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earlgraytay · 3 years

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how to rec original fiction (when most of what you read is fanfic)

By popular demand!

I've seen a lot of people on here complaining about how Queer Book Rec posts aren't really useful. There's a lot of rec posts that say things like "m/m, found family, magical island setting" without saying anything about the characters, plot, tone, or themes.A lot of the discourse has kinda wound up as FANFIC BAD vs. FANFIC GOOD, but I don't think that fanfic is the problem. A lot of fic rec lists use a format that works for fanfic, but doesn't translate well to original fic.

Like I said here, when you're talking about fic, the ship does a lot of heavy lifting. A ship carries a character dynamic, themes, and tone with it. You know a Stucky fic is likely to be about nostalgia and fixing a relationship broken by circumstance. If you're reccing fanfic, you can say "it's a Stucky coffeeshop AU" and people will have an idea of the vibe. But when you're talking about original fic, you can't really do that. "F/F" and "M/M" are poor substitutes for shipnames; they don't get across the same information about tone and theme.

So how can you rec a piece of original fic you liked while getting across the same information? Gentle reader, I'm so glad you asked.

I'm gonna use my short story The Captain's Sphere as an example. If I were going to describe The Captain's Sphere the way I've seen some Tumblr rec lists do it, I'd say something like this:

Steampunk fantasy f/f with a disabled trans lady scientist main

This isn't the worst description of The Captain's Sphere you could write, but it leaves out a lot of the things that make Sphere unique and interesting. So how do we make this work?

First: The hook.

The hook is the one-to-three sentence description on the Amazon page. You don't have to copy it verbatim- tbh you probably shouldn't- but it's what the author thinks makes the book unique.

Here's the hook for The Captain's Sphere:

Lady Ava Loftus is an unusual woman, even by the standards of sky-sailors. As she pursues her passion- the study and dissection of mysterious creatures called angels- she must move between different social spheres and contend with others' ideas of who and what she should be. Can she adhere to the expectations set for a lady of quality without betraying her true self?

If you can find a way to sum up this hook in your own words, that already goes a long way towards making your rec more interesting. It'll get across more of what the book's about.

So you might say something like:

The Captain's Sphere's about a trans steampunk sky captain who hunts eldritch angels, does SCIENCE, and deals with Victorian gender roles.

Second: the tone.

This is something you really need to get across in a rec, and it's hard to do. but it's really important for convincing people to read it. after all, any genre can mean a lot of different things. does fantasy mean The Secret of Platform 13 or A Song of Ice and Fire? does steampunk mean pith helmets and colonialism or critique of the Industrial Revolution?

One way to get this across is just... to mention something you really liked about the setting, or the character interactions, or the plot. So for example, you could say:

I really liked how Ava has to act like a different person in each part of her life- stern ship captain, family black sheep, distinguished scientist, or loving girlfriend. I also liked the 'angels'- they're eldritch and mindbending without being too Lovecraftian.

Finally- you can cheat.

if it's easier for you to describe things in terms of ships, tropes, and fics, you can still do that for original fic. If the main pairing in a book reminds you of a pairing you like from a piece of popular media, you can compare them to that pairing. If the main plot of a book reminds you of a fic that's popular in your favourite fandom, you can compare it to that fic. Don't make it the entire rec- you risk falling into the "F/F Steampunk Lebsian" description again- but if it's the way you can best express yourself then go for it, you funky lil nerd.

For the Captain's Sphere, you could say something like:

The main characters' relationship really reminded me of Jenny and Madame Vastra from Doctor Who- the difference in their social status and their desire to protect each other means that they love each other, but don't always trust each other. It's a really cool dynamic and I wish I could see more of it.

So when you put all this together, you've got a much longer description. But put the two side by side, and...

Steampunk fantasy f/f with a disabled trans lady scientist main

Versus...

The Captain's Sphere's about a trans steampunk sky captain who hunts eldritch angels, does SCIENCE, and deals with Victorian gender roles. I really liked how Ava has to act like a different person in each part of her life- stern ship captain, family black sheep, distinguished scientist, or loving girlfriend. I also loved the 'angels'- they're eldritch and mindbending without being too Lovecraftian. The main characters' relationship really reminded me of Jenny and Madame Vastra from Doctor Who- the difference in their social status and their desire to protect each other means that they love each other, but don't always trust each other. It's a really cool dynamic and I wish I could see more of it.

One of these descriptions doesn't tell you anything about the story other than "there's gays and trans". The other one's much longer, but it also gives you a good idea of what you're getting into. If I was looking for queer fic to pick up, I'd be mildly intrigued by the first description- but I'd know I had to read the second one.

You see the difference?

#fandom #fanfic #fic recs #on writing #on litcrit #diverse representation #ownvoices #how to rec origfic

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rainywritingsx · 4 years

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hcs: Shinsou, Todoroki & Midoriya with an s/o who gets drunk on apple juice

Hey, this may sound kind of stupid but when I drink apple juice it has the same effect as if I drank alcohol. So can I request hcs for Shinsou, Shouto, & Izuku with an s/o that gets “drunk” by just drinking apple juice, she gets all slow, calls a thing something else, and is overall just wasted, like I don’t remember what I do when I drink apple juice and that’s why I can’t trust it, thank if you do my weird request!

no no it doesn’t sound stupid at all, if anything it seems quite amusing to me lmao, which is why I can’t wait to write this :D hope you enjoy!

I haven’t written in a whiiiilleeee woah, this feels strange but I also missed it so much. I’m gonna try to be as I am usual with writing, I think I just need to get into it again ^^ Anyway enough of my talking about me, now onto the headcanooonssss

Tip jar ^^

Hitoshi Shinsou

okay so

it would take a while for Shinsou to see you in your ‘drunk’ state

because I don’t think he really hangs out with people a lot

and when you two do you just avoid apple juice like the plague because you know exactly what happens if you don’t

but well, one day you’re hanging out the bakusquad who you’re friends with

and of course you knew Shinsou wasn’t there so you went all out with the juice

you aren’t that embarrassed about being that way around your friends as they’re strange too and they had seen you that way before

but

they know that you kindaaaaa like the purple haired boi

and kaminari and sero think that it would be hilaaarious to have him see you like this

so they text him to come to kaminari’s dorm room, where you all are hanging out

Shinsou at first declines the offer bc he just wants to sleep and isn’t in the mood to be annoyed

but then kaminari tells him you’re there too ;)

he leaves out the drunk on juice part :)

He won’t give in immediately, just because he knows he will get teased if he does

so well, he goes to the dorm of class A (Aizawa totally didn’t see him and pretend he wasn’t looking at all) and looks for kaminari’s room

he gets there and is slightly disappointed when bakugou opens the door instead of you

he doesn’t ask where you are, but bakugou knows that shinsou wants to see you

and tbh, he wants to see his reaction to your state too

“she’s inside” is all he says

Shinsou kinda wants to r u n

But he doesn’t

As he enters he can hear yelling from the distance

and there’s just pure confusion on Shinsou’s face

until he enters the living room

he sees you dancing on the couch, yelling some incoherent sentences

mina has joined you at this point and the sight is just really funny

assuming you got drunk on alcohol (y’all are of legal age here we don’t support underage drinking!!) he just chuckles and shakes his head

and then sero decides to tell him you became… that… because of apple juice

to say that Shinsou finds it amusing is an understatement

You’re probably too drunk to even realise what is going on

People who don’t know him maybe won’t be able to tell, but the bakusquad sees he’s enjoying every second of this

“Oh my god look at that cute kitty!!!”

“....y/n that’s a plushie of a bear”

okay now over to when you two are together

Shinsou won’t be controlling about this or anything, since it’s not like you are ruining your kidneys and as long as you aren’t alone things are fine

might tease you the next day over it tho hehe

(after he has taken care of you and you’ve recovered from your ‘hangover’ of course :D)

also imagine him carrying to your dorm :,)

i mean he b u f f e d up didn't he

literally doesn't care if you’re heavy or not he WILL carry you bc you’re his baby!!

might act like he gets annoyed at your drunk state

which he will be sometimes but he wouldn’t trade it for the world

Todoroki Shouto

Todoroki’s reaction is hard to tell from his face probably

I mean he doesn’t make you think he’s annoyed or angry

but he isn’t laughing either

baby is just confused

and before you two are couple he doesn’t exactly know how to take care of you in that state

like he wants to help but,,,, how????

sometimes

he will slightly chuckle at you

and have this teeny tiny adorable smile uwu

“wait what is a canadian flag doing here.”

“..... you mean todoroki?”

okay in order for him to see you like that you will probably have to hang out with the dekusquad

they don’t really drink alcohol, so most drinks that they have are just juice

they know what happens when you drink too much

iida will most likely constantly be telling you off if you drink too much

and uraraka just tries to distract you so you won’t be drinking the whole time

….and midoriya doesn’t really know what to do

anyway, one time, midoriya, being the sweet angel he is, invites todoroki to join you guys

and well he wants to say no first

but then deku rambles and somewhere he mentions you

boy is sold immediately

and by the time he arrives, you are already wasted

and oh lord what a mess

todoroki doesn’t really know how to react

don’t get him wrong, he won’t think of you any less

he just,,, doesn’t know how to help?

“todoroOooooOOokiii, hiiii~” you giggle as you skip over to him

he can’t help but think you’re adorable uwu

baby is blushing

before he realises your attention goes back to the music that you had put on earlier

“SAVAGE LOOOVEEE, DID SOMEBODY DID SOMEBODY BREAK YOUR HEAAART.”

you even try to make him join

haha, no.

but of course he will watch

and secretly enjoy after a while

does feel this unfamiliar pang when he sees you pulling Midoriya with you to dance

dw bub he likes someone else :)

okay and

when you two are together

todoroki tries to keep you as sober as he can

he always sees the regret in your face the day after and he doesn’t like seeing his partner sad :(

todoroki is too pure for this world i’m crying

might not always be the best at comfort the day after but you can tell he does his best

if you ask him to get ice cream he will buy a supply for the next 59 years

it’s the thought that counts right

and of course it will be bought with Endeavor’s credit card :D

Midoriya Izuku

okay so

I think how midoriya handles it can go two ways, depending on whether you two are close or not

if you two are close or have been childhood friends, he will know about your… interesting habit

however, if he doesn’t know you that well he probably has no idea

tho he does analyse people at times, I don’t think the fact that you get drunk on apple juice crosses his mind

if you two are close, he will try his best to keep you ‘sober’

if you do happen to get drunk he will keep a veeeery close eye on you!!

and as soon as a) someone bothers you or b) you’re just completely wasted he will take action

and bring you to your room if it gets too late

“Izuku…. Why is there broccoli on your head?...”

“uhm… That’s my hair y/n…”

he will 100% blush at some things you say

be careful, his poor heart is v fragile

despite his flustered state he will do his best to help

will definitely take care of you the next day

and trust me, if you thank him or tell him he’s doing great this boi will be so happy and blushy uwu

Now, if he isn’t that close to you it will take a while for him to find out about your interesting habit

he might be a little too shy to help, but he might tell your friends if something is wrong

something like “Hey, is y/n alright?”

just so your friends will stay kinda alert

but well, if they’re wasted too he will most likely try to help

he will be a lot more flustered than if you two were close friends

and he won’t know what exactly to do because he doesn’t know your boundaries, at the same time he wants to respect them so,,,, yeah that will be hard for him

now,,, if you two were a couple

be prepared to get pampered

BUT first of all

he will do his best to make sure you don’t get drunk every time you’re given some apple juice

of course he won’t be controlling

he will just kinda remind you how you get when you drink too much

and if you end up getting ‘drunk’, he will keep a v e r y close eye on you

might even be a little overprotective

will definitely leave the party early with you because he knows how you will be the next day

sorry bub it’s for your own good

the next day he will bring whatever you need!!

“uhm… I know what your favourite ice cream flavor is but there were so many brands so i bought them all.”

welp he means well :D

and cuddles!!!

if you need them he will be more than happy to give them

and soft forehead kisses

aaaa i’m so soft

oh one more thing

he will definitely carry you when you’re too drunk

and

if you snuggle up to his chest and/or wrap your arms around his neck

he will be about to explode

“..why is there a pillow on your chest izu?”

poor boy doesn’t know what to do

and whether you are close or not he will check on you the next day

to sum it up he’s just a shy angel that does his best to help you, whether you barely know each other or are in a relationship

#bnha x reader #midoriya x reader #shinsou x reader #todoroki x reader #bnha headcanon #midoriya headcanons #shinsou headcanons #todoroki headcanons #midoriya izuku x reader #hitoshi shinso x reader #todoroki shouto x reader #bnha headcanons #bnha x you #bnha #mha x reader #mha

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lightsinthedistancee · 3 years

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Fragmented Memories: Poe Dameron x Reader

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader

Word Count: 1.3k

Summary: “He’d put up with the screaming, the crying, the depressive attitudes. He’d tolerated your initial hostility, the way you flinched when he touched you. He took care of you, made sure you ate, got you to sleep. Your love had stuck by you through all of it.”

Poe sticks by Reader through a traumatic event in her life.

Warnings: Implications of Past Sexual Assault, Smut, Profanity

If you wished to be tagged on future works, just leave a comment/reply below or do the form on my masterlist for specific preferences.

A/N (PLEASE READ): Hey guys, I don’t know exactly why I was compelled to write this piece, but I did my research. Tbh, I was hesitant on posting this due to the sensitivity of the subject. Belittling, devaluing, or misrepresenting the experience/struggle of a sexual assault survivor is something I absolutely do not want to do. I am fortunate enough to not have experienced any sexual assault/harassment in my life, meaning I don’t know this experience first hand. If you have any knowledge or find any inaccuracies, feel free to let me know in a comment, and I will fix it. If anyone finds this offensive or as a gross misrepresentation, I will take it down out of respect for that person without hesitation. Enjoy!

..::::.. ..::::.. ..::::.. ..::::..

You laid on top of him, your pilot, your love. Sometimes hovering, sometimes resting your whole weight on his form. The air was warm, firm, like a sheet of protectiveness conforming to you. His breath was hot on your skin as he let out soft, unashamed whimpers occasionally.

You peppered soft kisses along his neck and jaw, savoring the feeling of his hands roaming your body, caressing you, feeling you. His touch was gentle, like smooth silk and velvet on your nerves.

He moaned as you ground down on him, feeling his hardness that complemented the desire you felt. You hadn’t felt that desire in a long time—for a particular reason.

This was your first time.

But no, not like that. Not in the sense of what ‘first time’ generally meant.

This was the first time the two of you had made love upon your return from the captivity of the First Order. Your first time after you’d been violated, defiled, made to feel worthless. Like nothing. After having your body used without your permission.

You’d returned a shell of yourself, doing your job for the Resistance with a ruthless, cutthroat efficiency, for you’d blocked everything else in your head out. Locked it all up. But the damming of all your emotions had its side effects.

Poe had put up with the screaming, the crying, the depressive attitudes. He’d tolerated your initial hostility, the way you flinched when he touched you. He took care of you, made sure you ate, got you to sleep. Your love had stuck by you through all of it.

You’d treated him like dirt at first, like something you wanted to get rid of, but simply couldn’t shake. The memory still triggered a guilt in you over a year later. Still, he’d stayed, had held strong as the stability and anchor in your life.

Sex had been unfathomable for the first year, and he’d respected that. He never pushed you, and he never urged you to do things you didn’t want to. Before your capture, your time spent between sheets with him had been passionate, caring, all fiery desire.

And then, it’d faded to nothing upon your return.

