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grigori77 · 4 days

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Critical Role, Campaign 3 Epsiode 92

Oh yeah ... just getting it off exactly how it needs to given all the massive feels we're gonna get, right? Way to go, Marisha, filling in for Sam JUST RIGHT at the start ... XD "Off off off ... THIS hotdog ... BITES BACK." Oh wow ... yeah this whole plug's just been derailed before she can even start ... wait ... what? A dump cake? Oh boy ... "catterpilling"? Is this something I maybe don't actually wanna know about? Yes, GO OFF, Marisha! Give Riegel a damn good seeing to even though he's not here ... Liam: "This is Orym's Form of Dread." Matt: "I hate everything about this."

Yeah ... so here we go, then ... we were a puddle of ruination at the end of last week's episode ... what further emotional devastation are we in for THIS week? I'm not ready ...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Please don't remind me of the pain ... and yet, we must ...

So seriously, is Liliana with THEM now? How does this work?

They're OUTSIDE the city? Well, that's actually kind of LUCKY ...

This is all SO complicated ... CAN we trust her? Well ... I mean ... she IS giving us a pretty useful loredump right now ...

Oh right, here we go ... time for the conflicting theological viewpoints to fuck up what fragile peace we got going here right now ...

Exactly ... apathy in something THAT POWERFUL could be EXTREMELY dangerous to BOTH worlds ...

TO THE MOUNTAIN!!!

So ... is she voluneering to be a spy? A double-agent in the fight? Howcan we be sur she's trustworthy to begin with? I'm sorry,. but I'm really NOT sold on Liliana suddenly being repentant right now ...

He made contact 300 YEARS AGO? Holy fuck ...

Any more Vessels? Hmmm ... that's worrying too ... Ludinus ain't even HERE? He's back on Exandria? Interesting ...

Evoroa knows where he is? Okay ...

Yay! Religious persecution! What fun! Oof ... okay, seriously, I get where she's coming from, but this is REALLY dngerous even so ... there's no good end to this situation, no matter what they do, it's all totally FUCKED already ...

LILIANA TEMULT BACKSTORY!!! O.O

Time for escape ... yeah, this is gonna be interesting ...

They just JUMPED all the way to the Bloody Bridge? Holy fuck ... wait ... ARE THEY here? This sounds an awful lot like they're not ACTUALLY there ... is this just an illiusion or is she shielding them somehow?

GO!!! GO NOW!!! Like, STUPID FAST!!!

Liliana is BENDING TIME round her? Forcing it to go slow? Holy shit ...

WHOOSH!!! On the way home, then ...

Wait! What do they do when they GET THERE again? Oh shit ...

ARE THEY back at the Malleus Key? Oh fuck, they are ... shit! What the fuck ... oh, they STILL can't se them? How the hell is she managing to make THIS work? So far away like this ... how long do they have left?

Yeah ... maybe Pass Without a Trace is NOT smart just yet ... YES!!! Deception sounds wiser ... time to walk out whistling ...

Disguise Self etc ... hmmm ... so they're gonna BLUFF it out, then ...

Laura, how the HELL could you roll a Crit Fail RIGHT NOW? Oh fuck this is THE WORST ... this is going to go SO BAD ... this is gonna be like a fucking CAR CRASH ...

Mystics ... BALLS ... and now they're being INTERCEPTED ...

They're RAISING ALARM ... oh this just keeps getting worse ... crap ... CRAP CRAP CRAPPITY CRAP-CRAP-CRAP ...

Twinned Spell Phantasmal Force? Okay, Laudna ... I'm REALLY hoping this works ... this is like a total fucking Hail Mary right now ...

BLUFF!!! Please let this work ... HOLY FUCK!!! I cannot fucking believe this ... O.O

NOW you're looking for Planerider Ryn? NOW?!!!

Matt: "Orym rolls high enough to see into the REAL dimension ..." Liam: "What does that mean?" Laura: "Atreyu!" LOL

Go WEST young man ... and others ... um ...

Graveyard of holy warriors ... charming ... Matt described THIS a little TOO well and it's harrowing ...

Get word out as quick as possible ... Yay! Keyleth! And like always Matt STILL plays her as awkward. It's adorable ... XD

Laura (to Travis): "Hey! Fuck off!" Liam: "They were such an adorable couple." Marisha: "Hash-tag goals!"

