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buckydeniro · 3 years

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This Is Trouble

part 1

dad’sbestfriend!bucky barnes x reader

a/n: okay, i’m prettyyy new to writing and this is my first jab at writing a series or something that isn’t a hc so please be gentle with me. this could be complete shit and suck ass but ya know what, oh well! i’m a slut for dad’sbestfriend!bucky so here ya go! i really hope you enjoy it!! :-)

summary: you didn’t plan this. he didn’t either. you thought you would come home from college, spend some time with your dad, and find a place for yourself to live. but you soon found yourself in a sexual tension filled challenge with your dad’s best friend. but what happens when feelings develop and they become too strong to deny?

"Dad." You groan as he covers your eyes with his hands. You had just graduated college and after a few days spent packing up your stuff from your apartment near school and saying your goodbyes to your friends, you're finally back home. Your dad had the biggest grin on his face when he picked you up and you had a feeling he was up to something even though he swore he wasn't.

Now with his hands over your eyes in front of the door of your childhood home, you knew he was up to something.

"What's going on?" You ask, hearing the sound of people shuffling and a few shushing each other behind the door. "I know you hate surprises but you're back home so you're going to have to deal with it for the sake of your poor dad who has missed his daughter." You chuckle, a smile pulling at your lips.

You loved your dad. Your mom left when you were fairly young, hadn't even hit the double digits age range yet before her and your dad decided it was best to part ways. She never called or wrote, just left. But you made your way with your dad.

The sound of the door opening shakes you from your thoughts. Your dad removing his hands from your eyes to reveal a moderate sized group of family and friends before you.

Your eyes go big the exact moment they all yell out "Surprise!!" A red hot blush rushes to your cheeks and you smile bashfully, never having been one to like being the center of attention. You don't catch it but if you did you would have seen your dads best friend leaning against the kitchen doorway, lips moving up into a smile at your reaction.

"Okay, this was a pretty good surprise." Your smile blooms from shy and uncomfortable to happy and touched. You immediately hug your father, "Thank you. So much."

He gives you a tight squeeze causing you to choke out, "Dad." Chuckling at him as he lets go, letting air refill your lungs.

"I'm gonna give you some time with everyone. Good luck." With a kiss to the side of your head, Everyone begins rushing up, congratulating you, hugging you, commenting on how much you've grown and changed.

After nodding at one of the older womans dramatized comments about how she could hardly recognize you now, you feel someone watching you. Your eyes smoothly and quickly find Bucky, and you're almost thrown off actual physical balance at how good he looks. Holy shit. You swallow, your stomach doing a flip. Okay, what the fuck was that, stomach?

Not only have you changed but so as he. You breathe in through your nose as you take him in. The light stubble dancing on his jaw, a tight black shirt, the chains of his dog tags peaking out from the shirts collar. See he still wears those, you think to yourself. His black jeans matching his black boots have you trying not to bite your lip. You blink and quickly turn away, zoning back into the atmosphere around you.

He's always been attractive but jesus, when did he get that attractive. I guess you've both grown.

Apparently the lady, Lila, had still been talking to you, unaware your attention was pulled elsewhere for a moment. Firing questions off at you at a rapid speed, not stopping to hear your answers. So she's basically just having a conversation with herself and you've been deemed the appropriate audience for aome reason.

You hear footsteps coming towards you, flicking your eyes up, you see Bucky walking and stopping right in front of you. Oh my god. He smells amazing. No. What the fuck are you thinking? Reign it in, Y/N.

"Lila, don't wear the poor girl out." His bright, friendly smile drifting from her to you and you can't help the smile mirroring his on your lips. "Oh, I'm not." She chides, squeezing your arm softly with affection, "But I'll go." She playfully sighs and walks away.

Bucky's eyes haven't left yours, that contagious smile still on his face. "Welcome home, kid." That Brooklyn drawl has you biting your lip as you smile. It was a completely innocent movement, a habit you picked up a few years ago but it causes Bucky to look down at your lips, quickly flicking his gaze back to you as he inhales, mentally shaking thoughts from his head.

"Thank you, Mr. Barnes." You say politely. Bucky pulls a face and laughs, causing you to laugh along with him. Why is everything he does so contagious? He shakes his head as he speaks. "No, no, kid. Call me Bucky."

You nod your head once before pulling a face of your own. "Okay, but you can't call me 'kid' anymore. I'm 22, Bucky." The new 'title' leaving your mouth like an acception to a challenge.

He nods his head, lifting his hands up in mock defence, smirking at the way you said his name.

"Okay, okay. I got it. Y/N." His voice falls soft, almost sounding like he just found out what your name was and was calling you by it for the first time.

"Ah, Y/N, see you've caught up with Buck." Your dad grins, slapping a friendly hand on Bucky's shoulder. "Come on, party is out back."

Steve leads the way, both you and Bucky following. You purse your lips, fighting off a smile and Bucky snorts. "Party." You say quietly, glancing at Bucky as he retorts back speaking quietly so your dad doesn't hear, "Oh yeah, it's raging, can't you tell? Might just give them college parties of yours a run for their money."

You hum in acknowledgement, "You might be right, Barnes. But, I have been to some good ones."

"Barnes, huh?" You can't quite read the look on his face. All you know is that you're both looking at each other with some kind of playfulness, like the beginning of a new game has just started and you're on opposing sides.

"Mhm. Barnes." You overly dictate the 'B' in his name, drawing the 'A' out a bit, making a clicking sound with the side of your mouth, your focus forward.

Your dad turns around, clapping you softly on the shoulder, "Have fun, hon. One of the guys is calling for me. Sam! I'm coming!" You watch as your dad huffs, jogging up to his friend, swatting the spatula away from his hands, focus on the grill Sam was, I guess, butchering.

"So, you still do that." You turn your head back to Bucky, furrowing your eyebrows a little, tilting your head slightly, confusion lightly appearing on your face. "Do what?"

He puts his gloved covered hands into his jacket pockets, clearing his throat, "You make that sound when you're focusing on something or are nervous." There's a slight pause before he speaks up again. "You nervous with the get together or bein' back home or somethin'?"

You didn't realize you even did that. You were a little nervous but it wasn't because of the party your dad threw for you. It was because of Bucky. It's a good nervous but it confuses you none the less.

"Yeah. Just being back home." You nod, lips tugging up at the corner for a smile. "The change and everything."

Bucky doesn't look quite convinced but lets it go. Your attention is drawn forward, wanting to look anywhere but Bucky. The way he looks at you was fogging up your brain.

"You still wear the dog tags."

This time he tilts his head, the corner of his mouth twitching upwards. "I can notice things too, Bucky." You whisper with a smile, your attention turning back to him, causing him to chuckle.

"Well, they are mine, Doll." You both freeze. Fuck, he thinks. It just slipped out. He couldn't help it. He's fucked it now, shit. But you chew on your bottom lip, fighting back a smile but the hint of it is there and Bucky catches it and feels as if he can breathe again.

"Doll, huh?" You repeat his words back to him.

With a slight cocky tilt of his head, a subtle smirk and something dancing in both of your eyes, he throws it right back at you. Repeating your own words, the exact way you said them to him, "Mhm. Doll."

Before you could react, say anything, he had turned and casually walked away, yelling a hello at one of his and your dad's old friends and although you couldn't see his face, he had the biggest smirk on it. You let out a breath, not knowing what to make of yours and his interaction.

It was Bucky. Just Bucky. Your dad's best friend. He was just being friendly and teasing. Normal. But as you walk to grab a beer from the cooler near by, you can't help but question a little, "Right?"

Straightening your back, you feel eyes on you and you immediately know whose they are. Turning your head, you lock eyes with the brown haired man, taking a swig of his beer.

Your brain repeating the question again, "..Right?"

#bucky barnes #sebastian stan #bucky barnes au x reader #bucky barnes hc #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes smut #dadsbestfriend!bucky x reader #dadsbestfriend!buckybarnes #dadsbestfriend!bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnea angst #marvel masterlist #bucky barnes masterlist

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airis-paris14 · 3 years

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Wonder What She Thinks 4

Summary: She learns to put herself first and he loses the best thing he ever had.

Masterlist || 4 || 5

I’m not the jealous type, I like the other guys, I wish you all the best, I’ll help you pick her dress… I’m actually happy for you. - “Wonder What she Thinks of Me” Chloe x Halle

“I can’t believe y’all are making me do this,” Zoe huffed as she dipped all three tests in the cup by the sink. “Girl please,” Sylia dismissed, “you’re lucky you got a roommate who’s an OB. I can spot a pregnant lady from a mile away.”

“And if you’re not pregnant, at least you know you aren’t,” Kenois shrugged from her position on the closed toilet. “And what if I am?” Zoe frowned, setting the tops back on each of the clear blue tests. “What do you wanna do? You wanna terminate? Give up for adoption? Keep?”

“I wanna keep it. I can financially support a baby and I’m already kind of attached to the idea of having a little me running around. I just don’t know how the father is gonna take it,” the young nurse admitted. “Who is the baby daddy?” Kenois prodded. “Is it that dude you had the one-night stand with?”

“That’s the only timeline that fits.” Zoe tapped her fingers on the counter behind her. “Well, at least it isn’t T’Challa’s. With his engagement he-“ Sylvia trailed off noticing the change in her friend's face. “Unless the one-night stand was T’Challa.” She raised an eyebrow and Zoe dropped her face into her hands.

“Zoe,” Kenois groaned.

“I know. I know. I regretted it as soon as it happened,“ She moaned. “Not that! How come you didn’t tell us!”

“You said you hadn’t heard from him in months,” Sylia frowned. “I haven’t. We had a drunken conversation when I spotted him out, I cussed him out for ghosting, he made the usual promises, and we had sex. I left before he even woke up the next morning,” Zoe shrugged. “And now you’re having an engaged man’s baby,” Kenois added.

“We don’t know that she’s pregnant yet,” Sylvia pushed back. “I thought you could spot a pregnant lady from a mile away?” Zoe teased.

“Heaux, I'm tryna help you!”Sylia kissed her teeth.

The group dissolved into laughter and Zoe raised her hands in surrender. “Besides I’d be a bad doctor if I didn’t consider that the symptoms I’m seeing couldn’t be the result of something else, like your recent switch in birth control, which you should really stop taking until we can get an official test done in the lab.”

