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romanticintheory · 2 days

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HI I JUST READ YOUR "SIMON BETRAY YOU" AND YOU KNOW WHATTTT IT HURTS SOO GOOD OMG THANKS FOR MAKING THATT SJWISHWBSHSJSBWJSBWBS

...

and.. maybe can you write for a part two? pleaseee🥺

HIII TYSM IM SO GLAD YOU ENJOYED!!! here's a pt 2! i am very sick at the moment, though, so this might be a bunch of gibberish (i sincerely apologize if so). hope you like it <3

simon riley betrays you pt. 2

simon "ghost" riley x reader || pt. 1 || masterlist

☆ ☆ ☆

-miraculously, they let you go.

-you half expected someone to drag you out of the car with the barrel of a gun pressed against your temple with the intent to fire, but no. after a few excruciatingly long hours alone with your arms and legs bound, someone new came to cut your ties and let you loose.

-maybe they were just bad at their job, you thought. after all, why would they let you, essentially a witness, go free without any repercussions?

-a few years pass. you try to move on, but its impossible when your entire world was shattered in one night.

-you never heard back from your father since then, but that wasn't the thing that hurt the most. you couldn't go a single day without thinking about the sting of betrayal. any happy moment you had was spent comparing the time you felt that same feeling with him, before anything in the world was wrong to you.

-what's worse, there was something telling you that you shouldn't tell anyone about it even if you wanted to. a voice in your head kept telling you that maybe, maybe they're keeping you on a leash. maybe someone was watching you at this very moment ready to take you out the moment you spilled your experiences.

-in a way, your fears are confirmed when you meet simon again miles away from the last place you lived. you had moved for this exact reason; you never wanted to see his face for as long as you lived.

-it happens when you're walking alone in the street. you moved to this area specifically because you heard it was quieter and, more importantly, safer. but how much of that could you escape, really?

-your attacker approaches you as you're making your walk home from work, a kind of confidence on his face that makes the common individual want to roll their eyes.

-"what's a sweet thing like you doing out alone at night, huh?" he asks, his footsteps staggered like he's had one too many drinks.

-you give him the usual speel of, "oh, my friends are waiting for me... yeah, i've got a boyfriend. haha, i'm okay, no need to accompany me, thanks."

-your soft attempts at rejection only seem to agitate him, because next thing you know he's stepping toward you and putting a hand on your arm with a bone-crushing grip.

-"c'mon jus' let me-"

-his voice is cut off by the sound of a loud thud and the stranger's yelp of pain. it takes you a second, but you realize the defense on your behalf came from beside you.

-oh, thank god.

-you and your now injured attacker now adjust your gazes to sit on the silent newcomer. just like that, your settled sense of dread has come back and increased tenfold.

-there he was, with that stupid mask over his face and his hands curled into fists for preparation of what he was going to do next if the man didn't scurry off.

-"you'll leave," he says darkly under subtle pants, as if he ran before coming to your rescue. "if you know what's good for you."

-the stranger wastes no time in running off into the night, leaving you with your worst nightmare.

-for a while, you both stare at each other like you can't believe the other is real. it takes everything in you not to cry or beg him for answers. no, after everything you worked for, you're not going to throw away everything you built in the past few years to recover from him just to throw it all away now... right?

-"why are you here?" you ask coldly. "come to finish the job?"

-although your eyes were icy and your questions came with a rigid tone, there was genuine fear in your question. what if the soldier that untied you wasn't supposed to? what if you were supposed to be dead all those years ago?

-"no. never."

-even though he knows the reason why, his heart still hurts at the thought of you believing he'd just up and kill you like that.

-"really? that's rich," you scoff, except you're terrible at hiding the tremble in your breath and the tremors traveling through your body.

-spotting your growing fear, he scrambles for something, anything, to make you fear him less.

-"i was worried, that's all. after that night," he pauses, eventually deciding to skip the details of what he did to your father. "i didn't know where you went. thought i could just get over it, but i guess i just knew i needed to check in on you just in case."

-you resist the urge to roll you eyes. "right. you're back again to 'check in on me'? to come back and meddle in my life again?" you're struggling to keep your tears back as they form in your eyes. "you've already taken so much. how selfish can you be?"

-he stares at you for a moment before slipping his hand into his pocket and taking out a gold watch that belonged to your dad.

-"i'm sorry about your father, but you have to understand that he-"

-"not that, simon. it was never that," you push his hand away and the offer that came with it. his eyes became confused. "i mean you. it's always been you. you just come into my life telling me you love me, that you want to be with me so much and then just take that all away? and you never even bothered to tell me it was a lie, just let me get tied up by some stranger to be left alone and scared!"

-there's a new look in simon's eyes at your words, but it's hard to decipher them from behind the mask.

-"it wasn't a lie," he says slowly, lowering the hand with the watch in it back to his side.

-"oh, please." the trembling has not died down in the slightest. "i bet you're still mad that worker of yours took pity on me and let me leave before you could do anything about it. like i said, back to finish the job."

-your eyes are now trained on the ground. there was a conflicted feeling in your body at the moment. on one hand, this was the man that let you get tied up and left in a car while he "handled" your father. on the other, this was the man you loved. the one who was kind to your ever desire, who always understood you in ways you never knew possible.

-"i told them to let you go," he finally manages.

-"what?"

"i..." he hesitates. "i told my captain that if i was going to give them your father's location, they were to let you go no questions asked when the whole ordeal was over with." and it was true. he hated even imagining poor you, being interrogated by his colleagues in an isolated, barren room. you had been through enough.

-and even if you had been a part of your father's scheme, there was a part of simon that loved you too much to care (though he'd never admit it to himself).

-it was a good thing price trusted his judgment. he didn't know what he would've done had he said no.

-the tears are now streaming down your face and you can do nothing to stop it. it all felt like so much. you were so, so confused. if he did love you, why did you feel this way? how much of this could you trust?

-cautiously, he goes to wipe the tears away from your face, murmuring a quiet, "hate it when you cry." for a second, it was a familiar feeling. you felt like you were back in your shared flat with simon while having a breakdown over life's struggles. in moments like those, you never would have expectated that life's struggles could take the form of simon himself.

-you can't help but lean into his touch. maybe you were insane for allowing him to touch you like this, but you wanted nothing more than to let him into your life again. the resolve you worked so hard to build was crumbling away the longer you spent with him.

-"the reason it took so long for me to find you..." he's holding your face in his hands, now. "for so long, i thought i ought to leave you alone. i know i should. i wasn't lying about when i said i was worried if you were still alive, but," he swallows the lump in his throat before continuing. "i also miss you. 'nd i know, 's incredibly selfish of me after everything i've done to you, but i can't help it."

-one of his hands leaves your face to slide the mask and balaclava off his face. there he was again, his aged brown eyes and soft jawline, the sides of his face littered with small scars you still remember to this day.

-"i'll make it up to you," he whispers. "anything you ask, i'll answer. about my past, your father, anything. you ask me to get you something, i'll have it for you wrapped all nice 'nd pretty. hell, i'll get on my knees and pray to you if you order me to, love."