Exhaustion? Oh fuck, guys ... yeah, this is gonna make it tougher ...

I can't believe they're actually MANAGING to get away ...

And NOW the loss is finally hitting them ... oh fuck ... this is gonna be SO MUCH WORSE than if they'd actually BEEN ABLE to process right away ...

Yeah ... IS that bond between mother and daughter TRULY lost for good?

Oh Laudna ... dead girl needs a hug so bad ...

Otohan's shit? Here we go ... oh yeah, Orym's gonna go OFF right now ... fuck ...

"RIP FCG" ... Marisha's fan ... awwww ... but also that's making me cry a bit ...

Oh, so Evoroa is just COMPLETELY beside herself right now and I don't blame her, this WOULD be a weird experience for her ... and I suppose THIS place isn't a good introduction for herin real life ...

Ludinus is in AEOR?!!! How the FUCK is that supposed to work?

MFMM indeed ...

The "Dominox"?

I love Laudna being EXTRA twitchy-creepy when she's excited ... :3

Travis: "CAN YOU STOP INTERRUPTING THE STORY!!!" Laura: "I'm sorry!" (continues to interrupt)

We're only just NOW remembering FRIDA? Oh fuck ...

Yes! Feed the Bormodo ... awww ... :3

Oh yeah, that sword is just BAD FUCKING NEWS, definitely. "Ishta the Summit Blade"? Charming ...

Just pushing on until they reach safety, then ...

A rare Ashton/Laudna heart-to-heart ... hmmm ...

And now Imogen's checking on a very fragile Orym ... oh man ... oh yeah, Wee Man is in a very dark place right now and I want to hug him so tight ... yeah, I think we're ALL gonna miss Letters. Imogen: "They were ... they were ALIVE." Oh ... fuck ...

Oh ... the Sending Stone? Orym tries to contact Dorian ... fuck ... PLEASE let this work this time ... oh fuck, this message ...

LEAVE THE TABLE?!!! What the sweet FUCK?!!! Matthew, what the FUCK is this? What are you doing?

Wait ... Matt, where the hell are you ... O.O AABRIA?!!! Holy FUCK!!!

And now ... a break ... while I try to make sense of THIS insane new twist ...

Wait ... THE CROWN KEEPERS?!!! Holy shit ... and now Matt's at the table as a PLAYER again ... and ROBBIE!!! It's been SO LONG, man ... we've missed you so much ...

So basically this is Exandria Unlimited continued ... hmmm ...

Ah, here we go ... the Solstice ... cuz this is A LOT of catching up to do ...

Zephra? Sounds like the best place, really ... so ... time to catch up PROPER with the group, then ...

Oh yeah, Fy'ra is SO VERY MUCH the Mom friend in this group ...

Wow ... Opal's clearly UNRAVELLING a bit right now ... that's not good at all ...

Ah ... yes ... TED ...

Crap ... THIS can't be god ... a Wisdom save? Balls ... bad sign ...

TALK ABOUT asking for a Perception check with FORCE ... "the SPOOKIEST 20!" XD

Aabria: "I will not give you my true name!" Robbie: "Your choices are Poska and Goblin!" XD

What the fuck ... did Opal just TURN EVIL?!!!

Huh ... Aabria's on the move, that's ... INTERESTING ... and now we got a Battlemap ... oh boy ... we're just getting RIGHT INTO IT, clearly ... I'm suddenly VERY SCARED for everybody ...

Wow ... so now it looks like it's Aimee against EVERYBODY ELSE ...this just got EVEN WORSE ...

Fuck! So TED is in charge, now? Or soebody WORSE ... that's so bad ... O.O Oh balls, it's WAY worse than that ...

Webbing? Yup, definitely some monstrous evil spider goddess, then ... I think we know who THIS is then ...

Aimee has to make the impossible Sophie's Choice ... and Aabria is FORBIDDING HER from pulling any punches ... great ...

Oh yeah, possessed Opal is setting out to full-on MURDER Fy'ra ... 2 D10s PLUS TEn TO EACH?!!! Oh fuck ... yeah, that sounds PAINFUL ... and NOW we're rolling for Initiative ...

