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#I love looking back at my fics from 2012 on and being like WOW look how much I have grown!!!!!!
thebest-medicine · 2 months
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So someone sent me an anon ask saying something like “well you’re terrible at writing so maybe you should stop and get a new hobby” I don’t want to bother publishing the ask (already blocked and deleted oop) to give attention to it but one thing about it kind of stuck with me. My question for people with this thought process…. do you…..do you think you have to be “good” at something for you to be ‘allowed’ to have it as a hobby? My dudes..hobbies are about doing things you enjoy… for you and you alone…. it has nothing to do with being arbitrarily ‘good’ or not friend.
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To anyone worried about not writing / drawing / whatever else because you aren’t good at it, you don’t have to be! life is about creation and fun and finding joy in the things you do and where you are
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discokicks · 10 months
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FOX IN THE BOX — ROY KENT.
PART TWO of ACES AT THE WATER’S EDGE.
(series masterlist!) (AO3!) (series playlist!)
pairing: roy kent x fem!reader (no use of y/n!)
summary: back in 2012, you and roy meet for the first time. in 2023, you sign a one-year contract with richmond and have to work with roy for the first time. both go about as well as you’d expect.
word count & rating: 9.6k, R (roy kent says fuck and does fuck!)
chapter warnings: swearing, light sexual innuendos and light references to sex, mentions of alcohol and partying (the olympians get DOWN in olympic village) minor allusions to what happened to reader at west ham, major football talk, roy kent is rich, original character intros and plot (author really likes a plot, woo boy), angst, and of course, fluff.
author’s note: ok wow, thank you for all the love on the first chapter! wildly unexpected but much appreciated. this one’s got a bit more to it— jumping timelines, original characters, lotta soccer/football talk, reader and roy don’t know how to act (in more ways than one). also did crazy research into the 2012 olympics for this, so no one tell me my timeline’s off or i’ll cry. also also, is roy's sister named molly or is that just evidence that i've read too many fics? whatever it is, her name's molly! thank you again for the love and i hope you all enjoy! love you all tons! -mags
LONDON OLYMPICS. (LATE JULY, 2012)
You meet Roy Kent for the first time at midnight, in a rookie’s dorm room in the Olympic Village.
It’s a seemingly unlikely place for a football phenom like him to be. You’d expected all of those guys to choose to be elsewhere, exploiting their home-country advantage to hang out in their posh flats. But there they were, carrying out their team bonding efforts to prepare for their game tomorrow. 
Knowing what you know about Roy now, it’s fitting for him to have been there. But in this moment, you’re shocked to see the likes of him in Olympic Village. 
It’s a place that’s convinced you that your college career was only good for preparing you for it. And you’re not even talking about the sports aspect of it. You’re talking about the shit-show, chaos-menu of athletes from around the world, acting as though it’s the first week of freshman year.
Despite the fact that alcohol, drugs, and any other traditional party favors are completely off-limits on-premises, it doesn’t seem to deter your fellow Olympians from running the dorms like it’s a frat party. You’re half-convinced you’re going to get a classic ‘who do you know here’ from the trust-fund-looking Australian swimmer you pass getting into your building, but he just sends a heartbreaking smile at you and your teammate as you walk in.
Your team’s fresh off the bus from Glasgow, having just beat France at Hampden Park. It was a hell of a way to open, despite the Opening Ceremony not taking place for another two days. As a younger player who’d proven herself in last year’s World Cup, you were the starting striker in your first Olympic game ever, scoring the second goal of the match and assisting the fourth. The adrenaline of it all hadn’t quite worn off yet. 
It’s clear that your teammate’s feeling the same way. Melanie Rivera, your left winger and for all intents and purposes, best friend, is straight-up vibrating. You’d met during World Cup training, where you two had instantly clicked and she’d taken you under her wing to show you the ropes and what it meant to play at this level. Despite this being her second Olympics, the feeling of a win never goes away. Or at least, that’s what she tells you.
The two of you are practically bouncing off the walls as you arrive on your floor, giggling to yourselves about different things that had happened during the game. Your fluent-in-French full-back telling off a French forward when she got too close to your goalie. The mid-game mishap where some French girl’s cleat went flying. The ‘bullshit’ yellow card Mel had received right before the half (Mel knew it was a fair call, she’d totally pushed that girl). 
“She was asking for it, though,” Mel insists, collapsing onto your bed as you enter your shared room. “Pulling on my shirt the whole game. I have two rules. Two. Don’t—”
You roll your eyes, having heard these rules a million times. “—touch my goalie, and don’t—”
“—touch my fucking kit,” she finishes, throwing her hands up exasperatedly. Her eyes shut with a huff.  “They’re pretty simple. Don’t know why people can’t follow them.”
“Yeah, it’s a travesty,” you reply dryly. Your lip curls into a grimace as you look at her. “You wanna know what my rules are?”
One of Mel’s eyes opens with a knowing smile. “Don’t be sweaty on your bed?”
“Oh, so we do remember,” you say, falsely cheery. The faux smile falls from your face. “Get off. Or at least shower. I want to go to bed and I don’t want to like, smell you.”
Mel rolls off your bed with a dramatic sigh. “Fine,” she relents. “But you can’t go to bed.”
Your expression remains unamused. “And why not?”
“Because the British men’s team is hanging out upstairs,” she states as if the answer’s obvious.
“Right. Of course,” you reply. “So, we’re crashing their team bonding?”
“No,” she says, pointing at you. “Their women’s team crashed. And then Jack texted me to tell us to come up.”
You narrow your eyes at her. “Uh-huh. Is Paige there?”
Mel shrugs, avoiding your gaze. “Maybe.”
“Oh, great,” you say sarcastically. “So, you’re forcing me to stay awake so I can wingman you?”
Mel flops on your bed once more. “Please,” she cries. “Dude, I like her so fucking much. We’ve been texting since the Cup and I don’t know, this year I think I’ve got a chance.”
“Why can’t Jack wingman you? He’s clearly down to set you two up,” you say, sounding a bit whiny. “Also, why are they hanging out here? I thought they’d rent a place or stay at their own houses.”
“They make the rookies stay in the Village their first years. It's for the experience, or whatever,” she answers. That’s brushed to the side quickly. “Also, Jack is a fucking awful wingman. The only type of scoring he’s good at is on the field.” She looks at you expectantly. “And I can’t go up there alone. I’ll look like a loser.”
You gape at her. “You are twenty-seven years old.”
“And I’ll look like a twenty-seven-year-old friendless loser!” When she sees the expression you’re wearing, she tilts on her side. “Say yes or I’ll roll around in your bed.”
You cover your face with your hands, an exhausted laugh echoing into your palms. This clearly is a losing battle, and you decide you’re going to be a good friend tonight. “Fine,” you groan, hearing your bed squeak as she launches herself off of it with a cheer. “An hour. That’s it. And then I’m going to bed and never talking to you again.”
“I can live with that,” she yells, bounding for the shower in your room. “I’ll text Jack that we’ll be up in thirty!”
“You owe me so big!” you reply.
You can hear Mel’s grin when she says, “I love you, too!”
Thirty minutes later, you’re freshly showered and up three floors, standing outside of the rookie’s dorm room. You can hear just how loud it is from outside and you suddenly really feel like you’re back in college again. 
It takes Mel a solid three minutes to work up the courage to knock on the door, something that you’re sure would have taken longer if you hadn’t reached out and done it yourself. She scowls at you, but the door opens before she can cuss you out.
Jack Wilson, Tottingham sweeper and three-time Olympian, answers the door with a wide smile. You’d met him a handful of times due to his friendship with Mel and he was just as lovely as everyone had said. There was a charming sort of awkwardness about him despite his status as a professional footballer, but it made him all the more endearing to you. 
“Glad you finally decided to show,” he said to you two, opening the door wider for you to enter. “Congrats on the win.”
“Thanks,” Mel said, eyes already scanning the small dorm living room for Paige. “What’s up with the team bonding in the dorms?”
You’re also looking around the room, sending smiles to the handful of girls you recognize. “Game tomorrow. Coach wanted us to do dinner as a team, so we ate in that big hall. And we--” he says, pointing to two guys on the couch, “--wanted to see the Village this year. So here we are.”
Your eyes follow his finger to the men, one of which isn’t familiar. The other, you immediately identify as Roy Kent. And his eyes are on you.
He’s easily recognizable, curly hair a bit more tame and managed than the iconic, half-assed mullet he’d had when he first signed with Chelsea. That ever-present scowl only lifts a little when he sees that you and Mel have arrived, but you honestly can’t see much change in his expression due to his drawn brows.
While you’d relied on Mel for the majority of your connections to this new world of football, she’d never really seemed to hang out with the likes of Roy. From what you’d gathered, despite his rather high status, he was a bit of a recluse. Yes, he went out constantly, and yes (if the tabloids were right), he’d certainly dated around, nobody really seemed to know much about him. 
When he’d come up in a team game of ‘Fuck, Marry, Kill’ with famous footballers, Mel had told the group that he was a guy of few words, and of the words he did say, ‘fuck’ seemed to be his favorite. Your friend and teammate Katie O’Connor was ready with a terrible impression of him when she answered with ‘fuck,’ especially after Mel also confirmed that the Gina Gershon news was true. 
You try to ignore this as you go over to introduce yourself to them, despite the fact it’s currently setting up camp in your brain. “Nice to meet you guys,” you say to Roy and the other boy on the couch. Jack takes a spot next to you on the floor as you take an empty chair next to the couch. Paige waves at you from her spot when you sit.
Roy nods at you in acknowledgment. “Good showing out there.”
Jack points at you. “Bloody insane goal you had,” he says. “I think I’d break my back if I tried to do a scorpion kick like that. It was fucking class.”
You grin. “Well, lucky for Tottenham, they keep you on the other side,” you say, then quietly add, “Not that it would make a difference.”
You see Roy’s lips twitch up from the corner of your eye, and you bite back a laugh as Jack physically deflates before you. Mel’s heard your comment and runs over to sit on the arm of your chair, which is conveniently close to Paige. “Ooh, is it shit on Tottenham time? Because I haven’t seen your ass in months, so I got a whole list, man.”
As the two of them begin to argue in the way they do, you sit at watch them with a smile. They’d had this type of relationship since you’d met them back at the Cup, when Jack had flown into Germany to see your final games. Despite the loss, those were a wild couple of weeks.
The moment your brain starts to recount them, you can feel a pair of eyes on you. It snaps you out of your haze completely. Especially when you realize that it’s Roy Kent who’s staring at you once more.
You blink at him, slightly confused by the attention. “Hi?”
He nods at you again. He seems to take a moment to evaluate you, and then, “You overthink.”
“W-What?” you ask. The word comes out clunky and confused.
Roy motions to the TV that’s on across the room, one that’s showing highlights from your game. “Out there,” he says. “You overthink.”
The two of you stare at each other for a moment. You, feeling unbelievably out of sorts and unsure of what brought this on, Roy, secure and casual, like he just stated the weather. 
Before you can question him, he nods at you for a final time, then stands up. “I’m going home,” he tells the group. “You lot better be fucking ready for the game tomorrow.”
Roy’s out of the room before anyone can say a proper goodbye to him, but no one bats an eye. No questions follow. 
Except you, of course. You’ve got a fucking million.
You overthink on the field? Where the fuck had he gotten that from? How had he seen it? While there were some times, yeah, you got a bit in your head, you’d never considered yourself an overthinker. And even if you were, the overthinking produced results, right? You liked to think you were just three steps ahead of everyone else out there. Not an overthinker.
But what made him say that? What had he seen? Was it your hesitation outside the box in the first fifteen that resulted in you losing the ball? Was it the switch you’d made to get to the goal when your right winger had it on the side? Was there a look on your face when you’d taken that free kick in the second half? You were pretty in your head then, but hey, it led to Mel scoring.
Overthinking. Pfft. He didn’t know what he was talking about. 
But then again, what the fuck was he talking about?
The thought of this unknown bomb dropped on you without any sort of answers quickly and completely took over your mind. Criticism about your playing had never bothered you (you were a twenty-five-year-old female soccer player, and you’d had more horrendous coaches than you could count), but this? This was something that literally made you itch. And you weren’t going to be able to scratch it until you knew what the hell he meant.
Before you knew what you were doing, you found yourself practically chasing Roy out of the room, whipping your head around to figure out which way he’d gone. Lucky for you, the dorm’s slow lifts were on your side. 
Roy stood by the elevator, checking something on his phone as he waited. He clearly doesn’t hear you coming because he nearly drops it when you ask, “What do you mean I overthink?”
“What the fuck?” And now he’s staring at you like you’re the crazy one.
“I should be asking you that!” you say, then motion back to the direction of the dorm. “You tell me I overthink, stare at me with no follow-up, then leave? Who does that?” You’re way too animated for past midnight, but you don’t care. “Because even if I was an overthinker, which I’m not, that sort of stuff is probably the worst thing you can do. Not leaving on a note like that is like, rule number one.”
Roy’s brows shoot up. “I wasn’t aware there were rules.”
“Yeah, well, there are,” you reply, crossing your arms over your chest. When he continues to just stare at you, you make a face that you hope will cue him to go on. “So, go ahead. Please explain yourself.”
“Explain the overthinking thing?” he asks. “I thought it was pretty fucking simple.”
You roll your eyes. “No, what made you say that? Was it a play I had? Was it something I did? What did you see? I’m just curious as to—”
“You came up the field toward the end of the game,” he says, effectively cutting you off. “And you made a pass to Rivera that led to another pass, then a goal.”
You nod at him, not seeing his point at all. “Yeah? So? It was a great goal by Katie.”
Roy’s expression turns slightly frustrated, as if he’s annoyed that you don’t immediately catch on. “It was a great goal. But the fucking second you saw Rivera next to you, you started thinking ahead,” he tells you. “So far ahead that you didn’t notice how slow and fucking awful your mark was and that you could have had a better goal if you’d stopped thinking.”
There are approximately fifteen seconds of dead air between you two as you attempt to take in what he just said to you. “So, let me get this straight,” you begin. “You’re saying I’m bad because I think too much about teamwork?”
For a moment, you think Roy’s going to slam his head into the elevator door. Instead, he just turns to the buttons and presses them once more. “Fuck’s sake, could these be any fucking slower?”
You’re too far gone at this point to even be offended. “Uh, it doesn’t matter. You started this. You’re not going anywhere until we finish it. Why does me not being a selfish dick make me bad?”
“I didn’t say you were bad. You’re not. Clearly,” he responds. You note a bit of the classic ‘Roy Kent’ anger laced within his words and it makes you snap your mouth shut. “I’m just saying. You’re at your best when you’re not so fucking nice and when you don’t fucking think.”
Unconsciously, your arms cross over your chest. “I’ve got twenty-two years of playing time and about ten coaches that would disagree with that.” 
Once more, you see the corner of his mouth slide upward as he glances at you. “If that’s the case, then your coaches were all idiots. They weren’t smart enough to let you loose.”
An unexpected warmth rises to your cheeks. But instead of acknowledging it, you ask, “What, like you’d be a better one?” Before he can respond to that, you’re talking again. “And even if all of that were true, I wouldn’t know how to do that.”
Roy’s brow creases. “Do what?”
“Not… think ahead,” you say. “Or not think at all. That being three steps ahead thing is kind of, well, my thing.” You offer a shrug. “The generous, teamwork thing too. I like that. It’s what makes me good.”
Roy continues to look at you, but says nothing. For a moment, all is quiet as he just… stares, almost as if he can see through you. Like he’s privy to something you’re not, or he’s had some sort of revelation about you. You’re not sure anyone’s ever looked at your this hard. It’s a bit unnerving and you have to fight to not avert your eyes.
Before you can begin to further overthink that (god fucking damn it), he’s holding his phone out to you. You stare down at it blankly. 
“You’re showing me your phone,” you state, but it’s almost a question.
Roy rolls his eyes. “Put in your fucking number,” he says.
Your lips purse as you hesitate, but you find yourself reaching out for it. “Is this how you typically do it?” you ask, typing your name into his contacts. “You neg a girl for five minutes straight and then ask her for her number?”
Roy rolls his eyes again, but there’s humor amongst the annoyance this time. “I’m going to text you a time and an address,” he tells you. You hand him his phone back. “Be there on Friday after the Opening Ceremony.”
The elevator had finally arrived in the middle of his sentence and you eye him wearily as he steps in. “Just… show up to this address?” you ask. “Do I get context? Like, what to expect? What am I dressing for?”
“Overthinking,” he reminds you as he presses the button for the lobby. “Just fucking be there.”
Before you can object further or tell him that you were not in fact overthinking, you were just a woman in a foreign city concerned for your safety, he leans forward to stop the doors from closing. He’s got one hand up and has a small smirk on his face.
“And just so we’re crystal fucking clear,” he says. “If I were trying to chat you up, you’d fucking know it.”
Your eyes immediately fix into a glare and the doors close before you can say anything in response. “Asshole,” you mutter to yourself, but you’re already flipping your phone over to see if he’s texted you.
(You won’t know this until much, much later, but Roy Kent let out a loud and regretful ‘fuck!’ as soon as he was five floors down, absolutely cringing at the idea that he used a line like that on someone like you. It plagued him for three years straight.)
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PRESENT DAY. (EARLY AUGUST, 2023)
On a day when Roy not only had the strangest interaction of his life with Jamie Tartt in the Boot Room, but he also found out that Trent fucking Crimm would be lingering around all season, he was sure that he was done with surprises at Nelson Road.
That quickly proved to be false, as he soon found that Ted was rounding the team up in the media room for some sort of meeting.
Roy saw Beard as he was leaving the Coaches’ Office and sent a questioning look his way. “Did I miss film on the agenda?”
Beard shook his head. “Nope. Impromptu. We just heard back.”