-it was like your nightmare turned into a fantasy, having him here begging for your forgiveness.

-"anything you want, i want to give to you. jus' let me be a little selfish, too."

-you bite your lip as you think it over. you know the correct answer would be a clear, hard no, but you can't bring yourself to do it. not after all those nights wishing he was encasing you in his arms again, whispering all the things he adored about you as you drifted off into sleep.

-as much as you shouldn't be believing him, you do.

-"...anything?" you ask hesitantly, and it takes everything in simon not to pull you in close and never let go.

-again. no, he needs to be sure he won't scare you off again.

-"anything," he promises, fingertips tracing the edge of your jawline.

-"okay," you agree, the tears finally having stopped flowing. happiness does not even begin to describe what simon was feeling. "for starters, you can walk me home."

-with the watch long forgotten and broken on the edge of the sidewalk, he holds your face for a bit longer before letting go. eventually, he offers his arm to you and you take it.

-there's a part of him that mourns the years lost that he could've had with you. maybe, if he came to you sooner, he wouldn't have to be so careful about being around you, now. but, no, these were the consequences of his actions.

-at the very least, you were still giving him a second chance, and he was intent on not fucking it up this time.

#call of duty imagine #call of duty x reader #cod x reader #cod imagine #cod mw x reader #simon riley imagine #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley imagine #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #ghost imagine #simon riley x you #simon ghost riley x you #ghost x you #cod angst #call of duty angst #simon riley angst #ghost angst #rarawrites

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nillegible · 2 days

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Threefold

(For @ladyteldra, who shoved me into this unexpected rabbit hole, but then stuffed it full of content to make me happy)

No one had noticed during the war, as wars were rather distracting. But it was hard not to notice when they got home.

What was left of home; it was still a work in progress.

At first Jiang Yanli excused it away as the magic of Lotus Pier going awry because of what it had been through, but by the second week of reconstruction she tracked down a copy of the Entail from one of the surviving caches.

It shouldn’t have mattered.

Jiang Cheng was the chosen Sect Heir, their Father had made that clear when Jiang Cheng turned fifteen, and Lotus Pier should know that.

(Except Lotus Pier would have felt Mother, then Father, then Jiang Cheng lose their cores here. It might have thought… Perhaps that would explain why…)

When she gently probes Wei Wuxian for his thoughts on their misbehaving inheritance, his face goes stricken and over the next week he dives into the scrolls himself, more thoroughly than she had.

Jiang Yanli had not meant to distract Wei Wuxian from his own self-loathing and his eerie ghost-brides, but that is what it amounts to, in the end.

“Do you think,” Wei Wuxian says finally, over dinner, eyes red and wild like he’s been drinking (clearly distinct, to her, from the red and wild from raising ghosts), “That when Wen Zhuliu. When he – that it broke what marks you as heir?”

Jinag Cheng stiffens at the reminder, and frowns at their brother. “Would that…? But BSSR fixed it.”

“What if it’s not the same core as before?” asks Wei Wuxian, vehemently. “Doesn’t it” he waves a hand towards their surroundings, “feel like it did when we were younger? Before you came of age?”

That’s exactly what it was, Jiang Yanli realizes. The magic of Lotus Pier felt familiar for all it was acting slantwise; it was exactly how it had been before the heir had been named.

“What does that mean, then?” asks Jiang Cheng, standing up. “I’m not the heir, then?”

“You shouldn’t be the heir,” Wei Wuxian says. “You should be the Sect Leader.”

“You’re saying the Lotus Pier doesn’t want me,” says Jiang Cheng. Jiang Yanli lays a hand on Jiang Cheng’s elbow.

Before she can speak a word, Wei Wuxian says, voice final, “No. I’m saying I think the Lotus Pier thinks you died.”

Their ravaged, gutted home is recovering steadily, with new disciples, new responsibilities, new buildings.

Their new Sect Leader and his right hand aren’t doing so well.

“If it thinks you’ll do better, then fine! Be the sect leader!” Jiang Cheng had yelled at Wei Wuxian one day, terrifying Wei Wuxian who insisted he didn’t have the right nor did he want to, and setting off quite a row (“Oh, so Lotus Pier just isn’t good enough for you, huh? Where DO you want to go then?”). Naturally, that escalated into a more physical fight, and when punches were landed and brothers elbowed in the gut and flipped onto their backs, swords were drawn (“You still won’t use your sword? What if I run you through with mine? Pick up your sword, goddamn you!”) which came to a screeching, horrific halt when Suibian unsheathed for an incensed Jiang Cheng.

Wei Wuxian had a lot to explain.

Jiang Yanli doesn’t think Jiang Cheng will ever forgive Wei Wuxian for this, but she patches them both up as best she can, listens while each rants about the idiocy and foolishness of the other. She talks down one little brother from his stated plan to find Wen Qing and make her switch the cores back, and coaxes the other one to rest with promises that she wouldn’t let Jiang Cheng try something like that while he sleeps (“I promise, you can sleep now, A-Xian, I won’t let him.” “Oh but HE can, HE can decide for me-!”)

“Since we’ve decided not to keep secrets from family,” she tells them, after a week of indulging them both in their childishness, “you should both know. The Jiang family has, now, in the direct line me and Jiang Cheng. And then there’s Wei Wuxian, son of Wei Changze, who was a shu-son of Grandfather’s and, technically, broke the oath he made when he left the sect that he would not have children of his own.”

Their faces, when that finally sinks in, makes her giggle.

[“So you could be Sect Leader, since Lotus Pier would accept you. This explains so much about Mother.”

“I told you that Uncle Jiang wanted it to be you! But…yeah. It really does.”]

[“Wait, so the Waterborne Abyss tried to grab you in Gusu… do you think that it wanted…”

(That particular conversation ended abruptly when the plank Jiang Cheng was standing on crumbles, dumping him into the river below.)]

[“Without Uncle Jiang’s mark on Jiang Cheng showing Lotus Pier who the heir is, I think it’s confused about who to pick,” Wei Wuxian tells them, after more time with scrolls and an unexpected visit to Meishan Yu and Gusu Lan sects. “Should it go with strength, or primogeniture? Dad was older than Uncle Jiang, but Shijie’s older than me. And I don’t have a core – but mine’s not gone, it’s still-”

Wei Wuxian shuts himself up before Jiang Cheng can, that time.]

For some reason, the issue seems to weigh more greatly on her and A-Xian than A-Cheng. Perhaps because even though Lotus Pier had not yet acknowledged Jiang Cheng as Sect Leader, the Jiang Sect had. And Sect-Leaderly duties did not wait on the convenience of an ancient dwelling and what may or may not dwell beneath the watery foundations.

Which is why it’s surprising when it’s Jiang Cheng who finds them the solution.

“Are you sure?” she has to ask him.

“Honestly, I always imagined that when I’m Sect Leader, Wei Wuxian would busy-body his way into doing half my work anyway. The only difference is that you can stay here at Lotus Pier and help instead of marrying out.” The sect leader of a clan could not, after all, marry out.

