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lovechar · 3 months

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Silver Necklace.

pairing; Regulus Black x Potter!Reader

summary; after being paired with regulus black in potions class, you manage to slowly become friends. he steals your heart and it’s only a matter of time till he breaks it.

warnings; overall just angst, bits of fluff, mentions of sex (just asking about it, no smut), making out, enemies to lovers-esque

notes; fem!reader, mean-ish(??) regulus at start, no use of y/n, kinda long fic so not proof read, ps. i know sirius is 1959 but it works out better if he’s 1960 so don’t come at me, also, i read atyd for this .. (so this is kinda influenced by that)

Every passing day, you swore your heart ached more and more. Every glance you cast over to him in the halls, passing by as if strangers when not even a couple months ago you had been laughing and confiding in each other like idiots.

He had become so lifeless in such a short amount of time. You felt as if your grasp on your once joyful life had slipped through your fingers like coarse grains of sand.

Sooner than later, you had found yourself conflicted. Battling between wanting him by your side but having your beliefs clash. Then it was revealed and all was lost. You just wish you had the strength to go on as if he didn’t exist, like you used to.

It had all started during your fifth year at Hogwarts. You normally kept to yourself, only really talking to your friends and of course the boys: James, Sirius, Remus and Peter. In all honesty, you forgot Regulus existed most of the time.

That was till you two were paired for a potions class. He was very intelligent, you must admit. But also quite snarky.

“You will each be assigned a partner and then I would like you to work together to brew a specific potion,” your Potions Master, Professor Slughorn babbled on. “You will be given a maximum time period of three weeks to complete the potion then will be graded on it.”

You sort of tuned out after that. The professor kept talking, listing out names and assigning the pairs a specific potion. Your head snapped back in his direction when he called out your name. “And . . . Regulus Black.” Your eyes met his stoic grey ones. Merlin, he looked so similar to Sirius yet so unique, you thought, holding the same dark hair and high placed cheekbones. You must admit he was very good looking.

“You all will be making a Polyjuice Potion, which you can find in page 57 of your books. The lacewing flies, I have already stewed for each of you to save time. I advise you also check your potions some evenings to make sure they’re going well. ” Walking over to a table as Regulus Black followed, you pulled out your potion making book. The boy beside you watched as you flicked through the pages, looking for the Polyjuice potion, still not uttering a word to you.

Finally, you found it. “Aha!” You mumbled as the corners of your lips quirked up slightly. After sitting in silence, you had decided to spark up conversation.

“Here’s the ingredients list. Could you get the cauldron ready while I gather the other ingredients?” Your eyes once again looked up to meet his as he muttered out a gravelly response and did as you asked.

After twenty minutes, the bell had rung commencing the end of class. You turned to Regulus to say something to him but he had already left. With a sigh, you gathered your things and headed to your next class.

You were now sitting with Lily in the Great Hall, waiting on your brother and his friends. “I’m stuck paired with Sirius’ brother for Potions. He’s barely said a word to me at all, don’t you think that’s a bit strange?” You asked the red-haired girl, while casting a gaze over the Slytherin Table. Lily had replied but her words went through your ears as you studied the black and green robes. Your eyes flickered over to Regulus Black. He sat chatting to Evan Rosier.

“There they are,” a familiar voice came, before the person owning it plunked down beside you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. “Hi Sirius,” you gave him a tight-lipped smile. James sat across from him, beside Lily, and Remus had took a spot on the opposite side of you. “Hi Moony,” you had said when the brown haired boy ruffed your hair. “Hello to them but not to your own brother,” James frowned. You rolled your eyes playfully, “Hi James.”

The group made small talk and you (once again) tuned out. You sort of had a habit of that. Glancing around the Great Hall, your eye connected once again to your potions partner. Surprisingly, his were already set in your direction, glaring at the back of James’ head, then across to his brother. Then the grey-toned orbs clicked with your own. Hurriedly looking away, your cheeks burned at being caught staring at him. Weird, he was already watching us, you had thought. Shrugging off your thoughts, you decided to just forget about that embarrassing moment.

Trudging through the halls to potions class, you had arrived with a few minutes till class started. It was when you were gathering your things again and setting it down to the table that Regulus Black stepped over and took a place beside you. You were reminded of catching him watching your group yesterday, but quickly dismissed it.

“Hi,” you said while gathering the Polyjuice ingredients, not bothering to lift your head up to the boy. You glanced up to him with furrowed brows when you were met with no reply. He gazed down at you with a condescending look on his grey, dark eyes. “Right . . well, we should start. There’s 4 parts; we should have this done by the last class till it’s due.”

Regulus stood in front of the cauldron and you held the book in the crevice of your elbow. “It says here: Add 3 measures of fluxweed.” Grabbing the container of fluxweed, he added what was needed into the cauldron. “I don’t need you to read me out everything, I am not illiterate,” the Black brother grumbled, laced with an irritated tone. His voice was smooth and pronounced and you would’ve wished for him to speak a little more, had his words not been so unkind. It reminded you heavily of his elder brother’s; aristocratic and noble.

With a scoff, you threw the book down onto the table to the right of the boy. “Well, what do you suppose I do if you’re going to make the potion?” Regulus ignored you, not having a response to your question.

“Move.” You pushed Regulus out of the way of the cauldron, following the next step in the guide. “What do you think you’re doing?” His brows were angled down and his colourless eyes narrowed into a glare. “Well, if you won’t let me help, I’m not going to let you brew the whole thing. Who says you wont fuck it up?” “I would mess it up? God, you Potters are so obnoxious,” he spat.

“Mister Black, Miss Potter. Do we have a problem?” Slughorn asked the two of you. “No, Professor,” Regulus answered as quick as it was asked. He had reciprocated your actions, shoving you out of the way and taking control of the potion again. He grabbed your wrist in a tight, iron grip that it was almost sore. “Shut up, and do not cause another scene.” He glowered at you before finally letting go of your wrist. There was a red ring in the tracing of where he grasped your arm so roughly. You wouldn’t be surprised if it bruised.

The Marauders and you had sat in the Gryffindor common room along with one of your dorm mates, Marlene McKinnon. “Merlin, Sirius. Your brother is the biggest git I’ve ever met.” Sirius, who sat on the ground beside the fireplace, gave you a puzzled look. “Why? What’s he done?” You had explained the situation that had occurred during potions. Sirius had only replied with an ‘oh’. You rolled your eyes at the dry response but had left it at that.

Marlene spoke up from beside you on the couch. “Did you lot hear, Lucius Malfoy’s planning on joining the Death Eaters?” Her soft voice echoed through the empty common room. “He’s hardly actually going to join,” James spoke up, doubt written all over his face, “He barely left school. Only a couple years ago.”

“He was a Slytherin, them lot are the type. Horrid,” Marlene spoke again. The Death Eaters were starting to gain more members but you hadn’t thought people you knew would start joining.

Rising from your seat on the couch had caught Marlene’s attention. “Where are you going?” The bright blonde questioned you. “Just goin’ to check on Slughorn’s assignment. You want me to check yours? James, I’m borrowing the invisibility cloak.” You didn’t bother waiting for an answer before taking it.

