#I’m in a mood about everything
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#I don’t understand how I go from having a decent day to being in a shitty mood#I’m in a mood about everything#I hate my fucking job but I’m still basing all these decisions around it like it’s the end all#I’m sick of myself#I got out of my writing funk but I fucking hate everything I’ve put on paper#can’t seem to clean up my tiny living space to make it feel better#I was talking to a friend after the movie we saw and got struck with that almighty of realizations that I’m the least accomplished#at least in this friend group#they have things they consider careers or at least not fucking Starbucks#they don’t have to work bullshit jobs anymore because they have degrees!#and job experience!#and I can’t even get myself to look at a college website#because my fucking brain doesn’t work right anymore#and I have no energy for any actual productive thoughts just stupid fucking fanfiction#Jesus fucking christ I’m sick of it all#I’m tired#I want to delete this fucking blog#it makes me feel fucking stupid
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Fengqing but they’re a carefree wandering samurai and a feisty grumpy wandering puppet god… aka KazuScara 😬
#fengqing#mu qing#feng xin#tgcf#天官赐福#digital art#fanart#genshin impact#kazuscara#art farts#samurai x puppet god au#idk#hahaha#I’m in a KazuScara mood#I have to make everything about fengqing
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I really do know that physical appearance isn’t everything but i also really hope that one day i get to experience someone i love looking at me and thinking i’m pretty
#wlw#wlw mood#sapphic#sapphism#lesbian#idk#i just haven’t really had many compliments on my appearance throughout my life#but the few times i have gotten them have been crazy#i end up thinking about it forever#idk i’m just forever excited about the idea of someone just plain old LIKING me#like bells and whistles of falling in love and everything aside#i truthfully deeply really want someone just to like me if that makes sense#also this isn’t like a sad post btw#it’s something im hopeful about and look forward to a lot :)#right now i just have to be a bit wistful about it though lol#im gay and i like sleeping
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“You are important.”
“I’m really worried about you. You need to take care of yourself, because you’re not okay, we can see it. are you drinking water and eating?”
“You’re scaring me. cause I know that you’re not okay, but I can do nothing.”
“Every day I hope to find something about the eggs because I can’t stand seeing q!Bad sad anymore”
“He’s changing every day, turning into something like a ghost… I’m so worried, it’s like at any moment he could just disappear.”
“I feel powerless. I think q!Bad is suffering a lot, but he doesn't admit it. I really want to help him, I've been thinking really hard about how to help him”
“He took me around, we hang out, he helped me a lot and gave me items. He is my best friend. I don’t know what I should do…”
ough q!bagi. every time she talks about q!bad it makes my heart break, she is so kind. they’ve known each other a week, but she says with her whole chest that this is my best friend and I Will find a way to help. she is the only person q!bad has straightforwardly admitted not being ok to. I’m so….
#I’m so normal about her#<- FALSE im going crazy about her character and this duo they hurt me#she is so observant and inquisitive about Everything she doesn’t take anything at face value#her detective mind sees a mystery and wants to solve it. q!bad is her enigma#but it all comes from a place of care for her friend#she pushes past his mask with her words- to a demon who lives in denial this is exactly what he needs#to open up a bit more#anyways I BEG for him to reveal ron to her#my girl would be happy to join tbh she threatens to torture cucurucho everyday#qsmp bagi#qsmp badboyhalo#qsmp#madrugaduo#also how she said in character she’s worried for him but Also normal irl gabi is worried for this fictional cubito too is skrsjskdk#same girl. mood.
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Deku
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my toxic trait is that when i’m reading in english i refuse to search the translation when i don’t know the meaning of a word
#i just trust the process that everything will make sense eventually#i was almost at the end of fourth wing when i decided to look up what a parapet is#and then i reread that initial scene#and i was like ‘oh it makes sense now’#😅#the word i struggled with in acotar was talons#i was so disappointed when i discovered it means claws#in my head it meant something different#but it took me at least two books to cave and search the meaning#i’m talking about this now bc i’m trying to read iron flame#and i just ain’t feeling it#i’m in a weird mood#amanda reads
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if heartstopper was unnecessarily sweet and didn't need to be made then explain why i kept expecting Nick to do something to just horrendously hurt Charlie or vice versa. If media doesn't teach queer kids that suffering is a prerequisite for happiness explain why i was on edge my entire first watch through waiting for the other shoe to drop and for it to end in some bittersweet or unsatisfying way.
