#ateez wooyoung angst
Text
place in me | jung wooyoung
pairing: chef!wooyoung x chef!gn reader
genre: angst, slow burn, fluff, ex2l
word count: 17k
warnings: angsty af, kinda toxic workplace, food, drinking, i know jackshit about cooking apart from hell's kitchen, masterchef and google searches, one (1) sex joke, reader is kinda dumb.
a/n: this has been in the works since march. i gotta stop procrastinating. anyhoww, i cited "m. butterfly" by david henry hwang and reworked one of my favorite quotes ever from "jane eyre" by charlotte brontë bc i luv her. hope u guys enjoy it <3
networks: @cromernet 🫶🏻
playlist: beside you by 5sos, finally // beautiful stranger by halsey, sparks fly by taylor swift, sorry by halsey, back to december by taylor swift, right where you left me by taylor swift, the winner takes it all by abba, haunted by taylor swift, amnesia by 5sos, place in me by luke hemmings
masterlist | navi
During quiet nights you worked best. It had always been that way ever since you were a student and you didn’t think things would change. Not when the kitchen was completely silent except for the slow rumbling of whatever you had on the stove and the swift swish of your chopping knife against the cutting board. You loved listening to music while cooking, but on nights like these, you preferred the muffled sounds of the city coming in from the cracked open window and the occasional humming that left your mouth.
It was peaceful enough to remember why you loved cooking so much. Not that you ever forgot but, lately, it was hard to find joy in your job. The hustle and bustle of the kitchen kept you busy enough to render your work almost mechanical, punctuated by the quick rhythm of orders coming in. All the loud noises around you sent you into a frenzy more often than not.
It was on nights like these - in the kitchen of your own apartment, off duty for the evening - immersed in the mellow atmosphere you created, that you wondered if it had all been worth it. The studying, the getting yelled at, Paris… If it had all brought you to this - working in a Michelin star restaurant you had only ever dreamed of setting foot in - but could never get you anywhere past it. If this was your final dream, your last ambition, then why did it all feel so heavy?
It was a question you could never answer. You took great pride in your work and in yourself for getting you where you were. You liked some of your fellow chefs, and the reaction your answer got out of people when they asked you where you worked. It lit a match in you, it felt like a pat on the shoulder to your younger self. But when you got home exhausted and so not ready to face it all again the next morning, doubt clung heavily to your mind.
You turned off the burner with a sour taste in your mouth you knew only your cooking could melt away. Sat down in front of your gamjatang, you took a big breath before diving in. You had avoided the dish like the plague ever since then, but somehow tonight your hands moved for you when reaching for the ingredients. The circumstances couldn’t have been more different than when you last cooked it; you weren’t hungover, it wasn’t four in the morning, and you weren’t halfway across the world with him.
A memory pushed and shoved to come to the forefront of your mind, one about warmth and love and understanding all washing over you in the tiny kitchenette of a Paris apartment where, with him, you tipsily laughed and slow danced to the music of your hearts beating at the same time.
It wasn’t surprising that it just didn’t taste the same. Recipe and execution-wise it was perfect, you couldn’t count the amount of times you cooked the soup. But it tasted off, somehow. And right now you didn’t have the mental capacity to analyze why. So you just ate in silence, a slight frown on your lips with every spoonful, grateful you only had to load the washing machine before going to bed, disappointed your peaceful night of cooking had been ruined.
–
“What’s got your panties in a twist today?”
Park Seonghwa was your favorite coworker. You two started working at Hwang’s at the same time and bonded pretty quickly. He was quiet and focused, a perfectionist when it came to his job and never really contributed to the migraine-inducing bustling crowd of chefs around you. He also would never dare to speak like this when you both were in earshot of the sous chef. You sighed. Apparently, you had woken up on the wrong side of the bed this morning and proceeded to grill your junior chef Jongho with more bite than usual.
“Please don’t say that when Seo’s so close to us,” you flashed him a warning look which was met with a mischievous smirk.
“We all know you’re aiming for his spot, with the scolding you just did he can only be proud,” the sous chef in your kitchen had the reputation of being even worse than head chef Lee, truly the bane of everyone’s existence. You didn’t want to be like him.
“Oh, lord,” you shook your head, slowing down your chopping the slightest bit. You’d woken up with a headache after a fitful night of sleep, already frustrated with the world before even facing it. Missing the bus and clocking in late didn’t help either, not when you were greeted with a murderous glare from the head chef. You didn’t mean to be snappy with your junior, but things had inevitably piled up.
“I don’t even know if I want the position anymore,” you grunted under your breath, earning a soft giggle from Seonghwa.
“Careful saying that out loud, or the vultures will try even harder to take you down,” he knew better than to bump his shoulder with yours, lest he interrupted your furious chopping and ended up being the reason you lost a finger, but did it anyway. The sweet gesture comforted you, surprisingly you didn’t feel the urge to bite his head off.
“Let them,” you meant the words to sound a little less disheartened than they did, but all of last night’s thinking had seemingly gotten to you. Seonghwa gave you a confused look but could say little before being interrupted.
“Executive Chef Kim needs to speak to you,” the eyes of the whole kitchen were on you as a sort of stillness descended upon everyone. Even Seonghwa beside you looked surprised, even if less than everyone else. You knew in his head he was probably cooking up some joke about you being the next tyrant sous.
There were two ways this encounter could go: either fire you or promote you. A conviction that grew stronger when you entered the still-empty restaurant and sat at a table were not only the executive chef, but also the owner and manager, waiting for you. Why would they do this hours before opening?
“Thank you for joining us,” manager Na said as soon as you sat down in front of them. “As you may be aware, chef Kim and chef Lee have had their eyes on you as a possible candidate to replace chef Seo once he retires.” Her piercing eyes stared deep into your soul. You nodded, almost afraid to speak, wondering why in the world you chose to work for such intimidating people.
“I’m afraid you will not be taking that spot.”
A low blow. Somehow, even when you were neither too hopeful nor too enthusiastic about becoming sous chef, the rejection still hurt. It still sent a jolt of disappointment and self-doubt shooting through you. Were you not doing a good job? Were you not up to their standards?
“However,” you looked up again, your eyes now on executive chef Kim. “Mr. Hwang is opening up another restaurant.”
“I’m not sure I follow,” you mumbled, wheels slowly turning in your head. Manager Na smiled knowingly.
“I would like to give you the opportunity to become head chef in my new restaurant,” Mr. Hwang said. “I’m told by chef Kim and chef Lee that you would fit the position better than the one of sous chef. I trust their judgment.”
It took all you had not to let your jaw hang in front of them. Head chef? Had they lost their minds? Never had your mind taken the decision for you before you could even rationalize your thoughts.
“Could I think about it?”
“Time ticks fast here, you know that chef Y/L/N,” Manager Na’s intimidating eyes were on you again. “We’d like to have an answer in two days at most.”
With a curt nod, they dismissed you. You didn’t think you had ever made a beeline for the bathroom so fast in your entire life. Surely, you couldn’t go back into the kitchen looking like your cat just died. Everybody would know something was wrong, they would know that the position as sous was still free and you had been shot down. And there was little they could do better than kicking a man when he was down.
So you sat in the cubicle, trying to calm your shaking hands and regain composure. Act like nothing happened. Betray no emotion. Go back to dicing potatoes exactly one centimeter by one centimeter. Not a millimeter more, not one less.
Assholes. All of them. They couldn’t have chosen a better moment to tell you this than the most hectic night of the week. And now you’d have to work through it. Through the eyes trailed on you, holding questions and spite and jealousy. Through chef Lee’s and chef Seo’s yelled reprimanding, making sure everything was just perfect for the critic coming in.
Just one more night.
Never had you held on so tightly to such meager consolation.
–
“You look like you need a beer.”
Seonghwa’s voice broke the silence of the back alley. After closing, you decided to stick around instead of fleeing home like you usually would. It had been a while since the last time you sat outside the back entrance of the kitchen, alone with your thoughts after hours of noise.
“I need vodka,” you voiced, not looking up as he took a spot beside you.
“That’s stooping so low, what’s wrong?”
You knew the question would come. Somehow he had not asked anything when you entered the kitchen again with a blank face. A murmur had slithered past as you took your place and started working again. But Seonghwa had just shot you a look, resuming his work as well.
“They want to make me head chef at Hwang’s new restaurant.”
“But that’s great!” He was looking at you with those big, wide, excited eyes of his and a genuine smile on his lips. One would think the offer was made to him. You were almost sorry you had to wipe that happiness away.
“I don’t know if I want that…”
“What do you mean?” He looked puzzled, but not surprised. You sighed. How did you explain this without sounding crazy?
“I mean… I-” you grunted, hands in your hair. “When’s the last time you felt like cooking?”
Seonghwa stared back with a slight frown in his brow, eyes bouncing around your face in an effort to understand.
“Like, really cooking. Without walking into the kitchen and wanting to throw up, or dreading opening time and all the yelling. I know it’s how it is when you work for such big names but fuck. Everything’s too fast and I… it feels like I don’t care anymore, Hwa. They took my passion and stomped all over it.”
“Didn’t you want to be a high end, gourmet restaurant chef?”
You stared, mouth hanging open. Of course, you did. It was your biggest dream, your one ambition. It was excruciating that all the pressure was making you break, making you think that you weren’t cut out for this and you had wasted your time.
“I did, I do.”
“But?”
“But this isn’t it. This feels like a survival show, where everyone’s out for blood. I understand competitiveness, but I can hardly breathe when we start cooking. Chef Seo is a literal nightmare and I don’t think I can do it anymore in a place like this.”
“I see…”
“You think I lost my mind,” you let your head tilt back, eyes on the starless night sky.
“Maybe you did,” Seonghwa said. “That doesn’t mean you’re wrong.”
“I’ll be honest, I never thought I’d hear you like this,” he continued. “You hold such pride for what you do and how you do it. I think Seo might yell at you just because he’s irritated he’s got nothing on you. Half of the people hate you for how well you manage.”
“Gee, thanks,” you scoffed.
“My point is,” he bumped his shoulder with yours. “That it’s indicative of how much this place fucking sucks if they got you breaking. A Michelin kitchen, or any kitchen for that matter, shouldn’t burn out their best chefs.”
“Jongho is so brave for junioring here,” you deflected, allowing his words to soothe your burning wounds.
“Hey, we did that too!”
“Yeah, and look at where it got us,” you giggled, smiling for the first time tonight. Seonghwa huffed out a laugh.
A beat of silence passed. You were glad for Seonghwa. Even though you often joked he was just your favorite coworker, you considered him a dear friend. One of your only friends for the matter.
“What are you gonna do?”
“I’ll quit,” you heard his surprised gasp and chuckled. “And I’ll refuse the position. I know head chef sounds better but I know them. Manager Na and Mr. Hwang will only hire straight up assholes and I’d have to deal with it, and not even as executive chef.”
“We’re not assholes!” his hand sat on his chest in mock offense, you giggled.
“We look like assholes and do our job quietly and damn near perfectly, that’s why we’re here.”
Mumbling something along the lines of I guess so, Seonghwa accepted the heavy truth. In the quiet alley, sitting with your friend, you felt okay. The murmur of the busy city filled your heart as you quietly giggled and remembered your first days working at Hwang’s. Goodbyes were always hard on you, but not this time. You expected gut-wrenching pain and tears and the heavy burden of failure on your shoulders as you accepted your decision. But none of it manifested, not when Seonghwa had snuck one of the most expensive bottles of wine out of the kitchen and launched himself in a perfect rendition of Chef Seo’s latest meltdown. Maybe taking a step back didn’t mean failing, something you never would’ve believed mere months ago.
-
The sound of freedom equated to the one of your blaring alarms each morning. It had been two weeks since you had quit your job, but you still refused to get a good night’s sleep. Well, except the night you told Seonghwa and you ended up drunk off your faces.
You rolled over, turning off the annoying alarm, ready to start another day of not knowing what to do. There were few things you enjoyed doing, apart from cooking, when all you were left with was free time and silence. It was nice getting out of the house in the early spring morning to buy groceries, go for walks, and swing by your friend’s flower shop, but it got old quickly. Mostly, you didn’t like how sometimes, while cooking, memories you tried to never think of seemed to resurface on their own.
When you finally got to the kitchen and there was nothing but eggs in the fridge – it was shopping day – you settled on an omelette for breakfast. Only, halfway through cooking, your mind wandered back there.
When Chef Berrien asked you to make an omelette you wanted to laugh. You didn’t though, not when you saw the serious frown he was sporting. He was being serious? The absurdity of the situation made you question if dropping everything you had back at home just to fly to Paris to master your craft had been worth it. Maybe your mother was right, maybe you were crazy.
“Omelettes are the easiest thing to spoil,” he stood resolutely in front of you all. “Only good chefs make good omelettes.”
Oh god, your mother was right.
“Good luck,” a smug voice sounded from beside you.
If there was someone who could push you over the edge Chef Berrien shoved you to, it was Jung Wooyoung. In just two weeks of sharing your working station with him, you discovered that his bubbly personality clashed with your silent brooding. You preferred to work in silence and, apparently, he thrived in chaos.
“You too,” you grumbled, getting your few ingredients ready. How in the world were you supposed to prove your worth with a fucking omelette? You closed your eyes and sighed, getting to work.
“That definitely looks… simple,” Wooyoung mumbled as Berrien walked through the cooking stations, pulling faces at every dish. You looked down at yours - a plain, french omelette - then at his - all prettily plated and definitely cheese filled - and bit your tongue.
“He asked for an omelette, not a Michelin star worthy breakfast,” you hastily whispered, wishing he would just shut up for once.
“Aren’t we training to be Michelin star worthy chefs?” came his rebuttal, getting on your last nerve with that pretty smirk of his.
Pretty?
You scoffed and shook your head, straightening your back and clearing your throat as Berrien came close to your station. When the chef’s eyes landed on your omelette, a slight frown pulled his lips downwards. As he walked away, you did your best to ignore Wooyoung’s silent snicker and the burning in your cheeks. After the evaluation, you kept quiet for the rest of the day.
It sometimes happened that you would close off to the rest of the world, and focused only on what you were thinking and the task at hand. Most often when you were cooking, which both helped and hindered your work. As much as you needed to focus on what you were doing, you also needed to listen to orders while doing it. You hoped to get better at managing it, it was why you were here, after all. Though, for now, after a full day surrounded by people, you were happy sitting alone with your back resting against the backdoor to the kitchen.
“Is the silent treatment payback for beating you today?”
The door flew open, making you lose balance for a second, then came his question.
“You didn’t beat me, Wooyoung, this is not a competition,” you sighed, keeping your eyes set on the wall in front of you rather than on his figure sitting down beside you.
“Sounds like something a sore loser would say,” he bumped his shoulder with yours, no doubt with a shit-eating grin on his lips. That did it.
“Just because your omelette got a nod and mine got a frown, it doesn’t mean yours was better!” You all but exploded, finally looking at him. Indeed, he was wearing a smug grin.
“Well, Chef Berrien would disagree,” you scoffed as he looked at you with shiny, distracting, eyes. Was it the light from the lamppost reflected in them or had the lack of sleep finally got to your brain? You shook your head, ridding yourself of the thought.
“Fuck you too, I guess,” you finally said, turning back around, earning a laugh from him.
You didn’t want to stop and think about why his laugh pulled a snicker out of you, making you feel so light and at ease.
“Does this mean you’ll go back to talking to me then?” He asked, sounding a little small. “You’re not mad?”
Something pulled at your heartstrings, hearing him ask something like that. Did he really think you were mad at him? You probably looked like an asshole for the rest of the day after Berrien barely passed your omelette.
“I’m not,” you said much faster than you anticipated. “I never was.”
“That’s good,” he smiled, and you weren’t sure you liked the warmth that blossomed in your chest.
You avoided thinking of your training in Paris with all your might, and he was the reason why. But it seemed that now that your whole world had turned upside down, your brain could do nothing but. Add that to the list of things you hated about unemployment. A funny smell pulled you from your thoughts, eyes focusing back on the almost burned omelette in front of you. Mumbling curses under your breath, you turned off the heat and plated it. This was why you never let your thoughts take over.
You ate your spoiled breakfast in silence, deciding to get started with your day and your grocery shopping, mentally listing all the food you’d need. Anything, really, at this point to keep your mind occupied with something that wasn’t him.
It was still hard for you to wrap your head around what Jung Wooyoung meant to you. Or rather, you knew perfectly well and tried to avoid it like the plague. He was a closed chapter you didn’t want to revisit simply because it hurt. Because there was a point in time where he meant the whole world to you, where he was your whole world, and you decided to burn it all down only to choke on the ashes of what it used to be.
You left wondering if he was still writing pages or considered the story closed and done as you did. Like you had to not to drown in guilt.
While walking down the street, warm sunlight caressing your face, you asked yourself why it was all coming back to you now. A hollow of confusion had opened up in your chest, and of its own volition your heart chose to fill it with such memories. When Wooyoung came into your life, he did so by taking it by storm; randomly, upsetting all you had ever known, and maybe at the wrong time. That didn’t mean he didn’t leave a sign, a permanent one, on your heart. And now that you were crawling in confusion, he was barging in once more.
Wooyoung was late. It was teamwork evaluation day and your project partner was nowhere to be seen. Chef Berrien had sent daggers flying your way upon seeing the empty side of your workstation, not waiting a second longer to start the class. You wanted the ground to open up and swallow you whole and also to strangle Wooyoung on sight. There must’ve been a logical reason why he still hadn’t shown up when you were supposed to finish your three-day project. If the fucker left you alone to finish cooking lièvre à la royale, you were seriously going to give him the scolding of a lifetime.
Anxiety started to claw at your stomach, twisting it in knots and tugging at them in a way that made it harder to breathe. Under the chef’s pointed gaze you could only stay as still as possible, hoping he’d prolong his very unsubtle speech about tardiness until Wooyoung got here, praying he would, and yet cursing him in your head.
He still hadn’t shown up when he gave the class permission to start working. You sighed in frustration, walking to the fridge to retrieve the hare you’d cooked the day before with trembling hands. Back at your station, you realized that working while checking the door every three seconds would get you nowhere, and you weren’t about to fail the assignment even if half of your team was missing.
When the meat was finally cleaned of the jellied liquid it had sat in overnight, and you were preparing to cut it into exactly eighty grams slices - not one more, not one less, Berrien's voice sounded in your head - the door to the kitchen burst open.
In came a panting Wooyoung, his white chef jacket buttoned up a little crooked, who tried to make his way to your station unseen. It didn’t work.
“Jung,” Berrien’s voice resonated in the hot hair of the kitchen, making everyone stop working for a beat. Too bad no one had time to spare. You started slicing. “I don’t appreciate tardiness.”
“I’m very sorry, Chef-” he held his hand up next to his face, shutting up your partner.
“You may start cooking,” you let out a breath you didn’t know you’d been holding the whole time, shoulders almost sagging in relief. “But don’t think I won’t keep this in mind during evaluation.”
The frustration you’d tried to keep at bay so far flared up once more, and your grip on the knife tightened. Wooyoung silently made his way next to you, washing his hands carefully and using the time to assess how far you’d gotten into the process. You didn’t utter a single word, fuming quietly as you focused on your task and he picked up on his.
You couldn’t afford to lose time bickering now, and for the first time in a while, you cooked in complete silence, the air around you tense and devoid of the usual jokes he would throw around to lift your spirits. No banter, just instructions and cooking for the next five hours.
Despite everything, Chef Berrien couldn’t hide how pleased he was with your dish, which didn’t end up at the top of the class only because of Wooyoung’s mishap. As soon as the chef dismissed you, you fled the kitchen.
“Wait!” Wooyoung’s voice called after you, who were already outside and determined to escape to your apartment to avoid cussing him out in front of your fellow chefs, who had already thrown confused glances at you the whole day.
“Hey, hold up!” He caught you by the wrist, spinning you around. If he wanted to do this here, who were you to deny him?
“What.” Wooyoung almost flinched at the harshness of your voice.
“I’m sorry I was late, I really am, I just-”
“Save it,” you cut him off. “Day’s over, damage is done, and we ended up with an alright grade. I don’t want to fight.”
It was true. For how mad you’d been, you didn’t want to make it worse. You could tell he was sorry by the way he’d cooked in silence, waltzing around you as if you were a bomb ready to go off at any minute. It had taken all your strength not to. You made to turn around and walk away, but he was determined to make you listen to what he had to say.
“Can you come with me?” He sounded defeated despite the determination in his eyes. All you really wanted was to go home, wash up and rot in bed. You were tired, physically and mentally drained by the day. But your friend – because how could you deny that Wooyoung had become more than a simple classmate in the last month? He’d quietly snuck up on you, surprising you with his cheerful smile and awful jokes, and slowly but steadily carved his own spot into your heart, now beating to the rhythm of his screechy laughter and kind words – was pleading you with his brown, burning eyes and how could you say no?
Sighing in defeat, you nodded, readjusting the strap of your backpack on your shoulder and watching as his frown turned into a soft smile. Wooyoung took your hand in his, going back into the building, and guided you up the stairs. Transfixed, you stared at your hands; his felt slightly rough from all the cooking but still soft. You ignored the warmth the simple gesture sparked in your heart and followed quietly; you could only hope he wouldn’t get the two of you expelled.
Finally, you got to the last flight of stairs, legs burning and chest heaving. You hoped he had a good reason to be dragging you up six flights of stairs and potentially getting you in trouble for trespassing. He ushered you to the small balcony, apparently mostly used for storage, and nodded to a shaky ladder perched onto its wall, leading to the roof. You often did this at your apartment too, the one perk of living on the last floor, but suddenly your mouth went dry.
“How did you even have the time to find out about this-'' you climbed the small way up, thanking your lucky star that the building at least had a flatter roof compared to yours. But the words died in your mouth when you finally got your bearings and looked around.
Wooyoung emerged as well, now leaning against one of the chimneys. You sat down, amazed at the view all around you; as the sun set in the West, tinging the bluish sky with hues of warm orange and golden light, you spotted the Sacre Coeur sitting North and the Eiffel Tower immersed in a pink blush down South. A light breeze passed by, blowing a strand of dark hair into Wooyoung’s eyes, taking your breath away. Paris was quite the show from up there.
“I really am sorry,” slowly, he made his way over, sitting down next to you as he cast his eyes onto the breathtaking view in front of you. “I overslept, couldn’t find my keys, then had to rush here and… I’m sorry.”
You scoffed, not believing he almost failed the both of you because he didn’t hear his alarm in the morning. Actually, you could believe it, because it was such a Wooyoung thing to do. You couldn’t stay mad for long though, not when you turned to look at him and simply seeing his face bathing in the golden sun made your heart stutter in your chest. Not when his sorry eyes were melting like honey in the light.
“I wanted to punch you in the face when you came in late,” overwhelmed by his gaze, you looked away. Faintly, you heard him scoff beside you. “But I was also relieved. I didn’t think Berrien would let you cook.”
“I was ready to beg on my knees,” you snickered, Wooyoung elbowed your side. “No, really, lièvre à la royale is a bitch, I wouldn’t have let you cook it alone.”
“Then why did you sleep through your alarm? I was seeing red and had a knife in my hand, do you have a death wish?” You joked, heart singing when you made him laugh.
“Hey, I had trouble sleeping last night,” he defended himself, hands up as his laughter died down. With a furrowed brow and inquisitive eyes, you finally looked back at him, studying his face. Only then you noticed the purplish circles under his eyes, just a bit darker than usual.
“Why?” You asked, trying to sound less worried than how you felt. It was Wooyoung’s turn to avoid your eyes and look out at the Parisian skyline, starting to twinkle in the fast-approaching night.
“I- well,” he sighed as you kept looking, feeling the air around you shift. The way Wooyoung was struggling to come up with an answer had you feeling like you were standing at the edge of a cliff, buzzing with expectation, hanging onto his every word. You didn’t ponder too long on why your heart was racing or why you felt like you could barely breathe. Finally, he looked at you.
“I like you.”
Now you truly did find it hard to breathe.
“I like you so much I can barely focus when we cook, and it’s never happened to me before because I love cooking and I always pay close attention to what I’m doing. I also don’t want to lose a finger, you know? But now you’re around and it’s like I can’t help but look at you. You’re so bright and so passionate, and when you’re chopping vegetables you scrunch your nose a little and it’s one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen-”
In seconds you had your lips on his, pulling him closer with a delicate hand on the back of his neck. Wooyoung froze for only a millisecond before kissing you back. His lips were so pillowy and soft, you kissed him slowly, like you had all the time in the world. Lightly, his hand traveled up to rest on yours, which had moved onto his cheek. Kissing him felt like coming home after a long day. Warm and pleasant like the flame that swallowed your heart, chasing away the menacing grip fear had on it.
Wooyoung pulled away first if only to plant a small peck onto your lips before smiling.
“I was speaking,” he said.
“You were rambling.”
You both started laughing, hearts singing.
“What I wanted to say is that you shine in your own light and I can’t help but bask in it.”
The way he was looking at you, in ways no one ever could, could have melted you right then and there. You felt the flush rise to your cheeks, the hand that still rested on his cheek trembling lightly.
“I like you too, Jung Wooyoung,” you smiled. “More than I think I should.”
The quaint flower shop came into view, dispelling the memory, and a soft smile opened up on your lips. It didn’t look like there were any customers, so you stepped in. The colors of the pretty flowers that covered every inch of the walls always managed to put you in a better mood. You walked up to the counter, ringing the bell.
“Coming!” You heard from behind it, somewhere in the back, with a little shuffling and a loud thump. You jumped on your spot, giggling.
“You okay, Sang?” You asked, trying to peep. Your friend emerged a second later, clad in a white shirt, jeans, and his green apron, blowing a piece of his black fringe out of his eyes, a vase full of sunflowers in his hands.
“Oh, hey, what brings you ‘round?” He smiled, setting the vase on the counter.
“Just dropping by before going grocery shopping,” you shrugged, smiling back before you started playing softly with the leaves of the flowers near you. “How are you doing?”
“I’m good, I should be asking how you are,” he raised a brow, crossing his arms over his chest, “it’s the fourth time you visit this week.”
You rolled your eyes, used to his antics, standing to help when he nodded at you to follow him. The quietness of the shop eased your thoughts more often than not, plus, you enjoyed the company of your friend. Yeosang lived in your same apartment building and opened up his shop early in the morning, around the same time you had to leave for work. Oftentimes you shared a coffee before your obligations called. He complained about horrible customers and you complained about your horrible coworkers.
“I actually wanted to talk to you about something,” busy with an arrangement, he nodded you to the water lilies to his right. You reached for them with an arched brow, passing them. “A restaurant is opening down the street, if you’re interested in paying rent this month.”
You huffed a laugh, pretending to be offended.
“I’ll have you know I save my money, thank you very much.” He stood again, having finished his composition, watching you with an amused expression. “But I appreciate it,” you conceded. Yeosang smiled now, going back behind the counter as you followed.
“You should really check it out, even if it’s just temporary. It’d do you good,” a customer walked in, interrupting your chat. You nodded, leaving him to his work, shooting him one last smile before walking out. His cheerful Have a good day followed you out of the shop and into the now busier street.
Yeosang was right, you knew that much, but you still hesitated as you left the flower shop. There was uncertainty in your steps as you dared to walk down the street, looking ahead to spot the restaurant. Maybe you could go later that day, you could start with something easy like the grocery shopping you needed to do, to ease your nerves.
That was better, you decided, easing yourself into the day with your routine before upsetting it by facing something new. With newfound vigor, you resumed your walking, headed to your favorite greengrocer. A walk that lasted barely five steps, before you collided against another passerby.
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t-”
“Sorry! I didn’t mean to-”
As apologies spilled past your lips, your eyes finally caught sight of the person you so rudely slammed into. When you did, you stopped talking, just as your lungs stopped breathing for a long second.
His dark hair looked a little longer, and his smile was just as you remembered, if not a little softer. Breathtakingly dashing like the first time you saw him, even in his worst moments. Because the last time you saw him, things weren’t pretty. You threw around words you didn’t mean only to disappear from his life. Both of you were crying, eyes red and puffy, voice broken as you spoke. You thought you’d never see him again.
To your dismay, you realized right then and there that you weren’t ready to face him yet. You never prepared for the moment it would all come back, simply because you never thought it would.
“Thought I’d never see you again,” Wooyoung huffed, his polite smile falling in seconds.
“Yeah, me too,” you croaked, still in shock.
The moment stretched on for what felt like minutes, and was only probably seconds, as you desperately tried to come up with something to say, something that’d make sense. But your brain came up empty-handed, because what if he hated you? He should hate you. What if he just told you to fuck off and left? Just like you did years ago.
“So, what are you up to?”
And yet, here he was again, taking your life by storm. There was no way he was standing there, in front of you in the middle of a busy sidewalk, asking what was of your life. You blanked, producing a sort of confused and surprised noise. He had to be joking. You watched as a little amusement flashed in his eyes, the corner of his lips twitching upwards.
“Would you like to catch up over coffee?”
Your eyes must’ve been wide as saucers, not a single second of this was making sense to you.
“U-uh… Sure,” you shrugged, despite yourself.
Was this his way of showing you he was unbothered and had moved on? His long-awaited chance to brag about where he was in life? You didn’t know him as someone who would do that, but perhaps you deserved it. Maybe this was karma.
Awkward. It was all so painfully awkward: walking in tense silence beside him to the coffee shop down the street, trying to make small talk about the weather, stumbling over your words when ordering coffee, waiting for him to join you at the table near the exit. Just in case.
“You’re back home?” You finally asked as he sat down in front of you, desperate to find something, anything, to talk about and fill the silence that hung menacingly over your heads. After all, he wanted to catch up. Wooyoung nodded, slowly sipping his drink.
“Oh, you’ve been traveling then,” you mumbled, playing with your coffee cup, not daring to look up at him again.
“I was, yes.” It was hard to wrap your head around what was happening. In another life, this would all have been familiar. It could have been. Sharing a cup of coffee on a Thursday morning, talking about whatever, sharing cool recipes, and planning how or when to try them out. His presence wouldn’t make you want to simultaneously vomit and run and hide. Dug your own grave, huh?
“Only big names I imagine,” you forced a smile. He shrugged with a huff, a little bashful perhaps. It was all you needed to know you’d guessed right.
“What about you? What brings you here?” Wooyoung asked, pulling you out of your reverie. Despite the small, polite smile on his lips, his eyes were unreadable. Though, deep down, you knew the answer he wanted to hear. That you traveled all around the world and did big things - still were - and worked for big names. Achieved your dreams at the expense of his. The lump in your throat made it hard to swallow, to speak.
“Worked at Hwang’s for a while…” you managed to say through the bitterness. Wooyoung’s eyes nearly popped out of their sockets, jaw hanging open.
“Really? Wow, that’s… amazing! Doesn’t it have two Michelin stars?” Some of your guilt evaporated at the surprise and excitement in his voice, a lightness that was quickly crushed by your own disappointment.
“How’s it there?” There it was, the million-dollar question. You scoffed, bitter, looking at him, watching his face fall a little.
“I quit.” You shrugged.
“You? Quitting? What happened to the Y/N I knew?” Wooyoung was surprised, that much you could tell, but there was something else brewing in his brown eyes.
“Dead, gone and buried, apparently.”
Your words were nothing but bleak, with a little bitterness still in them. Sure, you did what was best for you and you were proud, but you couldn’t help but feel like you had let him down. And wasn’t that absolutely, wildly foolish?
“They offered me a job as head chef in their new restaurant, but I turned that down as well,” you rushed to explain, feeling like you had to, missing his furrowed brow.
“That’s…”
“Crazy?” You offered, cutting him off. Wooyoung scoffed.
“Well, yeah, but there must’ve been a good reason,” he shrugged. “You don’t have to justify your choices to me, Y/N.”
Your breathing faltered at his words and the fragility they held. Wooyoung had muttered them so softly, you could’ve lost them in the bustling atmosphere around you, and somehow both stabbed and healed your heart’s wounds.
A moment passed before he cleared his throat, speaking again.
“So, you’re unemployed,” you almost couldn’t fathom how quickly he got back to bubbly and upbeat. You nodded, still stunned.
“Great, me too.” Wooyoung smiled while you blinked repeatedly. Was he… happy?
“My friend told me about this one restaurant opening down the street-”
“They’re not opening,” he said, watching as your face fell. “Not yet at least.”
You furrowed a brow, confused, about to ask what he meant when he cut you off again.
“I still need to find a co-owner.”
For a moment, you didn’t hear the car, just outside, honking at a group of teenagers crossing the street despite the redlight. You missed the way a barista made a glass fall and shatter eliciting surprised gasps around the shop. You only saw Wooyoung in front of you, his expression between smug and daring to hope, eyes shining with a little fear. All you heard were the words that left his mouth and what they implied, along with your heart ringing in your ears.
“What do you want to do? Why did you decline the head chef position?” You blanched, head spinning, brain scrambling to form coherent words. His eyes burned with a fire in them that screamed determination, one you were used to seeing as he challenged a dish he was afraid to ruin. A fire you used to love so much and that, you found, still made your breath hitch.
“I-I just want to make good food and not run a kitchen of overworked, stressed, miserable and spiteful people,” you settled on, not daring to look away, not even when he leaned back in his seat, a smirk on his lips.
“How’d you like it to open a restaurant?”
“Let’s open our own restaurant,” you laughed at his words, turning your head to catch his enthusiastic smile and bed hair all over the place. He was so beautiful, bathing in the morning light of your room, that your heart jumped and hurt and sang all at once.
“What?! Is this post-nut clarity?” Wooyoung laughed, pulling you with him.
“Way to ruin the moment, love,” he quieted down. “I’m serious, though,” he was looking at you with amusement dancing in his eyes, and such adoration that sometimes it was hard to fathom it was directed at you.
“Mixing feelings with work is the recipe for disaster, Jung,” you found yourself saying, giggling when he pulled you into him, his hands leaving goosebumps in their wake. It was quiet for a while and you reveled in the warmth of the moment. Wooyoung often made you feel like anything was possible, like right now, huddled in a tangled mess of limbs and sheets despite the impending class you needed to leave for.
“I think we’d make it,” he whispered, quite believing the words he was saying. “And if it all starts falling apart we can hire chefs to cook and be the owners. Live somewhere tropical, rebuild our relationship…”
“That’s so sad, we wouldn’t be cooking at all!” you laughed, hiding in his chest and hearing a fake offended hey! from him. “You dream too big, Woo.”
“And you dream too small, my love.” He guided your face in front of his with gentle hands, bumping his nose with yours before kissing you until you were left breathless. When you pulled away, you finally saw the stars dancing in his eyes.
“I do have dreams,” you almost whispered, treading lightly on your own aspirations, opening up your heart for someone else to see. Someone who would understand and not call you crazy. Wooyoung nudged you, an expectant smile on his lips. “I want to travel all around the world and learn from the best of the best. Life’s a classroom, I don’t think I’ll ever want to stop.”
“Never?” he asked, not quite surprised, but more like impressed. He understood. You let out an elated giggle, almost cursing yourself for behaving like a schoolgirl.
“Never.” unable to resist, you pecked his lips once.
“That’s a wonderful dream, love.”
One of his hands came up to rest on your cheek, cradling it gently, looking at you as if you were the most prized possession of his. All over, warmth wrapped you up, and rose to your cheeks that he was still grazing his thumb over, light as a feather.
“I want to open a restaurant someday, ” he whispered, so close to you, looking into your eyes and sending sparks flying in your chest. “But I think I might just follow you to the ends of the world.”
His lips crashed on yours once more, sending your heart racing more than his words had. This might’ve been the closest you’d ever felt to heaven, with Wooyoung wrapped around you, canceling any and everything else. You knew, right then and there, that the fall was going to hurt like nothing had ever before.
Consommé was the most devilish dish you’d ever had the displeasure of cooking. And yet, its intricate cooking process demanded every last bit of your undivided attention. That was why you were sweating away in the kitchen, trying to achieve the perfect result through your rusty memory of the process, although you had no need for it. Well, except not thinking of your morning. You’d rather remember Chef Berrien’s voice as he dictated the recipe and the endless ways you could ruin it, than your encounter with Wooyoung.
A shiver ran down your spine, tingling all the way, when his words, the ones from earlier and the ones from back then, echoed in your mind; clashing, fighting, and leaving behind scorched earth.
You could hardly believe this was your life right now. Accepting would mean tying yourself down to this place, to Wooyoung. You let the thought simmer in your head, waiting for the familiar claustrophobia to bloom in your chest, suggesting you to run and never come back.
It didn’t come.
Instead, the thought of leaving pulled at your heartstrings. You liked it here. You liked your morning coffee shit-talking sessions with Yeosang, you liked meeting up with Seonghwa on his days off, you liked your greengrocers and the walk back through the park near home. You liked your apartment, you finally liked the disposition of your tools in your kitchen. You liked the thought of working with Wooyoung.
You dropped the ladle, splashing your skin with the hot soup. You hissed in pain, clutching your hand to your chest before assessing the damage. You walked the short distance to the sink, running your hand under cold water.
Well, you thought, there goes the clarification process.
-
You skipped breakfast with Yeosang that morning. For one, you were late despite the alarms, and, most importantly, you needed to talk yourself into actually meeting Wooyoung at the restaurant. The day before you’d left him with the promise of letting him know about the offer. You preferred not to think about how, for just a moment, you could see the determination falter in his eyes. Again. Wooyoung saved his number in your phone before letting you go.
After taking care of your slightly burned hand, you stared at your phone for all of twenty minutes before finally crafting the perfect text saying you’d meet him at the restaurant at ten.
And now, five minutes to ten, you were running down the street, dodging people left and right, trying to get to the closed-down restaurant. You couldn’t count the amount of sorry’s you’d thrown around when accidentally running into someone. Finally, the sign came into view, and so did Wooyoung.
“You made it,” he sounded vaguely surprised and you tried not to let it get to you, or to let it show on your face.
“So,” you cleared your voice after nodding. “How’d you find out about this?” He gestured for you to follow towards the entrance, producing the key from the back pocket of his black jeans.
“I used to like this place,” he easily opened the door, leading you inside the empty restaurant. From the outside the restaurant didn’t look like much more than a hole in the wall, but the inside was spacious enough. A small restaurant, fitting maybe twenty tables at best, but you liked the idea. By the looks of it, it must had been recently renovated. Wooyoung switched the lights on, allowing you to see better. “When I got back the owner told me he was thinking of closing, and I asked if he wanted to sell. He made a pretty good offer.”
“Huh,” you were still looking at the anonymous white walls and the few sleek black tables left behind, making your way to what you knew to be the kitchen. Stepping in, you gasped. It was perfect; an island kitchen slightly bigger than you’d imagined. Almost gleaming in its silver glory it stared back at you, inviting you in. You didn’t even mind the checkered floor as you walked across the space and took it in. Wooyoung stood by the door, leaning against its frame with his hands in his pockets, watching. It looked like he was holding his breath, and you knew why.
“What do you think?” his voice was just a little bit hesitant. You turned around with a smile.
“I love it,” you offered, noticing how he seemed to ease up the slightest bit.
“Ah, I knew you’d fall for the island kitchen,” Wooyoung scoffed, walking into the space as well.
“Not my fault it’s the best type of kitchen,” you raised your hands, hearing him snort.
“Debatable,” he muttered, now standing in front of you. There was amusement dancing in his eyes, a spark you realized just then how much you’d missed.
It hit you then, square in the chest, how much you really just missed him. He still seemed to know what you wanted even before you knew yourself. It happened then and it was happening now. Being in the kitchen with him felt electrifying, your hands itched to start cooking. You looked around once more, seeing yourself bustling around in this kitchen, Wooyoung at your side.
Never once did you regret the choices you’d made; your love for food had brought you all around the world, learning and cooking in the most beautiful kitchens, earning your praise felt like the biggest reward. Believing in yourself and your skill, your craft, and being able to perfect it was all you really needed. Maybe it was time to stop and breathe for a while, and put your experience to use. Because, no, you never regretted where your choices took you, except losing Wooyoung. Your compass, the one who never lost sight of your heart.
“Let’s do it.”
Wooyoung looked at you as if you’d grown a second head, letting out a surprised sound.
“I saved quite a bit in the last few years and we could ask for a loan. Quite frankly, I’ve always wanted to run a kitchen on my own terms,” you could hear it in your voice, the ambition faintly coming back to it, something you hadn’t heard in a while. You smiled seeing Wooyoung straighten up.
“We’d be running it together,” he lifted a brow, crossing his arms over his chest. You mirrored his stance.
“That’s good with me,” Wooyoung smirked.
“Then let’s do it.”
-
Oftentimes you asked yourself how you ended up here. You believed it almost impossible that you were, once again, sitting in front of Jung Wooyoung at an ungodly hour of the night, eating food you’d made as the radio softly played in the background. What was even less credible to you was how you were sitting in your restaurant, yours, discussing menu plans.
A month strong into the planning and designing, you were proud to say that you and Wooyoung were… friendly. Like coworkers were. Almost like long-lost friends would be. But it was fine because you got to stress Yeosang nearly every morning about how sometimes you both would slip into old habits and bicker like you used to and how that would confuse you. Then you’d talk Seonghwa’s ear off one night a week in front of your drinks, rambling on and on about how you’d catch yourself staring at him, blushing like an idiot, stumbling over your words.
Safe to say that your friends were tired, but deep down it surprised and comforted them to see you come back to life bit by bit.
It was all hard to wrap your head around because the last time you saw him still burned in the back of your mind. It was the giant elephant in the room you could never address, you could never pretend to not see. But Wooyoung was great at turning a blind eye, you realized. And you couldn’t really blame him either. You never expected to be in this sort of situation, you had quite literally run from it.
But you were afraid of misstepping, of crossing a line.
So, now, there you stood, at a crossroads; talk about it and watch this newfound truce crash and burn, or pretend like everything was fine. For now, discussing the menu with your co-owner would have to do.
“I think we should add that!” Wooyoung all but yelled, slamming his chopsticks down.
“And I’m telling you that I know the area!” You rebutted, swallowing your bite, before carrying on with your point. “There’s at least three other restaurants that do that, what’s missing is a gourmet place.”
“Will you let it go?” He sighed, throwing his hands up in the air. “If we get there, we get there, if we don’t, then we’re still making fantastic food!”
Wooyoung had a point, you knew he did. A valid one at that.
“You’re insufferable,” you conceded, rolling your eyes and resuming your eating, trying to hide the smile pulling at your lips.
“You love it,” he winked, picking up his chopsticks.
And just like that, he threw you back into your loop. How could you simply let it go when this felt so familiar? When it reminded you so much of how you were? Light and carefree. Happy. You hadn’t noticed your eyes roaming around his figure, taking in his long dark hair pulled back by a ponytail, the way his eyes seemed to shine in the dull light coming from the stupid lamp he’d insisted on bringing in.
This was his dream, wasn’t it? You remembered, because how could you forget the endless hours he’d spend talking about his own restaurant, managing his own kitchen, creating dishes, and cooking his favorites? You could tell by the small smile he sported as he ate, looking around the room with star-filled eyes.
You didn’t know quite how you fit into this. You never amounted that one conversation, years ago in your Paris apartment, up to anything more than daydreaming. Though, right now, the moment felt tangible, you could grasp it in your hands if you wanted to. He'd given you a new dream to chase right when you thought you were over.
“You’re looking at me weird,” Wooyoung waved his chopsticks in a circle around your face, eyebrows furrowed.
“Sorry,” your eyes fell back to the almost empty plate, moving the last bites of food around.
“I didn’t say it was bothering me,” his voice was lower, almost a whisper, and you felt your heart drop. When you looked up, you didn’t know what to make of his expression. It looked like he was contemplating his following words, and you were all but hanging from his lips. He stayed quiet, eyes downcast on his plate, and shot you a short smile.
You let the radio fill the silence between you, allowing the thoughts to pester your mind. Though, like a cup overflowing, there was little you could do to cage them and push them down.
“Wooyoung, were you-” his eyes rose to meet yours, and you stopped for a second, mulling the question over, savoring its bitter taste in your mouth before spitting it out as if it were a seed that ruined your bite. “Who were you going to open the restaurant with?”
His wide eyes told you all you needed to know, and yet his stunned silence pulled another set of words out of your lips.
“You said you needed a co-owner first…” you rasped, almost shocked you were still talking through the cotton in your mouth. Wooyoung set his chopsticks down, trying to hide the way his hands started trembling, sighing.
“We made a good team, didn’t we?” his voice was quieter, wondering. He shot you an uneasy smile, so short and so small you almost missed it. “I know you’re a great chef and we want this to be a great restaurant.”
“Yeah…” you whispered, feeling the weight of memories unloading on both your shoulders, their presence demanding the unwanted plunging into deep, murky waters. “Does it have, uhm… does it have anything to do with-”
“Let’s not open that can of worms, mh?” He cut you off immediately, sounding a tad harsher than he had before, rubbing salt into your matching wounds.
“I just-” It felt like you were gasping for air, grasping at any lifeline you were afforded, lost in the swirling sea that were his pained eyes.
“I know.”
A mangled victory, or a loss, the way his voice sounded resolute. It allowed no space for you to counterattack, to try and pry any other thought out of him. And you accepted it, simple and plain, with no complaints. You had no right to. Nodding, you averted your eyes, affording him space.
“I-” Wooyoung sighed, running a hand through his hair. The conflict in his mind was reflected on his face clear as day. Before his eyes were back on you, they looked around the room. “I missed you.”
Bearing his heart, that was what he was doing. It felt like, despite everything, he was still offering you a small piece of it. Your breath caught in your throat. Three words that held huge implications and a heavy past. One right answer, a truthful one, that could sound highly hypocritical of you. But you had to say it.
“I missed you, too.”
Wooyoung smiled, small and tentative, but still as warm as sunshine. You smiled back.
The night was as cold as you felt despite having his arms wrapped around you, offering you shelter from the biting wind. Tonight the twinkling lights of the city below you couldn’t offer their usual comfort. You knew what was going to happen as soon as you opened your mouth to speak; you’d be breaking his heart along with yours. But you had to, hadn’t you? Wooyoung would understand.
“Don’t you want to stay here forever?” He mumbled in your ear, his warm breath making you shiver. You kept staring out at the Parisian lights, heart sinking with every beat.
“I-” you sighed, squeezing your eyes shut, wishing there was a way to prevent the hurt you were about to put him through. Never mind about yourself, all you cared about was him. Always him. Then why are you doing this? Sounded something in the recess of your mind. You shushed it. The lump in your throat formed out of the blue, making it hard to utter the next words.
“I wish I could,” you whispered, hoping your words would get lost in the wind, bracing for impact when you felt him tense and pull away from you. A gust blew by, chilling you to the bone now that he wasn’t holding you anymore. The look in his eyes sparked burning regret in your heart, setting it aflame.
“What do you mean?”
He had taken a step back, confused eyes searching for yours. You couldn’t bear to look at him, not when you were about to break all the promises you’d made right along with his heart. What a coward.
“I was offered a job in New York,” you began, hearing his sharp intake of breath. “I took it… I leave next week.”
When you finally mustered enough courage to look back at him, you saw betrayal shining clear in his eyes, swirling in disbelief, his mouth slightly parted in surprise. It was almost as if you could hear his thoughts, and each of them cut a deeper wound.
How could you? Why didn’t you tell me? I would've been happy for you. We could’ve made other plans.
“Were you just going to disappear from my life forever, then?” He spat, a little angry, a little sad.
“No, Wooyoung, I-” you tried to reason, knowing very well that no excuse would hold. He scoffed bitterly, hiding his hands in the pockets of his jacket like a hurt kid. Already hard to talk through the burning in your throat, the tears springing in your eyes didn’t make the task any easier.
“Save it,” he cut you off, shaking his head. “I should’ve known. I hope you’ll find what you’re looking for there,” he made to go, but you couldn’t let him, not yet.
“Wouldn’t you have done the same?” He stopped dead in his tracks; you’d said the wrong thing. But you couldn’t hide your hand now that you’d thrown the stone. “Is it not our dream to learn and travel when all of this is done?”
Wooyoung shook his head as if he couldn’t believe it, and to some extent, you couldn’t either.
“No, I wouldn’t have, Y/N. It may be your dream but it isn’t mine. Not anymore, not since I met you. So, yeah, I would’ve given it all up,” he all but yelled, each word was like a punch in the gut. Despite the noise of the city below, the beat of silence that lingered sounded louder than any of it.
“Go to New York, love. It’s your dream after all,” he conceded, voice dying down and broken, softer, like some sort of realization had dawned upon him. He blinked away his tears, still, you refused to let yours fall.
In a second he was close to you again, his smell and warmth engulfing you once more. A sob broke through you when you felt his arms wrapping around you tight, and another was pulled from you when one of his hands came to softly rake through your hair. Wooyoung surrounded you with all he was, holding you tight, almost as if he loved you. Almost, you thought, because you knew the difference, for you had felt what it was to be loved – truly loved – by him. But you went and broke it. Now, you had to put love out of the question, and think only of duty. You had made your choice, after all, and he knew it too.
“Goodbye,” in an instant you were left on your own, cold, and watched as he walked away from you, his whisper resonating in your soul, breaking it with each echo.
If you chose to follow your dream, then why did it hurt so much?
-
Sundays used to be your day off. You’d wake up at midday, usually to a ray of sunlight harshly shining into your face until you could no longer bear its warmth. You’d roll out of bed and lazily proceed to tidy your apartment and rot on the couch for the remainder of the day. Now, though, you were a restaurant owner and Wooyoung insisted you should stay open on Sundays because two out of three of the restaurants in your area were closed. So, you rolled out of bed, taking just one second to admire the first rays of sunlight shining through the fading, dark night sky. You sped through your routine and breakfast, having sacrificed that slot of time in favor of five more minutes of sleep.
Despite the fast-approaching summer, the morning air was still rather chilly, and much quieter than the rumbling of cars and city rustle that you were used to. You didn’t have to squeeze past sleepy teenagers and angry old ladies on the bus and got to choose which seat to sit in. You didn’t mind early Sundays.
In no time you’d open the restaurant. Today you’d convinced Seonghwa and Yeosang to drop by for lunch; you needed them to test out the menu you and Wooyoung had carefully crafted. Of course, at the mention of free food, both of them agreed, so there wasn’t much convincing involved after all. A sort of test run before the grand opening.
The restaurant stood before you in the quiet street, looking close to the eye. You smiled proudly, producing the key from your bag, opening the door, and closing it behind you after walking in. The room was quiet, the only indication of someone being in there was the rustle and faint light coming from the kitchen.
“Hey, Woo,” he was already there, setting out pans and pots. You walked in, reaching for your jacket.
“Hi!” Although his head was hidden in a cupboard, you could hear his cheery voice loud and clear. “Are you ready?”
When he emerged, he was sporting a happy smile, contagious enough to make you chuckle.
“As I’ll ever be.”
Wooyoung smiled at you, beckoning you over to the station where a copy of the menu lay. You sure had your work cut out for the day. Up until then, between the furnishing and taking care of the more bureaucratic aspect of opening a restaurant, cooking together hadn't been common. You were thrilled to finally share the kitchen with him again.
“Hey! The rolling pin is there to keep you off my half of the counter,” you huffed, trying your best not to let your irritation show. Not while you were trying to close dumplings perfectly.
“Oh, come on!” He protested, “I can’t believe you’d still do that, look at how much space we have!”
“Yeah, and somehow, you’re still taking up most of it,” Wooyoung grumbled under his breath, finally moving a few of his bowls and pans to make space for you.
“Gee, thanks,” although you weren’t trying to rile him up, you still ended up falling back into old habits.
“Oh my-” he rolled his eyes at your sarcasm, moving a couple more things, “You’re the bane of my existence.”
“You literally asked me to be your co-worker!” You laughed, shocked, but amused.
“And there’s not a day I don’t regret it,” with his nose in the air, trying and failing to hide a smile, Wooyoung resumed his meat slicing. You scoffed, not really offended. It was so easy to breathe when things felt as light as they did. A smile threatened to open up on your face, but you had an act to keep up.
Silence used to be rare between the two of you, yet you liked it now. There was no awkward space to fill anymore, not a single word to be wasted. You worked in tandem, like a well-oiled machine, chuckling at Wooyoung’s occasional jokes and exchanging instructions. It felt good. It felt like it used to.
“Are you nervous?” You asked him as you finalized the prepping for the second course. Wooyoung looked up, flashing that smile of his that could rival the sun.
“Not really,” he shrugged. “Are you?”
You nodded, avoiding his eyes and focusing on the bowl under your nose. The sauce you prepared to marinate the fish had a pungent note it shouldn’t have had. You didn’t notice him slipping closer to you, right at your side. Wooyoung was leaning on the counter, facing you.
“You’ve got nothing to be worried about,” his voice aimed to soothe, and it did, sweet like honey. “Are you or are you not one of the best chefs in town?”
You looked up at him, scoffing, ignoring the heat on your face that his closeness brought along.
“See, now you’re exaggerating!”
“I’m not.”
“Are, too!” A soft laugh escaped the two of you, and when he looked at you, eyes so full of hope and happiness, your breathing stopped for just a second. “But you’re right, it’s gonna be okay, I’m just… I don’t know, I want them to like what we made.”
“They’re gonna,” he shrugged. Only when you gave him a questioning look he answered. “Because we made it.”
It looked like Wooyoung still knew what to say and when to say it to put your nerves at ease.
-
“Can I have some more?”
“Me too!”
“You can’t ask that!”
“Says who?”
“Alright, we’ll make it,” Wooyoung quelled the discussion that was about to start quickly, coming back into the kitchen with empty plates.
Two of his friends had joined yours for lunch, not that the food was lacking, but it seemed that Yeosang and San had promptly bonded over their love for one particular dish. Gamjatang, which wasn’t even on the menu, the two were just bottomless pits, apparently. The only one coming to your aid with restaurant etiquette was Seonghwa, whose reprimanding went unheard. Hongjoong stuck to silent side-eyeing, which barely helped.
“Should we consider adding it to the menu?” Wooyoung joked, coming over to the stove where you stood, already heating up what was left of the broth from the previous batch. You thanked your lucky star you had some ready, or else they’d had to wait hours to eat.
“Let’s make it available only after eleven, though.”
He laughed, reminding you how you closed at midnight while washing and cutting up the mung bean sprouts, crown daisy leaves, perilla leaves, and green chilies you needed to add later on. You went for the pork bones, potatoes, and cabbage leaves.
Wooyoung set his bowl of vegetables close to the stove, ready for you whenever.
“Do you need more seasoning base?” He asked as you put your portion of ingredients into the pot.
“Yeah, there’s not much left,” you looked at him, waiting for your word to start. “Thanks.”
He smiled, getting to work quick.
As everything simmered and cooked, the two of you stood in front of the stove, silent, side to side. Outside, you heard your friends all talk and laugh, but they sounded miles away. Once again, you thought you knew what was running through his head. The night when he taught you how to cook the dish, the way he followed your every step with an encouraging smile. How your heart fluttered when he kissed your lips right after his first bite, saying that there was no way he was ever going to cook it again if yours tasted much better. How one night you tipsily tried to cook it together, almost spilling the batch of broth you saved in the fridge and ruining it all, but could only laugh until your stomachs hurt because somehow it was the funniest thing ever. After all, they plagued your thoughts as well.
When the timer went off and he looked at you like a deer caught in headlights, you smiled, trying to ease away the tension that had bubbled up, going to kill the flame and plate the dish.
You passed him a full bowl with shaking hands, praying he didn’t hear the way your heart was hammering in your chest.
“Maybe you should take away the wine,” Seonghwa sported a light frown on his lips when you made your way to the table with the other bowl in your hands. You furrowed a brow, noticing the way San and Yeosang were giggling a little too loudly, and how the former was particularly flushed, only after setting the dish in front of him.
“Good idea,” Wooyoung snickered, scurrying back into the kitchen with the bottle. You watched him go, debating if to follow or give him space. You decided to stay, asking your guests how they liked the food.
Seonghwa ended up giving you precious input and feedback, over the laughter coming from the opposite end of the table. It made you smile. Despite how interested you were in your friend’s recap of the things he appreciated the most about appetizers, you couldn’t help but glance a little worriedly at the kitchen doors from time to time. Wooyoung was still in there.
“Alright, we should go,” Hongjoong, who had simply complimented your cooking with a polite smile, spoke up after a while. San protested a little but stopped his efforts to stay pretty quickly when his friend said he was going to have no ride home.
The two made their way to say their goodbyes to Wooyoung in the kitchen, leaving you with your friends.
“We should go, too,” Yeosang stood, walking over to the doors with you and Seonghwa.
“Thank you guys for coming,” you quickly hugged them both. “Drop by whenever.”
“You know I will,” Yeosang giggled, making you smile.
“Keep it up!” Seonghwa said, walking out first. You waved them both off, and when you turned around, you were faced with San and Hongjoong. The former complimented your food, saying he’d bring over friends and family, rambling a bit. You giggled as he spoke, thanking him.
“Thank you for having us, the food was delicious,” Hongjoong watched over San making his way out of the restaurant after saying his goodbyes, turning to you with a small smile. “Can I ask one thing of you?”
Your brow furrowed, but you nodded quickly. He sighed.
“I know you two have a complicated past,” he started, sending a jolt of anxiety through you. “And I see you’re doing great despite it, so, please, just… don’t hurt him again.”
“I would never,” you were furiously nodding, suddenly your throat felt a little dry, hands all clammy.
“Thank you,” Hongjoong smiled, walking out as well, leaving you dumbfounded and staring at their disappearing figures.
You waited in silence for a while, mulling his words over in your head. When you turned around and saw Wooyoung leaning against the kitchen door’s frame with a bright, wide smile adorning his lips, the sight almost gave you a heart attack. He laughed loudly seeing your spooked reaction, making a smile appear on your face. His laughter only served to make your heart stutter like butterfly wings, having barely recovered from the surprise, making you giggle as well.
Wooyoung looked so happy that you felt you could burst at the seams.
“They liked it!” You could barely contain your excitement as you locked up and started to make your way over to him, almost with a skip in your step.
“They did,” he smiled back, eyes scanning your figure until you were right up in front of him. Not even thinking twice, you let your arms sneak around his shoulders, pulling him into a bone-crushing hug. You even swayed side to side. Wooyoung laughed happily, his own arms around your waist to pull you closer.