“Heard back?” Roy asked, watching Beard go to leave the room. “The fuck are you on about?”
Beard smiled at him in the doorway. “We got her,” he said and left with a skip in his step that Roy wasn’t sure he’d ever seen before.
They’d gotten her? Got who? 
Then it hit Roy. Oh. You. They’d gotten you.
You’d said yes. You were joining Richmond. He’d helped convince you. Despite everything, despite all that had happened and everything you two had done, you’d said yes. You were willing to work with him. You were now going to be back in his life for worse or for better. And not just back in his life, but a fucking constant in it.
Then that hit Roy. The reality of it all fucking bodyslams him and it makes his heart race. After eight years of cold-turkey no-contact, he was going to be seeing you every day. After everything he’d done. After everything you had done.
Roy realized then that he didn’t exactly consider this feeling. That he was so blindsided by Rebecca’s request and by seeing you that he didn’t even think about this. It had been hard enough to work up the nerve to confront and speak to you once. Would it feel like that all season? Had you considered this?
But then, he remembered you and how you think about every fucking angle of every situation. You definitely had thought about this. And if you were willing to push the discomfort, the awkwardness, the whatever in order to have this job, he supposed he had to be too.
Roy swore under his breath, turning away from his desk to get his head back on straight. The team was waiting for him. He could mope about this in the comfort of his own home later.
He arrived in the room just as the rest of the team was getting in. The boys were buzzing. Between the news of a potential Zava acquisition and the Trent Crimm book development, as well as whatever this was, they couldn’t seem to stop talking. Roy didn’t blame them. It was a lot for one day. 
(It’d been a lot for him too. With everyone now knowing about his break-up with Keeley, to fucking Trent Crimm, to you, he was surprised he hadn’t gone outside to scream yet. But he presumed that was coming.)
“Alright fellas, listen up,” Ted said from the front of the room, holding his hand up to get everyone’s attention. The team quieted down after a moment. “I know there’s been a lot of talk going around this week. And I know y’all are excited. But I’ve got some more news.”
“I don’t know if I can take any more,” Dani said, sending a wave of agreement through the group. “It’s hurting my head.”
Ted chuckled. “I know. Mine too. And we’re the ones who have to manage all this,” he said, motioning to Beard and Roy who stood against the wall. “But this is good news.”
Good news? That was something the team could manage.
“So, how many of you are familiar with the Women’s World Cup that happened back in 2015?” he asked, eyes scanning the crowd.
A murmur went through the team. “America won?” Colin offered. “Crazy final game that was.”
Isaac pointed at Roy. “You did some shit for Sky Sports for this Cup, right?”
As the boys began to recall this, Jaan Mas said, “Why they gave you another pundit job after that completely blows my mind.”
“Yes, Roy did do some TV work over here,” Ted answered after the laughter died down. “And yes, America won. But does anyone remember what this Cup started to be called?”
It seemed as though no one had an answer. That is, until Beard cleared his throat said, “The Summer of Fourteen, baby!”
Ted snapped at his best friend. “That’s exactly right, Coach. And despite it being the 2015 Cup, they called it that because of this woman right here.”
Ted had brought up what is perhaps the most iconic photo of you to date. It’s one of the first things to come up if you were to Google yourself, a picture that’s haunted you for the last eight years. It’s from the 2015 quarter-final. You’re mid-penalty kick against China, scowl on your face as your foot collides with the ball, blood dripping down your face from the broken nose you’d received moments before. 
(It’s certainly not the most elegant or flattering picture of you that exists, especially when your fellow teammates’ search results yielded photos of them at the ESPYs, but you still think you’ve never looked like more of a badass.)
Ted said your name smoothly as he pointed to you on the screen, annunciating all syllables. “Wildly prolific USA Women's athlete despite her rather short time in the league. And while she was always good, y’know, starting striker since she began and all that—” He chuckled, turning to look at his other coaches, who had knowing smiles on their faces. “—I don’t know. There was something in the water in 2015. Because she just became…”
Ted trailed off, looking for the word. This time, Roy found it before Beard. “A nightmare,” he said, with a suppressed yet fond sort of smile. “She was a fucking nightmare out there.”
“In a good way, of course,” Ted cleared up, earning a nod from Roy. “But, yeah. A nightmare. Wonderful teammate and fantastic playmaker, but man…” Ted trailed off with a low whistle. “We were all glad she played for our neck of the woods.”
Jamie’s hand went up. “Didn’t she just get like, hired and fired by West Ham?”
“Wonderful segue there, Jamie,” Ted said. “Because yes, that is true. She was with West Ham for a couple months. First female coach in the league. Pretty impressive stuff, and it was a pretty big deal. And then something went wrong, and they let her go.” The team made a noise of acknowledgment, all of them having seen it in the news. “And I don’t know what happened, and we probably won’t know what happened, but we knew she was too good to leave the league. Lucky for us, we need a new coach. And she needs a new job.”
There was a wide smile on his face when Sam asked, “So she will be joining Richmond?” 
“That she is, Sam,” Ted replied, earning yet another eruption of chatter amongst the group. “She’ll be joining us on Monday. And while I know you fellas will do everything you can to make her feel welcome and will show her the same level of respect that you show us up here—” Ted pointed to his coaches once more, glancing down at the computer in front of him. “—I’m going to show you why she deserves it more than us.”
A YouTube video of your highlights appeared on the big screen, going full-screen as the quick ad ended. Ted stepped back from the computer, sitting down on the stool behind him to watch along with the rest. 
Your famous 2012-France-Scorpion-Kick goal just so happens to be the first thing up and Roy’s heart nearly stops. It’d been years since he’d seen this clip and he was immediately transported back to the night you two met. A ghost of a smile unconsciously made its way up his face as he watched your body contort to flip around, and the ball soar into the net. It was a goal of pure and utter instinct. You hadn’t thought about it. You just ran in there like a maniac and knew what to do. That one gets an immediate reaction from the team.
The next one is a play you’d set up in the Quarter-Final New Zealand game, with a bunch of quick passing in the box to confuse and rattle the defense. Melanie Rivera had sent you a world-class assist for an even better goal, one that earns you the title of ‘Fox in the Box’ from the past commentator on screen. The next, an impressive goal scored after an injury you’d had in the Semi-Finals against Canada. Then, and perhaps most famously, your assist to Katie O’Connor from midfield to win the Gold. 
And they hadn’t even gotten to the World Cup yet.
The World Cup footage made up the other three-fourths of the video. It was a completely different side of you, one that had thrown caution to the wind, one that had a huge fucking chip on her shoulder, one that was just… insane. In all the best ways and meanings.
Roy’s shock of the day, though, comes after a highlight of you completely blowing past three Colombian defenders. You’d broken the fourth’s ankles with your footwork in the box for a quick goal. Footwork of yours that had been massively improved, Roy noted. And he would know, he’s the one who did it.
Arlo White’s voice filled up the room. “And yet another breakaway goal from USA’s Mean Fourteen!” The clip said. “It’s just remarkable to watch her work this year, don’t you think, Roy?”
Roy felt all eyes on him when he heard his own voice on the speakers. “I don’t know what USA would do without her,” 2015 Roy Kent said. “I’d hate to have her against me.”
It was strange for Roy to hear his own voice mock him like that. And as the team began to cheer for him, he felt a pit form in his stomach. They didn’t even know.
The highlight reel continued for another couple of minutes, and it seemed with each play, the boys became more excited about the prospect of being coached by someone like you. Beard and Ted were evidently just as ecstatic about the development, and Roy knew he had to get on board. Warp his feelings and nerves and whatever else into something resembling his team’s attitude.
After all, he was the reason you were joining.
The lights came up as soon as the video ended, snapping Roy back to reality. Ted smiled at the team. “Alright, fellas. Now, let’s get to work on the welcome party.”
The boys hooped and hollered, each of them getting up to join in whatever Ted had planned. Beard looked over at Roy as the rest filed out. 
“You think we’re ready for her?” he asked.
Roy hated the weird fucking sixth sense Beard had when it came to… well, everything. He made Roy feel like he was completely transparent. “We’re ready for her,” he replied.
Though, he wasn’t sure if he was assuring Beard or himself.
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PRESENT DAY. (EARLY AUGUST, 2023.)
You sign a one-year coaching contract with AFC Richmond that Monday in Rebecca Walton’s office.
The news broke that you’d been picked up by Richmond on Friday, something that had completely come alive in the press world. Your face was plastered over all of the papers yet again, newscasters seemed to mention your name every time you turned on your TV, and social media was set on fire. Everyone had something to say about this move and the majority of it wasn’t too positive.
You tried to keep your nose out of it, knowing just how much you did not need to see people talking about you like that. The majority of the negativity was from West Ham fans, wishing Richmond ‘luck’ with the likes of you, others wishing you good riddance. 
If they knew how happy you were to be out of there, you’re not so sure they’d be as excited to let you go.
Though signings on every level in this league were typically more public affairs, ones with major press conferences and coverage, you’d requested this to be quieter. Just a few statements from the people who mattered and a pen and paper. You’d been in the media a bit too much for your liking over these past couple of months, and if you could get some exclusivity, you’d take it. 
Rebecca, thankfully, was more than happy to comply. You’d been in contact with her practically non-stop since you’d called her, and she’d been nothing but lovely to you. Each interaction with her made you feel better about this job, despite the cloud of anxiety that still hung over you.
You’re sitting in a chair opposite Rebecca’s desk when a message from Mel comes through. i always liked richmond better than west ham anyway, she says. paige and i bought shirts and will be at every game. 
A photo comes through shortly after of her three-year-old toddler, decked out in a Jamie Tartt jersey. oliver’s already got his!
You can’t help the smile that spreads across your face, fingers tapping against your screen with a quick response. adorable. give him and paige a hug for me. and i’ll be freaking out so bad at every game that i’m gonna need you there anyway, so i’m holding you to that.
you’ll be incredible. knock ‘em dead, kid.
Rebecca re-enters her office before you can respond with a thank you. She’s got Coach Ted Lasso in tow, who could not be grinning brighter at you. The second you see him, you think about everything Nate had told you during your short time at West Ham, and something within you just can’t believe it. The energy of Richmond had been different as soon as you walked through the door. The good kind of different. And their manager appeared to not be an exception.
Ted greets you immediately with an outstretched hand. “It’s so nice to finally meet you,” he says after your introduction. “I gotta tell you, we’re all mighty excited that you’re here.”
“I think I might be more excited,” you reply, and it’s an honest answer. Or at least, you’d been able to shift your nerves about the job into excitement. You’d only anxiety-thrown up once today. You figured that was an accomplishment. “Seriously. Thank you both again for the opportunity.”
“We’re just grateful you said yes,” Rebecca says. You can tell she means it. “The team’s been buzzing all week.”
The nerves return at the mention of the team, but you mentally scream at yourself to get over it. “Well, I’m just excited to get started.”
“Speaking of getting started, we should probably head downstairs,” Ted says to Rebecca. “I wanna show our new coach around a bit before practice gets going.”
“Of course, don’t let me keep you,” Rebecca responds. “I’ve got a couple more things for you to sign before you leave today, so just make sure to stop by. If you have any questions, my door’s always open, or you can ask Leslie, who you met earlier, who’s always wandering around somewhere.” Her smile gets warmer as she puts a hand on your shoulder. “And we really are pleased to have you joining us.”
You wonder for a moment how a woman like her could have ever been married to an asshole like Rupert, but you suppose that’s a story for another day. “Thank you,” you say again, a bit of that anxiety washing away. “I’m happy to be here.”
Ted leads you out of the office, his tour starting from the minute you exit. He offers a bit of insight into himself and his time at Richmond, his past two years working with Rebecca, then launches into what he knows about the history of the place (and you don’t have the heart to tell him that Rebecca had already done that when you’d arrived). 
The facility is gorgeous, but it feels a bit more lived-in and welcoming than what you remember about West Ham. Everything there was so manicured and monochromatic and sterile. Nothing about it felt like a place you’d want to work.
Richmond is the opposite. It’s bright and colorful and you can hear people laughing as soon as you step down into the lower level. While your nervousness about the team still lingers, you can feel it easing. You’ll see how long that lasts.
You’re stepping into the Coaches’ Office before you even realize it, mind too occupied with taking in your new surroundings and trying to keep up with Ted’s story. You resent the overwhelming amount of relief you feel when you realize there are only two men in the office, and neither of them are Roy. 
One is sitting with his feet crossed up on his desk and a book in his face. The other is writing on a notepad at a separate desk. You’re surprised by the speed at which both of them jump up to greet you as you and Ted enter.
“Alright, Coach, this is Coach Beard,” Ted says, and you meet Beard’s hand for a shake. “He’s one of the guys you’ll be working with this season.”
“Nice to meet you,” Beard says, nodding your way.
“You too,” you reply. Your eyes are drawn to the book he placed down on his desk and you allow yourself to grin. “I love Merlin Sheldrake.” When his brows shoot up in surprise, you shrug. “I’ve got a lot of time in the off-season.”
Beard’s eyes light up. “We’ll get along just fine.”
Your grin grows and you hear Ted’s voice from behind you. “Is that that mushroom book?” he asks. “I don’t think Beard’s ever found someone who reads that stuff too. I guess we’ve now got two Fun-guys in the group.”
You glance over at Beard. “Now it's a Fung-us.”
Out of the corner of your eye, you see Ted’s hand come up to his mouth as he looks over at his best friend. For whatever reason, it’s clear that the two of them are trying to contain their excitement. Before you can question it, Ted places a hand on your shoulder. “Oh, you’ll fit right in here, Ace.”
The nickname catches you off guard. It’s something that you haven’t heard since your playing days, something that the commentators and pundits loved to call you. It was always a compliment when they said it, but something about the way that your new manager says it makes it sound more like a title than a name. Like that’s what you are. 
It immediately makes you feel welcome and you can feel yourself warm into their excitement.
The other man in the room, who’s been watching this interaction in amusement, steps forward to hold out his hand to you as well. “Trent Crimm.”
Now, it’s your turn to raise your brows. “You’re the writer who keeps calling me?”
A smile that could also be a cringe appears on his face. “Guilty,” he answers. “Just trying to cover all the bases for the book.”
“I get it,” you tell him. “If you still want a quote, I’d be happy to give you one. But I can’t guarantee it’s going to be clean.”
Trent chuckles. “I’ll take what I can get at this point.”
There’s a moment where you almost question what he means by that, but you brush it off. Especially now that Ted’s started talking again. “Roy's running a little late, but I’ve heard y’all already know each other, so we’re not technically missing an introduction.”
That makes you pause. You’d figured that when Roy had appeared on your doorstep he’d told at least Rebecca about your past, and that the probability he’d told the staff was high too. But exactly how much had he told them? Did they know the basics or did they know everything?
You then realize it’s Roy you’re talking about. There was no way in hell he’d told them anything more than what Ted said. That you knew each other. Maybe that things hadn’t ended smoothly. But that was it.
That, at least, gives you a bit more confidence. Ted turns to you and leads you back into the small, adjoining room you’d walked through, pointing at an almost empty desk. “That’s yours,” he tells you. “Feel free to dress it up with whatever you want, and get yourself unpacked. We’re starting practice in about fifteen minutes and Coach Beard and I gotta set some things up, but I’d like to introduce you to the fellas before you start shadowing. That all sound good?”
You grip the strap of your backpack and nod at him with a smile. “Works for me, Coach.”
Ted grins, patting you on the arm. “Glad to hear it.”
And with that, he returns to his desk, making sure to leave the door open as he leaves.
You plop your backpack on your desk and begin to empty out your things. You grab your laptop first and place it on your desk, followed by a couple of knick-knacks and photos you brought along, ones that never felt at home at your desk at West Ham. There’s a rational piece of you that knows you should stop comparing the two places, but the pettier, more aggressive side of you tells it to fuck off.
(You like to listen to that one when you can these days.)
You’re holding a photo of a baby Oliver dressed in a Women’s USA onesie when you hear someone else walk into the room. You glance over your shoulder and immediately regret it.
Roy Kent is standing in the doorway, staring at you like he completely forgot your signing day was today.
Of course, Roy hadn’t. He’d been pacing around his flat all morning because of it. It was actually why he was late to work. But he hadn’t expected to see you as soon as he walked in. In his office. Now, your office too, he supposed.
The two of you just stared at each other for a moment, much like you did when you saw each other again for the first time last week. However, it appears that you’re both acutely aware of the three sets of eyes that are on you two from the other room.
Like you’re snapping into a scene in a play, Roy’s expression rids itself of all surprise. “Coach,” he says stiffly, nodding at you.
Coach. You suddenly remember your previous conversation. It’ll be professional. Civil. I won’t let there be any issues. 
Well, if he won’t let there be any issues, you’re sure as hell not going to give him the satisfaction of causing any.
So, instead, you return his nod. “Coach,” you greet him. As he puts his things on the desk opposite yours, your heart falls into your stomach, “A-Are we…”
“Sharing an office?” he finishes for you. You nod weakly. “Yeah.”
“Oh,” you say, then awkwardly add, “Fun.”
“I’m over the fucking moon,” he deadpans.
You bite your tongue, trying not to retort too quickly to a comment like that. You look away from him and to the keys in his hand and you prepare for the small talk you’re about to force yourself to engage in. “Tough ride in?”
It seems to take him a moment to process the question. The awkwardness of it all lingers. “Something like that,” he answers. However, his gaze is stuck on the picture in your hand. “What the fuck is that?”
Your brows furrow and you glance down. So much for small talk. “This?” You hold up the photo. “Oh, this is, uh, Oliver. Mel and Paige’s son.”
“Fuck off,” Roy says in a way that’s almost inquisitive, though the relief in his voice is palpable. You try to ignore that. “I didn’t know they had a kid.”