Recovery started small at first. A few weeks for you to let him kiss you. A month to let him hug you. Four months for you to let him see you naked again. Six to let him sleep in the same bed as you. Thirteen to let him go down on you again.

And all that led to here, where you were pressed against him, fingers intertwined as his fingers worked their magic between your legs, coaxing out your wetness.

“Alright, baby girl?” he murmured, checking in on you.

You nodded. The two of you had talked of this for weeks before the present moment. What was off limits, what made you uncomfortable, what was absolutely forbidden. “Very alright.”

When you started to moan and move your hips back against his hand, he sat up, pulling you close to his chest. “Ready?” His soft brown eyes searched yours, looking for any signs of discomfort or uncertainty. His concern made you adore him all the more.

You nodded in response to his query, the pleasure at your core begging to be acted upon. He made you feel safe. He always did.

“If you need me to stop, just say something. You need to talk to me.”

“I know.” You said it with a resolute conviction, trusting him in every way. Despite your trauma, a part of your brain still recognized him as the man who had saved your life countless times, who had consoled you in your darkest moments, who had loved you when you felt unlovable.

And with your readiness, you slowly sank down onto him. The feeling was overwhelmingly familiar, in both a good and bad way. It reminded you of passionate nights nearly a year and a half ago. It also reminded you of cold prison cells that came with an impending dread of some guard of officer walking in to have their way with you.

You didn’t realize that you’d zoned out. You came back to reality at the sound of him saying your name. His hands were on your cheeks, gently grasping your face. “Do we need to stop?” he asked, his eyes worried.

You shook your head, both in response and as a way to rid yourself of the dark memories. “No. I’m fine.”

He frowned. “Are you sure?”

You nodded, offering up a small smile and rolling your hips slightly to prove your point. He gasped, gripping your hips, his face buried in your neck.

He let you determine the pace, giving you the control, letting you do things on your own terms. You were moaning, letting out soft whines every time your clit brushed his pelvis. Only when your hands began to claw at his back did he begin to experimentally thrust back, gauging your reactions. All you did was moan louder.

Soft mutters of your name escaped his lips as he breathed shakily. He hadn’t been with anyone else. He would never cheat on you. Needless to say, it’d been a long time since he’d been inside someone, and he wasn’t going to last long.

But you were closer. He’d already had you fairly close to your finish before he’d slid inside you, and each touch to your clit was bringing you nearer and nearer until you were gasping his name. “Fuck, Poe…I’m gonna….” You were unable to finish your sentence before you were going rigid, riding out the waves of your pleasure as he groaned at the feel of your walls clenching around him.

That was the last straw for him, and with one more thrust, he came, his hands knotted in your hair.

You breathed hard as you laid limp on his chest, still feeling the dull throb between your legs. He shifted, lying down and taking you with him, holding you close to him. It reminded you of how desperately you’d missed this: to feel close to someone after sharing such an intimate act.

But as the dopamine and oxytocin wore off, a feeling of horror and something slightly worse began to set in. Fragmented memories flashed through your mind, disconnected, incomplete, yet still enough to set you off.

And then, you were crying. Soft, silent tears, so small and undetectable and helpless that Poe did not even notice them till he felt the liquid on his chest.

You knew that he was, above all, panicked, due to his body language. He said your name like a question, a plea for you to assure him that he was not the reason for you tears.

He was, but only indirectly. At the core of the situation, was you. You and your trauma that made you despise yourself every day for not being able to get over. That you beat yourself up for. You knew that it was a normal reaction, that there was nothing wrong with it, but a part of you would always sum it up as your weakness.

Poe was talking to you, but you barely heard any of it. Only hid behind the veil of your tears.

“Sweetheart,” he murmured. His hold around you now seemed hesitant, unsure of his actions. You rolled out of his arms, settling on the other side of the mattress curled in a ball. The skin-on-skin contact, all of a sudden, felt less like a comfort and more like a threat. “Baby….”

You didn’t respond, once again locking him out.

There was a feeling coming over you, one you were all too familiar with, a feeling of isolation and desperation. It was a feeling that nothing else existed: that it was just you, your trauma, and your pain. Dear old abusers that would seemingly be with you till the very end.

..::::.. ..::::.. ..::::.. ..::::..

““Fragmented Memories” originally posted on AO3 on 12/24/20.

Taglist: @synical-paradox @dark-academics-and-florals

#poe dameron #poe dameron x reader #star wars #poe dameron fanfiction #Star Wars fanfiction #tfa #tlj #tros

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makeste · 4 years

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BnHA Chapter 270: Harry Potter Rules

Previously on BnHA: Present Mic punched Ujiko in the face! It was awesome. I’m thinking about getting a tattoo of it. Meanwhile Endeavor saved Mirko’s life by setting her on fire (reason #15 why I will never become a superhero), and Aizawa did some sexy Spider-Man poses for our viewing pleasure while fighting the rest of these Noumus which are still annoyingly refusing to die. Anyway but back to Present Mic, the undisputed MVP of this chapter. Because you see, in addition to the punching, he also used his Loud Voice attack (literally the actual attack name; Horikoshi will steal all of my jokes and leave me with nothing) to smash open Tomura’s Noumutank! Which I really thought was going to immediately lead to Everyone Dying, but apparently I was wrong! Anyways so yeah, right now Tomura’s just lying down all heart-stopped and not-breathing. Which seems very anticlimactic, BUT I JUST HAVE THE CRAZIEST FEELING that maybe, just maybe, the super powerful villain lad who just spent the last three arcs slowly upgrading his bad self just in time to wage war on the world as the story reaches its climax, might not actually be dead though.

Today on BnHA: DON’T MIND THAT OMINOUS ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND, IT’S NOTHING, IGNORE IT. Ahem. So first of all, as some of the bolder among us dared to speculate, Tomura is not, in fact, dead. He’s still very much kicking it with his nipple-less pecs and truffula tree hair, putzing around in his mental landscape filled with crumbled buildings and disembodied Theatrical Gesture Hands. For some reason he doesn’t have shoes or a shirt in his mental landscape, which was a very interesting choice on Horikoshi’s part, but we will speak no more of it. Anyway so to sum things up, Tomura’s family is all “TENKO WE LOVE YOU” and he’s all “oh hey” and then AFO fucking appears and he’s all “COME HERE MY BOY” which is exactly as creepy as you would expect, and for some fucking reason TOMURA ACTUALLY DOES COME HERE. And lol it turns out Ujiko gave him AFO. Like the quirk. Yes, that quirk. So long story short, Tomura is about to be possessed by AFO’s evil soul or some shit, and to put the cherry on top, fucking Deku out of fucking nowhere, MILES AWAY, is all “HE’S COMING.” Because of course he can sense it, because AFOFA IS REAL, AND FUCK ME THIS IS ALL HAPPENING TOO FAST, FUCK.

I know this chapter has been out since like 1pm, but I’m not getting to read it until 5 hours later because for once in my life I was trying to be responsible and actually get some work done on a Friday. I thought this might lead to less oh-god-I-still-have-to-get-that-done anxiety hovering over my weekend, but instead it just led to oh-god-I-have-to-get-the-chapter-recap-done anxiety hovering over my now! anyways so this might be a bit rushed lol

(ETA: yeah turns out this wasn’t exactly the kind of chapter you could just read quickly and get on with your life lmao. so, then!)

what a nice panel of Present Mic taking out the trash

you heard ‘em fellas. the doctor is secured. good job everyone we did it, manga over, congratulations. now to cut away to a two-page spread of Dark Shadow comically smothering Dabi’s flames with a giant stock pot lid, and that’ll be that! what a wonderful, extremely short and strangely underwhelming arc in which we haven’t even seen the actual main characters do anything yet. but I guess we don’t need them since the main bad guy is lying dead on the floor! everything is just so fucking dead and secured!! do you think if I keep repeating it enough Horikoshi will finally be like “okay geez I get it” and reveal his hand already

Mic is now ordering Ujiko to power down the Noumu, which again, I’m sure he will definitely do without a fuss since after all the good guys have clearly won the day

OH SHIT OH FUCK

rip X-Less. gonna just take a moment here to imprint your beautiful face onto my memory before it turns into a pile of ash. your face, I mean. not my memory. well my memory more or less already is a pile of ash but that’s neither here nor there ANYWAYS

:’)

what are these little sound effects. I think that’s supposed to be a buzzing noise?? anyways whatever it is PLEASE STOP IT, I AM NOT HAVING A NICE TIME SO STOP

ffff Horikoshi sure has done an excellent job of setting the mood in such a way that all of these panels of X-Less doing incredibly mild things are sending my stress levels through the roof. like is anyone else reading his lines more or less like “WELP, TIME FOR ME TO DIE, ANY SECOND NOW, WE’RE REALLY DOING THIS, THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING, HERE IT COMES”

(ETA: when is this poor sweet innocent man going to fucking die already.)

LET’S CUT BACK TO MIC ESCAPING THE IMMEDIATE VICINITY

I have the clearest mental image of Horikoshi standing by with a walkie talkie in one hand and one of those remote bomb detonation clicky switch thingies in the other, patiently waiting to receive the go-ahead once all of the important characters have gotten to safety

anyway so now Ujiko is talking again

no fear everyone this is just the beginning of his verbal noumu deactivation sequence. nothing to worry about. everything is fine

yes for some reason his code phrase to put all the noumus back to sleep involves going into rambling detail about his work researching quirk singularities and shit. it’s fine. it’s not a big deal. code phrases are just like that sometimes all right

just ignore the increasingly panicked look in Mic’s eye as he slowly realizes he was way too fucking keen to just leave the “dead” Tomura back there with his laser-eyed hero buddy. anyway so let’s continue learning all about the Quirk Illuminati or whatever the fuck

okay so... he faked his own death? 70 years ago, at age 50 or thereabouts? I mean, that’s interesting and all I guess. not saying I wouldn’t be thrilled to spend the rest of this chapter learning all about Ujiko’s boring evil life. I don’t need to say it because it’s implied on account of Ujiko sucks and is the worst. so yeah can we get a move on though

oh shit?!?

WHOSE NARRATION IS THAT IN THE BOXES TOMURA IS THAT YOU OH GOD OH GOD

also, comparing AFO’s smile to a buddha’s really sent an actual shudder of disgust down my spine for some reason lmao. I personally would have steered that comparison in a different area, maybe less to buddhas and more to Norman Bates from Psycho, but to each their own

oh shit wait up

okay but this is actually a pretty big revelation though, isn’t it? because it’s been hinted for a while now that AFO and Ujiko had some method of duplicating quirks (the fact that all the Noumu share the same regeneration quirk was the biggest clue, but there was also John-chan’s quirk, as well as Hood’s Muscular-esque quirk), but as far as I can recall, this is the first time we’ve had it confirmed. though to be fair I wasn’t joking when I said my memory really has been shit lately sob

anyway so for real though, can you really call it a BnHA chapter if you’re not spending a good chunk of it being hopelessly confused over the ownership of some ambiguous thought bubbles. WHO IS THIS. I do seriously feel like it’s Tomura, because he’s the wrathful one, but another hallmark of a typical BnHA chapter is me constantly questioning everything I know as I muddle my way through

(ETA: yeah I’m pretty sure it was him. still impressive how vague it is though! it could also potentially be Ujiko, Mic, or even Deku. hopefully Caleb’s translation on Sunday can shed some more light on this. though he wasn’t really helpful last time this happened lol.)

SOMEBODY PLEASE TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

didn’t... you just... say that “preservation” was your quirk?? what do you mean that you wanted it?? CAN YOU JUST FINISH YOUR SENTENCES LIKE A NORMAL PERSON

anyway so here’s a summary of this chapter thus far

present mic: okay goodbye forever x-less

x-less: what a strange thing to say! :) also is it just me or is this machine fucking staring at me

present mic: turn the noumu off please

ujiko: seventy years ago... society... singularity... he’d be 120 years old now...

??: [REPULSIVE FEELING EW WHO’S TOUCHING ME]

ujiko: all for one has the smile of an angel...

??: [SON OF A BITCH I’M SO FUCKING WRATHFUL]

ujiko: my quirk... preservation... the truth is... my quirk... preservation... the truth is... my quirk...

all caught up?? grand. also btw is anyone else super disturbed by the fact that Ujiko recognizes Mic as being “Kurogiri’s friend”, like holy shit though? how would he know that. I can’t think of any implications of this that aren’t super disturbing tbh

anyways back to -- LOL WHAT THE

Horikoshi Kouhei: [furiously scribbling notes to himself at 3am] BUT WHAT IF THE FOLDING CITY FROM “INCEPTION” HAD MORE GIANT HANDS

jesus christ. is this like some mental representation of what shit is currently like in Tomura’s mind? lots of crumbly destruction and traffic lights and the house his father built (isn’t it? I feel like it looks familiar), and SO MANY HANDS, HE JUST LOVES HIS HANDS

anyway so at this point it’s a coin toss whether or not anything in this fucking chapter is ever going to make any kind of fucking sense! but here I am voluntarily along for the ride while Gene Wilder sings that creepy boat song right in my ear!

DSFKLDSJ

ACCURATE REPRESENTATION OF SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN FLOATING IN A JAR FOR THREE MONTHS TBH. that is some luscious quarantine hair

SDFLKJSDLFKJSLKFDHLKSDJFLKJLKSDJL:FKJSDL:KJ

(ETA: that Tomura in the top left may be my new favorite panel. look at him. all he is is a nose and chin and ~*~HAIR~*~.)

HANAAAAAA AHHHHHH OH MY LORD OH MY LORD! OKAY I’M FINALLY PAYING ATTENTION NOW FOR REAL! NO MORE JOKES! EVERYBODY SHHHH!!!

FFFFFFFFFF

“LOOK AT ME I’M A MAIN CHARACTER I CAN HAVE STRANGE VISIONS AND TALK TO DEAD PEOPLE IN MY DREAMS, SOUND LIKE ANYBODY ELSE YOU KNOW?” TOMURA SHUT UP I DON’T HAVE TIME TO ANALYZE THIS SCENE THEMATICALLY RIGHT NOW I’M TOO BUSY BEING SAD ABOUT YOUR DEAD SISTER WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY CALCULATING THE ODDS OF THIS SOMEHOW BEING FORESHADOWING FOR HER NOT REALLY BEING DEAD. OH GOD, OH FUCK YOU GUYS, I’M FREAKING OUT

WHAT KIND OF YOUNGER BROTHER DOESN’T CALL HIS OLDER SISTER “NEECHAN” TOMURA WHAT KIND OF ANIME CHARACTER ARE YOU

AT THIS POINT HIS HAIR IS ITS OWN INDIVIDUAL CHARACTER WITH THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS WOW

HORIKOSHI PLEASE STOP SHAKING THIS CHAMPAGNE BOTTLE OF SIBLING FEELS SO VIGOROUSLY I AM SO TERRIBLY AFRAID OH GOD

“BY THE WAY TENKO I JUST HAVE TO SAY, YOUR MAN BOOBS ARE SERIOUSLY IMPRESSIVE AND YOU SHOULD BE VERY PROUD.” YES HANA I WAS JUST GOING TO SAY. HOW ASTUTE OF YOU TO POINT THAT OUT. BOY HAS BEEN HITTING THAT BOWFLEX

WTAF IS HIS HAIR THOUGH SERIOUSLY??!

