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pashminalamb · 13 days

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𝔹ℝ𝔼𝔸𝕂𝕀ℕ𝔾 ℝ𝕌𝕃𝔼𝕊.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 : 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐒𝐚𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐀𝐢𝐤𝐮'𝐬 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : 𝐈𝐭𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐒𝐚𝐞 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦! 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 (𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐦; 𝐒𝐚𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝟐𝟑 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐫)

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐑𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : 𝐌𝐃𝐍𝐈 (𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐠𝐞/ 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭), 𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝟏𝟖+, 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭.

୨⍣୧｡ Tags : degradation, use of toys, exhibitionism (kinda), CNC, teasing in public, jealous! Sae, dom!mean!Sae, bratty!reader, spit play, pussy slapping, clit pinching, possessiveness.

୨⍣୧｡ Wc : 1.7k

୨⍣୧｡ Likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated !! <3

୨⍣୧｡ A/N : Yes, I will be adding an additional part 2 this

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐃𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤. 𝐃𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞.𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐬 : @𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐬-𝐛𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲

“Mhm Sae not in here…” you protested, your moans being swallowed by the man in front of you as he pressed you against the door, his hands pinning down your wrists by your head while he littered kisses on your neck.

“Yes in here.” He said, licking the sensitive spot of your neck, biting into it lightly, drawing out a strained mewl from your lips. “You wanted to be a slut for them earlier right? Too bad. The only hands that go on you are mine. The only privilege I’ll give them is hearing you right…”

He leaned closer to your ear, biting the lower lobe of it.

“Through.”

“This. Fucking. Door.” he said between littering kisses on your ear. Pulling away with his cerulean eyes meeting yours, he traced the bottom of your lip with his thumb,

“You’re gonna do something for me.”

Eyebrows pinched you wondered what he was planning to do to you. Reaching into the back of his pocket, he pulled out something small and pink.

Was that…?

“It’s an egg vibrator. And before you ask, yes. I was planning to use this on you tonight. The last time we had a party, Oliver wouldn’t stop talking about the ‘fuck me’ eyes you were giving him. Bastard fucking taunted me in the sauna, with how much he wanted to get into your pants. But…” he said, fingers lightly caressing your neck.

“No one gets this pussy except me. Isn’t that right dove?”

No one knew. No one knew that you and the midfielder were seeing each other; the camera always on the lookout for the person that the player was secretly seeing… not to mention the breach of the contract with you being the manager.

You nodded with a whimper, hands circling around his shoulders to keep him in place as he went back to licking your neck, his hands moving towards the skirt you were wearing.

“Spread your legs for me, pretty girl.” He commanded, hand tapping on your inner thigh. Bashful, you hid your face in his chest, spreading your legs wide open for him with the dark spot on your stockings visible.

“Look at how messy you are.” He admired, the tips of his fingers lightly teasing the outer folds of your cunt.

“Guess my spit won’t be needed huh?” He chuckled darkly, hand becoming rough as he massaged your pussy, drawing moans out of you. Pulling away to stare into your eyes, he didn’t stop, fingers entering slightly in and out, teasing your wet folds.

“Beg me for my spit.”

Clenching your legs as you felt his fingers rub tight circles into your clit on purpose, you let out mewls, biting into his shoulders as your fingers dug into his shirt. Feeling his hand pull away, you lifted your head to look up at him, only to be met with a cruel gaze briefly with a sharp slap on your cunt.

“I said. Beg. For. My. Fucking. Spit.”

“Please. Sae. I want your spit. Make me wet. Please.” You begged, hands shaking at his shirt lightly as he gave you a dark grin.

“Good girl.” He said, giving a quick kiss to the corner of your mouth, kneeling down to come face to face with the wet sight in front of him.

“Now. Watch me, dove.”

Collecting spit on the top of his tongue, he let it fall onto two of his fingers, separating the digits to show you strings of saliva. Using the pads of his forefinger and middle finger, he toyed with your clit, looking up at you. Feeling embarrassed, you turned your head to the side, ear placed on the door where you could hear the sounds of low party music and people chattering in the background. Disappointed, Sae pitched your clit, causing you to tense with a broken scream, feeling a slap to your wet core after.

“What did I just say about looking away?”

“To keep watching you.” You grimaced, chest heaving from the intensity of it all.

“Haven’t even fucked you dumb yet and look at you. Already a mess in your head and pretty pussy.” He commented, monotoned. “We don’t want the people outside to think we’re missing do we? Need to follow through with the formalities.” He added, using the head of the vibrator to spread your essence.

“Get it nice and wet… and….” He tantalized in a low raspy voice, inserting the vibrator into you, the silicone string of it hanging out. “It’s in.”

“Give this needy a thing a peck.” he said, giving your lower abdomen a kiss, pulling your stockings up, wiping your essence off his hand crudely.

“For the rules.” He said, pulling his phone out of his pocket. “This is the lowest.” He said, pressing on the screen as you felt the small hum of the vibrator inside you.

“And this… is the highest.” He said with a shrug, pressing on the screen again as you clenched your thighs together, the vibrations of the tiny device so strong that it drew out a whine and made your knees buckle.

“If you’re able to get through the party like this. I’ll reward you. Offer might be… something as exquisite as having my tongue down that needy cunt or if you’re a really good girl and make that pussy behave, I’ll let you ride my face.” he challenged, his head tilting to the side. “Can do that for me, dove?”

“Yes, Sae.”

“Good.” He said with a small smirk, leaning in to give you a passionate kiss, hands lowering to your hips, his fingers pressing into the skin of your waist.

“Let’s go.” He said, giving a pats to your ass as he pushed open the door behind you. “I’ll go first. And then you come out after 4.”

Waiting until the time went by, you walked out of the closet, walking towards the full length mirror in the guest room to make sure you looked presentable. Taking a deep breath you made sure to keep a calm composure despite the acts you were engaged minutes prior. Your heels slapped against the marble as you began to walk towards the living room, your walk going at a slow pace, considering that you had a vibrator lodged up your cunt.

“Manager~ you made it! Thought you dipped on us and went home than going to the bathroom. Not a fan of alcohol?” Aiku asked, raising his glass of liquor.

“You know that that’s bad for you right, Oliver? Even coach said that…” you scolded him sternly. Placing his finger to your lips, he shushed you with the pucker of his lips.

“Shhhhh. It’s not the time to get upset, manager. Its my party, and I’ll drink if I want to~” he singsonged.

“And stuff like this is alright once in a while. You should learn to let loose.” He chuckled, pulling his hand back.

Sae watched the interaction between the both you, eyes narrowing at the closeness of Oliver and you. Pulling out his phone, he began to drag his finger across the screen making sure to let you know that he still had his gaze on you. Feeling the slow hum of the vibrator in your cunt, your knees began to shake ; the urge to let out a moan driving your mind hazy.