“I’m so happy,” you murmured when your excitement quelled. Your chin was resting atop his shoulder, and his on yours. When he spoke, quietly, you could hear the smile on his lips right against your ear.
“I’m glad,” he said. “Me too.”
It was quiet. For the first time since that morning there were no friends laughing at the table, no bickering in the kitchen along with the sizzling of the pans, chopping on the cutting board, and rumbling of the pots.
Just you and him.
Your heart was still racing, over the moon for the success of your menu, but also quickened by his close proximity. Once realization struck that you’d pulled him into you, you were quick to let go, though his arms around your waist wouldn’t let you wander far.
“Sorry, I-”
“It’s okay,” the look in his eyes was enough to send your heart to your feet, air stuck in your lungs, and take you back in time, just for a second. It was all it took for you to want to pull away from him as if you’d gotten shocked. You found that you couldn’t. Not when Wooyoung held you a little tighter, searching for anything in your eyes that would prompt him to stop leaning even a breath closer.
Frozen in time, in your spot, your grip on his kitchen jacket grew impossibly strong.
When his nose softly brushed against yours, as if he’d sensed your mind wandering far and wide and wanted to bring you back to him, and you saw how his half-lidded eyes were holding a simple question, you pulled back.
“Should we get to cleaning up?”
Wooyoung’s eyes closed, for a fleeting second, before he started nodding.
“Yeah, we’re gonna be here all night,” he cleared his voice, arms falling from around you. He offered a smile so small that it barely showed, the moment gone as soon as it came. You watched as he disappeared behind the kitchen doors, shoulders dropping and eyes falling close.
You gave yourself a moment, just one, to relish in his closeness. The closest he’d ever been to you in years, something that used to be so familiar and still sparked the same goosebumps, the same erratic heartbeat. You sighed, following after him.
-
You couldn’t sleep. You hadn’t for a good week.
Between the imminent opening of the restaurant and the newfound awkwardness between you and Wooyoung, your head was so full of swirling thoughts that, as soon as you closed your eyes, it prevented you from enjoying one singular night of rest. They just kept going, growing into a never-ending spiral of what-ifs and exploding into a hurricane of beating yourself up.
By now you’d given up on trying to make sense of your feelings. All you knew was that you wanted to keep Wooyoung to your side, co-worker, friend, or lover, it didn't matter. Now that he was back into your life, you didn’t want to risk losing him again. Though, it got increasingly hard to ignore how you wished he would stay with you once you closed the restaurant. How you wanted him to hold you like he used to, how you wanted to tell him every day just much of your love and devotion he had.
It was still dark outside when you closed the door to your apartment behind you. Almost without thinking, you’d thrown the covers off of yourself and gotten out of bed, put on the first clean clothes you found, and got out of the house. The cold, crisp air of the night hit you right in the face, waking you up like an icy splash of water would have. You pulled your jacket closer around your body, starting the walk to the restaurant. The keys jiggled in your hand, one of the few sounds in the lonesome streets.
Your heart had decided the way for you before your mind could catch up.
You’d always found solace in cooking. It allowed your mind to relax, and think about what was right in front of your nose, slicing through all your doubts and worries like a knife. With each step you followed, each accomplished passage towards the perfect result, you felt lighter and lighter. Then Wooyoung came along. Never could you have predicted that something else in your life would’ve been able to bring you the same comfort and brightness as cooking.
Whatever peace and happiness you’d found in your passion, you’d also found in him. He set you alight. You’d been dumb and wrong enough to think that the feeling that came along with him could be replaced.
But how could it? Once you let go if it, of him, Wooyoung had haunted all of your what-ifs. All of your darkest nights could only brighten up if you thought of his infectious laugh, his soft kisses, and his kind words.
Reaching the restaurant brought you back out of your thoughts. You were here now, by some fateful design, with him again. You’d do anything not to lose your brightest star again.
“Couldn’t sleep?”
You closed the backdoor behind you with a jolt, not expecting Wooyoung to be sitting at a table, illuminated only by the light coming from his beloved lamp.
“What’re you doing here?”
Ever so slowly, you made your way to him, trying to calm your racing heart. He raised his shoulders, avoiding your eyes a second later, shrugging as if he had no answer to your question. You sat with him, noticing just then the few papers scattered on the wood.
“What’s on your mind?” The question fell from your lips in a quiet whisper, almost afraid to disturb the silence hanging in the air. You still knew him, after all, maybe even more than you gave yourself credit for. He sported that furrow in his brow, the one that lightly creased his smooth skin, that only showed up when something had been bothering him.
“I-” he sighed, closing his eyes. When he opened them again, they didn’t waste a single second to find yours. Your mouth went dry.
“You know what I hate most? That sometimes I hate you, sometimes I hate myself, but always I miss you. And I never stopped torturing myself with the same questions over and over, why would you go? Did our dreams mean nothing to you? Did I mean nothing to you?” A bitter, void laugh fell from his lips. “But you’ve gotta move on, right?”
Oh.
Oh.
Heart in your throat, you were left speechless in front of his innermost thoughts. Thoughts you never imagined could be plaguing his mind still. But how could you miss it now? His eyes were begging for answers, after all this time, as if the dam had finally broken. You couldn’t bear to see them be so pleading, so misty.
“That’s not true, I,” the words died in your mouth as you choked on them. “You must know it,” reduced to a whisper by the weight of truth, you tried to salvage what you’d so carefully rebuilt.
“Do I?” He sounded so helpless, your brain scrambled in all directions to find a way to convey how so untrue it all was. “You left me, Y/N, and sometimes I'm still there.”
A gasp left your lips, his words squeezing the air out of your lungs.
“We’re doing it now, isn’t it enough?”
Wooyoung shook his head, shoulders dropping in disbelief as he scoffed. Despite the dim light, from across the table, you could see his red-rimmed eyes begging you to catch on. You did, you had the second he started speaking, but you’d still said the wrong thing.
“You’re so dense,” head thrown back, hands on his face, you waited for him to speak again. “Tell me why did you go.”
Not a question. Up against the wall, you felt the way your heart fell to your stomach, how nerves were tugging at it painfully. He needed this, and you were willing to give answers.
“I didn’t think,” you started, feeling so small under his gaze. “The only thing on my mind was that I’d made it. Selfishly, I thought you’d understand. I… I never meant to hurt you, and I know it sounds like bullshit, but it’s true. And when you told me to go, for a split second, I thought we could make it. I realize now how stupid I was. How there were at least ten ways in which I could’ve handled it better. I wish I’d fought for us,”
“I’m sorry. I really am, I-” Unshed tears started to run down your cheeks, wetting your mouth with salt. “There’s nothing I regret more than letting you go.”
“We were meant to be, love,” his broken whisper was a sinking stone in your chest. Lifting your eyes to meet his, you saw the tear tracks on his desperate face matching yours.
“But we were not meant to last,” there were few ways you could describe how your heart was hurting as you muttered the words, hand reaching forwards on the table. You didn’t think Wooyoung would hold on to it until he did. Fingers intertwined, you both held on painfully tight as if by letting go you’d get lost in the current the sea of your words had provoked. Each other’s buoy in a storm of unsaid words and unresolved, muddy feelings, so strong that with nothing they could tear you apart.
You cried immersed in the dark silence of the restaurant hall, the place that crowned your dreams, listening to the other’s quiet sobs.
“I’m sorry, forgive me,” you choked out again, trying to find his face past your tears. Wooyoung reached out to brush them away, his hands just as soft as you remembered, if not more careful. The moment his skin grazed yours, a shiver ran down your spine, electrified by such simple contact. His hand lingered for a long second, cradling your cheek before all you felt was its cold absence.
He stood up first, only to walk around the table and stamp a kiss on the crown of your head, his hand holding your shoulder. You froze, barely hearing how he murmured something about seeing you in the morning, barely breathing. What you did hear was the closing door, a sign you’d been left alone with your thoughts in the dimly lit room, knowing your ignorance had broken his heart again.
-
You didn’t know how to fix it.
Standing and cooking side by side felt off again. You were walking on eggshells, treading on a fine line to avoid ticking off another bomb. If the weight of apologizing had been lifted off your chest, something much heavier now resided upon it. Knowing something had changed yet again, all because of how you’d acted. What you’d said.
“You want to make ramen noodles? From scratch?”
In the middle of cleaning up part of the station, you couldn’t help but let surprise seep into your voice. Wooyoung stared, nodding.
“I thought we already made enough to last us at least two days…” You let your words fade out, not wanting to start an argument. His jaw set and you realized your efforts had been in vain.
“I’d rather be safe than sorry, at least until our new hires come in,” he shrugged, going to preheat the oven. He really was serious.
You wondered why he was going through with this; you ran out of kansui, which was already hard enough to find, let alone expensive. In its absence, you’d need to prepare a substitute for it: baking soda that had to be baked in the oven for at least an hour to act properly instead of the kansui. It was such a waste of time when you had more pressing matters to attend to. Ones that didn’t need the help of your brigade.
Breathing in deeply and deciding that keeping peace was essential, you assessed how Wooyoung was just lining the baking sheet with parchment paper and spreading the baking soda over it. You went to retrieve the whole wheat and bread flours you’d need in an hour, trying to keep frustration at bay. You’d think about the salt and riboflavin later. When you came back with the sacks, Wooyoung was already cleaning the rolling pins and pasta machine. With a grunt, you set them down on the counter, watching as he jolted in surprise.
“I’ll go call our supplier while we wait on the oven,” you really didn’t mean for your voice to sound so clipped. He seemed not to care, simply giving you a nod and going on with his task.
You left the kitchen almost stomping your feet in frustration, sitting down at the table furthermost from it. Whatever game Wooyoung was playing, it needed to stop now. You had tried time and time again, in the last few days, to get anything out of him. To try and patch things up and salvage them as best as you could. But you guessed he needed time, and with the opening just around the corner, you decided it was best to let him be. As long as you could work well together, everything would be fine.
Except the wall he’d put up was so high that you felt it was impossible to climb it or break through.
The sound of the door opening brought you back to reality, reminding you that you needed to find the supplier’s contact and call, murmuring something about being closed to whoever had just come in.
“I figured,” the voice made every hair on your skin stand, plunging you back into prickly, cold, anxious times. As you looked up, you could barely believe your eyes.
“Mr. Hwang,” his name left your lips in an incredulous whisper.
“It’s been a while,” he looked around, coming in. His eyes were inspecting thoroughly everything they could lay themselves on, scrutinizing all that might be out of place, or all that wasn’t, and had the ability to spark envy in an enviable man. “Nice place.”
“How may I help you?”
“I have an offer to make you.”
Wooyoung nearly stumbled on his feet. When he’d walked out of the kitchen to see if anything had come of your call with the supplier, the last thing he’d expected was seeing you sat at a table with your old boss, having a chat, exchanging laughter. He’d quickly retreated, leaving you to it, seeing red. He didn’t need to know what was going on, nor did he want to. Or at least that’s what he kept telling himself as he stared, unable to do anything else, at the timer of the oven ticking by. Every second you sat out there, was a second he needed to reason with himself and find out what the menacing grip that held his heart was. All Wooyoung knew was that he wished you’d walk through the kitchen doors, a bright smile on your face, ready to get back to work.
And when you did, he couldn’t quite figure out the look on your face. He was dying to ask what Hwang wanted, no matter what it was, he needed whatever words you’d utter to soothe his burning curiosity. But you never spoke, keeping up your diligent work even past the timer dinging, through the kneading of the dough, its thirty-minute rest, and the several compressions through the pasta machine. He observed you carefully, like he always had, as you used a long knife to cut the noodles by hand as he was occupying the noodle cutter of the machine. Were you slipping through his fingertips again? His eyes on you had always felt like an encouraging, gentle caress. Always looking after and out for you. Wooyoung never noticed or wasn’t fully aware, that sometimes they still did. More often than not you felt the need to step away, or look away, under his gaze, caving in under his affection.
You felt that you didn’t deserve to be looked at so tenderly, not anymore.
He searched for words to say as the several pieces of dough were turned into noodles, but nothing came to mind. Nothing sounded right, not even in his head. Wooyoung let silence win this battle, preferring to let the whirring of the machine and the slicing of your knife talk, trying to work out all the tangled threads that were his thoughts. It was easy to mess up the noodles and have them stick together in an unsalvageable way; then you’d have to make them into dough again and put it through the machine, compressing it until it was ready to be cut up. He tried to treat his thoughts with the same care as noodles to avoid starting over. But Wooyoung wasn’t having the same luck.
Your muttering from the other side of the kitchen prompted him to look your way, struggling to find some space in the refrigerator for your sheet-pans. He hid his smirk, tossing the last of his noodles with cornstarch.
“Why?” You turned around, hands on your hips, irritation barely at bay. Wooyoung raised a brow, doing his very best at pushing your buttons.
“Why did we make so many fucking noodles when we are stocked full?”
“Because we need them,” he shrugged. “They’re tedious to make from scratch, it’ll make our lives easier.”
“Then you make space for them,” you huffed, hastily walking over to the dishwasher to start filling it with the utensils you’d just finished using.
“What did Hwang want?”
Wooyoung bit his tongue, watching how your back straightened at his question. He’d tried to sound casual, but the question turned out to be anything but. He couldn’t keep it in anymore, the longer he did, the more his nerves tested his peace of mind. Wooyoung watched as you froze, halting your movements, before turning to face him again. The furrow of your brow as you raked your eyes over him accelerated his heartbeat in mysterious ways, waiting with bated breath for your answer.
“Nothing important,” but it was to him. Wooyoung’s thoughts had taken him places he didn’t want to revisit. His heart had been swallowed with an all-consuming and unkindly familiar pain at the idea of you leaving him behind. Hwang had offered you a lot in the past, afforded you to realize your dreams, he knew that much. What could he give you, then?
“Then why did you take so long talking to him?” One way or the other, Wooyoung had to exorcize the sinking feeling in his chest along with the overpowering green monster resurfacing with all its might. The only way afforded to him now was to venomously spit his words to you.
“I’m not trying to put us in a hard place with our number one competitor,” you closed the loaded dishwasher behind you, coming closer to him, clouding his senses. He scoffed with a roll of his eyes and you lifted a brow, crossing your arms.
“Fine, be that way,” you carelessly threw the towel that was resting on your shoulder upon the counter. “He came back to try and persuade me to work for him again.”
And there they were, the words Wooyoung had feared the most. Someone who would whisk you away from him again as he watched helplessly, feeding into his fears.
“I said no, Woo…” your voice put a halt to every thought drowning him, your eyes full of the same softness your voice was. Giving up the fight, extinguishing the fire of his worries, at the cost of your disappointment. You swallowed the bitter bite. “Did you really think I’d go back, that I’d leave this? That I’d leave you?”
His silence was answer enough. You nodded, pressing your lips together.
“Well, I wouldn’t.”
You weren’t going to let him think like that, not now.
“I wasn’t happy there, and there’s not a single thing he could offer that would make me as happy as you do.”
Wooyoung watched, stunned into silence, while you got rid of your jacket and murmured something about still having to call the supplier. The timid smile you gave him, eyes full of warm hope, moved something inside him that had been slowly waking up ever since you bumped into him down the street months ago.
-
For so long, he’d tried to move on. In the end, it turned out that you wanted different things from him, and he had to accept that. Wooyoung couldn’t convince you to stay if you wanted to leave. So, with his heart aching and bursting at the seams with the hope that eventually you’d be back, he let you go. There was no way he could describe how he felt when he saw you again. Surprise struck him, leaving him disoriented for a long moment before his mouth spoke for him. As if his body had reacted to the presence of yours, remembering what it felt like to have you close.
No, Wooyoung wasn’t surprised that he so readily welcomed you back into his life. You were trying, that much he could see, but he was, too. There was a battle going on inside his head that left him frustrated and confused when it came to you, to his feelings for you. His thoughts laid their armor down only in your presence. His heart knew you were the only one he’d ever truly loved. A love that bloomed at the wrong time, a fragile flower that didn’t survive the winter. Wilted and withered, you’d left him to mend the gashes.
He did, only if it meant learning how to be without you, burning with the hope that one day, if the time was right, together you could grow flowers anew.
The chance was right there for him to take, and yet. It had taken him just a couple of hours after closing the kitchen to decide he needed to see you, and set things straight once and for all.
“What are you doing here?”
The sun was just about to set, gilded light flowing into your apartment from the window, bathing you in its gold. Wooyoung’s breath caught. For a fleeting instant, nothing else existed besides your confused pout and his erratic heartbeat.
“Can we talk?”
You nodded, opening the door wider to let him in, gesturing for him to follow to the kitchen. The sweet aroma hit him first, enveloping him, and he saw the cutting board in the sink after. It didn’t take him long to figure out you were making blackberry jam.
“You’re stressed,” the words left his lips before he could realize he’d spoken them, your head jerking in his direction as you kept stirring the pot, only to nod right after.
“Well, yeah, the opening’s just around the corner now and we-” your eyes fell back on the stove, briefly avoiding his. “What did you want to talk about?”
Wooyoung hesitated. He didn’t know. Rather, he was sure he needed to make things right. Clean the suffocating air of uncertainty when it came to you and what you were to him. What he was to you. You two were always good at dancing in the dark but now, in the light of day, it was hard to fall back into rhythm.
“I’m sorry about the noodles,” he bit his tongue. Way to start.
How could he say what he wanted to when his head was on fire? Still, you were there, waiting, occasionally stirring your jam, making his heart skip. Wooyoung sighed.
“I couldn’t stand the thought of you leaving.”
Your hand halted its gentle movements, he saw your knuckles turning white.
“Wooyoung-”
“No, let me say this,” he was pretty sure his lungs almost failed him when you turned to look at him, wide eyed, hanging onto his words. “I don’t really know how to act around you. At first, I wanted to be mad. Just a little bit, but found out quickly that after the anger was gone, there wasn’t much left. Just the part of me that wondered if you’d ever come back, if you missed me like I missed you. And if I push all the confusion back, it’s as easy as breathing. I never expected to want you with me as much as I do.”
You turned off the flame, walking closer.
“I never meant you any harm,” you were picking at your fingers, almost subconsciously, just like Wooyoung’s hand reached out to twine with yours, halting your nervous motions. “I‘m sorry that I let you down, and that I hurt you.”
“I know,” he squeezed your hand with a small sigh, eyes cast on them. “We weren’t meant to last.”
The words bitterly echo in the quiet kitchen, almost lost in the burbling coming from the stove. Wooyoung was tempted to let go of your hand and walk out the door, fragile like a house of cards, as if it cost him his whole heart to tell you the truth. To expose his confusion in fear it may be an imposition.
“No, Woo, not when I was so confused and only put my dreams first. Not when we had so much that we would’ve held each other from,” your watery smile hit him square in the chest, your words feeding his worries. “But I think we were always meant to be. I still… I’ve always held so much love for you.”
Wooyoung stopped breathing, letting the sweet taste of your words wash over him.
“Can we start over?” you asked, tentative, searching his face for any sign that you may have crossed a line. “I want to be by your side, at your pace, we’ll be whatever you want us to be. I wasn't ready then but I am now, and I know it'll take time but I want you to know that I'll be there. No matter how long, I'll always be there.”
The unruled hope, that he’d been fighting to keep at bay, finally broke free and sparked a fire in his chest that swallowed up his heart, holding it in a fierce grip, burning. Your hopeful, misty eyes told him more than words could, more than he could ever dare to imagine. He had longed to see them from this close again.
“Didn’t you say that mixing feelings with work is the recipe for disaster?”
Behind the carelessly amused shrug of your shoulders, your untamed smile shined with bright happiness. The hand that wasn’t holding his tentatively rose to cup his cheek and Wooyoung wasted no time in leaning in and basking in its warmth.
“I think we’d make it.”
Your promise was enough for him. Wooyoung rested his forehead against yours, finding home in your sweet perfume once again. You were finally back into his arms, to hold and to love. Once your lips met his hesitantly, almost afraid at first but feverishly at last, the sweet and pleasantly tart taste of your kiss assured his head and heart that everything would be alright.
#jung wooyoung#jung wooyoung fluff#jung wooyoung angst#jung wooyoung fanfic#ateez jung wooyoung fluff#ateez jung wooyoung#wooyoung fluff#wooyoung oneshot#wooyoung fic#wooyoung fanfic#wooyoung x reader#ateez wooyoung angst#ateez#ateez fic#ateez fanfic#ateez fluff#kpop fic#ateez angst#wooyoung ateez#wooyoung angst#jung wooyoung x reader#wooyoung x y/n#wooyoung x you
569 notes
·
View notes
Text
Someone out there...
Serieslist
Pairing: bunny!hybrid!jungkookxhuman!readerxbunny!hybrid!wooyoung
Boy groups involved: BTS & ATEEZ
Genre: angst, fluff, smut, neighbour au, hybrid au.
Summary: the two bunny hybrids were terrified of the cruel world. Will they be able to live their life?
Lemme know if you wanna be added to the permanent or this series’s taglist<3
BTS and ATEEZ masterlist
Masterpost
Do not repost, plz
Just for reference, this is how Jungkook and Wooyoung look in their bunny forms—
Jungkook. Wooyoung.
[ongoing🥀] [paused]
Part: 1 In the empty house.
Part: 2 In the attic.
Part: 3 In the connection.
Part: 4 In the window.
#ateez#bts#ateez angst#ateez fluff#ateez smut#bts angst#bts fluff#bts smut#ateez fanfic#ateez fic#ateez imagines#bts fanfic#bts fic#bts imagines#ateez wooyoung#ateez jung wooyoung#ateez wooyoung angst#ateez wooyoung fluff#ateez wooyoung smut#bts jungguk#bts jungkook#bts jeon jungguk#bts jeon jungkook#jungkook x reader#jungkook angst#jungkook smut#jungkook fluff#jungkook fic#bunny hybrid jungkook#bunny hybrid wooyoung
102 notes
·
View notes
Text
texting fiancé!ateez about their Coachella performance as you weren't able to attend it
author: bvidzsoo
pairing: ot8 x reader
tw: cursing
genre: smau, reactions, idol!au, fiancé!au
a/n: well, I can 100% surely say Ateez wrecked all Atiny with their performance at Coachella today (or yesterday for some), and maybe this is my way of coping??? Will I be over it soon? Certainly not lol, when I catch you Song Mingi, you better have prepared yourself cuz I ain't ever again letting you out of the dungeon, sir. Let me know your thoughts, as always, I hope these are good enough and enjoyable. Thank you for checking it out! (divider)
⚞ Masterlist ⚟
↳Perm. taglist: @orshii @jjoongstar @tinyelfperson @thestarskiller @zuuhaaa @aaa-sia @sharksandminhos @gong-fourz
❀ complete the forms if you're interested! ^^
#bvidzsoo#cromernet#ateez fake texts#ateez#ateez ot8#ateez smau#ateez scenarios#ateez headcanons#ateez drabbles#ateez imagines#ateez oneshot#ateez smut#ateez fluff#ateez angst#ateez fanfic#ateez crack#ateez x reader#hongjoong x reader#seonghwa x reader#yunho x reader#yeosang x reader#san x reader#mingi x reader#wooyoung x reader#jongho x reader
880 notes
·
View notes
Text
ateez as mafia boyfriends (christmas special)
genre: mafia!ateez x fem!reader, fluff, angst, smut, crack, brainrot and smutfest of mafia x christmas tropes
length: 13.8k
c/w: nsfw scenes - mdni, explicit language (dirty talk, swearing, insults), graphic depictions of death, violence, blood & injuries, weapons, heavy & mature themes (murder, abduction, corruption), pet names (kitten, babe, baby, love, sweetheart)
a/n: this one’s for yumi (@sorryimananti-romantic), mafia anon and everyone who’s sent in an ask about mafia!ateez before 🫶 loosely based on aammwffy but this is still a standalone fic not part two thank you for coming to my ted talk 😙✌️ merry christmas y'all
hongjoong
the stocking in your hand jerks when you suddenly feel it
it’s a black stocking that hongjoong has made for wooyoung from out of a spare shirt
there are already several other hand-made stockings hanging on nails that he has hammered into the wall of the warehouse
and this whole ‘ateez’s mob boss couple decorates the gang’s old warehouse for christmas’ shenanigan would have been cute and wholesome…
if not for the vibrator that is currently pulsing inside your throbbing pussy
“why’d you stop, kitten?” hongjoong murmurs into your ear from behind your shoulder, knowing very well the reason why is currently in the pocket of his black slacks
when you struggle to answer, he snakes the hand that isn’t toying with the remote around your waist to the front of your pants
“hmm? what’s wrong?” he asks teasingly
your knees buckle when he suddenly cups your core, pressing the vibrator further into you as he switches it to a higher setting
gripping onto his forearm to ground yourself, you’re unable to stop yourself from moaning at the feeling of his muscles rippling underneath your fingertips while he grinds his hand against you
but as soon as you feel your high approaching, it is ripped away from you
hongjoong switches the vibrator off and removes his hand
you are close to cursing him out, but the way that you can feel the hardened front of his slacks chase after your ass for friction whenever you move away even the slightest has you confident that it will not be long until he is cracking
until he begs for you
letting out a shaky exhale, you hang the stocking still in your grip next to mingi’s one; a dark, navy blue that used to be a fluffy towel, now repurposed for christmas
hongjoong passes you the last stocking but you let it drop to the ground
“oops,” you drawl coquettishly
you bend over to pick up jongho’s stocking, slowly and deliberately brushing up against hongjoong’s cock with the curve of your ass
you smirk when the friction draws out a guttural groan from his chest
a hand comes to rest just below your waist, “you’re playing with fire right now, kitten”
“looks like we need a little…water to put it out, then,” you press back against him once more
he snaps
it’s not long before the tip of his swollen cock is pressing against your entrance, his slacks still bunched around his thighs in his hurry to fuck you
he pulls out the vibrator and he shushes your whines at the feeling of emptiness by thrusting three fingers right into you
“fuck, kitten,” he mouths the side of your neck, “you’re already stretched out and ready for my cock”
your mind goes fuzzy at his words and hongjoong smirks in satisfaction
sliding his fingers from out of you, he lines the tip of his cock between your legs-
you both freeze when a loud clang resonates throughout the warehouse, like someone has hit the outer steel walls
hard.
“kim hongjoong!” an unfamiliar voice yells with fury from outside
another clang, this time closer towards the entrance
there’s not much holding the warehouse doors closed; you two weren’t exactly expecting hostile visitors
“you think we can get a round in before they make it through the doors?” hongjoong asks
“if you can cum in the next ten seconds, sure”
a colourful string of curses leaves his mouth before he pulls out of you and fixes his slacks - with difficulty, you must say - while you adjust your own clothes
just in time for the warehouse doors to fling open
“you killed my fucking brother, you motherfucking bastard!”
“who are you again?” hongjoong leans back to rest against the edge of the table while he watches you pick up jongho’s long-forgotten stocking on the floor. “you’ll have to remind me.”
numerous men stride in towards the far end of the warehouse where you two are - were - hanging up the stockings
you look away with disinterest; it’s nothing you and hongjoong can’t take care of
“kyungseok,” the man grits out, jaw clenching with irritation when neither of you show any signs of recognition. “you killed my brother, kyungtae. leader of the bluebirds.”
at his last word, it finally clicks
“ah,” hongjoong cracks his knuckles and stretches his neck lazily, “the one who thought they could touch my kitten and get away with it”
meanwhile, you step back after hanging the last stocking on the wall, admiring the row of decorations
you direct your question at the man behind you, “what do you think, kyungtaek?”
“it’s kyungseok,” he snarls
you wave dismissively, pressing a kiss against hongjoong’s jaw as you praise, “these look wonderful, babe”
you hear kyungseok yell out at his lackeys followed by a flurry of movement
hongjoong sighs, sneaks a kiss in, and then gently steps the both of you to the side out of the path of an incoming kick
“if we make this quick, maybe i can finish fucking you before seonghwa and the others get here,” he winks
then you two move
in quick succession, you use the momentum of their thrown punches to yank two men over your shoulder, one after the other
the wind is knocked out of them and you aim a sharp blow to their necks to render them unconscious
realising that close combat may not be the best idea, another bluebird member brandishes a knife to gain the upper hand
“weapons? that’s not very fair,” you purr
you lunge forward before you have even finished your sentence, catching him off guard and grabbing hold of his arm
twisting his wrist backwards, he shouts in pain as his grip on the knife loosens and it clatters to the floor
“oh dear,” you mock, your hands twisting up to curl around his throat
vaguely, you register hongjoong yell out your name
“duck!”
you barely have time to crouch, your hand yanking down the man with you from where your fingers are still wrapped around his throat, before a burly male is tossed right over your body and sent careening into the table nearby
you watch in dismay as cookies scatter onto the floor, wood splintering with a loud crack
“fuck you, hongjoong, i spent ages arranging them onto the plates”
he has the audacity to smirk in apology while he wraps his arms around the neck of another man and twists, forearms flexing as the bone gives way with a sickening snap, “sorry, kitten”
the man whose throat you have been squeezing is now limp and he sags to the floor
he’s too heavy for you to throw at hongjoong, so you settle for picking up the knife you disarmed and fling it at your boyfriend
“duck,” you tease
hongjoong rolls his eyes and drops his body towards the ground, your knife hurtling past the empty space where his forehead was just milliseconds ago, before it hits its mark and makes itself home in the chest of a man who has been sneaking up from behind
moving in tandem, hongjoong extends his leg and sweeps it along the ground to knock the thug off his feet
the man’s arms fling backwards as his weight crashes towards the ground, colliding into the christmas tree you had decorated earlier and taking it down with him
you pinch the bridge of your nose as the ornaments shatter
“oops?” hongjoong shrugs his shoulders noncommittally
stepping over the lifeless bodies scattered by your feet, you move away a little to pull out your phone
most of the bluebird gang has already been taken out; hongjoong can handle the rest himself
“hey, seonghwa and i are nearly there,” yunho’s voice sounds over the receiver
“oh,” you hum contemplatively, “is anyone else still on their way?”
“probably wooyoung. you know him, he’s always late,” he chuckles into the phone, “why?”
“can you see if he can buy some new ornaments? and pick up some fresh cookies while he’s at it”
there’s a yell and a loud thud as a body rolls to a stop just a few feet away from you
“what was that?” yunho startles
hongjoong has picked up the fallen christmas tree and is currently swinging it around like a crazed batter
“just hongjoong having some fun”
when you hang up, you are just in time to hear the loud thwunk as the tree connects with kyungseok’s temple
you’re not sure whether the splinter you hear is a result of the trunk or his skull cracking
the last bluebird member drops down dead, blood pooling out from under him
hongjoong scoffs, “merry fucking christmas”
and for good measure, hongjoong shoves an intact bauble into the man’s mouth
it’s finally silent
“now,” he turns to you, “where were we before we were…interrupted”
at hongjoong’s predatory gaze, you feel the arousal from before washing over you
he approaches you leisurely as he uncuffs his sleeves to roll them up, loosening the top buttons of his shirt, all the while undressing you with his lustful eyes
you drink up his appearance, eyes raking over his exposed chest that shines with a sheen layer of sweat
he’s in front of you now
“looks like i’ll have to prepare you again, kitten”
his fingers start to slip under the waistband of your panties when-
“heard you fucktards knocked over the cookies!”
his voice echoes throughout the warehouse before he even steps foot into the warehouse
wooyoung is fucking early.
you’re quite positive hongjoong is about to deck him through the roof
“wow,” wooyoung lets out a low whistle as he walks in to survey the scene, eyes scanning wildly over the splattered blood and mutilated bodies across the floor with an expression that appears mostly impressed
hongjoong’s clenched fists are white
uncaring of his leader’s lack of response, wooyoung continues, “when you told us the dress code was red, i didn’t think you meant this kind of red”
he approaches you two to squat down beside kyungseok’s body and taps the bauble in his mouth with interest, “rad decorations”
you watch in amusement as hongjoong’s last string snaps
“wooyoung,” he says evenly
it goes in one ear and out the other
wooyoung looks around as he asks, “can i tie him up with tinsel before the others get here?”
“jung wooyoung”
said man finally blanches
good thing too
because you don’t think hongjoong is joking when he says,
“if you don’t get the fuck out right now, you are going to become part of the decorations.”
seonghwa
“remember, as soon as i leave-”
“i need to lock the door,” you finish seonghwa’s sentence cheekily
he chuckles as he shakes his head fondly, “and if you feel like anything is off-”
“call you or hongjoong straight away,” you mimic, emphasising the last two words with the same seriousness he nags you with all the time
despite your words, your heart flutters shyly at seonghwa’s neverending protectiveness and worry for you
with his line of work, it isn’t easy for him to leave your side, much less leave you alone in the apartment
he understands though
it’s only been a few months since he found you; barely a shell of the curious, energetic and endearing person that you are now
under his careful nurturing, you have flourished and learnt to love and trust again
it doesn’t mean that you are quite ready to leave the apartment just yet for something other than a quick grocery run or walk in the park with seonghwa at your side
but it’s okay - baby steps
“i’ll be back at 6 and then we can cook dinner together,” he kisses your temple sweetly, “see you later, love”
you watch as he lingers outside the door, feet always ever so reluctant to leave
he motions for you to close the door and you know he won’t leave until he sees that you have closed and locked it
so with a final wave, you shut the door, turn the lock and then press your ear right up against the wood
he thinks you don’t know that he does it, and you won’t admit to it in fear that he will stop out of embarrassment
but you hear him whisper love you before his footsteps recede down the corridor
you have most of the day to yourself until seonghwa comes back
he had said that hongjoong was giving the gang christmas night off, a pleasant and welcome change from all the nights you fight the sleep tugging at your eyelids as you wait curled up on the sofa for seonghwa to come home
you occupy your day with little odd jobs here and there around the house, like washing the dishes and doing the laundry and cleaning the bedroom
he always tells you off because he wants to be the one doing them for you, but the small exasperated smile that he gives you every time barely conceals his underlying fondness
and then when you have exhausted the chores, you pull out a pencil and some paper and start drawing out ideas for a gingerbread house
because seonghwa had promised to make one with you later tonight once he discovered you had never tried it before
you cannot contain your excitement as the clock finally ticks to six
your little sketches lay abandoned across the coffee table as you start to pace the living room skittishly, ears perking up whenever you hear noise outside
half an hour passes just like that but there’s still no sign of seonghwa
that’s okay, you tell yourself
you understand that he doesn’t have a normal office job where he can just clock out and walk away as he wishes
sending him a quick text asking if he is on his way home, you busy yourself with lining up all the utensils on the kitchen counter perfectly parallel, just the way he likes it
the chopsticks
the spatula
the knife
the cooking board
again.
the chopsticks
the spatula
the knife
the cooking board
you glance up at the clock
it’s seven
you tap on your phone to bring the screen to life
no notifications
you try to quell the growing panic inside of you
but you cannot ignore the fact that seonghwa would usually send you a quick message when he is held up by something, especially on a day where he has clearly told you when to expect him home
what if something went wrong?
what if he is hurt?
what if he is missing?
what if he is…dying?
you take a shuddering breath as you pick up your phone again with shaking fingers
7:24 PM
the glare of your screen seems too bright all of a sudden
you press on the first contact of your speed dial, seonghwa’s name popping up, decorated with a little heart that he added himself when he first entered his number into your new phone
the call rings and rings and rings
“the person you have called is not available, please leave a short message after the tone-”
your chest heaves to force oxygen into your lungs
you haven’t had a real reason to contact him yet, not with seonghwa personally keeping you in the loop
but you don’t hesitate to press the second contact on your speed dial
hongjoong greets you with a little surprise, obviously not having expected a call from you, “hey, is everything alright?”
you fight to keep the panic out of your voice as you ask him, “is hwa still there?”
there’s some rustling in the background
“hwa? no, he left almost two hours ago”
your stomach lurches dangerously
you don’t realise you’ve let out a soft whimper until hongjoong is repeating your name over and over again into the phone
“take a breath for me,” he soothes, “what’s wrong?”
“he said he’d be back by six,” your eyes start to well with the tears you’ve been suppressing. “he’s still not home”
hongjoong curses, calling out for the others still at base
then his voice filters through the speakers again, “we’re going to look into this, okay? everything’s going to be fine. you’ve done a good job letting me know”
with reassurances and words of comfort, a promise to call you back in a couple of minutes, hongjoong hangs up the call
yeosang and jongho sidle up to hongjoong on high alert, having heard the end of the conversation
“seonghwa’s missing,” hongjoong grits out, already trying to track down the other’s phone location
san appears in the doorway to the room looking grim
he holds up seonghwa’s phone in his hand, “he forgot to take it with him”
hongjoong curses lowly, “park fucking seonghwa. i swear if he isn’t already dead by now, he will be when i find him”
he tells yunho to hold down the fort at base while he, yeosang and wooyoung trace the route to the apartment you now share with seonghwa
you are unsure how long it will be until hongjoong calls you again
what you do know is that you’re not going to sit around idly while seonghwa could very well be in danger
your mind flashes back to all those times you both stand in the expanse of his living room, coffee table pushed to one side, as he gives you what he coins the ultimate self-hwafense class
he demonstrates and talks you through both defensive and offensive stances and how you can use your size and agility to your advantage
sometimes, he hates that he has to even teach you how to protect yourself
because if it were up to him, he would be your protector forever
but seonghwa knows the dangers of being involved with the mafia and so instead, he gently adjusts your movements, gives you praises when you grasp the concept, and demands kisses when you successfully pin him down
and more often than not, his self-hwafense classes end up in giggles and laughter because there is nothing less intimidating than his sparkling doe-eyes and wide grin as he pretends to act the part of a threatening intruder
just as your fingers brush over the cold steel of the gun hidden underneath the table, your blood runs cold when you hear your doorknob jiggling
it’s not purposeful - it is hesitant, intermittent and careful
exactly how an intruder would open a door
you know you do not have a choice
you have to protect yourself
slinking slowly towards the door and positioning yourself so that the intruder will walk in with their back to you, you grasp the gun in your hand a little tighter with bated breath
the lock clicks open and you watch the knob turning to nudge the door open
your mind screams at you to run and hide as you fight every cell in your body to keep your feet rooted where they are
amongst the fogginess of fear clouding your brain, you have enough sense to wait for the perfect opportunity
…now.
with as much strength as your shaking hands can muster, you slam the butt of your gun against the intruder’s head
hongjoong’s phone vibrates in his hand and he answers the call within the first ring
but before he can even get so much as a word out, he hears your trembling whisper
“hongjoong, he- he’s here”
“shit,” hongjoong says at the same time wooyoung steps harder on the accelerator, “who? are you okay? are you safe?”
“oh no,” your voice becomes harder to hear as the phone slips further away from you, “he’s awake”
“we’re close, hang in there- fuck” hongjoong punches the side of the car door when your call cuts off
wooyoung doesn’t need to be told - he floors the car
the tyres squeal as they pull up to the street of the apartment, wooyoung having just barely turned off the ignition before the three of them are dashing in and bypassing the lift for the stairs
as they reach the door of your apartment, they see that it is nudged open
a sign that cues the three of them to immediately slip out their guns
with hongjoong at the front, they barge in and point their guns at the figures in the living room
“move and i’ll blow your fucking brains out,” he commands
“hongjoong?”
said man falters
that’s not your voice
“the fuck?”
of all things he was prepared for, this was not one of them
because seonghwa is in the living room
sitting on a chair nursing a very bruised head with a sorry bag of frozen peas pressed to it
but it is very much seonghwa, alive and kicking
something on hongjoong’s face must show how much he wants to skin the man and feed him to the sharks because seonghwa grimaces and makes a very poor attempt to break the tension
“surprise?”
wooyoung loses it and keels in on himself with laughter
seonghwa gestures weakly with the hand that is not holding the bag of peas at the inconspicuous paper bag sitting on the kitchen counter, which is looking slightly sad and saggy after he quite literally crumpled on top of it, “i bought donuts?”
when hongjoong exhales the longest sigh known to mankind, pinching the bridge of his nose, you completely understand how he feels
“they’re shaped like reindeers and elves…they’re limited edition…” seonghwa’s voice trails off and you see him visibly wilt like a sunflower in a cave
because as much as he knows and is sorry for making you and the gang worry, he had rushed to line up at that donut shop you have recently fallen in love with because he thought surprising you with the cute christmas donuts would make you smile
well, surprise you he did
it’s not everyday you knock out an intruder, only to find out that it’s actually your boyfriend
“i’m sure they are very cute, hwa,” you tenderly replace his hand on the makeshift ice pack so that he can rest his arm, “thank you”
and you really do mean it
seonghwa perks up at your words and snakes his arm around your waist, tugging you closer until you are basically sitting on his sturdy thigh
he looks haughtily at the other three men, “at least somebody appreciates them”
and then he lets out a yelp as his hands scramble to catch his forgotten phone that hongjoong has tossed at him
“i’ll let you off the hook this time, park seonghwa, but only because it’s christmas and i have better things to be doing. we all do,” the leader makes a move with yeosang and wooyoung to leave
but he seems to think better of it because hongjoong whips around to make one last biting remark
“they better be some fucking good donuts, the best fucking donuts you’ll ever eat”
you and seonghwa dissolve into giggles once the door slams shut behind the trio
“how’s your head feeling now?” you take the bag of peas off and gingerly touch the red bump
“much better,” his eyes twinkle, “all it needs now is your kiss”
you blatantly turn your nose into the air and stand up to grab the bag of donuts, “no kisses. that’s for scaring me”
he grumbles indignantly under his breath like a five year old; nose scrunched up, lip jutted out
you laugh, presenting the bag to him and watching as his demeanor immediately brightens
“well, let’s find out if these are the best fucking donuts we’ll ever eat”
seonghwa opens the bag excitedly, having made it very clear that he wanted to do the honours and present them to you
but then he freezes, mouth opening to form an ‘o’
and then his shoulders sag once more
seonghwa wails
and it all makes sense when you peer into the bag
“the donuts are all squished!”
yunho
“J, can you take a look at my sniper? i think something’s wrong with the scope”
you dog-ear the page of the file you’re scanning through to look up at yunho
“i’m pretty sure i know the least about scopes out of everybod-”
“cause i can’t seem to take my sight off you,” he waggles his eyebrows at you with an overly-smouldering gaze as he leans oh so casually against the doorframe
you swallow the insult that is about to leave your mouth, instead, undoing the dog ear and dutifully continuing from where you left off
unfazed, yunho steps closer towards your table with an excited bounce, “want to see my gun? i’ve got a pretty big one”
you hum, “i’ve seen it plenty times, nothing new”
his eyes crinkle at having received a reaction, which spurs him on further
yunho leans down a little into your space so that you are forced to look up at him, “then can i put my gun in your holster?”
you finally laugh at the crudeness of his words and you hate that he looks utterly pleased with himself
(you don’t really hate it, but you know that he loves flustering you)
(you can pretend if it’s for him)
“remind me again why you’re my boyfriend?”
“cause i shoot my load into you,” he flirts, complete with a wink, finger guns and then a flying kiss that you pretend to snatch out of the air and slam against the ground
immediately, he looks like a puppy whose tail you have just stepped on, so you reach out for his hand and tug him closer with another laugh, turning your body so that you can bury your face into his stomach and wrap your arms around his waist
one of his arms naturally slides over your shoulders to encase you, his other hand running through your hair the way he knows you like it
“what do you want, you big puppy,” your voice comes out muffled
yunho may have claimed you as the J to his PB, but you think he is better nicknamed BP than peanut butter
BP as in Big Puppy
“i miss you,” he admits
you pull away and shake your head, “you see me every day, yunho. we work together”
“yeah, and i’m sick of work cockblocking us,” he says with finality
yunho swipes your files to the side in one smooth motion, clearing the table as he easily lifts you by the waist to perch you on the edge
you barely have time to complain about the files until he is pressing his lips against yours
“i miss you,” he repeats when you break apart to take a breath, “and it’s christmas. relax”
“you talk too much,” you say, grabbing his tie and pulling him in for another kiss
his large hands settle on your waist, just below the hem of your shirt
your back arches from sensitivity when the fingers of his right hand slip under your shirt and slowly trail upwards towards your chest
his other hand snakes behind you to splay across the pretty arch of your back
you loop your arms around his neck, tangling your fingers in his hair for purchase
a stuttered moan escapes your lips when he shifts and his thigh brushes against your core
“you like that?” yunho grinds his thigh against you once more, eyes dark as he watches your face contort with pleasure. “bet you’d like to ride my thigh until you cum”
you’re about to hook your legs around his waist when there’s a yell from the doorway
yunho immediately retracts his hands and you rush to tidy the appearance of your top, both of your heads snapping towards the door
wooyoung is there, body already turning back the way he came from with a hand blocking his own view, “can you guys get a room or close the door at least?”
“or you can stop walking in on us,” yunho suggests with a red face
but the younger is already out of earshot, too busy prancing through the rest of the base announcing, “PB&J are fucking in the office again, nobody disturb them!”
yunho rubs the tips of his flushed ears and you pepper one final kiss along his jawline before you bend down to pick up the scattered files from the floor
“don’t tell me you’re going to read your stupid files again,” he groans
“well, reading these stupid files happen to be direct orders from hongjoong,” you retort
“then good thing i’ve already asked him for permission to take you out today”
he snatches the file from your hand and tosses it haphazardly onto the table, quirking an eyebrow teasingly
“what do you mean?”
yunho grabs your hand, leading you towards the door as he tells you excitedly, “let’s go on a date”
and that’s how you find yourself wrapped up in yunho’s coat over the thin sweater you slipped on because nobody told you that you’d be fucking freezing your ass off on the open rooftop of a building on christmas night
it had taken all but three seconds of stepping out onto the rooftop for a shiver to descend through your body from head to toe
“this is a date?” you had groused
yunho had then immediately taken off his coat to wrap around your shoulders as he made a pleased noise of affirmation
“then do tell me why you took your sniper along,” you sniffle a little, compliantly allowing yunho to button you up. “you want me to tell you how sexy you look while you shoot someone through the head?”
yunho grins down at you
“you think i’m sexy when i snipe people?”
you roll your eyes at his selective hearing
(you think he’s always sexy)
at your playful shove, he reaches into his pockets to pull out a pair of earplugs for you
“put them in,” he tells you before you can even ask what they’re for
when you make no move to do so, he gingerly tucks your hair out of the way so that he can put the plugs into your ears
watch me, he gestures with his hands
and then he is perching along the edge of the rooftop, setting up his sniper in front of him and adjusting the scope as he looks down the sight into the far distance
you watch as he applies pressure to the back of the rifle with his broad shoulder, as his slender fingers curl around the trigger, as he closes one eye and exhales a slow breath
then he shoots
you think that he is going to get up and finally tell you what he is doing, except he pulls the bolt back to chamber a new bullet and adjusts the angle of his rifle
and then he shoots again
you catch yourself staring at the veins running across the back of his hand and the way his finger flexes around the trigger
because you know all too well how it feels for his finger to flex in…other places
you lose count of how many times yunho pulls the trigger - at one point, he even reloads a magazine
he has almost finished the second round of bullets before he finally appears to be satisfied, scrambling up and dusting off his knees
with an eager tug once you have taken out your earplugs, he brings you to his sniper that he has left in its place on the floor
“look through the scope!”
you are careful to ease yourself down into a mimic of yunho’s earlier pose, knowing that even the slightest of nudges can displace the target by miles
hovering behind you, he shifts from foot to foot, waiting for you to see it
and when you do, your eyes nearly fall out in surprise
“yunho!” you exclaim, unable to fathom what you are seeing
because yunho has shot a fucking heart shape made out of bullet holes into the side of an abandoned building
“is this meant to be romantic?!”
contrary to your tone, you don’t think you have ever found your deadly 6’1” sniper boyfriend to be more endearing than now
he preens with the widest smile on his face, “yeah!”
you stand up with a matching smile of your own and step closer to pull him into a hug
“i don’t think i’ll be forgetting about this christmas for a while”
“you better not forget about it ever,” he threatens with a harmless tickle to your side
“thank you,” you tell him sincerely, “i love you”
he peppers your face with kisses, “i love you too”
distantly, you hear the sound of sirens, no doubt the sound of gunshots having been reported
“i guess that’s our cue,” he grins, stepping away from you and slinging the sniper over his shoulder
“our cue to do what?” you allow him to lace his fingers through yours
“our cue to fucking leg it”
and so with his hand warmly encasing yours, laughter bubbling out of your chests and cheeks flushing as the first flakes of snow start to fall, you both make a run for it
yeosang
“get some napkins, snacks, cooking oil and maybe a couple of drinks if you can carry it all”
you listen while seonghwa lists off the things you need to get from the shops for the christmas party
it’s nothing huge - just a get together between you, your older brother, hongjoong, and the rest of the ateez gang
yeosang sidles up to you to ask, “ready to go?”
as you smile with a nod and lean into him, hongjoong narrows his eyes from where he’s sitting on a chair
it seems like the two of you have gotten quite…close recently
not that you two weren’t already close before
and granted, hongjoong was the one who raised hell to ensure yeosang followed you everywhere as your bodyguard
except you and yeosang are getting a little too chummy for his liking
but then you’re giving seonghwa a quick goodbye peck on the cheek and you are turning around to look at your brother with that damned smile of yours to ask if he is coming along too, and hongjoong thinks that he’s just looking into things a bit too much
“yeah,” hongjoong gets up from his seat, “let’s go”
once your little trio makes it to the mart, you decide to divide and conquer the items on seonghwa’s shopping list
you’ve just grabbed a packet of napkins when someone suddenly tugs you down one of the aisles
the squeal of surprise that comes out of you quickly turns into an exasperated laugh seeing that it’s just yeosang
he’s looking at you with his sparkling eyes and expectant smile
“you’re hopeless,” you tell him because you know exactly what he wants
“hopelessly in love,” he corrects you, still waiting with an eager expression
you hiss his name and frantically look around to make sure your brother isn’t around before you relent and press a chaste kiss against the corner of his lips
yeosang immediately blushes and tries to hide the smile on his face like he didn’t literally just kidnap you into a shopping aisle demanding for kisses
you always find his bashfulness endearing though, so you rest your hands on his shoulders to balance on your tiptoes and quickly pepper several more kisses over the apples of his cheeks, the tip of his nose and the sharp of his jawline
“i don’t think santa needs rudolph this year,” you tap his nose affectionately, “you’re much brighter”
as you watch yeosang grow even redder at your statement, you wonder how this is the same man who will move heaven and earth to protect you
“y/n? yeosang?”
hongjoong’s voice is frighteningly close and you’re pretty sure he is just in the next aisle over
grabbing the first thing that you see, you clutch the item and the napkins to your chest and walk out to meet your brother
“there you two are,” hongjoong frowns, “what took you two so long?”
you reach out and touch his elbow in apology, “sorry, joong. i needed help finding the plastic plates”
except hongjoong doesn’t think you two are very sorry at all, because not only did he pay, but the backpack stuffed full with the shopping bags is now on his back
“why am i carrying the backpack,” he complains, looking at you and yeosang already mounted on the latter’s motorbike
yeosang smiles innocently and jerks his head back in your direction, “i’ve already got a cute little backpack”
“well that cute little backpack also happens to be my sister so shouldn’t she sit behind me- hey!”
you press yourself closer against yeosang’s back, both of you breaking out into laughter as he revs his bike and leaves hongjoong behind in the dust
your brother flips the bird at your backs, grumbling colourfully under his breath as he twists the throttle on his own motorbike to catch up to you two
and for someone who prides himself in being an observant mafia boss, it takes hongjoong many, many days to belatedly realise that plastic plates were never even part of the shopping list
yeosang gently takes your helmet from out of your grasp and tames an unruly strand of your hair that has become ruffled as you two walk back inside, bypassing seonghwa hanging a wreath on the front door
the eldest watches you two for a moment, seemingly in thought, before he picks up something else to hang up
that’s how, when hongjoong arrives a few minutes later with the shopping, he runs into seonghwa fixing mistletoe to the doorframe of the kitchen
“mistletoe?” hongjoong questions as he places the bags onto the countertop, “the fuck for?”
seonghwa shrugs vaguely, “the couples”
“the only couple i see is the couple of losers over there”
hongjoong stares pointedly into the living room, where san is starting to wriggle under the weight of the ornaments balancing on the top of his head and shoulders and hanging off his ears and fingers, courtesy of wooyoung who is currently yelling out stay still!
except the ornaments all come tumbling off in a flurry of movement when yunho thunders past them, mingi in tow
“snowball fight!!”’
it’s not snowing heavily but there’s a layer of snow thick enough for all nine of you to stumble outside in glee
and as it turns out, yeosang is very serious about his job as your bodyguard
even during snowball fights
jongho and yunho have formed some sort of alliance, so by an unspoken agreement, pretty much everyone else has teamed up in hopes of defeating the formidable pair
(no one’s entirely sure which side mingi is playing for, but he’s having fun scooping handfuls of snow and dumping them onto people, which is all that matters)
hongjoong is busy fending off wooyoung’s snowballs - another person who has broken the unofficial alliance - so yeosang stays close to you
he alternates between adding fresh ammo to your snowball pile and blocking any snowballs that are thrown around
it doesn’t matter if they’re thrown in your direction or not; if yeosang sees a snowball, then he is ready to keep it far, far away from you
somehow, amidst all the chaos, yunho manages to unearth a whole slab of snow that is still intact
he cackles evilly as he lifts it above his head and hurls it somewhere into the centre of the whole group
now, the deadly snow slab is nowhere even close to landing on you
but again, yeosang takes his job as your bodyguard - and boyfriend - very, very seriously
he makes a dive in your direction to take the hit and the angels up in heaven blow their trumpets in celebration when he knocks you over instead and you two fall into the snow together
he lands on top of you, arms bracing himself as he encases your frame underneath him
you’re a little winded - the breath has been knocked out of you, you want to laugh at the absurdity of the situation, and also yeosang looks extremely stunning
you can see every single snowflake that has fluttered down and clung onto his long lashes and soft hair, and it certainly doesn’t help that he’s looking at you with the most tender eyes
“merry christmas,” he murmurs with a smile, “i love you”
the sounds of snowballs breaking and consequent screeches mute themselves into the background, the crystal petals falling from the sky blurring in slow motion as yeosang dips down to capture your lips in a gentle kiss
one of his hands cradles your face gingerly as you sigh into the kiss, almost as if he is afraid you will melt and seep into the snow
jongho is about to take the opportunity to pelt yeosang’s exposed back with snowballs, but pauses his deadly pitch when he sees that the older is actually a little…preoccupied right now
he realises very quickly that not only have you two caught his attention, but you’ve also managed to grab hongjoong’s attention
said man squints his eyes at who he thinks is yeosang and…you?
you’re both awfully close together in a heap on the ground and hold the fuck up are you two kissing?
right before hongjoong can rub his eyes and take a closer look, a snowball is smashed to smithereens against his face
hacking snow out of his mouth, he searches furiously for the culprit, eyes landing on jongho who is staring right back at him with his hand still pitched forward from throwing the snowball
why jongho looks flustered, hongjoong has no idea
but it’s not like hongjoong can take on the younger anyway so he chooses to ignore the snowball and looks back in your direction
…where you and yeosang are both lying on your backs making snow angels
hongjoong frowns, rationalising that the kiss had just been a glitch in his imagination
because surely he would’ve noticed ages ago if you and yeosang were indeed dating
seeing as the leader shrugs it off and drops to the ground to shovel an enormous snowball with renewed vigour, jongho lets out a sigh of relief
that is
until wooyoung very helpfully points out, “why are yeosang’s lips all glossy”
you and yeosang freeze mid-snow angel
like zombies in a horror film, you and yeosang slowly sit up with unease creeping through your bodies as you both look towards your brother
his back is turned, body eerily still
most of the other members have also frozen, snowballs still clutched in their hands as their knowing pupils waver
then mingi also helpfully tacks on, “it looks like he kissed y/n or something”
at his words, hongjoong’s arms start to move again
he does not turn around yet, simply hums and says, “interesting”
yeosang nudges you with an elbow and theatrically whispers, “if we leg it right now, do you think it will notice”
it starts to stand up from its crouching position
“...i think it will, yeo”
hongjoong finally turns around and you can see that, similar to yunho not too long ago, he is carrying a huge slab of intact snow in his hands
what’s different is that hongjoong is most definitely not smiling
you have a feeling that he is going to be putting a new definition to snowball fight
hongjoong approaches with his snow weapon
“snowballs?” he shakes his head mockingly with a frighteningly blank expression
“after today,” his gaze drops down pointedly towards yeosang’s nether region, “no balls”
san
you don’t need to rely on your past experience working in an underground casino for you to know what the odds of your current gamble are
you are a mouse walking into the lion’s den
the last time you were with crescent - the mafia gang you had been brought into and was supposedly your family for almost a decade - you were wrongfully accused as being a traitor and had nearly lost your life
now here you are, walking back into crescent’s base with your own two feet just a mere few weeks later
and yet, you are not afraid
your former gang does not know, but tonight, you are the dealer of this poker game
minsu, crescent’s mob boss, leers at the sight of you entering the small building
they do not have many affiliates, having kept their numbers small over the years, but most of them have gathered together for drinks tonight
you already knew this, though
you have chosen to confront them on christmas for a reason
“ahh, merry christmas, darling,” minsu drawls saccharinely, “has santa answered my wishes for a personal slut?”
his words do not register in your ears when your eyes involuntarily flit over to the back of the room
there’s a face sitting in the corner that haunts you
the day you were labelled a traitor, you had been accompanying your capo to make a trade deal with a relatively new gang
the boss of the gang who is currently sitting in the same room as the rest of crescent, comfortable smirk on his face like he wants to show you that he is where he belongs
you realise now that it was a set-up all along
there was no deal to be made and there was no emerging gang
it was - is - crescent against you
looking back at minsu now, you address him, “why did you betray me”
he pretends to look appalled, one hand perched daintily against his chest as his jaw drops
“we saw the way you were getting closer to choi san of ateez,” he spits out san’s name, “and after you betrayed crescent during the trade, you ran pathetically to his doorstep like a damsel in distress, which only proved our suspicions”
he states it so believably, as if your loyalty wavered and led to your own inevitable downfall
it’s all bullshit though
you and san have never interacted outside of the negotiations your gangs made with each other
without anywhere to go after crescent had backstabbed you, only then had you sought san’s help
“so what are you doing back here, darling?” minsu stands up
he stalks closer towards you with fake pity plastered across his face, “to beg for forgiveness? to beg for us to spare your little boyfriend’s life?”
the flicker of fury inside of you is quickly growing into an inferno at minsu’s mocking tone
but before it starts to consume you, a new voice enters the fray
“i don’t think we’ll be the ones begging by the end of the night”
a figure steps in and you hear the sound of metal buckles scraping against the ground as a limp, bloodied body is also dragged along
the person comes to a stop beside you before they toss the body in their grasp carelessly to one side
the familiar lilt of their teasing reaches you
“hey, sweetheart”
the inferno inside you smothers itself out at their words
“choi san,” minsu snarls, hackles now raised at the unforeseen addition of his presence
the rest of crescent also seem to become restless, shifting on the edge of their seats or making a move to stand up
because they’re not foolish
they know san’s reputation for ruthlessness, particularly when someone has wronged him
and by extension-
more footsteps resound behind you
-the rest of ateez
you may be a mouse walking into the lion’s den
but when you have poachers behind your back, it becomes your den
minsu’s face finally drains of all blood when he realises the deep shit he has landed himself in
and so do several others, it seems
you wince slightly in embarrassment when a handful of his men scramble up from their seats and push past the ateez members surrounding you to run out of the building
for a moment, no one dares to breathe as they watch you and ateez with trepidation
san simply raises a brow as his eyes narrow with disinterest
the sounds of the cowards’ feet striking the pavement once they make it out onto the street are suddenly replaced by the crack of gunshots and the distinct thump of flesh falling to the ground
from somewhere up high, yunho chambers another bullet as he stares down the scope of his sniper with impassivity
“anyone else want to give that a try?” san taunts
no one answers
hongjoong finally emerges from the flanks and almost immediately, the already-frigid atmosphere drops another several degrees
“a gang of members who have no qualms betraying their own will only end up destroying themselves eventually,” he calmly approaches minsu, who shuffles backwards in response
hongjoong continues, “as much as crescent isn’t worth my time, i don’t really feel like waiting for that day to come”
before anyone can react, he swipes a glass bottle from one of the tables and swings it across minsu’s head
the latter stumbles backwards in shock with a hand flying up to stem the blood flow coming from his temple
ateez do not need a further command
all at once, the members jump forward bloodthirsty for vengeance, save for san, who grabs a chair that mingi has quite literally tossed a person off and brings it over for you to sit on
he winks as he quips, “we’ll probably be on santa’s naughty list this year, but maybe if you just watch you’ll get away with it, sweetheart”
san knows you can hold your own in a fight, but he also knows that your ribs are still sore and bruised
so he waits until you sit with a laugh before he turns around to face the others
he doesn’t really care about most of the crescent lackeys
he knows hongjoong and the rest of ateez will wipe them out fine
who he really cares about is that bastard who pretended to lead the fake gang
and that motherfucker minsu
san is going to make them regret hurting you
san is going to make them wish they were never born
he advances towards them with deceptive calmness
minsu is slumped against a table, still licking at his wounds pathetically
he’s only alive because none of the members have bothered with him
san leaves him for the time being and takes out a dagger as he advances upon the nameless member who had duped you
easily evading the man’s frantic punch, san responds by slamming the hilt of his dagger against the other’s temple
the man goes crashing down and minsu tries to scramble away from them in fear
“i would cut your tongue off, since you spew so many fucking lies,” san grips the man’s jaw hard enough that his fingers turn white, “but i don’t want to touch your filthy mouth”
instead, san drags the dagger across the gang member’s throat
blood rapidly gurgles out of the wound as the man’s fingers make futile attempts to grasp san’s hands, but very quickly, he attempts to stem the blood flow instead
but a fence can only hold a dam back for so long
san shoves him aside and lunges for minsu
“your turn,” san smirks
whipping out his pistol, san flicks the safety off and shoots minsu’s hand as the latter lets out a primal shriek of pain
san shoots again, this time at his other hand, once more, through his calf, once more, through his stomach
minsu swears to the high heavens in between wails and howls, begging for san to stop
“what did i say,” san places a foot on his stomach wound and pushes down, “it wouldn’t be me or my sweetheart begging tonight”
minsu’s animalistic cries are silenced with a final gunshot
san exhales and makes his way back to where you are still seated to reassure, “you’ll never have to worry about crescent ever again”
“thank you, san,” you sink into his embrace
you’ll thank the rest of ateez later, but for now, you focus on the man in front of you
“i said that i would protect you, didn’t i, sweetheart?”
he gathers your face in his hands and thumbs the round of your cheeks sweetly
you nod in his grasp, blinking up at him through your eyelashes
“i want to kiss you,” san suddenly confesses, “can i kiss you?”
a teasing smile tugs at your lips, “it’s christmas. shouldn’t you kiss me under a mistletoe?”
san looks up to check, as if he really thinks that a mafia gang’s base would have mistletoe hanging from the ceiling
when he confirms that indeed there is not, his eyes wander around the room for a substitute until something appears to pique his interest
you watch as he unsheathes another dagger from his belt and points it in the direction of minsu’s body
“i can cut his foot off,” san tells you with determination, “then we’d have a minsu-toe”
amidst the last of the fighting amongst the room, someone overhears and chortles at san’s words
“i can’t believe you,” you let out your own laugh
“so…” san beams, “is that a yes?”
