#c tag <3
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brocedes + 6:39 am
It's 6.39 AM and Lewis can't sleep.
That's not accurate. He hasn't been able to sleep throughout the whole night. He dozed off last night, a little nap around 10 PM. He was supposed to go out to some club, but when he woke up it was already past one and he didn't feel like moving. His phone showed him too many missed calls and messages, but he didn't feel like dealing with them, so he just - didn't. He got up, went to the bathroom to brush his teeth, and he went back to bed to go back sleep.
It didn't happen.
Nothing was bothering him and everythibg was bothering him. The contract extension, the car, the season. His team, his teammate, his boss. Everything was fine and it was all shit and Lewis couldn't sleep because all was fine and all was absolute shit. He tossed and turned. He played music. He lay in silence. He meditated.
None of it helped even a lick.
So it's 6.39 and Lewis is in the elevator in his running gear, because maybe if he goes for a run and sees the sun rising over Monaco he'll feel better and he may finally sleep. Perhaps. He has obligations today, too many messages to answer, and an agreement to go get lunch with Seb, who was also in Monaco for some reason he hasn't yet shared with Lewis.
It's 6.39 and the elevator door opens and before Lewis can take a step forward, Nico is there.
There is a smile on his face and Lewis' stomach does that twisting thing it always does when they stumble upon each other, given that they still live in the same building, no matter that Lewis usually isn't in Monaco.
(He should move. It's somehow never a priority.)
Nico's hair is mussed up and his collar is crooked. It's obvious that he was just coming home from partying. His eyes widen a little when he sees Lewis.
"Oh," he breathes more than says, and Lewis knows he's taken aback. "Lewis. Good morning."
Nico's voice is flat. He rolls his shoulders but doesn't move. Lewis blinks. There is a hickey on the side of Nico's neck, barely visible and half covered by Nico's shirt. It's a nice shirt. Lewis thinks it's Armani.
"Good morning," Lewis says. "Good party last night?"
He doesn't know why he asks. He hadn't slept and he isn't thinking.
There are lines on Nico's face when he smiles now. "Yes," he chuckles. "Very... productive."
That can mean anything. Lewis is too tired to try and figure it out. He's been to tired to try and figure Nico out for a long while.
Nico's eyes fly over Lewis' form. "Sleepless night?" he asks in return, and Lewis wants to punch him.
"Nah, just, you know," Lewis replies with a smile. "Making the most of the day."
He can't be here anymore. The door starts closing and they both reach for it at the same time from opposite sides. Their eyes briefly meet as they exchange places. Lewis can smell the alcohol and the club and sex and pine and cigarettes on Nico as he exits the elevator as Nico takes his place.
"Good night," he says.
"Good day," Nico replies, pushing the button for his floor.
Lewis doesn't look back. He starts running the moment he exits the building and doesn't stop until he's all the way above on the hill. The sun sgines down on him as he pants and teies to catch his breath. He checks his watch.
It's stuck on 6.39 AM. He must have forgotten to charge it last night.
He takes the long way home.
-
"It's good to see you, Lewis," Seb says, smile wide and uneven in the Monte Carlo twilight, his arms open for a hug.
"It's good to see you too," Lewis says sincerely and steps into the hug. "What are you doing here?" he asks, but before he can finish the queation fully, his stomach turns.
Seb smells of pine. He's always smelled of pine, like that deodorant he's been using his whole life.
Seb pulls back from the hug first. "Oh, you know," he says with eyes and smile full of mirth. "Checking up on some investments."
Lewis forces himself to smile.
"Come on, we'll be late for the reservation," he says, checking his watch.
It's still stuck on 6.39 AM.
He forgot to charge it.
#i dont know what this is but it sure is something#effervescentdragonwrites#my writing#f1 rpf#brocedes#but also#sico#the german twincest#c tag <3#love youuuuu
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they need to make killing and maiming more accessible to people with chronic pain
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anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...
#not a shitpost#serious post#ask to tag#tw trauma#cptsd#c-ptsd#and if so we should TALK about it#because it means there are a whole group of survivors out there whose mental health regularly worsens during holidays#like i know i am most certainly not the only person who feels an undefined Dread hanging over christmas/my birthday/july 4 etc#bc too many shitty things happened during those times and now my brain is hypervigilant bc traditionally these are the Danger Times#and this seems like it would be particularly common for survivors of abusive/dysfunctional households (aka most people with c-ptsd)#because holidays/vacations typically mean 1) the whole family is together/being forced to interact#2) and undergoing external stressors e.g. travel/relatives aka 'outsiders' visiting/routines & coping mechanisms being interrupted etc#3) there is social pressure for this to be a Fun Family Bonding Experience which only highlights the cracks in the foundation#and exposes the common Everything Is Fine/We Are A Happy Family lie#4) the cognitive dissonance of feeling tired/anxious/stressed/afraid during a time when you are 'supposed' to be Making Good Memories#and then everyone is angry/tired/anxious/triggered and things boil over and something or someone goes Very Wrong#weird that i'm posting this in october when halloween is...sort of the ONLY holiday i have only good and happy feelings towards#i got lucky there#also i have positive feelings towards Labor Day but that's for socialist reasons
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this is basically what happened, right?
