when you noticed the directors and producers giving a final sympathetic look to the crowd, bowing their heads before walking back to where their offices were located.
"I feel like crying," you heard Jules sniffle, patting her under eye with her sweater. "But I took time on my eye makeup so I can't!"
Rubbing her shoulder, you tried to distract her from her tears coming out as Joon stood next to you guys, telling her funny spongebob jokes that she did not understand.
"Uh oh, Mr. Boss is coming. He's gonna make me cry, I can't hear his sorrow," Jules' explained, turning her back the other way.
"Hey, kids," you heard Pedro lightly say.
"The tears are coming out!" Jules' exclaimed, running away to the nearest bathroom while Joon and you looked at each other, feeling extremely bad for her.
"Sorry about that," Pedro awkwardly started, continuing once you shook off his unnecessary apology. "I just wanted to talk, see how you guys are handling the unfortunate news."
Joon was the first to speak, sounding surprisingly calm for someone who just lost his internship. "It sucks, but at least it was for an understandable reason. Traveling costs money. Plus, we go to school here, we can't just leave."
You nodded, agreeing with what he said. It was true, you should have known this job would've ended sooner than later, there was only so much you could have done inside a film studio.
The series was an apocalypse that needed feature more outside and environmental sets that looked deadly than a building that was only useful for inside takes.
"How about you?" He questions, sincere eyes following yours as you shrug.
"I am sad but that's the industry," you force out a small chuckle. "If you aren't cut at least once, you aren't gaining the full experience."
Right after you said that, you felt tears lining around the inner corner of your eyes. Looking down, you tru to contain yourself. "I'm going to go check up on Jules."
Reaching out for you, Pedro tries to console you but you were out of his reach in seconds. He hated the tears in your eyes and his job being the reason behind it.
He felt as if it were his fault for your departure when he knows he shouldn't.
It also didn't make him feel any better that Joon followed straight after you once you walked away. He knew he had to do something but he wasn't sure.
All he knew was that he would rather see you smile than cry.
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