IS IT JUST ME OR IS THIS DIALOGUE BUBBLE ACTUALLY COMING FROM THE HAIR ITSELF. TOMURA. TOMURA BLINK TWICE IF YOU ARE IN DANGER

SJJKJSKJSW

TENKO IT’S ME YOUR GIANT MOM I’M BEHIND YOU HONEY TURN AROUND AND LOOK HELLO HI I LOVE YOU DO YOU STILL WANT TO BE A HERO

ffff why is he so pretty all the time lately

you are very handsome with your billowy hair and ken doll abs, you. sure are having a lot of trippy visions for a dead guy too there

HEY!!!!

WHO SAID YOU WERE ALLOWED -- DO YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST -- ffffffffff I need to be alone with my thoughts for a few minutes fuck

okay well. but since it is getting late I guess we’ll just pack these feelings up real quick and put them inside a box and neatly label it “feelings I have about Tomura having a vision of his mom and immediately turning back into his innocent little boy self in said vision as soon as he sees her.” not too sure about the contents of this box yet but I will have to explore them thoroughly at a later date

oh hey it’s this asshole

“THAT WAS TWENTY YEARS AGO, DAD.” jesus Kotaro. get over it

and also guess what, if you go and get Tomura all riled up so he wakes up grumpy and disintegrates the first hapless guy he sees, I will hold you solely responsible for that poor man’s death. I’m just warning you now

oh my

I remember this conversation going a bit differently the last time, but hey

LOOOOOOL

HIGH FIVE. PUT ‘ER THERE

WHY WOULD YOU LOOK SO SURPRISED LOL DID YOU NOT JUST TURN TOWARDS HIM WITH A SINISTER MURDER FACE LIKE TWO SECONDS AGO. LIKE WTF DID YOU THINK WAS GONNA HAPPEN

OH NO OH SHIT

FUCK ME, GUESS IT WOULDN’T BE A DRAMATIC BNHA DREAM SEQUENCE IF THIS ASSHOLE DIDN’T MAKE AN APPEARANCE AT SOME POINT OR OTHER NOW WOULD IT

-- HOLY SHIT?!

RECORD SCRATCH, FREEZE FRAME??

holy shit. holy shit. holy shit. holy shit. holy shit. holy shit

holy shit. fuck

...okay so

is this implying that AFO has been Noumufied? but that doesn’t make any sense, does it? he already had multiple quirks. what other advantages could there be to him becoming a Noumu. well whatever I’m just typing out all of my thoughts real fast for the time being and I’ll try to make sense of them later

or is it because he sees Kurogiri as a father figure? and AFO also?

or is he using Kurogiri’s quirk????? IS HE SOMEHOW WARPING INTO TOMURA’S DREAMS

because that third one, to me, is what this panel most looks like? Tomura says he looks like Kuro, but he doesn’t though. Kuro has a very distinctive face which this is very much lacking. instead it looks to me much more like one of Kurogiri’s portals, with AFO’s buddhaesque smile sticking out. so yeah. I got nothin’. except, again, fuck

(ETA: yeah I obviously have more thoughts about this now, but we’ll get to those in a bit.)

...

.......

-- !!!!!!!!!!LKJLK!JLKJ

oh shit oh shit oh shit

OH SHIT

NO BABY NO DON’T DO IT

GASP

THEY’RE TRYING TO SAVE HIM AHHHH

I HAVE LIKE TEN THOUSAND THOUGHTS IN MY BRAIN RIGHT NOW YET SOMEHOW MY MIND IS ALSO STRANGELY BLANK?? I DON’T EVEN KNOW?? I’LL JUST KEEP READING

KOTARO ARE YOU TRYING TO HELP HIM OR ARE YOU PULLING HIM TOWARD AFO??

OH HE’S PUSHING HIM BACK!! OH SHIT IT’S A WHOLE FAMILY EFFORT

THEY’RE TRYING TO SAVE HIM AFO IS GOING TO TAKE HIM OVER AND THEY’RE TRYING TO PROTECT HIM OH GOD OH JESUS

BABY TENKO EYES OH MY GOD HE LOOKS SO MUCH LIKE DEKU THAT I THOUGHT IT WAS DEKU FOR A MOMENT

NO TENKO!!!

FUCK -- DOES HE NOT CARE? HE ACTUALLY UNDERSTANDS WHAT’S ABOUT TO HAPPEN BUT HE DOESN’T CARE?? IS HE TRULY SO PROFOUNDLY MISERABLE THAT HE’D GO AHEAD AND ACCEPT THIS FATE WILLINGLY

NO SOUNDS. NO WORDS. YOU COULD HEAR A PIN DROP IN MY ROOM RIGHT NOW

except that I have the most incredible, chilling, disturbing, electrifying feeling that my mental soundtrack is about to start blaring AFO’s theme from the anime on full blast...!

LOOOOOL SOB OH FUCKK

THE MOST TERRIFYING, DRAMATIC KIP UP YOU’VE EVER SEEN IN YOUR LIFE!! THIS IS IT, IT’S BEEN REAL FRIENDS, THIS IS WHERE WE DIE

-- ARE YOU REALLY, TRULY, GENUINELY SHITTING ME RIGHT NOW

NOW OF ALL TIMES IS WHEN WE FINALLY CUT TO THE TRIO, I’M CAN’T, I’M FUCK

AND THAT’S THE END AHHHHH

holy shit holy shit holy shit. wow

okay so. I don’t really have any sort of neat and tidy way to wrap up this hot mess of a recap lol. so, just... have a whole mess of all of my stupid whirling thoughts

those first four pages really did nothing to brace me at all lol

okay, so. here’s my understanding of all this, I guess. basically we’re going full Harry Potter rules here. AFO horcruxed his quirk, and from the looks of it, a piece of his soul (perhaps even the main piece) along with it. he then passed it on to Ujiko to implant into Tomura

horcrux!AFO then wakes up, and takes over Tomura. so then my understanding is that he’s going to be possessed by him. and I also got the impression that he’s fully aware of that, but just doesn’t care at this point. he knew his family was trying to warn him, but he didn’t care. and that look in his eyes when he disintegrated them just seemed so fucking resigned to me, though. jesus

but now the more interesting thing! so we can liken Tomura to the resurrected Voldemort from book 5 and onward, reborn after transferring his power into a new vessel. which would go a long way toward explaining how AFO was able to sense what was happening from all the way in Tartarus; because if we liken it to Voldemort and his horcruxes, it would mean that he still has a connection to them (similar to the connection between Voldemort’s mind and Harry’s)

but so now comes the really interesting thing -- what does this then imply about the connection between AFO and Deku? because you’ll recall that AFO alluded to a similar mental connection back when Deku first activated SIXQUIRKS. and now we have Deku somehow being magically aware of AFO’s sudden resurgent presence in this chapter. but why?? if the reason AFO and Tomura share a psychic link is because of a shared quirk, why would Deku also be experiencing the same link? the answer is, he wouldn’t -- unless he, too, had the same shared quirk

in other words, I think All for One for All is fucking confirmed you guys. I can’t think of any explanation for this other than that OFA is also a horcrux quirk. a little piece of AFO broken off and embedded in his brother, and then passed along through the generations. and now residing within Deku

anyway. so that’s a hell of a lot to ponder lol. I guess we can at least be grateful for the fact that we’re not waiting two weeks for chapter 271 like Hori originally planned. can you fucking imagine. what a fucking asshole lol

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thatbitchinsneakers · 4 years

Text

The Bachelorette Season 16 Episode 1

Hi everyone and welcome to ThatBitchInSneakers! While my identity remains a secret (for now), my unfiltered opinions on the hilariously pathetic franchise that we all know as The Bachelor/Bachelorette most definitely do not . I'm just gonna cut the crap of introducing myself cause literally nobody cares so without further ado, here we go with Season 16 Episode 1 of The Bachelorette.

Before we begin, a preview for the season just came on and it was like "you'll finally get some clare-ification" and some other dumb sentence saying "clare-voyant" (as if any of the 18-25 year old girls who watch this show fucking know what that means?) and all i can say if thank god her name isn't something like hmm idk TAYSHIA ????? cause there simply won't be a single play on words for that one. Bravo to the ABC summer interns for coming up with those!

This epsiode starts with Chris Harrison "surprising" Clare over Facetime telling her that she's the new bachelorette. Like she totally didn't see this coming even though she had her hair and makeup done and a full blown camera crew in her bedroom. Such a shock for Clare!

Ok, so she talks a lot about how her life/filming was flipped upside down because of this little thing going on in the world called a fucking pandemic. She's like "what should I do today? Should I get out of bed?" Like don't you have a full time job? Oh wait jk you take take instagram pics from home, I forgot.

She gets covid tested, thank you ABC, and is free to go makeout with tons of random men! Yay Clare! Chris Harrison delivering her test results had me WHEEZING. Like legally, how is allowed to give her her test results? Can he deliver my results? What about HIPPA? so many questions. not enough time. Moving on.

Some of the men are introduced and we find out that ABC spends a fuck load of money to put them up in their own rooms at a hotel in La Quinta, California (like sorry Clare the mansion is only reserved for people in their 20s) giving her, and all the men, free covid tests. Lucky them! I had to pay $250 for a rapid covid test so fuck u ABC. Anyway, the men are bored out of their minds in their hotel rooms working out, jacking off (probably), and flexing their muscles in the mirror.

Clare arrived to the mansion in a dress that looks similar to what I wore to my bat mitzvah (although the backless was a nice touch, Clare) and she sits down with her personal therapist, Chris Harrison, and we find out about her past relationships/500 times being on the show. Blah blah blah Chris Harrison legit does not give one fuck.

More men are introduced as they walk out of the limo to meet Clare and I'm honestly so impressed at how closely ABC and the NFL worked this season! Every other man on this show a former football player. Sorry to the "account executives" but you guys are outnumbered :/ Maybe next year!

Let's talk about the men.

First on my list of men to talk about is Eazy. He's fucking hot but like...Eazy? "Hi mom and dad this is my new boyfriend, Eazy. With a Z!" Mmm no sorry not gonna work. But tbh he should be the next bachelor because there are so many ways for the ABC interns to incorperate his name into the previews. "This next season is NOT gonna be Eazy" or "These girls are all so Eazy" idk just to name a few.

Jason, former football player, shows up pregnant! Haha! Good one, Jordan! Next.

Ivan gets out of the limo with some inspiring words from his mother, "Maganda ka" in Tagalog, which does actually mean "you are beautiful" (yes I looked it up cause I don't believe anything that comes out of a man's mouth these days). Points for you Ivan!

Kenny - boy band manager. Would absolutely love to know what boy band he could possibly manage.

Tyler C - Not the Tyler C I'm used to but whatever. Obsessed with the fact that the producers were like hey Tyler come here so we're gonna put you in a shitty little station wagon with a suitcase and a single lamp tied to the top and you're gonna pretend like you "packed up your entire life" to come here for Clare. Ok cool thanks! Quirky entrance #1- check!

Of course right after Tyler shows up in a disgusting station wagon, someone HAD to roll up in a Rolls Royce. Oh and guess who it is! That's right. The guy who went to Harvard! I wonder how long it's gonna take for him to mention that he went to Harvard. My guess is next episode.

Let's talk about some of the other entrances - Straight jacket? Full suit of armor? Like what drugs were these producers taking when they were like oh here's a great idea lets put a man in a straight jacket and then have him pretend he's here for love! Dumb.

Ok so then she meets Dale and her 39 year old ovaries literally explode. I don't blame her though because he's really hot but like relax bitch theres 30 other guys here trying to get into your pants like give it a sec. Obvi Chris Harrison comes out and is like "omg did you just say you think you met your husband? Wow in my 568 years of doing this show, I've never heard anyone say that so quickly." Clare, just breaking Bachelor records all around!

So now we're in the fake mansion, the drinks are flowing, Clare is having weird convos etc. This is usually the best part of the Bachelor/Bachelorette because everyone is literally so fucked up because they're drinking, for free, for like 8 hours straight. There's always random fights and people rolling their eyes and what not. But I was so disappointed that the only thing that happened was that one guy was like DMing randoms saying "hey beautiful" or whatever. before the show started filming. Like who cares ? Get over it. Clare sat them both down and was like ok figure it out my 39 year old uterus does not have any more time to waste.

I did love how Blake messaged her before the show being like "I'm here for you" because that's actually so sweet. Like to know that he did that when cameras weren't filming and reached out to her on insta to say he's excited for this to be over so he can meet her and he's here for her while she's going through shit is actually so sweet. If she doesn't keep Blake then I'm suing the Bachelor franchise.

Blah blah blah nothing else exciting. Dale gets the first impression rose, obvi, and then she ends up keeping the man who was DMing the girls before filming. Yosef, who she has already nicknamed "Yo". Then the rose ceremony which is literally at 9am the next day like the sun is fully up.

To sum up this episode, I'd say it fucking sucked. This doesn't feel like the normal Bachelor/Bachelorette at all. Idk if it's the fact that Clare is 100 years old and not the usual girl that is fresh out of college and a self proclaimed Instagram model, but it just doesn't feel right.

Can't say I'm looking forward to it, but see yall next week!

Kisses,

That Bitch In Sneakers

Official "I love that" count: 9

Official "I needed this" count: 6

#bachelor bahcelorette funny thatbitchinsneakers clarecrowley

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movedto-jewishbucke · 4 years

Note

Fanfic pet peeves ?

I’m gonna focus on, like, the things fanfic authors do that are bigoted rather than focus on, like, stylistic choices because I don’t want to unintentionally put down other writers.

[TW: antisemitism/nazism mention, nsfw, homophobia, transphobia]

fetishization of any group, but I see people fetishize gay men, people of color (I see it A LOT with Carlos), and trans people in fandom spaces

literally oppressed x oppressor (for example, Nazi x Jewish character - yes this is something I’ve seen and yes it is the source of my depression) (tbh there’s a lot I could list but I won’t... just stop being weird y’all... lmao. also if ANYONE pulls that “but I like enemies to lovers!!!” bullshit I will SNIPE you! what I just listed is not enemies to lovers. enemies to lovers is Peter Parker x Harry Osborn or Charles Xavier x Erik Lehnsherr or for ppl who don’t know who those characters are, enemies to lovers would include Billy Tyson x Owen Strand) (also oppressed x oppressor probably wasn’t the best way to like... sum up that b/c technically oppressed x oppressor includes Judd/Grace lmao but you know what I mean)

also y’all can, like, stop going “Tyler Kennedy Strand, born Taylor Kira Strand,” because it’s weird lmao. if you’re trans (esp a trans kid), it’s like... whatever imo because I used to do that a lot. however. if you are cis, do better lmao. it’s just, like, there are better ways to show a character is trans than to, like, a) give them a deadname and b) share that deadname in the first sentence

desexualizing mlm? like... we have a spectrum in the fanfic world. on one end people are oversexualizing mlm and on the opposite end they’re desexualizing mlm and they’re both Bad. I’m not gonna get into this much cause I’ve been trying to sneeze for five minutes and Can’t so I’m gonna wrap this post up so I can cry. anyway. if you’re not a mlm (or wlw) you really should rethink how you view (and write) mlm relationships. (this bullet point is NOT saying you have to write nsfw content btwn two men Just to avoid desexualizing mlm b/c I don’t write nsfw content (cause I’m suffering from an illness called internalized homophobia) and I don’t think the content I do produce is desexualizing mlm) anyway I’m done with this bullet point

just... people need to be more aware of how they’re writing minority identities and do their research, yanno? like that’s all I’m asking lmao

also this post isn’t saying you’re an awful irredeemable piece of shit if you do any of these things, it’s just saying... be more mindful of how you write minority identities going forward

#about #please just treat minority identities with respect lmao #Anonymous

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allhallowsreid · 4 years

Text

just lots and lots of very long-winded, random thoughts about last night’s finale and the show itself...

so obvs no one has to agree with me on any of this, i just feel like there likely ARE ppl who feel like this and it’s easy to get shut down on tumblr for having different opinions, and i mostly just need to gather my feelings and thoughts in one place.

