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shopcat · 1 year

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HI. this is the steve harrington autism post. source: i have the steve harrington style autism that makes me autistic about him

to preface this i would like to say i am working off of personal like interpretation and thru the lens of my own experience :0... also this is long lol <3 so, tl;dr, here are the autistic traits or things that are caused by autism i believe steve showcases, (except.. do read if you like <3):

sensory issues -> wearing only ever the same style of clothes, adjusting/touching his hair, (potentially) eating certain foods

stimming -> walking in place to think, fiddling with small objects, spinning/flipping/throwing objects to keep himself focussed or entertained, listening to music

scripting -> repeating phrases/words aloud and practicing what he's going to say, repeating the "plan" aloud

routine -> strict hair routine with specific steps, was in routine sports with strict rules/timing and enjoys them otherwise, driving robin to school every day without even knowing she couldn't bc it was routine, working jobs that require mindless but engaging tasks including organisation

poor grasp of social cues, especially with girls, and saying the "wrong" thing at the wrong time (including the 6 little nuggets speech, "he ate dustin's cat", confessing to robin, etc)

other people feeling like they have to tell him things he's "missed" socially (dustin telling him he likes robin, eddie telling him he likes nancy)

likes to set/follow rules and is upset when people deviate from them (i.e. max wanting to leave in s4)

out of-the-box/atypical/lateral thinking

delayed processing of thoughts/concepts/complicated subjects especially in high-intensity scenarios

picking up on small details (like background sounds in large areas or recognising something) that other people don't pick up on

fixating on certain things (hair, clothes/shoes, sports, etc)

high pain tolerance/sensory dysregulation (shaking off concussions/consistent, continued ability to function while severely injured)

inability to conceptualise his OWN mortality/safety and engaging in at risk situations with little thought other than instinct + making impulsive choices

developmental differences/delays (literally crawling backwards)

poor grades in school/not getting into college

trouble regulating emotion

poor self esteem due to feeling worthless :(

i also have adhd so i also keep this in mind a little and obv at the end of the day this is just my own interpretation + autism is a spectrum :) NOW. i will go into detail >:)

SOOO i'm not sure if steve was deliberately coded as autistic but i DO think they intentionally in one way or another coded him with a developmental disability of some kind!! which i will talk about first!!

this is shown particularly in season 2 in a couple different instances and continues into season 3 at undercurrent ..

we've discussed this a little before but i also think this is why when people like to just describe him as genuinely "dumb" it like hurts people's feelings 😭 my feelings... and that's not intentional ofc but while it is a personal insecurity of the character himself that is being ironically picked at, positively or not, by those who love him in fandom, it's also evident of something happening under the surface that people may be unaware of imo

i think he display a out of-the-box, atypical or lateral way of thinking combined with delayed processing in a way that is very typical to neurodivergent behaviour!! and more...

in season 2 we get a really nice little look into his psychology about it when nancy is reading his college admission essay (that he presumably asked her to do) and he's sitting there SO nervous and full of doubt and worked up about it he's like. basically twitching 😭

he says "it's crap i know" and nancy's like no it's not! and he's like "ugh it's not good..." sooo stressed out.. and nancy says it just needs some reorganising, which is INTERESTING!!! someone who is insecure in his own skills and inability to get his thoughts across in a succinct way + has good, complex ideas that translate poorly when he tries to explain it out loud or in text + a host of insecurities pre-rooted and explicitly about his own intellectual "failings" all = a very neurodivergent read of Steve Vs School i think

also, maybe a tangent, but: in that essay itself nancy says he starts by using one of his basketball games as a metaphor for his life, then he confuses the metaphor by comparing it to the war his grandfather was in. nancy says she doesn't see how they're connected and he's like "um. it connects because we both won" (i actually think she's being very sweet in this scene!! idg when ppl say she's mean here)

ik this wasn't the show's intention and just extrapolation but i find it really cool + interesting that there IS a war of some kind that steve could talk about that HE fought in, there is a description of high stakes combat where it's him VS them and he is the only one who now has to make this high stakes, risky choice, instead of playing it safe like he always does that relates directly to his life as a metaphor and he DOES feel connected to his grandfather in this sense...

but he can't actually talk about that. so it's basketball. and it's a slightly clunky metaphor that makes it seem like, trite, like oh silly steve, basketball isn't WAR. the essay itself is actually really well-written and evocative!! but to me signifies this inability to directly translate what he's thinking, hence it needs a little "rearranging", or maybe it's a little "all over the place" even

(also, that he crumpled up the entire essay and dismissed it entirely and fell back on nihilistic thinking and "i'll just work for my dad i guess". he already had cast disbelief upon his own ability to thrive because he feels he's not good enough :( )

his failing grades, which ended in not getting into college, tech or otherwise, is a big part of his post-highschool arc i think. to me it also shows sympathy to a problem many young neurodivergent (in every which way, btw) people face, including myself, and is potentially a really almost kind portrayal of the capability of a person not being wrapped up in their intellectual or i guess SCHOLASTIC endeavours and "achievements", and that you can be successful and "useful" to others in different ways :0

to call him dumb and really mean it (both in and out of show -_-) after all this is a certain kind of disservice i guess? like okay i think a little jokey joke is fine and also absolutely RELATING is fine (and another extension of another one of my points which is basically just "he's just like me fr" can actually = "he's JUST like me... like For Real". he's dumb in the way i'm dumb and we're both not actually dumb) but let's all be cool okayyyy

beyond school, i think he displays SOO many behaviours both characteristically and even like in his physicality that build to this beautiful conclusion... i think steve is this guy who was served up to be an initially one dimensional being who proved himself again and again to have a multitude of complexities beneath the surface :). i think his literal entire character arc is adjacent to the autistic experience LOL... perhaps...

he showcases a certain need and comfort in routine in a variety of ways, like:

being interested in sports both watching recreationally (which have timed matches and he HAS to be there on time, too) and as the hobby itself. sports are a high-routine activity with strict rules and rituals, before, after and during, as well as the extra work you have to put in otherwise!!

ESPECIALLY something like swimming, which is all about certain timing (and an individual-based sport as opposed to the team-based basketball) which he took for years!! (and actually got his cpr verification for, which you absolutely don't need to just like. be on the swim team. but it would be the "right" way to do it LOL) (also idk how it worked in 1980s fictional indiana but you need your verification a year in advance to actually do anything with it where i live!! which means he did it FROM freshman year)

driving robin to school every day, and then presumably picking her up for work sometimes too, despite not even knowing she COULDN'T drive herself because he was so dedicated to this routine (and friendship :D <3)

his hair routine!! it's SO specific (four puffs EXACTLY!!! no more no less... and when it's DAMP not WET) and i am honestly of the mind it's actually far more complex of a routine he even makes it out to be .. and i am willing to bet the multi step experience of it all is sooo long and has to be just as specific too. also extra points for it being something he does that aids in his own self-image and would make him feel like he's putting himself together.? so to speak

i think, in a way, that he owns about 9 pairs of shoes and most of them are white sports shoes with a colour accent + he's been shown to wear the colour accent that matches his outfit more often than not. which i spose is a certain kind of. ritual or routine or something.

he also shows a whole host of sensory issues/complexities/...things!!

he wears the same style of clothes like CONSTANTLY. almost everything he owns is either a soft sweater or a polo shirt, plus the same style of jacket he cycles through, all of which are well-worn (despite him being like, rich) :) the exception is that colourblock denim vest (which i think is the exception for him too because he just wanted to look like marty mcfly. which is so autistic)

i.e. wearing something that you know is comfortable over and over that doesn't give you a poor sensory experience, and continuing to buy the same style of clothing because you know it's safe to do so because he FEELS comfortable. super autistic trait. beloved prep trait as well i also just think he doesn't actually care what he wears but whatever

he also sometimes favours tight clothes and sometimes looser/baggier ones (think one day the s4 blue/white polo and jeans, the next a sweater and loose chinos) which indicates to me possible different sensory needs in the day by day...

he also wears a lot of undershirts, including with the scoops ahoy uniform (which could've been to avoid a POOR sensory experience)

he adjusts/runs his fingers through his hair and makes sure it's in a nice state at an almost compulsive level but it's also like an afterthought kind of. it could also just be a sensory thing to want to retouch his hair and play with it and follow through with the prior routine of it Looking Good + a grounding technique for sure

along with that he stims a LOT, including the thing where he has to twirl or throw ANYTHING in his hands up to and including -> a lighter, the baseball bat MIDFIGHT, a torch, a phone MIDFIGHT, his ice cream scooper, keys, his sailor hat, a banana, a random ball he found... he's also very fiddly and tends to sort of be happy sitting quietly and doing something over and over like that (this is also a trait with adhd :) )

the jobs he worked are relatively low intensity despite customer interaction and had him working with his hands plus at FV there's a lot of sorting/organisation. also "not my TAPES man" because he already sorted them and now it's ruined 😭

you tend to see him taking a little moment for himself in the background of scenes a lot, sometimes with robin as well!! he kind of just wanders off and does his own thing but in the wake of the high emotion, high adrenaline various combats in-show it makes sense, even more so if he just needs a little moment to himself to unwind

he walks/paces to think!!!

the reason he and robin only even threw up in season 3 is a) the stimulating lights he noticed that then b) over-stimulated them

this one's a little less obvious but he listens to the same kind of music and listens to it LOUDLY when he's stressed 😭 he also doesn't turn it off even if he like, technically should like on the way to fight monsters. i think he just likes music a lot tbh but also very autistic to me (and also a reason why he and eddie would be friends and/or kiss on the mouth)

one of the biggest things that sounds off to me is his social interactions :0 he is hailed as this like, ladies man but almost near constantly plummets to the earth in insane social blunder which personally i love actually (and it extends beyond these situations too!!). all the hottest boys are autistic...

i know that this is to show him just like, losing his charm...? and that he peaked in highschool or something and i do love his patheticness but it's also sooo autism. one of the reasons i actually think he's gay (lol) is his compulsive need to try and "land" a social interaction with a woman, then fail, while also not "feeling the spark" with the women he DID land and failing to see why (like his date at the basketball game). he's constantly seeking companionship but it feels like it's just out of his reach and he doesn't get it... sigh... and that it's definitely in part bc he feel he can't relate to them because HE'S so different i think. for whatever reason. multiple.

in season 3 the ENTIRE you rule/you suck board is like a beautiful shrine to this... he's honestly so funny . but like constantly awkwardly flirting and somehow saying the wrong thing every time whilst also not getting that they're Not responding to him until they like, leave, which is like. a statistical unlikelihood to me of times this can happen without something else going on in his little brain. i also like that he "invented" a makeout point bc that opens up the ability to just go um. let's go to skull rock. and the person would be like oh okay yes i am going to makeout with steve harrington.

beyond just girls or failed flirting or whatever a lot of his interactions with the kids or his other friends ping to me as having trouble with social cues and some accidental bluntness!! a FAVOURITE being -> "dart ate a cat?" "no. what? no." "what are you talking about? he ate mews" "who's mews?" "it's dustin's cat" "STEVE..." 😭😭 i love him. also him suggesting he could work his charm on the dean of the school and nancy being like... not that kind of charm.

oh another good moment for this is in the epilogue to season 3 actually like he's trying so hard to show he's seen Some movies (but only remembers the significant/stand out details) and then when robin's like can you give us a moment he's just like. Why. and does this funny little head shake movement. and robin does the steve -_- and he backs away kubrick staring... beautiful scene

he also falls victim i think to saying the wrong thing at the wrong time which is a lot of the time not necessarily his like FAULT ofc but suggests further little issues or . unalignmentd with social interaction. the entire 6 little nuggets speech to nancy to me is one of these situations (and maybe the convo in the woods with her?? idk) where he's kind of just talking and digging a hole and the other person is sort of just sitting there. it's also shown with like "like the germans?"

ALSO, a lot of the time people end up coming to him specifically and sort of like... telling him what to do/how HE feels?? and i think he just sort of goes along with it. in season 3 dustin tells him he has a crush on robin until he kind of talks himself into it and then he accidentally crash-fails for a second time by confessing to her at a sort of insane time as well (not that i think he actually had any feelings for her!!). and in season 4 eddie does the SAME with nancy which is almost spectacular.

alsoo while i think he struggles with certain social cues i also think he's very emotionally intelligent and he picks up on people's feelings easily which i guess someone could say it seems to counter? other autistic traits (silly) but to me i think. autistic people are aware of PLENTY of social cues sometimes the cue is just stupid -_- and i can read other people's emotions for sure in fact i'm almost like hyper attuned to it i just don't know how to RESPOND to it a lot of the time. whereas steve picks up on dustin's nerves at the snow ball and reassures him accordingly (and so cutely..), then picks up on robin's emotions after his confession and near-immediately course corrects after her confession in order to make her laugh!!! he was also really good with picking up on nancy's feelings and knowing exactly what to do about it/using forethought about it (like idk holding her hand when they were having sex or something to ease her nerves but also noticing she was upset at the library) when they were together at least 🤔

there are also a number of other various things very dear to me that i have no where else to include. LIKE:

his high pain tolerance!!! he's able to shake off torture, multiple concussions, various beatings with little to almost NO actual repercussions. in s4 it was actually really interesting how he was feeling bad enough to almost faint after the bats but once he was patched up he was "fine", and acted like he was fine for... the rest of the entire show. he did a backflip. high pain tolerance is an offshoot of a sensory dysregulation!!

specifically a lack of filter and moments where he goes "too far" especially when he's struggling with an emotional dysregulation of sorts, like with dustin in s4 or even with jonathan s1, but also like. the dumb faces he was making behind his date's back.

"when i was a baby, i crawled backwards"!!! autistic children can have different development i.e. their early CHILDHOOD development that can present itself in a variety of ways!! atypical to the norm crawling/walking is one of them (also matches up with robin taking 6 months longer to walk than other babies which she Also said to nancy and i think this is significant of something and i don't know what. maybe it's just funny. also stobin soulmates ofc).

to me, being the guy who mid plan debrief is the one saying "so let me get this straight" AND that he's the one asking the necessary questions to get everyone's minds (and in the 4th wall sense the literal plot) moving suggests that he both feels the need to want clarification of like, plans/instructions and what the situation is so everyone is caught up and he didn't get it wrong, and that just speaking it aloud helps cement it in his mind (which is also scripting as well i believe). also his ability to ask the RIGHT "wrong" questions suggests out of-the-box thinking as well (i would say both of these are also an adhd trait!)

his friendship with robin is honestly a point for me LOL. robin is an example of a character i do believe IS intentionally absolutely autistic coded, especially in season 4 but also 3, and his bond with her seems to be a personal one based in trust in each other and their own similarities... in season 4 when they're lamenting their love lives and say they should "just combine" is so important to me.. ugh

he's very particular and possessive about his belongings in an almost pedantic way (c'mon man not my SCOOPER! and wipe your feet before you get in my CAR and honestly even that he refuses to let max drive it fullstop, a little bit)

he also ate. SO many bananas at scoops i think for a time being it ended up being a safe food which literally happened to me as well. a very small thing but i like it

he scripts!! ie he repeats words and phrases aloud as a form of stimulation and getting himself to think or practices what he's going to say before things so he's "scripting" it (his "i'm sorry wtf am i sorry for" speech before he runs into dustin in s2)

he gets along better people who, by majority, aren't in his peer group i.e. the kids!!! and even robin and nancy were a little younger! he is very genuinely friends with the kids and it is Very Genuinely so sweet, but particularly with dustin too i found it sooo... <3

he also shows like these moments of high-intensity like silly child-like qualities of (autistic) joy LIKE when he sees dustin in scoops and they have their little lightsaber fight (which they. had practiced and made beforehand) that is just so sweet to me...

he picks up on things that other people don't!!! as the Normal Guy in a group of people he typically ends up settling in that role BUT he's multiple times picked up on small details that other people don't or DIDN'T notice, which is a neurodivergent trait!! he recognised the song in the russian recording, recalled where it came from like. right after + was the only one who heard dustin in the upside down + other things like noticing when someone's missing from a room

i also think he may be prone to like. i guess sensory overload/emotional dysregulation when he reacts what i think is appropriately to these HUGE scary scenarios but everyone else is like chill out and therefore it's inappropriate to them that he's losing his mind about it. but as time passes and he gets used to it all it lessens for sure (most evident in season 1) but there are moments where he struggles to reign in his truest reactions to things i think LOL. he is also just very dramatic tbf ☝️

his other vague neuroticisms but specifically commenting when things aren't Correct or Right or Safe including complaining about the sterility of the needle he was being injected with mid TORTURE

when he defaults to sports metaphors bc that's the easiest thing he can relate to in s2. god

100% of autistic people i talk to about this all go OH YEAH he's so autistic. tbh i think autistic people relating to a character can be enough of a diagnosis to me. peer diagnosis...

i just think so :)

in conclusion...

