#I need to buy the physical volumes I NEED to own the collection as actual books uuugghh | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pashminalamb · 2 years

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Also I loved reading The Alchemist but I seriously need to get my own copy for a reread. Have you heard of No Longer Human by Dazai Osamu? It’s Japanese classic literature and I was very emotional by the end of it because at that point in my life I could really relate with so many things the author wrote abt. I need to reread it eventually with a new set of eyes and now that I’m in a much better place in life. I actually first got into it because of Bungo Steay Dogs LEAVE ME ALONE I FOUND SOME VERY GOOD BOOKS THROUGH THAT ANIME ASHKHFFGCC. I’m currently in the long process of making my way through H.P. Lovecrafts stories and I need to start Crime and Punishment at some point but we’re not ready for that level of commitment and annotating yet 💀. Do you annotate books? I only recently got into it and sometimes I hate it but other times I love it. Like I hate it when it starts to feel like another homework assignment but I love it when it helps me collect my thoughts and I can take my time to actually digest what I’m reading. So it’s a 50/50 experience. From my birthday book spree, I got the omnibus (joint) volumes 10-11-12 of One Piece (I’m collecting all the omnibus volume sets where it’s like 3 volumes in one manga cause collecting the box sets is really expensive and I’m a very impatient person sometimes lol), the omnibus volume 1-2 and 3-4 of Tokyo Revengers (when I found out that they had finally released physical English versions of the manga I walked into Barnes and Noble with the mission to get that volume first and foremost and I was so excited and surprised and happy that they had also released the second omnibus volume too so I got both at the same time rereading Tokyo Revengers from the beginning is so nostalgic and makes me cry so much but in a good way because at this point in the story everything’s still almost great and happy), I also got volume 2 of Blue Lock and ordered volumes 1 and 3 (I figured I might as well start collecting the manga now so I can start binge reading immediately after the first season ends). I also got actual book books too. One was a new buy (not from my tbr list) and it’s called Belladonna by Adalyn Grace (one of the store people recommended it to me last time I was there and it sounded fun and interesting so I got it, it’s also hardcover since it’s new, and oh man I haven’t purchased a hardcover in such a long time lol), Kingdom of the Wicked by Kerri Maniscalco (it’s was all over my fyp for a while but that’s not the reason I got it, I got it because a lot of my favorite booktokkers recommended it and it’s not mainstream, made that mistake with The Poppy War already, so I got it), and the paperback copy of The Hawthorne Legacy by Jennifer Lynn Barnes (idk why this book got so much hate but I liked the first one so we shall see). Oh and I’m also rereading PJO in honor of the show coming out soon. Do you like Percy Jackson? The trailer for the show was asvjgdffff amazing it was like seeing my childhood come to life I have high hopes for the show. And I’m also reading Chainsaw Man rn because I had gotten volumes 1-5 already before the anime started cause I heard it was great and I wanted to be ahead if the show you know but I finished volume 3 before life happened so I wanna start reading it again. Anyways how are you? Doing good I hope? Have you eaten and drank water today? *sends virtual hugs*

- ✨ anon

The moment I read 'no longer human by Dazai Osamu' I knew it had to be BSD 💀 and reading further I turned out to be right; I’ll have to give it a try though. With Japanese books, I have the memoirs of a geisha and another autobiography of a geisha and ikigai. Murakami’s works have been complimented a lot so I’m contemplating if I should read that or not… maybe once I’m done with this book.

I tried reading Brida and Valkyrie by Paulo coelho but I was too young and didn’t understand it 😮‍💨

I do annotate books! It’s kinda a necessity atp being a uni student; but otherwise I annotate books as well cause life lessons to use later amirite?

I have a bleach Omnibus, a black edition of death note but otherwise I read manga online cause it’s easier in a way but for book books, I prefer the physical copy when I use travel or something along with music playing. Music makes the experience of reading good and even when I’m working or writing something. Most of the recs I get are from friends and family or something I pick up when I’m out shopping for books. I’ve heard of Lovecraft’s books but I’ve never had the chance of reading them… I read mostly non fiction works but I do enjoy a good horror.

Funny thing, I started getting into Percy Jackson in eighth grade cause my peers were reading it but in five pages of lightening thief I just stopped reading for some reason? But. I managed to finish twilight in two days and proceeded to buy the entire collection. Then I sold it off cause I realized I was being cringe and it was a phase (I’m so embarrassed of even telling this story 😭) and then I read Harry Potter as well… managed to finish the goblet of fire and I had other books in the series as well like the order of the phoenix but I decided to give those away and finally found my place in mangas and anime and works of non fiction… the only fiction I read recently was Verity by colleen Hoover ; and that inspired me to write ruined Rome (which is currently on hold and will continue once I edit the new changes into it)

As for chainsawman , that manga provided me comfort in a way cause i had to travel at that time since a member of my family had passed away. And while I was at the funeral, I wasn’t in a good shape cause we were pretty close so I decided to read chainsawman and the story of Pochita and Denji gave me an odd sense of comfort I would say? Cause it’s like ‘I’ll always be a part of you.’

Switching onto the lighter side of things, people are going crazy over Makima and I’m just waiting for mappa to animate that part 😶‍🌫️

I’m doing good bb <3 worked out this morning, got through two bottles of water, had brekky and my roommate is planning to cut my hair this week and I’m also working on an art of me and Aiku (yes I am that obsessed, but hey selfship is the best ship) uni goes on; and I’m doing work in advance so that I can relax later (I’m so sleepy but caffeine isn’t good for my system as much so I stick to just milk), writing a lot more and studying as well. How about you? I hope you’re doing well and taking care of yourself?

*sending hugs*

#saint.σ #.lost sheep : ✨ anon

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marvellousstawler · 7 months

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Halloween 2023 but the post was due yesterday

As a result it's not themed, sorry, no Halloweeny business from me, my life is almost constantly spooky themed so there's no point. I'll have you know that I did wear a werewolf costume to my important government job though. I was softly encouraged to remove the lipstick-and-eyeliner cheek scratches, but allowed to keep the fluffy mitten-hat.

Art I'm going to tentatively declare that what I've been doing this week counts as art. Actually I'm going to rescind my tentativeness because it absolutely does.

First one is fairly straightforward. Because I'm too cheap to buy one, I made a pinboard out of spare cardboard wrapped in cable tape to facilitate my now-much-larger pin collection following PAX. Now my whole room stinks of the tape but it's worth it because the pinboard works very well and I didn't spend a cent. Well. On the board. Maybe don't ask about the pins.

For the next one, some backstory: Pokémon has permeated my mind for about four-fifths of my life, I own and have completed at least one game from every generation since 3 including rom hacks, and I have not once actually completed the pokedex. So that is what I have endeavoured to do -- take Young Marv's stockpiled trove of TCG cards both real and fake, and arrange them in order to create a physical pokedex. Every card that I don't have, or that the mystery box of 80 random 2nd-hand cards I bought online can't fill, I will have to draw myself. So we'll see if Future Marv can complete that one before she expires too.

Writing Okay so it probably started with a conversation with a coworker/new friend following my declaration of the physical pokedex project, about the various overly convoluted fan theories I have about Cynthia (Pokémon) specifically, which led to me discussing those with Sammy (my best friend for whom I'm using a psuedonym because she's on here and she doesn't need her brand poisoned by mine), which led to us yes-anding each other about it way too hard, which led to "what if Cynthia went back in time in Pokémon Legends Arceus instead of Akari," which led to a short improvised script of a moment between Cynthia and Cogita which was way too sweet and impactful, which led to "oh no I might actually have to write this fanfic now," which led to Sammy's simple, one-word reply: "Nano!" So a big thank you/fuck you to Sammy for removing my excuse to put off this fic just like all the others. Way to keep me accountable for my own work, you wonderful asshole.

I'm very excited because this has all reignited a love for Pokémon which I had feared was suddenly and resolutely dead. Why? Well, it's because of a cruel prank. Some people at Nintendo pulled a fast one on everyone a while back, trying to convince the whole community that there are nine generations now, when everyone knows that there are only eight, and the series ended with the release of PLA, and the end of the anime. It seems that some people in the community have been completely duped into believing that "Gen Nine" is real, and it's pretty mean-spirited of the people responsible to give them false hope like that. Which made me pretty upset, evidently. So yeah, it's good to put that negative episode aside and go back to focusing on my bullshit about Cynthia, Cogita and the male one, and all the lore around them I can squeeze into a fanfic.

Reading Okay, apparently I have failed to placate the nostalgia beast by managing to feed her a goddamn unicorn -- the last copy in the only store I found that sold it, of a volume of the YGO manga (a manga with a bajilion volumes) featuring my favourite duel of my favourite character, who of course is Mai because I'm only allowed to stan semi-irrelevant blonde ladies in all forms of media (it's a real burden). No instead, the nostalgia beast was so ravenous that she made me fixate on finding two YGO structure decks, at the only store I found that sells them (bit of a theme in this city), to subject poor Sammy to playing a game with me because I've never tried. And in all the nostalgia beasts constant squawking, I forgot to pick up those copies of Donuts that I was going to get last week.

Oh what's that? You want to actually know what I read? In the reading section? Well, exactly one volume of Donuts Under A Crescent Moon, hours and hours of lore and theories written by Sammy over text, and an obscene amount of info on YGO archetypes that had me saying "fuck this, I'll get a structure deck" within half an hour.

#journal #marvomakesathing #pokémon #cynthia pokemon #pokemon legends arceus #cogita #pokemon discourse #ygo #nostalgia #yes-and #pokedex #arts and crafts #procrastination #champion cynthia #cynthia #marv's obligation to only stan semi-irrelevant blonde girls

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3wisellamas · 3 years

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Giant Sweet Cap’n Cakes Headcanon Masterpost!

(Fun fact, I thought most of these up while on one REALLY long hike. ^^; You can tell I fell for these three pretty hard.)

Music:

-I like the idea that, while the three all share a love of hip hop, glitch hop, electronic music in general, and a little lo-fi for chill times, they all have different tastes outside of those. (Meaning if you pass them the aux cord, they WILL argue!)

-Sweet's actually the biggest audiophile of the group, with by far the most eclectic tastes; he will literally put together playlists that go from dubstep to heavy metal to classical to rap to vaporwave to even country. The others don't really get it, but they're cool with whatever he puts on, and learn a lot of new music from him!

-He also owns an electric guitar, which he just plugs into himself to use as an amp and plays early in the morning to wake the others up if needed (he's the early riser and the other two are night owls...)

-Cap'n's definitely got a more narrow focus than the other two; he likes rap and also R&B, jazz, and even a little swing/electro swing. He's also been caught more than once listening to cheesy romantic pop songs, claiming he's just into them for their potential madamoizel-attracting uses but really he's just a sappy romantic.

-He can also rap, very well in fact, and gets Sweet to beatbox while he freestyles.

-Heck, he's just got a good singing voice in general, helped by having a built-in autotune, and dominates at karaoke!

-K_K also has a really broad range, but stays more towards the electronic end of the spectrum -- melodic dubstep, synthpop, disco, trance, chiptune, DnB, even occasionally puts on straight-up ambient spa music to chill out to (the only genre the other two will NOT tolerate.)

-K_K has also, in the past, set up entire mini-raves just by themselves, complete with glowsticks and everything, while Cap'n and Sweet were out doing whatever. They were...not pleased, when they got back, mostly because they weren't invited. All three got to have one together eventually though.

-Physical media is king in their shop; if it's not on a CD, cassette tape, or a vinyl record (or an 8-track, though they have to dig out their old player for it), they will refuse to play it, and might even ask you to leave. "MP3" is an extremely dirty word to them.

-(In fact, they don't get along too well with the MP3 player-headed robots elsewhere in the city.)

-They are indeed always listening to music on physical media as well -- K_K and Cap'n are their own CD players (though Cap'n's one of those models that's also got a built-in FM radio), while Sweet has a straight-up Walkman.

-(He's also the group's cassette champion, claiming his media of choice is superior to CDs because you can record music on BOTH sides of the tape! The other two just don't have the heart to point out that each side only holds half as much music as a CD, and you don't even have to rewind those...)

-Jury's still out on Hit Clips. Cap'n and Sweet think they're just toys, but K_K genuinely collects and appreciates them and treats them like actual music (it helps that they are only around four seconds long!)

-Believe it or not, the headphones are only decoration, all three actually just...listen to their music entirely within their own heads, though they can also switch to playing it externally on their speakers as well. Perks of being robots! Though, sometimes K_K has his internal volume up too high, and misses things that other people say because of it.

-Sweet also has an input port, and connects himself to his turntable to act as the speakers! The other two are WAY too embarrassed to ask if they can use it as well.

-Sweet can play almost any instrument you throw at him, as long as it's not a woodwind (Surprisingly, he can do brass, since those work on vibration rather than air!). He prefers his guitar or violin when he isn't spinning records on his turntable. Where the other two just enjoy music, he's the actual trained musician.

Voice headcanons:

-Sweet: Kind of deep, bass-y, lots of reverb, a slight tinny audio distortion to it like a low-quality recording that becomes much more pronounced when he gets upset or starts shouting. And since he's a speaker, you can literally feel the vibrations he makes when he's speaking!

-Cap'n: Scout from TF2. I am sorry, but I absolutely cannot get that out of my head for him. XD However, he's actually putting that voice on as an "accent" of sorts, his real voice is actually super autotune-y like K_K's, and it comes out whenever he gets flustered, his pitch only getting higher and higher as it gets worse...

-K_K: Pure autotune, he can just do whatever the hell he wants with his voice -- pitch, tone, whatever, and while he tends to keep it a little higher he can and does change it to fit his mood! He often has a completely different voice every day, but the others are used to it. He also just straight-up vocalizes sound effects (like, the kind that make you go "How did you just make that sound with your mouth?!") and can mimic other people perfectly (though the slight mechanical distortion does give it away). There are absolutely no rules when it comes to K_K's voice.

-They harmonize perfectly whenever they sing together!

Sweet:

-I like to think Sweet's actually the brains of the group; like, not SMART, he just holds their one collective braincell most often. He does any technical work when they're building stuff, like soldering circuits or the occasional programming, and even handles a lot of the actual business operations and pays the bills. The other two also like to follow his lead when it comes to rebellion plans, even if he’s not the official leader.

-That said, though? It's balanced out by him being rather hotheaded and having the shortest temper by a lot. There are REASONS why he's not usually out selling bagels with the others -- he's unfortunately prone to some more "extreme" sales tactics, like hurling half their stock at random passersby until they finally agree to buy some. On the plus side, he's always the first to step up to defend the gang from anything that dares to harm them, and is always on guard.

-He can also hold a heck of a grudge -- don't ever get on his bad side! Cap'n and K_K are mostly immune to this though, if he gets upset with them he works through it by the end of the day. It helps that they can all hug it out.

