#The fuck fuck fuck fuck one made me have to pause cause I was laughing so hard
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Whiplash (2)
Pairing: Felix x Reader x Hyunjin
Genre: Street Racing, Gang, Friends to Lovers
Word Count: 4k
Taglist: @sheala--marie @kayleefriedchicken @chartrucewhore @cookiesnmilfx
Part One |
“I'm never drinking again.” You groan, rubbing your head, squeezing your eyes shut as you try to sooth your throbbing head. The only thing you remembered about last night was dancing with that guy and then everything goes blank. You take a deep breath in and out before your eyes shoot open. You sniff harder, smelling something delicious, wondering who was in your apartment. And then it hit you, you weren't even home. You looked around, recognizing Hyunjin's room immediately. You crawl out of his bed, your feet shuffling out the door and down the hallway, towards the delicious smell. As you get closer you can hear Felix and Hyunjin talking.
“Food always gets her up. Just wait.” Felix laughed. He knew you so well.
“This smells so good.” You groan, sitting down at the island as you watch the two make pancakes, bacon and eggs.
“I told you.” Felix says, glancing at Hyunjin.
“Good morning.” Hyunjin says, smiling at you as he slides a plate in front of you.
“Morning.” You smile, picking up your fork, ready to dig in. But you couldn't. You looked up at the two men, who were staring at you smirking.
“Do I have something on my face?” you ask, wiping your face off. Neither of them reply, they just keep cooking, glancing at you and smirking.
You take a few bites of your food, trying to ignore those two but flashes of last night keep playing in your head.
“Did I.. “ you pause. “Did I do something last night?” You ask.
Hyunjin and Felix look at each other and then back at you. “Okay, what!?” You yell.
“Maybe I need to get off too.. cause of you two!” Felix says, his voice deep, his eyes on you.
“The things I wanna do to the two of you are not platonic.” Hyunjin says.
Your fork drops as you gasp. Your hands cover your mouth as you stare at them both, your eyes wide. The memories come flooding back to you like a tidal wave and you want to actually fucking die.
“That.. I, um. Wow. Okay so I was drunk. Like really drunk. My sincerest apologies. I'm gonna go.” You mumble. You slip out of the chair quicker than you realized, slipping on your shoes and grabbing your purse and heading out the door. You could not believe you had said all that. you were gonna be embarrassed for the rest of your life. Once you had walked a couple blocks you called a cab so you could properly grieve and call Seulgi so she could talk you off the ledge.
“You said what!?” She gasps.
“Yeah.. drunk me has no sense of boundaries apparently.” You sigh.
“So what are you gonna do?” She asks.
“I'm going to handle it like a mature adult.” You declare. “And pretend it never happened.” You can hear Selgui sigh on the other end of the phone.
Once you're home, you collapse in your bed, closing your eyes while your brain replays the things you said to Hyunjin and Felix the night before. Drunk you really liked to speak your sober thoughts apparently. As embarrassed as you were, you were feeling more anxious than anything. Based on their reactions this morning you knew your friendship wasn't ruined with them, but you couldn't help but feel guilty for saying those things. What if you had made them uncomfortable? What if they started distancing themselves from you? You were a ball of stress and you weren't sure how, or if you could make things better.
You spent the rest of the day in bed, ignoring any phone call and text that made your phone ring. You just wanted to wallow in your self pity for a little bit longer before facing anyone. Part of you knew it wasn't a very big deal, but the other part was mad because you had done so well to keep yourself in a platonic place with them. Finally a few hours later, and after you couldn't stand listening to the beeps and ringing of your phone anymore, you looked at it. All the messages from Felix and Hyunjin, not to mention the phone calls from them as well as from Chan, Changbin and Han begging you to come over for homemade pizza night. you decided to text Han back, letting him know that you'll be right there. You didn't wait for a reply, not that you needed to, but you got dressed and headed over to face the music.
Walking into the house, it's unusually quiet. Where were those rowdy boys? All you could hear was the low humming that was coming from the kitchen. You followed the sound, finding Felix in the kitchen, rolling out dough.
“Hey.” You smile, sitting at the island that you left in a rush only a few hours before.
“Hey you.” He grins, looking up for a second before focusing back on his dough. “The others had to run out for a bit, but we'll let the dough rise and then make the pizzas.” He tells you. You nod your head, feeling too nervous to say anything.
“Can I get you a cocktail?” He asks.
“Oh god, please.” You smile. You knew you shouldn't, but what more could you say to him? Felix quickly whips you up something delicious and you drink it far too quickly.
“Good thing I made extra.” He chuckles, filling your cup again. This time you sip on it as he works on more dough. “What's up? Why do you seem all weird?” He asks.
“What?” You question. You were acting weird, you were quiet and distant.
“Is it because of last night?” He asks, not looking up at you.
“Yeah.” You sigh. “I don't want things to be weird with the three of us.”
“Why would things be weird?” He asks, now looking at you.
“Because of what.. I, you know, said.” You mutter. Felix laughs.
“Maybe I want you to use me non platonically.” He smirks, looking up at you.
Your stomach drops. You stare at him, your mouth hanging open. “I'm.. what?” You ask. But before Felix can reply, you both hear the front door open. You turn your head to look at the entryway, and in walks Hyunjin with a smile plastered on his face.
“There's my girl.” He says, grabbing your chin. “What's going on?” He asks, looking between your shocked face and Felix.
“I think I'm dreaming.” You say, turning back to look at Felix who continues to smirk at you. You pinch your cheek, just to see, but you're not. This is real life.
“Pizza!” You can hear Changbin yell, as the rest of the boys come into the kitchen. They all hug you before standing around the island, Felix giving everyone their dough, and placing all the topping options, cheese and sauce in the middle. The rest of the night you could barely focus, Felix's words replaying in your head.
“Maybe I want you to use me non platonically.”
Was he interested in you? Was he joking? You wanted to ask him, but you didn't want to do it in front of everyone, so you left it. Later that night, as you were trying to sleep in your bed, you fell asleep to the thought of using him non platonically.
Over the next few days, you didn't see much of anyone. They said they had a lot of things going on, and you didn't question it. Sometimes they were very suspicious but you figured they were just being guys. With nothing to do, you made plans with Seulgi and a few other friends for a girls night. But of course, the night that you had plans was the night that the guys wanted to do something.
“How?” You laugh at one of the girls. “How do you manage to score four dudes in one singular night?” You ask. “I can barely get one.”
Everyone at the table laughs at your comment to Lisa. This is what you needed, a fun night out with some girls, and a guy named Mike who had tagged along. It was a good way to get your mind off of things. You took a shot from one of the bottles on the table, beginning to feel tipsy as you eat a little bit of food. You look at Seulgi who is looking at you with a weird look on her face.
“What?” You ask. Her eyes dart over to the left, you look over and see Felix and Hyunjin sitting at a table with two girls you didn't recognize. Your heart sank as you stared at the girls smiling while they're talking. You glance over at the boys, but they don't look like they're enjoying themselves as much as the girls are.
They must have felt your stare, or maybe you stared for too long, but they looked over, directly at you, and seemed shocked to see you. You gave them a slight smile and wave before turning back to your other friends. You tried to ignore them, but you could feel their eyes burning into the side of your head as you spoke, your group drunkenly trying to figure out what to do after dinner.
“Do you guys wanna go to the club?” Mike asks, looking at you. You shrug your shoulders. “I wouldn't say no to dancing there.” You smile, glancing at Felix and Hyunjin, who are now walking over to you.
“Are you guys going to the club?” Hyunjin asks, looking at you. You nod your head, your heart beating quicker. They could do nothing and your heart flutters with butterflies in your stomach.
“We'll see you there.” Felix smiles, walking out of the restaurant with the two girls and Hyunjin. You shake your head, trying to get the thought of them out of your head.
The moment you get to the club, you, Seulgi and Mike head straight for the bar. The three of you take a few shots before heading out to the dance floor, leaving Mike to sit there. You always loved dancing with girlfriends, because you never had to worry about unwanted touching. The two of you danced by yourself for a bit, until Mike decided to join you, and for some reason he had decided he wanted to dance with you. His hands grabbed your hips to pull you in close to him, but you really didn't want to. Seugli had disappeared on you, leaving you to fight him off on your own. He turns you around to face him, his hands roaming your body. You push him away, but he grabs your wrist, holding it tightly.
“I just wanna dance with you.” Mike grits through his teeth. You can see the anger bubbling up through his body.
“I don't want to dance with you. I'm sorry.” You say, trying to free your wrist from his grip.
“One dance. That's all I want. You can't tease me and then not give me what I want.” He scoffs.
“Excuse me?” You yell, pulling your wrist from his grip. “I never fucking teased you. I said no, so fucking listen.” You turn to walk away from him but he grabs you again, holding you even tighter, trying to pull you off the dance floor. You fight him with all you had but he just holds on tighter, pulling you away. Until you halt, you look up and see Hyunjin standing in front of Mike, he's angry. Your wrist is released, Felix now holding onto Mike's hand, twisting his wrist hard, causing Mike to fall to his knees.
“Don't you know what no means?” Felix asks, his voice scary as he glares at Mike. You turn and run to Hyunjin, he wraps his arms around you as he continues to stare at Mike. Felix leans down, whispering into Mike's ear. “You touch her again, I'll fucking kill you. Got it?”
Luckily you don't hear him as you nuzzle into Hyunjin's chest. Until you realize that they had dates, and they needed to get back to them. You felt guilty, it seemed like you were always getting into situations that they needed to save you from and that wasn't fair. You backed away from Hyunjin, looking sad and guilty.
“You guys have dates. They're probably looking for you.” You say, looking up at them both. “Thank you for helping me, and I'm sorry you have to keep saving me.” You whisper.
Felix and Hyunjin look at each other before looking back at you. “Don't apologize.” Hyunjin smiles.
“We'd go to war for you, baby.” Felix winks before he and Hyunjin leave to find the girls they were with. Finally Seulgi comes back, explaining she was waiting in the longest line for the bathroom.
“What happened!? Why are you crying?” She asks.
“Mike.” You sniffle. “He wanted to dance and I didn't. He got really aggressive.” Seulgi looks guilty as she listens to you.
“I'm so sorry.” She whispers, pulling you in for a hug.
“Luckily Hyunjin and Felix saved me.” You chuckle. “I don't know where Mike went off too.”
“Fuck Mike, he's banned from the group now.” She says. “Where did Felix and Hyunjin go?” She asks.
“I sent them back with their dates.” You say. She nods her head.
“What do you wanna do?” She asks. “Stay or go?”
“I'm gonna go. But you stay. Honestly, I just need some air. I'm gonna walk home. I promise I'll be fine. I'll call you when I'm home.” You say, giving a slight smile. She hugs you tightly, and watches you walk out of the club.
You really didn't want to call a cab but you did. You weren't dumb, you knew something bad could happen if you walked. You didn't want to bother any of the boys. You stood outside the club, waiting for your cab and you were annoyed, you felt like you only attracted men who didn't have good intentions and you didn't know why. You just wanted someone.. maybe two men who loved you with everything they had, like you felt for them. Honestly you just wanted Hyunjin and Felix and you didn't know how much longer you could fight off these feelings. It felt like they were bubbling up to your chest now and it was only a matter of them before they made your head explode.
You paid your fare and headed inside your apartment. You turned on your shower to the hottest that you could handle to scrub off the feeling of Mike's hands on your body. You couldn't help thinking about what could have happened to you had Felix and Hyunjin not been there for you. As you finish in the shower, you come out and check your phone seeing an email you'd been waiting for. A few weeks ago you had interviewed for a receptionist job at an elite law office. You nervously opened the email, screaming and dropping your phone in excitement as you jumped around your room. You got the job and you were so happy to not be living off of your savings anymore. You pick up your phone, reading the rest of the email, seeing you still had a few days before you were starting, you were so happy you completely forgot about what had happened that night. You fell asleep quickly, feeling like everything was going to be okay.
The next morning you woke up, in a great mood and ready for the day. You looked at your phone, seeing a message from Felix.
[9:58am From Felix] Morning, Can I take you to lunch today? I need to talk to you.
A knot immediately formed in your stomach. This was going to be bad. He's going to end the friendship or something. He was probably tired of you and your shit. You didn't want to go, but you needed to know. Your anxiety wouldn't let you not know and you wouldn't be able to function.
[10:09am To Felix] That doesn't sound good. Let me know when and where.
[10:11am From Felix] Same restaurant as last night. Meet you there at 11:30am]
You don't reply. You can't. You can feel the lump in your throat getting bigger. You tried your best to get ready, to make yourself look decent but you were on the verge of tears and you couldn't control it. The thought of losing one of your best friends was devastating.
You sit at the table, your fingers interlaced as you wait for Felix. Your head is down as you try to breathe through the anxiety. You hear the door open, your head shoots up and you see Felix and Hyunjin walk in. There are no smiles, no happy greetings and you knew this was going to be bad. The two men sit down, across from you, staring at you.
“Did you order?” Felix asks, looking at the menu.
“I can't eat right now.” You whisper. Fuck. Your tears were going to start spilling right away.
“Neither can I.” He sighs, closing the menu. “Look, the reason I asked you to lunch and that Hyunjin joined too is that we really need to talk to you about something.” He says.
The tears fall as you look at them. They're now staring at you confused.
“Why are you crying?” Hyunjin asks, reaching over to wipe your tears.
“I don't want to lose you guys.” You cry. They look at each other before looking back at you.
“Why are you losing us?” Felix asks.
“Isn't that what this is? You're ending the friendship?” You ask.
Felix laughs. “I guess in a sense.” He says. He reaches over and grabs your hands. “This isn't about ending anything. More so taking it to the next level.”
You stare at him. “next level? Like ultimate best friends?’ you ask.
They both laugh, and then stone faces as they take a deep breath. “I'm falling in love with you.” Felix admits.
“What?” You whisper.
“And I'm falling in love with you.” Hyunjin admits. “And we don't know what to do.”
“We don't want to ruin things if you don't feel the same but neither of us could hold it in any longer.” Felix says.
Suddenly the tears flow, you take your hands back to cover your face as you sob. Neither of them say a word as you cry. Until Felix's phone rings.
“Yeah Chan?” He answers. “Fuck. Now? Shit okay, we're on our way.” He says. He looks at Hyunjin who immediately knows what's going on.
“We gotta go. But we're having a party tonight. Please come and we can talk.” Felix tells you as they both stand up and walk out the door.
You're in shock. That's not at all how you thought that conversation was going to go.
They are both falling in love with you. And you're already in love with them both. What do you do? Do you choose one and leave one heartbroken, while also leaving yourself heartbroken. Did you date both? Could you date both? Would they be okay with that? You stand up and head home, your mind swirling with thoughts on what to do. You couldn't believe it.
Later that night you got yourself ready for the party, you were very confident on what you were going to do. And you hoped they didn't ask you to choose because you wouldn't be able to. You wanted to give dating both of them both a try. If the three of you put in the effort, you were sure that you guys could do it.
You walk through the door of the party, seeing the house was filled with people. Changbin and Han run up to you, engulfing you in hugs before Han demands another beer chugging rematch.
“We will, later.” You laugh. “Do you know where Felix and Hyunjin are?” You ask.
“I think in the kitchen.” He tells you, going over to say hi to someone else. You make your way to the kitchen, seeing Felix standing there talking to someone. You take a deep breath, and head straight for him. He smiles as he sees you walk up to him. You press up against his chest, sliding your hand on the back of his head, pulling his head down closer to you. He stares into your eyes as you move your face closer and closer, until your lips touch his. As soon as your lips touch, he takes control. He spins you around, pinning you against the fridge as he deepens the kiss, slipping his tongue into your mouth.
Felix breaks the kiss, stepping away from you with a grin on his face. You look past him seeing Hyunjin standing there. You motion him to come to you with your finger. He walks towards you, and you move past Felix, grabbing onto Hyunjin's collar and pulling him down. His lips touch yours and he quickly slides his tongue into your mouth, hardening the kiss.
He pulls away from you, grinning at you and Felix. You guide Hyunjin to stand next to Felix and you clear your throat as you look at both of them.
“I can't choose, and I won't choose. I'm falling hard for you both and I want you both. If you're okay with that then I'm all in, but if you're not then it won't work.” You tell them.
“I'm in.” Hyunjin smiles.
“I'm all in.” Felix says. You were so fucking happy in this moment. You kissed them both before grabbing some celebratory shots. The three of you take a few shots before you drag them both to the living room to dance. You feel as though you're in heaven, grinding your ass into Felix and Hyunjin grinds in front of you. Your happiness is short lived, as the front door busts open and in walks eight men, one of which you recognize. The music shuts off as Chan, Changbin, Jeogin, Minho, Han, Felix and Hyunjin stand in front of the intruders.
“What the hell are you doing here Hongjoong?” Chan yells. The man just laughs.
“What? You thought you could start doing illegal mods on cars and I wouldn't fucking find out?” He yells.
What was going on?
“Is business slow?” Chan asks. “Maybe if you were better at your job, you wouldn't lose so many clients.” He says, fake pouting. Hongjoong turns red as anger consumes him.
“Me and you. A race now, the winner keeps doing mods, and the loser closes up shop.” He yells. Everyone begins cheering but you feel confused. You'd heard about street racing, but you had no idea that they were involved in it. You look at Felix and Hyunjin, who look guilty.
“Y/N.” You hear from across the room. You look over and a familiar man walks over to you. You squint your eyes as he comes closer, and then it hits you. It was San. You had a mini fling with him years ago and ended on good terms and as friends.
“San! Oh my god.” You laugh, running up to him, wrapping your arms around him. “So good to see you.” You laugh, letting go of the large man. Hyunjin and Felix are on each side of you, glaring at their enemy.
“Get your hands off of her.” Felix snaps, pulling you back, and closer to him.
“We used to hook up.” San winks. You roll your eyes.
“If you can even call it that.” You laugh.
“It was good to see you, Y/N.” He says, winking at you before walking towards his group. You turn to Hyunjin and Felix, a stern look on your face.
“Street racing?” You gasp.
“Y/N.. listen.” Hyunjin starts.
“How long?” You ask. “How long have you guys been doing this shit and why didn't you tell me?”
“Since before we met.” Felix says. “It's not that we didn't want to tell you.”
“We just wanted to protect you.” Hyunjin says. “We're involved with a lot of dangerous people. We just want to keep you safe.”
“Hyunjin, Felix. Let's go.” Chan yells. The crowd disperses, heading out to wherever the race is going to be.
“Go to one of our rooms.” Felix says. “We'll be back in a bit.”
You scoff at the handsome man. “Absolutely not.” You deadpan.
“I'm coming with you.”
#lee felix#hwang hyunjin#stray kids#felix smut#hyunjin smut#stray kids smut#kpop fanfic#kpop writing#kpop scenarios#kpop imagines#skz x reader#skz imagines#skz smut#skz fanfic#skz
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thats that me espresso!! // theodore nott x fem reader
playlist: espresso - sabrina carpenter
summary : theodore nott hasnt slept in days, and it was for one reason only. (or one person)
fluff , hufflepuff reader , y/n , short
lucky girl syndrome!! (another theo fic) masterlist
rubbing his eyes wearily , theodore nott poked at his breakfast , feeling the eyes of concerened friends burning into him.
"what?" he asked blankly finally looking up at his friends.
"theo is something wrong?" lorenzo asked with genuine concern snaking through his face and tone.
"yes something- no someone is wrong!" theodore said angrily as he dropped his fork , "i have not slept well for days!"
"why?" draco asked , not really that bothered by theodores insomnia , just wanting to get the tired vibe out of the friendgroup.
"because..beacause!" he started before pausing each time , finally sighing and saying in a hushed voice ,"her!"
his whisper shout and eyes staring into the distance made the whole friend group follow his eyeline , landing on a hufflepuff girl talking to her friends , y/n.
"stop staring!" he said loudly making the whole group turn back to him , drawing their eyes away from the girl , eventhough theodore himself didnt look away.
"y/n? what has she done?" lorenzo asked , confused why his hufflepuff friend would be causing theodore struggle.
"great , of course youre on a first name basis with her!" theodore seethed in jealousy finally tearing his eyes away from your smiling face , "shes not really....done anything.. God i dont know shes like an espresso , i cant look at her without getting a burst of energy! and i cant stop thinking about her its keeping me up all fucking night!!"
the group watched as theodore ranted , exchanging knowing looks before pansy decided to speak up , "theodore dont get angry with that poor girl , its not her fault you like her!"
"how could i ever get angry with her," theodore muttered and stopped talking , until matteos laugh filled the short silence , "what are you laughing at dickhead!" theodore snapped , assuming matteo was laughing at him.
"oh nothing im just laughing at diggory trying to chat up your girl," matteo smirked watching everyone frantically look back to the hufflepuff girl , only to see that she was still sat and talking with her friends , cedric no where to be seen.
theodore , who had stood up in a panic smacked matteo on the back of the head and angrily snapped at the laughing boy, "shut up man not funny."
"sorry , sorry youre really gulible ," matteo laughed to himself , draco smirking at the two.
"i shoudlve never told you lot ," theodore grumbled himself , going back to poking his food.
"dont be like that theo , just a bit of fun , " blaise smirked as theodore threw him an angry look.
"no but seriously theodore , you cant let yourself be exhausted because of a girl" pansy said.
"shes not just a girl , shes nice and funny and beautiful and!-... im pathetic," theo sighed in frustration and ran a hand through his curls.
"im done with all this sappy , annoying shit , go ask her to hogsmeade or ill do it. and trust me i wont rest until she falls in love with me, " draco warned , attempting at making his friend confess.
"DONT!" theodore shouted at him , immediatly letting embrassment sink in as everyone , including you, turned to look at him, "ill....do it"
lorenzo and pansy spoke words of encouragment as the petrified boy rose from the table , draco , matteo and blaise forgetting the whole ordeal and discussing quidditch instead.
once theodore was far enough from the table pansy turned to enzo , "why is that the most emotion ive ever seen out of him in our whole lifelong friendship?"
"dunno , hufflepuffs are really effective i guess," enzo shrugged before they both skipped to another conversation and started eating again.
----
theodore walked towards your table with a confident stride , stopping behind you and sliding in next to you on the bench , close enough to the point that your bodies were pressed togther. as you jumped in suprise theo gave you a flirty smile and stared you dead in the eye.
"hi theodore , can i help you?" you asked wearily , glancing away from him and at your confused friends for a split second.
"yes, you can ," thedore smirked , "how about hogsmeade , this weekend , you and me?"
you physically paused as your mouth hung open , this was the second time you had ever talked to theodore nott and he was suddenly asking you out??!
"oh um....yeah - yeah sure id love to" you gave him a smile , a little cautious and very much confused.
"great , see you then beautiful ,"he winked, planting a kiss on your cheek before slipping out of the bench and confidently walking back to the slytherin table.
you looked at your friends with deep confusion, before going on to watch theo walk away , whilst your friends yapped about how hot he is.
-----
"so how was it?" pansy asked theodore as he sat down.
he quickly dropped his confident , cool face and let a wide grin bless his features , "perfect!!! she said yes! i walked up and acted real calm and collected ,and she didnt know i was nervous at all!!"
pansy and lorenzo smiled at him as the other boys just ignored him , uninterested. "thats great theo! so are you gonna be able to sleep now?" enzo laughed.
"like a baby." theodore grinned.
#harry potter#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott#theo nott#harry potter x reader#slytherin#hufflepuff#draco malfoy#lorenzo berkshire#pansy parkinson#blaise zabini#matteo riddle#x reader#theodore nott x y/n#espresso#sabrina carpenter#fanfic
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Two to Tango
prompt: the aftermath of Carmy's words seem to rattle him more than you.
pairing: Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto x female!reader
pairing: Carmy x Peach
fandom masterlist: FX's The Bear
word count: 5.4k+
note: author still does not want any messages about glorifying toxic relationships. typically, but not always, when someone calls you clingy, it's weaponized and is abusive. this fic is not meant to portray that! it’s meant to show internal agony and the journey to forgiveness - Carmy apologizes 'cause he's actually sorry!
warnings: cursing, reader folds 'cause who wouldn't for the sweet puppy that is Carmy, hurt and comfort, small angst, small fluff, we talk about Mikey a bit, author uses writing as therapy, relationship angst...? barely edited.
part one:
God's Plan
browse Clingy Baby collection masterlist here
"It's six in the Goddamn morning!" You raged at your front door, stomping up to it, "Are you dumb in the fucking head!? Who the fuck in their right mind knocks like the Goddamn cops at six in the fucking morning!?"
You whipped it open, the force causing a breeze of air to blow your bedridden hair back and highlight your exhaustion. "Hiya, sunshine," Richie beamed down at you, holding up a paper bag, offering, "donut?"
"Richie!? I know you're not fuckin' stupid, baby boy, so, what the fuck is wrong with you? It's six in the morning on my day off - do you want to give me a reason to punch you? You hate your nose that much?"
He tisked at you mockingly, "Someone's cranky this morning."
"What do you want?"
"You're not gonna invite me in for coffee? I brought us donuts! See? C'mon, Peach," He jostled the bag around with a shit-eating, closed-lip smile. "Dooonuts," he taunted.
You had to pause, count to ten in your head, then sigh through your nose. You offered kindly, "Richie? Would you like to come in for some coffee? Since you kindly brought donuts?"
He grinned, "Awwh, thanks, Peach, thats real nice of yah! Don't mind if I do!"
"Don't call me that," you snapped, leading him into your kitchen. The door shut and locked.
"Oh, someone's touchy."
"What do you fucking want?" You whined, pouring two mugs of hot coffee. "You come bangin' at my door, early ass in the mornin'. You better have a good-ass reason," you slid the mug over the counter he sat at. "Cream or sugar?"
He shook his head, fiddling with the mug for a moment before admitting as you dressed up your own coffee, "Uh, so... It's Carmy."
You paused, taking a slow sip from your mug, waiting for more that wouldn't come. So, you quietly asked, "What about Carmy?"
"He's falling apart."
"O...Kay?"
"Peach," he frowned, "you know that your relationship was the only thing that made sense to him - he's falling apart without you there."
"Okay," you nodded, taking another swallow of hot bean-water.
"That's it? Nothing else to say? Dude's losin' his fuckin' shit, Peach. Okay? Barely leaves the restaurant, h-he's all manic and shit, doesn't stop cookin', isn't gettin' a lotta sleep, and Syd said his clothes are all over the apartment - he's not keeping himself in order."
"So, he needs his mother?"
Richie glared with a clenched jaw, "Not fuckin' funny, Peach."
"I'm not laughing."
"He needs you."
"I'd argue otherwise, he's a grown fuckin' man who doesn't need to be taken care of. Look, if he was man enough to call me a desperate, clingy bitch, he's man enough to deal with the fallout of his words."
"Look, hey, hey, hey, I'm not sayin' he's not in the wrong," he waved his hands, eyes widening, "actually, the exact opposite. We all chewed his ass out when we found out what he fuckin' said, Peach. And look, I've never seen Fak that fuckin' angry."
You semi-pouted your bottom lip, "Really?"
"Fak was ready to strangle Carmy, I think," Richie sighed. "I yelled, Sugar yelled, Fak lost his shit, Syd even cornered him in the office and laid into him..."
"I thought she didn't like me," you whispered.
"She's getting to know you, but she likes you," he assured, "and it's obvious the affect you have on Carmy. We all respect that - "
"Oh, great, so everyone except the one person who needs to respect our relationship - respects it!"
Richie frowned at you, nodding in agreement before admitting, "He's a dumb fuckin' idiot, Peach, we all know that, but the dude is losing it without you."
"Sucks to suck."
"Peach," he groaned, slapping his hands to the counter with exasperation. "Don't you love him?"
"Of course I love him, but I also have this little thing called self-respect! He said some shit - shit he can't ever take back. The fuck I look like going back to him when he's the one in the wrong!? I don't hate myself that much, and despite what he says, I'm not that desperate for love."
"How is talking to the man you love - "
"Richie," you paused him, "your Cousin said a lot of hurtful shit. It's been weeks, okay? He's gonna snap outta it, realize what he's done, and right the wrongs he's committed. I don't need to speed that along in any way, shape, or form - he's a grown man. And I'm a grown woman, I don't have to fall to anyone's beck-and-call, he can figure his own shit out."
"I know - look, it's been fuckin' weeks of us dealin' with him losin' his fuckin' mind!" Richie snapped. "We tried to respect that you wanted distance and time, we really did, but he's losin' it, Peach, more than he's lost it before. Okay? I'm concerned about him, more than I was when the shit with Mikey went down..."
You sighed and leaned on your kitchen counter, wiping your fingers over your eyes to pinch the bridge of your nose after. "Okay, okay," you paused, sighing again, blinking as you looked at Richie, "so, what would you like me to do?"
He pouted dramatically, "Talk to him? Please?"
"To say... What?"
"I don't know, you guys can work that out together, but he's miserable, Peach. Just talk to him, just..." He sighed, shaking his head, "I know it's not fair to ask of you, but he's slippin' off the deep end. You're all he knows, all that makes sense to him, and with you gone..." His eyes turned red as he held back his tears, "I-I'm not sayin' he's gonna do anythin', Peach, but everythin' with Mikey's still so fresh... I just - I can't go through this again. Can't lose another Berzatto."
You frowned, understanding now why he appeared so frazzled.
"Carmy's not Mikey, Richie, okay?" You reminded him softly, reaching for his hand; leaving your extended to reach him, "And you're not gonna lose any more of us, you hear me?" You gave a squeeze, "I'll talk to him."
"Really?"
"I will," you assured softly, seeing the single tear drop from his waterline when he bowed his head and sniffled harshly. "Hey, Richie...? Do you, maybe, wanna bring some flowers to Mikey today? Think you wanna visit?"
He shrugged, "Maybe..."
"Maybe it'll be nice," you assured calmly. "It rained a few days ago, so, the ground won't be too soggy anymore, but the grass will be lush and green - hydrated and shit."
"Right," he chuckled, nodding, "yeah, okay, maybe that'll be nice, yeah, you're right."
"Maybe Carmy could use a visit, too."
"He won't go."
You nodded, "I know, but sometimes it's nice to just have the offer."
Richie agreed, downing the last of his black coffee. "All right," he cleared his throat, "let's go - you wearin' that?"
"What?"
"You gonna wear that? To go talk to Carmy?"
"It's not even seven in the morning!"
"He's at the restaurant," Richie shrugged. "Dude doesn't leave. C'mon, he needs a nap or somethin'."
You groaned, knowing he wouldn't leave unless you left with him. So, you got ready quickly while he sat at your desktop computer; playing Facebook's FarmVille - the same you left your little cousins to play when they needed distracted. He was enraptured by the adorable virtual sheep, laughing to himself as he learned the ropes of the game; and when you were ready, you had time to fill a to-go tumbler of coffee while he signed off.
When you arrived at The Beef, it was still closed for the morning prep; and inside, chaos rained in a fury of angry voices. You listened to Carmy snap at Marcus about something petty, going as far as to slap a pastry out of his hand as they argued in one another's faces with ignited passion.
"Ooookay," you moved through the kitchen and got between the two men, hands on Carmy's chest, "that's enough, Chef, hey, hey, hey, c'mon, walk away - just walk away, Carmy, don't do this. Hey, hey, don't do this, c'mon, just step off - walk away with me, please. Please, Carmy, hey, hey, step off, walk away with me, please."
"Fuck you doin' here, Peach?" He asked with red, swollen eyes. He looked sullen; pale between the angry red blotches to his skin, bags under his tired eyes, looking worn out and thinner than you remembered.
"Yeah, hey, hey, we'll talk about that, c'mon, outside, outside, outside," you directed him, sighing at the sight of the splattered pastry you were forced to step over. "I'm so sorry, Marcus," you whispered, seeing him nod and wave you off as you and Carmy pushed outside into the alley.
The door shut behind you, making Carmy snarl, "What the fuck, Peach - "
"No, I think that's better asked to you," you snapped. "The hell's wrong with you? Yellin' at Marcus like that? You know how rude it is to slap shit outta anyone's hand?"
He paced in anger, wiping a hand down his face; circling his mouth with his fingers, eyes ringed with red, hair greasy and tossed in a mess. His pants looked baggy, his shirt wrinkled, stained, and dirty with sweat marks.
"What're you doin' here?" He asked in a pant, hands going to his slender hips, head shaking as his tear-filled eyes avoided yours.
"Carmy, we need to talk."
"No shit," he breathed, scoffing after and widening his pace.
"Hey, Carmy, hey, hey," you reached for him, taking both his wrists in your grasp so he had to face you. "I need you to pause for me, please, hey," you stepped in his way when he tried to move. "Carmy, you're no good to anyone when you're like this - least of all yourself. So, I need you to talk - "
"You left," he panicked, pulling back to start pacing again. "You left - you left me. We got in a fight and you left, you fucking left. You walked away and you left me."
"Carmy, we got in more than a fight," you sighed. "You lashed out at me, then turned avoidant, and I don't linger where I'm not wanted."
"How can you think that?" He demanded, still pacing. "That you're not wanted by me? That you're not welcome, what? In my life? At my side? With me? Baby - of course, you are!"
"You didn't exactly make me feel any different," you pointed out sharply. "Carmy, can you please fucking pause for me so we can talk this out - "
"I know I fucked up," he ranted to himself, huffing and puffing as his emotion strangled him. "I know I did, I kept - I couldn't - I fucked up. I know I did. I couldn't get my head outta my ass," he listed, pacing as he panted when panic took hold of his being, "and I hurt you, and it was like I had to keep hurting you because I couldn't be alone in what I felt and I couldn't exactly figure out what the fuck I was feeling - I just needed you to hurt, too."
"Carmy," you sighed patiently.
"And I couldn't stop, I just kept going, and when I realized how bad I made it, I couldn't fucking stop - I needed y-yo-you t-to know what I felt, but I couldn't find the words. I-I hate that I did that, I-I fucking hurt you and I made this so much worse than it ever had t-to be, and I fucking know, Peach, okay? I know you're not clingy, you were just loving me. Y-You were loving me, you were using your own love languages, and I felt y-you so fuckin' close to me, and freaked out - I just - I just don't know why. I just - I panicked, I couldn't stop whatever I felt, and I'm so sorry," he breathed, shaking his head, wiping his cheeks as the tears started. "I-I-I'm so sorry, Peach, I couldn't control myself and I-I hate that I hurt you, and I know I don't deserve your understanding, but I just - I couldn't stop - "
"Carmy," you stepped directly in his footpath; needing to seize hold of his swollen biceps to catch his movements as he all but barreled right into you, "I need you to breathe."
"Nah, I'm okay - "
"No, you're not," you spoke sternly, shaking your head. "Baby," you eased your tone to a softer tone, seeing a glimmer of hope spark in his baby blues, "I need you to take a breath and remain in the present with me, okay? Just stand here with me," you watched as he blinked a couple of times; reaching out to hold your waist tentatively. "And stay in the present, okay? Stay here with me."
"I'm so sorry, Peach," he whispered, stepping closer so he could feel your breasts against his chest; caging you with his arms. "I'm so fuckin' sorry, I didn't - I didn't know what the fuck I was even trying to fight with you about. You're not clingy - you're not any of the things I said, I didn't mean it - any of it."
"Calling me desperate?"
"I didn't mean any of it."
"A bitch?"
"Please," he whispered, bringing you in closer so he could rest his forehead on yours. "Don't repeat it, I know what I said, and I'm so fucking sorry for all of it. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I'm goin' crazy without yah, Peach. I need my best girl, and I don't deserve you, but I fuckin' need you." He sniffled, pulling back to caress your cheek, whispering, "I need you, Peach, you're the only thing that I know - the only thing I can understand, that makes sense to me. I think I just felt stressed and overwhelmed, I wasn't sure what to do - I couldn't find the words, I'm so sorry."
You nodded slowly, "I think we can work through this."
"I don't deserve you."
"Maybe not, but you have me anyway," you whispered, bringing his forehead to your own again. "But you can't do this again, taking anger out on me when I haven't done anything."
"Never again," he sighed, now nestling into your neck for comfort; arms tightening so you were the closest you could be with your head bent to keep his head caressed with yours.
"I don't think we can say 'never', but we can make an effort to leave work stress at work, right?" You whispered softly, letting one around coil around him to keep him close; the other caressing his jaw. "You don't get to treat me like that," you reminded him, "because I'm on your side, Carmy, I'm not the enemy."
"I know," he squeezed you tight.
"And the people doing their jobs are not the enemy," you smirked.
"I know," he chuckled lightly. "I owe Marcus an apology..."
"I'm sure you owe it to the others, too," you mused, holding his cheek as you turned your head to kiss his forehead. "Promise me we're done with that reactive bullshit. It doesn't make navigating a relationship easier on us."
"We're done, we're so fuckin' done with that shit," he whispered, deflating into your embrace as you held him close. "I'm so sorry, baby. I really am."
"I know," you comforted softly. "I forgive you."
"I don't deserve it."
"Hey, hey, this self-deprecating stunt has to end, too. We've gotta go forward with at least some confidence if we're gonna figure this out together."
He nodded, pulling back but keeping hold of your waist. "I am confident about this... About you - about us."