The nurse nodded before looking at her two best friends. “What would I do without y’all?” She began tearing up and the other women pulled her into a group hug. “You’ll never have to find out, because we’ll always be here,” Kenois pulled back, wiping her friend’s tears. Sylia nodded in agreement. “We’ll be here every step of the way. I’ll deliver the baby, and Kenois will be her pediatrician until she graduates college, then we’ll all cry as we watch our baby go off and live life.”

“What if it’s a boy?” Kenois teased. The gynecologist shrugged, “He’d throw off the dynamic, but we’d make it work. Make sure he knows how to treat a woman and get him all dressed up in little suits and sweaters.” Sylia gushed.

“Y’all, I’m terrified,” Zoe whispered out, causing her friends to stop their chatter. “I mean I’m not married, my baby’s father is royalty and engaged to someone who is not me-“ Zoe paused before dropping her head between her knees, “and I kissed Michael,” she moaned. “Umm come again?”Kenois demanded with a smile covering her face. “When he took me to the club last night, we kissed,” she repeated.

“Okay, well how do you feel about it?” Sylia pried, trying to understand where her friend's head was at. “I loved it,” the nurse sighed. “I loved being with him, but this is gonna mess all that up.”

“You don’t know that,” Sylia soothed, hopping up to sit next to her friend. “And if he’s gonna stop talking to you over this, then he wasn’t the right one in the first place,” Kenois added. “Y’all are close because you communicate well. So sit him down and just talk about it. See where his head is at before you assume your friendship or relationship is over.”

“I don’t know. If I’m pregnant, it’s not just me anymore. I’ll have a child and we’ll be a package deal. He didn’t sign up for that.”

“At least give Michael a chance to prove you wrong,” Kenois frowned, wiping her friend’s tears. Zoe nodded as they heard the front door open and shut. “You expecting anybody?” Sylia looked at her two roommates who shook their heads.

“Iman! Sylia! Keni! Y’all left your door open again! Where y’all at?”

“Damn that nigga yelling like he pay rent,” Kenois laughed and shook her head. “I’ll go get him,” Zoe wiped her face and left the bathroom. “Where y’all at?” Michael yelled, bumping into Zoe as she came into the living room. “We were in my bathroom. And you just walking into people’s houses now?”

“Y’all the one with an open door policy. I just took advantage. No one was answering my calls and I was knocking on the door for ten minutes,” Michael moved around her to place takeout bags on their kitchen table, “Y’all need to stop doing that, what if I was some dude tryna do y’all harm?” He pulled Zoe-Iman into a hug and she relaxed in his embrace before he pulled away.

“Well I’d be calling the police right now, not standing in the kitchen,” Zoe smirked following him as he started pulling food out of the takeout bags. “Haha,” he deadpanned, “just try and lock the door, please. I already worry about y’all enough as is. Three black women living alone in this non-gated apartment complex. Weirdos just be walking in off the street-“

“Like you?”

Michael stopped and frowned, “You bout to make me pack up this breakfast and leave Iman.”

“I’m just kidding I’m sorry,” she walked over and wrapped her arms around his waist. He reciprocated the gesture and frowned as she finished speaking, “We’ll do better at locking the door. Your concern is noted and appreciated.”

“Why you been crying?”

Zoe blanched, remembering the cause of her tears. Michael had that magic effect, he could make her worries fade away effortlessly. “Oh,” she mumbled, looking away before he turned her face back to his. “I just wanna help Iman.” He searched her face as her muscles relaxed. Zoe cleared her throat,” I might be pregnant,” she answered. The room went silent and Michael dropped his hand from her face. “Okay, have you taken a test? You need me to get some?”

The nurse shook her head, “That’s what we were doing in the bathroom. Just waiting for the timer to go off. It’s probably gone off by now though,” she murmured. “Okay,” the actor ran his hand over his head, “You wanna go look?”

Zoe shook her head, “Not yet. I’m actually terrified to go back in there.”

She and Michael chuckled, “Do you know who the father is?”

“T’Challa.” She whispered.

“I thought you hadn’t seen him in months?”

“I haven’t, but before the disco club, we had a drunk one-night thing about two months ago. I was so embarrassed when I woke up. I left before he got up and swore I’d never tell anybody. Then I broke it off with him after the first night at the club and here we are,” she explained. Michael pulled her in for another hug and the two stood in the kitchen laying on each other just enjoying the embrace. “You know, this doesn’t change how I feel about you,” Michael started.

“Really?”

He nodded, his chin remained stationed on her head, “If we get together. I want all of you and that includes the child growing inside of you. They are a piece of you and for that, I already know I’m gonna love them. Even if we don’t work out as a couple, you and this child will always have me.”

Zoe felt tears filling her eyes and Michael laughed as she tried to hide it, “You so emotional” he laughed wiping her tears. “It’s not funny. It’s probably hormones,” she excused standing up to wipe her own tears. “It’s definitely hormones,” Sylia interjected from where she stood at the entrance to the kitchen. “All three?” Zoe asked and her friend nodded. “What do you mean?” Michael frowned. “All three of the pregnancy tests came back positive,” Sylia elaborated.

****

“You can’t see it right?” Zoe fretted checking to see if her five-month baby bump was visible in her dress. “No, but I still think you should tell him” Kenois pushed while watching her friend search for her shoes. Zoe stood up with one shoe in her hand, “And say what? I haven't seen you in 3 months but I’m having your baby. Oh and congratulations on getting married!” The nurse rolled her eyes and bent back down to slip the heel on her foot.

“He deserves to know he is going to have an heir in six months. Preferably before he gets married.” Kenois's eyes followed her friend as she moved around the room. “He made the decision to delete my number,” Zoe-Iman argued. “He wanted me out of his life so that he could curate this perfect image with this perfect bride and now I have to show up at their perfect wedding to play the perfect supportive best friend when I haven’t seen this man in months. He obviously still knows where we live so if he wanted to have me in his life he would have come by. But he didn’t. I will not put my child through the heartbreak of only having a father who will love them in secret.”

“Iman-“

“That is my final decision,” the nurse interrupted, grabbing her purse off of the bed and walking into the front room. “You’re going to regret this,” Kenois sighed, turning off the light and following her out.

“Hey hey,” Michael stood up off of the couch hugging Kenois then pulling his girlfriend in for a hug and kiss. “Hey baby,” Zoe smiled. “How’d you get in, I’m sure we double-locked the door last night,” Kenois asked, watching her friend interact with her new boo. Even though she was upset that Zoe-Iman wouldn’t tell T’Challa that they were expecting, she was very happy her friend had moved on. She’d watched the prince string her along for years, pretending he’d only wanted to be friends while doing everything a boyfriend should do. Zoe tried to explain it away, but Kenois saw the signs. She knew T’Challa would only break her girl’s heart and she was glad Michael could intervene and show Zoe what real love looked like.

“I let him in,” Sylia replied, leaving the kitchen with two bottles of water, handing one to the actor. “But, thank you for locking the door. Gives me some peace of mind. Especially with my main man staying here too,” Michael reached for Zoe’s bump as she swatted his hand away. “Stop. I’ve got it draped just right so my bump is hidden,” the mother fussed. “Girl,” Sylia raised an eyebrow, “that’s like trying to hide a boulder under a blanket,” the woman teased and shook her head. Zoe-Iman scoffed, “Wooow,” Zoe squinted, “I just don’t want all eyes on me. I just wanna get there, play the supportive best friend, and leave. No questions and no pitiful looks from anyone who can make an educated guess. And moreover, no drama in the press. I want a clean break.”

Ima, you know y’all are having a baby right? That’s never gonna be possible,” Michael took her hand in his and squeezed. Zoe looked away biting her lip. “Unless you’re still not planning to tell him he’s having a baby?” Sylia raised an eyebrow.

“I am the one having the baby! Not him,” Zoe insisted. “Baby, you should at least give him the option to have the child in his life. Tell him now and if he cuts y’all off again it’s his loss and you never have to see him again. But him being involved in this child’s life, is not your decision to make. He should know.” Michael frowned and lifted her face to his.

“I’ll think about it. But it won’t be today. I can’t do that to his fiancée on her wedding day,” Zoe grabbed a light jacket and walked out of the apartment leaving her boyfriend, and best friends behind.

****

“You okay?” Michael whispered in his lady’s ear. His hand rested on her lower back guiding her to their seats in the grand venue. “Right as rain,” she sighed, accepting his help to sink down in the seat. “We’re gonna go find the guys,” Kenois let the couple know before she and Sylia wandered off. “You’re ruining your perfect drape,” Michael teased as he lifted her hand that had started rubbing her five-month belly. A nervous habit she’d acquired since the moment it appeared. “Thank you,” she offered a shy smile.

“You ever think about your wedding?” Michael asked. “Sometimes,” Iman shrugged.

“Well, what’s it like?” Michael nudged her shoulder.

“I don’t want anything this big, but I want to go all out for the people I love. Small guest list, but really over the top. Flowers from ceilings, dance floors, chandeliers, maybe that really good quality fake grass in some areas so I can walk around without my shoes on.”

“I don’t understand why you always wanna be barefoot,” Michael shook his head and bit his lip. The expectant woman shrugged, “It’s the country in me. My toes feel trapped in socks and shoes. You ever walked a creek?”

“Walk a creek?”

“Yeah we used to have this creek through our yard and we’d take off our shoes, roll up our pants, and wade down the stream. Just walking on the rocks.”

“With the fish and everything?” His eyes bugged. Iman laughed, “You leave them alone, they leave you alone. Besides I learned to swim in a lake, fish don’t scare me anymore.”

“You swam in lake water? Y’all wildin’,” the actor cackled. The nurse elbowed him before joining in his amusement. “It’s not that bad. At least it ain’t got sharks,” she reasoned.

“Umm-hmm, all I know is you’d have to convince me before I go hopping in a lake anytime soon.”

“We can start with creeks and work our way up. Once the little bean is old enough, I definitely wanna make it a tradition. I want Lil bean to appreciate nature and the finer luxuries in life equally.”

“Like a boujee country hybrid?”

“Exactly,” Iman smiled, “Imma take them to the camp I went to-“

“ZoeZoe,” Camden tapped the mother on her shoulder, “What’s up Mike?” he dapped him up before addressing Zoe.

