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megantheebaddest · 3 months

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Ghostin’

summary: anon request - need a drew x reader where she’s also a famous actress and got introduced to drew by madeline but upon knowing eachother , she finds out drew is messing with odessa and she just ends up ghosting him and never speaking to him and doesn’t know why reader hasn’t talked to him!

warnings: Odessa 🤣

“How are you and Drew doing? I feel like you never update me anymore.” Madelyn said pouting out her lower lip. She was sitting on the couch wrapped under the blanket you two were sharing.

“Yeah. Not much to update you on. Apparently he’s really busy filming his movie.” You shrug and start fumbling with your fingers. “i’ve asked him a handful of times when i can come visit him while i’m off from filming but..”

Madelyn scrunched her eyebrows as if she knew something. Your eyes met hers and you started to panic.

“What? Why do you look like that?” you questioned.

“Well.. i don’t know. i just.. i’ve seen Odessa visited him a couple times. It was on her finsta. Didn’t you see it?” Madelyn had a worried expression on her face.

“Wait what? I absolutely did not see that. I’ve been asking him but don’t want to seem too clingy.. Why would he ask her to come there when i’ve been specifically asking?” You asked, immediately entering instagram to search her page. “Aha.. i’m blocked?” You said showing Maddie your phone.

“Listen Drew told me not to say anything because he told me it was a thing of the past but… They used to hook up.. Like pretty often.” Madelyn was now on instagram on her phone looking it up to show you. “Oh look she just posted this 12 minutes ago on her story.” She turned the phone to show a picture of dinner plates at a fancy restaurant and you could see Drew’s perfectly big hands with his rings on. The location was tagged too, the precise location he was filming at.

You decided to text him to see how it goes…

“Okay so he’s lying to me.. But i don’t even understand why?” You showed Madelyn the phone.

She scrunched her eyebrows this time in an angry way. “I don’t understand either? He practically begged me to introduce him to you. He always talked about being a huge fan of your work and that I was so lucky to know you. I don’t know why he’s acting like this. I’m sorry Y/n, I should have known better.”

“No Maddie please don’t apologize!! We aren’t even a thing so pretty much he has every right to be hanging out with her or whoever, ya know? I just don’t get the point of lying to me and her blocking me.”

“I know exactly why she did it… She feels threatened. Anytime he meets a new friend, ESPECIALLY if it’s a girl she goes crazy! Like she’s very territorial of him. I don’t know how he doesn’t notice it.”

“Yeah that’s strange.. I definitely do not want to deal with that.”

_________

A few days pass and you still never received a call or even a text from Drew. You were on your way heading to the set of the latest film you were working on for Netflix. You were scrolling on twitter when you were interrupted by Drew’s name popping up on your screen. You instantly declined the call sending it straight to voicemail. Now that he wasn’t occupied by Odessa he has the time for you and you weren’t about that. You were both in the phase of still getting to know each other but with all of this happening and him straight up lying to you about something, not even serious, you realize you don’t want to get past this phase. You don’t want to know/involve yourself with someone like that. He sent you a text which you happily ignored (you loved that you had your read notification on), getting out of the car and heading on set.

Finishing up for the day you had another text from Drew.

This went on for days.. You had no interest replying anytime soon.

#drew starkey #drew starkey imagine #drew starkey fic #drew starkey x female reader #drew starkey x y/n #drew starkey x you #texting drew starkey #anon request #send requests #megantheebaddest

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piaduarte · 2 years

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How I manifested (crazy) physical changes

Physical changes — probably one of the most manifested topics everywhere. Hey, we've all been there:

"I hate how I look! I am so ugly!" - everybody, from time to time

But you don't have to worry; everything is possible, even the most radical, crazy physical change ever. Look at me, I am literally the living proof of that. And, the thing is, it is so easy it almost sounds unreal.

Here we go!

It all started like, a couple of months ago. You see, I used to have the worst self-esteem problems, mostly because of my chubby cheeks and my big, hooked nose. I used to literally avoid looking in the mirror because I started crying. Again, I think you'd be lying if you told me that you never, ever, felt that way. Well, the thing is, I was sick of crying and feeling bad. Back then I didn't have all the knowledge of the law I have now, but I still did it; it was the easiest thing I've ever done.

•••

So, not wanting to wait another day, I picked up my phone and took pictures of myself — feeling sick just by looking at them. I sent those hideous pictures to my tablet, and I started working (just know, if you haven't got a tablet for digital art, you can just use some random app in your phone or laptop that allows you to modify photos).

Now, let me tell you, what I did was crazy — I was laughing so much while doing it... I took the infamous golden ratio for faces and modified my face in the picture to match it. When I was done, it looked like I just had all the possible plastic surgeries in the world; but then it was time to get creative! — modify everything to your liking; I drew in longer eyelashes, darker eyes, slimmer cheeks, everything I wanted. I repeated the process on my side profile.

•••

By the time I was done, I looked at the pictures and actually recognised myself. That was really me. The new me. Enough crying, old Pía, just stare at those photos.

And that's it; I stared at those photos every time I felt "ugly" and, in the end, I walked around and felt like that girl. The new Pía; the most beautiful girl I've ever seen with my own two eyes. I looked in the mirror every now and then, and I remember thinking to myself:

"What's in there is not true. I am the girl in those photos"

And the 3D has no other choice but to rearrange itself at my own, free will

Remember that the next time a single doubt arises.

have fun and take care!

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apieceofmi · 5 months

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STRANGERS… or not

Noah Sebastian x Reader

Summary: a stranger in a train that captive her heart, never seen him again… but his face was familiar, maybe that was more than just a connection, maybe she already saw him somewhere. A lot of research and… oh, yeah, she really sees his face before, her and millions of people… it's just sad that he seems so untouchable. Right?

Author’s note: Okay, so part 2 was unexpected, but It's here!! And now I have a few more ideas for this same couple and context… I think there are more coming. Anyway, hope you like it! xx

Part One (You don't have to necessarily read the first part to understand this one, it's up to you)

__________________________________________________________

Just when I thought that my chances are over, I found him. The stranger I’ve met in a train coming back from my hometown months ago, talked for hours and I left without knowing his name.

I took the same train and visit my parents more times than is good for my mental health, I sat there and wait for him, but got nothing. Then I searched in social media, everywhere I could think of, but it is so difficult to search for something - someone in this case - that you know nothing about. I have an image in my mind, the sound of a laugh, and nothing more. We shared so much that day, but as the days passed it seemed like nothing. Then, when I gave up and convinced myself that I was making it bigger than it should have been, when I accepted that it had become just a great memory, exactly how I wanted it, I found him.

Screaming in my phone, I'm not the only one that think he's a cool guy. I feel kind of stupid when I realize that he's not just an ordinary person, and that's probably why I thought I already knew him that day on the train.

Not a surprise, just me romanticizing my life again.

And maybe that is the reason why I'm doing it again, because I swear that I feel something more around this - him. In my delusion mind, you don't meet someone by chance. You don't screw up the chance you have to really know someone when you feel a special connection with them. Not like I did. Maybe that's the reason that I feel the necessity to just see him again. I don't know what I expect of this, and maybe I should just let it go, but I have friends that are delusional like me, and they support me with this crazy feeling… So, yeah, I listened to all of his band's albums and came to a show - just because it was in my city. It's not like I fight for tickets when I found out that they would be here. Not at all.

Everything was good, and I was already feeling that coming to the show was the closure that I need to this history when my friend Anna, that came with me, grab my hand while we're exiting the venue.

“Let's wait outside. I know some fans do it, sometimes they stop to take pictures and talk to them.”

I get nervous immediately. I've already seen him, discovered who he is and for me that's enough, I don't have the courage to be in front of him again. I don't want him to think that I'm stalking him and make this role thing uncomfortable. It was supposed to be something nice, just it. Actually, it was just supposed to be a memory. Everything that happened after I left that day shouldn't have happened, I didn't say my name because I didn't want anything to happen. I'm going further than I should, I'm exceeding the limit I drew for myself. It's more than enough.

“No! We can't wait for them!” I protest, thinking in an excuse when Anna looks at me, her eyes narrow, knowing me well enough. “I have to work in the morning.”

“You can miss one rehearsal.”

“I have class tomorrow. I can't miss it, I'm the teacher.” I say, but Anna doesn't take me serious, she knows that I'm having a meltdown right now. “What if they don't even came out? We’re just going to lose time waiting here.”

Squeezing my hand, she smiles at me.

“Then at least you tried.”

So we wait, talk with some people that are waiting there too and it's cool. It's nice. But I can't stop feeling that I'm doing something wrong being here. I don't know, betraying the universe, maybe? I made my choice that day and just because I regret it now, can I just switch sides?

Uh, no, I don't think so.

Maybe it's supposed to be just like it was, some nice exchange in the train between strangers. Maybe it supposed for me not saying my name.

I'm almost given up and going home when I see them coming in our direction. Anna has a big smile in her face, her eyes shinning, and I almost can hear her saying - he's here! He's here! - but I just look at her and then at him approaching the others, and I freeze, taking a step back.

There's another member of the band with him - with I know now that his name is Nicholas - and they start to talking with the little crowed waiting for them. I stay in the corner with Anna, without a clue to how to start this interaction without being a weirdo.