"Hmm?" You gently pushed a few stray curls from his forehead.
"Move in with me - officially."
Your face contorted in mild disappointment, "Oh, Carmen - "
"No, no," he rushed, sighing as his hand flattened on your jaw and cheek again, "just listen to me. I've wanted to ask you for a long time, okay? I've wanted this for - like - fucking years. Hear me? I just," he sighed, "I wasn't sure how to ask. I want this for us, I want us to be together, okay? Officially. I-I want us living together, Peach, okay? I want to come home and just - I want you there. I want all of you," he frowned, tears swelling again, "and all your shoes in the foyer, hair in the shower drain, perfume on the counter, and every-single-way you know how to love me. I was wrong to say you were clingy - and everything else I said. Baby, the last couple weeks, I've felt so fucking empty, so lonely and - just - cold. I've been cold without you. I need you, Peach, I need you with me, and I need you to be exactly you - no holding back. Because you're exactly who I need to love me, I'm so sorry I fucked that up before."
"Carmy."
He frowned, "I'm sorry."
"I know," you smirked, "and I forgive you. But you know it's gonna take more than a few pretty words and some tears, right?"
He nodded, "Anything to make this work again."
You sighed in patience, "Go say your apologies to the others, we've got t'make a stop before going back to yours - and you're going to take a fucking nap."
"I'm fine - "
"Look me in my eye and try to tell me in the past 72 hours, you've had decent, restful sleep."
He frowned, opening his mouth a few times but then sighing. "You know I can't," he whispered.
"Exactly why we're going back to yours."
Carmy paused, brows furrowing as if a thread pulled them together. He asked softly, "Is that a no to us... Living together? Is that why you're calling it 'my' place?"
You offered him a look of patience and leaned in to peck his lips for a few prolonged seconds, promising, "There's your apartment, there's my apartment, and then there's gonna be our apartment. Somewhere that's just ours, 100% us." His mouth stretched in a grin, so you swiftly cut him off, "But you have to ask me again when you've got restful sleep under your belt. I want you clear headed when you make this kinda decision."
"Yes, ma'am," he agreed. "Where're we goin' before?"
You swallowed nervously, telling him softly, "You absolutely do not have to go with us, but I think Richie could use a visit out to Mikey's grave. I said I'd take him with some flowers, but you do not have to get out to go with us - not if you're not ready."
He blinked a few times, rolling his lips between his teeth as his eyes dropped from yours. You were about to coo his name and assure him again, when he nodded at you and tried to half-smile. "Okay," he breathed.
"Okay?"
"Mhm. I'll, uh... M-Maybe I can, just, hang back in the car."
"Sure, baby, whatever you're comfortable with," you whispered, leaning in to peck his forehead. "You good?"
"I will be."
"Mhm," you hummed, caressing his cheek again before pushing your hand into his curls. "Now, let's get a move on - I want you to march in there, say you're sorry to your Chefs, and then we'll leave."
"Yes, ma'am," Carmy whispered, leaning in to kiss you - but you pulled back.
"Aht," you halted him with a teasing finger to his lips, "after we've got everything worked out, then you can kiss me."
"You got t'kiss me," he mumbled against your finger; making you hum as you fought off a stretching smile, and lower your hand.
"Fair point - just one then - "
He cut you off by, indeed, pressing a single kiss to your lips, but not pulling back. His hand raised to hold the back of your head, your lips spreading in a grin against his; finding rhythm to move together before pausing to press in prolonged passion.
When he pulled back, you both paused to smile, and when you tried to peck his lips again, he pulled back, teasing, "Aht, just the one."
"Oh, fuck you," you laughed lightly, letting him take your hand before leading you back into the kitchen. The other Chefs lingered, sparing you and Carmy a few nervous glances, making you whisper in his ear as you squeezed his hand, "Go ahead, baby, get it done."
He nodded and called the kitchen to attention, clearing his throat, and beginning to make his apologies. He singled out Marcus, then Sydney, Richie, and Sugar; the kitchen staff all accepting his words and insisting he could take the day off - even the next few days if he wanted! You had to usher him to grab his things a few times, nudging him in reminder and verbally pushing him back into action. That boy's ADHD would truly be the death of him.
"So?" Richie smirked at you as Marcus handed you a packaged box of pastries.
"We're talking it out."
He chuckled, "Good. Get him outta here, Peach, dude needs to breathe."
"I got it," you swatted him away as Carmy exited the office. "But we've got somewhere to be first, right?"
He paused, then nodded and asked in a mutter, "He said okay?"
"He's got time to decide what he wants to do, but he knows we're going. C'mon, get your coat."
Richie met you at the front of the restaurant and with a parting wink to Sugar, you took Carmy's hand, tangled your fingers together, and left to venture to your parked car. Carmy got in the front, Richie in the back, and after a stop at a corner bodega to grab three bouquets of flowers, you drove to the cemetery. Carmy was silent, no music played, and Richie's leg bounced in anxious tension; making small conversation with you about your job in an effort to distract himself.
When you arrived, you pulled up on the access road that you knew was closest to Mikey's grave. Richie spared a glare between you and Carmy before muttering that he needed a cigarette and got out of the car to leave you alone. "Baby?" You whispered, reaching for his hand. "Hey, look, if you don't want to go with us, it's okay. We won't be long... But maybe you want to sign this," you showed him the small, blank name card left in the flowers.
"Why?" He whispered.
You shrugged, "So he knows they're from you."
"Peach," he sighed, meeting your eyes.
"Baby, I know it's silly, I know it's easier to ignore it all. But I'd like to believe it's just a nice gesture for our own closure - it's a signed gift from us, to them... And maybe it's nice to pretend that wherever they are, they know what we've left for them."
Carmy nodded slowly, "I-I don't think... I don't think I can go..."
"It's okay, baby," you whispered.
"But," he sniffled, opening his hand to you, "I'll sign it, if you'll leave it for me?"
"Of course," you rushed, opening your purse to producing a pen for him. The clank card rest on the center console of your car, pausing, swallowing nervously, then scribbling his name as he cleared his throat. He offered you the pen, waited until it was put away, then offered the flowers. "Hang tight, we won't be too long," you whispered, leaning in to rest your forehead. "You okay?"
He nodded, pecking your forehead before letting you get out of the car. You handed Richie his own flowers with a signed card, holding your own and Carmy's; linking arms with Rich to venture up the small grass hill and moved about halfway down the cemetery plot line. When you came to his stone, you understood this was what Rich needed more than you, so, you knelt and laid the two bouquets down before starting to quickly groom the area around his tombstone.
You told him, "I'm sorry it's not much, but I'll be back later for a picnic and a chat. I brought you flowers from me a-and from Carmy. He's in the car, but he's here, Mikey... Give him time," you whispered, brushing dirt from the stone before standing. "Take your time," you told Richie softly, seeing the tears gather in his eyes.
"Thanks, Peach," he whispered, offering you a tight hug. When you pulled back and started to walk away, Richie lowered himself to kneel and lay his own flowers down; hearing him tell Mikey, "Don't gotta worry 'bout us, Mike-Man, Peach is the glue that keeps us together. Shit, she even got Carmy out here..."
You made it back to the car and got in, smiling at Carmy - but dropping it the instant you saw tears in his eyes. "Talk to me," you whispered, reaching for a wet wipe in your glovebox to clean your hands after plucking the grass and brushing off dirt from the grave.
"Why can't I get out?"
You only stared at him for a long moment, unsure what to say.
"I'm here... I'm finally here... Why can't I get out?"
"You're not ready," you nodded, tossing the wipe aside to a plastic bag. "It's okay, Carmy, it's okay to not be ready yet. We can come back when you are," you reached for his hand.
"I think this added to my frustration," he admitted. "I couldn't... I didn't go to the funeral, haven't been here since he was... You know."
"Laid to rest."
"Yeah," he sighed. "Fuck's wrong with me?"
"You're grieving," you relented, nuzzling closer so your head rested on his shoulder. "It's not linear, Carmy, baby, just let yourself feel. When you try to repress your emotions, you lash out inappropriately."
"I know," he whispered, "'M sorry."
"It's not your fault," you promised, the two of you quietly bowing your heads together. You remained as such until Richie got back in the car, and from there, it was quiet as everyone stewed in their own emotion. You dropped Rich back at work before promising to call him later and driving away; heading for Carmy's apartment in the soothing silence, his hand locked in yours.
When you arrived at his apartment, you froze upon seeing the interior's state. "Oh, Carmy, no," you whispered, frowning deeply.
"Looks worse than it is," he deflected. You only hummed and let him lead you to the bedroom; watching him strip and prepare for bed before joining you on the mattress. He crashed almost immediately, sighing in relief as he pecked over your shoulder and collarbone, muttering, "'M so glad you're back. 'M so sorry, Peach."
"I know you are, and I forgive you," you told him softly, carding a manicured hand through his hair. "Just get some rest, baby."
He was asleep nearly instantly. He deflated on top of you, deeply resting enough to not notice you slip out from under him. You cleaned his entire apartment; doing laundry, cleaning, scrubbing, replacing necessities he deemed himself too lazy to pay attention to. You did dishes, cleaned out his fridge, and as you mopped up the floors, the sun set and Carmy emerged from the bedroom.
"Baby?" He mumbled in earnest confusion, sighing in relief when he saw you.
"What? Afraid I disappeared on you?" You teased with a small grin.
"For sure," he mumbled, wiping sleep from his eyes; making your amusement dim when you realized the nerve it struck. "The hell you doin'?"
"You didn't seriously think I could rest knowing this monster of a clean-up job lingered out here, did you?"
"I don't want you t'clean after me."
"Well, too late," you smirked. "You good now?"
"I feel better, yeah."
"Good."
"And I made up my mind."
"Hmm? About what?"
"I'm gonna take some time off work," he nodded, "and focus on us. Get us in a new crib, it'll be nice."
"Think you can handle that?"
He nodded, "I'll have to, you're the most important thing in my life, I can't lose you. So, if I gotta take time off, that's the least of my worries. I'm only here for us, for you."
You smiled at him, setting the mop aside to wrap him in your arms. "I like the sound of that, us making a home together - being able to decorate a new home. But don't let me overdo it, okay? I get all excited and kinda bulldoze my way through projects. I don't want you t'find real reason t'resent me."
"Nah, that ain't possible," he promised quietly.
True to his word, Carmy took three solid weeks off; agreeing to a fourth week as a contact-only consultant. You and he slept in most days, looking at apartments, and not once did he even mention work. He was diligent in his attention, focused on you and you alone; putting in overtime to rebuild that what was broke by focusing on shared interests again. You found a place you loved ready for what was basically immediate move-in, taking time to pack your respected places and prepare for the official start of your cohabitating relationship.
You didn't forget what he said, being reserved in your displays of love. Yet Carmy was different; he was totally clingy the moment you returned to his life. He feared letting you go meant you'd disappear again, feared you'd run away again. He held your hand at every possible opportunity, got you a fresh bouquet of weekly flowers, ran all his errands with you; never went to bed without you, cooked all meals with you in the kitchen - perched up on a counter. Most showers you took together, and almost every night was spent cuddling on the couch or in bed with either a book being shared between you or a new show playing on the mounted flatscreen TV.
Carmy clung because he thought if he showed you acts of his love, it'd allow comfort towards your loving behavior to flourish again - and he was right. It took a little bit of time, but Carmy clung tighter and tighter; ensuring you started to reciprocate before ever easing up in the intensity of his affectionate displays. He didn't want to overwhelm you, but knew you needed the reassurance.
You were cautious, you were apprehensive; tiptoeing around Carmy even when living together before warming back up to him. You didn't need to repeat the words he hurled at you all those weeks ago, not wanting to dredge up repressed feelings, but never letting him forget what he said. Your actions spoke enough, skittish around his affection; something Carmy took note of and despised himself for. He made up for it, of course he did, it was Carmy and he hated tension and conflict in his closest circles of life. Yet it wasn't so easy for you two to move forward, they weren't just words to you.
They were direct insults to you as a person; to you and how you loved others. Carmy had seen your deepest fear and used it as a defense against you - wanting you to hurt the way he was, too. He understood this wasn't acceptable, knowing the next time he resorted to such despicable actions, you'd simply walk away; never dealing with disrespect, so, he needed to be acutely aware of his words.
You would never allow yourself to be someone else's doormat, but part of being an adult is understanding that people were allowed to make mistakes - it's part of being fucking human. How terrible you'd feel if someone held your own mistakes against you, because the truth was, you weren't perfect either.
Part of being in a(n adult) relationship is understanding when someone apologized, it was best to accept and move on because nothing was ever solved by dragging turmoil out. This didn't mean forget what happened, forget whatever emotion was evoked - but to do your part to repair what was broken; no matter who was at fault, it always took Two to Tango.
And in this song and dance, you were ready to sweep around the dance floor if only with Carmy. Because that's what a relationship was; a conscious effort by both partners to work as one, to dance in-sync; owning the art together, as equal partners.
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#carmy berzatto#carmy the bear#carmy x reader#carmy berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto imagine#carmy berzatto angst#carmy berzatto fluff#carmy berzatto hurt and comfort#the bear#the bear fx#the bear hulu#carmen berzatto#carmen carmy berzatto#carmen berzatto x reader#carmen berzatto x you#carmen berzatto fic#carmen berzatto fanfiction#carmy berzatto x you#carmy berzatto x fem!reader#carmy berzatto x female!reader
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it's your fault for loving me — y. okkotsu ⁺˚⋆｡°✩
⟡ pairing: yuuta okkotsu x fem!reader
⟡ cw: /DARK CONTENT, /yandere! yuuta, /dubcon, /NONCON, ex-bf!yuuta, stalking, he breaks into your apartment, he /manhandles you (he’s strong), /implied babytrapping, /possessiveness, MINORS DNI
⟡ wc: 2.9k (someone sedate me)
⟡ song inspo: language by brent faiyaz
⟡ summary: Your ex boyfriend breaks into your apartment. What do you mean he needs to leave? He’s staying right here.
The slow, muffled drag of your feet ricochet off the hallway walls as you trudge along to your apartment. You fumble with your keys for a little bit, but find no resistance as you insert it into the slot.
“Huh, that’s odd…I could’ve sworn I locked it.”
You chalk it up to exhaustion. You're only practically ever home to sleep due to the way you've been throwing yourself onto mission after mission. Even now, sleep is a luxury you can barely afford. You kick off your shoes lazily, not bothering putting them in their rightful place on the shoe rack.
Maybe before, you would have cared more about keeping the house tidy. Or maybe before, your loving boyfriend would pamper and coddle you the minute you opened the front door, so you never had to worry about the little details like putting your shoes in the right place.
You were exhausted.
You wanted nothing more than to wash up and plop down onto your soft, soft bed. You don’t even make it to your bedroom door before you pause, anxiety prickling your nerves.
You sense him before you see him. Yuuta’s cursed energy has always had a tendency to seep out whenever he was around you. Whether it’s a testament to how he’s able to fully relax in your presence or a display of raw power, you’re not sure.
"You're home," a certain black-haired sorcerer chirps. "How was your mission?"
In the past, simply hearing Yuuta’s voice would be enough to melt away the pent up stress from a hard day of exorcizing curses. It’d soothe your aching muscles and tired soul as you let yourself be enveloped by the weight of his affection. But right now, it did everything except that.
The shiver of excitement that used to run down your spine is replaced by trepidation caused by the only person who used to be able to comfort you.
You know better than to ask how he knew you were on a mission, much less ask how he managed to break into your apartment. It seems he's been in here for a while, with the way he seems to have made himself at home on your bed, much like the way he used to before.
"Why are you here?"
The question makes him sit up.
“Because I missed you. Is that so bad?”
You want to laugh. The whole situation is all sorts of fucked up, and the two of you are talking about it the same way one would the weather.
“Yuuta, we broke up 2 months ago,” you press, vexation lacing your words. You could never imagine yourself using that tone on him. Yuuta’s always been so meticulous in loving you, in making sure you were happy. He’s never given you a reason to be upset with him. But that was then, and this was now.
You could say whatever you wanted to say. You were tired and definitely not in the mood to deal with a supposed burglar that happens to be in the form of your ex-boyfriend.
“I don’t remember agreeing to that,” he says simply.
“You walked out on me!”
“Because I thought you needed some space. And now I’m back. But I never said we were breaking up.”
Space was an extremely generous term for what Yuuta gave you. If you could consider watching your every move from a distance, keeping tabs on who you talk to, and making sure you stay out of trouble secretly, “space.” He would never let you know that though. It’s too much, too soon.
He couldn't help it, not when his precious baby could get hurt. He’d never forgive himself if that happened.
“Come and sit, my love. You look so tired.” He pats the space next to him. You will your heart not to flutter at the familiar nickname.
Your body moves before your brain can catch up. It’s almost like listening to him was muscle memory. You pause in your step, cross your arms, and glare at him.
“Leave, Yuuta. I don’t want to see you.” The words rise from the very depths of your soul and spill out of your mouth like bile, burning and spiteful. It hurts to speak to him like this, even after he’d abandoned you with no hopes of return.
“Sit, love.” A little more demanding this time. “I’m not repeating myself again.”
The tension in the air is palpable, so thick you can cut it with a knife.
You take a seat. Yuuta doesn’t miss a beat before he has his hands on you.
“Missed you,” his hand reaches out to cup your jaw, thumb rubbing against the plushness of your cheek.
You’ve always been so soft, it’s one of the things Yuuta loves the most about you.
You flinch. Blame it on the adrenaline coursing through your body like wildfire. Your fight or flight response is shot. Yuuta’s touch seems to rewrite everything that’s been hardwired into your brain.
He presses a chaste kiss to your temple, before moving down to kiss the tip of your nose, and both of your cheeks. Each press of his lips leaves feels like it’s being seared into your flesh, a metaphorical branding iron of sorts— to show that you’re Yuuta’s and Yuuta’s only.
Your mind goes blank when he sucks a kiss into the side of your neck, whimpering pathetically as he grazes his teeth along the sensitive skin.
“We can’t do this,” you assert, but the words get stuck in your throat, so it comes out more as a whiny sigh. Your body seems to have a tendency to betray you when it comes to him.
“But we can,” Yuuta coos, pushing you down until your back is flat against the mattress. He takes both of your hands in his, lifting them up until they’re above your head, effectively pinning you in place. “We’re doing it right now, aren’t we?”
Yuuta can appear pretty unassuming to outsiders. He’s quiet, reserved, almost meek. If one were to take a closer look, however, they’d realize that beneath that unostentatious front was a more commanding aura, one that forces you to submit to his whims with his sweet tongue and sensuous touches. Perfectly calculated, perfectly executed.
"I fucking hate you,” you spit, thrashing against his hold, but to no avail.
"No you don't,” Yuuta shuts you down with conviction. Like it’s the absolute truth— the kind that can’t be twisted or broken. It almost feels like he’s chastising you for thinking otherwise. “Take that back right now.”
To be honest, hearing those words stung more than any physical blow you could have ever landed on him. Has he not shown you enough love? Or have you already forgotten?
Isn’t what you have pure love?
A hand wraps around your neck, lithe fingers inching up before they grip your jaw, forcing you to look at him. “I said,” blunt fingernails digging into your skin, “take it back.”
You sputter out an apology with teary eyes, an odd mix of humiliation and regret seeping into your bones, stomach swirling with shame and to your horror, a tinge of anticipation.
It’s pathetic, really, how easily you give in.
“Now give me a kiss, sweetheart.” Yuuta bridges the gap between the two of you. He presses his already throbbing bulge against your clothed pussy, moaning into your mouth appreciatively.
You feel so dizzy you think you might explode.
Yuuta makes quick work of the buttons on your uniform, releasing your wrists so he can throw the offending garment and all your underthings beneath it to some random corner of the room.
Calloused hands roam your body, squeezing and groping, as if to map out the cartography of your flesh, committing each peak and valley to memory. He watches in fascination how your skin bristles with goosebumps in the wake of his touch.
He ignores your pleading cries and attempts to push him off. Yuuta is being driven by pure instinct alone. That sick, twisted voice in his head that he’s always tried to suppress whispers. It goads him on to take what he wants, to make sure you remember that you’re his, and his alone.
He knows that you haven’t been seeing anyone. You were always so loyal, even when you were upset with him. Anyone who did try was taken care of the minute they left your sight.
It’s been far too long since he’s had you. His desire fills him with a sort of quiet rage, one that metamorphoses into something darker, more sinister and morose the longer he goes without you. Almost like a curse that’s gone far too long without feeding.
Yuuta Okkotsu loves you to the point of madness.
He thinks he might literally implode in on himself any second longer without you.
It’s almost laughable how different the two of you are. An ethereal beauty too good for this world, yet here you were in between the legs of a cursed man with too much love than he knows what to do with.
“Yuuta, please,” you cry out. You flail your legs in an attempt to kick Yuuta off. He catches both with ease, throwing them over his shoulder to slide your bottoms off, leaving you completely bare.
He can’t suppress the groan that tumbles past his lips. You’re even more beautiful than he remembers.
You’re dewy eyed and gasping, nails clawing at his forearms and beating at his chest in a last ditch effort to stand your ground. Nothing can deter him.
Yuuta could easily heal himself if he wanted to. But the angry red welts and blossoming hues of purple on his pale skin are a badge of honor of the utmost prestige. It’s undeniable proof that you’re real, that his love for you isn’t just a fragment of his imagination, and that none of this was just some pipe dream. He could take a little pain if that meant you got to be his.
He’s always been yours without any reservations.
“You can cry if you want, if it helps,” he says genuinely, but the gleam in his eyes shifts into something predatory. “But you should know you’re really fucking wet.” As if to prove a point, he slowly fucks his middle finger into your weeping hole, then his index, then his ring. They curl up to rub against that spongy spot just the way you like.
You let out a sharp gasp, spine arching off the mattress.
You tried to ignore him—detach yourself from the whole situation, let him get his fill, and be done with this whole ordeal. But it’s Yuuta— the man has a grasp on both the corporal and spiritual parts of you that you can’t bring yourself to understand. It seems like he knows you better than you know yourself sometimes. And right now, he’s managed to make a home in all five of your senses. There’s no escape. He's made sure of that.
He pulls out his fingers with a lewd squelch. A clear sheen of liquid coats every digit, stringy as he parts them to show you. He smiles knowingly.
“You keep fighting me, but it turns out you want it after all, sweetheart.”
Your cheeks burn in humiliation. Whether it’s from the situation at hand or the truth behind his words, you’re not too sure.
“Don’t you know?” Yuuta rasps, fingers going back to work their way inside you rhythmically, bringing you closer and closer to the precipice, paying special attention to how you try to mask how your face contorts in pleasure.
He presses his forehead against yours, willing you to look at him wordlessly. “I know what’s best for you. I know what you want. And right now, this little pussy wants to be fucked. Isn’t that right, my love?”
He’s met with a breathless moan. You’re so close. Tears threaten to fall as your chest heaves in exertion, trying not to teeter off the edge too soon.
You look so pathetic it’s insane. Yuuta swears he can feel his mouth water in anticipation for what’s bound to come next. He thrusts his fingers with calculating speed and precision, the heel of his palm slapping against your neglected clit just right.
He leans down right when you cum, lips catching yours as you moan into his mouth. Satisfaction swells in his chest as your slick drips down his wrist.
“You’re ready.”
Yuuta unbuttons his pants, pulling it down just enough for his cock to spring free, tip slapping his abdomen as it leaks with precum. He fists it, jerking his hand up and down his length. He slaps it against your clit once, twice, and a third time before he slips it inside your weeping hole.
Your walls spasm around his cock to accommodate his sheer size and girth, struggling a bit more than usual. You feel so full. It’s been far too long since he’s fucked you. You claw at his lower abdomen, trying to make space between the two of you. It’s all too much, all at once. Yuuta won’t have it. He slips his hands under your sweaty thighs, pinning your ankles on either side of your head, effectively folding you in half. You cry out at the stretch.
“Always take me so well, angel.”
He sets a steady pace, dragging his cock in, pulling out, and then back in with an absurd amount of force. The sound of skin on skin ricochets against your bedroom walls like a sort of cacophonous symphony. You don’t get the luxury of the sweet, slow thrusts he usually blesses you with, while he coos about how good you are for him.
“Where’s all that attitude from earlier? Am I making you feel that good?”
You glower, refusing to acknowledge the fact that your body betrays your mind— that Yuuta’s bringing you closer and closer to nirvana the further he drags you down into hell.
He slides his hand down your tummy, rubbing your clit in time with his thrusts.
“Yuuta—!” You clench around his length, hurtling towards your second orgasm quickly.
“You’re so greedy. Cumming again already?”
He’s met with silence. He’ll forgive your transgressions this time around. He’ll just have to teach you how to be his good girl again.
A particularly rough thrust has you choking back a moan.
“Thought so. Cum for me, sweetheart.”
Your peak hits you like a crashing wave. Your body tenses, leaving you gasping for air as you clench around Yuuta’s cock. You cry out deliriously, falling apart as Yuuta continues to pound into you. It’s too much, but you can’t pull away even if you tried. You’re stuck.
“I’m the only one that can make you feel this way, understand?” He grits his teeth, staving off his release just a little longer. He fucks you through your orgasm thoroughly as he chases his own.
He presses all of his body weight on top of you, your legs on either side of his head as he folds you into a mating press. He groans at the change in position, allowing him to fuck into you even deeper.
Realization cuts through your cloudy judgment like a sword.
“Yuuta— Yuuta, please. Pull out–!”
Your pleas fall on deaf ears. He’s rambling now, intoxicated by all you have to offer, yet you’re the one paying the price. The effects of overstimulation are taking over now, your body twitching involuntarily with each thrust.
“I’m not leaving you, ever. It’s just you and me.”
You shake your head in objection, mind too hazy to voice out any resistance. Tears well up, threatening to spill from your lash line.
Yuuta nods with a grin, canines glinting, just like a predator that’s caught its prey. “It’s true, sweetheart. I’ll make sure of it. Say I’m it for you. That I’m the only one.”
“Say it.”
“You’re it for me, Yu. The only one.” You babble, tears streaming freely now.
You feel the moment he reaches his plateau— the way his dick twitches inside of you right before your walls are being painted white with splashes of Yuuta’s hot cum.
Your fate’s been sealed.
He fucks into you a few more times, heavy balls slapping against your ass as he rides out his orgasm. A white ring wraps around the base of his cock, the copious amounts of seed he’s poured into you threatening to leak out.
Yuuta doesn’t bother pulling out. In a quick show of dexterity and freak strength, he manages to flip the both of you so that your positions are switched, with you lying on top of Yuuta’s chest. The steady beat of his heart fills your mind.
Your entire body is on fire. You feel numb. You let yourself be carried away by the prospect of sleep, hoping that you’ll wake up to find that this was all just some wild fragment of your imagination.
He presses a hand against your head, like he was afraid you’d pull away and ruin whatever fantasy he’s deluded himself into believing.
The simple truth is– Yuuta Okkotsu loves you. And he’ll do whatever it takes to make sure that no one else gets in the way of that.
He runs his hand up and down your bare back lovingly, admiring your spent form. You’ve always been so soft. So pliant, so willing to give in to his desires.
It’s the thing that Yuuta loves most about you.
a/n: i had to reupload bc this hellsite sucks. hopefully this shows up in the tags now
tagging @princess-okkotsu again hehe
#i do not wish to be perceived#yuuta x reader#yuuta x you#yuuta x y/n#yuuta okkotsu x reader#yuuta okkotsu x you#yuta x reader#yuta x you#yuta x y/n#jjk x reader#jjk x you#/dubcon tw#/noncon tw#/babytrapping tw#/yandere tw#/stalking tw#/possessiveness tw#kat’s writing#kat’s demon time
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omg can you make a chris version to the talkative fic? my english isn’t very good i apology if this doesn’t make sense!
Talkative- C. Sturniolo
pairing: Yapper!reader x Boyfriend!Chris
classification: SFW & NSFW headcannons
inspiration: request^^
warnings: some 18+ content, use of y/n, established relationship
summary: head cannons of Chris with a talkative, yapper girlfriend!
Talkative- M. Sturniolo (Matt’s Version)
Talkative- N. Sturniolo (Nick’s Version)
—
☆ SFW
You love to talk and that’s something Chris has loved about you from the moment he met you. He, much like you, is extremely extroverted, but every girl he’s talked to in the past has always found him to be too much. You’re his perfect match and although he also likes to talk, he loves to listen too.
☆ Chris never gets tired of hearing you talk, “Babe tell me the story about the teddy bear again.”
☆ You retell stories in such a detailed way that he can’t help but burst into laughter even if he’s heard it before.
☆ When you talk about your friends, it’s like you’re explaining their lore in full detail each time.
☆ “No, babe, that was Savannah. I’m talking about Teala,” or “Dude, I’m telling you that’s why they fired that bitch.”
☆ He has all the characters memorized, even categorizing their lives into arcs, episodes, and seasons.
☆ “Wow Teala is in her villain arc,” and “On this weeks episode of, Who the Fuck is Getting Fired!”
☆ He loves asking you questions because you somehow know the answer to everything.
☆ You’ll be eating dinner and suddenly a random question will pop into his mind, “Y/n, what does litigate mean? I heard someone use it today, sounded fancy.”
☆ You look up at him mid bite, slightly confused but also intrigued at a new topic of conversation.
☆ “I think it has something to do with the law, I don’t know, babe. But one time I heard someone say that on one of those court shows…” you drone on for a while.
☆ Chris always Googles the answers afterwards, not because he doesn’t believe you, but because he truly thinks you’re the smartest person on this planet and you haven’t been wrong yet.
☆ You’re both equally insane, you’ll laugh like crazy people no matter where you are.
☆ You tell the best jokes too, your mind works so fast that you’re able to create comebacks and quick, witty remarks to everything he says.
☆ Sometimes you’ll join him and his brothers on grocery trips, and the both of you wander off just completely in your own world.
☆ You’re the only person who can catch Chris off guard.
☆ You’ll say something completely unexpected and outlandish, causing him to pause whatever he’s doing and stare at you in shock.
☆ “Babe! No way you just said that.”
☆ “I said it, and I’ll say it again.”
☆ When you’re with friends, you tend to talk over each other and your friends almost break their necks switching their attention between you and Chris.
☆ To other people it might seem like you’re fighting each other for the spotlight, but in reality you’re able to bounce off each other’s energy and add on to whatever the other says.
☆ He knows what it’s like to be called annoying, so if anyone ever makes you feel uncomfortable for being talkative he defends you without hesitation.
☆ “Watch your fucking mouth. Don’t say shit like that about her.”
☆ Every conversation you have is full of inside jokes that no one else can keep up with, and it’s literally something new every week.
☆ Although other people are confused by the jokes, you and Chris understand each other fully, almost like you speak your own made up language.
☆ You make each other laugh so hard that your cheeks and ribs will start hurting.
☆ “Chris stop! I’m gonna pee,” you wheeze, rolling over on your side as you try to catch your breath.
☆ He keeps going though, making you laugh harder by making silly faces and funny voices through his story.
☆ After long days of filming and being away from you, he’ll cuddle up next to you in bed and murmur through the drowsiness, “Talk to me baby.”
☆ You know he’s tired so you don’t talk his ear off at a high energy, you just retell your day and play with his hair, kissing his face between sentences.
☆ He loves the sound of your voice, each word as sweet as honey, instantly lulling him into a peaceful sleep.
☆ You’re very opinionated and sometimes you say something he disagrees with, instantly creating a debate between the two of you.
☆ The debates always start off innocent, just you two going back and forth with opinions and the occasional fact.
☆ It’s not until it gets personal that Chris gets upset, giving you the silent treatment until you’re begging for him to talk to you again.
☆ “Chris, I’m sorry! Just talk to me, I’m so bored without you!” He tries putting on a tough guy act, but it never lasts long so he’s forgiving you within seconds.
☆ When you’re around older people, they always comment on what a nice, kind couple you two are because you engage in conversation with everyone.
☆ “What a nice old lady,” Chris says, slinging an arm around you as you both walk away.
☆ “Such wisdom,” you chime in, both of you falling into a fit of laughter. You could never take anything serious.
☆ NSFW
☆ Chris knows not to look too into your conversations with other guys, but sometimes he can’t help but get jealous.
☆ He’ll lose you at a party and find you talking to a stranger, an excited aura surrounding you as you jump from topic to topic.
☆ When he sees the guy becoming too comfortable and touchy, he makes his way over to you and inserts himself in the conversation.
☆ Later, he’s fucking you to teach you a lesson and clamping a strong hand over your mouth to keep you quiet, “This dirty little mouth of yours got you in trouble, Princess.”
☆ Other times he just gets turned on by your voice.
☆ He wants you to talk him through the sex and guide him on what positions you want.
☆ “C’mon baby, tell me how bad you want it.”
☆ Despite you both being talkative, there’s times when you’re so fucked out you’re speechless.
☆ The only sound that fills the room is skin slapping and Chris’s animalistic grunts, followed by your whimpers and small squeaks.
☆ He relishes in it, “This dick has you speechless, huh?”
☆ All he gets in response is a whimper, as you claw at his back for support.
☆ Chris loves when you dirty talk him, using your words to say filthy things to him.
☆ It riles him up beyond belief, and if you keep it going he’s lasting at least 3 rounds.
☆ Afterwards, he loves cuddling or spooning, both of you talking for hours about your future together.
—
MASTERLIST
A/n:
Happy birthday to me! (It was yesterday at this point)
Thank you for this request and NEVER apologize for your English/ grammar. I’m a bilingual education major and I firmly believe you don’t need to apologize for that EVER. I luv u!
Also I’m bilingual (English & Spanish) If any of yall ever want to send in a request in Spanish, go ahead bbys! LOS AMO 💋💋💋
Lastly, I’ll admit that this was harder to write than Matt’s version idky
- L.A.M.B👼🏻💗
—
taglist: @nicksmainbitch @sturniololovers @mayhem-72 @worldlxvlys @gnxosblog @meg-sturniolo @creamoncreamoncream2 @mattnchrisworld @sanyi5 @lustfulslxt @whicked-hazlatwhore @tworosesblackthorn @mxqdii @fawned01 @junnniiieee07
note: if you want to be tagged in my fanfic related posts, you can access my TAGLIST and comment 💐
#teapartyanonreqs✨💗#christopher sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo imagine#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo x reader#chris x y/n#chris#chris sturniolo oneshot#chris sturniolo x you#chris sturniolo#chris x reader#christopher sturniolo#christopher sturniolo fanfic#christopher owen sturniolo#christopher sturniolo x y/n#Christopher sturniolo headcannon#matt sturniolo#sturniolo#nick sturniolo#chris sturniolo headcanon#chris sturniolo fluff#chris sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo x reader#matthew x reader#matt x y/n#matt x reader
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[4.5K] Steve Harrington x fem!reader 18+
A/N: sorry, no advent blurb today as we’re v tired and v sick and writing doesn’t sound fun. but please have an old fic that was once on the masterlist
“This is a bad idea,” you whispered, shy, nervous, wanting to curl into yourself.
Steve stayed still behind you, your back to his chest, his legs bent and framing your own. His hand stroked over your knee, a safe distance, one that didn’t add too much pressure to the situation. The boy pressed a kiss to your cheek, nose nudging your temple. “We can stop, if you want.” His voice was quiet and filled with soft sincerity. “It’s okay.”
But you’d asked for this, face flushed, squirming on Steve’s bed sheets ‘cause how on earth did you go from watching Fast Times at Ridgemont High to talking about sex to telling your best friend you’d never had an orgasm?
“What?” He’d asked, face soft with shock. “What about those six months you dated that guy, whatshisface? Liam?”
“Lewis,” you’d corrected, fingers pulling uncomfortably at the blanket Steve kept at the end of his bed for you. “And no, he just couldn’t get me there, I guess. Maybe it was me. It’s gotta be me, I can’t even make it happen myself.”
Steve had paused at that, looking at you with parted lips and soft eyes ‘cause you looked so sad, so frustrated, defeat taking over from the embarrassment you’d felt in admitting such a thing.
“It’s not you,” he’d said, determined. “He should’ve taken his time with you or— or, found out what you liked.”
You huffed out a laugh at that, humourless and tired. You shrugged, hands falling into your lap. “How’s that fair when I don’t even know what I like myself?”
You don’t know what happened after that. Just that the movie was paused and the evening outside turned to night, Steve’s blue room turning navy in the shadows, the dull glow of his bedside lamp making your bare legs turn apricot and rosy in the light. His hand looked so big against your knee, like he could swallow you whole.
You asked him. Voice quiet, words making the boy’s cheeks turn pink. Asked him to help, to show you, to tell you what you were doing wrong which sounded so ridiculous, because Jesus Christ, it was your body, for fuck sake.
You sucked in a deep breath. “No, it’s fine. I’m just— being stupid. We can keep going.”
You felt Steve relax a little behind you, his body sinking into the pile of pillows at his headboard, your body falling into his in turn. His thumb drew circles on the side of your knee, a touch you’d felt before: during a horror movie in the dark of the cinema, in the front seat of his car when you cried about a boy who wasn’t him, when he’d argued with his dad and you piled yourself into his lap for comfort.