“T wants to see you,” Camden sighed. Zoe felt her heart drop, “Me? Why does he want to see me?”

“Look, I wish I knew but he’s throwing a mini tantrum. I just need him to either call off the wedding or be out here at that altar in fifteen minutes and you’re the only one he’s gonna listen to.”

Zoe huffed as Michael helped her up from the seat. “You’re a lifesaver Iman,” Camden kissed her cheek as he took Michael’s position and escorted her to T’Challa’s dressing room.

“Yeah, yeah,” she sighed. “How’s the little bean?” Camden asked as they navigated the long hallways of the venue. Zoe smiled and glanced at her little baby bump, “They’re great. Their little heartbeat is easily my favorite thing to hear in the world.”

Camden smiled as she talked about her child. He, like the rest of their friend group, was ecstatic to welcome their new addition. He or she was gonna be everybody's nephew, or niece since Iman insisted it was a little girl. He was also glad that Iman moved on from his friend, he loved T, but the man was too indecisive for his own good. He’d definitely lost a jewel in choosing Nakia over Iman. Not that he didn’t like Nakia, she seemed like a really sweet woman, but T’Challa had so much history with Iman that nothing would be able to replace it. Especially now that they were having a baby.

The A&T alum stopped in front of a suite door and sighed. “This is it,” he reached for the door but paused when Zoe stopped him. “Is my bump, is it noticeable?” She bit her lip and Camden scrunched up his face. “Yeah, but why you trying to hide it?” The nurse's face said it all, “You haven’t told him?”

Camden led Zoe away from the door and into a private corridor. “I knew y’all weren’t on good terms, but Zoe you have to tell him! How would you feel if a girl had my baby and kept it from me?”

“This isn’t the same! T’Challa is a prince. T’Challa is engaged! It’s his wedding day for god's sake. I can’t ruin this day for him!” she whisper yelled. Cam sucked his teeth, “Girl, you know that man would end this whole ceremony for you in a heart-“

“No, no he wouldn’t. This whole image ordeal has changed him. Maybe in college, he would have done that but I’m not what he’s so desperately searching for. Add in a baby and I’m definitely not what he needs anymore. He’ll be fine,” Zoe insisted.

“Look I cannot force you to tell him, but if you do not, I will. And that’s a promise,” Camden cut Zoe off as she opened her mouth. The young mother sighed and walked back over to the door. She knocked twice before letting herself in. “T’Challa?”

The groom looked up as Zoe shut the door behind her. “You came,” his face softened. Zoe took a moment to see how much he’d aged in the past three months. His eyes looked tired and he hadn’t been eating well. He looked like this quarter of a year had been exam week every week. He stood and reached for her hand but she moved away. “You look nice,” she offered, looking him over quickly. “I look like a joke,” the king scoffed. The pair stared at each other in silence. “Am I making the right decision?” The prince asked.

“You’re asking me?” Zoe raised an eyebrow.

“Iman, I always ask for your advice.”

“Yes, but you do realize you’re asking me whether or not you should marry the woman whom you cut me out of your life for right?”

“I-“ the king walked over to the couch and sunk into it. “I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. I feel so lost without you by my side Iman. I want you to be the one wearing white and walking down the aisle at this white wedding-“

“That’s not what I want anymore T’Challa. You threw me away like I meant nothing to you. At her first suggestion, you erased me from your life.”

The future king stood and moved closer to her but Zoe-Iman moved in the opposite direction. “I made a mistake Iman. If I could take it back I would-“

“But you can’t.” She cut him off. “What you fail to understand is that you broke me T’Challa. You strung me along with promises of a relationship for years. Then we started being together physically and there were more promises. Then you broke my heart and didn’t even stay around to make sure it would start beating again. You just vanished, then we had that one night, and I realized I had to protect myself. Which meant leaving you behind. We both made the best decisions for ourselves at that moment. Only one of us regrets it. I want us to just be friends.”

“I can’t just be friends!”

“Well your majesty, that's your decision and your problem,” Zoe shrugged. “But I’m here now,” the prince insisted, “I’ll stay this time. I’m gonna call off this wedding to show you my promises aren’t empty.”

Zoe raised a hand to stop his rambling, “T’Challa stop. Call off this wedding because you don’t love Nakia, not because you want to prove something to me. I have already moved on, or I’m trying to,” she admitted.

“You are with somebody else? Already?”

“We were never together, T'Challa. You made that very clear,” the mother reminded, “You were dating and proposing to other women the whole time we were having sex. So don’t say anything to me about finding someone who is proud to be with me in front of everyone. Someone who loves me out loud. I am happy now, and I want that for you. It just will not be with me.”

“So that is it? There will never be anything between us in any official capacity?”

Zoe fidgeted with her hands, “I wouldn’t say that your majesty,” she rested a hand on her bump.”We will be forever linked.”

“You are pregnant?” His eyes widened as Zoe smoothed out her dress to reveal her bump. The prince looked like tears would fall any second.

“We didn’t use protection that last time in the hotel, and I was switching birth controls. But obviously, I wasn’t thinking about that when I was drunk,” Zoe rambled. “May I?” The king interrupted, gesturing towards her stomach. The nurse nodded and the king bent down running a hand over her bump biting his lip. “Zoe,” he looked up, “I have to marry the mother of my child.”

“T’Challa no,” she stepped back, “We can co-parent but I have found something else worth fighting for. I won’t marry you just because I am having your child.”

“Iman please,” the prince begged, “I can’t lose you and this child on the same day.”

“No T’Challa. Do whatever you feel necessary today, marry Nakia or not, but everyone thought you at least deserved to at least know you were having a child. I did not do this to win you back.”

“And what about you? You were not going to tell me, my love?”

“Don’t call me that,” Zoe replied, purposely ignoring his question. “Zoe-“

“Whatever decision you make about Nakia, it does not matter to me. They just thought you should know so you can decide how or if you want to be in this child’s life.”

The king stood and nodded. “I want to be there, I will be there. But it will take some time, just trust me.”

“You are not making this promise to me, you are making a promise to this child. There is nothing for me to forgive,”

“Ayy, T’Challa we gotta go man. Make a decision!” Camden banged on the door. “Just promise you will forgive me. I need you to promise-“

“What am I forgiving?”

“Just promise me,” T’Challa pleaded as he grabbed his suit jacket, pausing to kiss Zoe’s cheek. “I love you,” he cupped her cheek before hurrying out of the door.

“What’s he gonna do?” Camden asked, walking in and offering her his arm to lead her back to her seat. “I don’t know, but I told him about the baby.”

“And?”

“I truly don’t know. He just said it would take time. Well, he asked me to marry him then when I rejected his offer, he asked me to forgive him and wait for him.”

“Forgive him for what?” Camden asked. “I don’t know,” Zoe glanced at the altar, “but I have a feeling we are about to find out.” She gave Camden a quick hug before re-finding her seat in the venue.

****

“Well that was awkward,” Michael whispered in Zoe’s ear as he helped her settle into her seat at their assigned table. “Stop,” Zoe hit his shoulder fighting off her own laughter. He only offered a grin as he took his own seat next to her. “You feeling okay? You need anything?” The expectant mother shook her head, I’m fine. Just ready to go honestly.”

Michael nodded and wrapped an arm around her shoulder before the master of ceremonies stole their attention. After each member of the bridal party had been introduced came the moment Zoe had been dreading since T’Challa appeared at the altar in the front of the church. “Now presenting, for the very first time, Mr. and Mrs. T’Challa Udaku, Their Royal Highnesses Prince and Princess of Wakanda!” The young married couple processed in and Zoe immediately regretted even showing up. Sensing her distress, Michael wraps her hand in his own and leaned into her ear, “I can’t wait to do that with you. If you’ll let me of course.” Zoe smiled at her boyfriend and bit her lip, “You want me to have your last name?”

“Yeah if you’ll take it,” the actor grinned. Their conversation was interrupted once again by the MC as T’Challa and Nakia headed to the floor for their first dance. As the song cued up Zoe turned back to the actor, “What if I wanna hyphenate?”

“You wanna be Mrs. James-Jordan?” The actor stared. The mother took a moment to think before giggling and shaking her head, “Nah, Mrs. Jordan sounds better.”

“Damn right it does,” Michael pulled her in closer as they broke out into quiet laughter. Across the room, T’Challa’s attention was pulled to the sound of Zoe’s laughter. He never stopped dancing, but his new wife could tell that she’d lost his attention. Not wanting to make a scene, she laid her head back on his chest and sighed, hoping she’d made the right decision in bowing to her father's wishes. Sure she loved T’Challa, but she couldn’t help feeling that his heart belonged to another. He’d been doing well for the last six months leading up to the wedding but all day, it seemed that his attention had been elsewhere and the bride couldn’t help but feel neglected. She snuck a glance at the woman who her husband had been staring at all night. She was here with a man, who seemed to be her significant other. They’d been giggling and sneaking glances the whole day and Nakia found them quite adorable. She hoped that she and T’Challa would get to that point one day, including the slight baby bump she could make out under the woman’s dress. Not because it was overly noticeable, but simply because she’d been longing to see the same bulge on her own form for a few months. As the dance ended, Nakia watched the man lead the mysterious woman out of the main room onto one of the many ballroom balconies. With the couple out of the room, T’Challa’s attention turned back to her and they continued through the reception motions. After receiving her plate of food, Nakia glanced out on the balcony to see the couple slow dancing as the sunset behind them. The boyfriend had the woman’s shoes in his hands as she danced barefoot on the marble tile. She smiled to herself and made a note to try and escape to one with T’Challa before the night was over.

****

“You thought about any names?” Michael murmured as he swayed slowly to Zoe-Iman’s slow dancing playlist. All the Man I Need by Whitney Houston was pouring out of her phone as the two held each other close. “I don’t know, I’ve really only ever thought about girl names to be honest.”

“What do you like for a girl?”

“I’m between Oyne and Ellijay for her first name. But for her middle name, I love Ka’iulani.”

“That’s different,” Michael hummed. “It’s Hawaiian. It means royal sacred one. Kind of ironic given her parentage, but I’ve had it picked out for years.”

