#and the story of us. and back to december. and mine UGH | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

scheodingers-muppet · 10 months

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in honor of speak now tv about to drop, im bringing back my stranger things taylor song casting. i wrote a lot of this on my phone after listening to the album so apologizes for grammar errors or anything

mine: ronance, from Nancy's POV. Careless man's careful daughter. Sitting there by the water mirroring the boat scene. You learn my secrets and you figure out why I'm guarded. In the music video, we see the couple fighting when things get tough outside of the relationship, which we've also seen Nancy do, both when she was struggling with Barb and fighting with Jonathan when dealing with sexism from her job.

sparks fly: lumax. Max is the rainstorm, Lucas the house of cards. "I'm on my guard for the rest of the world, but for you, I know it's no good"

back to december: stancy; but just Nancy apologizing for how things ended, not them getting back together. "that night" not just being the Halloween fight but her cheating on him. I think she would feel bad about how things ended and I really want them to talk everything out in season 5. Plz. Also the line, "I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile...how you held me in your arms that September night, the first time you ever saw me cry" Obv with the tan skin and smile, but I hc that after Nancy told Steve what happened to Barb, he held her while she cried

speak now: byler, from Will's pov. Not in a literal wedding sense (though that might make a fun fic...) but more of Mike asking Will for advice about El and Will just finally coming clean. Maybe it doesn't go great and he doubles down with El and it causes some tension or maybe the roles are reversed and Mike comes clean then panics and doubles down and Will is trying to get him back

dear john: Joyce about Lonnie. I hate this man.

mean: El about Angela. Imagine if before the roller skate incident, she confided in Joyce and she told her to just confront her with her words, ya know? Like just call her out for being mean. Then when that doesn't work, she thinks, "well, what would Hopper tell me? Gotta fight back." Makes my heart melt

the story of us: Mike and El, from El’s pov. I just really feel like El would use story tails and romance stories, etc. to compare love to. This song to the letter fight just... ugh.

never grow up: Nancy. First verse to Holly, how she knows what's ahead, both in terms of alternate dimensions and being a teenage girl. She doesn't want her to have to deal with either of the two, just to stay little while she can. Second verse to Mike, seeing him start to become more of an adult and secretly missing her annoying kid brother. (brings more punch to the line “all your little brothers favorite songs”) Third verse takes place after she graduates, moving for school. Her night light mentioned in the verse was her graduation/farewell present from Holly, who says she's a big girl now and doesn't need it.

enchanted: elmax! From Max's POV. Imagine the second verse is them having a sleepover, playing truth or dare. I also love the use of referencing the story tail love metaphor again

better than revenge: stommy; Tommy singing about Nancy. idk it’s the closest I could get.

innocent: Steve and Nancy. First verse is about Nancy (lost your balance on a tight rope, lost your mind trying to get it back. wasn’t it beautiful when you believed in everything and everyone believed in you. , second about Steve. bonus points if you imagine them singing this to each other (not in a romantic way)

haunted: lumax (I’m sorry) Lucas begging for her to come back after her attack. Trying to move on and be happy but he can’t get over her. the chorus too, “somethings gone terribly wrong” “your eye’s gone cold” the bridge too “you’re not gone, you can’t be gone” you can also imagine it as like, she lives but can’t face the party without thinking about what happened too

last kiss: stancy / mike and el (parallel!) I think I’m gonna write up a post about all the parallels I see in the characters and dynamics, but I really love this one. Steve being El and Nancy being Mike. The Wheelers having severe issues with love (specifically saying the word) and hurting those who are head over heel for them. I see this from all of their perspectives, switching based off the lines. first verse is mileven (the plane line, “sit on the floor wearing your clothes” we’ve seen El wear clothes from pretty much everyone in the party) the second verse is stancy from Nancy’s pov (life of the party, “i’m not much for dancing, but for you i did” listing things he did she loved without saying “i love you”) bridge is rapid fire switching. “so I’ll watch your life in pictures like i used to watch you sleep” mike (bylers take a lot of family photos; i can imagine him seeing her in photos will sends) “i feel you forget me like i used to feel you breathe” steve “and i’ll keep up with our old friends just you ask them how you are” el “i hope it’s nice where you are…it’s a beautiful day” nancy (i think she feels bad for how things ended)

long live: the whole party. they deserve to feel like hero’s and royalty after everything they’ve been though. i desperately need to find an edit to this

ours: Steddie. the town hates eddie atm and would probably not take well to king steve dating him. the lines “i love the riddles that you speak” and “any snide remarks from my father about your tattoos will be ignored” i can also see lumax, but this is just such a light hearted song to me so i didn’t want to compare it to the racism we’ve seen be thrown at lucas and his relationship

superman: jopper. i love the idea of joyce hyping him up as her superman. also based on my parents (my dad was a first responder and this song always made me think of them for the “saving the world” aspect) “he’s not all bad like his reputation” i’m ignoring the sad parts and just focusing on the “go be a superhero, i’ll be here when you get back”

electric touch: steddie. eddie’s taylor, steve is patrick. “this could either break my heart or bring it back to life” “got a history of stories ending sadly” (eddie) “everytime i tried for love, it fell apart” (steve)

when emma falls in love: robin. i have no real proof, it just reminds me of her. i love the image of steve saying all of this about her ❤️❤️ (obvs pronouns change and stuff)

i can see you: steddie (it’s a very steddie coded album, leave me alone) from steve’s pov, talking about how he’s always had a crush on eddie and always noticed him but it breaks eddie’s brain fhat king steve has a crush on him

castles crumbling: steve angst time. talking about his “fall from social grace” and how he lost everything, both in terms of reconciling what he lost from being a jerk as king steve and what he lost when he was dethroned

foolish one; byler. “stop checking your mailbox for confessions of love” “it’s delicate but i’ll try my best to seem bulletproof” “maybe someday when we’re older this is something we’ll laugh about” “you haven’t written me or called” “i’ll get your longing glances but she’ll get your ring”

timeless; jopper. soul mates for real

#stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #chief hopper #mike wheeler #steddie #ronance #taylor swift #speak now #speak now tv

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ellies-space · 10 months

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Speak Now Taylor's Version thoughts

Y'all knew this was coming, T Swift's music is like my #1 special interest. Because I just can't help myself, I've written a mini-review of each track. Spoiler alert: I think this might be my favourite re-record so far (although maybe that's just because Speak Now has a really special place in my heart).

Let's dive in...

THE OG ALBUM

Mine: Omg. THE NOSTALGIA. This one sounds fantastic - very similar vocals (with a slight country twang attempted!!!) with much richer instrumentals. You can really hear the details in the guitar elements!

Sparks Fly: The production is a little different - softer guitars, more pronounced strings - but I kinda dig it? I always thought the original production was a little bit too “loud”/harsh so this is an improvement for me. Her voice is also a little softer/less… squeaky? Which I like.

Back to December: Also very very similar production and vocally. Vocals are a little more breathy in places? And certain subtle parts of the production are now more pronounced which is cool - bells ringing, elements of the strings.

Speak Now: This is probably the song where the vocal tone is the most similar to the original (so far) - she’s captured that more cutesy, “young” vibe. The production is also so, SO similar - practically identical, which is impressive!

Dear John: My favourite remains my favourite. It seems more sad than angry now, which is somehow even more devastating :(

Mean: Still delightful. Still the song that got me through my teenage years. Somehow hits different now Taylor IS big enough that nobody can hit her!!

The Story of Us: Oooooh the production feels more rock-y this time around which I love! This should have been the pop punk masterpiece of Taylor’s career tbh. Also just remembering how iconic the music video was???

Never Grow Up: I still can’t listen to this song without crying. So there’s that. Beautiful though. And hearing 30s Taylor singing “I don’t wanna grow up”… ooooft.

Enchanted: Literally got full body goosebumps when this one kicked in holy SHIT. Somehow the production sounds EVEN more dreamy. This is one song where I would’ve preferred Taylor’s harsher, more desperate old vocals though - the softer ones here are nice, but don’t quite capture the same “AAAAAAAA I am desperately crushing” vibe.

Better Than Revenge: Unpopular opinion but I actually like the lyric change. Less slut-shamey and it fits well! Also, the rerecorded ad-lib bits? ICONIC. The production feels even more heavy rock this time too. Ugh I love this so much, the feminism is still leaving my body a little but a little less now at least

Innocent: God this hits SO DIFFERENT now that Taylor is older than Kanye was when The Incident happened. It almost feels like she could be singing about herself now??? Or like it’s just a general song about redemption… I somehow prefer this to the original. The new drums are so deep and bassy too!!

Haunted: This is another one where the production feels even more heavily rock-influenced and I am HERE. FOR. IT. And the vocals sound just as emotional in this one compared to, say, Dear John where they’re more muted in places.

Last Kiss: The production sounds different somehow but I can’t quite put my finger on how?? I think it’s the guitars. Anyway, it’s equally as dreamy and sad so I’m fine with it. Also I bet this one is difficult for Taylor post-Joe-breakup :(

Long Live: Oh god I shed a tear. She sounds phenomenal, the production is phenomenal, and now, her old band probably DO have children and they DID say goodbye (at least some of them) and UGHGHGHHGH emotions.

Ours: I like this one, and the production is still cute; I just think that with this song being SO cutesy, it worked better with Taylor’s younger voice. I mean, I’ll still listen to it, and it’s fine, but… Yeah. Sounds weird with a more “mature” tone.

Superman: I never liked this song tbh, it’s just a bit “meh”… But I can at least appreciate that this is an excellent rerecord. Great production, the vocals are really strong, she’s captured that more youthful/dreamy tone in this one. I mean, I’ll probably never listen to it again, but I never listened to OG Superman so…

THE VAULT

Electric Touch: First, Taylor Swift + Fall Out Boy on one song is my teenage dream come true. Second, it feels like a more anxious sister to Sparks Fly - more vulnerable and worried about that first meeting and whether those sparks will translate into something real. I love how Patrick and Taylor’s voices sound together! Pop punk perfection.

When Emma Falls In Love: The most important thing: WHO IS EMMA???? Anyway. Beautiful piano. It’s got that mid-to-late-2000s pop feel, influenced by country a little.

I Can See You: Um. Horny jail for Ms. Swift??? Very forbidden romance vibes. The sound is something totally different from any other Taylor Swift song (which at this point is impressive) - very 1970s mixed with 2000s indie. Unexpected but addictive.

Castles Crumbling: Oh, this is so sad, because it’s essentially 2010 Taylor predicting what would happen in 2016… It genuinely feels like her biggest fears all came true… Musically I love it, very ethereal and dramatic. Hayley and Taylor sound amazing together.

Foolish One: First of all, I wish this had been on OG Speak Now because past me really needed to hear the lessons of this one 💀 ANYWAY. A nice gentle pop song, I’m a fan.

Timeless: What a perfect way to end the album: with another wistful tune about the kind of true love that Taylor was looking for at this point in her life. It’s a more reflective and mature version of Mine in many ways. And that country-influenced storytelling… The guitars… It’s just *chef’s kiss* all over. I hope Taylor finds this love one day.

#personal #Taylor swift #speak now #speak now Taylor's version #sntv #speak now stan #I'm so happy

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now-that-i-saw-you · 10 months

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First thoughts on Speak Now (Taylor's Version)

Mine

That first "uh uh uh" 🥺 this song sounds so good; like the 2010 one but so much better.

Sparke Fly

I love that she used a video from tour for the lyric video. 2011 Taylor with her 2023 vocals, quite literally. One of my favourite thing about the rerecordings is how the instrumentals sound a lot clearer. The way she sings "I know it's no good" oh god.

Back To December

I really love the lyric videos. "Then I think about summer all times I watched you laughing from the passanger side" so exceptionally good ugh HER VOCALS.

Speak Now

Underrated bop tbh. The "don't you"!!!

Dear John

Wanted to kms from that first guitar strings. I love that the lyric video is a letter. Idk if I'm imagining but her voice sounds more...haunted (no pun intended) in this version. Of course the high note sounds even better.

Mean

Country bop!!! Another wonderful thing about the rerecording is how better Taylor's gotten at enunciating. She made it to the big old city 🥺.

The Story of Us

A pop punk bop!!! The fact the lyric video's a book wkfkwkf I'm obsessed with the little illustrations!! Again, like the 2010 version but better. NEXT CHAPTER

Never Grow Up

I wasn't emotionally prepared for the way she sings "oh darling" in this. Will I ever be able to listen to this without crying?

Enchanted

A lyrical masterpiece with improved vocals!! This song literally defined my teen years and now I got to listen to it for the first time again. She truly sings "I'm wonderstruck dancing around all along" like a lovestruck teenager. I'm obsessed with the post-bridge breakdown. It sounds like it's literally her thoughts echoing. Using photos from the Speak Now Tour and then changing it up to Eras Tour pictures was soooo mean.

Better Than Revenge

32 years old Taylor telling me to go stand in the corner YESSSSSSS. I love her voice on the opening message. AKFKWKKF HER VOICE IN THE BACKGROUND VOCALS. I don't care about the lyric change! Y'all should move on because there's nothing to do about it. Idk why focus on that one lyric when the best one in the song is the entire second verse like, a lyric genius.

Innocent

Oh god her voice. Can we now admit it's one of her best songs? I hope she rerecorded the song knowing it's okay to still be growing up. That goddamn high note.

Haunted

The fact she sounds actually haunted in this version. VOCALS!!! That squeak on the last "I thought I had you figured out" ...lives were changed.

Last Kiss

Can't believe she somehow made this song even sadder and we just let her. You know when Taylor puts a watch in her lyric video it's gonna be the best song you've ever heard. The "mmmm" before the bridge. SO I'LL WATCH YOUR LIFE IN PICTURES LIKE I USED TO WATCH YOU SLEEP

Long Live

I love that she uses videos from the Speak Now Tour!! Another song that always makes me cry with updated vocals. Her arm lyric reads "She's out there on her own and she's alright." I'M GOING TO SOB

Ours

This used to be my favourite song when I was a kid 🥲. Listening to it again healed something in me tbh. 13 years later and they really couldn't take what's ours.

Superman

This song's my little baby y'all stay away from it. Something in his deep brown eyes has me saying HE'S NOT ALL BAD LIKE HIS REPUTATION. The bridge was always so good and so underrated.

Vault tracks!!

Electric Touch (feat. Fall Out Boy)

I was so hyped for this one. The most important collab she's ever made. I LOVE the production. First date song!! This is like Fearless' older sister. I missed her crush songs kdkfke. Obsessed with her telling the time.

When Emma Falls In Love

Oh a piano song?? This is such a classic Baby Taylor song. "I've got my money on things going badly" -> "when Emma falls in love she calls her mom, jokes about the ways this one could go wrong" "and all the bad boys would be good boys if they only had a chance to love her" -> "I can make the bad guys for the weekend"

I Can See You

I did not expect this. "I can see you up against the wall with me" excuse me??? This song's a reminder Taylor has always been That Girl.

Castles Crumbling (feat. Hayley Williams)

The lyric video's giving "I'd meet you where the spirit meets the bone" literally Nothing New's little sister oh my god what the fuck. This song is a lot quieter and sadder than I expected. Hayley's vocals ekdkekfke GOD. I love it when Taylor uses kingdom metaphors in her songs.

Foolish One

Her voice!!! "You are not the exception" -> "you are the only exception" she will not be the one he loves :// IT'S DELICATE. And "my cards are on the table, yours are in your hand" because she was being honest about her intentions while he was unclear and confusing.

Timeless

Taylor really loves writing songs about her grandparents. What a way to end this album. "Even in a different life you would've been mine"

#taylor swift #speak now (taylor’s version)

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sunnyshiftyy · 2 years

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Date - TE one shot

Book: The Elementalists (Book 1) (takes place before the pairing's together)

Pairing: Beckett Harrington x f!MC Elise Russel (not together yet but ~tension~)

Words: 3479

Rating: General

Summary: Shreya convinces Elise to go on a date with a random guy, and oopsies she spills the tea to Zeph and Beckett when Elise walks in on their study session in their common room.

TW: Probably cursing

A/N: Since this is my first piece of fanfic writing, i should clarify some points. 1) You may have noticed the f!MC is named Elise. It is because of TE, where i chose to name the MC Elise, that i use that nickname in my social media profiles. So, don't get it twisted. 2) I've decided to write this in third person and present tense for now. 3) I've built this world in my head in excruciating detail, so a lot of the side characters are my characters. In this piece in particular, Nathan. If you want to know more about my OC’s in my TE universe, click here. The main characters are not mine and belong to Pixelberry. 4) " are used for things that are said out loud, ' are used for specific thoughts. 5) English is not my first language, excuse the spelling and grammar mistakes! 6) My masterlist will be up soon, and will be linked in my bio and here (My Masterlist)

A/N 2: December 26th, 2022: Edit spelling and grammar.

Tags: @theclassycandy

Let me know if you want to be tagged in future fanfics or TE content!

And on that note, i hope you enjoy!

Elise hears voices getting louder as she approaches her common room door. Well, not voices. A voice.

"Three, Zeph, it says three!" The sassy tone tells her this probably isn't the first time she explained it in the past hour. As she steps through the door, Shreya immediately snaps her head up from Zeph’s worksheet and starts grinning widely.

"Oh my Gods, she's back! How did it go on your date?!"

Elise’s face instantly scrunches up. The others don't know about this. Or at least, they didn't. She can't blame Shreya for blurting it out like this, since she never explicitly told her it was a secret. But, you know, you would expect your best friend to read your mind, so.. With Shreya’s words the guys’ interests are piqued, and Zeph and Beckett look up from their books. Zeph quickly chimes in,

"Wait, you went on a date?" Fantastic. Why doesn't he scream it even louder? In the hallway maybe?

"Ugh, Shrey..."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry.. Now spill!" She sits up excitedly, with that sparkle in her eyes she only has when she hears new gossip or sees pictures of cute cats. Either or. Elise's gears turn as she tries to think of any possible way out of this, but does it even matter now? She defeatedly walks up to the sofa and swings one leg on the backrest.

"It went good.. I guess," she sighs while untying her shoelaces.

"How good? Like, you like him good or..." Shrey’s hands make the 'Tell me more of the story, I need my drama fix'-motion. You would almost think she only set her best friend up on this date to talk about it after. It was probably at least half of the reason.

"He's cool. And nice. Too nice actually. He didn't let me pay my part of the bill."

"Who asked who?" Zeph asks. Elise presses her lips together and looks at him pleadingly. Oh my Gods, why is this so important? Shreya replies,

"He asked her."

"Well then he should pay." Her brown haired head bops back and forth between the two of them.

"That's what I'm saying!"

