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megalony · 2 days

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Better Than Any Medal

As promised, this is finally a buddie fic. Evan Buckley x reader x Eddie Diaz. I'm sorry it's taken so long to do a Buddie fic, I hope you will all like it.

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Evan Buckley Masterlist

Eddie Diaz Masterlist

Summary: While at the award ceremony with Buck, Eddie and their kids, (Y/n) starts having contractions. But she tries not to tell the boys, wanting to celebrate first.

Enjoy.

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(Y/n) arched her lower back, trying to relieve the pain in her spine that felt like it was snapping in three different places, all at once.

Tears welled up in the corners of her eyes and she couldn't stop them from falling down her face as her nails started to scratch against the porcelean sink. A twinge rolled through her back and her knees bent forward into the sink that she was leaning heavily against to the point she felt like she was going to break it.

One hand moved up to swipe at the sweat glistening on her skin and she took a deep breath, trying to push through the pain.

They all had a busy day today. Today was a special day and (Y/n) didn't need this pain right now. She needed to push through it and get ready so none of them were late for the station. This was going to be the first medal Evan would be awarded, and Eddie's first medal for being a firefighter and it would be the only medal Eddie would be proud of.

God knows he hadn't been happy when he got his medal for his time in the army, that was one he didn't think he deserved. But getting a medal for going against regulations and orders to go and save Bobby, that was something worth celebrating.

She tried to straighten up but once she was stood up, it felt like her stomach dropped down and tried to weigh her down to the floor.

"Mum," Violet knocked on the door, followed by a giggle that almost lifted (Y/n)'s heart. She knew all the kids were getting impatient because they were all excited to go to the station. They were just like their dads; always up for a party no matter what they were celebrating.

"I'm coming, just- hang on."

Her legs quivered when she slowly eased down to sit on the toilet so she could get dressed without falling over. She kicked the lounge set she had stole from Eddie this morning to one side. The shorts had been a little uncomfy because they didn't stretch properly over her stomach anymore, but there was very little that still fit (Y/n) these days.

She reached out for her tights and leaned forward, rolling her eyes to herself as she wriggled her feet into her tights. This was the part (Y/n) didn't like about being pregnant. Where she could barely get dressed or walk about without her stomach getting in the way or dragging her down or making her feel uncomfortable.

She stood up and leaned her hip into the sink, letting the waistband bunch just under her stomach because she couldn't be bothered to fight with them any more. She had to finish getting ready.

They didn't feel as comfy as they used to, but most things didn't anymore. (Y/n) was used to living in the boy's clothing, but she couldn't exactly do that today on a special occasion.

She had asked the boys why they couldn't have had this ceremony next month when (Y/n) would have already gone into labour. They had waited three months since the rescue mission to actually award the team, another month wouldn't have mattered. But they chose today when (Y/n) was thirty-five weeks pregnant so she would have to sit uncomfortably through the day and wear something that wasn't flattering in her current state.

Tears welled up in her eyes again when she shuffled towards the door and felt the baby start to kick. That was all she needed, for the baby to move and kick and liven up so (Y/n) would feel worse.

Her hand curled around the handle but she froze when a tightening sensation in her abdomen had her leaning forward and sent her knees buckling.

Oh no.

"Please… please, not today." She muttered defeatedly to herself as her hand moved to hold her stomach like she was trying to get the baby- or her body- to listen to her pleas.

She couldn't go into labour today. This was not the day to have their fourth kid. Not when today was supposed to be about Eddie and Evan and a day to celebrate the pair of them. (Y/n) wasn't supposed to go into labour today and take the attention off the boys or drag them all away from the party and cause a fuss.

The back pain, the sleepless night last night, the constant uncomfortableness she felt and the twinges rolling through her stomach, they were all vaguely familiar to when she had the girls. Why today? Why now? Why now, when this was supposed to be a happy day without stress or drama or any sort of problems arrising.

(Y/n) had done this twice before, she knew the signs and the feeling of going into labour and that definitely felt like a contraction.

If this was the start of labour, maybe (Y/n) could get through the whole day without much fuss or pain. Maybe she could hold off telling the boys until later this afternoon, maybe this evening if she was really lucky. That's what she would do, she would try her best to keep this under control and wait until strictly necessary to tell the boys.

She took a deep breath and straightened up, more and more convinced that she was going to have this baby today when the pain started to fade.

When she finally opened the bathroom door, Violet grinned up at her and muttered a quiet 'yay' although she leaned her head to the side when she realised her mum wasn't even dressed yet.

"Mum, papa said we're going in five minutes."

Evan was a stickler for timing. He created schedules for their days out, he prepped and got the kids up early and got breakfast ready. He was always creating routines and time guidlines to keep everyone on time, he couldn't bear to be late for anything.

"And I'll be ready, I just need my dress." (Y/n) leaned down and kissed the top of Violet's head, managing a smile when she looked at what her daughter was wearing.

A dark plum purple dress that fanned out in ruffles around her legs and a matching purple flower clip in her hair.

The six year old nodded and gave (Y/n) a hug before she wriggled past and hurried into the bathroom.

(Y/n)'s hand pressed against the wall, using it as leverage to get herself further down the hall towards the bedroom. She had only just got up and already she wanted to sit back down again. She just wanted to sit down and try to get the pains to disappear. All night she had been uncomfortable, unable to find a good position to lay in without her stomach hurting her her back aching like it had been broken. And now if contractions were happening, the uncomfortableness was going to get a lot worse.

Something soft formed on her lips when she headed into the bedroom and looked over at Eddie.

He was stood in front of the mirror, buckling up his belt and tucking his dress shirt into his high-waisted trousers that fit snugly over his hips.

It wasn't often that (Y/n) got to see either of her men in their suits, the most she got was them in their day to day uniform. Seeing Eddie stood there with the matching trousers and blazer and a tie was so strange, Eddie didn't usually dress up in suits unless it was a formal event like a wedding. For events and family gatherings he usually wore some smart trousers and a button up shirt, nothing this fancy.

But all five of them had to wear their uniforms today because this was a formal HQ event and they were having photos taken. The ceremony was technically for PR and promotional reasons, but it was still good that they were all getting recognition for what they had done.

Eddie's head turned in her direction and he quirked a brow as he looked her up and down. Stood there near the bed in her tights and her bra with most of her stomach exposed for his flooded eyes to drink in and observe.

"Are you going like that?" He danced his eyes up and down her frame while he turned away from the mirror to face her instead.

"I'm sure you'd love that, but no, I'll find a dress."

She looked in the walk-in wardrobe for a dress that would look half decent on her but not make her look like a fool or a football. Her eyes locked on a dark cherry red dress and she swiped it from the hook, smothering a groan as she clicked her spine into place, again, and dragged it over her head.

Her lips formed a frown when she pulled the dress down to her knees and it pulled a bit too low on her chest and revealed her bra.

She sucked in a deep breath and shimmied the heart neckline back up to cover her chest, but it pulled the waistband higher over her bump and made the dress ride up her thighs.

Her teeth bit down on her lower lip to stop herself from crying as she tried to rearrange the dress once again. She didn't want it too high up her thighs or too low on her chest, but there didn't seem to be any middleground.

It seemed safer to show a bit more chest and cleavage than risk her dress being too high around her thighs. She made sure her bra wasn't on show and she looked as decent as possible, but she barely made it out of the wardrobe before arms circled around her waist.

"I like that one, you look lovely." Eddie murmured, punctuating his words with a kiss against her shoulder and travelling his lips up to the side of her neck.

He slid his hands beneath her dress, raking it up so his fingers could glide across her stomach and over her tights. His words made (Y/n) smile but she didn't quite believe him. She didn't feel like she looked that nice when her tights barely stayed up, her dresses didn't look right on her anymore and even Eddie's clothes were starting to become too small for her.

"Hm, I don't think so."

"Why not?"

The genuine disappointment in Eddie's voice had (Y/n) shivering and she leaned her head back on his shoulder, pressing her forehead against his neck. She felt him lean his cheek on top of her head while his elbows pressed into her waist so his arms could squeeze her lovingly into his chest.

"If my stomach gets any bigger I'll be flashing my chest or my thighs to everyone. Nothing will fit anymore." Her hands travelled down to hold Eddie's wrists and she lifted her head from his shoulder when Eddie leaned forward into her.

He moved his pointed chin across her shoulder so he could pepper kisses across the front of her neck, feeling each shallow breath she took.

"Then I guess you'll just have to live in our gym stuff until boy gets here." He punctuated each word with a kiss up and down her neck before he lifted his chin and connected their lips.

Both Eddie and Evan's gym gear was more stretchy and loose than the rest of their clothing and his words made (Y/n) smile. When the kids weren't home she often wore the boy's shorts and a bra if the weather was warm enough and she knew if drove them both mad.

Although, if this was (Y/n) going into labour, she wouldn't have to worry about clothes not fitting anymore. This would be her last day worrying about how much her stomach was going to grow. Her shape would start changing again in the next few weeks, but at least she wasn't going to get any bigger than this.

They broke apart when they both heard Evan shouting "Are we ready?" to get all their attentions.

(Y/n) was as ready as she could be. She felt Eddie press another lasting kiss to the side of her neck before he unravelled from her frame and let her dress drop back down around her thighs.

(Y/n) pushed forward and headed out of the room, trailing her hand along the wall again when her stomach twisted and shivers ran down the back of her legs. She had a feeling once she was sat down at the station, it was going to be hard for her to get back up again.

Her eyes locked with Evan's when she headed into the hall where he was stood with all the kids. Violet was jumping up and down, waiting eagerly to go get in the car, Chris was stood with a broad smile in his suit that made him match both his dads. And Poppy was in a dark red dress similar to (Y/n)'s, with white flower petals sewn into the hem and a red scrunchie in her hair. The two year old was as eager as Evan to get going.

"Do you think I look okay?" (Y/n) glanced down at her dress before she looked up at Evan who was suddenly in front of her with wide eyes full of hunger.

"You look beautiful." His hands found her sides and he reeled her in until her stomach was pressing into his abdomen and her hands found his shoulders.

Her head tilted to one side and she watched with a quickening heartbeat as Evan's eyes clouded over. One hand reached up to drag her fingertips over the light coat of stubble on his chin, wondering if he was trying to grow it out like Eddie. Evan wasn't usually one for stubble or a beard, he liked to be clean shaven, especially since the one time he had stubble a few years ago, Violet had cried and demanded he shave and 'be papa again'. But he looked good with it today.

Her weight shifted from foot to foot but she tightened her hand on his shoulder, trying not to make a sound when her stomach twinged. It didn't feel like a contraction, but it felt like something similar. Like her body was starting to get ready for what was about to happen soon. She couldn't help the way her knees bent forward and she leaned into Evan a little.

It was enough to grab his attention and cause a frown to paint across his face. His head tilted to one side and his hands gripped her hips while his eyes raked up and down, trying not to focus on her cleavage too much so he could try and see what the problem was.

"You okay?"

"J-just a twinge… I think someone's awake." She felt Evan's hands leave her hips so he could cup her stomach instead and his lips curved into a catfish grin that morphed when he pecked her temple.

"Are we going now?" Chris swayed back and forth and banged his crutches to try and gain everyone's attention when he noticed his dad walking down the hall.

Evan's lips curved into a wide smirk when he felt a kick beneath his palm and it only brightened his already ecstatic mood. He pressed a few more butterfly kisses against her temple and cheeks, running his fingertips across her hips before he leaned back and turned to face the kids.

(Y/n) curled both her hands around Evan's bicep and leaned into him while she felt Eddie's hand on her lower back.

"Two cars or one?" Eddie mumbled and reached down to scoop Poppy up so the toddler didn't try and run once the front door was open.

They had the choice of taking both cars down to the station or one of them driving the 'bus' as the kids called it. Which was just the seven-seater they had so if they wanted to go on days out, they didn't have to take two separate cars and split up.

"I'll drive the bus, come on let's hop to it." Evan circled the keys around his finger and opened the door, letting Chris take the lead and Violet take his hand as they headed out.

***

"Can we join you?" (Y/n) smiled shyly and looked over at the girl she classed as a sister.

A smile lit up Maddie's face and she nodded, waving at the seats when she saw her family standing by her table.

Everyone was filtering around the station, finding a table to sit at to wait for the ceremony to begin. And (Y/n) thought sitting with Maddie and Jee might be a good idea, especially since they would be close to the stage and all the kids would be able to see the boys easily from here.

She felt Eddie's hand on her shoulder as she slowly sat down next to Maddie and he stood behind her chair and kissed the back of her head. While Chris sat down next to her and Violet sat opposite (Y/n) so she could be next to Jee.

Violet was the eldest girl, being six, Jee was in the middle since she was almost four, and then Poppy was the youngest since she was two. But the three of them got along like a house on fire and were always wanting to be together and go out with each other.

"Okay baby, are you gonna sit with mummy while we go over there?" Evan bounced Poppy on his hip and moved her towards (Y/n), but he rolled his eyes when she tightened her arms around his neck and started to wriggle around.

She squirmed and whined, muttering no as she tried to glue herself against him to stop him from putting her down.

"You can't come up on stage with us, girlie." He pecked her temple before he sat her on (Y/n)'s lap.

As much as Evan wanted to stand up on stage with all the kids stood by their side, they couldn't exactly do that. But he didn't want Poppy to get upset or have a temper tantrum either. She was as clingy as she was cute and she didn't like being parted from any of her three parents.

She wriggled around on (Y/n)'s lap, whining and holding her arms out while her bottom lip wobbled, something that always made Evan give in and crumble like a cookie. But he didn't get chance to try and reach out to kiss her or try and bargain with her before Eddie leaned over and held her hands.

"You stay with mum and be good, and you might get to wear papa's medal, okay?" It seemed enough of a bribe to stop Poppy from having a mini meltdown and she nodded, managing a smile when Eddie kissed her cheek.

Evan murmured a quiet "Be good," to them all and gave Maddie's shoulder a squeeze before he and Eddie made their way over to the stage to stand with the others.

(Y/n) watched them both saunter off and it made her smile when Evan hid himself away on the back row like he was trying to blend in and make sure he didn't stand out. Tommy was the tallest, but Evan came in at a close second and he didn't want to stand at the front and block the other's views.

She let her eyes wander around the station for a minute while her arms tightened around Poppy and she kissed the top of her head. The ambulance and both trucks had been parked round the back so there was enough space for a party in here. And two other nearby stations were on standby so all calls could be redirected to them. Allowing the 118 to have the whole day off to celebrate without the risk of a callout getting in the way and disrupting everything.

When Poppy wriggled and stretched her arms out, a soft smile overtook Maddie's face and caused her eyes to crease.

"Aww, you wanna sit with me, honey?" She opened her arms and gladly let the toddler clamber from (Y/n)'s lap and onto her own. She wrapped her arms around Poppy and snuggled her close to her chest and pressed a sloppy kiss to her cheek.

(Y/n) smiled at the sight and looked across at the rest of the kids, noting that Jee and Violet were more than happy chatting away about something in hushed whispers. And Chris was grinning from ear to ear, his eyes set on both dads, just waiting for the speeches to start so he could begin clapping.

She twisted in her seat, moving so her back was straight against the chair and she was turned towards the left so she could face the stage and watch the boys.

But a twinge glimmered across her face when another contraction tore through her stomach. Her hand moved down to smooth circles into the lower part of her stomach but when the pain disappeared, she let out a shallow breath.

When the pain wore off, (Y/n) continued smoothing her hand along the side of her stomach and she slouched a little in her chair. A forced smile played on her lips so the boys didn't suspect anything was wrong.

At least this was still the early stages right now. They could get through the ceremony and the pleasantries and (Y/n) could try and last as long as possible before needing to tell the boys what was happening and cause some panic.

A sudden thought flashed through her mind and had her taking a sharp breath.

Her water best not break yet.

If her waters broke too soon she wouldn't be able to pass it off or stop anyone from knowing she was in labour. But if it held off, (Y/n) could breeze through the contractions like she had been doing for the last hour or so. She could push them aside and try to carry on with the celebrations. When she had Violet it had taken a long time for her waters to actually break, she got down to eight minutes between contractions before her waters broke.

With Poppy she barely went into labour an hour before her water broke and everything seemed to move swiftly.

"So, how are you?" Maddie turned Poppy around on her lap so both of them were facing the stage, but she looked to the left to smile at (Y/n) who broke out of her trance and came back to reality.

"Tired." (Y/n) smiled and leaned back a little more, slouching down so her back didn't hurt as much and she darted to look over at the clock on the far wall. She hadn't been keeping track of the timing. She needed to count the minutes between each contraction so she knew if she was close to having the baby or not.

Maddie and Chimney had seen first-hand how ill (Y/n) had been at the start of this pregnancy.

(Y/n) had been in and out of hospital with severe morning sickness in the beginning. Evan had come off a twelve hour night shift and then spent the next twenty four hours in hospital after he came home and found (Y/n) passed out in the bathroom, dehydrated after throwing up everything she had in her.

It took a while for the morning sickness to taper off, and it didn't help when she already had three other kids to look after. Which was one of the reasons Maddie had been round to their house so much, so she could try and help look after the kids and give (Y/n) a break.

It felt like the least she could do because when Jee was born and Maddie had been struggling, (Y/n) had stepped in to look after her niece. After Maddie took time to go and take care of herself, (Y/n) had Jee almost every other day to give Chimney a break and to help as much as she could.

"Well you look lovely, by the way. I love the dress." Maddie took a sip of her drink and reclined in her seat while she looked up and down the dress approvingly. The colour was lovely and it stood out well without making her look rounded or out of shape with her pregnancy.

"Thank you."

(Y/n) was used to the boys constantly telling her they thought she looked lovely, but that was different. They were her partners. They always thought she looked good, especially when she was pregnant. Hearing from someone else that she looked lovely boosted (Y/n)'s confidence.

Her figure had just started to change after having Poppy and now she was pregnant again, changing shape for a third time.

She smiled up at the boys on stage.

Eddie looked stoic. His face was calm and his lips were curved into a tender, blushing smile. Whereas Evan looked a mix between excited and nervous, trying to dampen down his smile so it didn't shine too brightly and show off how childlike he felt right now.

(Y/n) couldn't wait to see what the pictures would look like once they were uploaded in a few days. She wanted all the pictures she could get of the boys and the team as a whole.

Her spine clicked into place and she sat up straighter once it was time for them all to be awarded their medals.

Eddie looked almost pleased to get off stage and he managed to smile when the medal was hung around his neck. It made (Y/n) wonder just how long the boys would keep them on before they either put the medals in (Y/n)'s bag or pawned them off on the kids. It would be Eddie who would give his away first, (Y/n) knew that. Evan would be a bit more apprehensive to part with his medal.

The dark rouge blush that flushed Evan's face when it was his turn made (Y/n) smile. He looked so sweet with his nose and cheeks tainted pink and his neck flushed red and his smile reached those baby blue eyes.

She could see his hands fidgeting in front of his lap, scratching together to remain calm and composed until he could move to the back of the stage again and blend into the background. Not that he could ever blend in when in (Y/n)'s eyes, both her men always stood out.

As soon as the clapping started and everyone began to move, (Y/n) could hear all the kids cheering and bouoncing up and down like rockets about to take off into the sky.

It made her smile, but her smile faded when another contraction stabbed at her abdomen and had her leaning forwards. Her hand gripped the edge of the table and she took a sharp breath, pressing her lips into a thin line to muffle any sound and try to cover up her unease.

"You okay?"

She felt Maddie's hand on her wrist and she forced herself to nod and try to laugh. If Maddie knew she was having contractions, she would tell the boys straight away and then none of them would be staying for much longer.

(Y/n) didn't want to disrupt the ceremony in any way, she wanted today to go well and the boys and the kids to enjoy themselves. She wanted the boys to get the recognition they deserved and have a relaxed day with their colleagues where they didn't have to rush into dangerous situations.

Both the boys loved a party and (Y/n) wasn't going to tell them and ruin the atmosphere until it was absolutely necessary.

"Just back ache, God this boy's killing my spine." She wasn't exactly lying, her back did hurt a lot more than usual. Only last week her back had locked in place and Eddie had to sit on the kitchen floor with her for over half an hour until he could finally move her and stand her up without crippling her in agony.

She tried to sit back up straight and when she looked over at the boys, she grinned and looked around the table.

