#but I gave him (a mostly not seen) tommy gun | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fooled-around-and-fell · 1 year

Text

The Two of Us

Summary: Joel unexpectedly meets an old friend near Jackson City.

Characters: Joel Miller x female reader

Genre: romance

Warnings: mention of death (not main characters), killing a loved one

a/n: I'm back from my hole to write about this fine, fine man.

please note that some stuff may not be the same as the game/series.

Joel and Tommy were out scouting a horde of infected, they were sent by Maria early that morning. Joel's had a bad feeling the entire ride there, so he kept an eye out.

"Alright, that was the last one." Tommy said as he got on his horse. "Let's head back."

Joel's horse followed Tommy, but Joel came to a halt when he heard noises. "Wait." He motioned Tommy to go around the back of the bush from where he heard the noise.

He got off his horse, shotgun in hand, as he silently stepped on the snow, careful not to be seen. Joel turned his body around the bush, his shotgun ready to fire. He was met with another gun by his head.

"Drop it." You commanded, clicking your gun.

"No," Tommy clicked his gun from behind you, "You drop it."

Joel moved away from his position and faced you, there was a frown of confusion but also of relief. "Y/N?"

"Joel?"

After Tommy and Joel cleared that you weren't infected, Joel took you back to his house. The ride back was more like an interrogation, no one's ever heard from you -- not like people knew who you were.

You weren't as sociable as Joel, though he's not one himself, but he had friends. You mostly kept to yourself, even back in the Quarantine Zone, the only person you could let in your life was Joel.

"So where have you been all this time?" Joel asked, pouring a glass of whiskey for you. "I haven't seen you in... what, 5 years?"

You took a sip of the liquor. "I've just been around. Trying to survive, don't really have a goal in mind."

He nodded, "How did you uh.. how did you get out?"

You smiled bitterly. "When you left, a lot of people suddenly started disappearing. I didn't know if they just started killing people or what, but something in me snapped and decided I didn't want to live like that anymore."

"So I sneaked out. It wasn't easy, but I followed some guys and got out." You continued, "Made some friends along the way, lost some.. and here I am."

"How'd you find this place?" Tommy asked.

His suspicious tone didn't go unnoticed by you. "I grew up in Jackson. I just wanted to go home, didn't know there'd be survivors here."

"There's quite a few of us here. It's not much, but we survive." Joel explained. "Tommy, go talk to Maria for me. Y/N can meet her after a night's rest."

You raised a brow at Joel's demands, but said nothing. Tommy did as he was told and left you and Joel alone.

Joel didn't say anything. He just took in the sight of you, he couldn't believe you're alive. The Y/N he knew 5 years ago did not know how to fight, let alone survive in the wild.

You were also looking at Joel in return. He looked much older, but that was definitely not a bad thing. If anything he looked even hotter. Joel seemed more careful, but also more open at the same time. You didn't know his story for the past 5 years, but it definitely took a toll on him.

"Joel?"

"Hey," Joel greeted, a wary glance around the corner. "Mind if I come in?"

"No, of course not."

Joel was already a friend. He offered you oxy one time but you didn't want it. Everyone had trouble sleeping at that point, but you figured you'd rather be awake than numb the pain.

That sparked an interesting conversation with the man.

"Everything okay?"

Joel sighed, "I'm leaving tomorrow night. You might not see me again."

"...oh." You didn't know what to say. "Good luck."

He nodded, "I just wanted to tell you.. cause.. I guess in case you'd be wondering where I went."

"Thanks."

Joel gave you one last look before leaving. "If you ever get out of here one day... I hope we meet again."

Joel left you to shower and prepared your room. He'd get you your own place tomorrow, but since it's late you'll just have to stay at his for a night.

He brought your bag into your room and noticed an empty bullet case that you turned into a keychain. He recognized that bullet -- it was the one he gave you and had carved your name on it as a birthday gift.

"Thanks for letting me stay here." You said, not noticing what Joel was looking at.

"You still have it." Joel commented, motioning to the bullet case.

"Ah.. yeah. It's important to me. I keep it as a lucky charm." You explained, a blush slowly made its way to your cheeks. "I killed a clicker with it, had to search for the case too, but it's worth it."

Joel sat on the bed next to you. His hand holding your face while he examined every nook and cranny. You can feel your heart racing, but you've never felt more at home.

You lean into his touch and Joel took your hand, bringing it to his lips. "I'm glad you're okay."

You admitted. "I've missed you. So much."

"Me too, darling. Me too." Joel captured your lips with his, tongues dancing hungrily for the amount of years you both missed.

You climbed onto Joel's lap while his hands roamed around your body, trying to get you out of your clothes. He stopped when he came across a new scar -- and there was a lot.

"I know," You sighed, "they're not pretty to look at."

"Don't kid yourself, sweetheart." He whispered, "All of these scars... you're a fighter, a survivor. It shows that you're brave, and I love every. single. one. of. them." He said in between kisses.

"Joel..."

"Yes, princess?"

You gave him a knowing look. Of course Joel knew what it meant, what you wanted, what you needed. It was just like old times.

While Joel was in the shower, you took it upon yourself to check the pictures in his room. There was one of him and Sarah, and there was another one of him with another girl.

Does Joel have another daughter? Ellie's her name, you saw the note on the back. There was also his guitar, his books, he didn't really change.. not that you know of.

"You know curiosity killed the cat." Joel said as he took you by surprise from behind. "What were you looking at, huh?"

You chuckled. "Just some pictures, tried to figure out who you are now before I can ask questions."

"All you gotta do is ask." Joel smiled, putting on his shirt.

You leaned against his table while he laid on his bed. "Something easy first. What have you been doing for the last 5 years?"

Joel explained his journey (short version) of meeting Ellie, losing friends, their bond, and you could tell he loved the girl as if she was his own daughter.

"My turn."

"Ugh, haven't you guys interrogated me enough already?"

"That was the official stuff. Now it's me who's asking." He had a smile on his face, but it faltered. "You said you made friends and lost them too. Tell me about that."

You pursed your lips and sat next to him. "His name was James. He saved me when I was surrounded, and we camped together. He was a good friend, but he got bit." You sighed, "He begged me to end his suffering.. So I did."

Joel knew you were just telling the story without really telling him what happened, but he didn't want to pressure you. He really just wanted to know what you've been through.

"I'm sorry, darling." He kissed your forehead. "Similar thing happened to Tess. She got infected while we were trying to transport Ellie. She sacrificed herself and saved us."

You held each other for a little while. Losing friends was part of life now, it was normal, but it was still a loss.

"Um, next question." Joel changed the subject. "Are you staying here? In Jackson? Would you like to?"

You haven't thought about that. You don't know where to go, cause your first goal was just to arrive in Jackson. Now that people are living here... should you join them?

"You know you're welcome to stay. And... I'd like it if you'd stay."

"Can I answer that with a question?"

Joel didn't protest.

"Are your feelings still the same?"

He smiled longingly, cupping your face with his hands again. "It hasn't changed for me, darling. Both have changed as people, so if that means getting to know you all over again.. I'd do it all over again."

#joel miller #tlou #the last of us #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel x you #pedro pascal x you #tlou angst #pedro pascal angst #joel miller angst #pedro pascal fluff #joel miller fluff #tlou fluff #frankie morales #romance #jose pedro balmaceda pascal

607 notes · View notes

murswrites · 1 year

Text

Let Me In ⎯ Joel Miller One-Shot P1

Pairings: Joel Miller x AFAB!Reader Fandom: The Last of Us MASTERLIST Word Count: 3.4k Warnings: NSFW! 18+ ONLY, cursing, alcohol, cunnilingus, fingering, porn w/a LOT of plot SUMMARY: Y/N's a weaponsmith and Joel needs a new scope--they go scope out Eugene's place and unsaid tensions bring the pair closer than ever.

A/N Joel & reader fuck on the same couch Dina & Ellie eventually fuck on & honestly I find that kinda poetic. The exposition (aka pre-smut) is kinda long bc I cannot help but make the build-up kinda realistic, part two will be out whenever I post it lmfao.

There weren't many people who knew you all too well. You had turned 20 right before outbreak day and basically grew up in the apocalypse. FEDRA scooped up every single able-bodied young adult they could find in the early days.

You’d seen a lot of shit as a soldier–a lot of infected, but even more dead people. Losing a lot of friends along the way has a way of making someone’s nervous system… shut down. You outright refused to make friends with anyone in Jackson. It was hard enough working near the makeshift school the town put up.

Only a few of the kids had the balls to even talk to you–you wouldn’t admit it… but you could be a dick sometimes.

Weaponsmithing was something you learned as a soldier, with limited resources people had to get creative. Bullets were among the first thing you learned how to recycle but soon enough you were creating guns from spare parts. That was your role in Jackson, if someone had an issue with their firearm or any blades, you’d be sure to fix it up.

The small talk is where your dickheadedness really shined through, you’d always been shitty at it. Some townsfolks would come by frequently–mostly the ones who worked patrols and Joel Miller happened to be one of those people. He was similar to you in the way that he couldn’t bullshit a conversation if he had a script.

The first few weeks of him coming by to get ammo or his guns cleaned were quiet. He’d explain what he was looking for and then you’d provide him with your service. Simple.

But his guns were different than everyone else’s. He customizes them. One time Joel gave you his handgun because it kept jamming and there was an extended clip, it intrigued you–but you didn’t say anything back then.

The special touches he put on his weapons became a topic of conversation, sometimes he’d stop in just to see if you had anything new of interest. His daughter, Ellie, liked to come in as well (one of the few kids who liked you which was probably because she was just like Joel who was just like you).

Strangely enough, you liked Ellie, she could be a bit annoying at times but you were once a little dickweed teenager. You understood her and why she was such a spitfire. To survive in this world, you have to be strong.

—

“I’m looking for a new scope for this rifle–it’s for Ellie’s birthday.” Joel didn’t even bother with a “hi” or a “hello” as he pushed open the shop door.

You’d been working on reattaching a strap to someone’s crossbow as he entered, “I’m afraid that I haven’t gotten anything new in weeks.” You sat the screwdriver down, “Haven’t had the time to go looting.” Most of what you stocked was either from you looting yourself or the rare occasion when you’d give out a list to some of the people on patrols.

“Can I enlist you in finding something for this?” He sat the gun on your counter, it was beautiful.

“Wow, where’d you find this?” Joel mumbled something about his brother, Tommy. You knew Tommy Miller well enough and knew Maria even more so. She had been the reason you found out about the settlement. Before Maria decided to cut ties with the world, she allowed a few radio broadcasts to be sent out and it saved your life. You would have died as a FEDRA soldier if you hadn’t heard her call.

You lifted the gun and looked through the scope it had already, the glass was cracked and the metal was a bit dented. “I’d bet I could talk old Eugene into letting me sneak a peek through his shit.” Eugene was another one of the few people who seemed to tolerate you. You weren’t necessarily mean–just off-putting (and for good reason).

“Is that so?” Joel asked quizzically, raising his eyebrows as he did so. His expressions entertained you quite a bit–it was an excuse to stare without seeming strange. You liked looking at him. It felt stupid to think that he sounded jealous that you’d go to Eugene for help.

You ignored that thought, nodded, and sat the rifle down, “Tell you what, let me know your patrol schedule and I’ll talk to Eugene. I know that fucker has some kinda stash hidden somewhere.”

Joel’s momentary distaste was gone as he nodded, “Sounds good to me, darling.” Him and his fucking pet names.

You chopped it up to his “southern hospitality” but couldn’t help but wonder why he continually called you cute things. Darling, sweetheart, and honey were among his most commonly used pet names. It only made things increasingly complicated in your brain. To engage or not to engage–it was a tightrope you balanced on every single time you interacted with Joel Miller.

Hopefully, he didn’t see how your eyes would widen at the use of a simple adjective or how you have a little pep in your step after seeing him. That’d kinda ruin the whole mysterious ex-FEDRA soldier thing you have going on.

—

You could have gone to Eugene’s with Eugene but he claimed to be busy–you also could go alone… but why do that when Joel was the one interested in finding something for his kid? That was certainly the only reason you’d knocked on his door that evening proposing a plan to make the journey to Eugene’s secret hideout.

“We could leave tomorrow morning, nice and early, and be back before it’s dark out.” You said with a shrug.

Joel looked a bit strung out, “How’s 8 am sound?”

You began to argue that was early for you but you didn’t for the sake of his (probably fragile) sanity. “Sounds good to me, Joel.” Part of you wished you’d called him “handsome” or “cowboy” just for shits and giggles.

As you turned away from him, his voice caught your attention, “Do you wanna come in? Maybe have a few drinks?”

In the last four years of living in Jackson, nobody ever invited you over for… literally anything outside of work. It caught you completely off guard. Your brain didn’t know how to respond–for one, you didn’t like drinking and the more obvious reason was that you didn’t have any friends.

Maybe Joel counted as a friend, you two talked pretty consistently, but you knew that if you didn’t run the weaponsmithing shop… the chances of seeing him frequently would plummet.

“Um… I don’t actually drink.” You didn’t want to say no to his offer, “You could drink and I can live vicariously through you?”

To your surprise, he smiled at that and nodded. You entered the house slowly, taking it in with your eyes much quicker than your body moved. There were paintings on the wall and the curtains were yellowed. The rug was gorgeous despite its age, you wanted to be an interior designer prior to the outbreak.

“Why don’t you drink?” Joel sounded genuinely curious–not in a judgy way which you appreciated.

“The taste is far from ideal and don’t even get me started on the smell.” Your face contorted in disgust. “Let's just say those two years I spent in university before all this shit ruined alcohol for me.” You weren’t a party animal–more of an alcoholic to be honest.

Joel hummed in response and left you in the living room, you looked at the bookshelf curiously.

“I’ve got some lemonade Ellie made if you’d be interested?”

Something cool and refreshing sounded like a dream, “I’d love some, thank you.”

—

You were fucking beat the next morning. Your night ended sometime between 12 and 2 am–you always struggled with falling asleep. The night was spent talking and learning more about one another. Joel was an interesting person, he was touchy with some topics but overall, you two got along really nicely.

He had a few drinks and seemed much more at ease with himself. Less uptight and stoic, it was nice seeing him in his natural state.

“I always look forward to seeing you, sweetheart.”

Joel said that as you left and you went home with hot cheeks. He could have worded it a hundred different ways, “I like coming by your shop.”, “You’re helpful.” etc. But he didn’t and you couldn’t stop thinking about what he really meant.

It was 7 am and you felt like you were dead–but you got out of bed anyway. And by 8:30 you two were on your way to Eugene’s hideout.

“He said he didn’t know what was in there but we had free reign, I’ll help look for the scope but then I’m going to search for something a little more specific.”

Joel tilted his head at you, “Specific like what?”

You were wide awake with the help of the crisp morning air, “I like to indulge in marijuana from time to time. Eugene said if I could find it… I can have some.”

“You prefer smoking over drinking?” You nodded, “Huh.”

“What’s that mean?” You asked.

Joel shrugged, “Just interestin’, I’m the opposite.”

—

It was early afternoon by the time you made it to the library, you guys took it easy. You could rush home after hopefully finding a scope. Thankfully, Eugene has his things in an organized chaos.

You two stand side by side, checking in every tub, box, and drawer for something of use. “Oh, what’s that?” Joel’s holding a comic book.

“Ellie likes these, thinking if we can’t find a scope–I might be able to trade Eugene something for ‘em.”

“That’s a good idea, but we will find a scope because there’s no way in hell that man doesn’t have a stash of gun-related goodies.” You were quite excited to find it, to be honest, the lack of supply runs has been making things a bit boring. “I’m hoping to find something for my bow and arrow,”

Joel readjusts his gun on his shoulder, “What’re you thinking?”

“You know that handmade bow I’ve got? I want to put a scope on it and replace the string, maybe even a new grip if there are any.” It’d be nice to have something of good quality again.

“Could you take a look at my rifle as well?” You nod without even thinking, “Thanks, sugar.” That’s a new one.

The pet name makes you pause as you confront yourself with the possibility of asking him about the night before. “When you said you always look forward to seeing me was that in a platonic way or–”

He cut you off, “Whichever way you’d prefer it to be.”

That wasn’t what you expected him to say but it sparked some confidence in you, “My likeness to a hermit doesn’t bother you?”

“I understand it.” You raised an eyebrow in a silent question, “It’s scary to let people in.” It was obvious that it took Joel a lot of effort to admit that and you admired him greatly. You couldn’t even admit how difficult it was to let people in most days.

“It’s horrifying. Especially after everything I’ve lost.”

Joel nodded slowly, “I lost my entire world.” He took a deep breath, “But… I want to be able to enjoy what time I do have left. Being alone drags down on the heart.”

“You say that like you’re gonna die so soon,” He shrugged. “Yea, I guess you’re right to not assume you have a long life ahead of you… I won’t say I’m sorry for what happened to you–but I am proud that you’re able to admit that you wanna live your life without guilt.”

There wasn’t much space between the two of you. The mutual understanding of what it meant, not to move on but to continue living without guilt that you weren’t grieving enough pushed you closer to him.

Joel’s eyes were flitting between yours and (presumably) your lips, “Only took me three decades.”

“I still haven’t admitted it, don’t beat yourself up, cowboy.” You worried it was insensitive to drop in a flirty pet name but it seemed Joel didn’t mind.

His jaw flexed and you found yourself keenly aware of every movement he made. The air felt thick with everything that hadn’t been said. His eyes captured your attention the most, they were such a rich shade of brown–warm.

“I gotta ask–I’m not wrong in assuming there’s something here, am I?”

You shook your head embarrassingly fast, “No, there definitely is. It’s kind of overwhelming but I trust you, Joel.”

That seemed to be what he needed to hear as he leaned forward to capture your lips. He was careful with his movements, you were unsure. Not because you were uncomfortable but because you didn’t have much experience in general.

You set down the VHS tape you’d been looking at and reached a hand up to Joel’s cheek. His facial hair was softer than you expected and your brain immediately went to the gutter as you whipped through a hundred fantasies in one second. Joel pulls away to lay his rifle on the pile of boxes and separates himself from his coat.

“When’d it get so hot in here?” It’s a rhetorical question but the chuckle that escapes from his chest makes you weak in the knees. Your coat soon follows as you two meet again–only this time you’re much closer and it’s harder to ignore the growing heat pooling between your legs.

He lowers his head to your neck and begins dropping kisses and bites here and there, each time his teeth grasp your skin you gasp in surprise. You’re surprised by how much you like the pain. Joel’s hands explore your back and behind, he pulls you as close as he can and it’s so much in such a good way.

One arm slings over his shoulder and your other hand is pushing through the hair at the nape of his neck, “Oh my–” He bites at the bend between your neck and shoulder and it’s euphoric.

“Is there–some kinda sofa or somethin’ here?” Joel’s voice is deliciously airy and somehow sounds deeper than usual.

You nod and grab his hand, leading him to the basement. Once you make it down, the smell of weed hits you like a freight train–Eugene prides himself on his plants.

Joel’s eyes grow wide with surprise and it makes you giggle, “It’s something, ain’t it?” He nods in agreement as you push him onto the sofa lightly. Joel raises his eyebrows and watches as you straddle his lap, you guide his hands onto your hips. That’s about all you know about being sexy and it seems to do the trick because you can feel him beneath you.

