#I’ve actually got colour down because if I post this without colour it is going to sit in wips for another 2 months and possible forever
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Trust the process trust the process trust the process
#hubris…#AKA I’m going to CRY. HOW do I do this#I’ve actually got colour down because if I post this without colour it is going to sit in wips for another 2 months and possible forever#speckled ramblings#unfinished art#WIP#progress tracking
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a touch of colour — eddie diaz.
writing masterlist | askbox
─── summary: eddie and chris' home is freakishly empty. you decide to redecorate a little.
─── pairing: eddie diaz x reader.
─── warnings & notes: fluffy fluff. no use of y/n, this was just supposed to be a short drabble but it ran aay from me and eddie might seem a little ooc but i don't even care it's so cute.
─── word count: 2.7k.
“BUCK, CAN I BORROW YOUR KEY to Eddie’s place, please?”
Your arrival at the station house isn’t preceded by any warning, and though it isn’t your intention to sneak up on Buck, he doesn’t seem to hear you coming. A panicked shriek tears itself from his throat as he drops what he’s holding, and the spray bottle full of cleaning fluid clatters to the floor at your feet.
An amused smile curls at your lips as he tries to play it off, ducking his head to hide the embarrassment blossoming in bright red spots across his cheeks.
“Uh, hey.” The words stumble out of Buck and he coughs, trying to recover what remains of his dignity. “You know, sneaking up on people isn’t good for your health. What if I’d panicked and thrown a punch or something?”
You quirk an eyebrow at him. “You did panic, Buck. Seems like it’s worse for your health than mine. Key, please?”
“Eddie’s just up in the loft, I can grab him if you want.”
It’s your turn to look a little sheepish. “Please don’t. It’s a surprise. Or it will be a surprise, if you let me borrow your key. I’ll return it tomorrow, I promise, and I’m not going to let a bunch of raccoons loose in there or anything━”
Buck blinks. The hint of a smile tugs at the corner of his mouth, just enough to let you know that he’s teasing. Mostly. “I wasn’t worried, but now I am.”
“I’m saving the raccoons for your apartment, actually,” you tell him, and now you’re not even really asking anymore, know that Buck will inevitably break because you’re Eddie’s girlfriend, and he actually likes you, and most importantly, his insatiable curiosity will not allow him to deny you. Hand outstretched, you wiggle your fingers expectantly. “Key, please.”
He huffs at you as if you’ve asked him to scale Mount Everest in nothing but swim trunks, rather than the perfectly reasonable request you’ve actually made, and makes a show of tugging the key to Eddie’s house off the keyring before passing it along to you.
“I have only one condition,” says Buck, a mischievous gleam in his eye as he presses the key into your palm.
You watch him warily. You’ve been dating Eddie, and subsequently been acquainted with Buck, long enough to recognise that look. “What?”
“Whatever you’re doing, make sure you film his reaction. I’ve got a funny feeling he’s gonna freak out.”
A nervous laugh bubbles in your throat, and you can’t help rolling your lips together as you pocket the key. It doesn’t take a genius to know that Eddie Diaz isn’t overly fond of surprises, but… fuck, you hope this one goes down well.
“I’ll keep you posted, Buck.” You offer him a two-fingered salute and turn on your heel, hurrying out of the firehouse before Eddie catches you sneaking around.
What he doesn’t know can’t hurt him, right?
Here’s the thing.
The first time Eddie invited you back to his place, you hadn’t really seen it. A euphoric haze had clouded all rational thought in your brain, because this brilliant guy you’d fallen head over heels for was so obviously guarded, and you’d been so happy the day he’d kissed you and invited you back to his place for coffee.
You’d been dating for three months by that point, and you’d wandered in and out of his house without really seeing anything except for him.
Meeting Christopher had gone much the same way. On the drive over you’d been rattling with nerves so much that you’d had to pull over on the freeway and shake out the cramp in your hand after white-knuckling the steering wheel. Your heart had thudded so hard in your chest that you worried Eddie would be able to hear it from the other side of the room.
There had been nothing to worry about, in the end, and almost a year on, you’re certain that neither of these boys can be pried out of the space they’ve created in your heart. Somehow, without really noticing, the pair of them have made a home there, built on a foundation of blood and muscle and all the love in your body.
You’re not sure your heart would know how to beat without them now.
And you love them, you love them, you love them both with everything you have…
… but this damn house is driving you insane.
There’s nothing wrong with it, in particular. It’s small and functional, perfect for the little family it shelters. Beige walls, basic furniture, sparse decorations that Eddie definitely had nothing to do with, and that’s sort of… it.
Now, you’re not an interior decorator, and you’d managed to miss it the first few times you visited, but now it’s like the blank walls are mocking you. Now you’ve seen it, you know, and the stark bleakness of this house has become a glaringly obvious problem that you’ve finally decided to tackle.
Unlocking the door with Buck’s key, you manage to nudge it open with your hip, hands and wrists weighed down with Target shopping bags that you dump on the floor the moment the door is closed. Tucking Buck’s key back into your pocket ━ Eddie gave you a key almost six months ago, but you’ve managed to lose four of them since, so it’s widely agreed that it’s best you borrow Eddie’s or Buck’s or Carla’s whenever you need to ━ you turn to the sparse open space of the kitchen/diner.
Hands settling on your hips, a slow breath escapes through your teeth as you survey the house. Christopher’s room is the only one with any personality, and you wouldn’t dare intrude on his privacy in that way anyway. Eddie’s room, similarly, feels off-limits.
But the rest of the house? Fair game.
When Eddie stumbles through the front door at the end of his shift, he doesn’t notice it right away. Not your bag hanging on a hook by the door, or your shoes tucked neatly against the wall. His head feels like it’s filled with cotton after a twelve-hour shift, and he’s simply grateful that Carla offered to drop Christopher off later, rather than have Eddie come pick him up after his shift.
He doesn’t notice you lingering in the kitchen with a bottle of beer in your hand until you clear your throat, and then he looks over, and a tired smile spreads over his face.
“That for me?” he asks, as hold out the beer bottle towards him, drops of condensation soaking your fingers.
“It’s definitely not for me.” You wrinkle your nose playfully as he accepts the drink, and you lean over the counter to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth. You hand over Buck’s key, and with it, all the anxiety you’ve felt since it first landed in your possession that morning. “Give this back to Buck for me? If I lose another one, I’ll never hear the end of it.”
Eddie chuckles and tucks the key into his pocket. “Buck didn’t mention you came by the firehouse.”
“I asked him not to.” Your voice wavers, just a little. The way you’re picking at a loose bit of skin near your thumb lets him know you’re nervous, and he reaches out with his free hand, curling rough fingers around your own. Unable to help yourself, a deluge of words start to babble out of you. “I did a thing. And I’m aware that you may not like the thing, and it almost certainly wasn’t my place which I’m realising now, but it seemed like a pretty harmless idea at the time?”
“Baby━”
“And if you hate it, I can take it all away! We can pretend I never did it, it’s just that your walls were driving me freaking insane, like which decorator decided that beige was a good base colour because I would like to have a word━”
“Hey!” A gentle squeeze of your hand grabs your attention, and when you look back at Eddie, the sight of him knocks the breath of you. You never knew eyes could be so big and brown and full of love, and even though there’s a little humour glinting in there at your expense, you still find it a little difficult to breathe.
Fuck, you love this man.
“What am I supposed to hate, exactly?” There’s a lilt of laughter in his voice, a gentle quirk to the corner of his mouth.
You want to kiss him until it blossoms into a full-blown grin. You hope you’re lucky enough to make this man laugh forever.
The look on his face helps to ease the tension in your shoulders. Slowly, you reach out and take the beer bottle from his grip, setting it on the counter. Instead, you replace it with your own hand, threading your fingers through his, a little chilly where the bottle pressed against his skin.
“Let me show you.”
Guiding him by the hand, you lead him through to the living room, and at first, he’s not sure what’s changed. There’s still the couch, and the TV, and the coffee table he knows you’ve always hated because it’s glass, and who has a glass coffee table, Eddie, you're a firefighter and this feels like a recipe for disaster!
(You’ve seen way too many movies where characters end up crashing through a glass coffee table but you still think it’s a valid point.)
And then he sees them.
He spots the first one next to the television; a picture of Chris from a few months ago, the first time all three of you went to the beach together. He’s grinning at the camera and there’s a dab of ice-cream on his nose from where you swiped him just a moment before. Eddie remembers taking this and sending it to you.
It wasn’t the first moment he realised he loved you, not by a long shot, but he hadn’t said it yet, and that day on the beach had cemented your place in his heart even further.
The picture is small, sitting in a quirky silver frame that you’ve glued a few seashells to.
The next two are over on the mantel. A photograph of the 118 in Bobby and Athena’s backyard last summer; Bobby’s frowning in the foreground, having been bullied into wearing a Kiss The Cook apron by Buck and Hen, while the rest of them are howling with laughter behind him. The other is a picture of Christopher and Shannon cuddled together beneath the Christmas tree.
Tucked between them, bizarrely, is a little wooden figurine of a runner duck wearing galoshes. This one, he knows, came from your personal collection.
Eddie’s heart stutters in his chest as he turns, finally, to the big thing. The wall behind the couch has always been depressingly bare, a dull expanse of beige paint that he’s always sworn he’d do something with, eventually.
Hell, the whole house is bare. And depressing. This, he’s ready to admit, even if the reason for it used to sting a little bit.
Before now, the only personal touches in his home belonged to Christopher. Report cards and drawings stuck to the fridge with kitschy magnets from tourist spots. An ever-changing pile of video games stacked on the floor next to the TV. A dinosaur-print throw that was dragged from Christopher’s bedroom on a lazy Sunday that hasn’t quite managed to migrate back there yet.
It was never that way on purpose. At first, he thinks, it was a reluctance to put down roots. Life was hectic enough, with his work schedule and Christopher switching schools. Before Carla, Eddie hardly had a moment to breathe, let alone think about decorating their home beyond the bare minimum required to get by.
And then, he thinks, it might have been guilt.
He doesn’t dare to dwell on that for too long. He feels your hand in his own, steady as a rock, and stares, glassy-eyed, at the wall you’ve managed to transform into something… something that feels like home.
A collage of wooden picture frames are scattered over the surface of the wall, in varying hues of warmth that contrast nicely with the beige that peeks through the cracks. A beige that, formerly, kind of made him want to scratch his eyes out. He hadn’t quite realised that until now.
Dozens of smiling faces peer down at him. A handful of memories he holds most dear, and each of them sends a flush of warmth through his chest.
There’s the day Chris was born, and he’s staring at this tiny baby in his arms as if he’s holding the sun and stars themselves. There’s Buck and Chris at the zoo, posing near the penguin exhibit. There’s Eddie, on the day he was certified as a full-fledged member of the LAFD, shaking Bobby’s hand. There’s even a picture where he’s fallen asleep on the couch, and his sisters are brandishing Sharpies like the little demons they are, drawing a moustache and beard that took days to properly fade away.
It’s such a little thing, really. They’re just pictures. But his throat feels tight and his eyes are wet and it doesn’t feel little to him. Not at all.
“You thought I’d hate this?” He’ll never admit that the words come out a little choked up.
You shrug. “You’re not a fan of surprises.”
“I might be now.”
And you both know it’s not true, that Eddie will never be that guy, but this is fine. This is perfect, and he’s damn sure it might be the nicest thing any girlfriend’s ever done for him.
He turns to you, a thousand more questions on the tip of his tongue, when he notices you’re holding your phone up with your free hand. A confused furrow appears between his brows.