#This is less me being mad at dumb people and more me just feeling so much about this series lol#idk it was just like. Such an uplifting hopeful show#and I have read the comics so I know that the later parts of the story go into some deeper topics of mental health and everything but#even then it’s handled in a hopeful way#it’s heartbreaking but it doesn’t make you feel that like emptiness that a lot of other queer media does#like it talks about the important stuff while still stressing that there’s light at the end of the tunnel#yknow?#idk#I’m just feeling a lot and I’m just so happy Heartstopper exists#it’s genuinely improved my mood so much lately#raine rambles#heartstopper netflix#heartstopper
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One of the biggest lies social media has created is that everyone cares what you do. In a sense, yeah, society as a whole cares morally what you do. But individually? Hobbies? Day to day? Creative outlets? No one cares. Same in public. You almost tripped? You need to throw something away? You fumbled your words? No one cares. Believe me, they’re all worried about so much more than you. Social media isn’t real. No one’s analyzing your behavior. Live. Don’t preform.
#tumblr and discord are the only things I like anymore#everything else can go choke#can you tell what type of mood I’m in#also I’m not talking about people who like run a business#if it’s your job then obviously yeah advertise and get your money#g.txt#stop performing#the social media post
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I am in a truly terrible mood folks, so I’m gonna practice some self care and head off early. wouldn’t be surprised if I’m pretty lowkey until the weekend, but you can always hmu on discord if you need me!
#work is kicking my ass and I have to be up early the next two days for appointment stuff and I’m. AAAAAAA#LET ME REST!!!!#ooc.#anyway. I’m gonna go bc I’m in one of those ‘grump about everything’ moods and I don’t wanna bring that energy to the dash#ily all! stay safe do good
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In light of all the horrid stuff going on in this country lately, I would just like to remind everyone that england isn’t a totally terrible place!!
This country is full of beautiful architecture, art, literature, and natural beauties that are sometimes hard to believe are real.
This is the Major Oak of Sherwood Forest, and is estimated to be as much as 1100 years old!! It is estimated at 23 tons, and is 33 feet in girth/10 metres. According to local folklore, it is the tree where Robin Hood and his merry men slept when in the forest.
This is Durdle Door, in Dorset. It’s a natural limestone formation on the jurrassic coast, which was deemed “of such international geographic importance” that it was England’s first foray natural World Heritage site with UNESCO in 2001, joining the Grand Canyon and the Great Barrier Reef (visit-dorset.com)
As for architecture, we have the iconic Highclere Castle
Most well known for its use in iconic historical drama Downton Abbey, first written records of the Highclere estate date back to the year 749 when the estate was granted to the bishops of Winchester. In the late 14th century the bishop of Winchester William of Wykeham built himself a palace on the property, and was taken by Edward VI during the reformation in 1551. It was then granted to the Fitzwilliam family, rebuilt in 1679 by then owner Sir Robert Sawyer, who then bequeathed it to his daughter Margaret, first wife to the 8th earl of Pembroke, Thomas herbert, and it remains in the hands of the Herbert family to date, albeit the branch that resulted in the current Earl of Carnarvon. It was redesigned in the years 1842-49 to the facade we know today. (Quick side note, I am directly related to the herbert family through my great grandfather, so carnarvon I’m coming for you watch out)
We also have of course, the ever iconic Chatsworth house
IYKYK. Jk this incredible house is most well known for its use as Pemberley, the Derbyshire residence of Mr Darcy in the 2005 production of Pride and Prejudice (the best film ever made thank you very much).
The Manor of Chetesuorde is listed in the Domesday Book of 1086 as property of the crown in the custody of William de Peverel. Chatsworth ceased to be a large estate until the 15th century when it was purchased by the Leche family. They enclosed the first park and built a house on what is now the south east part of the gardens. The lands were sold in 1549 to Sir William Cavendish, husband of Bess of Hardwick (who was the “keeper” of Mary Queen of Scots while imprisoned. Also apparently her grandson married ANOTHER of my ancestors so I’m related to her too?? What the fuck I need to stop learning family history on the fly). Bess began to build her own home on the property from 1553 to the 1560s.
The home was renovated a truly mindboggling amount of times, as is the amount of times it changed hands. So I’ll keep it simple. A great number of important changes were made by the 4th duke of Devonshire, greatly changing the layout of the home. His son would marry Georgiana Spencer, 4 times great aunt of princess Diana (and YET ANOTHER RELATIVE OF MINE! From another branch of the family!! I need to call my mother. And update my ancestry.com).