Taking a look across the room you watched as Sae stared at his phone with his eyebrows raised, having a nonchalant pose as if he were just going through social media or his messages… as if he weren’t playing the jealous act of protecting his toy.

Jackass.

However you were grateful about the setting not being high like he had demonstrated before, causing your composure to be a mess and desperate for nothing but pleasurable friction stretching the walls of your cunt until you were satisfied.

“Manager….? Are you alright?” Aiku asked with the raise of an eyebrow as he watched you grip your hand tightly.

“Yeah… it’s just a little chilly…” you stuttered awkwardly.

“Well…” Oliver drawled giving you a snide smirk. “I know how to warm a woman up in more ways than one.”

You felt the vibrator turn higher, the pulse of it make your walls quiver with the need to be fucked hard and raw. Turning to give the side eye you watch as Sae took a sip of his liquor, one hand on his phone with his poker face.

Still playing his game? Maybe… you could break a few rules and let him have the taste of his own medicine; punishment be damned.

Placing a hand on Oliver’s shoulder you leaned closer to him, king sure to give Sae the perfect view, making sure to look at him straight in the eye. Making sure… to make him tick with the image before him as being as scandalous as it looked.

“I might take you up on that offer… Oliver.”

Pushing his finger higher against the screen, he narrowed his eyes at you, placing his half empty glass of water on the table, soon turning the humming off, making you want to fall until your knees kissed the floor with your body shaking until you felt relieved when it stopped.

Taking long strides towards the two of you, he was quick to step between Aiku and you.

“Am I interrupting something?”

“No. Not really. Was about to drop the pretty lady home.” Aiku answered, giving him a smug smile, completely aware of the fact that Sae was uncomfortable, the expression on his face being the same yet laced with a hint of irritation. You forced an awkward smile on your face, feeling the intensity of the suspension between both the men.

“I was just about to take up the offer.” you added, giving him an all knowing not-so-innocent smile.

Sae knew you were testing his patience, giving you the look of a warning with the grit of his teeth, making his jaw flex in anger. Good. It wasn’t fair only one could play this game.

“Allow me.” Sae spoke walking past you to take his coat and yours off the hooks that held them at the entrance of the house.

“I could still drop her. You don’t have to bother Sae. It’s my housewarming after all.” Oliver responded with a smug smile. “Why bother yourself with something as trivial as leaving her home? Pretty sure the midfielder has more… pressing matters to attend to?”

“Shut your drunk mouth.” he retorted causing the brunette to chuckle. Taking your forearm in a firm grasp, his warning like eyes shot to yours.

“Let’s go.”

Walking the both of you walk out, Aiku chuckled to himself.

How long were they planning to keep this up? The walls in his house weren’t that thick.

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pashminalamb · 13 days

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『 𝐁𝐥𝐨𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤, 𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐰 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭. 𝐄𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐤. 』

𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐡𝐨𝐛𝐛𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐬𝐨𝐥𝐨 𝐚𝐜𝐭, 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐬 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞.

𝐊𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐌𝐈𝐑𝐀 ||

#theme 'rb

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pashminalamb · 13 days

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𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐒𝐄 𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐇.

𝐄𝐃𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝟏

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐅𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 : 𝐈𝐭𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐒𝐚𝐞, 𝐀𝐢𝐤𝐮 𝐎𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫, 𝐍𝐚𝐠𝐢 𝐒𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨 (𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲'𝐫𝐞 𝟐𝟑 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐫𝐬)

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 : 𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐝𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲?

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐖𝐜 : 𝟑.𝟗𝐤

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞, 𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐰, 𝐦𝐝𝐧𝐢.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬 : 𝐟𝐞𝐦! 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐧𝐮𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐭 𝐫𝐮𝐛𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐯𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐦 (𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐚).

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬 : 𝐮𝐧𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝. 𝐈𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬, 𝐈'𝐥𝐥 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐫𝐞-𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞 : 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭 (𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟 𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧)

୨⍣୧｡ (𝐀/𝐍) : 𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐜𝐞. 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬? 𝐘𝐞𝐬. 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬, 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬, 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 !!

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐃𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭, 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤.

𝐈𝐭𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐒𝐚𝐞 Being in a relationship was an inconvenience; having to deal with the screaming and shouting along with the mess of things thrown in anger across the room, not to mention the changing of work schedules for the sake of a significant other; having to come home early for dinner and going out on dates for the profession of love. It all seemed bleak and pointless.

'Loving another is as good as killing yourself.'

At least that's what Sae said.

‘If you wanna fuck someone constantly why don’t you just get yourself a girlfriend or something?’ you asked, taking a sip of the glass of wine on the fancy kitchen island, your finger running on the rim of the glass.

‘Having no relationship is convenient. I don’t have to answer to anyone on why I’m home late, no annoying texts to respond and just one person to fuck without attachments. Football is all I need; not someone who’s gonna hinder my chances of being exposed to the world and everything good that comes with it.’ he said curtly, taking a sip of wine as he leaned over the counter.

To love each other or perish…

and perish you did.

You knew the casual arrangement you had with Sae wouldn’t last in the long run; not when you had spent late nights moaning into the plush pillows of his bed and soft mornings when the sun would rise only to have him call you to help him with his tie, telling you he had a conference and storming out of the door.

You had spent more nights with him in a week than you had at your apartment, the return of you to your home making you feel lonely as there was only one person on the stove and eating at the kitchen island. There were conversations you made with Sae on the nights he let you over, going over to the other room to sleep.

‘You distinctly remind me of something I’ve seen in my childhood.’

He didn’t say anything as he cut into his food with his knife and fork.

‘Ah. I got it. Ariel.’ you said, pointing at him as he gave you a glare, his tongue prodding into the cheek of his face, a look of disapproval.

‘Although a siren would be more fitting than a mermaid for you.’ you said, biting into your own food as you heard the drag of a fork and knife against porcelain while he ate, the rest of the night passing into silence until the plates were cleared.

Nights with Sae had been silent, but not uncomfortable, his presence being enough in the room.

Until it had come to a stop.

‘Fuck Sae…’ you moaned, hand on his chest as he was above you, pouding into your cunt, one hand resting on the side of your hip while the other toyed with your clit. You breathed as he continued to pull groans after pleasure filled groans from your lips as the tip of his cock kissed the right spots of your cunt, making your back arch and your fingers dig into the pec of his chest.

‘Take it you fucking whore.’ he grunted, angling his hips where he knew would make you mewl for him; lifting your legs to his shoulders where he would stare down at you, his weight pushing your knees on either side of your head until you were completely under him.