“Are you sure?” Steve whispered and his voice was right by your ear, lips almost touching the shell of it. It made you shiver, spine tingling. “And you’re not stupid. This, the way you feel. It’s not stupid, okay?”
You realised he was waiting for you to answer him, so you nodded, chest tight at his earnest words, always trying to make you feel better. He’d once told you when you were both only thirteen, that that was his job and he’d proven it true ever since.
“Yeah, m’sure.” You let your head rest against his, cheek to his chin, day old stubble rough against your skin. “Thanks, Steve.”
A silence swept over you both, not exactly uncomfortable but not an easy one either, not like it usually was. ‘Cause your skirt was hitched up high, the hem of it falling towards the tops of your thighs when you’d bent your knees and sat between Steve’s legs. He’d patted the space there and your body had burned, but you’d obeyed all the same. His thumb was still rubbing circles and your hands lay awkwardly in your lap until finally, finally, Steve took them in his own and placed them flat over your thighs, his bigger ones covering your fingers.
“So you’ve never, ever—?”
“No,” you whispered it back, like a dirty secret. Something to be ashamed about. “Can't even manage it myself… it’s— fuck, I don��t know.” You choked off your own words, heated embarrassment creeping up the back of your neck.
Steve squeezed your hands, gentle, soothing. “S’okay. Do you, uh, do you try? A lot?”
He sounded nervous too and suddenly you were thankful for this position, eyes hidden from each other, knowing his cheeks would be flushed, too pretty to look at. You sucked in a breath and nodded. “Sometimes, yeah. I guess. It’s just— I either get interrupted or it doesn’t feel right and then the times when it does, I just can’t… can’t. You know.”
“Finish?” Steve supplied helpfully.
You nodded again.
“Okay, uh, why don’t you— do you wanna, try? Show me?” You heard him swallow audibly, Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat and you felt his jaw tense against your temple, where you were leaning against him.
You stiffened, and Steve felt that too, so he tangled his fingers between your own and used his thumb and yours to skim up and down your legs. You wondered if he noticed how warm you were, if he realised you were running so much hotter than before.
“It’s just me,” he whispered to you, head ducked tucked down so he words fell into the crook of your neck. He sounded so soft, familiar, like the sixteen year old who’d picked you up from your shitty first date and told you that the next boy that hurt you would have to deal with him. “Do you trust me?”
You licked your bottom lip, mouth dry but you made a noise of agreement. “Yeah, I trust you.” You felt his smile, felt the affection ripple through him and back into you, ‘cause you really, really did. More than anyone, you thought.
“We can stop whenever you want, alright?” Steve said and you bobbed your head, suddenly feeling clumsy, fingers too small between his own, legs splayed out like a broken down China doll. You dug your toes into the mattress and breathed out. “Show me.” Steve whispered again. “Show me what you do.”
It took a second, maybe five, for your heart to stop rattling against your chest, for your bones to stop vibrating. But you took one hand from Steve’s and pressed it between your thighs, hidden under your skirt. Your underwear was still very much on and you were unsure how to go about that, so you squeezed your eyes shut and tried to find your clit the best you could under the cotton, shifting your fingers over the fabric.
Then Steve tsked, a soft sound that didn’t come across as reprimanding as it should’ve, but between that and his hand catching yours again, you stopped, unsure.
“You normally just dive right in like that?” Steve murmured, rubbing his thumb over your knuckle. “Christ, you gotta be nicer to yourself, babe, you need to relax more.”
“I do?”
Steve laughed quietly, a huff of spearmint breath falling across your cheek and wasn’t unkind, it didn’t make you shrink like you thought it would’ve. “Well, yeah,” Steve answered. “You gotta warm yourself up, right? Get in the mood. Hasn’t anyone taken their time with you? Made you feel like, uh, like putty?”
“Putty?” Your lips kicked up at the corners, lashes fluttering as your eyes closed, happy to listen to Steve and the smile in his voice. He sounded shy, and it was lovely, it made you feel better, warmer, ready for what was happening.
“Yeah,” he huffed. “You know, all gooey n’shit. Nice. Relaxed.” Steve sucked in a breath and pressed your joined hands to your thigh, his so much wider and covering much more skin. “You’re real cute, babe, someone’s gotta treat you the same way.”
“No,” you shook your head, trying not to sound too sad about it, ‘cause Steve’s hand on your bare skin was starting to make you feel real nice, warm, just like he was describing. Except you were anything but relaxed, heartbeat a livewire racing through your bones, a new pulse thrumming, stomach jumping at each touch. “You think I’m cute?”
You weren’t sure why you asked that, but suddenly, you were desperate to know.
“You kiddin’?” Steve said and you could hear the smile there, the one you knew so well. He leaned in, chin hooked over your shoulder when he felt you settle back against him, body more lax than before. His lips brushed your cheek when he spoke. “You’re the cutest girl in town, d’you not know that?”
You squirmed, too pleased with his comment but embarrassed all the same. Steve always gave you too much attention but it was the way it had always been, a little flirting over the diner table, his hand on the small of your back when you walked through too big crowds, an offered cheek for you to kiss goodbye when he dropped you home after school.
“Shut up,” you whispered, voice thick and quiet and caught in your throat. You didn’t mean that. You didn’t want him to shut up at all. And Steve knew that.
“Now, if you’re the cutest thing in all of Hawkins,” he continued, emboldened by the way you tucked your head into the crook of his neck, letting your fingers go soft between his own. “Don’t you think you gotta be nice to yourself?”
Your breath stuttered and hitched in your chest and despite the nerves that still pinballed around in your stomach, your thighs dropped open a little, the hem of your skirt hitching higher still and Steve swallowed down a curse.
“I don’t think I know how.” It was embarrassing, admitting it, cheeks on fire, nose scrunched even though Steve couldn’t see.
His hands swept up your thighs, taking yours with them, stopping short of creeping under your skirt before retreating back down to your knees. “Like this,” the boy whispered. “See? Nice and sweet. Slow.”
You wanted to let your hands fall away, wanted to feel Steve’s rough fingertips and wide palms span over your skin but when you tried to pull away, Steve only tightened his grip. “Ah, ah, c’mon. You can’t learn if I do it for you.”
There was a whine stuck in your throat; a bratty, moody noise that you didn’t dare let out in fear of being teased by the boy for all of entirety but Steve seemed to sense your frustration anyway.
“C’mon, you got this.” Steve pressed a quick kiss to wherever he could reach, a warm smack of his lips against the skin under your ear, right by your jaw. “Relax, remember?”
So you did, letting out a small sigh before sinking back into him, legs widening and letting Steve drag your hands up and down your thighs, your skin erupting in goosebumps every time you felt a particularly rough graze of Steve’s short nails.
“What d’you think about?” He asked, voice hushed, almost hoarse. It sounded dirty, like a secret you weren’t supposed to tell anyone else about. “When you touch yourself? What d’you think about?”
You pressed your lips together and shrugged, a gasp wrenching out from you when Steve moved your hands inwards, to the softer dough of your thighs, creeping higher and higher until you felt the cotton and lace edge of your underwear against your fingertips.
“I dunno,” your voice didn’t sound like your own. “Someone else, I guess. Someone’s fingers, instead of my own. Being— being kissed and their, their mouth. Lips. Tongues.”
If Steve’s hips twitched up into your own, you were sure you’d imagined it. But he took a second before he answered, nodding so his nose pressed into your cheek, his hair fell over your own.
“S’good,” he agreed, praising you like any teacher would. “What about their mouth, huh? Where d’you want it?”
You squirmed, face on fire, teeth chewing something rotten at your poor bottom lip and when you didn’t answer, Steve took your hand and placed it over your cunt, the cotton there suddenly more damp than it was before. You wanted to throw yourself out the window. Or worse, at Steve.
“Here?” The boy suggested. He wasn’t really touching you, just his hand over your wrist and fingers, guiding, pressing slightly. “Has someone done that to you? Has someone put their mouth here?”
You shook your head, unable to stop the little whine that came out with it, disappointment colouring the sound. Steve tutted, cooing at you with sympathy and he let out a stuttered sigh when you took it upon yourself to press two fingers closer to your clit, seeking out some friction.
“That’s a real shame, you know that?” Steve’s hands left yours, only to grasp your waist and pull you back into him a little firmer and you’d be lying if you didn’t feel him, hard under his jeans, pressed into the bottom of your back.
It only made you press your fingers into yourself harder.
“It is?” You were breathless, each word a huff of air, face screwed up and eyes shut tight as you tried to work out where you wanted your fingers the most.
“Fuck, yeah it’s a shame, babe.” Steve whispered. “Told you, didn’t I? You’re the sweetest girl there is. And someone’s not tasted you? Not told how sweet you really are?” Steve blew out a breath, as if exasperated. “That’s just unfair.”
“Steve.” You weren't sure what you were whining your best friend's name for. For release? Permission? Guidance? All of the above, maybe.
But Steve seemed to know, ‘cause he nudged your hand closer to your cunt, coaxed you into running your fingers over your cotton covered folds. “Yeah?” He asked and his voice was hoarse, a little wrecked sounding. “Ready for more? Feelin’ good?”
You nodded, clumsy, breath coming out a little heavier than before.
Steve let one finger flirt with the edge of your underwear, along the lace trim where your cunt met your thigh and he snapped the elastic against you, feeling brave when you pressed back against him, like you couldn’t be close enough.
“Want these off?” You heard him swallow hard, sounding quieter than before. “Don’t have to, if you don’t want to. We can do whatever—”
You lifted your hips in answer, one hand holding onto Steve’s thigh for support as the other dragged down your underwear and your cheeks cringed with heat as you caught a glimpse of how wet the cotton was. You balled them into your fist, shoving them to the bottom of Steve’s bed and they lay there like a flashing neon sign, all lilac and buttercream coloured flowers, lacy and mortifying.
Your skirt still covered you, hiding a lot from Steve. But the boy could look over your shoulder and see the way your chest heaved, nipples pebbled underneath your T-shirt, the one you’d stolen from him freshman year and made into a crop top. You were all legs, soft thighs, socked feet digging into his duvet, skirt flirting dangerously with all that bare skin underneath. He tried not to rut up into you, but he knew you had to feel him by now, his hard cock pressed against your spine, twitching at every breathy noise you let out.
“What next?” You asked and you sounded desperate, more pent up than you’d ever felt before and you wondered if it was really because you were taking your time with it, if all these slow touches really worked. You wondered if it was Steve. “Should I just—?”
Your fingers dug into your thighs, sitting over your skin alone ‘cause Steve was gripping at his own knees, knuckles white on the denim. “Fuck,” his voice cracked. “Just, uh, do what feels good, yeah?”
You made a sound of protest, frustration spilling up and out of your throat because this is where it went wrong, fingers fumbling, unsure where to touch to be able to coax you over the edge.
“Hey, hey, s’alright,” Steve assured you, whispering again. “Give me your hand.”
You did, without hesitation, and together, with Steve’s fingers twisted between your own, he guided your touch underneath your skirt. You held your breath as you felt your own fingers - and the boy’s - slip between your folds, your legs parting automatically for him. You felt his breath hitch and fall over your cheek as you let out a tiny moan, urging him on, your fingers following his as he swept up and down your cunt, gathering up the slick there before pressing your middle finger to your clit.
“Yeah?” Steve asked and he sounded awed when you cried out, a soft grunt that made him see fucking God. “That good?”
You could barely speak. “Yeah,” you whispered on a breath, head lolling back to rest against his shoulder, giving Steve an unobstructed view down your front, to the way your hands could be seen between your thighs, skirt rucked up around them.
“Atta’ girl, keep doin’ that, okay?”
You did as you were told, adding your pointer finger to the mix, rubbing the two digits over your clit in soft circles, panting every time you felt Steve’s fingers slip between your own. Steve’s free hand was on your waist, a vice-like grip that you weren’t sure he was aware of, his palm on the strip of bare skin between your top and skirt. Every time you let out a shy noise, he squeezed, kneading at the dough there.
“Jesus Christ,” he muttered, jaw slack as he watched you work at yourself, never letting go of his hand and fuck, fuck, you were so wet, velvet heat under his touch.
“D’you use your fingers?” Steve asked you, lips against your cheek, both of you leaning into each other as if you were unable to help it. “Inside? Do you put your fingers inside yourself?”
Twenty minutes ago, you would’ve died if the boy had asked you such a thing, but now? Now? Now you whined at it, cunt clenching around nothing at the idea of it and you shook your head, temple rubbing against Steve’s cheek in a way that killed him with how fond it was.
“Not really,” you whispered to him, ‘cause even with his fingers slipping over your clit, you were still so shy. “Don’t feel big enough, never- shit - never full enough.”
Steve swore his eyes rolled back into his skull, ‘cause all he could see was white, a blank flash over his vision that felt white hot. He rubbed soothing at your waist, let his fingers span over the width of your side, blunt nails sliding over your ribs. “Poor girl,” he sympathised and he smiled when you whined as he pulled your fingers away. “Shh, gimme a minute, hey? Here, just, try this, huh?”
You didn’t get to ask what he was meaning before the fingers that had been rubbing over your slick skin were in his mouth, two digits pressed to his tongue and Steve sucked. He licked over the pads, most definitely tasting you and you felt his chest rumble with a groan he tried to keep in. And then, as quick as it happened, it was over.
Steve brought your spit slick fingers back between your thighs, nudging the tips of them against your entrance. You keened, hips arching off the bed a little until Steve soothed you back down against him, mouthing over your jaw and cheek in a touch that definitely couldn’t be misconstrued as a kiss.
You sighed as you slid them in, two fingers fucking into yourself as deep as you could manage, slipping in easily with how insanely turned on you were. You hooked them up, like all the articles in the magazines you hid from your parents told you to do, searching for that spot that would apparently make you see stars. But you fell short, fingers not long enough and your clit was aching with neglect.
“Steve,” you felt close to tears, the usual frustration bubbling at the surface of your chest, ready to pop and simmer over. You’d have normally given up by now. “Steve, s’not working.”
“Gotta be patient, babe,” Steve assured you, “gotta be nice to yourself, c’mon, don’t let your head take over.”
But Steve saw the tear that rolled down your cheek and he caught your chin, titling your face towards him as he frowned down at you. You looked wrecked, heartbroken and all pent up, lips red and slick from where you’d chewed at them, eyes all glassy.
He shouldn’t have asked. But he was already in too deep. What does it matter now, right?
Right?
“Want me to help?”
He waited, one second, two, three and then you nodded, relief and disbelief filling his chest all at once. He swallowed back a broken moan and tapped his thumb at your chin, just catching your pouting bottom lip. “You gotta tell me, please?”
“Please, Steve, please. I want you to touch me.”
He’d died. He was dead.
But then you were pulling at his wrist and guiding it back between your legs, your fingers slick from where they’d been inside of yourself and Steve wasn’t sure he was able to handle it. His middle finger nudged up against your entrance and Steve felt it flutter, his eyes closing as he took a deep breath and reminded himself that this was for you, not him.
He was rock fucking hard.
“Ready?” He asked in a last bid for confirmation. You were laying fully against him now, thighs pressed to his, skirt barely covering you and you nodded so furiously that Steve didn’t dare ask you to speak again. “Okay, I’ve got you, alright?”
His finger slid in so easily and you clenched around him, velvet heat that made his heart stutter and his cock kick up against your spine. You immediately felt the difference, the boy’s finger thicker and longer, already reaching parts of you that you’d never felt. You felt like you were going to burst.
“More?” Steve asked and his voice eas shot, eyes closing at the feel of you, your small hand wrapped around his wrist to ensure he wouldn’t stop and Steve wanted to tell you he’d never stop if you didn’t want him to, that he’d do this every fucking day if you’d let him. “Another?”
“Another,” you agreed and god, you weren’t holding back anymore, moans tumbling from your lips when Steve slid another finger in with his first, the feeling of your cunt tightening around him making you both cry out.
Your hips were shifting against him, listing yourself on and off of his fingers and he groaned, stuttered dirty, filthy words into your hair as he let you fuck yourself down onto his didgits. The friction was too much for him, his cock straining in the denim, weeping for release.
“Touch yourself, babe,” he managed to groan out, sighing at the sight of you doing what he told, hand flying to your thighs so you could rub messy, wet fingers over your clit. “That’s it, good girl. Jesus, are you close? I can feel you - fucking hell - I can feel you getting tighter.”
You mumbled something unintelligible, a sob ripping through your chest and Steve decided it wasn’t a good idea to ask, deciding that he needed to get you out of your own head so your body could take over.
“Do you like it when I talk to you?” He asked instead, a whisper against your ear, his breath warm on your neck, his fingers spanning upupup until they grazed the lace of your bra. You rutted against his hand harder, whining when he hit a deep spot inside of you, one that made your vision go blue-white. “You do, don’t you? My girl likes hearing dirty things, right? Like when I asked you if someone had went down on you? If you’d had someone’s tongue here?”
Steve slid his fingers in and out of you a little faster to get his point across, sweating when you moaned his name. His name. Your own fingers were moving with intent now; tight concise circles that were making your toes curl.
“Would you let me do that? Huh?” Steve dared to asked, grinning when you almost ripped the sleeve off his shirt as you grabbed at his arm, lips falling open in a long moan. “Shit, you look so damn pretty, you know that? I could do that for you though, if you wanted.” Steve’s eyes closed for just a second at the thought of it. “Could put my mouth on you, let you know if you’re really as sweet as you look—”
You seized up, body stiffening as you let out a noise Steve would never forget, a breathy moan of his name that he’d think about every time he fisted his own cock. He kept pumping his fingers into you, eyes wide as your own hand faltered and you shook, head slumping back against his shoulder as you decided to hold onto him instead, hands reaching back to grab at his shoulders, his neck, his hair.
Your pussy was a vice around his fingers, filthy, wet sounds filling his bedroom and he was pretty damn sure but he had to ask, he had to know—
“You comin’, babe? Yeah?” You nodded, frantic, eyes slammed shut and nose scrunched up all cute and Steve couldn’t help it, couldn’t stop it. “Fucking hell, oh shit, yeah, there you go, that’s it, that’s it, that’s it—”
He wasn’t even ashamed that he came in his jeans like a teenager, in fact, he was a little insane with it. White spots over his vision as his cock twitched and jumped, letting his hips grind against your ass as you whined, your cunt still fluttering around his fingers as he slowed down the way they pumped in and out of you. He heard you swear when he finally pulled them away, slick with your release, sliding them into his mouth as if hiding the evidence.
Your eyes finally met Steve’s when you turned and flopped onto the bed next to him, mattress shifting as you both panting, chests heaving. He turned to find you already staring, eyes wide and cheeks flushed the prettiest colour, almost matching his own.
“Holy fucking shit,” you managed on a gasp.
“Told you,” he managed to say, fighting to keep the smile of his lips.
“What?” You frowned at him, wondering what on earth he wanted to say to you after that. He still looked like your best friend, still sounded like him too. Maybe just a little more smug. “Told me what?”
Steve took the time to push his finger into his mouth once more, enjoying the way your face burned, lips falling open as you watched, unblinking. He let his tongue wrap around it, chasing what was left of your taste until he let it go with a dirty pop.
“Sweetest girl in this fucking town,” he said.
#steve harrington#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x y/n#steve harrington fic#steve harrington fluff#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington smut#steve harrington fanfic#Steve Harrington fanfiction#Steve Harrington oneshot
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baby
fuckboy!hyunjin. 1.6k word. cliched enemy to lovers(??) with a douchebag hyunjin.
“don’t tell me you’re scared of some fake gore,” the boy whispers over to you, followed by a mocking chuckle, “need me to protect you baby?”
“shut up.”
“baby.”
“shut-”
“can you both shut up and just watch the damn movie?” seungmin says from his sitting position on the floor, his head turning back to glare at both you and hyunjin on the couch, “i swear if i need to pause it again, i’m throwing both of you out in the cold!”
if it weren’t for the fact that your roommate was dating seungmin, you would never ever interact with someone like his best friend, hwang hyunjin, let alone let him into your apartment.
but unfortunately for you, the two were the ultimate besties which meant where one boy went, the other usually followed. that’s why it had become a norm for the four of you to hang out. like right now, a weekend movie night.
you really didn’t mind seungmin, the boy was nice and treated your roommate well but hwang hyunjin was a whole other story.
hwang hyunjin. sigh. the boy was the literal definition of a fuck boy. an obnoxious frat boy who flirted his way through every living thing in a skirt. yeah, that was a way to describe him.
at first, hanging out with him wasn’t all that bad. you actually didn’t mind him either, the boy was somewhat funny and that face of his was just absolutely breath taking. one of the many reasons why he was so popular around town.
but then he began treating you differently, for some reason. he’d go out of his way to annoy you, to insult you, to tease you. he seemed to suddenly hate you and he made sure to let you know that.
and it had been hell since.
“i’m gonna make more popcorn,” you get off the couch and head towards the kitchen, sighing at the thought of having to spend the rest of the night with hyunjin. classes had already been hell for you so the last thing you needed tonight was a screaming match with the fuck boy.
“don’t do too much thinking, your small brain might explode.”
that voice. that god awful voice.
you turn around to see the devil himself leaning against the kitchen entrance, arms crossed over and a smug grin on his stupid handsome face.
“what? cat got your tongue babe?” he makes his way over to you, cornering you in against the kitchen cabinet, “or have you finally fallen in love with me?”
“fuck off hwang,” you push at his chest but the boy doesn’t budge, only laughing at your weak move, “i’m not in the mood to deal with your shit.”
“what do you have against me anyway?” he leans in closer to you, both his hands now resting on either sides of you on the cabinet, “is it cause i’m so good looking and so popular?”
gulp.
this has to be the closest you’ve ever been to hyunjin, his face barely even an inch away from yours. the smell of his cologne is attacking you from every direction, a very clear indication that he was way into your personal space than necessary.
“no hwang. i hate you because you’re so obnoxious and so self centred!”
“oh really?”
“yes!” your hands push up against his chest again as you say so, preventing the boy from coming any closer to you, “you think everything is about you! just because all the girls on campus wants to fuck you, doesn’t mean you can be such a douchebag all the time!”
perhaps you were crazy but you swear you could see his gaze move from your eyes to your lips as you spoke, the boy clearly not paying any attention to your words. you’re not sure why he’s suddenly so quiet, why he’s not throwing insults at you but the way he’s staring is making you more nervous than ever.
you try to avoid his weird, intense gaze by moving away but the boy stays put, his arms on either sides of you seemingly sliding closer to your body instead.
“mo- move-”
“do you wanna fuck me?”
“what the fuck hyunjin?”
“you said every girl on campus wants to fuck me right? well do you wanna fuck me?”
“of course not!”
“well that’s really too bad,” he scoffs, a playful grin on his face as his hands grab onto your waist, holding you in place, “cause i wanna fuck you though.”
your mouth is frozen, your mind unable to process the words that had come out of his mouth. maybe you were just hearing things because there was no way he had just said what he said to you.
the boy who had made your life a living hell these past two months wanted to what? fuck you?
“you... what?”
“i said, i want to fuck you,” his grip on you tightens with every word, fingers now gripping so harshly into your skin that you’re certain marks will appear by tomorrow morning, “and if you don’t tell me to stop, i am going to kiss you right now.”
gulp.
“th- this isn’t funny. let go.”
you let out a squeal when he suddenly lifts you up onto the cabinet and moves to stand in between your dangling legs. his body is now comfortably pressed against yours, his arms tightly around your waist while yours are resting on his shoulders. it’s a position you wouldn’t have ever imagined you’d be in with him but here you are and you’re not pushing him away either.
“does it look like i’m trying to be funny?” his lips brushes past yours just slightly as he says so, a move you would’ve surely punched him for but at this moment, you don’t know how to react.
so many things are running through your mind, so many different potential reasons as to why he was suddenly acting this way.
“too late baby.”
and his lips were on yours before you could even respond, kissing you with so much force that your bottom lip immediately hurts. the boy is evidently desperate, wanting to taste more of you than just the surface.
his hands casually slides underneath your shirt as he continues to kiss you, causing an instant shiver through your body from his touch alone. you feel as though your body is on fire, every part of you screaming to be touched, to be pleased.
he moves away from you slightly after a bit, just enough for you to catch your breath again. he doesn’t take his eyes off of you the entire time, the intensity of his gaze only causing an embarrasing pool in between your legs. in addition to the pool that was already there during the kiss.
“if you just want to get your dick wet, well you’re not getting shit from me hwang.”
lies. you know for a fact that one more move from the boy and you’ll probably end up on your knees if he told you to.
but he didn’t need to know that.
“actually i’ve been trying for two months but you’re too fucking dense to notice,” he rolls his eyes at you, clearly annoyed, “why else would i spend every single weekend here? you think i really want to watch shitty b grade movies with the lovey dovey couple?”
“wait... what?”
“i flirt with you every single time! as if you really didn’t know!”
“being a dick is your way of flirting?” you make a disgusted face and slap his chest, “how on earth do you get girls everyday being this way?”
“well i haven’t had a girl in two months because the one i want is oblivious as fuck.”
silence.
...
more silence.
“well- well... i-”
“just shut up,” he smashes his lips onto your onces again, this time kissing you in a way that had your knees weak and your body feeling like mush. it’s a slow and sensual kiss, as if the boy is taking his time with you, wanting to feel every part of you.
you end up whimpering into the kiss when one of his hands moves to trace the thin lining of your pants, his fingers teasingly slipping past the band. but to your dismay, that’s all he does.
“hyunjin...”
“yeah baby, i’m right here.”
“oh. my. god,” you and hyunjin immediately freeze at your roommate’s sudden gasp, only to see her and seungmin standing at the entrance, completely disgusted, “i knew you guys would’ve ended up fucking one day but PLEASE not in my kitchen. PLEASE.”
“i told you dude. should’ve just confessed instead of giving me a headache for the past two months,” seungmin sighs dramatically before pulling your roommate away, “whatever, we’re going out. you guys play nicely.”
and the two are gone as quick as they appeared, leaving you and hyunjin alone in the apartment. no one says anything for a while but you don’t care. all you wanted to do was hide in a hole forever after being caught by your roommate and seungmin.
with a sigh, you decide it’d be best for you to get off the cabinet but hyunjin stops you.
“ah- i’m not done with you yet,” he says sternly, holding you in place, “we have a lot to talk about.”
“talk?”
“yeah like where you want me to take you on our first date.”
“who said i’d date you?” it’s your turn to scoff now, amazed at the boy’s confidence, “you wish hwang.”
“who you trying to fool? you were about to let me fuck you right here in this kitchen babe, so i’m pretty sure you wouldn’t say no to a date.”
“hwang hyunjin!”
“yeah baby, i’m right here.”
end.
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#bangchansnudes#stray kids#stray kids fanfic#stray kids fic#stray kids imagine#skz#skz fanfic#stray kids x reader#skz fic#stray kids smut#skz smut#skz x reader#skz drabble#skz fluff#stray kids fluff#stray kids drabble#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#skz hyunjin#stray kids hyunjin#hwang hyunjin#hwang hyunjin fanfic#hwang hyunjin fic#hwang hyunjin smut#hwang hyunjin drabble#hwang hyunjin scenario#hwang hyunjin x reader#hwang hyunjin stray kids#hyunjin smut#hyunjin drabble
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Katsuki fumbled as the heavy wooden door of your mansion was nearly slammed in his face, you being the cause. Your infuriated strides didn’t stop as you reached the kitchen.
Katsuki felt his eyes burn and bile rise in his throat as he tried desperately to reach you.
“Baby, please! It was one time, and I didn’t even kiss her-,” he rambles worriedly, taking a step aback as you turn around.
Your eyes held nothing but pure fire and pain.
“Oh my FUCKING GOD Katsuki! You didn’t kiss her?! Oh that’s just wonderful, I totally forgive you for going behind my FUCKING BACK and fucking other women! That makes everything okay now!” You cry? Laugh? You couldn’t tell anymore.
Katsuki winces at your tears, pearly streaks of his own staining his cheeks. He reaches for you, heart breaking when you flinch away from him.
“Baby-,” he starts.
“Don’t you fucking DARE call me that you disloyal bastard,” you sob.
“I gave you my EVERYTHING, you son of a bitch! The nights I spent slaving over that fucking stove so YOU wouldn’t go hungry! I broke my back cleaning this fucking house, I give up my social life so we can be together, I bust my fucking ass doing stuff in bed I don’t want to do, ALL FOR YOU! I gave you EVERYTHING! So don’t you fucking dare try and have some balls now.” You sob through gritted teeth.
Katsuki sinks to his knees, openly sobbing and grabbing your hands. You tried forcing them back, but his grip was relentless. He pressed tearful kisses to your hands, amplifying your pained sobs.
“(Y/N), please! It was the worst mistake of my entire fucking life, of OUR lives. It was an act of stupidity, and if I could go back in time I would kill past me for even looking at her. It’s YOU I love, not her. It’s you, it’s always been you,” he gasped for breath, looking up at you. You paused.
“AAAAAAAND CUT! That was a great take everyone, go grab some lunch and be back in an hour to continue the shoot,” the director shouts, hopping off his pedestal.
You wiped your tears off, cursing the added tear stick as you laughed.
“Jesus Christ, that was a rough scene. How are you, baby?” You look down at him. Your smile was warm, a complete contrast to the character in the series you were acting in. Katsuki made no move to wipe his tears.
He rose slowly, before wrapping his arms around you tightly. He sniffled as he held you as close as possible, kissing the side of your face.
“Baby, are you alright? It was just a scene!” You giggle, kissing him on the forehead.
“If I ever make you sad like that, I need you to kill me. I would rather die than make you cry the way you just did,” he sniffed, wiping his nose and holding your cheeks.
“Aw sweetie. I know you’d never cheat on me. I love you so, so, so much. I guess we just did too good a job acting,” you giggle. You pull him in closer for a kiss, wiping his tears and playing with his baby hairs.
“I love you so much. Never ever forget that,” he says firmly. You nod, before squeezing out of his grip and tapping his ass playfully.
“Of course angel, now let’s get lunch. Sato made enchiladas and I’m craving them so badly,” you kiss him again. Katsuki’s phone beeped, and he checked before grimacing slightly.
“I’ll be right there babe, Eijiro’s complaining about something,” he says, squeezing your sides and sending you off.
You’re so fucking right, baby. He thought. His chest bloomed in pain. Ochaco’s bunched up tits stared right back at him in picture form, taunting him.
I did too good of an acting job.
#bnha x reader#bakugou x reader#bakugou#katsuki bakugou x reader#bakugou x reader angst#bakugou angst Drabble#MHA x reader angst#bnha x reader angst#actor au#bakugou angst#katsuki bakugou x reader angst
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helloo!! if you don't mind(and if you have time), can you please make a matt smut inspired by the song She's so Nice by Pink Guy ??
It can be a chris smut too if you want !!
this man quite literally made me go BARK BARK BARK
SHE'S SO NICE
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: dom!matt x reader
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: EDIT: i forgot to put one so i’m just gonna say doing the deed with matt sturniolo
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: SMUTTY SMUT SMUT, big tits reader, cheating (don’t do that!), marking, titty fucking, mouth fucking, hair gripping, p in v, degradation, choking, stomach bulge, ROUGHHH
ASSUME YOU'RE ON THE PILL!
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 705
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: request for @skadltmf and anon! these two felt right to combine :)
i hope i did okay??? ngl this one was hard to do LOL
as somebody with big tatas this made me giggle and kick my feet a lot🤭 (my back hurts all the time)
hickeys ran from your neck down to the top of your breasts, the things matt worships the most about you.
you think having double d’s are the worst, but he is by far mesmerized by them.
you squirm and whine underneath his grip as he sucks one last mark into your skin. he lifts his head to admire your naked body, roaming his hands along your curves. he approaches your breasts and starts to squeeze them.
you whine again. “matt.”
“what?” he asks, finally releasing his hard dick from his underwear. you feel his knees on the bed as he hovers over you. “what do you want?”
you lift yourself onto your elbows and look at him through hooded eyes. “i—” you pause when matt starts to stroke himself while throwing his head back with a moan.
you don’t have time to blink when he aligns himself to your tits and starts thrusting into them. his hands push them together to make them squeeze around him.
your mouth hangs open as you watch himself use your chest to get off. “i fucking love these tits, man.” he groans.
the arousal between your legs starts to drip onto the sheets below you because of how pathetically wet you are. he grunts as he goes faster, but pulls away before he can release.
he grips your hair which makes you whimper. he lifts your head slightly so you can look into his eyes. his tip grazes against your lips. “open your mouth.”
you don’t have a chance to open all the way when he’s already pushing himself slowly inside. matt lets out a sigh of relief when he feels the warmth consuming his dick.
the grip on your hair stays when he starts to rut his hips forward. your eyes start to water when he reaches the back of your throat, the gulping and gagging sounds cause him to let out a breathy laugh. “look at you; choking on another man’s cock. such a fucking slut.”
you moan around him, his fist on your hair tightening. he starts to bob your head to match his rhythm, drool dribbling down your chin.
“shit.” he breathes, taking himself out of your mouth and smearing his cum all over your tits.
“matt.” you repeat in the same whiny tone as before. “he’s going to be here soon.”
“good.” he grips your throat, pushing his still-hard erection into your dripping hole. “he can walk in and see how much of a whore his girlfriend is, yeah?”
he starts pounding into you immediately, causing you to cry out. your mascara starts to run down your face.
it feels like you don’t have time to breathe by how each thrust knocks the air out of your lungs. “p-please, go harder.”
he releases his hand from your neck and grabs the back of your knees, pushing them further apart so he can go deeper. “your boyfriend has no idea what he’s missing out on. fuck, you’re so tight.”
you’re clenching so hard around his cock that he can’t even pull out all the way. instead, it makes him push further into your pussy.
your eyes cross, the bulge in your abdomen showing as clear as day. “feel how deep i am inside your tummy? you were made to be fucked by me. such a good slut for me.”
“cum—” you blab, your tongue starting to stick out. “gonna cum for you.”
matt’s eyes are fixated on the way your tits bounce aggressively at how hard he’s railing into you. he grabs your throat again. “look at me.”
your eyes flutter to his, and he grins. “there you go.” he says as you feel him paint your walls white.
you twitch, seeing stars as your face scrunches with pleasure when your orgasm hits you like a train. “cumming… cumming…”
“i know baby, i know,” he says, now doing tiny thrusts to make sure you take it all.
he slowly pulls out of you, wincing at the sudden emptiness. he sits up, looking at your painted white tits and pussy that’s leaking both his and your release. he smiles proudly.
“i should leave you like this so your boyfriend knows what a real orgasm looks like.”
𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!
@bunbunbl0gs @lexisecretaccx @thy-mission @angelic-sturniolos111 @sophssturn @mattsneezing @janiellasblog @blahbel668 @meg-sturniolo @hearts4chris @mattslolita @sturnbaby @imwetforyourmom @tillies33ssss
#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo imagine#sturniolo smut#sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo fanfic#✎ ⤾ haleigh’s requests!
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Ditz ,
authors note : miss me?
Warning !! : reader is female, reader is feminine, swearing, talks of sex, vulgar language used, hint of flirting between reader and dina, TINY mention of reader flirting with a teacher, possessive Ellie, oral fixation, face slapping (once), thigh riding, pantie stealing, eating out, fingering, nickname usage: sugar, pretty, babygirl (in a mocking manner), doll, sweet girl, angel, baby, sweetheart, ect.
You were sat in class, positioned in the front corner along with your best friend, Dina. It was only 9 in the morning and you were already complaining to her about the poor taste you had in men and now women when it came to sleeping around.
“And I thought that a woman would be different! Like men are sooooo fucking stupid, none of them even know where the clit is Dina! Like, are you kidding me? How do you miss it?! One motherfucker starting rubbing my left lip thinking he was an expert!! He was all up in my ear like-“
You leant across the table to whisper in her ear, trying to suppress your giggles and ignoring the fact that your skirt rode a little too high due to its ridiculously short length. You whispered in her ear in a poorly attempted gruff voice and said,
“- That feel good babygirl?”
Dina burst out laughing, slamming her hands against the table in disbelieve,
“Shut the fuck up, oh my god!”
You sat back down and giggled with her before rolling your eyes and crossing your arms over your chest, which led to your breasts almost falling out of your low cut top.
“And all i’m gonna say is, whoever said ‘big feet equals a big dick’ is a fucking liar!”
Dina let out a loud cackle, causing some of the other students to jump. You giggled once more, before slipping down further into your seat with a frown.
“But I really thought a woman would be different D!! I’m so disappointed”
You pouted and reached over the table to play with the loose strands of her hair that fell out her bun. Dina hummed and spoke,
“Awh sugar, I’m sure you’ll find someone who’s perfect at fucking you”
You both laugh and she lands a kiss on the wrist that hovered over her face, which caused you to give her a soft smile.
Just after, the teacher and the rest of the class came through into the classroom and made their way to their seats. Dina and you both pulled away from each other and pulled out your textbooks.