In 1811 the 6th duke of Devonshire inherited Chatsworth, and proceeded to transform it into the wonderful beacon of regency romance we know and adore today over the course of his stewardship over the property.
These are only four incredible natural and historical landmarks in England. There are so many more that I could spend 3 life times researching!! (And so many more that have nothing to do with my family history, I promise. Swear I wasn’t doing this on purpose lmao)
This country can be a fucking nightmare, but it’s also a beautiful country with incredible sights and history, and I think we do ourselves a disservice when we forget that. It’s okay to love England (I fucking adore this country you have no idea, wouldn’t be running a blog if I didn’t!), you aren’t a bad person or supporting the bad shit we’ve done if you are proud of being English.
Because don’t get me wrong this country has perpetrated some of the worst shit in history, but we’ve also contributed some of the most important literature and scientific discoveries ever!!
Mary Anning revolutionised the field of paleontology!! Mary Shelley started the entire sci fi genre. Steven hawkin, Charles Darwin, Dorothy Hodgkin and Rosalind franklin discovered DNA! Isaac Newton, William Blake, John Keats, Byron, Alan Turing, Branwell, Charlotte, Emily, and Anne bronte, Dante Gabriel Rossetti, John Everett Millais, John William Waterhouse, to name a few merely off the top of my head!
England can be a wonderful place, and our heritage can be incredible and a legacy to be truly proud of. It would not do to forget, however, that a lot of our history would not have been possible without queer and ethnic minority groups. We all know a good deal of English wealth came from the slave trade, female scientists and artists often had credit for their work stripped from them and given to husbands or even strangers, and a good number of our most influential scientists and artists were very notably queer who were treated incredibly poorly and sometimes killed, and these are facts that can and do exist simultaneously.
Our heritage is wonderful, but it is still being made today. Things that we do now will be landmark events for our descendants, and it is our duty to do better for this country than our ancestors.
#long ass post sorry#I’m In A Mood today#apologies for the absolutely bizarre turn into my family history I genuinely did not expect to be related to like everyone involved in this#i severely underestimated how intertwined the nobility is#I would love to chat with anyone about some fascinating bits of English history they know and am happy to elaborate on anything I possibly#can!#politics#english history#chatsworth house#highclere castle#dorset#sherwood forest#english culture#trans rights#durdle door#can’t tag everything or I’ll be here all day#Admin Roe
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Glad you're back and relieved you're okay! How're you feeling about time and tide these days?
Here’s a little bit of the next chapter of time&tide that I wrote in the airport a few days ago!
(Anakin is not doing gr8 rn)
The room is untouched, and Anakin is ruined. It’s so—it’s so unfair. Anakin is shattered in a way time will never fix, in a way time has only made worse, and the fucking room looks pristine, like Anakin had never—like nothing had—like it was all—
It takes hours to struggle to his feet, and he isn’t sure he’ll be able to hold his own weight until he’s already vertical.
It’s not fair that the room is spotless, everything in its space, everything neat and where it belongs and Anakin has lost the only place he’s ever belonged.
Lifting the holocron nearest to him is hard. It takes minutes to convince his fingers to unwrap from the fist they’ve formed and then to grip the edges of the disc and raise it off its rest.
Anakin, don’t, a voice that sounds somehow as weary as his master and as scandalized as his lover murmurs in his ear, but both men are dead. Both men are gone.
The shattering of the holocron against the floor is louder than the whisper of a ghost.
It’s easier to lift the second; it feels right to throw it as hard as he can and watch it break as well.
It feels good to destroy, and it feels even better to look at the wreckage and know he caused it. The next person who steps into this room will be able to tell with just one look that something has happened, that something terrible has happened.