#steve harrington #🍦#WARNING . this is like 3k #sts

362 notes · View notes

wooahaes · 10 months

Text

under the sun [joshua]

pairing: non-idol!joshua x gn!reader

prompt: darl+ing inspired fic.

word count: 11.4k~

warnings: slightly suggestive at the very very end, but its left up to interpretation whether anything happens!! (its just two idiots in love making out for a minute). so, so much skinship and platonic-ish kisses between joshua and reader throughout. depictions of nightmares + mentions of vague illness and injuries within said nightmares. food mentions. more straight forward, flirty joshua throughout fic. mentions of joshua being mr gentle sexy.

daisy’s notes: men i am down bad for after writing this........ also sorry to anyone who asked to be tagged but wasn’t: several names didn’t pop up when i tried to @ them !! (plus tumblr for some reason hates when i try to have a taglist so if it DOES show that u were @-ed but didnt receive a notif, im so sorry!! ive had this issue for a while and i have no idea how to fix it...)

< day 3 || masterlist ||

summary: It all starts when you wake up in a field without a name or any memories to define yourself with. Thirteen men take you in as one of their own, and slowly you begin to wonder what is going on within this world… and between you and one of them.

It wouldn’t be wrong to say that Joshua already had a soft spot for you.

This, however, was normal in his eyes. Every time a new person came from maybe either Soonyoung or Wonwoo onward, Joshua found himself doting on people a little extra. When Jun came, it simply felt like they were a tiny group of people living together. But something about that number ticking over from four to five or five to six felt... More, in a way. Although he didn’t dote heavily on Soonyoung, or Wonwoo for that matter, his affections were obvious from day one. The amusement he found in Soonyoung’s jokes, the gentle way Joshua made sure to keep Wonwoo (and later Jihoon, Minghao, and occasionally Hansol when he wasn’t feeling the chattiest) acknowledged in conversations (never forcing them to speak, but making sure they felt regarded as a member of the group), his friendly competitions with the others... He found ways to make sure people felt involved. Jeonghan was better at listening and giving advice, Seungcheol’s job was to lead, and therefore Joshua kept people feeling loved. Whether that be with casual conversation or the occasional mischievous prank he pulled. With you, he expected more of the same: he would dote on you in the beginning, and then it would fade into that same love and care he provided everyone with. Truthfully, Joshua enjoyed caring for people. There was a reason he was called gentle sexy, after all (... even if it was semi self-imposed).

And at the end of your first week living with them, Joshua saw how stressed you were becoming for one reason or another. So he decided he’d get to the root of the problem sooner rather than later. Once he finished hanging laundry with you and the others, he offered up a little picnic lunch--just the two of you. He’d packed up the sandwiches someone else (Mingyu, he thought) had made, and sliced fruit for you. All that was left was for the two of you to find a nice spot to sit in. He carried his bag with food and water bottles inside of you, while you had been tasked with the very important job of carrying the blanket he’d found for you.

He’d suggested the spot the two of you eventually settled into: half underneath the shade of the tree, and half underneath the sunshine. He spread out the blanket for two of you, gazing up at the cloudy sky above for a moment. He looked at you after a moment, gently patting the spot next to him. Yet when you sat down, he didn’t notice the way he slightly shifted to be closer to you without much thought. It felt... natural in a strange way.

“Like my second day,” you mused aloud at one point as Joshua was pulling the securely wrapped food from his bag. He looked up with a hum, but realized what you meant a second later: the two of you had lazed together under the sky that day, too.

His fingers grazed against your own for a moment, acutely aware of how the side of your hand pressed against his own that day. “It wasn’t that long ago,” he gently teased, a warm chuckle escaping his throat. “But you already fit in with us.” Just like we knew you would, he wanted to say, but he held back. Would that be a little too bold to say...?

“I do?”

He smiled. “You do,” he said, his hand already finding a home with your own, your fingers already lacing together with his. “I wouldn’t lie. I think we all care about you a lot, even if it’s in different ways.”

He could see the way you bit back a thought. Absentmindedly, your thumb brushed over his.

“Even Jihoon and Minghao,” he told you. He noticed the way you raised your eyes, already caught. And oh how cute your expression was. Maybe he’d catch you in silly little moments like these again if he could see that wide-eyed look again. “They’re just taking their time. They were like this with Seungkwan and Chan, too.”

It didn’t take you long to piece together the missing name there. “What about Hansol?”

Joshua’s eyes seemed to light up a little as he smiled. “Jihoon liked him almost immediately,” he said, “but he’s the exception. Jihoon likes you enough, and so does Minghao. They just take a little longer to warm up to people.”

“What about Jun?”

“Jun’s looking out for you, too,” Joshua said. “He’s also a little quieter about it. But... you know that Chan likes you. So do Hansol and Seungkwan...” His thumb ran along the side of your hand. “And so do I.”

He could see a flustered smile cross your lips, and you turned your face away from him, looking to the sky instead. But you finally spoke a tiny, “Thank you,” a second later. He laughed a little, warm and vibrant, at how adorable you truly were.

“So... What else is inside that cute head?” He smiled at you, tilting his head as though it’d allow him to peer inside and see said thoughts. “Anything new?”

Your smile slowly dropped, and you let out a quiet sigh. “Nothing so far.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” he said, gently squeezing your hand. “It takes time. I think once you stop worrying about it so much, it’ll come to you.”

With another sigh, you turned back to face him again. “I don’t know how you do it.”

“It’s easy after a while,” he said, pulling his hand free from your own. He reached for the sandwiches he’d brought the two of you, offering one up. Your fingers grazed his again when you accepted it, and he turned his attention to unwrapping it slowly. “When you’ve been here as long as some of us have... You learn to accept each day for what it is.” He went quiet, staring down at his meal.

And you watched as proud, bright, warm Joshua turned into someone... quieter. Like the volume had been slowly turned down, number by number, until his melody could barely be heard while still being there. He said nothing for a moment, just staring blankly, brows drawing together as he gathered his thoughts.

“Sometimes... I pray,” he finally said. “And I think it helps. I grew up Catholic,” he looked back up at you, “That much I remember. I remember singing in church....” He went quiet again for a moment, idly pulling at a piece of the bread. “Singing’s really important to me, actually. Sometimes I don’t know why, but it is.”

You weren’t sure what to say to someone so pensive, so quiet compared to the version you knew most days. So you opted for what you knew was true: “You’re good at it.”

A smile crossed his face, even if it didn’t fully seem to be him again. “You’re sweet,” he said at first, eyes meeting yours after a second. This time, his smile actually met his eyes. “Thank you. But you should hear Seungkwan. And Seokmin, too,” he said, taking a bite of his sandwich, as if to distract himself from whatever thoughts had washed over him before. “Jeonghan and Jihoon are talented, too,” he said after swallowing his bite, “but you really, really need to hear how Seungkwan and Seokmin sound--especially if they sing together.”

That seemed to bring back the Joshua you were most familiar with. Not that you didn’t like this quieter, more thoughtful version of him: you thought that maybe, in time, you would learn how to speak to him in moments like that. It was strange, though... He always seemed so carefree so far, most days enjoying the freedom that this life could give him. It almost felt as though he was made for it. That wasn’t to say that you didn’t think Joshua could have those quieter moments: you were sure everyone there had them--even Soonyoung, who seemed to carry the most laughter with him, or Mingyu, who’s silly, goofy nature spoke for itself most days. Yet with Joshua... It felt as though you weren’t prepared to see that side of him peek out so soon.

It was cute, though, to see the way he happily hyped up the others and their talents. Soonyoung loved to dance--as did Jun, Minghao, and Chan, and Joshua was happy to sing the praises of everyone there. He’d let you see too much of himself, too soon. Maybe when the two of you were closer (and, truly, he hoped you would be), he would confide in you the way he confided in Jeonghan. He hoped you would feel the same safety in confiding in him, too: he might not be as warm as Jeonghan seemed to be, but he wanted to give you a warm place to land if you needed it, arms wide open and ready to embrace you when you needed it.

That night, he woke up from a far too vivid dream. The memory seemed to fade away soon, slipping from his grasp as he sat forward, a hand running through his hair. He’d been somewhere... crowded and loud, making his way through throngs of people. He remembered being approached, yet the face seemed... blurry and distant. Like he should remember it, but something in his mind refused to let him make out specific features.

“Joshua?” Jeonghan quietly mumbled from beside him, sleep laced into his voice. He stifled a yawn, reaching out to lay a hand on his arm. “Are you alright?”

He nodded, slowly settling back into bed as he turned onto his side. “Just had a weird dream,” he said. “Nothing bad. Don’t worry.”

Jeonghan accepted the answer easily enough, eyelids drooping shut as he snuggled back into the space next to him. He’d talk to him about it in the morning--no need to wake Jeonghan up over something so silly. He slipped back into slumber as easily as he had pulled his blanket back over him, and was left with nothing else he could remember that next morning. He made his way to breakfast with the others, stopping long enough to glance at himself in a mirror. He looked the same, so why did he feel so... Different?

He’d waved at you on his way in, and noticed your shy smile as you waved back before returning to your conversation with Seokmin. Joshua went to get a glass, his focus purely on getting a glass of water. Maybe that’d help settle him, centering him on something other than what he dreamed about last night. Seungcheol had stopped beside him, though, his own glass in hand.

“Everything okay?” He asked in a quiet voice. “I felt you jolt last night.”

“You did?” Joshua raised his eyes to meet Seungcheol’s. “Just had a weird dream. It felt... real.”

Seungcheol slowly nodded, taking in each word with care. “Like a memory?”

“I think so.” Joshua paused. Yet... The other memories never felt so vivid. Not like this. They felt real in the same sense, but what made this one feel so intense...?

He saw you again, giggling at something Seokmin had said, and he could see the way he pressed kisses into your cheek with a smile.

Well. There might be his why sitting right there. All that was left was to chase after it.

“Today, I’m going to teach you something very important.”

Joshua’s hand was holding yours as he walked alongside the river with you, more-so to guide you than his casual form of skinship. He’d invited you along with him for a small walk through nature--something he enjoyed doing on his own sometimes, but today wasn’t just leisure. He’d left you waiting in anticipation after he finally decided to break the news to you as to why he’d suddenly invited you out again barely a few days after your picnic.

“The art,” he said, with a purposeful pause to build suspense, “of living one day at a time.” He let go of your hand after a moment, slowing to a stop as he turned to you. “I think you could use it.”

He was slightly teasing you, and you could tell from the way he was smiling at you. Yet you agreed easily enough to ‘take these lessons,’ since he’d casually offered you a ‘once-in-a-lifetime deal’ when he invited you out earlier. If there was anything Joshua was good at, it was keeping you entertained. Whether that be through playing guitar or singing, or building up to moments like these... You definitely found him charming in plenty of ways.

“It’s hard,” he said, “but I learned a while back that it’s better to accept each day as they come. It helped me relax, at least--and it helped a few of the others, so I think I’m an expert now.”

Charming and cheeky. A deadly combination, in your humble opinion, but you liked Joshua’s company too much. If he would be the death of you, then c’est la vie... At least Chan would hopefully avenge you, maybe with Seungkwan and Hansol at his side.

(Not that you had any worries with Joshua: he was strong and safe in the same way the others were. The only fear you truly ever could have was of impending heartbreak, if you let yourself fall for his charms.)

Joshua drifted away from you, plucking a few flowers from the ground before he turned back to you. “There’s a lot of beauty in nature. I think I knew it before, but living here really makes you appreciate it a lot more.” He made his way over, carefully placing the flower behind your ear.

It was at this point that you realized he’d placed the other behind his own, and he smiled at the way the two of you matched now: little yellow flowers almost making it seem like the two of you were a pair. He turned, starting off talking about his own walks he goes on sometimes, enjoying the scenery even though he’s seen it an endless amount of times by now, and you followed behind him like a duckling.

Eventually, he found a spot to sit. He nodded toward the spot next to him, the corners of his lips slightly upturned as he watched you sink down into the spot next to him.

“What do you see?”

You raised a brow at him. What?

“Humor me,” he said. “Just tell me what you can see.”

So with a long exhale, you looked around, and began to list off things. The river ahead of you, stretching toward the lake at the end of this path. The trees that surrounded both of you, having reached the more wooded area. If you looked close enough, you could see fish underneath the water, scales shimmering in the sunlight that peeked through the trees. Tiny flowers dotting amongst the grass: some pink, some white... and others yellow, like the ones you and Joshua still had behind your ears.

Your eyes trailed him up. “I see you, too,” you said after a moment.

It earned a smile from him. “Well,” he said, “I see you as well. Now tell me what you can hear.”

Part of you wanted to roll your eyes. It felt like the kind of lesson you might have as a child learning about their senses for the first time, but you began to list off things nevertheless. The sound of water rushing past (and, if you listened closer, you could hear a fish leap and land in the water again), the sound of birds fluttering through the trees. Joshua’s breathing. The wind as it rustled leaves. Your own quiet breathing, too. Part of you wondered if you could hear the others, had you been close enough to home: the sound of Jun’s loud laughter, or Seungkwan ranting at something Soonyoung joked about...

And when he prompted you next, you continued on: you could smell the flowers, light and sweet on the breeze. Feel the way that the grass was poking into your skin, the feeling of the flower, weightless, behind your ear. The warm breeze as it kissed your skin. The warm feeling of his hand brushing against yours.

“That’s it,” he said in a low voice. “The art of living a day at a time.” He was smiling again, eyes twinkling. “Living in the present moment and accepting it as that. The book Wonwoo brought back called it mindfulness, but I prefer my name for it.”

You couldn’t help but smile back at him. Even if it was a mouthful... You thought you preferred his name for it, too.

The next day, you and Joshua were tasked with cooking dinner. Conversation always came easy with Joshua: even if you had moments of being unsure what to say, he could easily fill the air and keep things flowing as the two of you worked. He always seemed to use chores as a way of checking in with you, too, just to make sure you were adjusting well. He noticed how close you’d become with Seungkwan, Hansol, and Chan--although he’d noticed that a few others had a soft spot for you (namely Mingyu... and Seungcheol, but for the sake of his friendship, he’d leave his name out of it for now).

“Joshua?” You looked up from the veggies you’d been chopping for him, and he merely hummed in acknowledgement. “So... What started this whole ‘art of living one day at a time’ thing?”

He hummed to himself for a moment, mulling over the exact moment that led to it. He’d come up with the silly little name for it after he started practicing mindfulness, sure, but... “Sometimes,” he started, “I’ll get stuck in my own thoughts. It was maybe a few weeks before Jun showed up, but Cheol and Jeonghan took me out for a picnic. And--I dunno. We just sat together, just kinda observing how peaceful everything is.”