"Whatever, it was okay. And he's also not bad looking so... Yeah," Elise interjects, hoping to end this convo here. And for a small moment, no one says a thing. Okay, so that wor-

"Did you kiss him?" Shreya asks excitedly.

"What? No!" She takes a step forward, but then immediately composes herself again. For a second, there's a hint of a confused look on her face, that the others don't notice. She's taken aback by her own voice, as it came out loud and defensive.

"Aww, boo! You should've. He's hot."

"It's the first date!" Elise exclaims. Shrey dramatically rolls her eyes.

"Oh, screw the games and just go with the flow!"

"I don't play 'games', Shrey, I just didn't want to kiss him yet, jeez." Shreya sighs and calms down slightly.

"I'm sorry, I went a bit overboard with that.. I just want you to be happy and have fun."

"I know. And I appreciate that you care about me," she tries not to sigh. Elise takes a quick look at the coffee table. It's full of books, stationary and even Shreya's cauldron. The books are mostly Beckett's, since Shrey and Zeph each only have one book in front of them. She peers over Zeph's shoulder. The first sentence she can read out of his heavily used copy tells her exactly what they're doing.

"Studying potions i see?"

"Have been for the past two hours, but you're welcome to join!" he says, grinning. Shreya smiles in agreement, but Beckett has long put his head back down and is studying again. An awkward silence passes through the room, but only Elise seems to notice it.

"O..kay, I’m just going to change and get out my stuff then," she says, as she heads towards her bedroom. She opens up her closet door and stares right back at herself in the mirror she put in a few weeks ago. Her face is flushed, but her hair still looks as pristine as a few hours ago, when Shreya put it in bubble braids, with little gold rubber bands. Elise huffs. This is so stupid. Why did she even go on this date in the first place? She takes a deep breath, calming herself down, and grabs some leggings and a sweater out of the drawers. As she changes, she can't help but feel something gnawing at her. And she knows what it is, but she pretends she doesn't. It's easier like that.

Elise walks back into the room and sits down next to Beckett. She studies his face for a second, but quickly looks back down to open up her book. She doesn't know what she would have expected. A look? Any sort of movement? Making space for her stuff? But he just sits there, still, concentrated.

"I don't get this sentence, does anyone know what the hell it means?" Elise asks, trying to ease the tension. She makes a point to look at everyone. Shreya and Zeph lift up their head and Elise spins her book around so they can read. Shreya's eyes narrow to read the tiny font.

"No idea.." she says. Zeph searches frantically through the pages of his book.

"I think it means the grass needs to be dried for 4 days.. upside down?" His uncertain tone is directed towards Beckett, who's still conveniently really focused on this -in Elises opinion- very unclear and useless chapter. Only when they all look at him, he looks up at Zeph.

"Yeah," he says, slightly annoyed. And as quickly as he responded his head is back down again.

"Well, that mystery is solved!" Zeph smiles enthusiastically, still oblivious to the weird vibe in the room. Maybe Elise's the only one thinking this is awkward? She responds,

"Sure.. thanks. Oh and also, um, does this mean red or orange cause it never sa-" Suddenly, there's a harsh sigh coming from the left of the coffee table.

"I will need to take my leave, thanks for having me, Shreya. Zeph," Beckett states, as he looks around the table, his gaze pausing as it falls on Elise’s face. He hesitates.

"...Elise.." He swiftly breaks eye contact, packs up his many books and speed walks out of the door. The three of them are still staring at the dark oak-wooden door in an unsettling moment of silence as it falls closed.

"That was weird," Shreya comments, strangely unbothered. Zeph quirks an eyebrow at her.

"Even for Beckett," she clarifies. Elise feels the little gnawing thing in the pit of her stomach getting bigger.

"I think it’s my fault? I don't know, he just seemed so.. mad? At me?" she gets out. Shreya shakes her head.

"You didn't do anything, hun, you weren't even here for most of the time." Elise nods and looks back at her work. This study session probably isn't going to be as productive as she originally thought.

"Maybe he's mad cause his favourite study buddy wasn't here?" Zeph laughs.

"Hey, I showed up!" Elise defends herself. Not that it really matters. It's not like they invited her or even let her know this was happening. Why is she even stressing over this? Shreya waves his comment away.

"Nonsense, maybe he just had a bad day."

"Maybe..." Elise mumbles. She tries to refocus on the letters in front of her, pushing the excessive thoughts out of her head. She'll talk to him later.

Thirty minutes later, Zeph thuds his book closed. "I'm done with this for today," he sighs, crossing his arms in front of him and defeatedly laying down his head. Potions is a notoriously hard part of Natural Studies, and especially at Penderghast. Zeph doesn't get how some people just get this stuff by reading it once, and even get A's on the practical. He has been doing better as of lately, mainly because of the help of Shreya and Beckett, who somehow are really good at potions. He's not at all surprised Beckett's good at it, but he should've known that running an actual business based on potion making makes one quite an expert. Shreya lays a hand on his arm.

"It's okay, you worked pretty damn hard today," she comforts him. An idea strikes her. She tries to not let her face betray her as a mischievous grin crosses her expression for just a second.

"Aahh!" Zeph shouts, and he bounds up like lightning. Elise startles with the sudden yelp. "Shrey! Don't do that!" He rubs over his left wrist with a pout on his face. Shreya laughs.

"It looked like you could use some energy..," she says smugly, "And I delivered." She holds her hand up and lets little bright lines spark between her fingers. She looks at Elise, wiggling her eyebrows.

"As long as you don't do that to me," Elise laughs, packing up her stuff.

"Can't promise that. If you ever fall asleep in my lesson.."

"If you show up as TA in my next metal spell class I am leaving the room!" Zeph exclaims.

"Oh, shut it, you big baby, it wasn't that bad. And I'm never going to be a TA, no thank you. I'm drowning in responsibilities already," she almost sighs, thinking back to all the errands she still needs to run. "That reminds me, I have to go to Penn Square to get some ingredients for Serene and Sublime. Anyone want to come with me?" She says, while opening her compact mirror.

"I'll go! I deserve food after this torture called studying," Zeph says, suddenly very energetic again. He stands up just as Shreya’s eyes widen.

"Oh my Gods, I'm going to be late!" Shreya quickly snaps the ornately detailed sides together and pockets it, hurriedly sliding together all her papers. Why do stores have to close this early?

"Don't worry about it, I'll pack up your stuff. Just go get you ingredients!" Elise offers. Shreya nods thankfully. "Thanks, you're the best! Let's go, Zeph!"

"Coming! Bye Elise!" he yells as they step through the portal.

"Bye," she murmurs. She stacks the books and sheets neatly together, and stands up, walking her own things back to her room. Should she go talk to Beckett? He was acting very weird. Screw it, who is she kidding? This is also about her feelings towards this situation. She wants to talk to him, to explain it to him. She would've never gone on that date if Shreya didn't insist on it. Face downcast, she organizes her books in the spacious wooden drawers of her desk and plops down on the chair. A few seconds of silence go by. Even thoughts stay away. The soft ticking of the dark blue rimmed alarm clock makes her feel at peace. Then, she takes a deep breath and stands up. Procrastinating is only going to make it worse. She puts on her sneakers and walks out of her dorm, towards Beckett’s.

Not even 5 seconds after she knocked, the door to Beckett’s common room swings open. A blond, slender guy in the door frame looks at her in surprise.

"Yes?" His eyes look her over before the recognition flicks across them. "Oh, hey!" He holds the door handle as he leans on the other hand.

"Hi! You're Nathan, right?" Elise plasters a smile on her face. She's never seen him before, but Beckett mentioned him once. A friend from high school. With the emphasis on 'a'. They were never besties, that's for sure. Beckett also doesn’t seem one for friends. At least, if the first few months of the academic year were any indication.

"Yeah, that's me. And you're the.. girl that Beckett's always hanging around with. To which school did you go again?"

"Wait, high school? And I never really told anyo-" she says, looking at him questioningly.

"Yes," he interrupts her. 'Yikes,' Elise thinks, as she tries to hide the dislike for him she already feels crawling up her torso. Is he always like this, or..?

"Oh, West Eden high school..," she answers dutifully, taken aback and trying not to flush by his directness. Why would he possibly want to know this? He looks up and mentally lists all the names that come to mind, but quickly gives up and looks back at her.

"Weird, I’ve never heard of it…"

"How could you know all the names of all the high schools in America?" the girl laughs, trying to not come off as nervous. Suddenly, his face falls into a disapproving grimace.

"...Oh, it's.. it's a public school. Should've guessed," he almost scoffs. An awkward few silent seconds go by. Elise purses her lips and stares uncomfortably at a spot on the door frame, and a few times back at him. She hoped something like this wouldn’t happen, but deep down, she knew it would eventually have to.

"Okay, ..Well, I just had something to say to Beckett, so..," she breaks the silence. Nathan instantly turns around, slowly sauntering back to his dorm room door.

"Close the door behind you, will you?" he says, dismissively. And without a backward glance, his frame disappears behind the door. Stunned to silence, Elise glances to the other side of the common room. She’ll just go knock, right? Hesitantly, she steps through the door and closes it. As she notices the soft thudding of Unattuned music she turns her head back in the direction of Nathans’ door. As much as she hates to admit it, he has good taste. It seems so long ago that she was immersed in the Unattuned word. Oh Gods, she’s like one of them now. Her world, she corrects herself. The world she grew up in. Does she miss it? She smiles. Not really. It’s nostalgic. It was fun. Still is. But ever since she opened her eyes, soaking wet on the banks of the lake, sun blinding her, the buzzing sound of the people and the leaves of the trees moving in the wind, she felt a sense of home. Something she’s always been searching for. Clearing her head of thoughts, she knocks on Beckett’s door.

"Come in." she muffledly hears. Here she goes.. She opens the door. Beckett sits on his bed, with his back to her, leaning against the headboard. The book in his hands looks thick and old, and is definitely not part of the normal curriculum. Since he has the dorm other side, everything’s mirrored to her room, just like Shreya’s. The only difference is the sheer amount of books everywhere, his windowsill garden, how neat his room is and the fact that he sleeps to the wrong side with his head. Well, not wrong, just not how she would do it.

"Hey. It’s me," she greets him happily.

"It is," he sighs, not wanting to let his eyes leave his book. ‘Of course she needed to come here,’ he thinks. There’s a reason why he left the girls’ common room. So he wouldn’t have to deal with… this whole ordeal. Elise closes the door. This is going to be tough. How does she start this conversation without it being awkward?

"Uhm… I just wanted to ask if you’re okay."

"I’m good," he answers, still concentrating hard on his work. Or, trying to not concentrate on the fact Elise’s standing within three feet from him. Or that she’s clearly just taking pity in him. Why does she even bother?

"Oh..," she mumbles, looking at the tips of her worn down shoes. The sound of Beckett turning a page interrupts the silence.

"Was that everything?" he sighs, sounding almost annoyed, still not looking at her, avoiding eye contact at all costs.

"Well.. I don't exactly believe you," she gets out, after she mustered up the courage. Elise studies the right side of his face, trying to get a read. The only result she gets is a sigh. Growing tired of his lack of words, she initiates conversation once again.

"You were so short with me and the rest at my dorm and I just had the feeling you were kind of... Feeling off." Beckett shakes his head in frustration. When will she give up?

"Well, that feeling was wrong. I'm fine, I just have a lot of homework to get through, which would be a lot easier if you weren't here," he states, trying to not let his irritation be heard in his voice. Why does he even like this girl? Why did he have to like this exact one? Why did he have to like anyone? Elise is quiet for a second. She knows he isn’t being rude to her just because he can. It’s because he has to. The moment that thought crosses her mind, she wishes she never went on that date. Again, for that matter. Did she even want it a little bit?

"So Zeph was wrong," she casually comments. "He said you 'missed your favourite study buddy'."

"I can study fine on my own. Which is good, since I'll have to get used to it." The last sentence was said with a particular tone in his voice, which Elise can’t quite decipher. But she knows it has something to do with what happened today. He stands up, and without sparing a glance, puts his book back in it’s place on the nicely organized shelf above his desk.

"What are you talking about?" she asks, trying to get some clarification. Beckett sits down on his fancy spinning office chair, this time facing her.

"Nothing," he denies, wishing he never said anything. The thought of going back to how it was, studying alone for most of the time, is in some way both alluring and saddening. He likes her company. He likes her. Gods, why does this have to be so complicated?

When Elise doesn’t respond, he looks at her face, making eye contact for the first time she’s been here. The pulling sensation he feels in his chest causes him to look away again. He’ll just have to come to terms with the fact she’s probably not interested.

"I'm happy your date went well," he sighs, trying to not sound annoyed. Elise eyes roll at the mention of that dumb date.

"Oh please... 'well' is a little optimistic."

"Oh." Beckett attempts to not sound relieved.

"I don't know, I just.. don't like him that way. I'm not gonna go on a second date. Also no firsts anymore. At least for a while. It's so stupid." Elise babbles. She starts fiddling with one of her braids in annoyance. Beckett nods. "I wasn't even gonna go at first, but Shrey said ‘live a little’, so I did. And I found out life sucks."

"It's not because you don't date that life sucks," Beckett comments, sounding very logical.

"I know, it's a.. metaphore..," she defeatedly smiles. "Whatever, I just think dates are so mechanical. You're basically forcing yourself to like someone. I don't want to do that. I don't decide who I like. I like who I like, that's it," she blurts out. It comes out so fast she only realizes what she said a few seconds later. She feels her cheeks getting warmer. Why did she just say this?

"Yeah..," he halfsmiles, thinking back to the feelings that overtake him every time he thinks about her. The feelings he never asked for.

"I'm sorry, that was way too much, I'll be going now. Please don't tell any of this to Shreya, she's gonna flip…" Elise rattles off her sentence, pleadingly looking in his grey-brown eyes. She should’ve just bitten her tongue. Why is she like this?

"I won't," he answers. Beckett isn’t one to gossip, and especially not to Shreya. Elise jokingly calls her Shreylock, because the way she finds out gossip could get her a job as a detective. Then Shreya jokes back that that’s why her hair’s so big. ‘Because it’s full of secrets’. Beckett never understood that joke. But even he knows telling Shreya is a guaranteed way to make your secrets not so secret anymore. And why would he? What even would be interesting to Shreya about this conversation?

Elise breathes a sigh of relief and reaches for the door handle behind her back. She smiles at Beckett as she says,

"Thank the Gods for you." A little glint in her eye betrays the double meaning behind her words. A silent two seconds pass, when she laughingly shakes her head and opens the door. "Okay, thanks, bye!" she yells, as she ducks away through the door opening.

"Bye," he can’t help but smile at her quick disappearing act. The door of the common room thuds closed. After a few seconds in silence he shakes his head. Will he ever understand what goes on inside her head?

#the elementalists #te mc #theelementalists #playchoices #playchoices the elementalists #Beckett x Mc #beckett harrington #beckett harrington x mc #shreya mistry #zeph hernandez #te fanfics #the elementalists fanfic

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drvrslcense · 3 years

Text

devils roll the dice (angels roll their eyes)

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+ send your requests!

pairing: leo valdez x daughter of athena! reader

summary: you and leo are dared to skinny dip, what happens if your friends run away with your clothes?

warnings: skinny dipping (a bit of nudity), a few curses, mentions of sex (but not really?) - let me know if you see other ones!

notes: request; this takes place years after the events of hoo (toa never happened)

read this fic in ao3!

Leo Valdez is seriously annoying.

The way he smiles as if everything’s okay and his anger is not something you’re feeling like waves hitting you over and over - it’s just annoying. Why can’t he just get it over with and explode in front of you, use his fire powers and all?

With a scoff, you shook your head, averting your gaze from the curly-haired boy to the campfire in front of you.

Truthfully, this event was supposed to be just the seven - Percy, Annabeth, Jason, Piper, Frank, Hazel, and Leo. Percy invited you to enjoy this night with his friends. He found you earlier by this beach, kicking sand, and muttering how much Leo Valdez just pissed you off. And he just had the audacity to invite you to an event, saying Leo won’t be here. But here he is - grinning as he was roasting a marshmallow over the fire.

“So, Leo,” Percy turned to Leo. “Truth or dare?”

“Dare,” he grinned.

You saw Percy look at you, smiling, like a monkey who finally grabbed the banana from the tree. "Go skinny dipping with Y/N."

"What!?" I'm sorry, but were you just dragged into something that doesn't even include you? "No. I'm not skinny dipping, especially not with him."

"Wow," Leo said, standing up. "Way to hurt my feelings, Y/N."

"Like you have one," you rolled your eyes.

"So, are you doing this or not?" Leo questioned you, already raising an arm to remove his shirt.

"No, I'm not," you crossed your arms over your chest.

"Your loss," Leo shrugged, shirtless. Your eyes scanned over his body. Realizing what you were doing, you averted your gaze from him into the campfire. "Like what you were seeing?"

You can just feel him smirking across from you. "It's not even my dare, how do I lose?"

"It's a dare and you're involved so get on with it," Percy waved his hand dismissively, smiling mischievously as he took a sip of his blue coke.

"Do they really have to be naked?" Thank the Gods for your sister, Annabeth.

"Yeah," Jason echoed. "We're all going to be scarred forever when Leo goes buck naked."

"Fine," Percy sighed in defeat. "You can keep your underwear."

They all looked at Leo expectantly, who raised his hands up. "Oh no, I'm not doing it if Y/N won't."

"It's your dare, Valdez."

"Yeah, and?"

"It's not mine."

"But Percy said I have to do it with you."

"Ugh," you huffed, standing up to remove your clothing. "I hate you."

"Well, I don't exactly like you either," Leo quipped, unbuckling his pants.

You turned around, raising your arms over your head as you removed your shirt, revealing your balconette bikini top in Victorian blue. The matching bikini was a gift from Piper on your birthday last September. This is only the first time you wore this, but under a white cropped top and denim jeans, thinking you won't have to swim as it is mid-winter in New York.

Unfortunately, Percy is a pain in the ass and dared Leo to go skinny dipping with you.

Annabeth handed you a beach towel you wrapped yourself in. Despite the camp's borders protecting you from extreme weather, the air was still chilly, and it sent a shiver down your spine as it hit you.

You turned around and saw that Leo had the matching blue and floral printed towel wrapped around his waist. "Let's just get this over with."

You walked over towards the edge where the waves meet the sun, leaving Leo to catch up to you. "So, how are we doing this?"

"You just don't think," is what you answered as you threw your towel somewhere behind you, diving into the open beach and swimming as far as you can.

As soon as the cold catches up to you, you stand up; the water reaching your chin. You saw Leo standing still at the edge, looking stunned. "What are you waiting for, you elf?"

