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tigerlilla · 1 year

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act like you like me

(part two)

part one … part three

“sorry,” you shifted in the booth, “i’m nervous.”

he sighed. bakugo had messaged you last week about going on a double date with red riot and his boyfriend. you had happily agreed, totally fangirling.

“i don’t want to disappoint them,” you mumbled, adjusting your dress.

“just sit still and look pretty,” bakugo said. “you’ll be fine.”

you couldn’t even form a witty comeback, still squirming in your seat. your stomach was twisted in knots.

"bakugo!" you immediately recognized the voice.

"shitty hair," bakugo grinned, standing up from the booth. you smiled at the red headed hero and the hot blonde on his arm.

red riot smiled at you, "i'm glad i finally get to meet you."

you smiled, "the pleasure is all mine, red riot."

"kirishima," he replied, flashing his pointy teeth. "and this is my boyfriend, dylan."

the blonde beamed at you, "i've seen you in the news."

you laughed, "i've seen you as well." you remebered when kirishima and the model started dating, the positive and negative coments in the media.

"only my best angles, i hope," dylan smiled. you liked him.

bakugo and kirishima broke off into their own conversation.

“i loved you and bakugo at the go kart track,” dylan giggled, nursing a glass of something you couldn’t pronounce.

“god, that was two weeks ago,” you covered your face with your hands, “and it’s still being shared.”

“it’s cute!” dylan insisted. “pro heroes, they get yelled at by their partners just like us.” you smiled. “enough chit chat, we should dance!”

the thumping of the music had gotten progressively louder through the night. you played with the edge of your glass, admiring the lipstick smudge. god, when was the last time you were in a club? especially one for pro heroes and famous models.

you moved to tap bakugo on the shoulder as he turned to you, your faces much closer than you expected, “i’m going dancing with dylan,” you said. he nodded.

dylan grabbed your hand, pulling you into the crowd of bodies.

…

MODEL DYLAN RYLANT AND DYNAMIGHT’S GIRLFRIEND SPOTTED AT THE CLUB

DOUBLE DATE!! DYNAMIGHT AND RED RIOT TOGETHER WITH PARTNERS

DYNAMIGHT’S FRISKY NIGHT WITH GIRLFRIEND

you clicked on the last article, eyes drawn to the paparazzi pic of you on bakugo’s arm leaving the club, the hair you worked so hard on a terrible mess.

“pro hero dynamight was spotted leaving guy’s social club with his girlfriend alongside red riot and partner dylan rylant.” you continued to read, “fans were quickly drawn to a blurry picture of what seems like an intimate moment.”

another paparazzi picture. this one was from a phone camera, and showed your face centimeters from bakugo’s. your stomach twisted.

“bakugo and his girlfriend have yet to lay on the pda, but fans are hoping this is just the beginning of hot moments caught on camera.”

you scrolled through the comments; most positive. one in particular caught your eye, “couple of the year!! love them so much! love seeing this side of dynamight, he’s not a total ass lol”

you smiled and leaned back against the bakery counter, already thinking of what snarky comment to include when you sent the link to bakugo.

...

"see you, monday!" you smiled at your favorite customer. he came every saturday evening and bought crossiants and donuts for his family to enjoy sunday morning. his wife liked the berry crossiant with extra berries, he picked a ham and cheese crossiant, and he always got his sons donuts with sprinkles. last year, you made his twin sons an 8th birthday croquembouche with donut holes instead of cream puffs.

your reminiscing was interrupted by a call from dylan. "hey, wh-"

“where are you?” he said, sounding out of breath.

“at the bakery. what’s wrong?” you asked, quickly becoming concerned.

“your address was leaked, i just saw it-”

“what do- how? i-“

“i don't think you should be at the bakery right now. shit, i have to go. please be safe.” he hung up.

you pushed yourself off the counter, heading for the back room, already dialing bakugo, like an instinct you didn’t know you had.

the hero picked up on the third ring, “i’m at work, what-“

“dylan just called and said that my address was leaked and i don’t know what to do and-“

you heard him curse under his breath, “i’ll be there in a minute.”

“i don’t even know if it’s true or how he knows or-“

“calm down and stay in the back. i’ll be there soon.” bakugo hung up, leaving you feeling worse than before.

a quick search confirmed what dylan said; there was a whole thread of people talking about you, your real full name, where you lived, speculating how you spent your free time above the old bakery you worked at and why you dropped out of college. everything private that all might said he'd protect.

EVERY LIE DYNAMIGHT FED US ABOUT HIS GIRLFRIEND

you wanted to cry and scream and throw up. you were just looking at positive articles talking about how cute you and bakugo were last week.

you were too focused on the “leaked” picture of you walking into the bakery late one night, bakugo’s car in the background, to notice the pro hero stomping into the kitchen.

bakugo ripped your phone out of your hand. “we’re leaving.”

“this is my job,” you replied. “i can’t just leave.”

“that extra can fill in,” bakugo gestured to the high schooler playing on his phone in front of the oven.

“i-“

the entire building was filled with the sound of the bell on the counter being pounded over and over. “helloooo, is anyone here? i’m looking for bakugo’s girlfriend.”

you groaned. “i think me staying here would be worse. i’ll go talk to mr matsura and explain why you’ll be at the counter today, ichiro.”

hearing his name, the boy looked up from his phone, sputtering, “no, this is your mess. i’m not dealing with it. i don’t even-“

“oi! don’t fuckin talk to her like that,” bakugo barked, eyes locked on the poor kid. “no one gives a shit about your excuses, just do your damn job.”

the poor boy was terrified, eyes wide and a trembling frown. ichiro nodded and left, heading out to the woman still banging on the counter.

“that was really nice,” you frowned up at bakugo. “what’s wrong with you?”

“can’t even stick up for my damn girlfriend,” he mumbled, crossing his arms across his chest.

“thank you for sticking up for your poor damn girlfriend,” you put a hand on his arm. it felt like the perfect moment to peck him on the cheek, but you weren’t really his girlfriend and there weren’t any cameras to catch the moment, so really, there was no excuse for it. “i’m going to talk to mr matsura. help yourself to the fruit bars you like. i’ll be back in a minute.”

you walked over to your boss’s office door, knocking before letting yourself in. “good afternoon, sir. i am-“

the older man narrowed his eyes at you, “if you wouldn’t be a pain in the ass to replace, i’d fire you.”

you opened your mouth to speak, but he wasn’t done.

“at first i thought you dating that chump might be good for business. but you lied about where you worked, like anyone would believe you worked at a private financial firm,” you frowned at his insult, “and now it’s blown up in your face. take the rest of the day off. you better be here monday with all this mess cleaned up.”

“thank you, sir,” you bowed your head and slipped out the door. somehow the conversation had gone better and worse than you expected. you didn’t really peg your boss as the type of guy who read about who the pros were dating, but maybe you were wrong.

bakugo was not in the kitchen where you’d left him. he was not by the rack with the fruit bars. and he certainly was not the type to go talk to the lady asking ichiro for an interview about “the hero’s whore” (way harsh). to the boy’s credit, he kept his mouth closed.

you heard the thumping of his boots above your head and rolled your eyes. what a gentleman. you took the stairs by twos.

“why are you up here?” you asked, rounding the corner into your open bedroom. “holy shit.”

bakugo stood in front of your window, a giant crack spiderwebbing across the glass. “i heard a noise. maybe a rock.”

“oh my god,” hysteria wound it’s way up your throat. “they’re trying to kill me.”

“we’re leaving. get your shit. you’ll stay the night with me.”

you ignored him, rushing to draw the curtains on each window in your apartment. you weren’t sure if it would help, but it seemed like something.

by the time you got back into your bedroom, bakugo was picking through your closet, shoving things into a backpack he plucked off a hook.

he must have felt bad for you, for he softened just a bit, “i’ll call someone i know who sets up security systems, tomorrow. your window can be fixed too.”

“i don’t know if-“

please, just trust me.” he held out the partially stuffed backpack, gripping the strap with white knuckles.

“okay,” you replied quietly, taking the bag. you left out the back door ten minutes later, your stuffed backpack slung over bakugo’s shoulder.

…

you were quiet on the drive to bakugo’s apartment. there was too much to think about. you had texted dylan, updating him on what happened and asking for advice.

bakugo pulled into a big garage and turned off his car, sitting in the silence for a few seconds.

you wanted to reach out and touch his face, pull on the scowl he’d been wearing the whole day.

he turned, his red eyes catching on your face. “what are you staring at?”

“that ugly snarl ruining your pretty face,” you quipped back.

bakugo scowled deeper as you smiled. “whatever,” he grumbled as he got of his car, slamming the door behind him. bakugo led you from his private garage into the elevator and up the eleven floors to his apartment.

you held your tongue as he unlocked the front door. you couldn’t even imagine how luxurious his apartment must be. you slipped off your shoes, stepped inside, and frowned.

“be careful, you’ll get frown lines,” bakugo snarled as you frowned at his small apartment.

“are you sure we’re in the right place?” you asked, ignoring his comment. “this is tiny.”

“two bedrooms, one and a half bath,” he shrugged.

“you’re one of the most famous heroes in the world,” you gaped. “why do you only have one shower?”

bakugo looked at you like you were stupid, “why would i need more than one?”

“i… don’t know,” you frowned. “i guess i’m just used to people flaunting their wealth.” you looked around at the minimalist apartment; open floor plan with hardwood floor and eggshell walls, two rooms tucked off from the main space, a big kitchen with a bar, a tv propped on a quaint table in front of a sagging couch.

bakugo shrugged and walked off, your bag still on his back. “you can sleep in here. i’ll get new sheets.”

you followed him into the second bedroom. a bed was tucked in the corner, most of the room overtaken by a treadmill and an exercise bike and other miscellanous things shoved against the wall.

he must have noticed your gaze, he added, “i can move that shit if it bothers you.”

“no, it’s okay. i don’t mind.”

bakugo placed your backpack on the floor and left the room for a second before coming back with pale orange bed sheets. you stood there and watched as he stretched the thin cotton over the bed, the muscles in arms straining against his black tshirt. he stood up turning back towards you, pulling his buzzing phone out of his pocket. “all might’s loosing his fucking mind.” you nodded and he left you in the bedroom by yourself.

you dumped the backpack out on the bed, immediately giggling at what bakugo had packed at the bottom; a short black dress, black sneakers, black jeans, and a black tank top. he wanted you to match him, apparently. tucked at the very bottom of your bag were your bright pink, fuzzy pig slippers. you nearly squealed.

your excitement was quickly overshadowed by bakugo slamming his fist on the wall outside the apartment and yelling something you couldn’t quite make out.

you tip toed outside your room, trying to snoop become more aware of your surroundings.

bakugo’s bedroom was beside yours, the door closed. you opened the door slightly, peering in through the crack. immediately you slammed your hand over your mouth, trying to stifle your laughter. you opened the door wider, eyeing the bookshelf full of all might collectibles. magazines, books, action figures, soda cans; they were all there. holy shit.

“what are you doing?” bakugo barked, having snuck in after his intense call with all might.

you stepped back from the room, your eyes going wide, “sorry. i was looking for the bathroom.”

the corner of his mouth ticked up. he pointed to an open door on the other side of your room, obviously the bathroom. “bathroom’s right there.”

"got it. thanks." you wanted to wipe that stupid smirk off his face. you quickly walked to the bathroom, sitting down on top of the toliet seat. you stayed there, knees tucked against your chest.

so much had happened recently. you met dylan only a week ago. you hadn’t even been dating bakugo for two full months. you were thrust into the spotlight and quite honestly, you should have expected it. what did you think was going to happen, everyone would love you and be perfectly content to respect your privacy?

you had to give yourself credit. you were handling it all super fucking amazingly. look at you, sitting in bakugo’s guest bathroom, completely composed even though your deepest darkest secrets were probably out there, floating on the web, and your address getting leaked was only the tip of the iceberg.

you were fine. you would be fine.

bakugo turned on the tv in the living room, flipping over to the news. you could hear through the walls. he would settle on a channel and then change it a minute later. it was obnoxious. he wouldn’t even listen to a fully story.

you opened the door as soon as you heard your name from the anchor, “wait, stop.”

bakugo barely spared you a glance before changing the channel.

“no, go back to that last one.” bakugo flipped to the next station. “can you please go back?”

he sighed loudly, going back to the channel talking about you. you caught the end of what they were saying.

“…was kicked out of ivy university’s hero costume design program and started working at sweetie’s bake house last year.”

another anchor jumped in, “dynamight works for all might’s agency, which has a history of working to protect the privacy of their heroes. concealing where she worked and her full name kept her safe. look what happened.”

“the agency’s statement claimed she had a different job, different background, and name. can we even trust that they’re actually dating?”

jesus. they were having a fucking round table about you on air. and they were right.

“also, look at who they keep as company. can we even be sure she’s actually a girl?” one of them laughed.

“turn it off,” you said quietly. but bakugo had already powered off the tv by the time you finished. you caught his red eyes focused on your face.

“hero suit designer, eh?” bakugo drew your attention to him.

you narrowed your eyes at him, “yeah, wanna hear my advice? throw away those ugly ass gauntlets.”

he barked out a laugh.

you took his laugh as an invitation to join him on the couch. so you did, sitting on the far opposite end, over two feet of space between the two of you. you frowned at the pile of folders sitting on the coffee table, “work on a saturday evening?” anything to not have to talk about what just happened on tv.

“yeah,” he grunted, pulling the stack onto his lap. “i’m already behind on incident reports and i have to complete my property damage assessment for the quarter and someone needed rescuing in the middle of my paperwork.”

you sighed dramatically, tossing your hand over your forehead, “o wise one, great lord katsuki, how can i ever repay you for rescuing me, a poor damsel in distress?” he gave you a dirty look. you dropped the act, “i can help you with your paperwork. what is it? signing your name on the line?” you took the folder off the top of the stack. “i’m sure i can forge your name-“

bakugo ripped the paper from you, snarling. “don’t fucking touch my shit.”

you quieted, pulling back your hand, “i’m sorry. i didn’t… sorry.”

he ran a hand through his messy blonde hair, staying silent.

you quietly asked, “is there anyway i can help? proofreading reports or anything? i feel bad for putting you even further behind.”

the sun had begun to set, the lack of light in the room accentuating the dark circles under his eyes, the scar running down his left cheek. he stayed quiet, eyes focused on the papers in his lap.

you stood up from the couch, slipping back into the room you were using. you pulled your phone out of your pocket, noticing a hundred missed texts from dylan. you called and he picked up on the first ring.

“hi, how are you? where are you? are you safe?”

you smiled, “hi, dylan. i’m at bakugo’s apartment.”

“thank god. i’m sorry this is happening to you.”

“it’s not your fault,” you replied, picking at the orange blanket bakugo had laid across the bed. “this would have happened eventually.”

“it still sucks. i’m really sorry,” dylan sighed.

“it does suck. just a couple days ago i was a hero who somehow had clawed my way into the heart of stone cold bakugo and now i’m college dropout fraud.” the irony wasn’t lost on you. you were a fraud. you hadn’t unlocked bakugo’s heart, you’d clumsily fallen into his wallet.

“the media is ridiculously dramatic about everything. post a cute picture and they’ll forget all about this,” dylan replied.

“i don’t know. my work-“

“eiji, baby, i’m a genius!” dylan yelled. “i’ve had a wonderful idea. i’ll call you back tomorrow. and hey, i’ve had the terrible pleasure of knowing bakugo since eiji and i started dating and i know he’s a pain in the ass and i know he’s probably being mean to you about all of this stupid shit, but i also know that he cares for you and his piss poor attitude is him trying to show you that. i’ll have eiji kick him in the ass if you want me to, mkay? i’ll talk to you later, doll! call me if you need anything!”

