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letstalkaboutshtufff · 2 months

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Not Weak

Highschool Gojo x reader classmate

Pairing: Gojo x reader (this can be seen as romantic or platonic since I didn’t really specify. I do like platonic friendship stories a lot tho)

Summary: You are trying your very hardest to catch up to your classmates and not get left behind.

Warnings: language, mentions of a little blood, fainting kinda

Hope you guys enjoy!

*************************************************

Pathetic. There was really no other way to put it. Truly and utterly pathetic was what you were. All this training and yet you could barely summon any energy.

At this rate you’d only be able to defeat a raccoon.

“Ugh why can’t I do it…” you slump down on the tree, the target in front of you barely scratched.

You were a first year like your classmates, Gojo, Geto and Shoko but for some reason they were all improving and you were still stuck in the same place like a fly in mud. Your family had a technique, ice manipulation (excuse me while I make things up) but for some reason you were the only person who wasn’t an instant prodigy. It was extremely discouraging, especially when Gojo and Geto were so strong already.

“Hey snowflake, you’re getting better, almost felt a little chill there for a second”

“Gojo… did you come here just to make fun of me?”

“Aw cmon I wouldn’t do that, just wanted to see what you were up to, you weren’t at breakfast.”

“Just training… I’m close to a breakthrough I can feel it”

“Well do us all a favor and figure it out soon because this heat has been killing me- would love a personal air conditioner”

“You threw a rock aimed at his head which of course bounced off thanks to his new trick, infinity.”

“Rude” you just rolled your eyes and moved to stand again, ready to try again.

“Satoru stop picking on y/n” Geto emerged from the trees.

“Huh? I’m not picking on her, if anything she’s bullying me!”

“Yeah like that’s believable…” Shoko popped out behind Geto. Cigarette hanging from her lips.

“Great you’re all here…” you mumbled. Now you can all witness my patheticness…

“We didn’t see you all day, we got worried” shoko ever the sweet one looked at you concerned.

“Well I’m fine” you said with a bit more bite than you meant to.

“Ooh someone’s in a mood”

“Leave her alone Gojo she’s working hard unlike you”

“Why you little-“

“It’s not exactly a lie though is it”

“You to suguru?!? I thought you guys were my friends!”

During their little scuffle you snuck away. Your mind on one thing and one thing only. Getting your damn technique to work.

Once you were far enough away you positioned yourself towards a large boulder.

Ok breathe in

Breathe out

Focus

You raised your hand towards the boulder.

Focus

Prickles travelled up your arm towards your hand.

Ok now build the energy in the palm

Hold it

Don’t lose it come on!

Focus!

You trembled trying to control the energy

“FUCK” you felt your body jerk heavily and the energy disappear completely, like it did every damn time before you could even send it out.

You doubled over breathing heavily.

Why?! Why couldn’t you do it!? Were you always going to be this weak??? No, no you couldn’t… if you did they’d leave you behind… you couldn’t be left behind….

Again. You had to try again.

“Ok, focus” you repeated this cycle about a hundred more times or so it felt. It was nighttime but you were still at it.

Just……one……more…..time…..

“Urgh” you collapsed onto your hands and knees. Blood droplets coated the grass. You coughed a few more times before continuing your ritual.

Again… one more time…

But this time when you rose you stumbled and fell again.

Pathetic. Come you useless sorcerer get up. Every bone in your body was screaming but you ignored it completely and rose once more.

Focus

Foc-

Suddenly your target boulder blurred and you felt yourself tipping to the side.

“Woah hey, you ok?” Gojo…. What was he doing here. And most importantly why couldn’t you speak.

He held you upright and leaned down to look at your face,

“You look like hell…” his eyes gleamed in the darkness, appraising your sorry state.

“Mmfine” you slurred unconvincing.

“Hm yeah sure you are…” Gojo said sarcastically.

“Come on, let’s go find Shoko.”

“I don’t nee-“ your world spin again and gojo gripped you tighter so you wouldn’t fall.

“You were saying?” He raised an amused brow.

You sighed, there wasn’t really much training you could do when you couldn’t stand…

You nodded half heartedly in Gojos direction. You tried taking a step and stumbled,

“Alright stubborn Bambi up we go”

Ah!?

“Gojo I can walk, let me down!” His long legs easily carried you both across the training field in record time.

“Stop moving or I’ll drop you geez”

“Gojo-“you sighed in defeat. Hating yourself even more for getting dizzy again and being forced to lean your head on his chest.

“Don’t wake shoko… just need sleep…” you whispered but you knew he heard it”

He looked down at you and thought for a moment.

“Uh you sure? You were coughing up blood you know…”

“Mm sure…” you mumbled already halfway to lala land. For trash like him, he sure did smell good…

“Ok fine but in the morning you should at least let her-….aaaaand you’re asleep.” He sighed, watching the steady rise and fall of your chest. He frowned a bit at your state. He knew you were trying but some people just weren’t cut out for this line of work. He wasn’t trying to be mean or anything, it was just the truth…

He knew you wouldn’t take that well if he told you that though. Ugh why did things have to be so complicated!?!

****************************************************

The next morning you felt like a hundred bricks were weighing you down.

You groaned as you tried to sit up. Every single part of you ached.

You vaguely remembered last night with Gojo. Heat rose shamefully to your cheeks. How embarrassing it was that he had to carry you and to top it off you fell asleep on him!? How were you going to face him ugh…

It took about a hour for pain meds to kick in enough for you to shower, change and promptly make your way to the training grounds again. You would make sure this time though you wouldn’t push yourself to the point of collapsing.

Ten minutes later you were in front of the same boulder in the same position.

Familiar pinprickles soon formed in your palm

Focus…

Foc-

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Fuck

Your concentration was abruptly broken by the unmistakable voice of your midnight savior.

“training duh” you said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Are you really that eager to fall into my arms again?”

You rolled your eyes and turned towards him,

“That was… well I guess I should be thanking you… sorry for the trouble last night…” you mumbled scratching the back of your neck.

“Mm I’d believe you expect for the fact that you seem eager to repeat last nights fiasco.”

“I’m fine now… I’ll know when I should stop…”

That was a lie, you both knew it.

You turned back to your target hoping that Gojo would leave you alone.

Palm raised up

Focus

Just a bit more…

Almost there…

Ah! Your body jerked like it did every freakin time and you let out a labored breath.

Gojo watched silently from the sidelines

You tried a few more times, your breathing and now coughing getting worse and worse each breath.

Finally when he felt you truly were at your limit again he decided to stop you.

Your eyes widened in surprise at the hand clutching your wrist because honestly you thought he had left awhile ago.

“What ….are you ….doing…?” You asked between heavy breaths.

“You’re gonna pass out if you keep going”

“I won’t… I’m ok really, just a few more then I’ll stop…”

“Yeah no, that’s not happening,”

“Let go, seriously it’s fine, I need to train-“

“When did you become more stubborn than me huh?” You tried pulling but he wouldn’t budge.

“If I let go are you gonna stop?”

“…… yes”

“You’re a horrible liar” he deadpanned.

“Ugh just quit it Gojo! Don’t you have better things to do than babysit me?? Can’t you see I’m trying to train over here??” You were starting to get really annoyed now.

“….” Should he say it? Should he say that maybe you weren’t cut out for this life? That maybe you should quit trying? Could he say it? It would break you he knew but better a broken you than a dead one….

You saw the change in his eyes and gulped suddenly uneasy, “what…?”

“Maybe…. Maybe it’s time to stop…” in his defense, he really was thinking about what’s best for you.

But you on the other hand…

Your eyes were wide as saucers. His words echoed like a deadly bell that sealed your worst nightmare. He said only a few words but you understood the deeper meaning behind them in an instant.

Weak

Pathetic

Useless

He and everyone else knew it

And now you were going to be left behind.

Against your will tears beagn to burn in your eyes.

“Y-You-“ but the words choked in your throat.

“I w-won’t” you whispered, hot tears now streaming down your cheeks while you yanked your hand away from him and he finally let you.

He looked at you with a face you hated more than anything, pity…

“Stop it….” You felt your emotions start to rise.

“Stop looking at me like that! I will get strong! I won’t stop! I can’t stop! So don’t you of all people tell me to stop!”

“Ok, listen I’m sorry, just calm down alright,” he held his hands up trying to calm you but it just make you angrier.

“No- I won’t calm down! You don’t get to come here and tell me I’m weak when I’ve been trying my hardest to get stronger! Not everyone is a prodigy like you Gojo!! But mark my words I’m going to kick your ass one day and make you regret ever underestimating me!!”

“I’m not trying to call you weak-“

“JUST SHUT UP ALREADY, CANT YOU YOU’RE ONLY MAKING THINGS WORSE! JUST GO ALREADY!”

“Y/n-”

“NO-ENOUGH! IM NOT WEAK! IM NOT WEAK IM NOT WEAK!!”

“CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH”

Both you and Gojo froze, eyes wide at the sudden noise. Slowly your heads turned simultaneously to the left where your hand was outstretched, towards the boulder- sorry correction- the pile of very teeny tiny rubble.

Wha??

“Gojo….”

“Y/n….”

You both slowly turned around to each other

Then promptly burst into excited smiles and loud laughter.

“I did it!!!”

“You did it!!!”

“I did it!!!!”

You jumped onto each other hugging and jumping up and down like children.

“See I told you I could do it!!!”

“You did didn’t you!?!!”

“I’m gonna be strong Gojo!! I will!!”

“You’ll be kicking my ass in no time!!”

You both were laughing like crazy people

*******

“Uhhh…. What the hell did we just walk in to….” -Shoko

“I’m not sure I even wanna know….”-Geto

- How I imagine them hugging lol

****************************************************

Hope you guys enjoyed! This was just a quick thing I wrote, was in the mood for some friendship fluff.

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crimsonxe · 2 months

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RT isn't going away cause:

they went "broke"

they rightfully kicked perverts/creeps/incels/and disgusting ass people to the curb

they dared to evolve in having various new talent

because people there failed at any damn thing

They're going away because David Zaslav's, a corpo piece of shit stuck in old media ignorant af of new media, bullshit view; where he gets to erase media via a pen stroke. Just like Batgirl, just like Coyote vs. Acme, Infinity Train, etc. May that piece of shit fall into a deep pit of a metaphorical hell and if WBD has any chance in hell of ever being taken seriously again may he be kicked to the goddamn curb where he belongs.

#roosterteeth #rooster teeth #david zaslav #wbd #fuck david zaslav

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shurisleftearring · 4 months

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Green Eyes Pt 2

a/n: Thank you so much for the love on the first part! I am so shocked by the love its gotten so far! I have many more parts to come! Enjoy! (Also bear with me it get juicier each part I promise) (Also I know that I’m late but better late then never 😚).

But I don't love you anymore, i'm so insecure, never knew that love did this...

Pairing: Shuri x Black!fem!reader

Word Count: 1k+

Summary : Five years. It’s been five years since the blip. And even longer since you’ve been in a relationship. Maybe it’s for the best. The last time you were in a relationship, it just ended in disarray. But, when your ex comes back into your life, can you start over and do it again? Or try to move on with an unexpected love?

Part one is pinned on my page!

You felt a certain sense of nervousness around Shuri now. Even though you were secure in yourself now, it just felt different. She was different.

“Hello…y/n?” Shuri said

You snapped out of the train of thought you were in.

“Huh?”

“I said do you like my car uthando?”

You had no idea what that meant but you were turned on by it. You loved it when she spoke her native language.

“It’s aight”

She chuckled “Just alright? Even though you were just gawking at it a minute ago?”

You shrugged.

Kaira felt all the of tension between the two of you.

“Well, sorry about that Your Majesty, it’s just stunning,” Kaira said breaking the silence

“No worries, and please call me Shuri,” Shuri said to Kaira

“Ok!” You could tell that she was trying to flirt with her eyes.

All you wanted to do at the moment was leave.

“Well, it’s late, see you around.” You said

Kair tried to wave goodbye, but you grabbed Kaira before she could do anything.

“See you around…” Shuri said.

She didn’t recognize you. Inside and out. She only recognizes you by the birthmark on your lower back that you rarely showed. Damn, after all of this time, she still remembers every little detail. She didn’t know what happened to you, but she was going to find out.

“y/n, she is fine as fuck! Can you introduce me?”

You just rolled your eyes. “No, let’s go”

_____________________________________

A few days later

It is your first day at Stark Industries and you already have two meetings, and four deadlines to meet. I guess they have been struggling since the infinity war.

“You have a meeting in five minutes,” says your assistant. You promised yourself that the assistant that you had at your old job would come here. He is the best there is, it’s just a guy plus he's black.

“Thank you, Anthony.”

You look at yourself in the mirror one last time and then go to the meeting room. You're fortunately early so you give yourself a little pep talk.

“You got this, this job will help you, not hurt you. You will become CEO soon, and won't have to deal with this bullshit.”

“You have a long way to go, my love.”

Shit. It’s Shuri.

“Stop calling me that, we're in a public place.”

“Oh, so you don’t mind in public?” She said smugly.

You hated her newfound cockyness. It was getting annoying.

“No, not anywhere. Shuri, let’s make something clear. We are not together, stop calling me these pet names.”

“...No.”

“Excuse me?”

“No uthando, no” -love

You knew she called You forgot how petty she was. You were having a staring contest with her and you were losing. She was just too fine.

“Hey ladies, I can see y’all are gay as fuck but please, let’s not be in the office.”

“Peter shut the hell up.” You say.

“How long has this been going on? Shuri only calls her girlfriends ‘love’”

“Nothing is going on I can assure you that”

Shuri is looking at you so smugly. “I mean..”

You looked at her “What the hell you mean ‘I mean’?”

