#call my kids up into who they are | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

talaricula · 5 months

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Things I've seen tumblr memeing about James Somerton doing à la "How did no one see how bigoted he was!" as if those things haven't been a significant part of tumblr culture for over a decade :

Presenting untrue and bordering on conspiratorial versions of (queer or otherwise marginalised) history without any sources

Completely disregarding and disrespecting any expertise on socio-cultural topics/humanities and distrusting academics and historians (incl. acting as if no academics or historians could be queer or marginalised)

Downplaying the role misogyny played in the historical oppression of queer women and concluding that queer men must have been more oppressed than queer women

Bi women are, at best, not as queer as "real" queer ppl, and at worst, simply equivalent to straight women

Despite nominal trans inclusivity, transmasculine ppl are functionally women when convenient (combined with the above, bi transmascs are functionally straight women)

Despite nominal trans inclusivity (bis), shamelessly attacking, threatening and actively endangering any trans woman who questions them or smth they find important (often by unfairly presenting her as violent or as a threat)

Having absolutely fucking wild and reductive takes about ace ppl, the oppression they face and their place in the queer community

Stating that marriage equality is an assimilationist fight while completely ignoring its direct roots in the horrifying consequences of the AIDS crisis for partners of ppl who died of AIDS

Praising western media creators from the past for queer coding even under censure and in the same breath condemning current non western media creators for being homophobic bc their representation isn't explicit enough

Blaming China for all existing homophobic censoring in western media

Assuming all queer media would be better told by western creators and by western standards

Only out queer ppl get to tell queer stories

Heavily criticising almost all queer media created by women or ppl they see as such (see above points about trans ppl) or involving/starring a significant amount of women for any perceived or real amount of "problematicness", but fawning over and praising and negating criticism of queer media created by and starring mostly or even functionally exclusively men (even when it could be argued that, you know, not involving/seriously sidelining women is a pretty clear example of misogyny which should probably be considered "problematic")

And I'm probably forgetting stuff or there's stuff I have internalised myself and don't recognise as an issue

Like idk but I feel like the takeaway from Hbomberguy and Toddintheshadow's videos should maybe be "be aware of such patterns in your communities bc they definitely exist" and not "this guy is uniquely awful" and I feel like a lot of the discussion I've seen surrounding this has been severely failing at that. Most ppl who've spent any significant amount of time on tumblr prob either have internalised at least one of those thought patterns, have had to de-internalise them, or have had to be extremely vigilant to not internalise them (which is done by, you know, seeking out other sources, which also seemed like an important takeaway from the videos)

#Also I'm saying this as someone who actually watched quite a few of Somerton's videos #And noticed those patterns and stopped watching bc I recognised them from here #and had already learned to unlearn them after being so exposed to them here #And tbh I think anyone who hasn't had the luck or made the conscious choice to seek out ppl who pushed against those narratives #Would absolutely have fallen for this man's bullshit. Like let's not kid ourselves we see takes like this every day on this hellsite #2014 me would have. For sure.#This is next to the plagiarism issue which as Harris points out is an Internet wide issue and this includes tumblr #James Somerton #hbomberguy #todd in the shadows #This brought to you by a conversation with my wife yesterday #So many ppl on here don't deserve to meme or be this self absolvingly critical of this man #The call is coming from inside the house #The man has a tumblr it would legit not surprise me if some of the things he supposedly made up himself he did actually get from somewhere #And that somewhere was a tumblr post

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raiiny-bay · 2 months

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summer '93

#ts4 #simblr #ts4 edit #ts4 render #sims 4 #myedits #AUverse #kelly #dhestyn #something came over me when i made these man #i don't know #AUverse is the new tag for all of my miniAUs btw. so it encompasses multiple AUs #this one is what i'm currently calling the 90sAU (ideally it will have a real name eventually. it just. doesn't yet)#uh i have a confession which is that i haven't actually written anything for this particular AU yet #like. not even bullet points or anything #but i am completely obsessed with it #something about the boys traveling around in their lil van is just so fun to me #i love the idea of kel just being some punk ass kid who ran away from home #& dhes sees him on the side of the road one day & is like. oh. yea. that one's cute. sure. i'll pick him up.#& they literally just travel the states together #like originally dhes was only gonna drive him to this one concert in a nearby city but #since they had a few days to spare dhes convinced kel to let him take him on a small detour & go sight seeing #& they ended up having a lot of fun!!!#i haven't decided for sure yet but i think they're like... 19 or 20 in this AU #i'll figure out the details once i actually start writing it though