-He's a bit of a perfectionist, often working overtime to try and get everything they build exactly right. He can get really frustrated when things don't work out the way he plans, or when he can't make sense of a problem, or when Cap'n and K_K are goofing off instead of doing their part, and needs to go blast some loud music and blow off steam.

-He does have a really tough time keeping his balance, since his head is a bit heavier than the rest of his body, but he takes tripping over his own feet constantly in stride. The biggest problem he has is with dancing -- while he'll join in with the others on occasion, he can't match their more acrobatic moves and sticks more to actually PLAYING the music they're dancing to.

-He's also really, really unlucky, just in general. He actually considers the other two his good luck charms, since they help him out whenever he trips or gets into a bad spot!

-He's the fashionista of the group, surprisingly. It's difficult for him to find clothes that fit his body, so he tends to get a little creative with it and has a whole closet full of different stuff! And since Cap'n is roughly the same size they'll occasionally swap jackets.

Cap’n:

-Cap'n actually has managed to score a handful of dates with girls in the past! However, NONE of them went well, and only one actually made it to the second date (only to break up right in the middle of it), so he always ends up returning home heartbroken and in tears. Sweet and K_K, by this point just ready for it whenever they hear that he's going out that night, always dry him off before he shorts himself out, take him to bed and cuddle with him (platonically, I don't see them as brothers but I also don't see them as having that conversation until Cap'n's ready, which he clearly is NOT), remind him that it doesn't hurt forever and he isn't unlovable and that he'll find someone eventually, etc.

-They have sat him down multiple times to try and gently suggest to Cap'n that he might just not be into women? And that he’s actually turning them off by trying so hard? To which he's always just like "No, of course not. I'm straight. Love the ladies. Totally. Oh no they didn't catch me checkin' out that one dude earlier did they? Is that what this is about?!"

-(Basically, Cap'n is just a hopeless romantic in love with the idea of being in love, but is absolutely clueless as to how it works or what he actually wants, and his best buds are always there to catch him when he falls. ;v; )

-The glasses are prescription -- he's SUPER nearsighted, a hardware glitch he refuses to fix. Sometimes when he's working on something close up he'll take them off, panicking when he can't find them afterwards, only to have the others point out that they're just on his head. He’s also got non-tinted glasses, but you will not catch him DEAD wearing those unless it’s an absolute emergency.

-This dude is SUPREMELY insecure with himself. Like, his rather questionable fixation on romance aside, he basically runs off of others' validation, the "cool" persona he's spent much of his life building up being how he hides the fact that he isn't really sure who he is, or what he wants to do with his life, or what he's even good for -- the others have learned to check on him now and then whenever he hides away in the back of the shop, since he can slip into some pretty dark places when left alone to sulk. It took a long time for him to open up even to them to share his feelings, and sometimes still has doubts about whether they or anyone else really care about him as more than just The Smooth One...

-He's the only one of the three to actually enjoy the occasional silence, especially when he's trying to think, or whenever he's upset. So, his headphones also serve a dual purpose -- they're noise-cancelling!

-He's the video guy, carrying around a small camcorder and constantly trying to record the group's activities, to put together into music videos! He also just likes to record himself doing stupid stunts for posterity, though K_K just takes these and makes (affectionate) blooper reels.

-Cap'n is not his real name, similar to K_K. However, unlike K_K, he refuses to say what it is, just that it's embarrassing.

K_K:

-K_K has a bad habit of just completely zoning out when he gets into his music, getting completely lost in the groove and needing to be pulled back to reality. It's not a bad thing during jam sessions, but at work, or in the middle of a battle...not so much.

-He kind of needs to have some kind of music going at all times -- silence drives him absolutely CRAZY! Though, because he gets distracted by his own music, he then misses out on entire conversations, only tuning back in towards the end. Sometimes the other two have to repeat or summarize what they just said for him.

-He knows sign language, and taught the others to use it. They're able to communicate reasonably well no matter how loud their shop gets, or on days when K_K isn't able to form words properly (he's just shy, and even when he isn't he gets tongue-tied a LOT).

-He's easily the best dancer of the three, and uses his extendable body to get really creative with his moves! He even knows a little ballroom, somehow, which he'll pull out sometimes to make the others laugh.

-(Seriously, K_K CANNOT stand to see Sweet or Cap'n not smiling. He'll do anything to keep the group's spirits up, usually cracking jokes during a scrap project or doing little favors, and they appreciate all his efforts!)

-K_K has the WORST sleep cycle, ever. If you let him, he will stay up all night working or partying, finally going to bed at 6AM, and will then sleep until 6PM if the others don't wake him up at some point. If they know he was up really late they'll let him sleep in a little, but he's often pretty sleep-deprived and running solely on sugar and caffeine, which doesn't help his natural loopiness.

-He is a VERY physical guy. Seriously, he will just scoop up and hold Sweet or Cap'n like a cat every five minutes; at first they were just like "Oh. Okay. We're hugging now I guess," but after a while they got more used to it and even anticipate when K_K is going to do it. And he also initiates tons of snuggles and gives piggyback rides whenever one of his bandmates (usually Sweet) requests.

-K_K actually scrapbooks, collecting pictures and little mementos of places he and the others have gone and things they've done. After the library fountain is sealed, he pulls them out to show everyone else from Cyber City and reminisce about home.

-It's very hard to make K_K angry, since he tends to stay super chill and brushes off almost everything. But, on those very, very rare occasions when something does get under his metal outer casing, he'll go full-on silent treatment, not speaking to anyone for up to a week as he sulks and stomps around the junk shop, and even refuses to play any music! And no amount of sweets or hugs or cheering up will bring him out of it, either; the other two have learned to just wait him out and let him have his space, letting him come to them when he's finally ready to talk about it.

Misc:

-Though all three love everything sweet, K_K's the only one who really goes overboard with it, making whole meals out of candy. Sweet, ironically enough, actually prefers more salty/savory snacks, while the less is said about Cap'n's hot sauce addiction, the better.

-Okay, actually, I will say more about it. Cap'n loves spicy food in general, and literally drinks tabasco sauce right from the bottle. However, he's got a bad habit of daring himself to eat hotter and hotter stuff, ESPECIALLY if someone is watching, and can easily get in WAY over his head before begging for milk.

-They also all totally drink battery acid like Queen.

-Heck, being both Darkners and robots, they can really eat literally anything. Normal food, milk, oil, batteries, gallons of pure sugar, toothpaste, moss, glitter (NEVER let K_K get hold of any though, he gets lost in the sauce), broken glass, etc, and of course their own deep-fried CDs. Only thing they can't do is water, since, you know, robots.

-With a lot of the aesthetics of Cyber City being close to turn-of-the millennium and early 2000s (CDs and boomboxes, popup ads, wired mice, Queen theorized to be one of those see-through iMacs, EVERYTHING about Spamton), I like the idea that the boys DO NOT have smartphones, and if you handed them one they'd have no clue how to use it or what to do with it. But they do have cell phones: Sweet's got an old flip phone covered in stickers (courtesy of K_K), Cap'n splurged for one of those that slide open and with a camera (he set his background to a tiny, grainy photo of the three of them!), and K_K has one of those indestructible Nokia bricks, that Sweet got him after he kept breaking all his other ones. They can all text, but that's about as high-tech as they get.

-Same with tablets or newer computers in general, they might share one tiny netbook at most. Cap’n never remembers to log out of his Dark World dating profile, so the others will snoop or post embarrassing things to it.

-They're really, really durable, even without milk -- they're made of 90s plastic and electronics, so it takes a LOT to take one of them down! Plus, they regularly repair each other back at the shop (it took a LONG time for them to gain enough trust to physically open and work on each other), so as long as at least one's left to drag the other two to safety they'll be just fine.

-However, if they get splashed with water, caught in the rain, or worse, drowned, they will short out, or shut down on the spot to prevent damage. Once they completely dry out, though, they'll start right back up, no worse for wear. When only one of them gets waterlogged the other two will break out the hair dryers to dry them out faster, or even pop them into the oven in a pan of rice like an iPod that got dropped in the toilet...

Finally, backstory?

-Cap'n and K_K met first -- maybe both as new recruits to another, much less savory gang of music equipment robots, and bonded as a result of being put upon by the more established members (Cap'n probably even had to defend K_K more than once when his inattentiveness got him into trouble!) But, they both had enough one day, and decided to break off and form their own thing, making music and selling CD bagels to support themselves.

-Sweet, meanwhile, has the complete opposite background, coming from a rich and important family of musicians in Cyber City who regularly entertained Queen in her mansion (hence why he always used to get sweets from her!) But, he was kind of the black sheep, preferring his own style of music, and decided to strike out on his own as a street musician instead.

-They met when Cap'n and K_K accidentally set up to sell bagels on Sweet's usual corner, and he battled them to reclaim his turf. But, they were evenly-matched (even two-to-one; Sweet's definitely the strongest of the trio!), and impressed each other with both their fighting and musical skills, so Sweet decided to join their tiny group, and thus Sweet Cap'n Cakes was formed.

-After the whole situation with Queen is resolved, SCC turns their rebellion into an anti-DRM kind of thing? Nobody can hold back the music, man!

#deltarune #sweet cap'n cakes #deltarune sweet #deltarune cap'n #deltarune k_k #sweet #cap'n #k_k #emheadcanons

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ialwaysknewyouwerepunk · 3 years

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fine line - a close reading

gonna cry bc i’m at the end, gonna cry bc it’s fine line.

(x x x)

want to give the same disclaimer as with lights up: this song is so layered, so multi-faceted, that i could never hope to give an exhaustive analysis. due to its vagueness and openness for interpretation, i assume that everyone, just like me, has their own ideas about it and has attached importance to it in ways that no one else’s words can or should alter. this song means the world to me for reasons that aren’t necessarily in this post, and that’s how it is with art that touches us deeply. i’ve tried my best to pull it apart, lay it bare, spread it open, if you will, so it’s almost as free as it can be for you all to form your own opinion on it. in the synthesis i will make my own conclusions, but feel free to ignore that if yours are totally different. i’m just one set of brain and heart taking in fine line and projecting whatever i think is right onto it. alright, let’s go

fine line, track 12

sung in falsetto

live version at the form: first verse not sung in falsetto - after first chorus goes into falsetto - like “thinking of her” has summoned her

Put a price on emotion

pouring emotions into the art you create: how much is genuine / how much do you show - line between being authentic to your audience and giving away too much, wanting to keep things to yourself and not feeling truthful with what you’ve written

exploits of the industry: lay your soul bare - or the exact opposite, some pretend emotion - to score that hit

I'm looking for something to buy

cynical. emotions aren’t genuine, right? where can i go buy some?

～ lights up themes. fake life, industry, being a sell-out

You've got my devotion

But man, I can hate you sometimes

“you” = career, music, Harry Styles™. devoted to the craft, to the job, all the ups and downs of it, despite the hardships it brings

“man” is deliberate: can be seen as an offhand interjection, like “man, that’s rough”, but nothing is casually placed in this song. “man” is: The Man, the heads in the industry, the people pulling the strings. The man in Harry, the man he’s been in the media all these years, the part he’s played/had to play, the man that’s in him

⟶ “hate you”: hate for industry shit, self-hate created by having to play pretend (～ only angel analysis, the persona of the Bukowski womaniser)

“sometimes” - it’s not fucked up all the time

“you” could also be a lover, but the sudden “hate” there then would be for that person, which is absent in any other song about them, doesn’t make any sense

I don't want to fight you

And I don't want to sleep in the dirt

like there’s a choice to me made, but he doesn’t want to make it: either I fight this “you” or I sleep in the dirt

“you” as the industry: if he doesn’t fight them, he might end up being a beggar, lose all his self-worth bc he gave in to everything they asked/told him to do

“you” as himself: fight your instincts, part of who you are/the persona. if he doesn’t fight to figure himself out, though, he fears he’ll also lose

“sleep in the dirt” as a sense of rejection, as well

We'll get the drinks in

So I'll get to thinking of her

drinks to cope - falling, only angel, from the dining table - or to be braver and confront emotions better - tbsl

who is “we”? who is “her”?

narrative of “you” as “lover” further disproven: if “I” and the lover get together over drinks and “I” starts thinking of “her”?

⟷ “her” could be the lover, but then who is “you”? the industry? some other person, besides that lover, harry is devoted to? multiple lovers, all of a sudden? no.

⟶ “I” and “you” are all harry, that get to thinking of “her” because she is in daydreams with him. the narrative that harry is fighting a part of him, the persona he has (had) to play bc of industry limits, makes most sense. that persona is within him now, and part of his work, but all of him, “we”, is begging to come into the light - of which she is a huge part

We'll be a fine line

balancing act. let everything coexist but pay attention that those lines don’t get crossed the wrong way. what we are, what i am, is a fine line between what makes us go under and what lets us thrive

we will be: determination to fulfil this prophecy, statement of fact “we always will be”

“we’ll be a fine line”: other way of interpreting it is that on both sides of that line is what entails “we”, all that is harry. what merges on that fine line is where it’s just right, when harry is fully himself in every way

“fine line” can also be an echo of criticism, bigotry, in the style of: it’s a fine line between being simply flamboyant and queer, between dressing like that and people thinking you’re a transvestite or summat (cause we wouldn’t want that, now, would we) - “we’ll be a fine line” could be owning all of it. putting himself in the middle of all those messy lines, as someone queer without a category

Test of my patience

patience with himself - kindness to self - took a long time to figure shit out and it was a challenge

waiting for change: industry and its allowances/openness

There's things that we'll never know

my favorite line

“we” = harry / harry and company / us in general, all of us listening

～ tpwk “i don’t need all the answers”: deep sense of acceptance

peace to be found in accepting this!!

You sunshine, you temptress

“sunshine” - as in all the love songs (blue skies, sunflowers, summer days…): lover - possible that there are multiple “you”s in this song?

sunshine could ofc also be directed at the temptress, still

female “temptress” - “i’ll get to thinking of her” - she - it’s tempting for harry to think of her all the time, to lose himself in the “her” in him

other interpretation for “temptress”: woman he knows with negative influence in his life - resemblance to woman “you flower, you feast”, so echo of Bukowski ～ only angel, kiwi (my sunshine, my love, who is involved with this temptress…)

My hand’s at risk, I fold

⟷ tpwk “dropping into the deep end”

not showing his cards just yet / forfeits

anxious to show all of him, to take the chance, with all the risks and consequences involved

Crisp trepidation

I’ll try to shake this soon

nervousness, anxiety - about (not) taking (enough) chances, (not) laying himself bare (release of the album that reveals much more than before)

“crisp” fresh, this feeling is unfamiliar - change is coming “soon”

sense of agency: I can get rid of this feeling by my own volition and make these changes - hesitant, insecure: “try”

wants to be braver. he’s not going back, but still needs to calmly coax himself further and further into the light, out into the open (“we’ll be alright”)

Spreading you open

Is the only way of knowing you

(can anyone else hear “spread thin” like a whisper under “spreading”? or am i imagining things.)