#asks#t&t#so there’s a couple of things making it difficult to type :<#the chapter begins with anakin by himself and everything is just long paragraphs in his mind#like very introspective grief and darkness and going back and forth in dark thoughts#and I never knew how much I liked writing dialogue until I can’t :(#so it’s just pushing through the parts where it’s just anakin and his thoughts and his flashbacks to get to the scene we’re all wanting#and then also I’m in a light and humor writing mood (see the sugar daddy au fic)#so I’m trying to ramp tht down to get in the mood to write t&t and Vowbreaker#so next fic update is gonna be a bit more serious and then we’ll walk it down to get into the weeds about anakins grief
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I always forget just how many love songs I have in my playlist until I’m having an ultra-love-repulsed day and have to try my best to contain my breakdown until I get home
#21 out of 61 songs are related to love in some way#and it always feels like my playlist is trying to give me as many in a row as it can#must’ve gotten like 5 one after the other while walking home today#it’s too much of a hassle to keep taking my phone out of my backpack to switch songs so I just grit my teeth and bear it#and I know my playlist literally can’t read my mood. it’s not sentient. it’s a program#but when I’m so strung out it really does feel like it’s doing it on purpose#and hearing those songs makes everything so much worse#days like these I cannot stand any mention of love or romance or sex or anything else of the sort#I can’t read or think about it without feeling awful#can’t draw can’t write can’t watch shows. nothing#worst thing is I never know when I’ll be having a day like this so I can’t prepare by isolating myself or anything#like preparing a separate playlist with no love songs#bc the only way to find out is to get triggered#which… isn’t something I particularly like doing. at all#and I can’t even indulge in my latest interests because guess fucking what it centres around#ughhhhhhhhh. why couldn’t I have just stayed bi and not have to deal with any of this
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Today is good I think. My brain isn’t fully happy my body isn’t fully happy but I’m treating myself kindly anyways
#I hate you chemical imbalance in my brain everything is going so incredible and I’m still not happy I’m only content#I picked up weed went for a drive hung out with my mom swam in the pool sat in the sun took a warm shower got high#I think I might journal or read for a bit maybe do a face mask while I read and smoke#watching Rick and morty also counts as self care I think. season three specifically is self care. I know pretty much all the words I’m just#mouthing along the entire epsidoe it’s heavenly#I think I might paint my nails too hmm am I feeling masculine enough to present fem recently. thank you buzzcut I love you buzzcut#I also did my eyeliner today and wore my cute earrings#did I post pocket joe on my dash. I think I forgot him there and he’s gonna be in the car all weekend in an airport parking lot lmao whoops#sorry pocket joe. I’m watching pickle rick epsidoe it’s so good. it’s beautiful out today even tho it’s sunny and I don’t think I’m burnt so#that’s incredible and then also when I took my warm shower I used my body scrub I haven’t used in like months and now my arms and legs feel#super soft it’s fantastic I am in a good mood today I just have to think really hard to actually feel it bc I have a headache and cramps#(still. not. fucking. bleeding. ANGRY.)#and I’m still sad about my middle school teacher dieing but I’m trying not to think about it so it’s fine
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I am here to fully encourage the Christmas movie au
The third act breakup happens. Tis the damn season by Taylor Swift starts playing
Also it needs a lot of cheese hollydays cliches like snow angles and hot chocho or something
Just so you know, I am now more obsessed with this au than ever and it’s entirely your and @deadlycupid ‘s fault (saying that very affectionately but also how dare you)
Anyways.
First off, I’m really here for the Taylor Swift song playing. Actually, another song of hers, Christmas Tree Farm, would be perfect for this au and you’ll see why.
(I’m still working on plot details and making everything make sense, but the basic storyline is set.)
So Talon is our typical business man from a big city, working for his father’s company. Also, his family is literally rich.
And Talon for some business reasons gets send to one of those small towns that are very much obsessed with Christmas. And he’s not happy about it.
It’s cold, it’s in the middle of nowhere and he’s not really the Christmas type of guy anymore, since he and his dad are always busy with the business.
So at first he’s not really thrilled and he keeps complaining to Halea (who here is his best friend) over the phone all the time. And then he (quite literally) runs into Aiden.
Aiden is a true small town boy and works at - you guessed it - the local Christmas tree farm, which is the pride of the city. (He most likely even owns this place, idk yet.) He’s very helpful and pretty beloved by the people.
Him and Talon do not have a good start though, their meeting ends with them bickering and Talon being as annoyed as ever.
The next day Talon seeks out a Café. Coincidentally, Aiden is also there. He helps out at the Café that belongs to his best friend (Maya) whenever things get busy around Christmas.
Nice guy that he is he apologizes to Talon about the day before by giving him a free drink and the two settle on starting anew.
That’s when the whole plot line of getting to know each other starts. Aiden shows him around town and Talon visits the farm and the two get closer.
Aiden is set on showing Talon how wonderful Christmas can be and Talon starts to grow pretty fond of it - and pretty fond of Aiden too.
Which already leads to obstacle number one: Talon (with a little help of Halea) realizes he has a crush on Aiden, but he is convinced that Aiden is dating Maya (even though he’s obviously not).
This misunderstanding gets solved after a while though and the two kiss. And things go great from there on. Until we reach obstacle number two.
