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brilliant-red-eternity · 8 months

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Psycho-Pass Providence:

my attempt to write a movie review.

I finally went to the movies and watched Psycho-Pass Providence with a friend last Tuesday. I knew the film would be packed with plot and action so we decided to see the German dubbed version. We just wanted to have a good time, and some nachos with cheese dip and beer. The cinema was maybe a quarter full which I don’t think is too bad for a weekday. There even was a girl cosplaying as Akane. I was pretty nervous the whole day. After reading so many negative reviews on Tumblr over the past few months, I prepared myself for the worst. Will Providence ruin this series for me? Is Shinkane dead? My friend encouraged me by saying, “watch the movie and form your own opinion”, and that’s what I did!

Providence is a diffuse colossus of a story but I liked it much better than PP3. The story is very action-heavy and plot-driven. You can feel the absence of Urobuchi’s writing because relatively little emphasis is placed on the emotions of the characters or their development. The dialogues are rather short and the action scenes quite long. Explosions and battles largely replace social criticism. Precious moments are few and far between. I think Ubukata came up with a really cool and offbeat plot, it’s just way too big for one movie. He should have made Providence into a series with many episodes, but that’s just my opinion. I can’t shake the feeling that he simply placed the characters into his massive plot as if they were chess pieces. Everyone does their job. They rush from one action to the next. Saiga is dead. On it goes. Akira is dead. There are no breaks. The ending is also very rushed and if I hadn’t already known why Akane shoots chief Kasei, I probably would have left the cinema with a massive question mark.

The Shinkane content in Providence is quite nice. And to say it right away: yes, I saw their hands touch in that bridal carry scene. It was very clear and less rushed than I thought. I’m just not sure if their fingers were intertwined or if Kogami had his fingers around Akane’s hand squeezing it. The phone call was also funny. My friend just sighed in her seat next to me and said a little too loudly: “I can’t believe Akane is in love with this clumsy idiot! Why can’t he just apologize?” Yeah, why? Akane hung up the phone and her face was so adorable. The romantic comedy was only perfect when Saiga cheered Kogami on in the elevator afterwards (“Come on, make an effort!”) and Ko acted like a petulant child (“I don’t know what you mean!”). Really, Ko? You were playing dumb in front of sensei? Was Kogami embarrassed that his former teacher was interfering in their relationship? However, these two were in dire need of counselling that’s why I found the idea of Saiga acting as their therapist quite entertaining.

I still don’t know what to make of Shinkane in Providence. I have too many thoughts and feelings, that’s why I’d like to deal with this topic separately in another post. Shinkane is not dead at all, but it hasn’t evolved either. Each of them basically does their own thing when it comes to work and I can’t shake the impression that Akane would have found Kogami rather unsexy if she had met him for the first time in PPP. I love Kogami, but he doesn’t contribute much to the story except that he saves Akane’s life in the end.

Now that I’ve seen the film, it sounds more than absurd to claim that they have no other relationship than a collegial working relationship. I mean, it’s obviously not work or a shared conviction that ties them together and makes Akane answer the phone late at night, but their old acquaintance. They have an unresolved personal conflict between them, and a wide range of unexplored emotions. All the social awkwardness fits in with that. And the creators even went one step further with the romantic scenes:

I already knew about the scene in which Kogami jumps on top of Akane (and between her legs) to protect her from an explosion but I didn’t expect the whole thing to play out in slow motion. Holy shit! My heart leapt. I mean, what am I looking at here if not a romantic subplot? You can see every detail crisp and clear: how his hands are embracing and protecting her head from the impact, how their bodies stick together rather indecently. And Akane and Ko don’t immediately get up and run, no. They stay put for the time being looking at each other and then Ko states the obvious like a brain dead fool: “It’s a dangerous place, we should retreat.”

Yeah, well… who would have thought that explosions and shootings would be dangerous? Kogami’s blood must have gone from his brain to some other part of his body, there’s no other way to explain this level of silliness. We’ve already seen Kogami protecting Akane from an explosion before. He threw her like a sack of potatoes in the movie but THIS is something else entirely. THIS is screaming “You’re the most precious person on earth to me”. Same goes for the bridal carry. The scene isn’t as rushed as their encounter in the wheat field, no. The animators kind of savour their last scene in Providence and you have to be wilfully blind to not notice Kogami’s affection for Akane or their touching hands.

I can understand the widespread criticism of Kogami’s strange behaviour in PPP. It’s not quite what I expected either, but I didn’t expect anything else. Sounds crazy, huh? I know. I don’t know if Ubukata’s writing style is to blame for Ko’s derailment. I guess the writers deliberately wanted to create some tension in the form of personal conflict which is a common and cheap trick that can also be found in romantic YA literature.

It is nevertheless credible to a certain extend. Kogami has returned to a world with a wall between latent criminals and citizens with healthy Psycho-Passes. Social conventions are a corset. They make us act differently. The fact that he doesn’t hit on Akane actually says a lot of good things about his character. He knows nothing about her life, except that it hasn’t gone down the drain yet. What role does he still play in Akane’s life? Does she even need his help? When you look at Kogami’s issue with addressing Akane properly, it becomes clear that he’s uncertain: kanshikan, omae, anta, yo. Akane has already gathered a team around her and Kogami is standing outside the door. He’s the odd man out. He’s also an incorrigible idiot who doesn’t have it in him to apologize.

They give each other nothing at first. That’s why I like the scene in the hospital so much because it changes their relationship for good. Akane’s visit is proof to Kogami that he is important to her. She cares about his health and she even takes the cigarette from his mouth. Akane also invites him to join her team (“We’re a team, right?”) and you can see the relief on Kogami’s face. After that, their interactions become lighter and more honest. Team PSB and Team SAD no longer go separate ways.

I really like the camaraderie between Kogami and Frederika. I found them both very independent in their work, which led me to ask whether Frederika is his boss at all. I read somewhere that they both have the same rank of “special investigator” which also fits in well with the way they talk to each other. I remember Akane asking Kogami during their phone call what Yabuki thought of his past actions. I guess that makes Shogo Yabuki his boss and Frederika his senpai? There was one thing that annoyed me, though, and that was that Frederika did everything her boss Yabuki told her to do. She even kept it a secret from Kogami that they were using Saiga as bait. Why didn’t she say “no” for once?

Providence has a few highlights that I just can’t leave unmentioned. It isn’t the best film, but it’s also not as bad as many have made it out to be. The scene in which Gino grabs Kogami by the collar, calls him an asshole and pushes him roughly against the glass pane of the office was quite the cliché. It could have come straight from a fan fic. Kogami remains calm and I don’t find him arrogant. Sugo tries to intervene, but I had the impression that it’s primarily Akane’s staged indifference towards Kogami that keeps Gino from exploding with rage. Gino pulls himself together the moment he sees Akane entering the office. If there’s one thing I love about their dynamics, it’s how they always try to protect each other in the most subtle but effective way. Gino is like the big brother we all want to have. He is by Akane’s side after Saiga dies and he reminds Kogami of the duty to not let Akane become a latent criminal. I can’t say often enough how much I adore Ginoza and his loyalty to Akane.

But Gino does not only protect Akane, he also saves Frederika’s life twice. These two have a little scene in Providence that I find cute. Standing amidst the ruins of the building after the battle, Gino asks Frederika how she is. She says “not too bad” while stroking her hair almost sheepishly like a schoolgirl. Is it the first time that a colleague asks Frederika about her well-being? Is this how things are at the SAD? I never saw Kogami turn around to look at her, even though she always saves his stupid ass from getting kicked. And her boss Yabuki only ever entrusted her with the most dangerous missions (aka “dirty work in the name of justice”). It really sucks to be a strong woman sometimes. It sucks when performance is always expected without complaint. That’s why it’s all the more refreshing when a hot guy like Gino asks if you’re still alive, right Frederika?

Overall, it was very cool to see Frederika on the battlefield since she’s quite capable and knows how to handle weapons. I didn’t like her passive role in PP3, where she just sat in her neat little office and gave orders. PP is kind of understaffed in terms of female characters so it was good to see Frederika having a more active role this time. I hope that in the future they will give her a backstory. It’s more the personal things that make a character interesting for me. I mean, what was her relationship with Yabuki? She shed a tear after his death, or was this just an optical illusion?