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aro-aizawa · 8 months

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i like to think everyone has a colour associated with them, whether its just your fave colour or what you generally wear most of or what colour your bedroom walls are. i always associate the name sophie with dark blue, my mum is always a nice turquoise, i like to think my colour is a bright sunflower yellow.

if you have a specific shade pls tell me i adore when ppl have associated colours and tell me them, bc i think of them when i see that colour

#shut up danni's talking #its one of my ultimate favourite aspects of character designs and i will forever use it w my characters #but i also think abt it w ppl!!!!#its almost certainly spawned from a combo of my mum passionately loving her colour + my primary school #my primary school's name/theme/whatever was related to the rainbow #its common for primary schools in the uk for the uniform to be polo shirts and schools would pick a colour and that was your uniform #but w my school's theme being rainbows they were like lol whatever colour as long as you're in a polo shirt #so kids would choose whichever shirt colour they wanted some kids switched it up every year #others stuck w the colour they chose all 6 years #so of course i would correlate ppl w colours which is how i always relate sophie w dark blue #bc i'd play w this girl called sophie in the afterschool club who always wore dark blue through all the years i knew her #tbh i still think of my brother also as dark blue bc he would wear the same colour #if you could not guess my colour was yellow and i always felt distinctly wrong when i had to wear a different colour #there were a couple times i had to borrow a new shirt bc mine got dirty or all mine hadn't been washed so i had to wear my brother's #i don't know if its just me but i feel like everyone has an affinity with a colour even if its n9t your fave #hence the poll lmao

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galadrielspeaks · 2 years

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you guys seemed to enjoy my cringe-fail legolas sexy gimli post so here’s some more of my thoughts ab that dynamic:

-when legolas goes home and announces his engagement to gimli thranduil is shocked but every other elf is like “yeah checks out. that kid’s always been a little weird.”

-gimli goes home to announce his engagement to legolas and every dwarf promptly loses their SHIT at the fact that THE gimli, son of gloin, is betrothed. only to further lose their shit at the fact that it’s to that weird elf prince that they have never heard speak unless to send some sort of diplomatical message for his father but some dwarflings once saw him sobbing in front of a tree in the middle of a rainstorm while gripping a fallen branch.

-thranduil only gives his blessing to the proposal once he realises just how angry all of erebor is that their most eligible bachelor, gimli, the silver-tongued battle ready diplomant and descendant of kings, has been stolen away by thranduils weird tree-hugging naked star gazing hippie son.

#legolas #thranduil #legolas thranduilion #legolas greenleaf #lotr #gigolas #i’m on my cringefail elf bullshit #gimleaf #mirkwood #gimli #gimli son of gloin #tolkein #i genuinely want to write a fic ab this but i’m currently in the process of writing a very Large fic that is taking up most of my time…#maybe i can make some drabbles about them though #who knows!#are kid dwarfs called dwarflings or have i commuted some sort of egregious error here #cringefail legolas

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bucephaly · 6 months

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It's kinda shocking to me how few people seem to know how prevalent the 'my great grandmother was cherokee' myth is and how it's almost never actually true, especially when it comes with things like 'never signed up' or 'fell off the trail' or 'courthouse burned down destorying the documentation' etc etc.

People just don't even seem to know the history like.. when the Trail happened. My great great great grandfather was 2 years old during Removal in 1838, so peoples 'my great grandmother hid in the mountains!' is so clearly wrong. And we have rolls. From before and after removal, rolls done by cherokee nation and others by the government, rolls that were not stored in one random flammable courthouse. It's not difficult to find the actual evidence of ancestry.