Matt rolled a NINE for his Initiative ... of course he did ... "Dariax is BACK, baby!" XD

Morrighan is itching for ANYTHING to target besides Opal ... but there's ONLY HER ... hmmm ... wait ... cast HASTE on Opal? Huh? O.O Oh no, on HERSELF ... okay ... ah yes, Rabbit Hop, yeah ... Vow of Enmity? OKAY ... Aabria: "Okay, this sounds REALLY AGGRESSIVE, and I LIKE IT!" And now we need a refresher on the mechanics of Haste ... Divine Smite? Oh yeah ... at 4th Level? oof ... Morrighan is NOT holding back AT ALL ... 27 points of Radiant damage ... yeah, that's HARD ...and she's apologising the whole time ...

Wait ... NONE OF THAT touches Opal? How the FUCK?!!!

"Meat beast bandersnatch Opel" is a description that goes SO HARD, Aabria!

So, second attack from Morrighan ... "Fuck you, Ted!" Yeah, definitely ... 22 points ... oh shit ... SHiELD?!!! Sneaky ... oh wait ... is Ted trying to PROTECT Opal? I'm so confused, now ...

Aabria ragging on the Marisha hotdog and Matt just looking SO sheepish ... I love it ... XD

A gemstone dick? Really? Morrighan: "Wow, it's so BIG." Aabria (instantly regretting what she just did): "STOP IT!!!"

Dorian is SPACED right now, compared to the others, he has NO IDEA what's going on ... winged boots ENGAGE!!! A last little toot ... Bardic Inspiration to Fy'ra! Yeah! And he flies up to Opal and just tries to give her a BIG HUG ... O.O Really? And she just picks him up and drops him far away on the ground without ANY fuss ... oof ... oh, a Persuasion Check? Hmmmm ... oh yeah, that's STILL a Nat1 ...

That is SUCH a confusing mental conversation ...

Fy'ra takes this all VERY personal given what she's just had to go through with her sister ... yes girl, invoke the Wildmother! SHUSH, PHONE!!! Oh yeah ... yeah, the Wildmother WOULD be somewhat incommunicado right now ... ye3ah, it's just PAINFUL trying to communicate right now ...

Okay, she's going for the whip instead ... ooh, so she's trying to snatch Opal and pull her AWAY from Ted or the Spider Queen or whatever this is ... sdespite a lot of dice, that's still just SEVEN POINTS of damage ... oof ... that really just doesn't do ANYTHING ...

Anjali: "Do I FEEL the fick of gems as I move across it?" Aabria: "STOP!!!"

Okay, so clearly IT IS the Spider Queen, then ...

Wait ... what just happened to Ted? "Aevilux"? What? A BEACON?!!! Oh fuck, it IS a Luxon Beacon ... fuck ... those things are NEVER good ... fuck ... so just as Opal finally understands Ted and their connection that evil Spider-bitch DESTROYS that connection ... NO!!!

Ted attacks Morrighan ... 14 points of piercing damage from the Dark Blade? Hmmmm ...

Dariax is just CONFUSED ... as he WOULD BE ... Bless at 2nd Level? Okay, then ... oh yeah, he's just PANICKING ... and trying to scramble up the rock ... this will be interesting ... yeah, Dariax has NO sense of self-preservation ... yeah, OUCH ... and another Bardic Inspiration to Dorian ... that's adorable ...

You know what? We really needed this cuteness after last week ... :3

Opal casts DARKNESS?!!! On herself AND Ted? Fuck ... yeah, that's basically EVERYBODY, except for Fy'ra ... and the only person who can see in MAGICAL darkness is OPAL!!! Oh shitty fuck ... O.O

Aabria: "I need you to KILL THEM."

Anjali picks the worst time to pee and the others immediately rag on her for it ...

Cute little squirrel = scary extra spider ... hmmm ...

Oh, so the dicks are DANI'S FAULT? I see ...

Cyrus can't see anything ... so he just starts shouting at his brother asking what to do ... this is a VERY odd exchange ... whoa, so he's STILL a Level 6? Aabria: "He's a himbo! He wouldn't have learned anything!"

