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#None of these makr sense
jhonnyhotbody · 9 months
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I love drawing speedsrers rynning
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mikami · 1 year
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tbh even if it was accidental i think L makes for better autistic rep than a lot of characters intended to be autistic. yes the autistic genius trope isnt great but a lot of the time that trope translates to "super genius whos vaguely awkward and MAYBE doesn't make eye contact if the writers thought about that" but L has other things that could be read as autistic traits (sitting in strange positions, only eating sweets, etc) that makr him feel less. superficially autistic if that makes sense? like, the amount of time people have commented on me eating lots of sweets even though my eating habits are none of their business is insane. so yeah, L isnt the greatest autistic rep but hes not thz worst either even if it wasn't like, intentional
Yeah, this pretty much reflects how I've seen L talked about by other autistic members of the fandom.
I'm... probably not autistic (diagnostic appointment upcoming, lmao) so I can't comment on it too hard myself, but I've seen him mean a lot to so many people that I'd be very hard pressed to call his writing horrible in this regard.
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matoitech · 2 years
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‘if promare had a romance it would be in the romance genre’ butyou realize thats not how movies work right like thats not how romances in movies and fiction as a whole works like a lot of things have romances and it doesnt make the genre a romance. also sometimes it IS CATEGORIZED THRU THE ROMANCE GENRE ANYWAY SO I DONT UNDERSTAND YOUR ISSUE
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tr1gg3rw4rn1ng · 3 years
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ugghhgggh why can't i have a stable opinion on other people or myself
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yan-twst · 4 years
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What would the dorms leaders do if one day Darling just desapear and no one can remember except them can remember them?
warnings: none really? i guess this could induce paranoic thoughts in some people so there's that! oh and angst
riddle rosehearts
at first, trey assumes riddle just finally snapped (again) and went a bit crazy. he keeps asking about his "darling" and looking for them; what is he talking about?? nobody seems to even remember just a day ago riddle was walking hand in hand with his beloved
he'll immediately try to ask crowley, only to be shot down. what? the school has no non-magic students, why would riddle ask about that?
he becomes panicked and stressed. why can nobody remember them? where are they? why is he the only one who remembers them? moreover, how does he undo all of this?
he'll stress over this for the rest of his life. sure, over time he'll manage to get over the grief of losing his lover so suddenly, but he won't ever doubt his memories. he'll keep asking and looking- he knows they existed, he has to find them one day
leona kingscholar
is this another one of ruggie's pranks? he fell asleep with his darling on the bed and now not only are they gone, but ruggie is pretending he doesn't even know who his darling is? what the hell does he mean leona fell asleep alone, his darling was clearly here-
or... not. he freezes when he realizes there's no trace of his darling's scent: not just on the bed, in his whole room. nothing. not even a faint trace of them: as if they had never set foot into the room at all.
he feels nauseous when he runs and sees ramshackle dorm as abandoned and empty as it used to be, no traces of it ever being reinhabited. all of his darling's personal trinkets back in his room are gone, their dorm reverted to the state it was in, not a soul even knows who they are- leona despairs
was it just a dream or something? had he truly been so misserable he dreamed up about half a year worth of school life and meeting a fake person, fell in love with them, dated, and then woke up? it sure feels that way, but the calendar tells him those days did pass; just somehow, his darling is gone and nobody remembers them
he might even try attending class for clues. is it a curse? a spell? what the hell is going on?! where was his darling taken? he can't even sleep, knowing he'll dream of them; he'll keep searching. he has to- after all, if he loses his darling, what the hell else does he have?
azul ashengrotto
he's upset when his darling doesn't seem to come greet him in the cafeteria in the morning, and comments that they're late. jade and floyd stare at him like he grew a third head. who's late?
he gets angry and agitated when the twins become confused. his darling- how could they forget?! they eat breakfast with the three of them every morning! ... but as much as he lists on, the twins look more and more confused- eventually jade concludes azul must be feverish and tells him to go rest, he'll tell the teachers
azul is so shocked he just goes back to his room. there's no traces of his darling he noticed- any gifts they'd given to him, any personal belongings they might have left there... are gone. looking through his contracts, any contract where his darling was even mentioned seems to be different: no mention of his darling
he's a ruined man. where is his darling? did they leave and erase everyone's memories but his? or were they taken away and he's unable to help? he'll cry about it quite often; he's mourning and grieving a person who doesn't exist in other's minds.
kalim al-asim
he's equally as confused as jamil when he mentions his darling's name and jamil has no clue who he's talking about. what? is he playing a prank or did he hit his head?
