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vs-redemption · 3 years

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Crime is Common. Logic is Rare (Ch.27)

Chapter Twenty-Seven: Tension (HawksxGN!Reader)

Plot summary: As a quirk geneticist, you never really imagined yourself getting involved in hero work. Of course, you never imagined catching the eye of a pro hero either. What starts as a great career opportunity turns into a relationship built upon mutual secrets and trust.

Warnings:

⚠️This story contains spoilers from the manga.

⚠️Some events and plot points have been altered from the original manga

Tag List: @gayforkeigo @marshmallow-witch @redflannel @toyo-shiro @elsasshole @astronomyturtle @iambashfulperson @omiwashere

Next Chapter : Chapter Guide

Considering everything you and Hawks had to cope with as a new couple, the relationship itself had gone quite smoothly as far as you were concerned. There was a lot of pressure due to the secretive and dangerous nature of your jobs at present, but disagreements were few and far between, and you were both flexible enough to resolve issues quickly without much heartache. However, the time had finally come for you to butt heads in earnest, and as far as first fights went, you had to believe you both deserved awards for the amount of self-control exercised from both parties.

Neither one of you were allowed to raise your voice, not even on accident in the heat of the moment. Actually, neither of you were allowed to speak at all. You could only scribble back and forth aggressively to convey your feelings because the subject you were arguing over was something neither one of you should have a reason to be discussing in the first place.

That unfortunate topic was Dabi.

You had refused to accept the fire villain’s request for you to spy on your boyfriend, and Hawks was quite adamant that doing so had been the wrong decision. Obviously you understood his concerns about crossing someone as dangerous as Dabi, but as long as Shigaraki’s wellbeing was in your hands, you were fairly certain the villains would leave you basically unharmed. Besides, Hawks was the one who had been against you getting involved any deeper with the League in the first place.

‘He threatened you,’ Hawks scratches down on the paper you were using to have the conversation. This method of communication was becoming frustrating for the both of you, especially since finding time to be together was hard enough as it was without having to waste precious moments of it writing everything you needed to tell each other by hand.

Your eyes slide across the words and the tension that you’d being fighting back ever since the encounter with Dabi began nagging you more persistently in the back of your mind. You do your best to lock the feelings back down and then meet Hawks’ eyes while shrugging off his concern. Certainly, Dabi had threatened you, but your life had already been in danger from the moment Dr. Garaki showed you that he could synthesize Nomu DNA. It wasn’t easy living with that fear, but as long as you had the knowledge inside your brain of what the villains were doing, there would be the chance of them deciding to silence you by taking your life. Adding Dabi into the equation didn’t make that any more or less true.

‘Tell the doctor you’ve reconsidered the offer,’ Hawks aggressively adds a period at the end as if it would turn his words into more of a demand than a suggestion.

It didn’t matter whether he wanted you to do this for your own safety or because he really thought it was the best course of action. You still shake your head even though you hated to see the look of disappointment in his eyes over your answer. You just couldn’t bring yourself to risk it. The villains were already suspicious of your relationship with Hawks. Both Shigaraki and Dabi had brought up the strangeness of dating a hero while helping out the villains. They’d be stupid not to even consider the possibility that you knew about Hawks’ involvement with the league or that one, if not both, of you were playing the role of double agent.

‘Changing my mind now will only make things more complicated.’ You write down the words despite knowing Hawks was smart enough to have already thought of them himself. It was just like the times when you’d mysteriously passed out in Garaki’s lab and encountered Shigaraki for the very first time. Backing out or changing your mind at the wrong moment would send a message to the doctor and the villains. They would wonder who you’d been talking to, or what had transpired after the fact that had made you think twice and go back on things you’d said in the past. It was better to stick to your guns and continue playing the role of morally ambiguous scientist.

‘Not if the information you give them is valuable,’ Hawks counters with a serious look on his handsome face. He looks over at the news reporter rambling from your TV, probably jealous that they were able to talk so freely while he was reduced to passing notes with someone he cared about. He looks back down at the paper and adds, ‘You can give them my real name.’

Upon reading the words, something inside you suddenly snapped, and you fight off the urge to ball up the paper and chuck it at your boyfriend’s head. When you’d first asked him about his name, he’d insisted that ‘Hawks’ was his real name. He’d never explicitly told you that he’d lied back then, but he’d dropped plenty of not-so-subtle hints for you to figure it out on your own. So, it wasn’t so much the reveal that rubbed you the wrong way as it was the timing of it. You pull the paper towards you and pick up the pen.

‘Absolutely not!’ You write and then underline it twice before throwing the pen back down. Hawks looked shocked at your little outburst and slides the paper closer to himself to simply draw a question mark.

A sigh escapes your lips as you study the confusion in his golden eyes. Perhaps it had been a bit of an overreaction. Both you and Hawks had been so careful and logical about everything for so long that there was a certain intimacy missing in the relationship. You had been trying to cope with that fact as best you can, but something about learning his name this way hit you a little differently.

‘Sorry.’ You write the words slowly. ‘I don’t like the idea of finally learning your name just so that I can hand it over to Dabi.’ It made you feel vulnerable to make such a confession because it wasn’t like you to let your personal feelings affect your behavior so strongly. You wanted to be honest with him though, so that the lines of communication between you could be as open as possible.

Hawks reads over your words, features morphing from surprise into sadness as comprehension dawns on him. He meets your gaze before reaching out and pulling you firmly against him. You weren’t sure what to make of the reaction but you wrap your arms around him and bury your face into his chest.

“I never thought of it that way,” Hawks mumbles awkwardly and refuses to let you go for a moment. “You’re right though. It’s not fair.”

You push away from him to look at his face, feeling surprised that he’d even risk saying that out loud. It could probably be passed off as a comment about whatever the news reporter was still ranting about, but you put a finger to his lips to silence him anyway.

“Sorry,” he whispers against your skin.

“Shh!” You reprimand him before taking your finger away and replacing it with your lips, pressing a kiss to his mouth to show him everything was all right and that you weren’t upset with him. He relaxes right away and warps his arms more tightly around you to hold you closer. You had to pull away after a moment though because your time together was limited, and you’d yet to agree on a solution to your problem.

“I love you,” he tells you with a longing in his eyes that told you he hated the current situation just as much as you did.

“I love you too, bird-kun.” You smile while taking his hand and giving it a squeeze. He glances back down at the paper on the table and picks up the pen begrudgingly.

‘I’ll think of something else for you to tell him.’ He meets your eyes to see how you’d respond and is once again disappointed when you shake your head.

‘I won’t be the one to give him anything he can use against you.’ You write your reply.

“I appreciate the sentiment,” he smiles sadly before jotting down his response.

‘If you don’t cooperate, your life will be in danger once Shigaraki wakes up.’

Seeing the truth once again so plainly spelled out gave you pause, but you were determined to stick to the original plan the two of you had agreed to along with the Hero Commission.

‘That’s why we’re going to make sure to end this before that even happens.’ You scribble down the reply before clicking the pen closed. Hawks understood then that you weren’t going to be changing your mind. He sighs quietly and puts his hands up in surrender.

“Ok,” he tells you while glancing at the TV again to check the time. “I have to get back to my patrol soon.”

“I know,” you lean in and kiss him again on the cheek. “I wish we had more time.”

“Can I stop by after you get back from the lab?” he asks although he already knew your schedule.

“Sorry,” you frown. “I’ll be there late tonight. It would be better if you stop by in the morning.”

Hawks grimaced at the thought of you spending so many hours watching over Shigaraki’s unconscious body, but it was at least a little better than being involved with a fully awake Dabi. It was going to be so important for the Heroes to find a way to stop the villains before Shigaraki woke up. More lives than just your own would be in danger if they failed. You trusted Hawks though, and knew he and the commission would do everything they could to prevent the worst case scenario.

“You bet,” Hawks stands up from the couch and stretches his arms and wings as much as he could to prepare himself for his patrol. “Send me a text when you’re awake and I’ll bring coffee.”

“That would be much appreciated,” you smile as you watch him go to the door and pull on his boots and flight jacket. He gives you another quick peck on the lips, says his goodbyes, and before you know it he’s taking off into the sky.

#Hawks x Reader #Keigo Takami x Reader #Bnha x reader #mha x reader #hawks #keigo takami #bnha #mha #Cindy's Writing

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astrology-india · 3 years

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Venus in Aries Man - Tips To Find Your Perfect Partner

New Post has been published on https://www.astrology-india.com/venus-in-aries-man/

Venus in Aries Man - Tips To Find Your Perfect Partner

Bold and self-assured, the man with his Venus in Aries knows just what he wants and is determined to get it.

Aries is the hunter of the zodiac and loves the chase.

When a man has this placement in this natal chart and has feelings for you, you will have no doubts about it because he will let you know in the most straightforward way possible.

The Venus In Aries Key Features

Positive traits: Confident and energetic, Aries is the youngest of the zodiac signs and when it comes to love, he is childlike and playful- a dynamic and powerful lover.

Negative traits: The Venus in Aries man can be impulsive, insensitive, and selfish- and in certain situations a bit of a brute.

Ideal partner: The Venus in Aries man loves someone strong and confident like himself.

He needs a partner with the energy and thick skin to throw what he dishes out right back at him since he is known to enjoy a good lover’s quarrel from time to time.

Needs to work on: He needs to work on his commitment. Fair or not, the Venus in Aries man is stereotyped as the player of the zodiac.

The Venus In Aries Man Personality

Aries is a fire sign connected by a trine, as well as being the first sign of the zodiac. A man with this placement will be full of life and vitality. He is strong and bold, sometimes to a fault.

He is known as a risk-taker, just like a little boy jumping off of things at the playground, except he does not grow out of this ever.

At the office, he is likely asking his coworkers to sign his arm cast and showing it off proudly. If he does not work at an office, he might be a daredevil or a stunt double.

A man with his Venus in Aries likes to get a rile out of others. Once he finds your sore spot, he will poke and poke until you crumble.

He does not mean anything ill by this, or at least he does not think so, rather it is just part of his childlike demeanor (that and he seems to enjoy the occasional clash of personalities now and then).

The Venus in Aries man is usually direct with his action and speech, he says what he means and means what he says. Unless, of course, he is purposely being vague, which he likes to do from time to time (likely to get a rise out of you).

He is dictated by impulse and this seems to mostly work to his advantage except when it does not, he always seems to walk away unscathed.

The Venus in Aries man could benefit from slowing down a bit when it comes to matters of love, taking in a deep breath, and thinking before acting.

Because of his impulsive nature, he may be prone to declare his love, sometimes too quickly.

You can find out more about this in our Aries man in love article here.

Positive Traits

Bold and Confident, will defend someone he loves to his last breath.

Playful and Energetic, usually interested in new ventures, rather than sitting watching TV.

Strong-willed, so any partner will need to learn how to hold her ground.

Mentally strong, with a deep desire to succeed at everything he does.

Negative Traits

The below traits are generalizations linked to a Venus in Aries man. They can vary enormously with the exact time of birth. A full astrology reading is always advised if thinking of long-term commitment.

Impulsive. Has a tendency to make decisions before fully understanding the consequences.

Insensitive. Can be taken for not caring, but this is because he doesn’t give himself time.

Bully. Can be seen as bullying but to him, it is just banter.

Immature. His sense of fun and high-jinx can be taken for immaturity.

Selfish and Vague.

What Attracts Venus in Aries Man

A man with his Venus in Aries loves the chase and the thrill of falling in love. Aries is known as the hunter of the zodiac world.

The most exciting thing for a man with this Venus placement is the freshness of a new romance or the start of a new adventure.

If you are the adventurous type and the Aries has his sights on you, buckle up because you are in for a wild ride.

What catches his eye the most are women who are self-assured and full of confidence. Shyness and self-doubt are major turns off for a man with his Venus in Aries.

He tends to like a woman who is physically strong, possibly somebody who is tomboyish to a degree, or at the very least athletic.

The Venus in Aries man has strength and seeks someone out who can keep up with him, bouncing off of walls and such.

A mate with vigor is important to Venus in Aries man. He is attracted to such a person, but also if you lack this, he will likely wear you down and stress you out until you get fed up and leave, or he eventually becomes bored and he leaves.

Sometimes it is difficult to tell if the Venus in Aries man is looking for a lover or competition.

Even though a relationship is not a sport in the Olympics, the crowned Aries will still make sure he gets gold anyway and then rub it in your face.

While the Venus in Aries man likes to play games, he needs someone who is straight forward and is direct with him.

He tends to not pick up on subtle gestures and emotional forms of communication. If you are in a relationship with a man with this chart placement, it might not be a good idea to drop hints that will probably go over his head.

Most Compatible With Venus in Aries Man

The Venus in Aries man is most compatible with whoever has the most fire in their charts.

I say this half-jokingly, but those with a lot of feminine placements (or who are sensitive and emotional,) like the water and earth signs will not be a good match for him for obvious reasons.

The best matches for the man with his Venus in Aries will be others who have their Venus in a fire sign.

This includes partners with their Venus in Leo, Sagittarius, and also Aries.

The other key factor in Venus in Aries compatibility will be the other person’s sun sign. People with their Sun in Aries, Leo, or Sagittarius will be a good fit for the young ram.

Of course, it is important to take all of the factors of a natal chart to determine romantic compatibility.

If you want to know more about Aries compatibility then you can learn more about the best match for Aries here.

Final Thoughts

The proud young Aries is full of vitality and energy, he needs a mate that can move at his pace.

A man with his Venus in Aries is a dynamic lover and seeks a powerful partner who in some ways is also like a challenger to him.

If you have a Venus in Aries man in your sights, just make sure you have some thick skin and enough fire to keep up with him.

To create a long-term relationship with Venus in Aries man you need to understand his strengths and weaknesses so that he respects you.

Relationship and dating expert Anna Kovach has written a book explaining how an Aries man thinks and acts in romantic situations.

If you want to be on a level playing field with the exuberant Aries guy and make him want you and desire you, Anna will show you how in a preview of Aries Man Secrets.

A Vital Message From Astrology – India

If you want to give yourself the best chance of creating a long-term future with a Venus in Aries man, then the next couple of sentences you read here may be the most important of your life.

It’s all about understanding the traits and characteristics of an Aries man.

Someone who has studied this is devoted astrologer and relationship expert Anna Kovach, who has written a book entitled Aries Man Secrets.

This work covers every aspect of an Aries man including how they think and act in a serious romantic relationship.

If you have the hots for an Aries man then you need to know all you can about him.

You can check it out in the private preview below, and decide for all your own reasons if Aries Man Secrets is right for you.

Take A Look At Aries Man Secrets Here >

#Aries man #Attraction #compatibility #Venus in Aries

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spnfanficpond · 4 years

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February 2020 Angel Fish Awards

Every month all of you fantastic writers work your asses off to post some truly incredible stories. Our Angel Fish Awards are the way for all of us, as a community of writers and readers, to lift each other up and give praise to those who have captured our attention and deserve a few kind words.

The monthly Angel Fish Awards are peer-nominated, meaning ANYONE IN THE POND CAN NOMINATE ANY POND MEMBER’S FIC. While the Pond was founded to support the Guppies, everyone in this community deserves to be showered with love and feedback, and we hope that by opening this up as a Pond wide system, we’ll be able to share the love as far as it can go.

NOTE: WE’VE BEEN HAVING OCCASIONAL PROBLEMS WITH ASKS GOING MISSING. Please use the Submit button when submitting your nominations and make sure you’re signed into Tumblr or your URL won’t show. (If the form asks for your name and email address, then you’re not signed in.) If you like, you can also send a message to Michelle @mrswhozeewhatsis or Mana @manawhaat to check and make sure we got your submission.

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, HERE ARE THIS MONTH’S ANGEL FISH AWARDS!

There are NINE (9) stories this month with more than one nomination!! Be sure to check through all ninety (yeah, that’s 90!!!) nominations!!

Nominated by @flamencodiva

Frat Boy (series) by @luci-in-trenchcoats

This is one of my all time favorite stories by Michelle! It was one of the first ones I read when I joined Tumblr. it is a really good read and I recommend it highly!

A River In Egypt (series) by @crashdevlin

Holy crap this is another amazing fic by Cassie! I mean the way she writes Sam’s inner monologue is amazing! and the rest is yet to come!

Darken (series) by @impala-dreamer

I love Beka’s Stories! This one is my absolute favorite! and my god was it angsty as hell and I ate it all up!

Nominated by @becs-bunker

The Accidental Sexter (oneshot) by @scorpiongirl1

OK, where to start with this one?! I honestly sweated my way through reading it. It was so hot and steamy and let’s be honest, even over 40, Dean can get it anytime. This just proves it!🔥🔥 Some accidents are so worth it, that one sure was!

Nominated by @erins-culinary-service

Call of the Ocean (series) by @flamencodiva

This is the first mermaid! Reader fic I’ve read but I’m loving it so much! It’s a collaboration fic, but the chapters go so well together you can’t even tell. It’s also a super slow burn and I know will be 100% worth the wait.

When You Fall (series) by @flamencodiva

This is such an amazing and dark fic. READ THE WARNINGS THOUGH!! There are a lot of things that could trigger someone, but if you do read the story it will leave you wanting more are the end of every chapter.

Fighting For A Future (series) by @flamencodiva

*Uncontrollable screaming noises* that’s the only way I can describe how much I love this and how excited I get when I see an update about this fic!

Running With Wolves (series) by @waywardrose13

This series rips my heart out every single chapter and I always come back for more because how could I not? It’s an angsty A/B/O fic and I can’t wait to find out how this ends since there’s still so much left in the fic to explore.

Nominated by @fictionalabyss

Privacy (oneshot) by @evansrogerskitten

Can I nominate this glorious piece of work for the AFA!? It gets right to the point and has you looking forwards to that climax at the end and what gets him there.

Porch Swing (oneshot) by @myinconnelly1

omfg. The angst was almost subtle until it wasn’t. Ripped my god damn heart out.

Unexpected (oneshot) by @tumbler-tidbits

When I wrote Sleeping with the wrong Winchester, there was next to nothing for small dick Winchesters. You don’t know how happy I was to find this in the pond! I LOVEEEEEE small dick Winchester fics. WE NEED MORE!

Never In Fact Homeless (oneshot) by @slowdownsugar

Perfect. It’s just perfect, that’s all that really needs to be said here. It’s short, and sweet, and utterly perfect.

You Can’t Save Them All (oneshot) by @sorenmarie87

It’s an older fic that I had forgotten about until I stumbled on it again. Its easy to picture the scene, her playing the piano with a broken heart, and Dean just being there so she isn’t alone. still beautiful.

Meeting Mr. Smith (oneshot) by @evansrogerskitten

Alpha!Dean Smith is just so.. *happy sigh*

Back to Him (oneshot) by @focusonspn

That ending really made this fic for me. It’s such a Dean ending. The determination to put his pain aside and and get someone back.

One Night Lover (oneshot) by @thing-you-do-with-that-thing

As always, I’m sucked in, and I can’t look away. By the end, I’m heartbroken and trying desperately to pick up the pieces and while begging to make it better.

Till the End of Time (oneshot) by @girl-next-door-writes

This made me so happy you don’t even know. I loved this. I love the idea of this. I just- I love this.

The New Sheriff (series) by @iflostreturntosteverogers

I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS TO START POSTING! Bad ass female main with a cowboy!Dean? Fuck yes! Get hyped, and get reading. *impatiently awaiting chapter 2*

Nominated by @thegirlwhorunswithwinchesters

We Know (oneshot) by @icequeen6666

Randomly came across this fic and, well, anyone who knows me won’t be surprised I couldn’t say no to a good dose of pure angst. I loved the pace in this oneshot. It was quick, but still managed to keep the suspense. And the ending broke my heart, as always.

Too Late, Now (oneshot) by @theholyfoxface

I don’t read many RPF’s but this one sucked me right in and there was nothing I could do about it. It was a beautiful combination of heartbreaking and heartwarming in a way I’m not sure how to describe properly. Yet, the author managed to do it absolutely perfectly.

You Scared Us (oneshot) by @theholyfoxface

Always love reading fics by fellow guppies and shining a well deserved spotlight on them through these nominations. This one I enjoyed very much. I loved the way Dean was portrayed as the more reasonable one while still being his stern self, trying to get things done his way.

You, Me & The Devil Makes Three (series) by @supersassyprobablysad

This series is very intriguing. I love the OC’s wit and the overall backstory of her and her siblings. Definitely going to keep an eye out for the next chapters to find out how this mystery will unravel.

Porch Swing (oneshot) by @myinconnelly1

Well, this sure broke me into a million pieces. I’m a sucker for angst and this piece of writing certainly delivered. It’s sad but it’s gorgeous and I’m in love.

A Day at the Cabin (oneshot) by @cloverhighfivewritestoo

All the fluff. This is so sweet, after reaching the end I went back and read it a second time right away. I would also like to say that Sam being the little spoon is something I can 100% get behind. Pun intended.

Let Me Go (oneshot) by @foreverwayward

Though the ‘Always keep fighting’ part definitely got me bad, I was an absolute fool thinking that would be the hardest part. This was so beautifully written, I don’t quite know what to say. I guess the heartbreak I’m feeling after reading this is all on me, since there was a fair warning given right at the top.

Notes (oneshot) by @kittenofdoomage

I stumbled across this fic and I just…… wow. Apart from the signature amazing writing from this author, which I keep getting blown away by, I just really loved the idea for the plot. The way it was set up with the secret blog and the notes while the brothers acted like they had no idea. I’ll say it again: Wow.

Nominated by @kittenofdoomage

Control and Release (series) by @thecleverdame

I lost five hours of my life to this beauty. It’s so perfect. I can’t even find the right words to describe how perfect this is. If you love Sam, and you’re into BDSM, or even if you just like really amazing smut, you need to read this.

The Oath (series) by @thecleverdame

This story is dark, so heed the warnings, but it is another brilliant masterpiece. Absolutely fantastic.

Call Of The Ocean (series) by @flamencodiva and @anathewierdo

There aren’t many mermaid AUs out there, so this is a rare gem. The story that these two are weaving is intriguing, angsty, funny, and just plain awesome. I’m really enjoying reading it and can’t wait to see what happens.

Just A Number (oneshot) by @crispychrissy

I adored this oneshot for all the following reasons; the reader is a badass, Dean is spot-on, and the smut was h-h-hahmazing.

Bury It (series) by @crashdevlin

Heed the warnings on this one, folks, it is not for the faint-hearted. It deals with some brutal themes, but it’s fucking awesome. I’m really enjoying seeing the journey from Dean’s perspective, despite how completely fucked up it is. lol

What Goes Bump In The Night (series) by @saxxxology

If you haven’t heard of Saxxy, you are missing out, especially where it comes to her Sam A/B/Os. This series is no exception to her amazing level of work; it’s dark and twisty and just beautiful.

All Our Sins (oneshot) by @impala-dreamer

It’s smutty, sinful, delicious - you just can’t go wrong.

Nominated by @impala-dreamer

Cherry Red (oneshot) by @dontshootmespence

I’m trying not to nominate you every month, but geezeus… HOLY HELL THIS IS MAGIC SMUT RIGHT HERE. ughhhh i’m a little … emotional about this.

Also, your writing is amazing in this. Like, it FELT like an old timey film and I dug that so much. Great, Great work.

‘He stares up with rapt attention, watching the curve of her body as she places herself over his knee; he’s pretty sure he’s died and gone to heaven, but he’s been to heaven before and it ain’t this fun.’

That line is magic. Mhm. Love it.

My Brother’s Keeper (oneshot) by @cleighwrites

I don’t trust a lot of people to write Wincest with the respect and soul-level love that I believe it should be written with, as such, I don’t read a whole lot of it, except from certain people.

THIS IS PERFECT. It’s hurt/comfort Wincest, which is my absolute favorite, and then you somehow made Sam into the perfect needy sub, and it was so well written and respectful to the idea and the characters and just… it was really really well done. Bravo. Thank you.

Dutiful (oneshot) by @stusbunker

Ya know that scene in Julie & Julia where Julie is trying to describe what eating an egg feels like for the first time and Amy Adams gets all like wide eyed and swoony and licking her lips and just…

Yeah, that was me reading this. God, that was good. Just… I can’t really explain it but I FELT it. Really Really good work.

Nominated by @sorenmarie87

Roots (series) by @manawhaat

I wish I could submit all three parts for a nomination because this mini series featuring JDM is so sweet and fluffy <3 Mana really knocked it out of the park.