“Buck,” you tell him, and it really doesn’t require further explanation, but still you add, “He thought you’d freak out. Asked for evidence.”
“Ah.” Eddie nods. You put your phone away as he winds his arms around your waist, pulling you close enough to kiss the tip of your nose. “I’m not freaking out.”
“I noticed.”
“Thank you,” he says, and kisses you again. This time his mouth slides against yours and lingers there for a few seconds, slow and gentle. “I can’t help but notice you’re not in any of the pictures.”
Your cheeks turn a rosy pink. “That would have been a little presumptuous of me, Mr. Diaz. And I was already hijacking your home for my own selfish agenda, so…”
“Wanna hijack it some more?”
The question slips out without any warning, and you blink up at your boyfriend in bewilderment. “Uh?”
Eddie smiles, wide and wonderful, and even though it’s not possible to fall more in love with him, you think you do.
“I talked to Chris about it a while ago,” he tells you, his thumb rubbing slow circles against your hip. “I was just waiting for the right time to ask you. And then you went all House Flipper anyway━”
“I did not go all House Flipper!”
“━ so it feels like the right time to ask.”
You watch him for a moment, all soft at the edges. “You want me to move in with you?”
“I think you’ve got a tartan throw that would look great in here,” he says teasingly, “and that little duck is part of a collection. He might get lonely.”
“He might,” you concede with a hum.
There is enough space on that mantel for the whole family.
You feel like there’s a tiny sun in your chest, like you might honest-to-God be glowing from the inside out right now, and when you pull Eddie down so you can kiss him again, you know without a doubt that the answer is yes.
There are a hundred things to figure out. You have a lease to get out of, and an apartment filled with enough clutter to furnish ten houses, and you’ve really got to figure out a solution for the key situation, because it’s getting ridiculous.
But in this moment, none of that matters. It’s you, and Eddie, and Chris, and a bare apartment suddenly filled with a lifetime of potential, and you just know everything is going to be fine.
And you hope, for a moment, that he’ll let you replace the couch next.
#eddie diaz x reader#eddie diaz fanfiction#eddie diaz imagine#9-1-1 fanfiction#9-1-1 imagine#9-1-1 fic#* chapter update.
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Short imagine + Headcanons for Schlatt :)
☆ Schlatt X Reader
☆ Headcanons
☆ Fluff/suggestive
☆ If you are going to request: please check at the pinned post if requests are open,otherwise I will delete your requests which I have already been doing
☆ Creds to @cafekitsune for dividers :)
Masterlist | Pinned post
☆ Schlatt is going to announce your relationship by posting a photo of you two cuddling (you cuddling him because he doesn’t want to seam “weak”) and saying something like “I’ve bagged a woman”
☆ Schlatt is honestly so sweet off camera,the different personas really making a switch. Like if you came onto his stream he would make constant jokes about you but if he’s not streaming let’s be honest,he cuddling up to your chest.
“Ignore that it was a moment of weakness chat.” He’d say if you came into stream
☆ “Guys I hate Valentine’s Day it’s all bullshit-“ Buys you roses,chocolate and a small necklace for you
☆ If you ever joined one of his streams and got hate in dms,twitter etc he would definitely post something on twitter like ; “I love my girl and if you don’t fuck off,fucking idiots hating on someone you don’t know,get a life.”
☆ “Schlatt come to bed it’s late” You know what he would do? Mock the shit out of you before coming to bed to cuddle with his little girl ; “Awh does baby want some hugs?” || “Awh can you not sleep without me?”
☆ Honestly I feel like he wouldn’t actually go too far with his jokes, he knows the limits and boundaries of what he can say/joke about and wouldn’t cross them to save himself.
☆ Honestly a sweetheart but tell him that and he’s immediately a tough guy ;
*You and schlatt laying in bed together with schlatt on your chest*
“You’re such a pretty boy.”
“Don’t push it.”
☆ And adding to that,he secretly loves every nickname you have for him because he knows that it’s special to him and you don’t share that nickname with anyone else.
☆ The dominant one in the relationship,massively,not just in bed but all around the house he’s a very masculine presence. Need help with something? He’s on it immediately. Need help getting off?he’s going down.
☆ Will constantly let you have your way with his hair,though he would sit there and complain in actuality he has all the time in the world for you and so if you want to fiddle with his hair,put it in small pony tails etc. go ahead.
☆ If you needed it he would definitely help you with more feminine typical things such as hair,makeup and nails. (Disclaimer: I’m not saying these are feminine things I’m just saying it’s feminine typical!)
☆ If you are on your period he’s immediately by your side. “What do you want? Chocolate,hot water bottle?” || “I heard that *insert thing* helps”.
☆ He’s not letting anyone talk to you the way he talks to you,at all. If someone calls you a nickname he uses he’s making his presence known in the most intimidating way. Jealousy.
☆ He has the best music taste,long road trip? Turn that shit up !! Definitely the type of person to listen to any genre of music,as long as he likes the tune,he doesn’t care.
☆ Would help you with stream/youtube set ups. Would buy you lights/leds/cute little toys he’s found etc. Just to add a bit of himself to your set up.
“Babe I got you some more Leds for your room!”
“Awh you didn’t have to,thank you.”
☆ Would definitely brag about you to his friends. Ted has heard every single positive description of you along with multiple pictures of you whilst he brags about how pretty you are.
☆ Would absolutely spoil you. You know when you mentioned 3 months ago that you wanted a new pair of converse in that new colour you saw? They’re now at your door
“Jay you have to stop buying me things!”
“You’re my girlfriend,I’ll do whatever I want.”
☆ Would definitely call it weakness whenever he showed affection on stream. He would joke about it enough on stream but the moment he’s off camera he’s showering you with affection and praise.
“Chat you didn’t see that,that was weakness.”
☆ “Schlatt + His girlfriend,cute moments!” They come up more regularly on your YouTube feed than Schlatt himself.
☆ He isn’t a huge fan of PDA but he will wrap a light hand around your waist,kiss your forehead etc. he wouldn’t do any big gestures in public.
#spotify#smut#song#romance#cute#fluff#schlatt x reader#schlatt#jschlatt smut#jschlatt x reader#jschlatt
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝒩𝒮𝐹𝒲 𝒜𝐿𝒫𝐻𝒜𝐵𝐸𝒯 — j.slaughter
warnings + tags — MINORS / AGELESS BLOGS DNI, female reader, mentions of sex, dacryphilia, blood kink, non-con kink, knife play, johnny slaughter being johnny slaughter, typical nsfw things
authors notes — I’ve been wanting to do an alphabet for some of the tcm characters forever, so why not kick it off with a dirty little johnny post? this is all for fun and games, so if you don’t agree w anything, that’s okay <3 I might make some more n/sfw alphabets if people want, too (also let’s pretend I’m not uploading this at 6am).
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
at first he wasn’t exactly understanding of aftercare, he was used to just fucking and leaving, you know, the whole family business. but once he got with you, you taught him what aftercare actually was and it became one of him favourite things — he’d actually look forward to it, not that he’d tell you that. the idea of holding you close to him, all sweaty and panting, both of you more relaxed than you ever could be, enjoying the silence and the come down from your shared high. what could be better?
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
his favourite body part of yours is definitely your ass and thighs, doesn’t matter whether they’re big or small, he just loves the soft parts of your body. he loves squeezing them, slapping them, biting them, laying on them — whatever, he is just borderline obsessed with them. but in all honesty, every single part of your body is his favourite, he’s just so into you that he can barely contain himself.
his favourite part of himself is his arms and hands, his muscular biceps and large hands make him feel manly and give him extra confidence, plus when he’s choking someone, seeing his hands or arms cover them completely kinda gets him going. plus he knows how much you love those parts of him, and that makes him like himself just that little bit more.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
he’s filthy when it comes to his cum, he’ll have it everywhere — he’ll cum on your face, your ass, in your mouth, and even forcing it into your cunt and breeding you like you deserve. he claims you as his and him having his cum in you or all over you just cements that fact. it tastes a little salty but mostly just normal, he likes to think he has a “good” diet just for your taste.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
johnny is a dirty little panty stealer, especially dirty panties. any time you’re showering or have gotten changed, he’ll pick up a pretty pair and shove it into his pocket, and he’ll act completely innocent when you ask if he’s seen them anywhere — he’ll just claim he probably ripped them to shreds when he fucked you, or threw them behind something accidentally. he loves smelling them while he’s masturbating (which isn’t often) but when he really misses you, then it just brings him that much closer to you. he has a secret little stash of them in his shack, tucked away in the back of a drawer, all different colours and styles just for his pleasure.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
no surprise but he is pretty damn experienced, but in the beginning he only really fucked for his own pleasure, not really caring about the other person. but when he got you, then all he wanted was to hear you moaning, to hear his name tumbling from your pretty lips. so he focused on and used everything he knew best, and of course he listened and learnt what you enjoyed — he basically became a god of fucking you, knowing everything that made you break, the things that made you quiver and come without him barely touching you.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
surprisingly, missionary is his favourite, mostly because he likes seeing your face while he’s fucking you, having his hands wrapped around your throat or pinning your hands above your head. there’s something intimate about the simplicity of missionary and he loves that. but he enjoys mixing it up a little, missionary that turns into a mating press, and whatnot.
his second favorite is doggy, but because he loves ass, and it makes it easy to wrap his arm around your neck and pull you back into his chest. a secret favourite as well is forcing you into the full nelson, because what wouldn’t be enjoyable about that?
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
he’s more serious but it’s because he gets lost in the moment, he’s so concentrated on making you come that he doesn’t really take the moment to be more relaxed. but it doesn’t mean he doesn’t know how to laugh and joke on during it, he’ll often say things that makes you chuckle, especially when he’s being “sweet” — but he doesn’t make a habit to go out of his way to make a joke unless it’s to lighten the mood after an intense session.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
johnny is pretty well groomed, he often shaves his armpits and trims his pubes, mostly because of the hot weather so he likes to keep it shorter but also because he feels more comfortable. he definitely leaves hair down there though, and grows out his happy trail because he knows he looks good with it. and of course he leaves the little bit of chest hair he has. all of his hair is jet black, and pretty thick and straight.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
he can sometimes be nice and loving, slow and romantic. whispering sweet nothings into your ear, pumping in and out of you deeply, just showing how he loves you. but of course he has the moments, which is more likely, where he fucks you hard and rough, using you for his own pleasures. it all depends on the moment, the day, and his mood, but expect a bit of everything from him. but johnny has his own ways of intimacy, his own way of showing his love and being what he thinks is romantic, even if he is being rough the entire time.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
he rarely jacks off, instead he prefers having sex with you to relieve himself, but on the off times he does need to jack off, then he has specific things he’ll do. like stated he’ll sniff your panties or look at polaroids of naked pictures you took for him, picturing you riding him and moaning for him. he’ll edge himself a lot, too, your name always rolling off his tongue when he moves his hand nice and slow up and down his cock. other times he wants it over quickly, locking himself in the bathroom and fucking his hand hard and fast, just needing to come and get it over with so he can get back to his busy schedule.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
blood kink — need I say more? he loves eating and tasting people, and your blood is something that he loves tasting, especially when he’s balls deep inside of you. there’s something so intimate about licking the blood trickling down your neck and making love to you at the same time, something so intimate about sharing something like blood with each other. he also loves having you taste his, whether it’s from biting his lip or even just licking his wound when he accidentally cuts himself.