“You should thank me for getting the engagement called off, then!” says Wei Wuxian. “Can you imagine? If we went through with this, then we’d all be engaged to the peacock.”

“A-Xian,” she chides, and her brother looks at her sheepishly. The grin is more naturally like himself, and not like he’s forcing himself to act like he once did.

“Is that okay with you, A-Jie?” asks Jiang Cheng.

“Yes,” she tells them. She had wanted a husband, children, a family of her own. But asked to make this choice; her sect or herself, her brothers or a family that one day might be. She knew her answer. “When shall we do it?”

In the aftermath, very little changes.

The bemused Jiang disciples are told to address both Young Mistress Jiang and Wei-shixiong as Sect Leader also, which takes them some getting used to, but they adapt soon enough.

The civilians from Yunmeng think it’s splendid, and take great pride in their three Sect Leaders.

The other sects receive a letter informing them that Jiang Yanli, Jiang Wanyin, and Wei Wuxian were ‘…henceforth by mutual agreement, to be recognized as one entity, encompassing legal and spiritual dimensions alike. As leaders of the Jiang sect, they will jointly bear the responsibilities and obligations attached to this esteemed position.’ Naturally this brings about some interested speculation in their allied sects.

[“Are you alright, Wangji? Do not worry, there is no need for you and Xichen to do likewise, it is an old ritual meant to rejoin the branches of a Clan that are at risk of a schism, without the messy business of pruning one side to disallow heirs, or line adoption."]

[“How utterly absurd. That girl, and the Ghost Flute, to be acknowledged as Sect Leader Jiang, when little Jiang Cheng can barely fill the role himself? What is the world coming to. Fetch us some wine, boy.”]

[“No that is not a euphemism for them deciding to have an incestuous polyamorous marriage, Huaisang! It probably has to do with that thing they don’t talk about; though why the Wen were not eaten when they stepped foot in Lotus Pier we’ll never know.”]

#wip #JZX/Yunmeng Sibs #So maybe that cancelled engagement wasn't as cancelled as they thought #whoops #what can you do?#All credit to Lotus Pier's waterborne abyss go to Tel

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thephooka · 11 hours

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youtube

Happy Webcomic Day! My webcomic White Noise is a labor of love--according to Procreate, this page took me 15.5 hours to complete.* Here's a look into that process!

Some other notes:

The thumbnails are done on graph paper and I script while I do them--there is no separate written script for White Noise. I usually spent a couple hours on weekends as needed thumbnailing, sometimes at a coffee shop or at home listening to records.

I then set up the file in Photoshop, so I can lay in the text and use the template I have with bleeds already set up. The text is rasterized and I shuttle the file over to my iPad via Airdrop.

The bulk of the actual work is done in Procreate, which records timelapses that I sometimes share to my Patreon. I usually spend a couple hours most nights after my day job or on the bus commuting doing this.

Once everything art-wise is done, I shuttle the file back over to my desktop to re-set in the text, add a stroke around the speech bubbles (Procreate doesn't have that took fsr) and do the resizing/exporting for web.

On Sunday mornings I get up, queue the page and write the page descriptions. I don't spend any time on the page descriptions outside of that.

Also, this process goes for the whole first arc of White Noise. I'm done with that arc (which means you can binge the whole thing I'm js!!) and am experimenting with some different methods these days, but my workflow is still generally the same.

*Some more talk about the labor (and burnout) involved below the cut:

This particular page (and most of the pages I did in 2023) took a lot longer than normal because I was heading into a burnout period that I'm still lowkey in/recovering from. It's obvious to me now in retrospect watching the timelapse here and seeing how much noodling I'm doing and how much I'm struggling with the process, but at the time I was just very frustrated generally. When I'm not burned tf out pages take maybe 10 hours max.

2023 was a pretty stressful year--lots of big life changes, uncertainty, pet death, health issues--so it's no wonder it propelled me into burnout, but it just goes to show that even the slowest and steadiest pace is not sustainable forever. I've been doing one page a week following this general process for over a decade! And I stuck to that pace because I knew it was one I could maintain. But even so, by the end of this arc I found myself working more and more slowly, not really looking forward to the work, feeling anxious about being behind, unhappy with the finished work, and extremely annoyed with myself for not being able to give it my all right there at the finish line.

I did stop for a while after the epilogue and took a more or less complete break from drawing for about a month--the longest I have EVER gone without drawing, much less working on White Noise--which did help, but these days my ability to work is...inconsistent. I should probably take another total break, but I'm reluctant. What if my passion never comes back? What if people forget about WN? It's already pretty obscure, and with the general social media collapse, it's harder than ever to get people to read my work. Now that I've left Hiveworks, WN doesn't even get the benefit of being linked to other comics (although objectively very, very few readers actually got referred to my comic that way.) And frankly, I'm also just too proud to go too long without comic updates. I've always told myself, I might not be the best artist or the fastest worker or make a popular comic, but I'm consistent. Difficult to let that go.

This is all to say that webcomics are hard. We do them because we love them, we have stories to tell, we are seized with the human compulsion to create. We spend hours of our time, almost always on top of the paying work that allows us to eat, to make something that we then give away for free. It has consequences on us that the reader doesn't often see, no matter how careful we are about it. If you ask me, webcomics deserve to be valued more.

Happy Webcomic Day! Read webcomics!

#webcomics #comics #webcomicday #webcomic day #web comix #indie comics #wn comic #white noise #behind the scenes #art process #comic making #sorry about the vertical video Tumblr would not just let me upload the video file into the post #Youtube

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deusvervewrites · 1 day

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Escaping Gravity: Izuku went to Nighteye for a work study, but left after he insulted Ochako. And Ochako stole Overhauls Quirk during the raid, but Endeavor wasn't at the raid in canon. So who were Izuku and Ochako working under during the Overhaul Raid?

I was going to joke about the funniest possibility being that Uraraka was kidnapped and the entire Endeavor agency plus Midoriya descended on the Eight Precepts like a horde of locusts.

And then, as I gave my serious answer and researched canon a bit more, I realized it might not be a joke.

Because Midoriya wasn't there, Togata never encountered Eri, meaning that Nighteye never makes the connection regarding the origin of the Quirk-Destroying Bullets. This is important because that's what allowed the raid to happen--they didn't actually have any proof of the Eight Precepts selling the Quirk-Destroyers, it was conjecture from the groups that used it having made dealings with the Precepts in the past. Them seeing Eri covered in bandages is how Nighteye realized the origin of the human cells in the recovered drugs. Nighteye's clowenery only deepens the more I learn.

(Fun fact! Nighteye's investigation on the Precepts had only been happening for two weeks before the raid! That's a detail I forgot about!)

Without that connection, Nighteye is floundering to come up with something to actually pin the Precepts with while they continue to amass power. And Uraraka's relation to AFO was made public at Kamino. It's not a stretch for Overhaul to assume she has the ability to steal Quirks, meaning he can use her for the drugs as well.