"Why don't you all go get a picture with dad and papa?"

Poppy was off like a shot, squirming out of Maddie's arms and squealing with her arms stretched out in front of her. She looked cute, like a little berry in her red dress, weaving between everyone who quickly moved out of her path so she could make a beeline for her dads.

She reached Eddie first who grinned and scooped her up, planting a kiss down on her cheek as he swung her round in the air before settling her down on his chest.

Chris and Violet followed swiftly after and Evan picked Violet up while Chris stood between them both. The five of them got a few lovely pictures together that (Y/n) would make sure she got printed and put in a frame at home.

Tilting her head down, (Y/n) looked down at her stomach while her lips pressed together tightly and her hand curled around the edge of the table. The sharp edge cut into her palm and she held her breath until her chest felt like it was going to explode, making sure she didn't make a sound at the familiar tearing feeling in her abdomen.

She almost jumped in her seat when she felt a pair of hands on her shoulders and a set of lips smothering the top of her head.

"Wanna come get something to eat, baby?" Evan's hands moved up and down (Y/n)'s arms as he leaned over the back of her chair and attached his lips to the side of her neck.

"No, m'not hungry." Her hand reached up to hold Evan's wrist and she gave a tight squeeze while her head leaned into the crook of his neck. She couldn't go and get something to eat, not when her stomach was churning and the contractions were starting to tear her in two.

"You and bubba aren't hungry? I find that hard to believe." Evan let go of her shoulders so he could curve his arms around her front and glue his chest into her back.

He couldn't well believe that (Y/n) didn't want anything to eat when she knew Bobby had helped make half the food on that buffet table. She and the kids were all suckers for Bobby's food, especially when she was pregnant. Evan was always delighted at the strange cravings (Y/n) had when she was pregnant and he loved that she actually had a proper appetite when she was pregnant- at least after the morning sickness wore off with this pregnancy.

"Not yet anyway," (Y/n) murmured back before she pecked Evan's cheek and clicked her spine into place.

"You'd better be quick, there won't be much left soon."

"Not with you and the kids nearby." A grin spread across (Y/n)'s lips when Evan swatted his hand down on her hip. "I'll come up and get a drink." She patted his arm before her hands moved to the table to try and ease herself up.

She felt Evan's hands shift to her hips and once she was up, he pecked her cheek and kept an arm curved around her waist as they headed over to the buffet table. Evan eventually unravelled his arm from (Y/n)'s waist so he could reach over and pass Chris and Violet a plate each.

He stood behind Eddie and rested his chin on Eddie's shoulder so he could kiss his neck, nudging his shirt collar out the way.

A shiver tore down Eddie's spine and he gruffed, trying not to move or make a noise when he felt Evan nipping at the side of his neck. He rose a brow and twisted his head to the right to look at his partner who was grinning into his neck.

"Don't mark me up." He kept his voice quiet so Poppy wouldn't take any notice since the toddler was sat on his hip, currently refusing to let him go.

Evan grinned and finally pulled away once a red slash appeared on Eddie's neck that he tried to cover with the collar of his shirt. He moved his free hand down to Violet's shoulder and let her stand in front of him while Chris stood between him and Eddie, all of them adding to their paper plates.

Eddie led the way back to the table with Chris following behind him while Evan stayed with Violet and pointed out the stuff she would eat. She was a fussy eater, most of the stuff on the table she wouldn't even try. Whereas Chris was like both his dads and ate anything, and Poppy would just pick and choose things from Eddie's plate.

Just as Evan was about to guide Violet back towards the table, he stopped when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Uh, Buck?" Chimney let go of Evan's arm and reached to his right, daring to rest his hand on (Y/n)'s arm when she looked like she was about to collapse.

She was holding a pitcher of juice with a stack of paper cups in front of her, both of which she was about to take back to the table. But she stopped and leaned forward, her free hand pressed down onto the table that she prayed would take her weight and keep her stood upright.

Chimney could feel her shaking and she had her chin tilted down into her chest and her eyes were snapped closed. She wasn't saying anything but he would take a guess that she was in some sort of pain.

"Baby, what's wrong?" Evan let go of Violet's shoulder and gently nudged her to follow after Eddie before he moved to stand behind (Y/n).

"M-my back…"

A frown formed on his lips and he leaned over her while his right hand gently pressed into her lower back. A cringe tore through Evan and his lips formed a grimace when a loud click echoed through the air and he felt the crunch beneath his palm. Her spine had clicked into place.

(Y/n) let out a small sigh and finally opened her eyes, shuddering through her next breath, disguising the contraction with the back pain she was having. At least her back felt a little more flexible now Evan had unintentionally put it back in place.

"Thanks," She tried to smile up at Evan but it didn't make him feel any better, the concern was still plastered across his face.

"Let's sit you down, that didn't sound too good."

(Y/n) was inclined to agree, she wasn't sure how much longer they would be staying here if the contractions continued this strongly.

***

Closing her eyes, (Y/n) leaned forward until her head was hung over the table and her knees were pulled up against the underside of the tabletop. Her hand moved to jab into the side of her stomach, pressing as hard as she could to try and deflect the pain and distract herself.

Her teeth sank down in her lower lip so sharply blood started to well up on her tongue and flood her mouth.

The contractions were as strong as ever and they were starting to get closer together. She couldn't wait this out much longer. She was going to have to tell the boys and ruin the party, but they were having so much fun.

All the kids were in their element, drifting around to talk to everyone else and get pictures and cake and play games. Chris had been having a great time with Denny and chatting to Hen and the girls were all playing together and Poppy was being passed around like a present for everyone to admire. She had taken a shine to Bobby who had spent almost half an hour walking around the station with her, talking to people and showing her around.

A quiet whimper tumbled past her lips and her body started to shake as her knees juttered against the table that was empty, apart from herself.

Once the pain started to subside, (Y/n) tried to sit up straight in her chair but her lower back felt like it had been broken and her abdomen was on fire.

She took a sharp breath and pushed up to her feet. She needed to walk around before her legs turned numb and she broke down in tears. Sitting there going stiff wasn't going to do her any favours, she needed to be up moving about.

Her hand pressed to her lower back and she grabbed her phone from the table when she looked across at the other side of the station. She could take some pictures. That would be enough to distract her and bring a smile to her face.

She could barely find the strength to put one foot in front of the other but she did her best, shuffling more than walking, to try and get as close to the make-shift dance floor.

Her heart swelled and a flutter of adrenaline coursed through her chest when she looked at her family.

Eddie had Violet's hands in his and the eldest girl stood so close she was almost standing on his feet. A bright smile lit up his face and creased his eyes as they danced and swayed from side to side and every few seconds, Eddie would shimmy Violet from left to right to make the hem of her dress spin and flutter.

Then there was Chris who was stood with Evan and Bobby, the three of them doing some sort of strange dance similar to the Macarana.

And Poppy and Jee were in the centre of the dancers, their hands tangled together, their knees bending and both of them were spinning in slow circles, doing their own sort of dance. They were the cutest sight. (Y/n) wondered how Evan wasn't over there taking dozens of photos or trying to join in already.

(Y/n) moved to the edge of the make shift dance floor, rubbing her left hand in circles along her back while she set her phone to record and slowly pointed around the dance floor. Capturing all of her family and friends enjoying themselves to the music, even Chimney and Maddie were up swaying to a rather upbeat song.

After a few moments, (Y/n) switched to taking photos and shuffled a bit closer while a tense smile pulled on her lips.

When another contraction hit, (Y/n) swallowed down a groan and let herself crease forward a bit to ease the tension and try to make the pain more bearable. But the pain seemed to extend and shake down to her feet and her thighs quaked together as her knees felt like they were going to buckle.

She didn't realise had doubled over even more until a groan tumbled past her llips and she suddenly realised tears were welling up in her eyes, ready to flush her face.

For a split second, Eddie looked away from Violet and glanced his eyes around the room. He knew (Y/n) hadn't eaten anything yet and she had been unusually quiet at the table earlier. But he couldn't see her sitting at the table any longer.

He scanned his eyes around while he twisted Violet to the left and let her tug and sway on his hands. But his lips fell from a smile into a confused frown when his gaze locked on his partner.

She was bent forward at an odd angle with her hand on her stomach and her other hand was shaking to the point she looked like she was about to drop her phone.

"Go to papa a minute, baby." He leaned down and pecked the top of Violet's head before he pointed her in Evan's direction.

Once she toddled off, Eddie weaved through the few other people dancing or letting loose, his hands moving to reach out for (Y/n) in case she lost her balance or crashed to her knees. His hands found her elbows and her felt her shudder and almost jump back until she realised who it was stood in front of her.

His thumbs smoothed up and down the creases of her elbows and he waited for (Y/n) to look up at him, but she wouldn't. Both of them looked down when (Y/n) grabbed his forearms and groaned.

Water trickled down her legs into a puddle at her feet.

Her waters had broken.

"Oh God. Buck!" Eddie twisted his head to the left and reached one hand out to beckon Evan over to them. They had a situation now.

He gently pulled (Y/n) closer to him and sidestepped a few paces until they were closer to a table and away from the dance floor. His brows rose when (Y/n) tightened her hold on him and pressed her forehead into his chest. There was no hiding now. (Y/n) couldn't play this off or pretend she was fine, not now her waters had broken and Eddie had seen her in agony.

"You're in labour, aren't you?" His lips hovered beside her ear and he gave her arms a squeeze when (Y/n) didn't bother to look at him, she just hummed.

Eddie nodded more to himself than to (Y/n) and let go of her arm so he could cup the back of her neck. He thought she looked uncomfortable earlier when the rest of them were eating and (Y/n) went quiet. He had seen her wriggle and try to get comfy or become uncomfortable when she tried to get up.

But they were thirty-five weeks along now, labour technically could happen at any point, although Eddie wasn't expecting it this early.

"Since when?" He murmured against the side of her head, a sense of authority in his words but a shiver ran down his spine when (Y/n) didn't answer him. She just stayed tucked up against his chest.

Both of them felt Evan hurrying up beside them. One hand clamped down on Eddie's shoulder while his other hand held (Y/n)'s elbow to try and keep her stood upright. She looked like she was about to go down on her knees. And Evan hadn't missed the small puddle of water on the floor when he rushed over. He could gather what had happened here.

"Baby, did your water break? Have we gotta go?" He rushed through his words, looking between both partners before he spun to glance behind him.

The music was being turned down and he could see Maddie and Chimney reaching out to stop the kids from rushing over or thinking something was wrong. There was no need for the kids to panic.

"Let's go sit down."

(Y/n) rolled her lips together and managed to lift her head when she felt the boys move round. Eddie was on her left with an arm curved around her back and her hand tangled with his. And Evan stood on her right, nodding silently at his sister when she pointed to her stomach and murmured 'the baby?' across the station.

Her legs felt like they had turned to jelly, she could barely lift her feet anymore but when another contraction tore through her stomach, (Y/n) stopped. Her temple flopped against Evan's arm and she tried to swallow down a groan as her knees bent and she tried to crouch down between the boys.

She didn't want to be stood up any longer. She wanted to kneel or sit down and she couldn't make it to a table.

The shallow, panting breaths she let out made Eddie's chest tighten and when (Y/n) started to groan and shake, Eddie looked between both partners.

"Do not tell me you're pushing already."

The growl that vibrated after his words made (Y/n) whimper and she looked up at him through hooded lashes that almost made him melt. She could feel the deep breaths he was taking to try and stay calm and she all but shuddered when Evan held her chin and tilted her head up in his direction.

"How long have you been in labour?" His arched brow and stern lips set in stone told (Y/n) not to bother trying to fob them off or pretend she wasn't sure. If she was close to pushing she had to know how long she had been having contractions. And neither of them were going to be impressed if she had kept this from them for longer than twenty minutes.

"S-since this morning?" It came out more of a question than an answer and tears trickled down (Y/n)'s face when Evan swore and a dark "This Morning?!" grumbled past Eddie's lips in retaliation.

"Christ baby, why the Hell didn't you say something?"

A tear rolled down (Y/n)'s cheek and made Evan's heart break and regret his words instantly. He wasn't trying to argue or get into an argument but he couldn't help how upset it made him that she had been suffering and in pain for ages and neither of them had known that she needed help.

"I'm sorry. I-it's your day-"

"Nevermind that mi amor, we need to get in the back room, we can't transport if you're already dilated."

Eddie didn't care for apologies, she didn't have to say sorry for not telling them, no matter how upset they might be that (Y/n) had clearly suffered all day without letting them know. They had to sit her down and get her checked over because if she was almost fully dilated, it wouldn't be wise to move her until after she'd had the baby. Unless they all felt like having their fourth baby in the back of the 118 ambulance.

"Can you watch the kids?" Evan looked across at his sister who nodded, Poppy already in her arms so the youngest didn't try and run off after her parents. While the three of them changed direction to aim for the locker room. It was the closest room without having to drag (Y/n) down the back corridor or hike her up the stairs.

"Hen I'll need a medic bag."

She was already off to get the kit whilst the three of them blundered into the locker room just as (Y/n) cried out and doubled forward. She was glad when Eddie moved to stand in front of her, moving her hands to his shoulders while his hands clamped down on her hips and held her up. He let her face smother into his chest and he held tight when she bent her knees and tried to hunker down.

They could both hear Evan muttering curse words under his breath while he shed his blazer and tossed his tie to one side. He made quick work of rolling up his sleeves before he went down on his knees behind (Y/n) and murmured a soft 'Let's have a look.'

Both men were suddenly glad they had taken their medals off almost as soon as they got given them. Chris was proudly wearing Eddie's medal and the last Evan saw of his, Poppy had been parading around with it, showing everyone the red ribbon that matched her name and her ruby red dress.

"Shit, you're crowning already. This is gonna be the first baby born in the station."

"I'm sorry-"

"Hey, no use apologising. Let's focus on meeting our boy, hm?" Eddie smothered his lips against the top of (Y/n)'s head, smiling into her hair when his eyes locked on Evan. Their partner was knelt on the floor, breathless and smiling proudly.

They didn't have to wait any longer to meet their second boy and even out the score to two boys and two girls. Their next bundle was about to arrive and Evan couldn't wait.

"Did I hear that right?" Hen questioned as she dumped a medic bag and some towels down beside Evan and reached out to hold (Y/n)'s hips. "Maybe we should sit you down, honey. This is baby number three for you, they're not gonna wait around."

Eddie carefully leaned (Y/n) back into Hen so he could shed his blazer and tie like Evan, before he went back to holding (Y/n). He and Hen turned her around and slowly lowered down to the floor with her in their hold.

She let herself ease back into Eddie's chest and tipped her head back on his shoulder while his arms cocooned around her waist. His chin perched on her shoulder and made a shudder run through her skin.

"Okay baby, keep pushing, you know what to do."

(Y/n) let out a groan and moved her hands until Eddie took the hint and deadlocked their hands together. He smothered his lips against the side of her head and pushed his chest forward into her back to keep (Y/n) sitting upright. While Evan had a towel over his lap, knelt between (Y/n)'s legs with Hen at their side getting the equipment out ready.

(Y/n) snapped her eyes closed and tucked her face into Eddie's neck, letting him curl around her like a blanket and smile against her temple.

"You're so close now, mi amor. What a way to celebrate, eh?"

Tears started to flush down (Y/n)'s face as a broken cry tore from her lips when she pushed forward and felt Eddie shuffle up behind her to keep her sitting upright and prop her up. He peppered his lips along her neck and over her cheek while he looked over her shoulder, grinning through tears when Evan shuffled forward with his hands stretched out.

"Head's out, one more push."

(Y/n) could see stars twinkling in front of her eyes and all the blood seemed to swim through her head. This felt so much quicker than the first time with Violet, possibly even quicker than when they had Poppy too and she wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

"Good girl, you've done it. This must be a record for us." Evan kissed her knee and felt her fingers shakily drag across the back of his neck while he looked down at the bundle in his arms.

And Eddie cupped his hand beneath her chin and gently lifted her head and let it fall into the crook of his neck. He pressed his lips against her temple and brushed his thumb up and down her cheek when he felt all the tension leave her body.

Her trembling hands reached out when Evan knelt between her thighs and carefully laid their boy on her chest. She could barely hear his cries from the static pulsing through her ears but she could feel his hands batting down on her chest and his cries vibrating through her ribs.

"You know it's supposed to be our day off, right?" Hen mused with a cheeky smile and she couldn't help but lean over to get a look at the new addition.

A lopsided grin flooded Evan's face as his hands smoothed up and down (Y/n)'s exposed thighs, both to comfort her and help get some circulation back through her legs. He leaned forward and pecked her lips, looking down at their little boy before he looked up and caught Eddie in a quick kiss.

"The kids are gonna be thrilled." Evan glanced to the left and took a peek through the doorway.

They knew both Chris and Violet would be bouncing off the walls right now, desperate to see their parents and their new brother before they had to go to the hospital. But all of them knew Poppy probably wouldn't be happy that now she wouldn't be able to stay with any of her parents. She would have to make do with her aunt or her grandad Bobby for a while.

Eddie kissed her temple again and reached a hand down to brush his thumb along their son's cheek.

"Thank you for the present, mi amor."

"Yeah," Evan mused, tangling his fingers with Eddie's on top of their son's chest. "This is better than any medal."

#imagine #911 imagine #evan buckley #eddie diaz x reader #evan buckley x reader #pregnant! reader #evan buckley imagine #buck x reader #buck imagine #eddie x buck #eddie diaz imagine #eddie x reader #buddie

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glorious-spoon · 3 days

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finding excuses to be alone with each other - Buddie

hi, and thank you! sorry this has taken a while, and also i have no explanation for why i decided to write new year's eve fic in june. BUT: here you are!

a stolen moment

There are too many people at this party.

Normally, this isn't something Buck would even think to complain about. Maddie and Chim are hosting, since Bobby and Athena are still living out of a tiny one-bedroom while work continues on their house, and Hen and Karen are still trying to get Mara settled back at home—New Year's parties are apparently not conducive to a quiet, predictable bedtime routine, and the Wilson family unit will probably be heading out well before the ball drops anyway—and nobody else has even close to enough room. It's still packed to the brim, overflowing onto the back patio, clusters of people chatting over drinks in the kitchen while the kids have taken over the living room TV for a vicious Mario Kart showdown that Chris is currently winning. Maddie's in the back bedroom putting Jee down for bedtime, and Chim is holding court over the dessert table, and it's all—great, honestly, it's great. It's awesome, having his family here, and happy, and together under the same roof after the year they've all had.

He glances up and meets Eddie's eye from across the dining room. Gets a quick smile in return. Eddie's cheeks are pink, maybe from the warmth, maybe from the two glasses of wine he's had, since Buck will be the one driving them home. He's wearing a green Henley that Buck knows is exactly as soft as it looks and worn-in jeans that mold lovingly to the lines of his thighs as he leans back against the door frame, and it's all pretty distressing, honestly. Buck's hands are itching to touch.

When he meets Eddie's eyes again, Eddie is grinning broadly. Caught, Buck ducks his head. He's blushing, he knows, and he doesn't have the excuse of the wine.

They're keeping it to themselves, at least for now. That was the decision they both made after Eddie kissed him in the loft two nights ago, after Buck kissed him back, after they didn't actually manage to make it all the way up to the bed and ended up on the couch instead, gasping into each other's mouths, fumbling and eager as teenagers. They're keeping it to themselves until Eddie figures out how he's going to tell Chris. He's skittish about that still, and Buck isn't going to push. So he'll probably be sleeping on the fold-out couch tonight instead of in Eddie's bed, and he's not going to kiss Eddie in the middle of the party, no matter how much he wants to.

It's okay. They have time.

"Hey, didn't someone bring dessert plates?" Chim calls from the kitchen. "Please tell me someone brought dessert plates, we're all out of the big ones and I'm really not up for doing dishes tonight."

Ah, shit. Right. That was Buck's job. He's pretty sure he did pick some up, actually, but they're probably still out in the Jeep, which is parked somewhere in the snarl of cars crowding the Han driveway and pulled off to the side of the street in front of their lawn.

"I got 'em," he calls, setting his soda down.

"My hero," Chim retorts, only half-teasing by his tone. Buck rolls his eyes and goes to find his shoes.

He doesn't realize that Eddie is following him until he's already slipped them on in the entry hall, a few steps away from the party. "What's up?"