And just.. there are lots of ways those family stories get started. It was a practice during the confederacy to claim cherokee ancestry to show one's family had 'deep roots in the south' that they were there before the cherokee were removed. Many people pretended to be cherokee and applied for the Guion-Miller payout just to try to steal money meant for cherokees - 2/3rds of the applicants were denied for having 0 proof of actual cherokee ancestry. [We even see lawyers advertising signing up for the Miller roll just to try to get free money.] And the myth even started in some families in the cherokee land lotteries, where the land stolen from us was raffled off, including the house and everything that was left behind when the cherokees were removed. We have seen people whose families just take these things stolen from the cherokee family and adopt them into their own family story, saying that they were cherokee themselves.

If you had some family story about being cherokee and you wanna have proof one way or the other, check out this Facebook group run by expert cherokee genealogists that do research for free. Just please read the rules fully and respect the researchers. They run thousands of people's ancestries a year and their average is only around 0.7% of lines they run actually end up having true cherokee ancestry.

#and ive heard even dumber origins of the cherokee family myth #such as an ancestor having a silly sounding name so the descendents just go 'oh she mustve been an indian!!!'#i was one of the few people who had my ancestry done on the facebook and had genuine cherokee ancestry #[though i had found it before it was just really validating to get it double checked and i started finding cousins (:]#like. i was told once when i was a kid by my grandma that my dad had cherokee ancestry and i didnt believe her. its wild that so many peopl #will make it a Fixture of their identity [or even just smth they bring up ever] with Zero proof #at least for cherokees from what ive seen its usually considered really disrespectful to claim to have cherokee ancestry without #actually having the documentation [like ancestors on the rolls]#and no a dna test doesnt count. nor does 'my dad is Clearly not white!' or 'high cheekbones' or old family photos or anything #i had this discussion with someone recently whose dad had been calling himself 3/4 native but didnt know exactly what nation ???? hello?#and its like... sorry but ur dad is like. italian lol.#[and blood quantum is bullshit anyway im tired of the 'im 1/16 cherokee' comments its dumb #cherokee nation does not have a blood quantum requirement. its pointless bringing it up in the discussion of who is or isnt cherokee]#also mandatory disclaimer that im reconnecting. i didnt grow up connected to the culture of even knowing my ancestry #this is all from my looking into this stuff over the past year or so. i cant claim to be an authority over anything regarding this #this is p much all my repeating things ive heard said by people who know a lot more than i do haha #man. and this isnt even starting to get into the fake tribe stuff. the only legit cherokee groups are the 3 federally recognized bands #cherokee nation of oklahoma. united keetoowah band. and the eastern band of cherokee indians.#any others that are state recognized or not at all arent acknowledged as legitimate by any of the legit cherokee groups #anyway. my final message goodb.ye #cherokee #tsalagi

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kinsey3furry300 · 11 months

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Me, going into Guardians of the Galaxy 3: “Oh Boy, time for a fun space romp with my space palls! Rocket is my favorate, so I hope we get lots of laughs with him” Me, leaving Guardians of the Galaxy 3: Cold, wet, afraid, unsure if i’ll ever recover emotionaly.

#gotg #Guardians of the Galaxy #guardians of the galaxy 3 #oh my god the fucking spider-bunny #and i don't want to boast but i fucking called it in a fanfic #in a fanfic in like 2014 i called it we'd get some shit right out of island of doctor moreau #MCU #Rocket Raccoon #good to see we're keeping up that tradition of at least one film per generation emotionaly scaring all the kids who see it #also good to see we got body-horror James Gunn and not weirdly pervy James Gunn this time round

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violynt-skies · 2 years

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donnie loves to dance and leo clearly has a knack for acting and they’re both dramatic as fuck and-

oh no they’re b o t h theatre kids

leo’s favorite musical would probably be smth like legally blonde.

but if asked he would say sm shit like spongebob so ppl think he’s just joking and don’t take him seriously bc he’s a little embarrassed abt it (tho it rlly isn’t a bad musical tho, it’s actually quite entertaining but ppl outside the theatre community wouldn’t know that lmfao)

donnie would probably be a fan of phantom of the opera or les mis?? gotta love the classics

but i also feel like he’d ironically like be more chill solely bc of the entire squip concept. tho he hates jeremy bc he’s such a simp the entire time lmfao. can relate to michael tho

they both love mamma mia and honestly who doesn’t

and also mean girls

leo can perform the entirety of candy store

I mean really just look at them you can’t tell me this isn’t some class A level theatre kid bullshit

i rest my case.