“...We could've been at least engaged by now if it wasn’t for you ripping my heart out to shreds.”

“Excuse me?! It was your MOTHER who broke us apart. She told me never to contact you and to break up with you. That-”

“Don’t. Don’t you start y/n”

“OR WHAT? SHE RUINED MY LIFE. OUR RELATIONSHIP, MADE MY LIFE A LIVING HELL UNTIL I LEFT. FACE IT SHURI YOUR MOTHER IS A HOMOPHOBIC BITCH. SHE HATED ME AND MANIPULATED YOU AT EVERY TURN” you screamed.

“Y/N WATCH YOUR FUCKING MOUTH”

Peter was just watching in awe and confusion.

You and Shuri are now close. Your face is so close, your noses are touching.

Shuri was mad at you, but she knew that she was right. Her mother told her before she died about what she did. Then something clicked in Peter’s mind.

“...wait…y/n you don’t know?”

“I don’t know what Peter?” You said irritated.

“That Queen Rom-”

“SHUT UP PETER”

“What? She what?”

“Nothing” Shuri gritted through her teeth.

A massive silence fell until other people started coming in. You just sat down and looked away mad. Shuri just stormed out of the room. You just sat there in anger and confusion. What was Shuri hiding from you? What happened to her mom?

_____________________________________

After the meeting, you just felt drained, especially after that fight you had with Shuri. You just got into your apartment when your phone buzzed. What now? you thought. You kicked off your heels and put your coat on the rack. You looked at your phone to see that an unknown number texted you. Be downstairs in five, it’s important. You had a feeling it was Shuri. You were just drained and wanted to deal with it later. You set up your I’m drained the fuck out set up on the couch and was about to put on Living Single when your doorbell rang. You sighed and went to open the door. When you opened it, it was Shuri. “I told you to be ready in five. It’s been thirty minutes.”

“That should have been the green light to go. home. I don’t wanna deal with anything right now so please leave me alone.”

“No, we need to talk. NOW”

Her aggression took you aback.

“I said no Shuri” Shuri just sighed.

“Love, please, this is important” You gave her a look.

“...It’s about the project,” She said

You sighed and just looked at her.

“Fine, just let me try to look decent”

“Not you getting dolled up for me”

You just rolled you eyes and went into your bathroom to clean yourself up from the day. _____________________________________

Shuri felt bad for going off on you. I mean, you didn’t know that her mother was murdered. But, You still crossed a line and you needed to know that. Now that Shuri is going to be your boss, she can’t have you mad. It'll ruin your performance, plus, she wants to say pet names to you and not have to worry about another screeching match. You came out of your bedroom and holy shit. Every time she saw you, you fell in love with your curves, hips, and even how your ass jiggled when you walked. She missed that. She missed your hug and your smile. She just missed you.

“I’m ready,” you said

She could tell you were tired, but she couldn’t let you go to sleep mad at her.

“We won’t be out long, I promise”

“Yeah, yeah. Can we just go?”

_____________________________________

Y’all just came from the car and saw the restaurant. It was beautiful. The neon signs were your favorite.

“Wow, Shuri, this place is amazing.”

“I know, when I saw it I thought of you. Also, is gumbo still your favorite?”

Omg…you haven’t had gumbo in so long. Since you've been on that keto diet, you have forgotten what gumbo tastes like.

“They have gumbo here?” Your face lights up.

She whispered into your ear, “Yes, uthando”

You eventually get seated and then order a big pack of those dinner rolls. All of the hard work you put in is now gone once you eat the first roll. Your eyes start rolling back and Shuri can’t help but laugh.

“What have you been eating? Grass?”

You can’t even hear her. All you can think about is having another roll.

“Oh my, love slow down”

“These are so fucking good, oh my god!”

Shuri was having a field day, taking pictures, and laughing her ass off, she didn’t notice you had about 5-6 rolls.

“Well shit y/n”

You looked at the plate so embarrassed. It just hit how much of that you're gonna have to cut back to even make on how many pounds you ate.

“y/n it’s ok, you just got hungry. That’s all”

“No, I lost control”

“Look, I know that you have problems with your eating, but please just enjoy it. Please? For me, love?”

You just sighed “Ok, I will”

Shuri smiled “Good, now I already ordered ahead”

You looked at her confused “huh”

“What did you order…”

“You’ll just have to see love,” she said as she winked at you

Now you were intrigued. Shuri was not the person you once knew and it was scary. The “baby lesbian who doesn’t know shit” is gone. You didn’t know how to feel. A part of you loved it, and a part of you was sad that those simpler times were over.

“Ooo, your song is on!” she said, swaying to the music in her chair.

Oh shit. It was Rain by SWV. You laughed. You forgot that she loved this song as much as you do.

She stood up and offered her hand.

“Would you like to dance?”

You were a little hesitant but then obliged.

She pulled you into her and started dancing. With her soothing hands on your waist and her warm scent, you let loose. And started doing something that you thought would never happen again: dance.

“Look at youuu, dancin’, and shit”

You rolled your eyes and started singing some of the lyrics.

“Raiiiinnn downnnn on meee, let your lovee just fall on meeeee”

At this point, both of you guys were singing and dancing. Everyone was looking at you. There was a karaoke place, but y'all didn’t use it.

The song was at a close end.

“Sometimes it's soft as a mistyy raiiinnnnnn” both you and Shuri sing.

You both busted out laughing, walking to go back to your seats. Sitting down, you couldn’t contain the new excitement you just found. When you looked down at the table you saw gumbo, jambalaya, curry chicken, coco bread, and much more.

“Holy shit,” You said.

“Shuri…how tf am I gonna eat all of this food?”

“You won't, I invited some extra people last minute. I underestimated the quantity of the food so I called some people. They should be here any minute now.”

“Oh”

You were a little disappointed that it wasn’t going to be just you and her. Wait no you didn’t, you just got your life together. You can’t ruin that.

Shuri peeped at the disappointment on your face.

“I thought you didn’t want to be with me alone”

So did I you thought.

“I-I’m not disappointed”

“Ndicela ungandixokisi sthandwa”- do not lie to me, my love

Her kimoyo beads translated for you.

“I am not lying, I promise”

She chuckled at your failed attempt at trying to act tough. It was trash, but funny. Instead of grilling you about it, she just changed the subject.

“So, I need to talk to you about a few things”

“I figured that”

Shuri put down her drink. “What you said about my mother was unacceptable. You will respect her. Understand?”

Your lower regions were getting wetter by second. You didn’t know where all of this dominance came from but your vagina was wetter than NIagra Falls.

“Yes. I realize that now, even though I am right, I could've said it better. I don’t even like to say that word, I was just angry”

“I understand. And I apologize for ‘poking the bear’ as you Americans say. I shouldn’t have done that”

You put down your drink trying not to smile. You loved this new her. She grew so much over the years.

“Also,I thought you would know more about Xhosa by now” Shuri said, changing the subject again.

“I stopped learning after I got my first promotion, I just didn’t have any time”

“Shame, because you’ll need to learn it”

You looked at her blankly.

“..why?”

She puts down her drink.

“Because your first task is to help me in Wakanda”

#letitia wright #shuri x reader #shuri udaku #lgbtq

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battyaboutbooksreviews · 2 months

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🌈 Queer Books Coming Out in March 2024 🌈

🌈 Good afternoon, my bookish bats! Struggling to keep up with all the amazing queer books coming out this month? Here are a FEW of the stunning, diverse queer books you can add to your TBR before the year is over. Remember to #readqueerallyear! Happy reading!

[ Release dates may have changed. ]

❤️ Shift: A Memoir of Identity and Other Illusions - Penny Guisinger 🧡 Tempting Olivia - Clare Ashton 💛 Monilinia - Free Mints 💚 Guillaume - Aurora Dimitre 💙 The Marble Queen - Anna Kopp & Gabrielle Kari 💜 The Baker & the Bard - Fern Haught ❤️ Rainbow! - Sunny & Gloom 🧡 The Safe Zone - Amy Marsden 💛 The Weavers of Alamaxa - Hadeer Elsbai 💙 The No-Girlfriend Rule - Christen Randall 💜 A Different Kind of Brave by Lee Wind 🌈 Cirque du Slay - Rob Osler ❤️ Wizard’s Debt - Niranjan 🧡 One Last Breath - Ginny Myers Sain 💛 Nothing Special - Katie Cook 💚 I Feel Awful, Thanks - Lara Pickle 💙 The Tower - Flora Carr 💜 Be the Sea - Clara Ward ❤️ What Grows in the Dark - Jaq Evans 🧡 Heirs of Bone and Sea - Kay Adams 💛 The Haunting of Velkwood - Gwendolyn Kiste 💙 Thunder Song - Sasha taqwšəblu LaPointe 💜 Mona of the Manor - Armistead Maupin 🌈 Like Happiness - Ursula Villarreal-Moura

❤️ Ellipses - Vanessa Lawrence 🧡 Saint, Sorrow, Sinner - Freydís Moon 💛 Blood & Brujas - Mikayla D. Hornedo 💚 Infinity Kings - Adam Silvera 💙 Really Cute People - Markus Harwood-Jones 💜 How You Were Born - Kate Cayley ❤️ These Bodies Between Us - Sarah Van Name 🧡 Icarus - K. Ancrum 💛 The Emperor and the Endless Palace - Justinian Huang 💙 How Not to Date an Angel - Lana Kole 💜 Enemy Colours - R.M. Olson 🌈 Broken Parts Included - Alyson Root

❤️ Who's Afraid of Gender? - Judith Butler 🧡 The Duke’s Cowboy - Andrew Grey 💛 The Secret Something - Emily Wright 💚 Colstead & Andie - Olivia Janae 💙 Play It Again, Ma’am - Sienna Waters 💜 Love Is…? - K.J. Wrights ❤️ Welcome to Forever - Nathan Tavares 🧡 Just Another Epic Love Poem - Parisa Akhbari 💛 The Phoenix Bride - Natasha Siegel 💙 These Letters End in Tears - Musih Tedji Xaviere 💜 Truly Home - J.J. Hale 🌈 Monster Mixer - Robin Jo Margaret

❤️ The House of Hidden Meanings - RuPaul 🧡 Promised to the Queen - Barbara Winkes 💛 A Conclave of Crimson - Nicole Eigener & Beverley Lee 💚 A Hunt of Blood and Iron - Cara Nox 💙 The Fealty of Monsters - Ladz 💜 Ariel Crashes a Train - Olivia A. Cole ❤️ Those Beyond the Wall - Micaiah Johnson 🧡 Dancing Toward Stardust - Julia Underwood 💛 Heir to Dreams & Darkness - Ben Alderson 💙 Comet Cruise - Niska Morrow 💜 Dead Girls Walking - Sami Ellis 🌈 Blackout - Carlos E. Rivera

❤️ Monster Crush - Erin Ellie Franey 🧡 Blessed Water - Margot Douaihy 💛 These Fragile Graces, This Fugitive Heart - Izzy Wasserstein 💚 Kiss of Seduction - Rawnie Sabor 💙 Sunbringer - Hannah Kaner 💜 Evacuation to Love - C.A. Popovich ❤️ Sin - Brooke Matthews 🧡 Falls from Grace - Ruby Landers 💛 Lean in to Love - Catherine Lane 💙 A Small Apocalypse - Laura Chow Reeve 💜 Cascade Failure - L.M. Sagas 🌈 The Mars House - Natasha Pulley

❤️ All This Time - Sage Donnell 🧡 The Romance Lovers Book Club - MA Binfield 💛 View from the Top - Morgan Adams 💚 Number Call - Nagisa Furuya 💙 Crossing Bridges - Chelsey Lynford 💜 The Boyfriend Subscription - Steven Salvatore ❤️ Love the World or Get Killed Trying - Alvina Chamberland 🧡 Synthetic Sea - Franklyn S. Newton 💛 The Prince & His Stolen Groom - J.E. Ridge 💙 Chrysalis and Requiem - Quinton Li 💜 Where Sleeping Girls Lie - Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé 🌈 A Botanical Daughter - Noah Medlock

❤️ Wednesday Nights - by Donna Jay 🧡 The Woods All Black - Lee Mandelo 💛 Song of the Huntress - Lucy Holland 💚 Rainbow Black - Maggie Thrash 💙 Spirits & Sunflowers - A.D. Armistead & Austin Daniel 💜 Floating Hotel - Grace Curtis ❤️ Far From Camelot - Rylee Hale 🧡 This Way to Change - Jezz Chung 💛 Mexican Bird - Luis Lopez-Maldonado 💙 Android Affection: Unveiling - Beau Van Dalen 💜 Welcome to the Damned - Astraea Long 🌈 She Came for Blood - Darva Green

❤️ Cover Story - Rachel Lacey 🧡 The Poisons We Drink - Bethany Baptiste 💛 The Perfect Guy Doesn't Exist - Sophie Gonzales 💚 In Walked Trouble - Dana Hawkins 💙 Never Leave, Never Lie - Thea Verdone 💜 Guardian: Zhen Hun - Priest ❤️ All the World Beside - Garrard Conley 🧡 Rainbows, Unicorns, and Triangles - Jessica Kingsley Publishers 💛 The Feast Makers - H.A. Clarke 💙 Synthetic Sea - Franklyn S. Newton 💜 All the Painted Stars - Emma Denny 🌈 A Hard Sell - Jennifer Moffatt

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fleur-de-violette · 2 months

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“I’m Batman,” and all the lies one tells themself

AO3

Summary:

Dick doesn’t take long to realize he’s in some kind of dream or hallucination. The issue is getting out of it. Prompt: “I could be worse; I could be you.”

