#2 i will delete because they are from the start and just aren't interesting to me. two i might post and then there is this weird mess
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ONE YEAR OF FLOWER&BLOOD
✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙
Exactly one year ago I posted my first chapter of the My Best Friend series. Nowadays I think it's something awful and I don't even try to edit it because I'd have to write everything from scratch, but I've left it for people who feel attached to the story. I remember getting about six likes and one comment on the first day and that huuuuge interest made me eager to create chapter 2 and then all the others.
I remember the excitement with which I waited and then replied to comments, not believing that people were actually waiting for the next chapter. At the time I was literally not following anyone, which was good because I wasn't comparing myself to anyone.
Eventually I felt I was ready to try writing other series and a few were successful enough that I decided to stay here permanently and create because it made me happy. Up to that point, everyone had been very kind to me and I started following more and more blogs, wanting to feel part of the fandom, to make friends with everyone. Now I know that was the biggest mistake I made.
Seeing things that didn't interest me, fanfic's whose way of writing couldn't draw me in, I felt frustrated, while at the same time fearing that if I stopped following someone, that person would see it as an affront. At the same time, The Impossible Choice, my biggest project until The Fall from the Heavens (which I'm currently editing and re-editing, while inserting on AO3), began to be written.
Just when I thought I had reached the pinnacle of my abilities (which wasn't true), I also started to clash with anonymous hate messages, probably the worst of which were those vilifying me and my husband, and those regarding my one-shot with Micheal Gavey. I know now that taking it personally and getting involved was my big mistake, and the fandom was shaken by drama that got out of hand.
I was a few steps away from deleting my blog at the time, but my husband talked me out of the idea (thankfully, as my stories aren't saved anywhere else − I'm only now moving them to AO3).
That's when I first realised that some people here I don't even like, and they probably don't like me. I wondered, why are we following each other then? Why are we pretending to have any courtesy? It was only later that I realised that to be considered someone's friend, you have to reblog their work and preferably agree with them even when they write hurtful things.
Since I've depleted my circle of those I follow to about 20 people, since I've blocked dozens of people and tags, there's been blissful silence (with the exceptions of when I write about behaviour in the fandom that I find toxic and someone accuses me of causing drama, but I'm used to it now). I've also never written happier than I do now.
Ideas come to me on their own, I don't feel uptight about what other big people will think of me, whether they reblog it, approve of it or not. I don't give a shit and life is beautiful! Although I can be emotionally unstable, I'm only 70 people short of crossing the next milestone of 3,000 followers, and that's BIG for me. It amuses me that I keep getting messages that someone is going to block me or stop following me, and you guys keep coming. It's gratifying.
I'm going to keep writing for you guys, and I'm sure during season two you'll also see my posts describing my impressions after the episodes in which I hope to involve my husband. I'll also keep you updated here on how I'm doing with my book I'm creating in my private life.
Apreciation
@ewanmitchellcrumbs
Ange. I know that sometimes I'm fucked up, but I want you to know that you've made this place so much more bearable for me that I can't imagine it without you. What I appreciate most about you is that you can talk and discuss, that you always try to understand the other side, that you are empathetic, warm and kind. I feel that, like friends in everyday life, we can also tell each other about things we disagree about, and there are not many people like that here.
On top of that, you are very talented and your stories are always a pleasure to read, even when they are short, you are able to build the plot and atmosphere perfectly, something I have always admired. Thank you for every kind word and understanding.
I still remember your first message to me via ask, referring to the fact that I didn't want to write a pairing with a mermaid because someone else was writing about it at the same time. My heart melted then, it was so nice!
@targaryenrealnessdarling
Liz, Queen of Angst! Your calmness and composure puts me in awe. You're disgustingly talented when it comes to writing and you have a super-sweet personality. When you started following me I began to squirm with delight, and when you started reblogging my stuff? My goodness!!!
@persephonerinyes
You've been engaging and reblogging my stories for as long as I can remember. Always involved, your thoughts make me smile. Thank you for being with me for so long!
@zenka96
You've been here with me since the dawn of time. You know that I love you. Your support from the very beginning really makes me feel like I have a friend here.
@huramuna
I am so proud of you! I remember your asks when I wrote Glass Cuts Deepest, your illustrations for me and your uncertainty about whether you should start writing yourself. I'm so happy for you and that you are so successful! You deserved it.
@black-dread & @aegonx
You are my favourite gif makers. Your work always leaves me in awe, you are amazing! I know how much work you put into it and somehow you make even the worst lit scenes look wonderful!
@summerposie; @0eessirk8; @melsunshine; @immyowndefender; @bellaisasleep; @kckt88; @thedamewithabook; @happinessinthebeing; @queenofshinigamis; @travelingmypassion; @mefools; @fan-goddess; @toodlesxcuddles; @ammo23; @troublesomesnitch; @mariahossain; @out-of-life; @apothe-roses; @heavenhatesme; @whitearemydarkestnight; @liv-cole; @blackswxnn; @echos-muses; @watercolorskyy; @at-a-rax-ia; @tssf-imagines; @snh96; @hiatuswhore; @exitpursuedbyavulcan; @darylandbethfanforever9; @the-dendrophile-bookdragon; @opheliaas-stuff @zaldritzosrose
Your comments and reblogs make me want to keep writing. You make me laugh, you comfort me and you support me. I know I'm definitely forgetting someone, but I want you to know that I love everyone who comments on my stories and there is nothing better for me than responding to your reactions and questions! I have known some of you for so many months that I truly consider you my good friends!
lottie-blue-star; aveatquevale-; aemondtargaryenwifey marvelescvpe; alphard-hydraes-blog; herejusttostan; li0nn3stuff; alexandrawho; vilmakamunen; angelinap09; theloveablestargirl; rose-blue-19; xxxkat3xxx; flosaureum; mandiiblanche; librawh0re; jasminecosmic99; ivvypg; rojocarnation; killmanduh; tokkiiidoll; wolfdressedinlace; angelofvivianne; nina2697; starwarsgirlsimmer1; katsucker; ipostwhtifeel; aemondsdelight; ilswemoon; tigrigri; pasta-rask; roselibrary; lystargs; gemini-mama; nikstrange; tempo-rary-fix; coffeeobsessedtrencher; gwuinivyre; dreamerbythewayx; diiickbrainn; mothmankit
And everyone else I missed and whose icons I would recognize from afar. I know that you have been with me for many months, often in silence or communicating anonymously. Your silent support and presence is something wonderful for me, knowing that you have been with me for so long and read all my posts!
Thankyouthankyouthankyou!!!!
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On Jack Bright (An Exhaustive Perspective)
[Edited 2/19/2024 w/ additional evidence!]
A couple disclaimers before I start: First, this isn't an "official stance." It's an explanation of my personal views; I speak for myself alone. Second, I'm not setting out to change people's minds or moralize to them; I just want to explain & respond to some common arguments in the fan space.
Third & finally, massive content warning for explicit discussions of grooming & sexual abuse. This includes screenshots. (I assume everyone is aware of this going in, but better safe than sorry!!)
Q: Why do you care so much, anyway?
A: Not your business, but I was groomed as a teenager in a very similar manner to the whole AB situation. Ok, on to the actual questions.
Q: First things first: Was AB/Duckman a groomer?
A: Yes, pretty definitively. First of all, DMs from one of their victims (who was underage while they were in contact; AB was aware of this fact).
[ID in alt text]
Maybe anonymous allegations aren't solid proof -- of course, there are public victims, but there are also screenshots of AB themself "joking" about being a sexual predator.
Straight up saying they want nudes from 14 year olds.