There was nothing to complain about the quality of the animation in Providence. It was first class. The wedding was beautiful and I really liked the colours and fireworks of the Chinese New Year festival in the streets of Dejima. It made a nice contrast to the gloomy dark dystopian world of Sibyl. The Chinese New Year also brings me directly to the scene that, oddly enough, touched me the most: Akira’s death. Atsushi Shindou shoots him on the roof of the MoFA as the fireworks go off and with his last words Akira says, “Take care of Kei, I want him to have a different life than mine.” It was a beautiful but also very sad moment. There were many deaths in the film but the pace of the story was way too fast for me to mourn them properly. It’s a shame, especially since most of the time was spent on action scenes. I don’t know how many minutes I watched Sugo trying to shoot a satellite out of the sky with his drone.

Saiga’s death is tragic but it has great influence on Akane. In the end, his last words (“justice and truth are multifaceted”) encourage her to stand up for her convictions and turn against Sibyl in order to uphold the law. I noticed that Saiga is already very tired at the beginning of Providence, as if he no longer expects anything great from life and prefers to pass the baton to the younger generation. Perhaps that is also why he tries to persuade Kogami to bury the hatchet with Akane. “You should apologize to her. Take this advice from an old man like me.” It seems that he wanted to leave the world in peace, knowing that he has given his students all he could give. So from that point of view, his passing is dignified. His hands are even folded and placed on top of his chest after he dies. I couldn’t help but think that it is meant as a religious gesture: that he will be accepted by God if not by Sibyl.

Sibyl is as disgusting as ever and that’s all there is to say. Their hypocrisy is simply unbearable. And then no one has the courage to stand up for the preservation of the rule of law – least of all the Ministry of Justice. What a joke! We also learn that it’s totally fine for Sibyl to give absolution and sovereignty to a group of criminals (the Peacebreakers) as long as they come from their own criminal ranks. Well, one crow does not peck out another crow’s eye, right? I don’t know whether Atsushi Shindou could be trusted or not, although he has pulled some important strings in the background. The old man seemed weary just like Saiga, but he thought very highly of Akane and campaigned for her in front of Sibyl which made him likeable in my eyes. He was also a good mentor.

I must not forget to mention the true antagonists of the story, first and foremost Tonami the White. He is the leader of the Peacebreakers, a group of former soldiers and mercenaries of Sibyl who see themselves in the tradition of a cult. They worship a similar AI like Sibyl that also has wired brains in boxes and they see it as their God and commander. The cult did seem rather bizarre and fantastic sometimes, but I got the impression that this is exactly Ubukata’s style.

Tonami is a despicable man. He tells Akane that despite his old age, he can still take on a young girl like her, then he draws a gun and starts to shoot her. Congratulations, man! She’s unarmed, and pulling a trigger is really not much of a feat. Asshole! He was clearly afraid that Akane would be superior in a fistfight.

I remember a heated debate on social media about whether Kogami should have killed Tonami or not. Well, I would argue that he had no choice but to shoot this man if he wanted to make sure Akane got out of there alive (“Protect Tsunemori!”). Akane looks relieved when she sees Kogami. She smiles at him as if she knows that her life is safe from now on. But then she continues to provoke Tonami with her words. The man points a damn gun to her head and she has already been shot twice and lies bleeding on the floor in handcuffs. Should Kogami twiddle his thumbs and wait to see what happens? Well, he does. But only for a moment.

Kogami’s face is empty while Akane is being tortured. It’s devoid of emotion, not even anger shows on his face. I was like: huh? I first thought it was bad animation or some artificial intervention to evade romance and keep the Kouakas from losing their minds, but in retrospect, it occurred to me that perhaps… Kogami is simply listening to the conversation in front of him? Akane and Tonami are talking about the Sibyl System and it’s true nature. They are talking about AI vs. humanity. They are talking about integrating this other AI into Sibyl and the boxes with the brains are standing just a few meters away from them. Snippets and fragments, but Kogami isn’t stupid. It was him who found a decapitated professor Stronskaya on the ship. Her head was taken away by the Peacebreakers and we later learn that her brain was put into a box for their AI. Kogami has been wondering for a while what kind of influence Akane has on the system. And even Tonami (who calls her “a witch that disturbs the social order”) is kind of astounded at what Akane knows and what she is capable of.

Kogami agrees with Tonami and then shoots him in the head. I really don’t know which part he agrees with. I can only explain it by saying that, unlike Akane, Kogami has lost faith in humanity. Kogami knows what humans are capable of and that they are easily corrupted. But he believes in Akane, so there’s that. It’s only natural that he would save her at any cost.

I didn’t perceive Akane as angry though. She knows Kogami well enough and wanted him to come with her on the mission. Kogami “breaking the law again” certainly saddens and disappoints her, but I don’t think she necessarily wants to enforce him. Atsushi Shindou shot Akira in front of Akane and she didn’t arrest him. If she were now to arrest Kogami, she would have double standards. I remember director Shiotani saying in an interview that Kogami voluntarily let Akane arrest him. Well, that actually sounds quite logical to me because I honestly don’t see Akane taking the initiative. But Kogami acting like a repentant little puppy in front of Akane, the “goddess and bodhisattva” he expects to make the world a better place? Yes, I can very well imagine that – only that at this point she is just a bleeding human being in his arms.

Akane’s incident was… wow. I knew what she was up to beforehand, but I still found the whole thing quite mind-boggling. Where did Akane get the gun she shot chief Kasei with? Everyone was looking forward to her inauguration. Gino, Sugo, Shion and Yayoi… they were watching it on TV. What has my girl done?

I wouldn’t go so far as to blame Kogami. There is a trend right now to make him the scapegoat for everything that happens to Akane, but somehow that is not right and would completely undermine Akane’s independence. There is no guarantee that the arrest and prosecution of Tonami would have worked. Sibyl is not a reliable negotiating partner. I think Akane chose a more effective way by immediately involving the public and getting them to discuss the preservation of the law. At least, it worked. But why the letter to Kogami? It wasn’t a tit-for-tat response. I think Akane wanted to say goodbye. She didn’t know what would happen to her or whether they would see each other again. These two threw their lives away and stood up for their beliefs in justice. Was it brave or was it foolish? Who knows. But the closing of a circle was pretty well executed by the creators of the series in my opinion.

I still have no clue why Kogami was released from confinement. I can only speculate that MoFA has negotiated a deal. I also remember that his Psycho-Pass was encrypted in PP3 and no longer accessible via Sibyl’s dominator. There is a strong competition between the ministries and certainly no help can be expected from Sibyl. Mika had to literally beg chief Kasei to allow her to send out a rescue mission for Akane who was already classified as a traitor because she went to take on the Peacebreakers on her own. Why would they let Kogami go, the traitor who killed a criminal pardoned by Sibyl in order to rescue the traitor Akane? No. He was released at the behest of MoFA. It is therefore not surprising that Akane has arranged the transfer of Gino and Sugo to MoFA. Nothing bothers Sibyl more than loyal dogs and I’m certain that these two would have been thrown into the isolation facility the moment Akane lost her position as inspector.

Okay, I’ll stop rambling now. I’d like to end this post with a quote from the friend who went with me to the movies. We saw Psycho-Pass together five years ago and I was very curious to hear her opinion. We both agreed that Akane's performance in Providence is once again superb. She’s a queen. One of the best female characters of all time. What she said about Kogami may irritate some but I can only agree: “It wasn’t his most mature performance, but in the end he could be relied upon!”

Providence was fun. It was okay. It wasn’t Psycho-Pass at its best but at least, it answered the question that has been on my mind for almost four years: what did Akane do that landed her in prison?

#psycho pass #psycho pass providence #akane tsunemori #shinya kougami #shinkane #ramblings #review

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fawrishfish · 9 months

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Coming soon merch!!!

I’ve never used Vograce before, so I wanted to test it out before I buy my merch for realzies.