Note:

I hope you enjoy the fic! Warning for hallucinations/dream and general angst.

“Robin?”

Dick turns, tries to get his comm to work, tries to locate Damian without success. He’s in a corridor, with no memories of how he got there. He walks, but the place is never-ending. It turns, and closes on him, and moves around.

Lucid dream then. That, or he’s drugged.

“Robin?” he tries again. Only an unnatural echo replies to him.

“Robin,” says a voice behind him. “My little Robin, my spring bird, please look at me, please come to me.”

He’s not going to turn around. He knows what he will see if he does. He keeps walking. He knows all too well what the corpse of his mother looks like.

The cape becomes heavier and heavier as he walks. It’s suffocating. He tries to remove it, but the more he claws at it, the tighter it gets. Until there is no fabric behind his hands, and he’s fighting with gloved hands trying to strangle him. He looks up to see…

“Jason.”

“Surprised?”

“Not really. It’s not a secret you hate me.”

“I don’t hate you,” Jason says with a voice he associates with Jason. Not Red Hood. “I could never hate you, man! You’re so cool. When you were Robin, I always admired you! And now… look at me. Sure, B gave me the training, and the gadgets, but the idea, the magic! It’s all you. You made me who I am!”

“You made me who I am,” Red Hood repeats, with the voice of Red Hood, and his face deforms to take the shape of the mask, an inhuman form, shaped only by hate. “It’s your fault, it’s all your fault.”

He tries to fight, tries to get the hand to let him go until they finally do, and he falls backward.

Except there is no floor to meet him. Only the infinity of nothingness.

And he falls.

(Somewhere, there is a gunshot. Rain.)

He falls.

And falls.

Until a hand catches him. He looks up to a familiar cowl.

“B?”

“You disappointed me,” Bruce says. “All you do is disappoint me over and over again. There is not a day where I don’t regret picking up that day. Damn that pity that made me keep you around so long.”

Dick is still dangling in the air. But he can’t stay there. He has to fight. He will fight. He will come back to reality. He won’t lose now. He swore it on Bruce’s grave. He would protect Gotham. He would protect Robin. He would protect Damian.

“No, you’re not… you’re not him. Bruce is…” he said it to Tim, he can say it again. “Bruce is dead. And you’re not him. You’re just a result of whatever is happening to me. The worst knockoff imitation of Batman I’ve ever seen.”

“The worst?” Batman asks, and then he laughs, something unnatural with his face. “Oh, no. I’m not the worst.”

He pulls up Dick to whispers in his ear, “I could be worse. I could be you.”

#dc #batfam #fanfiction #my writing #dick grayson #batman #dick grayson needs a hug #angst #horror

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devilscastle69 · 10 months

Text

hollister

lmao here is my attempt at a j/jk fic

post-canon au

about 1k words,

characters: goj/o, me//gumi, yu/ji, no/bara

set in future au they're all 21+

The last thing Gojo had expected when passing by a department store with youthful beach attire was to have his mind zip back to another time. That Hawaiian shirt on display is the same one he’d seen on Geto over a decade ago in the “before times,” back when they’d spent the weekend at the beach. It’d been unbuttoned, revealing the abs from all of his training, his smile burned into Gojo’s memory. His lips had tasted like seawater, and the shirt had stayed on as they'd explored each other for the first and last time, the first and last time he’d truly felt human. A bittersweet taste forms in his mouth as he tries to walk past the store.

Could it be that the old style is coming back? Maybe he’d been ahead of his time in fashion.

Gojo’s reflection stares back at him as he decides to head in. A lot of these clothes are his style, and he’s wondering how he’s never been in this store before.

Immediately, his question is answered as he walks in. The store is dimly lit and music blasts like he’s in some sort of nightclub, but even that doesn’t bother him. No, it’s the strong scent—scratch that—many strong scents that flood his nostrils that’s absolutely unbearable.

“Hh’gxtch!” he stifles a sneeze into his wrist. It’s going to be the first of many, but it’d be ideal if he could buy the shirt before the rest of the impending fit takes over. “hmPHT’chh! Ihh’gxxt!” Wishful thinking.

He fixes his sunglasses that’ve traveled nearly an inch down his nose from the jerking motions. Okay, he’s found the display. The rest of the shirts have to be nearby somewhere. He sniffles and scrubs at his nose before putting his infinity up.

“GXTtt’chh!” That had actually hurt. Even now that he’s put up his infinity barrier, it’s too late. The damage is done. “ehh’Gxxtchh’iew!”

Damn, there don’t seem to be any of these shirts left. His shoulders sag, but then he realizes that the one on the mannequin seems to be the right size. He’s already causing a scene, he might as well take it.

12,000 yen? For a Hawaiin shirt? It’s not like money is a concern to Gojo, but damn, what a rip off. Geto would be laughing his ass off right now at him. He smiles at the joke and heads over to the register, barrier down for now for ease of payment. It’s all fun and games until he realizes that the deeper into the store he goes, the more obnoxious the smell becomes. Do they just dump bottles of their cologne all over the floor?

“Ngt’chh! hptt’CH!” A woman presumably here with her teenage daughter gives him a nod. Now he feels really old.

He manages to stifle the next three into near-silence, but apparently not silent enough since the man in front of him in line turns to give him a wary look.

“It’s rude to stare,” Gojo points out nasally before sniffling noisily and sighing dramatically afterwards.

The man scoffs and turns away.

Gojo sneezes again into his elbow, but allows it to be louder this time out of spite.

When it’s Gojo’s turn to pay, the cashier looks relieved when he says he’s paying with card. (How is this not a more common occurrence in this store? How is he the only one sneezing his fucking head off?). He manages to only sneeze another three times during the interaction, and the teenager leaves the receipt on the counter to avoid touching his hand.

Gojo makes it to the nearby bench before he gives into his allergic fit, uncaring of any passerbyers, just absolutely desperate to get some sort of relief, even if he’s basically in the middle of the mall. He puts the bag down between his shoes and buries his nose into the collar of his shirt since he lacks any tissues.

“hehh-hhIHhgSCHh’iew! hhRSHHH’hiiu! Hahh…hhh…” He sniffles. Spray has coated his collar bone and he’s nowhere near done. “ihhSHHHiew! Hhh’...hhhDjttshhh! Ishhiew! Ihhpshhu!-schh!-TSHHh! Kssh!”

He can barely get a breath between sneezes and it leaves him panting and coughing dryly before it starts back up.

“hh’SHhhh! KSshh!-Tchh!-TSchh! hh’IHHSHh’ihh…huhhhh….”

How far was the nearest bathroom? Can he just get up and—

“Gojo-sensei?” Never mind.

“hh’KSHHh’hieww!”

“Bless you, Gojo-sensei, um, are you alright?”

“Gross.”

“What did you do now?”

Gojo looks up at the trio of his former students who had happened to run into him an hour before their meeting time at the fountain. “F-Finde,” he says, holding up a finger, “IhhxSHHhu! hh’KZtt’schhhiu! Guhh…”

“Are you catching a cold?” Yuji asks, concern obvious in his voice.

“Allergy attack,” Megumi answers for him. Gojo points at him in confirmation before sneezing again.

“Gross,” Nobara repeats with a disgusted sigh. She fishes out something from her bag and throws a pack of tissues on his lap. “Here, stop ruining your shirt.”

If it wouldn’t cause an absolute flood of disgusting mess, Gojo would snicker at her, but instead he quickly accepts the offering and folds a few tissues over his nose. He could moan with relief, but refrains from doing so as he blows his nose.

Yuji pats his shoulder encouragingly as if Gojo isn’t his former teacher and the strongest human being in existence. “Maybe we should get some fresh air.”

“Didn’t want to be here anyway,” Megumi mutters.

“Oh? Fushiguro! That’s not true, you looked so excited to get the—” Yuji gasps in pain as Megumi elbows him in the ribs.

“I already spent the card anyway,” Nobara agrees. Gojo’s not surprised she’d already spent the prepaid gift card.

“I already texted Ijichi,” Megumi mutters.

“hh’KXXtsh’chhu!”

“Let’s sit outside for a bit,” Yuji says, tugging on Gojo’s free hand. He drops his barrier to allow the contact and is shocked when his former students attempt to support his weight. Unnecessary, but he surprisingly allows it.

Satoru, you’ve been using your technique nonstop since yesterday, haven’t you?

What an odd memory to surface. What an odd time for his eyes to start watering again.

#snz fic #my writing #my fic #snz #allergy snz

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stark---contrast · 10 months

Text

Take a Chance on Me

After wielding the Infinity Stones, time seemed to move differently for Tony.

Maybe it was because of the snap that nearly killed him. Maybe it was a residue of time warping to different decades. Maybe it was elation due to the fact that they'd actually succeeded.

Or maybe Tony was just getting old.

The world was safe again and he could finally rest. And so time ticked away, seasons came and went, and before Tony knew it, Morgan was already seven and three years had passed in what felt only like months.

During that time, Pepper had moved back to the city: first merely for weekdays and then one day permanently. At least the divorce was a smooth, relatively painless process—not that Tony had expected anything else where Pepper was concerned.

Tony had debated on leaving the lakehouse but found he couldn't. Morgan deserved to keep her childhood home during the weeks that she was his, and Tony liked being near the rebuilt Avengers compound. The occasional winged figure soaring in the skies or the muted explosions of a new superhero generation being trained were tangible proof that he'd actually made a difference.

It was a somewhat solitary life. Even with Morgan, the bots and the damn alpaca scurrying about, Tony's social circle had been drastically reduced in the last decade. Conferences and extravagant parties had given way for a workshop in the garage and falling asleep to cartoons at 8 PM. Tony didn't even have to wear a disguise in public anymore: he'd simply fallen out of the general population's perception.

It was a blessing and a curse. On one hand, Morgan wouldn't have to grow up in Tony's shadow like he had in Howard's. In fact, most of Morgan's classmates were much more awestruck over Pepper, the renowned CEO of Stark Industries, than Morgan's dad with the weird arm who picked her up from soccer practice and sometimes built robots.

On the other hand, Tony was alone a lot of the time. And after years of first living with the Avengers and then with his wife and child, he didn't do so well with loneliness anymore.

Sometimes when it got particularly bad, he'd put on the armor's helmet and play a 360 degree recording of the latest Avengers meeting at the Compound and, yes, he knew full well how sad that was. Tony had retired of his own free will and had a new family now, a daughter who required his full attention and who he loved more than anything else in the world.

But if Tony's eyes still started misting inside the helmet whenever he saw Natasha's empty chair in the meetings, that was nobody's business but his own.

Still, it wasn't like the house was empty even on the weeks Morgan was with Pepper. Rhodey visited almost every weekend, marathoning LotR with Morgan or having beers with Tony on the porch, reminiscing about the good old days like the two old geezers that they were. Happy didn't come by as often now that he no longer had to drive Tony places, but when he did, he usually brought very welcome cheeseburgers and wholly unwelcome dating advice with him.

"You know, Pepper works fifty hours a week and still has time to date," Happy said.

"Well, anyone would fall for Pepper," Tony said around a bite of beef patty and cheddar cheese. "She just has to show up on a date and say one sentence and bam, boyfriend acquired. Not very time-consuming."

"At least she's putting herself out there," Happy insisted. "But if you want to keep being a hermit, there are a bunch of apps—"

"Yeah, because surely I'd be a hit on those," Tony huffed. "Not so much genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist these days; more like single dad, amputee in chronic pain, lost half of my assets in the divorce and spent the remainder rebuilding the Compound. What a catch!"

"The right person won't care about any of that," Happy said. "You just have to take the plunge. Don't you wish you had someone to share your life with?"

"I have Morgan," Tony simply replied, though that wasn't the entire truth.

Because there was also Steve.

Steve was the reason Tony had only lost an arm instead of his life, leaping across what felt like half of the battlefield and flinging himself at Tony to share the burden of the stones. Realistically, probably most of the burden; they knew from the Guardians that even just one stone could give five enhanced individuals a nasty zap when using its power. And nanotech armor or not, Tony was only a baseline human.

After Thanos' army faded away, Steve was the last thing Tony saw before he passed out and the first thing he saw when he woke up. Tony had stared at Steve's dumbstruck face hovering near the hospital bed, rasped "Please tell me nobody kissed me," and Steve had laughed. Just like back in New York.

Except this time, Steve didn't go on a fuck-you-all roadtrip after and leave Tony to deal with the collateral (and emotional) damage. Instead, he'd decided he was personally responsible for the upkeep of Tony and Pepper's lakehouse, and also picking up Morgan from kindergarten when Pepper was busy and going grocery shopping as long as Tony couldn't drive and feeding Gerald the moody alpaca that had already kicked him in the shin—twice. Steve would show up every few days and Tony would pretend to be annoyed even as Morgan squealed and ran out into the driveway to greet him. Clearly, Steve was bored after passing on the shield to Sam, and helping Tony "Designated Charity Case" Stark was either his way of feeling useful or apologizing to Pepper for crippling her husband.

Probably both.

To his credit, Tony did try to fight Steve on it the first few months, but he really should have learned by then that there was no out-stubborning Steve Rogers when it came to doing the right thing. Tony had fully expected Steve's wellness checks to stop as soon as he received his prosthetic arm and finished his physical therapy, but that was almost two years ago and Tony still had leftovers in the fridge from when Steve cooked dinner for him and Morgan last weekend.

If anything, Steve's visits had only become more frequent over the years, which had made some sense after the divorce, but not so much now that Tony had almost full mobility of his arm back. Still, Steve was a big help and Morgan obviously loved him, so Tony had grown kind of fond of their weird little routine and wasn't about to ruin it by demanding Steve's motivations.

Of course, other people weren't as willing to ignore the subject.

