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if you're worried about repetitive sentence starters in narrative writing (ie: frequently starting with "I" or a pov character's name), i think the most important thing to focus on is not the kind of words you're using, but rather the moving parts in your story that are being highlighted.
english is best suited for a subject (I) - verb (wrote) - object (this) sentence structure; that's the format that the reader will inhale without noticing, easy as breathing. it's also the easiest for you to write (hence, your draft full of sentences starting with pronouns). for a lot of the delivery of your story, you should be in that "stealth mode" so that the lines you want noticed can really leap off the page in comparison. messing with the subject-verb-object pattern signals to the reader that there's something to notice, and writing is awkward when it's full of sentences that say, "look at me!"
if you're worried about variation of sentence starters, you want to zoom out on the narrative and think about the scene you are trying to show, or the point you are trying to make. let's do an example from my own writing:
That’s not all true. Baz had already mapped out the best regular flights from Heathrow to LAX. He was talking about weekend trips in the middle and FaceTime date ideas he’d found on Pinterest. It filled Simon with dread. Baz wasn’t taking any of it seriously. As silly as the role was, everyone knew Bad Blood was going to be huge. Baz was the exciting, fresh face joining a star-studded cast for the most audience-friendly teen vampire show in history. Simon wasn’t going to let him blow it.
all the blue sentences follow, in general, that subject-verb-object pattern. the pink sentence is the outlier, and it's also the most significant line in the paragraph; in this story, this is the moment where you finally learn simon's motivation for previously breaking up with baz. the rest of the sentences all start with a noun, but they're different nouns based on what needs to be said.
here's another way this could be written:
Simon knows that's not all true. He'd watched Baz map out the best regular flights from Heathrow to LA and look up FaceTime date ideas. Simon worried that Baz wasn't taking it seriously. He knew Bad Blood would be huge, despite the concept being silly. But Simon knew Baz was the exciting, fresh face joining a star-studded cast for the most audience-friendly, sexy teen vampire show in history. Simon wasn't going to let him blow it.
this probably looks more similar to the kind of paragraph people get nervous about. simon simon simon -- like, stfu man! what's really happening is just that simon is not the best subject for all of these sentences. it's true that "simon knows" and "simon watched" and "simon knew," but we already know all that, because we know we're in his head. when you look at paragraphs like these, you want to identify the true subject of your sentences. even in the most introspective of paragraphs (like the above example), the narrator is usually not the Most Important Noun.
let's do one more example for when you're writing really menial tasks -- this is where i most commonly have this problem:
Andrew turns on the TV, puts the volume almost all the way down, and crouches in front of the DVD collection. His fingers trail along the spines for a moment before he pulls a case from the shelf. The player swallows the disc as Andrew crosses the room to turn out the lights. Tinged blue in the shadows, he comes to stand in front of Neil again, hand extended in demand.
so, same thing: the subjects, the nouns taking action, are andrew, his fingers, the dvd player, and then andrew again with a modifier. the first time i wrote this, i'm sure "andrew" or "he" was the start of every sentence, because my man is just doing his lil task here and sometimes that's not the most exciting thing to write. but again: it's not all about him! other nouns deserve the spotlight. the last sentence breaks the pattern, but it's also the completion of the task: he has successfully set the movie-watching scene, and this sentence is transitioning us to them watching the movie.
there's lots of ways to write and i definitely don't have all the answers, but i do think that any writing advice that asks you to focus on mechanics rather than structure will ultimately not help you solve the root of bad writing habits. when i write, i'm thinking: what's the main player noun in the action taking place? that's what becomes the subject of my sentence, so my starters are naturally a lot more varied. it's less intimidating to think about the purpose of your story (which you're already excited about!) when you're writing than it is to put that focus on mechanics.
good luck! you've got this!!
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How many times can I use “he/she whispered” before it gets repetitive? I’m writing a scene where someone dies and the character is heartbroken and speaking quietly. Any tips to convey their pain without constantly saying that they whispered? And also- is there a difference between murmur, mumble, and mutter?