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edge-oftheworld · 28 days

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real talk though how much of their success was facilitated by the fact liz hemmings sees 'child with adhd' and thinks 'future world renowned musician' and just invested so much love and time and money into nurturing not only her own child's ambitions but also these two kids he brought home from school and the table drummer from her year 9 math class of 2009

#she's one of my heroes fr #she believed in them so much #this is exactly what every kid growing up neurodivergent needs #and she's a teacher. she knows things!! it's not blind optimism #liz hemmings #5sos #5 seconds of summer #luke hemmings #ashton irwin #calum hood #michael clifford #neurodivergence #adhd #i'm not a doctor #neurodivergent acceptance fr #long before there was a mainstream conversation about it #some people just get it so instinctively and let's appreciate them!#disclaimer this post came almost entirely from thinking about ashton's artist friendly episode. i'm not here to armchair dx ppl #i chose to post it bc we can all do with thinking a bit about what we're seeing before we judge people for their adhd traits #or infantalise them or whatever and i think the fandom is ready #again i'm not here to say who does and doesn't have adhd i don't know that. but i do know its traits and i want to call them what they are

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high-voltage-rat · 1 month

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Actually I'm still thinking about it. Another interesting way in which RvB is anti-war is the way that the Director fills the role of a villain and antagonist (especially in the Recollections trilogy, where he's a faceless villain we never see but is responsible for everything that happens).

In his memos to the Chairman, the Director emphasizes his sense of duty and obligation to the military- he becomes irate for the first time when he feels that it's being implied that he was derelict in his duty... or that the work he did out of that duty is being criticized for being against the military's interests. He also talks about Allison's death in a way I find... interesting.

"You see; I never had the chance to serve in battle. Nor did fate provide me the opportunity to sacrifice myself for humanity as it did for so many others in the Great War. Someone extremely dear to me was lost very early in my life. My mind has always plagued me with the question: If the choice had been placed in my hands, could I have saved her? [...] But, given the events of these past few weeks, I feel confident that had I been given the chance, I would have made those sacrifices myself... Had I only the chance."

The idea of sacrifice is central to the way he talks about his wife's loss, to the way he talks about the war in general. He talks of sacrifice with a sense of veneration- that it's something he aspires to do, that he longs for. There's a few ways we can interpret "I would have made those sacrifices myself"...

-That in Allison's place, he thinks he would have laid down his life too.

-That if given the chance, he would have given his life to save hers.

But most interestingly...

-That he would have sacrificed Allison's life for the continued survival of humanity, if that was what duty called for.

...And personally, I think all 3 are true.

In most war media, the Director's perspective on sacrifice is very common. Sacrifice is glorious and heroic- to die in battle is an honour- and it's the only way to ensure the group you serve survives. This is a tool of propaganda- nobody wants to go to war just for the sake of it, you have to give them a reason that the risk of dying or being permanently disabled isn't just acceptable, but desirable. Beyond that, most people don't want to do things they think are immoral- you have to convince them it's important, a necessary lesser evil. You teach them to sacrifice their morals, too.

The way they train soldiers to follow orders and to kill, is to convince them that they, and the people around them, and the people they care about, will all die if they don't. It's drilled into your head from day one. It's the way they ensure their commanding officers won't shy away from sending their men off to die. The message is constant- sacrifice is your duty, and duty ensures your people's survival.

In the Director's eyes, the damage Project Freelancer caused was his sacrifice. He never got the opportunity to sacrifice himself during the war- so he sacrificed others, as military brass do. The Freelancers- including his daughter. The countless sim troopers. Any people he considered "collateral damage" on missions. And when the opportunity to do so presented itself, he sacrificed a copy of himself- Alpha- and he sacrificed a copy of Allison- Tex.

