Little guys (Patreon)

𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐨 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤 | 𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐱 𝐭.

you and a certain riddler (eycte!alex) have some fun at a halloween party.

warnings: unprotected sex (piv), veeery soft dom!alex, i think that's it lol

word count: 4.6k

english is not my first language, so sorry if there are any grammatical errors. also this is my first smut posted here, i'm fucking nervous :v

‘’so, you think it will take a while for her to arrive?’’ 

alex heard miles' question sound far away as his eyes were fixed on the partially busy street. they were at the entrance to the hotel exactly ten minutes ago for a costume party, after all, it was halloween.

‘’perhaps. it wouldn't be her if she wasn't late, eh?’’ he replied, looking at his wristwatch and avoiding rubbing his eyes in frustration, as he didn't want to smudge the perfectly done eyeliner on the waterline of his eyes.

alex had planned this for over a month, not just because miles and other friends would be at this party, but because you would be there. well, at least that's what you told him three days ago, when he asked you for the umpteenth time if you were really going. turner knew you well enough to know that you could change your mind in the blink of an eye. you weren't the type to leave the house, so seeing you be anywhere other than your apartment was like a huge event that he really didn't want to miss.

‘’you can go ahead if you want. i'll wait ‘ere.’’ alex turned to kane when he saw him adjust the platinum wig on his head. he couldn't say exactly what miles' fantasy was, but he didn't think it was bad. it suited him.

‘’nah, i don't think it will be necessary.’’ miles pointed with his chin in the opposite direction, making alex turn his head. his eyes caught sight of the silver toyota prius arriving at the rotating parking lot. alex breathed a sigh of relief mixed with satisfaction when he knew it was you.

he didn’t look away for a second, not even when the valet came around the car to open the driver’s door so you could get out. he thought he forgot how he breathed when he saw you tiptoe out of the vehicle, wearing a strapless leather dress, highlighting even more your clavicle and well-defined shoulders; the black leather boots didn't shine any more than the chocker-style necklace wrapped around your neck subtly, not looking so tight; your voluminous hair was down, finished impeccably, and turner thought for a moment that was the reason you took your sweet time. as you approached as if you were parading on a catwalk, he noticed how the femme fatale makeup fit you like a glove, your entire face seemed more highlighted with the catty eyelashes.

he definitely couldn't stop looking at you. and he didn't even want to.

‘’what kind of fantasy is this, miles?’’ it was the first thing you asked after you handed over your car keys to the valet to park your car in a space in the underground parking lot. ‘’i don't know, a mix of elvis presley and niall horan?’’

‘’yeah, yeah, very funny.’’ miles forced a laugh without a hint of humor. ‘’this is art, okay? ric flair, better known as the nature boy.’’ he said, taking a walk while you let out a laugh. ‘’of course ya’ don't know, just want to know about lovecraft and allan poe.’’

‘’and what's wrong with that?’’ you rolled your eyes in amusement, then resting them on turner. his smile grew even wider when he saw you so close and so… tempting. you never thought you'd actually need to see turner wearing eyeliner until you saw it before your eyes. ‘’oh, and you must be…’’ you said, sliding your index finger over qlex's covered shoulder, making him smile.

‘’c’mon, darlin’. it shouldn't be that hard to know who i am.’’ alex extended his arms, also doing a little turn so that you could look at him up and down and caught your lip between your teeth just in time, before he could complete the turn and look back at you. ‘’what does a liar do when he’s dead?’’

‘’he lies still.’’ you replied immediately, seeing alex smile as he nodded. ‘’well, 's not bad, al. such a perfect riddler. better than a certain someone…’’ you mumbled under your breath as you gestured to miles, making turner hold back a laugh.

‘’yeah, just pretend i'm not here. bullying can be avoided, ya’ know?’’ he lightly pushed you by the shoulder, making you laugh. you couldn't help it, but you knew that deep down, it was all just a joke. you and miles got along very well, especially because you had been friends for a long time and it was through him that you met alex. it couldn't be better.

‘’c’mon, you know i love you, mi.’’ you hugged him over his shoulder, gently rubbing the palm of your hand on miles' chin, feeling his sparse beard tickle your open palm.

‘’okay, okay. and who are you, by the way?’’ he asked, now paying attention to your costume.

‘’neither do i know. something close to the characters in the books i read, a mix of dracula and… i don't know.’’ you said, shaking the vampire cape you wore. turner couldn't help but let an almost invisible smirk appear. he knew you would choose something like this, it was as if he knew you like the back of his hand.’’

‘’i liked it. ‘s just like you.’’ alex said, seeing you smile without showing your teeth, your cheeks flushed as the smile was still present on your face. ‘’looks like you’ve been flashin’ triple A passes at the cemetery gates.’’

‘’oh, here it comes. we don't have time for that, let's go ‘cause the night is young and it grows fast.’’ miles gestured in mock boredom, opening the way for you to enter. obviously you and alex followed him side by side, and alex didn't pass up the opportunity he had by wrapping his arm around your waist, resting his hand there. 

of course, you didn't stop feeling that ravenous shiver, even though you tried to hide it as best you could. you just loved alex's touch on any area of your body. literally any area.

‘’thought you weren't going to come.’’ alex whispered in your ear, even though the room was filled with loud music, you were able to hear and smile.

‘’i thought about giving up, you know me. i hate leaving the my cave.’’ you laughed through your nose, looking at him. alex awakened something inexplicable in you, even more now. the clothes, the hair, the makeup, the way his jaw was so marked as if it could cut diamonds, the eyes marked by eyeliner seemed more enigmatic even in the partially lit environment, the mouth that seemed to invite you for a kiss in a hidden corner... all of that was capable of taking away what little sanity you had left and making you insane, even if you hadn't drunk a drop of alcohol until that moment.

‘’oh, sweetheart, you would break me heart if you didn't come.’’ turner pouted amidst his slurred voice, letting his thumb run up and down your waist, giving you an almost imperceptible caress. you held your breath subtly, trying not to lose your self-control.

but in front of alex turner, you had anything but self-control.

‘’it's not like you won't have fun here without me.’’ you joked, taking a drink from the waiter who passed by, serving drinks on a golden tray. the party was packed, more than expected. miles had already gotten lost in the crowd, not that you cared about that. you’re fine just in each other's company.’’

‘’it wouldn't be that funny, love.’’ alex laughed, letting his nose run over your bare shoulder, feeling the fragrance of your perfume invade his nostrils, absorbing a smile that was impossible to hide. ‘’you and your mysterious energy like someone with an unkind of ravens and murder of crows fascinate me. i couldn't do without you ‘ere.’’ he finished, taking some of his drink to try. his throat burned with the first sip, but nothing he wasn't used to.

‘’me and my mysterious energy? this one is new.’’ — you raised an eyebrow, a little curious. alex couldn't explain exactly what caught his attention.

he knew that you were kinda different from the other girls he had ever met. fascinated by lovecraft and edgar allan poe, further denoting your small obsession with death. your favorite films were horror films, especially the italian kind. you could spend hours and hours listening to the soundtracks while driving your prius through the city streets in your dark leather clothes, living your life the way you wanted.

he loved your authenticity. you weren't afraid or ashamed to be like this. maybe that was what excited him so much that he wanted you so bad.

alex laughed instead of giving you an answer, pulling you onto the dance floor. at one point, they met up with miles and other mutual friends, you drank, had fun listening to some music from the 80s. you felt free to do whatever you wanted as the drink got more to your heads and the zeros lined up on the clock.

in fact, you don't usually go to these places, you'd much rather be at home under the covers and in the company of a good book. but when you were with alex and miles, everything seemed to get better. or more specifically, when you were with alex. even though he was completely the opposite of you, turner was seen as a kind of magnet, impossible to ignore, especially when you had already taken enough shots to lose track of each other and the sexual tension increased with each exchange of glances.

little did you know that even though he wasn't your type, alex was completely willing to try something.

‘’what do you think we get out of ‘ere, baby?’’ you heard qlex's voice drawl when he brought his mouth to your ear. you thought he did it on purpose, just to make every hair on your body stand on end. and well, it really was on purpose.

‘’where?’’ you asked, wrapping your arms around his neck, feeling him closer. turner looked around for a moment, trying to adjust his blurry vision. you could go to any room in that hotel, but he had a better idea in mind.

‘’your car.’’ he suggested. you gave a roguish smile, finishing your drink in one gulp. oh, you knew exactly where this would take them, and there was no way you were going to back down now. not when turner is absurdly irresistible and you're in an overwhelming mood.

‘’what about miles?’’ you dared to ask, looking over his shoulder, seeing your friend dancing as if there was no tomorrow, not caring about the two of you there.

‘’don't give a shit about him right now.’’ turner said, tilting his face a little to give you a soft kiss without using his tongue, already being able to awaken even more that insane desire in both you and himself. ‘’just want you, darlin’.’’ he finished in a whisper, biting your bottom lip.

you didn't need to respond any further, leading the way immediately, passing through the euphoric and drunk bodies, gripping alex's hand who was following right behind you, also eager to get out of there as soon as possible. you got your car keys from reception, and soon the two of you were heading to the parking lot, stopping to exchange some caresses that you thought were urgent since you couldn't do it while walking.’’

‘’oh, i love this car.’’ alex comments in an ecstatic sigh, letting his hand slide over the sparkling silver bodywork of the trunk of your toyota prius.

‘’more than me?’’ you asked, leaning your body against the warm hood of the car, practically lying on it. alex watched the scene in slow motion with a roguish smile. and for him it was impossible not to walk towards you, leaving your bodies almost glued together, his hands were firm on your waist while he used one of his legs to create a small space between your legs.

‘’no, no more than you, honey.’’ he replied in a purr, his thirsty lips trailed across your chin in a drawn-out kiss, making you gasp as you felt the light pressure of his kiss on your neck.

soon enough, the kisses on your neck stopped when you felt the need to feel his lips crushing yours, becoming as urgent as the touches on his neck and waist, bringing him closer to you, his sneaky hands moved down to lift the skirt of your dress so that you felt freer to open your legs a little more and he could be in the middle, pressing more against you. the rough kiss had an alcoholic taste, not that you minded that, in fact, it made everything even more delicious when mixed with the heavy breathing and racing hearts.

‘’fuck, you're so…’’ he murmured amid the kiss, feeling your hands loosening the black tie he was wearing around his neck. even though he was a musical genius, words always seemed to escape him when it came to you. and you loved it.

‘’so…?’’ you laughed, biting his lip softly before turning your face away to look around. you didn't know if anyone was nearby or if there were cameras in that parking lot. but deep down, you both loved that adrenaline.

‘’so dark. but i want you hard.’’ he said, grabbing your face by the chin and forcing you to look at him. his hair that was previously combed back was messy, and that made him even sexier in your opinion. ‘’so hard…’’ he repeated as he kissed you again, as if somehow he couldn't live without feeling your mouth against his and your tongues tangling briefly.

‘’how much? do you have a percentage?’’ you teased him as you felt his hands squeeze the warm skin of your thighs, sliding a little lower. every touch and sensation was so electrifying that any little thing could make you even more aroused.

‘’fuck the percentage, i want you so much. so fuckin’ much.’’ he laughed, dragging his slightly drunken voice. you laughed too, you liked that it was always in moments like this that you managed to get a hearty laugh out of each other, and so soon you were in the backseat of your car.

within moments, you were sitting on his lap, feeling his hands on your back and the cold breeze from the air conditioning on. turner relaxed his body against the back of the backseat, wrapping one hand around your waist while the other pressed the back of your head as you trailed kisses on his neck. he gasped with each touch, each time he felt your tongue snake up his neck to his earlobe while your hands had the agile job of unbuttoning his shirt and getting rid of his belt.

you had an immense desire for each other, and every second seemed to increase your desire even more, especially when you kissed him again, so deeply that you lost your breath, even more so when you moved your hips in his lap, feeling him pant against your mouth.

you quickly unzipped alex's pants, sliding them down enough with his help as he lifted his hips so that you had an easier time taking off not only his pants but also his boxers, revealing his throbbing erection pulling out of his confines.

you give a smirk, not hesitating to place your right hand there, causing a drawn out sigh from him. your touch was all that he needed, he was craving it for such a long fucking time.

‘’i’m not going to lie, it's the first time i've done this in a car.’’ he said, still panting as he felt your hand slide up and down his cock, seeing you sit a little below his belly so that his leaking tip gently brushed against your belly. you were stroking him so deliciously slow, making him clench his fists in anticipation.

‘’same, i don't even know if this will work.’’ you laughed softly, feeling alex’s hands lower the top of your dress a little just to see the sight of your breasts exposed in front of him, leaving him more aroused than he could have imagined.

‘’let’s make it work, love.’’ he replied, moving his hand to your panties, not feeling the need to take them off, just using his index and middle fingers to form a hook and pull them to the side, leaving them free so he could test the waters a little, teasing you just like you did to him. ‘’oh, you’re so wet, baby.’’ he smirked, using his thumb to ghost over your clit, his touch was as light as a feather, and it was torturous for you. ‘’we didn't do anything and you're already soaked, eh?’’

‘’and it’s all your fault.’’ you grumbled, pressing your thumb on his fat tip, spreading the precum all over his throbbing cock. he let out a growl, he wish he could eat you out until you’re screaming his name and your moans echo throughout the parking lot, but he was kinda desperate to feel you around him.

''lift your hips, babe. need to feel you.'' he commanded, still holding your panties firmly to the side with the hook he formed with his fingers.

you obeyed immediately, raising your hips a little, rubbing his tip through your folds, spreading your wetness over it, closing your eyes as you sink down on him, feeling him bury his cock completely inside of you, throwing your body back a little, placing both of your hands on his knees while he helped you move by putting one hand on your waist and the other were still occupied holding your panties to the side.

your movements were slow, lifting your hips up and bringing them down again, making alex have the privilege of seeing his cock coming out almost completely to the point of seeing his tip out and then disappearing completely inside of you, your walls feeling like home for him. and you did this with such precision, increasing the pace a little more with each bounce, both of you panting with each firm thrust.

‘’f-fuck, al, feels so fuckin’ g-good…’’ you barely have the voice to whisper in his ear when you lean your body towards him, making him place one of his hands on your lower back. alex kissed your neck, already free from the necklace when you took it off earlier, leaving a trail of saliva with his tongue until he reached your jawline.

‘’you feel so fucking good, darling. so tight…’’ alex hummed, satisfied with the feeling of your tits against his chest, your hard nipples poking his skin. ‘’you ‘ave no idea how much i want you on all fours right now.’’ he said, sucking the air tightly between his teeth, his hand moved to give you a hard slap on your left buttock, making a noise that would certainly echo through the room if you were in one.

‘’let’s make it work, love.’’ you repeated his line, seeing him smile as he caught his lower lip between his teeth as he caught one last glimpse of you above him. you had an idea, knowing that you could fold down the backseat, doing so by pressing the small latch in the corner of the car, folding the seat down and creating more space.

now you were able to reverse positions, and soon you were on all fours towards him, letting your ass up so that he could take you from behind. the car was silent, you only heard the sound of his breathing and your own breathing before you felt him pulling down your panties until it reached your bent knees, your hole were clenching around nothing, feeling so empty without him, but soon this emptiness were filled when he entered you again with no warming, making you gasp.

his hands grabbed your waist after traveling a path along your thighs and buttocks, respectively, feeling your skin shivering at his touch. you pressed the upholstery of the seat with one hand while the other was leaning against the window. whoever was passing by could easily see the prints of your fingers and palm because of the air conditioning on. 

even though the pace was slow at first, you couldn't help but roll your eyes at the delicious sensation of feeling him fucking you so deep , his tip kissing your cervix repeatedly, even more so when he held your shoulder, making you lift your head a little and feel his warm and alcoholic breath hitting your hair as he leaned his body a little more over yours.

turner had a smile on his lips, he liked the sight of having you in all fours at him, and even more so when you were so lubricated that it was even slippery, he could pull out his entire cock and bottoms out with such ease and did it several times, not only because it is extremely pleasurable for him, but also for you. 

he loved seeing you so cockdrunked, he love to see you arch your back as you contorted your body whenever he hit your g-spot to the point that it made you feel a small twinge, just like a cramp.

‘’oh, fuck, alex.’’ you growled, grabbing his wrist, making him look at you while you turned your head enough to look him in the eyes. you had bright eyes, a flushed face, your lipstick was completely smudged and your chest was rising and falling with heavy breathing.

‘’yeah?’’ he asked cynically, leaning his body more to leave a small kiss on your shoulder, watching you struggle to reach his lips to try to give him a kiss.

‘’are you sure i'm the dark one around here?’’ you mumbled, and alex gave another smile. he knew you wanted more. he might as well make you beg for it, he liked being in control, and that turned him on even more.

‘’shh, you are very impatient.’’ he tilted his body more so he could kiss you while he remained still inside you, then returning to his starting position to continue thrusting slowly for a few more seconds, just for fun.

he kept his eyes closed, feeling his adam's apple throb and even though he tried to ignore it, he couldn't help but respond to your requests for more. the position made the penetration deeper and, when he realized that you were more comfortable and wiggling your ass to match his pace, he sank his fingers into your hips as he began to thrust harder.

there was a moment when you didn't know which was louder, whether it was their moans or the sound of his hips bumping against your ass, and turner didn't hesitate to close his fist around your hair, making you roll your eyes under your eyelids, needing just a few more thrusts so he could notice your arms failing to keep you fully on all fours, announcing the arrival of a orgasm.

alex wraps his arm around your waist, his palm resting on your belly, making you partially kneel while he is pounding hard, just to hear you moan his name madly, feeling your nails scratch his arms wrapped around your torso. 

his other hand roamed to your front, moving down so his middle and ring finger could rub your clit tirelessly, making your knees even weaker as you grabbed his hair for your dear life. you're just a babbling mess, and he liked the effect he had on you.

‘’what’s the matter? you wanted it hard, so you’re fucking getting it.’’ he growled, biting your shoulder as you gasped for air, your cunt was clenching hard around him, you’re really close.

‘’fuck, fuck, fuck, alex, ‘m gonna cum, please…’’ you moaned breathlessly, feeling his fingers keeping its ministrations on your sensitive bud.

‘’mhmm, that’s right, baby, cum for me.’’ he encouraged you, and you just loved it when he talked to you like that, and it didn't take long for you to cum on his cock, he kept fucking you through your orgasm just to prolong this overwhelming feeling.

and of course, it didn't take him long to follow suit, letting go of everything he was fighting to hold back just for the feeling of pleasure to linger, his hot load coated your walls, filling you up so good. soon he was breathing deeply as he tried to adjust his blurred vision, his grip on you still tight.

he let his limp body fall onto the bench, seeing that you did the same. now you’re concentrated on regulating your own breathing. you had a smile on your face, running your tongue over your lips as if you couldn't believe what just happened.

his half closed eyes still captured the moment when you reached the dashboard only to turn off the air conditioning and open the glove compartment, taking out a cigarette pack and a black lighter. every movement you made was slow, from the moment you brought the unlit cigarette to your full lips until the moment you took the first drag, blowing the smoke outside through the small crack in the window you opened.

‘’why are you looking at me like that?’’ you asked curiously, your bent legs swinging from side to side in a distracted way. turner shook his head, taking a drag on the cigarette you offered him next.

‘’i just like looking at you.’’ he replied after releasing smoke from his mouth. you both stayed in a comfortable silence for a while longer, just looking at each other and enjoying what you had. and you wouldn't trade it for anything. ‘’we should do this again.’’

‘’maybe in a bigger car.’’ you added, looking inside your prius before taking another drag, taking your hand to the outside of the car to get rid of the cigarette ashes. ‘’but I really want to do it again. not here.’’ you raised one of your eyebrows, sliding your foot over turner's bare and sweaty chest, letting him know that you weren't satisfied with just this quickie. and he wasn't either. he would never get tired of doing this to you wherever he went.

‘’my place or yours?’’ he asked with a smirk, seeing you shrug your  shoulders. 

‘’odds and evens?’’ you asked and alex laughed.

‘’fair enough. evens.’’ he responded by closing his hand and you did the same, and they soon showed the chosen numbers. alex showed one finger and you showed two.

‘’guess i won this one.’’ you giggled, touching the tip of his nose, implying that you were going to your apartment. and then, they were putting back your clothes and getting ready to leave the parking lot in the car.

‘’are we really going to leave miles ‘ere?’’ he asked, laughing as he combed his hair with his fingers. you laughed, nodding.

‘’miles knows how to manage without us for a night.’’ you replied, allowing yourself to speed up the car as you left the hotel, moving further and further away. ‘’i just know that i want you so hard.’’

‘’how much? do you have a percentage?’’ alex asked, hearing your hearty laugh echo through the car while the wind that came through the window ruffled your hair and made you more graceful.

‘’fuck the percentage, i want you so much. so fuckin’ much.’’

alex laughed, being quick enough to steal a peck from you as you took you both to your apartment or wherever. alex didn't care about having a certain destiny as long as he was with you.

after that, all you saw before your sparkling eyes while you both were inside the prius was an empty avenue on a halloween night in los angeles.