With the context of the first message -- the punchline is molesting/"corrupting" people who are underage (which they've publicly stated is a fetish of theirs)
This one just kind of... speaks for itself, I think?
[And again, ID in alt text for all these.]
These aren't the only examples, by the way -- just the most blatant. AB also explicitly wrote their interest in underage girls into tales on the actual wiki. Examples include the famed list, which implied Bright shouldn't be around people underage because he would come onto them (and that's without mentioning the blatant racism on there), as well as a now-deleted tale called 'Money, Money, Money' that involved in-depth description of a 13-year-old's breasts.
[Correction: my mistake, the tale was called 'Doctor, Doctor, Doctor.' You can find it here without the overtly sexual description of a child's body — it took 8 years (!!) for AB to remove these passages. Here's the original:
Highlighted in blue is the original edit history showing the article's content. Additionally, here's AB defending this on the talk page:
In addition to this, there's also AB requesting an artist draw incestuous rape porn — personally I find this far less heinous than a lot of the other stuff they've done, but I figure it deserves a place here too.
(iamnotadamnedmonkey is AB's old Tumblr handle, sorry for the poor quality screenshot!)
All new images also have alt text.]
Q: But AB is just the author. Why is the character bad?
A: A couple reasons. First of all, the character reflects a lot of AB's sexual proclivities, including towards underage characters, as I already mentioned in the previous point.
Second, Bright's popularity gave AB their social standing within the community. There are a few chat logs where they brag about people wanting to have sexual relations with them because of their work on the SCP wiki; also, it's pretty clear that creating something popular gives you access to a lot more people who are interested in talking to you.
When you manipulate fans wanting to talk to you into sexual relationships, it's pretty clear that you have the ability to access victims because your name is out there.
Thirdly, AB used Bright's amulet as a possession kink thing and would ask for nudes that had it visible. (And, you know, they solicited a lot of regular nudes too. What a great guy, who would totally never use their platform for their own sexual pleasure...)
Q: Right, but AB's not on the wiki anymore...
A: AB's publicly-spoken victims have politely requested that the character not be used anymore. Bright was used as a tool to access, manipulate, and engage in sexual contact with fans who were young and in some cases under the age of majority. Therefore, continuing to use Bright is disrespectful to their victims. Personally speaking, I also consider it to be disrespectful towards victims of grooming and/or sexual abuse as a whole.
Q: So you think people who still use Bright are bad people?
A: No, I don't.
Like I said, I think they're being pretty blatantly disrespectful. But I'm not the arbiter of morality or the censorship bureau. People can do what they want as long as it is appropriately tagged for.
However, the fact is this: if someone is publicly continuing to use Jack Bright, then they are doing something that goes against my values -- because my values involve supporting and respecting victims of sexual abuse.
I, personally, will not be comfortable speaking to them or seeing them in my internet space, and I'll probably lose a lot of respect for them if I had any in the first place. And since I consider my community to be a group of people who reflect my personal values and beliefs, I also do not and will never consider people who use Bright to be "part of my community."
You don't have to be a bad person to be doing something wrong, and I'll level with you: yes, I think promoting a known sexual offender & ignoring the requests of their victims is, in fact, doing something wrong. That's fine! You're allowed to do stuff that's 'wrong,' I'm not your mommy and I'm not going to call the thought police on you. But you should be comfortable with the fact that you're doing something that is going to upset other people. Using Bright will and does hurt other people, and that is not something that you can ignore.
I don't think anyone should be harassed. Obviously. I've received plenty of harassment for heading the rewrite project, and it sucks no matter who you are.
But I think people should get a little more comfortable with owning their decisions, instead of trying to argue that those decisions don't actually have any weight or consequences.
Q: But I can't control using Bright! [I have an introject of Bright/I have a DA to Bright] and it's not fair to act like I'm doing something wrong!
A: Sorry. Mental illness doesn't make you exempt from your actions having an impact on the people around you. I'll probably be more understanding if it's related to a mental health issue, but, y'know.
You don't have to do it in public. If you genuinely don't want to be hurting or upsetting other people, then you should keep your discussion of the Jack Bright character to private spaces, because otherwise you're still doing the thing you were respectfully asked not to do.
(I'm a system, just for reference. I understand. It doesn't absolve you of consequences.)
Q: I don't actually care about [your feelings/the victims' feelings], so this doesn't apply to me.
A: Cool. You can very easily block me, AB's victims, and anyone else who is vocally against using Bright. That's, uh, the point of the block button.
Q: I have something else to say that you didn't put in this post.
A: If you feel like being respectful or you have a genuine question, please direct yourself to the replies/reblogs/my inbox. If you don't, then please refer to my previous response. If you're blocked so you can't contact me, then, uh... don't contact me?
Ok, that's all my points made. Have the day you deserve, and hopefully it's a good one ❤️
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ykw the most frustrating part of that is. that's not even how halsin IS. as someone who enjoys him, even if i agree that he probably didn't need to be elevated to companion - he in no way indicates he'd be paternalistic about sex! at every point he just. rolls with it. he's not gonna be explaining consent or stuff unless asked specifically, he's gonna assume his partner knows what they want and trust that they will tell him to stop or change something etc. 1/
And you could argue that could make an INTERESTING dynamic with someone who’s still working through finding what they actually do like, and I mean in the ‘causing interesting issues’ way, if you wanted to go there, but having him just be a dildo attached to a self-help podcast isn’t that. And like it's p clear that he's CHILL about sex, not a walking sex textbook. 2/
He brings up a poly relationship and if you mention you have a partner he’s just like yeah duh I wouldn’t do this without their permission? and YOU get to say if you’re willing to ask them about it, he doesn’t tell you to or not. Doesn’t give you a primer on poly and how to approach it or anything. 3/
not to mention he has his own Extremely Fucked Up backstory about sex that he has obviously a) come to terms with and b) reacted very differently to astarion, but he’s maybe the most likely to understand the need for sexual agency without explaining it in therapy speak. he's got wisdom as his highest stat for a reason 4/
hell, if you go in with him to the drow twins with gale he doesn't even get all uwu consent about gale nervous bamfing out he's just like ‘oh damn, was hoping you'd show us what that wizard mouth do. Anyway watch me fuck your girlfriend and join in if you like :D’. anyway sorry for this essay but damn it annoys me seeing people flatten what could be interesting into 'uwu sad prettyboy gets railed by buff carebear speaking like a tumblr post' /end
railed by buff carebear speaking like a tumblr post YES THAT EXACTLY THANK YOU
i had a tangent in the post i deleted for being too tangental, but since you're allowing me the excuse: i COULD see astarion/halsin in a - they're both lowkey horny. they hook up. like play with the dynamics, you know? they hook up and it's only later halsin finds out about astarion's Trauma (because while he's generally open that cazador was a Bad Time, he doesn't actually go around advertising the specifics). let HALSIN freak out. he remembers his own backstory here, he starts worrying he Took Advantage, he gets all the tumblr takes about it. let astarion - very reluctantly, you know he doesn't wanna play therapist - be the one to lay down the rules. declare his boundaries and horniness.
like there probably IS something you could do with that premise. as little as astarion is inclined to carry anyone's emotional baggage, he does repeatedly, with durge, state he wants to be an equal partner, to protect and not be protected. i can actually easily see him warming to the role of "being needed" - when has anyone ever relied on him? expected anything from him besides a warm body? mind you, he'd probably be terrible at it, but i can see that appealing to him.
hell, you can EVEN make a case that halsin hasn't accepted his backstory as well as astarion. he kind of laughs it off. oh, yeah, it happened, it's over! astarion is actually pretty self aware that he's fucked up and disassociates and forces himself through sex. you could actually have a lot of fun with that in a fanfic. have astarion go "oh, no, you're probably a bit fucked up about that, aren't you?" and halsin be like lol no i'm fine. let astarion be the weird paternalistic one for once, i'm saying. as a Treat.
anyway tl;dr i agree with you. i wrote my little rant about astarion because i feel like i Get the character better, but honestly the dynamic is a huge disservice to halsin, too. what if he doesn't want to be a therapist??? what if he's not into it??? what if he just wanted a hook up with the local pretty boy, huh????