(these guys are very lucky that everyone at NRC 1) has the combined intelligence of a sack of bricks, and 2) is easily distracted by shiny things.)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#stage in playful land#stage in playfulland#these two are SO sleazy and i am utterly delighted by them#can't wait to find out their tragic backstory in approximately 3-4 weeks!#fortunately i have like a month to figure out how the heck to draw their hair (spoiler: i will never figure it out)#also. god. i love it whenever leona accidentally reveals his Mom Side.#he doesn't care about any of this but he WILL be tagging along to make sure no one else gets into trouble#once again he has to be the Responsible Adult and he hates it. the whimsical hat weighs heavy upon his head.#anyway this is me so excuse me while i now talk about diasomnia for three hours#but lilia being all 'kids gotta have some adventure in their lives!' is hilarious#specifically because you know silver would NEVER.#100% silver not only never snuck out but he always went to bed on time AND brushed his teeth AND flossed even when nobody made him.#lilia: aww but you should be enjoying your youth! >:c#silver: i am. i enjoy being respectful and disciplined and honoring you as my father.#lilia:#lilia: maybe i'm TOO good at raising kids#you know i was going to say none of his kids would be involved in this but i actually think malleus definitely would#he would not see it as a moral quandry though. he would just be excited to be invited along.#(the only reason he isn't there is because he was busy admiring a termite-infested beam somewhere and yuu didn't get a chance to ask him)#i mean MAYBE if lilia as his single authority figure told him no then he would have some reservations#but lilia's the one who's screaming HELL YEAH LET'S SNEAK OUT AND DEFY AUTHORITY while dabbing so moot point there#sebek would never and he would rat on everyone else. unless malleus is going in which case he's already there.#and i guess if everyone else is going silver probably would too#but he'd. y'know. feel conflicted about it.
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Halsin said something like "this place is far too quiet - void of people and animals. I miss the sounds of nature" and Shadowheart offered to make animal noises for him 😭
#he said it while laughing so im sure its meant as a joke rib not an insult but i HOWLED#bg3#baldurs gate 3#halsin#shadowheart#im so glad i have halsin as a companion now im fuckin excited to hear all the companion dialogue for him#im gonna go feral#theres no plot spoilers or anything but ill tag it as#bg3 spoilers#just in case c:#screenshots
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PAYDAY
aka a valentine for the lovely @itsnotmystic / @corvids-calling - fanart for stars fic of the same name, which you can read here !!! i really enjoyed this concept and wanted to do some art for it :3 hope you like it because i REALLY loved your work & i hope this shows that !!! HAPPY VALENTINES DAY !!!!
this is also a loose love-letter to the wonderful @arginnit 's crazy background-drawing-ability and style/skill at portraying environments . wadds your stuff is insane and i love it
happy @mcyt-valentines exchange !!!!