‘Right there! Just… ah’ you would repeat, his hips rutting at a ferocious pace, giving you what you wanted, making you cum around him as he watched you lick your fingers, rubbing at your clit, the visual making him groan.

‘Fuck-’ he moaned, cumming into the condom, eyes clenched shut as his grip on your hips loosened, dropping beside you to catch his breath.

And as always, he would lift his robes off the floor.

‘Water’s there.’ he said, pointing to the table beside the bed, the sound of the door closing as you were left alone in the room as the final word.

It had always been like this; you never complained nor did Sae do anything different, the door closing every time he was done with you, leaving you to wrap yourself in empty sheets, walking towards the bedroom that was at the end of the hall that belonged to him.

You knew your place, he didn’t even fuck you in his own bed; it was always the fancy guest room.

It hadn’t been long till you snapped, ruining whatever closeness you had with him.

‘What the fuck.’ you muttered, zooming in on a picture of Sae holding the hand of an Italian model, walking from the jet, his hand on the phone while she wore a smile under the hat she was wearing, you heart clenching painfully in your chest; your phone vibrating in your hand from the notification of the said devil.

‘7 pm. Today.’

The nerve, yet you couldn’t believe the picture of the article based on something he had said once during the conversations you had when wine in hand.

‘Tabloids. They’ll do anything to ruin a person’s image.’

You were going to be there at seven.

Opening the door, Sae was surprised to see you in something complicated, a shirt with a hoodie and jeans along with socks and shoes, too complicated to remove compared to his loosely buttoned up shirt and black pants; the message becoming very obvious as you avoided his eye contact, stepping into his house.

You weren’t here to fuck.

Closing the door behind him, Sae walked behind you into the spacious living room of his house, watching you sit nervously on the black cushion of the plush sofa.

Raising an eyebrow at you, he watched as you scrolled through your phone, showing the picture of the model to him.

‘Are you with her?’

‘Does it matter?’

‘Answer me, Sae.’

‘And who do you think you are that I should answer questions to?’ he said, his tone turning grim and eyebrows narrowing, pupils turning small.

You had no answer as he came face to face with you.

‘You know what you are.’ his words digging into your skin, reminding you that you were nothing more than a bedmate to him.

‘If you think we could be anything more than that, you must be delusional.’ he added coldly, turning his back to you, tears forming on your lash line.

‘You should leave.’ was all he said, footsteps moving away from you.

You could still remember the pain that seared through your body, each step away from his place making you want to cry harder, the memories you made with him playing in the back of your mind, making it hurt more.

‘Don’t gobble up the chocolates like some buffoon. Savor it.’

‘Are you a child trapped in the body of an adult?’

It was obvious that you had something more for him didn’t you? But before it could reach that phase, he decided to shut it down. Stupid you, it was supposed to be something casual, yet you couldn’t forget the times he had kissed your lips, his hands digging his hands into the tresses of your hair as his tongue danced aggressively with yours.

Arriving at your apartment you were tired; emotionally drained, getting into bed as you didn’t change from your clothes hoping that slumber would provide you comfort, the sheets you were wrapped in being yours and not the ones in his fancy guest room.

It was missing his scent.

𝐀𝐢𝐤𝐮 𝐎𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫

‘I want to be with someone who isn’t a hassle to break up with.’ he said, licking his ice cream as you listened to him in silence, your own cone in your hand as you sat on the bench next to him.

‘And what was wrong with the previous ones?’

‘They got too attached to me or I got tired of them… mistakes made by me and they never came back.’ he said boredly.

‘Seems like some old things never change.’ you said, shaking your head, biting into the corner of your ice cream, a few minutes of silence passing by before you spoke again.

‘Don’t mind me Oliver, but why did you decide to tell your sob story to me when you can just go to a club and hang out with any girl you want?’

‘And that’s the reason you’re the perfect candidate. How long have we known each other, bambi?’ he asked, tossing the last of the cone into his mouth, dusting his hands off the crumbs.

This couldn’t be headed in the right direction.

‘Since college.’

‘How many times do we see each other in a week?’

‘Almost everyday unless I have work and you have late night practices. What exactly are you getting at Oliver?’ you asked, lips turning into a frown.

‘You know where I live, you know what I do and you know what kind of a person I am. So, why don’t we become friends with benefits?’ he asked, the question making you choke on your spit.

‘What?’

‘How about it, Bambi? Look.’ he said, placing his hands on either side of the bench, relaxing into it as he stared at you.

‘You’re not interested in me, I’m not interested in you but. We get along fine. I’m not seeing anyone and neither are you since you have time to come and see me and I’ve heard a fair share of your dating experiences as well. So… what do you say?’ he asked, the corner of his mouth stretching out into a smirk.

Maybe you had considered it for a moment, the college you blushing at the fact that Oliver had asked you to be his bedmate, but your dignity cringing at the fact that you had stopped to this level to become close with him. Narrowing your eyes at him you watched as he opened his mouth to add more lines.

“And if any one of us finds an interest in someone, the other can back out. No hard feelings.”

No hard feelings… that went under the bus when you began to realize what this really held for you and what it was in its rawest form.

‘Mhm Oliver…’ you moaned, hands gripping at the pillow as he worked himself into you, hands on your hips as he breathed heavy, swallowing hard to prevent himself from cumming as he felt your pussy clenching around him as he toyed with your clit, letting one of his hands move from your hip, his smirk coming into view from the sight of your tits bouncing from his thrusts.

Reaching your hand around you felt the expanse of his neck, strong and pale under the lights of the lamp across the street as it streamed into the windows; the urge to mark him and make him yours calling out to you. It was that night you realized that you might have fallen for him, s violation to wanting something with no strings attached.

‘You keep clenching around me like that, you’re gonna make me nut early, Bambi.’ he tried to joke, hips slapping against yours from behind as his fingers dug into your skin, the feelings of his lips on the side of your neck as he leaned over to kiss you.

Holding onto his hand while you were on your knees, you felt the expanse of the veins on his arm warm and big. You wondered what it was like to have your hands engulfed in his as you walked down crowded streets or wanting to cross roads.

You knew you wouldn’t get to experience that, keeping those thoughts to yourself until time had passed, fantasizing about it in your sleep as he would leave you alone, going to sleep on the couch after since ‘you were a lady and you weren’t allowed to sleep on the couch.’ leaving to sleep alone.

It didn’t help that the pillows smelled like him, making you find comfort and warmth in it, nuzzling into the cloth deeper, your brain painting a picture of him hugging you from behind as you slept.

Four weeks into the agreement and it didn’t help that the things you saw reminded you of him.

‘He uses that brand of shampoo doesn’t he?’ you’d think noticing the brand name on the other side of the aisle, a basket in hand when you would be out grocery shopping.