You sent a wink to the teacher as soon as she made eye contact with you, which caused her to pause momentarily. This made Dina and you to both giggle. Dina then lent over to you and whispered in your ear,
“She sooooo wants to get in your panties”
You snort and roll your eyes, gently shoving her away from you.
The lesson went by too slow for your liking, nothing that was being taught peaked your interest. This was also evident in your grades. You were failing miserably, yet you didn’t care, you didn’t even try to pass.
You turned your focus from the board to look behind you, taking in everyone’s faces and humming a tune quietly to yourself. Then you met eyes with her.
Ellie fucking Williams, the most gorgeous woman you have ever seen in your life. You would more than happily give up your whole life just to sleep with her.
Yet, it seemed as if she couldn’t care less about you. You would often give her a sweet smile if you saw each other in the halls, or you would be polite and say hi to her if you bumped into each other in public, and that was fairly often due to you both staying in campus in the small town it was located in. Yet she would never give something nice back in return. She would always scoff at you, roll her eyes or look at you like you just smeared shit all over her. Saying it upset you was an understatement, your face would always drop, and in most cases, your eyes would even well with tears. You couldn’t understand why she was so mean.
You gave her a soft smile when you both met eyes, yet all she did was turn her attention back to the teacher. This caused a pout to form on your lips and your posture slumped.
Dina noticed and patted your thigh,
“Don’t waste your time on her pretty, it’s not worth it”
You sigh and rest your head on her shoulder, watching as she drew soft circles on your thigh with her finger,
“She’s just so perfect D, ‘s not fair”
She hums and sighs, kissing the top of your head. Moments after, the bell had rung and students immediately jumped up from their seats and began to pack up, this included Dina and you.
As you placed your book into your bag, the teacher made her way over to your desk and stood in front of you. You looked up at her and she looked down at you with a stern expression.
“Your grades are a disgrace Y/N. Starting tonight Ellie Williams will be tutoring you, you’re lucky she volunteered to help or I’m afraid i would’ve had to kick out the class.”
“Ellie asked to help me?”
She frowned slightly at the response she was given, yet nodded her head.
“I asked my top students if they were able to free some time and tutor you. Ellie asked if she could do it as she has plenty of free time. To be quite frank, she shot up at the chance, the others didn’t get a chance to respond.”
You nodded your head and quickly turned to glance at Dina with a wide smile. Dina only giggled and rolled her eyes. You couldn’t believe it.
Yet, the more you thought about it, the more you were confused. If Ellie hated you that much why did she jump to the opportunity of helping you? Was it to humiliate you?
You groaned and shoved your face further into your pillow.
It was an hour before Ellie was coming over to your dorm for your tutoring. You were so excited, yet so scared at the same time. You didn’t know what was going to happen and it worried you, the person who constantly stuck their nose up at you was coming over to your dorm to help you? It made no sense.
You whined and kicked your feet, in the act also kicking stuffies off of the end of your bed. You weren’t ready.
Literally, you weren’t ready.
There was a variety of things scattered across your room from the previous few days, creating a mess. You were still wearing your clothes from earlier, you hadn’t touched up your makeup, and you hadn’t even been bothered to find your school supplies that are well needed in order for you to be taught anything.
You slowly pulled yourself up with a groan and looked around your room, which made you groan even louder at the true state it was in. It didn’t look as messy as this earlier, so why does it look such a mess now?
You stood up and made your way over to your closet, tiptoeing over everything in your way. You began to strip down to your underwear and as you shimmied out of your mini skirt, the door knocked.
A loud gasp fell from your lips youand looked around frantically. Why is she here early ?!
In a panicked trance, you swung open the door and stood in front of Ellie in only your underwear.
She let out a choked scoff, before shoving you back further into your room and made her way in. She quickly shut the door and spun herself around.
“You must be fucking crazy. Do you answer the door to everyone like that?”
You shook your head quick, before realising she couldn’t even see you,
“No!! I just panicked! I was trying to get changed before you-”
She groans and cuts you off,
“Just get dressed, I don’t need to hear a whole story about it”
You huff and pout at her attitude. It made you think that she truly did ask to help you just to humiliate you.
You threw on an oversized hoodie that you had picked up from the floor and whilst you did so, Ellie took the time to look around your dorm room, taking in the complete mess and the immense amount of pink, which caused her to scoff.
You turned to look at her once you were decent, and watched as she mentally picked apart your room. It made you feel small, although she didn’t say anything, the look on her face was more than enough. She sighed and then turned to you,
“Do you even have what you need? Your guide? note book?”
You slowly shook your head and rushed forward to your desk, reaching into your draws to pull out various books.
Ellie stood behind you, staring straight ahead at the clear view she had of your ass and more. She couldn’t take her eyes off, she was mesmerised. She knew she shouldn’t stare, but maybe it was the way that your pastel blue thong perfectly outlined your cunt, or maybe it was the perfect amount of fat on your ass. As you stood up straight, she quickly turned to look at something else, her eyes landing on panties that were left discarded on the floor, which caused her to tug her bottom lip under her teeth.
You threw your books onto your bed and sat down, looking up at Ellie. You spoke in a small voice,
“You can sit”
She nods and sits on your bed facing you, she sits on top of your stuffies and you had to hold back the urge not to yank her off of them. She saw your face twist the moment she sat and she frowned,
“What?”
“Nothing nothing. It’s just that… you’re sat on my stuffies”
She rolled her eyes and pulled her glasses out from her pocket. She put them on and adjusted them so they rested comfortably on her nose. After, she opened the books that sat infront of her, scanning your notes that were kept to an extreme minimal, she could tell you didn’t care just through how scruffy some of your notes were.
You played with your sleeves and watched her as she flicked through the book with a disapproving scowl.
“Your notes are shit Y/N, how do you even understand them?”
She glanced up at you over her glasses and you began to gnaw at your bottom lip.
“Um… I don’t?”
She looked back down to your book in silence and began to make edits to your notes. You watched as she wrote in your book and drew arrows to certain words, in hopes to make it more understandable for you.
“Ellie I can’t even see”
“Shut up”
You grumbled and sent her a glare that she didn’t even acknowledge. You crossed your arms over your chest and continued to watch her make notes.
You kept silent for a few moments, before deciding to speak once more,
“Aren’t you meant to be teaching me? Yknow, with words?”
“Y/N, can you shut up?”
You rolled your eyes and layed back against your headboard, not even bothering to tug your hoodie down to cover yourself.
“Sit up”
She spoke to you without even looking up from the book, she continued to write and in all honesty, it pissed you off.
Why is she sitting there and acting like she has been forced into tutoring you? It seriously made no sense to you.
“Why should I if I can’t even see? And if you won’t even teach me anything?”
That’s what caused her to look up. Her eyes were met with your cunt, before she quickly averted her gaze up to your face. She glared at you before grabbing your legs and pulling you towards her. Your hoodie road up past your waist, and she acted like she couldn’t care less. In reality, her heart was pounding. She then lifted you up by your waist and effortlessly positioned you on her lap.
“Better now?”
You nodded your head and went silent, your face was beet red and you were trying to get grasps of what just happened. Ellie acted like it was nothing and she continued making notes in your book. In order for her to see, she placed the book in your lap, her arms around your waist and she rested her chin against your shoulder.
You read through the notes she had made and somehow, you understood it all. Your eyes shifted from the notes to her hands. she had rough hands, and it was clear she often bit her nails due to how scuffed they were.
Her slender fingers were decorated in chunky rings that wrapped just perfectly around her digits. You traced over every vein with your eyes and your mouth fell agape at just how mesmerising they truly were.
“Y/N, are you listening?”
You quickly snapped out of your trance and nodded your head.
“Alright then, what did I just say?”
“Uhm… C equals two?”
She groans loud, directly into your ear, before lifting her hand from the notebook to flick your forehead.
“No.”
“Ow, Ellie!”
You whine and massage the area she had flicked.
“Y equals two. You divide Y by X, which gives you zero point zero two, and then you would divide that by C, which would give you the answer of two. Meaning, your answer would be 100, as C would equal 100. Understand?”
You let out a fake cry, dropping your head into your hands.
“I give up. I hate this and it is way too difficult!”
“Y/N, this is basic maths. It’s not hard to understand. If you hate it, what was the point in choosing it as a course?”
“Because Dina wanted to do math! And I just followed her because I didn’t want to do a course with strangers in!”
“Have you ever heard of making friends? Or does your small ass brain not understand what that is either.”
You span around on her lap, kicking her in her ribs in the process, to scowl at her.
“I do understand what that is, thank you very much smart ass. Every time I try to make friends with someone new, they just think I want to get into their pants!”
“Well i’m not surprised, have you even acknowledged how you talk to everyone? Let’s use me as an example. You bat your eyelashes at me with each word that comes out of your mouth, you will stare at me with eyes wide as fuck, you’re constantly trying to touch me, not to mention you following me around like a lost lamb all because you want to say hi. You bite your lip whenever I mutter a word, and you prantz around the whole college wearing skimpy little outfits. Of course everyone thinks that you want to fuck them.”
Your face scrunched up more and more with each word she said,
“That is not true.”
“Yes it is Y/N. You even do it to the teacher, the whole class could say the exact same, it’s so fucking evident.”
“Are you done obliterating me? Or do you want to continue?”
she scoffs directly into your face and crosses her arms over her chest,
“Obliterating you? You really are stupid. I am not doing such thing, I am just stating the obvious doll”
Heat rose to your cheeks, either from embarrassment, or from what she had just called you, maybe it was from both.
Ellie ran a hand through her hair, a puff of air falling from her lips. Her eyes scanned your figure up and down before she spoke once more,
“You really get on my nerves, you know that?”
“If i am reallyyyyy on your nerves, then why did you volunteer to help me? Matter of fact, why did you jump to the opportunity, not even giving anyone else the chance to volunteer, huh?”
“Watch your fucking tone when you’re talking to me.”
“Don’t tell me what to do. Answer the question, Ellie.”
She grabbed your face, smushing your cheeks in between her fingers and thumb, as she pulled you closer. Her face was inches away from yours, she could feel her hot breath fanning against your face.
“I said, watch your fucking tone when talking to me.”
Your whole body felt like it was on fire. Your face was beyond red and you could feel beads of sweat beginning to build on the back of your neck.
Ellie was pissed off, and it was clearly obvious. You didn’t dare speak up, let alone move. You didn’t want to piss her off even more, if anything, you wished she would leave so you could hide away in your room and never step foot outside these four walls ever again, to slowly wallow away in your own embarrassment.
The both of you were frozen in the same position for what felt like hours, with one of her hands squeezing your face together, and the other that had wrapped around your waist without you realising. She was staring directly into your eyes, and you stared right back into hers.
After some time, she had let go of your face, and leant back against your headboard. Both of her hands were now holding your waist, her eyes still glued to yours. She licked her lips and hummed, eyeing you up and down once again, before she spoke,
“You want me to tell you why I volunteered to tutor you?”
You nodded your head, not finding the courage to speak up.
“You drive me fucking crazy Y/N, like beyond fucking crazy. The way you talk to everyone makes me feel insane, because you should only be talking to me like that. You shouldn’t be batting your eyelashes at anyone but me, you shouldn’t be chasing anyone else around but me.”
You frowned at what had just came out her mouth. You thought that she hated you, You thought that she couldn’t stand being anywhere near you.
She continued to speak, despite the clear confusion displayed on your face.
“I want you all to myself. I don’t want you near any man, or any other woman, especially if they don’t know you to treat and please you. Even seeing you flirt with Dina during class is too much. Only I can please you Y/N, everyone else is fucked for not knowing how to treat such a perfect girl like you.”
“Ellie… I don’t understand. You seem so disgusted every time i’m near you. Please don’t be playing a prank on me, it’s not funny.”
She sighs and strokes your hair, curling it around her index and middle finger. You had to fight everything back not to lean into her hand.
“I’m not pranking you sweet girl, I may be mean but I am not that mean.”
You went to speak but before any sound could pass your lips, she cut you off.
“Before you had slept with Riley, I thought you were only interested in men. So, I tried to stay as far from you as I could to stop myself from becoming more and more infatuated with you. I was, and still am, totally fucking obsessed with you. I would ignore you and brush you off because each time you would latch onto my arm, or try to talk to me, I would become so frustrated with the thought that only a man could have the absolute pleasure of dating you, Y/N. I wasn’t mad at you, I was mad at the missed opportunity. Although, as soon as Riley had told me she had slept with you, I knew that I had a chance. It felt like fate when on the same day, our teacher had asked if anyone could tutor you, so of course I had jump to the opportunity baby”
You nodded your head slowly, trying to get a grasp of everything she had just told you, before scrunching up your face once more.
She groans at your reaction,
“You’re such a fucking ditz.”
“Ellie shut up”
She chuckles and pulls you forward, so your body is flush against her chest. She looks down at you, and traces her thumb across your bottom lip.
Without thinking, you had wrapped your lips around the tip of her thumb and slowly swiped your tongue across it. Ellie groaned at the sight and had bucked her hips up, the cold, metal button on her jeans bumping into your clothed clit.
You let out a whine at the sensation, which had caused Ellie to smirk.
She pushed her thumb further into your mouth, until your lips were wrapped around the base. She admired you for some time, watching your face intently, before she pulled her phone from her back pocket and snapped a picture you.
You looked at her with eyes wide, in disbelief. All she did was laugh at your reaction. She then shifted and positioned you on her thigh, still keeping her thumb in your mouth.
“Cmon princess, ride it”
“W-what?”
“You heard me loud and clear. I know you can do it baby”
You nodded your head, looking down at her thigh, unable to maintain eye contact. However, Ellie didn’t like that, as soon as you averted your gaze, she pulled her thumb from your mouth and placed a firm slap on your cheek, which pulled a loud yelp from your lips.
“Eyes on me Y/N. Where’s all that confidence gone, hm?”
She spoke as she caressed your cheek, eyeing the red splotchy mark that began to form.
Ellie hummed as you looked back into her eyes. You slowly began to rock your hips back and forth against her thigh, biting down on your bottom lip.
“That’s my good girl”
You blushed at her words, and continued to grind your hips into her. Ellie’s hands had found their way back to your hips, and she pushed you down further into the strong muscle in between your thighs. The feeling of her rough jeans against your sensitive clit felt like bliss.
Quickly, with the added force from Ellie, moans and breathy whines fell from your lips.
Ellie felt like she was in heaven. Listening to the sounds that came from you, and watching you pathetically grind against her felt unreal. She kept thinking about how bizarre it was that she was now in this position, but god, she was not going to complain, not even once.
“Ellieeeee, ‘s not enoughhh”
She frowns, and holds you still with a firm grasp on your hips,
“Not enough?”
You lent forward, until your face was milimetres away from hers, and you shook your head. You spoke to her, sounding breathless,
“Need more…”
You glanced down at her lips, before looking back into her eyes. Ellie chuckled and licked her lips,
“What a greedy girl”
You hummed and pressed your lips against hers. A small kiss very quickly turned into a heavy make-out session. You wrapped your hands behind her neck, and pulled her closer to you, smashing your lips into hers. Your eyes were squeezed shut, and you shoved your tongue into her mouth.
Ellie’s fingers dug into your hips, so much so that when she moved her hands behind to your ass, there were nail marks shaped as crescent moons left littered in your hips. She started to grind you into her thigh once more, whilst keeping up with the sloppy make-out.
Ellie groaned into the kiss as she felt it growing more and more sloppy. There was drool forming in the corners of your mouth, that slowly started to drip down your chin, and you began to pant into the kiss.
Ellie’s hand slivered from your ass, to your clothed cunt. She started to rub slow circles against your clit through your panties, which caused you to whimper and bite down on her bottom lip, making Ellie hiss.
You pulled away from the kiss, and you looked like a wreck. There was drool all down your chin, your lips were swollen, and there was tears brimming your eyes. Your eyebrows were scrunched together, and your eyes were half lidded.
“Please go faster els, pretty pleaseee”
She stopped rubbing circles against your clit and cocked her head to the side,
“What if I don’t want to, hm? Then what princess?”
You let out a cry and looked at her with the best pleading look you could give,
“I said please though Ellie”
She laughs directly into your face, which caused you to huff. You slapped her chest and turned your head away,
“You’re mean.”
“I agree doll”
“Good, you should”
In an instant, Ellie had shoved you down onto the bed, and she was now hovering over you,
“Yeah? I should?”
You looked up her and nodded your head. She smirked at you, and brushed away the stray hairs that were sticking to your forehead.
“You’re so beautiful”
You smiled at the compliment, whilst pulling her pelvis into yours with your thighs. You tangled your fingers in her hair and tugged her closer, so your face was once again millimetres away from hers.
“You’re so perfect els”
She pecks your lips and hums,
“Yeah baby? You think so?”
“I know so”
Ellie chuckles, before prying your thighs off her hips. She shuffles her way down the bed, and stops just as her face aligns with your clothed cunt.
The feeling of her hot breath hitting your clit made you shudder and close your thighs around her head. She laughs and pushes your hoodie upto your waist,
“Oh sweetheart, i’ve not even started yet and you’re already acting like this?”
You fake a cry and grab a fistful of the bedsheets,
“Please Ellie”
Ellie places a kiss onto your clothed clit, before she pulls down your panties. unbeknownst to you, she had shoved the pair of panties into her back pocket. Ellie then placed another kiss onto your clit, which ripped a whine from your throat.
Ellie wasted no time, her head drove straight into your cunt and she started to lap up your clit, sucking and licking it like it was her last meal. Your head fell back, and a string of curses fell from your mouth.
“Fuck, Ellie!”
She hums and trails her tongue down further, before she began to bully her tongue into your cunt. She was sloppy with it, her movements were fast yet uneven. Not that she cared, she knew you were enjoying it, It was quite obvious.
Your legs were already twitching, you kept lifting your hips into her face, there was not a second where you were quiet, either you were moaning, or you were cursing.
Ellie’s chin was dripping with a mix of your juices, and her saliva. She felt as if she could eat you out for the rest of her life, and she would never get bored, not even for a second.
Your thighs tightened around her head, and you kept clenching around Ellie’s tongue.
Ellie couldn’t believe you were going to cum this early, she’s only just started. Just as your moans grew louder, Ellie pulled away.
“W-what the fuck Ellie!”
You lifted your head to look at her, with a frown painted across your face. She looked at you with a smile, before she licked her lips.
“You taste so good baby”
You huff and throw your head back onto the bed. Did she think you already came? Was that it?
Ellie could tell you were deep in thought, And by the pout on your lips, and your glassy eyes, she could tell it wasn’t good.
“Oh, you think i’m done?”
She cocks one of her eyebrows up, and stares at you, waiting for a response.
“Well it looks like it.”
She rolls her eyes and slaps your cunt, making you yelp and arch your back.
“Ow!!”
“Don’t think so low of me again.”
Ellie’s tongue dove straight back into your cunt, whilst she toyed with your clit using her thumb.
In an instant, moans and chants of Ellie’s name fell from your mouth once again.
You needed Ellie closer, if that was even possible. So, you placed your legs over her shoulders, and pulled her closer by a fistful of her hair.
Ellie let out a loud groan at the stinging sensation running through her scalp, that had vibrated against your cunt. You were a lot stronger than she had thought.
Ellie latched her lips around your clit once more, and without a warning she shoved two fingers into your cunt. She nipped at your clit with her teeth, and with a fast pace she plunged her fingers in and out of your hole.
You were even messier than before. Tears were streaming down your face, your mascara clumping underneath your eyes. Drool was spilling from the corner of your mouth, once again. Your forehead was dripping with sweat. Your back was arched, and your knuckles were turning white from how tight you were pulling on Ellie’s hair.
You had never felt this good. Never with anyone before, You couldn’t even make yourself feel this good. You were that blissed out you thought you were about to pass out.
“E-Ellie I need to cum!”
Instead of answering, Ellie continued to bully your cunt and clit with her fingers and tongue.
You could hear her slurping up the juices that kept spilling from your cunt, and the sound of her fingers pulling in and out.
Then, with a curl of her fingers that brushed against that one spongey spot, you had came all over Ellie’s face with a squeal.
Ellie’s pace began to slow once you rode out your high. She had then pulled away from your cunt, and looked up at your wrecked state.
You were panting heavily, your eyes were shut and your legs continued to twitch.
Ellie pulled her phone from her pocket, and snapped another picture of you. Before she leant down and kissed your forehead.
“Good girl baby, you did so well. Let’s get you cleaned up, yeah?”
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i know who you are | 6. the fight
Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader
Chapter Summary: Word of Joel's indiscretion spreads quickly through town, leading to a vicious fight. When Joel begins to worry you may never forgive him, he sets into motion a plan to win you back.
Chapter Warnings: language, angst, pining, sad!Joel, amnesia, slow burn, previous infidelity mentioned, violence (fist fight), blood, bruises, jealousy/possessiveness
WC: 8K
Series Masterlist
The thought of leaving your bed was excruciating.
For nearly three days, you could hardly do much more than use the bathroom and drink some water. When you heard Joel leave for patrol, his footsteps always pausing hesitantly on the other side of your door before begrudgingly going down the steps, you would eventually drag yourself downstairs and force yourself to eat something. Anything. It didn't really matter. You didn't crave anything. Didn't look forward to a single thing except the sweet embrace of sleep. But by the fourth day, you knew you would have to go back to work or else Nick would make a house call to check on you.
You had lied and said you hurt your back so you could get out of working for a few days, but enough time had passed, enough tears were shed, enough pity was wasted when you finally forced yourself to get up one morning and take a shower.
It helped more than you thought it would. The steam billowing around you in the confined space, the warm water pummeling your shoulders, working out the kinks in your muscles from too many hours hunched over in agony. If you had any self-awareness, you might have asked yourself why you had such a powerful reaction to Joel kissing someone else. If you had a clear enough mind, you might have remembered you didn't even react this badly when you woke from your accident only to discover your whole family was dead and the world went to hell.
No, you only seemed to fall into a deep depression over Joel finding comfort from another woman.
And not just any woman. Angie.
It still made your blood boil as you slipped on clean clothes for work. You should have known she was a shark, smelling blood in the water that very first night when she cornered you in the bathroom.
And to make matters worse, he had the audacity to accuse you of not caring. Not giving a shit about him, to be exact.
That fucking asshole.
When you came down the stairs and spotted the coffee maker still on with your favorite mug next to the carafe, you scoffed and kept walking to grab your coat. As much as you wanted some coffee, you were too stubborn to accept Joel's shitty gesture.
The winter sun was blinding against the snow. Or maybe your eyes were just too swollen and dry, too accustomed to staying in the darkness of your bedroom for days on end, but whatever it was caused you to wince and rub your face.
"Hey! You're alive!" you heard Ellie's voice call out from the driveway. She was walking up the path at the exact same time as you with her backpack slung over one shoulder and her winter jacket unzipped.
"Yeah, barely," you replied, wishing you had some of the coffee Joel had left behind. You took the porch steps carefully and met her out on the sidewalk, your pupils finally adjusting to the brightness. "How's it going, kid?"
She opened her mouth to reply but paused, giving you a funny look.
"What's wrong?" you asked, unable to read her expression.
"Nothing, just that nickname... took me by surprise," she laughed with a shake of her head, "you used to call me that before. Haven't heard it in a long time, I guess." You shielded your eyes and shrugged.
"Common nickname, I suppose," you reasoned, and she nodded in agreement.
"How's the back?" she asked with a point, and you almost had to ask her what she was talking about before you remembered your lie.
"Oh! Much better, thanks. Must've pulled a muscle or something, who knows."
"Well, that's good. Listen, I gotta get to school, but do you wanna get dinner later with me and Dina? Seth's making mac and cheese, and it's like, the fucking best, dude," she said excitedly, and you didn't have the heart to say no.
"Yeah, sounds great," you smiled, then gave her a quick wave before heading in the opposite direction towards the infirmary.
It was only a short ten minute walk to work, but the fresh air combined with stretching your muscles for the first time in days really did something to improve your mood. By the time you pushed open the door to the infirmary, you were actually looking forward to working again.
And so was Nick, apparently, because his eyes lit up and his body sagged with relief when he saw you.
"I was a few hours away from sneaking you the good pills and begging you to come back," he joked, then his face turned serious. "Everything alright? What happened?"
"Oh, I'm fine," you said, waving off his concern, "I slipped on some ice and pulled a muscle, it's all good now."
"Well, be careful out there, alright? You're the best aide I have."
"I'm the only aide you have," you corrected him before hanging up your jacket. "What do you need me to do?"
The morning went by fast. Nick had told you in the few days you were out, the clinic wasn't terribly busy, but he unfortunately did fall behind on housekeeping. So you busied yourself running loads of sheets and blankets to the laundry, then sanitizing equipment until Mr. Phillips came in after lunch with a laceration on his arm from working in the stables. It wasn't a bad injury, but it required some cleaning and a few stitches, which you were secretly eager to observe. You wanted to get more exposure to stitching in the hopes of being able to take care of non-emergency injuries by yourself one day.
It felt good to feel useful again. Staying busy forced your mind off Joel and the whole mess waiting for you at home, and you were grateful for the distraction. So much so that you decided to stay a little longer than usual and fold the linens that came back from the laundry. You were killing two birds with one stone: staying busy and avoiding going home in between work and dinner. By now, you knew he'd be back and likely waiting for you, and you still had no idea what you would say.
As the sun began to set and the world outside the infirmary grew darker, you slid your coat back on and locked the door behind you before heading for the dining hall.
Shoving your hands deep into your pockets, you tucked your chin against your chest, feet carrying you swiftly through the streets, eyes cast down and avoiding others as best you could. When you arrived at the dining hall, it was packed, per usual, but you did manage to spot Ellie and Dina holding a small table in the back of the room. As you weaved your way through the crowd, you noticed they were sharing some bread and butter and you felt your stomach rumble. For the first time in days, you felt excited to eat.
"Hey," you said in greeting as you dropped your coat over the back of an empty chair before giving them each a half hug. "Freezing out there."
"Give it a second. It's hotter than hell in here," Dina joked before pushing the basket of bread in your direction. You plopped down into your chair and moaned when you felt the bread was still warm, then tore off little pieces and popped them into your mouth.
"Hungry?" Ellie asked, only partially joking as you nodded vigorously.
"Did you order the mac and cheese yet?"
"Yeah, didn't want him to run out," she replied as she eased back into her chair and turned her head toward Dina. "Do you see Chris and Holly over there? What are they thinking? They know that shit'll get back to Claire. What a bunch of assholes."
"Who?" you asked, your voice muffled around the bread.
"Couple of kids in our class," Dina explained, nodding towards the other side of the hall. You twisted around, your eyes scanning the crowd until you saw a younger couple sitting together, the girl sitting on the guy's lap and toying with his hair. "That's Chris, and he's been dating this girl, Claire, for like, what? Six months or so? And look at him. Letting that hussy crawl all over him. Men are pigs."
You choked on your laughter and took a swig of water. If only they knew.
Ellie's eyes lit up as she looked at something behind you, and you turned around to follow her gaze, spotting Seth as he made his way through the crowd with three plates of mac and cheese. However, just over his left shoulder you happened to notice Joel for the first time since you arrived, but by the looks of it, it was not the first time he noticed you.
He was sitting at his usual table with Tommy and another guy from patrol you vaguely recognized, the other two men engrossed in conversation while Joel pinned you with his stare. You quickly turned away, your cheeks feeling flush, and tried to focus on your dinner.
"Shit, this looks amazing," you said, distracted by the cheesy, piping hot dish set in front of you.
"I'm telling you, man, it's the fucking best," Ellie told you before digging in. You had to stifle a moan when the food hit your tongue for the first time, eternally grateful for the impeccable timing because all you could think about in that moment was how good it tasted, Joel temporarily forgotten for the first time in days.
"Didn't you eat today?" Dina asked, her lips twitching into a grin, and you shook your head.
"Not really. Haven't had much of an appetite this week," you told her, and Ellie tilted her head to the side.
"Your pain was that bad?"
"Huh?" you asked, then it dawned on you once again. The Lie. "Oh, yeah. I mean, I ate a little, I just wanted to sleep, I guess."
"Joel didn't make sure you ate?" she pressed, her eyes flicking over your shoulder. You dropped your fork, scrambling to come up with yet another lie when her brow furrowed and her eyes narrowed, making you twist around to see what made her demeanor change so suddenly.
As you expected, she was looking in Joel's direction, but he was no longer looking at your table. It was impossible considering Angie was standing directly in front of him, blocking his view with her body, her hand resting on the back of his chair.
"What is she up to now?" Dina murmured to Ellie, but you could hardly register her words. The way your anger ignited deep within your chest and licked up your throat, it was a miracle you even remembered to breathe. Joel's legs shifted, knees turned away from her, but that was all you could see. You couldn't see the look on his face or hear what was said. You couldn't see where his hands were. But you could see Angie flick her long, straight hair over her shoulder with a flirty laugh that was clearly meant to pull attention onto her.
If you didn't have tunnel vision, you would have noticed she was successful. A few heads turned, men's eyes lingering on her backside while women's eyes darted in your direction, but you were incapable of processing any of it. Ellie was saying your name, but you couldn't hear her over the ringing in your ears.
It was less than a minute. Thirty seconds, tops, and she walked away from him with a sickly grin plastered across her face, her two friends returning her mischievous smile before flanking her side, making their way towards the exit like a swarm of bees.
Without even thinking, you stood up.
"What are you doing?" Ellie asked, but you ignored her. Instead, you pushed your way through the crowd in a trance, shouldering people out of your way without so much as an apology, too laser focused on your target to care.
"Joel!" Ellie called out to him. He was rubbing his face angrily, trying to avoid his brother's eyes glaring at him in disbelief over what he just overheard Angie say when he heard Ellie. Great, she knows, too, he initially thought, but when he looked up and saw Ellie and Dina, panic-stricken, making their way towards the exit, he realized something was happening. He didn't see you until you emerged from the crowd and reached for the door, swinging it open and allowing a cool blast of air into the room before disappearing outside.
"Oh, shit," Joel mumbled, snatching his coat and forcing his way through all the people as quickly as he could. Tommy followed, confused at first, until he realized you were no longer at your table and then it clicked.
By the time you made it outside, you nearly missed where they went, but luck was on your side because her high-pitched giggle danced through the bitter cold air and you twisted your head to the left, just in time to see the three women in the shadow of night round a corner and head down a residential street.
You were nearly running to catch up with them, but you couldn't feel your feet hit the ground or hear the gravel crunching under your boots. And neither did they, because when you found yourself less than ten feet away, they were still giggling and talking animatedly amongst themselves, completely oblivious to your presence.
Skidding to a stop, you shouted, "Hey!"
All three women swirled around in surprise, their eyes wide and their smiles slipping from their faces when they sensed the rage radiating from your body. But even still, Angie tried to play dumb.
"Can we help you?" she asked sarcastically with a dry laugh, but when you took a step forward, she went quiet.
"Yeah," you sneered, fists clenching at your sides, "I had a question for you, actually."
Angie looked perplexed, not expecting that, so she held her hands out to her side, urging you to continue while Ellie and Dina caught up, standing a few paces back.
"Did you run out of dick to suck in this town or are you just that fucking bored you thought you'd give home wrecking a try?"
Dina snickered behind you and Ellie gasped.
"Home wrecking?" she replied, raising her eyebrow and crossing her arms. "Is that what you'd call your man following me into the ladies room at the bar so he could shove his tongue down my throat?"
Your nostrils flared and your ears began to make that buzzing noise again, so you dug your nails into your palms, desperately trying to ground yourself.
"Can I even call him your man?" she taunted, feeling like she got the upper hand. "Are you even together anymore? You clearly don't fuck him if he was looking for it from-"
You couldn't even remember moving. Your feet had a mind of their own as you closed the distance between you with two long strides and swung your arm back with as much force as you could muster, backhanding Angie right across the mouth.
Her hands flew up to her face and her two friends stumbled backwards in surprise, but all you saw was red. Before she could recover, you grabbed her by the coat and threw her down onto the muddy street, knocking the wind out of her with a sharp gasp. Quickly, before she could get up, you straddled her midsection. With your left hand pressing down on her chest and your right balled into a fist near your head, you landed a punch right on her perfect little nose with a sickening crunch, causing a trail of blood to trickle out of her nostrils seconds later. But that didn't stop you. You kept going, your knuckles, now bloody, marring her flesh over and over again, but when you made contact with her jawbone, you flinched, a jolt of pain shooting down your middle finger making you pause.
That was when Angie saw her opportunity.
She vaulted you off her with her hips and she rolled to her side, pinning you to the ground with blood dripping down her face. She scratched desperately at your eyes and mouth, your hands coming up to protect yourself with a yelp, before she began landing weak punches against your cheek and mouth. And even though they weren't as forceful as your hits, her weight pinning you down kept you from reclaiming the upper hand.
Ellie and Dina were shouting your name, but you tuned them out. All you could focus on was Angie, blocking her punches as best you could while you waited for your opportunity to take her down.
Then, Angie's hand wrapped around your throat, her fingers pressing into your windpipe. Your hands grabbed her wrist as you fought for air and violently thrashed underneath her.
"Face it," she hissed, leaning down and putting more pressure against your throat, "If it was that easy, I was doing you a favor. He never really loved you, you were just an easy fuck before your brain got all scrambled."
Her words were exactly what you needed to get your second wind.
With an angry roar, you punched her right in the throat, and although you couldn't get much force behind it, it was enough to make her loosen her grip in surprise. And just as Tommy and Joel were running up the street, you tossed Angie to the side and scrambled back on top of her. But this time, you didn't stop.
You were merciless, your hands were a blur. Fists rained down blows upon her face while she desperately tried to shield herself, but it was no use.
"Stop!" she sobbed, begging, but the fear in her voice just egged you on.
Blood began to stain her yellow hair, her perfect skin began to turn red and purple while your fists never stopped, each blow creating a new mark or cut. You couldn't stop if you tried. Something snapped and you unlocked a part of yourself you didn't know, or didn't remember, existed. Some part of you that was a warrior. A fighter. A survivor. And it wasn't until Joel hooked his arms underneath yours and hauled you back that you finally stopped, your chest heaving and your eyes wild.
"Y-you crazy b-bitch!" Angie sputtered, blood trickling from her nose and mouth as Tommy knelt in front of her.
"You haven't seen crazy!" you screamed as you kicked and struggled to get out of Joel's grip. Tommy reached down to help Angie up and he motioned for her friends to come forward. "Stay the fuck away from us or I'll fucking kill you!" you shouted, "You hear me, you fucking whore? I will fucking kill you!"
"Calm down!" Joel yelled from behind, but your blood boiled as you focused your rage on him.
"Get your fucking hands off me," you snarled, wrenching your arms out of his grasp. "This is your fault!" you continued, pointing your finger in his face and backing away, ignoring the tortured look he gave you. A sick part of you was pleased to see the sting of your words land.
"I think she needs to see Nick," Tommy said as both of Angie's friends struggled to help her up.
"She's lucky she's alive," you snapped as you wiped the back of your hand over your bloody face.
"Holy shit, dude," Ellie murmured as you turned around, her eyes all wide with shock.
"I'm going home," you grumbled, wiping more blood from your cheek as you began the journey back to your house on shaky legs, wondering how on earth you were expected to share a space with Joel after tonight. Dina and Ellie exchanged some quick words as you left before Ellie quickly caught up with you.
"I'll clean you up."
"You don't-"
"I know. But I want to," she said, wrapping her arm around your shoulder, and it took everything in you not to lean into her and let her drag you home.
You were exhausted. Mentally and physically. And you just wanted to go to bed. But you were grateful for Ellie. Someone who cared, someone who saw you were hurting and needed help without having to ask for it. So you let her clean you up in your bathroom when you arrived back home, her nimble fingers delicately pressing against your wounds, cleansing them as best she could before pressing band aids and butterfly bandages against your cuts and then making you an ice pack to help with the swelling.
She tucked you into bed and made you drink some water before sitting down on the edge of your mattress with a sigh.
"I had no idea," she began, and you quickly waved her off.
"I know. It's... I know," you said, at a loss for words.
"You didn't really hurt your back, did you?" she asked, and you slowly shook your head. "That motherfucker," she seethed, "I can't believe him, I'm going to kill him, I swear-"
"Just leave him alone," you told her, "Let me handle it."
The two of you sat quietly for a moment, each of you lost in your own thoughts before she spoke again.
"It wasn't like that before," she began, and at first you weren't following, but then you realized: she was talking about before your accident. "You were crazy about each other. Angie was never an issue. Neither of you paid her any attention. She just saw an opportunity and took advantage," Ellie said as her fingers tangled in her lap. "I shouldn't even be saying this, it feels like I'm defending him, but I swear. I was with you guys all the time. You were in love, man."
"Things changed, I guess," you said sadly, but she shook her head.
"You guys are what inspired me and Dina to go for it," she said softly, avoiding your gaze. "We were scared, but I saw how you two were together and how you made it work and, I don't know," she said, picking at her fingernail, "I guess what I'm trying to say is, I look up to you guys. And it's kind of fucking with my head right now that all this is happening."
"Ellie, no," you said, shifting a bit in bed and reaching out to her. "Don't say that. Don't question what you and Dina have because of me and Joel."
She swallowed and looked at you, her eyes soft and worried.