knife kink — again, a pretty obvious one, the man who walks around with a knife and cuts people up basically for a living? he likes the way you flinch under the cool steel of his blade, cutting your clothes off your body with it, leaving lines and marks on you. he’ll cut you if you let him, not deep enough to scar, but enough to get a little blood from you, two kinks for the price of one.
non-con kink — he loves having his way with you, especially when you’re begging him to stop or when you’re whimpering and crying. of course he doesn’t hurt you, instead he pleasures until you can’t take it anymore, until you want it to stop but he just won’t. sometimes he’ll grab you from behind when you least expect it, blindfold and gag you, tie you up and fuck you senseless.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
he’s a simple man with simple pleasures, taking you on a bed or the sofa in his shack is good enough for him, anything with soft padding for him and you to be comfortable. but sometimes he likes to mix it up, fucking you in a victims car or bending you over a table in his mothers house and having his way with you. it depends on his mood like usual, it doesn’t matter where it is as long as he gets to cum in you — but he does have a preference for the risky areas, the outdoor places where you have the chance to be caught, or even just places where he didn’t bother locking the door.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
he’s a pretty simple man so a lot of things you do turn him on, it can be as simple as seeing you all warm and bothered on a hot summers day or seeing you bend over picking something up off the floor. but some other things are a little meaner, like seeing you cry when you’re upset or when you’re annoyed with him and you pout all cute like. his favourite thing though, is when you’re angry or really upset, shouting at him, pushing him away or pounding on his chest to get him away — that instantly sends the blood to his cock.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
there isn’t much he wouldn’t do, or at least there isn’t really any hard no’s. but he isn’t a fan of threesomes, he doesn’t like the idea of anyone else touching you, pleasing you — he knows he’s enough for you and you’re enough for him, so why would you want to invite someone else into the bedroom? as for turn offs, there isn’t really many, something might turn his off once because of his mood or just how he’s feeling on that day but then it might not the next time.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
just like most people, he loves recieving and seeing you on your knees, especially when you’re choking and gagging on him. but he absolutely loves going down on you, he loves to pleasure you and anything that gets you moaning his name, he loves. he’s really good at it too, he was already good before he met you but he’s learnt exactly what gets you going, and god knows he can work miracles with that tongue of his. there are times he’ll go down on you for the sake of it, not even expecting it to be foreplay for sex. he’ll just push you up against something and drop to his knees, pushing your panties to the side and eating you out, then he’ll just go about the rest of his day like normal after making you come on his face.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
he goes between fast and rough and slow and sensual, but most of the time he likes it fast and rough. throwing you about and using you as a glorified fleshlight and making you come at his will is just too much to pass up. when he’s been more romantic or sensual, he likes to have you in missionary, his head buried in the crook of your neck where his moans and sighs are slightly muffled, and he can just push his cock into you nice and slowly.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
as much as he loves taking his time with you, he loves a good old fashioned quickie, bending you over some car or throwing you up against a wall when he needs to relieve himself. he’s worse with it when he’s had a bad day and something has annoyed him, he’ll practically hunt you down just to fuck you. he doesn’t have quickies every day, but it’ll be at least one or twice every couple of days.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
johnny is completely down for taking risks, fucking you in easily caught places and places that are pretty dangerous — the most noticeable place being near his mothers house, or even inside, he’ll drag you off somewhere when you’re visiting her and have his way with you then act like nothing happened when you can barely walk. he loves to experiment with you, too, after all he has some pretty out there kinks that you didn’t exactly like or ever think about trying, but he respects if you have hard no’s — he’s a lot more caring than he pretends to be.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
not so surprisingly, he has a lot of stamina, and can go a whole bunch of rounds, but usually he’ll tap out after two, or a very long session. he enjoys having multiple sessions throughout the day rather than all at once, because then he can burn off all that energy and anger he gets during the day. during a usual session, foreplay included, it’ll last around 45 minutes to an hour — after all, he really loves taking his time with you.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
so he’s pretty hit and miss with toys, he didn’t exactly like them at first. he was kinda insulted when you brought up the idea of having a vibrator / when he found yours, because he took it that he wasn’t good enough for you and that you clearly needed to have something else make you come. after you finally convinced him to just use it on you during sex, his entire world lit up. watching how easy it was to have you a quivering, blubbering, sniveling mess sent blood rushing straight to his cock — and now a lot of the time, especially during longer sessions, he’ll use it on you to tease or give his hand a little bit of a break if he needs it. he also loves making you use it on yourself while he watches, sometimes wanking himself off while you make yourself come.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
he’s a huuuuge tease, loves to edge you for as long as he can, it’s even better if he gets you to the edge of coming on a morning then he can leave for the day — but he tells you not to touch yourself, because he’ll know — sometimes he’ll even “check” during the day to make sure you haven’t made yourself come. if you’ve been good for him then he won’t tease you for too long, but it’s rare he goes a day without teasing you just a little bit. he just loves hearing you whimper and beg for him, and he gets off on being the only one that can make you come.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
johnny grunts and cusses a lot during sex, or even when you’re just teasing / going down on him. he has no issue being vocal anymore, although he was a lot quieter when you first got together. now he’s completely fine with moaning into your ear, and he actually loves moaning your name, he doesn’t even care who hears — he likes you knowing how good you make him feel, plus he knows how much it turns you on having him moaning and cussing when he’s deep inside you.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
okay I’ve said it a million times, and I’ll say it a million more, he’s actually really sweet to you, and treats you like an angel. at first he’d be a little mean, still saying things that would hurt your feelings or just scaring you by him being him — but once you’d been dating awhile, he’s the “hurt them and I kill you” type guy, the one that’ll kill for you, the one that’ll die for you. he’s so wrapped around your little finger it’s almost unbelievable, he’s so in love that he’d do nearly anything you ask — but he’s only like that when you’re alone, for the most part. when you’re around other people he’s super possessive and lets others know who you belong to, always having a hand around your waist or yanking you into the most sexually fuelled kiss when someone talks to you for too long. nonetheless, he’d protect you with his life and is actually really sweet, in his own way, of course.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
okay he’s got a pretty huge dick, it’s 7”-7.5”, and it’s girthy as all hell, to the point he needs to warm you up a lot before even thinking about trying to push himself into you. he’s not cut, and he’s got a big fat vein that runs along the underside of his cock and it’s super sensitive around there, too. the closer to the tip of his cock, the more reddish purple it turns, especially when he’s hard. oh and let’s not forget, he’s got big, heavy balls as well.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
he’s ridiculously horny, that man has a crazy sex drive and it was kinda hard to keep up with at first. he has a naturally high one anyway but it’s made worse by his obsession with you — he needs to be in you constantly, filling you, making you his. as soon as he wakes up he’s there being needy, he’s the exact same at night when you’re going to bed. and don’t be surprised if he doesn’t pull you round the back of a shack to fuck you during the day, too.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
johnny falls asleep instantly, there’s not a single thought behind that man’s eyes. and it’s made even worse when he tires himself out fucking you senseless a good few rounds before finishing — he’s the type that as soon as his head hits the pillow, he’s passed out snoring, mouth open, twitching and kicking you all night. or sometimes he’s just so still that you’re not sure he’s alive anymore, just perfectly motionless, couldn’t even be woken up by the end of the world.
#ꕤ 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘶𝘮 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵𝘴 ⌨️#tcm#johnny slaughter x female reader#johnny slaughter x reader#tcm the game#johnny slaughter#tcm x reader#texas chainsaw game#texas chainsaw massacre
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I absolutely love how you write jongho but I'm a few years older than him- is there in any way that you write him with a noona reader (someone who is older/respectful) doesn't have to be smutty I just need him to be flabbergasted by a lady
- raccoon anon
just kiss me already
idol!jongho x fem!reader
warnings: kinda smutty (?), suggestive, make out session
a/n - omg thank you so so much!! i don’t even do this properly, like i’m not a writer or anything i just started to post my thoughts when i was drunk one night lmao! so knowing that people are actually liking what i write is amazing 🥹 this is also my first ever request so it probably won’t be great but i will try my best for you! ❤️
there you were, at the concert you’ve been dreaming of attending for years. you finally get to see your favourite group, which also means you get to see your favourite person, jongho, for the first time too. you managed to get a front row ticket and although you didn’t think you’d get any interactions with ateez you still outdid yourself with your outfit - all black, sophisticated and sexy.
halfway through the concert jongho comes over to your side of the stage. he scans the front row and his eyes finally land on you, the moment you wanted so bad to happen. inside you were dying of excitement but you kept yourself composed and gave him the biggest smile. he smiled back and gave you a quick wink before he ran back to the group to start the choreo for the next song. your heart skipped a beat and you felt the heat rising in your cheeks.
jongho kept glancing over to you for the rest of the concert until they finished the last song, left the stage, and the lights turned back on in the arena. everyone around you was still losing their minds and you just sat there with a big smile on your face in disbelief with the attention you got from jongho.
as everyone was filtering out of the arena you started to get up to go too when a member of staff tapped you on the arm. you looked at them and they said to follow them. you were instantly scared, thinking you had done something wrong. they took you through a couple hallways backstage and then to a door. the member of staff said to go in. so you did just that, not knowing what you were getting yourself into.
as you stepped into the room, your eyes immediately met jongho’s. he got up from the sofa he was seated on and greeted you with a huge gummy smile. “oh my god… is this real?” you ask. he giggles and replies “yes, it is! i actually asked our manager to bring you backstage. i hope that’s okay with you?” “of course it’s okay!!” he giggled again in response. “you really caught my eye in the crowd for some reason, maybe it was because you were so calm and composed, you really stood out from the rest.” he explains. “well, if i had seen you when i was a teenager things would’ve been different, i would’ve been screaming your ears off.” you both laugh, “…but now that i’m in my late 20’s i’ve been enjoying concerts more when i’m relaxed and able to take everything in without just losing my mind”. you both laugh with each other again.
after talking for a little while, you notice that you’re both sitting a lot closer than you were before. you both look at each other, no words spoken… until, “you’re so hot” you accidentally blurt out. jongho then breaks eye contact, looking down at his fidgeting hands and giggling like a teenager with a crush, a rosy red colour creeping up into his cheeks. “please don’t tell me that i’m making THE choi jongho blush right now?!” you say to him. he looks back up at you and says, “is it bad if you are?” “not at all, i just didn’t know i had it in me to get you in this state” you reply.
a few minutes later, you notice him looking down to your lips every so often as you carry on the conversation. you wonder whether you should make a move, or even if he’s thinking about you in that way, but then you think of how he literally got his manager to pick you out of the crowd and bring you backstage for him. it’s not just a chat he wants right? he looks at your lips once again, so you say “with the way you keep looking at my lips it makes it look like you wanna kiss me”. “what if i do?” jongho replies quicker than you could process what he just said.
you suddenly put your arms around his neck and begin to kiss him. he leans into the kiss, putting his hands on your waist. you move closer, not breaking the kiss at all, and end up straddling his lap. you hear him softly moan into the kiss, still not believing you have this effect on him. you pull away, both of you panting for air. he bites his lip, moving his hands to your hips. he pushes you down into his lap, making you aware of what you’re *really* doing to him. you gasp and smirk, leaning in for another deep kiss.
just as both of your hands start roaming around each other’s bodies there’s a loud knocking on the door. “it’s almost time to go back to the hotel, jongho” a voice says. he looks at you and asks, “wanna come back to my hotel room to finish what we started, beautiful?” “fuck yes” you say, making both of you giggle.
let’s just say that it was a long night for you both. and enjoyable one at that.