-ive seen a handful of ppl upset that the last ep centered around reid, but if you were to take 10 fans of this show, it’s a pretty good chance that 8 or 9 of them would say reid is their fave character. that isn’t me trying to insult any of the other characters, that’s just the way it is. whether it’s bc of his looks (and my lord was he gorgeous in this finale ep), or that he’s your typical cute white boi, or more organic reasons like he’s been there since day 1 and we were able to watch him change and grow, and he’s the opposite of the typical male characters we often see, especially on cop shows.. whatever the reason, he is a VERY popular tv character. and if it weren’t for that character, for better or worse, this show would have ended a long time ago.

-the ending itself.. i just feel like i don’t know what ppl were expecting?? this is not a show like supernatural or dexter or a show that has had a fluent overarching story to tell from start to finish. the story continues without us watching it. it’s another day at the office for them. was it a great ending? no, but it was fine. we see where all of them are headed. endings are so difficult, i’m just glad they didn’t kill anyone off or some garbage like that.

-so damn happy they hooked up luke and garcia. i have had such issues with garcia’s character since morgan left, i feel like she became a caricature, where she just overacts and i recently read an article with kirsten where she actually admitted that when shemar left she really didn’t know what to do with her character anymore. honestly? it showed. the obnoxiousness to luke was cute at first bc she obviously had a crush on him, but then it just became mean and out of character. this season i was happy to see her get a little bit more back to herself. all this being said, they were very clearly headed towards getting luke and garcia together this season with the overt flirting and one on one convo’s, i’m so glad they went through with it instead of leaving it open ended. and i will admit that of all the characters, i didn’t think garcia would be the one to leave, but it made sense. garcia is tough as hell, much tougher than she gives herself credit for, but like luke said, she can do this other job without the gore that she cringes over in literally every single episode of the show. also loved jj saying garcia was the glue of the team. so true, so well said. and side note, kirsten does a hell of a job writing these characters that she knows all too well, the other writers should’ve just let her take over in later seasons.

-prentiss... i love my emily so dang much, but man they give her the absolute worst dialogue. she gets stuck with all these long sentences that just.. they just don’t flow?? and it takes me out of the show so often. this has been since s12 when she became unit chief. there has been a handful of times since she became the boss that we have had flashes of old school smartass goth girl emily, and i cherished each moment, but it wasn’t enough. somewhere along the way they forgot how to write into the show that their characters had PERSONALITY. just as an example of the stupid dialogue she gets.. the end of the ep where it’s intended to look like rossi’s retirement party. then, idk who it was, emilys boyfriend maybe(?) says some dumb comment about oh gee i thought this was dave’s retirement! and then emily starts some awkwardly long line that could’ve been summed up in “dave decided not to retire afterall” and it was just soooo... weird?!!? if we are agreeing that A MONTH has gone by.. you are to tell me that it never once came up that dave said he was gonna retire and then changed his mind!??! that night, one month later, is the first that this discussion occurred!!?!?! and all of these dumb lines come out sounding so robotic, and i can’t blame paget, bc the lines are boring as hell. also unless i missed something i can’t rule emily out of being the next director, especially since their profile ended up being correct, lynch and the mom didn’t kill themselves, so i’m sure when that all came out, the next hurdle emily would have to clear is how they just blew up their very expensive jet right after having a budget meeting 2 episodes ago!!

- i’m gonna lump the newer characters together.. and just say that it was all too little, too late. they tried to give matt and luke more this season, and the ep’s centered on them were great, but it all felt forced to me. all this character development should’ve started as soon as they came onto the show. the relationships between the new and original characters also feels forced a lot of times, barring relationships like rossi and his boys, luke and garcia, tara and emily.. i mean that’s kind of all, right? we never saw much off-the-job, personal interactions between them and the rest of the characters, did we? and the way tara was treated on this show is inexcusable. aisha’s talents were so underused on this show it was criminal (pun intended). and actually, the above stuff i said about emily getting nonsense dialogue, you can throw matt in there too. his dialogue was friggin god awful at times on this show. in the words of early seasons reid, maybe try to be more conversational, writers!!

-man oh man was jj a badass and a half in this finale. tbh i always enjoyed liaison jj more than ssa jj, but when badass jj comes out i get all excited. i do feel like she would be the best fit to take over if emily left, she’d stepped into that role before and excelled. but she is another character that at times i think the writers just forgot how to write her personality somewhere along the way. i understand that the reality is that people change over time, but there were times that she was written like a typical high school mean girl, and that was just an insult to the character they created. the whole jeid thing was severely overblown and unnecessary. i don’t hate the idea of them being together, but why wait til s14-15 to deal with this? in the end i thought it was handled okay, i personally didn’t feel like it ruined their friendship or stayed awkward, which i appreciated, it was just a storyline that wasn’t needed and wasted time. also, ppl griping about “oh but she clearly loves will, if she loves spencer then she can’t love will!” i mean, actually, ppl are capable of loving more than one person at a time, hate to burst that bubble for ya.

-this seems like a good moment though to pause and just get this out about will lamon-fuckin-tagne jr... this guy is too good for jj lol, i am sorry but he is such a great guy. and can we review some things about will and his wife’s bestest friend, godfather to his children, spencer reid?? when will and spencer first met, it was during an unbelievably personal case to will, i mean his father died sending him a message about this case that the fbi was called in on. and his first intro with reid?? let’s see, reid spent that ep strung out on drugs, and full on abandoning the case to go hang out with his friend at a club/bar/lounge/whatever. ok, so that’s will’s first impression of jj’s bestie, and will STILL okay’d him being the godfather of his kids. not to mention, can you imagine your wife has been gone in the damn middle east for who even knows how long, then when she finally gets back and you think you’re gonna have her to yourself, but oh no, here comes jj’s friggin bestie again to come cry on the couch every night for several weeks!!!! and he gives zero indication of not liking spencer, in fact he seems rather fond of him. will is the most patient man ever, i swear.

-ok that was an unexpected side track. moving onto rossi. not sure why they were all like oh pfft this guy will never retire. the dude literally retired before the show started lol. if he retired once, when he was fairly young, why is the idea of it happening again so impossible? again, dumb dialogue. i loved the stuff with him and young gideon (i may be biased tho bc i’m just so damn proud of ben savage), i loved that rossi knew more about the jet than the others, however that was an inconsistency bc when rossi came back from retirement, he couldn’t believe the bau had its own jet. unless i just misunderstood what emily meant when she said it all started with rossi and gideon. i felt like lynch was a very underwhelming villain. super forgettable. there was no charisma like foyet or cat adams, there was no creep factor like mr scratch, there was no mystery like the replicator or the fisher king. his whole story just fell flat, and if there were anything interesting about him whatsoever, it’s bc of what rossi brought to the table, not the “chameleon”.

-my boy reid. he has several lifetimes of baggage to unpack, and i think of all the characters on this show, no one hates unpacking their trauma more than reid. i feel like it was so relatable that he could barely speak in this ep without sounding on the verge of tears, like every sentence was painful to even get out bc of how much hurt is stored up inside him. his trauma has defined him for years now, and if they had ended the show without addressing even some of it, the show would’ve been incomplete. i understand that actors schedules just don’t work out sometimes, but idk what the point was of having strauss and foyet be his devil and angel. and foyet’s long explanation of how bc he changed hotch, he changed the team was so convoluted that he may as well have just said “they couldn’t get james van der beek or the dude who played mr scratch, so im here instead”. i liked what they did with reid and maeve, and i actually don’t mind that there was no mention of max. they’re still very early in their relationship, and i feel like him coming out with some “wait i think i love max!” revelation would just be too fast and ooc. we already know that the relationship between them is growing, it doesn’t need to be said. and can i get an amen that maeve and reid didn’t kiss bc god that would’ve been weird as hell.

- i hate that we couldn’t have hotch or morgan or blake or elle or any of the main characters that helped make this show what it was, but i’m still grateful for the crumbs they gave us if the actors just couldn’t be booked for whatever reason. i’ve seen many shows at their end just try to pretend their previous characters never existed, so that we got some flashbacks with them was appreciated.

- RIP bau jet. i wiiiill reMEMber youuuuuuu.

-the song choice of david bowie’s Heroes was perfection. strangely, when i was driving home from work yesterday that song came on my playlist and i blasted it on repeat and performed a car concert for my fellow drivers on the road, and thought to myself that this song would be great for cm to end on. never thought they would actually do it since they had previously used the song in penelope’s ep. but what a great scene of all them dancing and singing and laughing like the bunch of nerdy idiots they are.

-i came late into the game with this show. ppl have been telling me for years to watch it and i only picked up watching in s13, after i read a spn/cm crossover fic and became super curious about who all these awesome characters were. with that said, i’m aware that since i haven’t invested years of my life in this show, that my feelings and thoughts about the ending will be different than those who have been hooked on this show for over a decade. i’m still just so thankful for the family portrayed by this show, and these characters i fell in love with, and episodes i’ll never forget.

#text posts #series finale #thx for reading if u took the time to do so :-)#criminal minds

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atopearth · 5 years

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Shall We Date? Love Tangle Part 15 - Yamato Uzuki and Angelo De Ponte Routes

I’m kinda happy that Yamato’s childhood friend is Naoki, haven’t seen him in a while so it’s nice to see him in the story again~ Poor Naoki got sick and the heroine had to go pick Yamato up instead! I quite like Yamato, he’s really passionate and strong to come all the way to Kaleido to open up his own dojo to spread awareness about kendo, very admirable! Also really cool that the one who renovated the place was Angelo, an architect seems cool! I’m kinda excited for the future route with the captain of the ship though, I like him hahaha. It was so cute to see how awkward they were when she nearly fell down after kneeling for too long and he caught her. She still ended up hitting her forehead because they were so awkward about touching each other haha. Whoaaa, Angelo designed Lilac Court (the place where the heroine and all the guys live in)! Ooh I see, Nathaniel created this place for people striving to make their dreams come true so that they would have somewhere comfortable to stay in as they worked their hardest, and I guess that’s why all the love interests are kinda differentiated by the job they have?

Like, I do enjoy Angelo’s idea of understanding the sum of a person’s preferences to know what they’re comfortable in to know more about how they would like their house to be, but it’s difficult to have that date he had with the heroine with every client~ But I guess he only did that specially for her to show her, and in terms of her learning to perceive what is best for the Kaleido leopards from their perspective instead of just a human’s, this date was very useful for her to understand that so she can provide the best environment for them. Gotta admit that Angelo is pretty captivating though, that first CG is nice!😍 Next thing you know, Angelo’s gonna have designed every important building in this city loll! Anyway, not sure if I actually like how that gymnasium looks lol, but his intentions on wanting it to bridge intercultural connections through its design and everything sounds really cool. Like Yamato says, he doesn’t get it much design wise, but his thoughts of wanting to show and bring kendo to different cultures is a similar intention😆

Yamato is so honest and sincere with his words that it’s hard to resist… So cute when he was drunk and was saying how cute she was etc. He’s so forward in his own way! Although, I have to say, following him to his dojo and then taking up his offer of drinking sake with him and then drinking so much could be dangerous, heroine! You’re lucky he’s a good boy lol! It was so sweet when she told Angelo how she blacked out, fell asleep (Yamato fell asleep too!) and didn’t want to wake Yamato up so she came home alone, and Angelo said from now on he should tell her these things because he’d pick her up no matter where she is, how nice🥰 Not surprised that the guy Yamato was talking to harshly was a fellow kendo practitioner that considers Yamato as a rival because he keeps losing to him, and yet he doesn’t practice kendo properly and only wants to win through dirty methods. It was pretty cute when Yamato tried to ask the heroine to dinner but was shy XD

Wow, that rival guy is such a dirty prick. He actually hired people to go attack Yamato! It’s a win win situation either way as well, since if Yamato fights, he’ll be disqualified from the competition and if he doesn’t, he’ll get injured. Pretty disgusting behaviour for a sportsman. At least we got to see how brave Yamato was to protect the heroine from them all and to listen to her and not fight back since she wants to see him in the competition. It’s so cute how all the guys praise Yamato for being a good guy that can’t talk to girls properly but is very sincere, and lol at him being super honest when he gets drunk. Guess he really liked the heroine when he first met her lol. Lmao at everyone asking Angelo to add different recreational spaces, especially Miguel wanting a gigantic pool🤣 it’s kinda cute how Angelo seems to support Yamato’s love for the heroine but also likes to tease him about it by getting close to the heroine and making him jealous lol. I’m not surprised that Yamato is silly enough to forget there’s only one bedding haha. So cute when he tried to confess to her but couldn’t say it🤣 It was so like him to end up practising so that they wouldn’t have to fully share the bedding together whilst being awake lol.

Omg, metal pipes?! The heroine could have died! Lucky Yamato pushed her out of the way in time but as the cliche goes, his arm got injured and it’ll take a month to heal~ how will he participate in his tournament now? Well, as expected, he just pushed himself and won anyway because he’s awesome, even though his opponent was dodgy AGAIN by loosening that white band that keeps the bamboo sword together. AND as expected, it went with the cliche route of Yamato being nice and acknowledging his rival and the rival said he did all that crap because he thought Yamato never acknowledged him as one, so he apologises or whatever that I don’t care because no, that was very unsatisfactory! I’m so disappointed in how they ended the kendo part, like seriously? The guy did SO MANY THINGS that were crimes and that could have killed them and it was all because of something so silly that could be resolved in two sentences? He didn’t have any hatred, he was annoyed that he thought he wasn’t acknowledged. He’s even worst than I thought. If he was a downright guy that was obsessed with winning, yeah, I can see why he’d do all that, but no he wanted Yamato to acknowledge his skills as his rival? Can I ask, which part of him trying to cheat all the time would make anyone think he is a worthy rival? Why would they? Can this guy even reflect on his actions before blaming other people for not acknowledging him? Even to the end, he’s still just some selfish no name. The way they resolved it was just disappointing and disgusting because it doesn’t even address the problem properly. Ugh. Anyway, Yamato finally confessed and we’re done. Honestly, it was an all right route, but that ending just annoyed me. Yamato is your typical shy, determined and cute guy, but yeah, average route with an annoying story with the career part so yeah, I don’t think I like this route lol.

So I guess Angelo is the type that got so used to always asking for what people like and catering to them (due to his job), so he’s kinda forgotten about what he likes and wants? Loll, luckily Angelo was able to clear everything up about renovations before the demolition rumours got out of hand. I think the date the heroine prepared was very thoughtful and nice. She knew it’d be hard for him to choose stuff out of nowhere, so she prepared options for him to choose from as they went along the day and so everything they ended up doing was something Angelo would have liked to do or eat, it was very nice of her to do that imo. I feel like it was kindaaa ridiculous how they wanted to show that Angelo has emotions and can get agitated over the heroine through the construction foreman being annoyed at how Angelo and her was stopping them from working because the materials were cheap and crappy ones they didn’t ask for. Like, how dodgy can you get and how immature can you get to try and deal with the problem physically? And..they out the dodgy guy trying to profit from using cheap materials lol. I don’t know why the story decided near the end that they thought they should do something related to Angelo’s job so…superficially? It’s such a superficial problem to happen and was really unnecessary? It doesn’t add anything to Angelo’s character nor does it show his emotional growth? I feel like regardless of what happened with the heroine, he still would have acted the same way.