(Also, I want to change some of the designs that are gonna be in the store)

I tested out the pins with my old design for Saul Goodman, and I really like how vibrant the colors came out!

I tested out the keychains with a design for Paranormal inc. and my comic Storm Chasers and they look adorable!!

Ive gotta save up money so I could order stuff for the store

I calculated how much I’d need to start production

(…nice…)

The store is going to have

10 sticker designs(unless I want some of them to be pins)

2 SPECIAL sticker designs(holographic)

and 2 keychain designs(Lalo and Nacho!!)

I’ll share designs I’ve made in a future post!

#better call saul #digital aritst #saul goodman #jimmy mcgill #my webcomic

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tiger-is-a-certified-idiot · 1 year

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I saw the 2:00 performance of Beetlejuice yesterday (December 30th) with Elliott Mattox as Beetlejuice and Dana Steingold as Lydia and I figured I’d document whatever differences I remember or that I found notable for those interested!

Mattox opened The Whole Being Dead Thing with the “Hey folks, ain’t it pretty! Guess who’s here in New York City?” lyrics

During the puppet show joke, Elliott pointed to a kid in the audience and said “wow! Really young. Interesting choice, parents!”

Mattox did add the “shit” after “Jesus I can’t spell”

He also said “and that is how I got herpes from Katherine Hepburn” instead of “made nachos”

Mattox sung the word “Helpless” (Hamilton reference) The crowd loved that. He didn’t say “skeeewp” during “Here’s help, here’s you… it’s less”

Leslie used “sadness is like a third nipple, no one wants to see it, but it’s a part of you” instead of the kale salad joke.

Dana took some extra pictures of Delia during No Reason and Leslie said “No paparazzi!” Instead of “Unicorns are scary!”

Dana had Lydia tell the Maitlands “you look like you run a failing coffee shop” and Adam says “I always wanted to run a failing coffee shop!” (I can’t remember if this is normally part of the script or not but I found it funny)

Elliott only has one Beetlejuice wig, so instead of “why is your hair purple” he said “why is your hair GREEN”

He also didn’t get red hair during his reappearance

Every magic trick worked! Including setting the suicide note on fire!

Since I haven’t seen it in any Slime, I feel like I should point out the light up game show sign above the stage that says “Life or Death” and turns into “Till <3 Death” during Creepy Old Guy

Instead of “Beetlejuice” David has Adam call BJ “Mr Juice” in a sort of angry/semi sarcastic Adam voice during the “you have touched me and harassed me and groped me” part, which was really funny.

The only-one-wig problem came back in the funniest way during Creepy Old Guy, the barber equipment fell away to reveal…the exact same hair as before (lmao)

Adam Dannheisser did an amazing job during the break in Home, he fake cried his lines and it was really raw and emotional. Dana did an incredible job performing the rest of the song as well.

Beetlejuice calls Delia “Jessica” instead of “Delilah” when saying his goodbyes

And then what you’ve all been waiting for: when making his final exit, carried by his clones, Mattox did the Defying Gravity riff and the crowd went MENTAL. It was AWESOME.

Everything else went off without a hitch! (If you ignore “Might not live till Tris-er, Christmas. ChoketodeathonTriscuits” (nice save, buddy)

Overall 10/10

Everyone did FANTASTIC and I’m so so stoked to have gotten to see the show before it closes.

And of course, if anyone saw the show and caught something I missed, please add on. I’m only one pair of eyes lmao.

#Beetlejuice #bjtm #bjtmtmtm #beetlejuice the musical #elliott mattox #mattoxjuice #dana steingold

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litres-of-cocaine · 11 months

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what’s so awesome about the early episodes of better call saul - i’m talking before chuck has his ‘you’re not a real lawyer speech’ - is how painstaking jimmy’s love for his brother is. it’s obvious how great an actor bob odenkirk just from…. everything aha but. hmmmm. hmmmm!

even before it becomes completely transparent how chuck feels about him, the way jimmy looks at him is devastating. and i don’t mean because we already know how the story turns out from brba, because even if we are looking at it completely isolated from context, jimmy’s care for chuck feels almost like grief. there are lots of ways to communicate love across media in joy or happiness or whatever but i think what makes the way BCS shows what jimmy feels for his brother so unique is that jimmy’s love is conveyed through sadness anytime he looks at chuck.

there are two types of looks/interactions i would categorise this presentation of love:

a) the caregiving kind - it’s jimmy in the hospital, jimmy leading chuck out the door of his house to hhm; the kind where this view of what was compared to what is sits so stark against everything else. it’s like anytime someone’s loved one is suffering, like this failing desperation to help.

b) the ache - this desire jimmy has to not be viewed as a ‘scumbag’, basically beyond slippin’ jimmy. it’s him telling chuck he passed the bar and having to ask if he’s proud because his brother won’t say it at first. jimmy is yearning for his brother to think highly of him and even if chuck did what makes the way jimmy responds to him in these situations so goddamn sad is the way it illustrates how low his self esteem is. he needs chuck to encourage him and tell him he’s good otherwise suddenly all his worst fears about himself are just bam correct in his mind.

and like if we compare these showcases of feelings to the flashback of jimmy in custody after his chicago sunroof incident i would argue that we *don’t* see this kind of display. like here he’s interested in escaping the charges and he wants chuck to help him, yes, there’s the underlying tensions of chuck being successful in a way that jimmy decidedly isn’t but this crushing desire to be better at all costs doesn’t appear here. it’s not in the scene where we see a flashback scam play out or barely at all when jimmy has *just* got off his charge and is heading to new mexico.

chuck’s urgency for jimmy to quit his scams and be better is what crushes any positive idea jimmy has of himself (granted if we’re speaking morally - which we aren’t bcs this is fictitious but still - is a societal improvement as he was a con artist) and then his refusal to validate any progress he makes just pushes him down further and further. but jimmy loves him for it anyway. jimmy genuinely wants to be good, he wants so so so much to be a good lawyer and a good person and *like chuck*. he returns the kettleman’s money, warns them about nacho, and actually wants to advocate and help (in exchange for payment ofc, he is a lawyer) for the elderly people he works with.

like he’s viewing his brother as like this redemptive figure for him to a certain extent as he’s realised that he wasn’t a good person before. but chuck ‘saving’ him does make him a better person but just makes him feel crap about himself.

jimmy’s love for his brother is folded over and over and over again and seems so genuine and sincere so that watching chuck’s kind of dispassionate coldness even in the first episode makes it seem all the more desperate and intense. (you could compare him to the way jesse’s parents act a lil probably)

i’m not suggesting that chuck is like malicious in this or anything, but what he does for jimmy seems wayyy more like obligation than care. like he has an understanding of the familial responsibility he has and what i’d call an objective ‘love’ because of that connection, but that’s it. jimmy, on the other hand, idolises him. jimmy in trying to be a good person is still so far from perfect lmao even with the way he is with chuck but it’s clear that is brother is everything to him. the short (and not very revolutionary) answer lol: jimmy loves chuck more than chuck loves jimmy. and again i’m strictly talking. like. episodes 1-9 here.

and now if we put that -back- in context of breaking bad…..

it’s like a fucking sledgehammer to the chest.

we known that jimmy becomes saul before the program starts. even if someone who hasn’t seen breaking bad is watching BCS chronologically, they are seeing saul after the events of the initial show from the start. it’s clear exactly *what* he ends up as. so we know what saul represents in relation to this ideal of a ‘good’ lawyer.

the cars already crashed, the bomb’s gone off, we are reading jimmy mcgill’s obituary.

this care that jimmy shows for chuck (even after the betrayal yaknow) feels so fucking cataclysmic because of that as not only is he trying so hard and the viewers are seeing from his perspective in the early episodes but. we know that he fails. and we know that chuck, the arsehole who i would say, if not directly causes, at least contributes to jimmy’s negative arc, ends up being right.