Conveying "Whispering" without Repetition
You really wouldn't want to use "he/she whispered" more than a couple times in one scene, but there are lots of ways to convey that your characters are whispering.
Setting Up Context
When you write a dialogue scene where the characters are whispering, it's important to establish why they're whispering. If you set up context for why whispering is necessary, you can trust the reader to understand that all of the dialogue is being whispered without having to come right out and say it. You can give the occasional reminder, but every line doesn't have to be tagged as a whisper.
Using Synonyms
You don't want to use any iteration of "whisper" as a tag more than a couple times in one dialogue scene, but you also don't want to go overboard on using synonyms for "whisper" either.
Murmur, Mumble, Mutter--and Why You Need a Dictionary
The thesaurus is undoubtedly a handy tool for writers, but online thesauruses are particularly treacherous when it comes to accuracy. For example, murmur, mumble, and mutter are all listed as synonyms of "whisper," but as you seemed to suspect, they are all subtly different, and that goes for whisper, too. That's why it's really helpful to look synonyms up in the dictionary before employing them.
Let's say you have a third use of "whisper" in the following sentence:
"I'm sorry for your loss, truly, but we need to get out of here," Craig whispered.
Now, let's look at actual definitions of whisper and the thesaurus suggested synonyms of murmur, mumble, and mutter:
Whisper: to speak softly with little or no vibration of the vocal cords especially to avoid being overheard. (Keyword: soft)
Murmur: a low indistinct but often continuous sound; a half-suppressed complaint/grumble. (Keywords: continuous, grumble)
Mumble: to utter with a low inarticulate voice; to utter words in a low confused indistinct manner. (Keywords: inarticulate, confused)
Mutter: to utter sounds or words indistinctly or with a low voice and the lips partly closed. (Keywords: indistinctly, lips partly closed)
So, as you can see, murmur, mumble, and mutter are not direct synonyms of "whisper." However, if one of those whispered lines of dialogue needs to be grumbling, inarticulate, confused, or indistinct with the lips partly closed, then certainly use the appropriate word.
Other Alternatives
- low/soft/quiet voice
- hushed tone
- under one's breath
- behind one's hand
- into someone's ear
Exposition
Good writing requires a delicate balance of exposition, action, and dialogue, and that's true even when you zoom in on a dialogue scene. You never want a back and forth of tagged lines, like:
"This is sad," Jill whispered.
"It really is," agreed Dan quietly.
Under her breath, Simone added, "I'm ready to get out of here."
"We should stay a few more minutes," Dan said in a hushed tone.
It's like a verbal ping-pong match. It's monotonous.
But look what happens if we add some context via exposition, as well as adding a little action:
The room was filled with mourners, mostly dressed in black or other muted colors. Except for murmurs of conversation and the occasional sniffle or nose-blow, it was almost silent.
"This is sad," Jill whispered.
Dan swallowed past the knot of grief in his throat. "It really is."
Simone shifted uncomfortably, her ears ringing in the heavy quiet. "I'm ready to get out of here."
Even though they were whispering, the tension in their words had attracted the attention of the minister and a few of the mourners.
Dan drew his friends away from the crowd. "We should stay a few more minutes, then we can go," he said, still speaking in a hushed tone.
See how much better that is?
The first paragraph sets up the context. The room is quiet. People are in mourning. We can expect that no one is going to walk into this scene speaking at full volume--and if someone does, that would be a good time for a tag like, "he shouted" or "said a little too loud." Otherwise, we can pretty much trust people are whispering.
But the tone of the dialogue scene is still set with that first and only whisper tag. After that, there's just a little reminder of the context (grief, heavy quiet) and a reminder that they are in fact whispering. The action (Dan swallowing past the knot of grief in his throat, Simone shifting uncomfortably, the attention of the minister and mourners drawn toward them, Dan drawing his friends away from the crowd) reiterates the tone and keeps the dialogue scene more interesting.