His lips are on your neck again and you’re gripping his blue flannel trying to keep your composure, how can someone’s tongue alone feel so good? Instantly to the gutter. Joel uses his hold on your hips to rock you back and forth over his lap, his hard-on presses into you beautifully and it makes your eyes roll back.

“You’re so sensitive…” Embarrassment covers your face as you stare at him, “It’s sexy,” Joel adds and you feel a little better. “I mean it,” He lifts his hips to push into you and the moan you let out is completely accidental.

“Jesus Christ I might actually fucking explode.” Rambling is probably the worst thing you do in intimate moments. “That feels… god… I can’t explain it,” You dip your head to latch onto his neck, sucking and licking–listening to his breathing to see what he likes.

When you bite in that same spot he did earlier, you feel him twitch. You draw back and look at where your bodies meet, your mouth waters at the thought of giving him head. “I want you in my mouth.” You finally admit, eyes wide as you try to gauge his response.

Joel tilts his head and his eyes narrow which confuses you for only a second. “I’m not gonna lie to you and say I have the best endurance in the world–let me treat you first?”

You nod slowly, “Okay, J.”

“J?” You smile shyly and he sets a hand on your cheek, “You’re just full of surprises,”

You slide off of his lap and onto the sofa, your back on the armrest as Joel kicks off his shoes–you do the same. He hovers over you, kissing you deeply once more. You raise your head to chase after him and his chuckle kills you a little.

“I’ll be back up there soon enough, baby.” Your hips rut up into his frontside subconsciously which causes Joel’s ego to grow even larger, “You love it when I call you all kinds of pretty names, don’t ya?”

“You know I do, Joel.” He smirks deviously and kisses above your collar. He nudges your shoulder with his nose and you take that as a hint to remove your shirt. You pull it over your head and he’s watching you with those chocolate eyes again. The way he stares at you makes you feel so… naked.

It’s like he can hear your thoughts. “Your turn,” You joke but he takes it seriously–leaning back on his heels to unbutton the uppermost buttons and slide the shirt off. Joel’s build is wide and thick. His shoulders span wide and his thighs are muscular.

“How about you let me make you feel real good?” You bite your lip in anticipation as he unbuttons your jeans, and you aid him in pulling them down your legs. It’s wash day so you’re wearing a pair of skimpy lace underwear. His adam’s apple bobs up and down as he makes eye contact with the wet patch on your crotch.

Joel reaches a hand forward and brushes two fingers up the length of your crotch, your eyes flutter shut and you sigh. “Can I take these–”

“Please.” You beg before he can even finish his sentence.

He’s gentler with removing your underwear, you feel hot and heavy when he stares into your eyes as he sniffs the lace number (and moans after). Somehow that’s the hottest thing you’d ever seen. You sigh loudly and watch as he settles between your legs.

First he admires you for a good 15 seconds, you can’t help but run a hand through his hair as he gazes upon your sex. Then he’s sliding a finger through your wetness, quickly finding your clit and focusing his attention there. You can feel Joel watching for your reaction. The way you scrunch your nose up and bite your lip, or when your breath catches from the way he bites into your thigh.

“Do that again.” Joel licks your other thigh and bites, “More,” The pain builds in a beautiful way which makes you squirm.

“I haven’t even touched you properly, darling.”

Something makes you answer confidently, “Then stop teasing.” You demand and the way his eyes bore into yours makes you backtrack, “…please stop teasing…”

“Good.” Joel takes your request in stride and uses his fingers to part your lips in order to access your most sensitive parts.

The instant his mouth is on you, you feel something building inside. Joel uses his thumb and pointer finger to circle your clit and literally makes out with your sex. It’s loud and you know it’s messy but it feels so fucking good. The few times you’d been eaten out were shitty in comparison–any other intimacy you had with other people is shitty in comparison to Joel.

Joel grabs a hold of the tops of your thighs–dragging you closer to his mouth as he groans into you. The vibrations make you gasp and unintentionally pull on his hair. You feel an orgasm coming and coming up on you quickly.

“Fuck–I’m close. I’m so close–oh my god–”

Joel focuses his mouth on your clit and slides a finger inside you. He curls it upward and you’re cumming all over his face and hand. Joel helps you ride through your orgasm by pumping his finger slowly in and out of you, he’s not licking anymore–just smelling and the thought that he enjoys your scent so much makes you even hotter.

You’re breathing heavily and trying to ground yourself as Joel sucks your cum off of his finger. “What the fuck?” You chuckle and wipe a hand down your face.

He watches you carefully, “You okay?”

“Yes, I am. I’m very okay, I’m just–WOW.” Joel smirks at himself and you finally catch your breath, “That’s the best orgasm I’ve ever fucking had–” You reach for the back of his neck and pull him in for a kiss. The taste of yourself makes you groan against Joel’s mouth.

#murswrites #joel miller x reader #joel miller one shot #joel miller imagine #joel miller x you #joel miller smut #the last of us x reader #the last of us #the last of us imagine #tlou imagine #tlou x reader #tlou one shot #tlou #tlou smut

148 notes · View notes

stellocchia · 2 years

Text

Actually, since I was thinking of bad dsmp takes earlier today, I remembered one that floated around for a while.

I don't know if I don't see it anymore because people stopped believing in it or because Pogtopia discourse is more or less irrelevant nowadays, but I remember there was a good chunk of the fandom at one point that fully believed that Wilbur was a victim of Dream's manipulation... which is kinda silly?

Like, don't get me wrong, Dream enabled Wilbur's destructive behavior by handing him TNT, which is messed up in and of itself. Literally like handing a suicidal person a gun.

What it is not, however, it's manipulation.

Manipulation is: "controlling someone to your own advantage, often unfairly or dishonestly"

Someone can unknowingly be acting in a manipulative way. There is nuance in that. As a matter of fact, in certain contexts, you're taught manipulation tactics without your knowledge, like in cult settings for example.

However, manipulation is always aimed at obtaining something that the other person wouldn't have naturally done.

We have examples of manipulation in the dsmp, for example, Dream used something akin to love bombing to obtain the disc from Tubbo. He used a mix of isolation and gaslighting to make Tommy dependent on him. He used gaslighting mostly and deceit to get Sam to be dependent and afraid of him.

He used... nothing to get Wilbur to do what he wanted to do beforehand. He just gave him the means to do it.

There is actually a better example of Dream manipulating Techno in that arc than there is of him manipulating Wilbur. Like, him demeaning Tommy's leadership and constantly trying to elicit an angry response from Techno while the government was being established was a form of manipulation.

Similarly, we also have no canon evidence of Dream manipulating Enderwalk!Ranboo into assisting him.

We've had evidence that Enderwalk!Ranboo is perfectly capable of making his own choices, so he could have chosen to work for Dream with no manipulation required. And we've never seen them interact before so we genuinely don't know.

People just think he was because non Enderwalk!Ranboo most likely would never have worked with Dream for any reason. But they are very obviously rather different and we don't have any idea what Enderwalk!Ranboo's morals or goals are.

So yeah. Dream is an incredibly manipulative character. That doesn't mean that everyone is a victim of his manipulation all the time. He has more than one shitty move in his arsenal.

#dream smp #dreamwastaken #wilbur soot #ranboo #c!dream #c!wilbur #c!ranboo #tw manipulation mention #tw suicide mention #dream smp analysis #honestly it could very well be that no one believes this anymore anyway #but I was thinking about old lore and old takes today #so you get this meta anyway

101 notes · View notes

rosesandcloves · 2 years

Text

HENRY

Part 3: Dept Collector

Peaky Blinders Fanfic

Michael Gray X Femme OC

Esther goes to meet Tommy for her job interview.

I put on my best shoes that morning, and Henry's favourite dress. I wore it on my 17th birthday. It was a gift from my aunt in the city. He said I was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He told me he would marry me some day. To me this dress symbolises good luck. Strength. The strength we had together. Our future.

I pinned up my tucking a revolver into a harness over my shoulder. I put on my overcoat. I drank my tea and read the paper and left.

The taxi ride there I thought of him. His face that day when he brought me a toad. He nurtured the wild girl in me and I the wild beast in him. We had a mutual understanding of eachother's souls.

I arrived at watery lane at 9am.

Walked up to the door step and struck the knocker three times. A tall dark haired woman answered. "I have an appointment to speak to Mr Thomas Shelby about a job." With some convincing she let me in. She escorted me to a large office, then left.

"Ah Esther! Good morning. Would you like some whisky, or tea perhaps?" Tommy gestured towards a seat opposite him.

I sit down, folding my coat and placing it over the back of the chair."Tea would be lovely Mr Shelby, thank you."

"Tea it is." He pours me a cup and places it down on a saucer in front of me. "I see you brought your gun Miss Charleston. Always good to be prepared." He sits down and interlocks his fingers and places his fists on the desk, as if discussing a deal. "I have a contract here drawn up, of course it is not a legal document as the work you would be doing here would not be legal, however it lays out your job description." He slides the paper across the desk. 'Shelby Company Limited' is printed in bold letters across the top of the paper. "You see Miss Charleston my accountant is strictly legal, his mother, my aunt, has forbidden me from involving him in the illegal goings on of our business. Unfortunately sometimes we have depts we need to collect, and from men that are not always willing to follow these king given rules. That is why we need you. Mr Gray does the accounts and you shoot his bullets for him. Mostly just threats, but this is Birmingham, you cant be too sure. As a woman you gave a unique asset. Men will not see you as a threat, they will allow you into there homes without question. Once inside you collect what rightfully belongs to this company, using any force necessary. You understand?"

I read through the contract to the dotted line. "Do you have a pen Mr Shelby?" He smiles. "Welcome to the company Esther." I sign the paper and hand it back to him.

"Now I should introduce you to your boss. MICHAEL CAN YOU COME IN HERE FOR A MOMENT." Tommy shouts.

I hear the door creak behind me and a pair of dress shoes on the floorboards. "Esther I would like to introduce you to Mr Michael Gray, your new boss." Mr Shelby stands up and so do I. I spin on my heals.

"Henry."

My legs feel numb, fussy feeling spreading through my fingers. A tear rolls out of my eye and I wipe it away quickly. My heart beats as if it is trying to escape my chest and find its way to him.

#michael gray angst #michael gray smut #michael gray imagine #michael gray #tommy shelby #peaky blinders #peaky blinder headcanon #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinder imagine #peaky fucking blinders

33 notes · View notes

imagines-babes · 2 years

Text

Goodbye To A World(c!Tommy)

This is from Slimcicle Viedo of Hardcore Minecraft Apocalpes. Yeah so this will be going through the days but not one by one. So yeah. The song I used is "Goodbye To A World" by Porter Robinson. This is Minecraft au and this story is more than 3333 words so heads up. Maybe making a Foolish one next so enjoy this one. Warning: curses and death

Tommy list Masterlist

**************

Day 1: Waking up in a test tube next to someone shouldn't be the first thing I have seen. Breaking out I heard the groans. Looking in the Hallway it wasn't anything. In the door, it was a zombie. The man held onto my hand as we found a ladder to climb up. "Zombie apocalypse" I glanced over to him as he held out his hand, "Charlie and you," I shook his hand, "Y/n."

Day 10: Hunting and Exploring till it was night. We were trapped on top of a tree trying to find a way out but nothing. Till we heard a truck alongside gators following it. The man told us to hop in and in the second we did. Zechariah Budlight Daytona Ford F-150 jr. jr. but it was best we called him Flordia Man. He showed us how to live. Well, mostly charlie. I found them both unarmed and bruised. He showed us how to use a Makeshift Grappling hook. It was hard at first to use but we got it in under a day. Then one day, they both decided to use Nunchaku. Both decided to hit each other with it while I fed bessy. Flordia Man ended up leaving on Day 17 to see if anyone in Florida or his family was alive. " If you ever need me just light a joint on fire."

Day 25: Tommy. It's best we don't talk about him for now at least.

Day 37: We both ended up staying out a little too late and started to rush home until someone called our names. We noticed a goat man. He told us to run inside this shop he had. While he was shooting the zombies. He knew our names without us telling him. He gave me a gun. His shop was like a drug store. He gave us both something for Charlie; it was making him crazy. For me, it was a grenade. The next day we went back to the spot and his spot disappeared. We both could've sworn we saw him but nothing was there. Maybe we were just dreaming.

Day 47: Decided to go explore. We were both stacked and felt kinda confident. So we did. We found a camper there. Instantly went in. Well, it was that or die by explosive dragonflies. We entered as the stairs went down. It looked like a lot from where we woke up. Blue stripes with white walls. They're a farm with wheat. That rat got them. We split up till I noticed a book on a wall. It was glowing purple. I took it off the wall as I opened it. Noticing a name. 'Tommy'. Calling Charlie back we both read his stories of him and That it was working. I didn't know what. For us, Tommy was more of a problem now. Till we heard voices in the halls, Seeing a lab coat with armor. Jonathon was his name. I stood in front of charlie. As we both walk backward. To an exit. But told us to stop. We both started to talk walking to a place with a machine. We started to walk to find the missing piece as I gave it to him. It was Sundown. He pressed a button. We heard it turn on. He tried to persuade us to leave for a new world. We both tried to say no. Till we started to hear beeping from the machine. Charlie dragged me out Jonathon was behind us. Running to the front door was destroyed as we saw the Zombies come in. Attacking us. We all fell under the building. Jon was calling out names Zombies were all around him. Before we can do something or get close he was killed. So we both ran. Jonathon was dead. One friend is gone.

Day 51: The same night as his death. We ran back into the city. There were lights. The shop. We turn to another way. It was right in front of us. He called our name once again. Saying 'The storm is coming." He gave us guns telling us to leave.

Day 59: Charlie decides to make a TV show. I repaired some of the base and feeding, Bessie. He called me as he turned it on. Noticing one channel. A man saying this on a show. He's been there for 263 days. He needed to get out 200 days ago. He was on 32 street. His name was Wimpfred. Weird name but It was a nice name at the same time. He is single. I noticed the street telling him it was on the interception. So we left with extra supplies. We killed some zombies on the way. Charlie used a pickaxe to break the floor when we found him. Wimpfred was confused and asked if I was the Hot babe he was waiting for. I laugh a little. After some convincing, he agreed to come with us saying this is all for the show. Little did he know. We walked till it was nighttime so we had to defend ourselves. While Wimpfred thought it was all for show.

Day 60: Wimpfred pointed a red beam Charlie was against it but I thought it was a good idea. So we walked to the top of the building. Approaching we all saw an arena. Wimpfred noticed an old friend whose name was Wilfred. A lot of Wil's names if you asked me. We made our way to the arena where Wilfred opened the doors. For us. We exchanged names as we noticed the heads behind Wilfred. Wilfred's clothes were off in a matter of seconds. Charlie covered my eyes. Wilfred went to the door putting lava in front of it. No way out. Great. Now they were dueling over a girl that was probably dead. In a matter of seconds, they duel but it stopped when Wilfred brought out a rocket launcher. Pointing it at Wimpfred. While Wimpfred had a gun. Then after talking about no guns, A fistfight started it was close and then Wilfred started to run around the light. Wilfred grab the rocket launcher face it down and Blew himself up with Wimpfred. The smoke was clearing as Wimpfred couldn't feel his legs. I felt bad but I told Wimpfred this wasn't a tv show it was real life. He was heartbroken. The sun was going down as he tried to stand I went up close to hold him up as he reveal the rocket. Thanking us both. He was facing it down and we were confused. Charlie brought me back to his side. Wimpfred looked down and launch the rocket launcher at himself. Wimpfred and Wilfred died by blowing themself up. Another two dead.

Day 70: We heard a truck with music coming toward our place on the highway. Running to the back we heard it. A truck just like a Florida man but this wasn't Florida man. He wants on a ramp and landing inside our house. This man was a nutcase and I have known a few. Saying Everything is fake and the government hoax. Charlie and looked at each other confused. Calling the Zombies 'Actors" hired by the government. Saying He needs to go to the government house and find papers saying it's fake. His name was Ronald Boob. but the last b is silent. We went inside his truck and tried to find the building.

Day 72 and 73: He was rather interesting. We thought we found the building on 72 bit. It wasn't on that night it was a Blood moon. A blood moon really. Surrounding the truck it was zombies as Ronald drove into the water. We got out just in time. Gave me an extra boat Ronald had and he gave Charlie a tree boat. On day number 73, we continued our travels to find this building. Getting out of the boat the first building we saw was the government building. Ronald found the book he was looking for about the government explaining everything. I and Charlie still didn't believe him so we asked for it. Ronald gave us the book and yup. He was right about everything. He was planning on leaving. Ronald gave us a truck. 'If you ever need me just yell and I will come" Ronald left back to his cabin.

Day 86: Where do I even start with this guy? He was all over the place saying he was a wizard. A Fuckin Wizard. We gave him a nod. He talks a little too much. Saying Charlie and I are the Protagonist. He told us he can use his magic. So he gave us 'quests'. The first one was 'Milk of Destiny.' Milk the Cow of Destiny for the Wizard. The second was 'Power of Fire.'Acquire a flint and steel. He set himself on fire. He tells us to look down. HE had boots. The third was 'Thin the Flock,' Kill 100 chickens. The problem is there were no chickens. We came across a turkey. He told us to kill it. He started to feel it again. Suddenly pants appeared.

Day 88: The last one was 'PeePee", to pee on his wand. That's when I gave up on him. Charlie told him off. The Wizard started to cry. We both felt a little bad. Till a cloak appeared on him TElling us that was the final step, 'Crush the Wizards Hopes and Dreams.' NIghtfall came with the powers he had been working with.

Day 90: we told him to leave and without us knowing he moved in with us.

Day 95 Mine and Charlie's first mission to survive 100 days of this Apocalypse is close. So close just 5 more days. We have met so many people here. One friend named Tommy. He is 17. Could talk to the Zombies. At the time, We didn't think that much about it. We brought him in and gave him shelter clothes but he would only eat the rotten flush he had. Never bread, Meat, or Fish. Just Flush. One night after exploring he turned against us. Talked to the zombie. Took off his armor and dropped his sword. His personality changed. Telling the zombie to kill us. Charlie tried to convince him that we were zombies but it was no use. Tommy knew he lied. The zombies were getting higher. Something in Tommy changes to the scared little boy. He regrets what he felt. Told us to keep him in a stone and iron bars. So we did just days after he escaped his prison. Without us even realizing it.

I was helping Charlie with rebuilding his side of the tower. Till I notice a blonde boy in front of our gates. "Y/n. Charlie." Charlie turned and pulled out the Long Sword. "Tommy?" Charlie went close to the gate where Tommy was. He laughs. "That little thing doesn't hurt me charlie." He was getting close. "Here take this." He takes out the flesh he had. Start to give it to us. Charligrabbedab my hand and pulled me away from the opening between us and Tommy. "Stop Tommy. How much do you even get?" I stood next to Charlie Tommy and tried to throw some more. "Look at me. This world, this putrid world is full of beautiful creatures. Far and wide. Listen, it doesn't have a place for a boy like you."