June 17, 2022

I’ve got nothing to say right now so I’ll clear out the draft of this almost year-old post in honor of the new Calamity-based miniseries that Critical Role’s finishing up, I guess.  I sort of just wrote this all out and then never continued it because I never actually finished the original EXU miniseries.  Honestly?  I still kind of feel bad about that.

[August 15, 2021]

I just read through a long, long reddit post/thread thingy about EXU and like,,, I have thoughts, I think.

Aabria was very different from Matt in her GM style.  I thought it was fun and funky, you know, more... approachable?  Less... corporate?  Doesn’t mean there weren’t some times when I wasn’t feeling it (there are times when I’m not super engaged when Matt’s DMing either, mind you).

The thing I liked least about EXU wasn’t Aabria’s style (and I mean there are valid critiques of how she disregarded rules, I think, but I rarely rarely ever found it grossly distracting).  Honestly it was the storyline.  I was so down for a miniseries.  I adored Undeadwood.  I didn’t know that Undeadwood was partially scripted until today.  I think that approach is effective for a miniseries that incorporates improv.  I imagine that it’s similar to how I imagine the DSMP was scripted, in that certain plot points had to happen and certain character interactions had to take place (but, of course, I don’t actually know how these partially scripted series, whether long or short form, are done, so).  But we all know of Exandria as a literal open world.  A sandbox game.  Aabria gave them a storyline from the start, but the players noped their way out of it which was totally within their right.  And Aabria couldn’t do much about it without coming off as wrangling their free choice.  So then we enter Tal’dore and the party just sort of goes about traveling and meeting people and conversing with gods (which, my dnd-friend and I both noted, was very different from the standard Matt had set for how the divine interacted with mortals, especially level three nobody mortals lol).  The plot was just, like, not there.  I like open-world games.  I like wanderings and encounters with new people.  I just felt like, as far as a completed arc goes,,, I didn’t get that.  

I liked the characters!  I liked the encounters!  I liked the open-world!  I liked how each character had a full, legit backstory!   I liked the threads!  I didn’t like the loose ends.  Aabria presented a number of potential storyline paths (and like, good on her for that).  She (obviously, I think) had a preference, but the characters subverted all of them which, honestly, was a little wild to watch/listen to.  I remember in episode 6 I think where Dorian was like “well what if we went south to help the tetrarch” and the tetrarch was like “I hadn’t considered that as an option” and even though I was only listening I knew that was not the GM’s intention for the party at all.  But it’s improv!  “Yes, and!”  At that point, what can you do but give the party the choice?  Like, even from the first episode or two, Aabria would be like “roll a perception check” and the player would be like “three! :D” and this would happen like, five times in a row and Aabria would just kinda be stuck, unable to give them threads no matter how hard she tried because they just couldn’t pass perception checks.  I felt bad for her tbh.

Those wouldn’t’ve been issues if EXU (s1?) hadn’t been limited to eight episodes.

I also heard that some people didn’t like Opal like, a lot.  It reminds me of how people didn’t like Keyleth (I mean, I mostly thought Keyleth was cute if perhaps a little naive for her wisdom score) and Matt had to say on stream that negative things about Marisha would not be tolerated.  I thought Opal’s character was fun and very I-may-be-a-teenager-but-I-know-more-than-you.  An argumentative popular girl from high school.  Sometimes over the top, perhaps, but within character bounds, I’d say.

I don’t necessarily want to pull a misogyny/racism card here, I really don’t.  But I mean, hey, if we as a society that went through the social justice movement of 2020 learned anything, well, one of those things is that unconscious biases affect almost everything we do.  I’ve admitted to having them to; everyone does.  They do affect the lens with which we view media and how/whether we’re able to relate to it.

I think the conversation on Reddit was pretty tame (I did learn that apparently C1 + C2 is like 900 hours of content which is crazy (and that person also noted that it wouldn’t be unreasonable for individuals who’ve followed both to have developed a sort of parasocial relationship with the cast (I can confidently say that I most certainly have not, but it is a valid thought, I’d say))), though I didn’t read through it all and the mods did turn off comments to keep the conversation from veering too far away from civility.  Apparently Twitter was pretty vapid.  Twitch subs went down pretty drastically these past two months, I read.  According to some redditors, ig and tumblr tend to have more of a toxically positive view of CR in which the main cast/crew can do no wrong (an interesting observation).

[Today]

I don’t really have anything more to add.  I’m thinking of downloading the available Calamity episodes (I don’t actually know what the series is called lol) and having them for when I travel.  I also still need to finish the very end of that last Ursula K LeGuin book.  More urgently, I need to finish packing and also clean my room.

Today I’m thankful for patient parents.  So, so thankful.

[edit: oh also I’m thankful that making two hunned a week this summer for doing ~almost nothing~ for a prof last semester... like this is quite literally the best deal ever]

Kintypes turning out to be fictotypes

About a year and a half ago my partner told me that they had discovered a robot kintype that they wanted to further explore, and to do so together.

My partner and I have been together for ten years in this life. We are both fictionkin, and our metaphysical history and nature is continuous and intertwined. We have known one another in different ways in different times and worlds. It was obvious that if they had a kintype where they were a robot of some kind, that I had been there in some way too. Hearing about it, in fact, immediately resonated with me. I told them of course I wanted to help them explore it.

When they told me about what they knew about that kintype, this was what they initially said:

they were built and styled to look female

the robots were all quite doll-like

they were produced specifically for military combat

they were an early model or prototype unit

they had been in storage/stasis/scrap for a long time

they had been in a war with an enemy who overran them

they had been almost completely destroyed in combat and remembered shutting down

Hearing all this when they told me evoked an immediate emotional response from me, and I felt almost immediately that I knew something about who I had been when they were a robot.I was positive, immediately, that I had been some sort of mechanic or engineer, and that I had been the one who repaired them after they shut down. I also felt pretty strongly that I knew what I would have looked like; a delicate featured young man with tousled brown hair.

After we discussed our feelings and memories for a few weeks, one thing that my partner wanted to do was to explore fiction, to see if there was a story that matched– if this was an unknown fictionkin type. We both knew that it was just as likely that this was an otherkintype; that the story that matched our experiences might not have been told in this world yet, or not told in a medium that we would ever discover. Personally, I felt like that was most likely the case; that we would only ever find partial matches with things that resonated but weren’t The Thing We Experienced.

But still, we looked. After all, looking at things and figuring out what made them Not The Thing would only help us further our understanding of what we actually had experienced.

So we delved into a LOT of robot fiction.

I combed a LOT of wiki pages. We watched a LOT of shows. A lot of stories that otherwise might have hit were counted out because the character was a cyborg not a robot.

Nier Automata felt close, but the world felt too far apocalyptic, and we both felt that in our world the human population had been reduced, but was still present.

My partner looked at a lot of serious, gritty war stories about science fiction wars.

I looked at a lot of 90s/2000s dating sims and harem anime where young men rescue robots and dolls.

Neither of us found anything that felt ‘right’.

And then, 2 months ago, we found it.

On the evening of this body of mine’s physical birthday, we were watching a youtube video detailing the new anime coming out this season. At the very end of the video, I was about to turn it off, when the youtuber started talking about an anime based on a gacha game, about robot girls. We were both like ‘lol this won’t be it’, but we had made it a policy to at least glance at everything that we found that hit some of the criteria just in case.

So I played the anime’s trailer.

Almost immediately my partner’s reaction was ‘oh no. OH NO’. There was a particular moment of puppet/doll imagery in the trailer in particular that smacked her in the face.

So we went to the wiki.

I was expecting (hoping?) for some detail to jump out that clashed with the things we had figured out on our own. But the more I read, the more everything actually fell into place.

There were military robots built to look female; and who were doll-like. They were in fact explicitly called dolls, something my partner had said a few times before. There was the character who my partner had been describing; who was an early model, who was in storage for a long time, who had been destroyed in a large battle. And there was the tousel-haired young mechanic who had fixed her. He looked almost exactly the way I’d been picturing and describing to my partner.

Rather than elements disproving that this was The Source, everything we learned felt more and more right. As we read the wiki. As we watched the show. As we read the manga. As we caught up with the goddamned chinese mid-tier gacha game. It's called Girls Frontline, or Dolls Frontline, in case anyone was wondering.

Despite all my expectations that there was no way that we’d discover a kintype, remember details about that kintype, and then later discover that there was an actual media that matched it note for note and was The Thing…. There it was.

It was like if I had remembered being Ken Ichijouji and then only later found that Digimon was an actual show that was real. It was like a bucket of ice water over my head. It was a hell of an experience.

I don’t really know what to say to wrap this up. I wanted to share this experience because it's something that has, unsurprisingly, been heavy on my mind lately. It defied my expectations. Its something that in my mind, reminds me that what I experience as metaphysical fictionkin is to me, really stranger than people typically believe reality is.

I’m curious if anyone else has had experiences like this, where they have discovered a kintype and then later discovered source material that matched it. If that’s something that’s happened to you, I’d be really thrilled to hear you share about it.

Hello I hope you're feeling better soon and please a - z for naoya and the nsfw alphabet hehe I'm greedy for Naoya content. Sending love and hugs

Thank you~❤️I'm doing okay, still recovering but I was well enough to finish this. I hope the wait was worth it! Some of these letters were already answered for other people, so I'll be linking back to the posts where I put them. Otherwise, here you are, a full alphabet for our favourite little menace of the Zenin clan:

These are gn!Reader friendly!

As one could expect, MDNI, thank you!~ Specific warnings under the cut.

C/D1/K/W1 & B/D2/J/N/W2

Warnings: Mentions of cum, katoptronophilia, limited aftercare, oral sex (both receiving), rough sex, mocking, degradation, humiliation, praise, choking, implied unprotected sex, creampies/cumming inside, detailed descriptions of uncircumcised dick, semi-public sex, quickies, exhibitionism, descriptions of pubic hair, use of toys, sexting, dick pics, overstimulation, dumbification, multiple orgasms, and orgasm denial. Also if there are grammar and spelling mistakes, I’m sorry but I didn’t have the energy to proof read this a million times lol.

A = Aftercare: Aftercare with Naoya is...minimalistic, really. If he’s awake enough after sex, he’ll probably want to wash off with you so that you don’t have to worry about yourself or your bed sheets in the morning, though. This can be a shower or a bath and he doesn’t really have a preference, so if you just want a quick rinse that’s fine & if you’d like to put some scented bath salts in the tub and just soak for a bit, that also works. He’s not really picky during this time (in fact, Post-orgasm Naoya is probably the most agreeable version of him lmao). Anything more than this is a bit of a toss-up, however. He’s probably just gonna want to go straight to bed or he’ll have to even skip the wash, adjust himself, and head off to whatever he has next on his daily agenda. But, if he does get to stay in bed for the night, expect him to also use whatever power he has to sleep in with you the next day.

D = Dirty secret: This is one that even a very beloved partner would have significant difficulty wrangling out of him.....but Naoya really doesn’t mind the idea of wearing lingerie, even if it’s a bit more on the feminine side. He has a great figure and he knows it. What’s more is that he loves all kinds of accessories that accentuate his naturally pretty features. So it should come as no surprise to learn that Naoya has definitely tried on a few things in front of his mirror, and somewhere deep in his computer are the selfies he took while wearing the pieces he liked most. He’s especially partial to black garments with lace trim and lots of straps & garters. Perhaps even more than the lingerie itself, he loves thinking of all the praise and compliments he’ll receive for wearing it. So his partner had better be prepared to absolutely drown him in heartfelt flattery if this is a thing they’d like to see more of in the future.

E = Experience: Naoya isn't very experienced, in my opinion. I do think that he'd be willing to have a few one-night-stands here and there just to get out some of the frustration that he can't relieve himself, but that doesn't mean he was all that well-educated on what to do. He's not innocent by any means, but being with him means being willing to understand that he'll need some actual practice to be exceptional at anything in the bedroom. His one strength is that he does have some natural talent with his tongue and fingers, though, if you get my drift. It's a learning curve, but he'll get there. F = Favorite position: I’m of the mind that Naoya enjoys the butterfly, cowgirl, classic missionary, and spooning positions best. Ultimately, these are all positions that either 1) let him see his partner’s face & body, 2) let him press his skin directly against theirs, or 3) both. A position that allows Naoya to choose between getting up close and sensual or leaning back and enjoying the view is going to land on his favourites every time. All four of these also allow him to have good control over the pace to some extent or another (which we’ll establish later as being fairly important to him). Even cowgirl gives him the option to steady his partner’s hips and push into them at his desired speed from below. An honourable mention here is doggy style, but he tends to only like it while him and his partner are facing a mirror. Like I said, he likes to be able to see everything.

G = Goofy: Naoya doesn't tend to be goofy during the act, per se, but he does enjoy bringing his normal scoundrel attitude into the bedroom with him. He's the mocking, sarcastic, and teasing sort. At times, it can also just be him playing coy in an attempt to get his partner to admit to/beg for something they want done to them. He's the kind to hear his partner say "please..." and ask "please, what?" even though he knows full well what it is they're looking for. Playful, to say the least. We’ll get more into this when we get to U.

H = Hair: While the idea of Naoya also bleaching his pubes is...interesting to me, I do think that he keeps them the natural black colour they are. As far as the cut goes, I’d say he’s very well groomed. He keeps it well-shaped and tame down there, sometimes he might even shave it completely if he’s going to be too busy to see to it properly for a while. He does also take into account what his partner likes, though, as he wants to make sure he’s as attractive to them as he can be in every possible way. Tell him what you like and, if it suits him, he’ll do his best.

I = Intimacy: Let’s face it, Naoya’s not the romantic type. While he can be tender, it’s rare that there’s a time with Naoya that isn’t punctuated by roughness or mockery to some extent or another. But that doesn’t mean that there isn’t something deeper to it at all. More accurately, Naoya’s roughness is largely due to his enthusiasm to be wrapped up with his partner in the first place. Obviously, his nigh insatiable appetite is also to blame, but it’s not the only contributor to his eagerness. When Naoya desires someone, he desires them wholly, and he seeks no one else. So while his partner probably shouldn’t expect a soft/romantic lovemaking session unless it’s their birthday or some such occasion, they should know that everything Naoya does is specifically, and only for them. It has its own inherent romance to it, even if it’s not always clear.

L = Location: There a few different locations that Naoya loves to get tangled up in. His own bed, the estate sauna, the training mats in the dojo - they're all great and he'll almost never say no to them. But there's one place that Naoya absolutely loves to defile with his partner more than any other:

His father's bed.

It's risky and he knows well that it's not always an option, but if there's ever a moment in which his partner is game and Naobito is busy elsewhere, Naoya will practically sprint there. The whole way he's biting his lip at the thought and loosening his clothes to prevent lost time. He can't help but to love the high that comes over him when he and his partner have their way in the Very Important Private Room Only for the Head of the Zenin Clan. It serves as both a reminder of his own personal motivations, as well as just a giant "Fuck You" to his father in general. The best of both worlds. M = Motivation: Naoya isn’t a difficult man to turn on, as he’s practically always at the ready. You can pretty much just vaguely allude to the concept of sex and his brows (and something else) will begin to perk up. However, I do think there are a few little things that will get him particularly entranced with his s/o. One of them is low-cut or revealing clothing. Parade yourself with confidence or tease him with a suggestive outfit and he’s already ravishing you with his eyes at every possible moment. Naoya loves beauty and ostentation, so if his partner takes the time to pick out clothes that really highlight all their best curves & features, you can bet that Naoya isn’t going to be able to keep his hands to himself. For male/masc partner’s especially, I think he also loves shows of strength. Naoya can’t help but stare when he sees taught muscle flexing, or be impressed by how easily his partner can lift heavy objects that he can’t (as I’m writing this, I’m thinking maybe maybe maybe Naoya might just have a bit of a size kink, too eheh). Finally, something that works for all kinds of s/os is that Naoya absolutely loves having his neck touched - it’s probably his most sensitive, non-erogenous body part. If the person he’s involved with at the time comes up behind him while he’s sitting on a couch or at his desk, gently grazes their fingers along the side of his neck, and whispers something suggestive in his ear, Naoya’s all but putty in their hands.

O = Oral: Oh, Naoya, Naoya, Naoya. When isn’t this man wagging his tongue? Honestly, even he knows that he really ought to put it to better use sometimes. And so he does, but you almost hate to admit that he’s so damn good at it. As one could imagine, it’s filled with a ton of teasing, though. There’s plenty of him blowing lightly on the excited skin, lots of kitten licks and soft kisses, and of course it wouldn’t be sex with Naoya without a heavy dose of “use your words” and other taunts. Ultimately, there’s not much Naoya Zenin loves more than really taking his time between his partner’s thighs and watching as they completely come unraveled beneath his diligent tongue. It’s so good to him, that he’s often caught moaning around his partner’s sex, sending pleasant vibrations all along the flesh there & enhancing the experience further. Sometimes, even, he can’t bring himself to stop after his s/o’s release finishes coating his lips, and he’ll continue to press his tongue against them until they’re jolting from overstimulation. Even then he might not stop without a safeword. Asking Naoya for oral really is a gamble in that way. There’s no telling whether he’ll leave his partner at a comfortable satisfied, or catapult them thoroughly into mindless and exhausted.

Naoya prefers to give and, honestly, if he had to choose the method to his climax, he’d just choose sex over oral if he had the time. That being said, Naoya was made for multiple orgasms. So if there’s only enough time for oral, expect for him to try and make use of every possible second. Therefore, his partner should probably make sure they rest their jaw afterwards.

P = Pace: Generally speaking, Naoya prefers the act to have a more rapid pace. As one can expect from someone with a speed-based technique, Naoya has a great capacity to keep things moving quickly. The bedroom is no exception. Even in moments where the scene is more sensual, he can’t help but raise the pace as time goes on. There’s something about the extra friction and the desperation it fills him with that makes the sex all the more passionate in his eyes. Just him and his partner, recklessly chasing their highs together. Mmm.~ ♡

Q = Quickie: Naoya loves quickies, for the most part. He kind of has to, seeing as he has to always be somewhere for some reason or another. His partner can probably expect at least one each week in-between blocks of missions, meetings, and other monotony. Sometimes it's the only kind of sex there is, which is mostly fine for him....but he does sometimes long for the more calm, slow moments when he can really take his time. A balance between the two, is really what he craves. R = Risk: Naoya is very willing to experiment and take risks, as I'm sure you've probably guessed by this point. He's down to try almost anything once, and some of his favourite acts are ones done in places where it would be easy to be caught. The things he likes are also pretty varied, and he doesn't mind going from soft to harsh or anywhere in between. Ultimately a pretty exciting partner once he starts getting the hang of things. S = Stamina: I’ve talked about this before in separate posts, but I think it’s fair to say that Naoya likely has pretty good stamina. I don’t necessarily like when other people just say that every character they write for can go multiple rounds all night because that’s not always realistic. But, since Naoya so very specifically has a speed-based ability and we know how important strength, performance, and training were to the Zenin...I don’t think it’s unfair to say in this case that, yes, Naoya can probably go for quite some time. I’m also of the mind that he cums quickly, but is not easily overstimulated, leading him to be able to hit multiple orgasms without getting too overwhelmed or tired. Ergo, this man can and will keep you up way past your bedtime if you ask nicely. ♡

T = Toys: I like to think that Naoya is pretty open to the possibility of using toys. After all, they can very easily result in a heightened experience for both him and his partner. He’d especially love using things like vibrators, clamps, and plugs because of how readily they can bring his s/o over the edge and deep into overstimulation. And since he’s someone who also likes to cum multiple times in any given session, I can definitely see them as being useful to him, too. Ultimately, I think this is a “you name it and I’ll try it,” sort of subject for Naoya. He’ll give anything a go at least once.

U = Unfair: Oh, are you kidding? I think we’ve established by now that teasing may as well be Naoya’s own, distinct love language. It’s impossible for him to refrain from denying, teasing, and openly mocking his s/o during any stage of sex. For him, it’s an integral part of the fun. He loves to make his partner beg, to mock their whimpering, to intentionally “miss” any of their sweet spots, and to give only the slightest of touches against the skin for far too long. Bringing his partner to the brink and sinking them down over and over again - having them completely at his mercy...oh yeah, he positively adores it all.

V = Volume: I think this is where I differ the most from a lot of other people who write for him, because I absolutely think that Naoya is shameless enough to fully moan whenever the mood strikes him. No hushed grunting or strangled noises with this man. He will just let it all out exactly as he feels it. After all, Naoya’s not a person to conceal his emotions as is. Why would he bother to hide what a good time he’s having? Plus, if you’ve been around my posts long enough, you know full well that I think he would also really enjoy trying to embarrass his partner by repeating their own sounds back to them when they get particularly amusing. So, really, there’s no way I would have ever told you that this man is quiet, of all things. Lmao.