And they set up the guy to talk about all his wrongdoings whilst the police listen in, yep the villains are always so silly. Then Angelo confesses and stays in Kaleido, happy ending~ Yeah, that was really more bland than I thought. I honestly thought you’d get to see more of Angelo’s work life and style but instead they just added some random villain out of nowhere near the end to make some “problem” appear and then they get together. I also thought it was so boring how they got together, I felt like in the common route, Angelo and the heroine got along nicely and had more chemistry than Yamato, but once it came to his own route, it just felt so lacklustre with how things were handled. Tbh, even though I didn’t like the “problem” in Yamato’s route, I at least felt more feelings towards it than Angelo’s story, pretty disappointing😪

#shall we date love tangle

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gateau-chocolat · 5 years

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hotel del luna final thoughts (+ other misc kdrama talk)

ok a) this is gonna be another one where I have nothing much to say beyond “it was really good!!” and b) everyone has watched hotel del luna already, but guys......did you know.......hotel del luna is really good.........

Just like Rookie Historian, this is another one where if I could sum it up in one sentence I’d say it was just really solid all around? The plot held my interest throughout, everything came together well, good acting, nice costumes, directing was fine as far as I could tell....I just don’t have anything bad to say lol.

I would say it’s at least in my top 5 kdramas, maybe even top 3? :0

IU is g r e a t and Yeo Jin-goo was fine. (I was able to totally forget about Absolute Boyfriend!) Man-wol/Chan-seong was not like...the most romantic couple? but their interactions and relationship development over the course of the show were good.

I’d also be happy to watch any of the other main actors/actresses in something else! Kang Mi-na is cute so I’m guessing she’ll probably get more roles in the future? I’d definitely watch like....a light and fluffy high school story with her in it, or something.

As soon as I started this series I was like “oh no I’m gonna get so emotionally wrecked by all these ghosts” and that was 100% TRUE, I was fucked up over EVERY SINGLE GHOST. 😭

Overall the way that the show slowly doled out little bits of info about Man-wol’s backstory while doing various ghost plotlines worked well for me.

I was a little surprised at first when they resolved Man-wol’s feelings about her past relatively quickly? I was a little like “ok, so not much is going to happen for the last two episodes?” Similarly, at first I was expecting that the final conflict was going to be some kind of big dramatic “nooo I can’t pass on now because I love you so much”/”noooo don’t pass on I love you so much” thing, but in the end I really liked the more lowkey ending of all the ghost characters passing on at their own pace. In general I really liked the way that death (or like....going to the afterlife? they’re already dead I guess) was portrayed as inevitable but not hugely scary or tragic, because all the characters had come to terms with it.

Everything was wrapped up really well in the end, even little things like Man Wol’s obsession with Kim Joon Hyun and the writer ghost finally getting a project to write.

Btw I SCREAMED @ the transition of Hyeon Jung’s sister sliding the door open....this show really played my emotions like a fiddle lol. 😭

....Okay, so what to watch next?

I’ve only been watching one other kdrama at the moment, Melo is My Nature (/Be Melodramatic/Melo Suits Me). (STRONGLY recommend btw, both the funny stuff and the emotional stuff is so on point.) I was kind of interested in The Tale of Nokdu and Miss Lee, but I watched the first 2 episodes of Nokdu and just...felt no urge at all to continue (there wasn’t anything really bad about it? just....meh 🤷‍♀️), and Miss Lee seems to have vanished off the face of the earth once it actually started airing?

One Spring Night has been on my to-watch list for quite a while, but tbh I’ve been watching more “realistic” dramas lately, and I’ve been watching historical/fantasy dramas.... I think right now what I really want is full-on escapist “”problematic”” romance fantasy with like....an arrogant chaebol male lead and an extremely nice and sweet but down on her luck female lead, the whole nine yards lol. (This isn’t really like that, but I dumped Romance is a Bonus Book about halfway through bc I just couldn’t suspend disbelief for it, but I might actually go back and finish it now? Hmm.)

#hotel del luna #kdrama

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otomates-a · 5 years

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For the muses that don't have the special voiced lines available.. What do you imagine they sound like?

Ah, yes, talking about my muse’s voices… my favorite activity…

This kind of goes hand in hand with the accent headcanon I answered a little bit ago, so I’ll link that here too, since I’ll restate some of it briefly for relevancy.

I don’t really have voice claims right now because that’s… a lot of effort, but maybe I’ll get around to that one day.

Under a read more because this one is LONG KJNHMKJHNM.

For the Voltage characters (currently) without V/C content,

↪ Prince Edward

Again, super 👏 SUPER 👏 thick French accent.

Very soft. Never raises his voice, even when angry or passionate. Typically has to clear his throat before speaking to garner attention to avoid being drowned out.

Whispers more than talking normally.

People often note that Edward in general has a very “melodic” tone of voice.

Bonus: doesn’t laugh so much as let out very quiet giggles.

↪ Prince Keith

Boy’s got a New York accent going on and we appreciate him.

Often speaks loudly enough to be heard over people in his immediate vicinity.

Has a a slightly lower-pitched voice that tends to get a little higher and squeakier when he’s getting upset or bitching about smth lmao.

That said, will mostly often speak normally with a very bored “are we done yet” tone of voice.

Bonus: always muffles his laugh by covering his mouth with both hands.

↪ Prince Roberto

He’s got that Spanish accent going on.

Excited, energetic, just happy to be here!! He has a bit of a higher pitched voice, so whenever he tries to do a deeper voice impression and sound “super serious” it’s actually just really silly to hear.

Constantly yelling and going a mile a minute or singing or whatever.

He will get serious for real sometimes, though, and when he does, his voice is always gentle / calming and full of emotion. He’s very soothing.

Bonus: will roll over on the floor laughing unironically. very loudly.

↪ Prince Wilfred

Soft, British and would rather not be having a conversation lmao

He’s even more quiet than Edward, but it’s mostly because he doesn’t like talking to people.

His voice is extremely monotone and devoid of emotion. He sounds like a robot reciting lines, which is true both when speaking to him in person or when he’s giving a speech. This is something that doesn’t ever go away completely, even if he falls in love with a person, though they’ll hear more emotion in his voice than most get the chance to.

If caught in the right moment, sometimes he almost sounds like he’s on the verge of tears, though.

Bonus: laughs are very short and breathy… more like a quick ‘aha’ than an actual laugh.

↪ Prince Yakov

I hope you like Russian accents thicker than this prince’s beautiful braid, because he’s undoubtedly got the thickest / most noticeable accent out of the princes if only due to limited chances to actually put the other languages and dialects he’s learned to good use!

Very loud! Very demanding! But also very approachable. He can be extremely stern or extremely welcoming and his voice drastically changes between disciplined / friendly as needed.

Bonus: he laughs a lot. And his laugh is also super loud and boisterous.

↪ Luke

Much more subtle New York accent compared to Keith ‘cuz he suppresses it.

Very timid & gentle normally. He’s got a quiet, hesitant tone of voice because he’s usually pretty unsure of himself.

When he’s getting on to someone or trying to stand up for himself or scold other people, though, he also gets kind of high pitched and squeaky because he’s a puppy like that. Eventually, this matures and he inherits his grandfather’s skills in scolding people sternly lmao.

Bonus: will try to hide laughter by covering his mouth with the back of his hand, but will fail.

↪ Claude

British boi #2.

Stern as all living hell. If ever a voice could send chills down your spine, it would be Claude’s. He’s an extremely serious person and he’s not playing games, man.

That said, in rare moments when he shows his softer side, he can be very gentle and warm. It’s just unlikely.

Bonus: hell will freeze over before you hear this man laugh.

↪ Zain

Does have a very subtle English accent as a result of his time with Nobel Michel, but his is hard to distinguish. He’s one of those ppl everyone will stand around like “what???? is that accent???? what is it, it sounds like 5 different accents, i can’t????”

Elegant and sophisticated, at all times, his voice reflects that. He’s always proper and calm, so his tone is likewise monotone, but in a kindhearted way, as opposed to Wilfred’s robotic voice.

Will easily become very expressive and full of emotion when impassioned, however, no matter how hard he tries not to.

Bonus: very soft chuckles.

↪ Ryuga

Loud and happy! He’s super energetic and friendly and that shows through in how he speaks.

His voice is on the lower / gruffer side, however.

Kind of has a very very vERY subtle hint of a British accent sometimes because of where he grew up, but mostly maintained a Japanese accent from his family.

Bonus: EXCITABLE, UPBEAT LAUGHTER !! LAUGHS FOR /DAYS/

↪ Roy

British accent so thick he actually has trouble being understood depending on what part of the world he’s sailing in. Took after his mother.

Mostly speaks with a quiet, thoughtful tone of voice, like he’s always lost in his own head.

He’s very expressive though, so if he gets startled or has strong emotions over something/someone, etc, his voice will raise in volume and panic and etc.

Bonus: he’s the type to laugh behind his hand and muffle it

↪ Shin

Thick Czech accent, not as pronounced as Roy’s.

Extremely intimidating and hard to approach. He always sounds either strict, angry, or annoyed. Mostly because he’s probably all three of those things.

Even when he tries to be soft, he can come off as mean. He takes a little work, but eventually, he learns how to come off as gentle.

Bonus: doesn’t laugh so much as snort derisively.

↪ Miyabi

Has two settings: obnoxious and serious, which he will usually switch between throughout the day

He constantly sounds really full of himself and full of mockery, despite seriously lacking in confidence lmao

His actual tone of voice is mild. He’s very emotional, though, and can sound scary or loving depending on what buttons are pushed.

Can also sound pretty sensual / seductive at times, too.

Bonus: medium-toned laugh, directly in your face KJNHMKJNM

↪ Ichthys

Check accent hc for details on him, he’s more complicated I’m crying.

That being said, one of the louder / happier sounding out of the muse group. He’s constantly laughing and putting on airs for people, so he always sounds like he’s having a great time.

As for the actual tone of his voice, he’s one of the few i DO have a voice claim for yay

Bonus: can and will go into long laughing fits

↪ Rhion / Mad Hatter

Switches depending on what persona he’s “playing.”

If he’s just being himself, he’s very soft, unsure, quiet, but friendly. He’ll openly show his emotions and usually sound pretty happy / upbeat, but it’s like he’s lost in a different world, daydreaming.

As the Hatter, he’s SUPER loud and dramatic and over-the-top, because he’s putting on a show. He’ll drag words out and make drama out of sentences that are super mundane.

Bonus: snorts when he laughs, thanks.

↪ Yuya

This one is easy, let’s all just accept that Yuya is obviously a ripoff of Kurosawa Yamato and obviously his voice is going to match up 😂😂😂

Bonus: tends to burst out laughing if he finds smth funny

For the non-Voltage muses who don’t already have voiced lines in their respective games,

↪ Chezem

Thick Arabic accent.

EXTREMELY soft and aloof. He literally sounds like he’s speaking through a vacuum because he mumbles and trails off so often. His head is up in the clouds.

Deeper voice.

When upset, can be very scary and stern, has a habit of intimidating people and purposefully trying to run them off by presenting himself this way, but actually very soft in reality.

Bonus: brief, short laughs that sound more like sighs.

↪ Saizo

Tone of voice can be summed up as “constantly exasperated” and “really wishes he weren’t here right now.” He ALWAYS sounds like he’s annoyed or sighing at someone’s stupidity any time he opens his mouth.

Deep voice, which I actually have a VC of Jun Fukuyama for. My cg bias shows through, but there u go.

Bonus: usually has short, unexpected laughter in which he tries to keep it from coming out.

↪ Munenori

Upper-class and elegant. He sounds kinda snobby, but not in an obnoxious way. He uses long, big words and tends to trail off to enunciate quite often.

Is the type of person to pause mid-sentence and go… ‘hmm…………………’ while regarding the person he’s talking to for a long while before continuing lmao

Also has a very deep voice, but speaks lightly compared to anyone else in the NL group. His way of speaking is just… very “airy,” like he’s just breathing the words, idk how to put it

Bonus: has the softest chuckles out of anyone in this blasted group

↪ Lysandre

Thick French accent 2 : electric boogaloo

Has a lot in common with Chezem, tbh, so I’m gonna reiterate: soft and aloof. He literally sounds like he’s speaking through a vacuum because he mumbles and trails off so often. His head is up in the clouds.

However, he maintains his softness even when he gets emotional or angry. He can be stern, yes, but he doesn’t lose his poise. He’s extremely put-together and graceful.

Voice isn’t very deep, he also tends to sound kind of “airy” when speaking

Bonus: rarely laughs, mostly smiles… but has a breathy laugh when he does

↪ Chase

Australian accent !

Sounds super tired and dead inside all the time. He just wants to go home and sleep and for everyone to leave him alone my dude. He’s always scoffing while talking, so he can sound pretty stuck up.

Medium-toned voice, not high pitched, not deep, just right in the middle.

Tends to drag out words because he sounds pretty bored most of the time. That is to say, he’s pretty monotone.

However, voice starts to perk up when he starts brightening up around someone he cares about. He can actually sound pretty happy and loving near constantly, around the right person.

Bonus: snickers rather than laughs. unless he’s with someone he adores, then he’ll laugh rather loudly.

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bandblogging · 6 years

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We can be a mess together (Ashton Irwin imagine)

Pairing: Ashton Irwin X Reader

Sum.: After a night out you weren't sure what happened what happened between you and him and in the meantime you confessed your love to him but it won't work out at first.

Words: 3476 (whoops)

Warning: swearing

A/N: tbh swearing in imagines should just be given in my writing, also I am still shit at summaries. I wanted to post this all week but idk it just took forever to write 'cos idk

______

When you woke up you felt incredibly uncomfortable. You were way too hot, a body was laying half on you, almost crushing you. Your bladder was about to burst and you felt a headache approach. You tried to shove the body from yours and when you finally got out of the bed you rushed to the bathroom.

When you re-entered the bedroom you stared at the bed for a while trying to understand what had happened. The person laying there was nobody new to you and you had spent multiple nights sleeping next to him but it felt different this time. The way he was laying there in only his underwear, his hair ruffled and covering his face. Ashton was still half covered by the blanket and his chest was raising evenly, indicating he was still sleeping. Clothes were threwn around the room and you were too only in your underwear.

You could remember leaving the party with Ashton and Luke and getting a taxi back to the hotel. After that you couldn't remember anything anymore, not even leaving the car. You were in Ashton's hotel room and so you had no other choice than putting on your old clothes again. You tried to distract yourself but you couldn't stop thinking about all the things that could have happened. You have had a secret crush on him for a while now and the thought of sleeping with him because you were drunk made you worry. If that really happened it would become incredibly awkward between you two, especially if you couldn't remember anything.

You had found your phone in your purse together with your hotelroom keycard. After collecting all your stuff you walked towards the door but before even getting there your heard shuffling behind you. Ashton had sat up and leaned on the headboard of the bed, "Are you leaving?" You turned around, shoes and purse in hand, your hair and makeup in a mess, "Don't you think it's awkward enough already?" He raised an eyebrow and rubbed his eyes, "What are you talking about?" "Don't play with me Ashton, I can't remember anything and I wake up in just my underwear", you open the door and wanted to leave before it became mortifying. Before you closed the door you heard a 'What?' and some more shuffling behind you but you walked down the hallway as fast as you could. When you entered your room you let your things fall to the ground and hid your face in your hands.