They do not talk to me. I just noticed how Tommy changed more from the last time they saw them. Before his red and white shirt wasn't as dirty or had as many holes. I sew up the holes from last time. I remember that night, he was scared but not as scared. Sounds weird but it was true. But Now those holes on his shirt have changed. They were everywhere revealing how his body was. Changing slowly to a zombie in some parts. His khakis pants half were torn up to his knees. Noticing his skin turn green. Then to his face. The face before was different. Before I could see the wrinkles of him pulling off his skin. He would try to hide it but I would notice it and try to cover it. Now. The wrinkles that were there were gone. Seeing some bones on his chin and the flesh around it. IT pains me like that.

"You have 5 days. Get Ready you aren't gonna live till 100." He looked over at me. "You both won't make it to 100." With that, he walks away. I was going to call him but it was too late. He vanished from my view. "Come on y/n we have to get prepared." With a sigh, we started fixing the place we stayed on the highway.

Days 97, 98 It was the same as finding lava, making traps, and killing the zombie that made it or near us.

Day 99 Charlie wanted to make a base underground if anything turns bad. So that's what we did. Making a staircase down. We mined the stone until we saw torches in front of the stairs. I was down first to see him. The Goat Man. "Well Hello again, Charlie and Y/n." There he stood behind the counter with apples. No drugs. No needles. No guns. Just apples. "How did you come down here," I asked as he laughed. "Fancy seeing you here'' Charlie was furious. "This is our panic room what do you mean" "Don't you fuckin get it?" Charlie and glanced at each other. "DOn't you fucking get it. Has it not gotten in your thick skull yet?" "What do you mean?" He looked at me. "You know what's gonna happen," I turned my head to the side, "And it will be the same outcome as before and before. But I got you bothe a gift. An offering." He grabs two bright red apples. "Take The Apple." Putting them both in front of us. "What?" Charlie questions "Take The Apple" His voice changes; it is darker as it echoes in the room. We shook our heads. "Take the apple, don't you get it? The apple is a way out of here. Out of the universe. All you have to do is take it." He started to get closer to us. Then talked gibberish to us. I grab my diamond ax going back with charlie. The man continued but stopped. "Hey, you have a lighter?" Charlie looked IN his bag as he pulled it out. Noticing the joint. "The joint" "Y/n we still have time" The goat man looked confused as I ran back up and charlie put fires all around his shop. "Y/n this was your only way to stop this loop" Charlie pulled out his long sword. "That is a longsword." We laugh making it to the top looking for hay and green wool with the speakers. "DO we really have to use the speaker for the scream?" Stacking up to make the joint as Charlie nods. We lit the joint and made the scream to call our friend. The sun was setting as the last couple stacks of hay were burned down as we waited. The noise from Charlie stopped. "They didn't show" That was our only hope and it was gone. Charlie went to his room and recorded something as I stayed near the barriers. Seeing the Zombies come in groups. Tommy appeared, 'Hello y/n are you ready for the war?' I raise my head high as I nod. "Of course Tom You don't scare me nor your zombies. They don't have a strategy or anything" Tom laughed as he came up to me. "You still have hope that it will die down after that." "Tommy came one where the other was the one that tried to change to feel more human." Tommy laughed, "Tom died a long time ago when I broke out of that jail." Charlie appeared behind me. He tried to reason with Tommy but it was no use. the zombies were already approaching finding their way into the base. Killing the once we can. I got a scar from my arm as I tried to keep it from bleeding till we heard the horns. "They are here Charlie.". We were extracted as they brought out a gun shutting everything as Tommy just looked. Charlie told Tommy about our friend. Tommy laughed "I have magic too charlie here's mine. " He called for the blood moon. The Zombie came from the walls. In seconds the zombies were all dead. Highfive were all around. "That was a very weak Zombie army." Florida man laughed."That was all I had." Tommy lowered his face. He cried. "Why is he crying?" I went over to Tommy. The cry was just only a distraction as I turned to see The rippers, going to the rest as Tommy started to walk away as i followed. Giants ripper appeared.

Day 100

Charlie and friends stayed at the based. The rest stayed back as I held a sword close to me. I looked back once more seeing the friends I have made. Heard his cry. "Give up Tommy you and I both know they're is only one way to end this." I tried to make a scar on him but nothing happened. So I did it again. Nothing. Maybe fire will work but nothing happened. He was undefeated. Nothing could hurt him. Tommy laugh, "oh come on y/n," he pulled out the long sword, "if my zombies couldn't hurt you maybe I can." He started to run up to me to cut my arm. I ran. Hearing his stomps behind me. "Come here y/n." Using the grappling hook I felt the air pass by me as I trailed away going back to the room. Lab room. I tried to gather material to make one final thing. Hearing Tommy on the other side. "Come here." I put the lever next to the machine. Tommy walked into the room. He noticed where we were and he was scared. "If this goes right you shouldn't feel a thing." Behind Tommy was Charlie, "Goodbye Charlie." I pulled the lever. Hearing our screams.

Day 101 We made it to another world. The floor was lava and we were on a cliff. I started to look around. Some buildings were on fire or were supported by the cliffs that could give out. Tommy started to find out he wasn't undefeatable. This was where the virus came from. "Try to hurt me," Tommy spoke. I walked up to him using the sword to make a mark on his cheek. He started to bleed. Falls to the ground on the cliff looking down at the lava. Taking off my armor looking in the distance to see the Zombies. "Y/n I don't wanna die." He faces the lava as I pat his back. "Everyone dies Tommy. Even if we don't want to." I started to hear the groans. I cried. This is how the other will survive. "Thank you y/n, I wouldn't want anyone else to die with." Tommy was like a brother I never had. I would've protected him but this virus in him had to die. He slowly stood up as I hugged him. The groans were 30 feet away. We both saw them. "Hey Tommy," I let go of him as I grab his hand, "Maybe in another lifetime we are siblings and none of this would've happened." He nods. The groans were 20 feet away. Looking over the lava we took a deep breath. He nods, "I'm another lifetime y/n." The groans are less than 10 feet away. "On three." Tommy nods. 8 feet away. "One" 5 feet away. "Two" 3 feet away. "Three." Before they could touch us we jumped into the lava. The noise was quiet around the world they were in. No cries. No pain. No life. Only weapons and armor.

Day 1: Waking up in a test tube

And so the loop continues

#charlie slimecicle #fanfic #scu!tommy #zombie tommy #minecraft au #zombie apocalypse #oneshot #scu #tommyinnit #& y/n #twitchstreamer #mcyt fanfiction #slimecicle #charlie x y/n #ranboo #schlatt

7 notes · View notes

bunnvlr · 3 years

Text

𝐒𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐃𝐨𝐠

♡︎P!Tommyinnit x small grunge!reader♡︎

♡︎Warnings : hc, Fluff♡︎

♡︎They/Them(if used)♡︎

♡︎Prompt:Hc on being Tommy's shorter grudge friend and him saying he has "Small Scary Dog Privileges"♡︎

𝐌𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐄𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐎𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫

You were the new kid at Tommy's college

Clique I know

Ngl the first time Tommy saw you he was scared of you

He knew your name yet hadn't seen you yet

People said you looked so innocent and small

Almost like a little puppy or a small dog

Like a Pomeranian

Everyone described you as cute

Yet said NOTHING on how you looked

It was around a week before you two finally met

His teacher was paring people of up for a group project

Tommy thought he was going to be in a group of three until the teacher said your name

"And last group Tommy Simons and Y/n L/n raise your hands.

Tommy's face was genuinely confused. Y/n L/n he had heard the name around like. They were the talk of the town. All good things were said of course. But he hadn't even realized they were in the same class as him. Part of him felt guilty because he knew everyone in all his classes. Even are friends with some.

Yet they had been sitting in the back corner of the classroom for a whole week. Not a glace at them. He finally decided to talk to them after school when it was time to go home.

Tapping on your shoulder he got your attention. "Y/n was it him I'm"-

"Tommy Simons I know. The teacher said your name 5 minutes ago." You continued to put your things away. Tommy's soul left his body before coming back from being shocked at the monotone of your voice but mostly your appearance.

Sleepy eyes dark "unusual" clothes and piercings. A part of Tommy was thinking Fight or Flight. But he chose to stay calm. If it was up to him he'd say you looked pretty cool.

"I figured since we're partners we might as well get to know each other!" You winced at the Brit's loud voice. Loud things in general gave to a headache. And he was walking one.

"Yeah, sure whatever." You brushed him off heading out the doors. "Yeah! Cool...cool." Tommy gave himself he could already tell you two were going to be good friends.

𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬

It took Tommy a while to convince you to be his friend

But all in all it worked

A HUGE weight was lifted off his shoulders

Why be wife haver when you can't befriend a girl

You two both carried chaotic energy which was one day going to be you guys down fall

Tommy was loud and you were subtle

"Y/n look I got a gun!"

"You're aiming it wrong..."

"Huh?"

*Y/n points it at themselves*

"Y/N NO!"

It was a mix of you two caring for each other and Tommy having to babysit you from making impulse decisions

Like the time you said you wanted a tattoo

He said no

You gave yourself a stick and poke

"Y/n I-

"You said not tattoo not no stick and poke..."

"I did say that didn't I."

Tommy's always telling his stream and friend's he has Small Scary Dog privileges

Which was true

No one's going to walk up to a 6'1 tall loud child with a calm glaring pomeranian dressed in black next to him

Tommy would rant to his stream and friend's about you all the time

They found it cute and really wanted to meet you for themselves

Yet Tommy left out so MAJOR details

But they'd eventually see it for themselves

#mcyt imagines #mcyt x platonic reader #mcyt #mcyt tommyinnit #dsmp imagine #dsmp tommy #tommyinnit #tommyinnit x reader #tommyinnit x y/n #tommyinnit x you #tommyinnit x platonic reader #☠︎︎.𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐲𝐝𝐨𝐠

799 notes · View notes

evita-shelby · 2 years

Text

Between the Shadow and the Soul

chapter 5

Gif by @twvstedsouls

When the police men raided the homes in Birmingham last November, Eva could do nothing except try to soothe her grandmother while two coppers turned everything inside out.

It had been when she heard of Inspector Campbell, a man she’d already seen die by in a phone booth the moment he showed up in Small Heath. He had assumed she had stolen the guns because México was still at war and that must have been the reason her uncle took her to that meeting.

Later that day when the Peaky Blinders asked her to take her grandmother’s photograph of the King to burn at the bonfire, she went. There she met Polly Gray, who then introduced her to the reporter, so the newspaper could have the words of a veteran of the great war and foreign woman who had left her country seeking safety printed side by side to shame the King.

Eva had then told her about her family dying in the Revolution and in turn Polly told her of losing her children. One thing led to another and before they knew it Eva was telling Polly how she can’t read tea leaves and Polly was telling her how having her children taken away took her second sight. Polly Gray then became her first friend in Small Heath.

Polly has always been kind to Eva and she’s glad to see nothing has changed. Part of Eva feared their friendship would change for the worse, but Polly remained mostly unchanged.

“The universe has been sending me the strangest signals lately. Must be my brother Gabriel who’s watching over me.” Eva said as she quietly set the tea out. She preferred coffee, especially café con leche, but people in Europe drink tea, so she must adapt to it.

She had told Polly at some point how Gabriel was her favorite brother. Felicidad was too old to really be a playmate unless they played dress up, Alan was always busy, if he wasn’t practicing for the next charreada he was helping papa at the docks or the office with Uncle Sebastian, so Gabriel and Eva naturally fell together.

“What makes you think so?” Polly asked interested. Eva hardly talked about her family, it always hurt and half the time she ended up in tears. The first time she went to Polly’s house, she ended up crying so much Polly gave her a handkerchief. Eva had returned that handkerchief and embroidered little flowers on it as a thank you.

“This morning as I was bringing in the milk an orange butterfly landed on my hand and in the next moment a dead rat fell from the roof next to me.” Eva smiled. Gabriel had accidentally kicked a dead rat from a roof nearly six years ago which ended with Eva dropping a basket full of eggs.

Eva had been just about to turn eighteen and Gabriel was a week away from turning twenty, first time they had laughed since their eldest sister, Felicidad, died in childbirth and their parents had died at the hands of the Americans in the Battle of Veracruz the year before. “I looked up, to see where the rat had fallen from, and instead I saw Gabriel leaning out the window laughing telling me to be happy. When I got back inside, I found my cards on the floor with the Two of Cups at the very top.”

Two of cups meant a soulmate, or a perfect romantic partner when it’s a reading about love, and while Eva didn’t truly believe in the idea of soulmates anymore, part of her liked the idea of the infamous Thomas Shelby being hers. Like they were just meant to find each other.

“You know when I first met you, I thought you would be perfect for him.” This was news to Eva, she was no stranger to matchmaking, but she had not seen Polly wanting to set her up with her nephews, least of all Thomas.

“Had you told me that months ago, I would have said you were insane, Pol.” Eva jokes. Black Star Day would have ended so differently had Tommy never grown curious about her. “To think it just a month ago he asked my uncle for his blessing to take me to the Derby.”

“I was afraid that whatever you saw at the Derby had scared you off, I’m glad to see it didn’t.” Polly thanks her for the tea making sure they kept their noise to a minimum.

Eva and Tommy had agreed to keep it between them, after all they were the ones defying fate, but Polly is the exception. “Sometimes my second sight will show me things that aren’t true just to fuck with my emotions.”

“You felt the pain of heartbreak just as you realized you are in love with him.” Polly says with a knowing smile and Eva blushes. Even if the nuns at her school had practically beat her shyness out of her, nothing could really stop her from turning as red as a strawberry when talking about love. “I might not have the sight anymore, but I can read people, Eva.”

Elizabeth Gray nee Shelby had been born with the second sight like Eva, something she inherited from her mother. Unlike Eva, Polly didn’t practice witchcraft ---although many witches would argue that the minor things Eva does doesn’t count--- and unlike Polly, Eva hasn’t lost her second sight to her own grief. The only way to bring it back is to have a near death experience, but Eva isn’t going to tell her that anytime soon.

“A skill that hasn’t led you wrong. Tommy says he is over her, and I have decided that I will believe him.” for now. Eva doesn’t need to say her name. Grace Burgess is a curse in Small Heath. Some said she was killed at the train station by the Inspector, but Eva had seen her shoot the man in the knee.

“Tommy wouldn’t hurt you like that.” Polly assures her, as if she knew that unsaid ‘for now’. “Thomas Shelby is very stupid when it comes to love, but he is not the type to betray someone that way.”

“I know, I told him love was making him stupid the day I warned him about Grace.” She admits. All people were made stupid by love, nothing blinds you to reality more than love.

Which was why Tommy hadn’t believed her thus leading to the chain of events that culminated with Eva asking the universe for a sign that she and Tommy were meant to be and it responded in the most Gabriel-esque way it could. “And now many months later the Universe has told me I won’t find a better man than Thomas Shelby, whole thing would have sent me straight to Bedlam had I seen it coming.”

The postman knocks on the door, loudly because he is new and still hasn’t figured out there is an elderly woman who panics at loud noises. “Speaking of Bedlam,” Eva mutters under her breath.

She had already seen her rejection for her approval to become a British Subject ---because this pretentious country used the word subjects and not citizens--- thanks to the efforts of one Grace Burgess. Had Grace not said anything to the police about her father being wanted for murder, perhaps one Eva Smith Riley would not be facing possible deportation, a deportation that leads her to be executed for treason she did not commit.

Unfortunately, there is only one other way to get a British citizenship.

#between the shadow and the soul #oc fanfiction #oc fanfic #thomas shelby x oc #tommy shelby x oc #peaky blinders fanfiction #peaky blinder fanfic #thomas shelby imagine #ocappreciation #oc appreciation

70 notes · View notes

ellieswhoreeee · 3 years

Text

The Two of Us. pt 2

authors note; thank you guys for the support, it really means a lot to me! Im glad you guys liking the story so far! Anyways, here’s part two! Also, i’d like to apologize in advance for any errors or if something doesn’t make sense. English isn’t my first language so i’m sorry if there’s something wrong :)

Endgame pairings: Ellie Williams x fem! reader.

Warnings: Violence, marijuana, swearing, ect.

———————————————————————

It really hurt seeing them together.

You felt the disappointment, the hurt and the jealousy as they simply talked. Though you know there was a deeper meaning behind their seemingly innocent conversation. You know more than anyone about them. Being one Ellie’s best friends is both a blessing and a curse.

She smiled, looking slightly flustered after Cat whispered something in her ear, and you couldn’t help but clench your jaw at that.

It was a troubling sight, really it was. Everything seemed so off. Like it wasn’t real. But it was. Ellie was laughing with the cool girl who can do tattoos, one of your friends. God, it really felt like you were getting jabbed in the heart over and over again.

But you had no right to jealous at all. She wasn’t yours to be jealous about.

Cat looked around, making sure nobody was looking- but held eye contact with you for a moment before she leaned in and kissed Ellie on the lips. That’s when you finally looked away, continuing to fix Gemini’s saddle.

Gemini was tied to the fence by the barn and was close to the fence. Other horses lined up beside his right side. Today’s group was getting to leave for the morning. Earlier than usual.

Mondays are rough.

“How long have they been together now?” Jesse asked when he walked over to you as you were packing up for patrol. You turned to look at him so you could have an actual conversation. He looked directly into your eyes, almost as if he was trying to figure you out. Jesse was someone who could see everything with one look. You kinda hated him for knowing so much about how you felt about Ellie without telling him much about it.

“…I wanna say 2 months, but we both know it’s been longer than that.” You replied with a frown, continuing to distract yourself by finishing to prep Gemini for patrol.

“Y/n, could you stop looking so miserable? It’s starting to bum me out.”

You chuckled lightly, finally stepping away from Gemini and decided to lean against the wooden fence beside your horse. Jesse decided to the same, and he leaned against it with you. You looked down at your hands, deciding to pick at your cuticles just so you wouldn’t look at the couple. “Why don’t you look just as miserable as me? Didn’t Dina break up with you? Again.”

“Ouch, you really know how to turn on certain emotions.”

“I’m serious. Like, i haven’t been broke up with, yet here i am…” You paused, you stopped picking at your cuticles just to look across the street, where the couple was. Happily minding their business. Ellie and Cat were talking and laughing sweetly. Again, with that pain in your chest. “Utterly heartbroken.”

Jesse patted you on the back, it was his way of comforting you since he had no idea how else to help. “It won’t get easier. One moment you think you’re stronger than whatever you’re feeling but then… you realize it doesn’t matter how good you hide it. If you keep on hiding it, the pain will get to you before you can express those feelings properly.”

“I’m gonna be honest Jesse… I have no idea what you mean by that.”

“Of course you don’t…” He mumbled with a laugh. Again he patted you on the back and pushed himself off the fence. “Think about it clearly.” He then walked off, somewhere towards Maria and some other adults.

Again, you and Gemini were left alone together.

You couldn’t help but think about what Jesse brought up earlier. What did he mean by that? You’re not sure how to process what he meant. Either you were completely clueless- or Jesse tried to be all wise but failed.

“Y/n! Come over here.” You heard Maria’s voice, which broke you from your trance. You left Gemini tied to the post as you walked over to Maria and some other people. Mila and Benji smirk at you as you walk closer. Mila and Benji are your close friends and have been for a while. Though you haven’t seen them lately because of work. Everyone is extra busy lately. Mostly.

“Look who finally decided to join us.” Benji remarked as he wrapped his arm around you once you were close. He pulled you closer and walked towards Maria’s table that was used for placing maps for patrol.