The very thing that derailed his life- the loss of his wife- he made it happen again. He put her copy in dangerous situations, let her exist in the position of constant repeated failure, created the circumstances that would eventually lead to her death. He put their daughter in deadly situations that nearly killed her repeatedly, provided her with impossible expectations leading to self-destructive behaviours in the name of duty, implanted her with two AI knowing they could cause her permanent harm. He was confident he "would have made those sacrifices himself" because he did.

The Director is the embodiment of the military war machine. As an antagonist, he is a warning against buying into the glorification of sacrifice. He's a condemnation of the idea that one should be willing to do anything to win a war- that duty to the military is the thing that ensures survival... All the messages that are pushed to ensure recruitment and obedience of soldiers.

He's a reminder that swallowing the propaganda leads to you doing terrible things... and in the end, you're a broken man left mourning the losses that you suffered even as you repeated them, convinced that it was all necessary.

#late nights with ali #ali watches rvb #not video games #rvb #red vs blue #leonard church #the director #director rvb #idk why I'm so fixated on thinking about the anti-war interpretation of rvb right now but I'm apparently going ham #it's just so fucking. wild to me. listening to the director's messages in S6 always has me thinking 'oh man this guy ate the propaganda up'#the OPPORTUNITY to sacrifice yourself??? homedog you sound like the kid in high school who brags he's joining the army as soon as he's 18 #to be clear: a lot of my thoughts on this stem from the fact that I come from a military family. I spend a lot of time with people who...#...bought in to the military propaganda and indoctrination. I see an amplified version of their perspectives reflected in the director.#to the military man sacrifice is the highest calling. sacrifice of your life. sacrifice of your morals. sacrifice of your wellbeing.#the things the director did were all in line with that fucked-up form of sacrifice.#and that they're portrayed for the evil they are is an important protest against the war machine's messaging.

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padfootastic · 1 year

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fully believe sirius hated the nickname Siri for a number of reasons starting with ‘it sounds ridiculous’ and ending with ‘Reg used to call him that when they were kids’ and that’s why James always went for Si instead.

except, except no one accounted for tiny bite sized harry james potter wrapping his entire hand around Sirius’ pinky, going ‘Siwi, Siwi, Siwi, pway?’ and stealing his entire heart and soul in one fell swoop.

why was he ever even opposed to it anyway?

#sirius black #harry potter #good godfather sirius black #harry is and always will be the exception t everything in sirius’ life #just as his father is and was before him #except harry is his CHILD so he gets more leeway #practically all the leeway in the world #sirius is so obsessed w his kid he will put up with anything #including previously considered cringy names #because his godson calling him siri? sweeter than the most melodious song in the world #no one else is allowed still of course but for harry? there never was a restriction in the first place #hahaha also imagining harry growing up and calling him siri in front of someone who knew sirius in school #and finding out he’s actually hated the nickname all the time #and being like ???? why would u ????#(kudos if he finds out about the w reg association and becomes horrified)#and sirius is just. so unbothered.#like yah so?#and harry just doesn’t get it #‘harry you’re my baby of course u can call me what u want’#harry is ofc promptly embarrassed but managed to get out a ‘even if i say ur ancient?’#sirius immediately jinxes his hair purple #but the matter is considered resolved #harry never takes it for granted again tho #pen’s notes

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mortiferumsomnum · 2 years

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Danny Meets The Batfam

A continuation of this post where Clockwork is in love with Alfred <3

Edit: MASTERLIST

*******

Danny is 15 years old. He’s half-human, half-ghost, going through human puberty and ghost infantry at the same time. He’s also Clockwork’s emotionally adopted son, and the Ghost Zone’s beloved Ghost King.

But, with Clockwork flirting with Alfred, and Clockwork’s first meeting with the Wayne family being successful, it’s becoming very possible that he’s going to become the uncle of the famed Batkids and the stepbrother of THE Bruce Wayne AKA BATMAN HIMSELF. Clockwork DID make that suggestion out loud in retribution to his invisible moral support.