A few minutes later you were standing in the shower trying to wash off last night's makeup. You shed a few tears, not knowing how to feel or what to think. When you finally left the shower and got dressed again, you checked your phone. There was a text from Ashton at the top of your notification. 'Please let me in, I can explain this', it was sent 5 minutes ago. You took a deep breath and decided to check if he was still there, hoping for an innocent explanation. In the back of your mind you didn't think he would be waiting there, why would he wait for more than 5 minutes without knowing if you would even want to talk to him.

To your surprise he was sitting next to the door when you opened it. He looked up and stood up quickly. "Y/N", he walked into your hotel room and closed the door behind you two. "I'm sorry I didn't realize what you meant earlier", he sat down next to you on the bed and took your hand. "But what happened Ash? I can't remember anything after getting in that taxi with you guys. I don't know what was in that last shot but damn I woke up in your bed and I don't know", you shook your head in confusion. "Y/N! You fell dead asleep in that car. I carried you into the hotel and because I didn't know where your room was I took you to mine. And the reason you were undressed is simply because I didn't want you to sleep in uncomfortable clothes all night.", he sounded sincere but there was almost a hint of anger in his voice that you didn't expect. "I'm sorry", you let your head hang low, you felt stupid for thinking that anything else would have happened. "Did you", he took a deep breath clenching his hand around yours, "Did you really think I would do anything else? That I would use you or take advantage of you being drunk?" He looked at you with gritted teeth and your stomach turned into a knot. You felt nauseous and guilty, a part of you obviously didn't believe that you two would have done anything but when you woke up and couldn't remember everything you simply felt a little unsure. "No not really, I don't know. I'm sorry I just I had no idea what happened and I didn't trust myself, to be honest.",your cheeks turned red and all you wanted to do was to pull your hand away from his because it felt like it was burning up. His expression softened slightly but there was still this look of anger on his face. " What do you mean? I would never take advantage of you, you should know that!", the tone of his voice sounded like dissapointment and anger at the same time. Your eyes darted around the room trying to avoid eye contact as much as possible. You couldn't stand the look that was on his face, it hurt you to see him like this, because of you. You took a deep breath, trying to form a sentence that made sense.

"I was worried that me being drunk meant that I would do something that I would never have the courage to do when I am sober", your head hang low, still trying to avoid eye contact.

"I don't understand you? What do you mean? Why for once, Y/N, why can't you just say what you mean?", you saw him shaking his head in the corner of your eye. You were internally hating yourself for being so stupid, you should never have said anything, never have acted this way. But now after contemplating what to say for a minute the only thing that felt right was to tell him out front what you meant, what you felt.

You lifted your head and immediately felt him staring at you, you sighed and swallowed hard. "Ashton...I.", you spoke quietly and spaced out, still trying to figure out the right words. "I didn't know if I admitted something that I have kept a secret for months now. I was afraid that I blew my chance by being too direct or by starting something in a way that I didn't want this to start.", you had to take deep breaths in between to keep your composure. "Don't look at me like that! I will come to the point", you rolled your eyes at him but his confused expression didn't change. "What I want to say is that I wasn't sure if I told you that I fucking", you stood up and paced in front of him, " love you! And I didn't know if I made a move that I would never have the guts to do normally. But I guess it's out now." You kept pacing through the hotel room and you got more nervous the longer he didn't say anything. Seconds felt like hours and everytime he looked at you and back your stomach flipped again, making you nauseous.

It felt like hours had passes when he finally said something, "Will you stop pacing? You're gonna make me lose my mind!" You couldn't decipher wether it was anger, annoyance or something else in his voice. You stopped dead in your tracks and stood between him and the door. "Well will you fucking say something? Anything!", your voice sounded like a plea. For the first time during that whole conversation you held eye contact with him. You felt like he was staring straight into your soul and when he didn't say anything again your eyes welled up with tears. "Guess it's only me then", you turned on your heel opening the door and escaped onto the hallway.

You closed the door behind you and started to walk away from your hotel room. When you came to the end of the hallway you had to decide where to go, right and visit one of the others or left and leave the whole building. Your heart wanted you to go right, to get comforted by one of the others ; your head wanted you to go left, knowing you were the stupid one in this situation, you caused yourself this pain. You headed left, finally leaving the building after walking down what felt like an endless flight of stairs. The fresh air hit you and your nausea was at a new high.

Walking down the street, not knowing where you were or where to go, you felt like you had to keep walking. Your phone was buzzing a few times but you tried to ignore it. You ended up in a park probably around half an hour of walking alway from the hotel. The bench you were sitting on was still wet from the rain that morning but you didn't really care. Your head was heavy in your hands and even though you felt like crying no tears were coming out, as if to punish you, you couldn't even cry right.

It must have been at least another half an hour that you had been sitting on that bench when your phone buzzed again, this time you took it out of your pocket to check it. You had a few missed calls by Luke and Michael, a few text by Calum but obviously nothing by Ashton. Why would he?

You ignored them, you didn't even know what to think yourself and so their opinion would probably only make the situation worse.

The park was quite empty when you walked around it, only a few parents were playing with their children on the playground and you saw a couple of dogs being walked.

There was a quiet coffee shop at one of the exits and the smell pulled you towards it. The coffee was burning your hand but for some reason it almost felt comforting.

When you had thrown away the empty coffee cup you pulled your phone out by reflex. You were about to push it back into your pocket when it began to ring once again, Michael was calling. Ignoring him would only mean they would call even more and so you decided to finally answer his call. "Michael?", a sigh escaped you but you weren't sure if it had been loud enough for him to hear. "Fuck Y/N finally! Are you alright? We're all worried about you, where are you?", he talked fast and stumbled over some of his words. "I'm fine I guess", you put a special emphasis on the word 'fine' to tell him subliminally you really weren't. "I'm just getting some air, clearing my head a little", you knew it was a lie and he probably did too but you couldn't help it. You tried to sound as convincing as possible but there was no way that he didn't hear the undertone that your voice had taken on. "But where are you exactly?", the concerned tone in his voice startled you for a second. "Not important, why what is up? And if it is about going to the venue tonight, I really don't feel like it sorry", you tried your best at sounding oblivious about whatever he was hinting at but you were probably as good at that as a penguin was at flying. "Y/N! Ash came into my room completely distraught and muttering that he had apparently fucked up. What the fuck happened?", your heart dropped knowing that Ashton was upset because of your mistake. You should have never said anything.

______

Ashton P.O.V

He had waited in Y/N's room for a while, hoping she would come back eventually but she didn't. It took him a while for it to sink in what she had said, 'that I fucking love you'. It played in his mind over and over again. There was so much going through his head that he couldn't concentrate on one thought alone. Part of him wanted to run after her and to tell her to come back, that they would talk about. On the other side he really didn't know how to feel. A while ago he had crushed on her hard and wanted nothing more than to be with her. After nothing ever came from it he tried to suprress it as much as he could and now weeks and months later he didn't know if he still felt for her what he once did. His mind was racing and when he got to Michael's room it felt like his head was going to explore. "Michael! I think I fucked up", he let himself fall against the blonde boy hoping he would catch him. "I should have said something Mikey. Fuck!", Ashton shook his head, ironically starting to pace around the room just like he had told Y/N earlier to stop. He seemed to finally kind of understand her. It all started to make sense. "Y/N I should have told you, I always should have told you", he was muttering to himself and sat down on the bed. Michael was on his phone by now, calling Y/N by what Ashton could hear. He hoped that she was alright and that she would come back to the hotel, to him. There was so much that he should tell her that he probably wouldn't even know where to begin.

_____

"Please tell him to forget what I said and to I don't know just ignore it or something, I don't want it to be awkward!", you pressed the phone closer to your ear while walking through the park again. "No! I am not going to tell him anything, I don't even wanna know what happened, just come back here and talk it out like real adults", he sounded annoyed and so you agreed to come back to the hotel. You had already fucked up the relationship with one of the boys and so you didn't want to risk another one.

Around half an hour later you had arrived back at the hotel, your hands were clammy and your breathing wasn't as steady as it should be, you simply couldn't hide your nervousness.

Every step you took down the hallway towards Michael's room made your heart race even more and when you finally knocked on the door it felt like it was going to jump out of your chest.

"Y/N?", Ashton threw the door open fast when he saw you standing infront of him. "I... Will you come in?", he was stuttering slightly and you had never seen him this flustered before. You nodded your head and entered the room when he took a step to the side. Your first instinct was to go back to pacing up and down the room again but because of his words from earlier repeating in your mind over and over again you just stood still in one place. He closed the door and then leaned on the wall next to it, looking around the room.

"Ashton. I left because you wouldn't say anything, now Michael begged for me to come back and you are still saying nothing.", you sat down on the end of the bed. Ashton's eyes met yours but he still didn't look like he was about to speak up. "This is awkward enough for me, if I am leaving now, and I will if you stay silent, it won't just be for an hour", you shook your head and you sounded a little more aggravated than you wanted to.

"Y/N! It's just I don't know if I love you!", he pushed himself off of the wall and his sudden movement made your head shoot up. You thought a 'Yeah I gathered that much', but did not say it out loud. "I don't want to talk around it anymore. I have loved you before but I never had the guts to tell you and rather suppressed it. And now I don't know if I still feel for you what I once did. I want to, don't get me wrong, I really want to feel all of the again but I don't know if I can.", he kept eye contact the whole way through and even though you felt like escaping his piercing look you couldn't break the eye contact. It felt like he was staring into your soul and maybe even deeper. "Ash.", your voice was shaky and quiet when you spoke up. "I didn't and I don't want to pressure you into anything. I am sorry. I shouldn't have said anything", you slowly got up from the bed, keeping eye contact until you were standing in front of him.

He shook his head, "Don't be sorry! I'm the idiot, I should have said something months ago or at least today. And I feel like shit when I see you like this, because of me.", he stepped a little closer and took your hands into his. "I want to make you happy again, I want to feel it again.", his voice was low and there was this loving tone that you hadn't heard in a while.

"I just don't know if I can", your heart dropped and your stomach formed a knot again, it felt like he was playing with your feelings. You took a deep breath and tried to remove your hands from his grip but he was holding them tightly, "Well I don't know if you can either but I won't wait another few months for you to decide what you want. Either you can love me soon or it just won't work", in the middle of your sentence he had pulled you in closer so that you were leaning against his chest now. You could feel his fast heart beat and his hitched breathing. He let go of your hands and you were prepared to be pushed away again. Instead of that he placed his hands on your jaw and lifted your face up to his.

Before you could say anything he had pressed his lips against yours, his heartbeat got even faster, matching yours. You weren't sure if you should try and stop the kiss or lean deeper into it, you did not want to pressure him into feeling like he had to like you. When he pulled away he had his eyes closed and was humming lightly. "Ashton", you tried to sound as calm as possible, "You don't have to do that. Don't fake it, that will only makes it worse." Tears were filling your eyes and were close to spilling over when he pulled you back into a hug. "Ash please", you plead and hoped that he would let go of you.

He ignored you and took one of your hands again, lifting it up and pressing it against his chest. "Do you feel that?", he pushed the hair out of your face with his other hand and the way he looked at you made you feel dizzy. Under your hand you could feel his heart beating rapidly. You nodded and looked up to him. "You did that to me, in the best way possible.", he leaned his forehead against yours and you were a little confused by what he was saying. "I don't think I understand", it wasn't more than a whisper that escaped your lips before he pressed his against yours again. Your mind was racing making you feel overwhelmed, tears fell down your cheek and you couldn't help but sob in the middle of the kiss. Ashton pulled his head back and looked at you concerned, his thumb brushed away some of the tears but even more fell when he did that. "Y/N! I'm sorry, I just I thought you and I and I am sorry", he was stammering and tried to move away from you. You wrapped your arms around him not letting him leave yet.

"I want this but only if you actually want this too", you tried to suppress a sob but it still escaped. "I might be a mess but I want this. I want you", he wrapped his arms around you and squeezed you tightly to his body.

You had to mutter in his chest and weren't sure if he had heard you but you didn't care at this point, "We can be a mess together. "

_____

I feel like I need to apologise for this idk the idea for it changed like twenty times and I hope that none of you take offence by the beginning idfk

#5sos #Ashton irwin #5sos imagine #5sos x reader #ashton irwin imagine #Ashton irwin x reader #5 seconds of summer x reader #5 seconds of summer imagine #5 seconds of summer #A. I #A.I #Luke hemmings #Michael Clifford #Calum hood #Writing #Imagines #Bandblogging #fanfiction

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sansloii-a · 5 years

Note

coughs so am I allowed to request all of the “salty af munday meme” answers or—

oh my fucking god || @imbruedinfear

strap in y’all ‘cause someone wants to hear me complain

What does someone have to do for an instant unfollow from you?

if you post excessive ooc in quick sucession, i will unfollow you faster than the speed of light. i’ve done it in the past. i will not hesitate to do it in the future. i don’t care if it’s tagged. if i’m on and i see it, you’re gone, my friend.

What’s the WORST thing that has happened to you rp wise?

uuuuuuuuuuhhhhh there was this one dude that legit tried to monopolize one of my old muses on another blog, got upset when i set a main ship for said muse, complained to me nonstop, was trying to use me to get back into rping with my friend group ( which he called “the popular group” for a reason I don’t understand to this day ), only wanted to ship, got pissy over a fucking pokemon au ( if you ever wanna hear about this, lemme know ), tried to insert a ship into every au we made automatically, tried to tell me how to write smut for no reason ( said he would read it and give me tips and everything ffs ), was an asshole to my sister ( who rped way back when but doesn’t anymore ), made several friends of mine uncomfortable to the point of leaving the rp scene for a bit, blamed other people for issues that he honestly had a part in causing, and a bunch of other things that i’m forgetting right now.

i figure that’s the worst because nothing has topped that. nothing. that happened years ago, though, so i’m good now. no one fucks with me like that anymore.

What was a mildly annoying thing that has happened to you rp wise?

i got about 10 asks from someone when i wanted to do other shit ( my asks that are in the double digits ) ‘cause they wanted me to send them an ask. annoyed me to hell and back and i promptly deleted those asks

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ tough shit. i was not in the mood for games and i’m still not.

Has anyone ever tried to steal your blog? Your headcanons? Icons? All that jazz?

not that i know of??? i hope not ‘cause i worked real hard on all this and if you steal anything from me, i’m gonna throw a huge-ass heaping of karma your way.

How many people don’t like you?

i dunno. i’d say none but i know not everyone is going to like me so if you’re out there and you don’t like me, you’re entitled to that. don’t tell me, though, ‘cause i don’t wanna know if you don’t like me.

How many people do you not like?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i don’t really care enough to actively not like anyone. you can annoy me but unless you piss me off and continue to piss me off, you get stuck on the “do not care” list.

Have you managed to stay away from drama?

i give advice when needed on how to avoid whoever my convo partner is talking about and i avoid getting involved. unless it’s like… a close friend or involves a close friend, i refuse to get in the middle of whatever issue people have. i’m not about to have my ass dragged into problems that do not concern me.

i don’t cause drama either so that’s also how i stay away from it. 100% guaranteed to keep you out of drama.

Have you ever been in the middle of drama?

personal/friend drama? yes. rp drama? see above.

none of that was fun btw. it was a lot of me getting angry, being frustrated with certain behaviors, having to cut people out for doing shit/saying shit that they knew they shouldn’t have and refusing to recognize that they have fucked up and use that to change their behavior, etc. it’s draining and not fun and i’m pretty sure it shaved years off my life but y’know, it is what it is. the most i can do about it is look out for myself and keep out of relationships that will put me in those situations again.