“I think it’s beautiful,” Michael pulled back and leaned down to peck her lips. Without her heels, Zoe’s 5’6 frame seemed short compared to his six-foot stature. “You want me to help you think of some boy names,” he offered as the song switched to Blue by Beyoncé. “Maybe, if T’Challa comes around I’d like to let him name it if Lil bean is a boy,” Zoe revealed. “That’s fair,” the star nodded as Zoe returned to her position on his chest, “I’m glad you told him,” Michael smiled. “Yeah, it feels better knowing that he knows.” Zoe agreed. “What made you change your mind?”

“Cam threatened to tell him if I didn’t.” Michael laughed and Zoe fought back a grin of her own. “Cam is always playing the big brother.”

“And he does it well,” Zoe sighed as the song switched to I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston. The couple settled into quiet, Michael placed a kiss on Zoe’s lips as the balcony door further down opened and interrupted their silence. “Oh, I didn’t know that the balconies were all connected,” Nakia apologized once they noticed Michael and Zoe’s music playing. T’Challa eyes were glued to the way Michael was holding Zoe, kicking himself for never dancing with her when she asked.

He recognized this song as one of her favorites and felt his heart crack even more. She was glowing with happiness and he hated that he’d never get to be the reason for it. “It’s alright,” Zoe reassured the new queen, “We should probably go eat anyway.” Zoe looked up at Michael who agreed. “Congratulations, to both of you,” Michael smiled. “You two as well,” Nakia grinned, glancing at Zoe’s tiny bump. “Sorry,” Zoe looked confused before Nakia quickly elaborated, “On the baby,” she gestured and Zoe froze as did T’Challa. If only this poor woman knew, “Oh thank you,” Michael squeezed her hand in reassurance before they grabbed her phone and headed inside.

“I think I’m ready to go,” Zoe sighed. “Aight then. You wanna wait here while I go grab our stuff from the table?” The mother nodded. With a final kiss to her forehead, Michael headed off and someone else caught her attention. “You can not leave without saying hello to your sister,” Shuri grinned. “A smile spread across Zoe’s face at the sight of the princess. The teen pulled her into a quick hug, frowning when she felt the bump, but the Queen mother joined in before she could ask any questions. “ I knew I had been dreaming of fish lately,” she whispered in Zoe’s ear before pulling back from the hug. “Hey,” Michael smiled, confusion lacing his eyes as Zoe stepped back from the queen. “Michael, this is Her Majesty Queen Ramonda, Queen Mother of Wakanda, and Her Royal Highness Shuri Udaku, Princess of Wakanda. T’Challa’s mother and sister. This is Michael B. Jordan, my boyfriend.” Zoe introduced and couldn’t miss the slight frown that ghosted Ramonda’s face. “It is so nice to meet you both,” Michael grinned, kissing both Ramonda and Shuri’s hands.

“It is nice to meet you as well. Are you all leaving?”

Zoe nodded, “Yes, the little one has worn me out for the day.” The Queen chuckled and nodded, “Yes I’m afraid they will drain your energy from now on. We should have lunch though, are you free tomorrow?” Nodding, the queen and Iman scheduled a time and place to meet up. After a quick detour to say hello to the king and goodbye to their friends, the young couple was finally able to escape the party.

You never told me what exactly happened when you went to talk to T’Challa,” Michael traced his fingers leisurely over Zoe’s arms as she lay in between his legs. “Nothing much,” she sighed. “He asked me if he should marry Nakia, and of course I wanted to cuss him out.”

Michael chuckled as Zoe continued, “Once I explained why that question was inappropriate for him to ask me, he finally revealed that he wanted to get back together and I turned him down, told him that I was pregnant, and-“ Zoe hesitated remembering what had happened next. She bit down on her lip as she felt Michael shift below her. “And what?”

“He asked me to marry him and I rejected him,” she finished. “Asked you to marry him?! Is he serious?”

“I don’t know but I flat out told him that it would never happen, I had something else worth fighting for and I wasn’t just gonna leave it behind,” she smiled up at him. “Damn right, I’m not giving you up without a fight, but are you sure it’s not a law or something?”

Zoe frowned, “I hadn’t thought about it but he’s gonna have to figure it out. Either that or I’m having two husbands.” Michael scoffed as Zoe died of laughter, “Nah, once you Mrs. Michael B Jordan I am not sharing you with anyone but Lil bean.”

*****

“And T’Challa knows about this?” King T’Chaka frowned. The royal family and Zari had been enjoying a rather peaceful lunch as Zari caught them up to speed about what had been going on for the almost two years since her visit to Wakanda. “Yes sir, I told him yesterday.”

“Yesterday? And he still married Nakia?” Shuri exclaimed. “Not that I don’t like her,” Shuri clarified under her parent’s stare. “Why did you wait so late to tell him, sweet girl?” Ramonda frowned.

Zari looked up confused, “T’Challa cut me out of his life about four months ago. Yesterday was the first time I’d seen him since then.”

“He told us that he was talking to you often.”

The mother shook her head, “I think Nakia got suspicious of how close we were and he blocked me on everything.”

“How did this happen then?” The king gestured at her bump. Zoe felt the blood rush to her face, “One day we saw each other in passing and he convinced me that he was ready to make our relationship official with you all-“

“So when you came to visit, there was something going on between the both of you?” Ramonda interrupted.

“Yes ma’am. T’Challa insisted it stay a secret-“

“Because he thought I would not approve?” Zoe nodded and the aging king sighed. “Dear girl I- We- have all always approved of you. In T’Challa’s younger years I was very adamant about him not marrying an outsider, but we all mellow with age.” The king and Zoe laughed, “I want you to know, and I believe I speak for everyone when I say, that we are all overjoyed at welcoming a new member of our family.”

Zoe teared up as Shuri, the king, and the queen all reached for her hands. “I’m sorry, I've been a bit of an emotional mess recently.”

“Totally understandable, it will only get worse as they get older.” Ramonda smiled. “Well let's celebrate!” The king clapped, “if I recall correctly, Raspberry Cheesecake is your favorite dessert?” The king smiled. Zoe-Iman wiped her eyes as a laugh tumbled out from her lips. “Yes, your majesty.”

“Please! No formalities before and none required now. You are carrying my first grandchild. Father or baba is fine with me if it is fine with you,” the older man smiled before ordering a raspberry cheesecake to be brought to the table.

***

“So, who was the girl from yesterday?” Nakia rubbed the last of the coconut oil on her hands into her skin before placing the lid back on the jar. “Who?” T’Challa asked, walking out of the closet buttoning the second to last button on his shirt. “The girl from the balcony. You were staring at her and her boyfriend the whole night.” Nakia stood and shrugged out of her robe to step into her outfit for the day. “Oh, you mean Zari? I wasn’t staring at her,” the prince replied, sliding into his shoes. He watched as his new wife slipped her dress over her form and turned so he could zip it up for her.

Nakia laughs, “T’Challa you were staring so hard I’m surprised the poor girl didn’t have a hole burned through her head.” The woman turned to smooth his shirt and smiled up at the frowning prince. “Aren’t wives usually upset about things like this?”

“Should I be?” Nakia suddenly frowned. “No, but it just seems like you wouldn’t like the idea of me staring at another woman.”

Nakia stepped away to slip into her shoes. “Well, I wasn’t, but you are starting to make me feel like I should be upset. She had a boyfriend, who she’s expecting a baby with. I assumed she was just a friend you had not seen in a while. Besides, you married me so I hoped I had nothing to worry about.” She grabbed her purse before turning back to her husband. “You do not have anything to worry about. She is, was, a really close friend at one point she was more than a friend.” The newly married man admitted.

“How recently was this, we’ve only been dating for a little while,” Nakia raised her eyebrow. “She was the girl whose number I deleted,” the prince sighed. Nakia set her purse down and wiped a hand over her face. “T’Challa, be honest with me. Is there any chance that the baby could be yours?”

T’Challa cleared his throat, “We will be late-”

“Do not ignore me T’Challa! I am your wife, no matter how much I am regretting this expedited engagement.”

“The child is mine.”

Nakia nodded, “And just when were you going to tell me? When the child was born and you suddenly have an heir who did not come from my womb!”

“I just found out yesterday!”

“Do your parents know?”

“I am not sure,” the future king sighed. “Then we need to tell them today, at brunch.” Nakia grabbed her clutch and walked out before turning around. “And do not even think about returning to the same bed as me tonight.”

***

Michael: I’m outside when you are ready love

Zoe-Iman smiled at the text message that dinged across her screen. She finished the last bite of her cheesecake and looked up at the family. “I really hate to leave, but I have a doctor’s appointment to get to.”

“You’re not driving, are you? We can have someone take you if you’d like?” Ramonda offered, concerned at the thought of the pregnant woman driving alone. Iman stood from the table and the rest of the family followed, “No, Michael is outside waiting to take me.”

“Good,” King T’Chaka smiled, “He sounds like a keeper.” the older man winked. “I think he is,” Zoe laughed.”Next time, you bring him to lunch as well. We want to meet him.” Ramonda grinned. “I’ll let him know,” Zari promised, “It all works out because you all have crazy schedules, we’ll schedule it ahead of time.”

“You got my American number right? So we can facetime?” Shuri double-checked. “Got it,” Zari reassured showing her where the number was saved in her phone as ‘little sister’. “When you call please make sure you talk to us as well. I wanna know everything,” Ramonda reminded Zoe and laughed.

“I promise, I’ll text Shuri an update after my appointment. Can you all make sure T’Challa receives them as well, we still don’t have any contact.”

The monarchs frowned before T’Chaka nodded, “I’ll talk to him about that as well. For now, we will make sure the messages get passed along.” Each member of the family pulled Zoe in for a hug, Ramonda pressing a kiss to her forehead before letting the girl go. She waved goodbye as some of the waitstaff cleared and replaced their table settings. Glancing down to text Michael back she walked into someone before realizing it was the prince himself, with his new wife. Nakia glanced at her husband before offering Zoe a tight smile. “Your highnesses,” Zoe-Iman bowed her head in respect. Nakia bowed her head in return, “I don’t believe we’ve officially met. I’m Zoe-Iman, but you can call me Zoe.”

“Nice to meet you,” Nakia replied, wishing that she didn’t know what she knew. “What are you doing here?” T’Challa asked. “I- your mother, she invited me to brunch, to catch up.”

“You’re already leaving?”