Eddie shrugs, guileless, and crouches down to retrieve his shoes as well. "Figured I'd help you."

"You figured you'd help me…. bring in a package of paper plates?"

"Yeah," Eddie says innocently, but there's a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, and god, Buck really wants to kiss him.

"Okay," he agrees instead, and pulls open the door. Eddie follows him out into the night, cool and dim even with Christmas lights still lit up all down the street. There's a dampness to the air that feels like rain; it's not that cold, but it's enough of a contrast to the warm house that a shiver goes through him. Eddie falls into step beside him, then reaches for his hand.

Buck shivers again, for reasons that have nothing to do with the cold this time. Eddie's hand is warm and broad, and he strokes his thumb lightly against Buck's, lighting up nerve endings he didn't even know he had.

It's such a small thing. But they've never actually done this yet. It all feels so new, sparkling like fireworks through his veins.

"Okay?" Eddie asks, and Buck realizes that he's stopped walking.

"Yeah," he says. He's not doing a very good job of keeping the smile off his face, or out of his voice, but Eddie's got the exact same dopey smile on his face, so it's fine. They weave through the cars to where Buck's Jeep is parked, close enough to the street that they'll probably be able to get out without playing vehicle Tetris. Far enough from the house that they're shielded from view by Bobby's truck parked alongside them, so he's not all that surprised when Eddie lets go of his hand only to push him gently against the side of the Jeep and kiss him.

He gets lost in that for a little bit. The heat of Eddie's mouth, his hands moving from Buck's shoulders to cradle his jaw—he did that the first time, too. Held Buck like he's holding him now, like he's something precious and worth treating with care, and Buck's already hooked on it. He slides his hand up Eddie's back, feeling the warmth of him, to cup the back of his neck as Eddie licks into his mouth with leisurely sweetness, like he's got all the time in the world to kiss Buck just like this on the sidewalk on New Year's Eve.

Sooner or later, someone's going to come looking for them. It still takes a while for Buck to break the kiss, and when Eddie tugs lightly at his lower lip with his teeth before pulling away, he almost dives back in again. Almost.

"We should probably get back to the party," he says, very reluctantly.

"Yeah," Eddie sighs. He leans in and kisses Buck again, a sweeter, softer thing before leaning past him to open the door. Buck ducks into the back seat to retrieve the package of plates and the bottle of wine they forgot to bring in earlier, and when he straightens up, Eddie is watching him. He looks—hesitant, almost. Nervous. He looks the way he looked two days ago, right before he kissed Buck.

"What's up?" Buck asks.

"I want to tell Chris," Eddie says, all in a rush. "Maybe not—right now, at the party, but when we get home, I want to tell him. About us."

Buck takes a quick, sharp breath. "Are you sure?"

"I've never been as sure about anything in my life as I am about you."

"Eddie."

"It's the truth. And—I want him to know. Even if it's an adjustment, even if it takes some time to—I want him to know. I want everyone to know. If that's okay with you."

"Eddie," Buck says again, and then, "yeah, yeah of course it's okay."

"Good," Eddie says, with a sudden, brilliant smile. And well—Chim can wait a few more minutes for his paper plates. Buck sets them down and pulls Eddie back in.

#911 #911 fic #buddie #buddie fic #eddie diaz #evan buckley #prompt fic #my fic

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ashwhowrites · 15 hours

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Older Eddie finding out you’re pregnant and has hard emotions over it. He’s excited but nervous because of his age and reader overhears him saying he doesn’t know if he can be a dad and you choose the ending

I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻

Baby talk

Eddie had his dream of having a wife and kids, but it fizzled out the older he got. It never seemed to be in his cards and he found himself okay with that. He didn't feel like he was missing out on anything. He enjoyed his life the way it was.

He had been together with Y/N for about two years. He loved that she wasn't in a rush to be married. She was young and had many years before she felt like her time was cutting short.

Y/N knew Eddie didn't have a plan in mind for having kids, and it wasn't something they talked about too much. She knew at his age, that kids were the last thing on his mind. She'd be lucky to even get a ring on her finger.

As she looked at the five pregnancy tests on the bathroom counter, she feared to tell Eddie the news.

"BABE?"

She jumped into action as she heard his voice. Scrambling to throw the tests into the trash can. She washed off her hands by the time he made it into the doorway.

"Just using the bathroom, what's up?" She asked, a fake smile plastered on her face

"Home from work and was thinking about ordering pizza?"

"Sounds good,"

Eddie nodded and walked out of the room to call the pizza place. YN looked at herself in the mirror and wondered what the hell she was going to do.

~~~

It had been almost two months and she hadn't said a word. She dumped out the trash and tried to forget it.

But now she was sick every morning, and her emotions were all out of whack

She knew she needed to say something before she began to show. She was scared and she hated that it was her own secret. She had all this on her shoulders and needed to share the weight.

"You okay? You barely ate your dinner," Eddie said, he sat across her at the restaurant. Couples talking all around them but they sat in silence. He watched her as she slowly picked at her food. He knew something was going on. She always looked tired, he'd hear her cry all throughout the day and he spent every morning holding her hair back.

"Would you ever want kids?" She asked, finally looking up

Eddie coughed as he was caught off guard

"Um, I don't know. I guess if I'm being honest, I would live perfectly fine without them." He shrugged, "But if it was something you wanted, I'd make it work."

"Make it work?" Y/N scoffed, "What just suffer and stick around because you got trapped?"

Eddie blinked at her aggression

"I didn't say that" Eddie deflected, "I just think if it happened, it would take me a while to be good with that. I never saw myself as a dad and it would be a lot to learn."

"Would you be happy?" she asked, her stomach began to turn and she felt vomit in the back of her throat

"I don't know,"

"Well, figure it out within these next seven months." She said she watched as his eyes shot open and he looked down at her body and back up again

"You're pregnant?" He choked out

She bit her lip nervously as she nodded

"Dammit" Eddie whispered to himself as he sighed

"Dammit?" She snapped, "That is all you have to say!" She stood up and slammed down her napkin.

Eddie watched as she marched out of the restaurant. He quickly threw as much cash as he had on the table and followed after her.

The car ride was silent. Every word that left Eddie's lips was ignored. She had her arms crossed as hot anger tears rolled down her face.

Eddie pulled into his driveway and she was fast to get out of the car.

"Baby, can we please talk?" He asked once they made it through the front door

"Sleep on the couch, asshole." She spat as she yanked off her heels and walked down the hallway.

Y/N wasn't sure how long she stared at the wall in silence but she knew it had been a while

She closed her eyes when she heard the bedroom door open.

Eddie slowly lifted up the sheets and crawled into the bed

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you" he whispered, he wrapped his arms around her body and pressed her into his chest. "I was caught off guard and surprised. I thought we were always safe."

"Not safe enough," she snapped. She wanted to stay mad but his arms and lips kissing up and down her neck made her melt

"I'm going to be right here the whole time. You're not alone. We will do this together."

She rolled over, tears in her eyes as she tried to find his eyes in the dark

"Good because I am really scared," she cried

"It'll be okay." He soothed, leaned in, and pecked her lips

~~~

"Here is your beer, love," Y/N said as she placed the beer on the small table

It had been a crazy few months. She was now eight months and they were preparing for their baby to arrive.

"Thank you," he said as he pecked her cheek. Then turned his attention back to painting the wall

"I think this color looks great," Y/N smiled as she rubbed her bump. The light blue brightened up the nursery in the perfect way.

"I agree. The crib and changing table will be delivered tomorrow so Wayne will be over to help out. You just stay in bed and relax." Eddie said as he set down his paintbrush and grabbed his beer.

Y/N sat in her bed as she watched TV. Wayne and Eddie were down a few doors putting together the last few touches of the nursery.

She sighed as she grew restless, she needed to move. She climbed out of bed as fast as she could. Then walked out to the kitchen, she figured she could make lunch for the boys.

She finished the sandwiches and grabbed some beers. With her hands full, she walked to the room. But she stopped when she heard the two in a heated discussion.

"You are not walking out on her or that baby, Eddie," Wayne's voice was aggressive and stern. Y/N felt her heart drop at the thought.

"I didn't say that! I'm just fucking terrified. I'm too old to be starting over in my life. A newborn? That is a ton of work, and even more for someone who is as old as me." Eddie sighed

"I don't give a shit what age you are. Teenager, her age, or your age, doesn't matter, you are having a baby. I'm sure she's scared. And I'm sure she has been scared since she found out. She needs someone to count on, and you need to be that person. Having a kid will always be scary."

"I know! But what about when he starts school? I'm going to drop him off and be older than every dad there. I'll be a grandpa age by the time he gets into college. I don't know if I can be a dad."

"Edward quit making this about you! Who cares if you are older than the other dads. You've got an advantage. You've been working for years, probably a better income than they have. You have benefits that you can support her and your child with. You already made a fuss when she told you, don't make another scene." Wayne lectured

Eddie sat in silence and Y/N took the cue to walk in

"Lunch is served" she announced as she walked in. Acting like she didn't hear a single word.

"Thank you, dear," Wayne said as he pecked her head

"You didn't have to, you are supposed to be in bed," Eddie said as he pecked her cheek.

"I needed to move my legs," Y/N shrugged, "can I talk to you for a second?"

Eddie nodded and followed her into their bedroom

"Everything okay?" he asked as he softly touched her stomach

"Do you want to be a dad or not? Because it seemed like we figured it out and we were on the right track. And if you don't want him, you don't get me. I want this and I want us to be a family. But if you don't want that, be a man and tell me so I can figure out what I'm going to do for my child." She ranted, her arms crossed as she panted. She tried to keep her tears back.

Eddie sighed and sat on the bed. He grabbed her hand and moved her to stand between his legs. He released her hand to place both on her stomach and looked up at her

"He's our child. I am not walking away from you or him, and I never will. I know I'm all over the place, but I do want this. I'm worried about my age and how that might affect me being a good dad. I just don't want to let him down and I don't want you to regret having this magical moment with me and not someone who has a better grip on things." Eddie said

"Oh Eddie," she sighed then placed her hands on his cheeks. "You won't let him down. All you have to do is love and support him, which I know you can do. I don't want anyone else. I want this baby with you. I know you can do this. I believe in you." She leaned down and pecked his lips.

"I love you," he said against her lips

"I love you too"

And she was right. The second their baby was born, Eddie became the best dad she had ever seen. He adored Gavin, and Gavin was glued to his dad's hip. They were best friends and Y/N couldn't have been happier.

Eddie's fear never went away, but he treasured every moment he had with his family. He became a dad and he conquered it. Next, he was ready to conquer being a husband.

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlx @ineedmentalhelp123

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson fanfic #eddie stranger things #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson request #eddie munson fluff x reader #eddie munson angst #eddie munson angst x reader #ashwhowrites #older eddie munson #older eddie munson x female reader

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diazsdimples · 1 day

Text

Tommy can remember the day he knew he was going to kill Vincent Gerrard. Or, not kill exactly, but do some serious, irreparable damage to him. He'd kind of figured this day would come, if the way he felt like ripping the old man's mustache right off his face whenever Buck came home upset was anything to go by. He just didn't think it would happen quite so soon. He's held Buck plenty of times after rough shifts, where Gerrard would make him man behind for no other reason than "I want this place clean and perfectly organized. That's what you people do, isn't it?". He's heard enough stories from Eddie, and Hen, and Chim, about the abuse they were all getting but how most of Gerrard's hellfire seemed directed towards Buck.

But nothing could prepare him for the fury he felt when that day arrived.

He'd gotten a text from Eddie, a short and simple "he needs you", and he'd been in his car in a flash. The whole drive he'd been worrying, not sure what he'd be arriving to.

When he gets there, he knows it’s bad. Hen and Chimney are locked in a furious screaming match with Gerrard, their faces all varying shades of puce, and it looks like Hen's about to punch Gerrard in the nose, based off the hand Chimney has wrapped tightly around her wrist.

He spots Eddie and Buck immediately; they're in the locker room and Eddie has his arm around Buck's shoulders. When he looks up and locks eyes with Tommy, he can see the flames of rage licking behind Eddie's eyes. Buck's got his face in his hands, and his shoulders are shaking in a way that tells Tommy that he's crying. Tommy's across the station in 3 quick strides, dropping to his knees in front of Buck and taking his face in his hands, stroking his thumbs over his cheekbones.

"What the hell happened?" he asks Eddie, because Buck's not in any shape to breathe right now, let alone talk.

Eddie doesn't reply immediately, but his jaw ticks and he looks like he's carefully picking his words. Just as he's about to speak, Buck's voice, quiet and broken, cuts through the silence.

"He made me watch."

Tommy's brow furrows in confusion, and a ball of dread settles in the pit of his stomach. Buck swallows convulsively and even Eddie looks like he might throw up. It's bad.

"Watch what?" Tommy asks carefully. He doesn't want to push it, not if Buck isn't up to speaking, but he needs to know.

Eddie speaks up first, and his voice is shaky too.

"We were called to a massive haemorrhage at the Pride Event in West Hollywood. A man and his husband had been attacked by one of those bible bashers that stand there and tell everyone they're going to hell. A bystander said they'd been arguing with him and he pulled a knife. Got the first guy in the stomach, second just above his heart. There was nothing we could do."

Buck takes a deep breath, a whine issuing from the back of his throat. Tommy puts a hand around the back of his neck and rubs soothing circles just below his hairline.

"He made me watch," Buck repeats again, a little louder this time, and Tommy's heart clenches cause he knows, he fucking knows what Buck is going to say next. "He said "ride with Wilson, Buckley. This is a good opportunity for you to increase your medic skills." He knew they weren't going to survive but he made me...." Buck trails off, unable to finish his sentence, and Tommy's vision goes red. He's never hated anyone more than he hates Gerrard right now.

That is, until Buck finishes his sentence.

"He said "you might learn something valuable," but he wasn't talking about the job."

Buck's fists are clenched so tight his knuckles are white, and there's blood under his fingernails. Eddie's got a fistful of Buck's shirt clenched tightly in his fist and he looks like he's doing all he can to not run upstairs and tear Gerrard limb from limb.

There's a ringing in Tommy's ears and everything sounds kind of muffled, like his head is underwater. He's clutching the back of Buck's neck so hard that it's got to be painful, but he can't make himself let go.

When he left the military, Tommy made a vow that he would never take another man's life. But for this - for Gerrard - for what he did to Buck, the light of Tommy's life, he might just make an exception.

#james writes #bucktommy #bucktommy ficlet #bucktommy headcanon #evan buckley #tommy kinard #911 abc #911 #911verse #911 fanfic #911 ficlet #vincent gerrard #tevan #kinley #firepilot #evan buckley x tommy kinard #tw: death #tw: murder #tw: homophobia

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steddieas-shegoes · 2 days

Text

He’s not sure why he even comes to these parties anymore. He used to sell at the frat houses, made his rounds until he was out of product, made more money than any minimum wage job he could find near campus.

But he hasn’t in a while. Months, at this point.

It’s just that every time he came to one of these idiotic showing of riches and popularity, the most beautiful man he’d ever seen was sitting in the corner of the kitchen watching with a faraway look in his eyes. Sometimes he stood in a group of people in the living room, but never contributed to the conversation. Once, Eddie saw him swinging his feet back and forth in the water of the hot tub on the back patio with three different couples making out inside it, completely zoned out.

Eddie needs to keep an eye on him. Hence, he attends the stupid parties.

And it’s stupid, to go through so much trouble for a guy he doesn’t even know, who probably doesn’t even notice him back. It’s stupid, but Eddie’s never claimed to be very bright.

Which is probably why he walks up to the guy when he’s about two seconds from punching Tommy Hagan, grabs his wrists, and tugs.

“The fuck are you?” He asks Eddie, reasonably confused and angry at being interrupted by a stranger.

Eddie could feel his pulse against his fingers, swore he could feel a spark of electricity flow between them.

“Eddie. Just leave him. Whatever he did isn’t worth it,” he said through clenched teeth.

His fingers tightened around Steve’s wrists as he considered trying to pick him up, throw him over his shoulder, and walk out of this party entirely.

“How the hell do you know?” Steve wasn’t trying to pull away.

Eddie didn’t let himself think about that too much.

“I just know nothing Hagan does is ever worth trouble for you. C’mon,” Eddie tugged on his wrists again, and this time, it seemed to catch the guy off guard.

“Didn’t know you were into freaks, Harrington,” Tommy said as they took a few steps away from him. “If you’re gonna be gay, you could at least have taste.”

Eddie froze.

The guy, Harrington, tried to pull his wrists loose, but Eddie didn’t let him.

He turned to Tommy, the guy who almost got him arrested for selling at his party only a few months ago, and smirked.

If he was gonna out someone to a stranger, Eddie had no problem doing the same right now.

“And you just sucked my dick because you wanted to add it to your résumé?” Eddie grinned at Tommy, who quickly looked around to make sure no one else heard.

“As if I would-“ he tried to say, but Harrington cut him off.

“You forget you say shit when you’re high. You told me about it already. I think your exact words were, ‘he had the best dick I’ve ever seen, Steve.’ Or am I mixing that up with another dick?” Steve pulled one arm loose from Eddie’s grip, brushed hair from his face, and let it relax at his side.

Eddie could let go now, he was sure if anyone would start something at this point it would be Tommy. But Steve wasn’t trying to pull his other wrist loose and Eddie liked the warmth of him in his hand.

“Whatever man, just go. You don’t even wanna be here,” Tommy turned and left before Steve could respond.

Eddie finally let go, but he didn’t like the immediate sense of loss that filled his chest.

“You always interrupt strangers before they fight?” Steve asked him, hands shoved into his pockets.

Eddie really looked at him, inspected him. He only ever saw him at these parties, so the lighting was shit, but he’d noticed the dark shadows under his eyes a while ago. He noticed that he held himself in a way that showed he was always ready for a fight. Steve’s hair had gone flat over the last month or so, not nearly as voluminous or shiny as it had been at the start of the year.

“Are you okay?” He asked instead of answering the question.

“I’m fine, dude.”

Eddie shook his head. “You don’t seem okay.”

“Then why did you ask?”

“Just seems like something is bothering you,” Eddie wouldn’t push more, not if Steve was actually gonna get mad. But something told him that nobody pushed Steve to talk enough.

Eddie had Wayne back home, and his friends in his band here, and a couple coworkers at the bar he worked at twice a week now that he could joke around with. Steve didn’t even seem to have the people he hung around with.

“Why does it matter to you if something is bothering me?”

That’s a fair question. Why does it matter to him?

“Maybe because I just wanted to help. That’s what people do, right?”

“Not for me, usually.”

Eddie stepped closer, barely leaving space between them. “Well, I am.”

Steve stared back at him, shoulders dropping and eyes losing that angry fire.

“Why?”

Eddie was an idiot sometimes, but he was able to read people pretty well. It’s what kept him safe for most of middle and high school, and made him friends in college.

He knew what it looked like to be lonely and depressed, and Steve had check marks next to both of those.

“You wanna get out of here?” Eddie asked, once again avoiding his question.

“And go where?”

“I’ll show you my favorite getting high spot.”

“I don’t really smoke with strangers,” Steve seemed nervous.

“You don’t have to smoke. I’m just gonna show you the place.”

He watched Steve think about it, noting the way his brows scrunched together, how he bit his bottom lip, how he looked at the ground instead of at Eddie.

“Fine. But if you murder me in the woods, my mom will have you hanged,” Steve finally said.

“Hanged? Do they even do that anymore?”

Steve giggled. “Probably not. But she’d find a way.”

“Well, I’ve got no interest in murdering you, big boy.”

The blush that filled Steve’s cheeks was stunning. A perfect pink dusting his skin, giving him a healthier glow than what he’d had for a while.

“What do you have interest in?”

Eddie could say any number of things to flirt, make his true intentions clear, maybe even go straight back to his single dorm instead of showing Steve anywhere.

But Eddie figured that’s all Steve was used to, or maybe he was always the one who had to put an effort into things.

Maybe he wasn’t used to getting treated like a human being.

“I’d like to get to know you. Parties like this aren’t really a good place to learn about someone’s favorite song or what they snack on when they wake up in the middle of the night.”

Steve seemed shocked by this answer, but his features quickly melted into a soft smile, one Eddie would want to see every single day.