Motherfucker. Or, like, Butlerfucker.

But, you know: Experience, Adapt, and Repress the fuck out of it!

EAR for short.

Clockwork would disagree.

But fuck Clockwork. He disagrees with everything Danny does that might make everyone live in the wrong timeline.

Is it Danny’s fault that nature nurtures man? No. No, it isn’t!

Where was Danny going with this again?

Ah, right. Danny’s going to be an uncle now. And Bruce Wayne’s step brother. Well, emotional uncle and stepbrother.

No pressure....

Except, yeS PRESSURE.

His only experience in being a responsible figure is Dani, but Dani is so low maintenance, he doesn’t need to help her much except be her support. He’s not taking on responsibilities as Ghost King yet either because Clockwork managed to put together a council that would overlook the Ghost Zone while waiting for Danny to come of age.

Danny’s... he’s always been the baby, honestly. He’s been the baby brother. He’s been the baby in his group of friends (people would disagree, but this is what Danny feels. Sam and Tucker would have a friendship-divorce if he weren’t there. And who will Danny end up with if they have a friendship divorce?)

So, Danny goes to the number one person he knows would help him in being a responsible figure in his life: his sister, Jazz.

“Danny, you’re a kid. A 15 years old kid that’s living a normal life, at least from what they know,” she said, soothingly. They were both in her room, with Jazz painting his nails a pretty dark blue color, which would later be decorated with some really cool stars polish that Jazz found in the cosmetics store. “No one is going to expect you to be a responsible adult while you’re there to meet them.”

“I don’t think Clockwork told them my age,” he said. “And, even if Alfred met me, I bet he’s too in love to even think of telling them about me! I gotta prepare Jazz!”

Jazz moved on to the next hand. “Trust me, Danny,” she said, “if they’re the cool heroes they are, it really won’t matter if you can’t give them anything, or even have anything to impress them with. They’d just want you to be a kid. One they assume is living a normal life. Clockwork and Alfred are keeping quiet about the ghost thing, remember? So, they won’t even have the drama that comes with ghosts.”

Jazz was right.

And Danny sighs. “You’re right,” he said. “Maybe I’m just overthinking this.”

Jazz smiles. “It’s okay to think about this,” she said. “Clockwork has been very involved with your life, that you’re also becoming involved with his. He’s been the caring dad you’ve never had. Wanting to have a good impression on the family he’ll be committed to is normal.”

Once Jazz was finished with all his fingers, she went to shake the stars polish and open it.

Then, she went back to painting his nails.

“But if you really want to be on their good side, just be yourself, Danny,” she said. “Your naughty, space-loving self. Before you know it, you’ll all be getting along and dissing Clockwork like a good family together.”

Danny smiled. “Thanks Jazz,” he said.

Jazz kissed his cheek and hugged his head close to her chest. “No problem, Danny.”

The rest of the afternoon was spent with Danny painting Jazz’s nails in return.

*****

Currently, Danny was at Clockwork’s side, who was in his Horatio Clockwork form. He was holding a box of cake that he and Jazz picked together from the bakery - rectangular with a decoration of a clock with Alfred’s mustache in the middle.

He was nervous. But he was also excited. Jazz told him to be himself. So, himself he will be!

And so, they ring the doorbell at the gate.

There was a small beep after they rang. Then, some grunts and shouts were heard from the other side of the line.

“--Eat shit, Replacement---”

“--You imbeciles! Get off---”

“--Guys! Stop-- Oh, shit! Damian, NO!--”

“--Ugh! My inexistent spleen!--”

“--Hello, Bruce Wayne Speaking.”

Danny was smiling in amusement. He looked up to Clockwork, who also had an amused smile.

“Hello, Bruce,” greeted Clockwork.

“Hello, Cockwork,” Bruce said, with the most contemptuous tone Danny’s ever heard.

And... did he just call Clockwork ‘cockwork’?! HOLY SHIT. He loves his future emotional stepbrother already!

“Move aside, old man!” a voice that sounds like Jason said. “Hey, Horace! Lemme open the gate for you to get in!”