“So you had a picnic with your friends, and you started to appreciate... everything?”

Joshua nodded, not looking up from his work. “Yep. It helped.”

“Would you do that with me?”

He paused, turning to see that you’d grown more flustered at asking your question aloud. Before you could apologize and try to backtrack, he merely nodded, “Sure. I’d gladly steal you away for a picnic if you don’t mention it to anyone else.” He went back to stirring the pot, the scent of spices heavy in the air. “I like having alone time with you.”

His heart stirred at his own words, aware of what he meant: I like being the object of your attention.

Right as he went to apologize for being so forward, you spoke up, “Then you can’t tell anyone, either.“

Joshua’s eyes were shimmering as he turned to you again, sharing a smile between the two of you as he realized that maybe things weren’t so one-sided for him. “Then... We can call it a date. If you want.”

“And if I do?”

Oh. Oh. This felt... fast. “Then you can pick our spot.”

Two days later, Joshua let you take the lead, a basket and blanket in his hands as you lead the way outside. The two of you had agreed to a little picnic lunch together, to reduce any risk of someone trying to tag along with you. Everyone would be scattered now, doing their own things as Joshua let you take the lead. He could hear the sound of Seungkwan and Chan bickering in the attic as he climbed up and into the church, and the tell-tale sound of Hansol’s warm laugh at an argument that was anything but serious. The two of you had passed Mingyu and Wonwoo on your way out, and he’d seen Seokmin go searching for Jihoon with Minghao tailing alongside him. Some of the others must still be out, finishing up their chores for the day. Joshua saw Jun on the way out, making his way back inside with an empty basket from doing laundry in his arms, and merely gave him a small wave.

You guided him out and to the same shady spot he sat with you on your second day. Together, you spread the blanket out before sitting together, chatting idly for a while..

“Joshua?” You suddenly said. “Tell me what you can see.”

His eyes crinkled a little with delight. Oh, how cute of you. He began to list things in a calm, even tone: the trees that grow thicker down the path to the lake, the river that ran near the two of you (and the shimmering of scales that are easier to see now, with the sunlight hitting them), the pebbles that were pressed into the dirt. He could hear the sound of your breathing, leaves rustling, the babbling brook... And he could feel the plush fabric underneath the two of you, the warm breeze as it kissed his skin in a way he wished would be replaced by something (someone, his mind corrected) else...

And even though the two of you had moved on from that sense, he smiled as he looked at you: “And I see you.”

Over two weeks of you being there, and Joshua felt as though he’d fallen for you too quickly. Too easily. Maybe in another life, this would have taken far longer. He would have courted you the right way, with dinner dates and long walks where he had to build up the courage to ask if he could hold your hand (out of respect for you rather than insecurity for himself: not all people enjoyed the kind of casual skinship that Joshua often saw Seungkwan partake in with...well... everyone). Maybe he should have asked you on the walk back how you felt, exactly...Yet his confidence had dwindled slightly. He felt something for you, yes, but how was he to be sure that it was love?

So he’d give himself a little longer instead. Enough time to know for sure that the enamored feelings he was almost certain of were what he thought they were. Every time a new person came, there was always this honeymoon period of adoration for them. For Joshua, it was the warmth of a need to welcome and care for a new person, and he knew himself well: it’d only last a week or two, three at the most, before it became something comfortable in his chest rather than an ever present flutter that punctuated his every action. Even if his gaze would drift down to your lips (a sign, in his eyes, that this was not the normal love he felt for new people)... He needed time to be sure.

Barely into your third week of living with them, Joshua woke up to the sound of you panicking.

He was far from the first person awake, though. You had curled up across the room, happy to be in Seokmin’s warm embrace since he was feeling particularly cuddly tonight, and you’d startled several of the others closer to you. He jerked up, running a hand through his hair to comb it back to his face as he watched you panic. The others had already taken to comforting you to no success. Seokmin kept an arm around you, trying to calm you down while your words were slammed together in this endless dribble, like water from a faucet coming out all in one heavy blast. Chan had reached out, trying to take your hand and wipe your tears as you kept trying to talk about the dream you’d had. Seungkwan spoke over you plenty, alongside Minghao, as they all tried to get you to slow down and breathe. You could talk afterward, yet you didn’t seem to listen. All Joshua could tell was that you had fought with Minghao in this dream, and then you ran away and ended up hurt, terrified no one was coming for you.

He kicked off the blanket, pulling himself free from the space between Seungcheol and Jeonghan with ease. Several others had woken up at this point, too, and he could hear Seungcheol mumbling something to Jeonghan as he was roused, too. Joshua, on the other hand, was more focused on getting over to you, falling to his knees in front of you.

“Hey,” he said softly, “it’s okay. It’s okay,” he reached for your hands, and, through your tear-filled gaze, your eyes met his own. “I’m here--”

All within seconds, you’d begun to move in for comfort, and he easily pulled you into his chest. Soon enough, he had sunk down to where he was sitting, letting you sob into his shirt as he stroked your back. His head leaned against your own, eyes fluttering shut as he focused on comforting you.

“It’s okay,” he said again in that low, soothing voice, “I’m right here. Just breathe for me, darling, okay?”

As if the words finally broke through to you, this time carrying some meaning to them, you gave him a shaky nod before squeezing your eyes shut tight. Your breathing staggered, and Joshua began to take in slow, deep breaths with you. Just to make sure you didn’t feel like you were alone now. He raised his head as you kept breathing, and he looked around at the sea of concerned faces that surrounded him now. Some of them were still half asleep (Mingyu and Hansol, Joshua noticed, and maybe Soonyoung, too), but they’d gathered around. They were a community, after all. This was far from the first time someone had a bad enough dream to evoke such a strong reaction (Joshua remembered plenty of incidents right offhand), and it created this understood feeling between them all: we check on each other, and we go from there. If you didn’t want to talk, they wouldn’t force you to.

You had realized that you disturbed everyone soon enough, and already began to apologize over and over, trying to make up a good enough reason to justify getting so upset over a bad dream. Joshua gently shushed you instead.

“It’s okay,” he repeated again. “You just had a bad dream. It happens to all of us.”

Which was enough to prompt Chan into bringing up how he woke up with a scream his first week there. He couldn’t remember what the dream was anymore, but it was bad enough that the others had to calm him down, too. He thought it was something to do with his life before, but Joshua remembered what it was. Chan had dreamed that he’d been kicked out of the group because he failed them in some way. Seokmin reached over, taking your hand in his, gently running his thumb across your knuckles as he shared his own story: he fought with Mingyu early into the latter’s first days with the group, and had a bad dream a while after of the fight getting worse.

They shared their pain with you without reluctance. They were human, too, after all: they had bad dreams and bad mornings, and sometimes they’d wake up crying like this too. Joshua just cradled you to his chest the entire time, though, tracing slow circles onto your back as you listened. Despite the stories being shared, you didn’t share your own now that you were calm enough that you could get it across better. No one pushed you to, though, past Wonwoo’s gentle question of whether you wanted to talk about it more. You had shook your head, curling up closer to Joshua before saying that you felt better now, thanks to all of them. They’d all started to go back to bed, Seungkwan telling you to wake him up if you needed to talk; he would happily listen if you needed him (or the two of you could go on a walk, too, if that’d help).

Joshua gently nudged you to get your attention. “What do you want now?” He asked softly. “You wanna go back to bed? I can get you some water if you want.”

You shook your head. “Can... Can I sleep with you, actually? You holding me helps...”

The surprise of your request made him grow a little flustered. He’d always be open to cuddling with you, but for you to say something like that...

He nodded, though, and brought you back over to where he’d been sleeping. Seungcheol wordlessly shifted over to make room for you, already grabbing extra pillows and blankets to help make you as comfortable as possible. Soon enough, you were curled up in Joshua’s arms again.

Over your head, Joshua had met Jeonghan’s gaze. His eyes flickered down to you for just a moment, and Joshua...

Well. He knew what Jeonghan was trying to ask. He merely nodded, and he watched as his friend nodded in return, understanding. A moment later, he’d seen the way you shivered slightly, and Jeonghan slid a little closer to ensure that you would be warm between the two of them.

Joshua loved you. Plain and simple. And now he was sure that both Jeonghan and Seungcheol knew (as well as every other person in that room). Everyone but you, hopefully. If he was going to tell you soon (and he would, he knew he would if he thought he had a chance), he wanted to do it right. But only when you were ready for that kind of relationship with him.

(And maybe he should call it overconfidence, but... Joshua had a pretty strong feeling that you loved him back.)

As much as Joshua didn’t want to leave you the next morning, it was Mingyu who gently nudged him awake, asking in a low voice if he’d come help with breakfast. He agreed, watching you sleep for a moment longer after Mingyu left him, and he slowly untangled himself from him. When you began to stir away, he gently shushed you, pressing a kiss to your forehead as he told you to go back to sleep for a little longer. You’d ended up turning over, reaching over for Seungcheol, who barely roused before he cuddled a little closer to give you further comfort. Joshua pulled himself from his blankets, watching the wordless way that Jeonghan filled the space he was leaving, eyes meeting his for a second in a silent go on, I’ve got them.

Mingyu was already working on breakfast when Joshua came in, his conversation with Seokmin coming to a halt. The two greeted him casually enough, and Joshua was put to work soon enough.

“Josh?” Seokmin said after a few minutes, earning a glance from him. “You and Mouse...”

Joshua said nothing at first, working on. Oh. It must be obvious now, then. Is this something he’ll have to address with everyone? “We’re only friends.”

“We know,” Mingyu said. “That’s not what we’re asking.”

You don’t need me to say it out loud, Joshua wanted to say. Because they knew: everyone had to, right? Last night was just... proof that the initial affection he held for you within your first days never went away. That it merely blossomed into something stronger. Barely a few weeks into you living with them, and you’d somehow captured his heart so easily. He didn’t want to call it all-out love, because love took longer to sow. Infatuation fit better. He, for the lack of a better word between “infatuation” and “love,” liked you.. a lot.

He waited until everyone, save for you, had filed in for breakfast. They were quiet, a few whispers about you flying around the table, and Joshua... Well. Joshua wasn’t an idiot: he saw the concerned glances people kept sending him. The way no one addressed him, but kept clearly talking about him.

And then he finally spoke up, “Don’t tell them.”

No one spoke. They merely exchanged looks, all knowing at this point.

“Not now,” Joshua said. “I’ll tell them when they’re ready. I’m not putting that burden on them this soon.”

It was still tense, but Seungkwan was the one who finally looked up from his breakfast. “Joshua... I think they like you, too.”

He wanted to say something. Anything. His face grew warmer at someone actually speaking the thought aloud. He thought you did, too: but he didn’t want to define your feelings in his mind. It would set expectations on you that he wasn’t comfortable setting: if you liked him back, then he’d want to hear you say it out loud. Not now, of course, but when you were feeling better. He knew the effects of a shitty dream all too well.

Chan barely touched his food before he excused himself, saying something about taking a walk before he’d start on his share of the chores. Joshua saw the concerned look Hansol and Seungkwan shared, and the gentle nod toward where Chan had left that Seungcheol gave them: go on. The two excused themselves as well, getting up and following after him quickly.

Joshua wasn’t an idiot. He knew he wasn’t the only person who felt more for you. He knew Chan did. He thought Cheol did, too, but Joshua knew that neither would stand in your way of pursuing who you loved. Whether it be them or someone else, they would accept it and learn how to move past their feelings. Joshua would do the same, after all. He loved you and your happiness. And if you would be happier with someone else.. Then Joshua would support you wholeheartedly while he took the time to heal.

That’s what love was supposed to be, wasn’t it?

Something weighed in the pit of your stomach for most of that day. Everyone had been concerned at breakfast that morning (which, to be fair, hadn’t surprised you in the slightest), and you had waved them off. You weren’t ready to talk about your dream quite yet, not until you tried to focus on the center of it all. By some stroke of luck, you’d found Minghao painting by himself--sitting at a bare space of wall that’d only been painted green in preparation. He’d been painting a circle of blue, merely glancing up as you came closer before greeting you casually enough.

You slowly sank down next to him when he invited you to. “Um... Minghao?”

He heard the caution in your voice, and it made him lower his brush, turning to you. “Is something wrong?”

“Did... Did I do something?” You said slowly. “I mean. I don’t think I did, but--I had a dream that you were mad at me, and--and I just started overthinking and--”

“I’m not mad at you,” he said, plain and simple. For a moment, his gaze flickered past you, but before you could turn to see what he was looking at, he spoke up again. “If I was, you’d know. We’d talk about it eventually.”

Relief hit you all at once, and you let out a sigh. “Good...” You’d toyed with your sleeve, still feeling a slight nervous edge as you sat there with him. “I just... I had this dream where everyone seemed upset. But you--”

His gaze flickered up again, and then back to your face before he finally looked past you one final time. “Stop standing around and either sit with us or go.”

You turned, and Joshua had been lingering nearby. “Oh. Shua...”

“I can go--”

“No,” you said, “it’s okay. You can stay if you want. I don’t mind talking about it now.”

Joshua slowly nodded, making his way over before he sank down next to the two of you. He watched you for a moment, waiting to see if you would continue.

And soon enough, you did. “Anyway... I don’t know why everyone was upset, but you were the only one who spoke up and said whatever happened was my fault.”

Minghao furrowed his brow, looking up. “But you don’t know what happened?” When you shook your head, he continued. “I can’t say I wouldn’t be mad if something bad happened--”

“I ran away,” you said. “I don’t know why, but I just decided I’d leave for good since you all were better off before I came here.”

Joshua wasn’t sure what to say. He merely shared a concerned glance with Minghao, who, too, seemed to be at a loss for words.

“We love you,” was what Minghao said a second later, voice softer than before. “If something bad happened, we wouldn’t kick you out.”

“He’s right,” Joshua said. “We wouldn’t--”

“You didn’t,” you said. “I decided to just... Remove myself from the equation.”

That... was different, to be fair. But what could cause them all to be so upset that you felt that was the only option? To run away and live on your own instead? They were a community: no one should have to live a life of complete isolation. Seungcheol was always adamant about that after his own time alone.

“I know I wasn’t warm to you when you first came here,” Minghao said after a moment, “but I don’t want you to leave. You’re one of us now.”

With a slow nod, you let his words sink in. Us. Although you knew they’d all embraced you with open arms, letting you into this community, this family they had so lovingly come together to form... It still meant a lot to hear that you were a part of it. That they loved you.

Minghao looked back at the scene he’d been working on, pressing his lips together for a moment. “Do you have any ideas on what I should paint? I wanted to paint a pond, but...”

Joshua looked to you. “Mouse?”

“How about... ducks?” You suggested casually enough. “A little family of ducks.”

Minghao nodded after a moment, taking your suggestion into account before he began to wash his brush. “A family of ducks it is, then.”

You stood up, thanking Minghao for the talk as you went to leave him and Joshua behind. Yet Joshua rose quickly, following after you and stopping you once you were far enough to not be overheard by Minghao.

“Did you have any more bad dreams?”

You shook your head. “I didn’t. Thank you for being there, though. It felt like cuddling with you was all I needed.”

He chuckled. “Well,” he said, “all you have to do is wake me up and I’ll be there from now.“ He took your hands in his, swinging them slightly. “I always have room for you, alright?”

Your nose had crinkled when you smiled, giggling. “I’ll keep that in mind.” You slowly let go, taking a drifting step back. “Thank you, Joshua. I’ll keep it in mind.”