“bye, i- you already hung up.” dylan was a fever dream. an addictive, confusing, amazing fever dream.

there was a knock on your door and bakugo let himself in.

he stood in the doorway, his shoulders somehow taking up the entire width. his red eyes were on you, so intense you wanted to curl in on yourself. “was that dylan?”

you nodded.

bakugo swallowed and you watched his throat bob. “i’m…” he swallowed again, “sorry.”

you blinked.

“i’m sorry for snapping at you.” he clinched his fists, like this was physically painful for him.

“it’s okay,” you replied, turning your face from him if just to relieve yourself from the burning of his gaze.

“no, you had a fuckin’ shit day and i made it worse and i am sorry.”

you turned back to him, still not wanting to meet his fiery eyes, instead focusing on the sharp lines of his jaw, the soft slope of his neck, the small huff of his breath, the small scar by his temple that you’d never noticed until now. “thank you.” your eyes flicked up to his and he visibly relaxed, his shoulders loosening and his jaw unclenching.

“did you want the money to go back to school?” he asked softly, as if he was scared to break the peace he just built.

“yes, but i also wanted a super hot pro hero boyfriend,” you bit down on your smile. “i secretly like the attention.”

the corner of bakugo’s mouth quirked up, “you think i’m super hot?”

“no, i’m using you to get to eraser head,” you taunted.

bakugo scoffed, “he’s old and ugly, been that way for years.”

you gasped, “take that back! i had his hero card framed and on my nightstand all throughout high school.”

bakugo laughed, his grin a devilish sight. “you never had my rookie hero card framed?”

“never even bought it,” you puffed out your chest.

“jesus woman, you’re killin’ me,” bakugo rolled his eyes, leaning back against the door frame.

“i haven’t even told you the best part,” you grinned. “i do have a hero card from your ua class; a signed shoto rookie card i payed a shit ton for.”

bakugo snarled, showing those pretty white canines, “yer just being fuckin mean, now.”

“obviously i liked the quiet, broody types,” you said, trying to contain your giggle.

bakugo looked like he was about to say something, but decided not to. he shook he head and walked out of your room. “whatever. are you hungry?”

you followed him into the kitchen, plopping down on a barstool. “i could eat.” you watched him move around the kitchen, his muscles slowly loosening, the stress in his face lightening. bakugo was loud and rambunctious and often overwhelming, but he had this grace and softness and fluidity that peeked through when you were looking hard enough.

“admiring the view?” bakugo smirked, saucepan in hand.

you blinked, startled out of your trance. you eyes had drifted to his chest, the fabric of his black shirt stretching over his pecs. “i am. thinking about how your hero costume should show more side boob.”

he hummed, “maybe i should get you a job in the costume department at the agency.”

“you have your own costume department? don’t most agencies just order from big brands?”

“it’s plus ultra, we have our own everything,” bakugo responded, tossing something else into the pan.

“plus ultra is such a dorky name for a hero agency.” you tilted your head, “why haven’t you and deku made your own agency yet?”

“running an agency is more paperwork than helping people. all might does the shit i don’t want to do,” he shrugged, dumping the contents of the pan onto plates.

“mhm, that’s why you came home with a giant stack of paperwork,” you raised an eyebrow. you knew better than to push him anymore, so you changed the subject. “where did you learn how to cook?”

“my mom,” he responded. “the old hag taught me to be good with a knife first, then flavor, and by then i liked it enough to keep cooking.” he slid a dish of pasta across the bar to you.

“thank you. you know, being good at cooking and high intelligence are deeply interlinked,” you said. you twisted up a bite of the pasta, knowing it would be delicious just from the heavenly smells. “you’re adaptable, make quick decisions, scrappy; all traits of a good chef and hero.”

“you bake, it’s the same as cooking.”

“baking is all about control, getting all the right measurements and techniques. it’s logical and straightforward. not like cooking at all. i’m a terrible cook,” you admitted.

“it’s not hard,” bakugo frowned.

“i wish i could make food that tastes this good,” you hummed, shoveling pasta into your mouth. he gave you his look of amused disgust, “sorry, i haven’t eaten all day.”

he smirked, pushing more pasta from the pan onto your plate, “eat up, princess.”

…

katsuki had told you he was going to bed 30 minutes ago. he had lied.

the day had been total shit. he wasn’t even sure why the media was so upset with you, but he was pissed about it. he was pissed about many things. but most of all, he was pissed about the folder sitting in front of him. the folder he had ripped out of your hands just a few hours ago.

he had known what was inside of that folder, who had dropped it off on his desk, who was getting fired on monday.

the folder sat open on his bed as he stared down at the paper inside of it. total fucking bullshit. he hated the press people at all might’s agency. he hated every one of his actions being picked over by a group of extras, predicting how it would effect his popularity polls, his hero ranking.

they were the ones who had pushed bakugo into your little agreement and now they were the ones wanting him to break it off.

he didn’t give a shit that his popularity poll had dropped by 2.3% today. he didn’t give a shit that you had “served her purpose” and were “dead weight now.”

couldn’t they see what a breath of fresh air you were? how his incident response satisfaction rating had increased by 14% since you two had started dating? that his popularity polls had been better than deku’s for the past month?

they had ate that shit up last week. you were an accessory to them, bakugo had realized. you were to be worn on his arm when they pleased and thrown away when they found something better, a new way to boost his ratings.

they even had included a goddamn breakup press statement in the folder. you had dropped out of college, not killed the fucking emperor.

bakugo picked up his phone, mulling over dylan’s text.

dylan (kiri): had a great idea on how to cheer up ur girlfriend. you haven’t been to our poker nights in sooo long and i think she would like meeting all ur friends. i can even post a cute pic of u the world will go crazy over. we have a private room at the club so it’ll be totally safe. it can be a cute lil date!!!

he replied, a short and sweet “k.”

dylan (kiri): yay!!!! i’ll bring the booze n the friends, you bring the hottie

dylan (kiri): hottie meaning ur girlfriend

dylan (kiri): i know u struggle connecting the dots sometimes xox

bakugo rolled his eyes and tossed his phone back on his bed, picking up the shitty documents inside the folder.

he ripped them up, dropping the shredded paper into the toliet bowl, flushing it down the pipes.

fuck it. he still had a month and a half left with you, whether his shitty pr team liked it or not.

…

“good morning, grumpy pants. you’re looking soft and cuddly this morning,” you smiled at a sulking bakugo standing in the kitchen as you slid out of your bedroom.

“it’s almost noon,” he grumbled, pushing a plate of eggs and rice across the bar.

“i was tired,” you shrugged, nibbling on a cold chunk of scrambled egg. “can you microwave this for like a minute?” bakugo gave you the strangest look. “why are you looking at me like that? it’s cold.”

“if you woke up at a reasonable time, it would have been warm.” bakugo crossed his arms over his chest, wearing his typical black tshirt and pants. “i don’t have a microwave, shitters cause cancer.”

you rolled your eyes, “jesus, you are such an old man. microwaves are safe, i’ve been using them my whole life.”

he raised a blond eyebrow, “maybe that explains the college dropout thing.”

your jaw dropped, “that was so mean! i dropped out because i was broke and they were going to kick me out if i couldn’t pay, not because i’m stupid.” you pouted, shoving his plate of food back towards him. “i think i liked it better when you ignored me.”

the corner of his mouth ticked up. goddamn his stupidly cute little smile. “sure.” bakugo slid the food of your plate into a pan, placing it back atop the stove. his back was to you, his massive shoulders blocking the entire stove hood vent from view.

“anything exciting in the paper today?” you ask, reaching for it across the countertop. “i would read it, but i can’t read. dropped out of college, remember?” you heard bakugo’s scoff smirk and smiled. “anything about me?”

he turned back around, sliding the pile of steaming rice back onto your plate. “i think they’ve forgotten all about your college scandal, princess.”

you took a bite of the food, nearly burning your mouth. “mmmmnghff, ‘eally? il yam uz ight” bakugo waited for you to swallow and translate. “i said “dylan was right.” he told me the whole thing would blow over soon. now i just have to take care of my address leak.”

bakugo leaned against the counter, crossing his arms. you hated that his arms looked so good when he did that. “i called a security company this morning, they can install a system by wednesday.”

your eyes widened, “thank you, katsuki. i appreciate that.”

he nodded. “you’ll be staying with me until it’s set up.”

“what?” you frowned, “i have work tomorrow. all my stuff is in my apartment, my clothes, my-“

“i packed you clothes.”

“you packed me a mini dress and pig slippers, bakugo.”

he looked at you, his pretty face completely neutral, “yeah, that’s what you wear.”

you couldn’t help it, you burst out laughing. “oh my god, katsuki. you’re too cute.” the look on his face told you he didn’t understand what you thought was so funny. you gestured to the clothes you were still wearing from the day before, your long sleeve bakery shirt and jeans.

he scoffed, “fine. we can stop by your apartment and pick up a few things.”

you cocked your head, “and you’re going to take me to work tomorrow morning?”

he nodded, “it’s on the way to the agency.”

you shrugged, “okay. thank you for breakfast.”

bakugo took your empty plate, dumping it in the sink. “i am taking you somewhere tonight.”

“you’re taking me somewhere? where?”

“secret.”

you raised an eyebrow, “it’s a surprise?” bakugo nodded. “is there a dress code?” you frowned, “will there be paparazzi?”

he shook his head, “no, you’ll be fine.”

you sighed out of relief. “i’m excited. will you tell me where we’re going? have i been there before?”

bakugo grunted, pushing himself off the counter, “i’m not telling you.”

“is it like a date or…? don’t walk away from me! are you taking me on a super secret surprise date, bakugo katsuki?” you giggled as he slammed his bedroom door in your face. “are you sure all might didn’t put you up to this?” you yelled through his door.

“shut up.”

you laughed, walking the few steps over to the bedroom that’d be yours for a bit longer than expected.

…

“we have to leave in an hour,” bakugo said, plopping down on the only chair in your entire apartment.

“i’ll hurry,” you promised, slipping into your bedroom. your first stop was the shower and you couldn’t forget to pack your nice soaps for your brief stay at hotel bakugo.

you had made sure you packed the black dress bakugo had picked out so you could change into it after your shower. bakugo was wearing a dress shirt, so you figured you had to be going somewhere nice.

by the time you were dressed, your backpack was full of soap and clothes and your laptop and the cook book you were stealing recipes from.

“okay, i’m ready with fifteen minutes to spare. i just need to put on my shoes,” you stepped out of your bedroom.

bakugo was leafing through the books scattered on your kitchen counter. fashion magazines were haphazardly spread out next to week old cups of tea and empty plates, a cookbook was opened to a croissant recipe, a newspaper with bakugo on the front had a crusty bowl of oatmeal covering up the best part of his costume, your favorite smut series was stacked against the wall.

“god, that’s embarrassing,” you mumbled to yourself, balancing on one leg while you buckled your platform sandal.

bakugo turned to you, the sinking sun catching on his hair, making it look like spun gold. he was so gorgeous it made you sick.

you stood up, passing him your backpack bursting at the seams. “how do i look?” you asked, doing a tiny spin before looking back at him over the open back of the dress.

“like you’re going to complain about being cold,” he grumbled, leaning against your kitchen wall. bakugo held out the jacket tucked under his arm.

you narrowed your eyes, but took the jacket, slipping into it. his big black zip up probably ruined your adorable little black dress, but bakugo was right. you would have complained about being cold the minute you stepped outside.

bakugo slid the backpack over his shoulder, heading for the front door.

“oh, wait,” you stopped, “i left something. i’ll be right back.” bakugo sighed, but you ignored him, heading back for your bedroom.

you pulled out the trunk from under your bed, opening it up to what you knew would be laying neatly on top.

you pulled the limited edition rookie hero card still in its protective sleeve from its prized position atop the trunk and slid it into your sweatshirt pocket. you smiled to yourself as you kicked the trunk back under your bed and walked back to your front door.

“okay, i’m ready now.”

you locked your apartment door behind you and followed bakugo down the stairs and back out to his car.

“will you please tell me where we’re going?” you asked, pouting in the passenger seat of his sports car.

“no, stop asking,” he grumbled, eyes catching yours in the rear view mirror.

satisfied with his annoyance, you rubbed your thumb over the hero card hiding in your pocket, biting down on your smile.

“why are you smiling like that?” bakugo asked.

“it’s a secret,” you smiled wider, satisfied with yourself. bakugo grumbled something under his breath you couldn’t quite catch.

he was the same grumbly, grouchy boy you’d met 10 years ago on the side of the street after a villain attack, pissed off that you’d asked him to sign your rookie card you had spent hours looking through card packs to find. and you couldn’t help but smile at that.

next chapter!!

an// this is more a transitional chapter and i hate it and i am sorry but i hope that maybe you liked it and hopefully it made you smile, next part soon kiss kiss

tag list: @cathwritestragediesnotsins @baby320 @nonomesupposedto @thekaylahub @jasmixs @chuugarettes @luvbug4728 @aceredhairliberal @selfindulgenthoe @atsushiki

#bakugo katuski #bakugou x reader #bnha bakugou #bakugo x female reader #bakugou headcanons #mha bakugou #soft bakugo katsuki #bakugou imagine #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou katsuki #bakugo #katsuki bakugo mha #mha imagines #mha fluff #mha x reader #bakugo fluff #fake dating bakugo #fake dating

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moonystoes · 4 days

Text

Hey guys I want to talk to you about something that may not be that serious but it still bothered me and I'm pretty sure it will annoy some of the mascs (this is a big rant about elisa I'm sorry lol)

This all started when i found this fanpage (ireignx) on Instagram. She posted a screenshot of Elisa from the new DAZN video. Elisa was smiling and looking straight at the camera and she made a caption saying, 'why does Elisa look so different in this video compared to her matches'. Now I do understand that Elisa does sometimes look different, that's because the camera is right at her face. It's not a video from a 'football angle', elisa isn't focused or aggressive in these videos, and this is how Elisa is when she's relaxed. So I didn't think much of what she said.

But then she posted a video of elisa dancing in her story (if you've seen the dazn video, it's when she got a point and celebrated) and then made a caption saying 'ew I just got an ick'. I get that people like different things and sometimes get icked out at certain things, but for this? Really? After I saw this I just knew why she got the 'ick'. And that's because elisa danced like a girl. I don't care if I sound reaching because NOTHING was weird about that video. It's not like that one video where she was dancing like a drunk dad to no music (iykyk 😭😭😭 it still haunts me).

She also made a comment saying 'now we know why elisa is single'... lmfaooo I'll talk about this in a different paragraph. My point here is that mascs are still girls, they act like girls, they love like girls, the laugh like girls, they ARE girls. Don't look at masc women and expect them to behave like something they aren't. They just like to dress 'manly'. I bet this bitch closed her eyes when she saw Elisa wearing a bikini lolll.

This was one of the main issues when it came to Elisa. When you look at edits of her on tiktok, so many comments were straight women feeling confused and questioning themselves. Like 'omg I like men but she's so hot' or 'wait why am i feeling this why I'm straight'. To all the straight women that are attracted to Elisa and are questioning themselves, please don't feel guilty for your attraction. It's okay. Like I don't even know what my sexuality is and all my life I thought I was straight except the Kristen Stewart phase I had when I was 14 😭 and a ruby rose one when I was 11. I just hope you know that she is a girl no matter how much you try to make her look 'masculine' in your head. She's not some 'alpha male aggressive' guy you're thinking she is, even when her playing style is quite aggressive.