You pushed him off of you gently and made a grossed out face at him. “You really stink, Benji. When was the last time you took a shower?”

Benji only smiled and raised his left arm up to smell his armpit and his clothes too. “It’s my natural musk, all the ladies love it.”

You and Mila looked at each other simultaneously. It was as if you were on the same wavelength. Both of your rolled your eyes at him. “As a lady, i will be speaking for everyone when i say you smell nasty.” Mila exposed truthfully while crossing her arms on her chest.

“Hold up, you’re not a lady, you’re a brute.”

“Oh, i’m the brute? You haven’t taken a proper shower in weeks. Jumping into lakes and rivers don’t count.”

“Says who? It’s more natural,”

“More like nasty.”

You ignored the two bickering idiots and moved closer to the table where Maria was. “What were you thinking Maria?” You asked, looking down at the map of the area. It stretched out for miles.

She looked up at you. “Have you ever done the urban trails? It leads up to the dam checkpoint.”

You shook your in response. “I haven’t. Do you want me to take that route? You should pair me up with someone who’s done that trail then.”

There’s a lot of trails, so there are at least 10 or 15 trails you’ve never done before. These type of trails are the longer routes. The reason you haven’t done those routes is because Tommy isn’t that confident in you to take on the longer routes.

But now it was different, not only are you older but more capable of handling yourself more than anyone.

“You’re right…” Maria paused, she was thinking, trying to slowly put some pieces together. “But there isn’t anyone on duty right now who knows the trails that i can think of.”

Jesse’s head perked up at what she said, smirking at you from across the table. He was right next to Maria like always. She trusts him a lot because he was also a natural leader. “Actually, Ellie knows that trail.”

You instinctively felt your heartbeat start to speed up, and your face started to warm up at his insinuation. You knew what he was doing. “Ellie and Dina are already planning on running their routes on chestnut drive. I can take a group and we’ll figure it out together.” You intervened, giving Jesse a look that said, ‘shut up’.

“No, Jesse is right. You and Ellie can take the urban trails. It’ll be much faster with you two clearing that area. We can’t send a group to one trail- especially not now when we’ve been getting reports of infected in the southern territories- the opposite direction of urban trails.”

You sighed, knowing that her words were always final. You scratched the back of your neck- feeling an inch. “I’ll go let Ellie know. Jesse talk to Dina.” You give him another glare and just he smiled, sending a wink your way.

You turned around, looking over at where Cat and Ellie were still talking. Lately, things have been awkward between you two. It may have something to do with the fact that you maybe- just maybe that you were avoiding her.

It didn’t really matter, Ellie hasn’t noticed anything differently anyways. Or so you assumed.

“Ellie!” At the sound of your voice she quickly turned away from her girlfriend. She dropped Cats hands and fully turned to face you. Her full attention was now on you. But of course, you didn’t notice that either. “Assignments! Let’s go, kiss your girlfriend goodbye and get your ass on shimmer!”

It was getting easier to hide your feelings, even your distain for the couple and how you felt about Ellie.

“Fuck… Alright, just give me a minute!”

You gave her a thumbs up, and turned away. You walked towards your horse, seeing Jesse waiting there for you. He must have finished talking with Dina. He held out a hunting rifle and a shotgun towards you. He looked between both guns. “Which one do you prefer?” He questioned.

You smiled, looking at both guns. “Quite the tough question, Jes.”

Ellie walked up behind you, looking right over your shoulder. She was so close to you. Your breathe hitched lightly as she observed both guns. “I think you’re more of a rifle girl. It suits you more than a shotgun.”

Jesse grinned, and his eyes sparkled for a moment when you looked at him. He then nodded, agreeing with what Ellie had said. “That settles that then.” He held the rifle for you to take, which you did. Jesse then passed the shotgun to Ellie.

With the help of the sling, you tossed the rifle over your shoulder. Ellie was staring at you, trying desperately to get your attention without having to say anything but you were occupied with Gemini once again. She sighed, and decided to just start the conversation.

“So… Where have you been lately? I haven’t seen you around, not even in the mess hall.” Ellie hesitated but walked over to Gemini’s mane. You were by his saddle, and when you stared into her eyes it felt like it was only you and her. Instinctively, your eyes trailed from her eyes to her lips. You couldn’t help it. She was so close. Ellie shyly looked down at her hands as she continued to mess with Gemini’s mane. “I’ve uh… Missed hanging out with you. We still haven’t finished our halo campaign.”

You bit the inside of you cheek, and decided that laughing nervously would help ease your nerves. “Yeah, i’m sorry about that. I asked Maria for more assignments since… You know, i have nothing better to do.”

Ellie wanted to say something but held her tongue. She wanted to say something to continue your conversation but you interrupted her instead. “Listen, Maria wants you and me to handle the urban trails. Pretty sure we have to replace Danny and Axel at the dam checkpoint …”

“You and i,” Ellie corrected suddenly, making you stare at her in disbelief and confusion. She gave you a smirk. “You said ‘you and me’ but that isn’t proper grammar.”

You rolled your eyes playfully at her. “Fuck off, Williams. Did you even listen to a word i said?”

“So, we’re back to last names? Since when?”

“Since you decided to be a grammar queen, you dick.”

“Woah! Language, there are children around, L/n!”

“The only child i see is you.” You replied with a happy smile on your face. You and Ellie climbed on your horses and waited by the gates. Ellie continue to talk to you like nothing was wrong- well, not like she knew if there was something wrong anyways. You kept stuff to yourself.

You missed this. You missed hanging out with Ellie. You just… Missing having her by your side, kicking the worlds ass together but now… Ellie was with Cat. Her relationship put a wedge on your friendship. You felt farther away to Ellie then ever.

Everything has changed. Which sucked because you weren’t sure how to deal with the changes. It was all going by so fast. You just wished everything was different. It was selfish of you but… You didn’t care.

“Y/n, you with me?” Ellie snapped you out of your thoughts. She looked back at you as the gates opened.

You nodded. “Always.”

#ellie williams x reader #ellie x reader #reader insert #the last of us part two #jesse tlou #dina tlou #maria tlou #tommy tlou #joel miller #tlou2 ellie

93 notes · View notes

romeulusroy · 3 years

Text

Being The Smartest Shelby Would Include:

Polly knew you were smart from the start

She said so when you were a baby, but of course no one believed her

Everyone thought their kids were special, but you really were

Born just a few years before Finn, you weren't the baby, but you definitely weren't the oldest, so it was hard to be taken seriously

It started with your homework

You spent a lot of nights trying to tell your siblings it was just too easy

You weren't just getting every answer right, you were finishing pages of work in minutes, faster than anyone in your class

Eventually, you moved on to your brothers work

Finding it discarded on the table, you recognized Johns scraggly handwriting

He'd only made it halfway through, so you decided to finish it, even fixing some of his mistakes along the way

You wanted to show them what you'd done, but of course no one listened

At least, not until you stood on your chair and demanded that someone look over your work

It was a bit dramatic, and made for an embarassing story later, but you wanted to be heard

They did, finally, and they were shocked

Tommy handed it to John, who passed to Ada, skipping over Arthur, who eventually got it to Polly

"Well?"

"It's right, all of it. . . ."

"Fuck."

It wasn't just math though. You were reading every book you could find, even the ones your siblings struggled to get through

You had a knack for puzzles, for figuring things out no one else could, able to pull things apart and put them together just in your head

Polly knew, and she was going to do something about it

Anything she could find to keep you entertained, occupied, your mind at work, she'd bring it home

You had an incredible memory too, remembering everything from the contents on the back of bottles you brothers drank from to entire speeches Polly gave when all of you were misbehaving

It was amazing, to say the least

You were a kid when your brothers went off to war, so it was mostly Ada and Polly who spent long nights with you at the table over homework

You didn't think it was fair, that you were forced to stay in school when none of your siblings were

Polly called it a gift, said you shouldn't take it for granted

She had big plans for you, the kind of career kids like you could only dream of

Finn grows up with you reading to him every night

Even helping him with schoolwork, though that didn't last very long

It still irks you Polly let's Finn drop school, not even getting past reading himself, but you know better than to push the subject

By the time your brothers come back, thankfully all in one piece, you've become a bit of a myth or legend around the Small Heath

Not only are you taller and with more acne, a young teenager, you've made a name for yourself, and a business

After school you could be found with a hat on the ground, getting pocket change for your "abilities"

Showing off and splitting the money with friends, you put on shows

Memorizing the faces of strangers, drawing them almost perfectly by hand, reciting lines of poetry from class all from memory, etc.

Sometimes you bring Finn along, promising candy for his silence, making him part of the act

Your favorite is showing off the languages you've lesrned, switching between Romani, French, Italian, and German (to name a few) without a second thought, so effortlessly

Arthur caught you once, but instead of saying anything, he simply cheered you on, laughing at the fact that your business was doing better than the familys

You spent a lot of time in the shop like Finn, growing up there, but never really allowed in on business, not even to listen

Instead you were ordered to be quiet and focus on your studies

And you did, for a few years, slipping notes to John about what you thought would improve business, pressing your ear to the door to listen, putting up with being categorized as "one of the kids" with Finn

And then you made an announcement, one that almost killed Polly

You weren't going to university, and instead you'd be joining the family business

Your aunt put up a good fight, but your brothers were more than happy to welcome you, with rules of course

Ada wasn't too thrilled either, knowing how smart you were, and how special it was, but she wasn't going to stop you

Pol was, or at least she was going to try

"You could be anything you want y/n."

"And I choose this."

"You're-"

"Wasting my potential? So you've said."

You'd be more behind the scenes, working on the business side rather than the side with razors and guns

Your brothers were more than happy to hear that, though you'd gotten more than a few comments muttered by Pol

If you really wanted to, you could always be a doctor or a lawyer later in life, for now this is what you wanted most

You were finally part of your family

Within the first week, you have a full list of what could be improved and you're center stage in the family meeting

To say that was nerve wrecking was an understatement

Tommy had his doubts, of course, but John knew you'd been keeping their heads above water for a long time

"Go on then, you've got our attention."

You were the one they went to check over the books, the numbers, catching mistakes no one else did

It wasn't just spelling mistakes or addition issues, you were taking stock in inventory, in all the bullets that were wasted, the little things that went missing that no one seemed to notice

It didn't take long for you to work your way up, prove yourself not only to Tommy, but Pol too, showing her this wasn't a waste of your time

She's still not thrilled, but you're as stubborn as the rest, and she knows it's a losing battle

At least you're being smart with your work

Tommy made you check over every contract and agreement he made, making sure he didn't miss a single detail that would screw them over

He brought you to the races too, working out probability, though your math was shaky at best under that kind of pressure and uncertainty

You were the one counting the profits and losses too, weighing the options of whether or not to invest

You're really the only one who knows just how much the family makes

That is a dangerous thing in itself

You make friends quite easily

Not only can you speak an array of languages, bonding with everyone, but you've got that Shelby charm and good looks, too

You're quite popular, though your brothers constantly get in the way of any potential relationship

You're smart though, and not just for their gain, but yours too

If and when you're ready to date, you'll find a way

Alfie adores you

Tommy drives him mad, but he'd have you over any day

Not only does he love the fact that you can keep up with him, witty beyond belief, but your Hebrew is perfect

"So, you're the brains behind the whole operation?"

"Something like that."

You're brought along to a lot of in person deals

You pick up on things no one else does, remembering the littlest of things that can and will be weaponized if need be

Their kids and spouses names, the way they look at you, how they speak and carry themselves

It doesn't take long for you to know exactly who they are

"They're lying Tom. I know they are."

"How can you tell?"

"They look away when they answer, their eye twitches, and they always lean forward when they're saying something true."

"You got all that from a five minute conversation?"

You're not only their beloved little sibling, but the perfect weapon

They don't teach you how to use a gun, but you've been watching for years, making note of every tiny detail

When you do use a gun, which is inevitable, it's a perfect shot

Arthur and Tom insist you carry something with you, but you're fine sticking with a simple razor

The guns can stay with them. . . .

Not only does it come in handy with work, but your family, too

You pick up on the way Arthur escalates, talking him down before there's a full outburst

You know the nights Tommy does and doesn't sleep just by the sound of his voice, the way he signs his name

You know when to check up on Ada if she's not doing well after Freddies gone, even if no one else can see the hurt in her eyes

That's the thing everyone seems to forget, is that you're not only book smart, but people smart, too

Constantly making fun of your siblings right in front of them

"Pol, y/n's making fun of me!"

"I am not! You don't even speak Russian."

"No, but I can guess."

He'd never admit it to you, but Finn really is amazed by you

Ever since he was a kid he always looked up to you

School and homework and all that never came easy to him, and it lead to him giving up, so the fact that all of this comes so easy makes him proud to be your brother

"Y/n, curse in a language we all know or don't say it all."

Along with learning weapons along the way, you pick up on how to be a nurse, tending to whatever it needed

From your nieces and nephews scraped knees to bullet wounds

"Do not get blood on my new shirt!"

No one really suspects you to be listening or watching the way you do, so when they need it, you go "undercover"

Gaining the trust of the enemy, pretending to be a stranger that just so happens to get their attention as if you hadn't been figuring out what makes them tick, distracting them with drinks and small talk

If anything goes wrong, you picked up on how to get away, how to fight without getting too much attention, and not just by watching

With a memory like yours, there are some things you'd like to forget and can't

A lot of things do leave you with nightmares, with flashes of panic, with this dreadful feeling in your gut like you'd seen it all before

At one point or another you've called your siblings and aunt in the middle of the night, just to check up on them, see if they're okay

Begging your brothers to be more careful

They rarely ever listen though

"Is there anything you can't do?"

"I can't go on a date."

"Nope, not until you're forty."

"Come on Arthur, you can't scare them all away."

Despite all this, you're still treated like a child

Your siblings still see you as that smart little kid correcting their work and growing bored of even the most complicated things

No matter what you do or say, you'll always be small in their eyes

#i got a lil carried away :P #headcanon #peaky blinders #peaky blinders headcanon #thomas shelby #arthur shelby #john shelby #ada shelby #finn shelby #polly gray #ennasfavorites

227 notes · View notes

megs-mostly-past-random-fandoms · 3 years

Text

Spies Can’t Catch Feelings

Based on this request: I haven’t seen any requests for Peaky Blinders yet. Can I request a Tommy Shelby fic where the reader has been kind of like a spy for him and she kinda has feelings for him but also finds herself falling for Alfie too??

Here you are! *Familiar Characters are NOT mine!*

Fandom: Peaky Blinders

Warnings: Angst (no fluff here folks), unrequited feelings, mentions of smoking(it’s Peaky Blinders), mentions of spying and potential death, I think that’s it, but let me know if I missed something.

Pairings/Characters: Tommy Shelby x fem!reader(platonic-ish), Alfie Solomons x fem!reader (platonic-ish)

As soon as you were back home, you let out a sigh. You removed your coat and walked to the parlor, only to scream when you saw someone sitting there. "Bloody hell, Tommy!" you shouted when you realized it was none other than Thomas Shelby sitting in your parlor. "What are you doing here?" you snapped, causing him to raise a brow. He didn't like it when you used that tone, but he'd scared you half to death.

"You haven't rang. I was worried." You let out a snort of laughter. "You don't get worried, Thomas. You want your information. I told you before, when I have anything of note, I'll ring. Other than that, don't come sneaking into my house. Alfie Solomons hasn't lied to you so far. Not from what I've seen. I have free reign of that office. Everything appears legitimate as far as I can tell. At least where you and the Peaky Blinders are concerned."

Tommy rose gracefully from his seat and came over to you. In your personal space. You bit back the happy sigh that threatened to escape you. You couldn't let your feelings be known yet. Not while you were in the thick of things with Alfie. You were Tommy's spy and spies can't catch feelings. Except, you'd had feelings for Tommy long before he ever asked you to spy for him.

"Find whatever you can on him so we can bring you home, Y/N." He placed a hand on your shoulder and gave it a small squeeze. "I'm counting on you." With that, he left you home while your heart threatened to beat out of your chest. He had been so close. Close enough you could smell the gun powder and cigarette smoke on him. His lips had been right there and part of you wanted nothing more than to kiss him. You let yourself get lost in the fantasy for a bit before shaking your head and going about your personal business and going to bed. You had work the next day after all.

You didn't mind working for Alfie. He really was a great employer. Sure, he had a temper, but he never let it loose on you. In fact, he kept you safe from the leering eyes of the other men in his "bakery". He didn't talk often, but once he got going, he was a great person to talk to. He was so intelligent and even funny sometimes. And you had to be honest, sometimes, when he stared at you, his eyes bore into your soul and sent shivers down your spine. But mostly, you were happy being friendly with your current employer.

In fact, you were starting to have second thoughts about spying on him for Tommy. Your mind kept comparing the two of them while your heart bounced between them. You could easily admit that you had feelings for Tommy. You had for a while now. Alfie was a different story. You knew you felt something for him, but you didn't know what. Surely you couldn't be falling for Alfie too. Could you?

*the next day *

"You alright?" You nearly jumped out of your skin when you heard Alfie's voice. You hadn't realized you'd been zoned out. "Sorry. Yeah, I'm fine. Just…lost in thought I guess." You let your gaze meet his and he gave you the closest thing you'd get to a smile from him. "Go on home then. You've done more than enough for today. Get some rest, Miss Y/L/N." You laughed a bit.

"How many times must I ask you to call me Y/N?" He smirked and replied that until you called him Alfie, he'd continue calling you by your last name. You loved the easy banter between the two of you. It brought about a warmth in your chest and butterflies in your stomach that was different from the feeling you got around Tommy.

"Alright, I'll go. But I'll be back bright and early tomorrow. Goodnight, Alfie." You could feel Alfie's eyes on you as you grabbed your handbag and your coat. "Night, Y/N." You smiled and left. Part of you thought about sneaking back later, but the more rational part of you knew that, even if he were up to something nefarious, he wouldn't keep evidence in his business. Not where anyone could see anyway. Based on everything you'd seen and heard, he really wasn't out to get Tommy. So, you ignored that nagging voice and went about your business. As it would happen, that was the wrong thing to do.

Once again, Tommy was in your parlor when you arrived home. Only this time, he was glaring at you with such venom, you nearly shirked away. "What are you doing here, Thomas?" you asked as you removed your coat. Tommy stamped out his cigarette in the ashtray you kept out for him.

"You...lied to me." Your brows furrowed and you tilted your head to the side as you studied his face. Whatever he was talking about was obviously serious. At least to him. "What are you talking about?" Tommy stood, placed a hand in his pocket, and called out, "John. Bring 'im here." You glanced over your shoulder to see John nearly dragging a beat-up Arthur Shelby into the parlor.

"What the hell happened to you?" you asked, moving to help. A glare from John and the sound of Tommy clearing his throat stopped you. "What do you think happened, Y/N?" Tommy asked, "You're a smart girl. You can put two and two together." You whirled around to face him again. "You think Alfie did this?! Are you stupid? Alfie wouldn't do this. He's been honest with you from the beginning, Tommy. This was probably the Italians."

"I sent Arthur to check on your progress this afternoon. That was where it happened. This is Solomons' work. I just can't prove it." You felt your knees shaking as he took a step toward you. "Now, either you didn't know and I can let you off with a slap on the wrist for being stupid. Or you did know and I kill you now before you can betray us again. I just need to know which. So…which is it?"

