#chose the present emoji this month because all of these lovely fics are the best presents to all of us | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

reinerispretty · 3 years

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little moments. zuko x f!reader rotations bonus

HI UM!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 2K!!!!! i love each and every one of u with my WHOLE HEART!!!!

i was trying to think of something special to do that everyone would enjoy, so why not a good callback to the reason why most of us are here hehehe

when i wrote rotations, there were lots of avenues that i thought of taking after the fall of ba sing se! in the fic, (y/n) is arrested, and i posted a bonus already of how it would have ended if she had escaped with sokka and the rest of the gaang. HOWEVER, i did think of her taking azula up on her offer of going back to the fire nation and being there with zuko (insert side eye emoji)

so that’s what this is! a little rotations bonus to say thank you so much for sticking with me!!

She had contemplated it as she was in her room on the ship. Of running away and finding Sokka, Katara, and Toph. She would tell them that she couldn’t do it. She wasn’t strong enough.

The weight of what she had done settled into her stomach as soon as (Y/N) opened her eyes. She stared up at the ceiling of one of the guest bedrooms in the Earth King’s palace, needles dancing behind her eyes. For the first time in months, she was completely alone.

Azula had offered her immunity if she chose to join her. All would be forgiven if (Y/N) would just join them and return to her home, her real home. The mainland of the Fire Nation and the inner workings of palace life. It would be like nothing had changed. And (Y/N) had said yes.

It wasn’t as if she wanted to betray her friends. It was something that Sokka had discussed with her, in the event that she was captured.

A knock sounded against the heavy green door. (Y/N) sat up against the fluffy green pillows and called whoever it was in. Servants filtered in, carrying bundles of clothing, brushes, soaps, and dishes of water. One stopped at the foot of her bed. “The Princess has asked that you ready yourself to see her in the throne room.”

(Y/N) nodded silently and slipped out of the bed. The servants guided her to a chair in front of a vanity where they worked at her appearance.

Looking in the mirror was difficult. (Y/N) couldn’t bring herself to do it. Instead, as she was dressed in the traditional clothing of her nation, she kept her eyes cast downward and remained silent as the servants scrubbed the dirt from her nails and face and brushed the knots from her hair. It was as if, little by little, evidence of her time with Aang, Katara, Toph, and Sokka was being erased.

Sokka. She thought back to their conversation on the floor of their house in Ba Sing Se, shrouded in darkness as they whispered to each other. “Do what you can to keep yourself safe,” He had said quietly. “Pretend that you like them or something. When you can, meet back up with us and tell us about the Fire Lord’s plan.”

“I’m not leaving you guys,” She had scoffed, hoping that Sokka’s request of her was fake. Did he really expect her to leave her friends? The people who had become her family?

Sokka had turned over on his stomach to look at her. “You’re our best chance at gathering intel about the Fire Nation. They know you there, they trust you.”

“Not anymore,” She pointed out. Sokka shrugged.

“They have a soft spot for you. You’re one of our advantages, (Y/N). If given the opportunity, I need you to take it.”

She had turned over, staring straight into his sky blue eyes. She rested her chin on her palm. She wasn’t taking Sokka seriously, so she had humored him. “Fine,” She agreed. “If Azula wanders up to me and asks me to go back, I’ll play spy.”

Sokka’s face remained serious despite her joking tone. “I don’t want you to do this either,” He had told her. “If you get into any serious danger, just come back to m--us.”

(Y/N) had laughed. “Danger? In the Fire Nation? No way.”

In the present, (Y/N) dared to look at herself in the mirror. Her hair was done in the traditional Fire Nation topknot, flowing freely down her back. She looked as she had over a year ago. Beloved daughter of the Fire Nation with a miserable glint in her eye. Was this who she had always been? She swallowed thickly to press down the tears.

She had learned to trust Sokka’s judgment overtime. It was a good plan. She was the only one that could do it. But it hadn’t been a day and she already couldn’t wait to be reunited with her friends. In the meantime, she would have to do her best to pretend that this was the life she wanted. One of cruelty and submission.

She had sat in the palace the night before, as Zuko and Azula fought Katara and Aang in the caverns below the city. She had watched Appa fly away, with no knowledge of how her friends had fared during the fight.

Once she was done getting ready, (Y/N) dismissed the servants. She walked quietly to the throne room, her head down. When she entered, Azula was sat in the Earth King’s throne, still wearing her Earth Kingdom disguise. Mai and Ty Lee were seated at the steps beneath her. The one person she was expecting to see was absent.

Ty Lee’s face lit up when she saw (Y/N), and as soon as she finished her bow, the young acrobat cartwheeled over to her and gave her a hug. (Y/N’s) first instinct was to stiffen, but she fought it and squeezed Ty Lee as hard as she could.

“It’s so good to have you back!” Ty Lee exclaimed, clasping (Y/N’s) cheeks between her hands. “I’ve never seen your aura look better!”

“That’s...great?” (Y/N) questioned, furrowing her brows. Her eyes drifted over to Mai, who picked her nails with the blades of her darts.

“Hey.” Was all she said. Well, that was alright. Mai and (Y/N) had never been very close.

“Good morning,” Azula drawled, a smile curling on her lips. (Y/N) was unsure if it was genuine or menacing. Both were to be expected when dealing with Azula. “I’ve talked to Father. He’s willing to fully pardon you for your crimes.”

“That’s--” (Y/N) swallowed. “That’s very generous of the Fire Lord.”

“Yes. I told him all about the poison the Avatar and his friends put into your head. Without guidance from me, you were easily influenced.” Azula adjusted her position in the throne, tucking her legs beneath herself. She looked like she belonged there. “Father and I both agreed that it would be best if I kept you close. You need support from your real friends.”

(Y/N) knew what this was, and Azula did too. It was not something from the kindness of the young princess’s heart. It was a way to control (Y/N), to make sure that she wouldn’t stray. A single misstep and it was likely that she would be six feet under. It was even more likely that Azula would put her there herself.

(Y/N) tried as hard as she could to smile gratefully. “Thank you, Azula. Please give your father my thanks.” The doors to the throne room opened then, revealing Zuko. He was dressed in a royal Fire Nation robe, but his green Earth Kingdom clothes still poked out from beneath the red fabric. (Y/N) liked to think that she had become very vigilant in her time running from the Fire Nation, so she noticed the way Mai’s face lit up just slightly at his appearance.

He looked over at (Y/N), his eyes widening in surprise. He opened his mouth to speak, then immediately shut it. She stared back at him, her eyes boring into his. While it may appear that she and Zuko were on the same side, she had no intention of forgiving him for turning on Iroh. For throwing away all the progress he had made in his time away from the Fire Nation. He was so close to becoming the version of himself that she always believed he could be and he had thrown it all away for trivial acceptance.

Zuko was the first to turn away and (Y/N) looked back to Ty Lee.

“Can you tell me about the boy you were traveling with?” Ty Lee questioned. “The one with the ponytail?”

“Yes, (Y/N),” Azula said. “Do tell us all about your time with the Avatar and his friends. I’d like to know what they’re planning.”

“His name is Sokka,” (Y/N) told Ty Lee, trying her hardest to not show any amount of affection in her voice. “And I don’t know what they’re planning. They never trusted me enough to share.” She stared straight into Azula’s golden eyes. Azula was a skilled liar, but (Y/N) had grown up with her. She had a lot more tricks up her sleeve than the princess would anticipate.

Azula narrowed her fine eyebrows. “That’s quite alright. I suppose we don’t have much to worry about, considering Zuko killed the Avatar.”

(Y/N) had to hold in her gasp or else she would be jeopardizing everything she was here for. There was no way Aang could be gone. He was the connection between the Spirit World and the Human World. Wouldn’t they be able to feel it?

She curled her hands into fists, her nails pressing crescent shaped marks into her skin. “You should be thanking him,” Said Azula. (Y/N’s) eyes slid across the room to Zuko. He stared at his sister, his own brow furrowed in confusion. “Go on. Say thank you.”

“Thank you,” (Y/N) said quietly to Zuko. She hated how silent he was being. If Aang was gone, then Zuko would now be dead to her. He had done something unforgivable. If he didn’t understand the weight of his actions now, then he never would.

“Our ship leaves tonight,” Azula announced, standing up and stretching her body. “We should be back home by morning. (Y/N), you’ll be staying in the palace with Zuzu and I, since your parents failed to protect you from the Avatar.”

“Thank you,” (Y/N) repeated, perhaps because her brain couldn’t think of anything else.

“Father also wants to have an audience with you,” Azula said as she skipped down the steps. She strode over to (Y/N), the same mischievous glint in her eye. “Something about loyalty.” Azula’s smile was menacing.

(Y/N) swallowed. She was in way over her head.

---

Their ship docked in the royal port, just below the palace. Guards escorted (Y/N) off of the ship, which was horribly embarrassing. Truly they couldn’t think of her as that big of a threat to require guards? Perhaps they had thought she might try to escape. She had contemplated it as she was in her room on the ship. Of running away and finding Sokka, Katara, and Toph. She would tell them that she couldn’t do it. She wasn’t strong enough.

But as she lie awake that night, she thought of everything Aang had sacrificed in order to ensure that they would have a better life. If he was truly gone, it would a disservice to their entire cause if she couldn’t risk something the way her beloved friend had. It was intimidating, being surrounded by those she had fought for so long, but (Y/N) was different now. She wasn’t the girl that they thought they knew. Her time with her friends had changed her for the better.

So, (Y/N) stepped off the ship and back onto the Fire Nation mainland with her chin held high, a smirk playing at the corners of her lips. If she were to be believable, she had to exude confidence, even if she was scared out of her mind. Her confidence began to falter as the guards walked her past Zuko and Azula, past Mai and Ty Lee, and to the room that she remembered to be the Fire Lord’s throne room.

She had not set foot into this room since she was nine, when she had exhibited her firebending skills for Fire Lord Azulon. So much had changed since then. If she had thought Azulon was intimidating then, Ozai was something to be feared.

He sat on his throne, red flames shooting up in columns on either side. As soon as she was before him, the guards left, and (Y/N) fell into a bow. She absolutely despised groveling, but she knew it was what needed to be done in order to survive beneath the Fire Lord’s nose.

She tried her best to bring back all the information of Fire Nation etiquette that had gathered dust at the back of her mind. After a few moments of silence, she rose and sat on her knees, hands folded in her lap as she stared forward at Ozai. Her eyes were downcast, avoiding her gaze. (Y/N) tried her best to come across as shameful.

“You have grown since the last time you were in these halls,” The Fire Lord spoke. His voice was calm, too calm for someone who was talking to a traitor. (Y/N) inhaled a deep breath.

“My lord,” She said, her voice shaky from nerves. “I am so, so sorry for betraying our nation. I deserve to be thrown into prison and never let out.”

“Is that what you want?” Ozai questioned. “To be rotting in a cell?” (Y/N) curled her fingers into her dress and made a rash decision. She looked at the Fire Lord and stared directly into his amber eyes.

“I want to prove myself to the nation. And to you. I was a foolish girl. After Zuko’s banishment, I was heartbroken. I let my feelings get the better of me.” There was some truth to her lies. She wasn’t foolish, nor did she want to prove herself, but Zuko’s banishment had only been a catalyst for how she felt about the Fire Nation.

“I don’t give second chances.” (Y/N) felt a tugging at her heart. She couldn’t report to her friends from jail. Or if she was dead. “But perhaps you can redeem yourself after your punishment.” (Y/N’s) eyebrow quirked up curiously.

Ozai plucked a metal rod from his side and stood, walking down to meet her. (Y/N) knew what it was. Their words for ‘traitor’ were cast into iron at the end of the rod, which was already heating up from Ozai’s touch. The brand was given to those who had betrayed the nation, so that all would know of their treachery. They considered it to be a better option that rotting in jail or being executed.

(Y/N) gulped. She had never seen a branding performed, but she had heard the screams as Ursa had ushered her, Azula, and Zuko away from the palace when they were young. It was a practice that not even Azulon had instituted. It was purely of Ozai’s crafting.

“Your arm,” Ozai said, gesturing to her right arm. (Y/N) pulled up her sleeve. She could feel her body getting hot, the fight or flight instincts kicking in and begging her to run. As a native to the Fire Nation and a firebender, she was able to withstand a great amount of heat. Which meant that the poker needed to be thousands of degrees hotter than the average in order to brand her skin. “This is a punishment for your own actions,” Ozai sneered. “You brought this upon yourself.”

The hot poker pressed into the skin of her forearm and (Y/N) had to bite down as hard as she possibly could on her bottom lip to keep herself from shouting, but it was no use. The pain was unbearable, shooting up her arm and reverberating on every nerve within her body. She couldn’t control her shrill screams as they echoed in the massive hall. Hot tears streamed down her face as she watched what Ozai was doing to her. She should have escaped when she had the chance, should have told Sokka no, she couldn’t return to the Fire Nation. She had been a child then, she wouldn’t be safe from the horrors that Ozai inflicted on others.

He removed the iron from her skin and (Y/N) collapsed in on herself, her body shaking with sobs. She knew that showing weakness was even more dangerous now than ever before, but this was a treatment that was reserved for seasoned war criminals, not fifteen year old girls. She looked up at Ozai through cloudy eyes, barely able to see through her tears. “Thank you, my lord,” She said, her voice shaky and small because her throat was clouded with sobs.

“You are dismissed,” He said as he returned to his position on his throne, not bothering to look back at her. (Y/N) stood on wobbly legs and bowed once more before walking slowly out of the throne room. As soon as she was beyond its doors, she started running. She couldn’t even see where she was going, but her feet carried her to the only place she knew would help.