"Why did he do it?" she asked quietly, and you could hear the pain in her voice. Pressing your lips together, you shrugged.
"It's complicated."
She nodded and looked away. "Will you do me a favor?" she asked.
"Yeah."
"Would you give him a chance? Just hear him out and let him explain?" she begged, and you immediately bristled. "You don't have to forgive him. Just... don't give up yet. Please. He loves you, I know it, and... and I think you love him, too."
You scoffed then cleared your throat, your fingers coming up to press gently on your tender neck. "I don't love him," you croaked, but she shook her head.
"If you don't love him then why do you care so much?" she countered, and you fell silent, unable to give her an answer, eyes drifting aimlessly around the room. "Why did you almost kill Angie for sleeping with him if you didn't love him?"
"Sleeping with - no, Ellie. They didn't have sex. He kissed her," you quickly explained, and her eyebrows shot up in surprise.
"You rearranged her face because he kissed her?" she asked in disbelief, then laughed softly and stood up. "I'm not saying he didn't fuck up, but dude. Come on. You gotta see it, now, right?"
You took a deep breath and rubbed your eyes.
"Alright. For you, I'll... talk to him, or whatever," you grumbled half-heartedly.
"Thank you," she said, her voice sounding more like herself once again before turning to leave and allowing you to rest. If you had any inkling she was trying to manipulate you into forgiving Joel, it was quickly expunged because you awoke an hour later to her arguing with him in the living room when he arrived home, the conversation ending with her storming out of the house and then his weary footsteps slowly climbing up the stairs.
Once again, you watched as he paused outside your room, two narrow shadows cast by his legs breaking up the thin beam of light under your door until he thought better of it and kept walking, his own bedroom door closing softly with a click.
The pain was worse the next morning, but you refused to admit it. The cuts burned and the bruises throbbed, but you were too stubborn to let any weakness show, although one look at your bruised neck would tell anyone the truth. You forced yourself out of bed, feeling too guilty to bail on Nick after already taking so many days off to wallow in your own misery, and washed up before heading downstairs. Much to your surprise, Joel was sitting at the kitchen table, his big hand cupping a mug of coffee while he stared blankly at the wall, lost in his own thoughts. When you first saw his face, the bags under his eyes evident, even from across the room, it was clear he hardly got any sleep.
Good, you thought. Then you remembered your promise to Ellie and bit back whatever nasty remark you were getting ready to toss his way. Instead, you dragged yourself to the coffee maker, ignoring the mug Joel left out for you and choosing your own, unable to resist the urge to be just a little bit spiteful.
He cleared his throat as you poured your coffee, a warning he was about to speak, and your shoulders tensed.
"How're you feelin'?"
"About as good as I look," you muttered, bringing the coffee to your lips and taking a tiny sip before turning around. He looked up at you, for the first time seeing the extent of your injuries and he jolted forward in his chair, fighting back the instinct to stand up and inspect your wounds. He blinked rapidly, gaze skirting over your face and neck, worry etching his features until you sighed.
"It's not really that bad," you admitted, looking down at your feet.
"Tell Nick t'give you somethin' when you get to work," he said, voice strained. You nodded and took another sip of your coffee. He swallowed nervously before inching forward in his chair and clasping his hands between his knees. "I'm sorry," he said, the words laced with guilt and shame. "I'm so sorry, I fucked up. But you gotta believe me, I didn't go out that night lookin' for her or anyone else. I just wanted to drink and be alone for a little while." He rubbed his palms over his face while you still stared down at the floor, listening.
"I believe you," you finally said after a tense stretch of silence. He dropped his hands and looked up.
"You do?"
"Doesn't mean I forgive you, but I believe you didn't run out of here looking to shove your tongue down someone else's throat."
He grimaced and dropped his chin to his chest.
"D'you think-" he cut himself off and took a deep breath before forcing himself to look at you again. "D'you think you could ever forgive me?"
You closed your eyes and pressed your lips into a thin line.
"I don't know," you said quietly. Your head was pounding, so you rubbed your forehead, his eyes trained on you anxiously from across the room, knee bouncing slightly as he waited to hear you say anything that would give him a glimmer of hope. "You really fucking hurt me, Joel," you said, trying to hide your lower lip as it trembled, but he heard the pain in your voice and it broke his heart.
"I know, I'm an asshole and I don't deserve you. I never did. Not after what happened at the hospital and definitely not now," he said, standing up and taking a few hesitant steps in your direction, stopping when he reached the kitchen island. "But I'll do whatever it takes. I'll wait as long as I need to, I'll spend the rest of my life makin' it up to you, prove to you that-"
"I don't want to lead you on, Joel," you said solemnly, eyes watering. "I can't promise I'll ever move past it. I'm not sure we're strong enough to get through this."
"Yes, we are," he told you adamantly, "I don't want anyone else. I only want you. You ain't leadin' me on because I don't wanna go anywhere else. I don't care what that looks like in the future, I'll take whatever you give me, that's all I want."
You swallowed hard, trying to ignore the wobble in his voice, and looked into the living room, the framed photo of your house that Ellie drew for you several Christmases ago, the same one you read about in your journal, catching your eye, and you felt yourself tear up.
I just want to go home, you thought, but home no longer existed. This was your home, like it or not.
You turned away, looking out the window over the sink blinking back tears, but Joel had already followed your gaze to the photo.
"I should get going," you said, voice thick. You chugged whatever coffee you could and dumped the rest in the sink.
"I'm gonna make it up to you," he said, following you to the door, "I'm gonna make this right." You scoffed.
"Yeah, okay," you mumbled sarcastically, shoving on your boots and coat before swinging open the door and heading out into the frigid winter morning, big flakes of snow slowly swirling and falling from the sky as Joel watched you trudge down the street, hunched over and curled in on yourself. A shell of the person he knew you to be.
He did that. He caused you pain. And it made him sick.
But at least he finally thought of a way he could prove how much you meant to him.
Sweat covered your forehead by the time you made it to the infirmary, your wool knit cap to blame for the excessive heat pouring from your head while your face was ice cold. You yanked it off your head and shed your coat before making your way to the back, your hair sticking to your forehead. Nick was nowhere to be found, but one of the exam room doors was closed and you heard voices murmuring on the other side. Assuming he had an early patient, you pulled your hair back and got to work. It was supposed to be a quiet day. Nick wanted you to work on an updated inventory list after getting a big batch of supplies two weeks prior from an unexplored hole-in-the-wall pharmacy.
The exam room door swung open, the voices clearer now, and your shoulders stiffened when you recognized the patient. You should have assumed Angie would be there that day, but for some reason it hadn't occurred to you.
Your anger had diffused a bit since the night before, that raw, exposed nerve quelled by time, but that didn't stop you from glaring at her as she passed by the inventory closet. Her swollen eyes widened with fear when she saw you and for the first time, you got a good look at the damage you inflicted. Her nose was clearly broken, she was missing a tooth and both eyes were black and blue, but the cuts on her cheeks and lips were superficial, at best.
She kept walking, not daring to say a word in your direction as your eyes followed her out the door. When she left, Nick turned around with a sigh and crossed his arms.
"How're you feeling?"
You shrugged and turned back to your clipboard. "I'm alright."
"You look like shit," he said, sidling up next to you and plucking the ibuprofen from the shelf. He tapped out two pills and dropped them into your palm before closing the bottle, putting it back where it belonged. "Did you eat?"
With just a shake of your head you popped the pills, swallowing them dry before turning back to your task.
"You gotta eat something with those, it'll tear up your stomach," he said, disappearing down the hallway and coming back a few minutes later with an apple. You grimaced but took it anyway, unable to stop your mind from replaying the memory of peeling apples with Joel just a week prior. Before everything went to hell.
Nick watched you quietly for a moment as you chewed your apple slowly and read down the list of medications on your clipboard.
"Do you, uh," he began, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck, "do you need someone to talk to?" You glanced up at him in surprise and he dropped his hand back to his side. "We don't have to talk about it. But I know you still feel like you're a stranger in this town, and that's gotta be tough." He scratched his greying chin as he glanced around the room and you had to fight back the laugh that bubbled up your throat. You couldn't help it.
He noticed the amused look on your face at his discomfort and pretended to be annoyed when he muttered, "just come find me if you wanna talk or whatever," but you knew it was just an act. Nick was typically a quiet man, kept to himself and hardly ever spoke to his patients, let alone you, his employee, about personal matters. The fact he was trying now must mean he really thought you needed it.
The older man disappeared down the hall to his office and you smiled to yourself, then focused back on work, grateful for something that took your mind off your misery, even if it was just for a moment.
"What the hell do you want?" Tommy scowled when he flung open his door to find his older brother waiting on the other side, hands shoved deep in his pockets, weight shifting foot to foot in an effort to keep warm.
"C'mon, Tommy, I'm gettin' it from all angles, here."
"I don't give a shit," he spat, turning on his heel to retreat back into the house, but left the front door open. Joel took a step inside and quietly shut the door behind him, glancing around the entryway and peering into the living room as he took off his outerwear.
"Maria home?"
"No, she's down at the stables with Violet. Showin' her the horses, gettin' her outta the house," he grumbled, angrily putting away dishes as he spoke. Joel sighed and flattened his palms against the counter.
"I gotta ask for a favor."
Tommy scoffed and shook his head. "You're a piece of work, y'know that?"
"Yeah, I fuckin' know. Jesus Christ, Tommy, I made one goddamn mistake!" Joel yelled, slapping his hand against the cool countertop. Tommy twisted around, brow furrowed, and crossed his arms.
"Don't take an attitude with me," Tommy said through clenched teeth, "I don't give a shit if everyone's gangin' up on you. You deserve it! I thought she was the one you wanted to spend your life with? The one you'd do anythin' for?"
"She is!" Joel exclaimed, raking his fingers through his hair. Tommy's eyes softened while he watched his brother struggle, the enormity of what he did clearly taking its toll.
"Then what the fuck were you thinkin'?" he asked after a few moments, tone pleading. "Everythin' was goin' so well. You guys were havin' a nice time at the party, laughin' and smilin', we all saw it. Then you take 'er home and step out like that?"
"It's not- I was drunk and misread some things," Joel replied, rubbing his eyes with the pads of his fingers. "I tried to kiss her, she shot me down and I didn't take it all that well, alright?" Joel dropped his hand, exasperated, and looked at Tommy once again, taking a deep breath. "Went to the bar to drink and Angie sunk her claws into me. I got the hell outta there and confessed the second I got home but... didn't matter," he said, hanging his head between his shoulders.
"Angie said you followed her into the bathroom, Joel. Don't bullshit me, I was sittin' right there."
"I know, Jesus, it's my fault. I was drinkin' and upset and she was just... there. Pesterin' me and pushin' my buttons. It was only a second, Tommy. Nothin' else happened, y'hear me?" Joel's eyes were wide and desperate as he stared at his little brother across the kitchen.
"It's no excuse, Joel," Tommy said sadly. Joel pushed off the counter with a huff and yanked angrily at his disheveled hair again.
"I know that. I'm just tellin' you how it went down. But I gotta make it up to her. I gotta make it right."
"How the hell do you plan on doin' that? 'Cause from where I'm sittin', only way she could move past it is if I take her back out into the woods so she can hit her head again and forget," Tommy said.
Joel rolled his eyes and slumped into a chair at the kitchen table.
"I got an idea. Don't know if it'll work, but it's all I can think of to prove what she means to me," he said softly, staring down at his fingers twisting together in his lap.
Tommy sized his brother up and down before taking a few steps closer, his hands coming to grip the back of a chair as he leaned forward.
"Let's hear it."
Joel sighed and tilted his chin up. "I need a week off from patrol. I gotta leave Jackson. And I need a horse."
"What?" Tommy asked incredulously. "In the middle of winter? Absolutely not. You'll die out there."
"I survived out there before I came to Jackson, I'll be fine."
"Been a long fuckin' time and you weren't alone when you did it," Tommy argued.
"You offerin' to help?" Joel asked, and Tommy laughed dryly. But Joel continued to stare at him.
"You're serious, aren't you?"
"'Course I am," Joel replied, "she ain't ever gonna forgive me but I gotta do somethin', Tommy. I can't lose her, and right now, it really feels like I'm gonna lose her." Joel's voice cracked and he turned away, looking out the window so Tommy couldn't see the emotion behind his eyes.
Tommy groaned and yanked a chair out to sit down.
"What'dya need me to do?"
It was a long day on your feet and your face hurt more than you cared to admit, so by the time you arrived home, you decided to make yourself a sandwich and go to bed early, skipping an appearance at the dining hall where you knew half the town would be gawking at you and your wounds, anyway.
Fortunately, Joel was up in his room with the door closed when you quietly snuck upstairs with your sandwich. You were still emotionally exhausted from your brief conversation that morning and you were grateful he wasn't looking to have another one.
Nick had sent you home with one of the good pills, as he called it, so you took it with your meal and within the hour, you were out cold. Maybe if you hadn't taken the pill, you would have been awake to hear Joel's bedroom door squeak open, the rustling of fabric and the tinkling of metal cutting through the quiet hallway as he gripped his sleeping bag in one hand and his backpack stuffed with supplies in the other.
Like he usually did, he paused outside your room, his eyes lingering on the doorknob, ears straining for any sign that you were awake, that maybe you had a change of heart and he could call the whole trip off, but he was only met with silence.
He swallowed and turned towards the stairs, quietly tiptoeing down and packed another bag with food from the pantry before setting all three items by the door. At the last minute, he decided to leave a note, not even certain you would notice or care he was gone, but he knew Tommy would be furious when he found out he lied to him earlier and he really didn't want his brother to waste manpower trying to hunt him down in the wilderness. So he grabbed a pen from a drawer and an old envelope. The tip of his pen hovered over the paper as he struggled with what to say, then finally decided to keep it brief before scribbling his note, leaving it by the coffee maker where he knew you would see it.
Lastly, he strode into the living room and grabbed one more thing, shoving it into his backpack before piling on his layers and heading out the front door, giving the house one last forlorn glance before slipping quietly into the night.
It was your day off, so naturally you allowed yourself to sleep in a little, hoping that the extra rest would help your bruises to heal. At the very least, you were pleased to discover the pain around your throat was significantly better than the day before.
You didn't hear Joel when you got up, but that was typical. He usually had early morning patrol shifts and was back by the afternoon, but when you came downstairs and saw the coffee wasn't made like it normally was, you froze. Your eyes drifted around, noticing his coat and boots were missing.
Maybe he was running behind and just didn't have time to make coffee.
As unusual as that might be, it was the only logical conclusion until you walked over to the coffee maker and saw an aged envelope sticking out of your favorite mug. You frowned and picked it up, eyes quickly scanning the words once, then three more times before the panic set in, your stomach churning worse and worse each time.
Tell Tommy I'll be back in a week.
He knows why.
No matter what, just know I love you with my whole heart, in this world or the next.
Joel
Boots unlaced and coat unzipped, you raced down the street towards Tommy's house, the envelope gripped tightly in your fist.
What the hell did that mean? Where did he go? What is he doing? And why did he sneak out without telling Tommy?
You banged on the door, the wood rattling violently under your clenched fist, only afterwards realizing you could have been waking their daughter but fortunately when the door opened, you saw Violet and Maria playing in the living room over Tommy's shoulder.
"What's goin' on, sugar? You okay?" he asked, voice filled with concern when he saw the look on your face.
"Joel's gone," you said hurriedly before pushing past him and entering the house, yanking off your hat and exchanging glances with Maria from across the room.
"Gone? What'dya mean, gone?"
"I mean I woke up today and he was gone, Tommy!" you exclaimed, handing him the note. "Where did he go?!"
You were aware your voice was panicky, that your eyes were wide with fear and your breath was fast and shallow, but you didn't care how it looked to them in that moment.
Tommy scanned the note and sighed, rubbing his forehead before urging you to join him in the living room, where he collapsed onto the sofa.
"That idiot," he murmured under his breath, handing you back the envelope.
"Where is he, Tommy?" you tried again, hoping to sound less frantic this time.
He glanced at Maria before meeting your gaze.
"He was here yesterday afternoon. Told me he needed a favor. Said he needed a week off from patrol and a horse."
"To do what?" you pressed, sinking down into an armchair next to the couch.
"He said-" he cut himself off and looked down at the note in your hand, ticking his jaw to the side as if he was contemplating how much to tell you.
"Spit it out," you demanded, and his eyes snapped back up to you.
"Said he had a plan to make things up to you. For, y'know," he waved his hand in the air, not wanting to say it. You shook your head.
"What was his plan?"
"He wouldn't tell me everything but I offered to help," Tommy admitted, glancing guiltily at Maria who shot him a surprised glare. "Said he needed to go to California, that he wanted to bring a piece of you back. I'm guessin' you're from out that way?" Tommy asked, and you nodded slowly. "He said he would wait 'til I talked to Maria and worked out the schedule but I guess he decided to fuck off-"
"Tommy!" Maria scolded sharply, covering Violet's ears, and Tommy cringed.
"Sorry," he said softly before turning back to you. "Guess he decided to lone-wolf it."
Your eyes drifted back to the note in your hand, swallowing the lump in your throat while your mind raced to catch up.
"What if he doesn't make it?" you asked, eyes still glued to the envelope, "what if he dies out there and it's all my fault?"
They heard your voice waver and exchanged sympathetic looks.
"He made a choice, he knew the risks," Maria said, "but he's a capable guy. If there were anybody who could make it out there alone, it's Joel."
"Listen, I'd send a couple guys out there lookin' for him but there's a storm brewin'," Tommy said, rubbing his chin and glancing out the window. "Been watchin' those clouds build up over the mountains all week. Told Joel as much and he agreed to wait but reckon he changed his mind and wanted to get in front of it."
"Or it was his plan all along to leave alone and he just made sure no one would come after him," Maria said, making the three of you fall quiet.
"God, what do I do?" you murmured, burying your face in your hands.
Tommy glanced at Maria and she subtly nodded towards the kitchen. He stood and cleared his throat before reaching his arms out towards his daughter.
"C'mere, let's get you somethin' to eat before naptime," he said, lifting Violet and taking her into the kitchen to give you both some privacy.
"What's going on?" Maria asked softly as she sat down in Tommy's place on the couch. You sighed and dropped your hands to your lap.
"I don't know," you said truthfully, "I'm so fucking angry at him, but..."
Maria pursed her lips knowingly. "But you still care."
You groaned and leaned back into the chair. "Yes."
"It's not like you're telling me or anyone else something we didn't already know," she said, "not after what happened with you and Angie in the middle of the street. I mean, look at you," she pointed to your bruised neck. "No one fights like that for someone they don't love."
"I don't love him," you said sternly, eyes flashing angrily in her direction. "You sound like Ellie."
"Okay, so if two people are telling you-"
"I don't want to talk about it right now," you abruptly stood up, brushing your palms on your jeans. "Sorry to barge in like this. I'm sure he'll be fine. I'm actually looking forward to a week of quiet," you tried to say confidently despite how tight your throat felt as you headed towards the door.
Maria called your name as she trailed after you, urging you to stay and talk, but you just pressed your lips together and shook your head.
"Seriously, I'm fine," you said, forcing a smile across your face. "I have some stuff to do so I'll see you guys at dinner or something."
Before she or Tommy could say anything else, you slipped out the door and rushed down the street, back towards home.
It wasn't until later that afternoon, after you had scrubbed clean the kitchen and bathrooms, doing anything and everything you could to stay busy, that you noticed the missing picture from the wall in the living room.
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Oscar saying”touch grass and find someone that will fuck you cause it sure as hell won’t be me” and also “in Vegas everyone of you that was rude WILL be going up to my sweet lovely beautiful smart girlfriend and you WILL be apologizing.”
Can you imagine if he ever finds out about the one that burned her with coffee? Oooff she’s done for
𝐮𝐩𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐨𝐩.𝟖𝟏
𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 1.2k words
𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: oscar piastri x fem!black!reader
𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: blurb. part two to a prev. fic.
✧*̣̩⋆̩☽⋆゜omggg i wish i got to this lil addition sooner !!! i was sitting here like lowkey like, how out of pocket would oscar be after he learned that a delusional fan intentionally burned his girl??? but here’s how i think it would exactly go down! this starts pretty much directly after best i ever had ends, like post-bath sex and everything. ✧*̣̩⋆̩☽⋆゜
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your skin is warm, your muscles relaxed, and your legs feel unstable. the phantom weight of oscar resides between your legs from minutes past when he helped you ride him to an orgasm in the bath. to think that if you managed to convince him to break up with you, you’d never have the best sex of your life again.
you’re sitting on the countertop next to the sink, towel slipping down around your waist as oscar massages lotion into your brown skin, when you tell him that exact thought. he’s standing between your legs (his towel securely tucked around his tiny ass waist), wet hair curled on his forehead and he hums in dissent,
“there wasn’t a single time this past month where i even thought about breaking up with you.”
your breath catches at his words and there’s not an ounce of a lie in his tone. after the pampering events of tonight, you didn’t think you needed anymore reassurance that he’s not going anywhere but it’s incredibly nice to hear it. you pause trying to think of the word to express just how sweet oscar is, but he speaks before you.
“woah, wait a minute,” oscar’s brow is furrowed, gaze focused on the back of your left hand, where there’s a slightly inflamed patch of skin, “babe, did you burn yourself? when did this happen?”
he gently brushes his thumb over the spot to gauge how sore the spot is and frowns when you wince and slip your hand out of his grasp. you cradle your hand to your chest and shrug dismissively, “happened earlier t’day at the shop; some girl dumped her coffee on me.”
“what?” oscar stares at you, puzzled, “she purposefully dropped hot coffee on your hand?”
“mmm, well i can’t say that she did it ‘on purpose,’” you sigh, “but, she was wearing an oscar piastri mclaren hoodie and she did laugh about it with her friends afterwards.”
“you’re being serious? a fan dumped a literally burning hot cup of coffee on you,” oscar attempted to clarify, like he can’t believe it.
you miss how his expression is growing stormier and keep rambling on about your experience, “oh, i’m dead serious ‘roo. most of your fangirls have decided that i’m the spawn of satan because i can’t physically be by your side at all of your races. i mean–do they really think i would rather be learning about thermodynamics when i could be on the pitwall?”
“you know, at the end of the day i’m surprised at the fact that she had the balls to do it,” you continue (the aussie looks less impressed the more you keep talking), “highkey, i was getting sick and tired of all the girls who would come up and tell me i made their order wrong–when i most definitely did not!--and i had to remake their drink. so, props to her for changing it up on me, i was not expecting that.”
oscar rubs at his forehead for a few seconds before he purses his lips and cocks his head at the side to look at you, and then it dawns on you…maybe he doesn’t find this as amusing as you did.
“kanga, baby–she burned you. she intentionally harmed you, you could sue her, i think. you should sue her! i, personally, want to ruin her life,” oscar states, dead serious.
you shrug, “it’s not that serious to me. i’ll just put some ointment on it and it’ll be gone in a few weeks. and, she can be as jealous as she wants—you’re still here in between my legs, rubbing lotion into my skin after you just fucked me until my legs were jello. i really could not give a fuck about her, trust that.”
oscar grumbles unhappily, “well, i give a fuck. nobody should think that they can get away with hurting you, regardless of how serious the injury is. where’s the ointment?”
you lean forward, pressing kisses to oscar’s pout, “‘s in the medicine cabinet, ‘roo. if you want to address it, i won’t stop you, you can handle it how you like. as long as it doesn’t get you in trouble with the pr team, i’m fine with it.”
and that’s when you find out just how fine mclaren is with having oscar publicly call his fans crazy.
it’s race weekend in las vegas, and fp2 has been delayed. you were falling asleep on your feet in the garage, so oscar had tucked you into bed in his motorhome, letting you take a nap while he went to do some interviews.
he’s caught by ted kravitz from sky sports and the best opportunity that oscar has ever had falls directly into his lap.
“oscar! how are you feeling, mate?” ted starts, “you certainly had an interesting break leading up to this race, and, you’ve managed to take the world of formula one on another spin with your tweet defending your girlfriend—would you care to expand on that?”
oscar smiles, “i would love to talk about it actually.”
“oh,” ted looks baffled, looking at the camera in shock, before he gestures for oscar to speak.
“well. i stand by what i said,” oscar states, “if anybody thought i was being rude, i really don’t care. what i do find rude, however, is the fact that my girlfriend was being harassed at her job by people who call themselves my fans.”
“oh, mate, i thought you were being rather nice about the situation,” ted offers, “but, you’re saying fans have gone to lengths to ‘harass’ your lovely girlfriend in person?”
“unfortunately, i’m telling the truth. it got to a point where a fan was bold enough to burn her with boiling hot coffee.”
“no!” ted gasps, aghast.
“yes! as soon as she told me, i told her that she should press charges, but she didn’t want to. i guess she’s a lot nicer than me,” oscar scratches at his jaw.
“well, i’m pretty sure that’s at least an assault or injury claim right? i think that fan should be taught a lesson. it’s wild to think that someone who calls themselves a ‘fan’ would hurt one of the best WAG’s,” ted looks disgusted.
“yeah, well–i hope that woman knows the whole interaction was caught on camera and that my girlfriend is well within her rights to press charges. it would suck that an act you committed out of jealousy and envy has the chance to give you a lifelong criminal record, huh?” oscar’s eyes shine with a threatening twinkle, “i can’t imagine being so obsessed with a man you never had and never will have, and you proceed to take it out on his beautiful, intelligent, ambitious, loving, and extremely supportive girlfriend. it kind of seems…” he pauses for effect, searching for just the right word, “...desperate—doesn’t it, ted?”
“it seems absolutely demented, oscar.”
the clip hits three million views in four hours and trends for weeks.
taglist: @saintslewis @cherry2stems @lorarri @inloveallthetime @mindless-rock @biancathecool @barnestatic @my-ylenia @katekipshidze @darleneslane @lovingaphroditesworld @smoothopz @vetteltea @tallrock35 @iloveyou3000morgan @smartstupyd @spideybv28 @loomiscorpse
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#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x female reader#oscar piastri x black!reader#oscar piastri x you#lando norris x reader#logan sergeant x reader#f1 x reader#f1 x female reader#f1 x black!reader#f1 x you#oscar piastri fic#oscar piastri fanfic#formula 1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 smut#oscar piastri smut#formula 1 x reader#f1 fluff#f1 fic#f1 fic rec#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri#formula 1 x black!reader#serene’s chapters.#⋆⭒˚｡⋆. series special: formula 1#♡ ༘*.ﾟ love interest: op.
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crystal clear
Paring: Steve Harrington x fem!reader
WC: 14k (i am so sorry)
Summary: What started as friends “helping” one another out, turns into something much more than either of you anticipated. Secrets are revealed, mistakes are made, and confessions are confessed.
This is the 3rd and final part of this lil unnamed roommate trilogy! You can find part one and part two here!
CW/Tags: language, smut, PiV sex, oral sex (m & f receiving), cum play, super brief anal play, free use, praise kink, humiliation kink, switch!steve & switch!reader, cockwarming, choking, jealousy, angst. Lots. Of. Angst., hurt/comfort everywhere, internalized biphobia, weed mention, happy ending i promise!!
A/N: this took way longer to write than I expected, and apologies for the late post, I had too many technical difficulties 😭 major thanks to @stevenose for hyping this up and helping me on some parts<3 this one’s long as hell, and there’s a LOT going on, but I hope y’all that enjoyed the first two like this one as well. thank you for the support on the others!! <3 title is from a hayley williams’ song by the same name lol.
“Is it weird yet?”
The first time either of you asked the question in the backs of both of your minds, Steve had you bent over the bathroom sink, pulling your hair, forcing you to watch as he railed into you relentlessly.
You can’t remember who asked first, but neither of you answered it. Not out loud, at least. You were too busy moaning Steve’s name to worry about the question.
“Isn’t this kinda weird?”
The question came from you, after Steve came home from a failed date, a failure you silently celebrated. He was in a funk, not expecting anything, but you offered, so how could he say no?
Because turning down the offer of you riding him until he cried—his request, comfortably carried out by you enjoying the mini power trip over your roommate, seemed foolish. You did your best to hide how smug you felt that Steve’s date didn’t work out, so when you offered to cheer him up, and he begged on his knees to touch you, you’d be insane to turn down the opportunity.
“People do this? But that’s… weird, isn’t it?”
“So… what if you’re not in the mood? ‘Cause I don’t wanna initiate anything when you’re not feeling it. Like, I get that’s the whole point, but I’m not trying to make you feel uncomfortable—”
You’re laying on Steve’s bed, the morning after fucking around when you got home from the bar. It didn’t last long, with the two of you too drunk, too tired, getting handsy but being clumsy messes while laughing and falling over one another multiple times.
Instead, you fell asleep in his arms, and you wanted to kick yourself for it.
You’ve been trying to distance your feelings from whatever kind of roommates-with-benefits dynamic had appeared between the two of you, but fuck it wasn’t easy.
“What if I wear something specific when I’m cool with it?” You suggest, tugging on the scrunchie on your wrist. “If I have this on my wrist, you’re free to do whatever.”
Steve was leaning against his dresser, arms crossed as his eyes were glued to your figure, barely covered by an old shirt of his while it clung to the softest parts of you.
He wishes you didn’t look so goddamn cute in his clothes.
“Uh— yeah. Yeah, that works, I guess— ” Steve pauses to overthink. Again. “Are you sure this isn’t too weird?”
“Babe,” It slips out, making you stall as you sit up, clearing your throat to brush past it. “If I thought it was too weird, would I be the one to suggest this?”
Steve blushes, in the way where it’s so much red across his face, it blooms to the tips of his ears. He can feel it, brushing his hair over his ears, ignoring the look you give him.
“Right… Uh, so what should I do? Like, to show you I’m cool with it?” Steve’s puzzled on how this even works, or who would find this hot to begin with. Yet with each confession of what turns you on, the quicker it is for him to get harder with every, and probably any fantasy.
“You want a scrunchie too?” Steve rolls his eyes, but it doesn’t dim the red hue across his face. You giggle at how flustered he is while pulling a thin, black hairband from your other wrist, holding it out. “Would this work?”
Hesitantly, Steve takes the hairband before slipping it over his hand. “Okay, but… What if someone says something?”
You snort, “First of all, it’s just an elastic band. People won’t know. And if anyone’s inspecting your wrists that closely, they’re just fucking weird.” He slips it onto the other wrist, the one his watch is always on, hoping it blends in better. “Steve, now I can’t see it.”
He rolls it over his hand before stretching it between his fingers, playfully shooting it back your way. “Fuck it, I won’t use anything.”
“You sure? That’s— what if I did something when you’re not in the mood?”
“I’ll tell you.”
“Immediately?”
“Immediately. I swear.”
You’ve appreciated how easy it’s been to talk about whatever either of you want, or don’t want. This roommates-with-benefits thing might’ve been awkward, still is if you’re being honest, but talking about boundaries from the start with Steve gave one less thing for the two of you to worry about.
He rubs his jaw, lost in thought. “What’s it called again?”
“Free use, but If you’re not comfortable, or just want it to be one sided, don’t be afraid to tell me.”
“N- no! ” Steve shouts quickly, immediately embarrassed by how desperate he sounds. “I mean… what’s off limits for you?”
You smirk, twirling the scrunchie between your fingers. “Nothin’. You?”
Steve exhales a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Uh… I wanna say nothing, but… if something happens that I’m not cool with, or you’re not cool with, we can stop, right?”
“Yeah, Stevie. We’re not doing this if either of us aren’t into it. If I do something to you that you don’t like, tell me, okay? It’s just like fucking around any other time, but a lil’ more… exciting.”
With a scoff, he sits next to you on the bed, “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were bored when we fuck. You never sound like you’re bored when you’re shouting my name.”
You elbow his side, ignoring the way your stomach flips, “Shut up, I didn’t mean it like that.”
“How’d you even find out this was a thing?” His curiosity’s going to kill him someday, he just knows it, but he can’t stop himself from asking. “I doubt those romance novels get that filthy.”
“Um…” You retreat into yourself, growing shy. “I might have, like, a teensy tiny stash of some… movies… and stuff.”
Steve’s face lights up like fireworks on the Fourth of July.
“You? Since when?!” He’s smirking while regret sets in; should’ve kept that one to yourself. “Wait. Why haven’t I seen you in the back at work?”
Laughing, you admit, “Steve, why the hell would I go where you work to rent porn? I’m not that much of an idiot.”
“Well— I- I wouldn’t make fun of you, y’know.”
Again, you bark out a laugh, “Bullshit, you totally would, especially if you saw wh—” You freeze eyes darting away as your laughter dies in your throat. Steve’s lit up like a fucking city skyline now.
Why, oh why did you have to be cursed with such a big mouth?
“Say it,” He taunts, a smirk growing on his face. “Tell me.”
“Harrington, I’m not telling you a damn thing.”
Steve nods a few times, like he understands, then shoots a mischievous look. “Where’s the tapes?”
“That’s none of your business!”
“Neither was your vibrator dying, but look, it brought us to some good things, right?”
“Th- that’s different, Steve.” You can feel your face heating up, your skin prickling as he puts you on the spot, hand resting on your thigh as he studies your expression.
Leaning in, his voice drops low as he asks, “How different are we talkin’?” His palm is warm, long fingers already close to your heat without even trying.
“Steve…” The warning tone in your voice means nothing to him right now; your gaze follows the direction his hand heads in, inching closer to where you want him most. Where you always want him. Where you always need him.
You expect him to stop, but his fingers ghost over your cunt, covered by the sweet, heart-patterned fabric of your panties— his favorite pair. You shiver as he adds some pressure, slowly rubbing along your sensitive core.
“What, did talking about being used like a slut make you wet already?” Steve taunts, chuckling as you roll your hips forward, trying to chase the feeling he’s barely giving you. “Tell me where the tapes are, and I’ll give you what you want.”
You shake your head, biting your lip to hold back any noises that might give him satisfaction and an ego boost. He mocks you with a pout and a whine.
“Well, guess I’ll have to find ‘em myself,” Before you can register what Steve says, he’s out the door and rushing to your room, while you’re left to shake yourself out of the fog of lust he left you in.
“H- hey! Don’t you fucking dare!”
When you make it to your room, Steve’s on his hands and knees, snooping under your bed. “Not there…”
“Steve, please, ju- just drop it.”
“Why?” He’s having way too much fun teasing you like this, but you’re embarrassed, wishing you could take your confession back. He’s casually opening drawers in your dresser, peeking inside each one with no success. “You wouldn’t have told me if you didn’t want me to see.”
“I— there’s some stuff I wanna keep to myself, I didn’t mean to say anything.” You’re digging your nails into your palms as they roll into clenched fists.
“Thought you liked being humiliated?” When Steve brings it up, it’s part of the teasing, until he looks up to see your uncomfortable body language. He steps away from the drawer he was digging through before making his way to you.
“Hey, I’m sorry,” He comes over to you, cautious as he watches the way your fingers curl into your palms and tense into fists, while you look at the floor, trying not to cry. “I promise I didn’t see anything. And I- I’m sorry for invading your space.”
Steve looks ashamed, and you feel bad. He didn’t know your tears were serious, but you’re already consumed by your own emotions.
You finally look at him, bottom lip curled into a wobbling pout, eyes glassy, “Can I be alone for a bit?”
“You- Yeah, f’course,” Steve automatically wants to comfort you, but he fights it off, just like the time you came home after your awful day, giving you the space you need. “I’ll be…y’know… yeah.”
Steve gently shuts the door behind him, leaving you to cry in the comfort of your own solitude.
···························
A few hours pass, with Steve spending most of it curled up on the couch, trying to mindlessly watch a movie, but he can’t get his mind off of you. He feels horrible that he didn’t catch onto your emotions earlier. He was hoping you’d come out by now, but you’ve been holed up in your room since you asked him to leave.
In the few moments he wasn’t consumed by his guilt, Steve’s thoughts would be spinning, trying to figure out what was on those tapes that would make you so upset if he saw them. Maybe you were just into kink. He wouldn’t judge you for that, everyone’s got their own… interests.
What if they contained something violent, or dark? Again, he wouldn’t judge you, but he’d be concerned for you and your safety. Then again, if it’s between two consenting adults, it’s none of his business.
Still doesn’t stop him from wishing it was his business.
All this time, up until the vibrator incident, Steve had every right to believe you were such a sweet, innocent person. Now, he’s not so sure, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
Steve’s so wrapped up in his own spiraling thoughts, he doesn’t hear you open the door, or walk into the room. Instead, he notices you when you drop a cardboard box on the floor near him, startling him out of his layered overthinking.
“Holy fu— ” He sits up and rubs his eyes before locking his view with yours, heart sinking over how tear stained your face is. How swollen your eyes are. Had you been crying this whole time? “… Hi. What’s— are you— ” Steve’s unsure what to ask first: “what’s in there?” or “are you okay?”
You make it a point to sit on the floor, far from Steve. Crossing your legs underneath you, you’re beginning to pick at your nails nervously, unable to look at him.
“That’s what you were looking for earlier,” You rasp, fighting off another wave of tears.