“you” is back - the only way of knowing “you” is to spread them open - the physical

to spread someone open - very literal, don’t need to paint the picture, or to lay bare, to lay it all out

⟶ “you” as himself - the only way of knowing who i am is by doing this: writing this album, performing these songs, letting others listen in and form their own interpretations, let this world grow where i’m laid bare and OPEN and exist as this person who has issues, who is angry, who doesn’t know who he is a lot of the time, but is still so happy to be here - let it spread and let it all circle back to me so i can grow deeper into myself

We'll be a fine line

We'll be alright

“we” = h & self, h & lover, h & fans

collectiveness from tpwk

(notes on a piano sounding like drops, like he’s emerged from the water and dripping dry)

SYNTHESIS

Everything about this song is plural. Personal pronouns are all over the place. I, you, her, we. The sound is incredibly layered, with Harry’s own voice echoing through its verses like he’s singing to himself in an empty cave. Meanings can be attached to every word like it’s a wax tablet used too many times. What Harry has said in interviews for once holds pretty true to the actual meaning, in my opinion.

“It felt like it described to me the process of making it and how the album felt in terms of the different kinds of songs on it.” (Capital FM)

This can mean a lot of things, and I think it means all of the things, of course. It means Fine Line is a summary of all of his emotions he visited on the album, of the things he’s laid bare. And it means that the actual process was also described, as one that can be frustrating and challenging, with added industry shit.

Harry has expressed straightforward gratefulness to his label for "leaving (him) alone” while making the album and that speaks volumes. This time, he had the chance to make his art without the constant interference of a label, which meant he could weave in criticism as well. “Put a price on emotion” is first and foremost a critique on the industry. It’s the first line of the song, setting the tone for the interpretation of this song is about the risks I took while making this album. It involves criticism on an industry that creates such an atmosphere that only a certain type of music and artist breaks through or can be successful, that limits people in their personal expression. Convinces them that it’s better that way. That it’s better to hide who they love because the general public won’t accept them. That it’s better to create a song about a fake emotion than be honest. Harry loves writing songs and being on stage, but it’s taken a while for him to be fully comfortable there as a solo artist and bloom into the person that could make Fine Line. He loves his career, but it’s also limited his freedom in ways beyond our comprehension, and it’s exploited him to the point where he didn’t know who he was, in ways that have clearly taken a toll on his mental wellbeing. To a point where he finishes this album reassuring himself, most of all, that everything will be alright.

That process of making Fine Line obviously includes Harry confronting emotions he hadn’t before. He has stated that he experienced the highest highs and the lowest lows while making it. There are things he hates, he was fighting but doesn’t want to (anymore), uncertainties he was trying to figure out but had to accept he couldn’t, risks he still doesn’t know he can take without shaking. At the centre of it all is this sense of “knowing you.” The different personal pronouns in the song paint a fractured picture, which is ultimately deliberate. That the “you” Harry is devoted to and can hate sometimes doesn’t line up with “her,” that the end focus does seem to be this “you” that is mentioned in the same breath as “man” and “temptress,” forming the “we” together with “I”.

After having songs like Lights Up, She, Falling and even TPWK, one of the central themes on the album has undoubtedly been self-discovery, in all its pain and glory. There are no female pronouns on the album besides, obviously, in She, and then here, in Fine Line. She is about a man living with a woman “just in his head”, who “sleeps in his bed while he plays pretend.” It is very clearly a trans narrative, the story of someone struggling to put into words what they’re experiencing in terms of gender. To a point that they fantasise about running away. Fine Line brings the ideas of knowing what it all means, which Lights Up kicks off (“do you know who you are?”), Falling deepens (“what am I now?”) and Treat People With Kindness turns on its head (“I don’t need all the answers”), together. Harry is still doubtful, and the questions asked earlier in the album haven’t disappeared, but he has accepted that “some things we’ll never know.” His aim, however, is still “knowing you.”

To have Fine Line, as the summary of these emotions of self-growth and self-discovery, echo that one female pronoun, speaks volumes. It is a direct reference to She, to that story about gender. “Her” in this song refers to “she (who) lives in daydreams with (him).” The one who still only fully comes out when they’ve had a drink. The one he’s still working to include in who he is, as he tries to figure out who he is, all of it. The song where he sings in falsetto, just like on Fine Line. Of which he sang the first verse an octave lower live at the forum, switching between those voices, those perspectives. That’s also why “you” in this song is also Harry to me. We get this fractured sense of self, this “I” and “you” conversing over a drink, this “you” Harry is devoted to and wants to figure out. “You” and “I” form “we” and all of them are Harry. The lines are blurry on purpose, there is no way to figure out where “you” ends and “I” begins.

“You sunshine, you temptress” is the most enigmatic line in that respect, and to me blurs those lines even more between the pronouns. “You” is suddenly also identified by a female noun. And no this isn’t about some kind of love triangle. “Sunshine” aligns with all the odes to his lover in the rest of the album. So what does that mean? That there are multiple “you”s in this song, meaning that Harry is addressing both his lover and a temptress? So “her” he’ll get to thinking of, the only other female pronoun used in the song, is identified as a temptress, but tempting to do what? To take risks? And no I won’t forget the “man, I can hate you sometimes,” where "man” is not a casual interjection but an identifier of “you.”

Or is it an echo of “the light” from Golden’s “bring me back to the light” and Light’s Up’s “step into the light”? So that the “sunshine” symbolises being in the clear, being out of the darkness running through his heart, the darkness caused by not knowing who you are. “You sunshine,” you beacon of light. “You temptress,” risk-taker and source of anxiety. You, one I need to spread open to figure out, to know about, source of happiness and despair, one I’m devoted to but also hate. You, man, you, temptress. You there, in the mirror looking back at me.

All of you, and myself included, we’ll be a fine line. And we’ll be alright.

This song is about all of that. The self in art, the self on its own, the other, the journey, the chances, the fears, the passion. Hope. Reassurance. Confidence. And, most importantly, that everything will be alright in the end.

read all my lyric analyses here

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cheri-translates · 3 years

Text

[CN] Gavin’s Sky Date - Prologue

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date prologue, 云霄之约, which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

Do note that you have to read this before embarking on the actual date, because it contains background information and sweet domestic bliss you wouldn't want to miss :>

[ This date was released on 14 April 2021 ]

[ Part One: A Dream About to Take Flight ]

MC: Ahhh! My life is up to me. Not. Up. To. Fate!

The small dice in my furled hand is tossed around several times. When I loosen my grip, it rolls quickly on the map -- ‘2′.

Gavin: Hahaha--

Gavin laughs, but hurriedly retracts his smile when he senses my murderous gaze.

Gavin: It’s okay, things will definitely take a favourable turn in the next round.

Sulky, I let out of a huff. I watch as he picks up the dice, casually rolling a '5′. Then, he cheerfully shifts his own plane on the map by six spaces.

[Note] In the game of Aeroplane Chess, your plane can only leave the starting point if you roll a ‘5′ of ‘6′!

MC: ...

It’s a Saturday afternoon. Gavin and I had nothing to do after eating, so we randomly grabbed a set of Aeroplane Chess from the supermarket to play. But I didn’t expect to have such a terrible gaming experience!

Although it’s been the sixth or seventh round, I just can’t the ‘6′ I need to get my plane out of the hangar. On the other hand, Gavin has always been able to get it to take flight smoothly, and very quickly reaches the goal.

MC: Gavin, with your kind of luck, there’s no need to waste it on playing games with me.

After pondering for a long while, I offer him a serious suggestion.

MC: Let’s head out to buy a lottery ticket?

Gavin: Why don’t we play something else? The paper model from last time was only half done. Since we have time today, we could get it done at one go.

At this moment, the phone on the floor beside me rings. Seeing the familiar number, I tap on the hands-free function.

Nurse: Miss MC, the physical report done at our hospital is ready. Please bring your receipt and collect it within fifteen working days.

MC: Mm, got it, thank you.

Gavin is currently storing the Aeroplane Chess pieces into the box. Hearing this conversation, he gives me a puzzled look.

Gavin: Haven’t you already gone for a physical examination this year? Are you feeling unwell?

MC: No, no. I’m using the report for the registration.

I deliberately pretend to be secretive, leaning towards him. Then, I show him the registration form that I had submitted online beforehand.

MC: I’m going to get a Private Pilot License.

[ Part Two: First Day of School ]

On the first day of aviation training, I set the alarm to wake me up at 6.30am. Even Gavin is stunned at the level of enthusiasm I have for learning.

Gavin: The courses for the aviation license can get pretty dry. You have to be mentally prepared.

MC: Are you referring to things like meteorology, aircraft structure, air traffic regulations?

Gavin: Mm. Aside from the exams, such knowledge is necessary for aircraft pilots.

While he speaks, he lifts his head to give me a smile.

Gavin: But they definitely won’t stump you.

After packing my things, I grab a random jacket and prepare to leave.

The classes take place in the suburbs, and it takes an hour to get there. Despite waking up early, I’d be late if I don’t hurry up.

But Gavin is clearly not too worried about this matter. He holds a slice of bread in his mouth while looking at his phone.

Gavin: Since I’m sending you there, you won’t be late. Before your first official lesson, I’ll give you a flight class.

I walk over to him, pulling up the zipper of his uniform, and also picking up the motorcycle helmet from the table.

MC: To prevent this from being a mere flash in the pan, I want to leave the joy of flight to the end of the course. But if going by land would make me late...

Gavin rolls the bread into his mouth, taking the helmet from my hand.

Gavin: No matter the route, you won’t be late. Oh yes, what class are you taking today?

[ Part Two, Option 1: Principles of Meteorology ]

Instructor: I’ll ask some small questions to test your foundation and see if you take note of knowledge in this area.

He opens the PowerPoint presentation, then uses a laser pointer to point at the image on the first page - it's a cumulus cloud with a flat bottom layer and a high, upward curve at the top.

Instructor: Does anyone know what this cloud is called?

MC: Cumulus congestus cloud.

Instructor: Correct. The next question - when the International Civil Aviation Organisation observes cloud volume, how many segments do they divide the sky into?

MC: It should be eight segments.

I recall that Gavin brought this up before.

Instructor: Not bad, miss. You did preparatory work beforehand, didn’t you?

MC: No no, I have a friend who has a better understanding in this area, so I was just influenced.

After saying this, chuckles drift from the surroundings. The instructor nods in understanding.

Instructor: In that case, you won’t have a problem during the exams.

MC: ...I’ll do my best.

After all, my confidence is limited when it comes to exams.

Just as I’m thinking about this, I receive a notification on my phone. Gavin has sent me an incredibly large document file.

Gavin: I don’t know how to teach, so I compiled some materials you might need for the exam.

I grip my phone, suddenly feeling like the weather is so good that it makes one carefree and relaxed.

It’s just an exam. I’ll definitely be fine.

[ Part Two, Option 2: Aviation Regulations Class ]

At 2pm in the afternoon, the sun shines from above. I had a full meal, so fighting against the sleeping bug is a difficult challenge.

Instructor: Before the flight, the captain has to carry out the necessary inspections of the aircraft. Until the inspections are complete, you can’t take off. This regulation is easy to understand. In fact...

When the dullness of the course matches how fine the weather is, the entire classroom gets immersed in a drowsy atmosphere.

I take a few deep breaths and pat my face... but I still feel like sleeping.

Instructor: Okay, we’ll take a 10 minute break. You students look sleepy, so go wash your faces to freshen up.

The moment he finishes speaking, the sound of heads plopping down on the tables can be heard all around.

Just as I prepare to stand up and stretch, my phone suddenly vibrates.

Delivery boy: Hello, I’ve placed your take-out at the main counter.

MC: Take-out?

But I didn’t order take-out...

While I’m puzzled, the young lady from the main counter very politely brings the item to the classroom - it’s a cup of coffee.

There’s only one simple line on the note of the take-out: Persevere for a little longer. Gavin.

I retrieve the coffee from the bag, taking a tiny slip. The instructor walks past, giving me a glance from the side.

Instructor: Are you drinking coffee or milk tea? You’re smiling so happily.

MC: Being able to swim in the ocean of knowledge is always meant to be a happy thing.

The instructor gives me an expression which says, “like I’d actually believe you”.

MC: Instructor, let’s continue with the lesson. I’m not drowsy anymore. Learning for another four hours is no problem at all!

[ Part Three: Being Your Co-pilot ]

Gavin: Do you want to head out for a stroll after dinner? It seems to be really cooling outside.

I’m currently taking out plates from the kitchen drawer, subconsciously craning my head to glance outside.

MC: It’s going to rain, isn’t it...

Gavin: Really? I’ll check the weather forecast. Earlier in the afternoon, Eli mentioned taking out some time to wash his car at night. I even thought today would be a good day.

I step into the living room, setting down plates on the dining table.

MC: There are just some cumulonimbus clouds in the sky. It might not really rain.

Gavin scrolls through the real-time weather, then gives me a smile.

Gavin: It’s really going to rain.

He gets up, opening the rice cooker and scooping a full bowl of rice for me.

Gavin: At first, I even thought you’d find such theoretical knowledge boring. I didn’t think you’d learn them so earnestly. Looks like you really want to get the license.

MC: Of course. I want to be your co-pilot.

Although Gavin hasn’t even scooped rice for himself, he’s already served me a huge pile of vegetables.

Gavin: Sure. I’ll wait for the day you get your license.

Just as I’m about to talk about how assured I am about getting the license, I realise that the plate on my hand is becoming fuller and fuller.

Before I can even voice my question, Gavin responds.

Gavin: Learning is tough. You need to eat a little more. I also bought you ice-cream. It’s in the second compartment of the freezer. I remember you mentioning that as long as you eat something delicious during difficult times, you can press on easily.

MC: ...hahaha! Mm! After having this meal, I’ll complete all my post-class homework!

[ Aviation Terminology Class ]

MC: Calling for the control tower. Number N8596 has arrived, and is requesting for a landing gate.

Gavin (through the phone): Number N8596, you may use aircraft Gate Number One.

Gavin’s light-hearted laughter drifts from the phone.

Gavin: Shouldn’t your class end at 7pm? It’s only 6pm.

MC: The plan was to be dismissed at 7pm, but... for some reason, those in my class were really interested in the Aviation Terminology class, so they did their preparatory work in advance. The three hour class was over in one and a half hours. The instructor said that we already grasped all the key points, so we were dismissed early. What about you? How much longer till you’re off work?

Gavin: For me... less than half an hour. You could think about what to do with this unexpectedly free hour. I remember that there’s a new dessert shop opposite the cinema.

MC: You remembered? I never even told you about it. How could you remember? Officer Gavin, you better tell me the truth. You didn’t remember it - you specially searched it up.

Gavin: Mm, I specially searched it up. I even found that there are claw machines along the shopping street on the ground level of the cinema.

MC: Looks like what I’m going to do in the next hour has already been scheduled.

Gavin: Wait for me at the office first. I’ll look for you once I’m done with the work on hand.