She sobbed heavily as she reached the turtle duck pond, dropping to her knees and shoving her arm into the cool water. The turtle ducks quacked and flapped away from her, but (Y/N) couldn’t care. She wanted Katara, whose healing powers would ease the burning pain shooting up and down her arm. She wanted to be held, to be reassured that everything would be alright. She cried, her tears dripping into the pond water. It probably wasn’t the most sanitary situation, but the coolness of the water helped ease her pain just slightly.

“(Y/N)?” Zuko’s voice sounded far away in her ears. “What happened?”

(Y/N) couldn’t bring herself to look any farther up than his boots. She felt so tired, but she couldn’t afford to pass out. She couldn’t let her guard down once while in this place. “Just go away,” She said meekly, the fingers on her other hand clawing into the soft grass.

“Father gave her her punishment,” Azula said from the other side of (Y/N). Having the both of them here was the absolute last thing she wanted. Azula pulled her arm from the pond and wrapped cool towels around her burn. (Y/N) hissed in pain, but she had to admit that it was better than the pond water. “If it makes you feel any better,” continued Azula nonchalantly. “You passed his test.”

“You knew about this?” Zuko demanded, his eyes wild with anger. Azula scoffed.

“Relax, Zuzu. It’s just a little burn.” Delirious, (Y/N) laughed bitterly. Her ragged breathing was starting to even out.

Zuko bent down at her side, placing a hand on her shoulder. (Y/N) shrugged it off and stood, refusing to look at him. She wiped the tears from her eyes and removed the towels from her arm. ‘Traitor’ was beginning to blister on her skin. It would be something that remained with her for the rest of her life.

She looked up at Azula. “Can you take me to my room?”

“You should probably go to the infirmary,” Zuko suggested.

“Zuko, I heard that Mai was looking for you,” Azula’s voice was laced with spite that stung both Zuko and (Y/N). Azula linked her arm with (Y/N’s) good one and led her back into the palace.

“Father said it was necessary for you to understand the damage you’ve done,” Azula said lowly to (Y/N). “You weren’t only a nuisance to me, you know. The whole Fire Nation was ashamed of you.” Azula giggled. She had a way of making jokes out of insults, but once she saw (Y/N’s) face, her own softened. “It will heal.”

“Will there be more tests to prove my willingness?” (Y/N) questioned. “If they’re worse than this, I don’t know if I’ll survive.”

“That’s all Father had planned for you.” (Y/N) noticed how Azula failed to mention if she had any tests for her. With a deep sigh, (Y/N) hoped that her friends were better off than she was.

---

A nurse had visited (Y/N’s) room to tend to her wound. The expression on her face had been a mixture of disgust and pity. (Y/N) hadn’t had the energy to leave her bed for a few days, which she recognized was putting her mission in jeopardy. She was supposed to be gathering information, not wallowing beneath the blankets.

After the nurse had dressed her bandages, (Y/N) decided it was best to finally roam about the palace. There was still a stinging sensation on her skin whenever it rubbed against the fabric of her dress, but she tried her best to ignore it as she walked through the halls of the Royal Palace, as well as memory lane. The place had become considerably more focused on Ozai rather than the greatness of the Fire Nation. Servants scampered about in fear, careful not to cross her path. She didn’t recognize anyone that she saw. (Y/N) used to know everyone by name. She guessed that they had either fled the palace or had been fired. Or worse.

Being there felt like being out of place in your own home. Thinking back on her past felt like looking into someone else’s life.

She paused at the tapestries of the Fire Lords, staring up at Ozai’s looming figure. He looked the most menacing, and perhaps that was because he was the most dangerous. There was only a month until the Day of the Black Sun, but that seemed like such a short amount of time to figure out how to defeat Ozai.

“It’s different,” Zuko said at her side, and (Y/N) jumped in surprise, clutching a hand to her heart. “Being back here after so long,” He elaborated.

(Y/N) hummed. If she were being honest, she avoided Zuko as much as she could. She felt as though she couldn’t stand to be around him. If she were alone with him for too long, she might end up beating him senseless.

“Why did you come back?” Zuko questioned. “I thought you were happy with them.”

“I guess we both don’t know each other as well as we thought,” (Y/N) said, keeping her voice as level as possible. She looked at Zuko, her face devoid of emotion. “I’m not here for you.”

Zuko frowned. “I didn’t think you were.”

“Good.” She turned to walk away, but Zuko grabbed her by the sleeve of her robes.

“If you’re here, why are you mad at me? You’ve forgiven everyone else.”

“You killed my friend,” She said quietly. “How could I ever forgive you for doing that?”

“That wasn’t--” Zuko huffed, lowering his voice. “I didn’t kill Aang. Azula used her lightning on him.”

(Y/N) narrowed her eyes. “How do I know you’re telling the truth?”

“You would trust Azula over me?”

“You of all people should know that you can’t trust anyone here.” She crossed her arms over one another, wincing at the contact of her wound. “Why would Azula lie?”

“Azula always lies,” Zuko said, repeating the mantra they had created when they were kids. “Why would it matter to you what happened in the underground city? You left them. You betrayed them.” (Y/N) flinched.

“And you feel so confident after abandoning your uncle?” Zuko’s eyes sparked with anger. After all this time, at least she knew exactly what buttons to push. “I cared about them,” She said, choosing her words very carefully. “I spent months with them, it was impossible not to. If they had killed you, I would be feeling the same way.” (Y/N) swallowed. “But they wouldn’t have. They’re different from you and me.”

She left him then, her heart pounding against her chest. Part of her wished that she could reach out to Zuko, to make him see all the wrong that their nation was causing the world, but she knew it would be too dangerous. Zuko’s loyalties lay with his family and Mai now. He might have been (Y/N’s) once, but he was no longer.

---

“Are you really going to stay under that umbrella the whole time?” Ty Lee pouted, grabbing (Y/N) by the arm. “The whole point of going to the beach is to get some sun!”

(Y/N) poked her feet from beneath the umbrella, wiggling her toes in the warm sand. She pointed at them. “They’re getting sun.” Ty Lee sighed, retreating back to her towel on the beach, where dozens of boys were already waiting for her. (Y/N) adjusted on her own beach chair, wrapping her shawl tightly around her shoulders. The words etched into her arm would be a dead giveaway to the children of Fire Nation aristocracy that littered Ember Island. It would cause more trouble than it was worth.

“I’m surprised you’re not running into the water,” Mai said in her monotonous voice. “I thought you loved to swim.”

“Yeah, I’d just rather not draw attention to the ugly branding on my arm,” (Y/N) said offhandedly, digging into her beach bag for a pack of fire flakes. She offered some to Mai, who took a few and shook them into her palm. The girls ate together quietly.

“It’s better than getting sent to Boiling Rock,” Mai said and (Y/N) snorted.

“That’s what I keep telling myself, but it didn’t feel like it in the moment.” Mai’s dark eyes glanced at (Y/N’s) arm, ‘traitor’ slightly visible beneath the sheerness of her shawl.

“I didn’t think they were actually going to do it,” Mai admitted. “Azula begged her dad not to execute you.”

(Y/N) coughed from surprise and also from the heat of the fire flakes. “Well, I’m glad to hear I was saved from a worse fate.” Zuko returned then, taking a seat between Mai and (Y/N). He handed his girlfriend ice cream, which promptly fell on her lap.

She hadn’t been on Ember Island for many summers, but things rarely changed on the tourist destination. Her family used to have a house on the opposite side of the island. She wondered who occupied it now.

Azula squatted at (Y/N’s) other side. “We’ve been invited to a party,” She announced, a triumphant smile on her face. (Y/N) sighed.

“I don’t really think I’m up for a party,” She said, and Azula’s fingers wrapped around her arm, pressing into the healing skin.

“Please? You have to come!” Azula demanded, but her smile seemed genuine. (Y/N) coughed.

“Azula? My arm.” Azula lifted her hands immediately, giving her a look that was almost apologetic.

“You have to come,” Azula repeated. “I already told them to expect the five of us.”

So (Y/N) was forced to attend a Fire Nation party. If the children of these diplomats had annoyed her as kids, she couldn’t stand them as teenagers. (Y/N) kept to the wall, preferring to people watch and nibble on the stacked plate she had snagged from the food table. She had traded her shawl for a long-sleeved shirt that had been buried in the back of Lo and Li’s closet. It was definitely old fashioned, but (Y/N) didn’t really care.

As she watched, (Y/N) thought of how she had never actually been to a party. Growing up, there were certain obligations and expectations that she needed to uphold. Being betrothed to Zuko meant taking lessons and maintaining appearances. She had gone to an all girl’s school for a short amount of time before being pulled out of her lessons to be tutored at the palace. Really, her entire childhood had consisted of Zuko, Azula, and other adults.

“Hey, how’s it going?” One boy asked, walking up to her and leaning against the wall. (Y/N) jumped in surprise, nearly spilling her food. When did she get so jumpy? Perhaps it was a side effect of constantly being on edge.

“Uh, hi,” She said, unsure why this boy was talking to her. Is this what happened at parties? People just walked up to other people without formal introductions? She felt so lame.

“I’m Lee,” He said, and (Y/N) snorted, because the Fire Nation had a million Lee’s and Zuko had been one of them. Her eyes cut over to the prince, who stood brooding in a corner as he watched his girlfriend.

“Sorry,” (Y/N) apologized, turning back to the boy. “I have so many friends named Lee. I’m (Y/N).” She took a bite of a carrot to punctuate her sentence.

“Is this your first time on the island?” Lee asked, resting his back against the wall as she had. His eyes were a nice light brown, his hair black and shoulder-length and tied half up in the back. He was likely a whole foot taller than (Y/N).

She shook her head. “I used to come here all the time when I was a kid. But y’know, life gets in the way so I haven’t been back in a few years.”

“So where are you from?” He had a lot of questions.

“The mainland,” (Y/N) answered. She wanted to be honest, as keeping up lies tended to be difficult, but she didn’t want to tell him that she was currently living at the palace. “And you?”

“I’m from a smaller island off the coast of the mainland. My dad’s the mayor there.”

“Oh, that’s nice.” (Y/N) realized she had a hard time talking to boys that she didn’t know almost everything about. She set her empty plate in the trash can and extended her hand to him, watching carefully so that her sleeves would not roll up. “Do you want to dance?”

“Dance?” He questioned. (Y/N) smiled.

“There’s music and an empty floor. That implies dancing.”

“I don’t think--” She grabbed him by the hand anyway, leading him to the middle of the floor.

“My grandfather taught me this one,” She told him, and she started dancing. It was another lie. Aang had taught her the traditional Fire Nation dances from his childhood, one night while their group was camped by a river bank and feeling incredibly bored. She had had no idea that her culture had once had a history of anything other than war, but learning the dance moves had excited her.

“Like this?” Lee asked, repeating her movements. (Y/N) nodded her head excitedly.

“Exactly!” She looked around the room and locked eyes with Ty Lee, who was always willing to have a fun time. She gestured for her to join her and once Ty Lee ran to the middle, other boys started flocking to the center to dance with them.

For a while, (Y/N) forgot about her mission and the friends she had left behind. Later, this would make her sad. But for right now, she felt like a regular girl in the Fire Nation.

Lee had pulled her close and spun her around so fast that she had been practically thrown from the crowd of dancers, spinning around the room until she eventually bumped into someone. (Y/N) laughed out an apology as the person gripped her forearms to steady her balance. When she looked up, she stared straight at Zuko.

She had allowed herself to stare, for a few seconds. The last time they had been this close, he had been preparing for his Agni Kai. The pink and red skin of his scar might have been off-putting to some, but (Y/N) thought he looked as lovely as the first day she had met him. She wanted to reach her hand up and touch him, to feel the contrast between soft cheek and rough scar tissue, but as soon as she had that thought, she pushed it away.

“Sorry,” She repeated as she separated herself from Zuko. The mood was ruined. She remembered everything that he had done, everything that she had left behind, and soon she went back to her spot on the wall, watching as the others danced happily.

---

They had left the party, but really they had been thrown out. Zuko had been jealous of boys talking to Mai, so they had broken up, but then Zuko had started a fight? (Y/N) wasn’t necessarily sure what had happened. One moment she was moving back toward the snack table, the next Azula was pulling her out of the house by her collar.

They sat on the beach now, surrounding the fire that (Y/N) had started. She remained quiet as they listed their qualms with each other, and with the universe. Her eyes remained focused on the flames as she processed the information and thought of any way that Sokka might be able to use it against them. But then a pit settled in her stomach. These were personal things that they were sharing, and it didn’t seem right to expose them so viciously.

“You’re just going to be quiet?” Zuko demanded, his voice rough and laced with annoyance. Her eyes snapped toward him, a frown placing itself upon her features.

“We’re all sharing,” Ty Lee said gently from her right. “Even Azula shared something.” (Y/N’s) eyes cut to Azula, who looked at her expectantly.

“I think I’m alright.” She didn’t want to risk exposing herself. She wasn’t even sure what was safe to say. These were her childhood friends, but who knew what would happen if she revealed even a fraction of how she really felt.

“Do you think you’re too good for us?” Zuko questioned, staring down at her. His voice was hard, laced with attitude as it normally was, but he seemed curious. “You spend time with the Avatar and his buddies and now you’re stuck with second rate friends?”

“I chose to come back,” (Y/N) narrowed her eyes at Zuko.