I'm still considering running out of here when his eyes catch me one time. Two times. A little frowning in his face in the third time. What if he doesn't remember me?

“I know you” he says, his eyes studying mine, coming closer.

“We met at…” But I don't need to finish when his faces changes. He recognizes me.

“Yes, I remember” he smiles. “You found me.”

I let out a small nervous breath, forcing it into a weak smile.

“It took long enough, but yes. I did found you.”

There’s a grin that won't leave his lips, and I cannot stop staring at it.

“What's your name?” Yeah, here's the million dollars question.

I finally tell him my name, answering the question I should have answered months ago when I had the opportunity, then had to beg the universe for another chance.

“Well, I’m Noah” he says next.

“Nice to meet you.” I chuckled nervously.

I already know his name, but him saying it to me feels more legit. I think I can finally stop referring to this man in my mind as him or the stranger.

He finally has a name.

“You liked the show?” Noah asks.

“Yes! It was so great!” I rejoiced. “You guys are so talented! I was shocked when I was listening the albums, I'm just… I became a fan.”

The smile in Noah’s lips grows and the shy look in his eyes makes strange things happen in my stomach. I really hope that's not butterflies. It's like something frozen at the moment, at the same time suddenly I'm well aware of the people still around us, hoping for a little more time with the members of the band they came to see.

Noah gives me a little embrace, catching me off guard when I hear his voice so close.

“You found me, now it's my time” he whispers in my ear.

“I follow you” I replied, the words coming out my mouth like it's an urgency.

“Great.” he says, stepping back and giving attention to the person next to us.

I look around for Anna, who I didn't even see leaving, she's back at my side in a second.

“How it was?” she asks as we leave.

“He said he's going to find me” I chuckle. “ I think on social media? I don't know.”

“It would be suspicious if he asked for your number in front of everyone.” She considers. “Or even invite you for, I don't know… their bus” Anna makes a funny face, giving me a side look. “I wouldn’t let you leave with him like that anyway, he’s cute and talented, but he’s still a man.”

I laugh, loving her a little more for taking care of me.

“I wouldn’t abandon you like that.” I say. “Thank you for coming with me.”

"Of course. As if I would miss the chance to help my best friend meet her train crush, who happened to be a fucking rock star." She rolls her eyes, getting into the car.

“It don't even make sense.” I let out a disbelief laugh. “Did you see how many people were there today? This is like impossible, he's famous, a celebrity, I'm not the kind of person…”

“Stop it right now.” She interrupts me. “He's a person just like you are. Yes, he's talented and is in a band that obviously is getting bigger every second, but it doesn't mean anything. He's human. You're human. It's all we need.”

“You're right, I'm thinking too much again.” I say, starting the car. “At least I tried.”

I'm already home getting ready to sleep when a notification came on my phone. A message on Instagram from an account with a peculiar profile pic. I don't make a ceremony and open it right away.

“I can't believe that I spend two hours talking with you that day and don't ask your name first thing!”

“I swear, I'm not like this in normal situations”

“You got me nervous”

I bite my bottom lip, trying to stop myself from smiling.

“I'm sorry for not saying my name when you asked. I regret it every day since I left.”

“Two fools”

“How did you found me? I tried to look for you but get nothing”

“Well, I'm not as popular as you”

“A video of the band randomly appeared on my timeline, I think I talked about the guy on the train so much to my friends that the algorithm took pity on me and threw it in my face.”

“For once social media did something right”

“So… You're going to stay in town or…?”

“No. We already left”

“I didn't want to expose you out there earlier, but if you get me your number, I can let you know when I'm around?”

“I'll understand if you don't want to, my life can be a little crazy sometimes.”

There's no hesitation in my answer.

“I really want to know better the guy that I met on the train three months ago and can't stop wondering about, so… Yes, If that's okay for you.”

“Great. I've searched for you in every city that we go to since that day, can't wait to properly get to know you too, stranger.”

So I sent my number.

And God, I should have known I was in trouble the moment I got that first message from him. As the days went by, I realized that I was crazy to think that Noah was untouchable just because of what he does for a living, he has become the funniest and sweetest person I know.

We're definitely not strangers anymore.

Not when we talk every day now.

Not when I learned all his favorites.

Not when I’m counting days to see Noah in person again.

#noah sebastian fic #noah sebastian fanfic #bad omens x reader #noah sebastian and reader #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian fluff

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smartycvnt · 4 months

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Inked

Title: Inked

Pairing: Dominik Mysterio x Reader

Summary: Dom surprises Ash with a tattoo.

Word Count: 708

Warnings: none

"Alright man, you are all done." Dom slowly stood as his tattoo artist moved away from him. Dom looked proudly at the new piece he had picked out to represent his feelings for Ash. She loved his tattoos, and just a few weeks earlier had jokingly drawn that design on him with a sharpie. All Dom had done was have his artist make a different version of that to actually tattoo on his skin.

"Thank you man. I can't even begin to tell you how much this means. Ash is going to love it," Dom said. He gave the man a quick hug as he went up to finish the payment. It would be a little while before Ash would be able to see it, but Dom was certain that she would absolutely love it.

The few days that Dom was away with The Judgement Day doing shows was like hell for him. He just wanted to go home and show Ash his new tattoo. Especially once the other guys started to rip on him for being such a sap. They couldn't believe that Dom still acted like such a softie after going his rounds with Rhea.

Dom didn't mind their teasing. He loved Ash, and Ash loved him. If there was one thing that Dom knew for sure, it was that he was going to marry Ash one day. That was the woman that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, so he had to treat her right.

There was just enough time between Dom getting his tattoo and seeing Ash again for him to wonder if she would think it was stupid. He was nervous as he walked up to their house. They had only just moved in with each other a few months ago. They were still just dating, and Dom didn't even know if Ash felt as strongly for him as he did for her. That wouldn't matter though because Dom wasn't sure that it was possible for anybody to love someone else as much as he loved Ash.

"Honey, I'm home!" Dom called out as he pushed his way through the front door with his suitcase. Ash was sitting on the couch playing a video game, but she immediately paused it and set the controller down to go over to him. Dom dropped his bags at his feet to wrap his arms around Ash for a hug. Ash pressed a couple of kisses to the side of his jaw before backing away just enough to give him a kiss on the lips.

"I've got something to show you," Ash told him. Dom's interest was definitely piqued, but not quite enough for him to forget about his own surprise for Ash. "It seems a little extreme, but I was going stir crazy and was planning on getting something done anyway."

"Oh?" Dom placed his hand on the bottom of his shorts, fiddling with the hem. "I have a surprise for you too."

"Well, you can go first," Ash said. She leaned against the back of the couch and watched Dom slowly lift up the bottom of his shorts to reveal a tattoo on his thigh. Ash looked at it for a moment before she broke out into a huge smile. "Is that the one I drew on you?"

"Yeah, it is," Dom confirmed sheepishly. Ash jumped up into his arms and pressed several kisses to his face. "I take it that you like it?"

"I love it. It's so much better than the one I got for you," Ash said. She pulled her sweatpants down just enough to reveal a skull wearing a purple bandana over the lower part of its face with a 'D' carved into its forehead.

"That's for me? That's awesome," Dom said. He dropped down to his knees to get a better look at the new tattoo. Ash let her hand fall onto the top of his head, running her fingers through his hair as he took in every little detail of her tattoo that he could. "I love it. I love you."

"I love you too." Ash smiled down at Dom, and in that moment, knew she would never love another person like she loved him.

#my writing #one shot #dominik mysterio x reader #dominik mysterio #dom mysterio x reader #dom mysterio #wwe x reader #wwe

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starssgalore · 1 year

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Baby please come back; namor x fem!reader

A/N: alright y'all, this is the last part. You might be mad at how it ends but trust!! It's better than what I originally drafted out. But there are new things coming. But if you liked things like this PLEASE like and follow. I love writing and sharing stuff on here and I want to continue so please tell me or show me you like it too!!

warnings: brief mentions of drowning, very emotional, very angsty...

tags: @rose-bliss247 (sorry if this is not the right account!!), @caroldxnvxrs, @violet-19999, @omgsuperstarg, @deliciousfestsalad

part 2 playlist updated! taglist

'I fucking knew I should have come, this is what I get for messing with a mutant god for 3 years.' The only thing you could think of is how dumb you we're, "No wHeRe nOt GoIng To nAmOr'S BeAcH." Should have left when you could have. But here you are, tied to a chair in a room that is all too familiar.

He still has that goddamn painting of his quote on quote, "glorious and vicious" battle with the princess of Wakanda. But nothing else has changed, the table cloth, the blankets and lights haven't changed one bit since you left. It was actually the first thing that drew you in when you first got here. Maybe he didn't change them because he knew you liked them. You wished he changed his kidnapping approach, almost died getting dragged down here.