‘He hates this brand of cereal.’

‘Mint… he might like it.’

‘The pit viper are a set of species found in Eurasia and the Americas; similar to all other vipers, they are known to be venomous…’ the sounds of the television echoed in the room as you chewed on popcorn, feet perched on the coffee table, hand on the remotes pausing to watch as the green pit viper forked its tongue out at the screen.

Viper… the color was too bright for his eyes but it reminded you of him nonetheless.

‘Weird how he resembles a snake and yet likes something with feathers.’

It seemed like you couldn’t catch a break even on your days off.

The last straw was when he had begun to appear in your dreams, making it seem like it had been a joke that he was so far away from you in reality. Oliver was kind with his gestures, giving you a light bite to things yet offering you nonetheless.

It made your heart flutter and your mind tear in two different directions.

It wasn’t long for your heart to follow; having it ripped to shreds in return.

It had been a night at the club, deciding to spend it outside with your friends; neither was it the night that had you tangled in Oliver’s sheets. The loud music and drinking had distracted you from him until you squinted among the lights, seeing a familiar figure of the same height standing on the nearest wall had a girl between his arms, making out with her passionately.

Your heart broke.

Your mind, now sober as you watch Oliver smirk into her lips, his eyes moving to the corner as he watched you stand there, both humiliated and have it rubbed in your face.

He didn’t stop either, going the extra mile to tilt her face and stare into your eyes, making you low away with the clench of your jaw as you walked towards the bathroom.

Even on the night off, you couldn’t catch a break from him could you? Traitorous tears flowing down your face as you tried to wipe them away only for more to pour down your face. Deciding to turn in for the night, you tried to save the best you could of your makeup, turning off the tap. Opening the doorknob of the bathroom, you were surprised to find Oliver leaning over the wall casually as you walked out, turning his face to see you, a frown evident on his lips. You said nothing as you turned the other way, Oliver pulling you back with a hold of your wrist in his firm grip, stopping you from leaving. You turned around to face him watching his lips as they moved.

“I know a look when I see one. The agreement is over.” he said, letting go of your hand with a throw.

“And if you did, you are cruel. No wonder you can’t keep anyone for long enough, Aiku.” you said, shoving past his shoulder to walk out of the club.

You ran yourself sick that night, finding comfort in ice cream and caffeine, watching movies on the couch till the sun rose.

So much so for not being a hassle.

𝐍𝐚𝐠𝐢 𝐒𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨

“So, you’re telling me that you want a relationship without responsibility?” you asked, biting into a chip as Nagi did the same, the two of you holding the game consoles in your hands, noises coming out of the tv as your characters fought against each other.

“You know you can’t have all the good things in your life right, Miffs?” you asked with a chuckle, managing to do some critical damage to his character while his eyebrows pinched together, fingers getting more aggressive on the buttons of the console.

“Relationships and responsibility go hand in hand. What you’re asking for is a gaming console without buttons. How do you expect to play if you don’t have one or the other?”

“Mhm…”

“So what you want is something unreasonable… What brought this up?” you asked, eyebrows pinched at the screen in front of the both of you.

“Girls are annoying. Doesn’t help the fact that I’m a man.” he said, simply, thumbs swiping at the controls.

“So basically you want the benefits that a girl has to offer… without wanting to be serious about it?” you asked, a chuckle inciting from within you regarding the ridiculousness of his demands.

“Yep.”

“Well… good luck on that.” you said, exhaling through your nose, ending the game as you relaxed back into the couch, sipping on the soda that was set beside you.

“You’re gonna be helping me with it.” Nagi announced, making you spit out your soda.

Huh?

He watched your perplexed expression with a blank look, grabbing a few paper towels from ahead and handing them over to you.

“You’re used to me. You know what to expect out of me which makes you a good reason.” he said, joining his hands over and leaning towards you.

Wiping at the droplets of the soda on your lips, you wondered if you truly could handle him. You had had your fair share of relationships but never had it been the case where you would have a relationship let alone a casual one that you played games with or met on a daily basis. Things were bound to be awkward and uncomfortable once you had entered the point of no return and it was either continuing the path forward or simply breaking a friendship that had lasted long and leaving memories of it as a ‘good run’.

“I… I don’t think it is a good idea, Seishiro. We’re close and I don’t want-” “Things won’t get awkward between us if that’s what you’re worried about. You can still go out on dates and the same goes for me as well…” he trailed. “You can still be my friend and gaming partner.” he added with a side-eyed look, a smirk on the corner of his lips.

With the roll of your eyes, you settled into the couch beside him, munching on your chips.

Maybe things could work out.

Three weeks and things were starting to seem different with you looking forward to visits from Nagi or when you were called over to his house.

‘ Faster. Go faster- hah’ you moaned, hands on his arms as he held one of your thighs close to his hip, angling his cock deeper into your pussy, wanting to give you what the both of you wanted and craved; the other on your throat, his thumb caressing the edge of your jaw.

His gray eyes bored into yours as he came close, leaving a kiss on your lips, thrusting himself into you, in and out, your moans pouring into his mouth.

‘Cum for me.’

Your hips bucking into him as he swiped a finger at his tongue, rubbing the wet digit over your clit.

‘Ah- Sei’

‘Good girl. Let go for me.’ he grunted in a low rasp, giving you a final thrust as you came, your thighs shaking from the intensity of it as he overstimulated you, continuing to thrust into you even if you came, feeling your walls wrap around him tightly as he thrust in and out of you, repeating over and over again till you had a second orgasm and him, having his first. He’d drop beside you, turned to the other side of the bed, muttering a ‘night’ before going to sleep; morning would come with the other side of the bed being empty as you ran your hand on the sheets, not feeling a warm body next to you with a missing milk carton from your fridge.

He could have at least stayed for breakfast.

Things had been going fine for a month with Nagi coming over to your house or you going to his for the sake of getting off, the sound of the bed creaking under the weight of the both of you and the silence of the room now filled the room; until you found yourself craving more than intimacy from him.

It was always evident from your urges to run your hands through his hair when he was around you or the way you wanted to pick on him for letting his hair getting long, blocking his vision when he was out to play or the time you spent lingering in his room while he slept, wondering if he was seeing other people and if he felt anything towards you as you did for him.

You couldn’t tell your friends about him, knowing that you couldn’t have other people involved in your arrangement. Turning towards advice online proved to be of little use, giving you everything from the rule book of cliched movies, talking your feelings out with your partner; having to keep things to yourself seemed more easier than having to confront him about it.

An option seemed better than the rest; keeping a diary.

Noting down your feelings on a piece of paper than just listened and didn’t speak back seemed to be the new norm every time you would return from Sieshiro’s place or when he left yours, the routine taking place every night where you would write the emotions of the day, most it centering around the words; yearning, craving, missing and affection.