“It feels like you picked second best,” Azula said. (Y/N) locked eyes with her from across the fire. “We’re not idiots, we know you enjoyed your time with them. If you hadn’t, you wouldn’t have abandoned the life you had.”

“You all seem to forget that the life I had wasn’t the life that I wanted,” (Y/N) said, staring at each of the people that surrounded her. “I was sent away from the only home I had ever known, from the only people that I had ever known, to live in an Earth Kingdom colony. My father thought I was a disappointment and my mother hated everything I did, and the people that I thought cared about me left me behind without a second thought.” She paused, turning to Zuko. “Did any of you even think about me? Even bother to consider how I might have felt? You’re all so concerned with your own lives, you always have been. I was alone. I might have made mistakes, but that’s what happens when you’re desperate for someone to care about you.”

She firebended into the dying flames, causing them to shoot toward the sky.

“Why come back then?” Mai asked.

(Y/N) hesitated for a split second, but it was just long enough for Zuko to notice. “People fighting against the Fire Nation aren’t always eager to have someone from the Fire Nation with them.” She shrugged. “I just wanted to belong somewhere.”

Ty Lee scrambled over to her, wrapping her arms around (Y/N). “You belong with us!” (Y/N) insisted. “We never wanted to fight you. We would always feel so horrible about it after.”

(Y/N) gave her a light smile. “I would, too.” She risked casting a glance over at Azula, who refused to meet her eyes. (Y/N) couldn’t tell if she had messed everything up or if she was still in the clear.

They let the fire die eventually, and one by one, each of the teenagers began returning to the house, until (Y/N) was the last one left. She had moved further down the beach where the tide splashed against the sand. It was a warm summer night on Ember Island, and the water was just right. The only light surrounding her was the light of the full moon, which cast a lovely silver glow on everything.

“Hi, Yue,” She sighed, splashing her fingers into the water. “I wish there was a way that you could tell me they were okay.”

She heard shuffling from behind her and turned around, surprised to see Zuko walking toward her. She turned back, facing the water once more. “I’ll be back to the house in a few minutes, I just wanted to sit for a while.”

He sat in the sand, just a foot away from her. (Y/N) held in her sigh. Zuko was the last person she wanted sitting with her right now. She wanted to hate him for everything that he had done, but then she looked at him and all she wanted to do was talk to him. The inner conflict that he gave her was enough to put her in a sour mood for hours.

“I didn’t know where you were,” Zuko said quietly. (Y/N) turned to him and furrowed her brows. “No one would tell me.” His eyes met hers. “Or else I would have written.”

“Oh,” (Y/N) said, feeling her cheeks become hot. “It was years ago. It doesn’t really matter anymore.”

“If it didn’t matter to you, you wouldn’t have said it.” Sometimes it hit (Y/N) that just as she knew the inner workings of Zuko, her knew her as well. “I meant it, when I said that I thought of you every day.”

“I meant what I said too,” (Y/N) said quietly. “But things are different now. You’re Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation, not Lee from the tea shop.”

“I’m still who I was in Ba Sing Se.” She shook her head.

“You think that, but we both know what being back here really means.” Being back in the Fire Nation meant Zuko had reverted back to who he once was, someone eager to please his father, no matter the cost.

Zuko was quiet, as if he didn’t know what to say. She was surprised with how calm he was being. Perhaps the full moon had an odd effect on everyone.

“Can I ask you something?” (Y/N) questioned, and Zuko nodded. “Was Azula really the one to kill Aang?”

He hesitated, but then he nodded. “He was in his Avatar State and she struck him with lightning.”

(Y/N) pushed back the tears that threatened to spill over. Even with Zuko, she couldn’t truly show herself. “Why’d she tell everyone it was you?”

“To get me in my father’s good graces.” He scoffed. “To save herself in case it didn’t work.”

“What do you mean?”

“When Katara and I were trapped in the caves, she told me that she had water from the Spirit World pool in the Northern Water Tribe.” Zuko shook his head. “I-I don’t know what could have happened, but there’s something telling me that no one really knows what happened to Aang.”

That gave (Y/N) all the hope that she needed. Aang was safe. He was alright.

“So, if Aang is alive and your father thinks you failed...” She did not want to finish her sentence. She met Zuko’s golden eyes once more. “After everything he’s done, why did you come back?”

“Same reason as you, I guess. I wanted to feel like I belonged somewhere.”

She had never considered that Zuko had been feeling alone during his time with Iroh. She had been conflicted over her loyalties, but it had only lasted a few moments until she made the choice to join Team Avatar. She was confident that she was doing the right thing, but there was more at stake for Zuko.

“You didn’t swim today,” he said suddenly.

(Y/N) shrugged. “I didn’t want anyone to see my arm,” She said simply, but Zuko winced.

“I...I didn’t know he was going to do that. If I had, I would’ve--” (Y/N) shook her head to stop him.

“We both know firsthand what he’s capable of. I wouldn’t have wanted you to put yourself in a position like that.” She touched her arm, where beneath the fabric of her sleeve lay the raised marks of the brand that was still healing. “Who knows, maybe I’ll be laughing about it in a few years.”

Zuko glanced at the water, then back to (Y/N). “Do you want to go swimming?”

(Y/N) opened her mouth to protest, but Zuko didn’t seem to be having it. “You love swimming.” And it was true, she did love to swim. She had spent hours in the water during their trips to this island as children. Her mother had had to practically drag her from the beach.

(Y/N) stood and removed her top layer of clothes, revealing the bathing suit beneath. Without hesitating, she ran into the warm water, diving beneath the calm waves. When she resurfaced, Zuko was only a few paces away from her, the robe that he had been wearing left in a pile beside her own clothes on the beach.

“The water’s colder than I remember,” Zuko called out to her, just as she dove beneath the waves once more.

“It was definitely like this when we were young, we were just stubborn,” (Y/N) laughed. Zuko swam over to her. She stood on her toes as the water came to her shoulders, but it only reached Zuko’s chest. “Your hair is still dry,” She pointed out and Zuko rolled his eyes, plugging his nose and dipping beneath the surface for a few seconds. When he came back up, he was significantly closer to (Y/N) than he had been before.

“Is that better?” He asked, shaking out his hair so water droplets splashed on her face. She laughed and shoved him backward to get him to stop.

He staggered backwards and grabbed her by the arm, pulling her under with him. (Y/N) opened her eyes beneath the waves, feeling the familiar stinging sensation that had been a staple of her childhood. Zuko’s eyes were closed as he held his breath. He had never gotten used to opening his eyes underwater, it had seemed.

(Y/N) pulled them up toward the surface, both inhaling a sharp breath of air. As she went to settle on her feet, she bobbed beneath the waves. They had traveled much farther from the shore than she had expected.

Zuko reached out for her, wrapping his arm around her middle to keep her above the water. He could still stand, which (Y/N) hated. “The last time we swam here, I was taller than you,” (Y/N) said, staring up at him. He smiled down at her, the corner of his eyes crinkling. The skin of his scar tried to repeat the action of its counterpart, but it couldn’t quite do it.

(Y/N) couldn’t keep her eyes off of his scar. She knew it wasn’t entirely polite, but she was curious. He had left the Fire Nation before it had healed. When they encountered each other, she was never very close to him. Even at the party, she had only seen it up close for a few seconds.

“I’ve never seen it this close,” She told him, her voice as soft as the moonlight that surrounded them. Zuko’s cheeks flushed.

“It’s pretty bad, huh?” His eyes were trained on her, but she wasn’t noticing. She furrowed her brows and shook her head.

“I like it,” She said simply. It was Zuko’s turn to furrow his brows.

“You can’t be serious.” (Y/N) shrugged, lifting her right hand to touch his cheek like she had wanted to at the party. Zuko stiffened and nearly dropped her into the ocean. Her thumb, light as a feather, traced over the pink and red skin. Some areas felt smooth and silky, while others were rougher. She traced over the brow bone where his eyebrow had once been.

His eyes fell to her forearm, where his father’s punishment was still healing on her skin. He wrapped his fingers around her arm, lightly tracing the word with his own thumb.

“For the record,” He said, eyes still focused on her arm. “I don’t think you’re a traitor.”

A few moments passed before he looked up at her again. Her eyes were soft, sparkling in the reflection of the moonlight that bounced off of the water. The corners of her lips were turned upward in a soft smile. Her hand remained cupping the side of the face and Zuko sighed, leaning into her touch.

“You’re really beautiful,” She told him, stroking his scar once more. “I don’t think I ever told you that.” Her heart was beating so hard against her chest. This was the stupid power that Zuko had over her. She had been so mad at him just a few hours ago, but if she allowed it, he wormed his way back into her heart.

Zuko’s eyes widened in surprise at her statement. He parted his lips to say something, but no words would come to mind. She dizzied him, jumbled his thoughts until he was a mess of unspoken words and dumbfounded faces.

It was slow as it happened, thoughtful. He rested his forehead against hers, their noses just barely touching as he stared at her through half-lidded eyes. He would give her time. If she wanted to pull away, she would.

She didn’t. Her other hand took its place on his bicep, fingers curling gently into his skin. Her lips parted, her lashes batting upward as she stared into his amber eyes. Zuko was all that she could see and feel. Her heart continued to pound against her chest. If he wanted to do something, he would.

Zuko’s eyes fluttered shut as he closed the distance between them, capturing her lips in a kiss. They were softer than he had ever imagined. The little gasp she let out made him pull her closer. He didn’t want any space between them. His hand left its place at her arm and traveled up to where she caressed his cheek, wrapping his fingers around her palm.

(Y/N’s) eyes had remained open for a split second before she closed them, pressing into Zuko as she kissed back. She was completely thoughtless. Everything else in the world was absent as she melted into him, the hand at his arm moving to the back of his neck to pull him toward her even more. She had thought of this moment many times, but nothing could compare to the warmth that encompassed her heart as she kissed Zuko.

When they pulled apart for air, it was as if (Y/N) had been pulled back into the real world. She stared at Zuko, her eyes wide as she realized what they had just done.

“Mai,” They said at the same time, horrified looks reaching both of their faces. (Y/N) hated herself. She had gotten caught up in the moment and taken something that didn’t belong to her. (Y/N) scrambled out of Zuko’s arms.

“We don’t speak of this ever again,” She told him, her voice stern. Zuko nodded silently. “This was a mistake. That’s all it was.” With that, she dove into the waves, swimming as fast as she could back to the shore.

---

She avoided Zuko during the rest of their time at Ember Island, and once they had returned to the palace as well. If they ended up in the same corridor, one of them would turn around and walk back from where they had come from. It made (Y/N’s) heart ache, but she knew it was for the best. She felt horrible for doing something like that to Mai. She didn’t know what had become of her, and now she didn’t trust herself to be around Zuko at all.

So, she focused on her mission. Every little snippet that she heard walking through the hallways would be recorded on a scroll, which would then be kept on her person at all times. She had witnessed on more than one occassion Azula leaving her room and looking particularly pleased with herself. (Y/N) would never leave anything incriminating lying around.

Still, she needed to figure out how to get a message to Sokka. The palace had messenger hawks, but she needed to know where to send one and she had absolutely no idea where her friends were. The Day of the Black Sun was the next day. To (Y/N), it seemed as though her best bet would be to leave the mainland quickly and rendezvous with one of the groups they had recruited for the invasion. If she could steal one of the palace’s boats, she could row herself to one of the islands off the coast and either find someone she knew or find someone who knew how to get a message out.

Guards were not posted outside of her doors during the day, so (Y/N) made a hasty knapsack from one of her robes and began shoving a few belongings in it. Bread she had sneaked from the kitchens, a piece of parchment and a pen, and a map all fit securely inside. She was packing it once more when her door opened suddenly and she yelped, scrambling to cover her belongings with her bedsheets.

“I need to tell you something,” Zuko said as he shut the door behind her. (Y/N) felt her face heat up.

“You can’t be in here!” She hissed, reaching forward to shove Zuko out of her room. The last thing she needed was Azula seeing them alone together. She would undoubtedly tell Mai, which would cause more problems than (Y/N) needed on her last day in the Fire Nation.

“Just wait a second!” Zuko demanded, keeping his voice low. “I just got out of one of my father’s war meetings. They’re planning to burn down the towns of those who haven’t surrendered yet.”

(Y/N) halted her movements of trying to get him out of her room. She eyed him warily. “What does that have to do with me?”

“I know you’ve been working with the Avatar.” (Y/N’s) body stiffened, but she rolled her eyes.

“This again. Zuko, I already told you--”

“You don’t have to lie to me anymore. I know that’s the real reason you’re here is to get information for your friends. I can’t let my father or Azula do this. I want to help you.”

(Y/N) narrowed her eyes. “How do you know?”

“I know you wouldn’t come back unless you had a really good reason. As soon as I heard you say that they were suspicious of you, I knew that was a lie. I saw how you guys were with each other. They care about you.”

(Y/N) swallowed. In a whisper, she said, “I’m leaving tonight. I can tell them about this before--”

“The invasion,” Zuko finished. “My father and Azula know about that, too.”

(Y/N) felt as if the wind had been knocked out of her. Everything that they had been working so hard for would be for nothing. She had to get to her friends and let them know they had been exposed. “I need to leave now.” She moved to go back to her knapsack, but Zuko grabbed her by the arm.

“They’re suspicious of you, too. If they catch you, it’ll be much worse than a burn.”

“I can’t just stay here and watch my friends fail!”

“I have a plan,” Zuko assured her. “You just have to trust me.”

(Y/N) eyed him. His hand still held her arm. Zuko stared up at her. She had never seen him look so sincere. With a deep breath, she nodded.