W = Wild card: Naoya loves to lock his partner in place, especially when he’s close to cumming. This can sometimes be in the form of choking, but other times it’s just him pressing closer against them or wrapping an arm across the chest/sternum to anchor them to him. It’s quite the display, really. A hand or arm will come up to curl around his s/o’s body, his pace will quicken, and his breathing grows ragged. He has almost no mind left for dirty talk and simply moans readily into his partner’s ear as he reaches his peak inside them. The whole time, he’s holding them firmly in place and making sure they take every drop of his seed.

X = X-ray: He’s beauty, he’s grace. Naoya’s overall body is lean, fit, and sculpted. His musculature is more on the subtle end, but each gentle slope and rounded hill is wrapped so perfectly in smooth, even skin. His ass is especially noteworthy, as it is that somewhat square shape with divots in the sides that one can expect from a very fit build, but also with enough mass there to give the actual cheeks that lovely & grab-able bubble-like quality. Truly, it’s an enticing thing that any good partner would be loathe not to appreciate. Rotating the man a bit, let’s talk about what he’s workin’ with, you know what I’m sayin’? 👀 Naoya’s a proud member of the Pretty Cock Squad, in my opinion. It’s not particularly large or small, sitting at about a comfortable 6-6.5 inches. He is uncircumcised and almost religiously clean. His foreskin is about the same colour as the rest of him, but with a red, blushing quality to it. It’s also very smooth & soft to the touch. There are no veins visible, save for a single prominent, raised one along the underside that looks almost like a seam turned out. The head underneath is cutely rounded, very pink, and super sensitive - which is largely why he cums so fast. Overall, it’s a member to be proud of, and he’ll certainly take any opportunity he can to show it off to his partner. Hopefully they like dick pics during sexting!

Y = Yearning: Oh, boy. This man is horny 24/7, babe. It’s honestly a wonder that Naoya isn’t trying to chase his high every moment of every day. If he isn’t engaging in a sexual act himself, he’s probably thinking of the kinds he’d like to be involved in later, or ones he’ll think about with more clarity when he has a moment alone. So any time a partner even jokes about getting intimate, Naoya will be there actively hoping that they mean what they say deep down because he’s already thinking about just how he’d like to do it tonight.

Z = Zzz: Conked out immediately. Naoya can last quite a while, but no matter how high your stamina is, there comes a point where you need to stop for a bit. It's actually because Naoya is able to exert so much energy during the act that he needs sleep so badly after. Don't be surprised if you roll over to snuggle up to him sometimes only to hear him softly snoring away. Just make sure you wake him up at some point so he can brush his teeth!

Okay! With that all being said and done, I’m gonna tag you ( @depechemoth ) as well just to make sure you get it since sometimes tumblr doesn’t tell people when their asks get answered anymore + I spent a lot of time on this so I don’t want you to miss it!

What're some of your favorite moments between Doof and Perry during Phineas and Ferb?

You have absolutely no idea how fucking long I spent making this video fhdsjahkjaf I’m gonna gush under the cut about why I liked each one so y’all don’t have to deal with me if you don’t want to lol

These are in no particular order. They’re just numbered to line up with the reasoning. I added lil descriptions to each of them but you’ll probably have to either watch the video first or have a pretty good memory of the show to understand them lol

1. “Dr. Wexler, you’re a platypus?” (A Hard Day’s Knight)

Literally just the way he says, “Dr. Wexler, you’re a platypus?”

2. “Is every platypus named Perry?” and then Perry bites him (AT2D)

M O N C H (also Heinz calls him cute) (also also “We do not bite the elderly!”)

3. Perry tries to fly him and Heinz home from the desert but Heinz flips the turbo switch and they lose the jetpack (Road to Danville)

“Like you didn’t know about my switch-flipping compulsion!” They’re literally an old married couple omfg I can’t even (also moment of appreciation for the fact that they’re close enough that Heinz just assumes Perry knows about his switch-flipping compulsion) (another moment of appreciation because Perry probably does)

4. The end of the Perry/Doof subplot of Terrifying Tri-State Trilogy of Terror

First of all, the way Perry decides to run under his giant floating head when going around would take two extra seconds? Beautiful. And, of course, Perry’s fucking smirk because that’s just not his problem lmaooo

5. The pause in the FIGHT FIGHT IT’S A PLATYPUS FIGHT (Doofapus)

I love that they literally just stop mid-fight to have tea. I firmly believe there is no other pair of nemeses that would do that and this is just how Heinz and Perry work. Also, Perry’s smile? He feels so understood? It’s so pure?

6. Vanessa lets Perry in before he can break down the door with his rocket launcher and then Perry accidentally shoots it through the wall (My Sweet Ride)

“This is why I can never have anything nice -_-”

7. Heinz doesn’t trap Perry (Road to Danville)

He’s so confused fjdahfksdhfak he literally goes out of his way to get trapped at that point (even if he pretends he doesn’t) and Heinz flipped the script on him without telling him and his lil shrug is so cute and I just jsfhkjadhsk

8. There’s a Platypus Controlling Me (Brain Drain)

You had to know this one was gonna be there

9. “In your letters, you said your nemesis was a suave, semi-aquatic personification of unstoppable dynamic fury” (Oil on Candace)

The fact that Heinz sent his ex-professor a letter gushing about his nemesis is just *chef’s kiss*

10. Perry and Dennis are fighting in giant puppets in the street and Heinz recognizes Perry piloting the puppet because of his fighting style (The Return of the Rogue Rabbit)

I’m pretty sure this is the only time Heinz ever recognizes Perry without his hat on (correct me if I’m wrong tho) and the fact that it’s literally just because Perry punched the fuckin camera kills me every time

11. Heinz is worried they won’t make his play in time so Perry tells him to flip the turbo switch (Road to Danville)

Perry just trusts him so much??? Flipping the switch was what got them into that mess in the first place??? But Perry cares so much about Heinz making his LOVEMUFFIN play that he’s willing to give it another go??? I love it???

12. DANCE BABY DANCE BABY HANDS IN THE AIR (Candace Disconnected)

I feel like we don’t get to see Perry just kinda hanging out like that a lot. He’s always doing that steely glare, even when they’re having fun. I don’t think Perry really realizes how emotionless he can look sometimes (the beginning and end of Sidetracked are from Perry’s POV especially at the end, the way he acts with the boys shows too much character for a secret agent, so even though he seems to think it’s obvious that he’s all lovey dovey with them, he does much too good a job at hiding his emotions) but it’s nice to see him drop the facade every now and then

13. Heinz calls Monogram because Perry hasn’t shown up (Perry the Actorpus)

I know Perry’s not technically in this one but I love that Heinz a) calls OWCA when Perry doesn’t show up and b) looks so nervous as he calls OWCA because Perry hasn’t shown up

14. Perry brings Heinz a glass of water (Road to Danville)

Half this episode is just them being mad at each other because they blame the other one for sticking them in the desert with way home, and I love that even though Perry’s been fuming pretty much the entire time, the second Heinz actually starts yelling at him, he’s immediately hit with a wave of guilt (also I love that he somehow found a glass of water in the middle of the desert?)

15. “YOU PEED ON MY COUCH!” (AT2D)

Not gonna lie, I mostly picked this one for shits and giggles BUT that doesn’t mean I can’t overanalyze it because that’s what I do best. Perry’s whole role in the show is to tie together the two completely unrelated plots, and that’s only so entertaining because not only does neither side know the other, but neither side knows what version of Perry the other side knows. This is the first time Heinz has really connected mindless pet Perry with Agent P Perry, and I feel like that was the most interesting part of the movie was that Phineas, Ferb, Candace, and Heinz all saw a side of Perry they didn’t know. 

16. Heinz invites Perry out for lunch (The Quietest Day Ever)

Heinz doesn’t even know he got hit with the de-handsome-inator. He literally just thinks he lost, and his immediate reaction is to ask if Perry wants to hang out. I just love those lil insights into their relationship when they’re not fighting. Also, perry.exe has stopped working.

17. Honestly just all of Father’s Day

I hate knowing that chronologically, Father’s Day had to happen probably less than halfway through the summer and not towards the end like it does in the episode order. It’s such a sweet turning point in their relationship. Perry’s head all these horrible backstories about Mr. Doofenshmirtz and I can only assume he hates the guy, but he’s still so supportive of Heinz trying to win his approval -- and he’s supportive when that fails and Heinz needs someone to lean on.

18. Perry Lays An Egg

T H W A R T   M E   P E R R Y   T H E   P L A T Y P U S 

19. Heinz proving he knows how to shut the fuck up by refusing to shut the fuck up (Road to Danville)

Perry’s literally about to fight a bitch and I can’t blame him. I also like the lil look into Heinz’s thoughts with the “it’s not like I have to fill the space” line because it really explains a lot about him.

20. Perry waiting for the New Year’s ball to drop and for Heinz to finish his scheme (Happy New Year!)

Once again, a beautiful look at how their entire relationship is based on their routine and knowing what to expect. It wouldn’t be Heinz and Perry if there was not punching and kicking involved. (Also, Perry’s smug face while he waits) (Also also, Perry’s lil shrug)

21. Heinz invites Perry to hang out in his house in the suburbs (Put That Putter Away)

GIVE PERRY A DAY OFF (but for real I love that Heinz literally just asked if he wanted to hang out, AND that he assured Perry that he’d make sure he didn’t get in trouble with Monogram for it)

22. The end of Sidetracked

THEY? HOLD? HAND???

23. “The thing that’s kept me from succeeding all these years is YOU!” *turns finger around* (Road to Danville)

PERRY IS SO DONE WITH HIS SHlT I CAN’T FDJAFHDJLSFHDSAKJ

24. Roger tries to say hi to sleeping Perry (Just Our Luck)

How often does Perry have to fall asleep around Heinz for the guy to know he gets testy when someone wakes him up?

25. The brief New Year’s dance break (Happy New Year!)

THEIR DANCING IS SO FAST AND SO IN SYNC EITHER THEY REHEARSED THIS OR THEY JUST KNOW EACH OTHER SO WELL THAT IT JUST HAPPENS NATURALLY AND I WOULD DIE FOR THEM OKAY

26. Perry accidentally became famous for advertising tools and then shows up at DEI (Perry the Actorpus)

He’s so happy to see his nemesis again :,)

27. “You think I’m evil, right?” *finger guns* (Oil on Candace)

Perry is at least partially responsible for how horribly that day went, but that’s his job is to make sure evil scientists don’t impress other evil scientists. You don’t want, like, an evil scientist team up or whatever. But I’m decently sure there’s nothing in the job description that says Perry has to stick around and assure his nemesis that he’s good at being evil, so that’s all Perry’s doing.

28. Perry pulled an all nighter and shows up at DEI asleep and Heinz has to try not to wake him up (Just Our Luck)

The amount of respect it takes for Heinz to see his nemesis sleeping on the job and go out of his way not to wake him up (but to make sure he’s still included, of course; he’s not a disrespectful guy, even if he is evil) warms my heart

29. Perry shows Heinz a bunch of their pictures together (This Is Your Backstory)

a) I love that Perry carries those pictures in his wallet 

b) I love that those pictures exist at all

 c) I love that Heinz has enjoyed his nemesisship with Perry so much that it basically negates every tragic backstory

Morning Ride

fem!Reader x Park Jimin

Word Count: 1,902

Genre: Smut (w/ some crack)

Rating: Mature 

Warning: grinding, dry humping, car sex, nipple play, public sex, sexual humiliation, numerous mentions of Jimin’s juicy lips lol

[A/N: So this story really came out of nowhere. Please forgive me if this comes off as super cringy, I tried my best with this one. Oh and you might notice that I’m kinda obsessed with Jimin’s lips lmao Please feel free to leave any kind of feedback.]

You were contently eating your blueberry bagel, waiting for the guys to pick you up for school. It had just turned 10 am so you knew they should be on their way. Unlike Taehyung, Jungkook and your boyfriend Jimin, your classes don't actually begin until the afternoon. It was just more convenient to wake up early and tag along with them. While the guys attended their classes, you usually just spent time in the university's library reading a book or studying.

As you sipped your lukewarm green tea, you finally received the text you were expecting. 

Jiminie: We're here. Come outside

On that note, you quickly finished your bagel, slipped on your shoes, grabbed your bag and headed out the door. 

You reflexively covered your eyes with your hand to shield it from the bright, mid-morning sun as you walked towards Taehyung's gaudy purple car. While the car was nice, you never understand why he chose the color purple for it. "It looks like something a pimp would drive, dude," you clowned him when he first got it. But seeing that he would be gracious enough to give you and the gang rides, you refrain from further making fun of it. At least not to his face. 

You gave the guys a little wave as you were approaching and they waved back. With Taehyung driving, Jungkook was in the passenger seat beside him. Leaving your boyfriend, Jimin, the love of your life, in the backseat behind Jungkook. You see him smile brightly as you walk towards them; even after 3 years of dating, his smile never fails to make you feel tingly inside. 

As usual, you get around behind the car to sit on the other side of the car. 

"Wait, Y/N, there's-," you hear Taehyung say to you from his opened window but you had already opened the car door. Expecting to see a free spot next to your boyfriend, all you see is a huge block of metal in your way. 

"What the hell is this?," you asked Taehyung. 

"Oh that's my safe," he answers matter of factly. You took another look at the metal box and it was, indeed, a safe.

"Okay better question: why do you have a safe?" 

"So I can keep stuff in it. Duh." He responds, as if that was the most obvious answer in the world. 

"Can you please move it to the trunk or something?" It was too early to deal with your friend's eccentricities. 

Taehyung shakes his head. "No, it weighs a fuck ton. You'll just have to sit on Jimin's lap." 

"What?!" Not only you knew that option was illegal and potentially dangerous, you also knew the type of person your boyfriend was. One word: handsy. 

"Come on, y/n!," you hear Jungkook whined from the passenger seat. "Just get in, we're gonna be late for philosophy and I really don't wanna be berated by Professor Lee again." 

Feeling defeated, you slammed the door shut and walked around towards Jimin's side. Once you opened his door, you find Jimin giving you a cheeky smile. He pats his tights and says to you in a playful tone, "Well hop in, honey." You huffed at him but it's not like you had a choice. 

You carefully sild into the car and sat on his lap. As Taehyung starts to drive again, you turned your head back to Jimin. "No funny business, you understand?," you whisper. But he just give you a smile, the mischievous kind where you know he's going to be up to no good. 

During the drive, you listen to Jungkook rant about how much of a weirdo Prof. Lee was. You were laughing at Jungkook's insistent whining when you started to feel something on your back. It felt soft and warm, it doesn't take you long to realize that you were feeling Jimin's lips pressed against the fabric of the shirt.

"Dammit, Jimin," you cursed in your head. You were about to turn around and silently scold him but the feel of him leaving delicate kisses on your back was so heavenly, it stops you. You tried your best to ignore his kisses and listen to your friends' conversation. However, it was super difficult to focus due to your boyfriend peppering your back with his soft lips. As he was doing just that, Jimin began to grip your hips, which immediately made you reminisce of the countless times you would lose yourself while frantically riding him reverse cowgirl style. With that, you couldn't help yourself but respond to his actions by slowly grinding on him. You tried your best to be subtle since it would be more than embarrassing if Taehyung and Jungkook found out the two of you are practically dry humping on the backseat. 

When you thought this gratifying torture wouldn't end, you and guys finally arrive at school. As Taehyung finds and parks in an empty spot, you feel Jimin leave one more lingering and loving kiss and wrap his arms around you. You honestly want to stay in that moment but second the engine stopped, you had to get out. You quickly got off Jimin and out of the car, so he can get off and for you to cool down your flustered state. Even though the fresh air does feel good on your hot skin, you were still incredibly horny and you needed to think of a way to relieve it. 

"Um, Tae," you called out for him as he got out of the car, "is it alright if I could take a nap in your car? I didn't really sleep well last night and I could use some rest." 

Taehyung looks at you quizzically. "Aren't you heading to the library? Just take a nap there. Jungkook does it all the time." 

Jungkook nods. "Surprisingly their encyclopedias make great pillows." 

"Actually, the librarians are cracking down on renegade nappers and kicking them out," you lied. 

"Well," Taehyung hesitates but you shoot him your signature pouty puppy dog look, knowing it will soften him. And you succeeded. 

"Okay, okay," he says annoyed, "just remember to lock the door when you leave." 

"Thanks, Tae," you give him a small smile. 

As you watch the boys walk towards the campus, Jimin stops and turns his head to you. He winks, indicating that he knows your plan and starts to walk away again You feel your face getting hot again. 

You got in the passenger seat and put up Taehyung's sun reflectors to block each window. When you're done, you slide off your already partially damp panties and toss them in the back.

It was going to take awhile so you just leaned back and closed your eyes, causing you to actually drift off a bit. You were then woken up by a tap of the window glass on the driver's side. You unlocked the door and Jimin quickly got inside. 

"Sorry, it took me so long. I had to wait for the Professor Lee to be well into the lecture." Jimin slightly lifts himself up above his seat and pulls down his jeans and boxers, with his erect pens already springing up. 

"Oh," you said in a rather flattered tone, "I didn't think you wanted me that much." 

"Of course, Y/N," Jimin blushes a bit,"the minute I found out you had to sit on me during the drive, I knew I was a goner." 

Seeing Jimin's sudden bashfulness, compared to his bold actions from before, made your heart fluttered. And somehow it made you even more aroused. 

As you lifted yourself up from the passenger seat, you hiked your skirt up and carefully straddled onto Jimin's bare lap. Slowly and teasingly, you slide yourself down until you completely engorged Jimin's rigid cock. 

"Ah," a low moan escaped your throat. Placing your hands on Jimin's body shoulders, you begin to rock your hips back and forth. You gradually pick up the pace, causing you to pant and moan vigorously. 

"You drive me so fucking crazy, you know that?," you lamented, having trouble steadying your voice. 

You watch Jimin's eyes flutter, lost in total ecstasy. "Isn't that the point, Pop Tart?"

Like earlier, you felt Jimin grip your hips tightly. He pushes himself further inside, matching your rhythm. 

"Fuck, Y/N," Jimin groans, "Unbutton your shirt." 

Obediently, you untucked your button up blouse from your skirt and swiftly unbuttoned it, exposing your pink-white polka dot bra. 

Jimin lifts up his hands from your waist and begins to grope your breasts firmly. You throw your head back in pleasure as Jimin kneads your chest and rubs your peaked nips through the fabric of your bra. Not being able to take the teasing any longer, you unhooked your bra in seconds, causing your breasts to spill out and jiggle inches from Jimin’s face. 

As if without thinking, Jimin pulls you towards him and takes one of your tits in his mouth. The feel of Jimin’s supple lips on your nipple and his tongue swirling around it makes your mind go fuzzy. You rock yourself faster and deeper onto Jimin’s cock, clenching your sides around him. 

Jimin stops sucking your nip and leans back in his seat. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he moans breathlessly, “Just like that, baby.”

The air in the car was starting to getting thick with your heated breaths and the familiar aromatic scent of sex. The lack of fresh air was making you feel a bit lightheaded but that somehow made this tryst even more erotic. 

You feel your core tightening, sensing your orgasm arriving. You lean into Jimin, tightly gripping his shoulders, preparing for the feeling of fireworks exploding throughout your body. 

But instead, you feel the rush of cool air as the driver is opened wide. To your horror, you and Jimin turn your heads to find an extremely displeased Taehyung. 

“What the fuck are you two doing in my car?!,” he shouts. 

“What do you think we’re doing, genius?,” Jimin retorts. 

Taehyung's eyes darken in anger. “Both of you, out now-.” 

Before he could finish his sentence, as the situation wasn’t humiliating enough, you unexpectedly found your body writhing from one of the most explosive orgasms you ever had. 

“Ah!,” you loudly moan, involuntarily rolling your hips to ride out the pleasure. 

Taehyung freezes in place, not believing what he just witnessed. 

You then proceed to feel Jimin’s cock twitch and thrust deeply inside you, moaning audibly for Taehyung to hear as well. 

“Ugh! You two are fucking gross!,” you hear Taehyung yells before slamming the door shut. 

After a moment reeling from your intense climaxes, the both of you looked at each and burst out laughing. 

“Oh my god,” you said, face palming, “I can’t that just happened. I’m so embarrassed.” 

Jimin smiles at you. “Yeah, me too. But at least it felt good, right?” 

You smiled back at him and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. “Yeah, really good.” Cupping his face, you leaned in once again to kiss him more passionately. You savored the feel of Jimin’s ever soft, buttery lips, the same lips that never fails to drive you absolutely wild. 

You both knew for the rest of the day and possibly week, Taehyung was going to continue unleashing his wrath towards you two. But really, it was his fault for leaving that stupid safe in the backseat. 

