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trashiiplant · 3 months

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rain world if it was good

#yes this is just a bunch of blatantly traced alastor renders #sue me #shitpost #I refuse to use my art tag on this #rw #rain world downpour #rain world #five pebbles #looks to the moon #big sis moon #no significant harassment #seven red suns #I saw people do this on twitter and decided to join the bandwagon #.this is very much satire

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pandoa · 1 year

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I WAS SOLD TO NIGHT RAVEN?!?!?

where your crow-like father sells you to the most eligible group of young men in twisted wonderland

~feat. vil schoenheit, rook hunt, epel felmier, deuce spade, ace trappola, kalim al-asim, and jamil viper~ vdc group!!

twisted wonderland x gender neutral reader warnings: mentions of alcohol, gambling, toxic parental relationships, ooc, crowley is a dad. literally nothing in this is canon

i hope u know where this is going

"Oh, and by the way, I'm selling you for one madol."

"What—?"

BANG! BANG! BANG!

CRASH!!!

In what seemed like an instant, the door to the place you regrettably called "home" was blasted off of its hinges with a resounding collision, stray particles of dust beginning to scratch the air with each spec and what had looked to you like... the silhouettes of seven young men—?

You should have known this would've happened eventually.

Time and time again, your raven-haired father would return home, the putrid stenches of a long night spent mindlessly drinking staining the wrinkles in his clothes, as a loud clamoring of your already shattering door screeched throughout the barren walls of your home. Life was terrible. Absolutely terrible. And your so-called father's gambling obsession along with the debts he'd built up were terrible, too.

Some kind of father you are, Crowley, you furiously thought. You couldn't stand it anymore. Your gender neutral girlbossness was just to good for this crow.

Although, that fury you constantly felt would never match the absolute rage within the irises of your eyes when you spotted your father standing beside the closed doors of your home minutes before the (literal) destruction, luggage that looked eerily similar to yours placed adjacent to him in a messily put-together pile.

"Oh, look! They're all here already~" the pompous man sang as he turned to face the clearing shadows of the people in front of the both of you. You couldn't believe what he had just said. Your mouth hung open in shock confusion as the blaring light from outside bled into the house as your father grinned at the sizable cracks and hole where your door should have been.

Wait.

Was that a cauldron wedged into the other side of your house?

"Welcome!" Crowley practically shouted with his a-little-too-cheery voice, escorting a group of young men into what was left of your home. "How are you gentlemen doing today? Perfect weather for selling your own child to a bunch of random strangers, hm? Yes, yes! I knew you would get it! Anyway, here's what you all ordered," the man said leaving no room for any voice to reply as he harshly shoved you into the arms of one of the men who had extremely long, flowing hair of dark chocolate brown that made your orbs dilate as you shyly blushed an embarrassing red at the contact.

"Oh, I-I-I-I'm s-s-s-sorry," you stuttered.

The man dryly looked your way, unfazed, "You're fine. Just don't do it again. I get enough to deal with from Kalim and I'm in no need for more."

Bro was so in love with you.

"Now, Jamil we may be purchasing this peculiar individual, but let's not all be too curt, hm~?" another man with short blonde hair cut into the space separating you from the group of men. He seemed very eccentric as he proceeded to adjust the fluffy feather of his hat above his head.

"Tell that to Deuce," a boy with a cute red heart covering his left eye said glaring at his friend beside him, "He's the one that literally blew up the damn house just now."

The boy who you assumed to be Deuce glared back at his friend (?) "I did not blow it up. You're the one that told me to use the cauldron."

"And you're the one who actually used it. Dumbass."

"OH YOU—"

"Now, boys, no fighting here." Just as you thought no more men could interject this strange conversation, another man—who was rather glamorous, at that—pushed past the fighting friends as he stopped whatever chaos would erupt if he did not. "It's uncouth and will ruin the eyeliner I oh-so-kindly put on you all. Don't waste my hardly spent time."

"It wuhz mor' of auh' waste of our time, though, but we'll let yuh gaslight yuhself, Vil..." you caught the sighs of a smaller lavender-haired boy whisper under his breath.

Vil slowly turned to the smaller boy, a dark aura cursing the faker-than-Barbie smile on the beautiful man's face, "What was that Epel? I believe you had something to say. Please do enlighten us and see the consequences they may lead to."

Homie had the eyes of a murderer.

"N-nothing..." Epel regrettably replied. There was no way he could make it out of this alive. Maybe he should just sell himself to a random group of strangers like you did. Farmboy made you his idol.