“fuck the mistletoe,” you laugh as you pull him forward, “just kiss me already”
and kiss you he does
mingi
for the first time ever, you think you hate the snow
even if it’s christmas eve today and it’s the first snowfall of the year
you had been prepared for a peak in business at your little bar, the mist, but with the sudden onset of heavy snowfall and a rapid drop in temperature, you’ve barely had any customers
admittedly, you are used to slow business considering there is a much larger bar, the chilli peppers, just across the street
but not even your few, regular customers have shown up today nor for the past few weeks
you’ve scanned the outside of your bar several times already, each time unfruitful as you are met with an empty street save for the falling snow and soft glow of the streetlamps
sighing, you decide to look out once more before making yourself a mixed drink when you spot a figure walking up to your doors
your breath hitches when you recognise who it is
it’s him
the handsome stranger who, you suppose, is not really a stranger anymore
it has been almost two months since he first took refuge in your bar while being chased by another gang
his visits since have been rare and infrequent, but they will always span late into the early hours of dawn when he does
“hey,” mingi softly greets you as he steps into your bar, a shy smile adorning his face
your stomach flutters as you stand up from your stool, “mingi, hi, hey, i wasn’t expecting you to come today”
you internally cringe at your own words
you hope he doesn’t pick up on the connotation that you wait for him to come on other days
he peers around hesitantly at your words, “should i, uh, go?”
one of your hands reach out in his direction before you even realise what you’re doing
“no- i meant,” you lick your lips, “it’s a nice surprise”
mingi’s shoulders relax
“i heard some areas lost power because of the snow,” he starts to explain, “so i thought i’d come to check on you- your bar”
your heart grows warm at his seemingly nonchalant words
fighting back a blush, you gesture around your bar, “well, i still got power-”
just as it fizzles and dies
the steady hum of the heater in the background of your bar also halts, creating a world of both darkness and silence
startled, you jump slightly
you can hardly see him in front of you as your eyes struggle to adjust to the gloom, yet mingi’s hand naturally finds your searching ones
he slips your smaller hand into his, gently squeezing and rubbing a thumb over your knuckles as he soothes, “i’ve got you”
you let out a nervous chuckle, not because you feel awkward but because it feels so natural to be soothed by his touch, and he reciprocates with his own soft laugh
“well,” you look up at him, “looks like business is closed for the night”
his eyebrows knit together in concern, “are you sure? i can call someone to get your power back up and running. i know a person”
he scratches the back of his neck as he continues to ramble, “or they could probably fix your whole area…yeah that’s a better idea, wouldn’t want you getting singled out or anything”
you’re not sure whether to be endeared or to be impressed by his connections
“you can do that?!” you gawk
mingi blinks twice as if to say, you can’t?
laughing, you shake your head and pat his hand that’s still holding yours to tell him that it’s okay
“i wasn’t getting customers anyway,” you reassure
selfishly, mingi is glad that you weren’t busy
because it means that he can have you all to himself
“do you want to stay for a bit?” you offer, “it’s probably not safe to leave with all the snow”
mingi is a member of a mafia gang
snow is the least of his worries
but he nods solemnly in agreement anyway
he thinks that his heart cannot squeeze with any more fondness at your concern until you carefully tug him forward by the hand to lead him up the stairs at the back of your bar, murmuring that there’s another step and the doorway’s a little low
it doesn’t matter that you’ve seen him being pursued by other gang members, or that he smells like gunpowder and has a pistol hidden on him - you still look out for him and mingi has to fight the urge to pull you into a hug
instead, he grips your hand a little tighter under the guise of not knowing where he should be stepping
in reality, he wants to make sure that he can keep you steady should you be the one to trip
usually, when the power cuts out like this, you will simply bury yourself under your covers until you fall asleep
but it seems like it’s a common occurrence now - when mingi is by your side, sleep is easy to forget
so you take him to the small room you’ve leased above your bar and it is as though you have both rediscovered the innocent joys of life
hushed giggles are shared as you rifle through your storage and take turns lighting up the stubborn candles you have found
you nudge him as he nudges you back over where to scatter the candles around the room for maximum brightness, both of you falling into another bout of laughter when a particularly hard nudge ends up snuffing the candles in your hands
mingi takes out his phone and creates a playlist of cheesy christmas songs that he lets run in the background
grabbing your hands, he twirls you around the cramped space of your living room as you flush with joy
you shyly let him lead you through his silly little dances, but very quickly, you are both spinning and jumping and swaying barefoot to the music as the candle flames flicker in tandem all around you
the excitement teeters off slowly as the playlist transitions to slower instrumentals and you realise that without the heating on, your room is starting to become freezing
mingi is first to notice, attuned to the way a quick shiver racks your body
“come here,” he says, arms already moving before he can think better of it
he grabs the blanket that covers the back of your small couch and throws half of it over himself, one arm extending the rest of it so that he can wrap it around your form too
mingi slowly rubs his hands up and down the sides of your arms as he shuffles the two of you over to sink down onto the couch
you have to remind yourself to keep breathing, even as his every touch leaves behind a trail of goosebumps and electricity
“better?” he asks after a while
untrusting of your voice, you nod instead whilst clearing your throat, trying not to chase the feeling of his embrace when he retracts his arms from around you
silence falls upon you two
it’s not uncomfortable
but with the lack of noise to distract you, you are acutely aware of his close proximity and the warmth that he emits from your side
“it’s pretty, isn’t it,” he muses, gaze focused on the falling snow outside the window
“it is…”
…with you here
“you know what they say about the first snowfall of the year?” he nudges you softly
you chew on your bottom lip
shyly, you offer, “that if you confess your love it becomes true,” at the exact same time mingi says-
“that you shouldn’t eat the snow for the first hour or two”
you quickly cough and splutter out a question to cover up your statement, “h-how come?”
“the snow absorbs all the bad stuff in the air when it first falls”
the grin on his face makes you think that he may have heard your answer after all
slightly embarrassed, you avert your gaze and fumble for something to say
mingi saves you though
he points at the clock that has just ticked past midnight
“merry christmas, y/n,” he says tenderly
“merry christmas, mingi”
you relish in the moment, not wanting this night to end
“did you have anything you wanted for christmas?” you ask him
he hums in affirmation, slowly mulling over his next words before he answers, “there was someone i wanted to see”
he’s looking ahead, and from where you’re sitting next to him, shoulders brushing with each slight movement, the warm glow of the candles accentuates the sharp slopes of his side profile
you’ve noted this before, but in this moment mingi is beautiful
“did…did you get to see them?” you’re unsure why you’re holding your breath in anticipation
he doesn’t answer straight away
there’s a beat of silence
then he’s slowly turning his head with a gentle smile
“yeah,” he breathes out, looking at you with his soft, round eyes, “yeah, i did”
with your rosy cheeks and bashful expression, mingi cannot help himself
he confesses
“and i still am”
wooyoung
wooyoung very naturally reaches across the counter with the barcode scanner so that he can align the laser with your id badge
he hums happily as your employee discount is applied to the bag of chips he is purchasing
at this point, you don’t even bat an eye
he has long made himself at home in your convenience store whenever you work the night shift
“so,” wooyoung says as he finishes ringing up the price, “why are you working on christmas eve?”
you tilt your head, confused
“why shouldn’t i be working on christmas eve? and why aren’t you working? don’t you need to manage all your lackeys at the boxing rings?”
“no? because it’s christmas eve? everyone takes the week off,” he frowns as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world
you didn’t realise the mafia celebrated christmas too
apparently you say that out loud, because he is suddenly crossing his arms
…a little too defensively for you to take him seriously
“i didn’t know you were the mafia police,” he grumbles, “you gonna pull out a handbook and tell me that section 3.2 bans christmas for the mafia?”
you chuckle as you attempt to appease the childlike fire in his eyes, “sorry, you guys just seem like-”
you think better of your words and pause
“seem like what?”
“nothing”
“what? tell me what you were going to say!”
he pounces on you, attempting to bite your forearm as you squeal and relent
“you guys seem like the type to beat santa up, not celebrate his existence”
he stares at you
you stare at him
“you have three seconds to run,” he tells you
and run you do
filled with glee, you dash out from behind the counter and weave through the narrow aisles in a circle, wooyoung hot on your heels with his own matching shrieks
you both collapse in a fit of uncontrollable laughter when he suddenly switches direction and you end up running straight into his arms
sitting on the dirty floor of your convenience store during the quiet hours of night, your eyes teary from how hard you and wooyoung are laughing, you do not think there is a better way to spend your christmas eve
“i get paid almost double for working today,” you explain when you have both settled back behind the counter, sharing the bag of snacks he paid for earlier
you toss a chip in the air for wooyoung to catch as you continue, “plus, i can’t just take holidays when i want to”
it bounces off his forehead and he fumbles to catch it before it hits the ground
“why not?”
“because my boss won’t let me”
“oh. that’s it?”
“tHaT’s iT? shut the fuck up,” you shove a chip into his mouth as he sniggers
he excuses himself to make a quick call, so you take the opportunity to finish off the remainder of the snacks
hah.
this time, when he walks back in and sees the empty packet, he does bite you
and he makes you buy him another bag as compensation
(honestly, he should be buying you snacks because if you’re honest, you’re pretty sure he has enough money to buy your store and the whole chain)
you’re sharing the second bag of chips - read as: wooyoung being petty and hogging the snacks - when the store is suddenly plunged into dimness for a split second
you look up, blinking as you watch the lights flicker once, twice, and then completely die out with a fizzle
there’s still enough light coming from the frozen section as the standby generator kicks in for you to make out the inside of the store and wooyoung’s raised eyebrow
then the door chimes, alerting you to the arrival of customers
…or not-customers, you suppose
honestly, you should really be used to this by now
two men saunter in with shoulders squared like they own the place
you take one look at their balaclavas and the pistols in their hands and deduce that, “they wouldn’t happen to be some of your friends, right?”
wooyoung steps a little closer to whisper back, “nope”
“well, fuck. you going to do something about them or what?”
“are you kidding me? they’ve got guns”
“you’re part of the mafia. you’re telling me you don’t have one on you?”
he has the fucking nerve to flirt with you as he flexes his arms
“the only guns i got are these bad boys”
the men point their guns threateningly and wooyoung has the common sense to pipe down, both of you raising your hands cautiously
“get in the car,” one of them snarls
wooyoung moves after a split moment of hesitation, arms still raised as he walks towards the door
he looks back at you to see if you are following along, as if you two are taking a walk in the park and not being kidnapped at literal gunpoint
you’re going to roundhouse kick his head off once you make it out of this alive
his stupid gang better be real good at finding people
the kidnappers usher you and wooyoung into the back of a car, a very nice one you must say
it’s spacious and well-cushioned
at least the trip to whatever warehouse or abandoned building they take you to will be a comfy one
the door locks click and you hit the headrest behind you when the driver steps on the accelerator
“jesus christ! can you drive any faster?” wooyoung yells
you jerk your head sideways to look at him in horror
what is he thinking, provoking the armed men like that?
the man in the passenger seat must also share the same thought, because he whips his head around dangerously fast to stare at wooyoung
oh shit shit shit-
he raises a hand
he’s going to shoot wooyoung-
and pulls off his mask
“that’s not what you were saying when you called us 15 minutes ago, wooyoung”
“san?!” you screech in recognition
“hi again, darling,” san greets you with a sweet, dimpled smile, as if everything is okay
the driver also takes off their mask and he looks at you through the rearview mirror as he introduces himself, “hi, i’m mingi!”
you are absolutely incredulous
“you staged a whole fucking kidnapping for fun?”
wooyoung looks overjoyed, “so you can enjoy christmas eve!”
you’re not sure whether you want to laugh or cry at the ridiculousness of the situation
“you do realise the police are going to interrogate me, right?”
“don’t worry. jongho has connections with the police,” san reassures you
“what about the security footage?”
“hongjoong jammed the feed so there’s none,” mingi pipes up
“my boss is going to find out when he comes to check the morning shift”
“nah,” wooyoung waves away your concern this time, “he’ll be out of commission for a solid week or so”
now that catches your attention
sighing, you pinch the bridge of your nose as you close your eyes and ask very calmly, “what did you guys do to my boss?”
wooyoung lets out a weak chuckle as he presses himself a little closer to the car door; a little further away from you
“yeosang may have, uh, knocked him out”
at your silence, he scrambles to redeem the situation, tugging at the end of your shirt for forgiveness, “we made sure to give your boss a pillow for his neck while he’s out cold!”
“you’re insufferable,” you tell him, starting to feel exhilarated from the whole situation
“just for you,” wooyoung puckers his lips teasingly
you sigh to conceal the smile that is starting to creep onto your face, but you are weak for him and he knows, so you don’t pull away when he laces his fingers through your hand
“merry christmas eve,” he beams at you
there’s the faint sound of someone gagging
wooyoung’s adoring gaze doesn’t leave you, not even as he kicks the back of san’s chair hard
you laugh, truly happy and free, “you know i’m still going to get fired for this, right?”
there’s silence
“well,” wooyoung contemplates
and for a split second, you think he is going to offer you a solution for the mess he made
but then again, what did you expect from wooyoung
“does this mean we get to spend christmas together then?”
jongho
jongho has one hand in the pocket of his slacks
his stance is relaxed, even as his other hand aims the gun at the police officers in front of him
they cower despite the abundance of money piled on the table before them and the stars and service strips that decorate their uniforms
after all, what use is dirty money and corrupt power in the face of death?
pathetic
their pleas for mercy fall on deaf ears
several gunshots ring out, followed by the thud of bodies dropping to the ground
elsewhere, you notice that it’s nearly time for you to clock out
it’s christmas eve and you are not spending a minute longer than you need to here in this hellhole
double checking that your badge is somewhere in your bag, you make a move to leave the police station when there is a sudden influx of noise
pagers beep, phones ring, voices shout
your ears perk up to catch the conversation and you hear the same few names leaving the lips of the police officers around you
the blood coursing through your veins freezes
because you know these names
these names have been burned into your brain, only recently, but still to the point where you can see them clearly whenever you close your eyes
they’re all officials in positions of high power, spending their days in air-conditioned offices and not actually doing anything apart from accepting bribes
but the thing that truly links them together - the secret that quite possibly, of the people in the station right now, only you’ve discovered through your connections - is that they are all involved in covering up the death of an officer five years ago
your father’s death
jongho and his gang have made sure that your father’s murderer has paid the price with his own life-
“all killed?!” you hear the police of chief gush with disbelief
-as have the corrupt officers who buried your father’s case, so it seems
a sense of calm settles over you
the clock tells you that it’s now three minutes past the end of your shift
the news is not a bad note to end on before your two-day christmas break
you sling your bag over your shoulder while the rest of the officers continue to speculate with nervous energy
the police force had no qualms turning their back on you years ago, so neither do you on them
you leave
when you make your way home, back to the modest apartment you now share with jongho, you are greeted by the smell of a cooking meal and the warmth of the blasting heater
you enter the open kitchen whilst removing your scarf
jongho is there in his suit, his coat slung over the back of a chair, tossing an assortment of diced vegetables into a pot of boiling soup
his sleeves have been rolled up to his elbows and you feel your throat go a little dry when the muscles along his forearm flex as he holds up the chopping board
you notice there are streaks of dried blood across his sleeves
and you would be concerned about the blood if this weren’t such a common occurrence
you know now that it’s never his own
when he notices your quiet presence, jongho turns to look at you the same way he always does whenever you come home from work
like he can never quite believe that you’re here with him after so many years apart
he greets you, smiling with anticipation, “did you like my christmas present?”
your mind flashes back to the frenzied panic at the station just earlier
“that was you?”
the smirk you receive is more than enough of an answer to your question
“you didn’t have to, jongho,” but despite your words, you walk over appreciatively into his outstretched arms
“of course i did,” he shushes you with a deep kiss as his arms wrap around you tightly. “nobody messes with my girl”
his words send a hot rush right through your body
the corner of his lips quirks as he feels you squirm a little in his hold
“cop or not,” he nudges your head to the side so he has easy access to nip at your throat, “you’re mine to protect”
you fist the front of his shirt in an attempt to hold back a needy whine, instead, letting out a shaky breath that does little to hide how affected you are
in a last-ditch effort to take control of the situation, you take a step back and reach into the side pocket of your uniform to pull out your handcuffs
“too bad this cop is going to arrest you for murder,” you joke
jongho cannot help but smile at the cocky facade you put on when your cheeks are so clearly flushed
he brings his wrists together in front of him and offers his hands to you
“are you going to frisk me too, officer?”
when you swallow, now silent, jongho continues, “i might be armed with something that could…destroy you”
a shiver of excitement runs through you and it doesn’t go unnoticed
he steps forward to close the gap between you both, one hand reaching for the handcuffs hanging loosely from your grasp
jongho pauses when his fingers touch the cool metal, waiting for you to look at him properly
you see his eyes darting between your own as he searches for any signs of discomfort or hesitation
can i?
you let go of the handcuffs so that they are in his hold alone
yes
his gaze turns predatory almost immediately
“my turn,” he rasps lowly
he flips you around so that you face the kitchen counter, grabbing your arms and holding them behind you
you are pliant under his touch, but you cannot deny that it turns you on when he is a little rougher with you
jongho cuffs your wrists together and he waits as you tug on them experimentally
you feel the flutter of his fingertips dancing around where the metal surrounds your wrists
“is this okay?” he asks, voice gentle again
you reassure him, “yeah, more than okay,” before you emphasise your words by grinding your ass back against him
he tuts with a chuckle as he stands steady behind you, allowing you to use his rapidly-hardening cock for stimulation while his hands rest on your waist
it’s not enough though
“touch me, please,” you breathe out
“please, who?” he teases, hands sliding up and down your sides but never adding any pressure
your thighs clench because you know exactly what he wants
“please, officer,” you beg
“see, that wasn’t so hard,” jongho whispers right into your ear
the buttons on your uniform blouse are suddenly undone and in one swift motion, he yanks your bra down to expose your breasts
his fingers find your nipples easily, familiar with every inch of your body, and you let out a gasp of pleasure when he pinches them
he pins your hips against the countertop with his own, clothed bulge pressing firmly into you
your cuffed hands scrabble to find purchase when he nudges your legs open with his thigh
but then all of a sudden, his heated touches and wandering hands disappear
the whine you let out at the loss of his presence is almost pathetic as you twist your head around to look for him
“give me a second, baby, i just need to,” he steps over to the bubbling pot of soup and twists the knob down on the stove, “adjust the fire”
you bend forward onto the countertop, exposing the wet patch that you are sure has started to show on the crotch of your pants
“jongho,” you start to beg again, “i want to cum”
“i know, baby, but i don’t want to burn our house down and i want to make sure i get to feed you dinner,” he strides back to you in two quick steps
“now that that’s sorted,” he turns your body around so that you’re facing him, “i think it’s time for my appetiser”
he swiftly tugs your pants and panties down, kneeling to tap on your ankles lightly, a silent request for you to step out of your clothes
he tosses them to one side before his hands come back up to grip either of your thighs so that he can spread your legs
you brace your cuffed hands against the edge of the countertop behind you
it’s not the most comfortable position to be in, but then jongho is using his fingers to spread your pussy apart and your ability to form any coherent thought leaves your body
he blows lightly on your clit, enjoying the way you flinch at the sensation
“look at you,” he drags a fingertip at an agonisingly slow pace through your folds, “already so wet when i’ve barely even touched you”
he holds you still when you try to grind down on his finger
“use your words, baby,” he grins up at you with a smug expression
“i need y-”
he cuts your words right off by attaching his lips to your clit, drawing out a strangled cry of pleasure from you
you feel the long-awaited stretch of your pussy as jongho foregoes one finger and plunges two digits straight into your hole
“fuck!” the curse slips out of you when he sucks and licks your clit in time with the thrusts of his fingers scissoring in and out of you
he curls a finger and your knees very nearly buckle from under you, your back arching as jongho groans against your pussy and continues to abuse the sensitive spot he has found
a pressure starts to build in your core
“i’m close,” you manage to choke out
you miss the moment jongho briefly removes his lips to glance to his side, replacing his mouth with a thumb to rub harsh circles against your clit, before he tells you, “not yet, baby”
“i can’t, jongho, please, let me cum,” you plead
“wait, hang in there a little longer. i know you can,” yet despite his words, he shoves his fingers up harder with renewed vigour
you almost sob from desperation, “wait for fucking what?! your dick isn’t even in me!”
“just a little longer, baby,” he reassures you as your thighs shake around him
you can’t do it anymore
you have to cum
you have to-
“cum,” he simply says, before reattaching his mouth to your clit
your orgasm rips through you and you cannot do anything but tremble and shudder under the administrations of his tongue and fingers
jongho holds you through it all, milking out your orgasm until its very last waves-
just as the timer on the stove goes off
“what the fuck?” you blurt out
your mind is still hazy from pleasure but you’re pretty fucking sure he just timed your orgasm with the stove
jongho licks his fingers with a brazen smile and then goes over to peer into his pot of soup
after he gives it a final stir, he turns the fire off completely and places a lid on the top to keep it warm
you watch, rendered speechless
except when he turns back around, you stay silent for a completely different reason
he eyes you hungrily as he strips his tie and unbuttons his dress shirt
“round two, baby”
he grabs your cuffed hands and guides you towards your shared bedroom, then fishes out the keys from your blouse
you welcome the feeling of jongho unlocking your handcuffs for a moment of rest
settling against the head of the bed, you watch as jongho fully sheds his shirt and lets it drop to the ground
he unzips his slacks and his cock springs free, the bulbous head a tantalising pink as he easily strokes himself to full erection
your pussy clenches desperately around nothing in anticipation and jongho watches your own arousal leak out
he gathers your wrists together once more and pins them above you, handcuffing you to the headboard as you completely submit to him
jongho leans over you and encases your smaller frame with his muscular build
his voice is low and teasing
“you have the right to remain silent,” he says as he aligns his girthy length with your entrance, “but i doubt you will”
#loren writes#ateez fics#ateez x reader#ateez ot8 x reader#ateez smut#ateez angst#ateez fluff#hongjoong x reader#hongjoong smut#seonghwa x reader#yunho x reader#yunho smut#yeosang x reader#san x reader#mingi x reader#wooyoung x reader#jongho x reader#jongho smut#ateez scenarios#ateez imagines#ateez headcanons#ateez au#mafia ateez
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
POLY!ATEEZ FIC RECS PART 1
Part 2 - Hongjoong - Seonghwa - Yunho - Yeosang - San - Mingi - Wooyoung - Jongho
A collection of Ateez fics that I think everyone should know about!!! This has been QUITE the project, but I'm so happy to have done it. Unfortunately not all my recs could fit on one post so there will be at least one other part to this list, as well as individual member lists. (i really thought i could fit them all on one post lmaooo) I hope you enjoy and support these authors!!
DISCLAIMER none of these works are mine and majority are MATURE 18+, please review all warnings before reading!!!
Key:
✨ - My Favs
🔥 - Smut (MINORS DNI)
⛈️ - Angst
💗 - Fluff
🍑 - Humor
POLY!ATEEZ
Sway With Me - @luvt0kki 🔥⛈️ Sci-fi ✧ Ongoing
the world 🤌 the story 🤌 the SMUT 🤌🤌🤌 but truly this fic is such a fun take on a sci-fi adventure. im already obsessed with the mc, AND HER AND WOO'S CHEMISTRY?!?! off the charts sooooo good like 👏👏👏 the interlude has me a tiny bit nervous because now i know how well this author writes angst and yeah its gonna be a doozy 😩😩
Wonderwall - @atzfilm ✨🔥⛈️ Yandere ✧ Faerie AU ✧ Ongoing
i realized pretty quickly that yandere is much more popular in this fandom than in previous ones i've been in, so i never really read any. HOWEVER, i get it now i do lmao. this was the first one i read, and i was HOOKED like i couldn't stop reading! the story just like took over my brain, and i am thinking why am i sympathizing with the guys BUT I AM BECAUSE THEY ARE COMPLEX AND SO INTERESTING AND WELL WRITTEN!!!!! its hard to put into words how much i love this series
The Answer - @berryunho ✨🔥⛈️ Cult AU ✧ Ongoing
i genuinely don't think i've ever read a fic like this, and i mean that in literally the best way possible. i was STRESSED reading this like there are so many scenes that make me question everything, but like there is no one to trust about what is actually happening. idk if i'm making sense but this fic just needs to be read to understand the legit anxiety it gives me in certain chapters lmaooo😭😭
Deep Down - @seventhcallisto 🔥⛈️💗 ABO AU ✧ 9th Member AU ✧ Ongoing
this is just self indulgent fun AND THAT PEOPLE IS WHAT FANFICTION IS MEANT TO BE!!! like im just kicking my feet reading about this 9th member ateez finding out she's an omega!~ i'm having the TIME OF MY LIFE!
Into the Aurora - @honeyhotteoks ✨🔥⛈️💗 Idol AU ✧ Complete
this soooo quickly became my main comfort fic for ateez! like i have reread this TOO many times. sometimes i'll just revisit specific chapters, but i know the exact chapter number.... is that concerning? lmaooo~ but truly this is more than just a you date every member of ateez fic (WHICH ARE GREAT DONT GET IT TWISTED!!) but the more we learn of the mc the more i adore her and her relationship with the boys!! it's just a must read ok 👏👏
Inception - @remedyx ✨🔥⛈️💗 Dragon!Teez ✧ Royalty AU ✧ Ongoing
my brain is still stuck in this world tbh, like its maybe a bit embarrassing how many times i look at the map and moodboards and just vibe and think about this fic lmaoo! but honestly the world building is so thoughtful and its so easy to just immerse yourself in it which is amazing!!!!!!!
Dragon from the Window - @thelargefrye ✨🔥⛈️💗 Dragon!Teez ✧ Fantasy AU ✧ Ongoing
this collection of one shots, drabbles, headcanons, and world building i went through SO QUICKLY I WAS IMMEDIATLY OBSESSED. i am so genuinely invested in this story and how each member react to their connection with the mc!!!! ALSO the mc is a witch SO BIG BONUS POINTS!!!!~
like the moon - @sunmoonjune ✨⛈️💗 Warrior AU ✧ Clan Systems ✧ Ongoing
try not to cry challenge - FAILED, MULTIPLE TIMES 😭😭 this is major hurt/comfort, but its truly such a beautiful story!! i would do anything ANYTHING for gray!!!!! all of them deserve the absolute best in the world and i just adore them so much 🥹🥹🥹
Morning Mist - @mint-yooxgi ⛈️💗 Dragon!Teez ✧ Yandere ✧ Ongoing
another story with an mc that is just 🤌🤌🤌 like she is so badass i'm in love but also scared lmao,, but i think if you are new to yandere, this is a good starting point! like yes they are obsessed but not like terrifyingly so if that makes sense~
MULTIPLE MEMBERS
This Night Together - @honeyhotteoks ✨🔥⛈️💗 Yunho x Reader x Mingi ✧ ABO ✧ Ongoing
listen i'm a bit of a slut for ABO fics and this one!!!! THIS ONE IS SO FUCKING GOOD!!!!!!!!! im like just in love with all of them not just yungi n reader but EVERYONE (except u minseok u bitch) like not only is the main plot so good but the side plots for the other members is just incredible,, i just love this story too ok if you see this author know that every fic they write is going to be a comfort fic for me 🥹🥹
Project Omen - @atzfilm 🔥⛈️ Hongjoong x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Hybrid AU ✧ One Shot
Bouncy - @hongism 🔥Yunho x Reader x Jongho ✧ Mechanic AU ✧ One Shot
splish splash - @atozfic 🔥San x Seonghwa x Wooyoung x Yunho x Reader ✧ Swimmer AU ✧ One Shot
sharing is caring? - @byuntrash101 🔥Hongjoong x Reader x Mingi ✧ Idol AU ✧ One Shot
Untitled - @orgverse 🔥Seonghwa x Reader x San ✧ Idol AU ✧ One Shot
Untitled - @cheollipop 🔥San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ One Shot
Threesome with Yungi with woosan watching - @k-hotchoisan 🔥Yunho x Reader x Mingi (San and Wooyoung) ✧ One Shot
one more rep - @cheollipop 🔥San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Personal Trainer AU ✧ One Shot
blue bird - @seonghwaddict 🔥💗San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Mafia AU ✧ One Shot
What's the Time, Mr. Wolf - @starlitmark 🔥Yunho x Reader x Mingi ✧ Hybrid AU ✧ One Shot
the good friend + the better friend - @byuntrash101 ✨🔥San x Reader x Mingi ✧ Idol AU ✧ Two Shot
as a sangi bias this fic changed my life maybe?!! the smut is just toe curling ESPECIALLY PART TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!! literally i could drool just thinking about this fic 🤤🤤 i need this to be my reality ASAP
Untitled - @ja3hwa 🔥Seonghwa x Yunho x Mingi x Reader ✧ Business (?) AU ✧ One Shot
knockout - @igbylicious 🔥San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Boxer AU ✧ One Shot
Untitled - @sanspuppet 🔥Hongjoong x Reader x Seonghwa ✧ One Shot
Untitled - @thetypingpup 🔥San x Reader x Mingi ✧ One Shot
Time of Love - @desayunho ⛈️💗 San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ SMAU ✧ Complete
compromise - @cyberpxnk 🔥⛈️ Seonghwa x Reader x Yunho ✧ College AU ✧ Soccer AU ✧ One Shot
Untitled - @cheollipop 🔥San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ One Shot
cheerleader - @byuntrash101 🔥Seonghwa x Yunho x San x Ming x Reader ✧ One Shot
from eden + Pt. 2 - @atzfilm 🔥⛈️ Seonghwa x Reader x Yeosang ✧ Vampire AU ✧ Two Shot
whichever way - @igbylicious 🔥💗 San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Neighbors AU ✧ Ongoing
Under the Comforter - @thelargefrye 🔥Seonghwa x Reader x San ✧ Idol AU ✧ One Shot
Double Trouble - @kitten4sannie 🔥 Wooyoung x Reader x Jongho ✧ Hybrid AU ✧ One Shot
What Should We Become? - @sluttywoozi 🔥💗 Yeosang x Reader x San ✧ One Shot
like a dream - @cheollipop ✨🔥💗 Yunho x Reader x Mingi ✧ One Shot
this is like so incredibly hot, literally all i need in life is to be in between these two men 😩😩😩 but it is also so sweet and both boys are so doting to the mc and the end!!!!!!!!!! so loving and cute and aaaaaaaaaaaa 😭😭😭
SCENARIOS/TEXTS/HEADCANONS
ateez as royals who fall for you (hyungs, maknaes) - @eightmakesonebraincell 🔥⛈️💗 Royalty AU ✧ Scenarios
subby ateez - @seventhcallisto 🔥Headcanons
Ateez cumming too soon - @sluttywonwoo 🔥Headcanons
soft cuddles with ateez - @beenbaanbuun 💗 Scenarios
first kiss with ateez - @beenbaanbuun 💗 Scenarios
Ateez and pussy slapping - @kitten4sannie 🔥Scenarios
Bedroom Mishaps (hyungs, maknaes) - @seohwang 🔥💗 Scenarios
Ateez 'n free use - @seventhcallisto 🔥 Scenarios
Cupping their Cheeks - @yeorisanaxox 💗 Scenarios
Ateez as Exes + Pt. 2 - @kisshwa 🍑 Texts
Friends to Lovers Headcanons - @kpopnstarwars 💗 Scenario
boyfriend!ateez discovering you write smut - @eightmakesonebraincell 🍑 Texts
Ateez being overstimulated (hyungs, maknaes) - @ateezscupid ✨🔥 Scenarios
listen i just like sub!ateez a lot 😭😭 but like these are such a go too for me when i NEED some dom!reader content like it is so cute/hot/toe curlingly delicious 🤤🤤🤤
mtl of who would like choking - @sxcret-garden 🔥 Headcanons
texts when they think you’re asleep - @beenbaanbuun 💗🍑 Texts
#ateez#kim hongjoong#park seonghwa#jeong yunho#kang yeosang#choi san#song mingi#jung wooyoung#choi jongho#ateez fic recs#fic recs#ateez smut#ateez angst#ateez fluff#ateez x reader#fic rec masterlist#in celebration of chellateez week 2~~#merengue makes lists
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
21:23pm
"I'm closed Y/n" Wooyoung huffs, back facing you as he continues to clean down his station thoroughly.
You knew they were closed. You knew coming in here you'd probably be walking out without a tattoo, but something dragged you from your couch to the little tattoo shop you've grown so fond of, or perhaps more fittingly, the tattoo artist who you can't seem to get enough of. "Just a small one Woo please, it'll only take a few minutes!" you protest, sitting yourself down on his table, much to his dismay.
"I just cleaned that" Wooyoung groans, stopping in his tracks to look at the progress you've undone.
"Come on Woo, it'll take like ten minutes" you practically beg at this point.
"Sorry pretty girl," Wooyoung utters nonchalantly, moving so his hands lie on either side of your waist, his face deadly close to yours, causing your breath to hitch, "You and I both know it doesn't take ten minutes. I have to sketch it u-"
"Free hand it."
Wooyoung has to hold back his laughter at that one, "Y/n you're insane" he chuckles, shaking his head lightly. That smile. That stupid, stupid smile that keeps dragging you back here, and subsequently adding a number of tattoos to your body, all from the heavily tattoed man in front of you. You can't help but to admire the tattoos decorating his arms and neck, all so delicately placed, all telling a story.
"Wooyoung" you plead, hooking your finger around the chain hanging from his neck, dragging him even closer to your face, "I trust you. You're the best tattoo artist I know. Please?"
Honestly, you don't know what bravery grew in you to drag the dark haired boy close to you by the necklace like that, and neither does he clearly, his eyes growing wide for just half a second, just one half second of the tough boy facade falling. The same bravery grows in Wooyoung, clearly, as he leans closer, placing a delicate kiss under your ear, causing your cheeks to flush immediately.
Before you could even say anything, Wooyoung's back is once again to you, walking over to where he had just packed away his equipment. "So what tattoo are you thinking?" the boy questions.
"Wait you'll do it?"
"How could I say no to you pretty girl."
—
requests open!!
main masterlist <3
#ateez#atz#wooyoung#jung wooyoung#ateez wooyoung#atz wooyoung#ateez au#ateez scenarios#ateez x reader#ateez timestamps#ateez imagines#wooyoung x reader#wooyoung imagines#wooyoung timestamps#wooyoung scenarios#wooyoung au#wooyoung fluff#wooyoung smut#wooyoung angst#ateez fluff#ateez smut#ateez angst
611 notes
·
View notes
Note
Can you please do a wooyoung smut where y/n and him having a fight at a family event than he make it up for her at home
Love you and your wonderful work 💗💗💗
Ik this took like forever to post but here I am lovely! 😭 I hope you like it tho :33
ᴋɪꜱꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ
PAIRING: Husband! Wooyoung x f! Reader
SYNOPSIS: An argument with your husband always led to kissing and making up.
GENRE: Angst in the start, fluff and smut
WORD COUNT: 1.8k
WARNINGS/CONTENT: Couple arguments (it's not mentioned what the fight is about-), y/n and Wooyoung are rude to each other in the start, a little bit of crying, making up, praising, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, body worshiping (slightly)
The atmosphere was tense, it was suffocating you, but obviously you couldn't get out of there. You could sense the rage coming off of Wooyoung as he started daggers to the back of your head which was quite perfectly visible through the mirror.
The both of you had visited your parents house out of the blue, and you currently stayed in your old bedroom. None of you wanted to cause the tension that was created at the moment, but the guilt of having to fight in front of your parents was eating you up.
“Will you fucking talk to me, Y/n? We can end this fight for the sake of us and your parents.” Although his tone was masked with anger, you could hear the desperation in him to want to be in your arms again, to hold you close just like he had two nights before.
Your shaky hands manage to fix the earrings onto your ears. Tears welled up in your eyes as you looked back at the man you swore in front of your family to love forever. “What is there for us to talk about? What do you want me to do, Jung Wooyoung?” Your voice cracked unbearably, and soon, unbeknownst to you, a lone tear escaped the corner of your eyes.
“There really isn't anything we can talk about? How is this gonna end up? Giving silent treatment to each other till the other person decides to give in and we never solve the damn argument? We're not fucking teenagers Y/n!” His voice raised with every single word he spat out, his eyes mirroring yours as desperate tears escape both of your eyes.
Before you could get a word out, there was a knock on your door that interrupted the both of you. The door opened to reveal your parents standing in the doorway, “Mom?”
She took a few steps into the room, I- um- was just wondering if the both of you were ready-” Before your mother could finish her sentence, Wooyoung unintentionally cuts in between. “Mom, We'll be leaving.” Hearing his words, your hand snaps towards him. “WHAT?”
Your mother was caught off guard by your screech but decided it was best to not interrupt the two of you. “We- kinda have something to take care of back home, We apologize for the inconvenience.” You didn't have the opportunity to retort back to him once your eyes noticed the way he looked at you, desperately trying to get you to say ‘yes’, trying to make it up to you.
There was thick silence settled around the both of you, your hands twisting the fabric of your dress in your hands while you leaned back in the seat. There was not one exchange of words between you, while your glassy eyes stared out of the window.
Wooyoung sent quick glances your way, in hopes you did not notice, or at least that's what he thought.
You knew the guilt would be crawling up your neck for slamming the car door shut in front of his face before he could come up to you or for walking away without a word nor a glance towards him.
Wooyoung clenched his fist due to that, he was hurt by all the cold actions you directed towards him for the past three days. But he had had enough of the cold shoulder, he needed to show you how much he loved you, how much he cared.
Thus, he follows you into the room, to be welcomed with the sight of you washing the last remnants of makeup on your face. He does not refrain from sprinting towards you to wrap his arms around you.”I’m so fucking sorry baby, I’ve been nothing but an asshole to you. But it hurts to have you like this, to have us like this- fucking hell- it feels like I suffered decades without having you in my arms although it has barely been a week.”
Tears soon well up in your own voice when you hear his voice break next to you, and you swiftly turn around in his hold, wrapping your arms around his torso. “I missed us too.”
There were no loud cries or sobs, just the tiny sniffles here and there, all while the both of you leaned against each other in the warmth of your own house.
Pulling away, you raise your head to meet your lips to his, your arms tightening around his neck. His hands around your waist pull you closer as he deepens the kiss. Your soft lips fit so snuggly against his plumpy lips like usual – you smile contently into the kiss.
The both of you slowly part away but his lips do not leave your skin as he trails down to your jaw. You huff out a long breath – which you had kept in for who knows how long – “Woo” Your hands caress his shoulder softly. Wooyoung hums against your skin, and he allows his tempted lips to leave a few wet kisses before he pulls away to be inches away from your face.
“Will you let me make it up to you, princess?” His voice and tone was so gentle, so keen on just giving you anything you wanted. A relieved exhale leaves your lips again and your lips part in a smile. “Be gentle” The phrase was almost like a question rather than a request but Wooyoung nevertheless hoisted you up in his arms, with the softest smile painting his face. “Gonna show you how much I love you princess” He utters as he moves you to your own comfortable bedroom.
His arms slowly place you down on the mattress, so gentle that he probably mistook you for glass. The tip of his nose wiggles against your nose drawing a small giggle from you before he trails down to your cleavage. His hands had already sneaked under the straps of your minidress.
His fingers slowly push your dress down to your waist, hunching the cloth around your torso. “So fucking pretty” His lips pucker as the kissed down to your breasts, leaving behind a wet trails on your body. The soft contact had you whimpering in pleasure, the touch was neither long nor rough but rather they felt like a feather being drawn over your body – ever so softly and gently.
A loud whimper is all you could get out when his fingers finally make contact with your wet cunt over your soaked panties, it was barely a graze but your long ignored cunt was luring him for a taste – which he'd rather die than pass upon.
With that said, Wooyoung's face was in between your thighs within the span of a mere seconds, his fingers quite impatiently pulling off the slick covered fabric. His equally impatient tongue licks up a strip of your slick and a groan sweetly falls off your lips. Wooyoung beamed at the reaction, taking it as a cue to press his tongue against your lips, lapping against them like a starved man – which he quite literally was for you.
It hadn't taken Wooyoung much long to have your back arching against the bed, your fingers intertwining with his hair strands as your lips left loud babbles. “W-Woo- fucking hell- gonna cum!” You barely got those words out of your mouth before his hands wrapped around your thighs, his nose pushing further into your clit making finish around his tongue in a second.
And Wooyoung took it all, his tongue slurping at your climax while you laid there for a few seconds. Make-up sex with Wooyoung might be different most of the time but one thing was sure – he gave you orgasms that had you brain-dead for a few seconds.
A small smile dances on his lips – content with his mind blowing eating out skills – before his hand reaches down to your hair, brushing it softly. “You okay, princess?”
You nod swiftly, coming down from your high while your panting still resonated throughout the room. “Want you- right now, Woo, please-” Your sentence was interrupted by his index finger pressing down on your lips – shutting you up. “Ah Ah princess, you need to lie back and enjoy alright? I'm gonna take my sweet time with you tonight.”
If you had the brain cells to think, you would be pissed at him for teasing you in your “vulnerable” state but all you could do right now was give him a nod.
Wooyoung's fingers slid over your folds, “So worn out yet so wet already. I think you're ready for my cock already princess.” You barely think of speaking up in agreement when the clinking noise of his belt unbuckling sends excitement rushing down your spine.
You had to admit, Make-up sex with your husband equalized the adrenaline rush the jealous sex with him gave you. His soft words and touches always contradicted his rough and hard thrusting during this – and you savored it all up.
Wooyoung didn't need to scan your face to know your eager eyes looking down at your bodies as he slid his cock in between your pussy. Your lips threatened to give up and beg him to just stuff his cock in – until he did it. He pushed in between your inner walls ever so smoothly, all while your nails found comfort in digging into the flesh of his back.
There were loud groans from him while his – accordingly impatient – hips rammed into yours. His lips only curl up in a satisfied smirk watching the way your face twisted in pleasure. “if your slutty cunt wasn't enough, your fucked out expressions make me want to fuck the daylights out of you, princess.”
His words surely had your cunt tightening around his dick, his hips turning strained for a moment before they picked up a faster pace. “Got all weak for a few words, that you’re clenching around me baby?”
Wooyoung’s dick always had an impact on you – and that was to turn you into a mindless babbling mess. You could barely pick your brain back up to respond to his words when your hips shook from the sudden orgasm that hit you faster than a train.
You yelped and buried your face into his shoulders, while Wooyoung chased his own orgasm which was soon followed by yours thanks to your clenching cunt.
“I love you” The sudden confession escaping your lips felt surreal to the both of you, but Wooyoung was not phased a bit. “I love you too, princess.” Your eyes sparkled up at him, a silly smile painted all over your face. The same one that never changed ever since you met him. But they never failed to turn his cheeks flushed red. There may have been or will be a lot of arguments between the two of you – but it won't take long to Kiss and Make up.
#ateez#ateez smut#ateez smut imagine#ateez imagines#ateez smut imagines#ateez x reader#wooyoung#wooyoung smut#wooyoung smut imagine#wooyoung imagines#wooyoung x reader smut#wooyoung x reader#ateez angst#ateez fluff#ateez oneshot#ateez x reader smut
458 notes
·
View notes
Text
mirror mirror — jung wooyoung
in which wooyoung hates it when you call yourself anything less than beautiful.
bf!jung wooyoung x fem!reader. genre. established relationship. fluff. slight angst. smut. warnings. reader wears a dress, reader is a little insecure, explicit sexual content mdni, mirror sex, fingering, praise, soft dom!wooyoung, overstimulation, nicknames (baby, babe, babygirl, pretty girl). wc. 1.3k. rating. mature.
lilo’s notes. i’ll try to post as much as i can in the next few days as i likely won’t be online much for the two weeks after the next one!!
listening to. aphrodite by rini
masterlist.
you came home from a long day out with your friends, shopping and whatnot. as soon as you stepped through the front door of the small apartment you shared with your boyfriend, he felt himself get dragged from the couch to the bedroom, pushed down to sit on the bed while you set some bags down in the walk-in closet.
“what’re you doing, baby?” he’d laughed, leaning back with his palms planted on the mattress.
“let me show you the clothes i got!” even though he’d been in the middle of watching a movie, he couldn’t say no to the excited look on your face.
you closed the door of the walk-in closet to change. he thought it was cute, really—he’d seen you naked many times yet you were still too shy to change in front of him. each time you stepped out of the closet you were wearing something new, some skirts, some hoodies. you’d twirl around, he’d tell you how beautiful he thought you were, and you’d return to the closet to change into another thing, face warm from his praises.
even though he gave different opinions on each clothing item, wooyoung knew he’d find you attractive no matter what you wore.
one time, you let him style you when neither of you had places to be due to a storm. his laugher echoed through the apartment as you wore exactly what he chose. a blue shark onesie he’d found stuffed into a corner of your side of the closet. it was silly and you hadn’t worn it in years, but he still thought you were the cutest thing he’d laid his eyes on.
the final thing you showed him was a little babydoll dress, the silky fabric a light pink. the hem was lined with little white ruffles and reached between the middle of your thighs and your hips. clearly meant to be used as a nightgown, the skirt flowed smoothly as you twirled around.
wooyoung stared, in awe by your figure. his tongue darted out to lick his suddenly dry lips, mouth opening to say something before closing again. he couldn’t believe he was so lucky to see you like this.
you, however, mistook his lack of words, hesitantly turning around to look at the mirror across from the bed with a frown, fiddling with the hem of the dress nervously.
“i think… i think it’s a nice dress.” your voice was quiet, meek, the corners of your lips tugged into a light frown. “it probably would look better on anyone else, though…”
wooyoung snapped out if his trance at that, brows furrowing as he looked at your face through the mirror before he came to the realisation that you’re second guessing yourself because of him.
“that’s not true, i think you look great in it. more than great, even,” he was quick to reassure you but you didn’t respond, only glancing at his reflection for a second before looking away with flushed cheeks. “come here, baby.”
his hands reached out to your hips, turning you to face him and pulling you to stand between his spread knees. his hands gave your hips a gentle squeeze, thumbs caressing the soft fabric as he looked up at you with the most tender of eyes.
“you’re the most beautiful girl in the world, you know,” he whispered, placing a quick kiss to the tiny bow between your breasts, “i don’t want you to ever think otherwise, okay?”
“but-“
“no buts.” he cut you off firmly, eyebrows furrowed before his features softened again. a wave of silence washed over the two of you, butterflies raging in your stomach with each caress of his hands. his eyes diverted from yours for a moment, an idea flashing in his mind as he caught sight of the mirror before looking back up at you.
“let me show you how pretty you are to me, baby.”
without waiting for you to respond, he turned you around once more and dragged you onto his lap. his grey sweatpants felt warm beneath your bare legs, the nightgown barely covering you as you leaned to rest your back against his firm chest. a shudder nearly ran through your body as he pressed tender kisses to your neck before resting his chin on your shoulder, eyes licking with your through the mirror.
“so lovely and all for me,” he muttered against your ear lowly, holding you in place with his hands on your thigh. “i wanted to rip this dress off you as soon as you walked through the door. though i’m sure you knew that, hm?”
one of his hands moved up, pinching the ruffles between his fingers and lifting the skirt to reveal you hadn’t put on panties when you changed into this. you opened your mouth to say something but he beat you to it, chuckling at how flustered you looked.
“it’s okay, babe, no need to be embarrassed.” he pressed a kiss behind your ear, lingering for a moment before reconnecting his gaze with yours. more hushed words left his plush lips but you had a hard time comprehending them, distracted by how one hand travelled upwards to squeeze one of your breasts through the dress while the other hooked your legs on either side of his.
before you knew it, you were a whimpering mess on his lap. he’d nudged the thin strap if the dress from your shoulders, letting it pool at your waist. you felt him everywhere. one hand between your legs and the other alternating between squeezing your breasts and reading your nipples. his lips busied themselves with whispering dirty praised against your ear, pausing to kiss, bite and suck at your neck or shoulders.
you whined his name as a second finger slipped into you, pushing in until his second knuckle, prodding at that spot that had you seeing stars, before pulling out again just to repeat it over and over again. his thumb circled your swollen clit steadily, wet sounds made by his fingers rubbing against your slick.
and when you finished in five minutes, you gasped and cried out softly, fingers digging into the comforter of your bed as you back arched off his chest. his fingers pulled out but he continued rubbing slow circles on your clit, helping you ride out your orgasm.
“there you go, babygirl,” a kiss against your temple and another below your jaw, “look at yourself.”
his hand left your breast to take ahold of your chin, directing you to face the mirror. your hair was dishevelled and eyes barely open, chest heaving with heavy breaths, nipples erect. your thighs twitched with each circle of his middle and ring fingers. you couldn’t see your core, covered by his hand, but the soft lamp light made the slick smeared at the top of your inner thighs glisten with each twitch. beautiful.
“see how pretty you are now?” he cooed softly, finding the way you twitch from the gentle overstimulation adorable. “who’s my pretty girl, hm? say it, baby.”
“i-i am.”
“that’s right,” you watched his reflection nod before both his hands moved to your waist, pulling the nightgown over your head and tossing aside. a kiss between your shoulders, just below the base if your neck. “so you know you’re pretty now?”
you respond with a nod of your own.
“that’s my good girl. now,” he lifted you off his lap and a moment later you were placed on the bed as he kneeled between your legs, nudging your shoulder to lay down, winking. “lay back and relax, baby, i’m not done with you yet.”
networks. @cromernet @wonderlandnet @cultofdionysusnet
taglist. @ad0rechuu @sankatchu @mlink64 @yeosangsbb @seonghwasbbgirl @likexaxdaydream @dreamingofyeo
#cromernet#wonderlandnet#wooyoung x reader#wooyoung fluff#wooyoung fanfic#wooyoung angst#wooyoung smut#ateez smut#ateez x reader#ateez imagines
656 notes
·
View notes
Text
Strawberry Mocha
𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫.: your favorite café has a new barista, and he seems oddly familiar, especially when you see his hands move when he prepares your favourite beverage
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jung wooyoung x reader, ft yunho
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 24.7k
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: barista!wooyoung, student!reader, camboy!wooyoung, virgin!reader, hopelesslyinlove!yunho
𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: masturbation, mutual masturbation, sexting, public oral, public fingering, blindfold, slight bondage, toys, edging
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, v-card loss, angst on yunho's side
𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: pussy drunk wooyo idk man also i imagine wooyo as bouncy wooyo here with that hot ass hair purr but make it oreo like he had it in aotm
𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫: 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫s 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐲.
nsfw link(s): one
anastasya wants to chat! click here to see one new message.
"hello, gorgeous. want to see my pussy?" - tina, less than 10 km away.
luciano is more than ready to show you the 8th world wonder.
"close. close. close." your words are synchronized with the clicking of your mouse. with each minute passing, each click is getting more aggressive.
sick and tired of all the sex ads interrupting your studying over an illegally found textbook, you bury your head into your pillow. your back hurts from laying on your stomach for hours, but it is the only position that helps you with period cramps. the laptop makes a noise again, one you've heard enough of for the last few hours.
"i really don't want to fuck you, nick." you whine, clicking at the x in the corner of the new ad. when it opens three new tabs, all you can do is groan and close the laptop. you have an exam tomorrow, today is your first day of the period, which means tomorrow it's going to be worse, and to make things better, you are bombarded with photos of nude men and women, with attached locations, chat boxes and quotes. you feel sick.
yet again, you have just a little more of this lesson left, and if you could manage to spend so many hours fighting the virus bots, you can do it for ten more minutes. all out of motivation and will to live, you turn the laptop back on. the screen brightness almost blinds you, you forget how dark it has become and how bright your screen is. your eyes skim over the words, your brain so focused on focusing, that you forget to focus. you are frustrated, in pain, your hair is so greasy you could model it like clay, and your are nails half bitten off.
three minutes until your sleeping schedule starts, and five more long paragraphs to read. taking a deep breath, you click the arrow to scroll. as if the laptop is mocking you, it delivers you another message.
wooyoung (23), offers both mental and physical relief. check it out!
the ad flashes across the whole screen, the x not even visible on this one. you don't feel anything anymore. you've gone completely numb. accepted your fate. this will be your reminder to not study the last day ever again. you stare at the pink letters, then the picture on the side of it. it shows a young man, and oddly enough, not all oiled up and naked on it. it is a selfie, and in it he lays on the bed in the same position as you. how odd, to put a normal and clothed person on a sex ad.