“I have a doctor’s appointment-”

“Is everything okay?” T’Challa interrupted looking panicked. “Yes, it's just my bi-weekly check-up.”

“You’re going alone?” Nakia interjected, not wanting T’Challa to go, but understanding she had absolutely nothing to resent this woman for. “No, my boyfriend Michael is waiting outside,” Zoe glanced at her phone that held several missed text messages, “And he’s freaking out slightly so I should probably get going. It was nice to see you both. I’ll send any news to Shuri if you’d like to hear what happens,” the expecting mother glanced up at the king. He only nodded in reply before Zoe took her cue and hightailed it out of the door.

****

“Mrs. Jordan?” the nurse called and Michael nudged his girlfriend to stand up. “You think you’re slick don’t you?” Zoe laughed as he helped her out of her seat. “Manifestation,” he winked as she slightly waddled over to the smiling woman. “Zoe-Iman you didn’t tell me you’d gotten married?!” Kenisha gasped as she led her coworker to the back. “I didn’t,” the mother rolled her eyes and hugged her friend, “Michael’s trying to be funny.”

The actor had become well known to many of the women in the office, even before he officially started dating Zoe. He’d always show up waiting to take her out to lunch, or bring her lunch on days he knew she couldn’t step away or he didn’t have much free time. “A test run huh?” she wiggled her eyebrows at Michael as he helped Zoe onto the scale. “You better believe it. It sounds good too doesn’t it?”

Kenisha laughed,” That it does. Sylia will be in in a minute. She just got back from the hospital.”

“What happened?” Zoe asked as she waddled behind the nurse into the exam room and Michael helped her onto the bed. “Girl, Peggy Johnson almost went into labor when her husband did one of them tik tok pranks on her. You know sis pregnant with her second set of twins. He needs to sit himself down somewhere. That poor woman do so much as sneeze them babies gon come flying out.” Kenisha shook her head as Zoe laughed. “Sylia just said they were Braxton-Hicks though, but I think they’re gonna keep her overnight just in case.”

Zoe nodded, “Yeah, you know twins tend to come early. Bless her heart, I couldn’t do it. I can’t imagine pushing two babies out at once. I would like my body back after this is said and done.”

Kenisha nodded as she finished setting up the room, “Yep, and this is her second set! She said at the last appointment she wants them tubes tied, sniped, and cauterized.”

“Who can blame her,” Zoe laughed. “You're not getting your tubes tied are you?” Michael rubbed his thumb in circles over Zoe’s hand. “Why? You want your chance to knock me up?” Zoe laughed but Michael nodded seriously. “At least once. I know you are already gonna have this baby, who I love as my own, but I would like a little you or me running around hopefully.”

Zoe nodded. “I know, I wasn’t going to tie them anyway. I want at least three kids.”

“Aww y’all are so cute, “Kenisha gushed before raising the ready colored marker outside of the door and heading off.

“Hey, mama!” Sylia grinned as she walked into the room a few seconds later, rubbing in her hand sanitizer. “Hey Syl,” Zoe laughed. Sylia hugged her friend and Michael before scooting over on her rolling stool. “Well, if you’ll lift your shirt, we’ll get started with the ultrasound. I live with you so no need to go over the diet and medicine formalities. Just let me know if something feels off.” Zoe nodded as the machine whirred to life and Sylia prepped her stomach with the clear cold gel. Michael pulled Zoe’s hand into his lips and pressed a kiss to it as the heartbeat filled the room. Sylia frowned at the screen before moving the wand closer to the top of Iman’s stomach. Zoe felt her stomach drop as two heartbeats filled the room.

“Why is it echoing? Michael looked between the two women. “Bakari, that’s not an echo. Zoe is having twins.”

Taglist: @almostpurelysmut @blackbypurpose @tchoking @sisterwifeudaku @wikiwakanda @royallyprincesslilly @90sinspiredgirl @thedelightfulone @autumn242 @purple-apricots @kumkaniudaku @queertrex @kaciidubs @halfrican-heat @skysynclair19 @dramaqueenamby @gorjiss @leahnicole1219 @kreolemami @mzbritt @derangedcupcake @chaneajoyyy @lalapalooza718 @ororowrites @leahnicole1219 @sarcastic-sunshines @sarahboseman @faatassbitch @lady-love-and-glitter-roses @cxnismajcr @tchallasbabymama

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kooktaebear · 3 years

Text

If Only I Knew

Status: ONGOING (this is my first AU AHHH I’m excited to write the next couple of parts, but I hope this story gets a lot of love :~>)

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Summary: Y/N abruptly moved to Seoul after spending 21 years living alone in her hometown, Busan after the death of her parents. She now discovers through her best friends that drama can be a lot to handle, but as she starts to meet new people, she discovers that she had completely forgotten an important part of her past.

Warnings: mention of guns, blood and violence,

Genre: angst, WHOLE LOT OF FLUFF, slow burn

Word Count: 3.2k

Part One:

I step out of the bus and a gust of cold wind hits my face as I board the train. Why did I think of not wearing enough layers in the middle of winter? I take my seat and look out the window to see the number of people who are about to board the train. I grab my phone and start listening to ILYSB. I like LANY, their music is perfect for travel.

I know this isn't such an interesting event in my life since I know that many other people have flown to see Seoul, capital of Korea but hey, give me a break. I’m finally going to meet my best friends after living alone for 4 years. This is what pays to be travelling, a provincial girl like me? I doubt I would ever survive the city life.

As a 2 hours pass, I wake up to hear the advisory that I’m about to reach Seoul.

I look out the window, close my eyes, and whisper.

"Mom, Dad, I made it to Seoul."

I lost both my parents during a hostage that happened in our own home. My mom happened to answer the door and was shot first. The culprit saw me and asked me to go get my dad. At first I was confused, but it so happened that there was an issue with the family business and this guy was after the money. I was 13 at that time but I still couldn't figure out why something like this had to happen to our family. However, as soon as my dad had agreed to the terms of the killer, he pointed his gun at me and pulled the trigger. I closed my eyes to prepare myself for the pain that comes next but instead, I felt warm liquid on my hands and felt something heavy fall on me, it was my dad. I screamed at the sight of both my parents suddenly vanishing from this world, a sudden pain struck my chest and I couldn't breathe. I fall to the ground slowly losing my vision as I see the blue and red lights of police cars approaching my house.

"Miss? Are you okay miss?" the person right next to me calls my attention and brings me back to reality, "Oh, yes I'm fine. Have we arrived?" I look around to see almost everyone out of the train. "Would you need any help getting off? Are you new to the city?" the lady asks me. I shake my head and give her a smile as I head down the aisle to the exit.

I follow the rest of the passengers to exit the station as I turn my phone on to contact Jennie and Lisa, my two best friends. Their parents had offered to get us three an apartment we could all share just so that they could both keep me company. Lisa and Jennie aren't sisters if you were wondering, they just had agreed to live under one roof with me and I'm eternally grateful for that. Not to mention they’re idol trainees.

"Y/N?" I turn my head to see Lisa's straight black hair, "Lisa!!!" We both jump around and giggle, "Wait but where's Jennie?" "Oh, she's getting us another cab because your arrival got delayed." She helps grab my luggage and we both start catching up with each other, as if we’ve never spoken in weeks. This was the first time I had ever seen both Lisa and Jennie in person, all our moms were best friends when they were younger too but since we couldn't visit them often, we met and talked through video calls.

"Well if it isn't our beautiful foreign friend Y/N." I turn around and meet Jennie’s eyes, "JENNIE!!!" I run to hug her and Lisa joins in and I finally don't feel alone anymore. "Girls, the cab is waiting outside, we better hurry." On our way to our new apartment we were all catching up with each other as if we really didn't talk as much already. "Oh hey, Y/N you have to make sure that you're ready to go to school by 7am okay?" Jennie cheerfully said. I was so confused, school started at 8am so why would I have to be ready an hour before school when our place was literally like 10 minutes away. "Wait why do we have to be ready an hour before school? I know our place is like 15 minutes away from school. It's not like you guys take that long to fix yourselves up right?" Lisa and Jennie smiled at me suspiciously, "Well....Y/N you know, you may not know everything about us yet..." "What's there not to know? I've known you guys since the moment I was able to talk." Lisa elbowed me softly, "We’ve got new friends! Like actual men type of friends." My eyes opened wide despite the tiredness I've been experiencing,

How could these two end up befriending guys and just suddenly "forgetting" to tell me about it when they know and are fully aware that we all don’t normally interact with the opposite gender?

"Fine, I'll be ready by 7am on Monday." I say as I roll my eyes, "YAYYY I'M SO EXCITEDDD!!!" both of them scream.

Ugh, 30 minutes have just passed since I arrived in Seoul and I'm already experiencing stress.

As soon as we got off the cab, both my friends had rushed to bring down all my belongings so that I could finally take a look at the place we rented out. Jennie reaches her hand out to me and in her palm, my key to our place. "Hey, have you guys figured out how we'll be getting to school on Monday?" Jennie giggles, "Y/N, you’re lucky we attend the same school. But the guys will pick us up! Plus..they promised to bring Jungkook." Jennie winks at me and flashes me her brightest smile.

Jungkook? I know I've heard that name somewhere, but I just can't remember where.

"We're here!!" The elevator door opens, "Apartment 735" I mutter to myself. I walk along the brightly lit corridor. "732....733...734..." I continue counting, "735!!" The girls rush to my side, "Y/N, this is your first time in our apartment, so you'll have the honor of opening the door with your key" Lisa says with a smile. I reach out for my keys, close my eyes and take a deep breath before turning the key to unlock the door. I hear the light switch turn on and I open my eyes. The apartment was beautiful. I walk in to see the kitchen, it has a small island where I could serve meals to my friends. I honestly enjoy cooking to relieve myself from whatever stresses me out, whether it be school, people or something about football. I’ve loved sports for as long as I can remember but it gets frustrating since I could be quite competitive.

I walked into the next room and I saw our living room, there was a large L-shaped sofa sitting in front of a huge television. In between the sofa and TV, I saw a small wooden table that is most probably multipurpose as being both a study desk and a place to put our snacks when we binge on shows during our free days. Beside the sofa I see a balcony that showcases a beautiful scenery of the city. I walk out and feel the cold breeze on my cheeks, I look up to the sky and I see that the sky had a welcoming gift for me as well. The stars greeted me as they shined brightly upon the night sky and I just can't help but admire the night sky. To my right, I see a bean bag that fits 2 people. I plop down to the bean bag and stargaze for a while.