"On another note," Vil said as he returned back to his stern manner, "the box for you is ready as well as the movers we hired of you."

You curiously looked at the man, "Movers? How much of my personal belongings are we taking?"

"Personal belongings? Oh, dear burnt potato, the box is for you. The movers will pick you up and drive behind us back to our home. Oh, but not to worry, they'll wrap you up in plenty of bubble wrap, so hopefully no damage will come to you."

"You're packing me in a cardboard box—??????"

"We're packing you in a cardboard box," all seven of the men dryly answered.

Damn. Capitalism popped off again ig.

a/n: ahem-

MWAHAHAHA APRIL FOOLS MY SKRUNKLES-

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x-heesy · 28 days

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😂

#crying 😂😂😂😂#our whole system is very very wrong 😑#bots #verified my ass #4/2024 #satire #dirty memes #dirty humor #fuckit #question everything #x-heesy #meme #memes #cartoons #robot #fuck you very much

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steakout-05 · 3 months

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*clenched fists, head on the table, white knuckled, seething, hyperventilating, visible veins showing, sweating, about to burst into tears, shaking violently, going to explode*

it's.... spelled........ JON.............. arbuckle........

#how i actually feel when i see someone spell jon arbuckle's name as ''john'' for the 574867347th time /j #jon arbuckle #garfield #shitpost #i find it interesting how many people spell his name with a H though #like i get that john is the more common spelling but also it was never written or spelled that way in any garf media #it's more common with people who haven't read garfield which is understandable actually #this post is a joke i don't actually get mad when people spell his name with a H #it's just like... you know that feeling you get when you really REALLY want to correct someone on a piece of info you know they got wrong?#yeah it's that #i'm very passionate about garfield if you couldn't tell lol #i guess there's just so much misinfo about garfield that it gets kinda exhausting #like i've heard a couple people say that garfield was made during WW2???#and when i first heard that i was like ''????? literally no it wasn't???''#like i mean this in the most polite way but What The Actual Fuck Are You Talking About #omg that's like that andrew garfield tweet i hate so much. you know the one that says that garfield was created by his granddad-#-about his cat who was named 'lasagna'? i hate that tweet with every fiber of my being there's SO MUCH wrong about it it's not even funny #i think that tweet is actually satire though but honestly it's so hard to tell what's satire and what isn't anymore #anyway. jon is spelled jon not john have a good day :)

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grendelsmilf · 1 year

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guy learning about theatrical discourse for the very first time and also choosing the worst possible example to cite because this specific batch of idiotic characters do all sound dumb as hell when they talk

#he says that the show goes for realism but that’s also not true it just employs certain stylistic elements that are shorthand for simulating #‘realism’ eg the camera work but imo the intended effect is comedic not realistic #even if the show has been veering into drama more and more #it’s still very much a show that employs playwrights #and the endeavor to simulate reality (especially in a deliberate satire) is futile anyway #no one watches this show for the realism lmfao #o.tv

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oldshrewsburyian · 1 year

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Robin Hood is king of the forest both by dignity of birth and by virtue of his standing army: to say nothing of the free choice of his people, which he has indeed, but I pass it by as an illegitimate basis of power.

Thomas Love Peacock, Maid Marian (1822)

#supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses #there's an even more explicitly socialist bit earlier about distributive justice #all of this makes much more sense when one realizes the author was pals with the shelleys #anyway #a very strange little novel #walter scott parody #greenwood shenanigans #social satire #combined and stirred #maid marian 1822 #thomas love peacock #book quotes

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marisatomay · 1 year

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rewatching ferris bueller’s day off (1986) on cable and it’s incredible how many elements of this movie are just blatantly ripped off from risky business (1983)

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chronomally · 8 months

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I'm rewatching The Birdcage and there's something about the like incisive satire of queer comedies from the '90s that are so thoroughly unconcerned with the feelings of cishet audiences

#please feel free to ignore this #I'm watching The Birdcage #It reminds me of a couple of articles and critiques I've seen of media ostensibly geared towards queer ppl and/or POC #starting in like the '10s #where it feels very much like it's constantly trying to make white and/or cishet audiences feel included in the joke or the action #or stops short of satire that may hurt their feelings #The Birdcage goes all in on satirizing the hypocrisy of conservatives and the Republican party #But I'm a Cheerleader mocks gender roles and conversion camps #I remember reading a few articles comparing The Proud Family to the remake #and talking about how the new series feels like it constantly brings the action to a screeching halt #to turn to the camera and explain everything for the hypothetical white audience #vs. the original that was speaking specifically to Black/brown audiences and if you were a white viewer you could keep up or not #It's very easy to blame this on streaming but it's hard to pinpoint why #I guess sort of just the rising obsession with viewership/metrics #If people stop watching because they don't 'get it' then that's Bad because what if they unsubscribe or whatever #Changing the channel is no longer an option

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starlightseq · 16 days

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I like your trans!Charlie comic, but I found it disgusting for whitewashing that Lilith gave birth to Charlie and ignoring that Lucifer was the one to do so.