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Holy fuck, I just purged like over 2/3rds of my followers because they were all just sissy or trans-fetishizing blogs. Went from about 1500 to now less than 350. Cause of this I deleted all the pics if myself I've posted here, and don't intend to upload any more. I'll double check later on my pc if I deleted them all, it'd also be nice if anyone could dm me any that I've missed.
Going through all these blogs has made me feel so gross, I found so many blogs run by people saying they "want to fulfill their trans fetish one day", or sissy blogs that say they aren't interested in men or women, ONLY sissies. Like I don't have any problem with your fetish, UNTIL you start associating yourselves with trans people, or tagging your shit with trans people, or fucking CALLING TRANS PEOPLE SISSIES. I fucking hate it, it makes me so unreasonably angry. I just want them all to go away...
Not to mention, whenever I'd post pics of myself, the amount of unsolicited dick pics I'd receive. Holy fuck it's like I'm on grindr in all the worst ways possible. I even feel bad reblogging other trans peoples' selfies, cause now I just sick my fucking huge following of chasers, sissies and weirdos on people unintentionally.
So, from here on out, no more pics of me, if you see any pics of me please send me the post so I can delete it. I'm tired of blocking these people, tired of having the most unpleasant interactions with them. I'm just fucking tired of this. Why can't I just be on the internet in peace, free from fetishizing fuckers harassing me with pics of their cocks. Leave me the fuck alone.
My blog is just gonna be reblogging stuff I find funny, and probably more pics of my dogs. Feel free to unfollow if you wanna. 🤷♀️
#transgender#transfem#transgirl#lgbtq#trans#fuck off and leave me alone 😭#fed up with this shit#sick and tired of being fetishized
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Death In Paradise And How The Show or Shows Have Unknowingly Made Beautiful Autism Representation An Eassay By An Autistic Person
Introduction
I never get this personal or sappe but hi I'm Mel and just recently I got my Autism diagnosis. Recently I've been trying to discover who I am and what parts were just lies after realising i have been making and trying to imitate and please people my entire life.
I started watching Death In Paradise at the end of Season 10 my Mum had it on the tv and I thought it was interesting so I started watching. I then watched the first Christmas special and fell in love even more before giving season 11 a watch. Really loved all the characters and especially loved the characters, the visuals and the mystery aspect. Infact it made murder mysteries/who dunnits become one of my special interests. Started watching Beyond Paradise and some of the earlier seasons with Richard Poole.
Two things have made me realise why I probably love Death In Paradise since I have gotten my Autism diagnosis.
1: I was discussing the series finale with a fan who has sadly but understandably deleted their twitter account about how all the DI'S especially Neville when he was flashing back to the scene he was arrested found myself relatable as I replay my memories like that.
2: Martha's breakup monologue as heartbreaking as it was to Humphrey because she's absolutely out of line since they could adopt but her gut reaction is absolutely right. She has treated Humphrey appallingly not communicating with him about his feelings till that moment and not being honest with Humphrey resulting in him being dishonest in return. I am a people pleaser and will often think about others happiness before my own and Humphrey impulsively agreeing to move to Shipton Abbott is a good example as he really struggled setting in. Martha is right Humphrey is awkwardly nice to everyone even the police commissioner who I would have no patience with.
Now I realise that I am invested in these shows not just for the mysteries and the who dunnit element but to see Autistic people like me have human struggles in a very stressful job.
Even though I'm on a very different career path to all the DI'S as an Autistic person I think all the DI's are Autistic and show their own unique struggles. This is why I fell in love with the character of the Doctor to. If the DI'S aren't cannon Autistic they're definitely Autistic coded and it's my headcannon and I'm over riding the bbc on this one because when we see the way Autism is represented on screen within other white male characters I can see that Neville, Jack, Humphrey and Richard ain't no Rainman or Sheldon Cooper or Good Doctor which is why I feel so represented through these characters.
So with from what I've seen I would like to break down each DI that has been on the show and essentially justify why I have head cannoned all of the DI'S as Autistic.
1: DI Richard Poole
There are so many things that make me think he's Autistic I'm up to S2 Episode 7 of Death In Paradise as I'm wanting to catch up and as soon as this man came on screen I knew that there was no way in heck that Richard Poole is just neurodivergent grumpy english man as Camille would put it. One of the episodes I related to was Season 2 Episode 5 because if there's one thing I struggle with as an Autistic person its giving people the correct comfort they need.
Which links perfectly to my first point.
1: Richard And Emotion
Constantly throughout the first two seasons we see Richard struggle to communicate his emotions and hide how he's feeling. When sad things come up in s2 ep 5 and when he's asked to hold baby Rosie for the first time he struggles to display how he's truly feeling and how best to react. It shines especially when he asks Dwayne how he comforted Camille. I think Season 2 Episode 6 and Episode 5 was the first time we'd properly seen Richard sort of embrace the sand and open up emotionally.
2: Sensory Needs
Similar to Neville he makes it very clear that he does not enjoy the loud festivals on the island. He seems most comfortable up in his shack secluded reading a good book and chilling out.
He also seems to wear no summer clothes on the island as despite the heat he only seems comfortable with suits. Personally I struggle with being in bare t shirts and shorts so I can definitely relate to the fact. Richard seems definitely like one of those people who doesn't climatise for the summer and will not wear coats in the winter.
Overall an absolutely amazing relatable character.
2: DI Humphrey Goodman
I haven't gotten to S3 with Humphrey yet but I can also see relatable Autistic Representation in him. This is all based on from what I've seen in Beyond Paradise Humphrey wants to please and get on with everyone so he often hides his own emotions and puts others first. I can also see that he stims, forgets stuff if there's a change in routine and burnout hits him hard. I think he was partly burnout as the falling out with Martha must have been quite exhausting.
Masking is a huge thing with Humphrey so in my head cannon I think people including Humphrey have dismissed him being Autistic as just him being quirky. In my opinion the beyond paradise finale and episode five showed just how much Humphrey represses his emotions and then when it comes to burst it's bad.
1: Masking and Socializing
Humphrey throughout the beyond paradise series constantly tries to hide his uncomfortableness with Archie being around and his feelings about Martha stopping IVF. I know he came around and was sincere in the finale but I honestly think he wanted to pretend he felt ok with it so he wouldn't lose Martha.
Social wise he is also very awkward with people and struggles to communicate what he wants them to feel. Fights and conflicts seem to also exhaust Humphrey. Talking to Esther in Episode Five he admits he doesn't know how to feel about Martha not wanting kids and can't stop thinking about it. Infact he's so distracted by his fight with Martha that he can barely help Esther with the case. I'm often overwhelmed with socialising and go away to relax and think things through is definitely a coping mechanism I use.
2: Stiming And Info-Dumping
A form of stiming I picked up from Doctor Who was flapping my hands about when I'm talking and rambling. Humphrey out of all of the detective's seems to do this the most even when not talking about the solutions to a case.
He also is very passionate when talking about his special interests. I also think the way in the beyond paradise series he pictures the crime in his head and relives it whilst explaining it to Esther is very not neurotypical I view memories and emotions in my head like that sometimes.
Overall a very relatable character regarding his social skills and his need to people please.