I hope that helps! :)
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We doin a dialogue prompt thingy!
I’m going to list a bunch of dialogue prompts below, and you guys can send in requests of which prompt to write a mini oneshot on with a character. I got all these prompts off of google, so don’t come for me saying I’m stealing them or something.
It can be Danganronpa or YTTD, but I’m expecting mostly Danganronpa. You can request any character that I haven’t specifically said I won’t write!
If you want it to be a specific scene or you want a specific character to say the line, that’s totally ok! Just let me know in the request! :)
This is also the rare occasion where I shall allow angst
Here’s the prompts under the cut;
1. “I am fully convinced you never actually graduated kindergarten”
2. “I promised…. That I would protect you. And I intend to keep that promise.”
3. “I’ll do anything.” “Even kiss me?” “Ok, not that.”
Or alternatively
4. “I’ll do anything.” “Even kiss me?” “Absolutely.”
5. “Does it ever stop hurting?” “No, you just make room for it.”
6. “Stay. I need you more than you think.”
7. “Don’t say a word. Just dance with me.”
8. “I like you a lot. Just thought you should know.”
9. “What if someone finds out about us?”
10. “Take this chance, I’m begging you. Don’t spend the rest of your life wondering what could have been.”
11. “Well everyone here can kill you, I just can do it the most efficiently.”
12. “You love him/her/them, don’t you?” “was it that obvious?”
13. “Until the day you learn to start a normal conversation, I’ll have to be here to clean up your messes.”
14. “Because no one cares about me!” “I do!”
15. “Just hold my hand and focus on my touch.”
16. “You’re freezing, come here.”
17. “You know, we make a pretty good team.”
18. “Let’s elope.”
19. “I…. I miss them. I know I shouldn’t, but it do.”
20. “I’ll do anything to make you happy.”
21. “You didn’t hear my side. You don’t know the truth.”
22. “Look at all these people who are alive because of you.”
23. “You’re the best thing I never knew I needed.”
24. “It’s over. They can’t hurt you anymore.”
25. “Do you…. Remember me?”
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the inherent romance of literally everything when you’re a sentimental bitch
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hero x villain masterlist
all prompts and snippets on my page.
any works not listed under the prompts section, are obviously not prompts. please do not use them.
if you'd like to use a prompt, please credit me.
sub categories to make filtering easier<3
last updated: 3/08/21
whump/dark
empty promises — villain made a promise they never intended to keep, and it tears hero apart.
just drive — a taxi driver hoping to retire, is confronted by an individual who threatens them into doing as they say.
corruption — under complete control of villain, a hero forced under the radar is forced to commit a deadly sin. +tw
hostage — retrieving money, sidekick is swept up in villain's most recent bank heist, and better yet, they're in their civilian persona.
punishment — villain crosses a line, and supervillain makes sure to punish them for it.
dream world — a hero with little sanity takes their heroic morals to a twisted level, and only villain seems to notice.
drugged — hero is wheeled frantically into a hospital. but they don't seem to be injured, nor do any of the staff seem to be real doctors at all. +tw
win, lose — after a battle to decide the fates, villain seems to have lost the battle, but won the war.
break-in — during a top secret mission to gather incriminating evidence against villain's next scheme, hero is thrown into the claws of their enemy, by their own sidekick.
angst
gone — after a catastrophic explosion that destroyed part of an entire town, villain discovers a critically injured hero, who reveals a dangerous predicament.
dying confessions — while slowly losing their battle, hero decides to take these final moments to say words they should have said a long time ago.
failure — disoriented, wrecked, and terrified, villain finds hero in bad shape, determined to find out what seemed to have happened.
fair — the battle between heroes and villains is tiresome and bloody. hero has had enough, and villain only seems to make matters worse.
lost chance — villain, dying by the tip of hero's blade, wishes to tell hero what they've always wanted to say. they don't have enough time.