It was strange. Sure enough, you woke up that next night, sobbing again. It wasn’t as bad as the first time, but Chan had woken up Joshua for you when you asked him to. Instead of merely trying to soothe you back to sleep then and there, he glanced around before he gently pulled you to your feet, guiding you out of the room to make both of you a warm cup of tea. He sat next to you, watching the slow sips you’d take, cheeks still wet with tears. Despite the urge to go ahead and ask, to figure out what upset you this time, he let you have your space. The tea seemed to calm your nerves, and he merely waited for you to make the next move: if you wanted to go back to bed, he’d offer the spot next to you again. Or you could go back to Chan, who Joshua was sure was still lying awake, waiting to know if you were fine. When you finally lifted your head, meeting his gaze, you asked to talk about it.

This time, your nightmare was about Wonwoo. He’d fallen sick--really, really sick--in your nightmare. You swore you could still feel his feverish skin from when you were checking his temperature. It was almost as if he was going to die, and the thought of that had been enough to throw you out of your dreams and back into the reality you were living in. Wonwoo was okay: that was something you could see when you first woke up. Chan had stirred, asking what was wrong, and you merely asked him to get Joshua.

“If it helps... No one’s ever been that sick before,” Joshua said, his hand on top of yours. His thumb grazed the back of your hand. “And we know how to take care of each other. I’m sure Wonwoo would have been okay.”

Something about his presence seemed to calm you easier than the others did. He sat with you a little longer until your cups of tea were empty, and soon enough he’d made a space for you once more, letting you curl up in his arms again.

The same happened the next night: Mingyu had burned his hand in that dream. The next, you were lost in the forest with an injured ankle and you were scared no one would come for you. In another, your shoulder had been injured horribly... And all Joshua could do was be there for you each night. Sometimes he’d make you tea, or the two of you would go on a short walk to clear your head, but it always ended up the same: with you in Joshua’s arms, feeling safer than you had been before. He would wake up the next morning, feeling the weight of your body against his, sleeping peacefully.

(You finally gave up after that night and started sleeping next to him permanently until you worked out whatever was causing these nightmares. Not that he was complaining: he liked having you close to him.)

Seungcheol had been watching you one night after dinner, while the group was all still together, biting his bottom lip. Joshua wondered if he thought he could figure you out had he stared intensely enough, studying your entirety as much as he could from his place across the room. Yet his calling of “Mouse,” had been enough to catch your attention, followed by, “are your dreams still bothering you?”

You looked up from the puzzle you were working on with Minghao and Seokmin, a little more flustered at the outright question. “Not really...”

“Aren’t dreams a subconscious thing?” Hansol said from his spot on the couch, curled up with Jihoon next to him. “Maybe you’re just worried about something.”

“I’m not,” you said, a little too quickly in Joshua’s opinion. “I just had a string of bad dreams. It’s nothing serious.”

“Are you sure?” Seokmin frowned. “You can talk to us--”

“I’m fine,” you said, standing up. “I’m gonna go wash up for bed.”

They let you go without a fight. No need to push you now when you were already starting to get upset. Joshua merely said he’d go try to talk to you, just to make sure you were fine--even if you weren’t ready to talk. He’d found you brushing your teeth, and you’d pouted a little at the sight of him in the entryway.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” you said after spitting into the sink. “Maybe tomorrow, Shua.”

He slowly drifted closer to you. “That’s okay,” he said, slowly stopping next to you. “Do you know what’s bothering you, though?”

Reluctantly, you nodded after a moment. “I think I do. But... I don’t wanna think deeply about it before bed.”

He could understand that. “As long as you aren’t bottling it up,” he said. “We love you a lot.” He reached out to brush a stray hair back into place, and his fingers lingered at your temple for a moment before he drew his hand back. “I just want you to know that.”

“I love you guys, too,” you met his gaze. “Really, Joshua. I’m okay for tonight.” You leaned in, pressing a tiny kiss against his cheek. “Just tired from doing laundry with Soonyoung and Seungkwan earlier.”

He chuckled airily, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “I understand. Just don’t be afraid to tell us things, alright?”

“I won’t.” You promised. “Goodnight, Joshua.”

With you heading to bed early, Joshua... knew what he needed to do. The group was starting to disperse when he returned, and he went ahead to stop Chan before he could go with the others.

“I was thinking about going for a walk,” he said. “Do you want to join me?”

Chan shook his head. “I’m good, Shua. Thank you--”

“Chan,” he said, a little more serious this time. “I think you should.”

Chan looked toward the others, and let out a sigh, before nodding. He understood what this was, and the two of them grabbed their shoes and began to make their way outside. Once the church doors were securely closed behind them, Joshua let out a sigh and looked up to the stars overheard, twinkling in the clear, dark sky... and then he nodded out toward the river. He and Chan walked in silence at first, making their way down the hill with slow, heavy steps, neither sure how to begin this conversation.

“I really like them,” Joshua said outright. “And I know other people do, too. In the same way, I mean.”

Chan didn’t look at him at first. “I know. I was there when you asked us not to tell them how you feel.”

“I just want to clear the air,” Joshua said, “because I know you love them, too.”

Chan met his gaze, and Joshua could see something (confidence, perhaps) waver in his eyes. He opened his mouth to speak, only to close it, looking away. “We’re all adults here,” he said. “I’m not going to treat either of you differently.”

“I know that,” Joshua said. “I trust you. But I don’t want any bad blood between us... and I don’t want to hurt your friendship with Mouse, either.”

With a heavy sigh, Chan shut his eyes for a moment, slowing to a stop. “As long as they’re happy, then I’m happy. I love them, Joshua, and I want them to be happy.” He shoved his hands into his pockets, turning away again to kick at a pebble along the riverside. “I’d be happy no matter who they love. It’s not like they can date all of us.”

“Can’t they?” Joshua said, only slightly teasing. “You know how we are with each other. I think if we all wanted that, we’d work it out.”

Chan’s face grew bright red, even in the low light. “Don’t say things like that!” He said, pouting, “I--I don’t want to think about it when they only like you.”

“Sorry,” he chuckled. “I mean it, though. We’re all more than just a group of people living together, though. Who knows,” he shrugged, “maybe in another life, we’d all be something together.”

“Maybe.” Chan sounded wistful as he stared off into the distance. “But they love you.”

But they love me, Joshua repeated mentally, turning the phrase over in his mind over and over. You loved him... “I think they do--”

“I know they do.” Chan said. “It’s kind of obvious now.” He pulled his hands from his pockets, looking back to the church. The two began their return up the hill, faster this time to get back inside now that they’ve cleared the air. “Are you going to talk to Cheol, too?” He paused, “I mean... It’s obvious. Isn’t it?”

Joshua let out a warm chuckle as he pulled open the doors. It was a bit obvious that Seungcheol felt... a lot for you. “It is. I’m not sure I’ll talk to him, though.”

“Why?”

“You admitted to your feelings,” Joshua said, following Chan inside as he turned to secure the door. “Cheol is the kind of person who’d rather deny them either until his feelings are gone or until the world ends if it meant they’d be happy. He’s just going to give them up--”

“And I will.” Seungcheol stood up from his chair, making his way over. “Are you two really talking about me?” He chuckled a little at the startled expression on Chan’s face. “It’s fine, Chan. Hansol mentioned the two of you left, and I had an idea why.”

“So you decided to just wait in the dark to scare us?”

Seungcheol shrugged. “I thought it’d be funny. And it was,” he nodded toward Chan, “very funny to see his face--”

“But that’s not fair!” Chan suddenly cut in. “Cheol... It’s not fair that you have to give up your feelings.”

“Isn’t that what you’re doing?”

Chan stammered for a moment, “I--But--It’s not--” And then stopped, collecting himself. “It is, but... You give up a lot for us already.”

“They don’t love me,” Seungcheol said, plain and simple. A fact that he had long since accepted. “They love Joshua. We’re both giving up our feelings because we care about them and want to see them happy.”

Joshua felt his heart sink a little. While Joshua would have done the same for you... It felt awful to hear it said aloud, especially from someone who felt so much for you. “Cheol--”

“It’s silly,” he said. “How hard I fell and how fast it happened... But they love you, Joshua. And I know you love them, too.”

Joshua wasn’t sure what to say. “Cheol, I’m--”

“Take care of them.” Seungcheol tucked his hands into his pockets. “I know they’ll do the same.” He turned, musing aloud, “You know who to see about signing up to perform on their day...”

So Joshua nodded, already knowing what he needed to do. Chan walked ahead, following after Seungcheol. He needed to tell you soon, but... Surely, you could wait a little longer, couldn’t you? Just long enough for him to say it the way he felt he needed to. He made his way down, through the long passage until he came into the main room... Where Jihoon had been curled up, reading a book on the couch, humming to himself as he drummed his fingers against the edge. He wasn’t tired yet, but Joshua knew he wouldn’t go to his guitar until he couldn’t hold back anymore. He called out to Jihoon, already bringing up the song they’d been working on with Jeonghan and how he was going to try and finish it. He’d need help with getting it right, but...

Joshua knew how to make his feelings for you clear. Even if you couldn’t answer him in the moment, he’d sing it proudly, just so you knew where his heart fell.

Sometimes, all you had to do to find Joshua was follow the sound of a guitar being played. It always would lead you either to him or to Jihoon (or, rarely, Hansol), and once you came close enough, you’d be able to hear the soft way he mumbled his way through lyrics as he tried to figure them out. You peered around the entryway to the room he was in, watching the way he quietly worked on. He’d yet to notice you, and you watched the way his fingers moved to make each chord. Something about the way the sunlight flooded into the room and illuminated him made it feel as though you were looking in on a masterpiece. If only you could paint it--committing it to memory didn’t feel like it was enough to capture his beauty. Those soft brown locks fell into his face, eyes half-lidded as the lyrics he were working through (Should I talk to you or not? / I thought for a while...) barely audible. Was this, you wondered, what Eurydice felt when she looked upon Orpheus? Or how the stones felt when he traveled to bring her back, parting the way with ease, so moved by his song? Even if you couldn’t hear every word he sang, there was something so genuinely beautiful about how he seemed to lose himself in his music. It was similar to the way Jihoon did, too, as well as Hansol: they loved it so deeply, it was as though they were meant to sing in some way. Like music was one of their greatest loves, and it’d be cruel to abandon it completely.

Joshua looked up soon enough, though, and the music stopped as those pretty eyes softened when they saw you. “Hello, darling,” he called out, thoroughly amused that he had caught you observing him. It was just as love-filled as when he called you that during your second day there, too. “You can come in, if you want.”

As if bewitched to move from your place, you drifted across the room toward him, heart guiding you more than anything. Joshua always seemed to have room for you, no matter where he was: there was space by his side at dinner, at bedtime, or in conversations... and even now, when it was the two of you alone, he was happy to bring you in.

“Do you know how to play?” He asked, turning his attention to tuning his guitar--one of the chords must have been slightly off, since he’d kept trying to tune and retune it as he worked.

You shake your head. “Hansol offered to teach me once, actually,” you watched as he worked on, humming in acknowledgement.

“And?”

“I turned him down.”

Joshua lifted his head, this pretty, amused glimmer in his eyes. “You don’t want to spend time with Hansol?”

With a giggle, you gently bumped your shoulder into his. “Of course I do. I’d just... rather learn from someone else.”

He merely chuckled. “I see.”

Wordlessly, as he finally finished tuning the guitar, Joshua moved in closer to you so that he could reach around you. He brought in your hand to lay on the strings, the weight of it mostly on him still. His fingers are rough as they guide yours into place, and it made you wonder how long he’d been playing guitar.

“This is how you do Em...” His breath hit the back of your ear, and he paused to make sure you were pressing down the strings firmly enough. Then he strummed, and you could feel the vibrations through those strings. “Hear that?” He said, and when you looked at his face again, you could see this proud glimmer in his eyes. “And if you move your fingers to these chords,” he was already moving on, “you can get C...”

Joshua gently instructed you as he could. Em to C to G to D, always guiding your fingers and helping you keep them in place, and punctuating each with a strum to let you hear the difference.

“You’ll get better with time,” he said, “we’ll work on it.”

“So that means there’s a next time?”

He shifted away from you, returning to the position he’d been sitting in before you came. “If you want there to be one. I like spending time with you, you know.”

“Good.” You rested against his side. “I like spending time with you, too.”

He chuckled warmly. “I won’t tell Hansol you said that--”

When you whined his name, he merely laughed a little more, head tilting back as his eyes scrunched up with joy. Yet soon enough, he went back to what he was working on, no longer softly singing lyrics under his breath. He merely hummed along, trying to figure out the part he was working on.

“Y’know...” You began to toy with a stray strand of thread on your sleeve. “I talked to Cheol yesterday.”

“Mhm?”

For a moment, you weren’t sure how to bring it up. So you sucked in a quiet breath, before finally looking up to watch his face and try to gauge his reaction. “Joshua. What do you think love is like?”

He didn’t seem to hesitate. “I think it’s putting someone else’s needs before your own. Wanting to be close to them, too. Caring for them in a way that’s different than caring for other people.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but he continued to speak:

“It’s the way you make me feel,” he said outright, voice softer this time, as if someone would overhear if he said it any louder. He watched the way you went wide-eyed in response, clearly not expecting him to be so forward. “I was going to tell you differently. I mean, I still will, but--”

“You love me?”

He grew surprisingly sheepish, averting his gaze before giving you the tiniest nod. Strong, warm, outgoing Joshua had been reduced to a shy schoolboy because of one little question from you. “I think I do.”

His heart hammered in his chest, and he felt as though you could hear it from how silent the room had become.

“Oh.” It wasn’t flat. Or disappointed. It was warm, and a little confused, but he could hear the tiniest thread of joy laced into it. You gently bumped against his shoulder again. “Do you want to know how I feel?”

“I do,” he said, “but...” He met your eyes again. “Will you wait?”

... Wait? You’d thought that waiting was a little pointless when the fourteen of you were living this life together. What if things were over tomorrow? Why wait forever? Wasn’t that what Seungcheol told you, too? That you shouldn’t wait to confess to him? “Why?”

“I want to say it right,” he reached out, setting his hand over yours. “Okay? Let me sweep you off your feet.”

He didn’t expect you to laugh so warmly, so full of love at how cute he truly could be. “Okay,” you said, this teasing lift to your voice something he thought you’d gotten from hanging around him so much. “Then do it.”

Joshua set aside the guitar. He stood up, turning to you and offering his hand, and he nearly chuckled at your startled reaction.

“Wait, now?!”

“Nope,” he smiled. “You’ll just have to wait for what I have planned.” He nodded his head toward the doorway, “But I don’t want to give up alone time with you yet. Do you?”

You didn’t, either. With a smile, you accepted his hand, and happily let him lead the way. Although a few others had greeted the two of you, inviting you into a game, Joshua merely told them that the two of you had already decided to go for a walk together. Before someone could try to tag along, he’d already swept you away, happy to steal you all for himself for a bit. Not that he was the only one being greedy: you liked having Joshua all to yourself, too. The way he loosely intertwined his fingers with your own, just enough to keep your hands together but not enough to trap you with him, was sweet. Although when you tightened your grip a little, just to squeeze his hand, he wordlessly squeezed back.

And if he let go of you, just to sit in a shady spot under a tree, who were you to say no when he happily offered the empty space next to him to you?

(Even if it would later net the two of you teasing from Jeonghan when he eventually found you together, hours before dinner rolled around, comfortably sleeping hand in hand.)

Celebrations were always a highlight of having this group. Yes, there was plenty of manual labor that came first... But it would always be worth it to see someone light up, getting attention dedicated to them for a night. If he could see the way you smiled every night for the rest of his life, he’d be happy with that alone. Chan had held your hand as he brought you in, bright petals filling the air as they welcomed you into the group officially. Seungkwan had placed the flower crown upon your head, lips grazing your cheek for just a second--just as everyone else did. Joshua let his lips linger against your skin for an extra second, and found himself feeling a little greedy for doing so... and for wishing that he could steal you away again. He nodded along as Seungcheol eventually did his usual toast, and smiled at the sight of Chan with his arm around your shoulder, ever the dutiful best friend to you. It was clear that everyone there loved you. If nothing else, Joshua knew that you would be loved no matter what. And if his love for you faded into something akin to friendship, it’d still be love nonetheless.