3: DI Jack Mooney
This is going to be very short as I haven't seen much of Jack Mooney due to the fact I'm on S2 of my Death In Paradise rewatch but even the three episodes I watched whilst it was rerunning alongside Beyond Paradise I got very not neurotypical vibes from him.
The episode where he's rooming with Dwayne shows his struggle to interrupt other people's emotions, read social cues and understand the right moment to intrude on a conversation. It's absolutely hilarious when he just walks in on Darlene and Dwaynes date without considering that it's not an appropriate time. Not to mention when he interrupted Dwayne from his shower.
Through all three episodes I saw I can tell that he really struggles with grief so Florence is a good friend that he can consol. She helps him realise what stuff might make the shack feel more comfortable and friendly, like having a record player etc.
If any Autistic DIP fans want to reblog this and share their own thoughts about why they headcannon Jack as Autistic.
4: DI Neville Parker
Ah Neville Parker a character that I can definitely see myself in especially after season 12. Although I started watching from half of season 10 I still have enough reasoning to justify my headcannon. The way Neville organisises his meds and takes rejection from other people shows. Although you don't have to be Autistic to experience and anxiety Neville from what I've seen definitely overlaps with both.
Similar to Richard he seems to really struggle with the environment but at least have the sense to not where his blazer all the time and change into island built clothes off shift. Season 12 shows that Neville has adapted so well to the island that if he was put anywhere else like a prison cell its nerve racking and difficult for him. Not to mention from my own experience I've switched off when I'm sad or when something too difficult to process has happened and Neville does just that at the end of S12 through the Sophie or should I say Rebecca situation.
1: Lack Of Red Flags + Social Cues
Season 12 showed that because of Nevilles desire to have a relationship with someone and get over Florence he was unable to ignore the red flags about Sophie until he was in jail for her murder. Ok I'm pretty sure not all of the neurotypical Death In Paradise fans didn't fall for Sophies scheme but like Neville I truly felt no bad vibes from her until the very end. I haven't seen the red flags till to late and its costs me my mental health.
Neville seems to really struggle how to communicate his feelings as also seen by his crush on Florence.
2: Stimming + Special Interests
Throughout the show Neville is very rigid he fidgets and waves his arms about enthusiastically when he has found out who the killer is.
Throughout the show we can also see that Neville is a passionate reader and loves Star gazing. He was absolutely thrilled to info dump about the famous star gazer that has been unalived. We see he struggles with stuff outside of his limits and will glady lovingly share fun fact with his team.
3: Emotions/Shutdown
As mentioned Neville tends to become quiet when he's upset and shutdown. We can see throughout the case in episode 8 he's not entirely there till he confronts Sophie for the final time.
Neville insanely loses his enthusiasm and energy after he's arrested. If you look back he does not instigate any of the conversations whilst he's in the cell unless it's Sophie. Most people would react screaming and yelling when arrested but Neville is just too shocked to move. As an Autistic person I've had a shutdown only once but I definitely relate that if I was arrested I would just be frozen in panic not wanting to upset anyone.
Being quiet seems to be one of Nevilles best coping skills when something immensely stressful has happened.
Again when he had that freeze frame recalling when he was arrested and who could have switched the keys it seemed very relatable and not neurotypical. Not to mention a lot of Autistic people have a high sense of justice which could explain Neds fearless anger and frustration at the end of Ep 7.
Conclusion
I think even if coded having Autistic representation that's not cis white man super intelligent with no struggles is impactful its also why I want a black or biracial DI on the show as it would be even more impactful.
Honestly all the DIS being Autistic or on the neurodiverse spectrum as a whole adds to alot of the fish out of water element of the show.
I highly encourage reblogs as i assume I'm not the only autistic or neurodivergent fan of the show.
-Melody-
They/Them
#beyond paradise#death in paradise#humphrey goodman#neville parker#richard poole#jack mooney#beyond paradise spoilers#actually autistic#neurodivergent
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So in the script for the Trial they make it sound like PAKs are retrieved or are able to autonomously return to Irk after death so their data can be uploaded into the Control Brain database and then are reused, and I have some questions about that.
Like, what is death even for Irkens? We saw in the Virooz arc that Zim's PAK could attach itself to a chair when Virooz stole his body. At least part of him was able to live on in Zib when he attached Zim's PAK to himself, and it's implied in the 10 Minutes to Doom script that without taking some precautions first Zim would've taken over Dib completely and his body would've been destroyed. So, if the PAKs can survive without the body, can attach themselves to foreign objects and other living organisms and retain their memories and personality, and all Irken bodies are cloned anyway, can't they just keep plugging the same PAK into a new body every time one "dies" while the same brain lives forever? Like, you'd think that was the case if they reuse PAKs instead of just making new ones on an assembly line. But they kinda make it sound like that's not the case and they're actually setting them back to factory default before they plug them into a new Irken.
If it actually was the former case though, that brings up some interesting possibilities. Maybe the reason Irkens are so long-lived isn't due to them just naturally aging slower, but simply continuously uploading themselves into new bodies. Jhonen's always been very deliberate about not giving Zim a precise age other than "older than any living human" but fanon often low-balls it with the infamous claim that he is only 160. But what if Zim's actually like, several hundred or even thousands of years old? What if the majority of Irkens really aren't just naturally short and Zim really does have a child's body within the context of his society, even with thousands of years of life experience? The reason the shortest like him are looked down upon is because they keep getting themselves killed and had to be plugged into new bodies that have to grow up all over again while the Tallest are revered for staying alive in the same bodies long enough to hit puberty.
This might also explain Irkens' sense of superiority and cavalier attitude toward death and disregard for the well-being of others. For them, dying isn't permanent unless they get declared "Defective" and deleted. So they think they're better than other species because they've bested death, but also don't have any respect for how precious life is.
What if there was an episode with a reveal like the season 2 opening of the Venture Bros where we find out Zim's died zillions of times and that's why he stays so short. But like Hank and Dean, he's eventually able to keep himself alive long enough to not only start aging physically again, but start to mature as well. And maybe a later episode could deal with his safety net being gone. He's declared a defective, so if his body dies he can't return to Irk to be reincarnated. Then, eventually he does get himself killed again. Dib figures out he can use his father's 3D flesh printer to clone him a new body to bring him back, but he has to stop Zim's PAK from following protocol to return to Irk or he'll be erased and gone for good.
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Twenty Questions for Fic Writers
Tagged by my one and only Jesus @eusuntgratie
I recently cleared out all the ask/tag games in my drafts because I realized I'd reached the pile-up stage of putting things in there and not doing shit. Thanks to everyone who's tagged me in those the last couple of months and sorry I didn't get to any!
1. How many works do you have on ao3?
148
2. What’s your total ao3 word count?
2,005,606 (crossed the 2 million milestone recently and am still buzzing about it)
3. What fandoms do you write for?
I'm only writing for Jujutsu Kaisen, but I'm posting for Jujutsu Kaisen, Bleach, and MCU.
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
I was so sure it was going to be all MCU, but nope, it's a mix of MCU and Hannibal. God, that was my first Ao3 fandom, and my Hannibal fics are from 2014. It's surreal people are still reading/enjoying them.
if you're looking for jesus (then get on your knees)—MCU
i'm a ghost, you're an angel (one and the same)—MCU
A darkness seen and shared—Hannibal
Ways and Means—Hannibal
the hand you want to hold is a weapon (and you're nothing but skin)—MCU
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I do! I enjoy the interactions and discussions. Plus, since I'm not a Discord (or group spaces) person, it's how I find fellow fans to chat with, especially during my initial foray into a particular fandom. I do have a huge backlog of some 1.1k comments from 2020 to mid-2021 because I didn't have much time for fandom in that period. I'm chipping away at it slowly, but I'm pretty prompt about replying to everything on my post-2021 fics.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Hmm, this Hannibal fic, I'd say: Till the bitter end
Let's just say I predicted the series finale in some weird way.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Most of mine end happily—a few are ambiguous, while others are dark.