Leo only shook his head and followed you. You waited a few moments, looking around the vast ocean, with chattering teeth and ragged breaths. In mid-December, the water current felt like icicles hitting your body over and over in different places. You couldn’t wait to get back out on the shore and sit by the fire for warmth.

You feel something tug at your ankle, pulling you deeper. As you struggled to stay afloat, you kicked whatever it was, deciding ultimately more on your own survival than the welfare of some random sea creature. But it wasn't a random sea creature. Instead, it was Leo, holding a bloody nose as he surfaced beside.

"Fuck you, Y/N," he held his nose, ducking his head a few times to stop the bleeding.

"That's what you get," you shrugged, waving your arms to keep yourself afloat.

"Ugh," Leo groaned. "CAN WE GO BACK NOW?"

"Geez," you covered your ears. "You didn't have to yell that loud."

"YES," you heard Percy yell back, his voice like waves echoing throughout the ocean.

You looked at the campfire, only that it was like a dot of orange in the distance. Your friends were like moving shadows in the distance, dimly lit by the moonlight.

"Come on," Leo started swimming back towards the shore once his nose had slowed down its bleeding. You followed him, careful not to swim too fast and make your head squeeze tighter than it already was. As you surfaced on the edge, you saw Leo yell and tried to run after Percy, who was holding your clothes. “Hey! Get back here.”

Instead of answering, Percy just laughed and ran away towards the parking lot. Leo chased after him.

You stood up, shivering as the chilly air hit you, grabbing your towel and wrapping yourself with it. Instead of running after Leo, you took a seat in front of the fire, with your arm reached out and dangerously close to the flames. Who could blame you for wanting to feel some warmth?

“You could get burned,” Leo commented, making you look at him in surprise. You thought he was with Percy grabbing his clothes, but there he stood, wearing a towel wrapped around his waist. Your eyes dangerously drift down towards his collarbone, but you shook your head, focusing your gaze on the dancing flames in front of you.

“At least I could be warm,” is what you told him as your fingers still dance dangerously close to the flames.

“Here,” Leo offered you a hand, and you stared as if it was the most disgusting thing you ever saw. To be honest, it wasn’t disgusting. You noticed his fingers were long and slender and smooth - no calluses in sight. It must be a benefit from producing flames.

“What do I do with it?”

“Hold it.”

“No.”

“Your loss,” he shrugged, taking a seat across from you.

“So, where’s Percy?” You asked him.

“Gone,” he sighed, running his fingers through his curls. “They said we should work everything out and they’ll come to fetch us in the morning.”

Unbelievable. Still, what they had done didn't surprise you. It was like them to do something like this, you should have seen it coming. Instead, the temptation for a good time blinded you.

“Go on,” you told him. “Yell at me.”

“What?” Leo said in disbelief. “What do you want me to yell at you?”

“I don’t know,” you told him, shrugging. “What were you saying about me after we met?”

“I wasn’t saying anything about you,” Leo answered defensively.

“You so were,” you rolled your eyes.

“Really?” Leo scoffed, crossing his arms. “What was I saying then?”

“That I was rude,” you answered him, sitting up straight.

“That’s true,” Leo agreed. “You were rude. And you are being rude now.”

“Well, excuse me if I was being rude,” You laughed humorlessly. “I was busy and stressed that day. I was being chased by monsters all day until Grover and Percy found me, and I was tired."

“But that doesn’t excuse you from being such a jerk at camp,” Leo argued.

“Sorry I wasn’t feeling bright and cheery as you,” you retorted. “Gosh, you were annoying.”

“You think I was annoying?” Leo asked, offended.

“You were!” You stood up, clenching the towel that was wrapped around you. “You came in all Mr. Smiley Pants, greeting me with a cheer, and then you introduced yourself and told me your life story when I’m exhausted. Gods, Leo, I just wanted to rest that day.”

“But you didn’t have to be so rude about it,” Leo stood up too, walking to stand in front of you. If he thought he was towering over you, he was not. He was only a few inches above you, not even intimidating you with his height.

“What’s rude about ‘stop, I want to rest’ when you were all there smiling and I was a bleeding mess with monster cuts on my arms?” You fumed. “Not to mention, you were telling me that time you and your beloved Festus had to stop at a gas station.”

“And what’s wrong about that?” Leo raised his arms in frustration. “Festus was hungry, and I was out of Tabasco, so we had to take a quick stop at the nearest gas station for some motor oil.”

“Okay, you were out of Tabasco sauce,” You raised your free hand in surrender. “But is that necessary for a girl to hear when she’s bleeding out?”

“Oh, would you want me to tell you the story of how my parents conceived me?” Leo retorted. “Because I’ll gladly tell you! My mommy and my daddy-.”

“I want you to stop!” You yelled at him, getting so dangerously close to his face. Leo seriously frustrated you to no end. He can’t just keep his mouth shut. “I want you to stop talking for a long time. Maybe then, I could work everything out by myself and leave you here.”

“And what?” Leo taunted. “Face the woods alone? Ooh, too bad, Y/N, you could get killed.”

“I’ll gladly take that chance,” you said through gritted teeth. “Than be here with you.”

“Wow,” Leo feigned hurt, putting a hand above his heart. “Another girl who’d rather be killed than be with me. Only this time, I didn’t ask her out.”

“What, do you want me to ask you out?” The words that rolled out of your mouth surprised you more than they did to Leo, who looked at you with wide eyes. You felt your heart pounding in your chest, unable to think of anything to follow up on your previous statement.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d think that you actually like me,” Leo said slowly, a lopsided grin forming on his face as he crossed his arms.

“Please,” you shivered as a strong chilly wind came, knocking you off of your stern demeanor. Leo grinned at this, knowing he had the upper hand in the situation as he didn’t once shiver from the cold. “You don’t know any better than a coked-up 2-year-old.”

“Oh, really?” Leo’s eyebrow shot up as if what you said was a challenge to him. “I know you’re cold right now.”

“Of course, it’s mid-December,” You threw your free hand in the air, turning back around to sit in front of the fire again. All this arguing with Leo has put you away from the campfire and near to the ocean, as you could feel the cold rushing winds more than the warmth of the fire. “It should be cold.”

“Way to point that out, you genius,” Leo followed you as you sat, taking a seat beside you. It was far enough so that your hands wouldn’t reach him in case you wanted to strangle him, but near enough in case you burned your hand and he had to help you.

You were still shivering even as you sat in silence in front of the fire. Leo was probably not helping the case as he kept getting awed by his own breath forming smoke in front of him.

“Could you please stop?” You said through shaky breaths.

“Here, take my hand,” Leo once again offered his hand. “Come on, I won’t bite. Can’t you feel the warmth radiating off of me?”

Out of options for warmth, you hesitantly reached out, your hand hovering above his, trying to feel any sort of warmth. Then you felt it. That rush of slight heat entered your skin and buried itself there. It felt much like holding a warm cup on a chilly day,

You took his hand, gripping it just to feel any warmth. It must have been a pretty uncomfortable position as both of your hands were stretched out, but you didn’t care as you could feel something other than the cold air around you.

You closed your eyes for a moment, trying so hard not to think about the fact that you were mad at him earlier and now you were holding his hand for warmth. You felt him scoot a little closer to you, as he pulled your hand a bit and felt him shift. You opened your eyes and narrowed it at him. “Sorry, my hand’s getting sore.” You sighed and just let him sit closer than the two of you intended.

You didn’t know how, but you didn’t fight the feeling of wanting to feel more warmth as you scooted closer to him - dangerously close, almost shoulder to shoulder. You let out a sigh as the warmth coming from him intensified a bit, as you laid your head above his shoulder. You didn't know why, but he didn’t make a move to push you away, not even a bit as he relaxed and laid his head on top of yours.

“Pipes, quick, grab a camera,” you heard Percy loudly whisper. It must have been morning as you hear birds chirping instead of crickets. The harsh sunlight met your hazel eyes as you opened them, making you immediately squint.

You heard a flash go off, and Piper’s voice rang out. “Oops. Sorry, my bad.”

“Whoever’s there should just get away,” you grumbled, snuggling against what’s beside you. Despite the harsh sunlight, your eyes flung open and quickly stood up, making your head spin, as you realized what - or who, for the matter - you’re snuggling. You stumbled as you clutched your head in dizziness.

“Careful there,” Jason gripped your arm, steadying you.

“What,” Leo groggily said, just waking up. “What happened?”

“We fell asleep, you idiot,” You threw a flip-flop at him. “It’s morning.”

“Oh,” Leo rubbed the spot where you hit him. “Oh, hey, guys.”

“Hey,” Percy greeted him with a smile. “Looks like you had quite a night, huh?”

“More like it,” Leo lazily smiled at you through squinting eyes.

Despite everything in you screaming to deny everything, you smiled at him. “Yeah. It was nice.”

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kinetic-elaboration · 2 years

Text

January 4: 3x15 Let That Be Your Last Battlefield

I watched an ep of TOS on my birthday, which was literally 3 weeks ago (??), but I completely forgot to type up my notes on it because, um, December I guess. But I must have a complete set so here is my attempt at reconstructing them at this late date. Probably going to be pretty incoherent but we’ll see.

A bacterial invasion! Nope, I don’t like that. (Even though people only suffer bacterial invasions on Star Trek so the Enterprise can be waylaid in helping them, but still.)

A stolen transporter ship?! That’s new.

Breaking the law breaking the law

The thieves are not responding. The creature may be suffocating? And Kirk’s like “well obviously we must help it.”

Yep, that is a creature.

My notes about “noxious potions” and “mystery organs” must be referring to Spock and McCoy dialogue.

Looks like the noxious potions worked all right this time.

“United Fleet of Planets.” No longer recall who said this, but I’m gonna guess… alien?

“Don’t you usually know whose property you’ve stolen?” Nah.

Kirk doesn’t care for technical evasions. (Unless he’s using them himself.)

“Mono-toned humans are all alike” lol. Pun intended.

“I’d like to study you please.” Hmm, again, I must assume this is a Spock (incorrect) quote.

I get such a kick out of Spock following Kirk.

“Something out there can’t be seen—explanation.” / “None.” That’s it, that’s the show.

Now they’re on a collision course… with nothing! I guess someone forgot to move the camera back and forth.

“Explain, Spock.” Lol. He is trying his best.

Spock wanted to study the craft.

No one claims anyone without due process. You tell him, Kirk.

Hmm, this history of oppression of one skin tone against another sounds extremely familiar.

Kirk is extremely by the book, as usual.

This guy wants to be taken home immediately but Kirk has two other missions to complete first; wait in line, dude.

Looks like Bele is multitasking

This camera movement on red alert, moving in and out on the red lights—not sure how I feel about that lol

Is there supposed to be repetition in this? I keep hearing the same lines over and over.

So the aliens are quite long lived.

The two aliens don’t seem the same to me, either in personality or really in appearance.

Someone like you… a monochrome human… ugh

It’s not funny but the way Sulu and Chekov look at each other at “ order of destruction” makes me laugh. Like ‘say what now?’

The ol’ corbomite maneuver, perhaps?

Imagine forgetting the destruct sequence at a crucial moment. I probably would. I’m not good with numbers.

The directing choices are so weird today: these eye close ups, the mouth close ups. I get it, it’s tense!

The destruct sequence IS real though; they use it in the Search for Spock. Kirk wasn’t bluffing.

“I control the computer; mine is the final command.” Dramatic.

“At warp 10, we’re going nowhere mighty fast.” Yeah, I’d say, that’s time travel speed.

It’s like a really, really big carnival ride.

“I make no deals for the control of this ship, Sir.”

And now, time for today’s utopian speech.

We must be scientifically accurate about what is and is not disgusting.

There is no persecution on Earth… so hard to believe that it makes me sad.

I wonder how Kirk feels about propagandizing on his ship?

“One thing we agree on is he took a shuttlecraft—he’s innocent until proven guilty.”

I don’t like this alien.

And now it’s story time with Spock hour. I wonder if Vulcan has racism, and if so, based on what criterion?

FINALLY we get around to decontamination. No more bacteria.

Now Spock is going to school him on basic evolution.

That was all they needed to do???? Just like circle the planet twice? These aliens are so fricking impatient. The time they wasted having a stare down with Kirk could have been spent just letting him do his job.

Mono-colored trash lol

Apparently the only thing worse than a white on right person is a white on left person

They’re all gone. Everyone is going to be gone.

There’s nobody alive on Cheron because of hate—that’s subtle.

(This is basically T100 also.)

Where he can go? No, I’m sobbing, that’s so sad.

They look like muppets when they run.

That was my last note lol. Not really reflective of how the ep actually ended. Overall, that was quite a pessimistic story for TOS.

it wasn't subtle but nevertheless it was hard to know what to make of it. It's weird to me that they at least sometimes seemed to depict Lokai and Bele as, like, equally bad. I kept expecting some twist to that, like some reason to think Lokai was bad, like maybe he was going to brainwash the crew into joining him or something, but it really seems like... he was oppressed and trying not to be oppressed and the worst anyone could say of him was "well you’re not dead yet so I guess you’re not THAT oppressed; put your money where your mouth is loser.”

The history of oppression against Lokai’s people is not even in contention. Bele admits it! And no one on the Enterprise really seems to care. They were extremely unpartisan about it to a degree that was a little disheartening

On the one hand, I do appreciate that Bele thought they were taking sides but they were actually just following their own principles--their treaties, their rules about due process, etc. In other words, being neutral and fair to all DOES protect the weaker party. You don’t need to be partisan, even in cases of admitted past and possibly continuing oppression, to come to the right outcomes. It was just weird that Lokai was in many ways really sympathetic and they were often on his side (we can both agree he stole a shuttlecraft) but then sometimes it was more "well you're all wrong for fighting at all” without any real empathy for the situation. It’s easy to be simplistic about it from the point of view of outsiders.

So I had mixed feelings. There were interesting aspects. But I wasn’t sure what the ultimate morality of the story was, and thus I wasn’t sure if I agreed or not, and if I didn’t, I probably really didn’t.

One thing that was interesting was that, to the extent that this was an unsubtle allegory for white racism against Black people in America, it was framed as if the real, or at least worst, oppression was in the past—Lokai was angry about Bele’s people previously treating his like property, basically, and he’s also angry that the two peoples aren’t equal now, and Bele doesn’t deny that’s true. Their beef with each other now is that Lokai still feels his people are treated as inferior and Bele… still doesn’t really disagree, he just thinks Lokai should be more patient about how fast they work toward equality. And what I think is interesting about that is it fits pretty well onto the America of the 1960s: slavery’s over and yeah it’s not great equality wise but you gotta be patient, etc. But where are we now? I guess you could argue we’re in the same place but I feel like the line now is actually it IS over, this is just what equality looks like, and if you feel unequal, it’s probably your fault. What would Lokai have to say to that?

I liked how showing that Bele didn't understand how the monochrome humans saw him and Lokai as the same, revealed the arbitrariness of racial distinction, which isn’t like groundbreaking for me personally but was ballsy to show in 1969. And it’s a good use of sci fi as commentary: it’s easier to see the truth about yourself and the arbitrary things in your society if you see it in metaphor form. Also, the difference between the two races being arbitrary didn’t change the history between them or the wrongs they had done or felt the other had done—arbitrary doesn’t mean fake and it certainly doesn’t mean inconsequential. I thought that was illustrated well too. I was undoubtedly on Lokai’s side but it has nothing to do with the colors on his face, which have no significance to me.

Also, Kirk pointing out that the very presence of black and white on both of them implies there once all black and all white variants and they interbred…. How to unpack that lol? That beings will always find some way to find differences between themselves?

And I did find the end... touching, and I thought there was something to the idea that their hatred really was so all consuming that it outlived even the stakes, no matter how real or big those stakes were. It was an uncomfortable conclusion, but I’m a fan of reasoning from the extremes and I think, again, this being a sci fi story, it was able to do that more than a story literally about American racism could.

I also think there’s something to the idea that their fight was ultimately personal and individual—by definition, right, everyone else was dead but they continued to fight—but on the other hand, it was still so tied to all of these generations of conflict. Like it was both at once. They were dependent on each other specifically for meaning, being the hunted or the hunter, but they were also very tied to their identities and histories, which I don’t even fault them for entirely (especially Lokai). Something, something, individuality and group affiliation, not really sure. Could they have forgotten, just let it all go? And then, is there really any other reasonable choice?

So, overall, I appreciated the moral and the complexity of the comparison, even when it made me uncomfortable or I wasn't sure about it, and I think that's a sign of a good metaphor. But on a purely entertainment level, the story didn’t do much for me.

I was also a little uncertain of Kirk here, and just some of the … basic plot elements. Kirk seemed like he wasn’t being anywhere near careful enough with the aliens, just letting them roam around his ship. Like, to a degree that at some point the only way for the plot to end the alien threat and bring Kirk back into control was for him to literally say “how about you stop now?” and for the alien to respond “oh, okay,” for pretty much no reason at all. The corner they were written into just needed to be waved away. Also, the whole episode seemed a little distracted. There were repetitions that I thought were thematically relevant to the presence of the twins but like… were really not about anything at all.

I did think the ep had a bit of S3 fatigue overall. But it gave me a lot to think about. Very interesting.

#the year 2022 #2022: fandom thoughts #2022: star trek #star trek tos

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chilling-seavey · 3 years

Text

Anything But Mine - The ‘Work Wife’

A/N Inspired by this tiktok; Florence meets Daniel’s ‘work wife’

Tuesday, December 15, 2026

Florence watched the elevator numbers tick up to 8 and then the doors slid open onto the floor. She was wrapped in her winter coat, legs clad in grey sweats and hair tied back in a haphazard ponytail and the stroller pushed in front of her. Two-year-old Lucy was asleep in the stroller, bundled up in her coat and hat and mitts and boots, already starting to miss her naptime. Florence was only hoping she wouldn’t wake up while at Daniel’s work because one look at her father and Lucy would never get back to sleep until he came home at the end of the day.

It had been a while since Florence had visited the studio and a new secretary sat behind the welcome desk. She was talking on the phone but hung up when she saw the guest approaching.

“Hi honey. What can I do for you?” she asked in a sickeningly sweet voice.

“Just here to drop off Daniel’s laptop.” Florence answered with a tired sigh and a half smile as she set the bag on top of the desk. “He forgot it this morning.”

“That sounds like him! Wait, are you Florence?” the secretary smiled widely, “Oh my God, I’m meeting the other woman.”

Florence’s eyebrows furrowed a moment in confusion.

The young lady continued, “I’m sure you’ve heard lots about me.”

“No, actually.” Florence spoke slowly, eyeing her up carefully.

“You haven’t? Wow, Daniel’s keeping us a secret. How scandalous!” the lady giggled youthfully, “I’m Alexa. I’m Daniel’s work wife!”