Have you ever tried to bring peace to a situation?

no because i used to be friends with people that weren’t straightforward with shit and made excuses instead of changing their behavior. i don’t wanna go into it ‘cause and i can’t remember all the details but boy, peace was hard to come by and it didn’t last long. i wasn’t going to try to bring peace if people didn’t really seem to want it and level with each other.

How long do you stay mad?

depends on what you do, tbh, but it’s a couple hours at least. a couple days at most.

What’s your rp pet peeve? ( i have a lot of these )

playing “find the links” on someone’s blog. if i can’t find your links, i’ll try “/rules”, “/r.”, “/g.” and whatever else i can think of to get your rules and a couple more things to get your muse’s about. however, i shouldn’t have to and it takes little effort to make it so that your links are easily distinguishable from the background. if i don’t find them, i don’t find them. and i don’t follow/follow back

Have you ever forgiven a partner when you shouldn’t have?

nope. not now, not ever.

Have you ever been forgiven when you knew you shouldn’t have been?

i’ve never been in a situation where i’ve had to be forgiven for stuff i’ve done so no.

What fads/trends are you so over?

the first thing i thought of was the fucking double ampersands thing that was everywhere at some point. those annoyed me so much and i’m so glad they’re gone. super small text needs to die too. i may not wear glasses but i sure as shit ain’t straining my eyes to see what you’ve written in 3px font.

honestly, a lot of the excessive aesthetic shit that sacrifices accessibility for #aesthetic

Have you ever rp’d with someone you knew for a fact was abusive but tried to give them a chance/to make up your own opinion on the roleplayer? Did they change or did you understand what people were talking about?

nope, nope. nu-uh. if i knew for a fact that this person was abusive in that moment, i wouldn’t touch them with a ten foot pole. absolutely fucking not.

Have you ever made a public call out post?

-loud snort- hell no.

What has made you completely lose your chill?

honestly? look at my worst experience and that about sums up shit that has made me lose my chill. you really gotta push my fucking buttons to make me mad ‘cause i’m usually pretty laid back.

What do you think about public call out posts?

answered here

A fandom that you feel isn't open and accepting?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i dunno. i’ve only been in one before and that was f.ire e.mblem

A fandom that you feel is open and accepting?

imma be real honest with y’all--the only fandom i’ve been in that i will acknowledge is f.ire e.mblem and i had a pretty sweet time there. i had some ups and downs but it was an overall good experience for me. it was pretty open and inviting in my opinion but i tended to stay away from the douchebags in the fandom ‘cause i just wanted to have a good time there.

Thoughts on duplicates following you?

if i have duplicates of my oc following me, i’ll have a whole fucking cow

Do you agree with reblog karma or is it forced interaction?

i don’t think it’s forced interaction most of the time ( with sentence starters, symbol memes, memes that take literally zero fucking effort to send in ) ‘cause... everyone likes getting stuff, y’know. if you wanna reblog it from someone, just take a moment to send something in if the interaction is feasible. that’s the key thing here. if it’s feasible, then i don’t see the issue with sending something in before you reblog it from someone ( especially if you’re mutuals ). if it isn’t and you just wanna reblog it, reblog it from the source. it’s not that serious.

if someone nitpicks you for rebloging the same meme they did but you reblogged it from the source, i wouldn’t feel too bad. you know what’s best for your muses and if you don’t feel like the meme is cohesive for interactions, then that’s your prerogative and the

Has someone ever ruined an FC or character for you?

answered here

Has someone been jealous of you?

i’ve only been told that someone was jealous of me once and it was a long time ago. i have never heard that from anyone again ( not that i remember, at least )

Have you ever been jealous of anyone?

mhm! but it usually comes when i’m feeling super down about my blog and doubting my ocs ( which isn’t often ). when i do get jealous, it’s over interactions and the like and my big dumb galactic brain is like “wow, don’t you wish you had those interactions? don’t you wish you were rping with those people?” and makes me feel bad about the interactions i have, the speed at which i reply, my ocs, how many people are interesting in my ocs, etc. however, this shit doesn’t last long ‘cause i have a bunch of wonderful people that motivate me to get out of that funk and just... focus on what i have instead of what i’m seeing on my dash. i remind myself that i’m here to have fun and i shouldn’t try to match my experience to others’

How has Tumblr RP changed since you started?

more formatting, smaller icons, more focus on having a fancy ass theme, more formatting, more callout posts, less communication in some regard, more reminders for communication.more psa posts, more formatting--

honestly, i’ve been on tumblr since 2012 and most of it is a blur lmao. i probably don’t remember everything ‘cause i was.... 15 when i started rping on here. i’m 22 now. i’m sure a lot has changed in seven years but i definitely haven’t seen it all.

Thoughts on the fandom you're currently rping in?

i’m currently a fandomless blog and boy, is it a lot more fun XD i have a lot more creative liberty and i can shape the world my muses live in to my liking, as opposed to following or just adding onto what the fandom universe already is. it’s a lot of work and it takes a ton of time but it’s fun and i’m enjoying every second of it!

How salty are you feeling right now?

answered here but i’ll just say it again: not salty. just tired and rambly because holy shit this took a while

#imbruedinfear #🗪 ┊ ⧼ yᴏᴜ ᴀʟʟ ᴀʀᴇ ꜱᴏᴍᴇ ᴄʜᴀᴛᴛy ᴄᴀᴛʜyꜱ! ⧽ ⇹ ( asks. )#ツ ┊ ⧼ ᴄᴀᴛᴡᴀʟᴋ ᴛᴀʟᴋ ⧽ ⇹ ( ooc. )#.i answered ALL those questions #.i hope my salt was enough for you

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suteshiro · 5 years

Note

ALL for crown.

I LOVE YOU

If your character wasn’t an adventurer, what livelihood would they lead?

Wouldn’t you want to know

Who in the party would your character trust the most with their life?

For now I can’t say for sure? From the ones he currently knows it’s hard to tell bc he trusts Love in a Personal Way but is lowkey convinced he’d sell him to Satan for a corn chip. And Gank seems p trustworthy in that regard but they have only briefly met each other

What are your character’s core moral beliefs?

No one gets to control or take away someone else’s autonomy

What relationship does your character have with their parents and siblings?

Parents? Hate ‘em. Siblings? H

Does your character have any biases for or against certain races?

Eeh, I don’t think so

What is your character’s opinion on nobility? On authority?

Take a wild guess ksvjfnskjv

He doesn’t think someone having authority is inherently bad but he hates every person in authority he’s ever known of so his opinion has been formed based on that

Describe your character’s current appearance: clothes, armor, scars they’ve picked up along the journey, etc.

I’m lazy. You know what she looks like

What location encountered in the campaign has your character felt the most “at home” in, or just generally liked the most?

Campaign hasn’t started yet so I can’t say anything about which locations visited she’s liked! She feels very comfortable at the spot we’re starting at tho

What deity, if any, does your character worship? What’s their opinion on other people’s worship?

Caenrys babey. She’s a bit weirded out by people who dedicate themselves to organized religion but in general she doesn’t stick her nose in others’ religious business

If your character had time to pick up any artisan’s tools, game set, instrument, etc., what would it be?

Artisan’s tools: I think he’d like glassblowing! Woodworking is cool too

Game set: playing cards probably

I don’t think he’s rlly interested in music as something he himself might perform vkjfnfksjn

Learning how to use a poisoner’s kit could be fun

Describe your character’s current relationship with the player character sitting to your right.

I’m not sitting next to anyone so I rolled for it and got Gank (@prophe-seer‘s character)

Crown likes Gank a lot! They only met like, once but they rlly got along. She feels a bit bad for them bc they seemed to think she was rlly nice and instead of considering she Might genuinely be nice she jumped to “oh shit the bar is fucking underground for this guy” skvjfnksjfvn. So she’s surprisingly attached. She wants them to have an actual friend bc it seems like they need it

What is your character’s current goal, summed up in one sentence?

I’m headed straight for the castle

Does your character ever want to “settle down” with a spouse, children, house, etc.?

Currently, no. She has a lot of dangerous shit to do and is too caught up on being A Free Spirit That Actually Gets To See The World to like,, consider settling down. And she hasn’t given any thought to what life she’ll have after her goals have been fulfilled.

But I’ve actually given some thought to this and I think she wants to make a family one day. Idk if it’ll include children (probably adopting older “problem” children tbh) or a spouse but she definitely wants to settle down with at least one pet

Has your character ever been in love?

What battle in the campaign has been most memorable to your character?

Haven’t played yet!

If your character wasn’t whatever class they are, what would they be instead?

Probably a fighter skjvfnskjfvn or a paladin

What is your character’s favorite season?

Autumn! Lovs the cronch. Loves to get to cool down after summer

What would your character’s Zodiac sign be, following stereotypical astrology?

I actually already made this decision ksjfnkvsjn she’s an Aries. I remember liveblogging my decision making to a friend regarding this but i cant remember what it was and im lazy

Where in the world does your character most want to visit?

Oh you know

What is the biggest mistake your character has ever made?

Oh you know,

Does your character have any noticeable scars? If so, what are their stories?

Probably not!

What animal best represents your character?

Wolf,

If your character could go back in time and change one thing about their life, what would it be?

Oh you know,,,,

Which other player character does your character find themselves having the most in common with?

Not sure yet!

Does your character regret any particular choice the party has made?

idk yet ksvfsjfv

What would your character say their best trait would be?

uuuh i dont think he thinks of himself in positive terms a lot skvnksjfvn

he’d probably name his strength or smth like that

What is your character’s greatest fear? Deep, irrational?

Oh, you know!

What is currently motivating your character to stay with the party?

I don’t know cause we don’t have the plot hook yet

What are your character’s hobbies and interests outside of their class?

he likes collecting small trinkets and going to festivals and thats. about it

What would most people think when they first see your character?

“Oh shit sexy”

What stereotypical group role does your character play in the party? (The Mom, the Mess, the Comic Relief, etc. Optionally: What role would your character play in the “Five Man Band” structure?)

Surprisingly, I think it’s The Mom skjvfnksnvksjnvf he seems to be really going in the “What The Fuck. Are You Okay. I Must Protect You”

But also he’s absolutely the mess

In a five man band he’s the leader, lancer and big guy all at once. Probably the lancer tho

What is your character the most insecure about?

He’s completely unable to see himself as a kind person worthy of tenderness

What person does your character admire most?

Gaylia!!! He thinks she’s so strong and cool

What does your character admire and dislike the most about the player character sitting to your left?

Going for Love since I talked about Gank already. He bedrudgingly admires how cunning and People Smart Love can be. Absolutely hates how much of a Bastard he is and how hot he is

Why is your character’s lowest stat their lowest (the in-character reason, not “because there’s no reason for a wizard to have 16 strength, duh”)?

Both int and wis are at a -2!

Wisdom: he wasn’t uh. raised in a way where he rlly got to learn the ways of people’s minds, or do anything but repress his own feelings. and once he was out on his own he was so focused on being a reckless fool he never even tried to change that

Intelligence: He has big adhd and always had a hard time learning. Instead of being supported he was yelled at and punished for stupidity. He retaliated by refusing to keep trying. So now he’s dumb

What would be your character’s theme song/favorite band/favorite genre of music?

I have an entire playlist for him please look at it I worked so hard on it-

I think most relevant are Castle by Halsey and Emperor’s new clothes by p!atd. I think he would also associate those songs with himself and really like them. Royals by Lorde is also up there for sure. And Rise from League of Legends

What stereotypical role would your character play in a high school AU/if they attended a normal high school? (Nerd, jock, bully, goth, etc.)

Goth jock.

What treasure/item/artifact that your character has collected during the adventure is the most important to them?

Not particularly precious to him and not in the adventure since we haven’t played yet but he has Love’s broken antler skvjfnksjfv

Is there any particular weapon, item, etc. that your character longs to find?

Oh you know

Where does your character feel the most at home?

Gaylia’s place probably,

Does your character care about how they’re perceived by others? How do they change themselves to fit in with other people?

She’s built her entire identity around refusing to give a fuck, however in truth she probably actively tries to be seen as rebellious and maybe intimidating

What does your character think is the true meaning of life?

Bold of you to imply she thinks that much

What is your character’s scent? (Bonus points for a description that sounds like it could be from a bad [or awesome] fanfic.)

Roses, lilies and musk ( have no clue if those go well together)

Does your character think more with their heart or their brain?

Heart, absolutely

What is your character’s most recent or frequent nightmare?

haha,,,, ha,,,,,,, h

What opinion does your character have on [CERTAIN ESTABLISHED GROUPS/AUTHORITIES IN THE GAME WORLD]? (Dragonmarked Houses, royal crown, etc.)

Wouldn’t you like to know

How did your character spend their childhood? Where did they grow up/who were their childhood friends?

What aspect of your character’s future are they most curious about? (If they could know one thing about the future, what would it be?)

I will keep that to myself!

What colors are associated with your character?

Who in the party would your character prioritize rescuing, in dire circumstances?

Love,,

Is your character the most swayed by ethos, pathos, or logos?

Pathos

If your character was granted a single use of Wish, what would they use it for?

I will keep that to myself!

What is your character’s favorite spell? If they don’t use spells: what is their favorite personal weapon/combat maneuver/skill/etc.?

She has spells and enjoys using them (probably mostly eldritch blast) but nothing beats her good trusty zweihander

How does your character feel about keeping secrets from the rest of the party?

She has no qualms with it ksvjfnskfjv

What type of creature in the world is your character the most intrigued by?

Love I dunno, snakes? Snakes are weird

When they were a child, what did your character want to be, or think they were going to be, when they grew up?

I don’t think Crown thought she was gonna make it to her 20s

The player character to your left admits that they’re passionately in love with your character. How would your character respond?

I rolled and got Gank skfvnksjvfn

I think he’d be flustered and flattered and be like “oh! we can. certainly try dating! but I can’t say I return your feelings right now. uh. sorry,,,”

If somebody (an NPC, someone from their backstory, etc.) your character trusts/loves asked your character to do something against the party’s best interest, who would they side with?

Ah,,,

That’s a very complicated question that depends on many factors I’m afraid

Does your character value their own best interest more than the party’s?

He wants to think he does, at least skvjnskvjf

What decision would the party have to make in order for your character to consider splitting off from the group?

Who knows!

How does your character imagine the way they will die?

Doing something stupid, completely alone

What is your character’s greatest achievement?

Making it to 25 honestly svkjnksfjnv

Is your character willing to risk the well-being of others in order to achieve their goal?

Depends on who those others are

What is your character’s opinion on killing others?

Sure why not let’s do it man

What is your character’s favorite food? Beverage?

Pizza and orange juice?

How generous is your character? Especially to those they don’t know?

Surprisingly generous! Maybe not so much with money but she’s always willing to lend a helping hand

What is your character the most envious about, regarding anyone in the party?

I don’t understand this question svknskjfv

The player character to your left and the player character to your right are both telling your character two different versions of the truth. Who does your character believe?

Again I keep choosing between Gank and Love bc they’re the only ones she knows kjfvnskjfvn I mean. it depends. if it’s on something Important I think she’ll side with Love but in general she’s more likely to believe Gank

What is your character’s sexuality/relationship with sex?

Big bisexual, first of all!

She actually has a complicated relationship with sex! Being in any kind of Intimate Situation used to be very triggering for her. But she worked through it and now she’s. Horny

What is your character’s biggest pet peeve?