"Namor, what do you want? I'm not gonna sit here and be tied to a chair while you have your general point their spears at me." For the last 10 minutes he's had Namora in the same defensive position, whilst he paces back and forth. "Silence, you no longer have any sort of authority here anymore. You lost that privilege when you left two years ago." "Authority?! Are you crazy, your people did not care if I was your so-called "close friend." Two years ago you kept me basically a secret and then asked me why I was mad being kept a secret?!" You can't believe this man, so full of himself. All he can say is 'you no longer have authority here.' "Namora, you may leave, go back to patrolling." Namor's expression was a mixture of tiredness and somewhat relieved, as if he's happy you're back. Even after he made that huge argument, he's acting like nothing happened.

"Namor, what do you want?" Leaning down to reach your chair, "I want you back." He whispers, his voice flowing through your mind like a familiar symphony. "You lost me the day you threatened me." Hold your ground, the last thing you want to happen is him thinking you're dependent on him. "This isn't an option, I've already told my people that there will be a new queen soon. I can't let them down y/n." Namor's proposal is almost infuriating, you wait years for Namor to tell his people about you.

And now when you leave he tells them? Fucking ridiculous. "What makes you think that I would even willing agree if this was an option." "Well it's what you want right? You said you wanted the people to know about you. So here I am telling them about you." A god who doesn't understand the concept of the past can't be fixed, shocking almost. "Namor, that was 2 years ago. I've moved on. I'm dating people, I hope that you move on too." "Move on y/n, I can't just move on. You were one, and I was just blind I didn't realize how much I need you in my life. You made me feel human again." His words make it so tempting to go back, to fall into those arms again.

To kiss his lips as if there the only thing you need, to rule by his side. Be his one and only, again. But there comes a time to be real and wake up from your delusional dreams. "Namor, mí amor." You caress his face, the feeling of his stubble underneath your soft fingers tips send a shiver down your spine, "I can't just got back to loving you. I would love to forget what happened but I can't, what happened 2 years ago will stick with me forever. It's best if we're just friends." The last couple of words you let out send a ringing to Namor's ears, as if he's gone deaf on the spot.

Coldness is all he can feel throughout his body, numb to the words you spoke. A stage of grief hitting his body like a train, he's lost you. There's no way your coming back, your just "friends" now. "Oh... o-ok. I understand." The break in his voice makes you wanna give him the biggest hug Namor has ever felt in his life, but if you do you'll fall back into that trance. "Namor please, please don't cry. I still love you just not like I used too."

None of the comforting words you speak to him will make him feel warm again. To fall in love with a mortal is a dangerous thing is the only thought I his now empty head. The world spinning so fast around you, body feeling dry, as if he needs to dive, deep into the ocean to soothe it's hunger.

"Um y/n, I need to go. I'll have Namora come back and untie you. I'll see you sometime again, just not now..." And with those last words, Namor out of the room and into the ocean. Your heart aches, the amount of pain you feel is too large. You never meant to hurt him like that, it wasn't supposed to go like this. 'It's ok, just breathe. Namor is fine, he is ok, he will be fine. You did nothing wrong. He's ok, he just needs to clear his head.' Namora finally cuts the rope that holds you bond to your chair, and finally brings you back to your ship.

On the cruise

The walk back to your room was slow. Filled with the conversation you just had, thinking about if you fell back to him, if you gave in. How it could have gone better. But too be in love again with Namor is dangerous, a commitment you're not even sure about taking. Sadly, your in depth thought is broken up by Kira's drunken state.

"Y/N?! Where the hell were you?" Words slurred together, "Sorry Kira, I had gotten caught up-" "Caught up in what Y/N? We're on vacation, you can't just leave me like that.." "I know I'm sorry it's just I need to like be alone for a second. I'm gonna go sit on the deck if it's still open." All you need is a place for you to clear your mind.

On the deck

Maybe you should go back, what harm could be done. Well you could drown on the way back, but if you make it there what's the big issue. You could burn the world with him, rule with him, be Namor's one and only. Just swim back. The breeze is almost pushing you off the deck, as if it's trying to tell you to go back. Maybe the wind was right. It wouldn't hurt, like to be with what you thought was the love of your life.

The recliner was just at the guard rail, if you jumped now no one would see you. Plus you could always call Namor, or he would eventually come right? No. If you jump off now you'll be stranded in the water and Namor would be too depressed to get up and swim to the surface to grab you and rescue you to shore. And if you drowned, he wouldn't kiss you on the lips to start mouth to mouth because he's so sad about you. Maybe going to the deck was a bad idea.

The only way to resolve this is to get off the cruise and go back to the beach. The only way this "idea" will leave your mind is if you go back, which is physical impossible. You know what, there's nothing you can do, just sit down and relax, is the only thought running through your mind. How can you make it up to Namor, or if you should even make it up to him.

Well, I hope y'all are good with that cause this is the end! Not the end of my writing but I have more things along the way so don't unfollow me now!!! But as always...

xoxo,

hoshi 💫

#black panther #marvel #namor imagine #namor x fem!reader #x reader #namor #namor the sub mariner #tenoch huerta #wakanda forever #marvel imagine

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sheisobvious · 1 year

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some old stuff I found on pinterest (and below interesting things) - Part 1

Picture 1

“One minute Taylor is busting out lyrics and being adorable in front of the camera, and the next she is like high-fashion model”

Q: What type of music are you into right now?

TS: A Late’80s pop. One of my favorite songs is “She Drives Me Crazy”, by Fine Young Cannibals.It was so ahead of its time.

App she loves – 8MM vintage camera

TS: “It lets you put a cool, 1960s-style filter on iPhone videos and gives clips a moody grain”

Picture 2

COSMOGIRL 2009

TS: "My newest hobby is going to wal-mart and putting my CD in front of others in the rack. I have no shame in it!"

Picture 3

Seventeen Magazine (2008)

Q: Do you think that he ( the guy from “Should’ve Said No”) secretly likes being named in your songs? TS: Yeah, probably. Those kinds of guys like getting attention – because I mean, what else is he doing? He’s probably with six different girls who don’t know that they’re being played.

Q: Has he (Drew from “Teardrops on My Guitar”) contacted you?

TS: Actually, he showed up in my driveway a couple of months ago, and it was like in the movies where at the end the guy shows up in your driveway, and you have this awesome kiss – except it’s three years too late. I’m like, Why didn’t you do this years ago ?!? He was stranger by then, so I felt like I didn’t know him anymore.

Q: Do you ever write songs about anyone other than yourself?

TS: “Tied Together With a Smile” is about a girl I knew my freshman year. She was absolutely Miss Popular, a pageaant girl, and she looked perfect every day! Always had the cutest outfits, always looked teh best at prom. But sometimes when you get a litle closer to people who look that perfect, you realize that they don’t feel perfect.They feel they’re ugly. And that’s what happened with this girl- I became closer friends with her, and one day she confessed that she was bulimic.

Q: How did that make you feel?

TS: It was really hard for me to take. But I never want to make someone feel horrible. do not deserve to be treated like that. I try to reason with them and be calm about it. After a while, I was just like, "You don't need to do that anymore." So I played that song for her, and I said, "Who do you think that's about?" And honestly, I don't think she ever did it after that.

Q: Have you ever felt bad about the way you look?

TS: Everybody does! Everybody looks in the mirror and is like, I wonder why her eyes are huge and mine are smaller. But I realized that if you’re lucky enough to be different from everybody else, don’t change.

Q: Do you ever wonder what it would be like to be someone eise?

TS: Oh, my gosh, if I were a different person and I could start all over, I would want to be Hayley Williams from Paramore! I think she’s awesome, and their music is amazing. But you know, I love country music more than anything in the world – I would never change what I do.

Picture 4

“I’ve seen a lot of you get new cars”, she joke to those who worked on the album (Fearless)

Picture 5

YOU (2009)

FAVORITE BOOK – Who Will Cry When You Die? By Robin S. Sharma. It’s a self-help but It’s na easy read. Every page has a new thing you can do to show the people you love that they matter to you. It makes you appreciate what you have. I have a lot more good days now that I’ve read that.

STYLE ICON – Cahrlize Theron. Thank you for saying I look a bit like her – taht makes my whole week.

BEAUTY PRODUCTS – My favourite lip colour is Dragon Girl by Nars;l realy like Armani make-up and there's a perfume that l get when ľ'm in the UK called Midnight Rain by La Prairie. And I love Jo Malone candles.

I: As ever, she sounds too good to be true . It might be one reason why. If we're being honest what eveyone realy wants to see is Taylor Swit being a litte bit naughty. Surely the teetotal Pollyanna façade must have cracks? Anyway, wouldn’t a bit of teenage rebellion be healthy?

TS: “I've been given the freedom to do whatever I want. I'm 19 –if want to storm out of the house and go to a club and get drunk and take my clothes off and run naked through Nashville, I can do that. I just really would rather not. I's as simple as that. It's not like I’ve been beaten down by some corporation that's forcing me to always behave myself - l just naturally do. Sometimes people are fascinated by the fact that I don't care about partying. almost to the point where they think it's weird.l think when we get to the point where it's strange for you to not be stumbing around high on something at 19, t's a warped world.”

Picture 6

PEOPLE, 2009

Q: You just gave a $250,000 donation to schools you had previously attended or worked with. Why schools?

TS: The schools that I went to and the amazing people I got to learn from relly turned me into who I am, and I wanted to give back.