(I doubt that would work with nowhere to transfer the Quirk to, but this guy thinks Quirks are caused by rats so he's clearly not the brightest)

Nabbing her on her way to--or, more likely, from the Endeavor Agency while she's tired wouldn't be that hard given the Eight Bullets' Quirks, especially if they ambushed her with the incomplete Quirk-Destroyer.

UA calls Endeavor to ask where Uraraka is, Endeavor replies that she was headed back to UA, they realize that means she's missing and both quickly mobilize. Endeavor finds the dart at the scene, compares notes with Fat Gum, and deduces why she was taken. From there, traffic cameras and similar means can help narrow down who took her and where, giving them plausible connection to the Precepts.

These also means there is a very funny possibility that the Nighteye Agency does not get to participate in this raid.

As for Midoriya, well, it's working out for Uraraka to be at Endeavor's Agency and he would absolutely refuse to sit out her rescue and the Endeavor's Agency is his best bet for that.

#asks #escaping gravity au

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eepwriting · 2 days

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thigh anon here, absolutely loved what you wrote so I'm back again!! might be too much idk but

could we please get another ivy fic, where the reader has feelings for him and there is some playful flirting between them and ivy, but they don't know if he's being serious so they break down and confess and turns out ivy also has feelings for them but was in the same boat of being unsure

ending with lots of reassurance and comfort (and maybe a passionate sex scene if it's not too much to ask 👀)

This Whole Time ✶ IV x GN! Reader

Warnings: nsfw, smut, intercourse

Omg hiii thigh anon!! I made sure to not delete your entire ask this time ha. Thank you as always 🤍

!! mdi !!

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✩°｡⋆˚⁺ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✩°｡⋆˚⁺ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✩°｡⋆˚⁺ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✩°｡⋆˚⁺ ⁺˚

You couldn’t deny the way your heart ached slightly every time you saw him.

He was always so kind, considerate of your thoughts and feelings. He was funny, charismatic, and handsome. The two of you had became friends almost 2 years ago, this little crush growing everyday. Sure, you could confess how you felt, but you knew you’d never recover if he didn’t feel the same. Maybe the two of you could remain friends if that was the case, but the reminder of absent attraction would always be at the back of your mind. You couldn’t bring yourself to think of your everyday life without him in it.

So, you remained just friends with him. You play along with his naturally flirty nature and pretend to not be affected by it, not letting him see how much you wished it was real. “Jokingly” flirting back. Just two friends joking around.

So when your phone buzzes with a text from him, inviting you over for “shit food and trash tv” you push your feelings down and think on the positive side: You get to hang out with your good friend!

Your heart hammers in your chest as you climb the stairs to his apartment later that night. It always seemed to do that before you saw him, only slowing down after sitting with him a while. You knock on his door before letting yourself in, kicking off your shoes at the door. IVs standing in the kitchen, leaned over, looking into his fridge. He hears your entrance and stands straight, closing the fridge door.

A smile reaches his eyes as he walks over, reaching out to pull you into a hug. He squeezes you tight, his fingertips lightly scratching up and down your back. “Hey, you.” His voice is quiet in your ear.

“Hi, how’ve you been?” Your hand squeezes his shoulder. He pulls away from you but keeps his hands on your hips. “Good, you?”

You nod, “Good. Hungry.”

“Well lucky you, I ordered your favorite.” He gently pushes you towards the living room, hands on your shoulders. Your eyes land on the coffee table, on it a small spread of food from your favorite take out place, plus your favorite drinks.

“Oh wowww, you’re really spoiling me, huh?” You laugh as you take a seat on the couch.

“I gotta give my best to my favorite person, don’t I?” He sheepishly shrugs before sitting down next to you. He grabs the remote, switching on the tv.

You hope he doesn’t notice the blush that rises to your cheeks. You watch the side of his face for a moment before reaching forward to open the food boxes in front of you.

You hear the theme song of a show you hate and glare over at iv. “Oh no, no.” You reach over him to pick the remote up, hitting the back button.

“What? I like that show.” He turns to you, his arm flying up to point at the tv.

You shake your head and snicker, “That show sucks, ivy. C’mon.”

“Oh that’s real rich coming from you. At least it has substance! Unlike what you watch.” He jokingly shakes his head in shame.

Your mouth opens in fake hurt, a hand reaching up to your neck as you gasp. “Wow. That’s quite rude, you know?” He just lets out a loud laugh as he pulls his mask up over his mouth to take a sip of his drink.

You settle on an early 2010s sitcom before grabbing a container of food and sitting further back on the couch.

Before you know it, the two of you are 4 episodes deep, food long gone. You sat with your back against the armrest, your legs lay over iv’s lap, who’s sat further down the couch. His hands rest on your calves, absentmindedly rubbing, occasionally squeezing whenever he laughs at something.

You watch as the two main characters share a loving moment towards the end of the episode. They vow to not let the small things break them apart, even the silly little conflict the episode had revolved around. You can’t help but to look over at iv as the people on screen share a kiss, wishing you could have a moment like that with him. You blatantly stare at him, too lost in the thoughts racing through your mind.

“Hey, what’s wrong.” You feel a squeeze on your knee.

You blink, your head shaking slightly as he looks at you with a look of concern. “Oh, uh, it’s nothing.” You shake your head again, looking back to the tv.

“No. It’s not nothing. You seem upset.” He pauses the tv and pulls you towards him by your legs. You couldn’t see your own face, but you felt that familiar ache in your chest, only assuming the look on your face matched what you were feeling.

“I’m okay. Just thinking about stuff.” You pull the sleeves of your sweatshirt over your hands, crossing your arms over yourself.

“What stuff? Sad stuff?” His brows furrow. Even under the mask you can see the pure concern.

You can’t believe you’re about to open up about this. You’re terrified but you don’t know how much longer you can keep up this act. Keep pretending that your entire mind, body and soul doesn’t yearn for the man next to you. You clear your throat, “You’ll think it’s stupid.”

“What are you talking about? Whatever it is, you can tell me. You know that right?” His hand rubs comforting circles over the side of your thigh.

You take a deep breath, your eyes close in a long blink before you speak. “Ivy. I like you. I really like you. More than a friend should ever like a friend.” You pause, your words getting caught in your throat. IV’s hand stops moving on your leg but he doesn’t say anything. “It’s okay if you don’t feel the same, but I owe it to myself to let you know. I love spending time with you but I can’t just act like I don’t have strong feelings for you, not anymore.”

You look at him, frozen in his seat. You’re screaming at him in your head. To say anything to you. To give you any sign that he really heard what you just said.

It feels like forever before he speaks. “How long? Have you felt this way?” His voice is quiet.

You shake your head, not expecting that answer. “Since I met you.”

He lets out a breath he seemed to be holding, his head falling forward. “You don’t know how long I’ve waited to hear you say that.” He pulls you to sit fully across his lap and you let him, heat crawling up your neck to your cheeks.

“What do you mean?” You blink at him.