“Yes, please. Thanks mate.” She flashed you a beaming smile and you exited your house’s common room.

It was late now and you were unsure if it was even a good idea leaving the common room at this time. The prefects were probably done their patrol by now, leaving just you and creepy old Filch wandering the halls alone. It was fine though, he wouldn’t be able to see you with the cloak on.

“Lumos,” you whispered, holding your wand out as the cloak draped over your lower arm. The tip of your vine wood wand came alight in a blue-white colour, brightening the hall for you to be able to roam freely with vision.

It wasn’t long till you navigated your way to the Potions class, carefully pushing the door ajar so that it wouldn’t let out it’s usual croaks. Upon stepping inside, your—well, James’ actually—invisibility cloak was thrown off and ditched onto the cold tiles of Slughorn’s classroom.

Stepping further into the classroom, majority of the room was dark, aside from a corner where your cauldron happened to be. An illuminating light, that appeared to be the Lumos charm, lit the crevice of the room. A dark figure stood with it’s back to you. Would it be too late to slip back on the cloak and run back to your dorm?

The answer to that was already decided when the figure spoke as it turned to your direction, “Who’s there?” It appeared to be the younger Black brother. When your eyes had met, his face quickly turned to a scowl.

“Oh, just you, Potter.” His voice seemed to be laced with venom when he had spat your surname. “What are you doing here?” You asked, cautiously stepping up to the cauldron and the angsty boy. Peering into the cauldron, your potion seemed to be doing fine. “What does it look like? Someone has to check on it, seeing as you don’t.” Regulus’ tone was harsh. You scratched the back of your head and walked over to another cauldron; Marlene and her partner’s. The boy just watched you as you checked if hers was going well.

“Sorry, I just forgot. You were the one who was so sure that you didn’t need my help anyway.” He just ignored your comment. “Listen, you can check on it on Thursday and I’ll check on it Saturday. We’ll keep watching it every two nights, taking turns. Alright with you?” He pondered for a minute over your decision before agreeing to it. “Alright.”

You walked into the great hall, venturing over to the Gryffindor table and taking a seat between Peter and James. “Morning,” you greeted, it being followed with repetition. “Big quidditch game this Friday; first of the season. You all coming to watch?” James asked to the group. “Obviously, when have I missed one,” you grinned up to him. You took pride in showing up to support him for his matches. He is your big brother, of course. “Who’re you playing?” Sirius questioned. “Ravenclaw,” James replied with a smirk.

“Pity, Sirius, that you got kicked off the team. You were probably the best beater we had, alongside Marlene,” you recalled. “I know, but I deserved it.,” Sirius groaned. A remorseful grin was evident on his face, recollecting the memory. “Of course, you deserved it after what you tried to do to Sev.” Lily had an angry frown on her face.

“Don’t know why you even hang out with that freak anyway,” Remus taunted. James joined the conversation again, “He’s pure evil.”

As Lily argued with the elder boys to defend her best friends name, you could feel eyes burning into the back of your head. You sat facing the Hufflepuff table, so the Ravenclaw and Slytherin tables were behind you. Glancing over your shoulder, you were encased in an uncomfortable sense of eye contact with Regulus Black himself. His eyes widened a little from their previous narrowed glare when yours connected but he glanced away just after.

The day had gone quickly. It was already noon, meaning it was time for Potions, seeing as it was a Wednesday. Marlene and you had headed together to class, arriving and taking your places at your own designated cauldrons. The black haired boy was already there.

“Have you started the next step?” You had asked, standing beside him and opening the textbook onto the right page again. “No, I need you to crush two lacewing flies.”

And, that’s how the rest of your potion classes with Regulus Black went. Just loitering alongside him and aimlessly following any instructions he would give you in silence. To your content, he hadn’t said anything patronising to you. But he hadn’t said anything to you, conversation wise either. That was, till the one today. You had been measuring out the bicorn horn, getting ready to crush it to a powder, when Regulus spoke up. “I’ve noticed how well Sirius and your little gang get along.”

You raised your head to look up at him with a ‘hm?’. “I’ve never saw him smile or laugh as much as he does with your lot in my entire life,” he continued. “Well, he is best friends with James,” you had piped up, slightly bemused on why he was bringing this up. He had refused to look at you, instead staring down into the brewing and bubbling potion. “Ah yes, I forgot about my replacement.” If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought he had a tinge of jealousy or resentment in his voice. Why would he be jealous?

“I wouldn’t call him a replacement. Sirius thinks highly of you, even if he doesn’t show it,” you had attempted to reassure him. This resulted in an irked scoff and finally, his eyes had met yours for the first time this whole class. “Thinks highly of me? That’s a proper joke. He doesn’t give a toss about me, seeing as he attempts to abandon me with our overbearing parents each Christmas and Summer. I’m sure he’s told you all about our loving mother.” His voice was edged with so much sarcasm and bitterness you could drown in it. His last words held a sardonic tone and made you feel tense. You didn’t know what to say, so you decided on not uttering a word.

It had been 2 days since your last conversation with Regulus Black. Luckily, it had been a Thursday, so you didn’t have to be in his grudgeful presence till Monday which was the last day anyway for this stupid project.

Once again, you had stolen James’ cloak, heading out after hours when all the prefects had already done their checks. It was your turn to watch over your potion. When Slughorn said that the students should look over their potions in the evenings, he probably didn’t intend to do it this late, but it was more fun like this. A twinge of excitement erupted in your chest thinking about it. You were nearly finished after weeks of begrudgingly stirring, chopping up and grinding ingredients and following orders.

Stepping soundlessly into the room, you crept over to the cauldron belonging to you and Regulus. You stirred the sludgy mixture with a tinge of disrelish, nearly gagging from how repulsive it was. You were unaware of the presence who joined you in the room mere minutes after; inching towards you, feet not making a squeak against the shadowy tiles.

After concluding that your assignment was going fine, you had turned to head back to the Gryffindor dorms. Your heart jumped and you let out a quiet, shocked gasp. A man stood behind you. Upon seeing his face, your shoulders relaxed and eyebrows twisted into a frown—although, not genuinely cross. The corners of his lips pricked up into a grin (which looked like he was attempting to conceal) before falling back to their normal, neutral position.

“Merlin, Black. Nearly gave me a heart attack there,” you lightly scolded. “Why’re you here? It’s my day to check.” He walked past you over to the cauldron, arms brushing and you felt a light rush of breeze. He was now standing to your right and you turned to face him once again as he spoke, “Couldn’t sleep. I decided to check on the potion, there isn’t much else to do in this bloody castle.”

You had replied with a mere ‘oh’. He gazed into the potion for a minute, then his eyes met yours. Embarrassingly, you scrambled to pick up your wand, then walked over to the door to grab the cloak that lay sprawled out on the floor.

“Are you in a rush?” His looming voice echoed through the room. You hesitated before replying, “No.” His next words had sprung some surprise in you, but you tried to not show it on your features; instead, aiming for a calm expression. “Would you like to go for a walk?”