Mom? Dad? I know you can hear me, I promise I'll make you proud, I'll succeed here in Seoul and become a great doctor.

"Y/N?" I snap back to reality and see Jennie’s head appear, "You haven't even seen your room yet! Come onnnnn!!" I stand back up and follow the girls in another small hallway, there I see 3 doors. "So basically, it's not that we don't want you to have your own room but we wanted one room to be our sort of walk-in closet because I mean who has not dreamed of having one?" I open the first door I see and the place is indeed full of clothes. There were 3 closets in the room, each of the closet doors have our first name initials on it to indicate who owns which closet. I laugh at my best friends, we all enjoy watching all those Barbie movies where they have spectacular closets and I guess you can say that this is the closest we can get to our childhood dreams.

I walk out of the room and take a few steps into the hallway. Lisa rushes to get past me and hold the doorknob, "Okay Y/N, this room is a little different. I know it's not really our style whatsoever but we created a study room." I scrunch my eyebrows, "A study room? Really now? For all of us or for me?" Lisa tucks a stray hair into her ear, "Well, more for you than for us since we know how hard you work and how much more you'll be working to get into med school. But it's a double purpose for a practice room for us too!" I take a step back to look at both my best friends and their grinning faces,

What did I do to deserve these two psychos in my life?

I call them in for a group hug, "You guys, I know you want to make me feel like there's nothing missing anymore in my life and I love you guys for that. I hope you all still remember I'm not a robot though and even if I'll be working hard to get into med school, I'll still be around to party and experience what any normal teenager should be experiencing." I hear Jennie sniffling at my right, "Aw Jen" I rub her back soothingly, "We know that Y/N, we just want the best for you too. We'll always be here rooting for you any time." We all take a step back, "Okay!" Lisa says, "Guys, it's our first night in our own apartment and we're already crying." Everybody laughs, "So I guess this last room is our room?" "It sure is." Jennie opens the door and I see three twin beds side by side. Just like our "walk-in closet" our first name initials are hanging above our head, brightly lit to recognize who owns which bed. I see my initial on top of the bed that lies in between both Lisa and Jennie's.

I drop my luggage off at our closet area and plop back down into the bean bag on the balcony. I take a deep breath in and close my eyes.

This is the start of my new life.

------------------------------------------------------------------

"Take my hands now, you are the cause of my euphoria"

I woke up to the sound of Euphoria, my favorite song in the whole wide-

"WHEN I’M WITH YOU I'M IN UTOPIA"

And of course, the voices of my two best friends singing their hearts out and getting the lyrics messed up.

"Y/N!!! Come on!! It's your first day of school. Did you forget about our breakfast plan?"

Right. Their so-called "breakfast plan" before school. I stand up from my bed and stretch a little before I start making my bed. I stop by the closet first and pick my outfit for today, I pick out a tied crop top, white sneakers, and jeans. I grab my bathrobe and head to the bathroom. I step into the shower and play some music that would help wake me up and get ready for the day. As I continue to wash my hair, I hear a knock on my door,

"Y/N! Are you done?!!"

I roll my eyes. Jeez, they finally got themselves guy friends and now they're going crazy about finishing on time. I wrap a towel around my head to dry my hair. I head back to our dressing room and open my luggage. As I look for my blow dryer and straightener, Lisa barges into the room,

"Y/N Y/L/N, you seem to be too relaxed this morning. You have 30 minutes left to get ready and if you're not ready by then I'm going to drag you to the car." "Don't worry Jen, I'll be done on time. Now can you please stop bothering me so that I can start dressing up?"

I quickly blow dry my hair and put it up in a messy bun. With the remaining time left, this is the best I can do to tame my natural curls. I look at myself in the mirror and check to see if something is missing. I reach out to get my makeup bag and I put on a little blush and add a little lip tint. I search through my accessory bag and look for my small stud earrings. I get my glasses from the table and look at myself in the mirror once more. I'm ready for my first day of school. I leave the dressing room and meet my best friends in our kitchen.

"Oh my goodness Y/N, let's go! We're already 5 minutes late." I grab the schoolbag I prepared last night before heading to bed and leave the apartment. We head to the basement by elevator since Lisa got her license just recently. "Wait Lisa, if you had your license already by the time you picked me up, why did you guys use a taxi to pick me up?" "Oh, uh..I was too lazy to drive that late at night so I just got us a taxi." She starts the car and we head to the exit.

It was my first time ever seeing Seoul in the morning light, the sun hit the skyscrapers so beautifully that it was as if the city was welcoming me as their new citizen. Numerous cars were already out by the time we hit the road because of the rush hour most of them were experiencing. Our school, Seoul National University was just 10 minutes away, our apartment was located a couple blocks away As I was looking out the window, I saw some sort of diner come into view. It looked huge for my definition of a diner since I always saw diners as small joints made for meals, but this diner was different. As Lisa pulled up in the parking area I could see a little bit of the inside, students like us were dining in there as well and there seemed to be a game room on the other side of the dining area. It's around mid-February so the breeze was still cool, Busan was a little warmer during the winter so I had to find a way to adjust to the cooler weather in the city. As my friends and I make our way to the entrance, I notice three heads that turn our way. As we enter the diner however, the smell of freshly made bread, waffles, and eggs hits me and I feel my mouth water. I've been starving and I couldn't wait to try whatever the diner had been serving.

I see three boys in a booth and I make eye contact with one of them, the weird thing is...I felt butterflies in my tummy. I've seen those eyes somewhere, he feels familiar which is of course impossible because I've never met these people in my entire life.

I've never had any guy friends at all. I've always thought about making my parents proud and everything so I focused on getting good scores on all my tests so that I could get into med school. This is all so new to me...having friends of the opposite species. I mean okay, I've watched rom-coms and movies that revolve around love, seeing your friends being treated the way I see couples act in the movies is something I never thought I would be interacting with boys at this point of my life.

"Y/N? Earth to Y/N!" I snap back to reality as Jennie calls my attention. "This is Jimin, Taehyung and the guy still sitting in the booth is Jungkook." Jungkook? I think I know a Jungkook from back home but it's still pretty hard to remember a lot of things. "Sorry, I'm being rude." Jungkook stood up and walked to me, "Jungkook." He held out a hand for me to shake, "Y/N." I say in reply. As our hands touch, there's a familiar warmth that gives me goosebumps. I quickly try to mask the reddness in my cheeks. We all take a seat in the booth and based on the impression of these boys, they seem like athletes. "Hey Y/N," Jimin says, "You should try their Bacon and Waffles here. They sell out like crazy in the mornings." I take a quick glance on the menu and scan quickly for the meal Jimin was talking about. I raise my hand excitedly to call in the waitress to take our orders, "1 Bacon and Waffles, 2 Pancakes and, 3 orders of the Waffles and Chicken all with Orange Juice on the side." The waitress says, "Thanks." I give her a smile in return.

I glance back at my friends after giving the waitress the menu I was holding, Jungkook and I make direct eye contact, his big brown doe eyes, another flood of goosebumps crawl on my skin as he turns away to talk to Taehyung. Why is it that Jungkook looks at me as if he’s seen me before?

The waitress returns with the orders and I start to take a bite off my first meal of the day.

“So Y/N, how was your first night in the city?” Taehyung asked as he picked a strawberry off one of the pancakes, “I stayed up in the balcony just looking at the city lights, the stars were very bright last night. I couldn’t stay up for so long though, it got really cold.” “Y/N loves gazing at stars, she used to try to make Jen and I see the stars in Busan every time we video called.” Lisa says giggling, Jimin gasps and turns to point at Jungkook while eating his waffle, “Jungkook used to drag us out of our homes just to meet at a park to stargaze!” Jungkook shyly looks away and takes a sip of his juice, “Yah” he finally speaks, “You make me sound like a really weird kid Hyung” I laugh at his statement, “Don’t be too embarrassed Kook, looking at the stars are my favorite past time” He tenses up with the nickname as he looks at me, I realize I just gave this guy a nickname on the first day we met. Shit. “Uh, is it okay that I call you Kook?” He nods in return as a smile crept onto his face.

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handonhaven · 3 years

Note

You know how annoying and sad it is to see that H*sies are trying to say that Handons are getting out of control. How are we getting out of control? I know in every ship fandom there can be a few bad eggs. I just haven't seen any bad Handons out there yet. And if there are any, its nothing compare to H*sies in my opinion. Like they literally bully Danielle and Aria. They want to try to get Aria fired. Or get mad because Hope's doesn't act like a mikealson but when she does they complain about that. Or they say thats not the real Landon because "he's being useful" or "he's actually being a decent boyfriend for once" and so on. I know there's a lot theories about Landon and the prison world/ artifact thing that could be true. But it's their reasoning for why it's not him that doesn't make sense. Like Landon wasn't already a great boyfriend and really helpful.

I'm not trying to start something or anything. But I just don't understand it. How are we out of control???

Wait, they’re saying that?? That’s so ironic coming from them. Exactly, how are we getting out of control? Like, we’re just enjoying our ship? Yeah, there will always be those kinds of people in any fandom, and I’ve seen a few bad Handons, but it’s pretty rare. Most Handon fans seem pretty nice. The H*sie fandom, on the other hand, is full of bullies and they’ve literally gotten so out of control that it’s been acknowledged by the cast and the writers, to the point that they’ve had to deliberately not have any interactions between Hope and Josie to try to get those fans to calm down. And then those fans are wondering why there hasn’t been any H*sie content and are trying to come up with all these theories to explain why Hope is so “ooc” and why they aren’t talking to each other when their own behavior is the reason why. Like, even I think it’s weird that Hope and Josie have only had one interaction in half a season, but it goes to show that the writers thought the fandom was bad enough that they felt the need to do that.

And exactly, H*sies not only bully other fans, but also Danielle and Aria. I know Danielle has gotten a lot of crap recently, not sure how much of it came from H*sies because I know it was coming from others outside the fandom too. But Aria has especially gotten hate from H*sies for a long time. They claim to love Aria even though they hate Landon, yet they made that petition, have attacked him on his Instagram, insult and pick apart his looks, among other things... it’s so messed up.