#ateez#atiny#choi jongho#jongho#ateez smut#jongho smut#ateez imagines#jongho imagines#choi jongho smut#atz smut#jongho x reader
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[TL] BIOHAZARD/Chapter 10
[ This post uses Ois~su ♪ ]
Kaoru: So to sum up, everything’s Sakuma-san’s fault.
Rei: Eh~? Yupyup, everything’s lil’ ol’ me’s fault~♪
Rei: My attitude was so bad!?
Koga: Even now I get fooled by the old man shit you do, but your manners 'n attitude are still bad sometimes.
Puttin’ yer feet up on desks, takin’ life easy.
Rei: Ritsu also does that. Isn’t that nice, brothers having the same habits ♪ We’re such good friends ♪ Doesn’t that make for a heartwarming story?
Koga: True. Ricchii sometimes kicks me ‘n goes ‘move out the way’.
Rei: I suppose since we are rather high ranking amongst our relatives, there is no-one to scold us for such rude behaviour.
Koga: Hmph. You're way too soft on him. You’re suppose t’be his older brother yet you can’t even tell him off.
Adonis: Shh. There’s something that seems interesting is about to happen.
Kaoru: After that Deadmanz live the other day, Sakuma-san fled overseas without even saying a word to anyone—
Rei: When work calls. I’d rather focus on doin’ stuff overseas.
Kaoru: That’s all good and all but you left all your devotees here and they started acting out.
Keito: Devotees?
Koga: W-What you lookin’ at me for?
Kaoru: Ahaha. At the live, Sakuma-san brought all of his delinquent friends with him.
Rei: Ah right. Well, that’s just how things go. So, what’s the problem?
Kaoru: The problem is, there seems to have been a bit of a misunderstanding.
They all think they're friends with superstar Sakuma Rei who’s recognised globally.
Rei: Uhuh–
Kaoru: And those who got too invested in the whole thing started calling themselves ‘vampires’. They keep ordering food and leaving without paying, and generally being nuisances.
Saying things like “We’re the disciples of Sakuma Rei, we’re so cool! Let’s not hold back!”
I just wanna know– are you making them do all of this, Sakuma-san?
The ones that call themselves ‘vampires’ say “if you’ve got a complaint, tell it to our boss Sakuma Rei!”
Rei: Are you stupid? What do I gain by makin’ them do shit like that? They’re just morons who’ve got the wrong idea ‘n are doin’ whatever they want.
They’re attention whores tryna ride on my coattails…Haa, this whole thing is weirder than I thought it was.
Kaoru: I thought as much. Those guys are just like vampires; they gather other delinquents and introduce them into the group. It’s pretty obvious.
Based on the size and their vibes, they’re like those groups of hooligans who all wore the same colours.[1]
If people are eating without paying, and hanging around the front of the store acting violently, it’s bad for business. We’re already going through a recession, we don’t need anything else adding to it.
I get it. It’s the whole “it’s your own responsibility” thing, right?
You cause them all to do this, so you should be the one to do something about it, right? Just to be safe, I’ve spoken to some nearby shops and prepared a reward.
By the way. I’m the one telling you this because we go to the same school, but I’d like to think other people around this place agree with me.
Of course, if push comes to shove, I’ll call the police. A lot of the parents of kids that go to Yumenosaki are influential people—
–so I don’t know if the police will actually do anything.
I’d prefer it if you guys could sort it out for me.
Could you ‘exterminate’ those ‘vampires’ for me? ♪
Rei: Ahaha. Might jus’ be a coincidence, but I never thought I’d be out here actin’ like Van Helsing.
Keito: If anything, you’re more like Count Dracula.
Rei: …Welp, I get what you mean. I thought that's how it would go down so I’ve been a bit proactive.
Look. Poor thing, to be left alone like this, but here's the guy behind it all.
Adonis: ...
Keito: That doesn’t make sense. What do you mean it was Otogari?
Rei: This guy’s the boss of the ‘vampires’.
To make a Count Draculua reference, you use a wooden stake to the heart to stop him movin’, ‘n cut his head off t’kill ‘im.
And it’ll be this guy’s head we’ll be cuttin’.
So basically, if we deal with him, everythin’ will be right as rain. Simple, ain’t it ♪
Adonis: ...
[ ☆ ]
he says カラーギャング or ‘color gang’, which were groups of hoodlums whose members all wear clothes in the same colour. Its associated with Ikebukuro in the late 1990s
Chapter 9
Chapter 11
#ensemble stars#enstars#translation#kaoru hakaze#koga oogami#rei sakuma#adonis otogari#keito hasumi#undead climax#biohazard
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Overanalysing Mela's Ace
Last night I wound up thinking about Mela’s rematch team, and specifically her ace, Armarouge. Overanalysing has let me gain a deeper appreciation of her character, and I wanna ramble about it here a little.
In the Starfall Street story, Mela is visited by a Charcadet nicknamed Charlos who she used to play with at the academy. She was close enough with him that, a year and a half later, she still recognises him and can tell what he’s thinking just by watching his flame. Mela also trains other Charcadet, and we know she evolved multiple to power the Starmobiles.
It’s safe to say that Mela has an affinity with the Charcadet line, or at the very least, the game draws a connection between her and the line more than it does with most other trainers and specific Pokémon.
Yet, despite this, Mela’s initial team only consists of Torkoal and her Starmobile. There’s a strange absence of Charcadet for someone who is largely characterised as ‘angry Charcadet girl’. But it’s actually really clear as to why when you look at her rematch team.
Mela’s ace is an Armarouge. This, on its own, doesn’t sound very notable. It’s a fire-type, a gen 9 Pokémon (every Team Star boss bar Penny has a new Pokémon as their ace), fits her colour scheme… No problem. But what makes this interesting is that her ace is not a Pokémon she had on her team previously.
In every other rematch, the boss’ ace is a Pokémon (or evolved form) that they used during the story. Even Giacomo, who, like Mela, only has one regular Pokémon on his initial team - Pawniard - evolves it and has Kingambit as his ace. (Side note - it has Defiant, not Supreme Overlord, which is really funny to me. As though they purposefully nerfed him because he’d always send it out last. The reverse Geeta.)
Anyway, that implies their aces are all Pokémon they’ve known for a long time, and love and trust most of any of their team. It would imply Mela knew her Armarouge longer than other new additions to her team, despite not having a Charcadet on her initial team…
Her Armarouge is Charlos. And it’s all but intentional, too. Why else wouldn’t she have a Charcadet in her first battle, if not solely to show us the Armarouge she eventually uses is not some random Pokémon she already owned, but the very one who tracked her down because it was worried about her? Mela went back to school, reunited with Charlos, and added him to her team. It’s adorable.
Now, I’m sure some people are reading this and thinking, well, yeah, that’s obvious. Which is fair enough. But I’ve got a little more to say. Because Charlos is a Charcadet in the story, and Charcadet has two evolutions. It’s a split evolution depending on whether you use the Malicious (intending or intended to do harm) or Auspicious (conducive to success) Armor.
Ceruledge’s Violet entry: An old set of armor steeped in grudges caused this Pokémon’s evolution. Ceruledge cuts its enemies to pieces without mercy.
Armarouge’s Scarlet entry: Armarouge evolved through the use of a set of armor that belonged to a distinguished warrior. This Pokémon is incredibly loyal.
Mela uses an Armarouge in both versions, despite no major character using a Ceruledge on their team. Which makes me ask, why? Why not change based on the version, or have both on her team, if she’s so heavily associated with the Charcadet line?
Well, if Charcadet evolve based on the emotions imbued into the items you use…
Mela has an Armarouge, not a Ceruledge, because post-game, she’s grown and changed. Her anger and attitude were a defence mechanism against the bullying she faced, but she’s in a better position now. She’s letting go of old grudges and resentment that define Ceruledge and instead embracing being a strong trainer and loyal friend.
As a character so closely linked with the Charcadet line, the traits of both evolutions have strong parallels with Mela - until the post-game, where she only has an Armarouge, because she’s in a better place, and she’s healing.
Or maybe a Gamefreak employee just thought the colour palette suited her better. Who knows.
#pokemon#pokemon scarvio#pokemon scarlet and violet#team star#mela#charcadet#armarouge#analysis#i love overanalysing fictional characters
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LU Character Design Analysis 6
In case you haven’t seen the previous posts yet, I’m doing this thing where I’m analysing and subsequently ranking all the designs of the chain in LU. I was going to do it 2 at a time, but I’ve got so much to say that I’m doing it one a time.
All the designs are really good, it was hard to come up with a decent ranking system that I was happy with and even harder to apply it. The numbers I scored them are subjective and any one of them can be debated.
And now we have...
4th place: Twilight
He’s my favourite so it breaks my heart that he’s not in the top three but it had to be done. I might have let this bias lead me to placing him ahead of Time and Warriors. Eh, this is my list and I wanna praise wolf boi’s design.
Pros: It sounds shallow but I’m glad his hair isn’t brown and more of a dirty blond or almost caramel coloured. It also complements the chainmail.
The colour palette of his outfit is dark and muted, save for the waist situation, which is a fun nod to the art style of Twilight Princess. The dark tunic is a lovely forest green which stands out against the rich gold chainmail, it looks heroic and like he'd be able to blend into any sort of green scenery. I love the little embroidery details too and the ones decorating his boots. The ones on his tunic are much subtler than Sky's and I feel like either he did them himself (adding to the pictures over time) or Ilia got a hold of it and did them herself. The ones on his boots are amazing too and I feel like they'd be a point of pride for him. I can see his boots being a clothing item he cares about a lot.
Twilight like Sky unfortunately suffers from "blankie around the tunic" syndrome, however it's less egregious in his case. One, because it's held by a sash which unlike smooth leather would be less likely to slip down with movement and two, because it looks messier- which is a little more realistic and gives me the impression he has to adjust it whenever coming out of wolf form. I’d prefer if it stayed as part of his civilian clothes, but it does add a nice pop of bright colour. So, I’m not that mad.
Twilight's light blue waist cloth stands out so much that it's easy to miss the discoloured and patched up left sleeve. It actually took me a while before I noticed it. It's a darker green than the rest of the tunic and looks like it had been hastily stitched on, which is a nice reference to his Ordon clothes (the funny looking belted sleeve) and the fact that his arm gets chopped off in the manga. Maybe at some point the original sleeve was torn off in battle and Twilight had to mend it while on the road, hence why it looks so scruffy.
I didn't like Sky's tunic slits because they made the tunic material look delicate and seemed more ceremonial than practical, but they work in Twilight's case because they feel accidental. They give off the impression that they occurred during the heat of battle or during an adventure. Like the patched sleeve also shows, the tunic was worn and torn with extended use and Twilight had to mend it alone and on the go.
It has a sort of rustic homespun appearance which fits his character as a down to earth farmer from a small village.
It’s a brilliant idea to leave the only reference to the Twilight Realm be in the form of the shadow crystal. After all, not only was all that supposed to stay secret, but also Midna left without saying anything, so there’s no way he would have anything else to remember her by. As shown by his less than polished tunic, he’s not very good at making clothes, although he’s good at embroidery. That being said a twili cloak does sound kinda dope and I don’t like that the crystal is out in the open as a necklace- it’s a huge risk for such a cautious guy to take. As a guy who isn’t very open he’d surely hide it in a pouch rather than risk being asked about it, or worse having a member of the chain try to touch it.
He's the only one of the older members wearing a leather arm guard (on his non shielding arm so it doesn’t get in the way of the straps, very nice), which made me realise that he's probably not a fan of wearing plated armour. He could if he wanted to, he clearly has the strength and endurance to run around for hours in armour. Then again that extra weight would be hard on Epona since he rides her a lot. I headcanon that he just barely tolerates the chainmail because it’s for his own safety, but rips it off at the first opportunity once camp has been set up.