Q:If you’ve done all this by the time you turned 20, what do you want to do bu the time you turn 30?

TS:I think I’d like to have made a couple more albums that I’m really proud of. I’d like to have a house. I’m not the kid the girl who makes a goal for herself of getting married or starting a family. I’ve never really put a timeline on those sorts of things. So I don’t have any personal goals by the time I’m 30.

(midnight rain vibe)

Picture 7

Q: What would you say is your biggest love “don’t” ?

TS: No one wants to be with someone who desperately needs them. You should want the other person and love him, but you shouldn’t need him. If you depend on him for your happiness, that’s not good ,because what will you do when it ends?

Picture 8

TIGER BEAT

I CALLED THIS ALBUM RED BECAUSE.. “all the different emotions written about on this album, they’re all about the tumultuous, crazy, insane, intense, semitoxic relationships that I’ve experienced in the last two years. In my mind, all of those emotions are red.”

(I think this is the first time I see her referring to this relationship as toxic before 2022)

Picture 9

BOP 2012

Taylor Swift looks down at the floor as she talks about the songs on her new album, Red (it comes out October 22). "They're sad, if I'm being honest,"she confesses. Tay's big blue eyes get a little teary as she thinks about her life right now.In the last two years. Tay says she's felt "all of those emotions, travels around spanning from intense love,intense the workd with frustration, jealousy and confusion." She also admits. "There's been this earth-shattering. not recent, but absolute crash-and-bum neartbreak."

(in this interview they are weird about her parents divorce)

#taylor swift #mine #tsedit #candy swift #tswiftedit #tsedits #tswiftart #tswiftcreatorsnet #tswiftedits #taylor swift lyrics #taylor swift interviews

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carolinaboy34 · 1 year

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“School Nurse”

He had me laid out on the exam table, my shirt pushed up and my sweatpants and underwear tucked under my balls, tweaking a nipple while he deep throated my dick to the base. He was pulling and squeezing my balls with his other hand and using his tongue to rub the head of my dick when he pulled up off of it and swallowing it when he dropped back down. I started to hump into his face and moan quietly, breathing more deeply as my orgasm was approaching. He pulled off and said “Not yet! And grabbed my shaft and squeezed hard, pushing my orgasm back into my body.

I had been pushing really hard at school, up late studying for midterms, working out and being as social as I could stand, which meant late nights and decreased sleep, so I wasn’t surprised when I caught what I hoped was just a cold. We wash our hands and use sanitizer all the time, but those little bugs have a way of making it through our defenses, especially when our body isn’t optimized. So, I put on my mask and went to the health center at school for a check-up. If I had the flu, or worse, it meant quarantine and school work in my room. Ugh.

When I got there and checked in, I gathered in the waiting room with at least 20 other people, all coughing and sneezing on each other, so I sat in the corner and tried not to breathe very deeply. I read stories, posted on Instagram, sent some messages on Grindr and exhausted just about every form of entertainment my phone could supply when I was finally called back to an exam room. The nurse that called me was really attractive, tall and skinny with dark hair and a smirk on his bearded face. His gray scrubs fit nice and snug and didn’t leave much to my imagination, showing off his tight ass and bulge in the front very well.

He brought me into an exam room and shut the door, then he introduced himself.

“Hello, Drew. I’m Matt, one of the nurse practitioners staffing the clinic today. Man, it’s been crazy! How are you?”

“Hi, Matt. I’m alright. I got sick about three days ago with congestion and a sore throat, but then I threw up last night. I’ve been up a lot with midterms, so I haven’t been sleeping well. And my roommate brought something back from home last weekend, so I wanted to make sure I didn’t have the flu or something.” I was rambling, but the way he was sitting in his chair across from me made his bulge stick out prominently, and it was very distracting.

“Ahh. Yes, as you could see, we’ve had quite a few sick people in the clinic the past couple of days. They called us all in and are paying extra to cover the clinic! Anyway, have you taken anything to make it better?”

“Yeah, I took some cold medicine and had some tea with honey, but it really hasn’t helped much.” I felt like I was talking to his crotch, because I don’t think I took my eyes off of it. He caught on and was opening and closing his thighs, which caused his bulge to move up and down, popping up into my view.

“Ok. Let me see if there is anything to worry about. We’ve been seeing lots of upper respiratory infections and flu.”

He put his stethoscope to my chest with the other hand on my back. He listened to the different areas of my chest, then switched hands and listened to my back, his other hand on my chest and very lightly rubbing over my nipple. After finishing listening, he got his ear light and looked in my ears, using his hand on my chin to hold me steady and move my head back and forth to see both sides. My knee lightly brushed against his crotch when he leaned in, and I could feel his semi-hard cock hidden behind his snug scrubs. His face was right next to mine while he looked at my ears, and I could feel his breath on my cheek. He seemed to linger for a few seconds then asked me to lay down on the exam table so he could examine my abdomen.

I layed back on the table, the paper crinkling underneath me, and brought my legs up so I was supine. I rested my arms to my side, while he came up to the edge of the table, his crotch bulging out and resting on the paper next to me. He started to push on my abdomen and raised my shirt up to touch my skin. I flexed my wrist slightly, and the back of my hand rubbed against his dick, which was harder than it was before. He continued to push on my abdomen, but he started to go further down, his fingers able to work under the waistband of my underwear and sweatpants. I was hard as stone, and the erotic energy in the room was zinging each of us. My dick reached up to the waistband too, and his fingers brushed against the tip, causing it to jump up.

I pushed back against his dick harder then twisted my hand around and rubbed him through the outside of his scrubs, and he reached his hand into my pants and wrapped his hand around me. He humped into my hand and pushed the waist of my pants down to hook them under my balls, and he began to openly stroke my shaft. Precum began to ooze out the tip of my dick and run down the shaft, coating it and lubricating his hand. I untied his scrub pants and worked my hand into the waist, wrapping my hand around him and stroking him as well.

He pulled his body away from the edge of the table and bent at the waist as he held my dick upright and took me into his mouth. His tongue rubbed against the head and shaft as he took me further into his mouth until he bottomed out, and his throat enveloped my dick head. His hand took my balls into his grasp and rolled them around in my sac, then gripped them tight and began to pull on them. I raised up off the bed and let out a gasp and a moan, pushing my dick all the way into his throat. I started to hump into his face and moan quietly, breathing more deeply as my orgasm was approaching. He pulled off and said “Not yet!” and grabbed my shaft and squeezed hard, pushing my orgasm back into my body. He dropped my wet dick back onto my abs. His hand left my balls and pushed down against my taint, and I spread my legs a little to give him some room. His middle finger pushed further down until it came in contact with my pucker, rubbing against it and spreading my cheeks apart.

I reached out and grabbed his dick again, pulled him over to me and took him into my mouth. I throated his dick in one move and then rapidly sucked him and stroked him with my hand, my spit lubricating my movement and making a squishing sound in the tiny room. He pulled his hand out and pushed my pants down my legs while I kicked my shoes off and worked my sweats off as well. I bent my knees, brought them up and let them fall to my sides, exposing my hole to him and the cool air of the exam room. He reached back down and started to rub my hole again before sucking a finger into his mouth and coating it. He then worked it back down my taint and over my hole before pushing in to the first knuckle. I moaned out loud and pushed against his hand, and he sank all the way to the base and rubbed my prostate with the tip of his finger.

“You’d better be quiet! The nurse might want to see what’s going on!”

“Oh fuck! OK. Just feels so good!”

He leaned over and grabbed my underwear then stuffed it into my mouth and went to the end of the table. He pulled me down the bed until my ass was hanging over the edge and then bent down and pushed my knees up to my chest. He leaned in and started to kiss my butt cheeks before zeroing in on my hole and eating me out. His tongue lapped at my hole then stiffened and entered me, his mouth and teeth rubbing against my taint while his tongue sank into me. He massaged my legs while he held them against my chest and continued to tongue fuck me, lubing up my entrance for his dick.

He then stood and took off his clothes, getting naked before me and allowing me to admire his body. His broad shoulders topped a firm chest covered with a light fur that he clearly kept clipped. His pecs were well pronounced but not huge, and they were topped with small, pale nipples. His abs rippled as he stood there, and his hair formed a trail that descended across his six-pack then spread out to a wide pubic bush that was also clipped. His hard dick rose out of his pubes and was about 6.5” long with a wicked curve upright, back toward his body. It had a flared, flat head and was covered with a glistening coating of precum.

He grabbed his dick and stroked it a few times then came up close to me and pushed it down until the flat head kissed my hole. I flexed my hole a few times to accept him as he started to slowly push into me. I brought my legs up around his waist and pulled him in quickly, his abs and pubes bumping into my taint. I held him tight against me as I wrapped my legs tightly around him, and he ground his dick into me and stretched me open.

I spit my underwear out then said “Fuck me, Matt. Come on. You feel great!”

“OK, Drew. Fuck, your hole is amazing. It’s like stroking me and I’m not moving!”