I'm having one of those "I miss Lysander so fucking much, I need him back" nights :(. (I'll never forgive Beemov for taking him away). So... Can I get some fluffy headcanons for Lys at UL? They can be about whatever you want to💖

I FEEL YOUR PAIN LYSANDER IS AND ALWAYS WILL BE MY BABY

I added some general UL Lys headcanons as well, hope you dont mind~

Fluffy UL Lysander headcanons

So for University!Lys, I’d really like to think that he’d grow his hair out to be a little longer. Not tremendously long but maybe to his shoulders, and he would wear it in a low ponytail, of course his bangs are still in his face. He normally would keep up with cutting it but after a while he just stopped caring, and of course it helped a lot when you expressed that you like his new hair length. Sometimes he’ll cut it back to his normal length again, especially when it gets hot outside. Either way he’s still a beautiful man lololol

In my personal opinion I full heartedly believe Lysander would sell his farm eventually and come back to society. He kept it solely for the emotional ties he had to it because of his parents, the memories, etc. He was sad and didn’t want to let go. But he got to a point where he realized that there was no way in hell he wanted to be a farmer all his life. He sold it to whoever, goes up to visit every now and then but other than that he’s done with the place. He’ll come back and enroll in school, what his major is I’m not sure yet. Something musical or writing involved.

Now onto the relationship aspect of you two <3

One of Lysander’s favorite things to do is walk you to class in the morning. I feel like he would probably live off campus (since he would most likely get annoyed with a roommate and the lack of privacy) so he drives to school extra early so that he can be there to walk you around. It’s cheesy and you always tell him he doesn’t have to do this but he always dismisses what you say, he likes doing it, and it’s also partially him just being protective. Normally campuses are a lot bigger than they are in the game (at least where i live) so he probably even drives you around as well depending on how far the building you have to go to is. He does prefer walking though because it gives you both time to catch up a bit throughout your busy schedules. Just being able to hold your hand and chit chat is one of his favorite parts of the day.

With him living alone he probably invites you over a lot, and depending on how far your relationship goes you’d more than likely move in with him at some point. So it goes from him showing up to walk you to class, to you both getting ready in the morning side by side. Brushing your teeth together, showering together, having your morning coffee. They are simple but intimate things that mean a lot to him. Of course you don’t do this every single morning but the mornings you do he takes in every moment of it. Once you get to campus and have to go your separate ways he never lets you leave without a kiss. Lysander is a private man so of course he’s not fully making out with you, but he still needs his goodbye kiss >:( Whether it’s a kiss on the cheek, forehead, lips, hand. Just a kiss pls.

If you still choose to stay in your dorm, expect lots of random love notes with flowers attached being sent to your dorm on the days he knows he won’t be able to walk you. It’s nothing extravagant because that isn’t his style but that doesn’t make it any less sweet. He’ll write a quick paragraph, maybe saying something like “I’m sorry that I won’t be able to walk you to class this morning, but I’ll be there for sure tomorrow morning. I love you, have a great day my love~ Lys” with your favorite flower attached. Simple, but loving.

He looooves study dates. Even if your subjects are completely unrelated he loves just being around you. Lysander is definitely the type of partner that you don’t need to actively be doing anything with to enjoy spending time with them. You get your homework done in peace, and if you’re struggling with anything he helps as much as he can. Don’t ask him for math help though, just don’t. 

Yes he still loses his notebook around campus, it’s gotten to the point where you’ve attached a tracker to the cover of it. 

During your free time or lunch break at work he always stops by just to check up on you, and he even helps you at the cafe sometimes. He doesn’t care if he isn’t getting paid (and neither does Clemence lololol) he just wants to take the load off your back if it’s too busy. He might stop in with lunch for you two to eat on your break. You might slide him a free drink here and there, which he never asks you for but it’s always appreciated. Even when you say it’s on you though he still tries to pay for it lol. 

He is ALWAYS there to pick you up when you’re done with your shift, especially if it’s dark and you’re closing alone. He shows up a bit early in case you happen to get done faster than normal, but he’s never bothered if closing takes a little more time than usual and will offer to help you clean up so you guys can get home.

Lysander does have a habit of forgetting his homework assignments at home so every night you pack his bag and make sure everything is in there before you guys leave out the door the next morning. You’ve saved his ass on more than one occasion lmao if it weren’t for you he might be failing one or two classes xD

I know Castiel and Nate are kind of the Campus studs around here but I wouldn’t doubt that Lysander would have his own small group of people who have major crushes on him. Of course, he never notices because the only person he cares about in that way is you. He never hesitates to shut a person down when they ask him out, politely of course but still firmly, and he lets them know that he isn’t available.

misukazu 21

(if you saw me fuck up the other one no you didnt)

EDIT I THINK THIS ONE GOT A LITTLE FUCKED UP TOO BUT IT’S... READABLE...

questions from this post, and answers originally written for this thread!!

If you had to change the pairing’s very first meeting, how would you change it?    their canon first meeting is already so good SHDGFLJASHG but if i had to choose a different one that's still within the context of mankai... meeting as kids and losing touch and coming back together completely different at mankai

What song fits your pairing the most?    uhhHHhhHHH i don't have a real answer but i do have a partial playlist for one of my misukazu aus and the only two songs in it are furaregai girl by sayuri and champagne's for celebrating by mayday parade and i feel like that says enough sldhgalsdhfalsh

What is your favorite AU/prompt idea/trope for your pairing?     ALL MISUKAZU AUS ARE GOOD but. i really love any au where their first meeting is in the future and both are still kind of lost but they're Older and it's hard to let themselves fall into the easy trust they find in canon. i just think that'd be neat.

Do you prefer canon ideas or do you have your own headcanons for them?     I'VE SAID THIS MANY TIMES BUT CANON MISUKAZU GIVES OFF MADE FOR EACH OTHER VIBES AND USUALLY I DON'T VIBE WITH THAT BUT THEY REALLY ARE WHAT THE OTHER NEEDS... AND I THINK EVEN IF THEY HAD TO PART THEY'D STILL BE ABLE TO BE BETTER PEOPLE BC THEY HAD MET

Favorite canon moment of them?     THERE ARE SO MANY but the one that immediately comes to mind is misumi carrying drunk kazu to bed (latest bday line) because drunk kazu is so soft and it implies that misumi wanted to wish happy birthday to kazu pretty late... what did he want to give him...

Least favorite canon moment of them?     hmm... there's not really one i can think of??? IM SORRY I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY I LOVE ALL THEIR CANON MOMENTS

Favorite headcanon trope/idea? (Your own or someone else’s)    this is somehow both vague and very specific but i think misukazu gives off this vibe: He's beautiful. I can't tell him. or "Kazu is always beautiful~" Don't call me that, Kazu thinks. I'm not. so... insecurities i guess ????? AJSHAJJD

Favorite aspect of them/their relationship dynamics?     THIS IS GOING TO SOUND SO CHEESY but i love how /real/ they allow themselves to be around each other. misukazu at their best is when one thinks "you're you. and i love that you" and the other knows this. i just. THEY VALIDATE THE OTHER SO MUCH CRIES

Least favorite aspect of them/their relationship dynamics? (Can be headcannon)     this isn't a "least fav" so much as "it makes me sad" but if either of them showed any sign of not being interested anymore the other is more likely to give up then push anything. sort of like "it was bound to happen, so i'll enjoy now until they drop me" or EVEN WORSE they think the other would be better off without them and pushes them away. so yeah the fact i can see one of these happening makes me sad.

If they aren’t a canon pairing, how would you get them together?     they give off "everyone knows we're dating but us" energy but at the same time i feel like they'd acknowledge there's something and just not define it bc a) they don't need to (misumi) or b) they're too nervous to (kazu). in other words i think one day they are holding hands and misumi says "kazu? is this dating?" and kazu holds his breath before asking "do you want it to be?"

If you had to take them and plunk them into another fandom, what fandom would that be? Why?     i think theyd be hilarious in any sports animanga (kazu is manager tho bc noodle arms but maybe they bond when misumi walks him through some of his usual training menu one night - ahem. anyway) BUT ALSO horimiya au...

How hard is it write/draw your pairing? Scale of 1-10.     AJDHAJDHSF I REALLY LOVE THEM SO IT COMES PRETTY EASILY... but sometimes you try to put them in tropes and realize they would Just Not Work Like That. idk where i'm going with this. but yeah. anyway 3 for sankaku.

Is there a pairing that you think rivals them?     in terms of what i ship, i tend to ship kazu and misumi individually with a lot of dif charas AJDHAKD. but in terms of like... in-universe "rival" pairings: kazu side: tsuzukazu (maybe, lbr it would take them 273924 yrs to actually get together), kazu x someone from winter (i... have my reasons but they'd take longer than what this answer entails) misumi side: ... surprisingly none that i can think of ahdjahd

Which character of the pairing do you like more? (Would you ever pair yourself with them?)     you know that tweet that's like "sometimes a ship is just your two favs"? yeah that's misukazu for me. but if i had to choose... misumi AJDHAJHDSF I HONESTLY WASNT THAT INTO YUME UNTIL THESE TWO CAME AROUND (NOT COUNTING 707)... but yeah if they wanted to hold me in their arms i wouldn't oppose

Which character of your pairing would be the one to break up with the other? Why?     OOOOOH BOY well. i think it could be either of them. i don't think they'd break up for lack of love but too much love and wanting the other to be happy and thinking that the only way to give them that is to let them go. so i guess the question is which of them would be more likely to be selfish and hold on. thinking this way, i think misumi would be more likely to break-up, bc kazu has lots of friends who are better than him!! and misumi is more ready to leave if he thinks he needs to than kazu is. now im sad.

Are they relatable as characters or as a pairing?     THE NUMBER OF TIMES I'VE BEEN CALLED KAZU KIN... in all seriousness kazu's struggles with speaking out and (shinobi spoilers) his uncertainty over his future hit real close to home... while i don't relate as much as misumi, his struggles always manage to tear my heart into pieces... ((oversharing alert) i guess what really separates me from misumi is his struggle with his desire to connect with family who has treated him poorly... whereas im more "lol fuck you") tldr i relate to kazu slightly more LOL

Did you once/ever dislike one/both of them?     i never disliked them but i was NOT expecting either of them to shoot up so quickly into my favs list ahdjahdjf. also i started shipping them Immediately After reading summer main story so there's that

On an estimate, how many posts have you made about them?    as of september 28th 2020 i make up 11/78 fics on ao3 in the romantic misukazu tag and 2/12 in the platonic one. i may have brainrot.

What made you decide to ship them?     TBH I FINISHED THE MAIN STORY AND WENT "OH MY GOD... THAT'S MY SHIP" but now that i'm here i continue to ship them because they have the potential to bring out both the best and the worst in each other and i'm all about that

Favorite genre for them? (Angst, fluff, etc.)     angst. i just. angst hurt/comfort all the way. im so sorry babies.

lol you thought there would just be 21 ANYWAY EXTRA 1: how do they spend breaks/vacation?    they'd travel a lot when they're older!! kazunari loves to travel and misumi would follow kazunari anywhere (also, new triangles!!) so they go somewhere new whenever they have the time. however i think eventually one or both of their future careers will take them anywhere and everywhere anyway, so their "ideal vacation" might turn into an evening in, cuddling and catching up (as if they didn't already send play-by-play updates over the phone of whatever they did during the day)

EXTRA 2: first date?     i don't they ever have an explicit first date, but if asked they'll cite the time they had a picnic in the park turned triangle hunt turned accidental dip in the duck pond. at least, kazunari will. misumi just tilts his head and wonders what you mean.

EXTRA 3: gifts?     IM FEELING REALLY CHEESY SO I'M MAKING THIS ABOUT ANNIVERSARY GIFTS they both end up getting each other jewelry (although kazu was really really nervous bc he wasn't sure if misumi would wear it). kazu gets misumi a bracelet (with triangles, of course although misumi only wears it sometimes because he doesn't want to lose it) and misumi gets kazu a pair of triangle earrings "so we can match!" and kazunari combusts at the implications

EXTRA 4: sharing clothes     THEY'RE ACTUALLY AROUND THE SAME SIZE (and tend to wear baggier stuff barring kazu's skinny jeans)... but they have completely different Styles so it's still really obvious when steal each other's stuff ahdjajdkaf. as cute as kazu would look in sumi's sweatshirt i think the much more likely scenario is kazu wrapping misumi in his jackets because this boy nEVER BRINGS HIS ANYWHERE anyway just. accidental shared wardrobe misukazu.

EXTRA 5: lake house au    consider: kazunari living in a house on the shore of a lake for a summer for Art Purposes (and a little bit for Dealing With Life purposes but he's not gonna admit that) and meets his lake neighbor misumi who kazu thinks might be a ghost or spirit for a while but he actually just lives further down the lake and misumi unknowingly helps kazu with his Life Issues and maybe they fall in love

I just finished The Outer Worlds

I don’t really ever use this blog for more than reblogging stuff, so this is probably coming out of left field for anyone who follows me, but as you see in the title, I beat The Outer Worlds not a couple of minutes ago. I have some thoughts I’d like to talk about while their fresh, and this is as good a place as any to do that lol

So, what did I think of it? Overall, I think The Outer Worlds is okay game that ultimately fails to meet up in many regards to not only Obsidian’s golden child, Fallout New Vegas, but in some departments even regular ass Bethesda games from years ago. And that’s honestly such a shame, because TOW had so much goddamn potential and yet I finished it and felt practically nothing for the entire last level and final ending sequence.

The main issue I think is that ultimately speaking, TOW doesn’t necessarily do anything different from any other RPG I can think of, and it doesn’t do anything like that super well. 

For example, the combat’s good on a technical level. The controls and mechanics are fun to use (especially the dodge system), but the enemies tend to either range from “complete curb stomp bitch babies” to “bullet sponge that’ll kill me so fast I won’t even know what happened.” Most fights weren’t particularly engaging, and I was basically handicapping myself but not using the companion abilities for about 75% of the game (I don’t know why I never tried pressing the d-pad buttons, but yet again, when I can just shoot shit and huff an inhaler, I didn’t need to think too hard). The disparity of how difficult the game can be is often confusing, and I was more often limited because of my ammo count more so than my ability to play the game.

The RP aspects can be good at times. There are plenty of skill checks that reward you for being a smart little egg, and a part of RPG’s I like is being able to avoid combat and make people happy, and generally make myself useful, so that was fairly fun. Overall the dialogue options and the performances by most VA’s left me not feeling like I was being hindered in acting and responding to situations how I’d like, so at the very least, that didn’t let me down.

The music was overall enjoyable, although very forgettable, and sometimes a bit all over the place: there’s Western-y guitar ambient tracks, also some more techno-y ones? Elevator music that sounds like they got it from a royalty free website. This kinda wish-washyness ties into multiple issues I had with the game I’ll get into further on.

The graphics are good, which isn’t necessarily shocking anymore because every game looks good. There are some aesthetic choices I liked, that being things like the Art Deco style architecture and advertisements from the loading screens. Terra 2 is gorgeous as all hell, with the skybox being particularly amazing (I’ve often fantasized about Earth having rings, so this partially fulfills that fantasy). Monarch is overall also very well done, with making it look and feel like a hostile shithole with ravenous wildlife. The looming gas giant overheard also does a good job of making me feel dread, which is about as much of that feeling I ever got. However, the game never really maintains a distinct “style”, rather it collages a bunch of them at once. Because for all the aesthetic of the Art Deco style that they do for cities like Byzantium. there’s like 10 levels/areas that are just generic as all hell “sci-fi space shit” that you’ve seen before. And then there’s Scylla, which is so fucking boring in design I don’t know why it’s even in the game.

This creates an issue where it’s like they wanted to make the game look Bioshock, but some people wanted something out of Mass Effect. But some people played Borderlands, and wanted to go for the wacky space bandit and hostile environment feel. But they also wanted to stick it to Bethesda, so they made is vaguely look like a Fallout game as well. It’s hard to describe in text, so I’m just gonna post these and show it best I can

^ It looks like space Bioshock here

^ And here it reminds me more of Borderlands than anything else (it’s a lot easier to see if you look at it from the ground, rip)

Scylla is literally just a rock. As far as I can tell, you could probably fucking avoid the damn thing if you avoid side quests. There’s fucking nothing there. Just enemies, a few side quest things, an empty town and a giant terraformer thingy that’s interesting to look at for like 4 seconds. And despite what you’d think, no, there is no low gravity. That would’ve at least made this place have some interesting gimmick or mechanic, but no. It’s just a fucking dumping ground for side quests. God. Fucking. Damnit.

All science-y buildings just look like this for the most part across all levels. It’s not bad, just very generic and same-y.

The Groundbreaker’s fairly interesting, until you realize that all it is is essentially a giant corridor front to back. Actually, scratch that, it’s two corridors! One of which is this Back Bays area overrun with criminals. How do you get to this clearly dangerous and isolated part of the ship? Well a fucking elevator smack dab in the middle of the pavilion of course! So anyone can just go up or down into this apparent no man’s land part of the ship by literally going into it via an elevator. Dear god.

^Monarch definitely has one of the best looking environments in the game, tied with Terra 2 down below

But what absolutely fucks the game overall is despite how much effort they put into making everything look nice (regardless if you actually like it or not), the overall level design in terms of function and whatnot? Mind numbingly boring.

All levels are really small maps with (at most) a handful of major buildings or towns depending on the scale, and the rest is just a bunch of abandoned buildings with some enemies, or a crashed ship or something. There's just...nothing going on with half of these dungeons.

Also the vast majority of buildings have a “Quarantine” sign out front or is locked in some capacity, which means you could have 4-5 buildings in a random batch of them along a road, but only 2 you can explore. And since all the fucking interiors across multiple planets look the exact same, it leads to an incredible feeling of sameiness in a game that has you running around an entire solar system. How the fuck even??? I’d argue fucking Fallout 3 handled this better. At least there was more to do! More overall dungeons and levels! Did I miss something? Am I just fucking stupid and I missed the all the good shit?

Combine this with the wish-washy aesthetics and music, it leads to an incredible feeling of not really knowing what to make of things. You’ll just be sprinting around, shooting all the red things on the compass just to get it over with by Monarch. And when you realize that LMG’s are just...the best weapons in the game as far as I could tell, and there’s no real downsize to them, you’ll just fucking run around gunning everything down while some forgettable track plays in the background until some enemy with a weirdly large health bar forces you to think for a bit before you get back to running around and shooting shit again. 

Despite this though? I still overall enjoyed the combat. I liked running around and becoming the 4th Horseman. Plus with the mechanics overall being fun to use, it wasn’t really that bad. But I can’t say on an objective level I think it’s good for a game to feel like that. Because despite how heavy handed I’m being right now (and will be throughout the rest of this impromptu review), I don’t hate this game. 

Sound design is overall very good. Guns make satisfying shooty shooty bang bang noises, and as I said before, the VA’s are overall very good all around. Parvati stands out as the most interesting character to listen to in general. She has a lot of informal speech patterns that makes her distinct, and is generally a treat to listen talk. At worst, you get a character like Nyoka, who doesn’t sound bad by any real means, but for a lot of her dialogue, I felt they should’ve slowed it down and focused on getting her emotions down. But it certainly wasn’t bad.

Storywise? This game wasn’t particularly interesting. I’m gonna put the keep reading thing here because I want to avoid spoilers for anyone who hasn’t played yet and cares about them. Long story short, I think the game was good, but very disappointing given what it could have been. I enjoyed myself for the most part, but often found the lack of anything super special to really hold it back from achieving something I think the gaming industry needed in an era of, ironically enough, hyper greedy corporations with no morals to speak of.

So, what did I think of the story? And I guess by extension, the side quests. Overall, I think the main story was...not very good. There was a lot of good stuff inbetween though, and a lot of side quests and little things definitely were enjoyable. But the plot is just not nearly as engaging as it should be. Given how short it was though, that might’ve been a mercy.

The story, as roughly as I can summarize is, is that you’re a colonist frozen on the colony ship “Hope.” It’s been adrift for 70 years, but you’re woken up by a guy named Phineas Welles (he’s basically Doc Brown, but nicer). The Board (which consists of the 10 companies who own and run the colony/solar system) try to stop him, but they fail, and you’re escape podded onto Terra 2, near a dying town called Edgewater. The pod accidentally kills the contact you were to meet, so now you’re gonna steal his ship and use it to do shit basically.

Along the way, you pick up a ragtag band of miscreants and general shitheads and kill a lot of people and wildlife in a quest to stop the corrupt Board from running the colony harder into the dirt than they already have. It’s very by the numbers, more or less. I guess.

The immediate issue is that, despite being able to join the Board and betray Phineas if you want, there’s absolutely no fucking reason to do that. Not a single goddamn reason, other than for the evulz. This creates an issue where I feel no reason to deviate from the Phineas side of the story. And I know what someone might be thinking “But Pixel! The Board is supposed to be evil!” And I am absolutely aware of that. But the thing is, so was Caesar’s Legion in Fallout New Vegas. And yet, that faction is often considered just as interesting and compelling a faction for the game as the NCR or Mr. House. People will, to this day, still argue over who had the best idea for solving the Wasteland’s issues. Because despite how evil the Legion is, they still had very valid points about the NCR and how horribly corrupt and bloated it was. And there was absolutely an argument to be made about how safe they made their lands for those under their ownership. Stuff like that that makes you actually consider and think about whether or not you're actually making the right choices for the whole of the New Vegas wasteland, and by extension the rest of the Western part of America.