After reluctantly contemplating the scenarios in your head of what he was trying to get at with this—possibly trying to attack you in a more secretive place, no one would catch him. No, that’s silly. If he wanted to attack you he would’ve already done it. Plus, he isn’t pure evil like ‘Snivellus’ Snape; and he would have no reason to ambush you—you agreed: “Alright.” His expression seemed to slightly change to a aplomb manner.

Following Regulus and sauntering through the halls together, some minutes in pure silence, some in light chatter, you both had managed to end up in the Hogwarts Astronomy Tower. The previously harsh wind settled to a leisurely breeze. Regulus had mimicked your actions, leaning against the metal railings of the tower. The whole atmosphere held a sort of serenity you felt that you’ve never experienced before; you were friends with the Marauders, of course, and nothing was ever tranquil with them boys.

Your gaze had flickered over to the boy beside you. His long, black hair was moving delicately in the zephyr. It reminded you of gentle waves moving through the ocean, but you then realised that was a silly comparison. You never really took your time to observe Regulus Black. His face was strongly chiselled—almost as if he was carved by that muggle, Michelangelo—elegant looking, really. He looked similar to Sirius, just younger and with his own distinctive characteristics.

Looking away as to not get caught staring like before, you realised you were both basking in silence for a few minutes. That was until you looked back to him and noticed Regulus’ dubious conscience to break it. Finally, he spoke. “I’m—Sorry for freaking out in potions the last day,” he blurted out in a weak whisper. “Wha-” I replied, confused for a second before speaking again—as so he didn’t feel sheepish. “. . It’s fine.”

‘Serenity.’ You could almost laugh if you were alone right now. How ironic, the thought of the once calm atmosphere being shrivelled up and thrown out like paper, replaced with this unbearably silent tension. “Sirius meant the world to me, growing up. He was like a hero, in my eyes,” Regulus’ voice was more clear now, and he let out an airy laugh in spite of himself. “Merlin, I don’t know why I’m telling you this, you don’t even want to—”

“No. It’s alright.” Your voice was firm, encouraging him to continue; and so he did. “I-We—We did everything. Now, he does it all with James. Wont even spare me a glance in the halls, during breakfast.” His voice trailed off and he went silent again.

His eyes haven’t met yours in a while and you were guessing they might’ve been glossy, and he’d have been embarrassed if they were. “Regulus. Your brother, Sirius. He loves you, so much more than you’d think. He just . . doesn’t express it well. He doesn’t know how to. It’s spiteful. He just feels different from you; always going on about how you’re the golden child and he’s the black sheep.” Black sheep of the Blacks. Ironic, yet again.

You both savoured the silence for a few minutes, settling on cherishing the midnight sky and how the starts shimmered like glitter. Regulus decided to change the topic, “Did you know, my family are all named after astrology, stars, constellations and all? Most, anyway; my ancestors must’ve been interested in sabaism.”

His appealing voice caught my attention and I turned to glance at him. “Really? Is Regulus one?” He adorned a small smile now. It was refreshing after being caught for days in his usual tempers. “Yes. My father’s called Orion. That’s a constellation. Sirius, the dog star. Orion’s dog.”

You listened attentively as he rambled on. “My cousin, Bellatrix, named after a star. Andromeda’s a constellation. I can go on further but we’d be here all night.” His silvery eyes shone in the night sky—it was majestic—and met yours, accompanied with a glowing smile on his sharp traits. You just returned the smile.

“You know, you’re quite alright, Potter.” This took you by surprise. Regulus Black (sort of) complimenting you? You’d have never thought the day would come. With a light laugh and smug but suppressed grin, you replied: “Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself, Black.” This persuaded a chuckle to slip past his pink lips. It was a deep, short laugh.

Letting a few more minutes pass up in the astronomy tower, you both had now agreed to head back to your common rooms. Now walking down the halls with the tips of your wands lighting the way, you had been making small talk with the boy.

How unexpected this whole situation was. If you had told yourself a week ago that you’d be wandering the halls past midnight with Regulus Arcturus Black, you would’ve been in disbelief.

James’ invisibility cloak was draped casually around your shoulders. The pale moonlight shone through the windows of the castle, painting streaks across Regulus and your faces’ each time passing one.

“You know,” you paused for a minute before continuing. “You’re welcome to stay with my family and I over Christmas.” You noticed the conflicted look on his face upon hearing your words, but nevertheless, kept talking. “I’m sure my parents won’t mind. James has Remus over each year, and Sirius when he can. You’d be able to spend more time with your brother.”

He let out a mockingly amused snigger. “I think my parents would go mental if they found out both their heirs have gone rebel.” You let out a small giggle with this but then your lips settled to a gentle, closed smile. Regulus seemed to mirror your actions and you had settled into a comfortable silence again.

Till, of course, that was broken once again. But this time, not by you nor Regulus. “Who’s there?” A gruff voice echoed behind you both from past the corner of the long corridor. Shit! You had completely forgotten about Filch. Giving Regulus a panicked look—to which he shot straight back—you quickly whispered: “Nox,” and extinguished the light from your wand. Regulus had done the same so now you were both lost in the dark halls of Hogwarts, only having the blue-toned moonlight as a source to see as it glimmered off your silver bracelet.

Unexpectedly, the cloak was stripped from your shoulders, leaving a slightly cold breeze in its place. “What are you—” You whisper-screamed to Regulus but you were interrupted when his dainty fingers wrapped around your face, his palm covering your mouth.

He gave you a stern look, as if to say, ‘just shut up and trust me,’ and so you did. He threw the cloak across the two of you, backing you up against the wall (nearly knocking a painting down in the process).

Under the cloak, it was darker than before and quite stuffy. You had never shared the cloak with someone else like the Marauders did, so you weren’t used to this. Your hands reached up and removed the hand splayed across your lips. Your position was also uncomfortable, being pressed up against the wall with Regulus towering over you. It seemed like all your senses were heightened.

One arm was just above your head, holding himself up and he brought the other in between you both to hold up his wand. “Lumos,” he said in a sotto voice. The light was dimmer than usual but lit up between both your faces.

Footsteps approached. Filch was drawing nearer and nearer. Your eyes connected to his and in this lighting, you had realised how small the proximity between you really was, causing a small pink to tint your cheeks. It seems as he noticed too, as the sharp corners of his cheekbones were softened by a dull rouge.

It was as if you were inspecting him under a microscope. All his features were so close to your reach; all displayed right in front of your eyes. Eyes. His had a thin lining of artic blue around his pupils which you only discovered by being this close to him. They stared right back at you and you felt the blush crawl all through the back of your neck and hung high on your cheeks. “What are you gawping at?” His tone was soft yet also appeared harsh. Guess he’s still the same Regulus. “Sorry.”

Merlin, time drove so slowly when you were waiting for it to go. You felt hot and self-conscious under Regulus’ gaze, but attempted to shrug it off. I’m sure he’s just as embarrassed of this situation as you felt. Thinking back to what you said earlier, elegant was an understatement; this boy was angelic.