You huff a laugh despite yourself, and a bit of weight falls from your shoulders. “You clearly don’t follow Mel on anything,” you reply, then pause. “Oh, wait. I forgot. You don’t do social media.”
“It’s a waste of fucking time,” he says, reaching out to look at the photo. When you hand it to him, he mutters, “I think Rivera would have me blocked if I did, though.”
“Yeah, you’re not wrong,” you say honestly. You take the picture back from him and place it on your desk. Your next question comes out casual, and you can’t help but be proud of how nicely this is all flowing. “Speaking of kids, how’s Phoebe doing? And how’s Molly?”
You’re not expecting the hint of shock on Roy’s face when you turn back to him. It’s as if he can’t believe you’ve remembered his sister’s name, or his niece that you met when she was no more than six months old. You want to slap him upside the head for looking at you like that because, of course, you fucking remember that, but a knock on the door from the other room interrupts your conversation.
Trent’s standing hesitantly in the doorway, notepad in hand. “Sorry to interrupt,” he says, and he appears to be avoiding eye contact with Roy. “But if you were serious about talking, would you be free to do it tomorrow?”
You offer him a warm smile, hoping that’ll contrast Roy’s crossed arms and hard stare directed at him. “Sure thing.”
“No,” Roy immediately says. “You’re not fucking talking to him.”
Confusion takes over. “Why not?” you ask.
“Because no one’s fucking talking to him,” is Roy’s answer, firm, with no room for argument. His eyes never leave Trent. “And don’t try to fucking weasel your way into this team through someone who doesn’t fucking know any better, Crimm. You’re fucking better than that.”
You’re gaping at Roy as Trent nods at you kindly and retreats into the locker room. When you look back into the office to see if you can get some clarity from one of your other new colleagues, you notice that they’re both missing. Ted did say they had to set some things up.
You suppose that just gives you the ability to talk freely to Roy now.
“I’m sorry,” you say, whipping back to Roy who’s already facing his desk. “Has he not been given the O-K to write a book about this team?”
Roy grunts. “He has. But it doesn’t mean we’re fucking talking to him.”
“Well, doesn’t that, like, defeat the purpose of him writing a book?”
“You’re catching on.”
You lean back against your desk, folding your arms to take on Roy’s previous stance. “Oh, I see,” you say in understanding. “This is a Kent Rule.”
He doesn’t have to be facing you for you to know he rolled his eyes. “No, it’s not.”
“Oh, it’s totally a Kent Rule.” You stare at his back as he shifts his shoulders in discomfort. “You hate him, so you’re forcing the team to hate him. Enemy mine is enemy yours? That’s Kent Rule number three, if I’m remembering correctly.”
“It’s a team rule,” he states. “I’m just enforcing it.”
“Right,” you agree, though your voice says differently. “Each person here hates him so much that they allowed him to write a book here.”
Roy shakes his head with a scoff. “Fuck’s sake, I forgot how fucking irritating you were.”
“I’m not being irritating. You’re being evasive.” You only get another grunt in response. Fed up, your frustration at his lack of an explanation starts to seep into your tone. “So, what? I’m just supposed to ice that nice guy out because you say so?”
When Roy finally looks at you, he’s scowling. “He’s not fucking nice,” he says. “And you don’t know anything.”
“I don’t know anything because you won’t tell me,” you argue. 
“My word’s not good enough?”
You glare at him. “Your word hasn’t been good enough in eight fucking years.”
Roy shakes his head, almost in disbelief. “Definitely not telling you now.”
“Okay, enough,” you say, scanning the room and the hall to make sure no one’s watching the two of you. You put a hand up before he can retaliate with anything. “Look, if this is gonna work, you have to tell me things, okay? And we can’t argue here. Not here.” You motion to the office around you. “I can’t work with that shit. Alright?”
For a moment, it’s like you can look into Roy’s mind. You watch him appear to recount last week’s talk, just as you did minutes ago. Professional. Civil. No issues.
“Fine,” he finally sighs, knowing you’re right. 
“Fine,” you reply. You take a breath. “So, if he sucks and you don’t want me to talk to him, you need to tell me why. You can’t just order me around like I’m one of the guys, especially not in front of people. I’m your equal here, Roy. Whether you like it or not.”
Roy shakes his head. “You’ve always been my equal,” he says, though it’s a bit softer. “You fucking know that.”
His words leave a lump in your throat that you’re not anticipating. “Well, you’re not acting like it.”
His head tilts back, eyes falling shut. His shoulders tense up. Heavy sigh. Dear God, he really doesn’t want to tell you, huh?
And then it hits you. Oh, fuck does it hit you. He doesn’t want to tell you. 
And you get why.
Roy’s talking as soon as you open your mouth to apologize for pushing him. “The others don’t know either. I’ll tell you when I tell them,” he offers. “That’s the fucking best you’re getting from me.”
Your tongue feels heavy in your mouth, so you offer a nod. “Fine,” you say softly.
The nod is returned. “Fine.”
The conversation feels finished, but there’s still one more thing you want to say. “And can we agree right here that we’re not going to argue in front of anyone? Just like you said?” you ask. “Like, if you want to pick a fight, just like, pull me into the Boot Room or something. This shit can’t affect the way we do our jobs.”
Humor slants Roy’s expression. “Boot Room fights?”
You roll your eyes. “You know what I mean. Not in front of the team.”
“Yeah, I got it,” he says with a nod. “Fine.”
“Fine.”
From the outside of the office, you can hear the team start to file into the locker room from their gym facility, laughing just the same as when you heard them earlier. The alone sound makes you tense up. Roy narrows his eyes at you. 
“Speaking of,” he says cautiously. “I think it might be time for your introduction. Hope you like primary school-level art done by grown fucking men.”
That takes you out of your headspace immediately. “I’m sorry, what?”
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LONDON OLYMPICS. (LATE JULY, 2012.)
Mabley Green. Friday. 23:30.
Wear some training gear.
I can send a car for you so you know you’re not being murdered.
You’d read the three messages you’d received two days ago from Roy Kent about a million times. While you’d replied to him that his sending a car felt very mafia boss and definitely doesn’t eliminate the murder possibility, you’d still gathered up the courage to dress up in your nicest sweats, escape from the Village after the Opening Ceremony festivities, and meet his driver on the outskirts.
(Of course, you said yes to the driver. Roy Kent was fucking loaded and if he were going to be strange and summon you places, you were going to take his free transportation.)
You’d confirmed your whereabouts and situation approximately thirty-five thousand times to Mel, who had nothing but questions for you. 
“Roy Kent. Like Chelsea’s finest, here, there, every fucking where Roy Kent?” That’s the one.
“Is sending a car for you to go to where?” I don’t know, it looks like a soccer field. 
“To do what?” Battle Pokemon. I don’t fucking know, Mel. I think he wants to train me.
“Train you or train you?” Why are you saying it like that?
“Because this has to be a weird hook-up thing that famous footballers do, right?” He made it very clear he had no interest. Also, pause. What about me says I’d fuck on a pitch?
“He could bring an air mattress.” Oh my God, I’m leaving.
But as you arrived to this completely empty field, with nobody but your overly friendly driver, Roger to back you up, you couldn’t help but feel a little nervous. This was weird, wasn’t it? You were meeting up with this guy you barely knew at an abandoned location just because he told you that you were an overthinker? Your mother would be absolutely horrified if she knew. You’d broken just about every Stranger Danger rule she’d set.
However, the second that you stepped out of the car to see Roy illuminated by the field lights, standing with his hood up and a bag of footballs thrown over his shoulder, you knew this was legit. And the anxiety washed away. But a few of the nerves stayed.
“Glad you showed,” he greets, turning to walk to the field as you fell into step with him.
You look over at him expectantly. “So, you are coaching me.”
“No, I’m fucking not,” he says. “I just want to get you out of your head.”
You nod in faux agreement. “Right. Because that’s not coaching.”
Roy rolls his eyes. “No, it’s not. It’s called being a nice fucking person.” 
“Right,” you say again. “Because Roy Kent is known best for his kindness.”
He turns to you. Something sparks in you when you notice that he appears to be humored by all of this. “You should be thanking me.”
“Of course. I’m sorry,” you apologize, sending him a wide smile as you two make it to the field. “Thank you, Coach.” Roy rolls his eyes again and you chuckle softly. “I’ll thank you when I know for a fact you’re not gonna murder me.”
He watches as you plop yourself down on the pitch to stretch a bit. “If I was going to kill you, I wouldn’t have brought a fucking witness.”
“I don’t know,” you shrug. “Roger could be your Ryan Gosling.”
Roy actually laughs at that one. It’s a sound that you’d never expected to hear, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t want to hear it again. “I wouldn’t trust him to do that kind of driving. Chatty prick can barely get around London.”
“Hey,” you chide. “He was very nice.”
“He’s fucking incredible. Been with him since my Sunderland days. Still a chatty prick.”
You can’t help but smile at the fondness that’s crept into his voice, but you say nothing about it. You bring your knee to your chest in a stretch and look up at him. “So, what’s the plan here, Coach?”
“Not your coach.”
“Right, sorry. What’s the plan here, Zodiac?”
Roy shakes his head, fighting to keep his lips even. “I want to make a deal with you.”
“A deal?” you ask. “What kind of deal?”
“I’ll train with you until your team's out,” he says. “Whenever our match schedules align, we can figure out a time to do shit until you need to go home.”
Your smile turns cocky. “And if we win?”
He practically snorts. “You’re not going to win.”
“But if we do?”
“Then we’ll train until then,” he replies. “And I’ll give you whatever you fucking want.”
You’re not sure what that entails, but anything you want from Roy fucking Kent? It’s an offer that may be too good to pass up. But still, one question lingers. “In exchange for what?”
“What?” he asks.
You stand, lifting one of your feet from the ground so that you can pull it up behind you in another stretch. “A deal works two ways. Exchanging goods or services and all that,” you tell him. “What’s in it for you?”
Roy shrugs. “I need to train too,” he answers. It's a bit simple, a bit evasive. “That’s what’s in it for me.”
“Oh, c’mon,” you say, “you can’t be serious. You want to train with me just to train?”
“What’s wrong with that?” he asked, crossing his arms.
“Nothing,” you respond, slowly realizing he’s serious. “I guess I just kind of assumed when I heard ‘deal’ that you’d want something in return.”
“Well, that’s all I fucking want,” he tells you. “If I think of anything else you can do for me, I’ll let you know.” 
A mix between a scoff and a laugh escapes you. “I’ll be anxiously anticipating your demands.”
He’s turned to his bag of footballs and crouches to grab one, glancing up at you as he rises. “So?” he asks. “Do we have a fucking deal, or what?”
Your foot goes down as you look at him, evaluating him and his offer. You shift your gaze to the field, to the big lights around you, then to the night sky that tells you it’s almost the next day. 
You have a game in Glasgow again tomorrow against Colombia. You’re out past curfew and know your team would both kill you and congratulate you if they knew where you were. You have to be on a bus in less than eight hours. 
But here’s Roy Kent, standing with you on an abandoned pitch in London, offering to train with you. And what kind of idiot passes that up?
“Deal,” you agree, taking the ball from his hand. “Now, where do we start?”
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(mini!) TAGLIST: @tegan8314, @csigeoblue, @confessionsofatotaldramaslut
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sprout-fics · 1 year
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I want to write a fanfic but I’m scared people will either judge my writing skills or what the fic is about, do you have any advice for people who struggle to post their fic?
My first and foremost advice for fic has always been write for you. Write the things you want, how you want, and when you want. Nobody else gets to dictate those choices but you. It's true there's been a rising tide of entitlement in fandoms recently, and I can understand being hesitant about posting fic for the first time because of that. However there is so much joy to be had writing fanfic. So many of the people I hold dear are friends and fellow writers I've met through fanfic. No matter what you write or how you write it, there is a place for you.
I posted my first fic back in...2012? Christ... and was very nervous. Gonna be honest, my writing then was not great! But that's hobbies in general. People aren't born with the inherent ability to write perfectly, it's a skill that's honed over time. I myself am still improving and finding news and better ways to tell stories. Part of that is resigning myself to the fact that sometimes I have to write badly to be better. However it could be you have a natural born talent and your potential readers have been waiting to see it!
You may not get much of a response first from folks, that's to be expected. However that's all the more reason why you should be focusing on things that are fulfilling for yourself and not others. I've seen folks fandom chase and trope chase on here and I see how burnt out they get in pursuit of interaction. It's a losing game, and I hope you don't fall prey to it.
In addition, remember to tag. I've had and seen plenty of cases where someone reads a fic with something they don't like and then complains despite the fact it was tagged. If someone does this to you, and I cannot emphasize enough, it is not your problem. It's like someone hating coconut and then seeing a coconut flavored dessert and going 'Wow, this looks delicious- why is there coconut in this?!' It is their responsibility for curating their experience. Not yours. Delete/block/ignore them and move on.
and to those reading this who are readers and not writers- be kind to beginning writers. Do not offer them (or ANYONE) unsolicited feedback. No 'concrit' unless SPECIFICALLY ASKED FOR. I've heard people say 'Oh I stay away from the 'my first fic' tag'. Consider giving those writers a chance. Leave a lovely comment. You have no idea how encouraging that can be for someone new to fanfic. By doing so you are cultivating a community, a place for all of us.
and anon, honey? You're doing great. I'm proud of you. Let us know how it goes.
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drunktuesdays · 1 year
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coming out of the ground to say that your fics have meant SO MUCH to me over the years to the point where they have infected not just my vocab but my literal thoughts. you are just so talented and your writing style is so addictive I've been coming back to it for years like a comfort blanket. I accidentally found out that my friend started fucking his ex boyfriend AGAIN and when I saw him in person I was looking at him in silent judgement like 'I know you skanked it up with [redacted] last night and I’m judging you' and then I was like fuck!! Lea!! she is with me!!!! very much like jesus, yes?
this is honestly so nice i might cry. the idea that a throwaway line from a fic i wrote in 2012 stuck with you eleven years later is really emotional. like, not in a "wow i must be A Great Writer" way but in that very meaningful "we have no idea what impact we have" way. anyway!!!!!!!!!! thank you for being very nice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you made my day, especially in a time where i'm not really writing that much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love you, just like jesus!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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thegeminisage · 2 months
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i'm 'tell me what it was like in 2014' anon and can i just say. i am so honored by the time and care you put into that answer. WOW. it was such a delight to read and kind of vicariously experience. i'm 18 now so i was 9 when winter soldier came out, needless to say it was not really on my radar. But i've always been interested in those kind of golden tumblr age fandoms (doing destiel from 2020-2022 was like. the best experience of my lifeeee) and even like in middle school i was scrolling through pinterest screenshots of avengers incorrect quotes etc. that creative generativeness and collective celebration seems like. such a utopia honestly. what you described, and the cultural context of it being the mid 2010s and how media and politics and the internet wereback then seems so perfectly aligned. i'm happy you got to experience something so special! re: not easily conquered. i read it a few years ago just because of how renowned it was and. well you KNOW. and anyway the crazy fucking whiplash i got from realizing the supernatural blogger i followed later was EMILY??. the fandom's interest in history and culture is also especially beautiful to me. i will literally never see the winged victory the same way again. ik people always say fics written 2012-2015 have crack in them but stucky was on another level. people were doing literal highbrow analysis and art..that banana fic. i have i love you like rlb saved on my notes app from like 2018 when i was in middle school. the dedication and like crazy amount of work that went into the fandom is just out of this world to me. like i'd give my soul to be there honestly.. you just dont get things like that anymore. again thank you so so much for your wonderful long answer, and like honestly. if i ever pursue some project on fandom history i might ask to interview you or sth. but anyway, suffice it to say: i really really wish i could have gotten to see it first hand, but thank goodness i can still go back and read fic and look at fanart and. thank you it's been long long time by helen forrest. and i''m so glad people who were active online then are still on tumblr to talk about it all
hi sorry it took me a minute to reply i was doing accursed ten year rewatch of Movie. i have an extended reply.
you should listen to this...someone sent this to my friend and it unlocked memories i didn't knew i had
much like rlb, which was insane of you to remember, because i sure didn't. dropped that on the groupchat earlier and got to gleefully watch the horror of memories unlocked unfold on their faces
also so true about destiel tumblr. sustained madness. i romanticized stucky tumblr a little in my answer bc of nostalgia like i wasn't also making mortal enemies at the same time (i sometimes spot the urls of people who made me mad back then and have a ratatouille flashback) i was making those lifelong friends BUT you're not missing anything major bc the destiel madness FAR exceeded the stucky madness. there was just so much more mania to it.
when i was in high school i had the enduring desire to have been born in the 60s so i could be a hippie full time. i thought their clothes and anti-establishment attitudes were groovy. i feel like this is you about mid-2010s tumblr and i absolutely love that for you.
that said, you may not get movies like cap2 anymore but you will certainly get fandoms like it...i recently got into trek and reading spockanalia and all their vintage fic from the 60s and 70s and 80s and seeing in some ways how spock shock is so similar to destiel madness (and THEY didn't even have the internet) has taught me that the girlies gender neutral have been out here and primed to go insane from day one and that as long as there are mentally ill teens and 20-somethings who like media there will always be people who go insane about the media. they will grow into the 30-somethings and 40-somethings and higher that write the good fic and sell the smutty fanzines under the tables at cons. there will never be another tos or cap2 or nov 5 but certainly there will always be SOMETHING to go joyfully nuts about on the internet. the tricky part is just finding ur people
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cielsosinfel · 2 months
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its 4am so i need to log OFF and go to BED but my mind is spinning with dishonored dishonored dishonored. this game really meant the world to me when i was... fucking... 18 years old lmao wow. i'm really not very far at all, i have just made my way to Claring Blvd, but some thoughts, i guess:
for a game that came out on consoles in 2012, it looks amazing. the stylization aged very VERY well even if some gameplay elements didn't. (and to be honest, the gameplay isn't as clunky as i was worrying it'd be.) (i do think there must have been a better, less confusing button mapping option for sneak-stabbing vs sneak-choking.)