Until that very book was the reason for your ruin when you found Nagi flipping through the pages when you had left your room for a few minutes, his back hunched over the edge of the bed, his hands clenching around the edge of the pocketbook.

He said nothing as he stared at you with dull eyes and was quick to put his shoes on, walking out of the front door, eager to leave until you stopped him with your hand.

“Let’s talk about this Seishiro.” you said, fingers digging into the sleeves of his jacket.

“There is nothing to talk about.” “Listen to me.” Silence passed over the both of you until you were the first one to break it, with you taking the support of the door frame while Seishiro stood outside your door; the two of you not caring if there were neighbors to hear or not.

“I told you that I wanted something simple. You just had to go ahead and complicate it.” he muttered, biting through the words that left his mouth.

“I told you.” He looked at you, your eyes casted down to the floor as salty drops from your eyes fell on it.

“I had told you this was a bad idea and you’re blaming me for it? The last time I checked, you were the one selfish enough to demand something of me when you knew I couldn’t give it-”

“Then why didn’t you stop it?”

He stared into your eyes, searching for answers. Answers that you weren’t ready to give nor ready to talk about.

“Exactly.” was all he said, feet stepping away from yours until the distance became bigger and he had disappeared out of your sight.

Closing the door, you went towards your book, turning over the crumpled page; the imprint of his fingernails over the word of ‘affection’; tears pouring down your face at the wasted love you were ready to give him but at the cost of it not being accepted and a broken heart.

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pashminalamb · 13 days

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𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐈𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐑𝐒.

𝐄𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝟏

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐅𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 : 𝐍𝐚𝐠𝐢 𝐒𝐢𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨, 𝐀𝐢𝐤𝐮 𝐎𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫, 𝐈𝐭𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐑𝐢𝐧.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 : 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞 : 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐖𝐜 : 𝟓.𝟑𝐤; 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝, 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐟 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐫𝐞-𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : 𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖, 𝐌𝐃𝐍𝐈, 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞.

୨⍣୧｡ (𝐀/𝐍) : 𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐜𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 (𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭), 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬, 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐬, 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐝 !!

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬 : 𝐬𝐡𝐞/𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐬, 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐲, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐬 (𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐢), 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐧𝐮𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐲 (𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐢𝐤𝐮'𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭), 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞, 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐬 (𝐢𝐧𝐣𝐮𝐫𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝) , 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐬, 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫, 𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐑𝐢𝐧'𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 - 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐂𝐍𝐂, 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤 (𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐚), 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬, 𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠, ��𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐤.

୨⍣୧｡ 𝐃𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐞, 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤.

𝐍𝐚𝐠𝐢 𝐒𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨

‘Maybe if I turn to the side and angle my hips right then… it still isn’t of any use is it.’

You had tried to pose yourself in the mirror for over an hour now, trying to look and convince yourself that you could see yourself differently than what others had said.

‘That shirt isn’t the right one for her, her tummy is showing.’

‘Those jeans? They look like they’re about to rip from that weight.’

‘Does she even have a boyfriend?’

‘Who could love her.’

Memories of their words playing in your head as tears burned your eyes, you took a look at yourself in the mirror. Be it at the gym, the street, the mall or standing alone in the room with no one in it; you could feel their lingering gazes on you.

Stomach out of the rim of your panties, thighs thick enough to rub against each other as you stood in front of the object that couldn’t lie to you, making you face who you really were. There were times when you had gone shopping with your friends, an excited smile on their face as they told you how gorgeous you looked with the dress, not to mention the compliments you would receive from your boyfriend on the times that you had gone out with him.

Were they lying to you?

No one would want to have an honest opinion in their face would they?

This wasn’t a body worth revealing… it had to be covered.

Picking out the nearest hoodie and a set of loose pajamas, you wore them, turning to look at yourself in the mirror once more.

Arms? Covered. Tummy? Covered. Thighs? Covered.

Sadly, it didn’t feel like your true self, but it did keep you safe from questioning your self worth.

‘Were you that worthless because of your body?’ the thought making you want to curl up on the bed and cry, shutting the world out under your sheets, wishing that the hugging of a pillow would comfort you in some way.

Nagi knew something wasn’t right when he had entered the house, the air around him filling with tension as silence passed in the house.

Something wasn’t right.

Coming to sit on the couch, he noticed that you were not to be seen anywhere, footsteps usually padding over to where he was to help him with his bag or to arrive with an ice pack or a first aid kit in case he had injured himself. Looking around you were nowhere in sight, not in the gaming room, hands secretly pressing onto the buttons of his consoles playing a game that he had saved before leaving, nor in the kitchen, his attention coming on the closed door of your shared bedroom.

The door was never closed.

Something had to be wrong.

Opening the door, he was greeted by the darkness of the room. Coming around the bed, he watched the slight jumping of the covers, a sniffle accompanying every small movement. Crouched on the floor he placed a hand on you, making you pause.

“Belle…” he muttered, the other pulling at the rope that hung from the lamp; illuminating the room dimly. Peeking out of the overs, you covered the rest of your body, the whites of your eyes tinged with red.

You had been crying.

“Tell me what's wrong.” he asked softly, trying to pull the covers under your chin, stroking your hair for comfort as you said nothing, turning your gaze away from him.

No answer… he was going to have to be more patient with you.

“Hm… why is Belle sad today?” he asked, dragging the husky plush that was placed in the middle of the bed; pushing the nuzzle of it into your face gently.

“Chibi sei wants to know what made Belle sad. Doesn’t he?” he asked, turning the plush towards his head. It was a childish tactic and display, but it had never failed to release the tension in the air or make you open up. Lifting one of your hands, you played with one of its ears ; Seishiro’s eyes catching a hold onto the attire you had.

Oversized hoodie that swallowed your body, the sleeves hanging loose off your arms, the hint of the hems of the pajamas peeking out from the corner of the blanket.

Lips forming into a thin line, he racked his brain for a question, attempting to make it subtle and not forceful.

“Are you cold?”

You shook your head. The duvet was warm enough and with Nagi’s body heat, it felt better to sleep with thin layered clothes.

“You know that hoodie is thick and you’ll sweat in that right?” he asked, pinching the sleeves of the hoodie, pulling your hand towards him as your eyes shifted to his. Nuzzling his cheek into the palm of your hand he laid a gentle kiss on it, making you nuzzle into the pillow.

“You know you can talk to me right?” he cooed, trying to make you open up to him. “Hm?”

“Tell me what’s wrong.”

You didn’t respond.

“Did you eat anything?” Nagi asked, your eyebrows pinching at his question, your lips shifting into a frown, a growl coming from your stomach catching the attention of him and you, causing your face to heat up as you retracted your hand back quickly, placing it on your stomach in embarrassment.