#i am going slightly insane with this btw #brba #better call saul #what’s that quote about tragic heroes being dead from the beginning?#anyway #that!#jimmy mcgill #chuck mcgill #all the homies love jimmy mcgill #i do think the relationship is so so interesting tho #and cry worthy so that’s fun

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seraphtrevs · 1 year

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Could you expand on the similarities/parallels between Lalo and Gus? (or link me to a post if you’ve already talked about it) I think it’s fascinating & I’d love to read more

OKAY I'm finally here - every time I've sat down to write it I've been sidetracked

First, let's talk about how they're different. They are polar opposites - orderly/chaotic, serious/playful, cold/hot, cartel outsider/cartel insider, born to poverty/born to wealth. I've kind of convinced myself that Lalo was designed specifically to be Gus's foil.

But like all good foils, they also have a lot in common. Such as:

They're all business. Neither of these men have anything remotely resembling a personal life. I've seen articles on several random pop culture websites that incorrectly say that Gus had Lalo's family killed at his home, but those people were not his family! He' paid them to be there! Because real, honest attachments would be a distraction - and a liability, as Gus learned from personal experience. (And who knows - maybe Lalo learned that lesson, too.) The only thing they have going on in their lives is the Game. When all you do is play a game, you tend to get pretty good at it. Which leads me to #2

They're on the same level. The cartel is not a brain trust. Gus and Lalo are usually the smartest people involved in whatever their latest scheme is, so when they encounter each other, there's a weird moment of recognition - oh hey, this guy is a serious opponent

And since they're both experts in the game they're playing, their trains of thought generally end up at the same destination. I'm sure the way they arrive at their conclusions is very different, which is something I think deeply annoys both of them - like, it's a very specific kind of annoying to have someone you despise come up with the same answer but in the wrong way. It's why they're able to anticipate and interpret each other's actions based only off vibes

They're ruthless. They both have zero qualms about doing whatever it takes to achieve their ends, with seeming little regret. We see Mike, Jesse, and Walt struggle with all the violence and the death, but Gus and Lalo never show regret. They know that sometimes you have to sacrifice pawns to win games, and so that's what they do

They're loners. Neither of them have a single real friend. If you buy my headcanon that Lalo is also gay, it kind of makes sense why he's also kept people at a distance. Neither of them can risk the kind of exposure being truly intimate with someone entails...and honestly, they're both just kind of weird and don't fit in, the way exceptional people don't sometimes.

They don't care much about material things. Neither of them seem particularly interested in a lavish lifestyle, outside of having a nice house and getting the occasional outrageously expensive bottle of alcohol. They don't wear expensive clothes. They don't drive especially flashy cars (compare Lalo's car with Nacho's). They don't throw parties to show off their wealth. Jimmy uses his money to the fullest extent - because what's the point of having it otherwise? But Lalo and Gus don't seem to care about that. Money is just one of your scores when you're playing to win

They're loyal - Gus was fiercely loyal to Max, and Lalo is fiercely loyal to Hector. I think this is related to their loner tendencies - it's rare to find anyone who truly understands them. It's like they take every last scrap of their humanity and invest it in one single person. This is how Lalo figures out that Gus is up to something - he knows that there's no way in hell Gus would ever save Hector's life unless he had an ulterior motive, so he started to look around for other things that didn't make any sense

#i'm sure I'll think of something else the moment I hit post #gustavo fring #lalo salamanca #better call saul #asks

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sergeantsporks · 1 year

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writing request : camilla is working late so luz, amity, willow, gus, and hunter have to cook for themselves

(I sadly had to cut Luz out because she probably would have vetoed some of this nonsense, but everyone else is fair game.)

“Pasta?”

Hunter set the box on the counter. “Check.”

“Vegetarian meatstuff?”

Willow set down tofu. “Check.”

“Filling sauce?”

Amity gingerly waved the mustard bottle up and down. “Are you sure we’re supposed to use this?”

Gus shook his head. “Amity, Amity, Amity. Don’t you trust me?”

“I mean—it’s not that I don’t trust you, I’d just like to know… why?”

“Mustard goes on hot dogs. Ketchup goes on hot dogs. Ketchup is used in ravioli, and ergo, since Mustard and Ketchup are interchangeable as hot dog condiments, obviously they are interchangeable as ravioli ingredients!”

Amity checked the recipe on the box of ravioli. “…This says tomato sauce, not ketchup.”

“Ketchup is tomato, it’s the same thing. Just trust me, Amity. I know what I’m doing.”

“Maybe we should just wait for Camila to get home?”

“She said she’d be late today,” Hunter chimed in, “Besides, she and Vee cook for us a lot. It’s the least we can do to make dinner for them every once in a while.”

“That’s true.” Amity set the bottle of mustard down on the counter, stepping back with her hands up. “Alright, Gus, I trust you. Take it away.”

“Great. Aaaaaaand, cheese!” Gus set a jar of nacho cheese on the counter. “Okay!” He clapped his hands together. “Willow, start chopping up the tofu! Hunter, I need a cup of mustard on the stove cooking with the cheese!”

Hunter and Willow saluted and got to work. Gus turned towards Amity.

“Amity, I need you to preheat the oven to four-hundred degrees!”

“Okay…” Amity turned the oven on. “Now what?”

Gus took the pasta out of the box. “…mmm, it’s a little hard…”

“We could boil it?” Willow suggested.

“But then we have to cook it in the oven! We can’t cook it twice, that’s crazy!”

“Soak it?” Amity suggested.

“Like a plant!” Willow agreed.

“Excellent thinking, team!”

Gus ran for a bowl, filling it with water and shaking the sheets of pasta into the water. “Hunter, how’s the sauce coming along?”

Hunter backed away from the stove. “It’s hissing and spitting at me.”

“That means it’s ready! Tofu, if you please, Willow!”

Willow picked up the cutting board and scraped the tofu in. “All ready, captain! Should we put spices in, SIR!”

“The box says oregano!” Amity piped up, waving it.

Gus grinned. “We can do better than that! Get me, uhhhhh oregano, pepper, uhhh…. What was that thing we had the other day… paprika!”

Amity handed him the bottles, and he shook them in wildly, until the mustard was almost orange with paprika.

“Excellent!” Gus stirred the mixture around. “Ahhhh, should have saved some mustard for the bottom of the pan!”

“We can just put it on cold,” Hunter suggested, “It’ll heat up in the oven, anyway.”

“True.” Gus took the pan of filling off of the stove, plunking it on a hotplate. The pasta left the water, and Willow cut them into squares. Gus lined them up, top and bottom. “Hunter?”

Hunter scooped out dollops of filling onto each bottom square, and Gus put the top on, pinching them together. Hunter shook mustard onto the bottom of the pan, moving the pan back and forth quickly until it spread over the whole bottom. “Pan’s ready.”

Gus dropped each ravioli in, then slathered more mustard on top, as well as a dollop of cheese. “Ready to go in!”

“How long?”

“Ummmmm fifteen minutes sounds right?”

Amity shook her head. “No way it cooks in that time!”

“Box says ten, actually,” Hunter piped up. “Our oven is too hot, too. And—”

Gus held his hands up. “Okay, compromise! Ten minutes on four hundred, does that work for everyone?”

Amity and Hunter glanced at the pan, at each other, then to him. “Okay,” they chorused.

Gus slid the pan into the oven. “And nowwwwww we wait!”

Willow headed towards the sink to do the dishes, and Hunter and Gus crouched in front of the oven to watch the ravioli through the window.

“It’s bubbling,” Hunter commented, “Is that good?”

“Means it’s cooking.”

“Oh. How do you know so much about cooking, anyway?”

“Well, I’ve never really cooked before—unless you count making a sandwich—but I’ve watched my dad cook plenty of times.”

“Well, your sandwiches are pretty good. I bet this will be, too.”

“Thanks.” Gus watched the ravioli, counting the bubbles. “You think he’s okay?”

“The ravioli?”

“My dad.”

“Oh. Yeah. Of course he is.”

Gus snorted. “Convincing.”

“I mean, he cooks, he’s a reporter used to being in dangerous situations, and he raised you, right? He can take care of himself. He’s okay.”

“I guess.”

Hunter nudged him. “And I bet he’d love your mustard ravioli.”

“Of course he would. It’s going to be delicious. Do you think it’s done?”

A ravioli exploded, sending its filling all over the oven with a pop.

“Yeah, I think it’s done.”