---

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pffbts · 5 years

Note

hobi x y/n just sitting down and journaling together, whether it be digital journaling, pen to paper journaling, and filming a journal with me video together. ( this really is just for me to feed the y/n college life that I can only dream of)(tbh,its really hard to imagine hobi journaling, so maybe have him just looking at me journals?? looking at my old journals maybe instead of writing his own?? or maybe even being a brat and going off on how it doesn't help him and he thinks that its weird)

(cont.) + and like, continuing what i just wrote, maybe he’s reading my old journals and talking about the past me vs the present me??? ( I’m just giving u ideas I swear I’m not trying to direct u onto writing like a commission or some ish) 🙇🏻‍♀️

GENRE. fluff; angst (minimal)

CHARACTERS. jung hoseok x reader | no supporting character.

W.C. 2K

AUTHOR`S NOTE. this is, at the end became a really cosy fic. i, though planned to write something energetically―maybe it`s because i was listening to this while writing, i ended up making a peaceful fic. anyway, thanks for sending in your idea, baby! and happy reading, bub!

LIYAN`S VERSION | the one who requested.

[10:44 AM] [and, there will only remain the words we wrote.]

―beads of perspiration gather up across your forehead sticking your baby hairs against it in that annoying way as ever. but you had to finish your laundry, so you lift your laundry basket up in both of your arms and walked further away from your apartment and towards the destination.

hoseok had exactly ten minutes left before he arrives at your place from his quick visit at the dance academy but while on his way towards your place, he couldn`t pin out what came over his mind, he dropped by a stationery shop to buy some stickers because he knows you love them but you also love it the best when he buys them for you as a complimentary gift.

though his ways of telling you are very little and like flash before your eyes, you`re always quick enough to catch up on it. after all, you had your own ways of knowing him.

you witness the flush of the water inside the machine and the cup of coffee that you held in your hand remain tightly captured in your palm. you`ve always been a nervous wreck whenever you hold something in your hand. it`s strange how this might look really ridiculous to others but for you, this is the one thing you`re scared of and that`s letting go.

you feel the constant tapping of your feet and as you look at the clock on the wall and the spins of the machine simultaneously your mind goes back to that one place your person lives. you understand that you can`t wait to reach to him.

as you hear the sudden alarm of your laundry being finished, you jump from your seat, flipping the now empty cup in the bin next to you. crouching down in front of the machine, you pull out the washed clothes and settle them rather messily in the laundry basket. there`s a rush in your system and you could almost feel it reaching the tip of your fingers now. you watch the slight tremble of your fingers but chose to quickly rub it off you head.

no one knows apart from you that it`s been five months and finally you were having hoseok over at your place. when you had offered to visit him at his dance academy, he said not to worry about that and offered himself to come over at your place.

you smile at the casual remembrance and walk out of the laundry shop, your arms now filled with energy.

hoseok, who has another set of keys jiggling happily in his jean`s pockets, took them out ever so carefully and used it to open the door of your apartment but was met with a sudden empty air when he realizes that you`re currently not at home. his eyes quickly shift to the brand new neatly white painted chair and table you had bought two weeks ago. you had sent him the pictures the moment you settled them in their current place, right at the front of the biggest window of your apartment.

he walks forward, taking out the stickers he bought while on his way here. some days he would end up buying a whole month`s supply of stickers for you and that someday somehow ended up becoming today. he knows already that you`re probably going to scold him as usual but that`s not the biggest issue here. he was getting worried where you would be at this hour. it is disgustingly hot outside and he hoped you`re wearing light clothes.

while he kept himself worried, he decides to revert his attention on the occupants of the neatly coloured table. the top of the table doesn`t look much neat in his eyes but it looks kind of aesthetic which hoseok didn`t complain about. he knows you`re a little messy so he keeps himself casual and doesn`t bring up his own neat freak from inside. he settles himself in the chair and picks up the journal that was closest to his reach.

seeing from a far, anyone can tell how much that table said about the owner herself. the flowers are fresh as usual, which means the owner changes it every day. the lampstand is clean as a white cream, the pencils, the pens, the markers, the highlighters, the thin ribbons, the gum stick, the whitener and last but not the least the still stocked stickers. each and everything was sitting in their designated place. if anyone wanted to know if the owner has a person close to her or not, they can look at the photo collage stand where polaroids of her and her person`s smiling faces are prominently visible. their happy moments are captured in time and though the time has frozen in that particular picture, the feelings inside those two humans grow with abundant depth.

it dawns upon hoseok how much he has missed you. when he traces the edge of the journal with his fingers, he dies to feel a little bit of your warmth against his own too. without another thought, he opens up the journal to the page you last wrote:

[sunflower sticker] day 152 / time: 07:23 AM―first of all, today we`re going to use only sunflowers and if i run out of sunflowers we`ll use the sun because today hobi is coming back after five months!!! i missed him a lot [sad emoji] and i`m so happy that today he`s finally coming over. i don`t know why but i`ve a feeling that he`ll probably buy a bunch of stickers again. the weather seems better today. it`s been less gloomy and too much sunny. i hope it doesn`t become too hot later on. [three extra sun stickers]

[ten sun + two sunflowers stickers] time: 10:30 AM―TOO MUCH HOTNESS and i`ve too many laundries to do. ugh, [angry emoji] why didn`t i notice that i was piling up so much, maybe college was too stressful this week (?). it`s almost time and he`ll be here and i don`t want to get a nag from him because of how much messy and lazy i become when he isn`t here. anyway, it`s getting late. i should probably get down to business.

so you must be at the laundry right now―

as hoseok`s realization dawns upon him, he hears the sound of the entrance door opening. he gets up immediately and pushes back the chair in its place.

“aaahhh for a second, i thought i didn`t lock the door!” you exclaim, putting down the laundry basket in the rack beside the washroom, “also―”

without realizing what happened in front of your eyes, you feel trapped inside the warm encasement of hoseok`s arms and chest pressing right against you. you try squinting your eyes open and your eyelashes were met with the slightly moist strands of hoseok`s hair. your fingers move to softly caress them. so, he`s really been growing his hair out. you feel him giving you soft pressed kisses against your neck and as you crane your neck a little to give him that extra access, he pulls his face away only to lean in and give you a kiss on your mouth. it`s like you had the fastest shift in your moods and you weren`t complaining in any way.

“hobi―” you try speaking only to be cut off as he gives another kiss at the corner of your lips, “no talking.”

“but―” he pulls you against him much more tightly before you could finish your second attempt at talking. right that moment you realize that you`re completely wrapped in his arms, he had completely captured you in the nest and you had no other way out but to finally return the gaze he has upon you.

“i saw you were reading my journal.” you say and almost thanked the heavens for not letting him stop your mid-start.

he nods his head slowly and pushes out his lower lip humming at you, “you were all sunflowers and suns today. care to give out the reason?”

“i was planning to but then i thought i will let you figure it out.” you shake your head with disapproval.

“oh, but baby i already got it.” and when he smiled like that, you felt like your heart collapse from the insides of your ribs and ended up at the pit of your intestines. your felt your neck heating up while you tried wiggling out of his grip.

this time, hoseok did let you out of his embrace and followed you as you sat down to write down the next update of your day`s whereabouts. as your hand reached for the pen, you saw a sandpaper bag sitting there when it wasn’t there this morning. you lift your head up to catch the anticipation filled eyes of hoseok.

“i―” i always tell you not to do this, you almost said your usual sentence but because you are seeing him after a long time and because of your inner anxiety for people and things leaving you behind didn`t work out on hoseok, you decided to vocally appreciate his effort of at least remembering your likes. “i`m glad you always do this for me,” you tangle your fingers with his slim ones, his veins providing the smooth crests and troughs against your skin and before hoseok see through your mind, you take his hand and lay them across your cheek, closing your eyes for a moment taking in that familiar sense of protection and warmth from him. “i`m glad you`re here again. i missed you a lot.”

when hoseok leans in and holds your face against his stomach, he caresses the top of your head.

“i missed you a lot too. i couldn`t wait to come back home and see you doing things you love, saying things that are on your mind, eating things you crave for, and mostly, i missed reading your daily journals. i missed living in your world.”

later that afternoon, while you were lying down on your futon beside the table and reading the newly bought book after a heavy lunch date with hoseok, you watched him sitting at your place in the chair and with a heavily concentrated face he was taking one sticker out at once and pasting them on the sides of your writings, sometimes he was taking the markers to draw little lilies and sunflowers, sometimes he added little messages like reply here and there in-between your lines.

and, you, more than concentrating on the contents of the book in your hand or the interactions in-between the characters were mostly invested in observing the wonders that hoseok`s hands did and you were sure you felt tingles inside your chest when you saw him smiling that satisfied smile whenever he was happy with his input. his hair which has been growing out a lot faster these days gave him a casual and carefree look. his extremely loose white tee and his tightly fitted jeans gave him such a beautiful look, you thought how can a person look this ethereal without even giving any effort. also, the descending sunlight that covered the place where he sat. the fading sun illuminated and made his smile into a bigger picture.

you sigh and he catches that giving you smiling eyes before going back to doing what he was into. you stretch out your legs further and finally looked back at your opened book and dived in with the smell of happiness lingering in the air around you.

fin.

▶RULES. ▶ REQUESTS/QUESTIONS. ASK BOX

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petersshirts · 5 years

Text

Valentine | Bucky Barnes

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

summary: got nothing but love for you, fall more in love everyday

warnings: like one swear word but other than that, pure fluff!

words: 1,5 k of heart emojis

a/n: this is for @uglypastels 1K writing challenge, congrats on hitting that milestone!! i chose the song Valentine by 5SOS, my favourite band :) i’m deep down into learning for exams at Uni right now, and there are no ideas or motivations for a fic left, but I tried my best and I hope you like this!! please leave me feedback, i appreciate it!!

Bucky had never been fond of Valentines Day.

Back in the 1940s, he loved to take girls out and go dance, but actually, spend more time with them than a month? No way. He would get bored way too easily by their lives and never managed to hold up a long-term relationship. And that’s why he never bothered with Valentines Day. He didn’t know the feeling of loving someone and being loved, so he just acted like it was any normal day while the couples around him went on candle-light dinners and romantic getaways.

But there was one thing he promised himself - that if he would ever find true love, that he would treat his girl like it was Valentines Day every day. The girl should be loved every day and not just get special treatment on this particular day.

But when Bucky turned into the Winter Soldier and it seemed to him like there was no good ending for him, he completely forgot about women altogether and his self-made promise. Because who would love a fucked up mess like him? His brain was damaged and there was not one night without a nightmare that caused him to lay awake than rather go back to his haunting dreams full of him killing innocent people, their pleading still echoing in his mind.

But when you came along, everything changed. He changed.

It had been one year after his rehab in Wakanda ended and he was back in New York as a full-time Avenger, fighting by Steves’ side. It was the first time in the last fifty years that Bucky felt alive and safe to be around people, to be around his friends. And when he looked into your eyes for the first time, it felt like his world shifted. Like he was the moon, spinning around you, his earth.

It was the first slight touch when you handed him his coffee, the one you had mistakenly taken from the barista. Bucky knew that you were in a rush, your eyes rushing from side to side, your breath going quickly. „I’m so sorry,“ you mumbled when you gave him the black coffee, but the Winter Soldier just smiled and gave the coffee back to you.

„Take it, you’re more in a rush than me.“ You just thanked him, your fast heartbeat echoing in Buckys’ ear, wishing that he could hear it every second of his day.

When he saw you again, a week later, he gathered his courage and asked you out, earning a bright smile and a nod from you. And after that, he was gone for you. You were the person he had been looking for; Bucky just couldn’t stop listening to your voice and stories, completely in a trance whenever you told him something. This felt completely natural and he thanked the gods that he had been in this specific cafe on this specific time when he found you.

Time ran whenever you were together and there were more times that you slept at the compound, never wanting to go home alone without his warm arms. After two months of being together, Bucky was in love. You were everything he wanted and he couldn’t even imagine how lonely his life had been without you in it. Whenever he had some free time, he was with you. You were inseparable and when he finally told you that he loved you with his entire heart, you couldn’t stop kissing him, cuddling him and just holding him close.

He was the lost puzzle piece you had always searched for. Months passed by quickly until February came up and with that, Valentines Day. And Bucky being so caught up with you and his job, he nearly forgot about it until Steve called him out.

„So what are you gonna get your girl for Valentines?“ Bucky looked at his friend, confusion written over his face. They sat in the Quinjet together, on their way back home, back to you. „Uhm, nothing?“ He still wasn’t that impressed with Valentines Day because he gave you everything every day. Whenever he could, he would bring you little presents from all over the world, or just a few flowers that he had picked up on the way to your apartment. But when Steve looked at him with a strange look, he felt bad. Yes, he had promised himself to treat you like a Queen and he did, but for everyone, this day seemed so special. And he was pretty sure that you felt the same way.

So he sent you a message, asking you if you were free on the 14th and you said yes without hesitation. Valentines Day had never been that big in your life either but when Bucky asked you on a date for that night, you couldn’t say no. He was giving you everything you needed and there was nothing more you wanted.

After you told him that you had time, he tried to find something romantic that he wanted to do with you, but there was just nothing coming to his mind. Everything he thought about was something he had already done. There was nothing that was so special and you noticed right away that something was different.

„Babe?“ You softly nudged your lovers’ leg to get his attention. It was another night at the compound, you working on some work while Bucky was just staring at the wall, seeming like he was deep in thought. Normally, he would hug you from behind and watch your hands wander over the keys of your laptop, fascinated by your fast typing. But today, he was completely lost in his own thoughts and you were worried.