he'll try to prove jamil must be sick by asking a randomscarabia studet- surely they must know! after all, kalim brings his darling to every dorm pary and makes them the center of attention! ... but the student apologizes and says he has no clue who kalim's darling is
desperation creeps in the more he asks people and the more they say they don't know who that person he speaks of is. eventually, he's panicking, and jamil is exhausted and ticked off. he thinks kalim is playing games or trying to prank him somehow, and finally tells kalim to lay off.
kalim feels empty and confused. is he... the one on the wrong? did he truly make up his darling...? no, that can't be! just a week ago he danced with them and took them on a magic carpet ride! ... right? that did happen, right?
the more time goes on, the more anxious he becomes. are his memories wrong or is everyone else wrong? but- what are the chances he's the only person who remembers? all traces of them are gone, like they never existed; is he the crazy one...?
vil schoenheit
what. is going. on?
at first he's shocked to see all his magicam posts with his darling are deleted. not archived- deleted!! did someone hack his account? no, it doesn't seem to be the case. now that he notices, all traces of his darling seem to have been scrubbed clean off social media...
he tries to go talk to his darling- to find ramshackle dorm abandoned and worn down, as it'd been when he first entered nrc. how... had it gotten so bad overnight? sure, his darling hadn't fixed the whole place up, but they'd worked plenty- just last night when he dropped them off, the place looked liveable. now... well, it was rotting and falling appart
he can't find them. oh god, where are they? he feels like he could faint. in a moment of desperation, he asks rook to find them: surely a master hunter can find his darling! ... but rook blinks twice at his request, before asking who exactly this person is and why vil needs them.
vil cannot comprehend what happened. he makes sure rook isn't pulling his leg, then tries to see if someone else remembers. he'll desperately commission artists to draw his darling as well as he can remember and spread the art through his social media- has anyone seen the person in this painting?! anyone?!
his fans think he's pranking them or doing one of those creepy internet games that'd become popular lately. rook just thinks vil may be having hallucinations or misremembering things- maybe he should de-stress and calm down, before the whole dorm sees him lashing out?
vil won't accept it. he'll keep asking and searching- he'll he known as an eccentric beauty, insisting on finding a person who seems to never have existed
idia shroud
at first he thinks his darling left him quietly. they took all the trinkets they'd left at his dorm, packed their bags and left from nrc- that was what happened, right? but then... why does ortho not even know who he's talking about?
is ortho's memory malfunctioning? he panickedly runs a scan- no, it seems to he perfect... except all traces of his darling are gone. every maintenance check comes up perfect- no files were deleted recently. so then why...?
he's too scared to ask others, so he uses his tablet and ortho to ask around, and can't believe the results. nobody knew who his darling was? not even their own classmates...?
if this was a videogame this would be the worst plot ever. but it's even worse- it's all real, too real, and he's the only one who can remember. what now? how can he look for them? are they even alive?
he'll fall into such a deep depression, even his dormmates worry about him. sure, he'd holed up in his room before, but never so badly. even ortho feels like he can't get through to idia
why would this happen?! just when he finally got felt like he could open his heart to someone, to begin to leave his shell- suddenly the person who'd helped him grow as a person is gone? erased trom the world? he'll fall back on his old habits, even worse than before- he's trying to drown out his grief and missery, but he ends up just stewing in them
malleus draconia
lilia is seriously worried over him when he won't stop mentioning his darling, a person who as far as the smaller fae and everyone else knows, doesn't exist. malleus is distraught; where is the one person who didn't fear him? where did they go?
he feels utterly heartbroken. so nobody else remembers...? he has no doubts his memories are real: he'd know if someone tampered with him using magic. but... he also doesn't sense any magic being used on the people who cannot remember his darling
was it too good to be true? to have someone who not only didn't fear him, but loved him? did he upset destiny by finding a friend? was he fated to be alone forever- and had somehow made his darling dissapear by growing close to them?
he'll blame himself, bitterly and full of agony. he's incredibly powerful, but not even he could cast such a powerful spell as to makr everyone forget about a person, dissapear all their belongings, and undo any changes they might have done to the world around them. who could even do that?
it's his fault, isn't it? perhaps he should simply live his life as it seems it was meant to be: cold and alone. he'll grow apart from everyone, even lilia, silver and sebek- he feels like he finally understands. he's destined to be a lonely beast; there's no point in him even trying to live happily
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wennemein-siblings · 6 years
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To journey alone
The sun had begun to set as Grifter found a small hideaway on the eastern edge of Ascalon Settlement in the Gendarren Fields.  No humans would see him and no centaurs would either.  He was crafty that way, and he remembered the original path that had taken him here before some snake oil salesman capture him along with his sister.
