This made me think of Dust and Swap leaving their respective theaters at the same time, halfway through the movie, to buy an extra refill of popcorn.

My mind has nothing concrete but something tells me it could be an interesting conversation ╮⁠(⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠)⁠╭ (maybe also a little awkward?)

**********

Chaotic duo ♡

Making sense of love for love's sake: the game

Despite all the things i absolutely adore about how the plot unravels and expands in love by love's sake, upon first watch, there's some things i couldn't piece together, which @lurkingshan echoes in their post:

'The way the author was messing with Myungha and forcing cruel choices on him really does not track with a desire to help him find happiness.'

And to preface, this is not something i fully get yet either. I think i'll need a good month and a sizeable reading list of relevant resources to understand just what/who this author/sunbae is and what his role is and how he is associated with myungha. But as always with the best shows for meta (aka bad buddy), as a plot unfolds, you can always find a better understanding by looking backwards and re-contextualising what you've already seen. so i watched ep 1, specifically the scene between myungha and his sunbae at the bar. And i will talk about how everything said in this scene has a whole new meaning now we know the full story, but for now i wanna focus on that question that they keep coming back to; "Then... will you change it for him?".

When you watch the show for the first time, your brain follows the simplest, most obvious version of the story you're being told, one where myungha has been pulled into the world of his sunbae's novel that's being turned into a game and given the opportunity to fix the thing he didn't like about it; making yeowoon happy, and thus you just think the rules of the game are imposed by the author, and so when these cruel choices first come up, you see them as the difficult roadblocks that are nevertheless necessary to any kind of game, forcing the player to make an impossible choice so that the game can continue in a certain direction and its only after that you learn whether it was the right choice or not, or there is no right choice, it simply changes the game you are playing.

And when its revealed what this game actually is, at first i tried to interpret these cruel choices, namely the choice between yeonwoon and myungha's grandma, and at best i could come up with the concept of this being a choice between staying stuck to the past aka choosing his grandma, even though he knows that choice doesn't mean she's safe bc he knows the future where he loses here, its an inevitability, but thats the small happiness he knew before it was taken away and thus that happiness is known and safe, theres no risk, versus choosing to pursue a new happiness, a love of yeowoon and thus himself, which he doesn't know, he hasn't experienced yet, and could be risky. Its a happiness that isn't guaranteed like his grandma, but its a happiness that looks to the future and has hope in it that he can find a new happiness to pursue despite what has happened in his past.

And that fits nice, okayish. But then i watched ep 1 and heard that question "Then... will you change it for him?" And watching through the rest of the eps, we come back to this scene at the bar and each time we get a new run up to the author asking this question, either new dialogue is added or we hear a different piece of the conversation entirely. It starts at the beginning of ep 1 as:

"Because Cha Yeowoon is the only one who's miserable." "It can't be helped that some people's lives are like that" "The fact that some people are destined to live that kind of life is what's vile."

Then a bit later in ep 1 we go back and its expanded.

"It can't be helped that some people's lives are like that" "The fact that some people are destined to live that kind of life is what's vile." "Why? Do you think you'd write it differently?" "Yes, definately. Someone like Cha Yeowoon, or someone like me with an awful life, can also be happy."

And then all the way on in ep 6, we get this new dialogue.

"I don't like talking about destiny." "Why?" "Because it means everything is predestined." "Then do you not believe in fate?" "Fate and destiny are the same. My grandma likes to say that. She said life is like a written book, and how you'll live and die are written in it. (...)I don't like things like this. Even if fate is already destined, I think it can still be changed. Otherwise, there's no point in trying." "Really? Then Myungha..."

And while we don't hear the author ask the same question, I feel like him getting cut off like that insinuates that the conversation leads to that same ending point. All that is to say, every time we hear this question being asked, its like we learn more and more about what this whole thing is, what the game is, what myungha is saying he will do by agreeing to do what the author asks. And every time, we see myungha being more defiant against the idea of yeowoon being resigned to his miserable ending. He starts off thinking that kind of life is destined, and while it's miserable, its not something he can fight. Then he says he'd want to write the story differently, bc yeowoon, or even him, could be happy. He challenges the idea that yeowoon, and thus himself, is fated to be miserable, and opens up the possibility for happiness for them both, but doesn't yet have the means or resolve to do it, its like he knows its possible on a fundamental level, but doesn't see it as something he can actually achieve. But then we circle back to the idea of destiny and books, both of which came up in the previous quote, and seems incredibly pertinent seen as this whole thing is about a novel this author has written. Myungha talks about how he hates the idea that life is a book where everything written is predestined to happen, from the moment you live to the moment you die. He says "Even if fate is already destined, I think it can still be changed. Otherwise, there's no point in trying." That vile way of life he described before that he said was destined, he is now saying it can be changed, and that possibility is now something he's holding onto, its what he sees hope in so that he can keep trying, bc now he finally is trying, he has the resolve, he's trying to realise this thing, this impossibility of rewriting the life he thought was destined through the way he loves yeowoon.