"fuck it."
you drag the arrow over the highlighted letters, sighing. months, maybe even a whole year spent without a sexual contact. you didn't crave it. nothing in real life turned you on. maybe you didn't pay enough attention. maybe you've overgrown simple flirting and poor tries of having one night stands at parties. maybe all those young adult fantasy books on your shelves have raised your standards. looking back at the things that used to get you going makes you cringe. you've evolved from poorly acted out porn videos, to pages full of dark haired morally grey characters, blindfolds, leather gloves, candle wax, and whatnot.
you have yet to try out anything other than poor rubbings over the jeans you've received, not even orgasming. one night, three whole minutes of a drunk guy almost irritating your skin from harsh rubs, and a fake moan later, you start to wonder if you're the problem. proposing the idea of anything other than missionary and oral would make you the weird one, especially since you're a virgin. men here are shallow, and would rather jerk off to an amateur movie than try to match your standards and make the whole thing actually enjoyable.
the link you've clicked on doesn't open multiple tabs like the previous ones did. instead, it opens a single site, which first asks you to register and confirm your age. eager to see if the man in the picture was really the one offering such services, you log in with your google account, which unknowingly to you, used your picture and real name to set up the new account. your notes and pens are discarded on the floor, and your focus is on the man currently showing off his rings.
his hands are veiny, that is the first thing you notice. decorated with silver rings, nails neatly trimmed, with the pinky one painted black, and fingers oddly satisfying to look at. he brushes those same fingers through his hair, making it change colour for a split second. you notice that he is half blonde, which just makes you realize that sleep is not an option tonight. at least not yet.
"anyone want to open today's topic before i start?" he offers, scrolling through the comments.
you watch as people comment various topics and requests, the main one being for him to start touching himself already. for a sex cam, he does quite a lot of talking. maybe that's why you haven't left the site yet, but are staring at the way his teeth are biting his lip while his eyes focus on the bright screen.
"your friends are shaming you for having a threesome?" he reads out loud, then sighs. "they're probably virgins. or inexperienced girls who got fucked once then dumped. only they shame people for their sexual desires. they have no creativity at all. i can't imagine jerking off with just my hand anymore. feels bland. don't worry about them."
your fingers are quicker than your brain, and before you even register it, you hit send.
a soft laugh travels to your ears, and you just know it's because of your comment.
"you beg to differ?" he says, brushing his hair back again. he takes a moment to think. his rings shine under the dimmed lights, and you can't help but wonder how it would be to feel that cool sensation on your body.
you'd love to have him feel you up and down with this rings on, a cold contrast on your hot skin. you wouldn't budge if he were to put that hand against your neck, giving it light squeezes just enough to give you a thrill. you'd even let him do it in front of that camera of his, make all of these thirsty girls jealous because you're the one moaning his name. shit, you're really into him. or rather this whole situation. and he hasn't done a single sexual gesture.
"a virgin on my page. interesting." the young man hums, his eyebrows scrunched. "isn't life boring as a virgin? i mean, what do you do?"
i study, you're quick to reply again.
"i meant sexually, love." he laughs, somewhat fondly.
was it that obvious that you're a virgin? your cheeks feel hot, and you now wish to exit the page. but by doing that, you'll just prove him right. he'll make fun of you too, just like he did to those friends. you sigh. he doesn't know who you are, so it doesn't matter. you'll be honest, and maybe he'll give you a solution.
using hands isn't that boring
"ever tried a toy? or a person?"
tried a person. got disappointed.
"ah, what a shame. let me guess, gave you blisters from rubbing?"
oh just how did you know?
"poor thing," he coos, "if you had come to the right person, i would've given you just what you need."
the words come out raspy, and there's a sudden change on his face. you wonder if you said anything wrong. if he was thinking about banning you. but instead, a notification pops up in the corner of your screen.
wooyoung has sent you a message request!
oh.
oh.
"anyways, let's move on. am i in a hotel? ah, no. i recently moved houses, this will be my new filming room now. not as special as the previous one, but i need time to decorate it."
he keeps talking, eyes glancing at his phone every now and then, as if expecting you to answer right away. you are shaking, your head feels dizzy, and you find it hard to swallow. was he going to tell you privately to fuck off of his site? how embarrassing that would be. you wouldn't ever recover.
wooyoung has sent you a message request!
two of them now, yet you're still debating whether or not to exit and delete your browsing history. it won't hurt to look. you don't have to reply. you can just take a peek, leave him on read, and fuck out of there. it's not like he will see you on the street tomorrow. he could be on a whole different continent, and yet, he could be five houses away from you. either way, you're feeling vulnerable. those messages are either humiliation, or something entirely different. both of those make you feel uneasy.
then again, this is the only thing that sparked something inside you in these few months of feeling burnt out from reading all that erotica. the only difference is, this is happening. really happening. a whole man is in your chat, while he has an ongoing sex stream with more than five thousand people watching and commenting. and so when you say fuck it, you mean it.
wooyoung: ever tried an innocent soft little pillow?
wooyoung: guaranteed, feels better than a horny teenage boy.
your breathing is shallow, and you fear that you might collapse. his next message contains a phone number, and then, you watch him drop the phone on his bed. his focus is now on the camera, and the way his eyes stare into the lens, makes you feel as if they're searching for you. deciding to further test the waters, and see if he is just trying to have a little fun, or if he really has taken an ounce of interest in an inexperienced watcher, you send a text back.
he stops mid sentence, glancing at his phone. he fails to hide a smirk, and you're not sure whether it is the one of amusement or mocking.
am I, a boring old virgin, good enough for a pillow?
being a virgin doesn't mean you're all that innocent. quite the opposite, in your friend group, you are the one who leaves them all shocked when you speak of your desires. yet, who guarantees that this guy can accomplish what you want? they all want to "rock your world", show you how "good" it can be, until the make-out session is over and they come in their pants from simple dry humping. and you? who cares about if you came. your job is done the moment they come to their senses, and you are left to your growing disappointment in young men your age again.
wooyoung: does the boring old virgin know how to use one? perhaps some assistance is needed?
you swallow. you've never used anything other than your hand before. for someone with such a creative mind, you were quite a bore when it comes to pleasing yourself. you were used to your own touch, and you desperately needed someone else to fill the spot.
you glance at the screen. he is now holding something in his hand. it's clear, and long, and you're not sure if you've seen that before. your mind doesn't get enough time to form a thought, because he sticks two fingers in his mouth. he swirls the tongue around them, coating them until they're shimmering like the rings. sensually slow, he takes them out, making sure to give the camera a dreamy gaze. he turns the gadget towards the camera, and just when you figure out what it is, he brings his wet fingers to the hole in the toy. he circles the entrance, causing your tights to squeeze. you are so mesmerized by the way he slowly inserts his fingers into the toy, that you don't realize you are almost panting.
"need to prepare her for me." he says, giving it a few slow pumps.
you can almost feel his fingers on your cunt, he is just that good at this. each pump of his fingers sends a wave of butterflies straight to your abdomen. it's so painful, to be horny on your period. otherwise you would've came twice by now.
"think I've prepared her enough?"
comments are flooded with positive feedback, and the young man smirks. he readjusts the camera, and sits with his back against the bed frame. he wears short sweatpants, perfectly showing off his not so humble size. he takes his sweet time to undo the knot on them, driving the watchers (including you) insane. he laughs at the comments, and decides it's enough teasing.
"for all the virgins here tonight," he says, then glances at his phone.
finally, he pulls his sweats down. his cock find its place in his hand, not allowing you to take a better look. wooyoung gives himself a few slow strokes, head falling against the headboard as he does so. he hums, licking his fingers and pressing them against his cock. you have stopped breathing. his gaze is fixed on the lens, eyelids half closed, and breathing shallow. your eyes watch his movements, carefully documenting and engraving them in your brain so you can replay them for the next few weeks. he takes the toy, sliding it on his cock. your mouth drops when you see the absolute relief on his face, followed by an eyeroll and a deep moan. you figure that the toy serves him as a fake pussy. why a fake one, when he can have anyone he likes? his watchers must get jealous. you would be too, if you saw someone so hot that gives you such attention fuck someone else.
a few strokes in, and he is already bucking his hips upwards and moaning. wet noises travel to your ears, paired with multiple curses and sighs. suddenly, he sits up, grabbing two pillows from behind his back. he places a pillow on the mattress, the toy, then another pillow on top of all that. you almost gasp when you see him spit on his fingers, rubbing his cock, then slowly insert it into the toy. he grabs the pillows, then plunges his hips into it. he groans, and stays inside for a moment. then, he starts off with slow thrusts.
you've read so much about rough sex, that you didn't even think about the sensual side of it. how good it must be to savour every caress, every lick and every stroke. to actually take your time, like he is taking it with a simple toy. to be at his mercy for hours, what you'd give. helpless, deprived of senses, only him and you. you feel your heartbeat slow down as he stares into the lens, hips moving with such pace that has your stomach almost exploding.
overwhelmed by the situation unfolding in front of you, you shut your laptop down. you see your face on the black screen; cheeks puffed, pupils dilated, and mouth dry. fuck, what was that? did you just watch live porn? and did you interact with the person doing it? you check the time, and with a loud groan, you place the laptop on the floor and roll over. you have so little time to get some quality sleep, yet you're wide awake. your studying is nowhere near done, and you just know that a prayer won't save you tomorrow. from the exam, nor from the cramps.
surprisingly, you passed the exam. everything you've read last night managed to stick to your brain, despite the crazy situation that had interrupted you. you have already forgotten about it. when you woke up, it all seemed like a part of your dream. a very real dream. today, you didn't have time to think about it. your hair is a greasy mess, and an oversized hoodie hangs from your shoulders, covering your bloated stomach. you've dreamed about a cup of your favorite pink beverage all morning, and when the clock finally showed a sweet number four, you were the first one to run out of the building. your phone lays forgotten at the bottom of your backpack, mind too cluttered with the upcoming projects and cramps.
the coffee shop isn't as busy for a monday morning, and the timing is just right. you cannot stand anymore, so when you get next in line, you are relieved. you take a good look at the menu above the counter, happy that you've made it through such a tough morning.
"good day, how can i help you?"
your smile fades as quick as it arrives. you feel like all the blood in your body has pooled down in your feet, making it hard to move.
"oh, do you need to sit down? you look very..." the voice pauses, and you can feel an intense gaze on your face, before he continues "...pale."
you drop your gaze, slowly, feeling like the person is going to catch on if you do it in normal pace. right in front of you, stands the man who you watched fuck a pillow last night. he is very much real, not a fruit of your imagination combined with exhaust. he smiles sweetly, showing you towards a chair. you don't move. instead, you blink, and let your mouth run.
"i'll have the strawberry mocha please."
he scrunches his eyebrows, but begins to tap on his screen anyway.
"whipp-?"
"with whipped cream, thanks. just, uh, extra syrup. and pearl sprinkles."
he raises an eyebrow, looking at you suspiciously. you can't tell if it's because of your relation to his odd interaction last night, or simply because you are acting weird.
"that'll be-"
you interrupt again, pressing your credit card to the gadget near the cash register, eyes not leaving the wooden surface. with behaviour like this, he will soon figure out why you are acting this way. you must stop, before you embarrass yourself more.
"name?"
"anna," you blurt out, just in case.
"right," you think you hear him scoff, and if it weren't for your brain slowing down with each second, you would've asked what's so funny.
once he types in everything he needs, he points towards an empty section, gesturing you to take a seat. sitting on that chair has never been more uncomfortable for you. you feel like you sat on thorns, and no matter how you adjust, you are just making annoying creaking noises.
you glance at the man behind the counter. a lump forms in your throat as your eyes scan his hand movements. he is invested in the shaker, fingers skillfully moving it in the air. your concentration gets stolen by his face, loose strands falling on it eyes focused on the drink, and eyebrows scrunched. even if he was a aware of you staring, (you doubt he didn't notice), he doesn't spare you a glance. he pours the drink into the iced cup, spilling a little on his fingers and on the counter. you follow his hand, which takes a straw and drops it into the cup, and then moves towards his mouth. your breath stops in your throat, and your eyes almost drop on the floor.
he sticks the two wet fingers in his mouth, slowly, and looks up right at you. he catches you red handed, or better said, red cheeked. you're flustered by his hot, unprofessional, but hot move. and as if that wasn't enough, he has the audacity to maintain eyecontact as he brings you your beverage, a slight smirk dancing on his lips.
"your drink, anna."
"thank you, woo-" you freeze.
idiot. fucking idiot.
"ah, you managed to read my name tag."
he saves you, perhaps unknowingly. the amount of attention that his hands are gaining from you should be concerning, yet you still can't stop admiring those strangely attractive veins peeking from under his rolled up sleeve, going all the way to the fingers which are fixing the name tag.
"wooyoung, your shift ended ten minutes ago!" the voice behind the counter calls.
"oops." he snickers, then makes his way towards the counter, allowing you to take a look at his back too.
the thin white shirt is a little tight on his body, just enough to show off quite a few lines on his back. funnily enough, even though you've seen him naked, something about those clothes giving you a teaser is much more of a button pusher for you. the anticipation and buildup were always more interesting to you than the actual thing they lead to.
you laugh at yourself. as if any of that is going to happen to you any time soon. deciding you've spent enough time out of your comfy apartment today, you decide to put a lid on your coffee and leave the shop. at the door, someone tries to get out before you, but once they realize it's a bit tight for both, two hands gently find their way on your waist. a strong scent of jasmine washes over your senses, warm and firm body pressed against your back.
"oh, watch it, love."
and with that, you stand on the entrance, watching the familiar man run off to his car, the barista apron resting over his shoulder.
wooyoung: disconnected mid show?
wooyoung: was it too overwhelming for your first time?
wooyoung: shame, i put my all into that orgasm, only to see you disconnected long ago
you are rolling in your bed, listening to the messages that are being read out loud by your very best friend. disbelief evident in his voice, he reads, over and over. you haven't yet replied, and having an actual encounter with him today didn't make it easier for you to do so.
"he's, like, a hundred percent real?"
"he very much is."
"are you sure? because ai is getting very scary these days-"
"yunho." you sit up, face inches away from him. "i stood this close to him."
the tips of his ears turn red, and you manage to catch a single glance he sends towards your lips. you ignore it, trying to convince yourself that if you do not notice, it will not happen. his behaviour will stop.
"he is very much real."
"o-okay," he stutters, turning his head sideways as to avoid being caught staring again, "so what now?"
"i don't know. what is there to do? he's just some porn guy, and i was just an accidental watcher. nothing is going to happen."
"and-"
your phone pings, as if knowing what yunho was about to ask.
"-the messages?"
"i'll just..." you stall, glancing at the phone and trying to see the notification, "...delete it all."
the man in front of you scoffs, believing in your words as much as you. he gets off your bed, picking up his jacket along the way.
"i'll see you in class tomorrow."
you only nod, feeling guilt pooling up at the bottom of your stomach. yet, as soon as you hear the door shut, you grab your phone. indeed, messages from wooyoung are taking up your phone screen.
wooyoung: out of curiosity, you didn't happen to try the pillow thing?
wooyoung: need to borrow mine?
you bite your lip, and your eyes fall on the pile of pillows yunho used to make himself comfortable.
i haven't tried it. and no, i have four of them.
wooyoung: shame. bet they'd love to be suffocated between your legs.
you choke on your spit, eyes skimming over the message multiple times.
that one of your fetishes? being suffocated with female tights?
wooyoung: you have no idea.
a few minutes pass,and you are thinking of various replies to send to him. do you keep talking to him? do you start flirting? is this considered flirting? if yes, are you doing a good job? a few more minutes pass before your phone dings again, wooyoung interrupting your thinking process.
wooyoung: well, i see that you're extremely disinterested in my tries of communication, so i shall just leave you be. hope my actions and i weren't overwhelming for you. if that's the case, my sincere apologies. you're always welcome to my lives though.
wooyoung: oh, and good luck studying!
"no, no," you whisper, seeing the online tag under his name disappear. your lack of communication with actual confident men and your awkwardness in general made him back off. it all felt too real to be true, but it was real. and you let it slip away. your only chance at gaining experience and living out your fantasies.
i'm not disinterested!
shit, you shouldn't have sent that exclamation mark. he will think you are desperate now. he doesn't reply, nor does the tag under his name reappear. you wait, minutes, half an hour, just rolling on the bed and switching between apps, trying to see if he at least went online. maybe he only read it from his notifications, and that wasn't enough to make him come back. you pick up the last few ounces of desperation you have left, and grab a pillow. you sit on it, crushing it between your legs, and pull your oversized hoodie just enough to cover your bottom and expose your thighs. you have discarded the pants the moment you entered the house, already used to walking around in yunho's old comfy boxers. you snap a picture, once, then twice, until you are satisfied with the angle and all the details that he may not even notice; like your chipped nail polish or the messy notes from yunho's studying.
instantly, wooyoung comes back online. he begins typing, then stops. he types again, and stops once more. you are biting your nails, regretting already. now that he knows how desperate you are, he will lose interest in you. you would too if you were him. you zoom into the picture, trying to figure out if anything is wrong with it.
wooyoung saved the picture in the chat!
oh.
wooyoung: fuck, that's
wooyoung: wow
wooyoung: those are the smoothest and softest thighs i've ever seen in my life
wooyoung: you know when you look at something and you know the texture of it? i bet i could just sink between them just like that pillow
wooyoung: could you ride that for me, angel?
the nickname sends arrows to your core, and you gulp. he knows his way with words, and you are so here for it. you can feel yourself dripping, and not from what you're supposed to drip from. your horny levels hit the sky on your period, and oh, how convenient that all of this is happening on the second day of it. he doesn't have to know, you could keep him hooked, until your period is done. but then what? what guarantees that he will not lose interest once he has a little fun with you with all the dirty talk?
your hands work against your brain, and soon enough, you are grinding on the soft material, one hand holding the phone and the other one covering your mouth so that no noises come out of it. if it feels good with so many layers on you, how good can it feel with your bare clit rubbing against it?
wooyoung: atta girl
wooyoung: feel good?
you only moan at the praise he delivers you, hips speeding up the pace.
yes, you manage to quickly type in.
wooyoung: can you type and work it? is it hard for my good girl to multitask?
you set the phone aside, focusing entirely on the object between your legs. you roll your hips, dedicated to chasing the sweet pleasure that has abandoned you for so long. at the memory of his skilled hips last night, the orgasm washes over you so quickly. his choice of words significantly sped up the process, and you aren't to complain. you take your time to calm your breathing, before taking the phone in your hands again. it was new, and different, but most importantly, fucking good.
the euphoria doesn't last long, the look of horror replacing the one of pure bliss on your face. right under wooyoung's message stood yours.
voice message sent.
it is you shamelessly whimpering and grunting, mere four seconds of it, yet enough to make wooyoung save it in the chat.
wooyoung: is it christmas already?
wooyoung: i keep getting present after present. what did i do to deserve it?
wooyoung: i better go fix the problem you've created.
wooyoung has sent a picture! tap to view.
the picture is dark, but there is just enough lighting for you to see his defined v-line and the bulge in his sweatpants. you bite the inside of your cheek, suppressing a smile. you made someone horny. not just anyone, but wooyoung, a porn creator. he has surely seen lots of things, how come a fully clothed picture and a four second audio could get him in the mood?
you have saved the picture in the chat!
in the next few days, you ask yunho to pick up the beverage from the coffee shop while you grab something to eat. he is happy that you started including breakfast in your day, and isn't yet aware that you are only avoiding the man he also knew about. perhaps wooyoung worked different shifts, and they didn't have an encounter yet? it's a bit cruel towards yunho, but you can't make yourself go in there. not until you've grown some dignity.
today, yunho isn't here. he has only answered to your message, saying that he has a flu, and that he will be resting for a day or two. which leaves you to getting the coffee on your own. you run from the rain, your umbrella broken and swimming away somewhere down the road. you would've picked it up and threw it away, really, if that lighting wasn't so close to you and you started running for your life. you are soaked, the hoodie stuck to your skin and the shorts uncomfortable and heavy. you hurriedly enter the coffee shop and exhale, the warmth of the place caressing your cold cheeks. you notice the place is empty, and the chairs are neatly tucked under the tables. the surfaces have been freshly wiped, and no menus or decorations were on them.
you approach the counter, ready to grab your beverage and leave before you make a bigger mess. nobody is there, the syrups and coffee cans are neatly placed on the shelves, not a drop of water visible on the counters. your eyes notice a little board, with pink letters on it.
due to sudden illness of two out of three workers, we are forced to work short hours this week. thank you for understanding!
underneath, you see that they work until four in the afternoon. you check the time, and upon noticing that it is just two minutes before four, you sigh. you turn around, ready to leave and rid the poor worker of trouble after they already prepared the place for closing.
"oh, i'm terribly sorry, i didn't notice you!"
the voice makes your blood run cold, and once again, you find yourself frozen in spot. only this time, you are all alone with him. no people surrounding you. just him, you, and the crazy weather outside.
"please, feel free to order. you have a minute and a half to place it!"
you turn around, eyes locking with brown ones. he is smiling sweetly, pointing towards the menu above his head.
"i don't want to bother you. you've cleaned the whole place and-" your eyes drop on the see through shirt hugging his body "-you've already taken your apron off."
"luckily, my boss is sick too so she can't give me crap about it. i can make your drink without it."
you make your way towards the counter again, eyes skimming over the menu, knowing damn well what you're going to order. you just have to buy yourself time so you can calm down. the scent of jasmine is taking over your senses, creeping into your mind and bringing back memories you wish so hard to forget so you can move on with your life. he is tugging you into the void, and you have nothing to get you out of there. you haven't heard from him since the day you rode the pillow for him, and you didn't have time to watch any of his lives.
"well, then. i'll have a strawberry mocha."
"ah, so it's your usual then."
"yes. extra syrup. and the pearl sprinkles, please."
"and whipped cream, yes", he types in the order, then looks behind. "you know, we have some strawberry cupcakes that didn't sell today due to the weather. would you like one? on the house!"
you hesitate, not wanting to waste his time. he could be home by now, doing something important. like filming himself. or texting you after you've left him on seen. or better said, saved.
"i really don't want to waste your time."
"you're not wasting my time, trust me. besides, i'd rather stay here a little more until my phone finishes charging. i don't want to get stuck in that weather outside with no battery."
he sees you hesitate and eye up the pink pastries, desire obvious in your eyes. he chuckles, then brings the whole tray on the counter.
"tell you what," he grabs the items needed for your beverage, not breaking eye contact with you, "i'll make us two strawberry mochas, and we'll eat those cupcakes so they don't get wasted until the weather calms down. sound good?"
you gulp. the look on your face is a complete opposite of him, as well as your body language. he is relaxed, beaming with confidence, and has a smile on his lips. meanwhile, you are stiff, your face is blank, maybe even scared at the fact that you're gonna be alone with the man who made you cum without touching you. but when thunder echoes through the place, you agree.
it doesn't take him long to make them and bring them to your booth in the corner of the shop. the smell of strawberries is the only thing keeping you sane at the moment. he sits across from you, shirt half unbuttoned, as if it's the warmest day of the spring outside. he doesn't have a care in the world. he silently enjoys the cupcake, occasionally glancing at you. you are slow with yours, careful not to stain your clothes with the pink icing.
"want to try?"
you look over at him. he brings his glass closer towards you, and aligns the straw with your lips.
"isn't it the same?"
"well, no." he laughs awkwardly. "try it, trust me."
you try taking the glass from him, but he is persistent in holding it for you. you wrap your lips around the straw, eyes locked with his dark ones.
"atta girl." he hums.
you swear you could orgasm right there on the spot. you pull at the liquid, cheeks hollowing and creating a perfect scene for him. he is dead serious, the smirks and chuckles long left behind the counter. the moment your tongue tastes alcohol, you push the drink away from you, creamy liquid dripping from your lips.
"fuck, is that whiskey?"
you wipe your top off with your sleeve, not yet realizing wooyoung's intense gaze on your lips.
"yes." he replies, as if it's the most normal thing in the world.
"god, why?" you finally lick the cream off your lips, ridding wooyoung of more fantasies forming in his head.
"it's good. why, don't like alcohol?"
you never really did. sure, you drank some tequilas, and a little gin of course, but not to the point to get drunk or actually go for a full round or two.
"i'm actually quite a virgin when it comes to alcohol."
the words are left hanging in the air, silence wrapping you both up. one might think that you knew exactly what you were doing with the choice of words, but you were plain dense. and wooyoung was here for it. he was whipped for all the innocent sides you were unknowingly showing him, but lord forbid he tells you anything. otherwise, you might stop talking at all.
"you can come over for classes if you want..." he brings the glass back in front of him, a smirk dancing on his lips, "...anna."
"yeah, i don't want any alcohol after my real classes, thank you."
the conversation stops, the only sound being quiet chewing and the rain pouring. wooyoung takes his time to think, and so do you.
"that yunho guy-"
"what do you do in your free time-"
you start at the same time. yunho? how does he know his name?
"you go first," you offer, unwrapping another cupcake.
"that yunho guy, he orders a single strawberry mocha with extra syrup and pearl sprinkles every day when you don't come. whipped cream too, of course. for you, assuming?"
you nod, poking those same sprinkles with your straw. yunho has been a little more absent in your life since this whole thing has started, and you feel bad to admit that you didn't really miss him. you weren't using him for coffee or homework, of course. you still like to occasionally chat with him, just not like before. especially since his feelings are coming more to the surface.
"yes, for me."
wooyoung hums, not asking further questions.
"so uh, wooyoung, right? you're new here?" you opt for a different question, seeing that he didn't remind you to finish the previous one.
"jung wooyoung, yes. i moved from los angeles recently, didn't find my luck there."
"ah, what do you do?"
"porn."
and just like that, the conversation stops. at least from your side. your head hangs low over your paper cup, fingers now playing with the cupcake wrap as you feel his gaze on you.
"are we going to act like you don't know what that is?"
"i know what it is," you stutter, fingers ripping the wrap apart and playing with bits from nervousness, "i just don't quite, you know, fit in that area."
"you sure fit in that night."
you choke on your spit, eyes shooting up to look at him. his elbow rests on the desk, supporting his head, while his other one plays with the empty cup. his finger grazes the corners, slowly circling it, as if trying to help you remember that night and the way the did it to the toy. your mouth goes dry, and you feel at his complete mercy.
"how-" you clear your throat, the roughness of it a dead giveaway that he caught you, "-how did you, uh, know?"
"you're telling me you saw nothing wrong with entering the coffee shop with that hoodie on, knowing full well i work here?"
you look down at the hoodie you're wearing. how fucking ironic, that it's the same hoodie you posed in for him. you really are that dense.
"i should get going."
"i can drive you home. you're not thinking of walking in this weather?"
him and you? in such a small space? for such a long time? what if you blurt out more stupid things, as if you haven't embarrassed yourself enough today? you wouldn't blame him if he left you on the side of the road.
the train of thoughts is interrupted by your name rolling off his lips so sweetly, dripping milk and honey. your actual name, not the fake one you gave him.
"yes?"
"i'm not camboy wooyoung now. i'm just wooyoung, your friendly barista. and when i say i can and want to drive you home, i mean it. no funny business. the last thing i want to do is make a loyal costumer uncomfortable."
it doesn't take long for him to clean up the table and grab his phone from the charging station. you patiently wait by the door, ears and cheeks warm from the unfamiliar situation you've found yourself in. you follow his commands, such as coming behind the counter and slipping through the staff door so that the cameras don't catch you. you squeeze into the pantry, waiting for him to lock the doors one by one.
"so, that yunho guy didn't take your virginity yet?" he blurts out, as if it is the most normal question he could ask.
"what?"
"well," he turns around, facing you, "he is your boyfriend after all, isn't he?"
"that's not quite- oh-" you are pressed into the corner, with wooyoung blocking the way out. he puts his hands on the wall, trapping you between his arms and forcing you to look at him.
"does your boyfriend know that you watch filth and film yourself for another man?"
"he isn't-"
"does he know that his innocent little girlfriend is alone with that same man inside an empty coffee shop, away from everyone?"
you fail to answer, instead opting for silence. your eyes fall on his exposed chest, fingers yearning to touch. you feel a hand under your chin, gently lifting your head up so that you can look at him again. you see pure desire in his eyes, and now you know exactly what the authors mean when they say that his eyes darkened with lust. you are witnessing it first hand, and now that you are finally here, you are not acting the way you did in your mind.
he brings his face close to yours, his loose hair strands tickling your cheeks. his breathing is shallow, much like yours, and when he slowly presses his lips against yours, you breathing stops completely. he holds your chin in his hand, thumb gently rubbing your cheek, while his other hand finds its place on your hip. he pulls your body into his, and ever so gently bites down on your bottom lip.
your first normal kiss ever. with the man you watched masturbate on a crucial studying night. he pulls away, just enough to move your hair out of the way.
"am i making you uncomfortable?" he asks, concern taking over his features.
"no," you whisper, not trusting your voice.
"you sure?"
"please keep kissing me." you look up at him, and wooyoung swears that he has never seen such big pleading eyes in his entire life. just how can he deny you such a thing, when you asked him so sweetly and innocently?
wooyoung loses control, and lets his heart take over. his hands grab your waist, picking you up and seating you on a nearby surface, knocking some cups and cutlery over in the process. his lips are pressed against yours again, moving slowly until you get used to it. your hands hesitantly wrap around his neck, fingers playing with the hair on it. wooyoung exhales into your lips, absolutely whipped for your little gestures.
you are soaking wet. you hope he doesn't feel it, considering he has your legs wrapped around his waist and your cunt pressed against his firm torso. with each kiss he so generously delivers you, a new batch of butterflies gets released in your stomach, making you feel all giggly and excited. he smells absolutely heavenly, and the way his tongue is grazing your lips is driving you mad. his fingers press into your thigh, feeling the flesh and lightly squeezing it. so he really does have a thigh fetish.
you whine when he pulls away from you, only to attach his lips to your neck. he drags his tongue down the side of your neck, to your collarbone. his hands sneak under your hoodie, lingering on your bare skin for a moment. you realize he is waiting for a sign to keep going, so you help him raise your hoodie right under your chest.
"should i stop?"
you didn't quite picture him as a man who would ask for consent multiple times. but then again, he is a man. not a boy. and just like he said: right now, he isn't camboy wooyoung. he is your friendly barista wooyoung. a particularly touchy friendly barista wooyoung. not that you're complaining.
"angel?"
absolutely lost in the way he is looking at you, you fail to answer. you feel so small in his arms, and so inexperienced when it comes to simple kissing. god, what if he wants something more right away?
"i need to know you're comfortable. i won't do anything if-"
you stop him by taking his hand and placing it on your breast. he gulps, gently squeezing the soft flesh. why does he seem so nervous? doesn't he fuck multiple people in a span of a month?
he rubs your tense buds, sending little shockwaves to your core. as soon as you lift the hoodie to your collarbones, wooyoung is quick to take your bud into his mouth. he teases with the tip of his tongue, making you twitch and yelp in his grip. you aren't used to this type of pleasure. it's new, and intensive. you love it.
his other hand keeps up the pace his tongue has set, rubbing slow circles on the sensitive buds. you struggle with breathing, and your hands are reaching out to grab anything; the counter, his shoulders, his hair, the counter again, and so on. your head falls back, and the feeling of pure bliss pools in your stomach. you feel like you could orgasm any moment, yet it never happens. wooyoung switches between each bud, treating them both equally. a particularly breathy moan leaves your mouth, making wooyoung hum. he is pleased with the way you're responding to him, so jumpy and whiny while he feasts on your body.
when he pulls away, you see a string of saliva connecting his lips with your breast. you moan at the sight, feeling adrenaline running through your veins and waiting to explode somewhere in your body. wooyoung drops down on his knees, fingers hooked in the elastic band of your shorts.
"if i don't get crushed between your thighs right now, i don't think i'll live to see another day."
even from that position, he is emitting insane dominant energy, and you are just a marionette in his hands.
"please."
you raise your hips just enough to help him pull the shorts down, along with the panties. you are thankful that they are the new ones you had discovered this morning since buying them a month ago. though, they were ruined with your arousal anyway and wooyoung probably couldn't care less. but instead of tossing them aside, he raises them in front of his eyes, admiring them.
"that's so fucking adorable."
they are plain pastel panties, with a small row of lace on the top of it. you figure he is used to strings and thongs, and how new a normal set of panties must seem to him. wooyoung folds the panties, and stuffs them in his pocket. too taken aback by his action, you do not have time to react when he places your legs over his shoulders.
"you don't have to cum. i just want to show you how good it can be."
you mean you want to leave me yearning for your touch as if i am not desperate enough?
"is that alright? can i lick you until you pass out?"
he knows exactly which words drive you insane. as if he was living in your head since you discovered the first young adult fantasy book. you nod, then breathe in. the sudden lighting outside makes you aware of where you are. you are about to have your cunt devoured by none other than the new barista everyone around you is crushing on, in one of the staff rooms. soft café music is heard in the distance now that the rain has calmed down, and it is only adding up to the rather odd, but once in a lifetime situation you are in.
a flat, wet muscle presses against your folds, softly licking up your arousal and stopping at your clit. you try to close your legs at the new feeling of pleasure, but wooyoung is quick to grab your thighs and keep them apart just enough so he can get you used to the feeling. your legs shake as the tip of his tongue massages the tip of your clit, pure pleasure taking over your body and completely shutting your brain off. you are a whining mess, shaking in his arms, pulling at his hair, and whatnot. his eyes never leave your face, memorizing every eyebrow scrunch, every eyeroll, every moan and every hand movement. he is entirely mesmerized by your existence. he has never seen anyone let their guard down like this and put themselves at his complete mercy.
he switches between techniques, not yet allowing you to work up your orgasm. he figures you like circles with the tip of his tongue best, they have you being more vocal and squirmy in his hold. wooyoung then snakes his hands under your bottom, gently lifting your lower body so that your head and shoulders lay comfortably on the wooden surface. your hips are in the air, and your legs hang off his shoulders. you are confused by the position he has you in, until he dives into your cunt once more. you moan, fingers reaching to pull at his soft hair. this time he doesn't separate your thighs, but instead presses his face further into your arousal and squishes your flesh against his cheeks, licking every drop you have to offer him.
"wooyoung-" you whine, hips subconsciously grinding against his face.
"good, good girl." he hums, lips closing around your bud and sucking on it.
you clench, body tensing up upon feeling the orgasm approaching.
"fuck- fuck-" you whine, hands gripping the shelves above your head.
wooyoung slows his movements to the max, carefully sliding his tongue up and down your clit, driving you insane with the orgasm delay. you want to cum so bad, but everything feels too much, you are sweating so bad, and the position you are in is making you more vulnerable and sensitive.
"please, please, please, pretty please" you beg, voice already betraying you and cracking at the end.
wooyoung groans against your cunt, then moves away. you gasp with surprise. all the pleasure leaves your body, and you are now laying on the surface again. you support yourself on your elbows, enough to look at him and ask just why he stopped.
"prettiest cunt i've ever seen in my life." he caresses your skin above it.
"why-" you breathe out, "- why did you stop? i was so, so close-"
"i had to, angel. i don't want you cumming in a pantry on an uncomfortable surface."
you watch him lick his lips, disbelief evident on your face. he chuckles, picking your shorts up from the floor.
"panties?"
"i'll get you new ones."
were the panties really that interesting to him? wooyoung reaches for something above your head, pressing his lips on your forehead before grabbing paper towels. you are sensitive to his touch, feeling overstimulated and irritated even though you didn't orgasm. he patiently wipes you, then pulls your shorts up, not forgetting to caress your thighs along the way.
"come here." he instructs.
you sit up, feet swinging from the counter. the man in front of you pulls you in for a kiss, this time a short one.
"you did very good. i hope you get your real orgasm somewhere comfy."
he hopes? was this a farewell? he had his little fun with you, and now he is no longer interested?
"come on, the weather is calmer now. i'll still drive you home though."
and just like that, he proceeds outside, leaving you with thoughts for a few moments. you feel a little humiliated, and very vulnerable and exposed. still, you follow him outside, and get into his car. it is a neat car, that you notice. it smells like an ocean breeze, and he has a camera above his steering wheel.
"not for porn," he interrupts your thoughs.
you have forgotten about that side of him. in the moment, it seemed like he was just a normal guy who hooked up with you because he thinks you are cute. in reality, he is probably bored of all those skilled partners and wants something new, so he used you as a little project. you feel hurt, tears gathering in the corner of your eyes as you look out the window. you haven't spared him a single glance, scared that he might be pitiful towards you. that's the last thing you need.
"right, then left?" he asks, steering the wheel with one hand.
"yeah."
it doesn't take long before the car stops in front of a familiar building. you don't see yunho's car, and just then remember that he is sick and resting at home. wooyoung has clouded your mind so much that you don't have any other thoughts, only ones about him.
"thank you for sharing the cupcakes with me." he winks, then unlocks the door.
you aren't ready to say goodbye just yet. if you leave the car, will everything be back the way it was? him acting like he doesn't know you, and vice versa? are you supposed to go in there and order your strawberry mocha from him like it doesn't associate you with today's event?
"wooyoung?"
"yes, angel?"
you play with your fingers in your lap, deciding which words would be the best to make him stay in your life just a little longer.
"can you teach me?"
"teach you?"
"yes. you are so experienced, and i am just a dumb virgin with a big imagination."
he stops to think. he bites the inside of his cheek, and you mimic him.
"i'd destroy you."
you clench around nothing, hearing his raspy voice say such words to you. you know he means them, you saw him mean them. but you are up for it. anything, just to get another taste of him.
"i don't mind."
he sighs, smile still dancing on his lips. "just what are you?"
since the day you had your first orgasm denial, you have heard from him only once, and only because you sent the message first.
i'm not seeing those panties again, right?
wooyoung: nope.
okay
okay? okay??? you could at least put some effort into flirting. you are only pushing him away, instead of inching towards another meeting, this one preferably ending with an orgasm. the notifications about his lives were now regulars on your phone screen, and though you never quite watched them, you like to think he does it for you. slight jealousy has appeared, and you have to stop it before it spreads. but after all, you are the one that has gained his attention.
you decide to visit yunho. he has been sick for quite some time, and has been rarely answering your messages. you have prepared him his favourite soup, and bought his favorite chocolate bar.
"yunnie, you're alive!"
you jump into his arms, forgetting that he might still be weak from being sick. but he catches you effortlessly, a fond smile on his lips as he keeps your body close to him.
"feeling better?"
"almost." he replies, gently setting you down on the floor. "how have you been?"
"bored, honestly. i miss gossiping with you and getting yelled at by other students. oh, turns out mark did cheat on jenna!"
"knew it."
yunho makes his way to the kitchen to grab you a drink and put away the food you brought him, and you can't help but notice how buff he has gotten since the last time you saw him. he was probably well built before too, but you've never seen that man in anything other than oversized t-shirts and hoodies. right now, he is wearing one of those compressive exercise sleeveless tops, every bump and curve visible on his toned body. you notice how big his arms are, and just how tall he is.
you feel familiar warmth between your legs, and you have to sit down to stop any funny business. he is speaking, but all you can do is stare at the way his hands are handling the drinks. his hands are much bigger in comparison to wooyoung, and his physique overall is making you melt right there on his couch.
"so? sound good?"
you look up, pupils dilated and cheeks warm and red. he is confused by your sudden change in expression, before he realizes that you weren't even listening. he sighs, giving up on the weekend trip proposal.
"what is it with you?" the man hands you a glass of apple juice, along with a granola bar he knows you love to steal from his cupboard.
"nothing, why?" you reply too quickly.
he laughs, mixed confusion and amusement. he sits next to you, leaving a little space in between. the way he drops his head back on the backrest and manspreads isn't helping your situation. wooyoung has opened a door that cannot be closed anymore.
fuck, wooyoung.
"you know, i thought i was gonna die. my headache was so bad i heard thumping inside it."
"does it hurt now?"
"not really, no. but i do think i still have a little fever. can you check?"
you lean over on your knees, fingers gently moving his hair out of the way. upon reaching over for the thermometer from the coffee table, you slip between the couch cushions, making yunho jolt and grab your waist. you have to close your eyes for a moment, sensory overload getting the worst of you. your clothes suddenly feel so tight and itchy, his breathing is loud and right there in your ears, and his hands are burning on your skin over the fabric of your top.
"watch it, little one," he says.
you know he means the nickname as a sign of fondness towards you, but in the situation where you're acting like an animal in heat, it is doing wonders to you. knowing that he is big, much bigger than you, and calling you that is making your stomach boil.
you want to make a move. no matter how wrong it would be. you want to lean in and kiss him, make him feel you up and down, make him touch you right here on the couch, where you cuddled and watched movies since knowing each other.
"why are you looking at me like that?" his voice is suddenly raspy.
"like what?" you whisper, afraid of your infamous cracking tone.
"like you want to fuck me."
not far from truth. not exactly fuck, rather just have a little fun to get some heat out of you. his hands never leave your waist, instead pulling your body into his lap. you've been in this position many times, mainly being tickled and begging for mercy. now? you're ready to beg for his tongue on you.
"i-"
a familiar ringtone interrupts you, and you feel him tense up underneath.
"pick it up." he says, lazily looking at you through half closed eyelids.
"uh, yes," you stutter, reaching towards the table to grab your phone.
you almost faint seeing the name on your screen. you don't want to pick up. not now. any other time, yes. but right now? not quite convenient.
"go on, answer it." yunho encourages, not knowing the consequences of his action.
but you do it anyway. what is there to lose? lose yunho, gain wooyoung. and vice versa. how fucking evil of you. acting like a bitch in heat, listening to your pussy instead of your morals.
"yes?" you answer, breath hitching when yunho starts caressing your sides.
"hi, angel."
yunho's touching stops. he is now focused on the male voice coming from your phone, the name of the contact not visible from your hair.
"let me see you tonight? i'll take you out for a ride and a dinner."
"tonight?"
"yes. unless you have plans? i just got my motorcycle back from the auto mechanic, thought i'd show you there's thrilling stuff other than an orgasm denial in a public space."
yunho removes his hands completely from you, but lets you sit on his lap. you witness his face morph from flirty to mixed anger and disappointment, though he is trying very hard to hide it. the red tips of his ears are a dead giveaway, and you wish you could feel guilty.
"i have no plans. the ride sounds nice."
"good girl. i'll pick you up same place i dropped you off the other day, six o'clock?"
"sound good."
"good. i'll see you in around two hours then?"
"yes."
"chatty as usual, i see. i'll get you to talk tonight, no worries."
and with that, he hangs up. it is only then that yunho sits you on the couch next to him, while he stands up. you are numb to his reaction, excitement boiling in your veins in anticipation for tonight.
"do you enjoy hurting me?"
he shoots the first arrow through your heart.
"do you love seeing me suffer? do you enjoy bringing me to tears almost every time we meet?"
you have just uncovered something that has been cooking for a long time, and you know you are at fault. you just fail to feel wrong for it.
"it was fine at the beginning, you showed no signs of interest whatsoever. but now? the last month or two? you are driving me fucking insane."
when yunho starts swearing, you now it is bad.
"and to think that i'd actually have a chance. that you'd open yourself up for me so i can prove to you how well i can treat you. i deserve a global idiot award."
you don't speak. you let him rant, knowing that he would only get worked up more if you spoke. none of the things you had to say were comforting, so being silent was the better option.
"get the fuck out of my house."
it is the first time you see him so angry and aggressive. with full right. so you silently take your belongings, turning your back on him without a proper goodbye.
"and take this with you. i don't need anything from you." he shoves the box you had brought him into your hands.
he looks at you, teary eyed, fighting hard to keep them from spilling. you've never seen yunho cry. ever. of joy? yes. but almost shaking while holding back tears and biting his lips to keep them from quivering? perhaps it's just anger and frustration. either way, you fucked him up. and there's nothing you can do, other than leave him be.
"i hate you."
six o'clock rolls around quite quickly. you stand in front of a motorcycle, quite bigger than you imagined. wooyoung takes his helmet off, then steps off the motorcycle. he examines you, from head to toe, a little puzzled.
"skirt? odd choice, considering that i told you we were using a motorcycle."
wooyoung then pushes your hair back, removing it from your face and letting it fall on your back. he puts the helmet on you, a slight smile on his lips as he secures it.
"you're so fucking cute it hurts. look at you in your skirt and ballerinas."
your cheeks burn from his compliments, your thighs rubbing under the delicate material. wooyoung plays with the ends of the skirt, then slips his hands on your bare skin.
"want to sit at front?" he purrs, gaze gentle and lips turned into a fond smile.
"i actually never... well, this is my first time seeing it up so close."
"so i'm your first motorcycle too? i feel honoured."
"I don't really know how to... you know, anything."
whenever you're around him, your vocabulary becomes very limited and poor. for someone who reads so much, you're struggling quite good with putting together simple sentences.
"your only job is to sit still and be pretty for me. got it?" he cups your face with one hand and gently caresses your jaw with his thumb.
you nod, not trusting yourself with speaking while he touches you in such ways.
"come on now. hop on."
you are sat in front of him, hands trapped under his while gripping the handles. you are stiff, and even if he notices, he doesn't react. he starts off slow, enough to not scare you off immediately. at one point, right at the last traffic light before exiting the city centre, he speeds up, the front of the motorcycle hanging in the air for a split second, but enough to make you gasp and fall back against his chest. you hear him chuckle near your helmet, his hand coming to rest on your hip enough to comfort you.
"i got you," he says, squeezing your hip.
you now lay comfortably against him, enjoying the smooth ride on the highway. you are alone on the road, the opposite direction crowded due to people returning home from work. you haven't felt such thrill ever. the way wooyoung controls the vehicle and smoothly changes lanes, to the way he speeds up and does the wheelie again, this time a little higher, is making you see stars. you scream, but the playful way. adrenaline rushes through your veins, and you are laughing, having the most fun of your life. he isn't saying much, and even if he was, you don't hear him. you feel comfortable in his embrace, trusting him with your life on this silent road lit by neon lights on the fences.
you gasp when you feel his cold fingers on your thigh, the texture odd. you look down, only to see that his other hand has a leather glove on, and is slowly dipping between your legs. he slows down, enough to pay more attention to you without any danger nearby. the cold leather touches your folds near your panties that have slightly moved from the reckless driving. he realises the advantage, and proceeds to rip apart the fabric. you moan at the action, remembering all those worn out pages of your books describing men ripping women's bras and panties. and now, you're a character in that page, hopefully about to have an orgasm of your lifetime.
the cold leather touches you once again, a single finger toying with your soft bud, just enough to have you panting. your head falls on his shoulder, searching for support. he circles your clit, playing with the soft flesh and checking just how wet you are getting.
"want me to stop?" he asks, and when you shake your head, he dips his fingers below your clit.
you flinch at the unfamiliar feeling, not feeling the pleasure anymore. he notices, but tries to enter once again, this time more gentle and slow. you flinch again, your head no longer resting on his shoulder. he removes his hand, gripping the handle again as he slows the vehicle. he stops at the nearby platform, the neon fence lights shining on the stone table and two benches. he gets off the motorcycle, then helps you off too. your ripped panties hit the floor, your folds caressed by the highway breeze. he takes his helmet off, hanging it on one of the handles, then helps you with yours.
you are suddenly hyperaware of the situation you are in. far from the city and people, alone in the dark with still a complete stranger, with nothing but a top and a skirt on. nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. nobody to call.
"shit, hey." wooyoung cups your face, seeing sudden anxiety on it. "do you want me to drive you back?"
you take a moment to think. if he really meant evil, wouldn't he do something by now? he wouldn't comfort you, right? wouldn't offer you a ride back? or is this just a little foreplay for him before he does something to you and leaves you to rot here?
"i mean it," the man caresses your cheeks with his thumbs.
"no, i'm good. i think."
"i am not doing anything until i am sure of it."
"no, no, i really am. i just..." you trail, looking around, "...i am very new to all of this, that's all."
wooyoung takes both of your hands, guiding you towards the stone benches and table. he sits you on the table, and he sits on the bench in front of you. he doesn't break eye-contact with you as he rubs your thighs, slightly squishing the flesh for your comfort and for his pleasure. he doesn't go further though. he gives you time to relax, until your feet start slightly swinging off the table from boredom.
"tell me about yourself."
"like what?"
"anything. just talk. i want to hear you speak. you don't do much of it, and you have such a pretty voice, especially when you make those little moans."
your cheeks are burning, and you can only look down at your hands playing with the hem of your skirt.
"come on, tell me. what do you do except studying and riding pillows these days?"
you want to say that you don't ride pillows, but the playful smile on his lips is too sweet to ruin it.
"i read, like, a lot."
"what genre is your favorite?" the man's voice is now low and raspy, his hands now slowly sliding underneath your knees.
"take a wild guess?"
"erotica?" he laughs.
you laugh with him, not yet aware of his little plan and the reason he brought you to a place far from people.
"well, tell me. what did you learn from it?"
it's like a switch was found on you. wooyoung is taking in every word you are so excitedly giving him, every expression you make as you remember various paragraphs that had you touching yourself late at night, or sometimes in the middle of the day at most random places.
"no way, you touched yourself in your college bathroom?" he is in disbelief.
"believe it or not, it becomes stronger than me. so, yes. multiple times, actually."
"what exactly did you do?" wooyoung asks, genuinely interested.
you have passed the shame barrier. the way he is caressing your skin and so comfortably talking to you about these things have you finally dropping your walls down. not even your friends have made it this far into the conversation without a smart remark or a grimace.
"just, rubbing myself, i guess? ah, i once used a water bottle to do it. it was so hot that day, and my bottle was wet and cold, and my brain just clicked."
wooyoung seems impressed, nodding his head with approval.
"i might have touched myself a little in the last row of the classroom."
"oh?" he is intrigued, mind already picturing you hidden in the last row behind your studying laptop, faking the writing while your other hand played with his new favorite thing in the world. "like this?"
the sudden contact with your clit makes you jolt, a gasp escaping your lips. he spins it in slow circles, much like you in that boring class. you breathe slowly, mouth already running dry from the sight in front of you. wooyoung stares deep into your eyes, tongue wetting his lips, and his hair messy from the highway wind. he looks incredibly good in his leather jacket and the chain necklace. you can hear yourself becoming wet, noises making both of you breathe shallow and feeding your lust drive. you feel exposed under the neon lights, under wooyoung's stare, on the side of the road. yet the pleasure is overpowering everything, and you find yourself shamelessly grinding your hips against his thumb. his confidence is affecting yours, and seeing him not give a single fuck about the location or the passerbies, it is unleashing something inside of you.
"fuck, angel, even your cunt sounds so cute."
you give yourself a moment of bravery, fingers hooking under his chain necklace and pulling his body towards you. your lips touch his, warm plush making your thighs clench. he chuckles against you, then leaves a few pecks on your bottom lip. he tugs it between his teeth, gently biting it and swiping his tongue on it. you give yourself to him, completely at his control, and only follow what he does.
he removes his hand from you, resulting in a whine leaving your mouth. he laughs again, pulling away for a moment.
"patience, baby. you're doing very good."
he kisses you again, his hands snaking around your waist and under your top. he feels your skin, the lace of your bra, plays with the hook, but doesn't undo it yet. he grazes your spine with his trimmed nails, giving you goosebumps. you shiver in his hands, wanting nothing more but to relax in his hands and have him do that to you all night long.
his tongue is restless against yours, gently rubbing against it, teeth accidentally clashing from the passion getting the most out of him. he wants all of you, right here, right now. but he can't have you just yet. like he said, he would destroy you. he can't hold back that much. he almost melts when he feels your fingers gently tug at his hair, your other hand subconsciously resting on his chest. he thinks it's cute how you are at a position above him and higher than him, yet he still has all the control over you. he also thinks it's cute how your legs are still swinging from the stone table, while you kiss him back and try to keep up with him. your kisses are short, your tongue soft, and your hair is tickling his cheeks, a complete opposite of his deep and long kisses, with an occasional teasing bite.
"wooyoung," you mumble, pulling away.
he hums, waiting for you to respond. you rest your forehead against his, taking a moment to breathe normally again.
"i want to cum on your tongue, please?" you ask so sweetly, big eyes staring into his.
"i had something else in mind, though. but i'll see what i can do, since you asked me so nicely."
he isn't sure how he can feel so soft and so hard for someone. you are the first one that is actually taking his time with him and listening to him to make it all more enjoyable. the rest of them wanted it quick, and frequent. he prefers it this way now, with more lust building up, and he knows the result will pay off. maybe you are growing impatient, maybe you'd just smack him right there on the spot, but he is very fixed on his idea, and he loves that you are listening him so patiently.
"lay down for me."
you lay on the cold surface, elbows digging into the uneven stone while they support your upper body so you can look at him. your breath hitches when his hand slides up your body, between your breasts, and up to your lips.
"open up."
and you do, taking his two fingers into your mouth. you swirl your tongue around them, slow, maintaining eye-contact with him. you are pretty sure you're dripping all over the table now, if not all over his pants too. he toys with your tongue for a while, too immersed in the way you're licking him up.
fuck, how good you'd take his cock. he'd push so slow between your glossy lips, which he would coat with his precum, and he would gently test your limits and have you gagging around him. wooyoung stops the train of thoughts before it was too late, and pulls his fingers out of your mouth. he then runs them up and down your slit, toying with the folds more than the clit. you want to groan from frustration, but you have to be patient, just like he said.
he spreads your folds, tongue diving right into the tip of your clit. your fingers reach into his hair, pulling at the dark strands and burying his head deeper into your cunt. he is loving every bit of it, willingly pushing himself deeper between your thighs and squishing them around his head. you hear him suck and lick, setting your heart on fire, and making your blood boil.
"wooyoung-" you gasp, clit abused by his restless muscle.
he only hums against you, lips sucking you slowly but with power. you don't know how loud you are, nor do you care. you let your voice loose, calling out his name, whining, bucking your hips into his mouth, moaning and chasing the orgasm that has already started to pool at the bottom of your stomach.
his fingers let go of your folds, instead focusing on a new place. he toys with your entrance, sending weird sensations through your body. ever so slowly, he pushes one finger inside, making you hold your breath at the uncomfortable feeling.
"that hurts-" you whine, all the pleasure gone.
"you can take it, right? for me?"
you look down at his eyes, the neon lights shining inside them.
"watch," he mumbles, nodding his head towards your drenched pussy.
you do as told, watching as his finger disappears into you, each pump a little less uncomfortable. he curls his finger upwards, unlocking a whole new sensation for you. you moan, more at the sight than the feeling. something about his veiny hand working on you and disappearing so smoothly inside of you is more arousing to you than a whole movie sex scene.
"i'm adding another one, alright?"
you gulp, then nod. you watch him carefully insert two fingers, slowly stretching you out. inch by inch, he fully inserts them, all the way to the knuckles, and stays there for a while.
"atta girl." he says, tone low and raspy, dripping with desire.
"it's too much," you whine, tears gathering in the corners of your eyes.
"just a little more, angel. i promise, it'll feel good." he coos, cupping your jaw with his other hand and caressing your cheek. "can you do that for me?"
you nod, fighting hard to push the tears back. the last thing you want is to turn out a coward, after all those erotica books you've told him about. reading about all that monster porn, fairy porn, and whatnot, yet you can't take two human fingers. pathetic.
"look at you, taking me so well." he praises, moving his fingers at a faster pace now.
you feel your hole stretching for the first time, and you are not sure if the sensation you are feeling is enough to make you cum. you stay still, watching him work on you, and focusing on relaxing your muscles around him. he curls his fingers up again, and another moan escapes your lips. he leans in, just enough to feel you breathe into his mouth. proper moans finally leave your mouth, and you leave all the gasps and shallow breathing behind. you shamelessly moan into his mouth, hands gripping anything they can; from his clothes and chain, to his hair and shoulders. you rock your hips along with his pumps, finally finding a path towards the sweet release. but wooyoung shows no intention of speeding up, even though you tried taking the matter into your own hands. you feel like spilling over any moment now, but the way he switches between slow and slower is driving you crazy.
"shit," he curses, suddenly pulling your body into his lap.
you moan when you sit on his fingers, knuckles trapped deep in your hole. you don't have time to process what is happening, a bright light shining into wooyoung's eyes and your back.
another motorcycle stops beside his, two people your age getting off of it.
"hey, what's up?" the stranger greets, politely waving.
the girl doesn't spare you a glance, but instead opts to stare at wooyoung.
"we're just gonna take a five minute break, sorry to bother you guys." the young man explains.
"that's fine," wooyoung smiles back.
the stranger then leaves behind one of the trees, and the girl takes a seat on the opposite of you two.
"aren't you, like, jung wooyoung?" her voice is pure torture, squeaky and fake.
"uh, yes."
"you have an enormous dick, babe. fuck, i masturbate to you almost every night."
your heart clenches, but apparently, so does your pussy, because wooyoung is quick to give you another stretch of his fingers inside you. you bite your lip, head falling on his shoulder. your back is turned towards the girl, so you cannot see if she is doing anything to get wooyoung's attention away from you. you don't like it.
"glad you enjoy my content," he replies calmly, as if he gets that every day.
maybe he does. and just then, you remember what wooyoung is. he is a cam boy, a porn star. he isn't a guy who took you on a date outside of the city. he is just someone who got tired of fucking experienced people and wants to try something new. you bite the inside of your cheek, tears gathering in your eyes now for a whole different reason.
it's his fault that he's so nice to you. didn't he say he would destroy you? you have developed a crush on him, and you didn't even realize. you need to back off, as soon as possible, before you become one of his toys for views. and with his sweet talk, it could happen without you even processing it first.
"do you do those live fuck invites anymore? i'd love to be your guest sometimes. maybe you know me, i was at top five performers last month?"
"ah, rosiedesires?" he is quick to answer.
his fingers slowly move, and you have to bury your head into his neck to keep yourself from making any noise. he smells heavenly, the scent of musk making you a little dizzy. you don't realize you are panting and whining, until he leans down to your ear.
"be good." he whispers with a little stern tone, nuzzling his nose into your cheek and leaving a quick peck there. if his fingers weren't up your pussy right now, you would've felt butterflies.
you don't know if he is mad at you, or if it's just a part of his play. either way, as bad as you are feeling, you don't want him to stop. you want him to make you cum, so that you can leave and cut all communication with him. you'll manage on your own without him, and there's still yunho. well, was. but knowing his feelings for you, he'll be quick to make up with you.
"friday night sound good?"
"yes, of course. perfect! can't wait, our followers are gonna be so excited."
did he just make a dick appointment while his fingers are deep inside of you? while you are holding back tears on his shoulder? while you are almost biting off the inside of your cheek?
"but wait, i don't do taken people. is that your partner or something?"
"ah no, that's just my coworker. he drives me home every night, we live in the same building. and uh, that..." she trails, probably pointing at you, "...is not your girlfriend?"