Steve’s tempted to rip the box open immediately, but he restrains himself. “Honey, if you don’t want me to see, it’s okay. I had no right to dig around earlier, even if I was just joking. I didn’t want to hurt you, but I- I’m so sorry I did. And if it makes you feel better to keep this to yourself, we can forget about all of this. I’ll never bring it up ever again.”
His sweet, apologetic rambling just makes this heavier for you to bear. You lean into your hands, face buried in your palms as you groan, frustrated. “Steve, sometimes I wish you were a dick, because it’d make shit like this so much easier.”
“What are you talking about?”
“At this point it’s just… look, it’s probably for the best you know about this, since we’re fucking around.” You murmur into your hands. “Let me know when you’re disgusted and want me to move out.”
Steve’s brows furrow, really concerned now. “I’d never… I don’t want you to leave. Why would you think that?”
You sit up but look away from him, giving a weak gesture towards the box. “You’ll see.”
Again, Steve hesitates, but you look at the box as you still avoid his gaze, nodding in reassurance. “This isn’t a trick, or anything. I’m letting you— I’m showing you what you should know.”
So, carefully, he opens the box’s flaps one by one before peering inside; Steve slides off the couch and to the floor next to the box, pulling out a tape.
It’s nothing he hasn’t seen before; some tacky porno, with sleazy cover art and a corny title. It’s got your standard, generic shot of a man fucking a woman from behind, with her hands bound in front of her and a blindfold over her eyes.
“This…” He stops himself before finishing with ‘is nothing’, because maybe it’s still a big deal to you. “It’s not worth getting yourself upset over. Why’d you think I’d hate you for this?”
You shake your head. “That’s not the one I’m worried about. I didn’t take anything out, figured I might as well show you everything. Keep going.”
Steve sets the tape on the coffee table before reaching into the box again, pulling out another tape. Similar design layout, but the cover photo is of a woman sitting back, pulling her legs up and back with her, while a man slips a plug into her ass. Steve flips the case over, finding the same couple, positions switched while the woman rims the man.
Steve chokes down a moan, thrown off that you’d be into this, and yet, it’s still not shocking enough to him to warrant kicking you out.
“Y’know this isn’t that bad either, right?”
“Yeah, that’s not the one I’m— you’ll know it when you see it.” You murmur, looking over at Steve, clearing his throat as he adjusts himself on the floor, playing it off like he’s finding a comfy position to sit in. You wish you could tease him over this, but you hold off, knowing he’s going to hate you any minute.
Steve continues plucking tapes out of the box, examining each one, still unsure what would have you so distraught if he were to find out.
Bondage? No big deal. Choking? He kind of figured out you liked that the first time the two of you fucked. It’s common. Free use? You just broke that down for him, so it can’t be what has you upset.
One of the tapes has a few kinks sprinkled throughout; gangbangs, exhibitionism/voyeurism, orgasm denial, femdom—
“Jesus, this one’s got everything, huh?” Steve tries to break the tension, but you don’t laugh. “This… this was the one, right?”
You huff out a mirthless laugh, pulling your knees to your chest before resting your head on them. “I fucking wish, Steve.”
He can’t stand how hard this is hitting you right now. “I don’t need to know, not if it’s going to hurt you. Seriously, it’s your business, whatever it is, and that’s okay. We all have our secrets, right?”
“Jesus fucking christ, Steve.” You scoot over to him and the box, digging to find the one you’re worried about.
“Hey, wait— ” He holds your arms softly, looking into your cry-worn eyes, only making your bottom lip quiver again. “Seriously, you don’t… whatever you’re hiding isn’t for me to know, clearly. And I’m not going to take something that personal to use as leverage to kick you out— why would you even think that? I love living with you. No weird kink is gonna change that.”
The last part almost makes you laugh. Almost.
You wish the way he said he loves living with you didn’t make your stomach flip, either. Any other conversation, that'd be one of the sweetest things he’s ever told you, but you know that’s going to change once he’s too disgusted with you.
When Steve stopped you, your hands had already grabbed the tape. You pull it out, tossing it on the table before pushing yourself back, away from him as you anticipate the worst.
He’s quiet for a bit as you watch his eyes fall on the cover, taking in every detail, flipping it over to read whatever the corny summary says. He looks back at you and just shrugs.
Steve just fucking shrugs.
“Threesomes are… not a big deal. Like, at all.” He doesn’t say this to belittle you or your feelings, more to assure you that there’s worse to worry about than liking porn about threesomes.
You start crying again, silently, as you hug your knees to your chest again. “God, Steve, please don’t make me spell it out.”
As his brows furrow while looking over the tape again, he gives another shrug. “I feel stupid— ”
“You’re not stupid, I promise. I’m just scared to say it out loud to you.”
“Okay, two girls, one guy, having consensual sex together. I genuinely don’t g— ” It hits him, and he feels a little sick, not from your silent confession, not from the topic itself, but the fact he didn’t get it sooner. He hates how he dragged this out, only making you more upset. “... Oh.”
You’re not straight. You clearly still like men, but attraction doesn’t stop there for you. He glances down into the box, finding another tape, one of just two women together. It looks like the one peeking out under that is similar, too.
“Yeah. Yep, okay, there it is.” You push off the floor to your feet, sniffling. “Well, it was cool being friends and… whatever the fuck, but I’ll pack and get myself out as soon as I can.”
Steve scrambles to get up, following you down the hall as you head towards your room, beating you to the doorway. He stops in the frame, blocking you from retreating to the bedroom.
“We’re talking about this. You can’t just… you can’t just drop that and expect me to brush it off, or be disgusted with you. Neither are happening.” Steve’s tone is firm, but everything he says is with care. Your eyes well up with inevitable tears. “Hey, honey, look at me.”
You try pushing past him, but he refuses to let you in. “Stevie, p- please— ”
“No, enough with the hiding. I know this is scary to talk about, but please, don’t shut me out.” He moves into your room, gently pulling you in with him to sit on your bed. “Can I be cheesy and thank you for sharing something so personal? That’s not easy for anyone, but you still did. Even if you thought you had to, that took guts.”
You reach for a pillow to cry into, and Steve doesn’t stop you, just lightly hangs his arm across your shoulders. You lean into him instantly, hugging the pillow for a moment before abandoning it, wrapping your arms around him instead.
“I thought you’d hate me,” Your voice is so small and shattered; it kills Steve that your fear has been weighing so heavy on your mind and heart. “That’s why I was so scared for you to find the box.”
“Nothing could ever make me hate you, angel. I’m sorry I caused so much stress for you.” He hugs you tighter, wishing he could take back these last few hours.
“It’s not like you knew. I’m not mad at you, Steve. I should’ve told you sooner.”
That shouldn’t make Steve huff out a laugh, but it does. The noise he makes turns into a silent, shoulder shaking laugh as he holds you. You’re so confused.
“Steve, what the fuck? You just told me— th- this- none of this is funny.”
He tries to control his laughter, and he does, but only for a moment. A quick pause to kiss your forehead. You push him back, reading his expression, still bewildered.
”I’m sorry, I— ” He runs a hand through his hair as he stifles his laughter, more successful this time. “— lemme grab something quick, okay?” Steve doesn’t wait for an answer, just gets up and rushes to his room, snickering a few times to himself. You’re left baffled.
What the fuck just happened? And what the hell is so funny?
There’s sounds of some movement floating out of Steve’s room, soft grumbles of “where the hell did I put that?” and “jesus this is heavy”, making you smile, ever so slightly. He’s only gone for a moment before he returns with an old milk crate, carrying VHS tapes and magazines, it looks like.
Steve sets it on the bed next to you. “This… this is funny.”
Your brows furrow, still trying to understand what the hell he’s talking about.
“You can look, y’know.”
Most of the content is tacky porn, just like yours, mostly straight couples—
Wait.
You’re about to grab a tape, one similar to the film you showed Steve; another threesome porno, but this one has two men, one woman. It doesn’t take you more than a second to get it.
You snap your head up to look at him, holding the tape up, lost for words. “Are you— shut up. You’re joking.”
Steve leans back against your headboard, hands behind his head, almost appearing smug, but he just finds the coincidence really fucking funny. Sure enough, he starts laughing again. It’s not cruel, nor does it have a sharp edge. It’s just his usual warm, sweet laugh.
“I’d never joke about this. I swear.” His smile is like sunshine peeking out from behind the clouds on a stormy day, making you feel comfortable, happy, even. You’re not alone in this, you don’t have to be. Feelings aside, Steve proves time and time again how thoughtful and kindhearted he is as a friend; a completely different person from who he tried so hard to be back in high school.
“You didn’t have to tell me— n- not that I’m upset you did, just hope I didn’t pressure you to say something by being such a crybaby.”
“No, no way. When you said you should’ve told me sooner, I figured well, shit, I might as well come out to you, too.” Steve admits, “Honestly, I’ve wanted to tell you for a while, but I was scared you’d hate me.”
Your heart sinks; why does coming out have to be such a nerve-wracking event? Sometimes even dangerous if you confide in the wrong person. You’re grateful that’s far from the case here.
“I could never hate you, Steve. Never ever.” Though sincere, your attention falls back on the crate, eyes dancing over all of the tapes and magazines when a certain photo sticks out like a sore thumb.
He notices the way you pause, eyes falling on the familiar white border of a Polaroid, peeking out among the mess of filth. He lunges to grab it, but you beat him to it. Your jaw drops with a gasp at the lewd image.
“Steve, this is— ” He reaches out to grab it, but you push back, stumbling as you stand before rushing across the room, Polaroid in your hands. You stare at the photo in awe.
Striding across the room, Steve makes his way to you, about to grab the photo from your grip, “Give it back— ” You hide it behind your back while you’re against the wall, tucked in the corner with a smirk.
“Fuck no, this is karma for making me cry,” You giggle, causing relief to wash over Steve. He’s not even mad about this. He’s just happy to hear you laughing after today. You spin around, head ducked against the wall, studying the photo. “You’re so pretty on your knees, Stevie.”
Steve ignores how your comment makes his stomach flip, sneaking his hands around you to snatch the photo back. Eyes rolling, he jokingly grumbles, “Yeah, yeah, you had your fun.” You twirl around, attempting to grab it back, but he effortlessly holds it high above your head. He tries playing off the blush that rises up his neck and to his cheeks over your comment.
You can’t help thinking, How’d you even fit that into your mouth?
Steve chokes on air, eyes wide, “W- what?”
Apparently, you think out loud now.
“M’sorry,” You whisper, cringing at yourself. Steve just shakes his head as he clears his throat between laughs. He ends up sitting at the edge of your bed, tugging you closer to him, hands in yours.
Glancing up, he locks eyes with you while softly asking, “Are you disgusted by me?”
You stare at Steve, unsure if he’s joking or serious. “What? Because you’re not straight? No way, why would you even ask— ”
He holds his arms out with a lazy shrug. “There ya’ go, there’s my answer to you, too.” It takes a minute for you to understand what he means.
Why does he always have to be a smug little shit when he’s right?
“Okay, wait. Why the fuck were either of us worried? We’re both still friends with Robin, even after she came out.” You and Steve lock eyes before bursting out into laughter.
“It- it’s different when it’s just a friend!”
“Thought we were just friends.” Steve forces a teasing tone to his words, but maybe you’d answer differently this time.
“Well, yeah, but— it’s different since we’re fucking.”
So much for that.
It’s silent for a beat before Steve mutters, “We’re both morons.”
You smirk, “Now, that picture on the other hand, disgusts me,” Steve’s smile falters, your words making him nervous. “Because it looks like you’re totally better at deepthroating than I am.”
His jaw drops, face flushing red. “Okay, listen—”
“That’s a compliment, I promise!”
“Uh-huh, sure.”
Steve plucks the scrunchie on your wrist back, letting go to softly snap against your skin. “This still okay?” Your breath hitches as you nod, feeling a hand slide to the small of your back, bringing you even closer to him.
“You- you don’t have to ask, that’s the whole point,” You rasp, trying to suppress the breathy, light groan threatening to break.
“Oh, I know,” Steve gets up, smirking down at you over how flustered you look. “Just wanted to make sure.” He slides past you to reach for the crate of filth before leaving the room.
Resisting the urge to let out a disappointed groan, you mutter under your breath, “Are you fucking kidding me?”
“I’m not,” Steve quips as he walks by your room. Now you groan dramatically, and he just laughs while making his way down the hall.
Two can play that game.
You find Steve in the kitchen, looking around in a drawer, until you come up behind him and slam it shut. Startled, he jumps, and you take the opportunity to flip him around to face you, hands grabbing his hips before pinning him to the counter.
“Whoa— ” Steve’s eyes are wide at the abrupt maneuver, “—what are y- you- oh, shit.”
In the blur of manhandling him, Steve didn’t realize his pants are already around his ankles, not until you begin stroking him slowly. He grips the edge of the counter as a shuddered breath slips out, watching you from under hooded eyes.
You spit onto his length, coating his skin for a smoother glide, one that makes his hips buck roughly, challenging the grip you still have on one of them. When he settles down, you lick slowly along the underside of his cock, eyes locked on his as your tongue makes its way to the base, then down to his balls.
As you begin lapping and sucking, Steve’s head falls back against the cabinet, a classic move you usually make; halfway through one of the prettiest moans he’s made yet , he grumbles an “Ow, what the fuck?”
Naturally, you laugh, but with him in your mouth, the sensation of your muffled sound replaces his ruined moan with another. “Fuck, fuck— honey, I- god, I need you.”
His words bring you back to his shaft, one hand toying with his balls, while another reaches around to squeeze his ass, all while you take him into your mouth fully. “H- ohmyfuckinggod,” Steve’s face contorts into an expression at the crossroads of being pained and absolutely blissed out.
While you bob up and down on his cock, making him rasp out an airy cry when he hits the back of your throat, your hand on his backside inches towards his taut, sensitive hole.
He shivers, overstimulated by all three of your actions, “H- hey, angel, you… fuck… y’don’t gotta do th—” His words die on his lips, replaced by a throaty groan as your finger gently circles the tight ring; you moan around him, and he’s a goner, spilling into your throat without much warning.
You were going to leave him with a ruined orgasm, but another idea pops into your head.
“Fuck, fuck m’so sorry,” He’s babbling apologies as his hands fly to your head, holding you down onto his cock, still using your mouth as a personal cum dump. His chest heaves as his high winds down, hands letting up on your head, too.
Back on your feet, you kiss him roughly, but as he allows you in, you’re swapping spit with cum; surprised, he whines into your mouth as he pulls you against him, kissing back with a desperate, pathetic fervor. His fingers dig into your hips, tongue gliding along yours while he tastes himself. As you break the kiss, you murmur against his lips, glistening with the lewd slick, “Swallow.”
With a wicked smile, you step back and watch as he follows your command, adam’s apple bobbing before his mouth falls open with heavy pants.
You stretch up to kiss his cheek, whispering, “Good boy,” before turning on heel, leaving the room quiet, and a breathless Steve who feels filthy.
···························
The next day, you’re up early to catch up on some priorities, including some chores. You’ve got your headphones on while vacuuming, bopping around and (poorly) singing along to I Wanna Dance With Somebody while sweeping the hallway. Both the music and high pitched, droning suction of the vacuum block out any sound, especially Steve sneaking up behind you.
In one swift motion, he pulls your shorts down and pushes into you immediately. The surprise stretch makes you cry out in a little bit of agony, and a whole lotta’ bliss. You’ve got one hand on the nearest wall, while the other keeps you balanced on the vacuum handle as he lifts your leg to go deeper.
Steve rips your headphones off, “Are you always this fucking wet?”
You can’t answer, not with words, not when every and any thought has been fucked out of your head already. All you can do is whimper as your eyes roll back further with each rough slam into you.
The harder he thrusts, the closer you move to the wall, until you’re completely shoved against it. One hand wraps around your hip, the other tangles into your hair to pull you out and bend you over even more. All that holds you up is the wall against your chest, shoulders, and head, along with his grip, departing from their original spots to tug your arms behind your back and restrain them.
“Stevie…”
“This what y’wanted? With your gross, little fantasy?”
You shake your head— not the easiest when you’re shoved against the wall— pouting, and Steve immediately slows down, almost completely. “What’s wrong?”
“More,” is all you can rasp out.
“More… what?” Ever so slowly, he begins to move again. It’s still not enough.
“H- harder,” You murmur, and Steve mockingly hums in understanding, shoving himself to the hilt, knocking the wind out of you.
“Was that it?” He’s asking but he knows the answer.
“Faster,” Your needy little whine is just what he wanted to hear.
His pace picks up, unforgiving while railing into you, “That’s my girl.”
It doesn’t take much longer for Steve to climax, leaving you dripping, without release as he pulls out, satisfied. He swipes two fingers between your folds before they slip inside you, pushing his cum back into your entrance, laughing cruelly at the way you clench around him and groan tiredly.
Steve pulls his fingers out and brings them to your face, tapping your lips with the sticky, pearly slick covered fingers. “Open.” You obey, and gag as he shoves his fingers back farther. They slip back out, and he squeezes your face, mocking you from the night before, “Good girl.”
As he retreats to his room, you’re left alone, still an aroused mess, barely holding yourself up against the wall while trying to catch your breath.
···························
In the last few weeks, you’ve grown more comfortable with less clothing around Steve at home. He’s not complaining, especially later that night, when Steve watches you pass his room with the infamous vibrator in hand. Your outfit of a comfy bralette and shorts earns a double take from him.
“Hey, where ya’ goin’ with that?” He smirks at the bothered look on your face, probably still wound up from being used like a toy earlier, abandoned without your own climax.
“Shut up, Steve.” You grumble, but still stop in his doorway, flicking the switch on the wand on and off. Nothing happens, and you pout. “I think it died.”
“So… put new batteries in?”
“No, it’s like, dead dead. This was the third round of new batteries I put in, and still, nothin’.” You sigh with a shrug, “Eh, good riddance, I guess.”
You’re about to leave when Steve murmurs, “Not like you need it now.” Your face heats up and something pulls in your lower stomach.
“I mean… I do.” You walk away, and Steve follows you out the door.
“Huh? Why? You’ve got me.” It’s supposed to be a teasing joke, but it comes out more sincere than Steve intended.
“I- I’m not gonna just expect you to be in the mood whenever I am and need to… y’know.” Flipping the garbage can lid open, you drop the defunct sex toy into the trash. “Thanks for the memories, you stupid, janky wand.”
Steve snickers, “Yeah, the best memory being the day you needed my help.”
Ignoring him, you grab a glass from one of the cabinets, heading to the sink, but he leans against the edge to block you from the faucet.
Steve smirks; this could be fun. “And no, I don’t know. Why don’t you tell me?”
“See, that’s why I like my vibrator. It can’t sass back like a certain someone.”
“There’s many ways to shut a certain someone up.” You shove Steve aside and he scoffs. “Alright, well, next time you need to get off, don’t come crying to me.”
When he leaves, he ends up in the living room, turning the TV on before flopping onto the couch.
You frown and crinkle your brows as you shut the faucet off, muttering in a mocking tone, “Don’t come crying to me. Blah blah blah.”
“Heard that,” Steve flips you off, and from where you’re standing in the kitchen all you see is his arm shooting up above the couch, making you giggle.
“Wasn’t trying to hide it.” You shuffle over to the couch, about to sit on the opposite end of Steve, but he lets his arms fall open lazily, looking at you expectedly. “What?”
“C’mere,” He whines, forcing a pout.
You narrow your gaze, setting your glass on the table. “My vibrator wasn’t this needy, either.”
Steve leans forward, grabbing your hand as he pulls you back down near him. You yelp, landing next to him, fidgeting a bit to get comfortable. “Yeah, well, your vibrator wasn’t this hot, so is it really that much of a loss?” His arm hangs over your hip, while the other reaches for your back; he traces mindless patterns along your exposed skin, prickling as you shiver.
With your back to the TV, its glow slips over you and onto Steve, illuminating his features as the two of you grow into a comfortable silence, as your hands lazily wander his body. It’s only sweet, gentle caresses from the both of you, something you wish you could get used to. Something, a small, mundane detail you wish the two of you had in a relationship.
Except, there is no relationship, and you have to remind yourself often you can’t become more attached and attracted to Steve than you already are.
You’re just friends.
“This is… kinda nice,” He murmurs as you duck your head under his chin, cuddling closer.
Just friends. Just friends. Just friends.
“Y’know, if you ever just wanted to, like, hang out like this… I’m cool with it if you are.”
“‘Hang out’, I didn’t know cuddling had a new name,” He softly teases, embracing your frame. “Hey, I’ve been wanting to ask you something, you got a minute?”
“No, Harrington, I’m actually late for a meeting at…” You turn over to read the wall clock, glancing back at Steve, “… 8:36 p.m. We can reschedule for tomorrow though!”
“You’re the worst.”
“But I’m the best at being the worst, right?”
He doesn’t answer, just gives a drawn out, exasperated sigh before letting his head fall forward, onto your shoulders while he sneakily pushes his pants down. Just enough to free himself. He rests there for a few moments before he pulls the fabric of your shorts aside, teasing the head of his cock at your entrance. You whimper and push back against him right as he guides himself into you. The stretch, as always, renders you silent as you adjust to his size.
“Is this what I have to do when you won’t shut up?” His arm winds around your neck, bringing your back flush against his chest; he’s not choking you, but when his arm flexes around your throat, your walls constrict around him. “Yeah, thought so.”
You wait, but no movement comes. No rocking his hips into you, no slow, teasing thrusts; Steve just lays behind you, buried deep in you, enjoying the way you squirm.
“I wanted to get you off to make up for earlier, y’know, just trying to be a good friend,” The last two words came out with an edge. “Trying to reward you for being such a good little fuck toy,” His arm tightens a bit, adding the tiniest bit of pressure; you throb around him, shuddering. “But now, I think you can just keep me warm instead.”
“Steve, please… I- I‘ll be good, I’ll be so good,” You babble, desperate for some kind of movement, some kind of friction, anything. He tightens his hold on you a little more, laughing breathily into your ear as you try moving. You gasp, “Touch me, p- please?”
“I’m already touching you.”
“That’s not what I mean!” You’ve got a short fuse when he riles you up just to drag out the teasing.
Just like the first time, neither of you know when to quit.
“Okay, so what do you mean?”
Whether it’s from the teasing now, or being used earlier. Maybe it’s both, mixed with the feelings you have for Steve that are getting too overwhelming. Whatever the case, you get pissed off enough to touch yourself instead.
“I didn’t say— ”
“I don’t fucking care what you didn’t say, if you’re not gonna do it, I will.”
Sometimes the tension makes you mean, and it’s something Steve likes, but refuses to admit, with his words, at least.
His throbbing cock inside of you, on the other hand, has no problem telling the truth.
“Well, fine, guess you don’t need me then,” Steve’s arm loosens from your neck as he begins to slip out, but with all of your strength, you reach back to hold him in place. It’s an awkward position, sure to make your arm sore tomorrow. You open yourself up a little more, throwing a leg back over his.
“You’ve been teasing me non-fucking-stop, asshole. Least you can do is stay while I get off.” Your fingers try finding a satisfying pattern to tease your clit with, but you’ve been so spoiled with your stupid toys, and Steve, it doesn’t feel the same. Doesn’t feel as good.
You can feel the smirk Steve makes as he leans against your shoulder, looking over to watch your hand and fingers struggle to keep you blissed out.
“Aw, honey, is it too hard for you?” He kisses the back of your shoulder, then slowly makes his way with more up your neck. Your breath shudders as you clench around Steve, just from his words alone. “Doesn’t feel as good as that toy, huh?”
You can feel hot tears begin to surface; you’re angry that you can’t make yourself feel good, angry that he’s taunting you after trying to take over and show him you didn’t need him.
But you do need Steve, and that’s been fucking with you so much since the first time the two of you kissed. That alone had you soaked, but right now, your own fucking hand isn’t cutting it, and you’re angry at how embarrassing this is.
Sure doesn’t stop Steve from humiliating you, though. “Doesn’t feel as good as my hands, hm?”
You bite your lip, holding back groans of frustration, but Steve can feel how tense you are.
“Must not feel the same as my tongue. Not even close,” he murmurs into your ear, kissing the skin behind it, then back down to your jaw. “No way those fingers can ever feel like my cock.” He nips at your jawline, “I bet you can’t get rid of that ache between your legs, not without my help. You need me, don’t you?”
Steve slides his hands onto your chest, tugging the bralette down before roughly, yet slowly, grabbing you. He pinches your nipples, enjoying the view of you arching into his touch, whimpering as your hand slows down on yourself, defeated.
“Tell me.”
“Tell you what, Steve?” You spit through gritted teeth. He grabs your face to bring your attention to him. Something flashes across his eyes at the sight of you near tears, not lust, not desire, but you can’t figure out exactly what it is.
“That you need me.” You tighten around him, already giving your answer. He smirks, but again, something’s hidden behind that dominant exterior, past the pleasure over humiliating you.
What the fuck is he hiding?
“I d- don’t,” You lie, but your wobbling pout gives you away immediately.
“Angel, the sooner you tell me, the sooner I can help you.”
You’ve abandoned touching yourself completely, exhausted and embarrassed. Holding one another’s gaze, there’s a softness in Steve’s eyes that makes you finally break. “I- I need you, Steve. Please?”
One hand still teases your nipple while the other slides down, down, down, reaching your waistband before he pulls out completely, causing you to whine in protest.
“Hang on, angel,” He pulls your shorts off completely, leaving you bare before gently sliding back into you, groaning, “Wanted t’really feel you.”
Sex with Steve has usually been rough, or fast, or both. It’s usually needy with desperation to get off. Sometimes there’s a fantasy one or both of you want to fulfill.
This… this is different. Just like the look Steve held, you can’t figure out what is different, but it’s not bad.
In fact, you might like this the most.
“You want me to move?” Steve asks, and it’s not cocky. It’s not the demeanor he was teasing you with before.
“I don’t— do whatever, just need you to touch me,” Your whining is pathetic, but at least he finally reaches down to where you need him. His fingers slide between your folds, groaning when he meets the slick of your arousal. He’s slow, not painfully slow, rather careful as he thrusts into you. It’s soft, and you can feel every inch of him, really feel him.
“This okay?” His breathy question is just above your ear while he kisses along the shell of it.
“So, so okay.” This position might be your favorite, with the way he’s so deep in you, forcing your eyes to roll back into your head as he fills you completely. You lean back into him, and he takes one look at you before leaning in to kiss you, like he knew what you were silently asking for.
It’s soft, languid, the kind of kisses that make you squirm with a certain need, one he’s fulfilling right now.
Pulling back, his lips barely touch yours when he teases, “You’re s- so tight… y’really like it soft, huh?”
You only answer with a nod and a whimper, leaning in to kiss him again, but he moves back with a smirk. It’s not taunting, for once. He’s just really enjoying how turned on you are right now. How much he’s turning you on.
“I like it w- when we— god, fuck— when it’s…” You’re struggling to find the right words, fucked out already. Steve still watches you, listening intently as he can feel your walls pulse around him “… Intense, but this is s- so— oh!”
It’d almost be embarrassing how fast he can push you over the edge, but it feels far too good to care. You shake against him, tensing up as your head lolls back against his chest, jaw dropped in a silent moan. Then, it finally slips out, and it’s loud.
“Good girl,” Steve murmurs, kissing your temple. “Doing so— fuck— s- so good for me.”
Before you can even rest, he convinces you to let him keep going, give you more pleasure, murmuring how you’re ‘his girl’, how you can take one more, just ‘one more’.
By the third round, Steve’s question is long forgotten by both of you.
···························
“Why am I taking the backroads again?”
“It’s a… nicer ride. Just trust me.”
Steve drove along the lonely, winding road. The sunset began to blanket the sky in hues of oranges, purples, and pinks.
“Okay, but… you know it’s a longer drive this way, right?”
You’re leaning over the seat to unzip his pants, and Steve freezes, but not before hitting the gas by accident. He only speeds up a little before catching himself. “Are you trying to kill us?!”
“I only touched your pants. Are you really that sensitive?”
“I- I just didn’t expect it— I’m driving and trying to be safe.”
“Yeah, and I bet you look both ways before making a turn, too.”
“I do!”
You pull his cock out, half hard already, and waste no time leaning down to lick up the precum already beginning to seep out.
“H- hey!”
You pull off. “What? Don’t want this? I can stop.”
“This- it’s just— unsafe.”
“Is that your only complaint?”
“Well… yeah, I gu— shit- ” Steve tries suppressing a moan as you take him in completely without hesitation, and the sound that leaves him just sounds strangled and pained. He white knuckles the steering wheel while your eyes water, gagging around him.
Not a soul to be found on the roads, and Steve’s still nervous he’ll hit something. Or someone. But you’re humming around him, and making these sweet, little gagging noises, he has to remove a hand from the wheel to pull you off of him.
With his strong hand, he yanks you back, still focusing on driving. “I thought you’d like this,” You pout, backing off as you settle back in your seat. “I’m sorry.”
“I do, but I- I think I like it a little too much. As much as I want you to finish, I need to make sure we get to Robin’s... Um, alive.”
“Okay, well… What are y’gonna do about that,” You point to his crotch, cock still hanging out of his pants, flushed red with need with precum still pearling at the tip.
Steve sighs, exhaling roughly through his nose, thinking for a moment as he drives on. He mutters a quick ‘fuck it’ before grabbing you by the hair to pull you back onto him. He doesn’t miss the mischievous smirk that flashes on your face before he shoves your mouth onto his cock.
“You— mnfph— that’s it, just— oh, g- god— relax, angel, relax that p- pretty throat f’me,” His cock twitches against your tongue, making you moan. “Wish I could fuck your face right now.”
Popping your mouth off of Steve, he catches a quick glance of your lips covered in your spit and some of his own mess, “Fuck…” You wrap your hand around his length, stroking him slowly.
“Kinda wish we did this on the highway instead,” You murmur as your lips attach to his neck, sucking the sensitive skin softly. Steve’s eyes almost flutter shut, but he forces himself to grip the wheel and keep his eyes on the road. “It’d be kinda hot, huh? Trying to do this without gettin’ caught.”
“Uh-huh…”
“Soooooo… If I keep going, can you finish before we get there?”
Steve’s answer comes in the form of his hand on your head, twisting his fingers into your hair before shoving you back down on his cock.
···························
It’s under an hour since you and Steve got to Robin and Vickie’s new place, where she said it’d just be a small, casual housewarming party, and two things have you incredibly bothered right now:
This party is anything but small— you didn’t think Robin even cared about this many people to invite them over.
Steve’s kissing someone else right now.
While wandering around to find Steve and ask if you could leave early, you stumbled upon Steve playing goddamn tongue hockey with someone else.
If it happened when you and Steve were just friends, you’d be happy for him, genuinely. Hell, even if the two of you were FWBs and you had no feelings for him, you’d be thrilled he felt comfortable enough to kiss someone tonight that wasn’t a cis woman.
Shit, you’d even be a solid wing-woman and cheer him on for any action. Yet your feelings for him just turned it all into envy. Nothing but envy coursing through your veins. You had no right to say anything in the first place, because it’s not like the two of you were actually together.
It still didn’t settle your jealousy, or the overthinking triggered by the mixed signals he’s given over the last few weeks. The audacity, too, for Steve to pull this only hours after you fucked… just one hour after you gave him road head—
Yeah, you had to leave, ASAP.
“Hey, where ya’ goin’?!” Robin slurred after you, too drunk to get up and check if you were okay.
So you just call over your shoulder, “This was fun, but I gotta go home!” And you knew damn well you weren’t fooling anyone with the way your voice wavered; you hoped everyone was too drunk or distracted.
The front door creaked open as you hurried down the porch steps, relieved to breathe some fresh air, at the very least. The soft song of the crickets in the woods kept you company.
Your arms are crossed over your chest, shielding yourself from the breezy spring air. You wish you didn’t leave your jacket in Steve’s car, but this was better than having to see him kiss someone else.
Until a familiar BMW pulls up alongside you on the empty street.
Harder to shake than a cold.
Rolling the window down, Steve calls out, “Angel, why are you trying to walk home?”
“Don’t you have a throat to shove your tongue down, or something?”
Steve taps the breaks as he mutters, “Fuck.”
“Surprised y’all didn’t do that, either.” You continue on, and he continues following you in the car.
“Please, just let me drive you back? Don’t have to talk to me or anything.”
“No thanks, I can get home on my own just fine.”
Steve hits the breaks, sighing as he throws the car in park. He steps out of the car, leaning on the roof. “Yeah? What direction is home?” You spin around, walking backwards as you throw your arms out, exasperated.
“Fuck you, Steve.”
He bites his tongue, resisting the urge to say some stupid shit like “Already did”; riling you up wasn’t the answer right now. You angrily point in the direction you’ve been walking, continuing on with all the confidence in your body.
“Try again.” His remark makes you whip around, flipping him off, before marching on in the wrong direction again.
Okay, he deserved that, at the very least.
Steve jogs to catch up to you, though it’s not like you made it very far, stumbling over your own feet. You’re about to lose your balance when Steve makes it to you, just in time, catching you mid-fall.
“Alright, c’mon,” He groans as he attempts to get you stable on both feet, before slinging your arm around his shoulders, and yours around his waist. He guides you back to the car, not giving into your little grumbles and protests as he helps you into the passenger seat.
An agonizing silence settles between the two of you on the ride home, and you’re not sure if you can break the silence without crying. So you don’t. Steve has no problem speaking up first anyway, otherwise, the silence will just send his anxiety skyrocketing.
“I’m sorry,” He sounds sincere, as always. He tears his eyes from the road for a moment to glance at you, only feeling worse when he can really see how hurt you are. “I didn’t… I didn’t think it was like… that. With us, I mean. And I’m sorry.”
“S’fine,” Your voice wavers with weakness, “I know what this was. I- I knew what we were getting into. If anyone should apologize, it’s me, ‘cause I had no right getting jealous.”
Steve forgets his response immediately, pausing a moment to take your words in.
“You were jealous?” He almost sounds pleased to hear you admit this.
Oh, god fucking dam—
“….. No?”
“You literally just said you got jealous.”
“I- I don’t— shut up. You misheard me.”
“Oh, I did?” Steve Harrington can be such a smug and snarky motherfucker sometimes. “What’d you say then? Just wanna make sure I hear you correctly this time, honey.”
You fire back, “Don’t fucking call me that.”
“Should I just call you a brat instead?”
“You know what, Steve?” You glance over and he’s still smirking like an asshole. “Don’t talk to me for the rest of the ride. Or the rest of the night.”
His face falls. “Why not?”
You don’t answer, just cross your arms and tilt your view to the window, watching the world pass by.
“Are you really gonna shut me out? Over this?”
Again, you hold back any responses. Let him dig his own grave at this point.
“You’re the one who kept saying we’re just friends.” As he reminds you, his fingers are clutching the wheel tightly, eyes glued to the road. “You’re the one—“
“No, Steve. You are the one who said from the start friends can fuck around. You said ‘what are friends for?’ after you went down on me.”
So much for your petty silence.
“You continued it! You said ‘this is what good friends do for each other’, and that fuckin’ around is just helping each other out. How was I supposed to know you wanted more?”
Steve had a point. You tried lying to yourself that you ended up sending the wrong signals his way.
“I— Look, I’m sorry I kissed someone else. And this doesn’t excuse hurting you, but did you ever think maybe I was doing my best not to fall for you?” As he pulls up to the apartments, he sinks into his seat, sighing. “I should’ve been honest from the start, or maybe should’ve ran out for batteries instead of fucking around with you and both of our feelings to begin with. I’m sorry.”
You’re exhausted and intoxicated, out of energy to continue this. Unable to look at Steve, you mutter, “Can we just… talk about this tomorrow?” There’s no chance for him to answer, because you’re already out of the car and making your way through the lobby and to the stairs.
···························
Steve took his time returning to the apartment, wanting to give you space, but also in case he got upset enough to cry, too.
He was so, so fucked, and now… he fucked everything up. Sure, you didn’t make it crystal clear how you felt about Steve when you could’ve so much earlier. But it’s not like he did any better.
When he enters the shared space, everything’s dark, and quiet. He figures you went to sleep, since your bedroom’s door is closed. To his shock, though, he finds you asleep in his bed.
Maybe you mistook his bed for yours while being drunk and tired. Steve’s unsure if he should sleep on the couch, to give you more space. But maybe you fell asleep here purposefully. Or maybe you waited here for him and eventually passed out, too tired and upset to keep yourself awake.
You’re half covered by the blankets, wearing only your panties and his shirt again, the one you’ve practically stolen at this point. Steve notices your scrunchie still on your wrist, the subtle symbol you’d give if you were in the mood for free use play. He also notices the way your skin is prickling up; you’re definitely cold, but you’re too drunk to wake up and do something about it.
Steve reaches down and slips the scrunchie over your wrist, setting it on the nightstand, then pulls the covers over you. Immediately, you curl into the blankets, making the softest hum of contentment, falling deeper into sleep.
Or so he thought.
As he changes and strips just to his boxers, Steve hesitates, questioning again if he should sleep here, or the couch. Consumed by trying to make the best choice, mainly for you, your hand reaches out and grabs his leg weakly.
“Stay?”