Florence’s eyebrow peaked and she shifted in place, “His what?”

“His work wife! Funny story how that came to be; it started because I just always got his coffee exactly how he likes it in the morning, right when he came in! I just understood him on, like, a spiritual level!”

Florence had to work hard to keep her facial expression flat, “He’s allergic to coffee.”

“Oh, haha, I wondered why he never drank it! He is just too nice to even correct me, I guess. Silly man.”

“Can you just tell him I’m here?” Florence asked impatiently, tapping her fingers on top of the desk, her right hand still held protectively around the handle of the stroller.

“Oh, I’m sorry, he’s in a session right now and asked not to be disturbed. I’ll tell him you came by and I’ll leave this on his desk for him.” Alexa took the laptop bag and slung it over her own shoulder. “He’s been working so hard. I was just thinking that Dan and I have been staying here for so many late hours together recently that I probably see him more than you do! You poor thing. We take good care of each other though.”

“Dan?” Florence nearly gagged.

“We have little nicknames for each other.” Alexa giggled.

“Right.” Florence scowled.

“Anyway, I’ll let you go. You look tired. Babies keeping you busy?”

Florence couldn’t even get out a response before Alexa was stepping out from behind the desk and was heading down the hallway.

“I bet. Nice meeting you, Florence! Be good to our husband. I’m watching!”

As expected, Daniel came home a bit later than usual that night. Lucy had already been put to bed and Penelope and Clementine were just eating their bedtime snack when he came home. The two girls came running at the sound of the door and Daniel crouched down to give them equal amounts of kisses over each little cheek. They were already in their pyjamas and Daniel scooped up Penelope into his arms on the way back into the living room.

Florence was on the couch when he came in, her face flat.

“Thanks for bringing my bag today. I would have come to get it but I was so busy.”

She turned slightly when he leaned down to kiss her so all he got was her cheek.

Daniel frowned and set Penelope down so she could join Clementine back at their table to finish their snack. He sat down beside his wife, “What’s going on?”

“Just wondering if you’d prefer to go home to your other wife.”

“My what?” Daniel was taken back.

“Your other wife. Alexa. And your probable other kids too.”

Daniel couldn’t get a rebuttal out before the girls were bounding back over to him.

“Daddy, can you tuck us in?” Clementine asked eagerly, grabbing the sleeve of his sweater.

“Of course.” he put on a smile for his daughters but was concerned about Florence’s statement and he thought about it the entire time he tucked his eldest two into bed and read them a story and kissed them good night.

Florence was still on the couch when he returned from the hallway and he sat back down beside her with a tired sigh. She ignored him.

“Wanna tell me why you think even the concept of another wife would graze my mind?” he asked quietly.

“How long as Alexa worked there?”

“Few months. Maybe five. Why? Did she say something to you today?”

“Yeah. She said a fucking lot.” Florence scoffed. Her arms stayed crossed over his chest and she stared at the ground coldly. “I’m not the other woman first of all. And I’m not going to stand there and be ridiculed by a college freshman about how you and her are fucking in love or some bullshit.”

“She really said that?” Daniel’s eyes went wide.

“Yeah. Called herself your ‘work wife’…that you two just ‘get each other’…that ‘Dan and I spend so many late nights together haha’. Fucking bitch.”

Daniel’s face literally contorted in disgust, “Ugh, I hate ‘Dan’.”

“I know. And why haven’t you told her you’re allergic to coffee? She’s going around flaunting that she knows your order like it fucking matters.”

“She’s…she just seemed nice and I felt badly.”

“Well don’t! She thinks a cup of coffee is the start of a goddamn affair. What have you been doing with her after hours?”

“She’s not even there half the time after hours.” Daniel answered easily, honestly. “So put any idea of that out of your mind right now.”

“You’re not our husband.” Florence grumbled, turning her head away from him. “How dare she even say that to me.”

“Hey. I know.” Daniel shuffled closer and set his hand on her cheek to pull her gaze towards him. “I’m only yours. I promise.”

Florence sniffled and nodded lightly. Daniel tilted her head up to kiss her lips, lingering there a moment just so she could feel it and when he pulled back, she let out a little sigh.

“I’m sorry she said that shit. I’ll talk to her. That’s not okay.” Daniel whispered, resting back against the couch beside her and Florence shuffled to curl into his side.

“She said I look tired.” Florence mumbled sadly, “Do I look tired? Am I letting motherhood steamroll me?”

“No way.” Daniel tisked, sliding his arm around her waist to hold her close, “You are steamrolling motherhood.”

Florence chuckled lightly.

“I’m serious.” Daniel pressed a kiss to her forehead and slid his hand down to her bum, “Always have been and always will be the sexiest woman in the room to me.”

“Even like this?” Florence sniffled, leaning back from his shoulder so he could get a good look at her; messy hair and few little breakouts over her cheeks and dark circles under her eyes.

Daniel smiled, giving her bum a little squeeze as his other hand reached up to caress her face, “Especially like this. There is no other woman in the entire world that I would ever give a second glance to and especially not Alexa. I am wholeheartedly yours.”

Florence leaned up to kiss his lips a few soft times before nuzzling into his neck. He smiled and wrapped his arms right around her.

“You had no clue she was flirting with you, did you?” Florence asked after a while.

“Mm, no, I really didn’t.” Daniel admitted.

“You’re so innocent, Daniel James.” Florence giggled.

“Am not.” Daniel tisked. “But, listen, I’m going to buy you a nice dress for my work Christmas party this Friday and you’re going to dress up just how you like to and you’ll feel like the most beautiful woman in the room and I won’t be leaving your side all night.”

“You don’t have to buy me a dress.” Florence laughed lightly.

“Yeah, I do. A nice tight one with a low cut…” his fingers trailed down her clothed body. “Gonna blow everyone away.”

And that’s exactly what happened. Daniel bought Florence a pretty red dress specifically for the party and a matching red tie of his own. They showed up to his work party in dress and suit down to their polished black shoes and perfectly done hair and you’d be surprised to think they even had three children. Walking into the venue Florence truly felt like a million bucks and the proud smile that was on her face was only proof to her husband that his idea worked.

They mingled around the various groups, sitting at their table with Jack and his fiancé for a little bit, and eventually finding Alexa by the bar.

“Wow, Florence, you clean up well.” the young woman spoke straightly.

“Thank you.” Florence answered politely, hand still tucked in Daniel’s arm as they waited for their drinks. She had been raised in this exact setting; formalwear and conniving strangers, so Florence worked it like an expert.

Daniel was proud of Florence’s politeness in front of the woman who tried to ruin them a little if not at all but when Daniel was called over to speak with his boss, Florence lingered back at the bar a moment. She eyed up Alexa’s tight short dress and messy curls and leaned in towards her with a calm smile, her two diamond rings on display around her glass in the direction of the young lady, “If you go anywhere near my husband in any way, shape, or form that is anything except professional, I will see to it that you’re fired faster than you can say ‘mine’. So back off.”

Florence returned to Daniel’s side, shooting a glare at the young woman over her shoulder as Daniel’s arm slid around her waist protectively. Like hell she was ever going to let someone get in the way of her perfect catch.

#anything but mine #daniel seavey #why dont we #daniel seavey imagines

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solartranslations · 2 years

Text

AF2 Ash: Days with Ash

Ash speaks of Arcana Famiglia…

Ash: “Arcana Famiglia”

Ash: They are the vigilante organization that protects the small trade island of Regalo

Ash: This is the story of those with Arcana powers, and their curious fates…

Ash: It’s no use resisting. Settle down, Strawberry Head

(*smirk) Ash: The Tarocco used to be mine…I’m taking it back

Felicita: [Ash was an intruder who stole the Tarocco from the Family]

(*block) Ash: Attacks like that won’t work on him!!

Felicita: [Even though we were enemies, Ash still protected me from the skeletons]

Ash: I want to fix this somehow. So I want your help

Ash: All I wanted was to return the Tarocco to this ship…

Ash: This can’t go on. I’ll lose my…precious family

Felicita: [I wanted to know more about Ash and what was in his heart]

Felicita: [So I ended up using Gli Amanti’s powers without a single thought]

Ash: If there’s a power that lets you impersonate another, then it’s not strange for there to be one that lets you read minds

Ash: Does that mean everything you’ve said up until now is just you repeating whatever you saw in my heart?

Ash: How am I wrong!!

Ash: Show me your stigmata

Felicita: [I didn’t even try to communicate with him, so it’s no wonder that Ash was angry with me for reading his heart]

Ash: I’ll do something about Joshua on my own. You stay out of it

Felicita: […I had it coming]

Ash: Guh…ugh…I can’t…I really can’t do this on my own…

Felicita: [He closed off his heart]

Felicita: [But I still went to face Ash]

Felicita: [And I revealed my stigmata to him]

Ash: Your stigmata…

Ash: Why are you going so far?

Felicita: [I wanted to believe in Ash]

Felicita: [And I wanted him to believe in me]

Ash: Felicita, I’m moved by your courage

Ash: …And I want give you a proper answer…

Felicita: [He told me about his past]

Felicita: [And why he wanted to save Joshua so badly]

Felicita: [Like how I wanted to save Papa back then, it made me want to help him even more too]

Felicita: Let’s go see Joshua

Ash: Thank you…Felicita

Felicita: [And so the Wheel of Fortune began to turn]

Ash: …The Tarocco connects this ship and your son…

Ash: I’ll…be fine on my own now

Felicita: [Once freed from his bonds to the Tarocco, Joshua passed on with countless other lights]

Felicita: [With a warm smile on his face]

Felicita: [Ash stayed with the Family after that]

Ash: I’m glad I met you…and I’m thankful to both of them for guiding me here

Ash: I can’t decide if I’ll join Arcana Famiglia yet…but

Ash: When I hold you like this, I feel like wanting to stay…

Felicita: [I saw a part of myself in Ash]

Felicita: [Being near him felt comfortable so I sort of started relying on him]

Felicita: […I know I can’t stay like this…]

Felicita: [It’s been almost a year since I joined the Family]

Felicita: [I think…the time has come for me to change even more now]

~*End of Scene*~

(Continue to Common Route December 1)

(Back to Directory)

#ash #arcana famiglia #arcana famiglia 2 #solar translations #psp game #translation #releases

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imbellarosa · 3 years

Note

Hiii! I was wondering if you read fanfic?? And if so, what are your fav tropes/works??

Hi!!!! I read A LOT of fic from A LOT of fandoms! My fav tropes are either flat comedy or enemies to friends to lovers or friends to lovers or something like that! I only read happy endings, but I don’t mind some angst in the middle. Idk what fandom you’re looking for so I’m gonna give you a list of some of my all time favs from EVERY fandom, and I’ll add one that I’ve written!

Walk That Mile by purpledaisy- 150k words 1D enemies to friends to lovers road trip AU across the US for a fun, banter-y time with some real communication issues that really get resolved well. People always say that a rom com should have a good answer for “why can’t they be together NOW?” And this one does it really well! No real angst, and a lot of fun.

Have Love, Will Travel by @kingsofeverything - 97k words 1D YouTubers on a roadtrip AU! If you liked the first one on this list, you’re gonna love this one too! Sweet and long and full of the memories you would make on a road trip. Lots of laughs with this one, and I wish I could see the “Have Road, Will Travel” video series irl!

Tell Me Now, Tell Me Now by @vanillabeanniall - 55k words 1D Miraculous Ladybug AU but you don’t need to watch the show to ADORE it - I know that I sure do!! Funny and sweet and SUPER ironic, with superheroes and Paris mixed in and great characters! Who wouldn’t love it?

So Let’s Cross the Lines We’ve Lost by thecoloursneverfade - 165k words 1D friends to enemies to friends to lovers uni AU that was one of the first that I read in the fandom and really made me fall in love! Good friends, some angst, hard convos that lead to real growth, and lots of really great characters. This feels real, for a lack of a better word, and is always compelling.

Ain’t That A Kick in the Head by keysmashlesbian, wreckingtomlinson (karasunonolibero) - 23k words 1D comedy AU ft. football player!Louis, Disaster gay!Harry, memes, frogs, head dives, Blue Coolattas (whatever those are), and a very sassy Red Robin waitress named Fiona. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve read it, and I always laugh, and I always find something new to fall in love with.

Leave it To the Breeze by @hattalove - 82k words 1D GBBO AU. This one feels like a warm hug. It’s gentle, fun, has great characters, believable angst, has you rooting for more than one of the characters to win, and is also hilarious, somehow. I’ve read this fic over and over and over, and I especially do it when I have time before a new season of GBBO. Also, have snacks!! It makes me hungry

The Section by bananaheathen - 11k words 1D Uni AU with grad student TAs, sophomore undergrads, art classes, movie analysis, and final essays as methods of seduction. Also, nicknames, nude models, a Halloween party, and absolutely shameless flirting. I loved it, and laughed the whole way through.

I’ve Heard it Both Ways by @adoredontour - 26k words 1D Psych AU. I love this one. I love the fic, I love psych, I love the author. I’ve read most of her works, but this one has such a special place in my heart. Go read it!!

Play it All Night Long by janine_tangerine - 43k words SPN radio AU with DJ!Dean and bartender!Cas, with music, annoying coworkers, sassy siblings, and lots of love. WHOAH WHATS THIS A LIVEJOURNAL FIC??? I know but I read this ages ago, and it has music EMBEDDED WITHIN THE FIC! It was my first introduction to Bob Dylan, who remains one of my favorite artists of all time.

Crossroads State by Mercy - 51k words SPN slice of life AU with Mechanic!Dean, Teacher!Cas, Law Student!Sam, and lovely lovely moments. All sweet, some tension, but no real angst. I read this forever ago, and still come back and back and back to it.

Peace and Good Luck to All Men by KismetJeska - 31k words SPN College Au. DO YOU MEAN THE BEST CHRISTMAS FIC EVER OF ALL TIME??? I read this on the first day of December every year, and it makes me laugh every time. Cas falls in love with his sister’s boyfriend, Gabe and Luke are in a seduction competition, Michael is tired of everyone, and Dean doesn’t know what hit him.

For All You Young Hockey Players, Pay Attention by @thursdaysfallenangel - 144k words SPN enemies to lovers hockey AU. Just. Please go read this. Gorgeous and still one of the best fics in the whole fandom, imo. Cas is the new transfer on Dean’s team, and Dean doesn’t like change.

The Complete Works of Emmanuel Allen by @violue - 54k words SPN small town AU ft. writer!Cas and local business owner!Dean. Dean meets his favorite author, but does not know it’s him. Shenanigans ensue, with a lovely warm feel. Dean builds a mausoleum and owns cats and lives in the woods. Cas needs a change of scene. Sam thinks everyone needs some more company.

The Mirror by cloudyjenn - 25k words SPN parallel universe AU. This was one of the first fics I ever read, and I still love it. Dean touches an enchanted mirror and travels through universes in search of an answer to a question he hasn’t asked. Full of love, family, and companionship.

Asunder by rageprufrock - 24k words SPN AU with Social worker!Dean, Doctor!Cas, Sober!Sam, and RUBY!!! Ugh I love this fic for Ruby alone. This one is more bittersweet. Dean hasn’t spoken to Sam in years due to his struggles with addiction. Sam, now sober, is getting married, and has invited him. Dean can’t face his family alone.

But It’s a Good Refrain by lady_ragnell - 23k words Merlin Radio AU! Merlin has an anonymous gossip radio show, and someone calls in to put Arthur on blast! Morgana is a fan, Arthur is not amused, and a sort of enemies to lovers thing occurs. Just lovely, and it makes me laugh every time.

And Like the Cycle of the Year, We Begin Again by @katherynefromphilly - 208k words Merlin canon compliant. This is the Season 6 we should have had. If you’re at all into this fandom, go read it - it’s still an all time fav for me. Hundreds of years later, Arthur walks out of the lake. Merlin has been waiting.

Give The Dragon a Chili by @supercalvin - 47k words Merlin magical AU based on the story in New Zealand of the cat stealing someone’s underwear. Merlin’s dragon is sort of a thief.

Fundamental Imperfection by Starlingthefool - 12k words Merlin famous author AU. Arthur likes Dickens. Merlin does not. They get into it on a panel, and twitter stan wars ensue. And enemies to friends to lovers where literary arguments are an expression of love, and stories are magical.

The Student Prince by FayJay - 145k words Merlin Uni AU. What a classic!! It’s a magical realism royal enemies to friends to lovers AU ft. a dragon in the walls, a lovely gay soc, Gwen as a Muggle, and some really great characters and moments. Do yourself a favor and go read this one.

Call it Love by @dalek-in-heels - 30k words Merlin RPF. UGH THIS ONE!!! Okay 1.) the author is one of my best friends, and she’s amazing! 2.) lovely fic that takes place at the end of Merlin, and still has one of my all-time favorite misunderstandings in fic ever. “Yogurty Heart” is my favorite way to say I love you.

If Nobody Speaks of Remarkable Things by @watsonshoneybee - 35k words Sherlock AU canon compliant through season 3. This one is sad, but the title is taken off of one of my favorite books, and the writing is gorgeous - as is the characterization. Happy ending, though! I promise! So the journey is all worth it!

In All of the Lives We Are by @dalek-in-heels - 20k words The Magicians canon compliant through the first half of season 3. Sarah does it again and writes one of the best fics I’ve ever read. Art as therapy, a sweet love story in more than one universe, and finding the will to keep going through the worst days. The writers of the actual show should have read this fic and put it on the screen. This is my canon.

A Happy Ending? Sure Enough by me (imbellarosa) - 8k words The Magicians canon compliant up to season 4. This is the only one of mine I’m putting on the list, because I still really like this one! You need some context, but not much? Idk, just if you want to see how *I* write!

#fic recs!#anon asks #i answer #long post for ts #hey anon if you want a more targeted fic rec in one particular fandom come back and let me know #and i'll make you another list!

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chain-unchained · 3 years

Text

December 12 - Part 4

Guys this part is ridiculously long and I am so sorry. I never meant to drag this out for this long and I just wanted to get it done. It’s important to the plot but I will be glad to get back to soft fluff. Anyway, hope you can enjoy this long ass read!

The spirits must have been on their side that day, for the impact of the Slime didn’t kill them outright. There was time to cut them free, and then he could hopefully use a warp totem to get them all out before the mine came crashing down upon their heads.

‘Just stay calm. You’ve trained with Marlon, you can do this.’

He held his sword aloft before him, then dashed in and cleaved the slime in two. Thus divided, it split into two smaller but still large slimes—Sam and Abigail were trapped in one, Sebastian in the other.

From the split also came several much smaller blobs, which eagerly latched onto Ashe’s legs in their fervent attempts to hug him. The more he cut the big one, the more smaller ones popped out and clung to him. In seconds, he had dozens of them weighing down his limbs; he couldn’t even move.