stay down — orders from above are to deliver hero in a body bag. a reluctant villains tries to convince them to stop fighting back, but hero is too resilient. +tw
unrequited — villain doesn't have much to live for. falling in love with hero was never on the agenda, but they don't mind dying for it. +tw
promises — hero is pushed to their lowest when supervillain finally seems to catch them. fearing for their life, villain makes a promise to save heeo from their miserable fate, no matter the cost. +tw
fluff and romance
thoughts — a concept in which a villain holds a soft spot for a hero.
it's love — a slow villain unexpectedly pours their heart out to hero in frustration at these unfamiliar feeling, without realizing they're confessing their love.
feelings — while on an important, deep undercover mission to destroy hero from the inside, villain didn't expect a strange turn of events.
scars — from their countless and difficult battles, hero is littered with scars they are ashamed of. villain is there to remind them that they are beautiful, inside and out.
comedy
forgetful — hero isn't the brightest when it comes to using their powers. it's a wonder how they haven't been killed already.
love, hate — hero doesn't particularly like villain. they don't seem to believe it, however.
shakira shakira (mlm) — confronting villain in their own home, hero is confronted with an embarrassing revelation that villain might tease them about forever.
royalty
waltz (wlw) — a spy is ordered to assassinate the queen during the ball.
whump/dark
identity — all hero wanted to do was head home. villain, approaching them in broad daylight, had other plans.
boundaries — a mind infiltrating villain yearns to find hero's weakness. they end up digging up a dark secret.
weak — protector of lives. even with the villain vulnerable beneath them, they still can't seem to pull the trigger.
inferior — hero bit off more than they could chew in a death-defying encounter against supervillain themselves.
rude awakening — recovering in the hospital after a drastic fight, hero's peaceful recovery was rudely interrupted.
cold chill — a cocky hero infiltrates their enemies lair in hopes to gain the upper hand. villain, who is equipped with ice powers, leaves them helplessly defenceless in mere seconds.
action and adrenaline
hero moral — a former hero, now a well-known villain, is tasked with a getting out of a sticky situation, while dealing with a new, determined hero.
fluff and romance
bandages (not my prompt)— villain takes care of hero's wounds after a serious fight, all while dealing with the growing tension between them.
rest — a tired, but determined hero is struggling to fight their growing exhaustion. villain, with powers to manipulate the mind, offers to help.
inevitable — a hero has the ability to see different options for the future, and their probability. unfortunately, a new villain seems to form a highly inevitable romance branch with every encounter.
rescue — villain's lover gets kidnapped, and in a rage, villain takes off to retrieve them back.
royalty
king's dog — hero, who is determined to defy the king no matter the cost, is recaptured and forced to confront him again.
whump/dark
roulette — taken captive by supervillain, hero and sidekick are forced to play a deadly game of russian roulette, in which only one of them will make it out of alive. +tw
part one
part two
control — a mind controlling villain rescues a stubborn hero after they almost destroy themselves saving civilians. when truths unveil, hero abruptly realises that villain is a cold-blooded manipulator, who likes their prey dependent. +tw
part one
part two
part three
retribution — the commanding officer of the police force is faced with public hate and scorn when the heroes overshadow them. villain, who takes a rather special interest in the officer, proposes an offer that they're somehow sure officer will take. +tw
part one
part two
fluff and romance
smoke and mirrors — after being taken captive one night, a hero is exposed against their will to villain's incessant smoking. what started off as distaste to the tobacco, slowly became a destructive addiction. but can something good arise from their rocky relationship? (whump/dark elements)
part one
part two
part three
part four
angst
abandoned — villain kidnaps hero's sidekick in a ploy to lure them into a sophisticated trap. their plan goes awry when their guest of honour decides not to even show up.
part one
part two
royalty
spy (mlm; not my prompt) — a deadly war has broken out. oscar is taken captive by the enemy after spying for crucial information, and confronts the general, a ruthless killer, who has plans in store for oscar which will make him wish he was dead. +tw
part one
part two
#masterlist#hero x villain#heroes and villains#hero and villain#hero x villain prompts#hero and villain prompts#hero x villain snippets#prompts#writing prompt#i reblog
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Frev prompts, Part 3! Enjoy!