Grifter had no hatred for the Wennemeins, he felt they had done what was in their hearts and for the brief time he was there in Fort Salma they never looked down on him once.  It made it easier for him to leave Mia there so she could grow up with a family.  Besides, he thought that if he made it to Diessa and the old ranch his parents ran he could come back for her.  At least, that was what he said in the note he had left.
The air was quiet as he started a small fire.  It was time to cook the small rabbit he’d captured late in the afternoon.  He’d learned how to skin and strip a rabbit the first time he’d travelled west, at least this time he wasn’t worrying about a fussy infant.  As he worked away, he felt as though he were being watched.  Carefully, he set down his cutting board and walked around the fire, stopping when he saw the silhouette of the familiar woman in her stetson, sitting quietly at the edge of the clearing.
“How long have you been there?” he said with a heavy sigh.  He’d hoped that none of the Wennemeins had followed him.
“I started followin’ ya a few hours after ya left,” Shani replied in her usual matter of fact tone.  “An’ don’t worry, it’s just me.”
“Why are you here?” Grifter asked as he returned to his cutting board.  “I mean, I’m going back to Diessa.  There’s nothing changing my mind.”
“Uh-huh,” Shani just said with a nod.  “Whatcha cookin’?”
“Rabbit,” Grifter said quietly.  “I caught one this afternoon.”
“Fair ‘nough,” Shani replied.  “Ya mind if I sit closer by the fire?  It can get cold at night.” Grifter nodded quietly and returned to cutting up the rabbit for his stew.  “This here’s a good spot,” Shani commented as she took a seat.  “Hidden from the Settlement, ain’t no centaurs thet come ‘round.  Should makr this fer future.”  Grifter only listened as he began putting chunks of meat and some vegetables into a stew pot.  “Ya left Mia back at the house, thet’s a good idea.  Best ta move on yer own.”
Grifter looked up from his stew pot and studied Shani’s face.  “Why are you here?”
“Make sure y’all get where ya need ta go?” Shani replied.
“I’ve done this before, you know,” he protested.
“Ya did this only b’cause it were outta need an’ desperation,” Shani said.  “Y’all were dealt a hand thet weren’t fer nothin’ an’ ya made it worth somethin’.  Along the way, ya had a coupla bumps, but ya made it.”
“You don’t make any sense sometimes,” Grifter said as he shook his head. “Are you gonna follow me all the way into Diessa?”
“If I need ta, yeah,” Shani nodded her head firmly.
“But...” Grifter began, unable to tell if Shani was being honest or merely saying something she felt Grifter might want to hear.  “But I know that humans and charr are at war.  They’d kill you on sight.”
“That is a possibility,” Shani said in her usual matter of fact way.  Grifter could only sit beside the fire and stir his cooking stew.  “What d’y’all expect ta find in Diessa?”  Grifter only shrugged in reply.  “I remember what ya told us thet night we got you an’ yer sister back ta the house.  How yer daddy told ya ta take Mia an’ head fer the hills.  Thet ya saw Flame Legion shamans an’ soldiers swarmin’ down onta the farm.”
“I...” Grifter began, but he suddenly couldn’t give a proper explanation.  He suddenly felt so alone, so cold and so afraid.  Try as he might, there was no way he could contain his emotions in front of Shani, and he began to cry as he spoke.  “I just miss them so much.  I want my dad and my mom again.  I want the ranch back.  That was my home and now it’s been taken away.”
Shani moved over to sit directly beside him.  She took a handkerchief from her coat and handed it to the young cub.  Grifter took it gingerly and sheepishly wiped his eyes and blew his nose.  “We all go through hurt in our lives.  But the hurt thet matters the most is the one ya go through right now.” Grifter blinked away his tears and looked up to Shani as she spoke.  “You an’ I have a lot in common.  We both have lost family in our time.  People like us gotta stick t’gether.  B’cause o’ that, I swear ta you thet I will go with ya ta Diessa an’ seek out yer momma an’ daddy’s ol’ ranch.  An’ I always keep my word.”
Grifter found himself leaning against Shani.  Flintlock was right, Shani wasn’t like other humans.  She didn’t look down on people when they needed help, and in a weird sort of way she was rather comforting.  “I guess...” Grifter said quietly before stopping to blow his nose.  “Maybe I could go back to Fort Salma with you and when it’s safer we could go out there together.”