“No, please—let go!” He was begging, desperate, and he didn’t care. “Please!!!”

His friends were just one cut away from freedom, and they were just out of his reach. The quaking was unbelievable, and with the weight of the little slimes on his body he lost his balance and fell to his hands and knees.

And then came forth dozens of monsters from deeper within the mine; it was seconds that felt like minutes later that he was deafened by the sound of the ceiling and walls collapsing from where the monsters had fled.

A piece of the rocky walls dislodged and struck him on the back, knocking him flat down to the earth and pinning him there. The wind was knocked from his lungs, and his sword tumbled from his grip.

‘Is this it?’

It was impossible to get his breath back. The rock on his back crushed his chest more each time he tried. The larger slimes carrying his friends danced in a panic just out of his reach as more chunks of the walls and ceiling came crashing down around them.

‘I really just got us all killed by slimes... It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have ever brought them here with me.’ His head drooped, his cheek resting against the uncomfortably warm earth. For a brief moment, he could smell the forest. ‘I’m sorry guys… I’m sorry Shane... I'm sorry Mom… and Grandpa… Am I… gonna be reincarnated as a slime…?’

####

The world had gone dark, but now was swimming back into view. A clinical white ceiling greeted Ashe as he forced his heavy eyes open; his eyelids felt bruised. Actually, his entire body felt like it was just one massive bruise.

‘I’m… at the clinic?’

Gingerly, he sat up and looked around. The other beds in the recovery room bore Sebastian, Sam, and Abigail—all breathing. All alive. He sighed, relieved.

“…and that’s how I found them. Just like that.”

He heard Marlon speaking beyond the curtain dividers, and could faintly make out his silhouette along with Maru’s through them. They both spoke in hushed voices; Marlon was as composed and calm as ever, while Maru seemed to be borderline panicking.

“Thank Yoba that you did!” She wrung her hands anxiously. “Of course this happens on the one day Harvey’s not here.”

“Strange, that. He’s not one to leave town.”

“I know. But there’s a seminar being held in Zuzu City that he said he couldn’t miss.” The wringing intensified. “This is a worst-case scenario.”

“Were their injuries that severe?”

“No, somehow—bumps, cuts, scrapes, bruises, and Sebastian managed to break his foot. But I’m not—I’m only an assistant. I’m not qualified to administer any aid without Harvey present.”

“A bit late to worry about that now. Besides, you seemed to know what you were doing to me.”

“I mean—I have a basic understanding of first aid, but like I said, I’m not allowed to perform it without Harvey being here.”

Ashe’s shoulders slumped as he looked down at his lap. He’d gotten so many people involved in this mess. Gotten his friends hurt, and almost killed. Put Maru at risk of losing her job.

The curtains abruptly were tugged open, and he jumped a little.

“Oh—you’re awake!” Maru sounded relieved, though still anxious. “Thank Yoba. How do you feel?”

“Uh—f-fine,” he fibbed with a meek smile, “just fine.”

He looked to Marlon, and the smile faded. The old swordsman’s face was as stoic as it ever was, but he could see the disappointment in his eyes.

“Never thought you’d lose to a slime, of all things. I suppose there’s a first time for everything, though.”

Ouch. That stung.

Across from his bed, Sebastian began to stir, and Maru quickly rushed to her half-brother’s side. “Sebastian…?”

“Ugh…” He groaned and lightly pushed her face away. “Give me a little space, would you?”

“Oh, Sebastian!”

Without warning she flung her arms around him in a tight hug. “I was so scared! I thought you were going to die!”

“Fuck’s sake—why does everyone try to choke me—” He tried in vain to pry her off of him. “Why the hell do you care, anyway?”

“What do you mean, why do I care?!” She pulled back, an angry expression on her tearful face. “You’re my big brother, of course I’m going to care about what happens to you!”

A flicker of guilt flashed across Sebastian’s face, and he looked away. “… Half brother.”

“Oh my Y—like that matters! Geez! You could at least apologize for scaring me and mom half to death!”

“I didn’t ask you to worry ab—” He stopped mid sentence. “You told mom?”

“Well, yeah!” She curled into herself a bit. “I kinda panicked and… maybe called Jodi too. And Caroline.”

“Yoba damnit,” he rubbed his forehead, “it’s not Mom’s business what I do. It’s not any of our mom’s business.”

Maru poked her fingers together. “I know. Look, I’m sorry, but I just—panicked, like I said. Harvey’s not here, and I didn’t know what to do. Besides, they were going to find out eventually, and they’d be even more upset then.”

“Shit, our moms are gonna finish the job for the slimes.” Sam had been awake for a minute at that point, just lying there listening to things play out as he came to.

Same for Abigail, who pushed herself to sit. “Well, fat lot of good putting fake names in the logbook did,” she said in a deadpan voice. “It’s been nice knowing you guys. Any second now they’re going to come bursting in through the door.”

“Er, actually… they’re in the waiting room.”

“Great.” She looked to Sebastian and Sam. “Might as well get it over with.”

Looking somewhat apologetic, Maru stepped out to fetch their mothers. There was a heavy air hanging in the room. It was awful.

“… How did you know we were in trouble?” Ashe asked of Marlon, who was still standing off to the side.

“Rasmodius reached out to me. Apparently the Junimos asked him to help you, and he in turn asked me.”

To say it was surprising was an understatement. Ashe didn’t think that the little spirits cared all that much for him, especially not since he hadn’t done much to fulfill their requests yet—

Once again the curtains were yanked abruptly open. There stood Robin, and Jodi, and Caroline, all wearing the look of mother bears on the rampage in search of their cubs. Terrifying didn’t even begin to describe the aura radiating from them.

“What were you thinking—”

“You nearly got yourselves killed—”

“How many times have I told you how dangerous those mines are—”

Their voices all overlapped in their attempts to admonish their children. There was no doubt that they were relieved to see them alive and well—the fact that they were so incensed was proof of that.

The heavy ball of guilt weighing down Ashe’s stomach compelled him to speak above them. “It’s not their fault.” In that instant, all their heads snapped to look at him instead of their children, and memories of such reprimands by his own mother flashed in his minds’ eye. “It’s mine,” he continued, somehow managing to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat. “I’m the one who brought them into the mines with me.”

“Wh—it is not your fault, Ashe,” Sam insisted emphatically.

Sebastian nodded. “We’re the ones who asked to come along.”

“And I’m the one who got us into that situation,” added Abigail. “You told us that it was dangerous.”

There was a long moment of silence—awkward, heavy, painful silence. It was broken by the sound of Harvey all but skidding into the recovery room, looking mightily disheveled and thoroughly winded.

“Dr. Harvey!” Maru was relieved, and quickly sought shelter behind him.

“Ladies—” Hastily he attempted to straighten his lopsided tie and glasses, “I understand that you are concerned for their wellbeing, but I cannot allow you to stress my patients out. Much less before I’ve been able to examine them myself.”

“How can you expect us to be calm about all of this?” Robin gestured angrily towards her son, who was lying there with a look that begged to be put out of his misery. “We’ve told them countless times how dangerous those mines are, and they still went in!”

Harvey chose his words carefully. “With all due respect… they may be your children, but they are no longer children. At some point, you have to allow them to make their own decisions. Even if they still live under your roof. If you don’t, then they will be pressured into doing things like this behind your back.” He cleared his throat. “Now, please. I need to be able to examine them myself. Maru, could you bring them back to the waiting room?”

His tone left no room for arguments, and they reluctantly followed Maru out of the recovery area and back to reception. The four in the beds were stunned.

“Uh… Thanks for sticking up for us like that,” Sam said as the doctor pulled his wheely stool over to Sebastian’s bed.

“Hm? Oh, there’s no need to thank me for that. I only did what I felt was in your best interests as my patients.” With a faint smile curling up the ends of his mustache Harvey started to examine Sebastian. “I only got a little bit of the story over the phone with Maru—what exactly happened?”

Ashe swallowed guiltily, and began to recount the misadventure to him before the others could. Harvey just listened and nodded his head, moving from examining Sebastian to setting his broken foot in a cast. For a mercy, it was a brief summary. “… and Marlon brought us here,” he finished in a soft voice, picking at the thin white blanket covering his legs. “That’s pretty much it.”

“Well,” Harvey scooted over to Sam, “we can thank Yoba that things weren’t any worse. They could very well have been.”

Ashe cast his eyes back down to his lap. “I’m sorry…”

“I didn’t say it to guilt you.” He smiled again. “Rather the opposite; there’s no need to dwell on what might have been. You’re all alive and safe now, and that’s what matters. That being said,” he swiveled around to Abigail’s bed, “it might be a good idea to stay out of the mines for the time being.”

“That won’t be an issue.” Marlon finally spoke again. “There was a massive collapse in the lower levels. Joja will want to close the mines to the public indefinitely.”

“Well there we go then.”

After a minute, it was Ashe’s turn, and he sullenly allowed Harvey to give him a thorough once-over. All he’d wanted was to fix up the community center; he didn’t want to put anyone in danger.

‘But that’s not really true. What I really wanted was something to distract myself from thinking.’ The community center was just a means to an end, an excuse. And maybe, just maybe… maybe he’d hoped something like this would have happened. Maybe he’d really hoped that one of these times he wouldn’t end up coming out of the mines.

As soon as that thought came into his mind, he physically shook it away, earning himself quite a look from Harvey. ‘That’s not true! Not even a little! I’m only thinking like this because I feel so guilty.’ He looked down at his hands resting on his lap. Abby had been right; he couldn’t keep carrying on like this. It was tearing him apart.

After a few more minutes, Harvey was satisfied that Sebastian’s broken foot was the most severe injury among the four. He still needed to set the man up with a pair of crutches and show him how to use them, but was content to let the rest filter out of the recovery area and towards reception.

“Ugh, I’m not looking forward to getting home…” Sam’s voice dripped with dread. “Even if Mom listens to what Harvey said, it’s still gonna be awkward as hell. She’s probably gonna want me to pay for my bill.”

Abigail’s face fell at the thought. “Ugh, tell me about it. And we didn’t even get to bring back anything from the mines so we don’t have anything we can sell.”

Well, there was something that Ashe could do to start repairing the damage he’d caused. With the both of them lulling behind him, he pushed the swinging doors to reception open.

The mothers’ heads popped up at the sound, and the conversation they’d been having ceased at once. There was a sort of muted look on each of their faces, and Caroline and Jodi rose to give their kids what was a much-needed hug.

“Harvey’s helping Sebastian with crutches,” Ashe said to Robin, who had gone a bit pale when she saw that her son was not among them. “And, um… I’d like to pay for everyone’s medical bills.”

Surprise flickered across the faces of everyone in the room. He could see that Sam and Abby were opening their mouths to protest his offer, and so he hastily added, “It’s the least I can do.”

“Honey, the thought is appreciated,” Caroline put her hand on his shoulder, “but the bills are already taken care of. Just please, be more careful next time.” She turned to her daughter. “Let’s go, Abigail. We have a lot we need to talk about…”

One by one Ashe watched his friends file out of the clinic with their mothers. He did his best to put on a smile and wave them off; after all, they were able to leave on their own two feet (well, Sebastian on one). That was worth smiling about, wasn’t it?

“Are you gonna be okay?” Maru asked as he turned to pay for his own bill. “To walk home, I mean.”

“Yeah,” he nodded, still managing to smile, “I’ll be fine—”

No sooner had the door swung closed behind Jodi did it swing back open. “Ashe?” panted Shane, his face red from exertion and the cold of the evening air. He was still in his Joja uniform, which was disheveled from his haste to get to the clinic from the mart.

“Shane?” Ashe’s eyes widened in surprise as he turned to face him. They only widened further as the man strode forward and folded him into a gentle hug.

“Thank fuck…” he whispered in between breaths. He was shaking. “Maru made it sound like you were on your deathbed.”

“Oh, er—” Behind the counter, Maru fidgeted guiltily. “Sorry.”

A new lump formed in Ashe’s throat, taking the place of his voice so he couldn’t speak. It hit him in that moment just how differently things could have turned out, and how happy he was to see Shane again.

“I-I…” His chin quivered, and tears began to well up in his eyes as he brought his arms up to squeeze Shane back. “I-I’m sorry…!”

####

It was a slow walk back to the farm. Shane insisted on it, wanting Ashe to take it easy despite his insistence that he was just a little sore.

“Easy, easy does it,” the older man coaxed, helping Ashe up the front stairs—it was at that point that the pain really was catching up to him, and it showed. “I’ve got you.”

“Th-thanks…”

The stairs cleared, Shane held the door open for him. It was pleasantly warm inside the farmhouse, a welcome change from the bitter cold. Mr. Blue jumped over the back of the couch to greet them as they stepped inside, wending his way through both of their legs with audible purrs.

“I think he was worried about you.” Shane carefully nudged the orange cat out from around their feet so they could make it over to the couch. “Where do you keep your medicine and shit?”

With a wince Ashe let himself be lowered onto the cushions, the pain easing up just a touch when he did. “Uh… in the kitchen. Top left drawer next to the sink.”

“Okay. Sit tight.”

Ashe watched him root around in the drawer. “What are you looking for?”

“What do you think, dweeb? I’m looking for pain killers.” Shane looked at him. “You’re hurting pretty good, and don’t even try to deny it.” His fingers closed around what he was looking for, and he brought two small tablets back to Ashe along with a glass of water. “Here.”

“Oh, uh—thank you…” Ashe popped them into his mouth and took a sip of the water to help them down. “… I, um… I’m sorry.” He mumbled into the glass.

“You already said that, you know. Three times. On the way here.” Shane sighed and shook his head. “Seriously, what am I gonna do with you?”

“… I don’t know.” Setting the glass on the end table to his left, Ashe tugged his knees up against his chest and buried his face into them.

After a moment, Shane took the cushion next to him. “Ashe, what’s really going on here?” He asked. “There’s obviously something bothering you and making you not act like yourself.”

Silence. Then, “I miss her…”

“Your mom?” He wrapped an arm around Ashe’s shoulders as the farmer gave a tiny nod of his head. “I had a feeling. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I-I do, b-but… I-I’m scared that it’s gonna mess up your recovery somehow…”

“Bud, that’s not—those two things have nothing to do with each other. Seriously. And even if they did,” he gave a gentle squeeze, mindful of Ashe’s soreness, “I’m in a place now where I can handle it. And that’s got a lot to do with you. I’m not gonna force you to talk about it if you really don’t want to, but I’m here for you. You can lean on me for this.”

More silence. “I don’t remember what that’s like…” He sniffled, trying his hardest not to start bawling again. “I-I was taking care of Mom for so long that I forgot how to rely on others.”

“She was sick, right?”

“Y-Yeah. Cancer. I ended up taking her place at Joja so she could stay on their insurance.” There was another pause as he drew a deep shuddering breath. “I-I didn’t even get to attend her funeral. My b-boss wouldn’t give me the day off for it. It was the worst way to start the year.”

“Wait, this happened on New Years? This year?”

Ashe nodded again. “I-I didn’t really… y’know, have a chance to process any of it. Work, work work. And then I remembered Grandpa’s envelope, and… I came here. It was nice, having so much to do and people to distract me from… everything. But I can’t ignore winter no matter how hard I try…”

His voice broke, and the tears that he’d been trying so hard to hold back burst forth. “I-It’s not fair! She was all I had! I was all she had! A-And I was working so much that I couldn’t even be there for her most of the time! I had to watch her waste away from a distance! And now Joja wants to take even more way from me! It’s not fair! It’s not fair!!!!”

The room became filled with his anguished sobs, and Shane gently pulled him into another hug. “It’s not, you’re right. It never is.”

For what felt like forever, Ashe cried. He cried out the feelings that he’d kept pent up over the year. And when he had no more tears left to shed, he rested against Shane, completely spent.

“Did that help at all?” Shane’s voice was low and soothing as he brushed the bangs from Ashe’s face.

“… I don’t know…”

“That’s fine. It takes time.” He held him close. “Look, if you feel like you need to cry, come and cry on me. Okay? Doesn’t matter when or where it is.”

It took a moment, but Ashe nodded. He wondered if this was what Shane felt like when he was looking out at those cliffs on that rainy day…

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george-mackay-macfine · 4 years

Text

Dear Diary Prt. 15

Word Count: 1,750 (Roughly)

(I promise the word count is going to pick up again once we get through some of the shorter enteries, and into long ones again, at the moment we’re all just in Graces brain.)

December 25th, 2011

Dear Diary,

Happy Christmas!!

I don’t have time to go over the events of the morning right now, (Aunt Mildred sat me down and went over the first time she gave a blow job), Mum’s called me downstairs, apparently, I have a gift from Harry that came in the post.

I’ll write more soon!

Love Y/N,

December 27th, 2011

Dear Diary,

Sorry I didn’t write again the other day, after reminding myself about Aunt Mildreds blow job story I went downstairs and stole a bottle of vodka and spent the rest of the day drinking for God with my oldest cousin Jesse.

I did remember to drunkenly open Harry’s gift, it was a thick diary, with a handwritten note on the front page. It says;

Dear Y/N,

I didn’t know what to get you for Christmas but knew I had to get you something.

I always see you scribbling down in that old tattered diary of yours, so I thought I’d buy you a new one. Maybe when you write you’ll think of me.

Love Harry,

Isn’t that the sweetest! Harry Styles has to be the most thoughtful guy I have ever met.

Love, Y/N.

December 29th, 2011

Dear Diary,

I’m finally home. After an excruciating six days, (It was five an a half, but six makes me sound like a better daughter) with my family driving me mental about my medical degree, my love life, and how much wine I was drinking at dinner I’m finally home in my own bed.

Harry and Dean aren’t home until tomorrow, so I’ve got the flat to myself for the whole night. I’ve already messaged Tom and he’s on his way over with some food, and you guessed in more wine.

It’s good to be home Diary,

Love Y/N.

December 30th, 2011

Dear Diary,

It has become so extremely utterly apparent to me that I am utterly useless when it comes to sex and the opposite gender… Even more so than I already thought I was.

Let me tell you about last night, and how my utterly useless self realised I know nothing.

So Tom came over, and when I saw him standing at my front door with wine, take away and flowers, I swear my heart did a thousand backflips and well, diary I began to feel guilty about that kiss with George, so I did what any rational woman would do, and I practically jumped him at the door.