And coming back to those cruel choices, given this fresh context, it made me think. bc this isn't actually a game that myungha has been put into where the rules are dictated by an author completely separate from him. He said himself, he'd rewrite it, he'd change things for yeowoon. And when you start to think of it less as him fighting against a rigid, removed system and more like him being a character in a story he is trying to rewrite himself, that has both the author and his own limitations, or just his own if you're in the school of thought that the author is some figment or part of myungha himself or his conciousness, then you can start to see where these cruel choices might come from. They could be myungha, the author making edits to this new story, imposing his own doubts and limitations on himself. When he says he has to pick between Yeowoon and his grandma, what if that's the new author myungha seeing this story unfold and thinking no this isn't right, he can't have it all, i'm not deserving of this much happiness.

And what makes me like this idea even more is that when we get that second choice between ending after 14 days or getting 100 days back at the cost of resetting Yeowoon's affection to 0, that whole conversation happens in what I think the bar actually is which is this frozen moment in time where myungha is in the water with this extension of a voice in his head that is talking through these things. That conversation in itself needs its own post, but when you look at it both as a decision to break up or not or a decision to hold onto life or not, you can see how the author is just this soundboard relaying the decisions myungha is going through in his head. The author's voice is his own, weighing up his decisions. And if he is the author here, it only reinforces that the person making the rules of this game is him. You can even extend it further to the idea of the debuffs, where he puts in place this thing that makes it so he causes harm to yeowoon when he's around, and its only by garnering affection that he can prevent it. He gives himself a reason from the get go to stay away from yeowoon and reason it as him doing it for yeowoon's safety, when in fact the only way to make yeowoon safe is to increase his affection, which he can only do by being near him. Its a system that at first gives myungha a reason to stay away aka not like himself, but ultimately says the only way you're going to make yeowoon like you, or the only way you can like yourself, is if you accept risk. And that in itself screams to me of a myungha writing in these game systems that are trying to encourage his own-self love while falling at the hurdle of his own lack of self-worth.

The idea is still messy in my head even for me, but i just really like the idea that myungha could be trying to fix this thing both as a character and game master, and that both these versions of him have these flaws that manifest in their different ways to cause the events we see. It kinda is the definition of being your own worst enemy, the idea that in order to work towards loving yourself, the biggest obstacle you have to encounter is yourself, bc we are the ones holding ourselves back, making all these rules that make it harder to like ourselves and pursue our own happiness. The voices in our head telling us that we aren't good enough and aren't deserving are our own, and while the things that happen to us can inform what they say, we're the one's reinforcing those words. And what this show teaches us is that, if we're the one holding that pen all along, we can choose to change what those words are. If we make the rules, you don't have to create a game with concrete ultimatums, you can create a game where rules don't control you. Instead, you make the decisions, and you can make the ones that make you happy.

IMAGINE. working at ur stupid uhhh job or whatever. pulling into your drive way and ready to work on some crazy project in your garage. opening the door to the most unfamiliar silence. did your wife and kid leave for something? could you imagine knocking on your kids door, hardly getting an answer, and opening it to find the splattered remains of your wife across his room your child is scared! hes hardly consolable, in a state of shock and terror. you are too, but youre the adult here. you need to take charge. you need to protect him. you need to do something. you need to do something.

ppl kind of annoying me saying hobie should've had a hairstyle that resembles a spider as if his freeforms/wicks don't already do that PLUS they are like a loced version of liberty spikes. yes the design where he has twists is beautiful (eye myself even said i was in love with the design) but his final design is so special and incredible people seriously don't understand how amazing it is that a character who is considered cool has the type of locs people consistently call "dirty" and claim it is an indicator of not taking care of yourself/being unkempt. to me his hair gives us way more insight into his character than any of the badges or even his dialogue, he is comfortable and confident in his blackness, he does whatever he wants, his hair is the coolest fucking thing about him. he let's it grow freely - his opposition to those in control is seen through his hair

headcanon that effie crochets and when sirius runs away to live with the potters she makes sirius and james blankets so they can always have something to comfort them when shes not around

she makes another for remus for full moons when he and sirius start dating

and another which she gives to a very confused regulus at the end of Christmas holiday on platform 9 3/4

one day regulus shows up on the potters’ doorstep after a particularly bad fight with his mom wrapped in the blanket

effie had only ever made the blankets so the boys would know they had a place to call home where they could be wrapped in her warm embrace instead of blankets

the most bedraggled looking man alive <3 pickle inspector character sheet completed