“Fine. But it’s not a date,” Steve held out his hand, ready to be led.

Instead of lacing his fingers with Steve’s, or even just grabbing his hand in his palm, he wrapped his fingers around Steve’s wrist again.

“We’ll see.”

———

On graduation day, Steve and Eddie found their way back to their spot, one they’d probably never visit again.

Eddie’s fingers were curled around Steve’s wrist as they stood facing each other, close enough to feel each other’s breaths against their lips.

Nearly two years together, nearly 300 trips to this spot, and more than 500 dates that they never called dates.

And it was just the beginning.

Eddie leaned in to press his lips to Steve’s gently, keeping it soft so they wouldn’t get carried away.

They had to meet Wayne at the Italian restaurant in less than an hour and then Steve’s mom expected them back at Steve’s apartment for a wine and dessert celebration.

They wouldn’t be properly alone like this again for at least a couple days, but they didn’t have time to do much about it right now.

“I love you,” Eddie whispered as he rested his forehead against Steve’s.

“I love you, too,” Steve said back.

He didn’t have dark shadows under his eyes anymore, spending more nights sleeping in bed with Eddie than awake at parties he didn’t want to be at. His hair had most of its shine back. He’d put on a few pounds after joining the gym again, using it as an outlet for stress instead of hiding in corners at parties where he would drink just enough to get buzzed four times a week.

He made friends with Eddie’s friends, plus some of his own when he got a part time job at the coffee shop on campus.

Steve never spoke to Tommy again, at least as far as Eddie knew. He didn’t seem interested in being his friend again, and once he told Eddie more about their “friendship”, he couldn’t really blame him.

“You ready to go see Wayne?” Steve asked him, probably more excited than even Eddie was.

Wayne and Steve bonded quickly and they’d probably spend most of the lunch talking about sports and where they would go fishing this summer.

Eddie nodded, but he pulled something from his pocket before Steve could pull away and start walking back to the car they now shared.

“What’s that?” Steve asked, pointing towards the envelope in Eddie’s hand.

“It’s a gift from me to you. Well, I guess both of us, but I really got it for you.”

He handed it to Steve, who opened it quickly.

He pulled out the paper inside and Eddie watched his eyes fly across the words written there.

“Eddie.”

“Stevie.”

“You got us a trip to Italy? How the fuck did you get us a trip to Italy?” Steve was looking at him, eyes wet with tears.

“Doesn’t matter how. Wayne gave us some money for it, so did your mom. I’ve been saving for a year. Want us to have something special before we have to start working.” Eddie kissed his forehead. “Plus I want any excuse to see you in some of those see-through linen shorts.”

Steve’s lips were on his, his arms wrapped around Eddie’s neck. Eddie wrapped his arms around his waist to hold him there.

“I’ll wear them every day,” he gasped as he leaned in for another kiss.

Eddie laughed. “You won’t hear any complaints from me, sugar.”

“I can’t believe you did this. All I got you was a t-shirt.”

“You know I love t-shirts. I know you love Italy. It’s a win-win for both of us.”

Steve rolled his eyes, but kissed him again.

His eyes widened. “Oh my god. Are you gonna propose in Italy?”

Eddie snorted. “Why would I answer that question?”

“Because! I have to know!”

“Why?”

“So I can make sure I have a nice outfit for pictures, dumbass.”

“You’ll just have to wait and see. You look good in everything,” Eddie kissed the top of his head before he wrapped his fingers around Steve’s wrist and tugged on it once. “Let’s get to Wayne before he sends a search party.”

Eddie smiled to himself as they walked to the car, Steve’s rambling about what he wanted to do in Italy keeping his mind from wandering too far. He couldn’t help thinking about the ring he had stashed away in his guitar case, though.

Italy was the perfect place to propose.

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #idk I needed to get this off the notes app #but I just think Eddie taking Steve away from his very sad popular rich kid life is exactly how it goes in every universe #very Aladdin of him actually #drabble

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eddieandbird · 2 days

Text

Puppy—

Art calls you out after you give him the silent treatment.

A/N: sorry this is not eddie/st related!! I am OBSESSED with challengers and unfortunately im an Art Donaldson apologist so yeah. completely AU! no movie spoilers at all, just nasty girl shit. -bird

———

You were sitting on his bed, repeatedly scrolling on your phone. It was as if Art was invisible to you while he stared at you, twisting his racket into the carpet as he sat across from you.

You could feel his stare and your eyes finally rose just above the phone, still covering a majority of your face.

“What do you want?” You sneered.

“Are you going to tell me why you’re mad or are you going to keep ignoring me like a bitch?” He asked unenthusiastically, his eyes threatening to roll back as he gave a wry smile.

“Art, I already told you, I’m not mad,” You said bitterly as your eyes flicked back to your phone.

“And I am going to tell you again that it’s obvious that you are, and you won’t even explain to me why.” He replied before moving to sit down on the bed right next to you.

He leaned over, attempting to peer over the top of the phone screen to look at your face. Art then gently grabbed hold of the top of your phone, tilting it upwards to try and view your face. He grinned mischievously as he attempted to pry the device out of your hands.

“Give it back, Art. I’m not playing with you,” You warned, your eyes dark and confusing. He could never read your expression, but that’s probably one of the reasons he was so in love with you.

“Oh?” He teased as he snatched the device out of your hands, holding it above his head as he held it out of your reach.

Art grinned as he saw your frustrated expression as he taunted you for a brief moment, until he looked at the phone screen to see what had you so riled up.

It was an online article about the last tournament. He immediately handed the phone back with a look of disbelief.

“Babe. You’ve been mad at me about the game?”

“I told you not to look,” You grunted as you elbowed him in the ribs and snatched your phone back. He groaned softly as he flinched from the impact of it.

“I’m not mad about your fucking tournament,” You scoffed, plopping back into bed. You sprawled out on your stomach, going back to scrolling on your phone again, going silent once more.

“You’re absolutely infuriating.” He huffed, uncomfortably shifting back in the chair beside your bed.

He paused for a moment, staring down at your face from above. He studied your expression intently, trying to figure out what had you so frustrated.

“And you’re getting lazy. You don’t think I know why you keep losing your matches, but I see right through you, Art,” Your brows furrowed as you sat up to finally look at him. You draped yourself over your knees, your head propped up on your arms.

“You just know everything don’t you?” He muttered under his breath, his eyes studying your facial expressions.

He raised an eyebrow at your comment, his expression growing more serious.

He suddenly grabbed a hold of your chin, tilting your face upwards as he leaned in close. He stared deep into your eyes as a tense silence filled the room.

“If you think you know everything, smartass, then tell me why do I keep losing my matches?”

You roughly shook out of his grip then grabbed him back by the chin and pinched his cheeks inward.

“Because you’re mad at me. You’re mad that I fucking told you I don’t need all that romantic shit, I don’t want you to call me your girlfriend. But you decided to fall in love with me anyway,” You growled. “Now you’re so stuck on me, you can’t win any of your games,”

“You’re such a jerk” He hissed with his cheeks squished in between your fingers.

Art was completely and utterly dumbfounded by your response, blinking a few times in bewilderment.

He then let out a bitter laugh.

“That’s bullshit and you know it, you’re just making up shit because you’re just as obsessed with me as I am with you.” He snapped back, pulling back from your grip on him, stumbling back on his feet.

“And what if I am?” You scoffed in disbelief.

You knew you felt something for him, but you refused to let him know. You liked what you had with Art, you didn’t need to define it, but he tested your patience everyday.

“That doesn’t mean you’re my boyfriend, Art,” You stood up with him, your arms folded tight as your intimidating gaze reached him.

Art stared at you for a moment, his expression a mixture of shock and frustration.

“So what am I then? Just a meaningless fling? Is all this completely one-sided to you?”

Art snapped back, his fists balled tight and his jaw clenched. He couldn’t seem to comprehend your lack of emotions, his gaze fixated on you, searching for any hint of affection in your eyes.

You inhaled deeply through your nostrils and exhaled through your mouth, trying to regulate your heart.

You grabbed his collar, pulling his forehead to yours.

“You are here to adore me… to chase me… to fuck me…” Your tone was raspy and gruff.

You tugged down on his shoulders, forcing him on his knees. You now hovered over him. You raked a hand through his hair, lifting his head and bringing his gaze back to you.

“You are my puppy,” Your thumb grazed his face, affectionately.

You loved the dumb look he gave you when you did this. His clear blue eyes looked so much better when he was eager to submit to you.

Art’s eyes widened as his knees hit the floor, staring up at your form above him. Even from the floor, he was tall enough to reach your collar if he was on his knees. Art’s face flushed red as his cheeks heated under your touch. He looked up at you as his eyes flickered between your gaze and your pink lips.

When he felt your thumb gently graze against his cheek, he let out a soft whine and nuzzled into your hand.

A malicious smirk grew as your thumb dragged down his lips, parting them slightly.

“You are adorable and utterly pathetic,” You pouted at him. “And you’re mine,”

This isn’t just what he wanted, he craved it. Art was never happier than underneath your thumb. He whimpered softly.

His eyes widened once more as he heard your demeaning words, a shiver running down his spine. His heart raced as you claimed him as yours. His pupils dilated as he gave in to your teasing, rubbing his face into your hand, silently begging for affection.

“See that wasn’t that hard, was it?” you laughed.

“Now stop having a fucking attitude with me and tell me what you really want, hm?” you dragged your finger up his neck and rested it under his chin.

Art’s face flushed even more as you asked him what he wanted. He stared up at you with an expectant expression and a pleading look in his eyes.

“Can I have a kiss?” He muttered shyly as he glanced away, feeling too embarrassed to make eye contact with you.

“That’s it. You’re so much better when you’re well behaved,” You lifted his chin with your fingertips. As he looked at you, you laughed softly as he gave you his dumb, desperate look.

“You can have a kiss, Puppy. Open your mouth,” You demanded, sticking out your own tongue to demonstrate what you wanted.

Art slowly parted his lips, his tongue sticking out slightly, imitating you. His face was burning red at this point, staring up at you. Art’s grip on your hips seemed to tighten as he became extremely flustered and eager for your affection.

You spat into his mouth, your saliva trailed down your tongue onto his. You were pleased to watch him keep his mouth open and accept you. You slowly lowered your mouth down giving him a sloppy kiss, your tongue exploring his before encasing his lips in yours. You then tugged his hair back to get a glimpse of him falling apart.

“Was that what you wanted, Puppy?” Your voice hoarse with desire as you continued to toy with his hair.

Art then whimpered even more when you tugged him back. He was completely at your mercy as he panted softly. When you spoke in a huskier tone, his knees would have buckled if he wasn’t kneeling already, making him shiver with excitement.

“Mhm. More please..”

You found him so adorable when he begged like this. You leaned down to kiss him some more, distracting him as you pulled down your shorts and panties. You led him with just your lips to the edge of the bed where you sat, your legs propped up on the wooden frame of it.

Art was absolutely lost in the sensations, practically in a trance. He willingly let you guide him, moving wherever you directed him to go without any protest.

Once you led him to the edge of the bed, he knelt down on the floor in between your legs and began to nuzzle his face against your inner thigh.

Art was panting softly, staring up at you with a needy expression.

“Babe, are you..” Art muttered, his thoughts completely broken and scattered as he stared at you with an expression of excitement and eagerness.

“Hm? What was that, Puppy. You gotta speak up,” You cooed as you watched him crawl toward you.

You laced your fingers in his hair once more as you quietly exhaled. His soft lips gently nibbling on your sensitive skin made you loudly exhale in response. Art let out a soft moan as he heard your teasing. When he heard your gasp, a shiver ran down his spine as he looked up at you, a look of satisfaction growing on his face.

“Can I taste you?” Art mumbled against your thigh, his grip on your legs getting a bit tighter.

“Yeah. Make me come,” You laid back, propped up on your elbows.

You spread your legs, allowing him to feast his eyes on your glistening pussy. You craved having his mouth on you. You wanted to use it.

Art’s lips parted with a soft gasp as he stared at your beautiful body for a moment. His eyes flicked back up to your face, looking at you for a bit before he slowly began planting kisses down your inner thighs, his warm breath brushing against your skin. He left a trail of gentle nibbles on you, drawing closer to your eager center which he knew he couldn’t wait to taste.

As Art started greedily lapping at your center, you threw your head back in pleasure. Your quiet whimpers were addicting to him. Your grip on his hair got even rougher as he continued. You loved the wet noises that came from his tongue.

“Such a good fucking boy,” You exhaled loudly.

Art felt his face burn as he heard your moans and your tight grip in his hair. He loved pleasing you, so much that he was willing to do anything for you.

He eagerly lapped at your center, his eyes meeting yours. He was incredibly flustered to know that you were loving what he was doing, the desire to please you even more increasing as he continued. As your thigh squeezed against him, his eyes flickered shut as he began to focus more on your sounds and your reactions.

Your body pressing against his face made him feel a bit lightheaded but he was too eager to care, wanting to continue to please you. He began to lick even faster, his gaze still fixed on your face as his tongue twisted against your sensitive skin. Art’s hands gripped your thighs, desperate to hold on to you while he worshiped you.

“Art!” You hissed, almost forgetting to keep your voice down.

You shuddered against him as you reached your high. Your hand finally released your grip on his hair as you lazily dragged yourself on his tongue. You smiled with satisfaction as you wiped the sweat and your essence off his bottom lip.

“God, baby, you’re amazing,” You mused.

Art gasped softly as your hand left his hair, feeling incredibly proud in making you reach your high.

Once you got a good look at him, he was an absolute mess, his hair sticking up in different directions, and his bottom lip completely wet and glistening. He exhaled heavily as you wiped his face off, a look of bliss on his face as he stared up at you with a dopey expression.

“Yeah?” He muttered quietly, still lost in a daze of pleasure.

“Mhm,” You replied, half paying attention to him.

Your focus was elsewhere. You lunged forward, dipping to pull down his shorts and boxers in one swipe. You readjusted yourself back to the edge of the bed as you grabbed his waist and pulled you toward him. You knew you wouldn’t be satisfied unless you felt him inside you.

Art gasped as you pulled him towards you, his eyes widening as he stumbled forward, catching himself with one hand against the bed.

He stared at you with a slightly bewildered expression at your eagerness. He shuddered as he felt your warm body against his.

“Babe-” Art wanted to protest, but it was a half-hearted attempt.

“C’mon, Puppy. I want you. Don’t you want me?”

You were taking what you wanted from him, as you always did. You made sure he looked in your eyes as reached down and touched him. His length was already achingly hard for you. You stroked him for a bit before angling him against your entrance, sliding the tip of his cock along your folds. Art’s heartbeat quickened as you continued to touch him, his breathing coming out in short gasps. He stared at you with a pleading look in his eyes, desperate to please you.

“I want you so bad,” He stammered, his hips twitching in your grasp.

You gave him a darkened look before encircling his body with your limbs. Your hands at his neck and hair, your legs around his hips. You jerked forward, causing him to enter you, your center eagerly enveloping every inch of him. A gasp of relief left you, followed by mumbled dirty nothings as you felt his length plunge inside you.

A guttural moan escaped Art’s lips as he felt you pull him closer, his body completely enveloped by yours. He gripped onto your thighs, his head tipping back as he felt you tighten around him.

His mind was in a daze, your body completely wrapped around him making him shiver with pleasure.

He then leaned forward, resting his head in the crook of your neck, his voice coming out as a soft gasp.

“Oh God, babe-” His voice strained with pleasure, unable to think straight as he began to feel completely enveloped by you.

The size of him was enough to make you come undone, but in combination with his helpless blue eyes looking back at you, made you crazy.

“I know, baby. It feels good, doesn’t it?” You teased in between your panting.

You then parted your lips and captured his. The kiss was sloppy and rushed, matching the desperation of your limbs squeezing around him as he rutted himself into you. Art let out a shuddering moan as you continued to tease him, his eyes fixated on yours. Every thrust of his hips was messy and uncoordinated, desperate to have more of you, to be completely enveloped by you.

“M-more..” He begged against your lips.

“God, you are so needy,” Your words came out like an insult, but you adored his loss of control when he had you.

Your hands traveled down to his hips, finally giving some direction to the rhythm of his thrusts. Once you set the pace, you were off, quickly climbing to your peak.

“Fuck… just like that,” You breathlessly demanded as your nails left red streaks across his waist.

Art’s back arched at the feeling of your nails clawing against his skin. He gasped softly as he thrusted into you in a more steady rhythm, your words of directions going straight to his head as his thoughts continuously deteriorated. Art could feel himself getting closer to the edge as he listened to your soft moans and gasps, the feeling of your body was overwhelming.

“Babe… I’m not gonna last long-” He panted heavily.

“Just wait, I’m almost there,” You instructed, pulling his hips tighter as you writhed against him.

You could hear his thighs slapping against the wood of your bed as he continued to pound you into it, the speed was increasing and there was no stopping him. You had to find your release now, so there was time for him to pull out. Art let out a shaky gasp as he listened to you and nodded, willing himself to hold on just a bit longer for you.

“There it is. Fuck! I’m coming,” You quietly yelped as you climaxed, your vision fuzzy as you sighed heavily into his shoulder. You tried to compose yourself as quickly as possible as you anticipated his release not too long after yours. He continued to thrust into you, desperate to please you, his grip on you getting a bit tighter as he got closer to his own edge, teetering on the precipice.

“Oh God-” He groaned, unable to form words. His eyes were fixated on you, watching you fall apart, and it was almost enough to send him over the edge himself.

Before he could finish inside you, you shifted your hips, slipping him right out and onto your stomach. Thick, white ropes escaped him and fell onto your waist. Your eyes sparkled a bit to see the amount you were able to draw from him.

“Such a good boy,” You purred.

Art’s body went stiff as he felt his release all over your stomach. His legs were shaking as he leaned forward, resting his weight on his forearms against the bed frame.

#art donaldson #challengers #challengers fanfic #art donaldson x reader #art donaldson fanfic

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andvys · 10 hours

Text

Dancing with our hands tied | S.H.

Chapter nineteen ⭐︎ For you, I would ruin myself, a million little times

Warnings: angst, mentions of unrequited love, mentions of loss, insecurities, allusions to depression, mentions of cheating (jancy), sad memories, fluff at the end (with Steve, yes)

Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader

Summary: You take a painful road down memory lane and it makes you question everything.

Word count: 10.4k+

⭐︎ as always a special shoutout to @hellfire--cult thanks for plotting and writing with me hehe

Series Masterlist ⭐︎ Previous Chapter

♡

“Are you ready to tell me or not?”

You look up from your plate, still chewing on the pasta that Eddie had cooked, you put down the fork and reach for your pepsi as you look at Max who stares at you with a tilted head, a knowing smile resting on her face.

You shake your head and furrow your brows at the girl, glancing at Eddie who looks just as confused as you do.

“Tell you what?”

Max picks up her garlic bread and shrugs, “about you and Steve and how you’ve been sneaking around behind everyone’s backs,” she says nonchalantly before she takes a bite.

You nearly choke on your drink, eyes growing wide, matching the ones of Eddie who seems to be just as surprised as you are, he even stopped eating.

You blink, trying to process her words.

“W-What?” Is all that you can say as you stare at the redhead, like a deer caught in headlights and with a pounding heart.

“You know, at first I thought Lucas was crazy for teasing Steve about you and making all those comments about how perfect you two are for each other, especially because Steve always seemed just as annoyed with you as you with him but then he suddenly had different reactions whenever Lucas said something about you and I noticed how red his cheeks got every time he looked at you all lovey dovey,” she holds her finger up, eyes growing wide as she pointing at you to stay quiet, “and then… and then! You both started disappearing at the same time and started whispering to each other, sitting next to each other when it’s something you wouldn’t have done before, not to mention the secret hand holding,” Max laughs, shaking her head at you.

Your eyes widen at her ‘lovey dovey’ comment, hope that has been rising in you more and more, burning warmly in your chest but Steve doesn’t look at you that way, does he?

Eddie stares at her, feeling impressed by her observations.

Just like him, you feel impressed too, shocked and a little nervous but not scared the way you would feel if it were anyone else but her. She can keep a secret and she is like a sister to you – and unfortunately, sisters always know everything and uncover secrets without a struggle.