13. A young female protagonist is desperate for a job to support her family and is hired by an older woman named Charlotte, who lives a rather reclusive and secretive life.
Slowly, Charlotte and the young girl bond over their mutual feelings of loneliness and loss of close family. The two become unlikely yet close friends.
Such close friends that when Charlotte gets arrested and the memoirs she is writing get stolen, the young girl decides to launch an investigation to find the memoirs and clear her friend’s name, only to find out that her friend isn’t quite as ordinary and simple as she seems to be.
14. A noblewoman fakes her death and flees to Paris while disguised as a man in order to escape a corrupt and abusive fiancé who is only interested in her money and is much older than her.
In Paris, while living under a fake identity, the heroine quickly becomes acutely aware of multiple issues plaguing the country and joins a certain political club in order to attempt to make France a better place.
But as things in the city begin escalating and the situation becomes more complicated, it gets harder and harder for the noblewoman to keep her true identity a secret.
How long will she be able to keep the charade up?
15. The protagonist makes a mistake and instead of saving their imprisoned brother they end up busting out one of the revolutionaries who are now deemed outlaws.
The protagonist still wants to help their brother while the revolutionary wants to save his friends, so the two team up and plan a good old prison break, ready to achieve their goals at any cost.
16. The protagonist, who has just lost their family during the massacres in Lyon, travels to Paris in hopes to report the atrocities to the Committee of Public Safety and bring the men responsible for the bloodbath to justice.
Unfortunately, the cruel men are not exactly eager to let a witness get away and send their goons to catch and silence the escaping youth before they can reach Paris.
Will the protagonist outwit their pursuers in this twisted “cat and mouse” chase?
17. An exchange student who is currently studying in France is desperate to make new friends. A group of rather reckless kids agree to become friends with the protagonist, but only on the condition that they spend a night in a supposedly haunted French Revolution-themed museum.
When the protagonist enters the museum, strange things begin to happen (ghosts, time travel, living statues or something else) and now they have to figure out the reason why that is the case. That and try to make it out in one piece, of course.
18. As unrealistic as that sounds, a simple wish made upon a star transports the protagonist into the era of the French Revolution where they decide to change history and make sure that the “evil” Robespierre never comes to the power that he supposedly ended up having.
But when the protagonist and Robespierre are coincidentally captured by the same people and have no choice but to cooperate if they wish to be free again, the protagonist begins to wonder if messing with history is really such a good idea.
Maybe, just maybe, history is indeed written by the victors and Robespierre is not all that bad.
19. A seemingly ordinary widow who is living in the countryside and raising her children by herself hides a revolutionary in her house so the Thermidorians don’t get to him.
Now the entire family must conceal the fact that he is alive and do everything they can to save his life and eventually get him to safety.
It won’t be easy but then again, when has doing the right thing been easy?
As the revolutionary spends time in hiding, assembling whoever he can still count on to rebel against the traitors, he finds himself forming an increasingly close bond with the family that has rescued him and little does said family know that the presence of the revolutionary in their house is about to change their lives in a way that nobody could have ever foreseen.
20. On the day of their graduation, the protagonist receives a present from their new stepmother, an owner of a fairly small local antique shop.
The present in question? A pair of old-fashioned glasses with green lenses to help with the protagonist’s vision problems. The protagonist likes the color green and antique things so they are overjoyed to get such a unique gift.
Unfortunately, upon receiving the glasses, the protagonist notices disturbing things happen to them - nightmares, memories that clearly aren’t theirs since they are about the French Revolution, mysteriously familiar voices in their head...None of it makes sense.
Unable to get rid of these symptoms via therapy nor medications, the protagonist resolves to crack this case and find out the exact reason why they have all the strange symptoms by taking a gap year trip to France and visiting the places to which the voices guide them.