WHITEWASHING ?????////??JFJKFJFDKJJJK

#i've been ignoring asks i've been getting on this but this is so funny #the sad thing is i can't tell if this is satire or genuine #if it is genuine please stop believing everything you see online because sadly he is not Officially trans in canon #he's my very much not cis nonbinary wife to me tho #and ALSO WHITEWASHING ???????????#HELP WDYM WHITEWASHING?????#ANSWERS

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house-of-daena · 7 months

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i never find it in myself to enjoy those dottore fics where they go "ooooo he's never gonna love you" or "ooo he's using you" or smth even more toxic. (no hate to writers who write him that way btw! power to u cuz it's probably a bit more lore accurate 💞)

cuz id be like "what are u talking about silly he's sooo in love with me literally the sweetest guy ever he's just. a guy."

#» asmo talks about wife #this is SATIRE #but my wife is very much in loce with me 😊#rn hes looking at me with hearts in his eyes #soooo delusional

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x-heesy · 27 days

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FДИCУ DISCЯΞPДИCУ

G҉ l҉ i҉ t҉ c҉ h҉ m҉ y҉ L҉ i҉ f҉ e҉

𝑲𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝑺𝒄𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒃𝒚 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑷𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒕𝒔 🇦🇺

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enbysiriusblack · 8 months

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thinking about horror film au marauders.. (tw. lotta gore)

lily the nerdy, bossy character that comes out with a giant axe and brutally beats up the killer/s to the shock of every other character

peter is either the bargaining character that tries to bargain and give the killer/s what they want just as he's about to die. or the character secretly on the killer's side that's revealed at the end

definitely giving wolfstar the making out whilst a killer is in their house/car/woods

mary, dorcas, remus, and lily all turning to each other wondering which of them is gonna die first, when they realise they're basically in a horror film cause of the black character dying first trope (i watched the blackening yesterday and the tagline "we can't all die first" gave me this hc. very good film. highly recommend)

sirius is the resident horror film expert that tells them what the killer usually does next (im imagining someone dying and everyone is just screaming over the dying body and sirius is also screaming but then adds in "this is exactly like that scene in wrong turn!"

the screamers are probably mary, remus, and james. not a definite though. i can see it being other people.

marlene gets the most jump scare scenes and emmeline gets the most hearing creaking and footsteps

james is the best at fighting but absolutely hates blood. feel like there needs to be a scene where he's like punching a masked killer and is doing SO WELL. and he gets the killer on the ground and is about to pull the mask off when the killer pulls out a knife and stabs at his hands and chest and shit. and he just screams and backs away staring at his blood until he faints.

as marlene dies, she clutches dorcas' hand and whispers "the lesbians never get a happy ending. apart from fear street... why couldn’t this be like fear street?"

the final girl HAS to be mary. ofc.