After what felt like forever, Filch finally came creeping down the corridor. Your body made sure you were aware of your heightened rubatosis as Filch drew closer. Regulus and you had waited with baited breath as he passed. Your eyes followed Filch from behind Regulus but it seems his never left you. Luckily, he didn’t suspect nor notice you two at all—well, how could he when you were both under the invisibility cloak.

Once he had turned the corner, both of you had collectively let out a sigh (one you didn’t even know you were holding in). Regulus had waited a small bit longer—probably just incase Filch comes back—and then stepped away from you. The invisibility cloak fell to your feet, and you hesitantly disconnected the eye contact to pick it up. You were sure your cheeks were still rosy as you could feel the heat still burning from them.

The rest of the journey back was glazed over with a tense, suffocating silence. You didn’t know what to say after that and you doubt Regulus did either. Eventually, you had reached the changing staircases. “Goodnight,” you bid him goodbye as you treaded up the stairs to Gryffindor’s common room.

Turning your back away from him and following up the staircase, you had heard a small ‘goodnight’ come from Regulus. That night you had went to bed with ruddy cheeks and a buzzing in your stomach.

It was the day that your potion assignment was due and frankly, you were quite nervous about it. You had desperately hoped you’d get a good grade, seeing as you really had tried with this project, and the amount of time spent on it.

Marlene walked alongside you out of Transfiguration. “Godric, Professor McGonagall really has it out for me,” she complained, her brows furrowed and whiny. “What makes you think that?” Your blonde friend had nearly answered before you even questioned her, “She always gets cross when something goes wrong for me, but she just loves bloody Dirk Cresswell. Never gives out to him,” she sneered. You both made your way to the Potions classroom. “Think it’s because I’m half-blood.”

You let out a defeated sigh, “Marlene, you do realise Professor McGonagall is half-blood too . .” Her annoyed expression fell and Marlene just replied with an ‘oh’.

Slughorn was now going through the room, grading each potion. You heard a couple ‘acceptable’s, two ‘exceeds expectations,’ one ‘outstanding’ and even three ‘poor’s. Once your potion was graded, you were dismissed from the class.

You waited anxiously with Regulus standing beside you. Neither of you had said anything yet; you were far too nervous to, and still a little embarrassed from the other night. You would’ve hated to have spent 3 weeks on this just for it to turn out to be shit.

At long last, Professor Slughorn stood infront of you both, peering into the small cauldron. “Outstanding, Miss Potter and Mister Black. Well done, you’re both dismissed.”

Your lips twisted into a proud grin, but you puffed out a small flow of air, trying to keep the grin in that just grew wider. Following Slughorn’s orders, you had rushed out of the classroom and headed a little down the halls from the class.

“Wait, Potter,” you heard in that oh-so-familiar voice. Turning around, you faced Regulus Black with a wide smirk. “Yes, Black?” He swiftly caught up to you, towering over in front of you again. “I just wanted to say, good job. Wouldn’t mind working with you again, as partners.” He let a smug grin adorn his lips. “Thanks. That wouldn’t be too bad, I suppose.” You flashed him a pearly-white smile, before turning back and continuing to walk down the halls.

It had been a few weeks since you were graded in potions and much to your content, Regulus Black and you had grown closer. You would even dare call yourself friends with the boy. Your brother was a little skeptical about the friendship—as well as Sirius, and the other two Marauders too—but you assured them it was fine.

Speaking of Sirius, his birthday had passed and Lily, James, Remus, Peter and you had arranged a little ‘Sweet-Sixteen’ birthday for him. It was a fun little get together, only consisting of a few friends.

The cool breeze flowed gently through your hair. “You know, I don’t really see why you’re friends with all them horrid boys. Like seriously, Barty Crouch, Evan Rosier, even Snape. Cop on, Black.” You both sat on the course ground of the Astronomy Tower. He let out a breathy laugh, “You think I’m friends with Snape? Not even people in my house like Snape. His only friends are Mulciber and Lily Evans.”

He continued to talk, defending his friends, “and, who do you suppose I be friends with? Xenophilius Lovegood? He’s an odd one.” You let out a strong laugh, tossing your head back before looking to Regulus. Regulus smiled back at you as you laughed. “Poor guy, he’s quite nice actually,” you backed up the Ravenclaw boy.

“Yes! Come on, James!” You screamed, throwing your arms up in celebration as your older brother threw the quaffle into a hoop, marking his third goal for Gryffindor. You didn’t mind all the judging looks you earned.

Gryffindor was currently in the lead against Slytherin thanks to James. The commentators voice boomed through the air as each player whizzed past, doing their part for the team.

“And another ten points for Gryffindor!” The crowed around you roared, cheering proudly for their team. “If we keep this up,” Lily said, “we’ll be in the final in no time.” You just nodded to her, eyes still following the quaffle being passed around.

Twenty minutes passed, Slytherin had scored two goals and Gryffindor, one. “What’s that?” The commentator asked rhetorically, “Regulus Black, Slytherin’s seeker has just secured their win, catching the Golden Snitch!” Once again, the Gryffindor crowd went wild, everyone being shocked seeing as how well we had this in our grasp.

Although you were from Gryffindor, you were still just as happy for Regulus being able to win the match. You would’ve even cheered for him—like you do when he’s not playing your team—but you probably would’ve gotten disowned from your own house.

‘James isn’t going to be happy with this,’ you thought. You made your way down and back to the castle, waiting for James and the rest of the boys in the Gryffindor common room.

After waiting for fifteen minutes, they all trudged in, tired and grumpy. You walked over to your brother. “Well done, James! You played so well, tough luck though,” you smiled to him, hoping he wasn’t in too much of a mood. “Thanks,” he ruffled your hair with his sweaty palm, grumbling the reply. “Merlin, you’re so sweaty. Get off me!” You playfully shoved him away, earning a grin from him.

You headed out from the common room and made your way through the halls. Eventually, you reached the Slytherin common room. Leaning against the wall beside the door, you were waiting for someone to head in or come out so you could ask for Regulus.

It took a couple minutes before you spotted Evan Rosier coming your way. “Rosier! Perfect,” you exclaimed as he walked up to the door. “What are you doing here?” His voice was cold but it didn’t seem intentional, instead genuinely asking why. “Would you do me a favor and get Regulus, please?”

He waited for a minute and contemplated his options. “He’s probably fairly busy with his win. But if I do?” You rolled your eyes. Merlin, are all Slytherins so greedy? “Really?” You puffed out a sigh, “I’ll . . do your Ancient Runes homework.” “Deal,” he replied with a grin, “Thanks Potter.”

The blonde headed into the common room and later returned with the dark headed boy a couple minutes after. Regulus wandered out past the door and you stepped up to greet him, Rosier heading back into the room.

“Reg!” You smiled to him, gaining one back. “Well done. I can’t believe you managed that, we were going so well.” You folded your arms across your chest and stood in front of him. “What can I say? Being a great seeker just runs in my blood.” That bit was quite true; his cousin, Narcissa Black was Slytherin’s best seeker, your generation would say so anyway.