Your eyes are red, both from exhaustion and crying. Steve feels awful.
He also can’t pass up an opportunity to tease you lovingly. “Honey, I appreciate the invite, but this is my room.” Your hand lifts to flip him off. “Yeah, there she is.” He huffs a quick laugh out, before double checking, “Are you sure you want me to stay? I- I can give you space if you need.”
“I need you, not space.” You roll to the other side of the bed, throwing the covers back. “Please?”
Steve felt his heart ache; this wouldn’t make the dreaded conversation any easier by morning, but he didn’t want to say no, because in some backwards way, the two of you need one another right now.
He crawls in next to you, pulling the covers back up over both of you. He holds himself back from reaching out for you, an action that’s become second nature over the last few weeks.
Instead, he asks, “Can I hold you?” Steve hates the way his voice cracks with longing, giving away how awful he felt. For himself. For you. For the both of you. It wasn’t supposed to end up in this strange suspension between lust and love. It should’ve stayed a one time thing, if at all.
Only silence comes from your side of the bed as you’re already falling back asleep. Steve turns over and hopes sleep can come that quick for him, too.
····································
When morning arrives, you wake up peacefully, naturally, and with a major headache.
“Fucking christ.”
You roll over, realizing the other side of Steve’s bed is empty.
Wait. Why am I here?
You didn’t forget last night, but you can’t come up with a good reason as to why you decided to fall asleep in Steve’s bed instead of your own. Not a justifiable reason in sight after the car ride home.
Blinking a few times as you adjust to the bright light, something on the nightstand catches your eye.
It’s a note, with a water bottle and your cute little pipe with a packed bowl. A smile joins your features as you read the note.
hey, angel. figured you might need these for the rough hangover.
if you still wanna talk when I get home, we can. if not, we can do whatever makes you feel comfortable about us. either way, you better stay hydrated today. or else. not sure what the ‘or else’ is yet, but I mean it. drink your damn water.
— steve ♡
While the note, the tiny heart near his name, and kindness behind it made your smile grow, your heart aches at one line.
We can do whatever makes you feel comfortable about us.
It’s sincere and considerate, like Steve is, other than last night, but he didn’t know. He didn’t know you fell for him during all of this, so could you even count that against him?
Steve’s more worried about your comfort in all of this than his own; he always does this, he always puts everyone’s needs and feelings first.
Before you can even fully wake up, you’re reaching for the phone on the table, dialing without much thought. It rings twice before a familiar voice answers.
“Family Vi— ”
“Robin! Is Steve there? Can I talk to him?”
“Yeah, hi to you too,” She deadpans.
“Sorry. Hi. Hi Robin. Hello. Please give Steve the phone, pleaaaaaasssseeeeeee— ”
She scoffs, and you can hear the eye roll she makes, “Oh my god, shut up, shut up. I’ll get him.”
“Thank you!” You’re a little too enthusiastic in your reply. It’s quiet for a minute until you hear someone pick up the other end’s receiver.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Steve’s immediately jumping into worry mode.
“Nothing’s wrong, why would something be wrong?”
“You never call here. Just… surprised me, is all.”
“Oh… well, look, I- I just wanted to say, about the note—” ”
“Was it too much? I’m sorry if I— ”
“Steve, shut up for a minute. Please.” He pushes a soft, quiet laugh through the phone. You can picture him with his arms crossed, phone wedged between his ear and shoulder, leaning against the counter. Robin’s probably rolling her eyes. “We can… we can talk tonight. I didn’t want you to go the whole day worried about it.”
It’s silent on his end, other than distant, soft breaths. “You didn’t have to call. N- not that I don’t appreciate it! Just… y’know. I kinda have an idea of what’s coming. And it’s okay. I just want you to be—”
“Steve, I’m grateful you’re always looking out for me and my feelings, but that’s why I called. I want you to feel comfortable too, okay? Whatever works for you, works for me.”
“I— ”
“Steve, get off the phone! You can talk to your girlfriend later!”
Steve lazily covers the mic, but you can still hear him quip back, “She’s not my— whatever. Give me a minute.”
“Thirty seconds!”
“Jesus, what bug crawled up Keith’s ass?” You joke, earning a sigh from Steve.
“Definitely something annoying, like a mosquito.” He snickers back into the phone before clearing his throat. “Um… can we talk in… two hours? I can come back on my bre— ”
You cut him off anxiously. “Yes. Please. Yeah. I’d like that.”
“Okay, two hours. Yeah. Okay. See ya’ then.” Steve sounds nervous, rushing off the phone before hanging up first.
Two hours. Not that long. You should be fine.
Totally fine.
········································································
It’s been an hour, and you’re ready to move on from chewing your nails nervously, to gnawing your entire arm off.
Okay, maybe that’s a bit much. You’re still nervous as fuck, though. How can you last another hour like this?
You passed up the weed, wanting to be as sober as possible for the conversation, but you hate taking painkillers, so you keep the lights off and throw a pair of sunglasses on; the light is the worst for you with hangovers, but this barely helps.
Even worse, your head’s spinning and the constant stream of thoughts revolving around you and Steve make you dizzy. You stay in his bed, covers pulled up and blinds drawn to keep out the light, with your headphones on to block out any noise outside the apartment. They’re not even plugged into your Walkman, you’re just hoping the barrier of silence helps.
It doesn’t. You hear no sound, but your head is still pounding. Maybe you should’ve smoked after all.
The blankets are yanked back, startling you into a scream. It stops as soon as it starts when you see Steve. He’s chuckling at your reaction, and though you’re relieved to see it’s him and not some monster or masked intruder, your heart’s about to jump out of your chest.
Gently, he pulls the headphones off of you. “Sorry, honey. Uh… why are you wearing sunglasses inside?”
Every time he calls you that, or angel, you feel yourself melt. The hold this man has on you is insane.
“Hangover, lights suck, all that stuff.” You grumble, falling back onto the bed. Steve sits next to you. “I- I thought you said two hours?”
“Yeah… waiting was driving me nuts. So, I, uh, I left for the day.” He rubs the back of his neck, gaze shying away, but not before he notices you’re still wearing his shirt, and not wearing pants.
You’re shocked he pulled that off. “What’d you tell Keith to leave early?!”
“My great aunt’s in the hospital.”
You stifle a laugh, “Steve, didn’t you use that excuse a few months ago?”
His eyes grow wide. “Shit, did I?”
“Oh my god, yeah! You had me call to pretend— whatever,” You crack up, head falling back with a loud laugh. “You gotta keep track of these excuses!” You cradle your own head, wincing from the pain your own loudness brings.
“Hey, you didn’t— ” Steve’s eyes darted to the nightstand, about to tease you for not smoking yet, but you haven't touched the bottle of water either. “Jesus, no wonder your head hurts.”
“I didn’t wanna be high when we talked,” You grumble, about to lay back down, but Steve holds you upward, handing you the water. “Yeah, yeah, whatever.” You take a sip. “Happy?”
Steve lets you go, running a hand down his face with a sigh. “You’re lucky I love you.”
You’re mid-sip before choking on water, struggling through a cough to ask, “I- I- did you— what did you just say?”
“Uh… good question. You heard that? I said that? Out loud?” Steve rambles a lot, but he’s great at it when nervous. “I think you’re imagining things.”
“Would’ve worked if I was high, but nice try.”
He groans with an eye roll, flopping onto the bed, landing on his back. His hands come up to cover his face, but you pull them back.
“I didn’t want to say it like that.” His admission comes without eye contact as his face burns red. “I wasn’t gonna say it at all, honestly. I kinda figured out this is the end of things anyway.”
“Wait, what? Steve—”
“N- not that it’s a bad thing!” You haven’t let go of his hand, and he’s either completely oblivious or doesn’t want to let go. “I’m— whatever you decide, I’ll respect. We can go back to being friends, or even just… boring roommates, if you want.”
“Okay, but— ”
“And since it’s all out there— not saying this to make you feel guilty, or bad, or anything, but I- I thought these feelings were new, and it turns out I’ve felt this way about you since… probably the first week we lived here.”
Your heart aches, but in the best ways; you need to tell Steve you feel the same.
“Stevie, listen—”
“But I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. I can move out, if that’s easier.”
If only he’d shut the fuck up.
He’s getting himself worked up, and you wish he’d just take a minute to breathe. “Not, like, forcing that either, because if you just wanna be friends still, I- I’d be more than happy… and lucky to have you in my life still. But that’s- it’s— I’m not trying to—”
You’re growing agitated, wishing he’d give himself some grace. “Steve, take a second to— ”
“And I mean what I said last night, I’m so sorry for hurting you. I thought maybe it’d help distract me, but it just hurt you instead… I just fucked everything up—”
“Oh, for the love of— ” You swing a leg over his lap to straddle him, throwing your sunglasses off in the process. Leaning down, tone dripping with adoration, you murmur, “Steve, shut up.”
You kiss him, hoping this pauses the overthinking. He’s stunned, expecting anything but this. The two of you have kissed plenty of times by now, but this one is everything to him.
Finally, Steve kisses back, earning a smile from you against his lips. You cradle his face in your hands as you feel his run along your back, holding you against him as any uncertainty floats away. Breaking the kiss, you don’t pull away, just admit softly against his lips, “I love you, too.”
He sits up, leaning back on his arms with eyes wide in disbelief, “You- are you- you mean it?”
“Of course I do. I wouldn’t suffer through a hangover for just anyone, you know. I wish it didn’t take the whole battery incident— ”
“You mean vibrator incident—”
“Oh, will you shut— it’s all the same! Anyway,” You giggle, a sound Steve adores, one that pulls a smile across his face every time he hears you. “That’s when I realized I had feelings for you. A- and you coming out just to make me feel better about coming out, that really woke me up… and, uh, do not let this get to your big head—”
“My head is not big!”
You narrow your stare, shutting him up. “… When I saw you with someone else, and it made me so jealous, I’ve never felt that with anyone before. I didn’t think it was love until you came looking for my dumb, drunk ass on the street.”
“Someone had to, you were on your way to fucking Canada if you kept walking in that direction.” Steve snickers, but kisses your cheek, softening the blow. You can’t help huffing out a laugh with him; honestly, he had every right to poke fun at your little stunt.
Your voice falls quiet, turns small, “I’m sorry I never said anything earlier, and that I kept pushing that ‘just friends’ bullshit.”
“Hey, if it makes you feel any better,” Steve tries steering you away from taking the blame, “You’re a way better kisser than they were.”
You snort, “You’re just saying that.” It doesn’t stop your skin from prickling up, or the heat that blooms across your face.
“I’m not, I promise. You weren’t kidding, they literally shoved their tongue down my throat. You running off gave me an excuse to leave, so… thanks.”
You can’t help teasing him, “What are friends for?”
Steve rolls his eyes for the millionth time before sitting up to push you back onto the bed. He climbs on top, and you tug at the ugly Family Video vest he still has on.
“Babe, get this stupid thing off,” You giggle, tugging it down his arms. He pouts.
“What? You’re not into it? I thought it was kinda sexy,” His brows wiggle with his joke, and you throw it onto the floor, glaring at him. “What if I wore that, and nothing else? Just the vest.”
You’re pulling his shirt off, throwing that to the floor, too. “Then I’d definitely kick you out.”
Steve leans down to you, murmuring, “You’d never.” His lips brush against your jaw, kissing along your face to reach your neck.
“You’re right, but— ” Your breath hitches, holding your words back as he continues to kiss down your neck. “—w-we definitely wouldn’t fuck for a long time.”
“Now that’s a threat I take seriously,” His words against your skin vibrate and tickle, sending shivers up your spine. Then, he stops, and sits back up.
“What’s wrong? What’d I do?” You instantly cringe at how pathetic you sound, but Steve doesn’t tease you for it, just kisses your forehead quickly before leaning over you.
“Sit up,” Confused, you listen as he takes all the pillows around you, cushioning and covering the headboard. As he comes back to you, he pushes you back softly. “Okay— ”
Now it clicks. “Oh my god, I’m not gonna hit my head this time, I swear!”
He smirks, “Better safe than sorry.” Stealing your chance to quip back, his lips are back on yours, and it’s the kind of tender kiss where he likes to draw it out, take his time. The kind that only makes you squirm from the start.
“Hey, what’s got you so worked up?” Steve pulls back, resting his hand on your face; he can feel the goosebumps on your face prickle up against his palm. His touch is warm, soothing, and easy to gravitate to; you’re certainly not immune to leaning into his hand whenever he does this.
“Need you, Steve,” You breathe, legs closing underneath him to try and subside the ache between your legs.
“I wish I had a dollar for every time you’ve said that,” He teases, pushing your legs apart, fixated on the damp patch on the fabric between your legs. You whine, rolling your hips against nothing, only showing how needy you are. “‘Cause if I did, I’d have enough to get you a new vibrator.”
You feign offense with a loud gasp, “I thought you said I wouldn’t need it anymore, ‘cause I have you instead.”
Steve doesn’t respond, just hooks his fingers under your waistband, pulling your panties down. His hands run up your legs, pinning you to the bed as he reaches your hips. It’s not like you were going anywhere to begin with, but the pressure and possessiveness feels… nice.
“You do have me,” The meaning behind his affirmation spreads far beyond sex. “Always.”
You reach for his pants as he leans over you again, “Don’t have you in me yet, though,” You grumble, hands fumbling with his belt buckle. Steve stifles a laugh while you struggle. “Who designed this fuckin’ thing anyway?”
“I thought we were having a sweet moment, but your sailor mouth’s ruining it,” His joke doesn’t make you laugh like he hoped. Instead, you just look frustrated, finally loosening his belt. “Whoa, hey— honey, look at me.”
A sharp exhale escapes your lips while you glance up at Steve, but only for a moment before staring off, “M’sorry.”
“We don’t have to do this, you know that, right?” A finger slips under your chin, gently tilting your face up towards his. Your eyes meet his again, and he gives you the same soft, caring look he gave you a few nights ago. “I’m perfectly content with just hanging out the rest of the day, doing whatever you want.”
“I want to, I really do, I just… ” You try forcing your voice to come out stronger, more certain, but it just cracks as you admit, “I think I’m scared it’ll end so fast.”
Steve thinks back to the first time the two of you kissed, the first time you were fully exposed to him, the first time he went down on you— the first time anyone went down on you, how disappointed you sounded when it was almost over. He remembers telling you it could happen again, that it didn’t have to be a one time thing.
He remembers the way you hit your head against the wall, again, the first time the two of you fucked, and how he told you next time it’d be in a bed, helping you laugh off the clumsiness. You sounded so surprised that you even talked about the possibility of a ‘next time’.
Almost every time after either of you initiated anything sexual, your reaction was always shock and surprise when Steve talked about fucking around again in the future. There were more times where you begged him to not let it end yet, but he thought it was just in the moment.
Steve didn’t realize you meant you didn’t want things between the two of you to end. It wasn’t ever really in the moment. It was a fear you’ve had since the first time he’s touched you, and it’s a fear of Steve’s, too.
“Angel, I’m not going anywhere,” You move up against the pillows as he speaks softly to you, shifting with you to keep you comfortable while staying close. “I can’t speak for you, but on my end, I don’t plan on ending this fast. Or ever… but that- that’s another conversation for another day, okay?”
You nod, slipping your hand into his, “Okay.”
“Point is, this isn’t a one time thing. You really do have me. And when I say always, I mean it.”
There’s no hesitation in your response, “You have me, too, Steve. Always.”
“Let me take care of you,” His hand is cupping your face again, thumb sweeping along your cheek softly. “Get those awful thoughts out of that pretty head of yours. How’s that sound?”
You nod against his palm, hands coming up to hold his forearm as he holds you. “Please, Stevie.” Your eyes fall to his belt before reaching for it. You pull it off, adding it to the pile of his clothes. “That thing is the worst.”
“Won’t wear that one around you anymore, promise,” Steve chuckles as the two of you strip each other from any remaining clothing.
His lips find their way back to your neck, picking up where he left off with the gentle kisses. Your hands wander his body, tracing along the dips and curves of his toned arms. It’s easy to lose yourself in the scattered freckles and moles all over, making up constellations, a galaxy of his own. What brings you back is the breathy moan made from his touch along your folds.
It’s one finger, then two, and you’re arching your back, pressing yourself against him, dizzy from shallow breaths as he finds your sweet spot. His long fingers have no problem reaching where you need him most, not struggling the way you do when you touch yourself.
Steve starts kissing down your body, but you grab him by the shoulders. “You okay?”
“Stay with me,” You gasp as he continues fucking you on his fingers. “I- I don’t— it feels good, but I wanna cum with you instead.”
A blush creeps along Steve’s face as a lazy smile curls up. He makes his way back to you, retracing his kisses with new ones, of course. When he rests his forehead against yours, his hand’s still between your legs.
“Still wanna make y’feel good first,” Steve’s thumb softly swipes over your clit while he continues working his fingers, curling them just right. “You can cum twice, you’ve done it before.”
Your fingers twist through his hair, bringing him towards you as you close the gap, trying to kiss him the way he was kissing you. Your hips roll onto his fingers, feeling your legs shake and your walls constrict around him.
Steve pulls back, admiring the way your face twists in an expression of beautiful agony, so, so close to the edge. He leans down to murmur into your ear, “That’s it, angel, let go for me”. Other praises follow, but you’re just at the point of no return, unable to hear him as you finally reach your high, a strangled moan slipping between your lips with ease.
Aftershocks roll through your body while you pant shallow breaths, vision a little fuzzy from your eyes squeezing shut, and Steve kissing your temple, then your cheek, with more gentle praises, ones you can faintly make out.
You’re barely settled, still in the comedown, but you’re pulling Steve closer, “Fuck, I love you.” He beams, knowing already he’ll never get tired of hearing that from you.
He spreads your legs, but stops to study your expression. Checking on you, he asks, “Are you sure you can handle one more?”
“Uh-huh,” You try to giggle, still breathless as you nod. “As long as it’s with you.”
Steve rolls his eyes, but you know him, he loves the corny little remarks you shoot back and forth. You know him. You know him so well by now, because he’s yours. And you’re his.
“Hey, angel?” He’s admiring your figure, still catching your breath, already blissed out with hooded eyes, and the sweetest smile he’s ever seen on your face. He lines up with your entrance, slowly pushing in while he leans back down to you with a lingering forehead kiss.
“Y- yeah?” You shudder out, adjusting to him all over again. His hand slips into yours, fingers lacing together before he gives a gentle squeeze.
“I love you, too.”
The first night you had together, when Steve offered to help, it wasn’t meant to just be a one and done kind of fling. Maybe it felt like it back then, and maybe even last night, while the two of you fought over your feelings, it felt like it should’ve been an arrangement that ended long ago. But now? Now, everything’s so sure. Everything’s so certain.
With Steve, everything’s crystal clear.
It only takes the first thrust for the two of you to meld together with ease. It’s almost effortless, the way you and Steve can flow into and with one another. You’ve never felt like this with anyone else, never felt so comfortable, so at home within someone’s embrace, never felt such safety to be yourself completely.
At the same time, both you and Steve give each other the same, cheesy line, “feels like you’re made for me.” While neither of your movements stop, the two of you burst into a fit of laughter. Steve buries his head into your shoulder, while his shoulders shake along with the noise. Your arms wrap around him, laughing even harder when he realizes he can feel you laugh while deep in you.
“Hey- h- hey wait, waitwaitwait!” He can’t control his laughter, and neither can you. “Every time you do that it— fuck!” He’s trying his hardest to calm down, hoping you can, too. “You gotta stop doing that, I can- you- fuck, you’re so tight.”
You cover your face with your hands, trying to kill your giggles, and slowly it works, leading Steve to calm down, too. With a quick kiss to his chin as he lifts his head, you flip on top, riding him immediately.
Any laughter still at the back of Steve’s throat dies instantly as you grind down onto him. You finally find a steady, slow pace to roll your hips; there’s no rush, there’s no fear it’ll all disappear when the two of you finish. It’s just you and Steve, nothing else, no one else.
No distractions or kinks or secrets, just the two of you, together.
“Honey, m’not gonna last if you k- keep this up,” he breathes, strong hands on your hips, gently guiding you along.
“S’okay, I- I’m close,” You whimper, hand splayed against Steve’s chest. “A- and we can just— ” You sharply gasp, walls constricting around him. “we got all the time in the world, Stevie. You have me, always.” Your head tilts back as pleasure consumes you both, feeling him throb while your legs shake.
Before the two of you reach that sweet high together, you faintly hear Steve respond, “Y’have me, too, angel. Always.”
#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x fem!reader#steve harrington smut#my fics#crystal clear#*slaps post* this baby can fit SOOOOOOO much angst in it
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➶-͙˚ ༘✶ 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙁*𝘾𝙆 𝙇𝙄𝙎𝙏
✧.* CHAPTER 15 || The New Information
[ { SYPNOSIS } ] ➤ A tale in which Gojo Satoru blackmails you into seducing a list of people to clear his debt. Sounds easy enough, right?
[ { CHAPTER CONTENT } ] ➤ language, a bit of angst, and fluff.
[ { WORD COUNT } ] ➤ 4.2k
[ { PAIRINGS } ] ➤ jjk men x f!reader. gojo x f!reader. geto x f!reader. toji x f!reader. choso x f!reader. sukuna x f!reader. nanami x f!reader.
[ [ chapters mlist } ]
——"PLEASE GO AWAY," YOU SIGHED desperately in response to the man behind you as if your words would make him disappear.
That laugh of his you once found pleasant but now find annoying is heard. "Relax, sweets. I'm not here to bother you." Gojo hums.
You don't turn around to face him just yet, "Is Shoko here?"
"Nope." He replies simply.
Your brows furrow, "Then how'd you get in?"
"You should really check your text messages, love."
There's a pang in your chest at the sound of that specific pet name. "Don't call me that." You say through slightly gritted teeth.
Gojo scoffs, "Why?"
"Cause' you don't mean it." You explain simply, "You're just saying shit just to say it and it's baseless, it's fake."
"It's not, actually." He argues.
"Whatever. Why are you here?"
He diverts, "Was that Choso I just saw?"
"None of your business." You tell him. "Why are you here?"
"It actually is my business since you wouldn't even know the guy without me," Gojo argues.
You scoff, annoyance is stirring within you. "I might've."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," You whisper, your voice solemn. "I might've even had a chance with him..."
"You wanted one?" He scoffs again, "Seriously?"
"Yes Gojo, yes I did."
"Well he's still on the list so you can-"
"No, I can't." You cut off, "I can't get with him Gojo, you know that."
"What's stopping you from getting with him?" He asks in a confused manner.
You think you lose it after he asks such a stupid question. You slowly turn around to face the man and see him standing in front of your room, resting against the doorframe.
"Don't ask me stupid questions like that. Why are you here?" You voice out sternly.
It's clear that you're both tired and upset and Gojo even notices the way you're leaning back against the door to hold yourself up.
He raises an eyebrow, "Did you and him just..." Both of his eyebrows then raise as he makes his own assumptions. "Damn, three in one day? Are you becoming a whore?" Gojo gasps dramatically.
Your face twists up and you scowl, "What?"
"I mean, first you sucked Suguru off in his car, then you went and got pounded by Mr. Fushiguro, and then you somehow made time to sleep with Choso as well?" He assumes, "Shit, I'm impressed."
"What the hell? No, that's not what happened."
"So... why're your legs shaking so much?" Gojo asks with a concerned tilt of his head.
You glance down at yourself and then scoff. "Mr. Fushiguro has a big dick, that's why."
"Uhuh..." Gojo hums, unamused.
You then look back up to him. "And how did you know about me and Suguru...?"
"He told me."
"Of course he did."
Gojo shakes his head, "Y'know, if I keep paying you for every time you sleep with him, I'm gonna go broke."
"Not my problem."
"But it literally is."
"Where do you get all this money from anyways?"
"I have my sources." Gojo shrugs.
You blink. "Okay... Well, you agreed to pay me, so-"
"I didn't agree to you becoming a whore." Gojo claims. You can tell there's something about the whole thing that's bothering him.
"That's what I've been from the start though," You snap back, "Isn't it?"
He pauses. Those blue eyes of his simply stare at you from across the room and you notice you've got him stuck.
After a moment of thought, he speaks again. "Maybe. But the list is different..." Gojo says.
You roll your eyes, "How?"
"You're only supposed to fuck someone and get paid once."
"If that's the case, why'd you agree on allowing me to fuck someone and get paid more than once?" You ask with an innocent tilt of your head.
There's a vein popping out along the man's jawline and his eyes are low, "Cause' I didn't think you'd turn Suguru into your little fuck buddy."
"It was his idea, y'know." You blurt out. "He's the one who suggested the whole thing."
"So?" Gojo blinks, "You're the one who keeps meeting up with him."
"I need the money." You shrug.
"Is that the only reason you keep hooking up with him?" Gojo questions, chuckling a little. His distaste is obvious and written all over his face, "Cause' you need the money??"
"Yeah." You hum.
"Liar."
"What other reason would I have?"
"You're doing it to piss me off."
You laugh at his words, finding true amusement in the way he thinks everything is about him. "Oh please. I'm sleeping with Suguru because he fucks me well and I'm getting paid for it."
Gojo shrugs, "I could do the same thing."
"Yeah, but I don't like you." You tell him for what feels like the millionth time. "Even thinking about sleeping with you again makes me wanna throw up."
His face twists up in disbelief, "Bullshit."
"It's not."
"Nobody on that list, including Suguru, can fuck you better than me."
You can't help but laugh at the man again, "Mr. Fuhsiguro just did."
"Oh really?" Gojo scoffs.
"Yeah. His dick's bigger than yours too."
"Think I care?"
"Wouldn't be standin' here right now if you didn't."
"I'm actually only here to drop that off," Gojo tells you as he nods his chin toward the nearby counter.
You glance over and spot a few racks of cash designated for you. A pleased hum leaves you before you look back over to Gojo.
An eyebrow is raised at him, "Well, you dropped it off. Shouldn't you be on your way out now?"
"I should but..." Gojo suddenly pulls something out from behind his back. It's the journal you'd been writing in. "We've gotta talk about the stupidness behind writing down the details of the list in this journal of yours." He hums.
Your eyes go wide, "What the hell? Did you go rummaging through my room??"
"Uh, no. Someone left it sitting on their nightstand."
"You'd have to look into my room to see that..."
"I saw you changed your room around and took a peek," Gojo tells you honestly as if it's no big deal.
You don't know why but the fact that he even recognized the change in your bedroom stuck you oddly. Did you like the fact that he noticed? Or did it piss you off that he looked in there to begin with? Perhaps it was a bit of both...
"Okay, stalker much?" You say with an unamused laugh. You then begin to steadily make your way toward the man, your eyes locking onto the journal held in his hands. "Also, I need that back."
Gojo laughs at you and waves the item around, "You need this back? What for? At this point, it's like you're asking for someone to find it and figure everything out."
You lean against the nearby counter and halt yourself, "I-I'm not... I just wanted to keep everything organized."
"This is by far the dumbest way to do so." He comments, pushing himself off the wall and looking down at the journal.
Gojo makes his way over to you, his tall frame standing right in front of you. Those blue eyes of his are down on you, a taunting glint evident within his gaze.
You glare up at him, annoyed by every little thing about him-- his presence, his words, his voice, his stupidly handsome face, that attractive ass smirk he has as he stares at you, and the way his closeness makes you feel all weird inside.
"Just give me the journal and leave. Please?" You request with a sigh.
Gojo puts on this little pout to mock you, "How about no?"
"I thought you said you weren't here to bother me, this is bothering me." You huff.
He chuckles, "Sweets, I'm pretty sure everything I do bothers you." He then leans down to your face, "I bother you."
Your glare is continuous, "You do."
"Exactly so, that statement I made earlier was uh... what was it you said? Oh yeah, baseless." Gojo recalls.
The smirk he has on his face fades away and he leans up from your face. He then holds the journal up, "I'll be keeping this, 'kay?"
Your brows furrow and you instantly shoot a hand up to take the item from him. Your attempt fails as the man shoots his arm further up, extending it and making the journal out of your reach. A groan leaves you before you push up on your toes and continue to reach for it.
Gojo's smirk returns within seconds as he watches you struggle. The man then draws his arm back and you push yourself forward, nearly grabbing ahold of the journal.
Sadly, instead of grabbing it, your wobbly legs only cause you to fumble right into Gojo's chest and knock the two of you over and onto the floor with a thud.
You both groan in unison as you land on top of him, your face smushed against his chest. Gojo's quiet for a second and the two of you remain still for a long moment. He then snickers quietly and you lift your head and scowl at him.
"Fuck, don't look at me like that sweetheart. You're the one who jumped into me." Gojo teases.
You grit your teeth and push yourself up slightly, propping your upper half up with your arms and leaving your legs spread over his crotch. You spot the book loosely placed in his hand and move to grab it.
Gojo's got a steel grip on the item so as you try to take it out of his grasp, your body leans over him and your chest is right in his face while you try taking the journal from him.
You can hear him chuckling at the way you struggle, "Are you doing this on purpose?" Gojo asks.
You blink and look down at him, noticing the way your breasts are all above his face, "N-No." You hum.
The sudden feeling of his slim hands at your waist makes you flinch, "I mean, I'm not complaining... You should stay like this, actually."
For a moment, you almost let yourself get distracted. With his hands on your waist, you realize the journal is no longer in his grasp so you pick the item up off the floor.
"Idiot." You comment snarkily.
Gojo raises a brow before griping onto you tightly and abruptly flipping the two of you over, his larger body looming over yours. As you find yourself laid out on the floor, you keep the book held within your hand as tightly as you can.
You thought that would help you but with the way Gojo's legs were in between your own and the way his hands fly from your waist to your wrists, you steadily realize you have little to no control.
His fingers curl around your wrists and the man tilts his head at you, "C'mon, sweets, you didn't seriously think I was gonna let you take the journal from me that easily?"
You grimace, "Stop it with the pet name."
Gojo leans down to your face, his lips ghosting your own, "Or what?"
You grit your teeth again and stay quiet. What can you say to that when he's over your body like this? Part of you wanted to scream or spit on the man. You think your hatred for Gojo Satoru was at an alarming all-time high and you could feel your anger boiling in your veins.
Quietly, you look directly into his eyes and whisper back a simple, "I hate you so much."
Gojo pulls his face away slightly, "Do you?"
"I do." You hum, "I don't know how many times I have to say it for you to get it through that thick ass skull of yours but-"
Gojo puts a hand over your mouth and you think your eye twitches. "Nah, I get it... I just don't believe you." He whispers and you watch the way his expression sinks again, his eyes saddened.
And god do you hate the way your heart throbs at his stupidly solemn expression. He steadily takes his hand off your mouth and your wrist, sitting up and still hovering over you. He's quick to take the journal from you as he does so.
You'd yet to give up on getting that book back from him so the moment he sits up, you sit up too and push him right back down-- crawling over him, grabbing both of his arms and crossing them over his head while pinning his wrists down and snatching up the journal in one swift motion.
You now sit comfortably on his crotch, pinning his arms down with all of your strength and holding the journal up and far away from him. "Bitch." You utter to him, semi-playfully.
You do not imagine the throb of his cock beneath you in reaction and you scoff at him.
"Holy fuck," A mocking smirk spreads across your face, "You like that shit?"
"The hell are you talking about?" Gojo snaps back.
"Being degraded." You clarify, "You're into that, aren't you?"
"What? No." Gojo lies.
The way you start laughing at him makes his heart throb. "Gojo, I just felt you."
"Felt me what?" He responds plainly through slightly gritted teeth.
"Twitch, idiot."
"I didn't-"
"Yeah, you did." You cut off, smiling teasingly at the man, "You got turned on by me calling you a bitch."
"N-No, I didn't." He stammers.
"Yes, you did!" You say enthusiastically, chuckling afterward as you truly find it humorous. "Fuck, is that what you wanna be Gojo? Hm?" You tease, leaning down to him slightly and whispering, "Wanna be my little bitch?"
You're not sure what came over you all of a sudden since you weren't interested in sleeping with him or providing him any sort of pleasure but... Something about the situation was just oh so amusing to you.
Again, Gojo's cock twitches beneath you and the male feels the slight stiffening in his length. "Fuck you." He curses.
"You want to so badly, don't you?" You say cooingly. "That's why you're really here, right? You're mad that I've been fucking Suguru and not you."
"Tch. No, I'm not. I don't care how many times you fuck him as long as it doesn't cost me every single time." He hums.
You tilt your head, "Really, so knowing that me and Suguru fuck pretty often doesn't bother you?"
"Do you want it to?" Gojo says in full seriousness, the look in his eyes dark.
"What? No." You reply.
"Okay, then stop telling me about it."
"Or what? You'll get pissed off?"
"Yeah, actually."
"Why?"
"Because I..." The man shuts his mouth and turns his head to the side.
You blink, "Because you what, Gojo?"
"Never mind. Get off me." He diverts.
"Make me."
His eyes shift over to you, "We both know I could if I wanted to. I'm being civil right now so, please get off me."
You glare at him a little longer and he slowly turns his head to you. Gojo's gaze on you is a mix of possessiveness and anger. The man looks at you like you belong to him and yet something's bothering him at the same time. Meanwhile, your look down at him is filled with nothing but pure distaste.
The man utters your name for the first time in a while, his voice low and tone deep. "You're not moving... Why?" He asks.
You swallow, unsure of the reasoning behind your still state.
Gojo raises a brow, "Do you..." He scoffs, "Do you need help standing...?"
A flushed and embarrassed warmth spreads across your face as you look off to the side.
"Awww, Mr. Fushiguro really did a number on ya', didn't he?" Gojo teases.
"You're so annoying."
"I'm aware. But, y'know... you'll have to let my wrists go if you want me to help you up." He says.
You shake your head, "Do you think I'm dumb? As soon as I let your wrists go, you're just gonna take the journal from me."
"I am. But that's only because if you keep it, someone's gonna find out."
"Not everyone is nosy like you, Gojo."
"You'd be surprised." He fires back.
You open your mouth to say something else but the sound of your apartment door opening makes both of you go rigid as if you'd been caught doing something you weren't supposed to.
You look up and Gojo angles his head so that he too can see who just came in. To no surprise, Shoko Ieiri enters the apartment with raised eyebrows at the odd sight of you on top of Gojo pinning his wrists down.
"Oh... that's not..." Shoko chuckles lightly, trailing off as she closes the door behind her and stares at the two of you on the floor.
You and Gojo speak in sync. "It's not what it looks like."
Shoko blinks, "Right... sure it isn't... I mean, if I'm interrupting something, I can just leave and come back another time-"
"N-No," You hum, releasing Gojo's wrists and sitting up properly, still on his crotch. "You're not interrupting anything, I just uh... fell."
Gojo moves his hands to your thighs and squeezes them, "Fell into the perfect position, honestly. Shoko you walked in at a bad time, we were totally about to fu-"
"No, we weren't." You cut off, sending him a quick glare.
Shoko giggles at the banter between you two. "Am I missing something? Are you two dating?"
"No." You answer before Gojo gets the chance to.
She raises a brow at you, "Are you suuure?"
"Positive." You say firmly.
She folds her arms and gives you a skeptical look, "I dunno roomie, when I walked in it looked like you guys were two seconds away from fucking on the floor-"
"We weren't! I swear." You say assuringly.
"Yeah?" Shoko teases, "Then, why're you still on top of him?"
You freeze. There isn't really a good way for you to explain that a professor fucked your brains out before you came home and then you fell on top of Gojo and now you can't stand without help...
"Uhh.." You trail off.
"She's keepin' my cock warm right now." Gojo blurts out spontaneously.
Shoko scrunches up her face, "Gross, are you two actually-"
"Oh my god! No!" You huff, looking down to Gojo, "I'm gonna hurt you."
He bites his lip, "Are you now?"
"You fucking freak..." You whisper, your words only catching his ears.
Gojo then sits up with you shifting into his lap before his hands go to your waist. "You're lucky Shoko's your roommate." He whispers back to you before helping you stand up.
The two of you soon make your way up off the floor and Gojo makes sure to stand slightly in front of you to hide the way your legs are still shaking slightly. The shake wasn't exactly noticeable unless you started walking but it seems like Gojo still wanted to hide it from Shoko anyway.
"So," Shoko hums, again narrowing her eyes at the two of you. "I let you borrow our spare key for one day and you come in bothering my roommate...?" She says playfully, her words directed toward Gojo.
His eyes widen, "I wasn't bothering her!"
"Bullshit," You murmur.
Gojo scoffs at you in response before directing his words to Shoko again, "Anyways, I was just about to leave."
"Were you?" Shoko asks, clearly unconvinced.
The man in front of you nods his head and then glances behind himself and to you, "Don't miss me too much, sweets." He uttered casually with a wink.
You don't respond to him with anything more than your usual glare. With a dramatic sigh at your lack of a reply, Gojo shrugs and heads toward the front door, passing Shoko and teasingly sticking his tongue out at her.
Shoko chuckles at the man before he leaves and she shuts the door behind him.
With a giddy grin on her face, she does this dramatic slow turn around to look at you. "Soooo, are you gonna tell me what's really going on between the two of you."