More Than Anything (oneshot) by @iflostreturntosteverogers

This fic in particular, I know that Carrie was gonna through a rough time and who doesn’t love a good comfort fic? I know I do.

The New Sheriff (series) by @iflostreturntosteverogers

It’s no lie that I love AU’s and I was so excited when iflostreturntosteverogers said she was gonna write a Western AU. The set up for the first part is perfect and Sara, the OC girl - I would do anything for.

When You Fall (series) by @flamencodiva

I had this particular fic on my list to read for such a long time, and I’m glad I finally read it. The plot is a little heavy but I highly recommend this one. I can’t wait to see what she has in store for future parts.

Nominated by @mrswhozeewhatsis

Anything and Everything (oneshot) by @rockhoochie

I said this in my reblog of this story, but I want to say it here, too: This is freaking BEAUTIFUL! I had to look up the song quoted, and this is just so perfect for that song, and the song is perfect for this story. *throws kudos at Sarah forever*

Nominated by @supersassyprobablysad

Gods of Twilight (series) by @thecleverdame

It was an excellently written and refreshing take on the ABO concept and I really enjoyed it!

Protector (oneshot) by @fictionalabyss

It’s only 3 chapters in but I already can’t wait for the next one. I’m super excited to see where this goes and imagining Dean as a biker does all kinds of things to me lol

Lemon Drop (oneshot) by @impala-dreamer

It’s basically PWP BUT it is amazing none the less. Who knew that a Hypno Kink could be so hot?

Nominated by @fangirlxwritesx67

More in the Mortar Than the Pestle (oneshot) by @thoughtslikeaminefield

This is one lush, sexy story featuring Dean and the always-gorgeous Rihanna. An absolute treat!

Seasons (series) by @thoughtslikeaminefield

I don’t know how I missed this series but let me tell you, no one should miss it! I read the first chapter and wanted to wait, read the rest slowly, slowly. NOPE. I dropped everything, sat right down and read it ALL. It’s a beautiful Dean Winchester x OFC, told in an amazingly creative non-linear format, with chapters that follow the seasons of the year as well as the seasons of their relationship. It’s MJ, so of course I don’t have to tell you that her Dean is spot on, every detail is perfect, and the sex is mind blowing. Just - read it. But be aware that once you start, you may not be able to stop

Try (oneshot) by @there-must-be-a-lock

Look, honestly, Winchester baby fanfics are a dime a dozen. Which makes this one stand out all the more for how good it is. Lou describes it as “flufftastic smut” and it is, it really is. The sex is smoking hot, of course, but there’s so much meaning and emotion to it. I’m a Sam girl anyway, so the whole thing is just *swoons* *cries*

Nominated by @princessmisery666

Magnetic (oneshot) by @crashdevlin

Only a few words yet gave me all the feels. Exactly how I imagine Sam would be *swoon*

Just A Number (oneshot) by @crispychrissy

I am taking part in @beccaanne814 reblog challenge and it’s all about finding new authors and sharing each others works but I think this maybe the third fic of Chrissy’s I’ve recommended because she consistently writes stories I love and this was no exception. She gives me all the feels, laughing, crying, anger, sad. Basically I’m a huge fangirl and I don’t have to right words to express how much I love her work.

Nominated by @wingedcatninja

Good Literature (series) by @peridottea91

I don’t normally have the patience for a series, especially one that is still being updated. Thank goodness I signed up to beta this one because I would have missed out on some truly outstanding writing. The story is compelling, the characterization is on point, and the OC adds an intriguing layer. This could easily be a story arc on the actual show, and I highly recommend it to anyone who enjoys classic SPN.

Nominated by @thoughtslikeaminefield

Shackled (series) by @itmighthavebeenintentional

Valerie has long been one of my fave fic authors and one of my dearest friends. This was such an unexpected but welcome deluge of poetry and imagery. I was on the edge of my seat and breathless every time she sent me an updated Gdoc.

Please, if you read nothing else this month, READ THIS.

Nominated by @mummybear

Rules are Rules (oneshot) by @thoughtslikeaminefield

As soon as I read this fic i was hooked!! I have reread it at least four times at this point!! I freaking love it!! MJ is incredible and so is everything she writes! Since tumblr ate the stupid ask i sent her after reading, I figured I could do this at least :) Much love honey!!

Nominated by @supernatural-jackles

The Fun Behind Conventions (oneshot) by @focusonspn

I came across this bad boy while searching for something else and man was I excited to read this. This fic is hot as hell! Very very NSFW, but holy! There is nothing hotter than this kind of sandwich! It was so well written and the attention to detail left me… let’s just say I’ll be going back to reread this one! Amazing!!

The Accidental Sexter (oneshot) by @scorpiongirl1

This had everything I was looking for! Humor wrapped in a hot fic! Dean accidentally sending a naughty picture shouldn’t be this much of a turn on but this is - this is freakin’ awesome! Words can’t do this one justice! Please, just read this one and you’ll see exactly what I mean! Absolutely awesome story!

High School Bullshit (oneshot) by @fictionalabyss

I don’t know why this one struck me as much as it did. I read this one, then I lost it until I was thinking about it. I searched high and low trying to find it again so I could reread it! I really enjoyed this one because I could relate to it in some way. Never feeling like I could get the hot guy I had a crush on because of high school bullshit. I can definitely relate to this reader and it was nice to see something like this in a fic and have an outcome like it does! Awesome job!

Nominated by @thelittleredwhocould

What Lurks Beneath the Surface (series) by @saxxxology

I. Love. Soulless. Sam. So. Fucking. Much. Also there’s a line about Sam’s nose in the first chapter and I feel. Attacked. So rude.

What Goes Bump in the Night (series) @saxxxology

I love me some dark A/B /O and this series hits all the right buttons. Angst, a dark and gritty world, Alpha!Sam (*heart eyes*). It’s just ugh. So good.

About a Boy (series) by @percywinchester27

I think this series is going to be in my Hall of Fame till the end of time. Ana’s plot pulled my in from the first chapter and I’m so excited to see where this series goes!

There’s Something Strange (series) by @alleiradayne

I found this on AO3 by accident and immediately fell in love. The case is super interesting, the characters are well done, and over all I really enjoyed it.

Her Saviours (series) by @bamby0304

Been doing a lil reread of this series and rediscovering how much I adore it.

I Know Your Wife (She Wouldn’t Mind) (series) by @teamfreewill-imagine

I will forever recommend this fic to anyone who will listen. It’s the only RPF fic I’ll read and it’s just. SO GOOD.

Nominated by @myinconnelly1

Tighter Harder Faster (oneshot) by @impala-dreamer

Alright look this was just straight up dirty. Ok, what else can I saw but that I needed a cold shower after this.The Girl I Knew

The Girl I Knew (oneshot) by @emilyshurley

Uh, what can I say here? I have never been so honored to have fanfic written of my fanfics before, but emilyshurley has given me the highest medal, in the absolute cutest way imaginable.

Gods of Twilight (seires) by @thecleverdame

This fic was binge worthy. I could put my phone down and I simply wanted to hurry onto the next chapter. Seriously don’t read it if you need any time to adult.

The Private Invader (oneshot) by @negans-lucille-tblr

This was some dirty below the belt cheating. It was amazing, and I just was like *heart eyes* the entire way through.

The Truth (series) by @negans-lucille-tblr

While this type of fic is not normally my go to, it truly grips you and puts into the minds of the characters. I was actually scared and ashamed of myself feeling like I had done something wrong, when it was the characters.

Nominated by @tumbler-tidbits

Everything (series) by @there-must-be-a-lock

Sweet Holy Effervescent Jesus this is the hottest thing I have read in a long time! Its raw and messy and desperate, and SO fucking delicious! Lou even managed to get some fluff in too! Do yourself a favor and binge this fic! (just make sure your alone and have spare panties)

Bottle Service (series) by @thoughtslikeaminefield

This is one of my longtime faves, and it never disappoints! My girl MJ captures the true intimacy between the characters and a smut fic has never sparked such emotion in me. It’s beautiful, and passionate and there’s a sequel! It’s called Full Service and it is equally amazing!

Worthless (oneshot) by @maddiepants

This one just ugh *sobs*. Erica captures the struggle of self-harm in this fic very well. Its heartbreaking and soul shattering, but it also reminds you that you can’t trust those voices in your head, and that there is someone who cares about you. TW: thoughts of suicide and self harm.

Hard To Love (oneshot) by @maddiepants

I’m a sucker for a good song fic and Erica does this one justice! She really captures Dean’s self-hatred and really makes you want to wrap our favorite hunter in hugs. My bestie has a gift for the angst, but she gives you fluff too.

His Property (series) by @negans-lucille-tblr

This fic is glorious! There’s angst, fluff, and smut so hot you’ll be a melted puddle of arousal. Believe it or not Bee also managed to make me hate one of my favorite Supernatural characters! There is a definite twist in this one :)

Since You’ve Been Gone (series) by @negans-lucille-tblr

This series quickly captured my heart. I don’t remember what it was that captured me but the mix of fluff, angst, and smut certainly kept me around! The best part? There’s a sequel called “Now You’re Here” and in March she’s releasing Part three of the Trilogy!

Ask Me (oneshot) by @evansrogerskitten

This one is another favorite of mine by my girl Ash! This hits so many of my kinks there are not words to describe the hotness. In fact I’m pretty sure my reblog contained gifs and keyboard smashes lol. Read it! You’ll thank me!

With Wolves (series) by @bamby0304

This one is a classic favorite! This fic was my first foray into the A/B/O world AND series works. I was still somewhat new to the fandom and tumblr when I discovered it and I was immediately hooked! I love the way Amber has incorporated our favorite characters into this alternate universe while still maintaining their cannon personalities. It’s an emotional roller coaster, so buck up and enjoy the ride!

Spanner in the Works (series) by @bamby0304

This one has a special place in my heart! It makes me smile and squee and just overall make a fool of myself. It’s incomplete right now because Amb is on hiatus, but there are seventeen AMAZING chapters that you can read right now! I just love it, plain and simple.

Cupid Can Shove His Arrow Right Up His... (oneshot) by @bamby0304

Since it’s February, I thought it appropriate to share this yummy piece! Holy Fucking shit I LOVED THIS! The attitude, the sass, the fucking innuendos… THE FUCKING! Jesus Christ on a crumbled cracker, This one killed. Go beg Amber for MORE of this! And make sure you say PLEASE! We need to see ALL those scenarios played out… Read this one in privacy ladies and have a helper handy.

Wrecked (oneshot) by @thoughtslikeaminefield

JFC if this isn’t every Jensen girls fantasy! This one just ruined me! Wall sex, hand over your mouth, soft nips and kisses *shudders* give it a read!

Our Little Secret (series) by @sis-tafics

If you’ve got a kink then Jill’s got you covered 😏 This 25 chapter serious has it all! A little angst, a dash of fluff, and whole lot of smut! Each chapter explores a different kink between Dean and the Reader from the Readers point of view while Dean tries to show her how beautiful she is. I recommend you take the time and read the series in sequence, y’all will not regret it!

Midnight Blue (oneshot) by @rockhoochie

This Fic was so fucking amazing! Precise and descriptive words paint an amazingly vivid picture that fills all your senses! You can actually see, hear, smell, and feel the things going on between the reader and Sam! I could be biased since this fic hit nearly all my kinks *fans self* but indulge in this extremely passionate sensory experience for yourself and read it!!

Bruised (oneshot) by @wayward-and-worn

This is oddly sweet and fluffy with a hen pecking Dean, and absolutely fucking hilarious at the same time 😂😂 I love it!

Not Letting Go (oneshot) by @kittenofdoomage

Whoo! I love a good A/B/O fic and this one is delicious! Just enough smut to please you and leave you begging for more!

The Maddening Empty (oneshot) by @impala-dreamer

Whew. I don’t know if it’s my praise!kink or my dom!kink but this little number right here had me wishing I waited to read until after work! This ones a panty ruiner folks!

Notes (oneshot) by @kittenofdoomage

JFC this piece is a dream come true! What would you do if Sam and Dean discovered your smutty fanfiction? Well this hot little number lets you know exactly what they would do!

The Mirror (oneshot) by @wheresthekillswitch

This sweet little drabble speaks volumes for those of us who have insecurities (read: all of us!). Short, sweet, and to the point! Hold your head high.

Only One Woman I Trust (oneshot) by @georgialouisea

This is just absolutely precious! You think you know what’s going on but there’s a surprise! This one will rot your teeth ❤️

Inked Up (oneshot) by @evansrogerskitten

Ever want to know what goes on inside Dean’s head when he sees a hot girl? This fic is super hilarious and totally fluffy! I love Dean’s internal struggle to keep himself in check 😂 this one is fun!

Hunt Hard Play Harder (two parts - link is to Pt. 1) by @rockhoochie

HOLY FUCKING SHIT! This is…. this is just. WOW! Holy Hell I can barely breathe. This one gives you Dom!Dean AND Sub!Dean and both are equally sensual and erotic! There’s even a surprise ending! Which had my pulse racing… Whew 🔥 My bitches y’all will love this one!

Mr. Quackers (oneshot) by @impala-dreamer

They say that crack is whack, well in this case quack is whack 😂😂 This little drabble with have you laughing until you cry, it’s just that ducking funny! (See what I did there?)

Holding On (oneshot) by @idreamofplaid

This is so beautiful and so painful I was teary eyed! They never really show us how the boys deal with their inner demons on the show, but Robin does a phenomenal job of painting that picture!

Clear Your Mind (oneshot) by @impala-dreamer

Oh sweet smiling sinner this was miraculous! So soft, so gentle, so loving… this was Sam making love to the reader and the way he takes care of her makes it that much more passionate! Ladies and gents THIS is how you take care of your lover! Fucking love you Beka!

Thunder Rolls (oneshot) by @amanda-teaches

This was intensely passionate! The sex is hot but the love behind it really makes it great! The authors use of super descriptive descriptions of your pleasure will have you clenching your thighs!

Thank you all for the awesome work and great feedback!

These are not actual awards! This system is set up so everyone in the pond has a chance to share the love and promote a fic/author that has grabbed your attention. The more people that participate, and the more everyone remembers to submit their own fics after posting, the better this will be :D

THANK YOU ALL AGAIN, KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK, AND AS ALWAYS, HAPPY WRITING!

#afa masterlist #angel fish awards #spnfanficpond #fan fiction #fanfiction #fan fic #fanfic #spn fan fiction #spn fanfiction #spn fanfic #supernatural fan fiction #supernatural fan fic #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fanfic #fic rec #spn fic rec #supernatural fic rec #spn fan fic

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theunholygrails · 4 years

Text

Very Differently

Summary: This isn’t really new, just something I never got around to posting here. Basically my take on Budapest with an OC added to the mix for fun.

Masterlist

Zdravstvuyte

The shadows cast from the wastefully clad guests in the soft angles and indecipherable masses were notably more elegant than the calculating frowns of their creators. A gloved hand traced along a freshly polished curling oak banister as Sonja made her was to join the babbling benefactors. Leaflets of conversations rustled not long enough to take root but simply flew past on the careful air of disinterest her fellow hosts held about them. With a sharp nod of her head and a demure curve of her lips, she joined the nearest transaction.

Arms dealing can be tricky business when neither party particularly trusted the other.

Jewels painted the necklines of her most generous buyer and in their pristine surfaces, she could make out the warning flash of the smallest red dot. Sonja shifted with a subtle flip of her hair to block the shot and simultaneously tapped her earpiece.

“Ma’am, I do believe my husband is coming down with something fatal.” she said.

Even if she did not have a husband to speak of, the message was abundantly clear—the event was compromised because Black Widow herself was present.

“Take care of it, Chief. I need this night to be spotless.”

“Got it.”

Security hustled onto the floor at Sonja’s signal to escort each of the dozen or so guests back to their armored vehicles.

With the prompting of her boss in her ear, Sonja slipped out the back door to attempt to uncover any tracks the Widow might have left behind.

The wet asphalt did little to help her heels find traction as she scanned the nearest buildings for the optimal vantage point the spy must have taken to train a snipper on people under her protection. With the rest of her security team busy locking down the premises, she was left to the goose chase even though looking for tracks from this particular prey was about as promising as searching for footprints after a storm.

She tensed when something popped right beside her ear and the sharp slap of metal hit her cheek. She scolded her hammering heart and forced a calm gaze to the arrow that kissed her skin and was now imbedded in the wall. Her hand went to the dual blades tucked against her thighs knowing full well that any assassin after her would not be foolish enough to miss twice.

A test of her ear piece told her its signal had been knocked out somehow. A heavy pair of boots splashed down beside her and she whipped into a defensive pose before the archer could cut her mission short.

The man kneeling across from her had his bow pressed to the ground and his black stealth suit clinging to him like any woman in her proper mind would in a scenario a little less lethal than this. Given a situation where she were allowed to use her real name and wash the blonde dye from her hair, she might have done just that because his looks were wasted on the dark, filthy streets of Samara, Russia.

“Hello, easy, Chief. I’m not here for you. Sonic took out your communications, also I was listening in a little bit, Ma’am is a weird name. Is that like the birth one or did she rename herself that? I’m looking for the Widow. You know anything?”

“Does anyone?” she flicked her blades so they would glint in warning beneath the lazy stars.

“They sent one person out to challenge her? Seems a little under kill. Unless you’re just the bait.”

She advanced a step to show just how much of a danger she truly was. His mouth curved up in amusement when he rose from his crouch. “You’re not going to let me leave,” he said.

“I fear my boss will want to speak with anyone chasing her.”

“Knew better,” he sighed. “Alright, let’s do this before I have to check out of my hotel.”

Her first swipe cut only into nothing as he swiveled around to her back. She feigned left, sweeping her right foot back to catch his ankles.

“Woah, who taught you that?” he demanded, dancing over the attack.

While she paused to process his stunned remark his completely unstunned body cracked his bow against her forehead. She grabbed at his forearm, twisting until it clattered free of his grip. “Quiet, American.”

“Was it Hill?” he carried on. “You with S.H.I.E.L.D?”

Now she faltered and he did not take the opportunity to jam any of his color coordinated arrows into her temple.

“I wasn’t told of another operative here,” he babbled.

She slammed her shoulder into his chest and landed him flat on his ass where she could properly threaten him.

“I’m handling it.”

“This is about as under control as a mouse wrestling a snake.”

“You realize I’m pinning you right,” she demanded, dropping her knees to either side of his hips and pressing the flats of her blades against either of his wrists.

“That means nothing. I’m letting you. Just so you know, they asked me to do your job first. Also, the first and last fight I had with the Widow ended with my jaw dislocated. That was back when I cornered her in Milan. That makes me a mouse too.”

“Sadly, I think that just makes more dinner for the snake instead of an overwhelming force.”

He shrugged his eyebrows and glanced down pointedly. With a sigh she crawled to sit beside him as he grunted and rolled onto his stomach. Hands propped under his head as princess worthy blue eyes fluttered up at her. “Feel better? I think you missed bruising one of my ribs if you wanted a clean sweep.”

“I was going to ask why Fury didn’t tell me you were coming, but pretending you don’t exist does seem to be the only way to deal with your bullshit.”

“Supposed to be super top fucking secret but since you kind of outed me, not cool by the way, want to work together to charm a snake?”

“Is she a spider or a snake, man? Make up your damn mind.”

He rocked back, clutching his knees as a laugh barreled through him. “Oh, I like you. You don’t get a say now. We’re working together. Got something more stealthy than that yellow dress?”

***

She did not give one rat’s ass how he got into her apartment only that he could have possibly blown her cover.

“Brought flowers. Told the doorman I wanted to surprise you.”

“Was the surprise that I had a boyfriend?” she deadpanned as she shrugged off her bulky overcoat.

“Fiancé, when he asks but that’s not why I’m here. I need your help bringing her in. She vanished, shook all my tracking abilities. From what I hear, you’re pretty handy with the underworld system.”

“If you hear anything then I’m doing my job wrong. Why would you want her brought in anyway? Isn’t protocol to take out someone that rouge and dangerous?”

He gave his knees a firm pat before pushing off them to match their heights. “I think she could prove an asset. I made this call. If it goes south, it’s on me. I know I’m asking you to compromise yourself but from what I can tell, the Widow is more involved in mafia’s inner working than the little crew you head. We find her, we get you your hot target too.”

“Ma’am is a pretty cold-hearted bitch from ghost chatter I’ve picked up.”

A tug of his grey hoodie secured it around his face for a safety net just in case anyone was spying in from the dirt smeared window to their right. Sonja was afforded no such luxury because her face was always bared to the world. She was buried way too deep in her world of shit to risk disguises. “Funny. We should work well together.”

“What’s your clearance?” She demanded.

The space of her apartment was deemed worthy of her retailer to host grand parties of up to a dozen people but she already felt stuffy with his confident presence entirely too close to her though he remained clear across the green wallpapered room with his feet twisting into her recently purchased, hand woven rug. It was probably worth three times his ratty boots with its intricate depiction of a fanfare of angels descending the heavens; this man was no angel.

“Alpha.”

“That doesn’t exist. Ten is the highest. I would know, I was the reason they created it.”

A tilt of his head told her he was only amused with her declaration and not in awe like all other inferiors she came across. “Welcome to Alpha then. I’ll fill you in on the plane.”

“I thought you didn’t know where she was.”

“I said she shook me. That doesn’t mean I don’t know her well enough to predict where she would go. Pack light, Budapest can be unforgiving this time of year.”

“Got a name?”

“Got a code, Hawkeye. Yours?”

“Zero.”

***

Being nearly run over three time while crossing a single street was a personal record for Sonja. Hawkeye was weighed down beneath a tan backpack filled with waters, old and clunky laptops, maps, granola bars (as if she could live off of those along), and a very distinct lack of weapons. Hawkeye had insisted on leaving them behind because airport security did not make exceptions for undercover agents and using a private jet would raise too many eyebrows. He had extracted her daggers from her and then held his hand out expectantly for the spares he could not have known she kept tucked neatly between her planner and wallet in her purse. She felt slightly less naked when he tossed his bow as well but still would rather not relying on their combined wit and charm since her partner appeared to be painfully lacking in both and making up for it with 100 proof sarcasm.

The wind buckled with the weight of the dry air it carried and tugged at the ends of Sonja’s hastily dyed and chopped off brunette locks. A sunhat kept the loose waves mashed against her face and even bigger sunglasses kept the prying sun at bay along with Hawkeye��s dancing glances back to make sure she was keeping up with his soundless steps.

“Come on,” he called even though the only closer she could have been to him would be to just piggyback it.

“Where is the safe house again?” she called over the roar of traffic.

He pause while a couple bustled between them, their heads bent in deep conversation then nodded politely to a minister though she doubted his devilish grin could even point out a church. “Next block. You wanna take over bag duty? I’ve got this crick in my neck I haven’t been able to shake since the plane.”

“That’s because you were stupid enough to sleep on the plane. On my shoulder no less. There’s a drool stain.”

The bag was tossed at her chest where her hands caught it without the aid of her gaze leaving his. “If your posture was more slumped we wouldn’t have this problem.”

“Excuse me for remaining vigilant.”

“Trust me, your people don’t know you’re missing yet. You’ve probably got until noon.” His eyes skipped between his blank wrist and the sun overhead to judge the time. “And once we get set up with internet, I will clear the airways of anything we might have left behind. Say, do you think you could give me some sort of reaction? The constant dead expression is a bit intimidating.”

“I can see why the Widow dislocated your jaw, you talk too much.”

She spotted the covert insignia for S.H.I.E.L.D. and pushed past him to key in the day’s number sequence for entrance. There was distinct absence of air conditioning when they entered the stale room sitting on the basement level of what appeared to be the back of a tourist ice cream shop. Hawkeye’s bulky jacket hit the floor then his paisley shirt was tossed over the back of a chair that used to be sand colored but appeared to have been recently stained with globs of red. His back hit the ground as he fiddled with the window unit and Sonja set to toeing along the perimeter of their quarters.

She came across the outlet first sitting adjacent to the Ethernet cable in the far right corner. After depositing the backpack for him to fiddle with later on, she peeled off her overcoat and tank top while she stuck her head into the bathroom to check on the water situation. What trickled from the sink was lukewarm at coldest and the pressure in the shower was laughable but at least the toilet flushed and air freshener hung from the doorknob. Its orange tree shape was swinging in the next moment as blessed air filled the cramped space.