“Just don’t walk on the grass!” Tim’s voice said. “Alfred just watered them, and he’ll get pissed if someone walks on it!!”

That’s what they said, thought Danny. But both Danny and Clockwork knew the truth, there’s some serious security system at work targeted on the grass, and Bruce most likely doesn’t want to turn them off.

“We’ll keep that in mind,” said Clockwork, amusedly.

“We?” Dick’s voice asked.

But both knew that there are security cameras that the whole family could look from.

“Yes, ‘we’,” said Clockwork. “I brought Danny with me, today.”

By then, the gate opened... slowly... very slowly...

“GODDAMMIT, B! JUST OPEN THE FUCKING GATE!!” Jason screamed.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” said Bruce, coolly. “We’ve been having some problems with it these past few days. The technician we called has also been very busy. We didn’t want to make ourselves a priority when other people needs their services more.”

“Understandable,” said Clockwork, just as cool. “Alfred did say that his son had a big heart, which shows very much.”

Danny made a quiet snort.

“Danny and I have no problem waiting out here. Luckily, I advised Danny to bring an umbrella and to wear an extra jacket in case the famous Gotham weather decides to pour on us. Danny gets cold very easily, you see.”

The gate opened faster.

Danny gave Clockwork the stink-eye.

“FUCKING FINALLY!” Jason said. “Come on inside, Horace! Danny! Al’s just getting ready!!”

Without another word, both Clockwork and Danny entered the Wayne estate.

*****

The beauty of Wayne manor feels different when you’re walking on two feet and not flying in the air. It felt more haunting when you’re not the ghost haunting it.

Once Clockwork and he finished climbing the steps, the door opened, revealing the youngest of the Wayne brothers: Damian Wayne.

He scanned Clockwork up and down, before giving a nod towards Danny. “Good day,” he said, straightening his posture and folding his hands behind his back, like what Alfred would do, amusingly. “I am Damian Wayne. Welcome to the Wayne Manor, Daniel Fenton.”

He’s... he’s so cute trying to be all formal and polite like that. Danny wanted to hug this kid and show him all the goodness in the world. Maybe even let him meet Cujo.

For now, Danny needs to start light. So, he raises the cake box. “I brought cake,” he said. “My sister and I bought it. It’s vegetarian AND it’s strawberry flavored.”

The young Damian nodded his head again, as if in approval. “Thank you, Daniel,” he said, reaching out to take the box. “I’ll have Timothy bring this to the kitchen so it may be kept in the fridge.”

“Don’t decide things for me, brat!” someone, Tim, shouted from the back.

Danny smiled at Damian. “Thanks,” he said. “And call me Danny. Daniel is what rich, old people who wants to marry my mom call me.”

Damian raised a brow.

“Well, since I do not want to marry your mother, I suppose I shall call you Danny.”

“Oh my god, is THAT what it takes to have the Demon Brat to call you so casually?”

“Awwww, are you jealous, Tim-o-thy???”

“One day, Damian will be calling me Dick, and I will be the happiest man alive.”

“Tt,” snapped Damian, who was glaring behind him. “Imbeciles, the lot of them.”

Then, he turned back to them. “Well then, Danny,” and a glare to the person beside him, “Clockwork. Do come inside.”

The doors opened wider, and Danny had gotten a human-eyed view of the Wayne Entryway. Marbled floor waxed and polished beautifully, a staircase that leads to the upper floors of the manor, a bunch of unsuspecting chandeliers just waiting to be swung on... And then, there’s the family. Five brothers, a sister and a father scanning Clockwork up and down. The tallest of the brothers, Jason, had a genuinely wide grin, walking up to clockwork with open arms.

The rest of the brothers were weirded out by Jason’s behavior.

Danny knew it was because this is usually the eldest’s, Dick’s, behavior. But, he could see the sharp glint in the young man’s eyes. Although he seemed the most welcoming, he is also the most suspicious. Not only because of Clockworks’ “intentions” with their favorite butler, but because Jason could sense the Ectoplasm off of him.

He could most probably sense Danny as well.