[ Part Four: Flight Practice ]

Today’s the first flight practice class. The instructor is sitting in the co-pilot seat, watching my every move throughout the entire journey.

I wasn't nervous at first, but each time he glances at me, I involuntary wonder if I’ve done something wrong.

In an instant, I recall the fear of taking the aviation exam...

Until the plane successfully takes flight, I keep feeling as though the thing suspending in the air isn’t the plane, but my heart.

Instructor: It’s rare for you to make a trip up here. What’s there to be nervous about? Come, lift your head and look at the sky.

At this moment, countless gripes flash across my mind: What’s so nice about the sky? I’ve seen all kinds of skies. Right now, all I want is to fly the plane...

But the moment I lift my head, I’m rendered speechless.

Instructor: How is it? The first time I saw it, I was so stunned that I couldn't speak either.

MC: It’s really beautiful.

Sunlight casts a layer of golden hue on the soft and white clouds, blending the colours of gold and crimson.

I’m unable to describe how the scenery before me makes me feel.

It’s a feeling which... makes one feel that life has meaning.

All of a sudden, another thought surfaces in my mind: I wonder what went through Gavin’s mind when he saw such a sight for the first time.

The instructor sitting next to me glances at me from the side.

Instructor: Thinking about your boyfriend again?

MC: [blushing] ...no!

Instructor: It’s normal. Each time I’m flying, I can’t help but think of my wife. There isn’t a reason to it. It’s just a sudden thought, an involuntary reaction.

The instructor laughs as he gives me advice with a contagious smile.

Instructor: If you’re thinking about him, just do it. It’s fine. It’s a normal thing. When you see certain things, your natural reaction is to think of someone.

MC: ...Instructor, I usually can’t tell, but you’re actually quite philosophical.

I grab the joystick of the plane, watching as countless clouds drift past leisurely.

All I want to do is take a photograph of this moment for Gavin.

Date: here

Gavin watching as I drool over the thought of Eli scrubbing his car in the rain while wearing a singlet:

#mlqc #mlqc cn #mlqc spoilers #mlqc gavin #summary of the prologue: gavin is the perfect boyfriend

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flirtyhyuck · 3 years

Text

ily

; how jaemin expresses love without saying it directly

; jaemin x gender neutral reader

; love languages, pure fluff

; 3k wc

Words of Affirmation

Jaemin doesn't have a way with words, something clear since the day you met. With his simple vocabulary consisting of mostly sound effects, you wonder how he's able to melt you with the slightest mumble of praise. It's everything about him - everything other than his actual words. It's his compliments coated in honey, slipping from his wide grin beneath gleaming eyes, so earnest and loving, that has your chest tightening.

"You're even more gorgeous in person," he cooed when you first met, blinking in appreciation but not straying away from your eyes at all, not even when you stare back in shock. Everyone loves a compliment or two but online, no matter how much you appreciated it, Jaemin's emojis and capital letters were no match for the cheesiness of his physical expression.

He never learns to tone it down, always sending you an appreciative once over along with a wave of adoring words to last you for a month. Whether that be in the form of text messages, shouting across the hallway, romantic whispers, Instagram comments, or even bragging about you with his friends, Jaemin loves to talk.

"Hey, princess," he greets you sleepily, feet dragging across the kitchen tiles with no energy to put into actual steps. You smile at his messy black bed hair and turn back to your coffee, stirring with an absent mind. He never learned to stick to one pet name, always bouncing around the few he's become accustomed to. You think he's picked up on your favourites though, usually choosing to call you princess with a proud lick of lips.

"Morning," you chime back, finally lifting the cup to your lips with a hesitant sip. Hot, you think, but let the boiling drink into your mouth anyway, too tired to care about the pain.

Jaemin seems to notice it, sending you a playful giggle as he pops his favourite sunflower seed bread into the toaster. You glare back and put the mug down with a roll of eyes, clicking your tongue at his teasing through a fond smile. Your boyfriend sighs, leaning back against the counter with crossed arms and a soft gaze before humming out, "have I ever told you how cute you look in the mornings?"

You halt for a moment before your lips tug up slightly, shy, and you bring the coffee back up to hide your loving reaction. "You have," you groan in exasperation, raising a brow at the man to ask what of the comment. As if an embarrassed school girl, you avert your gaze and twiddle your thumbs, attentive to his response but becoming more and more flustered when you meet his eyes.

"It seemed like a good time to tell you again then," he chuckles with a shake of his head. With a tilt of his head, observing like an innocent puppy, the corner of his lips tug up into an attractive smirk. His words are knowing when he coos, "my princess is so pretty in the mornings. Still sleepy and in my clothes."

"Yours," you sigh back in a daze, pupils shaping into hearts at the very sound of the word. The hem of his jumper rolls between your fingertips and you drown in the familiarity of the comforting fabric, worn down and mixed with both of your scents.

"Adorable you are," he lulls, turning around to pop out the toast impatiently. It hasn't gotten brown yet. Jaemin spins back around after putting the bread back in with a groan, giving your sleepwear a once over before silently thinking to himself, contemplating. "You should wear that blue shirt you bought last week," he suggests.

You'd never thought about wearing it to work before.

"I really like how it looks on you," he compliments, genuine and whole-hearted about his appreciation.

"Thank you." There's those butterflies again, the cloudy feeling in your head as your confidence raises just the slightest, reassured. Accepting compliments is always a struggle but with Jaemin, there's not even any room to ponder the praise, a statement said with so much simplicity and care that doubt just isn't correct.

Jaemin adds, "though I think you look good in everything.*

Acts of Service

When they say chivalry isn't dead, they're talking about Jaemin. There's no doubt his pride when it comes to helping you out, so in love with receiving a thankful kiss or smile that he'll go out of his way any time he can. Dishes after a dinner party, making the bed every morning, stocking the groceries, making breakfast, dropping you off to work or school - the list goes on but by far his absolute favourite is giving massages.

With an echoing, exhausted groan you fall into the hot bathtub with closed eyes, allowing your body to slowly submerge and get used to the heat. The water is a pastel purple, white glitter floating on the top with tiny daisies bobbing up and down with every wave your fingers send their way. The air is filled with an artificial lavender similar to that of your car freshener but you appreciate the effort anyway, taking in a deep breath letting the scent flow through your brain like peach fuzz. Candles are lit on your sink counter, the closed lid of your toilet, and the corners of the bathtub itself. Jaemin asks if you'd like the lights off with that and you nod softly, listening to the switch flick as soft music lulls through the air, reverberated by your bathroom walls.

"I made a playlist for this too," Jaemin grins proudly at his Spotify playlist listed as a single bathtub emoji. How appropriate. He sets it down on the floor at a low volume and lets the world fade away, only orange candle wicks slowly burning away with the movement of water to fill your blank minds.

Jaemin sits outside the tub, fully clothed but just as content, with an adoring gaze laid upon his open palms. "Do you like it, princess?" he asks, already knowing your answer but dying to hear it himself.

"Oh Nana, how much I love this," you lilt through an exhausted smirk, eyes fluttering open to appreciate his skin glowing in the fire light, "you must've worked so hard on this just for me. Everything is absolutely perfect and I couldn't have asked for anything more, you didn't even need to do this in the first place."

He beams, satisfied, "as long as you like it then all the work is worth it." You hold back an adoring grin, biting on your trembling lip so painfully that you try to grip at the cloudy purple water. He's kind and you just feel so special. "How was work?" he asks, redirecting the conversation.

"Ugh," you deflate at the thought, twirling a daisy stem into Jaemin's hair distractedly. He accepts it with a cute smile. "I was assigned to sort out bills in the afternoon so my neck and shoulders are killing me. I never want to look down again." Your neck tilts back with the words and there is a small pop in your neck, bones cracking grossly to show Jaemin just how awful it has actually gotten.

"Oh, baby, do you want a massage for that?" Jaemin's not the best as massages, hands always a little too gentle and wandering with soft touches rather than helping to release stress. Yet you accept anyway, absolutely lovestruck that he'd even offer after all he's done to set up the bathroom alone.

His hands awkwardly twist around your shoulders, the angle of the bathtub not leaving much room for his arms to be properly placed. The tips of fingers meet your shoulders first, pushing in awkwardly to try and undo the knots in your muscles after a long day. God, does he suck at this.

"Thanks, Jaemin," you whisper, genuine and appreciative.

Receiving Gifts

Everything always seems to remind Jaemin of you; planned or spontaneous, big or small, expensive or cheap, bought or handmade. The feeling of a fluttering heart never fleets when the man offers you a gift, his adoration for you held in the palms of his hands, ready to be taken by your own.

Sometimes the amount he offers is concerning, both because of how empty his wallet is getting and in exchange, how much space is it all taking up. The bathroom drawers are filled with lipsticks and eyeshadows Jaemin wanted to see you in, the sink right above it with two rubber ducks in matching scarves that he'd bought because "look! They're just like us. Duck couple!" The wardrobe is getting packed and packed with every new shirt the man buys for you, knowing that you've been looking for something like that for a while now. The jar is going to overflow soon, rocks that Jaemin collected by the seaside all packed for a mix of colour and texture through the glass.

"Y/n!" he calls out, the tone of voice familiar, the same eager excitement of a child getting ready to show their parents a painting they did in class today. His footsteps pad up loudly, practically stomping as he sprints, and you turn around to a familiar sight.

Jaemin stands tall, not at all affected by the running, with strong shoulders and hands behind his back suspiciously. You pretend to be clueless, wouldn't want to ruin a surprise after all. "Yes?" you reply, fond but unaware.

He becomes overjoyed by your unknowing attitude, heels bouncing up and down in an animated manner as he does his best to hold back the giant grin growing on his lips. He fails miserably, obviously. If holding the gift behind his back wasn't enough, Jaemin's eyes always glow in an overjoyed thrill when giving you something, curious of your reaction. "Guess what I got you."

He's practically shining, glimmering with the way he's staring up at you with stars spinning around his head. "You got me something?" you chirp, lifting yourself happily and trying to take a peek behind the boy's shoulder. Jaemin, like always, dodges your advance and takes a step back, a playful smirk on his face when he shakes his head with a click of his tongue.

"No peeking," he bites his tongue, "I said guess."

You blank at him, blinking with absent eyes before grunting out a "no."

Jaemin gives up easily, shoulders drooping down before he rolls his eyes. Through a wistful smile, he mumbles, "I got this for you."

This is the same too, his timidity whenever actually giving it to you, regressing into a shy attitude once the time for your reaction comes around. It's probably when he's most anxious in your relationship. His feet fall flat and he watches with curled shoulders as you gape at the tiny cupcake that finds its way from behind his back.

It's red velvet in a white paper liner and pink hearts iced all over top. "It's adorable," you peep, bending down to get a closer look before taking into your own grasp first, "this is for me?"

"Well I was hoping we would share," he chuckles, "but yes, I bought them with you in mind."

The cake is room temperature in your fingers, feeling like butter as you peel off the wrapper. "That's so sweet of you," you gush, looking back up at Jaemin feeling like you're about to burst.

"There's more." He rushes back to the hallway and bends down for a small white box that you hadn't noticed before, too distracted by the singular cake that Jaemin originally approached you with. It's cardboard with a silk red bow wrapped around the handle, draping down the prism with romantic waves. You almost want to keep the box too. There are all sorts of red velvet cupcakes, all the same paper but with different rises, sprinkles, icing patterns, and colours.

They're too sweet to eat.

Quality Time

Jaemin is busy. Extremely so. Stressfully so. Any time he has to himself are balanced halves dedicated to you and sleeping. Sometimes you feel like a burden, always taking up every second he isn't working, time he could be using to unwind alone, but he insists.

Jaemin pushes that he loves to be with you, even when he's too emotionally drained to chat or stressed to even be touched, Jaemin accompanies you. It's the small walks together to the SM building before late night practice or the new restaurant he's wanted to try in Itaewon. He's around.

"I'm sorry we didn't watch the one you wanted," you apologise yet again, kicking at the footpath sadly with your hands folded behind your back. The movie you begged profusely to see was definitely not at all what you thought it'd be and now, regretful, you realise that maybe that comedic drama Jaemin originally took you out for might've been the better option.

"I already told you to not be," he groans playfully, knocking his shoulder into your own until you stumble at the edge of the footpath, toeing onto the road before hopping back up to push him aside in retaliation.

"I wasted your time though," you sigh, solemn again. The sound on Jaemin's feet on cement pause and you look up from your own shoes to see him standing behind you, arms crossed and lips in a pout. You rush to explain yourself, panicked by his displeasing expression, "we just don't know when you're going to be free next so the only time we had was used stupidly…"

Jaemin stands stoic, unmoving, until you slow yourself down and he softens at your shy purse of lips. "Don't be sorry," he begins, moving into your personal space with a reassuring tug of lips, murmuring, "any time spent with you is enjoyable, I love being with you, don't ever feel guilty, okay?"

You worry at your lip, eyes darting around the cinema's screens to observe every other movie's showing times. Jaemin frowns even deeper at this, taking your silence badly and brushing a delicate thumb down your jaw to grab your attention.

Holding eye contact, stare holding so much intent, Jaemin repeats, "okay?"

A shaky sigh runs out your chest but Jaemin is pleased, dropping his hand to grin down at you encouragingly, patient. "Okay," you chuckle, awkward but just as happy with yourself as he is.

"Now let's go to the arcade, I'm not done with you yet."

Physical Touch

Jaemin loves to touch everyone. His friends, family, strangers, and especially you. It's his encouraging pats on the backs in place of 'good job', his hugs that make you forget the entirety of anything that isn't his hold. It's his delicate kisses on the cheek that light up anyone's mood, teasing yet loving all the same. His hands are always everywhere, it's always weird to see Jaemin on his own, not connected with another.

His hands are always wandering, finding home on any bareskin they can find, bare or under fabric. The touch is warm most days, other than when it's dry and cold outside, his fingertips taking on the temperature, but otherwise Jaemin's hands are clammy and rough, padding against your skin gently.

"Hey!" Jaemin yells, kicking at Donghyuck, who had slid into the seat next to you right before your boyfriend could. They bicker over the spot, pushing at one another like children until Renjun cuts them off in annoyance, shoving the youngest to the front seat with a curt glare.

"It's okay, Nana," you pout, leaning toward the passenger seat with a reassuring smile. Your fingers tug at his sleeve lovingly, twirling the fabric around your thumb and watching it fall loose before Jeno politely asks you to buckle up already. "We can sit together on the way back."

There wasn't anything to be lost, his shoulder is probably cramped from reaching into the backseat the entire car trip, holding onto your own outstretched hand or your ankle, fingers dipping into the cuff of your jeans tenderly. Only thing more he needed was to lay on your shoulder on the drive home.

Kisses of all kinds are Jaemin's thing, he puckers his lips, all ugly and chapped, before leaning in with mischievous eyes to pepper any surface of skin with kisses. It's especially dreadful when he's just gotten his makeup done, tacky lip tints and glosses pressing marks of pink and glitter.