With that, I relaxed my legs and let him slowly pull out before he pushed back into me, then he began to stroke in and out of my hole, his balls slapping against my ass with each push into me. He grabbed my legs and brought them up against his body, my feet by his face and held tight, fucking me with long, deep strokes. The curve of his dick felt so amazing as it went in and out, his head rubbing the walls of my colon and the shaft stroking against my prostate with each thrust. His regular fucking felt amazing, and I was getting close to cumming, my balls trapped by my thighs held tight by Matt’s grip.

“Drew, I need to cum before they start looking for me. Can I give you my load?”

“Yeah, Matt, Breed my hole. Fill me up with your babies!”

He started to really slam his dick into my hole, never letting go of my legs, his body slapping against me with each thrust. My trapped balls were being hit by his body, causing delicious pain with each thrust, and I felt my orgasm rising up from deep within. I screeched into my hands as my orgasm fired out of my dick and sprayed my chest with my load. The contractions of my body caused by my orgasm gripped his dick and caused him to push into me one last time and hold me tight as he fired his 7-8 shots directly into my ass.

As his orgasm slowed, he continued to hold my legs tight and stayed deep within me. I flexed my legs and pulled them from his grip, my knees falling to the side. My ass contracted and ejected him from inside me, his load leaking out onto the table under me. He stood there and just caught his breath for several seconds, looking down at my relaxed body covered in my load, his leaking from my loose hole.

He then moved over and started gathering his clothes that were strewn all over the room and got dressed. He gathered mine and threw them at me.

“Drew. That was awesome. I think you’re fine with just an upper respiratory infection. Drink plenty of fluids and take medicine for the symptoms. OK?”

“Uh, sure Matt. Sounds good.”

“Great. Be sure to gather all of your things, we have lots of patients to see!”

With that, he left me on the exam table. I slowly rose and got dressed, leaving my cum to soak into my shirt and his into my underwear. As I walked back to my dorm and felt the squish of his cum between my cheeks, I knew that a good protein injection was what I needed to feel better!

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meraki-yao · 8 months

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RWRB Musical Ramble Part 2: References/Parallels

More on this brain rot because I’m losing my mind over it

I thought of moments and scenes from the movie (because if we’re gonna adapt this into a musical, we’re gonna need to use the movie more than the book just because of the limitation of theatre) that sort of draw parallels to songs and moments from musicals I know:

Their initial feud and quips from the opening scenes remind me of “What is this Feeling” from Wicked, which in the musical, is literally the start of Glinda and Elphaba’s enemies-to-friends arc. Plus this part would be so funny with Henry:

Yes, there's been some confusion

For you see, my room-mate is

Unusually and exceedingly peculiar

And altogether quite impossible to describe

Blonde

Matthew literally posted this parallel on his Instagram story a few days ago: The get low moment in the movie is so similar to the dance in West Side Story, so imagine an upbeat fun party song where everyone is dancing and suddenly it’s just the two of them staring at each other while their motif plays

The Red Room/ First Hook Up/ Polo scene fits perfectly with Bad Idea from Waitress, I mean Alex initially calls them a beautiful mistake in the books, and just look at the lyrics:

Heart, keep racing

Let's make mistakes

Let us say, "So what?"

And make worse what was already pretty bad

This secret is safe

No reason to throw it away when there's love to be had

Hold me tight as I tell myself that you might make sense

And make good what has been just so bad

Let's see this through

It's a pretty good bad idea

Me and you

Plus in the actual show, the reprise is literally just the three couples having very enthusiastic sex, and again, lyrics:

Hearts keep racing

There’s no mistaking

We can’t come back from this

Good, ’cause I want more of what I had

It feels so good to…

Feels so good…

To be bad

Take this bad idea and walk this wire

Throw your spark into oil and fire

Chance won’t come every single day

So don’t throw it away

Don’t throw it away

We might burn but we might get saved

I don’t feel much fire at all these days

Feels so good to

Feels so good to be

Bad

The Emails can be done like “Take a Break” from Hamilton, where Angelica and Hamilton, or Alex and Henry are on different, opposite parts of the stage, left and right, or like in Hamilton, Alex working on the campaign on the base stage, while Henry’s on the balcony, taking turns singing their letters/emails out, we could even add the cute signatures from the book every time they finish their own verse, and the chorus could be a harmony sang together about how much they miss each other, plus Hamilton and Angelica are literally in America and London respectively and Take a Break has this line:

And there you are an ocean away

Do you have to live an ocean away?

Thoughts of you subside

Then I get another letter

And I cannot put the notion away

I thought of the Waterloo Letters paralleling the Reynolds Pamphlet from Hamilton, but on second thought although they’re both about “affairs”, the Firstprince one is a genuinely loving and monogamous relationship unlike the extra-marital sexual affair Hamilton had, and in Hamilton, we see it from other people’s perspective like Jefferson, Maddison, Philip and Angelica, but in RWRB both the book and movie show us the reaction of Henry and Alex, the two people directly involved. Plus in terms of emotions, Reynold Pamphlet feels damning on Hamilton, while the Waterloo Letters feel heart-breaking on Henry and Alex. But the staging of letters flying around and everyone reading it like crazy would translate pretty well

That’s all I can think of for now but this was really fun!!! I’ll definitely write again when I think of more

Finding GiFs and formatting for this was so exhausting and took me more time and writing the actual post, I'll add the rest later when I figure out where tf the gifs I want are and how to format this properly

Part 1 / Part 3

#rwrb movie #red white and royal blue #rwrb #alex claremont diaz #firstprince #henry hanover stuart fox #henry fox mountchristen windsor #rwrb thoughts #rwrb musical #watch me go insane over this #musical theatre #Spotify #meraki essay

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dausy · 4 months

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Well I've been daily updating twitter ofcourse. I kind of at the last moment decided I was going to do a daily doodle thing. I did this years ago, where I drew something every day for a year. I'm not doing a full illustration this time just really simple, essentially a couple lines and thats it. Just to help the creative juices flowing. I probably wont stick it out for an entire year but I keep getting myself backed up into an artistic corner and I want to back back out of it and find a new corner. Instead while I've been doing that, I've also been using it as an excuse to update the status of my current ailment.

so essentially, I had already self-diagnosed myself with the flu but I did go ahead and made an urgent care appointment on Saturday (?). I will say that I normally get a flu shot, every year, I did not get one this year. Next year I will definitely be getting one. I definitely got this from my coworkers and theres was like 3x milder than mine. My immune system was not prepared.

I did not want to physically go to urgent care because I didn't feel safe driving. I was super short of breath and I felt very drunk (because its in my ears! my ears are messed up). Also, didn't want to sit in a waiting room when sitting up sounded like a lot of effort and besides, what is urgent care going to tell me that I dont already know? viruses are treated with rest and fluids and thats it. However, I assumed my boss was going to be on top of me for some sort of a work note even though I'm not a full time employee and I dont feel like I should need one but I had agreed to work on monday and if I called in she'd probably pitch a fit. I discovered, thanks to the local spouse groups, that there was a local mobile urgent care. They came to my house! I schedule an appointment and they came out about an hour later. The most convenient thing ever. They apparently didn't take my insurance so they charged me 179$ out of pocket but I wasn't going to complain. I didn't have to go anywhere. I could track the MA on gps and they sent me his photo so I didn't "have to be scared" lmao. It was all very nice.

I had already tested myself for covid and it was negative. I was tempted to start myself on prednisone (because I practically have an entire pharmacy at home) but HR was a good 115 and adding steroid to that sounded not fun. Normally my HR runs 60s if Im calm and 80s if Im stressed. 115 with steroids on board didn't sound like fun. My 02 was dropping to 93 when I was up and walking around but it would go back up to the high 90s. This poor MA came with a laptop that virutally connected to a PA and they were like "what do you want me to do for you?" like I guess I mainly just wanted to make sure that I was safe to be at home and I have evidence I saw some sort of healthcare person as proof.

I oddly enough didn't have much of a cough until about yesterday. I was feeling short of breath and when I did cough I'd cough gunk up but mainly it just hurt to cough but it wasn't frequent at all. Now I'm coughing alot. The worst part was the hot/cold flashes. I completely drenched the bed in sweat. I've never seen that much water come off of me. I literally touched the valley of my stomach and it was a puddle. I splished my hands in it. I would alternate between uncontrollable sweating to then freezing to death. I thought I'd be over it and I washed all my linens yesterday and then last night, just sweat everywhere. Which was annoying because I felt....nagged..?..guilttripped? to go into work today by my boss. Like I was faking it..I couldnt possibly be sick that long(my coworkers recovered in 2 days)..maybe I was crazy and I wasn't sick?

so I did! I WENT TO WORK TODAY. My coworkers were actually fine. They said they were actually surprised they handled things well without me. I'm simultaneously proud of them and really aggravated that I went in. Because I really did feel terrible. I realized real fast how weak I was and my brain was not functioning. I even gave myself the easiest roll I could where I was off in a corner away from people and I was struggling. I was struggling to walk and I was struggling to stand. My partner at work let me know how bad I looked too. I apparently looked like a frail old lady. Which was nice.

So I went home. My boss is like "wait where you going?". I guess in her defense she came equipped with a bunch of throat lozenges for me but I didn't have a sore throat. I have no energy and cant breath. So I'm going home. I dont work tomorrow btw.