"So… you and Steve," Bruce said when he was visiting for his semi-regular science talks with Tony—which more often than not ended in tea and Avengers gossip and raiding Morgan's cookie stash. The Hulk's personality might lie dormant, but his appetite did not.

"There is no me and Steve," Tony huffed. "There's just Steve and Steve's guilt complex. He likes collecting sad people missing an arm; it's kind of his thing, if you hadn't noticed."

"Uh-huh," Bruce said.

"I'm telling you, that guy sees someone with a prosthetic and immediately whips out the adoption papers," Tony kept going. "But hey, if he wants to waste his life mowing my lawn and washing my dishes, I'm not about to complain. Having your personal supersoldier is a lot cheaper than paying for a gardener or cleaning service—and much more efficient when it comes to chopping firewood, too."

"Right," Bruce said. "So who are the flowers from, Tony?"

Tony kept his face carefully neutral and resisted the urge to glance at the bouquet he knew was sitting in a vase on the coffee table. Steve had brought the flowers a week ago and they were starting to wilt, but Tony kept "forgetting" to throw them away.

"Morgan likes flowers," Tony said in explanation.

"I doubt Steve would bring your kid flowers that mean 'Please give me a chance'," Bruce said, because of course he happened to be fluent in flower language. "Have you ever considered he might be sticking around for some other reason than guilt?"

"Jesus, Bruce, let the man bring some platonic flowers!" Tony exclaimed. "You know you're perpetuating toxic masculinity, right? I'll file a complaint to Avengers HR and sic Carol on you."

Bruce rolled his eyes so hard Tony thought he saw a flash of green in them. At least the Hulk would have laughed at the absurd notion of Steve trying to court Tony.

"Anyway, as I was saying about the particle collider…" Tony started, then went quiet as he heard the familiar sound of a motorcycle pulling up in the driveway.

"Oh look, Steve's home," Bruce deadpanned.

"Ha ha, very funny," Tony said. He checked the calendar on the fridge only to confirm what he already knew; it was indeed Tuesday, and Steve wasn't supposed to come by until Friday to help Tony unload the hay bales he'd ordered for his ungrateful alpaca. "He probably just broke his phone or something and wants me to fix it. Sit tight, I'll be right back."

Tony didn't wait for Bruce's reply before walking out on the porch. Steve was already getting off his bike, but rather than the dirt-stained jeans or a sinfully tight t-shirt Tony was used to seeing him in while he did his handiwork around the property, Steve was dressed in a leather jacket and had even styled his hair.

Oh, and on top of looking unfairly good he was also carrying a bouquet of red tulips.

"Tony!" Steve's face lit up and he practically jogged up to meet Tony. "How was your day?"

Tony blinked. "It's Tuesday."

"Yeah, uh…" Steve's smile turned sheepish. "I just thought I'd swing by to see if you wanted to grab dinner together? Oh, and I drove past a florist on the way—here, these are…I mean, you can have them. If you want."

Steve shoved the flowers at Tony and he grabbed them more out of reflex than anything else.

"...Thanks?" Tony said, regarding Steve skeptically. "I'll have to say no on the dinner, though."

"Oh," Steve said, his face falling like Tony had kicked a puppy instead of declining to eat with him.

"I have a week's worth of leftovers to get through because you made enough to feed a small army. Remember?"

Steve frowned. "You didn't throw them away?"

"Well, somebody who grew up during the great depression has taught me not to waste food." Tony smirked. "But hey, you guys have a good time."

"...What?"

"Oh come on, you're clearly dressed up," Tony said, gesturing to all of Steve. "It's obviously some kind of group outing that you wanted to invite the resident hermit to. No need to keep up the act."

Steve was quiet for a beat—probably embarrassed Tony had seen through his white lies—before he seemed to deflate.

"Yeah," Steve said. "Sorry. It was a dumb idea. Have a good night, Ton—Bruce!?"

Tony heard the doorframe creak as Bruce squeezed himself through it.

"Hiya, Steve!" Bruce chirped way too cheerfully. "Funny seeing you here."

Tony glared at Bruce. Bruce resolutely ignored it.

"Yeah, you too," Steve said and, geez, he even pulled out the fake Captain America smile. "Sorry for intruding, I didn't see your car. Weren't you two supposed to be meeting next week?"

"Oh, yeah, Tony just rescheduled a few days ago," Bruce said, the traitor. Thankfully, he didn't know that the reason for Tony's urgent change of plans was because the five days without both Morgan and Steve would have been miserable otherwise.

"And it's no biggie, I was just leaving anyway—Jen's picking me up from the main road," Bruce had the audacity to lie, because Tony was supposed to drop him off later in the evening. "There's a few cups of coffee left in the machine if you want it."

"Actually, I was just…" Steve nodded awkwardly at his bike.

"Yes, see, he's leaving," Tony said. "You both were, but somehow you're still right here—"

"Oh, speaking of Jen," Bruce interrupted, "she keeps bugging me for your number," Bruce told Steve, then grimaced. "In…not so child-friendly terms."

Tony bit the inside of his cheek to keep himself from commenting on that delightful bit of information. He'd only met Jennifer once, but she was an absolutely stunning woman, not to mention could match even Steve's strength. If Steve took her up on that offer, they'd make one hell of a couple. She'd be lucky—Steve would be lucky to be with her, of course.

"Sorry." Steve gave a little half-smile. "Not interested in some one-time thing."

"Yeah, I thought so," Bruce said, then looked at the bouquet Tony was now clutching a little too forcefully. "Nice flowers, by the way. Red for undying love, right?"

"Oh, here we go again," Tony groaned.

"Uh," Steve said, his face steadily approaching the color of the flowers. "I just thought they…looked nice."

"I'm sure," Bruce said. "I assume they were out of flowers that said 'Tony, you idiot, there is no group outing, I was asking you out on a date'?"

"Oh my god, Bruce, get in the damn car and I'll drive you—wait, what?" Tony said, the words only now registering.

"Have fun!" Bruce said and—Tony could only describe it as fled—the scene.

And so Tony stood there on his porch like an idiot, with the offending tulips in his hand and a dolled-up, fidgeting and completely silent Steve in front of him.

"That's the last time I let Bruce into the cookie stash," Tony finally said.

That seemed to snap Steve out of his stupor. "Yeah, I…didn't expect that. At least not from Bruce."

"Sorry about him," Tony said. He held out the bouquet. "You should probably take these back, huh? With the 'undying love' and whatnot."

Tony tried for a grin. If he just didn't think about Bruce's words, he might survive this conversation with his dignity intact. Steve would laugh and sheepishly take the flowers and leave, and Tony could back inside and casually scream into a pillow. As you do.

But because Tony's life was never easy, Steve didn't accept the flowers. He just stared at them, then at Tony, then flushed all the way up to his ears and cleared his throat.

"No," Steve said, stubbornly keeping eye contact even though he was clearly dying inside. "No, I don't think I will."

"O-kaaay," Tony drawled, slowly withdrawing the bouquet. What the hell was up with Steve today?

"Unless…unless you're actually rejecting me," Steve soldiered on through his visible discomfort. "And I've been too dense to notice it all this time."

Tony opened his mouth to ask if Steve was having a stroke and promptly closed it. There was clearly something going on here that went deeper than Tony saying no to getting pizza or whatever with Steve, but like so many times before, they were just talking past each other.

"Steve," Tony said levelly. "Why are you really here?"

Steve stood up a little straighter even though he was still ugly blushing.

"Because I thought you were free and wanted to take you out to dinner," Steve said.

Tony squinted at him. "And you…dressed up and brought flowers—"

"Clearly should've picked the 'I'm asking you out on a date, you goddamn idiot' flowers instead," Steve huffed.

Tony blinked. He stared. He tried to process the earth-shattering discovery that Steve actually wanted to court him.

It didn't make sense. Tony had questions. He also still wanted to scream into that pillow. There was so much to talk about.

Of course, what came out of Tony's mouth was, "Language, Cap."

Steve's face did something funny at that: like his body couldn't decide whether to laugh or cringe. Smooth, Tony.

Eventually, Steve did burst out laughing, though it had a hysteric edge to it. Tony could relate wholeheartedly.

Tony cleared his throat and Steve stopped laughing. "What I meant was: hi, my name is Tony Stark, single dad missing an arm and owning the world's rudest alpaca," Tony rambled. "And you're Steve Rogers, literal human perfection, standing on my porch and expecting me to believe that you being here is anything more than pity."

"What?" Steve said. "C'mon, Tony, you can't really believe that. It's been over three years." Tony shrugged, and Steve's eyes went wide. "You mean…all this time you thought—"

"Yes? No? In my defense, I tried not to think about it at all, because I liked having you around and the idea of being your good deed of the day kinda put a damper on that."

"How…" Steve said, then shook his head. "Doesn't matter. You're wrong. I started helping you because you're my friend, and then I stuck around because…well, I liked being here."

"And now you want to go on a date. With me. Romantically," Tony clarified.

Steve nodded. "Yes."

"Why?" Tony asked.

"Why do people usually go on dates?" Steve shrugged. "I wanna be with you, and I really think we could be good together."

"But you're…this," Tony, again, gestured to all of Steve. "And I'm…" He glanced down at his workshop tee and grease-stained sweatpants; a far cry from the suits and booty jeans he'd worn in his prime. "Well, I definitely put the 'dad' in 'dad bod'."

Steve just kept looking at him. "And?"

"And you don't want someone like me!" Tony exclaimed. "I'm irresponsible and frankly terrible at relationships, always have been, and I miss being Iron Man and don't know what to do with myself the weeks Morgan's at Pep's." Steve didn't seem phased, so Tony took a shallow breath and quickly continued, "Sometimes I spy on Avengers meetings and cry, and my shoulder still hurts from the stones and the burn scars look hideous and I have nightmares from the wormhole and—and, oh, okay, we're kissing now—"

Steve, apparently done with Tony's pity party, took the liberty of cupping Tony's cheek and leaning in to kiss him. Which, all things considered, was probably the most effective way he'd ever managed to shut Tony up.

Tony's brain was too fried for him to do much more than stand there and let himself be kissed. To be fair, this was the most action he'd gotten in almost three years and he'd never realized how much he'd missed it. The kiss was little more than a soft press of their lips but the simple intimacy of it was enough to flood Tony's body with happy chemicals.

Eventually, he did manage to kiss back, but Steve still pulled away much too soon.

"Are you done?" Steve asked, and it really was quite persuasive when murmured against Tony's lips.

"...With the self-loathing or the kissing?" Tony asked. "Because I was kinda just getting started with the latter."

Steve chuckled and pressed their lips together again and, okay, wow, it really was that easy.

They were both much more confident this time. Steve kissed with meaning, Tony pulled him closer by his stupidly sexy leather jacket, Steve rubbed his thumb over Tony's five o' clock shadow and Tony tilted his head to make the slide of their lips easier. He might not have kissed anyone in years, but he could totally do this—it was like riding a bike, right? He just had to play it cool.

And then Steve lapped at the seam of his lips, and, really, how was Tony supposed to not clutch his jacket and let out a pathetic moan?

That was apparently the cue for Steve to break the kiss, but luckily he didn't look weirded out by Tony's desperation; in fact, he was blushing again and even panting a little, which was a pretty nice ego boost considering how much it took for Steve to get winded.

"Sorry, I, uh." Steve cleared his throat and took a step back and Tony bravely resisted his body's urge to scream no, no, no, come back! "I got a little too into that," Steve said.

Tony raised an eyebrow. "Did it look like I was complaining?"

"Well, I still have some things I need to make clear," Steve said.

Oh, boy. Tony straightened his back and steeled himself for the good ol' "Tony, you're so great—except for those five hundred flaws of yours that mean we'll never work out" spiel.

Steve took a deep breath and started, "You're the bravest, most heroic man I've ever met and I'm sorry it took me over ten years to realize that."

Tony blinked. That was a weird start to friendzone someone.

"You have a brilliant mind but more than that, you have a big heart," Steve said. "You care so much about everyone around you, even if they hurt you—"

Steve winced and Tony felt the phantom sensation of Siberian snow on his face and something heavy pressing down on the suit's arc reactor.

"When I came here three years ago, I expected you to scream in my face, and I wouldn't have blamed you," Steve said. "Instead, you helped me. You trusted me. You forgave me. And then you saved the world—again." Steve smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners; Tony had never noticed the wrinkles before. "And after, you let me be a part of your new life. You let me be a part of Morgan's. And, god, Tony the way you are with her… How could I not fall in love with you?"

Okay, well, that was just unfair. Tony had been just about ready to accept that Steve wasn't about to dump him before they'd even gotten started, but now he had to process the fact that Steve apparently loved him too. Despite all of the bright red, painfully obvious warning signs.

Maybe Happy was right. Maybe the right person wouldn't care.

"I can't even describe how much the last three years have meant to me. How much you mean to me," Steve said, his pretty blue eyes staring deep into Tony's. "And if you'll have me, I promise I'll do my damndest to make you happy."

Tony still wasn't quite sure if this was real. Maybe he was dreaming or Bruce's tea had a little extra something.

But hallucination or not, there was no reality where he'd ever be able to resist Steve Rogers spilling his heart and asking to date Tony.

"Okay," Tony said.

Steve blinked, then gave him a hesitant smile. "Really?"

"Well, my kid already loves you, and that's like 90% of my dating criteria these days," Tony said. "I also might have been planning on exploding the workshop roof on purpose so I could get you to come back before Friday, because not having you around freaks me out and five days is way too long."

Steve's smile widened and he stepped closer again. "I know the feeling. I barely managed two before I needed to see you."