"Y/n! Come here," Jaemin waves his hands at you, calling you over to his vanity in the waiting room as the details of his hair get fixed for the second performance recording. His skin gleams grossly with sweat but he smiles so purely with so much affection that you can't help but approach the man with a mirrored look of adoration. It's hard to not ruffle his hair when he peers up at you cutely, the stylist pulling away until his head is facing the right way again.

You think of complimenting his performance but bite your tongue. Today isn't a praising sort of day for you and Jaemin. "What's up," you reply off handedly, tapping Jeno on the arm as he walks by to send the other man a thumbs up. He receives the gesture with a curt nod before going to get his own clothes fixed up.

Jaemin clicks his tongue and reaches for your hand, your fingertips now mildly damp from Jeno's own sweat, before pulling it up to his lips to place a small, sticky kiss. A small line is left on your knuckles, sheer red with silver glitter, and you cringe at the sight, internally melting at his sudden affections. Your boyfriend's lips tug up proudly before his hand weaves into yours silently, humming along to their song that plays in the background as your locked fingers settle on the arm of his chair.

Renjun steals Jaemin's attention from across the room but his thumb rubs along your pointer, gentle and present.

#jaemin #jaemin x reader #jaemin fluff #jaemin fanfic #nct #nct x reader #nct fluff #nct fanfic #nct dream #nct dream x reader #nct dream fluff #nct dream fanfic

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thefanficmonster · 3 years

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Never Satisfied [Chapter 2]

Corpse Husband x Original Female Character

Warnings: Language

Collaboration between Vy & Ashens 🖤

“this chick is crazy...and I kinda dig it“

It’s been four days since the incident and he’s all but forgotten about it, removed it from his memory entirely as if girls hide from police in his car on a regular basis.

Today is colder than usual, and his body has been quick to respond to the change, aching around the joints. Some days it’s impossible to move, feeling his clothes and sandpaper and housing spikes as joints. Thankfully, today isn’t that bad, the pain is rather manageable. Which checks out well for him, considering he has to do some cleaning around his apartment. His skin itched at the sight of the mess his living space has become over the last few weeks he hasn’t been bothered to pick up the strewn about items or wash the dishes in the sink.

Standing in his living room, he turns in a circle, taking in the disaster that is surrounding him. His chest tightens, throat closing up due to the overwhelmingness of the work he has ahead of him while all he wants to do is hide in his room, under the blankets of his bed that is for sure not willing to offer him much comfort at the moment, seeing as how it too is a mess.

Forget about that! He isn’t sure if his mind is telling him to forget the task he has at hand or the comfort he has in mind. Either way, he knows what the right thing to do is. It may give him anxiety, but it has to be done.

He clenches his jaw and closes his eyes, taking deep measured breaths and exhaling slowly just like his doctor had instructed him to do, in hopes to ease the tension around his lungs.

Calming down a bit, he finally decides to get on with it, starting with the smallest space he has to clean, hoping accomplishing a small victory would fuel his ambition to move onto the actual rooms with a lesser struggle. So, pulling on his favorite hoodie and a beanie over his black curls, he slips out of the front door and down the stairs of his apartment complex with a trash bag in hand. He may hate cleaning, but he hates messes more, therefore it’s an easy call to make. Easy when putting the two in comparison, a struggle when he actually has to get on with the process of cleaning.

With a deep breath as a final ‘You got this’ before action, he unlocks his car doors and looks around its interior. He starts off with the junk in the front - first tending to the passenger seat where he finds a couple plastic bags and a few water bottles. He keeps the area around the driver’s seat clean as can be, so he skips that side. Unfortunately, now he has to turn to the nightmare that is the backseats.

While it may be tame, compared to most, the three paper bags, five disposable coffee cups that he’d dropped to the floor are more than enough to annoy him. He also makes a frustrating find of a hoodie, a few shirts, a hat, and what appears to be a forgotten CVS bag of medication. Much to his dismay, there’s more: handfuls of old receipts that he is now shoving into the garbage bag he has in hand along with straw wrappers, a few stray cold fries dating back to God-knows-when. He sighs, somewhat relieved to see the backseat is doing a lot better now than it was a couple minutes ago, though it’s not even entirely clean just yet. Something catches his eye though - a choker that was probably covered by one of the clothing items he had found. He picks it up, turning it over in his hand. It’s made of soft leather with a gunmetal ”C” and a pentagram embossed on it. It has a leather braided cord on both ends to tie together and no price tag or brand to indicate its origin. He can’t remember buying this...but then again, retail therapy is a thing and it wouldn’t be the first time he forgot a purchase. He gives it one final once-over before shrugging and pocketing it. After collecting the headphones he’d also dumped in the back and retrieving a pair of boots from the trunk, he locks up his car and heads back into the building, mentally preparing himself for facing the terror of cleaning his apartment.

Returning to his place after tossing the trash in the dumpster along the way, Corpse locks the front door behind him and proceeds to drop the things he’s brought back near the front door.

This defeats the purpose of cleaning up in the first place, Corpse. He scolds himself but that’s what it remains at - just a scold. He slips the hoodie off his torso, but pauses when the leather collar falls to the floor. Tossing the clothing item on a dining room chair behind him, he picks up the choker and, without as much as a second thought, places it around his throat just below his Adam’s apple The metal feels cool against his skin and as he ties the leather cords at the back of his neck the corners of his lips curve upwards just a little.

I probably look stupid. He thinks to himself. Corpse tries not to look much at his own reflection, mostly because it’s a reminder of how little sleep he gets with the dark circles and worn out, exhausted eyes staring back at him whenever he looks. But when he catches a glimpse of himself in his peripheral on his way to piss, he admires his reflection, or more so the way the black leather stands out across his pale skin. He’s gotta admit, it looks pretty cool. Edgy. Very urban. Goth maybe? But he still prefers the chains he’s known to wear over chokers.

After doing his business, he starts heading toward his office with the intention of recording a new story for his channel if he manages to find a decent submission - and also to ignore the cleaning he still had to do eventually - when the sound of someone banging on the door of his neighbor’s apartment makes him jump, thinking the sound was coming from his door instead. Being the nosey bitch he is, he creeps to his door, listening to the muffled and almost completely incomprehensible voices from across the hall. The screaming match taking place is making him rather nervous and anxious and as much as he’d rather hide in his room and pretend he never heard or saw anything, he also doesn’t want the altercation to escalate into anything physical.

“You fucking bailed on me!” An angry female shout dominates over the other voice, a male one, that’s quick to follow the previous example with the tone volume.

“You almost got caught, it's not my fault you screwed up!” It’s the male’s turn to shout, his words intriguing Corpse.

Got caught? Screwed up what?

“Fuck you! You don’t just ditch like that! That’s such a dick move!”

Ditched? If it wasn’t for the ‘getting caught’ part I would’ve thought it was a flopped date?

“I wasn’t about to get arrested for your klepto ass! I’m done with your shit!” The male voice takes the upper hand again, and though the female attempts to speak, she’s promptly cut off by the male, “No! No, I said I’m fucking done! Get the fuck out of my apartment!” A loud bang that sounded remarkably like a chair being flipped over made Corpse jump again with his thoughts once again racing to try and make sense of the situation.

Klepto? So she’s a thief. Great. He rolls his eyes, not that he needed a reminder that he lives in a bad neighborhood, but he sure got it. He inhales slowly, finally deciding to check the aftermath in the hallway. Again, it isn’t his business whatsoever, but he can’t rest easy until he knows there isn’t an injured person outside his door right now. He peeks out the peephole before unlocking the door and sticking his head out to see a long haired individual still standing in front of his neighbor’s door. They have their back turned to him and are getting prepared to start banging on the door once again.

“Little scared-ass bitch! I’ll be back for my shit!” She screams, kicking the door to punctuate her point.

This chick is absolutely nuts. Everything in his gut is telling him to turn around and go back inside but his brain’s less-rational side is convincing him to check on her. He carefully steps into the hallway, swallowing nervously as he reaches out to tap her shoulder. “Are um-...you okay?”

The girl whips around, a furious expression on her face. Corpse makes a pause, his eyes widening at the sight of that familiar face.

Holy shit, I know this girl.

Standing in front of him is the girl who leaped into the backseat of his car only a few days ago.

Shit! What are the odds?

She’s wearing a pair of black skinny jeans and a cropped sweatshirt with the quote “Mercury’s in Gatorade or Some Shit” written in bold letters and a solar system around it, with a leather jacket on top.

His mouth dries when he makes a realization...

Oh fuck. She’s way prettier in the natural light instead of that ugly light I saw her in that night.

“Oh hey! Parking lot guy! What are y-...is that my choker?” She interrupts herself, looking closer at the black leather on his pale skin, her brows furrowing. He’d forgotten he was even wearing it to be honest, but she seems to recognize it. “That’s my fucking choker, dude! I’ve been looking everywhere for it!” She reaches up seemingly with the intention of taking it off him, causing his whole body to freeze up.

Finally finding his senses, Corpse takes half a step back, eyes slightly widened, “Woah, hey! Easy there, I’m pretty sure I bought this.” He warns, hands hesitantly held out in front of himself to try and create some distance between them.

She seems not to take the hint at his desire for personal space as she reaches out again, stepping closer. “No, I made it with my own two hands, man! It’s got a C on it for my name - Cora.” She says sharply to the point of anger that honestly frightens him a bit.

He quickly unties the leather straps, removing it from his neck. However, he refuses to give it back so easily as he holds it up out of her reach.

Maybe if it isn’t on me she won’t be all up in his personal space. Yeah, it’s a bit evil, but he didn’t care. Besides, part of him is still mad about the fact she used his car as a hiding spot, shooting his anxiety through the roof in the process.

“I feel like you owe me for those fries you stole last time we saw each other. Make it up to me and I’ll give it back. If it’s even yours, that is...” He says, brows furrowing slightly and eyes narrowing as he takes another step back. “And, you know, for nearly getting me busted by the police for something I wasn’t even a part of.”

Sure, he was talking but her eyes are wandering analyzing him: first the silver chains around his neck that glimmer in the light and his dark hair, strands dangling carelessly as a curtain over his face.

He too finds himself admiring her, memorizing her features better in this light. She has olive skin and sports a little bit of a tan. Stray locks of wavy dark brown hair hang around her ears having come loose from her messy bun. She has earthy brown eyes with flecks of green that he can’t help but stare at, despite their current sharpness. Her right arm is decorated with a few small tattoos: a skull of some sort of animal that appears to be puking flowers; a small cartoon t-rex floating via many colorful balloons and a brain with a spiky spiral in the center of it. She has a single line drawn around her pinky finger on the hand of the other arm and the shadowy silhouette of a forest around her wrist. However, the one thing Corpse could see better than all of that, was she is pissed.

“Gimme my fucking choker back! I paid you for those fries, it’s not my fault you spent them on douchebag lessons!” She snaps, hopping to try and grab his arm.

She is pressed up against him now, a wave of perfume hitting him when she attempts another jump. He holds the choker higher, maybe even subconsciously, just enjoying the warm presence of another body for as long as possible - not that he’d admit that.

Corpse’s brief content comes crashing down as he stumbles backwards when he feels something hard on his hip and her hands grabbing at the front of his shirt.

“Wait-“ He tries to say, but is cut off when a good amount of weight pulls at his jeans. “Oh Fuck!” He rasps out, dropping the choker as he slams onto the floor. In the split second he spared to take a breath, his pants had been yanked down to his knees and his neck was crooked up against his door. He’s now lying on the floor as the girl hovers over him having landed with her hand on top of his head and one leg over his chest while the other is pinning his arm down.

While remaining unmoving under the girl, he takes a moment to let the previous five seconds sink in before replaying them in his mind:

This small woman, Cora she said her name was, had put the boot clad toes of her left foot into the pocket of his baggy jeans to use as a stepping stool. In turn, they were shoved down, effectively pantsing him and tearing the pocket before knocking them both to the floor.

Corpse leans against his door, jeans still around his knees, hair a mess as he watches Cora stand up from where she’d practically tackled him and equip the choker.

“Serves you right.” She sticks her tongue out, tying the piece of jewelry behind her neck. “Now get up before someone calls the cops, we both know what happens then.” She rolls her eyes and bends down, offering her hands to help him up after he situated his trousers.

“Ah-um...I-...” anxiety started reigning in his chest and head as he realized everything that had happened. He takes both her hands and she uses all her weight to pull him up. Her pull was so strong that when he stood up, he had to hold her tight to keep her from falling back. He stabilizes her, maybe a little too hard because her chest collides with his. He apologizes under his breath, releasing her hands quickly. “Don’t people buy dinner first before yanking off their pants?” He snorts, trying to make light of the situation and crossing his arms over his chest. “But then again, you stole my dinner.”

“Are you insinuating I should take off my pants?” She asks with a smirk.

Corpse nearly chokes on his own inhale, eyes wide as he quickly looks away.

Oh my god is she serious? “N-no!” He says, perhaps too quickly. Too loudly. His cheeks turned dark pink as he gapes at her for a moment before furrowing his brows again. He hunches his shoulders a little, doing his best to avoid those sharp hazel eyes.

She’s pretty. Way too pretty for him and now she has him all flustered. This girl has way too much power over the agoraphobic anxiety bundle that is Corpse.

“Oh so you’re insinuating that I should buy you dinner since I took off your pants?” She prompts, eyes narrowing with a delighted little smirk on her face. She has to be enjoying watching him squirm in embarrassment, otherwise, why would she keep asking questions like that? Of course she does. She is like every other girl in his life.

“I’m..-just...Forget it.” He mumbles, shrinking back away from her as he turns to go back inside the safety of his apartment.

She’s probably making fun of me. Great, as if I didn’t have enough self-esteem issues already.

Before he could get inside, a hand grabs his shirt at the small of his back. “Hey, I’m just fucking with you, dude.” She says, giving the shirt’s fabric a tug.

He turns and looks at her with wary eyes, wondering if she was trying to goad him into falling for her taunting again. But the ice in her gaze has melted and she gives him a crooked smile. “Lemme buy you dinner to pay you back. It’s the least I can do after you helped keep my ass out of jail.” She releases his shirt after a brief moment of reluctance and then offers her hand to him for a handshake. “Oh, I should introduce myself, officially this time. I’m Cora.”

Corpse looks at her hand and carefully takes it. She has small hands and his long fingers practically engulfed hers as he shakes it lightly. He gives her his name in return and she smiles that light filled, beaming smile he remembers from the car.

“Nice to, um- meet you, I guess.” He finds himself staring at her, unknowingly still holding her hand in his until she looks up and grins a little wider.

“This seems like a roundabout way to hold my hand, bro. You could have just asked,you know.” She teases, but this time it felt okay, his embarrassment having faded slightly, but he still hurries to look away and release his hold on her.