Here? There’s no contest. There is no necessary evils. There is no good reason the Board does anything. No logic, no reason. All they can do is fuck shit up even more, and that makes them such a boring, vague antagonist that there was never a moment in my mind I actually considered working for them. Any potential moments they had to sway me or dashed aside by them constantly proving how they could never actually fix the problems they made. And if that was the intention? Then Obsidian fucked up.

People remember the villains that raise a point a hell of a lot more than they do villains that are just evil for the sake of it (there are obviously exceptions, for an RPG? you need a compelling villain). And that’s why no one will remember this game in a decade. It pales so hard in comparison to New Vegas, it’s not even funny. It’s on par with Fallout 3, at best. Which wouldn’t be a bad thing if the whole point of this game was to make a statement against an increasingly morally bankrupt Bethesda.

Let’s look at, per se, Skyrim. Paarthurnax was a supporting character with an interesting backstory: he’s Alduin’s brother, who is the main antagonist. He is a dragon that secludes himself on the top of the tallest mountain in Skyrim, who meditates and focuses on suppressing his inherit evil dragon nature. Despite this nature, he chooses to be good. And he asks a very compelling question.

"What is better? To be born good or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?”

In a single sentence, Skyrim asked a more though provoking question than the entirely of The Outer Worlds. And if you played F:NV, then it’s probably weird to hear that, because F:NV was full of moral and philosophical quandaries. So where did it all go?

The thing is, people forget that the Obsidian that made F:NV is dead and gone. The actual people who made that game have all moved on from that company. This is the child trying to replicate the success of it’s parents, without entirely understanding exactly what the parent did to achieve what it achieved.

The biggest difference between F:NV and TOW is that F:NV really forces you to think. TOW just doesn’t require that, at all. 

Phineas good, Board bad. No thinking required.

I think the real warning sign is at the beginning of the game as well. Edgewater, the first town in the game, is dying. People are leaving and the town's also dealing with a disease epidemic. The town’s leader’s answer? Cut off power to the deserters, and force them to work harder despite the fact the town’s basically dying because of the overworking and disease. Despite the fact there’s not even enough medicine to heal everyone, and they have to play favorites with who lives and who dies.

What the fuck logic is this? Why would I ever choose that?

The only other choice, unless I missed a compromise solution (which I would’ve wanted) is to route power to the deserters and finish off the town more or less. The deserters wouldn’t take in everyone though, so a lot of people would die anyways. But even then, she’s still clearly the more competent leader. There’s not a goddamn contest. 

It just continues like that the whole game. I rarely had to think about who I’d side with. because the solution is obvious. The literal only reason I’d side with the corporations is if I was being evil, nothing else.

The best the story gets is when you need to make a compromise on Monarch between MSI (a corporation who got the boot from the Board) and the Iconoclasts (Religious people who are anti corporation). If you work with the second in command of the Iconoclasts, you can depose their extremist, dipshit leader and work out a truce. Which is good! It rewards the player for this too, when these factions come to help in the final level of the game (and when you see specific characters you could save helping out, that also make it feel like your decisions had an impact). You see the two factions...standing next to eachother, which isn’t much, but it’s about as much change you see in the game.

Which is also another thing that TOW fails to accomplish: a sense of longevity with my decisions leads to me feeling that, despite making the right choices, nothing really changes. 

Going back to Edgewater, you’d think after a while, I’d come back and the town would be entirely gone or something, right? 

Nope.

Some NPC’s stood outside the factory forever, as did some guards. There weren’t any lights on. That’s about it.

Well, certainly the Deserters must give me more quests to help out, which can lead to me establishing them and helping them help the Edgewaterers, right?

No. Very quickly you realize there’s very little do or talk about with NPC’s after you do monumental decisions. The only functional difference is an opinion slider, which is another imitation from F:NV that means fuck all. The only in game things it affects is: a) The prices of venders of that factions

b) Whether or not that faction will shoot you on site.

That’s it as far as I noticed. The best idea they had, that being that factions can love you, but also fear you just doesn’t do anything. As far as I could tell, at least.

I’d love to be wrong, because I was so excited to see what would happen to entire settlements and after I helped them. After I made important decisions that’d change the face of the colony. And I felt so disappointing when it became apparent little actually mattered. 

The companion sidequests aren’t too much better. The pacing is so weird, sometimes, depending on how available certain planets are. Parvati’s was especially jarring, despite it being the best written by far.

It basically is you helping her get with an engineer chick from the Groundbreaker. It’s pretty adorable overall, and without a doubt has some of the better writing character wise, but the pacing was so fucking weird. It initially starts with you getting Parvati to talk to her about engineering stuff. They say they’ll email and stuff about engineering stuff. which is neat. So I run around, finish up all the side quests on the ship as I can, then head back to my own ship. I did not go back to my ship at all during this. 

When I come back, Parvati immediately tells me that she and the engineer, Junlei, have been messaging and getting flirty and now she has a crush and it’s just like “Dude, were you texting her while we murdered all those bugs in the engine?”

It’s doubly funny as well, because Obsidian wanted to avoid the player having romanceable characters. Which makes about as much sense as you think. Once source said the reason was that they wanted you to focus on roleplay, and not trying to bang anyone you found hot (okay?). Another just said they weren’t ready for it. And I believe it. As much as I think romance would’ve been another good thing to add depth to this game, I bet you they’d have fucked it up. It’s just funny. Even Fallout 4 had pretty acceptable romances.

Granted the system was fucking basically “Kill shit together until you wanna bang” but fuck, it was something! It also doesn’t help there’s a bunch of cuties all over this game: Huxley stands out as an adorable muffin who becomes a generic NPC at the end of the MSI/Iconoclast questline, despite the fact you can even repair her journal terminal with zero indication at you can do it, which is good! Let me just do things to be nice! But she literally just sits there after you rescue her with a few dialogue options which goes away after the peace deal, and it's so fucking frustrating that I want to enjoy the characters more, but none of them seem to have more than a paragraph's worth of depth to them and it's so sad.

Even the companions are like this. At the beginning I’d try and talk with Parvati about anything, but the only dialogue options would be about getting her out of the party, and that’s it. I can’t ask her what she thinks of things, or of the current quest/situation. There’s such a weird lack of depth in a weird amount of areas, that it felt almost worse than playing a Bethesda game.

I think the penultimate disappointment of the game is, fittingly, the final level, Tartarus. Which is fitting, because it feels very hellish. Not the planet mind you, or the prison which it takes place in, but just the complete lack of anything super special. It’s just the same kind of environments you’ve already run through, but bigger and with more bullet sponge bad guys. Which is funny, because jumping around and killing an army on a purple hell planet that has perpetual lightning storms would’ve been sick as fuck, but nah, gotta run around on Scylla instead of anywhere else compelling.

In my playthrough, MSI, the Groundbreaker, and the Iconoclasts came to help me deal with all the fucking goons, which was mostly cool because I didn’t have to deal with the tediousness of killing every last one of corporate goon myself.

This is about as big of an impact your decisions come to as far as I’ve noticed. Which isn’t saying much.

You meet the Chairman of the Board here, by the way. I just shot him and kept moving. shrugs

There’s also a last minute villain in this Sophia person, who is also apparently on the Board? It’d help if there was a list of the Board people, which could’ve been on a terminal somewhere. Maybe I’m dumb and never found it, which is plausible. 

The final boss fight, (I hesitate to call it that) is just somewhat large robot. It’s a bullet sponge with respawning combat drones flying everywhere and they’re very annoying. I died once after around 10 minutes of fighting, then using Parvati and Felix’s (he’s another companion, he’s also okay I guess) combat abilities I knocked it down and layed into the robot’s weak spot. He died very quickly.

So depending on how you do it, the final fucking boss is either stupidly hard or mind numbingly easy. I don’t know which is worse.

So you go past the dead robot, gun down Sophia in one shot, and save Phineas. You basically become the leader of Halcyon, there’s a F:NV-esque slideshow and commentary about your actions that somehow is worse that New Vegas’s, credits roll, and you sit there thinking “That’s it? That’s really it?”

Yeah, that’s it. 

It’s such a let down, especially because this was supposed to be Fallout New Vegas’s spiritual successor. But all it does it make me want to play that game instead of this one.Which is probably what you should do regardless if you pick this game up or not.

There’s a bunch of other mechanics and stuff I never brought up. There’s technically a character customization screen, but you literally only see your character in the select menu, and there’s no third person. There’s a barber in Edgewater who’s also a doctor, and yet you can’t even get a haircut from him (again, failing to match up to even Fallout 3). 

There’s these Mods you can put on armor and guns, and you find them by the bucket full so you’ll always have those. Just get an aim stabilizing one for an LMG and you’ll be fine. You can also tinker your armor and weapons, making them stronger if you spend credits on it (why not the armor and weapon parts, I’ll never fucking know). You can repair your stuff at a workbench, which is advisable. Just take all the weapons and armor you pick up, take it apart for parts, and never worry about it again. You’ll get money from quests, so buying those parts is meaningless and a waste of money

There’s also hacking and stealth and stuff. Stealth is such a non...thing in the game. There’s no silencers, but since all enemies decided to put cotton into their ears, there’ll be plenty of times I shoot someone, and a guy ten feet away heard fucking nothing. Plus there’s this disguise mechanic where you pick up ID guards and get a hologram disguise that wears out as you walk (passing speech check from suspicious guards restores it), so it’s not like sneaking around was ever a priority. Just put your points into the speech. Stealth is a dump stat more or less. 

Oh yeah, Parvati’s an ace lesbian. Which is nice that they handled that way in a non-dipshit way (you can also identify as ace in certain dialogue with her in her companion questline, which is funny considering they never let you fuck anyways, so it’s weird that you even have the choice). My only complaint is that they should’ve put this representation in a better game. 

What’s funny is that, despite everything, I don’t even hate this game. I feel a remarkable numbness, followed by a desire for something better. I spent about a week burning through it? If I had more free time, I could’ve finished it sooner probably. I can’t say I didn’t enjoy it. It was pretty fun for what it was, but knowing that this is somehow supposed to match up to what F:NV was is sad, and a sign of how bad the gaming industry had fallen. 

The only difference here is that unlike the Outer Worlds, I can’t purge the rot of the gaming industry with a haelstrom of plasma bullets.

Would I recommend this game? I guess. There’s still some fun to be had, but don’t expect anything too major or interesting. Get it on sale, it;s not worth $60 right now. There’s apparently DLC coming out for it eventually? I might play it, and I might post an update to this review, or make a seperate post for that eventually. Depends on how well this one does? Or if the DLC makes me feel enough emotion to type something out like this in 2 straight hours.

Iruma-kun 8 - 9 | BnHA 68 - 71 | NGL 8 - 9 | ID: Invaded Sneak Preview (i.e. eps 1 - 2)

Tw: suicide for ID: Invaded, by the way (it’s only briefly in the commentary, but it’s in ep 2). Plus, ID: Invaded gets its hashtag well before its debut.

Iruma-kun 8

“Lady Redhair”? I think Amelie’s hair is orange, but you do you, Clara.

I paused at the wrong time and saw Asmodeus had bug eyes behind his glasses.

Is that the vending machine Clara attacked her bullies with…?

I wonder what rank Amelie is…

Diabolical + botany = diabotany.

Come to think of it, the Azz-Azz/Iruma relationship is similar to the Gokudera/Tsuna relationship…

So as it turns out, Clara gets her juvenile tendencies from taking care of her younger siblings. Hmm…

Aw, it’s kinda disheartening to see Clara so down. It looks a lot like Zenitsu when he doesn’t see his own abilities, or something of the sort (which I always fall hook, lin and sinker for).

I wonder what Amelie’s seduction percentage is…?

Oh, you can see Succubus-sensei in the ED…hmm.

Update: where is Clara’s dad…? *gulps if he’s passed away*

Iruma-kun 9

Azz-kun is such a proud parent…even though he’s the same age as Iruma, LOL.

Lack of ambition? Clara just proved this wrong last episode and Sabro has his own ambitions…but then again, Azz-kun wasn’t privy to such knowledge.

“Fear 1” is a pun on ikkai (first floor). (At least, that’s what I can assume from context.)

There doesn’t actually seem to be a pun when Azz mentions Execution Cannonball (shokei gyokuhou)…which, I think, is weirder than having a pun in the first place. (The later joke is that Clara says gyouki instead of gyokuhou, which is pretty far off for part of it but completely spot on for the other , so the subbers put in a phrase that matched that kind of pattern in the English as well.)

Rumour has it there’s going to be an Iruma-kun dub. I wonder how they’ll make all the puns work…?

It’s-wahahaha! It’s just dodgeball!

Huh? A high-ranking demon? Sullivan? Opera?????

LOL, you can still see the tree sprouting from one of the rooms.

The Demonitor is handing Opera the dodgeballs, LOL!

I like Opera’s nails…they’re a nice shade of purple…

Ponytail Iruma…looks a bit strange, but I’ll get used to it. I like ponytails, y’know.

Even Azz-kun’s hands are big in comparison to Iruma…

That preview was far too abrupt!

BnHA 68

The giant moving crab is actually a thing. I went and saw it one time in Ginza and again on Dotonbori, Osaka. The crab is associated with Kani Doraku, a crab restaurant.

“Amajiki” literally means something like “eats the sky”. A good name for my good boi.

The subbers didn’t even finish the word “defence”! Eesh!

Amajiki likes butterflies…? I wonder, if he ate butter, could he be a butterfly too…?

Running All Might, I see…(it’s a parody of the Glico Running Man in Osaka.)

Basically, this is what Vigilantes was for! Woot!

I love how Kaminari charges people’s phones. That’s the sort of dumb thing heroes do with their powers, since you gotta remember they’re just young dumb boys at heart as well.

The problem with a hardening power is that it sounds lewd out of context…

I wonder what Fat Gum’s first job was…?

There’s a post-credits segment…keep watching.

BnHA 69

Centipeder has such a cute voice, albeit a distorted one.

Kirishima is voiced by Masuda, so it’s fun to hear him get such a prominent role again (after Charanko in OPM s2, Touken Ranbu and Boueibu, among other roles).

“Likes: All Might” – LOL, we knew that already though.

Nighteye is Seiya Ryuuguuin: Hero Version.

There’s a post-credits segment. Keep watching.

The manga calls the magical girl series “Preyure”, so it’s weird to suddenly have the dub refer to its dub name, “Glitter Force”.

BnHA 70

Midoriya doesn’t have any bedhead…because his hair’s already messy! LOL.

“…what’s important is what you do afterwards.”

“Maybe we can catch the League…and the Hassaikai all at once!” – Yeah…that’s not going to happen Kirishima, considering the series is still going.

Come to think of it, Eraser’s goggles are the only part of his outfit that don’t really match…no wonder the idea comes from somone else (maybe saying that is a spoiler for those only following the main series and not Vigilantes, though…?).

Swordfish will become important later on…you know Tamaki’s Quirk, so you’ll see when it’s important soon.

Another post-credits segment…keep watching.

BnHA 71

One of the reasons I like Amajiki is because of his intro. Now you can see why!

Hassaikai = Hassai Group, so calling the opponents the “Shie Hassaikai” and “Hassai Group” in the same translaton is inconsistent.

“…playing into their hands.” – You can’t say that when you don’t have hands, Tamaki…

No Guns Life 8

Well, there ain’t no metaphor like the blatant one – man is the deadliest weapon to himself…or something of the sort.

Geesh! I wanna dub for this!

Well…couldn’t Olivier light the cig and stick it in Juzo’s mouth…? Or is that not “sexy enough” for the target audience?

No Guns Life 9

I’ve noticed only the women have lip flaps now…LOL. (But maybe I’m stating the obvious because my head’s a bit fuzzy from lack of sleep…)

“Medico” appears to be the Spanish word for “doctor” (as you might be able to guess). Then again, what Spanish colonies are there in the world…? Spain, sure, and South America…*googles* Basically all of South America, dangit.

Context says “madre” = mother.

Context also says “mentira” = lie, or “you’re lying!”.

Geesh, that cup size joke was such a non-sequitur that I didn’t even find it funny…

Geesh! This Colt dude is basically Sabro (from Iruma-kun)! Update: He also looks like he came straight outta JJBA.

ID: Invaded 1 – 2 (SNEAK PREVIEW!) 

I thought I wouldn’t be able to access the preview, but by accessing Funimation’s videos…I can watch it!

Ohmygloooooooob, this “I’m in pieces, but I’m connected” concept is so cool! (But also hella freaky, which is exactly my style!...You do know that I’m a bit of a freak for body horror, right?)

You…probably shouldn’t be yelling at the person if they appear to be dead(!)  

This would make an awesome escape game, no…?

I never knew the future looked so similar to the present.

Ooh, this gets more and more interesting! There are people watching this murder mystery.

Whose ID Well is this…? If it’s Sakaido’s, then maybe he can find out more about himself through the celebs.

The code appears to be from the Windows operting system, since C: is the default hard drive. So I’d say it might be Windows Visual Basic, actually, or C (the programming language).

Hmm…maybe that’s when the episode ws being produced.

Okay, so how I’m understanding this is that Sakaido is in the world of the murderer (of Kaeru’s) mind and he has to find her murderer to get out.

Ooh, so Sakaido is also a murderer…and as it turns out, Sakaido’s perp drills holes in the heads of their victims…scary. What I was really here to say was that this reminds me of a movie called Minority Report.

I think one of the victims had part of his head missing in the ID Well, so maybe Sakaido’s missing an elbow in real life…?

The joke is that the word for “well” in Japanese is i (井) or ido (井戸) and then ID, of course, is ID and likewise id is id (but it’s ido in Japanese). Googling ID: Invaded reveals Sakaido is written with this same kanji, plus two others (酒井戸), meaning his name is part of the wordplay too.

It’s like Minecraft, except you make the world with your entire body…LOL.

Maybe that’s (takoya) short for “takoyaki”…? Just a guess. Update: I’m right.

The licence plates say “Shinagawa”. This show takes place in Shinagawa (or the car I read the plate of was obtained in Shinagawa)!

Huh? How did Hondomachi get into the well? Do they have a drive to kill as well????

These quotes have gotta mean something, so here’s the first one: “Is it ridiculous to believe that I have been given a certain role to play for this present world?”

What’s up with the numbers in the room Matsuoka is in…? (Apparently a terrible day volunteering is enough to put me on edge and subsequently make me a master detective, it seems.)

I went back to my old Honeyfeed stories recently and I rediscovered a character that I wrote about a few years ago – Yuki, after the matching character I axed from my original plot of Half-Paid Heroes (because the story I’m referring to is the Honeyfeed version of HPH) – who was partially close-shaven like Fukuda. I gave Yuki such a character design just to set up intrigue, but I didn’t think I’d ever see a similar design to it, ever. Now, here I am.

Narihisago? What a name! I checked what “hisago” means and apparently it means “gourd”.

Is this Kaeru (the one that committed suicide), perhaps, the one in Hondomachi’s head and that’s not actually the case…?

The CGI’s a bit awkward in this show.

Is “Muku” Sakaido/Narihisago’s daughter…?

I think the old guy – the head of the cop team – uses a Mac, based on his GUI.

New quote: “Wind comes in this hole and out the other, and it makes the world a little bit clearer.” This reveals the quotes are actually from the episode.

This music which acts as the ED is nice. I’m basically sold on this show, y’know.

The original work is by “The Detectives United”. I wonder what that means…?

You recently reblogged something from an aro who likes Crazy Ex GF, can you recommend other shows/movies/etc that have aro/ace visibility? Thanksthanksthanks

Hi there! Sorry this has taken so long. ^^;;

I just want to make a clarification here that there’s a difference between aro/ace visibility and aro/ace friendliness. Aro/ace visibility would include some form of aro/ace rep, while aro/ace friendliness would be stories that aren’t super focused on romance/sex (or at least in the normal way we expect) that aro/ace people may be more comfortable watching or just relate to on some personal level as a result.

That being said, I want to clarify that Crazy Ex-Girlfriend has a lot of romance and sex in it! I absolutely adore the show, and it absolutely does play with and flip common romantic tropes, but there’s no aro/ace rep or really visibility in it. But to get to the end of flipping the amatonormative script, our protag spends the vast majority of the show chasing a relationship. So for any who saw that post, do know there’s a lot of romance and sex in CEG, even though it does play with common tropes!

That aside...

A new blog @aro-test has popped up to go over if media has a romantic subplot or not, so it’s definitely a blog of interest! I also suggest @representativecharacters, which has a great tagging system you can use to look for a variety of rep. I’ve also got a variety of tags I try to keep up on: representation, book recs, and comic recs so far. As for things I could think of off the top of my head, trying to hit rep/friendliness in a variety of ways (in the order I thought of them; there’s only explicit rep if I mention it):

Shows

BoJack Horseman - to be honest, I still haven’t tried one, but it does have an explicitly asexual character.

Shadowhunters - another show with a canon ace character I haven’t gotten to watch (but really want to).