i still love how beat up everyone's faces look in this. though, the women could stand to be more beat up and have more varied face shapes. also the NOSES
forgot that literally everyone wears pants because apparently skirts and dresses don't exist in the dishonoredverse? at least not in dunwall. which seems very fitting tbf.
the amount of thought and depth poured into the lore of the world dishonored takes place in, the amount of WORLDBUILDING, when you never even leave the walls of dunwall, is still one of my favorite things about it. i think the writers in charge of the flavor text strewn about as notes and books did a good job giving all of these details that flesh the setting out but still leave so much mystery that could be expanded on.
i love the atmosphere obviously but i love the just, entire atmosphere around the whales in this universe, their place in the world and its foundational myths and religions and the economic exploitation, everything it symbolizes for THESE ancient, magical leviathans to be brutally killed en masse to be rendered down to oil and heretical charms. and it reminds me yet again, of the common fanon of pre-DH2 fandom, where the outsider was a whale, or something older than the whales who brought them forth into the world or merely has a particular fondness and affinity for them, and he was never a human in anything but false flesh, only worn to put the mortals who reach out to him at something like ease, or just acknowledge the limitations of these beings who can't fathom whale song. what i'm saying is, i'm really still annoyed they canonized the whole "teenaged sacrifice victim" origin for him instead of having more fun with the magical ancient whales stuff u_u
something i hadn't noticed until this replay is the voice acting is very flat? i think it's easy to tell it's a voice direction thing. like, wow, so many charactes just speak Very Flat, almost monotone at times. it does take me out of the dialogue, ngl. i think as a 17/18 year old i wasn't paying nearly as much attention to like, writing and acting as i do now, so its sticking out. havelock especially sticks out. also funny to realize just how many background NPCs are voiced by the same three or four VAs...
the heart mechanic is still one of the most fun and enjoyable game mechanic gimmicks that ties in SO perfectly with the narrative itself. it's also just so funny to imagine corvo following people around the hound's pit, like barely a foot away from their back, holding a freshly-beating heart in his hand and burning a hole into the other person's head with such an INTENSITY trying to wring every little observation out of the lump of metal-choked flesh he holds (while the heart tells him how god dang suicidal they are. oh lydia and cecelia)
i'm thinking of all the woobie corvo angst fics i ever read where the heart is basically an emotional support haunted organ and going wuwuwuwu while i replay
i think now, as a 30 year old gay man instead of a teen girl, i desire samuel carnally (more specifically desire to see him and corvo fuck each other senseless) even MORE STRONGLY
ok i gotta do homework today good night
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roseheartslutwife · 2 years
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ALRIGHT SO (this ask is sponsored by nord VPN bc i had to use it to watch the lorax 2012 as i type this and my idea isn’t really too slow burn it’s more just a thing i’m thinking about him)
what if you just put all the characters in high school and onceler finds his partner sobbing in the hallway bc they’re being bullied, but he isn’t ready to confess his feelings for them so he just very awkwardly tries to comfort them then reader kinda just pulls him into a hug and he kinda just sits there wondering what to do
sorry this is so ramble-y 😭
:*:·Roy x Geno (lolz)·:*·°★* 
Topic: slow burn(?) (I don't think it's actually slowburn idk I suck)
C/W: Roy being an idiot sometimes, this fanfic is a short one because im not good at slow burns lol
A/n: Yes we love a VPN sponsor!! Also this fic got changed to someone else but this fic is mainly for my fav sibling so I hope u enjoy it Geno!! And happy Halloween!!
A/n: (for everyone) the person requesting this is geno soo yea!! Pls enjoy geno I hope this isn't sucky
↓ ♡ ↓
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"where is that noise coming from..?" Roy said to himself and tried to follow where the voice is coming from. as he kept following the noise the noises cry louder and louder, he then found a someone crying under a tall fluffy tree, he then walked over to the person to check up on them to see if they are ok
"Um excuse me?" Roy said to the crying person, the person who was crying looked up with their blood shot eyes so they can see who the person is, "huh? Oh sorry am I not supposed to be here?" the person asked "no no you can stay here it's just..are you ok?" Roy asked
"Not really, I don't necessarily feel good...one of my friends isn't here and I've just been here almost the whole day" the person replied "oh, well do you mind if I sit here?" Roy asked "go ahead I don't really care" the person replied
Roy sat down next to the person and started asking questions about why they are crying, and other things for try and comfort them...roy isn't the best at comforting he gets awkward at times but still tries his best
★Time skip to like few hours later★
"Wow really?!" Roy said "yea! It was funny it was a huge mess and stuff but thankfully it was all outside!!" the person replied, then sighed and looked down. "Thank you for this by the way" the person said
Roy nodded, "anytime, I'm glad I could help", "oh wow it's getting pretty late I have to go" the person said while looking at their phone "aw really? I was just enjoying the convo!!" Roy said "yea sorry but hey!! Here is my number so w can keep talking I really enjoyed talking to you!!" the person said
Roy took and the number and nodded and was about to walk away but then remembered for say something "hey wait! What's you name I never for it!!" Roy said, the person looked back and replied. "It's Geno", Roy nodded and replied with his name "mine is Roy!!" and then ran off giggling
« ⋅Time skip to like few months now⋅ »
After that moment, Roy started to feel very attracted to Geno, Roy couldn't figure it out but he knew he was in love with him
Roy knew he was also bisexual and lean towards men but he didn't know it was this bad but it was still in a good way
"God I'm gay.." he said
Roy looked at his phone and pulled up geno's contact and decided to text them about his feelings. He was gonna confess
(Blue is roy and green is Geno)
"Hey Geno, I need to tell you something"
"Sure what's up?!"
"I need to get this off of my chest but... I am in love with you. Ive been in love with you for a long time no words can describe it...will you go out with me?"
"Oh roy...i feel the same way!! I would totally go out with you!!
"Really?! Oh that great I got so scared.. Also I need to tell you something else.."
"What's up?"
"Did you know ice is ice?"
«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
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fbfh · 3 years
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edward cullen dating hcs
wc: ~550
warnings: standard vampire/twilight fare, not proof read
Okay I want you to imagine every fic you read between 2012 -2015 that involved arranged marriages, rich love interests, ceos, the Mafia (but like the super fancy kind not the gritty kind) or any other plot that involved y/n being swept up into the lap of luxury by a lusty doting love interest
Every single moment from all of those fics that made your heart flutter
That's what it's like dating edward cullen
Being around him is like stepping outside after the first snow of the season
The air has moved from crisp to sharp, all the background noise is dampened, everything is still even when its in motion
He has an insane amount of self control and restraint
So every move he makes is deliberate and intentional
Physical or otherwise
You know there's meaning to everything he does
There are some moments
Like when he's just so overwhelmed with love for you that this beautiful laugh will bubble up
Or he'll just smile and shake his head and look at you
That always means the most to you
Those organic moments
Oh
Another deliberate thing he does that makes your heart race
Is sometimes he’ll sigh against your face
Or let out a little breath on the back of your neck
Which doesn’t seem like much at first
But then you remember he doesn’t have to breathe
And doesn’t usually
He’s literally just doing this to fluster you
And boom
Heart go :pregnant:
Okay so
We all know he’s cold
Like temperature wise
But it’s not like
Uncomfortable cold
Yk the feeling when you finally get to sit in front of an AC or fan when you’re really hot
It’s that kind of cold
Like
Refreshing
If he can read your mind
You’ll just be minding your own business
And of course your thoughts drift to him
How amazing he is
How hot he is
Then all of a sudden he’ll just fuckin
Materialize behind you
He’ll trace a cool finger down the back of your neck
“I’m flattered. I didn’t know you thought so highly of me.”
He’ll murmur, breathing into your ear
He ghosts his way closer to you, a hand resting on your waist
His lips hover just above your cheekbone drawing closer
Oh my fucking god the tension this man can create
Probably doesn’t need to be said but communication with him is top tier
You just need to think something real hard at him and he’ll be like
“... oh wow. Do you want to talk about it?”
The answer is yes, you do
He has this magnetic aura that just
Draws you to him
Everything about me invites you in
Okay so yk when you eat something minty and then drink ice water
That’s what kissing Edward is like
Jk
Unless
He’s never experienced getting so much serotonin from one person before
He watches you so attentively
Like when you wiggle a string in front of a cat
~enraptured~
He really can not get enough of you
And you can’t get enough of him
Which is good bc depending on how the whole permanent neck nibbles thing goes, you might have forever together
Literally
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hiddlesbummmm · 3 years
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Here is the Peter X Loki fic requested by anon! You can read the original prompt here
Thank you for the request, I absolutely loved writing this! I hope you enjoy 😁💕
Next on my list is a Bucky X Reader fic requested by an Anon! Stay tuned for that one in (hopefully) a few days!
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Warnings: SFW Tickle fic
Words: 2534 Lee Peter X Ler Loki
Learning Humanity
Patience was not in Loki’s nature. Due to him being the God of Mischief, he tended to be blunt, stubborn, impatient, and of course mischievous. On the outside, Loki appeared uncaring and unbothered by Midgardian emotions. But, those close to him, knew this was inaccurate. For those close to Loki, he was actually quite open, caring, and attentive to their needs. Yes, he poked fun at these emotions, but he truly did care for his friends and family. Once his tough-guy facade was dropped, he was one of the best listeners in the compound.
Many of the other avengers constantly used Loki as a backboard to bounce ideas off of or to vent about something another teammate did or how a mission went array. Mostly because he was unbiased and looked at the situation in full instead of the character of the person who brought up the idea. He was well trusted and gave good advice.
Now, there was one person in the compound who had reserved a very soft spot in Loki’s heart. Your first assumption would probably be his older brother Thor, but you would be wrong. Of course, Thor reserved a huge chunk of Loki’s time, respect, and love. But, there was also another person with who Loki truly cared for and bonded. This person happened to be Peter Parker.
Maybe it was because Peter was a constant reminder of Loki’s youth. Peter took after the God by being a very brilliant prankster. Of course, Peter had never attempted to prank Loki before, but Loki was impressed, to say the least. Peter didn’t know that for lots of his pranks, Loki would be lurking nearby, baffled by the creativity of the young teenager.
Growing up, Loki was of course quite a trickster. But eventually, he had to back off because Lady Sif had had enough of his silliness and took matters into her own hands. Loki would never wish the wrath of Sif onto anyone.
Even though Peter did get on some people's nerves, his pranks were harmless enough that no real punishment ever occurred. Peter had an innocent aura that radiated around him, so even when he was caught dead in the act of something mischievous, he often was able to stutter his way out of it. His face would turn beet red, and he would cower like a hurt puppy dog. This induced a high level of pity on the boy, and he was able to escape any ratifications. Loki heavily praised him for that skill.
This was why Loki had such a soft spot for the boy. Peter was just like a younger brother to Loki. He had always dreamed of having a younger sibling in his life. Thor was a great older brother, but sometimes Loki wished he himself could fill the role of being the big brother. He wanted to be someone the youth looked up to, came to for support, and slightly feared.
Peter, an only child, of course, loved the attention he received from Loki. Especially when he pulled off a decent prank. Growing up, he was absolutely terrified of Loki because of the 2012 alien invasion. But after living with the God for a few months, Peter decided he wasn’t that bad after all. He was just another victim of manipulation and mind control whose image had been warped by the media.
Peter liked talking with Loki mainly because he didn’t feel embarrassed about discussing his failures with him. As much as Peter loved and respected Tony, sometimes he felt like nothing he did would ever be good enough for him. Loki never gave off that vibe. Loki always teased Peter of course whenever he stopped by the library to ask for help. He would say “Wow. You must be truly desperate to come to me for help”. But then after making Peter chuckle, he would place his book back on the coffee table and take a look at Peter’s blueprints.
After months of bonding, the unlikely duo ruled the compound in prank wars and compassion. Thor was especially pleased to see Loki fitting in much better now with Earth's mightiest heroes. Loki enjoyed fulfilling Peter’s knack of curiosity about Asgard and all things alien. Loki even took the time to train Peter in some Asgardian hand-to-hand combat.
Although he wouldn’t say it out loud, Loki missed the boy while he was away at school. Loki didn’t relate as well to his other teammates and so he more often than not subjected himself to reading by himself in his room or library. He did enjoy when he was invited to play poker or any other board game, but it was never the same without Peter’s high amounts of energy shifting the moods of everyone he was around.
This is why Loki truly regrets the day he made the poor boy cry. Loki struggled with controlling his rage, and up until this point was able to push those emotions aside. But, for some reason, he was not able to control himself the day Peter broke his mother's vase.
The day started like usual. It was a Saturday so Peter didn’t have to go to school. The compound was scarce due to most of the team being on a mission somewhere in Africa. Steve decided Loki’s services were not needed this trip and asked him to hang back and keep an eye on the teenager. Loki happily obliged since he didn’t feel like going on a mission this time around.
Since most of the team of gone, Loki thought it would be fitting to teach Peter the skills of being stealthy. Peter was great at sneaking around and swinging up into rafters of buildings to hide. But, without his webs, he was pretty clunky on his feet.
Loki thought it would be wise to teach him these skills in case he gets into a situation where his web-shooters become disarmed or something. Peter was happy to learn from an experienced fighter and gleefully obliged to the training.
In this exercise, the game was similar to hide and seek. Peter was to sneak around the compound and see how long it would take for Loki to catch up to him. The only rule was Peter could not climb anything, and he could not settle down and hide for more than 5 minutes in a single spot. If Peter could avoid Loki for more than an hour, Loki promised he would allow the boy to try a sip of one of his special Asgardian spirits. That alone was enough to get the boy buzzed. Obviously Tony would never let this happen, so it was perfect he was on the mission.
Peter disappeared into the darkness of the compound as Loki counted to 100, giving Peter ample time to put some distance between themselves. Once he reached 100, Loki wandered around looking for the boy. Loki looked in the usual spots the boy liked to hang out. The kitchen, the common room, the gym, but there was no trace of the spider. Loki glanced at his timer and realized it had been 45 minutes somehow and he needed to hurry up or he would lose the challenge. Loki quietly stalked down the hallway leading to the living quarters and paused when he thought he heard something in the distance.
Listening intently, he heard a crashing sound and very quiet “ Oh shit” echoing down the hallway. Smirking, Loki bounded down the halls to find the culprit. He rounded the corner and noticed his bedroom door was agape. The silly boy had chosen to hide in his room. Clever, but not clever enough.
Loki jumped into his room to surprise the boy when he froze in his steps once he saw the scene laid out in front of him.
Peter was crouched next to Loki’s bookshelf hurriedly picking up pieces of broken glass. Loki flicked on the light to see what it was half expecting it to be a random coffee mug he haphazardly left in his room. But, to Loki’s horror, it was actually something much more important. It was a vase his mother had gotten him.
Now, Loki wasn’t a sentimental person, but just having the presence of an object that was so loved by his mother put his heart at ease. Frigga had given this to Loki upon his return to Asgard after the 2012 earth invasion. It was her way of showing that she still loved him even after the horrible things he had done. She would replace the flowers inside the vase weekly outside of Loki’s prison cell so he would have a constant reminder of her love.
Seeing that precious vase laying on the floor shattered to pieces caused Loki’s blood to boil. Without processing his next words he spat hateful things at Peter.
“You clumsy incompetent swine! I can’t believe that out of pure stupidity you waltzed into my room and destroyed something so priceless. You will never be a good fighter since you can’t even pay attention to your immediate surroundings without an ounce of danger in your presence.”
Loki’s harsh tone sliced through the air and pierced Peter deeply. Peter opened his mouth to apologize but nothing came out. His head hung low as he ran from the room, tears running down his cheek as he couldn’t hold them back.
The moment Peter disappeared from view, Loki was filled with guilt. How could he say such horrid things to Peter!? His mother would have most definitely scolded him if he ever talked to Thor that way. Loki was supposed to be the role model, and instead, he snapped and chewed up the kid for something that was a complete and utter accident. Loki could fix it with his magic if he really wanted to! Filled with regret, Loki went in search of Peter to give him a proper apology.
It didn’t take long to find the young boy. He was laying down on a couch in the common room, with his feet on the cushions and his knees tucked into his chest. Peter was no longer crying, but his eyes were still puffy and red. Loki walked over to the boy and gestured his interest in sitting down. Peter nodded and Loki sat down by his feet.
It was silent for a few moments until Loki spoke up.
“ Peter, you have no idea how incredibly sorry I am for the way I spoke to you. I should have held my tongue and not snapped like I did. You are like my little brother, and I should have treated you with the utmost respect. Will you please forgive me?”
Peter swallowed as he turned to lay on his back so he could see Loki face to face. Peter was never one to hold a grudge and he could see the sadness behind Loki’s eyes as he truly meant the words he spoke.
“ I I I forgive you. I re-really am sorry for breaking that vase. I uh should have paid more attention to my surroundings. Will you keep training me?”
Loki was tempted to hug the boy but fought against it because he didn’t want to invade his space while his emotions were high.
“ Peter, of course, I will still train you. It was a silly thing for me to get upset about. I can always fix it with my magic”. Loki looked down at his lap.
“ Well, what’s so important about that vase anyway? It obviously must mean something to you?” Peter trod lightly.
With a sideward glance, Loki chuckled and explained the history of the vase. Peter listened intently and now deeply understood Loki’s frustration and anger.
While Loki was telling the tale, he happened to place a hand on Peter’s foot that had made its way into his lap. Accidentally brushing his sole, Peter let out a shriek and clamped his hand over his mouth.
A mischievous twinkle appeared his Loki’s eyes as he realized what he had done. Gripping Peter’s foot tightly now, he smirked at the boy.