Tony's heart did funny things at that and since Steve was already right there, Tony figured he might as well steal another kiss.

Steve made a happy little sigh when their lips met and Tony felt like an absolute idiot for not pulling on this thread sooner. There had just been too much at stake, with their rocky history and Tony's injuries and the divorce and Morgan—

Shit. What if Steve didn't understand how important Morgan was in all this?

"Full disclosure," Tony said, pulling away. "Morgan still has complete veto rights. She says no, this ends right away."

Rather than nod grimly like Tony expected, Steve smiled sheepishly. "Well, actually…I don't think Morgan's opinion will be a problem."

Tony stared. "Please say you didn't tell my kid you wanna bang me."

Steve took a moment to look at Tony like he was an idiot. "Your child," Steve started, "was the one who came up to me two weeks ago and said 'Daddy still doesn't know you love him. You should bring him flowers'."

Some kind of noise escaped Tony's throat; a quiet wheeze in the spirit of Holy shit my seven-year-old daughter tried to set me up with Captain America.

Steve chuckled. "Yeah, that was my reaction too."

"Why…what…how?" Tony managed.

"I've heard from multiple sources that I'm not as subtle with my feelings as I think I am," Steve said, then got a mischievous glint in his eye and added, "and Morgan's always been smarter than her old man, anyway."

Tony barked out a surprised laugh at the unexpected sass.

"Oh, really?" Tony said around a grin. "That's how it's gonna be with you, huh?"

Steve smirked. "Maybe."

"I can already tell you're going to be a menace," Tony teased. "You're lucky you're cute."

"I thought I was 'human perfection'."

Tony snorted a surprised—and extremely unattractive—laugh. Steve merely grinned, and, god, when was the last time anyone but Morgan had made Tony laugh like this?

"Well, mister Human Perfection," Tony said, brushing his hand against Steve's. "Still wanna have dinner with me? I've got cold coffee and leftover casserole."

Steve smiled and laced his fingers with Tony's. "Sounds like a plan."

That was when Steve pulled him close and kissed him again, and Tony decided he could definitely get used to this.

#stony #tony stark #steve rogers #starkfic #mcu #stevetony games 2023

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omegalomania · 2 years

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i would like to hear more on the patrick vs brendon vocal ability discussion if you would maybe want to rant 👀 👀 (hshsgehdv also I've recently come to know that mr urie is Not that great of a Person so appreciate you for making that post <3)

all right so full disclaimer: the last time i had any notable vocal training was like about 10 years ago. i did get some vocal training but i have undergone hrt since then so most of what i did know is pretty useless since ive never taken the time to actually relearn my range. my understanding of this stuff is old and limited so if anyone whos actually up to date on this shit can weigh in thats always great. im doing this because im a salty mccuntnugget whos had too much honey jack daniels for one night and that apparently is what supercharges me to write emo bandmember cringe compilation posts. somehow.

this got long so im throwing it beneath a cut. click for more if you wanna read about one guy on the internet having Opinions about which of these two dudes sings better

so once again: this is MYYYY OPINION im not your mom you are free to disagree or whatever i literally do not care. but an anon asked so im going to answer. here we go.

FIRST NOTE. comparisons between patrick and brendon have been going on since the dawn of the fucking age but brendon his own damn self decided to act like patrick was copying him vocally so that means i can be as mean as i want cause he started it. we’re doing playground logic here cause this is my blog and i do what i want and also cause hes that much of a cunt.

so i want to start things off with a reminder that patrick stump did not set out to be a singer! he was not picked out of a lineup for his vocal ability. he mostly just wanted to write songs, and it was joe and pete who made a point of saying "no actually you should sing." and it takes patrick a while to actually grow into his range and gain confidence as a singer since his real love is composition. it's not until infinity on high in 2007 that you really hear him growing into his own as a vocalist and it's not until the hiatus/posthiatus that you really hear his vocal confidence.

brendon got to be the singer for panic because bassist brent wilson knew him in high school and he thought his vocal ability was top notch. the rest of the band agreed. it also took brendon a while to grow into his voice. in fact in the early days before panic actually took off (aka before ryan ross badgered pete wentz into signing a band of mostly high schoolers), people on old fob forums legitimately thought that brendon WAS patrick. old articles refer to panic as fall out boy clones for probably that reason.

brendon actually made his vocal debut on a fall out boy record, from under the cork tree (which was released may 5 2005, whereas panic's debut a fever you can't sweat out wouldn't release until september 27 2005). he does a little part in 7 minutes in heaven (atavan halen) on the chorus (he does the second "i keep telling myself, i keep telling myself i'm not the desperate type") and it's genuinely something a lot of people miss, because he sounds a lot like patrick here. later in 2008, this would happen again on 20 dollar nosebleed, which gave brendon a much bigger vocal part (again he splits the chorus with patrick) but in which their vocal inflections are very very similar to the point where a lot of people don’t realize he contributed vocals there.

so there are a lot of similarities, particularly when these two guys were still growing into their voices. it was during fob's hiatus that these started to diverge, and by 2017 they would be wildly different.

patrick readily admitted a lot that he never really intended to be a singer and it wasn't until infinity on high (2007) that he made a genuine attempt to be a singer in earnest. this reticence would often show live. it wasn't until the hiatus and then posthiatus that patrick, and also the rest of the band, had a consistent live presence imo. fob had a lot of infamously sloppy shows - fun to watch, but sonically kind of all over the place - and patrick wouldn't always be the most consistent vocalist. he'd be strong one night and breathy the next, and it wasn't until the hiatus that he started taking vocal lessons.

but the improvement really really shows now. patrick is a much more consistent and powerful vocalist posthiatus, and he's reportedly incredibly diligent in taking care of his voice. that's why you often see him making these kinds of faces in backstage videos; he's doing vocal trills, which are a specific kind of warmup that helps limber up the voice preshow. they look and sound a little silly, but warmups are important to make sure you dont damage your voice. patrick has specific warmup routines and also goes on vocal rest and doesn't do a lot of talking prior to doing a show.

so brendon does double shots before every show. i’ll be honest here i tried to do more research into what goes into warmup routines before panic shows but i Cannot deal with hearing this man talk about himself more than i already have tonight so if anyone else wants to source whatever he does. please do. i would not be surprised if he treats his voice fucking atrociously but even if he doesn’t...his upper register (which is basically his one party trick in live settings) is starting to sound awful strained on studio vocals as of 2022, which is not a good look.

i also want to emphasize that even if his technical ability took time to really come into its own, patrick has always been an incredibly emotionally versatile vocalist. from under the cork tree is really the first time you get to see this shine, where patrick swings from cocky tongue-in-cheek irony (our lawyer made us change the name of this song so we wouldn't get sued) to aching vulnerability (i've got a dark alley and a bad idea that says you should shut your mouth) to snarling anger and accusation [get busy living or get busy dying (do you part to save the scene and stop going to shows)]. factor in the bonus tracks and you get patrick at his most ruthless (my heart is the worst kind of weapon), his most raw and desolate (star 67), and a rare appearance of some borderline unclean vocals (snitches and talkers get stitches and walkers).

posthiatus this is even more apparent. save rock and roll in 2013 demanded an incredible depth of emotional and technical range, and patrick was noticeably a little gun-shy about actually committing to doing those kinds of riffs live, since he wasn’t sure he was going to have to perform those songs live. by 2018′s mania, i want to emphasize that you can actually HEAR patrick smiling in "sunshine riptide." on mania, you also have songs that demand a diverse range of tone and vocal depth: “stay frosty royal milk tea” is a snarling, punchy opening track that reminds you that patrick was a drummer first, but this is also paired with the eclectic edm-soaked “young and menace,” the crooning doo-wop style ballad “heaven’s gate,” the reggae-flavored “HOLD ME TIGHT OR DON’T,” and the closing track which, full disclosure, is probably one of my favorite songs of all time, “bishops knife trick.” and patrick pulls them all off! the best display of this was that he was able to do young and menace live in both its original incarnation and in the somber, stripped-down piano version.

also, as a note: fall out boy songs are really fucking hard to sing. the vocal range they demand is absolutely insane even if you’re not some drummer who got strongarmed into being a singer. the fact that patrick can replicate these vocals live and maintain a rich emotional diversity in tone is really, really noteworthy.

panic songs are also pretty hard to sing. they require a lot of vocal acrobatics, which was an ambitious thing for a band composed of mostly high schoolers when they started out. early performances were really rough because not only was brendon struggling, the rest of the band was struggling to perform songs live that ryan ross wrote on his computer lol.

so now is the part where i start drinking heavily so i can talk about brendon vocals. brendon has the technical talent, even if, like patrick, it took him a while to grow into it. but his emotional versatility is, imo, sorely lacking, and that was evident in early days but it would only get more glaring as time went on. a fever you can’t sweat out in 2005 had a lot of really intensely emotional moments and emotionally charged songs, but it took me a few listens to really grok that because brendon sings them all with the same upbeat energy. and you can put that down on him being an inexperienced singer still figuring his way around this whole “being a frontman” gig, but the trend actively continues and in fact gets worse over time. i think 2008′s pretty. odd. gave us some insight into this due to the pronounced vocal role that ryan ross gets on that album. he takes lead vocals on “behind the sea” and gives us some audible backing vocals throughout in a way that suggests to me that, on some level, the band was aware that they needed someone with more emotional range to counter brendon’s straight-on belting.

so it’s...kind of uncomfortable seeing brendon do said full on belting and also a borderline striptease dance to “camisado” live (which, for those not in the know, is a song ryan ross wrote about his life with his abusive alcoholic father). and i’m not gonna pretend i have any say in whether or not ryan was okay with something so ruinously personal being performed in that kind of way when he was no longer in the band, but it SURE does sit kinda weird with me!

cause brendon is a belter, and that’s just kind of his one mode. this really got more apparent after vices and virtues (2011), and too weird to live, too rare to die (2013), because there was a little more emotional range there. but that pretty much dies out after those records and brendon kind of has these two moods for everything released here on out: it’s either “i love weed” or “i love my wife” and there’s not a lot of range between. he doesn’t have much in the way of moderation. my one single experience in attempting to see panic live (in 2019, no less. it wasn’t a good time lol) was just kind of...relentlessly high-energy regardless of the song, because again, that seems to be brendon’s one setting. he frantically climbs the scale and hits really high notes to keep the energy up without ever actually letting it dial down at any point. it’s not about playing to the song; it’s about reminding the audience, constantly, of what a vocal powerhouse he is, at all times. this does nothing whatsoever to counteract how emotionally flat he is as a performer.

remember that point i made about the differences between patrick’s performance of the high-energy original flavor young and menace and its acoustic piano version? well, you get a superficially similar instance in brendon’s renditions of “this is gospel” in both its original incarnation and the piano version, but i want to point out the difference in tone here. or rather, the fact that there kind of isn’t one. contextually, “this is gospel” is a pretty somber song. it was written for and about spencer smith and his struggles with addiction before his eventual departure from the band, but it’s kind of hard for me personally to reconcile that with the way brendon vocalizes it, even in what is supposed to be a slower, more intimate rendition of it.

this got more glaring in 2018 on pray for the wicked, which gave us “dying in la” which...is i guess, brendon’s attempt at some tonal diversity on an album that was basically back to front “CHECK OUT THIS WILD PARTY I’M AT” but it doesn’t really go anywhere, imo. it builds to something, but...doesn’t actually resolve. i’m gauging this all on vocals, not lyrics, because that’s the point of comparison i’m making - lyrics are a whole other kettle of fish. it’s just like, the guy cannot dial back even for a second and as a result there is NO variation in the way he performs, studio or live. after it’s been long enough, it just kind of starts to wear at you.

another very telling difference is how different patrick and brendon’s backing vocals are. backing vocals by definition need to be much more restrained than if you're taking lead. here's patrick backing travie in 2010 - he's very understated here. distinct and audible, giving us some nice vocal harmonies, but he keeps the spotlight very truly and deservedly on travie. this is also true for studio vocals, like on the lupe fiaso track "little weapon" from 2007 in which patrick isn't even one of the vocal features. he's audible if you know what to listen for, but most of his touch comes from the track's production and composition. more recently, here's patrick doing studio backing vocals in 2017 for a cover of "same drugs" with matt nathanson. once again, he's very good at dialing things back because he's not the lead here and he knows it.

let's contrast this with the cover 2010 panic did of "skid row" from little show of horrors, wherein dallon is meant to be the lead. fortunately dallon manages to shine regardless, but it's...a little jarring that brendon is ostensibly meant to be the support here but vocally and stylistically is belting like he's front and center. another telling instance is this performance of “america’s suitehearts” featuring brendon. in fairness, both patrick and brendon sound pretty rough here since this is a hard song to pull off! but brendon is supposed to be pulling support, and he’s riffing like he’s center stage. and it’s not particularly good riffing either lol.