“I don’t know how the others haven’t figured it out yet, you two are so obvious,” she snorts, picking up her fork again, she stabs her pasta onto it, “just as obvious as my mom and your uncle,” she says to Eddie who shrugs and nods in agreement, “I mean… does anyone actually believe that he’s fixing our fence? The fence is fine! … They go to Enzo’s like every Friday night, by the way.”

Eddie chuckles and takes a bite of his food, “it’s only a matter of time until you and your mom move in with us.”

You expect Max to roll her eyes at him but instead she smirks, “yeah, hope you’re ready to become my personal driver.”

“Am I not your personal driver already?” Eddie snorts. “I mean, you even got two personal drivers, didn’t you both go shopping this morning?” He asks, pointing between you.

“Yes we did, and we were very successful,” Max nods.

You aren’t surprised about Susan and Wayne, they’re truly very obvious and now you can’t help but wonder if you and Steve are the same, with the exception that you two aren’t dating… sadly.

Max looks away from Eddie, returning her gaze back to you, “so when were you gonna tell me that you and Steve are a couple?”

Eddie coughs, glancing at you sideways as he grimaces when he sees your falling expression.

“They’re not a couple,” Eddie says for you, noticing the way your eyes sadden and your lips curl downwards at his words.

Max furrows her brows, tilting her head at you and giving Eddie a look of confusion.

“What–”

“Yeah, Steve and I are not… dating.”

The past few weeks have felt like it though, it felt like there was something more between you and him, and after finding out that you have been the only girl for him these past few months, it started feeling even more like it.

Max stares at you now, eyebrows pulling up and eyes flashing with even more confusion, “but… huh?”

“They’re just having… uh… fun, Red,” Eddie chuckles awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck as he leans back in his seat, “you know… adult fun.”

You roll your eyes at his choice of words, just the way she does before she gives him a deadpan look.

“I’m not five, Eddie! I know what they’re doing but that makes no sense!”

“What doesn’t make sense?” You ask and reach for your drink again.

She looks down bewildered, dropping her fork and waving with her hands as she points at you, “Billy had fun and you know how much fun he had!”

You chuckle and nod.

“But he never held hands with those girls or looked at them like… like he was in love or something! He had fun and then he moved on to… the next… fun. It’s different with you and Steve though!”

A sigh falls from your lips and your shoulders slump as you lean back.

Yeah, of course it’s different with you and Steve, the difference between Billy’s fun and your fun is that he never loved any of the girls he had been with, you on the other hand, are sickly and madly in love with the guy you are having ‘fun’ with and you are pretty certain that Steve doesn’t feel the same, no matter what anyone says.

Eddie glances at you, waiting for you to say something, to tell her the truth because he knows you will, you don’t seem to feel the need to hide from Max, knowing she won’t run off to her friends and tell them all about it and risking it reaching Steve, Max isn’t like that, especially not when it comes to you.

“It’s not, Max…” You sigh, looking down at your hands.

She raises her eyebrows again, squinting her eyes at you.

“So… you’re saying it’s actually just fun?” She asks like she almost wants to chuckle in amusement.

You sigh again and raise your head again, rolling your eyes, “well… yeah… no, I– fuck… no, no it’s not just fun… not for me.”

Eddie looks at you sadly, sighing too.

“And Steve?”

You shrug, despite the hope in you, you don’t know what he feels, if he even feels anything for you.

“It’s just… fun… for him?” You mumble, flinching at your own words.

“Uh… is it?” Max mumbles, not looking or sounding convinced.

“It’s what he said,” Eddie shrugs, rolling his eyes when he thinks back to the night he confronted you both, “and he seemed pretty set on it, he said it just that and nothing more when I found out about it.”

“Mhm.” You nod, hiding your face as you tilt your head down again, not wanting to show more feelings than necessary. “Can we talk about something else now, please?”

Eddie nods, “sure–”

“No,” Max shakes her head, “I wanna talk about this!”

“My relationship with Steve isn’t appropriate to discuss with a teenager–”

“Oh, so there is a relationship,” Max interrupts you, giving you a smug smirk.

“No, there isn’t, you know what I mean!”

She chuckles and crosses her arms over her chest, continuing to stare at you.

“So… Do you love him then?”

Your eyeroll is enough of an answer to that question.

“I knew it,” she murmurs under her breath, “and what about him, you think he doesn’t feel the same?” She asks, thinking that her own question sounds absurd, she saw the way Steve looked at you, multiple times already.

“I know he doesn’t,” you shrug.

“Why not?”

“Because he hated me, Max–”

“Yeah, he obviously hated you so so much, that’s why you’re holding hands now and kissing every time you think no one’s watching! I don’t know about you but I wouldn’t hold hands and kiss my enemy… oh! Or look at them with lovesick smiles and everything!”

You sigh again, tilting your head back as you look up at the ceiling.

This isn’t good for you, it really isn’t, you don’t need to be fed with more delusions.

“I think he feels the same, it’s pretty clear!”

“If it’s so clear then why isn’t it being talked about?” Eddie retorts, not feeling convinced of Max’s words, “why didn’t he say anything to change their relationship yet? I mean, he had no issue talking to his ex-girlfriend about his feelings for her when he knew she was with someone else! Oh and by the way, Nancy cheated on him and left him for someone else and he still confessed his feelings for her again… years later, he knew he would look like an absolute fool – which he did but that didn’t stop him! So what should stop him now, hm? He’s got nothing to lose with her!” Eddie points at you, “she never hurt him, she has no one else that he has to compete against, she fucking loves him! So him confessing his feelings for her wouldn’t ruin anything like it would have with Nancy or Jonathan if they reacted badly to his stupid confession!”

You close your eyes and take a deep breath, ignoring the stinging in your heart.

You knew all about his love confession to Nancy – their conversation in the RV was only the first step towards it. You remember the jealousy you felt when he told her about his dream, about the kids and the future he always wished for, you knew who he saw by his side when he talked about it all. To find out that he confessed his love to her in the Upside Down made you feel even worse, especially when you were still recovering from all your injuries. Robin rambled away about it and told you every detail, you didn’t even ask for.

Eddie’s words make your heart ache yet again, you know he is right, but they kill your hope a little and you are holding onto it so tightly.

Max, on the other hand, refuses to agree with him, she squints her eyes at him, leaning closer to the table, “maybe he is scared, Eddie? Have you thought of that? I mean, the whole thing with Nancy was… a heat of the moment kind of thing, there was literally nothing between them but there is something between them!” She argues, pointing at you.

“I have thought about it,” Eddie nods, “but if I feel like I might lose someone I love for not saying anything to them, I damn right would do something!”

“I love him, Eddie,” you mumble, your cheeks heating up at your vulnerable confession in front of Max, “but I never plan on telling him how I feel, so…”

Max groans at your words and rolls her eyes, “two idiots, I swear to god, I bet Steve is feeling and saying the same shit to whoever else knows.”

“Robin,” Eddie nods at her.

Robin, yeah.

Robin who is suddenly not as fond of you as she was before, rolling her eyes and scoffing at you every chance she gets, irritating you a little more every time you’re around her now. You considered her a close friend before she suddenly turned on you and started acting weirdly towards you. You don’t know what her deal is but you suspect that she minds your presence around her best friend, fearing that you might ‘steal’ him from her because he is spending less time with her and more with you – as though she wasn’t the first to ditch him to be with Vickie.

“Great!” Max shrugs, “then why don’t you talk to her, try to get information out of her… since you two are accomplices?”

Your eyes widen and you shake your head quickly, turning to Eddie in panic, “please don’t! Don’t talk to Robin, Eddie! She’s gonna tell Steve and if he doesn’t feel the same then…”

Eddie shakes his head at you, not needing you to finish the sentence. He reaches his hand out to you and squeezes your shoulder reassuringly, “I won’t, don’t worry,” he sighs, looking at you with sympathy in his eyes. He knows how deep your feelings are for Steve, how much you love him and how long you have loved him for already and now that you somewhat have him, you try to do everything to keep him, even when you are breaking your own heart in the process.

He isn’t fond of this affair because he has an idea of how it will end and he fears that day, knowing what it will do to you but he can’t do anything to change it, he can’t save you from heartbreak, knowing it will happen sooner or later.

You slump back in your seat, feeling pathetic for feeling this way, for holding on so desperately when there is only a small chance that there might be something and even that chance isn’t enough for you to go and find out the truth, not even when hope lingers in you after all the sweet moments you had with him.

Max looks at you in a way her brother once did, when he found out the truth and realized just how deep your feelings were, back then already.

You remember how the look in his eyes went from shock to confusion to sadness and sympathy.

And you remember how awkward and embarrassed you had felt that night.

It was raining outside, the windows were fogged and the smell of sex lingered in the room, you never knew what people meant by it when they mentioned that smell until that night. Your forehead was coated with sweat, your cheeks were glowing and feeling hot, your skin smelled like him, like his cologne and his aftershave, and your body felt different, not in a bad way, just in a foreign one.

You held the sheets tightly against your chest and looked out the window, watching as the rain paddled down the glass, a smile tugged at your lips and your chest wasn’t filled with sadness for once.

“Hey,” Billy said and pulled your attention back to him, “give me a smile.”

You turned your head to look at him, a giggle fell from your lips when you noticed the polaroid camera in his hands, his eyes were squinted and a smirk lingered on his face.

“Seriously?”

He took a picture of you before you reached forward and swatted the camera out of your face.

Billy leaned back from you and held the camera away so you couldn’t reach it, he laughed at the bashful expression on your face.

“Need a picture of your special first time,” he joked and laughed again when you rolled your eyes at him and blushed.

He took the picture out and started shaking it for reveal. He leaned back against your pillows and reached for his beer, drinking it while staring at you.

“Well, we are not doing that again,” he said and you knew that it would’ve offended many other girls, but not you, because you felt the same.

“Yeah, it didn’t feel right, did it?” You scrunched your nose.

“Not at all,” Billy laughed before his face grew serious as his eyes roamed your face, “do you feel alright?” He asked in concern because he noticed how distant you looked, like your mind was somewhere else or with someone else.

He straightened up and furrowed his brows at you, “who are you thinking about?”

You felt caught and you felt ashamed.

You never admitted your feelings for Steve to anyone, they didn’t even make sense so how could you even begin to describe them?

You looked down and closed your eyes, you pulled your brows together as though in pain and it only made him more curious.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Why not?” Billy asked and dropped the polaroid camera and the picture on the mattress beside him. He placed the beer back on the nightstand and grabbed his pack of cigarettes instead, “is he ugly?”

His question made you snort, you opened your eyes again and looked at his serious face.

“No, he is not ugly, not in the slightest.”

His lips curled downwards for a moment as he nodded, “do I know him?” He asked before he placed a cigarette between his lips.

You only gave him a look and that was enough to confirm his question.

He hummed and kept staring at you with a curious look on his face, he lit up his cigarette and threw the lighter on the nightstand, taking a long drag before he blew the smoke out.

“I do, huh?” He chuckled and squinted his eyes at you, “are you gonna tell me or are you gonna let me guess?”

You smirked and shrugged at him, you held the blanket tighter against your chest and reached for the camera beside him, “guess, Billy,” you teased him as though your heart didn’t start pounding from all the nervousness inside of you.

“Jesus,” he sighed in annoyance, “is he popular or a loser?”

You shrugged and squinted your eye as you brought the camera up to your face and wasted no second to take a picture of him too, he didn’t seem to mind, not like you did.

He started saying names, random names of guys you weren’t even sure went to Hawkins High. You kept shaking your head and saying no, you felt surprised that Steve’s name hadn't left his lips yet.

“Huh, it’s not the drug dealer is it? What’s his name again?”

“Uh… You mean Eddie?”

He nodded and pointed his finger at you, “yeah, him.”

You shook your head, “no, he’s cute but no, he’s not really my type,” you mumbled and sighed, “probably would’ve been better if it was someone like him, he’s nice, at least.”

He hummed and stared at you, he fell quiet for a while and his face grew serious after a few minutes, then his eyes widened and he cursed under his breath.

“Fuck… girl, please don’t tell me that it’s King Steve.”

Your breath hitched in your throat and your face started burning beneath his gaze, you couldn’t stand to look into his eyes any longer so you broke eye contact and looked down at your hands in your covered lap.

“Shit…” He sighed and slumped back, looking at you in disbelief, like you had fallen in love with his arch nemesis.

“I know,” you mumbled in annoyance because you knew what he was about to say, “you don’t have to tell me how stupid I am, I already know that.”

Billy stayed quiet for a moment and stared at the pained expression on your face. Yeah, he was about to say something stupid about Steve, about his stupid hair and your feelings for him but when he looked closer – and he knew you pretty well at that point, he could see just how much pain lingered behind your eyes, how glassy they got and how your bottom lip wobbled just the slightest bit.

He was never the best with words and he certainly was never someone to give comfort, he didn’t even know how to, no one ever comforted him, only you did.

He bit his tongue and swallowed the bitter words that were about to leave his lips.

He opened his mouth but shut it again when he saw you wiping away a tear.

Billy sighed and ran a hand through his mullet, he pinched the bridge of his nose and rolled his eyes at the thought of the jock.

“It’s pretty serious isn’t it?”

You only nodded and said nothing.

“So… you’re like in love with him or some shit?”

“I guess so,” you whispered even though you knew for certain. “Feels like it’s tearing my heart apart or something every time I see him, every time he says something dumb to me.”

“How…?” He asked and sighed again, “shit, I knew you liked him, you wouldn’t have defended him every chance you got but I thought you were just being nice to that fucker… Jesus…”

You shook your head again and slowly looked up at your best friend, “I can’t give you an answer, Billy. I don’t know how it happened, it just… happened. That’s gonna sound so cheesy but… when I first saw him I just… I felt safe and comfortable… happy. He smiled at me when he passed me in the hallway and I just – I don’t know, I can’t explain this feeling and it doesn’t matter anyways, he turned out to be a dick who hates my guts so… I’ll get over these feelings someday.”

Billy didn’t believe your words and you didn’t either.

You have loved him at first sight and that never changed or lessened, your feelings kept getting worse and worse and it made no sense because he kept treating you badly.

You were infatuated with him, bewitched.

You expected Billy to judge you but he didn’t, you thought he would say bad things about Steve but he never did, at least not when it came to you and your feelings for him.

If anything, Billy encouraged you to act on your feelings, to get closer to him, to make a move and try.

And you did, but it only made everything worse.

And now, you stare at his sister and watch as she tries to do the same.

It went sideways the first time and you fear that it won’t go any different this time – yes, things have changed, you and Steve are something now, something you would have never seen coming a year before, especially after what happened when you did try to make a move on him. You just can not find it in yourself to even try, to gather all your confidence and use the sliver of hope to confess to him in hopes that he could feel the same, that you could be something more than what you are now.

You can feel that things have shifted into a different direction, the softness in his eyes, his gentle touches and acts of affection are proof of that and still, you fear rejection and losing this because this thing between you is just too fragile, too easy to break and ruin.

It’s not long ago that Steve couldn’t even bare to look at you without rolling his eyes or scoffing some cold words at you and you try not to think of them, to leave things in the past, to not go over his hurtful words again and again but something inside of you seems to manifest all the saddening and painful words your poor heart was attacked with in the past and you can’t fight off those memories, you try to but you can’t and it saddens you even more because the past few weeks with Steve, have been nothing but heavenly to you.

You woke up in his arms every morning, he held you through the night, woke you with kisses and cooked you breakfast, he held your hand and treated you as if you were his, like you were his girlfriend and he your boyfriend – you got a taste of something you always craved and longed for and that should bring you peace, it really should but he is showing you, giving you something that you know he will take away again when the time comes.

When you step into your house after dropping Max off at El’s, you make your way up to your bedroom and open your closet, looking for something comfortable to change into, when the navy blue color flashes in your peripheral vision. You grab a pair of your sleeping shorts and a random shirt of Steve’s, trying to ignore the dress that practically stares at you, forcing you to recall one of your worst memories.

You clutch your clean clothes to your chest and take a look at the pretty sundress you bought at the GAP store when Starcourt mall was still intact. You reach out to touch it, pinching the thin material between your thumb and your pointer finger, a sad smile tugs at your lip when you think back to the day you bought it – just to look pretty for him.

Your best friend kept encouraging you, filling you with hope that you could have a chance with Steve, that he wouldn’t say no to you if you tried to make a move, if you tried to ask him out, if you went after your feelings. Week after week had passed and Billy forced confidence onto you and pushed you towards a guy he didn’t even like.

You kept denying his words, you knew you had no chance with him, not even after you graduated from high school, not even after Steve had changed and his mean words became less harsh.

And yet, a part of you listened to Billy, that naive and hopeful part of you that really wanted her crush to like her back and give her the chance she always wanted.

You bought a pretty dress, you got your hair done and did your makeup, lighter and girlier than usual, you put on your favorite perfume and jewelry and you decided to give it a try – you shouldn’t have, you should’ve listened to your brain and not your heart.

The mall was bustling with people, kids were running around the water fountain, a group of young girls rushed past you, giggling in excitement as they carried their many shopping bags, you were standing in front of Scoops Ahoy, with your cheeks burning and your heart racing.

In all honesty, you had no idea what you were doing, you came up with no plan before you came here, you just woke up that morning and decided that Billy was right, that you could take a chance and go after what you wanted – you had nothing to lose, except for your dignity. Besides, you were no longer in school, if things went wrong, you could easily avoid him.

You had taken a look inside, only a few teenagers sat by the window, it wasn’t crowded, not in the slightest. You saw him, he was standing behind the counter with his back turned to you as he was talking to his co-worker who spoke to him through the small window between them.

Your heart skipped a beat when he turned to the side, a smile lingered on his face as he nodded along to the music that played on the radio.

You could have still turned back, you could have still left without being seen, without having made a fool of yourself. But you didn’t, you didn’t turn around, you didn’t change your mind, you walked into your own demise.

You took a deep breath and walked up to the counter, you twisted the ring on your finger and focused on him. He looked so good, even in his silly uniform, he looked so pretty. His sailor hat was laying on the counter and he was twisting the ice cream scooper in his hand, he only turned around when his co-worker, Robin, nudged her chin at you before she turned her back to him and disappeared further into the room.

You blinked and breathed heavily as you realized that you didn’t even know what to say, you didn’t prepare for this, you were never good with words or conversing with boys, you didn’t know how to flirt – well, you did, Billy taught you, but you had never used your newly learned skill before.

And when Steve turned around to face, it was too late to think of what to say, anyways.

“Ahoy–” his cheerful words cut short and the smile on his face fell when he saw you, “oh, it’s you.”

That should have been enough to change your mind, to make you turn back and run the other way.

“Hi Steve.”

Steve’s shoulders slumped and he slid his scooper back into place, he put his hands on the counter and sighed.

“Blondie,” he nodded.

You were too nervous to see the way he looked at you, the way his eyes roamed your face and your styled hair, your glowing skin and your pretty dress, the way his cheeks changed color as he kept staring at you.

“What can I get for you?” He asked and cleared his throat as he gestured to the many ice cream flavors.

You shifted and tilted your head to the side, your hair fell from your shoulder and down your back. He looked again, at your exposed skin, at the dainty chain around your neck.

“I uh… I’m… I don’t know yet,” you stuttered and felt yourself growing more nervous than before.

Steve sighed and looked away from you, “of course,” he murmured under his breath.

Your cheeks burned hotly, your eyes felt heavy and you looked down as you already felt the regret rushing through your body. You wanted to say something, anything, but all your words were caught in your throat, everything you would’ve said if he liked you a little more were stuck and frozen.

You cleared your throat and took a deep breath, you looked at his face and wondered why you even let Billy encourage you and talk you into doing this. The few ‘nice’ interactions you had with Steve meant nothing. The smile he wore on his lips before could never be directed at you, the soft look in his hazel eyes disappeared the moment he saw you, the tone in his voice changed in an instant.

“How are you…?” You asked, cringing at yourself, at the question, at the shakiness in your voice.

He looked back at you and raised his eyebrows, an unamused chuckle fell from his lips.

“What do you want?” He asked and shrugged at you, “we’re out of high school, we don’t have to see each other anymore and I know you’re not here for ice cream, you usually don’t have an issue making a decision, so why are you here, Blondie?”

You could not help but draw back as a cold shudder ran down your spine, you blinked and looked down.

You missed the look of guilt that flashed in his eyes when he watched you step back and you closed your eyes for a moment, your brows scrunched together as though in pain.