Cons: Twilight's fur pelt is another one of those things where it looks cool and is a nice visual hint at his hidden power to turn into a wolf (I especially like how it forms tail at the end, it's goofy but a cool detail), but it raises some seriously questionable things about his character.
Best case scenario it was a gift, maybe from Ashei who also wears fur, he then wore it to be polite but overtime it became part of his usual travelling clothes. But even still, he's the type who'd rather fish or forage than hunt and he can talk to animals...yet he wears the pelt of an innocent deceased animal. Worst case scenario he got it himself, and even if he had to fend off a wolf to save someone I don't even want to imagine him making it. Either way it doesn’t make sense.
Plus the way it’s tucked in at his waist looks like it would be a hassle to put on. To make it more visible it’s not tucked into the light blue material only the orange sash. Looks pretty but not very practical.
Wishlist: Regarding the chainmail, I’m conflicted (I...can never seem to make up my mind). The gold chainmail is unique and a nice reference to the golden sky seen during twilight, a time of day he’s grown to appreciate. It also fits well with his pale complexion, But like Wind I’ve always had the impression that he’d also be more tanned, from working long hours at the ranch. If he had darker and warmer colouring then the gold chainmail wouldn’t work as well and it would have to be a cool toned silver. Which would be a nice nod to his grey wolf form and more importantly would really make his grey face markings pop.
I wish he wore his green hat. He was directly told by one of the light spirits that it was the same garb worn by the hero before him, who he ends up getting to know personally during TP and learns he’s family. Whether or not he likes it is completely irrelevant, because he would wear it 100% of the time while doing hero stuff to honour his ancestor’s legacy.
Twilight arguable has the scruffiest tunic, but the reason why I think he’s chosen to mend it rather than get it replaced is because it holds that much significance to him. Therefore, he’d value the whole thing and wear. the. hat.
The only excuse I’ll accept is that he lost it or it got destroyed during a battle, and even then he’d surely make a new one.
This isn’t important for character or practical reasons, but I’d like him to have longer hair. A shaggy wolf cut perhaps? A mullet situation? I’ve seen the fanart and it all looks amazing, so just...throwing it out there.
Score:
Aesthetic and visual score (/10): 8
Character representation score (/5): 4
Practicality score (/5): 4
Total (/20): 16
It’s a really strong design: visually interesting, practical if a bit well-worn and full of characterisation. It tells you about who he is and what he’s been through just through what he’s wearing, like Time’s design. But better.
~~~
Thanks for reading! What modifications would you make to their designs? And do you agree with me or not? I’d love to know :)
Masterlist
9th place in the character design ranking
8th place
7th place
6th place
5th place
3rd place
1st place
Character analysis posts:
Hero of the Sky, Hero of Time, Hero of Twilight, Hero of the Wild, Hero of Warriors
#linked universe#linkeduniverse#lu#lu twilight#lu twi#linked universe twilight#twilight#lu character design analysis#character design analysis#defo not biased
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Last week I saw a documentary about the Edinburgh Festival’s Late ‘n’ Live show, which had multiple moments that I turned into gifs and posted on here.
Another angle on Cowgate, featuring John Oliver brutally attacking the thing with a pipe, Daniel Kitson with a hammer, Demitri Martin looking a bit like a mechanic from a movie working on a car with his sleeves rolled up, David O’Doherty appearing to mainly be there as John Oliver’s cheerleader, and Adam Hills narrating the event through freestyle rap:
Adam Hills kissing Johnny Vegas while Daniel Kitson and Ross Noble hold him down, as they try to drag him off stage because he’s overrun by 20 minutes and it’s 3:30 AM and he’s drunk and refusing to leave:
David O’Doherty throwing himself wildly at Daniel Kitson, the floor, and Jason Byrne:
Russell Howard shouting at people:
(I should acknowledge at this point that I’m not an actual gif maker who knows how to do colour correction and all that cool stuff, and all due respect to people who are, when I say I’ve “made gifs” I just mean I cut out a video clip and put it in an online gif converter so I can show people something.)
I enjoyed that, and it made me go through my folder where I’ve saved all the gifs I’ve made for this blog in the last couple of years. Here are a few of my favourites from that folder:
From the first ever episode of The Last Leg (first episode of their actual show, after the London 2012 ones), which is after the watershed, and it has been established that this live show is allowed to say anything but “cunt”. This has been established a few times when guests - notably Miriam Margolyes twice in a couple of minutes one time, and on another occasion, of all people, Richard Osman - have dropped the C Bomb, and every time, it makes Josh and Alex laugh while Adam Hills has to sheepishly look at the camera and say that joking aside, we genuine apologize to anyone offended by that language.
Anyway, that first episode has a sense of tension throughout, like Josh Widdicombe and Adam Hills both couldn’t quite believe they’re been given this show, and were scared of doing anything that could fuck it up. Alex Brooker seemed much more relaxed than the other two, and this gif is of the first swear word that got used on the show. I saved it because I think it’s funny that even without sound, you can tell exactly when Alex Brooker says the word “fuck” just by looking at Josh Widdicombe and seeing the moment when he flinches and winces a bit, clearly for a split second forgetting that they’re allowed to say that one, because he’s so nervous about anyone doing anything that will fuck up this opportunity.
This next one I saved because, comedy aside, everything else aside, genuinely fucking impressive. Seriously. Stephen K. Amos picking up Daniel Kitson and throwing him on the ground at the Late ‘n’ Live show at the Edinburgh Festival in 2005 - the fact that that happened is weird and funny and it’s amazing that it’s still on YouTube after all these years. But that alone would not have been worth turning into a gif. I made this one because I have spent 18 years learning and then teaching a sport where that exact thing is one of the more complex and difficult moves to get right, and that is very well done. I’ve coached national-level athletes who’ve practised for years and don’t do that move that well. I could once have done it about that well, back when I was still competing, because it was one of my favourite moves and I spent hours and hours for years learning to get it right. That little hip movement he does halfway through - that looks simple, but it’s fucking hard to do when you’re carrying someone’s body weight. And too easy to feel like you’ve got it right, but someone watching from the outside can see you where nowhere near.
I don’t know why comedian Stephen K. Amos is able to do a wrestling move better than a lot of high-level competitive wrestlers. I looked it up and didn’t find anything about him having experience as a wrestler. Meaning that’s amazing. Forget about the novelty of comedians at a late-night gig taking off their shirts and physically attacking each other on stage - the real story here is that Stephen K. Amos is a great loss to combat sports.
Desiree Burch scoring an own goal while playing the goalkeeper position, in a one-on-one game:
One of the final episodes of Mock the Week, Ed Byrne using one of his last Scenes We’d Like to See to fuck with Dara O’Briain one more time. Some things never changed in 17 years.
Hugh Dennis and Noel Fielding breaking the rule of Taskmaster by being genuinely pretty good at something athletic. Solid golf swings with pool cues.
Last year when I re-watched Taskmaster season 4, I made a bunch of gifs out of it. Here’s Joe Lycett breaking a bucket:
And here he is calling Alex a fucking prick for making him eat his own sandwich:
For some reason I always find it really funny when on The Last Leg, a live show where people are always conscious of how they look because if they do something wrong it can’t be fixed in the edit, people use the little TV above the camera that shows what’s being filmed as a mirror. Here are Josh Widdicombe and Joe Thomas using it to fix their hair:
The time Russell Howard said something on an episode of Good News that made my blood run cold for a second, even though I know all it really means is some writer on the show found a meme and added it to the script.
No you fucking didn’t, Russell. You didn’t find anything on Tumblr, you don’t hang out on Tumblr. At least, you’d better fucking not. No one’s supposed to know we’re here.
Sarah Kendall showing off her karate skills on Question Team, which I saved for reasons related entirely to me looking very respectfully and non-objectifyingly with my female gaze. My gay female gaze.
...Here is a gif of Sue Perkins that I made for the exact same reason:
Here is Sean Lock drinking from a massive bottle of whiskey on 8 Out of 10 Cats:
Finally, a few gifs from the greatest video on all of YouTube. I’ve heard Nish Kumar explain that Joel Dommett has a theory that all comedians play football the same way they do comedy. Nish says he believes this theory applies in his own case, because when he plays football, he is “wildly inconsistent and often found on the left wing.”
Let’s see if this holds true for any others. Lee Mack will take any opportunity that comes his way to try something fancy and show-off-y, and it works quite a bit more often than it doesn’t but not every time:
Russell Howard is very enthusiastic but can get ahead of himself in his enthusiasm, and that sometimes trips him up:
Sometimes Alun Cochrane is off doing his own thing, out of step with his peers, and every once in a while you just look over and say, “Wait, what the hell is Alun Cochrane doing over there?”
John Oliver is willing to throw himself into things hard and get knocked around for the sake of his sport/art:
Andy Zaltzman will attack a joke/ball and then stay on it like a fucking terrier, tenaciously coming back to it just when you think he’s letting it go:
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Hi!!!! No worries if you don’t want to tell me or respond lol. But I really like the colour grading you did on that most recent Joel Miller gif set. I do photography and I’ve been struggling for ages to find a way to bring out the warm sort of brown tones without making things feel too muddy or red. Just curious about what HSL adjustments you made / what colour grading helped you get that look?
ohhhh my god thank you so much??? this might be a convoluted answer/unnecessary rant so i apologize in advance lol but i tend to keep the colorings/psds i use for gifs saved in a folder so every gif i make in a set is consistent with color/lighting/shading/whatever. i get anxious if there's even a little bit of difference per gif lol
a lot of what turned out in those gifs has to do with the lighting/coloring that's already in the show/that specific episode/scene. i've got the rest of the episodes' gifsets made and finished but i can try and kind of show what i'm talking about. they all look different color-wise, at least in my opinion, because of the differences in each episode's lighting. if that makes sense.
the goal with any gif i make, regardless of show/movie, is to make them either
1) better than what was there before (for example, if the movie is INCREDIBLY blue/yellow then i try and color correct that blue or yellow to be more neutral)(i'm looking at you triple frontier and your dark, blue ass scenes dfjkdflh)
and
2) not whitewash pedro. this is incredibly important (at least in my opinion) because i've noticed a lot of gifmakers (or least they used to) went for a really pastel/pale look and it whitewashed poc so dramatically and it was ~problematic~ to say the least. (i used to make gifs for a band that consisted of all mexican band members and i got hate a few times/people policing how i should color my gifs so the band wouldn't get whitewashed, so it's something i've been hyper aware of ever since)
so, even if i'm going for a more moody/darker aesthetic like i am with these gifsets of tlou, i never try and diminish the color pedro has in his skin tone. he's got a lot of color in his skin and i want to be able to see it, y'know what i mean?
basically, that boils down to keeping a lot of the warmer tones while also going for an ~aesthetic~ and it can be really hard sometimes. sometimes a show or movie, in this case the last of us, every episode is lit a little differently since it takes place over the course of a year.
i'll put some examples under the cut:
ok so i'll use episodes 2 and 8 as my examples.
to begin with, the last of us has, what i call, a "post-apocalyptic filter" over the top of it so i kinda have to work with that from the start. lots of greens/earthy brown tones and stuff.
this is with only sharpening applied and no color or anything:
and this is with my previously mentioned ~dark and moody~ psd applied on top of that sharpening:
now, this is the same color grading i used on that gifset you were mentioning.
this is also the same color grading i used on episode 8, which takes place in the winter/snowy areas so the coloring to begin with is going to reflect that:
and now with the coloring:
the big thing between these two scenes is that in the winter one, he's also recovering from actively dying and being deathly pale so any color he had in his face is really minimal lmao
so this is already way too fucking long and i don't think i even actually answered your question i am so sorry lol
to start, i ALWAYS start with an automatic curves layer and then adjust accordingly.
the actual color grading part mostly consists of vibrance, hue/saturation, selective color, channel mixer, gradient map, and level layers. i'm willing to give you the psd privately if you'd like to have a closer look at them!
thank you so much for asking and for putting up with my ranting lmao
#toointojoelmiller#asks#i really hope i answered this jfc#if i didn't i'm really sorry#it felt like i was trying to explain like 7 things at once lmao
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Well here it is! This is the “prerequisite” project I’ve been referencing for the last 6 months. Overall, I’m happy on how it came out and I learnt quite a few things on sculpting, rigging and animation while doing this: which was the point of this project…
In light of this, let’s go through the development of Project Starlight step-by-step and see what I have learnt. So read on down below!