“I’ve missed you, Darlin’,” Tom whispered against my lips as I pulled him into the apartment, moving us back towards the settee. “Six days, too long,”

“Mhhm,” I agreed, lips still flush against his. Something took over in the back of my brain and I needed more of him as we fell onto the settee. “You’re jacket,” I began to pull it down his arms, “Take it off,”

“Y/N,” He pulled away, his full hands moving to my shoulders holding me still, “Slow down, we have all night for that,” He pulled me into his chest, “I’m beginning to think you only called me over for a booty call,”

“No,” I stuttered. “I missed you, that’s all…”

“Alright,” He conceded pulling away from me and standing, “If my girlfriend wants me to take my jacket off, then my jackets coming off.” He began to pull the fabric down his arms, stopping midway when he took in my shocked face, “Unless my girlfriend isn’t in this room?”

“You want me to be your girlfriend?” His jacket was halfway down his arms when he nodded his head.

“Yeah, I do,”

“Your girlfriend wants you to take your jacket off,” I whispered, watching as a smile broke out onto his face, the jacket falling to the floor.

“Whatever the girlfriend wants, she shall have,” He fell back onto the settee with me, a mess of limbs. “Well girlfriend,” He stroked my cheek softly, “You’re still coming to the party tomorrow aren’t you?” Tom’s New Year’s party.

“Yes, the boys and Charlotte are still right to come as well aren’t they?”

“Of course,”

“Then I will most certainly be there,” He smiled kissing me softly on the lips, “We should eat,” I whispered through another kiss, “Or we could do other things,”

“I’ve never seen your bedroom,” His hand drew over my knee in circles soothing my rapidly beating heart,

“You want to see my bedroom?” He nodded his head, “Okay,” I stumbled standing from the settee and crossing. The short distance to my small room. “It’s not very tidy, I was studying last night,” He walked inside, fingers running over nicknacks, picking up the diary Harry gave me. “Harry gave it to me for Christmas,” I missed Harry, and Dean being here without their constant football talk didn’t feel right. He smiled at it before setting it back down on the desk.

“It’s all very Y/N,”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“I’m not too sure anything about you could be bad,” He laughed laying on the bed. “Beds not too comfortable, squeaks as well,”

“Loud bed,” as George had aptly put weeks before. “Not so great when you have a bad sleep,”

“Oh really?” He raised his eyebrow,

“Wakes everyone up,” He reached his arm out towards me beckoning me to join him on the bed. I padded over and sat beside him on the hard mattress. He reached out and pulled me down beside him, laying us close together. “Hi,”

“Hi,” He breathed our noses brushing softly as he moved.

“Hi,” I whispered back. He smiled, fingers resting softly under my chin as he brought our lips together, letting them brush together softly. The kiss became rougher as Tom pulled me closer, his hands running down my arm, stopping at my waist. My heart rate spiked as Tom’s lips left mine and moved across my cheek leaving a trail of kisses from my lips to my neck, the skin of my neck being pulled deviously between his teeth. “Ugh,” A strangled moan escaped my lips as I pulled at his short hair. “Tom,” My breath was whispery, nearly unrecognisable as Tom bit into the skin again. “Fuck,”

“You okay?” He pulled his head back up, meeting mine,

“Yeah,” I pulled his lips back to mine, unable to stop the hunger I’d found for him, for the feeling of his lips on mine. He pulled me over so we spun on the small bed, I was on top of him looking down at him as my hands worked on their own to pull his shirt off. He leaned up, pulling the shirt off his body and tossing it on the ground beside my bed. His skin was toned, and nicely tanned. My fingers traced down the expanse of exposed skin as his right hand went to my hip, squeezing the skin before moving back up, fingertips tracing underneath the thin fabric off my shirt. He looked me in the eyes as he moved it upward, exposing a small part of me to him.

I felt underneath me him hardening, God, it felt a lot bigger than Julians had when we made out, and I didn’t know what to do with his, how am I supposed to know what to do with Toms… His hips slowly, subconsciously rutted up against mine hitting me in my most intimate areas.

“Y/N,” He groaned as my hips accidentally moved down against him. “Do you have anything?”

“No,” I sat upright, the cold water of his words rushing over me. “I don’t have anything,” I swung my leg off him and sat down beside him, hand resting on his bicep. I looked down to the bulge in his pants. “I’m sorry,”

“Sorry?”

“Yeah,” I moved my head so I motioned to his crouch. “About that,”

“Hey,” He sat up, putting his hands under my chin, “Don’t be sorry about anything Y/N,” He kissed me softly. “It’s fine,” He whispered. “How about we go have tea before it gets cold?”

“Yeah, Please,” He stood up and helped me up, holding my hand the entire way to the living room where the forgotten bag of food sat. “What’d you get?” I asked as I sat on the settee watching him riffle through the bags,

“Italian,” He smirked sending me a cocky wink.

And that was it Diary, Tom asked me to be his girlfriend, we made out for the first time… I mean really made out, the kind of made out where you’re sitting there, and you feel everything… everything!!! and I am now constantly worrying about how his Penis…. more so the size of it… (Which felt quite big as we already know) and how it is going to fit anywhere near (or in) me.

When Sarah told me about losing her virginity to Freddie Ashmore in tenth I assumed she was making up how painful it was, you know, the stretching, but now having felt how big Tom is, I don’t think she was lying.

Not that I’m planning on losing my virginity to Tom ANY time soon… I don’t even know if it’ll be him I lose it too, maybe he’ll end up breaking my heart and I’ll die alone an old spinster virgin lady.

I hope not,

Love Y/N,

December 31st, 2011

Dear Diary,

I’ve been Tom’s girlfriend for nearly twenty-four hours now, and it’s kind of weird… The relationship already feels more mature then the one Julian and I were in, I think it’s because we’re in Uni, and we’re practically adults… at least he is, I’d rather be an adult in training - the juice in the bottle can be wine - Last night he went home after Midnight, giving me a final kiss and a promise of seeing me tomorrow, as we enter the New Year - together.

Speaking of New Year, How crazy is it that we’re nearly in 2012… Since finishing school the year has flown by, the first year of Uni is halfway finished, and I can’t believe it.

I really lucked out meeting the people I met this year and having them to spend my first year of Uni with.

I’ll give you an update of how the party went tomorrow Diary, hopefully, the hangover isn’t too bad.

Wish me luck,

And Happy New Year Diary,

Love Y/N,

#george mackay #georgemackay #george mackay fanfic #george mackay imagine #george mackay smut #Harry Styles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles imagine #harry styles x reader

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maylovexhs · 4 years

Text

everytime - IT IS WHAT IT IS (Chp. 34)

Author’s Note: OH MY GOD. I NEVER RECIEVED SO MANY LIKES ON A CHAPTER LIKE LAST ONE’S BEFORE. SO JUST THANK YOU! I’M SO HAPPY AT LEAST ONE PERSON LIKES MY STORY. ANYWAYS, HERE’S ANOTHER ONE FOR YOU. HOPE YOU ENJOY - MAY

Catch up on everytime here

NYC. November 15th, 2019. 1 PM.

*Y/N’S POV*

“I’m one of your best friends, aren’t I?”

“Why do you ignore me for him?”

“I’m not ignoring you, H”

“Y/N”

“My friends would never act like this”

“Y/N?”

“Neither would mine”

“Hello, Earth to Y/N” I heard Ali say.

I looked up from my coffee to Ali and Izzy.

“What?” I asked Ali.

“What do you think?” Ali asked me.

Umm, what were we talking about again? Last thing I remember was just sitting down at the table in this cafe.

“Should I take the job or not?” Izzy asked me.

Oh, Izzy’s job. Right . . .

“I don’t know” I said. “That’s up to you”

Ali rolled her eyes at me.

“That doesn’t help” Ali said.

“Sorry” I said. “I just have a lot on my mind. Didn’t get much sleep”

That was true. I didn’t get much sleep. How could I when I had Harry’s and I’s last conversation on repeat on my head? He basically said I was horrible. I wasn’t horrible. Yes, I knew I was wrong for introducing to my friends so late but Ashton’s my boyfriend. Of course, Ashton met them sooner than he did. And Harry met Ali so many times already. Not to mention, all the times I’ve been on FaceTime with her and Izzy in front of him.

“What’s wrong?” Izzy asked me.

“Nothing” I said. “Just some Harry drama”

“What did he do this time?” Ali asked me. “He has a girlfriend you don’t like?”

“No, no” I shook my head at her. “Why the hell would I be mad about that?”

“You were once” Ali said.

“That was four years ago” I said.

“What happened?” Izzy asked me.

I bit my lip. How was I going to make this simple?

“Am I a bad friend?” I asked them. “Harry thinks I’m a bad friend to him”

“Why would he think that?” Izzy asked me. “You’re always so nice to us”

“He got mad that Ashton met you guys before he did” I said. “He said I was a bad friend for introducing him to you both sooner”

“Didn’t you tell me about this before?” Ali asked me.

“Am I a bad friend or not?” I asked them. “Just answer the question”

Izzy and Ali looked to each other. Izzy sat back in the chair.

“Yes and no” Ali said. “Listen, Harry does have a point. It took forever for him to meet all your close friends. Talha met you both after two months”

I sat back in my chair, crossing my arms.

“But Harry and you have always been in and out of loop” Ali said. “So, you can’t really blame yourself”

“And why would Harry still be friends with you if he thought you were a bad friend?” Izzy added. “You couldn’t be that bad to him”

I looked down, contemplating.

Izzy was right. Why would Harry still be my friend if he thought I was so bad? And why was I still friends with him if he makes me feel so guilty?

“Anyways, what do you think Izzy should do?” Ali asked me. “We helped you with your problem, help her”

I looked to Izzy. I forced myself to smile.

“Is it worth it?” I asked her. “To leave the one you have now?”

“I think so” Izzy said. “I’m worried because I don’t know how it will go. I can’t turn back to my old job if I don’t like it”

I looked to Ali and back to Izzy.

“Take it” I said. “If it is really worth it, nothing should stop you”

“That’s it?” Ali asked me. “That’s your advice?”

I nodded.

“Do you mind if I leave early?” I asked them. “I have something to check”

“You could if you want to be a bad friend to us” Ali commented.

I squinted my eyes at her. I got up from the table.

“I paid for you coffee, didn’t I?” I asked her.

“Just go” Izzy said. “We’ll see you Sunday anyways”

I smiled at Izzy.

“Mhmm” I nodded.

I took my coffee and turned from them. I walked away, taking a few steps before I heard Ali say something.

“I never understood them two” Ali said. “Harry’s so bad for her but she is still with him.”

My smile faded.

I didn’t understand either. And I wanted to know why too.

AN HOUR LATER . . .

I came back home. The first thing I did was go my bedroom and took out my box of journals.

Yes, my journals. I always had them nearby. Whenever I had a problem, I always turned to them. They helped me out a lot, actually. They helped me with when I got in a fight with Ali more than once. They helped me with my parents. Now, I hoped they helped me find the reason I was still friends with Harry.

I already knew Harry and I shared a special friendship. God knows how many times we crossed paths and had our ups and down but I always found to be asking myself why I still let Harry into my life after everything. Harry hurt me so much in the past but so have I hurt him. Maybe him more than me but my point is - why do I still stick around?

I poured my box of journals on my bed. I had about five journals. My first one was from a red journal from 2008 to 2010. My second was blue, 2010 to 2011. Third, black and from 2012 to 2014. Fourth, green, 2015-2017. And the fifth and yellow one is right next to my bed. 2018 till now. But I only cared for the black and green journals in front of me. I picked up the black journal.

I met Harry in 2013. February 2013. The day of the Brits. I met him at an after party. Let’s start there.

I opened my journal, flipping through pages until I saw Harry’s name.

February 21, 2013. Brits were last night. Didn’t win international female but that doesn’t matter. I’m still happy. (Also my therapist said I should try not base my happiness off of success) But I’m happy because I have a new friend. Harry Styles. Yes, the same Harry Styles I bumped into when I was with Dominic and the same one from one direction. That one. Funny story is, he’s Nick friend. I met Nick at an after party and Harry was there. Next thing, I know is I’m at BBC radio station having drunk conversations with Harry. Is it weird I already feel comfortable around him? Like comfortable as in I already know him? I never felt this way before except when I met Ali. Is Harry my new best friend???

I flipped three pages, seeing Harry’s name again.

April 4th, 2013. Ugh, just came back from a museum. I’m so tired but I want to write this down before I fall asleep. Harry. Rita. Tickles. Drink. Shirt Ruined. Harry’s lucky I like him and Rita’s kinda a friend so I won’t kill them. Anyways, my birthday’s in a week. I’m leaving in two days to go back home to New York. Goodnight.

I shook my head, smiling.

I remember that day. Harry was so sorry that he poured his drink on me. He said he didn’t mean it. I knew he didn’t. Rita just happened to tickle him from behind and of course, I was in front of Harry and he spilled his drink on me. Harry practically followed me into the bathroom to wash the drink off my shirt. . . Oh, Y/N. You’re going to get mad at him again.

I flipped through my journal more. I stopped at an entry from the end of 2013.

December 6, 2013. Just found out Harry’s hanging around Kendall Jenner. He told at dinner tonight. Not that I care who Harry hangs out with . . . Why should I? I’m dating Robert anyways. But I feel protective. I just feel like Harry should be hanging out with more . . . good people. People who won’t take advantage of him. . . I don’t trust Kendall. Something about her and her family irks me. According to Twitter, I’m not the only one.

I bit my lip.

A jealous me. Why did I have to land on that?

I shut my journal, putting it down and picking up my 2015-2017. I remember I was on tour for the majority of 2014. Nothing really happened between Harry and I that year. 2015, on the other hand . . .

I opened my journal and flipped through the first few pages.

March 15, 2015. I broke up with Matt. It’s wrong to keep him from his job. If you really love someone, you shouldn’t hold them back. That’s the right thing to do. But why does it feel so bad? Why does it hurt so much? It’s the right thing to do but it hurts so much it feels wrong. . . I told Harry about it. He’s the only one in LA I can trust except Lisa. His girlfriend broke up with him too. I mean, ex-girlfriend. They broke up two weeks ago so, at least I have someone who is going through the same thing as me. . . This is for the best. It has to be for the best.

I flipped to June, remembering that month so clear. It was when I realized I fell for Harry. And when he broke my heart for the first time.

June 11, 2015. I think I’m in love with him. Harry. I never thought I would be but I guess I’ve always did. The last few months just made me realize it. Harry has a strange effect on me. He knows what’s wrong the second he sees me. He knows how to calm me down. He knows how to make me feel better and happy in a way no one has before. I just feel like he gets me. I feel understood by him. Special. The last few months, I felt like shit trying to get over Matt. I did, in the end but I fell for Harry in the process too. I started to feel like I’ve felt for him a few ago actually. I didn’t actually want to believe it. I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to ruin my friendship with him over some feelings that could change. And a part of me thinks Harry could never love me back. I mean, I’m broken. My parents are shit. My friends are crazy and so am I. I have attachment issues. I can’t let anyone in and when I do, I can’t let them leave because of the pain. But my feelings for Harry didn’t change and I had to do something about that. I was fighting with myself for the last week if I should tell him and I decided, I am. I’m going to tell him when he gets his break from tour. I deserve to be happy. He makes me happy. I think I make him happy too.

I looked at the next date I wrote.

June 17, 2015. He doesn’t love me. I told him and he said he didn’t think of me like that. He said he was talking to another girl anyways. I saw the girl today. Pictures of them came out today. She’s a Victoria Secret model. . . I don’t want to talk about it.

I felt my eyes water up a bit but I quickly flipped towards September. Harry and I were not quite done. We never were.

September 16, 2015. Harry called me today. . . Yup, after two months of not talking to him, he called me. He said he was sorry and realized he had feelings for me too. He wants to give us a try. Crazy thing is that I said yes. Listen, I’ve tried forgetting Harry. I dived into work, I went out with Ali and Sophia to clubs. Still can’t get him out of my head. Maybe I was meant to wait until he realized his feelings. I just want to be happy, even if it means giving him a second chance. Who knows what it will take us . . . By the way, Ali’s pissed.

I flipped to October.

October 25, 2015. Harry broke up with me. He said as much as he tried, he couldn’t love me back. He said something was missing. I knew something was missing too. We didn’t have that passion I had with my exes. Not that I expected it’s just . . . I thought we love me back. He didn’t.

I turned to January, 2016.

January 3rd, 2016. Kendall and Harry. Harry could be with her and not me? Who the fuck did he think I was? Just a step to get fucked? Was that who I was to him? What did she have that I didn’t? Sure, she was a model and skinner and taller but I’m me. I was his best friend for the last three years. She wasn’t! I was there for Harry when his heart was broken. I’ve seen him cry. Did she? Fuck her. And Fuck Harry. This is the last straw. He can have her all he wants. He won’t have me though. Not anymore.

I looked up from the page.

I wasn’t a bad friend. If I was, Harry was worse. Harry rejected me. He made me feel like I didn’t matter. He forgot about me. What kind of friend does that? I wouldn’t . . . Why was I still here though? I forgave Harry. I forgave him a long time ago. Why did I care about what he did if I’m still his friend?

I looked down at the page. I flipped back to the June 11, 2015 entry.

I think I’m in love with him. Harry. I never thought I would be but I guess I’ve always did. The last few months just made me realize it.

I had to be over Harry. I was sure of it. I was way off happier with Felix. I am with Ashton too. But if I didn’t like, or love, Harry anymore . . . why would I be here? I’ve been through enough of his shit. So why on Earth am I still friends with him if I didn’t like him a bit? Did I love him a bit? I loved him like a best friend but like that? No, no, no. Unless . . .

I never thought I would be but I guess I’ve always did.

What if I did love Harry? Why did I love Ashton more then? Why didn’t I care what Harry would think of Ashton then? I would care for Harry more than Ashton.

I looked down at my journal again. I knew the answer.

I flipped to 2017. September 2017.

September 20, 2017. I don’t like being pregnant. I feel so emotional. . . I talked to Harry again. Well, actually I listened to Harry’s album first and then, I called him. We went out for lunch. I hate to admit it but I missed him. Hearing his voice sing made me realize it. I know we haven’t had the best relationship but . . . we have something. Something rare. We just get each other. I don’t know how to explain it. I’ve always felt something was there but I could never describe it. It’s like something has always pulled us to each other. We bring out the best, and sometimes the worst, but mostly the best in each other. . . I don’t want to lose all that for how stupid we were two years ago. Harry was twenty-one, he was supposed to not take relationships serious. I was twenty-six. I was too old chasing something that could never be. We’re different now and I’m happy with what I have now. Felix and our soon to be bundle of joy. That’s what Felix has been calling her/him. Anyways, back to the point - Harry. I’ll always want to be his friend. I loved him once and I’ll always love him. Not like that but there’s a little part of him that has my heart. Don’t all lovers do? I should tell Felix about what happened now. He invited us to his concert tomorrow and I really really don’t want to go alone.