“I mean, I really like you. I’ve never said anything because I was so sure you weren’t interested.” He reaches up hold the side of your face. “I flirt with you and try my damn best make you feel special, hoping maybe one day, I’d have the confidence to finally say something. Even if it meant the end of our friendship. I’ve always wanted to tell you.”

You want to pinch yourself, convinced you’re dreaming.

“So… this whole time we’ve both just been torturing ourselves?”

He laughs softly, his thumb swiping back and forth over your cheek. “I guess so.” His eyes repeatedly flick down to your mouth. “Funny how that works, huh?”

Your mind races with thoughts of surprise, confusion and pure happiness as you try to make sense of his words.

You notice the way his breath quickens as his hand slowly reaches up to pull his mask up over his mouth. You meet him halfway as he leans into you, your mouths meeting in a hesitant kiss. It starts slow, occasionally interrupted by shy smiles from both of you. He tilts his head when he feels you grip the back of his neck, letting his tongue swipe over your bottom lip. A quiet and low groan leaves him when his tongue finds yours. His hands run up and down your back, squeezing your sides occasionally.

He gently guides you to lay on the couch, his mouth never leaving yours. He half straddles your hips and lets you pull him down so his chest is against yours. His mouth moves to kiss your cheek, across your jaw and down the side of your neck. A breathy whine leaving your mouth when you feel his tongue press to your skin.

Your fingers hook into the belt loops of his jeans, pulling his hips to yours. You’re rewarded with a deep groan, his hips bucking into yours.

He pulls away from your neck breathlessly. “You’re sure you’re okay with this?”

You smile up at him and bring your hands up to cup his face. “I’m more than okay with this. Trust me. I’m just so happy that you feel the same.”

He nods his head and turns to press a kiss to your palm. “Me too.” His voice soft and sweet. His hand caressing your cheek and jaw before he pushes himself off you to stand, impatient hands working over the button and zipper on his jeans.

You take the opportunity to push your sweatpants and underwear down your legs, the two of you unabashedly watching each other undress.

He’s on you again before you know it, his mouth attaching to yours again. Your hands wander under his shirt to roam his back, fingertips digging into his shoulder blades. His hand cups your jaw as he kisses you as if you’re his life source. He presses his hips to yours firmly and you can’t stop the moan you let out into his mouth. The feel of his bare skin on yours making you impatient.

“Hold on, love.” He mumbles on your lips before pulling away from you. He grabs your hand and brings it to his chest. “I feel like my hearts gonna beat out of my chest.” He lets out a breathy laugh.

You feel his heart racing under your palm, yours not feeling much different. “It’s okay. Mine too.” You give him a small nod and smile. “I’ll help, okay?” You reach a hand between the two of you, your hand nudging his cock before you wrap your fingers around him. He lets out a deep breath at the contact.

Your hand slowly slides down his shaft and back up again, your thumb catching a bead of his arousal before swirling it around on his tip. He whines a needy mewl above you, his eyes closing. The sound only makes the ache between your thighs ten times worse. You want to watch him like this forever, but let’s be honest, you’d waited 2 years for this already and you were done being patient.

Your fingers continue working him as you bring your other hand to your mouth, gathering some spit in your palm. Your wet palm soon replaces your fingers, pumping him smoothly. He bucks into your hand, another whimper leaving his mouth. You spread your legs open further and angle your hips up.

He gets the hint, angling his hips down slightly, his hand guiding his cock to press against you. He locks eyes with you again before slowly pushing himself in halfway. He leans down to you, mouths connecting in a hot, open mouth kiss. He draws his hips back before he’s even fully buried, and snaps them back in with a quick thrust. It catches you off guard, fingers digging into his side, a moan muffled by iv’s mouth.

“I’m sorry, baby.” He breathes out and rests his forehead against yours. “I’ve just waited too long for this.” A groan punctuates his sentence. His cock slips in and out of you with ease as he picks up his pace. Your arms wrap around his shoulders, bringing him back down to you again. His quiet grunts sounding ever so nice in your ear. “I wanna look at you.” He says as he pushes himself up, hands gripping your sides as he looks down at you.

You can’t help but look down to where the two of you are connected, your teeth biting over your bottom lip as you whimper at the sight. Your hand slowly makes its way down to play with yourself, your eyes snapping up to look at iv.

He breathes out a huff and quickly nods his head. His attention fully on the way your hand moves over yourself, as well at how his cock glides in and out of you.

It doesn’t take long for that familiar feeling in your lower half to blossom. You could tell iv was on the edge as well, his movements loosing the fluidity they once had. He bends down to pepper small kisses on your cheek. “You gonna cum with me?” He hums as you quickly nod, your mouth opening in a silent cry, your climax crashing over you. Your hips buck up to him as you grip his bicep, a long string of moans leaving you.

IV’s release is right behind yours. His brows furrowed, mouth hung open slightly, eyes squeezed shut. He lets himself collapse over you, but still careful to not use his full weight. His head is in the crook of your neck, his breathing fast and shallow. You feel his hips spasm against yours, the movement sending a weak shock through you.

He presses a soft kiss to your cheek before pushing himself up. You both let out a soft groan as he pulls out of you. He looks down at you with a relaxed smile, his hand reaching out to smooth over the top of your head. “You’re telling me, we could’ve been doing that this whole time?” He chuckles.

You laugh, lightly nudging him with your knee. “I guess so.”

He helps you sit up before walking you to the bathroom, soaking a washcloth with warm water before he gently cleans you up. He helps you get dressed before running to the kitchen to get you some water.

He joins you back on the couch, his arm falling around your shoulders as you cuddle up to him. The two of you knowing you’d not regret the decision to open up about how you felt the whole time.

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✩°｡⋆˚⁺ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✩°｡⋆˚⁺ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✩°｡⋆˚⁺ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✩°｡⋆˚⁺ ⁺˚

This is looong sorry, I got a little carried away.

Absolutely loved this idea! Hope you enjoyed anon! 🤍

K. Bye bye.

#sleep token #sleep token worship #sleep token fic #sleep token x reader #sleep token smut #sleep token iv #iv sleep token #iv x reader

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vodika-vibes · 2 days

Note

tipping your chin to make you look into their eyes with a liiiiitle extra smut w/alpha-17 please (can you tell that i go feral for him? 🫠)

The Gambler

Summary: You're a high ranking official from one of the most wealthy corporations in the galaxy, and they have turned their eye on Kamino, sending you there to ensure that they get what they want. And, while there, you get what you want too.

Pairing: Alpha-17 x F!Reader

Word Count: 1969

Warnings: Smut, oral m receiving

Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni

A/N: Sorry that this took so long, I promise I didn't forget, I'm just slow sometimes. I hope you're still here, nonny.

“So, this is Kamino?” You prop your feet up on the table, and lean back to look out the window watching the rain streak from the sky. “I admit, aside from the cloning technology, I don’t see much here that’s worth our time.”

There’s a low laugh from the woman sitting across the table from you, “Oh? And here I thought that you could wring credits from a stone.”

“I can. But I'm not seeing any credits to be made here.”