Who knows, perhaps this investigation can even help the protagonist find out the true reason behind the strange phantom pain in their jaw and their seemingly irrational fear of blades.
Only one way to know for sure.
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“Do you hear that?”
“The Valkyries. They have come to preside over this battle.”
“What are they saying?”
“They chant hymns of glory. And of mourning.”
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congrats on the 5k! prompts about two characters who went to a ball/prom with different people but they both wanted to go with each other but were to proud/stubborn/idiot to ask each other????
thanks!
staring at each other from across the room while dancing with other people
confrontation at the end of the night, potentially ending with a kiss and an ''i love you''
ditching your date to go find your lover, and when you find them being ''somewhat'' intimate with their date, you feel yourself jealous enough to throw hands, but when your lover asks you why you came searching for them, you get tongue-tied
spending more time with each other than you do with your dates
smiling more frequently and bigger in each other's company than you do your dates
helping your lover tie their tie, and leaning in to kiss each other, quickly pulling away when you hear your date approaching
being so preoccupied with what your lover is doing with their date that you end up neglecting your own, and eventually, your date gets tired of not being paid attention to, scolds you, and storms off
you ask your lover to dance with you, and it's a bit awkward, but there's undeniable chemistry between the two of you, and your date, who's watching this go down, notices this as well. later on, they ask you if there's something going on between you and your ''lover''
ending the night by dancing with each other, having both being ditched by your dates
you drive your lover home, and follow them to their front door. you thank them for driving you home, and you share a good night kiss
''why didn't you ask me to go with you?''
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Tropea (Calabria, Italy)
Photos by @acriativelife on Instagram
Follow us on Instagram: @calabria_mediterranea
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Some Anime Characters Zodiac Signs based on their Birthdays.
Team Aries ♈️ - The Boss Leader, The Warrior (ENTJs)
(Or The Violent, Extremist B*tches but they are HOT) 💜
Team Taurus ♉️ - The Artist, The Kind Soul of the Zodiac
( Stubborn like a Rock)
Team Gemini ♊️ - The Storyteller, The Trickster
(The Gossipers & Crazy B*tches)
Team Cancer ♋️ - The Mom & the Healer
(The Sensitive Cute Babies)
Team Leo ♌️ - The Golden Child, The Actor
(Or The Drama-queens, attention seeking B*tches) Also Some Hotties here 💜
Team Virgo ♍️ - The Smart ass, the Perfectionist
(If the Anxiety would have a name, it would’ve been called Virgo)
Team Libra ♎️ - The Peacemaker, the Goody Goody (ENFPs)
(The everyone’s friend, but Always Indecisive & superficial a little) :p
Team Scorpio ♏️- The Mystic, The Mysterious
(The Jealous Weirdos) :p 💜
Team Sagittarius ♐️ - The Explorer, the Free Spirit
(They are the Funny Guys of the Zodiac, they live in their own world) 💜
Team Capricorn ♑️ - The Old Soul (INTJs)
(The Legends say they are Moneymaker, but I don’t know that for sure either) :p
Sorry about Aquarius & Pisces but Tumblr won’t let me post more than 10 pics :(
About Mbti Part is just my opinion based on Zodiac signs stereotypes.
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hi! i saw you made nsfw visual list for tokyo revengers, do you perhaps have a list for jjk boys? sorry i’m new here 😳
Jujutsu Kaisen NSFW Visual its porn
a/n: remember to wear headphones
Part 2
FUSHIGURO TOJI: link link link link link link link link link link link
GOJO SATORU: link link link link link link link
GETO SUGURU: link link link link link link link link
RYOMEN SUKUNA: link link link link link link link
NANAMI KENTO: link link link link
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Miscellaneous jjk text posts I forgot I made months ago 💀
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there’s this look in your eyes, it’s a sort of vacancy.
an open seat on an airplane. a ticket i booked hoping you could run away as fast as i.
there’s this feeling i have. a sort of misery.
god damn it’s exhausting always loving you more than you love me.
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