I told my church choir director about my plan to transition last night. We were both several drinks deep at the bar and having a heart-to-heart. He was supportive and said he is ultimately very excited to see me becoming myself, but admitted he feels not having me as a soprano in his choir would be a huge loss. Naturally, I’m pretty conflicted about that. I really hate to inconvenience people, and I’m terrified of people pitying me when my voice isn’t what they remembered, especially when it’s inevitably going to be in that crackly unstable place for a while.

On a lighter note, when he saw me, he said he thought I had already started transitioning. I’ve lost a little weight this summer and got a good haircut so my face is a little less round than usual right now. Plus I have like, dark peach fuzz on my face naturally even without HRT, which he touched like “what is this?” I said, “It’s my mustache, any questions?” It was a weird interaction but we had a good laugh about it. I feel a real kinship with him. He’s an older gay man and really makes an effort to understand me. I think of him like a queer role model, and I think he thinks of me like a young queer to take under his wing. I’m glad we have a good rapport, and I sincerely hope I can keep singing for him while my voice changes.

potential future tattoo??? (but without words just bc a lot of my planned future tattoos have words and apparently it’s Not Cool to have a bunch of words on your body instead of images)

House MD enjoyers, what are ur thoughts?

Just a few reasons why we need more truly secular school/community/professional choirs to, like, exist:

More welcoming for singers and audience members who are non-religious

More welcoming for singers and audience members of minority religions

More welcoming for singers and audience members who are uncomfortable having their sacred music taken out of context

Church choirs already exist, and there are a million other ensembles singing Gloria and Requiem and Ave Maria and Hallelujah Chorus; I promise the folks who like singing and listening to the religious classics have no shortage of options available to them

There is so much amazing secular repertoire out there that gets passed over time and time again in favor of the same old church pieces. Expand! Explore!! Seize this musical opportunity!!!

...I want to sing in a choir xD 😭

You are my dream of music 🥰💝❤

This one is for you honey 💛 it’s called “Ideal Girl.”

tag gaaaaaame thank you @wanderingblindly <333

˖⁺‧ last song: angels we have heard on high/sufjan stevens

˖⁺‧ favourite colour: golden yellow, dark green

˖⁺‧ last movie: Roman Holiday (iykyk)

˖⁺‧ last tv show: Dancing With The Stars (listen…..it makes me emotional, they improve so much), Batman The Animated Series

˖⁺‧ sweet / spicy / savory: sweet > spicy > savory

˖⁺‧ relationship status: single 🫤 periodically getting on hinge and getting discouraged

˖⁺‧ last thing i googled: I think “ca state bar sign in” lol getting things in order for the end of the year

˖⁺‧ current obsession: f1 (duh), awards season, batman, dwts

tagging @oscarpiastriwdc, @bright-and-burning, @formulahuh, @omigodyall, @maxcuntstappen, @daghecharles and anyone else who wants to do it!

opera singing takes way more technical skill than pop singing I will say that

Vintage Heubach, 7851-Singing Girl Mold, Repro ebay edolls

something about the human condition or doemthing; somstbing about finding fifty-something covers of the "predatory wasp of the palisades is out to get us!" on youtube made ten-or-so years ago with cracked voices and grainy video and inconsistent singing voices and just. thinking about people ive never met who have never sang professionally in their lives being united by a beautiful song, being united in the experience and the story it tells, taking to youtube in all of their unpolished glory to share a song that made them feel something enough to bare some vulnerable part of themselves to the world; theres something so distinctly human about that

Almost one month until I start testosterone!

It's also that time of year when directors start sending out their contracts and letters of availability to musicians like myself, and I've had to start coming out to all of them in response. So far, I've gotten nothing but support from everyone and it genuinely makes me so grateful.

The general message I've been sending to them has been as follows:

"As part of my transition, I have decided to undergo hormone replacement therapy, and will be taking testosterone starting May 28th of this year. One of the effects of testosterone (as I'm sure you are aware) is on the voice. Its effects are the same as young men undergoing puberty, so my voice will most likely deepen over time into that of a phenotypically "masculine" voice. This is a decision I do not make lightly, and have come to after many years of consideration. I will be taking regular lessons with Dr. (DM me if you're looking for resources) who specializes in transgender voices as I undergo these changes. My goal is to continue singing at the highest level regardless of how my voice changes, but where it will most comfortably settle and how long that will take is up to genetics and fate. By next year, I may be able to sing tenor or baritone, though I intend to train my upper register to sing countertenor if possible."

Then I thank them and let them know that I'd like to re-audition for their ensembles when my voice has settled more. They've all responded positively and with excitement for me, and the chorusmaster for my city's opera company even said there would be no need, as she knows the work of the professor I'm taking lessons with and thinks I would benefit from being on stage this season(!!!!)

In other news, the symphony I do admin for had their soprano soloist drop out of the Mozart Requiem so guess who's learning the part and performing it in two weeks? Your boy!! It feels a bit kismet. What better way to honor the end of my soprano career than with a requiem?

I'm still nervous to all hell but I'm just so tired of living like this. I just feel like this decision is going to change everything for the better for me.

I HAVE A SOLO AT MY LAST FIRST CHOIR CONCERT!! (aka the first concert of my senior year of highschool!!) WISH ME LUCK!!!

OMG you guys check it.

I love Google.

And sometimes I love searching for the most RANDOM finds of images or videos or blogs, what have you, of actors I discover (or rediscover), fall in love with, have deep admiration and respect for, and then want to learn as much as I can about their works and their lives.

So last year it was all about Harold Ramis, after watching Ghostbusters Afterlife.

Looks like this time around, I'll be doing some posting about a...lesser-known but highly respected actor with, more than likely, a small but dedicated fandom behind her: Alexandra Boyd. Best known as the voice of "Elaine Marley" in (most) of the Monkey Island Adventure Games, she's still acting but also has become a writer/director a few years back. (BTW Please see her first proper feature indie film, Widow's Walk. Beautiful and haunting movie, highly recommended.)

I'm learning much more about her works and, well, pretty much what she does professionally in between Monkey Island games.

TL, DR:

I never knew Alexandra was a member of a Central London gospel choir back in 2017. That won a BBC championship. And she can kill it with her dance moves. (Honestly, I've been in many choirs in my life; choreography while singing on risers is NEXT TO IMPOSSIBLE.)

Check this:

The Concordia Psalter - Psalm 27 The Concordia Singer's Library-Choral II | Runtime:  2mins 13secs

im so nervous cus later im going to this fairly prestigious choral event sing along thing (like u have to have an invite and stuff) and i dont know the parts im singing HDJFFJA

Why in the world is a mini choir practice taking place in my neighbour’s room? I don’t mind it when my neighbour (pay attention to the singular), sometimes practices. However, as I am writing this there are at least six people belting songs in booming baritone voices. I really like our choir, they are all marvelously talented don’t get me wrong. But I am also trying to write an essay and apply to be in the crew of a theatrical production, and I simply cannot do that if the walls are shaking with ‘Hark! The Herald Angels Sing’.

Went to a karaoke bar for the first time ever for a friends birthday last night and it was really fun?? Which was unexpected because I usually hate singing in front of other people AND i only knew like 1 or 2 out of the 8 people there. But no i had such a good time and i daresay i slayed a little bit.