I think what finalized everything is when she posted this:

... yeah, exactly what I expected.

Okay...now about the whole 'elisa is single situation'. THIS BITCH IS SOO RUDE. ugh the way I was texting her and the way she was responding was actually making me fight my fight or flight tendencies.

Basically when she posted the 'now we know why elisa is single', I was confused because like...she literally said she's not what are yall on about 💀💀. So I decided to respond to that message by saying. (This is the screenshots of the convo btw)

"You must be new here" 👆🤓🤓🤓 you annoying dumb ass bitch 😭

"Oh dear" ✋️😮‍💨 LMFAOO BRO WHATTT

"Elisa out here liking big ass big tatty half naked girls"... and then she sends a reel from Nourhene....one of the biggest French infleunecers and YouTubers that has been on the public for YEARS. If you can't remember nourhene, this is her:

(The one on the left)

She was literally invited by PSG to meet the women players, and elisa gifted her a free ticket to the champions league match, they're literally friends 😭. And also... that reel she sent had no tits or ass in it LMFAO, like what are we talking about, girl was acting like its some porn blog or something. And even if elisa liked a naked porn video, that doesn't make elisa single, it just makes her a shitty girlfriend loll.

Also btw... do you really think elisa would have to LIE just to not kiss a fan?? She literally could've just said 'no sorry' but you really think she felt so bad about offending her to the point where she decides to lie about dating someone?? Babe no offense but your feelings are not that important and I don't think she would care that much about rejecting you. Also, Elisa is getting fangirls obsessing over her left and right nowadays, do you think she'd lie like that knowing the fangirls are gonna go fucking crazy and lose it? (Shh... I did too😔)

I honestly don't even know what else to add other than just... please idk use your brain or something? Like I'm so sorry this has been bothering me for two days ngl and I really needed to rant it out.

#elisa de almeida #nel's thoughts #rants #sorry #wlw

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baekhvuns · 2 years

Note

Lmao the choreographer posted about the SMN issue on his story and even commented 👁👄👁 I wonder if we hear anything about it, any apologies hmmm.

Omg do you remember that one fan call from DV era when Hwa said someone hated his long hair??? He talked about it again and wtf, but he likes long hairstyles, so let's cheer! I'm so happy that Atiny reassured him. Whenever he says he's anxious to reveal his new hair because "Atiny like his black hair the most" I'm like "BABY BOY I'M TEAM ITCHY SCALP I SUPPORT ALL YOR DYEING ENDEAVOURS!"

Seonghwa content spam: Please I- ... I'M GONNA EAT HIM FIRST STOPPPP. DON'T MAKE ME CRI and this? Harvard business major/class clown Park Seonghwa

We also got fox Woo today, so I win, I love my Foxyoung agenda

Right so Hwa is a Want enthusiast, we need more of them, taste taste 💕

Ksidisusiagsjahayhaa right, I don't think we're escaping that house, we're gonna become ghosts together I think lmaooo

I watched all Twilight films for shits and giggles, but sometimes didn't even shit nor giggle cause??? Those TVD edits would make me feral if I was 17 again aisuaidgjahashgagaga. TB is an older show... bestie making me feel old once again, okaaaay

PLL started pretty well it was a different type of a teen show, but then went batshit crazy and I kinda admire them for being so unhinged, but also wanna murder them for wasting my time lol

Look at this!

THAT SPOILER WHAT AM I READING?!?!?!? Are you crazyyyyyyyyy Baek 😭😭😭😭 There's only O N E (1) TRUE PAIRING IN MY HEART AND YOU'RE NOT TAKING THEM AWAY FROM ME 🔫🔫🔫🔫. No but I really liked that lil snippet, angst and witchiness alright 💔

I like darker Sunmi a loooot, though I actually enjoyed all of her recent comebacks, she suits all concepts. I think some Dreamcatcher songs may fit miss villain Y/N, but I would have to dig. And how about Monster by Irene & Seulgi? Does Y/N consider herself a little monster? Alsooooo, I hope THIS villain never dies <333

Korean shows continue with their wacky ass camera angles and shitty sound, like HOW HARD IT IS TO DO THINGS PROPERLY. The way they ushered some groups off the stage and played pre-recorded version yet gave BTS so much time... I see. Like no hate to BTS, but it surely felt like a show for them and Armys...

Aaannnnnd my friend's friend might have fallen for Kai actually, whoops I'm so sorry girl 🤭

Lmaooooo the jealous is sick for real 😭

Confession: I have purchased some Mingi photocards so there's that... - DV 💖

hi hello!!!!

Lmao the choreographer posted about the SMN issue on his story and even commented 👁👄👁 I wonder if we hear anything about it, any apologies hmmm.

the choreographer posted more 👁👁 the way all the threads are being deleted after the choreographer spoke up <3 love to see it,,, wooyoung really said be humbled 😭😭 VATA LOOKED AT IT SO HE BETTER BE APOLOGIZING FHDHFB and bbt

screams wooyoung etl era but in a culinary school <3

I DO!!!! MF HOW CAN U HATE BLACK HAIR AND LONG???? UNGRATEFUL COMEON 😭😭😭 so glad that atiny said other wise <3 besties deserved a another fan call for that <33 NO LITERALLY I GET THAT BLACK HAIR IS SUPERIOR BUT LIKE WHAT HE WANTED TO DYE IT A DIFFERENT COLOUR 😭😭😭🤚🏼 #TEAMITCHYSCALP

Seonghwa content spam: Please I- ... I'M GONNA EAT HIM FIRST STOPPPP. DON'T MAKE ME CRI and this? Harvard business major/class clown Park Seonghwa //// We also got fox Woo today, so I win, I love my Foxyoung agenda

oh that harvard one makes me want to write a uni au for him so bad 😩 he goes to harvard and so does the yn but his reputation is like why’s he at this big of a school but his grades say otherwise 🔫🔫 WOOYOUNG’S RED HAIR IS SUCH A GOOD DECISION WHOEVER DID THAT THEIR BANK 📈📈📈 foxyoung ayo, furry?

Right so Hwa is a Want enthusiast, we need more of them, taste taste 💕

PARK SEONGHWA IN A RED SUIT PERFORMING WANT BEST FRIEND WE WILL PASS AWAY FHQNDHWKHDQKDHKQ

Ksidisusiagsjahayhaa right, I don't think we're escaping that house, we're gonna become ghosts together I think lmaooo

LMFAOOOO 😭😭😭 if he’s a ghost with u, stuck with u i think u won at life

DHDNDBDBDN TWILIGHT IS A GUILTY PLEASURE but some concepts?????? MAN WHEN IN THE FIRST MOVIE HE KEPT COVERING HIS NOSE BC SHE SMELT I WOULDVE MOVED SCHOOLS CHANGED NAMES BC THATS SO EMBARRASSING I WOILD NOT COME TO SCHOOL THE NEXT DAY 😭😭😭 jBDWNDBSN THE TB EP’S QUALITY REALLY GOT ME 📈📉📈📉📈

PLL started pretty well it was a different type of a teen show, but then went batshit crazy and I kinda admire them for being so unhinged, but also wanna murder them for wasting my time lol

i feel like it started well but they kept milking the plot and it turned out unhinged fbfbf LMFAOOOO DBANBDKW it was hard to find unhinged shows, but miss alex russo from wizards was my definition of unhinged <3 i have to tell u this but i wqs just listening to a podcast while answering this and they mentioned TB in it AND THERES A MIND READING IN IT???

Look at this!

STOPPPP I WAS HOPIMG SOMEONE WOULD PUT THEM TOGETHER I WAS GONMA MAKE AN RDIT WITH TAEMIN KAI KEY TAEYEON AND SEULGI BC THEYD FIT SO WELL THE EVIL 🤌🏼🤌🏼😮‍💨 GODBLESS THIS PERSON FOR CREATING ART

HELLO FBWNDHVDKC <3 idk if u kNow bUT SEONGHWA DOES NOT LIKE Y/N 😭😭😭 ONE TRUE PAIRING WHO???? HONGJOONG FINALLY GETTING A CHANCE??? OR SAN CONFESSING <33 GUESS WE’LL NEVER KNOW BUT WE ARE CLOSE TOO,,, unfortunately if the ending is unhappy, some (main characters) might die <3 mIGHT,,, misss yn so witchy, bestie does magic and fights but is always somehow the bad guy <3 y/n’s what if taemin’s lore was a person was,,,

ive only heard a snip of her recent cb but it sounded really good! honourable mention but chungha’s dark concepts 🤌🏼🤌🏼😮‍💨 DREAMCATCHERS WONDERLAND FITS AND SIYEON’S VOICE ESP ENTRANCING AND PARADISE (this ones insane good omg) y/n is not exactly a monster but evil in a sense theres so much sadness and situations yn’s dealt as a young person that it grew it into y/n being separated from the rest of the civilians,,, hence the darker, secretive, magic-ey and harshness to the personality <3 kind of like lana del ray’s young snsd beautiful STOP THATS SUCH A GOOD SONG????? WHAAAT BESTIE IM DBDBBD OBSESSED HOLDON ONN DBDBD also i think instrumentals work really well to describe y/n’s feelings! like those hobbit background musics

i do think, flame of love would be the title track of this fic + sayonara hotori + monologue + shadow + heaven + identity!!

id like to share this bc this is vv much like the hwa in the fic!! or mayhaps even duke

NO LITERALLY DBDHDH BRO THEY PAY U TO DO UR JOB WELL WHATS GOING ON 😭😭😭 HOW HARD IS IT WHY U SO LAZY 😭🤚🏼 omg literally!!! it was such a mess,, i mean tbh hasn’t it been like that since 2018, esp after mama, ever since sm and yg stopped attending it’s literally a concert for them a whole reason why i never watch them BUT ATEEZ

Aaannnnnd my friend's friend might have fallen for Kai actually, whoops I'm so sorry girl 🤭

MISS GIRLIE NEVER ESCAPING THE DEVIL ONCE UR INTRIGUED HE AINT EVER LEAVING U ALONE 😭😭😭

Lmaooooo the jealous is sick for real 😭

possessive men <<<< ateez being possessive men <3

Confession: I have purchased some Mingi photocards so there's that... - DV 💖

IS THIS A MINGI ERA I HEAR COMING???? HELLOOOO ?????

and uh???

BOBA A WHOLE BOBA

sorry what the fuck is this bestie

if u want a choi san bodyguard, breathe

ANON ANON ANONEBQNHDJWHDWK

BETSIE SOOHYUK SOONYUK FJWKDJWKDLW THIS IS SEONGHWAS FATHER

#✉️ : ask #dv 💖 anon

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iguessweallcrazyithinktho · 4 years

Text

loving you is the antidote

Summary:

Harry meet you at the gala and you both spent the whole night talking. He didn't get your number and he thought that was the end of you both, but later you both found your way back to each other while filming the Golden music video in italy.

Warning: fluff

Word count: 3.9k

Title: loving you is the antidote

Pairing: harry styles x reader

author note: been waiting to post this lol

Masterlist • requested closed. Don't send any!

Please don't post any of my content anywhere else without my permission. Comments and reblog welcome!

Here's how it started.

You woke up to your alarm blaring. Any other day you would hate that, but today you were quite grateful for it. You were going to the met gala for the first time in your career as a model. It was exciting.

You hopped out of the bed. Before you left your room you grabbed your phone before walking down the hallway to the kitchen.

It was 11 in the morning, birds were chirping and the sun was casting light on your kitchen. It felt nice against your skin as you pulled out your cereal and milk. You walked over to the island and took a seat and began to eat your breakfast while you scrolled through Instagram.

You didn't notice it at first, but you got a dm from someone you really adored. When you finally noticed, you gasped loudly

It was Harry Styles

You just couldn't believe it. The spoon in your hand, feel from your fingers as you pressed his contact. A message popped up and you began to read them.

Hi it's Harry styles. I just wanted to say I really admire what you do. I hope we can meet if you're going to the met gala tonight because I am. We can talk if you'll like, just really want to meet you. See you then hopefully. Love H.

The last bit made you smile a lot. You were really thinking about messaging him back, but you decided to surprise him until you got to the gala.

You finished up your breakfast with a racing heart. Harry styles out of all people liked what you did; he admired it. That made you shocked, at the same time giddy, also nervous.

After you finished your breakfast, you got up from the table, placing your bowl in the sink. As soon as you turned your phone began to ring. Walking back to the table, you picked it up seeing that it was your manager Sara.

Quickly you picked up. "Hi Sara." You practically screamed into the phone. You already regret it.

"Wow you're quite exciting. What happened? it's almost 9 in the morning, you're never this happy." Sara chuckled. You knew she was shaking her head.

"Sorry Sara. It's just… I got a message from someone special today."

"Ohh who?" She asked flirty. You laughed. "It was from harry styles. He wanted to see me at the met gala. He said he admired me." You began to beam as you remembered that message.

"Wow y/n lucky you." Sara laughed. "Well if you're going to see him at the gala then me and Jenny have to come over and get you ready."

"I'm ready to get ready." You nodded even though she couldn't see you. "Okay well I'll see you in about…" Sara looked down at her watch. "In about an hour. I'll see you till then ok?"

"Okay Sara." You said your good-byes to each other and ended the call. You exhaled after sitting your phone down on the kitchen counter. You were going to take a nice warm shower before Sara got here because it was always needed

You walked out of the kitchen, down the hall, to the bathroom. You inched over to the shower, turning the on knob to the hot water. While it got warm, You began to stare at yourself in the mirror for a few minutes, Harry styles still on your mind.

When you noticed you were daydreaming you quickly snapped out of it. "Gosh." You muttered to yourself. You turned to the shower seeing the glass steaming with fog. You began to strip from your pajamas until you were bare as the day you were born.

Slowly you got under the warm shower. Your muscles relaxing as a sigh passed your lips. Water trickled down your skin as you stood under the shower head. It felt amazing, and you'll love to stay in there forever, but you had things you had to do and that wasn't an option.

You began to wash your body. After about 5 minutes you were satisfied by how clean you were and turned off the shower head. You got out, right after wrapping a towel over your damp body, before you walked over to your vanity to begin your morning routine.

You bopped your head to Golden that was now blasting on your phone as you got yourself ready. You just loved Harry's angelic voice as he sang from his heart.

You were so in your element you didn't notice Time was moving quickly. The doorbell rang making you jump slightly. You got up out of your vanity chair and Walked to the door.

Opening it, you were met with Sara and your makeup artist and stylist. "How are you y/n?" Jeffrey, your makeup artist, asked as you let them all in. "Um…" you drew a long breath. "Pretty good."

You shut the door behind you before turning to look at them. "That's amazing. I heard the very famous Harry styles adores you." He gave you wiggly eyebrows as he sat his makeup case down. You began to blush at his knowing.

"Yes he does adore me. He wants to see me later which is pretty exciting." You clashed your hands together, smiling widely. Your stylist Maria laughed, "well take a seat. We're going to glam you up for this big day." You smiled at them and took a seat at your dining room table. "Work your magic."

*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*

two hours later they were all done. Your makeup was done, so was your hair. You decided on a white Versace dress to wear to the gala because it made you feel sexy and look sexy. Your team agreed on that last statement when you walked out of your bedroom with it on.

"Oh my gosh y/n you look amazing honey." Jeffrey said.