Sonja emerged from the bathroom with her sports bra held away from her damp skin. “Guess you are useful.”

“Do me a favor and check the freezer.” He toed off his boots as he walked, adding more of his shit to the mess that made her fingers twitch to clean only slightly.

“Think they left us frozen dinners? Because you’re health nut bars are not going to cut it Hawk.”

“I’ll order pizza for us,” he called with a wink as he tapped away on the booting up monster of a laptop.

She grumbled her response and pried open the rusted closed freezer doors that concealed an inside that somehow felt hotter than the oven of a city. Two metal cases rested inside, one smaller and snugly sitting atop

“You know how to defuse bombs right?” she called, eyes tracing the otherwise empty white cubicle for any wire or trigger.

“That’s a no. They’re presents from Fury.”

She did not move to take his word for it but instead carefully shifted the boxes sideways while sliding her hand where they sat in case it was weight sensitive. When she felt only the sleek, flat bottom, she cautiously picked up the bottom box from either edge with just the tips of her fingers and walked it as far away from Hawkeye as she could manage.

“For Christ’s sake, Z. I special requested those. Look, the code is 1971 on the bigger one and all zeroes on the other because I’m brilliant. If those don’t work then you can pull out your bomb squad suit.” He strode over, task forgotten, and squatted beside her kneeling form. “I’m not sure whether I’m offended you don’t trust me or flattered you’re trying to keep my out of harm's way.”

She flinched when he keyed in the numbers and passed her the first case carelessly before punching in his own and flipping the lid up to reveal and brand-spanking-new carbon fiber and purple streaked bow.

“Stealthy.” Sonja pulled out her own sleek new dagger set. Four blades so sharp just the skimming of her fingers drew their first blood. “Gorgeous.”

“I’m going to assume both of those were for me. Look, since I slept earlier, you take this round and I’ll wake you when night says it's time to move.”

When she made no move to do as such, he groaned and jutted out his hand. “Clint,” he said.

“What,” she snapped.

“That’s my name. Clint Barton. 1971 is the year I was born.”

“Is this supposed to make me trust you?”

“What? You want my social security number? Passport? Birth certificate? To be honest, I have so many of those I probably couldn’t pinpoint the original for you.”

She glanced down to hide the smiled curving up her lips and tucked a single dagger into her calf high sock. After refolding the hem of her khaki shorts, she felt composed enough to meet his impatient blue eyes. His smile was quick and brilliant and caught her so off guard she returned it, still vulnerable from the previous moments.

“There she is. Listen miss bomb technician, that why they call you zero? Because of the countdown? Anyway, if you don’t sleep you risk both our asses tonight and I happen to have a fine ass. As a gentleman I have not checked yours out but I am willing to bet that it’s at least half as good as mine.”

“If I go to sleep will you shut up?”

He touched his scarred knuckles against her cheek and lugged his new toys over to the ancient ones where he set up shop for the next few hours. The flimsy mattress with springs poking out every few inches was tucked away between the window and the front door and Sonja barely got her coat down on it before her head crashed against her arm for her pillow and her eyes tapped out.

***

do svidaniya

Clint’s version of a gentle awakening was a kick to her foot as he passed by. Of course, her leg swept out in defense and he landed face first on the mattress beside her. Her groggy eyes blinked open at him and promptly scowled at the dumbfounded expressions holding even his usual smart ass comment at bay.

“We better be under attack,” she grumbled, failing when she attempted to remove her already asleep arm from beneath his heavy torso.

It took him an alarming number of seconds to compose an answer and she squinted through sleep crust to glare at him. His lips parted then apparently he discovered them too dry to speak because his tongue swept out and at this proximity, so close she would not even have to reach to strangle him, the smell of his lingering bubblegum toothpaste pulled her fully into reality.

The same abrupt force that stilled him froze her from shoving him off the bed. She blamed the dreams still singing to her but the more likely cause was his hand which had by the damnation of some god landed on the dip of her waist, not her ass or her breast, which would be far simpler to explain the skip in her chest.

His recovery was like watching a runner recover from a particularly nasty hurdle “Afraid your mafia is running a little behind schedule, so we have to go out and meet them. Gear up.”

He grunted when her knee sent him rolling to the floor next.

“What time is it, Hawk?”

“2100. Think you bruised my bladder.”

Her change of clothes were swept up and the bathroom door slammed between them and the meager form of water she coaxed from the sink drowned out the breath she heaved from her lungs. The woman staring back at her was faded and spotted where the mirror was tarnished from the years without maintenance.

There was scarcely enough time to worry about saving her own skin let alone playing guess that hormone with an archer she met two days ago. A quick coaching session of her emotions and the addition of a black beanie, matching under armor shirt, and a lightweight bullet proof vest she emerged, undoing the button to her shorts after regretfully noticing the absence of the last bit of her uniform.

Clint lounged in front of the air unit in identical gear, hands folded across his pulled in knees so that the muscles fought against the fabric of his shirt. “Didn’t know pants were optional,” he called as she neatly folded her shorts beside their supply bag and produced the cargo pants that would be hiding her weapons for the evening. “I did appreciate that silky number you wore for me on our first mission,” he continued.

A belt secured the bottoms and after shoving her feet into the boots she stomped one down dangerously close to his most vulnerable bits and offered a sweet smile down at him.

“Think the world has one too many eunuchs as it is. Next time you want me to tie your laces try a nice ‘Clinton, would you be a dear and tie my fucking shoes?’”

“Don’t I feel like Cinderella?”

Deft fingers made quick work of her laces and she was still admiring the knots she could not even begin worrying about how to undo when he stood and shouldered his bow.

“Let’s go catch a spider, Z.”

“Let’s take down the Samarian crew as well while we’re at it.”

The night was their friend, lending its heaviest cloud cover from the stars that dared shine from the moonless sky as they jogged through the still bustling city’s alleys.

They passed a meat truck making a last minute delivery and Clint offered the driver the nod of his head before prodding Sonja’s body to pick up the speed as if they were out for a jog instead of on the tracks of the most dangerous woman on any side of the world. She shifted out of his reach, none too content on having her mind replay its earlier clash with emotions for the rest of the mission.

The building where Clint’s found surveillance footage last picked up her image was tucked between the river and the last wall of structures. A fishing shack where Sonja doubted the lights from the horn riddled bridge now stretching over their heads could penetrate if a paid professional like herself were taking shelter there.

Rounding the last bend on the downward slanting street, Clint caught her belt loop and pulled her against the crumbling brick building that smelled like moss and moldy bread. She bent her knees to keep from slipping down the slope on the loose cobblestones beneath their feet and still managed to subtly maneuver further from him because his aftershave was making repeating the plan like a mantra in her head a thing for the birds.

“Hey, you with me, Zero? You remember what we talked about?”

“Not dying or the not fucking up part?”

“See, I knew you weren’t listening to me.”

“Relax, Hawk. I’ve been doing this since I was toddling.”

“Really? Diapers for me.”

She swatted his arm when his blue eyes danced with humor and closed her own to reel herself back in.

“Seriously, though, you up for this? Because I can go in alone…”

“Like, hell, Hawk. You’re long range, I distract. Stick to it.”

He held out his knuckles wrapped in fingerless gloves that would help his aim. With a laugh disguised as a groan, she knocked hers against his and watched as he began scaling the fire escape to the tops of the connected houses leading to the perfect vantage point.

It took the coaxing of the restless waves to remind her that she too did not have the fortune of sitting still and allowing her already spiraling life to make Budapest its final resting place.

The traps took precious time to pick out--a motion detector from the front porch, a snoring dog with paws running in the air when she slipped around to the side, an electrical ward along the single sealed window, and finally a good old fashioned set of cans on the roof she managed to climb on. Sonja crouched on the narrow ledge of the none-too-secure roofing tiles, still off balance from her misjudged landing.

The cans, a mix of unopened green peas for which Sonja could not blame her and chili whose lids appeared to have been ripped off by bare hands, were stacks to at least twice her height and made a perfect circle around what she had to assume was another vulnerable entrance. From her original distance of spotting from the bridge with Clint, it had appeared merely another level of the shack which she could scale but now was proving to be just a pain in her ass. She circled on feet quieter than death to the side where Clint could see her and held out her hands helplessly.

“No in?” He said over the ear piece.

A shake of her head was the answer she knew his strapped on night goggles could pick up.

“Alright, hold on.”

“Clint!” she hissed out as an idea struck.

“Hell of a time to break out the Christian name.”

“Knock out the electricity on window.”

“I know you remember how these sonic arrows work. Our communication will be cut off and I know you’ll miss this sweet watchful voice, Z.”

“Sonja,” she whispered, hunching down on her knees and throwing a finger down as if he did not know the window she intended.

“No, sonic.”

“That’s my name you moron. You’ve got to trust me. Just shoot it.”

There was that hesitation from him again, she was beginning to understand how his head worked. The job was simple, something he was trained beyond reason for, but she was a variable he had to carefully calculate into the equation.

“Alright. I’m right behind you.”

“I know. Just don’t miss.”

She heard the smile in his response, “I find your lack of faith disturbing.”

“Are we really resorting to quoting Star Wars right now?”

“Fire in the hole, Sonja.”

The arrow struck home with a muted thwack and Sonja slid down onto the windowsill throwing a thumbs up into the now unresponsive night as she jimmied her dagger around to unlock the window. A second blade joined her free hand when she ducked inside.

The first thing she noticed was the complete lack of interior decoration just like their own safe house and the second unfortunately was that the insides were also void of any inhabitants. Why so much security without anything to protect?

There was a knock at the front door and a moment later Sonja remembered the power surge would also have affected the motion detector. She wearily trudged over before sliding into a defensive position when she flung the door back.

She saw the Black Widow first and her arrogant smirk followed by the prompting of an arrow to her skull.

“Plan B then?” Sonja called as Clint jostled their target into the room.

“I thought we agreed this was the more likely alternative,” he said. “Making it plan A.”

Sonja shrugged and pulled the handcuffs from her calf pocket before moving to snap them securely around the Widow’s ankles. The woman grunted as a green glow filled the room and a shift of her hips proved her unable of even lifting her feet.

When Sonja straightened and reached to tuck a stray strand of hair back into her braid, the woman finally spoke. “Props.” she said.

“Thanks, we’ve been practicing that last bit for hours now. I was really worried about the execution.” Clint strolled around to the front of their captive, pockets bulging with confiscated weapons.

“Not you, Barton. I knew you were on my ass for months. Her I wasn’t even looking for.”

Sonja crossed her arms. “Case. Point. What’s your real name?”

“Natasha Romanov.”

The plain reply jarred both her and her partner equally and Clint took her arm, walking her as far back into the room as he could manage before inclining his forehead to make the whisper easier hear. “She’s going to try to play a game with us. Anyone around her is instantly compromised. I need you to stay with me.”

A sharp nod answered him and his grin danced with mischief as he swung back around to stroll over to Natasha with his bow forgotten and swinging in his left hand. Sonja did not even feign relaxation but rubbed her thumbs over the sweating hilts of her daggers.

“This about the Avengers initiative? I read all about it last week,” Natasha said.

“You know it is. That’s why you let us capture you.”

“Let?” Sonja’s arms slipped from their protective frame.

Clint pushed on, feigning deafness when Sonja knew good and well his hearing aids were in. “You’ve got a nasty ledger and S.H.I.E.L.D. only wants to help you rectify it through the Avengers.”

“Avengers?” Sonja questioned.

“I’m fine where I am,” Natasha retorted giving the glowing shackles weighing down her feet a good tug and only ending up on her knees which, despite the powerless position, she somehow conveyed was right where she wanted to be.

Clint sighed and dropped as well. “You’re fine painting every city you go to with blood for people you don’t even know? The Avengers are going to protect the world and we want you to be a part of that.”

“Cute speech. Did Sonja feed it to you? You’re not bright enough to try the emotion ploy.”

Sonja was too busy puzzling how she knew her name to reply. That’s when the first bullet cut through the air and buried itself clean in Clint’s left calf. When he keeled forward in pain, Natasha swiped the gun tucked into the back of his belt and began firing to cover all their asses.

Lurching forward, Sonja kicked the door shut and pried her pistol from her belt as her back smacked against the wall. “Clint!” she called when he finally lifted himself from the ground.

“You led the Samarians here!” Natasha shouted as bullets pelted the door and walls relentlessly.

“Whoops,” Clint managed.

“Damn right you’re gonna need my help with the Avengers if you can’t even manage to stay off their radar. I assume you at least had an escape route in place.”

Clint wiped his bloody hand off on his shirt and primed an arrow for release should their defenses be breached by the crew. “Boat out back.”

“You’re gonna have to uncuff me.” Natasha called, firing precisely through an already fragile portion of the wall to produce a thunk of dead weight only a few yard away.

The deadly accuracy made Clint hesitate as he added in yet another variable, but Sonja just tossed the keys without a word and returned to keeping her gun aimed at the door.

“Barton go first and we’ll cover you,” Natasha called as she dodged a bullet cutting entirely too close to her brain. When she sat up straight again a line of red across her forehead added to her already flaming hair and scarlet pjs look.

Clint’s gaze snapped to Sonja unwavering in its unspoken question: would she be ok alone?

“Get out of here, Hawkeye,” she added the last bit to help him depersonalize, to remind him this was just a mission and all lives involved were expendable. “I’m right behind you,” she continued when he did not move.

His mouth curved up as he heaved himself onto mostly steady feet and sprinted to the backdoor while Sonja and Natasha laid down cover fire until both were down a clip. “Together?” Natasha called.

“Hell, why not?”

Sonja leapt up first, followed shortly by the much faster woman. The night air was thick with humidity that only pooled more sweat on their skin. On the free side of the house, a man screamed as the now awakened guard dog set to work. The other side was occluded by the closely stacks buildings and on the water just ahead, Clint revved the waiting engine of the speed boat.

Natasha waded into the water and slung her leg over the side, hauling herself on board in one fluid motion. Sonja had time to see her eyes go wide before she heard the other female voice cut through the night, “Chief!”

A sword was leveled at her instead of a gun and Sonja had the absolute pleasure of facing her old boss when she turned around. “Ma’am,” she replied without a trace of emotion.

She heard the cock of Natasha’s gun along with the wiry draw of Clint’s bow and briefly wondered if he could even keep his hands steady at the moment due to the blood loss.

“Or is it Agent Zero now?”

“Whatever you prefer, Ma’am.”

“Shall we settle this like the duals of old or has all your honor gone through the window with the american?”

Sonja heard Natasha grumble about being ignored as she tucked her gun into her pocket and produced a dagger. The other hand reached for her back pocket slower all the while keeping her opponent's gaze fixed on her words. Ma’am’s bulky henchmen fanned out behind her patiently waiting to be allowed to have some fun with the traitor and spy.

“What can I say? He brought presents.”

She waited the appropriate ten seconds for the meaning behind her words to smash into Clint before she pulled the pin. The homemade grenade sailed from her hand while her body was flung in the other direction. Her side slammed into the boat and Natasha just managed to get a drip on her belt before Clint slammed the throttle into its highest gear. He was ducked on the floor by the steering console for safety just as Natasha had thrown herself beneath the low walls at Clint’s advisement.

“When did you even have time to make that?” he demanded, driving blindly down the wide river.

“You’re the one who apparently knows everything,” she snapped.

“Christ, I’m sorry, alright. You weren’t cleared to know.” He paused then turned to her while Natasha huffed and took over driving. “Zero failed missions?”

“Guess again.”

“Zero like you were the original?”

“You’re not cleared, asshole.”

***

Natasha made airports her bitch with the new fresh faced S.H.I.E.L.D recruits scurrying behind her toting her luggage and a flight attendant rushing to retrieve her properly iced water. She shot Sonja a lazy wink but the other woman was too busy scowling away any potential disturbances to do anything other than reshoulder her backpack.

Clint took the lead, his reputation sending the herd of freshmen scattering in his wake of glory. Sonja quickened her steps, determined to talk to him now that the paramedics aboard their evac copter were no longer shooting him full of drugs.

“You’re not careless,” she said once she matched long legs to his abrupt stride.

“Think Nat will make them carry her?” he mused, wincing when he stopped focusing on his uneven gait.

Sonja caught under his arm and he glanced over through sleep deprived blue eyes and the tangles his cropped hair had somehow managed to tie itself into. “You gonna make me carry you?” she countered.

“I’ve got it.”

The usual airport crowd of proud mothers, blubbering fathers, and excitable kids ready to go off and make lives for themselves meandered past them. Sonja wondered what life awaited her back at S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters.

“I was born there, you know. S.H.I.E.L.D that is. Born and raised. I don’t exist to our government because S.H.I.E.L.D doesn’t. I’m nothing, I’m just zero.”

“I let the Samarians follow us,” he admitted in the breath after she finished her confession.

“I know. You’re not careless. You needed a common enemy for us to get Romanov on our side.”

“I was going to apologize for ruining your original mission, but I think all of earth takes precedence. We wouldn’t have made it out of there if not for you.”

“Taking out Ma’am was my mission Clint. Yesterday was the first time I saw her in person. I spent years working my way up through the ranks only to figure out I would only ever be important to her when I betrayed her.”

“You’re welcome, then.” He leaned in when he sang it and she gave his face a shove away as they exited the building through sliding glass doors and reached a junction in the sidewalk where she would climb into the car that would carry her home and he would get in his rental and drive out to his next mission.

“How long has it been since you’ve been stateside?”

“Just four years. I haven’t been home since I was a teenager, though when I completed my training.”

“You don’t have to face those bastards, you know. I’ve got something involving lightning and a hammer waiting for me. Could use some backup I trust.”

“Sounds alpha level. I’ll leave you to it.”

He nodded, shifting his weight off his bad leg and closing the humming space between their bodies just enough for her to notice it was deliberate. Her hand shifted under the strap of her bag while she toed at some bits of loose gravel beneath her sneakers.

“Guess this is goodbye, then. Keep an eye on Nat for me, will you? She respects you.”

“Only because she was comparing me to you.”

His mouth pulled up in a smile she had grown all too accustomed to seeing regularly and had truthfully taken for granted now that he was leaving. The civil term of closer inspection crossed her mind as she leaned in further still followed by the embarrassing real word she had been searching for--a kiss.

She could not even recall the last time she had kissed someone without an ulterior motive. She expected him to politely return it or to laugh and tell her to collect herself, not for him to bite her lip and slide his lips between hers like the whole damn earth might spin off course if he did not. His hands were soft in her hair and his hand slid down tracing over her cheek so that his fingers replaced his lips when he reluctantly pulled away.

“Put a pin in that, Sonja?”

“You mean like when I pinned you? Or what I pulled the pin on the grenade?”

“No explosions and no more beating me up.” He punctuated his sentence with a rushed kiss to her forehead. “Unless we can twist those into kinky things.”

“Oh, it’s possible,” Natasha called as she strolled past and climbed into the waiting black SUV.

Sonja gave his chest a push and took two controlled steps backwards simply because if she didn’t there was no guarantee either of them would be setting out on their respective journeys today.

“Goodbye,” Sonja said.

With a wink that sent her spiraling higher than the pyres of Moscow’s finest cathedrals Clint Barton was gone.

#clint barton #clint barton fanfiction #clint barton smut #clint barton x reader #clint x reader #hawkeye #Avengers #avengers headcanon #avengers smut #avengers imagine #avengers drabble

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afewmarvelousthoughts · 5 years

Text

Stay Ch. 19

Master: @afewmarvelousthoughtsadmin

Pairing: Natasha X Reader (Female)

Summary: You have a gift, the ability to see other people’s innermost secrets. For years you used it to gather intel for the highest bidder when you take on The Widow. After she becomes more than a mark the two of you spend years stealing moments. Post snap you wait in your designated meeting place, look back on the sordid past you share with the woman you love and hope against everything that she’s still alive.

Warnings: A little violence (kinda) and a lot of feelings

A/N: HOLY SHIT I AM SO SORRY! I had no intention for this to take over a fucking month. But Endgame fucked me up so hard (in the best way, I think I earned those hurts with the shit I write here lol) and just life, in general, has been NUTS (also in a really good way).

I honestly cannot thank you all enough for being so goddamn patient and supportive while you waited for this chapter. Some folks have to deal with really demanding and dickish followers but I’m over here getting asks and DMs of y’all wishing me well and shit. HOW AM I THIS LUCKY?!

I hope y’all like this one.

Tags are open!

Post Snap: Wakanda

Shock settles cold and heavy over Natasha’s shoulders.

Her gaze has been on the blank screen of her phone for an unknown amount of time. She’d tried to call… but all communication had been cut off, Wakanda locking itself away… A knock from the door behind her causes her to jump, sending the phone clattering to the floor.

“Sorry,” Bruce’s tone is cautious. “The jets almost ready.” They needed to get home… She knows people need them but…

“I can’t.”

“Nat… we have to-”

“No. I have to find her Bruce…”

There’s pity in his eyes, “Natasha… the odds…”

“Go,” Steve’s voice comes from the hall, rough and low. She steps out holding his haunted expression. A set of keys sail in her direction, “There’s a bike you can take outside…” Steve pauses, taking a shaky breath before continuing, “Outside Bucky’s place.”

A touch of warmth fills her chest. He already knew what she’d need to do. Her fingers curl around the keys. “Thank you.”

The moment she’s outside of Wakanda’s protective barrier she tries to check for the message… still, she can’t get through…

A scream threatens to rip her apart. She may be able to make it through the end of the goddamn world… through watching members of her small family fall to ash… But she would not survive losing you… not again.

October 2009

“Fuck!” Natasha bellows slamming her fist against the wall.

Months of searching… this had been their last lead. It came up empty. She was supposed to be the best and yet she couldn’t find and save the one person she cared the most for… not even with the resources and blessing of S.H.I.E.L.D…

They’d given her everything she could need. Everyone from Secretary Pierce to Fury throwing their weight behind this, pulling strings no one would even fathom pulling with governments and low lives alike and still not a sign of you. It was as if you’d simply disappeared.

“I’m sorry, Nat…” Clint lays a comforting hand on her shoulder, she shrugs him off.

“We missed something. There’s gotta be… something…” her voice cracks as he takes her by the shoulders.

His sad eyes break something in her, “There’s not, Natasha. She’s… she’s gone.”

“No,” her voice is thick with restrained tears. “She wouldn’t-”

He shakes his head, “I don’t… I don’t think it was a choice… But someone…” Nat shakes her head like a child denying a very obvious truth.

“Clint-” A sob slips out before she can catch it.

He tugs her into his arms, crushing her against his chest. “I’m so sorry.”

That’s it. A guttural sob rips from the deepest parts of her being and her knees give way sending them both to the floor. All she can think is how you’d feel this emotion with her, how you’d understand everything without her having to speak a word…

Slowly her sorrow is replaced with a cold rage. Someone took you from her. They likely caught wind that you’d turned your services over to S.H.I.E.L.D. and thinking you’d give something away… They couldn’t even leave her a body, couldn’t even give you dignity in death.

“We’ll figure out who did this, Natasha.” Clint may not be you but he knew her well enough to read her. “We will.”

Of that, she had no doubt.

They never did though…

Fury assigned her to Stark because she was best suited but also because he felt the distraction of deep cover would help. It may have but… Being Natalie Rushman reminded her of your night in Tokyo… There was nothing she could do to escape your memory.

Thankfully it hadn’t lasted long. In less than a year she was back to just being Natasha, back to the Widow, working every job she could. The more exhausted she was the less she felt how hollow she was. The more her body ached the less she missed your touch.

When she stared down a horde of alien invaders she thought that just maybe this was it. She’d go out fighting and save some people in the process. If there was another side well, she hoped you’d be there waiting.

But it wasn’t the end. Somehow they’d pulled off the impossible.

By that point, almost five years had passed. Natasha still missed you on a level that felt impossible to truly convey. But there were days that the ache was less than it had ever been. It wasn’t moving on per-say but it was something like healing.

At the very least now she had the distraction of Steve. She could make him a project. She’d never have the life or happiness she wanted but maybe she could help him find his footing. Maybe one of them could have a chance at happiness, at a life.

There was something she related to in his detachment. She supposed the loss of just about everyone and everything a person knew could be similar to the void you left. So many times she thought of telling him about you, hoping that he’d feel less alone in his pain but… He was a man from the ’40s… She wasn’t willing to risk losing a friend over dated prejudices.