„Hm?“ Bucky looked up at you, a small smile on his lips. „What’s wrong?“ You entangled his hand with yours and softly stroker your thumb over the back of his hand, trying to find out what was going in this mind of his. „N-nothing,“ he mumbled and stared at his hands, getting you to worry even more. This was definitely not the Bucky you knew and loved. You nudged his shoulder to make him look up at you. „Come on, you can tell me everything, you know that.“

Bucky sighed, not sure if he should tell you that he was struggling to find something for Valentines Day. No gesture was somehow big enough and he felt stupid because you knew how much he loved you. He showed you that every day but Steves’ words were still branded into his mind and he couldn’t stop thinking about finding the perfect date idea. But when you looked at him that way, he couldn’t lie to you and not say anything. So him being completely gone for you, admitted the truth.

„Okay, so I’ve been trying to find the perfect date for Valentines Day and there’s just nothing coming to mind because we have so much fun every day and…“ But you interrupted him with a kiss, a purr slipping out of his throat when your lips moved against each other, slowly but passionate. You just kissed for a few minutes, lost in the moment until you finally pulled back with a big smile. The worry was not completely gone from Buckys’ face and you softly stroked his forehead to get rid of the wrinkles that had appeared from his thinking.

„You don’t need to do anything special, boo. You are everything I want and you’re always showing me how much you love me, I don’t need a special day to know that. You give me so much Bucky, you have no idea.“ Bucky blushed at your words and pulled you in a hug and sighed, knowing that the pressure was gone because you just knew him so well.

„I love you so much, doll,“ he whispered into your neck and left a little kiss there, reminding you that he would always be yours. You giggled, always touched by his cheesiness. „I love you too, you dork. So much.“ And with that, everything was good. With you, Bucky felt like there was nothing you two couldn’t do. Every problem could be solved, no matter how big or small.

And that’s how you found spend Valentines’ Day just like every single day. On the sofa of your apartment when you both finished work and dinner you cooked, lovely glances send between each other all the time. And when Bucky pulled you into the dark bedroom and whispered sweet nothings in your ear, telling and showing you how much he appreciated your body, you knew that he was the one.

With him, no minute of your day was boring and whenever you looked into his eyes, touched or kissed him, it felt like fireworks. With Bucky, every day was Valentines Day and you would never have it any other way.

Please let me know what you think!

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imaginekpoplikethis · 7 years

Text

7 Years - Final - BadBoy! Jeon Jungkook X Reader - Part 20

Oh my gosh. My heart was kind of aching when I was finishing this part and I've just realised it still is.

It's finished.

I wanted to make it as special as possible so I made it double the length it normally is. I hope you can forgive me for taking so long to post it.

And to @tokki-mon I am so sorry it took ages but I decided to save your suggestion until the very last part. I thought it would fit in so well. I hope you don't think I forgot and I hope this makes you happy too.

I sincerely hope you guys enjoyed reading this story because I know I enjoyed writing it. Thank you for staying with me throughout the process and I hope you continue to stay with me for my future fics.

I love you all so much, have a great day!

Don't be shy to drop a message or comment about anything whether it be about the ending of 7 years or just life in general because I'm always here to listen.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10.1 Part 10.2 Part 10.3 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 - Final - Here

"This is it. I can't believe it's finally the end." This was probably the third time Areum had brought up the fact that you were now at the end of your school life. You would have thought she would be too preoccupied with her sandwich to even speak but then again, she was temporarily moving away in a matter of a month. You had already promised yourself you would try your best to make her last weeks memorable though you weren't completely sure how.

Ji Hee piped up from beside you for the first time since the three of you had sat down. "I'm upset we didn't get to meet sooner Areum but I'm glad that we even had the chance to meet." Areum smiled sadly and nodded her head in agreement before tucking into her lunch, Ji Hee doing the same.

You glanced around the lunch hall in search of the boy you called your boyfriend though you already knew what the outcome would be. You hadn't seen Jungkook since your first lesson which wasn't unusual but you half expected him to at least stay for the whole day. Apparently you were expecting too much.

Both Areum and Ji Hee had finished eating by the time you switched your attention back to them and Ji Hee suddenly stood from her seat, apologising for leaving so soon. She explained that she had forgotten that Jae Hyun had wanted to meet her during lunch to which you quickly ushered her away, a smile on your face.

"Hey, let's get some fresh air. This is the last time we'll have a lunch break in school." Areum hopped off her seat and brushed away stray crumbs from her thighs before heading towards the exit with you in tow. You had ended up walking towards the back of the school building only to find a group of boys spray painting on the wall.

"What are you idiots doing now?" You stood directly behind them, arms crossed and Areum beside you, curiously peeking over their heads. The first to turn around was Taehyung, who immediately grinned at you and bounded towards you, encasing you in a warm hug. You had to stifle your laughter at the way Hoseok jumped out of his skin at the sound of your voice.

"Hey! What are you, a ninja? Why're you sneaking up like that, I almost peed myself." Yoongi stopped spraying the wall to pull down his face mask and give Hoseok a dirty look. "That's disgusting..."

Either Hoseok didn't hear Yoongi or he chose to ignore him. Taehyung shook you from side to side excitedly and began to push you towards the wall. "Look at this! We're leaving our mark here! Come closer Areum!" At his command, Areum drew closer and stood beside you once again, taking in the words spray painted onto the schools wall.

"'BTS are coming?' What's BTS?" Namjoon took a couple of steps back to appreciate their work before he glanced at you. "Bangtan Sonyeondan. It's what we're calling ourselves." Taehyung nodded energetically, still clinging onto you.

"That's kind of cool." Seokjin stood from his position and began to rub his hands on his trousers whilst making his way towards you. "Kind of? Hey! 'That's very cool and handsome.' That's what you should have said. Or at least 'Seokjin is very cool and Handsome.'" Rolling your eyes at his ego, a giggle escaped you and you ducked out of Taehyungs arms.

"That's what I meant to say. Anyway, lunch is almost over so I'll see you guys later." They each said goodbye and you headed back towards the main school building with Areum. "I'm going to miss catching them breaking rules."

You hummed in agreement with Areum as you both silently reminisced over the past year. The time had certainly flown by and with it so had your old attitude towards the people around you. If anyone were to ask you what you had thought of Jungkook and the boys at the beginning of the school year, you would have simply laughed in their faces and replied that you didn't think about them. It was amazing how now they were some of the most important people to you whom you thought of on a day to day basis.

The bell to signal the end of lunch dragged you out of your thoughts and you turned to Areum who joyfully hugged you. "I'll see you after school. We're still going to the café so don't think of cancelling. It's our last after school trip there." A pang of sadness settled in you before you pushed it to the side, grinning at Areum.

"Never would have thought of cancelling." You waved her off before heading to your own classroom, dreading the end of the day and your very last hours of school.

- Hours later, you found yourself sitting in the café that had been your hangout for the past two years, dwelling on all the good times you shared with Areum. "I'm glad we're having an official leaving party in three weeks. It's kind of postponed the feeling of actually leaving for good."

Nodding in silent agreement, your phone buzzing snatched your attention and you took a long sip from your frappé.

A message from none other than your boyfriend, Jeon Jungkook.

'Are you and Areum free today, two weeks from now?'

Once you had finished reading the message, you returned your attention back towards your bestfriend who was looking down at her own phone.

"Hey Areum, Kook wants to know if we're free two weeks from now." She blinked at you a couple of times before pretending to think about her answer.

"Well, I'm not really doing anything besides packing so yeah, I guess... why?" You shrugged your shoulders and asked Jungkook what he had in mind. All you received back was the side eyeing smirking emoji.

"He's being secretive, so lord knows. He could be taking us to our death." She choked on her drink and you immediately began patting her back, attempting to help her recover.

"Sorry..." Areum chuckled before coughing again whilst shaking her head. "I'm sure that's the last thing he would do. He loves you too much." Although you knew what Areum was saying was true, you could only scoff.

"I'm being serious, he puts you above mostly everything else."

You let a crack of a smile grave your lips. "Isn't that how it's supposed to be?"

"Wow, Seokjins ego is really rubbing off on you, you know that right? And don't pretend you don't do the same." You couldn't argue with her there. You knew you had your moments when you spoiled Jungkook just like how he spoiled you. In your defense, he was someone that you believed needed to be protected at all costs like Jimin and Taehyung or even Yoon-

Scratch that. Yoongi is more than capable of protecting himself.

"Yeah, I guess I've been hanging out with him too much." Areum smirked at your obvious avoidance to her last comment and you continued sipping your drink, trying to not make eye contact with her though it didn't really matter if you did or didn't.

She knew you were aware of that fact.

Two weeks came and went faster than you would have liked. What Jungkook had planned for both you and Areum still remained a slight mystery despite the fact he had unintentionally dropped a few hints. When the day had arrived, you found yourself being woken up at seven in the morning by the blaring sound of your ringtone. You blindly clawed at your desk, attempting to answer your phone as soon as possible. When you finally did manage to answer the call, your face immediately scrunched up in annoyance at the sound of Jungkook's smooth voice at the other end of the line.

"What do you want?"

"Well that's one way to greet your boyfriend in the morning..." Growing increasingly annoyed, you began rubbing your temple with one hand, the other clenching your phone tighter.

"Jungkook..." The warning tone you spoke his name with alerted him that he didn't have time to joke around and so he jumped straight to his point.

"We're all waiting outside. Get ready." Before you had a chance of questioning him, he hung up the phone and you forced yourself to leave the warm covers that lay on top of you. You took your time in getting ready and making yourself presentable which ended up taking about half an hour. You were sure that by now they were all getting restless which made you feel slightly bad.

Heading downstairs, you grabbed a piece of toast that your mother had left for you before turning to slip on your shoes. "Have fun with Jungkook and everyone."

"Thanks, I wil- wait... how did you kn-" The honking of a car interrupted you and you dashed out of your front door after bidding your family goodbye.

Outside were two cars, one of which you recognised as Namjoon's from your trip to the beach. The other was a pristine looking black Cadillac pickup truck. Another honk made you jump and you scowled at the driver of white convertible BMW, who turned out to be Jungkook.

"Hurry up Princess, what were you doing in there? Having a coronation party?" You flushed at his nickname for you and practically stomped towards the car. "I told you not to call me that."

He smirked at you and motioned for you to get in with his head. You climbed into the back seat beside Yoongi who gave you a small smile and a quick 'Good morning' which you returned.

"We're going to pick up Areum now." Making eye contact with Jungkook in the rear view mirror, you nodded your head before turning to greet Hoseok who was sat in the passenger seat beside him.

"Good morning! Wow, we're so lucky it's not raining today otherwise there would be no point in going to th-" All of a sudden, his seat jerked forward and it took you a couple of moments to register the fact that Yoongi had kicked the back of his seat with such force that he snapped back into place seconds after.

"Hey! Are you trying to kill me!? What if I didn't have a seatbelt on!?" The pure fear that was laced in his voice had you stifling your laughter and Yoongi making a sound of annoyance.

"Tch, stop exaggerating Hoseok. I wouldn't have killed you."

"When I woke you up the other day, the first thing you asked me is if I wanted to die..."

All was silent until you burst into a fit of laughter.

"What's so funny about Yoongi wanting to kill me!? I thought I was your favourite!" Your laughter grew louder until Jungkook decided to intervene.

"What makes you think you'd be her favourite over her own boyfriend? Does that make any sense to you?" Hoseok shot Jungkook an annoyed look which he chose to ignore.

"Maybe because I make her laugh more. Did that ever cross your mind?" Jungkook pulled up towards the front of Areums house before turning in his seat to face Hoseok.

"I make her laugh too, it's just when we're alone." Both you and Yoongi watched as they threw several points at each other for the next five minutes. Deciding now was the time to alert Areum that you were waiting for her, you whipped out your phone and messaged her.

"Why don't you just ask her you idiots." All eyes were on you and you slowly raised your head to meet the steady gazes of Hoseok and Jungkook.

"Hi...?"

"Well, who do you prefer? Me or Hoseok?" Yoongi scoffed at Jungkooks question but watched you from the corner of his eye, slightly curious of your answer.

It was fairly obvious what your answer would be, wasn't it?

"Jimin."

Hoseok choked on air and Jungkook pulled back, making an offended face. To your complete and utter shock, Yoongi chuckled, seemingly satisfied with your reply. You gaped at him for a few seconds, admiring his handsome smile before your eyes snapped back to Jungkook, who had recovered by then.

"Jimin!? Why!?" Hoseok's exclamation startled you and Yoongi kicked the back of his seat once again, causing him to yelp in surprise.

"Because he's so cute and small. Anything he does is done in a cute way." Jimin was someone who you could never imagine purposely causing trouble. However, you had no doubt in your mind that when it came down to it, he was capable of causing a dangerous amount of damage. You had seen him mildly annoyed and you hoped you would never see it again. It almost seemed like he was a completely different person what with the sudden change in character.

What were you talking about again?

"Everything Jimin does is cute? Sure, maybe when pigs fly." Before you could retort, the car door beside you opened and Areum climbed into the seat next to you.

"Good morning everyone." There was a chorus of greetings from the rest of you and Jungkook asked if you had all settled in to which he received a nod of confirmation from each of you.

"So I'm assuming that the rest of the guys are in the other car? Whose car was that anyway?"