#healthcareworkers #imsick8(#dailydoodle #artblog

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mccoys-killer-queen · 5 months

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Meeting Lawrence Gowan: The Complete Saga

Okay so I still keep thinking that this happened only 2 days ago but it's been almost a week now so I figured I owe you guys a summary of what happened last Tuesday (plus this story didn't even reach its conclusion until yesterday so it's good that I waited to tell)

firstly: this was my first time outside of America and I did it solely so I could go to a Gowan show (because the Gowan material is only known in Canada so he only tours there) so I was willing to do whatever it took to get as much as I could out of this.

I had befriended a local couple while waiting in line for the show, we sat by each other during the show and I asked them if it's easy to go around back to try and meet the bands here and they were like oh yes we do it all the time here so they showed me afterwards

the show was ABSOLUTELY incredible like it was just so much fun there was so much chemistry between Gowan and the crowd and UGH everyone had a blast it's easily one of my fav concerts of all time

after the show me and this couple went around back and talked to some of the roadies and the opening act

the roadies said it would be at least 45 minutes to an hour before Gowan came out. I was willing to wait. I came all that way so I was gonna be insane and try my chances

the couple left, I remained. No one else remained.

it was COLD it was 19 degrees (-6C) but it wasn't bothering me too much

i started waiting a bit after 11 and it wasn't until exactly midnight that something happened...

people who worked at the venue came and went, everyone def saw me waiting in the alley/parking lot behind the venue (which was small btw) but no one spoke to me the whole time or caused a fuss or tried to kick me out thank god,,, i know how I looked

at about 11:57pm i looked up at the full moon and took a picture of it. I had said to myself I was gonna wait until midnight then head back to my hotel, so I was starting to feel a little low as the time drew near. I wasn't ready to head back just yet.

Less than two minutes later, the back door of the venue opened again, but someone propped it open, and several people filed out

one of them was Larry

***

immediately I took a step or two forward and just went "oh my god-!" because I genuinely could NOT believe that he was actually there- thirty seconds before that moment I was losing hope and THEN-

of course I awkwardly said hi, Larry smiled real big and said hi back, and he went "You must've had a good time, you were right up front!"

I told him that YES it was the best

He gave his bags to someone else to put in the van (or he put his stuff in the back of the van I don't remember exactly) and said he'd be a minute or something like that

"You must be freezing!!"

"I am! :D sorry, I'm crazy, but i came so far I figured I'd try anything to meet you"

he was right in front of me and had like the BIGGEST smile on his face the entire time he is so cute I still can't breathe

we're like the exact height he's shorter than I expected and while looking into his eyes right in front of me I just COULDN'T FATHOM THAT HE WAS RIGHT THERE like it was SO surreal and I was IMMEDIATELY face to face with him and it took me a moment to get a grip bc in the back of my head i was just constantly thinking "no WAY this is actually happening holy shit"

he asked me my name so I told him and he was like "nice to meet you, Rachel!" so I went "nice to meet YOU"

i also said the cold wasn't too bad for me because I'm from Pennsylvania, to which he mentioned their one manager guy is from Philly

i told him where i live in relation to Philly and he asked exactly where I'm from

i told him the exact name of the town I live in, then struggled to describe its location bc i live in bumfuck nowhere

i asked him if he's heard of this type of beer that's made close to where I live and he kinda awkwardly shook his head and I was like "that's just what I always ask people when I'm really out of town and trying to describe where I live"

he asked me how I got to Ottawa and if I drove (I did not, I flew in from NYC)

somehow I wasn't TERRIBLY AWKWARD i think I did great ngl

he must've said the words "you must be freezing" at least 3 times and i'm not even joking like him being concerned about my body temperature is a running theme in this story you can't make this shit up i swear i have photographic proof just keep reading

i couldn't stop looking into his eyes and smiling and it felt so wonderful just to look at him and it just felt so suddenly intimate overall I wonder if he felt it too, like it just felt as if it was so right, like something in the universe had finally aligned and something secret and sacred was happening or maybe i should just shut up

i don't remember the PRECISE order this convo went in like we talked about a few different things in a VERY short amount of time i stg it felt like we spoke for 5-10 minutes but it was literally like 2

did I mention he is literally so adorable

i thanked him for taking the art print at the very end of the show (you've all seen my Gowan piece) and told him it made me so happy and he was like "you did a great job!!! now did you make that?"

I was like "yes I did make it!! I also made one of Tommy and the Styx instagram page shared it and Tommy actually saw it which was really cool!!" and he looked so happy i would die for him

he said to me "I don't know how you got the- piano stand to look like that...!"

i told him that wasn't even the hardest part- that the hardest part was drawing his pants because they were so wrinkly

he thought that was really funny (I am going to get such a good grade in Gowan. Something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve)

i told him I was at the Allentown show for Styx back in August and he was like "oh really?" and I said that I was the only one in a Gowan shirt

to which he said "ahh so I definitely pointed you oot then" (yes his accent slipped through I couldn't believe it)

I told him that yes he pointed me out right at the first song and I'll never forget it (I'm such a fucking dweeb)

I said "I swear I feel like I'm the only Gowan fan in America sometimes" and he said someone at the show tonight was from California which made me go "really??"

he told me the Gowan records were never released in the US (which I did not know)

so I told him that despite that, I do have two of his albums and found them somehow, but they're stamped promo copies

I told him he should do a small Gowan tour in the US- even if it's just for two people (referencing myself and the California person) and he just kinda sheepishly rolled his eyes and was like "ohh I don't know..."

he asked me if I got a pick, so I said yes bc both he threw one at me, his brother gave me one, and his son gave me a setlist

i don't remember how the convo ended, but eventually Larry said he was gonna head onto the van, so I asked if we could get a picture quick, to which he said something like "of course we can!"

he said "let's take it over here" and led me just inside the back door of the venue that was still propped open because he was like "let's get out of the cold" or implied that or something he's just sweetest like UGH

we leaned into each other, I held up the phone, IMMEDIATELY noticed my bangs got sucked under my beanie, said "god, you can't even see my bangs-" ripped off my hat, very quickly pulled my bangs forward, then took 3 photos of us.

I thanked him for the photo, and thanked him so much for taking the time to talk to me, and he said he appreciates me coming "all this way"

it was here that I wanted to hug him SO BAD he looked so huggable in his dapper coat and scarf tucked into it, but it didn't feel appropriate at the moment to hug him, but also i think he was expecting me to hug him ? there wasn't really an opening for it to happen and I don't think shaking his hand was a better option so I didn't try either. The photo and convo and just the overall ENERGY felt so intimate already- why push it? I just kept being modest and not overstepping any boundaries (he probably knows I was too shy in the moment to hug him)

as we walked to the van together, he said "I hope you don't have far to go"

I said it's a short walk back to my hotel

he said "I hate to see a young lady like you out by yourself this late"

and I was playfully like "I'll be fine- unless you wanna walk me there" like I was SMOOTH AS BUTTER GUYS

I said this as he was getting in the van, and he just got a little bashful and chuckled "I did not bring a big enough coat!!"

he wished me safe travels, said it was nice talking to me or something, and that he'll see me on the road

I'll be hearing "safe travels, Rachel!" in the back of my head for the rest of my life

"You too! Have a great night!"

***

then I kept walking away, refusing to look back because HGGGGHHHHHH IS HE LOOKING AT ME WHILE I WALK AWAY WOULD I EVEN BE ABLE TO SEE IF HE IS????

i just kept walking up the block and turned the corner and looked to see if anyone was around and i started RUNNING AND LAUGHING AND COVERING MY MOUTH AND JUMPING I had never felt so happy in my entire life I stg it felt like Singing In the Rain but in the middle of the night in Ottawa

I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO TELL ANYONE WHAT JUST HAPPENEDNEWORFNWRONQR

i knew I couldn't tell anyone straight away- because there was one person who needed to hear from me before anyone else did-- Larry.

the second I got back to my hotel, i immediately sat in the lobby, pulled out my phone, and texted him that I got back safely. I figured I owed it to him- especially because he seemed so concerned for me, the sweetheart

i went up to my room, and holy shit.

I got changed, threw myself on my bed, and thought about how I'm gonna tell everyone that I just met Lawrence Gowan ????

I took a selfie of my "nobody knows I just met Larry" face because secret secret I've got a secret it was such a funny feeling dfoigndfogefeogvso only I knew that the most incredible thing in the world had just happened, and I wanted to hold onto that moment for just a littttle bit before I told anyone else

I sat up and opened up insta, instinctively went into my DMs, and saw "Lawrence Gowan- seen just now" and then-

this motherfucker was texting me already, half an hour after we spoke in person

I got up and stood at my window and just started sobbing (but no tears came). This was the greatest moment- the greatest feeling on earth- and I never wanted it to end. Six months ago, I didn't even know this man's name, now here I am, in a foreign country, having him text me in the middle of the night after we just met in person. If you told me six months ago that i would be in this situation with "the piano guy you saw with styx at m3", that we would have history together, that he would quickly mean so much to me, i would've been like "holy SHIT ? ?? what HAPPENED??"

I checked his message-

this motherfucker really is concerned about me getting warm, huh

I sent him a quick "back at ya!" and that was that.