Guardians of the Galaxy Headcanon

Nebula’s new nanotech arm was built by Tony Stark, as a gift, she didn’t get it until the funeral

you've heard of being "touch starved", now get ready for "touch hangry"

Idk Kohga face HC or something [ He/They/it ]

Black hair ver.

| Idk I never really had a set face reveal design for this fat fuckass, he'd always look NOT the way I picture him- Even this isn't really that close to how I'd want him to be... But guess close enough I s'pose....

Also why does he deepthroat bananas so well in AoC Koei, how do you know thIS KOEI-

But potentially this may be the best design of him I'll do so... Yeah, genderfluid looking aa bish I still have a deep love for him that isn't going away and I am unhealthy with this obsession hhhhhh,,,, Since BotW ofc so he is definitely plaguing my life in a not good way..

... I love my wife- I miss my wife tails, I miss her a lot-

Anyways, not much has changed with him, he (imo Idc) is still a 20 something yr old (120-something in BotW/TotK) shortstack who gives major bitch vibes and is in fact a major bitch hh, is the most secretive lewd artist even to his clan, can't cook for shit and math isn't his strongsuit- But can do the math when it comes to his passion hhhh //cough Sheikah/Zonai neeeeeerd-

The way his pretty ugly ass looks is the only difference and that's it- hfhbf

.. He'll still forever be besties with Zelda after the events in AoC as they become nerds for Sheikah and eventually Zonai tech, and then go "harass" Purah and Robbie (mainly Robbie since Purah is def more chaotic than he is), also Koh loves getting on Impa's nerves since they both share a love interest who's also a grampa (//cough Sooga cuz at least before the DLC, I actually had a proper HC for the "Yiga hubs" that actually works BETTER for them. So I'm sticking to my guns and paying attention to how THEY met and got together,,, to which any 'o ya'll who are interested hmu or spam my inbox so I can get into detail, and no the AU I now scrapped no longer applies anymore so forget about shit ass childhood, scummy step family and killer sister... Well I'mean Koh still has a shit ass dad but this ain't about him so- Oh wait nvm, people never gave a shit before so why would they n o w )

DON'T FORGET TO MENTION ABOUT THE BINDER HE WEARS UNDER HIS UNIFORM SO HIS BIG NATURALS DON'T BOUNCE UP AND DOWN ALL IN HIS BABY FACE

-

Close ups:

White hair alt

Black hair alt

PERSONALLY. The Yiga still have their traditional Sheikah white hair, it's only ever a choice if they dye it black or not aaaaand- The floof on their uniform is just a head piece,,,,, otherwise Sooga has some stupid ass hair

...

I said what I said, you heard me... And I stand by that statement, the floofs on their heads is DECORATION!! It's just easier to call it hair for the "Creating a Champion" book! Also cuz duh, Eng translation!!

.... Anyways, as an avid lover of this loser, my self conscious, thicc ass scrunkly boy with the wide birthing hips since the BotW days,,, He is my wife, my girlfriend, my bestie, my husband, my boyfriend my enemy, my lover, my victim, my babygirl and my family.. All in one-

....

Shut the fuck u-

. Art © Me . DON’T RE-POST .

Also yeah changing my watermarks and @ 's again cuz my older one was kinda hard to see, so I kinda gave 'em more of a colourful design and ngl really liking it a lot!

I was gonna try getting Glaze and Nightshade to work for somewhat extra protection on my art but my laptop is too old and definitely on it's last legs for it to run the programs properly.. So the over watermarking and adding my overdoing my sig for my current OC refs and future art will be enough for now..

Anyways, I'll add OC refs to their bio posts at a later date til I got all of the current refs updated and touched up...

Was thinking back to the time that Jonathan was like “what a lovely study, the furniture is so inviting, I don’t doubt this is where the ladies wrote their letters, I’m feeling very feminine <333” before being attacked by the Weird Sisters...

and then I walked into another room and just said to myself: “yallemagne, no, don’t--”

Transwoman Jonathan Harker

( tag dump!! c: ) tag dump pt. 2.