“None? At all.”

“Perhaps if we were allowed access to the clones-”

“The longnecks would never. And even if they did, the Jedi would bar it.”

“Jedi, always ruining everything,” You scoff, as you tilt your head back to look at the white ceiling, for a moment, numbers slide across your vision, informing you of all of the open projects happening across the galaxy.

Across the table, your partner falls silent and you know that she’s seeing the same thing.

You are both high level employees of Heartwares, an intergalactic company that travels to planets in distress and helps them recover, in exchange for the planet becoming the property of Heartwaves.

It’s all above board.

After all, the company puts a lot of credits into these planets. It’s not a cheap expenditure, fixing the side effects of natural, or man-made, disasters. The planets that Heartwaves acquire are happy to have them there. Happy for the help and happy for the jobs.

Kamino is just the most recent planet to fall under the scrutiny of Heartwaves.

You drop your feet to the floor and stretch your arms over your head, “This is so boring.” You say with a sigh, “Honestly, you’d think that they’d be thrilled to have us here.”

“They are an amphibious people,” Your partner reminds as she pulls a hologame up from her comm, “Perhaps they’re happy with the status of Kamino.”

“Hm…perhaps.” You cross one leg over the other and bounce your foot, “I can’t imagine why.”

“Of course not,” She replies, “We’re both mammalian, after all.”

You stop bouncing your foot, and turn your gaze to her, “It occurs to me,” You muse thoughtfully.

“Yes?”

“We may be speaking with the wrong people.”

She pauses and lifts her cybernetic grey eyes to meet your own, “And so the gambler returns.” She presses a button on her wristband, and the room fills with a low hum, indicating that the jamming device has been activated, “Tell me.”

You lean back, your arms folding over your chest, “It occurs to me that there are more clones than Kaminoans on Kamino.”

She pauses and leans back in her seat, her own arms folding across her chest, “You suggest that we bypass the Kaminoans all together and instead negotiate with the clones.”

“I am.”

“They might say no.”

“Then we have lost nothing more than our time, and since we’re here anyway-”

She taps her lower lip with her knuckles, “Alright.” She finally says, “Go, play your hand. See what interest there is. I’ll stay here and negotiate with the Kaminoans, if they ever show up.”

“Copy that.” And then you stand and meander your way out of the room.

Surprisingly, or perhaps not so much, there’s no one to stop you from wandering through Tipoca city. And your visitor's pass opens a lot of doors. And the ones it doesn’t…well, what the longnecks don’t know won’t hurt them.

If they don’t want visitors getting into certain rooms, they should make sure that the locks can’t be hacked.

And if you insert your own personal bug into their system, so you’re able to take a peek at all of their data and learn any embarrassing secrets that they might not want you to know about-

Well, that’s a them problem, isn’t it?

You manage to wander for a lot longer than you’d manage to pull off anywhere else in the galaxy, and in fact, you’re only stopped when you find yourself in something that can only be a training room of some kind.

There’s a single man in the room, a clone, clearly, based on his armor. Though he’s so much bigger than any of the other clones that you’ve seen and spoken to.

Information slides across your vision for a moment, and you focus on it.

Ah. Alpha class clone. One of the earlier clones. Designed to be bigger and stronger. You blink the information away and focus on the man himself. He’s definitely noticed you, he’s either ignoring you or has decided that you’re not a threat.

And, really, he’s right. You’re hardly a threat.

“You aren’t meant to be in here,” He finally says.

You walk around the edges of the room, and then lean against the wall, your arms folded, “What the Kaminoans don’t know, won’t hurt them.” You reply, “Or me, for that matter.”

“I could tell them.”

You shrug, “You could. But I don’t think you will.”

He turns to face you fully, “Heh. You’re right, I won’t. Alpha-17, this is my training room.”

You flash a sly smile and introduce yourself, “I’m from Heartwaves.” You explain with a tilt of your head.

“Ah yes, the company who is slowly taking over the galaxy.”

“Well, everyone needs to make a living,” You reply with a small smile.

“The Kaminoans are never going to hand Kamino over to you.” Alpha-17 warns his arms folding across his broad chest as he watches you walk over to a weapon rack.

“Oh, probably not.” You agree easily, “That’s why my partner is waiting to talk to them, and why I’m here.”

He raises a single brow, and you take it as permission to continue.

“You see,” You say slowly as you trail a delicate finger across a training blaster, “It’s occurred to us that there are more clones than Kaminoans on Kamino. And while this planet might be hospitable for the Kaminoans themselves, it can hardly be called the same for you.”

“In case you haven’t noticed, we’re possessions. The Kaminoans own us.”

“Cloning is a tricky grey area.” You allow as your fingers drop to a blunt blade, “However, even a slave is able to ask for help from Heartwaves.” You turn to look at him, a small smile on your lips, “They just have to ask.”

“What’s your game?”

“No game. The company feels that they can make money on Kamino, and I’m starting to agree. And if the Kaminoans aren’t willing to hear us out…well, I’m not above a little underhanded tricks.”

You step away from the weapon rack and walk over to a console that allows Alpha to control the way the room looks, and you trail your fingers over the sharp edges.

“What do you get out of it?”

“Oh, I get paid no matter what you say. I have no horses in this race, so to speak.” You thoughtfully gaze at the console, “You, however, have everything to gain and nothing to lose.”

He scoffs.

“It’s true. Heartwaves doesn’t keep slaves, we’re not Czerka. You and your brothers would be free to choose what you want to do with your lives. Where you want to live. How you want to live.”

“It’ll never happen. The Republic won’t allow it.”

“I’m sure that if we throw enough money at the problem then the problem will go away.”

He releases a quiet laugh, “You’re something of a risk taker, aren’t you?”

Your smile is sharp, “I’m very good at what I do.” You pull your hand away from the console and walk over to him, “What if I can make this a better deal for you and your brothers?”

“How?”

“A cure for the increased aging,” His breath catches in his chest, and you smile, “And surgery to remove the mind-control chips from their brains.” You lightly press a single finger over your lips, “There are so many interesting little secrets in the servers…and now they belong to me.”

“Do you always cheat like this?”

“When I want to,” You grin at him, “I like stacking the deck in my favor.”

Alpha steps closer to you and then his finger is under your chin. He tilts your head up so you’re looking in his eyes. And then his hand drops so it's resting against your throat.

And you should probably be afraid, but you’ve never been afraid of a man in your life, and you’re not going to start now.

“You’re not intimidated at all.” He murmurs, something like awe in his voice.

“I’ve never let a man intimidate me before in my life,” You reply, “And I’m not going to start now.”

“I agree to the terms,” Alpha says as he walks you back to the console and presses several buttons on the screen, allowing the scenery around you to change into something that, almost, looks like a forest. “All of them, and you’ll give us the cure for the rapid aging and get those chips removed.”

You smile at him, and blink once, activating the visual computer located in your eyes and you quickly draft the contract, sending it to your datapad, and sending all of the information to your partner, before closing the interface again. And then you pull your datapad off your hip and hold it out to him, “All I need is a signature.”