Soonyoung, Seokmin, and Seungkwan had performed their little song and dance routine--and Joshua had beamed the entire time. Maybe it was because you eventually settled into the seat next to him, letting him drape an arm around the back of your chair and press his side against yours. He loved the sound of your laugh, so full of genuine love for the three as they performed. Jihoon performed a medley of his songs--some new, some old, but these medleys were normal for him. Even with broken leftovers of songs he could never find it in him to complete, Jihoon made a complete experience for everyone to enjoy. Even Hansol had a song to perform, incomplete yet so uniquely him. Jun’s monologue had been written by him, Minghao’s art piece unveiled in the same dramatic flair that he always did...

Joshua pressed a kiss right in front of your ear. “Wait for me,” he said, getting up, “This is for you.”

He watched the realization cross your face as he drifted away, getting a guitar as Jeonghan came to join him. He let Jeonghan introduce the song as he prepped the stage: it was something the two of them had worked on with Jihoon, yet only recently finished together. Soon, he was sitting on one stool with Jeonghan on the other, already playing. You recognized the song soon: it’d been the one he had practiced when he told you that he thought he loved you.

I’m falling for you / falling for you... / it’s too late to escape

(And Joshua, in that moment, was certain he never wanted to. Especially when he fell asleep next to you, smiling at your sleeping face and caressing the white rose that Jeonghan had painted onto your skin.)

The song had been part one. Part two began the next day, before most of the others were asleep. He’d departed from your side early--not early enough to beat the others, but early enough that you were still comfortable in your bed. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, already moving to make his plans. He’d be making dinner with Seokmin and Mingyu tonight, and that meant he could get everything ready without looking too obvious.

It would be hard to avoid you for most of the day, but the others were a welcome help. Jeonghan would point you to him when the time came, but Seungkwan, Hansol, and Chan had been tasked with distracting you for the rest of the day. That meant staying away from the garden once chores were over, and letting him take the time to make everything perfect. From the string lights that Seungkwan had found for him to the plush blanket he spread out onto the ground... He had to make this perfect.

Seungcheol had found him while he was working. “You’re telling them, right?”

He smiled. “Is it so wrong to make it romantic?”

“No,” he said, leaning against a tree. “Like I told you... Take care of them.”

“I will--”

Yet he had let out a loud, long sigh. “Seriously... They’ve been staring at you for the past few days. How can you not say something sooner? I think I’d break if they looked at me like that.”

Joshua felt the opposite, actually: Seungcheol was in love with the group. It’d take a miracle for him to tell you how he felt, and even then... He’d probably take a thousand years to do it, too. Not when it made him look as though he was playing favorites. Joshua wondered, for a moment, if that was why Seungcheol seemed so okay to give up his love for you. To let you be happy with someone else. He pushed the thought away: maybe, in another world, Seungcheol wouldn’t have to struggle with his feelings... It made Joshua feel guilty, for a moment. But he reminded himself what they both knew: you loved Joshua.

(In another world, if you loved everyone alongside him... Joshua thought he could live with that. He loved everyone else, too, after all.)

He returned inside to bring out the picnic dinner, dessert packed as well in the form of sliced fruit. Especially strawberries, which he had carefully cut the tops off of and sliced in half. It was a simple enough gesture, but one he hoped you would love.

And when you finally came to him, you laughed. “Seungkwan refused to let me leave him until Chan finally told me what was going on.”

Joshua had been sitting on the blanket, but he rose to his feet, hands outstretched for you. “Does that mean you wanted to see me?”

“Silly...” You placed your hands in his. “I’ve been dying to talk to you all day.” With ease, you slipped your fingers in-between his. “About the two of us.”

“Does that mean there is a ‘two of us?’”

He could see you grow flustered, averting your gaze for a moment as you pressed your lip together. “What do you want?”

Joshua began to lower himself down, bringing you with him to sit together. He let go just long enough to push things aside, scooting forward so that he could be closer to you. He gently took your hands in his again, squeezing them as he gathered his courage to say what he needed to say. He knew he felt something for you, that you felt something for him, and yet saying it out loud was scarier. It made it more real.

“I want us.” He ran his thumbs over your knuckles. “I want to love you while we have the chance. I’ve thought a lot about it, and... I don’t know what brought us here. I-I don’t know what brought you to me,” he squeezed your hands, “and I’m okay with whatever it is, no matter what it is. Because you’re here,” he reached forward, fingers curving around your cheek, “and I’m with you. And... And I think that’s where we’re supposed to be.”

“Joshua--”

“I love you.” His heart was racing as he said it. The words felt at home in his mouth. “And it’s okay if you can’t say it back. But... I think I’m yours if you want me to be--”

You’d lunged forward, kissing him hard and nearly sending him toppling back. His hands fly to steady you, and he shut his eyes as he kissed you back. You threaded a hand through his hair, the other cupping his cheek as you smiled into this kiss. Deep down, there was a tiny urge to just lean back. To let you take over and kiss him and... more, if you wanted it. He let his mind go blank for a moment, savoring how soft your lips felt against his own... And then he remembered.

“I,” he said as he gently pushed you back, smiling. His hair was a little messier now. “I made us dinner. And as much as I want to kiss you again...” He cupped your face, “I don’t want it going to waste.”

It earned a giggle from you, and you pecked him on the lips one quick, final time for now. “Right,” you said, leaning away. “We have time.”

That the two of you did. He’d already begun talking about how he’d been working on this earlier with the others, just to make something that would hopefully taste delicious. The others would be leaving you alone tonight, which was ideal. He wanted to be the sole object of your affections tonight and tomorrow and every day that came after, if you’d let him.

“Maybe that makes me selfish,” he said, drawing you in once more, “I can’t keep stealing you away forever, after all...”

Yet your lips slanted against his, and it made him feel free. Maybe he was never the one stealing you away. After all.. You’d stolen his heart within days of coming here. How could he steal you when he was always yours? He’d have to learn how to share you with the others again, the tiny need to keep you close to him building inside him. Just to link you to one another, like puzzle pieces that have fallen into place...

Truthfully, as long as you stood side by side with him in life... He would be happy no matter where you were. Alone or with the others, all he knew was that he wanted you with him until the end.

general taglist: @twancingyunhao @wonuziex @synthetickitsune @cinnamoroxie [unable to tag?] @cherryredcheol [unable to tag?] @gyulbabie

under the sun taglist: @shiningstar-byulxx @twogyuu @strawberri-uyu @bbmyungho @thedeeppoet @heeseung-lover686 @jeonncafe @bfwonu @fifty-shades-of-mischeif @blackwhiteandshadesofgradient @dreamhannies @yourfavoritefreakyhan @amethyistheart @jeonnyread @nap-of-a-starr @anidolecalledaoife [unable to tag?] @vernxnsfool

#wooahaes.fic #wooahaes.uts #seventeen imagine #seventeen x reader #seventeen x you #svt x reader #svt imagine #svt x you #joshua x reader #joshua hong x reader #joshua x you

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greeenchrysanthemums · 4 months

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I'm so sorry for the spam reblog of your GG rivals au stuff, but!!!! I'M SO. Ahem, I'm so so normal about it (<- lies).

I'm so curious how Gem got her start in the army and how she advanced rank seemingly so quickly! I mean I don't know the ages in this but I assume she's mayyybe in her late twenties? I dunno just a guess, but it also begs the question of when she joined? I mean you said that she always wanted to join the army so I'd imagine her joining at a similar age as Etho. Either way! Geminislay!

I just love this au so much! I'm gonna think about it all the time ♡

Hello! It's so exciting to get asks for this au! I'm so glad that people seem to like it so much. And not to worry, I quite enjoying seeing everyone being so excited about my au in my notifications. It is a delight.

As for your question:

She did join the army at around the same age Etho had, so maybe 16-17 (he is 9 or so years older than her here).

After leaving her hometown and enlisting, she became Impulse's squire. This was where she met Scott as well. He was a friend of Impulse's, and therefore she naturally seen a lot of him. They all grew close very quickly.

Right from the start, she showed exceptional swordsmanship, as well as brilliant organizational skills. She was quick-witted and a natural leader capable of taking charge in stressful situations, so her climb in rank was only natural.

Her first promotion was, coincidentally, because of Grian. She was only a few months into her stay at the castle when an explosion was set off in the courtyard and the weapons room was broken in to. While everyone else was panicked and unsure of what to do, she stepped up and led evacuation efforts before running off on her own to face Grian. She was the only one who managed to stop him from taking a great deal of weaponry, and even had him restrained for a period of time before he escaped. This bumped her right up into knighthood, where she was finally able to serve beside her friends instead of under them.

She would remain a knight for several years after that, and she was regularly assigned to deal with all things Grian since she seemed to be the only one capable of subduing him. It was never anything as grand as breaking into the castle again, but she helped stop her fair share of riots, and ran him out of town before he could start anything all together.

Her next major promotion wouldn't be until she was around 23-24. She ended up fighting in a war with a neighboring kingdom (more details on that another time, I do not want to spoil everything too quickly) in which she took charge of many battles, as well as worked with the previous commander to formulate strategies.

She was at first seen as arrogant and cocky by her peers for how quick she was to input her own ideas and boss them around, but that didn't last very long as it became evident that she knew what she was doing. In fact, she quickly became highly respected, maybe even a little feared, for how deadly and efficient she was.

Following the death of the previous commander during the war, Ren only saw it fit that he give the title and responsibilities over to her despite her young age. She had more than proved herself time and time again, and there was no one better for the job.

#geminitay #GG rivals au #life series #hermitcraft #and as the current story goes she would be around 28-29 #for the record I am not fully sure how the ranking system works for knights #all i know are squire knight and commander/general #my husband has tried many times to explain it to me (he inspired this au) but it just flies over my head for some reason #but accuracy isn't too important to me to be honest I am simply having fun #it is a made up world anyhow the ranking can be what I want of it #GG asks

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caelstyx · 20 days

Text

Urgent Call: Help Tareq & Dana to Evacuate Gaza

Please consider donating to their gofundme.

Here is there story:

Please read the following statement from my cousin in Gaza sheltering in the church. I pray you can help some of my family members living in Gaza. -Luna Saba Tarazi

Urgent call: Help Tareq and Dana Saba to evacuate Gaza & start over

Introducing us:

‏My name is Tareq Saba, I am 30 years old, a Christian Palestinian. I have lived all my life in Gaza and I have been working as a project coordinator in the humanitarian health field at Caritas Jerusalem in Gaza for the past 5 years.

‏A life that we have dedicated all of our efforts to build despite the difficulties and obstacles in Gaza has suddenly changed overnight. After October 2023, everything has changed, and a lot has been lost. It seems that a life within these walls is now impossible.

‏In the following lines you will learn of our story which after you read, we humbly hope you will lend us your helping hand to start anew.

‏In a warm day on May 2022, Dana and I got married surrounded by our family and friends. We built and designed our house with love and attention to detail. We had a peaceful life and a wonderful home. We had many dreams for our future together, and we dreamed of having a child to fill our lives with joy.

‏Our story and the impact of the war on our family:

‏Nothing remained the same after October the 7th. We learnt the meaning of loss as we lost everything we hold into. We lost our house, our jobs, our “normal” lives, and our dreams and aspirations.

‏One day we received instructions to evacuate our house. We evacuated with only a small bag containing our important papers, some clothes, and a small amount of money. Soon after it got heavily bombed and turned to rubbles of memories. We didn't know that we would never return to the place that held our dearest memories. So yes, we lost everything from the largest details to the smallest ones. And we went through terrible situations that I never thought I would ever experience.

‏It has been over 150 days since we sought refuge at the Church of St. Porphyrius in Gaza, which was not spared from shelling. We survived death several times!

‏Every day is harder than the one before. We fear for our lives due to the lack of basic necessities such as water, food, electricity, medicine, and more. Even the water is contaminated, and diseases and epidemics have spread everywhere.

‏My wife, Dana, was pregnant when the place where my family and I were staying in was targeted by a missile. We remained under the rubbles until we were miraculously rescued. All members of my family, my parents and close relatives, were injured and were transported to the hospital despite the difficulty of access during the shelling, but nothing beats the heartbreak I felt when my wife was injured and we lost our unborn baby.

‏Many of our relatives and friends were killed in this inhumane and unjustified shelling. Only a few of our belongings, lost under the rubble, were recovered. Now even our only “safe” refuge was targeted, and we have no other shelter!

‏I always imagine my baby as a boy while Dana insists they will be a girl but it doesn’t matter, I only prayed they will turn out healthy and safe, but yet again even these prayers were brutally snatched from our hands in front of our eyes and we couldn’t do anything, that’s how helpless I felt when we lost our unborn baby. It is said that the stress, fear, lack of nutrition, contaminated water, and phosphorus caused the miscarriage.

‏We had suffered a miscarriage before, but the pain doesn’t cascade by time, for months we lived through depression. The night we spent under rubbles was a miraculous night, it was impossible to survive under the unforgiving pressure of ruins and then reach the hospital under the heavy bombing but we did and Dana went through a surgery and received treatment.

‏Our house was targeted and destroyed by more than one missile, making it unfit for habitation. It was the dream house that we worked hard to own and design as we dreamed. It became ruins! These are some pictures of the house.

‏It takes one to see death eye to eye to realise the beauty of life. We felt at any moment that we would die, intensifying the reality that our children deserve to live in a place where they don’t wake up everyday to the fear of death and all their demands are met.

‏Dana and I are now back to square one. We lost all the savings of a lifetime and everything we owned in this war. I spent over $80,000 to build and design the house. Currently, the dream house is destroyed, our belongings, clothes, even our memories and beautiful moments were stolen from us. Gaza itself has changed forever, we lost streets, houses, shops, universities, hospitals, and our workplaces.

‏We have almost lost hope, but I believe that we should not despair. With your help, we can succeed. We can stay alive and provide a decent life for my family in a better place. Honestly, this is a real struggle that no one should have to go through.

‏How your fund will help us start anew:

‏Your donations will give our family the motivation to work hard for a fresh start. We have managed to obtain a temporary visa to Australia, and we pray that, with your generosity and assistance, we can raise the necessary funds to leave Gaza.

‏$10,000-12,000 for coordinating the exit through the Rafah border crossing in Egypt.

‏$5,000 for accommodation expenses in Egypt until departure to Australia.

‏$6,000 for plane tickets to leave Egypt.

‏The remaining amount will be used once we arrive in Australia to cover basic expenses such as housing, furniture, food, clothing, and other necessities until I can secure a job in Australia.

‏We know that no one can predict the situation in Gaza. If we cannot travel, whether due to lack of funds, travel risk, or change in accessibility, then we will use the funds collected to meet our needs and rebuild our lives here.

‏Dear friends, we only share our true personal story, and we hope and believe in your support. Every donation, no matter how small, can make a profound difference for us. Our only request remains peace, security, and safety, without fear, doubt, or disappointment, and that tranquility fills our hearts and we have a better future.

‏Whether you donated or not, it is a blessing to know someone out there cares enough to know your story, so Thank you for your time. Keep us in your prayers.