Now this is not completely worked out yet, but I had the following idea (that just needs to be molded a bit):
So I was thinking that maybe Aiden’s family (or his boss if they wouldn’t own the farm) is at risk of losing their farm land, be it cause of a lack of money/some debt or just someone wanting to bully them off of the land.
And Talon’s family company is involved in that. Actually, Talon was send there specifically to get Aiden’s family to sell the property, one way or another.
And one day shortly before Christmas Aiden finds out about it and thinks Talon only used him, so that’s when the third act breakup you mentioned happens.
Aiden doesn’t want to see him anymore and so Talon (almost?) leaves. But something holds him back and he decided to chase after Aiden, convincing him that he wasn’t using him.
They make up but there’s still the problem with Aiden losing the farm. So Talon steps in, helping him out. In the end he ends up buying the farm himself, so that Aiden can stay. Aiden wants to pay him back eventually and Talon agrees to that to not hurt his pride (it ends up not being a problem anymore though cause years after he story they get married anyway)
And then they can celebrate Christmas on the farm and everyone is happy! And Talon of course has to come visit from time to time to be with his boyfriend “check if Aiden is looking after the farm correctly”
THE END (not the end of this ask tho cause I have more ideas to share)
Cute and cheesy Christmas movie/romance movie ideas for the story (in no particular order):
Aiden playing in the snow with children from the town
him and Talon getting dragged into/having a snowball fight
little Christmas market in the town and at the Christmas tree farm
drinking hot cider/hot chocolate like all the time
baking cookies escalating into a flour battle
feeding each other chocolate
talking about how they used to celebrate Christmas with their family and getting sad about things but being like they used to
Talon running into Aiden and Maya being overly affectionate or comforting one another and thinking “oh they definitely date”
Talon seeing Aiden chop wood and running straight into a Christmas tree
Aiden helping a little kid finding their ideal tree for Christmas being all sweet to them
Aiden showing Talon around town
it’s starting to snow in a very romantic coded moment
Talon getting talked into singing for some people from the village after they find out he’s got musical talent
of course decorating the Christmas tree
also at least one mistletoe scene I bet
“fairy lights make you look even more pretty”
One of them slipping on snow or something and the other catching him
ice skating maybe?
Christmas dinner. Also Aiden cooking for Talon cause he’s a godly cook
Feel free to add on if you want xD
But yeah that’s it do far. Already pretty cliche and cheesy but that’s how I intend it to be. Absolutely in love with this.
#nothing better to get in the Christmas mood than creating my own hallmark movie with my fave ship#this is everything to me now I will think about it the whole rest of the year#I’m gonna make this as cheesy as possible and no one scan stop me#I am insane about this now I hope you guys are happy#writer speaks#writeblr#wip: the knights of the alder#Christmas romance movie au
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Me watching lesbian women and bisexual women go at each other online
#I’m tired man#I’m so unbelievably over discourse#let me lick 🐱 in peace I swear to god#meet in the middle please#yes some bisexual women are lesbianphobic#yes some lesbians are biphobic#you meet any group of any type of people anywhere in the world and there will be people in that Group who are mean to people in another#group#I’m so tired though#it genuinely makes me hate myself and being lesbian so much because I’m just OVER it I’m so sick of seeing it everywhere all the time#I want to be straight and ignorant so I don’t have to deal with it lol#I know given everything that’s going on I’m just very sensitive and in a horrible mood#because everything feels horrible right now#but still oh my gosh#it’s like watching two rabid dogs just go at each other#so much anger and violence and I’m over it#I just want to find a wife and ditch the whole lgbt community as a whole so I don’t have to see or hear about another piece of discourse#for as long as I live - and even that won’t be soon enough lol
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Theresa: Time for plan G.
Kiana: Don’t you mean plan B?
Theresa: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.
Mei: What about plan D?
Theresa: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.
Kiana: What about plan E?
Theresa: I’m hoping not to use it. Otto dies in plan E.
Kiana: I like plan E.
Mei: Let’s do plan E.
Theresa:…
#fukimei#theresa apocalypse#kiana kaslana#raiden mei#honkai 3rd#kiana and mei are still salty about what he did to hua#otto gave kiana ptsd#otto has both emotionally and mentally destroyed kiana#i wanna drop kick otto#otto deserve to get punched#otto traumatized both kiana and hua#everything that happened was otto's fault#i’m still salty#what did you expect theresa?#kiana continues to be a mood#mei continues to be a mood#mei and kiana are both idiots but they’re hua's idiots
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