Turned out she should have given Steve Rogers more credit.

When she heard the ballistics on the bullet that killed Fury her blood ran cold. It was him…

So many things had crossed her mind then. Not a single one of them had been that somehow she’d find you because of this.

She’d been so wrapped up in the aftermath of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s demise that she didn’t have time to look at the files she’d released. Thankfully Clint had her back and had been scanning them the moment they’d hit the web.

Just after she’d settled into the tower he showed up looking like he’d seen a ghost.

Fear gripped her. Had she exposed Laura and the kids in her haste to topple Hydra… had she sacrificed everything-

“I found her.”

For a minute the words rang hollow and meaningless.

“Found who?” Steve asked from his spot on her couch.

Clint said nothing, just held her gaze until his shot inevitably hit its target. “I think she’s alive, Nat.” He hands you a file.

With trembling hands, she turns the pages. Scarcely breathing. Steve says something but Clint hushes him.

As the words on the pages soak in she thinks she may vomit. Experiments, tests, torture… kill missions… Riots you’d incited at their command, dignitaries dropping from what appeared to be brain aneurisms. Little subtle things she should have looked for and then the last report… February 2014… nine months prior.

Natasha’s knees give out and she hits the hardwood with a thud. They’d had you for five years… Her breath stills.

No.

“Natasha!” Clint kneels in front of her, Steve stands at the ready behind him.

Pieces rapidly click into place. All the subtle ties to Hydra since the very moment the two of you met and they meant one thing. My fault. All my fault. They wouldn’t have gotten to you if it weren’t for her. You wouldn’t have let your guard down. You wouldn’t have trusted S.H.I.E.L.D. You’d had a feeling about them from the start but she’d been convinced you were just being overly cautious.

“Nat…”

A raspy breath sucks into her lungs so fast it almost hurts. “I did this.” She breathes out.

“No. No, you fucking did not.” Clint grabs her shoulders, shaking her.

“I did. She wouldn’t-”

“If you don’t shut the fuck up with that I’ll slap you,” she sees Steve shift in the background. “You didn’t do this. They did this and we will get Y/N back.” She says nothing, just stares at a hair on Clint’s shirt, numb. “Do you hear me, Natasha?!”

Slowly her eyes meet his. “Do you hear me?” His tone level now.

“Yeah,” weakly she nods.

This was the last base that could possibly be hiding you. The last little flickering ember of hope. With cell after cell empty or filled with rotting bodies, that ember was fading quickly.

Natasha thought when the inevitable realization that you were gone hit her she’d go mad. Screaming, tearing her hair, the full Linda Blair. Instead, she feels… nothing. Not the calm detachment she’s used to but a nothingness so deep she wonders if it’s actually what death feels like.

“Natasha,” Sam’s voice crackles in her comm, “one floor down from you, south side. We think we got her.”

Tingles creep up her spine, feeling electric against her scalp. She won’t believe it. Won’t hope. All Sam and Steve had to go off of were old photos… Who knew what they’d done to you… Natasha ran faster than she ever had in her entire life. The slightest chance that you could be alive was all it took to drive her forward.

Honey. That’s all she wanted to hear in your rich accent. “Please,” she breathes out to anything that would hear her as she sprints down the hall toward where the guys waited. “Please give me her.”

“Where!?” They’re standing before a glass wall and part as if on cue.

The figure slumped on the floor beyond the glass isn’t the woman she remembers. There are bones where once ample curves had been, supple skin replaced with dull bruised flesh, thick hair traded for thin scraggly locks, pink lips for cracked grey things. Honestly, she couldn’t even tell if the person in there was alive.

A small sound ekes from Natasha’s mouth before her hand can fly to cover it. Why had she dared to hope?

Clint’s warm hand settles on her back. She doesn’t know when he arrived or how long she’s been staring. “That’s her, Nat…” He says it like she really doesn’t know like you aren’t a part of her very soul. She’d know you… she’d always know you. But were you-

Your head rolls on your shoulders, a groan sounding through unseen speakers. Natasha’s breath stops. -Alive.

“Hey,” your voice is cracked, low, and hoarse but still… it really is you. Clint grabs her hand tight. “How about you pieces of shit bring me some water?”

Still very you. Unable to wait a second longer she rushes to the door. Desperately she tugs at the handle, clearly locked.

“Rogers, a little help?!”

“Are you sure Nat? We don’t know if-”

“If. I know that if you don’t help me open this door I will break your super-powered body in ways you can’t even imagine.” Every word drips with conviction.

Steve holds up his hands in surrender. With a swift tug and a touch of effort, he pries the door open.

Your head rolls in the direction of the door, “About fuckin’ time. Was beginning to think y’all were just gonna-”

Eyes Natasha has missed for far too long fly wide open. Instead of the joy and love, she was hoping to see, terror floods your features.

“No,” your voice is barely a whisper. “God no please, no.” You bury your face in your knees, covering your ears with your hands, “I’ll do anything you want… don’t make me do this, not again, please. No.” Your body trembles, rocking back and forth.

Natasha doesn’t even hear Steve and Clint warn her to hold back as she kneels before you, tugging your hands from your head. Caution a long forgotten skill. This is you. You need her.

“Baby, it’s me. It’s ok. Look at me, feel-”

“Don’t, please don’t.” Your head shakes back and forth, “They lied, whatever they promised you is a lie. You won’t win, just go. Go. I can’t… I-”

“Y/N,” she tilts your chin up. Red rimmed, fearful eyes, gaze at her. “It’s me.”

“No. Leave, they’re gonna make me… just go. Go now. Tell ‘em I’ll do whatever it is, just leave… please… don’t make me do this…”

She shakes her head, “Do what? Baby, I-”

“Go!” You roar. Behind the word is something else. A force so strong it knocks the wind from Natasha’s chest. “Get out!”

She can’t breathe, her heart begins to trip over itself. Panic, terror, pain, all combine making her brain misfire in every direction. A low keening rises from you, with the sound the emotions become more and more pronounced. Natasha can’t even reach her concern for you anymore, there’s only this, this inescapable feeling of pure fear. Curling into a ball she tries to focus.

Slowly you rise, looking down at her. When her eyes meet yours she’s struck by how black they are, the pupils so huge they seem to take up more space than your irises ever did. They look… inhuman. For a second it quells the suffocating fear.

“Please…” Desperately Natasha reaches up for you, silently begging you to know her, all of her, in that way only you can. Instead, your hand slowly lowers, aimed for her head.

This is fine, Nat thinks, eyes closing. Strangely, she’s at peace with the thought that if she died here, by your hand, at least then you’d feel her, know she came for you even if she was too late.

The distinct crackling of electricity followed by a thud beside her meets her ears. Breath begins to fill her chest as her heart slows. Something happened to you… A new sense of panic breaks her from the stupor she’d fallen into.

You’re unconscious, one of Clint’s shock arrows stuck to your back. Vaguely, Natasha is aware of the shuffling feet near the door. Someone grabs her shoulders. Logically, she knows they’re helping her up but she isn’t operating on logic. Without thought, she blindly lunges at this faceless person. Flesh contacting flesh with an effective smack.

Ignoring everything and everyone else she crawls to you ripping the arrow off your limp body tugging you into her arms. With every ounce of strength, she has she clutches your back to her chest. Your head lolls on her shoulder as she presses a kiss to your forehead.

“I’ve got you,” Natasha whispers against your skin. “I’ve got you. It’s ok. It’s gonna be ok. You’re gonna be ok, baby.” Tears burn the backs of her eyes, pricking like a thousand needles. She refuses to allow them to fall. Tears won’t help you.

“Nat?” Clint’s voice is level like he’s speaking to one of the kids. “Nat, we need to get her some help. Will you let us do that?”

Clarity dawns. Her eyes scan the room to find Steve rubbing his neck. It was Steve who she’d lashed out at. “St… Steve?”

“I’m ok,” his smile is weak but he’s sincere. “Will you let me carry her?”

The thought of letting you go… but Clint was right. Your skin feels clammy, your breath shallow… scarily so… Natasha nods and he cautiously approaches, not wanting another fist to the throat.

Steve lifts you from her arms like you weigh nothing. Despite his bulk, he’s so gentle, ensuring you’re supported properly. Clint and Sam flank her, making sure she’s steady on her feet before trekking to the jet.

Immediately Sam begins hooking you up to oxygen and a saline drip. He says something about your oxygen levels and heart rate that doesn’t sink in. All Natasha can do is stare at you, horrified and amazed in equal measure that somehow you’re back with her. Somehow after all these years, she has you again.

“This isn’t fucking necessary, Tony!” Natasha shakes with rage.

“I think all present parties would disagree.”

Her eyes desperately scan the room for backup but even Clint averts his gaze.

“I don’t know if you blacked out back there but all of us damn near flipped shit when your girl in there did. She’s a bomb and we have no idea what the trip wire is. Until we know exactly what’s going on we need to control the environment she’s in.” Tony collapses in a chair, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

“I don’t like it either, Nat but he’s right. We have to play it safe. For her sake as much as ours.” Clint looks so tired…

She shakes her head, “She… she won’t know she’s safe… that-” I’m here… Natasha can’t finish the statement though because she knows that’s part of the point. Seeing her had set you off.

“We’re gonna have to keep her partially sedated for at least a few days anyway, Nat.” Sam offers a half smile when she glares at him. “The withdraws from whatever they had her on will be rough, it’d be cruel to keep her fully conscious while she goes through the first part of them. She’ll come to slowly so the change doesn’t shock her.”

She knows Sam’s right. They’d had you on some sick mix of heroin and other chemicals for longer than they knew. It was the perfect combination to keep you desperate and pliable without harming your mind, leaving you an effective weapon for them.

But when she looks at your unconscious form through the view screen she just wants to hold you. Truly it feels as though her whole body is aching to wrap around yours. She wants to be the first thing you see when you wake up but… they took that from you both.

Sam wraps an arm around her shoulders, “I’ll make sure she knows she’s safe, Natasha. Promise.”

Post Snap

The rain had slowed but that only meant that cold could settle in. That kind of cold that makes your insides ache.

You can’t bring yourself to move, all you can do is focus on the pain and what it reminded you of…

November 2014

Your whole body throbbed with pain. A deep, aching, hungry kind of pain. It was familiar but you weren’t certain of it until your stomach clenched.

Without ceremony, you lean over the side of the bed and heave, nothing but bile burning up your dry throat.

After you refused to kill the woman they sent you should have known they’d do this. It never took very long for withdrawal to set in and the last time it had been enough to break you… They’d send her in soon enough… And Natasha’s face or not you were fairly certain you’d end her life if it meant stopping the pain.

Anyway, it wasn’t Natasha… Hell, sometimes you wondered if there ever was a Natasha. Maybe your brain, in hopes of surviving, crafted some fantasy to comfort you…

You heave again, abdominal muscles screaming from the effort. “Fuck,” you groan, wiping your cracked lips on your arm.

It’s not until you collapse back into the bed that you realize you’re in a different cell, and this bed… well, it’s possibly the most comfortable thing you’ve felt in years. Interesting tactic for them to take.

The door opens cautiously. A dry laugh tumbles from you. Even if you wanted to attack whoever was on the other side you don’t have it in you. It’s strange though, caution isn’t usually their style.

Slowly a man with a kind smile comes into focus, a tray in his hands. He’s not in uniform, just plain street clothes. Your head cocks to the side, trying to put these pieces in place.

“Hey, thought you may want something on your stomach. Better than heaving up nothing.”

You say nothing, eyes narrowing. Focus, Y/N. Read him, come on. But your brain isn’t in the mood to obey you.

As he approaches, instinctively you curl into yourself. Thoughts of other men, other cells, flash rapidly through your mind setting your heart to thundering. The familiar feeling of your chest splitting open begins but you fight to maintain control. If they thought you attacked him…

The man clears his throat shaking his head a bit as if to fend off a fly. “I’m not going to hurt you.” Slowly he sets the tray of food at the end of the bed. “You can tell if I’m lying right?”

He extends a hand just close enough for you to reach. For a long moment, you just stare at it, confused, trying to work out what the trap here is. It’s always something there’s always something. But maybe if you played along they’d give you want you needed to make the aching stop. Fuck, you just want it to stop.

Hesitantly you let your fingers graze the back of his hand.

Quick as though you touched a hot stove you withdraw. Bad idea. You couldn’t control it. So many images tumble in your mind. Faces, names, voices. A small sound comes from you as your hands grasp your head, trying to keep it from flying apart.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Are you ok? Can you open your eyes?” Sam, his name was Sam, is kneeling beside the bed looking up at you with earnest eyes.

Slowly things come back into focus and you know one thing for certain. He’s not lying to you. This Sam, whoever he may be, does want to help you. You don’t trust him, he could be being used, but it’s been a long time since someone was near you that didn’t mean you harm.

“I… it was too much at once…” Your body relaxes a touch, “Thank you, Sam.”

There’s that familiar flash of surprise before he responds, “Wanna tell me your name?”

“Y/N.”

“Good to meet you,” his smile is true. “Think you can eat something?” Blankly you stare at the trey, the thought of eating making your abdomen clench. “If you can eat a bit I can give you something that’ll help with the pain.”

Saltine crackers had never looked so appealing and horrifying all at once. Taking a deep breath you scoot down the bed and pick one up with a shaky hand.

The salt explodes on your tongue as though it’s the best thing you’ve ever tasted. Your stomach growls demanding more. In an instant you’re reaching for another cracker.

“Take it slow,” Sam smiles brightly as he pulls up a chair close enough to be personable but not uncomfortable. “If you’re feeling hungry that’s a good sign. Means your system is getting closer to being clear.”

“What’d they have me on?” You ask before taking a deep drink of water.

A muscle in his jaw ticks, “It was a cocktail. An addictive one.”

You didn’t really need the details, nor did you want them in all honesty. Knowing wouldn’t change anything. One thing you did want to know…

“Where am I?”

Sam holds your gaze, clearly weighing his response carefully. “Somewhere safe.”

“That’s a shit answer.” Your hands shake as you sip the oversized mug of broth. It’s hot and stings your chapped lips a bit but you nearly groan from the taste.

“True.” He leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “You’re in New York. With people who want to help you. Can that be enough for now?” His sincerity hits you, a warm wave of emotion, unlike anything you’ve felt in so long.

You’re too tired to fight, “For now.” The half-empty mug clatters to the trey as it slips from your hands. Mindlessly you itch at your arms, every nerve feels like it’s tingling, almost enough to drive you crazy.

Sam stands, crossing the room. Your eyes follow him as he places his thumb on a pad causing a small door to open. “This will help that.” He holds up a vile and syringe.

Fear chills your over-warm body instantly. However, your eyes light on your arms, scratch marks red and irritated, and despite the food, everything still hurts… badly. Plus, who gave a fuck what you wanted. He may be kind but you were still in a cell, still a prisoner.

Habitually you hold your arms out. With a gentle touch, he grips your wrist, locating a non-ruined vein and injects whatever new concoction these helpful people have for you.

As it works its way through your blood the aching does quiet some, your nerves stop their incessant tingling. A deep sigh escapes you. Whatever it was it felt good. You’re not sure if it’s the drugs, the food, or just soul-deep exhaustion but your eyes flutter and you sway.

“Here,” Sam grips your shoulders, guiding you to the plush pillows. Suddenly you see a flash from him.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper.

“For what?” Through your half-lidded eyes, you see his confused expression and feel just a touch of fear.

“Your friend. Riley. I’m sorry.”

He looks away, clearing his throat. “Thanks.” When he looks back his eyes are glassy, “Get some rest, Y/N. I’ll check back in on you soon.”

It had been six… no seven days… They blurred together into one purgatorial haze.

Natasha hadn’t left the observation room off your cell the entire time. Sleeping on a cot next to the viewscreen just to feel closer to you… when she slept that was. But after Sam had assured her that his exchange with you earlier was an excellent sign she couldn’t seem to keep her eyes open. That little touch of relief better than any sleeping pill.

She wasn’t sure how long she’d been out but a sudden cry instantly pulls her from sleep.

You’re still in the bed, very much unconscious, but… You’re thrashing, so much so it’s hard to tell if you’re not seizing. The only thing convincing her that you’re in the grips of a terrible dream is the cries of terror filling her ears. Then…

“Natasha!” Your desperation and pain feel like a bullet straight through her heart. A red light flashes in the observation room, the others are coming, she has to get in there now before anyone can stop her.

“Natasha! Don’t!”Clint’s voice barely hits her ears as the door to your cell slams shut behind her.

For a moment she can’t breathe or move. The air of your cell is thick, swamp-like with your emotions. Taking a deep breath she gathers herself.

With effort, she focuses on every good memory she has of you, every happy moment, every safe tender night and… love. She pulls that core emotion around her like a cloak hoping it will somehow reach you.

“Get out of there, Natasha!” Tony’s voice is harsh through the speaker. She ignores him, almost to you.

A scream accompanied with a wave of abject terror and images of a lab almost send her to her knees. She doesn’t falter though, tears stream down her cheeks, her body shakes but still, she moves toward your thrashing form.

Slowly she lowers herself onto the edge of the bed, laying on her side. Her arms wrap around you, pinning your arms. Her legs do the same around yours holding you steady.

“No!” You screech as your head flings back. She barely avoids the hit.

She’s not feeling the fear you’re pumping out though, not anymore. All she feels is relief. It springs from some part of her she had forgotten about. You’re in her arms, the ache she’s felt for years quieting.

“Y/N, you’re dreaming baby.”

“Natasha, no!” You sob as an image of her own bloody body slams into her. She just holds you tighter.

“That’s not me. I’m right here. I’ve got you, Y/N.” She feels a shift in your body. “Do you hear me? Focus on my voice baby… Come back to me, Y/N… please.”

You gasp, “N… Natasha…”

“That’s right.” You’re no longer thrashing so she slides her hands to grasp yours. “It’s me.” Natasha keeps her mind focused on all those good memories that got her from the door to the bed. Focused on the love she feels for you.

A thick sob bubbles from you causing your torso to shake. You try to turn in her arms and panic grips her, remembering your reaction in the base.

“Keep your eyes closed ok? Can you do that for me?”

You nod and she helps you turn to face her. You’re so gaunt, so clearly battered, but somehow still so fucking beautiful to her.

A trembling hand releases hers rising to find her face. Natasha hears the speaker click, but her free hand shoots up, signaling them to shut up. Your fingers lay gently on her cheekbone, from there they slowly trace her features stopping on her lips.

In a movement as natural to the both of you as breathing you pull one another even closer, your lips fitting together perfectly.

Natasha nearly cries out with joy at that long forgotten warm feeling of love that always flowed form you when your lips met hers. It was thick and golden like-

“Honey.”

@mywinterwolf @disagreetoagree @breezy1415 @peachthatdrinkslemonade @5aftermidnight @jeromethepsycho @marvel-randomness @daniellajocelyn @katecolleen @yanginginthere @wonderlandmind4 @piensa-bonito @for-the-love-of-the-fandom @lesbian-girls-wayhaught @siriuslycloudy2 @alphalesbianwolf @sxph-t @marvelb00kwolf @itsqueenofchains @demonlover87 @firegoblet01

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff #black widow x reader #queer fic

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thevirgomen · 5 years

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How To Know If a Virgo Man Is Serious About You?

New Post has been published on https://virgomen.net/virgo-man-is-serious-about-you/

How To Know If a Virgo Man Is Serious About You?

Are you starting to feel that the Virgo guy you have the hots for is beginning to take more interest in you?

Is it possible that he may be having similar thoughts about taking things to a more permanent level?

Maybe, just maybe, is your Virgo man becoming more serious about you?

This is a question that is asked a lot by women when dealing with relationship issues regarding a man born under the zodiac sign of Virgo.

It’s generally not because he is playing about and messing with your emotions. No! it is more that he has a naturally shy side to his character and he is testing the ground to see how you respond.

A guy with a Virgo birth sign has the ruling planet of Mercury, the messenger of the gods. A large part of his character is governed by traits of keeping everything in his life in an orderly controlled way.

Generally very intelligent, he can sometimes be accused of over-thinking situations because he wants to keep everything organized.

A Virgo man may be difficult to read sometimes because he may be struggling with his own emotions and unsure about how to proceed. He wants to express himself but fears rejection if he doesn’t get things right.

He sometimes needs some subtle encouragement to bring out a character who is full of charm and who will make an honest and reliable partner.

Encouraging a Virgo man

The magical relationship with a Virgo guy can be enhanced by understanding his need to be encouraged into moving forward.

He needs to feel that it is his idea and he is making the running, you just need to understand how to get him to express his emotions to be with you.

Whether you are trying to draw a Virgo guy to you for the first time or you have had a breakup and you want him back this same understanding is needed.

His basic character is screaming out to be loved but you just need to find a way to connect with his thinking.

I came across something recently that has achieved this process and has proven successful for many women in sowing the seeds of desire into a Virgo man’s mind. It allows him to release his pent up feelings knowing that they will be welcomed and he won’t be rejected.

The magic of text messages

Sending text messages by cell phone these days has become the accepted way to communicate.

Text’s can be a pain in the butt if they are sent by bombarding the recipient, but carefully worded messages, phrased by an expert, can have an amazing impact on a man’s thinking.

Make him fantasize over you and make him chase you.

If you want to get your Virgo crush to pay more attention or focus more on you then you may find it interesting to discover this proven method.

Relationship dating coach, Amy North has developed a program of messages that are absorbed into the subconscious mind, making a man think only of the woman who sent them.

Carefully crafted messages can be adapted to suit your particular situation. This allows your Virgo guy the space he needs to move forward while knowing you are there for him.

Don’t just take my word for it, listen to a short video called Text Chemistry in which Amy explains this technique.

Now, please keep reading for more tips on how to be sure of making your Virgo crush seriously about you.

Is your Virgo man serious or just flighty?

It is sometimes not easy to discover if a Virgo guy is just being friendly or possibly falling in love with you. He tends to have a very reserved nature and disguises his inner emotions until he is sure of his ground.

Born under the sign of the virgin a Virgo man displays a lot of uncertainties when it comes to commitment within a relationship.

Most girls would be delighted to be courted by a Virgo man, but the question is what type of girl is the best for a Virgo guy?

Yes, you can be sure that when he makes up his mind he will try and make that woman feel like the only one in the world, however, not every woman is understanding enough to make him happy.

See also: How to keep a Virgo man in a relationship and make him commit

Signs that show you may be the one

It is natural when we are in love we tend to feel on cloud nine and sometimes act differently.

When we feel a connection with a guy we just expect him to be the one who makes the first move. If he hangs back, what do you do?

One idea is Text Chemistry to get the ball rolling but read on for signs a Virgo man is becoming more serious about you.

Virgo men are known to be intelligent which in turn makes them focus on details. The more interested they become in something the more they begin to analyze the detail. This also follows on when he begins to notice a future partner.

When this guy starts to notice and comment on little details about you, it is a sure sign that he is making plans in his head to make a move on you.

Little details about your hair or a new outfit that fits you so well! You may well be surprised by the things he notices, even some of your best friends have not commented on.

Related article: How to make yourself irresistible to a Virgo man

Becoming more relaxed around you

As I have already said, the Virgo guy is prone to be reserved and sometimes quite shy until he is sure of his ground. He finds it hard to open up to new people so if you find he is more casual and relaxed you are definitely making progress.

You may find him popping up unexpectedly to ask you a question or to get your opinion on something that has caught his interest. These are really encouraging signs as it means he is beginning to trust you.

Trust is a big thing with Virgo men so you should be aware never to abuse it. Knowing the characteristics of someone you love will avoid many upsets in the future. This Youtube video may give you some pointers from an astrological view.

youtube

Virgo man and romance

Virgo in a male is not usually recognized as a romantic zodiac sign. However, it all depends on how you view romance. A Virgo guy tends to avoid cheesy gestures which he considers are just for show and concentrates on making surprises that can make you feel really special.

Before he makes any advances on you he will have made up his mind the type of girl you are and the things that you enjoy. He may surprise you with something that you mentioned you liked a while ago. You may have forgotten about it, but he won’t!

A Virgo guy is a man who is not destined to spend his life alone but is aware of his characteristics and needs a partner who understands him. A study by a leading expert discovered a hidden obsession that if used properly by a woman can make him easily fall in love with her.