Hunter reached in and pulled the pan out with his bare hands, sliding it onto the stovetop. “Looks good!”

The door opened and closed, and the jangle of Camila’s keys hit Gus’ ears. “Hey, kids!” she called, “Sorry I’m late! You guys must be hungry.”

Gus raced to meet her. “Actually! We made dinner! Here, you can be the first to try my special, homemade ravioli!”

She let him lead her to the kitchen. “Oh, ravioli? How thoughtful, thank you Gus!”

“Well—everyone helped. But it was my recipe.”

“Exciting! I can’t wait to try!”

Gus grabbed a plate, spooning a couple of the ravioli on. “Oh, yeah! Hope you’re ready for an explosion of flavor!”

#camila run #toh #the owl house #my writing #toh fanfiction #gus porter #willow park #amity blight #toh hunter #writing requests

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apuckishwit · 1 year

Text

Interlude: The Besties Conspire

A preview of chapter 28 of Rolled a 1 on the Check, Rolled a 20 on the Save on AO3

All told, living with Steve turns out to be one of the best decisions she and Vickie have ever made.

There are a few hiccups and minor squabbles of course. Going from living alone (or with just his significant other) to having three roommates is an adjustment for Steve. Despite knowing it’s a good idea that will benefit them tremendously in the long run, it is kind of a weird dynamic to be letting Steve pay the entirety of the rent and just pitch in for groceries and utilities. Logically, she knows he can well afford it and he’s doing it out of love and a desire to help pull her, Vickie, and Chrissy up into the place of financial stability his grandparents’ trust fund let him achieve…but it’s still kind of weird.

They work through it, and within a few weeks, it’s smooth sailing. Chrissy throws herself into interviewing for a teaching position in and around her hometown, with her student teaching coming to an end in another month. Robin and Vickie start talking about Vickie maybe quitting her job over the summer so she can apply for some of the internships her marketing professor talks about. It’s never been an option for them before, but it could really help Vickie land a good job when she graduates next year. Then she can support them while Robin finishes her linguistics degree. Steve starts classes and he and Chrissy often spend the evenings bent over his notes and books, going over things while he finds his stride in school again.

After about his second week of classes, it’s Chrissy who sits down with him and asks very nicely if he’s ever been tested for any learning disabilities. “You kind of remind me of some of my kids with ADD, but honestly, the way you describe things, you might just have a general processing delay. Your brain works just fine, it just takes a little longer to digest everything.”

“A few of my teachers wanted to have me tested over the years, but my parents never allowed it. I got by. I was thinking of going to student services and seeing what I’d have to do to get some kind of accommodations, but I got distracted getting registered and moving apartments and everything.”

“If you stop by the student services office and get the forms, I can help you fill them out and make an appointment for the testing. In the meantime, I really think it’d help you if you recorded your lectures instead of trying to take notes. That way, you can highlight the really important stuff as you go, and then come back for anything you missed later.”

Steve looks so stunned at the idea Robin has to laugh a little, even as her heart aches for the thought of her best friend struggling more than he had to, with parents who never cared enough about him to help.

Well fuck it, Steve’s got a whole new family now. One that absolutely will never leave him struggling by himself.

And it’s because he’s got a whole new family that will never leave him struggling, of which Robin is one of the chief parts if she does say so herself, that she and Vickie are determined to help him solve The Eddie Problem. All joking about emotional support lesbians and community bi laws aside, Steve’s her best friend. Her best friend who has made her and her girlfriend’s lives an order of magnitude less stressful, who she loves like a brother, and who she wants to see as deliriously happy with his partner as she is with hers (sue her—she’s happy and in love and she wants to spread that shit around like peanut butter on a slice of bread). And Steve seems pretty fixated on Eddie Munson, but utterly unconvinced that he has a shot.

Which is why she and Vickie are currently perched on the couch on either side of Steve, a huge plate of pulled pork loaded nachos (with the warmer weather, Steve’s cooking class has been doing barbecue lately, and it’s the best thing ever) balanced on Steve’s lap and his laptop set up on the coffee table in front of them. They’ve been watching recordings of this Eddie guy’s streams on and off for about a week now, a few hours at a time, and the number of times she and Vickie have exchanged loaded looks over Steve’s head is ludicrous.

A tilt of Vickie’s eyebrow as Eddie calls Steve some sappy pet name for the umpteenth time: Are you hearing this?

Robin presses her lips together and widens her eyes: He’s not being even remotely subtle.

Robin jerks her chin and shrugs a shoulder when Steve laughs a little too loudly at some joke Eddie’s just made: I can’t believe the dingus ever questioned if he was bi.

Vickie waggles her eyebrows: Right?

Robin sucks her cheeks in like a fish and rolls her eyes heavenward: They’ve got it so bad for each other, it’s making me physically ill.

Vickie smacks her lips and flutters her eyelashes: These nachos are incredible.

“Oh my God, they are!” Robin says out loud, prompting Steve to shoot her a confused look. Robin just ruffles his hair and stuffs another tortilla chip loaded down with pulled pork, barbecue sauce, melted cheese, red onions, and sour cream into her mouth. After a moment, Steve gets distracted by something on the stream, pausing it and rewinding it a few seconds only to listen to the same description of some guard tower in some town before letting out a triumphant hah!. He doesn’t elaborate though, and so Robin pays it no mind. She’s got bigger things to think about.

Like the fact that Eddie Munson has been heavily flirting with her best friend for literal months. Like, it’s not even “I want to get in your pants” flirting, they’re well into “I want to marry you and have your babies, shall we adopt or get a surrogate?” territory. But Steve…her dear, sweet dingus who is somehow simultaneously one of the most mature and emotionally intelligent people she knows and a completely oblivious idiot…will never believe her and Vickie if they tell him that.

She’s going to have to get creative.

She glances down into the chat window displayed at the bottom of Munson’s stream. She and Vickie both clocked the little tally game some of Munson’s regular viewers have going every time he and Steve do or say something that reveals how goddamn down bad they are for each other. And she’s also noticed that one of them in particular seems to be someone who knows Munson in real life, if the side comments he makes to the commenter on mic are anything to go by.

She looks over at her girlfriend and wrinkles her nose, slanting a look down at the chat window where Gare-Bear-Stare has just made another tally mark after Munson took actually kind of an absurdly long time describing Steve’s character’s muscles flexing as he helped heave one of the boys’ characters out of a river crossing: We should talk to this guy.

Vickie gives her a discreet thumbs-up: Absolutely.

Then she presses her hand to her bosom and swoons back against the couch: Seriously, this sauce is to die for.

“It is! I’d eat this on a floor tile!” Robin replies.

“What the hell are you two talking about?” Steve asks.

#steddie #platonic soulmates stobin #Rolled a 1 on the Check Rolled a 20 on the Save #my writing #fic preview #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #stranger things #stranger things fic

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bryan360 · 7 months

Text

Here’s my note before I’ll get started….

(NO COPYING OR PLAGIARIZING FROM ME AND ONE OF MY CLOSEST FRIEND’S WORK! THAT INCLUDES OUR CHARACTERS, DESIGNS, STUFF, ETC. IMPOSTERS AND SEXBOTS ARE NOT WELCOME TO FOLLOW MY BLOG WHATSOEVER! 😡 That will be all….I mean it.)

“Day 2: Imposters 🕷️👉👈🕷️”

I’m back, everyone. Sorry that I’ve went from today’s program just like I said before posting my “late” International Raccoon Day artwork; with Nacho (The Loud House).

But now I’d came back to delivered my saved Inktober artwork for today; as well for my recent progress ones I’m still working on.

Anyways, here’s for 🐻🛩️🚘Bearo and 🐻📚🍭Beara (Bear siblings OCs) in Day 2 through spectacular Inktober week!

As expected or at least unexpected, they’re having a fight because of them wearing both similar “Spider-Man” like costumes. You know how it turned out.

🐻🛩️🚘Bearo: Well, yeah! She copied my costume idea first before I was even noticed.

🐻📚🍭Beara: No way! He totally copied from me due to my costume is better. And stop pointing at me, Bearo!