“what a catch donnie” is the most egregious example of this though. i’ve said this before, but brendon REALLY sticks out in a not great way on what’s supposed to be a soulful, honorary vocal feature. the rest of the fueled by ramen guys singing along are doing their guest spots in a very understated, tonally consistent fashion: distinct in their own rights, if you know what to look for, but definitely doing what they can to fit into the tone of the song. brendon comes barreling in singing DANCE DANCE like this is his fucking show, and it sticks out so badly because he’s doing nothing whatsoever to conform to the tone of the piece.

a couple more points of comparison that i personally find really interesting:

“one of THOSE nights” off of the cab’s debut album whisper war (sidebar: GREAT ALBUM. i miss this band so fuckin much man) features both brendon and patrick; brendon is heard doing the post-chorus, and patrick does the final bridge and can be heard on the final chorus. both of them are belting here, but patrick’s got a strong emotion that suits the finish without being too overpowering and also crucially doesn’t just stay...flat.

patrick actually does backing vocals on a couple other tracks on whisper war, like “i’m a wonder,” and in both that track and “one of THOSE nights” you can hear how much technical and emotional dexterity he has. the former has him belting and the latter has him doing a very restrained backing falsetto.

folie a deux era gave us two gentle lullaby pieces for pete’s first kid. the first is “lullabye,” the album’s hidden bonus track. the second is “bronx’s lullaby.” patrick does the first, brendon does the second. the first sounds very gentle and tender, and the second sounds...i mean, i can tell what he’s going for. but it just kind of sounds ominous to me. so basically i can see why most people will talk about the former and ignore the latter lol lol

did you guys know brendon was on broadway. im kidding im kidding he has literally not shut up about being on broadway and seems to have made that his tertiary character trait since kinky boots. anyway here’s brendon sounding like brendon on kinky boots and basically performing the song like any other panic song. here is patrick covering rocky horror and nailing tim curry’s part. i don’t have any live covers of patrick to have a more accurate point of comparison (he’s in his studio here so he had the luxury of picking the best take) but i just think its fucking wild that patrick wasnt the one of them to go on broadway. fucks sake man.

i COULD compare the two of these guys covering queen but that just seems mean because fob was doing a whole entire studio session and brendon was just doing it over zoom and nah im just kidding i really am that petty. anyway here’s fall out boy covering under pressure and patrick dueting with himself and managing to nail both freddie mercury and david bowie’s parts without losing his own distinctive touch. here’s brendon doing his cover of under pressure and thanks i hate it.

lastly, cause i did my fuckin research here. here are some vocal coaches taking notes on live vocals for patrick and brendon respectively. you might note that they have a lot more notes to give to the latter, a lot more cautionary tales about how much brendon pushes his voice. if they do have critique to offer patrick, it’s in regards to clips of his prehiatus performances (or for that one 2013 thnks fr th mmrs performance when he was sick lol).

the bottom line for me is that patrick, stylistically, just has more range and more versatility. he can do virtually any genre - dancehall, rock, pop, rnb, hardcore, ska, funk, and SO MANY FUCKING MORE - and he can still sound distinctly himself. and for me, brendon only ever sounds like he’s singing the same song in the same genre; molding the song to suit his tastes and his range, and not the other way around.

all right thats all ive got steam for. patrick has always been a much more distinct and capable vocalist in my opinion and it kinda sucks that general public opinion seems to favor brendon so heavily cause brendon’s basically only got one emotional setting and couches the fact that he has no vocal dexterity in a lot of high notes and everyone just eats it up. it’s a diverting tactic and it’s worked. but that kinda seems to be brendon’s m.o. these days since he’s trying to shake low opinion of him by drumming up controversy and writing a song about a dude who hasn’t been in the same band as him in 13 years so

#askin hours #anon #i had to open so many incognito windows for this cause i dont want this infecting my youtubes lol #i just use youtube to watch vinesauce streams and once a month i rewatch line goes up and sherlock is garbage #ive also said this before but its really really telling to me how patrick and brendon get involved w other artists #patrick loves music. he loves composition he loves instrumentation #he loves writing songs for people and he'll sing if he's asked to but mostly he just loves music #brendon just seems to love attention. he never takes a project that doesn't put him in center stage

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witchofthesouls · 2 months

Text

(Anyone remembers that scenario with Getaway and Rodimus siring upon a Fae-Touched!Liaison that got cyberformed? Here we go again.)

Something bothers Getaway, far more than usual.

You had to change your approach. Getaway believes the Nudge-gun had reshaped your memories and it had.

But you got them back.

(A magic mirror once gleamed and asked What do you wish? with your own inverted face. Upon your answer, your doppelganger grinned a million fractals of glorious and damning shards. Splintered infinities and Truth. It reached out and placed a shard into each eye and you both bleed like monsters and gods.)

You stare into the mirror of the captain's private shower rack, and blue lenses and white pupils stare back.

If you stare long enough, you can divine the shards, each of them spinning and spinning, fracturing, repairing, growing, clawing out of the white-

The newspark cries and you snap back into the present.

The newspark cries and you nuzzle their soft body as they fret into your neck, tugging on the cables that mimic your hair, gumming on it. Milk-white optics blindly stare as they pur, slipping into your field, buzzing and yanking until you soothe it into a steady, easy pattern. They buzz, searching for a laughing sun that’s no longer with them.

Rodimus is gone. Getaway might as well be as he drowns in his captaincy.

The newspark purrs, no longer crying, and you plan.

_____

The thing is, Getaway lies.

It’s not condemnation. You know he lies. The problem lies where Getaway does it to himself as well. He believes in his own fabrications. A shallow mask that becomes his reality until something breaks it.

(Getaway could be the most marvelous actor if given the proper training and the chance, but it would eat him until he had nothing left to give, and you suppress the shiver that rolls down your spine at the ghostly, distant cheer of the starving, distorted voices.)

You can see it as he crushes you to the couch, when he watches you with hot-cold, hungry, optics across a room, when he pretends to sleep in the berth as you take care of the newspark, when he spins a dazzling tale to all the other mechs in the ship, when you cradle him in your lap…

This new vulnerability is strange from him. It began after Rodimus (and the others) had been left to fend for themselves.

Before Rodimus would sprawl across the couch, taking it over, and allowing you access, only to throw a leg across your lap with the newspark cradled on his chassis. Getaway would be either perched on the arm by your side or using your own legs as a cushion on the floor, viciously hogging the snack bowl and the remote until Rodimus finally relents to trade the bit.

You expected him to take Rodimus’ space on the couch on movie nights, but he doesn’t. He had taken the captaincy, the office, the berth, and even the snacks and personal products by Rodimus.

But strangely enough, he still perches on the couch’s arm by your side or sits by your feet, leaning on your legs. The newspark curls over the leftover space, seemingly so much smaller as they soak the faint remains of Rodimus’ biosignature.

Somewhere during the movie, Getaway will start drifting a hand up your leg, and will eventually find his way on your lap, pressing his face into you with a quiet almost-sigh. Field muddled in a not-quite agitated way until you ‘absentmindedly’ start to stroke across his back, careful not to go near his exposed neck.

The film keeps rolling into another and another without a word between you and him in this strange, truthful intimacy. It only breaks with the newspark fusses to be fed and then it’s time to move to the bedroom.

Some nights Getaway spawls across the berth, taking up the Rodimus-less space, turning into his pillow with little to say, besides a ‘good night’ and mimicking sleep as you settle in.

Some nights, he fucks you as he something to prove. Rutting you with a brutal force as he punches the air from your frame and drinks your expression with a burning focus, leaving both frames steaming and electrical burns on the sheets. In this mood, he doesn’t move from you. You learn to sleep under the weight of his frame and his spike still twitching inside you.

No matter what, he’s gone by the time you wake up.

_____

You don't like the look in Froid's optics. You barely like the mech at all.

Under that veil of professionalism is the spark of madness that’s familiar to you, that raw, consuming, and greedy hunger as he looks at you and your sparkling.

(Did Getaway tell him anything? Or did Froid figure it out?)

You titter guilelessly at the psychologist, turning into Getaway’s shoulder, murmuring sweet nothings as newlyweds in love do. Getaway is too well-trained to freeze from the sudden behavior, but he acts the part of a loving partner, pressing his mask to your crest. You hold his gaze and over the private comm, you tell him to be careful.

Froid has that same look of greed when he looks at Getaway.

______

In the privacy of the shared quarters and in bed, you feed the newspark and clearly state, “Be careful when you make deals. You don’t play directly against the house. Toll is unforgivable.”

He doesn’t answer. Pretending to sleep.

(Getaway likes to manipulate and play but he has a visceral need to be slanted in a good light. The fact he doesn’t even tries to soothe that worry or deny the accusation that he can’t handle himself is damning in and of itself.)

______

You leave the newspark with First Aid, who’s lonely in an empty medbay, and press a chaste kiss to his cheek, “Take good care of my darling moonbeam.”

First Aid asks what's wrong as your child barely fusses in his arms. Those blind optics stare at you in a strangely knowing manner before tucking into the medic for a nap, frame curling into the mech and field disappearing like morning dew.

You tell him a truth:

You need to clean house.

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spencethebence · 1 year

Text

I’m back on my Infinity Train hyper fixation again cause I picked back up a fic I’m writing for it and god I think every single head cannon for Lake is valid.

Lake is nb/trans? Valid, their character arc is all about being considered as a person and not some arbitrary trait like gender. Lake is girl? Valid, her character arc is all about being considered as a person and not some arbitrary trait like how you present your looks. Lake and Jesse are aromantic bestfriends? Valid, their relationship is never presented as anything more than good friends and that’s so wholesome. Lake and Jesse are soulmates? Valid cause their chemistry is so damn good.

I seriously eat it all up every single headcanon, every single AU it’s all good.

#txt #infinity train #infinity train book 2 #infinity train lake #lake infinity train #jesse cosay #jesse infinity train #jesslake

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xxwritemeastoryxx · 1 year

Text

I Had You

Author: xxwritemeastoryxx

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 3.6K

Warnings: Character ‘Death’, angst. Canon Infinity War, first time writing for Steve Rogers counts as a warning. 🤣

Author’s Note: Coming in hot for the last few hours of 2022. I wanted to get this out so much earlier, but the damn data/wifi has been shit this week for some reason. Anyways, I wanted to get this one out before I managed to toss this in the 'purge' pile. I wasn't about to have that so I finished it. It's not my best, but it definitely isn't my worst fic out there. Any feedback helps since it's the first I'm writing for Steve. Thanks for reading and Happy New Year Everyone! The dividers are by firefly-graphics.

I do not and will not ever give permission for my fics to be copied and posted on other sites. Don’t do it. Don’t be that person that ruins it for me and everyone else.

Feedback gives me life and motivation for future things. While likes are appreciated, reblogs are gold. Seriously, if you enjoyed this in the slightest, please reblog ♥

When Y/N had first discovered her powers, she never once believed they would be used like this. She never believed she’d be fighting beside others in an attempt to save the world from a Titan that was hell bent on collecting the infinity stones. And if anyone had told her those exact words years ago, she would have laughed in their face.

What she had expected was to fight alongside the Avengers when it was needed. Her training may have not been as experienced as the others, but her regenerative abilities made her one of their best weapons. She expected to be the one to help diffuse a rather sticky situation. She expected to be put in the line of fire to help the innocent.

But this, she never saw coming.

Everyone on my position. We have incoming.

That was the queue to get to Steve. That was the queue to be there and be ready for whatever it was they were about to face. But no matter what Y/N did to try and break free from the battles that were going on by the barrier, she couldn’t. It didn't matter which way she turned to leave, she was met with more of the creatures that charged at her.

She wasn’t sure how much time had passed between that signal and her continuing to help keep the creatures at the border. With each creature she killed she was met with a few more that surrounded her. And with each hit she took, she continued on.

At least that was until there was a shift in everything. An energy source blasted through the trees causing every human and creature to stop at the blast. Their eyes move straight for the trees. Everything within Y/N was telling her Wanda had destroyed the stone.

That should have been the end of it. There should have been some relief that the stone had been destroyed. Yet the satisfaction of the blast didn't fill Y/N as it should have.

But in the moments to follow, it was as if things had been reversed rather quickly. It left Y/N stunned when the energy source passed her again heading back into the treeline as if it never happened. And with that, silence eerily filled the air.

The creatures that fought so desperately to destroy them had stopped before they began retreating. As Y/N’s eyes began to scan the area around her, that’s when she first saw several of the warriors around her begin to fade into dust.

Her eyes widened in horror as she took it in before her. Her head shook as she turned in the direction Steve had last gone before he was calling out to all of them. Even looking in that direction, she saw others meeting the same fate.

Her hand quickly went up to her ear to call out to Steve, but her comms had gotten knocked out at some point. Even if she tried looking for it now, it wouldn't be fast enough. But it was as she began bringing her hand down that she noticed her hands began to flake.

Fear and panic filled her as she expected to completely disappear as the others had. Instead familiar pain rolled through her body as it began regenerating itself. She watched as the pieces that disintegrated before her eyes slowly heal. Without another thought, she began running.

There was now only two things that were going through her mind as she began running. There was a fear that the same thing was happening to Steve and her friends. She needed to get to them. Even if she didn’t make it in time, she hoped to see any of them for the briefest of moments. The other was the hope that if her body was fighting as it was, it could hang on long enough give up trying to disappear and she’d be fine. As she ran, memories began to flash before her eyes.

“You shouldn’t be so willing to put yourself in danger like that.” Steve’s voice carried into the room in the med bay. Y/N’s back was turned to him as he leaned against the frame.

Y/N scoffed and shook her head as she began removing the bandages that had been pointlessly put onto her skin. “That's a little hypocritical, don’t you think?”

“I meant denonating the bomb while being in range of it. Most people I know make sure they’re clear.”

“I had a job and I did it. Everyone’s safe and that’s what matters.”

“Except for you. I don’t even know how you’re even standing right now.”

Y/N zipped up her sweater once the bandages were removed and turned to face Steve to walk past him. “I’m all healed up Cap. So no need to make those worry lines permanent.”

Shock was written on his face trying to make sense of what just happened. Y/N had been through an explosion and had several injuries that should have made it so she was bedridden for weeks. Instead she was walking away as if it was another random Tuesday.

She pushed herself up over the small hill before making it into the treeline. For the briefest of seconds, she leaned up against the second tree she came across. But the moment her body leaned against it, it began disintegrating, forcing her to keep moving.