“I will take thet as a deal,” Shani said and held out her hand to Grifter.  The cub looked to her hand, then up to Shani and finally took her hand in his small paw.  “B’sides, I think yer sister will be more comfortable with you around.  You were her protector for a good part o’ her life.  An’ goodness knows Flintlock will be tickled ta have ya around.  Someone she can wrastle with, hell she’ll be pleased as punch.” Shani smiled with this final comment, and Grifter couldn’t help but smile in return.
Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad, living in a human village.  Maybe he’d find the family that he’d needed after more than a year away from his first.
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pmscenarios · 6 years
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Notification - Sender unknown
I was sitting in the sofa, half-way watching the latest Jimquisition on the big screen, while checking up on the newest twitter controversy with my recently bought Lenovo Yoga 720 (got it half-price on the black Friday sale) when a notification popped up in the bottom right corner:
*plop*
I didn't murder anyone today
Heh, that's a pretty weird message to get out-of-context. I absentmindedly wondered who'd start a conversation with such an unique statement.
*plop*
gonna try harder next week
Okeey.. That was definitely a bit off. Which one of my friends could be messaging me about this, and why? Are they commenting on a video game? I moused down to open Discord when I realised it wasn't there.
Not that it wasn't open, there was no icon. I hadn't installed Discord on this pc yet.
So where was the messages coming from? I opened windows' action center, but the sidebar only displayed one sentence -
"no new notifications".
Maybe it's Skype? I didn't activate my Skype account, and I haven't used it in years, but it is a part of my windows id, and I had to log in when I set-up the Lenovo after all. I quickly opened the settings menu and uninstalled Skype. Can't stand that program anyway.
**
I didn't get any more notifications after that, so I assumed it had just been some random Skype spam. By the next week I'd almost forgotten it happened, only documented by my twitter feed - jokingly theorising I'd mistakenly intercepted a message from a serial killer.
Supergreatfriend was maneuvering in and out of some very selective elevators on the latest wild goose chase in Shenmue 2 when it popped up again.
killed my first one today, human
The same unknown sender, another ominous text. My nerves were instantly flaring, my hairs standing on end. This shouldn't be happening, I uninstalled Skype. I checked the Discord icon on my task bar, downloaded and installed during the last week. It was inactive. I started the app up to check, but there was no new notifications. I quickly clicked through my direct messages and then scrolled through the servers I followed. Nothing.
*plop*
he got up but I knocked him down with a rock
No. It has to be coming from somewhere. It must! I switched back to Chrome and quickly closed the Youtube tab. Maybe it had been a comment notification from that? Or maybe Twitter? Tumblr? I hastily closed every tab, and then Chrome for good measure. There was no more options. No more twisted, unknown messages.
*plop*
the fall didn't do it, but the spike did
Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit! It's not stopping, this is so freaky. I opened the start menu as fast as I could - shut down, shut down now!
Slamming the lid closed, I flung the netbook next to me in the sofa. Something had to be wrong with the win 10 install.
I should do a factory reset.
It's been 2 weeks since then. My twitter followers' suggestions ranged from a prank, faulty software, and just my own paranoia, to mistaken identity, refurbished pc still receiving spy messages or a malicious hack. I haven't really wanted to think about it. My Discord buddies suggested I report it to Microsoft, or maybe even the police, but what would I say? "I got these mysterious messages on my new laptop, without them having a sender or a connected program. No, I can't show them to you, they only appeared as live notifications."? They'll think I'm crazy.
I'm starting to think they would have a point. I've been really paranoid lately - seeing shadows were there are none - this weekend I was even convinced someone had broken into my apartment while I'd been out, just because I spent a few minutes searching for the new box of Nescafé medium roast capsules. Finding it, of all places, in the cup cupboard. I hadn't had a cup since. Heh. I shake my head at my own insanity. I really need a vacation.
*plop*
The small sound makes me almost jump out of my skin. The tell-tale soft sound of a windows notification, but it can't be! The Lenovo has been off since that day, secluded to a corner of the living room.
I glare at it there it sits, perched on the corner of the side table. The power button shining brightly, taunting me.
*plop*
Maybe if I just ignore it? Let it sit there on the side-table, plopping to itself until it runs out of power?
The coffee withdrawal is probably exhasperating my mental state.
I decide to make myself a cup of coffee and sit down with an episode of the Film Reroll. I'd found this podcast a few months back and was currently listening my way through their Wizard of Oz playthrough.
My Dolce Gusto coffee machine humms lowdly, slowly filling my cup with some medium roast black goodness. After about a minute, I pick up the freshly-made, piping hot cup of coffee and a nearby teaspoon, put in a few spoons of dairy-free creamer and a packet of sweetener, before stirring everything while heading for the couch.