Corpse murmurs a quick apology, but before he could stick his hand back into the ripped pocket of his jeans, she takes hold of it again, tugging him forward. “Come on, lock your door. I’ll buy you something to eat. You drive though.” She lets go of his hand after a moment and, much to his surprise, he catches himself missing the warmth that it provided him while it was there. Turning, he ducked into his apartment to grab his hoodie and keys, feeling suddenly thankful he’d cleaned his car out.

Taglist: @vixenl @fockingwhore

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courtteeno · 2 years

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Course Post #9: The End of the Internet

This week, after reading The Private Eye: Volume One, I have been thinking a lot about what would happen if The Cloud burst and if the Internet was no longer a thing. How different would life be? Would it be a good change or a bad change?

Image from The Private Eye: Volume One

One thing that I can’t stop thinking about is how great it would affect everyone that’s lived through these past few years. When the pandemic started in 2020, our lives suddenly shifted online. No more going to work, school, or out to see friends. If you wanted to escape the traumatic reality of a virus taking over the world, you had to escape online.

Personally throughout the pandemic, my online libraries have expanded. I started buying books to read on my Kindle app, I bought new video games to connect with my friends online, and I paid for The Lord of the Rings movie trilogy so I could escape our reality to a fantasy one. To change my reality, I expanded the number of things I own online. Many other people have done the same to change their realities as well throughout the pandemic.

Now, if the cloud did burst, what would happen to all of these things? Goodbye to all the novels I read on the Kindle app, no more video games, and The Lord of the Rings would vanish from my movie library. Suddenly, several people that purchased things online to survive through the pandemic would lose all of their reality-changing material.

To some people this thought may be comforting, no more internet to distract ourselves. But to others, this is terrifying. Suddenly, we are losing the online objects we poured hours of our lives into to comfort us during troubling times.

On top of this, we probably couldn’t even get physical copies of these items. According to Geoffrey Morrison, in “You Don’t Really Own the Digital Movies You Buy,” we don’t even own the online content we purchase. When we buy things online, we purchase the digital rights to use them, not the actual content. Additionally, when you own something, you can sell or redistribute that item as you please. I can sell any of my old DVDs in a garage sale today if I wanted to. However, you can’t sell any digital content you own. Without physically owning it, and only having the digital rights, it means that almost any digital content you own is not yours.

While it’s unlikely that we’ll lose access to everything we’ve bought online these past few years, it’s definitely possible. The Private Eye has made me wonder: do I need to start buying physical copies of what I want? Is the implication of only buying physical objects, rather than digital, worse for our world? (Would it change the environment for the worse or the space we have? Or would it create more jobs?) These answers are up to the future to decide.

“So, no, you don’t own your digital files, and theoretically you could at some point be prevented from watching or listening to them. In reality, your digital collection is probably safe for the foreseeable future—but if the very idea of a company locking you out of your movies and music makes you angry, we suggest embracing physical media such as 4K Blu-rays and CDs, which will likely survive any digital-media apocalypse.” - Geoffrey Morrison in “You Don’t Really Own the Digital Movies You Buy”

Image from https://unsplash.com/photos/EOQhsfFBhRk

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demonslayedher · 3 years

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Your content on Kny is interesting, being a Kny fan I would like to share a cusiority. During the final battle did you notice that the Hashira were passive about the death of some? When Shinobu died only Tanjiro had a reaction because of how busy he was; Mitsuri didn't seem sad and when Iguro remembered who died in the middle of the final battle he didn't even mention her. What did you think? It would have been nice if Gotouge had shown us what the Hashira's thought when the others died

[cont.] I'm the anonymous person who asked you the question about the Hashira who fell in the fight, Tumblr makes people write very little. Apart from Tanjiro they seemed cold to me, even for Tokito; the only one affected was Himejima; when always Iguro mentioned him during the clash with Muzan it was like he was thinking normally. There wasn't time to mourn for the dead but I was expecting a slightly deeper reaction. Anyway for Shinobu yes there was Inosuke and Kanao but the pillars are important too

Thank you for the Ask, time to get into it! This served as a good excuse to flip back through of a lot of the later volumes... or rather, a huge chunk of the series. Short Answer: I don’t think Mitsuri knew about Shinobu’s death. Longer Answer: A walk-through of the Pillars’ situations in the final showdown and a partial analysis of Kimetsu-style story pacing.

Disclaimer: I finished this around 2am. I chose to leave it rambling and unedited and typo-ridden. HAVE MY FEELS, I’M DISHING THEM.

(Disclaimer: This isn’t meant to be a plug for my own fics, but since they are born out of my emotional experience of canon, mentions will make their way in. U fu fu.) First, absolutely yes on there being no time to mourn. From the moment the Ubuyashiki Mansion blows up in volume 16 to the actual end of the fighting in volume 23, that is one hell of a night; this final arc(s) had NO CHILL. Like, wow. It’s been a long time since I followed another battle-driven manga, but that seems like a lot, especially for a relatively short series. And I was initially happy to dismiss all the lack of satisfying sadness as being due to the fact that they are in *PANIC MODE* and entirely focused on fighting, but that is also not necessarily the case; they do come off slightly cold. I want to touch a bit on what we want to see the characters mourn each other, but also why I think it works out a bit better that we didn’t; from a purely narrative standpoint. LET THEM BE SAD: Parasocial Needs Science says we form bonds with fictional characters that affect our brains in very similar and impactful ways, so our feelings are legit when they get killed off. It affects us like a breakup or other goodbye and makes us crave closure. As for my own assumptions, we look for proxy characters in-universe to give those characters we love the attention we wish to; their sadness validates our sadness, watching them get emotional can be super cathartic, and a good mourning arc can provide satisfying closure. This is something we got with Rengoku, canonically loved by like, everyone. Hell, even the guy who killed him was sad. Just to rub salt into it, the most recent fanbook that includes a section about how the Pillars see each other, and it drives home that even if we never saw much or any canon interaction between him and any other given character, they’re all like, “Oh yeah, Rengoku, he’s a great guy.” And, he’s the only character we really get space to mourn, pacing-wise. First, because of when it happens in the plot, this gives the story time to show us each and everyone one of the Pillars hearing the news; it gives them times to process it (which Tokitou clearly needed), and most of us, it takes us in depth through how it affects Tanjirou, our main character whose emotions that we, the readers, are most in touch with. Rengoku got star treatment in the way he was mourned, and we readers get to lap that up. So then when we don’t get that in-universe star mourning treatment, it does feel a bit jarring by comparison. Gotouge did say she was sorry to hurt everyone, but these are the conditions the little humans were up against all along and a point driven home again and again; even with power on par with demons through the attainment of a mark; even Pillars are just breakable humans who will never be able to regenerate like demons can, hence why their stakes are so much higher in every battle they go into. Furthermore, the Pillars are more ready for this than anyone else, they of all the characters would be the best at keeping their emotions in check in the heat of a battle. Which means they had to keep them in check for seven volumes of near constant battle, love it or hate it. KIMETSU LOGIC: The Writing Sins That Make This Manga What It Is I could go on and on and on and on about the writing sins this manga commits and how it shows that it’s Gotouge’s first time writing something of this length. In manga not all of it can be blamed on the author alone because the editors have a very significant influence, but yeah, this is not the most amazingly crafted story out there, by a long shot. Would I change any of it, though? Well, a few things, yes, of course, out of personal preference. But on the whole, no. It’s the collective errors that stamp KnY with its style and make it what it is, and I find it as endearing as all the randomly super goofy art. Now, when it comes to the lack of Pillars reacting to new of each others’ deaths, I wouldn’t necessarily classify that itself as a fault, and if I were Gotouge’s editor, I probably would have encouraged her to keep it to a minimum too. After all, I would be considered with selling a new shot of tension with every week’s installment to keep any readers from getting bored with the constant battle. And dang it, THAT TENSION WAS HIGH, those battles were remarkably emotional and tense through and through. The breaks in tension that we got were necessarily and not distracting, with the notable exception of Iguro’s past. That was clumsy placement. I’ll be honest, I didn’t bond with Iguro as much as a character because he lost his earlier chances to be appealing to me, and by the time the chapter with his flashback came out, I DIDN’T CARE, I waited anxiously all week to see what was happening to Tanjiro and was invested enough to have an appetite for the additional Sumiyoshi and Yoriichi bits, but dang it, Snake Pillar was getting in the way of what my emotions were primed for at that point. But, such is the way of fickle weekly readers; with THAT MUCH tension going on, readers crave a little breather here and there with a look at who else might taking in a breather in a flashback. We got bits and pieces of that mostly through flashback, like Tamayo’s memories of conversation with Shinobu experienced in real time through Muzan, as well as in-real-time moments with the characters having very slight chances to catch their breath (no pun intended). But, how well those breaths worked depending on each character, and how the readers’ emotions were getting slammed week to week. Just like how I as a weekly reader (by that point) had no appetite for an Iguro flashback while eager to move forward, there likewise would have been limited appetite for mourning, and we’re stuck with who we got as proxy characters to react through. ACTION, REACTION: The Rhythm of Basic Writing Advice It has often been said that in writing, something should happen in a scene, and the next scene should be a reaction to it. In the next scene something new happens, and likewise, there is a reaction. We could also thing of this as stages within the same scene, like the part when the music changes or the moment the battle has ended but we’re still on the battlefield. In Rengoku’s case, we got one big happening, and then a whole lot of reaction drizzled through the story after that. In the Infinity Fortress case, we get a big happening with the Ubuyashiki Mansion blowing up and then--a big happening!--a big happening!--a big happening--! A--uh oh, there’s a reactio---NEVERMIND, THINGS ARE STILL HAPPENING, GOTOUGE, PLEASE, THIS HURTS, OW, OW, HOW ARE YOU SO CRUEL, WE GET IT, THIS SITUATION IS AWFUL, PLEASE STOP HURTING THEM---

The reactions are there, scattered throughout. They’re short, but they sure make themselves count. While Tanjirou is our Empathy Personified hero, it’s natural that we get more of his reactions, but the lack of them in other characters is, I would say, a natural fault of having a huge cast to work with it. Once you start dragging too many other characters into the reactions, the actions have trouble moving forward, and with the level of seven volumes worth of tension it’s the actions that keep readers hooked and buying magazines. THEY’RE ONLY CORVIDS, OK: Now We’re Actually Looking At Canon Details Now that all being said, although it’s easy to dismiss a lot of Kimetsu Logic as amateurish at first, on further reflection, the little worldbuilding logic does excuse itself for not plunging each of the characters into a period of reaction to actions happening elsewhere. Not all the birds had Yushiro’s papers. Not all birds were created equal. It’s really hard to navigate that place. Ergo, communication was probably highly imperfect; not all the crows knew everything going on. We don’t feel that as readers because we’re seeing Kiriya and his sisters get all the available communications. In Iguro and Mitsuri’s case in particular, I suspect that might not even had been Mitsuri’s crow (as that one has a distinct personality and accessory) giving her orders to gather where Muzan is. It was probably any old down-to-business crow working with the information it had as clearly as it could in the battle that was most difficult to physically navigate. If Mitsuri’s crow (named Urara in the most recent fanbook) had been there, I imagine she’d have been having difficulty that whole time to even stay within a close range of that battle. Furthermore, a crow like that with a strong bond with Mitsuri might had also judged that telling her about Shinobu’s death was a dangerous distraction, and chosen to withhold information. The fanbook specifies that Iguro’s crow Yuuan was the one who told him about how Tokitou got a red blade (in fact, this is basically the only thing said of this crow besides its name and gender). To able to report in such detail that Iguro could analyze that Tokitou attained the red blade by the strength of his grip, that probably quite an accomplishment to have either witnessed that much, or to pass on crucial information that detailed and quickly. At that time, Iguro and Mitsuri were physically separated and she was distracted by the crow giving her orders to gather where Muzan was, so she might not even have overheard that Tokitou had died. As for Iguro, the second fanbook tells us that because Tokitou was young he had hoped he wouldn’t die. There was no opportunity to mourn him, and they weren’t close enough for that to throw him off much from battle, but on a Pillar to Pillar level, I think the amount of thought Iguro did dedicated to Tokitou showed a certain level of esteem for him and regret at this passing. What would have been nice? Maybe a little look over his shoulder to Mitsuri like “I hope she didn’t hear that.” That would have revealed a tender side of Iguro in a very short use of panels. I want to come back to analyzing Mitsuri’s reaction later, so let’s keep focusing on the loss of Tokitou. Once he attained more of his sense of self back, it seems he preferred the company of Corp Members closed to him in age (if we go by his little flashbacks, which in true Kimetsu Logic, are things we didn’t know about until they come up in flashbacks). Most of the Pillars weren’t especially close with him, even if they did care about his wellbeing, as they seemed particular aware of how young he was. Sanemi probably had never interacted much with Tokitou until that battle, and *OKAY, HERE IT IS, THE UPCOMING FANFIC SELF-PLUG* one of the things I really liked working with in my post-canon fic is that there’s a point at which thinking about Tokitou forces Sanemi to deal with all the trauma he’s buried from that battle. I figure it would hit him later; he had a good excuse of a distraction. Ugh. Man. My heart hurts again thinking of that chapter. Let’s also not forget, after Himejima showed his respects for Tokitou both quickly and sincerely, he couldn’t allow Sanemi to deal with Genya’s death until after everything was over. All the Pillars had to think like this. What would had been nice? I liked this reaction scene to two simultaneous and horrific deaths exactly as it was. Ow. Ahhhh. Owwwwww, it’s hurting again. This is catharsis exactly the way I like it. Let’s keep going with Himejima, the only one to have known to expect all this, and who stayed ready and likely hoped to bring down Muzan all by himself without any other sacrifices (welp, so much for that). There’s a scene in the novels that implies he had some idea that Shinobu wasn’t intending to make it out of the upcoming battle(s) alive, and I imagine he felt the same regret and bitter acceptance in advance that he also felt with Ubuyashiki. If we heard the news about Shinobu like Tanjirou and Giyuu did, I imagine he was hurt but it wouldn’t have been noticeable, and he probably would not be surprised even at how quickly it happened. What would had been nice? Anything. Just a “How pitiful” and some tears as he runs through the halls woulda’ been great. So since Giyuu did hear it loud and clear with Tanjirou, I first want to point out that whether that was Tanjirou’s crow or not (might not had been, because his crow was busy with a letter delivery from Senjurou at the time too), that crow must had loved to shared details; maybe even details that were not necessary. Like, would telling the lower level Corp members everything really help? Wouldn’t the loss of each Pillar make them lose their nerve? Was it because that crow was wearing one of Yushiro’s papers that it had to report extra detail for Ubuyashiki HQ? Whatever the case, Giyuu is initially shocked about Shinobu and then is like, “what is that paper the crow has? It sure is reporting things fast.” What would have been nice? ANYTHING MORE THAN ONE PANEL OF SHOCK. Come on, Giyuu, give the GiyuuShino shippers S O M E T H I N G. Granted, if Tanjirou had been killed in battle with Akaza, I believe Giyuu would have had an initial outburst of emotion, but then gotten himself under control real quick and stayed that way until it was safe to break down (which he did immediately later on, since the threat was gone--but he was just as soon picking up a sword and stabbing him, so again, Pillar-mode must come before experiencing emotions). I interpret canon as that even though Giyuu might had found it easily to address Shinobu in conversation due to frequency in how much they had conversed and the fact that she would usually talk to him first, he would never had considered himself especially close with her (since he never saw himself close with any of the Pillars). I feel their relationship had potential to grow closer if Giyuu had actually gone out of his way to communicate more with her, and he probably would had if they both survived, but at the time she died he probably still felt a distance, which is why it did him harder when Tanjirou--someone who Giyuu did actually get to a point of enjoying conversation with--was dead right in front of him. (Side not, oh man, OH MAN, being a weekly reader was so tough then. I still have so many emotions from that week. Oh man. Oof. Ouch.)