#palestine #mutual aid

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fuck-customers · 3 months

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https://www.tumblr.com/fuck-customers/740474153557164032/this-is-totally-a-dick-move-but-im-doing-it?source=share

I wanted to address a reply I saw on this post that I submitted. (I prefer to stay anonymous on the off-chance that someone could figure out who I am from my blog. The chance is EXTREMELY small, but if you read the original ask, you'll understand my concern)

Someone responded, saying that (I'm paraphrasing) by leaving negative reviews, I'm causing corporate to cut hours to my location even more and this is hurting me and I should instead leave fake positive reviews.

Ok I GET where you're coming from, I do, and I'm sure others have had that same thought. HOWEVER, as I said in my original post, I. WANT. THAT. STORE. TO BURN. I said in my original post that I've worked there several years (actually 4+ years more than any other employee at my particular location) and I've gotten shit on left and right. By the company, by management, and by customers and while I am looking for another job, it would make me SO happy to watch that shithole burn.

In the time I've worked there:

-My hours are always the first to be cut whenever "budget cuts" come around

-I regularly get scheduled closing shift when the other shifts CLEARLY have not done their tasks (as in I clocked in less than a minute ago and my manager can clearly see that the amount of work left could not physically be made in 1 minute) yet the manager is on my ass every few seconds to clean up after all of them and if my shift ends and I cannot finish, I get a talking to.

-I have been physically shoved by a manager and berated in front of coworkers and customers and that + the already stressful day I was having made me hide in the bathroom and cry. Then a few days later, another manager who wasn't even there that day heard about the incident (not the crying part-I hid) and made fun of me for a small mistake and said that I deserved the other manager yelling at me

-I spent my first year covering every single shift whenever asked and cross-trained myself so I could work in all departments and get more hours that way (🤡) only to be repaid by never getting promotions or raises (I did stop covering shifts after it was blatantly obvious that I would not get a raise/promotion/anything but taken advantage of)

-I worked the entire pandemic every day, almost to full-time, yet they refused to actually make me full-time, scheduling me just under (30-35 hours) so I was essentially working full-time hours without being able to get full-time benefits.

-An SM that worked there for a year apparently was threatened by me (though in no way was I after her job, I even repeatedly expressed that I had no interest in becoming management) and proceeded to fabricate an entire false story and reported it to HR as an EEOC issue in an attempt to get me fired

-Plus the multiple leads that have come and go that either treat all employees like dogshit and/or me, specifically. Talking down to me/us and snapping at me/us.

-Not to mention the disrespectful customers who see that I appear young and automatically assume I am stupid and/or incompetent, the most memorable experience being the old man who straight up asked me if I had brain damage and the (separate) old woman who straight up asked me if I was stupid and then immediately flat-out called me stupid to my face 10 seconds later.

PLUS: the store has been extremely noticeably not managed. We don't get enough hours to actually clean the store up and when I personally tried to start some cleanup projects on my own, I was actively discouraged and scolded by management. The place is a mess and actual customers have complained to me personally and other employees that I've witnessed about how shitty the store looks and how shitty the shopping experience is, so odds are, real customers are making the same reviews. I'm just filling in for those who lost their receipts.

ALSO: In the years I've worked there, I have seen several positive reviews from real customers, in fact the store used to have almost exclusively positive reviews, yet I never once saw any rewards from that. I even had customers personally go up to my manager and tell him how helpful and nice I was, blah, blah, blah and he came back and told me what the customers said and never once rewarded me and instead cut my hours when budget cuts came around.

Posted by admin Rodney.

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marie-swriting · 1 year

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After All These Years - Emily Prentiss

Masterlist

Summary : when you get a phone call from the hospital telling you Emily got hurt, you immediately drop everything to go check on her, even if it means seeing her again for the first time in ten years.

Warnings : mention of Emily getting beaten and shot, a small portion of angst, fluff, happy ending, maybe some grammatical mistakes as English is not my first language, tell me if you see some or if I missed any warnings.

Word count : 3.1k

French Version

Prompt : "They haven’t seen each other in a long time, but Person A realizes they are still Person B’s emergency contact, when they get a call from the hospital." number 3 from this prompt list made by @creativepromptsforwriting

Your phone rings while you’re walking to your car. Instinctively, you go through your purse before picking it up without checking the caller ID. When you hear an unknown voice answering you, you stop yourself abruptly giving the woman all your attention.

“Hello, this is the hospital, is it Y/N Y/L/N, Emily Prentiss’ emergency contact ?”

“Yes, it’s me. What happened to her ?” You question, panic can be detected in your voice.

“Miss Prentiss got beaten, she also got shot. Fortunately, we took charge of her just in time, but she needs to stay in the hospital tonight under observation.” She informs you and you sigh with relief.

“Got it, thanks for calling me. I’ll be there in thirty minutes.”

You hang up and run to your car. You throw your purse on the passenger seat and drive without wasting another second. When you’re at traffic lights, you call your boss to explain why you won’t be here. You try to drive carefully while going as fast as you can to the hospital. When you arrive, you park in the first spot you see before rushing to the reception desk. You identify yourself and the woman gives you directions to Emily’s room, you thank her and start running again to the third floor. In the elevator, you allow yourself to finally breathe calmly. Even if the nurse assured you Emily wasn’t in a life-threatening situation, you can’t help but have your anxiety eat you from inside. To this fear you can also add the fact you’re about to see Emily again for the first time in ten years. Even if your breakup was a general agreement, you still stress at the idea of finding yourself in the same room as her. She means a lot to you. You knew the day you broke up wouldn’t be the last day you’d see her, but you wouldn’t have imagined you’d see each other again because Emily would be at the hospital.

The elevator doors open and you trot around looking at every room’s number until you find the room 327. You lightly knock on the door and Emily’s voice invites you in. When she sees you, she frowns.

“Y/N, what are you doing here ?”

“Apparently, I’m still your emergency contact.” You answer laughing nervously.

“Oh… huh, sorry I didn’t think they’d call you while you were probably at work.” Emily apologises putting her hair back in place.

“Don’t worry, they called me before, I was able to come here quickly. Emily, I was so scared when I got the call”, you admit, getting closer to her, “Are you okay ? Are you hurt anywhere ?”

“They gave me pain-killers so I’m okay.”, she reassures you before showing you the chair next to the bed, “Please, sit.”

“Thanks.”

Once you’re seated, your gaze lands on Emily. You don’t even try to hide your concern while you’re searching for every wound on her body. You see several bruises on her face and her left arm in a sling. Notwithstanding she’s in front of you, alive you can’t help but imagine what could have happened if she hadn’t gotten this lucky. Lost in your thoughts while your eyes are still set on her wounds, your old fears about her job come back stronger with each passing minute. You also recall why you never liked her work in the first place when you were together.

“You can't stop thinking about it and say it, you know. You want me to quit.” Emily states, snapping you out of your mind.

“You love your job and we’re not together anymore, I’m no one to tell you this.”

“But you’d want it.”

Emily gives you a knowing look to let you know she doesn’t believe you. You don’t try to deny it anymore and avoid her eyes for a second before looking up again.

“I just want you to be safe.”, you clarify before marking a pause, “Besides even if I wanted to, I wouldn’t push you to quit. I know how important this job is for you, even if it can be dangerous. You also help to put murderers behind bars and save lives, it’d be stupid for me to tell you to stop. But I have to admit I’d be more reassured if your work didn’t involve bullets and serial killers.”

“If only it was possible !” She chuckles.

“The fact is, no matter what I think, what you do is important for you, that’s what matters to me…”, you add before taking her hand in yours, “just, be more careful next time. I don’t want another call like that anytime soon.”

“I’d do my best.”, Emily promises you with a smile, “Sorry for scaring you.”

“You’re okay, that’s what matters. Tell me if you need anything.” You say and you see her eyes brighten.

“Right now, I’d need your delicious cookies.”

“Too bad for you, I don’t have them.”, you inform laughing and she fakes a pout, “I didn’t plan on seeing you again today because you’d got hurt. But I can always go to the cafeteria to buy you some and tomorrow I could bake cookies and after you’d get back to yours, I’ll bring them to you.”

“You’re the best.” Emily exclaims.

You lightly squeeze her hand before taking your wallet and go buy some cookies. When you go back to her room, she holds out her valid arm to you with a big smile on her face. You give her the cookies and Emily starts eating them without wasting a second. She gives you some which you accept joyfully. You guys talk with you eat, trying to make up for lost time; at some points, you laugh and it feels like you never broke up. Your conversation seems natural just like the smile on your face. Despite the reason for your reunion, you haven’t been this happy in the last ten years.

When the sun comes down, a nurse knocks on the door. She quickly checks if Emily is okay before telling you you have to go because visiting hours are over.

“Would it be possible for me to stay, please ? I’m her fiancée, I don’t want to leave her alone for the night.”

“Oh, sure, no problems.”, she confirms before walking to the door, “Have a nice evening.”

“Fiancée, huh ?” Emily questions with a smirk once the nurse is out.

“It was the only way to make sure she’d allow me to stay.”, you defend yourself, “I think if I had said ‘ex’, she would have told me to leave right away.”

“She would have probably thought you were the crazy ex who would want to kill me during the night.”

“Probably.”, you laugh with Emily before paying more attention to her face. “Your eyes are bleary, you should go to sleep.”

“You’re right, but you’re not gonna stay on that uncomfortable chair, are you ?”

“They're probably gonna bring me a small bed or something. Go to sleep, don't worry.”

You see she’s skeptical but Emily is too exhausted to argue with you so she closes her eyes while you still hold her right hand and stroke it with your thumb. You keep looking at her while she’s slowly falling asleep. Your eyelids become heavier as well and you end up on the edge of the bed, your hand still holding Emily’s.

JJ opens the hospital room’s door and finds Emily peacefully sleeping with an unknown woman next to her. The raven-haired woman opens her eyes when she hears the door closing although the blonde made sure to not make a sound. Emily greets her friend silently. She wants to run her hand on her face but your weight prevents her from doing it. She sets her gaze on you and shakes you with her hand under your body. When you stand back from your position after you’ve opened your eyes, her face is the first thing you see. Emily points behind you and you turn around, discovering JJ. Feeling the heat in your cheeks, you stand up and present her your hand.

“Hey, I’m Y/N, Emily’s…”, you start hesitating, “friend.”

“JJ, I’m her colleague.”, she greets you by shaking your hand before turning back to Emily, “They told me they were gonna check on you one last time before allowing you to leave. Do you want me to bring you back home like we planned or maybe you want to do it Y/N ?” JJ asks and you shake your head.

“You came here for this, I’m not gonna disturb your plans. Besides, I have cookies to bake, anyway.”

“Her cookies are the best.” Emily comments.

“So, I’m gonna go, but we will see each other later.” You inform them while you take your purse that was next to the chair.

“Sure.”

Automatically, you kiss Emily’s cheek and exit the room. When you close the door, your eyes go wide, realising what you just did. As for her, Emily almost forgot how to breathe, she was not expecting this more than nice touch.

“Oh, you’re so gonna tell me everything in the car.” JJ exclaims with excitement in her eyes.

When Emily is finally able to go home, the two women get in JJ’s car. On the way to Emily’s home, JJ waits before questioning her friend. Emily hopes she won’t have to talk about your relationship, not really knowing what to say. After ten minutes, JJ can’t hold it anymore.

“So, are you going to tell me what happened between you and your ‘friend’ Y/N or what ?”

“Nothing special.” Emily brushes it off.

“You were peacefully sleeping by her side and you literally froze when you felt her lips on your cheek. Something happened between you two.”

“We used to date ten years ago, that’s all.” Emily explains casually.

“Was it a long relationship ?”

“Five years.”

“Why did you guys break up ?” JJ questions, confused, “Because you clearly still have feelings for each other.”

“Because of my job.”, she says shifting in the seat, “I was always in another country or undercover so we couldn’t talk a lot for months and the rare period of time where I could go home, her job was taking all her time. It wasn’t ideal. We loved each other but it wasn’t working so we preferred to stop there before destroying what we had. I hadn’t seen her since our break up.”

“Why did she come to see you then ?”

“I still haven’t changed my emergency contact. At first, I didn’t want to do it and then I forgot about it and before yesterday, she never got a call whenever I’d get hurt. Needless to say I wasn’t expecting to see her yesterday, even if I’m more than happy about it.” Emily admits looking through the car window.

“That’s what I understood. While you were sleeping, you had a stupid smile on your face.”

“Did not !” She retorts, turning to her friend.

“Was just saying what I saw.”

By the end of the afternoon, you go to Emily’s, cookies in hands. JJ opens the door with a huge smile on her face. You give her one of the two tupperwares with some of your cookies that you made just for her.

“You shouldn't have.” JJ thanks you, touched by your gesture.

“I’m sure that since you’ve been working with her you’ve been having her back while you’re on the field, I had to give you something to thank you.” You explain genuinely.

“It’s teamwork. Tell me, would you be able to stay with Emily for the night ? I need to take care of my son.”

“If Emily doesn’t mind, sure no problems.”

“I’m sure she won't mind.”, she affirms, confident before taking her stuff, “I’ll let you tell her, I need to go. Have a nice night.”

JJ runs away while you’re still trying to grasp what just happened. When you regain your composure, you take off your shoes and find Emily lying down on her bed. When she sees you and your cookies, she raises a bit, inviting you to sit down next to her. She doesn’t wait before eating, closing her eyes as she enjoys the taste.

“My God, they’re even better than I remembered.”

“I admit I’ve had the time to improve the recipe since last time.”

“How did you do it ? It was already perfect.” Emily interrogates in disbelief.

“I have a secret ingredient.”

“Doesn’t matter what it is, it’s validated by me. Where’s JJ ?”

“She had to leave, she told me she had to take care of her son so it only will be me and you.”

When she hears your answer, Emily frowns. She knows for sure Will is home and he’s more than capable to take care of Henry. She thinks a little bit more and Emily understands JJ lied so she could spend some time with you. She holds herself back from rolling her eyes and tries to play it cool.

“Oh, nice then. It’ll be like old times.”

Since that night with Emily, you’re avoiding her. You know it might not be the more mature way to react but you don’t know what else to do. The night you spent together was special and ordinary at the same time. It was special because it was the first time you were alone with Emily since your breakup, but it was ordinary because you were acting as if you hadn’t stopped talking to each other ten years ago. Contrary to what you thought, your feelings are still here and just as strong. You have always known you’d have affection for Emily until your last breath, you just can’t say without being wrong you’re still in love with her. You tried to not let it show yet Emily knows you like the back of her hand. You just hope with time she forgot your tells but being a profiler gives her an advantage. You are not sure if she noticed something, she has not said anything ; and, if she did notice, she might have not said something because, maybe, despite what she probably feels for you, she still does not wish to be with you again.. You don’t know which one is the real reason and you don’t want to know, especially if it can break your heart.

Therefore, you resumed your life like before. You go to work, you go back to your apartment and you watch your usual tv shows. However, when you’re in front of your screen, you zone out too much, you start thinking about Emily without realising it. You mentally try to get back on top of your feelings. You can’t allow yourself to fall back into her arms, she won’t be here to catch you. You need to do what you should have done many years ago : forget her.

You come home from work, exhausted from your day. Your only wish, to put your pyjamas on and lay down on your couch. You mentally plan everything you’re going to do tonight to save your energy. However your planning comes to a stop when you find Emily knocking on your door. You pause just to make sure your eyes are not playing a trick on you. When she hears you coming from behind her, Emily turns around to you. She waves at you with her valid hand before smiling awkwardly.

“Em, what are you doing here ? And how did you get my address ? I moved here only six years ago.” You question.

“I work at the FBI and with a genius tech analyst, it was easy.”

“If I didn’t know you, I’d be afraid to be the subject of one of your future cases with what you just told me.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean it to sound creepy.” She adds, embarrassed.

You brush it away with your hand to tell her it’s okay.

“So what are you doing here ? Do you feel better ? Aren’t you supposed to be resting instead of standing here, waiting for me ?”