You twirled around, showing off the lace dress. "I love it, it looks so nice." Sara walked over to you. "Are you ready to go?" She smooths out the dress before looking at you.

"I'm more than ready." You said, beaming. "Alright then," Sara clashed her hands together. "Let's go then."

*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*

The drive to the gala didn't take long. You were so giddy to go. It was probably mostly because of Harry. As you pulled into the driveway of the art museum, Jeffrey made sure your makeup was perfect before you even stepped out of the car.

Sara stepped out first before a guard helped you out. You took a deep breath as you saw people everywhere. You put on a smile as the door was shut behind you.

Slowly, you walked up the steps, the photographer calling your name for you to look at their camera. You posed, giving them every angle.

You eventually reached the top of the stairs. Waiting up there was an interviewer wanting to interview you.

"Y/n, how are you?" She asked you, holding the microphone up to you. "I'm great. Really excited to be here." You looked at the interviewer, ready for her next question.

"What are you wearing tonight?"

"Um… I'm wearing versace. I've wanted to wear this dress forever. I'm very excited to be wearing it." You laughed at the end of the sentence before smiling.

"Well it's your first time to the gala, are you excited to see anyone?" She looked at you, waiting for your answer. You were dying to say Harry styles, but you know what kinda drama that could start. So you said some other people you were actually excited to see. "I'm excited to see Blake lively and Zendaya." You kinda lied.

The interviewer went with it and asked you a few more questions before she ended. Sara then led you to where the party was. You breathed a sigh of relief, but your heart was beating fast. Harry styles could be anywhere in the building. That excited you a lot. A waiter came over to you with a glass of wine. You took it right after you thinked him. You stood in the back and looked around at the sea of people. They were dressed beautifully from head to toe. You felt kinda shitty because your dress wasn't much compared to others. But a voice made you forget about the others around you.

"You look stunning."

You turned to your left to see the one and only harry. Your eyes met with his emerald eyes and it felt like you both were the only two in the building. A smile appeared on Harry's face as he walked closer to you. The pit in your stomach filled with butterflies the hurted, but in the most amazing way.

"How are darlin'?" Harry asked. "Um… I'm great." You were flustered and Harry noticed. "Don't worry, I'm not going to bite." He winked at you, making you giggle a little.

"Uh so you want to talk?" You asked him, sitting the champagne glass on the bar top that was behind you. Harry nodded lightly. "Yes, I would like to talk. Follow me."

Harry began to lead the way. You followed him, trying not to freak the hell out. Harry led you to a room where only a few people were. They were in their own little world so of course Harry brought you back there.

"Here sit beside me." Harry sat down in a chair and you sat in the one beside him. "So," Harry started, looking at you. "I just wanted to chat with you because you're pretty amazing."

You felt your face heat up at his words. "Thank you. You're pretty amazing yourself." Harry smiled, showing off his dimple. "Stopped, you're making me blush."

You chuckled at him. "No seriously you are. Your singing is unbelievably amazing and it just makes me forget about the world and smile." You looked off into the distance as you thought about those nights where you were belching lights up in your house by yourself.

"Thank you for making music." You turned back to Harry seeing him look at you with a smirk. "You're a doll. Well I'm going to say your modeling is awesome. I hope that doesn't sound weird but yeah it is."

“No it’s not. Thank you again.”

You and Harry kept talking. You both were flirting with each other like crazy. You would notice Harry's eyes falling to your lips as you talked. It made you flustered. You weren’t going to lie, you were doing the same thing.

You both didn’t notice that you had been talking for an hour until Sara came and told you that you unfortunately had to go. You looked back as Sara walked away.

“Well i gotta go.” you stood up and exhaled. “It was nice to meet you.” you turned to see harry getting up. “Same here.” he stood in front of you. His lips were pressed into a thin line as he looked into your eyes. You smiled slightly as shivers ran across your sink. Harry inched closer and closer to your lips, his eyes flickering to yours and to your lips. Both yours and Harry's hearts were racing.

Time stopped as Harry's lips touched yours. Your whole body tingled as he kissed you. The kiss was sweet, but had so much passion in it. You wanted to stay like this forever but you knew you couldn’t. You pulled away from Harry's lips, resting your forehead against yours.

“I have no words.” you muttered as you opened your eyes. Harry pulled away, looking at you. “Same. I really enjoyed this day with you, hopefully we meet again.” Harry said as he took his hand, brushing it over your cheek bone. “Well I should go before Sara comes and yells at me. Bye harry.”

You waved to him as you walked away, leaving his sight. Harry watched as you walked away. He knew you were going to be on his mind all week and he wouldn't have minded that.

Harry sat back down in the chair. A smile appeared on his face as he leaned back. You were something special.

-:-:-:-:

It's been a whole month since you've seen Harry. He was on your mind constantly. You loved every thing that happened on the night of the Met gala, but one thing you regret was not getting his number.

On the other side of the world, Harry was feeling the same way. You flooded his mind constantly. He fell asleep smiling as he thought about you. He wished he would've been smarter and got your number, but he couldn't go back and now he had to live with it.

Harry sat on his couch, his guitar tucked in between his arms and his thighs as he strummed away. He was coming up with some new music for his next album. The sound of his guitar filled Harry's ears. This song he was playing was about you and how close he was to getting you. He was really indulged in singing, so much when his phone rang it startled him.

He picked it up seeing that it was jeff. “Jeff?” Harry said. “Hi harry, so i was thinking we could do a music video for golden. What do you think?”

Harry suckedin his breath as he thought. “Um… I do like the sound of that. When do you want me to do it and where?”

“Um I was thinking today you can go to Italy and film like a 70s style music video. And I have the perfect girl for the video.” Jeff laughed on the other end of the phone. Harry smiled at Jeff's words, getting extremely curious. “Who is it?” Harry questioned. Jeff sucked in his breath. “Uh you have to go to italy to see.”

Harry shook his head laughing at jeff. “Okay you convinced. I’m going.” Harry got up and finished the call with jeff. After he hung up, Harry made his way to his bedroom to pack. He opened his closet and pulled out his suitcase. He began to stuff a few pairs of pants and trousers in his suitcase. When he had enough for a few days, he zipped up his suitcase and walked out of the room with it.

Harry wondered who Jeff was going to pair him with for the music video, but he’ll eventually see. Before Harry left he called Anne to tell her where he was going. She was still a huge Mama Bear. When he was finished with the call, he drove his way to the airport.

Watermelon sugar was blasting on the radio. Harry could help but belch out the song because you know it's his song. After about 15 minutes Harry arrived at the airport. He parked, got out of his car before making his way to the airport. After going through security he walked through the terminal. Of course while waiting to board some fans asked for a picture. He didn't mind so he took some pictures with a few. When Harry was finally in his seat by the window, he put in his airpods to listen to some 80s music and began to read a book.

2 hours and 30 minutes later Harry arrived in italy. Harry quickly unboarded so he wasn't seen. His taxi was already waiting for him when he exited the huge building. Harry put his bag in the trunk before getting into the back. The driver pulled away as soon as Harry buckled his seat belt. He was making his way to the hotel where Harry would be staying. While the driver was driving to his destination, Harry's eyes were outside of the window.

He loved italy a lot. It almost felt like his second home. He just felt so safe and welcome here.

"Alright we're here sir." The driver looked at Harry through the mirror. Harry looked at the guy, "okay, thank you." Harry said, reaching for his wallet. He tipped the guy a generous amount which earned a thanks. Harry smiled slightly at the guy before opening the door, taking his baggage and walking into the hotel.

Harry was quickly checked into a room. Once he got the key card he was off to the elevator. He was hoping to get in a nap before they filmed anything.

With his slinder, run clad fingers, Harry pressed the up button. It didn't take long for the door to open up. Harry walked in and sat down his luggage with an exhale. The door was about to shut 6 seconds later, but Harry heard a distant voice.

"Hold the door please."

And Harry did. He put his hand out and the door opened again. The voice that Harry heard now had a face to it. You walked into the elevator, smiling, not even aware who was beside you.

"Thank you for that. You pressed your floor before turning to see who it was. Your jaw practically dropped to the floor when you saw Harry.

"Harry!?" You were shocked. You didn't think you'd meet him again; yet here you both were in the same hotel.

"Y/n… How.. how are you?" Harry asked, stumbling to find his words. "I'm okay. I'm here to do a music video with someone." You said smiling.

"I'm doing a music video." Harry said. "Wait that's why Jeff was so giggly, it was you." Harry smiled causing you to do the same. "Well I guess our managers were thinking the right way." You laughed. "I'm happy I'm here. Especially know that you're as well."

Without hesitation Harry kissed you. God how you missed his lips. His tongue ran across your bottom lips before he kissed you zealously. You moaned a little as you cupped his cheeks deepening the kiss.

Unfortunately you both pulled away when the elevator dinged. You were breathless and so was harry. "This is my floor." You picked up your bag. "Um I'll see you later?" You said looking at Harry.

He nodded, "of course” you smiled at him as you walked out of the elevator. As soon as the door closed you squealed excitedly. Smiling, you walked down the hall to your suit that you were staying at. You struggled to get the key card in the slot from smiling so much but you eventually did and walked straight, tossing your bag to the ground. You fell back onto the bed with your arms wide open. You couldn’t stop smiling.

The italian sun outside of your window cascaded down on your body making you feel golden.

----

Harry was feeling the same. As soon as he entered his room he started doing his happy dance. He was more than happy, he was ecstatic. You did that to him. Harry calmed himself down before plopping down on his bed. He ran his hands over his hands trying to stop the smile on his face. He knew he couldn’t so he decided to sleep on it for an hour or so before he started filming.

Harry changed into some joggers and pulled off his shirt before getting comfy under the blanket. He fell asleep with a smile on his face(and also on his tummy hehe).

About an hour later, Harry woke up to his phone ringing. He adjusted from his sleep before reaching for his phone on the nightstand. “‘Ello?”

“Harry,” it was jeff. “ are you ready to film?” Harry sat up as soon as Jeff asked that. “Yeah. I just took a little nap.” he cleared his throat. “Okay be down stairs in 5 minutes, bye.” Jeff hung up before Harry could say bye, which Harry thought was rude.

He just pushed that out of his mind as he got out of the bed. He put on some shorts and a white button up shirt. Before he left the room he made sure his hair was perfect before grabbing his phone leaving the room.

Down the hall, near the elevator you were waiting for him. Harry of course smiled when he saw you because he didn't expect you to be waiting.

“Hi, what are you doing here waiting for me?” you walked up to him “well I ‘m scared of elevators.” you pouted your lip as you joked. Harry laid, “alright come on.”

He pressed the down button and waited for the elevator to open. “Wait how'd you get up to my floor then?” Harry asked, looking over at you. The way your eyes grew large as Harry caught you in your lie made him laugh.

The elevator opened and you and Harry walked in. you pressed the main floor and watched as the door closed. As you both went down, you couldn’t help looking over at harry. He was looking at the floors as they changed. You can see slight dimples in his cheek telling you he knew you were staring at him. You just chuckled softly before turning back, turning away, looking back forward.

The elevator soon came to a stop letting you and Harry off. Harry politely let you walk out first before he followed. Some crew that was helping film were waiting for you and harry to take you to the location you needed to go. You and Harry followed them outside before walking in the warm sun a block down to the filming location. When you arrived the director gave you and Harry simple instructions.

“Harry was up first driving the car and running. You watched as his curls blowing in the wind and how he made funny faces. You couldn't help but laugh to yourself at how adorable and hot he was.

you didn’t do much during your takes. so it was mostly you and Harry doing a little talking, giggling, and danced playfully. He was such a fun person to be around and you wish you could be with him Every day if it was possible.

After filming various takes the director called it a day. Your eyes were on the sky watching as the sun rays painted a golden picture on the sky. You didn't notice but Harry was looking at you with a smile.

Your skin glowed so nicely as the sun shined on you. A little smile played on your face making Harry chuckle quietly to himself.

He took it upon himself to walk over to you and wrap his arms around your waist. Of course you knew who it was - it made you smile.

"Hi Harry." You said leaning back. Harry looked at you as you looked up at him. "Hi y/n." Harry looked at the sky before speaking again. "You know something, when I left the gala I couldn't stop smiling. You were the first person that ever made me feel so free and so not famous. And when I forgot to ask I thought I lost my chances with you forever. My mind was going crazy; couldn't stop thinking about you for a second and how stupid I was to not get your number. But you know what?"

Harry looked at you. "What you mumbled. "None of that matters because I'm right here with you right now and there's nowhere I want to be."

You smiled softly at him. "I can say the same." You turned in Harry's arms. "I was going through a hard time before I met You. Not to be cliche or anything, but loving you is the antidote and I mean that."

Harry smiled before he cupped your cheek, kissing you tender and sweet.

The end

*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*✭˚･ﾟ✧*･ﾟ*

I love this. My longest fic too

best believe I got more coming

@captainamerica-is-bae

#harry styles #Harry styles x reader #Harry styles x black reader #Harry styles x y/n #harry styles x you #harry styles smut #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fluff #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x female reader

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borisbubbles · 3 years

Text

ESC2021 Preshow: 20. Estonia

Uku Suviste - “The lucky one”

Semi 2, #02

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Going through the motions of 2021′s shitty NF season, it was a given that the critical mass of the “2020 returnees” competing the selections in these would win them hands down.

So given how much i DISLIKED the offensively boring abomination “What love is”, and how PAINFULLY inevitable Uku’s victory in a decent Eesti Laul (um spoiler for NF corner?) seemed to be, It’s actually a shock I ended up liking Uku? But I do, lol and I’m not apologizing, sorry boos.

In fact, I was rooting for Uku to win EL as soon as I saw his performance in the semi. “The lucky one”, which suffered from Aggressive Autotune + Forgettable Melody (we need a name for this. I propose Roxen Syndrome?), is legit good live and harps back to the (admittedly better) “Pretty Little Liar”, and that’s good enough for me.

Of course, I am aware of the obvious ~*SOULLESS HIMBOT FROM THE DREAM FACTORY*~ label attached to this this entry (written by Uku and something called “Sharon Vaughn” are we certain this person isn’t just Kontopoulos in drag?), don’t worry. I rank him twentieth, not seventh.

Fortunately, Uku is a mandroid from the SAME sweatshop that gave us Lucie Jones a few years back - in other words omfg he’s barely functional. 😍 Droning robot turned incompetent DRAMA KING <333333 The amount of EFFORT that needs to be thrown in to keep a ~pretence of competence~ is the most tangible in the backing vocals, which trail Uku’s like a shadow and STILL his voicecracks come through at key intervals <3

😍😍😍😍😍

The pathos of Uku throwing in high votes he cannot sing and then his voice breaking over the strain each time, gets me, okay? He doesn’t need a crystal ball to show me, baby it’s clear that you don’t know him :SOB:. So dramatic, so inept, so unintetionally comedic, so Uku <3

In other news, this lockdown had better end soon because with each passing day I feel like I’m turning further into a cat lady.

ps: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KYXNeYXUmEQ&loop=0 😍😍😍

NF Corner - Eesti Laul 2021

Finally a decent Eesti Laul, lol. I wish I could say it was good, but it had one of the weirdest semi split’s I’ve ever seen. EL’s first Semi was without exaggeration the WORST show in the entire season, and the second was a contender for the BEST one across all NFs???? I suppose EXTREME Evil and EXTREME Good balance each other out in blistering adequacy?