And yeah, they’ve been complaining about pretty much everything that has to do with Hope and Landon, as usual. Hope acts like a Mikaelson, but because it’s about Landon, she’s ooc and a terrible person and her family would be ashamed of her. And the crap they say about Landon too... Landon has been that way this whole time. You’re so right, he was already an amazing boyfriend and has always been useful and helpful since the beginning. They’re clearly not watching the show, or it shows just how biased they are towards the “real” Landon. And true, some of the theories about him not being fully Landon or him being split could be correct, but the Landon we’ve seen has still been acting just like Landon for the most part. There have been a few little things I’ve noticed that seemed different, but nothing to do with how useful he is or how he treats Hope, so that’s ridiculous.

But I totally get where you’re coming from. They behave the way they do then call us out of control? I think most of us are just here to love Handon and watch their journey and interact with other Handon fans, why is that a problem? They’re clearly just making up stuff again (are we surprised?) to try to attack Handon and the fans some more. I don’t understand it either and I don’t think I ever will. Their way of thinking and their behavior is just... it’s really something else.

#answered #it sounds exhausting #like are they ok?#don’t think so #their arms must be so tired from all the reaching

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crownin-thestars · 4 years

Text

There's a Reason Why

You know who Mega is, right? Everyone knows him as that one mute kid, but they don't know why he's mute and they don't seem to care.

But Mega wasn't always like this

Mega was usually a quiet kid around children his age and older, being quite shy and was always teased for his birthmark location. When he was around those younger, he would usually come off as a bit of a bully because of what he says to them. The only reason he did that was to get rid of stress from both school AND home.

His household was even more stressful, having a single mother and being her only child. His father had filed a divorce agreement but was unable to gain custody over Mega due to his mother presenting false cases. This resulted in, of course, Mega living under his mother's roof.

False cases? His mother sounds like the scummiest scumbag in the world, and I can assure you that that may or may not be true. The reason she wanted custody over Mega was because she was never able to reach her own goals, and with a child, she wanted him to achieve them for her. She never cared about what he wanted to do, all she cares about was that her son absolutely needed to become what she expected him to be.

This woman forced her son to be a perfect child. All A stars in school, always obedient at home and always helped her with housework. (For the record, I don't exactly know how grades work in America, an A star is the highest grade you can get on an exam in my country and a U as the lowest, standing for ungraded so I might go by that)

When Mega had told her he wanted to create content, this set her off. His mother yelled at him, so much that it brought him to tears. He was never yelled at like that for so long, the words that came out her mouth sounded like they were came from another. Mega heard things like 'You were a mistake after all' and 'why can't you let me make you great'. He didn't want to hear anymore of it, running off to his room and locking the door.

Mega's mother thought he had changed his mind, yeah that's how entitled she is, but she soon found out that she was very wrong.

Mega had come home one day on his phone. He wasn't even in the house for a minute when his phone was snatched out of his hands. He was slammed into the wall, causing a few things on the shelf next to him to fall. His mother asked him what he had been doing when he hid in his room.

Nervous, he stuttered out a 'nothing', flinching as his mother raised her arm. She screamed at him for being a lier, and told him that she had been keeping track of who and what he was texting. Mega could feel his blood go cold. Knowing who he was texting would mean her knowing what he was planning, and considering what had happened just a few days ago, he already knew she would not react well.

Mega managed to break free from his mother's vice like grip, snatching his phone back before bolting to his room. The slammed the door shut, locking it. Loud banging and screaming coul be heard behind the door. No matter how much she screamed, he wouldn't break the only barrier he had between him and his mother.

He leaned back on the wall opposite the door, his body sliding down as tears fell from his eyes. He grasped his arms around his head, trying to keep the bad noises out. Mega whispered to himself through the sobs as the banging continued. Why did love feel this painful?

Mega had come home from a long day at school. He entered his home, expecting a greeting from his mother. Nothing was said. He quickly checked the kitchen and her room, no one was in there. Mega smiled to himself. He had the home to himself till she came back! It was still noon, so he had just hoped that his mother would only come back in the evening.

Mega enjoyed the hours he was alone, not having his mother there to tell him off. He had played a few games on his phone and watched many, many videos on YouTube. In the middle of watching another video, he looked up to check his clock. It was already late at night and she hasn't come home yet.

He was confused, getting up from his bed. His mind was interrupted by a wave of pain in his stomach. I haven't had dinner. He thought, making his way to the kitchen. Mega looked in the fridge, no leftovers from the night before. That's fine, leftovers aren't the best of foods to eat. He opened up the shelves, only finding a few cans of soup and some instant cup noodles. Guess the noodles would have to do.

It was the next day, had to be a school day of course. Mega did his usual morning routine, the only thing different was that. . . His mom still wasn't home?

He sighed, going around the house to find some cash to bring along with him. He opened drawers and looked under beds. There wasn't a single penny in the whole place. He looked over at his piggy bank, a sort of last resort. He went to pick it up and shook it, sighing with relief when he heard the sound of coined crashing against the metal casing. This money he saved was meant to be a little bank account for the things that he might have wanted. Removing the little cork at the bottom, he shook the money out, it was just enough for the bus rides to school and back for about two to three days.

He grabbed the money, shoving it in his pocket. Time to get to school.

~Smol timeskip cuz again idk how America schooling systems work~

On the bus ride home, he had attempted to contact his mother, ending with it hanging up immediately. Staying on his own was an intimidating thought, and he wanted to know when she would be coming home.

He entered his home. Mother isn't home again. This time, he wasn't happy. He has never been isolated by himself like this before. That's fine. . . I'm fine. . . He assured himself. His mother was gonna come home at some point. Right?

It had been a few days since Mega had seen his mother, or had an actual interaction with someone. How many days? He had lost track. He wasn't able to go to school anymore because he didn't have money to take the bus. Mega could feel himself losing a bit of his sanity, but it was kept intact with the texting of his online friend. The house was in a bit of a mess, and at this point he didn't bother to take care of it. He couldn't tell if he missed his mother or not, the only feeling inside him being. . . Almost nothing. He kept on reassuring himself, making sure he doesn't do anything stupid.

That's fine. . . Uh oh- A noise was heard from outside the house. He couldn't tell if it was a wild animal, a burglar or his mother. Not taking any chances, he went to hide away. Mega bit his lip, afraid to make any noise whatsoever. Hearing footsteps entering the apartment made his heart beat rapidly. He peaked out of his hiding place to have a look at what was happening. He saw two adults, one woman and one man, possibly a couple, looking at the small mess of a home.

Mega must have peaked out for too long, the woman feeling something watching. She turned to where he was looking out from and saw Mega. Scared, he quickly hid away. He heard soft whispers as the sound of the trespassers footsteps was getting closer. Tears had started to drip down as the footsteps got louder and louder. Mega bit on his lip harder, trying his best to not let the crying overpower him. He knew they've found him, he knew he couldn't do anything. So he just sat there in fear.

They'll hurt you. He thought. That's all people do to you.

Mega looked up, taking in the new faces in front of him. His fear immediately caught up to him as tears burst out. He quickly tried to hide his face, trying not to show weakness. (I mean like he's 7 cut him some slack-)

He heard some sort of packaging open as a small scent of cookies filled the area. He peaked up and saw that the woman was offering him the delicacies. He accepted them with gratitude as he started munching on them. They reminded him of how his father made them when they were still together. . .

The man came to sit down next to the young, scrappy and hungry child, ruffling his hair a little bit as the woman knelt down in front of him with a smile. Mega cherished the company he had around him, softly chewing on the chocolate chip cookies given.

This was the most loved he has felt in so long. . .

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Word Count: 1621 words

HAHA I'M FINALLY DONE WITH THIS!! Bro I ran out of words to write at the part where the couple came into the house, so the ending might have sucked a bit, but I still quite like that ending.

Also watched Hamilfilm recently, currently obsessing over the songs, hence that Hamilton reference I put in there.

Also yes I made a 7 year old smart as heck because why not? Dream was able to connect his computer to his neighbor's electricity when he was 15 so it's possible to be overly smart at a young age.

Side note that these are the very same people that decided to take care of him and help him grow up.

Side note #2 if you haven't guessed it yet the issue I was wanting to raise awareness about is child abandonment. I don't know how well I did with writing this because I consider myself to be a privelaged child.

#minecraft #mcyt #mcyters #headcanon #megapvp #fanfic #fanfiction #tw: childhood trauma #tw: child abandonment #tw: mental health #since i cant draft it im posting it now

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ohcaptaintarthister · 5 years

Text

The Assassination of Jaime Lannister*

Rant contains spoilers of Season 8 Episode 4 of Game of Thrones. Look away if you haven't seen it.

Right. Here we go.

I did not read the series A Song of Ice and Fire (ASOIAF) until Season 5 of Game of Thrones. Fantasy is not my favorite genre. Besides these books by George RR Martin, the only fantasy novel I've read was The Eyes of the Dragon by Stephen King.

I was drawn to the books because of the show. They're not easy to read. Besides being thick enough to actually hurt someone with it, I read them with zero ideas about the conventions of fantasy, the worldling and so on. I was curious and wanted to see. Also, Season 5 took too long. After a weekend where I binged on Seasons 1 to 4, I needed to know about the books.

The wait for Season 5 was reason one. Curiosity the second. The third was I have fallen in love with Jaime Lannister and Brienne of Tarth. Yes. I was in love with them as a pair. They are my favorite characters.

Back then I had no idea what shipping meant, and what fandoms were. But I knew I had to see if the chemistry of Jaime and Brienne in the show, awesomely played by Nikolaj Coster-Waldau and Gwendoline Christie, resulted from casting and adaptation or if the characters' interactions sizzled in the books. In other words, and this is vocabulary I picked up once I began wading deeper into the fandom, I was curious if it was canon.

And it was!

On their own and together, Jaime and Brienne were written with nuanced complexity. Jaime, especially, seemed sketched to cover the entire spectrum of gray and other unknown shades of it. Readers and show-onlys went from wishing this guy Seven Hells for throwing a ten-year-old child from a window to cheering him on as he found himself, often with great reluctance at first, on a path to redemption. Because Jaime, once separated from his family--the continuing disapproval of his father Tywin because he was nothing more than a glorified bodyguard and the quicksand relationship with twin sister Cersei--was finally free to be a man on his own. It did not matter that he was one of the greatest sword fighters, that he was a Lannister and Kingsguard. Robb Stark's army captured him because he was leading the Lannister armies. He lost his hand for thinking being a Lannister gave him protection and privilege. One-handed and probably still fevered, he jumped into the bear pit to rescue Brienne of Tarth. And before that, he saved her from being raped too.