"It's Seokjin's but Namjoon is driving it. He said he doesn't trust Seokjin to drive because he'll be too focused on looking at himself in the rear view mirror." You were sure Seokjin would prioritise the lives of his friends over his looks. Namjoon had to be overreacting. Or maybe Jungkook was the one over exaggerating the story.

"If you guys were that scared of being in a car alone with Seokjin you should have just left me in there. I could care less what he does as long as it doesn't require staying awake and witnessing both you and Hoseok argue." That was typical of Yoongi but you had to agree with him once again. You'd prefer not to be woken up this early in the morning on a non school day. "Honestly, same." Your reply brought a smirk to Yoongi's face and Hoseok huffed in annoyance. Areum blinked in slight confusion having come after the whole argument had taken place.

With that Jungkook pulled out of Areums driveway and set out to todays destination, wherever that may be.

Half an hour into your journey, Yoongi had succumbed to the drowsiness that seemed to always follow him and fell asleep on your shoulder. You didn't dare wake him due to the many stories you had heard of his temper. Instead, you decided to take a picture of this moment because never would you ever have thought that the scariest person you knew could have the most adorable sleeping face.

"Hey, send that to me after. I can use that later on." You pursed your lips at Hoseok whilst shaking your head. "And get killed by the Min Yoongi? No thanks, take your own picture." He seemed to heed your advice since within the next moments he pulled his phone out, stretching his arm out towards Yoongi's face. However, before he could take a picture, a hand shot up and grabbed his own hand, locking it in place. Your eyes trailed towards Yoongi's closed ones before glancing back at Hoseok's startled face.

"If you even think about pressing that fucking button, I'll kill you right here, right now." Hoseok slowly retracted his arm and turned to face the front, not making a sound. Yoongi, surprisingly, still hadn't opened his eyes but he did move his head from your shoulder to the head rest.

A few minutes later the silence that had ensued died away and you all broke into conversation, picking up where you had left off. This made the last half hour whiz by and Jungkook was soon parking at what seemingly was an abandoned parking lot.

"Where are we exactly?" Jungkook unbuckled his seatbelt and craned his neck in your direction, flashing that same bunny like grin he always had.

"One of our special hangouts. We come to this one a lot and just chill out for the day." He then stepped out of the car and everyone else followed suit. Just as he had locked the doors, Namjoon pulled up beside your small group and Taehyung bounced out of the car, jogging towards you.

"Good morning! You didn't miss me too much did you?" He winked at you whilst pointing finger guns. "I missed you tons, I almost died without your presence."

Taehyung's boxy grin grew more and he hugged you tightly. "You're the only one who understands me and my personality!"

"You said the same thing to me the other day!" Jungkook's offended voice made Taehyung pull back from you. Before he could answer, Jimin made his presence known.

"And me! You're playing all of us, aren't you Tae?" Taehyung began to visibly sweat and within the next few seconds took off behind a small building.

"It's my car, I should be able to drive it!"

"And kill us all? No."

Seokjin and Namjoon joined the rest of your group and Hoseok clapped his hands together. "Let's go!" He started in the direction Taehyung had disappeared in and you followed behind him.

You had all set up something close to a base at the side of the building, which you discovered to be an old bowling alley. After a few hours passed by of simply trading each of your own stories and eating the different foods Seokjin had prepared, a question popped into your head. "Are there still bowling balls and pins in there?"

Yoongi glanced back at the building for a moment before nodding his head at you. "There should still be some left from the last time we came here..."

"Let us bowl!" Seokjin jumped up from his seat and marched into the building and Taehyung all but skipped in after him. Jungkook made his way towards you, sticking his hand out and you grasped it, letting him pull you up. He didn't let you go but spun you around, very loosely wrapping an arm around the front of your neck and shoulders.

"Okay, now that was smooth." He nuzzled your cheek at your compliment before pecking it. "I know but that's just the beginning." From the corner of your eye you spotted his smirk but decided to ignore it.

You'll let him stay cocky just this once.

When you eventually caught up with the group, you found Seokjin wiping down one of the alleys with a mop whilst Namjoon collected the stray pins from the ground.

"Let's see who can get the cleanest strike first." Taehyung's proposal was one everyone seemed to be interested in and you all negotiated over the order you would play in.

"I'm just warning you, I beat the almighty golden maknae so you all better watch your backs." Areum decided to wipe the smug grin off your face with her next words.

"Well he must have let you win because I know for a fact that you missed almost every shot the last time we went bowling." Well, she wasn't exactly lying about that.

"That was two years ago! I thought you were my friend!?" She giggled and gave you an apologetic hug which you couldn't reject.

By the time you had released her, everyone was ready to start and you prepared yourself for what was probably going to be the most intense bowling game you would ever play.

Your first competition had resulted in Jungkook being the victor unsurprisingly but when you all decided to play a real game, you were shocked at the fact that Yoongi had single handedly beat you all by quite a bit. It didn't help that you played two more games only for Yoongi to come out victorious both times.

"I'm ninety nine percent sure that Yoongi has rigged this game." Your comment received a chuckle from said boy who then shook his head.

"Nope. I like to think I have been blessed with many skills and this just happens to be one of them."

"Bowling isn't a skill." His smile dropped at Taehyung's reply and he cast him a lazy stare.

"Do you want to die? Of course it is but I wouldn't expect you of all people to understand." They continued bickering and you glanced at the time displayed on your watch. Almost six in the evening.

Who knew that you could spend this long bowling? You did take hour long breaks in between so it shouldn't have been much of a surprise.

A tap on your shoulder pulled you out of your thoughts and Jungkook placed a finger on his lips, grabbing your hand and guiding you out of the building.

"What's up Kookie?" He pulled two spray cans, one white and one black, from his hoodie pocket and handed you the lighter of the two.

"Let's leave our mark here." You raised your eyebrow at his suggestion but couldn't deny that his idea did sound very appealing.

"Isn't that stereotypical? You know that whole 'leaving our names on a tree forever' thing?" He shook the can and grinned at you, stepping towards the other side of the building.

"Who said we were leaving our mark on a tree?"

Upon following Jungkook, you found him spraying his name onto the back of the building, in big bold letters. Once he was done he spun around and nodded his head at the wall.

"Your turn."

Staring at his name sprayed in black, you had a short mental debate with yourself which, honestly, was useless since there was almost nothing wrong with what you were doing. Stepping up to the wall, you spread your name in white beside his before adding a little heart in between both of your names.

"I thought you didn't like clichés?"

You looked up at him with a delicate smile and scratched your cheek.

"I guess a little cliché isn't that bad..." He returned your smile with one of his own and in that moment you were reminded that his soft smile was one of the many things you loved about him.

"So this is where you were hiding!" Jimin's voice made you spin on your heel and you were greeted with the sight of the rest of the group, all standing with their own spray cans, even Areum.

"Thought you could leave us out?" Taehyung jumped forward and tutted at the both of you before admiring your 'work'.

"Ah, this is cute. But... it's missing something." He proceeded to spray his own name above yours and motioned for everyone else to come forward. Your smile widened as everyone began to leave their names around Jungkook's and your own.

Minutes later, they one by one stepped back and Taehyung directed his next question at the both of you.

"What do you think?" On the once plain wall was an array of names each in their own unique colour and you felt a sense of pride in what you would describe as a masterpiece now.

"Perfect."

"Don't you think your name is too close to mine?" He began chuckling as did everyone else though Seokjin's window wiper laugh was undoubtedly the one that stuck out the most.

By the time the sun had set and night had just barely arrived, you had all settled around a fire Yoongi had lit. You sat beside Jungkook watching the flames of the fire dance whilst distantly listening to the jokes being thrown about. That is until Jungkook drew your attention away.

"Those seven years really flew by back then. I wish I had known to enjoy them while I could."

Jungkook lowered his voice to avoid interrupting the conversation taking place in front of you.

"Honestly, there are better years to come. You just wait on it."

You were sure that as long as you had these people beside you, there would only be better times.

There could only be better times.

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scummy-writes · 7 years

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Thoughts on the V Route! (Spoilers)

Full on disclaimer: This is purely my opinion on the route, and in no way am I trying to force my opinions onto anyone, or am I expecting people to agree fully. We all have different opinions and that's okay! Please don't harass me over any opinion stated in this, as I'm just sharing this for people who are interested and my intention is that and that only. Thanks! 💕

So, starting off, I cannot say I didn’t have a fun time with this route. I mean throughout the whole game, I was so excited for every chat, even if it dealt with characters I didn’t enjoy at all (Which was mainly just Rika, to be honest.)

I’m not going to lie though, while I like V, there were some things I was kind of disappointed in, but since V isn’t one of my super favorites, I don’t think it’s appropriate to say that the route is terrible because of some of the things I didn’t personally like.

But...I wanna open this up with more than just complaints!

I do wanna talk about what I enjoyed!

So seeing all of the characters before the canon main story was very fun! It was neat seeing how different they were two-ish years back. Jumin seemed to remain the same out of all of them (Still confused about the world outside of what he’s experienced, still a lovable dork in my opinion, still pretty level-headed and trying his best to joke).

Jaehee, through the whole route, seemed a lot more blunt than usual, and after I was secured on V’s route (aka getting to day 5 with no problem), I was very happy that I could throw a lot of hearts to her without an issue, haha! I missed being able to be sweet to her, and the cute (and tired) selfie we got was great!

Yoosung was very….Salty. Very much so, and there were times where, at first, it was a little annoying. Right off the bat he starts trying to convince you V is shady, and I can’t really blame him due to it being set just six months after Rika’s ‘death’, and how he was there with the interview with V and the police- That would make me a little suspicious as well….But, like usual, he kinda...blew up about it at first, but I got used to it, especially later on once he learns about what Rika had been doing and starts freaking out (along with all of the other members). I really Can’t blame him for that orz poor sweetie ;;; I think that would be such a huge shock knowing a close family member did such things. I’m glad he was able to get help, but also as the route went on, I felt so bad that he apparently never got therapy when he first learned about Rika’s ‘death’. :( And it was also sad when Jaehee seemed to recommend it from possible personal experience. I mean I’m glad she was able to get help, but hhhhh my babies ;;;; The fact that he apparently turned to drinking a lot when Rika ‘died’, and later on in the route, h u r t s orz

And contrary to popular belief, while Zen isn’t my favorite, I did have a fun time with him in this route except for when he was an asshole in situations that it wasn’t necessary. V getting hurt and needing a doctor is an example, and I thought it was uncalled for when Zen chose that time, of all times, to nag at Jumin for wanting to bring in his personal doctor. Another time is calling Yoosung a ten year old when Yoosung started to text MC during a big mental breakdown moment of his- Finding out this stuff with Rika. But...Besides that? He was pretty fucking funny. The whole thing about his computer was great, and I really did appreciate him helping Yoosung out, and showing more what their friendship is like. My only other issue was that, at first, there weren’t many options with him that I could choose that weren’t either A- Relentless flirting, or B- being a complete ass to him. Later on this got better though! I really like it when he’s not trying to flirt with you a lot.

Seven……..Was fucking great LOL. Lately I’ve been liking him more as a character! At first I was just kinda ‘meh’ with him, or had days where I just didn’t want to think about how he was kinda rude on his own route, but just seeing him in the chatroom was always great. At first he seemed a little...Hesitant? But later on it was just great seeing him interacting with everyone. The car-ride with Jaehee was great, and according to a friend, I apparently missed a very prime opportunity to call and hear him impersonate Jaehee LOL. I felt extremely bad for him later on, but...I’ll get to that later >>. Regardless, I enjoyed his goofiness and interactions! I especially loved when him and Vanderwood were able to interact. I honestly didn’t think Vanderwood would be in this, but it was great seeing him! (And realizing he wants to go by ‘Stark’ instead LMFAO). When Vanderwood took Seven’s phone and chatted with you- I can say I think that was one of my favorite chatrooms in the game. I laughed so much and just had a fun time talking to him!

For V...

While I highly enjoyed each chat, a lot of phone calls, and some of the scenarios we were presented with, I have to say overall that this route sorta lowered my opinion of V ;;; There were many moments I enjoyed, don’t get me wrong! I loved finally getting to talk to him on the phone, how kind he was with the player, and just seeing how V really acts. In the main route, we never got to see him much...So every chatroom with him and Jumin were great, and I loved being able to learn more about his past (and good god I love his mom a lot? I wasn’t expecting that ajfbsdbhf). I Also loved the chat with V and Zen, talking about when Zen got into that motorcycle accident? It was nice hearing that Zen didn’t really seem super bothered (??) about the fact that V was...stalking him. It was weird, but I suppose it’s because it led to Zen still being alive to this day ajkbfsh

There were a lot of moments in the game that I loved, and so I was really hyped for what his route was going to bring! I was hoping my worries were going to be answered, but it started going downhill quickly for me when he straight up lied to Seven about Saeran being the hacker. Like, I was all “Okay, well… Maybe it’s because adding even more stress into a stressful situation isn’t ideal right now…?” But...It just rubbed me the wrong way, and as the plot progressed and Saeran killed himself- It’s never shown with V telling Seven about who the hacker really was?? He got away with never giving Saeran a chance to be saved from that horrible situation, which could have been solved if he just told Seven. Hell ;;; I wouldn’t even have minded if V told Seven, and the outcome was still the same. It would mean he was at least trying to help Saeran.

Because of that, and because of how much I love Saeran, that...Really made me not like V as much anymore. I could handle him wanting to hide things from the RFA members- He’s a victim of abuse, he wouldn’t want to hurt them especially when it came into terms of how horrible Rika had turned out to be. But he had several chances to tell Seven about Saeran, even if it was just “The hacker is Saeran-” Because Seven would have damned well tried to rush into Mint Eye a lot sooner than Saeran had a chance to kill himself. I...Can’t really think of any ways to forgive him for that. That’s a huge mistake to make, and where it led just makes it harder to say I like V after this.