“Your tummy wants food.” Seishiro said.

“It’s just upset.” you replied.

“Liar. You didn’t eat anything. C’mon let’s go order something.” he said, getting off the floor and pulling the sheets off you.

“Fast food will make me fat. I want to lose weight, Sei.” you mumbled the words catching off guard.

“I’m eating with you though aren’t I? We can both be fat together.”

“You work out and play football. It's not the same as me.”

“But-”

“It's not.”

“Starving yourself isn’t the solution-”

“What other choice do I have?! You have the body of a fucking greek god while everyone looks at me like I’m some kind of a vile thing. I go to the fucking gym but can’t wear push up bras around the gym like some girls do ‘cause I know what people will say about my body; can’t walking around like a fucking human being cause of this stupid belly and-” your voiced cracked as you curled more into yourself on the bed.

“I… I’m just… tired.”

“It seems like my belle has forgotten her purpose.” Seishiro said, sighing; a hand coming to stroke your hair.

“People… come in all shapes and sizes, Belle. ‘N the first time we met, you called me a tall fucker. You remember that?” he asked, gray eyes blinking at you as he continued to talk, the memory of the time you had bumped into him in university a few years back coming to mind.

“People… aren’t always kind; since the world comes with its own cruelty… I’ve even had some people tell me to go die… or how I’m a terrible football player.”

“But you play well!” you said.

“Some people don’t seem to think that, do they?” he asked with a tiny smile.

“But you love me the way I am… even if you call me an overgrown manchild… or a tree fucker…”

“So why can’t it be the same when it comes to you?” he asked, face coming close to yours. “I know… I know what you’re talking about. Even if we both experience different things… I hear you… I feel you… and I know it. People aren’t always the best to you… but I’ll always be here for you… and despite what they say, it can’t make me love you any less and… that’s what matters doesn’t it?”

Simple words had held a significant meaning. And this was one of them, the explanation of it being solely that of one person yet it erased the seeds of self doubt from your mind as he kissed your nose, lips and throat, kissing you through the hoodie on your stomach.

He wouldn’t admit it out loud but he loved the feeling of resting his hands on your soft stomach when you would sit in the empty space between his thighs, playing a video game as he ran his fingers on your belly. He wasn’t a fan of skinship… yet it was something he loved doing, placing his head on your shoulder while his hands rested on the softness of your hips. It was something that made you all the more loveable and the need to be protected, the river of memories being broken by another growl of your stomach from not having eaten anything all day.

“My (y/n)’s tummy is hungry. I’m… not a fan of vegetables, but I can make a salad for the both of us. I don’t want you to starve yourself…” he pouted, making you snort.

Ruffling the gray tresses of his hair, you got up from bed, taking his hand into yours.

“Let’s get what you want. I’ll eat.” you said, removing the hoodie with silent relief flooding Seishiro as he smiled at you, getting up and pulling you off the bed, setting you between his thighs, his hands resting on your belly as you laid your head against his chest as he tapped away on ordering what he wanted with additional ice creams, knowing that a sweet tooth could brighten your day even if it meant getting sick with a sore throat. He loved running his hands on your body, his fingers digging into the softness of your curves during the times he had been intimate with you; or the soft morning where he would curl his arms around your stomach, the plush skin making him smile as he nuzzled into the nape of your neck, thinking how this would be the home of your future children.

It was the first step to starting a family; how could he ever hate it when it was the only thing that could make him into a father?

Starting a family with you… that wouldn’t be so bad, the smile on your face as you tried to give him some of your ice cream as you turned around on his lap.

It could wait, but it didn’t seem like he would stop dreaming about it anytime soon.

𝐀𝐢𝐤𝐮 𝐎𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫

“So, what makes you like the summer?” the host asked as Oliver settled into the cushioned seat, arms crossed over his chest, his feet resting on the foot support of it.

“Hot girl summer starts with the official bikini season.” he said with a grin causing the host to laugh. “That and Stockholm gets dark when winter approaches, only a few hours of sunlight during the day and the later half, you just feel… like you have nothing to do you know?”

‘Official bikini season.’ you scoffed, turning off the television, going towards the bathroom.

Washing your hands in the sink, you took a look at yourself in the mirror, turning your head from side to side.

Running your hands on the side of your face, you could feel the soft layer of small hairs on the side of your cheeks, the thin layer of peach fuzz hair brushing the pads of your fingertips. There were reasons for peach fuzz to exist, with one of the reasons being to regulate body temperature, the research you did saying so; proving that there were necessities for such a thing to exist… yet it hindered your confidence knowing that you had it.

This was not what you had in mind for hot girl summer.

Scrolling through your phone, you watched many videos, each recommending what you could do.

Taking the razor to the side of your face, you knew the drill. Drag it up and then shave the sides of your forehead along with the sides of your cheeks; yet you hesitated.

Was this really necessary?

It was going to be an endless cycle of it being once shaved, repeating it all over again. Watching videos about having body hair seemed to cheer you up about your body, making you feel confident, yet you couldn’t help the hint of doubt that sat at the back of your brain. Bikini season… girls looking pretty with long shaved legs, not a hint of scars raising their arms that were body hair free, making people’s heads turn; your friends posting pictures of the summer as they sat in their beach shorts and bikinis, playing the salty water of the sea or eating ice cream or catching a fish with barbequed evenings.

Something that you wanted to do but couldn’t. Staring down at your thighs, you watched how they had become thick, taking more space as you sat up.

Maybe it was time you stopped wearing shorts.

Over a period of a week you noticed everything about you, the scars on your body caused from scraping your knees during the times of your childhood, cursing at yourself when you were younger for not listening to your mother’s advice when she had told you to slow as you ran fast until you fell down or climbed trees and scraped your knees. Pulling out your phone, you did a thing that you wished you never did.

Search on Aiku Oliver, your fingers set to work as they swiped across the screen.

Tapping on images, you scrolled through pictures looking at some that were released to the public by anonymous sources or the paparazzi as he was on his way out of a club with another girl or the time he was caught having lunch or holding a girl’s jacket. Tossing your phone aside on the bed, you engulfed yourself into the sheets, knees to your chest, tears pooling in your eyes. You knew you were being unreasonable, Oliver’s notorious dating history was not a secret, the media covering all of it; with a few casual relationships of your own to add onto your side of the dating life experience but the there was a difference between dating a band member in college and a football player that the girls of the world were crazy about. It wasn’t about judging him for who he had dated but the common factor of what all of them had; beauty. Drifting off to sleep, you were unaware of the unlocking of the front door.