He grabs the datapad and scans all of the information on the screen, before he signs the bottom, and hands it back to you.

“Pleasure doing business with you.” You purr as you slide the pad back on your hip.

Alpha hooks his finger around the collar of your shirt, and tugs you so that you’re flush against his chest, “Oh, I agree.” And then his lips are against yours, and you’re eagerly kissing him back.

It’s been far, far too long since you’ve been with another person, and he’s cute. So win-win for you.

He effortlessly lifts you and walks you so that your back is pressed against a tree, and you know it’s not a real tree, but it feels real against your back.

“I’m going to fuck you, ad’ika.” Alpha purrs as his lips latch to your neck, “But first, I want you on your knees with your pretty lips wrapped around my cock.”

You laugh breathlessly, “You have to let me down for that.”

“Was always the plan.” Slowly he lets you slide down his body, and sink to your knees in front of him. You take a moment to pull a tube of bright red lipstick out of your hip pouch, and you apply a fresh layer, pulling an approving groan from Alpha, and then you reach for his codpiece.

His hands get there before yours do, and he swiftly tugs his codpiece off and tosses it to the side.

He does allow you to tug his blacks out of the way to allow his cock, long and hard, to bounce free. He’s a little bit longer than average, and have a very nice girth that you know will feel amazing when he’s pressing into you.

“See something you like, ad’ika?” Alpha asks.

“Just thinking about how amazing this,” You grip his cock firmly and give him a stroke, “is going to feel when it’s inside me.”

“Well, you can’t have that until you do what I saw.” Alpha fists his hand in your hair, and presses the head of his cock against your lips, “Open.”

Obediently, you part your lips and teasingly dart your tongue out to lick the head of his cock.

“You’re just asking for trouble, ad’ika.” Alpha growls as he pushes his cock into your mouth, “I’m going to fuck your face, and then, if you’re good, I’ll give you what you want.”

You hum around him and he groans, “I’m going to enjoy this.”

#star wars #tcw #alpha-17 x reader #star wars fanfiction #x reader fanfiction #f!reader fic #answered asks #18+ fic #nsft

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oursystemblog · 21 hours

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is wishing you could be a system a symptom of being one? i was reading your blog yesterday and i got very very sad, and other system content will often make me sad because i relate to feeling like, in system terms, an original personality/memory holder who is too sad and traumatized to function and doesnt want to front, only its like i always have to be me no matter how much i hate me, and hate existing. so as a result i just dont function really. i relate to stuff you said about shutting down when in too much distress, like going emotionally numb, and i also dissociate a lot. but even when my mind is on something else and im acting different, its not really like switching to a different mode of awareness. i think it might be better if it was. i wish i was an alter so i could go dormant forever. im scared that its too late to completely rehaul how i conceptualize... living, thinking, being, etc... im scared i have to be me forever. im not sure this is a normal or appropriate way to feel... and im sorry for asking something so emotionally loaded too. i dont even know what im asking really... i guess just, if you have any advice, and if you ever felt this way before you realized you were a system, and how you realized. thanks if you answer. sorry

Hi, i wanted to try and write a helpful response however it ended up being Way Longer than i expected to say anything substantial so it's under the cut

I can't really give a 100% certain answer to your question—Symptoms like emotional shutdown and dissociation in response to stress/trauma are also possible without necessarily being a system, ultimately I can't say whether or not you are one (it took me a while to even say whether or not I was one haha). I personally didn't have the experience of wishing i could be a system before i figured it out, but I think I've heard from some other systems that they did experience that; I suppose it's different for everyone.

i'd try to give a more helpful response about how i realized i was a system but i actually don't remember very much about it—I guess I was always aware that I had an "other state" of myself with Very distinctly different mannerisms from my own who was pretty consistently "triggered out" by specific situations (the other state was also aware of themself like "oh, i'm in This Mode again"), and then eventually i thought "that might not be normal actually" and started researching about dissociative disorders some more

Regardless of whether or not you have alters/are an alter, I don't think going dormant would solve the problem, even though I absolutely understand the feeling. While we were still discovering our system we were in a pretty bad place, and when we discovered our own emotion-holder she was very angry and sad—which scared me initially, and i Kind of Wished that she would disappear or that I could just be A Normal Regular Singular Person. A while later I calmed down and realized it was not productive to wish things like that, so I tried talking to her and telling her that it was okay to feel angry, but that things can be better now than in the past and we are capable of healing—treating her with compassion

I think having a conversation with A Literal Part of Myself that held our anger and sadness was helpful, but I also think it's possible to do something similar even if you're not a system—to treat yourself with compassion too, I guess is what I'm getting at here.

I didn't think it would get better, but it did. I mean it took a while and there were ups and downs , but as long as you're still here it is never to late to learn to live again and to recover

Ultimately, everyone's circumstances are different and maybe what helped me doesn't apply the same way to you, but please try to remember that things can get better. Healing is possible, i wish you the best

#summarizing the multiparagraph long response the important part is that healing and getting better is possible regardless of whether you're #a system or not and also do not give up hope #ask

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zombieplaguedoc · 3 days

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This one goes out to all the self shippers who had experience with S3lf h@rm. Imagine your f/o walking in on you while you're hurting yourself. You may have made it hard to open your door, so they knock and gently say "S/i? Can i come in?" After some silence, your f/o opens the door. They would apologize if they accidentally scared you, and walk up to you slowly. You might be trying to hide the wounds or try to get away, but your f/o wants to hear the truth. They may be shocked and worried at first, but know that your f/o would never be angry at you, and they would immediately bring you into a very comforting hug. "We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." Your f/o would say in a soft voice as they keep holding you close, and even rocking you gently. "It will be okay. I am here for you." Your f/o would tell you softly, reassuring you that you're not alone and that they would always be here with your by your side until you're doing better, and even after you recover.

Your f/o loves you, and they will be here for you always, forever, and until the end of time. You are loved, appreciated, and if you are struggling, have a virtual hug from me as well. You are not alone in this, and you will always have support. <3

Antis dni, this post isn't for you.

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gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan · 1 day

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Adrift at Sea

Author’s notes: Catius’s debute in Mermay!

Summary: Catius is looking for somewhere to patch up his wounds and finds a cave. It seems empty of inhabitants. Supposedly.

Warnings: unreliable narrator, descriptions of injuries, feelings of loss and betrayal, survivor’s guilt, let me know if I need to add anything.

Tagged: @barn-anon, @bleedingichorhearts, @c-u-c-koo-4-40k, @kit-williams, @sleepyfan-blog

Tagged if it doesn't work: @kit-williams

Swimming in the oceans of this world, filled with pollution and trash, as well as a lot of life was interesting. His strong ribbon dark blue take with spots of yellow-gold mark him for being of the Ultramarine shoals. The wicked warp storm that he and his brothers had been swimming through, being shown the ways through by Captain Sicarius had been vicious, and the warp predators were even more ferocious. He feels the sting in his hearts and eyes as he remembers the First Born Second Captain abandoning him and his brothers for his own skin.