Even if she hadn't seen the others, everything within her was wanting and needing to see Steve. Her only goal was to get to him, to at least see him one last time. If he was safe, she could fight this for as long as she needed to. To keep fighting until whatever this was stopped. If he was gone, she hoped to hell that she could fight it off with whoever was left standing.

“Why didn’t you tell me you regenerate like that?”

Steve’s voice had caught her off guard causing her to stiffen as she looked over the city. It had been almost a year since Steve had tried lecturing her. He had never been able to put the pieces together. While some things could be written off as the cradle being used, other things left Steve scratching his head.

Soon the questions were forgotten when he began growing close with Y/N. While he had his moments of awkwardness, or even her moments of putting up a wall, they had found some way through it all to be together.

Y/N always kept her secret though. Very few people knew about her regenerative abilities and she liked keeping it that way. When it came to Steve…Y/N felt that telling him would change things. Out of selfishness, she wanted to hold on to that information for as long as possible.

It wasn’t until earlier today during a mission that Y/N had been burned by pushing a civilian out of the way of a plasma ray. Her body had been blistered and fried in many places. And if Steve hadn’t been kneeling beside her after the blast, he wouldn’t have believed if anyone told him that Y/N’s face healed right before his eyes.

She turned around to look at him. “Because you would look at me the way you are now.” Steve began shaking his head attempting to stop her, but she continued. “It’s not with pity or worry. You’re intrigued. Fascinated by the fact that now you have someone who can’t die on missions.”

“Believe it or not, I’m more hurt that you didn’t feel like you could trust me with that information.” He sighed as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Who else knows?”

“Fury.” She watched as he rolled his eyes. “Hydra.” She watched as his eyes shot back to her at her words. “Nat, only because she stumbled upon my secret just as you had. Fury fixes my records anytime I’m in the med bay. No one else knows. It's why a majority of the time I take forever getting to the rendezvous point after missions. I wait until my face is healed so no one questions things.” She walked over to stand in front of him as he took in the details. “It’s not that I don’t trust you. Because I trust you with everything else.”

“But not this?”

She shook her head. “I was afraid that once you knew, it’d be me that would be put in the line of fire. Because in the world of ‘whatever it takes’ I’d be the ‘whatever’ every time.”

Steve shook his head and brought his hand up to her cheek. “I promise you that I would never do that to you. I hate seeing you hurt and I would never intentionally put you through that for the sake of a mission.”

Just a little farther. Was all Y/N kept telling herself. Her pace in running had slowed to a stumbling jog. Her feet no longer balanced as they used to be as her body fought to stay together. She knew at some point she'd reach the others. They had to be close.

She could hear the voices in the distance calling out to others. Every part of her being, even the pieces currently regenerating, was hoping Steve hadn't disappeared like the others.

"I know I've said this a time or two before, but for a moment there I really thought I lost you." Steve's voice held the weight of relief.

A weak chuckle passed Y/N's lips as she took in her surroundings. Her body aches in places from spending the last few weeks regenerating. "Got you three to stop fighting. Mission successful."

A huff of a scoff came from Steve as he shook his head. "Good to know your sense of humor never changes." Steve gently took a hold of her hand. "Tony thought he killed you." He watched as she opened her mouth to speak but he continued. "You've never been hurt that badly before. The other times you could walk it off easily. I've never once heard you cry out in pain like that. It's a sound I'd rather not hear again."

The echoes of Y/N's screams still played within his ears. From the moment the blast from Tony's repulsor. While it was aimed at Bucky and Steve, Y/N found herself between them, earning a direct hit to her chest. Something that should have easily killed a human that wasn't enhanced with super serum or wearing any armor.

"Doubt there would be a chance to pull off another heroic act." While her tone held humor, it was the truth. They were supposed to be on the run. Anything that put attention on them would get them caught.

"I wouldn't say there wasn't a chance." That caused Y/N's eyebrow to raise. The familiar look on Steve's face gives her more information than his words do. "Not saying for you to jump right in because you definitely need more time to heal. Just depends on how well you can stay under the radar. "

"I'm surprised you aren't out there already."

"Couldn't do it without you being there by my side."

There were several things running through Steve as he knelt on the floor in disbelief staring at the exact spot his best friend had been standing moments ago. One being what was happening now that Thanos had snapped his fingers. His mind was refusing to wrap around the events he had just witnessed as Bucky turned to dust. The other surge of thoughts was what if the same thing was happening to Y/N?

Y/N

It was the thought of her that instantly brought Steve out of his semi frozen state and began looking for her. He knew he hadn't seen her in the moments that Thanos had been there. While part of him didn't know if he should be relieved by that information or worried by it. If she hadn't been close by and the same thing happened to her, he wouldn't know.

"Anyone got eyes on Y/N?" He called

He could hear Rhody calling for Sam in the background. His ears could pick up on the other cries of disbelief at allies simply disappearing right before their eyes.

When Steve couldn't find her in his nearest surroundings, he began making his way towards where they had been stationed by the perimeter. If there was still a chance she was there, he'd find her. He refused to think about what it meant to lose Y/N and Bucky at that moment. Losing one was going to be hard. Losing both, his brain and heart couldn't even begin to form a string of responses.

His feet had only carried himself a short distance before he caught movement in the trees ahead of him. There was the sound of stumbling as feet shuffled forward. A moment later Y/N came into his view.

The second Steve’s eyes landed on Y/N he knew something was wrong. It was the way her brows were furrowed as her body attempted to piece itself back together as quickly as it could. He learned from experience that her wearing that look was never good.

The pain she must have been feeling in that second had nothing to do with the possible aches and pains that came from fighting during a mission. She never felt the normal pains that came with it like he had. Her body could easily heal itself within minutes. But the last time she had that look on her face, her body had taken weeks to heal after she had shielded him from a blast from Tony’s repulsor back in Siberia.

“Y/N?” He called out as he began quickly walking towards her.

Her eyes shot up to him and a sudden sense of relief had washed over her. He was still there and okay. He hadn’t disappeared like the other she had seen on her way over there to find him. He was still there and she hadn’t been too late.

Her feet moved into a run the moment her eyes landed on him. She needed to not only see him, but be in his arms. And the moment she was, she tried her hardest to wrap her arms around him. But the slightest pressure felt off. It felt wrong as her body tried to regenerate itself.

Steve hadn’t missed the way the particles had moved away from her just as it had the others. Just as he had seen with Bucky. He hadn’t missed the way her body was disappearing from the effect of Thanos’s snap. Or the way her body was fighting to regenerate itself just as quickly.

“I didn’t think I’d make it.” Y/N’s words were rushed. She needed to get the words out as quickly as she could since she didn’t know how much longer she could fight this off.

“I’ve got you.” Steve hadn’t missed the way her body tried to evaporate the moment his arms wrapped around her. She was going right before his eyes but her body was fighting it. The pieces that were quickly disappearing were regenerating just as quickly in an attempt to keep her together.

No one else has fought it off. No one else had been capable of doing so. Her body was working in overdrive to piece her back together when the stones were ripping her to pieces. If anyone could fight it, it had to be Y/N.

Steve slowly brought them down to their knees. The grip Y/N had on Steve lessened by the second before the slightest pressure reappeared. An ongoing cycle in the span of a few seconds.

"I don't know what's happening." The words were rushed as they left Y/N.

"You're fighting it." Steve's voice was soft. "We can find a way to stop it."

Y/N heard the hopefulness in his voice, along with the fear. It caused a sad smile to pull at her lips as she looked up at him. "We don't even know if there is a way."

"We'll keep trying until there is one." He promised. He brought up his hand to her face and as his thumb ran along her cheek he could easily see the way her skin disintegrated into nothing before her body fought hard to piece her back together.

The sound of the others finding them hadn't gone unnoticed by the two. But they kept their attention on each other. The next few moments were too important for them to look towards the others.

"What if I can't-" A jolt of pain shot through her, causing a scream to pass her lips.

With the scream, Steve's grip tightened on her. The ache in his chest grew by the second. He watched as her body regenerated at a slower pace in comparison to how it had been seconds before.

The pain that radiates through her body was like nothing she had ever experienced before. She had limbs ripped into and should have been dead on several occasions. Nothing she experienced as an agent and then as an Avenger had ever felt like this. Her body felt like it was being torn apart repeatedly as her body tried to keep up. But it was becoming useless.

“It hurts.” Her lips trembled as her body continued to fight against what was happening to her. "I don't know how long I can keep fighting it."

Steve's eyes looked over her face, taking in every detail of her. Everything his eyes landed on, he committed further to memory. As much as he hated to even begin to think of the words he needed to tell her, he knew she needed to hear them.

The string of thoughts that his brain refused to create earlier were now there in full force. He was about to lose both of the people he cared about most. He couldn't even begin to help Bucky and that ate away a part of him already. With Y/N, she could only hold on for so long before it became unbearable.

He couldn't keep her in the pain she was feeling. She couldn't stay that way until they found a way to keep her from turning into dust. He couldn't do that to her. Not when he made a promise to her. It was as tears began falling from her eyes that his mind had accepted what was going to happen.

He nodded his head, more to himself than to her. “Don’t fight it. It will happen quickly. The harder you fight, the more it will hurt. "

Steve had no idea if that was the case. He had no idea if letting go would be painless for her. But if it gave her the peace she needed to let go, he'd tell her whatever she needed.

Y/N shook her head slightly, particles drifting off more as she did. "I-"

"No goodbyes." He quickly added in to stop her from saying what she wanted. "I won't stop until we fix this. Always fighting to the very end with you, remember"

"Wouldn't have it any other way." A sad chuckle followed before she took a deep breath.

"Do you ever think about stopping?" Y/N asked as she packed her duffle bag.

Steve stopped mid packing the weapons bag before looking over his shoulder. "Stopping what exactly?"

Y/N shrugged her shoulders slightly. "The undercover missions? We're on the run and still doing missions." Her eyes moved up to meet his. "Have you thought about one day you'd want to stop? Have a life outside of the heroics?"

He actually had to stop and think about that answer. For as much as they had been doing side missions after the Accords went south, he hadn't been thinking about stopping any time soon. He had only thought about continuing to help those in need while avoiding the authorities.

"I can't say I have." He said with a slight nod of his head before continuing to pack the bag before zipping it closed. He turned his attention to her. "Have you?"

She added the last of her makeshift tactical gear before closing her duffle bag. "Not to stop now." She admitted. "But there will be a day that I will want to stop fighting. I just wonder if you'd be willing to stop with me?"

Steve closed the distance between them before wrapping his arms around her. The comfort of his arms around her was enough to bring a smile to her face as she looked up at him.

"The day you decide you're done, is the day I'll stop. But until then I will fight until the very end with you by my side." For as long as he'd known her, stopping wasn't in her nature. He actually had to be the one to convince her to take a break. If she was done, that was saying something.

A small smirk pulled at her lips. "With Sam, Nat and Bucky close by, right?"

A laugh passed his lips. "Wouldn't have it any other way."

Y/N's eyes never left Steve's as she forced her body to relax. For the first time in her life she wasn't allowing her body to heal her as it had all the times before. She'd have to stop fighting. Not in the way she ever believe she would. She watched as his eyes glassed over before he blinked back the tears as much as he could.

Steve hadn't missed the moment her body relaxed. The moment it had, he watched as her body disintegrated just as fast the others had before. With the weight of her body gone, his hands and arms to drop quickly to his lap.

The reminants of dust laid around him. The silence that came with the snap was nothing in comparison to the silence with Y/N gone. And as he looked up at the others the same question laid within their eyes.

What exactly happened? And how the hell do they fix it.

All WorksTag (The tag to be notified for everything I write):

@mrs-maximoff-kenner @mizzzpink @friendelius @thatfanficstuff @mushroomelephant @23victoria @avengers-fixation

Excelsior Tag(All MCU fics):

@hellotvshowtrash @dpaccione @old-enough-to-know-better73 @elijahs-wife @kpopgirlbtssvt @theartofhotchinthesnow @bluebear142077 @thatweirdoleigh @loving-life-my-way

Captain America Tag (For only and all things Steve):

@fandom-princess-forevermore @freyathehuntress

#Steve Rogers #Steve Rogers fanfiction #Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader #Reader Insert #Captain America #captain america fanfiction #Captain America x fem!Reader #MCU #mcu fanfiction #Last fic of 2022 #Steve Rogers Angst #Infinity War canon

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tiny012 · 9 months

Note

I seem to recall in the awful Sailor Moon Reddit someone (an anti-manga stan) whining how Usagi becomes continuously powerful throughout the arcs, a Queen in the future and then made some bogus claim she was a megalomanic (which goes to show you what a moron that person is) all because Naoko made her Girl Wonder in her own story SHE WROTE. They really believe the Sailor Guardians were depicted as nothing more than her appendages. The Mary Sue claim is just probably from salty 90s fans.

Oh I heard the Manga/Crystal Senshi being called "Batteries" for Usagi because they dare give her their energy in order for her to defeat a big bad...

It's not like in the 90's anime they do that many times....

Hell in the 90's anime they barely do that...

Because they barely have the energy to give because they don't have the power ups like they do in the Manga....

Since they can't defeat a youma,subvillian or big bad without her...

I have said this before I'm just going to say this again.

Like the Power Structure would be this

Sailor Moon and Sailor Saturn- Top Tire since they represent Birth ,Healing,Rebirth,Restoration, Destruction and Death

Outer Senshi- Next Since they supposed to be the definers of outside threats

Inner Senshi- Since they supposed to be Serenity Protectors and defend inside threats. Also since their powers was more elemental than anything.

Chibiusa- Since she’s a Senshi in training.

But it still was a balance because the Inner senshi still got power ups a little after Usagi did got hers.