Of note, Giyuu had the best opportunity for reflection on a comrade’s death since he had enough recovery time once he woke up to build a fire and treat wounds, and Tanjirou took that chance to read a letter.

What would have been nice? AGAIN, GIYUU, ANYTHING, but after that battle I think he deserved to disassociate a bit. Also of note, I don’t know that they had complete information either, because NO ONE (by “no one” I mean Tanjirou and Inosuke) seemed to hear anything about Zenitsu single-handedly killing Upper Moon Six and surviving it. What would had been nice: “Good for you, Zenitsu, I hope you’re okay” or “Six? Again? Didn’t we already do that? There was a third??” or “well I got Upper Moon Two SO THERE” or “..........are you sure?” or even way, way after all is said and done, off in epilogue times, “you fought WHO by YOURSELF???” but I digress. Now back to Shinobu, losing her so early on in this marathon of high-stakes battles made her death seem forever ago by the time we got to another Pillar death. It would had been nice for more of them to react both with “no, not Shinobu!” and “we are in deep trouble” sort of ways. That made the glimpses we got of her in flashback feel way, way more nostalgic, since for our experiences as readers, she had already been gone a very long time. I like that the battle with Douma got stretched over so long a span of the manga, they really showed the stakes in how difficult of a foe he was, even if that battle was itself was relatively shorter than others. And as stand-ins for the readers to mourn Shinobu, I love how we got that both through Kanao and through Inosuke. But yes, it sure would had been nice to get something from... Mitsuri. Now, if I had only read the events of canon, manga chapter to manga chapter, and even the Taisho Secrets, I still never would have guessed that Shinobu and Mitsuri had such a warm friendship. I know this purely from the fanbooks and novels, and that is something I find a writing error that detracts a lot from the work. Some of the most apt criticism I’ve heard of the Kimetsu pacing is that it could have stood to give us one of more arc to bond with the characters at least a little more, so we could really, really be emotional over loosing them. We get all our spare Pillar interactions in works outside of canon and after Tanjirou initially gets to know Shinobu, he has no more on-screen interactions with her; she mostly appears in Taisho Secrets. Pillar Training was fun and all, but maybe another arc with stakes in it that occurs closer to home and brings out some different sides of the Pillars in Tanjirou’s presence, instead of each of them getting one dance each with our protagonist. That would had been a chance to show Shinobu and Mitsuri’s friendship, in which case, we would had really, really wanted to see Mitsuri’s reaction. But, Mitsuri had a job to do in the very, very, very heavy tension and battles that ran in weekly magazines for months on end. She carried the very heavy weight of needing to provide brevity. Her silliness contrasted against all that tension was fresh air for readers who had been holding their breath (no pun intended! kinda) through so much. And man, our reliance on her for that made it hurt all the more when things suddenly got very serious for her. But, that means she was also unable to play a heavy emotional role too early on. There wasn’t room to give her a satisfyingly emotional reaction to Shinobu or Tokitou; when after all, this is the girl who was fretting about dearly beloved Oyakata-sama, was horrified to see the explosion, angirly attacked Muzan, but was saved from certain doom almost immediately after she was taken by surprise in the Infinity Fortress, and then she’s BACK TO 100% FANGIRL MODE. Like, giiiiiiiiiirl, Oyakata-sama just diiiiiiied, tone it down a notch. I feel like I had more to say. OH YEAH. WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?: To fanfic, duh. Going back to reaction and action and producing something with sellable pacing, again, I wouldn’t risk bogging down the tension-heavy final arc with too much open sadness (less is more definitely applies when the reaction scenes were often SO GOOD), but it clearly set up the desire for it. And, the length and intensity with which a work of fiction can live rent-free in audiences’ minds is a measure of its success. If we MUST turn to fanfiction to get that emotional closure (or force the Pillars to get theirs), then this is proof of a job well done in making us care. Herein lies the freedom with fanfiction: It doesn’t have to be good. It doesn’t have to sell. It doesn’t have to fit a regular serialized format. Fanfic is whatever it wants, all it has to do is indulgently scratch an itch. I have way more stomach for sappiness in fanfic than in original canon, because I have higher expectations of canon to honor writing conventions, and to make decisions that will serve the overall story, not necessarily cater to my tastes. But fanfic? Fanfic, you are here to serve me. Dive into those characters’ dry eyes with a jackhammer and gives me their tears. I don’t care how much you have to fry their brains to do it, give it to me. I mean, I don’t write fanfic like that, noooo. At least, not that I post publicly. Ssh. No one needs to know aaaaaall my particular canon itches I wish to have picked raw. But all the more power to people who DO post that publicly and provide a great service to all the other people with that same need. But, in the spirit of writing fic that tries to honor the spirit of canon, I try to sprinkle the juicy emotional potential canon could have had around as needed, to draw out what I feel canon just didn’t have the opportunity to give us. It’s ultimately self-servicing for what I wish canon would had done, but my style of published fic does try to stay widely appealing as a gen fic. Everybody’s got their own balances and tastes, and that’s cool. And that is freedom canon authors don’t have. I’ll conclude by saying that, although we as readers collectively earned it, the ending of Kimetsu no Yaiba was too bright and happy and specifically chose bittersweet moments that would be easy to swallow (pretty smart for a quick ending), but entirely skipped all the really heavy stuff in the immediate aftermath.

And yes, as difficult (and even dull) as it would be to slog through, there’s a part of me that wants to see all that, for the sake of closure.

And now I sleep byyyyezzzzzzzzz

#KnY fandom theories and meta #KnY Spoilers #tw death #KnY nerdery #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer

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gayestnerdsinfiction · 3 years

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Scriddler headcanon- Jonathan absolutely hates Ed’s taste in music

see this is interesting bc i think i have controversial opinions about Jon's music taste 👀

“Got everything?” Jonathan asks, looking up as Edward makes his way down the front steps to the car. He’s loading up the car with everything they’re taking on their little trip.

“I think so.” Edward sees Jonathan’s Scarecrow costume and gear, a small medical cooler, and two duffels crammed into the trunk of the rusty old Ford that Jonathan refuses to get rid of. That car is probably older than Edward himself. “I don’t really know what one brings on a road trip to buy drugs.” He places his own black bag into the trunk, carefully nestling it between the duffels for maximum padding. He assumes one of the bags contains Jonathan’s personal effects, but he’s not the kind of person to bring two bags for a three day trip. He resists the urge to unzip the bags and take a peek inside.

Jonathan closes the trunk, giving Edward a look. “For the last time, this is not a road trip and we are not buying drugs. This is a business trip, if anything, and I’m getting chemicals for my toxin.” He walks around to the driver’s side and opens the door, pausing to look back at Edward before he gets in. “And if I happen to familiarize myself with New Jersey’s recreational marijuana industry, then that’s my prerogative as an American.”

“Whatever you say, Willie Nelson.”

“You’d better shut the fuck up before I drive off and leave you here,” he grumbles as he folds himself into the driver’s seat.

Edward smiles to himself but doesn’t push his luck. He gets into the car and they pull out of the driveway and onto the road. Which sounds like a road trip as far as Edward’s concerned, but apparently that’s a point of debate.

“Can I pick the music?” Edward asks.

Jonathan’s jaw tenses visibly. “Sure,” he says, eyes fixed on the road. “I think there are some CDs in the glove compartment.”

“Oh, that’s alright. I came prepared.” Edward produces a small, leather CD case filled with music he knows Jonathan will absolutely despise. “Since your car is from the stone age and doesn’t have Bluetooth or even an mp3 player, I dug around in the box of things I’ve hoarded from my wretched childhood and found all my favorite CDs from high school. There’s some really good stuff in here, too,” he adds, unzipping the case and flipping through it. “We’ve got Hanson, Destiny’s Child, Backstreet Boys—oh, Spice Girls, of course. A classic.” He turns to look expectantly at Jonathan. “What do you think?”

Jonathan is making that face he makes when he’s annoyed with Edward but doesn’t want to give Edward the satisfaction of being annoyed with him. “You said you wanted to pick.”

This is one of the little games Edward likes to play with the other man. When they’re at home, his favorite way to torment Jonathan is by playing the most manufactured, inane, bubblegum pop music he can find. Jaunty showtunes, songs made by seventeen year old social media stars, boy bands who act like teenagers despite being well over 25. He’s never been able to infiltrate Jonathan’s car before, though. Usually when they’re driving together it’s away from the scene of a crime, so not really an appropriate time for tunes. But now they have a two hour drive to sit and listen to whatever Edward wants. The mere thought of it is delicious to him. What makes this game so fun is watching Jonathan’s internal struggle between his hatred of Edward’s taste in music and his enduring need to never express any emotions under any circumstances.

Jonathan likes music. He spends a surprising amount of time with headphones on, listening to God knows what. But he’s not willing to turn off whatever Edward wants to listen to if it means revealing his own secretive taste in music in the process. No, he’d much rather sit and be miserable instead of letting another human being know him.

Edward keeps looking through his CD collection, briefly getting caught up in the nostalgia of his adolescent taste in music. He remembers dancing alone in his room to Madonna, discussing Britpop with his friends over lunch at school, getting into his first car crash with Britney Spears blaring on the radio. To this day he gets a sick sort of feeling when he listens to “Baby One More Time.”

“This TLC album is pretty good,” Edward says after a while, sliding the disc out of its sleeve. “We’ll start with this, maybe move on to a little Spice Girls, top it off with some Cher?”

“Whatever you like,” Jonathan says evenly.

Edward pops the CD into the player, sitting back in his seat as the beat kicks in on the first track. “What are the bags for?” he asks.

“What bags?”

“The duffels. In the back.”

“Cash and clothes.” They pull onto the highway. “Cash for the drop, clothes for… my body.”

“Yes, Jonathan, I know what clothes are for.” The brief intro song fades out and the second track begins. Edward turns up the volume.

They drive in silence for a little while. Edward watches the trees blurring past the window as they get further and further away from Gotham. It will be nice to get out of the city, even for a few days.

Edward hears a soft tapping sound and he looks over to see Jonathan drumming his fingers against the steering wheel in time with the music. Could it be that Edward has achieved a completely unprecedented win and found a song that Jonathan actually likes?

“So, we’re a TLC fan, are we?” Edward says coyly, straightening up.

Jonathan’s hands still and he tightens his grip on the wheel. “I’m not really a fan of anything,” he says.

“Liar. You like music. You like this music.”

“It’s fine.”

“Please, I saw you tip-tapping along. I know you liked it.” He grins at Jonathan whose flushed face is still looking pointedly at the windshield. “You can’t hide from me, Jonathan Crane. I know your tells.”

“I can appreciate a good beat. That’s all.”

“So you admit you like the beat!” Edward says triumphantly. “And the beat is a core element of the song, implying that, at its core, you like the song.”

“Edward—”

“You know I’m right.”

“The only thing I know is that I’m on the verge of running this car off the road and killing us both to save myself the strife of being in this conversation any longer.”

Edward slumps back in his seat, giving Jonathan an exaggerated pout. “You can’t threaten me with physical violence any time I say something that annoys you.”

“Why not?”

#jonathan crane #scarecrow #riddler #edward nygma #dc #batman #my writing #my fic #music #i really firmly believe jon has a very eclectic music taste and likes almost everything except for like the kitschiest stuff #so i think of the artists named in this fic he'd be most into TLC cuz they're more hip hop/rnb and i feel like he can get down with that

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keyframe-moved · 2 years

Note

honestly i am simply in the mood to talk about pokéspe so here i am! i have come with questions (and opinions).

1) what's your favorite arc of the manga? i need to reread the whole manga at some point because i know my favorite arc is influenced by nostalgia but At This Point it's probably ruby/sapphire, but followed incredibly closely by or tied with g/s/c and hg/ss. x/y is also up there.

2) what's your LEAST favorite arc of the manga? this is a bit of a tough question for me because i truly love almost all of the manga but luckily for me there's an almost in there. i simply do not enjoy the omega ruby/alpha sapphire arc. it does not vibe with me. it's not necessarily bad for any specific reason but i just don't click with the story or characters as much as usual.

3) do you have a physical manga collection? this question is mostly so i can gush about mine whoops. over quite a few years i've collected every arc from red/blue to x/y and my books are my favorite thing i own! unfortunately my x/y collection is all mini volumes which i personally am not a fan of, so i'll end up reselling them and replacing them with normal volumes when i can. as of now i'm on a break from buying new volumes until there are more normal volumes out.

okay that's it!! i hope the rambling from me is alright!

HIII sorry for the late response I was sleeping but fuck yeah pokespe infodumping moments let's go

1. oogh this is kind of hard . I want to say RGB just for nostalgia reasons and also because it's the one I've reread the most (partially because it's a genuinely really good read, partially because I keep telling myself I want to reread the original continuity and then leaving off at RS for whatever reason and restarting UBUDAMKJNID) . I think the best arcs, ones I would recommend to people who didn't care about reading the books in order for whatever reason, would probably be either RS or XY. RS stands better on its own a little more than XY though, iirc (XY has a lot of callbacks DNJISJJO). I also have a soft spot for FRLG just because it's kind of funny how fucking miserable and angsty it is for the good portion of it it's like the emo teen phase of pokespe

2. This one is Also hard but not as much. When I think "least favorite" I tend to try and think of something I actively dislike but I feel like the only contender here is ORAS because honest to God I like read it once when I was 16 and I cannot remember a single fuckign thing . That happened in it ? I have no feelings about it other than the art was nice 👍 DJSKNFNJKS aside from that uhh I think that B2W2 is like... the weakest? Which makes sense because of the whole . Hiatus thing . But idk by the time I finished reading it (I waited to read it until it was finished) I remember feeling like there was a lot of wasted potential with Lack-Two and Whi-Two's characters . Given Pokespe has made a lot of commentary in the past about corruption and, for lack of a better term, the literal enslavement of children and how it's Obviously Evil and Bad, I figured that they would have like... a more emotional character arc, like Blue or Silver did? But IIRC they just didn't, there was set-up but no payoff. It has the same energy as like... if HGSS had ended with Silver actually going back and training under Pryce . Nothing felt resolved with these kids' internal issues, they just went full circle. Maybe I am misremembering something but yeah i guess in terms of Pokespe arcs I'm very forgiving, and I'm usually like "this arc might be kinda bad but it has a lot of good!" but B2W2 had the least good and the most bad, so like . Yeah

Also honorable mention for both questions . HGSS . I cannot tell if it's actually good but I have a lot of mental illness about it . 8/10

And lastly, 3; I DO but it's a fucking unorganized Disaster Area rn. I also have a really weird assortment of books that's only really helped by me having half of the collector's volumes. I meant to get more but we asked for something really expensive for Christmas, so I might try to get my hands on the rest for our birthday ? Idk . I don't have a bookshelf so my Pokespe display is actually just... the top of my dresser? So I don't actually have a lot of space to uh . Put them . But yknow NDKMOAIJND If I have the energy later I might clean and reorganize the display so I can get a decent picture of it

Thank you for questions I am giving you a gold star sticker here u go

#i had to take a screenshot of your icon because tumblr was being weird #💛 speaks #ask

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yobitnet · 4 years

Text

Yobit.net Cash Is Dead Yobit Exchange

“Physical money is out,” said B.S. Kohli, an economic advisor to the top of the Indian state of Punjab. Mothanna Gharaibeh, Jordan’s minister of digital economy and entrepreneurship, agreed.