So this R&D project started way back in February 2022 when I set out to create a “next generation” style of rig for future use on my projects. Traditionally, I would try new things on “production” rigs – which hasn’t always played into my favour. This time I wanted to do it as a separate rig and address any issues before I actually make a “proper” rig with what I wanted to implement!
What I hoped to learn, or otherwise improve upon are:
Try to figure out my own cartoonish-style - the last time I tried was in 2017 with those pony rigs that got scrapped after discovering some major issues, and the look of them was a little left to be desired.
I want to further improve my skills in sculpting and retopologising the mesh for rigging.
I wanted to replace my traditionally modelled hair with something that is more dynamic and gives better feedback to me, the artist, while it is being created.
Also to give me a look more akin to big studio productions!
I wanted to figure out how to get Sub-Surface Scattering working properly in textures.
I wanted all the eye controls (even those relating to eye size via textures) to be done with bones instead of the sliders found in all my older rigs.
In a similar vein: I want facial controls in general be done with bones.
Have a fake rim light for easier lighting around the edges of the character.
Have actual jiggle physics for hair to animate them dynamically and not individually by hand, which both be faster and less tedious to do!
Even though I just said the story started February; that is technically untrue as it saw a brief glimpse before shelving it after I quickly realise I’m taking on more projects then I can handle. It really began in November of the same year with me creating a “Character Feature Document”, and the concept art inside Krita”. The feature document, as the name suggests, is a way for me to document all the features I wish a rig to have before starting… Pretty good to make sure I don’t forget anything knowing what my memory is like!
Regarding the concept art: The first revision on the hair wasn’t quite up to snuff with varying things that made it look weird. To combat this I went over the sketch in different colours to the one I did the initial sketch on and dad a sort of “editors note” thing on what needed to be improved.
Additionally, the concept art itself I originally was going to have multiple variations of skin, eye and hair colour and find what I liked most… However, I found a combination I liked immediately, so I stuck with it!
One I completed the concept art, the project was shelved again until I got my current Graphics Display Tablet; this was because the Wacom “Pen and Touch” tablet I had at the time was irritating to use without any sort of “Hand to Eye” coordination, which would make sculpting Project Starlight considerably easier.
I’m going to skip ahead 3 months to March after I did some practice on getting my sculpting skills remotely close to where they need to be… The sculpting of Project Starlight itself went very well and I feel this is the right step in the direction of finding my own artstyle I would like to pursue in the future. Additionally, I modelled the individual teeth meshes instead of using a half cylinder the last time I did this style; this in itself made the mesh feel higher quality! I had one tooth on the left side chipped, which I do like, but probably could’ve been more prominent then it was. However, I think some further practising is required with things such as the nose could have more definition, the lips isn’t quite as I hoped and obviously the chin is too big. But for a first proper attempt since 2017 for a cartoonish-style: I think she has turned out pretty well.
For the hair, I used NURBS to path and shape everything. I was originally going to use one style for the entire thing and overlay it over each other for a nice, cartoonish effect; however I decided instead to use 2 different styles as you see in the “Tech Demo” video to save time as I was a little behind for my original deadline of 1st June, no small thanks to the fact I can’t spend the hours that I use to. Overall I think it has turned out pretty well, however next time I think I would decrease the hair going around on the characters head as you may have noticed in the turntable portion that at around the base of the neck the hair stops going around the head towards the ponytail in a natural, circular style, and go box-y with me squeezing in the mesh so it wouldn’t look empty and even more weird then it ended up looking. Changing the size and position I imagine would solve that issue…
For texturing of the body; I moved to Substance Painter 2019. The base skin texture is actually a built-in “Smart” preset that Adobe shipped with the program… All I did was hiding a few of the detail layers as I wasn’t going for ultra-realism as an art style, then I changed the default colour to an Asian-inspired skin tone. The Sub-Surface colour is handled by a fill layer set to “Cedge”, some of it’s positioning was done as part of the Smart Texture’s work, but I also painted a few masks around the cheek and mouth area which I think gives Project Starlight more alive and dynamic in her texture which I think looks very nice! The freckles were created with a brown fill layer and I had some scattering enabled on the brush when I did the mask… I cannot remember the size and scatter values I used, but suffice to say it took a lot of trail and error to get it looking remotely close to the concept art. Mirroring really did help here!
The mouth and tongue is also part of the same texture, but there isn’t much to talk about with it – they’re mostly just base colours with some specular map applied. However the tongue did get some extra TLC with a bump map and a bit more detail added to the colour. This was actually the first time I used the “blur” effect in Substance Painter, or even was aware of it’s existence. I painted some white colouring on top of the base pink tongue colour, and lowered it’s opacity, then blurred it to blend it into the main colour. In all honestly Substance Painter misled me slightly with the intensity as it had a more seamless blended then it did when seen in Blender… So next time I would increase the intensity.
Overall though, I think the texture styling I went for is a nice blend of photorealism and cartoonish. Last time I tried to have anything like this in terms of styling was the “hand painted” style with the Ponyville houses back in 2017 with bump maps and the like – but the terrible way I UV mapped it and my reluctance to use presets as a starting base meant it looked very unappealing. Project Starlight on the other hand looks very cute and has a certain Pixar/Dreamworks vibe to it.
Also as a fun fact – Project Starlight was last thing to be textured in Substance Painter before moving to ArmorPaint a few months ago!
Originally I was going to create the eye texture in GIMP and import that into Blender… However I couldn’t get styling right for the inner eye with the above image being my last attempt… Since I couldn’t get what I desired through traditional means: I decided to go down the procedural texture route!
Procedural textures does have some immediate benefits such as being more resource efficient compared to image textures – I’m pretty sure the bottleneck is my 3060 for the terrible performance as the body texture was exported at 8K for fun! Anyways, using this tutorial by CGRogue as a base; I created the eye texture. There is some slight differences in my one. I’m very happy how it has turned out, and it fits the style of the main head texture surprisingly nicely! I have further modified the highlight portion of the texture and created templates for me to “drag and drop” onto future non-chibi rigs if I need them.
When rigging the nose I noticed the way I retopologised was weird and created a “w” shape when the upper lip bones moved. It turns out the way I merged vertices to the centre was causing issues, and to get around it I created an additional set of edges around the circumference of the mouth which gave me more natural results. Next time I won’t merge any vertices around the nose to avoid this issue again.
An another unexpected issue I encountered while rigging the character was getting the eyelash position line up with the eyelid. It turns out you can’t have have 2 set of edges in between a singular set, and the control bone, will not deform in the way you’d expect. Each edge needs to perfectly line-up on each respective mesh and the bone controlling that edge… Doing that got the entire area to work properly. The eyebrows also had a similar issue to the eyelash; but to avoid repetition I’ll not repeat the process I said earlier… But suffice to say what I did to fix the eyelash also worked pretty well eyebrows.
However, that was not the only issue I had with the eyelid; this one was a lot less of an issue but with this rig I wanted to have the eyes slightly influence the position of the surrounding mesh from the eyelids. Originally I went with a 50/50 ratio for the influence of the eyelid bones to the eyes, but this caused a quite large distortion which was very distracting and overall undesirable – so setting the ratio to 90/10 made it behave a lot better. I wish I could’ve had more influence from the eye, even a 80/20 split would’ve been better as I feel it’s too subtle and you don’t really pick up on it when Project Starlight is moving! Especially when compared to rigs made by other people that inspired this decision.
When it comes to the hair, since I used NURBs to create it – rigging it to animate is a little difficult… Since most people these days uses Blender’s hair system; there isn’t any tutorials for my styling – This style of hair is meant to be static for things such as figure-like sculpt. This meant I had to figure it out myself! The first thing was converting the hair into a riggable mesh: First I go to “Mesh” which can be found through “Objects > Convert”, then un-subdividing that 4-6 times. This gave me a mesh that I could easily weight to the bones. To have the hair as smooth as it was originally, I added a subdivision modifier and set that to the amount I originally decimated it by. From there rigging it is just like any other mesh in Blender.
Next up is having jiggle physics! This isn’t something I used even back in my SFM days due to never taking gravity into consideration, and it would often clip into the rest of the body when the character is moving. Now however, I wanted some automation to make my life a little easier when animating. I was hoping to not need an external plugin, but there doesn’t appear to be a built-in solution in Blender yet as of 3.5; so I used a Python plugin called “Wiggle 2.2” for the job! While it can work in real-time: I quickly found out it’s an absolute CPU hog and eats at least 70% of the processing power of my Ryzen 7-3700X based system… So instead I have Wiggle disabled in the scene when I don’t need it yet in the animation process, and bake the sequence when I’m practically done with the animation! The last 3-4 bones are effected by this script, the rest still requires animation by hand to help make sure the hair takes gravity into consideration.
The advantage of using Wiggle is that it has collision detection – so the hair bounces off the head when it comes into contact! This makes it massively more useful compared the the jiggle system in SFM! And that is nothing to say you can use certain simulation features such as “Wind” to have the hair blowing naturally. Seemed like a natural way to test the hair physics in the end showcase, honestly!
If you’re more of a visual learner: I have uploaded a tutorial on my secondary channel detailing this process for you to follow.
Overall, the Project Starlight has 62 individual controls for the face – a new PB! I didn’t really use all of them during testing, but I had them there just in case.
Since moving to Blender I kept the exact hierarchy I’ve been using during the Cinema 4D era, which itself is heavily inspired on how it is structured in Source Filmmaker! So in this rig I wanted to try to get the rig to conform with with the standards in Blender to make it easier to import into projects… This means everything should be neatly packed into the “Armature” object.
When it comes to my rigs: they are never that easy to read with everything on a single layer, and uses the default “bone” shape. This makes, say my chibi pony rigs, really difficult to see how the character’s mouth is when playing back the animation without hiding the rig. So in Project Starlight I decided to group controls for certain areas of the rig into separate layers: so layer 1 for the body controls, layer 2 for the upper face, layer 3 for eyes, etc! I think this has help de-cluttered the rig while still giving me the controls I want when they are needed… This alone really helped with the UX honestly.
Also to help with readability I wanted a somewhat unobtrusive shape for the controls. Originally I wanted to do a Pixar Presto thing where you select part of the mesh and see the results without the need of the bones being exposed – but the the test using the Gorgie head last year shows that isn’t practical in Blender. So instead I turned to Dreamworks and their Apollo software for inspiration: Apollo uses these nice, clean spheres that doesn’t take up too much space on the rigs but Dreamworks’ Animators can easily tell what that bone is for! When Apollo was introduced nearly 9 years ago, all those spheres were a singular colour, but in more recent revisions (as seen in a recent BTS video), it’s all colour coded!