Steven Universe - okay, this is a children’s show and it’s definitely not everyone’s cup of tea (I didn’t really even notice the inconsistent art style until people pointed it out), but I’m suggesting it because: a) there is an overreaching plot that runs the course of the show; it’s not just disconnected segments like something like Spongebob may be, b) there’s a lot of episodes to go through, and c) there really is not a lot of romance in it (and as a kid’s show, there also isn’t anything really sexual - I don’t even remember catching any subtle innuendo like a lot of kid’s movies these days have). There are a couple characters in relationships or who are kind of flirty/pining, but it’s mostly background and subtle, and the main plot is more about finding and having confidence in who you are. I’m also suggesting this one because unlike some other kids shows I could cover, the characters here are either human or very human-like. I don’t know about others, but I personally don’t feel very represented by, say, cartoon horses. ^^;;

Sex Education - There’s some debate on this one, but I personally really enjoyed the first season and am going to remain optimistic for any future seasons. There is sex and romance in this show, but the main character isn’t interested in a sexual relationship and is also repulsed by masturbation. The controversy comes in because the potential ace character’s actions are thought by others to be a result of some form of sexual trauma when he was younger (likely coming from living with his sex therapist mother who is not so subtle with the men she sleeps with). However, he’s really the first character who really seems to put my high school experiences on TV, so I think the show is worth it.

Avatar the Last Airbender - okay, another kid’s show, but a great kids show. There is some romance in this, but it’s definitely not the focus, and if you just look away fast enough at the last 30 seconds of the last episode, you can pretend the romantic subplot that never really existed also never got started. =p But seriously, great show that focuses more on friendship and empathy justice more than anything else.

Jessica Jones - unfortunately, the show is really going downhill as the seasons progress IMO, but I’ve easily read Jessica as similar to myself: caedromantic. There’s sex and there is minor romance between other characters, but Jessica herself seems more focused on herself and her semi-superhero-status than anything else.

Black Summer - I’m still very pissed off that (spoiler: they killed off the deaf character of color), but the first season of the show was very much focused on the drama and horror and survival of the beginning of the zombie outbreak, so it was aro/ace friendly.

Pose - there is some hints/lead ins to sex and some characters in romantic relationships, but by and large the focus is on queer poc and the world they have carved out for themselves. I would say the main relationship type is found family, which I adore.

One Day At a Time - I’m honestly purely recommending this one for a moment in s3 (tad spoilery but I’ll keep names out of it) where two characters are thinking of having sex, one freaks out, and the other gives a really heartfelt speech on how it’s okay to take things slow and it would in fact be okay if they never had sex. It’s more of a family show, so there’s nothing very explicit. There is some romance. But s3 completely exceeded expectations with that scene, so I’m throwing the show up here as a rec.

Z-Nation - there’s some on and off romantic (and some sexy times, but I think these both get less and less as seasons go on) subplots, but again, the focus is on zombies. And honestly, I love a zombie take like in Z-Nation where there are still outlets where people come together and they don’t all just automatically kill each other on sight. >.>

Marvelous Mrs. Maisel - our protag is getting out of a marriage, so there are allusions/discussions to and about that, but in the first season (couldn’t watch the second as I moved and don’t have my own prime account) the focus was definitely on Mrs. Maisel finding herself and figuring out how to do things without a husband. And she doesn’t do this by trying to wrangle up a new husband. She does it by chasing a career she enjoys just for herself.

Good Girls - there is romance and IIRC some sex in this show, but by and large, the romantic relationships are kind of broken and falling apart, while the core group of friends must stick together and keep each other together.

Into the Badlands - awesome karate action show with bits and pieces of romantic subplots but largely action-focused.

The X-Files - so Scully and Mulder end up together-ish (I don’t think it really happened until the movies, but I don’t clearly remember), but I’m not alone in seeing Scully and Mulder as really more queerplatonic than anything else. Also the werelizard episode of the re-start is hilarious.

Movies

A Wrinkle in Time - I found this movie cathartic to watch. Really beautiful. Really sweet. Really pure. It was beautiful and the focus was absolutely on familial relationships. I really loved at the end of the movie when the parents got the kiss, not the two kids, who we got to see just being kids still.

Men in Black - I love the MIB series and am very much looking forward to Thompson’s and Hemsworth’s upcoming version. These movies I think are both aro and ace friendly and just super fun to watch.

How to Train Your Dragon - (I’d ask how kids shows/movies keep ending up on here, but I don’t need to ask, lol) while Hiccup and Astrid become a couple, they’re really not overtly romantic (and definitely not sexual) and the focus is on friendship and family and dragons.

Webcomics

Rock and Riot - haven’t started it yet, but I think the entire main cast or close to it is aspec in some way, and it looks really cute.

Mistlands - another one with a ton of queer rep including aspec characters that I haven’t started, but have followed here on tumblr, and really look forward to starting.

Girls With Slingshots - this one’s definitely pretty sexual and romantic, but there is an ace character introduced partially through, and I really enjoyed the run of this comic. It’s one of the few webcomics I actually started and kept up with over the years.

Books

Books I’m not going to get into here not only because of my book rec tag above but also because there are some queer rep blogs out there you can search asexual/ace or aromantic/aro on, and they’ve already done a much better job sharing these books than I ever could! Check out @ya-pride, @lgbtqreads, @harmonyinkpress, and the #books tag on @fuckyeahasexual.

Hope this is something like what you were looking for!

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Anyone feel free to make your own recs!

x

Episode 10 - "I've been channeling Raffy's chaos and messy style" ~Amy

Colin survived omg omg. I went on call with him after tribal council and I smoothed things over with us. So I'm like the only person he's not hating right now. Also I literally told Colin everything. I told him exactly what happened which is so awkward if anyone finds out I tolf him that they all backstabbed him. Also Elle cannot be trusted!! Why would she do this? She's probably working with Colin and at this point I'm ok with voting off Elle. She really backstabbed the entire plan. Also Elle's idol is gone so it would be easy. BUT, we need to rid of the advantages that remain. There's not any time to get off people I don't trust. We need to expose every last idol we can. Also I know Brayden has an idol and I'm working with him but I might have to backstab that guy because if he makes it to final tribal council with an idol that will be big on his resume. Honestly Brayden will be seen as the most popular social player so that will look really good compared to me. So I might have to backstab my best friend before the time runs out. 

Wtf was that tribal. Literally besides Colin, the only person left out of the vote and lied to by my own partner. Just when i thought things were looking up for me in this game, the rug gets pulled from underneath me again. I literally dont feel like i can trust any of them but for the sake of playing nice, I have to pretend that everything is fine and be a fake bitch for a day or two. Ugh 😑

I understand Colin is probably really upset and hurt because he felt personally close with me, but I don’t understand why my reasons for not saving him weren’t valid. When he tried to save Dennis, it rubbed HIMYM the wrong way and I didn’t want to betray 5 people for 1 person the same way he did that because it’s what gave everyone distrust. He said he didn’t tell anyone about HIMYM until after he heard his name, but that’s a lie as Josh and Jay both heard of it by round 8. I said that and then he said “well that’s still one person”. It’s more than one and even then, one person is one person. You gave us a reason to distrust you and that’s why you were targeted. I never told anyone about his SWP because I didn’t want to give him a reason to tell others I’m not trustworthy or for him to target me with. Ultimately, of course I knew Jay wasn’t going to send me out, but there was a real concern that Babs had an idol and that between me and Anastasia, I would go. So yeah, my concerns were indeed valid as it could’ve gone to a point where I go. I really want immunity this round. So bad. But if it’s not me I’ll be ok with my allies having it. But please I want immunity!!! 

[this was earlier, but put it wherever✨] Sooooo so much drama these days, I used to be in an alliance with Jay, Brayden, and Anastasia but they're all in a megasix alliance except Jay is relatively new bc they swapped him out for Colin recently, Jay is completely in Jodi's pocket and RIP honestly bc I was hope our little Corn Tribe (we're both from Ohio lol) would make it far, Colin and I are firmly allies now and we have an alliance with Amy (who is currently Colin's no. 1 ally and I respect that she risked it all for him lol understandable) and are goin to make another one with Josh. Josh and I are allies and I trust him a lot partially bc ppl lied to him almost as much as ppl lied to me and Colin and being at the bottom is a good way to know your allies are true, they have little to gain 😂 oh and Brayden and Anastasia and I are still "allies" and idk Jay hasn't talked to me yet sooooo let's see what happens there!

I accidentally said that Josh was on the bottom out loud when I was answering him for the question who doesnt deserve to be here. Omg I literally ruined our relationship. I am sooo stupid. I literally told him i was sorry and he said K. Ok but he is on the bottom. Obviously he doesn't need me as an ally and that whole side has a plan. Omg Im ready to be blindsided lol. But also maybe dont vote out me. Josh really isnt that forgiving is he? That is crazy to me. I wouldve pretended to forgive at least. Now I feel even more awful because he never said he forgave me. Pain. Anyways I screwed up and now I'm just praying Josh doesn't gun after me now. But I did tell Josh the whole truth and apologized genuinly about the situation. Oh god I hope he doesnt hate me. I dont even want him as a jury vote I just cant take anyone hating me or disliking me. It makes me want to throw up. But I deserve to feel this way since I emberassed him infront of everyone i am so so stupid. Anyways time to plan who to get out. OMG JOSH JUST TEXTWD ME "It's fine Im on the bottom. My feelings dont matter" WHAAATTT OF COURSE HIS FEELINGS MATTWR I CANT BELOEBE IHURT HIS ACTUAL FEELINFA I AM SO STUPID WTF I AM AWFUL I WILL GO APOLOGIZE MORW NOW GOODBYE

it appears either jodi or jared are going tonight, and although they’re my allies, i selfishly don’t care. I’ll still be in the game, so that’s nice i suppose. I love jodi, but she’s paranoid and it’s a whole deal trying to work with her, if she got voted out i could maybe get some sleep every once in awhile. I love her to death, but frankly whatever happens tonight as long as it ain’t me I don’t really care. Hell, even if it is me, then whatever lol, I can get caught up on sleep then. Frankly this is where the game gets ugly, and i’m cool with staying out of the drama. it still sucks that josh hates me though, i genuinely like him, and i feel like he doesn’t want to be my friend beyond the game anymore. To me, i’m going to keep doing me. I’m gonna chill, i’m gonna relax, and i’ll play when i feel like it. My mental health is important, so even if i’m not playing as hard as others, it’s just a game. If i lose, i will not lose any sleep over it. 

DAMN last tribal really killed the vibes in the game. no one wants to talk. everyone is scared of stuff getting leaked or turning on people. BUT ON THE FLIP side that means everyone is flipping on everyone SOMEHOW amy managed to escape unscathed. They have NO idea she's in with us and with them. She's telling us everything. it's actually insane to watch her do it. Truly international superspy behavior.   We have our numbers and they have theirs. They made another majority alliance except they replaced me with Jay. Whatever, expected. its fine. I truly did not talk much to people before the challenge, I just laid back and let Amy gather information for us. The immunity challenge was absolutely crazy good for us. Elle winning immunity is perfect, and the fact they GAVE AMY the other immunity is also amazing, a testament to how much they do trust her. THEN THIS IS WHERE THINGS STARTED GETTING EXCITING so I still have my handy chaos idol. I was thinking about numbers and I came to the realization that we could get Jodi cirie'd out this tribal. Their side is splitting votes on Josh and I, and there's four of us. If we vote the other 4 people in that alliance and then play the chaos idol, it leaves Jodi the only one without a vote and she's automatically out. It was a huge risk but I brought this plan to Josh, Amy, and Elle. because of the touchy subjects it made me truly feel that I could trust my allies right now. I was voted "Who is your closest ally" and I'm almost certain it was those three that put me down. That means I can trust them with this plan. (I hope). Elle, however, brought up the very good point that Jodi might be idoled, it's very obvious for us to go after her. SO we also decided that we should leave no votes on Brayden and then theres a revote between the two. SO TLDR THE PLAN RN: play chaos idol and coordinate votes so there's a revote between Jodi and Brayden. Also we're telling everyone else our plan is to vote Jared, that way it's not too obvious we have shit up our sleeve. there is the prospect of them splitting the vote 3-3 and then we don't even need to use the chaos idol, we just have the numbers. The other option is they put all 6 votes on one person and then we do have to play it. Thats why its so good we have Amy as our inside source telling us everything that's going on with them. so yeah right now we're still playing it by ear. not a lot of people are online and available to we're just waiting to get it all sorted out. Updates soon! uwu

Hahahahaha omfg so after we yeeted out of last tribal and then elle used their idol apparently anastasia and jodi changed their vote to Babs so they still went home and we kept Colin's idol. We jumped back on the tribe call and it was only host Jay and Raffy left lol like we were ready for a tribe fight! But I think it turned out better because I am still getting all the info in the group. Touchy subjects was interesting and almost exposed us bc colin and jodi tied for closest allies lol which I'm sure it was like 3-3-whatever. But she said I'm the group maybe it was like 2-2-1s. So that's a relief. However. Everyone is being really quiet with me and our brayden - jodi - me alliance is silent. I'm concerned they think it is me who's leaking but from what I can tell jodi (and thus anastasia, brayden,jay, and jared automatically) believe it was elle who leaked the plan to vote colin. So idk how but I'm in the clear. I'm just waiting to be found out bc I'd be an easy vote out. BUT I think they believe I'm still with new himym because brayden chose to give me immunity in touchy subjects!! And elle got first out!! So we are both safe and the current plan for Jodi's group is to tell Colin josh and elle they are splitting but they will put all votes on josh so that colin flushes his idol. Except lol it's a chaos idol. And if that's the case colin wants me to vote him ☠️ but it actually keeps him safe so I'll do it. I would just hate for the chaos idol to be fake. I think I know where all remaining advantages are except the idol I think Jared has lol. So for the break down brayden has an idol he believes is real but is fake and he is not telling anyone in the group or jodi or me so as much as I like brayden I can't wait to see him play it and it's fake. Then Colin has Dennis's chaos idol and one more regular idol. I have the merge idol and a steal a vote. That leaves only jared's idol that we might be able to flush this go if they actually believe jared is the target from Josh elle colin. But if they don't we can leave votes off jared and jodi and we can vote out the unplayed idol or vote jodi out and her minions have to regroup. My biggest concern has been josh bc he really seems to not like me ☠️ and here I am risking it all to keep colin, elle, and josh in the game lol. So now colin elle and I have a three. Colin filled them in and they trust me. And we waited until josh calmed down bc he was really mad that I cut his rope in the challenge. Unfortunately I knew that he wasn't winning bc he's at the bottom, none of them were giving him immunity, and I needed to keep up the facade that I was with them 100% so I was guessing like everyone else on the most allies even though I knew it would be colin lol. So now colin has talked to Josh and josh knows about the chaos idol so I just hope he's 100% with us. Because if we play this right it's 4-4. And then I'm gonna have to reveal to them I have a steal a vote lol they might be upset I didn't tell them before but I've never said I didn't have anything (except to jodi whoops). Also now jodi is thinking worst case like wants me to say I'll vote out anastasia if it's a revote and also at 6. I was like "oh I'm a revote? I got you" as in if vote you out sorry girl. Listen I know I'm not winning and I know I'm not getting to the end because it would be stupid to take me at this point. I'm literally a double agent secret spy lol. However the entire jury WILL despise me but all I could hope is they respect the moves I made. But it seems like a lot of people in this game take things very personal so I really think it would be a completely bitter jury against me not that I'm getting there. I kind of don't want to use my steal a vote at 8 and hope they still think I'm with new himym because then we could simply idol where their vote is and I keep steal a vote for 6 and my idol for 5 and I'm golden lol 😂. And here I was gonna hard quit the game lol. I mean tbh they could just vote me here... Wait lol I'm immune jk thanks. Literally i think Babs is indifferent and dennis did like me but his vote would still go to colin. But if I was in f3 IMAGINE the story of have to tell lol and convince them all. It's the struggle of playing more behind the scenes but I really think someone is going to leave the info. I hope josh stays quiet until 7 when we should have numbers. Anyway all of this to say I wanted to play this game doing the absolute minimum and I'm spending hours and hours a day like copy pasting from the group to colin 😂 and now to our group. The problem is colin really believed jared when he said he'd flip and I was like colin no that's EXACTLY what he detailed he'd do in the group. And then Colin and josh were like wait anastasia and brayden may consider flipping and here I was like no y'all they are telling me / us they're saying that. Unless it's like a double play they are lying to you and that's their plan. All I can do is copy paste their exact messages and hope they believe me. I really do think they trust me bc I'm risking my life here. I just need to talk to Josh and explain the situation and I am with him not against him! Honestly this is such a great cast and they are playing very well. It'll be fun to see how it all works out. I don't think I'll be at the end but I would love to see underdogs take it. I would actually love josh elle and Colin at the end and I'd vote colin to win lol he put in work! I'd also vote anastasia to win because she has laid low so well with still having pull in the game. Idk it's a fun one that I think will blow up on me soon but I've been channeling Raffy's chaos and messy style bc I'm just here to have fun not to win actually lol. I am writing this while on a flight so I'll have updates later. Oh right our 4 group plan is to use the chaos idol and throw votes around so that like 2 or 3 people don't have votes then they are the only ones vulnerable in the revote and everyone who got votes is safe. Then we can vote either jared or jodi like that's the thing if jodi doesn't play an idol here I don't think she has one or no one is giving her one. I think my only chance to make it farther is to let the 4 group know I'm with them 100% but still keep my idol for myself hopefully until 6 or 5 but lol idk about that. Like I can see them wanting to take me out then. Okay that's all my thoughts right now.

https://youtu.be/ji7K8HkLmRY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78Ru1J0iXYA&feature=youtu.be

https://youtu.be/rVRVR2zzkPc

https://youtu.be/PAjCL7-GWV

[😬 Not me completely forgetting to send this oops here i'll add a fun quote at the beginning] Jodi is Regina George, we are the schoolbus✨ Sooooooo Colin has a chaos idol how fun for him and tbh im kinda tired so here's the voting plan and the rest you can just kinda glean: Amy - Josh Elle - Colin Josh - Anastasia Colin - Jay ~~~

Edgic:

Power Ranking:

Amy: She has managed to escape suspicion from last round. Nobody believes her to be the rat leaking things to Colin. She is in the best position in this game right now being on all sides and having every single option open to her.

Colin: King of idols. King of chaos. He has it all locked down. Has capitalized on those the Jodi side has burned. Will continue to capitalize on it. The power struglle ends here.

Elle: Mostly just floating behind Colin’s shield which is what she should be doing atm.

Josh: If he stays out of people’s periphery, he can make it far. Might be dragged to end, but could make a great pitch for himself.

Jay: Ruined his position with multiple people last round. Is sort of in the middle? Sort of not? He is definitely aligned with Anastasia and Brayden who are protecting him.

Brayden: If he betrays Jodi, he will shoot up in this ranking. Needs to become a free agent instead of being locked into an alliance.

Anastasia: If she betrays Jodi, she will shoot up in this ranking. Needs to step away from Brayden and Jay who are clouding her good judgment. She is being iced from the other side.

Jared: I don’t know why he is going to use his idol on Jodi? His loyalty to her will be his downfall.

Jodi: Seems to have accepted being voted out this round. Seems to have backed herself into a corner based on her logic. Too worried about advantages to see the right path.

Children of Earth: Day Two

AKA Lois is the most competent person to ever work with Torchwood.

OR: Torchwood somehow finds a new way to torture Jack.

OR: Deadpool 2. No spoilers, but Deadpool 2.