#mcyt-valentines#things i make#c!wilbur#wilbur soot#wilbur soot fanart#dsmp wilbur#blah blah blah WHO CARES. I LOVE YOUR WRITING#i read your little um um superhero slash las nevadas Theft fic as well it was so fun :3#AND I okay maybe this is creepy idk i backscrolled ur blog to hell and back lmfao#UR PAINTING OF TECHNOS CABIN IS SO SWEET AND CALM AND PRETTY i was originally going to do something with ctechno but the art just wouldnt c#come to me#i did get one (1) ctechno design/doodle out of it though its my most recent post before this one in my things i make tag#idk i hope youre having a good day you seem super cool and. ya#AND TO WADDS. idk i love your art so much . i think about some of your pieces literally all the time#your um. backrooms drawing with tommy & charlie & ranboo i love the warped perspective i tried to reflect that in this#your painting style anddddd yeah. your composition your everything its so good#happy valentines dayyyy
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Cuddle the homies
#dream smp#technoblade#philza#emerald duo#dsmp#c!techno#c!philza#my art#don't tag as ship#have to draw them once a month at least to stay sane <3
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loving the official confirmation that beika is a loser And a hater <3
#splatoon#splatoon 3#splatbands#c-side#squid squad#i dont feel like tagging every1 atm#hi btw. im still alive#just perpetually Going Thru It#art.png
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batman/tmnt adventures #1
[ID: Alfred Pennyworth approaching Batman as he clanks away at the Bat-computer. Alfred is carrying a silver serving tray with a matching dome lid. He asks, “I don't suppose you could spare some time for a late-night dinner, Master Bruce?” Bruce tells him, “Not right now, Alfred. Thank you.” Alfred sarcastically replies, “I'm shocked, Sir. And here I went and prepared this generous portion of nothing. Now it will all go to waste.” He lifts the lid as he speaks to show the empty plate as the narration boxes read: ‘Alfred Pennyworth. Batman's butler and right-hand man. Rarely shocked.’ Bruce smirks slightly at the joke and says, “Cute, Alfred.” After briefly discussing the current Gotham woes, Bruce takes off running due to breaking news! Behind him, Alfred mimes emptying the (still empty) plate into a trash can. END ID]
#THEM <3#alfred miming throwing away the food despite bruce not looking is so funny. hes so tired of his idiot son's shit#alfred & bruce#c: batman/tmnt adventures | i: 1#crypt's panels#batman#bruce wayne#alfred pennyworth#batputer#<- important tag for later just trust me
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now it makes me sad / for loving what was you
#something something codependency#lyr from eyes without a face by billy idol :3#tag as ship & i eat your ribs ^_^#dream smp#dsmp#c!crimeboys#crimeboys#c!tommy#tommyinnit#tommyinnit fanart#c!wilbur#wilbur soot#wilbur soot fanart#mcyt#mcyt fanart#this has been floating arnd my wips for months zomg..
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Twinklaren + Oscar winning a race before lando
im not good today so. yeah.
"I mean, it's not like it counts properly," Lando says, and Oscar doesn't have time to react because he goes on, "like what they said to George in Brazil last year, yeah? Untill he won Sunday too," he finishes.
His elbow doesn't dig into Oscar's side because the movement gets aborted, and the grin on Lando's face is still present, and Oscar doesn't know what to think, and isn't that always the fucking case with Lando?
"I guess -" he starts to say, but Lando interrupts, sweaty and grinning, something manic in his eyes. "You just gotta win tomorrow," he says, and Oscar's stomach drops. "But congratulations, that was a wonderful drive, they really did magic with our cars, didn't they?"
Lando doesn't stop talking and Oscar can't catch his breath for long enough to do anything, to say anything. What would he even say, or even better, what can he say without having the whole management of McLaren coming down on him in ways neither he nor Mark can counter?
Fuck you, he can say. I won before you, in my rookie season, he could say. I'm better than you, another option. I wouldn't have fucked up in Sochi, that's a good one. You should be calmer when you drive, maybe you could win something then, that one would hurt.
He looks at Lando properly, looks at the way his hair falls on his face, his curls sweat-stained, making waves that somehow suit him. Oscar thought it was funny when Lando shaved his head that once but he thinks it looks much better now. He looks at the smile that Lando keeps on, tries to see if there's a strain there anywhere. Tries to see if there's somewhere he can press, because that's not fair, he drove the race of his life and he won, and what the fuck does it matter it's a sprint? Why does it matter?
He doesn't ask himself why Lando isn't happy for him. He isn't even sure Lando isn't happy for him, but they're racers and all the want, all they fight for is to win, and the first rule is always that you have to be better than your teammate. Oscar always was, he was always better than his teammates, and objectively, he knows people say he's better than Lando. He knows there's whispers and there's tweets and posts and questions. He knows Mark said You can beat him, but he also knows Mark looks at him and doesn't see Oscar sometimes. He knows Mark looks at Lando and sees someone else.
He looks at Lando and sees a thousand ways he can push. He sees a thousand different conversations and he sees a thousand different paths they can take. Well, maybe not thousands. Three at least. He looks at Lando drinking the water and the way he closes his eyes and the way his chest moves. He looks at the way his neck bobs as he swallows, sweaty and wet, and the way his eyes are tightly shut.
He can't see what Lando is thinking. He never can. Lando changes tactics like he changes clothes, like everything is fleeting in this life and like nothing can ever hold his attention for long enough to become meaningful. Streaming, DJ-ing, music genres, teammates, roommates, friends, girlfriends... none of it stays.
He smiles one moment and frowns the next and he means both of those. He's nice to Oscar and he's funny and makes Oscar laugh, or as close as Oscar ever comes to it and he ignores Oscar's texts most of the time, except when Oscar wakes up to 25+ messages, most of them memes and random thoughts. He bickers with Alex and George and then spends weekends with them. He doesn't speak a word to Carlos in the paddock and the next day there's pictures of them golfing together. He ignores Daniel and then spends an hour on the phone laughing with him. He shit-talkes Charles and then plays PS for nights on end with him.