Relationship and dating coach James Bauer has devised a program called His Secret Obsession which has helped scores of women find true and lasting love with their Virgo guy. If you want your Virgo crush to make you the center of their world listen to a short video here as James explains his program.

See also: The secret a Woman must know in understanding a Virgo man

Final thoughts

On the face of it, a Virgo man may seem complicated and distant. But this is far from the truth when you give yourself time to understand his complex character.

He hates the thought of not making his own decisions and the feeling of being trapped in a situation in which he has no control.

A Virgo man is honest and trustworthy with the people he loves. He wants to share his life. If you want to get his attention or enhance a relationship that may be losing its zing check out Amy North’s Text Chemistry.

If you have started dating but are worried he is losing interest or you have made up your mind he is the one, and you can’t get him to commit, you need to listen to relationship coach James.

The program he has devised explains exactly how to bring out the best in a relationship by understanding His Secret Obsession.

I hope this article has been of help in understanding a Virgo guy. If you follow the tips above I’m sure you will soon know if your Virgo man is serious about you. Good luck

My joy is in giving

Charlene

#love #make him chase you #relationship #Virgo man

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kaistarus · 5 years

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Clickbait: Chapter 3

Summary: A lot of great things came with being a big name YouTuber, but along with those perks were some serious drawbacks. One of the biggest being your lack of personal privacy. Due to just one video, Kirishima's least well-kept secret has become a viral sensation overnight, and now he has to deal with the repercussions from both the YouTube community and the public. Hopefully, those he's dragging down with him won't mind...

Words: 4,418

Pairings: kiribaku, tododeku

First Chapter Here

“Oh, stop that.” Mina shooed his hands from his shirt, undoing the top button he’d been fiddling with since they’d left the apartment. “I spent money on this. Don’t wreck it before we even get there.”

“I still think I should’ve—”

“If you even mention that lime-green pineapple monstrosity I’ll have this Uber turn around.” Mina threatened with playful eyes.

Kirishima pouted. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Mina’s fashion choices—charcoal did bring out his eyes—he just missed the familiarity of his statement pieces. He knew there was nothing wrong with dressing to impress on occasion, but too much effort made him nervous. At least his hair was still bright-red and spiked to perfection—a true Kirishima statement piece.

“I think you look beautiful in everything you wear.” Kaminari gave a thumbs up from the passenger seat.

“Instigator.” Mina huffed.

Kirishima let his head roll against the window in disdain, watching his breath fog the glass, cold from the car speeding through a Spring’s night. He focused on how the window shook against his temple, tuning out the sound of Kaminari dragging their Uber driver into a nonsense conversation. To be fair, the driver had asked about their week out of polite obligation, so he felt worse for himself at being subjected to Kaminari’s theory of ghost squirrels for the third time that week.

Around them the city was bustling. Cars and stoplights, venues and nightclubs, enormous advertisements; they lit up Los Angeles like every star it stole from the night sky. They passed misfits in street bands using dirty buckets and cheap guitars, strangers selling illegal products to oblivious tourists, and others promising talents that almost always fell short. After a few years here Kirishima had learned the area and discovered the patterns, but it’s diversity always brought a mystery he could never solve. The chaos that kept it alive and him with it.

It was a far cry from the town he and Mina had grown up in.

“We’re here.”

He hadn’t noticed the Uber driver pull over until Mina had him halfway out the car. They were dropped off in front of a five-story red bricked apartment complex that looked nothing like where Kirishima imagined Bakugou living. The plain exterior didn’t match his flashy, overly confident attitude in the slightest. “I’ll message Uraraka to let us in,” Kirishima said when they reached the vestibule.

“It’s like we’re back in college, eh?” Kaminari nudged him. “Waiting to get buzzed into a party?”

“Kirishima the only reason you’re getting into a party?” Sero smirked. “Yep, you’re definitely back in college.”

“He isn’t listed on here.” Mina interrupted. She was pointing to a list hung by the keypad, filled with names and apartment numbers.

“He probably doesn’t want followers randomly popping in.” Kirishima shrugged.

“Or maybe he doesn’t want the cops to find him.” Kaminari opened the main door when a buzz surrounded them.

“You better not say things like that when we get up there.”

“People need to know Kirishima,” Kaminari rolled his eyes at Kirishima’s stern glare. “Kidding. I’ll be a good boy.”

“What was the apartment number?” Sero asked as they entered the elevator.

Kirishima opened the messages from Uraraka and hesitated. “Uh… 420?”

Sero shook his head before pressing the button to the fourth floor.

“Look, man.” Kaminari placed a hand on Kirishima’s shoulder. “If this all ends up being a prank, I’m willing to fight a girl.”

“She’d kick your ass.” Sero snorted.

Kirishima quickly learned that although the building seemed simple—gray carpets, tan walls, no pictures or art—it was impossible to navigate. It took them nearly fifteen minutes to work through the winding halls—door numbers following no obvious order—before they finally arrived at apartment 420. And after the senseless excursion, Kirishima experienced he changed his mind; it was exactly the kind of place he pictured Bakugou living in.

The faint bass thumping passed the apartment door’s false wood shook the surrounding hall. Kirishima hesitated briefly before knocking, irritation from the senseless journey overpowering his previous nerves. The host's response time was quicker than he was expecting.

“Kirishima!” A short girl, soft edges and wide smile, pulled him into a tight hug—hold strong for someone her size. “I’m so glad you all actually came!”

“Yeah. Well, you know. I’m a fan of them. And you. A normal fan. Not a weird one”

Uraraka smiled, a knowing look in her eyes that made Kirishima uneasy.

“At least one of us is normal!” Mina linked their arms together. “I’m a huge fan of yours. Honestly, the main reason we’re here is that I’m like, obsessed.”

Mina gave Kirishima a subtle wink. She had promised him that she’d start paying off her debt tonight. She’d be anything he needed: wingwoman, distraction, comic relief, he names it and she’d play it. Obviously, he wouldn’t do that to her, but that wouldn’t stop her from following him around and doing it anyway.

“Wha—really?” Uraraka’s cheeks turned pink—pinker.

Mina grabbed Uraraka’s hands. “I binged you in one night. You’re amazing.”

“But you—I don’t—you’re so much more popular than me.”

“Like that matters. People are sleeping on you, girl.”

Kirishima wondered if Mina knew she could have the world wrapped around her well-manicured finger.

“Holy shit,” Kaminari swatted Kirishima’s arm. “Is that Earphone Jack?”

Several meters behind Uraraka was a girl decked out in rocker apparel, signature skull headphones hanging off her shoulders, leaning casually against a black leather couch. Definitely Earphone Jack. She was talking to someone else; a girl with long black hair dressed more readily for a wedding than a casual get-together. She seemed familiar—YouTuber?

“Good luck getting your man.” Kaminari gave a salute then beelined towards them.

Sero sighed. “I’ll try to keep him in check.” As he walked off, he called over his shoulder. “Try.”

Well, there’s a stress-factor he hadn’t considered.

“Oh!” Uraraka pulled away from Mina. “I should show you guys around.”

Kirishima could mingle himself, but it was probably better to meet through Uraraka considering his circumstances. Not that he had a choice since Uraraka was dragging him by the cuff of his sleeve before he could reply—Mina practically skipping behind him.

The apartment was decently sized—two-bedroom with a balcony—but the number of people made it feel smaller. He was impressed by how many of those people Uraraka speed dated them through on their short walk to the kitchen. He met at least twelve new people, and in the whirlwind could only remember half their names. Surprisingly, nobody brought up the video—except one girl, Camie, but it was more harmless teasing than anything malicious. Everyone was awesome and he wanted to befriend them all, but Uraraka had an agenda. Which wasn’t met until they finally reached the kitchen’s border.

“Todoroki!” Uraraka flailed her arms above her head. Eventually catching the attention of a boy with a botched dye-job and mismatched eyes—contacts probably. He emerged with a red cup in hand and a bored expression, giving the impression that whatever Uraraka wanted from him was already a waste of the guy’s time. Uraraka didn’t seem to feel this way because her attitude didn’t falter in the slightest.

“This is Mina.” She gestured towards Mina who waved, “and this,” she said with an emphasis Kirishima didn’t appreciate. “is Kirishima.”

Todoroki blinked once, twice. Unimpressed. Uraraka kept her smile wide, patient. Then she gestured towards Kirishima once more, this time she tugged once on her hair. Todoroki’s eyes widened briefly, and he nodded in understanding.

“Shitty Hair,” he said, monotone. “I’ve heard of you.”

Kirishima heard Mina snort beside him and he mouthed the name to himself. That was a little rude for a first greeting.

“Todoroki!” Uraraka swatted him.

“But isn’t that—”

“Sorry about him.” Uraraka waved him off and he narrowed his eyes, grumbling something into his cup. “This social butterfly here is Todoroki. He’s the Mystery Unsolved’s main editor. He’s also Bakugou’s roommate.”

Kirishima’s face heated up. If there was one person who knew the situation it’d be Bakugou’s roommate. Although this Todoroki guy looked like he could care less about anything and everything, especially Kirishima.

He wasn’t sure if that made him more nervous or less.

“Todoroki is the reason we’re able to have this surprise party.” Uraraka elbowed Todoroki’s side.

“As long as Bakugou knows it wasn’t by choice.”

“We all know you’d face Bakugou’s wrath if it meant seeing Deku happy.” Uraraka elbowed him excessively. Kirishima swore his cheeks brightened, but it was hard to tell with the dim lighting.

“How are you planning on surprising them?” Mina asked.

“Deku and Bakugou are out late researching some stuff for their next video. I told Deku he needs to come here to walk me home.” Uraraka pumped her fist. “Bakugou was pissed, but that’s normal.”

Kirishima raised a brow. Pissing off a man of honor before filling their house with people seemed like a terrible idea.

“Like I said,” Todoroki observed the rest of the party goers, “as long as he knows I had nothing to do with it.”

“Why didn’t you have the party somewhere else?” Kirishima asked.

“Bakugou is too perceptive for his own good,” Uraraka rolled her eyes. “To be honest, he likely already knows what we’re doing right now. He’s probably just humoring us, that asshole.”

“As long as he knows—”

A short jingle sounded from Uraraka’s pocket and her hands moved like lightning to get it out.

“They’re on their way!” She shook Todoroki’s shoulder. “It’s Deku. He says they’re on their way!”

She disappeared into the crowd, reemerging above everyone at the center of the room, assumingly standing on furniture. After garnering attention, she announced the ‘guests of honor’s’ arrival—odd word choice considering the apartment—and demanded quiet. The tall guy with the glasses he’d met earlier turned off the music while others huddled into respective groups. Any nerves he’d managed to bottle up came bursting back with a vengeance.

“Hey,” Todoroki made him jump. He had assumed the guy would’ve walked off by now. “I saw your video.”

“Oh… yeah?”

Todoroki didn’t respond. He remained as stoic as ever, but as the guy turned away Kirishima caught an icy glare.

“He hates me.”

“No,” Mina brushed off. “He just has that face.”

Kirishima shook his head. “No.” That guy hated him, which probably meant Bakugou hated him. He gulped.

The mixture of giggling and shushing sent jitters like electricity throughout the room. Mina squeezed his shaky hand and whispered into his ear, “ready?”

He nodded, but when keys jingling made someone squeal, he debated running. The door creaking and people shouting ‘surprise’ were the last things his brain took in before he briefly malfunctioned. Bakugou had pushed open the door, standing in the frame with those fierce crimson eyes and soft bone structure, he was a perfect contradiction. Somehow, he was even more attractive in person.

He was also shorter than Kirishima imagined.

And a lot louder.

“What the actual fuck round face!” Bakugou’s voice reached above the combined cheering. Beside Bakugou, Midoriya’s lower lip started to quiver.

This apparently was the expected response because even though Bakugou’s screaming could currently rival LA traffic Uraraka was closing in for a hug. Midoriya started busting out some serious waterworks, but Todoroki surprised Kirishima by giving Midoriya a comforting hug; even allowing him to snot on his shirt. It was an amusing display, and Kirishima briefly wondered if his friends looked this confusing to outsiders.

He’d been so lost in the scene he hadn’t realized Bakugou was staring at him until he was consumed by the fiery gaze, completely frozen in place. This was it, he thought, the moment of truth.

He didn’t know how to react when Bakugou turned away, lecturing Midoriya about being a ‘little bitch’. It was as if Bakugou had looked right through him.

“He really is just like they say, huh?” Mina laughed.

“They both are.”

“You okay?” Mina raised a brow.

“Yeah,” Kirishima half-smiled. “I think I need some fresh air.”

Mina looked skeptical but let him leave. Kirishima went to the balcony, assuming people would give congratulations for a while. He sat down and let his legs hang off the balcony, the bars close enough together that he could lean against them without fear. From there he could take in Los Angeles’ lights, and listen to the cacophony of poor driving and the occasional drunk from below.

He wasn’t disappointed Bakugou hadn’t made a scene. That combined with everyone else’s reaction showed him he’d been blowing this controversy out of proportion. He should’ve known a group of YouTubers would understand the situation—treat it maturely. If a part of him had fallen prey to Mina’s romcom ideas that was his own fault. Thinking Bakugou would’ve acknowledged him in the slightest was high hopes where Kirishima was concerned. Even with the entire internet throwing a spotlight his way he still couldn’t make an impression. He was still that same nobody from before the vlogs.

He could never escape his past.

The balcony door slid open. He hadn’t known how long he’d been stewing in his misery, but he knew Mina was probably watching the clock. He was ready to be dragged inside. There were people he wanted to talk to aside from Bakugou and he shouldn’t let his own worthlessness ruin Bakugou and Midoriya’s night.

“What the fuck are you doing out here alone?”

Kirishima’s grip on the bar tightened. He knew that voice, and it definitely wasn’t Mina. Knowing that he still wasn’t prepared to see Bakugou; eyebrow raised, and hands hung loosely in his hoodie pocket. Kirishima turned back around slowly—he couldn’t talk making eye contact.

“Could ask you the same thing.” Kirishima tried to sound cool, but he felt like an idiot. His face was warm.

Bakugou scoffed. “Too many fucking people. Needed some air.” He moved next to Kirishima and leaned against the balcony, looking out at the cityscape.

Kirishima nodded. “Same.” He extended the word awkwardly. He wanted to die. Kirishima fleetingly wished that Bakugou was acting peaceful and would surprise throw him off the ledge.

“Round Face invite you?”

Kirishima remembered him screaming that at Uraraka earlier. “Yeah…”

“Of course, she did,” then under his breath. “That meddling bitch.”

Kirishima found it odd he’d be calling his friend bitch, but he didn’t comment. “You’re not like… mad?”

“Why the fuck would I be mad?”

“Because…” Kirishima raised an eyebrow and looked at Bakugou. “The video?”

“Oh.” Bakugou rolled his eyes. “I don’t give a fuck. Your friend posted a video with a bunch of out of context shit for views. It’s not your fault the internet is fucking crazy.”

Kirishima stared at his shoes. “Out of context…” His eyes widened. “Out of context! Yeah! I’m so glad you understand, man. I thought it was gonna be impossible, almost unbelievable even.” He laughed a little too long. Bakugou narrowed his eyes.

“Right…”

“Yep,” he popped the ‘p’, leaning his head against a bar. “Anyway, I’m sorry for all the attention and rumors and memes… you know.”

“It’s whatever.” Bakugou leaned his chin onto his crossed arms. “I feel fucking sorry for you. You’ve got all the fanboys and fangirls. They’ve gotta be giving you shit.”

“Giving me shit?”

“Yeah,” Bakugou’s arms shot forward. “Cause like, you’re all peppy and social and nice and crushing on the anger management asshole? That can’t be good for your image.”

Kirishima snorted. He can’t believe that was something that crossed Bakugou’s mind. His heart felt like it was his entire chest.

“Peppy and social and nice?” Kirishima snorted. “That’s what you think I am?”

“Fuck off.”

“Well, maybe I am on camera.” Kirishima shook his head. “And trust me. My fans are very supportive of me. If you had a Twitter you’d get to see all the fan art I’ve gotten sent my way.”

“Oh? Well, if it has me in it. I’m sure it’s fucking fantastic.”

“It’s definitely… imaginative.”

Bakugou huffed out something akin to a laugh. Kirishima felt so soft. He couldn’t believe this was happening when just moments ago he was putting himself down. Bakugou was being so calm too; a complete flip from when he’d first arrived at the party.

“I’m going back inside. It’s fucking cold.” Bakugou pushed back from the railing. “You coming?”

Kirishima nodded. “Yeah, there are some people I need to—”

The balcony door slid open and Sero poked his head out.

“Hey, man. We should head out. That new BlackPink song came on and Uraraka started dancing on the coffee table. Denki’s drunk ass thought he could impress everyone by joining in, but now he’s on the floor and making a scene,” he seemed to finally process who was standing next to Kirishima. “Uh, sorry about the carpet.” Then he slammed the balcony door closed.

Kirishima should’ve known that the true disaster tonight would be Kaminari.

“Who the hell is Denki?”

“Uh, Kaminari? Blonde?” Kirishima shrugged. “You haven’t really seen my videos so—”

“Sparky?” Bakugou rolled his eyes. “Of course, that fucker would do some stupid drunk shit.”

Kirishima mouthed the odd nickname. What was up with those tonight?

“Sorry about that.”

“It’s fucking whatever. It was probably half Round Face’s fault. It’s usually her fucking the place up.” Bakugou sneered. “I’ll fucking kill her for it later.”

‘Murderer’ echoed in his mind in Kaminari’s voice, but he quickly shook it out.

“Right,” Kirishima looked to the door. “I should probably go collect my idiot. Congratulations, by the way.”

Bakugou waved him off. Their conversation wasn’t much, but Kirishima was on cloud nine when he reentered the apartment. Kaminari was easy to find, a small crowd gathered around him as he cried gibberish between sniffles. He clung to Mina’s hands while Uraraka apologized profusely to Sero.

“What happened to being a good boy?” Kirishima said kneeling beside him.

“It was Kill This Love, Ei. It would have been disrespectful if I hadn’t danced.” He cleared snot with his sleeve and Mina gagged, trying to free her hands. Kaminari clung tighter. Kirishima sighed, picking Kaminari up bridal style. In his peripheral, he saw Midoriya and Todoroki watching the scene unfold. Amongst the chaos, he’d temporarily forgotten Midoriya, one of the people he’d wanted to talk to most. Now that he learned where he stood with Bakugou he felt a lot more confident going over there with Kaminari groaning in his arms.

“Hey,” He cut in. “I’m Kirishima. I’m a really big fan of your videos.”

Midoriya smiled and Kirishima went momentarily blind. “Thank you! I’m a fan of your vlogs too. I’ve been watching them for a long time.”

Kirishima’s mouth fell open. No matter how many people told him they watched his videos he still couldn’t fathom it. The numbers never seemed real. He especially couldn’t process when people he admired thought he was worth watching.

“That’s incredible,” he struggled to find the right words. “Thank you so much I—"

“Ei, I’m tired.” Kaminari moaned.

Kirishima rolled his eyes. “Sorry about our child. We should’ve kept a better eye on him.”

“It’s okay. If it wasn’t him it probably would’ve been Uraraka.”

A ‘hey’ was shouted behind him and Kirishima laughed.

“That’s what Bakugou said, too.”

Midoriya looked surprised and Uraraka busted into their conversation. “You were talking to Bakugou? When? Where?”

Kirishima nodded towards the balcony. “A few minutes—”

Uraraka stomped off before he could finish. He heard a few curses mumbled under her breath and Kirishima was finally understanding how she and Bakugou meshed so well.

“Don’t worry about her,” Midoriya said. “She’s just… passionate.”

Kirishima smiled like he understood what that meant. The others started calling him front the front door and he frowned. He wouldn’t say his time with Bakugou a waste, but he wished he’d gotten more time with everyone else here as well.

“Don’t worry, I’ll see you around,” Midoriya said with a reassuring smile.

Kirishima wanted to believe him.

The elevator ride down was quiet aside from Kaminari’s obnoxious drunken breathing. Kirishima still wasn’t sure if tonight actually happened, or if he’d wake up tomorrow having it all been a crazy fever dream. Both options seemed equally plausible now that he was given time to process.

“The Uber will be here in five minutes,” Mina said as they exited the apartment complex. The temperature had dropped, a light breeze carried a new chill to the air. They huddled together on the curb while waiting for their ride, basking in each other’s warmth. Kaminari blanketed himself across their laps while Mina leaned heavily against Kirishima’s side, his arm wrapped snug around her. Sero opted to lye flat against the rough concrete, bones aching from exhaustion.

“I talked to Bakugou.” Kirishima’s voice cut through the silence. It wasn’t information they hadn’t known, but more a signal he was ready to talk about it.

Mina shuffled against him. “Good talk?”

“I think so,” Kirishima looked up at the few stars that fought against Los Angeles’ unforgiving lights; a humored smirk on his face. “He thinks the videos were out of context.”

Sero sat abruptly. “How.”

“I wasn’t going to debate it. I just took that miracle for what it was.” Kirishima shrugged, watching Mina play methodically with Kaminari’s hair. “Then we talked, and it was good.”

“You’re so cute.” Mina smiled.

“I mean,” Sero laid back down. “If he’s that dumb. You may be able to woo him just yet.”

Kirishima snorted and allowed the comfortable silence to befall them again, this time following them back until they struggled to get Kaminari ready for and in his bed. The emotional exhaustion that caught up to them was bone deep and aching, it left them crawling to their beds—Mina to the living room couch. Kirishima slept heavily, pitch-black fatigue that left no room for dreaming, only in the early hours did he catch a crimson stare chasing him into reality, invading his mind while on the cusp of consciousness. His brain was too muddled to comprehend it and it had fled his mind as soon as it’d come.

A kitchen melody of pans clanking and cupboards slamming told him somebody was already awake. The thick scent of fried meat wafting under his door had him throwing on the first sweats he saw and running out of his room. Sero was standing over a pan of bacon that sizzled and popped at the press of his spatula; the pan beside it warming up thick pancake batter. Kirishima’s stomach growled. He should’ve known it was Sero, nobody else could cook.

Mina was already eating at the kitchen island—showered, dressed, more put together then Kirishima could dream of—and was typing away on her sticker-covered pink laptop. It reminded Kirishima he was supposed to upload today, but he still had absolutely nothing planned. Mina gave him a quick smile and he decided he’d worry about that later. He had never missed an upload, so he’d figure it out one way or another.

He grabbed his favorite Crimson Riot plate from the cabinets—only for special occasions—and piled it with pancakes and bacon. Then he drenched them in a sea of syrup until he could barely tell there was food to begin with.

“Your sweet tooth is disturbing, Ei.”

“Everyone knows pancakes are just an excuse to eat syrup,” he said, taking the stool next to her. “Honestly, if you can even taste the pancakes, you’re doing it wrong.”

Mina gestured to his plate. “Good mood?”

“You know it.” He said through a mouthful of syrup. “Whatcha typing?”

Mina scrunched her nose at him. “Video ideas. I actually have a surprise.”

“Cause that usually works out for you.” Sero quipped.

“You shush,” Mina puffed up her cheeks. “I invited Uraraka over to collab with us.”

“What?” Kirishima leaned over excitedly. “That’s awesome!”

“Stop yelling!” Kaminari shouted from his room, muffled by walls. Kirishima rolled his eyes, but his smile didn’t falter.

“Yeah,” Mina smiled. “We talked about it yesterday. She’s getting busy with her channel because it’s comeback season soon, but she was free today.”

“Comeback season?” Sero asked.

“K-pop!” Kaminari shouted. “New music!”

“Get your lazy ass out here!” Mina called, getting an excessive high-pitched whine in response.

Kirishima was hyped. They’d never collabed with anyone outside the squad, so this would be huge for their channels. He was also just excited to spend time with Uraraka because based on yesterday he’d been correct assuming they’d all get along.

Now that he was thinking about last night…

“Hey,” Kirishima tapped his plate nonchalantly, “do you know why someone might call Kaminari ‘Sparky’?”

Sero snorted. “Probably because he static shocks everything he touches.”

Kirishima raised an eyebrow and on cue Kaminari stumbled into the kitchen. Cradling his head, he moved towards the sink, slumping forwards onto the counter he fumbled for the faucet. When he made contact a quick shock was heard and he pulled back with a hiss.

“Why does that always happen to me?” Kaminari cried, sliding down to the floor.

“That’s an old gag though.” Mina pointed out. “Like, wasn’t that Kaminari’s first meme?”