I think I still prefer a V that is outside of this route, and based off of stories and fics I read before this route ;;;

Since we’re on the topic of Saeran, I cannot express enough how much I love him waaaah ;;; The whole Ray/Saeran bit gets me confused. I can’t tell if ‘Ray’ is how he really acts (which doesn’t make a lot of sense), if he has BPD (Which I guess is plausible but I don’t know anything about the disorder to be okay with saying he has that), or if the possible multiple personality is a side effect of the elixir? I honestly cannot tell. I know that probably makes me look insanely stupid, but BPD is something I’ve never looked into, and the few times I’ve seen it portrayed in various media, there’s always been a huge fuss over how its portrayed wrongly (like a lot of other mental health issues are).

Besides that, I loved every interaction with Saeran/Ray ;;;; I loved the calls, the messages, and it was always so difficult trying to purposely be mean to him. Orz Saeran is a heavy bias for me, so I loved all the content we got with him in this route. Him liking plants, researching flower meanings, the small details about everything he went through as a child (besides it being vague), the fuckcing emojis… I l ov ed. When day 10 happened, I died so much inside. I’m almost tempted to try writing a few fics (that are not….smut) dealing with Saeran and those moments. My fucking heart hurts too much ;;;;

I could gush about him for a while, so I’m going to take a hard lean to move onto trying to talk about my thoughts with the plot now, and then try to wrap this up! I’ve been trying to write this out for the past few days and failing miserably due to work.

I fully went into this game expecting this to be an AU (I mean...it is, right?), that a lot of the new details we learn about the characters are still canon, but it’s an AU because this wasn’t how they originally wanted the game to play out. (Does this make sense?) So, Zen having an old computer and being a doof when it comes to technology, Yoosung never getting therapy and drinking to deal with his feelings of Rika’s death, Jumin…………….being the same showing more interest in the supernatural, Jaehee being fully trusted as being the head of an intelligence unit- etc etc, all of that can be taken as canon!….Right?

(T_T I’ve never tried explaining it, but I’m sure you guys understand what I mean by that!)

Anyway, keeping that in mind and how this is nearly two years before we meet the gang in a more mature-er state (cough Yoosung cough), it was fun finding out more details about the characters that I didn’t expect, or having personal/friend HC’s confirmed!

Besides learning about the characters, we did get to learn more about Mint Eye, which I was thankful for. It was nice seeing how it worked, that they DID have a cleansing process (but apparently only needed to use it twice within the first six months?), what sort of ranking Saeran had, and how Rika was regarded. It seemed pretty big at six months, and I think Rika herself says that it’s been since months since they’ve moved into the building, so it does sort of raise questions again, such as was she getting people into her cult for a while before her ‘death’, the funds she got for it (I’m guessing possibly V’s money? Her parents, adopted or not, didn’t seem to care much about her at all), and so on. Also, since it seemed like there were so many members after the first few months, it’s scary thinking about how big it got after two years.

And god, did we learn so much about Rika. On one hand, it’s nice seeing more of her backstory, her (delusional) reasoning for making a cult and brainwashing a child and many other adults. I really wanted answers, even if it was through some unpleasantness with Rika herself, and I got some of mine answered. I was thankful we could say no to her, as a lot of her actions and some of her excuses for her behavior reminded me of two very horrible people in my life, and it tremendously hurt seeing how much she had Saeran wrapped around her finger. I’ve heard some rumors about what the bad ends are (please don’t tell me!) and if they are true, it means there’s a chance a few sad hcs I had aren’t too far from the reality of the game. Which...Doesn’t make me a happy camper orz But regardless, their relationship worried me a lot, even if we knew he was really ready to do anything for her. Just seeing it just- shudder.

I also actually enjoyed the game showing that mindless devotion towards a partner doesn’t really solve...Everything. I don’t see that often! It was nice, especially since it was showing how they both messed up in the relationship (very much one messed up a shitton more than the other, with stabbing and dropping treatment, b ut it was nice seeing it nonetheless).

With the plot, even if it could be seen as cheesy or generic, the only time I really felt it was strange was in V’s endings. The Normal ending was didn’t wrap up a lot of things, which you would expect from just a small ending (it was cute, though!!), but the Good ending didn’t really answer my more pressing questions that I had, and the one thing I was annoyingly upset about didn’t get resolved at all, so that kind of bummed me out. I think if you’re a huge fan of V, though, the ending would be good for you! Just the way the wrapped up the route was weird, but since the afterend isn’t out, there’s still a chance of some of my questions being answered in that department!

I’m trying to think of some things that really struck a negative cord in me, but besides what I’ve said, I’ve still really enjoyed this route. I’m upset about Saeran, of course, since he was a bigger fave than V for me, but... It’s not unusual for cults to have members commit suicide. I was moreso expecting a mass suicide, instead of Saeran having to blow up the building and just letting himself die in there rather than escaping like the plan seemed to have been, but...Saeran didn’t have anyone. He didn’t have us, Rika had left and was obsessing more obviously over V, and Mint Eye was in shambles and he was told to blow it up to get rid of the evidence surrounding it. I just really wish V told Seven. c h r i s t.

Regardless, I did enjoy this route. I can’t wait to worm my way through the bad ends, replay it for things I possibly missed before, and to hopefully crank out a few fics for it! Haha, I already have one in my drafts! I wish I could think of some more things to say, but off the top of my head these are just my general thoughts on the route!

Please keep in mind: This is purely my opinion on the route, and in no way am I trying to force my opinions onto anyone, or am I expecting people to agree fully. We all have different opinions and that's okay! Please don't harass me over any opinion stated in this, as I'm just sharing this for people who are interested and my intention is that and that only. Thanks! 💕

#scum talks #new route spoilers

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life-love-and-alcohol · 7 years

Text

Don’t throw this dog a bone (Victuuri one-shot)

yet another fic no one asked for...I have a request to answer and this is all I can bring myself to write (for the lovely anon who requested fluff+makkachin...this may kind of suit your needs...but I promise to do something better and more specific for you within these days!)

MORE UNDER THE CUT

(if you are on mobile, here’s the ao3 link)

Yuuri let the waiter guide him through the restaurant, taking in the fancy decorations and marveling at every small detail. He didn't even bother to consider the tables inside, since it was a beautiful Friday night and they were right next to the shore. So he timidly pointed at a little table for two outside on the patio, surrounded by the hum of the river and people's light chattering.

He hanged his coat on the backrest and sat down, telling the waiter he was waiting for someone else when he was offered to see the menu, and thanking him for his gentleness as he watched him leave to attend other tables.

Taking a look at his watch, he made sure he had arrived on time. In fact, he had arrived a bit early. His nerves and his excitement were to blame, to be honest. It had been ages since he had had a proper date, and no matter how many times he reached to loosen the knot on his tie, it would still feel way too tight.

The waiter came back to leave a little basket with bread and butter in front of him. Should he take a bite? No he shouldn't, he was on a diet. The candle seemed to be too close to the basket, so he moved in just in case. In reality, he just needed to move his hands and release some tension. He sighed, drumming his fingers on the table, and taking in the sight of the busy restaurant as a distraction.

The place looked fairly expensive, elegant, and for a moment he wondered if he had enough money to pay. He had made sure to grab more than usual just in case it was too fancy, but he hadn't count on the fairy lights, the wonderful view of the river and the refined crockery staring holes into his wallet.

He felt a drop of sweat running down his forehead, and he slyly took a napkin to wipe it as he stared at his reflection on the window next to him. His hair was still on point, slicked back with gel, but he fixed it a little more obsessively. That lilac shirt looked good on him, at least that's what Phichit had said when he pushed him out of the apartment that night. "You look great!" he had reassured him, with quite a hard pat on the back "You'll leave him breathless!". Yuuri doubted he would give his date an asthma attack, but he really wanted to cause a good impression.

After all, the man had never seen him outside the office, outside his overly-stressed, sweaty persona, with that dull working outfit and the glasses. This was his chance, the chance to prove him he had a life outside the paperwork and his desk.

Maybe, it was also the time to prove it to himself, too.

Just when he was about to take a culprit hand to the bread basket, he felt something touching his feet and turned to see a brown dog sniffing his shoes. He smiled, wanting to pet the curly head, but a loud whistle coming from another table interrupted them.

"Makka, come here" the poodle immediately responded to the call, walking towards a table where a young man sat alone "Don't bother other people"

Yuuri wanted to say that it was ok, that he really liked dogs, but then he realized he didn't want his date to arrive and find him all covered in fur.

The man stared at him funnily, arching a brow, and Yuuri looked away. There weren't many people around, just a group of girls that seemed to be celebrating a birthday, some elderly couples, and the man with the dog. Of course there weren't families with kids, it wasn't a family restaurant. And the place was way too quiet for someone who ate constantly at McDonalds.

He checked the time again, his feet beginning to tap involuntarily as he saw it was nine o'clock already. His date should be about to arrive.

He was happy, very hopeful about that night. Not only because he had been drooling over his co-worker for months already, but also because it had been ages since the last time he had been out of his house for some reason other than his job. If he wasn't in the office, he was at home, studying. Phichit insisted it wasn't healthy, and that he was going to start putting on weight again if he didn't move. But he wasn't eating much, either. He wasn't really hungry when he came back from work, and the only lunches he had were the ones in the lies he told Phichit.

He didn't like lying to him, he was his best friend, not to say the only one, and he was worried about him. But he already had enough with his complaints about his social life to add even more drama about his lack of appetite, and he didn't want him to worry. Phichit had a life of his own, after all. And he had to take care of it.

As he watched the group of friends singing happy birthday on a distant table, he couldn't help but remember his parents' gift when he turned twenty.

He and Phichit had been considering leaving their small, humble town in the search for better opportunities, but paying for the stay in a larger city until he got a proper job in there was a huge amount of money. And his parents had surprised him by saving and gifting him every penny to their name, and he was finally able to move out.

He smiled, remembering the moment, staring at one of the elderly couples at the distant tables.

He missed his parents. And his sister. And his dog. He missed his family like crazy. As well as his hometown, the people he used to know, the streets he used to walk… From one day to another, he was suddenly miles away and all he had been able to take with him was his best friend. Which he was extremely thankful for, since Phichit was his anchor to sanity.

But still, he hadn't been ready to give his back to the life he had been so used to. And, unlike Phichit, he wasn't very good at dealing with changes.

“Sir, do you want to see the menu yet?”

“Oh, no, sorry. I’ll wait a little longer”

“Alright, sir”

He took a hand to the basket, taking a small piece of bread. Just a little wouldn’t do any harm. The waiter turned to take the order of the man with the dog, and Yuuri tried to read his lips out of mere boredom but he had never been good at it. What he did read, though, was the title of the novel between his hands. Stoner, by John Williams, it read. He didn’t know the book, but he found himself wondering what it was about.

He felt his phone buzzing in his pocket and he almost jumps off his chair. With rapid, desperate fingers he checked his notifications, but he turned off the screen and left it aside on the table as he saw it was just Phichit. He breathed in, trying to soothe his ridiculous nerves, and sitting down properly and elegantly against the backrest.

His friend just probably wanted to check on him, to know if he was having a good time. Mainly because he cared, but also because he was unhealthily nosy. It had been him who convinced him of asking his co-worker out on a date, after all. Being as shy as he was, all he used to do was rant to his floormate about this really kind, handsome man who worked in the stall next to his own.

He took another piece of bread, this time, a bit larger. He couldn’t help it, he was getting hungry. And nerves had always been quite a big enemy for his diet. The dog from the other table stared at the food in his hands, and he would have shared him some, but it was not his dog, and that would have been impolite. The owner continued reading his novel, drinking some wine he hadn’t even noticed when it arrived, seeming fairly concentrated. He looked up for a second to check on his pet, but his eyes caught Yuuri’s as he did and he smiled politely, whistling again to call his dog back towards his side.

Yuuri couldn’t quite stop staring at the poodle, mainly since it kind of reminded him to his own pet back at home. Just like the money for him to move out, it had been a birthday present. Only that that had been many years ago, back when he was still a child.

And, unlike moving out, he had never regretted Vicchan.

He looked at his phone, wanting to check if there were any messages from his date as regards his delay. He knew he had put the device on vibrate and that he should have felt it buzz if that were the case, yet he couldn’t help but checking just in case. The digital clock marked it was already twenty past nine, and the only notification he had was that message from Phichit from a while ago.

The man of the nice dog was getting his food served, some meat and a colorful salad, for what Yuuri could see. That made him even hungrier, so he reached for another piece of bread. This time, he even put some butter onto it. The waiter approached him once again, and Yuuri repeated his speech lawfully.

Should he text his date? He thought he should maybe wait a while longer, but people in the tables nearby were beginning to look at him funnily. Including the man of the dog who didn’t look that concentrated in his novel anymore.

He opted for a discreet “I’m on a table outside, look for me there” text, so that he didn’t feel like was hurrying him or anything. He didn’t want to be annoying, but he had already emptied half of the bread basket.

Having nothing else to do, he chose to read Phichit’s message. It was a simple “Good luck” with many thumbs ups and heart emojis, but Yuuri couldn’t bring himself to smile at the sight. Instead, he set his eyes on the door. Just like he did at the office every day when he arrived early, waiting for the man to come in.