MINI RANT INCOMING ; how .  .  . how  the  f***  do  some  folks  in  the  tags  have  the  impression  that  the  s1  scene  of  Steve  smashing  Jonathan’s  camera  could  have  anything  to  do  with  him , Carol , and  Tommy  wanting  to  “humiliate  Nancy” ? like  .  .  . what ???

I’m .  .  . hmmm .  .  . alright .

I  know  that  critical  thinking  isn’t  one  of  the  strong  suits  of  the  ST  fandom  as  a  whole ( and yes , this  sounds  mean , that  is  on  purpose , btw ) but  in  what  world  can  anybody  believe  that  primarily  Steve’s  actions , but  also  Tommy  being  his  usual  helpful  omega  male  self , were  not  even  a  little  justified  and  -  more  importantly  -  largely  served  to  PROTECT  Nancy . Steve  is  still  actively  dating  Nancy  at  this  point , why  the  hell  would  he  want  to  humiliate  his  girlfriend ?

I’m  fully  aware  that  the  Duffers  love  to  use  certain  means  to  build  up  a  bias  for  or  against  characters . when  we  first  meet  Jonathan , he’s  the  caring , gentle  older  brother  who’s  a  bit  weird ( relatable  for  most  of  us ) and  quiet  and  a  touch  shy ; a  character  one  can  easily  sympathize  with . at  the  same  time , the  first  impression  we  get  of  Carol  and  Tommy , is  via  Barb , another  sympathetic  and  lovable  character , who  personally  doesn’t  like  the  two  and  thus  only  hands  us  the  perspective  that  they  both , for  no  reason  she  ever  actually  mentions , are  horrible  people . we  go  into  the  first  actual  scenes  with  them  somewhere  around  ep 2 , already  believing  they  are  awful  and  neither  ever  really  gets  a  chance  from  the  fandom  after  that  point . now  by  the  time  Steve  smashes  Jonathan’s  camera , people  surely  will  have  an  idea  of  who  the  characters  are ( and  that  Jonathan  indeed  is  a  sweet  kid , but  a  little  weird , while  we  simultaneously  are  to  believe  that  Tommy  and  Carol  are  awful ) so  I  understand  a  certain  wish  for  specific  perspectives  and  outcomes , but  come  on  !

hate  on  the  alleged  “ bullies ”  as  much  as  you  want ( funnily  enough  neither  of  them  are  ever  actually  shown  to  bully  anybody  -  I can  write  a  whole  other  rant / hc  on  Tommy’s  graffiti  on  the  theatre , but  oh  well ) the  one  clearly  in  the  wrong  there  is  Jonathan and  Steve  & co  have  every  right  to  be  pissed  at  him . Steve  most  likely  wants  to  save  Nancy’s  reputation  by  making  sure  that  there  are  no  photos  of  her  in  her  underwear , first  of  all . besides  that  obvious  point , what  happened  here  is  a  clear  violation  of  the  privacy  of  all  four  of  them .  Steve , Tommy , and  Carol  seem  a  little  blasé  about  the  fact , sure , but  consider  that  they  are  supposed  to  be  the  “ cool  kids ” . all  three  of  them  would  die  without  their  carefully  crafted  reputations , so  what  do  you  do ? you  keep  discomfort  under  wraps  -  which , however , doesn’t  mean  they  didn’t  feel  any . imagine  you  found  out  someone  was  hiding  in  the  bushes  by  your  house  and  took  pictures  of  you  without  your  consent  or  knowledge .  .  .

truth  be  told , for  people  who , allegedly , are  so  goddamn  awful , their  handling  of  the  situation  is  remarkably  benign . smashing  Jonathan’s  camera , pushing  him  around  a  little , ripping  the  pictures  apart .  .  . it’s  uncomfortable , but  not  horrible . we  never  see  any  further  consequences  for  Jonathan , or , in  fact , Nancy  later  on . neither  Carol , nor  Tommy , seemingly  tell  anyone  that  Jonathan , essentially , is  a  stalker . neither  tell  anyone  that  pictures  of  Nancy  in  her  underwear  exist(ed) . they  had  the  chance  to  ruin  both  of  them  in  the  wake  of  this  and  didn’t . now  before  anyone  screeches , this  is  not  me  saying  meeting  the  basic , lowest  standard  of  human  etiquette  automatically  makes  you  a  good  person .  .  . this  is  me  saying  these  two  aren’t  the  irredeemable  assholes  the  fandom  likes  to  believe , and  that  some  of  the  things  they  do , even  though  leaning  on  the  mean  scale , are  justified .

let’s all imagine that wayne has had eddie since he was kid

little eddie being one of those kids who is always running off and getting into things he shouldn’t and wayne gets tired of having to chase him down every time they go to the grocery store or the laundromat so he puts a leash on him

he’s forced to wear it much longer than any other kid would bc even when eddie isn’t trying to get away, he’ll get distracted by something and doesn’t notice wayne is still walking and then he ends up getting lost in the aisles trying to find wayne again

So, I have news on the aragane no ko front

I finally found the courage to ask the author about Benito's gender (and used all my Interact With People slots for the next ~37 years, goodbye world) and she replied that "he" would be correct.