“ Well well well. It appears you are rather ticklish. How perfect the timing! I can’t let you stay sad forever, how about I cheer you up?”
Apparently, Peter’s feet were one of his worst spots because the moment Loki scratched 5 of his fingers against the sole, Peter howled and violently tried to shake his foot out of Loki’s grasp. Loki sneered as he pulled Peter closer to him and swiftly sat in his shins to hold his feet in place. Loki scribbled all over his feet and learned that when he swiped under his toes, Peter would squeal.
“ PLEHEHEASE LOKI IHHH AM NOT SAHAHAD ANYMORE”
Loki released his torturous grip on his feet and switch to his belly. Peter was already weakened by the previous attack, so he just allowed Loki to poke and prod at his stomach.
“ Wow. I never knew you could make such cute noises.” Loki teased as Peter quickly covered his face with his hands.
“ Hey! Don’t you be hiding your laughter from me boy!” Loki said as he dove his hands under the boy's arms. Peter slammed his arms down and started giggling like crazy.
“ Okayahaha Lo-Loki! I’m all chehehered up now!”
Loki could tell Peter was getting close to tapping out, so he stopped his tickling to allow the boy to breathe.
“ Okay okay. I see that smile. I guess you aren’t sad anymore. But just to make sure that frown doesn’t come back, I have one more thing in store for you” Loki grinned and quickly leaned down to blow a raspberry on Peter’s now exposed stomach.
Blow after blow caused Peter to just throw his head back, squint his eyes shut, and let deep belly laughter escape from his mouth. To make things even worse, Loki also spidered up one of his sides at the same time just to throw his nerves on the edge.
Once his laughter turned to coughs and hiccups, Loki relented his attack for good.
“Ehehe please do-don’t tell the others about this hehe. I can’t stand *hiccup* any more teasing.”
Loki chuckled and nodded. “ Of course. I want to keep this cute little tickle toy to myself now”. He reached over and pinched Peter’s beet red cheek.
“ In all seriousness, I really do regret all the things I said to you. How about I make it up to you and allow you to try my spirits as well as show you how I can fix the vase?”
Peter nodded gleefully and together the brothers from other mothers went in search of the liquor cabinet.
The night was then filled with even more helpless giggles as the unlikely duo stayed up late telling each other embarrassing tales and participating in more tickle fights until they both fell asleep on the ground.
When the team returned the following morning, they all chuckled seeing the two of them sleeping on the floor in the common room. They didn’t know what had happened that previous night, but we’re glad to see Loki learning the ropes of humanity.
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babycharmander · 2 years
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Let's go with a throwback here... GLaDOS?
First impression: So like, my first exposure to Portal beyond hearing "THE CAKE IS A LIE" everywhere was, to the best of my memory, a kinda edgy fan animation with a weird interpretation of GLaDOS (since GLaDOS didn't have her iconic Portal 2 look yet, she was just portrayed as a generic pixel computer face) and I just remember thinking "wow this is really dumb, why do people like this song??" But upon actually playing the first game, I found her TERRIFYING. I got scared playing the original game for the first time back in 2012.
Impression now: I still find her somewhat scary, but I've come to appreciate how hilarious she is too, and just how overall heartbreaking her character is. She's a dang good character.
Favorite moment: GOSH HOW THE HECK DO I CHOOSE THAT?? Like, as far as dialogue goes, one of my favorite lines of hers is, "Here come the test results: 'You are a horrible person.' That's what it says. 'A horrible person.' We weren't even testing for that." and also "THE BIRTH PARENTS YOU ARE TRYING TO REACH DO NOT LOVE YOU. PLEASE HANG UP." (that test chamber took me FOREVER to figure out and when I finally heard that line I laughed so freakin hard.) But I also love GLaDOS's activation scene in Portal 2 because it's SO GOOD. Like, it really shows how terrifying she is and is a fantastic re-introduciton to her. Also you can see some really subtle facial expressions with the way she's animated and it's so good. Gosh I love it.
Idea for a story: I have written so many Portal fanfics and a lot of them involve her. I do have like, one fic idea that was a collab with Jaywings? IIRC the first chapter or two was written. If I'm ever in a Portal mood again it might be fun to go back to that. Or maybe back to my crow!Wheatley game--she was involved in that, albeit not as a main character.
Unpopular opinion: I know a lot of people interpret GLaDOS as a lesbian, but to me... GLaDOS aroace. she got that from Caroline. like, legit, when I first played the game and heard Cave describe Caroline as being "married to Science" my IMMEDIATE thought was "oh! she's aromantic!" and then that thought transferred to GLaDOS when I realized they were connected. I remember it made me really happy thinking about Caroline being aro and the thought of GLaDOS also being aroace also makes me happy.
Favorite relationship: Do I have to say it?? CHELL! I love seeing her interact with Chell! I love the complex relationship they share, how GLaDOS has this mix of respect for but also near-superstitious fear of her, and how they team up in the latter third of the game. I kinda wish we could see Chell's side of it, but it's fun to theorize and explore in fanfic, haha. And of course, next to that, I do like her relationship with Wheatley and cores in general, since they're constructs made with the sole purpose of taming her, so of course she just loathes them with every fiber of her being. It's kindof interesting to explore in fanfic. Honorable mentions goes to her relationship with Atlas and P-body because it's hilarious, and also her relationship with her "little killers" (which GOSH VALVE PLEASE SHOW US MORE OF THIS??? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE REST OF THE DLC CAMPAIGNS?? WHY WAS THERE ONLY ONNNNNEEE)
Favorite headcanon: Also a somewhat unpopular one, but my headcanon is that GLaDOS and Caroline are separate entities. Which isn't to say that Caroline was some innocent woman caught up in this--what was done to her was horrible, but also she was a genuinely awful person, which is why GLaDOS wound up so awful. But some point in her confinement, Caroline reconsidered her actions and attempted to act as a conscience for GLaDOS--at least, that's my interpretation of GLaDOS's speech about when she hears "her own" voice in her head. I know a lot of people see them as separate, but this is my interpretation.
Wow, been a while since I've talked about Portal stuff...
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s1utspeare · 3 years
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Writing Tag Game
Once again, @hils79 is coming through and giving me reasons to live every day. I love u hilsy :')
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
18 lol
2. What is your total AO3 word count?
209,037
3. Top five fics by kudos
A Swiftly Tilting Planet - 228
i wish that you would love me - 133
cause it's easier to bury my head in the sand sometimes - 131
the play's the thing - 114
falling backwards, falling backwards - 103
4. Do you respond to comments, and why?
I like to!! Partially because I love talking about my work with people, and I love seeing what they've gotten out of it, and partially because i'm always so excited when people comment so it's like "!!!!!!!!"
5. What’s the fic you have written with the angstiest ending?
uhhhhh wow idk. ummmm the first fic i ever published, way back in like, 2012, was a Major Character Death ending... Precursor in the Trollhunters fandom is fairly bittersweet... idk most people like angst with a happy ending (including me) so I try not to end things on a down note. There's enough of that in the world. for recent fics, I guess falling backwards, falling backwards OH WAIT SHIT i completely forgot about can't be bothered by the teachers. nevermind, THAT one is the angstiest
6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
the play's the thing! that one was just very cute and very fluffy so of course it had a happy ending ^.^
7. Do you write crossovers, if so what’s the craziest one you have done?
I've only ever done crossovers as crack fic, but i was.............. uh definitely very weird in middle school so there's some out there.
8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?
Not really lol. There were a couple of critiques on some things back on ff.net, but they weren't even really hate, just things that I was like >:/ about bc i was like. twelve.
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
I didn't, and I never thought I would, but then I started writing smut for like, my professional job, and idk I just think it's really interesting??? it's something i haven't ever really tried so when I'm looking for a way to stretch my writing muscles and experiment I do some smut lol. I'm actually really proud of my chen pi/er-ye/yatou smut and i'm not entirely sure why??? probably just bc I wrote it which means i'm growing as a writer asighafjalfjg. who would've thought.
10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Nope! I'm not sure if that's bc I've never been in a big-enough fandom, or if everyone I've ever come across is just really nice! My style is also pretty distinctive, so that could be a turn away from stealing lol
11. Have you ever had a fic translated?
I don't think so! That would be so cool though!
12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Back on ffnet, yeah. They were all very 2012. And bad.
13. All time favorite ship!
I DON'T KNOOOOWWWWWW like my favorite ship (Wangxian) i haven't written yet, but my favorite ship to write has probably been Iron Threesome (have i even actually written them???? outside of pingpangsangxie?? i can't remember. Anyway).
14.What’s a WIP that you want to finish, but don’t think you will?
I have no idea? Like, I have every intention of finishing every WIP I have started rn... if it's not something I'm completely into, I just don't start it lmao. I want them all to be DONE but i don't have TIME lol. Uhhhh there's a dmbj kpop au that i have outlined but probably won't ever write bc there's a lot more plot than I think I have the patience to put into a piece that's essentially just "zhang rishan angst modern au"
15. What are your writing strengths?
Uhhhhhhhhh language use, probably. @xcziel said something recently about how my writing reads like it's lined in gold (and I nearly cried about it), and I definitely write as though things are going to be read aloud, so I like to pay attention to how rhythm and sounds and sentences flow. Also DIALOGGGUUUEEE see this is all because i'm a playwright alsidghasdfkjas
16. What are your writing weaknesses?
i go too fast :/ i feel like if i took some more time on things i could really up the quality of some of it but i get too excited and just want to get it OUT so i end up making tiny mistakes and then have to do more work correcting them, but if i had just been slightly more patient I could have avoided it in the first place lol
17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?
I think that you should stick to languages you're fluent in, unless you have a professional translator. I also don't believe in making words in other (real) languages italicized, because that sort of emphasizes the "otherness" of a different language, and that's not a good thing. THAT BEING SAID i fucking love making up languages; I don't have any fully developed ones, but all of my fantasy worlds usually have made-up swear words lmao
18. First fandom you wrote for?
Percy Jackson adsighasdljalsdfjad. That was a while ago.
19. Fave fic you have written?
OOOoohhhhh, shit. Uh. I don't know if I have favorites, I just have things that I'm proud of for like, each fic? Like I really like At the Beginning of the End of the World because that one was written in second person, which was a fun challenge, as well as for a fandom that I'm not in (Deltarune) because it was a charity commission request, so I had to do a lot of research and stuff to figure out what was going on there. A Swiftly Tilting Planet is super fun and super interesting to me, and I'm really excited for the rest of the trilogy that I have planned, but there's also a LOT of stuff I kind of wish I could change about that one (mainly because I've read it over like 78 times and found all the small mistakes lmao). I'm also super proud of i wish that you would love me because i think I really doubled-down on the language strengths in that one, and the amount of people that fic resonated with is very important to me, because I'm one of them. So there's a lot of different things that I like about each fic I've written, and I like them all!
THIS WAS SO FUN THANK YOU HILSY i'm gonna tag @daydreamorama, @mejomonster, @jockvillagersonly, @bookjoyworm, and @pissmeoffanddie, as well as anyone who would like to TAG STEAL >:)
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metalbvcky · 4 years
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Back in May, I made my first Stucky Ficrec post and months later, I’ve decided to make another since this fandom is hella talented. There’s a little over two dozen fics down below ranging from 10k-100k+ and everything’s categorized.
Do note that lot of these are Modern AU’s (I love those) and most of them are smutty. (yes hello, an asexual here who enjoys smut so very much) Also heed the tags once you click the link(s). Other than that, enjoy!!!
Key:  ♥ = My personal favorites, S = Smut, DS = Dom/Sub
a) CANON UNIVERSE
If You're Reading This, Steve Rogers by fallendarlings Words: 39,273 | Post/Canon Divergence 2012 Avengers/TWS, Recovery, Slow Burn
Nobody tells Steve it's okay to cry.
Nobody touches him.
Nobody remembers Steve Rogers is a person under the mantle. It's okay. He hasn't felt like a person since he watched Bucky fall.
don't threaten me with a good time ♥ by canistakahari - Words 10,106 | Post-TWS, Sick!Fic, Sick!Bucky, Cabin Fic
Steve's taken him on vacation to a cabin in Canada in the middle of winter, so it's obviously the perfect time for his body to go haywire. Bucky is determined to stick it out, though, partly because he's a stubborn bastard, but mostly because he feels some kinda way about Steve.
Higher Ground by EmilianaDarling - Words: 13,002 | Post-TWS, S, DS (undertones), Top!Bucky, Bottom!Steve
“S’okay,” Bucky murmurs quietly, and Steve sucks in a sharp breath at the brush of Bucky’s lips against his ear, his breath hot against the side of Steve’s neck. There’s a hint of a grin in Bucky’s voice; amused affection and confidence and something heated beneath it all, a familiar tone from so long ago that makes Steve’s heart clench and his cock twitch helplessly in his jeans.
“S’okay, Stevie,” he says again, and Steve can feel the curl of Bucky’s lips against his throat when he smiles. His metal thumb is rubbing circles on Steve’s shoulder. “M’gonna take care of you.”
A year and a half after the events of The Winter Soldier, Steve's been acting recklessly. Bucky deals with it as best he can.
The Simple Life ♥ from The Simple Life Series by howler32557038 - Words: 114,329 (Series Total: 337,273 + ongoing) | Canon Universe, MPreg, Top!Steve, Bottom!Bucky
"The simple life."
"You'll get there one day."
"I don't know. Family, stability...The guy who wanted all that went in the ice seventy-five years ago. I think someone else came out."
Bucky wants to be part of Steve's life. He wants to be an Avenger. He wants to be a good partner. Unfortunately, sometimes that means not telling Steve everything.
a road less traveled by Claudia_flies, cyclamental art (cyclamental),maichan, zilia - Words: 75,396 | 2012 Timeline AU, Post-Avengers 2012 (Endgame Divergence), Domestic Avengers, Recovering!Bucky
Steve wakes up on the cold stone floor of the foyer. He scrambles up; there’s glass shards everywhere and they crunch under his gloved hands. People are staring, holding themselves back. They must have seen the fight, must have seen two of him.
His own voice rings in his head.
“Bucky is alive!”
Kept Safe by Whendoestheshipsail (restricted to AO3 users only) - Words: 54,419 | S, DS, BDSM
Steve and Bucky are friends. Best Friends. If asked, Bucky would say he knows absolutely everything about Steve. Except when it comes to sex. Steve lives such a monastic existence that Bucky doesn't know if he likes girls, boys, or none of the above. For all he knows, Steve may have no interest in sex whatsoever.
But then a mission goes wrong, Steve is bleeding out from a wound to the femoral artery and Bucky is trying to stop the bleeding when his hand brushes against metal. Where there most definitely shouldn't be metal. Or a padlock. And most definitely not a torturously small cage.
48 hours by Whendoestheshipsail (restricted to AO3 users only) - Words: 25,894 | Post-CW, S, DS, Top!Bucky, Bottom!Steve
Steve is keeping it together. No one would say he's keeping it together well, but he's getting by. Mission after mission, he goes back to his apartment in Wakanda and breaks down. Then he watches Bucky sleep and tries to not notice how everyone looks at him like he's the saddest bastard that ever lived.
But, this time is different. This time, Steve goes back to his apartment post-mission and Bucky is awake, out of cryo and making them dinner in Steve's kitchen. The breakdown is still happening. Bucky isn't pleased, but he does have a plan. For 48 hours after every mission, Steve is going to let Bucky take care of him or he's going to be on Steve's next mission. He can't risk losing Bucky again. Which should make the decision simple.
It isn't simple.
The Sex Therapist ♥ by Whendoestheshipsail (restricted to AO3 users only) - Words: 179,941 | S, DS, DKink, Top!Bucky, Bottom!Steve, Current/Past Steve/Sharon
Sharon has given him an ultimatum- either go to sex therapy or it's over. Sex therapy sounds like normal therapy but more humiliating and expensive. It's total BS. He will go because she's making him, but he will also make everyone's lives miserable (Yeah, including his own) and never return again.
Do they have a lot of sex? No. Does Sharon want more sex? Yes. Does Steve do his best? Yeah, actually, he does. He can get it up, he just needs time. Alone. There's... preparation involved. It's not like one just 'is' aroused.
He can't explain it. And he won't. He definitely won't tell Bucky what exactly he thinks about to get worked up enough to screw his girlfriend.
Found My Place in Time - Cap_D, humapuma - Words: 12,492 | Post-EG (Divergence, duh) S, Fluff, Top!Steve, Bottom!Bucky
“Buck,” he heard Steve say, “wake up. We’re here.” Bucky opened his eyes and rolled his shoulders, trying to ease some of the tension out of his back. When Steve’s words sunk in, though, he turned and leaned forward, staring past Steve’s chest to look out the window. Beyond the wing of the plane, he found a beautiful coastline with white sand, blue waters, and palm trees, as well as rows of bungalows on the water. “Wow,” he murmured. “We’re staying in one of those, right?”
In which Steve invites Bucky on a trip to Fiji and they discover something a lot more than beautiful vistas and friendly locals.
Total Institution ♥ from the Institutions of Love and Incarceration series by thelittlestpurplecat - Words: 94,303 | Canon Universe AU, Prison!AU, Guard!Steve, Prisoner!Bucky, Unrequited Love, Slow Burn, WS Trial
The Winter Soldier has been sentenced to life without parol. His entire world had been condensed to a hot, cramped cell that he hasn't seen the outside of in the four years since his apprehension. It's hell. He has no means of escape, no means of terminating his suffering, and no means of distraction...that is, until he's assigned a new guard. Steve Rogers is assigned the Winter Soldier as his singular charge. He expects a sadistic, violent murderer. What he finds instead is a broken, tormented man with no memory of his past life, and no control over what had been done to him. He's a victim. Not a monster. And Steve won't stand to see him pay for crimes over which he had no control.