When people leave without paying their part.

Describe how your character feels about the party’s current situation/objective/etc.

Shit man I dunno we have no plan

Who in the party would your character trust the most to keep an important secret?

Love is the only one she’s known long enough to build any meaningful trust with svknskfv

If your character knew that they were going to die in a month, how would they spend the rest of their life?

Probably with his only genuine friend, trying to live life to the fullest kvjfnskfv,

What makes your character feel safe?

Being fully aware of his surroundings with easy access to his sword

If your character had the chance to rename the party/give the party a name, no questions asked, what would it be?

No party yet!

What memory does your character want to forget the most?

If your character had to multiclass into a class they currently aren’t the next time they level up, what would it be and what reason would they have for doing so?

Fukinuh. Paladin? He rlly likes Caenrys and is like “fuck it let’s do another combat charisma-based thing”

What television/book/video game/etc. character would your character be best friends with? (Or: what media character is your character the most influenced by/similar to?

He was heavily influenced by a webcomic character but i will keep Who a secret just in case it makes people figure stuff out skvnskvn

What unusual talents does your character possess?

Really good at doing things without looking, apparently skfjvnsfv

How does your character feel about receiving/giving orders? Are they more of a leader, or a follower?

Giving orders is. Kinda hot

Receiving orders? Die

What does your character’s name represent to them? (Or: why as a player did you choose your character’s name?)

Among other things, Crown’s name represents her proclaiming herself as someone with full authority, if anything, over herself. She’s claiming at every moment a position of power and I think that’s very sexy of her

Is your character more of an introvert, or an extrovert?

Ambivert, probably! Loves people but may get overwhelmed being around them too much

How far is your character willing to go to pursue the “greater good”? Do they believe in a greater good at all?

In theory she doesn’t believe in the greater good but she lies to herself so who knows what she’d do when push comes to shove skjvfnksjfv

What does your character want to be remembered by?

It’s complicated and I’m too lazy to explain it, especially without spoiling anything

What would be your character’s major in college?

He’d shrivel and die in an academic setting pal

Does your character consider themselves a hero, villain, or something else?

It’s complicated,,

Let’s say hero and keep it there

What major arcana tarot card best represents your character?

I’m between The Fool and The Magician. Strength is also fun

Where does your character see themselves in 20 years?

Oh, you know!

What is your character’s relationship with magic? Are they scared of it, wish to know more about it, indifferent to it?

Magic is,,, kinda hot!

Who is your character’s biggest rival?

Love ksjvfnksjfvkjsfv

What is your character’s guiltiest pleasure?

Bold of you to imply he feels guilt over anything pleasurable

What does your character hope for the afterlife?

He doesn’t think about that

Who in the party does your character trust the least?

Just as he trusts Love the most he also trusts him the least. Shady bastard

What is your character’s biggest flaw?

-2 wisdom

How did your character learn the languages that they speak?

Uh. Growing up and being raised?

What is your character’s favorite school of magic/type of weaponry?

GREATSWORD AND EVOCATION BABY

What is most important to your character: health, wealth, or happiness?

Happiness

What advice would your character give to a younger version of themselves?

“There’s power in your anger. Take action before it gets worse”

Are there any social or political issues your character feels strongly about?

It’s hard to explain bc I don’t know Politics Words

What, currently, is your character the most curious about?

;)

#crown tag #thanks for asking! My hands hurt!!!#the-carmevore

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flappy-spookster · 5 years

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The Bizarre Road Trip Of A Missing Family by @icantwritegood (ao3) - (68,014 words) “A hunt for a missing family + one determined detective + one ex-conman + past beef = one hell of a road trip.”

This is one of the best fics I have ever read and if you haven’t read it yet, please do. Everything by this author is seriously amazing but this fic is one of my all time favorites (from any fandom) and I cannot express how good it is. There are so many amazing characters, scenarios, plot twists, and details that all come together to make a compelling story. There is a second part already out and completed (i’ve already started it, it’s amazing as well) and I can’t wait to see where this goes. All of that being said, I am so enamored with this fic that I made a playlist that I will explain further under the cut. If you haven’t read the fic, DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER BECAUSE EVERYTHING FROM HERE ON OUT CONTAINS EXPLICIT SPOILERS.

Music is something that’s very important to me and helps me to better put my ideas together, and this fic really inspired me to try to put together something that represents this fic. In this post I’m going to explain why I chose each song and how it fits into the plot. I love symbolism, so I’m super excited to share everything that I put into this. I would recommend listening to each song as you read the analysis to get the Vibe. I’ve never explained my thoughts like this, so hopefully it goes well.

1. “Gossip” by Sleeping With Sirens

I chose this song for the beginning of the fic because it captures a lot of the tension and chaos that enters when Shane comes back into the picture for the case, but also has some underlying themes that continue throughout the whole thing.

“I wanna live fast, I wanna die free My blood is pumping, why can't you feel my heartbeat?“

This lyric really captures the chaotic energy that Shane brings into this whole situation right off the bat, especially “I wanna die free” because in the end I think that he’s just the type of person who needs to be in charge of a situation and needs to get free.

“To play the game, honey, you have got to roll the dice I could be bad luck, you might be crazy Yeah, I've got 9 lives, you only have 3 You're like my technique, I'm on a winning streak So watch that pretty mouth before you go and try to speak”

Once again, these lines have big Shane energy. It shows his need to be in charge of the situation, how he wants to control Ryan, and honestly just his outlook on the situation. It shows a little of how he has this sort of superiority over Ryan (real or not) and how he is convinced that he will be able to rule the situation. Also shows how Shane “taunts” Ryan.

2. “Chasing Rainbows” by Bring Me The Horizon

I mainly chose this song because it captures the near hysterical “hate” and competition between Ryan and shane at the beginning. It fits especially well with the whole finding a hotel situation as well as what occurs over the next few days (I think days, it may have just been one, time is hard).

“Are we just dreaming in the city that never sleeps? 'Cause I can't be seeing what my eyes tell me Am I just dreaming? This can't be in my veins Everything I ever knew will never be the same”

These lines capture both of their initial reactions to the whole, “wtf they’re actually super hot what” moments they have.

“Yeah, I feel it in my blood I can't fight this anymore I've given up”

I would count this as the moment where Ryan gives up on everything and just walks out the door only to have Shane pull him back in. It covers the defeat (and passion) they both feel in that moment.

3. “Feel Something” By Jaymes Young

Okay so this is one of my favorite artists and I struggled a lot to decide which song of his to use for this. If you want to get some really good kinda chill vibes but with a lot of darker undertones, this is your guy. I chose this song for their night in the hotel because everything about it just fits. I would highly recommend looking through all of the lyrics if you’re interested because they could all apply.

“Touch me someone I'm too young to feel so Numb, numb, numb, numb You could be the one to Make me feel something, something (2x) Show me that you're human, ohh”

I think this is fairly self explanatory, they both just really need to get it out of their systems. It also works because Shane has just gotten out of prison (and I am by no means saying that he wasn’t doing the same thing to people in there as he was outside) and is just now seeing Ryan in this new light and they both really need to work through this.

“I never thought I'd miss the bittersweet I gave those years away”

This could refer not only to the 3 years Ryan spent trying to get Shane but also to the time Shane spent working against Ryan. It also pulls in the way they both have this weird sort of nostalgia for the chase.

4. “Ignorance” by Paramore

This entire album (brand new eyes) captures a lot of the intensity and conflicting emotions that come with this fic and i would have used everything on here if I could. I chose this song because it captures of lot of the anger that they both feel.

“If I'm a bad person, you don't like me Well, I guess I'll make my own way It's a circle, a mean cycle”

Throughout the whole fic Shane constantly brings up the whole “was anything I really did that terrible thing and this just gets that. It also brings in how he’s kind of just using this to get out.

“What's my offense this time?“

Pretty straightforward, but I mean the literal crimes he was charged with and how he’s constantly taunting Ryan.

“I guess I'll go I'd best be on my way out“

This brings in how he’s literally leaving and that whole situation.

5. “Mama” by My Chemical Romance

If you don’t follow my main blog or haven’t guessed it yet, I’m a big fan of that emo shit and love those bands and nobody does it better than My Chemical Romance. This song has good vibes, good lyrics, good style, all of it, for this fic. It captures the feelings of betrayal but also just flat out chaos surrounding Shane leaving and abandoning Ryan in the middle of the road.

“Mama, we all go to hell”

One of the recurring lines throughout the song, this song really just captures the absolute insanity in all the shit going down. It also ties into Shane’s attitude to the whole situation.

“Stop asking me questions, I'd hate to see you cry Mama, we're all gonna die“

Hints at the underlying feelings that still remain despite everything that’s going on.

6. “Miss Jackson” by Panic! at the Disco

This song just gives off some vibes that I feel with the whole fallout.

“You've got them wrapped around your finger Watch them fall down”

This brings in the other characters/Shane’s “friends” from before prison and how Ryan plans to take them out before Shane can get to them.

“Found another victim But no one's going to find Miss Jackson”

Refers to how Shane has taken advantage of so many people, including Ricky (and Ryan, but not quite the same, you know), but nobody has ever really made him feel the effects of that (yet).

7. “Novocaine” by Fall Out Boy

This whole song has a lot of the same intensity/energy/passion as the fic and that’s really why I chose it to put in here, but there’s also song good lyrics.

“I’m just a problem that doesn't want to be solved“

This is literally just Shane throughout the entire fic, but after Shane leaving him Ryan really wants to make him pay.

“So don’t stop, don't stop till your heart goes numb Now I’m just numb I don’t feel a thing for you”

How Ryan is repressing those feelings and just really wants to catch Shane and redeem himself but also just wants him to be held responsible.

8. “God Damn Liar” by Get Scared

This song is pretty loaded and there’s a lot to look at here. Overall, the passion and anger in here pretty much sums up there entire relationship tbh.

“You'll never take me alive Cause god knows you've tried I once was blind but now I see the light Maybe I should cut my wrists You know I've never been fucked like this You've ripped my heart apart You know who you are”

This is a pretty long chunk, but I think the whole thing really just sums up their whole situation. They’re both wrestling with their feelings, and both really caught off guard by how much they enjoy everything that’s going on. It also is there for the turning point where Ryan and Shane are on the phone (all of the content in this fits for that part) only for Ryan to reveal that his team is almost to Shane’s location and the betrayal he felt.

“You're a god damn liar I don't want to care Like I want to care“

This sums up how they’re both caught between overwhelming hate and some much softer emotions here. But throughout it all Ryan still really fucking hates Shane.

9. “Careful” by Paramore

This song has so much in it that I like in relation. Overall, it captures a lot of the feelings but also the situation. One of my favorites for this in the end. After putting together a rough draft of everything I wanted in here I realized that I had more Paramore songs (all from the same album) than I really wanted but they all just work so well.

“A twisted up frown Disguised as a smile, well You would have never known I had it all But not what I wanted“

Works both ways, but I see this lyric more in relation to Shane and how he had been free but now has realized that maybe he’s in a little deeper than he thought. It also works really well for Ryan as he realizes that even though he’d worked so hard to put Shane in jail, maybe he’d be much happier with him

“The truth never set me free So, I did it myself“

Shane literally set himself free, it’s pretty straightforward. Also works with the whole “say you thought my sentence was unfair” debacle.

10. “The Last One” by Black Veil Brides

This song fits a lot for the whole competition to see who will apologize first. Honestly, this song is pretty self explanatory as well.

“All the love all the hate, feel like one in the same“

I think this is pretty much their entire relationship honestly, but could also be used as a reference to the time before this case.

“I swear this time is gonna be the last one Gonna be the last one, oh woah ho“

Refers to how they’re both so sure that they can just get out of this if they just do it one more time. Captures a lot of the tension between the two of them.

11. “It’s Not A Fashion Statement, It’s A Deathwish” by My Chemical Romance

Things are heating up with Ricky and Shit Is Going Down. Full of anger and emotions, I’m not sure this is the best song for this part but if you want to get that intense anger, sadness, and passion just go listen to the whole three cheers for sweet revenge album.

“This hole you put me in wasn't deep enough And I'm climbing out, right now You're running out of places to hide from me“

A little reference to how Shane used Ricky and the anger and betrayal Ricky still harbours over their whole situation and how he wants Shane to pay for that.

“When you go Just know that I will remember you“

A little reference to those good ol’ feelings hanging in there. With what comes next, these words fit. However, it also brings in the way Ricky felt after he realized that Shane was already gone for Ryan.

12. “The Two Tongues (Screaming Salvation)” by As It Is

I agonized over what song to put here, and in the end settled on this one, but there’s any number that could go here and I’m still not sure if this one is perfect. Capturing the sheer pain Shane felt over leaving Ryan there is not easy and I’m not sure if this song does it justice, but at least a few lyrics do.

“Until the very end us dying hand-in-hand Death is whispering his answers to my fears But with consequence I'd have to leave you here”

Captures how conflicted Shane is over what to do. He thought that maybe, just maybe, him and Ryan would be able to work things out somehow but now he’s forced to either leave him behind or face the consequences.

“When I think of him there's comfort in the cold He gives me solace when I offer him control Her voice so beautiful will find me and explain That life is agony but worth it all the same“

Oh boy those soft feelings are back and Shane is suddenly torn between everything he’s worked for and the police officer who’s been trying to throw him in jail. A little reference for his need to control the situations, but also how he wants a little more than he’s been able to fully except in the realm of feelings. Also the fact that Ryan is literally in agony and Shane is kind of struggling here with dealing with that but he has to go to live.

“I'm not sure I'm right But I'm not sure I'm wrong I’m just desperate to belong“

Everything just got way harder when feelings got involved and Shane is having a Very Bad Time of it.

13. “The Only Exception” by Paramore

It’s sad boy hours over here for both of them. When Shane left, things kind of went to hell emotion wise. This whole song is a great one if you want to just cry over all of the lost potential and romance because boy is it Rough when you start applying the lyrics.

“And that was the day that I promised I'd never sing of love if it does not exist But, darling You are the only exception”

Things are Not Going Well and Shane cannot deal, but Ryan can’t deal either. This song is for both of them. For Shane, that breakdown on the plane is when most of this comes into play. For Ryan, things come later.

“Maybe I know, somewhere Deep in my soul, that love never lasts”

A reference to all of the brief “relationships” Shane has had in the past leading up to him thinking that maybe this was just how things were going to be.

“And up until now, I had sworn to myself That I'm content with loneliness Because none of it was ever worth the risk“

This one’s for Shane because he’s put himself in a position where he thought that things were just going to be what they were but now that he’s finally found someone he really fucking likes he’s a cop and everything is very complicated and suddenly the risk seems so much more worth it but it’s too late.

“I've got a tight grip on reality But I can't, let go of what's in front of me here“

Another thing that’s mostly for Shane. He has to let go of Ryan and it’s fucking tearing him apart.

this is so long i am so sorry I hope this shows what I was going for when I made the playlist. I’m not always the best with putting my thoughts into words, but I hope you guys can at least see what I was going for.

also, some songs that don’t quite fit into the playlist but i associate with the fic:

“Dark On Me” by Starset

“Props and Mayhem” by Pierce the Veil

“The Reaper” by As It Is

“Hourglass” by Motionless In White

“Fragments” by Jaymes Young

“Tied Down” by Jaymes Young

#this is so long i am seriously so sorry #music #playlist #mine #icantwritegood #road trip #the bizzare road trip of a missing family #fanfic #recommended reads

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