He was always this way, you knew what you were stepping into, you knew how he would react and you couldn’t blame him, you weren’t exactly nice to him in school and snapped back at him every time he threw a rude comment at you.

You swallowed and took a deep breath, you looked back up at him, at the hazel eyes you always loved so much.

Steve huffed and he took a deep breath, he stared at you intensely and you didn’t know what it meant, a part of you thought that it was his hatred, the other was foolishly hopeful.

“Yeah… I know but I just… I thought that maybe we could,” you paused as your heart felt as though it was about to tear from your chest any moment. He looked at you so intensely, he made you feel so small beneath his gaze.

“We could what?” He asked a little too harshly and made you cower back.

“This was a bad idea,” you whispered to yourself and took another step back, “I’m sorry I just…”

“What’s up with you?” Steve mumbled and furrowed his brows at you, confused at the side of you he never met before. “Did you miss being annoying so much that you had to come bother me at work, Blondie?”

You heard the teasing in his voice, you saw the sliver of amusement in his eyes but you really only focused on the way your heart clenched in pain and how regret took on full control.

You rolled your eyes, not at him but at yourself, at your foolishness.

Of course he doesn’t want to see you, why would he?

He never liked you and he certainly wouldn’t start now, he would probably laugh into your face if you asked for what you came for – a date.

Your cheeks were nearly hurting from all the blushing, your heart was skipping and pounding, your hands felt clammy. You never felt the need to cry in front of him, you never felt vulnerable around him because your walls were always high up and guarded by a second layer, now you came without protection and decided to let yourself be vulnerable for once, only to feel like breaking down from the embarrassment that was gnawing at you.

“Cat got your tongue? That’s new…” He chuckled and stared you down still, eyebrows still furrowed and lips pursed. His hardened expression fell a little and something else took over, something you couldn’t read. “Did someone stand you up?”

Steve wasn’t used to your silence so you weren’t surprised about the confusion on his face. You looked at him again and caught him eyeing you up and down, his eyes lingered on your dress for longer than necessary.

His question went unanswered and he grew frustrated with you.

“Can’t blame them if they did,” he mumbled, throwing daggers at your heart.

That stung.

Normally his words would’ve angered you and you would’ve shot back straight away, despite your feelings for him, you wouldn’t have kept quiet or struggled to say something back but not today, today you let him hurt you – deep down you knew this would happen, this was always how you interacted, he said something mean and then you would too. His words were nothing new and yet they cut deep.

You swallowed hard and dug your nails into your palms, your breathing quickened and you knew you had to get out of here but something kept you standing, you felt as though you were frozen.

Steve coughed awkwardly and looked away for a moment, he grabbed his scooper again, “so… wanna eat your feelings or what?” He asked and pointed at the many flavors, eyes back on you.

“No–”

“Hi, Steve!”

You nearly flinched at the high pitched voice and had to hold back the eyeroll when you saw the girl next to you, who didn’t bother to hide the dirty looks she gave you before she returned her attention back to him, flashing him a sickly sweet smile that made his eyes light up.

The girl used to be on the cheer team, very popular and gossipy, unkind and one of the most unpleasant people you have met – and she usually spends her Saturday nights in Billy’s sheets.

Steve’s eyes were no longer on you, instead they were stuck on the pretty girl beside you, he eyed her up and down, not with distaste or annoyance but with interest and a smirk on his lips.

“Hey, how are you?” He asked and leaned against the counter, a flirty look crossed his face, “you look amazing, Olivia.”

She giggled and twirled her hair around her finger, she licked her lips as she eyed him like she was hungry.

“So do you.”

Steve smirked at her and chuckled softly.

At that point, you didn’t know what you felt because your sadness ran so deep, you didn’t have it in yourself to feel jealous anymore.

You just felt like a fool.

And you felt angry, at yourself and at him for being so horrible to you. Olivia’s giggles did nothing to make you feel less horrible, like nails on chalkboard her voice was irritating you in the worst way possible, so before leaving, you turned towards her and when she met your gaze with a fake smile, you matched the look on her face.

“Wouldn’t waste your time here, Olivia,” you said her name, mockingly and looked her up and down, not feeling jealous over the ugly sandals or the green skirt she was wearing. “He only flirts to pass time. Besides, isn’t that your boyfriend waiting for you?” You asked and tilted your head at the guy in front of the store, he was already glaring at Steve.

Olivia clenched her jaw and glared at you, huffing in annoyance which gave you a little satisfaction.

“Better not leave him waiting or someone might tell him what or who you do every Saturday night.”

Her pale face grew even… paler and you couldn’t even bite back the smirk, despite the blow that was just delivered to your heart.

Steve raised his eyebrows as he looked between you, he saw the way you blinked, fastly, he saw how glassy your eyes were despite the look on your face.

You turned back to him and looked at him with a straight face, “you usually don’t mind sharing your girls though, do you? So… go nuts,” you shrugged before you turned around and walked away from him, not planning to look back.

You should have, you should have looked back because then you would’ve seen the guilt in his eyes, the regret that crossed his features, the tension that slipped off his shoulders and the disinterest that took over for the girl in front of him. The sadness that flashed in his eyes for missing an opportunity, for letting you go like this.

But you didn’t, you kept going and you rushed back out into the bustling mall, you blinked away the tears and made your way back home. You tore the dress off your skin the moment you stepped into your room.

And you never wore it again.

You roll your eyes at yourself for feeling pain for the girl you were a year before, for still hurting because of the things he said to you, for the way he looked at you, for the way he flirted with a different girl in front of you.

The past doesn’t matter, it shouldn’t matter, especially not now, not anymore – not after what you have gone through together, not after he changed, not after he started treating you differently, not after all the nights and mornings you have spent with each other, not after all the gentle touches, not after the way he kissed you and held you close that one night, not after he called you late at night just to hear your voice.

He is different now, you are different now, you aren’t the teenagers you were a year back.

The past shouldn’t hurt.

You slam the closet door shut and walk out of your room and into the bathroom, you start the shower, letting the water warm up while you take off your clothes. You feel frustration bubbling inside of you, the conversation with Max and her encouraging words triggered all the memories that you refused to think about in these past few months.

The day at Scoops Ahoy made you sad and angry, it made you want to never see him again, you avoided the mall after that day and you didn’t see much of him after. You hated yourself for hoping, for going after your feelings, for believing that you could have a chance after Billy’s encouragement – Billy who pushed you away only a week later, with harsh words and a mean look on his face, he pushed you away when you needed him the most and you felt alone again, so alone. At that time, you didn’t understand why he did it, why he didn’t want you in his life anymore, you didn’t know that he was just trying to protect you from the upside down, from himself.

And then he died and you lost yourself completely.

You drowned your sorrows in alcohol and kissed the lips of strangers, you let them touch you in hopes that you would feel something, you woke up in their beds and hated yourself after because no matter how good they were to you, how nice the conversations went, how much they made you laugh, how nice they made you feel, they couldn’t make you forget about the friend you lost, they couldn’t make you forget about him, they couldn’t give you what you wanted, what you needed, what you longed for.

You searched for glimpses of Steve in every man you kissed and you hated yourself for it because you wondered why you even felt that way for someone who couldn’t even stand you, who hated you with all his being.

What made you fall in love with him?

What tied you to him the way it did?

Because he never gave you a reason to fall in love with him back then, he treated you unkindly from the moment you met and yet you couldn’t help your feelings, you couldn’t help but adore him, you couldn’t help but admire him.

You even felt your own heart break when you found out about what Nancy did to him, how she broke his heart so carelessly, how she cheated on him with her friend.

And you felt it break even more when he still wanted her, even after everything she did to him, he loved hard, just like you did, like you do. No matter what she did to him, he still loved her.

And now, you can’t help but ask yourself the question that you have always avoided.

Does he still have feelings for her?

You wonder if he still wants her, if he still wishes for a future with her, if she is still the one he craves by his side.

He doesn’t look at her the way he used to, not anymore, he doesn’t seem sad around her the way he did after she rejected him and yet, you still wonder, if you are just someone he passes time with while he hopes that she might change her mind in the future. If you are the person he finds comfort in because he can feel that you love him the way she never did.

Are you the replacement? The filler?

You feel yourself crashing, the water feels hot on your skin but you feel the shudder running down your spine, the goosebumps that rise on your skin make you shiver, your throat tightens and your eyes blur with tears as your heart clenches in your chest.

You wipe your tears in anger even though your whole face is wet from the water pouring down on you, you turn off the water and open the curtain in anger, you reach for your towel and wrap it around your body.

You wipe the fog off the mirror and look at your reflection, at the marks on your neck, at the tears running down your cheeks.

Are you stupid for crying when you knew exactly what you were signing up for?

You always knew what this was to him and you were satisfied with it because you just wanted him, no matter how, you wanted him and you got him.

But you can’t stop your heart from aching because somehow, you fell even harder for him and you can’t stop from hurting when you think about what you are to him and what you might never be.

Just sex.

A friend… nothing more than a friend, that’s what he said, you are just a friend.

The confidence that only started growing inside of you not too long ago begins to crumble and you don’t know how to stop it from falling apart.

You close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, trying to calm your racing heart and the thoughts that drive you mad. You take a look around, at the things he left in your bathroom, his toothbrush next to yours, his body wash and shampoo in your shower, his Farrah Fawcett hairspray that no one can know about.

Would all this be here if you didn’t mean something to him?

Would he have made space in one of his drawers just for your stuff if this meant nothing?

Would he have let you in if he still wanted someone else?

Does he even still want someone else?

You huff in annoyance for letting yourself fall into this spiral of overthinking. You feel as though all these questions come to haunt you for pushing them away all these weeks and now you feel a headache coming and you grow irritated with yourself and with your insecurities.

You shut them down as best as you can and busy yourself with other things, you moisturize your skin and blow dry your hair. You put on your fresh clothes and comb through your hair before you leave the bathroom, it’s much darker in the hallway than expected, the grayish clouds hide the sun and the sound of thunder rumbles in the far distance, drops of rain already paint your windows.

Goosebumps rise on your skin and an unsettling feeling sinks into the pit of your stomach. You feel the cold wind on your exposed skin from the open window in your bedroom, you make your way inside, pushing the blowing curtains away as you reach forward to shut the window.

Lightning surges through the sky, deep purple colors flash in the darkening clouds far away. You would’ve felt your heart dropping by now if you didn’t notice the burgundy car parked in your driveway, the door opens and he steps out, a second later, a brown paper bag in his hand and something tucked beneath his arm, he shuts the door and locks it, wasting no time to find shelter under the roof on your porch as it starts raining harder.

Instead of dropping, your heart skips a beat, forgetting all about the pain it just felt from the saddening thoughts in your mind.

Through all your overthinking and pondering, you forgot that he was coming over.

You shut the window and rush downstairs, opening the door as he rings the doorbell for a second time. A frown lingers on his face but it disappears when his eyes lock with yours as soon as you open the door and a smile tugs at his lips instead.

“Hey Blondie,” he breathes and rushes inside when you step aside to let him in, “looks like the end of the world out there.”

“Hi…”

You close the door and lock it before you turn around to face him.

Steve kicks off his shoes and throws the movie tapes that were tucked beneath his arm on the counter where you keep your keys and sunglasses, he puts his keys into the little bowl and then he steps towards you and reaches for your hand, he pulls you towards him and takes you by surprise when he leans down and smacks his lips against yours, kissing you shortly. Greeting you with a kiss, something he had never done before.

Your eyes widen a little and your throat tightens for a different reason now, you stare at him, unable to hide the surprised look on your face.

And Steve, he furrows his brows and his smile falls a little, not because of your widened eyes but because of the glassiness in them, he frowns as worry swirls in his chest.

“Hey,” he murmurs and lets go of your hand to cup the side of your face, letting his thumb linger on your cheek, “is everything okay?”

You blink.

Your heart jumps at his action, at the question, at the concern in his soft brown eyes. You breathe in deeply, you open and close your mouth a few times, unable to find the right words.

You didn’t cry all that much, it’s not so visible on your face, is it?

“Did something happen?” He asks, a little softer this time.

You shake your head, “n-no, I’m fine, just tired, I’m probably coming down with something…” You lie.

“In the summer?”

You force a smile and look down, shrugging, “guess I’m not that strong…”

“Well, then let me take care of you,” he whispers and caresses your cheek.

You wonder if he knows what he does to you with such words and actions, you sometimes wish he knew that your heart leaps every time he does such things, maybe then he would take pity on you and not fill you with so much hope, even in your worst moments.

You nod at him and let him take your hand back in his, he gives you a sweet smile that nearly makes you crumble.

“So how was your day?” Steve asks as he tugs you along with him and leads you into your kitchen.

You swallow the lump in your throat and shrug, “good, I went shopping with Max and then we ate lunch with Eddie.”

Steve smiles at that, he places the brown paper bag on the kitchen table and turns to face you.

The soft look in his eyes and the smile on his lips makes you feel guilty for the thoughts that rushed through your mind just moments before. This side of him is the only one you have known in the past few weeks, the gentle and sweet side you never thought you’d ever get to see.

“I got us dinner, burgers and fries but I got the fancy ones from Enzo’s,” he chuckles and lets go of your hand, stepping away from you and towards the sink. “Did you find anything?” He asks as he runs the water and uses the hand soap you always leave in your kitchen to wash his hands.

You furrow your brows at his question, feeling a little lost and confused.

“Hm?”

“When you went shopping.”

“Oh.” You nod your head, you went back to the jewelry store to look for new rings and the necklace you fell in love with but it was already gone, it would’ve looked pretty with the dress you picked out for Joyce’s and Hopper’s wedding. “Yeah, I finally got a dress for the wedding… oh and shoes… and makeup.”

Steve smiles fondly when he turns back to you, “what color is your dress?”

“Uh, it’s black,” you say and walk over to the fridge to grab a drink for you both, “sounds boring, right? But it’s really pretty and I got some pink heels to go with it.”

“It doesn’t sound boring,” he shakes his head at you and carries two plates to the kitchen table, “besides, you look gorgeous in anything.”

You freeze.

Your eyes grow wide and your cheeks start burning.

Gorgeous?

He surely never called you that before, especially not after greeting you with a kiss on your lips.

“T-Thanks, Steve.”

He hums in response and you look back at him to see him placing the food on the plates, putting more fries on yours than on his. His brows are pulled together in concentration, his lips pressed together, his hair looks a little messed up from the wind but he looks so cute like this.

And you can’t help but think of how intimate this all is, him kissing you after walking in, him asking you about your day and the color of your dress, him plating your dinner.

You can’t help but hate yourself for all the overthinking and reminiscing of the things that happened in the past.

You close the fridge with a sigh and make your way back to the table, placing the coke in front of his plate.

“Thanks, Honey.”

You give him a smile and sit down across from him, looking down at the delicious food in front of you, “I’m horrible, you always cook for us or order something and I never do anything.”

Steve shakes his head, glaring at you, “you’re not horrible and that’s not true, you cooked breakfast and dinner before.”

You pop open your soda can, “yeah, I made french toast and sandwiches.”

“Yeah and it was amazing, now shut up and eat your dinner, kid,” he says playfully, his eyes glinting with amusement when you laugh.

You push your hair out of your face and pick up the burger, unaware of the fond smile that tugs at his lips as he watches you take a bite. His eyes roam your face, your eyes are a little red and he can’t help but think that you lied to him about feeling sick, you look fine, you just look a little… sad and it makes him feel upset because he knows that you won’t talk about it, especially not with him but he wants to be there for you, he wants to give you a shoulder to cry on, to lean on, he wants to give you comfort.

He looks down at the shirt on your body and when he recognizes it, his eyes lighten up and warmth blooms in his chest, it’s his shirt.

He bites back the smile as he looks down and starts eating too, welcoming the comfortable silence between you as the rain paddles down the windows, the thunder still crashing somewhere, far away.

You flinch every time a loud crash booms through the sky, it’s nothing new to him, he noticed it the very first time it happened. Every time the sky turns a little darker and the wind picks up, you fidget and get anxious. He wonders if it’s a fear you have taken with you from the upside down or if it is something that accompanied you before, he never dared to ask before.

Every time he showed up during a storm, your eyes were filled with fear and your hands were shaking. You would relax and calm down a few minutes after his arrival, his presence seems comforting to you and it’s why he rushes to get to you every time he sees the dark clouds and hears the thunder.

“Hey Blondie?”

You look up at him through your lashes and raise your eyebrows, “yes?”

“Can I ask you something?”

You put down your burger and reach for your drink, nodding at him.

“Have you always been afraid of storms?”

You seem to be taken aback as you stare at him and blink, not moving or saying anything just yet and he fears that he crossed a line.

“I just, I noticed that you flinch at every crash.”

You always tried to hide your reactions, not wanting to seem scared or weak, and usually no one ever noticed things about you that you didn’t want them to see but Steve seems to see right through you.

His hazel eyes aren’t filled with judgment or amusement, just with curiosity and… a hint of concern?

You take a sip of your drink and sit back, relaxing your shoulders as you look into his eyes.

“Yeah, I just, I guess it got stuck with me from when I was a kid,” you chuckle and roll your eyes, “I know, embarrassing right?”

He shakes his head and frowns, “no, not at all.”

“Honestly, it wasn’t even that bad when I was a kid, it got worse when I was a teen. My parents would go on these business trips sometimes and trusted my sister to look after me but she used those opportunities to go hang out with friends or go to parties or whatever else she was doing,” you explain, not looking away from him, “and I hated being alone, it probably didn’t help that I watched horror movies every time I was alone.”

Steve chuckles at that, though he can’t help but feel sad for you.

His parents left too, hell, they still do. To know that you were in a similar situation as him when you were younger fills him with regret, knowing that he could have been there for you and you for him, if he just wasn’t such a dick to you.

“I just always got so anxious whenever I heard the howling wind and the loud thunder, it felt like the fear paralyzed me in a way… I don’t know, does that even make sense?”

Steve nods, “yeah, yeah it makes sense.”

But now he wonders how the hell you jumped into the water to save him, after everything that you had been told about the upside down, about the storms, about the monsters, you still jumped into the water when he was pulled under. You knew what was waiting for you on the other side and you still did it.

“B-But how… I… the upside down was filled with storms?”

You would’ve jumped into a hurricane if it meant saving his life.

“I wasn’t going to prioritize my fears over your life, Steve.”

Steve feels a little stunned, he knows how paralyzing fears can get, how they can hold you back from everything, but you, you didn’t care about your fears, about yourself, knowing that it could’ve ended badly for you down there, you cared more for him than you did for yourself, even when he was nothing but an asshole to you who treated you like shit.

If he knew you, the real you, he wouldn’t have been so harsh to you, he wouldn’t have been so… cold. He would have never said a single bad word to you but he thought you were cruel and he thought you hated him so he gave you a side of him that didn’t even exist, it was an act, nothing more, nothing less and he regrets it more than anything.

He regrets every word he said to you before this. And he feels as though he doesn’t deserve this, you, not even in this way, not after everything he said to you and about you.

He wants nothing more than to take it all back, to make it up to you.

And as you sit there in front of him, with red rimmed eyes that prove that you have cried before he came here, he wants nothing more than to pull you into his arms and apologize, over and over again.

But instead of doing that and risking making you uncomfortable, he slides his plate closer to you and changes seats so he is right next to you, he ignores the confused look you give him and the question you were gonna ask before he grabs your face and kisses you, making you gasp in surprise.

You melt into the kiss quickly, despite the confusion that lingers in you. You place your palm on the side of his neck and kiss him back softly.

And just like that, your worries and your anxious thoughts fade away into nothing, his touch, his kisses, he makes you forget about all the sadness that gnawed at you before, for a moment, they don’t matter and they won’t be back till later.

For a moment, you’re allowed to feel hopeful and confident again.

When his hand finds your waist and his lips move slowly and softly with yours, when he hums into the kiss and pulls you closer, when he makes you feel special.

Steve’s eyelashes flutter when he pulls away and opens his eyes again, smiling softly as he pecks your lips once more before he moves back, like he didn’t just steal your breath and made your heart pound wildly.

“What was that for?” You breathe.

“To calm you down from the storm,” he shrugs, chuckling at his own words.

“Why do you think a kiss would calm me down?”