“Yeah, I’ve grown,” Kaminari called, lying flat on the floor. “Hey, if I just drink the bowl of pancake batter will it be the same as drinking water and eating pancakes?”

Sero kicked him. “Stop.” Then he turned to Kirishima. “Why? Who said that?”

Kirishima stared off into the distance. It was like he had all the pieces to a complex, funny looking puzzle, but he just wasn’t quite smart enough to solve it.

“Uh…” Their doorbell rang and he hopped off the stool. A perfect distraction. “I got it!”

Kirishima was so excited he didn’t even care that he hadn’t done his hair yet. Uraraka didn’t seem like someone who’d care about their appearances—at least he hoped not, Kaminari was hungover and whining in the middle of their kitchen.

“Hey, Urara… ka…” Kirishima had torn the door open with a huge smile that’d slowly fallen off his face. His eyes landed on the small girl he’d been expecting, all smiles and waving excitedly up at him. Then they landed on the guy slouching next to her. Kirishima had known who it was when the spiky ash-blonde hit his peripherals.

His fight or flight activated.

Uraraka raised an eyebrow. “Um… Kiri—”

He closed the door.

#kiribaku #tododeku #kirishima eijirou #bakugou katsuki #bnha #boku no hero academia #bakusqaud #uraraka ochako #mina ashido #midoriya izuku #todoroki shouto #i'm finally back people #the update is here #youtube au #kiribaku fanfics #fanfiction #read my shit #kaminari denki #sero hanta

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sol1056 · 5 years

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multipart ask on Keith

I would honestly love your thoughts on Keith’s character development, specifically him leaving for the Blades in S4. Personally I’ve always been on a fence with how they wrote Keith’s character after that. For one, he started as a lone wolf and I always thought they would subvert that along the way with more character interactions and team building episodes like in S1, but apparently S4 throws all of that away. I thought him forcibly being the leader of voltron would be a great opportunity for development but Shiro takes his place in the black lion and Keith just leaves.

It really didn't help with all the signs pointing as him as the true leader of voltron when he barely even interacted with the team personally (except for shiro) after that point. To top it all off his “maturation” was a two year time skip montage with his mom and he suddenly became level headed and ready to fly Black. So when he finally returns and become the leader of voltron it felt a bit underwhelming and hollow. To be honest I also find his interaction with the team afterwards kinda out of character [...]

I just wanted to hear from a writers perspective if Keith leaving was a good idea for his character in general. He had some really good scenes in his time with the Blades but i personally think in exchange it took way too much [away from] his development with the others. I also wonder if it's even possible [to execute well] leaving for the Blades and then becoming the leader of Voltron.

Here’s a general rule: avoid leaving any of your protagonists at a bus stop.

A few chapters is already pushing it; the equivalent of 1.5 seasons is out of the question for all but the most superlative of writers. I’ve met superlative, and believe me, no one on the VLD staff qualifies. If they did, they wouldn’t have been writing for VLD in the first place.

The start of S4 will forever baffle me. Had S3/S4 been broadcast as a complete season, I might’ve assumed there was a technical error, and would’ve tweeted at Netflix and not returned to watch until I got word this really was the midpoint episode. No warning, no foreshadowing, not even a peep out of Keith, and suddenly he’s working with the Blades.

In an ensemble cast, the point is that it’s an ensemble; you don’t forget one of your core cast at the bus stop while the story-bus trundles on. If Keith were meant as a protagonist, then sidelining him for 1.5 seasons is an even worse crime. If the intent of the story, thematically, is 'stronger together’, shoving one of them out of the picture is pretty much the antithesis.

This is not to say you can’t do it; in hindsight, I think the clone should’ve been shelved and the real Shiro returned at the end of S3/S4. But that comes with the assumption that a) the team would struggle a great deal more in his absence, b) prompting development that would create a new dynamic once Shiro returned, and c) that Shiro himself would change in some degree, from/during his absence: one that, by definition, that would need to be complete.

In other words, if you’re going to remove a protagonist, two things must happen. One, they must be removed, which Keith wasn’t. The story checks in on him irregularly, and each time, he's treading water while the story moves on. Two, the absence must become a driver: in a sense, the absence is a presence of what’s missing, and regaining the character must be paramount.

VLD put minor effort into recognizing the impact of Shiro’s absence, limited mostly to the torture-porn of watching Keith isolated in (and by) grief. It couldn’t even be bothered to do that much, when it was Keith’s turn to fall off the team. No one missed him, no one needed him. The result was a clear message there was nothing Keith brought to the team that couldn’t be done by someone else. There was no presence in his absence.

Consider the few scenes in S4-S6 with anything of Keith. His storyline did nothing to push the main story forward. In S4, the Blades are focused on tracking a new quintessence, a subplot that discovers nothing, provides no twists, and goes nowhere. In S5, despite Keith being with the Blades, the two groups have dropped communication to such degree that neither is aware of the other’s participation in the Kral Zera.

If you’re determined to leave a protagonist in another castle, for heaven’s sake, use that distance to allow them to continue to impact the main storyline. Make their absence into a working presence that can link the two groups; the complete radio silence just underlines how meaningless the story considers Keith, in the overall plot.

In that light, Kolivan’s left-field decision for Keith to extract Krolia feels like VLD was grasping at straws, trying to find something to occupy Keith. Worse, that mission contradicts S4: the quintessence is no longer blue, no longer notable for its energy levels, and no longer transported to secret bases in massive quantities by major warships. It’s back to the usual maroon, carried on small cargo ships in limited quantities, and now a dangerous substance with questionable side-effects.

In a nutshell, VLD left Keith mired in pointless actions with no bearing on the rest of the characters (hello, suicide attempt never mentioned again). Late S5, VLD realized it needed to get a move on, if Keith was to get an upgrade. So it took the easy way out: an overload of exposition flashbacks that neatly evaded any emotional beats between Keith and Krolia. VLD had no idea how to get Keith from point A to around point K, so it settled for just telling us Keith had grown up. On a space whale.

Had we been given a better reason (or any reason) for Keith joining the Blades, had we been given a hefty sub-plot for Keith that led him back to the team in an organic fashion (or at least dovetailed with the main throughline), had the story used those seasons to show us Keith learning with the Blades in a way he couldn’t or wouldn’t with the team... well, for one thing, it’d still contradict the ‘found family’ and ‘stronger together’ themes, since it’d be even more clear that Keith was stronger elsewhere.

But setting that aside, at the very least, Keith wouldn’t have returned feeling he’d gotten a personality transplant. We would’ve seen his progression, such that any given point along the way would’ve been recognizably Keith, even if the starting and ending points were almost a one-eighty. It’s called character development; most stories do it as a matter of course.

I’m left concluding that the creators genuinely don’t grasp that characters will change per their experiences. It’s a crucial element in storytelling, because characters are the core of any story. If you can’t figure out what would make a character choose A this time and B next time, you’re failing on one of the most fundamental aspects of characterization. In fact, you’re missing the entire point of a story: character choices are the plot.

I do have to take exception to ‘signs pointing to [Keith] as the true leader.’ I’ve posted before about the mentor trope, and how Shiro’s S1/S2 arc contradicts Keith as Black Paladin. I suggest you read those before coming at me with the assumption VLD did any of the work required to establish Keith's leadership as inevitable.

It’s possible to have someone strike out on their own, learn valuable lessons, and return grown-up and able to handle the situation they’d originally fled. It’d be a very different story, though, one that isn’t focused on a titular robot, but on a single protagonist’s journey. It’d also be a story that has nothing to do with ‘stronger together,’ as the movement away (to learn) and back (to reclaim) means the protagonist only became stronger when they weren’t with the rest.

Keith taking command of Black in S6 should feel like a victory in terms of his arc: where once he’d recoiled, now he steps forward. But since we never saw how or why his perspective changed about leadership, all it would’ve taken is a subtle shift in Yeun’s delivery and we could be talking instead about how Keith returned and was still in his ‘you want me to lead, this is how I lead’ pique.

Shiro’s return creates another turning point where the question would be logically raised, and it’s almost as though (once again) there’s an episode or two we didn’t get. It’d be reasonable for someone to raise the question of whether the team now swaps again. Yet no one does, and we’re supposed to expect Keith --- who waved the little ‘Shiro is Black’ banner far more and for far longer than any other character --- is now content to command Black, with no need to even broach the topic.

That’s a radically different perspective Keith shows in S7 onward, and it’s a problem created by the lack of development for Keith, in S4-S6. In the course of a single episode, we literally went from Keith being his slightly out-of-his-emotional-depth awkward self, to someone clear-eyed and commanding almost to the point of arrogance. It’s not helped when his original characterization returns for the duration of his fight with Shiro --- only to blip out again as soon as Keith returns to the team.

And forcing that abrupt shift on Keith’s part meant the rest of the story (and the characters) got shoved around into their respective places and out of shape, as well. Stories are made of characters, and characters are dominos. You knock one over, and it has a cascade effect. Changing Keith from the character we knew to someone else wearing his face could not happen in isolation, and every character around him suffered as well.

Like Shiro and Lance, Keith had major potential to be a groundbreaking character. He was introduced as the kind of independent, socially awkward, spitfire character usually pushed to the forefront in American media, yet S1/S2 gave him a solid place as Shiro’s greatest supporter. Keith had all the makings of a hero we rarely see: someone who truly believes the title of leader is beside the point, that the team is what matters.

I’m used to Gundam, which almost always strives for a resting place of five (or four) protagonists standing shoulder-to-shoulder. There might be one among their ranks who gets the central position, but the narrative is firmly consistent that should the team lose any one person, it would fall apart. There’s no need to ever tell us the team is ‘stronger together,’ we can see that lesson play out, over and over, whenever the team is divided, split up, or loses someone.

AtLA followed a similar pattern; by the end, it’s obvious the strengths each person brings to the final battle. There’s no question that every single one is crucial for victory; there’s no point where someone leaves and there’s not immediate and significant impact on the remaining characters’ successes. Sure, Sokka may not be able to bend like the rest of them, but without his brains, they’d be sunk. Katara, Toph, and Zuko might not be able to bend every element, but if any one of them isn’t there, the team is going down. Aang may command the central position, but he can’t do it all on his own.

While AtLA shone in having characters who visually broke the mold of our usual white-dominated, male-dominated American cartoons, it also broke away from the lead hero + band of intrepid (but far less capable) sidekicks. Like Gundam, it presented a group of characters who grew into a true team. The pictures might show Aang in the middle, but every one else contributes an equal amount, in their own way.

VLD had the makings in its first two seasons to go that route. But its EPs wanted dark and edgy, a perspective too cynical to embrace the optimism inherent in a team-based story. Sure, their deconstruction of VLD’s S1/S2 trope-subversions brought the story to a point where Keith was declared the definitive top guy, the true Black Paladin, head of the paladins.

Thing is, pushing Keith into that position required altering his personality beyond all recognition, destroying the team dynamic, and gutting any chance of recognizing the other characters as equally integral to team success. In effect, making Keith the de facto leader required destroying the team: and what’s the point of leadership, then?

#vld #voltron #characterization #character arcs #analysis #sol thinks about stuff

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smallnico · 5 years

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[does a death drop into your inbox] It's Time. I've been looking for an excuse to send you more OC asks so like [points my gun filled with questions at you] I need to know about Qi's bond villainsona... What does Mandy do to keep herself so busy? If Jay thinks in music, if you were to take that literally what would that... Sound like...? What are Kash's clown opinions, if any? What's her sense of humor? How does Saadah feel about being so powerful? Does she know she's an icon? [dabs] Thank you

:D i hope you know i love you. keep pointing that question gun as long as you’ve got ammo, it makes me really happy

qi’s got a bit of a spiteful and manipulative side. like, not necessarily “causing the end of the world” spiteful, but he knows what his friends are good at and what concessions to make in order to achieve a desired outcome without losing more than he can get back, or losing control of the situation. he’s a person you never, ever want to play poker against. he’s not immune to fucking up by any means, though, and when he does lose his sense of control, he tends to come a little unhinged, though mostly in a self-destructive way? when things go according to plan, he gets smug about it, and when they don’t, he’s obsessively anxious about not deserving to be in charge of his own life and convinced that being alive was a mistake. y’know, as you do. in terms of bond villainy, he’s the kind of person who knows exactly what button to push to make you vulnerable to making bad decisions. as a kid, other kids didn’t like him, but were often afraid to bother him because the people qi didn’t like often got themselves into trouble with teachers or parents, without him ever making himself into a snitch. he lashed out a lot more than he does now as an adult, due to frustrations with his family and teachers and rules he wasn’t allowed to deny, not to mention his own identity, and particularly the internal pressure he’s always under to keep up appearances and not show weakness.

mandy’s back is sore from carrying the team. when she doesn’t have her hands full of theatre business, running around, planning cues, checking up with the actors, carrying messages from the director to the carpenters, bringing in her kettle from home for tea, finding lost props, providing emotional reassurance, not sleeping, and trying to keep track of everyone’s schedules (which qi does as well, he’s not saddling her with the work, he just makes it look effortless because he’s obsessive about that, and the two of them aren’t good enough friends for mandy to know this about him, so she lowkey resents him for it), she has lots and lots of violin practice, she’s working on a combined biology and musical theory degree, she has a part-time barista job, and she’s finally getting around to getting her driver’s license. she’s not very assertive, and has trouble asking for help or relief, so she’s always kind of frazzled, and frequently taken advantage of. she’s also pretty resentful about this, and sometimes considers leaving the theatre so people might actually recognize how much work she does and how much of herself goes into it. she’s eager to offer help, reluctant to demand recognition no matter how much she craves it, and resentful when she’s bowled over by the bigger and more vocal personalities around her. she’s a sweetheart, really, she’s just definitely going to snap one of these days, and the flames of her fury will know no extinguisher.

jay has a thing for music! he’s a highly auditory learner and communicator, expressive with sound and not so great with words, cus he has to kind of translate everything he’s thinking before he says it. he composes his own tunes and is sensitive to and affected by the subtle differences between, say, different kinds of speakers. he prefers vinyls because they have a more physical sound to them, for example, and even though his little portable tape deck has a tinny sound and fewer songs, he feels it sounds more sincere. he’s not a snob by any means, he does like digital music a lot, and in fact composes a lot of it himself, posting it on soundcloud under an alias.

i must confess that i’m not sure what you mean by “clown opinions”. i can answer to her sense of humour, though. she’s definitely a prankster at heart, she derives joy from bamboozling people and making truly groan-worthy puns. she’s not cruel in her pranks, but she has a tendency to sincerely not understand how far is too far. she has very little patience for pessimism and equally little patience for meaningless worrying, especially as far as romance is concerned -- i guess one of her ‘clown opinions’ is that romance tropes are stupid and everyone should just tell the people they like that they like them and save everyone the trouble of worrying about it. think like, cheshire cat tendencies. she also speaks in absurdist memes and sends them to the group chat all the time.

saadah feels pretty smug about it, to be honest. she likes being in the know and is physically unable to mind her own business, but she comes about knowledge in a pretty pedestrian and innocent way. she just has a trustworthy aura that compels people to tell her things, and to be fair, if she knows a secret, she won’t spread it around unless she has good reason to. but even so, it can get spooky the stuff she knows about people. and she knows everything, so of course she knows she’s an icon, but she doesn’t like to advertise it or anything.

thanks again for the ask! :>

#smallnioc #janetofficial #the askbox

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newfuneralbaskets-blog · 5 years

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Seven Secrets About Funeral Baskets That Nobody Will Tell You

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Tags: Funeral Gifts Other Than Flowers,Unique Bereavement Gifts,Bereavement Gift

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ayearofpike · 6 years

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The Visitor

Pocket Books, 1995 162 pages, 42 chapters + epilogue ISBN 0-671-87270-2 LOC: PZ7.P626 Vi 1995 OCLC: 33376660 Released November 1, 1995 (per B&N)

Mary Weist has lost her boyfriend to a tragic accident, and is shutting everyone out since his death. But there’s a bigger problem, or at least more intensive inner voices telling her friends and family that there was more to it than anybody knew. Mary has her own secrets that she’s keeping from the community, sure, but she slowly comes to learn that she’s not the only one. In fact, she eventually finds out that she had secrets she didn’t even know about.

I mean ... talk about misleading back copy, right? Yeah, Tom is important to this book, but the story is about Mary, who doesn’t even get mentioned here. Tom shows up about halfway in, and his whole job was to try to make Mary realize the truth of the secret she had ... suppressed? forgotten? We can discuss it more when we get there.

Also, this book inspired its share of hate and anger when it came out. We were used to this epic about vampires, and now we have two stand-alone novels in a row clocking in at under 200 pages. Plus this one reads super fast. I think I did it in less than two hours this go-round. Maybe at the time it came out we felt cheated of explanation and exposition, but honestly? This is a tight horror/suspense story that neither gives us too much nor expects us to make up too much. Maybe the story doesn’t even need to be this long, though I didn’t feel it was excessively padded.

It opens with Mary getting ready to go to a party that she doesn’t really want to attend. It’s been a month since her boyfriend died, but she’s been talked into this party by his best friend (who by the way also wants to jump her bones). He’s got her there because her boyfriend’s younger brother also plans to go and wanted to talk to her — not about his death necessarily, but just about the guy. It turns out that the brother has felt his continuing presence, which weirds Mary out so much that she goes outside. Her ride comes and gets her after a while, saying that the host (another ex-girlfriend of the dead guy) wants to try to get in touch with him with an Ouija board. Pike Trope #1: check!

The party dies out enough that they have a smaller group to try to reach Dead Boyfriend: Mary, Brother, Other Ex, Horny Ride, and Superfluous Redheaded Twins That Supposedly Help Boost Ethereal Signal (I’d like to call this Pike Trope #2, but I think it was only in one book unless you count the short story that mentions the book). They get the board going, and it starts to talk specifically about Mary: that once, long ago in Egypt, she lived and pretended to be a god. Obviously Other Ex thinks that Mary knows more than she’s letting on about how Dead Boyfriend kicked off, and is asking specific and pointed questions to the Ouija board, the answers to which seem to throw Mary under the bus. Still, the godhood bits are maybe too subtle or unrelated if we’re assuming Other Ex just wanted to implicate Mary (and because she’s taking notes, I think we’re supposed to understand that she’s not even touching the indicator anyway). Still, she doesn’t answer questions and she leaves with Horny Ride without completing the communication.

So they go back to Mary’s house, where Horny Ride gives her a full-body massage in front of a roaring fire (Pike Trope #3), and she tells him about a story she was writing the day she met Dead Boyfriend: an Egyptian goddess is buried alive, but Mary didn’t know why or what happened, and in walking through the woods looking for inspiration she met him. So the message from the board hits close to home. After no sex, Horny Ride leaves and Mary throws on a robe and drives out to Dead Boyfriend’s grave, where she lies down and dreams about his death. (Pike Trope #4: dreaming backstory!) Evidently, they had broken into the school to precount the votes for homecoming queen, and when a frightened security guard with a shaky trigger finger found them, Mary basically told him where to stick it. So he acted all big, and she tackled him, and in the scuffle the gun went off, thereby creating Dead Boyfriend. What we didn’t know before — the real mindfuck revelation that does more to explain Mary’s mental state and personality than anything else — is that she continued to fight with the guard, specifically to press his gun against his head and force him to pull the trigger.

Obviously Mary has never told anyone this story, but it goes a long way toward both understanding her aloofness toward anything and everything now as well as giving us a little more justification and understanding for what we’ll learn as the story goes along. But for now, she gets up and goes home and goes to bed, but is awakened by a bright light in her backyard. She has to put on a new robe to check it out, as her first one is dirty, but what she finds outside is a flying saucer. Before she has time to even think about what it’s doing or what she should do about it, there’s a bright flash and she finds herself lying on Dead Boyfriend’s grave again. Obviously this is a dream, so she walks back home and goes back to bed. But when she wakes up in the morning, there are TWO dirty robes on her chair.

She goes to work and tells her boss about the flying saucer encounter, and he suggests that this is probably related to her traumatic experience (though he has the civility to accept that she does not seem to be making it up). That night she dreams of an invisible being in a desert who slowly makes herself visible to the people and shapeshifts into a body pleasing enough that they begin to worship her. There’s our Egyptian goddess! Mary’s not prepared to write this all off as either suggestibility or coincidence, so she calls up Horny Ride in the middle of the night and tells him to come right over, bringing Brother and his Ouija board so they can try to figure out what is going on and who they were talking to before.

Before they can even ask the board a question, it spells out this poem about how all love, all burn, all die. It calls this the “Prayer of the False God,” which also appears as the book’s epigraph. Pretty ballsy of Pike to quote HIMSELF in his own book. I wonder if the poem came first and he built the story around it. But the presence doesn’t hang out very long this time, and the guys leave and Mary falls back asleep. The spaceship shows up again, and she tries to call Horny Ride, but the voice on the other end of the phone isn’t him. Mary thinks it’s the Ouija board, and when she says she wants her boyfriend back it says that her desires make her nightmare continue. Whatever that means.

Back at school after the weekend, there’s a new kid. If you guessed it’s Tom, you’re right! Mary is drawn to him for some reason, and goes so far as to take him for a ride after school. They go for dinner, take a walk in the woods, and end up naked in front of Mary’s fireplace again. (Yes, Pike addresses the parents: they’ve left town for the week, even though neither one really wants to leave Mary alone.) But this time it’s the dude who stops the sexytimes, echoing her rationale for not wanting to do Horny Ride. They hang out for another day without talking, and that night the spaceship comes again. This time Mary sees an actual alien, and reaches out to touch it, which sucks her into a vision of the past.

(Aside: I’m kind of pissed off that I didn’t take this book with me to Roswell when I was there three weeks ago. Would have made a more fitting picture for the the entry, right?)

This vision describes Clareesh, a fourth-dimensional extraterrestrial being visiting ancient Egypt who wants to meet humans despite directives not to be seen. She vibrates down to a visible frequency, then reads the humans’ minds and adopts the physical form that they find most pleasing. They take her for a god and worship her as such — all except the one woman who Clareesh mirrored for a moment while getting her bearings in a human body. This woman wants to be beautiful and immortal like Clareesh, and after 30 years she starts to get peeved that Clareesh isn’t sharing her secrets. So she raises a mob against her and threatens to kill her lover if Clareesh doesn’t make with the youngifying. Obviously alien physiology is different from human, and unfortunately so long in a human body has stunted Clareesh’s supernormal powers.So there’s nothing she can do as this angry power-grabber gruesomely kills the young man and buries them both together in a stone tomb. And she can’t get out, no matter how she claws and tears her fingers against the rock.

When Mary comes to, she’s back in bed, and there’s dried blood on her sheets. Message, obviously. So the next day she doesn’t hang out with Tom, but she follows him after school as he wanders aimlessly around town. At one point a car hits a fox dead-on, and Tom picks it up and cradles it to his chest. And it wakes up and licks his face and runs away. Mary stops following at this point, and Tom doesn’t come to school the next day because what for. This pisses off Other Ex, who assumes that Mary has given him what he came for and threatens that through the power of her father the mayor, she’s convinced the police to reopen the case of Dead Boyfriend. Mary’s pretty sure that Brother blabbed some of the stuff she told him about the night he died, but apparently it was Horny Ride, grumpy about Mary’s interest in Tom and looking to get his dick wet SOMEWHERE. What a fucknuts.

She has to go to work, and tells her boss a little more about what’s been going on. She leaves out the zombie fox, but not much else. The boss, in turn, tells a story of a spirit that rose up out of the cemetery nineteen years ago, while he was lost on a walk, and read his mind looking for pregnant women in the area. The one it fixated on — one he didn’t even think of as pregnant, because she hadn’t revealed it yet — was Mary’s mom. So he figures that there must be something larger going on related to her and it’s manifesting somehow now. Mary thinks of Clareesh here, but isn’t sure why.

She goes back to the clearing where she found the alien, because she’s pretty sure Tom is going to be there. When he is, she pulls a gun and tells him to bring her boyfriend back to life. He asks if she’s sure she wouldn’t like to go back to the spaceship with him, and she’s adamant: all she wants is her boyfriend. So they dig him up, and Tom embraces him, and pretty soon they’re both moaning in pain: the boyfriend because his soul is back but his body is still dead and a month stiff and rotten, Tom because this act has drained all of his energy and he is about to die.