Oliver stood, scrolling through your search history. He didn’t want to disturb your sleep, but the tears on the pillow had him anxious. He knew it was wrong, relaxing into the plush sofa of the living room; yet it didn’t stop him from gritting his teeth when he saw your search history filled with research on him and his past.

‘Oliver and Stephanie - new couple of the year.’

‘Aiku and Minzo were seen leaving the theater.’

He knew his reputation wasn’t the cleanest, yet you hadn’t spoken to him about it, going with the flow of events and things rather than questioning things for the way it had been before you had met him.

Waking up, you knew your eyes were feeling swollen; calling for two cold spoons. Throwing the sheets off you, you noticed your phone was nowhere in sight.

Must’ve left it on the counter or something.

Walking into the living room, you watched as Aiku bit the bottom of his lip, hands holding your phone; his eyes going top to bottom as if he were reading something. You felt yourself snap out of the aftermath of your slumber, feet ready to break into a run towards him to snatch your phone away. Speed walking towards the couch, you held the top of it, pulling it away from his grasp, clicking it shut. The two of you said nothing as you stood in front of him, while he looked ahead, letting out a sigh.

“Are you… having second thoughts?” he broke the silence, palms rubbing on the surface of his pants.

“What second thoughts?” you quipped back, sitting on the armchair next to the sofa, pushing your legs to your chest.

“I know I don’t have a clean slate when it comes to women but are you judging me on who I was or with before I met or even knew you?” he asked, looking at you.

“It would be a lie if I said I wasn’t.” you replied. “But that isn’t the whole truth either.”

He cocked his head to the side, giving you a confused expression.

“I don’t judge you Oliver. What I judge is your taste in women. Stephanie and Minzo… were models; any guy would be lucky to have them. Not to mention they look flawless and you’re a football player. Usually they go for models or rather anyone they want to have and… it just makes me question why you’d settle for me. I don’t have anything to bring to the table except historical facts and boring talks about ruins and I look like the grinch who stole christmas.” you trailed, looking at the wooden floor.

Letting out a sigh, Oliver got up from the sofa, crouching on the floor in front of you, pulling a hand away from your knees.

“Take a bath with me?”

“I don’t want to…” you said softly, looking to the corner to avoid his eyes. Taking his shirt off, he threw it at you, making you squeal and scrunch your nose in disgust as you threw the dried sweaty shirt on the floor.

“Now you’re dirty too.”

You gave him glare getting up to go to the other bathroom when he came up behind you dragging to the one that you both showered in.

You settled on the far end of the tub, legs hanging over the ledge of it while Oliver sighed, relaxing into the hot water of it, bubbled scattered around the both of you on your insistence along with a colored bath bomb, the water looking white as milk.

“Wanna tell me why is the grinch sad?” he asked, raising his eyebrows making you sink your back into the water, arms covering your chest and thighs clenching together at the remark.

“Or should I ask for a cup of cold water…?” he trailed, inching closer to you until he bumped his shoulder with yours. Rubbing his scruff against your shoulder making you squirm, he whispered.

”please… Can I have a cup of cold water, Bambi?”, making you bite your lip to hide a smile that he didn’t let go unnoticed.

“Please bambi?” he pouted, leaving a kiss on your shoulder.

“Stop.” you whined, pulling away when his arm came around your shoulder, pulling you into him.

“Tell me what made you upset,” he said abruptly. “No more hiding.”

Taking a breath, you let your arms fall on your side; giving in.

“You and I don’t make sense, Oliver. Compared to your exes, I have nothing in bargain for it… I don’t have long legs that are skinny… My thighs are twice the size when I sit down and I have to second think about everything I wear… and that’s just my body. And my face…” you said, running a hand across your cheek, feeling the small hairs under the pads of your fingers.

“It's not meant for bikini season.”

You were caught off guard when he licked the side of your cheek and bit into it, making you slap his bare chest in disgust, cupping some of the water in your hand, you swiped at your cheek as he smiled at you. Moving his hand from your shoulders he placed it on your thigh, squeezing the flesh of it.

“You have no idea how much I love having these around my head do you?” he teased, kissing the side of your neck. Pulling away his head from your shoulder, he watched your flustered expression, hand traveling to pull yours away from your chest, entwining his hands with yours, legs dangling off the ledge of the tub.

“Why do you stay with me?” he asked, his thumb rubbing circles into your hand.

“What brought this up?”

“It's obvious isn’t it. To begin with; defender of Japan is also a playboy. And… I have a lot of leg hair.” he said.

“Where is all this coming from-”

“Not to mention you’re dating a freak with two different colored eyes.” he said, heterochromatic orbs staring into yours.

“For beginners, you are a man. And nearly every man does have an obnoxious amount of leg hair as well as on their forearms, chest and not to mention facial hair is normal. And second… your eyes are literally one of your best features. Freak or not, they are pretty.” you argued, pulling your hand out of his grip, grabbing his face instead, hands placed on both of his cheeks as he held your wrists in a firm yet gentle grip.

“That’s how I feel about you.”

“Your thighs look great. Biting them and licking them is secondary; I like having my hand on it when we’re outside or when you let me sleep on them. So what if they’re twice the size when you sit down? They feel good under my hands and no one else can touch it anyway.

As for peach fuzz…most women have it and… ” he said, nuzzling his nose into the side of your cheek and kissing it. “Facial hair is normal.”

There was no arguing with him, was there? A small creeping on the corner of your face.

“Seems like the history genius is tongue tied.”

“You make a good point… Olive oil.”

He bit into your cheek, making you squeal while you splashed water at him, with him grabbing you by the chin giving you a gentle kiss, thumb rubbing on the corner of your face.

“Let’s get out of the tub or fingers will start to look like raisins.”

𝐈𝐭𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐑𝐢𝐧

‘Do you know who is in the changing room?’

‘I heard, she is Itoshi Rin’s girlfriend…’

‘She didn’t look like the pedigree did she?’

‘I don’t know, we’ll just have to wait for her to come out and see for ourselves. She is trying on gior’s new dress…’ the shop attendant trailed, the outline of her shoes and shadow could be seen from the gap under the door as you pulled up your shirt to stare at the mirror in front of you.

Lines of different shades decorated your skin, noticeable on the curve of your rear, the sides of your hips and your stomach. It didn’t help that the same lines littered on your arms that were now exposed from the usual sleeves you had covered yourself with when you went out.

Slipping on the sleeveless dress Rin had selected off the shelf as he ushered you to the changing rooms; you tried it on by taking a look at yourself in the mirror.

The dress hugged your figure perfectly, the fabric of it pretty in every way, but despite its elegance, you could feel a frown on your lips at the peek of the lines, cascading down your shoulders. Running a hand on the surface of your skin, you could feel the small bumps of ingrowths, something that you had always felt ashamed of. The neck of the dress was low, exposing a bit of the lines that were littered on your chest. Taking a step back you traced the lines that were seen on your body that the dress hadn’t covered; the sight making you want to crawl out of the skin that was supposed to give you shape.