Raise Your Glass by minkeys - Words: 10,008 | Top!Bucky, Bottom!Steve, Light DS, S, DKink
Bucky knows Steve in ways that his 21st century friends could never even begin to imagine. Or at least, they couldn't until tonight. It's about time somebody corrected all those historians that painted Steve as a straight-laced, God-fearing soldier, and what better way to do it than over a harmless game of "Never Have I Ever." What's the worst that could be said?
b) SHRUNKYCLUNKS
Waking Up Slow ♥ by odetteandodile - Words: 44,638 | Dad!Bucky, Kid!Fic, Hurt/Comfort
In 1945 Steve Rogers crashed the Valkyrie into the Arctic Ocean and was never recovered.
In 2019 Bucky Barnes is walking along the beach below the decommissioned lighthouse where he lives with his sixteen month old daughter when he finds the body of a man washed up in the surf, half frozen but miraculously alive.
Bucky manages to revive him, but finds that the stranger has no memory of who he is or how he got here aside from a name: Steve. Snowed in by a blizzard soon after and unable to get Steve a medevac, Bucky discovers that the funny, good-hearted man slips into the fabric of his and Alice’s life faster than he would have thought possible. The two are undeniably drawn to each other, but as their feelings grow so does the looming possibility that the answer to the question “who is Steve?” might be much more complicated than either of them realized.
Isn't It Ironic? (Don't You Think?) ♥ by HeyBoy, Huntress79, imhereforgaysuperheroes - Words: 33,342 |  Jewish, Dad!Bucky, Kid!Fic
Bucky is used to his daughter bursting into tears in the middle of department stores. What he isn't used to is someone braving the wails and actually being able to stop Becca's tantrum in its tracks. Oh, and he's also not used to that someone being Captain America.
AKA, how Steve Rogers calms a screaming kid in Target and falls in love with two more Barneses than he had bargained for.
in my condition love's the best physician by aniloquent - Words: 9,177 | Pharmacy!AU, Russian!Bucky
“This situation is a little more delicate because I don't even know if he speaks English and I'm tired of going down to the pharmacy for constipation medication and allergy pills when I haven't sneezed since 1941.” Steve shouts.
The room falls silent, and he turns back around to find four pairs of stunned eyes watching him.
Tony, as always, speaks first. “He?”
Or the one where Bucky is a hot pharmacist and Steve keeps making up bullshit reasons to go see him.
c) MODERN AU
Home Is Wherever I'm With You ♥ by cydonic  - Words: 88,570 | Neighbors!AU, Slow Burn, Parent!Steve, Kid!Fic
This is what happens when you buy a house to flip having only seen the online images: you get more than you bargained for. Bucky Barnes brings all the tools to handle a dilapidated home, but he's hardly prepared for a smart-mouthed child (with poor aim), a crying baby, and the hottest dad he's ever seen in his life living right next door.
That House-Flipper!AU.
if only you could see me (for the pie that i am) ♥ by bitelikefire (theoleo) | Words: 35,121 | Baker!Steve, WeddingPlanner!Bucky
In which Steve is the proud owner of Frost; a semi famous local bakery in D.C. And despite the overwhelming insistence that it’s about time he start dating, Steve swears up and down he isn’t ready for that.
Or as of recently, just doesn’t have the time because of Mr. Barnes. The highly demanding wedding planner on the phone who keeps asking for nearly impossible deliveries and maybe Steve would like to personally strangle him. Maybe.
(There is pie. And misunderstandings. But a lot more desserts and eye rolls.)
So Alive ♥ from the Brooklyn Heights Books Series by GottaSaveBucky (Cosmic_Entity_1of4) - Words: 109,074 (Series Total: 165,440 + ongoing) | Bookstore!AU (sort of), Top!Steve, Bottom!Bucky, DKink
A man wearing a light denim jacket over a dark blue shirt came into the shop, a box tucked under his right arm. Despite it being late afternoon, he was wearing sunglasses with bright blue lenses, and his long, dark hair was pulled back in a messy little bun. A few strands had escaped, framing his strong, unshaven jawline. The man looked into the café, smiled widely, and waved in Clint’s direction as he kept walking into the bookstore, and Steve’s mouth went completely dry.
Beautiful, was the only word to describe that smile; straight, white teeth framed by full, lush, red lips, bracketed by laugh lines and an adorable dimple in his right cheek, a charming little chin cleft just visible under the light stubble—Steve was struck literally speechless. And that was before he got a glimpse of the man’s backside. Slim hips and a round, firm-looking ass led to long, lean legs that were encased in snug, dark blue jeans.
“Guh,” Steve said, watching the dark-haired man continue on to the back of the store.
The Penthouse Suite ♥ by elle1991 - Words: 15,873 | S, DS, BSDM, Top!Steve, Bottom!Bucky, Happy Ending
Bucky Barnes has the chance to earn $5,000 in one night. All he has to do is go to the penthouse suite of a luxury hotel and spend the night with his client, one enigmatic Steve Rogers.
The catch? Steve is a massive pervert, intent on using this one night to satisfy every single one of his many debauched kinks.
Even ignoring the big box of sex toys on the bed, Bucky should have known he was in trouble the moment Steve opened his mouth and said his first words: "My name is Steve Rogers, but you can call me Sir..."
Burnin' For You by GoldBlooded - Words: 15,753 | Firefighter!Steve, Detective!Bucky, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Top!Steve, Bottom!Bucky
Steve Rogers is Fire Captain of Brooklyn’s very busy Station 118. He wants three things out of life: People he can count on, for everyone to get through their shifts safe and sound, and for Sergeant James Barnes to get the hell off of his arson scene.
James Barnes is Detective Sergeant of Brooklyn’s very busy 107th Precinct. He wants three things out of life: A decent cup of coffee, good leads to chase, and for Captain Steven Rogers to get the hell off of his arson scene.
Everyone knows to steer clear when these two have to deal with each other. Everyone knows about their mutual dislike and sometimes hatred. But what everyone doesn't know? How they got to be like that in the first place.
Collar Full of Chemistry ♥ from the Rich People Are Wild Series by 2bestfriends - Words: 188,437 (Series Total: 219,519) | Heavy BDSM, DS, S, Top!Steve, Bottom!Bucky
Steve is very rich and desperate to feel in control of his life again after a recent divorce has left him feeling bitter and lonely. When he keeps crossing paths with a disaster twenty-something, an unconventional solution presents itself. Steve's always been one for following his instincts.
Bucky is very broke and can't seem to catch a break, especially after some asshole fires him for one fucking mistake. So of course, it follows that he should sign a contract agreeing to do everything and anything that same asshole wants for a whole year in exchange for a payout that could finally change his life for the better.
Toothpaste Kisses ♥ by buckybees - Words: 18,736 | Dentist!Steve, Patient!Bucky, Amputee!Bucky
Sitting in the horribly antiseptic gateway to hell, otherwise known as the waiting room, Bucky was deeply reassessing his life choices. Maybe if he didn’t eat ice cream for every meal this wouldn’t have happened.
Steve's a dentist, Bucky's a patient. You know the drill.
Out of the Blue ♥ by IsabellaJack - Words: 37,564 | PreSerum!Steve, Detective!Bucky (and Sam!), Mystery!Fic
“Does she have family?” Barnes asks again.
Steve tries to remember. “I don’t know.”
“You sing her praises and don’t know a simple info like that?” Barnes huffs, looking irritated.
Love Is An Ocean Wide by fancyh - Words: 29,009 | Shapeshifter!AU, Orca!Bucky, Marine Biologist!Steve
When marine biologist Steve Rogers helps to rescue an injured orca from the marine traffickers Hydra, he has no idea how his life will change. Once rehabilitated, the orca is released and disappears, and a despondent Steve throws himself into his work, only to feel a spark when a new volunteer arrives, a man with one arm and curiously familiar blue eyes.
Bucky has lived in the ocean his whole life. But when his family is killed and his sister captured by Hydra, he is forced to turn to humans for help. One human in particular intrigues him, a man by the name of Steve. As Bucky comes ashore to search for his sister, he finds himself falling for the man, but dangerous secrets still stand between them.
Includes clueless-about-humans Bucky, heart-eyes-Steve, and lots of Very Important rocks.
Innocent Until ♥ by L1av - Words: 136,866 | Lawyer!Bucky, Defendant!Steve, DS, BDSM, Top!Bucky, Bottom!Steve
Bucky Barnes made a name for himself as the attorney who could get anyone off, but he still lives by the saying, "Innocent until proven guilty." Steve Rogers finds himself on trial for multiple homicides but he swears he was only trying to protect a girl. Bucky's been in this business long enough to know when someone's innocent, and Steve is innocent. Steve already feels like a monster and Bucky's worried this guy's going to lay himself on the sword come his trial. So Bucky offers up another course for punishment:
Turns out, chains and whips really excite Steve.
Brooklyn Syndrome ♥ by lordelannette - Words: 158,350 | DARKFIC, Dark!Steve (VERY DARK, heed the tags, you have been warned) Doctor!Steve, Writer!Bucky, Kidnapping, Slow Burn, Graphic Violence
Bucky's back was pressed against the cold floor and he stared through blurry eyes as Steve stood over him. He was trying to push himself as far away as he could, using his hands and bare feet to slide himself out from between Steve's legs but he couldn't find purchase against the wooden floor. Steve's legs were locked on both sides of his hips and Bucky couldn't move, couldn't get away, and the room was swimming before his eyes and he couldn't focus, couldn't think straight. All he could make out was the hazy figure of Steve towering over him and he lifted his arm to push uselessly at Steve's shin.
"P-please," Bucky whispered. His voice was weak, like him, and his jaw trembled as Steve reached down.
Steve slid down onto the floor and effortlessly gathered him into his strong arms, cradling Bucky to his chest as he leaned against the wall. "Bucky," Steve breathed. One of his large hands slid gently into Bucky's hair, the other curving against his spine and pulling him even closer. "You're mine now, remember?"
Steve's grip tightened then it all went black.
lay me down (tell me i've been found) by coffeeinallcaps - Words: 25,188 | Modern!AU, DS, Top!Steve, Bottom!Bucky
The collar is a little on the heavy side, and incredibly soft against Bucky's skin. Even softer than he thought it would be. It seems to fit snugly, and for a second he feels like he can't breathe. Then, Steve slides two fingers under the collar and runs them along the inside, almost all the way around. Bucky shivers. Goose bumps spread down his back, his arms. "How does it feel?" Steve murmurs, hooking his fingers into the ring and giving a gentle tug on it. Bucky swallows. Nods.
(In which billionaire businessman Steve shows up and turns Bucky's life into an improbable fantasy.)
All Those Things You've Always Pined For by LavenderProse - Words: 92,142 | Family Man (2000) aka the Nicholas Cage movie AU, Domestic, Kid!Fic, PreSerum!Steve
“Steve Rogers. I haven’t thought about him in…God, at least ten years. Probably longer." “Who is he?” Sharon asks, and perches on the corner of his desk, hands folded in her lap. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Bucky clears his throat, tosses the sticky note onto the desk. “Steve was…my college boyfriend. We almost got married.”
It's been fifteen years since Bucky Barnes left Steve Rogers standing in a New York airport and never saw him again. Those fifteen years have brought him wealth and stability; everything his lower middle class Brooklyn upbringing had not provided. He is happy. He doesn't want for anything. He doesn't need anything. That's about to change.
Karma's A Fake Orgasm ♥ by daisymondays - Words: 51,637 | College!AU, Friends to Lovers, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Humor, Slow Burn
There’s another abandoned mug, festering with mould in the living room — Steve offically has the world's worst roommates. And complains about them. Often. Bucky, tired of his lack of action, decides it’s time to avenge Steve's sleepless nights and unsanitary conditions once and for all. They’ll pretend to be the world’s most annoying couple: excessive PDA, loud fake sex, and general repugnance. The plan sounds easy enough; it will be strictly platonic. Or will it?
I'll Be Your Shield by 17 pansies (17pansies) - Words: 23,332 | Bodyguard!Steve, Rich!Bucky, Top!Steve, Bottom!Bucky
"If he's just minor nobility, why does he need a bodyguard?" Steve shoved the folder which held Barnes' details towards the middle of the table. "He's not exactly prime kidnap material."
"His parents aren't worried about kidnapping," Fury said. "They need someone to steer him away from the dumb ass situations he keeps getting into."
"You mean he needs a babysitter." Steve sat back and folded his arms. "Seriously."
I think this is a pretty diverse list :) There’s a good sample of everything here, some old fashioned post TWS recovery fics, some good dom steve/bucky, slow burns, fake pretend relationships and so forth!
PS: I’m on AO3 with more bookmarks plus my own hurt/comfort fics if anyone is interested :P
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interstellarflowers · 3 years
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Professor Parker Ch. 1| Professor, Peter Parker x Student, Reader
a/n this fic doesn’t follow the marvel cinematic universe but assume that peter has been what he’s been through with the exception that tony lived, and bruce is still bruce, sorry but i just can't deal with endgame hulk/bruce rn emotionally or mentally. im sorry nat is still dead but dw i'll actually treat it with respect unlike endgame like goddamn where was her funeral, am i right? the stages of grief thing they did was interesting though. im sorry i digress, this is set in nyc (because heyo im a new yorka) and the avengers/stark tower is still a thing, peter is fucking traumatized and has turned kind of cold as a result. this fic may contain a smut chapter in the future? not sure yet, where this fic goes depends on the feedback, thanks for reading also sorry im not the proudest of this first chapter so ill probably edit it but promise itll only improve from here just not in the best mental state rn
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University life wasn’t exactly everything that you imagined it to be. There was hardly time to do anything that people claimed was good about coming to university. The parties, the epic heartbreaks, and romances, they were just nowhere to be seen. In fact, there was nothing particularly extravagant about your experience thus far. You went to class, studied, and went to your internship. Your internship was probably the most exciting thing about your life at the moment, you were lucky to be accepted into the Stark Industries student internship, the company paid college tuition and only required around twenty hours of lab work a week, you couldn’t complain. Of course, the exciting part of the whole ordeal was the name attached to it, “Stark,” not that you had ever met him, but it was nice to have a unique feature like that in such an impressive student body.
So here you were on the first day of your third year of university. You lived off-campus, about a five-minute walk from the Stark Tower, but a twenty-minute subway ride to your campus. However, having an 882 square foot space to yourself was really nothing you could truly complain about despite the distance. The studio apartment being yet another benefit reaped from Stark Industries. Thank you Tony Stark, the unseen benevolent God in your life.
Typically you would start your mornings off quietly and in no rush, a shower, a cup of coffee, maybe some studying before heading off to your campus, but your phone had other plans for you today. Instead of your alarm going off like it was supposed to, you were woken up by the sound of a particularly loud car horn, and oh how grateful you were for that. As soon as you were jolted awake you shifted to grab your phone and turned it over to see an alarming 8:40am glaring back at you.
Holy shit. You were late.
You scrambled out of bed nearly face planting several times in your hurry to get dressed and only barely ran out the door with everything you needed at 8:47am.
By the time you managed to get to the subway and clamor onto the right train it was already 8:55am. Out of breath and panicking, you considered your options. You could explain after class, you could shoot an email, there were a plethora of things you could do but none of them seemed to justify being late as a third-year to a level 500 class. You had googled all of your professors while registering for classes as was common practice. You couldn’t find a RateMyProfessor on Professor...Parker? You were pretty sure it was Professor Parker, but you do remember seeing on the STEM department page that he was currently a Ph.D. student, so you could only hope that as a fellow student he would be at least a little understanding towards your lateness.
You stood outside of the lecture hall huffing and trying to catch your breath at 9:32am, psyching yourself up, you pushed open the door to the class and attempted to go unnoticed. The class was in a lecture hall despite being only composed of around thirty students, so if you were lucky maybe nobody would even see-
“Ms.(y/l/n), I presume?.” Shit.
“Professor Parker?” Shit.
“You are aware that class starts at 9am, and not 9:30am, would this be correct Ms.(y/l/n)?”
“Yes, Professor, it’s just that I had an emergency.” The lying route. Not exactly the highlight of your academic career.
“I regret to inform you that I only take valid excuses Ms.(y/l/n), please take a seat, and next time, don’t bother disrupting class halfway through the lesson.” Fuck. You mustered a quiet “ok,” and a small nod before escorting yourself to the back of the room, thirty-something eyes following you until you sat down.
You couldn’t focus for the rest of the class, it was just too embarrassing, time moved forward but you couldn’t help but be stuck on what had just happened. For the first ten minutes after sitting down you felt like dropping out of the whole class out of sheer fucking humiliation. This was of course before you reminded yourself that this class was a requirement to graduate in your field of study. You quietly bargained with yourself before sighing quietly and settling on the conclusion that Professor Parker was just a dick. A dick who certainly didn’t deserve the satisfaction of you switching out of his class. If he wanted to be like that, you decided, you would simply return the favor.
“I know, Ms.(y/ln), why don’t you tell us DeBroglie’s equation?”
“With pleasure, Professor Parker.” Yeah, you’d return the favor alright.
“Ms.(y/l/n), you stay.” Fuck that. You looked the other way and feigned ignorance as you kept making your way towards the door. About to leave, the door shut on your face.
“What the fuck!” You jumped before turning around and you felt your face heat up.
“Ms.(y/l/n), please refrain from using profanities in my classroom.”
“I’m sorry Professor Parker. I was just startled.”
“Mhm,” he took his glasses off and laid them on his desk, “Just don’t do it in the future Ms.(y/l/n).”
“Of course. My name is (y/n), by the way, Professor Parker, you can just call me that, actually, I prefer that people refer to me by (y/n).”
“Rest assured, I’m aware of your name, Ms.(y/l/n). My name is Peter, but you can continue to call me Professor Parker.” You could have sworn that you saw a ghost of a smirk on his lips. He knew what he was fucking doing, asshole. You held back from rolling your eyes into the back of your head.