8. Do you get hate on fic?
Oh yeah. It's only happened with MCU and Jujutsu Kaisen, and they're mostly cases of overgrown children unhappy that I didn't write the ships or dynamics they want.
9. Do you write smut?
It's my specialty now 😎
10. Do you write crossovers?
Nah. I've done fusion-style AUs, but full-on crossovers aren't something I'd like to write. I'll read them, but I'm picky.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Multiple times (MCU and YoI, iirc), both within Ao3 and offsite.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Multiple times, for multiple fandoms! It's always a delight.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I did write one(1) fic that way, but it got yeeted into the void when my co-author deleted her entire Ao3 account. I have a copy, I think.
14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
I'm the kind of person who's most devoted to whatever is eating my brain at the time, so right now, it's Yuuji/Gojou from Jujutsu Kaisen.
15. What’s a wip you want to finish but probably won’t?
My writing superpower is that if I lose interest in a WIP, I also lose all desire to finish it and any guilt about it. And these days, I tend to start a fic and work on just that till it's done. So the answer is—none.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I write some smokin' hot porn, and I'm pretty good at threading character study through it. The porn is the plot, in most cases. I also enjoy doing background worldbuilding that serves to give the narrative a sense of depth despite the focus being on characters and relationships.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Fight scenes, ensemble casts, and sustained plotty plots.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
Ah, I can feel my Hannibal-era Google-translate Lithuanian judging me.
In general, I avoid it, but when I write for anime set in Japan, I tend to work in honorifics. My mother tongue has those too, so I know from experience that there are no English equivalents that capture the same vibe.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Hunter x Hunter, I think. That account no longer exists. On Ao3, it's Hannibal.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
I tend to be biased toward my newer works, so this keeps changing. At the moment, it's (let me be clear) every version of the story ends with you being slaughtered (JJK, goyuu).
Tagging (no pressure) 20 people because why the hell not: @possibleplatypus, @actualalligator, @joeys-piano, @cursedvibes, @backwardshirt, @m34gs, @naamah-beherit, @dragongirlg-fics, @crossroadswrite, @spacebuck, @jenroses, @calamitouskings, @knivash, @lo-55, @bookwyrmling, @sorrythatwasamistake, @ddelline, @lilyfarseer, @roughkiss and @deunan306
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I don't know if your still taking requests if you aren't ignore/delete this 😅 I just really love your writing and wanted to shoot my shot
Can I have reader who is a virgin and is bestfriends with love interest(s) and they confide in them that they could only have sex with someone they REALLY trust but later they ask "hey I know this is weird but I don't want to be a virgin anymore and I trust you to know you won't hurt me but can you be my first? You could say no and we could pretend this never happened but I'm just tired of being a virgin" if they end up being romantically involved is up to you
I want this with Din and Boba and Cobb Vanth (if you don't write for him that's cool) and Luke
Fem!reader x Boba, Cobb, or Din | 458k words
Content: virginity, propositioning a friend, short intro with links to full smut fics
Okay okay okay, this prompt made me go just a little bit insane, and I tried to do simple headcanons, I really did, but in the end I couldn't help but write out smutty one shots instead 😈
So let's turn this into a choose-your-own adventure thing. Here's an introduction to set the scene, and then you'll have a choice of what happens next, each leading to one of three characters - Din, Boba, or Cobb (sorry I couldn't find the inspiration to write for Luke in this scenario!) Pick one or pick them all!
[18+ only below the cut, please and thank you]
Your best friend sat at the edge of the dock, feet dangling off the side as he gazed out at the water twinkling in the moonlight. You stared at his back for a moment as you steeled your resolve. With a final, determined breath, you pushed yourself forward and sat beside him.
"Hey," you said with a nervous breathiness to your voice. He looked over at you in concern. "Scary today, huh?"
"Yeah," he agreed with a nod. You'd almost died in a firefight earlier that day. "Are you okay?"
"I am..." you said slowly, trying to find a way to transition into the script you'd prepared for yourself.
"What's wrong?"
You could never hide your true emotions from him. You looked over and gave a sheepish grin.
"This is going to sound weird, but there was something that occurred to me, when I thought my life was over. I thought... well, I thought what a shame that I was going to die a virgin."
You shifted to look at him square on and quickly dove into your speech, before he had a chance to react.
"I know, I know, it shouldn't be such a big deal. It's just that, I want that experience. And I want it with someone I know and trust. That's what's made it so hard to have happen. I haven't found the right person yet. And today made me realize that maybe I never will. Which is so not fair, because so many people have sex, no problem, so why can't I? Why am I holding myself back? Especially when..."
You faltered and averted your gaze, not wanting to see any part of him for fear you'd find him pulling away.
"Especially when... what?" he prompted. At least he was still paying attention and not completely repulsed by the awkward topic of conversation. But you couldn't really tell by his voice how he felt about it. So you took in another big breath and gave him a meaningful look.
"Especially when there is someone in my life I know and trust."
Silence. You swallowed hard, doubt starting to overtake you, regret at having gone through with this at all.
"I'm not looking for love or anything," you quickly threw out there, shifting yourself to turn back away. "And you can totally say no, and we can just forget I ever said anything. I just... I'm tired of being a virgin and I'd trust you to be my first, is all."
You looked down into your lap and swung your legs back and forth, hoping to heaven the heat in your cheeks wasn't actually visible. You might have just ruined a perfectly good friendship and all for what... sex? Were you really that desperate?
Option 1: "Darling" - But then you felt him move beside you; not away, but closer. Hope overshadowed doubt and you lifted your eyes...
Option 2: "Cyare" - The silence continued, save for the gentle lapping of water against the dock below. You felt your stomach twisting and tears brimming along your eyes...
Option 3: "Mesh'la" - At first, all you could hear was your own heart thumping in your ears. But then you realized beyond that, there was a low, gentle chuckle...
NSFW Every Character Tag: @dangerousstrawberrypie, @justanothersadperson93, @arctrooper69, @sleepycreativewriter, @techie-bear, @theroguesully, @cw80831
NSFW Goodies Tag: @kaijusplotch, @marvel-starwars-nerd, @lackofhonor, @flowered-bicycles, @mishakoon
NSFW Baddies Tag: @lemongingerart, @foodmoneyandcats, @nahoney22, @mishakoon
✨Join A Tag List Here!✨
🔥 Spice Time Master List | 🌙 Master List of Master Lists
#star wars#the mandalorian#the book of boba fett#din djarin#boba fett#cobb vanth#spice time#virgin!reader#friends to...tbd#intro scene
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Woke up to the sound of a very noisy but lovely Thunderstorm starting, and just kind of basked in it for a bit since I had the window above the bed open. Drifted back off and woke up again to my Husband shutting the window so I wouldn't get rained on. Couldn't get back to sleep again after that.
Probably a good thing, though, considering I went upstairs to use the restroom and my lips were blue again. Not a huge fan of it now starting to happen while I'm sleeping too, apparently.
We wound up sitting on the deck for a little bit, then opening up some of the windows again and turning on the attic fan to draw some of the nice cool storm air into the house; the air conditioner's broke again (motor's frozen up like last year. But at least this time it did it the week it's rainy so it's cool temperature-wise). It feels incredible.