I quickly got some photos edited the next morning and posted them to my story (he shared them!) and shared the photo of us together (which he liked and sent his dumb little avatar in reply to as always gkjnfdogwnergw)

i had this sinking feeling that i needed to tell him more- have him understand better just how much joy our little interaction sparked. I decided to text him again the morning I went back to the States (something a wee bit lengthy and thought out) letting him know that as my first foreign trip came to an end, he made me feel so welcome in a place where I had not a single person who knew me or was glad to see me (except for him!) I told him a bunch of things, most importantly that he should know how much he's loved in America (at least by me)

days went by and he never opened these messages- until yesterday.

this motherfucker REALLY WANTS ME TO STAY WARM HUH

anyway this is the single most sweetest text i've ever gotten i want it framed on my wall tattooed on my face woven into my DNA etc and this man is the only true gentleman i've ever met

moral of the story is i would die for this old man but what else is new also i spent $600 this morning on a Styx ticket so I can be close to Him again at the end of July goodnight <3

#gowan #lawrence gowan #styxposting #styxblr #my photos #i feel like we could be good friends tdsfvdfomptmtg we're the same breed of A Bit Silly #concert log #concerts

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yuukei-yikes · 1 year

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Ok after your whole “shintaro misogyny” “shinaya?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??????!,!,?,?,?,?,?,,,” rant (loved btw, Jin stop making ur female characters rely on male counterparts, stop making your male characters hate women or believe they are incapable challenge), how do you feel about Kanoshin. I know you have talked about it before but like, idk, talk about it again lol.

Kano “I can fix him” Shuuya? Or Kano “I can make him worse” Shuuya.

JQKEOEKDWODIEID MY WHOLE "SHINTARO MISOGYNY" AND "SHINAYA?!?!?!?!?" thats so funny i didnt MEAN for it to be a rant. i was just venting 💔 BUT THANK U FOR LOVING IT BC I FUCKING LOVE TALKING ABOUT THAT BECAUSE I HAVE SO MANY BOTTLED UP FEELINGS.

man. kanoshin. i dont think they're an i can fix him or i can make him worse duo. i dont think they are together FOR each other, they're together for their personal gratification if that makes sense??? at least that's how it starts. like they rly feed off of each other's worst coping mechanisms and validate themselves thru that. but through doing this obviously cant help to get to know each other and shintaro is pathetically laughing at kano's jokes and kano is pathetically kicking his feet and twirling his hair at shintaro groaning pathetically on the ground abt god knows what (NEVER forget this novel 7 moment)

also its so funny how often in the novels shintaro just physically throws himself on the ground to start moaning and groaning whenever he gets embarrassed. he's such a fucking freak. like who the fuck does that

shintaro and kano in the seventh novel are so insanely gay it's SO fucking good. THE BIT WHERE SHINTARO SMILES AT KANO AND KANO'S LIKE HUH...THAT'S HOW HE USED TO SMILE AT AYANO... HE ALWAYS HAD THIS SPECIAL SMILE FOR HER, AND NOW HE'S SMILING JUST LIKE THAT TO ME... like GIRLLLL *EXPLODES THEM WITH MY MIND* there is seriously no heterosexual explanation for any of that. god the seventh novel is so so so good. all of them are so good i wonder why it's the least consumed kagepro media they're SUPERIOR. the novels my #1 forever i fucking love them.

anyways. im normal erm kanoshin hehehehehehehhehe i think they're both far too terrified and disgusted abt their feelings for each other to consider stuff like "i can fix him" or "i can make him worse" YOU GET WHAT IM SAYING??? on this subject specifically, shintaros self hatred comes from well everything bitch hates himself but if we're talking abt kanoshin. 1. its ayanos brother. even if we dont even look at shinaya ever being romantically involved in the first place, THIS IS WEIRD TO HIM. 2. internalized homophobia arc☝️☝️☝️🙏🙏🙏👍👍👍👍💯💯💯

the fic i drew fanart of a couple days ago is SO *EATS IT EATS IT EATS IT* or also a soulmate au that i havent read in aaaages and also never finished but in that one shintaro was already out as bi... sadly both are aus WHICH DOESNT make them bad, aus are awesome but the things I'd do for content like that set post str. please. *bite bite bite bite bite* srry i bring these fics up cuz hehehe internalized homophobia shintaro is so good

maybe kano would eventually set for i can make him worse but it's in an attempt of scaring shintaro away. he's like im gonna self sabotage so much to make sure he stays away from me but shintaro is STILL here looking pathetic and kano's like god DAMMIT. erm. yeah.

btw now for me being crazy (tw me using shintaro as a stress toy to make me laugh): i think post str shintaro is not AS BAD with being absolutely fucking insufferable abt his whole guys rule girls drool thing because my man's had a little time to grow (ignores shinaya chapter in the eighth novel so i don't go insane with anger). i think post str shintaro makes 1 sexist comment and the entire mekakushi dan just fucking freeze for a moment. and give him an intervention and force him to say im sorry women and ever since then is more mindful of his actions. sorry i have to be delusional and believe this or else I'd just fucking hate his ass. im sorry shinaya i love you but *burns novel 8 shinaya chapter*

shintaro's messy relationships post str is my favorite stress toy btw. relationship with ayano crumbles. starts WHATEVER THAT IS with kano. in the self hatred confusion and internalized homophobia and etc the situation causes him (situation being gf dumped me bc im selfish so i hate myself / i kissed a boy a couple times so i hate myself) he desperately turns to the next closest Female(?) Counterpart with the following thought process "Pfff well i am so straight and SO capable of holding a normal relationship and i can PROVE IT there is one person who is 1. girl enough 2. apparently okay with me being a selfish asshole and consuming all their energy with my bullshit". so the solution is obvious to shintaro. just date takane.

turns out hitting on your best friend who also happens to be ur other best friend's gf is not good for either one of these relationships. so his friendship with not only takane but also haruka crumbles too in response and its so awkward. takane bc 1. i dont feel this way abt you and I'd treat the situation sensibly if i didnt know you well enough to know you dont actually like me that way and ur just taking me for granted like youve been doing all this time which WAS pissing me off and on its way to eventually explode but THIS....??? and haruka 2. YOU JUST HIT ON MY GIRLFRIEND?? (shintaro would be like maaan why did you tell haruka. and harutaka are like *slam door on his face*) situation drives shintaro to possibly end up kissing kano again. 🤨

its so hilarious. to me at least. ITS FINE he will get over it and makeup with everyone but i like making him suffer 👍 this is what you get shintaro. What do you have to say to the women in the world. apologize. say im sorry women. say it. say it and I'll leave you alone. sorry i went a little crazy in the end

#ask tag #headcanons #sorry. shintaro in agony bc ayano dumps him and in agony bc he likes kano desperately hitting on takane is A HILARIOUS CONCEPT #ayashin divorce

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alchemic-elric · 2 years

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Lots of really nice and super kind people replied to your post

Guys I have been setting here trying to process all because you’re so kind and I have been so scared to talk about it. I don’t know why but I just was. The person in question is one of my best friends and she said it mainly because she takes cosplay photography and she was getting mad at me for always shooting the same thing but then she made the comments again when I was starting to just not book her for photos and go to other people.

It’s killed my love of cosplay which is saying something I’ve been at this for 17 years straight and I just - it made me not feel good enough because she didn’t just say it once, she said it three times throughout the course of the year. The thing in question I’ve been trying to cope is rather heavy and most of you know what it is by now, I’ve never been shy about hiding it.

It was like back in those high school days when someone made fun of me for loving something so much. I love things with my whole heart and soul and like it’s my turn to write camping trip right from and it’s kinda driving me crazy that I can’t. I kept trying to tell myself this was something small and not to worry about it but it really hurt me and I dunno having so many of you say something, including those i’ve spoke too a while ago on disco kinda makes me feel a little justified that I did think it was rude. Everyone else seems to love my cosplay, I don’t see what the problem is?

I got told it makes her portfolio look bad if it’s all the same cosplay even though I’ve done different versions of him, bloody fucked up make up included. Like if you don’t want to shoot him just say no, don’t be rude about it? It’s the feeling of never being good enough I think and I just started doubting myself. I need to watch the series (again; even though i basically have it memorized) I need to find him again even though he’s there. He’s there and he’s so loud and he’s always just there. (That poem last night got written in a couple minutes because Ed just roared)

I dunno I guess I’ve also just been on Kumo so much because it feels safe. I adore that cloud don’t get me wrong and I am overjoyed i have so many people to interact with him now but Kumo also just feels safe. I made him so crossover friendly too to be able to interact with everyone. I know my ed is weird and not like most of the fandom sees him and I was getting hate from time to time - i deleted it a lot - so Ed just I dunno I just went somewhere safe.

Guys it hurt. I love him and I was so excited and I was just ecstatic and I was in costume when she said it. ALL THREE TIMES. It felt like such a slap to the face. I’m trying to find him. If I wrote you small things you can always reply to asks and old whatever what not, there’s no time limit on things. There never is with me on any of my blogs, but Ed and Snow... they’re just my babies. I love them so so so much.

but I haven’t drawn Snow since February because I felt like people were sick of that too. I drew him/ Ed constantly and I guess I just didn’t want people to get burned out on me.