“Of course, Professor Parker.”
“As you know, Ms.(y/l/n), I did request that you stay after class.”
“Oh? I sincerely apologize Professor Parker, I really didn’t hear you.”
“I’m sure, Ms.(y/l/n).” Fucking. Dick.
“Well, what exactly did you want Professor Parker? I do have another class soon.” Professor Parker narrowed his eyes at you in obvious distaste before reaching behind himself into a bin underneath his desk and pulling out a stack of papers,
“These are the handouts you missed from the beginning of the class. Textbook requirements, syllabus...Crucial information to have if you care to succeed in my class Ms.(y/l/n).” So coldly, so maliciously, Professor Parker placed the stack into your arms.
“I take my work very seriously, Ms.(y/l/n), I do my part as your professor so I only have the simple request that my students do the same.” You nodded feeling your face heat up again.
“Of course, Professor Parker, it won’t happen again,” you said with a tightlipped smile.
“Mhm,” Professor Parker turned around and began shuffling around some paper and without giving you a second glance said, “You are dismissed.” You nodded and hurriedly made your way out of his classroom. Of course, you had lied. You didn’t have another class until late in the afternoon. So you called your coworker instead,
“Hey, Harvey.”
“(y/n).”
“Wow, okay, don’t get too excited.”
“Sorry, just woke up.”
“Tsk, the early bird gets the worm, Harvey.”
“I don’t want a worm.”
“Fuck you. I’m headed to the lab, can I expect you?”
“Yeah, yeah.” You had been working with Harvey for around four years now, he was quite the impressive specimen, having attended MIT and graduating Summa Cum Laude at age 20 was no easy feat, he was closer to Tony Stark than you would ever get, he was quite personable, and you couldn’t deny that he was quite good looking. You’d never tell him that though, he didn’t need another ego boost. Besides, you had some connections of your own.
“Hey, (y/n).”
“Banner!”
“Can we expect Harvey today?”
“Honestly, not sure.” You both knowingly smiled at each other before you made your way over to what he was working on,
“Do you ever get bored here?”
“With you and the other idiot always running around? How could I?” You laughed,
“No, seriously, like wouldn’t you rather be doing nerd shit with Tony or something? Isn’t it a little tiresome babysitting us?”
“Tiring? Maybe sometimes, but not nearly as tiring as doing ‘nerd shit’ with Tony. He’s exhausting,” Bruce smiled at his own joke, “I don’t mind playing babysitter at all kid.” He fiddled with the handle of a mug that read, “Don’t be so Na Cl,” which you had gotten him a year back as a joke, but he still used it.
You really loved Bruce for all he was. Since losing your family back in 2012 during the battle in NYC, you didn’t really have any familial figures. But since landing this internship you found yourself with a parental figure again, and you would never be able to put into words how much it meant to you, so you didn’t. Besides, you didn’t want him to feel pressured about it, especially after everything he had been through himself. Frying half your body and losing the love of your life in such a short span of time was really nothing less than horrifying. Yet, here he was, smiling, laughing...You loved him for it.
“First day of junior year? How was that?”
“Shit.”
“Huh?” Bruce stopped tinkering with the device in his hands and looked over at you, “I’ve never heard of a course being too hard for (y/n) (y/l/n), what is it? Aerospace? Quantum?”
“No, just one giant dick.”
“Pardon-”
“My professor, he’s a fucking asshole.”
“Ah, I see. If he’s really harassing you (y/n), I don’t mean to overstep, I really think we should alert administration, what’s his name?” Bruce took a sip of his coffee.
“Professor Parker,” Bruce choked on his coffee, “Oh my God, Bruce, are you okay?”
“Yeah-” he said, still coughing, “Just a little too strong.”
“Okay, are you sure?”
“Yeah, yeah,” Bruce caught his breath, “What did he do kid?”
“He’s just a dick that’s all.”
“You sure you don’t want me to do something about it?”
“Yeah, it’s fine, I don’t know what you could do anyways. Thank you though.”
“Actually, you’d be surprised.”
Sitting at your desk stressing over school work at 3am, it was nothing out of the ordinary for you. Everything appeared ordinary. The ordinary cup of tea, the familiar glow of your computer, and a morning chill creeping through your window. It was all so breathtakingly normal until there was a rap on your window. You took an earbud out of your ear, certain you were just hearing things, you looked to your window. Holy shit.
You opened your window wide so that he could crawl in.
“(y/n)?”
“Mr.Spiderman.” Still too in shock to fully process the situation you started to take in the scene in front of you,
“Please, it’s just Spiderman.”
“Oh-Oh my God, what happened?” Head to toe the suit seemed to have blood seeping through, tears in the body of the suit revealed gashes and a bullet wound.
“Bad guys. I know this guy-said he knew a medical student close by, you are (y/n)? Right?”
“Y-Yeah, but I’m really just a student, I’m not really a prof-”
“This guy, he said you might as well be.”
“I don’t know Mr.Spiderman, really, maybe I could take you to the hospital though.”
“-Spiderman, it’s just Spiderman, listen, (y/n), you know I can’t go to a hospital, it would ruin this whole secret identity thing I got going on here, and this guy, he’s probably the smartest guy I know, so if he says you can handle it, you can.” You swallowed and nodded,
“Yeah-” you wring your hands together, “Yeah-Sorry, let me go get my first aid kit.”
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spectralarchers · 3 years
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Wow, what a ride it’s been, right? 
I can’t believe I joined tumblr on March 27th, 2011. It feels like it’s a life-time ago. I remember the day I joined very, very vividly (it’s not even a joke, it was 2 am, I had been chatting online with some friends and one of them kept mentioning Tumblr, so I decided to join!)!
But, looking back, what a ride it’s been! 
When I joined, I hadn’t finished high school yet had just turned 18 years old, and I was still unsure of what I wanted to do with my life. Today, I have a full-time job, a driver’s license, a Bachelor of Arts and a Master of Arts degrees, and I live in a whole other country.
In the time in between, I’ve met some absolutely amazing people on this website who make up such a large part of my day to day life that I don’t even know how I’d have been as a person without them - you guys know who you are, and some of you aren’t even on Tumblr anymore, but I won’t ever forget you!
It’s been a personal journey - going from being unaware of the different LGBTQIA+ orientations (and answering “straight” to those tag games) to figuring out I’m ace, to embracing it and finding a significant other (who also happens to be on Tumblr!). 
It’s been a Fandom journey - without Tumblr I wouldn’t have joined a whole bunch of fandoms and gone through developments that go with it: learning Photoshop to make gifs, perfecting written English to write fics, traveling abroad to meet friends and for Comic Cons (I’ve traveled to Australia, Poland, Sweden, Canada, the United States, Germany and the United Kingdom to meet Tumblr friends and some of  you have traveled either to France or Denmark, depending on when you visited me!).
It’s been some incredible experiences - using Hailee Steinfeld as Katie Kate since 2014 only for her to be on the set of an actual Hawkeye television show all those years later still feels absolutely mind-blowing, but so was being in SDCC in 2019 and seeing Phase 4 revealed along with all of you guys who followed from home or online. 
It was all the madness that was Superwholock (and what a time to be alive!), of Bondlock and of Skyfall’s release, the 2012 Summer Olympics, CATWS, of nerding out over a tiny BBC audio show (I actually even got John Finnemore to write Fizz Buzz in his handwriting to get it as a tattoo, way back in the day!), it’s been growing and learning and becoming a more responsible person.
It’s through fandom that I’ve grown most, through the guidance of so many of you (many of you I consider my surrogate moms and aunts and parents, by the way!) and I don’t think I’ll ever let go of this hellsite, because it’s just too good to let go of. 
I love you all, and I hope we’ll all still be here in 10 years’ time <3
- Christine
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bellamioneotp · 4 years
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Bellamione Fic Master List
Making a list of Bellamione fics to guide the poor innocent souls into temptation organize stories based on AU type. 
DARK AU’s
Bellatrix isn’t a bright ball of sunshine, but rather than have a story where she becomes a better person, Hermione becomes like her, or even joins her side. This AU type isn’t limited to only that, but also to general dark themes in the story such as violence, war and ‘wtf this is so wrong but yet I can’t stop reading’. 
Reign Down Like wow. A whole world built around what if Voldemort survived and used Hermione in his evil schemes and had Bellatrix engaged to her. Very detailed and the author doesn’t hold back on aspects of the new world that can be somewhat unsettling. 25/10 this will leave you wondering just how sexy dark magic can truly feel. 
The Dark Corners of the Earth This one is dark in an entirely different sense. Bellatrix and Snape are pitted in an ancient war against one another and Hermione is caught in the middle. The romance moves a bit too fast paced for me but the lore and detail in this will have you really thinking this story over the next few days, trying to figure out just wtf is going on. 45/10 will have you hoping your nightlight can keep Cthulhu away. 
Haunted This story won’t leave you haunted, but it is pretty good even with it’s short chapters and all. It tells the story of Hermione sort of losing her marbles but I won’t get into too much detail. Just read it for yourself; it’s a quick easy read. 10/10 is poetic as fuck. 
I Dream of Sin Takes place in a sort of canon world in which Hermione is an American teen being bullied. You can imagine how well that goes for the bullies especially when she learns she has magic and is taught by Bellatrix herself on how to use it. It gets progressively darker each chapter. 16/10 don’t want to mess with magical nerds ever. 
For whom the Bell Tolls is an interesting look into how Hermione’s actually a death eater and Bellatrix is not. While Hermione is not bat shit insane, she is a murderer and Bellatrix is the sane one. Nice to see things switched up. This story is not necessarily as dark as the others but it gets brownie points for making the usually good Hermione evil right off the bat. 9/10 come to the dark side, we have cookies. 
Staring at Nothing is just...wow.  A very powerful one shot about Hermione’s descent into darkness as told by Harry’s perspective. 10/10 for who needs friends anyways, when you’ve got black leather. 
Visions of You in which Hermione is a depressed youth after the war and has to deal with hallucinations of Bellatrix. Hermione isn’t dark here so much as she is gray type, and the story has a permeating tinge of sadness to it, given the circumstances. 8/10 for maybe Bellatrix isn’t a hallucination? 
Deep Below what’s more awful than being accused of Harry’s death? Being falsely accused of it, and having to deal with trying to prove your innocent. This is a situation Hermione ends up in. But will she get out of it? 8/10 for this gets deep. 
How to Love Bellatrix captures Hermione and sort of indoctrinates her into the world of darkness. Hermione is mad at first, but then she realizes how sexy Bellatrix is and is like, ‘alright fam, sign me up’ and boom Bellamione. 8/10 you love this story but not it’s update schedule. 
TIME TRAVELER AU’s
Basically, what it says on the tin. Someway or another, Hermione goes back into time to stop Bellatrix from ever becoming evil. Drama and romance ensue. 
Future Shocks A good time turner fic with a more modern take on war. It’s pretty long and it is the slowburn of all slowburns. But it’s a very interesting story and the ending will have you definitely shook. 8/10 will shock you awake from that boring lecture you’re reading fanfic in. 
Time Heals all Wounds Hermione gets sent back in time to ‘redeem’ Bellatrix but not in the gift card way, more like saving the future type way. They end up, you guessed it, falling in love and changing the future somewhat. 6/10 is a young teen romance that will have you reliving your adventures as a young sapphic witch. 
Mirror, Mirror Not exactly a time turner fic, more like a parallel world, I suppose. Hard to explain but has good amounts of mystery and trying to understand what is happening. Focuses more on Bellatrix’s POV which is a nice change of pace. 8/10 will have you looking in the mirror and summoning Bellatrix like she was Bloody Mary. 
Let the Light Come and Take me A time turner fic that ends up with Bellatrix time traveling but to the future and the chaos her arrival there causes for those who are acquainted with her devious ways. Looks at the growth of our two ladies relationship into something more. 5/10 if it’s not slowburn romance is it really Bellamione?
The One Within the Other this story is about, you guessed it, time travel! Hermione goes back on purpose to stop Bellatrix from achieving her evil potential and in the process love blossoms. 7/10 for never enough time to read Bellamione in peace!
Caught in the Time series this is a series of three full length stories about Bellamione stuck in different times and universes. So much happens in them it’s kind of hard to summarize so the best thing to do is read them. 8, 8.5, 7/10 I’ll let you figure out which score goes for which series.
Just say When started off as a time turner story but then it ended up becoming something more of an espionage tale. It’s a good read and interesting to see how Bellatrix aims to save Hermione from a dementor’s kiss (spoilers!) in order to save their future together. A good mix of romance and action. 8/10 The name’s Black. Bellatrix, Black. 
The Broken Wand It all starts with a wand and then before you know it, boom, time travel happens. Featuring Loki and adventure all around, this fic has interesting plot points to keep you engaged despite the slower update times. 7/10, will break your wand too. 
Hourglass basically, a young Bellatrix is brought into the future and consequences abound from that mishap. The plot is a bit wonky and there are some logic mistakes, but if you can get over it, it’s a decent time travel story. 5/10 for it must be canon that Bellatrix has a lovely hourglass figure. 
Times they are a Changing where Bellatrix travels back in time to save her wife, Hermione. Nice to see a story where Hermione isn’t the one doing all the saving. Unfortunately there’s only six chapters to this story and it’s unlikely it’ll ever get finished but it’s a nice fresh concept. 6/10 for that’s how many chapters there are. 
Destined in this one, Hermione experiences some wonky times after the battle at the department of mysteries. Hermione has to find a way back home, but perhaps she might find love along the way? 10/10 for this is destined to be an interesting read. 
HEALER AU’s 
Let’s be real, Bellatrix has got a lot of problems and these authors try to solve them, with sex. And you know, medical help. But sex definitely helps a lot. 
Portrait of a Tragic Woman Not a typical healer type au, because Hermione is a therapist whose helping Bellatrix with her mental disorders. Focuses a lot on the relationship between the two and really makes you try to figure out what exactly is up with Bellatrix and what is her past, etc. The ending chapters will leave you shooketh and wondering what even is real anymore. 50/10 because it feels like an acid trip, man. 
The Healer is only one chapter but still worth a read. Hopefully the author will have some time to get back to it because it has a huge potential. 6/10 because I need some healing. 
1k is a one shot, featuring Hermione as a therapist and Bellatrix as her patient. Can’t say too much without spoiling it, but despite it’s short length, the author paints a vivid look into Bellatrix’s mind if she was just an insane muggle. 1k/10 because that’s one patient I would never like to meet.
Darkness Underneath I mean, Hermione runs a team of healers, so technically it’s kinda a healer au fic, right? This story looks more in depth at the Death Eaters and dark magic surrounding them. 9/10 is that a dark mark or are you just happy to see me?
TEACHER AU
We all know this is the holy grail au of this fandom and yet there’s only a couple of long stories for this. Someone, write some more!
Fractures A long fic, that has a sequel. Basically, Bellatrix is Hermione’s teacher during a very trying time for Hermione when a competition goes very wrong and dark truths are revealed. Lot’s of action, Bellamione interactions, and overall interesting plot. 8/10 will leave your heart in fractures when you find out the sequel is unfinished. 
In the Dead of Night Hermione asks Bellatrix if she can teach her some.....magic and things end up becoming very magical indeed. Bellatrix is the teacher in this story (because who wouldn’t want her as a teacher). It’s a WIP with only a couple of chapters out. 7/10 time to learn some real lessons, Granger ;)
Just a Brand features not only Bellatrix as a professor, but a magical soul mate bond between Bellatrix and Hermione that leads to much deliciousness. There’s a lot of chapters to this story but they’re pretty short. An updated and revised version can be found on a03 for those who like longer chapters. 7/10 Bellamione is branded on my soul. 
It Just Felt Right is another fic with Bellatrix as the professor. Hermione starts off hating her and then it evolves into liking Bellatrix. The fic leaves off before any real progress can be made so if anyone is up for reading an unfinished fic from 2012 then go for it. 6/10 for this story feels right but not write because it’s abandoned :(
CRIME AU 
Because there is never enough crime involved even with Bellatrix, these authors amp up the trouble and make it double. And gay. So very gay. 
Two Sides of the Same Coin where Bellatrix is basically an auror. It’s only five chapters and it hasn’t been updated in a long time but it’s an interesting concept worth checking out. 9/10 wish there were more sides to the coin. 
Murder Most Horrid A crime story, where Bellatrix is a magical cop and Hermione is a murder suspect. Bellatrix interrogates Hermione by banging her and then the two of them proceed to basically get married the day after. A bit ooc for Bellatrix but very in character if you consider this world not from the canon. -89/10 for how badly your vision will deteriorate if you try to read this all in one night. 
The Mysterious Department Technically Bellatrix and Hermione are both magical detectives and they go and solve crimes and shit while also possibly trying to prevent the world from ending. You know, just casual stuff. 10/10 for the perfect crime, would commit again. 
Darkness is Falling A story that has Hermione as an auror who replaces Bellatrix’s old partner. They butt heads, they solve cases, and naturally, begin to fall in love. 7/10 for this case is closed. 
Some Things Aren’t Seen Hermione investigates Bellatrix’s crimes and past and ends up over her head. There are two follow ups to this finished work, all in the same vein. It’s all a good bit of fun watching Hermione try to take on the criminal Lestrange. 7/10, no, this has no relation to the musical Wicked. 
SOUL MATE BOND 
In one way or another Bellatrix and Hermione have a special bond in between them that destines them to be together. Angst, love, friendship, all abound in this au type. Features a combination of other factors thrown in, but the stories put in here are largely advertised in the blurb as more focused on the bond. 
Lotus Flower Hermione finds out after Bellatrix’s death that they are bound together and that because Bellatrix is dead, Hermione is dying as a result too. This begs the question, will Hermione go back in time and save Bellatrix, or will she willingly submit to the bond’s curse? 8/10 I think we all know what Hermione chooses.