There's a class at the nearest Metaphysical store that I found out about yesterday, that sounds interesting. It's about Finding Your Soul Path, and the way the blurb's written, it seems to be more on the traditional Shadow Work side of things. Which could be cool to go to and experience.
I sent the link to my old Covenmate thinking that it'd be good for her mental health; she hasn't been doing good mentally lately (in a long time, really), and we tend to talk about Shadow Work a lot together, so I thought it'd be nice to go to. I got an answer back this morning, though, that she can't go because she doesn't get off until half an hour before it starts (and unfortunately the store's an hour away from us). So that wound up falling through.
I thought about sending it to the other witchy semi-friend I have locally. But she's deleted her Tumblr and stopped talking to me, so I'm assuming that relationship is over (again)? She's also a lot more ... Snarky and negative? Very judgmental about a lot of things. And I have the feeling that a class about "Finding Your Soul Path" would be one of those things she wouldn't have much good to say about. I could also be really wrong about that, but 🤷♀️
Unfortunately, when I called my insurance company this morning to put my new card on file for autopay, I found my card for my next GP appointment. I thought it was in April, and I was very off. It's not until August. I'm going to try and make it, but realistically I'm very likely going to have to call and schedule one much sooner than that; I don't think I'm going to last that long between appointments with all of this exhaustion going on. Especially since it's now halfway into week 2, and Physio still hasn't called me back about my Therapy yet.
I bet insurance is dicking them around about approving it 😩 Like ... What do you want to bet they want me to do a bunch of unnecessary steps first before- even though Physio's usually the first step before they'll even approve those tests half the time?
I'm just kind of bumbling around today without a purpose. It's so hard to get myself to do anything lately. I'm just kind of in a depressive slump myself, honestly, with everything going on. It's so fun.
Tomorrow, though, I have a group event with my Guild in ESO. We're going to run the Imperial City Sewers; it's been forever since I've had a good run through the Imp City Sewers. And since my old Covenmate and I aren't going to be going to the class, I can still participate. I'm looking forward to it. If I'm lucky, I may even get my gorgeous Transmutation Violet back by running it.
#Personal#2024#Religion & Magic#Natural Connections#Alphabet Soup#Fibromyalgia#Potential ME/CFS#Unspecified Post-Covid Heart Issues#Depression#Things Go Boom#Elder Scrolls Online#Elder Scrolls Tamriel Online
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I had an anon in my askbox that was rudely asking me something along the lines of "why aren't you posting about Crosshair anymore" and I got mad and deleted it before figuring I should probably explain myself a little because all 860 of you did initially follow me for crosshair content so here goes:
So, like many of us, I am neurodivergent. I have intense, all encompassing hyperfixations that give me that ridiculous dopamine hit that we all know and love. Unfortunately, these hyperfixations have a shelf life (as much as I would prefer to be able to hyperfixate on a single thing for a long time and not worry about the enjoyment waning)
This means that in time, I struggle to connect with certain media the way I used to. If I set certain media to the side and then think about it a little while later, then I can sometimes get that rush back like I did when I first engaged with the media.
A good example of this is actually Hux and the sequel trilogy. Back when the sequels were new and exciting I was a feral Hux stan. I didn't have a blog I used back then so I just read fanfic on Ao3 and info dumped to my friends. (Lmao sorry guys)
But then the interest slowly waned, for star wars all together and I hyperfixated on other things, My Hero Academia, Haikyuu, Star Trek, until eventually my brain had enough of a break from Star Wars and let me get fully invested in it again.
Basically what I'm trying to say is, I would love nothing more than to still be fully invested in the Bad Batch fandom, but my brain will not let me feel the same way about it until I have a small break and think about something else for a while.
And like many of us, it was my comfort show. With my comfort characters. When the season 2 finale aired I was a mess. I'm not even a full time Tech fan but the way he went out broke me. It was hard to think about the show at all without feeling a whole slew of negative emotions, so I started rewatching rebels and the sequels to find a new comfort show and other comfort characters.
Look none of this makes any sense, but basically I'm sorry for the hux spam and lack of TBB content lately. It will return. I will come back to it, but its just really hard at the moment. I'll still finish off the requests once I am settled at my new house, but after that I probably won't turn requests back on for a while until I get over my negative emotions towards the show.
And before you hit me with the "but Hux died too" look i know, it's just easier to talk myself out of that one because it was so negligible in the grand scheme of the movie I can pretend he was helped into a bacta tank or something.
Look, if you got this far, thanks for reading my unmedicated ramblings. I'm sorry that the content you followed me for isn't happening as much anymore, but it will come back one day. When it's less difficult for me to think about.
Until then, enjoy the Thrawn posting and Hux posting. Or don't. I dont make the rules.
#rambling#venting i guess?#just too many words#tldr im neurodivergent and care about fictional characters an unhealthy amount
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//Okay so I put this up earlier but I accidentally put it up before I got off work and deleted it so these are the 3 new 'rules' I'm going to add;
I am going to start asking people to tag generalized complaints about fandoms like 'I can't stand how everyone in this fandom does [insert here]'. So far I am planning to black list 'tw; fandom complaints' and 'fandom complaints'. I'll probably also black list any special tagging people come up with. And no, I do not consider any variation of the negativity tag to count. I can go on a whole rant about this but I don't want to come off as hostile over something like this so tl;dr I am just not interested in seeing it on the dash and refuse to block people over it but would really appreciate anyone that will do me a solid.
I will not be doing shipping exclusives for romantic ships for the time being. Or if I do it will only be with EXTREMELY close friends, but even then it MIGHT be 1 or 2 people over the course of the lifespan of this blog. I figure genuinely shipping with me takes so long I weed out alot of people anyway and I don't like to be tied to down to someone that might disappear next week, nor will I expect others to be tied to someone that steps away from this site as much as I do. If I ship with someone that does that as a default and they want to do it on their end go for it but I most likely won't return the gesture.
This isn't really important but I forgot to put this up BUT I am duplicate friendly. Now when I follow I never really follow with the intention of myself and another person interacting with the same muse because I know alot of people just aren't into that kind of thing so I will usually let the other person to come me as to whether or not that would be something they want to do. But if anyone ever decides they want to do that I'm always open to it.
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How do you get into mcyt?? I’ve tried a couple times and I can’t really figure out where everyone’s finding lore? Any tips?
Oh hi. i dont even know where to begin, i've been really out of the loop. But i have recommendations. This is going to be long
DreamSMP
Well, the dsmp has gone to shit for many reasons.
But if you do get into dsmp, blueberrytv on youtube is your best friend, they cut streams down to more digestible episodes so you can follow the story along. Yes it's long. Dear god it's long. Also @relaxxattack has a carrd that updated until fairly recently, i also recommended it many times.
The story was (i never thought i'd have to speak in past tense about it, the fucker seemed to drag through for decades in just 2 years) told through livestreams, quite a few of are lost forever because twitch deletes vods after 2 weeks and no one bothered to back them up. Also ignore everything after the disc war finale except quackity (and tales of the smp)
You can test the waters by watching Wilbur's L'manburg war video to see if you like the vibes. I usually recommend this, though it's not the earliest point in the story. (that would be tommy's disc war, which is also VERY important, but people tend to find him annoying at first, esp. 2020 tommy like jesus christ he was a different beast. Definietly watch it after the L'manburg independence, things will click.)
Sad-ist's animatics are classics that helped shape the story as it was being written. Watch them as you progress through.
Hermitcraft + Adjacent*
*as far as fandom/content creator overlap goes
1. Hermitcraft is more gameplay heavy. If you don't enjoy minecraft you're not gonna like it, but it's pretty straight forward. You find a youtuber and follow their series on youtube. People usually recommend Grian, GoodTimesWithScar, and Mumbo for beginners, (they are the most popular ones) and then you can branch out from there. Hermitcraft recap is a godsent if you want to know what's going on everywhere.