God why the Hub? Why the Hub? I loved the Hub. I miss the Hub. And I added this later on to my post for Day One when I remembered, but I’m gonna say it again here: WHAT HAPPENED TO JANET AND MYFANWY??? ARE THEY OK??? PLEASE TELL ME THEY SOMEHOW MADE IT OUT. These snipers all suck. How do you miss that many times? God I can’t even look at Frobisher and his family without thinking they only have a couple more days to live... Wow this show’s so messed up. I mean, a stolen ambulance is probably the worst get away vehicle if you don’t want to be followed. Andy my baby!! My girl Gwen’s so smart. Shooting the tires. Can’t these SWAT people search Rhiannon’s house without traumatizing her children?? Ok wait do teachers still take away phones like they did in 2009? Because these days, kids are just only on their phones and they take notes with them sometimes so like... teacher’s probably can’t do much. I got my phone taken away in 2009 just because I was trying to turn it off because I forgot to turn it off before school started. “The Prime Minister’s office has refused to speculate until more details are known.” That’s because the details show the government ordered the explosion. I love how snoopy my girl Lois is. Ok wait I paused and read what was written and it says “There are still some private acquisitions which Queen Victoria herself made that are unbeknownst to us.” meaning they’re leaving the door open for more Torchwood-like spin-offs. “As you know, Harkness is a difficult man to kill” UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE CENTURY. “I’ve just put you on the frontline. That’s what the frontline’s for John. First to fall.” Well fuck you too, Mr. Prime Minister. I nearly did not notice the significance of her having a touchscreen phone in 2009. How much money does Alice makes? It’s not an iPhone, but still. There were not that many touchscreen phones in 2009. See, I know that in the comics, when Deadpool was chopped up in a certain way, I think hotdog style not hamburger (LOL Commander Up in Starship), it resulted in two Deadpools reforming from the parts instead of one. So in at least one comic universe there’s a second Deadpool running around. So it makes me wonder if Jack could reform into two Jacks... But I guess the whole fixed point in time thing probably only allows one Jack to exist. Or at least, one Jack to come out of the parts of Jack. Basically Jack’s immortality and invincibility isn’t like a starfish’s the way Deadpool’s is. “Does that mean whoever’s behind the bomb is behind the children thing? Like they wanted him out of the way or something?” My girl Lois. She’s right, the government is partially behind it. LOL Ianto’s just watching. He’s taken over for Jack since he cant stand on any roofs right now. “Shh... we’re probably bugged.” SOMEONE GIVE IANTO’S NEPHEW A JOB AT TORCHWOOD IN 10 YEARS. Ugh my poor baby Jack. Having to regrow himself. Ugh. Ughhhh yep this is the part that’s grossly gorey. Seeing his body as it’s growing back. Ew. I’d hate to be the person who had to make that. Ew he has to cuff the body to the wall. I love that this guard doesn’t care that Lois is peeking in anyway. Even though he just heard her get told to not go in. Johnny’s pretty great. That was such a smart way to cause a diversion. And I forgot to mention it earlier, but I loved him saying “We’re the only family he’s got.” when Rhiannon was upset over Ianto’s note. “He’d have been better off staying dead.” Oh believe me, Jack already knows that. Wow I made myself sad. “What kind of civil servants are you?” “Underappreciated ones.” Now that’s an understatement too. Yeah, Ianto, touching a random girl is not ok. Not even if you’re a civil servant and alien expert. I love that Frobisher wanted to check in on his daughters before talking to the Prime Minister. Wow. This makes everything painful. Remembering them saying his children will be the first ones picked. He loves his daughters more than anything. Oh god. God I love Lois. She’s a little innocent and trusting since she’s like “Why would the government do that?” but also suspicious and nosy since she saw the order to kill Jack in the first place, so she’s trusting Gwen. “Can we trust this guy?” “He’s our guy in the government. If we can’t, we really are in trouble.” OH GIRL. OOOOOH GWEN MY GIRL. YOU HAVE NO IDEA. “Show yourself! Face me like a man!” “I’m not a man” OOOOH I want to love her so much but why must she be evil and trying to kill my babies? I think I remember her becoming good at the end, but I don’t know. It’s been almost 5 years. “I’ve got a floor plan in my bag” GOD MY GIRL LOIS IS SO GOOD. “*Spewing off instructions and plans.* Sugar?” I LOVE HER SO MUCH. “When this is all over, and you want a job, come see me.” SERIOUSLY GIVE LOIS ALL THE MEDALS ALL THE JOBS EVERYTHING. I can’t remember if she survives or not. Also, they should have brought her back for season 4. Though, for all I know they did and I just never watched past episode 1 of that season so I don’t know. Dude, be thankful they didn’t close the coffin. I would have died of claustrophobia if I was put in the coffin tied up, and then they closed the lid. Just knowing I was trapped would be enough to kill me, not even lack of oxygen or starvation. Gwen and Rhys were nice enough to keep it open. Ok but also, why doesn’t he just sit up straight? Even with arms and legs bound, you can sit up. Come on dude, use your ab muscles. This guard’s a complete idiot. Also, you’d think they’d give the guards Gwen and Ianto’s pictures and say “Hey, if you see these people, don’t let them in.”  Ok, this guy thinks Gwen looks familiar, so they did send the pictures, these guards are all just dumb. Wow. At first I was like “LOL body snatchers. What a cute code word for them.” and then just now my brain goes “Invasion of the Body Snatchers. It’s an alien joke.” and I feel dumb. Oh Rhys being overprotective. I love the way Gwen signals Rhys to shut up after the guard goes “You’re a couple, aren’t you?” The little wave of the chattering hand. I love her. Oh poor Rupesh. Why did you pick the wrong side? Yeah, Gwen should have done the clicky thing out of view of that last camera. Oh good old Ianto. I mean. A giant explosion is one way to ensure they don’t follow you. Oh how I love Jack’s dramatic resurrection gasps. Also all I can think about is how John Barrowman had to wear sanitary pads on his feet to protect them from the rocks while filming. “I’d hold onto your nose, Bridget. Though come to think of it, you’ve been doing that for years.” Ooooooh. I like Dekker. I think I said it last episode, but I like him. The framing of each of them standing in line with one of the panels. Nice. “Why are they coming to Britain?” “Why is that, Mr. Frobisher?” I love Dekker. Dekker’s creepy but in kind of a good way. He seems... intrigued by aliens... but also is the only one who seems to realize how bad all of this is. Saying it could be a slaughterhouse, hinting at the fact he hated when they came the first time around, and of course him tracking the 456 frequency for 40 years in the first place. He’s like “Oh, I’ll do what they say, but this is all your faults. I’ve been warning you forever. I’ll do it. But I’m not gonna do it quietly.”

****Deadpool 2 SPOILERS****

Not a major spoiler. Happens in the first like... 10 minutes. The fact that both Deadpool and Jack end up blown up and having their bits and pieces put into a body bag to reform is hilarious to me.

****SPOILERS ARE DONE****

Yeah so I love Lois. This episode is so great if only for the scene where Lois shows us how awesome she is. It’s a great episode in general, but I LOVE that scene. So much.

Oh god the promo. “John Frobisher’s a good man.” Literally that sentence just hurts my heart no matter who says it.

And it’s crazy that literally the alien’s don’t show up until halfway through the season yet it’s still so good.

Hey! How are you doing today? What have you been up to? Do you have any random headcanons for any ship/series that you want to talk about? I love your art! ♡

Aaaah sorry for the late reply and thanks for the ask!! I’ve been doing ok working through commissions and stuff \o/ but I recently found out that my art wasn’t showing up in tags ‘cause I had some privacy option enabled /grumble (that was probably my fault though — I think I turned it on when this wasn’t an art blog yet orz) And yessss I have so many headcanons for huntershipping and some sf dog au stuff, though those are limited to selene and helios since they’re my ultimate spacefaring faves :D

SF Dog AU

- I think I mentioned this before but just in case anyone doesn’t know — Helios used to belong to Selene’s relatives until they had to move back to India. They didn’t want to put him in a pound so they left him with (a very reluctant) Selene. The first few days are pretty much utter chaos. Helios’ breed has a lot of energy that needs loads of exercise so staying locked up in the apartment all day sends him in a cabin fever frenzy ;o; Selene’s job demands that he works long hours so when he returns home his entire flat is pretty much shredded to bits, pillows strewn across the floor, doors scratched, piss everywhere ;_; At first Selene would lock Helios in a room as punishment but obviously it exacerbates the situation till Selene finds Keeler to learn how to care for Helios and train him. Now they’re a lot better with dealing separation, though Helios still scratches the doorframe now and again. Selene has to wake up super early to tire him out by jogging/cycling before heading off to work and walk Helios whenever he returns home (RIP selene’s beauty sleep lol) They have some toys that Helios can play with by himself (like the iFetch, thankfully Helios learns how to use it pretty fast) and go to the dog park/long hikes during the weekends.

- Helios’ left ear flops downwards, which Selene finds super strange ‘cause according to his age it should have grown out of it by now. He plays with it now and then anyway lol (He likes how it smells but won’t admit it doing so ‘cause who smells their dog’s ears?? lmao)

- Selene doesn’t like Abel very much — mostly because the way Abel greets Helios gets him overly excited and slobbery and it’s hard to calm him down afterwards, but partially because he doesn’t like how Helios is more hyped to see Abel than Selene sometimes lol. He thinks Cain’s a bad influence on Helios too — he once caught Helios humping a toy and thinks he picked it up from Cain (Helios is neutered btw)

- Helios fetches Selene his slippers when he returns from work! I’s the first thing Selene sees when he gets home haha. He also still has a jumping problem but they’re working on it.

- Helios is (fortunately!) not afraid of the vacuum. He does follow Selene around when he uses it though, because he likes having his belly vacuumed lmao. Selene has to vacuum super frequently now because oh god, the amount of fur Helios sheds is ridiculous — there is fur in my shoes, my socks, my hair —

- Whenever they visit the pet store Selene lets Helios pick whatever he wants, but after a few trips he realises Helios just picks the first thing he finds near the entrance, so he makes sure to walk a few rounds before letting Helios choose lol. They have sooooo many rope toys now ‘cause of this. (Luckily money isn’t really an issue for Selene)

Pokemon:

- After Gold and Silver exchange numbers they text a little at first, mostly because Silver just types back one-worded replies or just ignores him completely. Silv begrudgingly accepts Gold’s challenges to battle when he calls and always leaves immediately when they’re done, but eventually Gold convinces him to hang out and they get to know each other better \o/ They prefer calling each other ‘cause they get to hear each other’s voices aww

- Gold doesn’t really like Mount Silver ‘cause his meganium hates the cold, plus his team always gets super antsy whenever they explore the area. It’s only until Gold meets Red up there that he realises why. Speaking of Red, the first time Gold sees him he just nopes out of there thinking he saw an actual ghost lmao

- Gold’s a huge fanboy for Green and Red, but he makes a horrible second impression on Green lmao. He ends up puking from all the terrible vertigo Viridian Gym’s spinning tiles cause him lol (It doesn’t help that Gold’s super shit at puzzles lol)

- Gold loves to snuggle up to his starter when he sleeps ;w; I’ve been meaning to draw him sleeping with all the chikorita evolution lines cuddled up around him but there’s like ten million other things I wanna draw too lol. Usually his meganium curls around Gold protectively and he sleeps on its body like a pillow.

- I also mentioned this in a previous post but adult Gold and Silver run a berry farm back in New Bark Town! They have berry picking events every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. The trainer who picks the most berries gets to keep what they collected, and you can catch wild pokemon lurking between the bushes as long as it’s not part of the chikorita horde. Gold also runs a small event every Sunday where you get to challenge him — if you beat him and his meganium you get free shit like TMs and stuff (he literally fights you with one pokemon but of course it’s level 100) This is meant to read like in-game NPC events like in HGSS \o/ Silver also does pokemon physiotherapy on the farm, which is a huge plus ‘cause chikorita leaves emit a naturally calming scent.

- Every chikorita is named after the berry patch they tend to, e.g. Oran, Sitrus, Payapa etc. (Usually the berry flavour corresponds to their nature as well)

- Every time they have to mow the grass the chikoritas have to be locked in a room lol — the scent of freshly cut grass makes them go fucking crazy (fun fact: the smell of cut grass is actually a distress signal) They’re kept indoors for a few hours at least.

- Silver actually has a favourite chikorita! It’s a timid but adorable bean named Pecha that gets cold easily so it always wears a wooly sweater come fall. More often than not it wobbles happily to Silv for one-sided cuddles but every now and then he’ll sneakily scoop it up in his arms for hugs aww (don’t tell Gold)

- Not so much of a headcanon, but I still find this pretty funny lol (/fingerguns @violetnyte)

Aaaah I should have more but nothing comes to mind (and it’s super late orz) Here’s a small pic I did of Gold — I tried imitating one of those Gold/Silver pixiv artist’s style because the way they draw Gold is soooo adorable ;w; (Unfortunately they deleted their pixiv but smol gold lives in everyone’s hearts)

Editing (and writing) tips

I recently got a question asking about writing tips in general, and especially related to editing. For privacy reasons, as usual, I won’t name the person–but I’m writing a post here instead of replying directly because 1) I always ramble like fuuuuuuuck and 2) maybe someone else out there is curious about the same thing from my perspective.

First, as always, I’m obviously not a professional. You’ll definitely want to go with what professionals say, if anything goes against my thoughts. But for what it’s worth, I helped a family member edit her book and a professional who worked with her on the book was really impressed with my feedback. Which I am not saying to pat myself on the back; I say only to mention that maybe, hopefully, some of this is useful and not totally leading people down the wrong path lol

If it’s easier for you to read this on another site, or if it doesn’t let you click the “read more” link, you can find this entire post also on my blog here: https://aisness.wordpress.com/2017/07/04/editing-and-writing-tips/

Writing

I have some posts on writing advice here: http://ais-n.tumblr.com/tagged/writing-advice — and there should be some that Santino and/or I wrote under “writing questions” here: https://aisness.wordpress.com/2016/05/01/icos-master-list-feb-2016-edition (Note that there may be some overlap between the two links, also I’m not sure if all those links still work–if you see any specifically that don’t, let me know).

I have lots of thoughts on writing, but they’re all pretty informed by my personal writing style which is very much aimed toward writing what makes sense for that story and those characters, and “rules” be damned. I don’t like the idea of confining oneself to expectations if it interferes with the natural, organic progression of a story. That does mean I tend to go pretty hardcore into stuff I write because if I’m writing a dark story, I’m not going to pull punches; and I tend to add a fair amount of darkness into my stories because it doesn’t feel realistic to me otherwise. But this also means my style doesn’t work for people who want to feel like they always know what’s coming or at least know the limits to which the story will go. After all, as we’ve seen, you cannot trust me to not totally fuck up a character because it feels like the right progression for me. And that’s not fun for some people to read, you know? But it’s super hard for me to write a more chill story because it’s not the kind of story I tend to read. I try to do it and then I get bored, but other people can do that same concept and story in a fantastically beautiful way and really excel at it.

What I mean by this aside is that I have maybe a bit of an odd  viewpoint on writing stories compared to some more traditional or mainstream views, so that may make me a terrible person to ask for thoughts for you, or it may make me someone who vibes better with your personal style. I think it’s most important we’re all genuine to ourselves so whatever writing style works for you is the perfect style for your stories. There’s a story out there for every occasion, every voice, every idea, every feeling.

There is no right or wrong way to write; in my opinion, the only way you can do anything “wrong” is by not believing in your own personal voice, your own personal style; by silencing your individuality if it doesn’t fit the stronger, louder voice. If it does fit, that’s perfect and you should run with it. If it doesn’t, don’t change yourself or your world or characters or story into something it isn’t. That feeling of dissonance will be what is taken away from your story instead of the story itself, at least to readers like me. Because I do believe what Maya Angelou said is true: people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. In my personal opinion both as a reader and a writer, I think that applies to stories as well.

I also think research is really important but I guess that’s a whole other thing. I’m getting too much into writing tips right now so I’ll leave it at this and the linked posts above — but if anyone is curious about anything in particular, let me know. If you’d be curious about my personal thoughts on anything, I’m happy to answer

Editing:

Editing is a pain, but also kind of fun. I have a few thoughts on it– most of what I’m first talking about below is you editing your own work. I touch a little on editing someone else’s work afterward.

**Read or edit for the overall flow as much (or IMO more) than you do the specific grammatical nitpicking. I know that’s going to go against what a lot of people feel about editing, but here’s the thing: stories are translations of the heart, whether it’s the heart of the overall story, the heart of the writer, the heart of the characters, the heart of the reader, the heart of whatever it represents. To me, a story is poetry on a larger scale, or it’s a song, or it’s whatever artistic endeavor that represents something that, to you, feels moving or meaningful.

Yes, it’s important that we understand what you’re trying to say. For that, yes, having someone check the grammar is definitely useful.

But the rules of grammar are not the rules of language. That may sound like an odd thing to say because, yeah, technically it is– but think about when you’re learning a new language. If it’s anything like when I’ve taken classes in the multiple languages I’ve taken classes in, the teacher tells you all the specific grammatical rules so you’re speaking properly, politely, in complete sentences with all the correct intonation and all the right tenses. You can definitely get your thoughts across if you learn a language that way, in that people will understand the concept of what you’re saying because you are literally speaking textbook to them.

But then think about your native language. Do you speak or type grammatically correct all the time? Do you avoid contractions, run-on sentences, do you not indulge in hyperbole, do you not have fun dropping an Oxford comma or two? If you’re feeling an intense emotion, aren’t you even more likely to play the strings of the language you know best? Changing vocabulary to emphasize meaning or form, adding intensity in your tone or your chosen verbal attack, throwing in swear words or cutting your sentences in half then in half again and again until it’s just partial words because you’re too upset or excited or something else to properly form a complete sentence?

There may be people out there who don’t do this, I don’t know. But for me, this is how I function, and it seems to me how a lot of people around me function. We rarely speak perfectly politely, perfectly properly, in our native tongue 100% of the time. Even languages built very much on the concept of polite and proper, even cultures with a clear sense of in group vs out group, have variations set in place in their language to indicate intimacy, friendship, a sense of understanding. Those levels are there so we can share that connection with others in something as simple as the word we choose when we call them, or the name we use when they come close.

To me, stories are like levels of language. There are different ways of telling the stories based on the story that’s being told. If it’s a character who’s distant or cold, or a setting that requires a sense of detachment, writing in very proper, polite, grammatically perfect sentences makes sense because it provides that sense of out group you would get in your native tongue. If it’s a story that should feel visceral, cloying, catastrophically vulnerable, then it’s meaningful to write in an ebb and flow of emotion dependent on the feeling of the character or the feeling the writer wants to create within the reader. Words breathe life into the story they relay, so the chosen words matter. Most of the time, I think stories benefit from a variation in the telling of them; perfect in some places, very imperfect in others, a constant reflection of the tapestry of emotions and motion in the world or story itself, or a view into the mind of the character displayed.

So, although it’s important to have someone who can help with any egregious and unhelpful grammatical mistakes, or spelling errors or the like, I also don’t think that should be the primary focus. It’s the sort of thing that’s important to take into account so that no poor wording accidentally jolts the reader from the story, but it shouldn’t be the be all and end all because that could result in losing the more emotional flow needed for what the story is trying to get across.

I think of it like this: writers are the translators for a character’s life. How would the characters feel at different points in the story, and therefore how best can that be worded to make the reader feel the same way reading it? How can you make the reader feel like they are experiencing that same emotion the character is feeling? That’s the best way to bring alive a world or plot or character, in my mind: by making it real.

**Read, reread, reread again, but leave time in between. One of the best things I think you can do right after you finish writing a story is set it aside and do not touch it or think about it for a time period that makes sense for the length of story you wrote, or whatever makes sense for you as a person. I like to give it at least a week, and if it’s a story I worked on for a long time, maybe even months.

Obviously you have to go according to if you have a deadline or not, or whatever other factors are affecting you in your life and situation. If it’s a short story, okay then maybe you really only need to set it aside for a day or a few hours before getting back in there. But if it’s something you labored on at length, you need to give yourself a clarity you can’t achieve by immediately starting over at the top. I wrote Incarnations over the course of 20 years, for example, and I ended up finishing it in October 2016, set it aside for most of November and December, did the occasional spot checking and spot editing throughout through February or March 2017, and didn’t really fully reread it until May 2017. Now it’s going into July 2017, and I’m still editing it again, I just started rereading from the start, and I’m still finding things that can use improvement. But I’m happy about it, because the improvements I’m seeing are ones that I think are valuable, and they’re things I obviously didn’t notice any of the many times I reread these early chapters in the years preceding this month.

So, finish your story and then push it aside and don’t think about it right away. Do other things. I like to watch TV shows I like, play games that are fun, turn to manga, whatever it is that relaxes you and may also inspire you, without being too closely connected to the source material (aka, your book) where it won’t let you fully get that distance. That’s why I like to use other media like movies, TV shows, etc, instead of other books because it’s too easy to fall back into a comparative mindset on something too parallel.

That sounds a little crazy, I know, but you could send it off to other people in that interim if that makes sense to you. (That’s what I did — in October when I finished Incarnations, I sent it to my 4 betas which then gave them plenty of time to look it over in the months I was laying low. And just in late June I got another beta who is looking at the whole thing with fresh eyes, which is good because now she has the  copy of the book that included all the improvements I made between myself and my betas’ suggestions.) I think it’s important to have that break, whether you send it to others or simply set it aside for no one to read for some time. You don’t want to go so long that you never pick it up again, but you want to give yourself time to distance yourself from all the decisions big and small you made in the course of writing it.

The reason for this is so that when you go back and reread it from beginning to end, you are looking at it with fresh eyes. You’re going to be more likely to notice things that need fixing that way; whether it’s a poorly done transition, or maybe an idea on how to improve a whole section, or maybe you realize you need to remove this piece so that another part shines. Ideally, you will want to reread a few times, and give yourself some space again in between at some point.

You will always find things you missed or things that need to be improved, no matter how many times you reread and edit it, no matter how many people look at it. Stories are living, breathing evolutions of the heart. They will always feel both very right and very wrong, because they will always strike you a little different every time you review them.

**Save everything! This is another suggestion that probably a lot of people will disagree with, but personally I’m a pack rat. I keep all the old versions of everything I ever write, because I find it helpful sometimes to pull inspiration from the past, or to double check that I made the right decision on this or that. Or sometimes in the course of editing and rereading and reviewing, you’ll realize that a scene you wrote previously that you removed is one that still keeps coming back to you.