"I-I don't know anything. I swear. Alfie…he didn't do this as far as I'm concerned." Tommy regarded you for a moment, trying to decided whether or not he believed you. After what seemed like an eternity, he spoke again, "You're protecting him. That's why you've given me nothing these past months. The question is why?" You swore your heart was going to beat right out of your chest.

"I'm not, Tommy. I swear. I haven't done anything to betray you or your family. If Alfie did this, he kept his plan close to the vest. There was never any sign that he would-" You weren't stupid. You knew Alfie would do something like that if provoked, but not out of the blue. But you couldn't tell Tommy that. He'd never believe you.

"You let us down," Tommy said in response, "Do you know what we do to those who betray us?" You narrowed your eyes and tried to fight back tears. You couldn't believe that the man you had been falling in love with was talking to you like this. "Don't you dare threaten me, Thomas Shelby. I did NOT betray you, but God knows I wish I had now!" Tommy's usually stoic mask twisted into an expression of rage.

"We're leaving. But know this, if I ever lay eyes on you again," he began, pulling a bullet out of his pocket, "I will put this bullet right in your heart." You clenched your fists at your sides. Your heart was breaking and you wanted to slap yourself at your own foolishness. How could ever think Tommy would love you? The man had no heart.

Taking a deep breath, you stared Tommy directly in his eyes and said, "And if I ever see you again, I'll put one between your eyes. Now, get out." Your entire body was shaking as the three men left your home. As soon as the door closed behind them, you sank to your knees on the plush carpet and let yourself cry. How had things gone so badly so suddenly? The only good thing was that it was over. Well, almost. Now, you needed to resign from Alfie's bakery before he found out everything.

The next morning, you were in Alfie's office first thing. He stared at you with those eyes and you almost couldn't speak. "Resignation?" he asked and you nodded. Once again, you were fighting back tears. You just couldn’t understand how you had been so stupid, falling in love with not one, but two notorious criminals. That was why spies couldn't catch feelings. It never worked out. You knew that. Too bad your heart hadn't. "Y-Yes. I think it's for the best." You turned to leave. When your hand was on the knob, Alfie spoke up again.

"This is about Tommy Shelby, ain't it? About the job he asked you to do?" You froze instantly as fear gripped you. You turned slowly to meet his gaze once more. "I beg your pardon?" Alfie sat back in his chair with a slight grunt. "Tommy Shelby sent you here." You let go of the knob and turned back to him with your head down.

"Yes. How long have you known?" Alfie leaned forward again, resting his elbows on his desk, but you could still feel his eyes on you. "Since Arthur Shelby came poking around yesterday." Your head shot up. "Did you do that to him?" Alfie sighed. "That, pet, was an unfortunate accident, weren't it? He stumbled into something he wasn't supposed to. If I hadn't done it, Sabini and his men would've killed him."

"I didn't tell them anything!" you suddenly cried before slapping your hands over your mouth. Alfie stared at you for a second then, he began laughing. "I know, pet. Not that you could've. There's nothing to tell, is there? I didn't betray Tommy. Neither did you." You scoffed and rolled your eyes. "Tell that to him. He thinks I did and that I'm protecting you. Threatened to shoot me." Alfie's brows drew together. "Now why would he think that?"

"Maybe because I'm falling in love with you and too stupid to hide it." Your eyes widened as Alfie took in your surprise admission. "I, uh, I-nevermind. I need to leave now before I embarrass myself further." With that, you threw open the door and ran from Alfie, cursing yourself all the way home. You didn't know what was going to happen next, but you were almost certain neither of the men you had feelings for were going to be a part of your life anymore.

(a/n: I hope you enjoy it!)

#peaky blinders #thomas shelby #tommy shelby #thomas shelby x reader #alfie solomons #alfie solomons x reader #tommy x reader #alfie x reader

131 notes · View notes

quothethemenevermore · 3 years

Text

@cuddlecave I don't normally tag people when I post fics but this was based off an ask you got a while back, I hope you like it!

Warning: this does contain fearplay, unwilling vore and a few mentions of death. The vore itself is safe, though.

Every time.

Every time they tried to talk to Gordon, it always ended like this. Him getting angry, then them getting angry. He didn't understand their sweet voice, didn't understand some of the things they did, but that wasn't a reason to be angry.

Why was he angry all the time!?

It started out as another joke turned argument that left Benrey sulking, away from the group while they rested. At this point, they were pretty close to Xen. It wouldn't be long before they would go through the portal, see Benrey at their full height, and..

Knowing Gordon, if they didn't start getting along like, yesterday, he'll attack them. Like he has been.

Since he's gotten that damn gun arm, he's been shooting at them and launching them away, and-

Great, now they're getting angry again.

They blew out a stream of sweet voice, red to blue.

A bloody sea means I'm angry.

As they finished the note, a small idea came to them.

Gordon couldn't understand the sweet voice, and Benrey couldn't understand his emotions. There had to be some kind of compromise. A lot of sweet voice was simply blank until the user feels an intense emotion, so maybe if there was a way to use the blank voice to see into Gordon's emotions…

They could try using blank sweet voice on him, but they'd have to be completely emotionless to do it. They took a deep breath, willing themselves to calm down. They gave the group a look over- all four seemed to be asleep, the oldest scientists huddled away from the other two and Gordon completely separated from the group. Jumping down from the barrel, they made their way over to where the sleeping HEV suit clad human lay slumped against the wall. Crouching down, they summoned what they could of the blank voice, allowing it to escape. There was no sound behind it, and the orbs faded on impact with the suit and hair of the human.

They didn't even change color.

Hm. Did it not work because he was sleeping? Well, maybe they'd just have to try it with him awake, then. They went back to their barrel, glancing at the other three members as they went, ensuring they had stayed asleep.

~~~

Benrey tried a few times to use the blank voice against Gordon since he's awoken, and each time it did the same thing. It didn't take any color or emotion from the scientist, and faded on impact. And for their part, only once did Gordon catch them doing it.

"What are you doing?" He snapped, turning to face them. "Wha?" "What was that? Tommy, what does white mean?" The older scientist looked confused. "Um, white can be- white can mean a lot of different things, Mr. Freeman. What did it look like?"

Benrey chose not to answer, instead frowning at the fact that the blank voice was not working.

"It was kind of transparent, I guess? It faded really quickly. What exactly are you trying to do with that?" And now his questions were directed back to the guard. "I dunno, what are you trying to do?" "I'm trying to go home, man, and you're not helping." "I think that's- that sounds like it's a blank sweet voice! There's no meaning to them." The confusion only increased from there, and Tommy gave Benrey a concerned look over Gordon's shoulder.

Benrey waved it off, looking back to the smaller human as he puzzled out the information. "What- why do you have blank sweet voice? I thought it was for emotions or something like that?" "It doesn't always have to. A lot of sweet voice starts off with- starts as blank, and then changes color when- if the user has a strong emotion."

"Are you all done talking or are we going to have to abandon you? We've been waiting for fucking ever!" Bubby cut in, glaring at the trio from the other side of the room. "We're coming, man, chill out." Gordon yelled back, turning to look at the alien. "Quit blowing sweet voice at me. I don't care if it's blank or not."

"And if I don't?"

They should have seen it coming, but they still jumped slightly when the man offered bullets as an answer, turning and storming towards the group.

Clenching their jaw to keep their neutral expression and hide their anger, they started forming another plan in their head. If the voice was too weak outside to react to Gordon, then maybe, they'll have to bring the human inside.

Would it scare him? Yea, most likely. But at this point, Benrey didn't really care anymore. Looking around that scare is what's important at this point, they're really tired of not knowing why Gordon was being so aggressive.

~~~

They were closer to the Xen portals.

In fact, they were nearing the Lambda labs, the halls mostly intact unlike the main building. Benrey was getting restless.

If they were going to try this, they needed to do it before they got to the labs. There were surviving scientists there, and once they made it there there would be no chance to get Gordon away from them. For now, they were getting ready to take another break, and Benrey saw their chance.

"Hey, feetman." "Do not call me that." He started, hostility already creeping into his tone. "But what is it?" "Something's over there." They pointed to a pile of crates a little ways away from the group. "Wanna go check it out with me?" His eyes narrowed. "And why would I do that? Last time I did anything with you, you got my fucking arm cut off. I'm good, thanks." "What if they're coming to attack the team?"

He tried not to show the conflict on his face as he looked over to the other scientists, all three already settled down and dozing off.

He didn't want to have another ambush situation, for himself or for any of the team. But could Benrey really be trusted after everything that happened so far?

"You stay here. I'll go check it out." The alien shrugged, stepping aside to let Gordon through.

They made sure their footsteps were silent as they followed, giving one last look to the team before following him behind the crates.

Still sleeping, but it would be wise to keep the human quiet. They sized up enough to make it easy to get him down, then crouched to get as close to his level as possible. The brunette was clueless, peering around the side of the crates, gun arm at the ready. When there was nothing there, he swore under his breath. Of course Benrey lied about the threat to make him leave the group.

Wait, why would they try to get him away from the group? He whirled around, ready to go back over there and confront the guard, and halted in his tracks immediately.

He should have figured Benrey would follow him, but this..

The alien was huge, at least twenty feet tall, and the only thing Gordon could really make out in the dark were their eyes, a yellow glow that was a lot closer than he wanted it to be.

Even closer, which he realized too late, was a giant hand. The large fingers wrapped around the human too quickly for him to react, trapping his gun arm to his side and covering his mouth to keep him quiet. The grasp was gentle at first, but his squirming as he caught up to the situation caused it to tighten. Not enough to prevent him breathing, just enough to keep him still.

Unable to move his body, his mind began racing. What could Benrey possibly want with him that would lead to something like this? How was this even possible!? Yea, they said they weren't human before, but he didn't think it was to this extent!

God, they already got his arm cut off, what more could they want?

That thought alone made his breath catch.

Benrey only watched Gordon struggle in their hand for a moment, puzzling out the best way to go about this. The gun arm concerned them the most, but they could probably cocoon it while he was in their mouth, as long as they worked quickly.

Gordon flinched when they heard a low hum, squirming more violently to try and at least free his face. If he could yell for the team, one of them could come save him. With the finger in his way, he could barely see, which made it even more disorienting when his upper half was suddenly surrounded in heat. What happened? Where was he?

He tried to squirm more, feeling the hand slipping away, when something heavy pressed into the chestplate and back of the suit, not just holding him in place but also starting to crack the latches holding the suit together.

Their eyes narrowed when they slipped him up to his ribcage in their mouth. They didn't think about the hev suit before, but now that it was impossible to ignore, they didn't think they could get it down without sizing up more. And if Gordon kept squirming like he was, it was pretty likely he'd damage something.

It had to come off. They'll figure out a way to explain it to the team later. Quickly, they blunted their teeth halfway, allowing the points to start digging into the armor surrounding the human. They had to be careful, they couldn't afford to hurt him right now, but they also needed to go faster. He was getting aware, and they could feel him trying to point his gun somewhere to shoot.

Once they heard the crack of the latches falling apart, they pulled him in far enough to cocoon his gun. They rolled him around, dislodging the now unattached armor pieces and forcing them to the front so they could spit them out. Unintentionally, he was helping undo the armor with his squirming. He was shouting, but Benrey wouldn't focus on it. They knew what it would be and they knew it would make them stop.

It didn't take long after the suit started cracking for Gordon to figure out where he was. The humid heat, the pressure on the suit, the darkness- there was only one place that he could be. He started screaming, yelling for Benrey to let him go, or anyone to help. When that didn't immediately work, he tried to remember where he was in relation to the giant alien eating him, tried to aim his gun up to shoot them in the eyes, or just in the head. He squirmed more frantically when his suit finally succumbed to the pressure with a loud crack, suddenly being drawn further inside. The floor beneath him lifted and he rolled to the side, the chestplate staying where it had last been. His gun landed in a puddle that seemed more sticky than the saliva around him- a thought that made him cringe in disgust, and he aimed his gun to the roof of the mouth and clenched his nonexistent fist.

Nothing. The gun clicked a few times, but something had jammed the barrel.

Sweet voice.

Before he could even come to terms with being completely defenseless, he was flipped around again, this time losing the back of the armor, leaving his torso completely bare. For a split second, he imagined getting severed on Benrey's teeth- he'd seen them before, sharp like a razor, he'd be nothing hard to bite through armorless- and his panic increased tenfold. He was back to screaming, flailing out and hitting at whatever he could. His leg got caught between two teeth, tongue curling around him to hold him still and he paled, expecting the worst- he already knew what to expect, the pain would be unbearable, but maybe it would be quick with how big those teeth are- and his legs armor was promptly shredded off as he was dragged backwards.

His breath stuttered as he tried to comprehend that his leg was still there, as the other one was put through the same treatment. Through his panic, he couldn't see it, but they were being.. surprisingly gentle.

Their tongue pressed insistently at his arm, either trying to push the armor pieces off or push his arm to their teeth to pull the armor off that way. He tried to pull it away, swearing at the alien again, and when that failed his entire body was shoved forward.

Trying to maneuver the human with their tongue alone was an almost impossible feat. He was dead set on making this as hard as possible, wasn't he? The thought annoyed them, and before they could stop it they growled lowly. It was enough to make the human pause their struggling, and this time they succeeded in getting their arm in position to strip the armor off of it. They tried to ignore the shaking.

They forced themselves to focus.

There was no more armor in the way, the gun was jammed with sweet voice, it was just the human alone now. There was no reason they can't get an accurate reading on his emotions now. He was scared right now, yea, but surely that wouldn't get in the way of reading his other emotions, right? It shouldn't, at least.

So with nothing else in the way, they tipped their head back and swallowed.

Everything stopped after the armor had been stripped from his arm, his body laying limp on their tongue. His breath was still stuttering, despite his best attempts. How was he to calm down in a situation like this? Even if Benrey decided to let him go, he was defenseless now. No armor to save him from the electric shocks from the pepper puppies or the headcrabs. Who knew how long their sweet voice would last, too?

He was well and truly caught.

A small part of him had hoped it would be a joke, a malicious prank, but then he was slipping backwards and that hope shattered abruptly. He didn't even have time to try to plead with the entity before his legs were ensnared, and the rest of him followed immediately after.

The trip down was short, Gordon knew that, but with the muscles around him squeezing the air from his lungs, it felt like hours. He almost compared it to drowning- and just as quickly tried to diminish the thought. Thinking about other ways to die wasn't really helping him here, was it? If he had the air to do so, a bitter laugh might have escaped him at that.

Drowning had to have been better than what he was about to experience, that was for sure. Panicked tears continued escaping his eyes, getting picked up by the flesh around him as he continued down.

Over the static-like fear in his mind, he could faintly make out a steady heart beat, maybe faster than one usually would have. Hey, this was a non-human creature, maybe their heart was supposed to beat faster.

It made something in his chest ache, hearing it. It reminded him too much of a stuffed bear he owned as a kid, that had a heartbeat box in it. It used to lull him to sleep every night.

Now a heartbeat was lulling him to death.

His feet hit a closed off space, and as he realized he had stopped moving, the space opened and he slipped through, falling to the floor of the chamber with a small thud.

His surroundings were black- or dark blue, maybe? It was hard to tell for sure, because every surface was covered in a slippery, transparent white slime.

Had he been in a better state of mind, he might have recognized the color as the sweet voice Benrey had been sending his way lately.

As a matter of fact, the puddle he was sitting in was now a brilliant yellowish-green.

Upon seeing it change to the almost sickly color, one he falsely recognized as acid, he finally broke down.

Green like pear means I'm scared

Benrey frowned. That couldn't be the only emotion that the human felt, right? There had to be more. He tried to pry more, sensing whatever he could.

Reddish-brown like dirt means I feel hurt

Dark green to jet means I'm upset

Light brown like a cup of tea means I'm filled with uncertainty.

Before they could even try to think about those, Gordon screamed.

Their eyes snapped wide open, and instinctively they clenched the muscles of the pouch he was in. That made it worse, he was suddenly kicking and hitting everything he could, wailing as if he couldn't form words.

Maybe he couldn't, too shaken up.

Their own breathing started picking up the longer he thrashed around. It was clear to them that he wasn't getting the right amount of air, gasping and choking on both air and tears when he wasn't yelling, and if they didn't get him calmed down soon, he might faint.

They tried pressing at him, holding him still. It couldn't hold him completely still, their tremors still very prominent to the alien.

A new color joined the sweet voice they could sense from him.

Navy blue like the midnight sky means I think I'm gonna-

They couldn't finish the rhyme, completely horrified at the emotion itself.

Did- did Gordon really think they wanted to kill him!? The thought alone made them feel sick, but they tried to stomp it down. Right, they can talk through this after he stops panicking.

"Hey." He flinched sharply against their hand, and they had to fight their own emotions to not start crying.

This wasn't what they thought would happen, they didn't want Gordon scared of them, they just wanted to understand his emotions. Now he was scared-no, terrified of them. He was sobbing, thinking he was going to die. Because of them.

"Hey, calm down please?" He was silent for a moment, and they felt him move, likely to hug himself. "How-" his voice was shot, cracked and raspy and thick with emotion. "How do you expect me to calm down? In here?"

"I-"

"I thought- I thought the arm was enough. Why? Why do you want me dead so bad? And like this? You couldn't just shoot me!?"

More emotions were bleeding through the sweet voice, and God it was starting to overwhelm the poor alien.

Fear, panic, hurt, uncertainty, sorrow, resentment-

"I don't. Uh, want you dead. You're not dead."

"Benrey, I'm literally in your stomach. If you don't let me out soon, I'm gonna-" he choked on a sob. "Let me out. If you don't want me dead, let me go. Please."

"You're not gonna die. Not gonna kill you. You're safe, it's just a sweet voice pouch. Watch." They closed their eyes, ignoring their own emotions and tried to think of calming thoughts.

The sweet voice slime coating the human changed from the greens and browns to a familiar blue, and he could even feel the effects of it.

His fear skyrocketed. Benrey was just calming him down to be an easy meal!

That sharp pear color flooding all of the calming thoughts they had just summoned scared them, truthfully. They didn't think the little human could emote so much, or so strongly.

"Hey, friend. I'm not trying to hurt you." "What are you doing then!? Why won't you let me out if you don't want to hurt me!? You're trying to trick me again!" He was dissolving into sobs again, seemingly unconsolable.

Benrey frowned. Letting him out now means there was a good chance they wouldn't ever get to set things right with him. But nothing else that they've tried was working, and the longer he stayed there, the worse they felt. Reluctantly, they brought their hands to their middle and allowed their torso to split open.

Silence. He knew it, Benrey was just trying to get him quiet so the others wouldn't wake up and see them doing this. They were trying to get off Scot free, and there was a pretty good chance they'd succeed. Knowing the team, they'd just brush his death off and keep going forward. He broke into another sob, moving to bring his knees to his chest.

The wall he had leaned against suddenly split open with an awful ripping sound and he tumbled backwards with a yelp. He sprawled out onto the familiar texture of the giant's hands, though this time they were cupped together, not trying to hold him in place. There was another strange sound as their torso stitched itself back together seamlessly, and he closed his eyes to try and block it out. He forced them open when the sound stopped, looking up to meet the golden eyes from before, this time spilling over with tears and full of sorrow and guilt. He scrambled back, trying to escape the hold, and Benrey didn't try stopping him, lowering their hands to the ground.