“Oh, shut up, you snob,” you giggled. He just held a content smile on his face. “Also . . I have a proposal,” you started. His eyebrow quirked up suspiciously at this, “I’m not sure I should be scared or not.” You flashed a beaming smile again. “No, no. It’s not anything bad,” you reassured him.

He listened contently as your proposed your idea, “I was wondering . . if you’d be able to convince your parents to let you stay at Hogwarts during Christmas break? We could hang out more and you wouldn’t have to put up with them. ” You bit your lip anxiously as you waited to hear what he had to say. His expression didn’t reveal his reactions at all. It was nerve wracking.

He scratched the back of his head, furrowing his brows a little with an unsure smile, “Uh, I’m not sure if they’d let me.” Your face must’ve fell because his eyes widened a little and he quickly spoke again. “Not that I don’t want to—of course. I’ll still ask,” he smiled at you, trying to reassure you he wanted to stay too. “I’ll tell them there’s going to be extra quidditch practices and I need to stay.”

You smiled at him gratefully. “Thanks, Reg. You don’t have to if you don’t want to, you know.”“No, I do,” he quickly shot back. “No promises though.” You just chuckled, “Alright.”

And so, you spent Christmas break at Hogwarts with Regulus Black, instead of returning home with James, Remus and Sirius.

This was your first time spending Christmas at Hogwarts; there was barely anyone there. You noticed how empty the halls were compared to normal. It was nice though, calming.

The dull winter light shone through the windows of your dorm. It was extremely quiet. You didn’t think you’d miss how loud the girls would be in the mornings till you woke up alone in your dorm room.

It wasn’t long till you were dressed in your own clothes, happy that you had an occasion for not wearing your robes, and ready to head to the Great Halls. Upon arriving, you had realised that you were one of three students in Gryffindor who stayed at Hogwarts (or atleast, was awake and getting breakfast at the Hall).

You sat down at your house table and placed a slice of toast on your plate. The bench creaked as someone sat beside you. Looking up while taking a bite from your toast, you smiled, seeing Regulus sit beside you. “Morning, Reg.”

He greeted you back, grabbing some food for himself and placing it onto his plate. “This is the Gryffindor table. If one of your Slytherins saw you here, they’d never let this go,” you teased. He just shoved you playfully before stuffing a slice of toast in his mouth. “Not very prim and proper for a Black.” You let out a small giggle as he gave you a sidelong glance.

After making light chat to your Slytherin friend, it was a couple hours later now and you had been granted permission to head to Hogsmeade.

The ground was littered with light snow and it looked like a pristine, white blanket from a bird’s eye view. Your arms were wrapped around Regulus’ waist and your head lay gently on his back shoulder, peering down at the ground as you giggled and marvelled at everything. Regulus wasn’t talking much but, neither were you, instead being too busy gazing at the forests and rivers down below.

You landed down just a few metres away from Hogsmeade, Regulus letting you off the broomstick first before getting off himself. “That was fun,” you smiled. You weren’t used to riding your broomstick much, seeing as you don’t play quidditch so you didn’t have much use of it. “Yeah.”

The snow was crunchy under your boots as you both strolled into the High Street of Hogsmeade. “I need to get some things,” you told the boy, “I’ll catch you later. I’ll meet you at the Three Broomsticks.” He just nodded, carrying his broom by his side. “Alright. Half an hour sound good?”

Regulus went on his way as you trotted down to Honeydukes. You weren’t sure what to get everyone as gifts so you decided upon this. You already bought James a new quidditch set as the one at home was all battered and bruised up. You had bought Sirius some new cologne he had been talking about—that you assumed he only wanted because Remus had complimented it a while back—and you had got Remus a few books about magical creatures. Peter would like a box of chocolate frogs from Honeydukes, seeing as they were his favourite.

You had also got things for Lily, Marlene and the other girls. But you just couldn’t decide what to get Regulus. You decided to leave it and that you’d figure something out.

Honeydukes was a cosy little shop located in the centre of Hogsmeade. You entered the shop, alerting the shopkeeper with a small ring from the bell. Rows and rows of sweets were piled up all the way to the ceiling on teal-turquoise shelves. This really was a sweet tooth’s heaven.

“Ah, Miss Potter, how can I assist you?” The shopkeeper greeted. “Hello!” You sent him a charming smile, “Could I get a box of chocolate frogs, please.” The shopkeeper was lovely, helping you and even wrapping it up for you in a delicate, silver wrapping paper. You thanked him on your way out.

Now, time to find Regulus something. You wandered through Hogsmeade till you approached a shop supplied with quidditch items. Peering through the window, the newly released, Nimbus 1009 laying gleaming in its spot. A new broom, of course! You knew that being a Black meant he could probably afford as many of these as he’d like, but it’s the thought that counts.

It had now been half an hour since you last saw Regulus and you sat alone at a wooden table by the fireplace, sipping away at your butterbeer. A small bell jingled as people entered and your head raised, waiting for Regulus to come. You’d already bought a butterbeer for him, and it sat longingly across from you on the table.

Once again, the bell had rung. In entered your friend, taking a seat across from you. “Finally,” you huffed, “took you long enough. We said half an hour.” He rolled his eyes and grinned, taking a swing from the drink in front of him. A small cream moustache lay across the top of his lips till he licked them, then spoke, “Oh shush. I’m only five minutes past, thanks for this.” He gestured to the butterbeer, drinking some more.

After finishing your beverages, you and Regulus had headed back to Hogwarts. Regulus had flown you both back on his broomstick once again and you were back in no time; flying was much quicker than taking the path over to Hogwarts.

You woke up, rubbing your eyes and yawning—still slightly tired. Then you shot up from your bed. It’s Christmas! You hurriedly ran to get changed and rushed down to the great hall.

Regulus was already seated at the Slytherin table. Once he spotted you, a friendly smile broke out alone his features. You were quick to fire one back, darting over to where he sat. You plunked down across from the boy.

“Merry Christmas, Reg!” You cheered, feeling giggly and excited. “Happy Christmas,” he smirked back. He looked far more posh today than normal. His jet-black hair was swept back with more gel and he held a more presentable, Black family look today—if that makes sense.

You both shared light conversation over breakfast, agreeing to share presents tonight at the astronomy tower. You both had received letters and gifts from family, opening them together at the dining table. The whole day was spent with Regulus, but you didn’t mind, you enjoyed his company. ‘It’s so strange how I once thought he was an absolute prick—not even too long ago as well,’ you thought to yourself.

It was now half-past eight and Regulus was waiting for you on the astronomy tower, leaning on the rails holding a small box in his hands. You reached the top of the tower, finding Regulus standing which his back to you.

You walked up to him, the broom clasped behind your back—trying to conceal it, but that’s a bit hard seeing as it’s a whole broomstick. “Reguluss,” you purred, catching the attention of the boy. He turned around with a grin and you could say you were equally as excited as him. He also held something behind his back with one hand, not letting you see it.