Whatever, right? My boyfriend’s back! Only he isn’t really happy about it. Mary takes him back to her house and soaks him in the bathtub, thinking it’ll warm and limber him up, but all it does is pull embalming fluid out. She thinks maybe he needs something to replace the fluid with, so he can properly live again. Blood! Pike Trope #4! Of course — they would have drained it all at the funeral home and now he needs some. So she calls up Other Ex and says she did tamper with the homecoming queen vote and that she’s willing to share the real ballots if they drop their investigation. They meet at the movie theater, and before Other Ex can say boo Mary fucking WHALES her in the head with a hammer and drags her home, to be blood for her love.

(I realized that I never said we’re back in a small town: Seedmont, Idaho, population unspecified because Pike has finally learned something about small towns. That’d be Trope #1.5, I guess.)

While Mary is refilling her dead boyfriend with live blood, Horny Ride and Brother drop by. They’re looking for Other Ex, who has evidently disappeared. Mary’s salty about Horny Ride being only worried about his new cock sheath, and she dismisses them out of hand. Back with (Un)Dead Boyfriend, he wants to know how she brought him back, and she tells the whole story, actually not leaving anything out for once. He explains that, yes, his soul is back, but his body is still dead, and that she has to let him go for both of their sakes. So she takes him back to the cemetery and shoots him in the head right next to his grave, which ... how do you kill a dead body with a magically infused soul? Did the bullet just make an easier hole for the soul to get out? But he’s dead again, and she suddenly realizes:

She is Clareesh, given a second chance to sacrifice herself and step away for the good of humanity rather than stroking her own vanity. And she failed.

Tom is still alive, and now she recognizes him as her second-in-command from the good old fourth dimension. She gives him her life energy and orders him to call the spaceship and leave her on Earth. Which he does, after he buries her undead body with her redead boyfriend, to struggle for another five thousand years.

The epilogue takes us back to the party, where it’s Boyfriend, surprisingly not dead, who is against the idea of using an Ouija board to get in touch with Mary, who was killed when she resisted the security guard at school. It tells them that there is nothing more to be afraid of, and then swiftly goes silent, leaving Not-Dead Boyfriend to mourn at Mary’s grave, where he thinks he hears a moan from under the earth.

The Visitor is probably too long by half, but it tumbles along smoothly. I don’t blame Pike for dragging it out; there’s no way his audience was going to be happy with an 80-page book. But it probably would have worked better in one of his short story collections coming up quick. I’m not mad at it, even as it pulls from so much of what he’s written before, because every author does that. Maybe I needed this distance from the original context, coming as it did in the middle of TWO separate book series, to appreciate this one on its own merits.

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kateanddevinreview · 6 years

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London Has Fallen

In which Kate and Devin write a porno

Devin: Okay, so this movie is just Gerard Butler being a badass right? Is this the one with Denzel Washington? Or are neither of those things right.

Kate: It’s something like that.

Devin: Well, Butler showed up in the credits, but so did morgan freeman?

Kate: It’s a trifecta!!

Devin: Or maybe I'm just racist and mixed them up.

Kate: Or maybe it’s the two of them being badass together.

Devin: I made some comment the other day about minorities being underrepresented at the oscars or something and they asked what actors I think should win instead and I blanked on literally every minority actor I knew.

Kate: Hahahah. It’s still true though. And to be fair, could you name any white actors?

Devin: My brain got stuck on Tom Hardy and forgot literally every other actor on earth

Kate:I think he’s on tv now anyway. So far this movie is starting a bit slow. Do you think someone is going to be shot soon?

Devin: I find it weird that we are in....India?

Kate: I think we’re at an Indian wedding. Terrorist’s daughter is getting married

Devin: This is set up for motive?

Kate: Probs

Devin: The Phantom of the Opera and Harvey Dent go for a jog

Kate: Why are politicians always running? I don’t think they do that much

Devin: I think cause DC? it's an easy excuse to pan around the lawn

Kate: Ok well fine, coming at me with movie reasons. Wait, is this a sequel?

Devin: Is it? Was the last one just called "London"?

Kate: I was thinking Gerald saved a president in the last one?

Devin: She has crazy eyes

Kate: She does but she’s pregnant

Devin: I'll forgive it if we get through this movie without her vomiting.

Kate: She’s in like her third tri already so she really shouldn’t

Devin: Google says this is a sequel, to Olympus Has Fallen. Lots of stuff falling apparently

Kate: Knew it!!! I’ve seen that one too

Devin: Really? I'm guessing last time he saved President Harvey Dent from terrorists, wooed or impregnated his wife, and got hired for secret service or unfired from secret service

Kate: Unfired, if it’s what I’m thinking of

Devin: This time he'll save the Prime Minister from terrorists, see his kid born, and...uh. Be knighted? That's my guess

Kate: Seems like a totally logical guess to me. I’m betting he discovers the Prime Minister was murdered. I don’t think people are expected to attend state funerals?

Devin: I think it's cause his vice isn't available? I think normally this is the kind of thing they send him for. But I am basing that on episodes of Madam Secretary so who knows

Kate: New guess!! President is killed and Butler has to protect Freeman

Devin: Hmmm. Maybe. Is Freeman the Vice?

Kate: Yes. He said “Hello, Mr VP”

Devin: I'm missing like half of this dialogue, idk how

Kate: Cause it’s boring

Devin: I want splosions!

Kate: This baby melodrama music is not my favorite. Once again I feel like writing is letting us down?

Devin: Yeah. Be better hollywood!

Kate: Also important people shouldn’t just sign shit without looking at it

Devin: is this the fringe guy? No. Who is he? He's someone

Kate: I think? No?

Devin: Fringe guy is similar but different. Oh! The Magicians? Magicians teacher guy?

Kate: No, definitely not him

Devin: IMDBing....

Kate: “Most protected event on earth”= everyone will die

Devin: Yup. This cast listing order is stupid. Do we know British Gerard Butler's name?

Kate: You mean the head of the British security? Also no. Also I think they’re going to use kids?

Devin: Yes, British guy. Mr. Sands! From Limitless. Thanks wikipedia, for your superior cast list

Kate: Limitless. That’s right, I never watched much of that

Devin: I really liked the main guy and all the arts and crafts in that show. I'm sad it was cancelled. Also we should add the movie to our review list

Kate: Yes!

Devin: Splosion! I didn't think those guards were supposed to have real guns? Then again EMTs should definitely not have rocket launchers

Kate: Hahaha, yeah, those cops are definitely plants. It’s clearly a very well orchestrated attack

Devin: Pretty sure only america gives their cops guns. Also, rocket launcher

Kate: Wow I don’t care how this movie ends the world would not recover from this

Devin: Yeah Kate, it's fallen. Show. Us. The. Egg. It's not London unless I see the big glass egg and the ferris wheel

Kate: How did they know that one president wouldn’t leave on time?

Devin: Trackers? Or they caused the traffic?

Kate: No, he decided?

Devin: Motorcycles, a car's only weakness

Kate: Nice driving!

Devin: Don't injure civilians!

Kate: Ummmm, Devin. I think that ship has sailed.

Devin: He rammed the bad guy into a non bad guy car!

Kate: Oh fuck. Ok so who is the black lady? Is she the First Lady?

Devin: Voight buddy, you could have moved. He's the driver, she's the head of secret service

Kate: He was driving! It was a bullet! Give him some credit. Is she?

Devin: Yes. According to wikipedia

Kate: She’s not doing much. And she hunkered with the president?

Devin: Right? Stop flailing. Where is your gun, woman?

Kate: Oh god. That was brutal

Devin: That was very brutal

Kate: Why didn’t they park closer to the chopper?

Devin: Crashing in 3...2...oh ok nvm

Kate: Hahaha

Devin: He's got a cane so you know he's evil

Kate: So true

Devin: Moral of this movie: don't trust the handicapped

Kate: And yet, they didn’t detect a plan of this magnitude

Devin: Uh, did those people just have labels?

Kate: Yes. NSA and something else

Devin: Like, movie? Movie. We do not care

Kate: I’m assuming it will be important later?

Devin: Why is the lady not doing anything?

Kate: Nice, flares! I like flares. Why are they flying so low anyway?

Devin: I got distracted googling the secret service

Kate: Anything pertinent to share?

Devin: Apparently the director just does the boring shit, so idk why she's even here

Kate: Ummmm, I think the movie should end here?

Devin: Yes they all died. The End

Kate: No way anyone survived that. I call bullshit

Devin: Also, I assumed presidents would have like one guy their whole time in office? But apparently they hire someone new a lot. Oh she dead.

Kate: For the secret service?

Devin: As director. Like Obama had 2

Kate: I mean, that’s four years for each

Devin: Trump has already had 2. The first guy for like 2 months? 1 month?

Kate: Well, Trump does that a lot. He’s had like 8 communication directors

Devin: I just wonder if they choose to leave or if the president purposefully swaps them out

Kate: Also working for the president is really intense, so maybe you just burn out and have to leave

Devin: Makes sense. The local biker gang is here

Kate: I don’t think bikes make that noise. That is dumb

Devin: Yes. Also no one checked the wreck

Kate: At least we know from earlier scenes they are fast runners!

Devin: This looks like he put his manifesto on youtube

Kate: What point is there in entertaining this phone call? Also why does he care about one president?

Devin: Imagine if he called before they watched the video! Like 5 minutes earlier

Kate: Right? He should take the uniform too

Devin:

"Who is this?"

"It's...seriously? You didn't see my video?"

"h/o googling it"

"It's on youtube"

"yeah one sec, gotta sit through this 50 shade of grey trailer"

Kate: Ahhhhhhh Being hunted by motorbikes!! Oh no

Devin: Sure, that's subtle. Also this is a regular subway

Kate: I like that he was able to loot the body for weapons. Very practical

Devin: Jesus Gerard Butler. WTF? You went from zero to torture in no time

Kate: I know, little intense. Definitely running on adrenaline

Devin: This is the most 'murrican fucking movie. You cannot convince me that huge squads of racists didn't come out of this movie going "rah rah ‘murrica"

Kate: Oh god. Unfortunately yes

Devin: Although these talky bits suck. I'd rather have more fighting. Oh, thanks label, I really cared what time it was

Kate: Everyone is dead, that’s what this discussion is. I mean surrender and then ambush. How many people do they think there are? You’re not going to be professional right now? Weird

Devin: Blah blah blah. Bitch it was a wedding. Of course his family was there

Kate: How did you not know his family was there? It was a wedding. So dumb

Devin: What even is the point of that dialogue? There better be drugs in his water or something

Kate: What kind of shoddy intel are you all operating on? This is dumb. Do criticize if necessary. You have to teach them. Also off color jokes?

Devin: "You know what's most important Mike? Children. That's why we are never going to spend time with ours in any subsequent movie."

Kate: Of course it’s not your delta team.

Devin: Yeah why was that message not in code?

Kate: Zoom in!

Devin: Enhance! Your safe house has a fucking skylight!?

Kate: Seems like a pretty lame safe house. Oh this is gross

Devin: This movie is very gratuitous with its gore

Kate: It really is. And president you should not have done that. You are not almost out of this by any long shot

Devin: There must be a porno of this where they fuck right then

Kate: Did all of MI6 just die?

Devin: I'm not going to lie, that weird pirate porno you made us watch that one time is better than this movie

Kate: Haha! Oh pirates. Also my taste is terrible because I still enjoy this

Devin: I don't believe the hackers would make this basic of a mistake

Kate: No, me neither

Devin: Also driving seems like the quickest way to be spotted?

Kate: They kept everything under the radar but you didn’t notice this earlier?

Devin: Ok I guess at least the car is bulletproofed

Kate: How many of these terrorists are there supposed to be?

Devin: It's just the same 4 guys, they're really fast. They keep healing when they're off screen

Kate: Seems like an infinite supply. Mutants!! Also Mike is still somehow always faster

Devin: Now I want an action movie where 3/4 of the way through you realize he's been re-killing the same 5 guys over and over and surprise! it's really a fantasy/horror movie!

Kate: That would be so good. Change the whole game. I do oddly think this would make a good porno with very very little change

Devin: It's cause there's so much standing really close while breathing heavily and the plot is basically just as thin

Kate: Yeah pretty much. It’s a male romance novel

Devin: Also there have been.....5 women? in this entire movie. 6, I guess. Wife, mother, secret service director, beehive, assistant cop, MI6

Kate: Assistant cop?

Devin: Black lady?

Kate: I don’t remember her

Devin: She was in the bullpen with not!Fringe guy

Kate: Ok sure

Devin: Oh, ok, and random lady who had a text label I didn't read

Kate: There was the turning 30 woman and one lady head of state.

Devin: Still, none of these people shooting right now? There's like 20 guys in this scene!

Kate: Nope. Can’t have women in harm’s way unless they don’t have a choice. Also no lady terrorists

Devin: Only lady terrorists allowed are dead motivation ones

Kate: Also I’m subbing lady because it’s faster to type than woman

Devin: Agreed

Kate: Omg. Whispered “Mike.” Straight out of a romance novel

Devin: What? Are you ahead of me or did I miss it?

Kate: Maybe? The president whispered it

Devin: No! I must have missed the Mike whisper

Kate: He should be really tired by now. He didn’t have dinner!

Devin: "Hear that? My boyfriend is coming"

Kate: He really should just kill the president. It doesn’t make sense not to

Devin: There is so much manly eye contact and face holding

Kate: So much

Devin: Like I'm pretty sure almost this exact sequence happened in Outlander

Kate: In the porn there would be a scene where the president seduced him, Mike walked in on it, and then they have a threesome

Devin: With the bad guy?

Kate: Yup

Devin: That seems like it would be out of place plot wise. Would the bad guy turn himself in or something?

Kate: No. Just random sex that doesn’t make sense

Devin: Weird. The sex should make sense!

Kate: It’s for real a thing that happens in porn, you get whiplash. Oh god. This is lame. Really?

Devin: One punch where he runs all the way across the screen. So stupid

Kate: Did we learn who the brit mole was?

Devin: Nope. They hacked the police station I think? Damn! Wheelchair guy didn't even get to make a speech about how bad America is. This movie is not even pretending to care about America's mistakes

Kate: Why didn’t he just shoot everyone?

Devin: Out of bullets?

Kate: He hasn’t run out of guns until now

Devin: What even is this dialogue right now?

Kate: Really dumb

Devin: "You fuck with America? OH HELL NO. WE BAT SHIT. WE WILL FUCKING MURDER ALL Y'ALL."

Kate: America’s not even 500. Witty banter!

Devin: "EVEN OUR PRESIDENT WILL PICK UP A GUN FOR MURDER TIME"

Kate: Also he’s not dead because you haven’t killed him?

Devin: Yeah you just punched him a bit and talked nonsense

Kate: Once again, another thing they wouldn’t have survived.

Devin: I feel like the porno version of this has them go back to their wives at the end with lots of meaningful looks and sly smiles between the two main dudes. Like "yeah, we'll do this again next mission"

Kate: Oh no! But yes probably. Why was there a lock in an elevator?

Devin: Is the president the only one alive from this whole thing? They would definitely make out in this elevator

Kate: I think one other world leader survived? There was a missing link to the terrorist?

Devin: I guess?

Kate: Who sent a fucking video?

Devin: Honestly this plot is stupid Yeah he's def the mole. Also he's running away? Like he obviously did it

Kate: Are we supposed to care about him or her? Because I do not

Devin: They would have had sex earlier in the porno

Kate: Yeah. It would have made more sense. Just kill him already

Devin: Also she would have just arrested him. I feel like the porno would have less murder

Kate: It’s weird that normally I complain about too much sex? But this would just be better as a porn

Devin: Yeah our review is basically "this would have made a better porno"

Kate: How would you have found him?

Devin: Who hears "look out your window" and looks up at the ceiling? Oh maybe that's what the missing link was?

Kate: Also the VP does not have the authority to call that type of strike

Devin: What is this 10 angled shot explosion? Ok, we've got a baby

Kate: So it’s been at least a few weeks

Devin: No prime minister but I didn't realize it was his funeral so I feel like the president is close enough. Now knighthood

Kate: Sure. They don’t know how emails work? Re: is for replies

Devin: "Many people would say this is our fault, but we're america so fuck those people. we'll kill those people."

Kate: “Commence spending no time with my kid”

Devin: In the porno version we end instead with a mirror of the earlier DC lawn scene, with them sitting on a bench watching their wives/kids, and the pres saying something like "still want to quit?" and Butler saying "and leave you, sir? Never." And then meaningful eye contact. Roll credits.

Kate: Hahahah

Devin: Okay, so scores

Kate: Yes. Scores.

Devin: 3/10 for the movie, 6/10 for the porno

Kate: I go a little higher movie? Like 4.5 for the movie. 6 for porno though. I think we can agree that no porn should ever rank higher than 7

Devin: Yeah. Like, even amazing porn is still porn

Kate: Ummmm tropes? So many, “family as our motivation”

Devin: “America is terrible and we never learn anything”?

Kate: Which is so hypocritical

Devin: “One man assumes command of literally every other character without argument”

Kate: Hahahaha. So like 7 on the tropes? They all fit the plot really well

Devin: Yeah, I mean it had a very particular niche and it played to it

Kate: Exactly

Devin: I'm going to give the title an 8/10. Catchy and accurate

Kate: I can agree. Thematic

Devin: London did pretty much fall. Like an old lady in a Life Alert commercial

Kate: Better than Olympus has fallen

Devin: Yeah, plus how fucking pretentious is it to call the white house "olympus"?

Kate: Exactly

Devin: What would the porn title be? I feel like they're usually puns?

Kate: Pun for sure. London may fall but our guys stay up

Devin: kind of long

Kate: It could be the tagline?

Devin: Oh yeah, good tagline. My brain gave me "Banging Private Ryan" which does not fit but is almost certainly a movie that exists

Kate: Hahahahaha. Banging president something? Whatever his name was

Devin: No idea, I called him Harvey Dent the whole movie. London Goes Down?

Kate: London laid down? Cause laid. Get it?

Devin: H/o I have to see if there is a real porn title for this. NSA people monitoring my internet searches, I'm really sorry

Kate: Gives them some spice! A story to take home

Devin: Top result for "London Has Fallen Porn Title" is:

"London Has Fallen movie condemned as racist 'terrorsploitation' "

"London Has Fallen is gun-barrel porn"

Kate: Whelp. Yep. I feel bad for enjoying it?

Devin: "London Has Fallen Is The Worst Film About Our City Ever"

Kate: Oh no it was a piece of shit for sure. Super fucking racist

Devin: “Blowing London.” That's my official submission

Kate: Nice! “Blowing London” is great. I thought you’d actually found it.

Devin: Ok, any parting words?

Kate: It was a dumb racist movie that I feel guilty for enjoying anyway? Which means we should have more action movies made with better plots and motivation. And female representation!

Devin: Or more action movies that are just porn

Kate: Or that. What about you? Parting words?

Devin: If you want to see a movie where Gerard Butler brutally murders everyone, this is it. Or, you know, go watch 300, it is less awful.

Kate: So true.

#kate and devin review #london has fallen #murrica

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kyloren · 6 years

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Mileven post-S2 fanfiction recommendation list: PART III

This is a follow-up part III to the first and second instalments I made. I am far, far from finished with ao3 tag, as you can see. If your fanfic isn’t featured, apologies. Message me and we’ll amend that grievance in the next rec list instalment.

* marks the ongoing stories.

canon:

can’t help falling in love with you* by Phantasmoplast: “The gate has been closed, Will has been cured, and the girl who has been haunting Mike’s dreams for a year is back. Everything is back to normal. Everything is perfect. There’s just one burr: Mike and Eleven are madly in love and it’s obvious to everyone except each other.” [THIS ONE IS SO GREAT. HONESTLY.]

1985* by EvieSmallwood: “The DOE may have left Hawkins, but the mysteries and horrors have not. Darkness still lingers in the heart of Will Byers, and something else lurks in the shadows…”

three hundred and fifty three* by argenttmccall: “(almost) a year’s worth of getting used to the New Normal. it takes them a while, but they’ll get there.”

cherubim by veausy: “Reaching out one finger carefully, El brushed it over his bottom lip, watching pink skin stretch under the pressure. Mike stayed asleep.”

four in the morning by cali-chan (girls_are_weird): ““You want me to get some sleep and go to school today? Then take me to the cabin. Please,” he was all but begging.”

kinda like a promise by cali-chan (girls_are_weird): ““Like a secret?” “Yeah, but a good one. Like… it means more because it’s just between the two of us. It’s special.” January 1985 brings holiday-break afternoons at the Hoppers’.”

if you love the girl by cali-chan (girls_are_weird): ““You should try not to get mad, you know. They only tease you because it gets such a rise out of you. But when you look past all the annoying stuff, they’re actually really happy for you.””

they are part of Mike, Eleven, and the quiet moments series, which is awesome. Check it out.

nos adducere lucem* by richiewheeler (jormaperalta): “What happens when the headlights dim, the shadow leaves, and the gate closes.”

love you like a love song* by FateChica: “For 353 days, Mike has lived without El. For 353 days, El has watched from afar and wished. Then the counting ends and the rest of their lives begin.”

something strange in your neighborhood by vapoir: “Eleven goes out on halloween after all.”

not half-way happy, just happy* by GhostHunterxoxo: “A retelling of Mike and El’s reunion and goodbye before she fights the Mind Flayer.”

word of the day* by emmaofmisthaven: “aftermath: the period that follows an unpleasant event or accident, and the effects that it causes.”

power cut* by PureShores: “Since returning from the Upside Down, El’s powers haven’t been the same. She worked so hard to return to them. Will her friends still want her once they find out?”

what a night! by SmoothFluffle: “0.09 of BAC?! What were these kids thinking? How did Lucas even think of driving?!”

and its sequel monday after by SmoothFluffle: “The group of bruised teens made quite a sight as they discussed their morning while eating their lunches.” [both fanfics are more general and AV-club-focused than strictly Mileven, but they are really good and worth a read.]

ours* by Once_In_A_Lifetime_Or_4Ever: “Small bits of El and Mike’s life.”

eleven & company by solangewrites: “Eleven survives the Demogorgon and has to learn to adjust to ‘normal’ life with her friends. Includes shopping, female friends, and many, many not-so-subtle pop culture references.”

don’t worry anymore, child* by SingerOnTheRise: “El was back, but not the way Mike Wheeler expected. She did not know who he was and, in fact, she did not even know who she was.” [gotta be honest, the English here…it’s not the greatest, but the concept itself is fresh and interesting, and the story is worth a look.]

alternative universe:

i think i’m in love (again)* by sinclairsmax: “There he stood, at the door with his curly hair gelled back. The room fell silent, and Elle Byers stepped forward. “Mike?”” Reverse AU.

find a way* by Booklover1217: “El Ives, once known as Jane, has always been running, running and hiding from the past that has continued to haunt and hunt her for her entire life. She never let herself get attached, knowing everything could be ripped away from her in seconds, as it had been time and time again. But that was until she met Mike Wheeler, and everything changed.”

something good by helplessly: “Dustin doesn’t tell them that the newest person hoping to fill the empty room in their student home is a girl.” College No Supernatural AU.

in dreams* by frankiethebard: “Mike can feel his friendships drifting apart, but when his literal dream girl turns out to be real, desperately in need of his help, Mike must gather the party to save her.” High School AU.

take me home by Booklover1217: “El Hopper, once only known by the number Eleven, has been hiding from her past for almost a year, a year where she has lived as nothing more than a lifeless zombie. Now, someone has come back into her life asking for her help, and she can’t refuse. Will she find her missing friend? And, in the process, will she find the very person who will help her come back to life?” Soulmates AU.

if anyone is listening by lovelysarcastic: ““I can see it now,” I said, leaning against the bathroom’s door. Mike, who was brushing his teeth, gave me a short, confused look. “What?” “Why I fell in love with you.”” No Some Supernatural AU.

most magical place by TheMikeWheelers (jasongracefully): “Mike, Will, Lucas, Dustin, and El take a trip to Disney World.” vaguely canonical and yet not quite canon AU.

crossover:

imperio by serendipitous_rambles: “Mike first saw her on the platform at King’s Cross and ever since he’s been under her spell.” Stranger Things x Harry Potter Crossover.

and its sequel/tie-in one-shot accio by serendipitous_rambles: “Where the Party meet the Golden Trio.”