You're quick to freeze, having quickly tossed all the cash Gojo left on the counter and your journal into your room before Shoko turned around. Now you stand at your bedroom door, your back to the woman and your eyes widened.
"Nothing's going on between us," You hum, tuning your head back to her.
She visibly doesn't believe you. "Are you suuuure?"
You blink, "Shoko... do you want there to be something between me and Gojo?"
The woman scoffs at your words, "You even talk like him now, holy shit. How long have you guys been fooling around?"
"We're not fooling around at all." You sigh.
She folds her arms, "Y'know, you are a shitty liar, sweets." She comments on purpose, having heard the way Gojo used the pet name toward you.
You swallow, "Please don't start..."
Shoko starts walking toward you slowly, "C'monnnn, how long have you guys been fucking?"
You freeze, "H-Huh? What makes you think we're-"
"It's kinda obvious. Just be honest with me." She says sweetly.
"We... We slept together once, Shoko. One time." You tell her, making sure to be very clear with how many times you've been with Gojo.
A smile spreads across her face, "Aww, really?"
"Yeah, why do you look so happy about this??"
"Cause' that idiot does nothing but gush about you and I'm happy to hear he finally got what he wanted." She says with a sigh as she turns to head toward her room.
"He... He gushes about me?" You question softly, turning your body to follow the direction she's going.
You don't know why you're so intrigued by Gojo gushing about you but your curiosity is oddly high.
"Hm?" Shoko pauses and looks at you, "Oh, yeah, all the time."
It would've been nice to know that before the list... "Why didn't you tell me?" You ask.
"Cause' I refuse to give Gojo the easy way out. If he likes you as much as he claims to, he should be able to talk to you himself." She explains, "Instead, the dumbass said something about being scared of women."
"Seriously?"
"Mhm. Like I said, he's an idiot." She shrugs.
A slow nod of your head is given to her, "Right..." You still don't know why but, your curiosity is eating at you now, "So, wait, does he like like me?"
"Like like, as in, does he have a crush on you?" She asks for clarification.
You nod.
"Nah," Shoko responds simply.
The odd well of anticipation you had sunk instantly, "Oh-"
"I'm pretty sure he's like, in love with you," She suddenly blurts out, looking off to the side in thought. She then chuckles as she recalls something, "Yeah, I think it's way more than a crush."
"You're joking right?" You breathe out.
"Nope!" She says enthusiastically. "If you ask him at the right time, and actually give him a chance, I guarantee you he'll confess."
Okay, you'll give Shoko the benefit of the doubt since she doesn't know what you do. She's not privy to the fact that Gojo's selfishly blackmailing you to fuck a list of people. But even so, you can't help but wonder what makes her come to such a conclusion.
For Gojo to be in love with you, he has the worst way of showing it.
Shoko's words only make you scoff and shake your head, "I'll uh, I'll ask him about it one day."
"Oh my god, so you're gonna give him a chance?!" She asks excitedly.
"Uh, no. there's..." You look off to the side, "Someone else I think I have feelings for."
"Ouu, who is it?" Shoko hums, her brows raising.
"Uh, I'll tell you about him another day..."
She chuckles, "Promise?"
"Pinky." You grin.
Both of your pinkys rise to the air and from a distance you pretend to lock your fingers to seal the little promise you just made. The two of you then dip off into your perspective spaces and you're left with your thoughts.
Gojo in love with you? Please. That's the most ridiculous thing you've heard all week. Why would Shoko say such a thing? Aside from today, this was her first time even seeing the two of you interact with one another...
It's odd to you how she could've come to such a conclusion. Maybe there are things she and Gojo have talked about regarding you before you and Gojo started talking. Maybe there's a lot about the guy you don't actually know...
Fuck, why are you thinking about this anyways? Who cares? His being in love with you obviously isn't going to change the situation he's put you in so there's no point in pondering over it.
Instead, you'll refocus yourself on what's really important; Choso Kamo.
He's the guy you want next. Though, you hope the bubbling feelings in your chest won't get in the way of you trying to have sex with him. And even more, you desperately hope that he doesn't have feelings for you.
At least, not yet.
Feelings will bring nothing but complications into the whole thing and you want to avoid them as much as you can. Only until the list is over. Then, you'll move to pursue a relationship with Choso.
Yeah, that sounds like the plan.
What could go wrong?
GOJO SATORU ✔︎
GETO SUGURU ✔︎
TOJI FUSHIGURO ✔︎
KAMO CHOSO ☐
NANAMI KENTO ☐
??? SUKUNA ☐
??? NAOYA ☐
mlist || previous chapt || next chpt
#the f*ck list#the fuck list#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#gojo x reader#choso x reader#toji x reader#nanami x reader#sukuna x reader#naoya x reader#geto x reader#gojo satoru x reader#geto suguru x reader#toji fushiguro x reader#sukuna ryomen x reader#nanami kento x reader#choso kamo x reader#kamiverse#kamiversee#smut fic#jjk smut#gojo smut#geto smut#choso smut#toji smut
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- just don’t want your friends to see -
prompt: “said you needed me, wanted to be with me, just don’t want your friends to see”
pairing: lando norris x reader
summary: the pressure of keeping the relationship a secret is getting to you both. is he ashamed of you? (everyone needs a little soft and reassuring lando in their lives every now and then)
a/n: can be considered a lil’ part two to told her you were just a friend. lyrics from ‘you to you’ by maisie peters :)
masterlist | the spotify wrapped collection
“hey, you guys, hope you haven’t been waiting long!”
your head turned to follow the sound of the voice, seeing max and his girlfriend pietra approaching, a few minutes late for lunch. you noticed lando doing the same, his fingers immediately disentangling from your own as soon as he spotted them, your hand feeling empty without his clasped around it as he took a step away from you. you knew you should be used to it by now, you’d both agreed that this was for the best, keeping your relationship in the shadows, locked behind closed doors. I want this relationship to be just ours, he’d said. it had sounded nice at the time, poetic, even, and you’d agreed, maybe a little too eagerly. but as you sat at lunch with max and pietra, perched awkwardly on the edge of your seat so as not to seem too close to lando, listening to him laugh off questions about his romantic life and saying he hadn’t really met anyone special yet - you had to admit that it stung. it stung the same way it did every time, and you found yourself unnaturally quiet throughout the meal, eyes flicking between person to person as the conversation continued around you.
if you’d thought it had gone unnoticed by lando, you thought wrong.
“baby, everything okay?”
even the pet name stung, the façade of ‘friendship’ falling by the wayside as soon as you made it back to lando’s apartment. just the two of you, a safe space, away from prying eyes and listening ears. you could be in a relationship again, having put it on pause for the time you were out in public.
you looked up, trying to plaster a fake smile across your face, the expression faltering slightly at the edges.
“yeah, fine. just tired, that’s all.” came your reply. but lando wasn’t stupid, and he wasn’t blind, either. you tried to escape through to the kitchen, but he wasn’t having any of that.
“y/n, I know you. I can tell you’re not fine. talk to me, please.”
the gentleness of his voice coaxed you to be honest, letting out a sigh as you turned to lean against the kitchen counter, facing him. you couldn’t quite meet his eyes, almost embarrassed. you’d both agreed on this - why were you suddenly feeling so upset about it all? you knew lando loved you, appreciated you, but something about the way he acted when the two of you were out in public, around colleagues, around friends, even, that just got to you.
“are you embarrassed of me?”
the words left your mouth before filtering through your brain first, and you regretted them immediately; the way lando’s face fell, pain and guilt etched across his features - you swore you would never forget it, and you never wanted to see it again.
“no, no. fuck, y/n, I could never be embarrassed of you.” his voice was strained as he took several paces towards you across the kitchen, casting a cautious gaze over you as he tried to decide whether to give you space or comfort. you felt emotions bubble up inside you, ones you’d been trying to keep hidden for months, for the sake of your relationship. you’d always worried that if you caused a fuss or spoke about your emotions in any way, it would push lando away. why would he want someone who was such a problem when he could have pretty much anyone he wanted? it was irrational and you knew it, but keeping it inside for so long, unable to talk to anyone about it…? well, it had festered in your mind until it had taken over.
“I just feel like that’s why you don’t wanna tell your friends about me…” you eventually said, voice coming out as more of a whimper than you’d intended. lando closed the remaining space between you, hesitating for split second before taking your hands in his, his eyes searching yours imploringly.
“baby, I’m sorry if I’ve ever made you feel like that.” his voice was firm, filled with conviction and sincerity, but also tinged with a hint of emotion, upset that he’d ever hurt the person in his life that he cared the most about, “I swear, I never meant to. I’m so sorry.”
“it’s just difficult.” you murmured in reply, relishing the feeling of your hands being in his once again as you dropped your gaze down to look at them. “I feel like I’m always acting in public, like I can’t relax. and I can’t even talk to anyone about it.”
“I wish you’d talk to me.” lando’s voice was equally as quiet as yours, his tone so genuine that you couldn’t help but relax just a little, fears of pushing him away by being too honest dissipating by the second. he reached a hand up to cup your cheek, and it was only when he brushed a thumb across your skin to wipe away a tear that you realised you’d started crying.
“really?” you blinked up at him with wide, watery eyes. “I thought you wouldn’t wanna hear about it.”
he took your face in both hands, eyebrows curved up into a soft frown. “why would you think that? is it… is it something I said? something I did?” you could tell he meant it genuinely, but it made you realise just how irrational you were being. nothing lando had ever said or done had given you any indication that he wouldn’t want to hear your thoughts, your concerns, the things that made you upset. you were still navigating things, but you were beginning to realise that this was someone who you could really open up to. someone who cared about you. you shook your head, brushing away your own tears with the palm of your hand, letting out a wet chuckle.
“no, no. you didn’t do anything wrong. I was just being stupid.” you admitted, but now it was lando’s turn to shake his head.
“you weren’t being stupid.” he murmured, dropping his hands from your face and instead wrapping them around your waist, drawing you into his chest as he placed delicate kisses to the top of your head. “nothing you feel is stupid. it’s not easy keeping us a secret, trust me, I know.” he sighed, resting his chin on your head as he held you close. “I’m not embarrassed of you, y/n, I’m just trying to protect you. people… they can be pretty crazy when it comes to people I date. I just wanna keep you away from that just a little longer.”
you nodded into his chest. deep down, you knew that. you just needed to hear it from him. you let out a soft, contented sigh, the sound mirrored by lando as he tightened his grip round you just a little. he didn’t want to lose you, especially not over something like this, a fact he told his mum on the phone later that night as he finally told her all about you.
the final part is out now :)
a smau based on this fic is out now :)
#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x you#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 x y/n#f1 fic#f1 imagine
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Hi I was wondering if you wrote or if you will write a part 2 to neighbour Ellie x reader, cause I would love to see how their relationship will progress and maybe there can be a bit of jealous Ellie and insecure reader, in like maybe they meet their exes or something like that
neighbor!ellie x sunshine!fem reader, hurt + comfort / fluff / smut MDNI!! or we’re beefing!! / established relationship, wc: 5.2k
synopsis: things between you and ellie seem to be going great! that is until you pay her a visit at work to drop off lunch and find that the threads that tie her and an overfriendly coworker tangle too much for your liking.
content warnings: language, slightly mean!ellie makes a return, reader isn’t necessarily insecure, but a little unsure of the circumstances, 18 + content / filthy make-up sex that consists of: brief shower-sex, scissoring, fingering / oral (reader & ellie!receiving), thigh-riding, so much kissing and mushy feelings.
author’s note: in love with this idea ! been mulling over how to expand on their relationship & i feel like this is a great segue ! hcs below; leave some more scenarios for existing couples (emt!abby, collegebff!ellie or others) and i’ll answer them ! (also not proofread well like usual lmao)
main masterlist | tlou masterlist
jealous!ellie & jealous!reader are SO different, but i feel like the outcome would be so…YUM.
feel like you’d be more reserved about being jealous.
like lately, it seems like things between you and ellie seem like they can’t get any better.
the two of you spend so much time together, whether it’s having picnics in the park with some pastries you make, testing out recipes after close at your cafe or having sleepovers at one or the other’s apartment.
ellie’s lowkey obsessed with you and at times it makes you blush because after the initial stages of feeling your relationship out, you find that ellie’s extremely vocal and outright with her affection for you.
and for the longest time, you don’t question it. don’t really say much because ellie’s particularly good at reassuring you even if you don’t ask.
it’s why you think you’re overreacting when you decide to surprise her and bring her lunch on a random afternoon in the middle of the week.
the top half of her coveralls hangs around her hips, dirtied white tank exposing tanned, inked flesh and lean muscle when you enter the lobby.
she’s leaning against one of the tool carts with her arms crossed over her chest, gaze unwavering.
when you trace her eyeline, you realize there’s another girl nearby bent under the hood of a shiny red car.
she says something imperceptible and suddenly ellie’s throwing her head back with a laugh, sound muffled by the sliding plexiglass.
“hey, receptionist is on break, can i help you with something?” a mechanic is poking his head into the lobby from an adjoining office.
“uh, i’m here for ellie?” the mechanic’s glancing through the glass into the main garage before standing from his rolling chair to dust his hands on his coveralls.
“yeah, she’s supposed to be watching the front,” he laughs. “too busy flirting with her lil girlfriend to pay attention.”
he doesn’t notice the way your face falls or how you almost drop the little canvas bag altogether.
you chance another glance at the two, find that the girl has emerged from under the hood and you swallow hard because god, she’s so fucking pretty.
doesn’t help that seeing her and ellie side-by-side makes you wonder if the two of you look that good together.
they look like they were made for each other and they even share similar interests! you don’t know a damned thing about cars and ellie’s gaze nearly glazes over every time you’re talking about your recipes and coffee pairings.
“uh, actually,” you stop him. “i don’t think she was expecting me, so i’ll just drop this off.”
he pauses.
“you sure? i can get her real quick, she’s not busy.”
ellie still hasn’t clocked you, so you shake your head.
“it’s fine,” you assure him. “i’ll talk to her later.”
he merely shrugs, meets you halfway for the canvas bag, and you’re quickly ducking out of the garage.
“babe?”
ellie’s right on the dot, you realize, when you hear her through the cracked sliding door to the balcony.
you’ve just finished watering your plants and now you’re jotting down a quick brainstorm for the upcoming spring launch.
through the window, you see ellie kicking her shoes off at the entrance before assessing her surroundings and poking her head into your bedroom for good measure.
“babe?” she calls out.
you stand, tucking the little notebook under your arm before sliding back inside.
she seems to light up when she sees you, crossing the living room to meet you halfway.
“hey, els.”
you’re letting her engulf you in a hug, arms wrapping around your waist as she buries her face in the crook of your neck.
“missed you today,” she hums, rocking your weight from side to side.
“missed you too,” you say gently.
ellie’s pulling away a short distance, finger bumping under your chin so you’ll look up at her.
“why didn’t you say hi when you stopped in today?” she nearly pouts. “zack came in when we were slow and said that someone dropped something off for me.”
you shrug, unable to tell her that insecurity was rearing its ugly head and you didn’t know how to deal with it in that moment.
“my girl didn’t wanna eat with me?”
“sorry,” you mumble, burning up under the heat of her gaze. “i couldn’t stay long.”
her brows are furrowing, hands coming up to smooth your hair from your face and brush over your shoulders.
“everything okay, babe?”
you nod once, then twice.
“yeah, why wouldn’t i be?”
ellie’s watching you closely, fingers cupping your neck.
“talk to me,” she encourages softly. “did something happen?”
you swallow, shake your head, and put on your most convincing smile before leaning up to give her a peck on the lips.
“m’okay,” you tell her.
she doesn’t look convinced, but she also doesn’t wanna pry.
changes the subject instead.
“so does this mean, you’ll swing by and actually hang out with me soon?” she asks, body relaxing when you start smoothing over the wrinkles in her coveralls as a distraction.
you nod, smile widening when she starts peppering kisses all over your face.
for a little bit, you forget about ellie’s coworker and you forget about the comment that zack made, but then you’re popping in again almost two weeks later.
they’re shoulder to shoulder in the body shop, looking at something under the hood of a silver pick up truck. ellie’s engrossed, but the girl’s fullblown staring, paying no mind to whatever ellie’s explaining in the engine bed.
makes you sick to your stomach thinking that if ellie so much as chances a glance, their noses could brush.
“hey receptionist is— oh.”
it’s zack, the same mechanic from last time.
he’s wiping his hands on an old towel as he emerges from one of the bays.
“ellie!” he shouts past the propped open door.
she nearly jumps out of her skin, parting from her coworker as she throws a cross look over her shoulder.
“your girl’s here,” he announces.
ellie’s straightening up, craning her neck even more before her face splits into a bright smile.
she’s abandoning the girl by the truck, jogging across the body shop to duck into the lobby.
“hi, angel.”
your cheeks warm when she slides her arm around your waist to pull you into her.
“gonna go on lunch break, don’t wait up,” she calls & you’re sparing the girl near the truck a glance.
her name’s emma if the stitching on the right breast of her coveralls is anything to go by.
she makes a show of taking you in from head to toe before her gaze cuts to zack and they seemingly share a wordless exchange.
oh.
you have no clue what to make of that, but ellie’s steering you from the lobby and out into the crisp air.
it’s still a little chilly outside, but you’re wearing one of ellie’s favorite sweatshirts and she’s shrugging on a hoodie hanging from a coatrack by the door.
“my truck?” she offers when a chill rips down your spine.
you only hum.
when the two of you are settled, her in the driver’s seat and you in the passenger’s, she’s taking the little bag with lunch containers and setting it on her dash before pulling you towards her to eliminate every inch of space between the two of you.
“whaddya doing?” you sigh out a laugh.
“i missed you,” ellie says simply.
“ellie, you slept over last night,” you squeak out a breathy laugh when her ice cold hands slide under the warmth of the red fleece. “we saw each other this morning.”
“so?” she replies petulantly. “wanna be with you all the time.”
you’re wearing a turtleneck underneath the sweatshirt so she’s nosing along your jaw before pressing a few soft kisses there.
“you’re so clingy recently, els,” you giggle, arms winding around her neck.
“duh.” and your belly flips when she doesn’t even deny it. “you’re so fucking cute and i just wanna keep you in my pocket all the time.”
that earns her a full-hearted laugh and you really begin to wonder why you let that girl with her stupidly perfect blown out hair and stupidly rounded ass and the most stupidly pretty face ever make you question your ellie.
you live in bliss for the duration of her forty-five minute break where she does a whole lot of eating, but not necessarily the food you made for her.
the windows are equal parts fogged and frosted by the time she’s done with you and you’re shimmying your jeans back up in the back seat of her truck as she shrugging the top half of her discard coveralls and her hoodie back on again.
“you didn’t even touch to food i made you,” you whine.
“i’ll eat it on my ten,” she assures you, and your toes curl when she wipes her lips with the back of her hand.
“liked what i had for lunch better,” she says so casually, your cheeks are on fire.
“ellie!”
“definitely need dessert when i get home,” she insinuates, leaning her weight over your blissed out body.
she plants a kiss on your mouth before climbing back into the front seat.
but, in the lobby, when she’s bidding you a farewell with another peck on the lips, promising she’ll try to come home early, you notice emma’s eyes again. they’re searing, laced with obvious annoyance.
ellie’s returning to her duties and you’re ducking into their restroom for a moment to splash your face with cool water.
ellie’s never given you a reason to doubt her, has been a perfect girlfriend since the beginning, but you can’t help yourself.
especially not when you’re ducking out and you hear it.
“so i’m not the only one surprised that her girl looks like that?” you think it’s zack, but you can’t be so sure.
“i dunno, she’s hot, but they don’t really match,” another voice sounds. “especially since her last…thing was with emma.”
and, wow, fuck, you hadn’t been expecting that.
“damn, i forgot about that,” maybe zack says. “it was at the party mel and them threw, right? when they fucked?”
you’d wanted to give the benefit of the doubt. maybe they’d been a thing once upon a time, kissed on occasion, but hearing it put so crassly makes you feel like you’re gonna throw up.
the bell’s tinkling hard against the glass when you throw the door open.
and perhaps the situation with finding out about ellie and emma goes hand-in-hand with the way ellie experiences her jealousy.
maybe the fact that ellie still works closely with a previous situationship and is obviously on friendly terms with makes you withdraw a little.
you’re spending a lot more time at your cafe, readying for spring launch and brainstorming new recipes.
you don’t want to bore ellie, especially when you’ve been so in your head about everything lately, so you’re putting in more hours, coming home late at night.
truthfully, ellie’s devastated because she misses her girl :/ why are you always so busy suddenly?
so when a familiar face comes poking into the cafe a few weeks down the line, your eyes are as wide as saucers.
“wow, alex, is that you?”
she’s an ex who’d moved abroad for work a few years back. and the break up had been amicable enough, but she’d moved on and so had you.
the only contact the two of you keep is the occasional comment on social media and a text or two during the holidays.
she’s grinning ear-to-ear.
“what are you doing here?” you ask incredulously, setting the rag down on the bartop to round the counter.
you’d been in the middle of prepping to close up shop when the bells chimed against the glass.
“visiting my parents for a few weeks,” she answers. “thought i’d stop by and see how you’re doing.”
“great, i’m doing great,” you assure her with a warm smile. “what about you? how’s germany?”
“definitely miss the food here sometimes, but you know,” she shrugs and you’re letting out a laugh. “and...julia’s pregnant.”
and your brows are shooting up, arms wrapping around her middle.
“alex, that’s so exciting!” you cheer. “congratulations.”
her cheeks are red when you pull away.
“yeah,” she says softly, eyes gentle. “i’m so excited.”
and you’re glad to hear that things are working out for her, that she’s established herself well and she’s building the family she’s always dreamed of.
“and you?” she asks.
“what about me?”
“are you seeing anyone?”
it’s your turn to warm, fidgeting under her expectant gaze.
“i am,” you confirm.
her smile widens
“that’s great,” she says genuinely. “i’m glad. i hope they make you happy.”
and it really makes you draw into yourself for a moment because ellie does. she makes you so fucking happy, you don’t know what to do with yourself sometimes.
“yeah,” you hum. “she’s great.”
the two of you end up catching up a little as you close, and she even takes you up on your offer of visiting again for a tasting before she leaves!
and this is most likely what sends ellie over the edge.
at first she didn’t know why you were suddenly so distant, knew you were dedicated, but didn’t know why you were so invested as of late.
recently, it’s been her popping into your apartment, but being disappointed to find that you’re not even home.
and the days that she does catch you, you’re pecking her on the lips and rushing out the door.
makes ellie question if there’s something she should be paying closer attention to.
honestly, she’s just really worried that she did something wrong, so as she’s trekking up the sidewalk to approach your little cafe with a bundle of cute flowers around 10 in the evening, she’s feeling a weird sense of deja vu.
finds that the open sign has been flipped and that the lights are dim, but nearly trips over her steps when she peers inside and sees you behind the counter.
you’re not alone, a tall figure leaned up against the bartop, obviously deeply interested in whatever you’re animatedly talking about.
you’re still wearing your apron, hair falling from its hold and a lump is lodging its way into ellie’s throat.
tugs gently on the handle to see that it’s locked and the motion catches both you and your company’s attention.
god, whoever you’re with is an absolute stunner and ellie’s swallowing hard as you round the counter and flit through the tables to come let her in.
“els, what are you doing here?” you ask, smiling softly.
barely registers what you’re saying because the girl you’re with has straightened and there’s something so put together and elegant about the brunette that makes a pang of insecurity begin to coil in ellie’s stomach.
“wanted to see you,” she says simply.
“oh,” you reply. “we were just finishing up here, i would’ve been home in like an hour.”
and that leaves such a sour taste in her mouth because a lot can happen in an hour, in forty-five minutes even.
“great, i’ll walk you home,” ellie says, tone pinched.
your brows furrow and you’re opening your mouth to ask ellie if everything’s fine, but alex is placing a casual hand on your shoulder to remind you she’s there and ellie can’t help but zero in on the way her slender fingers curl.
“alex,” she introduces, offering her other hand.
“ellie,” your girlfriend bites back, glancing at alex’s outstretched palm before glancing back up at her.
there’s a twinkle of knowing in alex’s eye as she nods thoughtfully.
“heard a lot about you,” she says simply.
ellie merely hums.
and god, you’re mortified because you’d spent the entire night raving about ellie even though alex was supposed to be giving you feedback on launch ideas.
you’d told her how kind and great ellie was. instead, here she is, ice cold and glaring.
“well...” alex turns her attention to you. “i really appreciate tonight, everything was phenomenal.”
you preen under the praise and ellie’s rolling her eyes, fist tightening around the stems of the flowers.
“of course, anytime,” you assure her. “thank you for visiting me again.”
and seeing the two of you side-by-side, ellie feels so small. because you’ve always been so pretty, so out of her league and the two of you look like a match made in heaven.
“always,” alex replies, and ever the instigator, she adds, “text me when you get home?”
“i will,” you tell her, brushing past ellie to lock her out. “goodnight, alex, be safe!”
she says something in return that evades ellie’s hearing, but she’s far too livid to even tune in.
you’ve barely locked the door behind her when ellie’s voice cuts through the tense air.
“who the fuck was that?” she asks sharply.
you turn on your heel, brows dipping because ellie’s rarely let her anger get the best of her.
“ellie, what are—”
“i asked you a question,” she says firmly.
you roll your lips, gaze downcast because such a good moment has been obliterated by ellie’s fiery temper.
“we dated a few years ago,” you answer honestly. “she was back in town for the next few weeks and i wanted to do something nice.”
ellie lets out a humorless laugh.
“so i’ve been worried sick for weeks because you wanna ghost me when you’ve really been parading around with your ex?” ellie huffs.
and okay, wow, you hadn’t really expected that from her because your ellie is usually relatively level-headed.
“this is only the second time i’ve seen her, ellie,” you argue. “we were friends way before we even dated and it was a clean break up. we were just catching up.”
ellie’s tossing the bouquet of flowers, now crushed by her unrelenting fist, onto the nearest table top.
“just catching up, huh?” she mocks. “so a romantic set up, just the two of you, is just catching up? you said not to wait up for you because you’d be caught up with work. good to know that screwing your ex is—”
“this is work,” you bite back. “i’ve been trying to get my bearings for this upcoming launch and she was kind enough to put up with all my crazy ideas and all my rambling,” then quietly, “given ninety percent of it was about you.”
“what, you couldn’t ask me?” ellie huffs. “you know i’d help you if you wanted me to!”
“i didn’t ask because i know all this shit bores you,” you say weakly. “alex was just being nice.”
that shuts ellie up, douses her anger like a bucket of ice cold water on a fire. and now she feels like a piece of shit because she hadn’t known that you felt that way.
“and she’s engaged,” you add, pulling away from her when she takes a step towards you. instead you busy yourself with gathering your spread and all the silverware. “they’re expecting a child.”
and fuck, ellie wishes she’d slowed down. wishes that she hadn’t talked out of her ass.
“i didn't—”
“you’re one to talk, ellie,” you add coldly. “you work in close proximity with a girl you used to fuck regularly. you’re still friends with her, and it’s obvious to every single soul imaginable that i’m just an obstacle to her and that she’s still interested. but i didn’t say anything even if it fucking ate away at me because i know you. you’ve never given me a reason to doubt us.”
that knocks that wind from ellie’s lungs because she hadn’t realized that you knew. just wanted to sweep it under the rug because her and emma were never serious and she didn’t want you worrying.
“wait, angel, i’m sorry,” ellie says. “i—”
you shake your head.
“whatever, ellie,” you whisper. “i have to close up.”
“c’mon, babe, don’t—”
“i don’t wanna talk about this anymore,” you cut her off. “i’ll be home soon, but i wanna be alone right now.”
when you get home and see ellie’s sneakers by the door, you take in a deep breath and try to mentally prepare yourself for the inevitable conversation, but instead, you’re met with the smell of your favorite take out and a soft murmur from your vinyl player in the living room.
when you make it to the end of the corridor to peer into the kitchen, you see ellie taking down a few plates.
she’s glancing over her shoulder, body seemingly relaxing when she finds you standing in the archway of the kitchen.
“hey,” she greets softly, and you belatedly realize that her voice is hoarse.
“hi,” you reply.
“wanna eat first?” she asks you, but you don’t answer, too busy analyzing her.
you put two and two together; figure that she’s been crying if the red bags under her eyes and the dying flush on her cheeks is anything to go by.
she takes a step towards you and you seem to snap out of it.
“wanna shower first,” you tell her.
you hear her gulp.
“okay,” she says.
and you hate this. you hate being upset and you hate that she’s upset and knowing that ellie cried makes you wanna cry, so you’re taking a step towards her.
she’s glancing at you.
“shower with me?” you offer timidly.
ellie’s pushing off the counter, nodding eagerly.
and truthfully, ellie had every intention of keeping her hands to herself, but then you were asking her to help work the soap down your back.
then you were turning to face her to rinse under the stream of the showerhead. the sudsy water’s making its way down the column of your throat and the curves of your body and ellie’s tongue is so dry, she feels like it could crack in her mouth.
her hands settle on the narrow of your waist, right over the swell of your hips as she presses open-mouthed kisses on your shoulder.
“i’m so sorry, angel,” she whispers, hands sliding to rest against the small of your back.
you give in even though you’re still in your head, arms looping around her neck as she brushes your hair to one side and starts paying a lot more attention to the spot right behind your ear.
“s’okay, els,” you assure her softly. “i’m sorry, too. i was being a brat.”
your fingers tangle in the hair at the nape of her neck, breath hitching when she grabs a palmful of your ass and breaks away from your neck to catch your lips between her own.
“you don’t know how much i love you,” she murmurs between kisses, sighing brokenly when the plush of your tits presses against her sensitive nipples.
you moan when one of her hands slides down your front and gently brushes over your clit.
“ellie,” you whimper.
“let me show you?”
your head is lolling back when the pads of her calloused fingers circle your entrance to gather the slick that’s accumulating there.
you nod.
“yeah, yeah, ellie, please,” you choke.
she’s reaching behind you to turn the shower off, ducking outside of the tiled space to grab your towel.
and she’s slow, meticulous as she dries you off, mouth watering when the cool air of the bathroom makes gooseflesh ripple over your smooth skin.
“you’re so fucking perfect,” ellie whispers, standing behind you in the mirror. “so fucking perfect and all mine.”
your eyelids are drooping shut as she discards the towel, hands wandering as her teeth sink into your neck.
“oh, fuuu—”
ellie’s jostling you back into your bedroom. when she’s about to push you back against the mattress, you’re spinning so that she’s falling against the unmade duvet, taking you with her.
and ellie’s gaze is glazing over when you spread her legs to reveal a pussy slick with need and a clit so swollen, it makes you salivate.
“what are you doing?” she whispers, fingertips denting the fat of your thighs.
“wanna ride you, els,” you whimper, climbing to straddle her heat. “wanna take care of you.”
one of her legs stretches to settle over your shoulder and you’re kissing her calf as your clits bump.
“fuck,” ellie chokes when you start rolling your hips. “fuck, wait, angel, just—”
the slip is delicious, obscene sound of your combined arousal echoing through the room to mingle with ellie’s throaty moans.
ellie’s used to watching you ride her strap, used to fucking you and giving you everything because it’s one of the things that makes her the happiest, but, fuck, she could get used to this.
“you gonna cream all over my pussy, ellie?” you whine, pace relentless as you ride her.
she lets out a breathy laugh.
“you feel how wet i am?” ellie gasps, thumb coming to nestle between your heat. the friction feels so fucking good against your clit, has you throwing your head back as you fuck her. “god, you’re fucking delusional if you think i’m not a hundred and ten percent obsessed with you.”
“oh fuck, ellie, your pussy feels s’good,” you whine, eyes watering when her other hand settles on your hip to guide you.
“does it, angel?” she moans breathily. “only you can get me like this.”
“you’re so wet, els,” you marvel. “your cunt’s so soft and so...so—”
“it’s all yours,” she whispers shakily, hips jerking because she’s close. “all yours, angel.”
and she’s crying out when you slip off of her, hands grabbing for you desperately.
she’s throwing her head back against your pillows when your lips latch onto her clit.
“oh, shit,” she moans. “wait, wait.”
but you don’t wait, in fact, your ministrations quicken, tongue lapping at the slick that gushes from ellie’s cunt.
“fuck, angel, i’m gonna—”
the broken moan that leaves ellie’s lithe body has you clenching your thighs. and you think she’s gonna cum, but her palm is firm against your forehead to push you away gently.
her eyes nearly roll to the back of her head when a string of spit webs from your chin to her clit.
“m’not cumming before you do,” she swallows. “this was supposed to be about you.”
“it is,” you assure her. “all i care about right now is making you cum.”
“jesus, you’re actually something else,” ellie sighs shakily, combing a tattooed hand through her damp locks.
you’re making a move to close in on her pussy again, but she’s pushing you onto your back, settling her achey cunt over your thigh as she circles both of your wrists in one hand.
“let me take care of you and you can do whatever you want with me for the rest of the night,” ellie promises, sloppy kiss turning into her licking into your mouth.
her fingers waste no time finding your folds, pads eager against your bud before dipping lower to tease at your entrance.
“how could you think i’d want any other pussy other than yours, angel?” she whispers against your mouth as she stuffs you knuckles deep. “this is all mine, you hear me? all fuckin’ mine.”
you nod, squirming against where she’s still got you confined with a bruising grip around your wrists.
“s’all yours, els,” you whimper.
“just like this pussy’s all yours,” she husks, hips rolling over the swell of your thigh. “would never fucking dream of giving myself to anyone but you.”
and god, ellie knows all the right things to say to have you winding tight.
you’re arching into her, jaw slack and eyes crossing as she hits that spot inside you that has you feeling fucking boneless.
“c’mon, angel,” she encourages you. “just once all over my fingers, then you can do whatever you want to me.”
the squelch has ellie’s thighs shaking as she rolls her hips, knuckles curling hard inside the warm heat of your needy pussy.
“don’t stop, els,” you beg her. “i’m gonna—”
she’s freeing your wrists, climbing from your thigh to settle on her knees at the end of the bed.
“wait, els, i’m gonna—”
and the moan that leaves you can be heard by the entire apartment block, no doubt, because ellie’s sucking your clit past her lips and eating you out like it’s the last thing she’ll ever do.
the shit she’s murmuring against your folds is filthy, has you trying to squeeze your knees together because ellie’s that good.
“ohfuckohfuckohfuck,” you cry out when she adds a third finger.
it’s all it takes because a few moments later, your back’s arching all the way off the bed, thighs vibrating as she continues to toy with you through your orgasm.
“that’s it, angel,” ellie whispers. “ride it out.”
your chest heaves through the final waves, a sheen of sweat making your dewy skin look like it’s glistening under the lowlight of your bedside lamp.
“you did so fuckin’ good for me,” ellie says gently, standing naked between your parted legs as your arm drapes over your eyes in embarrassment.
“stop hiding,” she scolds, climbing to straddle you.
her hands are wandering, smoothing over every available expanse of skin as you cover your face and shy away from her.
she’s shocked when she pries your arm away and finds tears welling in your eyes.
“babe,” she calls incredulously. “why are you—”
“we wouldn’t have been in this situation if i wasn’t so immature and just talked to you about it,” you hiccup.
ellie’s face is falling, pulling you up to wrap you in her arms.
“babe, stop,” she whines softly, rocking you as a shudder rips down your spine. “i should’ve said something and i definitely shouldn’t have acted the way i did earlier. if anything i was immature.”
“you’re such a good girlfriend, ellie,” you whimper. “and i’m...i’m sorry, i—”
“hey, hey,” she stops you firmly, peeling away from you to thumb at your chin. “don’t do that.”
and you feel like such a big fucking baby as ellie repositions the two of you so that she’s leaning against your headboard and she’s pulling you against her sweaty chest.
“i’m sorry, ellie,” you choke again.
“stop apologizing,” ellie croaks, and you realize that the emotions are welling inside of her as well. “none of this was your fault, angel. i should’ve been honest and just told you, but i was scared.”
you’re still hiccuping, ear pressed over her heart.
“you’re my first real girlfriend in a really long time, and it doesn’t help that you’re so grossly out of my league, and—”
“ellie,” you chide.
“i don’t wanna mess things up with you,” she admits softly. “especially after the way we started.”
“i’d never hold that against you,” you swallow.
“and that’s what makes it worse. i know you wouldn’t even if you should,” ellie whispers. “and then today, i saw you with someone else and it made me so fucking mad because the two of you look so good together. it made me feel like i don’t deserve you.”
“els.” and you’re crying harder now, arms winding so tight around her waist, she feels like she’ll burst.
“i’m sorry,” ellie says gently. “you’ve always been so fucking good to me and—”
you’re leaning up, kissing her to shut her up before she starts crying and she’s cradling your face like you’re the most fragile thing.
“i love you so fucking much, ellie,” you tell her between kisses. “let’s just...let’s just put this behind us, okay?”
she nods, pulls from your lips to nestle her face in your neck.
“i love you more, angel,” she murmurs against your skin. “you don’t even know.”
neng © 2023
#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams fic#ellie williams smut#ellie williams au#ellie williams tlou#ellie williams#the last of us
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