"no, no, of course not. she's also someone i've met on the site."
someone i've met on the site.
of course, what else did you think? that he was also falling in love with you? how stupid. now you know how yunho felt. you know exactly how he felt, when you made him feel dumb for having a one sided love. though, this isn't love yet, but still.
"shy, i see. hello, do you speak?"
the way she is talking to you is making you feel humiliated and small. as if you're an alien, asking if you speak.
"whore." you mumble.
"what?" she asks, confusion evident in her voice.
you finally raise your head, cheeks puffed and eyes red. wooyoung finally sees how bad he fucked up, and his heart breaks a little at the sight.
maybe it was just the sexual frustration. maybe it was the anger. maybe the disappointment. or maybe just the way she chewed that gum and looked at you like you were a piece of shit on the side of the road. whatever it was, it gave you enough of confidence to repeat yourself.
"whore."
"you stupid bitch," she scoffs, and you almost laugh when you see red lipstick smeared on her teeth as she calls you more names.
"openly talking about fucking a random guy and then getting offended by a single word? fucking weirdo." the words are quicker than your mind, and you feel wooyoung's fingers leaving you and instead gripping your waist.
"listen here, you fucking prude, i will fuck you up-"
"alright, let's take you home." wooyoung interrupts. "rosie, i'll reach out to you these days."
"sure thing, baby."
not so gentle anymore, wooyoung hands you the helmet. the change in his behaviour in front of a different woman is baffling to you. you feel like throwing up, and dropping right there in the middle of the road. anger is building up inside of you, enough for you to push the helmet back into his hands.
"put that on." he orders, brows knitted.
"no." you spit out.
"i will not repeat myself." his tone lowers, yet his gaze darkens.
"you don't have to." you strike back, not aware of the consequences building up.
"do you want to fucking hurt yourself? put this on right now, before i put it on for you."
fear creeps into your body, slow, and grows more with each second that passes and his gaze stays on you. you gulp, suddenly finding yourself in a mental conflict. you do not want to go with him. you want to stay here, curl up under the table and cry until morning, and mourn that little hope you had left and that he crushed. yet he is your only way home. but it is such a long drive, and you don't have the energy to be near him.
so you turn your back, and start walking towards the city lights.
"and just what do you think you are doing?" wooyoung grabs your elbow, pulling your body against his.
"leave me be."
"i asked, what do you think you are doing?" he asks again, gaze not softening.
"i am going home."
"you're-"
"jung wooyoung," you say through gritted teeth," i. am. going. home."
and with that, you start your way to the distant skyscrapers. it hurts you that only two minutes after, two motorcycles pass by you, one of them very familiar. he only spares you a glance through the mirror, then speeds up and disappears.
finally, you cry. loud sobs, chest heavy and body shaking. you drag your legs for what seems like hours, yet the buildings remained the same. you pull out your phone, searching through contacts. nobody is close enough with you for you to call them and pick you up. except your only fast dial, yunho.
what is there to lose? you've reached the bottom anyways.
it takes only two rings for him to pick up, and you fail to greet him. instead, a sob leaves your mouth.
"tiny?" he calls, voice concerned.
"can you please come get me?"
to say that yunho was furious would be an understatement. you haven't told him anything yet, but it was enough to find you sitting alone on a bench outside of the city, on a road where prostitutes and dealers often met, with ripped panties laying on the floor.
his heart is tight, and he feels his throat closing as he approaches you. dark lines decorate your puffed cheeks, the makeup you always so happily put on now a fluid disaster. you run into yunho's arms, finally warm and secure. he buries his noise into your hair, leaving kisses on top of your head as he rubs your back. he knows what to do when you're upset, and you are grateful for that. you need silent support, no questions, no getting you to talk, just someone's presence and comfort. you finally look into his eyes, and just when you thought you cried it all out, you start sobbing again.
"it's okay." he assures you, cupping your face.
"can i stay-" you hiccup, your lungs having a hard time to balance breathing and speaking, "can i-"
you sob again, frustrated because you can't form a sentence. you feel like ripping your hair out because of your stupidity.
"you can stay at my place," yunho understands, gently guiding you towards his car and opening the back door for you.
"no, no-"
"there's more space for you to lay down. trust me, you'll be comfortable."
"i want the front."
"but-"
"please."
yunho doesn't immediately drive to his place. he drives past the highway exits for the city, and you are too tired to question it. you fight to stay awake, but the burning sensation of your eyes is making it quite difficult. every now and then, yunho glances at you, making sure you're alright and comfortable. you have your seat pushed back, and your body turned towards him. it makes you feel safer when you open your eyes and see him in front of you.
the lights are fading, allowing the moonlight to take over and illuminate yunho's face. has he always been this pretty?
you're skipping classes, opting to stay in yunho's bed instead. you're rotting in his room, only watching him come and go. he has a job, and classes to attend, and by the time he finally gets home, you are fast asleep. the food he so carefully prepares you stays cold on the counter, flies getting to it before you do. it is making him sad, seeing you in such a state. you didn't speak of that night, and he didn't want to ask in case you go further into your shell.
today was no different. you are awoken by his alarm, then him tossing and turning on his side. he is careful to leave a distance between you two, even when he is asleep. you feel the warmth leave the space behind your back, then hear footsteps. you hear shuffling, and you open your eyes to see what he is wearing today.
he wears a plain white t-shirt, black ripped jeans, and a leather jacket. the weather is still confusing, and you are glad you don't have to tell him to bring a jacket with him. he also wears his signature boots, sitting on your side of the bed as he puts them on.
"yuyu?" you call.
"yes, sweetheart?"
"when are you coming home today?"
he stays silent. you think he doesn't hear you, so you repeat. yunho sighs.
"i don't have classes today. and i have a day off."
"oh," is all you can say. you aren't sure if it's a sound of disappointment or surprise. either way, you are not thrilled.
"i'll be back in a few hours."
he doesn't look at you. instead, he stands up, picking up his bag and house keys. you finally sit up straight, blanket still wrapped around you.
"where-" you clear your throat, voice coming out raspy and cracking, "-where are you going?"
"a date."
yunho finally spares you a glance, one enough to let you know that he grew tired of you playing with his emotions, and is tired catering to you when all of his efforts have gone to waste.
"there's food in the fridge if you get hungry. i'm having breakfast outside."
then there you are, again in the dark room, alone with your thoughts. you think about both of them. yunho, who has been by your side for so long, and has respected your boundaries despite his strong feelings. and wooyoung, who is there just a few weeks, yet has such a strong impact on you. you feel discarded by both sides. yunho? justified. wooyoung? not as much.
yes, he is just a porn star. yes, you may be delusional. and yes, he might fuck other people. but the urge in you to feel him just one more time, to let him teach you so you can be good enough for someone you truly care about, is burning inside of you.
bullshit. you want to be good enough for him. you have always been way more intrigued by things you cannot have. wooyoung is an unattainable goal, something you can only dream of having. then again, what do you actually want with him? you only know him sexually, you know nothing about him as a person. you only crave him physically, while you crave yunho emotionally.
but you can't have both, and the way the tables have turned, you are left with neither.
the day is slow, and the sun is going down with the tiktoks on your phone screen. when you feel your stomach tighten and growl, you finally glance at the room around you. it is dark, it smells like old clothes, and the lack of fresh air starts suffocating you. yunho's washed, unironed work clothes sit on his gaming chair, waiting to be ironed by him. it would have been done long time ago, if you didn't take up his whole room.
you switch between the apps, from tiktoks to reels, to youtube shorts, then back to reels. you've seen every video possible, not a single one funny anymore. you feel numb. your stomach is giving you signals, which you so successfully ignore. much like your bladder. it is hitting your ovaries, causing indescribable pain, yet you choose to lay there and mourn over your will to live. you return to the instagram homepage, and when you see yunho's icon in the stories, you just have to click it. when you do, you see him posing with a young woman your age, at the breakfast place you used to visit the first year of college. he has ordered his usual, you notice. and she has ordered yours.
he looks genuinely happy, his smile wide, and his eyes squinted. his arm is wrapped around her shoulders, and the other one holds the phone taking the picture. she is busy holding his face in her hand, lightly squishing his cheeks, just like you like to do.
"fuck me." you groan, then shut your phone off.
as if a switch has clicked inside of you, you run to the bathroom, eager to end your suffering. it takes you less than half an hour to take a shower, put on clean clothes, and do the basic skin care you have ignored for a few days now. you use yunho's expensive products, of course. he won't mind as long as he doesn't know you used them.
by the time the sun sets, the room looks brand new. you have put on new sheets, dusted the shelves, vacuumed the floor, and even ironed his clothes and neatly put them in the closet. the messy notes on his desk were now waiting for him in the drawer, with an attached pink note from you of the solution to the math problem he has been trying to solve on four pages now.
in the kitchen, you fish for ingredients. you decide to make his favorite for when he comes home, to at least thank him somehow for giving you comfort and support these days.
what time do you think you are coming?
yunho: around half an hour to an hour, i think. why?
i am making dinner, i didn't want to start early so it doesn't get cold.
you see the three dots on his screen popping up a few times, then disappearing. you set the phone aside, focusing on the garlic and onion in the pan so they don't get burnt. he loves your pasta bolognese, and won't eat it anywhere but from you. special flavor, he says. you don't have the heart to tell him that you just add in one more spice that the restaurants don't. you don't want to break the little tradition of you making pasta late at night for the two of you.
your phone pings, twice.
wooyoung has started a live! tap to watch.
yunho: i'm not coming for dinner. sorry x
and it's all it takes. really, that's all.
it takes less than five minutes for you to shut off the stove, then settle in the freshly made bed, yunho's boxers already pooling at your ankles. you realize how pathetic you look, getting ready to touch yourself to a guy that left you on the side of the road, in your best friend's bed. but to be fair, you were stubborn too. maybe you just didn't expect him to let you go so easily. maybe you expected him to stay back and comfort you, say sorry because of his harsh actions. or at least reach out to you afterwards. but no, jung wooyoung kept his distance. you checked the messages, regularly. not even an online tag from him. nothing.
until now.
wooyoung has started a live with rosiedairies! tap to watch.
your stomach tightens. is it friday already? time for that dick appointment. your finger hovers over the notificaton, mind working hard to figure out whether or not you can handle looking at something like that. you convince yourself that you can. it's just sex. it's not like you've never seen it before.
your finger taps the notification, and your screen take up two naked bodies, already going at it. it isn't hot at all. you could swear that all your arousal has dried up within two seconds.
wooyoung has the camera showing her face as she stays in doggy position and only his lower body is visible behind her, hips snapping harshly into hers. it doesn't look real. it look so staged and fake, ugly and raw. but she seems to love it, judging by the way her eyes roll to the back of her head and the noises overpowering the ones of skin clapping. wooyoung pulls her hair, and even though you've fantasized about that too, it isn't quite like this. all that hair pulling in your fanfics and books was indeed harsh, but still with a note of passion and love. this? this was pure pain.
"harder, harder-" she chokes, seductively looking at the camera.
what she asks, wooyoung delivers. the grip on her waist makes her skin white, likely to leave bruises afterwards. he picks up the camera, angling it on her bottom and his pelvis. the sight isn't a turn on for you, but you notice the condom, the bruises on her skin, and the scratch marks on his body. the people in the comment section are going feral, giving him orders on what to do to her, on what they'd like to do to him, and sending lots of money. you're grossed out, and just when you are about to exit the site, you hear the front door shut.
you pull the boxers up, jumping out of the bed and making it. you lock your phone, throwing it on the nightstand, before rushing to the bathroom and shutting the door. you hear footsteps, and not double ones like you expected. you fix your hair in the mirror, trying for that i woke up like this look.
"it's me," he announces while entering the room.
"back already?"
"wow."
you fail to hide the smile because of his reaction. he was probably expecting to find you laying under a blanket with your phone on full volume, like he did for the past few days. you didn't even take care of yourself, let alone help him with chores. you wanted to redeem yourself, at least a little bit.
you exit the bathroom as nonchalantly as you can, as if you didn't just do a 180° in the time he was out. he looks even more dashing than when he left. his hair is messy and skin glowing, and his lips have that red tint that suits him so well.
"how was your date?"
"it was great," he avoids your gaze while scratching his neck, "we're going on a second one sunday evening. making it fancy this time."
"that's so awesome! i'm happy for you."
your acting is so convincing, it has yunho feeling disappointed with your behaviour. sure, you wouldn't be jealous. but wouldn't you be bothered at least a little bit? a random girl entering your lives and taking up his free time instead of you, and you are happy?
"what do you say we go out for breakfast tomorrow, and i'll tell you everything?" he tests the grounds.
"sounds wonderful." you don't drop your guard.
you forget that yunho doesn't know the actual situation with wooyoung. so when he stops in front of the coffee shop the next morning and holds the door open for you, you rather enter than make a fuss out of it. you slide into your usual seat, letting yunho take the orders. the familiar man exits the pantry, smile dropping when he sees his next costumer. he immediately searches for your figure in the seating area, and upon finding you, he fails to hide a smile. you, on the other hand, don't. you stand your ground, poker face on and emotions on standby. for now.
"iced americano and a strawberry mocha?"
"yes," yunho confirms, "extra-"
"extra syrup, whipped cream, pearls. got it."
yunho looks annoyed, but doesn't say anything. he almost throws the money at wooyoung, tells him to keep the change, then joins you at the table.
you finally take a good look at him. each day, he is getting more attractive in your eyes. did he always dress this handsomely? was he always this tall?
"you like my coat?" he laughs, noticing your stare.
"well, yes. suits you. the turtleneck too. when did you get a fashion sense?"
"i've got to attract the ladies somehow." yunho jokes, then becomes serious once he sees wooyoung approaching with the beverages.
the cup is placed in front of you, and right away, you see a difference. knowing that you'll let it slide, yunho decides to speak for you.
"pearl sprinkles. not this rainbow puke."
"i only have rainbow puke." wooyoung scoffs, throwing the paper straws on the table. "drink it, or don't. i don't care."
"you should've told me that when i ordered." yunho keeps pushing, and the tension between the two is making you squirm in the chair.
"well guess what?" wooyoung leans in, one hand on the table, the other on the back of your chair. his face is inches away from yours, eyes fixed on your widened ones.
"get away from her, that's highly unprofessional."
"if she minded, she would've said something," the barista looks over at yunho for a split second, then returns his gaze on you, "but she doesn't mind, do you, darling?"
stuck between not wanting to hurt yunho, and wanting to subconsciously submit to wooyoung, you remain silent. wooyoung stays in the position for what seemed like hours, even though it was mere three seconds of it, then finally takes his position behind the counter.
"right, forgot he's your new boyfriend," the man on your opposite scoffs and takes a sip of his beverage.
"he's not-"
"kiyomi will be here any minute, by the way. can't wait for you to meet her."
"woah, is she okay with meeting me so soon? i mean, your first date was yesterday?"
he shrugs, glancing at his phone, "i don't see why not. you're just a friend. it's not like you're a relative or someone closer."
ouch.
"right," you clear your throat.
as promised, she arrives, breaking the silence and interrupting yunho's twitter scrolling. she's pretty, just like on the picture. the moment she sits next to him and starts talking, you see she is obsessed with him. she is joyful, talkative, optimistic, everything that you currently aren't. you notice wooyoung looking over multiple times, but what you don't notice is the way yunho is examining your face, looking for any clues of jealousy or discomfort.
you seem unaffected, and it makes his heart ache. just what does he have to do to get to you? getting a girl just to experiment didn't work, and now he has to either let the poor girl go or keep fueling her hopes and leave her later, until he gets a reaction from you. yumho hates himself for doing that. but yunho hates you too, as much as he loves you. you break his heart every day, but every time you look at him, you put it back together so easily. he wants to kiss you, as much as he wants to push you away from himself. he is lost in his own emotions, and doesn't know what he wants anymore.
"excuse me, i'll be right back."
"where are you going?" yunho betrays himself, asking you too quickly.
"toilet. wanna come?" you try to lighten the situation with a joke, seeing his date tense up at his reaction.
"ah no, thanks. gross. you go enjoy yourself. don't fall in." he joins in the joke, also taking notice of his partner's body language.
you enter the toilet, ignoring the cash register where wooyoung has busied himself with typing something on the screen. the you in the mirror looks like she is mocking you, your clothes and your behaviour. you've put on the newest dress you had, and you don't even know for who. both of them? you like yunho's soft lingering gaze on you, yet you enjoy the way wooyoung looks a second away from devouring you on that table. it's a simple long sleeved dress, really, paired with knee-high boots yunho had bought you for christmas.
the door swings open, bumping into you and pushing you against the wall. you only catch a glimpse of the familiar apron, before the man cups your face and presses his lips on yours. you are taken aback, body frozen against the cold tiles. wooyoung holds your face gently, lips moving slow as to not scare you off more.
"i'm sorry, i'm so fucking sorry," he whispers against your lips, pecking them a few times before apologizing again.
"wooyoung-"
"please, let me make it up to you. i don't care what that cunt outside says, i don't believe him anyway, just let me make it up to you."
you're having a hard time thinking rationally. do you really trust him enough to not hurt you again? fuck, but his lips feel so good. but oh, how yunho's hugs feel like home.
but nobody has ever shown desire the way wooyoung does.
yet nobody has more patience for you than yunho.
"you're thinking too much. let me fix that."
your lips are trapped by his once again, this time more rhythmic. you give into the touch, erasing the man outside completely from your mind.
"you're so sweet."
you hum against his lips, hands tugging at his white ironed shirt, the first two buttons separated as always.
"so cute." kiss. "so pretty." kiss. "so adorable." kiss. "so perfect."
you're not sure where it is going, but you do not complain. you do not complain when he lifts you on the counter near the sink either, flipping your dress up and ripping your panties again. you feel your core tighten, and you think you'll just never get enough of the picture of him ripping your clothes apart.
"let me make you melt on my tongue. please, god, I need it. i so desperately need you, all of you."
"here?" you ask, glancing at the door.
"here, out there, in the pantry, at your place, my place, everywhere. i'd take you to the roof if you told me to."
"anyone could walk in-"
you gasp mid sentence, cold metal pressing against your clit. wooyoung intentionally rubs your folds with his knuckles, giving you the cold sensation of his rings. your head rests against the mirror, hips already grinding into his hand.
loosing his patience, wooyoung sinks to his knees, your legs resting over his shoulders. he dives in, like it's his last meal. he licks hot stripes up your clit, pointy part of his tongue flicking the tip of it. you moan each time he does so, feeling your bud already becoming abused.
while he usually takes his time with you, today he is quick to separate your legs and go feral on you. his tongue is quick, so quick that it has you shaking uncontrollably against his mouth. you're shuddering, begging, pulling at his hair, all at once. a blabbering mess, as he eats you like there's no tomorrow. he dips his tongue into your arousal, letting out a moan of satisfaction.
"can i please cum?" you ask, knowing that he never lets you. why would today be different?
"no, no. not yet." he moves away, standing up and getting back to your face. "it needs to be special."
"it's just an orgasm, how special can it be?"
"mine always are, believe me. i want to be your first real one. i want you to remember it." wooyoung says as he continues to caress your cheeks with his thumbs.
the action is affectionate, as if he just confessed to having a crush on you and didn't just eat you out. funny how every time you meet him, you end up getting absolutely devoured by him in ways that you didn't even read about. he is passionate about it, to the point that it makes you think that he does it for his own pleasure.
"come over to my place."
"what?" your voice comes out louder than you wanted it.
"my place. i'll take good care of you. give you what you deserve."
you don't have time to reply, he is pulling you off the sink and disappearing into a stall. a quick glance in the mirror is enough to make your hands shoot up to your hair, straightening it and fixing the smeared mascara on the corner of your eyes.
"hey?"
yunho's head peeks inside, scanning the room. he sees you alone, and immediately feels at ease.
"yes, yunho?"
"i just got worried, you've been here for a while." he admits.
"so you left your date alone?" you can't bear to look him in the eyes, not when you just finished messing with the person he saved you from the other night.
"to be truthful, i saw that shitass barista disappear somewhere, and i thought he came after you. i'd hate to think that something happened to you and i was sitting just outside."
you appreciate his truthfulness, and don't have the heart to tell him just how weak to your instincts you are.
"don't worry, i'm good. let's go."
wooyoung: it's been almost a week
wooyoung: you don't think about me at all?
wooyoung: my offer, i mean. not me.
you don't know if you're being delusional, but you feel like the tables have turned. which is why you have reached out to another friend, one that doesn't have feelings for you and won't try to sabotage, well, whatever this is.
"honestly, from all these messages, you have unknowingly made him chase you. notice how you don't say much and he comes back texting you multiple times?" choi san is quick to explain, using his own flirting skills to decipher the conversation.
he lays on his stomach on your bed, pillow under it and legs swinging in the air. his freshly dyed blonde hair is a dry mess, struggling to hold onto his scalp. you wonder why his job requires him to ruin himself this much.
"now what do i do?"
"well, luckily for you, your lack of communication is what got you an advantage here. let's face it, you're dry as fuck."
"thanks."
"welcome. anyways, in your case, that's good. see? instead of giving up and leaving, he keeps coming back to you. and eating your pussy every time you two meet? are you kidding me? that man is obsessed with you."
at the mention of him eating you, your thighs clench, almost feeling his tongue down there. it is driving you crazy, having so much pleasure yet not reaching the peak. he is torturing you, on purpose.
wooyoung: i'll make you cum so hard you'll never wish for anyone but me
wooyoung: and that's a promise.
two new messages light up your phone, san grabbing it before you can. he covers his mouth, eyes wide as he reads the messages over and over. he unlocks the phone, and begins typing.
"no!"
"i'm doing you a favor!" he exclaims, running around the room and still typing.
you hear the sending sound, and your face heats up. he throws the phone on your bed, and sits right next to you.
"what have you done?"
"see for yourself. that, my dear, is called not being dry."
bold of you to think that i'll only wish for you
"that doesn't sound like me at all! you blew it!"
you are quick to bury your face in a pillow, already mourning all this time you've spent and regretting inviting san to help. but when another notification decorates your screen, you almost jump.
wooyoung: why don't you come over for a demostration?
"you do realize that if you go, you might lose your v-card?"
"i know."
"and you're sure that's the person you want to do it with?"
"yes."
he believes you as much as you believe yourself. you always thought your first time would be somewhere romantic, pre-planned, with the person you love and loves you back. not in the apartment of a porn star. and not with someone that only knows your name.
"you know, my heart really hurts for yunho."
"i invited you to avoid him. why are you bringing him up?" your fierce tone takes him aback, and it takes you aback too, you just manage to not show it.
"wow." san exhales.
"sorry, just- it's none of your business."
"how is it none of my business? i mean, i tried to not get involved, even came here to help you hook up with a complete stranger and help you throw away the best thing that can and will happen to you. i introduced you to yunho, knowing full well on his harmless little crush on you, and knowing full well that you were perfect for him. only to have you-"
"wait a minute, you can't guilt trip me into liking him."
the man in front of you is baffled with your reply, and you feel like you're not looking at one of your close friends anymore. now, you are looking at yunho's best friend, almost his younger brother. you forgot that before you, there was the two of them.
"someone seriously needs to fuck that attitude right out of you. you're acting like an animal in heat."
"well i'm fucking trying to!"
"well you're trying the wrong fucking way!"
"do not tell me who and how to fuck!"
the phone is pinging on your bed, not helping the situation at all. san is looking more disappointed than angry, his eyes becoming scarily dark.
"the fuck do you even know about fucking?"
"i know enough." you don't drop your guard.
san takes a step towards you, examining your face. then another, and another, until you are pushed in the corner of your room with him towering over you. there is nothing attractive about it in this situation, and you wish
"you may know about fucking, but you don't know shit about loving."
"shut up," is the only thing you manage to say, biting back tears.
"i am not guilt tripping you to like or love anyone, but the least you could do is let him down gently and stop playing push and pull with him. giving him hope, then shattering him right after it? not quite moral in my book."
"look, i'm in a difficult situation. i just- i like them both."
choi san laughs, sarcastically. he doesn't find it funny. he just doesn't know how to respond anymore.
"you don't like them both. you like wooyoung, and want to keep yunho as a backup."
"excuse-?"
"save it. i don't even know why i came here, helping you hurt my friend. you have started thinking with your pussy more than your brain, and you're losing people because of it. if you're horny, watch fucking porn."
with that, he grabs his leather jacket off your bed, and storms outside. you are feeling frustrated, angry, and sad. he is right, you know it. but you don't want to admit it. because somehow, in your head, if you don't admit it, it isn't like that. ignoring a problem makes it go away. simple as that.
you want to keep yunho, and his love, and his affection, but you want a taste of wooyoung so bad. so bad that your clit aches when you open his messages, yearning for his cold fingers and hot tongue.
wooyoung: do you like movies?
wooyoung: i thought we could watch the live adaptation of that book you like reading
wooyoung: what was it again?
wooyoung: if you want to, of course
wooyoung has sent a picture! tap to view.
you stop breathing for a moment, thinking of all the things you could expect in that image. you breathe out when you open it, seeing a pullout sofa and a blanket on it, along with snacks and two bottles of soda.
wooyoung: i'd be happy if you joined me :)
why, rosie unavailable?
wooyoung: i'm gonna go ahead and ignore that, for the sake of both of us
whatever that means
why are you the one sabotaging yourself now? yunho isn't here, and san has left too. then why?
wooyoung: it means that i don't like it when people mock what i do
wooyoung: and when people mock me, i become angry
wooyoung: and angry and horny don't go well together
wooyoung: unless you want to put it to test?
wooyoung angry fucking you? you grimace. would it be the kind of sex he did in his last live with that rosie girl? if yes, you are feeling very turned off right now. he must've sensed the lack of replying on your side, and is quick to respond again.
wooyoung: can't help it, sorry
wooyoung: just come over and we can hang?
your phone pings, sending you a message with a different name on top.
choi san: bet his new live will bring him a fortune. who else has taken someone's virginity live on a porn site?
what the fuck are you on about? there's no live.
choi san: that's what you think
choi san: or that's what he'll make you think
choi san: unless he convinces you to willingly do it
he wouldn't. would he? wooyoung who has asked you before each contact whether you're sure, or whether you're feeling nervous. wooyoung who already had his hands on your tits, and still wanted to ask if you're sure. he wouldn't secretly film you. he wouldn't.
what do you consider a hang? and why?
wooyoung: just hang? watch that movie and talk?
wooyoung: because
wooyoung: idk
wooyoung: you're so stiff and awkward yet i wanna know more about you and see you
wooyoung: i guess i want to be the one to unstiff you?
wooyoung: NOT LIKE THAT
wooyoung: i dropped my cool guy vibe just like that
wooyoung: look at me texting you multiple times in a row
wooyoung: i've never ever done that in my life for anyone
wooyoung: so...?
so san was right. you did unintentionally make him chase you. played hard to catch without even knowing it. you have a whole porn star folding for you, and offering you all you ever wanted. or at least you think you wanted.
ping!
yunho: hey just wanted to ask if everything is alright?
yunho: sorry if i somehow hurt you
yunho: you seem a little distant, and i know it might be because of the kiyomi situation, but i promise i care about you so much
yunho: if you want you can come over and we can make that pasta together?
yunho: i also want to talk to you
yunho: properly
it's now or never.
you gonna pick me up or?
you sit in the familiar car, the smell of it relaxing you. he knows how to make scents work and not make them literally bite your nose. you take a good look at him. he wears a simple short sleeved black t-shirt, along with grey ripped jeans and black boots. his hair is a little messy, but it only adds up to his look. every time you see him, you forget just how good he looks.
"angel?"
"wooyoung?"
he laughs, eyes not moving off the road.
"are you okay?"
"yes." you simply reply, shifting your attention to the surrounding houses.
you don't speak the rest of the way, just enjoying his humming and wheel tapping. it isn't uncomfortable silence. at least not for you. you can also hear faint vibrations coming from your phone in your bag, and you know exactly who they belong to.
"whoever that is, they sure are persistent." wooyoung comments.
"sorry. i'll shut it off."
"oh, no. please. i was just noticing."
you finally take the phone out, screen bombarded with his notifications. just when you wanted to clear the notification tab, he calls, and you click the green phone.
"shit."
"hello?"
wooyoung glances at your phone, eyebrows furrowed. he keeps driving, not saying a word.
"hey, yunho, now is not a good time-"
"it never is lately anyway. listen, i will just say what i wanted to like this."
"yunho, no-"
"i love you. i don't even think about the words like or crush anymore, i know, i'm sure, that i love you. and i know you're slipping away from me, and i know there's no way to stop it."
you stare at wooyoung, who is carefully listening to the voice coming from your device. you are shaking, thoughts running wild. you are becoming more aware of your feelings towards yunho, and aware about the situation you are putting yourself in. you are on your way to shatter everything you've ever had with him, and everything you could've had with him. for just a taste of what seemed to only exist in your mind.
"i won't blame you if you go with him. i'm just afraid of you getting hurt, maybe worse than that night. and this time i might not be around to fix it. i do not have the energy anymore. i'm sorry."
san was right about this too, and you hate him for it. all this time you subconsciously kept yunho as a backup. you've convinced yourself that he isn't your type, and you did so good at it. until now.
"i'm not saying you should respond to any of my feelings, but it would've been nice if you came to me and said something along the lines of "sorry yunho, i don't think we will ever be what you want us to be" instead of luring me in and pushing me around. calling me when you need it, then ignore me when you get what you want. i hate that i love you, and i hate that i have to humiliate myself like this every damn time. but i promised myself this would be my last. unless you really wish to discuss all of this properly, and whether or not you want our friendship to continue despite all this. tonight is your last chance. i am speaking to you as a friend now. i want to know where i stand."
you are speechless. he has touched the darkest spot in your heart. that dusty corner reserved for love. the kind of love san accused you of not knowing. how are you supposed to respond when there is a whole man next to you, a man who has also asked you to hang and talk tonight?
"i'll wait until midnight. if you don't show up, that will also help me know where i stand. but then, know that you might not hear from me anymore."
the phone call ends just in time when wooyoung pulls up in his parking spot. he silently exits, opening the door for you. still overwhelmed by the one sided conversation that just happened, you remain seated.
"if you're going to be sulky like that, i will just drive you to him." wooyoung offers, annoyance clear in his tone.
you feel a little irritated for his lack of empathy. but who would empathize with such an awful person like yourself? wooyoung sighs, then crouches in front of the open door on your side.
"you can't sit on two stools at a time, angel. i understand that emotions are hard, and love is complicated. right now, i am offering you something simple, and something harmless. i am not looking for love, i think. i just want to help you discover, and i want to discover you."
not looking for love, that you know. but it feels different hearing it out loud. the i think part right after it went right over your head, only adding to the you really are dense agenda.
"yunho is offering you commitment. real love. something i'm not quite capable of giving you, or anyone. i think with my dick, and he thinks with his heart. that creates a problem for you, because you want to be loved, but you also want a dick to make you stop thinking."
you aren't sure if he is dirty talking, or if this is just the way he speaks about these things. you finally look at him. his hand reaches for yours, gently guiding you out of the car.
"you can sit down and think inside."
but there was not much thinking. you were quick to lay on top of wooyoung, entirely relaxed in his arms as his nails grazed the skin of your thighs. non sexually. just innocent pleasure and the movie playing in the back. but you can't relax all the way, because you know where tonight will lead. you squirming under wooyoung's touch, the only emotions present being lust and yeaerning. you liked yunho. you really did. but the way wooyoung handles you is not like any other. you need to have it, at least one more time.
"you're not watching the movie."
"i know."
"then what are you doing?"
"thinking."
wooyoung sighs. his hands halt on your waist, then help you sit up on his lower stomach as he stays laying down.
"be honest with me. what exactly do you want? i won't judge you."
"i don't know." you lie.
"let me try a different approach. what do you want with me? be completely raw, so we can both know where we stand."
and you do just that. tell him all about your desires, about the feeling of lust which you've mistaken as a crush towards him, about loving how desirable you are feeling when it comes to him, and everything that comes to your mind. he listens, slowly nodding his head as you speak.
"i guess i want to have a little fun with no commitment before the, you know, actual commitment."
"i understand. now, what do you want with yunho?"
"everything."
you do want everything with him. from the kisses he is dying to offer you to whatever kinkery he has hidden behind those shiny eyes. yunho is a man every girl wants, including you, yet he only has heart eyes for you. and you'd be stupid to let that go.
"then go for it."
"see, the thing is- i already got a taste of you. and i want closure. i want to finally get that orgasm you've been delaying for so long."
wooyoung nods, eyebrows a little scrunched. he is focused on putting a stray hair behind your ear, and when that hair refuses to obey him over and over again, he huffs, and finally gives your sentence attention.
"we need to discuss first. what kind of orgasm are we talking?"
"what do you mean?"
"well, now that you've finally come to terms with your feelings towards that yunho dude, taking your v-card is off the table?"
"yeah, i guess." you shrug, as if it was just a hug you were talking about.
"just to warn you, it hurts like hell."
"that i know. thanks."
"he can reach out to me for some tips if he wants. just saying."
"got it."
he smiles, then proceeds.
"filming is off the table?"
"uh-"
"just asking, not forcing. if we are going to do simple oral and, or, fingering, then you know... i'd maybe like some footage. at least for me to enjoy sometimes."
come to think of it, it is risky, and it is something that you wouldn't do ever again when or if you become yunho's partner. this is maybe a once in a lifetime opportunity, and you don't want to waste it.
"i'll give you back by midnight, baby." he winks.
"okay." you agree.
you feel your heart beat faster, and louder. you have just agreed to be filmed, in a stranger's house, touched by that same stranger, and the video will be up for so many people to see. so what? you'll ask him to blur or cut the face out of the frame. simple as that.
"come on then."
the young man stands up, giving you his open hand. little do you know that the gaze you're giving him from below him on that couch is making his pants feel very tight.
you accept his hand, and allow him to lead you to his room. your eyes land on the bed. the very same bed and pillows where he filmed that live, and many other lives after that. wooyoung then gently pushes you towards the bed, hands grazing your waist while his eyes admire your outfit. it looks so easy to take off.
he carefully pushes you on the bed, and you swear you've never felt a mattress so soft. he climbs on the bed, hovering over you and giving you one more head to toe scan.
"so pretty." he whispers.
"thank you." you say, not knowing what else to do.
he laughs, then leans in to give you a kiss sweeter than those cake pops you used to eat throughout your whole high school. he kisses you again, again and again, until you start yearning for more. you reach for his shoulders, hair, neck, anything to make him deepen the kiss and give you one of his passionate ones. he takes his time, playing with your bottom lip and tugging it between his teeth.
"patience." he instructs, then untangles your hands from his hair.
he reaches towards the nightstand. the same nightstand from which he pulled that clear toy out that night you discovered him. instead of something crazy, he pulls a single piece of long fabric. the fabric is shiny and pink, with lace decorating it.
"you trust me?"
"completely."
"that's a good girl." he kisses your forehead before putting the silk over your eyes. "raise your head for me a little bit."
you do as told, enough so he can tie it up behind your head. he adjusts your hair, letting it fall over your shoulders, then traces his finger down your neck and to your collarbones. you almost shiver at his touch. he continues his journey to your shoulders, gently pulling down the sleeves of your dress, then does the same to the other. you feel like everything is ten times more intense, since you can't see anything anymore.
he pulls his hand back, then shuffles on top of you for a while. you hear something hit the floor, and then feel the mattress dip between your legs. wooyoung takes your hand, guiding it towards a source of warmth. you breathe out when you touch his warm skin, nails yearning to dig into it. he helps you trace his abs, his formed chest, and all the way down to his defined v-line. you feel a few veins leading to a place of heaven, or hell, and you have to bite your lip to keep you from smiling.
this is exactly what you want.
"can i see?" you ask nicely.
"no. just feel." he declines, and you hear him smile as he says that.
"okay." you comply, using the opportunity to touch a little more
he then gets off the bed again, and you hear slight rattling. he must be setting up the camera. it doesn't take long for him to come back, placing an object next to you at a certain position.
"i'm only going to be filming myself and your lower body, alright? something like your point of view? you okay with that?"
"yes."
"you sure?"
"yes." you breathe out, feeling his hands caressing your hips.
"we need a safe word, angel."
"god, i don't know, just touch me already. please." you beg like a pathetic slut.
"i know you're impatient, but i really need you to think of a word."
"i don't know." you're becoming annoyed with him.
"how about..." he hums, then kisses your jawline, "mocha?"
"y-yes, that sounds good." you stutter as he plants kisses along your jawline, going down your neck and stopping at collarbones.
"so when you say mocha, i'm stopping everything i'm doing. got it?"
"yes."
"good. i'm turning it on now."
you hear a click, then a short sound. he waits a little, probably for people to join.
"hi, my favorite people. i would do some talking, but to be honest, i can't wait to dive into today's special."
you don' t have time to process his words, he is shuffling through the drawers again. wooyoung then takes your clothes off, and you help him by raising your hips, pulling your arms out your sleeves, all to make him satisfied. he plants a kiss on your knuckles, thumb grazing over them before he sets your hand back down. his lips hover above your skin, blowing cool air along the line of the lingerie bra you wore.
"i like you more in those pastels." he admits.
the man cups your breasts, slowly massaging them and letting his thumbs graze your tense buds over the thin black lace. you squirm under his touch, feeling the pleasure pool in your lower stomach. you swear you could cum from only nipple touching if he did it long enough. you could try that once.
"she's awfully quiet, isn't she? what should i do to her?" he speaks to the camera.
he then takes a few seconds to read the written suggestions, and then chuckles.
"take off the bra? oh, but i quite like it like this. it makes the situation sexier and more intimate. doesn't look like that raw porn you can find on pornhub, right?"
he is right. you got all dolled up for him, would be a shame if he took everything off so soon. you feel a warm wet muscle trace around your areola, building anticipation. his other hand plays with it too, not once touching the nerve ending that is angrily sticking out and demanding attention. he finally gives in, closing his lips around the tense bud and ever so lightly grazes it with the tip of his tongue.
you gasp, arching your back from the mattress. his hand is quick to find its place on your stomach, pushing your body back down and caressing your skin along the way.
"atta girl." he praises, seeing just how obedient you are for him.
his teeth graze your nipple, then gently tug at it. you twitch, hands flying towards him in hopes to grab his hair. he is quick to grab your wrists, pinning your hands above your head.
"i'm the one doing the exploring, angel. you lay there for me like the patient pretty doll you are."
you nod, immediately becoming still. his fingers find a path down your stomach, to the line of your panties. he caresses the skin right above your clit, circling it, grazing the inside of your thighs, your folds, all while ignoring the burning place right in the middle of all that. your hips almost buck into his hand, but you remember to be good. he pushes the panties aside, revealing you to himself and the camera.
"oh, so pretty." he exhales.
you hear him put his fingers in his mouth, coating them in saliva, then dip between your folds. you whine when he touches the tip of your clit, spinning it in circles and making you gasp for air. your hands are still pinned above your head, and his knee is fast to hold your legs open by pressing the inside of your thigh into the mattress. he then dips his fingers below, first one, then two. the feeling of strange and a little uncomfortable is back, but when he starts pumping in and out at a slow pace, occasionally curling his fingers up, you are a moaning mess. you can hear just how wet you are for him, and each time he buries his fingers deep inside of you, you have to fight the urge to moan louder.
"wish you could see just how well you're taking me."
you remember how absolutely hot it looked that night, seeing his fingers disappear inside of you.
"good, good girl. one more? think you can handle?"
there is two already, but you still nod. he adds another finger, deliciously stretching you out and giving you trouble breathing. it seems like hours have passed, and wooyoung is still content with fingering you at a pace that is too slow even for you. he is enjoying the sounds and view you are offering him, and is too mesmerized by the way he is so smoothly disappearing inside of you, all while you breathe heavily and buck your hips into his hand.
you feel your wrists become free. sore, but free. wooyoung then grabs something from the nightstand, and shuffles with it for a few moments. you hear light buzzing, and your heart jumps a little. fuck, he is doing everything just right. as if he entered your mind and stole all your wishes.
he brings it to your nipple, circling it just like his tongue is circling your clit. you are overwhelmed, struggling to keep still like he instructed.
"wooyoung-" you whine.
"i know, baby. feels so good, doesn't it?" he coos, sending shivers up your spine.
"yeah," you whine again, not quite capable of doing anything else.
"yeah," he hums. "you're doing a very good job, angel. hold on tight for me. don't let go just yet."
he is taking his sweet time, acting like this is only the beginning of a very long movie. you feel like cumming, and you don't want to do that just yet. you're having too much fun, and the buildup is much more pleasurable than the orgasm itself. at least you think so. his voice is soothing, low and raspy, and that alone is enough to make you feel like you came ten times already.
his tongue dives between your folds again, adding the third source of pleasure and shooting arrows to your core. you tremble under his passionate licks, thighs struggling to stay open. he hums into your clit, vibrations matching the ones on your nipple. he spins the gadget around your buds, slowly, then teases the areola again. you hear yourself become louder and louder, and he doesn't seem to mind. it's killing you that you can't see him. he must surely look gorgeous between your legs, working his tongue on you like it's his last feast.
his plush lips close around the tip of your clit, gently tugging it, tongue spinning it in slow circles just how you like it. but today, it all seems a little too slow. you are eager to see just how he will make you cum. maybe you can take two?
"how much longer?" you ask, feeling a bit stupid.
"oh, so much longer. i'm not letting go of you just yet."
the time is slow, and pleasure still bearable. you don't know how much longer you can hold. luckily, he pulls away from you, just in time. you feel his wet digits trail your bottom lip, as if asking permission to enter. you open your mouth, taking in the arousal that exists just for him. you taste yourself on his fingers, working your tongue around them so that you don't just lay completely useless. he hums, watching you swirl around them, and letting them go with a little suck at the end.
"i'm going to make you feel so good, princess. give you the best treatment you'll ever get."
you feel all fluttery and fidgety from his words. you could listen to him forever.
"come here."
you feel him sit behind you, back resting against the wall, and his hands pull you into his lap. your bare back rests against his built chest, and you can't help but hum at the sensation. he chuckles, loving every bit of reaction you have to give him.
"face reveal?" he reads a comment, and you become tense in his hands. "no."
the firm no has you grabbing his thighs, legs automatically spreading for him to continue abusing your clit and hole. his fingers move your hair out of the way of your chest, and gently tuck it behind your ears.
"so pretty." he coos again, leaving a kiss on top of your head.
you melt into his arms at his never ending praises, and you can't get enough. you wish to be called pretty all day long. you wish to be kissed like that for the rest of your life. you love how desired he makes you feel.
"are you real?" you mumble, lost in the soft vibrations that are circling your entrance.
he laughs, then kisses your shoulder. "very much, sweetheart."
"it feels too good. you feel too good."
"i know, baby. i know."
the gadget on your cunt is small, and still at a low speed. he uses his other hand to spread your folds, enough to start inserting the small vibrator inside. you yelp a little, the stretch wider than his fingers.
"easy," he whispers, "just like that..."
he fully inserts it, and you feel so full and in pain.
"i'm not going all the way, don't be afraid."
he pumps the toy in and out of you, enough to get you used to the new stretch. his other hand toys with your clit and tricks your brain into focusing on the pleasure rather than pain.
"wooyoung?"
"yes, love?"
"i thought you said you'd destroy me."
his movements stop. you bite your lip, trying to keep the smirk spreading on your lips. a gasp leaves your lips as his hand grabs your jaw, pulling your head back so that he can look at your face. he gets close, so close that your lips almost touch.
"is that what you want?"
his hot breath is so inviting, but when you reach to kiss him, he moves away, and grabs your jaw firmer.
"you want your tight little cunt to be destroyed? you want me to throw you around and use you like that toy you watched me fuck? you want me to fuck the feeling for the other guy out of you? so that you don't see nobody else but me? so that your pussy only fits on my cock? so that your body only responds to me?"
you are breathless as he spills all his intentions out, with each sentence sending goosebumps all over your body.
"that what you want? for me to fuck you dumb?"
"yes." you simply say.
you expected him to push you down on the bed. you expected him to pull your hair. you expected him to degrade you, spank you, and whatnot. but what you did not expect was the gentle tug of the blindfold, and a caress of your cheek as his grip on your jaw softened. you open your eyes, and meet his dark ones.
"are you sure?" he asks quietly.
"what?" you act dumb.
"you want me to...?"
"i want you to fuck me." you finally say it.
it seems like he has stopped breathing for a moment. he takes a few seconds to examine your face, looking for any signs of hesitation. when he sees none, he places the silk on your hands, tying them up and placing them in your lap.
"i meant what i said," he speaks to you and only you now, back turned towards the camera. "i am going to take a good care of you. remember your safety word?"
"mocha."
"good girl." he places a kiss on your forehead, then pushes you to lay down.
you watch him unbutton his pants, finally seeing more of that v-line you are suddenly very obsessed with. he throws them on the floor, along with the boxers, letting his cock free from the grip of the fabric. your jaw drops at the size. not enormous, but still too big for your virgin self. this is going to hurt like hell.
"can i suck you off?" you ask, subconsciously doing the big eyes thing he so much loves.
"are you sure? i wanted this to be about you."
"i'm sure." you say, eager to get a taste of him. "just, uh... guide me?"
"with pleasure."
he lays on the bed, elbow holding his upper body up as his other hand brings your face close to his cock. you didn't think it would look this clean and... pretty. you stick your tongue out, finally getting a taste of him. he hums, throwing his head back. you lick up from the base to the tip, immediately taking him in your mouth. he gasps, not expecting it so soon. he fills your mouth deliciously, resting against your tongue as his precum spills down your throat. he feels smooth, and very hot.
"god, so good," he groans, hand reaching for your hair to guide you up and down.
you bob your head up and down, too impatient to go slow like he did. you want to hear him more, knowing that you are the reason for those sounds and words.
"even your mouth is so tight, i might cum if you continue." he pulls your head away.
"you're so mean," you whine.
"i know," he coos for the third time today, knowing just what it does to you. "let me take care of you."
you try to lay down, but he holds you in place. you are confused. does he want to jump to some insane positions right away?
"missionary hurts. we will try something else. that good?"
you nod, and he sits against the wall again. he pulls you towards him, finally kissing you again. he showers you with soft kisses, and even though he promised whatnot, you are still experiencing a very soft and gentle version of him. you like it, but the thought of all the things he has listed for you is making your blood boil with excitement.
his hands cup your ass, raising your body and slowly bringing it towards his cock. you look down, noticing that a condom is already sitting on it. when did he manage to do that?
"slow," he whispers, guiding your hips so that you slowly start to sit on him, "just like that. good job."
you yelp at the uncomfortable stretch, and knowing that the pain is yet to come, you put your still tied hands around his neck and rest your head on his shoulder. inch by inch, he disappears inside of you, leaving no space empty. you feel so full and uncomfortable, your teeth sink into his shoulder to stop the loud moans of pain.
"hold onto me, love. it'll be better."
you forget the camera. you forget yunho. you forget san. you forget your feelings towards the other man. you will enjoy this, even if it was your last.
"can i move?"
"yes."
he keeps you close to him, lifting your hips slowly up and down. you hear the comment section flooding, and glance over at the laptop on the nightstand. each money donation makes a sound, and right now, there is tons of them. you enjoy all the praises written in the comments, talking about how well you are taking him, how obedient you are, and how innocent you look. you like it all a little too much.
wooyoung speeds up the pace, hips finally colliding with yours with a bigger force. you don't let go of his shoulder just yet, still focusing on the pleasure and trying to ignore the pain. he is a groaning mess, and little did you know that he has to use every ounce of self control in him to not just slam you on the bed and fuck you open for him. he grips your hips, sure to leave bruises afterwards, and keeps the same pace for a while.
"feeling okay?"
"yeah," you stutter between little gasps and moans.
"can i speed up?"
"yes, please."
the man finally lets himself loose, picking up your body by your waist and moving his own hips instead in a fast pace. your jaw drops, and your eyes roll back from the newfound point of pleasure. you are completely lost in his touch, scent and voice. he is grunting with each push, reaching deep inside of you and touching a particularly sensitive spot you didn't know you had.
"fuck, you're so wet." he hisses. “look how well you take me.”
having enough of the position, he finally throws you against the mattress, yet his gaze still has a hint of worry for you. when you smile, it's his sign to dive into your gardens again. the new position feels odd, and good in a new way. he reaches for a pillow, putting it under your hips for easier access, and finally fulfills his promise.
his hips dive into yours, colliding with force and awaking the orgasm inside of you. the pace isn't fast, it is just right. you have enough time to savour every delicious pump he delivers you.
"i want to cum so bad, please." you beg, feeling a bit overstimulated.
"just a little longer, hm?"
he speeds up the pace, grabbing your waist and practically slamming you against his cock, while his hips stay resting. you feel like that toy, being used like this. you can't help but develop a secret size kink, seeing how easily he is handling you and throwing your body around how he likes it. your eyes catch the gadget near him on the bed, and you grab it. his eyes are focused on the place you're connecting, admiring the view with scrunched eyebrows. he is so into it, that he doesn't even see you put the vibrating gadget on your clit. it is the sudden flood of comments again that makes him look away.
"chasing that orgasm like a thirsty little cumslut?"
you nod eagerly, focusing on the pool of pleasure threatening to spill over. a volcano waiting to erupt. a bottle of champagne waiting to pop.
"wooyoung-"
"go on, baby. i've tortured you enough."
you moan, grabbing his hand for support as you slowly reach the peak.
"cum on my cock like it's your last." he grunts.
it takes you over the edge. a river spilling over the highest cliffs, hitting hard against the pond and creating waves all the way to the shore. it is ripping through your body, and you swear you feel in in the ends of your hair and the tips of your toes. your back arches from the mattress, shaking as shock waves continue to exhaust your body. you are a moaning and whining mess, grabbing anything you can, from his arms and hair, to the mattress and pillows above your head.
"fuck, angel, i'm close too." he warns.
"use me," you whine, still in a hazy state. "use me like that fuck toy."
hearing you speak that way sends him over the edge too, fingers digging into the skin of your waist, and eyes rolling back as he moans and groans. his hips become sloppy, and you feel something warm spill inside of you. it takes a few more pumps for him to come down from his high, and when he is done, he lets himself fall on top of you.
he doesn't speak. doesn't move. just breathes and holds you in his embrace. you lay there for a while, trying to calm your breathing and come back to your senses. with a single tap on the keyboard, he shuts the live off, not even looking at it. he does it that often, he doesn't need to look.
his head finds peace in the space between your shoulder and neck, and his arms caress the place that is full of red marks from his hands. his breathing slows, and when you look down, you realize he has dozed off. you do too, holding him against your chest and replaying everything that just happened.
when you wake up, you see that the sky has gotten darker. you reach for the phone, checking the time so that you won't be late to your arrangement with yunho. but then, you see a notification just underneath the digits showing a young night.
a single message, with an attached screenshot of a very familiar room and familiar nude people.
yunho: i think i'm ready to let go. you've made it so much easier. goodbye.
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
@minimoniac @miriamxsworld @kodzukein @woomyteez @mulletdaddyjayjo @bae4choi @haatohwa @marvelahsobx @jxhnnyfav
#ateez#ateez imagine#ateez smut#ateez imagines#ateez x reader#ateez x y/n#ateez x you#wooyoung#wooyoung x y/n#wooyoung x you#wooyoung imagine#wooyoung x reader#wooyoung smut#yunho#yunho angst#yunho x reader#yunho x you#yunho imagine#wooyoung imagines#wooyoung fanfic#yunho smut#yunho fluff#ateez scenario#wooyoung scenario#yunho scenario#wooyoung oneshot#wooyoung smut oneshot#kpop smut#ateez oneshot#ateez oneshots
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
Ateez | The Type To (Valentine's Special)
Hongjoong
would be thinking about you as he works in his studio- some lyric that comes to his mind that reminds him of you, or some specific note that makes him nostalgic
which would make him lose track of time as he recalls the first time he saw you or the time he realised he was in love with you
always smiles while bobbing his shoulders in happiness when he sees you before he greets you with a hug or a kiss
usually makes you sit real close to him or in his lap if he still has work to do
which often results in his hands travelling places
and then, of course, with a casual but hot comment he passes which makes you either a blushing mess or make the next move
when he kisses you, it's either really soft and slow with his hands cupping your face, smiles in between as he brushes his nose against yours playfully
or it's desperate and passionate, not sticking to one place, moving around and bumping into things as you make way to the nearest flat surface
so he can pin you down and do things to you
if you make sounds while he's kissing you, it only fuels him further and then it's hard to stop
and why would you when he makes you feel so wanted, like you're the only one he'll ever need?
he's really good with his tongue and teeth so uh you know how it is
his fingers will also be rhythmically tapping on your body if he's focused on one thing
every movement this guy makes serves a purpose so don't be surprised if he pins you or just takes a step back to scan you very slowly before he basically devours you
he's good at all positions-
when he's done with you, he'll want cuddles def and would pass out tired in your arms 90 percent of the times bc man spends all his stamina on you BYE
Seonghwa
he has two moods- sugar and devil
when he's in sugar mood, he's really sweet. he calls you, plans a date, tells you he loves you and spends way too much time and effort which just makes you feel overwhelmed with love in the best possible way
he'll hold your hand as you take a walk in a park or sth and he'll be caressing it subconsciously
will kiss you while you're excitedly talking about something which will make you surprised for a moment
but then again, knowing seonghwa, he's done that a few times before
inside dates are also very wholesome- you'll be watching netflix and at some point, you'll ditch the snacks and watching the movie
esp when his hands start rubbing circles on your thigh
and then he'll kiss you ever so slowly at first, trying to figure out how you're feeling about this
and when he's sure? devil mode turn on
we all know how uncontrollable his tongue is
he'll leave you breathless with his kisses. you're a moaning mess and your stomach doesn't have butterflies anymore- it's a fucking zoo down there
he'll literally just get on top of you and kiss you like there's no tomorrow
and then he's travelling down, down, down
you'll see stars, definitely
and the sounds he make? will turn you on, 100%
he'll switch being dom and sub so yeah when he's dom he's the devil
and when he's a sub, he'll make sure you feel the most confident in what you're doing
he's def the best at aftercare, making sure you're good and all
will hold you all night long and whisper things in your ears which will def make you feel like going for another round
Yunho
don't get me started-
it's just the way he sometimes looks at you- he's all laughs and jokes but you'll know it when he looks at you a certain way
and you'll be sure what he's thinking because his gaze is all hot and scanning your face and lingering on your lips before he goes for a kiss
it's soft. it makes you feel loved. and then he brings his hand to cup your face and it undoes something in you, makes you move and want to disappear in him
you just love it when his hands cup your face bc ugh who doesn't love his big hands and longass fingers? and you love it when he lets his finger curl your hair as he kisses you
if you have a good height difference, he'll get tired of leaning down and pick you up and make you laugh and put you on a table or sth so he can kiss you better
which will make you wrap your legs around him and basically straddle him
which will drive him crazy and result in more heated, passionate moments
he'll spend a good amount of time on your neck too before he does something else
and we all know what purposes his long fingers could serve-
he loves watching you as he makes a mess of you. it fuels him.
and when you're in bed? he'll make sure he takes care of you as he absolutely ruins you idk how it will work and how he balances it but he will
he's got control. he knows what he does. and he's fucking good at it
you'll never get enough of him, and you'll never get over how he can go from being a puppy to being a menace in seconds
but you love him, and you make sure he knows it through your actions, through your eyes, and that's enough for him
you also just love being in his arms, whether it's in a hug or in the bed ugh he's such a bear im gonna go cry
Yeosang
being with him is a rollercoaster ride of thinking that he's the most adorable and precious person to exist vs wanting to k-word him because he can be a menace
it would def be a love-hate relationship first- like best friends. he'll make fun of you, yes, but he'll also make sure you know you mean the world to him
and he'll show you in the most unexpected ways. it's like he knows things about you even you don't- like he'll bring you what you feel like eating or hold your hand and caress it if you're feeling anxious, or just simply kiss you
he always knows what you want and you adore that
he's the type to get shy in the most unexpected moments too
like he'll just come to your place and pin you against the wall and kiss the f out of you but then you'll make one comment on how hot that was and he'll be all (//////)
which is cute asf and turns you on so damn much
kissing him is a different experience. you're holding hands, caressing each other's hands or face as you make out, and it's always so intimate like you have all the time in the world
and it's always overflowing with love
it makes one of you stop for a few moments and rest your head on their shoulder because how did you get here? it's the best feeling ever
he'll always make sure you're participating as much as him and will need encouragement and will also constantly encourage you when you're in charge
but gosh does he know what he's doing
esp when he pins your wrists? he has strength, he knows when to use it and he knows it turns you on
he's also really good with aftercare, always knowing what you want and being there for you
and then he'll earn a smack when he makes fun of sth you did and you'll both end up laughing and teasing each other
and then the teasing will turn into sth else-
protect him at all costs.