He took several steps back from them, aiming their gun arm at the entity. It was still jammed, even more so than before now, but it comforted him. They didn't try to pursue, just staring at his soaked form.

For several long, tense silent moments, green and yellow eyes stared each other down.

Benrey looked down, breaking the eye contact. "'M sorry."

"What?" It had been so soft, he barely heard it. "'M sorry. I didn't want to scare you that bad. Just wanted to understand."

"Understand..? In what fucking world does that help you understand anything!?"

"Was blank voice. It colored to your emotions so I could read them. Thought you'd just be all angry like you always are."

"I'm.." he paused. Did.. Did they really assume he was just furious throughout this entire time?

Through all of the fighting and the lives taken in front of him, or by him..?

"I wasn't really angry, man. Annoyed, yeah, but I-I'm stressed! I'm just trying to make it home alive, keep the team alive, and… I don't want to die here. I can't just come back like you can."

"You're just scared." Benrey affirmed. "'S the biggest thing I could pick up. Didn't know..."

That was another fair point, the arm.

"Didn't know you couldn't respawn. You can't regen either, can you?" Gordon shook his head. "No. So this…" he lifted up the gun arm. "It's gone forever. I don't get it back. God, I'll be lucky to get a proper prosthetic for it after that potion." He laughed, but it was bitter and humorless.

Benrey didn't laugh, nor find it funny. Their shoulders hunched slightly, and a frown seemed to permanently wipe the neutral expression from their face. Neither of them commented on the tears dripping down their face. "'M sorry. They weren't even supposed to take it, just rough you up a lil."

"That still doesn't make it better." Gordon sighed. "Look, I accept the apologies, but you have to understand I can't just forgive and forget this shit. There's no way I can just come back from all this okay."

Still, the thought that, even with their unorthodox method of doing so, Benrey had tried to understand their emotions and their point of view, was.. nice. It was a step in the right direction, at least. "Not yet, anyway. Maybe in the future, if you still don't want to hurt me."

"Nah, pacifist route now. 'M done hurting you. Just wanna be friends."

"Let's start with acquaintances, and see if we can work up from there?"

"Sure, Benrey redemption momense begin." And just like that, they were back to their normal height, a little smaller than the scientist. "Yea. Just.. let's not tell the science team about this. Okay?" "Kay."

Benrey led him off to go find another HEV suit before they finally returned to the group, Tommy already awake and the elders starting to wake up themselves. Thankfully, the brunette didn't mention the duo being gone when he woke up.

"Ah, good morning, Gordon!"

"Mornin', Coomer. We should probably start going."

"Yes, by my calculations we have about an hour before we reach the Lambda labs!"

Benrey looked uneasy at the mention of the labs, and Tommy gave them a comforting smile. To his surprise, however, Gordon gave the alien a worried look.

And later, he wound up pulling them aside and they seemed to talk it out, ending with a pat on the back and the two joining back in seemingly better spirits. Tommy smiled. Whatever had happened when he was asleep seemed to improve the duo's relationship, so who was he to worry?

#hlvoreai #Safe vore #Fear play #Unwilling prey #Non fatal vore #Soft vore #gonna write.. a fluffier sequel

42 notes · View notes

vostokovasmelina · 4 years

Text

loyalty.

for anonymous.

pairing: tommy shelby x fem!reader

word count: 1.6k+

warning: this starts out slightly smutty, so don’t be too surprised; also a little bit of death and a whole lot of messy writing

request: Can you write something for Thomas with #3 of the fluff list and #2 of the angst list with the reader being kimbers younger sister and Tommy heavily falling for her but the Shelbys are against it and want to talk him out of it but she's the one who kills Kimber in order to stop the war between them and the shelbys and they realizes she's good for him

prompts:

fluff #3 - “I think I’m in love with you.”

angst #2 - “Please, don’t go out that door.”

a/n: i know this was requested for the blurb week but it’s too long and i like this idea too much to only write a blurb, so here it goes; my brain is also struggling to function properly, therefore this is trash but i gave up trying a long time ago

His hand was resting lazily on your stomach, weighing it down just the right amount to call it pleasant. You could feel the warmth of his hand, the perfect contrast of the cold tips of his toes tickling your feet. You let out a silent sigh and turned your head towards him slowly, fingers trailing unrecognisable patterns on the back of his hand. Your heart jumped up into your throat at the sight of him- so raw, so human as he was sleeping soundly in your bed, under your blankets, next to you, his body warming yours all night long. Oh how you wished the morning hadn’t come so early, the time for goodbyes hadn’t approached so rapidly. You wanted this moment to last forever, you wanted Thomas Shelby to stay in your bed and never leave it again.

You were watching as he blinked his dreams away and laid his gaze on you, a soft smile lingering in the corner of his mouth. You shifted closer under his arm and he pulled you towards himself, his left hand grabbing the soft skin right above your butt with the right amount of force. Tommy pulled you on top of himself and you obliged as his right hand traced its way up your spine, awakening goosebumps everywhere they went and delicate fingers finally arrived at the back of your neck to tug gently but with passion at your H/C locks. You leaned down and your lips crashed with unappeasable hunger on both sides, yours parting just slightly to give way to your tongue into Tommy’s mouth. He let out a throaty groan as you positioned yourself on his bare thighs, your soft skin getting close enough to his crotch to tease him and you pulled away just enough to give space to a playful smile creeping its way onto your face.

“I think I’m in love with you,” Tommy mumbled into your open mouth right before biting down on your bottom lip and now it was your turn to moan and his to smirk.

“Yeah? What would your family say, Mr Shelby?” You teased, your grip on his throat tightening just enough to make his breathing a tad more audible and his eyes filled with lust as he raised his glance at your ruffled hair and parted lips. Right before you could lean back down, Tommy grabbed your waist with both hands and threw you on your back, earning a surprised gasp from you as he climbed on top of you, his weight pushing you into the mattress. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, peppering your soft skin with gentle kisses before leaning in to whisper in your ear.

“Who the fuck cares what they’d say?” He finally replied, making you grin and you could’ve sworn you had found your place among the stars when Tommy kissed your lips as if his life depended on it.

However, deep down, you knew that you cared and you knew that no matter what he had said, Tommy cared, too. After all, you were the member of the Shelbys’ biggest rival clan and it didn’t matter that it was practically only your name linking you to the Kimbers. It also didn’t matter that you were neutral to all their businesses and didn’t even know the details of any of them- all the Shelbys heard was your surname and it was enough for them to paint a picture of you. A picture they would definitely not make a part of their collection. And no matter how hard Tommy had been trying to make them accept you and believe you when you said you didn’t share your brother’s views, they stayed entirely uncompromising. You didn’t even ask them to fully lay their trust in you- you simply wanted the Shelbys to accept the fact that he clearly loved you and you loved him and to leave you and Tommy alone.

You even accidentally eardropped on one of Polly and Tom’s conversation about the topic when the older woman thought they were alone. It was more like a monologue than a proper conversation, really, and most of it was Polly Gray accusing you of crimes you had never committed even in your wildest dreams. She seemed so eager to remove you from her nephew’s side that you just knew she had already made up a horrifying backstory to scare Tommy away and would have used it against you if you hadn’t cleared your throat behind her. That was the moment the pair of Shelbys realised you had heard everything.

Tommy’s gaze softened as he spotted you, only to turn cold again when you sent him a sad smile, picking your coat from the hanger and nodding at Polly who simply frowned at you in return. Your boyfriend pushed himself up and out of the chair and called out for you right before you could turn the doorknob.

“Y/N! Please, don’t go out that door,” he pleaded, finding himself exactly in the middle between you and his aunt. You shot him one last regretful glance before turning and stepping out into the cold Birmingham night, but Tom had already made up his mind and his aunt wasn’t enough to stop him from following you, choosing you over peace in his family. And you might have been the happiest person alive when Tommy pulled you into himself from behind and accompanied you home that night, but it also meant that you would have to put up with your own family’s bullshit as well. You were not easily intimidated by your brother’s methods, but you were sick to the stomach of always having to hide the man you loved from his men in order to not get Tom killed.

As he placed one last kiss on your lips and slipped out of bed to get dressed, you turned on your side to watch him doing so, trying to enjoy your final moments together that day. You swallowed hard to get rid of the bittersweet taste in your mouth but the closer you got to the moment Tommy would leave, the harder it got to ignore your feelings. It was exceptionally difficult to say goodbye to him now that you knew where he was off to.

“Are you sure guns should be involved?” You questioned, your gaze following his every movement.

“This is a question you should be asking your brother,” Tommy murmured, tying his shoelaces and putting on his peaked hat, offering you his hand one last time. You hesitated before taking it and let him pull you out of your warm and messy bed and into his embrace. “I can take care of myself. And there won’t be blood shed if we can talk it out,” he promised, raising your hands to his lips to shower them with soft kisses.

“Oh, I know that. It’s my brother’s intentions I’m worried about,” you added, leaning your forehead against your boyfriend’s, inhaling his familiar scent deeply as if you were trying to engrave it into your memories.

“I’ll take care of him,” he whispered to you, his voice hardly audible. Little did he know that you had already decided you’d take care of your brother yourself.

Tommy didn’t take his eyes off of you the whole time while they took your brother’s lifeless body away, his blood leaving a long trail behind him. When you appeared with the gun already cocked in your hand, Thomas was going to jump in and pull his own trigger, protecting you from your family’s wrath and revenge. However, you were determined and you were going to go through with it, not even Tom being able to stop you. And even after you had seen the bullet from the gun in your hand break its way into your brothers skull, you felt nothing even close to regret. He had pushed you away a long time ago and was only a shadow of the person you remembered him to be once, so it almost felt like killing a stranger, a rival even. But as easy as pulling the trigger was, recovering from the shock your first kill had caused you seemed to be a rather difficult task.

Tommy finally approached you and turned you away from the sight of your dead brother, burying your face in his chest and ordering the Peaky Blinders to deal with your family, so they wouldn’t get the chance to take their revenge. You gripped Tom’s shirt, the smooth material wrinkling between your fingers and his own slender ones sent shivers down your spine as they traced their way through your hair.

“Why did you do that?” You heard him whisper in your ear, not quite believing that any of this had just happened. Tommy couldn’t help but blame himself for letting you do the dirty work, his dirty work, for not stepping in sooner and stopping you from dipping your hands in your brother’s blood. He had never wanted for you to get a taste of this life, because once you had, there was no going back.

You finally pushed him away from you so you could look around freely, searching for any of your family members hiding somewhere and waiting for the perfect moment to put a bullet through your head. However, you could only see the Peaky Blinders standing in a messy circle around you, all of them looking you up and down as if you were the oddest creature they had ever seen.

“What the fuck?” You heard John yell from behind you but the only thing you cared about at that moment was Tommy’s pale blue eyes piercing into your tired E/C ones and his lips slightly parted in a failed attempt to say something. You offered him an exhausted smile, one that was mostly visible in the corner of your eyes and took his hands gently in yours.

“It was time I had shown loyalty.”

545 notes · View notes

votederpycausemufins · 3 years

Text

*arrives with a cup of hot cocoa instead of coffee* oh hey, you know you guys have been waiting long enough. Here’s the captain. Just ignore the Mumbo in the background having a crisis

@petrichormeraki

Grian regretted going through the portal almost immediately as a wave of nausea hit him. “Are you okay mister grain?” he gave a weak laugh at Crumb already figuring out that nickname.

“Yeah, just didn’t expect this place to be so charged with Vault God energy. Oof, no wonder I can’t remember anything. Can you try sending a message to Tommy?”

“Ye ye ye!” Crumb replied before tapping away at her own communicator. She stopped, jumping as someone wearing a white mask with a black symbol on it landed in front of them.

“Heyyyy!” Grian pointed finger guns at the Watcher that landed in front of him.

“Xelqua. What are you doing here?”

Grian frowned, recognizing the voice. “Ugh, Lynn… Look, I’m just here for my family and a friend of Tommy’s. I didn’t know it was going to be this bad.” He fumbled as Lynn threw an identical mask to the one she was wearing to him. He put it on and felt relief as it helped stabilize him a bit, though he could feel it activating his Watcher powers further. “If you know where they are, I can be on my way.”

“Fine, try not to take too long.” She gave Grian some directions before leaving.

Grian went to pick up Crumb, but found her looking a little scared. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Well, when me and Tubbox was getting flown away by the big bird, it made a portal dat looks like dat.” She pointed at Grian’s mask.

“Oh, yeah that bird was probably me. It was very much on accident though as you can see that is not happening this time.”

Crumb stared at him, half surprised, half skeptical, but mostly confused. “Are you a shape shifter like me den?”

Grian chuckled. “Nope, just an avian. Okay maybe not just. I was born an avian and then made into a Watcher, and to show off power they get wicked cool forms that sort of reflect who they are. Since a good number of Watchers are human based in origin, they basically turn into what people think of as angels. That’s… actually probably where those came from.” Grian shrugged. “Eh, who knows, it was who knows how long ago. Let’s just go find your friends.”

When Grian walked into the building Tommy was hiding out in, he got stabbed. He knew that it made sense, but he couldn’t help but look down at the sword. “Ugh, not again.”

His voice seemed to help the others figure out who he was. “Grian?”

“Hi Tommy! Sorry if I scared you. It’s just I kinda need to wear this mask or else I’ll feel sick and drunk at the same time or something.”

“Tommy an’ Tubbox!” Crumb jumped at the pair when she saw them, shifting to a hybrid form midair and then hugging them.

“Crumb!” Tubbo hugged her first. “Are you doing okay?”

“Ye ye ye!”

“Everything should be okay here soon guys. I’ve got some friends who are definitely going to take care of Dream for you guys once and for all. At the same time, I talked and we’re really going to make a permanent connection between here and Hermitcraft so you can visit all the time. Admin duties will be shared between the servers, but X said he won’t step on any toes, it’s just as a precaution.”

Tommy crossed his arms. “And what are you doing about your boyfriend?”

Grian hesitated at the lack of Tommy using Mumbo’s name. “You mean Mumbo? I mean, he’s a disgusting mess after barely sleeping and eating taking care of me, but I’m sure he’ll get better. Unless you’re concerned about how he was after being here, because again, bit of a mess but he’ll be fine.”

“Not going to get upset at me coming back?”

That really made Grian pause. What was Tommy talking about? “What do you mean Tommy?”

Tommy didn’t respond, just getting so angry he could barely say anything, so Tubbo answered for him. “Just before Mumbo left with you, he yelled at Tommy. He sort of said he wished Tommy never showed up in your world.”

Grian frowned. “Well, you’re fine to come back. I’ll make sure he has a stern talking to. Come on, let’s go back to the portal.” Grian then looked over where Techno and Philza were playing a game of… well Grian wasn’t sure, but it looked like some kind of board game. “You can come too if you want.”

Philza shook his head. “No. Whatever Dream did turned Wilbur back into a ghost, so someone showed up and took him away to fix that. We’re going to wait here until he’s back to normal.”

“Oh, alright then. Well, don’t be a stranger or anything. C’mon kids!”

“Hey! I’m not a kid!” Tommy complained, just making Grian ruffle his hair.

“Were it not for the laws of this land, that being you’re literally my brother, I might have adopted you. Also if we maybe had a few more years between us.”

Grian dropped off the trio at Tommy’s tower before flying to Mumbo’s base. He set his mask down on a table and then walked to where Mumbo’s bedroom was, surprised to hear the shower still running as he passed the bathroom. Grian paused and knocked on the door. “Mumbo, when you’re done in there, we need to have a chat. I’ll be waiting by the counter.”

Grian sat down on the ledge in front of the life counter of Mumbo’s base after feeding it an apple. He stared out at the jungle, waiting for Mumbo to arrive. He finally heard the redstone walk up behind him and then started to address him. “Mumbo, look. Tommy told me you-” He turned to look at Mumbo who was dripping wet. It was like someone pushed him into a pool while he was wearing his suit. “Mumbo why are you all wet?”

“You said to take a shower.” Mumbo said like how he currently looked was the most normal thing in the world.

“I didn’t mean in your clothes! Oh my god, go get changed!”

“I thought you wanted to talk?”

“We can do that after you’re dry!”

Mumbo was quiet before speaking again. “You know I don’t really have another suit.”

“You have your bamboo one!”

Again, he was quiet for a worryingly long time before he just sat down next to Grian. “Can we just talk and get this over with?”

Grian was reluctant and nodded. “Tommy said you yelled at him.”

“I know… I was upset. A lot of things had just happened and with everyone with amnesia, I was really the only one who was able to do much. And Dream had messed with you so I was angry. I barely got to sleep, and we had just had a war with that guy and we were all over the place and I just sort of… lost it.” Mumbo started to lean on Grian’s shoulder, but quickly stopped himself. “Through all this, you’ve been focused a lot on Tommy and your family, and everything else, but you weren’t really…”

“Oh Mumbo. Why didn’t you say anything?” Grian realized what Mumbo meant.

“Well, I sort of knew Tommy was sort of the priority. Plus you had a lot on your plate. I didn’t want to put more on there.”

Grian nuzzled against Mumbo’s chest, not noticing how he stiffened up. “Mumbo, I’m not going to stop loving you. I’m just going to have love for my family too. You know how we hermits need to be there for each other, and Tommy is a hermit too.”

“Yeah…”

When their comms buzzed, Mumbo gave a small sigh as Grian sat up to look at the message. He saw there were actually a few he had missed and laughed a little at them. “Looks like Crumb’s dad is looking for her but he was told he’s at my mansion. I’m going to fly over there and take him to Tommy’s tower since that’s where I left them. If you want we can talk more later.”

“Go deal with them first. And can you tell Tommy what I said?”

Grian nodded and then flew off to his mansion. He quickly arrived since it wasn’t too far even on foot. “Hellooo? Crumb’s dad? You in here?” He called out before spotting an unfamiliar man. “Oh, hey there. Sorry that Crumb’s not here. She’s actually at Tommy’s tower. I can take you there if you want.” Grian stood there as the man in front of him stayed quiet with his back turned to the avian. “Uh, hello?” He then put a hand on the man’s shoulder.

Sparklez jumped slightly, shocked out of his train of thought before he whirled around and saw Grian.

“Hi! Sorry if I scared you. Crumb’s not here, but I can take you to her.”

“Is… Do you live here?”

Grian nodded. He must not have seen many of the other bases. “Yup! Built the mansion myself. Why?”

Grian’s eyes widened as the man held up a lost child poster. “Where did you get this?”

“Uh, that’s from my old world. The kid’s not mine though. Just sort of-”

Grian was cut off by Sparklez. “I know he’s not your kid. He’s mine!”

“Oh my god you’re the captain.”

“Yeah, I am. People don’t normally call me that.”

Grian just grabbed Jordan’s arm. “No, argh! I mean… Tubbo’s here! Your kid is here! They’re with Crumb and Tommy right now.”

“You mean… that kid… with the green shirt, red bandana. That’s him? The whole time that was him?”

“Oh great, looks like you’ve seen him already. That should make things less awkward. Even more of a reason to go over to the tower. Let’s go!” Grian grabbed Sparklez and pulled him over to an ender chest to hand him some spare elytra and rockets. After he had put the wings on, they both got into the air and then flew to the tower.