His watch marked five to ten when the waiter approached him once again, and Yuuri simply shook his head this time and he understood.

The man of the dog had already finished his meal, and he had given the left outs to his dog. The poodle was happily chewing on a bone, way too distracted to become a distraction, and Yuuri didn’t know what to do anymore.

He looked at his watch again, as if he hadn't checked the time just one minute ago, and he couldn't read the numbers. His pulse was trembling. Had he got bad the time of the meeting? The address? Paranoia made its way crawling down his skin, drawing goosebumps, making his spit taste acid. Suddenly, everyone around looked just like him. The elderly couples, the waiters, the people passing by the shore. Everyone was so frustratingly similar. Being the eyes, the smile, that something...they all looked alike, and they all got his heart to race.

He tried to chew on a piece of bread, just to do something with all the energy, the radiation of nerves, his anticipation breaking like atoms and overwhelming him with adrenaline.

He felt every eye in the room was on him, observing, making assumptions. Assumptions he had already made, but he yet had to acknowledge. The whispers made it even worse, from the girls of the birthday and the man with the dog, pitying him, not understanding the situation at all. No, they didn't understand. They didn't know his date would arrive at any second. He was just late. That was all.

He swallowed and fished for his phone again. This time, he called. He was going to prove them, prove himself, that the plan was still on march. That the candle on the table still had some few minutes of light, and he still had faith. On him, and on himself.

The phone rung, and rung, and rung. Yuuri's heart was beating to its beat. Slow, long and infuriating. Suspenseful, dragging the curse of every note, making it eternal.

"Leave your message after the tone…”

"Uhm, hi. It's me, Yuuri. I...I've been waiting for about an hour and...yeah. Sorry to bother, I just..." Come, please. He wanted to say. People are staring at me, I'm running out of bread, and just like the candle of the centerpiece, the waiter's patience is melting "Could you..."

He cut the message, embarrassed, dropping the phone in his pocket and resting his head in his palm. He sounded pathetic, and he didn't want the guy’s pity. It was already enough with the restaurant's, the man of the dog looking at him like he may throw him a leftover bone.

He thought about Phichit, about how excited he had been when he told him about the date. He thought about the day, how excited he had been, how he had planned what clothes to wear and what perfume to use, pouring all his hopes into the night. And he thought about his parents, the only request they had made when they saw him leave: "no matter what you do, please be happy"

There were tickles in his stomach, crumbles, of bread and badly digested disillusion. He had to cover his face when he started crying, but his shoulders were shaking, and he knew the people around him could see him. He sunk his face, feeling the factual burn of his throat as he tried to keep himself from sobbing. But the tears just wouldn’t stop falling and his lungs demanded him air, causing him to whimper, and drawing even more eyes on him.

He was embarrassed, so embarrassed, so tired of fucking everything up, his every hope going to hell after he kept failing and failing, always making a fool of himself. He must have looked so stupid, all dressed up and nervous and smiling, with that damn lilac shirt he had spent hours choosing. For what? For being stood up? For being mortified and made fun of?

He didn’t want to go back to his apartment. No when he knew Phichit would be there, still so hype and happy, as oblivious as Yuuri himself had been. He didn’t want to pop his bubble, not just yet. He would let him enjoy it a little longer.

The waiter didn’t even approach him again to leave the menu, and Yuuri continued to sob, silent and alone, hoping he would run out of tears.

“Uhm, excuse me” He peeked his face from behind his hand, covering his nose, knowing it was runny “Are you ok?”

The man of the dog looked at him from his own table, novel closed and eyes full of pity, speaking with the gentleness one would talk to a child.

“Do I look like I’m ok?”

He knew he was being rude, but he was in no mood to deal with other’s sorry. He already felt too sorry for himself.

“Do you need something to drink? Do you want some wine?”

Yuuri looked up, wanting to deny the offer. But as he tried to voice a no, he felt the rests of bread still stuffed in his throat.

He nodded, since he knew he needed a drink to push it down, and help him digest the anguish still clogging his chest. The man of the dog poured the remaining beverage into his glass and set it on his own table, pushing the chair across him slightly with his foot, as if telling him to sit down.

As Yuuri stood up he noticed the rest of the customers had already left, much to his relief, and for a second he wondered what time it was but he didn’t want to stare at his watch. Instead, he sat in front of the only remaining witness for his misery, and gulped down half cup of wine in one blow.

“Easy there, you don’t want to choke” The man smiled at him. Forcedly, Yuuri could tell “Are you ok with that? Do you want me to order some water?”

He shook his head, looking away. The dog came to him wiggling his tail happily, so oblivious to the happenings, and rested its head on top of his lap. He petted him, gently, and his fur was just as soft as he had imagined. As he remembered Vicchan’s was.

"Look, about what happened...” Yuuri flinched at the words. As if he had been physically intruded. “I don't know who you were waiting for, but...I’m sure they have a good reason"

"He didn't answer my phone calls" He sobbed "I think his reason is clear enough, he's not interested"

"Was it a date?" the man asked, and Yuuri nodded grumpily, as if it were obvious "Don't worry, dates come and go! You deserve someone better, there's no need to be sad for just a..."

"It's not just the damn date" Yuuri cried, grabbing his head with frustration. He hadn't meant to sound ungrateful, and he only noticed he did so when he saw the surprise on the other's face "I’m sorry, I just…everything's been hell for me lately. It's been a bad year"

The man quieted, looking downwards for a second, realizing he had maybe pressed too far. Yuuri rubbed his eyes, still sore and swollen, and took a deep breath in the hope of easing the post-crying headache. He felt so weak, so feeble, like the minimum weight could wreck him down. And he knew it showed, he knew he must have looked so childish and pathetic right then, petting his dog and crying his eyes out, softer than he had ever been.

“It’s ok, we all have bad times. It’s normal to be sad” The man said, face solemn and serious, eyes still soft with sorry “What’s your name?”

Yuuri looked up and sniffed, clearing his voice a bit before he trusted himself to speak again.

“Yuuri”

“I’m Viktor” He introduced himself, then he pointed at the poodle “And that’s Makkachin”

“It’s a really nice dog”

“Isn’t he?” He smiled, trying to pick up Yuuri’s stare with his own “He seems to like you”

That wasn’t big news. Unlike people, dogs always seemed to really like Yuuri. And Yuuri liked them a lot, too.

“I guess he does” He sighed, trying to clean the stuffed air inside his mind and clear his thoughts. Makkachin had been a good cable to guide him back to his senses, but he needed to acknowledge the kindness of his owner, the actual human who had put up with his pitiful crying, and who had friendly offered his help “I…I’m…” He tried, only then remembering that humans were not dogs and that they could look so cute all of a sudden when they listened to him and smiled “thank you…for the wine”

“It’s ok, I think it wouldn’t have been a good idea to empty the bottle myself, anyways” He said, and he seemed so amused by the way Yuuri snorted in response “Plus, I think that you needed it more”

The short laugh seemed to lose up his soul a little, making his chest feel lax and lighter, like stretching a cramped muscle.

“Ugh, you must think I’m so wretched” He said, more humorous than expected, as he tried to rub the rests of grief out from his face.

“Hey, at least you had a date. You are talking with the man who was eating at a fancy restaurant alone on a Friday night”

“Uhm, rude. Makkachin was here the whole time”

Viktor laughed, and Yuuri felt the sound echo through himself, bubbly and tickly, uplifting.

“You get the point” He said, leaning forwards and crossing his arms on the table “We are both lonesome”

“Yeah…” Yuuri averted his eyes, mirth washing off all of a sudden, as he stared back at his coat still hanging from the other chair “I don’t want to bother you though, thank you very much for your kindness and everything, but I think I should…”

“No no, stay!” Before he could fully stand up Viktor stopped him, grinning gently; hiding what had sounded like a plea “You are not a bother at all, please. At least finish your wine”

The truth was Yuuri didn’t want to leave, either. He still didn’t feel ready to face Phichit and tell him the story, and he didn’t feel ready to face his apartment, the scattered clothes in his room and the mess in the bathroom, that had watched him leave so happily just some hours ago. But he didn’t want to abuse from that man’s compassion, either. Maybe he just wanted to spend a relaxing evening alone with some wine, a good book and his dog. Comforting a crying basket case surely wasn’t part of his Friday night’s agenda.

Yet, as he began to drink from his glass once again, it was in slow, tiny sips.

“Are you feeling better?” Viktor asked, just before the silence began to feel uncomfortable.

Yuuri hummed in agreement, licking his lips reddened by wine.

“I’m not exactly delighted” He grimaced, moving his head to the side “But I think I’m ok…maybe I need some vacation, go back to my hometown for a while”

“Oh? Where are you from?”

“Hasetsu”

“Oh! What a surprise…so you are not a city boy, then” Viktor said, arching Yuuri’s brow in confusion “I should have thought so”

“What do you mean?”

“Well…everyone here seems to be in such a hurry all the time, so worried with work and so full of themselves. You seem like a humble guy, tranquil and good-heartened”

Yuuri blinked, unsure of what to say. To be honest, that was actually the reason he felt he didn’t fit in the city, at all.

“Don’t you think you are making many assumptions?” He mocked, just to avoid the intrusion of having been read so thoroughly “I could be a meanie for all you know”

Viktor chuckled, lidding his eyes.

“Nah, the smile gives you away. You are a good person” He said, resting his chin on his palm “Besides, wat kind of douche uses the word meanie, anyways?”

Yuuri pouted, hiding a grin and looking away, distracting himself with Makkachin again.

“What about you?” He asked “Were you born here?”

“Born and raised”

“So you are a city boy, then?” He teased, stealing his words from before and using them against him. All that crying had gotten him a little light-headed, and words slipped easily from lips moistened by alcohol.

Viktor seemed shocked by the question, like it had taken him by surprise.

“A really unpleased one, yes” He said, and now it was Yuuri’s turn to be surprised “You see, the thing about city boys is that we don’t like being city boys. We like to think we are oh so special and different for hating the city, but hating the city may or may not be a part of being a city boy”

Yuuri outlined a furrowed, puzzled smile.

“Are you being poetic or delirious?”

“We are very poetic, you see” He smirked, playing with him, and with a stain of wine that had spilled on the table “We are birds in steel cages”

Yuuri chuckled, wetting his lips on the glass, not wanting to empty it.

“You don’t sound like a city boy” He said “My friend Phichit, my roommate, he loves it here. He moves around so easily…that’s a true city boy”

“Was he born here?”

“Oh, no. He came with me all the way from Hasetsu. We kept saying we would move to the city together ever since we were kids…but I guess he got luckier than me. He got used to it so quickly.”

He could feel his mood beginning to deflate again, but he wasn’t even disappointed. His humor was balancing on a tightrope as thin floss, and he was abusing from his luck.

“Did you come here for a job?”

“To study, actually” He shrugged “But I need to pay rent so I got a job at an office. No important task, I just check for mistakes in some documents before they are delivered”

“Oh, I see. And what do you study?”

“Language arts” He said, and the other looked fairly intrigued about it. But just when he was about to return the question, the waiter walked right beside them, and Viktor stopped him before he left into the restaurant again.

“Would you like to ask for the bill, sir?” He looked at them suspiciously, narrowing his eyes, not really sure of what was going on or why they were sitting together.

“It depends…Yuuri, would you like to order something?”

Yuuri froze, unready for the offer. So before the lack of words, he instinctively made time to gather his thoughts with the stupidest of questions.

“Me?”

Viktor laughed.

“Yes, you. All you ate was bread…wouldn’t you like some dessert? I pay”

“Oh, no…you don’t have to! I couldn’t…”

“Nonsense” He turned to the waiter “Bring us some chocolate ice cream, please”

“What? No! It’s not necessary! Don’t…”

The waiter stood still, unamused, probably thinking they didn’t pay him enough for this.

“Aww, come on! Ice cream is good for heartache!”

“Ok…but we’ll split the bill!” Yuuri insisted, looking at the waiter apologetically.

“Deal”

“We don’t serve ice cream” The waiter announced.

“For real??” Viktor said, looking genuinely disillusioned “Well…bring my bill then, please”

“Alright sir”

The man left, clearly annoyed, and Yuuri sulked childishly, drumming his fingers on the table and looking at the other with puppy dog eyes.

“So…no ice cream?” He joked, smiling cheekily.

“Well…we could have some ice cream…” Viktor trailed off, leaning forwards and way too close “If you would like to go on a date with me, someday”

Yuuri deadpanned, his humorous mood smashing into pieces and reveling a much colder expression instead.

“On a date?” He almost bit his tongue, remembering his co-working saying the same thing as he asked him out that same morning.

“Yeah! We could grab some ice cream together one of these days, I know a really great ice cream shop that has the craziest flavors. I could take you”

Yet, Yuuri wasn’t convinced. He tried to pet Makkachin, to relieve his tension through his fur, but the dog was soundly asleep at his feet already, away from his reach. Away from his reach…just like his owner.

“Don’t…” He tried to say, gritting his teeth, feeling anguish coming back to bite him right in the pit of his stomach “Don’t ask me on a date out of pity, please”

Viktor blinked in surprise, opening his mouth so say something but closing it immediately after, and Yuuri sucked his lips inwards in shame. He didn’t want to sound rude or anything, but he was not in the mood for another disenchantment.

However, as he stood up and his gaze fell to the ground, there was suddenly a strong hand stroking his arm, grabbing him in place.

“Pity??” Viktor said, forcing their eyes together “The only pity I feel is for the guy who lost the chance to date you”

Aaaaa should I continue this? Is it worth it?

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