🐻🛩️🚘Bearo: Then just stop pointing at me, sis. Seriously with the “pointing imposter” meme from that 1960s cartoon back then. It’s weird when we doing it, but sheesh! 😬

🐻📚🍭Beara: So much of having “great powers” yet comes with annoyance. 😒

🐻🛩️🚘Bearo: Hey! That’s not what it said from the comics, you know.

🐻📚🍭Beara: Said the guy who’d copy my costume idea for this year’s Halloween.

🐻🛩️🚘Bearo: Oh! *facepalm*

Well, that’s brother and sister relationship for ya. 😅 (I should’ve renamed this title “Copycats”.)

Bearo & Beara (in their spider suits) created by me; BryanVelasquez87 (Bryan360)

Previous: ⬇️

“Day 1: Looney 🐰🔨” - Link Here #1

Tagged: @murumokirby360 @carmenramcat @alexander1301 @rafacaz4lisam2k4 @paektu

#inktober 2023 #day 2 #imposters #copycats #actually #spider man #costumes #pointing meme #fight #bearo #beara #bears #siblings #animal ocs #my animal ocs #etc.#october 2023 #october 2nd 2023

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depressopax · 1 month

Text

From ABQ with love, Nacho

Chapter 1

This is the first chapter of my LCDP x BCS AU/Nacho spin-off. More info can be found here! || AO3 link

Chapter summary: After being saved by "The fancy son of a bitch", his travel from Albuquerque, to an unknown destination begins. But who is the man really? Why did he save Nacho? And where are they headed? Words: 1.8k TW: Drugs/drugging, cuss words, blood [Might be a bit OOC, bare with me] English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3

I don’t know where he’s taking me, the man who introduced himself as “Berlin” - But I choose to remain to calling him “The fancy son of a bitch”

But I don’t dare to ask him. Whether I like it or not - He saved my ass.

So when he threatens to kill me if I try escaping, when he drugs me into obedience, when he drives me through the country, and when we sit down at the airport and then on the plane - I don’t make a sound.

Plane I haven’t been on a plane since I was a kid.

Me and dad only went on trips a couple of times.

We didn’t grow up poor - and my childhood was happy.

My dad was a single parent and had his own company, so it was up to him to make sure his son was well fed.

He did a good job, my dad. But I had the tendency to get myself into trouble.

It was a combination of the adrenaline junkie within me, the people I made friends with, and the economical situation me and dad had.

It started with Domingo and Tuco - and escalated into the Salamancas and the cartel.

Dad is an honorable man. In the fog of my mind, I see his face. I remember us on that airplane once, when I went on my first vacation. I was so excited, and he smiled at me.

It hurts. It fucking hurts.

He probably thinks I’m dead. In some ways, I am indeed dead.

Did Mike keep his promise? Is my dad safe?

I’m not religious but still I pray to all Gods possible that he gets out safely.

I hate myself for putting him in danger. I hate myself for my choices.

And I hate the fancy son of a bitch next to me.

We fly first class.

He’s a rich fuck, too. He looks unfazed, where he sits reading a book and drinking what I can only guess is alcohol.

Drinking in the light of the day, on a plane? Seriously?

The rich son of a bitch who calls himself “Berlin” looks at me. I must have been staring. If looks could kill, he’d drop dead now.

“I would offer you a scotch, but you’re high.” he chuckles and I grunt in reply. I turn my head to not see his smug face. My situation is confusing and humiliating enough. He continues talking to me, but I’m not listening.

Somehow, he reminds me of Lalo.

The way he talks, his confidence and that sick, twisted personality. They’d make good friends. I manage to laugh and surprise both him and myself.

“Where… We headed…” I manage to spit out. Literally tho. I don’t know what kind of drugs I’m on, but it's difficult to open and close my mouth. I’m probably drooling. And he probably finds joy in seeing people like that.

“Spain. But to which town I can’t let you know.”

Spain…

“Why?”

“Because I’m ordered to bring you there. A friend of mine has an offer for you. And you’re a damn stupid brat if you don’t agree. Besides, this little trip cost me a fortune. Imagine all the fancy wines I could’ve brought, instead of picking up some depressed, bald cartel man.”

Suddenly I’m happy to be drugged. The fancy son of a bitch should be too. I’d slap his smug face bloody if I could.

I don’t give a fuck that he “saved” me. I don’t care if we’re on a plane. I’d ruin him.

“Fuck you.” I whisper.

He glances at me, up and down. I must look ridiculous with sweaty, dirty clothes, wounds and bruises on my face. That, with the dark circles marking my dark eyes, combined with how affected I must look from the drugs, with half open mouth and eyes. He definitely notices, because his next words are:

“I have no idea what the Professor saw in you.”

The Professor? I choke back a laugh. Berlin. The professor. What the fuck is this?

“You should’ve let me die.”

Silence.

“Yes. Yes I should have, huh?” He puts the book down and stares blankly at me. “I’ll get some sleep. Ima have to drug you again, so you don’t try suffocating me with a pillow.”

“Yea. Because I’d definitely try to escape when we’re on a damn plane.” My voice is coated with sarcasm and the fancy son of a bitch laughs. When he hands me a pill, I don’t have the energy, nor willpower to disagree. I swallow it down with water and soon my brain is fogged up again and I enter a world of dreams.

I remember my dad’s worry. I had just joined the cartel and for the first time in my life, I was beaten bloody. My face was swollen and I was limping when I sunk down outside his door.

“Hijo?” a tired voice said. His face twisted to concern, to anger and then fright. Having to explain what had happened to him was not easy. His worry was not the worst. It was the disappointment in his eyes.

“Sorry.” I mumbled. “I got this under control, ok?”

What a lie.

The next day is the same: Airplanes and cars - in the company of what I’m now sure is a sociopath. He talks to me as if we were friends. He mocks me like he hates me, and he asks me questions like he was a cop and I was a suspect. I can’t figure him out. At all.

When we finally arrive at an old house in the dead of night, I’m finally free from those damn pills, and I get to eat some real food. I even get my own room. That night, I slept like I’ve never slept before.

The wardrobe in “my room” has some simple t-shirts and jeans, a pair of sweatpants, a hoodie, and even some work-out clothes.

I should feel relieved but I’m anxious. It feels like danger creeps over me. Is this some sort of sick joke? Is “Berlin” part of the cartel too? I don’t know. At least the door to the room is open. The house is dark and dusty. If someone actually lives here, they must be a disruptive person. I walk the house mindlessly. I find a kitchen, dining room, bathrooms and like 8 more bedrooms. There’s even an attic.

Curiosity takes over and I climb the stairs up.

I walk into… A classroom…?

Yes. A classroom.

A blackboard, a desk with pens and papers… A line of small tables and chairs, exactly like the ones I used to sit by when I was young and in school.

One word is written with white chalk on the board: ¡Bienvenido! It says.

“Hello.” I flinch and by instinct reach for the gun I don't carry anymore.

Not because this man looks like a threat either ways.

The thin, bearded man seems to be my age, with dark, thick glasses, wavy hair and a dark suit. Everything he’s wearing is dark. As dark as the house. He doesn’t look like a snob. The suit looks as old and vintage as the interior of the house. Must be he who owns the residence. He almost looks like a…

“Professor.” I mumble. The man smiles and looks nervous.

“That’s right. You may call me ‘The Professor’”

No thank you. Is what I don’t say. I just stare at him, as if he just told me a joke that wasn’t funny.

“Ignacio…” he sighs and pulls out a chair. He takes a seat and looks at me. I should hate him. But I can't. Not yet, either ways. “...I’m sorry about your trip here. Berlin can be… Intense.”

“He’s a sociopath.” I correct him with a hiss.

“...Whatever you want to call him. Do you know why you’re here, Mr. Varga?”

Mr. Varga. I’m starting to think this man is older than he seems.

“No.”

“It’s because I have a plan. And I need you for it to work.”

“What? You needed to bring me all the way from Albuquerque and to… Wherever the hell we are, for it?”

“In Toledo. And yes. I needed to.”

“How’d you find me? And why?” I start to feel annoyed, but mostly because I’m so calm. I’ve totally lost my mind. I shouldn’t even hear this man out. Still, I want to. I need to understand my own situation.