For Example

Usagi got Supers in the middle of Infinity arc while they got theirs at the end.

Usagi got Super Transformation permanently and power up the beginning of Dream while they are getting their power up as the arc goes on with an act focus on them and their dreams.

They all turn Eternal at the same time as she got hers.

So Usagi is always one step in front but they are always one step behind her.

But they still try to be useful to Usagi and was there when she needed them aka final battles.

With the 90′s anime..

The power gap got WIDER as the series went on.

Like in Super S Usagi and Chibs had their SuperS Transformations permanently for 16 episodes BEFORE the senshi finally get theirs.

They did get their new attacks until the season was almost over.

Usagi turns Eternal in Stars but they don’t at all.

So this upgrade in SuperS is their final upgrade of the series which makes sense Galaxia took them out in one swoop compared to the manga that she took them down two by two.

So Usagi like on the top floor of the building while they are in the damn basement.

It’s getting to point that the don’t even need to be there cause even they attacks don’t do shit.

But they still want to talk about Usagi leadership skills tho.

But their asses are not a great support staff.

#tanya rants about SM

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retconsatlightspeed · 7 months

Text

The Saber & The Last Jedi

Continuing my post about Luke on the Island, I think I want to focus in on how I would have handled that weighty piece of symbolism.

It's a common talking point among the chuds that Luke tossing the saber was "disrespectful" to starwars fans, and while I think most of them are idiots, I think I'd change how that note was played.

Like a lot of fans of the 1.5 good movies in the sequel trilogy, I was really disappointed that Rey didn't get her own saber (or any actual jedi training but that's for another post) until post the resolution.

Fallen Order is by far my favourite piece of starwars media ever, so I'm infinity biased towards meaningful character growth as expressed through laser sword construction.

So here's my Pitch:

Have Luke drop the saber after Rey hands it to him. Holding it with reverence for but a moment before it slips from his hands. Play the following moment for laughs, sure, as a shocked Rey races after the priceless heirloom down all those stone steps she just spent an hour walking up before it tumbles into the sea (have her make that adorable panic/confounded scrunchy face) but then we turn the camera back to Luke and we see our lost hero is awash in utmost sorrow. For Rey the saber symbolizes hope, heroism, king arthur style YOU ARE THE CHOSEN ONE shit. Her job was to get it back to him, a nobody playing errand girl for a legend. For Luke, that sword is a representation of all his failures. His failure to live up to the legacy of the Jedi, his initial failure to defeat Vader, his later failure to stop Kylo, his failure to protect the galaxy since. That saber is HEAVY, and he cannot carry that weight.

The Saber is going to be the central motif around which this mentor student relationship is going to be formed. It's a passing of the torch, but not in the heavy handed IP servicing manner of Rey taking on the skywalker name. We're going to go back to the roots of Starwars as a Samurai story, As a martial arts story, and we're going to do it using the themes that episode 7 established god damn it.

Quick recap of my headcanons and a few things you need to know:

Forces awakens is centrally ABOUT the legacy of Starwars. There's nostalgia and fan service, yes, but it also has a lot to say ABOUT nostalgia. That's why our main villain is a Darth Vader fanboy who's at the head of an army of Neonazis, none of which are happy that all these... other people hold any power in the galaxy

In my own telling of events, Luke went to the island not to give up, but in an attempt to reconnect with the force after Kylo defeated him and severed his connection. His isolation started as an attempt to become the hero the galaxy needed him to be again, and he's all but lost hope.

Rey asks Luke to come back and join the fight, Luke says he can't, he's not ready. Delightful bickering ensues with Rey being flabbergasted that the hero she's been inspired by since childhood would sit by let things in the galaxy get worse (hey there new fans, this remind you of anything?). Luke, now a crabby old man, gets to use all of Mark Hamil's genius comedic delivery.

Eventually we're led to a scenic overlook/meditation circle and Luke Challenges Rey to reach out and feel the island. It's a holy place, suffused with the force, and here we get to see a bit of what Luke must have been like as a teacher, calmly guiding her through the opening of her force-sense the way that Obi-wan taught him.

Luke, serious: "Can you feel it... can you FEEL it? Racing through everything, Binding everything together? " Rey, awed: " Yes... I think...I Yes I.." Luke, deadpan " .....because I can't"

More Shocked Rey, more bickering, Luke's getting more resentful, it's like the galaxy threw this girl in his face to remind him of everything he failed at (it did, he just hasn't realized what that MEANS yet). Luke puts his foot down and tells her to go home, he'll come back when the force has spoken to him and told him how to fix all this.

Rey almost considers it... she takes a step down the trail while Luke moves to return to his hermitage, there's a pause.

R, hesitant, turning something over in her mind, knows Luke is carrying so many burdens and she's about to add more: "You really can't feel the force anymore?" L, irritated, barely paying her any more attention: no R, turning to face him: Then you wouldn't know.... Han Solo, he's dead.

Luke, looks at her, all his sourness melting away but it's different than when he held the sword. This isn't the old Jedi master feeling the weight of his burden, this is Luke Skywalker, the boy who risked everything to save his best friends, learning that one of those friends has died and he didn't even know. Twenty years on a rock trying to find an answer to save his friends and he's STILL failing them. He crumples, Rey rushes to pick him up she's all apologies she barely understands. She was there she saw it happen, she let it happen, she FELT it happen

L, talking over her, grabbing onto her robes and arms to PULL himself up and look at her face to face, there is a FIRE in his eyes now, This is Anakin's son. : "Come inside, Tell me Everything"

There's a few more beats I want to hit but I'm not sure about the exact order.

Luke Reunite with Chewie and R2

Evening's fallen and Luke comes to share Rey's fire as she looks out over the sea. A shared sorrow has bridged the gap between them a little. Luke insists that he can't come back, Rey protests, but he interjects that he can still do good. He's willing to teach her. She felt the island so she must have some talent. Rey is blindsided, she honoured by the prospect but she thought she was just bringing Luke back, she doesn't have time to train, she has to get back to her friends, the resistance, the fight against the first order. Can't he come back with her? Luke clues her in that the force brought them both here, to this place, it's special, it's their chance to rebuild the Jedi the right way.

Something something subspace beacon signalling back to their friends that they're alright. Gives us a chance to cut away to the B story for a while.

Rey's training is going spottily. she's got an instinctive connection with the force, bolstered by the island, but she's chafing against the Jedi temple approved curriculum that Luke salvaged from his first school/the empire's archives. She already KNOWS how to fight, but she's trained with a staff, so when they're using training swords she keeps attacking form a further reach or grabbing what would be the lightsaber's blade. Luke chides her about burning off her hand (he's got a metal one)

After a particular frustrating lesson they get into Rey's preconceived notions of what the Jedi were like ( more accurately, what LUKE was like, because that's her one touch stone) and how when she was left alone on Jakku she would imagine all these things. T, and then a pause about Rey being left alone, a comedic and decisive " I'm NOT your father" from Luke, followed up with " One thing I've learned, you don't need to be from somewhere to be special. The force doesn't care, and its better that way" . This leads them to commiserating about how AWFUL their respective desert planets were. We see that they're growing closer.

Also a chance for Luke to hint about his personal life, he was close to a few people over the years ( Wiggle room for every shipper in the galaxy), but between dismantling the empire and founding the new Jedi he never had time to start a family, there was always something else ( here we see how much being "the hero" has taken from him.)

End of the movie's coming up, it's been something like a month or two. Rey's weathered and calloused but she's in the best fighting shape she's ever been. She's got pretty good with the lightsaber but it's slow going. Luke's really gotten back into teaching, Rey help inspired hope in him, but now he's putting the weight of heroism onto her shoulders, hoping that she can correct HIS failures, the way Obi-wan did with him. R2 has been waging war against the porgs infesting the falcon, Chewie has himself a cozy little fishing hut by the shoreline and is fully on vacation by this point.

Rey fails yet another Jedi test, both she and Luke are frustrated. Our friends have recovered important information in the B plot and Rey knows that if she doesn't rejoin them soon she's effectively going to miss out on the next movie. A forboding storm thunders on the horizon, Luke catches Rey looking at it and cautions " You're not ready for that" , idly rubbing the place where he lost his hand. Rey questions whether she'll ever be ready. She's not him, she's not a Jedi, she's Rey from knowhere and however lucky she's been up to this point she was never MEANT to be here. It SHOULD be him. Luke feels shame again, and ends the lesson, tells her to get ready for supper. Rey eyes a nearby boat.

Cut ahead, Chewie's got a weird but delicious alien fish ready to eat and the rain is baring down outside. Asks where Rey is and we have a bit of fun with the puppets, before he looks outside the window and centers our view of a section of jagged rock barely cresting out of the waves, far from the island.

Rey's paddled out to this crumbling stone edifice and is doing saber katas on the stones in the middle of the storm. It's clear that she's done this before but never in such harsh weather. She slips, makes mistakes, but keeps on with it. Her form is approaching the super elaborate flourishes of the prequel era. The thunder rumbles and lighting strikes one of the rocks nearby her, causing it to crumble. She refocuses on the storm. The rumble reminds her of the earth splitting open back at starkiller base, jumping between rocks reminds her of her fight with Kylo. She goes through it again, harder, trying to make up for inexperience with effort. The wind howls worse and thunder rumbles again, Rey leaps in the air and DEFLECTS LIGHTING WITH HER SWORD, causing the bolt to streak off and cause an explosion in the water. Then another, then another, She HAS THIS, mostly.

Out of the depths comes a giant predatory eel monster, drawn by the explosions and looking for a snack. She could probably take it if they were on a level playing field, but she's on a very un-level series of rock pillars and is going to have to fight both the monster AND the weather.

The fight is tense, jumping between rocks, dodging waves and lighting bolts and razor teeth, slipping and falling into the water, barely managing to scramble out. Just when she's ready to land a killing blow the beast thrashes, getting hold of her leg in its jaw and CRUNCHES, shredding muscle and bone before throwing her aside to brutally impact a stone pillar and sending the saber out into the ocean. Ray, desperate, knowing the creature is closing in reaches out for her weapon with the force just like she did at the end of the last film.. and just like last time it comes ripping through the air, only to be struck by lightning in the middle of its arc. Shock sets in, she tries to get up and it becomes very evident that she's both badly injured and has broken atleast one of her legs. Disbelief surges through her, shame, failure. Getting the shit kicked out of her might not be worse that DESTROYING LUKE SKYWALKER'S LIGHTSABER.

The beast rises, ready to devour her. Rey's hurt it and there's more malice than hunger in its eyes at this point. The thunder rumbles again, and there's a flash... and the familiar sound of the Millennium Falcon's guns firing cuts through the sound of the storm as it lands a direct hit on the monster.

Cut to Luke Skywalker in the GUNNER SEAT . He's left the island and in a moment of desperation he's remembered that he was still a hero LONG before he became a Jedi Master. Force or no force he's still that idiot farmboy who heard the call of someone in trouble and left everything behind to save them. With Chewie at the helm The Falcon does a strafing run through the storm to scare the eel away before lowering down its platform to get Rey back up. Cut to a shot of Luke on the platform bathed in light which is shining down on Rey, his hand outstretched to her this time, the hero she heard about as a kid. The Force has delivered the answer he sought.

It's the next day, the storm has parted and the clouds are picking up the colours of sunrise. Rey's bandaged as best they can, wrapped in a blanket, Luke's changed out of his hermit robes and into something nice... ish. They look out over the water and once the niceties are out of the way, Luke Mentions that they're getting ready to leave.

Rey is shocked, she's not ready, she wasn't ready for the lighting stones so she won't ever be ready, she's never going to be a Jedi.

Luke agrees, but maybe that's not such a bad thing. Like him the Jedi lost sight of the people for the sake of an ideal, and trying to stick to that ideal is what kept him on this island while the galaxy descended into war yet again. It was the same dogmatism that let his father sip down the darkside and doomed the old republic. Doomed them. In trying to recreate their ways he was losing sight of the people again, lost sight of his nephew.

He will be the last Jedi, but she's going to be something else, something better, and he's going to Be there for her the way he wishes his mentors could have been there for him.

The sun's risen while they were talking, Chewie roars, R2 beeps, It's time to get going. Luke says he's all packed and pats the holster containing the Jedi texts he collected, but asks her if there's anything she's forgetting.

Rey's puzzled, before Luke nods to the sea.

R: " But It's... I lost it, it's gone" L: "Nothing's ever gone, It just... changes, and everything has to change sometime."

Rey holds her hand out to the ocean, tentatively, she pulls, but her force falters, her faith wavers. Luke's hand settles over hers. He still hasn't gotten his powers back, but together they pull and the broken pieces of his lightsaber come up from the water, glistening, dawn playing in the kyber crystal.

The Gang takes off in the Falcon, off into what we realize is a binary sunrise, it's a long hyperspace Journey back to the Resistance. Interspersed we see Rey tinkering on something, putting that scavenger knowhow to use. The Falcon Lands, we have a wordness reunion between our friends. Luke and Leia, Rey, Finn, Poe, and Rose (looking a little worse for wear after their adventures). Everyone is crowding around Luke, but we see Rey being helped into a high tech cast, which allows her to stand on her injured leg Without needing to use her staff, like she has been since disembarking. Standing proudly as she can, and mostly to show off to her friends, flips a newly installed switch midway down the haft, causing the upper end to ignite in a flickering blade, the Pieces of Luke's old saber incorperated into its design. It's not like any lightsaber that's come before it, but it's hers. The shot pans out as she realizes that more and more eyes are turning to her, Luke having silently directed all the attention that was on him to her, his apprentice.

The torch has been passed, and we have a new hero.

#ep8 #luke #rey #starwars meta #damn this was a long one

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