“Open yours first,” you smiled, handing over the present to him. It was quite obvious what you got him. You weren’t the best gift wrapper. “I wonder what it is,” he sardonically chuckled, unwrapping it and seeing that it was the newly released broom.

His eyes met yours and his smile stretched up to the bottom of his cheeks. “Thank you, shit, I didn’t expect this one. This is brand new, Merlin’s beard, not even my parents would buy me something like this.” You smiled at him and he placed the broom to the ground before scurrying forwards, coming towards you.

You weren’t sure what he was doing till his arms wrapped around your waist and he spun you around. You gripped his shoulders, looking into his eyes. “Regulus! Put me down,” you giggled loudly.

After spinning you lightly, he placed you down, keeping one hand still on your waist—which made your cheeks heat up, but it wasn’t noticeable in the dim lighting—but bringing the other between you. On his palm, a small, forest green box. “For you, m’lady.” He held a small grin on his face, and you just let out an airy laugh at him. “Thank you, good sir,” you replied, picking up the box.

Unwrapping the thin golden ribbon around it, inside the box revealed a silver necklace, a charm on it that read your name. “Regulus . .” you marvelled at it, taking it out from the box. “It’s gorgeous.”

He smiled gently at you, taking it from your grasp and walking around you. You eyed him as he passed, feeling his presence right behind you. “Can you move your hair?” He asked, and you pulled it together and held it to the side as he wrapped the necklace around your neck with delicate hands.

“Thank you,” you murmured, a faint blush on your cheeks upon feeling his hand brush the rear of your neck. The stroke of his fingers sent goosebumps tingling down your spine. A strange eruption of tickles could be felt in your stomach, like butterflies.

He stood behind you for a moment before you turned around to face him, showing the necklace sitting high upon your collarbones. Your cheeks were still pink, you knew as you could feel the slight burn of them.

The distance between you both was thin, you could faintly feel his breaths. His icey, storm grey eyes peered down at you, flickering along the plains of your face. You felt small under his brooding stare.

He looked like he was conflicted, eyes switching from your eyes to down your face. You matched his actions unconsciously.

Before you knew it, Regulus leaned in, closing the gap between the both of you. Subconsciously, you closed your eyes and mirrored his actions. You felt his lips graze yours lightly, not fully touching. Oh, them lips. How soft and plump they felt.

And then, he pressed them against yours. It felt magical (which is ironic, considering you were living in the Wizarding World). Your lips moved in sync. Regulus’ other hand moved to hold the opposite side of your waist, pulling you a little closer to him.

Your hands flew up to place themselves on top of his chest. After a few more kisses, you pushed away, gasping for air but trying not to show it. “Reg—” You started but was quickly cut off by him. “Don’t say anything. I’m sorry,” your eyebrows furrowed at the boy but he wasn’t looking, instead looking down at his shoes.

“I shouldn’t done that.” One hand was brought up to his mouth and he slid his fingers across his lips, wiping them off. “Wha—What?” You asked. “No, it’s alright,” you assured him. “I . . . I liked it.” Your fingers fidgeted behind your back and as soon as his stormy eyes, whipped up to meet yours, you sent him a small, closed smile.

It was only now that you had finally realised how you felt about the boy. The way your heart fluttered every time he smiled at you. The delicious ache in your chest you got every time you laughed with him or he laughed because of you. You’d fallen for Regulus Black—and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

The proximity between you two had decreased as you stepped closer to him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, fingers settling to play with the baby hairs at the nape of his neck. You placed a gentle kiss on his lips once again; then one on each side of the corner of his lips. They twisted into a grin. But not a mischievous one, this time, an endearing one that made your stomach flutter.

Everything going on at this moment made your stomach flutter. “Would you . . . want to be my girlfriend?” Hesitation was evident in his voice. You could almost giggle at how cute you thought he was when he was shy. “Of course, Regulus.” You both shared a smile and the corner of his eyes crinkled.

This time, you leaned forward, initiating the kiss. Your mouths slotted together and his hands slid further across your waist till you were completely in his arms. It was obvious, feeling him grin against you with your lips pressed together and next thing you knew, you were being spun around, causing you to erupt into a fit of giggles.

It was now coming towards the end of June. Christmas break was now long past and you and Regulus had been going out for almost six months. You didn’t bother keeping it a secret, and Regulus’ pals didn’t mind so much—only considering you were pure-blooded. Not keeping it hidden doesn’t mean you went prancing around letting everyone know. Also, it doesn’t mean you wanted Sirius to find out on his own . .

You were sitting in the Gryffindor common room one night. The girls had already gone off to bed but you decided to stay up a little bit longer with your brother and his friends.

Of course, Peter had already gone to bed as well as Remus leaving shortly after. They were so preoccupied with their exams and having good sleep for them. But, they were doing their O.W.L.s, so you understand why they were so stressed and pressured to do well. Sirius never bothered with exams, so he didn’t mind staying up. Naturally, he dragged James along with him to stay in the common room.

You lay, sprawled across the couch, legs sitting on top of Sirius’ and James stood by the fireplace. You were getting tired. Your eyelids struggling to keep themselves open in the cosy heat the fire provided.

That was till Sirius blurted out: “Are you shagging my brother?” As if it meant nothing. James’ head whipped over to look at Sirius as fast as yours did. Eyes blown wide and mouth gone dry all of a sudden, you stumbled over a response. “I—What.” Your cheeks were scarlet red and burning with embarrassment.

“You heard what I said,” Sirius shrugged nonchalantly. “Sirius! No, I’m not.” James hadn’t said a word, still staring at Sirius with a gaping expression. “Are you snogging Regulus?” He continued to pry with these personal questions.

You moved your legs off him, sitting up on the sofa and wrapping your arms around your knees, burying your head into your the crevice between them both. “Uhm . . . yeah,” you managed to squeak out.

Unfortunately, Sirius didn’t quite catch that, asking you to repeat yourself. “Yeah. Merlin’s beard, I was gonna tell you.” You ran your hands down your face with a discontent huff. “I’m not mad.” Sirius let out an amused laugh.

You peaked one eye past two fingers, looking at the dark haired boy. He held an entertained grin. Lowering your hands, you looked over to James who happened to have the exact same smirk plastered on his face. “Can’t believe you’ve snogged someone before our Moony,” James sniggered. “Oh, shut it.” Even though there was a slight harsh tone to your words, you sent the two boys a smirk.

“How fascinating!” You beamed at your boyfriend, lying on a slightly-damp, patch of grass as he flew not too high above you, using the broom you had gotten him. “Your birthday also happens to be our 6 month anniversary. That’s half a year!” It was two days before Regulus’ birthday.

He replied with a small chuckle. “Pity, I wont be able to see you for either,” you frowned slightly. Regulus returned to the ground, taking a seat beside you and relaxing back. “I know,” said Regulus, “but there’s nothing we can do.” You sighed, “Yeah, I guess so.”

Regulus’ birthday arrived. You hid a small, navy blue box under your bed so the other girls wouldn’t pry and nosy about. Finally, you were able to give him his present which excited you, hoping he’d like it as much as you anticipated.