Wisdom save shenanigans! XD

Morrighan tries to hop to Fy'ra in the total darkness ... acrobatics check ... oh, MIsty Step? Yeah, that's better ... oh, but not so much while she's blind ... hmmm ... yeah, we're really not sure WHAT to do now ... O.O 8? Off ... so she gives HERSELF 5 points of damage asshe lands EXACTLY where she meant to ... yeah ... Lay On Hands for Fy'ra? Nice ... 34 points back? Sweet ... and now she's stabbing the spider ... okay ... oh GRAB the dick of gems? Yeah, do that ...

The gems are memories and feelings of Opan herself? Okay, DEFINITELY protect these, then ...

Flashback? In the middle of the fight? Interesting ...

THat's really adorable in a funny way ... :3

Whoa, so Morrighan PERMANENTLY saved and protected THAT specific memory and connection to Opal? Oh my gods that's fantastic ...

Oh yeah. "Bossy Genasi" just fits her SO WELL ...

Dorian fishes out his mandolin and casts Dispel Magic on the Darkness ... PLEASE pass the rolls, Robbie ... 9? SHITE!!! Essentially he just fart instead and it blows him backwards a little ... so he drops down to where he THINKS Dariax is ... Acrobatics check? NICE roll this time ... got him! And he returns the Bardic Inspiration right back ... :3

Fy'ra scoops up more gems while trying to check in with the Wildmother again ... ah, dick jokes ... we're all children tonight ... XD ... ah, more flashbacks! Okay ... wow, Fy'ra really is BAD at positive physical contact ... Opal is immensely proud about knowing the word "absentia" ... ah, and she argues with Ted again, like always ... awwwww ... "rent-a-sister" ... too cute ... "Two coins together"? OH MY GODS!!! :3 And finally a challenge to the Spider Queen ...

She walks up the wall BECAUSE SHE CAN and surveys the scene ... hmmmm ...

LEGENDARY ACTION?!!! EXCUSE ME?!!!

Eldritch Blast? Fuck ... and of course SHE KNOWS who the biggest threat is ... SHIT ... wait, DARIAX?!!! Fuck ... O.O And all three HIT ... OH BOY ... 28 points of damage ... AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! Wait, up to 38 points? NOOOO ...

Oh Dariax ... that was SO BAD and yet SO FUNNY ...

Ted takes a swing at both Dariax AND Dorian ... and hits, of course ... oof ...

Dariax casts another Bless, then Quickens a spell to cast Dimension Door, grabs Dorian's arm and jumps them both onto the top of the rock. Going entirely by guess ... hmmm ... but Ted is a MAGE SLAYER? What the ever-loving FUCK?!!! Meanwhile they have to first land well but also NOT crush any dick-gems ... oof ... roll well, Matthew! O.O And THANK FUCK they JUST make it ... Dariax pulls a FULL-ON Van Damme splits landing ...

ANOTHER flashback! Dariax has a special night-piss? That's adorable in a real himbo way ... yeah, that's a little unsettling, Opal ... oh my gods, I love how Dariax is perceptive enough to KNOW he's not smart, but also really magnanimous with his acceptance of her failed attempt to flatter him ... whoa ... she CORRUPTS the memory? You evil spider-bitch ... oh, this just got SO CRUEL ... and now SUPER FUCKING SCARY ... whoa ...

Oh fuck ... Spider Goddess is trying to convince Opal to make them LEAVE HER ... that's so much worse ...

So now the spiders are DESTORYING the gems ... oh man ... KILL THAT FUCKER, Cyrus! And now he's poisoned! Fuck!

Aimee has to make another Wisdom savw with a TWENTY diffiulty? Fuck ... and she rolls 13 ... AAAARGH!!! Oh, now THEY ALL have to do that ... oof ... so Dorian and Dariax tank that ... ouch ...

They're losing her ... oh fuck ... fuck, so now Dariax thinks she's turned into a full-blown spider monster ... fuck ... and meanwhile Dorian sees EVERYONE has been overtaken by the horror affecting Opal ... even worse ...

OPal gets BIGGER, taller, stretched out ... and just NASTY ... oh yeah, Spider-bitch is DONE fucking around now ...

And she's calling it a night NOW?!!! Seriously? Ooof ...

So ... does this mean that THIS is how next week's starting? Is it gonna be the WHOLE episode, maybe? I can't say I'm AGAINST that, really ...

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