Clockwork and Danny had talked about this once. It has something to do with the Lazarus Pits. But Clockwork cannot simply remove the Lazarus’ influence on the young man. Danny, however, had free reign. As long as Danny is not directly influenced by Clockwork in his choices, Danny could use his powers to remove the Pits’ influence little by little.

Danny snapped out of his thoughts the moment Jason hugged Clockwork, as if they were long time friends. His brothers were still weirded out behind him. Cassandra, the sister, looked like she wanted to roll her eyes.

“Alfie’s almost done getting ready,” said Jason, as he pulled away. “He’s just trying to pick which bowtie to wear.”

“I’m sure no matter which bowtie he chooses, he would still be the most beautiful,” said Clockwork, causing Danny to cringe. Because not only had he said something so corny, Clockwork’s face turned from smug to downright dopey and in love. It’s a weird look. Danny doesn’t want to see it again.

Jason, while Clockwork wasn’t looking, also grimaced. But when Clockwork put his attention back to him, his megawatt smile of innocence came back full force.

Danny saw that Bruce was going to say something, but then a cough was heard form the top of the stairs. There stood Alfred, all dolled up in a fine suit. The moment Alfred and Clockwork made eye-contact, both stared lovingly into each other’s eyes.

Perhaps, to these two old timers, time was moving slowly as Alfred descended upon the stairs. To Danny, he just saw two cute, old dudes about to hug. But instead of hugging, they decided to have a chaste little kiss on the lips, Clockwork adding another one on Alfred’s cheek, as they held hands and giggled like the lovebirds they are.

It’s super cute.

It’s also super gross.

No one wants to see their parental figures being all lovey-dovey.

Danny took a look at Bruce. He had his arms crossed and brows furrowed as he tried to glare Clockwork to death. Of course, that was impossible. And even if it were, Clockwork is already in the immortal afterlife.

Clockwork held an arm out. “Shall we?”

Alfred took his arm. “We shall.”

Danny furrowed his brows. “Wait, are you guys going on a date??” he asked. Because he thought that he was going to be with Clockwork WHILE he tried bonding with his... future emotional step-brother, nephews, and niece. Not... Not abandoned and left to fend for himself!

“Why, yes, Danny,” said Clockwork, looking very amusedly at him. “I told you I had reservations today. You’re the one who said that you wanted to tag along.”

Danny crossed his arms, mimicking Bruce who hasn’t moved a single inch. “I will make sure that we throw tomatoes at your face during your wedding.”

“Now, we don’t know if there’s going to be a wedding,” said Bruce.

Danny raised a brow towards Bruce. “There’s going to be a wedding.” Because there were too many invitation cards already made on Clockwork’s table, all decorated by Danny himself. If these two don’t get married, he will make sure that Clockwork will get papercuts from all the cards Danny had made. He worked hard on those damn cards, he’s not going to let it go to waste!

“But no worries, dear future emotional step-brother,” said Danny, smiling towards Bruce, “while these old timers are away, we shall make a detailed plan on how we’re going to make this cockwork suffer at the hands of his children and grandchildren.”

Bruce hummed in thought. Then, after a few second, he dropped his arms and nodded towards Danny. “I shall get the meeting room prepared then.”

Danny smirked. “Perfect.”

Bruce then turned to Clockwork with a glare. “He needs to be back by 11 pm.”

Alfred rolled his eyes. “I’ll be fine, Master Bruce,” he said, stepping up to give Bruce a reassuring pat. And then a hug. “Do watch over the children while I’m gone.”

Bruce hugged Alfred back, and Danny swore he looked like he was going to cry. “Have fun Alfred,” he said, voice totally not wavering from how his chin was trembling. Danny took a peak at the other children, and they were all also in varying degrees of teary-eye. Wow. Clockwork is doomed if anything happens to Alfred. And Danny will be on the Batfamily’s side if that happens.

Sorry, Clockwork. But if it comes down to survival, siding with the Batfamily just seems like the obvious choice.

After Bruce, came the children. And after the children gave their warnings to Clockwork, and their farewells to Alfred, did Danny have all of their attention.

Danny smirked towards them. “So, where’s the meeting room?”

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