Knowing that was how I wanted Project Starlight’s rig to look – I jumped into Blender! I used IcoSpheres specifically as I felt the UV variety didn’t really suit what I was after. Since not all the bones are the same size, it took a little while to getting the custom shape as close to uniform across the entire rig… Fortunately Blender has controls to modify the XYZ coordinates for position, rotation and scale for each bone’s “custom shape” – so it wasn’t that hard to do all things considering! The only NURB I used was for the “RootTransform” bone: in the past (back in the C4D days), it was a basic circle with no modification to the shape, this time I did a basic “compass” design for each direction by deleting ¾ of a circle and using a “Mirror” modifier to fill in the missing area of the shape. This proved very effective as I got the all the arrows looking identical for each direction without painstakingly trying to get all the points in the same direction – which made it a quick and easy job to do!
The colours I used for colour-coding what is what is dark blue, yellow and red depending on how far down the chain a given bone is:
Dark blue is for the main body controls (RootTransform, neck, head, etc).
Yellow is just below that and is for “general” face controls.
Dark red is the furthest down the chain and is for very minuet and specific controls such as each point in an eyebrow, or each “muscle” in the eyelid.
The exception is eyes which is a teal green to help differentiate it from everything else. Oddly enough, when I tried to add more colours to the rig to help with even more specific controls (like the hair for instance) it just made the entire thing feel more cluttered; which is the opposite on what I am trying to do… So those 3 primary is what I stuck with!
While using rigs created by other artists, I noticed that they had set up restraints for things such as how open the mouth can be or the rotation values of the eyelids. I have never tried to implement a similar thing myself, and that is evidenced that all my bones can go to infinity and beyond! Because of the benefits of having things move in a set amount, I had decided this was something else I wanted to try out in Project Starlight - luckily Blender has built in bone restraints for position, rotation, or scale; so it was really easy to implement! I had set a rotation restraint for the eyes and jaw, and positional ones for each of the 4 eyebrow bones. Overall, I think this was a success as it stopped the mouth going too wide, the eyes going “out of bounds”, and the eyebrows to act in a somewhat realistic way!
In the past when I try to “port” other people’s rigs to newer releases of Blender (like ones designed during the pre-2.8x era), I always had an issue where any object (typically NURBs) not weighted in the “Armature” object just ends up spewing out into the main hierarchy – which is less then ideal. I actually found that simply parenting the custom shapes onto the “Armature” object works exceptionally well, and when I did a test import of Project Starlight into a new project file; everything stayed inside that object! This makes it a lot easier to overall understand organise rigs into their respective collections when setting everything up before I block out my animation!
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Scars - Eruri Post-war + Erwin Lives AU (WIP)
Summary: Eruri’s first time seeing Levi’s whole face after they removed the bandages and stitches from his face.
I wrote this a while back and shared it on my twt for Eruri Angst Week Day 4: Scars + Post War. Being assured that it was actually decent, I thought I might share it here. This is a part of a larger Post-war WIP that i’ve started but because i have 2 more urgent projects atm, it had been put to the side. hopefully at some point, I will come back to it.
Erwin recalled the first time Hange had shown up without bandages over their left eye. The weather had begun to turn and outside the windows, frost began to form regularly on the branches. Usually this tended to signal the incoming dormancy period in the Survey Corps - a little less training and the eventual halting of all of their expeditions. It was fitting for the time. They all needed the break, most of all, the kids and Hange, who greeted him with false cheer before sitting down before him.
Their left eyelid was littered with pink scar tissue, exploding like fireworkds that trailed trailing to the top of their left cheek. Except, it wasn’t pretty like fireworks. Scars were never pretty, regardless of how one was always assured otherwise. But scars told stories no words or speech could ever tell - of will and bravery and suicidal charges with thumb-sized shreds of hope that it would have been all worth it in the end.
Levi’s scars now - the long one with raised skin running across his right eye, the two diamond shaped patches upon his left cheek, and a rough overlap of skin where his two fingers used to be - was a story of courage, of standing up against tyranny, and of humanity. A powerful story, indeed.
But the aftermath was this: the weather was the same now as it was back then - just frosting outside, cold enough that one could feel it in their missing limbs. Levi looked at himself in the mirror after the nurse had removed his bandage. He stared for a long, long time. Erwin almost asked what he had been so intensely staring at. Was it the scar, the faded colour in his right eye, or the sickly parlour to his skin that had him transfixed like that, his mouth curling downwards with contempt.
Scars weren’t pretty. Erwin knew that, and he was a romantic at heart. But Levi was a realist through and through. It was hard not to see the ugliness, even if one didn’t care too much about appearances.
“You look handsome.” Erwin brushed a hand through Levi’s hair. And he did look handsome with his hair simply parted in the middle - soft, like the pale blue shirt he was wearing. He was always handsome. No scar was going to ever change that for Erwin, and he would never tell Levi that he was anything else.
“Liar.” Levi snorted. “I look like a dog’s chew toy that got stitched back together by a five year old.”
He took another gaze at his reflection in the handheld mirror, then swallowed thickly. He hated the vision, Erwin could tell. The doctor had come to check his right eye a while ago too, and had concluded loss of vision from said eye. Hange had told them to expect that. But there was knowing something through words people spoke to you, and there was understanding that knowledge when the facts were laid out to you.
A cold weight settled in the room.
“You’re lucky Hange isn’t here to hear you say that. They were the ones who patched you up, afterall.” He said, and watched the tension bleed out of Levi’s shoulders.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”
“I know.”
Levi sighed through his noses then turned to Erwin. Erwin smiled back, hoping that it would have the desired effect. Levi had always said his smile was distracting.
“If you say something sappy again to make me feel better, I won’t believe you.” Levi turned back to the mirror.
“You don’t have to believe me. But you don’t have to keep looking in the mirror either.” With slow, gentle hands, Erwin placed his hand just beneath Levi’s jaw and tilted him away from that self-pity, away from the thing that blinded him more than he already was. He tentatively touched the very edge of the long scar with his thumb. Levi pulled back slightly at first, but then leaned back into his touch.
“It feels… it’s still a bit… strange.”
“I know.” Erwin nodded. “I remember.”
Levi’s eyes flicked to his right side by habit, where Erwin’s sleeve was neatly rolled up with Levi’s careful hands just that morning. It had taken some time, since Levi was unused with his dominant hand having only three fingers, the same which was still under white cotton bandages which Levi had complained about. He kept getting stains on them.
“Let’s go out tonight.” Erwin suggested, knowing that they both didn’t want to cook right after getting home. “Let’s go to that restaurant Falco took us to a while back - the one with the flatbreads and those dips you liked.”
Levi frowned, raising his bandaged hand. “We would have to eat with our hands.”
“I could feed you.”
Levi gave him another look. “I don’t want you to. You only have one hand. And I look crippled enough as it is.”
That wasn’t something Erwin had expected him to say. Levi was always so apathetic about certain things, specifically about others’ perception of him and how they think of his attitudes. He dressed nicely, but mostly because he liked how certain things looked, like how he loved wearing his cravat with his old Scouts uniform, and not because of any discernible public trend.
But this wound was still raw beneath the surface, Erwin reminded himself. It had only been so long since the final battle. Levi still forgot that he only had eight fingers, sometimes.
“Okay.” Erwin relented, his throat tight. “Well, umh… I’ll bring some containers to the restaurant and ask them to pack us food to go, then. So we can eat at home. Is that better?”
Levi nodded after a moment. Erwin kissed his cheek. “Good.”
#wip#wip wednesday#meapwrites#eruri#eruri fanfic#aot#snk#levi ackerman#erwin smith#attack on titan#shingeki no kyojin
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Admin prompt 12
“Describe yourself how you would describe a character you’re introducing”
I am extremely curious 👀👀
Also I hope no one is bullying you in the asks box! Haven't asked for a bit because I was worried you got overwhelmed.
Att. Saiyuki boys person
Thank you so much for checking on me! You’re so incredibly sweet, my Saiyuki boys anon! (Also, like, bless you and the one other Saiyuki follower I have for helping keep this fandom alive!) I actually only had one more rude message after those first couple I complained about, so I lucked out there. I think, because I addressed them publicly in a separate post, without naming them or publishing their words, they didn’t quite get the attention I’m sure they were after and moved on, which I’m very happy for and I had so many supportive readers, so thank you all once again. And thank you for this really interesting, surprising request, though Goddamn, I admit it’s probably the hardest thing I’ve ever written because when asked to describe myself, I tend to just give basic stats – height, eye and hair colour, visible markings…basically, whatever you’d note down when conducting an autopsy, haha! I have rewritten this countless times and am just saying fuck it, and I’m just going to bore everyone by narrating the last ten to fifteen minutes of my life as if I was writing a scene in a book.
A sudden gust of wind whipped by, blowing her hair all over the place. Oh well, it was messy anyway, hastily whipped up into a bun held in place by a pen when an elastic couldn’t be found quickly enough for her liking. Taking one last draw off her cigarette, eyes taking in the gorgeous blue of the sky as her thoughts wandered, she half-turned and tossed the cigarette into the butt can, dousing it with the bottle of water she kept outside for just that reason. She sighed and allowed herself to bask just a bit longer in the warmth and atmosphere of the day outside as she pulled out her phone and scrolled through the to-do list she’d made for the day yet again. Ticking off the latest completed task, she shook her head and, half-smiling that crooked smile of hers, stood and stretched before heading back inside.
Her feet padded audibly across the floors of her apartment and though she tried to avoid the creaky spot in the floor, she hit it once again, not quite used to her new place enough to have guessed the correct spot. Damn…she hoped she didn’t have neighbours trying to sleep underneath her. Though she was surprisingly light on her feet and quick for both her size and height, she always worried she was making just a bit too much noise when it came to disturbing her neighbours.
Making her way quickly into her kitchen, with the click of a button she set the coffee going into her favourite mug (chipping now, but she hated to throw it out – who knew when she’d find another Inigo Montoya mug, after all?). Her thoughts seemed to be going a million miles a minute, so many ideas and plots and stories whooshing around without rhyme or reason, and she groaned, lifting a hand to rub at her tired eyes, pushing her glasses up into her mess of dark hair. She should probably clean those while she waited, honestly, and she reached up to pull the thick-rimmed tortoiseshell frames from their perch before giving them an almost thoughtless, habitual wipe with the bottom edge of the baggy, stained, ripped but incredibly comfortable Nirvana hoodie that was always her go-to on writing days.
The coffee shut off and she prepared to add in the usual, swinging herself up on the little pink stool in the kitchen to reach the cupboard where she kept the creamer and sugar. It seemed that no matter where she lived, kitchens just really weren’t built for short people. Even standing on tiptoes, she was just barely able to reach the second shelf of the upper cupboards…God, someday, she swore she’d have enough money to buy a place and have the kitchen custom built for people five feet and under. See how all those tall people struggled then!
Her feet knew just where to go though, after she tossed the spoon in the sink, and with coffee in hand, she headed back to her desk and the computer. A click of the mouse brought the word document back up onto the screen and her brown eyes scanned the sentences already typed onto the page. Small, broad hands, stubby fingered, with nails kept almost brutally short but brightly polished (chipping – she’d have to redo that before work tomorrow) settled onto the keyboard. Please let me find all the words this time, all the sentences to get my thoughts properly to all of them, she prayed before the air was filled with the sound of keystrokes, fast and forceful.