And now it was time. You both decided to meet at your usual spot, the Astronomy Tower. You arrived first, waiting not too long for Regulus to show. You scurried over to him, meeting in the middle.

“Happy birthday, Reg!” You greeted him (for the tenth time today). You smiled brightly, the outer area of your eyes crinkling gently. “Thank you, doll.” The nickname made your stomach flutter delectably.

The box in your hands was brought out in front of you for him to see. He smiled to you, taking it from your hands and placing a tender kiss to your lips. “What’s this?” He asked, in which you replied: “Open it.”

He carefully took apart the bow you had done in it, lifting the lid off the box. Inside, a jar of green, shimmery powder was placed. Regulus reached his pale hands into the box, plucking the jar from it. “Floo powder,” grinned Regulus. You weren’t sure what to make of his reaction.

“It’s so—so you can see me during summer. And get away from your family, and do what you want with it, of course.” You stumbled over your words nervously and the black-haired boy placed a peck on your temple. “I know,” he said languidly, “thanks, sweets.” Another pet name he used frequently.

His dainty fingers lifted your chin up, pulling you into him and smirking against your lips. He kissed you gently, backed off after one kiss, then leaned in again, trying to get as close to you as possible. His arms wrapped around your waist, yours pulling at his hair gingerly.

You were both practically devouring each other, not even bothering to separate for air. You accidentally tugged hard, eliciting a guttural groan from Regulus. “‘m sorry,” you mumbled, lips still grazing his. He pushed further into your face, connecting them once again.

Finally, he pulled away again. Your noses were still abrading against each other and lips softly touching as well. “I have something for you,” he whispered against your mouth, breath coming out in small puffs.

You pulled away fully now, holding onto his shoulders. He brought out his wand with one hand, muttering an ‘accio’ but you didn’t hear what he was summoning.

A petite bouquet of blood red roses and pristine white baby breath came to his clutch and he handed them over to you. “It’s . . ehm, red because your Gryffindor, and the leaves—I guess, are green. Like Slytherin.” He chuckled nervously, hand immediately going to scratch the rear of his head once you took the flowers from his grip.

Before smiling at him, you took a whiff of the flowers. They smelled gorgeous and light. “Thank you, Reg.” You leaned onto your tippy toes and gave him a peck on each cheek, then a prolonged kiss to his lips.

Summer days drifted away with the wind. It had already been two weeks into your holidays. Regulus has visited you once so far, you both going on a walk through a muggle park. He sends letters regularly. They always came sealed with a family crest stamp, and written in elegant handwriting with obsidian-coloured ink.

You wrote back as well, sealing the end of each letter with a lipstick mark (partly because you wanted to be romantic, partly because you thought it looked nice). He promised to visit you soon, and soon would be today.

The both of you were now in your bedroom. Regulus was laying down on your bed, and you were atop of him. Your mouths fit like jigsaws and your tongues danced gracefully. Silent moans slipped from each others lips every once in a while. It was bliss, you thought. His hands were placed on your waist, sliding up and down it gently, causing your shirt to ride up slightly in unison.

Three booming knocks came to your door and you heard James scream your name from outside the oak wood. Your eyes shot open and you scrambled off your boyfriend. “Shit.” An alarmed expression lay on his sharp features and you wish you had time to laugh at him. He hurried over to your wardrobe, trying to shove himself into the cramped space. You stifled a giggle at him and shut the door for him.

“What?” You rolled your eyes at James standing at your door, giving him a harsh glare. “Where. Is. My. Invisibility. Cloak?” He interrogated—or more so, demanded. You pushed your palm to greet your forehead, sighing heavily. With an irritated tone, you replied, “I don’t know, James. You used it last, idiot.”

He groaned, storming back over to your door. “Fine. But if you use it without asking, I—you’ll pay,” grumbled James. “You only use it to sneak out to go drinking every once in a while. Don’t blame me again, or I might just snitch on you,” you sneered. James just sent you a look, slamming the door on the way out.

“Merlin, what a cunt.” Your mood was instantly switched when you looked over to the wardrobe. “Regulus, you can come out.” Muffled words were coming from the wardrobe and you burst out laughing upon realising he was trapped in. You let him out, of course, but only after a couple laughs.

That was the peak. After that event, all went down hill. A week following Regulus’ visit, Sirius had burst into your home, looking wrecked and in disarray. He explained to James that he ran away from home. They were pressuring him to follow a path he didn’t want to walk along. Your family (including yourself aswell,) welcomed him in with open arms.

Regulus’ letters slowed and they held a sort of edge to them that you couldn’t explain. He also hadn’t used the floo powder you gifted him to visit you. You speculated his parents might’ve found it and confiscated it, but there was no evidence for that.

But when you returned to school for your sixth year, nothing felt the same. And nothing would feel the same again. The war had caused a split between people. Most older Slytherins had joined the Dark Lord, bearing a mark on their arm to show their loyalties.

The first time you saw Regulus was at King’s Cross. You boarded the train with your brother, Remus, Sirius and Peter. Watching all the new first years bid farewell to their parents, your eyes scanned across the crowds of people.

Eventually, they landed on Regulus and the Blacks walking over to the train. He bared a stoic look with his parents. His face looking paler and sharper than ever. They didn’t say much to each other upon his departure.

Once you arrived at Hogwarts, you were too busy unpacking and greeting the girls to find Regulus yet. It wasn’t long till you were able to, sharing potions class again this year. The time whizzed by, and now you stood outside the classroom, waiting for your boyfriend to exit as well.

You noticed him walk out the doors. He immediately tensed when he noticed you standing there. “Regulus.” You tried to send him a comforting smile, but it was so hard these days with everything going on around you. “Hello, doll.” The name still made your chest squeeze and brought a push of confidence in you.

You were shocked to find out how cold he seemed this year. You hadn’t expected the drastic change in his behaviour, even towards you. But you attempted to ignore it, and the slight pit you felt in your stomach upon noticing it.

Over the months, your relationship with Regulus morphed into . . . a routine. Something that consisted of arguing, making up, then saying goodbye to each other without any other conversation. Your chats weren’t filled with laughter and smiles like they used to, instead replaced with this. He did seem to be trying to return to the old Regulus you had known, just struggling.

Your last straw was one unfortunate, February night. “I’m so sick of this! Regulus. Look at me!” You were screaming out at him on top of the Astronomy Tower, your usual hangout spot.

His grey eyes met yours, furrowed angrily and slightly glazed over. Rivers of tears were already running from yours and the skin around them was red and puffed up. “You’ve changed. And I want to help you, but you’re not letting me.” The distance between you both was slim.

You rubbed your eyes, your mind attempting to tear your hands off to prevent making them even more red and sore. At your disbelief, he took a step forward, wrapping his arms around your waist. Your arms crept around his shoulders, head buried in the crook of his neck and soaking his shirt with tears. This felt faintly familiar.