Our Mercurial Selves ever wonder what it would be like to have a murderer share your mind? In this one, Hermione and Bellatrix can communicate telepathically with each other, creating a bond that draws them together. Features evil schemes by Voldemort, a flying horse, and Narcissa beating the ever loving shit out of Bellatrix for even daring to breathe in Hermione’s direction. 9/10 will leave you with warm fuzzies for the Malfoy family before the ending crushes you. 
The House Ring Bellatrix sends Hermione a magical ring that engages them and basically makes them wives. Prophecies abound about how Bellamione is meant to be the one and only true pairing. 7/10 for that ring better come with diamonds.
Demons AU
As if Voldemort isn’t scary enough, there are demons and scary things in this au type that will leave you and Voldemort both calling for mommy. 
Unsteady Precipice technically also a time traveling fic, except Hermione ends up in an alternative universe. where she tries to change things from happening in the canon world like they did. But will it work? Who knows! Only a few chapters are out so it’s hard to tell where this story will go, but one things for sure, it’ll be good. 9/10 if you don’t pray after reading this the demons will get you. 
A Demon in the Mist is also about, gasp, demons! Dangerous things are afoot in this story and Hermione is caught in the middle of it all. It takes part in the same universe as the caught in time series by the same author, but with slight alterations. Unsure if the story will be finished as the author has contemplated leaving fanfic writing. 7/10 can you find the demon in the mist?
MAGICAL CREATURES AU
Technically a category, right? Let’s pretend it is, because there are some stories out there that pit our two ladies as other than human and it’s fun to read about it. 
As we Chase the Sun Very Black family centric and features Bellatrix as a big fluffy wolf. What’s not to love? Cuddles, and hair balls, and good times all around. 9/10 would tame that wolf. 
Sing to me Your Insanity in which Hermione and Bellatrix are both sirens and will basically die if they don’t do the ol’ frickity frack. This is a long story and the slowburn feels like hellburn but it’s worth the read. 56/10 but you will need earplugs so those sirens don’t seduce you too. 
Metamorphosis in which Bellatrix is also a wolf and doesn’t like being stuck with Hermione but gets used to it and basically they’re house wives of London and don’t know it. 8/10 for your mind with undergo metamorphosis from slightly obsessed with Bellamione to even more obsessed. 
This Poisoned Blood of Ours vampires, vampires everywhere! Two parts to this series and features a confused Bellatrix and a changing Hermione. 7/10 do you think vampires like steak rare?
Cursed Doll Pretty self explanatory title. Someone ends up as a doll and shenanigans ensue. Won’t say more because it’s only two chapters, but it’s well written and worth a read. 10/10 Chucky? Is that your sister? 
Liquid Measure these chapters are thicc boy. Only two chapters but such a good set up and everything. I hope the author is able to update at some point. 10/10 makes me thirsty for more!
My Demons in the Dark Hermione is a ghost. That’s it, that’s the plot. Boo/10 for this not so spooky spirit. 
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darkpoisonouslove · 3 years
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Sparks of Life Opera Edition
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I am still not over Singing a New Tune so I am going to recap for you the experience of writing that fic because there were many interesting moments over the course of those three days. Lemme start from the beginning.
- So I’m writing a fic that mostly focuses on sexual stuff but it is also mainly happening in an opera so my first order of business is to figure out what that opera is. Both the building itself and the show they’ll be watching. Because that is of utmost importance.
- I have already mentioned that SoL is located in New York so I looked up New York operas. I do not vibe with research most of the time but I vibe even less with having to come up with names for any kind of thing so research was definitely the choice here.
- I somehow get results about operas that are in the other end of the USA. That was not great. I get to the Metropolitan Opera House at last (which I might have known existed if I cared about opera in any way, shape or form) which is great! I am so close to starting the fic! Just need to figure out what opera they’re watching. Because I need that for reasons.
- I end up downloading a PDF with the seatings inside the Met Opera so that I can figure out where the hell they will be seating. But I leave that for later. I look through the actual plays that they’re having while absolutely failing with the navigation of their site. I find a show that catches my eye. It’s called The Magic Flute. I have zero idea what it’s about so I read the Wikipedia summary just to be aware. It mentions that a character has a moment when he’s singing about his search for a wife and I think “Perfect! Foreshadowing!” (since this is set pretty early on in Griffin and Valtor’s relationship).
- I decide to look up the opera and see if I can find a part of it on youtube to figure out how it will sound. I am pretty sold on it already because of the summary I read and also because it implies there is magic as a subject in it which would call back to canon. Still, I look it up. I find a full version of it on the internet with English subtitles... It is 2 hours and 35 minutes:
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- “Wow, okay... that’s a bit much. But hey, it has got subtitles in English. Maybe I’d actually watch that... once I’m done with the fic. I’m just gonna listen to a little bit while I finish my research, though, so I can have an idea of what it sounds like.”
- Now it’s time to open the engagement fic - Enough to Be Yours - because I don’t remember what year they got engaged in and I need that to reverse engineer the year in which this fic is taking place so that I can make sure that The Magic Flute was being performed back then. I don’t have an year stated in the engagement fic, though. I have a date - 9th October which is Friday and that means the year is 2015. Great! So I need to figure out if they were performing The Magic Flute back in 2010. Great.
- That takes a shit ton of time and nerves as it turns out. I spent over 4 hours just researching the logistics for this fic and a lot of that was unnecessary but I’m getting ahead of myself.
- I cannot find out whether they were performing the Magic Flute in 2010. I get results of it being broadcast in English (for the first time, I believe) in 2012 but that is way too late for this fic to be happening. Also, they are speaking of a broadcast which just doesn’t work for me. So I am having a hard time over here.
- I find a list of the new titles in 2011 but nothing mentions The Magic Flute as far as I can see.
- I am now considering switching to another opera. I see an opera that is based on events from The Song of the Nibelungs (I cannot be assed to go back and check what the actual title was). That catches my eye because I have read a book that was titled The Ring of the Nibelungs, I believe, and I kinda remember stuff from it... which is what makes me hesitate because that was a big tragedy.
- Meanwhile, I have stumbled upon a trailer for The Magic Flute:
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MY GOD IS THAT BEAUTIFUL! THOSE PROPS ARE FUCKING GORGEOUS! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN THAT YOU GET TO GO AND SEE THAT LIVE? THAT IS NUTS! (Also, when I mentioned paper birds (I think they are) in the fic, I meant the ones shown in 0:13, not the big one in the beginning but HOLY SHIT, DID YOU SEE THAT THING????? HOW IS THAT REAL?!?!?!?! IT IS SO FUCKING AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN’T. I AM DYING. THIS IS JUST TOO BEAUTIFUL.)
- I somehow happen upon an old archive of the opera (idk how I did that but I bookmarked it in case I’ll need it again) that has information about plays going back as far as the year 1900. This is nuts! I am in too deep but I can’t pull myself away. I’ve gotten this far, I will see it through.
- I search for keyword “flute” and I get results. Some of them are pretty old but I finally find what I need. Performances of the Magic Flute in 2010! Bingo!
-  ...Oh, wait, they’re all around Christmas and New Year’s Eve. Hmm... when will it be okay for them to go? I mean, Valtor has been established to have zero free time around that time of the year and I can’t see them going on the 24th or the 31st... Oh, those are matinees. Definitely no! I need them to go in the evening. And some of these are broadcasts which doesn’t work for me either.
- I looked up earlier years as well. I considered another opera again. I decided to switch up the timeline a little. It makes sense if it’s in 2009. I think they had spring performances of The Magic Flute then. Or was it 2008? Anyway, I finally settle on an early April date in 2009 (I think). Now that that’s settled, let’s go back to the seats.
- First I need to figure out what floor (let’s say) of the opera they’re on. I was thinking of the last one first (family circle) but the boxes (I figure those seats will be safest for their activities) look like this:
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which isn’t vibing with me because they would be in the front row and it seems more visible. So I relocate to the previous floor (balcony) that looks like this:
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That works a little better although there’s the danger of having more people in their box. But they’re sitting in box 14, seats 5 (Griffin) and 6 (Valtor) (where the arrow is pointing) and there’s only one man in seat 4 in front of them. So that is the best I can do.
- Wow, all that’s finally figured out. I decide to do all the rest of the research up front in order to be able to just write after that and not stop for another 4 hours. More on those other things later BUT I get to the part where I need to pick a vibrator and... well, I done fucked up.
- First thing that comes up for a remote controlled vibrator is Lush, of course. And I am immediately sold because it has a sound activated setting which Valtor will definitely love to utilize while in the opera.
BUT
Lush 2 (which is the first one to have the sound activated setting, I believe) came out in 2018. Even if we accept that Lush also has it, that came out in 2015. My fic is set in 2009. Searching for 2009 vibrators literally went no where so in the end I decided that the SoL verse is actually set in a parallel universe where time is a little warped so the Lush 2 is out in 2009. Plus, that way there isn’t going to be a pandemic in future installments. Overall, that works. Except that I needn’t have been so thorough with my opera research beforehand. Oh, well. It’s finally time to start writing.
- How do you write? How do you start a fic? One word in front of the other? Oh, okay, never mind. Lipstick is a girl’s best friend. Let’s start from there. And a kiss that leads to the discussion of lipstick... Damn, I forgot to spend one more hour on researching what kind of lipstick Griffin would have worn. Shame! You don’t get that detail now. I believe I didn’t even mention a shade.
- Oh, wait. Need for his breath to taste like something. Hmm, let’s see. Tonic water? Yeah, that sounds about right. Never mind that he should have probably drunk it right before getting out of the car to kiss her if it was still lingering on his breath. I mean, that’s not impossible. Just improbable.
- He’s also wearing cologne, right? Gotta research that too. How else would I get this:
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and zero idea what it actually smells like despite the description. Also, did not check if that was a thing in 2009 but the story now exists in a vacuum so who cares.
- Apparently, Griffin doesn’t own any golden bracelets even though she does have a golden necklace? Or she could have a golden bracelet, just not one she likes for the current situation? Anyway, I wanted to mention Ediltrude as well because the twins always go together and that was the best I came up with. (That said, I didn’t need to put the mentions of them one sentence apart.)
- My god, I used a semicolon! That feels illegal. I sure hope I used that bitch correctly.
- Okay, I absolutely love all the banter and just flow in the car. Idk how I did that since it’s such a constricted space but I am really proud of it. However, the logistics were sometimes hard to logic my way through. I mean, Valtor doesn’t get to look at her a lot and I had to employ a red traffic light to give him the chance to do so.
- I hit a wall about three paragraphs later. Things started going in a weird direction. I was considering even deleting the last two lines but then I managed to get back on track thanks to having figured out how they met and I decided to write a little bit about that without spoiling it (that will be a fic of its own some day). Suffice it to say it was a meet-very-ugly. But it bailed me out. Also, they got over it so it’s all good.
- And now... that paragraph. You know which one I’m talking about. It stands out with the locations I’ve given. That paragraph required 30 minutes of looking at Google Earth to figure it out and I still nearly got it wrong. At that point it occurred to me that they’ll need a place to park. I mean, idk how parking is in NYC but it’s probably not the way it is in Bulgaria especially on small neighborhood streets where it’s just... park wherever (even in front of a garage if you’re brazen enough and don’t fear having your tires slashed). So first, I was going to have them coming down Tenth Avenue and passing by the backside of the Opera which is not ideal for me because I needed Griffin to figure out they’re going to the opera so that they can have the following dialogue. But there is the New York Public Library of the Performing Arts right next door so I figure Griffin will recognize the area if it’s next to a library. And I have them almost at the garage but... that’s not looking right. This garage is on 65th Street and mine is on 62nd... I have been looking at the wrong garage for the past hour. Now that I have caught that mistake, things get easier. They just drive right past the facade of the opera, take a right turn and then enter the garage. Easy peasy. For whoever’s actually paying attention to the map.
- They’re in the garage now and I have to write another kiss. Shoot! I do not vibe with writing kisses. Writing sex scenes is much easier. But I’ll try my best because this is a little bit necessary if we’re dealing with an insertion of a vibrator in a public bathroom one minute from now. (Again, logistics!) I actually went back to add in a little discomfort during the kiss (but not too much because they’re consumed with each other anyway and probably missed something) just to make it more realistic. They can’t be comfortable in the car. Also, you have got to love how I never even thought of what make the car is. But I did stop to research the tinting of the car windows.
- Now this is extremely funny but I would have had zero idea that there are different laws about how tinted your car windows can be in the USA if I hadn’t read a very extensive critique of Fifty Shades (whichever part it was that had that info). So I look up the VLT for New York and it says 70%. Great! Then it won’t be that visible through the windows what they’re doing inside. Oh, wait! VLT means Visible Light Transmission aka 70% of the light should be passing through the window. Aka it is only tinted on 30%. This much:
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That’s practically nothing. You can see everything through it. Welp, then someone’s gonna see, I guess.
- Can’t believe I didn’t stop to look up clutches either. (Lmao, I was calling it a purse instead of a clutch at first even though I definitely meant a clutch. And then I remembered that clutch existed as a word. Who would’ve thought?) It’s baffling trying to figure out why my brain was prioritizing some details over others and I just genuinely have no idea what was going on.
- Griffin is blushing a lot in this. Can you tell I have no idea how else to convey Valtor giving her feelings through body language?
- I first envisioned the box being opened by the hair pin by turning it like a key. Only later did I realize that that wouldn’t be possible because the pin has two parts (whatever they’re called) and that would make turning it impossible unless all of the base fits into one hole in the lid of the box. So I had to adapt my vision to using the extensions at the ends of the hair pin like a hook that pulls the lid up once it’s clicked free. I have zero idea how that would be done but I’m sure it can be done. So yeah, anyway, the pin looks like this but with attachments at the ends to open the box:
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- I might have gone a little overboard with Griffin’s reaction to having the vibrator inside her. I might have made her a bit too embarrassed but I still think that she simply wouldn’t appreciate someone knowing about what she considers a private experience (despite the very public setting).
- And I am being overly specific again with the seats but I worked for that information so you’re getting it against your will!
- Speaking of, that man in their box was pretty ignored throughout the fic. But then again Griffin wasn’t overflowing with lucidity. She is sure to have missed... A Lot, actually.
- My apologies (once again) to @her-majesty-wears-jeans​ for not letting Griffin punch Valtor in the face for the terrible pun he was about to make but I thought that that would ruin the mood so I had to skip it.
- I might have imagined things a little differently but then consent factored in and I had to change things up so that Griffin is clearly on board with everything. I hope it came through that way at least. She is on board even if she is very, very frustrated. She would never throw the bet just because it’s difficult for her. Though, I’m taking note for future fics of maybe being a little bit more explicit about the enjoyment of all parties involved. I just couldn’t really think of a way to convey it better back then and I am coming up with several ideas now and I will try to keep them in mind for future fics.
- I keep going back and forth on just how far into their relationship this is. Sometimes it feels like it’s not enough time for them to get this familiar with each other and sometimes it feels like too much for them to still be skirting their feelings for each other like that. Will update when I make up my mind about how long exactly it has been.
- In retrospect, probably should have picked up an opera that people would be less likely to bring their children to (as brought to my attention by @her-majesty-wears-jeans​). I apologize for this. Did not consider it at all.
- A wild tangent about Griffin’s sexual experiences before Valtor popped up (for the second time now). This is giving me thoughts and I am not even sure if I’ll manage to get them all out in the bachelorette party fic. Oh, no, I am getting ideas again.
- God, I had to mention those paper birds because I adore them. Also, needed to do a time skip somehow (sure hope they don’t show up at the very end or the very beginning).
- So there are some things about the whole thing with the suit jacket that if you squint, you’ll miss the very far-fetched and convoluted ways in which I could make them make sense but again, it isn’t impossible to make them operate according to logic so good enough.
- And now for the dress:
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I thought it would be reasonable for Griffin to own something like that. It doesn’t look overly expensive or dramatic.
- I swear that most of the 2% angst was an accident. Griffin was supposed to say the “You paid how much for tickets exactly just so you could fool around?” line but the following few paragraphs sprang on me out of nowhere. That was where I left it off the first day I was working on it and I wasn’t sure how to continue it. Then the angst happened.
- I do not believe the retaliation part was planned but would it really be a Griffin x Valtor story if something like that hadn’t happened? XD
- “reverberated”, “multitudinous” and “unobtainable” are probably not words that Griffin’s muddled mind would go to in that precise moment but everything else I came up with for them just did not sound right.
- I completely forgot the word for neckline and was so mad at myself for that but, luckily, I managed to remember it before posting the fic. I believe the original read “he slipped a finger under the fabric of her dress, running it over the top of her breast” which is not incorrect but just not precise enough for my liking.
- Sure hope the shortened version of the opera did not cut out the ending musical sequence. But that seems unlikely.
- The idea was running overly long in my head by having them going back to the penthouse so that I could have the scene where he picked her up so I decided to move things around and have him carry her bridal style on their way from the opera to the car. It’s not like she didn’t earn it.
- Pretty sure I had planned something a little different for the last several lines of dialogue but I couldn’t remember what so we get this. Which isn’t a disadvantage. I mean, Griffin is already thinking of marrying him. XD (That’s probably a bit of a stretch at the current status of their relationship but then again, she was thinking of a wedding, not necessarily of their wedding even though I’m clearly a little romance gargoyle that meant exactly that.)
- Originally, Valtor was supposed to floor the brakes while they were out in the NYC traffic but then I decided that doing it while still in the garage with only one car behind them and both vehicles driving at a very slow speed was a lot safer so I switched to that. It also saved me writing more words which was appreciated. I thought this fic would be a bit shorter.
- I was at a loss for how many orgasms Griffin should want from him but then the commitment line happened and that was all avoided.
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