“I’m better, don’t worry. I can’t work”, she sighs showing you her sling, “but at least, I can move. I wanted to talk to you. Since last time, we didn’t have the opportunity to speak and you didn’t answer my calls.”

“I was busy with work, I’m sorry.”

“I’m in no position to blame you for that.”, Emily assures you before looking deeply into your eyes, “Look, I… I know we broke up for a reason, but you can’t deny that when we saw each other, something happened. For a moment, I almost forgot we hadn’t been together for ten years. Y/N, I know I’m always on the move but at least I’ll always come back here, I don’t have to go undercover. I’ll always be able to come back home, come back to you. I’m not asking for us to get back together right away, we could take it slow, trying to learn each other again, see how our relationship develops but I don’t want to see you leave again.”, she admits, taking your hand with her right arm, “The day we broke up was the worst. Even if it was the best thing to do at the time, I hated every second of it. I never thought I’d have the occasion to see you again and when you walked through the hospital's bedroom's door, I thought I was dreaming. I don’t know if you care about me as much as I do about you, but if it’s the case, I’d like to give us another chance. I still love you Y/N.”

Emily lets go of your hand to stroke your cheek. Your heart misses a heartbeat while you try to regain your composure. When reality hits you, a tender smile makes its way on your face.

“I still love you, too, Emily.”

Without thinking, Emily throws herself in your arms and kisses you with such passion. Your hands get lost in her hair, wanting to press her as close to you as possible. Oh, how you missed her lips ! You wonder how you spent all those years without feeling them against yours. Emily deepens the kiss a bit more until you’re out of breath. You barely break the embrace, your forehead touching. You look at each other full of love, happy to finally be in each other's arms again, after all these years.

Masterlist

{This is my side blog so I'll be answering comments under the username @marie-sworld}

#marie swriting in english #criminal minds x y/n #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds oneshot #criminal minds #emily prentiss x female reader #emily prentiss x you #emily prentiss x y/n #emily prentiss x reader #emily prentiss #emily prentiss x fem reader #emily prentiss x female!reader #emily prentiss x fem!reader

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doodle-pops · 1 year

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Having Nightmares And Elladan Comforting You

Request: Hi! I love your writing so much and was so glad to see you've opened your requests. I was hoping I could please request a fluffy fic or headcanons with Elladan trying to comfort his partner who's having a repeat of the same nightmare each night? I'm such a simp for him and I'm so glad to see him on the list of characters you write for. Thank you :) - @snowsoothsayer

A/N: I was torn between writing this as a fic or a headcanon, so I merged both. All the other attempts at making it a fic turned out too angsty and I didn't want to give you that since you wished for fluff.

·⊰ As a heavy sleeper, it will take a lot to get Elladan to notice your frantic state beside him, whining and fighting around the bed as your dream becomes more graphic and terrifyingly vivid. While you were experiencing a nightmare beyond your wildest comprehension, he was still fast asleep.

·⊰ When morning rolls around and he turns to feel your presence beside him, he will be met with the imprint of your body and a blanket halfway torn off the bed. It was not an uncommon event for him to wake to an empty bed next to him given your job as a healer. You were required to be up and running early.

·⊰ Unbeknownst to Elladan, you were sitting outside on the balcony all night, baring the harshness of the cold to keep you awake. It was not the first time you had faced that nightmare and no matter how much you attempted to take herbal teas to reduce the hallucinations and vividness of the dreams, nothing worked.

·⊰ The entire day, you would appear as a walking zombie with severe dark circles under your eyes, yawning every few seconds and resisting the urge to find sleep. Due to your differences in duties, if he wasn’t up before you, then it was up and it was rare that your paths crossed. Hence, throughout the day, he could not discover your frightened state.

·⊰ When night falls, he would notice the panicked disposition you were currently in and question you on your distressed state. “Why do you look like someone gave you two black eyes? Did someone try to paint you as a raccoon? Is work getting difficult, do you want me to speak with my father?”

·⊰ All his questions melted your heart and made you laugh at his specific ability to fit a bit of humour into the mix. But not wanting to worry him with your nightmare because he had essential duties and couldn’t stay up all night, you would shake it off with a lie of being tired and not getting enough sleep. “Don’t worry, I’ll take a few days off to rest.”

·⊰ Finding your response reasonable, Elladan would not find anything suspicious about it until he does experience a hit to his body during the night. It takes a lot to wake him from his slumber, so it explains that your nightmare was awfully terrifying. Flying from his sleep, ready to strike at the intruder, he is met with your frightened body warding off whosoever.

·⊰ A few shakes and calls of your name would take you out of your nightmare and immediately into Elladan’s arms, trembling. The grip you held onto him was unlike any other and in that instant, he knew not getting enough sleep and being stressed was not the complete answer.

·⊰ Elladan would allow you to hold him as tightly as you wish without complaint for as long as you desired. He needed you to see he was your safe haven, and that the threat was gone. Expect his voice to become soft like petals as he caresses your skin and sends you sweet, reassuring words.

“It’s alright, it’s alright. I’m here now and nothing is going to harm you ever again. I’m here meleth, I am here.”

Elladan’s second act is to lie with you on his chest and rest your ear above his heartbeat, using it as a soothing method to relieve your frantic state. Your entire body was trembling with fear, and it pained him to witness you experiencing this. He’s aware that you’re in no state to speak about what you envisioned.

“There, there, meleth. Everything is alright now. Whatever or whoever it was, I’m here to save you from them,” he cooed into your hair while he littered dozens of soft-petal kisses.

Both arms wrapped around you, one rubbing your back and the other cradling your head to his chest. The faint scent of peppermint and oranges radiating off his body gave your mind an extra sense of security. Your arms tightened around his upper body, though he could bare the constriction of your arms, he was willing to take the pain if it meant removing yours.

“Elladan,” you sniffled, “if I needed saving, would you be there?”

Your question was enough to ring bells in his head about what your nightmare was based on, a fear of yours you once unfortunately experienced. It was how he met you. It wasn’t the first time he learned that you suffered nightmares and dreamt about your incident, but it was new for him to realise that as its one-year anniversary approached, it became stronger.

Nothing wasting a second to give you any sense of false hope, he courageously responded with pride and valour, “I would give my life for yours in a heartbeat.” The hands that rested against your skin constricted around your body and pressed you closer to his chest, removing any ounce of spacing. In response, he felt your body sagging against his as the tension easily dissipated. Part of him felt horrible that he couldn’t remove the accursed dream out of your mind and the other part wished that he had found you before the more horrid things happened.

“Oh, my little meleth. My sweet, sweet, little lovable meleth, don’t you know I’m your knight in shining armour? I’m your saviour! I’m the strongest elf there ever were!” he boasted and joked, though he was quickly put in his place by the last statement.

Giggling at his eccentric remarks, you were appalled when he made the statement of being the strongest. As much as you knew he was lifting your spirits out of the pit, it was enough to make you correct him. “You are far from the strongest Elladan,” you informed, “if it’s anyone, it’s Lord Glorfindel, the Balrog Slayer.”

“Who says I can’t fight a Balrog?” he shouted.

“Me, because you’ll probably get pulled by your hair like Lord Glorfindel did,” you giggled.

Offended by your statement, he jerked his head back dramatically and gasped, “Excuse me! I’m trying to be all heroic here and you’re not letting me. You’re dragging me!”

“Back down to earth to be humbled,” you snorted. Your mood was improving despite the lurking images of your nightmare in the background, Elladan’s sense was humour was enough to fight them off.

“You are the worse supporter ever.”

“And you are the best.”

Masterlist

Taglist: @eunoiaastralwings @noldorinpainter @ranhanabi777 @spidergirla5 @lilmelily @someoneinthestars @mysticmoomin @aconstructofamind @floraroselaughter @the-phantom-of-arda @rain-on-my-umbrella @singleteapot @wandererindreams @asianbutnotjapanese @justellie17 @justjane @silverose365 @bunson-burner

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furiousgoldfish · 1 year

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I wanna talk about specifically the effects abuse had of me during forced labour, because I'm wondering if anyone else is feeling the same, or if anyone has found a way to resolve the symptoms. (tw for forced child labour, abuse during labour, death threats and mentions of injury and violence)

As a kid, I've been forced to work, often in pretty bad conditions, and it would often include further abuse, berating, humiliation, criticism, yelling, I'd even be hit during the work, and I've learned that I have to keep working even if injured or crying, and had to keep those things silent and not complain. I have a specific childhood memory where I had to paint a garage for what felt a whole afternoon and I was crying the entire time, my vision was blurry, and I just thought this was normal, it was nothing out of the ordinary for me. There were also sometimes games played on me where I would be given wrong instructions on purpose, then punished for following them, or would be given zero instructions and a task I've never been taught how to do, only so I could be punished for doing it wrong, and berated for 'not knowing how to do it despite my age'.

I would also often be told that if I don't work, I can't live, and would be threatened to be kicked out and left to die if I don't deserve to be sheltered and fed, so refusing to work was not an option, I would be beaten for it and forced to work injured. It was also why I couldn't walk away from abuse during work, it always felt like a death threat over my head if I refused to do anything, because I would be risking being kicked out and left for dead.

So, the specific after-effects of this are not just severe anxiety during work, but also all of my body functions and sensations completely stop if I'm working. Even if I'm working for hours and hours, I will not experience any hunger, thirst, need to go to the toilet, I won't feel exhaustion, pain, anything. It feels almost like my body is back at the 'death threat' mode and stops everything in order to work, because it's still etched in my brain that if I don't work, I cannot survive, and so our entire survival depends on being fit to work, on stopping all body functions and sensations until the work is done and survival is secured.

And then of course, when I get back home, enter my room, I collapse almost immediately, feeling intense pain in all of my muscles and back, weakness, hunger, dizziness, sometimes tension headache, severe exhaustion. I worry this is because my body was under such severe stress being triggered during work, that it's affected the same as after surviving additional trauma. I had hoped that after a few years of work and nobody hurting me while I'm doing my job, that this would subside, but unfortunately, I'm still having the same symptoms, even working for kind people who offer to me to take a break or bring me something to drink while I'm doing physical work. I don't even notice I'm thirsty until I'm already looking at the drink.

Does anyone else have experience with symptoms like this? And did you manage to resolve some of it, and find a way to work without your body reacting to it as a severe threat to existence?

#child abuse #tw forced child labour #tw mentions of violence #tw death threats #tw child abuse #tw descriptions of abuse during labour #aftermath of abuse #effects of abuse #abusive parents #toxic parents

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otrtbs · 3 months

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Hiii ! I had already asked that question, but I will ask it again because you didn't respond to it last time but at the same time it's harmless (I think), and if you don't respond again then I guess it isn't harmless 😭

I was wondering how you got into art ? Have you ever made art yourself like painting, drawing, and sculpture and decided to study that, or do you really just love art history and never had touched a pen to draw in your life? And how did your family react ?

And another question was were you in school, or work when you were writing AHB (I mean in general when you are writing actually) and if so, how did you find time to write and read? Because as a writer I feel like an important part is to read but when I do write I don't read, and I know that a big part of that is just school and I don't have time, but maybe you got a magic trick or smth?

hi! yeah it is harmless i am just SEVERELY behind on answering asks these days but i am not intentionally ignoring you/anyone. i am just behind on asks, sorry! also i get rambly under the cut so this is a warning!

as far as how i got into art, i used to volunteer at my local art museum when i was in high school!! and during that time i got to talk to a bunch of curators and educators and i was like,,,,, 'yeah. i wanna do this'

i am NOT artistic at all,,, i can't draw or paint to save my life el oh el. i had to take a fine arts course as an undergrad in uni which was fairly rudimentary ,,, just exploring different art mediums,,, color theory,, etc. and i was SO BAD at it,, so. bad. we had to bring in our art projects for critique and i still have nightmares about that...oof.

as far as my family support,,,, also el oh el. uhm,, no one was very thrilled with my life decisions to say the least...but i do not care! it's my life to live! then when my sister went to uni and said she wanted to be a biomedical engineer major n maybe go to med school,, well they put all their attention on her so we move!

also yes!! i was in school while i was writing ahb! i was in my final year of undergrad, i worked full time as a resident assistant at my university and i worked part time at a call center (<- WORST JOB OF MY FUCKING LIFE) and sometimes i would pick up extra shifts at my university's campus store because i was paying my own way through undergrad and so honestly.... the truth is i hardly slept. which is not healthy and i do not recommend that you do that at all. by any means. thankfully, because it was my final year i had some easy "blow off" classes in addition to upper division art history courses so the workload was lighter than previous semesters.

but my RA job would put me "on call" which meant i was the one an entire building of 500+ college girls would call if there was emergency of any kind (could be something serious like a fire or a strange man in the girls dorms or someone needing serious medical attention to something miniscule someone's fire alarm running out of batteries). and we would be on call for 24 hours on the weekends or 5pm to 8 am on weekdays. and if you missed a call because you were asleep you would be fired immediately no questions asked. and bc i got my housing and a lot of my income from that job,,,, i would get so paranoid and stressed abt missing a phone call that i wouldn't sleep at all when i was on call. so i did a lot of my writing for ahb! during those times at like 5am while i was on call. i was also required to work 10-15 hours a week at the front at my university through my RA position and it was a 24 hour desk and i got the night shift where literally nobody would come in. i'd work 10pm-2am on tuesdays and thursdays and then a few hours on saturday (But those were normally busy). and i would write my fanfic then!!! (should've been doing school work ,,, but alas) <- so for the "sHE CoULd'vE aT lEasT EdiTed iT" crowd who have beef with ahb!,,, i was too busy trying to graduate uni and working 3 jobs to do anything but post. so eat dirt.

additionally, i didn't read fanfic when i was writing ahb! for the most part. i was reading a ton before i started writing and then i think i was only able to keep up with the choices updates and picked up heavy fanfic reading again once ahb! was finished.

so no magic tricks from me unfortunately :(( i think it was only feasible bc i was operating on like zero sleep and my course load was light the final semester, and i got lucky with my job hours !! otherwise,, i didn't really do anything else. like i stopped reading, stopped watching shows,, etc,, if i had free time i would be on the google doc hahaha

#asks #and that's my life story good lord

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lokisprettygirl · 2 years

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Sub!Loki who loves to suck on the reader’s tits. If its okay can it have mommy kink

Like not in a sexual way just comforting

Maybe part of the CEO! Reader x Sub!Loki????

You said sub loki, Mommy kink and titties sucking then you asked me to not make it Smutty? I tried my best 😅

Warning : Mommy kink

Read the dom ceo reader/ sub Loki series here

Dom CEO Reader x Sub Loki (Part 6)

You looked at Loki in the board meeting, he was stressed out of his mind. The other members were disappointed with the current financial take that he made recently, which brought a bit of a loss for the company, but that's how it is. Financial decisions are risky and his job was riskier. Once the meeting got over you walked over to him

"Loki stop stressing so much alright? It's business, it happens" you mumbled as softly as you could. There were cameras in the conference room and you didn't want to seem suspicious.

"I screwed it so badly, did you see the way they were looking at me, judging me silently with their eyes" he huffed and you furrowed your brows in response

"It doesn't matter, okay? As I said things go wrong sometimes, you did your best" you picked up your laptop so you could leave for your office, and he did the same, as soon as you got out of the conference room you whispered to him

"See me after everyone is gone, okay? Drink water, and eat your lunch, I don't want you skipping your meals alright?" He gave you a small smile. You are so tough when you're in the boss mode but since you both started your weirdly perfect relationship he is seeing the softer side of you more and more everyday. And He loves it.

"Yess mamm" he gave you a wink as he went to his office. The day went by fairly normal, you did text him in between to ask him if he ate or not, you didn't want to coddle him, he was a grown man, but he was your baby and he was stressed out of his mind, the responsibility was getting to him and you felt worried about him.