011* by PaladinofFarore: “The 011 tattooed on her arm had always been a painful reminder to her. A remnant of the enslavement she’d escaped. To the world, it would be the name of one of earth’s mightiest heroes.” Stranger Things x Avengers Crossover.

+ bonus: Wherein, the Wheeler family is featured prominently:

you found me in the rain by bananannabeth: “Jane ‘El’ Hopper is new to Hawkins, but when she shows up on the Wheelers’ doorstep in the middle of a storm Karen gets the feeling that she’s seen her somewhere before.”

and its sequel favorite by bananannabeth: “When Karen Wheeler runs into Steve Harrington at the supermarket and finds out that he’s home alone, she does what any good mother would do and invites him to dinner with her family. It’s definitely not awkward, because Nancy has gone out with Jonathan for the night, which makes things better, not worse. Right? Mike doesn’t think so.”

both are part of the You Can Talk To Me (aka. Karen Wheeler is a Good Mom™) series.

my name is el by PureShores: “Karen (with a little help from Mike) learns how to communicate with her newest houseguest.”

worse things* by Ethosa: “The Wheeler parents are killed after insubordination in the hands of Brenner and his cronies. Mike and Nancy live as fugitives.”

screw that by EvieSmallwood: “It’s 1985, and the Wheeler family is pretty much in shambles.”

love is not for the impatient by writeyourheart: “After Ted cheats on Karen, Mike finds himself fearful of both his his feelings for Eleven and what it means to be in love.”

UPDATE: part IV is out.

#mileven #mileven fanfiction #mileven fanfiction recommendation list #mileven fanfiction recommendation #character: mike wheeler #character: eleven #pairing: mike x eleven #tv: stranger things #fanfiction recommendations #in this tag resides fanfiction #♔: victrix #*

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mayquita · 6 years

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Looking For A Smile

Surprise @awkwardnessandbaseball !! I'm your Secret Santa! I've decided to post your gift today because I'm leaving town tomorrow and I didn't know if I would have time to do it properly, so here it is. I'm a little nervous because this is something a bit different from what I usually write, so I hope you like it. It has been a pleasure to share these messages with you during the last weeks. Merry Christmas to everyone!

This is unbeta’d so apologize in advance for all the mistakes.

@saraswans , you’re the best, thank you for everything

Summary: The first time Killian sees her, he thinks she is just a tourist, strolling the streets of Storybrooke camera in hand. Soon, he discovers that this enigmatic woman is much more than that. Modern AU.

Ao3 / FFnet

When Killian sees her for the first time, he thinks she's just a tourist, strolling the streets of Storybrooke camera in hand. There's something different about her, though, an enigmatic halo perhaps. However, he has no time to observe her carefully since she disappears into the crowd in the blink of an eye.

As he immerses himself in his daily routine, he doesn't think about her again in the next few days, the moment too short for his brain to hold it back.

Three days later he sees her again. His first impression is discarded when he allows himself to observe her more closely. He is an observer, after all. And a story creator. Although he no longer has anyone to tell his tales. Not anymore.

No, she definitely is not a tourist. He can assure it now, after finding her three days in a row.

She follows a kind of pattern. First, she wanders through the streets, merged with the crowd. It's strange that no one notices a person who takes pictures in the middle of the street. But sometimes people are too busy or too submerged in their own concerns that they hardly notice what they have in front of them. That happens even in small towns such as in Storybrooke where the pace of life is much quieter than in a big city. Or perhaps she is a kind of ghost or spirit and he alone has received the strange privilege of contemplating her.

She then heads to the docks, her camera pointing towards the ocean, he supposes taking some photos. Finally, she stays for a few minutes facing the horizon.

Three days of observation allow him to begin to create several stories, to imagine what lies behind that enigmatic woman. He is used to it, old habits die hard. She could be a reporter for a travel magazine, or a rookie spy who has not yet learned to camouflage herself. Or a millionaire bored of her tedious life who entertains herself immortalizing the lives of other people. For some reason, though, none of these stories seems to fit her.

On the fourth day, he does not see her through the streets of the town. He is busier that day, so he must put aside his observer work at least for a while. With the sunset, he walks back to his ship —to his house— when a vision leaves him paralyzed. She, the mysterious woman, is there, on the dock, her camera directed towards his own ship. Killian remains frozen a few feet away, doubting whether to approach or continue his observation without interrupting her. In the end, his curiosity is more powerful.

He walks a few steps towards her. When he is close enough, he rests his arms on the railing and directs his gaze toward his ship. For some reason, he is nervous, his heart beats faster, the desire to scratch behind his ear almost so hard that he finds it difficult to suppress it. After a quiet sigh, he speaks.

"She's beautiful, isn't she?"

The only hint that she has heard him is a slight tremor in the hand holding the camera, her shoulders shaking almost imperceptibly.

There is no other reaction on her part for the next few seconds. He begins to doubt even if she is aware of his presence. After what seems an eternity, she turns to him. And that's when his heart stops working. Her eyes, of an intense green color, searching his gaze with a certain hint of curiosity. There is something else there, but he can't discern it since his eyes drift to her lips, which have begun to move.

"So is that a she?" She tilts her head a little, waiting for his answer.

"Aye, The Jolly Roger." He affirms suppressing a chuckle, a hint of pride slips in his words. She is his house, after all.

"Yeah, I can see the name." She points to the hull where the name appears in black.

She doesn’t ask him if he owns the boat and he doesn’t question what she does there. She does not look upset, but her gaze now turns to the horizon, as if she were lost in thought. After a few seconds, she gives him a half smile and walks away. No more words between them.

Killian doesn't see her for the next two days. He begins to fear that somehow he scared the enigmatic woman when he caught her watching his ship. On the third day, however, she appears again at the docks. She is looking at the sea leaning on the railing, her blond mane and her red leather jacket are unmistakable. He regroups again the courage to approach her.

The look she gives him this time is far from resembling the first one. Where once there was an intense green with sparks of vitality now there are red-rimmed eyes, a dull look. He also detects that she does not carry her camera.

"Where's your camera?" The words come out of his mouth before he can do anything to stop them. It’s not the smartest question he can ask, he thinks as he checks her reaction, her features drawing a gesture of sadness.

She studies him for a moment, perhaps deciding whether to trust him or not. Finally, she mutters as she turns her gaze back to the horizon. "I was so stupid to leave the camera on one of the tables of that diner. I needed to go to the toilet. When I returned, the camera was gone." Her words come in a whisper so subtle that he almost confuses them with the murmur of the sea breeze.

"That device is important to you, isn’t it?" It’s a rhetorical question, he is aware. By all answer, she lets out a snort — that sounds more like a muffled sob— and starts to walk away.

"Wait!" He is reluctant to let her go. Not yet. "Can I ask you something?"

She turns and stares at him for a few seconds. Her gaze is still sad, but he would swear he has detected a spark of vivacity again. "You can, but you may or may not receive an answer."

"Fair enough." He pauses for a moment, sensing that there will be a point of no return from this instant. "I wonder... what you're looking for through the lens of your camera."

She doesn't respond at first and his heart falls to his stomach when he thinks he has missed his chance to approach her. But suddenly the corners of her lips rise subtly. "Smiles... I'm looking for smiles. And the horizon." Without further ado, she walks away, leaving him with even more questions, but also with a purpose, to find the thief. He knows whom to address. He’s an observer after all.

He only needs a couple of days to find him. It's not a difficult task in a town as small as Storybrooke. Will, that's the name of the town thief. He doesn't steal out of necessity or greed. He does it simply because he can. He finds him in an alley, a camera in one hand and a phone near his ear in the other. Killian doesn't wait for the call to end. It's better to catch him off guard. So without more, he spits, “can I see the photos that the device contains inside?" He points at the camera with his right hand, while his gaze stays fixed on the thief.

Will's reaction is immediate, he runs off as he drops the camera on his escape. The device falls on a trash bag, avoiding the impact against the ground. In this simple way, Killian recovers the camera. It’s not his most skillful performance, but the goal is fulfilled. He doesn't expect her to think of him as a white knight who has come to her rescue. But the camera and its contents seem important to her. So he does what he should do.

Two days later, he finds her in the same place, this time sitting on a bench in the pier. He approaches and offers her the camera. Her reaction takes his breath away for a few seconds. Her face lights up in such a way and her eyes shine with such intensity that he is unable to look away. He shouldn't be proud, his only merit has been knowing where to look. But he cannot prevent a wave of pride washes over him. His action, however minimal, has caused a positive effect on her.

She does not ask how he got it, simply thanks him and gives him a warm smile, clearly indicating that his presence there is welcome, so he accepts her silent invitation and sits by her side.

"Can I ask you something?" Killian repeats the same question of two days ago. It seems like that's their only way to communicate for the moment, so he accepts it.

"You can, but you may or may not receive an answer." She obviously responds in the same way. He didn't expect anything else, but her smile lingers on her lips, so that encourages him to continue.

"What’s your name?"

"Is that your question?" She raises one of her eyebrows teasing him.

"Well, if we exchange our names we will never be strangers anymore."

"Maybe it's the best, keeping us as strangers."

He nods but doesn’t give up, his curiosity is too strong. He has an ace up his sleeve, something he doesn't feel particularly proud of, but he uses it nonetheless. "Perhaps gratitude is in order now."

She lets out a snort as she rolls her eyes. "So you want my name as a gratitude for returning my camera."

Although her words do not come in the form of a question but confirmation, he nods with a shrug. "It's fair enough, isn't it?"

She then gets up and starts walking. He holds his breath, thinking he may have pushed her too hard. A few seconds later she turns, the sea breeze playing with her curls, so she tucks a piece of hair behind her ear. "It's Emma, Emma Swan."

The way her name slides between her lips, like a melody, and the light of the sunset giving her silhouette an ethereal halo makes him wonder if he really is not contemplating a gosht, or a vision. He blinks a couple times, and she's still there, her lips flatten out in an attempt of a smile. She is waiting, he finally realizes. She's waiting for his name.

"Swan, it suits you. Killian Jones is my name."

“See you around, Jones.” Before turning and walking away, she smiles at him again. She, Emma, doesn’t look back.

The next day they meet again on the same bench. Although he has gotten her name, Emma Swan is still a mystery to him, so he intends to know her a little more. His ability to create stories doesn’t work with her. Or maybe, he doesn’t want to create a fictional story with a happy ending for her. Maybe it's time to know a real tale. He begins the conversation in the same way as in previous days.

"Can I ask you something?"

"You can, but you may or may not receive an answer."

"You said the other day that you were looking for smiles. Why?"

Her face keeps a thoughtful expression for a few seconds. Then she tilts her head, her eyes searching for his, a spark of defiance in her gaze. "I've noticed that you observe people. Why?"

And there it is, a proof that she had also noticed him. Killian cannot suppress his lips forming a grin. He does not mind answering, not really. In fact, this can be a kind of catharsis. It's been a long time since he's expressed these thoughts out loud, so he takes a few seconds to respond.

"Well, the answer could be quite long."

She shrugs. "I don’t mind, it's not like I have anything better to do." She leans back against the back of the bench, resting her head against her palm, her gaze directed at him, a sign that she is ready to listen.

"Okay, I'll tell you my story if you tell me yours later."

“Deal.”

He can’t do other than trust her to fulfill her part of the bargain. After clearing his throat, he turns his gaze to the horizon, his mind, though, travels several years ago.

"It's just a habit. I learned it from my brother Liam." He pauses for a second, the mention of his brother always has the effect of drying his throat and moisten his eyes in the form of contained tears. "For a while, it was just him and me, no one else to take care of us. He began to develop an idea for the purpose of distracting his little brother in the endless summer afternoons. He asked me to choose a random person from among the many who passed down the street. Then, he used that person as the main character and created a story just for me. He invented a life for that person that started from the moment I chose it. It was a story with a happy ending, of course. That was their purpose, after all, to ensure that, for a moment, our lives were not so miserable, to get us to experience full happiness, even through other people's”

"And you have taken that habit back then? Do you observe and create stories?" She gives him an understanding look.

There is much more in his story, but a sudden melancholy seizes him, preventing him to continue. Maybe some other day he'll tell her the next chapter, though. Meanwhile, he just nods. "Aye. I like to think that some of those created stories do come true. Maybe the chosen person dies the next minute hit by a bus. But there are many other possibilities. To think that my story might be one of those possibilities is enough for me.”

After his confession, a quiet silence reigns over them. He thinks that Emma is not going to fulfill her part of the deal, but after letting out a sigh, she speaks.

"I... I like to capture the moment, to immortalize that instant when a genuine smile appears, a proof that, whatever happens before or after, that person was happy for a moment."

There is much more than that. He can say it when a cloud of sadness crosses her gaze. He does not push her, though. "And what about the horizon?"

"I like the sea. It has a calming effect on me." She simply responds.

"We make quite the team, Swan."

"We do?"

"Of course love." He replies in an exaggerated tone, as if the answer were obvious. "I offer a chance to happiness through these stories and you immortalize that happiness, capturing the moment and making it eternal. I tell you, Swan, quite the team.”

They continue with that routine over the next few days. Now, when they see each other in the distance, he observing and she taking photos, both wave or share glances and smiles of complicity. They even meet by chance in places like Granny's. On these occasions, they sit in the same booth. And they talk about everything and nothing, their respective coffees abandoned and cold on the table.

One day the pattern changes and it's Emma who asks first. "Can I ask you something?"

"You can, but you may or may not receive an answer." He emulates her previous answer because how not? Although he will answer any questions she asks. Killian earns a laugh on her part. He then realizes that he needs to hear that sound more often.

"When you first saw me, did you think of any story for me?"

"Aye, too many stories, indeed. But for some reason, none of them seemed to fit with you."

"Would you tell me any of them?" The way she addresses him, with a mixture of curiosity and hope and a special glow in her eyes makes it impossible for him to reject her request.

So he tells her not one but all the stories he created based on her. Her reactions vary from almost laughing to widening her eyes with surprise or shaking her head in disagreement, but without losing her smile. I would never do that, Jones. He cannot deny it, he likes the effect his stories cause in her. He could spend hours inventing stories just to keep that smile on her lips.

After a few seconds of silence, broken only by the sound of the sea and the echo of her previous laughter in his ears, Killian asks. "Do I appear in some of your photos?" There is a deeper meaning in that question and he is not sure he wants to know the answer but he asks nevertheless.

Her gaze is full of understanding when she responds. "Yeah, in several, mostly on your boat, other times while talking to the librarian or when you come across that couple, the short-haired woman and the blond-haired man."

"The Nolan." He offers.

Emma nods. "They look pretty nice."

Yes, they're nice, like Belle, the librarian. He is surprised by the answer, though. Not because he thinks he doesn't smile, but because he would never have considered them as genuine smiles of happiness. He didn't come to this town in search of happiness, in fact, he thought he would never get it again, his heart broken and his soul empty. But maybe his feelings are starting to change.

"See that man, the one with a red hat? Tell me his story, Killian." She asks him one day, after having had an intense conversation in which both have shared memories of their past, not the most painful parts, he suspects. Not on his part, at least. Sometimes it's better if the old demons stay buried.

He looks in the direction Emma is pointing at and finds a man leaning on the railing, looking out to the sea. He narrows his eyes and studies his posture and his expression intently. Little by little, a story begins to form in his head.

"This man is a sailor, a seaman, and he has spent most of his life on the high seas. It seems, though, that bad luck hangs over him and he hasn't been able to get on board for a while. He looks at the horizon, remembering the countless adventures he has experienced in the ocean and dreaming that someday, he will be able to sail again. Two days later, his bad luck is over. A sailboat arrives at the port, at his command, an adventurer captain with a lot of free time and too much money. He is looking for a small crew to accompany him on his next adventure, a trip around the world sailing on his ship. And that's how our man with the red hat gets back to his beloved sea.”

"Whoa, you have quite the story there. I like it, it suits him." At that moment, Emma raises her camera and points directly at the man. "Got it."

It seems to be a day of confessions because, after a brief silence, Emma begins to speak. "I... I was looking for a particular smile. When I came here I was just looking for someone." Killian senses a slight shake in her voice, but she continues, a nostalgic expression on her face and a gleam of sadness in her gaze. "As I told you before, I grew up in the system... I... got pregnant very young, while I was in prison for a crime I hadn't committed... I couldn't keep that baby. I had no future to offer him so I gave him up for a closed adoption trying to give him his best chance."

He knows that the story is not over, so he simply nods and silently encourages her to continue.

"It was easy for a while. After leaving prison, my main concern was to find a way of life that would allow me to move on. The first few years I managed to bury my regret with work, but as time passed, every time I saw a child on the street, the memory of my son came to torment me. I began to feel guilty and I kept asking myself if I really had done the right thing, if I really had given my son his best chance. So, after a few investigations, I got something, just a name, Storybrooke. That's how I got here."

She is looking for her son. More specifically, she is looking for the genuine smile of her son, to make sure that she made the right decision. It's a bittersweet story, he thinks uneasily. But there is something that doesn't fit into all this. Killian is aware that Emma takes pictures not only of children but of other people. Before he can express his doubt out loud, she continues.

"I don't even know what I was looking for in the beginning. It was like looking for a needle in a haystack, I don't even know what my son looks like. Maybe that's why, while trying to locate him among the crowd, I began to observe people and I was surprised by the reasons why some people smiled, so I started looking for smiles. Since I didn't find my son's at least I could immortalize the happiness of other people."

Killian's heart tightens after hearing her story, while a wave of affection washes over him. She is waiting for his reaction, if her hesitant gaze is an indicative. Little by little, a goal begins to draw in his mind, he's going to help her find her son.

"You can still find him, you know. It looks like a small town, but there are several children around your child's age." He trusts that the smile he offers her will be reassuring enough. "I offer my observation skills to help you in your purpose. I'm going to help you find your boy, love."

Her lips draw a tentative smile as a pleading shadow crosses her gaze. "Would you do it?" When he nods firmly, her shoulders fall slightly, as if discharging part of the burden she had been carrying. That encourages him in a certain way, maybe if he also talks about his past he may feel lighter.

So on this day of confessions, he also shares his. The words escape from his lips in a fluid way, demonstrating how easy it's to talk to Emma. They have known each other for barely a month, but there's a connection between them that makes it possible for him to feel closer to her than he has been with any other person in a long time.

Killian tells her that his brother died when he was still too young, leaving him alone in the world, with no one else to tell him stories. It was then that he began to acquire that practice of observing people and building their happy endings. He also tells her how he met his first love, and a future full of promises opened before them. That future did not last long, though. A car accident took his love and his left hand. And again, he was left alone in the world, heartbroken and with no one to share his stories with.

"We make quite the team." She repeats the same words that he used a few weeks before, getting his lips to lift slightly despite the pain of bringing his old demons to the surface. To his relief, her soft voice and warm smile have not a shred of pity, only understanding.

After their confessions, they continue with their routine, but little by little, something is changing between them. He feels more and more close to her, his heart beats faster every time he sees her, while his stomach flutters violently. She seems to feel the same effect, always looking for his gaze, always looking for a casual contact from their hands. He does not want to give a name to this feeling that is still blooming, but it's getting harder to be separated from her, if only for a few hours.

A week later, they are sitting on the bench they have already made theirs, looking at the horizon. There are no words shared among them, sometimes all they need is to feel the presence of the other at their side as a perpetual support.

Suddenly, he feels Emma's hand squeezing his leg slightly. Confused, he looks for her eyes, but she is no longer looking at the horizon but at something different. He follows the direction of her gaze and meets two people, a boy, and a woman. They're having an ice cream while walking by the docks. The realization of what they are contemplating washes over him. He doesn't need confirmation to know that Emma has finally found her son.

"Tell me his story, Killian." She pleads in a strangled whisper, without looking away from her son, while holding her camera ready to capture that unique moment. That bittersweet instant.

He closes his eyes for a moment and lets his mind wander for a few seconds, while a story begins to form. He knows the woman, after more than four months in Storybrooke it would be impossible not to know who is the mayor of the town. But she is a reserved and a bit haughty person, reluctant to share her life, so he hardly knows anything about her. Maybe it's better that way because he can offer a genuine story to Emma.

"She is the mayor of the town." It's the only thing he can affirm with certainty. "She... she decided to adopt for the wrong reasons. It was a selfish act with the aim of filling her wounded heart, to find someone who loved her without reservation. In spite of this, at the moment in which the little boy came into her life, she started to change. Where there was darkness before, now there is light. Her son has become the center of her life."

Although Emma doesn't look away from her son, he knows that she is listening to him, or at least that is what he senses while seeing a silent tear running down her cheek. Suddenly, he feels how she stiffens and raises her camera, ready to capture the moment she has been waiting for so long. And there it is, that smile. He doesn't need Emma's skills to be certain that the smile that appears on the child's lips is a genuine one. And it's addressed to his adoptive mother.

He feels the need to do something for Emma, to brush away her tears, to hold her in his arms... Instead, he offers her something she can cling to, hope. That is his function, after all, to generate a ray of hope through his stories, creating a happy ending within the infinite world of possibilities. Maybe it will come true, maybe not. But his instinct is strong and silently shouts that this time his story and reality will run parallel paths until they converge on a point. He just hopes that he can witness it.

"He's a happy lad, he has everything he could wish for. He also knows his history and his origins. For that reason, some days, he looks out the window and observes the town with longing. He likes to think that maybe, somewhere in the world, there's someone who also looks with yearning towards the streets full of people. That maybe there's a person who is looking for him. He is a patient boy and is confident that, when the right time comes, that person, his biological mother, will find him."

Silence falls over them while he holds his breath, waiting for her reaction. "Thank you." She mumbles while wiping away her tears. The moment has passed, the boy and his mother are no longer in sight and it seems that this is the moment for Emma to leave as well. "I have to go." She whispers, as she gets up and walks away without looking back.

He doesn't try to stop her. But he begins to feel an uneasiness that tightens his heart while a terrible thought takes hold of him. He feels helpless but cannot do anything but wait the next day and trust that, even though she has already fulfilled her mission of capturing the genuine smile she was looking for, there is something else that makes her stay.

When Killian approaches their bench the next day, there is someone else there. Emma. She is still there. He represses the impulse to jump for joy and instead approaches with slow steps. The moment he arrives at her side, Emma looks up, the corners of her lips rising slightly. She carries a folder in her hands. He pulls his lips into a soft smile as accepts the folder she hands him while sitting next to her.

"I've thought to bring this to you as gratitude for your story from yesterday." He opens the folder and is surprised to see its contents. There're photos where he himself appears, and most importantly, he is smiling. Killian seems happy while talking to Belle, the librarian, or the Nolan. He also sports a placid smile as he contemplates the sea in another of the photos. He swallows the growing knot in his dry throat, as emotion seizes him.

"I wanted to show you that you are not alone anymore. I think you have already found your place in this town." Emma is smiling, a soft smile that goes straight to his heart. His gaze then drifts to her lips, wondering, not for the first time, what it would be like to kiss her. There is an almost irrepressible impulse that begins to take hold of him. Instead, he decides a path perhaps more subtle.

"Can I ask you something?"

Emma is grinning now, instantly recognizing their little game. She doesn't disappoint, of course, responding as expected. "You can, but you may or may not receive an answer."

"I've been thinking. Since your mission to find a genuine smile has been successfully solved, you could start a new mission. What do you think about looking for kisses that mean something?"

Her eyes widen in surprise, but, fortunately, she seems to have caught the hint. Her gaze also goes to his lips getting his heart to race with anticipation. "Uhm, it's not a bad idea. Maybe you can help me with the first attempt." Emma suggests with a tone of voice that would make it impossible to reject it.

She doesn't wait for an answer though. Instead, she approaches until she is within inches of him. And before he is aware of it, her lips are on his causing an electric shock to travel throughout his whole body. He's lost in the softness of her lips, in her sweet taste, in the number of sensations that the kiss brings with it, sensations that he already thought forgotten but that now return making him want much more. The kiss ends too soon, though.

"I forgot something." Emma's voice caresses his lips, while their foreheads remain in contact. "I'm afraid we're going to have to repeat since I forgot to take the picture."

He happily obliges, of course. And while their lips come into contact again as Emma raises her hand holding the phone and pointing towards them, he sets a new goal, to get a genuine smile from Emma every day and to make their kisses, because he is sure that from now on there will be lots of them, always mean something.

Thanks for reading :)

#cs ff #cs au #captain swan ff #cs au ff #cssecretsanta #csss2017 #mayquita writes #my cs writings

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