The only thing that's solid in the flitting, fluid fluttering of Lando's existence is the fact that Lando is locked in with McLaren for years.
Oscar doesn't really care about much in his life. Everything he has, he got, maybe not completely easily, but with ease at least. He's a very good driver. He's driving for a team that won championships and will definitely win them again. He's good looking, and rich, and he has a girlfriend and he has a good manager who knows how to play the game and he has his parents and it's all good. He just won a sprint race, their car is improving, everything is going according to plan. He doesn't really have to care about much.
He cares about the hair that's falling into Lando's eyes, sticking to his brow.
"You have - let me," he says, reaching out before he can think about it. Lando freezes and doesn't move as Oscar pushes his curls back. His eyes are narrowed and whn he laughs, it's not right - it's wrong.
"Thanks," he says. "Congratulations, though. Good points to the team."
Lando grins and Oscar wants to scream. There's traces of Lando's sweat on his fingers cooling down in the air. He wants to lick them.
"Yeah," he says stupidly, staring into Lando's eyes and seeing so much it ends up amounting to nothing. "Time to think about tomorrow, right?"
He isn't sure why he's asking. Lando barks a laugh.
"Sure," he says, and Oscar can't read anything in his voice. "There's always tomorrow."
#i have no idea what this is#twinklaren#effervescentdragonwrites#my writing#f1 rpf#c tag <3#landoscar
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cassia tucked warm and cozy into bed call that a casserole
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do u have any fav fics / writers on here ? pls do recs!! love u
hi<3 love u too!!! i dont read fanfics that much so im just gonna make a list of my favorite work of each member c:
seungcheol - the great war by @amourcheol
jeonghan - titty-shirt by @beefboyandbabygirl
joshua - virgin killer by @wonusite
jun - boobjob virgin by @wonuvs
hoshi - make me feel by @secndlife
wonwoo - meant to be yours by @cheolhub
woozi - the perks of being that guy by @ncteez
seokmin - yuck! by @himbocoups
mingyu - boyfriend chronicles by @euphor1a
minghao - midnight cravings by @onlyhuis
seungkwan - voice by @cheolism
vernon - now you see me by @miraclewoozi
chan - crybaby by @toruro
#recs <3#if i tagged someone wrong pls let me know im so bad at this T-T#i have more faves so if u want more recs just send me an ask c:
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Some techno doodles (from my au)
#i think ive mentioned my au like 3 times. i consider it somewhat canon adjacent but i morph half the characters to my liking#i feel the need to over explain myself all the time so i will practice self restaint this time#technoblade#c!technoblade#technoblade fanart#c!techno#dsmp#dsmp fanart#my art#c!techno fanart#techno fanart#i psych myself out w tags every time i post. goodbye
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c!tommy, c!tubbo, and michael having a sleepover !!
rbs appreciated :3
#c!tommy#c!tubbo#dsmp tommy#dsmp tubbo#tommyinnit fanart#tubbo fanart#dsmp michael#michael underscore beloved#my art#dsmp fanart#dsmp#art#fanaart#dsmp art#c!tommy introject#<- i am a ctommy introject lol .... i wanna tag my art yknow... me and my bestie and my nephew :3
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@kaseyskat and I have been scheming up this AU since April and the latest episode gave the both of us massive brainworms so we're finally posting about it!!
Welcome to the Perfectly Regular AU <3 It's Scary and Normal centric and takes place shortly after the Hell Arc, it diverges from canon when Scary rejoins the teen's side and Willy decides she's a lost cause, causing him to shift gears into a different plan. Scary notices that Normal's been acting really weird lately- and what's this about homunculi?
Nyx has written the first installment of the AU here please go check it out!! :D
edit: here's part two btw <3
#dndads#dungeons and daddies#dndads s2#dungeons and daddies season 2#scary marlowe#normal oak#willy stampler#taylor swift dndads#lincoln li wilson#hermie unworthy#perfectly regular au#cal draws#consider this like a cover page for the whole AU lol#SERIOUSLY this is one of my favorite AUs weve made its SO fun#Regular is my boy EVERRRRRR#And Perfect is Nyx's boy LMAO#If youve ever seen me tag posts with perfect or regular now you know why and who they are#any writing abt this au will be from nyx and any art from me !! <3#i'll probably post doodles or comics n stuff abt it :]c#this is just a very fun exploration into both norm and scary's characters i think#quite literally splitting normal in half#and forcing scary to confront her issues through history repeating itself#ITS SO FREAKING FUN OUGH#also feel free to ask me and nyx questions abt it if u have any bc. shoves this au in ny mouth we have so many thoughts#give me a sec to link the fic lol were posting these at the same time
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