“I don’t know, I read it in a magazine,” he lies and looks down at his food with rosy cheeks and a sheepish smile.

A giggle falls from your lips.

“Right,” he nods and points a finger at you, still smiling, “it’s scientifically proven that kisses help with the distraction.”

“Mhmm,” you hum and nod, “right, totally yeah.”

Instead of tears, you’re biting back a smile now, falling right back into the state you are always in when you’re around him – into bliss.

You continue eating and you ask him about his day, you push your plate towards him, sharing your fries with him once he practically inhales the ones on his plate. He keeps on talking, the whole time you sit at the kitchen table you ate your meals alone at, he tells you all the gossip he’s heard from Robin, keeping you entertained and making you giggle, making you forget about the raging storm behind you or the pain you felt before, he makes you forget about everything.

And you thought this would be like any other night you spent with him.

But it wasn’t.

Steve didn’t sleep with you that night, and you didn’t initiate it either. The storm was at full blast over your house, and Steve made sure to have the TV at full volume when watching the movies he stole. He mentioned Keith was busy trying to talk to a female customer and he didn’t even look at Steve when he shoved them down his shirt.

You laughed with him, giggled, and – are you the replacement? Are you really? Or are you actually in his heart?

The past tells you that you are the filler for the holes in his heart, but the present– the present tells you otherwise. It tells you that there might be a chance. His smile tells you that he likes spending time with you. The frown over his eyes when something happens to you tells you he is worried for you. The way he is possessive over you tells you that he considers you his.

Is it foolish to believe in the present? Is it foolish to simply forget about the past? Is it foolish you cannot and won’t let go of him? Is it foolish to simply love him, with no reason at all?

And you just know… that Billy never once said it was.

Billy who wouldn’t want you to give up. Billy who wouldn’t want you to go back into the past. Billy who would want you to keep living in the present. Billy who would still encourage you if he were here. Billy who helped you pick that dress at the GAP to shoot your shot that day at Scoops.

Billy never gave up on your love for Steve.

You shouldn’t either.

And you won’t.

♡

tagging friends and mutuals

@prettyboyeddiemunson @taintedcigs @mysticmunson @corrodedcorpses @maroon-cardigan @thecreelhouse @ibellcipem @joekeerysmoles @munsonlore @sherrylyn0628 @munson-mjstan @agirlwholovesrockstars @moon-flowerrs

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington drabble #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington angst #stranger things angst

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nanaarchy · 1 day

Text

Hey chat !!!! I'm going insane.

Ever since my first listen to TMA, I've had a huge question that NEVER got answered.

Never. Not in the whole series, not Q&As or the wiki or anything. I thought I would never find answers. I thought it would be forgotten. I thought it was a small insignificant detail and I'd have to live with never knowing the truth about it.

Now with TMAGP 19, I might finally know the answer.

Maybe. Maybe maybe. But It Could Be. And now I'm losing my mind at the implications.

((For the record, I know that the stories and worldbuilding are inherently separate - hell, there are even timeline differences in the cases I'm using as evidence. But the overlap might be important, especially when it comes to the Web.))

Spoilers for both shows below!

Its branches were exquisite, and delicate, swaying slightly from small eddies in the liquid, and they shone with every spectra. I must confess that to look upon it, one was – (sigh) filled with profound wonder at its exquisite elegance. [...] Even I, steeped in worldly matters as I am, recognized The Lord’s words to Adam, and was much dismayed at the implication. Isaac then plucked the delicate fruit with ungloved hands and held it before me. [...] The creature was taking root. Strands of its mottled brown hair were extruding downwards between the floor, seeking the dark earth below. Then, too, its back began to sprout, radiant branches unfurling and thickening before me, reaching upwards towards the sunlight with a seemingly insatiable desire. [...] I tell you here, Robert, it saw me, and it knew me. (TMAGP 19 - HARD RESET)

It was an ornate wooden thing, with a snaking pattern of lines weaving their way around towards the centre. The pattern was hypnotic and shifted as I watched it, like an optical illusion. I found my eyes following the lines towards the middle of the table, where there was nothing but a small square hole. Graham noticed me staring, and told me that interesting antique furniture was one of his few true passions. Apparently he’d found the table in a second-hand shop during his student days and fallen in love with it. It had been in pretty bad shape but he’d spent a long time and a lot of money restoring it, though he’d never been able to figure out what was supposed to go in the centre. He assumed it was a separate piece and couldn’t track it down. (MAG 3 - ACROSS THE STREET)

Re: Magnus Institute Ruins. By RedCanary on Saturday April 23 2022 12:17pm. The photos from the spelunk seem properly gone, but I did find an old wooden thing with a bunch of similar symbols on. Some kinda empty box, not really sure what for, though. Gonna see if I can get the light right for a decent pic. Edit: No dice, I’m afraid. Must be something up with my phone camera. Really not helping the whole paranoia thing either. Anyone know anything about photographic distortion? Gonna see if I can borrow my dad’s SLR tomorrow. (TMAGP 1 - FIRST SHIFT)

Adelard Dekker stood in the corner. He was straight and motionless, his lips moving rapidly, though no sound came out of them. In the centre of the room, stood a table carved from dark wood and wrapped all over with a sprawling, intricate pattern. And in front of that table was the thing that had said it was my cousin. It was long and thin, the tops of it bent against the ceiling and its stick-like limbs flailed from too many joints and elbows. Wrapped around it were thick strands of what I think was spider’s web, stretching back into the table, which I now saw pulsed along its carved channels with a sickly light. The face at the top of that gangly frame was like nothing on earth. (MAG 78 - DISTANT COUSIN)

Now... Now I get it. I get it. I finally gave an answer. Or, at least, I think we'll get a concrete answer soon. But I think I get it.

I think I get where the web table comes from. I think I know what it's made of. why it glows. why it had a hole in the middle. I think I might know how the web gained control and sentience so much faster than the other fears. and, if it still manifests in the same way in the Protocol universe, how it also quickly became "the manager" of other fears, as theories suggest.

More importantly, I think I know what was up with the mysterious tree from so, so long ago.

Now I have an answer.

Why was there an apple buried in Hill Top Road?

I opened the box and sitting inside was a single green apple. It looked fresh, shiny, with a coat of condensation like it had just been picked on a cool spring morning. I picked it up. I wasn’t going to eat it, I’m not that stupid, but more than bleeding trees or phantom burning, this confused me. As I took it out of the box, though, it began to turn. The skin turned brown and bruised and started to shrivel in my hand. Then it split. And out came spiders. Dozens, hundreds of spiders erupting from this apple that was rotting right before my eyes. I shrieked and dropped it before any of them could touch my arm. The apple fell to the ground and burst in a cloud of dust. I backed away and waited until I was sure all the spiders had left before retrieving the box. I smashed it with a crowbar, and threw the remains into a skip. (MAG 8 - BURNED OUT)

And now I have an answer. Maybe.

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steddiecameraroll · 16 hours

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I Want to Know What Love Is

ao3

Steve doesn’t know when it’ll stop hurting. Everyone says time heals all wounds. But it’s been three years and that feels like more than enough time for the Eddie-shaped wound to heal.

Why does it still hurt?

“Steve?” Robin’s quiet when she peers around the corner.

Steve’s sitting alone on their couch in the middle of the night, staring at the blank television screen, with tears slipping down his cheeks.

“You ok?” Robin slides in beside him, immediately wrapping her arms around him and tugging him in close.

“I don’t know what’s wrong.” He wipes the back of his hand across his cheek, and then hugs her closer. “I’m just feeling lonely, I guess.”

“You got me,” she tries to sound upbeat.

“I know,” he pats her arm. “Thank you.”

They sit together in silence, rocking in each other's arms. The darkness feels like a vice around Steve’s heart, squeezing him until he can’t breathe.

“I miss him,” he murmurs.

“I know,” she presses a kiss to his head. “You could probably call him. You know he’s not asleep.”

“I know but it’s not the same.”

“I’m sorry, bud.”

“I think I should’ve gone with him.”

He’s regretted letting Eddie leave for the west coast without him, pretty much from day one. But that guilt, fear, and obligation of protecting everyone still in Hawkins was too strong to let him tag along.

“You could still go.” Robin nudges his shoulder.

“He doesn’t miss me like I miss him. He’s probably fucking all kinds of groupies. Y’know, people can’t resist a rockstar.”

“Steve,” her tone is soft but sad. “Don’t do this to yourself. First, they’re not rockstars. Eddie has a day job. Second, you know he misses you. I can always hear him through the phone when he calls. The way he says your name. That man is still crazy about you.” She runs her fingers through his hair softly. “Call him.”

Steve sighs but doesn’t respond. He wants to believe her, but also can’t withstand getting his hopes up only to be devastated later.

He just needs more time.

“Eddie?”

Eddie’s pulled from his thoughts when his coworker Dale waves him down.

“Sup, man?” Eddie leans his arms along the bar, ducking his head under the hanging martini glasses.

“You think you can take my shift tomorrow? Rach has to go to the hospital. Her mom’s in for something with her heart. I gotta watch the kids.”

“Yeah, man. No problem.”

“Fuck, you’re the best. Oh my god that’s such a relief. Thanks. I’ll owe you one.”

“No problem. Hope everything is ok.” Eddie’s heart always tugs a little bit when he hears someone’s mom is sick.

“Sounds like it. They’re just keeping her to make sure.”

“Good, don’t worry about tomorrow. I got it.” Eddie slaps his palm on the shiny bar top and slides down to a new patron at the last stool. He sets a napkin in front of the man. “What can I get ya?”

It’s a quiet night in the bar. Slower than molasses quiet. He hates nights like this. Not only does it hit his pockets it gives him enough time to think. And time to think is bad for Eddie’s mental health.

He’s been in California for three years now and he’s not anywhere closer to making it big than when he showed up. The guys are getting over it. Tired of burning the candle at both ends and hearing ‘no’ at every single turn.

Plus…

He’s fucking lonely.

He has been trying so hard to get over Steve. When he first got to L.A. he was able to distract himself with a new place, a new job, a new dream, new surroundings everything, but that fizzled away quickly.

He’s avoiding the party scene. There’s a lot harder drugs being passed around than in Hawkins. And thanks to his dear old pops, he’s learned stay away from that shit. He doesn’t want to be a washed up rockstar before he even becomes a rockstar.

He pours the new customer a beer then goes back to organizing the receipts. His thumb is tapping mindlessly along to the music pumping from the jukebox, when the tune changes and he feels it in his heart.

I wanna know what love is

I want you to show me

I wanna feel what love is

I know you can show me

Fucking, Foreigner. This song always reminds him of Steve and that night he, Steve, Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, and Argyle went out to the Robinson’s farm. A few six packs, some California Grade-A purple palm tree delight, and drunken karaoke style singing under the stars.

Steve was hanging off Eddie. His arm slung around Eddie’s neck while he sung his heart out into his beer can. Eddie couldn’t pull his eyes off the man. They hadn’t kissed yet. Hadn’t even acknowledged what was happening between them.

But under the August night sky of finally saved Hawkins, Indiana, Eddie Munson fell in love with Steve Harrington.

“You ok, man?” Dale suddenly appears to Eddie’s left, and Eddie has to clear his throat to hide the emotions trying to crawl up his throat.

“Mhm, I’m good. Fucking hate this song.” Eddie keeps his eyes pointed down because it would be painfully obvious he was lying otherwise.

Dale chuckles. “Yeah, hear that. Rach loves it. She belts it out whenever it comes on the radio and she’s in the kitchen.”

Eddie’s heart aches a little more at the idea that maybe Steve would do the same thing.

The phone behind the bar rings and Eddie jumps to grab it.

“Mickey’s.”

“Eddie?”

His heart drops to his feet because how could he know Eddie was thinking about him?

“Steve? Are you ok?” Eddie’s ears are pounding as he waits.

“I don’t know.” Steve sounds too sad for Eddie’s heart.

“Hold on, ok? I’m gonna take my break and pick you up back in the office. Ok? Just give me two minutes.”

“Ok,” Steve whispers.

Eddie presses the hold button and asks Dale to watch the bar, then races to the back room. His fingers fumble to pick up the phone as he drops into the ancient office chair.

“Stevie? What’s wrong?” Eddie’s heart is racing.

“Nothin’, really. I was- I was thinking about you. Robin said I should call.”

“I’m glad you did,” Eddie’s fingers wind through the phone cord anxiously. “Y’know what was playing on the jukebox? Just now?”

“What?” Steve’s voice sounds soft and fluffy.

“I wanna know what love iiiiiissss,” Eddie sings softly down the line. He hears Steve chuckle and it pushes him to keep singing. “I want you to show meeeeee.”

Eddie hears Steve take a shaky breath. “Eddie?”

“Yeah?”

“I miss you.”

Eddie can’t stop himself from smiling. “I miss you, too.”

“No-no you don’t understand.”

“What?”

“I miss you. I miss your smile. I miss your laugh. I miss poking your dimples. I fucking miss you. I should’ve gone with. I’m so stupid. I should’ve gone with you. And it’s too late and I miss you so fucking much. I’m sorry. Shit,” Steve clears his throat. “I shouldn’t have called you. I’m sorry. I’m a fucking mess. I’m sorry. I’m gonna go. Sorry for calling you at work.”

“Steve? Don’t hang up. Please. Don’t hang up.” Eddie rushes out. “Listen to me, don’t hang up.”

“Ok.”

“Stevie? Baby?” Eddie hears Steve whine at the pet name. “I miss you, too. I do. I miss the smell of your hairspray, and the way you crinkle your nose in the morning when your alarm goes off. I miss you and Robin giving me a hard time about my smoking. I hate it here, baby. Fucking California sucks. I miss the stars. But I miss you more. Don’t come out here. I wanna come home.”

He’s been thinking about it for months, waiting for his sign. If Steve calling him out of the blue, while Foreigner is playing on the jukebox, and tells him how much he’s missed him isn’t a clear sign then nothing will be.

“I love you, Steve. I never stopped loving you. I’m glad you didn’t come out here. You’d hate it and probably hate me because of it.” Eddie drags a knuckle under his eye.

“I love you, too. But I don’t want you to give up on your dreams. What about the band? What about The Garden?”

“They hate it here too. Gareth is a week away from quitting. I can feel it. Jeff has a girlfriend and a really good job that he’s not going to give up. It’s over. We tried. Music is different now. New decade means new sound. I wanna come home.” He takes a deep inhale and feels a million pounds lighter. “Fuck, I’d come home right now if I could. Sneak into your place and snuggle under your covers.”

“Yeah?” Eddie can hear Steve’s smile.

“Yep, scoop you up into my arms and kiss every single beauty mark across your skin. Fuck, I miss biting those two on your neck. Are they still there? Do they miss me?”

“You’re ridiculous. Yes they’re still there.”

“And??” Eddie leans forward in his chair.

“Yes they miss you,” Steve says quietly like he’s trying to hide his face.

“I knew it,” Eddie groans. “Tell them I’m gonna be home soon, ok? I gotta get back to work, baby. I’m gonna call you tomorrow and we can talk about it.”

“Ok,” Steve hums. “I love you.”

“Love you, too.” Eddie’s cheeks are hurting. He can’t stop smiling. “God, I love you. Fuck, that feels good to say. I love you, Steve Harrington. I fucking love you. Ok, I gotta hang up. Tomorrow. I’ll call you tomorrow. Ok?”

“Yeah. I love you, Eddie Munson. Night.”

“Bye, baby.”

Eddie slowly lowers the phone down before jumping to his feet and punching happily into the air. He spins around a few times before trying to collect himself and heading back to the bar.

Dale raises an eyebrow at him. “Everything good?”

“Yep, great. Everything’s fucking great.” He slaps the man on the shoulder and beams brightly at him. “You know what? We should play Foreigner again.”

Eddie bounces around the bar and giddily drops change into the machine. He punches in the corresponding buttons, leans against the device and waits for the music to fill the air. Dale watches amusingly from across the almost empty bar when Eddie starts to shimmy his shoulders to the music.

I've gotta take a little time

A little time to think things over

Eddie can’t help himself and sings along. His chest is filled with too much joy to hold it back.

I better read between the lines

In case I need it when I'm older

“Dude? What are you doing?” Dale yells across the room.

“I’m fucking singing, man. Someone still loves me back home. I’m fucking singing.”

Dale rolls his eyes fondly, shakes his head, and turns back to the bar.

Eddie doesn’t care.

He’s going home.

Steve still loves him.

He’s going home.

coffee? ☕️🍩💕

Reply or send me an ask to be added to my permanent tag list.

#happy ending #hurt/comfort #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #steve x eddie #steddiecameraroll posts #my writing #steddie ficlet

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violentdelightsandviolentends · 2 days

Text

Cherry Blossom. aka - Cherry, Part Four.

a night of conversations, kisses and long awaited confessions.

pairing - bestfriend!steve harrington x female reader

warnings - cursing, kissing (but no real smut).

word count - 2.6k

authors note - the babies are back!! no smut in this one - it was getting too long. but don’t you worry… there’s gonna be so much smut in part five !! sorry for the cliffhanger. love u <3

as always, reblogs, comments and feedback (even anonymous feedback!) are immensely appreciated!! your reblogs are the only way to circulate my fics, which keeps me going <3

series masterlist. main masterlist. inbox.

The smoke from the bonfire is stinging your eyes, ash sticking to the strands of your hair. Orange embers burn rapidly, dry wood being occasionally thrown on top by drunk boys with red cups in their hands.

The music is way too loud for a forest party, but no one seems to care. Someone’s haphazardly strung lights between the trees, creating a surprisingly cosy ambience. The atmosphere is alive, charged with the electricity of being out later than curfew.

“M’lady!��

You laugh, accepting the drink from Eddie’s outstretched hand.

“Thank you, kind sir,” you say as you curtsy sarcastically, making both of you laugh harder. “Hey, you didn’t bump into Steve on your way over here, did you? I haven’t seen him for like an hour.”

The curly haired boy kicks the toe of your sneaker with his.

“Saw him with that Clara girl, talking by the lake.”

You take a steadying breath, pretending it doesn’t bother you in the slightest.

“You should go and check if he needs rescuing,” Eddie jokes. “God knows she can talk for hours without coming up for air.”

You smile at him, pulling at one of his curls.

“Good idea. Just in case.”

“Just in case,” he winks, pushing you in the right direction.

You saunter down towards the water, spotting your best friend instantly. He’s stood with his arms across his chest, weight on one hip as he tries to listen to whatever Clara has to say. The minute he sees you, his posture is straightening, lips quirking up at the corners.

Clara turns around to see what Steve is looking at, her face falling when she recognises you.

“Hi. I don’t mean to interrupt! Just wanted to check if you needed another drink, Stevie.”

The boy grins, beckoning you closer with a nod of his head. When you’re near enough, he leans down and presses a sweet kiss to your lips, all affectionate and tender.

Oh.

You don’t do that.

The two of you have kept your romance completely behind closed doors, up until now. It hasn’t got a name, never mind a label, and you don’t need people asking questions when you don’t even know the answers yourself.

You could blame it on the alcohol, but you know Steve’s on his first drink. With your head spinning, you look up at him as if he is the sun and all things warm. He looks down at you the exact same way.

“I’m gonna go see where my friends are,” Clara says a little too loudly, strutting away with as much confidence as she can muster.

You have a sudden feeling that you’re the villain in her story, but you’re not entirely sure why.

“How many drinks have you had?” Steve asks as he pulls a strand of hair away from your face.

“This is my second. I was nursing my first one, Eddie says.”

The boy laughs, and you grab onto his bicep for support. The sound of it is enough to buckle your knees.

“This is my first. It’s not doing much for me.”

“You want something different? I’m sure Robin has that beer you like in her bag.”

“Nah, I’m okay. Don’t think I’m gonna drink any more tonight.”

Steve slips his hands into the back pockets of your jeans, pulling you in closer and keeping them there.

“You sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“Okay,” you whisper.

“Okay,” he whispers back.

And then he kisses you. Again. It’s slow and careful and so romantic that you think you might start crying about it.

“What time is it?” he asks when he pulls away as if nothing happened.

“Eleven thirty.”

“You wanna stay a bit longer?”

“Not if you don’t.”

Steve presses his lips to your forehead, hands cradling your cheeks.

“I kinda wanna go home.”

You smile at him, all soft and sweet.