“You were in a dark place, Ignacio. But in the darkness there's light. There’s this man that told me about you. He told me about your situation, about your skills and past. You’re a great asset to my team.”

“Who?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“To me it does!”

The Professor starts looking annoyed now too.

“Can I please talk?” The way he’s talking makes me feel like a kid. It’s like getting lectured and I hate it. So I sigh and seal my lips.

“Of course.”

“Thank you.” he adjusts the thick glasses. “Like I was saying; You’re a great asset to my team. You have been in the cartel, you know how to handle weapons and I’m guessing you’re good when it comes to money?”

“What the fuck is this?” I stand up. I’m starting to lose my patience with this shit, hell, I lost it the second I got here.

I walk up to him, threatingly. It seems to work. Of course.

“Manuel Varga. He’s alive and well.”

I want to kill him for talking about my father. But I also want to cry and thank him for saving my father.

“How do you…”

“I promise to hand you proof of his safety, if you promise to hear me out.”

The Professor sounds stern. Yea. His nickname definitely makes sense now. I sit down again. Finally, the bearded man starts talking.

“This week, you’ll meet your new crew of eight other criminals. You - and Berlin, are the first to arrive. These people shall be your new “family”. You’ll eat together, live together and get to know each other - build up trust and grow strong - together.”

He goes quiet.

“Okay…?” I say, my eyebrows furrowing.

“And then… In five months from now… We’ll rob the Royal Mint of Spain.”

I’m startled. Shocked. Then I laugh. This is a sick joke. Of course. My laughter dies out. The man stares blankly at me. Oh God. He’s being serious.

“...That’s impossible.”

“Difficult, yes. But not impossible, Ignacio.”

We stare each other down. After a while, I shake my head.

“How?”

He smiles at me. A cocky smile, this time. For the first time, I actually see more in him - besides a four-eyed lunatic. Maybe, just maybe…

“I have a plan.”

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onceuponaoneshotfanfic · 10 months

Text

oops my hand slipped and i wrote the meet-cute scene (using Brett's name for now but ofc will change it if i actually decide to write this thing)

“Dude, come on, let’s just go home.”

Tyler shook his head at me. “No way, we’re next in line. Even if you don’t want to meet him, I do.”

I folded my arms and sighed, glancing forward. There he was. To call Brett Goldstein my “celebrity crush” would be an understatement; I was pretty obsessed with the guy. I’d seen every single movie and television show he’d been in or wrote, watched his standup specials multiple times, and listened to his podcast religiously. Part of it was because he was so clever, and funny, and thoughtful no matter what the project was; I freely admitted that the other reason was because he was absolutely gorgeous.

Over the last three years Tyler had indulged me a lot. Lots of nights spent watching my favorite movies on repeat and getting the pizza toppings I wanted, or avoiding places that made my heart ache to think about even though they used to be our favorite spots, or even joining that book club that we both quit within a week. That was the main reason we were at Brett Goldstein’s comedy show; Tyler had bought us tickets for the show the moment they went on sale, before I even had to ask. And now he’d insisted on getting in line for the meet-and-greet after the show.

“Next!”

My breath hitched when I saw those brown eyes turn in my direction and light up.

Tyler shoved me forward with a chuckle. “Dude, go.”

Brett Goldstein smiled and stuck his hand out. “Hi, thanks for coming.”

“H-hi,” I choked out, forcing myself to take his hand. “You were great,” I managed to add, still shaking his hand. “Really, really great.”

Damn. I was just losing myself in those brown eyes and that smile. It was as if I’d forgotten every word I knew; I hadn’t had a moment like that in a long time. As always, Tyler intervened to save my ass.

“You know, she wants you to be her next husband,” he pipped up, smirking. “After the death of husband number one.” So much for saving my ass.

Brett broke eye contact to raise his thick eyebrows at Tyler. “Oh, so I’ve just got to wait for you to get cancer or some shit, then?” he teased.

There it was. I cleared my throat. “Oh, no, he’s not my husband, that’s my best friend.” I finally dropped his hand and rubbed the back of my neck. “My, um, husband passed away three years ago. From cancer, actually.”

The look on Brett Goldstein’s face was familiar: the creased eyebrows, the pity in his eyes, the mouth formed into an O. I’d seen it a lot in the last few years, and now it was on the face of my biggest crush. Nice.

“Oh fuck,” he groaned. “I’m so sorry. I’m an asshole.”

“It’s fine,” I assured him in that awkward, reassuring voice I’d perfected from all the times I’d had this same conversation with everyone from relatives to coworkers to my mail carrier. “I’m fine.”

He shook his head. “No, um, let me buy you a drink.” He waved at one of the club employees who scurried over. “Hey, these two are with me, okay? Anything they want, on my tab.” He turned back to us. “Seriously, anything you want, on me. Take full advantage of my guilt.”

“You really don’t have to-”

Tyler gripped my shoulder. “Let the nice Emmy-award winner buy us some drinks,” he hissed. “And maybe some nachos.”

Brett nodded, taking my hand again and giving it a firm shake. “Please. Let me buy you some nachos.”

Okay. Fine. With those eyes and that half smile on his face, that man could buy me all the nachos he wanted.

I rolled my eyes in defeat, my own smile forming. “Fine. Thank you.”

He gave my hand a small squeeze before letting go. “Thank you.”

#would you actually read this book?#like for real?#is it too self indulgent?#and do i care????#just writing stuff

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nanabrainrot · 11 months

Note

After reading the story with Lalo’s death, I’m curious about MC in Breaking Bad taking care of Hector. I’d love to see that ! Maybe she’d meet Walt and Jesse, who knows ?

I was j thinking of this; she ran into jesse a few times and has yet to meet walt because she stays at home with hector unless she goes out to get a necessity or her weird little home improvement efforts but I wrote a drabble on it </3 hmmc is so sweet despite her circumstances like she rly is j trying her best

Home Improvement

Summary: you like to refresh the house and practice your English. WC: 1528

It is hot out, admittedly thanks to the heat in New Mexico. The weather conditions were less than ideal for someone not accustomed to dry and hot climates but it was a reminder of Chihuahua. A slice of nostalgia packed in a carry away box and left to rot in the back of the fridge. It only consoled you that the same sun beamed down on you at a different time in different coordinates.

It feels like starting over, a rebirth, but with complications like a baby born with the cord around its neck wriggling and blue in the face.

But it’s not, it’s just a passing moment. Hector stays inside, given by his circumstances, but he will occasionally indulge in a walk if coaxed enough. Tuco stopped by often, Marco and Leonel less often, with their faces stiff and hands tense as they tentatively hand you a hard candy, then a soft one for Hector of course.

The place is a piece of shit compared to the house in Chihuahua, the hacienda where you could bathe in the sun but differently it feels more relaxed in the shitty house in the desert of Albuquerque, but some knick knacks serve little reminders; men really have no eye for decor, you think. Tuco is no handyman after getting out, that hot-head, relaying just the bare bones of meals and the scummy television.

Internally, you wish Lalo would have let you have your own savings account. Nacho did deliver some money to you before he vanished and you saved it, sparsely trying to budget after twenty some years of knowing nothing about finances. Tuco was sweet enough to give an allowance and Marco and Leonel always secretively left a thick wad of cash every few months when they popped in. But thankfully, it’s enough for some paint this week.

The paint you can’t reach.

An accent wall with wallpaper would surely lighten the ambience of the shitshow house, still sorting out how to live without Lalo was a mess. It was a mix of good days and bad days, the days missing someone loving you and then the days where you recall he was not the best husband, that what you had was not healthy and not right. It’s liberating, freeing, so you choose a wallpaper too. If you could reach that one too.

“Lady, you need some help?”

Frozen. Oh, Lalo’s not here. He can’t beat the shit out of some worker trying to help you, but at the turn of your neck it isn’t a worker but just… some kid. He didn’t look young enough to be in high school, but he likely graduated a year or two back. The scruff on his face is brown and the hue of his eyes look cold and harsh, but probably just the lighting of the harsh fluorescent lights looming above head.