#im very much a satire horror fan. in case you couldn’t tell from this.#gonna explain how everyone dies (other than mary) in the tags cause im having ideas now i thought i was finished #idk the order so this is random and not at all chronological #remus- is high as fuck. thinks sirius or james is pranking him and then gets stabbed or whatever #sirius- tries to out horror the killer. tips a bucket of fake blood on them. has a chainsaw and mask #has a bunch of recording devices with sounds he previously made. etc. but then his fucking phone goes off #and he gets so annoyed because thats such a rookie mistake. and he asks to cut and do a retake just before the killer kills him #marlene- kinda already said about her death. but feel like it's def outside like in the street and shes only with dorcas #i already said james' death #lily- feel like there's more than one killer and she manages to kill one. just to turn around and another to get her #dorcas- she gets VERY into it once marlene dies. definitely gets hits in if not killing some of the killers.#but they ultimately get stabbed a lot and they run to marlene's body whilst bleeding out instead of the hospital #and she dies in marlene's dead grasp.#emmeline doesn't get killed for a while. is bait in a plan to catch killer/s but the plan goes wrong and she gets pushed out a high window #i havent mentioned other characters but why not say their deaths.#regulus- he's made to be involved with like a scene in a library where they go to him to ask about some secret history of the town #and then is killed the next day but has s bunch of writings and pages of books around his room about the killers and hes solved it #but the killer burns it all before anyone gets there #pandora- kinda want her to the first death for some reason idk.. like it gets framed as a suicide but so many people dont believe it #and the killings go on #barty- sees the masked killer and like jokes around touching their mask and stuff. and then the killer just like. brings out an axe #and chops his head off #evan- dont know why but im imagining him driving and getting those spikes in the road to lure him out the car #also btw didn't mention peter's death cause im leaning towards him being secretly one of the killers #and gets killed by either lily or dorcas #was gonna say barty and evan could be killers then i realised i made them kill reg and pandora and cas so people would not like that #also no mary death obviously since shes the final girl. survivor ever <3 immortal <3 #marauders era #marauders #tw. gore

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buildarocketboys · 1 year

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Reading Bleak House by Charles Dickens for my book club (we're not talking about it until October but it is a chonker so I'm reading a chapter here and there while I read other books as well). While it can be a little difficult to parse at times, at others, the humour and the satire and the incisive character portraits really come through. I've not read much Dickens, only A Christmas Carol which I love, but that's pretty short where most of Dickens' work is intimidatingly long. But I'm definitely enjoying it so far, this quote in particular in Chapter 7 struck me as very Pratchett-esque in its humour:

'It appears to the afflicted Mr Guppy and his inconsolable friend that there is no end to the Dedlocks, whose family greatness seems to consist in their never having done anything to distinguish themselves, for seven hundred years.'

#charles dickens #dickens #bleak house #terry pratchett #pterry #satire #(obviously I realise it's the other way round and Pratchett must definitely have been influenced by Dickens)#but yeah even tho I've read Christmas Carol and was kind of aware that Dickens satirises like Victorian London #I don't think I quite grasped how hard he goes on the satire and biting social commentary #or at least I assumed that maybe I wouldn't get it?#and I'm sure some things I don't get but a lot I do and I'm enjoying it very much

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thevegetablewhichnoonedaresname · 14 days

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I bet pretentious weebs would throw up if they found out that, in the Japanese silent film performance I went to tonight, the subtitles called a child "Tetsu" instead of "Tecchan" like the performer doing the script and voices clearly said, because you lose so much nuance about the characters if you don't leave the honorifics on and ACTUALLY it's technically an incorrect translation because the words are different and a correct translation would actually just be Japanese subtitles and if people can't just deal with that then they're lazy

#pickle pontificates #if this sounds like I'm vagueposting about some very specific discourse that annoys me it's because that's exactly what it is #this post is satire #anyway. genuinely and non satirically I had a great time. it was a cool experience and the performers and musicians were SUPER talented #I'm so glad I went! the professors we went with snagged the performers afterward and we got to take a picture with them #holy crap. fund the arts. preserve things both physically and digitally or we lose our sense of connection with the past #and these films were only like a hundred years old. imagine how much more history we'll never see moving in front of us #but was nevertheless incredibly similar to our present #it's so magical to hear a Chicago audience in 2024 laugh at a joke that a Japanese audience in 1924 laughed at a hundred years ago

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electricleclerc · 1 year

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the real reason for chacha’s breakup: charlotte didn’t want to dye her hair red.

#charles leclerc #charles leclerc and charlotte #THIS IS SATIRE #THIS IS A JOKE #IM BEING FUNNY #formula1 #formula 1 #formula one #charlotte sine #i’m kidding #i think i’m so fucking hilarious #very much a joke #don’t send me hate

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ennaih · 4 months

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Not Every Film I Watch In 2024 4. The Distinguished Gentleman (1992)

#the distinguished gentleman #the distinguished gentleman (1992)#2024filmgifs #my gifs #i don't know what's wrong with people #who slag this movie off #it is delightful #and it's not even satire #it's a straight up real life drama #and yes of course it's very Capra-esque #not that Capra had an ounce of integrity the fink #but i love this whole cast #and Lane Smith as the baddie omg #and Ms Sheryl looking fabulous #even though she had not much to do #and Eddie looking the hottest i've ever seen him #and i've watched a LOT of his films #i have so much respect and admiration for him #coulda done without his casual homophobia tho

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