“Then let’s go home. I’m getting a little cold, anyway. And I didn’t bring a jacket.”

“Will you ever learn?” he laughs, slinging an arm around your shoulders.

“If it means I have to stop wearing your jackets that I know you bring to parties just for me? No, I won’t.”

You weren’t supposed to say that out loud, but the way Steve chuckles soothes the sting of the accidental wound.

“Let’s go home, Cherry Baby.”

Home. The assumption that the two of you will always be returning to the same place makes your heart so full, you wonder how it doesn’t spill over.

✵ ✵ ·　 ✵ 　　 * · ✵

“You good?”

“Feet hurt.”

This happens every single time the two of you go to a party, so you feel as if you’re reliving a memory.

“Hop on.”

“Steve-”

“Cherry. Come on. We’ll get home quicker this way.”

You can’t argue with that. Steve crouches as you jump onto his back, his hands wrapping around your thighs to keep you steady. You wrap your arms around his neck from behind, resting your head on top of his.

“Comfy back there?”

You hum, the noise of agreement enough for Steve to start walking.

The two of you chat each others ears off on the way home, talking about nothing and everything. You laugh so hard at something he says that you end up with a mouthful of his hair, which he in turn finds hilarious.

“Have you thought any more about what I said the other day?”

“You say a lot of things, Steven.”

He chuckles, shaking his head and giving your thighs a squeeze.

“About college.”

You go quiet for a moment, and Steve wonders if he’s chosen the wrong time to have this conversation.

“I’ve been thinking about it.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Let’s talk about it later, okay? When I’m not constantly worried I’m gonna accidentally trip and kill you.”

You nod, and he feels it. You know it needs to be a discussion sometime soon, but perhaps having it when you’re being carried down the street on your best friends back isn’t all that practical.

“Love you,” you mumble into the crook of Steve’s neck.

He shudders a little at your lips on his skin, leaning his head sideways to rest against yours.

“Love you, Cherry Pie. More than anything.”

You let Steve piggyback you all the way to his front door. Neither of you say anything else. Neither of you feel the need to.

✵ ✵ ·　 ✵ 　　 * · ✵

Steve bumps his hip into yours as you both brush your teeth, laughing at your shocked reflection in the mirror.

“Are you okay?” you ask as you place your toothbrush back in its holder, right next to his.

“Yeah, I’m good.”

“You sure?”

You hop up on the bathroom counter, sitting up so you’re eye to eye with the boy in front of you. He takes a step forward, standing between your legs as he splays his cold hands over your thighs.

“Why’d you ask?”

You trace over his fingers where they rest on your skin, quiet for a moment.

“You seemed pretty eager to go home tonight. It’s unlike you. You love a party. Leaving at eleven thirty is like… unheard of, for King Steve.”

“King Steve would rather be at home with you than at a party with all those people.”

“Really?”

“Really. Clara was going on about something or other, the music was too loud, and I could feel the chill coming in. It hit me, all of a sudden, that I’d rather be in bed. Or, anywhere else, as long as I was with you.”

You lean forward to rest your head against his chest, sighing when he starts playing with your hair gently.

“You’re a softie,” you mumble into his shirt. “And a mind reader.”

“It’s my one talent,” he chuckles. “I wish reading your mind was a college major. I’d be the best in the world.”

You shake your head, laughing like you can’t help it.

“If I don’t move soon, I’m gonna fall asleep on this bathroom counter.”

“Want me to carry you?”

“Contrary to popular belief,” you tease as you hop down, “my legs actually do work.”

Steve gasps, all theatrical and exaggerated, which only makes you laugh harder.

“Come on, sleepy girl. Let’s go to bed.”

✵ ✵ ·　 ✵ 　　 * · ✵

“We’re not talking about stuff.”

You whisper it into the darkness, the trees rustling outside Steve’s window serving as the only sound you can hear.

“Hmm?”

Your legs are tangled with his, tired head resting on the boys shoulder as your sides are pressed together. You’re both lying on your backs, staring at the ceiling.

“We keep saying we’ll talk about stuff, but we haven’t been. It’s not like us.”

“You mean, like, feelings?”

“Yeah.”

All that can be heard now is two sets of heaving lungs. Steve’s hand finds yours under the duvet, fingers intertwining.

“Is there something specific that’s bothering you?”

“Not bothering me as such. I just… I think the more we don’t talk, the more complicated things become.”

There’s silence for a moment, before Steve speaks.

“I’m scared, Cherry.”

The tone of his voice is paper thin and vulnerable, and you will yourself not to cry about it.

“Of what, Stevie?”

You squeeze his hand, tucking yourself further into his side until there isn’t an inch of space between you.

“Of… everything changing. You’re my best friend in the entire world, and I know that what we’ve been doing isn’t typical… best friend stuff. I just…” he takes a deep breath, exhaling carefully. “I worry that something will happen and we’ll break up, and I’ll lose you forever.”

His voice cracks on the last word, fear seeping through his pores. Yet, he continues.

“I’d die without you, Cherry. I really would. I don’t know what it’s like to live in a world where we’re not… us.”

You turn onto your side to face him in the dark, reaching up to cradle his cheek softly. You rest your forehead against his temple, pressing a kiss into his skin.

“I’m scared too. I have been ever since that first night in my room. Not because I don’t trust you, or because I don’t feel that way about you… but because I don’t want to lose you either. More than anything, I don’t want to lose you.”

“Why didn’t we talk about this sooner?” he laughs, throat thick with emotion.

“Because we’re us. And whether we talk or don’t talk, we know we’ll figure it out. We always know we’ll be okay.”

“I love you,” he whispers into the dark. “More than all the stars in the sky.”

“I love you,” you whisper back. “More than all the grains of sand on all the beaches in the world.”

You press another kiss into his temple, letting your lips linger on his soft skin. He smells so familiar, so warm, so yours… you can’t help but inhale, chuckling when he shudders.

You continue to leave kisses across his jaw, over his ear, down his neck. He tilts his head to give you better access, groaning when you nip at his throat with your teeth, licking over the scrape to soothe him.

Steve pulls you in as if you weigh nothing, moving you so you’re lying on top of him. You sit up, straddling his lap, as he does the same so you’re chest to chest. Running his hands under your shirt and over the bare skin of your back, he rests his forehead against yours.

“You look so pretty like this,” he hums against your lips. “Prettiest girl in the world.”

“You wanna talk about pretty?” you tease, running your fingers through his hair. “My pretty, pretty boy.”

Steve’s hips buck up into yours, making you giggle.

“Oh, you like that? You like it when I call you pretty? Or do you just like it when I call you mine?”

His hips buck again as his cheeks flush pink.

“I am yours,” he murmurs. “Always have been.”

You thought you had the upper hand for a minute, but now you just want to cry. You’re overwhelmed by the way you feel about the boy underneath you, unsure of how to process it without bursting into tears.

“All mine,” you whisper, tracing the features of his face with your fingertip.

Steve takes a deep breath, watching your eyes as they look over him again and again, taking him in as if it’s the first time. He decides it’s now or never.

“Cherry?”

“Stevie?”

Your voices are low and careful, irregardless of the fact that you’re alone in the house.

“I’m in love with you.”

Your heart stops, and so does the world outside. Everything pauses, the two of you suspended in this moment in time.

Steve takes another breath, exhaling it carefully before meeting your eyes and continuing.

“You don’t have to say it back. Now, or ever. I just - I needed you to know.”

You blink back tears as you watch his face, biting your lip to stop them from falling.

“Steve-”

“Hey, I told you. You don’t have to say anything, babe. I know-”

“Shut up.”

“What?”

“Just-”

You surge forward and kiss him with all the affection you can muster, trying to express your feelings. You grip his hair, plastering your bodies together where you sit in his lap still. He wraps his arms around you, pulling you in as close as he can.

“If you let me talk,” you say when you pull away, all breathless, “you’d hear that I have something I’d like to say.”

Steve smiles, humming in acknowledgment and encouraging you to keep going.

“I’m in love with you, too.”

The boy looks shocked to hear it, as if it’s news to him.

“What’s that face for?” you laugh.

“I just… I didn’t expect you to say it back.”

“Steve,” you chuckle, looking at him sternly. When you realise he’s being serious, you double down. “I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember. When we were kids, and someone would say the word ‘husband’, I always pictured you. I was so convinced it was always going to end up being you and I.”

“Why… why didn’t you say anything sooner?”

“Why didn’t you?”

He laughs, and the sound makes you feel as if you’re on cloud nine. You can feel his heartbeat where his chest is pressed to yours, frantic like he’s just ran a marathon.

“Fuck, I love you.”

He leans up to kiss you, all saccharine and honey sweet.

“Say it again,” you whisper against his lips.

“I’m in love with you, Cherry.”

“Say it again.”

“I, Steve Harrington, declare that I am completely, utterly, ridiculously in love with this girl right here. I always have been. I always will be.”

You can’t help but throw your head back with laughter.

“And I love you. So much.”

The words you’ve always said mean so much more now. It’s a welcome change, one you never thought you’d see happen.

“Hey Steve?”

“Hmm?”

You lean in, nosing at his jaw as you murmur into his ear.

“Want you. So bad.”

“Fuck, honey,” he groans, all low and rough.

“Please. Want it to be you.”

Looking up at you with big eyes, he searches your face for any kind of hesitation.

“Are you sure?”

Smoothing his hair away from his face, you trace your thumb over his bottom lip.

“I’ve never been so sure of anything.”

“Okay.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” he grins. “I’m about to rock your world, Cherry Blossom.”

@psychicnerdcat @allcheesemelts @valerievortex @swiftsgirlfriend @steviespookie @betweenstarsandsatellites @mrsjoequinn @internallysalad @saucypeanuttt @empathyroad @niceskyler @spookysins @theoraekenslover @7minutes-tomidnight @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx @clairesjointshurt @livsters @diffrent-spokes @regular-joe-shmoe @ihatepeanutss @ladyburberry @thenonweeknd @abarelyexistentbeing @jennaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa @slut4gaga @hopelessromanticwriter @mgchaser @wintrsoldrluvr

#steve harrington fic #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington smut #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington #steve harrington x reader smut #steve harrington x reader fluff #steve harrington x bestfriend!reader #bestfriend!steve harrington #bestfriend!steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x bestfriend reader #stranger things x reader #stranger things smut #stranger things fluff

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rcmclachlan · 7 hours

Text

civil twilight (buck/tommy)

For @dadvans, who is a dirty enabler whenever I start having ideas and thoughts. Del, here are your damn bucktommy wedding vows, are you happy now?? 🩷

With a smile, Bobby looks out at the congregation—one hundred and fifty people squeezed onto the Ceremony Deck of the 1909, including what appears to be every first responder that Buck has ever met—and announces, “I’m happy to say we’ve come to the part of the ceremony that Buck and Tommy have been looking forward to the most. They’ve prepared a little something for each other to be shared for the very first time today. What they say now will sanctify this moment now and forever.”

Excitement and anticipation chase each other under Buck’s skin like dogs, and he can’t help but bounce a little on his toes, which are pinched like hell in the shoes Maddie made him buy.

It took him almost a month to comb through the rolodex of his life—taking out cards from between color-coded dividers organized by year and studying each one to remind himself of exactly how he got to this point—to find the right words. He thought about them every second of every day. He filled his notes app to the point they made him pay for extra storage. He fought a five-alarm warehouse fire alongside almost twenty other companies and spent the entire time rearranging sentences in his head.

There were nights he lay curled against Tommy’s back and practiced for hours against the heat of his skin—soundlessly, of course, although with the way Tommy snores after a double shift it’s not like he would’ve been heard—until he was satisfied.

But the thought of Tommy doing the same makes Buck a little crazy. Did Tommy scribble half-baked thoughts on the back of a Pizzeria Sei receipt, or did he watch Love, Actually for the two hundredth time and take notes while Colin Firth gave a speech to a very confused town, or did he crowdsource ideas from the yahoos over at Harbor? Knowing Tommy, he just started spitballing at the horizon from a thousand feet above the city and got it on the first try.

Buck’s been vibrating in place for months thinking about this exact moment, and now that it’s finally here he’s going to explode all over all their guests before he even gets to say “I do.”

“Buck? Tommy?” Bobby’s voice is warm, like he knows exactly how much oxygen is feeding the fire in Evan’s belly. “Take each other’s hands and hold on tight.”

Before Bobby’s even finished talking, Tommy’s already stepping forward and reaching for Buck, which is good because Buck’s already reaching for him, too. Their hands come together with the ease of automatic doors in a department store, sliding to meet like they were made for nothing else. Their fingers tangle and lock, and Buck is thrilled to find neither of their palms are sweaty. Tommy’s smiling so hard his nose looks like it’s about to scrunch its way into his hairline, and Buck’s moved so close he’s practically stepping on Tommy’s feet. They meet in a very narrow middle.

“Buck."

He closes his eyes and presses his lips together to keep the fireworks in his belly from erupting out of his mouth and incinerating the entire canopy. From where he's standing behind Buck, Eddie taps him twice on the shoulder with his fist as if to say, we were all forced to listen to you talk about this for half a year; you've got this, but also don't screw it up.

“You’re up first.”

Drawing in a trembling breath, Buck reaches deep down into the little gilded space where he’s been keeping the words safe all this time. He holds them for a moment, traces the familiar edges of them, and hopes every person on the deck right now is going to be able to hear him. He wants them to know.

Tommy squeezes his hand gently, and Buck looks at him, at the shape of his smile that Buck could draw with his eyes closed. It's suddenly so easy to open his mouth.

"My first real memory is of going with Maddie to the park down the street from our house so we could watch the sunset. I sat on a swing and stared at the sky until it got dark, and even then I couldn't tear my eyes away. Maddie said it looked like I was searching for something."

Like every other time Buck's brought up some random story from when he was a dumbass kid, Tommy's lips roll inward. The first time it happened, he thought Tommy was trying not to laugh at him and he wanted to crawl under a rock like a bug to escape the threat of being completely crushed. But then Tommy admitted to being so charmed by Buck's story that he had to hide the sheer goofiness of his smile so Buck didn't think he was a total psycho. It's true. When Tommy lets that particular brand of smile out, he looks like a serial killer, so whenever Buck sees the inward lip roll, he knows he's one spate of cute aggression away from being turned into a human coat rack. It's awesome.

"It wasn't until I started writing this and looked back on my life that I realized how often I did it. No matter where I was, who I was with, or what I was doing, I'd end the day with my eyes on the sky. It sort of felt like something was going to come swooping out of the clouds just for me and I didn't want to miss it when it did. I didn't really think about it until after the first time I met you, because I didn't have a chance to look at the sky that night—you took me straight there instead. I haven't come back down since."

The tail end of the sentence grows soft and tight, and his eyes grow wet and hot. Which isn't a surprise. He hasn't made it through a single practice run of this part without his taps going on. He clears his throat and squeezes Tommy's hands tightly, reassured by the strength of them, in the firmness of the grip.

Mortified and elated, he blinks so the tears fall. Tommy sucks in a breath, then distangles his left hand from Evan's right so he can reach up to thumb them away.

"Turns out Maddie was right," he says, smiling wide and pressing into the touch. "I didn't know it, but all that time I was searching for you."

Tommy presses his lips together, but it isn't to hide a smile—it's to hide the way his mouth is trembling and he's doing a shit job of it. Buck chokes a little on a wet laugh. His chest feels sweetly sore, like a pressing on a bruise.

"That was beautiful," Bobby says. He's looking at Buck in the way that always makes him wonder at just how incredible his life would've been if he'd been Buck's dad from the get go. Which is probably a mean thing to do right now, considering his actual father is sitting in the second row, but if Bobby weren't officiating the ceremony he'd be sitting in the first, and that really says everything.

Beaming, Bobby turns to Tommy and inclines his head. "Your turn, Tommy."

Anticipation sings in Buck's chest, and when Tommy meets his gaze, his eyes bright and clear like an autumn sky over the San Bernardino mountains, it lights the fuse on a whole new batch of fireworks under his skin. He inhales shakily and gives him what he hopes is an encouraging smile.

Tommy's expression evens out, but sweetness still lurks at the corner of his mouth.

"Evan."

Buck's eyes flutter a little. It's amazing to think he used to hate the sound of that name. When Tommy says it, it feels like sunlight.

"I spent most of my life afraid," Tommy begins. His voice is steady. "I grew up thinking I was made wrong, and I cut off pieces of myself to try and fit in where I thought I was supposed to belong. I tried finding peace in the sky, but all that emptiness did was remind me of how alone I was."

Heart pounding, Buck squeezes Tommy's hands so tightly he thinks they might meld together.

"You know, I owe the 118 a lot. They helped me become a better teammate, a better friend… a better person. But there's no way I can ever repay them for how they changed me by bringing you into my life."

After all the time he spent thinking about Tommy simply writing his vows, it somehow never registered that he would actually have to say them out loud. In front of all their family and friends. That he'd be cracking open his chest and showing what's inside to the whole world as proof of his devotion. That he'd willingly do it for Buck simply because he loves him and wants to love him for the rest of their lives.

"Evan, from the moment I met you, you've shown me what it is to be brave. You've taught me how there's courage in loving with your whole heart and living your entire truth."

There is no way in hell he's going to be able to stand here and listen to this without gnawing on the deck railing or launching himself at Tommy to put his mouth on his bare skin. How do people do this without being charged with a misdemeanor?

"You found the pieces of me I thought were gone forever and put them back together differently. Better. You helped me make someone who isn't afraid of anything. I know we tease you about going The Full Buck, but because of you, because I know you're next to me ready to face anything that comes—" His voice breaks. "—I'm brave enough to go The Full Tommy."

Buck can barely see him through the tears that won't stop welling and falling, and if they were anywhere else, he'd wrap himself around Tommy like a snake and squeeze him until the storm passed, but because he's bound by dumb things like decorum and obscenity laws, Buck can only keep hold of his hands and try to transfer every ounce of love and comfort in his body to Tommy's by way of their tangled fingers.

Then, suddenly, a shit-eating grin splits the gentle and earnest expression on Tommy's face, and he feels a bit like a bird right before it's sucked into a jet engine. Warning bells go off in the back of Buck's mind.

"Evan," Tommy says, with the gravity of someone about to drop an atomic bomb, "you are the best ally I could've ever asked for."

The ugly, snotty laugh that punches its way out of Buck would earn him the respect of even the grubbiest of Jee-Yun's daycare friends, and he finally throws decorum out the window so he can step forward and bury his face in Tommy's shoulder. Between his tears and the spit he's horking from laughter, the suit fabric is definitely ruined.

"I love you so much," he wheezes. "I'd maim a thousand best friends for you."

He can't see Eddie's face, but he knows exactly what it's doing and it only makes him laugh harder. Tommy presses one of his high, incredulous laughs into Buck's hair, followed by a firm kiss to the crown of his head.

"What do you say?" Tommy pulls back a little, but he looks so proud of himself. He looks proud. "Should we finish getting married or what?"

Buck sticks the tip of his tongue between his teeth teasingly. "Or what?"

"Or I go home and order pizza," Chim pipes up from the front row to a smattering of laughter. On his left, Hen drops her face into her hands, but her shoulders are shaking. On his right, Maddie smacks him on the arm like she's mortified, but she's grinning too hard to really sell it. It looks like she's crying just as hard as Buck is.

"All right, all right," Bobby says, ever the voice of calm and reason, but he's very clearly fighting laughter, too. "Why don't we finish this up?"

"You ever get tired of herding cats, Cap?" Eddie asks, a grin in his voice.

"Never," Bobby says. He lifts his brows pointedly at Buck. "Are you ready?"

Buck turns back to Tommy, and in the curve of his smile he sees the same glowing possibility that he's seen in ten thousand different sunsets, and his entire body clenches with the exhilarating and terrifying feeling of something's coming for me and I can't miss it.

Heart pounding, he grins and holds his hands out again. They're immediately enfolded into Tommy's, like there was never a question about where they should go.

He glances up through the canopy to glimpse the pockmarks of blue between the trees, but there's nothing coming for him. When he looks back down and meets Tommy's gaze, that hungry anticipation settles into warm fullness. He can call off the search; it's finally here.

Buck smiles wide enough to encompass the sky. "I've been ready, Cap. Let's do this."

#bucktommy #tevan #kinley #911 fic #911 abc #wedding fic baybeeeeeee

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