I blinked at the page, knowing the answer all along.

Harry always had a piece of my heart. I’ve loved him and a part of me will always will. I will always be there for him, just as I have. Six years, on and off, I was always there. He was there for me too.

I grabbed a nearby pen, outlining some of the page. I carefully ripped it out and folded it. I closed my journal, putting it down on the table. I got up and looked for my little leather backbag. I did find it and put the paper inside, closing it.

I knew the answer. Harry was going to know too.

*HARRY’S POV*

I didn’t dare call Y/N today. I wanted to but I knew it was better I shouldn’t. I knew Y/N long enough to know that she needed space to calm down. I did too.

I was a dickhead. To Y/N and Ashton. It was wrong of me to tell Ashton about Felix. It was Y/N’s choice when and how she should tell him. I shouldn’t have acted so hostile towards them to begin with. I was upset with Y/N and took it out on her and Ashton. I knew I deserved to be upset at Y/N but I should have just talked to her alone about it. I didn’t and now I looked like an asshole.

KNOCK KNOCK.

I looked to my dressing room’s door.

“Come in!” I said.

The door opened, revealing Heidi.

“Hey!” Heidi said.

“Hi” I said, getting up from the couch. “Don’t I still have fifteen minutes?”

“Oh, you do” Heidi said. “Just came over to ask if you’re okay”

“Yeah” I said, smiling but a little confused. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Well, I saw you and Y/N had a little fight last night” Heidi said. “Didn’t mean to see but I was leaving and-“

“Oh, no, it’s okay” I said, lying. “We just had a little argument. We talked after, we’re fine”

We weren’t. I had no idea if we were going to be fine really. Normally, when we did get into fights, we both don’t talk for days until someone finally breaks and admits they’re sorry. Y/N always forgave me whenever I apologized. The thing now is I don’t know if she will forgive me if I did say sorry. How could she if I didn’t forgive myself either?

“You’re sure?” Heidi asked me. “Because it didn’t look like it”

“I’m one hundred percent sure we’re okay” I said to Heidi. “She said she’s coming tomorrow for the show”

“Oh, she is?” Heidi asked me.

I nodded.

“Yeah” I said. “I actually told her about-“

BRINGGG. BRINGGG.

I looked to the dressing room’s table. I watched my phone vibrate on the table. I looked back to Heidi.

“Do you mind if I-“

“Oh, take it” Heidi said. “I’ll see you in a few minutes”

I nodded at her. Heidi left, closing the door. I walked over to the table, picking up my phone.

Y/N was calling me.

I answered her call immediately. I pressed my phone to my ear.

“Hi” I said.

“Hi” I heard Y/N say in a low voice. “I thought you wouldn’t answer”

“Me?” I asked her. “Aren’t you’re the one upset at me?”

“I was . . .” Y/N said. “I wanted to talk to you about that”

“Me too” I said. “I’m sorry about last night. I didn’t mean to act like an asshole to Ashton and you. I was just angry and I should have just talked to you about it in the first place”

“No, I’m sorry” I heard Y/N say. “You’re right to be mad at me. I would be pissed off at you too if I completely ignored if you got a new girlfriend?”

“You didn’t though” I said. “I was just jealous-“

I heard a knock on my door.

“Ten minutes!” I heard one of the crew members say.

I sighed.

“Listen, Y/N. I’m sorry.” I said. “I was completely wrong. Can we talk about this later? I’m on call in a few minutes-“

“Yeah, sure” Y/N said. “I feel like we should talk about this in person anyways”

“So, your place?” I asked her. “I get off at seven. Could be there latest at eight”

“Yeah” Y/N said. “I’ll be waiting. See you soon”

“See you soon” I said.

Y/N hung up on me. I put my phone back down.

She forgave me. And in less than a week. I guess I had nothing to worry about . . . did I?

9 PM.

I walked in seeing Y/N sitting on her living room floor. Pages of papers were scattered in front of her.

“Hey” I said to her.

“Hi” Y/N said back, smiling.

“What are you on the floor for?” I asked her.

“I was writing” Y/N said. “I don’t know but I always find myself being more honest sitting on the floor”

“Were you writing about us?” I asked her.

“Something like that” Y/N said.

I smiled at her. I kicked off my shoes. I walked over and sat down on the floor next to her. I looked down at one of the pages. I picked one up, reading it.

“I won't pretend it's all your fault, when you were there through it all” I read. “I messed things up, I always do, but it was always you”

Y/N smiled at me.

“Like I said,” Y/N said. “Something like that”

I laid the paper back down on the floor.

I looked to Y/N, who was already staring at me.

“I’m sorry” Y/N said. “You were right. I’ve been a horrible friend to you. I didn’t think I would hurt you by letting Ashton meet my friends so soon. I’m sorry I forgot about you when I was with him”

I shook my head at her.

“No, no, no” I said. “I’m the horrible one here. I know you wanted me to meet your friends sooner than I did. I shouldn’t been mad at you because Ashton met them. I was just insecure and jealous of him. I thought that you would forget about me and he was going to replace me”

Y/N lightly smiled at me.

“H, he could never replace you” Y/N said. “How could he? You’ve always been there for me. No matter what happens, you will always be there. Every time we lose each other, we always find our way back.”

Y/N looked down.

“I’m not going to lie” Y/N said. “There were times I did hate you. You did horrible things and I wished I could forget you but as much as I tried to . . . I couldn’t”

Y/N picked a folded paper off from the floor. She looked to me, handing it to me.

“It’s actually funny,” Y/N said. “I found myself asking myself earlier why I was still friends with you. But I knew the answer a long time ago”

I took the paper from her. I unfolded it and started to read what was on the page.

I felt my heart jolt. That same jolt I last felt in the summer. It was back but this one felt more . . . more tender.

I looked to Y/N.

“The underlined lines are the important ones” Y/N said.

“You wrote this?” I asked her. “When you were with Felix?”

She nodded.

“You don’t have to worry about Ashton” Y/N said. “You always have a special place in my heart. You always did”

I looked at Y/N’s lips. Why did they look so tempting to kiss?

“The last thing I want is to lose you” Y/N said. “I almost did once and I think it nearly broke both of us”

I stared into her eyes. God, her eyes. Every time I looked into them, I felt safe. Home.

“Nearly?” I asked her. “Didn’t you hear my heart break in that song?”

Y/N smiled at me. She leaned into me, hugging me.

“I love you, H” Y/N said. “You’re my best friend. I can never forget you”

I wrapped my arms around her. I felt another jolt run through my heart.

“I love you too” I said.

And I don’t think it’s in that way anymore.

#hs imagine #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #hs imagines #harry styles one shot #hs one shot #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #hs fanfiction #hs fanfic #everytime chapters #everytime HS

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jaehyun-eclipsed · 3 years

Text

Before I Met You | Twenty

Next Update: ~December 29, 2020

Pairing: NCT (Jaehyun, Lucas, Mark, Jaemin, Johnny) X Reader/OC

Genre: Romance, Angst, Coming of Age

Summary: Four. There were four people before I fell in love with you… Here are their stories.

Author’s Note: Hello! Sorry I’m a few days late -- was doing some finishing touches. Also, instead of having a regular update schedule, I think I’ll be sticking with letting you know when you can expect the next update!

Before I Met You Masterlist

Prev | Next

“Where are you going?” Jia asks as soon as she sees me putting on my boots.

I glance up at her as I zip up my right boot. “Grocery store.”

“Oh… by yourself?”

I’m not sure why Jia suddenly decided to ask today who I’m going to the grocery store with. Perhaps because I went last Saturday morning, never go in consecutive weeks, and certainly never go at two o’clock in the afternoon. Or she senses that I’m sneaking around her and avoiding questions like I was with Jaemin.

“No, Johnny asked me to go with him.”

“Johnny?!” she exclaims. “Why does Johnny want to go to the grocery store with you?! He seems to want to hang out with you a lot, huh?”

“I don’t know. I mean, we just played card games and talked yesterday.”

Jia’s eyes widen. “What if he likes you?!”

I shrug.

That is a good question though. What if he does like me? Then what am I supposed to do? I would go out with him, but—

“Doesn’t he have a girlfriend?” she asks. “I saw a girl here like a month ago with him. I didn’t recognize her.”

“I don’t know. He’s never mentioned any—

Shit. No. That’s what Jaemin did. Please do not let this be a repeat of Jaemin. I don’t have time for that kind of shit again.

Jia quirks her eyebrow, wondering why I suddenly stopped midsentence. “Any… what? What are you thinking?”

“Uh, he’s never mentioned anything about it. Have you ever seen her around here after that?”

“No, I don’t think so…”

I press my lips together. “Maybe they broke up.”

“What if he does like you?!” she asks excitedly. “Would you go out with him?” I blink a few times and shrug. “I guess so.”

“So you’re from Medford? That’s cool. My family drove through there once on our way to Portland. It’s nice.”

“Yeah, I like it there. You grew up in San Jose, right?”

Johnny and I walk up the hill towards a local grocery store a few blocks north from where we live. My face feels cold from the end of fall chill, but I feel strangely happy. I’m sure it has something to do with the fact that I sort of have a crush on Johnny because I think he’s cute and we’re hanging out.

I’ve been asking him questions. Trying to figure out what he’s like. Trying to figure out whether he has a girlfriend... I know I could just be direct about it and ask, but it seems kind of random to suddenly say, “So, do you have a girlfriend?” when I barely know him.

We obviously know that we can’t just default to, “Oh, if he has a girlfriend, he wouldn’t be trying to hit on someone else” and immediately assume he has morals because apparently that’s not always true.

But aside from that issue, Johnny is nice and in the “getting to know you” stage, he’s decently interesting.

“Yeah. My parents and my sister moved to California a few months after I was born. So I lived with my grandparents in Korea until my parents came back to pick me up after settling down to bring me here,” he says.

“Do you speak Korean?”

“Yeah, but it’s not very good. I can get around though.”

“I’ve been trying to learn Korean,” I say. “I can read the alphabet and say a few phrases!”

“Oh really? I could help you out sometime.”

Johnny is a year younger than me and he has a sister that’s a year older than me that goes to school in San Francisco. His dad is often traveling for work, so Johnny doesn’t see him as often when he goes home to visit his mom every few weeks. Since she’s home by herself often, she spends a lot of her time volunteering at her church, though sometimes she’ll buy a plane ticket and meet Johnny’s dad wherever he traveled for work.

It seems… lonely.

We arrive at the grocery store and I follow him around, watching him pick out his groceries and making casual small talk about our classes, our interests, and what food to buy.

I can’t help but feel flirtatious. And that’s a weird feeling to me because I never feel flirtatious. Friendly and shy, sure. But flirtatious has only ever really occurred once and I’ll never forget that feeling. I clearly like Johnny, but I’m not trying to give it away. But he asked me to go grocery shopping so that has to count for something.

“Do you want some tea?” Johnny asks, pointing to a colorful display of canned teas.

I blink several times. “Uh, sure? I can Venmo you.”

“Nah, don’t worry about it,” he says. “Which one do you want?”

I spot my favorite flavor near the top and without saying a word, walk over to the display and get on my tippy toes in an attempt to reach the peach tea. My fingers are just a few inches shy of reaching it. Johnny chuckles and I keep my back to him to hide my frown. He walks up behind me and easily reaches over my hand to grab the can and place it in his cart.

“You could’ve just told me which one you wanted. That’s the benefit of being short with tall friends,” he teases.

“Hey! I’m not short!”

“You’re shorter than me.”

“Everyone is shorter than you!” I retort.

He chuckles again. “Yeah, that’s true. Is there anything you need? I’m done.”

I shake my head and turn to head towards the checkout line. An Oreo display case catches my eye and my expression morphs into one of disgust.

“Cherry cola Oreos?” I say in disbelief. “That sounds gross.”

“Hey, they’re probably good,” he responds, pulling out his phone.

I shrug. “I guess they had to pass the taste test before production.”

He doesn’t respond, engrossed in whatever is on his phone. My curiosity gets to the best of me and I begin peering over. He’s looking at an ad for Muji and in the top left corner are the Facebook chat bubbles. Mine is the only one on the screen and he doesn’t appear to have any other notifications. I don’t know what this would tell me. I figure if he had a girlfriend, she would message him while he was on his excursion. Actually, wouldn’t he ask her to accompany him? Unless…?

“Hey,” I greet, placing a glass of water and a plate of sliced fruit on the table. “How’s the studying going?”

Jaehyun lets out a heavy sigh. “It’s all right. A lot of terms to remember. Strategic risk, credit risk, call-options, price insurance… hard to keep them straight sometimes.”

“Do you have any flash cards? I can help test you if you want.”

He shakes his head. “That’s okay. Maybe a little later. I’m doing some practice questions now.” He looks at the plate, grabs an apple slice, and takes a bite. “Thanks.”

“You’ve taken and passed a couple exams already. I know you’ll do great on this one,” I say, taking a seat in the chair across from him.

“Yeah, but I had to take one of those exams multiple times.”

“So? You still passed. That’s all that matters. And now you’re on your way to becoming a certified financial planner! You’re doing great!”

Jaehyun smiles a bit. “I’d really like to pass this one the first time…”

“I’m sure with all the studying you’re doing, you’ll be fine. You still have a few weeks to get it down.”

“Yeah, but I have to work too…”

I chuckle lightly. “I don’t know how you do it. But you amaze me every day. Work, study, and pass these exams.”

“Honestly, I don’t really know either.” Jaehyun leans back in his chair and crosses his arms. “We should take a vacation after this.”

I clap my hands together. “Let’s go somewhere warm after I finish finals! Last vacation during law school because next semester it’s finals and then the bar exam.” I press my lips together and frown. “Tests. Always another test!”

“Are you coming in here to study?”

“Hm? Oh, I need to make a call to Siwon first. Why? Do you need something?”

Jaehyun smiles and shakes his head. “No.”

“Oh, okay,” I say as I get up from my seat. “Then I’ll—

“I just like it when you’re with me.”

I started spending more time downstairs with Chaeyoung and Shotaro. We’d sit in a comfortable silence to study and then chat over dinner. Occasionally Johnny would come down to join us. Though recently, he had been cooped up in his room trying to finish the last CS projects of the semester with Hendery. So we didn’t see each other as much, but he did message me frequently to see how I was doing and ate dinner downstairs with the rest of us.

Within a matter of weeks, classes ended and dead week was upon us. Now it was a week of intense cramming and poor diet followed by finals and then a few weeks to relax before doing it all over again. It’s like a hamster wheel… constantly running, only to find out you receive a piece of paper for your endeavors.

After finishing lunch in the dining room, I pack up my laptop and notebooks to set out for a psych review session and a few hours of library study for genetics. Johnny walks in and sits down at the neighboring table, thoughtfully watching me as I place my belongings into my bag.

“Where you going?” he finally asks.

“I have a review session for my psych class at two and then I’m going to study in the library until five or so.”

“Oh, where is it?

“In the life sciences building.”

“Oh.” He shifts around in his chair a bit and begins biting the inside of his lip. “Are you staying in the life science building after that?”

“Yeah, that’s the library I like.”

“Oh, okay. Maybe I should check it out.”

“It’s nice. It’s smaller and they usually have space.”

I glance at him, expecting him to ask to join me in the library, but when he doesn’t, I mentally shrug and throw my backpack over my shoulder.

“See you later,” I say, heading towards the door.

“Bye.”

At the review session, I scan the room and sit down next to an old dorm floormate. She doesn’t notice when I sit down, furiously texting someone with a furrowed brow.

“Ugh!” she groans.

“Everything okay?” I ask out of obligation.

“My boyfriend is being stupid.” She puts her phone back in her pocket. “I kinda think he’s cheating on me.”

I bite my lip and nod in acknowledgement. “Boys suck.”

“Tell me about it.”

I pull out my own phone to avoid any further divulgence and see a message notification.

Johnny: you said youre gonna study at the library after your review session right?

Heh. It sounds like someone’s too afraid to ask in person.

Me: Yeah

J: when does it end? can I join you? I wanna go study at the library but I don’t wanna get lost lol

My forehead creases in confusion upon reading Johnny’s reasoning. Get lost? How would you get lost?

Me: It’s over at 3 and yeah

Me: Just meet me in front of the library at 3

I’m holding back a smile. I wanted to go to the library with Johnny, but I also didn’t want to be the one to ask. To some extent, this was a test for him. To test his attraction? I like being chased just as much as the next person and if the opportunity presents itself to spend time with Johnny, then all the better.

J: ok! See u then!

An hour later, I exit the lecture hall and start walking to the other side of the building towards the library. Johnny’s tall figure is leaning against the railing in front of the entrance. He’s wearing a gray baseball cap and holding a textbook against his left thigh while using his other hand to scroll through something on his phone. I walk up to him and looks up from his phone.

“Hey!” he greets. “How was the review session?”

I shrug. “It was all right.” I gesture my head towards the library. “Ready to go in?”

He nods and I start walking into the library with him following slightly behind.

“Whoa,” he whispers, lightly grabbing onto the dangling strap of my backpack. “I’d definitely get lost in here. Make sure I don’t get lost.”

I turn my head slightly to look at him over my shoulder. Gawking at him, he smiles widely back at me. I blink at him a few times and turn back around, continuing on towards the tables in the back and pretending like I’m not leading a child with one of those backpack leashes.

Okay… maybe he’s just really, really weird.

God, this looks so stupid.

I stop in front of an empty table with two high chairs. Johnny lets go of the strap when he sees me move to take off my backpack and then follows suit. I place my belongings on the table and immediately immerse myself in reviewing for my genetics exam. I occasionally take glances over at Johnny who is diligently reading the textbook he was holding and taking notes. Normally, I’d pay a little more attention, but that’s not really my priority right now. However, I won’t deny that there’s this annoying voice in my head that’s asking, “What in the world is Johnny doing? He must like you, right? But what if he has a girlfriend that you don’t know about? Those pictures of him with that girl are still on his Instagram page, but some people leave all of those photos up even after they break up. I don’t have a gauge on what he’s like and whether he’d do that.”

Later that evening, while trying to finish a bioethics paper in bed, I receive a message from Johnny.

J: what are you doing?

Me: I’m trying to write this damn paper and it’s pissing me off

J: you want some cookies?

J: maybe it’ll help you write your paper

Me: Mm okay. I’ll be downstairs in a few

“Are you going downstairs?” Jia asks as I begin shuffling around and grabbing my backpack and a small blanket.

“Yeah.”

“Did you go to the library with Johnny earlier?”

I freeze in place and slowly turn around. How did she know about that?

“I saw you guys walking back together when I was coming back from my review session,” she continues, answering my question without her knowledge.

“Oh, yeah. He asked to meet me there.”