As all that Jaime had been was gradually stripped away to reveal a man who murdered his king to protect the people yet one who loved his sister without guilt, Brienne was there in the picture of him being rendered anew. Honestly, because of Brienne, I swung to Team Jaime. Possibly with pom-poms too.

But after reading the books and seeing some episodes again, I began to wonder if David Benioff and D.B. Weiss hated the character.

While in the books Jaime said, "The things we do for love" WITH LOATHING, in the show he said the line with a smirk, that throwing a boy out the window was the natural consequence of protecting his affair with Cersei. Maybe Show!Jaime didn't see it as a consequence but something that simply had to be done but without smugness.

Okay, I thought. That was weird but the writers have to know right? They read the books.

When Jaime and Brienne finally have that bath in the show, and how it was adapted as faithfully as possible, I thought the show finally understood him. It was weird that Jaime returned to Cersei before the Purple Wedding but i thought of nothing of it.

Until THAT episode in Season 4.

In the books, the scene above should be when Jaime returned at King's Landing after being captured by Robb Stark and The Brave Companions. The reunion was from Jaime' point of view. Cersei's consent was clear:

"Hurry," she was whispering now, "quickly, quickly, now, do it now, do me now. Jaime Jaime Jaime." Her hands helped guide him. "Yes," Cersei said as he thrust, "my brother, sweet brother, yes, like that, yes, I have you, you’re home now, you're home now, you’re home." She kissed his ear and stroked his short bristly hair."

In the show, she actually said, "It's not right!" a few times. Also, a few episodes prior to this, we saw Jaime complaining to her that he had been "back for weeks," and wanted to resume their affair. While in the books we saw two people falling in each other's arms after being apart for a long time, and needing each other desperately, in the show we saw rape. Though the claim by Benioff and Weiss was due to "bad editing/lighting" and that it was "unintentional," their refusal to actually address the issue and just re-edit and re-broadcast buried even more Jaime's redemption arc. As a viewer I forgave this mistake. Maybe next season?

Nope. It got worse.

When Jaime and Cersei made love by Joffrey' body in the books, this was the last time the twins would have sex. The books showed Jaime's gradual disillusionment with Cersei--he thought she drank too much, was tired of her scheming. Tyrion also told him about her affairs with other men. So when Jaime went to Riverrun to recover it for the Crown, he was not only the farthest from Cersei again, he was done. Just DONE. Her pleas for him to help her and promises of love end up tossed in the fire.

The show, rather than adapting this, simply diverged. Season 5 was as confused in what to do with Jaime as lots of viewers were. Season 6 saw Jaime and Cersei resume their affair before he left for the Riverlands. Returning to King's Landing in the finale, we saw the chilling look Jaime gave Cersei during her coronation.

Perhaps this was it. This would be when he falls out of love.

HA.

Season 7, until this weekend's episode, was THE WORST ADAPTATION OF JAIME. There. I'm saying it. THE WORST.

Why? It wasn't even the incest that pissed me off. Jaime, who slew the Mad King for wanting to torch King's Landing with wildfyre, did a dizzying 180 by ENABLING his sister, who murdered Queen Margaery, her former fiance, Kevan Lannister and other innocent members of the court by wildfire. Season 7 Jaime simply took Cersei at her word. Forget about Tommen, THEIR LAST SON. Who committed suicide as a result of his wife's murder. Forget about what really caused the Sept explosion. What mattered was creating a dynasty for "the last Lannisters who count."

Jaime stood by her side and in the queen' name, contributed in tearing further apart the Seven Kingdoms. No questions asked. LITERALLY no questions asked. Despite telling Cersei of the danger of her new position, he went on to rant about the lack of allies. That can be read as Jaime being practical but as the season progressed, it was proof that he would be at her side no matter what. No matter who had to be murdered. He DID say he would murder everyone until it was only the two of them left in the world. Alright.

LIoking back on past episodes, Cersei always succeeded in keeping Jaime at her side with promises of going public with their affair. In the books, Jaime pressed her to let people know he was her choice and she refused. In the Season 4 finale, she told him she told Tywin about them, resulting in passionate and this time consensual sex on a table in the White Sword Tower. In Episode 3 of Season 7, after Cersei fucked him to celebrate her victory over the Sand Snakes, we saw a loved up Jaime in the morning after.

This would be the happiest viewers had seen Jaime. Cersei, now really THE Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, would openly fuck him. The scandal reached as far as Eastwatch, with Tormund, wanting to clarify, asking which queen was discussed in a conversation. "The one with the dragons or the one who fucks her brother?"

After Daenerys and her Dothraki army burned the Lannister forces on their way back to King's Landing, a shaken and muddy Jaime returned to Cersei right away. And in the same episode, Cersei revealed she was pregnant again. This was happy news, indeed but Jaime needed to know one thing: who will Cersei acknowledge as the father.

"You."

Now I refuse to think Cersei had once again succeeded in manipulating him. I think she WAS pregnant. There's no way to fake joy like that. And yeah, though I don't ship them, I understood Jaime's happiness. Finally, he would get to be a real father.

Still, still, still. Season 7 Jaime really made no sense. There was none of Book Jaime here. None. What we saw was a guy who supported a tyrant willingly and was now going to be a real daddy. I hate it but that's really Season 7 Jaime. Even when he left Cersei, the reason was a headscratcher.

"I don't believe you," has got to be the worst break-up line because it's lame. Better if Jaime just looked at Cersei with puppy dog eyes and walked away. Really.

The beginning of Season 8 saw the writing of Jaime hitting the right beats. A different man, check. A man who honestly regrets what he did to Bran, check. A man who was no longer the golden lion and ready to fulfill a vow he made, check. Hearteyes at Brienne, check.

He knighted Brienne. BIG, FAT CHECKS.

In episode four, The Last of the Starks, Benioff and Weiss, probably tired from the glare of their computer screens, seemed to have just written the episode in bullet points. It became glaringly obvious they wanted the series over and done with. Fuck decent writing.

Jaime Lannister is not the only one who was badly written in the latest episode. Everyone seemed to have forgotten about Qyburn's ballista and Euron apparently a sharp-shooter. We have no idea how Missandei was captured. That drinking game with Jaime, Brienne, Podrick and Tyrion was awkward and misogynistic--seriously, why shame Brienne for being a virgin?

And Sansa! Sansa basically saying if she had not been raped and abused, she wouldn't be in the position she is now! Who on earth says anything like that? Answer: no one. And I don't mean Arya.

And Missandei. The ONE WOMAN OF COLOR in a blindingly white show is chained and beheaded!

Then Jaime. Oh, Jaime.

There are no happy endings in Game of Thrones. Ned Starks gets beheaded. Jon Snow gets knifed. Sansa is raped. Catelyn, Robb and Talisa get butchered. Just when victory is within reach, characters are punished so cruelly it's inhuman.

But it doesn't mean crappy writing. At fifteen million dollars an episode this season, I expect writing that reflects intelligence. Who cares about CGI wolves and dragons when the writing is shit?

Now it's no longer a question if David Benioff and D.B. Weiss hate Jaime. THEY DO. Everyone else was buffed up or given meat. They couldn't even spare Jaime Lannister a decent-sized bone.

I don't blame Jaime for leaving Brienne. Hear me out.

After Brienne and Sansa tell him the latest developments in King's Landing with regard to Cersei, we see Jaime shocked and even horrified. The next scene, he's in the chambers with Brienne contemplating what to do. And this is where the writing becomes really shitty:

1. He left her without saying goodbye.

2. He LEFT Brienne with her thinking he did it for Cersei.

What was the point of according her the respect and honor of being a knight--done by his own hand? What was the point of telling her he was no longer the fighter he was? Where was the respect when he was going to leave her as a regrettable one night stand? (But Winterfell to King's Landing is a month by land so I assume they've been banging for that long)

Nothing, it's just illogical shit.

Had the writers made just a bit more effort, Jaime Lannister should have been shown experiencing some happiness with Brienne, rather than Tyrion telling the viewers about it. We don't see it. We're just told and have to take their word for it. Jaime could have benefitted too in leaving Brienne in the NEXT episode. Why? It increases the stakes. Just one scene showing Jaime happy, just one, and of him ACTUALLY talking to Brienne about having to leave instead of being found out, and the episode probably won't be as crappy. I don't mind Brienne begging and crying, heartbreaking as that scene is. What I mind is Jaime never being shown what he stands to lose if he leaves Winterfell. Olenna Tyrell, before he he grants her the mercy of taking poison, had warned him it will be too late for him. She's right.

I believe he goes to King's Landing because of the guilt that he began a war to protect Cersei. When he does things for Cersei, the consequences are horrible and far-reaching. Easy to call him dumb and he is. But let's not forget that he charged at Daenerys and Drogon with just a spear thinking to end it all. A spear against a fire-breathing dragon. Like, what are the odds, right?

I'm not going to say anything more about The Bang That Was Promised And Sucked Donkey Balls. Enough has been said, enough hearts have been broken. We KNOW the world of Game of Thrones is dark and bitter and almost without hope. We really do. But as fans of the books and the show, FANS WHO MADE IT POSSIBLE FOR THE SERIES BE RENEWED AND HBO TO INCREASE THE BUDGET EVERY SEASON, all we ask for is good writing. We get that without actual material from George the writing is challenging. WE REALLY DO.

But is it too much to ask for the writers to set aside their hatred for one of the best characters in the series and understand him? Give him the material he deserves in the show? There is none of the Book Jaime trying so hard to be honorable. None. Instead what we've been given, since the first episode, is a train wreck of an adaptation that has now been confirmed as a character assassination.

It's not dragonfyre that has killed Jaime but writing that is careless, hurried and just plain awful. In Benioff and Weiss' determination and delusion in finishing the TV series on a high note, Jaime Lannister has been left with barely a whimper.

*Previously titled, "When Adaptations Assassinate A Character."

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