When they landed, Grian had to hold Jordan back because he looked like he was about to tear the tower apart. “Hey Tommy!” Grian shouted up to the tower. “Are you guys still there?” When the blond called back in affirmation, Grian shouted again. “Can you three come down here? It’s important!”

“Give me a second! I need to grab some more elytra. Hey can you remind me to change the floor 2 elevator to a down tomorrow?”

“We’ll see. Might be busy for us then.”

In a few moments, Tommy was gliding down with Tubbo, Crumb in Tommy’s arms. Crumb was the first to see Sparklez and frowned. “Aw myan… do I have to leave?”

Her dad didn’t answer as he half stumbled towards them and then held Tubbo in a bone crushing hug.

“Ah! What’s going on?” Tubbo, having no context was confused.

Sheepishly, Grian gave the answer. “So remember how you said you went missing when you were little and couldn’t find your dad? I found a missing person’s poster? Well, Crumb’s dad is the one who made that poster… making him your dad too.”

Everything was silent as everyone comprehended the news, Sparklez just holding Tubbo close and not wanting to let go, but finally Tubbo half screamed from being so surprised. “He’s whAT?!”

Mumbo sat in his room, still dripping wet. He knew he could just go sit in front of some lava or stand in the nether for a while if he felt daring, but instead he was just sitting in his room leaving a puddle behind. He wasn’t sure why he set up an ice mirror, but there it was, waiting for him to take his shirt off.

He just stared at himself, trying to will himself to move, but it just wasn’t working. So he tried talking to his mirror self. “Alright Mumbo. Stop acting like a spoon and just look. It’s going to be there. He was lying and Grian seemed fine when he left. They’re supposed to stay forever. A few years won’t do anything to it.”

Still, Mumbo didn’t move, he just kept staring. “Fine, if that’s how we’re going to do it, I’ll just go ahead!” He closed his eyes and took his tie and jacket off. His hands trembled as he got to the buttons of his dress shirt, but then he steeled himself and undid two of them, pulling his left arm out of the sleeve. There was no hiding it now. He would open his eyes and right there, on the skin just under his clavicle, Mumbo would see it.

The redstoner took a deep breath and opened his eyes, looking into the mirror. He was staring at his face and now where he should, but it was hard to look away. No, he told himself. He had to look and put this all past him. He shifted his gaze and his heart dropped. It was gone, like it had never been there at all.

#hermit!tommy #hermit!tommy au #tommyinnit #grian #grian xelqua #watcher!grian #avian!grian #tubbo #crumbl #cuptoast #mumbo jumbo #vault god!mumbo #captain sparklez #grumbo

56 notes · View notes

evienyx · 3 years

Note

lmao seems like you're becoming an mcyt blogger too. anyway i was wondering what are your thoughts on wilbur??? like the character, i mean

I’m expanding my horizons. I’m an incredibly versatile person.

Anyway, you want my thoughts on Wilbur? Oh, I can give you my thoughts on Wilbur.

First off, I would say that, as a character, Wilbur is probably my second favorite, right behind Techno. My favorites tend to differ from the norm, largely because of the fact that I’m a writer, and I look at everything with a bit of a different lense. Even subconsciously, the first time I watch the streams, I’m analyzing the story and the characters, thinking of ways it could have been improved, and admiring what’s done well.

And, damn, Wilbur’s character is done so well.

His descent into madness was, obviously, terrifying to see, but what’s most interesting about it to me is the fact that he feels so justified throughout it. His character is consistent, and what he wants is also consistent. Wilbur stated in his conversation to Phil that he’s come back multiple times to the button, that he’s almost pressed it so many times. Just that statement, the realization of how many times he’s come close to it, despite everything he’s said to Tommy, despite the way he’s been seemingly all for the revolution now,is terrifying. It’s seemed to us for quite a while now that, through the madness, through the insanity, he does believe that L’Manburg can be taken back.

It’s at this moment, though, in the button room, that the truth slowly dawns. All this time, Wilbur did believe that they could take L’Manburg back.

And, all this time, that hasn’t mattered in the slightest to him.

Win or lose, live or die, Wilbur was going to press that button.

If we ignore the fact that the button was a Chekhov’s gun, if we fully analyze this in character, it’s absolutely groundbreaking.

Because here we see a man who once would have done anything to save L’Manburg, now doing anything to destroy it.

One of the ways Wilbur’s arc over the last few months of story (since the election) can be well-represented is, in my opinion, through observation of his relationship and interactions with Tommy.

More specifically, though, in the way that he uses his power over Tommy, what value he places on Tommy’s wellbeing, and how Tommy views him.

At the L’Manburg election, they’re thick as thieves. They’re brothers, at that point, because in this household we roll with SBI family dynamics. Tommy looks to Wilbur for guidance, and when they lose the election and Schlatt exiles them, they run together. Wilbur calls for Tommy to run, they make sure the other is safe (ignore Wilbur’s death, lmao). They leave L’Manburg together.

When they start Pogtopia, when they start thinking about how they’re going to get their country back, Wilbur tries to cheer Tommy up. He jokes with him, references Tubbox. They brainstorm together, they share ideas. They plan, and they work as equals. Wilbur has Tommy drop the ‘President.’ They’re in this together, and one of them is not above the other, anymore. Wilbur does his best to make sure that Tommy is safe, and that he is as happy as possible in the current situation, despite how dark and dreary their prospects appear to be.

Skip forward a bit, and we come to the announcement of the Manburg Festival. Now, up until this point, the dynamics have been rather consistent since the election. We’ve seen Wilbur rise up and take charge a bit more when necessary, like with Tubbo and the whole double-agent business, but ideas are shared and they treat each other with both respect and love.

When Schlatt is making the announcement, with Wilbur and Tommy looking on from above, Tommy draws back his bow to take the president out, and Wilbur stops him. Tommy listens. Had the roles been reversed, this would not have occurred, but mostly because Tommy wouldn’t have questioned Wilbur’s judgement in the first place. Tommy has complete and utter faith in Wilbur and his decisions at this point. That is the power that Wilbur holds over Tommy. Tommy trusts him. Wilbur uses this power over Tommy to ensure that the outcome of each and every decision they make is optimal, and to make sure that both of them stay safe and the rebellion stays strong. It’s a relationship of faith and trust.

Then, though, the announcement of the festival. And, mainly, the aftermath of the announcement. As they walk through the forest, for the first time, we see Wilbur question his motives. We’ve never seen this before, and neither has Tommy. Wilbur wonders if his morals are correct, or if he’s just been assuming he’s in the right. He decides to be the bad guy, and the relationship with Tommy shifts. The trust and faith that Tommy places in Wilbur is turned right back on him as Wilbur tells Tommy that he’ll never be president. Wilbur uses the relationship that he has with Tommy, uses the subconscious trust Tommy places in him, to manipulate him.

At this point, they are no longer equals. Wilbur no longer values Tommy’s input, as Tommy isn’t on his side on this issue, and Tommy doesn’t share with Wilbur anymore, as the faith is gone. Still, Tommy continues to trust Wilbur, he just doesn’t have faith in him or believe that he’s doing the right thing. Additionally, Wilbur’s care for Tommy’s wellbeing deteriorates a bit, but he still does care. Just... not as much.

The next big shift would be the day of the Manburg Festival.

What is interesting about this day is that it is the one time that Wilbur and Tommy agree on whether or not to blow up Manburg, because, as Tubbo is executed by their ally in a shower of colorful sparks, Tommy calls for Wilbur to blow the place to smithereens. Wilbur’s failure here is one of the best things for the story, but we can talk about that another time.

While the dynamics don’t shift in any notable way at the festival, what with Tommy and Wilbur showing up together, fighting and working together, they do change dramatically after the festival is over.

We can see this mainly with two events: The Pit, and Tommy, Tubbo, and Niki’s talk.

Wilbur is the one who coaxes Tommy into fighting Techno (a fight that, logically, Wilbur knew Tommy would lose). He pushed at Tommy’s emotions, manipulated him, into fighting a battle that he had no hope of winning. Any care he had for Tommy’s wellbeing is out the window at this point. He willingly sent him into the Pit to die.

Additionally, this is the first time that Tommy explains that he isn’t fighting for Wilbur anymore. He fights not for Wilbur, but for vengeance for Tubbo in the pit, and when he talks with Tubbo and Niki, it becomes clear that he no longer has faith in nor trusts Wilbur.

The next turning point comes very soon, when Wilbur is in the button room with Tommy and Quackity.

Tommy convinces Wilbur not to press the button, and Wilbur says that he’ll trust in Tommy for now, and breaks the button down as well.

The thing about this that is most important is that Wilbur is lying, and Tommy doesn’t realize that until it is far too late.

We don’t realize this until much later, but Wilbur didn’t care about what Tommy said. He explained to Phil that, despite his words to Tommy, despite what he claims about trusting Tommy’s plan, he’s still come close to pressing the button again, and again. He doesn’t trust in Tommy’s plan, and even if he does, it doesn’t matter, because Wilbur doesn’t care. He’s going to press that button regardless.

What does come from this, though, is that Tommy begins to trust Wilbur again. He feels like Wilbur cares, like Wilbur has his back. He places Wilbur back as leader, in his mind, and all of these things come to a climax on the day of the battle between Manburg and Pogtopia.

The War for L’Manburg shows the two of them relatively trusting of one another on the field, despite Wilbur’s constant jokes about being the traitor (which we later find out to be true, but that’s not what this is about). Tommy trusts Wilbur on the battlefield, and listens to what he says. They fight together.

Wilbur then places Schlatt’s life into Tommy’s hands. He gives him an incredibly difficult decision to make, plays with Schlatt’s life just to rise conflict within Tommy. It doesn’t matter in the end, but I thought it was interesting to see.

Anyway, Wilbur then places Tommy as president-elect, while Wilbur plans to go and detonate the bombs beneath the country while Tommy speaks of plans to rebuild. Then, though, Tommy calls Wilbur president again, and Wilbur renames the country before passing it off to Tubbo.

Wilbur had called Tommy up to the podium to speak, right where a large part of the bombs were placed. His intent was for Tommy to speak there while Wilbur pressed the button and blew the country sky-high, with Tommy at the center of it all.

Any care Wilbur once had for Tommy’s wellbeing is gone, and nothing makes that more apparent than his attempted appointment of Tommy to the presidency, where he would have been in the most danger as he gave a speech while standing on a minefield, facing a crowd containing a man who lived only for chaos and another who vowed to watch the country burn to the ground along with any government that may wish to form.

We can see, as well, the moment Tommy realizes what’s going to happen. We can see when he begins calling for people to find Wilbur, muttering “no” as he searches desperately, and then screaming as his worst fears are realized and his brother Wilbur blows everything that he’s ever worked for into nothing more than a crater.

Wilbur’s character development, his arc, his consistency, is incredible to watch. It’s one of the most impressive things of the entire Dream SMP story (which, honestly, isn’t much of a surprise, since Wilbur’s been directing it this whole time, anyway). There are so many more things that I could say about this, but this post is long enough, so I’m gonna end it here.

I’m always up to rambling about Dream SMP things, especially analyzing characters, plot, motivations, and the like.

I’m a nerd, sue me.

122 notes · View notes

applsauss · 3 years

Text

Lightning Bugs in July | II

GUNNER AND BUG

Description: You were christened ‘Bug’ by Beth and ‘Gunner’ by your pals. Those are the names that define you.

Fandom: Band of Brothers

 Pairing:  Joseph Toye/Reader

Word Count:  5.9k+

Warning(s): Derogatory Language. Nothing you wouldn’t see in the show.

“What did they call you?”

Em’s question was so innocent.

You were called ‘Bug’ once, when you’d run barefoot through the grass, catching lightning bugs with your bare hands in the sleepy twilight.

Beth was younger, then. So were you. She would call after you from the porch: “Buggy! Come in. It’s getting late!”

You existed in a world without war for so long, why can’t you exist there once more? Why is it so hard to stand back on that beach and live in it the way it was, the way you once were?

There were lightning bugs, then, over the Potomac. They flashed like they wanted to remind you of everything good still left in the world.

“Were you a good machine gunner?”

They called you ‘Gunner’ once. You used to take pride in that name, then you learned to accept it for what it was: A fact, something that’s definition just meant you, something that was yours.

They would call after you, in a firefight, in the quiet often that followed one:

“Gunner!”

Wars seem never-ending when you’re in the middle of one.

You are shaking in a foxhole. Dirt falls over your head and shoulders the farther you press your back into the wall behind you, and your machine gun is steaming above you. These are unimportant details. Mostly, you are staring at your bloody hands.

Something drips down the side of your face like a shiver. Your chest rises and falls quickly -- so quickly -- you can't control it. Mostly, though, you are staring at the wet blood sticking between your fingers.

"Gunner!"

Where did all this blood come from? You look down at your arm and find that the red is soaking through your uniform as well. Is it yours? Panic flares, cold like dread in your chest, and you can't catch your breath, but you're breathing so quickly -- how can it feel like you're drowning? Is it the blood?

"Gunner!"

There is a loud ringing in your ears, like gnats swarming your head. Are you dying?

"Gunner!"

Someone slides into your foxhole. You suck in a sharp, rattling breath and scramble for your bayonet, but the straps of your webbing are tangled and you can't yank it free. Then a hand settles over yours -- kind in that it is unyielding -- and you realize it's just Joe Toye who's crouched beside you. "Oh, Gunny," he rasps as he sinks to his knees, the edges of him stark against the sky.

"Joe?'

You can barely make out his face in the broad daylight; your vision blurs and drops off to static around the edges. You try and force more words up and from your chest, but your jumbled mind won't let any thoughts stick. Slowly, Joe wraps his arms around you and brings you to his chest.

"Are you hurt?"

The question confuses you. You don't have an immediate answer. You turn your face into Joe's chest, nose pressed to his jacket, and beneath all the shellfire and hellfire, the air around Joe Toye tastes like Lucky strikes on your tongue.

“I don’t know.”

“Where’s Lieb?”

"I don't know." You find yourself struggling to hold down the urge to cry. You wrestle with it on the floor of your mind, bat at its hands and squeeze its neck. Joe cradles your head and begins rocking back and forth.

"It's alright. You're alright. You're looking fine, Gunner--"

"Oh, dear God--"

Someone else is at the lip of the foxhole, the familiar shadow of a friend cast over you.

"Go get the doc."

You barely recognize Eugene Roe when he slips down the wall of your foxhole. He has the pallid face of an angel, his halo, the red cross on his helmet.

Joe's voice rumbles in his chest like a beloved wave of thunder. "You're gonna be fine, huh, Gunner?"

"Huh, Gunner?

"Huh, Gunner?"

Does he know what your name means to you?

You were called 'Bug' once, when you ran barefoot through the grass chasing lightning bugs.

You never liked your first name because it was given to you by your mother, who didn’t, and still doesn’t, know you. You were christened ‘Bug’ by Beth and ‘Gunner’ by your pals. Those are the names that define you.

When you close your eyes, you urge yourself to remember that beach, that twilight, that last moment of peace you stole before you waded deeper and let the current of war sweep you under, tear you away from whatever simpler life you might have lead if you'd never joined up and shipped off, shot and been shot, dug into the earth and understood intimately the way it shivers during an artillery barrage.

This is one thing you know for certain: Your name belongs to you the same as it is you, who you are.

What did they call you?

Gunner. Because it's what you call a machine gunner. A good one.

Joe sets your helmet on your head; You forgot when you took it off in the first place. A hand appears in front of your face; Skip Muck is staring down at you grimly as he hoists you up and over the edge of the foxhole.

The sun in France is soft like velvet, and with the eclipsing of spring comes a fresh summer breeze. The air rushes over your skin, caressing your face like a lover might, and the sun kisses the apples of both your cheeks, speckled through the leaves. These are unimportant details.

Mostly you cannot tear your eyes from the field of German bodies that comes into view as soon as you clamber out of the foxhole. There are twenty, maybe thirty of them -- a whole platoon draped like dolls over each other, shredded from high-caliber rounds. It is a mass grave.

Blood soaks into the dirt. The grass it drips from sways in the summer breeze without care. Blood drains from your face, leaving behind cold dread, and you smear it on your pants when you try and wipe it from your hands.

Some memories make it past the filter of your mind. It was enfilade fire, which is a technical term meant to obscure the horror a gunner witnesses when it happens. The Krauts had been lined up so neatly, eager to catch the rest of the company off-guard to the point of deadly carelessness.

You remember feeling mostly confusion when the first couple soldiers in your sights fell, only to reveal the others stacked up behind them, pierced by the same spray of bullets. Hubs, your ammunition bearer, had shouted something along the lines of 'get those fucking Krauts, Gunny!" before loading up another belt for you to bury more dead with. You don’t remember why Liebgott wasn’t there to do it instead.

That confusion you felt -- your mind unable to process the carnage -- gave way to urgency when you were reminded of your buddies, just over the hill, their backs turned and wanting for a bullet while they take care of the line. “Don’t let anyone past,” Lip had told you and Hubs before shuffling off. “We’re all countin’ on you.”

The Kraut platoon leader managed to get his men together a bit, and they stopped mid-charge to fire back upon your position. Vaguely, you remember an explosion, a squelch, a shout, being thrown against the wall, then jumping right back on your gun. And now you're left in the silence of a firefight. The air tastes heavy with blood.

"Gunner," Joe Toye rasps.

You shake your head and fumble with your breast pocket for a pack of gum. You set a stick of it between your teeth, bite down, and let the spearmint burn a hole through your tongue.

It feels deserved.

“Gunner.”

That’s your name. It’s what you are. A machine gunner.

Instruments of war are carefully, purposely, deadly. A well utilized machine gun can change the tide of an entire battle -- that lesson was drilled into you the moment they picked you out for a machine gunner, the moment you were christened in Toccoa by Joe Liebgott and O. Petty.

You are a machine gunner.

You attempt for a moment to hang onto that urgency you felt when Lip gave you your orders to justify the death in front of you. You’ve never seen so many bodies before. In certain spots, the Germans are two, three deep, dead and dying on top of each other. One of them wails. The sound pierces you faster than any bullet. The sound is stuck in your ears. It is there, always,whenever it is quiet.

Your mouth tastes like blood and spearmint. You hate that flavor. You squeeze your eyes shut, but no memory comes.

"Were you a good machine gunner?"

Yes. You were.

An hour later, the rest of Easy Company bustles around you. You are sitting next to your machine gun while Smokey cleans it, occasionally spitting the chewing tobacco from his mouth onto the grass.

"Joe," you ask quietly, staring down at your bandaged hands while they shake. Joe Toye grunts, and you meet his eyes then, feeling brittle and empty. "Where's Hubs?"

It isn’t until the next day you find out you’re wearing what’s left of him. Liebgott tells you this shamefully, wringing the straps of his musette bag and unable to look you in the eyes. You both feel the loss immensely.

But wars end eventually, and in October, the Virginia heat touches down once daily, in the early afternoon. Tommy sits down on the wood pile beside you and pulls out his lunch box, same as yours. You tilt your head back and enjoy the brittle heat of the day wrapping itself around you like a quilt. You let your eyes slip shut and it almost feels like just yesterday you were standing out on the gravel bank in your wrinkled uniform, throwing your medals into the Potomac, instead of three months ago. Your fingers twitch, and your thoughts are flooded with the taste of spearmint.