Anyway, I’ll now proceed to ignore Koit and Egert and Karl Killing and Hans and all the other bad (non-Linna/non-Kéa) entries from semi 1, and proceed to an NF Corner composed ENTIRELY of semi 2 songs :-)

Jüri Pootsmann - “Magus Melanhoolia”

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It was between Sissi and Jüri for the Token Superfinalist Contender slot on this list, and Jüri is infinitely more notable. Sorry, Sis ur time (to win Eesti Laul?) will come once you figure out to write good music :(

Anyway, what can I even say about Jüri because lmfao what a baffling entry. Registered BARITONE JÜRI POOTSMANN coming back with a an experimental lounge jazz song that is song almost entirely in falsetto. 😍 The camera angles <3 the fact that this already INCREDEBLY short song includes 10 seconds of Jüri standing on the stage looking bored <3 what a fucking baffling entry, I have no opinions, only exclamations of surprise.

REDEL - “Tarttu”

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I HAAAATED “Tarttu” on first listen. 😂😂😂😂 but seriously though, this is downright epic. The UNPLUGGED Meiekündimees MADNESS of it all, now condenced into a equally nonsensical song that is basically like “X is a wooden town but NONE OF THEM ARE AS WOODEN TOWNY AS TARTTU. *incoherent kazoo noises*” 😍😍😍 Once got the chorus stuck in my head at the zoo as I was watching the penguins getting fed and it was one of the most bizarre synesthesic experiences I’ve ever had lmfao <3

Gram-of-Fun - “Lost in a dance”

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If you’re wondering what the sort of music I listen to Eurovision is like - this is it. INCREDIBLY good and addictive and EMOTIONALLY tangible 80s New Wave is my fucking jam, can we have entries like this in EVERY selection from here on out? WELL DONE Kristel... on composing this wonderful song, less so on the Kazka-esque vocals that caused it to tragically NQ in the semi. 🙄 Still, BRING THEM BACK (and restrict Kristel to a songwriter only role, plz.)

Gram-of-Fun were my fave, but because they NQ’d somebody else had to fill their shoes in the finale. I’ll now reveal who it was

Kadri Voorand - “Energy”

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IT WAS HARD DECIDING BETWEEN SUURED TÜDRÜKUD AND KADRI THOUGH. But given that Charlotte Perelli is guaranteed to appear in Sweden’s NF corner (um is she? :counts on fingers: Clara, Evas, Dotter... ehh sure I’m committed now I guess), it would be best NOT to post Dagmar & Kaire as they fucking clown her lol <3 But their song WAS pretty antiquated schlager...

Kadri otoh... absolutely breaks all records for me by delivering a unicorn: an entertaining stripped-down piano ballad. For the most part because she has incredible emotional delivery that serves personality on a fucking pyrotechnical level, like onn-stop “Loudmouthed Oaf Energy” in the form of a introspective jazz ballad <3 Can you imagine Estonia actually picking this? They could have come left-handside.

But will Uku do well? :o

Predicted Journey - Estonia

He won’t come top 10, if that’s what you mean by “well”.😂 If you mean “qualify for the Grand Final” then... potentially? Semi 2 is less of a crapshoot than the first semifinal however. At this stage, it’s pretty much “okay, so these twelve acts can qualify... but which ten will?”.

Fortunately for Uku, he is one of aforementionned twelve possible qualifiers. (the others are: san marino, czech rep, greece, moldova, iceland, serbia, albania, bulgaria, finland, switzerland and denmark). UNfortunately for Uku, he’s one of the candidates for the two NQ slots inside that group of twelve.

The problem with Estonia is that their entry is a televote-friendly ballad, stuck in a really televote-UNfriendly slot (#02), in a semi where the jury vote will very likely put them outside the top 10. If we add in a dark stage and Uku’s shaky vocals, they don’t look particularly secure.

However, I also think Estonia can qualify relatively easily because “televote-friendly ballad” is a unique niche inside that semi; the other ballads (Switzerland is NOT a ballad), won’t be getting many votes and Uku’s appeal as a handsome man with a dramatic song will make him stand out in spite of his spot in the running order, as LONG AS his vocal delivery (or that of the prerecorded backing vocals) remains adequate enough. If not, he’ll be swiftly forgotten and NQ.

Another thing that can cause Uku to qualify is if at least two others of the twelve underwhelm (my money for that would be on Albania, Denmark, San Marino and/or Czech Rep), making Uku the lucky one as he’ll ascend in the ensuing powercreep.

At any rate, it’s really difficult to gauge how well Uku would do since I haven’t really thought about the other BL qualifiers’ odds enough. His televote should be strong enough to avoid bottom 3, I think, and I think it’s safe to say he won’t come top five. Between those values, pffffew, who can possibly tell? I’m not burning my fingers on that.

Projected placements > Qualifier Tier: Borderline > Semifinal: 6th-14th (out of 17) > Grand Final: 17th-22nd (out of 26)

THE RANKING

01. 02. 03. 04. 05. 06. 07. 08. 09. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. ESTONIA - Uku Suviste - “The lucky one” 21. FINLAND - Blind Channel - “Dark side” 22. AZERBAIJAN - Efendi - “Mata Hari” 23. the NETHERLANDS - Jeangu Macrooy - “Birth of a new age” 24. CZECH REPUBLIC - Benny Christo - “Omaga” 25. DENMARK - Fyr og Flamme - “Øve os på hinanden” 26. SLOVENIA - Ana Soklič - “Amen” 27. SWITZERLAND - Gjon’s Tears - “Tout l’Univers” 28. ROMANIA - Roxen - “Amnesia” 29. SERBIA - Huricane - “Loco loco” 30. POLAND - Rafał - “The ride” 31. ISRAEL - Eden Alene - “Set me free” 32. GEORGIA - Tornike Kipiani - “You” 33. PORTUGAL - The Black Mamba - “Love is on my side” 34. SPAIN - Blas Cantó - “Voy a quedarme” 35. NORWAY - Tix - “Fallen Angel” 36. CYPRUS - Elena Tsagrinou - “El Diablo” 37. AUSTRIA - Vincent Bueno - “Amen” 38. NORTH MACEDONIA - Vasil - “Here I stand” 39. GERMANY - Jendrik - “I don’t feel hate”

#Eurovision #Eurovision 2021 #ESC2021 #ESC 2021 #Eurovision Song Contest #Estonia #Uku Suviste #The Lucky One

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misterbitches · 3 years

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I ship muren and li cheng bc i only saw it through gifs then i watched this episode cos i was like im only starting this show if they kiss im waiting and they did and it was nice and i got so anxious that i was about to fucking vomit. I really like them together. The top/bottom shit is dumb and i hope if they must mention it they all build a bridge and get over it so they can switch cos who gives a shit. I didnt realize how large they all are like most “tall” men on tv are lying. But bc that kid is so thin and tall and the other one (idk the stepbrother) is huge too. Li cheng is shorter than them both but more ~manly~ but still short so why doesnt he take a DICK UP HIS BUTT XD since that’s all that fucking matters and there’s only 2 genders and 2 eays to have sex lmao so nothing else otherwise ur screwed

Hd a terrible past couple of weeks personally and because i keep seeing my peopl eget murdered and things ripped from us ^_____^ anyway here’s Some libertatrian communist dumb bitch discoars so i’ll tag it:

keep in mind these are my opinions’”” when i engage in discourse. I am not the end all be all and I don’t need you to agree. There’s some shit I am non-negotiable on but thsi is just exchanging of information. Any authoratative tone I take on comes from my beliefs, my life, my experiences, and what I choose to cultivate as a person and an artist. I dont have control over your feelings, you do. If it hurts you then either tell me the issue and be PRECISE about it, understand that context matters which is why i type so much in engagement, and do not fucking lie or misconstrue my words. Do not call me western ever in your life either. I am a black-american. I have adhd and bc i am a black woman if ur automatically thinking im brolic i am accepting money in my paypal for ur wellbeing to get me to shut the fuck up.Thanks.

The stepbrothers storyline is stupid and lazy writing. I really want to counter people that say it’s written well and that it’s interesting because it isn’t. Even if it was illicit and fucked we can write a story out about this. Let’s rethink what they could have done shall we:

- become stepbrothers at about 16 and their parents mismanage the relationship and they fail in trying to get an integrated family together (this is what happened in the #iconic transit girls and that was fuckin’ weird but hey dude guess what we watched it and it was weird but not unethical and we know one is like 19 and the other is 21 and a girl so it’s like wow you avoided so much and handled their stepsister story very…….um lightly given the end lmao but it was there and people had AGENCY)

-OR you realize that freak is obsessed with him and then he realizes it and is like “bitch i swear to god” and in typical shtity trope BL fashion they can find a way from obsession, to loss and independence when you lose your obsession, to “love” if they choose

- have the fucked up shit but make it clear what the issues are and you literally cannot write your way out of it so do not try

But why can’t fucked up things be shown? Also this is realistic.

0. Well according to you but no one said that they can’t. So that’s on your interpretation of critique (that is, again, not bullying or harassment.) They can, i just gave plenty of scenarios in which it is affective and not just annoying to witness, trope-y, and frankly ridiculous and offensive. Sorry! They don’t do it well. You can come up with alternatives too. See #2 btw.

1. No it isn’t doing a good job of reflecting life because life has consequences. The exaggeration in drama doesn’t mean the arc shouldn’t be there. Almost always things that aren’t heavy with the message or meant to be sobering in a deep way are COMPELLING. The realism is the basis for art because we are human. This is not the way real humans act.

Someone said Tharn Type was mature and I had to laugh because no, no one acts that way and is “in love” if they act that way that means they fucking hate each other and they’re immature and frankly it’s just not that interesting for many of us to watch because the dramatization of the “realism” is fucking bonkers. That was such poor writing it is unbelievable and someone has the audacityt o say it’s how real adults act. Fucking murder me if I’m with someone for 7 years and we break up over a miscommunication and for some reason I am not as horny as my always horny boyfriend. The fuck? What kind of lives do you lead? Either you are not an adult or you are an adult who needs therapy.

I also hear the “realistic” argument but then people try and temper it with “but also it’s fiction.” What do you think fiction is? Why do you think filmmaking exists? Number one, it’s propaganda in the sense that you want others to buy into your presentation and see what you see. That means that the creators are telling people and influencing them WITH ART BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT IT IS about their feelings around a situation. That’s why it is imperative to be responsible as a filmmaker and artist and underline the deepness of creepiness if that’s what they want. If they want to relay that rape sometimes ok and psychos are crazy so they get boy (??!?!?!? BITCH?) then they achieved it with no innovative information. We know people get raped bc we are human beings and many of us live with that fear. You know, being the target demo and all. And bc BL loves that trope it’s rape fantasy peddled to young people and women. Just like shitty wattpad fics or NYT best sellers. Hooray, what now? Or are you trying to purport that this isn’t glorified fanfiction? Which it literally is

2. This is the issue with these shows. No one is saying that fucked up shit cannot be shown. There’s a film about a woman who is raped and she falls in love with her rapist (because he was masked but i think we find out later that she knows. Binoche is in it.) I have no desire for that film—i think it’s by a man and i extra dont care—but I hear it’s sort of powerful for many. I heard it was a good film. But the act itself is always eschewed and the conflict comes from how fucking ridiculous it is especially finding out that she knows. The power imbalance adn the possibility. They may not have handled it in a way I would have cared for but it was there.

There’s simply no imagination because these people do not care that much and aren’t great writers and filmmakers because they simply do not have to be. Sorry.

The industry doesn’t rely on the best they rely on efficiency (this is everywhere.) You can tell by the camera angles, the editing, the camera itself (idk if it is multicam but the flatness is typical soap flatness without the glowboxes to soften their faces.) Simple constant lighting. Now the surroundings are mostly beautiful. But even to some of the costumes. And those edits are abysmal, some of that camera work.

So with all that said even with the couple I extremely enjoy I see its (H4) faults. Add into that a lazily thrown together “shocking” love and if they are trying to get us to feel a type of way about its sexiness they fail. This is why movies like 50sog, 365 days, etc aren’t enjoyable to people because it’s fucking strange situations that they dont want to entangle or make enjoyable to viewers across the board. They know what people will take. It’s just that bitch what are we here for if even the sexiness isn’t there for ur stupid story.

At least with that teenager and 30 yr old man in MODC (which i do not love but i like them in theory if it wasnt totally repulsive to me and also if it was developed in a way that was good TO ME) they had their, er, “sex appeal” i talk about this as well the main couple in MODC to me, visually, was a miss. Not bc whatshisface was small and stuff but bc he was so sickly and they needed that to propel the story but it was just not appealing given how the story progressed. A missed opportunity in tying the two together besides making him look waif-y and sickly only to have the “did ur mom die in a car crash? No, cancer” type of move in not another teen movie. But the opposite. And not funny. Wayne tho????? GORL. Eggs. Cracked.

fandoms have a very warped sense of harrassment and discourse.

Most fandoms have harassers who are “protecting” the cast and crew who don’t need their protection (or maybe the crew does since they probably dont get paid well but why the fuck would anyone care about that lol) but very few have the people who have concerns or massive critique about the show are not going to be “bullying.”

If people are saying “if you like xyz, u suck” then sure it may suck for you to see but who fucking cares. Either talk to the person or don’t be friends with them. That is not bullying or harrassment. Things that are shitty get criticized. Fuck, things that aren’t shitty don’t. Get away from this idea of cancel culture and people misunderstanding the story. We have the ability to.

Think beyond your noses of personal preference. You don’t have to convince people of what you believe. Discussing it is good but critique is not bullying, harrassment, or hate. Neither is fucking roasting shit because even this shit I like (manner of death lets say) deserves it. Art is meant to be critiqued and if you dont fucking like the bullshit people make then say it. They know stupid stories like this are scandalous and they don’t give a shit in how to present them.

And guess what? You won’t like everybody. Many people can’t stand me i’m sure. Oh well. I mean frankly I don’t like that and I feel very unsettled when I don’t feel understood. That’s ok! I have to temper it. Sometimes calm myself down. I won’t get anything and everything I want. And you won’t like every opinion and sometimes it’s like “man am i a dummy?” But the part of growing up is fucking maanging that and beng honest about “bashing and harrassment” and “bullying” and growing up. Yuo can like what you want the “let people like what they want thing” is so fucking juvenile and THAT is not the real world. Which is probably why so many people feel that way, they dont want to live in the real world. Unfortunately, you do.

Think beyond our noses of personal preference and what we feel emotionally in conjunction with others. You don’t have to convince people of what you believe. And you can say things that you believe to be true but it doesn’t make them so or maybe it isn’t received that way to people. And many times we learn new things in the discussions “oh shit i didn’t see it that way” right? Discussing it is good but critique is not bullying, harrassment, or hate. Neither is fucking roasting shit because even this shit I like (manner of death lets say) deserves it. Art is meant to be critiqued and if you dont fucking like the bullshit people make then say it. They know stupid stories like this are scandalous and they don’t give a shit in how to present them. Usually the “opposition” in these situations aren’t the popular beliefs that permeate through society. Trust me lmao

Antiblackness

Antiblackness is a thing. It permeates everywhere. It permeates in this genre and it permeates in fandom. Get it the fuck together. Also do not conflate cultural relativism with being repsectful. They are not barbarians, they are smart human beings either making work or deciding to. We all have diff cultures but we have fucking sense in what is respectful and not. And if we don’t we fucking learn. You cannot excuse things and say “oh culture” when you have 0 idea of that culture or actual people who are radical etc and are fighting against it. Additionally the word westerner is an ignorant term when referring to people in the US or UK who are black. Because we are not. We extend sympathy to other groups and empathy since we know so there is no inherent power imbalance between a black viewer and their subject. Don’t suggest that because it’s wrong and ahistorical and contextless.