“I’m sorry, doll,” he whispered in your ear. Not moving from that position, you both stood their, relishing in each other’s presence. Aside from every other argument that happened this year, this one felt different. You felt like he might actually be coming back to you. “I love you, Regulus. But I need you to return to me,” you sniffled through weak sobs. “I love you too.”

In that moment, you felt happy. This was your Regulus. The one you had grown so fond over.

But happiness can only last for so long, right?

He pushed you back slightly, looking into your eyes. Under the dim moonlight, two small remnants of streams from his tears lay down his cheeks. His hand clutched your cheek, rubbing a soft circle with his thumb. “I—I have something to show you.”

All of a sudden, guilt and shame took over his features. He pulled his arm away from your face, using it to uncover his sleeve on the opposite arm. His skin. His pale, soft, smooth, oh lovely skin, was flawed and a Dark Mark was engraved in it. A skull and a snake in black markings.

A choked out sob forced itself from the depths of your throat. A pit formed in your stomach and you shoved him back, away from you. “I—” He started, but you shouted over him. “Don’t. No. I will . . I will not stand to be with a Death Eater.”

He called your name, pleading. The only colour on his face was the burning red of his puffy eyes. “Please . . I didn’t—”

“I’m sorry Regulus.” You were sobbing now, trying to control your shuddering words. “I won’t do it. I never thought you had it in you.” Your words were laced with venom. Each one you spat felt as if you dug a knife further into the pit in your stomach. “Please! You don’t understand,” he strained. “I ha—”

“We’re done.” He didn’t say anything else. Instead, he just stared into your eyes longingly.

That was a month ago. Now, your entire relationship with Regulus, the walls he held up that you took time breaking down, were now rebuilt and more durable than ever. Whenever you saw him in potions class, or in the halls, or even during meals, most time he’d be staring at you with guilt-filled eyes.

You felt aches each time you noticed his glances, but not the aches you used to love; this time they were sore, painful, heart-aches. But you tried to push through them.

Of course, you still loved him. It was hard trying not to. But you managed to slowly distance yourself from your feelings and continue the mundane routine of being a Hogwarts student.

Your brother, Sirius, Remus, and surprisingly, even Peter had all felt the change in your attitude. Not only had Regulus turned into a hollow shell of himself, but your split had also morphed you into a duller, less joyful version of yourself. It wasn’t shocking, that that would happen. Regulus was everything to you. He was what made you enjoy your classes so much, enjoy going doing to Hogsmeade, enjoy sneaking out past curfew. Now all them memories were just . . memories. Memories that you needed to forget.

Eventually, you had managed to overcome this downfall in your life. Stepping over it and being able to return to your old self. Not constantly thinking of the boy. Happy, old you, who hadn’t a notion Regulus even existed; only knowing him as ‘Sirius’ cold, younger brother.’ But oh, how much your heart used to ache everytime Sirius entered the common room with a playful grin on his face. He reminded you so much of when Regulus used to smile at you with twinkling eyes.

The wind was chilled, blowing softly through strands of your hair. You were sitting by the edge of the astronomy tower, leaning on the rail that stood strong in front of you. The floor you sat on was frozen cold under your fingertips.

Often times, you came up here and just sat on the ledge of the rails. You liked to watch the stars when you couldn’t sleep. It calmed you, seeing as there was a war going on around you, as well as just calming any anxieties you had.

To your luck, each time you came up here, you never stumbled across a certain boy you were wanting to avoid. Speaking of . . Regulus, you had noticed he tended to disappear recently. The Slytherins were always acting mysterious, going off places, missing classes. You had a suspicion on what they were doing but, you can’t just accuse people of that.

You sighed, it was getting late and you were already too deep into your thoughts. You really should be focusing more of your time on studying for the end-of-year exams, not wasting it up here, drowning in your thoughts.

Rising from your spot, your hands were gritty from sitting on the stone. You wiped them off on your clothes before turning around and walking over to the stairs. At the top of the stairs stood a figure. Regulus stood two steps ahead of you.

His eyes were red and he made no attempt to hide it. It was silent for a moment. He then broke the silence by calling out your name. “Regulus,” you replied, voice cracking slightly. Fuck. You really did think you were over him, but now here he was in front of you again and you were already about to keel and cry.

“What do you want?” Your voice was harsh, full of bite. It was a pitiful attempt to push back your tears and replace them with anger. But you weren’t crying yet; you were merely teary-eyed.

“I’m so sorry, my love. I know you don’t want to talk to me, and I only did what you wanted. But we must now.” Your eyebrows furrowed in both confusion and resentment towards the boy. ‘What is he talking about?’ You thought. You stayed silent, letting him continue, to which he took the hint. “I—I needed to see you one last time.” One last time? He was starting to worry you. Your expression turned from one of bitterness to one full of anxiety. “Reg, what are you talking about?” Your voice was strained.

He stepped towards you, taking your shoulders between both hands. Instead of being warm and comforting like you last remembered, they were now as cold as tiles. “You need to listen to me,” you nodded your head as he spoke, “I’ve defected the Dark Lord.”

“What?” You felt as if you were out of breath, panting as he towered over you. “I never wanted to join them. My parents, they pressured me into doing it—becoming a Death Eater. That’s why Sirius ran. That’s why he ran. But I’m not strong, like him. I couldn’t abandon them, so I joined. But it’s gone too far. He’s attacking hundreds of families. It’s not right.” His eyes were gloomy and seemed a darker, thundery grey in this lighting. “Regulus-”

He cut you off, “No. No, just listen. The Order would never trust me, so I’ve found a way to help. They wont know but I have to do something.” This time, you cut him off, holding onto his forearms, “I don’t—what are you saying, Regulus.” Merlin, the tears were flowing down your face already.

He sighed sorrowfully. “I’m leaving tomorrow. Voldemort—he,” he looked away from you. “Look, I found out about a scheme he has. I intend to end it. Attempting this will cost me my life, doll. I’m so sorry, for everything I’ve done. I just need to have you one last time.”

You looked deep into his eyes, his into yours. Long floods of tears streamed from your eyes but you didn’t do anything to stop them now. Regulus leaned in and kissed you. You let him, kissing back equally as harsh.

He pulled away, tears falling from his gorgeous grey eyes. “I love you, I always have and I always will.” “I love you too,” you weakly replied. Your foreheads connected, noses touching and lips curling into each other. You kissed him once again. Passionate and desirable; as if you would never see him again, but that seemed to be the truth.

That night when Regulus left, you fell to your knees, creating small cuts in your smooth skin, breaking blood. It was the last time you saw Regulus black.

After that treacherous night, Regulus went missing from school. Whispers around school started. People spreading around that he was ‘murdered by Voldemort’ or ‘killed by one of the Death Eaters for cowardly betraying them’. You constantly had searched for them stormy blue-grey eyes in the corridors, looking desperately for them on the Slytherin table, laughing with Evan Rosier, but to no avail. He was gone—presumed dead, the Order had said—and the pit in your stomach since that night remained as you packed your belongings, ready to return home for summer break. Fiddling with the last thing you had to remember him by, the dainty silver necklace he gave you on the day you two got together.

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