He and his brothers had been fighting together to try to break through the storm and predators. Each of his brothers falling one by one and he had assumed he'd die as well, as he continues to swim, still bleeding heavily, but alive, on this world he doesn't recognize, he may still die, or attract predators that scent the blood of a wounded creature and circle and pick at his corpse to eat his flesh. He shakes his head, no! He shouldn't think like that! He still has some of his weapons that work and his armor, while it will need to be repaired, still offers him more protection that going without it would do.

His vox is busted and his throat is healing, so trying to sing out for help is out of the question at the moment. He's blinking the spots out of his vision; he needs to find somewhere to rest and recover. He's spotted sharks, and other predatory aquatic life start to scent the blood in the water and chase after him. A few bolter blasts chase them right off, for easier prey as he silently bares his teeth in a soundless snarl at them, his scales rucking up to make him seem larger and more intimidating before he continues to swim on. Tired from battle, and his hearts sore from the loss of all the brother's he's been raised and trained with the most.

Loss and death are some of the duties of an Angel of the Imperium, and something he knows would be his fate at one point or another. But to be abandoned, before his first mission, to be torn apart and eaten by warp predators so that the first-born officers could save their own skins was... well, older brothers, especially first born are more valuable because they are older and more experienced, but an entire Company of Primaris Marines in exchange for one Captain? Even though he is the Second Captain feels a little... well, no- those thoughts are Bad Thoughts. And Not Good.

Captain Sicarius was... he likely had his reasons for leaving them behind to die. Even if he doesn't know what those reasons might be, even if they are ones that he doesn't know if he has the capacity to listen to and try to understand at the moment. He'd been warned by some that those of the gene-seed of Guilliman could have a Berserker's rage if properly pushed too far, and he'd been pushed over that limit during their abandonment, which was what likely allowed him to survive, even if he'd much rather to have died honorably alongside his battle brothers.

He takes in a couple of deep breaths and his gills flare a little as he spots an underwater cave, he slowly approaches it. He carefully scouts within the cave, making sure to keep a sight line in order to not get lost within the caverns. So far it doesn’t seem like someone is living here, whether it’s an entity or a large, or a school of smaller creatures that could potentially give him trouble as his wounds self-knit and he stops bleeding, the pain slowly fading from his body. He checks over his body and takes some rations to nibble on as he eases the complaints in his stomach into low rumbles as he tries to fall asleep.

#warhammer 40k #space marine husbandry sentience #space marine husbandry #warhammer #adeptus astartes #oc: Catius #mermay #mermay 2024 #mermay 40k

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luffysus · 3 months

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I need to talk about Cross Game - Part 1

Lately I've been feeling a bit nostalgic of the old anime/mangas I used to read, so I decided to re-read Touch by Adachi Mitsuru and that not being enough i needed to re-read Rough by the same author. And just like that I was like fuck it I just can't get enough of this author so I decided to give another one of his mangas a try and OMG I am floored. Btw I have some issued with the tropes Adachi overuses in his storytelling and his artstyle but that's for another post. Anyway, Cross Game is absolutely brilliant, this is Adachi at his best dealing with emotions, grief just like he knows. I actually haven't watched the anime adaptation so I'm just going to focus on the manga for now. I'll try to keep it short but I don't think that's even possible cause I have a LOT to say...

While looking for opinions on the series, I came across lots of reviews but mostly from anime watchers and I was often confused because a lot referred to Wakabe as Kou's girlfriend and I was just sat there like huh ??? Did i missread something in the manga that the anime captured lol ? I mean Kou did love Wakabe but the author from the very beginning of the manga went out of his way to show us their relationship was a bit one-sided. Wakabe loved Kou (mind you they were just like 10 year olds at this point in the story so i feel a bit weird calling it "love" lol) but Kou on the other hand was always more interested in her sister Aoba.

The instances are subtle a la Adachi but there are almost in every chapter. It's the way he sets up his panels, the dialogue or silences that sometimes can be so mundane but highlight obvious human emotions, like longing.

Starting from Chapter 1, Kou and Aoba are the first two characters we are introduced to and already in that introduction we have Kou staring at /taking interest in whatever it is Aoba is doing.

And mind you right before this, is a page of Kou staring at bathing suits, and when his father scolds him he basically replies he is a maturing boy so staring at things regarding the opposite sex is normal...almost like the author is outright showing us the what interests this hormonal pre-teen...

The first part of the story being focused on Wakabe and Kou's relationship actually highlights and cements the fact that Kou always liked Aoba differently. It's in the way he wasn't really intereted in keeping that tradition Wakabe wanted of them buying each other gifts every year.

It's the way he would almost always mention Aoba while with Wakabe (I started taking screenshots of the different instances but there were actually like so many I gave up lol I can't post all of them). I will however just touch upon imo the biggest giveaway depicted. It is when they are exchanging birthday gifts and Wakabe spots a newlywed couple. She's obviously emotional and she mentions how the couple will definetely be happy since they got married on a special day (her and Kou's birthday). When I tell you Adachi has a way of setting up his panels...because what comes next is kind of a brutal hint that only Wakabe was in "love". As she is mesmerised by the bride and imagines herself in that position...one day most likely with him... Kou is not listening and is basically thinking about Aoba and trying to emulate her pitching. You can't make this up...

Now this could absolutely be my head canon, but Wakabe being the very perceptive young girl she was, imo figured out Kou liked Aoba that's why she tells Aoba not to take him away from her when he grows up to be the kind of man she knows Aoba will like (aka a pretty damn good baseball player).

When Wakabe tragically dies at that young age, Aoba could never forget that request from her late sister. That's what makes Aoba's struggling to come to terms with her feelings for Kou as they grow up so poignant. Not only does she have to come deal with the grief of losing the sister she was closest to, she also has to fight her growing attraction for Kou so she literally forces herself to exgerrate feelings of hatred him because falling for him meant betraying the late sister she loved so much.

Kou too has some internal conflicts he has to deal with before accepting that he loves Aoba. While he was not romantically interested in Wakabe, he still loved her very much. She was the only constant in his life, always pushing him to become a better person. It's a love that's in a way so much deeper than romantic love. It's the kind of love you feel for a twin (and knowing Adachi this is exactly what he was going with, by setting their birthday the same day and place). Plus like I said because their relationship was bit one side he felt that much more guilt, that she was the one always loving him, always doting on him during their time together. On top of that his feelings for sisters just kept growing...

This is what makes Cross Game so damn heartfelt. The emotions the characters go through are so complex, so human it tugs at your heart. Seeing these two heartbroken people try to cope with the death of loved one while coming into adulthood and dealing with their survivor's guilt, growing emotions... Damn.

I titled this part 1 because I still have so much more to say lmao. I'll stop here for now. Well done to anyone who manages to read all this and if you did I hope this makes you want to watch/read Cross Game.

#cross game #Kou Kitamura #aoba tsukishima #adachi mitsuru #I might not recover from this for a while #sorry to my OP followers for this random post lol

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