"Hey," Tommy grunts beside you.

You peak an eye open to find him holding out a saltwater taffy for you to take. His pockets are always full of them. You don't remember exactly when he picked the habit up, but it's been this way since you were kids.

You accept the small offering, unwrap it, then pop it in your mouth. "Thanks," you mutter, and he nods.

The afternoon is quiet. The sweat you worked up installing drywall is freezing on your back, but the toes of your boots are sweltering in the dry sun. You find yourself lingering for longer and longer in moments like these. It began in France, when Easy Company would eventually break in a relatively quiet town after going through hell.

You were always a bit greedy with food and personal property, everybody with siblings is, but you were never as greedy with anything else than a peaceful moment after your boots touched French soil for the very first time. Some days, it was as if your entire mind, body and soul wanted for nothing more than to lounge out in the sun and play a game of cards. You held on to those moments with a greed so intense that at times, it felt like nobody but General Taylor himself could order you away.

There are some things you need to learn to let go of, though.

“Where’s Ma?” you ask after a prolonged lapse in conversation. The question has been on your mind for some time now. Your mother's a tramp, but she usually shows her mousy face every couple weeks around the house, begging for table scraps, sometimes demanding them.

Tommy shrugs. “Hasn't been back nearly as much since you left. Last I heard -- you know how Beth is with her -- she went off to New Orleans or somewhere with a gentleman suitor. Hasn’t been back since March.”

You shake your head. “‘Course that’s where she went." You remember her waxing poetic about Mardi Gras and all of its sexual freedoms. You run a hand through your hair and wish quietly for the way Lieb would cut it. The conversation feels awkward and stilted when it shouldn't, because Tommy is your brother and you’ve known him since you were two and he was zero days old.

The air tastes uncomfortable, and humor is the only weapon you have to mask the flavor. "Anything else happen while I was gone?” you ask, half-joking.

Tommy shakes his head, the attempt at humor landing between his feet, a dud shell. “Not much has changed. You know Norma’s graduating this year, says she wants to be a movie star” -- you laugh good-naturedly at this -- “She’s got a plan and everythin’. L. A,” Tommy continues with a snort.

You open your mouth to respond but a quick shout interrupts you.

“Hey, Bug!” A couple of the other workers at the job site are approaching you. You smile curtly and nod your head. Tommy is silent while they poke and prod at you, try and get you to tell them a couple war stories.

“So tell us what it was like.”

“Did you shoot anyone?”

“You must be either brave or stupid to have volunteered to jump out of a perfectly good aeroplane.”

These are all things you've heard before, a part of the same, re-used script every man who didn't enlist carries in his back pocket.

“Hey, next time you’re down at Old Towne’s your drinks are on me, alright, hero?” That one's new, and something you're having difficulty getting used to. No one in town thinks much of your family, your mother's broke and half of you are abominations on your fathers' side, but a war hero is a war hero, you suppose. At least that's the case for you.

You say what you have to to get them to move on as quickly as possible. You don’t want to talk about any of it, you don't want to think about any of it -- you want to scrub Europe from your mind until it's the blurry memory of a night terror you only have early in the mornings, before you're fully awake.

“Alex is back in town.” Tommy says when the crowd of workers finally moves on.

You frown. “Since when?”

“Since Christmas. ‘Was all torn up when we broke the news that you’d gone, said that you were real brave and real foolish, waxed poetic about how you were worth the wait.”

You can't help the bitter laugh punched from your chest. “The wait?”

Tommy shakes his head in sympathy. “Norma chased her off before I could, and I had to hold Pat back from trying to maul her in town a couple times.”

You laugh and drop the conversation. Alex Lanchester is a jar of worms you don't want to reopen. She left you for a suit and the Big Apple two weeks before you finally confessed to enlisting.

It’s stupid to get caught up in someone like that, so you don’t. You just close your eyes and think of those lightning bugs on the Potomac and when Tommy lights up a cigarette, you keep your eyes closed and pretend they’re not Lucky Strikes.

In the winter there is ice along the Potomac. The gravel's crunch underfoot is sharper and the flow of the river is slowed to a crawl. This is an unusually cold year. The snow began in late November and hasn't stopped since.

You are standing at the edge of the water, where the ice is thick and uneven, and you watch the opposite bank for paranoid movement. You wander back to this beach often. It's changed, eerie like a mirror image of a place you once loved, but it is quiet and often empty.

You kick at the ice, watching it crumble beneath your feet, then your stomach lets you know it's growing impatient for lunch. You stare out across the Potomac for a moment longer, then turn on your heel and begin marching home.

You pass familiar landmarks as you go, all of them covered by a blanket of slushing, gray snow. There are boulders you'd played king of the hill on as a child, overgrown trails leading up to the manor sitting empty atop the hill, and the crooked oak Tommy once leapt out of, only to break his leg in two places. A faint smile pulls at the corners of your mouth when you remember how he blubbered while you dragged him home. He's taller now, and broad like an ox; he doesn’t often cry anymore.

You pause suddenly at a large willow draped over the river and the road. Its branches droop low, and are frozen to the shoreline. You almost don't recognize your own initials carved into it, next to an A.L. lovingly, painstakingly inscribed beside them.

You remember when you'd taken a knife to this tree, in your senior year of high school. There's no greater taste than love in your mouth, and Alex taught you that, kissed and kissed you and promised her life to you. You'd been convinced that the world would fold up in front of you like a red carpet, that you would never want to wash out the flavor of caramel popcorn and a promise for the future like starshine from your mouth.

You press your fingers to the damaged bark, trying to glean some sort of emotion from it, then pull your hand away as if burned. It's stupid to get caught up in a person like that, so you don't. You pull out a pack of Lucky Strikes you'd nicked off Tommy, and set a cigarette between your lips.

The taste is strong, stronger than anything you'd ever had before. It makes your eyes water, but you keep it unlit and resting against your tongue as you walk home, ignoring the way your heart throbs until you're once again staring up at your three-bedroom house, at the end of the shitty road, wondering what in the hell you're supposed to do with yourself now that you're no longer 'Gunner', but instead 'Bug' once more, like you used to be.

You don't feel much like 'Buggy' these days.

You just feel tired.

You're sitting in your bed facing the window. The radiator under it is rattling, and the heat rolling off the coils warms the front of your body. Out the window, Virginia is naked and pale under the early morning sun, and you watch as the gray forest shivers in the breeze. The chill drives you to a razor’s edge and pulls memories you'd long since drowned to the surface of a river edged with ice.

You see faces just under the surface of those dark waters, staring up at you. You blink the image away, then see half-buried foxholes from the Ardennes out your window, waiting in the treeline at the edge of the yard.

You see yourself huddled in one of them, behind your machine gun, and Joe Toye sitting next to you, griping about his feet and smoking like a chimney. His face, his hands, his voice were rough. You wanted to die wrapped up in the blanket of his stumbled, awful vocabulary. Everything about him was warm to the touch, sometimes like spring sunshine, sometimes like the lick of fire up the side of a pan.

But winter leaves a bad taste in your mouth, like the bite of iron in blood. You can't stand the flavor anymore, and with it comes this itching under your skin; discomfort, rage.

You turn away and pull open the top drawer of your bedside table, intent on finding the pack of Lucky Strikes you stole from Tommy. There is a stack of letters held together with a rubber band, some faded photographs full of blurry faces, taken in Europe, and those cigarettes.

The taste of blood in your mouth is unbearable. It tastes the same as a field of German bodies. You lick your teeth, stare at the pack, then decide you deserve the flavor. You shove the cigarettes back into the drawer so they're hiding under a photo of Second Platoon, then look back outside. It's begun to feather snow.

Winter and the holiday season are in full swing, now -- The kids are home on Christmas break, playing in the snow and bothering Beth at all hours of the day, and the world outside your home is quiet and cold. It leaves a bad taste in your mouth, like the bite of iron in blood. You can't think of anything there is to celebrate anymore, and the fact that people are celebrating at all is enough to make undeserved anger well up in your chest.

There is a pounding of feet up the old stairs that stops abruptly at the door behind you.

"Beth says breakfast is ready."

You look over your shoulder to find Em hanging from the doorway, poking her head into the bedroom. Her clothes are a clash of yellows and warm blues, and she flashes her teeth when she grins at you.

"Thanks, Sweet Em."

Her eyes light up at the name, then she bounds across the room and drapes herself over your back. You grunt when she squeezes you, her sharp chin poking into your shoulder, then laugh, and grab her arms where they're clasped in front of your throat so you can stand up with her.

"Noo!" she squeals and wraps her legs around your waist, but she lets you carry her all the way down to the table, where you let her off at her favorite chair, then take Lip's seat next hers. "Got any plans for this lovely winter break, Em?"

Em shrugs her shoulders and begins to eat her oats. “Dog and Tommy said they’d go sledding with us! Did you want to come, too?”

Your mind fills with images of foxholes and forgotten faces and your smile falters for a moment, but you work to ignore the dread sinking into your chest. You're interrupted by a shout.

“Hey, Bug! Did you really cut your hair like this? And who’re your buddies?” Ulysses comes thundering down the steps holding a picture over his head. You immediately know the one, it was taken the day before D-Day when you’d all been kitted out. Joe Toye was in it, so was Smokey and Liebgott.

Panic like anger blooms in your chest. He shouldn't be going through your things. You fix Ulysses with a look. "Give it back."

"Why?" He shrinks back, holding the picture to his chest. "It's just a picture."

He shouldn't be going through your things. Your eyes burn. You're beyond words. You leap up and try to snatch it, but Ulysses backs up the stairs, holding it behind his back. The fact that he's holding that piece of you, waving it around, unsettles something in your chest. Beth shouts something, but you don't hear her.

"Give it back, Ulysses!"

He can play with your uniform all he wants, take your loot out and parade it around his friends like he was the one to steal it, but that picture is personal. It's the last thing you have left of your buddies. You grab Ulysses by the belt and tug him towards you to try and snatch the picture from him, but he squirms in your hold. "Hey! Stop it! That hurts!"

"Then give it back!" you shout, increasingly desperate and mad, tugging until Ulysses falls back onto the stairs, shouting at you. Then Jim-boy appears at the top of the stairs, and descends then faster than you can react. He snatches the picture out of Ulysses' hands, gives him a withering look, then holds it out for you to take.

The silence that follows a firefight is unbearable. You remember that they used to call you 'Gunner'.

You feel four pairs of eyes on you. Ulysses is rubbing his elbow where he knocked it on the stairs. You look down at the picture.

It's of Second Platoon, the same one you'd thought it was. Joe Toye and Liebgott are on either side of you, smiling. You have both your hands on your ammunition bearer, Hubs', shoulders, leaning over him and you're grinning widely, your mohawk cut fresh on your head.

Guarnere is towards the back, caught shouting something over his shoulder. Smokey, Rogers, and McClung are next to each other, arms over each other's shoulders. Malarkey and Buck are arm-in-arm with big, cheesy grins. Petty's there too, and Ramirez. Popeye, Muck, Penkala. There is paint on your faces. Half of you are dead.

Your hand shakes the more you stare at it, anger and frustration rising in you until you're choked by it. "Fuck!" Half of you are dead. You feel as if you died with them. Maybe you wish you had.

You drop the photo on the floor and stalk out the back door, not bothering with shoes even though the ground is covered in snow. The dog barks happily, but you ignore him and the slap of the screen door as you head straight towards the gnarled apple tree, knowing you can sit behind it in peace. Your feet burn in the snow, but it's nothing you're not used to.

From the house you hear Beth’s low voice scolding Ulysses, but it’s not his fault. You’ve changed.

The days that follow are rough. Winter's maw opens up and deepens; swallows you whole. It snows heavily through the rest of the week. You spend the meat of your days working, and the lean margins down at the Potomac, staring at the river ice and the faces just beneath the surface.

Now it is well past sunset, and it is cold. The white of the snow and clouds reflect the distant city lights, creating an eerie, lilac, never-ending twilight that surrounds you, holds its breath and watches your every move.

Bastogne never had any color; it was just gray. In Virginia, the winter is steeped in purples and pinks when night falls, and during the day it is powder fresh and bluebird soft.

You're sitting on a frozen log, throwing rocks at the river ice when you hear the sharp crunch of gravel behind you. You jump violently at the sound but don’t turn to see who it is even when your instincts scream for you to. A part of you wants to wait and see if they'll give up without acknowledgement, dreading any interaction, and another part doesn't care anymore.

"It's been a while." After a prolonged silence, a familiar voice rings out in the silence of winter. It is singular and friendly. Alex dusts the snow off a bit of log next to you, and smooths her skirt as she takes a seat beside you.

You continue to stare across the river, ignoring the faces in favor of searching for Krauts now. You're not quite sure why, but you're not surprised she's here.

Beside you, Alex digs the toe of her boot into the snow covered gravel, then asks, "how long have you been back in town?"

Your mouth is dry. "Since August,” you say reluctantly.

She sighs. "You never came to see me."

Her tone rubs against you like a cat asking for its chin to be scratched, then tests its claws in your chest. You remind yourself to be mad-- "Yeah, well, you left me first--" But you're not. You're not upset with her. Maybe you were, in the beginning, but you're not anymore. You don't think you could be even if you tried. You're so far removed from that heartbreak, it seems insignificant after everything you've done and seen.

"Can't say I blame you for being angry," Alex says frankly.

You roll your stiff shoulders and heave a sigh. You're past giving a damn. You bounce another rock off the river ice, then rub your chapped hands together. It might just be the way the light bounces off the snow, but sometimes you can still feel, see, smell the blood on them. You can still taste it. They are red. You work your jaw around a phantom piece of spearmint gum, then wish for the bitter taste of Lucky Strikes.

“What happened?” Alex asks.

You stare hard at the ground. "I went to war."

"No," she laughs humorlessly, then gestures to your hands. "What happened?"

You follow her gaze down to your hand, and it takes you a moment to realize she's not talking about the blood, but your scars. They are raised, irregular and uncomfortable. You stare at your skin for a moment, then hide your hands between your knees. "Burned myself with the barrel of my machine gun." Your nails cut your palm as you first your hands, and your mouth runs before you can catch it. "Had no choice but to bare-hand it. Doc patched me up afterward, said I was lucky that it wasn't as bad as it could've been."

She is quiet, then remarks, “Sounds painful.”

You are not yourself. You feel a sudden urge to correct her. "It didn't hurt till the morning -- I didn't even notice it to begin with."

There is more, just waiting on the tip of your tongue to be spilled. You haven't so much as breathed a word of the war in the months you've been home, so why is the urge to speak so uncontrollable now?

"It happened the same day my first assistant gunner died right beside me, a direct hit with a bazooka round, had his guts sprayed all over me and everything, and I didn't know till the morning. Joe had to pull me outta the foxhole, all covered in gore and that's when this--" you hold up your arm-- "happened, or a little afterwards, you know, when we finally got into the town we'd been trying to liberate. Fucking Nazis."

You look up to find Alex watching you with pity. You turn to watch the river instead. There is movement in the dark forest across the way. You squeeze your knees and shake your head. There aren't any Krauts anymore.

“Never mind.” “It must have been hell over there.”

"It wasn't."

"What?" she asks.

"It was," you amend. You realize that you don't know how long you've been sitting out here in the cold. It must be well past dinner. You pat your knees and make to stand with a huff. “Well, I gotta go. Beth won’t like it if I’m out after dark for too long. She barely lets me outta her sight anyways.”

“I missed you, you know," Alex says suddenly, voice wobbly.

You glance over at her, then back across the river at the Krauts and Bitterness returns. “I’m sure you did. Everyone misses the war hero.”

“No,” she says, “I mean I missed you. You. Breaking it off with you was the biggest mistake I ever made.”

You close your eyes, and even though you're standing in the exact spot you once had, before you'd gone off to war, a toy soldier, you can't picture this beach the way it had once been. But you remember Joe Toye, when he'd held you in that foxhole in France, rocked you, whispered right in your ear that you'd be okay.

"You know--" you start to say, then are forced to stop when your voice shakes with emotion you didn't know you felt. You swallow thickly, and blink your wet eyes. "You know, burning my hand or even losing Hubs wasn't the worst part of that day."

Alex looks up, but you stare at your hands. There is blood on them, and now you're sure it's not just the lilac sky. "It was knowing I killed those Germans. A whole platoon. I mowed down a whole platoon of Krauts with just a single gun -- and they were just kids, you know, like Hubs -- Like Dog. Just like him!

"I got a medal for it, they fucking congratulated me, said I was real brave. Crazy thing to tell a murderer, ain't it?"

There is a brief silence, then Alex sighs.

"Merry Christmas," she says sardonically, and it confuses you for a moment until you realize that today is Christmas. December twenty-fifth. What an arbitrary date. You remember how she used to be so adamant you celebrate it with her.

"Merry Christmas," you breathe, hollow. You feel her eyes on you for a moment, then she directs her gaze back out over the Potomac, and you wonder if she's looking for Krauts too, the way Joe would.

You wish for a flare. You wish for Tommy's Lucky Strikes to burn your tongue on. You try and fight the tears, but you're just so goddamn tired. You're more Gunner than you ever were Bug now, and Gunner is so goddamn tired. Why is that?

Your weak knees force you to take a seat on the log once more, and you drop your head into your hands, aware of Alex and how she is watching you, pitying you. Joe would never look at you like that.

You heave a quiet, shaky sob at that thought. How are you ever supposed to be Bug again? Since you were Gunner when you leapt to your death in Normandy? Since you were Gunner when you killed in cold blood for your buddies? Since you were Gunner when Joe Toye would hold you and make you forget about everything but him and his goddamn lightning bug eyes? Since you were Gunner when you heard the crack of a bat, then the news that the war would be over, for good this time.

You try and stifle the way you cry into your hands, but you can't. It is like the rain in Virginia: Absolute. A firestorm. You can't control the way your body shakes with each rattling, frozen breath. Your vision blurs to nothing and you dig the heels of your palms so hard into your eyes you see spots.

You barely realize what's happening when Alex wraps an arm around your back and leans into you, holding you tight to her chest. She's warm, and not as solid as Joe, but she is a startlingly welcome comfort nonetheless. As long as she stays quiet, you can even pretend that It's Joe Toye holding you instead, in Bastogne, whispering to himself and singing that stupid Billie Holiday song he was so obsessed with.

But you didn't love Joe Toye. He tasted like Lucky Strikes and hellfire and the twilight lit up by flares, drifting like lightning bugs in the sky. His river was not the same as your river from memory but it's all you can seem to think about these days. That night in France, when you'd been so close to something, but afraid to grasp it. Why can't you forget that night, like the rest of the war?

This makes you cry harder.

You didn't love Joe Toye, but you loved Alex a lifetime ago. Before all of this, you'd been in love, carved your initials next to hers in a tree and promised each other the rest of your long lives.

This is one thing you know for certain: Joe Toye did not taste like love, but Alex tasted like starshine and caramel popcorn and first dates and first loves and hurt and broken promises and it turns your stomach the way your fifth candy apple does but you want it anyways.

You fucking want it anyways.

Masterlist | Posting Schedule

#bob #band of brothers #band of brothers imagine #band of brothers x reader #joe toye #joseph toye #joe toye x reader #joseph toye x reader #joe toye imagine #joseph toye imagine

29 notes · View notes