Ever since he brought the Mommy play in bed you have been feeling overly protective of him. Nothing too weird, just him calling you Mommy while he was being that way stirred something in you, you wanted to shelter him, protect him and take care of him. You have never felt this way about any other guys in your life.

You looked at the time it was 8 pm, everyone must have left by now, you texted loki and he was on his way to see you. As he came inside you asked him to lock the door.

"How long do you still have to work?" He asked you, he seemed tired and fried from the day, he still managed to look like the hottest and most adorable guy you have ever laid your eyes on. The white shirt he wore under his suit made you want to fuck him right now.

"Just a few minutes, sit down sweet thing" he sat down on the chair in front of your desk, you were working on the laptop and he was just staring at you, everytime your eyes met you'd wink at him and he'd blush so deeply. It felt nice to know that he still got flustered by you. Once you were done you walked over to him, you lifted your pencil skirt up and sat down on his lap, with your legs on either side of his thighs. He quickly pressed his face between your chest, his comfort place as he liked to call it.

"Babyboy you need to relax, you're so stressed" he hummed in response as you scratched his scalp with your fingernails. Then he put his head up to look at you, his eyes were teary and it hurt you

"What's wrong? Talk to me, what can I do?" You asked him softly as you pressed several kisses on his forehead again and again

"Mmmm just need to be close to you..mommy" he whispered in a sad meak voice and it stirred the same feeling in you that you have felt before, the feeling of wanting to burn the whole world down just so you could keep him safe

"Ohh baby, what do you need? tell me..I'll give you everything and anything, you know that right? " He nodded his head and his head pressed up against your breasts again.

"You want to stay there, is it comfy?" You asked him and he hummed in response

"Mmm so comfy, can I uhh..nevermind" he mumbled so you instantly cupped his cheeks and made him look at you.

"You know better than to hide your feelings don't you sugarbear?" His eyes teared up more as he nodded

"I..I want to suck on your titties please..can I?" You bit on your lips as you heard the request, he can do whatever he wants to you and you'd let him.

"Of Course baby, you have done that before, why did you hesitate to ask?" You questioned him and he looked down

"I..it's always been a sexual thing, but today I ..just want to suck and stay there until I'm all lost in your feeling.. now I feel like a weirdo" You took off his tie and then his coat followed, you wanted him to relax.

"First of all, stop, okay? You know I love each and everything about our relationship. And I'd never be weirded out by anything and I don't want you to feel it either, do you understand?" You caressed the nape of his neck and he closed his eyes as the sensation felt so soothing

"Yes Mommy, please, take care of me" he mumbled so you unbuttoned your shirt quickly and pulled it out of your skirt. His mouth latched onto your neck as you took your bra off then you placed his head between your bare breasts, he made the prettiest sound you have ever heard as soon as he felt the warmth of your skin

"Mmmmm you're so warm..I love you so much..I love you" your eyes teared up at the confession, you were in your feels about him, you had gotten it really bad for him. You placed a kiss on the top of his head

"I love you sweet baby, you want to suck? Go on..come on..it's okay" his mouth latched onto your right nipple as soon as he heard you, you didn't want to moan, this wasn't supposed to be sexual but how could you not feel excited by the erotic situation. He looked so soft and innocent like that, you wanted to corrupt him to the core as if you already haven't

He made the humming satisfied noises as he continued to suckle on your nipple softly, your mouth stayed open as you looked down and watched him suck so tenderly, his tongue circled around your areolas, the wet noises his mouth made made you gush.

"Mmm, is this good? you like sucking on mommy's titties sweet baby?" You asked him. And he pressed his head up to kiss you quickly

"I love it..I love it so much, I just want to stay there and keep going" he whispered between the kiss so you cupped his cheeks and pressed his lips onto your left nipple this time. He played with your nipples by holding it between his lips and then he licked it over and over driving you crazy with his suction. He grabbed your boobs in both of his hands and sucked on the top, marking you with his lips,

"That's it..keep going, such a good boy for mommy, you can always use me as a stress buster" he whimpered as he heard you, he loved this so much. He placed his head between both of your breasts as if he was trying to hide himself in there, his arms wrapped around your waist as he just sat there holding you for as long as he wanted to.

"Thank you..thank you..thank you..I love you" he looked up at you so you kissed him again. You grinded on his crotch and he let out the sweetest little moan

"I'll ruin everyone for you my sweet boy, all you have to do is tell me.. Is anyone in particular giving you a hard time because of your position at the company?" He leaned back into the chair, he heard your question but his mind went hazy as he felt your hips rolling.

"No mommy..just stressed from work..you'll ruin everyone for me?" He smiled and grabbed your hips, then he placed soft wet kisses on your neck

"Everything and everyone, I'll do whatever I can to protect you, my baby cub"

"Fuckk..fuck fuck fuck.. take me home please" he whined in utter deseperation, how could you not fight the world for him when he was like this around you?

"Whatever you need"

#loki #loki x female reader #loki x reader #loki x reader fluff #loki x reader insert #loki x reader smut #loki x reader fic #dom reader x sub loki #sub loki #asks requests

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mmkin · 4 months

Text

Forever Clockwork

I know there's been a lot of Arlong simping on my Tumblr lately (and that is continuing!) but in the meantime I interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to bring you some Dr. Wily simping. Arlong x Reader was the first reader fic I wrote, and now I wanna write about another villain getting some love. Link to AO3 as well as the story itself available under the cut. Please enjoy this beautiful Wily picture from @jennoirwolf and some beautiful Gigamix Wily. And yes, the second image is the same picture as referenced in the first chapter of the story.

Forever Clockwork

Dr. Wily x Reader

I used multiple sources of canon for this – the games, comics, anime, TV series, and manga, so you can imagine whatever version you like, though my favorite visual of Wily is from the Mega/Gigamix manga (now that’s a silver fox!)

This story is set after the Stardroids arc (after Megaman 7 video game-wise)

Megaman does not belong to me and is the property of Capcom, Archie Comics, Hitoshi Ariga, other license holders/copyright holders, etc. Feedback is much welcome and appreciated.

o0o0o0o

You were one of Wily's students when you were at university. You considered yourself blessed that your last few years of pursuing your degree placed you under the tutelage of the illustrious Drs. Light and Wily. You were a great admirer of their work and ever since you were a kid, you'd always liked tinkering around with various machines, from helping your grandfather with his car to writing code for various projects.

You'd made your way through high school, winning several respectable scholarships that got you into the prestigious university that, at that time, had both of these famous doctors on their faculty, since the doctors had their lab not far from the school.

Dr. Wily was known to be the tougher of the two, but you still considered yourself lucky to be his student, and you’d learned so much from him. Already, even before the first line of Robot Masters was finished, Wily was known as a bit of a troublemaker, but you liked that.

However, you didn't think he would go so far as to steal a whole line of Robot Masters and let them go on a rampage. And then create his own lines of Robot Masters, and then steal them from others like Cossack. It seemed like Wily had a one-track mind as you watched him from afar while advancing through your career. Sometimes though, you wish he hadn't disappeared like he did. He'd gone rogue not long before you graduated with your master's degree.

You'd tried a few different fields before settling in your current one, but you were feeling increasingly dissatisfied with your work for a company that specialized in private, personalized robots. And as you'd come to see, a big part of that was essentially companion bots. Specs would be customized depending on the type of companionship the client was seeking. Sometimes you rolled your eyes when you went over an order, but a job was a job. As much of what you did involved putting together hardware, you could spend long days – or nights – at the company lab. Then you'd drag yourself home. You've tried having a social life, but you have a pretty low social battery.

You plopped down on your armchair after a particularly stressful week. Perhaps it was time to consider a job change. You already had a solid resume, so you were confident you could find a job elsewhere Stretching out your arms, you see a shadow move, and give out a yelp, thinking you’ve surprised a burglar.

It reveals itself to be a robot – no, a Robot Master. Given that you study the Robot Masters others make, you quickly recognize a Wily number – DWN-024. Shadow Man. You stare at him as he inclines his head in a bow, the shuriken on his forehead flashing for a brief moment as it reflected your lamp.

“Doctor Y/n Lastname?" he asks. You're certain he knows perfectly well who you are, but this is a gesture of politeness. Already you find this robot charming. You nod in affirmation, your interest piqued. "I have been sent by Dr. Wily to offer you a job."

Holy fuck. You’d been seriously considering a job change, and one just fell in your lap! And from Dr. Albert Wily, of all people! You didn’t admit it to others, but you continued to follow his career even after he went rogue. And you most certainly didn’t admit that you had a crush on him back then, and still did. He had that silver fox appeal, after all. You stare blankly for a few seconds.

“Are you all right?” you hear the robot ask, and you turn your focus back to him.

“Yeah, yeah. It's just… I mean, I didn't expect to come home to this, you know? I'm not trying to be rude, you just caught me off-guard…!" You let out a nervous laugh. You take a deep breath, collecting yourself. So Dr. Wily wants you to come to work for him. It wouldn't be the first time he's worked with other people, although that didn't always work out for the best. So there's a lot to think about. You haven't built your own Robot Masters like Dr. Cossack or others did, so you have no robots to steal.

You look at the robot. He is a sophisticated piece of work, and your experience tells you that if you were to open him up, you’d likely find a design more sophisticated than whatever your current employer could offer.

“Do you need more information?" Shadow Man asked. You shrugged and nodded, and he rattled off a few things such as labs and equipment, amenities, and such. It actually sounded pretty nice, and certainly didn't sound like an offer that would be made to someone Wily intended to kidnap. You stroke your chin… are you seriously fucking contemplating joining forces with a mad scientist who keeps trying to take over the world?

“How is he?” you ask the robot. It dawned upon you that Dr. Wily must be listening to this conversation. The robot is silent for a moment, almost as if he’s listening for something.

Aha. Wily old bastard.

“You may see for yourself in person. If you accept, of course.”

You're tempted to call out your old mentor. But you smile and shrug. "Well, I would like to see how my old teacher is doing," you say, offering no commitment to the mil ob proposal. You offer Shadow Man a smile, fairly certain that he's video-recording you too. The smile isn't fake, though. You're secretly thrilled at the idea of seeing him again.

The robot offers his hand, and you take it, wondering how much of a gamble you’ve just endeavored on. Fortune favors the bold… at least, you hope.

You blink as you enter a well-appointed lab, and for a moment panic as you wonder if you should have put on some fresh clothes, the robot did sort of ambush you when you'd just gotten home from work… Just as you think to run your finger through your hair to try to look a bit nicer, your heart skips a beat as you see your old mentor.

He looked a few years older, but he was still as much of a silver fox as ever, a handsome sight in his dark clothing that was contrasted by his white lab coat and skeleton-themed tie. He approaches you, arms spread out in a gesture of welcome, like a host receiving a guest. It almost looks like he’s offering a hug. You wish…

“Welcome to my humble abode, Y/n,” he says. “Or would you prefer Dr. Lastname now?” he adds with a small smirk before he offers his hand for you to shake. You take it quickly, feeling the wiry strength in his grip.

“I’m fine with Y/n, though considering this is a job offer perhaps I should go by my professional name…” you shrug. “I can't believe I'm here. After you disappeared…" You shake your head. "I didn't think I would see you again. And believe it or not, I was a little disappointed at that thought."

You try to not blush, hoping he doesn’t read too much in your slip.

“You missed me?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

Oh, crap. He read you like an open book. Play it cool, play it cool. You shrug and offer a small smile. “What can I say, you were my favorite teacher.”

He grins at that, and you feel your heart fluttering as if you were a silly little schoolgirl. Why the hell does this man have that effect on you? And despite the questionable morality of many of his actions, you do admire his moxie. He’s a stubborn old bastard, and you have to admit his plans for world domination suit him better than the standard mid-life crisis.

None of this means you’re not nervous around him. If you’d not wanted to come here, would he have kidnapped you?

That wouldn't be so bad if he treated you like a princess or something, right? Hah. Damn, you still do have that crush, huh?

“I know a lot of the students thought I was a bastard, so that’s refreshing to hear.”

“I don't know, many of the times you tore into someone, they deserved it, and it was entertaining to watch." Schadenfreude and all that. He laughs at that, and leads you down the building, passing a few robots at work and the like. The space has a lot of the things you'd imagine Wily to have, and you're not disappointed in the setup. It could be a lot of fun to work here… if you're willing to put yourself on the Most Wanted list.

Wily’s POV

It was nice seeing Y/n again. Y/n had been his favorite student and he had considered recruiting Y/n when he’d gone rogue back then. But she was so young and full of potential. He knew he was going on a risky path, and hadn’t wanted to drag her down with him. Oh, it was bloody tempting, though!

But now, she was old and experienced enough, and it seemed that one of his predictions about her had proven correct. She was bright and might not be satisfied in the usual industries that called for expertise in robotics, regardless of how well the job paid. If he was wrong and she eventually found something that made her happy, then good for her. But over the last decade, she'd bounced through several high-paying jobs. And well, he would be lying if he said he didn't find her attractive. She'd been pretty cute, in a nerdy chick way back then, and she still rocked the vibe pretty well. She trailed behind him, glancing over his projects and experiments with a knowing scientist's eye and curiosity.

“Oh hey, that’s neat that you have that picture,” she said as she gestured to a picture on the wall. Granted, it was a copy, but it was one of his favorite pictures, and added a nice touch to his workspace. She gave his tools a respectful berth as she approached the desk, looking at it. A young Dr. Light and Dr. Wily were standing with their first AI project, their arms crossed and up in the air in a symbol of triumph.

“It’s a pretty great picture, isn’t it?” he asked.

“Hell yeah.”

He laughed at that and continued along. He was not stupid enough to think there wasn't a possibility of her coming here just so she could try to steal something. She kept switching jobs, didn't she? Though he had to admit, if she turned out to be a thief, he'd be disappointed. No one was perfect, but surely she respected him too much to do that to him, right?

It was nice listening to her as she asked a question about this or that, and the way she asked seemed genuine, instead of someone digging around for information.

o0o0o0o

The picture you just commented on is a pretty famous one. It’s iconic in the robotics community given the work that Drs. Light and Wily did for science. Both of them were quite good-looking, but you think Albert has aged better than his old friend. And well, maybe that picture is what you use as the screen on your smartphone?

Are you going to change that before Wily notices? You're about to ask a question before Shadow Man approaches the two of you with tea. It honestly smelled pretty great, and you took the cup that was offered to you. The green tea is slightly bitter but has an edge of sweetness that balances it out nicely, making for a harmonious flavor.

“Oh, this is good,” you murmur as you finish it off. “Best cup I’ve had in a while, I think. You made this?” you ask the robot. He bows his head, and you smile. “My compliments to the chef.”

It seems like he’s genuinely happy at your compliment. He is an elegant robot, and maybe it’s because you’ve been more sympathetic to Wily than most – well, actually, pretty much anyone else – but you wonder about what he said in the past about robots having souls.

“So, how about it?" he asks as Shadow Man pours you another cup. You look down at the clear green liquid in your cup. You are well aware of his track record. He's more than just a man who marches to the beat of his drum. There's a chance this might not end well. But at the same time, he reached out to you. He has a bit more esteem for you than you had originally thought. You look up at him, taking in his lanky form.

Damn, but he really is a silver fox, isn’t he? Legal repercussions be damned – you tried to play it straight and narrow since you got your degree and look where that got you.

“What the hell. I’m in.”

His delighted laugh rings in your ears. And he does sound pleased as punch about it, as if you just made his day.

#writing #strawberrycatbeans #mega man #dr. wily #wily #x reader #dr. wily x reader #wily x reader #megaman #villain gets the girl #fanfiction #rockman

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