I settle down in the sofa with my trusty Audio-Technica headphones and my old Sony Xperia tablet - which had ended up being used longer than planned with the recent events.
*plop*
The Lenovo was still asking for attention in the corner, but I block it out of my mind and focus my attention on the Podbean app, quickly starting up ep. 3.
As the group starts bantering about Gillikins and Gilligan's Island, I slowly start breathing normally again. I hadn't even realised I'd been holding my breath.
I give my cup a quick blow before sipping the newly-made coffee.
Sinking deep into the sofa I close my eyes and let the players transport me to their wonderous, weird world of Wizard of Oz, where Dorothy knows mind control and the Scarecrow does more to sabotage the group than help. *Du-du!* The Xperia notification sound deafens the podcast for a few seconds and shocks my eyes open. On the top of the screen is a new message:
I killed 5 yesterday, they cried a lot
I stare at the notification, not really taking in the words. It's like my whole world has frozen, time starting up as a crawl when the notification slowly withdraws. The podcast has just become meaningless noise, nothing reaching past my ears.
*du-du!*
I left the table for a minute and they tried to escape, so I caught the room on fire
This can't be real, this is a joke, a hoax from one of my twitter followers, or discord friends! I desperately run through all the options in my head, looking for an answer, any answer. The messages hadn't appeared on the tablet, only on the pc.
"You don't know that". A tiny little voice in the back of my mind whispered. "The tablet was in the bedroom while you were using your new computer, you saw the messages on the device you were using at that moment."
I desperately grab for the Len, the pc, to confirm to myself that it's a trick, that someone is messing with me, that it's not the same mystery messages I was getting before.
Pulling it open I place it on the sofa next to me and unlock it with my finger. I don't want to think about why it's on or how it's been able to keep a charge for over 2 weeks, I just need to check. To makre sure there's nothing there.
"no new notifications"
With a sharp breath of relief I feel like my terror recedes a bit. There's nothing there. Probably just someone remembering my recent freak-out and deciding to mess with me a bit. I take off the headphones and place them and the tablet on the table, before taking another sip of coffee.
"Heh!" I almost spook myself with my own snort, I'm really too paranoid. Somebody is probably sitting on the other side of the world congratluating themself for their little joke. I will have to thank them for the scare later.
*plop*
The tiny notification sound from the pc next to me is so loud I almost drop the cup, and I can see at the edge of my eye the tablet screen has also lit up with a new message.
fire and poison
"No.." My voice is barely a wisper and I can feel the tears welling up in my eyes. Why? Why is it there? There was nothing, no notifications, no.. i"that's what it said earlier too, when you checked after the first messages. There was never anything there."i/ I looked over at the tablet. windows might not keep the notices, but the tablet definately does! android doesn't hide thems until you clear them. I yank the tablet to me, causing the headphones to tumble onto the floor with a thud. Quickly swiping up, I pull down the notifications.
There's nothing there. No messages, no social media updates, nothing.
Gripping the tablet in my hands, my fear starts changing into rage. Fuck this whole thing, fuck this goddamn slimeball who's probably sitting behind a screen in a lowly lit place laughing to himself over his latest prank driving another completely insane.
Sending more and more bullshit messages.
What's the last one? "Fire and poison"? That doesn't even make any sense, it's just words..
"Yeah!" I shout out. "It's just fucking words on a, a screen! Whoever you are think you so clever for freaking me out like this, but I'm not scared anymore. You can't hurt me. You could never hurt me!
You, you're just, just words!
I can feel the stress letting go of my body, my mucles relaxing. The tablet slips out of my hands and falls on the headphones and floor.
"How do you feel now, huh?" I smirk, every word I speak into the empty room making my body go limp.
*plop*
I can barely turn my head to look at the pc beside me.
i am soo sleepy
Did Did it    No, it cant be. I try to reach out and grab the thing beside me, but my arms arent listening to me.
Its just a coinc  A co By chance. Friends. It never talked about things like that before. Just about.. Killing.
*plop*
I'd drink some coffee but I am immune
"ee-mmn-e?" My lips cant form my words. What a strange word to choos to talk cofeee. I get not effect from cofffee anymore, but immune? "- and poison" - it pop up in head like a bliking mesaage. Pull head around and stare half-had coffee. It not be+
try - stand, but body heavy. just sit.      Help
helo
her;[
trlkhdtmknlmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
after she found the corpse and the maggots got her
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min-gummy · 5 years
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I honestly don’t fucking know what to do anymore
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