“I just can’t reach the mint green up there or the dark blue floral paper of the wall. Can you just grab them for me?” you stutter, still acclimating to speaking English more than Spanish. You spoke in Spanish to Hector, but Tuco almost always spoke to you in English. It caused a headache; Lalo never spoke in anything but Spanish to you. Ah, it feels like a bad day and the thought of your accent feels heavy in your throat.

Did you say that right? It was mint, right? How do you phrase it?

“You mean wallpaper?”

“Yes! Wallpaper! I’m still learning English,” you murmur embarrassed as the kid in baggy clothes moves to get the items for you before clunking them into your wobbly little cart. It’s so odd, speaking with strangers without anyone looming over you. It's still hard to go outside without a dress code, no dress constricting the ankles, but you can’t help but try to look good still.

Maybe he was looking at you from Heaven? He seemed to prefer the kitten wedges with a sundress, but this outside is outside of your realm. The cheap cotton of the clothes in New Mexico compared to the spoils of Chihuahua felt reminiscent of when you had no money in your teens. Ah, it still feels like a bad day.

“Your English is really good, ma’am,” he reassures.

“Really? You understand me?”

There’s the cross look of worry in his face at your mannerisms, the unnerving anxiety of the way your hands twitched and how you looked not at him but past him. “Yeah, perfectly,” the kid chuckles, “you’re a natural, lady.”

A grin, at him, not past him. “You are very nice, young man.”

“Young man? What are you, barely thirty?” he scoffed as you both went to roll your carts to checkout; his was full of thick tubs and strange chemicals. A science project for college, you thought innocently, glancing at his weird collection of items.

“So nice! I’m turning 46 this year - I think?” you murmur the last part, scooting ahead of the boy in the line since you only had the wallpaper and paint; you had been painstakingly washing the brushes over and over to use again. Money suddenly was so important in the past four years you had spent trying to fix up Hector’s house. It was coming along; some knick knacks recycled from Abuelita’s house to try to lift Hector’s spirits and antiques that had been restored to try and make it less scummy. The trials of getting paperwork and steady income was difficult after so many years without any work experience. It was foolish to forget Lalo was mortal.

“You think?” he laughs a little at your skittish self, placing the paint and wallpaper on the conveyor belt for the employee, who smiles half-heartedly.

“Yeah, my husband never celebrated my real birthday. It got lost over the years but if my birth certificate is right I should be 46 in about two months?”

“Sounds like a shitty husband.”

It sounds like a backhanded compliment, one that you have brewed on, as you count the twenties that Tuco gave you. You miss the feel of pesos a bit, but going back over the border seemed to be a fruitless effort. It would feel like taking two steps back.

“Only sometimes,” you reply softly, taking the receipt from her and scooting forward so he could pay for his numerous tubs and chemicals.

“This is my car!” you cheer, showing him the otherwise unimpressive buggy with little scratches and bumps on it from your errors trying to learn how to drive; poles are always so much closer than they seem…

“You seem really excited for a little buggy, lady,” the kid chuckles, loading his tubs in his trunk of a bright red car. It’s all flashy, like Nacho’s was. “I am! It is hard to learn how to drive after you hit 40,” you grin,”I didn’t touch a wheel until 5 years ago!”

“Damn, you had a chauffeur?” he jokes, strolling next to you to the cart return with his own cart.

“Chaffeur?” you scrunch your brows, pushing the cart in.

“Oh uh, it’s a guy who drives you everywhere.”

“Oh? My husband was my chauffeur?”

“Your shitty husband was your chauffeur, yeah,” he laughs like a silly belly laugh and it makes you giggle. He was a shitty husband, you think sometimes, but not too often. If you reflect too hard you might miss the two decades you spent with him.

“Mister, I’m going home now - I’m my own chauffeur!” you cry out, trying to pronounce the new word like he did - like a real Albuquerque native. “What’s your name, mister?”

He rolls down his window, a smile playing at his pink lips, “Jesse! You?”

You give him your name, not even a thought that the first thing that left your mouth for once wasn’t “Mrs. Salamanca” at the question. It starts to feel like a good day.

“Tuco, buenos tar - I mean good afternoon! I bought - not buyed! - the wallpaper and paint for our sanctuary,” you holler, happy at the conversation. Usually, you were too iffy to allow for help but the only other option was to scale a ladder yourself or talk to the ginormous lumberjack of a man that worked in the store rather than the nice boy.

“Tio, mira, este es un hermoso mint! Mint green para nos muras!” you smile, pecking Hector’s head like Lalo did every time he saw him. His lip twitches.

The past four years without Lalo were not easy, but it’s living. The walls are mint and it smells like paint in the kitchen, something Hector rang his bell about jokingly as you poked your tongue at him. The one wall has wallpaper, but you think you could use more. The sweet floral against the navy looks like Lalo’s shirts. You hope you run into Jesse twice at the store. Internally, you wish him luck with whatever science project he has going.

But for now, the print of Lalo’s shirt is reflected in the wall, seen by Hector’s little glance and your tight throat. And you wonder, a small voice in your head, how do you get back twenty-four years?

AUTHOR'S NOTE: the mc from Homemaker will be divided into three routes for people looking for the true ending that works with canon, the Homemaker verse where Lalo wins, and my work "Companion Dog" will be focused on the weird moments in their marriage where ur like "that's not healthy!" ty for the askkkkkkkk i love interactions and interest in my work <3

#nana writes bcs #nana writes #hmmc true #ask nana

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numinous-queer · 1 year

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I keep telling myself that we’re living in Sola’s childhood, not her court case. That said, tomorrow is a court hearing and I am scared stiff as usual. The agency never shares information with us, so court brings with it the terrifying possibility that we learn her permanency plan will suddenly change and take her to more distant relatives in New Mexico or something else we can’t even guess yet. We can’t live every day in that world of wondering if we’ll have to say goodbye so I try not to dwell, but it gets really hard to do around court dates.

In order to give myself something happy and good to focus on, I’d like to take a minute to share some cute and happy moments with Sola recently!

As you can see from the chalk drawing above, kiddo is getting really into Monsters Inc recently! Specifically, the sequel Monsters University where Mike wears a baseball cap like this:

Since getting into this movie, she has decided to “share” Grandpa Eric’s baseball cap by taking it home with us one day after a visit. (He doesn’t mind!) She wears it constantly while pretending to be “Mama Mike,” and won’t be parted from it even to go to sleep. The only way I can get her to leave it behind is to say that one of her stuffed animals would like a turn:

Sola has always ALWAYS been obsessed with the color yellow, and Lexie recently bought her a linen dress that is bright goldenrod. Kiddo LOVES it, and keeps saying “I’m sunshine! I’m the sun!” while twirling around. She figured out that if she stands over the heating grate it makes the dress fly up Marilyn Monroe style, which makes her laugh and laugh!

Kiddo is best friends with our big placid labrador Nacho, and I love listening to her talk to him. The other day he was sniffing her face extra aggressively after she had finished her syrupy pancakes, and she giggled for a long time before squeaking out, “I’m flower!” I tell her stories about the golden retriever named Lemon that Nacho says hi to in the park sometimes, and she is invested in their doggy friendship to a point that would make your blorbos jealous

We go to this wonderful community event called Foster Parent’s Night Out once a month, where a group of volunteers puts together a huge fun event for the kids with a nice dinner every month, and gives their caretakers four glorious hours to rest and do chores. This month’s theme was “PARKOUR” and Sola was so wiped out afterwards that she fell asleep in the car holding her favorite stuffed T-Rex in one hand and a piece of pizza in the other. Living the dream, little lady, living the dream!

Her new favorite game during bathtime is to pretend that the toy basket is a shark that’s eating her leg, and she needs to get saved by one of her dollies. Once you obligingly save her, she gleefully puts the shark in time out, including telling Alexa to set the timer for three minutes. Sometimes the dollies go to their cave (behind the bath curtains) and have loud disagreements that remain a mystery to me, and then the loser is ejected into the tub to her uproarious laughter. There’s a splash zone, but she’s having the absolute time of her life!

#I love her!#it hurts to love her this much - the uncertainty of her future is like trying to staunch an open wound #the kid

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bryan382 · 7 months

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