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ATEEZ: GUERRILLA
It has taken me three days to calm down and form coherent thoughts. This turned out longer than expected so it’s behind a cut. If you haven’t watched the music video, this is your sign from God.
1) Firstly. Who does all the screaming. I want to know. It’s a very important piece of information that I need to know. The laugh is Hongjoong’s but does he also do all the screaming. I need answers, NASA!
2) The Energy. Every single reaction I’ve seen about this song uses the word “energy”. Ateez do what other groups think they’re doing when the genre is hype because I’ve never NOT ONCE seen Ateez slack off. They leave blood and sweat on the floor for their rivals to slip on. When I first heard the song I thought my heart was just pounding from the excitement but my oximeter said I was actually having a near svt episode, lol. I shouldn’t laugh, it’s kind of unpleasant but HR 120 bpm? Yeah, only Ateez tbh.
3) Production Quality. I’d like to thank the Academy and KQ for the increase in budget for the MV because it really shows. They used it in a way that wasn’t an empty flex (expensive clothes, meaningless sets, fireworks) but rather, added to the world they’ve been building up since debut. You can see the narrative continue and I really appreciate that. The audio production on the song is just flaw free for me. I usually have so much to nitpick, even in good songs, but I have nothing else to add to Guerrilla. It must have so many layers and tracks to it but it was quiet when it needed to be and absolutely feral at the right parts. What a way to end a track. It didn’t fade out but exploded like a grenade. You can’t ever say that Ateez don’t commit to a concept in every single sense. You’ve heard of Ugly Crying, well Ateez Ugly Hype and have never been afraid to do that.
3) War Aesthetics. Okay bitch, listen, the creative team really stepped up 800% here for this era and this MV. There are so many warfare references in those 4 minutes that it makes my mind exhausted just thinking of the planning that went into all this. The speaker-bombs were fucking inspired. The use of zeppelins immediately remind me of war, particularly WW1, and an alternative steampunk reality. This part of the MV, which is a piece of art tbh, has got to be a homage to ‘Raising the flag on Iwo Jima’ during WW2 as well as Banksy’s Rage, The Flower Thrower piece in Jerusalem. I think that part of the MV was deliberately in slow motion because the inspiration came from still images. They make very clear statements about war and anti-war sentiments. Without boring you all, the last thing I wanted to mention is the font and colours used for the choreo scenes looks straight from vintage propaganda media. I could keep going but this post is already way too long.
4) Metal/Rock Aesthetics. That band room? With all the cables and amps? The mics? The spy cameras? The tv monitors? The fisheye lens? You can tell the team has watched a billion 1990s music videos. It also reminded me a lot of American Idiot. That’s all I wanted to say about that. There’s just a lot of influence in those shots.
5) Screamo in KPOP?! The way it was incorporated was really well done because it’s not prominent enough to scare away the more sensitive casual listener but it was definitely prominent enough for metal fans to have a crisis. We talk about Cultural Reset-This and Cultural Reset-That but nobody has produced a track like Guerrilla before. Nobody. This is one of those times where you can use hyperbole and be right. Nobody has made a song like this and there is no other song like this in KPOP right now. Respect to the Ateez team and the members for their total commitment because they operate like one big breathing organism and that’s why everything feels cohesive. I’ve been waiting 84 years for this. I hope we get to see it with a band one day.
6) Kim Hongjoong. I don’t know if it’s true or not but I feel his influence all over this. This is HIS era and the style/genre suits him the best. I know he likes Linkin Park and at the very least, this style of music, but I do wonder how much he was able to dictate the Ateez sound and direction. Guerrilla is so good and fed me so well that even if they never do this style again, I’m actually fine with that.
7) Literally. I just think it’s so amusing how literal this whole song/mv is. There’s just no “hidden meanings” or subtleties here. I’m not sure Ateez can even do subtle. Even their soft material is aggressively emotive. Haha.
8) People sometimes wonder why I only write long reviews about Ateez music but it’s because they always give me meat to sink my teeth into. Answer is still my Top 3 favourite kpop songs of ALL TIME. There’s just always so much to talk about and it doesn’t even hinge on how hot the members are. You know a group is Legit Good when visual appeal isn’t the first thing I want to talk about. We’re so lucky to live in the Ateez Era.
#ateez#guerrilla mv#text#music review#sort of#hongjoong#san#seonghwa#yunho#mingi#yeosang#jongho#i'm very proud of them#i just wish nothing but the best for this group#they all dived head first into this#and i appreciate that so much
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I posted 1,334 times in 2022
That's 289 more posts than 2021!
80 posts created (6%)
1,254 posts reblogged (94%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@knitmeapony
@ponyregrets
@cardigarden
@ekjohnston
I tagged 734 of my posts in 2022
Only 45% of my posts had no tags
#ink tumbl tober 2022 - 26 posts
#2022 vibes - 25 posts
#dracula daily - 16 posts
#forever reblog - 16 posts
#tumblr culture - 12 posts
#agreed - 11 posts
#this is the content i'm here for - 8 posts
#art - 8 posts
#big mood - 8 posts
#same - 8 posts
Longest Tag: 77 characters
#the clowns are more fair and balanced on average than professional news sites
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Day 10: Colour of the Sky
[Image ID: page divided into 6 long columns that are offset like a very boring maze or the line to get through airport security- top right is white and it fades into light to darker blue, light blue into yellow, orange, red, dark red, black, black with stars, fading to velvety indigo, amethyst, pale pink, hot pink and back fading to white.]
9 notes - Posted October 10, 2022
#4
On Belonging
I speak in the language of food. I will feed you, dammit. You belong here. Have food you can eat and hopefully you like. It won’t be a punishment. It won’t be half-assed. If you can’t eat here, you won’t truly believe you belong here.
Which is why I’m making my own motherfucking pizza that is not an insult to my very existence to put in my mouth, why I’m bringing a dessert I can eat, why I’m bringing a vegan cookie recipe to work’s game night. There are 2 vegans and 2 GF (one of them is me).... and the idea that “you make do” and eat around the edges is 100% unconscionable. It will not be as broad a choice of things as literally everyone else in the room will be able to eat-- they will be eating Actually Good Pizza, pizza they take for granted. They will eat cookies without thinking twice. They won’t skip it because there’s no ingredient list. They won’t plaster on a brittle smile and go home irritated and hungry because there was literally no food they could trust to eat without causing themself harm. I realize this isn’t the end all and be all, but for fuck’s sake. It’s also not actually that hard to make food that helps people believe they should be in the space.
9 notes - Posted November 18, 2022
#3
Ink-tumbl-tober
I’ve decided to mix things up a bit. Instead of following the Inktober 2022 prompts, I’m going to see if I can come up with all-tumblr-based prompts. The gargoyle from day 1 was first seen on Tumblr. I’m not tossing out Scuttle because I love that little squirrel. So-- here we go! Gonna give it a shot. Might take a day or two to get all the prompts sorted, so feel free to suggest a few. Here’s what I got so far:
Ides of March
Miette
Ea Nasir
Spooky dancing pumpkin head guy?
color theory
Destiel
OK.... that’s as far as I got. I have to go to bed. I will get there!
11 notes - Posted October 2, 2022
#2
Ink tumbl tober Day 5: Color Theory
[image id: the witness’s point of view is somewhere above ceiling level looking down a hallway with dramatic perspective. There is a door on the left closest to the witness and a hallway that bisects the right wall. The hallway ends with an open door. From the left and forward exits, the grayscale shading shows that the rooms are brighter than the hall, but the right corridor is dramatically unlit. Starting somewhere in the far off room, a ribbon of red swoops serpentine, coming in from the right, disappearing off out of frame before coming up like a freakish rollercoaster up the wall and into the hall’s corner before swooping down and dramatically expanding into a broadening pool before narrowing to split- part to slither down the right side corridor and the rest aiming straight for the left room that is closest to the witness. The red color splashed up the left wall a few feet from the room and out of frame. The red is now a pool as it goes out of frame taking up almost the whole hallway closest to the witness. It’s a lately renovated children’s hospital. The designer has very strong opinions about color theory. ]
18 notes - Posted October 5, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
Ink tumbl tober Day 6: Blorbo
Y’all. I spent the last 2+ hours working on this. The power of the graphite compelled me and I was not up for ink on this scale. Description below drawing will have spoilers
This is the royal family of Askazer-Shivadlakia and their chosen family: King Emeritus Michaelis; his partner Jes; Jes’s son Noah; TV and internet influencer chef Eddie Rambler, fiancé to King Gregory; King Gregory III; Gregory’s cousin [edit: Alanna] and administrator for the king; Duke Gerald (Jerry), royal vizier and cousin to the king from the other side of the family.
This is for @spinningprincess who emphatically campaigned that for blorbo I do the Shivadhverse characters- the whole set- and I decided a family portrait was the way to go. If I were to do over, I’d have made the scale for them much bigger so I could have given their faces more detail. @copperbadge was beyond generous and wrote a novella length description on how he imagines everyone. Posting an hour shy of tomorrow - and I don’t care.
69 notes - Posted October 5, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
I just have to add....
Nice.
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So much is happening all at once.
Processing is haaaaaaard. There's so much I want to say but it's like my brain just doesn't have the power (how you doin', long covid brain fog). I started my new job. I've been working for three weeks now and it still isn't sinking in. Ever since I got into a car accident at the end of April, I've been actively tuning out my base thoughts and feelings in favour of going with the flow. I can get through *~the present moment~* but every emotion I push down bubbles away inside until the pressure is too intense and I can't stop crying and making a general tit of myself. Then I have to be responsible again so I force my brain into screensaver mode, and do my best impression of a functioning adult until it's safe to take my mask off and resume panicking. It's all so new to me. In the last 15 years I have worked at two McDonald's stores, a jewellers, a very brief stint in a two dollar shop, and was an office administrator for a respite camp. Collectively, that's just under three years worth of employment. I spent at least four years in education, and the remaining eight years completely debilitated by mental illness and a developmental issue.
So yeah, on some level I understand that this is a reasonable reaction for someone like me who spent so many years suffering and struggling to get my foot in the door of society and find any sort of employment. Now I support two women to live as independently as possible and it honestly doesn't feel like work most of the time. BUT STILL! I feel like I should be grateful and cheery about this change in circumstance but I'm just scared, sleepy, and dopey. If I'm not working then I'm always a little bit drunk. If I'm not drinking, it's because I'm trying to nap (which my cat finds highly offensive. He goes out of his way to prohibit my rest at all costs). I have my hobbies but I do them in a daze if I do them at all. Most of the time it feels like I'm watching myself through a foggy bathroom mirror. My movements are all automated response. I haven't felt much like going out because I need so much time to recover from, I'unno, just being? Change is hard even for neurotypicals, it's especially hard for autistics.
It's taking me so long to get these words out. I'm actually quite concerned about this cognitive decline post-covid and I don't have a GP any more (but that's a sad story for another post). Writing is one of my most valuable therapeutic outputs and I feel so bogged down without it. I do lots of colouring and zen patterns these days because writing takes up so much energy. I have to get these things out before they consume me, again. My days are spent working or in anticipation of work. It took me four months to get a haircut and I'm currently rocking two months worth of regrowth. My periods changed after vaccinations, and changed again after infection and it really fucks with my self-esteem. I used to get a few each year. Now I get it every two weeks. Every menstruating person I've talked to about this has also experienced a change, but no one seems to be doing any research beyond noting the phenomena.
I don't have a conclusion paragraph. It's finally time to bleach my hair.
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