That happened with me in Incarnations, to give you an example to explain what I mean. As I mentioned, I’ve been working on that book on and off for 20 years. In the course of that time, I kept writing new beginnings to the book,  doing random new scenes, trying to find something to jumpstart my interest in a story I loved but a book that was hard for me to write. In one of those incarnations (no pun intended  ;p), I had a scene of some characters walking into a town, and the way that town felt to the POV character. I actually wrote probably 3 or 4 versions of this same scene, from different POVs, of them walking into this town. I really liked the scene, and I really wanted that scene to start the book for a long time, and for a long time it did.

At some point I chose a different character’s POV as the main scene, and then eventually I decided to cut out that scene entirely and take pieces of it with the same POV character but write a totally different scenario. So I ended up scrapping that entire start of a chapter I had. I know many people who would simply delete that because it isn’t relevant anymore, but being a pack rat, I didn’t.

Years passed and I got to the point in the book where all the characters go to that town. But because of the way I was jumping back and forth chronologically between character POVs, I decided to totally scrap the scene of them entering the town, and instead you would see them heading toward it, then the next time you saw them they would have been there for hours and there would be a recap in narration of what happened up until that point. I felt like that was fine in writing it and editing it and that’s what I did. But then, after I gave myself those months of not rereading it front to back, after I gave myself time to spot check other parts, when I reread it with fresh eyes I felt like it was jarring having that time skip.

I needed to add back in a scene of them entering the town; of the impact it had on them. If I had deleted that scene for good, it would have been incredibly frustrating for me because I remembered liking what I’d had before, I remembered having most of it written out, I knew it would be so much faster to find that and add it back in and edit it for flow instead of rewriting from scratch. And because I keep everything, because I use Scrivener where everything is in one place, because I have it organized just well enough for me to know where to find the folder of old chapters and old chapter parts, it was easy for me to find that scene, incorporate it into a new chapter, and edit out the narration info dump in the other chapter that had thrown off the flow.

When you’re on your 3rd, 4th, 20th time of rereading or editing a story, it’s way too frustrating to think about having to write something completely new. It feels like, come on, I should be over that part, I should have the freedom to not have to totally write a brand new chapter. But you may find that previous ideas you had actually do work better to bring back into the fold instead of leaving out. If you delete everything you did along the way, you will double or triple your frustration at the point you need it. And if you’re anything like me, you may delay yourself significantly in going forward because you’ll be too frustrated by your lack of forethought to want to deal with what you need to do in the present.

You may find you never reuse your old bits and pieces–you may think, that doesn’t apply to me, if I delete something I know I want it gone for good, I don’t care about what it was before because if I need to add something I want to add something brand new. That may be how you function so that may work wonderfully and therefore, you may be tempted to delete things just so you get it out of your way. I would still recommend saving everything, for an entirely different reason as well. It’s nice to see where you were, to know where you are now. It can be good for yourself to see how you used to write so you can see your improvements.

But even more than that, if your story ever makes it big or even has a meaningful impact on one other person, they may really appreciate having that insight into how the story started vs what it became. I know I personally like having that insight for myself, and for stories I enjoy I always love to have all the drafts and tidbits and whatever else I can find, because it makes the world feel even more real to me. It can be inspirational to other people, or it can simply be a fun extra for a story or world they adore.

Think about JKR — think of all the people who would love to have the airplane bag she wrote the Hogwarts houses on first, or the notepads she originally wrote the plot ideas on, because Harry Potter is important to them. She may have seen those as something to throw away back then, in the case of the airplane bags something literally made to be discarded, and yeah it was just ink on a throwaway bag. But it was the beginning of something so much more. She can never get back that bag if she throws it out, but if she keeps it, it can be a constant reminder to her of where she started and where she is now, or an inspiration to other writers that you don’t need all the biggest and best programs and computers and training to write. You just need a story you want to tell, and a means to write it down.

**Notes are great. Speaking of notes, I think they’re great! I use Scrivener when I’m writing, and it helps soooooo much in editing too. One of the things I do as I write and edit and reread is I’m constantly leaving comments to myself in the story. I leave comments about “this is what’s happening in the background of this scene” or “this is what’s meaningful about this particular wording from the character” or “this is what that means even though it won’t come up for a long time” or “why did I do this? check if I want to keep it” or “hey I just got a great idea on how I can incorporate this into a future idea, note to self remember to add this in later” and so on and so forth. Because I’m wordy as fuck, some of those comments are basically a short story on their own. But they give me so much more context than I  would have otherwise had, and there have been many times that I totally forgot about the significance of something, only to see it mentioned in a comment and say to myself, “Oh hey! That’s actually really cool…”

When editing, those comments are invaluable to help remind me of what I was thinking when I first wrote something. Also, it helps me see if something bugged me in previous rereading or editing, so that I can decide if I do eventually want to delete or change a part or if I want to keep it. It lets me compare my current editing thoughts against previous editing or writing thoughts, which gives me a much more faceted view of every step along the way.

**Have beta readers, ideally from different perspectives. I think having multiple, trusted people read your story is important after you’ve finished it. They will have an outside perspective you won’t, and they may notice things you missed. They may have great ideas for improvement that wouldn’t have occurred to you, and they may have feedback for some of the ideas you had that just aren’t working for them as readers. You want that variance of view because it will give you a much more faceted experience of your story than you would get if you only look at it yourself, or only choose yes men as your feedback.

**Find a critic. Along the lines of beta readers, it’s important to have betas who will read the story for the overall flow, the overall emotional impact, and give you feedback on that. How did the story make them feel? How did the characters connect or not connect with them, and why? These are important factors in a story. And yeah, maybe this character shouldn’t be connecting with readers, maybe that’s the whole point– but then that gives you a good idea that you were on the right track with how you wrote that.

But you can never improve if you only seek out people who will tell you all the great things you’re doing, and none of the bad. No story is perfect, there is no book that can’t be improved. You don’t want to get all the way to the point of releasing the story and only then find all the flaws in it, where it becomes a criticism on a grander scale and can even affect word of mouth, or whether or not people choose to read it. You will never make it perfect, but it’s good to know ahead of time what people may fault the story for, so you have time to determine if you find fault in that as well and want to fix it, or if for you it’s something that is there purposefully, that shouldn’t change, at which point you will have a better answer ready for when the questions come about why this or why that.

Find someone who will constructively criticize your story–someone who will nitpick details, challenge the rules of the world, ask you to explain or justify why this or that choice was made. You should be able to answer all those questions, give reasons for all those challenges. If you can’t, that gives you a really good view of the parts of your story that may need improvement, or perhaps areas that don’t flow well with the rest.

Find the level of critic that makes sense for what you’re doing. If you’re doing a fun little story that isn’t a serious endeavor, then you don’t need someone who will rip it to shreds because that may not be the point of the story. But if you’re writing an epic series with an intricate plot, it would behoove you to get that other perspective that will be pulling apart the story as they read to give you clues to what thoughts may be going through a reader’s mind, and what needs to be added, changed, or removed to improve that experience.

Again, it’s important this person gives you constructive criticism — just being told you write like shit isn’t helpful. You need someone who will pinpoint problem areas and tell you why and how it needs help. Ideally, that person will also be a great bouncing board for you to figure out solutions to those problems.

**Follow critical people. Another thing I like to do is find people who do constructive criticism of books we all know or love; popular series, indie series, it doesn’t matter. There are writers, editors, critics, etc, out there who post about why they did or didn’t like this or that thing. You need to find someone who is fair about it; who doesn’t just rip into everything to be a jerk, but who will constructively address issues they see in stories in whatever media they follow.

Having them go through stories we all know can be really useful, because then you have something to compare against as a fellow reader. Do you agree with their criticism or assessment of this story or that plot or this character? Why or why not? Do you never agree with their criticisms, or do you mostly agree but sometimes not? That will give you a really good idea of where they’re coming from in their own perspective when they’re looking at stories, so then you know how to interpret recommendations they give generally or specifically in stories they’re reading.

You can then look at what they’re saying about these books you have also read, what they see as the problems and what they see as the solutions, and then apply that mindset to your own story and try to see from the perspective they would have for your work. What do you think they would say needs to change? What do you think they would say is the reason? Do you agree? How can you adjust it so that their criticism wouldn’t apply but that you still feel comfortable you are keeping the story real to its needs?

One of my favorite people who does this is Whitley over at http://readingwithavengeance.com/. She also has a whole section on writing tips or thoughts here: http://readingwithavengeance.com/tagged/on-writing. What I like about Whitley is she’s funny and snarky in places, but she isn’t mean. She explains why she feels how she feels, she will be very critical of things that make no sense to her, but she gives suggestions for how it might have been improved, and even in a book she loathes she will always say if this or that line or part or plot point actually is done well. Also, she usually overviews what’s happening and often goes chapter by chapter, so you could read an entire book through her criticisms alone, and know everything that happened in the book while also knowing how she felt about it. It’s sort of like having director commentary for a book, only it’s critic commentary. I used to religiously follow her blog and haven’t as much lately only because I’m on tumblr less, but I do love her perspective from when I followed her in the past. I actually was going to hire her to review Incarnations, but the book is so long that it would cost me a fortune to have her look at it, which is a shame because I think she would have a wonderful perspective. But speaking of, some of the people who are critics like Whitley actually can be hired as an editor of your book–consider that as an option if it makes sense for you.

But you don’t have to agree with Whitley–I mention her as an example of someone I personally really like, but you may like someone else. Point being, find that person who resonates with you, see what issues they have with stories they are critiquing, and turn that critical thinking onto your own story to see if you fall into the same tropes as that book and if so, see if you think it can be improved.

**Don’t be afraid to change things, and don’t be afraid to keep things. Make the story true to the world, the characters, and you; don’t compromise anything that’s really important to you to keep, just because someone says it doesn’t meet expectations or genre rules or whatever other explanation. But also don’t just dismiss what they’re saying because you don’t like it; really consider their feedback, their point of view, their suggestions. If it’s something that’s too important to keep, then even if they recommend you remove it, figure out a compromise that lets you keep what you want to keep without detracting from the quality of the overall story. Value their contributions and their viewpoint without replacing your own with theirs simply because you’re insecure.

**Don’t see editing as an extended means of failure. Don’t see editing as something that is only showing you your failures. If there are a lot of mistakes in your story, if a lot of things need to be changed, if you feel like in the end you’re changing more than you’re keeping–none of this is indicative of failure, and so you shouldn’t feel down about it. It’s all about improving the rough edges of your story so it can truly shine, and in that way it will not detract from the characters or world or plot it covers.

Constructive criticism and beta readers can provide an invaluable source of feedback, but it’s also important you ask them to tell you what does work. You need to know where you did well for the story, and where it can be improved. But know that improving something isn’t showing you failed in the original writing of it; it only means you wrote something well enough that people understood where you wanted to go with it, but you didn’t have the other perspectives yet on how to take it there even further. We are all human beings with our own singular POV. That’s why it’s important to get those other thoughts, to help us expand our view. We still did a great job in the original writing of it no matter how much needs to change, because we still wrote it. We still got something out there into the world that wasn’t there before. We still became the voice for that world or character. All we’re doing now is finding a way to polish that voice so more people on a larger scale understand it better.

**Don’t let the rules rule you. There is a risk of me sounding a bit sassy in this section and I genuinely don’t mean to, but this happens to be a major frustration I have generally in life which comes out pretty well in this concept. I feel like I see people reference this idea of genre expectations sometimes in writing, and I don’t get it. I know, I know, I probably am the odd one out on this; I probably have a strange perspective that the professionals would say is all wrong. Maybe they’re right, or maybe I just don’t understand what people are trying to say. But the way I interpret this concept I’ve seen– that you have to fit certain rules to be “successful”–it’s just… it’s something that is so against the way I feel about life that it’s hard for me to reconcile.

The thing is, stories shouldn’t be cookie cutter. Sometimes they can fall into that mindset if everyone is so concerned with meeting the rules placed upon them that they aren’t following the rules or flow of their own world or story.

I personally feel like the library would be a pretty boring place if literally every book checked all the boxes and stayed in the boundaries of its particular genre. There’s no room for innovation there; no room for growth as a writer. At least, not for me for the way I write. Maybe for others, the boundaries of a genre don’t at all feel like all any sort of inhibitor for the story they can and will write, and so for them it probably makes a lot of sense to look at those rules and follow them because it may give them some parameters to start with for the story they want to write. I’m not saying people are wrong for following those rules or expectations if it works well for them; they should do whatever is most comfortable for them, most accurate to their ideals or tendencies. There are probably some phenomenal books out there that very much follow the rules of the genre, that stay within the boundaries, because those stories fit the genre so perfectly. But n that scenario,the writer is still being true to the story, it’s just that the way of being true to that story naturally remains within the genre itself. They aren’t compromising their world or story or book to stay in the boxes; their story flourishes in that area and doesn’t need to expand beyond it; may even be detrimental if it did.

That works perfectly well for them so they should do what’s best for them. But for those who don’t naturally feel comfortable staying in boundaries, or whose stories don’t tend to remain confined to a singular genre, they shouldn’t change no matter what they’re told. We need that variation in stories, in writers, in worlds. When people say that a story needs to stay within this or that box because of this or that reason, maybe because not every book can be LOTR or ASOIAF/GOT, or whatever, yeah, that’s true. Not every book can. But those series are well known because they were not conventional. Not everyone can be GRRM, yeah. But GRRM is GRRM, and probably was told he couldn’t be Tolkien. And Tolkien was probably told he was crazy.

Most really famous writers will tell you that they were rejected repeatedly before their story was accepted, even if that story is now astoundingly popular or considered groundbreaking in some form.

That’s why I don’t think it’s wise to listen to “you can only do __” because if everyone only does the same thing, then how is there any innovation or variety?

I’m not saying there’s nothing of value by staying within boundaries–there could be incredibly interesting, or well written stories, or even really creative ones, staying within the bounds. But not everyone who stays within boundaries will always be able to remain unique from everyone else stuck in those same boundaries. Eventually, as a numbers game, it will come to a point where much of the stories become reflective of each other.

Sort of like how you can have canon, then all the fanfic writers start writing their stories and being inspired by each other and having a lot of fun coming up with details to fill in the blanks of their information–and everyone is so inspired by and informed about the other stories in their same field that little details start to reflect each other. And then soon those ideas become facts that become indistinguishable from canon, even though they are fanon. Now, everyone is reflecting the same false concept because everyone saw it so frequently that they came to view it as a rule rather than an idea. That doesn’t at all mean all those fanfics are bad; there can still be phenomenally written ones in that fandom. But it does mean that now everyone is playing the same cards in slightly different ways, because they forgot that they could move beyond them. And now, a character who  had blue eyes in canon suddenly has purple because it transitioned from blue to indigo to blue-purple to purple, and now we’re all calling them something they aren’t, because we all thought we had to follow the same set of data points in a situation that is meant to give a person freedom from those expectations. That is, until someone else comes along who says, “Hey, I looked at the canon again and noticed the character’s eyes are blue, so now I’m going to write a story divorced from the unspoken rules of fanon” and if their story has merit, if what they wanted to tell was a good story and done well, they become a new voice bringing new ideas and new life info a fandom that had accidentally, in its love and devotion for the originating source, found itself stuck in self-assigned boundaries of expectations and rules that didn’t need to be there.

That’s how I see the concept of having to only write by the rules. If it works for the story, then go for it. If it doesn’t work for the story, don’t compromise just to check off those boxes.

Readers respond to the truth of a story, whatever that truth may be. They will notice more if a story is stifled to fit rules than they will if a story expands beyond the rules it was given, in order to grow.

If you want a comparison — In the Company of Shadows is a story some people really like. But when Santino and I wrote it, we knew absolutely nothing about the m/m genre. We just wrote what we wrote because it made sense for the story, the world, the characters, and we released it on AFFN and eventually it made its way through word of mouth into the m/m genre reading community. There are a lot of aspects of ICoS that don’t fit the genre, and some things that probably are considered something you should not do. But those are the parts of ICoS that people seem to value the most. If we had gone into that story deciding that the only  way to write a m/m series was to first immerse ourselves in the genre, and write down all the rules, and then follow them completely, ICoS would not be the story it is. And in my opinion, it would not have resonated with a lot of the people it did resonate with, and so it would not have had the impact it’s had. There are stories in m/m that flourish in m/m and they don’t need to change. ICoS is not one of them.

I was told, years ago, by someone who had been a friend that she didn’t need to read ICoS to know it would be shit, because I had told her how we wrote what we wrote because it felt right, and we didn’t know anything about the genre, we didn’t follow any rules. Her perspective was that it couldn’t possibly be good if it didn’t. She felt that it was imperative to know those rules first, to follow the genre boundaries, because otherwise it wasn’t going to fit that genre and therefore wouldn’t be a good story. This woman was upset at the time she said these things, so it’s possible she didn’t 100% mean everything she said, but I do think she did fully believe that perspective and viewpoint. There may have been other reasons going into why she said these things, perhaps something she had been told for her own stories that became a source of frustration for her that found an outlet in our conversation. I don’t know. All I know is, I will never agree with the idea that the value of a story is solely in the rules it follows, rather than the story itself.

**When you think you’re completely finished, set it aside for a little bit and read it again. You’ll probably find more things you want to change. And if not, you’ll  have the satisfaction of work well done and finally finished. Maybe you’ll be able to see all the wonderful scenes you wrote more that way. I find that happens for me… I can be pretty down about what I write, but if I give myself enough time and go back and reread it from a fresh perspective, sometimes I surprise myself in reading scenes or interactions or wording. Sometimes I think that something I did was genuinely well done. It’s important to give myself that allowance, that acknowledgment, as much as it is to always remember that I will never write a perfect story, and I will never reach a point where I can’t improve.

But that can be part of the adventure. Where can you go next as a writer? The idea of getting better doesn’t have to be something negative, looking at all the things you did wrong and how you weren’t good enough the first time. In my darker days that’s how I see things, but it doesn’t have to be that way. It can be something incredibly positive. Look at how much I can still learn, look at how far I can still expand, look at all the growth I have available to me in my future. That’s amazing. That’s something that gives me an endless source of education–which will allow me to always and always reach out in new and improved ways, to forge new connections and strengthen those new and valuable understandings.

The book Incarnations was 20 years ago, back when I called it Calling of the Onyx, back when it had some of the same characters but was completely different, back when I was that 12-14 year old kid wanting to write a fantasy novel about a female main character navigating her world of magic, with her getting to be the savior instead of some random male character always taking charge–that book had potential, but it had a long way to go. I recognized that even then; knew it wasn’t as good as it could be, and that’s what made me stop before I finished it and  start over, then start over again and again as the years passed, as I gained new life experiences, as I got a broader understanding of the world, as I had new ideas on how to improve or change or mitigate what I already had written. Calling of the Onyx was a passable book. It probably would have been considered good or at least decent for a preteen kid to write. Incarnations is so much better. Whether or not people will like it when it’s out, inherently Incarnations is a major improvement because I learned so much more in my life in the process of getting to the point where I could write a cohesive story, and finish the book for the first time. Now it’s part of a series, now it’s part of something much larger than it would have been before. There is great value in what was Calling of the Onyx, in the ideas I had back then, and that value helped inform the story I wrote over the following 20 years. But if I had stopped at CotO, if I had told myself I had to play by those rules only, I would have lost out on a lot of what came next. I wouldn’t have added so much more to the world building that I did, I wouldn’t have expanded the character base so much, I wouldn’t have done a lot of things.

Incarnations being a better book doesn’t devalue CotO; it honors what it was, and expands it into something more, something new with a reflective nod to the past. That’s what you can do any time you edit a story; value the old while honoring the new; honoring the old while valuing the new. With that willingness to listen to your thoughts and your betas, you can find a version of the story that fits its world or context best, without losing what makes it unique or meaningful.

And now that I spent so much more time waxing poetic about editing, it’s probably way too much to go into examples of how I edit other peoples’ work. If that’s something anyone has interest in, let me know and I can find examples that won’t contain spoilers or privacy concerns, or show a way of editing my own work as if I were editing someone else’s.

I don’t know if anything I said in this long post is of use to anyone. I do have an inherent need to push back against rules that I see as labels that try to confine or define me in ways I don’t agree with, because that’s something that is sort of inherent to me as a person. As an asexual, as a lesbian, as someone who’s so often been on the outside of the “norm” in so many big and small ways, I react strongly to being told I have to be boxed in by other peoples’ expectations. That informs a lot of the way I write and read stories; I don’t want to feel stifled there any more than I want to feel stifled in my living, breathing life. I don’t mean to be rude to anyone who feels otherwise about the way they write or edit, and I am not at all saying they are doing anything wrong– if it’s right for them, then in fact it’s extremely right for them to do.

But if you are a person like me, a writer or a reader who feels the way I feel on these things, then maybe the way I look at editing or writing will help you. Because at the very least, you’ll know you aren’t alone.

If that resonates with you, you may find some of the other posts I’ve made in the past to be helpful, like Never regret you and the Equality of Differences. Or, you may find some peace or connection in perusing my about Ais tag on my blog as linked or here on tumblr -- or my personal category on my blog. Whatever you choose, I’m wishing you all the very best.