San
choi mf san i could write a book.
okay so he's just really interesting in the most unexpected ways
he knows how to love. he's not afraid to express it. but boy, he never makes it boring. he's always down to try new stuff and ugh
don't even get me on how he's such a tease
he doesn't even realise it most of the time. it's just that he'll sometimes look at you with doe eyes and next second, he's shamelessly scanning you
which makes you pause bc he's... hot
a shameless flirt but doesn't realise it
loves picking you up and swinging you around while you're in the middle of something
always makes sure you're feeling good when you're with him. if you want to go take a walk in the middle of the night when it's snowing? cool. if you want to run in the summer heat? great. he's down.
loves cornering you both literally and metaphorically
and by that i mean he'll make you say it when you want to kiss him or do sth else with him
and by that i also mean that when he's in the mood, he's all about foreplay. he'll look at you shamelessly, bite his lips, talk in a low voice as he draws closer and closer to you until you have no choice but to give in
and when he kisses you, the first one is always so, so intimate that you'll feel like jelly
and then he's holding your waist and kissing you deeper
he'll love it when you hold on to him or lock your hands in his hair
he's always very vocal even with the pleasure sounds he makes which will turn you on
and he loves driving you to the edge with just the makeout alone before he decides to have you
he just makes you a mess, he knows all your buttons. he knows what makes you go crazy, what makes you feel good, everything.
he'll also love it if you decide to switch roles and he makes you feel the most loved, makes you feel the most confident
will rest his forehead against yours and just breathe. it makes you melt
will constantly tell you how much he loves you and how much he adores you
and he loves it when you just caress his face and memorise it. he'll do the same
now come cry with me
Mingi
he's a no shit type of guy. he loves having fun with you, but he's also very vocal about what he likes and what he doesn't
so being with him is very easy- ofc you have your ups and downs, but he makes everything feel simpler and you feel safe with him. like he's your home.
but he's also such a tease in the best possible way- like the way he scans you when he sees you for the first time in a while- gosh, he makes it so obvious how much he wants you and it drives you crazy
he'll say he doesn't like it when you tease him but y'all know he secretly loves it and it turns him on so bad
and the way he kisses? you'd think he returned from a war
he absolutely knows what he's doing with his mouth. he loves peppering kisses all over your face
and he also loves kissing your neck or shoulders, he'll spend way too much time on there and make sure he leaves marks
and his sharp nose is just the cherry on top omggg
so like when he goes down on you, it's his nose brushing that does it for you and it makes him scoff
he's a menace, he's a devil in bed. he'll be rough, he'll be calm, he'll be quick, he'll spend all night, but it always makes you feel so so good and loved and you wish that moment would never end
but sometimes, he's just a big softie and wants you to lead everything
you can tell when he wants a distraction, when he's feeling down, so you make sure you make him feel loved and wanted and he'll just hold you all night
and then he's back to being the same old mingi
the type to smile into the kiss, bite your lips and devour your mouth
he loves holding you by the waist or squeezing you in places too
and you love it when it gets messy with him, when he's everywhere and can't get enough of you
his movements also have some sort of a rhythmic sense to them
which just makes everything feel heightened and it's the best
knows what you want and will take care of you every moment so you always feel safe with him :')
Wooyoung
he's your best friend, your worst enemy, your mom, a kid you have to babysit... you get the deal
he takes care of you. he cooks for you. he solves your problems. he listens to you. he dances for you.
but he's also very demanding. and he's vocal about it. he's clingy. he wants you to hug him? he'll say it. he'll spread his arms and won't go until you hug him properly
he wants you to kiss him? you can't say that he can go ahead- he'll make you make the first move
he usually starts with a peck to your lips, and then he'll just know when it makes your heart swoop to your stomach. his gaze will change, and he'll look at your lips and then back at you-
and then he'll ask if you want more
and sometimes he'll tease you about it and get smacked before he kisses you back
but kisses with him always make your stomach act funny without fail- butterflies go rampant
you absolutely love making out with him because he's such a tease and you love that even tho you'll never admit it out loud
because that would just feed his already high ego
but oh god, when he escalates things? when he start kissing your neck and go down? you lose control
he practically worships you when he makes love to you and you're afraid you don't make him feel that loved but he'll make sure you know that what you do is enough
he'll def smack you i have a feeling he will
and he also has a degradation kink come on we all know he does
which just makes everything fun
like you're just casually sitting and you tease him or scold him and he just raises his eyebrows like ma'am say that again and you just know he's turned on
aftercare has been set to a whole new standard with him
but it won't end there. you have the whole night, and he'll make the most of it until you have to lock his arms in a hug and make him go to sleep
but he'll be whispering dirty little things in your ear and you're giggling and at some point he'll start nibbling at your ear and then- oops, you're doing it again
being with him is an adventure, and there will never be a boring moment. he's your best friend, and he makes you feel like you can do anything in the world.
Jongho
uhh lemme take a breath first
okay so everything he does has meaning. he holds your hand, he pecks your cheek, he gets you flowers or takes you out? he knows what he's doing
you're not spared from the dad jokes and they'll come at the most unexpected times but they always crack you up and he loves that
he's just someone you can trust with anything, be it something that needs to be done or something you need to talk about. he's the best listener, and you love that
and he doesn't even need to say that he loves you (even tho he tells you enough)- you just know with the way he looks at you or the small actions that would otherwise go unnoticed
but it'll take a while for him to open up and that's also something you'll wish you could do again- you love it when he reveals a new side of himself to you
esp when he kisses you. he can go from shy pecks to insane open mouthed kisses that leave you breathless
and he's strong, you can feel that in the way he moves against you, in his kisses, in the way he holds you like you'd break, in the way he haves you
his gaze? don't get me started. his gaze is so overwhelming that you can barely meet eyes with him and resort to kissing him instead
he has a thing for necks. he spends a lot of time kissing your neck, your jaw, earning moans all the time
he also has a thing for butts- he'll smack you teasingly and squeeze it as he makes love to you
but he's all about controlled movements. he knows what to do with you, how much he needs to do to extract a certain reaction out of it and you're amazed by that
but he's also easy to read and he loves it that you also know how to break him
he's all about intimacy, whether it's in casual things or during love making
he's also all about vocal assurances
and well, he's a bear. you love cuddling him. he loves cuddling you. you spend most of your time indoors doing exactly that- he might not be the biggest fan of skinship but he doesn't mind that
which is why you love pecking his cheek or lips at unexpected times and earning surprised shrieks from him which are hilarious
and they'll either turn into you chasing him as he tries to hide orrr him being immediately turned on and cornering you and picking you up effortlessly and taking you to the bed/couch and basically throwing you before he gets on top of you-
will sing you to sleep ;-;
this is the most unplanned shit i've ever done LMAO hope y'all enjoyed this ;-; </3 who else is crying in single today LOLL
#ateez x reader#ateez imagines#ateez scenarios#ateez headcanons#ateez fluff#ateez angst#ateez smut#hongjoong x reader#seonghwa x reader#yunho x reader#yeosang x reader#choi san x reader#mingi x reader#wooyoung x reader#jongho x reader#ateez reactions#hongjoong imagines#hongjoong scenarios#ateez drabbles#seonghwa scenarios#seonghwa imagines#yunho imagines#yeosang imagines#choi san scenarios#choi san fluff#wooyoung fluff#jongho fluff#mingi fluff
3K notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi!!! can I request a poly pirate ateez x reader fic? they chose another girl over her and betray her but they regret and chase her back but the reader doesn’t forgive so easily
Pirate’s Heart
Pairing: Ateez! ot8 x fem! reader
• Genre: Angst, Pirate, Mature
• Warnings: crying, misunderstanding, betrayal, choosing someone else, trusting a stranger, false accusations, lies [plz tell me if I have missed something] also oc doesn't forgive easily coz they chose someone else. Come on bfr, I’m searching for you girl.
• W.C: 5k (it’s not how I thought it to be)
Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated. I tried to put more emotions into it but still I know it’s not how I wanted. I don’t know what to add more into this.
Network: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity
Eight men laughing all around the room and a girl sulking in the corner, sitting on a wooden stool beside the youngest man among them. he pats her back and trying to hold back his laughter.
“Mina…it’s okay.”
“No! you all betrayed me yesterday and I was alone roaming around the market.”
Jongho looks over at the captain who is grinning widely across from the old wooden table when he spoke up, “we were just busy with some things of ours.”
“Things?” she whines, “you all were trying to find her. Why? She can find her way back to the ship.”
You hiss to her words and mentally scoff from outside the room. But the surprising fact is that. They followed you? You don’t think that something about you even matter to them. Maybe, they don’t care if you had been attacked by their enemy. They were only following you to keep an eye, if you are not betraying behind their back.
“and you could have flirted more.” You mutter under your breath.
You hear captain’s voice and your feet scoot closer towards the dark wooden door. Tears pooling in your eyes. When was the last time he laughed with you? Or any of them spent a little time with you?
“That’s not true. You are familiar to this place but she has never been to here.” The captain stated and Seonghwa nods slowly which made her scowl.
I shouldn’t have ever stepped to this place. Your life has become upside-down after stepping a foot on this land and then suddenly Mina stumbling in your way. You still hate this from last year when she snatched your lovers.
“still…” she whines and you cringe at her tone. Yunho got up and cups her cheek, “next time, we will go to the market with you. Promise.” He brings a grape to her lips and she happily eat it. They all cooed and laughed at her cuteness.
Their laughs pierced your heart which made the tears flow down your cheeks and so you ran away from the door---behind which lies a lot of secrets.
It sounds like you're feeling hurt or disappointed because someone you liked chose someone else over you. This is really tough to deal with. It's important to remember that everyone has their own preferences and reasons for making choices, and it doesn't necessarily reflect on your worth as a person but it's not caused by some certain person.
It's about your lovers. The eight pirates who once vowed to give you a family, the love you deserve and pledged their loyalty towards you.
But now, it’s all gone.
They have turned their back to you, never glancing at the most treasured gem of theirs---their heart.
Their Y/n.
Their only Aurora.
>>>> <<<<
In the azure expanse of the Sea, where the sun dancing upon the waves like golden fire and the salty breeze whispering secrets of the deep, there you stood upon the deck of the ship. The locks swaying with the light wind and your eyes closed, facing towards the sun.
Once where existed—a tale of love. Now, it’s all about betrayal and redemption, woven amidst the tumultuous seas and treacherous shores.
In the heart of the sea, you have always dreamed of adventure beyond the horizon, of a life filled with excitement and romance. Even if you stood in front of the danger, you had a smile adorning your face with the strong belief that you have the most powerful and fearful pirates of the sea with you and nothing can ever put you nine down.
But all the hopes are gone now.
Little did you know in your childhood that your destiny would intertwine with that of eight notorious pirates whose names echoed through the taverns and harbors of the sea --- The Ateez.
Led by their enigmatic captain, Kim Hongjoong was feared and revered in equal measure, their ship, the Blue Bird, striking fear into the hearts of merchants and sailors alike.
But beneath their fearsome exterior lay hearts yearning for something more—a love that transcended the boundaries of the sea. Your love.
It was on a moonlit night, with the stars twinkling like diamonds in the sky, when your path first crossed with that of the Ateez. As you walked along the deserted shores of Halazia, your thoughts lost in the gentle rhythm of the waves, you stumbled upon a sight that would change your life forever.
There, stranded upon the sands, lay a man---a pirate surrounded by seven other figures, his clothes torn and his face etched with pain. Without hesitation, you rushed to his side, heart racing with a mixture of fear and curiosity.
To your surprise, the man stirred, his eyes flickering open to reveal a gaze as deep and mysterious as the ocean itself. It was none other than Captain Hongjoong, his aura of danger and intrigue drawing you like a moth to a flame.
“People fear me a lot but I don’t want you to fear me. I’m not scared to lose anything but you.”
In that moment, amidst the crashing waves and the swirling mist, a connection sparked between you both—a connection that defied reason and logic, binding your fates together in ways you could never have imagined. His sea brothers, whom he gathered and grew up together with from the beginning pledged their loyalty to you.
As days turned into weeks and weeks into months, you found yourself drawn deeper into the world of the pirate Ateez, your bond with Captain and the crew growing stronger with each passing day. Seonghwa, the Quatermaster was always the one to accompany you whenever the captain was not around and the bonding grew into more intimate. His soft and comforting smile with the warmth of his skin against yours was enough for you to feel at home.
“love, we will always run to each other if we feel threatened. Your love is the strongest weapon to me.” He said and smiled down at you in his arms.
The cook who was also the head Rigger, Wooyoung was the playful menace of the crew and even though, you felt scared by others, he would be the one to grab your hand and run away to the vast fields or cuddling with each other on top, the crowsnest. Sometimes, the surgeon of the ship, Yeosang would also tag along with you both.
“I never had more fun spending time here but with you, I don’t want this to end any day.” You smiled towards the Rigger and nodded.
The surgeon planted his feet on the wood and left the rope’s grip, “I should agree too. Nothing can cure me more than your love, Y/n.”
You feared the first mate and the pilot, Yunho. His intimidating stare and the fire glinting in his eyes with a flick of curiosity to know if you were a stowaway on the ship made him distant with you but once when you risked your life for his. He became determined since that day that he would be the one in charge for your safety.
“I can risk everything to save you, pearl. You are the precious gem to me.” he cups your cheek before placing a kiss on your lips.
Mingi, the gunner was always the one to approach you with a welcoming aura but the weapons with him scared you at first. Eventually, when you spent nights with him, sharing deepest secrets, he knew your heart has been kept safe with him.
“you made me feel emotions which I didn’t know I could ever feel. Thank you, y/n.”
Jongho, the sailing master. You have watched him from afar while spending time with others but never once tried to approach him because of his cold appearance. You doubted his personality whenever you had caught a glimpse of his gummy smile. Once, when he was directing the other mates on the ship, you found out that Yeosang was also the navigator of the cabin crew. Yunho would always be with these two to ensure the perfect course of the journey.
“Jongho…you must be tired.” Your concerned voice made him smile towards you.
“never. I can’t ever be tired when I’m with you. You are my greatest strength.”
In the end, San, the striker and helmsman was the one who gave you the warmth in the ocean of coldness. His piercing eyes following each and every movement of yours around the ship was enough to feel you under watch. He was always hiding behind the darkness but one day when you risked your life for them, he stood under the spotlight to kill every individual who pointed their swords at you, even a single finger.
“even if I look back for once, I would look back at you before killing everyone who dared to point a finger.” He hugged you tighter.
He was the last one to fall in love with you but first one to accuse you. The days can’t be always be smooth and peaceful, just like the waves in the sea bed. Once, its silent then in the next moment it would be a roaring storm thrashing around.
Similarly, lurking in the shadows of your burgeoning romance was a darkness that threatened to tear you apart—a darkness in the form of another woman.
Driven by jealousy and vengeance, Mina vowed to destroy everything the Ateez held dear, starting with their heart--- you. And so, with her wiles and charms, she ensnared the affections of the eight pirates who had once pledged their love and loyalty to you.
One by one, they fell under her spell, their emotions wavering in the face of Mina's deceit. And though you fought with all her strength to reclaim their love, your efforts were in vain, for the pirates had chosen someone else—a betrayal that cut deeper than any sword.
>>>> <<<<
But, one fateful day, as you stood upon the deck of the pirate ship bound for distant lands, a familiar sight caught your eye—a merchant’s ship, its sails billowing in the wind, its bow cutting through the waves like a knife through butter.
“y/n…what are you doing?”
His voice made you flinch but still your attention on the merchant ship in distance didn’t waver. You gripped the railing tightly to fight back the weakness in front of him. his heavy boots hit against the wooden plank and the creaking sounds made shiver run down your skin.
When was the last time he called your name?
“I don’t know where she is. Go ask others.” Your reply was cold and he nodded to himself before stepping closer. As the two ships drew closer, your eyes followed the waves when you suddenly turned around and glared, “stop right there.”
He stopped in his track.
You felt a surge of emotions coursing through your veins—fear, anger, longing. But above all else, there was hope—a glimmer of hope that perhaps, just perhaps, the tides of fate had finally turned in your favour.
No one has ever dared to command anything to the captain except Seonghwa. Maybe you as well. As if by some twist of fate, today Captain has appeared before you, his gaze meeting yours with an intensity that sent shivers down your spine. You stood on your spot strong, with the fire in your eyes towards him.
"Y/n" he said, his voice a low rumble that echoed in the depths of your soul. "I am asking about you not her."
For a moment, you were speechless, your heart pounding in your chest as you struggled to comprehend the magnitude of what was happening. Could it be true? Could he still harbor feelings for you after all this time?
“because you can’t find her anywhere and thinking it’s something has to do with me.” your emotionless tone was pinching his skin. He licked his lips, staring at you with a hope to listen your sweet words. Your eyes wandered around and you felt odd. No one was in the sight and the ship was undoubtedly quiet. But when your eyes landed on the round stairs from the master cabin, you saw other seven figures descending down towards the plank where you stood with the captain.
Before you could formulate a response, Hongjoong took your hand in his, his touch sending a jolt of electricity coursing through your veins. "I know I have wronged you, y/n" he said, his eyes brimming with sincerity.
Why is he suddenly saying all these?
You snatched your hand from his grip and glared, the same look you sent towards the others when they approached near, “Why are you all here?” you again looked around, you leaned forward towards the railing to peek below, “where are the men and other workers? What’s going on?”
Seonghwa stood closer than others, “we sent them to collect all our necessary items for the journey.”
“Journey?”
“tomorrow before the dawn, we are leaving for Utopia.”
“and where is she?”
This time Wooyoung spoke up, “that’s something about which we are here to talk with you.”
“I don’t know anything about her.”
Even if you wanted to look strong yet you felt so weak under their heavy gazes. All their stares after so many months feeling so unfamiliar and strange. The last time when you had all their gazes on you was when you pointed Mina’s reason to be with you and they accused you of jealousy. They referred you as a child wanting to have their attention, being selfish with others. They said that you don’t have a little feeling towards a girl who seems like a sister.
More like an evil sister, who was there to ruin your family.
“of course you don’t know, y/n.” Wooyoung said softly but you scoffed, “then?”
“We did wrong for not believing you.” Seonghwa’s voice was soft, just a pitch higher than the whisper.
“why? She didn’t agree to sleep with you all?” you smirked, throwing a dirty look towards them.
“Y/n!” Hongjoong’s stern voice made you flinch. His clenched jaw and tight fist, the anger building inside him at your words. But you continued to fuel the fire of anger.
“do you want me to convince her for this? Just to let you know, I can’t.”
“what are you saying? Why are you thinking of us like this?” Yunho asked you but deep down, he asked it to himself as well. He knew the reasons very well. He knew you were hurt for their deeds but he thought you will understand their ends.
“really? You are asking me this. So what else do you want me to think? That tomorrow morning, when we will be in the bed of the sea and with the best opportunity, you will throw me into the waters.”
“What are you saying?” Yeosang’s low voice made you glance at him and his orbs searched for a little softness in you. The scene unfolding in front of him was so unusual. Basically, pirates should be the ones with emotionless and rough appearance but here they were asking helplessly from a mere girl.
Mere? No.
From their love. Their heart.
“where is she?” you asked again.
“in the brig.” You raised your brow at Hongjoong’s words. Why is she there? What did she do? Or are they here to take you to lock you up there? goosebumps appeared on your skin but it was hidden under the sleeves of the shirt. Your mind racing with the thought that now how has she accused you guilty this time that they all are here to escort you to the brig.
“I-I haven’t done a-anything.” Your voice broke and you turned around to face the sea.
Whenever you felt suffocated, your feet move on its own to stand at the edge of the quarter deck and inhale the scent of freedom. The village life was so harsh to you and after these pirates took you in with them for the long journey, you felt as if you have started a new life. A new dream with a new life beyond the horizon but last year, they turned their back at you. Leaving you behind all alone.
Seonghwa hugged your shaking body from behind, “hsshh love why are you scared?”
He made himself turned around with you in his hold, making you face them. You looked down to hide the falling tears of fear.
“what happened?” Hongjoong held your chin up to stare in your eyes. Your scared pupils reflecting the hurt and loneliness.
“I will serve you well, masters. But please don’t take me to the brig. I have no where else to go but please don’t end my life.” You wiggled under the oldest one’s hold but he held you tighter. He knew very well that if he lets you go, you would probably run away and won’t talk to them.
“Masters?” San was confused with your tone like others and the way you were addressing them. “why are you calling us this? And we are not taking you anywhere. We are here to…apologize.”
Your raging yet scared eyes stared at him, “apologize? For what? You have already given up on me. you all left me alone for…. For that girl. Calling me selfish because I wanted my lovers away from an outsider. Blaming me for every little mishap caused to her. Trusting the false accusations against me.”
You again tried to break free when he gripped your arms tighter, “stay still. You are not going anywhere unless we are done speaking with each other.”
“I don’t want to talk with you all.” But deep down you want to talk to them. Shout at them. You want to look at them longer, feel the warmth in their embrace. You want to feel their love for you again. If there’s still any feelings left for you.
“y/n…we didn’t give up on you for her.” Jongho spoke up and looked over his brothers. He realized how they have messed up the relationship for these past months because the new girl really lured them into trusting the lies but in the end, Yeosang really found out her real intentions behind all this.
“Yeosang found out that she befriended us to destroy us.” Mingi said and nodded along with Yeosang. The surgeon sat on the wooden drum and leaned forward, “she lied to us that she stays alone here. She has been sent from our enemy.”
“but still you all trusted her once. You all believed when she said I’m related to the captain Chan. You all even kept watch on me to see if I’m betraying you all.” You hissed and stepped forward when you felt the grip loosened around you. You glared back at him and walked towards the stool beside the boxes and sat on it. Wooyoung was standing closer to you.
Tears fell from his eyes when he saw your figure tired and lonely. They really kept themselves so busy to even take a little look at you in all these months.
“we are really sorry for that, y/n.” Hongjoong apologized and glanced at others.
“speak for yourself.” You rubbed your eyes and wiped the tears from the cheek, “I don’t think each of you is feeling the same.”
“No, it’s true. We are really sorry.” Seonghwa supported the captain’s words. Wooyoung slide down against the boxes and leaned back, “we shouldn’t have doubted you.”
Yunho folded his hands in front. Standing in front of you, looking the perfect pilot of the ship but somewhere a sense of betray reflecting from him. He shook his head, “I don’t know how we trusted her everything and didn’t believe you. I’m really sorry.”
“I know you are hurt, y/n. but please forgive us.” Yeosang stood beside Wooyoung and both of them eagerly waiting for your response.
“You all made me feel like a stowaway in my---your ship. I felt like an enemy lurking around you. You all were spending so much time with her. Your gazes were filled with love and admiration while looking at her but whenever your eyes fell on me, there was visible fire of hatred. It hurt me. I felt like to run away far from you. But I didn’t know where to.”
“This is also your ship. You are the aurora in the night sky for our journey.” San stated and smiled but it quickly disappeared when he saw your teary eyes looking back at him.
Mingi placed his elbow on top of a drum and leaned to his side, “you aren’t a stowaway. You are a part of the family. You are more than that. You are our heart, y/n.”
“didn’t you feel your heart ache while believing a liar and laughing with her despite my presence just near you?” you shot an angry look towards him.
Jongho stepped forward and stood beside the captain, “we are really guilty. Please give us a chance to prove that our love has not wavered.”
You bitterly chuckled, “Love?……pirate’s only love is their desire to sail free all around the sea with their conquered treasure.”
“And, you are our treasure, and our only desire is to be with you.” Wooyoung said it loudly, earning everyone’s attention on him. he flinched when he saw your intense gaze on him. He wanted to hold your hand run to the crows-nest and hug you tightly, promising everything to protect you and to never betray you.
“Where do you go every afternoon for these last few months?” Yunho’s question perked everyone’s ear, even yours. He noticed? Their curious gazes on you made you shift in your place.
“You don’t have to know about it.”
“y/n…please do let us know if you are in any danger.” Jongho asked you politely. You shook your head and looked to your side, avoiding their eyes. You didn’t notice when San came in front and kneeling. “Please, tell me.”
You casted a glance at him then to others before looking at your hands, “I was planning to run away with a help of a friend.”
“Run away with a friend?”
“His name is Ten. You all were busy ignoring me all these months…almost a year. He is a sailor and we met at a fortune teller shop. He offered me a helping hand to have a life on my own.”
San was shocked, “you trusted him?”
You nodded, “like you all trusted her. I have heard from others and they all were praising him. He is a good person. He listened to my stories every day, he showed me around the place, laughed with me, taught me new things……he spent time with me.” you paused and nodded to yourself before continuing, “maybe I’m selfish…I’m selfish because I want you all to myself. I felt jealous seeing you with her. Or maybe I should have open myself to others, should let myself to make more friends so that even if you think of leaving me one day. I should not feel hopeless but can continue my life ahead. Not beyond the horizon but beyond those mountains and low valleys.”
“Y/n…don’t leave us like this.” Wooyoung scooted towards you and the captain and quartermaster stepped closer, followed by others. They were surrounding you and you were sitting like a helpless one under their shadows.
“and why? How can I trust that you all will not accuse me of betraying again?”
Hongjoong glance at Seonghwa before stating, “if you leave us then we will be scattered, y/n.”
“and what about me? you all already made my feelings shattered when you all chose her over me because she proved me as a liar with some fake evidence. You all broke your own rules.”
Don’t trust a lie and never betray your family. --- their only rule.
Yeosang shook his head, “no, y/n. it won’t happen again.” Mingi nodded when agreeing with him. the scenario can’t be ever believed that the notorious group of pirates are helplessly asking forgiveness to you.
Before Yunho could speak whatever he was going to, you spoke up making him shut, “I really loved you all. When I promised not to betray you, I meant it. Even if you kill me someday, I will still have a belief that you are the only family I ever got in my life.”
“Y/n…”San whispered your name not to show his weak voice.
“Are you not leaving us, right?” Mingi asked you when you stood up.
“I don’t know but I’m going to meet him now.” You placed your fingers over the belt to feel the knife well hidden underneath it. Hongjoong held your elbow stopping you from walking further, “you are not going anywhere.”
“And you are no one to tell me anything.” You jerked off his hand.
Yunho blocked your way when you turned towards the gangway. You shot him a glare but he returned the similar gaze directed to your soul, “don’t be stubborn. We are leaving tomorrow and don’t go anywhere today. We have to deal with Mina---”
“don’t say her name in-front of me!” you grabbed his coat and clenched your jaw. His hand moved up to cup your cheek but you swatted it away. “don’t touch me.” you pushed him aside. They watched how you stumbled a little while walking down the gangway and jumped to the shore from the last step. Seonghwa signalled something towards San and the latter nodded before following behind you.
And in that moment, as the sun dipped below the horizon and the stars began to twinkle overhead, they knew that you had a choice to make—a choice between holding onto the pain of the betrayal or embracing the promise of a future filled with love and redemption.
You stopped in your track before entering the market, heart soaring with the knowledge that true love conquers all—even the darkest depths of the sea. And your true love really pulled them towards you again.
For in the end, it is not the storms or the tempests that define their journey, but rather the unwavering belief that no matter how far they may drift apart, they will always find their way back to each other, guided by the light of love that burns eternal in the darkness. And so, as the waves carry them toward new horizons and unknown shores, embark on a voyage of discovery—one filled with adventure, passion, and the promise of a love that will endure for all eternity.
Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @hwanring @sanwifesstuff @kiwiisnthereoops @kiwiraccoon @hyuukah @kazscara @aceofspadesbiofalltrades @nvdhrzn [open!]
#cultofdionysusnet#kvanity#ateez#ateez x reader#ateez imagines#ateez scenarios#ateez fanfic#ateez au#ateez pirate au#pirate ateez#seonghwa x reader#hongjoong x reader#yunho x reader#yeosang x reader#san x reader#mingi x reader#wooyoung x reader#jongho x reader#ateez ff#ateez angst#ateez poly#poly ateez#poly ateez x reader
411 notes
·
View notes
Text
Someone out there...
Part: 4 {Serieslist}
Iln the window|
Pairing: bunny!hybrid!jungkookxhuman!readerxbunny!hybrid!wooyoung
Boy groups involved: BTS & ATEEZ
Genre: angst, fluff, smut, neighbour au, hybrid au.
Summary: the two bunny hybrids were terrified of the cruel world. Will they be able to live their life?
Warnings: mentions of abuse, mention of vomit, mention of anxiety, shit talking.
Word count: 3k+
BTS and ATEEZ masterlist
Masterpost
Do not repost, piz
How would it feel if someday you woke up and found yourself trapped in a room with mould creeping up the walls and water soaking the ceiling? How would it feel if someone told you that for the rest of your life, you are only going to obey and not say no?
It will suck, right? You will be depressed and devastated. This will kill the whole purpose of life if you only obeyed and never lived the way you wanted to. Your life would become the darkest part of your existence. The hell would grow in you slowly and finally when it couldn't grow more, it would eat you hollow and leave your body to burn under the hottest sun.
These were the first thoughts when you woke up on a Monday morning. The gloominess inside your heart kept you in bed for a couple of hours. Your head pounded thinking about the hybrids next door.
Their almost dead-looking bodies sent shivers down your spine. All you wanted to do was to hug them and bring them into your house to protect them from any evil eyes.
But could you do that?
No.
They didn't belong to you. And your mind didn't dare to think about having a hybrid. You were lonely, yes. But that didn't mean that you were mentally prepared for a hybrid or two.
Past haunts you. Whatever happened back then, you didn't want it to repeat. As happy as everything seemed, it wasn't picture perfect. To have that, you would do whatever but can anybody forget their past just like that? No. No one can forget their past just like that.
The bumpy roads of life and, if it exists, fate, were too deep and backbreaking. You could barely walk on it and thinking about the future, you were already giving up on that road. There was no way that you could heal or fix it. You had nothing left with you to even begin filling those bumps.
Sighing, you sat up and looked at the clock. It indicated 7:08 AM. Your office started at 9:15. You got out of bed to at least not get late for once. Your feet, instead of the bathroom, took you to the window that faced the hybrid's house.
There was no one by the window of the attic. Deep down you wished to see at least any of the hybrids, maybe both, just to see if they were fine. But when you saw nothing, you sighed and observed the surroundings.
The house looked so full and happy before you paid them a visit but now when you look at it, it looks like it’s holding many deep and dirty secrets, the secrets that might make you want to wash your whole self with commercial bleach.
You thought about the scenarios that might be true for the people and hybrids living there. There were so many and you wished that you were narrowly judging the cover of the book and that they are actually very happy and stable in their little bubble. Maybe you were being dramatic after watching all of those detectives and thriller shows at night or with Hongjoong and Namjoon.
If that were the case, you would be the happiest.
Oblivious, you didn't realize that Jungkook was observing you through the window in the kitchen while he was doing the dishes.
He felt someone. He felt that someone was carrying a heavy heart and the burden was unbearable, he had the worst-case scenario happening to himself still, but for someone who hasn't been a slave, this pain felt piercing in its own way.
Who is he kidding? Even he knows that pain can be equally killing even if the circumstances are different.
Jungkook felt that after he woke up. The burden. He felt hurt and in need of some comfort. He turned around and hugged the bunny form of Wooyoung. It helped.
Wooyoung was weak. He couldn't feel other people other than Jungkook’s. He always called it the lovers’ thread. But today, he whined. Not because of his illness but because he was feeling someone else's feelings. That someone was definitely not Jungkook, Wooyoung would know if it was.
Jungkook was worried for Wooyoung but soon realized that he himself wasn't the only one who felt the burden of someone. He was surprised though. It was as if he was going through that pain. Just like he felt Wooyoung's feelings. But he soon stopped thinking about this part. Avoiding this fact just so he wasn't busy thinking about it.
Now, he was looking at you looking at the attic. He wondered if you were looking for someone or what was going on in your mind.
…
Soon you left the balcony and got ready for the day. You heated some leftovers and sat down. Your phone rang next to you showing your mother's name on it. You had no will to talk to anyone this morning. Your usual loud self in the morning was numb.
After the fifth ring, you picked it up. “Hello?”
“Ah, y/n. You sound so withered. Is everything alright?” your mother worried.
“Mom, how could you tell that from just hello?” you mumbled.
“I'm your mother… Even your breath can tell me if you are okay or not. Now tell me what happened?” she knew your every single nerve like the back of her hand.
“Nothing, I woke up feeling a bit off… Everything is alright,” you reassured.
Your mother sighed on the other end before speaking, “listen… I won't force you to tell me anything because I know that will only make you annoyed but simply remember that you can go on and on about some useless shit, I would still listen. Okay?”
You smiled for the first time that morning. Your mother had no shame in using bold words and this wasn't even as bad. “I'll keep that in mind.”
“Good girl. Now don't get late for work. And eat and drink proper meals!” she said.
“I won't get late and will eat and drink properly. Have a good day, mom.”
“You too, young lady,” you chuckled at her and dismissed the call.
She was adorable. The generation gap was there but she always tried to understand your point of view and never said something like “I have been through your age and I know how it is and you are a fool to feel that way” or whatever.
She understood that you had it differently and that they were not the same people. She never missed a chance to understand your generation better and tried her best to be at least a helpful mother. This quality of hers maintained the best relationship between you and her. She acted like a friend and was always ready to learn new things and never once she acted like she knew everything.
You smiled thinking about her. “I think I won a jackpot that I call Mother.”
…
The day stretched longer than anticipated. The work kept on loading more and more, testing your patience.
Your boss kept on dumping files on files at your desk even after the working hours got over. “You need to know that sometimes you gotta work more than working hours too,” was what he said after seeing your obvious pout.
The things you had to do for making a luxurious living. You sighed.
You turned your car into your street and passed in front of the Kims and stopped in your driveway. You took your purse and some files that you were supposed to work on before going to bed.
No joke but living on your own was the hardest, especially while working side by side. Because now you had to do some chores and extra work that your manager let you bring home. You wished you could bring your mother here but she had her own work to look after and your father.
You sighed for the millionth time and finally got out of the car. You loved your car and were about to go into your home when someone called your name.
“Y/n!” you saw Bina jogging towards you.
You mentally sighed once again, having no energy to face her button still greeted her, “Mrs Kim! How can I help you?”
“Oh no, no. I don't need any help. I just saw you coming back through the window and we were going to have dinner. You made us such delicious sweets so we thought that we should call you for dinner. I'm pretty sure you must be hungry,” she smiled widely.
“A-ah, no need for that Mrs Kim. I'm fine. I'll just make something,” you kindly declined the offer.
Bina tsked, “you are going to make something first and then eat, it takes too much time. The dinner is ready. Don't be shy, we all are going to eat the same food.”
You thought about it for a second, “okay… I'll just get freshen up and be there in five minutes.”
She smiled and patted your shoulder and went back to her house.
Within five minutes, you quickly washed your face and changed into a white loose t-shirt and black boxer shorts.
Now you were sitting with Bina and Dal. The food was being served by the adorable bunny hybrids. It was traditional Korean food, something you haven't had in a long time. You appreciated the efforts. It looked so delicious. You picked your chopsticks and ate the food.
“Wah! That is so good! Wow! Reminds me of home,” you said after stuffing your mouth the most you could.
The couple chuckled and ate their food. Jungkook and Wooyoung kept on serving everyone. After they served, they quietly stood by the wall and waited for you all to finish the food.
They cleared the table later on and brought dessert. Everything tasted way beyond delicious. Even five-star restaurants couldn't even beat the food that they made. “Jungkook, Wooyoung, thank you for serving and making delicious food! I appreciate it,” you said and slightly bowed to them.
They both stood there, frozen. No one has ever done that to them. It felt nice and appreciated.
“Go and eat your dinner,” Dal sternly said.
You saw them with tiny bowls of rice that were smaller than their hands. They were scurrying down the hallway. You frowned deeply and looked at the couple who was unbothered.
“That’s it? They won’t eat anything else?” You asked.
Bina looked up at you and smiled, “what do you mean?” she asked with a scary smirk.
“Them,” you pointed to where the hybrids went. “They just took small bowls of rice.”
“Ah, no worries! That’s their diet. They will be fine. Don’t you agree? They shouldn’t eat too much, right? They will get lazy,” her voice sounded taunting and yet so soft. It sent shivers down your spine.
‘This is your chance to gain their trust around the hybrids, y/n. Don’t let it go!’ Your inner voice screamed.
You chuckled, awkwardly, “we used to have a hybrid when I was younger. You are right, they should eat that much. It’s enough,” you stretched the last word. “We fed that much too! Maybe a tiny bit bigger bowl but yeah, nonetheless, same…”
Jungkook and Wooyoung heard you talking. They thought that maybe you were a bit better when you thanked them for the food but guess they were wrong. You were just like other humans. The hybrids felt bad for the hybrid that you had when you were younger.
Apart from all of this, Jungkook and Wooyoung felt the same pain and heaviness that they felt in the morning. They looked at each other but continued eating their food. Wooyoung felt like crying. This pain was too much for him. They both felt like they were suffocating.
“Why is it happening?” Wooyoung sniffed.
Jungkook rested his arm around Wooyoung and brought him to his chest and patted his back, “it will be okay soon, yeah? Don’t think about it and eat,” he kissed the younger’s forehead.
“Right?!” Bina beamed. “They don’t deserve much. They should just serve us and know their damn place. They can be so fucking ungrateful,” she scoffed.
Every single word that came out of her mouth felt like a dagger piercing through your heart again and again. She was evil and cruel. How could she think like that? Didn’t she have any heart? You wanted to shake her by her shoulder and shout at her and slap the shit out of her.
“These motherfuckers are just a burden on us,” Dal scoffed.
‘Then why do you have them?’ You thought while imagining strangling him.
“True!” You acted. “Don’t let them get to you…” you clenched your fist. “They don’t deserve it. They live here, that should be enough,” you were sure your palm was bleeding because of the tightness of the fist.
“Ah! You are better than we thought! It’s good to have someone who thinks like us,” Bina’a eyes sparkled. You were hating more and more. Her ugly personality made you want to puke in her artificial hair.
“I know,” you squeezed her hand. But you couldn’t bear it anymore. Your heart was aching and was trying to find a way out of your body through tears, “you know what? I have some work to do… I’m gonna leave now. If you need any help in future, I’m just next door,” you walked but turned around. “How many times do they eat in a day?”
Bina looked at you, “two… Morning and night,” she said.
“Perfect for the… toys.”
…
You busted into your house and ran towards the bathroom. Hunching over the toilet seat, you vomited everything out.
The words that came out of your mouth at the Kims weren't yours. You loathe yourself for saying every single thing. And knowing that the hybrids must have heard you, it broke your heart. Hurting them wasn't what you wanted but you needed to know about them. And you were quite surprised that they talked to you so easily.
Another reflex of acid was forced out of you while thinking about it.
How could they? Why do they make such pretty hybrids suffer? What was their fault?
Was it just being born as a hybrid? Or was it because they were easy to control and hurt?
After cleaning up, you stepped out of the bathroom and your vision fell on a picture that was hanging on the wall. The pretty smiling face next to yours made your guts churn again. Why did you say all of that?
“I'm sorry,” you sobbed. “I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry,” you whispered while crying and fell to your knees. “What did they do? Why are they living like this? Why are they not being loved?”
The air around you felt suffocating. It felt like your own angel self was choking you to death. You said a few things and felt like dying. But Dal and Bina fucking abused them but were living the best life.
Where they ate full-course meals, the hybrids only chewed on almost two spoons of rice. Where they dressed elegantly, the hybrids wore rags of clothes. Where they slept peacefully, the hybrids survived.
…
Wooyoung and Jungkook had finished their rice and were getting ready for bed. They were hurt by your words and the fact that you agreed with all the abuse and that they deserved it. But the feeling… Suffocation, it wasn't getting any better. It wrapped around them like plastic wrap.
Wooyoung was in his bunny form and started making noises. He felt it too. Jungkook quickly picked him up and sat him in his lap. His big hands caressed Wooyoung’s bunny body. He tried to comfort him through this. “Wooyoung-ah,” he whispered. “I know, it hurts. Please, baby, don't cry. It hurts me.”
Feeling all this suffocation, he brought the bunny to the window closest to them. It happened to face your house. He stood there with the bunny in his hand, caressing him gently all the while. He saw that behind the closed sheer curtains, you were kneeling on the floor and holding your head.
He stood there and kept on seeing. The pain he felt kept on growing and growing. And then saw you stumbling towards your balcony.
…
The pressure was too much to take, you barely walked towards the window and opened it. There you saw him again. This time the street light made his face visible. The pain was painting his features. The dark circles under his eyes. He had something in his arms. It was Wooyoung in his bunny form. It looked like the bunny was looking at you along with Jungkook.
Tears filled the brim of your eyes and flowed down your cheeks. You just looked at them as they looked at you. “Sorry, sorry, sorry…” you repeated again and again.
Jungkook saw your swelling face. The smeared tears were shining on your face. He saw how you froze when you saw him. He saw how your eyes fell on the creature in his arms. He saw how fresh tears pooled in your eyes and slipped out. Everything seemed broken about you.
The realization hit him like a train at that moment when he could hear your repeated “sorry”.
The suffocation. The pain. The anxiety. It was all that you were feeling. Wooyoung and he felt what you felt. At that moment, he forgot all the hate he carried for humans and was worried for you.
They could only feel you but they knew that you had it worse.
He forgot his pain and thought about you.
You were not as depressed. You were not abused like the two bunnies in the window. But at that moment it felt like you were going insane. Even Wooyoung settled down and saw your dishevelled look. But still, they both let their hate overpower their emotions.
Wooyoung jumped out of his Hyung's hold and hopped on their bed and turned into human form. “Hyung, I don't trust her…” he stated when Jungkook closed the window and sat next to him and sighed.
“Me neither…”
.....
Sanaa's note:
The behaviour of all the characters is visualized.
Taglist:
@veneziamadness @cheline @sansmilkbread @jayb17 @constantlydelulusional @8tinytings @tea4sykes ; @jhmylove @itzsavage07 ; @acciocriativity
*lemme know if you wanna be added to the permanent or specific taglist*
*original picture is not mine, I just edited it*
#ateez#bts#ateez fluff#bts fluff#ateez angst#bts angst#ateez smut#bts smut#ateez wooyoung#bts jungkook#bts jungguk#ateez wooyoung angst#ateez wooyoung fluff#ateez wooyoung smut#bts jeongguk#jeon jungkook#jungkook fluff#jungkook fic#jungkook angst#jungkook smut#bts fic#ateez imagines#ateez fic#bts imagines#bts hybrid au#ateez hybrid#jungkook hybrid au#jungkook hybrid smut#jungkook hybrid angst#wooyoung hybrid
60 notes
·
View notes
Text
drunk texting bff!Ateez and accidentally confessing you're into them
author: bvidzsoo
pairing: ot8 x reader
tw: nsfw
genre: smau, reactions, best friend to lovers!au
a/n: another random one lol kill me atp, these were so not supposed to be nsfw idk what happened, help. perhaps a few of these are...strong, if you know what i mean, lol. don't mind me, enjoy!
⚞ Masterlist ⚟
#bvidzsoo#cromernet#ateez fake texts#ateez#ateez ot8#ateez smau#ateez scenarios#ateez headcanons#ateez drabbles#ateez imagines#ateez oneshot#ateez fluff#ateez smut#ateez angst#ateez fanfic#ateez crack#ateez x reader#hongjoong x reader#seonghwa x reader#yunho x reader#yeosang x reader#san x reader#mingi x reader#wooyoung x reader#jongho x reader
897 notes
·
View notes
Text
ateez as royals who fall for you (maknae line)
read hyung line here
genre: royalty!ateez x fem!reader, fluff, angst, smut, crack, a brainrot and smutfest of royal tropes
length: 11.3k
c/w: very nsfw scenes - mdni, explicit language (dirty talk, swearing, insults), death, violence, blood & injuries, weapons, heavy & mature themes (sex work, murder, assassination, execution, mentions of misogyny)
a/n: as much as writing royals was tricky, it's kind of 🤢 sad 🤢 to see this au end. that being said nobody ask me for a pt 2 pls i need to recover from the trauma LMAOO and as always, huge thank you to the queen of royal au's herself @sorryimananti-romantic for helping me finish the fic and for teaching me how to make moodboards using something that is *not* word doc :')
san
pov: you're forbidden lovers
“shh,” san hushes you with a teasing curl of his fingers that are buried inside you. “wouldn’t want everyone outside to know what a dirty little slut the princess is, do you?”
his other hand covers your mouth, stifling the breathy moans and desperate whines that escape your lips as you sit in between his legs, naked and pressed back to lean against his chest
there is the sound of water splashing over the edge of the bathtub when san hooks his feet around your inner ankles so that he can spread your legs wider for him
he presses the palm of his hand harshly against your clit and your back arches with a muffled worship of his name
“or maybe you like that,” he teases “you like the idea of people knowing how good i make you feel with my fingers”
san removes his hand from your mouth and lowers it to pinch your nipple, smirking against your neck as you babble incoherently
he coos as he adds yet another finger into you, “imagine that, everyone knows you as the princess who loves being fucked dumb. and by one of her servants, no less”
all caution is thrown to wind and you drop your head back to lean against his shoulder, mouth lolling open with unrestrained pleads for more, more, faster as he angles his fingers to hit that sweet spot inside of you
“cum, princess” he demands
you grip bruises onto san’s thighs and arms when the pace of his fingers doesn’t relent even after your orgasm has washed over you
his arms tighten around you as his thighs flex to keep you still in his hold
you let out a choked sob from the overstimulation, teetering between pain and pleasure
“give me one more, i know you can do it,” he coaxes
the hand that has been fondling your breasts snakes down to rub your clit
with his fingers knuckle-deep inside of your pussy and his other hand playing relentlessly with your sensitive clit, the scale tips over and your vision blurs as another wave of pleasure hits you, more intense than the first one
“princess?” and then a knock. “are you okay?”
san slowly draws out the remainder of your orgasm with lazy thrusts of his finger into you
you just know he’s enjoying himself when you have to hide the shakiness in your voice to answer back to your maid outside, “everything’s fine. i’ll be done soon”
“soon?” san smirks, lifting you up by the waist to align your folds with his swollen cock. “then we better make this quick”
because you and san do not have the luxury of time, much less the luxury of love
he isn’t just another one of the numerous servants who serve you
he is everything to you despite how taboo it is for a princess and servant to love each other
his insignificance within the palace makes it much easier for him to slip away; for nobody to take notice
but at the same time, his insignificance is the whole reason why you two must be secretive in the first place
you make sure san has safely snuck out of the bathroom before you finally exit the bathtub and stand on unsteady legs
you allow your maids to come in and help you into the elaborate attire you are to wear for the afternoon
your parents have informed you that you are going to have visitors, thus requiring you to look your best
without much time left until the appointed meeting due to your…escapade, you make your way to the great hall, catching a glimpse of san’s dimpled smile from amongst the other body servants and waiting staff in the room
you have only just settled into your seat next to the king and queen when the guard outside the doors announces the arrival of your guests - the monarchs from the neodonian kingdom
schooling your expression to one of neutrality, you watch as they enter
and then you realise it isn’t just the neodonian king and queen who have come to visit
but the prince as well
he is undeniably handsome and pleasing to the eye with his sleekly gelled hair, chiseled features and tall, sturdy build
the young prince catches you looking at him and breaks out into a friendly smile and-
oh
he has dimples too
the king garners everyone’s attention with a clear of his throat, before he welcomes the monarchs
prince jaehyun, you learn his name is
“after much discussion between ourselves and king jeong and queen jeong, we are pleased to announce our desire for closer relations between our kingdoms,” your father starts, booming voice resounding within the hall
you can’t stop yourself from looking over at him as he speaks with purpose, a strange niggling feeling starting to twist your stomach
the tight smile that your mother passes you from your father’s other side does little to settle your nerves
“as such,” the king continues, “we shall look forward to the engagement between my daughter and prince jaehyun”
there is a roaring sound in your ears, as if you have been pushed to stand under a raging waterfall
engagement
the engagement
you
prince jaehyun
the engagement between you and prince jaehyun
it takes everything in your body not to bolt up from your seat
your hands grip the armrests of your seat with a grasp so tight you are certain you will leave a permanent imprint of your agony
instead, you look around frantically for the one person your instincts are screaming for
where is san?
you are afraid to see how much this is going to hurt him
you are desperate to tell him that you had no idea about this
you are aching to press confessions of love and reassurance against his lips
but just like the insignificance of his status, san is nowhere to be seen
over the two years that you and san have been in your secret relationship, he has gained extensive knowledge of which particular tasks allow him a greater chance of seeing you, which corridors reach you the quickest, and which times during your schedule you have a break
never would you have thought he would use this knowledge to avoid you
it continues like that for the weeks following the announcement
you have no choice but to spend time with your future fiance when your father tells you very clearly to “ensure the prince feels at home”
prince jaehyun is warm and you find yourself getting along with him like you two are friends, but that is it - there are no sparks brighter than friendship
when you spend time with him, you cannot help but compare him to san; san would’ve said this, san would’ve done that, san, san, san
jaehyun engages you in conversation, easily filling in the gaps and lulls with little comments here and there, equipped with a charming laugh and deep dimples
but it only reminds you of san’s dimples and crescent eyes when you two would race through corridors, fingers tightly interwoven as you both run away to a secluded area with hushed giggles
jaehyun points out that neither of you like mushrooms during a dinner and helps nudge the servings on both of your plates to one side
the smile as you say “thank you” does not fully grace your lips because you think about san, who boasts that he will eat all the mushrooms in the world so that you never have to lay eyes on one ever again
jaehyun offers a soft yet sturdy hand to help you down the stairs or when he notices you are walking in heels across an uneven surface
your body recalls san’s rough, calloused hands that leave a trail of goosebumps wherever they touch your bare skin as he worships your body all night long
jaehyun is handsome and he is kind, but he is not san
the night before the king officially announces your engagement with prince jaehyun arrives
and still, you have not had a moment alone with san since he disappeared during that first announcement in the great hall
hurt and longing consume you to the very core
some days it is manageable, a concealed yet incessant thought, like a sticker stuck to the sole of your shoe
other days it wraps around your soul completely like a constrictor tightening as it slowly squeezes the life out of its prey
but you know that you cannot be selfish
what you feel, san feels with an intensity multiplied several times
after all, you are not the one who must stand in the shadows as the love of your life becomes engaged to somebody else, powerless to do anything but watch and poison your own smile with lies
you are lying on your bed when a quick, sharp knock sounds on your bedroom doors
you make no move to acknowledge your visitor, having told your maids very clearly you did not want to be disturbed tonight
your last night as yourself before you become prince jaehyun’s fiance
but then the knocks come a little more urgent, a little more frantic, just like your heartbeat does as it starts to speed up in anticipation
you hold your breath as you hurry to pull open the doors-
and there he is
“san-”
he swallows the rest of your words in a desperate kiss, his hands coming up to cradle your jaw as he walks you backwards so that he can step into your room
he tilts your head and slots his lips against yours again while he nudges your door closed with his foot
it isn’t until you let out a whine as his tongue swipes over your bottom lip that he pulls back to finally look at you, both of his thumbs caressing your cheekbones
you grip the front of his linen shirt, afraid that he will disappear as soon as you let go
“san, i- i had no idea, i didn’t agree to any of this”
he shushes you gently, a painful smile adorning his handsome face
“i know. i know, so please don’t cry, love,” he murmurs softly
you don’t even realise the weeks of suppressed emotions have started making their way down your face in salty trails until san uses the back of his fingers to tenderly brush them away
“i’m getting engaged tomorrow, san,” your voice breaks as reality settles in
you are so afraid
you are so lost
above all, you are so in love with san
“i know,” he reassures again, “but until tomorrow, you are still mine”
and so you spend your last night together
time has always been precious; conversations, kisses and touches rushed and with fervour
but tonight, san takes his time with you
he lays on your bed with you cradled on top of him, limbs tangled together as he savours the taste of your lips against his
he turns you onto your back as he slowly undresses you, leaving tattoos of his love each time he bares another part of your body
he pleasures you with his fingers whilst whispering into your ears, creating a harmony with his praises and the melodious moans that leave your lips
and as he brings you both to your highs numerous times throughout the night like an ingrained dance routine, it is accompanied with confessions of i love you
san holds you against his chest under your blankets so tightly that you cannot tell where your body ends and his body starts
before you drift off, safe and protected in his arms, he murmurs against your temple, “no matter what happens tomorrow, no matter what happens in the future, my heart will always be yours”
“as will mine”
you wake up the next morning to an empty bed and an equally empty heart
restless and drowning in a mix of emotions, you pace the empty corridors of the guest bedchambers
which is where jaehyun finds you as he exits his room
he is surprised but is quick to greet you kindly, “good morning, princess. what are you doing here?”
you pause mid-step
what are you doing?
“prince jaehyun,” you let the words come out of you before you can regret them. “can we talk for a moment?”
he nods, entering his room again as he pulls the door open wider for you to follow
jaehyun closes the door and then offers you a seat on his sofa, before pulling up his own chair and settling a respectful distance away from you
“i hope you don’t feel uncomfortable in my room,” he explains, “i thought that we would be less likely to be disturbed in here…considering most people know of our engagement today”
“actually, i wanted to talk to you about that”
“go on,” he encourages you with a dimpled smile
you take a deep breath
“i’m sorry,” you blurt out
and then you are admitting to the prince that he is lovely and charming and caring, but you just don’t see it working out with him
you don’t want to get engaged with him
because your heart already belongs to somebody else
“good”
“i’m so sorry, i should have been honest with you from the start but- wait, what?” you look up from where you have been nervously picking at your cuticles
jaehyun is smiling at you - a genuine smile that you did not know he had
“i’m actually relieved to hear that, princess,” he admits. “because i…also have someone that i love back home”
and for the first time, you and jaehyun truly see each other in the same light
“who is it?” he asks
“his name is san,” and then you add on, “he has dimples just like you do”
you ask him the same question
you see the way jaehyun’s expression softens with love from just the mere thought of the other
it makes you wonder whether you have the same look on your face when you mention san
jaehyun jokes, “want to be the one who tells your father we’re calling off the engagement? i don’t fancy getting executed today”
but despite what he says, mere hours later, when you are both standing in the great hall before your parents - the kings and queens of both your kingdoms - he is the one to speak up
“your majesty, we have decided to part ways peacefully and would not like to proceed with the engagement. our kingdom will always be your ally, regardless of marital relations or not”
“what?” you see veins starting to appear across the king’s forehead as he tries to maintain his temper, but the queen and the jeong monarchs seem to be taking the news much better
disappointed, perhaps, but understanding
the queen leans closer to remind the king that they had all agreed to this engagement on the terms that the decision would ultimately be yours and jaehyun’s
you suddenly speak up because this may be the only time you have the courage to
“i have one more thing to say,” you declare. “i revoke my noble status and thus declare nullified all the privileges, rules and traditions that come with nobility. i have someone i love and i wish to marry them as myself, not as the kingdom’s princess”
the king roars furiously, “that is enough! leave!” and he slams his hand against the throne’s armrest
shocked and betrayed by your father’s reaction, you rush out of the great hall with tears welling in your eyes
only to run straight into the waiting arms of san
“oh, princess,” he murmurs against the crown of your head as he engulfs you in his embrace
he doesn’t have to say anything for you to realise that he has heard the whole conversation
but you do not care about anything anymore
you are where you want to be, held by who you want to be with
“how are you here?” you sniffle
“jaehyun approached me earlier. i thought i was going to get beat up,” san’s attempt to make you smile is successful
when you lift your head up to look at him, you realise his eyes are wet as well
then you feel his body stiffen as his eyes shift to focus on something behind you
someone
he immediately steps away from you, bowing deeply as he greets the queen
you turn around to see her face adorning an endearing smile
“it’s fine, sannie,” she says, and you are not sure whether you and san are more surprised by the fact that she knows him by name or by the affectionate nickname she has used
“i’ll, uh, leave you two to talk,” he flusters
she thanks him with a teasing remark, “i won’t keep her away from you for very long”
san waits further down the corridor, back turned to give you two a moment of privacy
and then she is stroking your hair affectionately
“i am so proud of you. you’ve grown up so well and you are so brave,” she says
you don’t understand
you ask, “why aren’t you angry?”
“oh, baby,” she fondly runs her fingers through your hair, just like she used to when you were younger. “before my duties as the queen to my people, i am the mother to my daughter. i love you and all i want is for you to be happy”
your lips tremble with emotion as your mother pulls you into a hug
“does sannie make you happy, dear?”
you nod, “the happiest”
“then that is all i want. now go,” she takes a hold of your shoulders and gently turns you in the direction of san. “i’ll talk to your father”
with one last encouraging squeeze, you race down the corridor towards san
he hears your footsteps and has already turned around with open arms waiting to catch you
you hear him let out an oomph! with how hard you throw yourself into him, but he is then swaying your bodies side to side
san pulls back slightly with an incredulous look. “does this mean we can be together? together together?”