I personally loved season 8, it's also the shortest and the most lore-heavy. Really gives you a taste of what the series is like at its best.
2. The life series! (Third life, Last Life, Double life, Limited Life) again, find any participant want, then branch out if you want to. Lore is easy to find here, people were under pressure to make up stuff quickly because the series is short, and the result is funny, creative, and so so tragic.
3. People watch EvoSMP for grian, pearl and martyn lore but it really doesn't matter to anything that's going on right now. It's a good series, but Watcher (basically evil angel Grian) headcanons are far detached from it nowdays despite originating from it.
4. Yandere highschool! Do not watch Yandere highschool. No detail is worth it. Use adblock if you force yourself through it, no money for the creator he's an asshat and the other members apparently no longer talk to him.
QSMP
Since the last post, Quackity started the QSMP, in which spanish and english speaking youtubers play on the same server. It has roleplay but it's looser and less grimdark than the dsmp thankfully. They are on an island and they adopted little eggs that walk around and act all cute. It's streamed on twitch. Pick a person and look up their vods, if you're interested. Slimecicle is recommended to start with, and some spanish creators use english subtitles/translation mods. There aren't comprehensive sources to find every vod/video yet, since the server isn't that old.
EmpiresSMP
Start from participants' youtube channels, can't tall you more. I never got into it, not my thing. However, a lot of people left guides in the notes!
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hi
I always felt kinda weird about the dps 'novel' and thought it was so strange how many people seemed to love it. (And how often nancy kleinbaum was credited for quotes she had no involvement in..)
Like.. i'm glad if people enjoyed it. But at the same time i was crushed that i couldn't form a connection with it? Because all i yearned for was a long and detailed book of dps, but the book we've got is just a (worse) version of the script, where all the characters feel off.. finally someone put into words what i had trouble articulating.
So... thanks!
(And if i may ask: what do you think of the 'deleted scene' where mr. keating comes to the cave? It obviously doesn't have much to do with the book (just like everything else it was part of the script), but for me personally it was the first time i had encountered it.. do you think it adds to the story or not?)
Anonymous because i have a horrid fear of being misunderstood :) have a nice day
anon you and i are on the exact same page. i think within the fandom it's generally disliked on some level, but i see a lot of people who aren't in the trenches with us who praise it. and it's like, i think they just like the movie, but quoting from a movie isn't aesthetic enough or something? so they quote from the book? idk i have never liked the book, i don't understand the appeal of it at all.
there is another universe where the dps book is what you want: thorough, detailed, maybe even expands on the characters in minor ways (like we finally find out what clubs meeks and pitts are in). unfortunately, we live in the darkest timeline
i have quite mixed feelings about that deleted scene tbh. there is some context to it and i even see the vision that schulman was going for when he wrote it. to my understanding, that scene where todd reads out his poem was supposed to be intercut with the scene of neil going into his father's office. it's a pretty sick juxtaposition: todd, the character who could barely form a sentence at the beginning of the film, is reading out his own poem to his friends! and neil, who started all his friends on the dps path after being inspired by keating, isn't there because he's committing suicide at home, ending his life because there is nothing to live for if he can't seize the day. the thing is, in the original script, todd's character arc was a bit more complete in my opinion. he stands up to mr nolan and his parents and he doesn't sign the contract which terminates mr keating. he see him put keating's advice into practice and the effects/consequences of that (for some reason, todd does not get kicked out of welton in the og script, not sure why). but in the film, he is presented with the reality of not being able to follow mr keating's advice (yet), so he has to sign the contract. thus leading to the epic finale of the film where he thanks mr keating for his lessons and then we just presume they all put those lessons into practice. (dps 2 me thinks). now, for the film, weir wanted that grim/tragedy ending, so he cut a lot of that stuff with todd out. it still works, just not in the traditional way.
in terms of the rest of that, like everyone singing and dancing together... doesn't really do much. again, it was supposed to be intercut with neil's suicide, but neil's scene is harrowing enough without seeing his friends not know what's going on with him.
so there is a world where that deleted scene works, but they deleted it for a reason.
if i could for a moment talk about knox's storyline relating to that scene. i hate that his relationship with chris comes to a screeching halt when neil commits suicide. literally, after the play, we don't see or hear from her again. in that deleted scene, they kiss or whatever. still doesn't really wrap it up. now i'm not saying i'm rooting for them, because i'm not. but i think it would have been interesting like.
okay imagine chris' boyfriend chet finds out that she went to the play with knox (or kissed him). and chet is furious so he marches up to welton, set on punching knox into the ground. only to be confronted with a guy whose friend just killed himself. and what if knox, much like todd in the film, relents. and says "you can have chris, i can't seize the day anymore, my friend is dead" and we see him lose. knox, who has been pining after chris the whole movie, has to give up. i think that may have just reiterated the point, so maybe that's why it's not addressed. idk it was just always odd that knox didn't get a proper ending. not that he deserves it.
i don't know if that actually answers your question or not. i guess in short, i don't really think it should have stayed in the film as it was, but i see how it could have worked.
end post lol
#dead poets society#dps#dps fandom#dead poets#dead poets fandom#dead poets headcanons#the dead poets society#me#answered
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Dear Sims 2 Community, part 2
Forewarning: Long post again.
I would like, first and foremost, to apologise to @sicksadsim. We have both talked our situation out in DM's and agreed to delete our posts sniping at each other. I was wrong to jump to conclusions about them and I deeply regret it. The person who originally posted the comments we were arguing about has deleted their comments and we have all agreed to start afresh.
Secondly, I would like to thank @jessica-ebadi for enlightening me a bit more on how racism works in Western countries. It was interesting to have a conversation with someone from the opposite side of the world and get to understand each other better.
Thirdly, since I was mainly talking about South-East Asian names and misconceptions in my original post, I have decided to make one about other cultures, nationalities, and ethnicities, and backgrounds! So here are a few below that I see being perpetrated way too much. Some are my own, some are from other people who have offered me their opinions.
Not all Indian people are dark-skinned. My own ancestors came from North India and that's why many were mistaken as Europeans during World War Two. I am tired of seeing people act as if all Indians must be dark-skinned.
Africa is a continent, not a country. Oh my god I hate this idea. I see WAY too many people in this community acting like Africa is a country rather than a continent. There are so, so many diverse cultures in Africa, so many countries, so many peoples! PLEASE stop generalising African cultures.
Not all people from one country have to be the same race, look the same, and speak the same language. This is one of those misconceptions in The Sims community that REALLY makes me upset. Most sims I see representing other countries than America are pretty much just the stereotypical person from that country. Every country has its expats, its foreign immigrants, and IDK, maybe people whose ancestors have lived there for decades but aren't what you would 'normally 'think are people who would live there. There are also mixed-race people too!
Karen are an actual race, they are not just your average 'I-want-the-manager' person from the West. You can read about them here and their story is heartbreaking. It literally drives me up the wall to see people, especially on Reddit, dismissing the plight of the Karen people because they share a name with a stereotypical rude person. Which isn't even pronounced the same. I am now informally starting a petition to change the name we refer to rude entitled people to something else.
Yes, Goopy GilsCarbo is a real name. It's a mashup of Goopy Rossi and Gabe GilsCarbo, who both worked on TS2 together. While I find it funny too, it's rude to call it weird when an actual person could conceivably be called this name.
Plus, while the developers may have put this name in as a joke, it does not mean it's okay for you to ridicule it as a fake name.