Thus

PINNED

TOA Canon [Underground Citizen of Abyss/Ashen Wolves Professor at the Officers Academy]

FATES [Post Hidden Truths, Route Unspecified]

Post Hidden Truths, revived the power of his dragon half. He is mentally unstable due to the influence of King Anankos, and does not remember any of the time between his death and arriving at Garreg Mach. He knows he died, and then he woke up at the entrance to Abyss. Hence he decides to remain there for now, he does not know himself anymore and does not wish to accidentally hurt anyone with what he does not know. He is confused for the most part, but he knows that he has done awful things in the past. Atonement is not an easy path, but... is there not to be something said for trying?

ABOUT | INTERVIEW | Please kindly do not use small text! (post)

He is not aware of the events of any of the paths, returned to rest with the body as an empty husk of a soul. It doesn't really matter which route it is, since the details are handwaved anyway lol.

He will behave in much the same way as he does in Heirs of Fate, confused and slightly erratic. His memories are a tangling mess, so he isn't exactly sure what is what anymore.

He has only ever loved two people, Cadros and Mikoto. Though he will never acknowledge his love of Cadros, as he feels as though he betrayed him during his accidental death at his hand.

He likes animals, as they will not judge him as humans will. His favourite animals are turtles, he feels a bit of kinship to them, given that dragons are technically reptiles as well.

He loves his children very much, though his knowledge of them is limited due to dying soon after learning Lilith was his daughter and because he sent Corrin away with his mother when she was still a baby.

Because of his benevolence, and a deep love for the world and everyone in it, even if he is terribly confused as to who he is, he has a tendency to somewhat take any students without parents/who seem lonely under his wing, treating them as if they were his own children.

He does not think of himself as ever being a king. Valla’s only true kings were Cadros and his family line, he does not deserve that title.

Chronic apologizer, even for things that he was not responsible for. (Not actual fates events, more like. If someone else knocks something over in his presence, he'll act like he's the one who needs to apologize.)

He does not retain any of his draconic powers, at least for the most part. And he doesn’t mind that all that much. He is perfectly content with remaining as his human avatar. Things are better this way, they feel better this way.

His appearance either looks something like this or this. As much as I like the look of normal Anankos, I think he deserved to be a little fucked up even in his human form. There has to be a reason why he hides under his cloak all time, after all.

He does not know of Kana or any other children that Corrin may have.

tagdrop

v: princess of alderaan ( please picture me in the trees ) v: before the wars ( now come the days of queen breha; may they be blessed ) v: the clone wars ( i will not change our traditions for a repellent regime ) v: an imperial galaxy ( we can outlast the empire ) v: imperial occupation ( i was a queen and you took away my crown ) v: surviving alderaan ( is a queen still a queen with no planet and no people )

: bail organa ( i take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover ) : leia organa ( she will be loved with us ) : winter retrac ( little golden moon and stars ) : fess ilee ( if anything ever happens to me and you’re in trouble go to fess ) : ferus olin ( only twenty minutes to sleep but you dream of some epiphany ) : deara antilles ( when the words of a sister come back in whispers ) : padmé amidala ( i wish more than anything that you could see her grow ) : alderaan ( alderaan is peaceful; we have no weapons ) : visage ( gleaming twinkling eyes like sinking ships on waters ) : canon quotes ( the stuff of legends )

: aesthetics & wardrobe ( with beauty or the appreciation of beauty) : art ( some people are so talented ) : my edits ( liesl makes things ) : musings ( take me to the lakes where all the poets went to die ) : headcanons ( my mind turns your life into folklore ) : wishlist ( first star i see tonight ) : imagery ( slow motion double vision in rose blush )

r: family ( loving someone deeply gives you courage ) r: breha organa & leia organa ( my daughter is a miracle who never ceases to be miraculous ) r: breha organa & bail organa ( life was a willow and it bent right to your wind )