“i goddamn hope so because i gave up my princess privileges for you. no more carriages, no more assorted sweet delicacies, no more daily massages-” you fold down your fingers as you continue listing things off
he cuts you off with a tickle to your sides as he says, “that’s easy to sort out”
“first, you’ll still be my princess,” he unfurls one of your fingers so it stands upright again
“second, i’ll carry you myself so that you never need to use your feet again,” he unfurls another finger
“i’ll give you a treat whenever you want,” he kisses your lips, nibbling on your bottom lip with a teasing tug
“and, dear princess,” he pulls you flush against his body and you have to steady yourself on his chest to avoid tripping over, “i can give you hourly massages…”
smirking, he starts to lower his head to suck pretty marks onto your neck as he whispers in a low voice, “...if you can keep up”
mingi
pov: you're the prince's maid
for what you are about to do, you could very well be executed should somebody catch you
but desperate times call for desperate measures
and there’s no guarantee that you and all the other staff will not be executed anyway…
not with what has just happened in the palace
you push the door closed behind you with a soft click, using the brief changeover of guards to slip inside the bedroom of the youngest prince, unnoticed
you call out softly but urgently, “prince mingi”
when you hear him groggily murmur, starting to bubble towards the surface of consciousness, you dare to give his shoulder a rough shake
“prince mingi, please wake up”
his eyes flutter open, confusion starting to clear the fogginess in his head as he struggles to comprehend the sight of your face hovering inches from his, deep into the hours of the night
“w-what’s going on?” he clears his husky voice, “are you okay?”
you wish you could reach out and smooth the wrinkles of concern from his forehead
reassure him that everything will be okay until he falls back asleep
but there is no time
“the crown prince is dead and we must leave. now.”
the effect is immediate, like you have just driven a knife into his chest
although you suppose it must not feel very different for prince mingi right now
“the crown prince is d-” the word tastes vile on his tongue, so he asks after his second oldest brother instead. “what about prince eun?”
you must drive the knife into him once more
“he was the one who murdered the crown prince, but he has framed you for the murder. there is no time, prince mingi, we must leave now”
“the court will find me innocent,” yet he lets you tug him out of his bed
you hastily help prince mingi into a dark brown robe while you shake your head, “not when your inscribed sword is currently covered in the crown prince’s blood. we do not know who is secretly working for prince eun. until we know for sure, we do not stand a chance of clearing your name”
he knows that you’re right, even if his heart is hoping that you are wrong
the prince slides his hand into the gap between his bed and wall, pulling out a spare sword and wrapping the belt around his waist
eyes sweeping across his chamber one final time, he locks eyes with you grimly before turning to flee
you follow the prince through a back passageway - it’s not entirely a secret and it won’t be long before the royal guards come for the prince, discover his empty bedroom and give chase
but it is long enough to give you two a head start
he helps you up onto the back of his personal horse before he swings himself up easily onto the saddle behind you
with a nudge of his feet, the prince sends the horse into a gallop
you startle with a yelp, having never ridden a horse before, much less one at this pace
prince mingi presses himself a little closer to you and slots his chest against your back as he leans forward to guide your hands to hold the reins with his
“here,” he murmurs, “just follow me”
he shifts one hand to settle on your waist, guiding your body into a comfortable rhythm that dances in sync with the horse’s movements and his own
when he’s sure you’ve gotten the hang of it, the prince places his hand back on the reins, yet he stays close, keeping you safely encased within his arms to prevent you from falling off
you’re not sure how long you two ride for
but at some point the prince slows the horse to a canter
with the slower sway of the steed, the steady clack of hooves against the forest floor, and the warmth of the prince around you, you drift off to his whispered, “sleep, i’ve got you”
you wake up to find yourself on a scratchy pile of leaves
the events of last night piece themselves together when you spot prince mingi, still adorning his deep blue silk pajamas, leaning against a tree a few feet away
it would have been a sight to see if not for the fact that-
“what are we going to do now?” you sit up, and the prince’s robe, you now register, falls from around your body
the prince gives you a warm smile as you rub the sleep from your eyes with fisted hands
“we’ll head into halsburg. the town is small enough the news should not have traveled that far yet. we’ll replenish some supplies and go from there”
it’s unspoken
the fact that there is no solid plan from there
even if the two of you have managed to escape the royal guards, for how long can you two run?
plus, it will be impossibly difficult to find evidence while on the run, when the answers are within the castle walls themselves
but you push those thoughts aside as you two enter halsburg, the prince’s hood pulled up over his face
you do the bulk of the purchases, less likely to be recognised by the townspeople
it’s mainly food and water for yourself, the prince, and his horse, and a simple tunic to replace his royal pajamas - something you have been teasing him about since you woke up
later that night, hours away from the outskirts of halsburg, you two settle for a couple hours of rest
a small fire crackles away to the song of the cicadas, an occasional pop as the licks of flames cast shadows across your faces
you glance at the prince sitting across from you, who is idly fiddling with his pajama top
specifically, the royal crest of the song family embroidered onto its front pocket
your heart clenches painfully, knowing the death of a family member is hard enough to process without the additional weight of being framed for murder, much less by your own brother who is the real culprit
“prince mingi…” you start, voice low
he glances up at you, eyes softening as he curves his lips up into a small smile, “i’m okay.”
you hesitate for a split second before letting the clench in your gut pull you to your feet, and you shuffle to settle back down in front of the fire, except this time beside the prince
all the while his eyes never leave you, not even when you nudge his shoulder softly and say,
“you don’t have to be strong. not in front of me…”
and he knows
because despite the differences in your social statuses, you are the person he trusts the most
you, the girl who used to trip over the lengths of his robes that you carried, now a woman who holds herself righteously and bravely
you, who chose to risk your own life from the moment you woke him up in his chambers
you, who is still risking your life to flee with him
“only if you stop calling me prince,” he jokingly nudges you back, attempting to make the atmosphere lighter despite the wetness that is starting to paint his eyes. “with you, i am just mingi”
“okay, prince mingi,” you tease
yet, you still extend a hand out to him, palm upturned in a silent invitation for comfort should he wish to seek it, because you can tell that he isn’t quite ready to seek it verbally
mingi laces his larger fingers through yours, tucking your interlocked hands closer to his body as he draws his knees up so that he can rest his chin upon them
mingi thinks that he feels numb more than anything, but he finds he isn’t as surprised as one would expect him to be
perhaps he always knew of his middle brother’s thirst for the throne
he just never thought it would be enough to spill blood
for now though, he lets himself be distracted by your thumb tracing mindless patterns against his knuckles
he lets himself relish in the heat radiating from your side that seems to warm him from inside out, even as the embers of the fire slowly lose their glow and die out with the darkening night
the days start to repeat themselves
you two cover as much distance as you can while sparing what time you can afford for yourselves and mingi’s horse to rest
mingi has decided to travel to prince yunho's kingdom, an old and trusted ally who may be able to provide you two with protection while he pulls strings to fight back against prince eun
from his calculations, the journey will take at least another two weeks
and although mingi doesn’t tell you this, deep down he does not know whether you two have two weeks left
the threat of the royal guards catching up hangs over the two of you like a hangman’s noose
neither of you have brought up that night by the fire either
but something has definitely changed in the way you seek comfort and reassurance in each other
as if so long as you have each other, everything will be alright in the end
when you feel him tremble as he sleeps curled around you, restless from a plaguing nightmare, you hush sweet nothings and brush his locks away from his forehead until his breathing steadies out again
and when you’re seated on the saddle in front of him, you now having long grown accustomed to horse riding, he still finds himself resting a comforting hand on you somewhere - your hips, thigh or over your own hand
sometimes when he is laughing softly with you, your arms brushing against each other, you imagine a different story; one where you are worthy of loving him
sometimes when you are tucked into his chest, small exhales escaping your open lips as you sleep, mingi imagines a different story; one where he is able to love you freely
because despite the blood running through his veins that has ultimately led to his downfall, you still look at him as though he has placed the stars in the very sky that you two have spent countless nights under
and although he knows the reality is that he cannot, he tries to write his own story, even if just for tonight
you are lying in his arms, legs tangled together, when the question comes tumbling out of his lips
“will you stay with me, forever?”
he feels you still in his embrace, before you’re pulling back a little to look at him with a chuckle
“you should be asking a princess that, prince mingi, not somebody like me”
“you are a princess in my eyes”
you can’t help the endearing look that crosses over your face as you lightly tap his nose, “you know that is not how it works”
“then we can run away. for i am already as good as dead to my kingdom,” he tells you with boyish determination
“you cannot, mingi. your people need a good prince”
“but what prince would i be if i cannot even boldly love you? the person who is dearest to me?”
under his sincere gaze and the weight of his words, you allow him this moment of solace
because perhaps, you want it just as much as he does
“okay, i’ll be your princess,” you breathe out
“forever?”
“forever”
that night, it is just you and mingi - no titles that separate your world from his, no looming threat of death - just two people in love
even as an uneasy pit settles at the bottom of mingi’s stomach, a growing feeling that gnaws away at him into the early hours of the next morning
he is startled awake, your expression frightened, and he immediately understands when he hears the thunderous chorus of hooves hitting the ground towards you two
mingi had known there was not much time left, but he did not think that the inevitable confrontation would happen this soon, only mere hours after the soft kiss he had pressed against your forehead
the desperate attempt to escape once more is futile, the royal guards closing the distance within minutes
left with no choice but to stop, you and mingi demount and the guards move to flank you both in a wide semicircle
when the head of the guards, prince eun, saunters forward, mingi matches with a stride of his own so that he can step in front of you
“you killed the crown prince, eun,” mingi spits at his brother
“running and denying your actions up until your very last moments, i see,” prince eun laughs condescendingly. “and you even took a little dog with you, too”
mingi presses you closer to his back, hiding you from the leering gaze of his brother
prince eun smiles smugly at mingi’s reaction, before he takes out a scroll and unravels it
“for high treason of the assassination of the crown prince, the king hereby decrees the immediate revocation of nobility of his third son, song mingi, and for the execution of song mingi and his maid upon sighting.”
you press your nose into mingi’s back, taking one last inhale of his familiar scent
the bowmen all take aim as prince eun sneers, “any last words, brother?”
mingi turns around, and all you can see in that moment are his warm eyes and dimpled cheeks
“i love you, my princess,” he proclaims
“forever,” you reply
he brings his lips down to connect them with yours, drowning out the distinct vibration of loosening strings and the hiss of flying arrows with the roaring symphony in your hearts
you’re unsure what pain swallows you whole first - the pain as an arrowhead sinks into your chest, or the pain as you realise that this is the end of your short-lived love with mingi
you struggle to keep the smile on your face as you lock eyes with mingi, trying to memorise the loving gaze that adorns his own face
you see his mouth moving, but the pain exploding throughout your body is too loud for you to make out his words
with your last breath, you gasp out your final confession, “i love you too, mingi. we’ll meet again in the next life”
as the world starts to fade away, cold creeping into your limbs, you hope that in another story, in another lifetime, you and mingi will be able to find each other again
wooyoung
pov: you're the princess of a rival kingdom
“absolutely not, advisor lee,” your mother raises her nose in the air
“your highness, i understand but-”
“oh please, do not flatter yourself, queen cho,” queen jung spits out, “you are not the only one who abhors the idea”
you glare at the prince sitting across from you, your own gazes reflecting the tension in the room
advisor lee has suggested that your family and the jung family host a joint royal ball as a grand display of amity between the two neighbouring kingdoms, particularly between the princess - yourself - and their prince - prince wooyoung
there have been spreading rumours in town of the strained relationship between the two royal families
which aren’t entirely untrue
as a child, the two kingdoms have been loyal and steadfast in their alliance and friendship
in fact, it is not uncommon to find you joining prince wooyoung in his kitchen, begging the chefs to let you two lick the spoons
or to find prince wooyoung squatting next to you in your garden as you both look at the ladybugs
but as power imbalances emerge and political agendas start to diverge, a wedge is driven between your families
the relation is now dangerously close to severing completely, but not without the increasing attention of the towns surrounding the two kingdoms
and one of the last things both royal families need is unease and disunity amongst the commoners
which brings advisor lee to look on with exasperation as he tries to do his job - advise
except neither your mother nor queen jung look ready to accept his advice
your father nods slightly at the two of you, “you are dismissed, as are you, prince wooyoung”
you curtsy as the prince takes a slight bow, before you obnoxiously flick your hair over your shoulder and turn away on your heels
you escape to the garden, knowing that the meeting will take at least another hour before you are required to bid the jung family farewell
except, surprise surprise
who do you run into
you narrow your eyes at prince wooyoung as he steps towards you, who has one eyebrow quirked, “a royal ball, he says?”
“absolutely not,” you fold your arms across your chest
“oh please, do not flatter yourself, princess,” he sneers, not dissimilar to the nasally tone his mother had voiced her dissatisfaction earlier with
neither of you back down, daring the other to say something else
before you two break out into giggles, eyes glittering scandalously
“did you see your mother deliberately pass the salt instead of sugar for the tea?”
“and then the face my mother made when she took a sip of it-”
he pulls you to crouch behind an azalea bush as you both chortle like children, out of sight, before he brings you in for a dizzying kiss
you sigh, resting a hand on his chest
“do you also abhor the idea of dancing with me, prince wooyoung?” a teasing lilt in your voice
“absolutely,” he nods grimly, “why go to all that effort when there is a much grander and longer-lasting solution?”
“and what is that, my prince?”
he sneaks another chaste kiss from your lips, “for me to take your hand in marriage, my princess”
at his words, your smile dampens
“you know that i would say yes in a heartbeat. it is not i who needs convincing, but our parents”
because despite the growing hostility between your two families, the relationship you share with wooyoung has, ironically, blossomed into one of well-concealed adoration, intimacy and love
you two have come to learn that that one slightly lighter stone on the western side of your kingdom’s outer walls comes loose, and is the perfect size for slipping a piece of paper behind it
you two have also come to learn that every fourth week, if you ask your personal tutor enough questions about the plants laid out on the store’s table in front of you during your scheduled lesson in town, you’ll be able to drag it out long enough for you both to just catch a glimpse of each other as he and his escorts cut through the town on their way back to his kingdom
and of course, you two have come to learn the most isolated spots in your own respective kingdoms, like the second stairwell leading down to the cellar in wooyoung’s palace
and amongst the azalea bushes in the back garden in yours
which is exactly how you knew that he would appear, how you knew that he would give you those sweet kisses you have been craving so desperately
as wooyoung cups your jaw to kiss you once more, one that leaves you wanting to chase his lips forever, he bets you that it’ll only take two weeks of close-quarter meetings between your royal families before one of your mothers blow up and the ball idea falls through completely
in response, you bet him that they won’t even last two weeks - one at the most
except you’re both wrong
the meeting turns into two, followed by several more as the planning goes ahead
sometimes, the meetings are held in the jung palace
other times, their family journeys to your kingdom instead
one thing that stays constant is the malevolence in the air
the parents are sarcastic snipes and saccharine smiles
and on the surface, you and wooyoung are further extensions of your own parents’ simmering loathing for the other
but under the intricately-carved wooden table, you two are playing footsies, jeweled heels and leather shoes engaged in a playful fight
you see how many times you can slide your heels up along his shin, gradually inching closer towards his inner thigh with each coquettish touch
he has you pass him anything and everything under the guise of forgoing the help of the numerous royal butlers and maids around the room to deliberately irritate you
really, it is to accidentally brush his fingers over your hands; to see the pretty shade of rose that settles over your cheeks and ears as you both try not to break out into giggles
and perhaps, during the meals that may take place during the meetings, there have been a couple of peas flicked at each other here and there when no one is paying attention
(unbeknownst to you two, the maids and butlers alike must hide their own endearing smiles)
the weeks turn into months and you practically have a permanent glow radiating from you, now that you have been seeing the prince so frequently
(which also does not go unnoticed)
as you select a necklace from the assortment of choices to emphasise the plunging neckline of your off-shoulder gown, you wonder how the day of the royal ball has arrived so quickly
your personal maid, jihye, carefully fixes the clasp of the necklace around you before stepping back to let you look in the mirror
you smooth a hand over the soft lavender charmeuse of your dress, nervously looking at jihye
“how do i look?”
“stunning, my princess,” she assures you, before adding, “prince wooyoung will definitely love it”
“prin- he- what? i- sorry?” you say unintelligibly, before you try to salvage the situation by tucking a lock of hair behind your ear as you laugh her off
but jihye just looks at you knowingly
meanwhile, prince wooyoung is already at the grand hall, the jung family having arrived two days prior for the final preparations of the ball
he and his friends, princes from kingdoms located further up north and towards the east, are lingering around one of the tables decorated with flower arrangements and elaborate candle holders, ignoring the longing glances of other attendees, women and men alike, thrown at their striking posse
wooyoung is trying to keep his gaze subtle, scanning the vast number of people at the ball without craning or turning his head, searching for one particular face
yours
prince yeosang nudges the others, jerking his chin to motion towards the distracted wooyoung
when wooyoung finally realises he isn’t as subtle as he thinks, all his friends are already looking at him with varying degrees of smirks
“just know that if there were not so many people here,” wooyoung begins with a pleasant smile, “i would flip you all off right now”
before he can try stepping on his friends’ toes in the form of petty revenge, prince seonghwa points towards the entrance as his smile grows impossibly wider
“look”
wooyoung turns around
and like any typical man who is head over heels in love, the world around him slows down
the gushing whispers spreading throughout the ballroom fade into the background
because finally, there you are, gracefully stepping past the threshold of the arched doorway in all your alluring beauty, accentuated by the way your curled locks and flowing gown frame your body
for the briefest moment, you lock eyes with him, and wooyoung feels his brain shutting down on him
“you’re going to catch a fly in your mouth, woo”
“pick up your jaw. it’s on the ground”
prince yunho pretends to dab wooyoung’s mouth with the ruffled sleeves of his cream shirt, “you’re drooling, darling”
at that, wooyoung smacks his lips dazedly before coming to a moment of realisation, blinking hard twice to bring himself back to reality
“god, you’re hopeless. just go up and talk to her,” prince hongjoong snickers. “the whole point of this ball is to show off how ‘close’ your families are anyway”
wooyoung grumbles that he knows, he’s just looking for the right timing
which, unfortunately, does not seem to come
you spend what feels like the next two hours being whisked around, feigning polite interest as you are forced to engage in dull and bland conversations with numerous men of differing royal statuses, all of whom are no doubt trying to make an impression on you in hopes of becoming a potential suitor in the future
not that you have eyes for anyone apart from the one who already has your heart
the very same person who is currently fed up with watching you converse and let your hands be kissed by men who are not him
even if he knows you are pretending, he thinks that you sure are damn good at giggling at all the right times
you are trying not to let your smile turn into a grimace as the older-aged man, lord ryu you think, boasts of his wealth to you, when wooyoung enters your peripheral vision
“princess, lord ryu,” he greets you both, before looking down at the latter, “pardon me as i take the princess for a dance”
lord ryu, visibly irked but unable to say anything to the prince of significantly higher status, lets go of your hand to step back into a bow, “of course, prince wooyoung”
you giggle, this time genuinely, as wooyoung takes your hand to gently lead you towards the center of the ballroom, where several others are starting to waltz to the soft music that is now playing
you rest a hand just below his shoulder, feeling the sturdiness of his muscles flexing beneath his shirt, as he places his other hand to settle on the dip of your waist
a little possessively, you might add
“you look beautiful today,” he murmurs lowly, away from any prying ears
“only today?” you quirk an eyebrow teasingly
his voice drops down an octave, “well it’s not every day that i can tell you, princess”
wooyoung’s eyes flicker down hungrily to look at your lips
you run your tongue slowly over your bottom lip, knowing it will drive him absolutely crazy that he cannot just take you right there and then in front of everybody
and you can see the moment his resolve snaps
“meet me for some fresh air in ten,” bringing his lips as close to the shell of your ear as he dares
and then he’s gone
you become progressively antsy as you wait out a generous amount of time after he leaves for you to also slip away from the ballroom
wooyoung pins you against a pillar as soon as you emerge in the garden, aching to kiss you and fight for dominance until you’re both breathless and light-headed
“you don’t know how desperately i wanted to kiss you in front of everyone - let the whole world know that you’re mine,” he nips at your bottom lip
you rest your hands on his chest, fingers curled around the pleated front of his satin shirt to hold yourself steady as he turns your lips into an artwork of swollen cherry reds
he tilts your head back a little more, your mouths moving in tandem, soft moans drawn out of you, when-
“what in god’s name is going on?”
you and wooyoung startle apart at the shriek
the blush dusting your faces pale almost immediately at the sight of not just your mother, but also queen jung and a few of the royal staff
it’s kind of amusing that of all things for the two queens to have the same mindset about, it is the discovery of you and wooyoung’s secret relationship that unites them, both sharing twin expressions of horror and revulsion
you’re ripped from each other’s arms as you are forced back into the confines of your bed chamber, royal ball long forgotten
your only solace is learned later that night, when jihye brings a trolley of food you have no appetite for, that the jung family have not yet returned to their kingdom
they are still in your palace somewhere
yet that does little to soothe your tears, overwhelmed by the drastic turn of events, and you do not know when you fall asleep that night
all you know is that it is to a bed too cold and a longing in your heart too gaping to ignore
“princess,” you look up to see jihye standing at your door the next morning, almost apologetic, “the king and queen request for your presence in the throne room”
as you approach the room after tidying your appearance, your breath hitches when you spot him just by the double doors
you barrel forwards into his waiting arms, uncaring of the staff following behind you
not that they have the heart to stop you either way
“i thought you would have been forced to leave,” you blurt, unable to believe that wooyoung is right in front of you
“i’m still here,” he chuckles. “i have been summoned by your parents”
your heart drops down to your stomach at his words as you realise what this meeting is about
“and i am glad they did, princess,” wooyoung is quick to interject before your apology makes it past the tip of your tongue. “i am going to ask for your hand in marriage. officially”
“what if they banish us from ever seeing each other again?” worry overwhelms you as your breathing quickens
wooyoung gently laces his fingers through yours, bringing up his other hand to cup your face and run his thumb comfortingly over the curve of your cheekbone to keep you grounded
“no matter what happens today, no matter what the outcome is,” he looks at you with the fierce determination of a man ready to give up anything and everything for your sake, “i will never ever stop fighting for you”
he presses his soft lips against yours
“for us,” he vows
your breathing evens out, and while your heartbeat still pounds inside your ribcage, you know that it marches in rhythm with the man in front of you
this time, not afraid to appear in front of the rulers of your kingdoms - your parents - you and wooyoung nod in reassurance at each other once more, hand in hand, before you both push the doors to the throne room open
together.
jongho
pov: you're under his protection as your royal guard
over the din of volunteered names in the meeting room, jongho steps forward
“your majesty, i will accompany the princess,” he declares
“choi jongho?” your father scans him up and down with regard before nodding in approval, “it is decided then”
“him? surely i need another person with me as well?” you protest
your father quirks an eyebrow at you, a subtle reminder that whilst he is your father, he is also the king
“no, you will need to travel in disguise and stay as discreet as possible. only jongho will accompany you as your royal guard”
your father looks away and starts to address the next item on the meeting agenda; it is quite clear there is no room for argument
meanwhile, jongho sidles up to you
“you trying to catch bugs or something? close your mouth, princess,” he teases under his breath
you nudge him with an elbow, “you’re the only bug i see around here”
he rolls his eyes but you both snicker in unison when one of your older sisters turns around to shush you with a dirty look
regardless, you stay silent for the rest of the meeting
you’re not sure why jongho stepped forward to take on this task
because for someone who is your main royal guard and is supposed to be loyal and obedient, he sure makes it clear that his job is about as gratifying as babysitting
(“you can’t talk to me like that. i’m the princess”)
(“no, you’re not. you’re an idiot”)
in fact, when you had been notified a few days prior that you would be traveling with one other royal guard - who had yet to be decided at the time - jongho had spent every single day gloating that he would finally get a break from babysitting you
and yet here he is
with the opportunity to hand you off to somebody else
but instead, baring his teeth at the other guards who offer themselves up for this scouting mission
he would never admit to it either, but jongho personally spoke to the king years ago about being rostered on as your main bodyguard since he’s “known the princess for the longest and so i can protect her the best”
you don’t want to travel to the border
you’re in charge of maintaining security and defense along your borders and with neighbouring kingdoms, usually dealing with complications remotely through the ministers and advisors who work for you
this time though, there has been recent unrest near the southern borders of your kingdom near denport, a city notorious for bandits and fugitives
the situation has worsened with increased risk of bloodshed, thus has the need for you to survey the borders in person
and as the youngest sibling of five, the king has made it very clear that this is your opportunity to prove your capabilities
jongho makes sure to remind you of this fact when you grumble your way through packing a satchel of essential items to take with you
(“your fluffy slippers are not essential, princess”)
(you listen and throw them back onto the floor of your bedchambers, but stuff in a few paperweights when he isn’t looking out of petty revenge because you know he’ll end up carrying your bag for you later when you ask him to)
it’s a relatively long journey to denport, so as soon as you are ready, jongho having long finished packing his own bag, you leave your kingdom with him at your side
by the time the sun is starting to set later that day, you’re passing through a small town
he suggests calling it a night and recuperating at one of the inns
you wait while he inquires about available rooms and then follow him through a small alleyway to the inn that he has chosen for the night
you take all but one look at the rotting wood and creaking sign at the entrance before you are crossing your arms like a petulant child
“there’s no way i’m staying the night in this sorry excuse of an inn”
he merely blinks
“you’re technically not the princess right now so you better listen to me or god help me, i’ll-”
“you’ll what,” you challenge, nose-to-nose
or nose-to-throat, you suppose
but before you can dwell any further on your height difference, jongho picks you up, slings you over his shoulder like you are nothing more than a sack of potatoes, and walks into the inn without a care in the world that you are screaming bloody murder
you resign to your fate and flop uselessly against his back as he carries you up the stairs
instead, when he throws you onto the bed upon entering the room, you look up at him sultrily and smirk, “ooh, now i’m turned on”
jongho shakes his head with exasperation but you don’t miss the redness that is creeping up the back of his neck as he turns around to close the door shut
“wait,” you sit up on the bed, “we’re sharing a room?”
“it’s safer. i’ll sleep on the sofa”
you scrunch your nose at the arrangement, but you do admittedly feel a little more at ease in the unfamiliar room of the inn
you start to take a shoe off before a thought flits through your mind and you point the shoe in your hand at him like a weapon, “you better not snore”
jongho rolls his eyes as he steps forward to take the shoe out of your hand, and then he is bending down to help slip off the shoe from your other foot
a thank you lies on the tip of your tongue
“you’re the only snorer in this room, princess”
nevermind.
it’s gone.
you’re settled in bed, waiting for jongho to finish washing up and turn off the lights, when you spot it
holy shit
your immediate reaction is to seek his protection
“jongho!”
the door to the bathroom swings open almost immediately as he rushes out, eyes alarmed, alert, and zeroing onto you
water drips off the ends of his hair and you can still spot suds on his exposed torso
“what’s wrong? are you okay? are you hurt?” his voice is laced with restrained panic
you point to the corner of the room and then he sees it too
his body stiffens completely
because, mere metres from the two of you, presence sinister and dangerous…
is a fucking spider
all is quiet and still for a while, your eyes flickering back and forth between your royal guard and the spider in a tense standoff
then, just as you are about to speak up, jongho grabs his bag and swiftly turns on his heels to head towards the room’s door
“where are you going?!” you shriek
he looks at you forlornly from over his shoulder, “to prepare for my execution”
“what the fuck are you on about, jongho?”
“for abandoning my duties and failing to protect you. farewell, princess. you are on your own from here-”
his sentence is cut short as the spider scuttles towards him
and that is how you two, disguised, but still a royal princess and royal guard no less, are given an eviction warning because he streaked through the corridors of the inn half naked and screaming at the top of his lungs
needless to say, the innkeeper ends up having to remove the spider for the two of you
“you’re so embarrassing,” you whisper to him once you two are finally settled in bed and on the sofa
“no, i’m jongho,” he cackles
you don’t humour him with a response, but you know he snickers himself to sleep that night
you can’t help but let the corner of your lips tug up as well
a few days later after leaving the town, you two are resting side by side against a tree trunk when you decide to grace jongho with the opportunity to redeem himself
he’s currently halving a sandwich so you two can share
“if i were trapped in a forest full of spiders and you were the only person who could save me,” you ask gravely, “what would you do?”
without missing a beat, he replies, “prepare to grieve your death and make sure your pet cat is well fed in your honour”
he passes you the bigger sandwich as you turn to look at him with the most scandalised expression
“can you at least pretend to think for a bit?” you grumble
there’s a hint of a smile on jongho’s face when he apologises, “okay, sorry. ask me again”
you hit him with a different scenario this time
“if you had to fight a giant spider who had taken me hostage, what would you do?”
he hums thoughtfully for a few seconds, unscrewing a canteen of water for you and placing it by your side
“i would say, she is all yours, your spidery majesty, and then i would bow and walk away”
“fuck you,” you shove him good-naturedly with your shoulder
he swipes the canteen before you can knock it over and presses it into your smaller hand instead, giving it a quick pat as he dismisses your insult, “sure, if you think you can handle my dick”
“like they say,” you waggle your eyebrows at him as your voice drops down lower, “practice makes perfect”
jongho’s stoic facade finally cracks when you lean in closer and he hurries to stand up and put some distance between you and him
he shifts his legs subtly, clearing his throat to say, “we should go, denport is close”
when you’ve finished off the last of your sandwich, you dust off your fingers and grab jongho’s offered hand to stand up too
“let’s go”
one thing you have both noticed is that the closer you get to the border between your kingdom and denport, the quieter and thicker the atmosphere seems to get
the small towns you pass through have less people roaming around; in fact, most people seem to flee back into the refuge of their own houses, locking their doors and closing their windows when they catch sight of your pair
and then it happens
your plan goes awry
you and jongho are harshly awoken by a commotion outside the small room you have rented for the night
there’s a sickening smell accompanied by wails of grief in the air
when you rush outside, all you can see is a huge crowd of people gathered and your ears strain to pick up on the broken hushes of information being thrown around
“his son is lucky to have been spared”
“lucky to have seen his father slaughtered by bandits?”
“i heard it wasn’t money that they were after, though”
“those damned denport devils are up to something”
that’s all you pick up on before jongho snatches your arm and leads you back into the inn, telling you that it’s too dangerous to be out there; too dangerous for you two to continue traveling
which leads to the very first argument you ever have with him
you two butt heads all the time with your own fiery fronts and hardheadedness but more often than not, he yields to you
you’re facing him in the dim room - it is shadier than that first inn you two made a stop at weeks ago, but you’re both sharing one room just like you two have done at every single inn since
“we need to go check it out!” you shout at him
jongho takes a shaky breath as he tries to keep his voice even, “no, we should go back to our kingdom, report on the situation and call for backup!”
you throw your hands up into the air, “we’re already here - we’re basically at denport! what if something blows up soon? it might be too late by the time we go back”
jongho steps in closer as his eyes narrow
you don’t cower because you know he would never hurt you, but you do step backwards because you don’t think you can keep a clear head when he is standing so close to you, proximity dizzying like the buzz of alcohol
“of all times for you to play hero and do something that you weren’t asked to, why now? why put yourself in danger?”
your back hits the wall as jongho corners you
your chest heaves, as does his, both of you overwhelmed with emotions
he holds your gaze but his eyes are rounded with agony and distress
you don’t understand why he is so against your decision
you don’t know what to say, until your eyes flicker down involuntarily at the movement of his lips parting to exhale-
“damn, jongho, your lips are real chapped. you should use some of my lip balm”
he blinks hard at the absurdity of what you chose to say
he looks at your lips
he makes a decision
“then give me some of yours,” he says, a little breathless
and then he’s pressing his chapped lips against your smooth ones, the taste of coconut filling your mouth as your lip balm smears
suddenly, he pulls back with the audacity to look shocked as if you are the one who kissed him
and then he leaves the room without another word
he doesn’t return that night and you don’t manage to sleep either
you wonder when you started becoming used to falling asleep with him in the same room
jongho clears his throat awkwardly when you open the door in the morning and find him leaning against the wall just by the doorframe
you’re not sure whether he came back not too long ago from god knows where, or whether he was actually standing guard outside all night
you think you know which one it is, even if he doesn’t confirm it
“we’re checking out,” he mumbles, shuffling briskly into the room to grab his few belongings he had left and exiting the room again with you trailing behind
neither of you say much more to each other
you think that he’s going to lead you back the way you two came, lead you back and undo the weeks’ worth of journeying and go back to the castle
but then he’s sighing, deep and burdened, and he gently takes your hand to continue on towards denport
he’s never held your hand before
not like this, at least, tenderly tugging you along with every step so that you are no more than a few inches away from his side
you want to bicker with him and chortle together like usual but you keep quiet, giving him the space that he appears to need even if he is physically ensuring you are tucked right into his side
you two walk until the sun has dipped below the horizon
from what you know, you are right along the southern border and denport will only be another half day’s walk away
jongho makes a small bonfire before he joins you to lean against a fallen log
he shimmies off his coat and drapes it over your legs and then the forest also settles into silence along with you both
it’s now or never
“why are you so against us going to the border?” you ask him
he runs his fingers through his hair
an unruly tuft of hair stays upright and you fold your arms to stop yourself from reaching out and smoothening it for him
he looks at you as he says, “i’m fine with me going to the border, it’s you i’m not fine with. you do remember that i’m your royal guard, right”
“is that all there is to your reason,” you push, “that you’re my guard?”
you both know you’re referring to more than just the argument itself
jongho’s gaze breaks away, looking ahead at the flames of the fire instead
he is silent
for once, jongho is unarmed; no immediate snark or teasing remark to toss back at you
you hear him swallow and take a breath
“i…i don’t know,” he starts. “all i know is that with each passing day, the more i want to keep you safe”
jongho looks at you again, eyebrows drawn down ever so slightly
“why do you make me feel so worried?”
at his words, your heart clenches in an unfamiliar way and you attempt to lighten the mood, “maybe you like me”
“maybe i do”
oh.
with the reflection of the fire dancing in his eyes, it almost looks as though he is about to cry
“please, don’t go to the border, princess,” he begs softly
his plea remains unwavering and you find your heart doing the exact opposite
after a few seconds of silence, you say
“okay, jongho. i won’t”
the tension from his shoulders seeps out and he gently tugs you towards him so he can tuck you into his side once again
“you promise that we turn around and go back tomorrow morning?”
you nod against the warmth of the crook of his neck, then murmur, “do you think father will be disappointed in me? for returning?”
he rubs a hand up and down your arm soothingly
“of course not, princess. you’ve already done so much more than you needed to. he’ll be proud of you”
and then he adds on, “just like i’m proud of you”
this is the first time anyone has ever really validated your efforts; being the youngest of a large family means you are often overshadowed
caught off guard, all you can do is whisper out, “thank you, jongho”
he hums and you feel his smile against the crown of your head
you’ve never been drunk before, but you think that this is the closest you have ever gotten
you are intoxicated by him
“if you’re thankful,” the rumble of jongho’s voice against your cheek is pleasant, “can i ask for something?”
“whatever you want”
he eases you from the comfort of his neck and tilts your chin up slightly with a finger, cheeky grin plastered across his face
“can i have some more of your lip balm?”
#loren writes#ateez fics#ateez smut#ateez x reader#san x reader#san smut#san scenarios#mingi x reader#mingi scenarios#wooyoung x reader#wooyoung scenarios#jongho x reader#jongho scenarios#ateez ot8 x reader#ateez fluff#ateez angst#ateez crack#ateez scenarios#ateez imagines#ateez headcanons#ateez au#royal ateez#prince ateez#prince!ateez
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
best friend's brother - choi san
pairing: choi san x f!reader
summary: when your night with your crush doesn't go to plan, you find comfort in the person you'd least expect
genre: smut, some fluff, some angst
word count: 3k
content/tw: nonidol characters, college au, san has a sister named mina (not meant to be mina from twice), other random idol names are used, fingering, unprotected sex, drunk sex (don’t do this in real life)
a/n: this may be a cringefest bc it was my first fic
18+ minors dni (masterlist)
you tap on jimin’s instagram story for an update on where he might be. he’s in a car with his friends, most likely on his way here. replaying the post over and over, you don’t realize how long you’ve been staring at his smile until you’re hit on the leg with a pillow, snapping you back into reality.
“are you even listening to me?” mina snaps. you grin and sit up against the pillows on her bed.
today is mina’s birthday, and she decided to throw a party at her house tonight. but even though she invited tons of people, she only cares about one guest. so much so, that she’s cycled through five different outfits just to look as good as possible.
“you look hot.” you say jokingly, grabbing and hugging the pillow she just threw at you. “jin is going to notice you, quit overthinking it.”
mina groans. “why aren’t they here yet?”
“they’re on their way right now, they’ll probably be here soon. can we please go now?” you whine. the party started almost an hour ago, but you’ve been waiting for your friend to finish getting ready.
“i just need a few more minutes. go ahead, i’ll find you later.” she says, looking in the mirror as she puts on a pair of earrings.
as you leave the room, your ears are instantly flooded with music despite the party only being downstairs. you head towards the bathroom and step inside to check your hair and makeup in the mirror.
you and mina invited jimin and jin to the party, and it’s the only thing you two have thought about all week. mina and jin are practically a thing at this point, but you can’t say the same for you and jimin. you’re always too nervous to hold a conversation with him. it’s nothing a little liquid courage can’t fix, though. you hope.
there’s a knock on the bathroom door. you open it expecting it to be mina. instead, you’re greeted by a large frame with silky black hair.
of course, it’s mina’s brother san.
despite being a player on campus, he’s really sweet and protective over you. presumably because you’re his sister’s friend. still, he’s always been respectful and never tried to make a move on you.
but you’ve definitely caught him staring once or twice, and youd be lying if you said you didn’t do the same.
“oh, hi y/n.” he examines your outfit, making you feel self-conscious. “i started to think i’d never see you guys come out of that room.”
“sorry,” you smile awkwardly, walking around him into the hallway. “she’s nervous about jin.”
“jin’s coming?”
“yeah, and jimin”. you reply.
san’s posture straightens. “so you actually like him?”
“i never said that.” you protest.
“i hear you guys all the time. you aren’t really discreet about it.” he smiles.
you can’t help but notice his dimples every time he does that. your relationship with him has only ever been platonic, but you’re almost always dumbfounded by his appearance.
“i mean, maybe. i can’t really tell if he feels the same way though.” you say, fidgeting with your hands.
san leans against the wall. “i wouldn’t waste my time on him,”.
“what? what do you mean?”
“i don’t like him. it doesn’t matter though; you can do better than him.”
who the hell does he think he is?
“you don’t even know him. why should i care what you think?” you say, furrowing your brows.
in reality, san knows jimin more than you’d thin. they’ve never been friends, but he’s spent enough time around him to know that he’s not worth dating.
san is well aware of his position in your life, but he still cares and doesn’t want to see you hurt. your words stung a little, but he wouldn’t let you know that.
san grins and lets out a soft chuckle that pisses you off a little.
mina’s bedroom door opens and she steps out in yet another outfit choice.
“it took you an hour to come up with that?” san says teasingly, gesturing to mina’s outfit.
mina’s eyes widen. “is it actually that bad?” she gaps.
“he’s joking.” you smile, despite the anger you felt a few seconds ago. “you look cute, can we go now?” you asked, grabbing mina’s hand and pulling her towards the stairs.
not only would she have actually changed her outfit again, but you would’ve done anything to get out of that situation. you’re an adult and can date whoever you want. why is san treating you like you’re his sister... or his girlfriend?
as you walk away with mina, you glance over your shoulder to see san still looking at you, except this time he’s more serious.
the party was open invitation, but you’re still surprised by the number of people that actually showed. you and mina grab two beers from the kitchen.
you feel a tug on your arm. “they’re over there!”. she points to jin and jimin sitting on a sofa with drinks and talking.
your stomach knots at the sight of jimin and you start to feel flustered. he looks so good you start to second guess your outfit just as much as mina did hers. you chug your drink, hoping the alcohol will set in soon.
mina laughs at your nervousness. “are you ready?”
“i think so –”
“hey guys!” mina yells over the music, interrupting you.
your heart drops even further than it already did.
jmin and jin look over as you and mina make your way to them. mina sits next to Jin, leaving you with no choice but to sit next to jimin on the opposite end. you were hoping Mina would be with you to ease the awkwardness, but that plan is instantly thrown out the window.
jimin turns his body towards you, and you start to wish you’d planned things to talk about.
“hey, you look nice.” he smiles.
“thank you.” you respond shyly. somehow you feel even more self-conscious despite the compliment.
“i haven’t seen you in class lately.” you mention, hoping your awkwardness doesn’t show.
“oh. i’ve been kind of focused on my music lately. i’m actually considering switching majors.” he says.
he continues speaking but as you glance around your attention is caught by san across the room.
he’s looking directly at you, while a girl is holding his arm and laughing. he’s pretending to listen, but he’s watching you and jimin. you can’t seem to break the eye contact, as if your eyes are glued to him.
you realize you’re mid conversation and shift your focus back on jimin, who’s still talking about himself.
“i think that’s great.” you smile at him, unknowing of what he spent the last 30 seconds talking about.
“y/n, can I borrow you for a sec?” mina leans forward into your gaze.
you nod. “sorry, one second.” you excuse yourself from the conversation and follow mina as she pulls you aside.
“jin and i are going to my room; are you gonna be fine on your own?” she asks lowly.
“what? you’re sleeping with jin already?” you exclaim.
mina shushes you and looks around the room as if anyone could’ve heard you over the music.
“i don’t know, probably.” she says, grinning like an idiot.
“i’ll be fine. be safe.” you smile.
she nods and waves over jin, and he follows her upstairs
you make your way over to where you previously were but realize jimin is gone. you scan the room for him but can’t find him. you start to regret letting mina go and feel awkward all over again. you look around for a familiar face and see san, still talking to the same girl and clearly uninterested. you find chaewon and yunjin and join them for a while.
almost two hours pass while you’re busy getting drunk and dancing.
mina comes back with jin, but you’ve been so caught up that you forgot about them and jimin.
“hey.” you almost cringe realizing what they might have just finished doing.
mina grins and rolls her eyes. “where’s jimin?”
you shrug. “he left after you guys did”
“that’s weird,” jin says.
“i’ll go look for him.”
you scan downstairs one more time, but he’s still nowhere to be seen. you realize the party extended to the patio and open the door to check outside.
you find him, but you’re practically frozen in place when you do. he’s sitting next to a pretty blonde girl, kissing and feeling her up. you start to feel sick. you know that the two of you weren’t exclusive, but you still had hope there would be something between you. you’ve been obsessed with him for months and the one night you decided to make a move, the universe betrays you. the embarrassment starts to set in when you realize practically everyone knew about your crush as well.
you can’t watch any longer, and head back inside. you don’t feel like looking for mina. you don’t want to ruin her birthday by forcing her to comfort you. you’re too ashamed to admit what happened, anyways. you’re too drunk to walk or drive home, so you go to mina’s bedroom to wait for the rest of the night.
you open the door to her bedroom but the unmade bed reminds you of what just happened in it. and as disgusting as you feel, you’d rather not fall asleep on a bed full of sweat and god knows what else.
standing in the hallway, you start to feel the frustration set in and tears begin to well in your eyes.
you hear heavy footsteps on the stairs and immediately wipe your tears.
you don’t know whether to be grateful or upset over the fact that it’s san. as soon as you see his face, you’re reminded of the situation from earlier. and the last thing you want is to hear an “i-told-you-so”.
“what’s wrong?” he says, noticing your expression.
“nothing.” you reply, trying to contain yourself.
“why were you crying then?” he approaches you, practically trapping you in between him and the wall.
“i’m just tired.” you lie, looking down hoping to avoid eye contact.
“don’t lie to me,” san says, lifting your chin.
“did he do something to you?” he’s more intimate this time, and you realize you won’t get anywhere by hiding the truth.
“you were right.” you admit, removing his hand from your face. you start to feel the shame overwhelm you again
san sighs and looks around the hallway to make sure you were alone.
“are you happy?” you continued.
“of course i’m not happy,” san says, offended by the accusation. “you’ve had too much to drink. let’s just get you to bed, okay?”
you know he didn’t do anything wrong. none of this was his fault. to be fair, he did warn you. you weren’t mad at san, but you were overwhelmed and didn’t know what else to do. so, you took it out on him.
“you’ve been watching me like a creep all night waiting for something to go wrong. now you want to pretend you feel bad and take care of me?” you snap.
san sucks his teeth and grabs your wrist. pulling you to his bedroom, he shuts the door behind him and leans against it.
“can you calm down?” he asks in annoyance, folding his arms.
you start pacing out of frustration, trying to keep yourself from breaking down.
“he’s not worth crying over, y/n. I told you that you could do better than him.” he says, pulling you back to him. he snakes one hand around your waist and starts wiping your tears with the other.
something about his presence makes you feel safe. he makes you feel like you could cry if you needed to, but how could you when you’re around him? the realization that your body is pressed against his starts to set in.
you always knew san was good-looking, but something about the way he’s letting you be vulnerable with him makes him so much more attractive. he looked unreal, yet somehow, he was standing right in front of you.
you must have been staring for a while because his expression darkens. his thumb that was just wiping your tears starts to brush softly over your lips. you feel like you’re going to pass out from the way he’s staring at your face, studying you.
san’s lips press against yours and his arms wrap around your waist. you reach over his wide shoulders and around his neck as he pulls your body closer to his. each kiss begins deepen, with small moans escaping your throat. and as passionate as they are, his lips are still so soft and careful with yours.
san’s lips move from yours to your neck, and he’s holding you as if you’d slip away once he lets go.
you can feel warmth pooling in between your legs, making your legs go numb. he sweeps you up and moves his focus back to your lips as he carries you to his bed. laying you on your back, he hovers over you between your legs, slipping his tongue into your mouth.
you let out a moan as reassurance for him to continue, so he slides his hand under your top. he squeezes and massages your breast, causing you to let out whines involuntarily.
“does that feel good?” he groans against your neck. you can feel him smiling against you, giving you chills in the best way possible.
you manage to let out a soft whiny “yes.”.
“i’m gonna make you feel so much better.” he promises. he plants a soft kiss against your collarbone before shifting his hand between your legs.
he circles his thumb against the outside of your panties, feeling the damp spots he caused. each feeling of him hitting your clit makes your breath hitch.
“fuck.” he groans. “my baby is so good and wet for me.” he moans, teasing you with his fingers.
you prop yourself up on your elbows, your forehead against his.
“could you please?” you plead softly.
“could I what? use your words, baby.” he teases, pushing more pressure onto your clit.
“fingers, please.” you babble, your head falling back from the sensitivity.
“you want me to fuck you with my fingers?” san smirks.
“mm-hmm.” you whine.
san pulls your panties to the side and pushes his thick finger in slowly, earning a whimper from you.
he can feel his cock growing feeling the warmth of you, wishing it was inside of you instead. the sound of his fingers slipping inside of you are audible from the wetness.
san can feel himself swelling up and leaking from the anticipation, but he wants to take his time with you. he loves the sight of you moaning and whining under his control with your head held back.
he pulls your head in by the back of your neck and snakes his tongue in your mouth while curling his fingers to reach your gspot. his tongue is warm and wet, and you feel yourself getting dizzy and falling apart.
“i’m gonna cum.” you manage to breathe out.
“wait a little longer for me,” san says, pulling his fingers out of your heat and kissing you before standing up.
he pulls his shirt off revealing his bare chest and smooth, toned skin. he’s practically sweating from the anticipation, making his abs and biceps look even more glossy. he looks like a greek god.
unzipping his pants and removing the rest of his clothes, his swollen cock reveals itself, already wet and leaking from the tip.
he pushes you back down and lets you wrap your legs around his waist.
rubbing his tip against your sensitive clit, he inserts himself, making you gasp. the feeling you felt from his finger was almost nothing compared to the size of him inside of you.
he groans at the feeling of you wrapped around and squeezing him and wastes no time before speeding up his pace. your moans can’t help but get louder, and he has to cover your mouth with his just in case someone may hear you whine.
he moves fast yet softly as if he doesn’t want to hurt you. still, the feeling of him inside of you is enough to make your eyes water. you feel your sensitivity from being edged earlier come back, and you’re close to your high all over again.
“i wish i could do this with you forever” he moans.
his pace starts to get sloppy, letting you know he’s close to finishing. you feel a wave of ecstasy take over your body as san releases inside of you, leaving you dripping. the two of you moan over the feeling of finishing on each other.
san collapses next to you as you both catch your breath. he gets up and slips on clothes to leave the room. you lay in confusion for a minute until he comes back with a warm towel.
he cleans you up and gives you one of his clean t-shirts to wear to sleep. you try to hide your smile from the thought of him being so sweet to you. when you put the shirt on, he falls in love at the sight of it being so big on you. he’s not super tall, but his muscles are enough to warrant his shirts being huge. san wraps his arms around you and gives you another kiss, but this time it feels more loving than the rest.
“do you feel better now?” he asks, embracing you.
you’d forgotten about what led to this in the first place. but you didn’t care enough to remember because you were in love with someone else now.
#choi san#choi san x reader#san ateez#ateez smut#jimin angst#bts jimin#ateez fluff#ateez angst#mingi smut#seonghwa smut#hongjoong smut#yunho smut#jongho smut#yeosang smut#wooyoung smut#ateez fanfic#choi san fanfic
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
spring tides [like the moon universe]
pairing: poly!ot8 ateez x fem!oc!reader
warnings: vague mentions of eating disorder, death and torture, scars, ptsd, very fluffy! a lot of comfort! not so dark this time xD I did not proofread this :D
word count: 14.1k
a/n: hello y'all :D I have returned with some LTM for you <;3 This is a oneshot for my like the moon universe! You don't necessarily need to read the series to understand this fic but it definitely helps the immersion and understanding some of the plot points! you can find all chapters of ltm on my masterlist <3
Seonghwa remembers something in the spring of your third year with Ateez. As he watches you at Jongho’s side, silently offering the guard slices of fruit as he cleans his claymore, Seonghwa recalls that he doesn’t know when your birthday is.
Jongho is murmuring something about the design of his blade and the engraving along the handle when Seonghwa stands abruptly. The eldest shifts on his feet, brows furrowed and teeth worrying his bottom lip. His lips purse when Jongho questions him.
“Hwa?”
The red-haired guard looks up at his partner with a lilt of concern in his voice, hands halting their motion on his blade. Jongho’s dark eyes glint as the fading sun catches the hickory color of his irises.
“Is there something wrong?” Jongho continues, already shifting to stand to his feet. “Are you alright?”
You rock on your feet, legs stretching as you prepare to stand with Jongho. Your eyes flicker across camp, scanning for whatever has caught Seonghwa’s attention. There’s two swords still strapped to your back and you can nearly feel the cool metal pressing into your skin – a haunting reminder of the terrible things you’ve done with them. The buzz beneath your skin itches with the beginnings of adrenaline, already prepared to stand and defend the two Ateez members at your sides.
Seonghwa lifts his hands and shakes his head to soothe you and Jongho before you can stand. He softly waves his hands to encourage you to sit back onto the carved log beneath you, a wary smile on his lips.
“No, it’s nothing,” he murmurs, still gnawing at his lip as he finishes. He offers a barely concealed sigh and shakes his head again. “‘M alright, just remembered something.”
Jongho doesn’t seem satisfied with the answer, but he settles back onto the floor regardless. His hands return to wiping down his claymore but he doesn’t look away from his partner.
You share the sentiment, continuing to watch Seonghwa and making note of each creak and scratch that echoes through the camp. You don’t know what startled him, but you’ll be prepared for the next time. The fruit in your hands has made your fingers sticky in the brief moments you spent looking up at Seonghwa rather than cutting the supple treat.
You don’t mind though. You like slicing fruit for Jongho. He doesn’t eat enough, you’ve noticed. You’re not quite sure why, but you suppose you don’t quite know how to ask. No matter the reason, it brings you comfort when he continues to take slices of succulent fruit from you as he cleans. He doesn’t look up, simply trusting you to place the pieces into his hands so he can eat without trouble. When you sat beside him that morning with the fruit in your hands, Jongho raised an eyebrow but didn’t mention it. You ate the first few slices before offering them to the wine-haired guard, who accepted them with a small smile. Every so often, he turns slightly, ensuring that you’re continuing to eat as much as he does.
At one point he tilts his head back, looking up at you with those pretty, boba pearl eyes and opens his mouth slightly. Both his hands are occupied, busy with the intricate care his blade necessitates. With your heart thumping quickly in your chest, you place a slice of fruit on Jongho’s waiting lips and try desperately not to linger on the thought of how full and supple they are.
“Thanks, love,” he murmurs without looking at you, the words sweet and saccharine in the low timber of his voice.
Seonghwa laughed when Jongho’s cheeks pinkened after that, but you weren’t really sure why.
Turning his attention to you, Seonghwa looks down at your figure. Sitting with a slight slump in your shoulders, the spymaster smiles faintly. Slouched posture is a good sign, he muses. You’re comfortable.
When you tilt your head to the side, silently questioning Seonghwa’s thoughts, you reach up to gingerly grasp his fingers. There’s no hesitation. There hasn’t been in a long while. Seonghwa extends his hand in offering when he notices your appendages twitch. His warmth sinks into your palm and you nearly hum at the soothing feeling.
You squeeze his hand twice before lingering for a longer third.
‘Are you okay?’ you silently question.
Seonghwa’s lips quirk into another gentle smile, but his eyes are distant. It makes your heart tug painfully. The hickory of his near-black irises is muted. You miss the glimmer of those sweet, dark eyes that show when he smiles.
“Yeah, m’alright, lovebug.”
Your heart slams into your ribs – a delighted feeling. Lovebug. You like that.
Seonghwa leans closer to repeat the gesture, squeezing twice and then lingering for an ‘okay.’ His other hand lifts to run over the back of your head with a delicate movement. Fingers carefully scratch against your scalp and you resist the temptation to lean into his hands and exhale softly.
“I have to go see Joong and Yunho, though. I really did just remember something I wanted to speak to ‘em about,” he whispers. Dragging his nails gently over the nape of your neck once more, Seonghwa smiles when you finally lean into his touch with a quiet rumble. He thinks you look positively cat-like. When one set of lashes flutters against your cheek in a tired, pleased expression, Seonghwa could coo at the endearing look. He withholds only to save you the embarrassment of his mother-hen tendencies.
Your one eye flickers over his expression once more before you relent and nod your head just once. Seonghwa’s hand begins to pull away from your head, and this time you do make a tiny sound of sadness. The eldest feels his heart squeeze at your reluctance to be parted from him, leaning close to drag his thumb over the stiff material of your mask with a sweet touch before he stands upright once more.
“I’ll be back in a minute, okay? You and Jongho finish up and join us for dinner soon.”
You let out a short exhale through your nose, a sound they’ve taken to signify your agreement. Jongho’s lips twitch at the noise, trying to hold back the laugh he wants to let out.
“Okay,” you whisper softly beneath your breath as you lean back against the back of the log. Seonghwa smiles and finally shifts his stance to leave, only pressing a gentle kiss to Jongho’s brow before walking off. Your head tilts one last time as Seonghwa leaves, wondering if perhaps one day he’ll kiss your head too when he takes his leave.
The archer finds Yunho before Hongjoong. The tallest of Ateez is easy to collect when Seonghwa gives him a meaningful look. The tension in the eldest’s brow must convince Yunho that there is something important he is needed for because he immediately follows after Seonghwa. The two find themselves in the Captain’s cavern, his and Seonghwa’s really, standing before the long-haired leader with a small frown on the archer’s lips.
Hongjoong mimics the frown, coming to a stand behind the desk currently holding a plethora of worn maps.
“What’s wrong?”
Seonghwa sighs, squeezing his fists together before he turns to face Yunho with a solemn expression.
“When’s her birthday?”
Yunho’s brow quirks at the same time the tension in his shoulders finally loosens a notch. Sighing softly, he licks his lips and answers.
“Tiny’s?”
Seonghwa nods, the expression on his face unchanging: serious and solemn, as if the situation was as grave as a wake. Hongjoong glances between the two men, his brow now lifted in surprise, but he says nothing.
“It’s been three years since she’s been with us,” Seonghwa murmurs tersely. “But we haven’t celebrated her birthday. The first year I could understand missing it – I mean, she was still adjusting to Ateez, and even after that she’s still a little apprehensive. Not that I blame her, of course – I just… It’s been three full years and I can’t believe we’ve missed her birthday at least three times.”
Yunho’s bottom teeth sink into his lip and his eyes suddenly dart towards the floor. He swallows once, shifting on his feet and sighs as he ponders how to answer Seonghwa’s question. The eldest watches his partner with that same, tense look and his eyes glisten with something sad – something understanding, as if he knows Yunho’s answer before he speaks it aloud.
“I don’t know,” Yunho finally answers quietly. He looks down at his feet, unable to meet his elder’s eyes. His eyes squeeze shut with another sigh that shakes through his shoulders. He repeats himself louder, still just barely above a whisper. “I don’t know.”
Hongjoong steps forward from behind his desk. “What do you mean ‘you don’t know’?”
“I mean I don’t know,” Yunho whispers sadly. “And she doesn’t either.”
Seonghwa licks his lips, grasping at strings as he scrambles to find the right words to say.
“I don’t understand. How can she not know her own birthday?”
Yunho won’t look up from his feet. His fingers curl into fists and the tips of his nails dig into his palms from the tightness of his grip. He can’t bring himself to loosen his hold.
“Tiny, uh… After everything that happened with her – with that village, they don’t particularly regard her… fondly, you know?”
Yunho speaks slowly and methodically, as if trying carefully to pick the right words to say. His tone is terse and cold, the disdain for the village of his past more than evident in his voice. Hongjoong looks up at his partner with a frown still on his lips, his heart pulsing sadly in his chest.
“But she doesn’t know her own birthday? No one in her village told either of you?”
Yunho sighs again, finally looking up at his Captain with grief plastered across his features in an expression neither man can ignore. Seonghwa is already stepping forward, settling an arm over Yunho’s shoulders and rubbing his thumb across the taller man’s jaw.
Yunho leans closer to Seonghwa and continues, voice deep and throaty with the weight of his words. “We celebrated it once. Back when we were young – back when… Daia was still around.”
Hongjoong looks away.
“But even then,” Yunho continues softly, trying not to think of the bony cage casting shadows of your quivering form. You were so young. Little fingers grasped the cold bars that separated him from you, desperately whispering a plea for him to leave. He should have known your father wouldn’t let you celebrate your birthday like he and the other children did. But the smile on your face was so pure, so genuinely happy that he could never utter the words that may wipe it away.
“We didn’t know the exact date – just that she was born in the spring. Her father… well he killed the attendants that assisted her mother through labor. Not that we could prove it, of course. Anyone around for Bug’s birth… isn’t around anymore. And Bug was raised kind of secluded the first few years of her life. No one knows exactly when she was born and her father certainly wouldn’t say.”
Seonghwa’s eyes continue to glisten with that broken look, and he licks his drying lips before he speaks. His heart throbs painfully, echoing the sadness in his face.. “And… after Daia wasn’t around anymore?”
Seonghwa hates that he asks.
Yunho shifts on his feet and looks away again.
“I, uh… I don’t know much of what happened after Daia…” he trails off for a long moment. “By that time, the village and her father turned their backs on Bug, and I… I was exiled a few years later.”
Seonghwa thumbs over Yunho’s jaw again, trying to soothe his lover’s agony. Hongjoong steps closer and lays his hand across Seonghwa’s back, their combined sadness near tangible in the cavern hall.
“Bug’s birthday…” Yunho finally continues. “She’s never seen it as a good thing, you know? Her father and the village certainly didn’t see it that way.”
Seonghwa’s eyes sadden, the shine of his irises dulling at Yunho’s confession. He turns over his shoulder to look at Hongjoong and presses his lips together, as if regretting bringing up the topic altogether.
“A good thing?” Hongjoong whispers.
Yunho shakes his head, his frown dragging down his lips as he breathes softly. “Not something worth celebrating. The day she was born was… the start of everything bad, I guess.”
Seonghwa’s eyes squeeze shut, the burn of tears forcing pressure to build in the corners.
“Sometimes I think,” Yunho whispers tiredly, his eyes cloudy and unfocused as he stares into the distance. “I think she might hate it; that she might despise the day of her birth because of all the pain that came after.”
Hongjoong takes a deep breath in through his nose, trying to soothe the anguish that swells inside his ribs. There’s grief there, rage too, settling in the pit of his stomach and pushing upwards into his chest and throat. It’s not directed at you – it could never be. It’s towards your father, towards your village, towards anyone that has looked at you with disdain and uttered that foul moniker he knows makes you flinch.
“I’m sorry, Yun.”
Yunho shakes his head, leaning into Seonghwa’s hand and looking down at Hongjoong with his eyes glistening with welling tears. He swallows, clearly resisting the urge to cry, and kisses Seonghwa’s thumb when it brushes his mouth. “‘S okay, Seonghwa. I know your intentions were honorable.”