FIRST the fallacy of representation as freedom makes people fucking complacent, individualistic, and doesn’t let them think critically. Consumption and discourse around consumption is not helping material conditions of the marginalized communities in your home, the black ones who are ignored, those intersectionalized in these communities. Groups talk about art and what it means for them outside of just what we see and because we also don’t have access to a bunch of Thai reviews or what movements or going on we are less likely to know if we don’t FUCKING SEARCH for it. Because art is constant...which leads me to....

Representation is difficult. It matters and it doesn’t.

Tthese shows are not meant to overturn the LGBTQ+ community.

There are queer filmmakers and artists in these countries. Deep illustrious film careers or even TV that is moving and deliberate. We can even see it with the dude from “your name engraved” in their short series he was in beforehand. BL is no wa pejorative because it is simply not “qu**r” storytelling whatever that means. But know it has always existed everywhere and there are also out artists or radical artists in all these countries who do no respect mediums that are cash-grabs and poorly made.

ex: As much as “Like in the Movies” sort of isnt for me and is a bit hamfisted you can tell how much love goes into that. Love of the characters, acting, and message. Yes it’s cringey to see some of the lines (like very tbh subtlety wasnt exactly their strong suit) and yea naming them after lenin and marx is just 0ihgoaudgijposkagjihou BUT GUESS WHAT? THEY FUCKING DID IT. THEY TRIED. And class was a large component as well bc u cant fuckin ignore it. The show is aware of the machinations in its world as a show but also in the philippines and for a fuckin reason. And duatarte? Loooooooool so like yea not so sure bl makes him love his ppl but the show isnt trying to do that

It’s not a transgressive genre and it has no reason to be. No ethical anything under the way we live it’s just trying your fucking best to be. That’s it. They serve societal ills and capital’s purposes. Which is fine but it is not revolutionary.

These countries in SEA or even SA do not have as big budget for even mainstream dramas—though things are changing and that’s bc REVENUE like revenue from kpop is fucking huge for SK and again so much about that is bc of what happened in their history from japanese imperialism to WWII to the US—so for “queer” stuff it is sort of now important to make that an export and it sure is one. Not only globally or to the west but a lot of these places make their money within asia (duh!) outside of their countries. OBVIOUSLY. so BL is a way to output and gain money. The thing is, it doesnt seem to be put back into the industry at all. For people in all these countries to make works that aren’t for mainstream or wont reach as many people there’s a difference between trying and just shoving shit in your face and going here it’s gay you like it right? But dont antagonize the inherent patriarchal nature of BL.

Another thing: did you guys know thailand was never colonized? You should look it up. There’s little hints of things in ITSAY to represent french influence still. Isnt that fascinating? Find out why. It’s certainly interesting that the representation, though damaging and dubious many times and also incorrect like any media, is huge in asia and this isnt a commodity here (the US) exactly. A lot of that has to do with colonial ideas of gender of which I am sure. But listen………lmao

Sometimes people dont give a shit. And it very much shows. Here is the thing once again. GOOD TRANSGRESSIVE WORK exists.

Een within the capitalist Bs paradigm or you can see people trying (I can sort of applaud parts of lovely writer) also queer media has always existed everywhere the reason you don’t know about it is because it gets takena nd commodified into a mainstream product. We hvae little incentive, particularly if we are not fans of cinema or art in gen, to search fror others when the output is right here. Being dictated by others and the state and who will give you money. No longer an effort of a cast and crew who want to convey things. But google [any country] independent cinema, radical cinema, queer radical cinema, or even retrospectives on the cinema and rethinking what is queer and radical in film. What if we took that, diluted it, got rid of the creators who put themselves through all the work, ignroe al the nuances and do……………….two actors who are conventionally attractive with no chemistry making out.

It’s the same here lets say daniel kaluuya winning the oscar for the film about the BPP. I heard it was okay and not too offensive but it still isnt’ enough. It still isn’t like hwood isn’t trash, nnati black, misogynistic towards BW and women, and all that other shit. It was pushy but it can’t be enough where we are. Black KKKlansmen i think won an oscar, by circumstance i fuckin hate these award shows they mean nothing, and i like the film a lot but he has his misogynoir still resting in his films even if it is poignant. And it was a film that honestly wasn’t really made for black people. And should all art be a response to direct trauma or trying to make ourselves palatable when we’re just human?

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ and it’s importance (capitalism) but also sorta individual responsibility

Considering a lot of these actors are rich and then just dip that’s another problem. Mainstream isn’t what sustains marginalized art ever. It doesn’t change in the vast ways we think it does. What changes is the people of these groups pushing, fighting, forcing and then capitalism trying to make it work under capitalism. It will not. It cannot.

This is why artists and labels often don’t mix or you see people like Sonic Youth doing whatever they want and pissing off their label but making them give them money. Same with Nirvana. Vince Staples. The thing is they can fight and make good shit but what capitalism helps people….not care? They don’t respect the audience? We’re getting those returns on poor executed product placement, lighting, editing, framing, fucking acting. And you surewon’t see mixed black asians in these shows. WHY R U is the oNLY one i have seen it in and he just disappears (but that was pretty cool.) so who the fuck is this representing? And before you start: asian countries are not homogenous the way we believe them to be. There are marginalized communities outside of even mixed people that are harmed. So you can skrrt cause on that one: you’re wrong buddy. But it gives us the IDEA of a paradise which is what they NEED.With representation and visibility comes consequence and responsibility as artists. What it allows them to do is coast and not think complexly because why should they; it’s mostly the fantasies of some older woman who probably has money and much less interaction with the world. It’s bonkers. And what that allows even further is for them to say YOU ARE THE THING THAT YOU CONSUME and the THING THAT YOU CONSUME IS YOURS. It is not, it is not your identity, form a close bond but figure it the fuck out. Especially for adults who are hellbent on twisting their minds into pretzels and can’t acknowledge what’s just laziness in art and not giving a fucking shit. Truly.

There’s damage that has been done from Parasite as he was supported by CJE&M and the bullshit obsession america had and eveyrone’s poor interpretation of it if they are rich. BJH is a socialist and he is a filmmaker. He has made films that are outstanding and cost a lot of money. But now a fear for indie filmmakers is just not being able to raise that much or have that much attention. Getting funding that helps them instead of expecting the Next Big Thing that is a fad because capitalism is trash. Yes this funneling of money is absolutely harmful to us artists. Even buying in is strategic. Additionally, that film is probs one of the most radical films to have that wide release and accolade (unlike “Sorry to Bother You” which i have a lot of thoughts about. One being that asian exports are acceptable but black ones are not. This is an overall art critique and global media critique. Blackness is removed, not respected.) However, filmmaking isn’t green, it can’t be socialist, and it’s a lot of work. They used tons and tons and TONS of water to do a huge beautiful feat but we still know there is a cost. We have to figure that out because it shouldn’t be. It doesn’t go back into the crew’s pockets the way it should and the work becomes that of the director’s and actors solely. It’s fucking hard. We have to do our part but it doesn’t mean we are doing it perfectly. We just have to try to do better. So does BJH cos he needs to not be a misogynist but anyways i digress.

additionally and this is something some users fail to understand: people in the media sphere generally have fucking money. I went to film school that was international with super fucking rich kids. Taiwanese kids, kids from south asia, china, thailand. They had money. No not upper middle class money, not “rich” money, not some paltry 1m that’s chump change. Fucking money. Fucking RICH-RICH. MILLIONAIRES. BILLIONAIRES. WHICH IS DISGUSTING MIGHT I ADD. The domestic people didn’t have the money for school (in the UK) and i am in a massive amount of debt like every other black student that went there. You do not understand how much money is needed to survive so people who turn to these crew positions even casting etc need this fucking money usually. OKAY. A lot of the people that do well in these dumb shows or even on a larger scale HAVE MONEY. The reason these industries are small and struggling is because of lack of people and lack of resources to independent shit because oh gee it takes money to make things.

Why should I try? Well you don’t have to really if you have money or a name. Yet...

We can tell when like those Tik Tok shows or DCOMs dont give a shit (anymore.) You know how frustrated we get when content for young people is garbage? Well, see, BL is literally that under that system. Occasionally we will get something good now but there is virtually no need in any sector in the world at this point to truly figure out how to make it better and what to do to enhance artistic literacy, outreach, teaching people new things, getting people from these communities there and having true realistic says. Art and culture is IMPERATIVE TO WORLD LIBERATION but not when it is so stiffly trying to bend to capital’s idea of progressiveness. No. Neoliberalism. No.

That’s why in a way ITSAY is a huge feat; it takes from films etc and they clearly had money (the actors rae rich too which….lmaooooo j’aime pas) but it was a respected fucking script, acting was important, blocking, framing. There’s very little to critique as a visual medium for that because I understand what they are trying to do, their market is going to be mostly young girls, but they RESPECT THE FUCKING AUDIENCE. And guess what guys? You can make money from it!!!! WOAH! Since that may be the only goal which is disgusting and repulsive.

HOWEVER AND THIS IS WHAT IS SAD: itsay is an ex of a great show however knowing the actors backgrounds and the pseudo trouble it stirred when they weren’t supporting people protesting against the coup in the summer it really put a damper on my enjoyment. And this is how we can see that:

a) it’s honestly just a show and a good one but b) now what?

These kids (actors, who are like idk 19? 20?) are rich and not saying anything while countless actors, who were filming, did. Even tul who has $$$$ and the thing is the protesting against the coup legitimately attacks the rich. As it should. The protests going on were cries for help, against a dictatorship and fucking coup, asking people to get fucking help for covid, having kids be able to live. There’s a mini on VICE about this and it probably doesnt go too in depth but there’s a kid in there who talks about his friends getting into drugs and how he just wants to make music, have fun, skateboard. And it’s harrowing to see. This is a direct example of what these things do and don’t do. Yea we know a good show is here, we know growing up and slice of life, we know this is a bit of escapism and idealism but the idealism is reflected in the way these actors also choose to live their lives. So what progress? To who? For who? How is this helping me? What purpose does it serve? I say ITSAY serves its purpose as a piece and a glimpse into possibility of growing up but i do not say it antagonizes a broader issue that needs to be relevant in some sense but simply is not. It’s very singleminded and, well, it’s sort of like “besides my sexuality, what do i have to worry about?” But for real humans like....a lot. I do not respect their decision at all.

Why can’t we do our jobs and make something decent and respect our audience? No time, gotta make that sweet sweet sweet cash baybee. Look how progressive we are! Don’t look at history and material conditions. Thanks in advance, management.

History 4 does not have that respect. Many of these shows do not. Sometimes we hit good, sometimes we don’t. But in the end we cannot settle. And I won’t. If I am critiquing something I will not be shy and if I am meant to enjoy something as escapism then these shows NEED to highlight that and it’s rare sometimes (the best twins is a good reminder like that show is bad but man do i Brain Empty when i turn it on and i like that and there’s not much in it that makes me want to kill myself from annoyance but there are transphobic jokes i dont love however the whole show is a comedy about this dude’s crazy homophobic sister and she is constantly positioned as wrong and they talk about the aforementioned trans women as the actor was in drag. Interesting that they can manage that, huh?)

Oh btw.....taiwan has a very complicated history but ignore all the bad stuff it’s good now you can kinda sorta get married and stuff. KMT? You know how i learned that? I care about human beings and read about it lmao. I am not Taiwanese and look at that. So now I have historical and DIALECTICAL~**~*~****~*~*~ context so i can judge it as an artist, a black woman from america, and from the knowledge i have to pick up on their history to see if this fits into a broader picture besides the micro-one of sexuality on an individualized level. And this is kinda where it comes full circle: these shows are not you, you are not them, they do not exist in a vacuum because nothing does. The failure to critique now means continuing on as it has and it will still do so. History and time are not linear in the sense we think it is. Someitmes things are better, sometimes things feel more austere. We are not living under liberation though and these shows are not going to do so. So they are not US nor are they for a nebulous “us” of which the groups are all fractured and have diff opinions anyway (my opinion as a black american is going to vary from an asian woman’s say and that could really clash and i do not feel solidarity with all those in every community i am for several reasons.)

Final thots that have taken up my time and the only thing i actually wanted to write but got distracted:

Anyway my dissertation is that I ilke Muren and LiCheng a lot a lot and i like how cute they are and how truly dumb li cheng is. This is an example of mostly good writing, decent actors, nice chemistry, and sort of a calmness to them. And I super enjoy how Muren is pretty forward with LC in the sense that being together is like very important to truly be together. When he was like “no i didnt forget!” Or when LC asked him something in the office I forget it was 6 am and again i almost threw up and muren nodded and then LC leaned on him. Very cute. I want more of them tho i may have to skip that othre couple (the cameo the ones from MODC) but omfg the younger one HIS HAIR GREW SO MUCH HE LOOKS SO MATURE AND CUTE OMFGIJ0HUG9SAOGIJPKOAGJSIOHUAGIJP hahhaha the one good thing i will say about THEM.idk how old the actor is i figure he was young idk it makes me happy to see him he’s very cute. I hope he’s in something i can watch and not gag at. Is he hot? Who knows but he is a cutie!!

Anyway muren and lc have a good thing going it’s nice to watch ho\pe they dont fuck it up but im truly a sucker for some true finds 2 luvas i think some user on her\e was like i’m not a fan of friends ot lovers bc it doesn’t seem like they’re actually friends and maybe they were referring to this show idk. But it made me think and it was a very good observation. So i think they are friends and also luvrs <3

#history 4 #history 4: close to you #i told sunset about you #a thot #tharntype #lovely writer #bl fandom #idk #lol #long

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iwantitiwriteit · 4 years

Text

Love Lockdown - Part 4

Begin Again

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Summary: You and Chris have your first serious conversation after being apart for the first few weeks of lockdown.

Warnings: Angst, Pandemic backdrop, Profanity, dash of Fluff, sprinkle of Sexual suggestiveness

Notes: Another In My Feelings Monday™ yesterday! Hopefully there’ll be more musings as the weeks go on, but I loved the whimsy the mindset added to me day! 🥰 This part y’all! Whew! Tried to get as much angsty good tension in there as I could muster-- I won’t rest until we’re all bawling lol Read the previous part here!

Let it be known, that for a professional writer, you were shit with words.

Though you were a force with pen to paper, fingertips to keyboard, and a mirage of emotions… maybe some wine, when it came to verbal expression, you were more tongue-tied than a motherfu—

“What do you mean?”

Your mouth is dry as it opens and closes like a fish out of water, a lame attempt at finding the words to answer Chris’ valid question.

“Baby, please talk to me. What do you mean ‘you don’t wanna do this… with me’?”

His heart is on the fritz. His mind is everywhere and nowhere. Chris decides to focus on what he sees, what is real, like that will do him any better. Seeing the soft lines of your face tensed into sharp, anguished angles and you’re hugging yourself so tightly only makes him want to replace your arms with his.

To Chris, you’ve never seemed to need his help, though. You seemed strong, self-sufficient, self-healing, even. He loved and admired that about you. How you didn’t need, but just wanted him around. But if he thought too hard about it, it scared him. He wanted you to want him as much as he wanted you. He’s never really been sure of how much you wanted him. You also seemed to struggle with saying how you felt. The one thing he was probably too good at. The one thing he could help you with.