As of this year, Gharaibeh said, Jordanians can not buy government services, from taxes to hospital bills, with cash. they need to use electronic payment systems like bank transfers or mobile wallets.

“It’s getting to be a troublesome transformation,” he said, pertaining to the nation’s poor and unbanked populations. “But refugees can take mobile wallets using their UN Refugee Agency ID cards. … We just got to stop printing [bills] and put it instead on mobile accounts or in bank accounts.”

Unlike many dollar-dominance-skeptics in Davos for the forum, Gharaibeh said pegging Jordanian dinars to the dollar has served the smaller nation well for many years . He doesn’t see needing to reinvent money, just remove the anonymous properties.

“Because we'd like to prevent evasion ,” he said.

Israeli historian Yuval Noah Harari – author of the bitcoin community cult classic "Sapiens" – said he’s skeptical of bitcoin.

“Money goes within the direction of more and more trust,” he said. “Bitcoin is predicated on mistrust. It’s basically a return to gold.”

On the opposite hand, Harari predicted the entire elimination of monetary privacy could happen “very quickly,” which he described as a “dangerous” prospect.

Ask almost any economist, banker or yobittex.com politician at the WEF about financial privacy and they’ll scoff. With shockingly few exceptions, most will say more financial data collection and passive surveillance will benefit society. (When pressed, they could emphasize the importance of encryption and regulating access to the info .)

RegTech expert Diana Paredes, an underwriter turned CEO of the compliance startup Suade Labs, agreed the sentiment among her public- and private-sector clients is “cash is dead.” However, she added, it’s the work of policymakers to guard consumer interests.

“What we should always be doing is regulating privacy around [electronic payments],” she said. “I want to have my data. It should belong to me, not the bank.”

Bitcoin in Davos

Fear not, bitcoiners: Not all members of the yobit Davos elite are pushing for e-fiat authoritarianism; some leaders here see a future where bitcoin continues to thrive.

“Bitcoin may be a fantastic idea, as long because it is monitored,” Kohli said, praising the compliance standards already upheld by bitcoin-friendly Swiss banks.

Bruno Le Maire, the French minister of finance , offers a shining example of a bitcoin-friendly politician.

He said decentralized digital assets will have a task to play within the way forward for France, as long as organizations just like the crypto custody startup Ledger and therefore the bitcoin development startup ACINQ still pay taxes and uphold regular compliance standards.

“We don’t want digital companies issuing their own currencies like sovereign states,” he said, making a subtle dig at Facebook’s Libra. “But we believe [bitcoin] can reduce the prices and delays of international payments. … We strongly believe fintech.”

Likewise, Mariam Al Muhairi of the state-backed Dubai Future Foundation says her team will spend 2020 exploring the way to support companies that want to use digital assets.

“It’s to assist regulate that area,” she said, emphasizing the team remains within the research phase. “There are entities that do own and use [cryptocurrency].”

Paredes added the simplest thanks to protect bitcoin’s usability is to teach regulators about specific use cases in order that they can make laws and compliance standards without jeopardizing projects useful .

The divide between cypherpunks and banks grows ever more narrow when experts drill right down to the specifics.

wef-2020-bruno

French minister of finance Bruno Le Maire et al. discuss the way to tax Big Tech. (Credit: Leigh Cuen for CoinDesk)

Common ground

Most crypto veterans at the WEF were even as hooked in to financial institution digital currencies (CBDC) because the bankers themselves.

For example, Elizabeth Rossiello, CEO of Aza Financial (formerly known by the name of its retail product, BitPesa), said she’s “really excited” about the People’s Bank of China issuing a CBDC. She sees this so far another customer onramp that enhances the very fact bitcoin makes up 7 percent of her company’s monthly volume.

MakerDAO Foundation CEO Rune Christensen agrees: “Generally i feel it’s specialized for the trend of digitizing the economy,” he said of the CBDC trend. “It’s just a step toward more blockchain adoption.” His project’s DAI stablecoin, he told CoinDesk, could at some point be the liquidity backbone for the world’s CBDCs.

Meanwhile, Cloudflare CTO John Graham-Cumming said his internet infrastructure company generally takes a proactive approach to promoting censorship-resistance, whilst his team supports clients like banks and similar institutions within the public sector.

“What goes over our network isn’t really our business. and that we don’t think it’s our job to work that out because that might be quite creepy,” he said, adding the corporate runs gateways to both ethereum and therefore the InterPlanetary filing system (IPFS).

From Graham-Cumming’s perspective, bitcoin is a powerful experiment because it actually works and continues to figure , no matter political and technical challenges. Yet, Cloudflare is more focused on ethereum.

“When you check out the smart contract stuff, that’s a programing language . we expect someone goes to create something interesting with ethereum and that we hope they’ll find our services useful,” he said. “As people start to figure with new organizations for financial transactions, they have to ask how that organization is brooding about security. … We’re all resting on top of something else.”

The only thanks to protect privacy during a world of digital cash, he said, is with a mixture of excellent regulatory policies and standard “best practices” that promote security throughout the ecosystem’s architecture.

“The idea of Web3 is that you simply should be resilient,” he concluded.

Zack Seward contributed reporting.

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adultswim2021 · 2 years

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Aqua Teen Hunger Force #58: “Aqua Teen Hunger Force Star Studded Christmas Spectacular Starring Rhon Geremi” | December 19, 2005 – 12:00AM | S05E03 (AKA “Deleted Scenes” - two-part version aired January 3, 2007 and January 4, 2007 at 12:00AM)

Here's the thing: the Library of Congress website has the long title for this episode and that's it as far as I can tell. Swimpedia distinguishes the original 30-minute version of the episode as “Deleted Scenes” while the two-parter version has the long title only. I was curious to see if it was split into two episodes or not in it's official registration document, or if separate entries cover the two-parter or what, but I only found one listing. Also, it was filed in August of 2006, solidly after the first version aired and solidly before the two-parter ever did. Believe me, I'll cover all that stuff later. I'll probably spend way too much time talking about it, too.

This is a fairly unspectacular episode on paper, and could be considered a legitimate “cheater” ep; not for anti-humor reasons or intentional time-wasting reasons, or whatever. This episode consists mostly of Shake in a vague “backstage” area with a projector set up, and he's showing us clips from the Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie, which had yet to come out, and wouldn't be out for a while, actually. I remember seeing this special, really liking what I saw of the movie (despite the fact that we were seeing stuff that was actually cut out of it), and sorta being under the impression that the movie was basically almost done because how else could they have nice-looking deleted scenes?

The scenes concern Carl having his pimp-ass rims stolen from his car by the Mooninites. They are hypno rims that he intended to rape women with. They don't put it in such coarse terms, but let's not split hairs here, Carl is a sicko rapist freak. Anyway, the Mooninites use the rims to hypnotize Carl into doing their bidding, including him shoving a broom up his own ass and stealing a microchip from the Aqua Teens for them. It really whetted our collective appetites for the upcoming film, boy did it ever. I mean, *I* liked it.

Okay, so I have the Aqua Teen Hunger Force Volume 5 DVD and guess what? One of the episodes on it won't play. That's one bittersweet thing about this blog: as I reach for certain series on certain DVD discs, I'm discovering that despite the fact that I take *pretty* good care of my DVDs that some of them are inexplicably no longer working. Disc rot? Bad batch? Who knows! Physical media is nice, but it sure don't last forever, so buy up some huge hard drives, and some more huge hard drives to back up those huge hard drives, and don't forget to back up everything. You'll never have enough time to do this, realistically, and even if you attempt it certain precious things will still surely fall through the cracks. But you gotta try.

Anyway: Volume 5 on DVD has this episode in it's later two-part state. If you want the original half-hour version, you need to get the ATHF movie on DVD; the original two-disc version (don't know if there's a one-disc version out there but I can't rule it out) has the thirty-minute edition of the episode on the second disc. I spotted some differences by the way! Here they are (there may be more):

The thirty-minute version has deleted scene where Meatwad attempts to replace Carl's stolen rims with Christmas wreaths. Then the Mooninites show up with their spaceship tricked out, trying to make Carl jealous. In the two-parter this whole scene is moved to be beginning of part two so they could use it as an introduction. They cut out the part with the Christmas wreaths.

There's a bit where Shake and Meatwad bicker about the practice of putting bloopers doing the closing credits of a movie (citing Cannonball Run as an example). This is missing from the two-parter.

The two-parter includes the full opening sequence for both parts, and closing credits are added over the final moments of the first part. The thirty minute version originally has Shake throwing to commercial by falsely claiming that he also produced the commercials we're about to watch. The two-parter version has a generic sign-off instead. There's also the aforementioned added introduction for part 2, which utilizes a deleted scene that originally aired in the first part of the thirty-minute version.

This episode also includes a little clippy of Raydon, a little live-action short Dave and Matt made that wound up on one of these DVDs. I should've been covering that stuff as ephemera, maybe, but... I fucked up. On that note: can anybody find “Michael Myer's Day Off”? There are a bunch of different unrelated sketches with similar premises on the internet. The one that Matt/Dave made (if I remember correctly) was never on a DVD and was only ever a low-res internet video. It featured a DOLL of Michael Myers, I think. Also I remember it being stunningly unfunny. Like, there weren't any jokes in the entire thing. I'm just curious to see it again, is all.

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #aqua teen hunger force

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libraryofsouls · 4 years

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modern technology: with or against? - the collector, brahms, chromeskull, sinclair brothers

are the slashers with or against modern technology?

Asa Emory / The Collector

with 100%. he already uses technology regularly so he’d definitely be on board for some improvement. considering a certain someone had the audacity to break all of his precious displays.

better motion triggers? better cameras? sign. him. up. he’s an academic so he’d have no problem figuring out how everything works. just give him a few minutes and he’ll have everything set up in no time.

starts tinkering on his traps and upgrades the state of his collection immediately. his tarantulas are finally going to get better enclosures! sturdier tank displays for the sewn bodies! huzzah!

asa is already dangerous with the bare minimum - now equipped with better gear, he’s truly horrifying. he’s going to be much better at not being caught. let’s be honest, he’ll probably get drunk with power in the near future.

he is, most definitely, going to put trackers on his victims. no the shock collars are not for his beloved dogs, silly! those are for his victims too.

Brahms Heelshire

WITH, all the way. he is going to be so, so dangerous with modern technology. once he figures out how to get wifi, it’s game over. this man is LOADED so he’s going to have the best stuff too.

like asa, he would need little to no help at all. brahms is naturally very studious and he’s got all the time in the world.

two words: hidden cameras. out with peering into rooms through the holes in the walls, in with having a designated area for all his monitors so he can indulge in all his voyeuristic glory in the comfort of his man-cave.

potentially his new approach in getting victims. (and an actual sequel, touched on it here. yes I’ve been thinking about this too much.)

in true, awful bastard man fashion, he’s most likely going to J.O in his man-cave while watching his victim in the shower. maybe he’ll have a little shrine in there too, complete with distasteful pictures.

Jesse Cromeans / Chromeskull

WITH, no doubt. all aboard the technology train! this man also uses quite a lot already and could definitely use an upgrade. cosmetic surgery? sign him up. his face could use a bit more work.

much easier to find victims and track them down if they manage to escape. digital footprints are godsend. oh, you have a security system? he has a jammer. he’s always one step ahead.

plays around in the deep web. let’s just say he’d one of the best if he chooses to be a hitman online. if not, that’s where he’ll get all his latest tech from. weapons, gadgets, possible candidates. what more could you ask for? (LAID TO REST SEQUEL HELLO ?????)

he probably won’t ditch his knives or his mask. he would have a fancy-ass gun with a silencer on him at the most. while there are a lot of weapons in the market now that would do the job more efficiently, jesse would want to stick to his roots.

would he go digital with his recordings? depends if he’s sentimental and would prefer keeping physical tapes. or, he could be hosting his own red room and has everything backed up. (I am once again asking for a laid to rest sequel that goes this route)

BONUS: uses text-to-speech to tickle his fucked-up sense of humour. nothing more terrifying than a slasher taunting you in the monotone google voice.

Sinclair Brothers / Bo, Vincent and Lester

if possible - they’d take advantage. the only way they’d be able to get new tech is by looting their victims. bo is strongly against buying anything they don’t need. (mostly because they don’t have a lot of spending money to begin with.) sure, generators would be nice but why are they so fucking expensive?

the most they could potentially get would be fancy camping gear and a few gadgets. because of the shitty reception they would either have to memorize all the decent spots (sort of useful, so they can keep the victims away from it) or just ditch the cellphones altogether. lester would definitely keep one for himself, along with a number of “cool” things he can find.

if they’re lucky they could score a couple of walkie-talkies. would be useful in theory, but the sibling bickering wouldn’t be worth it - at least in vincent’s opinion. (he won’t turn it off, but have the volume at the minimum)

bo could improve the place with camping gear, tinker with it a bit to make ambrose appear more realistic. he could definitely figure out how to set the lights to turn on and off at certain times with the right materials. and even more moving wax figures! if they were to score hunting gear, he might even set up traps.

vincent is the true neutral here. he acknowledges the funky little gadgets, might study with them for a while and just kind of leave it at that. (if a victim happens to have a drawing tablet however, that’s another story.) lester would be the most enthusiastic out of the three, while bo really just wants to make the most out of all the junk.

#was gonna write for all of them but then i realized #i haven't seen ALL of their movies yet (for the ones i didn't include)#i've only seen piss!billy but not edgy!billy #asa emory #the collector #brahms heelshire #the boy #jesse cromeans #chromeskull #bo sinclair #lester sinclair #vincent sinclair #with or against #with or against: modern technology #my writing #general headcanons #slashers

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