Yes, people have different, unique, and wonderful facial features. I find it so sad that wide noses and faces are turned down and replaced with 'YouTuber' faces that all look the same. Hooked noses are beautiful in their own way. Big chins are beautiful in their own way.
Just because something does not match your concept of what 'beauty' is, does not mean it isn't beautiful.
For games released in the early 2000s, the early Sims series has been remarkably good at representing people of different lives. Think Amaury Plumard from The Urbz--how many games back then had wheelchairs? And though it aged poorly, how many games back in 2000 had same-sex relations enabled? I think it's important to keep up that trend of diversity and openness.
If there are any more misconceptions I have missed, feel free to comment them down below, but please keep in mind that representation does matter and we are trying to get rid of stereotypes in this community. People need to have the opportunity to leave input about how they are being represented. You can have your discussions, just please don't point fingers and call people things before you understand what they're saying :))
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on your recent statements I have two semi questions-
1. are there any groups not known to be harmful? how are people collaborating to better understand this stuff?
2. if one does unknowingly end up in one of these harmful groups, what should they do?
The two types of groups I've found to not be harmful are a) groups that don't impose one way of shifting, meaning that different views and beliefs are allowed, and b) groups that are very reality focused and place little focus on the supernatural. Neither should be packs or "family-focused", they should be more like online forums for shifters to talk in, and physically shifting (or escaping one's humanity) should not be the goal of the group in question. The mod team should be able to deal with the standard issues that might arise moderating a forum such as people looking to cause confusion, kicking out trolls and creeps, discouraging dangerous ideas, etc. Skeptics should be allowed to enter and talk, provided they're following the rules and not harassing members. (Note: by non-harmful I mean not encouraging unhealthy practices, forcing rituals or "making people shifters" or generally being cultish.)
It also shouldn't need to be said, but the groups should also be free of racism, sexism, ableism, queerphobia, suicide-baiting, etc. It should also be free of dodgy behavior - nobody should be asking for say, nude pictures of you or wanting you to do inappropriate things to others. These aren't shifter-specific issues, but if a group has these problems it's just unhealthy irregardless of shifting being there.
A good example of A would be a site like Kin-Walkers, or WerewolfsWebsite. Both sites were open to a variety of views and members (preventing an echo chamber), and although shifting was a focus of both sites, the physical world was just as important. You had members talking about finding time for the supernatural in-between school and work, or how to navigate adult life as a were, and becoming balanced with one's animal side. Kin-Walkers was just as focused on spirituality and shamanism, so for some that was something that preoccupied them more than shifting physically.
This group style might be undesirable for people who are less interested in the wider supernatural though, or who want a purely rational, scientific explanation for shifting. They also might let in individuals who are a little bit "out there" from time to time, so if you have a low tolerance for what might be termed "fluffy" behavior, that might not be a group for you.
A good example of B would be Werewolf-Shifters amino, or the old I am a Real Werewolf group of Experience Project. Although shifters were there, shifting was considered an undesirable trait, and most dissuaded people from even romanticizing it. Most shifters saw themselves as human, shifting was a rare event (if it ever happened at all) and most lived as humans and emphasized human lives. When shifting was talked about, it was talked about in almost purely scientific terms - you can't be turned or changed, it's likely genetic, it coincides with the end of puberty, you can't decide when to shift, etc. Because of this, many of the conversations in these groups trend towards ordinary life matters instead of strictly focusing on the supernatural.
This group style might be good for those who like a more scientific approach to shifting, though a lot in these groups tend to be older and prone to being a bit skeptical of newer concepts as a result. (Ex. many are skeptical of therians/otherkin, plurals, pop-culture pagans, etc.) If you're not fond of being grilled or queried on these things, that might not be a group for you.
Generally, if you can find a shifting forum or group that isn't a pack, you're onto a great start.
If you do unknowingly end up in an unhealthy, harmful, or toxic group... first, you should try to leave as soon as possible. If it's a discord server or forum, find the best way to leave and do it all at once. Delete all your posts if you can, and get screenshots of any offending behavior if necessary. If you know the times the mods tend to come on, find the time when they're not on, and do what you can to erase your identity. Block all the members if you have to, if you're afraid they might try to contact you or harass you.
If people are pressuring you to do dangerous substances or rituals, or recommending them, bring it up on the forum or tell the mods. In a healthy group this is usually swiftly dealt with, in harmful groups they aren't.
If they have information on you that might be compromising (such as addresses, photos, or other ID) and they intend to use it against you, get their info, block them and report them to the authorities - what they're doing may be illegal at that point. It might also be good to inform anybody that you know and trust, since they might be able to help you through it. If the group plans to contact others with the photos to humiliate you, get to those people first and tell them what's going on - that way if that group tries contacting them, it has no effect.
If you know the group in person, my advice is much the same, but with a stronger focus on contacting the police, since they're more likely to be useful here.
Remember, being a shifter doesn't excuse any harmful or bad behavior. Even if someone proves their claims 100% and seems sincere, that doesn't give them the right to manipulate you or abuse you.
I'd also encourage you to check yourself and see if you're doing fine in a particular group. Even if it isn't objectively harmful, some groups just don't work well for certain people, and that's fine. If it's an otherwise healthy group, it should allow you to leave without much fuss.
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hello tumblrines and tumblrinos and tumblrinas, for those of you who have played DBH and are new to writing with me here is a quick rundown of things you absolutely need to know abt my portrayal:
my connor is set primarily post-deviating and post-peaceful revolution. i do not write post-violent revolution things and i don't have an interest in that storyline. you will not convince me otherwise and i consider it rude to try
connor is almost always deviant. he has a pre-deviant verse i rarely write in. he is always headed toward deviancy.
CONNOR DOES NOT GRAPPLE WITH GUILT FOR WHAT CYBERLIFE DID WITH HIS BODY. he regrets that his hands were used to hurt people. he does not blame himself for it. he has not ever once publicly apologised for being abused and he will not ever once publicly apologise for being abused. if he hunted your muse personally he might express regret to them privately. he will not apologise even then, but he could express regret.
CONNOR IS NOT 'CONFUSED' ABOUT EMOTIONS AND HE IS NOT A PUPPY. he is deviant the same way markus progressed from "i'm not programmed to critique art" to "i'm gonna start a revolution" before and after deviancy, respectively. connor was looking for himself and found himself. he is entirely competent, entirely real, and entirely himself. he is not "partly" real. he is not "partly" getting used to feeling. he is not "partly" on his way. he is already here.
CONNOR WAS ABUSED BY AMANDA AND HAS LASTING TRAUMA AS A RESULT OF IT. she could (and did) touch every single thought that ever entered his head, assessed it, turned it over, examined, deleted, restrained, fought. she dragged him into himself and stole his autonomy and made use of his body without his permission. she is entirely an AI program, was not sentient herself (full stop, i have zero interest in this thought experiment), and connor is so intensely private about this experience only one person knows. he is ashamed of it. he should not be. he attends a mostly-human therapy group for survivors of sa once a week because he gets a lot of it in relation to this trauma.
connor is a sleepy person, he will sleep in most places. this was an extravagant headcanon just bc i appreciated the thought of tired!connor, i love him
connor works full time at the DPD as a detective and part time at New Jericho providing what is essentially inreach services. he works primarily in android and android-related violent crime. he does not care if you steal food, water, thirium, etc, in front of him. his loyalty is to the people he supports and cares about, not the organisation he works for. he will turn a blind eye to most things that aren't actively hurting people.
connor has two human verses! my preference is human (2) if you would like to write with him. he's Trying Very Hard.
if you want more information about any of these i have several posts outlining these points in expansive detail, just bonk me! thanks
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