But he’s the one who’s got the two of you thousands of miles away from each other. Now, you’re having this make or break your relationship discussion over FaceTime. He doesn’t get to do that. He doesn’t get to jump in. Might not be the worst thing in the world, considering all his efforts of jumping to “make things right” in the past few months have landed you both in your current situation.

His options are limited now. It feels like his hands are tied behind his back, and you’ve got your finger on his chest. Will you use the slightest force to push him away forever, or open your palms and bring him closer to you?

Chris is trying his best to maintain composure, but his voice is giving him away as he asks one last time, ‘what do you mean?’.

You, too, are trying to remain composed.

You’re not entirely sure what you meant, but felt compelled to say it. You’re trying to be vulnerable and let your heart speak for once, so aware of the discomfort in your chest that your arms are crossed tightly over it. You weren’t one to let your heart move on it’s on volition, finding it smarter and more self-preserving to let your brain take the wheel. Your aversion mostly coming from what it makes you look like. Take your state at this moment: lip quivering, throat constricting, eyes burning, and rimming with tears. On the verge of being a mess.

You always hated when people cried in uncomfortable situations. “It’s a cheap shot,” you’d say, feeling like it wasn’t fair to make the other person feel bad. You refuse to cry. Instead, you screw your eyes shut, and take a few deep breaths. There’s an intense white noise in your head keeping you from thinking straight. Maybe taking a moment will give you some clarity.

After a few seconds, your senses come back to the room. You hear the rustling of wind outside the window in front of you, the hum of the A/C, and Chris shuffling on his end of this caustic call. You can’t bring yourself to open your eyes just yet, but you found your bearings enough to speak.

“Ok…” Your eyes finally meet Chris’ eyes through the camera. He’s poorly holding back his pain in those ocean blue eyes of his. You consider backtracking, engaging your filter. You could ease his mind like always, telling him “never mind” or “it’s nothing”. You could just let him speak like always. He’s always been better with his words. You loved and admired that about him.

He always seems to know how to poetically and intellectually verbalize exactly how he feels, be it about a movie he’d seen, a tweet he read, a song he heard, a woman he loved. A woman he probably was tired of her tongue-tied bullshit. Not that you weren’t a little exhausted from his B.S. You could just let him break up with you, say “ok”, and go your separate ways. A nice, clean break. The hell it would be. You’d be wrecked, you just know it.

But your sister’s words from a moment ago ring in your head:

It’s good to feel. It’s okay to show it sometimes, too. Especially with the ones who showed and proved they won’t judge you for it.

Chris has never judged you. Maybe it’ll be ok to lose composure just a little, halt your filter for just a second or two.

“Chris, I don’t wanna do this with you— this acting like strangers, acting like nothing’s wrong. This hurting each other, but still holding on to each other? I don’t wanna do that to you. I don’t want to hurt you. I’m sorry that I hurt you. That I let contempt build up until I explode instead of just talking to you about what I was feeling. I understand if—“ you take a breath to keep calm and keep your emotive stride, “I know what you wanted to talk about, and I understand.”

“What do you think I wanna talk about?”

“I—” your filter kicks back in as you hold back your thoughts. Despite your front, you hadn’t fully come terms with it. Saying it would make it real, and you weren’t ready for that.

“You thought what?” His tone was slightly accusatory, causing you to cover your face with your hands, engulfing you in embarrassment over your doubts as you realize that ending your relationship was not what Chris wanted to do. You let out a baited breath, as you drop your hands. You had nothing to say, casting your eyes down to your twirling thumbs in your lap.

Chris’ eyes grow ever so slightly wider as his jaw relaxes and lips form into the slightest frown. “I would… I would never…” he stutters out. Chris goes to bring his hand down his face, a subconscious tick for when he’s exasperated, but stops short with the thought in his mind of germs and viruses and fucking Corona. He’s settled on a sigh, it all settling in the difficulty of everything in life at the moment. It’s exhausting.

You’re hurting. He’s hurting. It feels like a never ending cycle. But he’s determined to break the cycle.

“Do you remember what I said that night in my kitchen? Back in December?” All you could respond with was a nod, your eyes still fixated on your lap. December’s events still left a little bit of a bad taste in your mouth, but with each passing day you were sure you were getting over it. “Well, I fucking meant it.” Slowly, you raise your head to your screen. Chris looks like a wounded puppy that’s still game to play.

“And I should be the one apologizing. Obviously I haven't been doing the best job of living up to my words from that night. I’m sorry.” Then you couldn’t help it. But what would one tear hurt? Chris clocked the tiny droplet streaking your glowing cheeks. His soft smile at it was so small and so brief before he continued. “I never meant to hurt you with my ignorance. But I did, and I’m doing the work and the reading to be better. What happened when you were here should’ve never happened, but I made it worse by not listening to you, really listening to you, and—“

“My love,” your voice stops Chris mid-ramble. That pet name. He hasn’t heard it from you in a long time. Too long, in fact. Hearing it now almost makes his heart burst. “You’ve got to stop beating yourselves up about it.”

“But aren’t you mad?” He was projecting.

“Mad about what happened? Yeah, kinda. Mad at you? No… not anymore. I stopped being mad as soon as you did listen to me, really listen to me,” you echo his words. A small smile graces your lips, and you’re able to coax one onto his. For a moment it’s sweet. You then notice his smile disappear as the gears in his head start to overwork again.

“But then I did it again! With the shitty shit with my shitty friends. I’m sorry for my shitty friends.”

“I feel sorry for them too,” you joke with a tentative smirk.

Chris laughs, appreciating that you’re able to find humor in any moment. His chest feels a little lighter now. He thinks back to your earlier statement. “I agree; I don’t wanna do this. Cos it just feels like I’ll lose you, and I don’t want that. I want you. For as long as you’ll have me. Can you forgive me for all the stupid shit I’ve done in past few months?”

“As long as you can pardon my behavior as well.”

“Of course. I love you.”

“I love you,” you stress to him.

Chris places his arms on the table, leaning into the camera, his gorgeous face taking up more of your screen. He’s got a sort of glossed over look in his eyes as he says matter-of-fact-ly, “I wish I could kiss you right now.” There’s no suggestiveness, just a statement of a very pure desire. Yet, your face heats up at his words. You take a quick glance down and bite your bottom lip to hide your smile.

“It’s too bad you can’t.”

“I know, I know. That’s my own fault.”

“Not gonna fight you on that.” you lightheartedly say. At least you meant it that way. Although he should’ve expected it and is usually a good sport with digs, it still… stings. He grimaces and you know that it’s just too soon.

“But maybe…” your low, sultry tone brings his attention back to you, “you could…” you purr slowly and suggestively as you lean into your computer while pouting your lip.

Chris raises his brows as his jaw slacks. “Yeah…?”

Your mischievous smile is met with his eager one. “KISS ME THROUGH THE PHONE?!” You belt out the familiar melody, shocking Chris to point that he jumps a little in his seat. You’re in stitches, clutching your chest. You hadn’t laughed this hard in a while. You get a good belly laugh out of Chris as well, his head tilted back, the glorious sound filling your ears as the sight of all 32 of his teeth please your eyes. His spirits are instantly lifted. You love that you can make him laugh like that, it satisfies a part of your soul you were unaware of.

The two of you come down some from your laughing fit. “Cute… real cute,” sarcasm never more evident in Chris’ voice.

“Hahaha you thought you were gonna get a show! Nope, buddy… not this time.”

There’s a quick quirk of his brows at the possibility of him getting to see you in all of your hot, sexy, naked glory. His mind gets lost in the last time he had you like that: your back arched, your nails dug into his back, your legs—

“Ahem! Eyes up here dude!”

“Oh my g— I’m—“

“You’re forgiven, you’re only human,” you smile at him coyly.

Silence settles around you, as you steal glances and smiles at one another through your screens. The air is free of pleas and sighs and stupidity and jokes. Hopefulness moves in for the first time in weeks, evicting the uneasiness that had made a home out of the deepening space between you two. You just watched each other, adoringly and longingly, watching your love for each other begin again.

Part 5

#chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fan fiction #chris evans imagine #chris evans one shot #chris evans angst #chris evans x reader #chris evans x you #chris evans x black reader #chris evans x y/n #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x poc!reader #love lockdown series

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firemblem-fics · 4 years

Text

Smitten Kitten [3]

one | two | three | four | finale

-> Pairing: Felix x Female!Reader | Hybrid!Au (mostly platonic idk)

-> Words: 1.6k

-> Warnings: Cursing, A Literal Karen, Mentions of Abuse (not too in depth, but still there), Manipulation, a Slightly Suggestive Conversation

-> Genre: Fluff, Crack, Some Angst

-> Summary: You never wanted to be involved with hybrids. They were risky and had too many rules for you. But what will you do when a little black and white cat that you take in turns out to be the very thing you steered clear of?

-> A/N: so I made two FE3H oc’s and also have gotten back into drawing so I was wondering ... how would y’all feel if I wrote and also posted some of my drawings and stuff here? it would give y’all more content and I’d probably be inclined to post more often lol anyways enjoy

“This is fucking stupid-”

“Stupid? Felix, you lied to me.”

You were livid. First this fuck-ass cat shows up in your life, worms his way into your heart even though you swore you wouldn’t get a hybrid, and then brings all kinds of trouble with him. If you weren’t already so attached to him, you’d just let the people- Doug and Karen- take him. But you couldn’t. You cared too much.

“It’s not that big of a deal.”

“It’s a huge deal! You told me that they didn’t want you, not that you ran away. Do you know how this can affect me keeping you? They can take me to court or something and get you back.”

“But you signed the papers, I’m yours.”

Your heart fluttered, but you ignored it. “You’re mine, but you also belong to these people. I can’t just take you from them, but I can’t let you go back to them if they were that bad to you- were they even bad? Or did you just not like them? Did you lie to me about that too?”

Felix’s eyebrows furrowed. “I don’t like them because they were bad. Look at ‘em. They don’t love anything except for the gold around their necks, especially not me. I was literally put in cat shows to earn money. If I ever got below first place, they’d…”

He shuddered and sat down on the edge of your bed. You leaned against the door, arms crossed. From the other room you heard talking. Ashe probably saw your front door open and came to investigate.

Felix couldn’t look you in the eyes. You looked so hurt. Not even angry- just hurt. “Please don’t make me go back.”

You sighed and dropped your arms. “I don’t want you to go back, Fe. But I- I don’t know what else to do. They’ve obviously got more money and if they take me to court they’ll win for being ‘better equipped’ to care for you.”

“But they’re not.” His voice was growing desperate. ��You are. What if- what if we can prove the center that you’re better than them? Courts don’t deal with Hybrid ownership, the facilities do. Nancy does.”

At that moment, the door creaked open. Two red ears appeared first, then a mop of red hair.

Sylvain grinned and walked in, closing the door and throwing a wink Felix’s way. The cat bristled.

“Give me your phone.”

“I’m not cheating, I swear.”

“We’re not- fuck you, give me your phone, Sylvain.”

The dog practically whimpered and handed over the phone. Felix had a Cheshire grin as he unlocked it. Typical Sylvain to not have a password despite all the dumb shit on the phone. You tapped your foot impatiently, anxious for Ashe who kept the two other people occupied.

“So, what are you planning?”

“I’ll go back with them, but I’ll keep this phone. I’ll- I’ll take those audio messages and send videos and shit when I can. I’ll just have to be careful.” This was the most Felix had ever talked to anyone. His voice was shaky, despite trying to desperately hide it.

“Absolutely not. Felix, you're not going with them! Who knows what they’ll do-“

“I think me dealing with their shit for a few weeks will be worth it if I get to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Your eyes widened and so did Felix’s. He flushed a bright red after realizing what he said. Sylvain cracked up.

“I- I mean, as an owner. You don’t do those things, that’s all. I just-“

“Nah, nah, it’s alright, you little smitten kitten~” Sylvain still smiled. “We catch your drift.”

Felix huffed. “There’s no drift to catch! Fucking drop it! Drop the drift!”

He stood up and yanked the door open, scaring the shit out of Ashe. You followed him quickly, grabbing onto his sleeve as Sylvain went back to Ashe’s side.

“You don’t have to do this, we can find another way.” You whispered. Felix could clearly see your absolute distress at letting him leave.

He held your gaze and let out a sigh. “I’ll be okay. You and Ashe just keep a lookout for my messages.”

With that, Felix tugged his arm out of your grasp and walked to Doug and Karen. He didn’t say anything, just looked down at the ground, his head lowered.

Submission.

That wasn’t the Felix you had come to know. Felix was loud and didn’t take shit from anyone. To see him suddenly reduced to something resembling a kicked puppy- the irony- was borderline heartbreaking.

You couldn’t help but tear up as the door closed. Sylvain whimpered. Ashe, who was silent and confused the whole time, whipped around to you.

“What the fuck is going on?” He seethed. “You didn’t even put up a fight-“

“Take a chill pill, Ashie.” Sylvain went behind Ashe and began to massage his shoulders. Ashe slapped his hands away. “We’ve got a plan.”

“A plan? Y/N, listen, you’re not Claude. You’re not Yuri. Your little plans never work the way they should.”

“Just give this one a chance!” You practically pleaded. “Felix has Sylvain’s phone. He’s gonna send updates and videos on what they’re doing. Hopefully they’ll be enough to convince the facility that Felix is better off with me.”

“Or not! If you don’t remember correctly, the lady fucking hated Felix. She’d probably do whatever she can to make sure he suffers.”

“Maybe the fact that we’re fighting to get him back will prove that we care more than the others-“

“-who literally came to your door and wanted him back. I’ve got no doubt they’ll fight too.” Ashe sighed. “This will only work if they really do something.”

At that moment, your phone pinged. The notification was from Sylvain’s phone. A video from Felix.

You opened the message and pressed okay, shushing Ashe and turning up the volume. Felix was in the backseat of the car while Doug and Karen sat up front. The angle was shitty and the phone was extremely shaky. Felix was trying to hide the phone from them.

“Felix Hugo, what the fuck were you thinking? Leaving like that? After all we’ve done for you?” Karen’s voice was shrill and loud, not even hiding her anger.

“After all you’ve done for me? You’ve done nothing-“

“Shut up! You’re ungrateful. We’ve fed you and housed you. You’re lucky someone even does that for a dumb cat like you. You’re practically feral- unlovable!”

The camera shook a little harder at that word.

Unlovable.

Your heart clenched, but there were still a few more seconds to the video.

“I can’t believe you thought a girl like that would even care about you. See how easily she let you go? She didn’t really want you. See, Felix Hugo? See how worked up you’ve gotten me?”

Doug’s voice cut in, silencing Karen’s annoying distress. “Just wait until we get home. We’ll deal with him there.”

You were probably shaking even more than Felix at this point. ‘Wait until we get home’... you didn’t even want to think of the implications of that.

The video was pure manipulation. But… to some, it may not be enough to make them question Felix’s safety.

Unfortunately.

You texted back, “Just a little more. In about two days, we’ll contact the facility and try to get them to hear us. I’m so sorry.”

“You’re trying your best. Just… try faster.”

“Miss you already.”

Seen.

Hanging your head, you looked up at the two boys. You shrugged and turned off your phone. A few more days, you said. Could you even handle that? You were already so used to his presence. To have an empty household again was something you didn’t want.

Even if it was full of Felix yelling… it was kind of endearing. He was always angry when Ashe and Sylvain were around. It makes sense why other people would be put off by his personality. But he was just…

Defensive.

Felix had walls up that were practically impenetrable. Could that excuse the rude, borderline abusive words he said to others? No. He could only apologize and do better from that. But he wouldn’t get better if he was with Doug and Karen.