#ooc || mun speaks #tw; long post #tw; personal things #tw; depression

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carlotaflaneur · 4 months

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#7 december 2023

hola !!!

I hope you're well (as well as possible, we won't ask for more won't we?)

I'm feeling really well, and that makes me super happy. October and November were full of work and stress (both good and bad stress) and I was a little bit scared of December: I was afraid of stopping, not having more concerts before me and thus having more time to THINK ! hahaha. But fortunately it felt good to stop. I have the feeling that I'm enjoying my concerts with hindsight: I'm enjoying these autumn months now, feeling proud and lucky of what I've done.

Once more, I perceive that when I stop I can become aware of how fast we all want things to develop and bloom. I also realized that I'm in a rush when it comes to feeling sure and convinced of the decisions I make within my project.

This autumn I've played a whole lot; almost every weekend I had 1 or 2 (or 3!) gigs. In the process I felt accompanied by this rush: this need of things turning out fantastically and living my career fully convinced, feeling certain that my work is valuable. Now that I've stopped I clearly see the value is and has always been there intrinsically; the things I'm doing are beautiful and valuable for themselves, regardless of the places they will potentially take me. I can see it clearly now: I stare at the intense blue of the Barcelona sky and think: if I die tomorrow I will be at peace........ I have expressed everything I carry inside, I feel so full !

november 2023 – with Artur's telecaster in Sevilla (photo: Dani Poveda)

On the 24th of november I went to Sevilla to play for the first time. It was a last-minute thing; turns out VIDA festival was setting up a showcase and Clara Peya couldn't play, so I went there to fill in her slot lol. Had I known some years ago that I'd be covering Clara on a line-up........... crazy. I'm so glad I took the chance because I had so much fun. I spent a lot of hours in the high-speed train (which I love) and I could go sightseeing with Artur and Biel and Oscar and Gerard and Ferran (socunbohemio). I shared a room with Carla from VIDA's record label and she was really warm and welcoming. It was like a little autumn-camp experience; I could also see my cousin from Sevilla :-) during the concert I felt really really happy; my songs were floating away from me on their own, I felt really privileged to be playing so far away from home and I could float along (and that's hard !!).

On the next day we were playing in Reus with Paula Jordi and Marcel (my band) and it was real fun in spite of my tiredness state haha. We had a wonderful dinner in an ateneu, and I met Greg who drew us (what a talented person). I also met a kid (I forgot their name nooooo) who came by to tell me we sound much better that the tyets (they're the most popular catalan band at the moment). I had such a laugh, I love to know how kids perceive my music. That night I could also talk to a couple who were seeing us live for the second time; they'd come to Altacustic in summer 2022, and they'd been waiting for us to play around again because they wanted to repeat. Things like that make me want to sing on and on til I'm old and leave the planet.

The last concert of the weekend was in the Jazz Cava in Vic. During that concert I could fly, I dunno how I did it. I was able to put the focus in my music so much that it felt like the concert was 1 minute long. In the middle of the set I asked the public "how are you doing?" and someone said: we're in your magic bubble. And that made me really happy........ when I grow up I just want to create bubbles.

On the 30th of november we finished the tour in Heliogàbal, here in Barcelona. That day I had more difficulties to sing inside the bubble, I was really nervous and we had problems during the soundcheck so I wasn't fully comfy. I could't find the space in my throat, I was finding it difficult to sing because of the mix of emotions... but we carried on and it went well. The room was full of friends and also LOTS of strangers which fills my heart in so many ways... I loved that Patricia Atzur opened the set; it felt special to have someone supporting me. I don't know... to think of the packed room, hearing you sing my songs.... it makes me want to express myself more and more. It makes me think maybe I'm not the only one who feels moved by my songs !

That night I was given a song in a cd as a present... I will never forget it. No one had ever written a song for me before (not that I know!) and receiving it on such a special day makes it memorable. I'm used to writing songs but not to receiving them !!! it's such a big thing and such a valuable gift that I needed to finish my letter sharing it with you.

I hope 2024 brings plenty of good things to all of us; health above everything else. I'm so happy to say I'm feeling great. Sending you hugs and hoping to see you next year. Thousands of kisses.

Carlota

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dashawfrostart · 6 months

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This Week In "Time & Again" #1: Vector Bubbles Struggles, and More!

In the previous "pilot" post of "This Week In 'Time & Again'" I only briefly mentioned that the page templates for Chapter 5 have been totally complete. I have to confess: while I was working on scattering speech bubbles all around, it suddenly dawned on me that I was doing it all wrong before 🤦‍♀️ The vector designer in me totally failed... And I will gladly reflect of my past silliness in this post! But first - a little bit of a backstory.

Fun fact: starting Chapter 1 from 2020, usually I tend to create speech bubbles in Inkscape. Usually I used elliptic shapes to make geometrically perfect speech bubbles. In Chapter 3, however, where real crazy stuff was happening in Lothar's part, I wanted to make speech bubbles more irregular, crooked, and at times shaky, and thus, for the first time, I simply drew oval-shaped speech bubbles by hand. Same went for Chapter 4 that also required a more lively, jolly, imperfectly shaped speech bubbles, too - as seen on the picture below.

Starting from Chapter 5, which is supposed to change the atmosphere of the story dramatically, I decided to spring back to the vector speech bubbles. For the sake of seriousness, let's say. I do not always like it when the speech bubbles are extremely geometric. It just doesn't look right to me. Either the empty space in between the text and the outer edge of the speech bubble bothers me, or the absolute perfection of the shapes. I can't really explain that, but it makes me feel weird. For Chapter 5, I decided to aim for more or less perfect shapes, but with a little skew where applicable to make the near-perfect oval shape cling to the text nicer. So I ended up converting the shapes into paths and just manually adjusting the points I need!

As you can see on the pictures above, that shape is not a perfect oval. I could even make it look like a broken egg yolk, need be (just like on the picture to the right) 😅 And that's a very simple solution to my weird problem, right?! Just a couple clicks here and there, and an extra pull on the handles - and here we go, awesomeness! Looks good to me!

... The funny thing here is that this extremely obvious solution didn't hit me until a few days ago. I totally could've used the same method while I was working on Chapter 4, too... But instead, I spent extra minutes and possibly hours trying to draw non-shaky misshaped ovals by hand, sometimes going back and redrawing them numerous times because I didn't like what they looked like. Dammit! 😅

Sometimes we don't see something even when it's right in front of us! Well, now I'm certainly a pro 😁 (at not seeing the obvious things, too, ahem)

I think I will keep doing that for the rest 4 chapters until the end now, because it looks very good, very easy to do and it's quite efficient.

This time, once the speech bubbles were successfully placed in their respective spots according to the sketches and storyboard that I previously drew on paper, I decided to follow a slightly another path - also for a reason. I saved the frames for each page, empty speech bubbles, and the voice lines all in separate files so that I could layer them on top of each other later on in Krita. That wasn't a decision made for the sole purpose of convenience; it was made this way to potentially ease my future rearrangement of the frames and speech bubbles into a form of a webcomic. I've never done that before, ever. So that would be my first experiment with this format. In fact, I'm gonna do twice the amount of work this time, for so far I'm planning on making Chapter 5 to have both versions: the regular letter format page-by-page comic (it will later be posted on my Itch page as a PDF), and the long vertical scrollable webcomic/webtoon. Am I crazy? Well yes, I am! 😁

Perhaps I will elaborate on the choice of format as well as on the decision of such a personal challenge later on, in one of the next "This Week In T&A" posts.

Aside from that, some other important stuff has been done by me within the last few days.

For example, I've increased page resolution by another 1/3, which hopefully will give me enough space to fit in even the smallest of fonts I'd like to use. Since the continuation of this weird story is planned to be quite wordy, I think expanded limits would allow me to nicely and conveniently accommodate the characters, the backgrounds, and the voice lines all together. Neat-o! ... Which is very interesting considering I'm planning on making a webcomic format version as well, so the changes I've noted in the paragraph above might sound counterproductive to some of you. Knowing that webcomic format is usually pretty low-res... But you'll see what I have in mind later 😉.

And finally - I was able to sit down and draw on my tablet for the first time in a few months. Yep, you heard me right. I sometimes draw by hand in my sketchbooks - however in the recent years I've been doing that primarily when sketching WIP designs of the characters for the upcoming chapters, and the storyboards. But I always draw on a graphic tablet whenever I need a complete, full-colour artwork. It's been a long time since I drew anything last time, for I've been working hard on the script above all else... But it sure feels good to return to self-expression in a colourful visual form after such a long break! You can even say, Frosty's back in action! Wheeeee! I have a few random, somewhat creepy artworks with Lothar in my head that I'd like to turn into promos and nice design elements for my websites and the social. And they're gonna be creepy not because Halloween is getting close, nope! But because the next chapters require a bit of spook in them by default! Anyway, no reason to spoil anything for you right away.

But here's a little sneak peek for you anyway! Gotta fuel up the readers' interest somehow after all 😉

That would be enough for now! See you soon! 🙌

#This Week In Time And Again #TimeAndAgainbyDWF #graphic novel #wips #vector

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