Seonghwa nods, finally leaning forward until his head rests against Yunho’s collarbone. An arm wraps around the eldest’s shoulders and Hongjoong presses himself against Seonghwa’s back, encasing both him and Yunho.
“So don’t bring up her birthday, then?” Hongjoong whispers, frown still drawing his lips downward. He speaks the question into Seonghwa’s shoulder blade, his lips grazing the tunic covering his skin.
Yunho is silent for a long moment. No one speaks and the sounds of their hushed breaths are all that echo through the hollowed cavern. Yunho ponders his Captain’s question in the silence and thinks of your growth in the years you’ve spent in their camp. Would you rather they never mention your birthday again? Or would you appreciate a different kind of memory to replace the shaded pains of the ones long past?
Soon after, Yunho leans forward to bury his face into Seonghwa’s hair before he breathes deeply and pulls back, a small quirk lifting the corner of his lips. He thinks of you and that youthful grin that used to grace your lips more often as a child. Yunho recalls the mischief in your smile and the wonder that would flash across your eyes, and he begins to twist an idea around his thoughts. It’s that look he wants to see again. He always wants to see it; the mischief, the awe, the teasing grin you used to throw over your shoulder to get him to chase you through the training grounds. He wants that so badly.
“Actually, Captain…”
Hongjoong peels his head away from Seonghwa’s shoulder, looking up to meet Yunho’s eyes with a raised brow and a question in his eyes. “Hmm?”
Yunho finally manages a fraction of a smile, stroking his hand over Seonghwa’s shoulders as he speaks.
“I think there might be a way we can show her that her birth is something worth celebrating. I’ll need your help though.”
“Anything.”
“Anything for her,” Seonghwa finishes at the same time Hongjoong speaks.
Yunho’s heart swells. The soft grin on his features begins to stretch, mirrored by his two elders. Pride begins to surge beneath his skin and it makes him feel fuzzy.
“What do you need?” Hongjoong whispers into the fraction of space separating their lips. Yunho huffs a smile, leaning closer until his mouth brushes against his leader’s.
“How do you feel about a little trip, Captain?”
Time passes easily. About a week goes by after the conversation between you, Jongho and Seonghwa before Hongjoong announces that Ateez will be spending a few nights traveling away from camp. He won’t say where they’re traveling to nor why they’re going, but there’s a mischievous grin on his lips when you tilt your head in suspicion. No one will tell you anything about the adventure other than handing you a cloth pack to gather some things for the trip.
Mingi helps you clean your blades and slides them into the scabbards on your back for you. Seonghwa packs food away carefully and slides extra servings of dried and cured meats into your pack followed by the fruit he knows you and Jongho love. San and Yeosang sit by your side as you help sort the first aid supplies the camp may need. The inky vines wrapping around Yeosang’s forearms flashes from beneath his sleeves, and you find yourself following the sight of the tattoo each time you peek a glimpse of golden skin covered in leafy shapes.
San laughs and raises an eyebrow at his lover when he flicks his shirt above his waistband playfully, showcasing the span of scales descending over his hip and up his waist. He giggles when you reach forward to pull his shirt higher over his side, eager to follow the lines of ink up his torso. San pushes your hands away and promises to show you one day. Wooyoung enters the cavern a moment later and exchanges a knowing look with San, as if the same pattern of obsidian scales crawls up the opposite side of his own torso.
On the morning Hongjoong announced their leave, you pack the last of your things diligently in the cloth pack given to you. There’s something fond rippling through your chest as you slide a hand over the large tunic laid across your bed.
The sensation seeps all the way down to your toes, a bittersweet happiness that arose from the realization that you’ve never… owned things before.
In that village, nothing was ever yours. It was always stolen or taken, never owned.
But now…
Now there’s all kinds of things in your corner of the medical cavern. There’s the little rope of twine with eight little beads Yeosang gave you to fiddle with so you wouldn’t pick and pull at your nails. There’s the bear-hide blanket Jongho handmade when you started to grow cold in the winter nights. A pile of spare clothes tailored to fit your size sits beneath your bed. A hollowed shell of smooth, rich cream sits beside you, specially made for you by Wooyoung and San when they noticed your scars were particularly aching in the cold weather. There’s a whetstone and cleaning tools beside your swords, left there by Mingi when he noticed your blades were dulling. Seonghwa always leaves a myriad of flowers beside your bed each week, and the dried stems of all his past bouquets hang above your on a piece of twine Joong brought you. There’s armor and chainmail beneath your bed, presented by Hongjoong with a shy smile. He cleans them for you when he thinks you’re not looking, ensuring the armor stays in good shape and protects you well. One of Yunho’s thicker tunics lies at the foot of your bed, a staple of your growing closet of clothes. He knows you like having his scent nearby. There’s books too, ones from the medical cavern and ones from Wooyoung, who you’ve discovered is quite the avid reader.
There’s just… all sorts of things.
And you’ve never really owned things before. It’s strange. And quite enjoyable, you decide.
You like owning things. You like being part of Ateez – being part of a family.
With your lips twitching upwards into a fond smile, you stand with the last of your belongings and slide the straps of your cloth pack over your shoulders. It sits a little strangely on your back but you huff and step out of the cavern anyway.
The rest of Ateez is already outside, shuffling the last of their belongings into storage and closing up the cave system behind you. A wooden sort of door slides shut behind you and the viny, earthen cover falls over it. It’s perfectly concealed from the wild, appearing just like any other cropping of rocks and stone. You marvel at their ingenuity and turn to find Wooyoung approaching you with a smile on his lips.
“Good morning, Bug. Are you ready?”
Your head tilts with a question as Wooyoung’s hands shift upwards to the straps of your pack. He raises a brow once, always asking for permission before he touches, and you shift closer and slide your hands onto his hips with a nod of your head. Wooyoung’s smile seems to widen, if at all possible, and he carefully begins to adjust the straps of your pack so it sits better across your back. Your gaze follows his hands, tracing over the fading scar on his one wrist – the space where a rusty shackle used to sit. Your lips quirk happily at the sight of the missing metal cuff, now long buried in the earth. He hums happily at the feeling of your hands on his waist, and chuckles beneath his breath when he feels your hands attempting to weasel under his shirt – likely another attempt to get a look at the tattoo you know sits there.
Wooyoung huffs a breath as you skate a gentle hand over his bare hip, focusing on the wavy shape of an oscillating line your draw over his skin. He translates the word as ‘what’ and understands your inquisition to mean ‘Ready for what?’
“Can’t tell you,” he laughs, his chest shaking with the motion as you squeeze his hip in retaliation. “Sorry, baby. Captain’s orders; take it up with Hongjoong if you want to know so badly.”
Your one eye rolls and Wooyoung laughs again, that bright, cackling sound echoing through the trees in a burst of noise that makes your heart flutter. You like Wooyoung’s laugh.
“C’mon you two!” Hongjoong calls from a distance, already beginning to pace towards the southwest. “We’re burning daylight. Let’s get moving.”
You respond with a choked hum despite knowing your Captain can’t hear it. Wooyoung grins, finally satisfied with the adjustments he’s made on your pack, and turns over his shoulder to call back, “We’re coming, Captain. Relax a little. It’s barely dawn, we’re on schedule.”
You don’t need to see Hongjoong to know what expression the Captain has on his face. A tiny smile appears on your lips and when Wooyoung turns back to face you with a hand held out in offering, his grin beams once more.
“C’mon, baby. You wanna walk with me and Sannie today?”
Your answering nod is a little too eager, but Wooyoung doesn’t mention it.
To you, anyway. The smug grin he shoots over his shoulder at Mingi and Yunho is met with a sigh and an eye roll. The vulgar gesture Mingi throws back goes unseen by you too.
Seonghwa sees it though, and the sound of Mingi’s squawk when he’s slapped across the shoulder by the archer makes Wooyoung laugh again.
It’s springtime. The forest is filled with bright shades of emerald green and flowers have begun to sprout along patches of sunlight. Lupin tickle at your ankles when you pass and you watch their lilac and lavender petals sway in the wind with a fond expression. Your last bouquet from Seonghwa was fresh Lupin flowers, a growing favorite of yours he has noticed.
Wooyoung holds your hand as you walk, sometimes shifting to allow San to take his place. They talk happily as you stride through the forest, following Yeosang and Jongho as they lead your band of warriors through the trees. You still don’t know where you’re going nor why you’re going there, but you trust your Captain and you trust your family.
Eventually, you unlink your hands from San to step ahead and walk besides Mingi and Yunho. San’s resounding pout and soft sigh are lost on you, but Wooyoung slides his hand into his partner’s empty fingers with a grin and a teasing poke to San’s side. Mingi intertwines his fingers with yours with a beaming grin and a happy chuckle, swinging your hands between you as you walk. He points out the flora and fauna he recognizes along the hike, explaining their uses as he recalls Yeosang’s teachings. He mentions the honey-haired healer’s tattoo sleeve of medicinal herbs and shows you some of the plants he recognizes to be inked into Yeosang’s skin. You eagerly categorize the leaves and petals of each plant, hoping that you’ll one day be able to find each one decorating Yeosang’s skin.
The first night away from camp is spent sleeping beneath the stars.
Your group of nine lays huddled together in a clearing in the pines, with a small fire burning quietly in the center for warmth. Shifts for watch are assigned and you find yourself curling between Yunho and San that night with a promise to take the final watch with Seonghwa. With cicadas clicking in the distance and a cool breeze rustling the branches above you, you find sleep easy that night. Strangely enough, despite resting out in the open with no cover around, you find you can sleep calmly. Nestled between your Yunho and your San, their body heat keeping you warm even underneath the fur blankets swaddled around you, you feel safe enough to sink into a well-earned sleep. You know the others will wake you if there’s trouble lurking about. They would never let anything happen to their family.
The next day is spent between Hongjoong and Seonghwa, happily listening to their stories and eagerly nudging the both of them to show you some of the ink decorating their skin. Once you found out about Yeosang’s tattoos, there was nothing holding you back from asking the others about their own. Seonghwa relents with a teasing grin towards Hongjoong, showing you the pattern of large scales that crawl up his forearms. You trace the delicate scales with a happy sound, not noticing the shiver that crawls down Seonghwa’s spine. Hongjoong rolls his eyes at his partner, but he almost wishes to show you the ink decorating his back and spine too. He only waves you away with a laugh when you turn to him with a tilt of your head and a happy question on your lips.
That night you sleep between Yeosang and Jongho, one of your legs wedged between the youngest’s and your hand clumsily intertwined between the healer’s fingers. This time, the nine of you settle in a cliff alcove, sheltered from the fog and the light drizzle of rain that spatters through the forest around midnight.
There’s no telling how far you’ve traveled from Ateez’s hollow. It’s been two days of mostly hiking and stopping for breaks and meals, but you’ve long grown used to strenuous labor so the walk is not nearly as difficult as you once thought it to be. You still have little to no knowledge on your destination as your Captain is tight-lipped about the matter. He only gives you soft smiles and quiet laughter when you nag him about where or why you’ve left camp.
On the third and last day of your long journey, you walk between Yeosang and Jongho at the front of your pack. The two have been leading you for three days, seeming to know the way without needing a map or compass. Every once and a while, Yeosang looks up at the night sky and lifts a hand to palm at the stars. You understand he must be checking your position, ensuring that they’re still on the right path, but you don’t ask. You find Polaris winking down at you each night with a fondness in your chest, and you give her a gentle, barely-there smile each time you see her.
The healer and his partner pace through the trees with newfound urgency that morning. The two members eagerly shuffle through the trees with beaming grins and an energy that you cannot help but mimic. They’re excited about something – unfathomably so.
“We’re almost there, honey,” Yeosang encourages you, holding out a hand to help you scale the final boulder before you begin your descent back down the mountainside. “Just another mile or so, I promise.”
You trust him.
The others have begun to feed on the buzzing atmosphere building in the group. There’s tension simmering, but a good kind, as if there’s something awaiting your family at your destination. You don’t know what it is, but it must be something good if they’re eagerly beginning to quicken the pace.
Soon after you begin your descent down the small mountain, the dense foliage of pine trees and packed soil gives way to something softer – something you’ve never quite seen or felt before. It’s pliable and squishy beneath your feet, allowing your weight to sink into the material with each step. It leaves footprints in your wake, the ground shifting and moving beneath your feet.
Sand.
It’s sand.
You know it’s sand because Yeosang has some collected in a small jar in the medical cavern. You’ve never seen it before: sand or the sea. You found the tiny bottle of eroded stone once and carefully examined it with a puzzled expression until Yeosang found you. The miniscule grains of rock and shell shifted in the bottle as Yeosang explained where it was from.
You listened to him for hours that day.
He talked about the sea and his life as a captain of his own ship from the hour of the sun’s peak until it descended beneath the horizon. You were fascinated. Eagerly hanging onto every single one of his words, you listened to Yeosang with a rapture you couldn’t describe. He spoke of the ocean and the smell of salt in the fresh air, mentioning that there was a particular hint of something so ocean-like in the scent that he couldn't begin to describe. Yeosang described the sand and the shore, detailing how the plush sand like the stuff in his bottle gave way to harder packed ground the closer you grew to the sea. He talked of how it felt to play in the waves and to feel the cool touch of the ocean on his skin.
You marveled at him for hours, longing desperately to one day know the smell he spoke of, to feel the ocean breeze tickle your skin and to feel its waves brush against your feet.
It sounded wonderful.
So when the sand beneath your feet begins to thicken, giving way to clumsier footsteps and the sound of something roaring in the distance, you perk upwards.
Your entire body slams to a halt, startling San who walks behind you. Jerking upwards, your one eye darts over to Yeosang, who stands with Jongho at his side, already looking at you. There’s this look in their eyes; something fond and gentle – an expression you’ve begun to recognize. They watch you as you begin to piece together the information you’ve gathered of this little trip, smiles on their faces as you realize where they’ve taken you.
At your side, San begins to bend forward, his hands reaching out to pull at the laces of your boots and chuckling beneath his breath. You reach out to stabilize yourself on his shoulder as you make a sound of confusion.
‘What’s going on?’ you try to question without speaking.
At your back, Yunho runs a hand down your spine and soothes the tension in your shoulders. You reach back, grasping his hand with a strength that surprises you and draw that oscillating squiggle across the back of his hand with a bewildered expression.
‘What’s happening?’
There’s another word you want to say. One you don’t have a translation for. A word you’ve never spoken or seen.
Ocean. The sea.
You don’t have a word for it.
But you can smell it now. That salty, fresh sort of scent with a hint of something you cannot place. Just like Yeosang described.
The sea.
San taps your leg, garnering your attention and helping you lift your foot so you can place it on his knee. He’s kneeling at your feet, one leg propped up to lift your foot and the other in the sand beneath him. The healer pulls at your laces, beginning to untie your shoes and pull them from your feet with a grin.
“C’mon, sweetheart,” he murmurs with that low timber that makes you shiver. “Let’s get these off.”
Your held tilts in confusion. Seonghwa chuckles behind you, leaning into Mingi’s side and shooting a look over at Wooyoung. “Gotta take your shoes off unless you want sand in the soles, Bug. It’ll be a pain to walk back with all that in ‘em. I promise you’ll never be able to get it all out.”
Hongjoong laughs from beside Jongho, the Captain throwing his head back with a knowing grin. “Speaking from experience, huh, darling?”
Seonghwa rolls his eyes and ignores his lover, dropping a hand to intertwine with Wooyoung’s. The younger eagerly locks their fingers together, smiling happily and leaning his head onto Seonghwa’s shoulder as you process everything.
The others begin to pull off their own shoes, tying them to their packs or holding the laces in their fingers. Mingi laughs and pushes Wooyoung when he bends over to undo his laces, and when Wooyoung stumbles, he shouts indignantly and lurches upwards for revenge. Seonghwa laughs and tries to settle them, only to end up yanked out of the way by a grinning Yeosang. Wooyoung and Mingi screech at each other, beginning to race down the sand towards the roaring sound that continues to swell in the distance.
You worriedly look down at San, his dark irises already looking up at you with adoration swirling behind them. The healer pulls off your sock and carefully sets your foot back onto the sand, watching as you marvel at the plush, cool material beneath the soles of your feet.
“C’mon, tiny,” Yunho laughs behind you, chest rumbling as he speaks. The vibration echoes through your back from how close the warrior is pressed against you. He grins when you shiver pleasantly. “We’ve gotta catch up.”
San lifts your other foot delicately and places it on his waiting knee, repeating the process of taking off your shoe and sock before he ties the laces together and stores them away in his pack. Before he sets your foot back onto the sand, San’s eyes twinkle with something mischievous.
He leans forward and drags his fingers across the skin of your calf, eyes crinkling as he smiles. You look back down at him with your stomach fluttering pleasantly, watching as San leans forward and presses his lips to the side of your calf.
Oh.
His lips skate over the muscle and his hand rests where your thigh connects with the knee. You feel your breathing still. Air catches in your lungs, and some burst of emotion lurches into your throat as you stop and stare down at the healer with one widened eye. You can feel the smile on San’s soft lips as he drags his mouth from your calf to your knee, kissing your skin sweetly as he goes. He drifts over scars both fresh and faded, but does not stop moving as he ascends up your calf. San leaves a trail of goosebumps in his wake, your skin practically shivering under his touch and lighting ablaze when he pulls away.
Oh.
You stare open-mouthed at the healer when San finally slides a hand down your leg and deposits it onto the sand. You lick your lips once, trying desperately to come up with words to say, but there’s nothing. Just the trail of blazing heat San left behind and a roaring fire beginning to spread inside your chest. You can practically feel the heat in your face, and you lift a hand to palm at your cheek as San watches with a teasing grin. Your figure practically vibrates as you shiver through the emotion bursting through you.
“San…”
Said healer mimics your shiver as you whisper his name, fingers dancing along your calf before he stops. He presses one final kiss to your knee, at the crease of the joint, and this time your eye slides shut with a shiver. The plush feeling of his lips against your skin is ambrosia for your soul and the barest touch of moisture is left behind when he finally pulls away.
He looks up at you with honey in his irises, hand skating down your calf once more and smiles.
“C’mon, Bug. We’ve got places to be,” he teases, saccharine timber never failing to make you melt.
As if he wasn’t the one distracting you.
Finally, you’re able to squeeze his shoulder thankfully and San beams up at you in the way that makes those sweet little dimples poke out of his cheeks. You nearly lean forward to caress a finger of the indents that make your heart mushy, but still as the cool sand sinks between your toes.
It’s… soft.
The sand melts beneath your soles like butter, cradling your heels and caressing your skin like silk. You wiggle your toes and awe at the feeling, watching the sand shift and move with your lips just barely parted in wonder. San watches from your feet, his gentle eyes roaming over your partly-concealed face and grinning at the expression plastered across your features. Your lips are parted, but just barely, taking deep breaths to inhale the fresh air of the sea breeze and one eye dilated with awe. San's heart thumps vibrantly beneath his ribs, a song of your name. It calls out to you sweetly, and San swears that when he runs his hand across the bare skin of your leg, brushing over scars and broken skin, he can hear your heart call his name in return.
Your one eye darts upwards to meet your Captain’s gaze.
Hongjoong stares at you with some ineffable softness in his expression. He reaches a hand out to grasp your fingers, helping you step forward away from San. The healer stands from his kneeling position, his own footwear now missing, and joins you at your side.
“You like it?” Hongjoong whispers as you near.
The vigorous nod of your head is almost comical, and Hongjoong chuckles beneath his breath. Yes. Yes you like it.
San beams at your side, unable to stop the mirthful sound of his laughter. It erupts from his chest in that giggling way that you adore. You tilt your head to look at him, your chest swelling and heart thumping with the tumultuous feelings surging within you. San reaches out to run a hand down your arm and you lean close offering a single line of ‘thanks’ across his palm.
Yunho leans forward and pecks a kiss across your forehead, directly over the mask concealing the right half of your face and then turns to walk after Wooyoung and Mingi, San at his heels. He doesn’t acknowledge the kiss, but your heart jumps into your throat regardless. Your fingers itch to follow him, twitching in an attempt to reach for him, but you turn back to your Captain instead.
Hongjoong is still looking at you, that ineffable softness still radiating from him. “C’mon, angel. Let’s go see the ocean.”
You’ve never been more excited.
Hongjoong begins pulling you in the direction the others have disappeared in, following them over the dunes of sand. At first, he pulls your awestruck figure behind him as you make your way through the deeping sand, turning back to watch you marvel at the grains of white and cream colored grains. Your feet drag, slowing the two of you down as you continue to look down at the sand beneath you. At one point, you can’t resist the temptation and you stop, carefully pulling your hand from Hongjoong’s to bend at the knees and drop into the sand.
“Woah, angel!” Hongjoong gasps as you let go of his hand and urgently drop into the earth below. “Careful!”
Dragging your fingers through the silky material, you watch the tiny pieces of sediment cascade back into the hills beneath you as they trail between your fingers. The sand is cool to the touch and gentle as it scratches against your skin. You thought it would be rough, but it’s not. Not this sand anyway.
Seonghwa chuckles behind you, stopping to drop his hands beneath your shoulders and gently lift you back up to your feet. The others are little specks in the distance, just a few hundred yards away. The eldest carefully sets you on your feet and slides a hand down to intertwine with your own.
“C'mon, lovebug. We haven’t even reached the good part yet.”
The good part? You wonder. How could it possibly get any better than this?
But as the crashing sound gets louder with each step you take and the smell of salt continues to grow stronger, you begin to realize what the good part is.
Soon after, it becomes you dragging Hongjoong and Seonghwa through the sand dunes. Eagerly tugging them behind you as you race towards the others, you sink into the sand and stumble a few times, only catching yourself when either member scrambles to grab your waist. You push quicker through the deepening sand each time you right yourself, racing through the dunes until you finally see it.
The sea.
And you stop moving.
Hongjoong and Seonghwa nearly crash into your back as you freeze, body halting at the top of the sand dune. Your one eye is transfixed on the view before you, mouth parted and body slack with awe.
Waves are crashing along the shore, breaking into foamy surf as they collide with the cream-colored sand. There are little birds with thin, long legs dancing in the shoreline, pecking at things in the packed sand. You watch with fascination as they rush away in a flock from an oncoming wave. When the foam finally settles, they return to their feeding grounds, continuing to peck away at something beneath the darker sand. The smell of salt fills your senses and there’s a brush of water against your skin as a breeze carries a mist of salt onto the shoreline.
You’ve never seen so much… color before.
The ocean is blue. Green too, and teal and dark and bright, and every color in the range you can possibly think of. It’s aquamarine in the peaks of crashing waves and a darker cyan in the deepness of the salty water. There’s pale blue, creamy skies and even paler cream-colored clouds. You nearly wish you could reach out and touch one.
It’s wonderful. And it’s so much more than you think you deserve.
With awe on your features and mouth slightly parted, you stare mystified at the sea before you. Hongjoong steps up beside you, the others starting to circle back to stand nearby. They just stand there… watching you for a minute.
They watch your one pupil dilate and your expression softens into wonderous glee. Their hands intertwine with each other, fingers squeezing one another and hearts thumping happily in their chests. There’s pride there, and affection too, roaring madly beneath their skin and calling out to the sea with a throaty, triumphant call.
You like it. You like the sea.
And they like you.
Hongjoong slides a hand down your arm until he can gently link your scarred fingers with his own. Your attention briefly shifts away from the sea to look over at your captain.
His soft brown hair rustles as the sea breeze flutters through the strands, and Hongjoong smiles. Eyes scrunching into a beaming grin, the one that you like so much, he offers a squeeze of your palm. The scar crossing his one eye moves with his expression and you adore the way it looks when he smiles. Chocolate brown irises flicker in the brightness of the sunlight and for a moment, you think you much prefer the color of his eyes than the enchanting blue-green of the sea.
But it’s tough competition, of course.
Hongjoong squeezes your hand once more, fully drawing your attention back to him, and he leans close to carefully grasp the side of your face. His palm gently cups your mask, stroking his thumb over the tough material with a delicateness you cannot fathom deserving. But he touches you regardless, even if it's the mask instead of your skin. Hongjoong doesn’t care that you continue to wear it. None of them do. It’s a part of you, and they’ll continue to care for you all the same.
“Are you happy?” The Captain inquires, licking his lips as he watches you.
The vigor in your nod nearly makes him laugh. His beaming grin only seems to widen and you find yourself stunned at how beautiful he looks happy.
“Yeah? That’s good. I’m glad you’re happy, angel.”
You want to ask something else. Something about why your little clan has ventured this far or perhaps something else, but you can’t begin to find the words for it.
You don’t need to though.
Hongjoong leans closer, his warm, umber eyes scanning your features as he whispers something only for you to hear.
“Happy birthday, Bug.”
You barely register the sentiment before your captain leans forward and gently presses his lips to the crown of your head.
You don’t breathe. Too frightened that any movement will force him to pull away, you stay remarkably still and stare numbly into Hongjoong’s chest.
His lips linger for a long moment against your hairline, and you feel the warmth of his exhale against your scalp. The feeling makes your stomach flutter pleasantly and suddenly your body feels like you’re going to vibrate out of sheer enjoyment. Another shiver tickles its way up your spine and you finally exhale shakily. Reaching a hand upwards, you clutch onto the hand Hongjoong has still cupping your cheek.
Her heart finally throbs with a dull ache.
Your birthday?
You didn’t even think…
Hongjoong exhales softly and bends to drop a second kiss onto your mask, just above where your right eye would be. It throbs suddenly, but not so painfully this time.
Your birthday.
They came all this way for you?
All of this… leaving the camp, walking all this way, spending nights on the road, showing you the sea for the first time… they did this to celebrate your birthday?
Your heart hurts.
No one has ever done that for you before.
You suppose Yunho and Daia tried once… but that didn’t end so well. Salt wells behind your one eye and your lip twitches just once, but it's enough for Hongjoong to catch. Your chest aches with the memory of your mother. It’s a hurt you could never quite soothe.
The Captain’s smile is still bright when he pulls away but there’s a sadness beneath the joy. No, not sadness, you suppose. Something empathetic – something… bittersweet.
Hongjoong knows. They all do.
“My birthday?” Your mouth parts to let out the croaked sound. Your voice has gotten better. The deeper, rough tone of your voice has begun to fade after finally learning to use it again. It’s beginning to return to what it used to be – slow and steadily.
From behind you, Yeosang hums deeply. You recognize the sound without turning to look at him. His voice always carries that undertone of sweet and smooth honey, and you can’t find any other way to describe it.
“Yeah, honey. You told me you’ve never seen the sea, right? We thought it would make a good birthday present.”
The healer is standing behind Hongjoong, San and Wooyoung at his sides and the rest of Ateez just beyond. They’re all here. For you.
You shift on your feet, barely able to restrain the wetness of your one eye as you attempt to face them. Your heart still throbs, but it’s more of a pleasant ache – a good one. A sea breeze rustles your hair. Three silver rings click against your mask; a comforting sound that reminds you of home – of Yunho. The scent of salt in the air fills you with warmth and the silky sand beneath your feet cradles you in the earth’s gentle hands. The world itself seems to wrap around you in its kindness, delicately embracing you as if asking for forgiveness.
It feels like your mother – like the hugs you can barely remember.
The burn of tears returns tenfold.
You’ve never celebrated your birthday before. It was never a day others regarded with joy, so you supposed it was only fair to see it the same way. You don’t even really know what day you were born. Father never told you – he never told anyone.
But… perhaps this day – the day Ateez has chosen for you – can be your birthday. Maybe this time it doesn’t have to be a bad thing anymore.
“We wanted to show you something new. Something good. Do you like it?” Wooyoung whispers as you process your feelings. His voice is apprehensive, as if he isn’t quite sure how you’ll respond to celebrating your birthday. You can barely hear him over the roaring sound of waves colliding with the shoreline and birds peeping in the surf.
You’re already throwing yourself into Wooyoung’s arms before a moment of silence can pass. You crash into his chest with a crooned sound, a desperate cry of joy.
“Yes!” You finally croak, the word sounding more like a sob than an agreement. “Yes, I like it!”
Wooyoung laughs happily as he wraps his arms around your waist, burying his face into the crook of your neck with a joyful sound. His chest vibrates with his laughter and you love the way it feels against your body. One of your hands slides out from between you and you urgently grasp ahold of Yeosang’s shirt and tug him into your pile with a quick movement. San follows soon after, lured in by Wooyoung’s touch and suddenly you’re buried beneath a mountain of Ateez’s warmth.
Another wet sob leaves your lips, but it’s much closer to a laugh this time.
“I love it…”
And we love you.
He doesn’t say it aloud, but Wooyoung hopes you hear it anyway.
Seonghwa lets out a hearty laugh despite it sounding wet with his own tears, and he wraps an arm around Hongjoong’s shoulders as he tugs his captain close. The leader’s eyes are watery as he and the archer pile into your embrace. Mingi and Yunho follow quickly after, with the tallest of the two reaching out to snag Jongho’s tunic. The youngest is already moving, sliding beneath Yeosang’s arm to nuzzle into the healer’s side. One of his hands nestles between his lover’s ribs, resting atop your bicep. You push closer into their hands, warm and happy and still softly crying.
You love it.
It cannot possibly get any better than this. Not even the comforting breeze of the ocean air brushing over your skin nor the warmth of any roaring campfire could rival this feeling. There’s no warmth in the world that can surmount the heat of Ateez embracing you. Their hands carefully sweeping over skin leaves trails of pleasant heat in their wake, and the throb of your aching heart is only soothed by a soft coo leaving San’s lips. Wooyoung slides a hand over your head, pulling you closer into his neck, and you feel a bigger hand – Yunho’s, you know – scratch gently over your scalp. Another settles onto your hip, rubbing gentle circles into the bone. They’re Seonghwa’s, you recognize the calluses on his two fingers when they brush over the skin of your bare hip. Mingi’s hand settles across your back, resting between your shoulder blades. His firm touch and big hands are easy to decipher. Jongho’s wrap around your arm, strong and steadfast, just like you know him to be. Your captain’s smaller hand finds your fingers, sliding between them as you grip onto San with a fierce grip.
Hongjoong’s hands tremble when he twists his grip to drag a line down your left ring finger. His gaze finds yours, a watery smile on his lips when your mouth parts in shock and your one eye dilated beyond comprehension. The Captain finishes drawing the line at the tip of your nail, where each of his fingers meets the end of each of yours. Then Hongjoong slides his hand into yours and squeezes three times.
Yunho must have taught him that one.
Because no one else has ever uttered those words to you – least of all meant them.
Your grip tightens fervently, pulling until you can press Hongjoong’s hand into your chest and let him feel the racing pulse of your heart. It slams into your ribs with a thunderous pace, beating in a pattern you hope he can discern. You pull your head from Wooyoung’s neck just slightly. Just enough to lean down and press your lips to Hongjoong’s fingers.
You hope he knows what it means.
He does.
“Happy birthday, tiny,” Yunho murmurs into the shared space between the nine of you. “We’re so happy you’re here.”
You weep.
Ateez spends three nights and four days at the beach.
On the first, you don’t have the courage to venture too far into the shore. The roaring of waves crashing onto the sand is intimidating when you don’t know how to swim. You settle for watching the others splash and wrestle in the shallow sea. Their shouts of glee are enough joy to warm your heart.
You watch Mingi grapple with Hongjoong on the shoreline, huffing softly with a grin when Mingi inevitably gets the upper hand. The guard lifts Hongjoong over his shoulder and laughs deeply as he storms his way towards the sea.
“Put me down!” Hongjoong roars, smacking his hand against Mingi’s back. “Mingi!”
The guard only laughs and spins the two of them in the shallows as he wades deeper into the waves.
“Don’t you dare!”
You watch as Mingi laughs brightly once more, calling out a “too late!” as he unceremoniously dumps his captain into the sea.
Hongjoong dunks beneath the water with a roar, and for a moment you worry he won’t emerge again. He does, however, and lurches from the waves with an undignified shout and lunges towards Mingi as he laughs.
“Get back here!”
You grin and watch the two continue to wrestle in the waves.
Jongho takes you onto the nearby rocks and shows you the wonders of tide pools. He and Yeosang spent years living by the sea, and he murmurs hundreds of little facts about each of the animals he can find. Crouching down by a shallow pool, Jongho reaches into the cool water and ever so carefully lifts a sea star from the water. He cradles it delicately, leaving it half submerged as he pulls you closer with his other hand.
“This is a sea star,” he whispers, looking up at you and gesturing for you to crouch beside him. “You want to feel? You won’t hurt it.”
When you crouch at his side, Jongho pulls your hand towards him with a smile. Bent at the knees, you lean into his side and watch with a bated breath and marvel at the texture of the sea star still carefully held in Jongho’s hands. It’s soft and squishy beneath your delicate touch and you huff a smile as you watch with a mystified expression.
You watch some of the tiny feet of the sea star wiggle in Jongho’s hand and whip your head over to face him with a question on your lips.
Jongho is already looking at you, watching you instead of the sea star in his hands. He’s smiling, softly and sweetly, his eyes fixed on your one eye. They drift from your left one to where your right would be if not hidden behind the mask, then he drops them to your lips. Your breath stutters and you swallow shyly before Jongho lifts his eyes back to your own.
He smiles, as if nothing happened and continues, “See the poky creatures down here? The ones that look like they have needles? Those are urchins. The sea stars will eat those.”
It takes more effort than you’d like to admit to pull your gaze away from Jongho’s face.
At another tidal pool, Jongho points out a creature he calls an anemone. The vibrant teal and green color of its shape mystifies you and you lean closer to investigate it. Listening carefully to Jongho’s explanation of the anemone, you look back up at him with a question in your eyes.
“Yeah, you can touch that one too. Be careful though.”
You don’t understand his warning but carefully drop your hand into the pool to delicately caress the anemone anyway. The chill waters surround your skin and you lean closer to touch the creature, you let out a startled squeal when its sticky tentacles wrap themselves around your finger. Surprised, you lurch away from the pool, confusion in your face and hands braced on the rock beside you.
Jongho laughs so hard you think he might choke.
You turn to look at him with furrowed brows and an upset pout on your lips, a little disgruntled Jongho didn’t tell you that would happen.
The youngest continues to laugh at the utter confusion in your expression, finally bracing himself against you and apologizing.
“Sorry, I’m sorry, Bug. I couldn’t help myself!”
You frown and push gently at his chest, posing a little miffed at Jongho’s teasing. The youngest snorts and pulls you closer to his chest, wrapping an arm around your shoulder.
“I won’t do it again, I promise,” he laughs. “We should wash your hands though, the stingers on those anemones can leave toxins on your skin. I don’t want you to touch your face without cleaning your hands first.”
You huff and nod, letting him lead you away from the rocks and towards the others. When you find San, you race away from Jongho and bury yourself into his chest with a pretend pout. The healer wraps you up in his embrace without question, turning to look at Jongho with a raised brow. Jongho rolls his eyes and laughs.
Seonghwa and Wooyoung take you to collect shells in the afternoon.
Your footprints linger in the sand behind you as you hold the archer’s hand and walk along the shoreline. The sand is packed beneath your feet closer to the shore and you find that there are all sorts of different shells just above the water line.
You recognize some of the larger, smoother shells Yeosang and San use to store medicine sometimes. They’re scallop-shaped and hollow in the middle, and the healers like to use them for creams or other ointments. Seonghwa helps you carry some back to the healers who gratefully pile your collection into one of their packs. They can always use more shells in the medical cavern.
Further down the beach, you find a plethora of smaller shells and drop down into the sand to rummage through them. There’s hundreds of them, some twisting into points and others round at the edges. Some are still split into pieces and others are still whole. Some are closed like a locket. Seonghwa tells you to leave those ones alone – there’s still creatures living in those ones. You gasp and carefully set the shell back down into the sand ever so delicately. The archer smiles fondly at your care for the earth and her creatures.
One of the bigger shells that washes up on the shore catches your attention, and you rush over to the pristine, cream colored object. Yeosang called these conches. When you excitedly turn over the shell, you’re startled to find a spiny looking creature inside. A large claw grazes your hand and your heart lurches.
You shout in surprise, jerking away from the shell with a gasp.
“Bug?!”
Seonghwa is at your side in an instant, hands on your back and pulling you away from the shell. “What happened?”
He doesn’t know why you shouted at first, too worried something has hurt you. His hands slide across your shoulders, turning you to face him and urgently scanning you for injuries. But when he looks down at the crab claw emerging from the shell, Seonghwa feels his chest shake with quiet laughter. Your head jerks back to look at the archer.
“It’s alright, darling. You just startled the crab living inside this one. He won’t hurt you, honey.”
Each shell you turn over for the rest of the day is done carefully and gently, and Seonghea feels his heart tug affectionately at how cute you look doing so. You nudge one with a stick to see if any claws come out and Seonghwa has to bury his smile in Wooyoung’s shoulder.
“She’s so precious,” the warrior murmurs under his breath.
Seonghwa hums in agreement, his head lifting from his partner’s shoulder to find you waving them over excitedly.
“We’re coming, sweetheart!”
Wooyoung settles at your side with a grin and looks down at the smooth stones in your hands. There’s a few rocks mixed in with the more ornate looking shells you’ve gathered, and Wooyoung tilts his head in an attempt to decipher why you’ve called them over.
“What’s goin’ on?”
Seonghwa’s heart stutters at the beaming smile on your lips. You smile more and this is not the first he’s ever seen, but each time you look up at him with that grin on your face, Seonghwa feels his stomach flutter and pride swell from his gut. He almost bites down on his bottom lip to resist sending you back a grin of his own, but Seonghwa doesn’t. And he’s grateful he does, because the way your one eye crinkles with joy when he smiles down at you makes his cheeks burn and his skin tingle.
“Look!” You urgently whisper, swallowing around the word to repress how sore your throat is.
Directing his attention to the dark stones in your hands, Seonghwa’s brows furrow in confusion.
“I don’t understand.”
You lift the stone beside his face, pulling Wooyoung into your side as you do. The two of you face Seonghwa as the archer grows more confused. The dark brown, near ebony-colored stone is lifted just beside his temple and you watch with a marveled expression as you shift your gaze from the rock to his eyes.
“What is it?” Seonghwa urges.
Wooyoung grins, his teeth flashing as he laughs sweetly. His two-toned hair ruffles in the breeze and Wooyoung turns to face you, squeezing your hip as he slides an arm around you.
“That’s a good find, Bug,” he murmurs, looking back up at Seonghwa with honey in his gaze. “The same shade as his eyes. It matches him perfectly.”
You nearly vibrate with happiness, wiggling a little in Wooyoung’s arms as Seonghwa’s eyes crinkle. “Really?”
You nod fervently, reaching for his hand and dropping the smooth stone into his hand and curling his fingers around it. Seonghwa holds the rock carefully, not looking away from your one eye as he lifts it to press into his heart.
“Thank you, darling.”
You smile again, just a little twitch of your lips and nod. Then you turn to Wooyoung and weasel your way out of his grip to hold another up for him. This stone is a similar shade as Seonghwa’s, but just different enough that Seonghwa can see where you’ve matched this one to the exact hue of Wooyoung’s umber irises.
You hold it out to Wooyoung with a tilt of your head and Wooyoung has to resist the urge to lean forward and squish your cheeks. He’s rarely seen you so excited – so… at ease. It makes every muscle in his body eager with the urge to hold you close and squeeze you tight.
“For me?”
You nod excitedly and Wooyoung accepts the stone with a skip of his pulse. “Thank you, baby.”
He and Seonghwa exchange looks and Wooyoung slips the stone into his pocket, where he knows he’ll keep it safe.
“Help me?” You whisper softly, gesturing to the plethora of stones and shells beneath you. “For the others.”
“Of course.”
The two help you find six more stones, one of each of the other members of Ateez. Each one is the exact shade of their eyes – colors you know by heart.
Wooyoung cannot tell you that after the trip, the rest of the boys gather to look at the stones and shells you collected for them. He doesn’t tell you that Mingi finds some twine and they braid bands for each other, carefully depositing their gifts onto string and binding them to each other’s wrists.
On the first night, the nine of you sleep around a bonfire.
The crackling flames keep you warm from the evening’s cool breeze, but you don’t think you sleep at all. The excitement and pure glee from the day keeps you awake. Adrenaline still roars through your veins and you settle for watching the stars for a moment longer. You find the twinkling shape of Polaris easily, and whisper your thanks up at her, just like you do every night since Jongho pointed her out.
She winks back.
The fire continues to crackle and the smell of wood burning soothes your nerves. Eventually, you pull yourself from your bed roll, carefully maneuvering away from Yunho’s warm chest and wrap your blanket around your shoulders. Quietly, you make your way over to the massive piece of driftwood facing the shore.
Then, you drop silently beside Mingi, who sits and watches the sea. It’s technically his watch, but the guard faces the ocean as if he cannot bring himself to look away.
Mingi does not startle when you find your place at his side, only shifting slightly to allow you to get comfortable. As you settle, you scooch as close as you can towards Mingi’s broad chest. Your side presses into his as you rest your weight against him and Mingi smiles, still looking at the sea. He easily accommodates your weight and wraps an arm around your shoulder, covering both your forms with his blanket. You snuggle close, burying your face into his neck and continue to watch the waves crash against the shore as the moon illuminates their peaks.
You sit there for hours. Though you cannot sleep, excitement still pumping through your body, you find staying awake with Mingi is just as nice. Far more comforting, you’d even say. Mingi’s body heat keeps you pleasantly warm and his big arm stays wrapped around your waist. Soon after you settle, the guard drops his cheek onto your head and he breathes slow and deep.
Even when Yeosang relieves him of his shift, taking over his place for watch, Mingi remains still. The two of you stay there until neither of you can keep your slowly fluttering lids open any longer.
Yunho finds the two of you in the morning, and he kisses Mingi awake with a sweet grin and soft eyes. He brushes a hand through your hair and drops a kiss onto your head, eventually dropping onto your other side where he wraps an arm around both you and Mingi as the three of you watch the sunrise.
The second day, you finally find the courage to venture into the waves with San and Yunho at your sides. Yeosang stands in the waves, waiting for you.
San leads the way, walking backwards into the surf and holding both your hands. Yunho stands beside you, one of his arms reaching out to steady you and reassure you that he’s still there. You make eye contact with Yeosang and he winks at you. The honey-haired healer grew up in the sea. You know that if anything goes wrong, Yeosang will know what to do.
“Let’s go, tiny. You’ve got this,” Yunho encourages, softly nudging you forward as you apprehensively toe the water line.
You can’t swim. And you’ve never ventured into the sea before.
It’s a little daunting, but the dimples on San’s cheeks and the smile on his lips encourages you to keep walking. You clutch his hands with a vice grip and gasp as the cold, salty waves cascade over your toes.
“Sorry, lovebug. It’s a little cold.”
San laughs as you throw him a withering look. That information would have been helpful before you stepped into the sea. Yeosang laughs at your side, rubbing a hand along your waist and watching you shiver at the warmth of his touch.
No matter how many times they touch you, you cannot help the way it makes you feel.
“A little further and we can stop,” San murmurs, squeezing your hand when you stumble in the sand and pulling you closer. “C’mon, baby.”
A few steps further and you stand at Yeosang’s side, digging your toes into the plush sand beneath your feet and marveling at how the waves lap at your knees. It’s cold, but you don’t mind since it’s a reprieve from the midday sun. When you turn your back to the sea, a strong wave pushes you closer to San and he laughs when you stumble into his chest. Water splashes upwards, and you get your first taste of seawater.
“Woah!” San laughs, steadying you by the waist and watching as you stick your tongue out with an indignant sound. He can’t help the way laughter bubbles from his chest. You look positively betrayed by the ocean, as if the taste of salt on your tongue personally offends you.
Yunho and Yeosang dissolve into giggles behind San, leaning onto each other to support themselves. Your one eye narrows and you shoot them an angry look, but San thinks you look more like an angry, wet cat than anything scary. Of course, he would never tell you that.
“I’m sorry, Bug!” Yunho laughs. “You just look so funny!”
San listens to you grumble something under your breath, something that sounds like ‘showing him something funny,’ and then you bend at the waist and splash a mountain of water in his direction.
Yunho guffaws at the betrayal and San dissolves into his own laughter, bending at the waist and bracing a hand on his chest as he cackles. Your grin is positively menacing, Yeosang decides. He wonders if you’ll become as much of a brat as Wooyoung if this continues.
Yunho, now drenched in salt water and wet hair dripping into his eyes, enacts revenge and lunges towards you. San, ever the sweetheart, throws himself in between you and Yunho and the two sink into the waves with smiles.
Eventually, when your skin begins to wrinkle from the time you spend in the waves and the sun begins to set, Yeosang and you step away from the shore to settle against the same piece of driftwood that marks your temporary camp. Yeosang sits atop the log and you lay just below him on the sand. You lean against his leg, just watching the rest of the boys continue to dance and swim in the surf. The sound of their laughter makes your heart happy and their gleaming smiles leave a grin of your own on your lips.
It’s nice – smiling again, you mean. It’s a gift from Ateez they have not realized they’ve given, but you take care to treasure it regardless.
You wrap an arm around Yeosang’s tattooed calf, your fingers occasionally dragging along the pattern of thorns that descend from his thigh. They wind around his leg, ending at the bone of his ankle and you’ve seldom been able to keep your hands away from the obsidian ink since he showed you. This, of course, is much to Yeosang’s delight, and the honey-haired healer can barely resist the way he beams so brightly when your delicate hands skim across his tattoos again. He loves it when you touch him.
Mingi and Seonghwa leave the shoreline after a few minutes. They step away from the water to stoke the bonfire at the center of your makeshift camp. The flickering amber hues dance along burning bark and release a pleasant aroma onto the beach. You inhale deeply and lean further into Yeosang, humming happily when one of his hands reaches out to scratch along your scalp.
Head scratches have become one of your weaknesses, you suppose. All it takes is for one of them to run their nails along your head and you’ll sink into their embrace with a happy sigh and mushy bones.
When Mingi is satisfied with the roar of the campfire, he and Seonghwa press kisses to Yeosang’s hair and brush fingers over your hairline as they pace back towards the shore.
A harmonious shout of glee leaves San’s lips as Jongho tackles him into the shallow surf, and there’s an uproar of laughter from amongst the boys. San shouts something along the lines of being cold and twists in the waves in an attempt to pin Jongho beneath him. Jongho, easily the strongest of the nine of you, maintains his place above San but spits salt water out of his mouth in surprise when his partner douses him with a splash. In revenge, Jongho prepares to dunk San’s head beneath the water, only to be tackled into the sea by Yunho. The youngest lets out a squawk of surprise as he sinks into the water and the laughter begins again.
You turn your head towards Yeosang, resting your cheek against his knee and looking up at him with your one eye. You nudge him gently with your knuckles, drawing his attention to you.
“Are you going to join them?”
The honey-haired healer barely catches your question over the cacophony in the surf, but he smiles at the sound of your voice. He slides a hand deeper into your hair and scratches against the nape of your neck, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth when your eye flutters shut briefly.
His eyes, chocolate brown and gleaming with the flicker of flames before you, are warm and strong. They look down at you like you’re the only thing he sees – the only thing he wants to see.
It’s familiar. This moment is too.
Shivering gently from the weight of his gaze and bones feeling mushy and warm, you look up at Yeosang and wait patiently for his answer.
“No, not yet,” he whispers in return, expression soft and eyes tender. “I’m very happy where I am right now.”
You inhale deeply through your nose, recalling when he spoke the same words so long ago. The exhale that shudders through your lungs is accompanied by the sound of Yeosang’s deep, honey-sweet voice.
“I‘m happy here with you.”
He finally has the courage to say it.
You look away from Yeosang so he doesn’t see the water welling in your lone eye. The stroke of thanks you brush across his skin is enough to let him know what you mean. The swell of electricity zinging beneath your skin leaves you breathless and you lean into Yeosang’s legs to combat the shift in emotion.
The healer hums sweetly in response, unable to look away from you. He examines you as you watch his partners, lifting his head when another uproar of laughter erupts when Hongjoong overpowers Wooyoung in whatever game they’re playing in the waves.
But when you glance back at Yeosang shyly, you see it.
You see the way he looks at you now.
With stars in his gaze and affection glimmering in the shine of his irises, you see the way Yeosang’s features melt so sweetly as he watches you. He looks at you the way he looks at them; like he’s staring at his very heart and soul – like there’s nothing else in the world he’d rather gaze upon than your face warmed by the flicker of roaring flames and your one eye finally staring back into his. No apprehension, this time. No fear or confusion or worry or an amalgamation of all of them together. You just… look back at him.
Just like how he looks at you.
When Seonghwa and Mingi rejoin the parade, kicking up salt water and spinning through the shallows, the boys cheer gleefully and begin to dance. It’s chaotic and a mess of stumbling and laughter, but it’s dancing nonetheless. The sound of their joy is infectious and spreads along the beach until it reaches you and Yeosang.
But he’s not listening to them. He’s listening to you. His ears are trained on the sound that erupts from his feet, bubbling from your lips in a noise he’s been praying to hear.
Laughter.
You’re laughing.
There’s this bright, heart-stopping smile spread across your lips as you look up at Yeosang and listen to your family dance on the beach. Your shoulders shake softly with the movement of your laughter, and Yeosang can feel the vibrations of your chest pressed against his leg. It starts as a muffled giggle, barely concealed by your smile, but it deepens into a hearty laugh from deep in your belly.
He cannot tear his eyes from you.
You laugh.
You laugh and you look up at him with stars in your eyes and his heart in your hands, and it takes every fiber of his strength not to lean forward and drown himself in the taste of your lips. It’s all he wants – all he needs, he swears it. One taste of your lips would sate him for life, even though he knows he’d never be able to tear himself away again.
When you lean upwards, grabbing ahold of his fingers and pulling them towards you, Yeosang’s mouth parts to suck in a breath.
You kiss his fingers.
By the Gods, maybe that was a lie. One kiss would never be enough to sate him – there would never be enough of your touch or your kisses that could ever appease his soul. Even if he were immortal and your paths intertwined until the last of the stars burned from the sky, not even then would he have enough of you.
You laugh again, grinning up at Yeosang with a toothy smile and the corner of your mouth digging into your mask. If he wasn’t already sitting, he swears he would drop to his knees at your side.
He loves it – the sounds of your laughter. No matter how raw or croaked the sound is, he adores it. The sound of your voice once made his heart race with glee, but this… This is different.
It’s so much more.
This is joy. Unbridled and unashamed and so clearly you. It’s your laughter, your glee, your happiness that sinks beneath his sin and lights his nerves on fire. It’s your smile and your giggles that make his heart swell. Yeosang adores it. He adores you.
He cannot help the way he slides off the driftwood log and into the sand at your side. Yeosang is pulling you into his chest before you can question his actions. He wraps an arm around your shoulders and pulls your head into his neck, pressing you as tight to his chest as he possibly can.
“You’re laughing…” he whispers as he huffs in disbelief. “Bug! You’re laughing!”
The second time Yeosang utters the phrase, it’s shouted cheerfully as he squeezes you tight into his chest. His heart thumps brazenly beneath his ribs, and he can feel the pulse of yours against his own. You giggle again, wiggling to readjust yourself as you sink into the honey of his embrace. Yeosang’s heart trills excitedly again.
Yunho’s head darts upwards from the beach, startled by Yeosang’s call.
“What?”
San hears Yunho’s whispered disbelief and stands from the surf, attention drawn over towards you and Yeosang. “What did he just say?”
“It’s Bug,” Hongjoong answers, standing behind Yunho with his eyes blown wide. His heart stutters once in his chest as he takes in the sight of your shoulders shaking gently with your giggles. He can’t hear the sound of them, but Gods does he wish he could. “Bug’s laughing.”
“Holy shit…”
Yunho takes off from the beach without another word. He doesn’t even hear who curses.
Sand kicks up from his feet as he sprints towards you and Yeosang with his heart in his throat and a watery grin on his lips. He doesn’t even need to turn around to know that San is the one on his heels. Yunho knows the sound of San’s muffled sobs just as well as he knows the beat of his heart. Wooyoung is not far behind, a bubble of laughter leaving his lips and a chain missing from his wrist. Nothing binds him to that place anymore. You set him free.
Hongjoong and Mingi chase after the others, and the Captain manages to get some revenge for the day before as he shoves his guard into the surf on the way. Hongjoong’s mirthful chuckles as Mingi shouts are heard when Jongho pulls Seonghwa behind him, urging the archer to move faster.
“Bug!”
Your head pulls from Yeosang’s neck, that toothy grin still on your face just as Yunho collides with you and the honey-haired healer. The two of you sway as Yunho’s weight sinks into your figures, but Yeosang sets an arm down into the sand to support you. The black and white strands of San and Wooyoung’s hair drip with salt water as they throw themselves onto Yunho’s lap with a shout. Mingi follows just after, likely having passed Hongjoong on the beach with the length of his strides. He shakes his wet hair as he clings onto Yunho’s back and Wooyoung complains despite the fact that he’s already soaking wet. The giggly sound of Mingi’s laughter makes you chuckle again.
You laugh, as if it’s as easy as breathing.
Yeosang watches, his eyes welling with happy tears as he continues to cling onto you with one hand. He watches you giggle and the others pile into your space and listens to his new favorite sound.
Gods, he adores you. He adores them – this family.
Yunho is crying, his lip wobbling as he buries his head into your hair. He’s at your back, chest shaking with the sound of his watery sobs.
“Tiny…” he cries, but it’s a happy weep. You reach around to cling onto one of his hands. Yunho squeezes you tight, stealing the air right from your lungs, but you don’t need it. You would happily breathe in the pure euphoria of this moment instead. “Tiny, you’re laughing.”
San buries his wet hair into your lap with a joyful sound and the giggles commence again. The healer’s heart throbs so strongly but so pleasantly he thinks it will burst. You have a laugh that makes others laugh with you. Just like Wooyoung, he realizes.
Your other hand drops from Yeosang’s back to brush through San’s hair once and the healer looks up at you with glimmering half-moon eyes and a dimple poking out of his cheek. You allow your finger to poke the sweet little spot this time. His cheek muscles ache from how big his smile is. San nuzzles closer to your stomach and you let yourself shiver pleasantly, far too happy to deny yourself the joy of this moment.
You’re pretty, San thinks to himself. So pretty. Especially when you laugh.
Wooyoung melts into Hongjoong’s side and the Captain wraps an arm around his shoulder. They stand just behind Yunho, burying their happy tears into each other as Seonghwa pulls them close. Mingi and Jongho sink into the sand behind Yunho and pull each other tight. The taller guard squeezes his eyes shut and presses his lips into Jongho’s forehead, desperately hoping all his adoration is conveyed through the kiss. Jongho reaches out to squeeze Yunho’s shoulder and rests his weight against his elder’s back.
“I know,” you finally whisper into the space that separates you and Yunho. “I’m happy.”
One hand lifts to pull the mask away from your face. Without a moment’s hesitation, your nimble fingers detangle the knot from behind you, and you drop the obsidian mask into the sand. A hand wraps around your fingers when you finally let it go. Someone draws a line along the length of your left ring finger and twines their fingers with your own. They squeeze three times.
You repeat the gesture, tracing a finger down the fourth finger on their left hand, right over the thin, dark band you know is tattooed there. You squeeze their hand three times. This sign needs no translation.
You open both eyes.
“I’m so happy.”
bonus:
stranger: so who would you choose; ateez or–
reader: ateez.
stranger: you didn't even let me finish, ateez or–
reader, not missing a beat: ateez. I choose ateez.
a/n: This currently takes place sometime after the main storyline (probably xD) so it accounts for the boys knowing parts of Bug’s past (not revealed but it’s mentioned they know). For now, I won't consider these oneshots canon simply because I won’t know where it fits in the timeline HAHA xD this is essentially just a little bit of fluffy comfort for those who have been missing Bug and the boys! I’m catching up on their story but I hope you enjoy this filler for now <33 ALSO disclaimer, don’t pick stuff out of tide pools! my marine biologist family is screaming at me for including that xD just leave the creatures alone in their habitats!
sorry if bug seems a little ooc here! Loren and I have decided that bug goes from black cat energy to golden retriever after enough time with atz :’))) This is supposed to take place sometime in the future where she’s healed a little more and is a little more curious and open. There are a lot of references to things that have yet to happen in ltm so this is kind of a teaser for those xD
also shoutout to the loml @eightmakesonebraincell for the majority of the ideas in this :D she's a real one xD
taglist: *If you don't see your name on this taglist, you may have been removed if your tag doesn't work :( let me know if you don't see your name and I'll try to see what we can do to fix it :D
@verseoks @smallfrye @istgcyj @rensunjun @flowrsforfun @justchaoticwhispers @gayliljoong @http-lovelyknow @kpopnightingale @rielleluvs @queentiti72 @paralumanniluna @chittaphonstar @dear-dreamie @bangtanxberm @havetaeminforbreakfast @knucklesdeepmingi @pingyu-in-wonderland @5sos-wdw @atzcoke @ddeonghwva @sophxom @khjcoo @sunukissed @becauseiloveyunho @atinymonbebestay @goldenstarmermaid @simplyaghostsworld @multifandomizer @yeosangs-left-ass-cheek @revehosh @mysticfire0435 @side-angel @taestrwbrry @billboard-singer @jenseok17 @parkthothwa8 @jcngh0-hq @dream-in-progress @dees-writing-corner @frankenstein852 @darkdayelixer @ateezkeepmysoul @maruskz @ahhhhhhhhhghh @honeyhotteoks @simeonswhore @jxxngieteez
#ateez x reader#like the moon#poly!ateez x reader#poly ateez#ot8 x reader#ateez au#ateez x oc#poly ateez x reader#ateez angst#ateez fluff#ateez x female reader#kim hongjoong x reader#park seonghwa x reader#yunho x reader#kang yeosang x reader#mingi x reader#choi san x reader#wooyoung x reader#jongho x reader#ot8 ateez x reader#ateez scenarios#ateez imagine#ateez fanfic#woosan x reader
682 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
allstarstew
The magnificent reason is YOU
cruzadodraws
Cruzado's Scribbles
siriuslyarrogant
Battered Plums
bootslave
Under the Boot
chicalesbiana9
Chica Lesbiana