You put your head in your hands and began tearing up. “I just want him safe. With me.”

Ashe and Sylvain exchanged glances.

“Yeah, you want him with you. To be with you. To… share your bed, in a literal sense, right?” Sylvain’s eyes held a sly glint in them. You raised an eyebrow.

“What are you on about now?”

“You and Felix. You want him to be with you. You want to be with him…”

“What?”

“Do you have feelings for him? You wanna fuck that cat?”

“Wh- I don’t want to fuck a cat! He’s… he’s more human than cat. Hybrids are just people that can turn into animals…”

Sylvain rolled his eyes. “Hybrids are people that can turn into animals, have ears and a tail, go into heats, all that shit. You don’t want to deal with an angry feline in a heat-“

“Is that why you’re neutered?”

“I’M NOT NEUTERED. FUCK YOU.”

You just sighed and checked your phone again. No check from Felix, even though it hasn't even been five minutes since the last message. You were just scared.

Ashe got up and began to cook dinner for you, deciding that you weren’t fit to do it tonight. You protested, but ultimately complied as Sylvain laid his head in your lap in hopes of an ear scratch.

That night, you tossed and turned. It was weird without a little cat body at the foot of your bed. You couldn’t help but think of worst case scenarios, spanning from just not being able to get Felix back to rather… unsavory ideas of what could be happening to him now. You finally settled down and forced your eyes shut, hoping that your dreams would be better than your thoughts.

They weren’t.

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wilay14 · 6 years

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Adventures in Seoul

I think I have always made clear how much I like f(x), particularly Krystal (don’t get me wrong, I still do), but recently my feelings have started to shift. This happened ever since I got the chance to meet Luna, almost 3 weeks ago.

Coincidentally, she was performing in the reprise of the musical adaptation of Gone With the Wind, playing the role of Scarlett O’Hara. I remembered watching the movie a long time ago, and figured that even without knowing enough Korean, I’d still be able to follow the story... So after much pondering and pretty much almost giving up on going to watch Luna perform, I managed to book a ticket to see her last performance on July 25th.

A lot happened and I was about 10 min late tp the show, so I had to wait outside for a bit before they let me in. Spent the first half of the play on a seat located in the last row. Luckily, the theater was built in a way that even being in that spot, it was still possible to view the stage quite well, so it wasn’t too bad.

After the show, which was quite entertaining, considering I couldn’t understand much of what was being said, I was about to head back to where I’m staying (my “home” for the time being, I guess?) when I spotted a group of about 20 people from afar.

It was pretty late already, but I decided to stick around in hopes I could at least catch a glimpse of Luna and maybe even take a photo OF her (not WITH her cause I am unworthy lmao).

Anyway, we probably waited for about 20-30 min before she came out, and she just started taking selfies with the people who asked for one. I haven’t had the chance to meet that many celebrities, but I know there are people who won’t even acknowledge their fans, so I was pleasantly surprised.

Then, she just walked right into the center of the mini mob we had formed, and started talking with us almost as if we had known each other since forever; as well as saying hi to the fans she managed to recognize. Among the presents she got from some of them, there were several bouquets and expensive-looking cakes and desserts. She seemed pleased. She was also signing autographs for everyone.

The whole 30 minutes we were there, in the heat, surrounded by what sounded hundreds of cicadas being as noisy as ever, I couldn’t stop trembling. It felt like a dream, or maybe even a hallucination.

I hadn’t prepared anything for her to sign -hell, I wasn’t even planning to wait for her-, and I just so happened to have marker with me. I originally wanted her to sign my passport, and after googling if it was okay to do that only to find out it could get me in trouble, I took the next best thing I had with me at the time; the envelope where my ticket was given to me the day before. A fan from either Taiwan or China told me to move forward if I wanted an autograph. She was carrying a big camera, so I figured she must be one of the few fansites left supporting only Luna. She was nice, but I didn’t even get to ask for her name.

I still kept my passport out to show her how to spell my name, and for her to see where I came from (Mexico). She seemed surprised, and spoke to me in English (basic stuff, cause I’ll later come to realized she’d always said it’s not something she’s good at).

I still wonder if she could notice my legs about to give in due to nervousness. I also wonder how many times she’s seen that before haha.

Anyway, I found my entry permit inside my passport and circled my name, to show it to her so she could sign my envelope -right after our less than memorable conversation-; I only managed to point at the circled word, while she doubtingly asked me in Korean “this one?” to which I just nervously nodded, almost embarrassed.

I was so close to her it honestly still doesn’t feel real. I managed to snap a few shots of her with my shitty phone, thoughn most of them look super LQ or blurry haha.

Anyway, she stayed with us for about 30 minutes, even though her manager had arrived a while ago and was waiting for her to wrap it up so they could leave. Her family was already in the car. She also talked about her upcoming SMTOWN performance, only I didn’t understand it at the time lol. I completely forgot her birthday was coming up soon.

Fast-forward to a couple weeks later, I see the announcement about the application period and guidelines for her birthday party. I apply to BOTH of them and, being the unlucky fuck I am, don’t get selected for either one. I was bummed, but had made up my mind to at least go to the SM building, cause they had mentioned there was a slight possibility of getting in if people canceled last minute.

I got there like 2 hours before it started and, sure enough, people were starting to arrived; waiting until after 5 was nerve-wracking, to say the least.

My Korean is barely starting to pick up, so I can’t have conversations with people. Then again, being one of the more evident foreigners present, they quickly identified me and knew I had no “invitation”. She arrived probably about 20 min before it started, I recognized the van from last time.

Anyway, by the time the selected people had entered, only a girl and I were left. She had been selected, but forgot to bring a copy of Free Somebody with her; without it she wasn’t allowed inside either. She noticed I had brought mine with me, and desperately tried to buy it off from me. I didn’t bulge cause she didn’t have any cash with her at that moment, but I was pretty close to telling her to just take it; I just felt bad because she was about to cry.

Then another girl arrived and a staff member came out and told us to wait a little after 5, and MAYBE they could let us in. Spoiler Alert: they did.

I was number 102/100 haha.

They rushed us inside and quickly sat us at the back, and gave us each a balloon with the Free Somebody logo on it. I was almost next to the camera with which they recorded the video uploaded on f(x)’s official FB page and instagram account. There was a smaller camera too, so I suspect Luna was also recording for her Youtube Channel.

It was a fun party, and I was able to confirm once again how charming Luna’s personality is. I guess this is why they used to call her Vitamin. She kept saying “sorry” with a perfect accent as a comedic relief whenever she did/say anything dumb.

We also got to see the birthday messages from Victoria, Amber and Krystal. Luna started tearing up and her manager had to bring her tissues. She suggested to him we should all record a message for the 3 of them, telling them we love them, and so we did. There wasn’t a lot of space for the manager to set the right angle, so there’s a chance I’m not even featured in it.

We sang happy birthday and she answered some questions. Then there was a lottery among the selected people where they got signed balloons and polaroids with her.

When it was over, roughly an hour or so later, she said she had a surprise for us; she had taken the time to handwrite and sign 100 cards for the attendees. I was given one even though I wasn’t supposed to get anything. I’m glad I did. This marks the second autograph I get from her.

She is a gift that keeps on giving. She’s also super talented and overall such a nice, awesome person; she does hands-on charity work whenever her schedule allows her to. She supports Animal Rights as well as Female Rights; she’s done campaigning for both in the past.

I really wish more people could see that. I really wish more people could support her, especially her music, which as of lately, is all self-composed and just SO GOOD.

She deserves the world, and she’s been working her ass off for it. She’s being criticized for an infinity of things. She’s been through a lot since debuting, and finally she’s able to do what she likes most, which is singing/performing. I’m just so glad I became a MeU, and I’ll keep supporting her as much as I’m able to, for as long as I can.

Please give Luna -Park Sunyoung- a chance to captivate you the way she has done with me, all in the span of these past few weeks.

#seoul #south korea #kpop #f(x)#Luna #f(x) Luna #180725 #180812 #MeU #fan account #Gone With the Wind Musical #Park Sunyoung

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finn-nelson-for-the-win · 5 years

Text

The Good Life: Chapter 6

Hello, my lovelies! I procrastinated writing this chapter even though I knew that I had plans for this week/weekend, so alas...here I am posting this week’s chapter at the last second to stay more or less on schedule for posting haha.

Need to get caught up? The Good Life: Ch1, Ch2, Ch3, Ch4 , Ch5

If you want to be added (or removed) from the tags list for this story, just feel free to let me know!

@pink-royaute @believethaticanandiwill @milllott @likeashootingstarfades @i-dream-of-emus @eveerez

The Good Life: Chapter 6

Rae moved things around haphazardly on her desk trying to find the source of the loud ringing that had interrupted the music that had been playing through the wireless speakers on Rae’s desk.

“Hello!” Rae said when she found her phone and answered it moments before it would have automatically gone to voicemail.

“There you are, Rae-Rae! I wasn’t sure that you were gonna pick up the phone,” Chloe replied on the other end of the phone call.

“Sorry, I’ve been unpacking the last couple boxes in my bedroom all day since I got back from work this morning and I guess my phone got lost on my desk during the process.”

“No need to apologize! It’s just been a while since I’ve heard from you and I wanted to know if you were free to video chat? If my memory serves me right, you still owe me a brief tour of your apartment!”

“Yeah, now’s a good time for me. I’ll go ahead and end this call and you can video call me and I’ll answer on my laptop.”

Rae and Chloe each ended the call on their side and Rae walked over to her bed to unplug her laptop and get ready to answer the video call from Chloe.

After a few minutes, a shrill ringing sound came through the speakers on Rae’s laptop and Chloe’s contact picture appeared on the screen with the option to accept or deny the video call.

“Hiya Chloe!” Rae said cheerfully as she answered the video call and saw her best mate appear on the screen.

“Hey babes! How are you today? You look exhausted!”

“Wow, thanks Chloe,” Rae replied with an eye roll, “I am pretty tired. Work today was really long and boring. Moving and unpacking and whatnot has also been really tiring. I turned in my keys to my old apartment on Friday, so I’m officially completely moved out of that apartment, but going back and forth between the two different places for the last week or two has been super hectic.”

“I can definitely understand that, but at least you’re done now! You mentioned that you finished unpacking all your boxes here at the new place though, right?

“Yeah, just before you called me. I’m still trying to figure out where exactly to put some of the stuff, but at least I have space to walk around my bedroom without all these boxes in the way.”

“So, what do you say? Can I get the unofficial grand tour of the place or what?”

“Yeah, of course!” Rae replied with a chuckle as she picked up her laptop and walked out of her bedroom, “I’ll start by our front door and then I’ll end back in my bedroom again.”

Rae walked through each room of the apartment, stopping to angle her laptop camera at specific things that she wanted Chloe to see and telling Chloe about what they intend to put in each room if they had not already. Rae paid special attention to showing Chloe how nice the kitchen was and how spacious their balcony was, hoping that her best mate would like her new apartment as much as she did.

“So here in the living room we have the couch we bought together and the TV from my old apartment. It still works fine, so Finn and I decided that we might as well keep it out here,” Rae explained as she walked around the room, “And here we have one of my other favorite things about this apartment...the fireplace!”

“You guys have a fireplace? That’s gonna be so nice when it gets cold in the evenings in a few months!”

“I know! I don’t know how to use it yet, because it’s electric, but I’m excited to figure it out so then we can use it!”

Rae walked back to her bedroom to conclude the brief apartment tour and took a seat on her bed with her back against the wall.

“So, what do you think of the apartment?”

“I love it! It looks really nice and I think it’s going to be really good for you and Finn,” Rae hummed her agreement and Chloe continued, “Speaking of, how are things going between you and Finn so far? Is the whole ‘roommates’ thing working out for you two?”

“It’s been great so far. He’s been a lot of help with unpacking and we’ve done a lot of shopping for things in the common rooms together. It’s been a lot of fun to just hang out and bond as roommates as we get into the groove of living with each other too.”

“Oh, come on, Rae! There has to be something about him that you’re realizing is annoying about Finn now that you’re living with him. Does he snore? Is he shit about cleaning his dishes? There has to be something!”

“Uh, I dunno...he leaves the air on really cold sometimes so at night I need extra blankets or I get too cold.”

“That’s it?”

“I suppose so, or at least I can’t think of anything else right now,” Rae added with a shrug, “We’ve been getting along pretty well so far and haven’t really run into any issues thus far.”

“Well, just keep an eye on him and let me know if he gives you any trouble and if he does, I’m gonna make his life a living hell.”

“I appreciate that Chloe, but I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for him to slip up!”

“Anyways...are you both still on for the pub on Friday night? All of the gang has been anxious to hear more about how the apartment is working out and to see how the both of you are adjusting to roommate life.”

“Yeah, we should both be able to make it, I think!”

“Alright well, I guess I’ll let you go now. I’ll talk to you la—”

The sound of the front door of the apartment unlocking and opening pulled both Rae and Chloe away from their conversation.

Finn stepped through the front door of the apartment and hung his keys on the hook on the wall and walked down the hallway.

“Hiya!” Rae called to him through the open door of her bedroom.

“Honey, I’m home!” Finn sing-songed as he leaned against the frame of Rae’s door and gave her a wide grin.

“Ugh stop,” Rae balked in fake disgust.

“You know you loved it,” Finn replied with a chuckle, “Sorry, I’ve always seen people do that in shows and movies and I’ve secretly always wanted to do it too.”

“Was it as much fun as all the old shows make it seem?”

“It kind of was.”

“Well, I’m glad. I was just finishing up a video call with Chloe! Say ‘hi’, Chloe!” Rae said as she angled her laptop screen towards Finn so Chloe could see him.

“Oh! Hey Chloe!”

“Hi Finn!”

“I’ll just let you two get back to your conversation now. Sorry for interrupting!” Finn replied as he walked away from Rae’s open door and walked into his bedroom across the hall.

“Rae, is Finn gone now?”

“Er, yeah…”

“Good...what the fuck was that?” Chloe whisper-yelled.

“Oh, are ya talking about Finn’s greeting? That was just a joke.”

“Are ya sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure, Chloe. I have to go now and I’m sure you have better things to do than over-analyze every silly thing Finn says, so I’ll talk to you later, alright?”

Chloe was still talking when Rae laughed and ended the video call with an eye roll.

“Knock-knock,” Finn said as he tapped lightly on Rae’s bedroom door with his fist.

“What’s up, Finnley?”

“I just wanted to see if you were still talking to Chloe or not.”

“Nope! I just ended the call. Why?” Rae replied as she set her laptop down on the bed beside her and stood up, stretching slightly after sitting in an odd position for too long.

“Are we still on for Thai takeaway and shitty scary movies tonight?”

“Obviously! It is Thai food Thursday, after all,” Rae replied with smirk as she looked on her desk for the list she had made of low-budget horror movies they wanted to check out this week.

“Perfect, I’ll call in the order!” Finn replied with a wide smile as he turned away from Rae’s room and walked down the hallway.

A/N: At the end of the last chapter I said I was going to move away from dialogue-heavy chapters a bit, but I completely lied lol. I didn’t mean to lie, but this chapter came along pretty easily and just so happened to be pretty dialogue-heavy, so oops ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I guess we’ll just have to wait and see what the next few chapters have in store for us! Until next time: Stay awesome, my friends!

#my mad fat diary #mmfd #mmfd fanfic #my mad fat diary fanfiction #finn-nelson-for-the-win #my writing #the good life: ch6

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