“Oooh!” She cracks into a wide, shit-eating grin. “He likes you! Are you meeting him downstairs too?!”

“Yeah, he said he had cookies. I want some.”

“Oh my gosh… do you like him?!”

I feel the heat rise up into my cheeks. “I mean, I think he’s cute and he’s fun to hang around with, but I don’t think I like him like that.”

“Oh yeah… if he has a girlfriend, you probably shouldn’t.” She ponders for a few seconds and her eyes shoot open. “Do you think his girlfriend knows he’s hanging out with you?!”

I mentally scoff. If Johnny is actually interested in me like that, I bet he’s conveniently left it out of any conversations with his girlfriend that he’s hanging around another girl and grabbing onto her backpack strap so that he doesn’t get “lost” in the library.

“My guess is probably not.”

I quickly leave and consider the conversation I had had with my dad earlier. I called to tell him about Johnny asking to meet at the library, grabbing onto my backpack, his various offers of cookies and what not. Basically, dad thinks that Johnny probably likes me. His opinion on the girlfriend thing? He’s not sure since we don’t know whether or not Johnny actually has one. It’s strange that she showed up once and then never again and that he’s never mentioned her. This is starting to sound eerily familiar. It’s a problem for later. I need to focus on finals for now.

There is one thing that I hadn’t realized until now though.

Jaemin hasn’t come to mind as frequently.

Perhaps I was finally getting over him.

“What’s the paper for?” Johnny asks as I set my things down at the table on his left.

“It’s for some bioethics class. I’m doing research on pesticides and lymphoma. Not exactly a happy topic.”

He pushes the cookies over to me, gesturing with his left hand for me to take some. My brow raises in curiosity when a piece of jewelry on his wrist catches my eye. It’s a thin, black band with a circular charm hanging off it. It looks like there’s something engraved on it, but I can’t tell because the backside is facing up.

“What’s the bracelet for?”

“Hm?” Johnny raises his left arm and runs his hand through his hair. “Which one?”

I raise my brow at him. “The only black one around your wrist…”

“Oh.” He lowers his hand and looks at his wrist. “Um, it’s a bracelet from my girlfriend.”

I deadpan for a few seconds before quickly remarking, “Oh. Nice!” and following with forced smile.

I turn back to my laptop, trying to pretend to read through my essay. Though, if my facial expression clearly conveys annoyance, I wouldn’t be surprised.

See! This is exactly what I meant about not being able to assume anyone has morals. Interested in Johnny, Y/N? Not anymore. Never mind.

Oh well. It’s not like I got that far with this anyway.

There’s a quick motion coming from my right and suddenly the room becomes dimmer as a baseball cap is placed on my head. I slowly turn to look at Johnny, still slightly miffed at the revelation from seconds earlier. He smiles warmly at me.

“Do you want to go to the library tomorrow?” he asks.

“Why did you do that?” I ask without answering his question.

“What?” He shrugs. “So do you want to go? We should wake up really early in the morning to go so that we can get a head start on studying!”

I nod my head. “Okay.”

What are you doing? There should be some blaring siren going off in your head, but there isn’t. Oh, that’s right. It’s because you’re still attracted to him.

I grab the hat on my head and place it back on his.

“You don’t like it?”

“It’s too big for me.”

“It’s a thinking cap. It’ll help you with your essay.”

“If only it were that easy.”

Johnny chuckles and then opens Facebook on his laptop. He has two messages: one from Hendery and another from someone with the nickname “Boo boo.” It’s times like these where I’m glad I have good control over my facial expressions and can easily type out an essay while reading over someone’s shoulder.

Boo boo’s profile picture is clearly of a girl and when Johnny opens her chat box, I see that boo boo sent a bunch of heart stickers. He follows by responding with a few hearts and a “hiii boo boo!! i love youuuuuu soooo much!!!” It goes back and forth like that a few more times.

I have to try not to gag. Is this what people are like with their boyfriends and girlfriends? Am I going to be like that? Oh gross.

Maybe I just don’t understand what love is. Who am I to question their love? However, if Johnny is “soooo in looooove” with his girlfriend, why is he acting like this with me?

If this is a repeat of Jaemin, I’m walking right into a trap.

The rest of dead week played out the same way. Wake up in the morning, go to the library with Johnny, watch Johnny send “I looovvee youuu” messages to boo boo, study in the evening with Johnny, grab a study snack with Johnny, spend time with Chaeyoung and Hendery while with Johnny.

My whole study life started revolving around Johnny. And really, it was simply having someone to spend time with. Johnny and I could sit in a comfortable silence and study for our own classes, occasionally taking breaks to eat or show each other videos. It was a good arrangement and I liked my new friend.

But the sad truth was, I liked my new friend a little too much and I had a feeling that nothing good was going to come of it.

Johnny had a girlfriend and he knew that I knew he had a girlfriend. I’ve never been interested in home wrecking and I certainly wasn’t saying anything or doing anything other than spending time with him, to indicate that I had a crush on him. But here we are a year later with the same problem: is it morally wrong for me to be spending time with this guy when I have a crush on him while fairly certain that his behavior was indicative that he liked me? Isn’t he technically emotionally cheating on his girlfriend?

I think the way I tried to justify this was by telling myself that I wasn’t the one initiating the hang outs or study sessions. Johnny would ask and I had the option of agreeing or declining. And sincerely, since I was just trying to study, I didn’t see anything wrong with it.

On the last day of finals, I joined Johnny, Chaeyoung, Jia, Shotaro, Hendery, Sungchan, and a few others in the dining room, celebrating over a box of donuts and cups of hot chocolate. We were exchanging social media accounts to keep up with each other over the break.

“Hey,” Johnny greets as he grabs the empty seat next to me. “Are you going home tomorrow?”

I shake my head. “No, the day after.”

“Do you wanna grab lunch together tomorrow? Hendery is leaving and I’m also not leaving until Sunday.”

“Oh, sure! That would be fun!”

“Cool!”

He throws his baseball cap on top of my head and suddenly the room is quiet. I can tell that everyone is looking at me. I keep my gaze down on the table and take a few seconds to respond with a laugh.

“I don’t want your hat!” I exclaim playfully, pulling it off and trying to put it back on him.

He lightly shoves my arm away. “It looks better on you.”

I ignore him and put the hat down on the table and move to grab another donut from the box, silently praying everyone will stop watching and pretend like nothing happened.

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Before I Met You Masterlist Masterlist

#nct #nct 127 #jung jaehyun #lucas wong #na jaemin #mark lee #johnny suh #wong yukhei #jaehyun #nct dream #nct u #wayv #superm #before I met you

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infinitestarsintheskye · 4 years

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The Lady and the Chauffeur Name Thing

So at the end of my LAST installment of my FS Downton Abbey AU, Christmas at the Abbey, I promised that if ONE person wanted an explanation of the many new names that popped up I would write it. Well many weeks ago now the lovely @valentinaonthemoon asked for such a list, and I am a woman of my word, even if I completely forgot about and only remembered about it just now. I’m going to pop it under a read more bc it is going to get LONG and also contain ALL OF THE SPOILERS for that series.

OKAY SO

We’ll do this in birth order I think. Nicknames are in ()

Eilidh May FitzSimmons, born December 12th 1919 - The first of the many babies!! As many of you will know if you have been following me for a while, Eilidh May was, pre-finale of course, my utter ride or die name for baby girl Fitzsimmons. I think I have like three or four fics with this particular name in it, I loved it so much. Eilidh is the Scottish variation of Helen, and means sun-ray, which ugh wouldn’t that just be so perfect for a little FitzSimmons baby. I was just utterly in love with the idea of FS giving their baby a Scottish name (as you will see in the NEXT FS baby) and the fact that this had a space/star/sun/celestial twist to it just absolutely SOLD IT for me. I should add, for all my non-scottish followers that Eilidh is pronounced Ay-Lee. I have no idea how gaelic pronunciation works, I just know how to say it. Her middle name, May, doesn’t need much explanation. I just loved the idea of them giving their little girl a middle name after someone on the team.

George (Georgie) Lincoln Campbell, born 2nd October 1921 - Okay ngl, I got real lazy with this name. Mary and Matthew’s (who Daisy and Lincoln were in the place of in this fic) son was also named George, and I liked it, I thought it would be cute if he was called Georgie, as a bit of a variation. His middle name comes from his father, obvi, who, in keeping with BOTH canons (the noise I made when I figured out I could do that I swear. I’m so sorry Lincoln it was just far too good an opportunity to pass up), I killed off on the day he was born. My apologies.

Hamish Phillip FitzSimmons, born 6th January 1922 - Oh this name. A lot of people REALLY don’t like this name, which is fine. As I said with Eilidh, I was really on a kick of giving FS babies Scottish names. I originally dismissed Hamish, and it just wouldn’t leave me alone, and just utterly grew on me. I actually went to school with a Hamish, he was a fair few years below me and he was just the tiniest, most adorable little toot! From what I can gather, Hamish is an anglicised version of Seamus or Seumus, which is the gaelic version of James, which is a very long and roundabout way of honouring Fitz’s middle name, but I still love having that connection. The middle name, Phillip, again, this name was a love of mine before this fic came about and it just seemed so natural to me that they would name their son after Coulson, and there was just no other name I liked so much with Hamish

Kathleen (Kathy) Skye FitzSimmons, born 30th May 1925 - I have no really grand explanation for this name, other than Kathleen is a special name to me, and I love using it in stories. It fit in well I thought with the 1920′s style of naming (yes I did that extensive googling) and as I say it is a very dear name to me and FitzSimmons are deserving of it. Skye, again, I’m just going through the checklist of names from the team. This was in NO WAY a narcissistic naming, I promise, I just really think they’d give their child that as a middle name, as also this was my way of slipping a lil bit of Scottish into her name too. Just a smidge :)

Hazel June Sousa, born 14th October 1926 - Oh Hazel. Hazel is just a name I really love. It is also the name of a dear friend of mine who I don’t get to see very often, and I just love it. Honestly I was just trying to find names that worked with the last name Sousa and Hazel just popped into my head. Again it works with 1920′s naming trends, (again with the googling) and yeah I just really love it. The middle name June comes from the fact that in this fic, Daisy and Sousa get married in the month of June. I thought that was a nice way of honouring their relationship, through their daughters name :)

Finley (Flint) Alphonso Mackenzie, born 28th May 1927 - So Mack and Elena adopting Flint is basically canon isn’t it??!?!? He is their son I will have no arguments. SO finding a name that Flint would work for as a nickname, bc lets be real no one was naming their child Flint in 1926, I had to find a roundabout way, was NOT EASY. I still have no idea how Flint could come from Finley, but it is close enough to make sense. By the time I got to Flint I had already named five children and was getting a bit lazy, and so his middle name is just the same as his fathers first name, which is still a very common middle name tactic.

Emily Lorna FitzSimmons, born 12th October 1927 - Again, by the time I got to poor little Emily, I had named six children already. Emily I just like. Every Emily I have ever met has honestly been the nicest and sweetest person I have ever known. It has a good track record for me and it just sounds so nice with Fitzsimmons. Lorna, Lorna comes from my own personal headcanon for Fitz’s mum’s name, and so I think that’s where Lorna comes from, as a way of honouring Fitz’s mum. It is also believed to derive from the name of the Scottish town Lorne, so snuck another bit of Scotland into baby FitzSimmons’s name :)

Arthur (Archie) James FitzSimmons, born 14th August 1929 - If you all cast your minds back, at the very start of the Lady and the Chauffeur, I named Jemma’s dad, Lord Shieldshire, Arthur Simmons. So this was my way of honouring dear old Donk, but they call him Archie, just so he’s his own wee man. James, again, got a bit lazy, same middle name as Fitz. Also v Scottish name, we are 5/5 for Scottish baby FitzSimmons :)

Eve Margaret Sousa, born December 24th 1929 - Eve, well, she was born on Christmas Eve. I cast around for ages trying to find Christmasy names. She was Robyn for a little while, I considered Noel, but that felt a little too contemporary, so she was Eve! And yes, Margaret is my little wink to Agent Carter. I couldn’t help myself.

Violet Faith Mackenzie, born 6th April 1930 - I actually had a lot of fun finding this name. I briefly considered calling her Hope, but no, that felt a little too on the nose for me. The name Violet comes from obviously the little purple flower, but the flower itself means hope, which I liked. Out of the three surnames, I feel like Mackenzie is the easiest out of all of them to find names for, (maybe it’s because I’m Scottish and know a fair few people with that Mac/Mc sound at the start of their surname) and I played around with a few possibilities, but honestly I just fell in love with Violet. Faith comes from the fact that faith is very important to both Mack and Elena and I wanted to consider that and honour that in the naming of their little girl.

Edward (Teddy) Donald FitzSimmons, born December 1st 1932 - The last (for real this time) little FitzSimmons baby of this verse. Blame Fitz being forever broody and Jemma just loving their babies so much, and also being an easy burst when it comes to Fitz and their babies. This name, boy oh boy, this name was HARD. Girls names for FitzSimmons babies, for some reason, easy as pie for me, I have a list as long as my arm of girls names I love for them. As for boys names, Hamish is the only one that has really stuck long term for me. All of the names I found for this poor wee boy that I liked were just a bit too modern, so I had to go searching again. I saw Edward, realised it could be shortened to Teddy and fell in LOVE. Only in this verse would I really get away with calling a baby Teddy so I took the chance and ran with it, and now little dark haired blue eyed Teddy FitzSimmons runs around rent free in my brain. His middle name, is not really obvious why I chose it at first glance. Again I struggled. I couldn’t really find any more Scottish names that I liked, or at least ones that i could give poor Simmons a fighting chance of pronouncing properly (Lachlan is still on my list and I have NEVER heard anyone not Scottish pronounce that first syllable properly). So Scottish was out, and so I went to my next mainstain of family names. And Deke or Enoch were the only two male names I hadn’t touched. Enoch was going to be impossible to find a link (trust me I tried) but DEKE, comes from a common nickname for Donald. So Donald he was.

I hope you enjoyed this little (haha) list! I just love putting thought and meaning into names, and this kind of gives you a little glimpse into my naming process. Yes I know I will be a nightmare if I ever have children. That is a whole SEPARATE and ever changing and evolving list.

#skye rambles #fitzsimmons #skye writes #the lady and the chauffeur #Christmas at the Abbey #tlatc #cata

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hallucinosims · 4 years

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You know how people are like “Here’s my editing progress through the years” and stuff me included i wanna see ya’ll worst editing decisions through the years when you thought they were bumpin. Here’s mine. Can i tag people in this? I want this to be a tag anyway i tag @liliithvatore @softpine @sadb0ysims and @cheesehair Update because I also want to tag @literalite I don’t know if i know you like that to tag you in anything but here i am doing it anyway

Reagan in the hallway, June 2018

Who did i think i was? Light from the window and hair strands done with a mouse horrendous never again I’m sorry ya’ll had to see this in retrospect (5/10) Not the worse but not the best

Jack’s funeral, also June of 2018 cause i was speedrunning when i first started. Maybe july idk

Not nearly as bad but that’s now how depth of field works and it was just super brown for some reason. Also before i decided on Marion’s hair length (2/10) not bad at all i’ll let her live

Kassidy dancing I’m pretty sure this is August 2018

After I started doing the cinematic bars so it’s pretty good. Now this isn’t bad at all HOWEVER THIS STYLE OF EDITING DOESN’T WORK IN ANYTHING OTHER THAN NATURAL LIGHT HOLY SHIT THE REST OF THIS SET WAS ORANGE (1/10)

The gang on the balcony i defenitly want to say it’s summer 2018 maybe late august because i remember editing this at the atrium at Lincoln center

By this point i knew better which is why it makes me so angry. I had just learned about adding that sweet sweet crunch that all the simblrs use it’s a photoshop extension i don’t remember the name i still have it but i don’t use it anymore (3/10) holy shit they are so crunchy and the lighting is weirdly flat but i liked the look for maybe a week

The night Maren ran away I think this is October 2018

I had just changed my editing style again and like many others i’ve done, looks good in the light but a bit shit in the dark. Not bad, but i do wish i knew how to edit better because none of the originals of this era exist anymore which means i have to retcon this weird gray pink editing everything there’s a flashback also no good cc yet (6/10)

This christmas post I know for a fact this was October of 2018 because that’s when i started getting traction because of the Dorian/Reid not really sex but technically sex scene that also happened to get nuked in the tumblr’s nipplegate that December

Yes bitch give us NOTHING. I was like “Oh sims lighting mods look good enough let me hit that up with some Gaussian blur and levels and we’re good) the fact that i tried to make a pose for this DOESN’T HELP (6/10)

No such thing as love flashback November 2018

This shit enrages me honestly because I stand by these ones looking nice AND THEN I NEVER BOTHERED TO EDIT THE REST OF MY STORY POSTS LIKE THAT I’M (2/10 not bad just bitter)

Reagan’s vision late december 2018

Fun fact about this i stole those trails from the Billie Eilish music video because the ones i drew turned out a bit shit (3/10)

I kinda got my footing then went AWOL what is this January 2019?

WHY IS IT CRUNCHY? WHY DID I DECIDE TO DRAW THE SNAPCHAT STUFF? I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU WE WERE ALL ROOTING FOR YOU (7/10 because it was going so well and i was like this could use some crunch and diy)

I forgot when this was but uh... Lilith and Caleb fight

There was a huge clip where the glass roof would come through so i was clone stamped it out and was like “ooh bitch she seamless” HA no she aint (5/10)

The party def the summer of 2019 because again at the atrium in lincoln center

I hated how this sequence looked especially after following Rowan’s acid trip this shit turned out gray i hate it here (10/10 no i’m not over reacting because the posts surrounding it looked so FUCKING PRETTY)

I don’t remember when this was but uh... right after west side story technically Summer? I think??

Eyes... that’s it that’s really it. I know how to draw them now but... i rebuke these(9/10)

And finally since i haven’t really changed my editing style in the last several months aside from the shadows so really the only things left are flares so uh...

HOHMYGOD THE BLOODIN THE CALEB FLASHBACK SCENE I EDITED THESE IN AUGUST AND DIDN’T POST THEM UNTIL OCTOBER 2019

THAT BLOOD LOOKS SO BAD HOLY SHIT I’M DOING EVERYTHING IN MY POWER NOT TO GO BACK AND FIX IT BUT UGH (10/10 ugly shit for an important scene)

#a bitch really thought she was doin something in some of these #nonsims #saviorhide #hall posts #also this is me procrastinating on going in game for the tribes post and the next story post #i have well over 600 story post sets so that's why this is so long i'm sorry #this also doesn't even include my other simblr attempts in fact this doesn't even include atmt #ya'll don't need to rate yours i just wanted to i've been watching too much tiktok

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