‘Hasn’t she been in there for long enough?’

Three firm knocks and you heard it.

“(y/n), is there a problem with the dress?” Rin asked, hand resting on the door.

“No, it's fine !! Just wrapping it up !!” you said nervously, reaching towards the side of it to pull down the zip.

“Step out. I want to see.” Rin demanded, making you pause. All he could hear was silence on the other side of the door. Not hearing a response, he knocked once more while the attendants of the store stared at him, feeling embarrassed and surprised at the sight of him having to coax you out of the room.

“(y/n), come out.” he asked once more.

Gritting your teeth, you knew there was no arguing with Rin. You didn’t want him to see you. Not like this. Not when you knew you couldn’t stand to see yourself in the mirror.

“No.”

Silence passed on the other side of the door as you could Rin mutter.

“Could you leave us alone?” followed by the footsteps of attendants as they walked away from the changing room.

‘It’s so embarrassing to be dating someone with that much of a low self esteem isn’t it?’

‘She is so lucky; yet such a waste.’

You could feel your head hung low as Rin knocked on the door again.

“(y/n), unlock the door. No one’s here except me.” he asked again, a hand resting on his hip and he bit the corner of his lip in thought, beginning to worry that maybe the shopping trip had gone south. He knew that you shied away from his touches, demanding to wear clothes that covered every inch of you, even if the weather was hot, demanding that the two of you be under sheets with the lights off when things had escalated in the bedroom along with the fact that you were skittish around his touches. Did his touch disgust you?

Sighing, he was about to knock again when he heard the click of the lock moving, the door opening to reveal a crack and your face from behind it, the corners of your eyes tinged red as you kept the door partially open, not revealing anymore of you.

“Are they gone?” you asked.

Placing his fingers on the door, Rin slipped his fingers in, curling on the edge of the door, pulling it away from your grip, making you step back into the changing room as he closed the door behind him, bolting it shut.

There was no room to escape, his well built figure in front of you, blocking the door as you turned your back to the mirror. Hands placed on either side of your shoulders, Rin made you turn to the mirror as you shook your head slightly, your hands coming up to push him away as he caught both your wrists, turning you around to the mirror.

Watching you squirm, he knew you felt uncomfortable, your stubbornness showing as you avoided eye contact with the reflection of the both of you.

Placing his hand under your chin, he made watch the both of you, teal eyes burning into yours through the reflection. His plan set into motion to rid it once and for all because it had been dragged out for long enough. He knew he had to be patient, yet it was thin. It was now or never.

“Tell me. Do you hate my touch that much?” he asked, his face coming close to yours.

“No.”

“Liar. You always avoid it. For what?” he asked, nibbling on your ear.

You couldn’t say anything; how could you? If you couldn’t stand the sight of yourself how would that be a reason for him to stay?

“Answer me, puppy.”

You could feel the bitter words on your tongue, ready to spill every detail as his teal eyes blinked into yours, in worry, anger and adoration.

“I… I don’t hate your touch. I- just. I…” you tried to form the words as tears formed on the bottom of your lash line.

“I just don’t feel like you should touch my body. It doesn’t deserve it.”

Rin blinked once then twice, watching as a tear escaped, crossing your cheek. Reaching to your side, he licked it leaving a searing kiss to the side of your cheek.

“Tell me about your body,” he said. “Run your hands on it and I want to know everything. What you like and hate. Skip over one detail and I won’t spare you.”

Hishands resting on your hips as he watched you.

Running your hands on your shoulders, you were about to speak when he had interrupted you.

“Look into my eyes. Look away and I’ll punish you.”

Staring into his teal eyes through the reflection, you gulped before beginning.

“I hate the lines on my arms. I don’t like the sight of it.”

“Hm.”

“They’re… they’re on my chest as well. And I hate it.”

“Mhm.”

“I hate the bumps on my skin. Ingrowths.”

“Mhm.”

“They’re there nearly everywhere on my body, my shoulders, ass, hips, thighs, arms, stomach… and I… just don’t feel like they should be seen. The dress is beautiful but it isn’t meant for someone like me. I just… I’m… I’m sorry. I can’t have the self esteem that you expect out of me. I don’t have a refined taste either so I don’t understand why you would stick around.” you trailed, turning around to face him, his hand pinning you in the same position.

“Here’s how it's gonna go. This.” he stated, running his hands from your hips to your thighs. “Is my body. Now tell me what you like about her.”

Pondering over the thought, nothing came to mind.

“It’s nothing extraordinary-” you hissed with a moan as you felt Rin sink his teeth into your exposed shoulder.

“Since you haven’t been her treating well enough, I’ll do it instead.” he said, taking a deep breath. Placing his hand around your shoulders, he could feel you squirm, his fingertips digging into the skin of it lightly.

“I like when her voice is calling out my name when I bite into these; and I like having an arm around these during movie nights on the couch.”

His hands moved south, coming under your breasts.

“I love having my arms around these in the morning. Not to mention when I lick them, I do feel the lines on my tongue; soft and sweet. But she makes me turn off the light and I can’t see them. She inches away from me when I’m sleeping with a pillow in the middle of the both of us, but we can change that.” he stated, as he ran his hands in the middle of your stomach, digging his fingers into it when he felt you squirm from his fingers again.

Moving his hand to your stomach, he massaged a part of it making you moan while the other came to cover your mouth.

“Shhh. Can’t be loud in here, puppy.” He said, “You’re really sensitive here aren’t you? The way you call out for me when I’m pounding into you and squeezing here.” he added, adding pressure as he rolled the flesh between his fingers, drawing another moan out of you.

“But no” he dragged out mockingly; “You just have to turn off the lights. Deny me from seeing my body, deny me pleasure. If I put some brats in here, would you love it more?” he taunted, placing kisses on the side of your neck.

“These.” he said, hands moving from your stomach to the side of your hips, dragging his palms across your thighs as his fingers dug into the plush area lightly.

“I love having them around me. Wanna eat you out for hours, make your thighs shake when you cum, or pound you against a wall when we’re at home. I don’t care if you hate it. This body is mine. She. is. mine. And you treat with the respect, kindness and love she deserves. Step out of line and I’ll make sure you learn it the hard way. Do I make myself clear, puppy?” he asked grimly, squeezing the side of your hip.

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, Rin.”

“Good girl.” he praised, kissing the side of your head.

“Now step out and walk with me. Throw the clothes you came in into the bag, we’re going somewhere. I’ll be at the front.”

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